#honestly though this is so unfair
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Had the strength to go out for the first time in days today and I’m once again in agony. Gotta love this.
#/sar#honestly though this is so unfair#I miss the days where I’d be able to walk for 6+ miles and barely break a sweat#now I walk the mall and end up hardly mobile#I miss being able to do things!!!#the weather was so nice today and I was in too much pain by the time I got home to do anything other than sit outside for a bit#it’s just#ughhhh#chronic pain#degenerative disc disease#sciatica#spinal epidural lipomatosis#severe stenosis#spinal stenosis#young disabled#cw chronic pain
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Listen, both Yu Ziyuan and Jiang Fengmian were shitty parents that fucked their kids (& wwx) up in various different ways. But I will forever be more sympathetic to a frustrated woman in a patriarchal society stuck in a toxic marriage than to the man who has power and authority to change something but refuses to do it because he doesn't like conflict and pretends like nothing is wrong.
#also i am convinced that yzy was pressured into marrying jfm by her family#because even before wwx was there she had people call her madam yu instead of madam jiang which is the title she is entitled to#and frequently went on nighthunts to get away from her life in lotus pier#yu ziyuan#jiang fengmian#mdzs#let me be very clear though yzy still took her valid frustrations out on a child which is fucked up and wrong#what she did was abuse#but i get why she was angry#i do not get why jfm was so crappy to his children and honestly incredibly unfair to wwx#i might eleborate further with textual evidence if someone's interested
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I think I cried harder today over my dad's jackets than I did at his deathbed. That was a miserable time of course, a memory that will likely be seared into my brain until I die, but I cried... I think a normal amount, all things considered. More than I ever usually do of course, but I typically don't cry At All. All this free crying is certainly surreal.
The jackets, though. I was put in charge of doing his laundry, because we don't want to pack up dirty clothes. I was expecting it to be unpleasant bc my dad's dirty clothes - gross. But really, it was much more unpleasant in that... those were his. It felt wrong to touch them. Felt wrong to treat his jackets as gross. Because they were just his jackets. They weren't even in the hamper. And then I was remembering him wearing them, and then I was crying. Again. And again. Weeping over these damn jackets.
Then I found a shirt on his bed that still smelled like him. It smelled like a Hug From Dad. And that set me off crying even harder.
In total, I think I cried like 6 times within 40 minutes. It took me that long to finish sorting the damn clothes bc I just. Was a wreck. Like, what are you supposed to do when you're living life like normal, vaguely hopeful bc you're taking steps to secure your own happiness, and then 4 days later you're sorting your dad's laundry because he fucking died. Suddenly. Without a goodbye.
And you have to worry about his lack of a will (even under an ideal situation, only 2 heirs and no conflicts between us, probate's a fucking Bitch), and arranging the funeral, and prepping his obituary, and picking out pictures, and writing a speech bc you want to talk at his funeral, of Course you want to talk at his funeral, but even just thinking about anecdotes you could share has you crying yet again.
I've cried more times in the past 3 days than likely the entirety of last YEAR. And that's WITH my cat, and uncle, and family friend dying. Those all hurt, my uncle most of all, & I was real fucked up over it. But this? This was my Dad. Likely the person I'd have named 2nd closest to me in my life, second only to my sister. He wasn't perfect, but he did so much for me throughout my entire life. All he wanted was to raise us to be happy and independent. And he accomplished it, we're getting by without him, but we still wanted several more decades with him. He was only 57. We should've gotten several more decades with him.
But here we are now. Playing investigators to his life, digging into all his shit, trying to find documents and take inventory of all his things, and learning Many things about him in the process. In his lockbox of sensitive documents, like his SSN and birth certificate and all that stuff, we found an old letter. About a decade old now, written in my hand. Right at the very top, we found that he'd kept the letter I wrote to him telling him frankly about my struggles and the things I wanted him to do better. He kept it. He tried to take it to heart. He looked at it again, sometime more recently than all the rest of the documents. That was on top.
His love for us is evident everywhere. The pictures he has hanging up all over the place, majority of them with us in them. The old fathers day cards placed on display in his bedroom bookshelf. The gifts we gave him, even stupid little knick knacks, placed around his apartment with pride. I wish we'd taken more videos of him. I don't want to forget the sound of his voice. I don't want to forget his smell either, the smell of a Hug From Dad, but I still tossed that shirt into the wash even though it felt like saying yet another goodbye.
It's the suddenness that hurts the most, I think. We were planning on having him help me finally get my license this year. My final words to him, the last thing he would've seen from me, were messages asking up on whether he'd called his car insurance company to make sure there wouldn't be problems. I should've called him more. I don't know if I'm going to learn from this.
I cut my 2 weeks off early to have time to grieve and to work on things for the funeral and settling the estate. The last thing I'd wanna do right now is selling fucking bubble tea in a job I already decided to leave. So here I am without a job, though with potentially two life insurance policy payouts to come. Inheriting half his 401k. Inheriting couches, knickknacks, keepsakes, paintings, art pieces, maybe even his guitar and other furniture if we can figure out what to do about space (I don't have room for this furniture, I don't know if I even have room for the couches, but God do I want to keep so much of this furniture). It has me even considering keeping one of his guns, just one. A tiny little revolver, it sits so comfortably in my hand. I don't even want to use it for anything. I just want to have it, keep it stored in a drawer with its ammo kept separate. I don't like guns, but this is a part of him. He loved collecting guns. He was about as responsible with them as someone can be, keeping them locked in a lockbox and impressing upon his children the importance of gun safety (I've known the basic gun safety rules ever since I was a little kid. Of course, of course, of course.) It reminds me of him. It's horrifically easy to have a gun in Indiana. I apparently don't even need a permit to carry anymore. (I have no intention to ever carry this in public.)
