#honks clown nose

[a-two]

Experiment

[nation-wide-is-bi-your-side]

we always talk about trent’s Heart Eyes but what about ted’s huh? huh? what about ted looking at trent like he hung the moon and stars? what about ted looking at trent like he’s the single most important person in the world??? can we talk about That Please

[alteredsilicone]

ah fuck event affinity booster time to level my necramechs

[gaiatan]

High Fantasy Hunks

[hopeswells]

You know what? I bet Margaret and Philip Buckley would get along great with Tommy.

In fact, if they had to choose a man for their son to date, it would actually probably be Tommy Kinard.

He insists on calling Evan by his proper name, for one. He doesn't encourage any of Evan's silly shenanigans. He agrees with them that Evan is too excitable and that he should learn to tone it down. And whenever Evan starts going on about his firehouse found family, Tommy helps remind him that he already has a real family.

Tommy speaks their (passive aggressive) language fluently – something Evan never quite managed to pick up – and he's a fair bit older too, which means that they can trust him to keep Evan in check.

Yeah, the Buckleys would happily give Tommy their seal of approval.

[front-facing-pokemon]

[galedekarios]

💜

[nyxofdemons]

THIS IS THE ONLY THING THAT HAS EVER MATTERED

[lavampira]

glamtober day #19 — magic

weapon: augmented lunar envoy's staff [sky blue] head: scion rogue's bandana [no dye] body: troian cloak of casting [no dye] hands: republican signifer's fingerless gloves [jet black] legs: edenmete chausses of casting [no dye] feet: yorha type-53 thighboots of casting [no dye] ears: azeyma's earring

[gorjee-art]

There was an assignment to write emails to my classmates and I frankly…am very clever and so funny.

[themgfujoshi]

News flash: local clown get chased and threatened romantic advances By emo and goth warlords

Said clown that night:

[eddiebuckley-diaz]

Bathena discovering a bomb on their cruise -

Buck and Eddie having their first moment involving a bomb…

Bathena holding hands as the ship is going down -

Buck and Eddie holding on to each others hands when Buck was stuck under the ladder truck and Eddie was dragged under the ladder truck after being shot…

Hmmmmm

[kittysawat]

:)

[dragons-and-ages]

I am well aware that I’m delusional, but here’s how Varric-mancers can still win in 2024

But he’s not a companion.

Yeah, so? While he may not be an active companion, he appears to be taking an advisory role. Perhaps he’s a liaison between the Veilguard and the Inquisition remnants. If he is an advisor, that wouldn’t preclude him from being a romance option. See: Josie and Cullen.

But BioWare is going to kill him off.

ngl this prospect scares me.

I’ll admit that he is giving one-week-to-retirement vibes. But maybe he’s just tired of being in the field after so many years. He’s getting older; He doesn’t need to be slogging through the muck with us when his most formidable weapons are pen and paper.

But if he was going to be romanceable, he’d have been an option in an earlier game.

Not necessarily. Again, see: Cullen. It took three games for Cullen to be romanceable, which made sense! Cullen, as a character, was very much NOT mentally in a place that he would be open to romance in DAO and DA2. I’d argue the same for Varric, which I’ll get into below.

But it makes more sense for Varric to romance Hawke.

It’s true that Hawke and Varric are besties. Varric is clearly ride-or-die for Hawkes of all flavors. Varric has also known Hawke longer than any of the other protagonists. However, during those formative years in Kirkwall, Varric was very much still stuck on Bianca. (And let’s not deny that Hawkes of all flavors are also messy). Varric built an intentional wall between himself and Hawke or, you could argue, between himself and the character, the Champion of Kirkwall. See, Varric is a writer and he has a way of idealizing and romanticizing life and the people around him.

Being the teller of the story allows him to be in some kind of control.

Ok, but Varric couldn’t romance the Inquisitor.

That was even more implausible than Hawke. Again, Varric seems to see the people around him like story characters. The Inquisitor, the Herald of Andraste, is this big, potentially tragic, hero figure. DAI takes place over a shorter period of time than DA2, and while you may be able to build a friendly relationship with him, there is still clearly a wall there. Not to mention, he’s still comfortably pining for Bianca until the ‘Well, shit’ quest.

But Varric is in love with Bianca.

Bianca Davri. Gorgeous and brilliant dwarven woman voiced by Laura Bailey. It’s hard for my bi ass not to love her on those points alone. She has an amazing mind and is the only surface dwarf ever to be nominated for paragon status because of her inventions. She and Varric had a romance and were forced apart by the Merchant’s Guild before she was betrothed to a guy in the smith caste. And in the years since, the two of them have kept up a secret correspondence. Tell me all of that doesn’t smack of tragic storybook doomed romance. Of course Varric was stuck on her. Not to mention, he has carried around one of her inventions ever since; one that he named after her.

I think that, in the years since they were forcibly separated, Varric built up an idealized version of Bianca in his mind. You can see he does that to a certain extent with everyone. He separates himself, the writer, from the characters. Sometimes an old hurt is safer than opening up again and Varric has been safe and comfortable with not entering into a new romance. And there’s always that sliver of hope, fed by secret letters, that he and Bianca could be together in the end.

But then ‘Well, shit’ happens in DAI and Varric walks away angry with Bianca after it is revealed that SHE is responsible for leaking the location of the red lyrium. I think (I hope) that this event has shattered the idealized version of Bianca that lives in Varric’s mind. I don’t know how much time has passed since DAI, but I hope that that revelation has started a chain reaction where Varric has reevaluated his relationship with Bianca and is finally ready to put that chapter behind him.

And here’s where my batshit delulu theory starts:

I propose that Bianca the crossbow breaks early on in the game. This would be symbolic of Varric moving from active companion to an advisor status. It’s a sign to Varric that it’s time for a change. On the romance front, it’s the final nail in the coffin of his pining after Bianca.

Rook and The Veilguard are a smaller group than the Inquisition. Stakes are still high, but there’s not this strange reverence for Rook like there was for the Inquisitor. And the group is small and intimate, not a massive, world changing machine like the Inquisition was. I can see Varric being surprised, but cautiously open to flirting overtures from Rook.

It has been so many years since Varric has really allowed himself to love and be loved. It’s been too long since he allowed himself to be a part of the story rather than telling it. He’s getting older now, maybe it’s time to let that chapter close and really try to live and love again.

It has the potential to be a very mature, slow burn, beautiful romance and I know I’m deluding myself but I want it so bad.

[insignificant457]

Red Rising characters as questionable lyrics from Taylor Swifts new album

(For legal purposes this is a joke)

Darrow:

Mustang:

Sevro:

Cassius:

Victra:

Lyria:

Lysander: