#hope he’s having fun with quarantine even when quarantine isn’t fun

[vrystalius]

GENERAL HC: demons usually have nests, not traditional like straw and fur nests but little tucked away areas they tend to guard.

Muzan and Kokushibo’s nests are in the infinity castle

Douma’s nest is very comfortable. Very demure. (He tears up pillows and goes apeshit. And then makes his cult members clean up and make a larger pillow for him. Because beds are for basic bitches)

Akaza probably has his nest in the infinity castle too, but he’s a bit more secretive, and prob has somewhere else

Gyutaro has his nest in the red district, (it’s filled with bones and all trinkets he likes.)

(Hantengu + clones bc I LOVE THEM) they probably have a nest in the infinity castle since he and his clones need separate areas to keep them from strangling each other… but JANEHWJ

Urogi has a more traditionally bird nest (he steals shit and makes it into his BED)

Sekido just has a bed. Shames everyone else for having a messy nest

Karaku’s nest is very soft. DO NOT BELIEVE HIM THERES SOME FREAKY SHIT IN TYERE- I know he told me :3

Aizetsu’s nest is a few rocks. He feels he doesn’t deserve a proper nest. (Get him some damn pillows. It’s causing back pain for everyone)

ENMU MY LOVE, his nest is inside the train station, idk the word but it’s where all the trains go when not in use, it’s very comfy! No sunlight, he probably uses train lights to illuminate for his human mate

TURNING HC’S (TW HUMAN EATING MENTION)

Muzan isn’t used to being gentle, and seeing his former human mate in such pain to become a demon like him. He has all his servants tend to them; Kokushibo at the door guarding, Douma out going to get nesting supplies for the newly formed demon liege, Akaza getting human meat for them. Fun stuff! 🤩 he throws a massive festival for his new demon spouse. (It’s an excuse to execute random demons)

Kokushibo has a smaller situation, he brings you a small personal feast, (well hidden human meat so you don’t feel guilty) and goes to some people to have them make human meals (just with human meat instead of beef) and personally brings you his nesting materials

Douma has everyone in the cult, and has a sacrifice for your “ascension” (cult bullshit to explain demons) and how you’d need to be quarantined for awhile (cuddles while you calm down from bloodlust) and you two eat the sacrifice

Akaza calms you by taking you out with him. Probably uses a muzzle so you stop biting him… he doesn’t try and keep you contained so much, just supervising so you don’t hurt yourself… or get caught-

Gyutaro has you and Daki in his nest, pampering you both and is hopeful his sister approves of his mate, power wise and demon appearance. (She’s just excited to have another demon to talk too dw)

Hantengu and his clones are waiting on you hand and FOOT, his clones’ mate shall have the same respect as Muzan, since Muzan chose you to be his demon mate.

Enmu puts you to sleep while this happens, easing the growing pains and hunger, you wake up basically the same just a demon bc of the dreams he gave you. 10/10 very nice.

This was very long 👍

I took pictures just in case if tumblr ate this.

This was so good!! I keep thinking about clawing and skinning Douma during the transformation while he just giggles and laughs loudly. Also, I love the nests- Gyutaro’s would probably stink of decay while Daki’s is the most prestige and comfortable. Only the most expensive fabrics and jewrely is allowed to come even near her nest.

I’m not the biggest fan of Hangengu’s clones, but Urogi stealing things for you and dropping it off at his nest, or trying to feed you foods he stole out of people’s hands like a seagull seems super funny to me XD

Also, I think Enmu tried more than once to nest inside a train but never could decide wich one to settle in since his favourite train model changes almost every week and it would be exhausting to change nests so many times, so probably decided to stay near or inside the busiest train station he could find. And yes, he will kick his feet in delight when watching a train pass by or stop to let passengers in.

Akaza probably is letting you chew and rip his forearms apart as much as you like during your transformation, he literally doesn’t care. Also, he’ll probably try to convince you to don’t eat women as well, but doesn’t mind if you eat them anyway. As long as you’re happy and fed.

I can see Muzan getting ashamed of nesting. He’s the demon kind and supposed to above such animalistic behaviours, but he can’t help to hoard the finest and highest grade pillows/blanket. He likes it comfortable and prestige. Muzan would probably spray some cologne over all of it as well to make sure it smells divine, just like him.

Muzan is probably being a little annoyed at how long your transformation is going. He’s gonna stand there, tapping his foot and checking his watch. He might even get worried and check you for any signs of a bad transformation.

Perhaps I should write more headcanons, those are fun!

[smallmartiniolive]

Thinking abt how Jurassic Park is like obviously abt chaos and the evils of mindless capitalism that destroys what it touches for a profit but also it’s abt the people you know? This is coming from the movie standpoint bc the book didn’t really check off the right boxes for me but the movies are just so inherently abt people and connection! To me

I’m gonna just give my thoughts abt mainly dinot3 bc they are something. So special. To me.

Imagine you’re Alan Grant, in love w dinosaurs and being in the field, ur at the top of your game and it doesn’t even matter as long as you get to study what you love. Then, unexpectedly! You get to share this passion and love w another person and part of you doesn’t understand why it works but that’s ok as long you get to dig up dinosaurs and be with her, Dr. Sattler (understandable

Imagine being Dr. Sattler and always chasing after something and wanting more. You find the love of your life and he doesn’t hold you back at all, he’s perfect! You both thrive in your own lanes! You get on a helicopter to who knows where and you meet this exciting new guy, you don’t love him, not like Grant but he’s exciting and new and you feel like he sees you for something you’re not even sure you see yourself

Imagine you’re Ian Malcolm and you’re made aware of people trying to remake dinosaurs and you know it’s impossible but you also know that life finds a way so you go along. You flirt w some paleontologists, have fun, berate the senselessness of the actions around you. I mean what else is there to do. Then, you get a life altering injury that’s gonna bug you forever and the last person you see is a person you hoped you got to save, who is risking his life to save children (I.e. Grant) and then suddenly you’re waking up to the face that saves you (I.e. Sattler).

And through that all, nobody comes out ok! There’s nightmares and injuries and assumedly they’re quarantined in a Costan Rican hospital till everything’s sorted and people are good to go. Alan and Ellie always find each other, planets in orbit etc, and of course Lex and Tim are connected to Alan after everything. The kids cling to them and they protect them, but also they at least have each other and are stronger for it, but it also makes them aware of how awful it would be to be alone right now- Ian Malcolm. So they all spend time together drifting in and out of hospital rooms (most commonly Ian’s bc he can’t move around much) and after all that they’re connected by shared experiences and the knowledge they can’t share. Pandora’s box and all that but they all end up woven together.

They separate but I’m sure it’s apparent that Malcolm ends up alone, not wanting to rely on anyone, especially not his ex-wives and kids cause that would be unfair and even in pain he’s still trying to protect other people. So they end up together again, how could they not? Malcolm needs help, they all do but that’s a touchy topic and it’s easier to focus on what they can see. Alan and Ellie and Ian finish up at the dig and Alan just wants everything to be the same so he can forget and Ian needs the change, but Ellie? She’s not really sure and it leaves her unsteady.

All at the same time you have Malcolm writing his book bc the truth was always what was most important to him, like Alan to dinosaurs. Alan doesn’t want him to ruin his life, and Ellie wants to support him but doesn’t know how but they coexist.

Ian gets better. He leaves w/ Sara a woman he met shortly after the hospital and whom he seems inexplicably fond of having witty banter with. He leaves so that when he publishes his book it doesn’t come down on them, he leaves because Ian Malcolm has never been one to want to settle down and he’s afraid of becoming complacent, that if he stops moving he’ll lose something critical (he’s shark-like, Ian).

And then the digs over and Alan’s ready to throw himself back into another, but Ellie simply isn’t. She gets a teaching position in another state, and Alan doesn’t ask her to stay but by god he wants to (just like he wanted to w Ian although he never had the chance bc he was gone so much quicker) and it’s the biggest mistake he ever makes.

Ellie leaves. Ian reconnects w his kids, reminded by Alan and Ellie how important family is and that hiding only does them a disservice. Alan digs.

They still stay relatively close, stuck in orbit even though they’re separated, they message and mail and spontaneously stop by when they’re in town (Ian). There’s distance but it’s not uncrossable, they’re still there for each other. They still call and those calls never go unanswered, no matter how late.

Ian goes to Isla Sorna and it’s shoved in his face that he’s changed, whether he wanted to or not. He wants something more stable, of course he still wants independence but he also wants to come home to *something* (he misses what he had w Alan and Ellie but he’s trying to avoid that iceberg). Alan and Ellie find out and it’s the beginning of an end, they fly out immediately and check in w him, and stay a few days. But. But Ian didn’t tell them, didn’t tell them abt something so critical to the three of them.

They grow a lil farther apart.

Alan goes back to work. Ian mutually splits w Sara (word is she and Nick have something weird going on when they aren’t traveling the world for respective careers)

Ellie marries Mark, the guy she met while teaching. He made her laugh and was a lil plain but she liked it (reminded her of Alan). Although Mark is different, he brings up kids on the third date and he’s everything she needs right now, he’s stable and kind and his job travels w him so she never has to worry which would take precedence (her or the job). He loves her for her or what she is right now and there’s something in the back of her mind but she loves him and they build a life together.

Ian meets a woman he can settle down with, an intellectual and a perfect mix of Ellie and Alan (although he doesn’t know it) and he settles down too, finally ready for that build-a-family lifestyle that he’s started to want. They have two kids (canon compliant due to the five kids comment in Dominion) probably around Ellie’s kids age, they probably have play dates. Alan doesn’t come around too much but he mails occasionally or helps set up furniture, but he’s undeniably pulling away.

Alan who couldn’t just ask people to stay, is alone and he’s become increasingly aware because of his new grad student. Billy Brennan is a mirror, he’s everything Alan was (admittedly more flirtatious tho) and Alan can’t do anything but nurture it because he wouldn’t even know how to change (because god knows he wants to). So he pulls away and focuses on work and at least w Billy he’s not alone and maybe maybe he can help him get on a better track (his version of accepting defeat)

Of course he doesn’t stop seeing Ellie or visiting w Ian over mail or the occasional spontaneous visit (couldn’t bring himself to) but he pulls away still. During play dates, Ian sneaks looks at Ellie’s calendar and will conveniently tell Alan when Marks out on business ( bc I refuse to believe Alan didn’t visit Ellie even tho Mark first meets him when Charlie is 2 so I believe he snuck on in cus it makes sense you know). Alan loves Ellie’s kids more than himself and probably bought Charlie his dinosaur toys (Ellie groans abt his taste but she knew it would happen and loves him anyway).

