#honestly it would be better if I just puked and felt better instead of spending several hours being fucking miserable

[mikkaeus]

I love not eating properly all day and then eating the rest of my dinner at 3am and then spending an hour retching into the toilet :) not the consequences of my own actions :)))))

[teyums]

Twin Flames

pairing: Ao’nung x fem!metkayina na’vi reader

contains: angst with underlying bittersweet fluff, slight infidelity, no smut but a very brief, vague rehashing of events. Ao’nung and reader are both 19. wc: 3,124

“Honestly I’m better as your boy, I’d be kinda shitty as ya man, let’s go back to only being friends. I’m sorry girl I hope you understand it’s just, I don’t wanna fall in love.” - KYLE

You and Ao’nung were written in the stars. Twin flames. A love so fierce among two souls that it’d be impractical to think you could come out unscathed. Like night and day, never one without the other, but never meant to be together.

He never intended to hurt you, really, he didn’t. But somewhere in all the gold that glittered and the feeling of something fresh and exciting, he simply lost sight and forgot what he really wanted.

Love and Ao’nung were two words that never should have been in the same sentence. You wished you had listened to those around you, to those who noticed the two of you growing far too close for the relationship to remain platonic.

You wished you had listened to those who recognized the familiar gleam he’d get in his eyes when he wanted something he knew he wasn’t supposed to have; to those who warned that he would break you into a million pieces like he did with the others. But what you felt in your heart and saw with your own two eyes, you couldn’t deny. He was different with you, you swear he was.

A friend was what you called each other. Bestfriends. Growing up in Awa’atlu, you were stuck to his side like glue as a child, always begging to go hunting with him and his friends. You wanted to go everywhere he went, do everything he did. Disgruntled and annoyed at first, a little Ao’nung had eventually taken a liking to you, much to his own surprise. And from then on, your presence in each other’s lives was as normal as breathing.

And somewhere along the line, Ao’nung had become gentle with you, contrary to his usual irreverent personality. He stopped treating you like you were just another one of his knuckle-headed friends, but instead something more than that. He found himself staring at you longer than he used to; captivated by the details about your features or personality that he never cared to relish on in the past.

The way your face would light up every time you heard his voice call for you. How you’d beam when you sat with him on the beach and raved about your day. He’d simply watch you, humming in response every now and then to let you know he was listening, on his face a smile so love-sickeningly drenched in admiration while you gesticulated animatedly.

He would have puked had someone held a mirror up to him to see his own besotted expression, but he loved how excited you were to talk to him about the smallest of things. How even while he’s studied the distinct map your starred freckles project along your body over and over again, for some reason, he still finds himself getting lost in them.

He doesn’t want to fall in love.

It’s what he tells himself every time a mention of your name has his ears perking attentively, listening in on the conversation regarding his newfound fascination. Every time a waft of your scent in the salt-laced breeze sends his mind reeling with thoughts he can’t seem to mute. But it’s too late.

Hell, how couldn’t he have fallen for you? You’re always perched on the dock outside his mauri before eclipse, swinging your legs as you patiently await his return from training so the two of you can spend some time alone before dinner.

Genuinely happy to see him regardless of how grumpy he can be, because you like him for him. And you’re completely unaware of how his mind battles with his heart as he admires you from afar, wondering how he’d let himself tumble face first into an irreversible fondness for you.

He doesn’t want to fall in love, but one can’t stop the inevitable.

Snarky teasing turned into transient observations that scarily resembled compliments. Chummy roughhousing morphed to playful touches to the most ticklish parts of you, just so he could hear your pretty laugh cascade through his ears like his own songcord. He had half the mind to add a bead, just for you.

And for a while, he felt it too, honestly he did. But Ao’nung wasn’t familiar with love, had pushed the thought of it away for so long that now he had no idea how it was supposed to happen. The things you were and weren’t supposed to do. He never knew that the fluttering feeling of butterflies swarming in his stomach were good, that he shouldn’t run from them, but embrace them.

Sure he’d grown up watching his parents display their affection to one another; grown up hearing the stories of an adamant, smitten Tonowari pining after a hard-to-get Ronal, despite her apparent aloofness. How he fell first and she fell even harder. But he never actually thought he would end up head over heels for a girl. It was usually the other way around, girls pining over him while he let the attention boost his ego.

He was a no strings kind of guy— utterly terrified by the thought of being responsible for breaking a girl’s heart. Breaking your heart, like he knew he would because he fucks everything up and he wanted no parts of it.

But he’s conflicted. Deep down he does want what his parents have. Someone to call his own, someone to come home to. Someone who means more than a stupid hookup that would leave him regretting his decision afterwards and wondering why the hell he went through with it. But like always with the metkayina boy, pride trumps what his heart already knows.

He’s well aware that it’s too good to be true. The thought that he could ever experience what it truly means to be happy, by letting himself be loved by you, is all that it will ever be. A thought. An unattainable aspiration. He knows you’re too good for him. Compassionate, thoughtful, kind. Everything he’ll never be, coupled with a heart much too pure to be polluted by his indecision.

But maybe, just maybe he could enjoy the reverie while it lingered, and pretend like he could really have you all to himself. Just for one night. Selfishly disregarding his issues with commitment, all he could think about while he laid in bed was how badly he wanted to see you, how badly he wanted to be with you.

Leading you on was the last thing on his mind that late night he’d snuck out from his Mauri and to yours, determinedly pitching small shells he’d collected on the way there between the flowing tulle curtains of your open window to get your attention.

And for some reason you couldn’t sleep, as if that was fate’s way of setting the two of you up for failure from the beginning. You’d already spent an hour staring up at the intricate weaving of your Mauri’s roof, wishing your eyelids would hurry up and become weighted, when the small disruption of something clattering against the floorboards had you sitting up almost instantly.

