#hopefully i dont come off as insane
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oopsalltes · 1 year ago
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WHAT THE HELL EVEN ARE BOMBERMEN? (AN IN-DEPTH REIMAGINE AU LOOK INTO BOMBERMAN ANATOMY)
ridiculously long text dump incoming but i figured i'd finally go over some more technical stuff about the au. ive seen other people talk about their headcanons for how the bombermen work in-game and got a bit inspired since ive mostly been going over lore with my comics!
SO, WHAT ARE BOMBERMEN? true to most of the games, they are still robots in the au! entirely mechanical with no organic components. the vast majority of them originate from the former planet earth, now called planet bomber, but some models have been integrated into different planets (planet scrapheap for example) for specific jobs.
all bombermen come from "the original", Shiro, who was built by evil forces lurking underground on planet earth before it was renamed planet bomber. during his tenure as a reluctant minion of evil, his purpose was to create bombs for their efforts of subjugating the remnants of humanity on earth.
prior to his escape from the clutches of the evil forces, he looked very much like how he is depicted in the games!
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WHY DO THEY LOOK LIKE HUMANS NOW? in the original NES bomberman game, the plot revolves around bomberman's escape to the surface under the belief that he will become human. the AU follows this premise, but more literally: although Shiro doesn't actually become an organic human, he is rebuilt to resemble their appearance more faithfully! thus, all bombermen that come after him retain that human-like appearance.
this applies to the human experience as well. they can cry, taste food, live like humans even though they are artificial. they're aware of the fact that they aren't human, mind, but the line is very thin for some! Shiro goes so far as to say that he's just as human as any organic one because of his free will and his ability TO desire to be human. but most are pretty normal about it.
BASIC ANATOMY STRUCTURE bombermen possess an internal structure intentionally designed similar to that of humans. their endoskeleton is practically 1:1 of a human skeleton, the only difference being that it's obviously metal. they possess significantly less "organs", with most of their computer components centralized in a single case located where a human heart would be. their central processing unit and memory cards are located inside of the skull, reinforced by pure steel to prevent any potential internalized damage. while ripping off the outer layer of skin takes about as much effort as it would to a human, you'll be hard-pressed to actually penetrate their head/skull. pain receptors are probably the most complex and delicate in terms of structure, essentially microscopic detectors found across the body like nerves. the part of the processing unit that recognizes the feeling of pain can be manually turned off if needed, but is usually left on so that the individual is aware of damage or something malfunctioning.
all bombermen have an antenna attached to their left ear. this is used for communication with others across distance, and is also used to monitor their surroundings! it can pick up movement, energy, and other various things. it's one of their trademark identifiers, and can also be used as a sort of ID for other bombermen, so its very important to them! to remove their atenna is like declawing a cat.
don't.
like most computers, their capability of information storage is limited. although usually equipped with multiple memory cards, many bombermen elect to move data/memories they don't need all of the time onto items like USB drives so they don't need to outright delete things. their sleeping routines are the most effective way for them to undergo defragmentation.
with resources on earth having been very scarce, bombermen are equipped to run on multiple kinds of energy. like most computers, electrical energy is the most common and widely used, but their synthetic skin is capable of taking in solar energy and a furnace "stomach" can transform eaten foods into chemical energy - think of the latter as burning coal to fuel a locomotive. the one thing they DON'T use however is oil. its seen as very volatile source of energy because it's not renewable. this means they don't bleed! there's no need for them to have any liquid circulation, so replacing parts is also easier in that regard since there's no fear of losing any potential lifeforce.
ASIMOV? WHO'S THAT?? they do not follow the three laws. they are completely independent. most bombermen lean towards being good-natured (if not with their own quirks), so murder of organics/destruction of their own kind is HIGHLY taboo. this doesn't mean they're incapable of making that decision, though.
WHO BUILDS THEM? this answer is a little more complex. early in the timeline, the only way to make a bomberman was to build one yourself. this was especially apparent during earth's final years before being renamed, as most of humanity had abandoned the planet after the evil forces were reawakened decades prior. as such, bombermen were short in number because the few remaining humans that were technologically competent were the only ones capable of making them.
however, ALL bombermen are capable of recreating their own kind. this was information originally given to Shiro by the evil forces so that, for whatever reason, it would be instinct for him to prevent the extinction of his own existence. when more bombermen began to populate the planet, they started to do the creation themselves since they knew everything they needed in order to accomplish it. this is where familial relationships become possible! many bombermen who create their own kind view their creation as siblings or children, and this carries over further into the timeline even when a mother computer meant to mass produce models comes into existence.
WHAT'S IN A TITLE? "Bomberman" is both a species and a title. while most common bots will refer to themselves as "a bomberman", very few have the privilege of being called Bomberman. this name is reserved for particularly outstanding individuals who are responsible for the protection of planet bomber, meaning only a few of them exist across the timeline.
so far these include Shiro (the original), Ivory (Shiro's brother and the protagonist for most of the games that take place on Planet Bomber), and White (the sbr iteration - his siblings get privileges by association but since he's the only cracker white bomberman of the group he gets the official title). depending on how development of the timeline goes there might be more...
WHAT THE HELL ARE PSEUDO BOMBERMEN? I actually addressed this question on my twitter with a funny little comic but i'll go a little further in-depth with the discussion here.
as the name implies, these aren't considered to be "real" ones for various kinds of reasons. bombermen become very popular to imitate due to how (in)famous Shiro becomes across space, but building a robot might not exactly be conventional for some people. this is where pseudo bombermen come in. anything from bomber-cyborgs, organically made bombermen, etc are all considered pseudo bombermen. the general rule of thumb is if it isn't a robot, it's a pseudo.
notable pseudo-bombers would be Max (cyborg), Shirobon from Jetters (alien), and the Bomber Shittenou (made from elements).
ARE YOU GOING TO ADDRESS THAT LINE FROM YELLOW IN SBR2 sure they can have cock and balls why not. full human experience or something.
well that was long as fuck!! thanks for reading!!! if there are any questions feel free to leave them in my inbox and ill be sure to respond to them :)
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year ago
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#guess whos back in therapy bby 😎#the lady i saw was nice. 1st appointments r always a lotta blah blah blah so much to cover#and im always like bleh whatever im not that bad but when u put it all down on paper it is sorta a lot lol#i got the comment. hm u seem to kno a lot abt the dsm. and like listen. i have been meticulously categorizing my problems for the last 4#years. and i like to learn so ya kno. also said yea it sounds like u r having hypomanic episodes.#and asked if bipolar was a possibility and like if i was bipolar that would absolutely blow my god damn mind. im pretty sure its just pmdd#but whatever. im open to the possibility. mostly i wanna hear someone else perspective on this#i feel like im collaborating on a project. like gimmie ur notes i wanna see if were on the same track. bc im insane like that#i always feel bad when they apologize for asking invasive questions. like neh its fine. i got nothin to hide and i dont give a fuck#also i told a class of my peers that my distraction from research is drawing narut0 fan art. again bc i do not#give a single fuck. Professors response: hopefully we get to see it some day. bro. if u ask me i will show u. i do not care#i mean. probably nothing too weird but i feel like most of my stuff is safe to share. i just come off looking like a weeb i guess#but yea back in therapy bc my mum reminded me bc the ppl around me irl r also worried for my well-being based on my behavior lol#i mean its just bc i complain that im in like psychological pain a lot. so lots and lots of bitching abt my brain ^^#the lady i saw did fall a lil bit into my trap. like what woulf ur life look like if u had everything under control? bc it seems like ur#here and ur starting a phd what more do u want? and im like mwahaha but u see i can do school#i can do school so good. i am the best at school and thats it. i am otherwise barely functional#so i can be successful on paper and dysfunctional when it comes to having a life :-]#but whatever. well see what she wants to follow up on next week bc i threw a lot at her#also went to my office for the 1st time. it is really nice to sit in a working lab and watch ppl interact. but also i do feel like im#dying if i try to sit in that room with 2 other ppl lol. so well see how it goes. i may find somewhere else to hide#unrelated
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samwisefamgee · 2 years ago
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how does this week keep getting worse wtf
#this is. so fucking unbearable#the tinnitus makes me want to blow my fucking brains out i dont know why it got so much violently worse so fast#but i guess its like this forever now! and it only gets worse!#i thought id be able to deal with it but if it gets this much worse at this rate im so fuxking dead lol this is insanity#i cant take it on top of everything everything EVERYTHING else if god wants me dead this fucking bad she'll get it#life hasnt been worth it for 12 fucking years it CERTAINLY isnt worth it now that im blinder balder in more.pain and.crazier than ever#and the tinnitus makes the screaming in my head eternal#girl theres no point it just hurts to be alive#i cant pay to fix a single one of my problems and ill need tens of thousands of dollars to even kind of fix all of them#i never got to start my life#i never will. not as the person i was. or ever wanted to be. or even close. ive physically and mentally lost too much to do what id planned#and now i cant even live in peace normally even if i were able to 'fix' everything so much of this is permanent and degenerative#spent 24 years giving everything to my family and they returned the favor by leaving me in a rotting box to die and i let it work lol#only took abouy a year and a half too#my dad's family killed off their mentally ill youngest of six WAY faster than it took em to get to me so i guess they got rusty#anyway i love when the all consuming despair comes back im gonna go cry for a bit and hopefully fall back to sleep
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victim9d · 1 year ago
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I am insane rn
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notesof-mh · 2 years ago
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AHHHH JACKIE THIS WAS SO GOODDDDDD. your writing is unparalleled. and i cant believe wrote 9.3k words?? for me?? in a month?? truly insane <3 and im so sorry this took me so long, ive been busy and also wanted to savor my first read of it
also i feel like i have too many thought to just put them in the tags so im j dumping them here, i hope thats ok
It starts, as it always does with this particular collection of friends, with shenanigans and cahoots. 
honestly i truly love this intro. it gives this fic the feeling that this is just one of many different events the characters experience, like a single episode in a sitcom.
also w wonwoo in the first part i love how nonreactive he is?? like yes the message is anonymous but soonyoung and jun are just telling some stranger abt his love life? and also called him a “huge awkward loser”? but he just seems so resigned lol
“No, this will be good,” Junhui says, plopping down on the edge of Wonwoo’s bed. “Minghao told me that whoever runs the advice column in the school paper is, like, a love guru
also i truly believe that jun and minghao masterminded this whole thing trying to tell y/n that wonwoo was in love w her. and also i think there is too much evidence for this to not have been your intention. truly so tragic then that y/n is dumb and missed all the signs and that soonyoung somehow accidentally finally caused y/n and wonwoo to get together.
bc with all the messages signed by soonyoung and jun, there’s no way hao didn’t either tell them or strongly hint that those messages were guaranteed to be seen by y/n
Friday Free-for-alls, when you field confessions of all types. Dear Cherry, I need to get this off my chest. I’ve been using my roommate’s shampoo this whole semester, and today I found out that our two other roommates have also been using this roommate’s shampoo. He doesn’t suspect a thing.
maybe im remembering wrong, but wasn’t there an interview or something w i think wayv (or maybe another nct unit but pretty sure its them) where they admitted to using each others face soap (?) im probably wrong but is there any chance this was inspired by that?
Choi Seungcheol, fraternity president, football player, gym rat, jock, fuckboy extraordinaire— relationship advice columnist? No, it’s simply not realistic.
i love the concept of Scoups being the original Cherry (like the concept of one of his frat brothers writing in and him responding? but both doing it in secret?? idk i j love the image of it)
also the description of the albino squirrel as a good omen is such a cute and funny little detail to add!
“He’s not that bad,” you find yourself defending your fake boyfriend. “Mingyu is nice, and he’s really tall.”
You blink. Mingyu turns his pout on you now. “Nice and really tall? Are you for real?”
kajdfhjklhdfkjhd nooooo this description of mingyuuuuu. the way she tries to defend him but gives the most underwhelming reasons 😭😭😭
also the way jun immediately left w wonwoo when y/n revealed she was fake dating mingyu? such a good friend!!! we’d all be lucky to have a friend like jun 🥺
A part of you expects to see him in a different light, now that you think you love him, like there’s supposed to be cherubs singing and starlight in his eyes or something, but instead, you just see regular old Wonwoo. Your best friend. 
the realization that y/n loves wonwoo was so soooo well written and i loved this part of it especially. it rlly captures what i like so much abt the friends to lovers trope
“You can ignore him,” Minghao says, passing by with a full bottle of wine in each hand on his way to put them away in the kitchen. “I don’t think you should be giving any love advice when your own love life is a mess,” he sniffs.
i love love love the way you wrote bestie hao in this fic! the (well-deserved) judgement! the attitude! (also since im pretty sure he was masterminding this i love how he essentially gets to see firsthand his plan crashing and burning bc y/n is an idiot)
In retrospect, Mingyu was definitely going to win that Greek God competition, even if Jaehyun from Nu Kapp put up a good fight.
unrelated but you should know i still think abt those comments you made abt Jaehyun’s legs looking like chicken breast for the seoul city photos. you were very right but now i cant stop thinking abt it i checked and those photos were posted over a year ago 😭😭
“Overwatch,” you insist, tugging him towards the door. “Friday night. It’s Wonwoo and Y/N night.”
SHE REMEMBEREDDDDDD!!!!!!
The Wonwoo you know is shy and awkward and doesn’t quite know how to fit himself into social situations. He’s clumsy and absentminded and needs someone to take care of him, to dote on him and give him attention.
The Wonwoo that you know, you’ve known since you were in second grade, standing over the boy you had knocked over with a rubber kickball, staring at him as he sniffled on the woodchips and glared at you through big watery eyes. That day, you decided right then and there that this boy would be yours, and now…
awkejlfilaNj;oboajkdshfj something something -ill take care of you -its rotten work -not to me not if its youakdsjakjsdhkljhghjjkljkagjklahgei m screAMINGGGGG
It’s raw hurt, sharp, painful. His mouth twists and his brows furrow and he looks at you like you’re something to be afraid of. You hate it. You hate that you’re the cause of it, that he’s feeling this, whatever it is, because of you, even though you’re not sure why.
NOOOOOOOOOOO ajksdhfkjh its the way you describe the pain on his faceNOOOOOOOOO
“Go to sleep,” he says flatly. “Tomorrow you’ll wake up and go back to your boyfriend, and you’ll be happy that nothing happened tonight.”
im. in tears.
“You didn’t do anything embarrassing,” he grins, “except for abandoning your boyfriend at the party because you wanted to play Overwatch with me. C’mon, do you want to get brunch?”
noooo and the way the next morning hes still so caring and sweet 🥺🥺. if i were him i would’ve kicked y/n out of my apartment as soon as possible
“Yeah,” Wonwoo replies. His voice is tinny and quiet, but still clear, like he’s slipped his headset off and mic is pushed away. “I’m gaming with Y/N. I’m muted, don’t worry.”
ah yes the classic “im muted” but they’re not accidental confession. truly a favorite of mine
“I’m so glad we’re going to college together, Wonwoo. I want to be with you forever.”
And he had watched you as you said it, quiet, like he was breathless. Like you had said something terrible and incredible at the same time.
It’s always been Wonwoo beside you, lazy summers spent playing video games, late night phone calls where you’d talk and he’d listen, after class in his car listening to the radio and eating junk food. Had he loved you then? With ketchup on your shirt and acne across your face and poorly box-dyed hair? And had you loved him then too? Before you even knew what love is?
AAHAHHLAJHHHHHKAJLHDLAIUWHGLIUHUIHIUWEGUHUIAEGW AGAIN EVIDENCE YOURE SOMEHOW IN MY MIND CAPTURING EVERYTHING I LOVE ABOUT THIS TROPE AND EXECUTING IT TO PERFECTION!!!!!<333 ekjfhjh its all abt seeing the other at their most ordinary!!! and loving them for it!!!!!
“Wonwoo, I’m going downstairs,” you tell him.
“Wait–” his voice is tight and panicked, but you’re already tugging your headset off and grabbing your keys.
the parallel between earlier when y/n wanted to go down but didn’t after talking abt wonwoo’s crush and at the end when she realizes *she* was the crush?!!! *chefs kiss* (i do love me a good parallel)
“It was dark and I was tired. You didn’t notice that I passed out as soon as we dimmed the lights?” He raises his eyebrows as he defends himself, and you bury your face in your hands.