And then Alan, who has never really been alone but has isolated himself to that point, gets a chance to see dinosaurs again (he says it’s for the money but dinosaurs are what’s always made sense to him). He gets lost. He’s got no way out. He calls Ellie bc she’s always been his beacon of light, saving grace, Hail Mary etc etc. (Also him bringing Ian up to Eric bc that man has never been normal about *either* of them).

Ellie meets him at the hospital (maybe w Ian who knows) and Alan is made increasingly aware (between yelling and crying and thank gods) that he’s not alone he’ll never be alone as long as they’re around.

And after that they’re sort of ok. They have regular visits and there’s distance but they settle, they try. They bitch abt Jurassic World together and how all the kids they’ve collected are doing. One of Ian’s eldest going into paleontology bc she met Alan Grant at the age of 15 and it altered how she thought academically and Ian is exhausted. Ian and Ellie’s partners don’t really understand it but they also know not to interfere (even if sometimes frantic calls wake them up in the middle of the night).

Alan stays in his ways (hoping for a change but not seeking one).

Ian and his wife have a tiff bc she accused him of loving her bc he loves Alan and Ellie at least at first (still does in a different and perhaps more powerful way than her?) and he can’t lie bc it’s all the truth with him. He says it’s not fair to her to not know that Alan and Ellie are just his people, you get it. She doesn’t, not really, it only ever made sense to the three of them. They divorce but it’s amicable.

Ellie and Mark have been on the rocks for a little, they’re relationship has always been a bit boring but that was never a real problem. However, she wants to go out and do more field work (writing books was great but she’s ready for a change bc the world turns quick but she’s always moved faster). He wants to have an at home life and one thing spirals to another. She chose him bc he’d never need to choose between anything and she wouldn’t either, they could both have everything and he’s a great guy, but. But now she needs a change and once again she’s left in a situation where someone can’t bend for her, so she breaks it. They divorce and it’s heartbreaking, they love each other, but Ellie has always needed some flexibility (she calls Alan and Ian later on and they drop plans to have dinner together, she doesn’t bring up the break up but she does note how they changed things for *her*, it’s nice maybe they changed)

Maybe they’ve all changed a lil you know? Ian travels, lectures, makes connections, and visits w the people he loves. Ellie writes paper after amazing paper after amazing book between field work. Alan digs. They communicate in academic papers and books that they send each other, their love notes are annotations that feel a lil too raw so they’re kept private. Every new paper and book and interview fuels the three of them forward and keeps them in orbit. Despite everything.

Then, Ian is hired by Biosyn (Ellie encourages it a bit bc she doesn’t trust them, Alan discourages it for the same reason). And then they’re back, they are SO back. They come together to fight against what they’ve always had to fight against, it’s a lil exhausting but they have each other. Through it all it’s always them. Every single time. Alan and Ellie meet and see each other like they don’t see anyone else. It’s a little unfair to Ian because they’re prepared and his entire world gets flipped for a second when he sees them (it’s ok he recovers pretty quick). They fall in step, into old conversations and patterns.

And between taking down Biosyn and avoiding dinosaurs they all kind of fall in love, not again bc it’s always been that way for them but it’s just so so apparent. They can’t give each other up and everytime they look at each other there’s comfort and understanding without words. It was easier to deny a part but now they are here and it’s just so. Perfect

Ellie tells Alan she needs to go, she’s always been too fast for this world, Alan tells her he’ll stay which is the best love declaration she could have asked for.

Ian says he needs to tell the truth, he’s always had to, and they say “we’ll be with the you, we will tell the truth with you.” You know and that’s their love declaration, Thats them asking him to stay, to be with them.

And at the end of it all, Alan says in the end he’d just rather not be lonely again, and Ian and Ellie look at him like he’s absurd bc of course he’s stuck w them now. It’s always been them even if they didn’t realize it

OH MY GOD LOOOOONG POST IM SORRY IM NOT NORMAL AT ALL HAHA. Dinot3 is something I’m not normal about because look at their stories!! Look at how through everything they fit together!! They are in Montana somewhere rn having a beer and laughing abt something silly one of them did and talking abt their collective kiddos.

TLDR; just my thoughts on DINOT3 and just their canon timeline and how it’s always been those three.

[selfdestructivecat]

I’ve seen quite a few posts in response to Thomas’ recent video, specifically his year in review. In this video, he discusses the setbacks he’s faced the past few years — such as the quarantine, Joan’s departure, and his own personal doubts and insecurities — and how they impacted the production of Sanders Sides.

And I truly sympathize with him. No, seriously! It’s already difficult to create something this big almost entirely on your own, but I’m sure this year only made things even more difficult. I know I’ve definitely felt insecure to the point of feeling sick when it came to things I created, so I can empathize with the enormous amount pressure he must be feeling.

However, many posts I’ve seen following this video are saying things along the lines of “If people still criticize Thomas after this video, then I’m going to lose it” or “Not that people who criticize Thomas even care, but Thomas really struggled this year. I’m with him all the way!”, or even “I bet SaSi critics will still demand the finale even after this. I doubt they’ll even watch the video!”

I want to clarify that this is obviously not everyone who doesn’t like ts criticism. People who block criticism blogs and/or the tag, who ignore criticism in general, or who feel upset when they see criticism of something they love: this is not about you. You are absolutely valid and entitled to feeling the way you do, and I hope you have a lovely day. Feel free to block me if that would be good for your mental health. Please take care of yourself. /gen

But to those vocally condemning ts critics, I want to make several things clear.

First of all, you are lumping everyone who criticizes the show in with people who demand the finale with no regard for Thomas’ well-being, for the well-being of his crew, and for basic common sense. While many people are upset that the finale isn’t out yet, we aren’t specifically mad that we don’t have a completed video to watch; rather, we are frustrated with what this says about the SaSi crew, their work ethic, and how they treat fans of the show.

We aren’t upset that we can’t watch the finale right now. We are upset that we’ve gotten very few updates about the show during this period between canon episodes. This video provided wonderful insight into why the finale has been delayed, and we would have loved something like this years ago. Obviously it didn’t have to be a 20 minute video, but maybe a Twitter thread? Something small that made us feel heard?

Hell, even announcing an official hiatus would have satisfied the vast majority of critics (myself included), instead of throwing SaSi into this limbo of “Oh it’s going to be finished this year, we promise- oh whoops, never mind! Next year for sure!” It’s been a constant chain of broken promises, and we were more than happy to give the crew some grace the first few times, but after a while, a repeated mistake becomes a pattern. And this pattern is not pretty.

We are upset that the crew seems incredibly disorganized (going back to the lack of updates, and of course taking into account how we haven’t gotten even a single part of the finale in five years), which could affect the quality of this series we all love so dearly. beauty-and-passion has spoken about this a lot (and is a lot more eloquent than me lmao, please go check out their stuff!) The most recent Christmas video seems to demonstrate that the series may be on the right track, and I will admit I was wrong in regards to this video, but the Inside Out video is a mess in so many ways. Even if this doesn’t prove a decline in quality, it certainly indicates a lack of consistency, which can be just as damning for a series.

We are upset that, while SaSi is in this limbo, Thomas seems to have been focusing on his other projects without telling us about this change in priority. He is welcome to pursue other projects, obviously. I’m thrilled that he is having fun with Roleslaying with Roman and My Roommate is Hades. But these new projects have come at the cost of Sanders Sides content, which also points towards a lack of organization. Some clarity towards which projects Thomas chooses to focus on would have been wonderful and greatly appreciated, so that we know not to expect something we won’t receive. And hey, maybe if we knew not to expect SaSi content until much later, maybe we wouldn’t have been constantly asking why we weren’t receiving SaSi content?

(And this is not an excuse for aggressively demanding content, obviously. But I feel like people who are confused and frustrated at not receiving something promised to them are justified in these feelings.)

And maybe we’re jumping to conclusions in many regards. I won’t pretend that we are prophets who can peer into Thomas’ mind and know what he’s thinking and feeling at all times. But it’s pretty damn difficult to say that NONE of the above could suggest that Sanders Sides isn’t held in the same regard as it once was. Hell, Thomas even admits in the video that he doesn’t feel as connected with these characters as he once did.

Second, many people attacking critics are also quick to drag their character. We are impatient, greedy, selfish, and cruel. We don’t care about Thomas; we only care about the end product! More Sanders Sides at any cost! We don’t like critical thinking, since we obviously didn’t watch the video; we only want to find mean things to say about Thomas and the show! We don’t like engaging in civil debate with our fellow Fanders who may disagree with our opinions; we only want to make other people feel bad, and to make others hate the show, too!

Well, guess what? You’re doing to us exactly what you think we’re doing to Thomas: you’re assuming the absolute worst of us and looking for any reason to drag us down.

We are critics. We analyze media (media that we love, mind you) and we acknowledge that it isn’t perfect, that the creators aren’t perfect, and we point it out. But we still love it anyway, because to truly love something is to love it with its flaws, to know that it could be better, to brainstorm how it could reach its true potential, and to keep doing so because you believe in this potential.

We aren’t trying to take away the joy you feel from Sanders Sides. So please don’t try to take away ours.

[sapporo-division]

With the COVID numbers slowly rising again (unfortunately), that's got me thinking of a question I wanted to ask...

If COVID took place in the HypMic universe, how would your OC's handle it? Would they slowly go insane from being trapped indoors? Would they develop an unhealthy drinking/smoking habit? Or would they be perfectly fine?