It's all a cycle. Business, grief, thoughts about my future. Round and round, like the most nauseating carousel in existence. I don't know how I'm still so functional. My skills with compartmentalization have been my lifesaver.
And im just thinking about the story my dad's best friend shared today. About a friend of theirs who lost her father. She reached out after hearing about my dad to share his words with her: "it's okay to grieve, but don't make his death your life".
He explicitly referenced himself in this, saying if he were to die suddenly that he wouldn't want us to define ourselves by it. Grief is expected, but he wants us to be able to move on. He's always wanted us to establish ourselves and make ourselves happy. He wouldn't want to be a weight holding us back from that.
So every time I start to feel guilty for thinking about having nicer furniture or using his life insurance payout to fund the rest of my college, I remind myself of that. Thinking about the material isn't a bad thing. I'm only human. And in the end, he'd Want me to be thinking about it. He never intended to die, certainly not without warning like this, so he would've only encouraged me being pragmatic about it all.
He only ever wanted us to be happy. So I need to do what I can to live up to that.
I love him. I miss him already.
#speculation nation#negative/#this got really long on accident. but i think typing this out was really helpful for me.#getting the thoughts out. processing. the works.#nearly cried several times just from writing this.#...and honestly i might reference this again when i start seriously writing my eulogy.#things suck a Lot right now. and i really wish they were different.#feels like i picked a bad choice in a video game and am now seeing the Bad Ending or whatever#all i need to do is reload a previous save. it's all still there. perfectly preserved in my memories.#but... that's all gone. as suddenly and unfair as it is ive been thrust into a new chapter of my life so thoroughly.#it's not all bad though. he wasnt prepared for dying so it's been hell to prepare for him#we dont know if we'll even be able to get into his fucking iphone. stupid piece of shit.#but he had life insurance. he had a union job. and That comes with benefits#(something about a year's salary going to the family. aka half a year's salary to Me. and isnt That mind boggling.)#as much as it hurts im going to be realistic about it. im going to do what i need to finish my education.#and im going to use it as a springboard for finally becoming a 'proper adult'.#the kind who could own a nice kitchen fridge. one with an ice machine on the front of the door#and freezers in the drawers.#maybe then i could think about getting motorcyle lessons. not from my dad as i originally wanted#but i wanna keep the family biker spirit alive. i wanted it even before he died. and now i want it even more.#ive had so so many thoughts. it's only been 3 days. ive had to emotionally numb myself several times just to Get Through It.#everything is exacerbated. my mom wants to go to the funeral. we will have to fight her on this. my dad Hated her.#and i certainly dont fucking want her around either. not then. not when im talking about my dad.#(my dad. my Dad. i saw him die. i felt him cold. i do not regret it. it still hurts me.)#it's overwhelming. i loved him so fucking much. even with his flaws he was truly an amazing father.#i'll... shut up now. if you read this far. well. hug your loved ones a little tighter. you never know when youll lose them.
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Can you imagine if the French invaded Britain and killed a bunch of people displaced a bunch more and then shoved what was left into like. Aberdeen. And then bombed the shit out of Aberdeen for 75 years and didn't let anyone leave. And if you tried to get out they killed your whole family and called you a terrorist. And the whole world was like omg you're barbarians France has a right to defend itself even though that's literally not even France it's Britain, France just invaded and stuck French flags everywhere. And then France killed 20,000 people mostly British kids in like a month but if anyone says hey maybe France should stop killing the kids then they're anti-French and they support terrorism and genocide. That would be crazy right
#except aberdeen is bigger than gaza#so unfair comparison#and also probably offensive to gaza because aberdeen is a shithole#honestly though. saying this it like this to people often makes them pause and think about how crazy it all is#they see gaza as this far away problem and middle easterns as not human#applying it to them and their country seems to sort of make it click#which is disgusting that it takes that. but yk#is what it is#palestine#gaza#israel#free palestine
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"Bruce being violently protective of Selina" she doesn't need all that. she's fine at protecting herself nine times out of ten and, generally, fiercely independent (which has been one of the major obstacles between them). she also probably doesn't super love the fact that he can be violent & extremely reactive (in many stories saving her female friends or being fiercely protective of them because of the violence, which is also often of a sexual nature, that they face). just a hunch... I don't think she'd be like all that into it even though the superhero stuff obviously is sexy/cool at times right. she usually is less playing "oh woe is me damsel in distress" and more so playing "I'm being bad and you should chase me about it". let's be real. the dynamic is wrong if youre looking at the first one
#not that like. fiction cant be toxic and unhealthy right. and honestly they are. but to do it like this is So Boring and Sucks#just imo. peak batcat is returns. shes ANGRY that she could be saved by him. RESENTFUL of his privilege & wealth.#even though she knows hes a good man and finds his career as the dark knight super exciting. its not about attraction.#its about how unfair it all is. she has to be bad not bc she even did anything wrong. but bc a man had more power than her#bc shed spent her whole life trying to please men romantically.....and only now does she find love#she loves him. but she also believes its too late for her. and she doesnt want to be saved.#she did want to be saved a long time ago. before she died. before her life was revealed as meaningless to the ppl around her.#but she cant be that girl anymore. theres something dark and wrong festering inside her because of what shes been through.#and he cant make that go away.#and maybe she doesnt want it to go away. its what finally gave her the strength to stand on her own anyway.#and he doesnt understand this. he never could. hes always been a valuable man treated as a whole person by everyone around him.#this is why they have a really interesting push and pull
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I love how the primary cure for heat rash is Just Stop Being In The Heat :) which..... simply is not feasible for me rn!!!
#also wash the area BUT NO WASH TOO MUCH!!!#well im picking up poop and washing dishes all day (& the rash is specifically on my hands 😞) so my skin is constantly irritated#tbf i did misread the label on a lotion i was using which def made it worse but UGH y hasn't it magically cured in the 12 hours since? :(#its honestly really unfair because i have been SO! GOOD! about remembering my schewpid sunscreen while i've been more outdoors lately#thank the gay gods this breakout waited until after pride at least :/ i would really like it to clear by this weekend though#my leper hands are going to scare the ladies :((((#man as uncomfortable as i am/my situation is i cant help but think how much worse it must be for unhoused folks w sensitive skin#its not even that warm yet but imagine having heat rash with actual zero reliable place to escape heat or wash or store a good lotion...#fucking hate this country 😤😤😤
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GAHHH why do i keep seeing posts in the self ship tags that are against being uncomfy with sharing f/os ... theyre usually like chill(?) but last time i saw one that was super aggressive for no reason
#idk if you guys saw it too the one that was like AHHH YOU’RE BEING SELFISH!!! but maybe they were referring solely to those who#harrassed others over it. in which case i think they suck too but its so :| to see people be like#sometimes its like. there’ll be a post — someone would be like hey! are you okay sharing? and the op will be like#yeah ofc :) it feels like it’d be unfair of me not to & etc. GAHHH i know they don’t mean any harmmm okayyy but i don’t want people to think#this is a selfish or unfair thing to do lol honestly though i DO wish i were comfortable with sharing#given how incredibly popular those two are. sadly the [ it’s a different version of your f/o! ] doesn’t work on me#yes personal hcs & interpretation are a thing but to me its still on the same character so what difference does it make ...#and i couldn’t really go along with that way of viewing it#💭
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god fucking damn it
#eurovision#finland#sweden#esc#esc 2023#eurovison song contest#eurovision song contest 2023#i couldn't even watch it#one of my friends had to live post everything that was happening#when they just started sending puke emojis i knew it had happened#its honestly so unfair though like she already won once why is she allowed to compete again#this is bullshit. justice for käärijä#käärija
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man. my lyney just dropped 70k on his skill. i think that's the highest skill pop i've ever had on record
#⇢₊˚⊹ 🩷∥ruby∥yo,ide yo !!#i think it was max stacks but can't be sure#also for some reason i'm way more proud of my song of stillness on main than my first great magic on the alt#maybe it's because i worked so hard to get the stuff to forge it. and i visibly saw results after equipping it on him#while on the alt,even though he has 4pc marechaussee and his sig,his damage is still just passable at best#my alt is just really bad honestly#i'm seeing hope because i got him to drop 44k today while i was farming resistance books for benny boi#but yeah. basically everyone's artifacts REALLY need work#aside from that though#i'm almost ashamed of the first great magic i have equipped on lyney#even though i literally got it from grinding my ass off for freemos,it still feels almost unfair that i have it#it feels almost cheat-y that i have his bis. even though it literally isn't#the fact that a 100% f2p lyney (i.e. my main account) still outdamages a lyney with his bis set and bis weapon is a bit of bitter irony tho#maybe this is me realizing that i'd rather not whale for weapons actually#even if i did have that kind of money#i want to see how far an r5 song of stillness lyney can go#i might still not be above whaling to c6 him tho#which is kind of ironic cuz like. if i'm dropping enough money to get him to c6 then why not get at least one copy of his sig,right?#i don't really have an explanation tbh. i guess i just don't feel like pulling for his weapon. he already feels strong enough without it#i would still whale for a weapon for chongyun though#i think the difference is that he's a 4 star. and he needs all the help he can possibly get in the damage department#i want my chongyun to drop casual 100k's too ;-;#and then i could give dehya the wgs that he currently has to boost lyney's damage even further#anyway i got enough books to crown both bennett and kazuha on the alt#now all i need are treasure hoarder drops and mora
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Cool shot of a cool shooter or something idk I’m not an archer.
This is Faobo Yorasiz, and he’s originally one of my independent fantasy OCs, but I decided to try and see if I could make a good looking character model for him in Final Fantasy, and except for some small details, he gets really close to the original! So I guess I’ve got an Eorzea headcanon universe going on now.