You smiled keenly, already having an idea of who it was. He told you he’d come for you later, sometime after eclipse, and he always kept his promises. At least, you thought he did.

The both of you waded by the shore beneath the light of the moon, legs brushing against the other from the effort of treading once you swam further out. Childishly splashing the other with small waves of cool, salty water and trying your best to keep your laughter quiet; the village long asleep but your hearts awake.

It was when he bundled you closer, when strong arms lagged through the calm waters to wind around your waist and pull you into him. That, was when you knew nothing would be the same.

You should have pulled away, should have called it a night before things could progress, like the voice in the back of your head was telling you to do. But just like always, those ocean eyes held you in a trance, a smug grin on his face in response to how deeply you blushed and it only made matters worse.

You wonder now if he knew what he was doing when he brought a hand up to caress your dampened cheek, his gaze undeniably tender when he told you he’d always thought you were the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen.

You see now that you were stupid to fall for it. But in that fleeting moment, with your arms around his neck and your hearts beating as one, his lips moving against yours felt so right. It felt like that was where you were always meant to be, in his arms, pressed against the warmth of his skin as he set your soul ablaze.

You’d spent the rest of the night on the sand, the comfort of your bed long forgotten. He was all you needed. Entangled underneath the moonlight as you let him see so much farther into you than you had with anyone. He kissed broken promises upon your skin, lust-drunken words slurred from his mouth swaddled in the crook of your neck and you can’t believe you trusted him.

Your ability to see the good in everyone ultimately played the role in your downfall. You took pride in being someone who went off actions, and not words. Because it had never failed you before, but since then you’ve learned to never say never.

Curse your aching heart. You really should have listened when everyone told you to run, that behind all the kind gestures and longing glances and saccharine kisses to the forehead— it was all a game to him.

Things weren’t official with the two of you but you had planned to change that. Flung so deep into the intensity of your own feelings, everything about the way he treated you let you know that he must have felt the same.

Surely it’d be impossible to do all that the two of you had done with someone and not catch feelings. It’d be unimaginable to let someone peer so extensively into what makes you you, and somehow not fall in love with them.

“Meet me by the mangroves at noon, our spot.” You’d murmured between a parting kiss, just the day before, and he can’t believe he forgot.

He was enjoying his time with you too much to notice that he let things go on for too long, too busy reveling in the feeling of what it felt like to truly be loved. To be cared for.

He never intended for it to go this far, constantly having to remind himself to break the news to you that he wanted to remain friends, so he wouldn’t lose you all together. To let you go before he could do something to hurt you.

Ao’nung knew he was in too deep the moment he realized you were the last image playing behind his eyelids when he fell asleep, and the first thing he thought about when he woke up.

The idea of him loving someone so profoundly shocked him to his core, scared him into submitting back into his old habits. He needed to be with someone who couldn’t see him, someone who if he were to mess things up, the sight of them in fragments due to his actions wouldn’t cause him to endure that same agony. So subconsciously, he did what he always does when he has a good thing going for him. Fuck it up.

The sound of his laughter in the distance carried your feet along the buoyant netting that served as walkway between the homes of your village. A hopeful grin plastered on your face and a freshly woven armband clutched between your hands. A gift from him to you, and though not very traditional for you to give the first courting gift, nothing about your situation was, so you found it more than fitting.

The sight in front of you halted your movements, leaving your mind to try and make sense of the scene before your eyes could confirm what you feared to be true. What everyone had tried to warn you of.

The man who succeeded in making you feel a way no other had, stood a little ways in front of you, with a girl. Her back leaned against the rocks while she batted her lashes and gazed at him as if he’d hung the stars in the sky himself. The same way you’d found yourself doing every time he so much as looked in your direction.

A mere conversation between the two of them would never have been enough to upset you, you liked to think you were more secure than that. But you’d be lying to yourself if you claimed you didn’t see the way his hand cradled her cheek, and how his eyes flitted over her features, as if she were the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen.

Your insecurities didn’t have much work to do, as it was the words that left his own mouth that confirmed your fears. The same thing he had confessed to you— all those nights ago when you laid intwined under the stars— he swore to her. With that same glint in his eye, that same longing look that you were foolish to ever believe would be reserved for you.

A fire surged up the column of your throat and a dreadful weight settled in the pit of your stomach that almost had your knees buckling. Your lips parted to speak, to ask him what the hell he was doing with her when he was supposed to have met you here.

But the words never came, they remained lodged between the confines of your heart-wrenched vocal cords. Your fist tightened around what would’ve been a lovely moment between the two of you, and the sound of it thumping against the ground, paired with the cloud of sand it brought up in its wake was enough to peel his attention from your giggling contender.

His startled, turned guilt-ridden expression would’ve rendered comical to you, but the rush of hot tears that bubbled over your waterline and stained your seafoam cheeks were far too impatient to wait for you to get a laugh in.

You staggered back with a denying shake of your head, a string of curses inaudible as you threw your hands up once he made a move to get to you. The girl he had been so enamored with just moments ago conveniently forgotten the second he witnessed your heart fall through your chest.

He called out for you in a panic, hurriedly sifted his hands through pale golden and swiftly scooped the disheveled accessory from the sand before his feet took off.

Ao’nung chased you through the village until he was nearly winded. Ignoring your hisses for him to leave you alone and brushing off the harsh shoves you sent to his chest as if they weren’t actually starting to hurt.

“Please, wait!” Another plea for you that went ignored, your ears only filled with the painful ringing of betrayal.

Blinded by the moisture in your eyes, you realized he’d cornered you. Chased you all the way to a secluded clearing behind the palm trees so you would stop running and just talk to him.

A strong hand gripped your forearm, turning you around rougher than intended to meet the frantic look in his eyes. “Please,” He implored breathlessly and his chest heaved from his efforts just moments earlier. “I never meant for it to go like this.”