Actually Yuki would be the one to catch up in everyday news and as the pandemic happens, he takes serious precautions on keeping himself safe by wearing mask, washing/sanitize hands, and keeping distance from other person. He isn’t bothered and understand the situation when every workplace went in lockdown but just because everyone should stay at home safely doesn’t mean he wouldn’t do anything from doing his work so most of his time he’d arrange a zoom meeting with his colleagues just discussing about work stuff by as per usual but if he gets to relax for the first time, I would say he spend of his time enjoy reading King Arthur books or watch a marathon (screenshare with Iwao & Yaoki) and play with his pet wolf, Blanc. Although it kind of sad for him that he won’t travel to England for a visit in seeing his family until the quarantine was subsided

Iwao really likes to go outside a lot I mean, he’s a street magician after all! He has to perform his usual tricks in public while hearing people’s cheers and laughs of young and old audiences then lastly greeted with applauses but if it’s pandemic, he would probably feel bored staying at home for too long that he won’t able to do his work for awhile it’s like you’re put in a time out. He understand it’s the only way to keep us safe and alive but he still complaint while hugging his two precious bunnies tight and he feels sorry to the children that he won’t visit them at the hospital as he’d promised. Although he does have a backup plan in case like this would’ve happpen, he would do his magic tricks on live for the time being. He’ll have to wait until everyone can able to got out again

Most people know Yoichi’s a type of person who doesn’t want to breathe in a same air with many people but good news! this boy he’s celebrating his heart out that he won’t have to deal with people and his demanding boss and enjoy himself being at home spending time most on his own tiny sanctuary (his room) of using his computer, playing video games, reading manga while other times he had zoom meet with his friends (especially his team, Saburo, and Doppo). Of course he should be aware to stay hygiene if ever we can on going out but for the time being, he had so much time for himself without care in the outside world in a hope this quarantine won’t last long

ARE THEY S***ING ME RIGHT NOW!? IVE BEEN ASLEEP FOR SO DAMN LONG AND YOU’RE TELLING ME I CAN’T GO OUT JUST BECAUSE THEY’RE SCARED OF A F***IN VIRUS! F*** THIS GERM BULLS*** I KNOW IT AIN’T REAL! EVERYONE EVEN THE GOVERNMENT ARE P*SSIES YOU’RE JUST SAYING THAT SO YOU CAN RUIN MY FUN, YOU A** Ruichi wasn’t aware of COVID regulations and warnings that was announced around Japan until he gets the message, he was pretty upset knowing he can’t go out like he used to so that means he can’t hurt people anymore which is sucks to him so he went on a batshit rampage in destroying of Yoichi’s bedroom furnitures to bring his frustration out. He knows how much it’s suffocating to stay indoors for who knows how long like you’re trapped at the asylum inside a white room and wear a straitjacket preventing you from going crazy. It took him awhile to calm himself down and has no energy to do anything anymore because of the safety regulations, he just went back to his sleep again then Yoichi quickly went back to his senses, completely unaware what’s going on except he found his favorite anime figures, mangas, video games were scattered on the floor as his room were a complete mess

[soapkaars]

So, yesterday I made a poll before going to bed and, while it isn’t done yet, consensus seems to be to draw more obscure Lorre characters.

Of course, Lorre being a somewhat obscure actor, what would make an obscure Lorre character? Well, M, The Man Who Knew too Much, the Maltese Falcon, Arsenic and Old Lace can be taken off the list because they're somewhat known in the mainstream. They're also usually the films that draw people into the Lorre fandom! The Secret Agent, Mad Love, Crime and Punishment, The Stranger on the Third Floor, and Der Verlorene also fall off, because I’ve often seen these being discussed in books about cinema, cinematic history, and classic directors. Crime and Punishment and Mad Love even feature in a '50 films you should see before you die' compilation that I have lying around somewhere! I was an Adventuress, The Boogieman will get you, You'll Find Out, the Raven, Comedy of Terrors seem to be pretty popular in fandom circles (especially where Lorre films intersect with other fandoms - like Vincent Price, Bela Lugosi, and Boris Karloff)

So I decided to focus on the films that aren’t as discussed, either in mainstream or in fandom or in film critic circles, featuring characters who seemed to cash in on Lorre's breakout film noir character: Joel Cairo. Or, as @angelamontoo once jokingly called them: 'Coel Jairo'. But I like them because they are different enough from Joel to be stand on their own, and the films they featured in are strange or interesting enough also to make fun analyses of.

First up: Kismet, the gardener studying for his civics exam and doubling as a cool knife thrower for his side gig. I like him a lot. I remember waiting for days to torrent My Favourite Brunette, and having to watch it as a thumbnail because it was the only version I could download. I was so entranced by Kismet. I loved how the film changed in tone whenever he came around - he strengthened Bob Hope's comedy by playing his menace straight and I've always had a soft heart for the 'extremely capable henchman' trope. Bob Hope's character is also hilariously unnerved by him, and one of my favourite scenes is when he tries to throw a knife at him, and Kismet just catches it, barely changing his expression. I also love how sick Kismet is getting of Ronnie Jackson's amateurishness and can barely conceal his glee when he gets to kill him.

Next up: Gino from The Chase. I like this film. I know it's a bit of a messy film, and I once turned it off when it turned out the whole scene in Cuba was hallucinated, but when I rewatched it and watched it all the way through, it really grew on me. There’s something intriguing about the dreamlike narrative it tells, and I love the visuals. I love how Gino stands in front of the roman busts, or how we first only see his eye through the eyehole behind a little cupid head. I like the nightmarish quality of the scene where that one guy gets torn apart by dogs in the wine cellar. I like how Gino's presence overshadows the scenes in Cuba. The way he becomes the figure of Death in this film. I love the strange scene where Chuck Scott ends up in the quarantine house, lit up by gaslamps and the constant sound of crying. I love the strange dinner scene where Lorna Roman is miserable and how Gino and Eddie Roman appear to be having an affair in her presence. I was disappointed when the film tried to clarify the hallucinations because it felt to me like it dropped the ball. I could have seriously enjoyed it more if it leaned in way more into its strangeness, like Stranger on the Third Floor did.

Finally, I drew Marco from Black Angel. I'm cheating a little, because Marco's been getting a bit of a comeback lately, but I think he still counts. I loved this film too. It’s such a classic film noir, with the flashbacks, the red herring villain (Marco), the drunken antihero, the psychological drama, the twist, the camera angles and effects… It’s exactly the kind of film I'd use as an example to explain the whole genre. I like Marco. Not least because he's one of the few Lorre characters who gets to see the end, but also because he's so well-worn… if that makes sense? Like he's seen it all. He's been around, he knows what people try. He manages his nightclub and that’s that. The film ends but you feel like Marco's club will still remain. Perhaps there are traces of it still around. I like Lucky, Marco's heavy. His right-hand man. His silly little rabbit. Does he call you that? Yes. No.

I hope you liked these!

[thekidsarentalright]

ok ok i’ve started to process the album but honestly cant stop yelling enough to write a coherent ask so here’s a whole bunch of stuff that has me going feral:

the title track. i think fob just released one of my fave songs ever, it went to my top 5 from them so fast!!! it reminds me of how much the pandemic fucked up for everyone… “thought we had it all” fr!! but like. the strings??? the choir at the end?! SUNSHINE OF MY LIFETIME REPRISE?!?! SHUT UP FOREVER!!!!! (also my bday is the “day after christmas past” so i nearly screamed when i heard that line lmaooooo… followed immediately by “my pain isn’t cool enough”?! literally almost fell over at that point. that felt like an accidental shoutout and then getting punched directly in the gut 😭)

flu game is absolutely my second fave!!! the “youuuu” in the chorus just hits my brain a certain way i’m obsessed!! also i relate to it a little too much 😭

what a time to be alive!!!!! soul punk vibes fr <3 also that bridge goes so hard i think screaming it live would fix me 😭 WHEN I SAID LEAVE ME ALONE THIS ISNT QUITE WHAT I MEANT!!!! GOT THE QUARANTINE BLUES BAD NEWS WHAT’S LEFT!!!!!

the strings in i am my own muse?!?! patrick is just flexing at this point (as he should) <3

my synesthesia went crazy with heaven iowa… it’s this beautiful deep blue/indigo/purple situation and i want to live in it <— totally normal thing to say abt a song

so good right now gave me whiplash right after heaven iowa but it’s so fun! i went from crying to dancing so fast lmao

in general i love space and this album delivered w the references!! i caved and bought the glow in the dark stars 😳

and the living even though it’s painful and scary, especially when it’s painful and scary vibes… fob always knows what we need to hear i swear!!! ur post abt the themes on this album is so so true <3

patrick dressed as a chicken playing the piano… i love him so much it’s stupid <3 also that music video nearly killed me. couldn’t see the screen super well when they were on fallon and didn’t process that the costume was like… a muscle suit for a solid minute. my brain literally shut down lmaooo 😭

ik there’s like… lyric parallels and stuff i got rlly excited abt but am totally forgetting rn! i’m sure it’ll come back when i listen to the album again (which i’m probably gonna go do rn) but… yeah!! so glad we get to be insane abt all this on here together lol <3 peace and love in fob world ☺️

- 🧋 anon

YESSSS the title track is INSANE with how good it is and how much is in it like. i swear every lyric hits Hard, the reprise absolutely breaks my heart it is so. Perfect. so so so valid for it being in your top 5 fob songs of all time already it is genuinely That Good!!! and made for you Clearly with that birthday shoutout!!! even with the gut punch after. every lyric feels like such a gut punch i swear kfgjdhfkjs

flu game is ALSO one of my top favs, i could not rank this album yet even if it would save my life kfjsdkfj but i know for Sure flu game is in like. top 5 territory. i'm obsessed w it for the same reasons fr it is. too relatable thanks pete (haha i said the thing!)

REAL i need them to perform what a time to be alive live SO bad literally just so i can scream that bridge i think that would fix me fr fr. also just love how dancey it is while having. incredibly depressing lyrics. vibe of all time fksjdhfks

patrick is flexing w his arranging skills all over this album but Esp in i am my own muse and i hope he keeps flexing forever bc it is. so good!!!!