Click. The pieces are all falling in place.
the way he was sleeping?!!! so comedic and also so much better than the misunderstanding j being that y/n didn’t tell him
they’re idiots but i wouldnt have it any other way. i love when characters are idiots <3
“God,” he gasps between laughs, “we’re both so, so stupid.” And then you’re laughing too.
!!!
akjdfhjhh and the ending was so so so (x120398948949) sweet!
out of the frying pan and into your heart
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jeon wonwoo x female reader
tags: college au, fraternities, fake dating, misunderstandings, childhood friends to lovers, this all could have been resolved with some proper communication, lots of pining specifically for em, fluff, rom com, best friend minghao, y/n is oblivious!!!
warnings: alcohol, weed, frats, american college setting
words: 9.3k
synopsis:
it starts, as it always does with this particular collection of friends, with shenanigans and cahoots.
well, more specifically, for wonwoo it starts with shenanigans, when soonyoung and junhui somehow manage to collide brain cells and write in to the school newspaper's love advice columnist about his crush on his childhood best friend.
and for you, the aforementioned childhood best friend and, in secret, also the aforementioned love advice columnist, it starts with cahoots when kim mingyu manages to convince you to fake date him so he can win some popularity contest for his frat.
for @notesof-mh
.
.
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It starts, as it always does with this particular collection of friends, with shenanigans and cahoots. 
Well, more specifically, for Wonwoo it starts with shenanigans, when Soonyoung and Junhui somehow manage to collide brain cells. 
He had barely been awake for 15 seconds when they had barged into his room, laptop in hands, just to show him the text in a pink-colored submission box surrounded by heart emojis. Wonwoo squints, the blurry words coming into just enough focus for him to make out what they say. “Dear Cherry, I’m a third year computer science student and I’m in love with my best friend, except I’m— what the hell is this?” 
He glares at Soonyoung who grins cheerfully and points again at the screen. “Read the rest, Wonwoo!���
Wonwoo sighs and continues reading. “Except I’m a huge awkward loser and she’s so cool and pretty, and I don’t know how to tell her I like her. What should I do?”
“Alright, hit send,” Junhui instructs, tilting the laptop away and laughing maniacally. 
Wonwoo pushes his hand across his face, trying his best to wipe away the last vestiges of sleep-addled confusion, and then he realizes what’s happening.
“Wait, you can’t do that,” he tries to protest, but Soonyoung giggles and clicks a button.
“No, this will be good,” Junhui says, plopping down on the edge of Wonwoo’s bed. “Minghao told me that whoever runs the advice column in the school paper is, like, a love guru, and she has four thousand followers on instagram. And she’s never shown her face, but she’s probably also really pretty.”
Wonwoo groans. “I don’t see what that has to do with anything.”
“Just trust us,” Soonyoung pats Wonwoo’s knee through the blanket, “this is a good idea.”
And for you, it starts with kahoots, when your chemistry lab partner, Mingyu, pulls your stool closer to his side and whispers a proposition to you.
“Do you want to be my fake girlfriend?”
You narrow your eyes at him through your fogged up department-issued safety goggles. “Are you insane? What kind of fumes are you on?”
“None,” Mingyu replies. “I’m Sigma’s nominee for the Greek God award at the inter-fraternity tournament this year and I’m the only nominee who’s single.”
“And so I’m your pick,” you respond flatly. 
Mingyu nods eagerly. His safety glasses slide down his nose, and he has to push them back up. “Yeah, you’re so pretty and cool, I think it’d be really impressive if I somehow managed to pull you.”
“Huh.”
“And,” he adds on, lowering his voice even more, “Jeonghan thinks my only real competition this year is going to be Jung Jaehyun from Nu Kappa Tau, and rumor has it you rejected him in high school. Twice. So I think it’d be pretty funny if we ended up together.”
You scoff and turn back toward the titration in front of you. “You can’t go up to people and ask for things like this.”
“C’mon, you know the winner gets free parking for an entire semester,” he whines. “Ok, how’s this? If you’ll pretend to be my girlfriend for the Greek God award, I’ll write our lab reports for the rest of the semester.” 
His offer makes you pause, and he jumps on that pause, wedging his way in there. 
“I’ll give you executive editing power, but I’ll do all the work,” he wheedles, “and I’ll give you a perfect peer eval at the end of the semester. I promise,” he puts a big meaty hand on your lab notebook and smears the ink under his fingers. “Kim Mingyu isn’t a liar.”
“I’ll conveniently ignore the fact that you’re lying about having a girlfriend to win this award, then,” you roll your eyes.
“That’s different, though,” he protests, “the award is dumb and meaningless and I really want it. But a promise made between buddies is important.”
He looks earnest, so you decide to lay off on him just a little. “When we’re fake-dating,” you sigh, “you can’t call us buddies anymore.”
“So that’s a…”
You groan, hating yourself for being so indulgent. “Yes. That’s a yes.”
.
.
.
“Hold on Y/N, have you seen this?”
“Seen what?” You look over the top of your laptop screen, where you’re halfway through a paper on the Cuban Missile Crisis. 
Minghao, your co-admin of the school newspaper’s (infamous) advice column turns his screen towards you. “Someone wrote in calling themselves a huge awkward loser.”
“Huh,” you grin to yourself as you read over the message quickly. “That’s kind of cute, actually.”
“Of course you think it’s cute,” Minghao rolls his eyes. “I’m going to assign this one over to you.”
“Yeah, sure, but please,” you mutter, “can you be a bit more discreet about it?”
Minghao looks at you over the top of his glasses. “What, about us being Ask Cherry? It’s not as embarrassing as you make it out to be.”
“Be quiet,” you hiss, looking around, “someone could overhear!” You frown, and then quietly, you add on, “and it is embarrassing. I’m supposed to be a journalism major, and I’m here making up horoscopes and giving fake relationship advice three days a week.”
This is an overstatement, and Minghao rolls his eyes. You only make up horoscopes and give fake relationship advice one day a week (Mondays are for Matters Of The Heart, your schedule says). There’s also Am I The Asshole Wednesdays, a campus favorite, and Friday Free-for-alls, when you field confessions of all types. Dear Cherry, I need to get this off my chest. I’ve been using my roommate’s shampoo this whole semester, and today I found out that our two other roommates have also been using this roommate’s shampoo. He doesn’t suspect a thing. 
You hadn’t meant to end up in this position. You write serious pieces for the school newspaper too, reporting on the Student Government’s legislative sessions and the university’s semesterly budget for grants to culturally-centered student organizations. Those articles, you have your name attached to. But at the end of last year, the new editor-in-chief Jeonghan had approached you and convinced (strong-armed) you into becoming the new writer for the infamous advice column, Ask Cherry, since Cherry himself was quitting to make more time for other priorities.
(“And the kicker is,” you had complained to Minghao, “nobody will ever believe me.” Choi Seungcheol, fraternity president, football player, gym rat, jock, fuckboy extraordinaire— relationship advice columnist? No, it’s simply not realistic. 
“I’m sitting on the juiciest piece of gossip to cross my path in my entire life, and I can’t do anything about it,” you say dejectedly.
“Hmm.” Minghao doesn’t even pretend to be interested.)
But, despite your disastrous real-world love life, your clumsily dispensed life advice, and the completely made up horoscopes, Ask Cherry readership skyrocketed under your intrepid watch. Once, you told a reader that the albino squirrel that lives in the tree next to the physics building was a good omen, and the next day, rumor spread that an albino squirrel sighting would grant you an A on your next exam. For weeks after, people would scatter peanuts and pieces of toast by the base of the tree next to the physics building, until campus facilities had to fence the area off because raccoons were starting to show up instead. 
Minghao finding out had been a complete accident, after you had lent him your laptop to print out a paper that was due the next hour, but you had forgotten to minimize the window with your Ask Chrery submissions. Minghao, being someone who loves giving advice, both solicited and unsolicited, naturally joined in on this scheme of yours. 
“Anyways,” you shrug. You look up as Junhui steps into the public study area of the library and scans the tables twice before making eye contact with you, and then waving. “Minghao, did you invite the others over to study with us?”
“Yeah,” Minghao responds, raising an eyebrow at you. “You got a problem with that?”
“No, it’s just—“ you’re about to complain about never being able to focus on your work with the rest of them around, but the words die on your lips when you spot Wonwoo trailing behind Junhui with a bemused expression on his face and a cardboard tray holding bubble teas in his hands. You can’t help the grin that spreads across your face. “Hey guys,” you wave over to them, clearing off the table space next to you to make room for them. 
“I brought you a taro milk tea,” Junhui announces, gesturing behind him, “and a Wonwoo to boot.”
“He made me walk with him because he didn’t know your favorite drink,” Wonwoo explains quietly as he slides the drinks onto the table and takes his seat next to you. “Are you working on that international relations paper?”
“Yeah.” You take your taro milk tea. No ice, 50% sweet, tapioca pearls and grass jelly, just the way you like it. 
“Do you think you’ll be done by Friday?”
“I will be free by then,” you promise him, punctuating your statement by stabbing your boba straw through the film covering the cup. You’d rather suffer through an all nighter on Sunday than miss your regular Friday night gaming sessions with Wonwoo, a tradition the two of you have kept up since both of you were in middle school and still playing Starcraft.
“Anyway,” Junhui leans over the table, resting his chin on top of his interlaced fingers. “I have a funny story.”
You tear your gaze away from Wonwoo. “Hm?”
“So, you know that advice columnist for the school paper? Wonwoo submitted a question the other day. Well, Soonyoung and I did, but for Wonwoo.”
You feel your blood run cold. It’s not that you’re ashamed of running a love advice column, but it’s more that you’re… embarrassed. And you’ve been running it in secret for so long that at this point, you can’t even fathom anyone outside of Minghao knowing. Maybe when you graduate, you’ll do an identity reveal, but you’re not quite there now.
“Can we talk about literally anything else,” Wonwoo grouses, somewhat to your relief. he glares at Junhui, but the effect is somewhat dampened when he lifts his bubble tea to his mouth and loudly slurps up some tapioca pearls.
“Yeah,” you quickly agree, not eager to have your secret identity exposed.
Junhui steamrolls on ahead, however. “So. If you’re reading the column and there’s a question from someone who has a big stupid crush, you know who it’s from.”
Your breath catches in your throat. Wonwoo? A crush?
“Junhui,” Wonwoo groans, digging his fingers into the bridge of his nose, brows furrowed in an expression of exquisite pain. 
Minghao, however, leans forward and lets his glasses slide down his nose. He laces his fingers together. “A crush? On who?”
Junhui and Minghao both turn to stare at Wonwoo, who flushes beet red. 
“Oh, hey guys!”
You feel a heavy arm around your shoulder and turn to see, to your abject horror, Mingyu, who scoots his way onto the bench to squeeze in next to you. “What are you doing here,” you hiss at your oversized interloper, but Mingyu just glances pointedly at the spot two tables down where a bunch of upperclassmen are sitting and chatting. You recognize Choi Seungcheol, the president of Mingyu’s frat, and you sigh and deflate. Fine. A promise is a promise.
You smile weakly at the other three guys sitting at your table. “Surprise,” you say flatly,” Mingyu is my boyfriend now.”
You’re momentarily distracted by a loud honking noise as Junhui narrowly avoids choking on his bubble tea and spraying the table through his nose. 
“Mingyu?!” Minghao sounds simultaneously dismayed and slightly judgemental.
“C’mon, dude,” Mingyu whines, slumping like a kicked puppy. You pat his bicep soothingly. “You don’t have to make it sound that bad.”
Minghao and Junhui share a conspicuous glance. Mingyu isn’t the type of guy you’d usually go for, but you think this reaction is a bit uncalled for. “He’s not that bad,” you find yourself defending your fake boyfriend. “Mingyu is nice, and he’s really tall.”
You blink. Mingyu turns his pout on you now. “Nice and really tall? Are you for real?”
“It’s true,” you scowl at him. “Are you here to study, or did you just come by to get on my nerves?”
“Okay, well,” Junhui interjects sharply, “Wonwoo and I should get going.”
“Wait, but you two just got here,” you attempt to protest, but Wonwoo, who had been quiet this whole time, stands up and slings his backpack over his shoulder.
“I’ll see you later, Y/N,” he says to you, before leaving along with Junhui. 
(It’s not until later, when you’re lounging with Minghao in the living room of your shared apartment, that it hits you, again, but this time with its full weight.
“Wonwoo likes someone,” you say out loud. It’s not a question.
Minghao glances up form his book at you with a frown plastered across his face, his brows creased with irritation. He evaluates you carefully over the silver rims of his glasses, which you know aren’t prescription but are mainly there to make him look elegant and intellectual.
“...yes,” he finally acknowledges.
You frown despite yourself. “I wonder who it is.”
“What does it matter to you,” Minghao scoffs, “you’re dating Mingyu, remember?”
“You can pretend to hate Gyu, but I know you like him better than any of the rest of us.” You really hadn’t been expecting to defend Mingyu twice in a day, but you suppose that’s life as Kim Mingyu’s girlfriend. “And anyways, Wonwoo and I have been friends since we were kids. I can’t believe he didn’t tell me earlier.”
“Yeah, he probably can’t believe it either,” Minghao mutters under his breath so quietly, you almost miss it. Then, in a louder voice, he chides, “don’t think too much about it, yeah? You still have to reply professionally to his advice request. His anonymous advice request.”
“Right,” you sigh dejectedly, frowning at your laptop balanced across your knees. “How do I tell him that he’s not a nerd and a loser without giving away that I know who he is?”
Minghao shrugs. “Maybe tell him to be patient. Or maybe tell him to try to start getting over his crush.”
You consider his suggestion for a moment. It’s appealing, but then the thought of Wonwoo wasting away in his dark bedroom, sighing as he pines over his unrequited love, flashes across your mind. “I just don’t want him to be sad.”)
.
.
.
“C’mon, he was right on top of you,” Wonwoo complains. You can hear the creaking of his gaming chair in the background, undoubtedly as he rises from his reclined position to gulp down more of whatever energy drink he has in his mini fridge this week. You groan and dig your fingers into the junction between your neck and shoulder, trying with little success to work out the knot that’s developed over this last round of PUBG.
“Wonwoo, that’s the problem, I suck at close range,” you huff in response, “you know I get panicky and forget to turn off auto-fire.”
It’s game night, and you and Wonwoo have been at it for the past two hours. Your paper isn’t done yet, but it can wait. It’s been over a decade since the years when the two of you would spend your summers together playing video games and walking aimlessly around the neighborhood with half-melted popsicles, talking for hours. But even as your social circles diverted from his, it’s always been something of an unspoken agreement that for this, you’d always make time for Wonwoo, and he’d always make time for you.
“Another round?” You and Wonwoo both ask the question at the same time. There’s a pause, and then you’re both laughing. Even over the headset mic, Wonwoo’s laugh is loud and unrestrained. It feels like a secret, a side of Wonwoo that he saves just for you and for Friday nights spent on opposite sides of the monitor.
“So.” You’re still waiting for the next match to start when Wonwoo breaks the comfortable silence. “Mingyu?”
You fidget at the ties of your hoodie. It’s stolen from Wonwoo, and you’ve had it since middle school at least. “Yeah?”
“Interesting choice.”
“What does that mean?”
He makes a casual, noncommittal noise. “I’m just surprised. I didn’t see it coming, and you didn’t tell me about it.”
You open your mouth to tell him that it’s actually all a ruse, to explain the whole situation, but the hard, petulant edge to his voice makes you pause. Wonwoo sounds… upset. But not quite upset. Jealous?
“Wonwoo,” you laugh. Onscreen, the timer counting down to the start of the match appears, and you jam on the space bar to make your character jump over his character’s prone body. “Wonwoo, are you jealous?”
Over your headphones, you hear the sound of his gaming chair squeaking. “I’m not jealous,” he says, in a tone of voice that sounds exactly like Wonwoo when he’s jealous. 
“You are. Where are we landing?” You toggle to the map in the game and zoom in on the path that the plane is taking. The player count in the bottom starts dropping as other players jump out. 
“Blue marker, does that look good to you? There’s a few houses we can loot, and it’s not close to the flight path. If we get bad circle placement, you can shoot me in the foot, if you want. As a treat.”
“Yeah, fine. Lead the way, boss. Anyways, why are you jealous?” You suppress the flutter in your chest. There’s no reason for you to get your hopes up. 
“You’re my friend,” Wonwoo says simply. It feels like a heavy towel being thrown over you. “You used to tell me everything. Mingyu is… fine,” he admits reluctantly. “He’s a good guy. I’m happy for you.”
Your heart clenches. You want to say something soft and sincere, but instead, you return with a jab. “You can’t be upset at me for keeping secrets, Wonwoo. What was Junhui saying about you liking someone?”
“Junhui just says stuff sometimes,” he replies curtly. 
You frown. “Junhui isn’t a liar, though. Who is it?” You ask, despite everything in you telling yourself that you don’t want to know the answer. “Who are they? Maybe I can talk to them for you.”
He laughs humorlessly. “It doesn’t matter. She’s in a relationship with someone else.”
You almost sigh in relief, but you stop yourself just in time. Why are you relieved? “Oh, Wonwoo. That sucks. She doesn’t know what she’s missing out on.”
Wonwoo makes a noise that tells you he’s shrugging. “She deserves better than me.”
“Hey!” You sit up, straightening your spine in indignation. “Don’t say that. You’re great, Wonwoo. You’re criminally underappreciated. You’re smart and you’re so sincere and kind, and maybe other people don’t acknowledge it, but you’re really funny and interesting.”
He’s quiet for a moment, and the only thing you hear is the game audio as your character collects supplies and clears the building the two of you are in. “Let me know if you find any gun that’s not a pistol, by the way. I have a 2x scope on me.”
“Thank you,” Wonwoo replies. You know he’s not talking about the scope.
Even though the two of you are gaming individually in your own rooms, you want nothing more than to tug off your headphones and go down the two flights of stairs to Wonwoo’s apartment and give him a hug.
“I have an AKM and a bunch of healing items on me,” Wonwoo says, “come to me and you can have whatever you want.”
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.
It would have been much less embarrassing if you had realized it last week when you were walking to class and Wonwoo had stopped you in the middle of the sidewalk to pluck a fallen leaf from your hair with that stupidly fond expression plastered on his face; or maybe when you accidentally fell asleep in his bed during an afternoon study session and woke up later with your head on his shoulder, legs tangled together, the sound of his soft snoring puffing in your ear, his hand held loosely in yours. Maybe in another life, it would have been one of those soft, romantic moments, like something out of a coming of age anime. But no, because you’re you and your life is the way it is, the moment you realize you’re in love with Wonwoo goes like this:
It’s Sunday, noon already, and you’re in Wonwoo’s shared apartment. Junhui had let you in earlier when you had knocked at their door until your knuckles were sore. When you burst unceremoniously into Wonwoo’s bedroom, he’s still asleep with his glasses on, smudged and crooked, and his phone on his chest. You frown. “Wake up, Wonwoo. Did you fall asleep while watching dramas again?”
Wonwoo jumps slightly and lifts his head, brows furrowing. “Huh?”
“You said you’d go to lunch with me.” You extend your arms and spin to show off your cute, perfectly coordinated outfit, picked out specifically to match the instagram trap you’re going to. You even broke out the eyeliner and glitter eyeshadow to match the cute knit cardigan and wool miniskirt you put on. “What hat should I wear? The fuzzy bucket hat,” you hold up option one, “or the beret,” you hold up option two, looking down at Wonwoo expectantly.
Your best friend groans and collapses back onto the bed, eyes sliding shut. “Um. The beret.”
“Okay great, now get out of bed. Our reservation is soon and you still need to wash your face and get dressed.” You poke at his cheek, which is greasy from sleep and still bears the imprint of his pillow. 
“Can you get Minghao to go with you instead?” He doesn’t bother opening his eyes.
“Nope,” you respond, popping the ‘p’, “he has dance practice.”
“Mingyu?”
“He said he had a textile arts club meeting?” You frown. “I’m not sure what it is, but he’s been crocheting like crazy for it this week.”
“Um,” Wonwoo smacks his hand over his face, clearly trying to think of other options. He forgets, however, that he fell asleep with his glasses on, and ends up jamming the frames against this cheek. “Ow. Ok, what about, uh, Seokmin?”
You pout at him even though he can’t see it. “Wonu,” you whine, sitting down on his bed, “I want to go to lunch with you, though.”
At that, he finally cracks his eyes open. “Why?”
Because, you want to say, I don’t want to do this with anybody other than you. You briefly try to imagine doing this whole thing– dressing up, making a reservation, taking pictures and walking around town, huddling together in a cafe in the afternoon to watch the latest Nintendo Direct together– with anybody else, but you just quite settle on it comfortably. No. It has to be Wonwoo. Because Wonwoo is your best friend, because Wonwoo has always been there for you, because Wonwoo just gets you, better than anybody ever has, and every moment you spend with Wonwoo, you feel your mood lifting and relaxing. Because you trust Wonwoo and he trusts you, and because you know him, and you love him–
You love him.
Oh.
Oh.
You’ll have to process that later. “Because you have a car and you can drive me,” you tell Wonwoo instead, shoving the revelation down to the back of your mind and putting it in a box labeled problems for future me.
“Fine,” Wonwoo acquiesces, sitting up with enormous effort. His hair is still sticking up in all directions, making him look like a big dark dandelion. A part of you expects to see him in a different light, now that you think you love him, like there’s supposed to be cherubs singing and starlight in his eyes or something, but instead, you just see regular old Wonwoo. Your best friend. He doesn’t suddenly look like a vision sent from heaven, he just looks sleepy and crusty and a little greasy.
“Hurry up and brush your teeth,” you tell him, slapping him lightly on his belly and laughing at the resulting ouuff that jerks out of him, “you have morning breath and I can smell it from here.”
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Dear Cherry, my friend is in love with his childhood friend but she doesn’t love him back :( how do we make her fall in love with him? from anonymous
“Hm,” you sigh out loud, “I wonder if Soonyoung knows that the anonymous signoff is made moot by the fact that he emailed this one in instead of using the anonymous submission box.” You’re draped on the couch with your legs propped all the way up and your laptop on your chest as you scroll through this week’s Am I The Asshole Wednesday submissions.
“You can ignore him,” Minghao says, passing by with a full bottle of wine in each hand on his way to put them away in the kitchen. “I don’t think you should be giving any love advice when your own love life is a mess,” he sniffs. 
“You’re the asshole,” you announce, not looking up from your screen. “That was for you, Minghao.” Clearly, he’s still mad at you after you had revealed the whole Mingyu situation to him a few nights ago. You still remember the blistering look that Minghao had thrown at you, like you’re the dumbest human he’s ever had the supreme displeasure of knowing.
“I guess you don’t want to go to the dance team party with me, then,” your roommate responds smoothly, returning from the kitchen. It’s only 6pm, but Minghao is already dressed in a silk pajama set with a matching robe, lenseless glasses frames perched on the tip of his nose, smelling of strawberry-scented lotion as he pours himself a glass of wine.
You scowl at him.  “Fine. I don’t care.” Turning back to your laptop, you scroll past a few more boring submissions on your hunt for the truly salacious stuff your classmates get up to. “I wonder what Soonyoung is even talking about, though,” you mumble, half to yourself, as you click on the next interesting subject line.
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In retrospect, Mingyu was definitely going to win that Greek God competition, even if Jaehyun from Nu Kapp put up a good fight.
Mingyu’s physique is certainly impressive, and the audience erupted when he won the (shirtless and oiled-up, for some reason) pushup contest, but his clumsiness eventually led him to lose at every other physical challenge. It was his overwhelming victory in the popularity vote and personality contest that got him to first place. It’s probably all because of his unwavering friendliness and his constant need for affirmation manifesting into an overwhelming desire to be helpful, but you like to think that maybe you helped too.
That’s why you’re here, in the kitchen of the Sigma house, absolutely wasted at the celebration party the frat is throwing in honor of Mingyu being crowned the best frat star on campus. Between the blunt that you, Mingyu, Minghao, and Seokmin, another friend in your year, had passed around upstairs, and all the shots that Mingyu had plied you with, you’re feeling weirdly bouncy and giggly and not entirely sure if you’ll remember this the next morning.
“Okay, so,” Mingyu mumbles, pulling you closer as the two of you nestle in a corner, away from whatever is going on at the beer pong table, “we should stage a breakup, right?”
You giggle against the hollow of his throat, arms looped over his shoulders. “Can we make it your fault?”
He whines like a kicked puppy. “Why can’t we make it mutual? Jeonghan would kick my ass.”
“Fine, fine,” you huff, not at all reluctant. “We should give it some time so it’s not suspicious, right?”
“Yeah.” Mingyu nods, accidentally knocking his chin against your forehead. “You’re so smart.”
“Which means I’m still on girlfriend duty tonight,” you conclude.
“Oh, come on.” Mingyu’s hands come down to rest at your waist, his fingertips skimming along the waistband of your skirt, eliciting a shiver from you when you feel his rough, warm skin against yours. “You make it sound like a chore.”
You sigh. Oh well, you could do much worse than Mingyu.
You’re not sure if it’s the weed or the alcohol, or maybe just jealousy at this fake version of yourself that’s happy with a boyfriend and not moping over an unrequited crush on your childhood best friend, but you find it strangely easy to lean up and attach your lips to Mingyu’s, feel the wet heat of his tongue in your mouth. and Mingyu, pliant under your grip as always, kisses you back, going along with it without a second thought.
“No offense,” he pants as he parts from you, “but I don’t think I want to hook up with you.”
You blink at him. “Do you want me to leave?”
“No, no,” he clarifies quickly, “you’re a good kisser, I just don’t want things to be weird between us, which I think might happen if we hook up.”
“If fake dating didn’t make things weird, I’m not sure that hooking up would,” you laugh, more of a giggle than anything. You attach your lips to his jaw, pulling him down towards you so you don’t have to crane your neck. 
“And also,” he nudges at the hair behind your ear with his nose, “you’re like, totally wasted right now.”
“You’re not sober either,” you shoot back, accusatory.
“More sober than you,” he shoots back. He’s right, though. His large stature means that he can hold his liquor much better than you. “It wouldn’t be fair,” he pouts, stubborn, “and I’m not a creep.”
“Fine.” You tug lightly at the short hairs on the back of his head. 
“Are… are you okay?”
Mingyu’s question makes you hesitate for a moment. You lean your flushed cheek against the jut of his collarbone. “I’m drunk,” you respond flatly.
“No, not that, you’re just usually not this…” you feel Mingyu gulp, “clingy.”
You wonder if you should tell him about Wonwoo and your stupid pointless crush that’s starting to feel less like a crush every time you’re with him and more like… something deeper. Something frightening, like a yawning chasm, just waiting for you to fall in.
You’re saved the effort of further deliberation, however, when Mingyu suddenly raises his head and interrupts your thoughts. “Hey, isn’t that Wonwoo?”
You lift yourself off of Mingyu’s chest and look behind you. True to his word, it really is Wonwoo, standing by the door, jacket on, looking at you like a deer caught in the headlights. 
“Huh, he doesn’t usually come to these,” Mingyu observes, tugging idly at the bottom of your shirt. “I wonder why he’s here.”
You think you know why he’s here, though. Earlier, back upstairs, you had excused yourself to the bathroom to take a quick breather. Through an alcohol and weed induced haze, you had belatedly realized that it’s Friday night, and you’re late.
you: cn you come pick me u you: at sigma wonu: are you ok? i’ll be there in a few you: sry im drunk you: wanna go home w u
Now, staring Wonwoo dead in the eyes, you realize with a jolt that you had never told him why you asked him to pick you up. You peel yourself off your fake boyfriend and stumble, clumsily, towards Wonwoo, trying your best to ignore the way the room spins around you.
“Wonu,” you whine reaching out to him.
He frowns. “Are you okay? What’s happening?”
“I’m drunk,” you tell him.
“I know.” He extends his arm and lets you cling on to him as you stumble into his torso.
“And it’s Friday night,” you look up at him.
“Yes.”
“We’re supposed to be playing Overwatch together.” You give him the best puppy eyes you can muster, and he blinks at you, looking flustered.
“Huh?”
“Overwatch,” you insist, tugging him towards the door. “Friday night. It’s Wonwoo and Y/N night.”
“Is… is this what you called me over here for?”
You nod and begin dragging Wonwoo out by the wrist. 
The cool air outside hits your flushed skin like a wave, like you’re jumping into a pool. Wonwoo is silent and lets you continue to cling onto him as he walks you to where he had parked on the side of the street, directly under a streetlight.
You slide into the passenger seat. Wonwoo hands you a bottle of water, cap already removed for you. “Hydrate,” he orders. 
“Sorry,” you whimper, somewhat pathetically.
He frowns. “Why are you apologizing?”
“I must be so annoying,” you mumble, feeling tears welling up in your eyes.
“No,” Wonwoo reaches out and takes your hand over the center console. “You’re not annoying.”
You watch him as he drives. He’s so handsome, your alcohol-addled mind supplies. 
“You don’t think I’m annoying?”
“Never.”
Wonwoo says it like a promise.
Silence falls over the two of you as he drives through campus, all the way back to the student housing unit that both of you live in. He turns off the engine, leaving a silence that feels even more all-encompassing. He looks over at you, face half hidden in the shadows and half illuminated by the orange lamplight outside. “Is Minghao home?”
“N…no, he’s back at the party.”
“Okay, we’re going back to my apartment, then,” he decides.
You blink. “Huh?” But you’re already stumbling out of his car and spilling onto the sidewalk, all wobbly legs and loose limbs. 
“I’m taking you back to my place,” Wonwoo repeats. “You need someone to watch you and make sure you don’t wander off and get lost in the city,” he explains drily.
“‘M okay,” you whine futilely. It’s especially unconvincing, since you’re still stumbling over your own feet and leaning against him. 
Wonwoo lets you rest your cheek on his shoulder and cling onto him as he lets you into his apartment, gets you a glass of water, and digs up a pack of makeup wipes from out of nowhere and sits you on his bed and starts to get to work. 
A small (very drunk) part of you bristles at the appearance of the makeup wipes, and you try to scowl, even as Wonwoo gently wipes at your smudged eyeliner. “Whose are these? Do you have a lot of girls over here or something?”
“They’re Junhui’s, he uses them,” Wonwoo explains. He dabs at one last spot in the corner of your right eye, then announces, “there, you’re all done.”
You open your eyes to see Wonwoo grinning dopily at you. “You’re cute,” you poke at his cheek, and he laughs quietly. Seokmin used to be afraid of him, he had confessed to you, and you wonder why, because the Wonwoo you know is so soft, so loveable, so goofy and cute. 
The Wonwoo you know is shy and awkward and doesn’t quite know how to fit himself into social situations. He’s clumsy and absentminded and needs someone to take care of him, to dote on him and give him attention.
The Wonwoo that you know, you’ve known since you were in second grade, standing over the boy you had knocked over with a rubber kickball, staring at him as he sniffled on the woodchips and glared at you through big watery eyes. That day, you decided right then and there that this boy would be yours, and now…
“Wonwoo,” you blurt out without thinking, “I’m in love with you.”
His breath catches. Wonwoo pauses, digesting your clumsily delivered confession, and then he makes the most awful expression you have ever seen on him.
It’s raw hurt, sharp, painful. His mouth twists and his brows furrow and he looks at you like you’re something to be afraid of. You hate it. You hate that you’re the cause of it, that he’s feeling this, whatever it is, because of you, even though you’re not sure why.
“Really,” you insist. You reach out to grab his hand, but he pulls away from you. “It’s true. I’m in love with you.”
You hear a sharp intake of breath. “You’re not,” he says. “You’re in love with Mingyu. You’re happy with him.”
“I’m not… I’m not in love with him,” you try to explain, but your liquor-numbed lips are clumsy and you trip over your words. You lean towards him, slanting your face up, because you want to kiss him so badly it’s all you can think of. Wonwoo shoves you back, hard. 
“Don’t,” he bites, voice sharp and tense.
“I’m in love with you,” you repeat, reaching out to him, but he pushes your hand back and steps away. Like he’s afraid of you.
“Don’t do it. You’re drunk.” His voice wavers slightly. “Don’t do something you’ll regret tomorrow.”
You shake your head, but Wonwoo looks at you with so much hurt and confusion in his eyes, you can’t bring yourself to argue. “Wonu,” you whisper, reaching out to rest your fingertips on his wrist, “please don’t cry.”
He takes a long, shuddering breath, eyes closed, and then when he exhales and opens his eyes again, his expression is impassive. Unreadable.