Faobo may look edgy and shady af, but he is one of Aozhan Monbaro’s most trusted soldiers, and the idea here is that he isn’t actually the Warrior of Light (because Aozhan is, because who else), but pretty much something like a companion/side character, trying to find his Captain and help him save yet another world, and just solving a lot of the people’s smaller problems along the way. So while I will be playing the MSQ with him for the sake of unlocking content, he’s mainly meant to be a sidequest guy
#FFXIV#Final Fantasy XIV#Male Hyur#Hyur Midlander#Faobo Yorasiz#I love that I could give him his odd eyes#Idk how well they come out in this photo though#His right one is purple#and his left one is golden#He's one of my underrated babies#It's unfair because he's honestly so good#I wish I was popular enough for people to ask about my OCs lol
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@shamisense OH +++++1 HARD SAME
personally I don't mind daily or near-daily contact (since once I settle on a partner my intention long-term is to live with them and have to see them every day anyway), but even with someone I'm dating full-on text conversations every day or a constant asynchronous stream of texts with an expectation for quick reply would get exhausting for me very quickly and was one of the many reasons some of my previous relationships have been absolute nightmares for me
thankfully I think I finally may have met someone who is more my speed but I FEEL you that it's like #therearedozensofus and it's def not always easy to find
fwiw now that it's something I'm hyperaware of I've found that most dates are actually super receptive to talk about this if you just ask directly, like "how often would you prefer to text/call/meet up, and what does that look like for you in the early stages vs. a committed relationship?" it's been kind of very easy to weed out people who were obviously looking for much more frequent communication than I was tbh within like 1-2 dates
#shamisense#Reply#was literally just thinking about this actually bc coincidentally i also just had a tough conversation about this with my person#bc they mentioned kind of offland early on in the talking phase that they were Not a Good Texter™#and even though i am like that too i had such a hard time believing them bc I've been brain poisoned by all my past relationships#so i was like No. surely if they're not initiating texts there is something wrong and they don't actually like me that much.#and also *i* must Perform Normal Texting Rituals to show that i like them back too and am putting in an effort even tho i don't want to#but after having like an actual earnest discussion with them it turns out that no they really ARE just like that and WERE serious about me#and i was making assumptions about them that were super unfair AND tiring myself out for no reason and god they were so much more#generous about it to me than i honestly deserved#so now actually texting them is much less stressful and more fun bc the pressure is off and I can just enjoy the conversation without#worrying so much about the pace!#and we also compromised by agreeing to meet in person more frequently/hang out more casually since we're getting to be a bit more serious#but yeah communication preferences are. such a huge part of compatibility that I can't IMAGINE#putting myself through another relationship where we didn't align on this
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merl mei qi gets better with every appearance
#jojolion spoilers#in the tags#my hopes aren’t GREAT in terms of her making it out unscathed either aliveness wise or likeability wise#(though it’d take a lot more than her betraying the main cast to make me dislike her at this point LOL)#so. this too shall pass i suppose. but GOD she’s great at what she’s doing for the story and in the story. hope she has a stand.#kaato and her fulfilling my dream of morally gray jjba milfs lmao#(sighs in ‘kaato was done . just a bit dirty. like a miniscule particulate amount of dirty honestly all i’d change is how things were#literally ended’…)#(well ok i’m of the opinion that the entire final third of jojolion needed serious workshopping so her narrative could reasonabky use changi#changing A Lot but like judging by endgame jojolion standards i’d really just leave her and th.#goddamn. forgot his name. her FUCKING ex-husband in the same boat health-wise rather than her dying#like its really not that hard of a change plus i can imagine them throwing slurs at each other from across an emergency room fjtjhnhj#& as much as i ‘get’ her dying to defeat WoU working with her rejection of self-sacrifice earlier in the story i. also think that her#rejection of self-sacrifice was morally ambivalent enough that her coming to challenge herself on that#and do something dangerous as all hell to herself to save tsurugi AND still kill someone else in the process (girlboss) could be narratively#rewarded by her NOT actually dying still#like that’d. let us have it both ways. have our cake and eat it to. the enormous pressure on parents (mainly mothers) to destroy themselves#for the sake of their children IS unfair AND as a parent its still your responsibility to care for your (grand)kids at the expense of yourse#yourself. those being allowed to coexist would help with the parental themes jojolion had a Loooot imo#(itd even make sense with the half-baked ‘WoU is based around karma’ thing that comes up once. she approaches it which causes a counterattac#counterattack -albeit lessened already rhetorically- and then it still fails to kill her completely being It Was Doing A Good Thing For#On-The-Side-Of-Selfless purposes!)#anyways whoops this turned into a jojolion analysispost lol
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i think if boyfriend asmr wasn't such a weird medium, for lack of better term, it would be a lot more popular. but for one, people generally shit on bf asmr and those who listen to it and it's kind of a weird genre to get into and to expand upon seamlessly. because there's a listener, there's only so much expansion that character can have. and because it's not visual, that also turns a lot of people off
but yeah. i think if the channel was like tv show or smth it'd be so popular, erik is such a good writer. but i think having it be so minuscule on his little corner of the internet makes it better and more enjoyable for both him and audience (perhaps)
it sucks to see redacted views go down when erik is putting more effort than ever to make them good
but honestly i know why
eriks audios were in their prime during 2020 - 2021 era
that's when people were stuck inside and desperately needed company
that was the era of
flirty vampire and sadistic vampire fight over you
tsundere werewolf alpha
shy submissive fuckinnn uh bitch
traditional femcel / chronic y/n fanfic reader tropes, let's be so real here 😭
a lot of people were trying to find company and themselves during this era. and a lot of teens were there when they weren't supposed to be
but honestly, when we started being allowed to go outside, a lot of people moved on. talking to people irl, making connections, getting actual boyfriends
the people who came for those tropes left because those characters aren't hollow shells of that trope anymore
so many people have moved on coming out of lockdown or don't like that theres lore and its not judt about have shy submissives and dominant alphas anymore and it sucks
cos erik tries so hard and he puts in so much effort, redacted audio is clearly formed out of passion
he deserves better, yall
#i do wish it was more popular though#it's honestly so unfair i can't ramble about this to normal people without sounding like a psycho#but i like gatekeeping <3#sorry if this doesn't make sense#i didn't proofread 💀#redacted.txt#redacted fandom#redacted asmr#redacted audio#kae talks shit
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support group for restaurant managers spouses wya
#me: waited four days to see my gf again#gf: has to go in to work#Jesus FUCK uggggghfhfhfhsjcndkskc#so unfair#one time they said my loyalty should be to them not my job#i immediately dismissed it because it ain't ever gonna go the other way#honestly I might just go to bed I was gonna stay up for them but like#I'm tired and I'm tired of this and I know it's not gonna get any better#literally the only thing I was looking forward to all fucking day was to spend the evening with them#but noooOooOooO#like ik they don't wanna have to work rn either but ugh#anyway my light kit is cool#I wish I could show them though :)))))))
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Wow a mumensai high school au would actually be super easy to pull off
#they both got into a lot of fights with bullies back then so they could probably get sent to the nurse’s office at the same time and meet up#that way. from that point they might get some light small talk in and learn that they both have a similar way of standing up to people who#pick on others. and then they’d become friends and Saitama would find sataru kinda cool because he stands up for what is right even though#he gets hurt for it and he respects that (even though he finds it pretty unfair) and they get into fights and lose together <3333#Also Sataru is there for Saitama’s training arc and finds the dedication hot#and also also sataru would totally buy Saitama dinner as a way of going out with him and he knows Saitama wouldn’t refuse a free meal so#sorry for rambling I just enjoy this ship :> honestly though even platonically i think it’s good#they’re friends okay ‼️❗️
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Language Barriers
Based off the idea that Yuu doesn't speak the same language or have the same culture norms in their world!! Got inspired for once
Content Info: GN!, 4.6K words-ish, Fluff/Comedy, Platonic except in Kalim's, Aztec refs in Leonas, NSFW jokes in Heartslabyul, Staff being parents, Trey bullying
Characters: Mozus Trein, Divus Crewel, Dire Crowley, Ashton Vargas, Sam, Riddle Rosehearts, Trey Clover, Cater Diamond, Ace Trappola, Deuce Spade, Grim, Leona Kingscholar, Kalim al-Asim, Jamil Viper, Vil Schoenheit
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Since your arrival in Twisted Wonderland, you have begun to grasp the language and culture of this world. For the most part, at least.