OUGHHH heaven iowa being purpley blue it so pretty... to me it's like... idk a very warm song, orange/yellow/golden so. the opposite of you KFJDSK but still pretty i Also wanna live in it. we are So normal for that bff <3

they are literally sick for putting so good right now right after heaven, iowa it was Such an intense tone shift fsdkjfsh i Love so good right now tho it's slowly becoming one of my favs i think

i absolutely love how jam packed this album is w space references, i was anticipating it but Still am like. fuck yeah space fkjdshkfjs i'm still debating on getting the glow in the dark stars tbh... is u getting them a sign i should too... much to think about

but yeah the albums themes are SOOOO. like. i think what the world needed to hear right now, also what i needed to hear rn, what You needed to hear like. they always know!!!! it is just so cathartic to hear that things might not be okay or better but that you can still live and be fulfilled and have love Despite Despite Despite!!!!

and lastly fr i. didn't process it was a chestplate/muscle suit at first either so was like. ready to die over patrick looking like That lmao honestly i still am he pulls off that look way too well. also pulled off the chicken costume imo <3

[thesinglesjukebox]

BON IVER - "S P E Y S I D E"

"Speyside is not a place; speyside is a person that you get stuck with; speyside is a pain that you cannot erase." - /r/boniver

[4.77]

Tim de Reuse: For Emma, forever and ever, ad infinitum. A tedious spiral of Emma, on and on, rhyming "good" with "could" with "stood", rhyming "me" with "sor-Ry," wallowing in unspecific folksy grayness, cashing in on his own bubble fifteen years too late. For Emma, an ourobouros. [2]

Taylor Alatorre: Leaning into it, playing to type, giving the people what they want -- there's something about hitting age 40 that brings out public displays of commitment to an inescapable bit. As with Vampire Weekend's latest offering, "S P E Y S I D E" is built on the idea that what has been deconstructed can be reconstructed again, using the master's postmodernism to bring Ithaka back to its pre-violated state, or something like it. The title and artwork are fake-outs, as is the producer credit for Jim-E Stack, whose role is to engineer the kind of quarantined sparseness that's traditionally cast as the arch-enemy of artifice. It never was, but it's still fun to pretend, and Vernon's lyrics retain their power even when interpreted as a self-conscious bid for authenticity. If you've ever sent a decade-late apology letter to someone, you know that honesty is a fool's game there, that every attempt to avoid trickery will lead to it popping up in some other sentence. "I hope you look" is not a good enough reason on its own to hit "send," but if you can turn a good phrase and do a good falsetto, it sometimes can be. [7]

Alfred Soto: Satisfied with their 2023 Pitchfork Music Festival appearance after years of mockery, I sat down, linen napkin folded on my lap, awaiting tastier goodies. "Tasty" is right, or, rather, "tasteful": acoustic guitar and strings! This isn't for me, but I'll note that "What is wrong with me/I'm so sorry" shows a humility absent from his passive-aggressive peers. [6]

Andrew Karpan: Described by Mr. Iver as “an apology to a couple of people he loved and hurt,” the idea conceptually brings to mind the indy rock generation’s version of Em’s Recovery.  [5]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: smh I can't believe another white electronic pop artist is pivoting to mid acoustic folk music in his late career. what happened to integrity? this Justin Vernon guy is such a culture vulture.  [5]

Nortey Dowuona: Bon Iver's plaintive, taut guitar playing seems at first to provide wrenching emotional bloodletting, but the lyrics quietly cloak it behind metaphor: "as I fill my book, what a waste of wood," "I can't rest on no dynasty, yeah, what is wrong with me?". The gentle string arrangements from Rob Moose weep where his words are not allowed to. The 4/4 line verses feel more and more apologetic as they go on, but the apology is still cloaked, hidden despite the light, frail feeling of the music. The deeper you dig into the words, the more they scarper, the more they obfuscate, until you throw up your hands. It is a message for someone, but that might only be you if you were offered a parley at a quay with someone who just kept retreating from you the closer they got. [6]

Jel Bugle: I have to admit that I got chills when the guy started singing -- not good chills, to be fair. I just can’t get into this country music that isn’t country music, I’d rather listen to Brad Paisley or Zac Brown, someone who could sing this kind of thing with a bit of pep, a bit of sparkle. The wail of modernity is just not for me, the new shoegaze, staring inconsolably at your shoes and airing your most miserable of thoughts. [2]

Mark Sinker: Bon feeling sorry for himself, me not feeling even a bit sorry for him. Yes I do interpret “Speyside Quay” to mean he was on a whiskey-fuelled bender and did something unacceptable. The words are bad, and so is the treatment on his voice. [2]

Aaron Bergstrom: If Justin Vernon has a little dial that goes from "Haunting" to "Haunted," this may be the furthest into the red that he's ever pushed it. [6]

Dave Moore: Docking a point for the annoying stylized spaces between each letter. Not as bad as "L.I.F.E.G.O.E.S.O.N." in title formatting or sound -- inoffensive somber busker shit -- but not much to recommend it, either.  [4]

Ian Mathers: Hi, it's me! I'm the guy who didn't pay much attention to Bon Iver until something made me check out 22, A Million, and it kind of blew me away. I'm a real person, and I exist! Then "Hey, Ma" had none of that record's weird power, and I stopped paying attention again. Is this what he sounds like these days? It's pretty, and the lyrics are decently moving, but it's kind of boring. [5]

Harlan Talib Ockey: Instrumentally direct like For Emma, Forever Ago, lyrically direct in a way Justin Vernon almost never is. Perhaps not distinctively Bon Iver, but still well-crafted. [7]

Katherine St. Asaph: 2:00. That's when you realize that this surprisingly stately grown-folks folk was Bon Iver all along. [5]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[crimsun-n-clover]

i went to dollar tree today

i was going for craft shit. i keep getting rejected for all the delivery jobs i want so i’m trying to make silly little things that i could sell.

i like dollar tree because it makes me feel like there’s hope. i see things and design my trailer in my head. i pick which mugs i’ll use with my coffee maker, which wildflowers i’d plant outside, and which little trinkets i’d get for the kiddos.

i have a whole family of stray cats that i love ever so dearly. usually i can’t get close to them, but i feed them, bring them water, and talk to them in the hope that it improves their lives.

when i left dollar tree, i went around the back of the building because of where i was parked.

(this isn’t the dollar tree i went to last time, because at that one i dealt with the HORROR of seeing sugar’s sister employed there. by horrid chance i had just gotten a utility knife off the shelf there to carry with me in my battle vest, so if any rumors go around about homicidal intent that’s where that shit came from.)

when i went to the back i found a scrawny little black cat and threw out a handful of treats. he ate them up and i parked to get a can of the good wet food. the cat straight up walked over to me like we were friends. i gave him the food and he let me pet him, talk to him, play with him, all that. he has a scratchy little meow and he’s so fun. he was weaving between my legs and climbing all over me, purring and making biscuits. if i walked away, he would follow me. it was amazing. i made a new friend. he had bald spots and scars, as well as an ear notch, but he wasn’t neutered so it was definitely from a fight. he’s such a sweetheart and would roll over and lay on his back and paw at me.

i felt like a monster leaving him.

his name is ronnie and i will now dedicate myself to moving out so i can bring him home. he looks so sick and sad, but he’s so sweet and full of life. he only ate half of the can of tuna and gravy i gave him he’s so LITTLE. i can’t stand to leave him out there in the florida heat and constant floods, but i know i can’t bring him home.

my mom would absolutely kill me, my dad would question how i got him (and hanging out behind buildings is apparently not good), my bastard quarantine dog would eat him alive, and my spoiled sweet baby cat would be so jealous that he’d lose his absolute shit.

so instead of having four things in the way, i’m cool with just the one. i think ronnie and my boy would get along fine. they both are weirdly shaped black cats with green eyes that i found as baby ferals. they’re both affectionate and have silly little meows. i’m sure they’d be fine eventually.

ronnie being a stray is a bit of a problem. he’s not safe and i want him to be safe, but he’s in a really scary part of town for an animal or human. bears n heroin n all that mess. he’s probably covered in fleas and has ringworm or some shit, so i’d have to get him vet care before i could take him home, and there’s no way i can convince my parents. well, maybe my dad, but i’m not going through him for shit. and he’s so over protective of me that he’ll lose his mind about me trying to socialize ferals in bad areas.

my dad got one of his cats the same way. he was playing a bar show and met a stray in the parking lot that let him pet it and weaved between his legs, and he told his band that if the cat was still there after the set, he’d take it home. he was kinda joking, but when the cat was still there, he took it in.

hell, my dad was selling drugs at my age. get over yourself steven. your carbon copy lesbian bastard child is entitled to a little bit of tomfuckery. i’m not even doing anything wrong by normal person standards, my parents are just strict.

sometimes i’ll say something about being a bad person, but then my last remaining best friend will remind me that i found two baby raccoons in a walmart parking lot, fed them, named them, and now try to go check on them regularly. it’s just what i do.

i’m sure i’m the reincarnated motherfucker that found a wolf and just decided “yeah okay you can bite me a little bit because we’re besties now. what do you wanna eat sweetheart i have chicken and all that. yes you can have my entire bed. i sleep on the floor sometimes anyway.”

241 more days of lying, planning, suffering, and waiting to bring ronnie home.

[olliesadventuresss]

Welcome to Ollie's Adventures

Hello, my name is Julia Gaughran I am a junior enrolled in the business administration program here in Providence, Rhode Island. I live with my boyfriend of four years and our wiener dog chihuahua mix Oliver, in an apartment in Woonsocket RI. But this blog is all about my dog. My dog Oliver is a Chihuahua, dachshund, and jack Russell terrier mix, he is three years old turning four on June 18th. He is a brindle color and weighs about 14 pounds.

Now his name might be Oliver, but he sure does have a lot of nicknames, for example Ollie, Olliekinz, Dobby, Yoda, and so many more. He really isn’t like any other dog and his story of how we came to have him is amazing. It was February of 2020 right before the pandemic hit and me and my boyfriend were looking to get a puppy so we were going to shelters and breeders and looking all over but we couldn’t find one that really stuck with us or was in our price range, then one day out of the blue my older brother texted me a picture of this dog and he said “hey my girlfriends friend has this dog he’s just under one year old and she is going to have him put down if she can’t find the right home for him. Would you be interested in taking him?" The very next day my boyfriend and I went to go see this dog and we immediately fell in love and agreed to take him. However, what we didn’t know when we got him was that his previous owners had never taken him outside ever even to use the bathroom because their landlord didn’t allow pets. So, when we took him outside for the first time he was scared and unsure of a lot of things, however with time and a little encouragement from us he grew to love being outside and never wants to come in. He was our perfect pandemic puppy and never left our side throughout all of quarantine and he has grown so fascinated with everything outside and just wants to smell and see everything he possibly can. He truly is just the weirdest non dog dog ever and has the appetite of a horse. I want to do this blog about him because I think people should see just how amazing and weird this little dog is just like I do, and hope people can find some real entertainment in hearing about the things that he does just like I do. I plan on telling you guys all about Oliver’s quirks and fun adventures he goes through.