“Go to sleep,” he says flatly. “Tomorrow you’ll wake up and go back to your boyfriend, and you’ll be happy that nothing happened tonight.”
He closes the door to his bedroom, leaving you in the darkness.
(Wonwoo is cold.
He’s always a little cold, but in his haste to escape earlier, he hadn’t gotten a blanket or even changed into sweats before closing the door behind him, and now Wonwoo lays on the couch, his feet hanging over the armrest, staring at the ceiling. 
I’m in love with you, your voice rings in his head. Wonwoo’s cheek still burns where you had gently rested your hand earlier. If he hadn’t known any better, Wonwoo might have believed you and given in to his most guilty, far-off fantasy, the one where you love him back.
But Wonwoo does know better. He saw the way you were draped all over Mingyu at the party, the way you giggled into his neck when Mingyu slipped his fingertips under the him of your shirt. Mingyu is good for you, Wonwoo decides. Like you, Mingyu is bright and out-going, popular, well-liked, good at receiving love and gives it readily in return. 
Wonwoo closes his eyes, tries to push away the memory of your body curled into his, and wills his mind into silence so that maybe he can get some sleep tonight.)
You wake up, nauseous and hung over and feeling not at all rested, in Wonwoo’s bed.
Groaning, you swipe at your face, expecting to see a gloopy mess on your fingers, but your makeup has already been removed. You squint at the dim sunlight streaming in through the closed blinds, and you reach around blindly until your fingers close around your phone. 
There’s a smattering of random social media notifications and updates from group chats, but one notification in particular catches your eye.
wonu: i’m outside wonu: where are you? are you ok? wonu: i’m gonna head inside to look for you
You feel your cheeks flush as the memories come trickling back– your drunk texts, insisting that your best friend picks you up, kissing Mingyu, leaving the party with Wonwoo, clinging on to him like a koala…
Gathering your courage and steeling your woozy stomach, you stumble out of bed and throw open the door, poking your head out. Wonwoo is sprawled across the couch, undoubtedly playing some kind of mobile game, when he looks up at you. His hair is sticking up in every possible direction and his shirt is crumpled. “Hi,” he says, expression impossibly neutral.
“Hi,” you grin, waving lamely. “I feel like shit. I didn’t say anything weird or embarrassing last night, did I?”
He raises an eyebrow at you. “You don’t remember?”
You shake your head. “I remember you picking me up from the frat, I think.”
For a split second, he looks relieved. Then, he puts his phone down and laughs at you. “You didn’t do anything embarrassing,” he grins, “except for abandoning your boyfriend at the party because you wanted to play Overwatch with me. C’mon, do you want to get brunch?”
You press your palms against your throbbing forehead. Your brain hurts, and you’re almost sure you half-remember telling Wonwoo that you’re in love with him, but Wonwoo is looking at you expectantly and you’d like nothing more than some french toast and a hot coffee right now, so you shrug. “Sure, lemme wash up and get changed in my apartment first.”
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“Dear Cherry, my friend is hopelessly in love with his childhood best friend, who is currently dating a hot frat dude. Should he just give up? The moping is starting to bum me out and I’m worried my hair is going to fall out. Love, Wen Junhui.”
You wrinkle your nose at the message. “And has anybody ever told Junhui that the whole point of anonymous submissions is defeated when he signs his messages with his full name?”
Minghao looks up from the canvas he’s busy splattering paint on. It’s his semester final project, and you had promised to accompany him in the basement of the fine arts building as he works.
Instead of answering, he looks at you like you’re the densest human he’s ever had the misfortune of meeting. “Maybe he’s not trying to be anonymous. Maybe he’s trying to complain about someone we know.”
You squint at your laptop screen. “Who is this supposed to be about, anyways?”
This time, Minghao actually rolls his eyes at you. “Whatever. Have you broken up with Mingyu yet?”
“Yeah, we broke up two days ago. It was mutual, because Mingyu was genuinely afraid that Jeonghan would kick his ass if we said we broke up with me.”
The two of you had made a whole show of deleting all your carefully staged couple photos off your social media accounts, and then unfollowing and refollowing each other within the span of two days, because as the story goes, you and Mingyu had talked it over and are better as friends than as a couple.
“That’s nice,” Minghao says. He unscrews a jar of turpentine and starts to clean off his brushes. “Maybe you should respond to Junhui’s advice submission.”
You groan. “I’ll just tell him to tell his friend to get over it,” you scowl.
“By the way, what’s wrong with Wonwoo?”
“What do you mean?” You look up. Minghao is now attacking the canvas with a palette knife, carving some dramatic impasto into the paint.
“The last two times all of us hung out together, he’s been all…weird.” Minghao wrinkles his nose. “It’s like he’s some kind of guilty dog. He stares at you when you’re not looking, and then he looks away when you are.”
You chew on your lip, work now long forgotten on your idle laptop. Minghao is right. Wonwoo has been different, but not… different. He’s as unwaveringly weird as always, and he’s been texting you links to youtube cat videos and starting arguments on video game theories as always, but it feels like Wonwoo has been aggressively normal. Like how best friends are supposed to be. Light and easy.
“I don’t know. I feel like he’s been acting weird these days too, but I can’t figure out how.”
“You should talk to him,” Minghao says, like talking to Wonwoo about his feelings is easy or something. Or like talking about your own feelings is easy.  
“Or maybe I shouldn’t,” you sigh. Whatever is going on with Wonwoo, you’re just glad he still wants to hang out with you. You’re not entirely sure what you even did wrong, but you’d be willing to beg on your hands and knees for him to forgive you and to stick by your side. “Whatever. We’re gaming together this Friday, I’ll think about it then, I guess.”
.
.
.
“Wonu, I’m scared,” you whine into the mic. It’s another Friday night and the two of you are playing PUBG again. You’re in the endgame now– the original 100 has been whittled down to just 5 players remaining, including you but not including Wonwoo, who had been killed earlier and is now spectating you in-game like some sort of ghost. 
“Just sit tight,” he instructs. In your mind’s eye, he’s leaning back in his gaming chair, arms crossed as he observes your gameplay. 
“There’s gunshots,” you complain, “North? I think they’re hiding by those rocks. It sounds like they’ve got a good sniper rifle, too.”
“They don’t know you’re there. Just let the other teams fight it out. You have enough ammo?”
You huff. “I have like, twelve shotgun shells.”
“And you have the location advantage. Just sit and wait for now.”
You sigh, aimlessly panning the camera back and forth in your anxiety. “Fine,” you agree, because despite it all, Wonwoo is still better at this game than you are, and because you trust him. 
Seconds pass. The audio of distant gunfire in crisp surround sound keeps you on edge and tense, so that when you hear Soonyoung, one of Wonwoo’s roommates, you nearly jump out of your skin. 
“Hey, are you busy?”
“Yeah,” Wonwoo replies. His voice is tinny and quiet, but still clear, like he’s slipped his headset off and mic is pushed away. “I’m gaming with Y/N. I’m muted, don’t worry.”
You’re about to shout and let him know that he’s not actually muted, but your curiosity gets the better of you when you hear Soonyoung’s next words:
“Right, speaking of Y/N, that reminds me. Did you hear that Y/N and Mingyu broke up?”
“Oh.” There’s a pause, and then you hear Wonwoo ask, “why?”
“Dunno. Mingyu wouldn’t give me any details. He said something lame, like that they’re better off as friends, or something.”
“Oh. When did this happen?”
“I think on Wednesday? At least that’s what Seungkwan told me.”
“Hm.”
“Anyways, isn’t that great? You can finally shoot your shot!”
“Are you insane, Soonyoung? It’s been less than a week!”
“Well, okay, fair. But next week? She didn’t seem too sad about it in class today.”
“That’s because she was in class. And anyways, this doesn’t change anything between us, so I’m not going to do anything either.”
“Are you kidding me? So you’re just going to keep it a secret forever?”
“Yeah. I’ll die before I tell Y/N that I’m in love with her.”
Oh.
You sit at your desk, staring at your monitor but not seeing anything. Very quietly, you press your fingers against your lips, as hard as you can, and feel the blood rushing past your ears. 
“I’m not going to ruin our friendship over nothing,” Wonwoo continues.
“It’s not nothing,” Soonyoung replies with a pout in his voice. “You’ve been in love with her for years. Since high school, at least.”
“She just sees me as a friend, that’s all,” Wonwoo sighs. 
Since high school. He’s loved you since high school.
You remember the way he looked at you after prom when he was dropping you back off at home. You had gone with him because the boy you wanted to ask you, some boring soccer player, had asked your friend instead, and Jaehyun had already asked (and been rejected by you) twice, and nobody else had asked you to be their prom date. And Wonwoo, awkward and quiet as he was, had fully expected to skip prom completely, but three days before you had shown up at his locker after school, desperate because you already had a dress and a group to go with and tickets but no date, practically begging him to go to prom with you. And without even thinking, Wonwoo had agreed.
That night, when he drive you home, you leaned your head against the car door with the windows rolled down and felt the wind on your face. At the end, when he parked his car on the side of the street in front of your childhood home, you looked over at him and told him. “I’m so glad we’re going to college together, Wonwoo. I want to be with you forever.”
And he had watched you as you said it, quiet, like he was breathless. Like you had said something terrible and incredible at the same time. 
It’s always been Wonwoo beside you, lazy summers spent playing video games, late night phone calls where you’d talk and he’d listen, after class in his car listening to the radio and eating junk food. Had he loved you then? With ketchup on your shirt and acne across your face and poorly box-dyed hair? And had you loved him then too? Before you even knew what love is?
The weight of it is heavy, settling in your stomach like a hot stone. It almost hurts, how much you feel.
You’re interrupted by a very loud spate of gunfire piercing your eardrums and making you jump,  shrieking loudly as you’re killed in-game. Onscreen, your bloodied character rolls limply down the hill as “Better luck next time! #2/48” flashes on top of your game stats.
“Aw, second place, so close,” you hear Wonwoo say. Then he pauses. “Wait. Was I not muted just now?”
“Wonwoo, I’m going downstairs,” you tell him.
“Wait–” his voice is tight and panicked, but you’re already tugging your headset off and grabbing your keys.
You nearly avoid tripping over your feet as you run to the stairwell at the end of the hall and fly down the two flights of stairs, to where Wonwoo is. By the time you’re banging at their door, you’re out of breath and flushed. You’re not sure if the pounding of your heart is from the exertion or if it’s from something else. Anxiety, maybe. Fear. Exhilaration.
Wonwoo answers the door. He looks exactly like you’d expect, with his rumpled tee shirt and sweatpants and bare feet, his glasses on and his bangs pushed back with the bunny shower headband you bought for him last year.
“Hi,” you grin breathlessly at him.
“Hi,” he replies.
“Can I come in?”
He takes a deep breath, like he’s steeling his nerves. “Yeah.” He opens the door wider and steps aside to let you in, and you follow Wonwoo to his room.
It’s dimly lit with the rainbow glow of his gaming setup and the ready screen for PUBG still up on one of his monitors. Wonwoo flicks on the overhead light, which throws the room into sharp relief. The sudden brightness makes everything feel more real, somehow. 
You sit on the edge of Wonwoo’s bed and pat the spot net to you, which he takes. “Wonwoo,” you say.
Wonwoo purses his lips. “How much of that did you hear earlier?”
“All of it,” you chew the inside of your cheek, drumming your fingers against the bedspread. 
“I’m sorry,” he blurts out. “You can pretend I didn’t say any of that.”
“Did you mean it?”
“Huh?” He stares at you with wide eyes.
“What you said earlier.” You pick at a loose thread poking from the hem of your shirt. “Did you mean it when you said you’re in love with me?”
He hesitates, frowning as a conflicted expression briefly flashes across his face, eyebrows drawing together. 
“Wonwoo?” You call his name gently to get his attention. “I’m in love with you too, Wonwoo.”
“I–what?” Wonwoo looks at you like you’ve brown another head. “But, you...  Mingyu?”
You furrow your brows at him. “Mingyu? Didn’t I tell you? We were just faking so he could win that Greek God competition and get free parking next semester.”
“Wait,” he sputters, “so all of that was fake? You were just pretending to be in a relationship?”
“Yeah. I don’t care about Mingyu, I have feelings for you, Wonwoo.”
“You.” Wonwoo takes a deep breath. “You didn’t tell me.”
“I did!” You widen your eyes, adamant. “At karaoke back in October. You, me, Minghao, and Junhui?” It had been after a particularly grueling set of midterms, and the four of you had gone out for some korean barbeque, followed by boba and an extended noraebang session. While Junhui was crooning to an old Cantonese ballad, you were squished on a couch with Minghao and Wonwoo, and the three of you were talking idly about Junhui’s most recent date.
It’s funny, you remember turning and mumbling to Wonwoo, did I ever tell you that Mingyu and I are faking our whole relationship for clout? But Wonwoo hadn’t responded, so you assumed that he didn’t care. Now, it’s looking more like he didn’t even hear you.
“I was asleep,” Wonwoo states in flat disbelief.
“You were asleep,” you repeat slowly.
“It was dark and I was tired. You didn’t notice that I passed out as soon as we dimmed the lights?” He raises his eyebrows as he defends himself, and you bury your face in your hands.
Click. The pieces are all falling in place.
“Wonwoo. I’m so dumb,” you moan. “I run the Ask Cherry column. All those messages from Junhui and Soonyoung. They were about you, weren’t they?”
“Messages? There were more after the first one?!”
“And they were about you being in love with me,” you recall. “This whole time, I thought you liked someone else. Someone who isn’t me.”
There’s a pause. You can hear the sound of Wonwoo’s PC whirring in the background. And then, Wonwoo starts laughing, choked and quiet at first, and then loud, incredulous, almost.
“God,” he gasps between laughs, “we’re both so, so stupid.” And then you’re laughing too.
In retrospect, it’s all ridiculous, this entire situation. You collapse back onto Wonwoo’s bed and laugh until your ribs hurt, and when you turn your head to the side, there’s Wonwoo laying beside you, glasses askew, grinning.
You giggle and reach out to straighten his glasses. “Hi,” you say to him.
“Hi,” he says back, getting up to lean on one elbow. “I’m in love with you, Y/N.”
You feel your smile widen so much, your cheeks hurt. “I’m in love with you, Jeon Wonwoo.”
He looks at you with so much fondness, it takes your breath away. It’s the way he’s always looked at you, you realize, since the two of you weren’t much more than a pair of kids.
“So, now what?”
“Hmm.” You pretend to think. “Can you kiss me about it, then?”
Wonwoo nods, and his hair flops over the bunny headband as he moves his head. “Yeah,” he says, “I think I can do that.”
.
.
.
(Afterwards, a lot less changes with your relationship with Wonwoo than you thought. After all, he was your best friend for much, much longer than he’s been your boyfriend. He still sends you cat videos at strange hours of the night, and he still sticks sullenly by your side during social outings. Friday nights are still game nights, of course, but now it’s mostly spent on your shared Stardew Valley co-op or cuddling in bed while playing Pokemon together. 
But one thing that changes is the kisses. You kiss Wonwoo whenever you can, because you have so much love to give him and not enough time in the day to tell him all the ways you love him. You try, though, to tell him every moment you can that he’s the cutest, smartest, sweetest, kindest, funniest boy in the world, and that he’s the best friend and boyfriend you could ever ask for.
Wonwoo has a harder time with his feelings, but you know, even without saying. It’s in the way that his fingers linger over your hand when he drops you off in front of your classroom, and the way he gives you first pick on all the best loot when you’re gaming together. And when it’s really late at night and the two of you are huddled under the blankets together, listening to the way your heartbeats collide, he whispers it too. “I love you.”
And, Minghao finally admits it. “Fine,” he grumbles reluctantly while the two of you are preparing the upcoming edition of Ask Cherry, “maybe you’re qualified to give love advice after all.”)