You twirled from his grasp and swatted his hand away in the process, your face screwed up with hurt and he watched every conflicted emotion pass through your eyes at once. You didn’t even know how you were still standing.

“I gave myself to you!” Your voice wavered as you thrusted an accusatory finger to his chest. His lips moved, but no words left them as he clutched the forgotten gift in his hands. “I can’t believe I was so stupid.” You whisked your head away, shielding your face as another round of tears threatened to make themselves known, as if you weren’t embarrassed enough.

“I’m- I’m sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking. I-“ His head dipped to the side to match his drooping shoulders, and you felt the rough pad of his thumb graze your cheekbone in an attempt to fix what was already broken. “Tahni, please, I was going to tell you. I swear-“

“You did this on purpose, didn’t you? Was this all some kind of sick game to you?” You choked out and backed away from his touch with your arms crossed over your chest, suddenly feeling exposed in front of the man who had already seen you so much barer than you stood now.

But with your feelings worn on your sleeves and so obviously unreciprocated, you felt more naked than you’d ever been regardless of the coverings you were wearing. Completely vulnerable in front of him, so naively gullible to think he’d ever put aside his immature desires and feel the same way you did.

“What- No! I’d- I’d never-“ He sputtered an answer vehemently, his expression almost wounded as he immediately denied your claim. “I just, I can’t give you what you need. You deserve better than me.” His hands found yours despite your efforts to avoid them, and he quickly realized why you didn’t want to be touched.

A stark contrast from your pained stature, the affliction he had caused, your body relaxed the second he touched you and your composure crumbled before him.

Sobs racked through your body and you weakly tugged your hands from his grasp to no avail, your words shaky as you begged for him to let you go. And without another thought he pulled you into his embrace, firmly caging you between the arms that once comforted you.

But they failed to replicate that same feeling, the image of what once was completely tarnished by his own actions. The words that left your lips were enough to make his eyes well with a wetness foreign to him. A deep-seated feeling he’d never forget. Remorse.

“You’re cruel, Ao’nung.”

The sound of your heart shattering drowned out his incessant, anguished apologies and your body slumped in his arms. You let him hold you, allowed your forehead to fall into the dip of his chest as large hands caressed into the curve between your trembly shoulders.

You mindlessly permitted his attempts to console you as you knew you would never let him close to you again. The two of you stood like that for a few minutes, until your weeping reduced to jagged inhales while you struggled to catch your breath.

“Did it mean anything to you at all? Any of it?” You squeaked hopelessly, and the sound of your broken voice sent daggers to the heart you were almost certain he didn’t have.

With his chin rested atop your head, his eyes squeezed shut and he exhaled unsteadily before he spoke.

“More than you know.”

part two

Reblogs + Likes + Comments are much appreciated 💗

[deleteddewewted]

Hey comadre! I saw you asked for a fluff request, and I came to deliver 💜 I think you might be intrigued by the idea!

Shinsou who has been bullied his whole life, with the bullying growing harsher his middle school years. When he begins his high school life in UA, he remains distant, not allowing himself for others to get close to him, and for them to hurt him, because he has developed that trauma. He then successfully transfers over to the Hero Course, and his seat partner is the chubby/curvy girl of the class. She is friendly and welcoming towards him, but he remains to give her the cold shoulder, although he saw her intentions genuine, but he still keeps his guard up. She then goes and sits with him during lunch, her explaining that she understands why he gives off the cold shoulder to his peers. She explains she has underwent being bullied herself, by her weight and such. She tells him that as time passed, she learned to love and accept herself for who she is, and offers to help Shinsou in a similar manner. To help him learn to trust people and she asks if he puked accept her as a friend. He accepts and their friendship grows, with him starting to develop feelings for her, and wants to spend more time with the person who saved him from his own troubles 💗

My heart and soul needed this, thank you comadre!💜

(I may or may not have used some of my personal experience being body shamed in here so....yeah, thats your heads up.)

Misery and Company

Emo/Himbo Shinsou x F! Reader (Reverse Comfort)

TW: Mentions of bullying, Mentions of Body Shaming, Leading on

He remembered the constant laughter that was present in his life. Everyone would assumed it was a great childhood but to him, to someone like him, it was never the paradise that it was thought to be. The laughter was at him not with him. Kids pointed their fingers towards him and blamed him for all of the problems that would happen throughout the school day.

“I didn’t do it!” As a child, he didn’t know any better. He assumed that he could scream and yell like every other kid and be listened to. He found out quickly that he didn’t get that right. The teacher quickly told him off and called his parents. They came to pick him up from school and started to ask all kinds of questions. Did your quirk go off? Why did you do it? Is it that hard to listen? He didn’t bother to try to make connections after that. Friends were a waste of time. A liability. An opportunity to suffer unnecessarily.

When Shinsou reached middle school he suffered from the increase of villain comments. His quirk became the center of attention, it didn’t matter if he had good grades or was nice to people. His quirk was the focus, always was.

“You can get away with everything you want!” He’s heard that one about a million times already. It always managed to irritate him how much people cared about what he did with it. He hated the eyes. The voices. It only made his internal monologue become aggressive with himself. The constant reminder that he was less than the others for being born with a quirk that used people. It made him want to scream his head off.

“Yeah, I’m aware. Um, can we stop talking about it now?” He wasn’t a pushover but he knew that he could just say what he wanted. He purposefully asked a question to get the other student to stop talking without using his quirk. The last tithing he wanted was for someone to accuse him of using his quirk on them.

That night, Shinsou worked on his homework at his desk. His parents were away on a work trip so he had the entire house to himself. He looked at the time and groaned when he realized it was already one in the morning. He walked into his bathrooms and looked for his toothbrush. When he looked up at the mirror, ready to brush his teeth, he couldn’t help and stare at himself. His eyes held bags under them, dark and heavy as if he hadn’t slept in days. The faint smudging of the eyeliner he put on only making his eyes look even worse. He was tired and alone. His parents weren’t there to comfort him and with his quirk making it difficult to connect with others, he had no one to speak with other than himself. He dropped his hand down and just stared at his reflection. The image became hazy as he continued to stare back at it.

His face felt warm. He couldn’t stop the river that flowed down his face. He didn’t ask for his quirk, he also didn’t ask to be born. Shinsou couldn’t stop the rattling within his chest nor the stuttered gasps as he tried to breathe. He looked up at his reflection again, this time noticing the red and swollen eyes that belong to him. That night, Shinsou laid down to sleep on top of the covers and stared blindly at the uncovered window. He vowed to never become attached again. Not to classmates, not to family, and definitely not any possible friends.

Going to UA was a dream come true for him, the ability to be closer to your heroic dreams was closer than ever, but not for him. Shinsou had to watch as the heor course students acted like entitled brats, everyone in the school bowing to them like they were some great thing. He hated watching them boast, hated everything about them, to be honest. He wanted nothing to do with them, so why did they want something to do with him?

“Uh, sorry but I was wondering if you’d like to sign this petition?” Shinsou looked up from the book he was reading and stared straight towards the holder of the voice. It was a short chubby girl with a clipboard in her hands. She looked at him expectantly, waiting for his answer to her question.

“No thanks.”

“It’s for a local shelter, it’ll help abused and abandoned pets find a good home-” Shinsou wanted to be left alone. He sighed out loud and closed his book while rubbing his eyes, the eyeliner smudging.

“I said no. Now leave me alone.” Shinsou watched as the girl flinched at his annoyed voice.

“S-sorry, I’ll just leave you alone.” She quickly walked away from him, nearly entering a jog as she left him behind. Shinsou couldn’t help but become disappointed with himself. The girl was being nice to him and he snapped at her. She wasn’t even benign annoying, he just felt tired. He could hear how some people around him mumbled about the exchange he packed his things up and left towards his class.

He did see the girl again from time to time. He found out she was in the hero course and that she was in the A class as well. He would spot her on occasion but he did interact with her during his hero course admissions test. She wore her hero costume with pride and honestly, he had to look away for a moment, she looked like power itself. He couldn’t help feel intimidated in her presence. She didn’t come up to him yet so he had to come up to her. He intended on apologizing for his behavior a few months back, he didn’t mean to snap at her and he never found the opportunity to do so.

You watched as the indigo-haired boy awkwardly made his way towards your group. He wouldn’t meet anyone’s eyes but instead focused on the floor below him.

“Hi, I’m Shinsou Hitoshi.” He extended his hand out to you but you just stared at him like he grew a second head. He felt awkward again, he was expecting you to at least call him a dick but the silence made his stomach become tight.

“Nice to meet you Shinsou, I’m L/n Y/n.” You felt bad for being quiet for too long, you couldn’t help it. He was really pretty to look at especially since he wore eyeliner that sharpened the appearance of his eyes.

“Oh, uh yeah. I um, wanted to apologize for my attitude a while back. It was rude of me and uhh, I know that saying I was in a mood isn’t a good excuse but-”

“It’s fine, I get it. I can be annoying so it’s ok.” You gave him a bright smile and a clap on the back of his shoulder.

He tensed when he felt the heat of your hand on him, he couldn’t help but lean slightly into it. His ears reddened and not wanting to embarrass himself more than he did already, he quickly pulled his mask up to cover his ears and face.

“No- yeah- I mean no, you- you weren’t annoying, I was just in a mood and it accidentally let it out on you. Sorry about that.” He rubbed the back of his neck and looked at you briefly. You just smiled at him again and got closer to his person.

“Hey, do you mind if i-” You grabbed the bottom part of his mask and pulled it down slightly, your face closer than ever before to his own. He stopped breathing as you got closer, he couldn’t help but feel self-conscious about his breath. He smelled like coffee and for some reason, it made him feel embarrassed if you were to found out about his dependency of it.

You reached out with your pinky and brushed some of the black flakes of his eyeliner away from his upper cheek. You blended the smudged eyeliner on the bottom of his eye out and pulled his mask up again to cover his face.

“There! Just wanted to clean up your makeup. It’s really well done, by the way, wish I could do my own eyeliner as clean as your own. Do you wear eyeshadow on the bottom lid or is it just eyeliner with you?” You weren’t mocking him for his dressing and styling choices, many of his old classmates did.

He told you about what products he uses and yes, he did use eyeshadow for his bottom lid. You just smiled at him and occasionally added what you used. He enjoyed talking to you, you were nice to him and allowed him to speak his mind. He couldn’t help but want to know more about you. Unfortunately, your conversation had to come to an end since his group was the first one up, but you both agreed to talk after all matches were over.

His second year at UA was better but he still felt awkward around everyone. Everyone, discluding Bakugou, was nice to him. You especially made it your duty to be around him all the time. He enjoyed your company but he found himself still pushing away from him at times. The constant lingering feeling of possible betrayal being prominent in all of your interactions. It didn’t matter how many times you helped him do his makeup or how many times he did your own, didn’t matter if he showed you his favorite video games to play, nor if he introduced you to his parents and had you in his room playing those same games with him for hours. He was still nervous, paranoid that you’ll stab him in the back. Scared that you’ll turn around and show your true colors. That you’ll take everything you know about him and tell everyone so you could all mock him again.

Shinsou, due to his fears, started to pull away from you. No more hanging out with him, no more doing each other’s makeup, no more eating lunch together. Shinsou ignored you every time you tried to speak with him, always turning himself away from you or being rude in some manner. It did discourage you at times, made you feel like you were back in middle school with the cute guys in your grade only speaking with you to make fun of your interests afterward. You thought that maybe he was going to be different but you guessed not. You kept away from him as you processed the situation but that also gave you the chance to watch him. You noticed that instead of sitting with your guy’s other classmates he would op to sit on his own within the cafeteria at a faraway table or somewhere else. You noticed that he not only avoided you but the rest of your classmates. He was back to how he was in his first year.