[marvelouslimelight]

Wishing the happiest birthday to this giraffe jellybean because he truly deserves the bestest of the best

Happy 21th birthday Daniel James Seavey!

April 2, 1999

[shecagobaby]

Love of My Life: Home

Hi! So this is the first chapter of a Joseph fic I’ve been writing in my spare time.  I was originally just writing it for myself in the notes on my phone, but I have been encouraged to share. Honestly what started as an idea has turned into a full blown novel, so expect many chapters as I clean them up and proof read. 

Warnings: None really, just mentions of sex. Now, I know that those that wanted me to share wanted smut- but do not fret my loves, the next chapter will be absolute FILTH. It is just not quite ready, so this is just the appetizer. 

Pairing: Joseph Quinn x Y/N

Alright y’all, please be kind but I would also love feedback! (even if it’s just about the formatting, I haven’t posted in almost ten years, so I hope I’m doing this right. okay love you all enjoy)

________________________________________________________________

SEPT 2021

   Nothing was more beautiful than London in the fall.  The city was the same as it always was: heavy evening traffic, busy sidewalks, loud chattering as people headed home for the night. Even the familiar smell of beer and sweat that seeped out of the neighborhood pub was exactly the same. Yet something about crisp air and the changing trees made the most ordinary things unbelievably beautiful.

    I smiled to myself as a cool gust of wind sent a shiver up my spine. Even though I was leaving a long meeting with my publisher, where I received some semi-harsh critiques on my most recent chapter of my novel, I felt like I was living in a dream world. 

    This autumn felt especially dreamy since Joseph was going to be home in a matter of days.  He was scheduled to wrap filming ‘Stranger Things’ this week, so if things go smoothly he could potentially be back in my arms by the weekend.  Being away from him had been hell. We lived together, so we saw each other every day, and during quarantine we spent every second together. Although we still chatted every day while he was on set, whether it was a quick text or a late night phone call, it wasn’t the same. I hadn’t felt him, held him, kissed him in what felt like forever.  Our flat had lost his scent months ago. Each night I hugged his pillow, trying to get any indication that he was ever there.  

   The steamy pictures and unbelievably dirty words that would quietly leave his mouth on nights we especially missed each other were nothing compared to the real thing. My own fingers were nothing compared to his. I bit my lip as I thought about the things we would do to each other when he got back.

   I was pulled out of my thoughts when I felt my phone buzzing in my purse.  I sighed as I rooted around in my bag searching for my phone. My hands moved quickly, hoping it was Joseph calling on his break, absolutely giddy at the thought of filling him in on the dirty thoughts that had crept into my mind.

   I sighed when I noticed it was my best friend Tabitha, feeling a twinge of guilt at my disappointment when I saw her name instead of his. I groaned as I brought the phone to my ear, “hello?”

   “Y/N, babe, what are you doing tonight?” I heard her Liverpool accent say on the other end.

    I shrugged, “dunno, writing some, got some cleaning. Want the place to look nice when joseph gets back.”

    “When’d ya become such a domestic bird?”She laughed, “I say you fuck all that boring shit and come get a drink with me and the girls.”

  I rolled my eyes. Tabitha was always trying to get me to come out with them, but usually I would rather stay home. It used to be fun when I first moved to London . Tabitha was the first friend I made after moving here from Manhattan. We immediately took a liking to each other whilst waiting in line for the bathroom at some grimy club.  Once Joseph and I started dating, and especially when he left, going out with her became more of a chore, “ya know, the pub isn’t very fun when you all leave me to go hook up with random guys.”

   Over the last few months I hit the pub and clubs with them a handful of times, and it always turned into me bitching to Joe via phone call or text on the walk home because I was playing wing woman all night or they left me to chat up a guy at the bar.

   “Oi, they aren’t random if you met them on tinder,” she joked.

   “Oh yeah, what happened with the last guy?”

  “Gotta be more specific, love. Might have been a few shags ago.”

   I laughed at her promiscuous tendencies, while simultaneously feeling like an old maid. Tabitha was drop dead gorgeous: Great figure, huge tits, bright blue eyes, and long blonde hair.  The only down side to Tabitha was she had unbelievable commitment issues.  She would dissect every man she met until she found the tiniest reason to run for the hills.

   “The one that was buying us tequila shots last time, he had that long hair you said you wanted to French braid,” I  laughed remembering that night.

  “Ugh, gorgeous hair, gorgeous cock, but he had a bird for a pet, ya know one of the ones that talk.  He’d have full blown conversations with the damn thing.  Dunno, made me feel weird,” she groaned.

  I cackled, “C’mon, Tab, it’s not that weird. Lots of people have birds for pets.”

    “Babe, would you want to fuck a lad that walks around the house looking like jack god damn sparrow with a bloody bird on his shoulder?”

  I shook my head at the image in my mind, turning to walk up the steps that led to my building, “guess not.” I fumbled with my keys, holding the phone between my ear and my shoulder. I found the building key and put it in the lock, opening the door, “wouldn’t it shit on his shoulder?”

  “Dunno, but I wasn’t going to stick around to find out,” she said. I started walking up the steps, climbing to my warm apartment. “So are you gonna come or not, feels like it’s been ages since I’ve seen ya.”

  I sighed, “I don’t know yet, Tab. Been a long day, kind of want to be low key.”

  I got the key to the flat Joe and I shared as I reached our floor, walking to the door and unlocking it, “No you just want to sit around waiting for Joe to give you a call.”

   I rolled my eyes and smiled as i pushed the door open, she was not wrong about that. “Tab, you can’t blame me for missing my boyfriend, you’ve never had to do long distance.”

  “That’s because I don’t do relationships, can’t miss someone if it’s not serious.”

  As I entered the flat, I was enveloped by a warm sensation. It was much warmer than usual. I sighed, thinking about Tabitha’s offer. “Can I let you know?” I said shrugging off my purse and bending down to pet our dog, Mikey. I actually got Mikey when I was seventeen, long before I met Joseph.

   I couldn’t help but smile as I reminisced about the first time Joseph met Mikey:

   ‘Michelangelo? Like the painter?’ 

    ‘No, the ninja turtle.’ I said as I introduced my boyfriend to the dog I referred to as my son.

   “Hi, babe, had a good day?” I asked Mikey as I bent down to give him a few pets before he ran off. I furrowed my brows, usually Mikey would go crazy when I go home, but he did not want anything to do with me at the moment. 

      “Fine,” Tabbie said, I could feel her rolling her eyes through the phone, “Give my love to Michael. I’ll give you a call later, alright?”

  “Talk to ya then,” I said taking the phone away from my ear and hanging up. I slid out of my jacket and hung it on the coat rack by the door.

  “Hey, love.”

  I gasped at the voice, whipping around to see my gorgeous boyfriend standing in the living room.

  I  froze, completely shocked. I blinked hard. Was this real? I stared at him, he was standing there with the fireplace going behind him. No wonder it was so warm, and it really explained why Mikey wasn’t interested in me. Often times I teased Joseph that he was in a relationship with my dog.

  “Surprised?” He said smiling at me.

  I felt like my heart was going to pop, tears pooled in my eyes. He was real, “oh my god, Joe.” I half screamed half sobbed as I spoke. I quickly moved to him. As I got closer he held his arms out for me.

  I collided with him, he wrapped me up in a loving hug, lifting me up as Mikey danced at our feet. I instinctually wrapped my legs around his waist, squeezing him tight against me while I buried my nose between his neck and shoulder. His familiar scent clouded my senses. No matter what cologne he wore, he always smelt the same: mahogany, cigarettes, and spearmint never smelt so delicious. I tangled my fingers into his soft curls, desperately trying to bring him closer.

  “I missed you so much,” he groaned into my neck, leaving a soft kiss there.

  I pulled away to look at him, the tears in my eyes spilling over. I brought one of my hands to his cheek, running my thumb over his beautiful features. He leaned into my touch and hummed, his bright brown eyes staring into mine.

  I couldn’t believe he was here. I leaned down to catch his lips in mine making butterflies erupt in my stomach. His soft lips felt like heaven against mine, i couldn’t believe I had almost forgotten what they tasted  like. I put both my hands on his cheeks and kissed him harder as tears continued to fall down my face.

  He broke the kiss to scan my face, “happy tears, yeah?” He whispered.

  I laughed, “yeah.” He set me down on the ground, keeping one hand around me and the other came to my face to wipe away my tears.  I placed my head to his chest, feeling his heart beat against my cheek.  “I missed you so fucking much,” I whispered.

  “I know, love. But I’m here, I’m back.” He sighed, resting his chin on the top of my head. Mikey let out a low bark as Joseph bent down to scoop him up in his arms, “Did you miss me, huh? Ya miss your dad?” my heart swelled, as I gave Mikey a few pets. Our little family was back together.

   We stood there like that for who knows how long. A few seconds, minutes, hours? Who could tell?

    He put Mikey back on the floor before he brought his hand to my chin, cupping it making me look at him. He leaned down to place a soft kiss to my lips. I hummed against his mouth and i felt him smile against mine. “I love you,” i breathed.

   “I love ya, too. So fucking much.” He said resting his forehead against mine.

   “How are you here?” I asked, running my hands down the soft fabric of his burnt orange shirt, biting my lip as I felt his warm skin underneath.

  His hands roamed my back, the pressure of his fingers felt amazing. His hands moved down and slipped into the back pockets of my jeans. His breath fanned over my face as he said, “I finished up two days ago, thought I would surprise my girl.”