2K notes · View notes
maplesyrupsainz · 3 months ago
Text
˖⁺。˚⋆˙xo xo | MS47˖⁺。˚⋆˙
pairing: mick schumacher x fem y/n reader (she/her)
genre: social media au, established relationship
warnings: none jus fluffy
summary: in which your boyfriend finds himself explaining your knack for seeming nonchalant when in reality you just value your privacy, or in which your boyfriend is a lovesick puppy at your side and his fans have a lot of questions about you 🥹💋
a/n: i hope i did this req justice!!!! not sure if i got the idea right but hopefully i did i loved writing it!!! my first ever fanfic for mick too!!!
request!!!: could you do a smau for Mick where he's dating a girl completely opposed to him, not gothic but more of a golden retriever x black cat relationship
my masterlist
fc: various blonde girls from pinterest
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twitter ->
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instagram ->
mickschumacher 📍 australia
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liked by georgerussell63, lewishamilton, and others
mickschumacher a lil boat day with the love of my life ❤️
tagged: yourusername
view all comments
user2 AWWWWW
user3 he's always so sweet im obsessed
user4 me when
user5 y/n is so lucky
user6 everyone's fav golden retriever bf
lilymhe gorgeous couple 😘
liked by mickschumacher
georgerussell63 thanks for inviting us!! 🤔
mickschumacher sorry. y/n said she couldn't be bothered socialising
georgerussell63 sounds like her
yourusername get over it
user7 LOL there they go again
user8 opposites attract 😭
yourusername 💓
liked by mickschumacher
user9 a girl of few words
user10 wish i was cool & mysterious like y/n but instead im a yapper with adhd 😂
user11 this is so real
mickschumacher you can say that again
user12 MICK??? LMAOOO
user13 💀
yourusername 📍 australia
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liked by mickschumacher, carmenmmundt, and others
yourusername ⛴️
view all comments
lewishamilton come visit us after the summer break y/n
yourusername maybe
user14 no fr we need her back in the paddock already
user15 LOL lewis is like ussss
user16 begging for y/n's attention
user17 go girl give us nothing
liked by yourusername
user18 she liked this 😂
user19 self aware queen
user20 y/n my fav wag unbothered queen always
mickschumacher love you so much gorgeous
yourusername mwah 💋
user21 at least mick is in this post
user22 barely
yourbff witwoo look at uuu 👀
liked by yourusername
carmenmmundt missing you!!
liked by yourusername
user23 her barely ever replying is real as hell
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername posted a story
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liked by yourbff, mickschumacher, and others
user29 mick bf content when?
yourbff TXT ME BACKKKK
yourusername srry i will noww
yourbff ever elusive y/n
user30 ily y/n
user31 in my city omg!??!
user32 i luv summer break content
user33 so influencer vibes
lewishamilton …day 10 of asking you to visit the team after summer break
mickschumacher posted a story
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liked by lewishamilton, lilymhe, and others
yourbff ur so whipped 💓
mickschumacher 🤷‍♀️🤩
user34 awww sooo cute
user35 once again the difference in stories 😂
user36 beautiful black cat y/n <3
liked by mickschumacher
mercedesamgf1 so gorgeous!
mickschumacher you're telling me
user37 rapunzel fr
yourusername 📍 nyc
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liked by mickschumacher, mercedesamgf1, and others
yourusername living out my serena van der woodsen fantasy… xo xo 💋
view all comments
user38 omg y/n i am obsessed with you
user39 😍😍😍😍😍😍
user40 omg? go off girl
user41 xoxo fr
mickschumacher insanely stunning 🤩
yourusername oh you 💋
user42 giggling & kicking my feet over them
user43 they're all i think about fr
lewishamilton …day 14 of asking you to visit the team after summer break
liked by yourusername, mickschumacher
user44 HAHAHAHAHA
user45 no way
user46 they're begging you y/n
mercedesamgf1 we second lewis!
user47 LOLLLL
user48 how is this reallll
user49 why does everyone love y/n 😭
user50 IKR!!! she's so private tbh we dont rly know her
user51 yah idgi at all
yourbff can i be ur blair waldorf 🥹
yourusername you already know!
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername posted a story
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liked by yourbff, mickschumacher, and others
user52 Y/N PLEASE
user53 not paris 😂
lewishamilton …day 31 of asking you to visit the team after summer break
user54 our unbothered queen
user55 0 fuck's given
user56 so beautiful <3
mickschumacher ❤️❤️
user57 i jus know lewis & merc in general r having a breakdown without her rn!
user58 free merc f1 team from the y/n drought 🙏
interview ->
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transcript: interviewer: i'm sure you've seen the discourse online about your partner, y/n… / mick: *laughs* we have seen it, yes. it's very endearing and i love that everyone wants to get to know her better! / m: she keeps herself to herself generally, we're very opposite in that way! i'm an extrovert and, well, she just isn't!
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername posted a story
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liked by mickschumacher, georgerussell63, and others
user67 y/n.
user68 where you going
lewishamilton wait… 👀
georgerussell63 🤨
mercedesamgf1 …see you soon?
mickschumacher ❤️
liked by yourusername
user69 next race queen? next race queen? next race queen?
user70 location reveal
user71 status update y/n
user72 leading us on much😆
mickschumacher posted a story
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liked by lewishamilton, carmenmmundt, and others
user73 OMGGG FINALLY?!
user74 omg? she's going to monza?
lewishamilton she's here? she's here? she's here?
mickschumacher yes but…
lewishamilton but what
mickschumacher can you & george remain calm and act normal please
lewishamilton excuse me. i always do but i cannot say the same for george
mickschumacher …riiiiiiiight
user75 YAYYYY
user76 sooo cute omg love u guys
mercedesamgf1 our lucky day!
liked by mickschumacher
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername posted a story
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liked by mercedesamgf1, mickschumacher, and others
user77 omg
user78 this is not a drill!!!!
user79 i know the merc team are buzzing
mercedesamgf1 😻
carmenmmundt finally!!!
user80 U LOOK SO GOOD!!!
user81 reppinnnn 🙏
user82 our fav girl fr
yourusername 📍 italy
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liked by mickschumacher, lilymhe, and others
yourusername that was fun
tagged: mickschumacher
view all comments
user83 omg bf mick
user84 she's listening to us 👀
lewishamilton so good to see you!
liked by yourusername
carmenmmundt beaut girl
yourusername ily
lilymhe 😻😻😻
liked by yourusername
yourbff the outfitttt 🔥
liked by yourusername
user85 we lysm y/n!!!
liked by yourusername
user86 HER LIKING!!
user87 i love seeing her posts she's so sweet
user88 omg this is adorable
user89 they deffo read our comments
user90 right!!! her giving us more insight into her life am i crazy?
yourusername i luv u guys 💋
user91 screaming
user92 omg 😭
mickschumacher my girl. i love you ❤️
yourusername 🥹🥹i love u
THE END 💙
983 notes · View notes
str4wkinzi · 1 year ago
Text
NSFW CONTENT! MINORS DONT INTERACT!!
Your teacher comes over to your desk, putting one hand on your shoulder.
“Stay after class today.”
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Teacher! fav x Reader :3 (comic said change it to any character)
COMIC’S BIRTHDAY BASH HERE!!
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You wait in your seat after class, watching everyone else pack up and leave. He goes over to the door, closing and locking it.
“Your grades have been.. low. Is anything wrong?” He questions as he comes over to your desk.
You say no. Well, you try to say no. You look at him staring into your soul with those eyes. He’s your teacher, you shouldn’t think like this!
He snaps his fingers in your face. When did he get so close? He leans down, he’s so close to your face.
“I think i know what the problem is..” he whispers to himself as he stands up. You don’t hear it.
“Is it me? Are you.. distracted by me?” He says.
You could barely count the number of no’s that left your lips. No. That’s a lie. He knows it. You know it. But maybe you can…
“Maybe i need to… teach you how to pay attention in class.”
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“You can suck cock better than that, sweetheart.” He groans with a slight chuckle.
You never thought you’d be sucking your teachers cock. Well, you thought about it, but who thought it would actually happen?
With his eyes burning into your helpless state. Head bobbing on his cock as his hips meet your lips.
He stops you.
“What’s the answer to this?” He asks, coming out more like a demand than a question.
You hold your fingers up, ‘five.’
You see him smile and grab your hair, lifting your head off his cock.
“That was too easy for you. We both know you’re smarter than basic math, right?”
You nod shyly as you await his next set of words.
“Let’s give you a real challenge.”
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Bent over his desk, he asks you once more.
“Write down the fucking answer.” He demands between thrusts.
You write the answer on the paper, sloppily, but it’s there and its right. He chuckles and stops all movements.
“Answer this question correctly. This is the last one.”
You nod as you whine.
“Are you going to pay attention from now on?” He asks.
You nod frantically, practically breaking your neck trying too.
“Words.” Is all he says before he starts pounding to you. Your words get caught in your throat as he fucks them out of you.
Shaking, moaning, dripping mess. You yell ‘yes’ just as he hits your cervix.
“Yes what? What are you saying yes for?” He chuckles as his thrusts get harder.
You angrily whine and try to mutter out a slur of words.
“I can’t hear you, sweetheart.”
Fuck, he’s driving you insane.
“Yes, i’ll pay attention in class from now on.”
You wish it came out like that. It came out shaky and full of desperate moans. You could barely comprehend your own sentence.
“I’ll let you off easy this time.” He whispers in your ear as he thrusts impossibly harder then before.
Moans, groans, and lewd slapping fill the classroom. What if someone came back to get something they forgot?
A student and a teacher, fucking right over his desk. What if somebody heard your loud moans through the door?
Those are the thoughts you would be having if you weren’t so fucked out right now.
When you both eventually cum he helps you put all your clothes that he ripped off on.
He helps you walk out of the school and into his car. Along the way, you ask him where you two are going.
“Private lessons, of course. I’ll call your parents and say you needed them.”
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STR4WZ STICKY NOTE < guys ive been going crazy.. imagine crying while writing smut its a really good experience - STR4WKINZI anyways everything is going out in the next 4-3 days (hopefully) cuz im not busy :3 except school ofc BYE I LOVE YOU GUYS 3
923 notes · View notes
the-s1lly-corner · 6 months ago
Text
Sleepover w/ the digital circus cast
been a while since ive written this style of post for tadc, but im on my computer again so hopefully writing so much wont be too grating! reminder that i do not currently take requests for the entire cast in one post-
notes: reader is gn, not really romantic, written with the idea that everyone is having a sleepover in the main area of the circus
cws: bugs
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caine
does not sleep but he wants to feel included, hes the one providing the games and activities for the night, as well as bedding for everyone to use
pretends to sleep, probably totally incapable of sleeping unlike the circus members... fake snores to try to sell it and make it convincing but all it does is it keeps everyone else awake
the games mentioned are usually an exaggerated and insane version of them- truth or dare but if you lie or refuse a dare you were given you get locked in the cellar/j
oh he definitely would try to get some juicy conversation with you or another circus member- god forbid you show some small sign that youre crushing on someone, hes not going to leave you alone
even worse if he finds out you actually do and who it is
his version of spin the bottle might get a little insane, knowing him.. definitely rigs it lands on whoever you like
pomni
not very interested, but if this takes place post episode 2 shes more inclined to join everyone for the night to get to know everyone better
if you two have grown close she sticks with you during the insane games caine has set out
completely opts out of any games that look way too intense but she probably gets roped into it by some of the others- or simply being swept into the chaos
sleeps off to the corner a bit away from everyone else so she can at least try to get a good nights sleep
if SOMEONE (jax, or even caine) gets too overwhelming or annoying she just gets up and goes to her room... you might be able to coax her back out
ragatha
as mentioned in jax's section, she offers to let you lay next to her if jax is bothering you
if you ask her, she does your hair before you go to bed. brushing through it and if its long enough she ties/braids it up for you
if you have a sleep set- unlikely given that they cant take their clothes off but we can pretend caine snapped his fingers and changed everyones clothing or something- she compliments how it looks.. if its cute or if it looks comfortable
if youre still awake and open to it she talks to you quietly when she cant sleep, its actually a nice change of pace against the chaos of when everyone else was awake
you dont talk about much, you just check in on each other and ramble about nothing in specific... keep it down or caine will come on over and try to insert himself
jax
hes the reason the cw is here, hes going to put bugs in your blankets if you guys arent sharing his room. if the two of you are in your room, or if you guys are in the common area hes going to do it.. or put something else thats unpleasant there..
thinks its funny, knowing him he might actually laugh a little off to the side as you thrash your sleeping bag around
snack hoarder, especially if theres candy- good luck trying to get more than a handful from him, hes not much of a sharer
tries to play everything off when someone offers to let you come lay down next to them for the night- likely ragatha
tells the most grotequse and horrifying stories before everyone else goes to sleep
"first person game mcs dont blink" is said as everyone is trying to unwind or something along those lines
kinger
has the softest and comfiest pillows and blankets, from his fort of course! likely sleeps in it rather than out and exposed on the floor with everyone else
makes it a little larger so you can crawl inside with him- its a lot calmer in here than anything thats happening out there
small talk, you both talk about your interests though due to kingers nature the conversation bounces around a lot
he doesnt participate in the games for the most part, especially if its after a high energy adventure... hes a little drained after the day- physically and mentally
sleeps with at least an arms length of space between the two of you unless you tell him youre comfortable with him being closer
dad snores
zooble
not very interested, probably stays in their room for most of the night if not the entire night
if theyre around when jax is telling scary stories they just roll their eyes... theyve heard worse
zooble being a horror/disturbing media fan headcanon my beloved, they probably try to one up him... though theyre not taking it very seriously. theyre not all that interested in winning, but jax is and hes going to get annoying
if they go out and interact with everyone else, theyll go to their room when theyre ready to sleep. they dont want to sleep on the floor in some sleeping bag.. offers to walk you to your room if the horror talk got to you
gangle
sits in her own corner doing her own thing, you can convince her to join in on the more tame games if you promise to stick with her
sticks around with you after that but like... lingering to the side, not really glued to your side because she doesnt want to invade your personal space or make you feel uncomfortable
very quiet if you offer to let her lay down next to her in the night
its a little less awkward if her comedy mask isnt broken but knowing how fragile it is, its unlikely
refuses to participate in any games like 2 truths 1 lie or truth or dare- she just knows jax is going to hang whatever she says over her head even if hes not the one asking her questions
132 notes · View notes
ot3 · 4 months ago
Note
Hey! The link to your FAQ wasn't working for me so I don't know if this question has been asked before. I really appreciate your perspectives on AI art. Do you happen to have any resources that you read/listened to on intellectual property rights and the issues with it? I just don't really know where to start with it.
[heres where i cut out a big paragraph of me, once again, bitching about how blog pages don't work on the tumblr app and i think that's fucking stupid]
anyway i dont have any generalized sources on the subject but the tl;dr of it is: intellectual property rights exclusively benefit people who have the resources to pursue sustained litigation. 99% of the time, what IP law is being used for is to reinforce corporate ownership of work that was done by their employees.
the whole disco elysium debacle is a great case study.
The shareholders of ZA/UM accused the trio of, among other things, intending to steal intellectual property (IP) from the company — a curious accusation, considering that the world of the game is based off of a novel written by Kurvitz himself. The case of Disco Elysium illustrates the shortcomings of IP rights as protection for artists. Consequently, it contains a lot of lessons for the labor movement when it comes to the arts, and serves as a reminder that creative workers are, at the end of the day, workers. But this is not just an academic exercise. It’s a human story about the intimate consequences of capitalist exploitation. “I got my soul ripped out of me,” Kurvitz told me over Zoom in April of 2023. “I got my skull cracked open and my brain lifted out of it by a fifty-five-year-old financial criminal.”
another example: alex norris of webcomic name, which you will probably recognize when you see it, has been raising hundreds of thousands of dollars over the past several years to try and keep up with the protracted legal battle over maintaining ownership of his own work.
I have been fighting this case since 2019. It arose out of an agreement to make a boardgame based on my webcomic in 2017 but the publishing company has used this as an opportunity to take all of my intellectual property, and has even claimed ownership of Webcomic Name as a whole. I can't go into more detail here, but the details of the case are publicly available to read online.
Then, in a 2024 update:
I have essentially won the main case based on the decisions made last summer. The Judge has clearly stated that I own my comics, and that the other party has infringed on my copyright. It is not over yet, as there are still a few things that need to happen. Hopefully things will all be wrapped up this year. After 6 years of legal battling, I can’t wait to be free of all of this. Hopefully, this second case will backfire, and they will be sanctioned for filing it. But to get to that point requires a frustratingly large amount of work, time and money.