You couldn’t keep watching him be alone again, you didn’t want to leave him alone. You made up your mind and made your way towards Shinsou. He was sitting outside of the cafeteria eating his lunch while reading a book that was placed on his lap. He looked tense as he continued to read and nervous at any sound that made itself known. You felt bad for him, from what he told you about his own school experience, more of the lack of, you assumed that he was bullied for his quirk. He never used it on you and he never spoke much about it. He never gave you any details and never told you how his quirk activities, he just avoided the conversation entirely but he was always excited to listen to your own though.

“Shinsou.” You watched as the male jumped in his spot on the floor and direct himself towards you.

“Shinsou, can we talk for a bit?” He averted his eyes and began to pick his things from the floor, shaking his head as he did.

“N-no, sorry. I have to go-” You got in his way and crouched down to meet him at eye level.

“I know you have nowhere to be at. Please, talk to me for a bit.” You placed your hand on his own and stared at him. Shinsou didn’t want to meet your eyes. He didn’t want to see the disgust in them or the hatred you felt for him.

What he didn’t expect was for you to place your hand on his cheek and gently guide his gaze to your own. His eyes were wide and watery, he didn’t understand why you were being so gentle, so kind with him. Didn’t you want to be angry with him? Your own eyes were soft, a small smile present on your face.

“Shinsou, what’s wrong?” Your voice was gentle and your touch never leaving him. He took in a breath and spilled everything and all of his troubles to you. Once he finished, he was welcomed by a hug.

You pulled him into your own body and shared your warmth with him. You gently brushed his wild hair as you allowed him to cry to his heart’s content. He needed someone to listen to him, someone who would just let him talk. You were that person for him. Once he felt better, he pulled away from your person and rubbed his eyes. His eyeliner was running and smudging severely on his face. He pouted slightly at his destroyed makeup but then looked at your uniform. You had black smears all over your jacket and shirt.

“I-i’m sorry L/n. I didn’t mean to ruin your uniform.” You just chuckled and shook your head at him.

“It’s fine Shinsou, you needed to let it all out.” He began to take deeper breaths and eventually sat next to you. His head gently laying on top of your own.

“It… it was frustrating you know? I thought that I was the problem and I still feel like I am at times.”

“I get what you mean, I also had to deal with bullies.” Shinsou lifted his head and looked at you confused. You had to deal with bullies? Why? You were nice to everyone, why would anyone want to hurt you?

“I think it’s obvious as to why Shinsou.” Shit, did he say that out loud?

“Yes, you did.” You gave him another smile and took his hand. You compared him to your own. Your hand was smaller than his own but it was rounder, chubbier, just like the rest of you. You found it adorable how different the both of you were.

“I’m overweight, man. People tend to hold a preconceived idea of what overweight people are like.” Shinsou still couldn’t understand.

“So?  Why would anyone bully you for something you don’t have all that much control over?”

“Because they’re mean. It’s a power trip for them.” You began to play with his fingers, taking note of the muscles that you weren’t aware existed within them.

“I used to have a crush on this guy and for the longest time, my classmates made fun of me because of it. They always said that I was too fat for him or that id hurt him if I leaned onto him. Typical mean comments about my appearance and how I was unloved.” Shinsou began to frown and got closer to you. His body heat becoming a welcoming presence to you as you recounted your own struggles.

“Then one day he asked me to hang out with him. We ate lunch together and we spent time together. I thought he was interested in me just like I was interested in him. He once got close to my face and made it look like he was about to kiss me before reaching for something behind me. We laughed it off as an accident but I noticed the small blush on his face. I was excited.” You pressed on each of his fingernails and wiggled his fingers in between your pointer and thumb.

“I thought that this was it, he liked me back. Our school dance came and everyone was asking out their dates for it. I thought he was going to ask me to go with him but that didn’t happen. He pulled me towards him in the middle of class with everyone watching us, a lot of the other girls were jealous of me because of it.” You noticed the chipped nails polished on his nails and began to scratch it off.

“He cupped my face and pulled me closer to him. We were going to kiss.” You stopped playing with Shinsous hand. Your hand falling onto the ground limply.

“He gripped my face and pushed me away saying “Did you really think id like you? You’re such a joke L/n.” ” You pulled away from Shinsou, your hand rested on your lap instead of anywhere near his.

“I felt so alone, so gross, so….fat. It hurt but it was made worse because it was in front of everyone. Everyone saw how he treated me and made fun of me. No one did anything, not even as I ran away crying. Instead, I got comments about my weight. I got called some really mean names that day and the following. I didn’t go to my school’s dance, I didn’t want to be made fun of again.” You didn’t hear a thing from Shinsou. He just sat there looking at you like you were crazy.

“Their assholes.”

“I know.” You looked at him and smiled. He came closer to you, grabbing your hand from your lap and interlacing them in one another.

“But I don’t feel like that anymore. I don’t care is a better way to phrase it. People can have their opinions, either nice or mean. I can’t dictate that.” Shinsou scooted closer to you as you continued talking.

“But I can dictate the way I think about myself and the people I want to be around me.” Shinsou couldn’t help himself anymore.

He leaned in towards you and placed his hand on your cheek. His lips gently pressing onto your own and unmoving. You felt your heart fluttered but it quickly turned to amusement. He just pressed his lips to yours and wasn’t moving, He wasn’t moving. He had his eyes closed and pressed into you, it was beginning to bruise your lips. You pulled back slightly and looked at his face. He had his lips still puckered and his eyes closed. You giggled and quickly kissed him again before he pulled away. You on the other hand did move and deepened the kiss.