You remember as clear as day when you first arrived, the pure confusion of the Headmage and those around you. Words from your lips were pure gibberish to them. They stared at you like you were an anomaly— and they were right. You are one.
‘Glitchy’ is the term they have used to describe your voice. “It is as though the sound around you warps everytime you speak.” The Headmage— Crowley— said.
The man had given you a necklace alongside an old dorm he housed you in. It was a simple looking necklace. A small mirror charm dangles in the center of it. Subtle enough to not draw attention to it.
It wasn't just a necklace however. It was a translator, a universal one.
The ‘glitches’ from your mouth had stopped and became the strange sounds the natives here spoke. Still, the necklace is just a buffer. Just because you can understand them doesn't mean you know what they're saying.
You still do not know the slang, the culture, the phrases, the grammar. Words still slipped your mind. You swear all you can hear is gibberish at times– and honestly you don’t doubt it occasionally is when students want to mess with you. You still had a lot to learn and there have been many miscommunications along the way. All part of the journey you suppose.
The staff here weren't coddling at all but they were accommodating. They made it clear that they favored no student more than the other. (At least that's what they claim.) But they also understood that holding you to the same standard would be unfair.
Mozus Trein
Professor Mozus Trein was a blessing when it came to learning about this world. His history classes made understanding this place easier. Trein would even give you extra context with his lessons to help you understand the everyday things and universal knowledge that you are unaware of.
His standards for your essays were different. He was no less strict on you but he was reasonable. He could tell that you truly understood the concept and put effort into your papers despite the language barrier and he is not going to punish you for learning.
You would get your paper back with a high grade and a page of corrections with explanations for each one. Why this comma here wrong. Why this was the wrong conjugation of that word. How this sentence could be improved.
“Excuse me, Professor?” You test the words as you speak them, accent slipping out. Trein looks to you from his desk. "Yes?”
“This word here is marked as wrong, but I remember you saying ‘I before E except after C.’” You tilt the paper to him and the older man adjusts himself on seat.
“Let me see here…” Trein paused to read the paper, expert eyes scanning for any potential mistakes. “Ah I see, that word there is an exception. ‘Sovereign’ doesn't follow that rule.” He closed his eyes as he explained and you nodded in understanding.
“I see, so I just have to memorize it. Are there any other words like that?” You didn't like how Trein seemed to frown as he thought about it. He hadn't realized how many there were. “Yes there are. A lot more than I anticipated I’m afraid,” a sigh escapes his lips and he shakes his head.
“I will not hold this against your grade since you have been improving with each assignment. Little mistakes like this will be forgiven so long as they are not repeated. Allow me to adjust your grade accordingly.”
You tilted your head as your B+ went to an A-. A small smile decorates your features. Trein nods to you and hands you your paper back. “There you are then. On to you next class.” You turn to leave but are stopped by when he speaks again.
“You should be proud of yourself, Yuu. You are the hardest working student I've have ever had the pleasure of teaching.” You perked up and your smile grew as you were onto your next class.
Divus Crewel
Professor Divus Crewel’s classes were difficult for completely different reasons. Math and numbers were the same for the most part aside from some minor symbol changes. Word problems were the bane of your existence however. Thankfully Divus can see that you understand the math. He'll often pass you or only take half a point off if you use the wrong equation or misunderstand the question and such.
He also gave you a small private lesson about alchemy as well. Teaching you the basic terms and proper protocols that most students would have learned early in their education. He'd show how to differentiate the effects an ingredient would have by the prefixes of their names or symbols on the vial.
But most importantly he would help you socially. What you should dress like for certain events. The correct way to speak so you could sound like a native. Social cues.
And he would refuse to admit it but you were his prized pup over the rest. He may or may not have slipped you a few perfumes or clothing under the guise of “Crowley not providing enough” or “Taking stress off of you to do better in class.” You knew better though.
After all, how could he play off giving a coat similar to his? It was less flashy and more suited to your tastes. It wasn't obvious to anyone else that you matched him unless they really observed. Perfect to wear in his class.
He's always looking out for you. Making sure you are safe and secure. And should you get injured from another adventure, he is there with a potion in hand.