An interesting thing about both of these two specific instances is that they involve creators who had entire bodies of work produced around the specific IPs that were stolen from them before they even began partnering with corporate entities to produce works. which is insane! you can spend years writing novels, drawing comics, and if a company comes in with enough lawyers they can own those ideas.
this is pretty distinctly different to me than instances of work you do while being employed by a corporate entity being owned by that corporate entity, because at least you know what you're getting into there to some degree, but i still think that's bad too. consider stuff like the owl house and gravity falls, two disney shows made by people who very very clearly did not like working for disney. disney owns their ideas, their characters, their worlds, because that's the price you pay for having an animated show produced.
essentially it's very very clear upon even the slightest examination that intellectual property in no way exists to codify who the creator responsible for specific creative concepts or works is. it exists to turn nebulous things like 'ideas' into market commodities, and to funnel the profits made by the labor of individual artists and writers into corporate bank accounts.
the only person who has ever really benefited from IP law as an individual trying to lay claim to their own work is ken penders, who notoriously won his suit to have ownership of characters and storylines he created. heartbreaking: Worst Person You Know Gets An Unequivocally Deserved Legal W.
The comics continued under Flynn’s direction as if nothing happened, but things started looking grim in late 2012, when Archie suddenly fired its entire legal team. The company had been unable to produce Penders’ work-for-hire contract, which would have given control of his creations to Sega. Penders claimed the contract had never existed. A heavily circulated Tumblr post outlining the case (which has been corroborated as a reliable source by Penders) explains that while Archie did provide a photocopy of a contract allegedly signed by Penders in 1996, Penders claimed that the document was a forgery. That it was neither an original copy nor a contract from the beginning of the writer’s tenure at Archie meant that its validity was questionable. Making things worse, Archie couldn’t produce an original copy of any previous contributor’s contract, meaning that any writer or artist who had worked on the Archie Sonic line could potentially follow in Penders’s footsteps and reclaim their work. “So are you saying prior counsel blew it?” the presiding judge asked Archie counsel Joshua Paul in a May 2013 court session. His reply was unequivocal: “Absolutely, your Honor.”
So yeah. Owning the work you do as an artist is only something that happens when the people trying to profit off of it show unprecedented and staggering level of incompetence in their legal teams.
Then, alongside not owning the concepts and ideas you produce while working with corporate entities, there's the issue of NDA regarding specific pieces you've produced. This causes a LOT of trouble for freelance illustrators/character designers/concept artists, etc. Looking for work is very hard when the past three years of pieces you've drawn can't be added to your portfolio. Some people have password protected pages on their portfolios that they use for NDA work, but I believe the right to do this varies depending on your contract. I'm not 100% sure. In cases where the project you worked on eventually comes out, that's one thing, but there will be instances where the entire project gets canned after all the work is done, but is still under NDA so essentially all of your work has been taken from you, crumpled up into a ball by a studio executive, thrown in the trash can, and legally you are not allowed to go pick it out of the bin and try and flatten it out again.
This has all been pretty art-focused because that's the kind of circles I run in and where a lot of my interests lie but the truth is none of this is even remotely close to as evil IP law gets. I've saved the most egregious for last: The Lakota Language Consortium
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The Lakota Language Consortium had promised to preserve the tribe’s native language and had spent years gathering recordings of elders, including Taken Alive’s grandmother, to create a new, standardized Lakota dictionary and textbooks.  But when Taken Alive, 35, asked for copies, he was shocked to learn that the consortium, run by a white man, had copyrighted the language materials, which were based on generations of Lakota tradition. The traditional knowledge gathered from the tribe was now being sold back to it in the form of textbooks.
When you're in defense of IP law, this is what you're siding with. This is the rational endpoint of IP and it is neither a fluke nor an example of the concept being twisted against its original design. Art, culture, language, it belongs to whoever is most capable of turning it into a product. The economic incentives of producing and distributing arts and culture demand this is how things be.
Meya says his work is a vital tool in preserving the Lakota language, which did not previously have a standardized written form. He estimated that there are fewer than 1,500 fluent Lakota speakers left and that over the last decade and a half, the organization has helped add 50 to 100 more. “Just because money is involved in it does not inherently make it an evil thing,” Meya said in a recent interview with NBC News. Most of the products his organizations make are free, he said, but the cost of printing textbooks has to come from somewhere. “That tends to be sometimes part of the rhetoric, ‘Oh, there’s money involved. It must be, you know, part of the overall colonization effort.’ Well, you know, that’s just not realistic.”
Artists looking to force their way into the class of people who gets protected by these laws are not looking out for their community. They are not protecting anything but their own perceived financial interests. Intellectual property will never, ever benefit the most marginalized members of creative communities and anyone who tries to convince you otherwise is huffing some serious copium.
Frankly, I don't believe anyone can or should 'own' things like Ideas or Specific Aesthetic Flairs. But even if you do believe in that, IP law isn't the framework for handling it.
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tastesousweet · 9 months ago
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⭒ the girl with the tattoo (v) - pt 1 pt 2 p3 p4
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matt sturniolo x fem!oc / reader
summary : y/n and matt don't have to like each other to continue this thing of theirs, right?
warnings : implications of sex, alcohol, mention of weed, ???
mickey speaks : THANK U FOR THE LOVE ON THIS SERIES!!! sorry if this part feels shorter than the usual !! things get cute in next few parts...
THIS IS PART FIVE GO READ THE OTHERS FIRST OK
"SHE'S sick again?" remi asks, scooting herself further into the booth.
"yeah, i think it's her sinuses or something. she seemed pretty bummed about staying home, i feel awful." andrea pouts while glancing at the menu.
"she's the only person to ever be sick this often in june," remi giggles.
"we should order something to-go for her then. maybe soup?" erin suggests.
"that sounds nice, i'll text her- hopefully she's awake."
౨ৎ
"i can't keep telling my friends i'm sick." you huff as you walk back into your room to find matt redressing.
"why not?" his voice is muffled through his shirt as he tugs it over his head, leaving his hair ruffled.
you lay yourself on your bed lazily, "because they're smart enough to stop believing me soon."
"and why can't they just mind their business?" he looks over to you before reaching down to adjust the white shoes on his feet.
you stretch an arm out to grab your phone from your side table, mumbling, "you must not have friends who worry for you.”
he shakes his head then sighs, “sure, my friends care about me, but they also know when to leave me the fuck alone.”
“right, and my friends know me well enough to know i’m never asking to be left alone.” your comment comes out with more sass than you intended but you know he doesn't understand (or care to understand) your friendships enough to comment on them. then again, you were the one who brought this up in the first place.
"mmm...right. forgot you're just a little insane," he tsks, looking into your mirror and adjusting his shirt some more.
"shut up, matt," you continue staring at your phone, though it's only open to your home screen because you're far more engaged in the conversation than anything your phone could give you. "okay actually, what should i dooo?" you whine.
"i sure as hell won't know?!" his face twists up as he turns to look at you, "you're a smart girl, i'm sure you can figure it out."
you roll your eyes, "'kay... well maybe i've picked up a hobby...like, i dont know, painting! and i just really enjoy painting all alone, 'cause it helps me...focus?"
matt sarcastically laughs through his words, “you’re weird as shit,” he throws your plush throw blanket (that fell on the floor when you pushed matt on your bed just an hour ago) at you. “alright, i’m headin’ out.”
you don’t even give him a second look, “bye.”
౨ৎ
a few cheers of “ayy” and “look who made it” echo out from across the small alley as matt tucks his keys in his front pocket.
he looks over to see chris excitedly pointing at him with an arm hooked on nathan’s neck and another close friend, elijah, sitting on an oversized couch with a smile.
matt chuckles under his breath and walks closer to them, taking in the rowdy and neoned atmosphere of this downtown bowling alley. “what’s good?” he greets his group of friends.
“what’s good with you?” nathan counters with a grin as he moves to dap up matt.
matt shrugs into the handshake as eli begins to speak and stand up, “yeah, where the fuck are you comin' from?”
“home. don’t worry about it,” matt defends as his tongue guides over his hidden smile with a loose shrug of a shoulder.
“nooo! just say it how it is, matt,” chris says through a bite of nachos, “you slept in late and forgot about boys night, big fucking deal. you’re here now!” he throws his hands up before letting them fall to his sides dramatically.
matt slowly nods his head in sarcastic agreement as he faces his friends, "he's right."
he almost wants to laugh at the fact that chris actually believed his fake-sleeping enough to let him off the hook for "forgetting" their group hangout.
cameron wanders over to the group after taking his turn bowling, “‘kay, nate it’s your turn.” he then quips his chin up with a sudden grin, "hey, matt! about time you showed."
"better late than never," he breathes before joking, "you know i had to let you guys get at least a round in before i got here to start dominating."
“the word choice is a bit insane,” nick exaggerates as he approaches with arms full of bottled water and soda cans, "how about you go get your fucking shoes before you make that kind of claim." he moves around matt to place drinks on the coffee table (decorated with various bowling ball and pin themed clutter that made nick way to happy when first seeing it).
elijah places a hand on matt's shoulder, "i'll come with you, matt."
౨ৎ
"sick baby, i'm home nowww!" andrea yells from the front door.
you mentally gather yourself to continue your deception. you add weight to your eyelids, purposely making them droop and make your voice extra scratchy, as if you'd only just awoken.
andrea's at your door quickly, only tapping it slightly open, not wanting to blind you with the harsh yellowed lighting of the hallway. "hi, you up?"
you tussle under your comforter and give a small nod, "mhm."
"do you think you're like, contagious? i have your soup here and really wanna tell you some shit about tonight." she smiles warmly.
"no you're fine. please come in, i've been all alone and bored as hell," you rub your eye softly for effect.
you feel pretty guilty about this whole thing but you aren't hiding anything tragic from her. and this "illness" hasn't ruined that many hangouts...only the one's that happen to fall on days matt texts you.
"i hate to see my favorite bitch down like this, this soup better make you feel better immediately." she sighs as she comes into your room, noisy plastic bag in hand.
"i know," you lift yourself to sit up against your headboard as she sits next to you, "think i should be all better soon. i can't miss another shift at the bakery."
you were never missing work for matt, but to cover your ass you did miss a day or two of work to show your friends just how "sick" you were. if you were sick enough to stay home from work you surely were sick enough to avoid a girls night or two. but you guess it technically does come down to matt...unfortunately.
"yeah, i'm sure mr. houffman will lose it of you call off again," she giggles, sifting through the bag for your soup and silverware.
౨ৎ
barely a week later and you're feeling the best you have in a while, with the guilt of pretending to be sick no longer following you.
it's the fourth of july so there was absolutely no way you'd be continuing that act. you weren't missing out on a holiday with as many parties as this one.
and when chris asked andrea to get the girls to come party hop for the night, you told her yes immediately.
you're currently sat atop a random kitchen counter as nick moves around to make a concoction cocktail for you. you lean back on your hands to watch as he uses a knife to slice a small lime as garnish. "wow you really have an eye for this shit, nick," you laugh at his focused stare (he tries to compensate for any drinks he's had so far, not wanting to slice a finger off).
"i guess i'm just a natural!" he exclaims as he places the lime on the rim of the plastic cups, "okay, one for you," you take it from him, "and one for me." he grins at you.
"cheers!" you motion your drink towards him and he echoes you before you both take large sips.
your eyes pinch before they grow wide, "...why's it actually...good?" you laugh.
"you bitch! you thought i'd give you a shitty drink?!" he giggles and goes for another sip of his own.
"it's not that-"
you're cut off by matt's voice, "alright, time to dip. everyone's sayin' this place is really weird."
you both look over at him with his mellow attitude and perfectly organized outfit (so that he'd 'have all the colors but not look like a walking american flag'). "what? this place has been a good time so far! right, nick?"
"suppperrrr fun. maybe it's a you problem, matt." he jokes.
"come on, chris is the one who sent me to get you two. you know i would've left you both a few houses back." he teases.
you slide off of the counter easily, "okaaay," you look into his eyes and pat his chest twice mumbling, "someone needs a smoke break," before walking off in search of the door.
"wait y/n!" nick grabs a few sealed jello shots from an ice bucket nearby before rushing after you.
though he doesn't catch up to you before matt does, grabbing your hand, "you don't even know where the fuck you're going."
you breathe out defeated, "i'm sure i could've figured it out. i don't need you bossing me around."
matt pouts with squinted eyes and his head tilted, "sure."
nick comes up to you, continuing to stuff the shots into his jort pockets, "do these shorts make my ass look fat?" he turns to show you his side profile (already giggling before the punchline of his joke lands) that showcases the multiple items shoved into his back pockets and protrude out in awkward shapes.
you and nick both fall into a laughing fit and matt only ghosts a smile at his brother's stupidity before tugging your hand towards an exit. "wait! here, hold this please," you hand your drink to matt and reach your hand out for nick's. when he takes your hand willingly you raise your conjoined hands with a smile, "aw, we're like a little train!"
nick adds to the joke by pretending to be a conductor, exclaiming all the cliche lines he knows to make you laugh.
matt finally pushes a front door open, the warm summer air finally surrounding you once more. the rest of the group chatter along the sidewalk across the street. "my friends!" nick yells.
the three of you make your way down the wooden stairs (that seem to be steeper when going down than they were to walk up), and once you're in the grass your hand drops from matts's as nick drags you across the street quickly to crash into your friends.
remi's face is annoyed and confused at first but changes immediately when she recognizes your face. she throws her arms around you for a hug, "y/n! you were found!" you laugh into her neck as she sways back and forth.
"okay guys i'm thinking we hit up the place that the end of this block, right there. they've got some crazy lights goin' on so it should be fun." chris points in the direction and looks to the group for opinions.
"yeah! let's do it!" nate encourages.
the group begin to walk down the sidewalk (and slightly into the grass) lined with miniature american flags and past the many houses full of people and decorated with fairy lights and expensive garland.
naturally, everyone gravitates into cliques due to the amount of small conversations happening at once.
"that's unreal!" erin adds while hanging her arm on your shoulder, as you both listen to remi's dramatic retelling of some guy's awful flirting with her.
"i''m so over these trash ass men," remi shakes her head.
"tell me about it," erin sighs, rolling her eyes.
just as you begin to add your own opinion, matt taps your shoulder. he seems to always find a way to interrupt you. you glance behind you and see him holding your cocktail from earlier up.
"oh thanks, i forgot you had that," erin leans off of you to give you space to turn around and grab it.
though her eyes linger on matt for a second too long causing him to send her a smile and raise his eyebrows slightly in awkward question.
you feel the tension bite at the air around you and in hopes of escaping it, you turn back around and prompt remi with a new topic to discuss.
only, now you miss when erin gives matt a second glance back- and this time she offers a gentle wave and smile to him, in truce.
౨ৎ
after a few more stops at parties (you all got a little greedy about the free drinks and food which brought three extra "one more"s before deciding to cut it off), you all head to a nearby park to end the night with a firework show.
it was surprisingly well organized, with blankets already laid out around the large grassy area so that anyone could sit and watch whether they'd planned to or not.
the night has started to get the slightest bit cooler which was much needed after such an eventful three hours, leaving everyone exhausted in their comfortable spots; chris resting his head against andrea's full thighs, you next to her with your legs sprawled and arms extended behind you, nick and nathan both sat with their legs crossed, admiring the bright fireworks despite nick's flinching every-so-often.
the blanket next to you hosts erin, remi, matt, and cameron. all laying out as they laugh and talk, which you assume comes from a combination of the edibles they'd all taken at one of the parties and remi's addictingly outgoing nature that can force anyone to want to talk to her.
the booming fireworks go on for another twenty minutes before dying down and leaving the crowd in the dark, smokey air.
as you adjust to standing and take out your phone to use as a makeshift flashlight, you read the most recent of your many notifcations:
MATT - 12:36 AM
you down to paint after this???
you bite at your freshly chapped bottom lip before looking over to matt, who's currently using his hands obnoxiously to explain something he's clearly passionate about to cameron.
you sliently sigh before replying:
YOU -12:47 AM
sure
꩜⋆ ˚。⋆🎱˚
tag list (ily):
@rootbeerworshiper @deadxrx @breeloveschris @saintsturn @honestlybabymiracle @hearts4chris @starrysturniolo @blissfulbellss @aoxash
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emmyrosee · 1 year ago
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ABSJSNDSKDKSNDNDDJDJDBDIS I HAVE AN IDEA I WANNA SHARE WITH YOU SO BAD CAUSE I JUST KNOW YOU’D GO INSANE OVER IT WITH ME 👀
I was literally out shopping today and I was extremely lightheaded cause I needed water and this idea did NOT help with that as I was passing the men’s clothing section 🤨
but omg purposefully buying Osamu shirts every so often that are just slightly too small for him. namely compression shirts and t-shirts. I just really like his arms okay 😐? And he fully knows you’re doing it on purpose so you can admire him and he DOES NOT MIND ONE BIT. I fully believe his arms would be defined in a bulky SWEATER do u know how hard that is to do? he obviously doesn’t.