Shinsous heart soured as you kissed him back, his lips no longer hurting but feeling gently caressed by your own. He couldn’t help the small gasps that escape him nor the way he pulled you closer to him. When the two of you parted, Shinsou looked at you with sleepy eyes. He wanted this and he wanted more.

“I like you L/n.”

“I like you too Shinsou.”

[the-bau-quinjet]

Nervous

Hello! This is honestly just a bunch of fluff (a tiny bit of angst bc Spencer worries about everything) and the reader being very nervous! I am currently writing a sequel to take place directly after this one! Read part two here!

Summary: Reader is arrested by the BAU! Little do they know, she is dating the one agent who is currently on medical leave...

warnings: none!

Word Count: 4954

“Are you sure you can pick her up today?” You are currently running around your apartment, phone held to your ear with your shoulder. You have to be at work in fifteen minutes, but first you have to drop your daughter off at school, and you’re running very late.

 “Babe, yes. I’m almost completely healed and I don’t go back to work until tomorrow. I’ll pick her up after school and then meet you at your apartment when you’re done working. Okay?” Thank God for Spencer Reid. He has been on medical leave for 5 days, slowly going insane. But, it meant more time for you and Lily to spend with him, so you’re not complaining.

“That’s perfect, thank you so much! I gotta go, I love you!” You are in such a daze, you don’t stop to think about the three words that just came out of your mouth. You hang up before Spencer can respond as you wrestle with your six year old to put shoes on. Grabbing both of your coats, you run out the door.

 You met Spencer Reid 9 months ago when he came into the hospital you work in with a concussion and some pretty bad bruises. It was really a chance meeting. Normally, you don’t even deal with patients because you work in research. But, your best friend asked you to run some lab results to a patient’s room and you couldn’t say no. Dr. Spencer Reid happened to be that patient.

 He wasn’t supposed to be in the room, but apparently something happened with the CT schedule, and he was done earlier than expected. So, instead of simply dropping off forms in an empty room, you hit a man with a door. Why he was standing behind the door is still a mystery to you, but you felt awful. This man is in the hospital and to make matters worse, you come along and hit him! With a door! You offered to get him some coffee as an apology, and in his concussed state he said “Only if we can go together.” You’ve since realized that was smoother than he normally acts, but you don’t care. He is the most lovable man you’ve ever met. 

 You met up for coffee three days later, and have been dating ever since. He met your daughter, Lily, on the second date. They clicked instantly. You knew then and there that you would love this man forever. You have not, however, actually said I love you before this morning. But, you’re still in too much of a rush to stop and think about it… or even realize it happened.  

 You pull into the parking garage at the hospital 7 minutes late. Honestly, better than you expected. The morning flies by as you work on research grants and hospital studies. All in all, a pretty average day. That is, until you walk back into the building from your lunch break.

 You don’t get a lot of visitors in the research wing, so it’s strange to see two pretty official looking individuals at the front desk. It’s even stranger to hear your name come out of one of their mouths.

 “Hi there. We are Agents Morgan and Rossi from the FBI. We’re looking Ms. Y/N L/N. Is she here?” That must have been Morgan talking.

 Spencer has told you a lot about his team. You feel like you know them all already with how many stories he’s told you. You’ve been hesitant to meet them though because of Lily. You don’t want her to get too attached to him and his friends if things were to go sideways. You haven’t really dated anyone since her father, so you’re a bit nervous. Spencer, of course, completely understands. He just wants you to be happy. It’s hard not to love him even more at the thought.

 You are immediately thrown into a panic at the sight of the two agents. Your thoughts are running wild with possibilities. They must be here because something happened to Spencer. Wait. That doesn’t make sense. He’s not even working today.

 Your panicked train of thought pulls to a stop when the two agents walk up to you. “Ms. L/N? Can we speak with you for a moment?” You nod, leading them toward your office.

 “Of course. My office is just down the hall.” You can’t help but feel nervous at the prospect of meeting Spencer’s coworkers without him. Especially if it has to do with a case they’re working. These are the people he loves most in the world. They are his family. What if they don’t like you? What if they think you’re an idiot? What if they think Spencer can do better? It also doesn’t help that you know they can tell you’re nervous because you know they are profilers. You sit down behind your desk, offering them the seats on the opposite side.

 “Ms. L/N, you’re in charge of the research department, correct?” Rossi says it like a question, but he clearly knows the answer.

 “That’s right.” You are trying everything you can to get your nerves to settle, but it just isn’t working. You’re basically lying to two human lie detectors, even if it is just by omission.

 “So if items were to go missing from this laboratory, you would be responsible for reporting it.” It was Morgan who spoke this time. It’s hard for you to follow their line of questioning. What would go missing? It’s not like you wouldn’t notice if a fume hood suddenly disappeared.

 “I suppose so, although it depends on what items. We don’t have a specific inventory of commonly used products like syringes and gauze, we just order more when we get low.” You can’t decide which agent to focus on. Your eyes are flicking nervously between both of them.

 “What about human tissue?” When the words come out of Morgan’s mouth, you freeze for just a second. You don’t have any human tissue in the lab, so how would it go missing? Of course, the profilers take the delay in your response to mean something other than confusion.

 “We- we don’t use human tissue in this specific laboratory. We focus on small animal models. The other research lab is responsible for human tissue protocols.” You stutter through your words under the harsh glares of the two agents. It is really not helping your nerves.

 “Then how do you explain this?” Rossi slides a paper across your desk. It’s housed in a large plastic bag with “EVIDENCE” across the top in big, block letters. It’s a form you have never seen before. The kind someone would fill out to transfer human tissue between labs. Your hands shake as you hold the paper, slowly trying to figure out what it is. You almost puke when you reach the bottom. It has your signature as an approval of the request. You drop the paper as if it has burned you.