  He placed a soft kiss to my forehead, “well it worked,” i sighed. “How’d you know i wouldn’t be home?”

  He chuckled, a silly grin lighting up his face. “Agnes, she called me when you were leaving.”

  I giggled and rolled my eyes. Agnes lived in our building. She was 76, had 4 corgi’s, and was incredibly nosy. She somehow managed to know everyone’s business before anyone else.  I swear the short woman just stood with her eyes glued to her peep hole, watching as everyone lived their lives. She was incredibly kind, but I always dreaded when she would be in the hallway at the same time as us.  She would stop us and fill us in on all the building gossip. I would always smile and now as she spoke; but I got the feeling that Joseph kind of liked gossiping with her, his eyes always lighting up at her stories.

   “Gotta love her,” I whispered, my fingers tracing the thin chain he was always wearing. As I took a deep breath i smelt something familiar.  I furrowed my brows, “are you cooking?”

    His eyes went wide, “oh shit, almost forgot.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me to the kitchen. The scent got stronger the closer we got. I recognized it immediately. He was cooking my favorite, an amazing mushroom stuffed chicken in a white wine sauce. I remembered him watching me take a bite the first time he made it for me. He looked so handsome and so relieved when I told him I loved it.

    ���Makin’ your favorite,” he said as we reached the kitchen.

     I was confused, “Joseph, shouldn’t I be doing this kind of stuff for you? what is all this?” I looked around and noticed the table was set, candles were lit, and there were flowers in a vase on the counter.

    He wrapped his arms around me from behind, I leaned my head back so it was resting on his chest. “Just want ya to know how much I love you.” He kissed the top of my head and continued, “you’ve been so supportive and patient with me through all this, I don’t think I could have done it with out you.” His words made my heart swell. I reached my hand back to caress his cheek. “So, this is my thank you,” he whispered.

  “I don’t feel like I did anything. it was all you, you did it all on your own.” I turned around in his arms, he was shaking his head. His eyes were filled with so much love. I felt like i could start crying again as I spoke, “I don’t deserve you, Joseph. Thank you for all of this.”

    He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to my lips, “you deserve the world, Y/N,”

he whispered against my lips. I smiled as I leaned into his kiss. He was the kindest person I had ever met. I had never felt so safe and secure in a relationship. He loved me so much and I knew it, and he knew I was in love with him. He knew me so well. He knew my mind, heart, and body like he knew his own. I also could not help but feel like he was stuck with me given the fact that Mikey was enamored with him.

   He pulled away from the kiss making me whine.  I tried to pull his face back down to mine, suddenly aching for his kiss.  He smirked and grabbed my hands, chuckling at how desperate I was to feel his lips on mine, “there is a catch though,” he hummed.

   I raised an eyebrow, “and what might that be?” I asked.

    “Well first, you’re going to make me your famous dirty martini that you know I’ve missed so much,” he whispered.

    I blushed and looked down.  When Joseph and I met in early 2018 I was bartending for some extra money. I will never forget the first time he came in and sat at the bar. He had a long day and just found out he hadn’t gotten a role he really wanted. He ordered a martini from me and went on and on about how it was the best one he ever had. I remember he stayed until the pub closed, talking and laughing with me. I was sad when he left, he hadn’t asked for my number or anything. I remember my heart sinking, knowing I would probably never see him again after an amazing night. Then the next night he came back, that’s when I started to feel myself falling in love with him.

    “I can do that,” i whispered, looking down at my hands in his.

      “Good,” he exhaled. He laced his fingers in mine, “then we’re going to eat.”  He brought my hand to his lips, placing a soft kiss on the back of it. Then he grazed his lips over my knuckles, placing soft random kisses across them. “Then,” his voice became deeper as he spoke , “I’m going to make you cum as many times as I possibly can.”

     A soft moan left my lips, I immediately felt myself starting to get wet. I bit my lip as I thought about how good he could make me feel. It had been so long since he’s touched me, I missed his calloused fingers, his tongue, and especially his cock. I swallowed hard as i thought about the first time we had sex all those years ago, he made me climax three times before he even slipped into my folds. No one had ever made me cum before, only myself. I was always shocked at the way Joe could make me fall apart with the ease.

     “Sound good, love?” he said, his voice back to normal, snapping me back to reality. I never knew how he could say something that made me so weak in the knees and then go back to normal like nothing happened.

      I nodded and cleared my throat, “sounds great,” my voice cracking at the end.

     He gave me a quick kiss before he dropped my hands, “let me finish this up, all right?” He said gesturing toward the stove.

     He walked away and tended to the food. I took a deep breath as I moved towards the refrigerator, grabbing the ingredients for the martini. I heard him humming as he cooked. I looked back at him, it was nice seeing him home again. It felt like he had never left, everything was suddenly back to how it’s supposed to be.

     I grabbed the cocktail shaker from on top of the refrigerator, filling it almost to the brim with ice. I opened the cabinet next to the fridge and grabbed two martini glasses and some tooth picks. I opened the bottle of vodka and poured it into the now frosty shaker.  I added a very small splash of vermouth to the vodka. That was part of my secret, most people don’t add any vermouth to a dirty martini. Then i added a generous amount of brine from a jar of olives before letting a few fall into the shaker. I remember him saying ‘make it as filthy as possible,’ when he ordered. Not knowing how to make a dirty martini more dirty, i began to shake his with a couple of olives.

      I grabbed a glass and popped it on the top of the shaker, snapping it into place with the side of my fist. I brought it up and began to shake it quickly. Once I was happy with the amount it was shaken, i hit the side of it with the heel of my palm to release the cup from the shaker.

     “Ya still got it, babe,” I heard Joseph say behind me. I looked over my shoulder to see him looking back at me with a small smile on his lips. I rolled my eyes and smiled back at him. Joe was always impressed with my bartending abilities. I bartended to pay my way through college and had gotten really good at it. I had done it for so long that it felt like second nature to me, I didn’t have to think about my movements while I made a drink.

    I grabbed the strainer and popped it on top of the metal shaker and poured the liquid in the glass. I was impressed that I had the exact amount to fill both glasses to the brim. I grabbed to tooth picks and poked them through the olives, two for Joe and one for me.

    I carefully grabbed the glasses and walked to Joseph. His face lit up as he saw me handing him his glass. He took it and lifted it towards me, “cheers, love.”

     “Cheers, handsome,” i whispered as we clinked glasses. I brought the glass to my lips and sipped the drink. The drink was strong, cold, and delicious.

   Joe hummed as he took a gulp, “the fucking best,” he said as he sat his glass down.

    I smiled and stepped behind him, wrapping my hands around his waist. I rested my cheek against his back right below his shoulder blades. My hands ran over his stomach through the fabric of his shirt. I slipped my hands under the hem of his shirt, humming when I felt his bare stomach against my fingers. I traced my fingertips up his happy trail, earning a shiver from him.

     We sat there in a nice, calming silence as he cooked and i continued to rub my hands on his soft skin. The only sound was him cooking and the soft humming I could feel vibrating through his chest.

     “Babe,” he said, making me jump.

     “Yes, my love?” I asked, placing a kiss to his back.

    “Mind helping me?” He said.

    I nodded as i dropped my hands from his belly.  I came next to him and he gestured to the parsley on the cutting board next to him. I grabbed a big drink of my martini and picked up the knife. I rolled the parsley and began chopping.

   Joseph placed his empty glass down, “another?” I asked.

     “Yes please,” he smiled at me.

     I finished chopping, threw back my drink, and made another. I felt a slight buzz, realizing how long it had been since I drank anything stronger than a glass of wine.

    I sat our glasses in our spots at the table. “Ready?” Joe asked.

    I nodded, i walked over to him to help carry the food to the table. He grabbed my shoulders stopping me. “What?” I asked.

    He turned me around and walked me back to the table, “i got it, just sit down,” he said. He grabbed the back of my chair and pulled it out for me.

    “Such a gentleman,” i said as I sat.

    He brought the food over as I placed my napkin in my lap. He portioned some roasted potatoes, vegetables, and chicken onto my plate before adding it to his. He looked down and frowned as he sat, grabbing my ankle. He placed my foot on his lap and unzipped the boots I forgot to take off. He slipped them off and gave a squeeze to my foot before doing the same to the other. “Better?” He asked.

     I nodded and said, “thank you,” leaning in and giving him a kiss.

    We sat and ate, talking about everything. He told me all about being on set, and i happily listened. I missed hearing him tell me stories, even when he laughed his way through it; his laughter making it nearly impossible to keep up. I could listen to him forever. The way his eyes light up and his face is so expressive.

    When we finished I thanked him for cooking and grabbed our plates taking them to the sink. I began rinsing them when I felt him behind me, his hands on either side of the counter trapping me against him.

     “What do you think you’re doing?” He asked.

      “Babe, you cooked, the least I can do is take care of the dishes,” i said.

        He moved my hair from my shoulder, exposing my neck. I shivered when i could feel his breath on my neck. He chuckled and started to place soft open mouth kisses along my skin, pausing to suck a soft mark on the sensitive spot right below my ear.

     I moaned and leaned my head, exposing more for him. He softly bit down, making me hiss and drop the plate i was rinsing into the sink. “Shit.” I gasped when his hand travelled down my sides.

     “Go to the room, want ya naked,” he whispered against my skin, “I’ll be there in a minute.

________________________________________________________________

Thank you so much for reading! I will hopefully have part two (be prepared for the smuttiest smut you’ve ever read) posted by this time tomorrow. I love you all. 

[thedrarrylibrarian]

Hiii I hope you're well! I just watched pride and prejudice (2005) for the first time and now I'm looking for all the drarry PaP AUs I can find. Do you happen to know any? Thank you in advance

It’s a truth universally acknowledged that librarians love Pride and Prejudice! This is a fun request and I most ardently loved putting this list together for you. I hope your dance card isn’t too full because your holds have arrived!

Pride and Prejudice Vibes

A Truth Universally Acknowledged by @aedwritesfic (2,479 words, rated T)

Bored out of his mind during quarantine, Harry joins the virtual book club hosted by the hot new librarian in Godric's Hollow.

I Hardly Know by cathcer1984 (6,934 words, rated T)

Harry Potter does not like Draco Malfoy. At least that's what he tells himself.