I love him ☹️
anon <3
DAWG THE WAY HE MAKES ME FROTH AT THE CHOMPERS AND BITES THE BARS IN MY CAGE-
just him coming home once upon a time to just merely pout about how the shirt he got is somehow too small for him, and you simply shrug and tell him to model it anyways because hey, he's too pretty to pout okay?
so he stalks into the bedroom, leaving you in the living room to wait for your man to show you where he wants to modify the fabric.
and then. OH AND THEN.
he comes around the hallway, cheeks a little warm from the effort of pulling the shirt over those massive shoulders and beefy arms and you know threads had to have been popped wildly just to get it over his head. AND DONT LOOK AT ME BUT I JUst find him super sinched at the waist, but a little soft near his tummy, which is even more shown from the tightness of the shirt.
"see?" he whines, pinching the shirt in his fingers. "it's too tight... i could never wear this out!"
meanwhile, you're not sure if you've ever been more attracted to him.
he just looks so big, so beefy and thick, you cant begin to try and pull your eyes off of him. he's so defined it hurts, and god you want to unhinge your jaw and bite that mammoth arm thats practically hulking from under the shirt.
"yeah shame you can only wear it here hey wow thats so funny you can only wear it here isnt that good though you always say how you need more lounge clothes-"
he quirks a brow, "are... you okay, babe? you’re talking really fast.”
You take a deep breath in and slowly let it out, flashing him the biggest set of flirt eyes you can muster, “you look really, really good, osamu.”
His brows raise. You nod.
“Like… really good?”
“Good enough where if you tried to return the shirt, I’d burn the receipt.”
“Okay, well don’t burn it,” he snickers, pulling you in for a hug. “We can just pretend like the shirt fits me perfectly and wear it.”
“You’re not wearing that outside.”
“Why?”
“Uh, because people will throw themselves at you? Duh?”
He offers you a laugh, clearly not taking into full account about how serious you are, but thats okay.
hopefully there wont come a day you have to show it.
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teabreakpancakes · 2 years ago
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hello!! i absolutely love your writing and cant get enough of it!! the fics with jack is so cute ;;!! is it okay if i request norton, jack, michiko, joseph (or anyone else!!) with an energetic s/o being able to shrink like the explorer and it gives them a heart attack like “oh my god where are they—WHERE-“ “STOP DONT JUMP OFF THE SHELF-“ “ARE YOU INSANE I NEARLY STEPPED ON YOU-“
Fun-Sized Ball Of Energy Norton, Jack, Michiko, Joseph, and Antonio with an Energetic S/O
Genre: Fluff
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𝐍𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐎𝐍 𝐂𝐀𝐌𝐏𝐁𝐄𝐋���
often times, he finds it hard to keep up with your energy
luckily, you like it when you're smaller, and it's much easier to catch you when you're smaller
"Not another peep out of you" the prospector chided, covering your mouth with his finger. You squirmed in his hand, attempting to break free, earning an eye roll from your lover, he had enough of your energy for today—he wasn't going to chase you around again.
he's considered purchasing a tiny bed for you, along with more tiny furniture
one time, the hunter almost stepped on you, but before they could, he pulled them away
oh boy, you were in for a scolding
"Idiot!" Norton yelled out, forcing the hunter to collide with the church's walls. He vaulted over the open window, picking you up with one of his hands before running off to the open exit gate. Onyx eyes glared daggers into your tiny form as you tried getting away from his sight, burrowing into yourself.
STOP HIDING FROM HIM, HE JUST WANTS TO TALK
Your heartbeat raced, not because of the hunter, but because of your lover. You pressed your body up against the kitchen island, hoping that he wouldn't see you at all costs. An angry Norton was a scary Norton after all.
"(Name) come out! i'm not that mad anymore, probably" he hollers, a somewhat eerie smile plastered on his handsome face. He roamed the halls, entering the kitchen. Where were the others you ask? well, they all had a match, you simply had to hide until your boyfriend hopefully stopped.
he's asked miss nightingale to design costumes and clothes for your tiny form despite knowing that your clothes will shrink down with you in matches
𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐑
he thinks it's pretty interesting, a pain in matches though
he likes putting you in his breast pocket
Jack hummed, roaming the manor with a small smile. He steps outside, taking a seat in the garden on one of the many garden benches. The smell of earth soothes you, coaxing you into leaning into the soft material of his suit.
He brings out a book, flipping it to where his bookmark was fixed at. Your arms hang outside his pocket, reading along with him and listening to his hushed voice. He truly was an excellent narrator.
please stop climbing up shelves or walls without him watching over you
"Dear!" the hunter exclaimed, visibly alarmed. You had almost fallen off the shelf you were climbing up. A small pout graced your face as he told you off, "I promise to not climb anything without you around, can I go now?" you whined, nearly laughing when he lets out an exasperated sigh at your antics.
he tends to caress you as if you're a little doll, you sure are as fragile as one
he likes dressing you in doll's clothes
"These types of clothes suit you" he crooned, smoothing over the fabric of the tiny apparel. He picked you up gently, placing you in front of his vanity mirror. You stared in awe—you truly did look like a tiny doll. "I look pretty" you whispered to yourself, bashfully twirling around in a small circle. Jack chuckled softly, "You always do darling" he spoke, smiling down at you.
you're so small he's actually afraid of accidentally crushing you
he asks you to be his muse often, your small size adds a touch of surrealism to his paintings after all (i'm well aware that surrealism began in the 20th century and that the ripper is from the 19th), roses held nothing against your beauty.
𝐆𝐄𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐀
she thinks you're even more adorable when you're tiny
she often worries about the chance of you getting hurt when you're shrunken down, so you tried lessening your tiny adventures
"Please be more careful about roaming about while not being your normal size, you could have gotten seriously injured" she spoke, sounding very disappointed and worried. You couldn't bear to look at her, not when she already sounded so upset.
Noticing your downcast gaze, she approached you, embracing your smaller form. "Don't be upset, I only worry because I care about you deeply" she soothes, rubbing your back gently.
you remind her of a cute little porcelain doll
she enjoys crafting clothes for you: regular sized or doll sized
Michiko appears to be engrossed in her sewing—making sure to pay a great deal of attention to every detail on the miniature clothing. Various types of fabric surround her, along with mini and regular sized tailor's mannequins.
she has a small chair for you that's always on her coffee table for when you and her have tea parties
"It seems that it's taking you a while to finish your cookie, would you like me to make it smaller?" she inquired with a teasing smile. You shook your head vigorously, turning away from her while still munching on the large cookie in your lap.
you like playing hide and seek with her in her room
𝐉𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐏𝐇 𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐀𝐔𝐋𝐍𝐈𝐄𝐑𝐒
you are going to be the death of him
the amount of heart attacks this man experiences within a day is outstandingly concerning
"Honey! catch me!" you shouted from above the staircase. Joseph looks above him, onyx eyes widening upon landing on your figure. Just as you jump off, he rushes to catch you, making sure to not scratch you with his long nails. "Ne refais plus jamais ça mon amour!" he scolded, holding you to his chest. Inky tears trickled down his cracked porcelain-like cheeks as he pressed a small kiss to your small head. That was the moment you vowed to no longer put yourself in any kind of danger.. outside of games of course.
you are cute but troublesome.
STOP HIDING IN HIS POCKETS, YOU MIGHT GET HURT
Joseph chaired the gravekeeper, the last survivor before getting sent back to the manor. Whilst walking down the halls and towards his quarters, he hears a soft yet familiar giggle coming from inside the inner pocket of his coat. He pauses, placing a hand on his temple and closing his eyes in preparation for the upcoming headache.
Using his other hand, he gently fishes out your figure from his pocket. You wave at him, kissing his hand with a sweet smile. Good god, how was he going to get mad at you if you were this unbearably adorable.
you have taken a liking to hiding in cookie jars
The photographer reaches for the cookie jar in his bedroom, opening it to be greeted by the sight of you nibbling on one of the cookies. "My, and what is this delectable treat doing amongst these common pastries~" he teases, picking you up with a smirk. You freeze up, avoiding his gaze. A deep and rich chuckle was drawn from his lips as he closed the distance between you and his face,"Why don't I give you a taste then?" he whispered.
tiny doll's clothes—not including your normal clothing—fills up the drawer of his bedside table
he likes taking pictures of you, he always brings a camera with him in order to document your tiny adventures: walking through the garden's flowers and even on the kitchen cupboards, you can have an adventure everywhere if you're tiny!
𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐕𝐈𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐒𝐓
antonio is amused by your ability to shrink, seeing as he literally examined you from head to toe the first time he witnessed it... he deadass held you in front of his face by your ankle.
he adores you both ways
he babies you when you're shrunken down, treating you as if you were made out of porcelain
"Name! darling! don't lift anything larger than you in that form, you'd likely injure yourself!" Antonio berated, lifting up the teapot, peeling away your tiny limbs from the ceramic. His chucked the crockery behind his head, cradling you in his hand. You blinked owlishly upon hearing the porcelain shatter, opting to instead lean into his touch.
he lets you sit on his head when you're in your smaller form. it sure is nice to have a tall lover, unless you have a fear of heights
he gets you a tiny violin it's just a violin that was shrunken down mysteriously
"'TONIOOO! is this for me?" the survivor questions, shooting an expectant starry-eyed look towards the hunter. The violinist nods, lifting the tiny survivor up to his face using one of his hands. "You seemed rather interested in one and since you're often in your smaller state, I decided to get one appropriate for your size—of course, it can grow to back to it's regular size" he spoke in a hushed tone, not wanting to be too loud because of your close proximity. You squealed happily, hugging his face. "Thanks Toni" you whispered, kissing his cheek.
he accompanies you on your tiny adventure, playing music so it seems like you're in your very own show. he actually enjoys listening or even joining you in your monologues
"As the brave adventurer wanders through the gigantic forest," you monologue, weaving through the tall grass. Antonio played a piece suited for adventure, adding more drama than necessary; his playing was more gentle—telltale sign that it was you he was playing for. A soft smile branded his face as he watched you pretend.
"But alas, the adventurer had to stop midway, for their beloved waited patiently for them to come home from their journey" Antonio butted in, gesturing towards the food spread out on the picnic blanket. They gasped mutely, growing to their regular size before lacing their arms with their lover. "Let's take a break, adventuring can be done later—after we eat!" they beam, causing the violinist to chuckle, amused by their quick change.
of course, you guys don't get back into adventuring after since you both end up taking a nap. always
when you sleep next to him in his bed in your tiny form, he swaddles you in his hair so you don't fall off the bed
you aren't able to wander off this with man, his hair is wrapped around you at all times as long as it's outside matches
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deceptive-daydreams · 1 year ago
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Rockstar!Eddie x Reader Blurb
So this originated from this post by @uglypastels but I just wanted to start organizing my stuff because I'm def writing more and I need to have the lore and shit all in one place which is why I'm posting it here.
Basically, this is rockstar!eddie having this urgent need to spoil you, he tells you to quit your job because it's stressing you out so bad and he has the means to take care of you but you refuse. Lots of fluff, Eddie is a sweetie pie with a huge heart even after his band takes off
i can see like early on in the relationship you haven't moved in with him yet and still live in a little apartment in a shitty part of town and he swears you are the one like has never felt this way about anyone before but he really tries to refrain from suffocating you with his love because he doesn't wanna scare you away. As the relationship grows he hangs out at your apartment in the evenings when you come home from work exhausted and he just loves on you and gets you takeout cause you're so tired and life has just been stressing you out with all the bills and living paycheck to paycheck. He knows that struggle all too well from his upbringing and he can't stand seeing you suffer that way cause you're his baby and you deserve to be spoiled and treated like royalty.
You've been to his house before however you dont get to go over there a lot because of how much you're working but lets just say its fucking nice. It's not super big but its so homey and also screams eddie with the metal posters everywhere and guitars and such. He even has a little pool and a hot tub that you never get to enjoy with him because of how busy you are. He can't take it anymore, he feels like you're so beyond overworked and he will not have it.
One night you're laying in your bed with him complaining about work and all the bullshit thats been happening lately and hes just playing with your fingers, putting his rings on yours and then back on his, just back and forth fidgeting cause hes nervous to ask his question. As you're wrapping up a story from another shitty work situation you're like "that's so fucked up, right!? i've been keeping an eye out for a new job though so hopefully-" and he cuts you off cause no, you won't be getting a new job that will only stress you out, not if he can help it. "Move in with me." he says suddenly. You just turn to look at him like he's insane and before you can protest he's like "no, I'm serious. Move in with me. Let me take care of you, I can't watch you do this anymore." He's super sincere about it and his eyes are all big and pleading. You go on to tell him that you can't do that, you need to make it on your own and it lowkey turns into a fight. You're telling him that you're not going to rely on a man for your wellbeing and saying stuff like "do you think that lowly of me?!" and this is not how it was supposed to go, he just genuinely wants to see you happy and doing all the things you want to do that you never have time for because you're working.
He cups your cheeks in his hands and is like "baby, I think so highly of you, I just wanna give you the world. Please let me. Let me give you all the things I never imagined I'd ever be able to." You still get defensive about it cause he's not just asking you to move in, he's asking you to quit your job and basically run away from your current life which....that's not so bad cause your current life is shit but its also so scary because its the only normal you know so how could you just up and leave it?? You turn him down and let him know that you just can't and he respects your boundaries so after that he leaves it. He still hates how miserable you are but he still wants to be there for you as much as he can. It fucking sucks cause when your car starts acting up he just wants to take it in and get it fixed cause there would literally be no financial burden on him but for you, it would cost like months of rent. To work around it, he says he'll fix it cause he has so much experience with cars and even works on his own all the time. He has it towed to his house where he can use all his tools and stuff in his garage and while he could secretly just take it in somewhere to have it fixed, he doesn't want to upset you if you found out cause he knows you would try to pay him back and he knows you'd find a way to see how much it costs and it would just add to your stress. He doesn't mind doing it himself anyway, its therapeutic so he has it up and running again in a few days.
He loves that you're so independent but it doesn't change that he just wants to shower you with everything you could ever deserve. One day he waits for you at your apartment to come home from work, he has a key and everything and he's setting up a little after work dinner date, nothing too crazy but he brought over an expensive wine for you to try and he can't cook for shit but he's trying to learn so he makes spaghetti and meatballs for you. When you step in the door, he's all excited and running toward the door to greet you, the room actually smells really good and he even threw together some garlic bread and he's super proud of himself and he's excited to see your reaction. Only when he sees you, he stops dead in his tracks because there are tears and mascara streaming down your face and you have one of those frowns that you get when you're trying not to cry but the tears are stinging your eyes. He gathers that you cried all the way home and are trying to hold it together in front of him. He just rushes over and scoops you up to hold you on the couch in his lap and you can't contain the tears anymore, you just start sobbing into his chest while he rubs your back and soothes you. "I've got you, I'm right here." He doesn't even ask for an explanation, he's just there for you and he hopes that when you're ready, you'll tell him but if not, that's okay too.
You're still full on crying, snot and all when you pull back to tell him through a wobbling voice and sniffles "I-I can't do it anymore." And he has an idea of what you're referring to but he just nods with sympathy in his eyes. "Life sucks s-so bad. Don't wanna do it anymore." You would be hiccupping and getting yourself really worked up like almost not breathing. He would shush you gently and cradle your jaw in his hand, the tears slipping down into his hand and say "Baby, you need to breathe, okay? Gonna make yourself sick." and he would help you with little breathing exercises to kinda calm your nervous system. It would work a little but you're still super upset. He sparks an idea and if you yell at him again then so be it cause he just wants his baby to enjoy life and not come home crying more often than not. He would pull your head into his chest again and just whisper "Come live with me. Please. You can quit this job, find something new that you actually like." He tries to reason with you because he knows from last time that you would absolutely not just up and leave without any plans to help pay for things even though he won't allow it. "Eddie, I can't do that to you, I don't know how long it'll take me to find something decent." You would tell him sadly although its a much different reaction than last time because it sounds like you might be on board in some way if you could work things out how you needed. "Sweets, I can't watch you do this anymore. I'd much rather you quit and take some time to find something you actually love than stay here and be sad every day. Come stay with me, you don't even have to get rid of your apartment if you don't want to but just come stay with me and decompress. Let me spoil you a little bit while you figure it out. That's all I want." He sounds so genuine and is talking so softly its making you melt.