 “I’ve never- I didn’t- how did-” You’re cut off before you can try to finish your sentence, but you don’t hear what they are saying. You feel the cold click of metal around your wrists, tight enough to just pinch your skin. They lead you back out of the building, to a waiting SUV. You can’t help but be grateful that nobody was there to witness your arrest.

 The ride to Quantico is silent. You keep trying to figure out how someone could have signed your name on that form, but you can’t focus. Your mind keeps drifting to memories with Spencer.

 You remember your first date in the coffee shop a block away from the hospital. He ordered a black coffee only to pour in an exorbitant amount of sugar. He blushed slightly, as if he was embarrassed by his drink preferences, only for his features to transform into a soft smile as you did exactly the same thing. The two of you talked for hours, only ending the date when you had to go pick up Lily.

 You remember running into him in the park with Lily, what you would come to refer to as your second date. He looked ethereal sitting at a table playing chess. Lily ran up to him, or rather the chess board he was sitting in front of, before you could stop her. She wanted to know what the horsey was for. You watched as he patiently explained to the five year old that it was a knight responsible for defending the king. 

He told her how it moves on the board. He told her how it was special because it is the only piece that can jump over other pieces. He must have spent 15 minutes talking to her about this one piece. And she was enthralled. When he was done, he looked around to find the child’s parents only to meet your eye. You’ll never forget the way his smile grew when he realized Lily was yours. The three of you spent the rest of the day in the park, playing chess, walking around the pond, and getting to know each other.

 You remember the look in his eyes right after he kissed you the first time. You remember how worried you were the first time he was injured on a case. You remember Lily asking you if he could be her daddy, and crying yourself to sleep that night because you wanted that too, more than anything, and you were so scared it wasn’t going to happen.

 Then you finally remember he’s picking Lily up from school today. Suddenly, the car ride isn’t so quiet anymore.

 “I need to call someone.” The words come out frantic and rushed. You are absolutely sure the expression on your face screams crazy, but this is about your kid, so you really don’t care. You need to call Spencer. Then he’ll come fix this. Explain how you couldn’t possibly be involved. The agent’s response is shorter than you expected.

 “Why?” Rossi sounds skeptical when he asks it. You would later suppose that he had a reason to be skeptical of you. Right now though? You didn’t do anything wrong so the whole innocent until proven guilty thing feels a little fake to you at the moment.

 “My boyfriend is picking up my daughter from school. I need to call him.” You don’t really know how to tell them said boyfriend is one Dr. Spencer Reid. You weren’t supposed to meet his friends yet and definitely not without him. You aren’t really in the right headspace to be deciding if right now is the best moment to out your relationship.

 “If he’s already planning on picking her up, you shouldn’t need to call him.” It feels to you at this moment that they don’t even believe you have a child. Of course, they must know because they have the one and only Penelope Garcia to find out every little thing about you. Before you can say anything else, they are dragging you out of the SUV and into the building. You are pushed through security into an elevator that takes you to the fifth floor. The BAU. You thought the first time you visited Spencer’s work would be a happier occasion. And that he would be here. The whole situation would actually be kind of funny if you weren’t so worried and nervous.

 The first thing you say when you are lead through the very intimidating glass doors is “JJ.” You would come to understand why that might earns some stares. The whole room is looking at you as if you have grown another head.

 “How do you know my name?” That’s a loaded question. Spencer has showed you pictures of his godson, Henry. JJ happened to be in some of those pictures as he is in fact, her son. Of course, you can’t really articulate that because you are too stressed and nervous to form full sentences. It takes a lot out of a person to be arrested, dragged from their place of work, shoved in a car, driven two hours through DC traffic, and then pulled into the FBI building as a suspect.

 Instead of properly calming yourself down until you can form a complete sentence, your eyes go wide and you say “Henry” as if that is enough of an explanation. If looks could kill, you would be dead.

 “How do you know my son’s name?” JJ’s words are so harsh, you physically flinch.

 “I.. it’s just that… You… Well… I-” You are a loss for words, yet again. You didn’t expect for Spencer’s best friend to ever look at you with such disgust. It’s honestly a little overwhelming to think the people he calls family all currently hate you. Even if they don’t really know who you are.

 “Maybe a few hours in here will jog your memory.” And with that you’re left alone to sit in a cold metal chair and stare at your reflection.

 --

 Throughout your relationship, Spencer has tried not to worry. You frequently come home from work a bit later than you originally planned, especially if you feel like you got a late start. So, when you don’t enter your apartment right at 5:30, he doesn’t think anything of it. When 6:00 rolls around, he texts you. At 6:30 he calls. By the time it reaches 7:00 and he still hasn’t heard from you, he’s actively pacing your small living room. When his most recent call goes to voicemail, he breaks. He packs up Lily’s stuff and the two of them are on the way to Quantico, finding you being the only thing on his mind.

 He replays his favorite moments with you in his mind as he drives from your DC apartment to Quantico. Normally, he’d take the metro, but if you really are missing it’s safer for Lily in the car.

He remembers the look on your face when you realized you hit him with a door. He couldn’t imagine a more beautiful person. You looked so guilty, he felt the need to hug you to tell you it was okay. It was a foreign feeling for him. He’s never been one to physically comfort people. Maybe it was the concussion. It was definitely the concussion that gave him the courage to ask you to coffee.

 He remembers the fluttering of butterflies in his stomach when he watched you pour almost as much sugar as him into your coffee. The soft smile on your face as the two of you spent hours talking about anything he could think of to keep the conversation from ending.

 He remembers the utter joy he felt upon realizing the five year old who inquired about the horsey on the chess board is your daughter. He remembers how he felt when he looked up, expecting to find an annoyed parent given that he just lectured a five year old on one chess piece for 15 minutes, but was instead met with your kind smile and loving eyes. He loves Lily just as much, if not more than he loves you.