The Pleasure of Understanding You by drarryisgreen (11,990 words, rated E)

An adaptation of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice.

A Truth Universally Acknowledged by @sorrybutblog (17,363 words, rated M)

A year out from the war, Harry agrees to accompany Hermione on a historical walking tour of Pride and Prejudice. Not in the itinerary: running into Draco Malfoy, setting off a summer of stately homes, lavish parties, resentful shagging, and maybe, falling in love.

amid this warm and steady sweetness by @forestgreenlesbian (21,182 words, rated E)

Harry is not living in a period drama, no matter what his friends or his new house or Malfoy’s sudden affinity for horse-riding might suggest, and if one more person uses the word courting, he’s going to start hexing people.

Romp and Circumstance by @wolfpants (35,505 words, rated E)

Since the war, Harry Potter has gone from Saviour to Scoundrel—not that he’s complaining.

With a schedule full of gorgeous men, alcohol, and late nights, why would he want to change? Enter Draco Malfoy: beautiful, sharp, and completely untouchable. When Draco comes to Harry with a proposition to help him attract an engagement, Harry’s up for it—after all, how hard can it be not falling for his former nemesis?

Very hard, apparently.

Recompense & Reparo by sablier_sarcelle (48,981 words, rated E)

And Mr. Draco Malfoy, pureblood wizard whose reputation has certainly been slandered by The War (and perhaps even by his own actions in said war) has a plan. A list of five steps to restore the Malfoy family to its proper place in society.

That is until Harry Potter comes along and mucks it all.

A Regency AU, in which there are ungloved touches, letters, meddling mothers, and hope that love can somehow find a way.

❤️ As always, if you find a fic you enjoy, please remember to leave the author a kudos or a comment! ❤️

Lots of Love and Happy Reading!

[sitp-recs]

hi love! i would hate to overwhelm you with a new ask BUT... i kind of binge-read all the fics you recced for that one anon who asked for short fics (like 15k and below) in a concerningly short amount of time, so... i have come to shamelessly beg for more :3 i am entirely too besotted with your blog and your taste in fic is simply *chef's kiss*, there is no one else i'd rather ask for this (this is it this is me begging) THANK YOU IN ADVANCE, YOU ABSOLUTE GODSEND xx

Hello my darling, and thanks so much for the kind words and for trusting my fic taste! I had so much fun putting that first bedtime reclist together and it was a pleasure to build another one for you ❤️ this one includes some light angst (happy endings only!), hope that’s okay? Heres another full month of bedtime reads!

halcyon days by @the-starryknight (2020, T, 1.4k)

Sleepy mornings caught while the sun rises are reserved for silly word games and soft touches and feelings.

Almost-but-not-quite by @pineau-noir (2020, G, 2k)

Immediately following the Battle of Hogwarts Draco Malfoy stumbles across the last Time-Tuner in existence.

Secretly, between the shadow and the soul by @teacup-tai (2021, T, 3k)

The thing about surrender is that once you accept the unavoidable rhythm of change, the surprising uncontrollability of life, and the astonishing inevitability of feelings, it is easy.

Out to Sea by @onbeinganangel (2021, T, 3k)

A story about what happens when you cast your net and catch more than expected.

Between the Power Lines by @tackytigerfic (2020, M, 3k)

For Harry Potter, all roads eventually lead to Draco Malfoy.

Enjoy the Silence by @shealwaysreads (2021, M, 3.4k)

Draco stops speaking, gets some tattoos, and discovers that Harry’s happy to be quiet with him.

Living It Up (while you're going down) by @phd-mama (2019, E, 3.8k)

Draco's been yearning for Harry Potter for years, but somehow the time has never been quite right...until tonight.

Sun Stroke by @peachpety (2020, E, 4k)

Draco, Harry, and a handful of friends take a summer holiday at the beach.

The Study of Change by @p1013 (2021, M, 4k)

Harry's going to hell. He's going to hell immediately.

Special Affinity by @skeptiquewrites (2020, E, 4k)

Auror partners Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy seem to have a special affinity for getting into convoluted accidental bonds.

Home is Where the Nifflers Are by @primavera-cerezos (2020, G, 4k)

Draco has a soft spot for animals with nowhere to go; soon his and Harry's small flat is bustling with adorable, semi-dangerous creatures.

Dinner and Diatribes by @ohdrarry (2021, E, 5k)

Socialising isn't Harry's thing. Draco does his best to help.

Garden War by @cibeewastaken (2020, T, 5k)

Harry and Draco are quarantined in their houses, a lake across from one another.

Still Warm, Still Warm by @tsauergrass (2021, G, 5k)

Harry is up to something. Why else would he keep giving Draco presents?

It Never Occurred to Me That I Would Fall in Love With a Frenchman by lamerezouille (2013, T, 6k)

Harry kisses Draco in a public place. All hell breaks loose.

All Tied Up by mynameisthunder (2020, M, 6k)

Blaise is determined to find out why the entrance to the Slytherin common room is acting up all of a sudden.

Stay (With Me) by @dorthyanndrarry (2021, M, 6.5k)

Harry and Draco have been seeing each other casually, whenever they bumped into one another at Galas and Balls and other social events, always keeping one another at a careful distance.

Crystal Clear by @icmezzo (2014, T, 6.7k)

Harry customizes a snow globe. Draco listens to centaur weather reports. Ron investigates the height of Pansy’s boots. And Hermione knows even more than everything, as usual.

(Un)Calculated Risk by @l0vegl0wsinthedark (2017, E, 7k)

He thought about the way Harry looked at him, smiled at him; about the way Draco’s head was nearly always full of him, all day every day, and about the way Draco sometimes deliberately went to bed still smelling of him, refusing to acknowledge what it meant – because he already fucking knew what it meant.

in a rambling way by @fw00shy (2021, T, 7.5k)

Ron knocked Hermione up, and now Harry's got to figure out how to clone himself so that his friends don't split up fighting over him. Falling for Draco again was never part of the plan.

check this hand 'cause I'm marvelous by @lqtraintracks (2014, E, 8k)

Harry's had a crush on Malfoy for months now. But it will take a bar full of his friends, some Firewhisky, wagers made on his behalf, and Malfoy himself to get him to act on it.

It's Not a Passing Fascination by @firethesound (2018, E, 9k)

One of Harry's favourite things is watching Malfoy work.

Marginal Notes by @blamebrampton (2010, G, 9k)

When you’re 18, and nothing is as it was meant to be, sometimes it can be hard to let the right people know what you are thinking.

Stand Back: I'm About to Perform Archaeology by Blowfish_Diaries (2018, E, 10k)

A new Muggle Studies professor takes the Eighth Year students to work on an archaeological excavation.

The Loathly Worm by Selden (2016, E, 12k)

When Draco Malfoy is forced to go undercover among the remaining Death Eaters in the aftermath of the war, the last person he expects to find there is Harry Potter.

Rumor Has It by emmagrant01 (2012, E, 11k)

Auror trainee Harry Potter does not have a crush on Draco Malfoy. He's just curious about why a former Death Eater is working for the Wizengamot, and that's all. Really.

Polar Night by hereticalvision (2012, E, 12k)

Still in recovery from their break-up, Harry and Draco must travel through the arctic conditions of Svalbard to catch the last Death Eater still at large.

In Which Harry is Magnetic North and Draco Is An Idiot by bryoneybrynn (2014, T, 13k)

For as long as he can remember, Draco’s been bringing fake dates to his family’s annual Yuletide celebration in order to evade his mother’s matchmaking.

Harry Potter and the Werewolf Consultant by 0idontknow0 (2014, E, 15k)

After Teddy transforms into a werewolf for the first time Harry and Andromeda don’t know what to do.

Lockdown Lurgy by @xanthippe74 (2020, T, 15k)

When a dangerous virus comes to Britain, the Ministry orders a mandatory lockdown to control its spread.

Hey, Potter by SunseticMonster (2013, M, 16k)

Harry returns to Hogwarts for his 8th year, determined not to let Malfoy get to him.

[artificialstrontium]

dsmp finale spoilers, discussion of abuse

Ok so this rambling might be a tad unorganized but here’s my thoughts: The ending has been worked on for a long while now, so it’s not to say that it’s rushed. But seeing other’s reactions, it didn’t come across or land right, a miscommunication on the writer’s end (as I know people have been very vocal about making sure Tommy knows what a character like this means). 

That was a tragic ending. I know cc Tommy said he wanted his character to have a soft ending, and surface level it is that (having a do-over without pain is a wonderful thought, no?), but i can see why people are upset over a victim coming to an understanding and even unknowingly starting a friendship with his abuser, as well as spending his last moments believing he was just as in the wrong as his actual fuckin abuser. These topics deserve respect when handling on account of everyone whose reality is like c!Tommy’s. And there’s no way Tommy messing around at the start is equivalent to the pain inflicted on him by c!Dream ( & c!Dream planting evidence against c!Tommy before the house burning?helloo??). I’ve seen people say maybe what Tommy was going for was leaving his character’s character good and intact, like a superhero movie, or others pointing out that understanding isn’t necessarily forgiveness. Unfortunately, superhero movies don’t always equate perfectly to real life, people don’t always get the choice to do that or take the morally high road, whatever that is. 

Also from Tubbo’s POV, that’s not a fun ending! He tried so hard and failed to reach his friend in time, and all he could do was wait for the inevitable (not that c!Tubbo was ever guaranteed a good ending). Not to mention there’s loose ends everywhere. (can be taken into account IRL reasons for those loose ends, such as cc’s getting back to their normal lives after quarantine and that stall)

It can be said that stories can have tragic endings, some stories are made to make the reader uncomfortable so they check their understanding of the world (still, fuck Brave New World, me an my homies hate Brave New World). Some stories have a terrible or tragic ending of a season, have a hiatus, and roll right into a new one, which is where some cc’s are probably thinking in terms of lore (off the top my head, SPN season 5 bc it genuinely was supposed to end there and some of the middle seasons of GOT). But I think to the cc’s themselves, it’s also worth pointing out having too much of one thing (c!Tommy being a victim of abuse and never really getting a lasting win, unresolved things with other characters now that we know what happens to the DSMP) is draining to a lot of people in this audience, and that many people have been hoping for a good place to leave off before hopping to other fandoms. 