Dire Crowley
Crowley was the one that gave you the necklace and a place to stay. Though eccentric and a bit well… lazy, you couldn’t deny that this was a good display of his generosity. Even if he does make you work for it.
Crowley was a strange one. He'd gift you some magical object one day and then forget you exist the next. He’d help you with your paperwork for accommodations and then forget to approve of them.
One time he dropped off a stack of paperwork on you to do for him but still left you a huge comprehensive guide that teaches you how to do each one. On top of that there was even a translation card meant to help you. If he put this much effort into these papers he'd be done by now. You assume he made this so he can drop more on you in the future. You swear he mentioned he's doing this to you to ‘prepare you for when you become the new headmage— er headmaster.’ Yeah right.
He'd give you dangerous tasks then become overprotective if any boy dare get too close to you. He'd help with anything but only if you stroke his ego. Yet despite it all he was still, as much as you hated to admit it, generous.
Despite everything, he has taken you in instead of abandoning you in this world. You swear sometimes he acts like a dad to you… When its convenient.
He's so annoying but you can’t find it in your heart to truly hate him. He may get you in trouble, but the moment it becomes too dangerous he steps in without hesitation to protect you and gives you a huge lecture after.
You hope you learn enough of the language to properly scold him.
Ashton Vargas
“Is this really necessary?” You ask the coach in front who re-wraps your hands tightly. “Absolutely it is!” The Coach's booming voice resonates in you as he pats you on your back rather roughly. “Give me another punch.”
You swallow and raise your hands again. You hesitate. “Come on kid you aren't gonna leave a dent in me!” You swallow and swing at his stomach. Vargas was right, he doesn't even flinch as your arm practically vibrates.
“That was a good form! I almost felt it.” A great guffaw rumbles in his chest. “Again!” Another punch, he looks down approvingly.
“Not bad, not bad at all. I sense a lot of potential in you, kid. That's enough for today.” You breathe a sigh of relief as you wipe your brow and unwrap your hands.
“Seems my training regiment is working, you're getting stronger by the day. Still— this on its own isn't enough. You need protein, kid! Lots of it. And you know what a good source of protein is?”
You stare at him for a moment. “Those uh…” the word slips your mind. “Chicken… capsules…?”
“Bingo! But they're called Eggs here Yuu.” Ashton puts a hand on his hip and makes a fist. “You should start with a dozen eggs per day and increase from there. I know that headmage can't be relied on to pay you in time, so I personally will deliver some bulking meals myself!”
“... Why are you doing this for me?” Your voice comes out a bit quiet as you speak. Ashton looks at you for a minute. “Why? Because you’re my student and I want to see you succeed. You got some serious strength hidden in you, and it would br a shame to see it wasted. Besides…”
As he speaks he starts taking down those punchy things, sandbags, you think. “The students here are quite rowdy. I want you to be able to defend yourself, especially since you don't have magic. You have to rely on brawn, Yuu! And I will be the one to awaken it.”
Vargas strikes a pose for a moment before relaxing. “Before you go I need to teach you some vocabulary.”
“Vocabulary…?”
“About your muscles of course!” The coach sat you down for a moment as he went into kinesiology. Micros and macros. Bulking. He broke it all down for you while flexing his muscles to emphasize his points.
“Now off you go Yuu, meet me here same time tomorrow, got it?”
Sam
Sam is a cool dude. You interact with him a lot. He never had an issue when you were first learning to speak. In fact he'd help you find the products you described to him. Of course he'd try and convince you to buy the more premium products but that's just business.
He'd even offer you a gig or two. His shelves don't stock themselves and his shadow friends wouldn't mind some extra help. Just know they can be a bit mischievous. While you were working you'd even get a small employee discount.
Even though your language has gotten better, there is still the occasional mix up.
“Ah, prefect! What can I do for you?” Sam queried while leaning on the counter top, delighted to see one of his favorite customers. “I am looking for… um…” You froze. What was that word again??
“The… white liquid?” You watched as Sam racked his brain for what you meant. “An invisibility potion?”
“No no! It's like… a juice?”
“Ah! I got it! Coconut milk!” The man snapped his fingers and winked. He frowned a bit when you shook your head.
“Wait here.” The shadow man watched as you ventured into the small smack aisle in front of him. Soon you took a bag of beef jerky and pointed to the small symbol on it. “What is this animal called again?”
“That's a cow.”
“Yes! I need the juice from it! The cow juice! What is its name? I forgot.” you perked up and beamed at him, hoping he understood. It all clicked for Sam, and he let out a hearty laugh at the realization.
“Do you mean milk, perchance?”
“Yes! I knew it had that sound! I need milk!” Sam chuckled again and waves his hand, sending a small shadow to retrieve some. “By the way would you be down to do some work tonight?”
“Tonight? Yeah, I can always use some extra cash.” The prefect was always so easy going. Guess they had to be in a place like this.
“Good. I'll apply your discount right now then!”
Heartslabyul
Your favorite Heartslabyul members have invited you to join them. Another Unbirthday party was to be hosted and the stars aligned today for the whole deck to help with the baking. It felt nice to be with them. They were like a family in a way, being with them felt like home. Alongside baking, there was some cooking being done too.
“Geez you really do like your eggs, huh?” Cater asked the spade who stirred his chopsticks with precision. He is determined to make the perfect tornado omelet.
“Oh you have no idea.” Ace tsked. “Whenever we go out to a restaurant it's the only thing he orders.”
“Not true!” Deuce's interjection wasn't as strong as it usually is, much to focused on his creation. “Yeah only if they dont offer any.” Ace retorts.