Eventually you work out a little deal where you'll stay at his house and search for work in the area. You use up the remaining money you have to keep paying rent on your apartment that you don't even use anymore. Secretly Eddie goes to the leasing office and pays off like a year's worth of rent and gives you your money back. "What this for?" you would ask as you looked at job listings while lounging around at his kitchen counter. He'd just shrug and kiss your cheek. "Don't worry about it." But you will most definitely worry about it. You get heated again and finally pull the information out of him and he admits that he got your money back and paid off a year for your apartment so you wouldn't have to give it up should you decide you don't want to stay with him permanently. It's the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for you but you come at it raging because he shouldn't have to do this. You're trying to argue with him but he just grabs your hands calmly and is like "Listen. I had nothing growing up, I lived in a trailer park in the middle of nowhere." You're not really sure why he's going into this, you knew this from all the late night talks where you'd just lay in bed when neither of you could sleep. "I always had to decide if I wanted to eat or if I wanted to keep the lights on. And I'll be damned if I let you go through that or anything similar to that. I don't wanna spend my money on fancy designer shit or brand new cars. I want to spend it on you and making you comfortable and happy because now I can. I never thought I'd be able to do that for someone but I can now and you're my girl. Let me take care of you in the ways I never even dreamed I'd be able to take care of someone." You start crying again because what the fuck no one has ever been so sweet in your entire life and you're like what did I do to deserve this???
He's there wiping the tears away and nudging his nose against yours. You still don't want to give in but he's so damn sweet and he's being so vulnerable with you, this is something so personal to him. "I'm still getting a job and paying my half." You choke out. He just agrees because it'll make you happy but little do you know that whenever you give him any money he puts it aside in its own account for you. You end up working at a little flower shop and its beautiful, you get to be creative and you aren't stressed beyond your limits every single day. He visually sees that you're happier and you have this glow to you. One day you're both on his couch after he came home from a recording session and you worked late at the flower shop because you'd been working on some arrangements for a big event. You're both so tired and snuggly just watching some stupid movie while snacking. He's got you in between his legs and his thumb is stroking your hip, you both forget about the movie and just start talking about endless things. It comes up that you'd like to start your own little business some day, possibly your own flower shop that also sells cute little things from other small businesses (like soaps, art, etc.). Maybe even have a little coffee bar in it. He sees the way your eyes light up and he just smiles so softly down at you. He puts you both in a position where you're sitting criss cross in front of him and he's doing the same in front of you. "Let's do it then." he says like its the most obvious thing in the world. You scoff cause you don't have even a fraction of the money saved to start a business.
He pulls up a banking app on his phone and starts tapping his fingers away before setting the phone in your hands. You look at it all confused and he's just staring at you all dopey and cute but you have no idea why. He blurts out "It's yours. Every penny you've given me to cover bills. I put it away for you." You gasp when you realize how much money has built up in the account. You want to scream at him but you also know that he didn't do it against his will, he did it because he wanted to, he never does anything he doesn't want to. He's super stubborn even when it comes to his record label trying to tell him what to do. Again, the waterworks start and you collapse into him. He starts telling you "I know you don't like that I do things like this but you're my girl and I can't help it." He would press a kiss to the top of your head and you would pull back to look up at him and just grab him by his shirt so you could kiss him with so much emotion. That night you just make love to each other for hours, you can't keep your hands off each other. You don't know it but he's also planning on buying you a ring really soon and he's going to buy the one that he's seen you stare out when you've been out with him. It's a simple ring that's more dainty than anything and it doesn't even cost a lot, he just sees the way your eyes grow every time you pass that same shop and see it in the window and he knows that he's going to get it for you.
After that night you have less trouble letting him do things for you. Obviously you avoid it if you can but you don't scold him every time he slides his credit card over to pay for things or when you find out he's paid off a loan you had taken out a long time ago for that time you went to cosmetology school a few years ago that didn't end up working out. Suddenly the balance is zero and when you call to clear it up they tell you its been paid off. You make sure to give him the best head of his life but then also complain a little because you feel guilty that he took care of it. He shushes you by shoving his face in between your legs.
~end~
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vinelark · 15 days ago
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i dont suppose you or any of your dear beloved followers know where i can find this one specific titans tower au that i can't stop thinking about. its a really simple concept but i was only able to find it once and now i can't locate it again.
jason comes to the tower so he can beat the shit out of tim as per usual, but he vastly underestimated what tim was capable of and tim kicked his ass six ways to sunday instead. then tim locked him in a closet and said he'd cover for jason this ONE time but if he tried any shit again then all bets were off. then he called bruce to the tower and did some professional manipulation on him and convinced bruce to bring jason home and jasons just like "holy shit this kid is fucking insane. how has he not taken over the world. what the fuck. does he even have morals."
ive found a handful of fics where tim wins but most of them are via manipulation or in an animal shifter au or something like that. please. i beg of you.
ooh this one doesn’t sound familiar to me—hopefully someone else knows it!
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bentosandbox · 6 months ago
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Ambience Synesthesia tutorial blog
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rambled this out because I didn't have inflight wifi otw home and the turbulence was too crazy to draw
Buying the ticket
erm so they only dropped the tickets like slightly less than a month before lol kinda insane
The concert tickets were sold on Damai so you need a CN number or know/pay someone with one who'd buy it for you which is what I did by recommendation (A tier 1280 + 400 'service fee' [apparently it would have been cheaper if they only helped you half way or something but i wasnt gonna risk running into a payment hiccup so]) Iirc they sold it in two batches but I don't remember the ratio split between first and second wave…
I got a ticket for 5/5's afternoon show (so the second last performance), I DID meet an oomf who said they managed to snag a ticket for themselves on their own (without a Professional Ticket Snatcher) so its not too impossible to attain on your own I think??? (I didn't get a CN number until like 2 days before I flew back home soo)
Professional Ticket what?? Uhhh apparently there's a whole industry/scene for this you look for listings on xianyu/taobao etc for people to buy on your behalf, you have to give them your real name and identification number (so for foreigners it'd be your passport number) for verification purposes during entry so yknow yea
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getting there
You could cab directly to the venue but my friend signed us up for the free shuttle bus (they had freebies last year but not this time) and before we boarded they gave us like free water and bread (apparently free raincoats too on rainy days) which was nice of them but also insane because. the venue doesn't allow you to bring food/drinks in so a lot of people were leaving A LOT of unopened bottles near the gate and I saw a venue staff just throwing them all into the bin (HOPEFULLY JUST TO CARRY THEM AWAY IN ONE GO AND NOT FOR STRAIGHT DISPOSAL….) They drop you off near the venue but you don't go in directly, there's a 'Doctor break room' where most people are seated waiting to be ushered in batches into the venue, but also a lot of people standing around on one side of the room swapping/offering merch
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merch swap
ive been told this is a very concert culture thing but i feel like its kind of different because a lot of these are so high quality ike…you could sell them at Artist Alleys but here they are just distributing for free if you have a E2 60 blorbo lmao or whatever (there seems to be a tiny…? minority that prints official art but most of them seem to be handdrawn/made)
i was too unprepared for this lol i did exchange some of my old stickers (missed out on a collapsal plastic fan bc my brain lagged when the guy asked me and i went to my auto 'sorry i dont have any merch' response' :( regretted this bc the room got a little hot from the amount of people in there and i was wearing like 3 layers with that fan on my mind)
from people watching a lot of trades are arranged beforehand on weibo/other sites unless you're willing to yell WHO WANTS TO TRADEEE/anyone wants freebies (a lot of people were also wearing 'Feel Free to Swap Merch/Ask for Freebies' tags) which i was definitely not brave enough to do lol… met up with an oomf i got to know from last dec when i attended an arknights only and they gave me some birbs and charms (bottom of post), there was someone who got a free LGD zine and charm from me bc i posted on wb that id give a free copy to anyone with a Mod 3 swire/swummer LMFAO
I had 2 more people to meet but, uhhh so I bought an esim for mobile data and it would intermittently lose signal here and there which was a little annoying when getting coffee but it just died entirely when i reached the venue and it was kind of Dire because i was waiting for one more friend who was coming over from the fes and i couldn't contact them lmao. told the friend i came with to go in first because I thought if my food got confiscated at least my oomf could see it beforehand LOL
waited outside in a light drizzle for an hour trying to trouble shoot my data to no avail and ended up borrowing a staff's wifi hotspot to get my entry qr code (I actually bought a second data roaming plan on my local sim but i quite stupidly did not check the country coverage and only learned later that night that 'Asia' doesn't cover China kuxiao) she was so nice i was (bow emoji) so sorry to trouble you im a stupid gaijin and she was like no its ok enjoy shanghai!! pien
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spent a good 30min next to this board praying for data to no avail
the show
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erm anyway because of that clownery above i more or less missed the first piece (the one w the goated hoho) but at least i wasnt the guy next to me who went for a bathroom break right before starset came up
The live singing this year was definitely an improvement I think… I can't really remember the setlist off the top of my head but I'm sure someone else has already listed it out, there were a couple of new pieces that weren't related to the concert groups like a Babel/Kazdel?? one sung in Latin, a Victoria…? one (in victorian ofc) also an Amiya (? just remembering by the visuals they used lol) one in Japanese
ohh yeah so almost every track would start with like a faction logo transitioning in from 3d to 2d which was cool but also amusing because it was honestly bringing quite the 'I will Make Your Company Logo Into 3D Fiverr' vibes
Since I missed the first piece idk if any of The Dreamer(s) got 3D models but The Pilgrim(s why are they all singular) had Kaltsit playing on that piano (there was also a replica of that piano on stage the white one complete with 'Arknights' text on it lmao) and Siege being cool running around in 3D (and ofc Eureka during her denpa number) it was very cool but man... its a pity the other characters in the group just get their live2d png during the beginning and effectively get sidelined lool compared to say Phenomenal Agents idk if i like this tradeoff but that eureka bit was so good sheesh #NOVAFIVE⭐ULTRALIVESWEEP
The other stuff was really great too looking at you Lone Trail medley…!!!!! I might be wrong but I... assume... you're encouraged to karaoke bc they always show the lyrics on screen… I couldn't even hear myself anyway but it was very fun singing songs you can't get on joysound/etc with a whole crowd going at it too (even if most of them would only sing 1-2 lines of the chorus)
Mary Clare did Radiant (they had the lyrics scrolling on the sides very cool) and iirc the Throne group's song...? Radiant was so fun live
Starset did Monster > Telescope and when the latter ended they were like Bye! and we(?) started yelling ENCORE--awkwardly because idk how they do it here (I was half expecting it to be JP style 'an-call-roo' but a bunch of us just yelled en-core en-core here and there until they returned to perform Infected) speaking of yelling.. between every piece when they had to switch sets people would just yell memes or skill names (like Dage's) to pass the time or sth i barely caught half of whatever they were memeing about
did i forget to mention anything else uhhh originium rock turntable for Guide Ahead's boss theme/Dossoles Lobby and they had IS4 medley live throat singing very cool also the dancers they got for silbenherze's boss theme good stuff...
iirc after starset was like a behind the scenes video of how HG prepared for AS and a recorded lowlight video saying some stuff that i forgot LOL just some thank you message basically. 9.5/10 bc no missy/shu EP live
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i just realised i forgot to display all the merch from the A tier ticket but w/e. light stick photo ft. merch swaps/gifts from friends and strangers 🥹 (the iffy lenticular card was literally dropped into my bag by an iffy coser (wearing the LT outfit..?!) while waiting for the cab LMAO)
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hella1975 · 1 year ago
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hiiii haha. hello. exceptionally awkward introduction bc idrk how to start something like this so let's just jump right in. im taking a break from this account for a bit. i know i said i wanted taob out before halloween and currently im fine sticking with that deadline, but if i decide i need longer away then i will take longer away. every time ive reassured people that id never abandon a fic and updates will always come eventually i never once considered that my writing and ability to feel safe and comfortable on this site would be actively taken from me, so im not even going to apologise. i dont want this either and more importantly i dont fucking deserve it. i dont know what it is in the past year, if ive hit a certain amount of followers or 'popularity' that's made it so the natural ratio of positive to negative interactions must in turn go up, but there's been a serious uptick in weird asks for me. the annoying part is that a very small amount of them are actually objectively mean and hateful, the rest are just weird and invasive from people who seemingly dont realise that's what they're being. ive reached a point where i dont care if the intentions are good. it's not my job as a 20 year old tumblr user of all things to defend the morality of someone who couldnt even bother to come off anon. unfortunately, after blocking only one or two anons, the weird asks have decreased substantially, which says all you need to know about the fascinating and exhilarating lives led by these people, but ive also gone on to turn anon asks off entirely. this is something i actively fought against doing and had to be pushed into by my mutuals (who have been the coolest people on planet earth during this entire thing). turning off anon was a big deal to me even if it sounds silly. i felt betrayed and like id been backed into a corner because it was so vehmently something i DIDNT WANT that to feel like i had to do it anyway for my own mental health??? that sucks. so even though ive 'fixed' the problem, im still kind of reeling and uncomfortable every time i come on tumblr. i hope it's just something i need time to ease because i'll truly be devastated if this becomes 'ruined' for me. tumblr exists as the only place in the world where i am honestly every facet of myself without shame or hesitation; losing that would be insanely harmful to me. and to the people who cant appeal to the actual human behind the post, let me put that in words you can understand: we wouldn't get any more writing 😦😦😦 riots and fires and sirens, i know. so yeah. to anyone who has sent me an anon ask and you're now wondering if you were part of the problem, im firmly of the belief that you'll know if you are. when i say 'weird asks' i dont mean 'you sent me a para about your personal life just to vent or ask for advice' or 'you sent me a really deep emotional compliment about the impact me and/or my writing has had on you' - i love asks like that, so much that i put off taking a break and turning off anon solely for the joy they bring me. im sorry that it might feel like you're being punished too bc of the actions of what in reality is a HANDFUL of weird people, but this is what i feel like i have to do to feel safe and not go insane every time i log in. love you guys, hopefully ill see you soon x
#seriously another shout out to my mutuals#id particularly like to say thank you to boom who's always right there for me no matter what's happening or how insane im being#and also everyone in our little discord that wound up having to make a whole new channel for venting#bc i was there so often like 'today's weird ask isssss.... telling me about my cupsize!! rip them to shreds!!!'#hannah and theo especially being there and pushing me to finally turn off anon. war is truly over#and of course rori bc the shamelessness u show when hating on my anon asks has been genuinely really cathartic#sometimes u really do just need a rottweiler mutual to tell random people online to kill themselves 😭#okay weird oscar acceptance speechcore gratitude over. i do just rlly love my mutuals#like i went three years not telling anyone about the worse side of internet popularity for fear of looking spoiled and ungrateful#so for the first time to open up about it and be met with outrage on my behalf and people saying in fact it's MORE fucked up#than i initially realised bc ive grown desensitised to it is. yeah cathartic i guess#they are singlehandedly reassuring me of the good this cursed app still holds#so everyone thank them and send them flowers NOW#okay im done i think. see you guys soon. i truly do want to come back asap bc like i said i NEVER EVEN WANTED TO FUCKING LEAVE#SOME ASSHOLES JUST HAD TO PUT GRENADES ON WHAT I ASSUMED WERE VERY UNIVERSAL AND OBVIOUS BOUNDARIES#if you're reading this like 'ohhh fuck i defo sent something invasive lately. i thought it was a joke/we were friends'#then 1) we arent friends if you're on anon. it immediately creates a power imbalance where you know me and any necessary context#but i have no idea who you are or how much you know about me. that's already a fucked dynamic#and 2) I HOPE YOU FEEL BAD. LIKE GENUINELY I HOPE YOU FEEL AWFUL AND HAVE A GOOD LONG LOOK AT YOURSELF#okay i think that's all. ta-ra lads??? how tf do u end something like this#ive queued this to reblog a couple more times throughout the day
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