It can also be said the DSMP was never guaranteed a good ending, writing-wise or feelings-wise (I'll argue there’s a difference), taking in the fact it started out not as a story-based thing.

I’m generally a positive person, so what I’m choosing to do is stick around, wait for that alt stream because cc Tommy said earlier he’d chat about c!Dream being a fucking nightmare of a person. I’ll see what they do for volume two (because it can’t be all if “the dsmp will return” and ���This is not the end...” is to be believed), if it’s a complete memory wipe situation or if they slowly regain memories (I can’t be sure, but c!Tubbo calling c!Tommy cheese-haired makes me have hope someone remembers or they’ll do something with that). (For the sake of transparency I will also say that honestly a lot of this writing piece is me making sense of that ending and trying to distract that it made me feel a bit ill).

I’m sorry to the people who were sticking around for just this ending before leaving, I’m sorry you are going on such a bitter note, and I’m genuinely sad for the people whose pain is renewed with an ending like that. 

The DSMP means a lot to me, as someone who’s been watching since before it was a month old. I’ve seen people say this, so I’ll say it here too, but these characters, their stories, also belong to us, the fans. The writers can write whatever ending they want, but in the end, if what you want to take away from a story is just the characters and their middle journey, and continue creating because you loved that part only, all the power to you! If any of that makes sense, lol. 

[honey-milk-depresso]

TWST Stuck with Octavinelle

Personal request my friend wanted me to do Octatrio in quarantine. Hope you enjoy!

Azul Ashengrotto

This man is somehow still working through quarantine-

“Business shall still thrive, s/o.”

Yeah right, you need a break honey-

GET INTO BED AND SLEEP DAMNIT

Ok ok, but no problems with school work 

I mean he knows everything come on-

Breakfast? Lunch? Dinner? Dessert? 

He’s cooking for you every. single. day.

Because he cares about you

Will not serve you octopus unless you want it another way if you know what I mean-

AHEM-

It is time,

to     t a r a n t e l l a *cues the sparkles*

I know his family’s Italian restaurant would have some event

and they would do this famous Italian dance during the event

You cannot change my mind-

This man has style

Damn-

Look at those moves-

S/o, I’m sorry this has become a competition now-

But he gently kiss you cuz my lord he’s so sappy and cheesy

But I know you like it-

We all love a sappy octopus-

But ok, he does not regret being stuck with you

Times with him during quarantine are simple and sweet 

AHHHH IM CRYING JOY-

Jade Leech

My lord this man-

STOP SMIRKING AGSGSKGSKGS-

He was so smug when he heard your stuck with him.

“Oya oya? s/o stuck with me and Floyd? Well isn’t this going to be interesting~”

I SAID STOP AHHSJBSMDMBGJ

This man cooks you things that are not on the menu

Totally original and 5 star michelin star quality

Mushroom risotto

Now you must be wondering,

his terrariums

surely he went overboard, right?

Oh no non no,

it went     i n s a n e

and he dragged you in it

The entire place is just FILLED WITH PLANTS AND FUNGI

the room basically became a farm

Floyd for once is shrinking in fear-

You and him though gardening together was so wholesome-

He looked so happy with his terrariums and you being happy makes him even more happy-

I CANT IM SORRY IM CRYING -

You thought Floyd has mischief genes?

Sorry hun, it’s family passed down-

And that includes Jade.

His pranks aren’t as bad as Floyd’s though-

Overall being stuck with Jade is fulfilling and...interesting.

Yeah, interesting.

Floyd Leech

Oh dear-

I wish you luck my friend-

“Floyd, why is there a water balloon on Jade’s door?”

“Don’t worry about it, koebi-chan~”

I AM WORRYING, FLOYD-”

Pranks go back and forth 24/7

Sometimes and somehow he manages to prank Azul

Whether physically somehow or online when Azul wants the twins to google meet him.

“ FLOYD WTF-”

“Floyd, please don’t hack into Azul’s computer.”

“But it’s fun~”

Yes it is

But for the sake of Azul we don’t say a thing

and we can’t tell him he’s funny-

CUDDLE FEST!

Without fail

Like, it’s a m u s t

As if he’s gonna self destruct if you don’t cuddle him.

Jade’s the one cooking for you two-

But if he’s in a good mood, he might cook for you!

Actually real good food not lying

So much giggling and funny shit going on everyday when you’re with Floyd.

Being stuck with him is fun and never boring!

[marvelouslytrekking]

26: “ I’m dying. ” with Bones??

Promise Me

Summary: You catch an unknown alien disease that is spreading through your body rapidly without much hope. Word Count: 1231 Warning: Mention of disease, mention of death, no medical knowledge or reasoning whatsoever. It's fiction just go with it. A/N: Listen I almost went with something just cute and fun and light but then this came to mind so this is what you get. Think of it as payback for that Din fic! Hope everyone enjoys some angst!

It started as just a light cough, really nothing that was even bothering you. You were working on some old parts in engineering and assumed that you had just inhaled too much of the dust, really nothing to worry about.

However, the coughing only seems to get worse, and you soon found it hard to even breathe. You thought maybe trying to take a sip of water would help but it only caused a coughing fit that you couldn’t seem to stop. Luckily another engineer heard the commission when you fell over as you tried to catch your breath.

Before you knew it a med team was in front of you offering oxygen through a mask. It seemed to help a little, giving you the chance to calm your breathing down, but it still felt as though your throat was almost fully closed.

As you were rushed into Medbay you saw Leonard out of the corner of your eye, you could see the tension in his body. Protocol didn’t allow him to treat you, but you had full faith in Dr. M’Benga.

“We’re gonna have to put you under, it’ll help to relax your throat and lungs.” He calmly informed you as you continued to cough. You were soon injected with a hypo and immediately felt the effects.

You woke up feeling worse than you ever had in your life, like a truck had run you over and then backed up and ran you over again. Maybe even just an entire starship hitting you would feel better than this.

“Hey you’re awake!” You heard the relief in Leonard’s voice. “How’d you feel?”

“Like death personified”

“You’re well enough to be your dramatic self I see.” He chucked, but you didn’t miss the concern and worry that was laced in his voice.

“What’s wrong with me?” You asked, hesitantly.

“You seemed to have picked up an alien virus, we’re not sure exactly what it is.” He told you as gently as he could.

“Why am I not quarantined then?” You asked, concerned for the rest of the crew.

“We already determined it isn’t contagious. You seemed to have got it right from the source.” He assured you.

“But I haven’t been on any away missions lately.”

“We know. M’Benga thinks it has just been dormant in your system for a while, and something must have triggered it. We have no idea where you got it from.” He told you, you could tell that it was definitely bad news.

You wanted to continue to ask him more questions but you also knew that he technically wasn’t even your doctor and M’Benga would be in shortly so you only nodded in response.

“Do you mind if I step out? I need to check on some of the tests that they ran, I just didn’t want to leave your side,” Len asked you softly. You chuckled, you were sure he hadn’t known what to do with himself, between wanting to never leave you but also wanting to work, you’re sure he had been antsy.

“Go, I will be here when you’re done.” You told him, ushering him away.

It wasn’t long after that M’Benga had came in to check on you. “Good to see you awake,” He smiled as you saw you slightly prompt up on the bed. “How are you feeling?”

“Like someone ran me over with a shuttle.” You told him truthfully, though it didn’t cause him to laugh as you had expected.

“I am assuming Leonard told you a little about what’s going on.” He asked you.

“Yes, said I contracted an alien virus and that you don’t know where I got it from.” You relayed back to him what you knew.

“Yes, that’s true.” He nodded, “What I am sure he left out was how bad it truly is. As your doctor I think it’s only fair if you know the whole truth.”

“Okay,” You nodded, not sure what to say. You had known it was bad, Leonard’s body language had given it away, but that only caused you more unease.

“The virus is attacking your organs, and it is moving rapidly. We are working on slowing down it’s trajectory while we figure out how to stop it and then we can work on reversing any damage, but I have to be honest it is moving much quicker than we had hoped.” He told you with a solomon voice.

“How long,” You asked, trying to keep your voice calm.

“I’m afraid only a few days until you won’t be able to function, or be alert, and then after that only a few more days at most.” He informed you, “I am so sorry, but know that we are doing everything in our power to get this figured out. It is all hands on deck until we get you back on your feet.”

You nodded, not sure you would be able to speak if you tried. You were trying to wrap your head around only having a few days left. While you were left to process a lot of information M’Benga ran a few tests and did everything he could to make sure you were comfortable.

The next few hours of your day were spent with many visitors, you could tell everyone was trying to avoid the obvious that this may be the last time you see them, but it was still on everyones, including yours mind.

You were relieved when Leonard finally made his way back in the room. He had poked his head in a few times to see you but not long since you had had so many other visitors.

“You must be exhausted.” Leonard pointed out as you tried to keep your eyes open.

“Very,” You admitted, “Can you come lay with me?”

“I don’t think we’ll both fit comfortably,”

“I don’t care. I just want you close.” You told him. The idea that you may only have one more day with Leonard was dawning on you.

“Okay,” He sighed, carefully crawling into the bed with you. He made sure that he wasn’t hurting you and you in turn curled into him as much as you could.

“I um, Leonard, I think we need to talk about the next few days.” You break the comfortable silence.

“What do you mean?” He asked as he ran his fingers gently along your arm.

“I just, I want you to know how much I love you, but I also need you not to blame yourself and I need you to promise me you wont shut everyone out. I need to know that you’ll be okay.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Leonard said defiantly.

“Leonard. I am dying.” You sighed, “I just need to know you’ll be okay.”

“No one is dying on my watch.”

“Len,”

“No, if I can bring Jim back from that much radiation then, the hell if I can’t cure an alien disease.” Leonard said, his hold tightly on you ever so slightly.

“But if you can’t. I need you to promise me you won’t blame yourself.” You told him, “Please just promise me that.”

“It won’t come to that.” He said desperately.

“Promise me anyway.”

“Okay, I promise, love.” Once you heard those magic words, you were able to let yourself drift off to sleep in his arms for what was possibly the last time.