“Grim, it is unsanitary to touch the batter,” Riddle breaks up the impending argument to chide the direbeast ‘helping’ him stir, “Trey how many egg yolks do I add?”
“Three. You sure got it Riddle?” Riddle pouts a bit. He knows he got a shell in the batter last time but he's trying! “I'll get it right this time, you can count on it.”
“Ooh, give the egg whites to Deuce if you aren't using them!” Deuce mutters a thank you to Cater as he finishes up his omelet. “Does anyone else want one?”
No’s resound across the kitchen aside from you and Grim which makes Deuce smile. “Alright, what kind do you want Yuu? I'm still unsure on what kind you prefer.” Deuce looks a little embarrassed at not knowing despite how long you've been friends.
Before anyone could tease Deuce, Trey asks the worst question he possibly could without knowing. “Actually how do you like your eggs in the morning, Yuu? I rarely see you eat breakfast in the cafeteria.”
You pause for a moment, the pan you were greasing slipping slightly. Then you chuckled. “That's very bold of you Trey, I never expected you of all people to say that… But judging by everyone else's reaction, I assume it doesn't mean anything here?”
“Oh? Does it mean something different where you from?” Riddle asks, looking over at you. “It does actually.” Cater looks up from his phone he was reading the recipe from, noticing your amused expression. “What else could possibly it mean though?” You hold in a laugh. Perhaps this wasn't the best time to bring it up but you can't help it.
“Is that so? I sure hope I didn't say anything offensive. What does it mean?” Poor Trey; he chuckles as he decorates one of the finished cakes not knowing the storm that's brewing.
“You essentially just propositioned me in front of everyone.” The whole kitchen is silent as they stare at you. Trey looks flustered and confused out of his mind as an abundance of frosting squirts out of the bag. “I… pardon?”
Ace speaks first “Huh?! How does that make sense?”
“Proposition? What does that mean?”
“Don't worry about it Grim.” says the diamond. “Still that seems far fetched, it's rude of you to mess with Trey like that you know!”
“I'm not lying! It's actually what it means!” Trey is adjusting his glasses now, embarrassment growing. Riddle looks horrified, trying to find his words. He's trying to rack his brain for a response before deciding to ask about it. His voice comes out a little hesitant and unsure. “Are eggs part of some sort of courtship in your world…?”
“Um… sort of..?” At your words Deuce pales. Ace takes this opportunity to be a little shit per usual. “Wow! Seems like you have a chance then, Deucy!”
“Oh shut it Ace! Wait, have I been propositioning you this whole time?!” His face is red and he's hiding in his hands. He has offered so many egg dishes over the years. Oh God he must have made you so uncomfortable— this isn't what an honor student would do!
“I still don't know what that means…” Grim grumbles.
“No no! Offering eggs is fine, it's just that particular phrase has very different connotations in my world.”
Ace is snickering at the whole situation, but especially at Deuce’s panic. He's also just as confused, however. Trey finally has the courage to speak. “Um, how exactly does that mean…” He trails off, defeated. “I'm sorry Yuu, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable…”
“You didn't. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to tease you too much…”
“Okay, but how exactly does that mean that?”
“Yeah I'm with Cater on this one…” Ace adds.
“Enlighten me.” Riddle puts his hands on his hips, morbid curiosity getting the better of him.
“So… When someone asks that they essentially mean to say they're gonna invite you to spend the night with them and cook you breakfast in the morning.” Trey looks even more embarrassed but so does Riddle.
“So it's a sleepover? That's it?” Grim asks just to be waived off by Cater again who vibrating with laughter.
“That's a pretty convoluted way of asking…” Deuce looks to the side, also a little flustered. “Yeah it makes no sense for me either, and I'm from that world, but that is what it means…”
“Wow so Trey really is bold!” Cater snickers as Ace joins in with a “I never knew you had it in you.”
“Enough with this vulgar talk!” Riddle commands, clearly demanding the conversation to be over.
“I am never gonna live this down aren't I?”
Leona Kingscholar
I am gonna nerd a lil abt aztec mythology rn and I'm not apologizing
Herbivore is what he called you. It was meant to be an insult but you never took offense. There is no other creature that fights harder than prey that is fighting for their life or backed into a corner. If anything it was a compliment. You've seen how hard they can fight.
Yet today Leona took the title further. “You are honestly like a little rabbit. All this confidence and attitude, yet harmless.” You raised a brow at him. “Thank you.”
Leona's eyes shift ever so slightly. “You're taking it as a compliment?” You tilt your head. “I assume rabbit in this world is synonymous with fragility here…? Odd. They're a symbol of warriors back in my world.”
“Is that so?” Leona speaks boredly, but he doesn't excuse himself or tell you to shut up. “Yeah, rabbits are these mighty warriors that are completely invincible. Children of one of the 5 sin gods too. Nothing can kill them. Centzon Tōtōchtin are no joke. Odd how they're considered weak here.”
You think for a moment. “But they are known to be constantly drunk all the time and play around, so I guess that could be an insult…” Leona just rubs his head. “Take it however you want…”
Kalim al-Asim
“Look at all the stars!” Kalim exclaims, pointing up at the sky. He lands his carpet along the sand dunes, eyes full of wonder. He then looks to you with bated breath, waiting for your reaction.
“It's beautiful…” You whisper, overlooking the patterns of stars decorating the night sky. It was straight out of a painting, vast and whimsical. Kalim was glowing at your happiness. “Aaah, I'm glad you like it! I was hoping you would!”
You lean back against the ground. Shooting stars dart across the sky along the twinkling lights in a beautiful display. Your eyes land on the moon, admiring how different it was from your own.
“The moon looks beautiful tonight, doesn't it?” You freeze for a moment. “Haha, careful saying that to people from my world Kalim, not that you'll be running into anyone else from there anytime soon…”
Kalim looks over to you, brows slightly furrowed. “Eh? What do you mean?” You look back up the moon again. “Saying ‘the moon looks beautiful tonight’ where I’m from means I love you.” There's a moment of silence as Kalim ponders.
“Well then the moon looks beautiful tonight! I love all of my friends!” Kalim grins at you, fist pumped to his chest.
“It's not like that, Kalim. It's for romantic feelings. Funny, since coming here I've had a lot of experiences that would be considered flirtatious in my word…” You laugh a bit before a small frown appears on your features but Kalim snaps you out if it.
“So what you're saying is… it's a love confession?” His eyes are glimmering, the moon reflecting on them beautifully.
“You got it.”
“Then the moon looks beautiful tonight.”
Jamil Viper
So in TWST the languages aren't called the same thing in our world but I couldn't figure out the language of the Scalding Sands so I made one up. Can be a psuedo-prequel to my other fic Missing Yuu. It can be read here!
“Your Arabic is so similar yet so different than my world's version” Jamil pauses his mumbling and hums in question. “Arabic?”
“It's a language where I'm from. It sounds very similar to yours. Like I swear it could be some sort of dialect of it.”
“Scaldic, you mean?” You nod looking over at him from where you lay in his bed. “Is that what it's called? It's a pretty language.” Jamil messes with the stereo in his room, taking out an old CD and browsing for another he wanted to show you. “Maybe once you get more comfortable in this language, I can teach you a bit.”
“That would be lovely, thanks Jamil” As the sounds of shuffling continue from his search and you absentmindedly mess with your necklace before sitting up. “Wait! I know!”
Jamil perks and turns to you, watching as you start to take off your necklace. “Here put this on, you've shown me so much music from your world, let me show you some from mine!”
You offer the necklace over, shaking it a little for encouragement. Jamil takes it gently and examines the necklace. He lifts up his hair and slips it on, feeling a warmth on his chest from where the mirror lay.
You speak, and Jamil braces against the weird feeling of the necklace warping your glitched gibberish from your throat into his native language. “Can you hear me?” The words echoed in his head a bit. He took a moment to fully process them as they reverberated in his head.
He almost replies in his native tongue, but the amulet compels him to speak another language. Your language.“Yes, I can.” He replies, slurring a bit as he feels his words echo and warp. Strange… he knows what he's saying but he can't understand it.
“You have an accent, well that makes sense…” You chuckle a bit as he sits beside you, taking a moment to adjust to the sensation. “I never thought about how the enchantments on these worked. I assumed that it would be instant. Is this what it's like for you?”
“Crowley said it would probably be different for me cause I'm not from this world. See why I ask you to repeat things all the time? … thanks for not getting too annoyed with that by the way.”
You tap away on your phone for a moment. “Here we go, I got some songs in Arabic for you, look.” Jamil watches you press play and takes in the music. It was ethereal, so different yet so similar to his worlds. Uncanny yet compelling. Then the lyrics start and he furrows his brows.
“It really is like Scaldic.” he replies, closing his eyes. “Its like if I focus hard enough I can hear it in my own language, but I cant.”
“See what I mean?” Jamil nods. “I think I'm picking up some words though, but there's no guarantee the meaning is the same.”
“Yeah it's how I feel all the time here… its frustrating at times. Oddly enough there are some words that stay the same, mostly food for example. Like mahalabia or horchata for example.”
“Huh, odd how that works…” the music coursing through his body invigorates him. He can imagine all the potential ways to move to this.
“Yeah. And it's the same dish too— well sort of. It tastes so similar yet so different. I miss my world's food, but I'm slowly forgetting the taste of it. Its just vauge memory.” Jamil peers over to the saddened expression on your face. He never even considered that part of being from another world.
“... How about we listen to your music while cooking, then? I'm sure we can make something that tastes like home.” Your face brightens. “That sounds nice.”
Vil Schoenheit
“Thank you for putting up with my accent, it must be annoying to deal with.” You sip on the tea he offered you, trying your best to abide by the manners in this world. Vil merely looked at you.
“It's not annoying at all. Your accent is fine just the way it is.” He almost seemed disappointed by the insinuation.
“Ah… Sorry I just saw that Epel’s usually not allowed to use his accent around you, so I assumed I shouldn't either.” Vil sighs.
“That's different. You have already proven yourself strong and beautiful enough to be who you are. Epel on the other hand needs to learn to accept himself for who he is first before he can truly be the person he wants to be. He must prove to me he can love himself as he is. If I hated accents, I wouldn't have let Rook speak in his."
“Ah I see… Thank you.” It wasn't everyday that you get praise from the Vil Schoenheit. “Your speech has improved, though I may point out there are some words you may need to work on. Your accent may make it sound like you are talking about something else entirely. Hmm…”
You hold your breath as he thinks. “I want you to grow into the best spudling you can be, so how about you take voice lessons from me?” Vil seems to smirk at your surprised expression. “From you..?”
Vil nods. “Yes. This way you can grow more confident in your speech and vocabulary. That voice of yours is beautiful, it just needs to be tuned.” You look at your tea then to him. “I accept.”
#twisted wonderland x reader#dire crowley x reader#mozus trein x reader#twst sam x reader#divus crewel x reader#ashton vargas x reader#riddle rosehearts x reader#trey clover x reader#cater diamond x reader#ace trapolla x reader#deuce spade x reader#twst grim x reader#leona kingsholar x reader#kalim al asim x reader#jamil viper x reader#vil shoenheit x reader#disney twst#twisted wonderland
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