 He remembers how you hung up the phone this morning before he could say “I love you too.” And now the thoughts he’s tried so hard to block out are circling in his mind. The words repeating in his head, over and over. What if I never see her again? What if I can’t tell her I love her?

 He pulls into the garage, carrying Lily so he can run faster into the building. He puts her down when they finally reach the elevator. She’s been surprisingly calm despite Spencer’s nervous attitude.

 “Spencie, where is Momma?” Spencer’s heart constricts at the sound of her sweet voice. He doesn’t know where you are, and it terrifies him.

 “We are going to find out! How would you like to see my desk? You can play with the cube I showed you at home!” He pulls a Rubik’s cube out of his satchel, placing it in Lily’s small hands. He guides Lily to his desk, telling her to stay there while he looks for his friends. She looks so tiny in his desk chair, he would stop to take a picture if his phone had that feature.

 He finds the team in the round table room. His eyes scan the room, landing on JJ’s concerned expression last. He’s surprised to find Will in the room as well. JJ notices him before anyone else.

 “Spence, thank God you’re here. We need fresh eyes.” Before he can protest, Morgan is filling him in on the events that have unfolded.

 “We brought a suspect in from DC, and she knew JJ.” Spencer’s eyes go wide. If the team is in trouble, that could be why Y/N was taken.

 “When I asked her how she knew me, her only response was ‘Henry.’ Something doesn’t add up.” Movement in the doorway catches everyone’s eye.

 “Spencie, did you find Momma yet?” Lily stands in the doorway, looking straight at Spencer.

 “Not yet sweetheart. I have some cookies in my bag, why don’t you go back to my desk and eat them, okay?” 

“Can I have two?” The little girl holds up two of her tiny fingers, unaware of the confused glances from every adult in the room that isn’t Spencer. 

“Of course, sweet pea. Whatever you want. You can even spin around in my chair!” The child nods before running back to Spencer’s desk. Spencer turns around to find all eyes on him. The entire team wears similar expressions of shock and awe.

 “Spencie?” Derek questions the nickname.

 “Sweetheart?” JJ’s more focused on how Spencer responded.

 “Who the heck was that 'sweet pea’ and why have you kept her from me?” Garcia is glaring at Spencer for hiding such a cutie pie from her for however long.

 “She’s why I’m here. Well not her, her mother. We’ve been dating for the last 9 months. I picked up Lily from school today. We were supposed to meet back at her apartment, but she never came home. She’s not answering my calls and I don’t know where she could be.” Spencer breaks down as he tries to explain what’s going on. He can’t imagine a world without you in it.

 “Reid, give Garcia her phone number to track her location. This could all be related to our case. If someone is targeting the BAU, we will find them.” Hotch’s no nonsense tone calms everyone in the room. Again, movement in the doorway catches everyone’s attention.

 “Sir, she keeps saying she can explain everything. I know you said 3 hours, but I think she’s ready now.”

 “Thank you, Anderson. We’ll be right there.” The agent leaves without another word. Hotch turns back to continue filling Spencer in on the case. “Reid, we’ve got a suspect in custody. She doesn’t match the profile, but we think she knows something.”

 “She mentioned a boyfriend in the car. He might know something too.” Morgan pipes in as well.

 “I want to talk to her. If she knows where Y/N is, I have to talk to her.” Spencer is out of the room before anyone can stop him. He’s practically running across the bullpen to get to the interrogation room.

 “Y/N?” Morgan questions to the agents left in the round table room.

 --

 You are so cold. They must have the air turned down to put you on edge. You have finally calmed yourself down enough to form actual sentences instead of useless mumbling.

 “Please. Let me explain! I can tell you everything. Well, not everything, because I don’t know how my signature ended up on that paper, but I can tell you about JJ! And Henry! Let me explain!” You never thought about how weird it would be to know someone could be watching your every move. You feel like you’re talking to nobody as you beg for them to let you explain.

 The door flies open with so much force, you fall out of your chair in shock. There are hands on you, pulling you to your feet before you’ve even registered hitting the ground.

 “Where is sh- Y/N?” Spencer’s tone of voice changes so quickly your brain can’t follow. You just look into his before you burst into tears.

 “Oh thank God. Spencer, I was so scared. I was so nervous when Derek and Rossi came to interview me. I didn’t want them to hate me, you know? Even though they didn’t know who I was. And then I saw JJ, and I got even worse. I mean, she’s your best friend! And she sounded so angry, which was my fault, but I couldn’t even form words to explain myself because I was so sure these people- the people you consider family- were going to hate me and I made everything so much worse. But I-” Spencer knows if he doesn’t cut you off, you’ll ramble endlessly. It’s always like that when you spend too much time alone. As if all the energy you could’ve spent talking to someone pours out of you all at once.

 “Shh, baby, it’s okay. We can explain everything. I’m so happy to see you. To know you’re okay. God, I love you too.” You turn your tear stained face to look up at him.

 “Wha- oh my God. I said that. I didn’t even realize I said it. But it’s true. I love you so much. I can’t imagine a world without you. That’s why I was so nervous about meeting the team. And they wouldn’t let me call you, so I couldn’t ask you what to do.” The two of you continue trying to fill each other in on what has lead you to this moment.

 Hotch and JJ make their way into the room without either of you noticing. They both sit down before either speaks. “Reid, I’m going to need you to leave the room.” Spencer turned around with you still in his arms, your head pulled tight to his chest. He glares at his boss before responding. “No. She didn’t do this. The dates from the case file you gave me, they don’t line up. April 17th, we watched the new episode of Doctor Who and spent the rest of the night discussing theories. April 20th, we went to dinner to celebrate Lily’s sixth birthday. April 22nd we watched Tangled with Lily until she fell asleep and then we…” He trailed off, turning a bright shade of pink. You wiggled in his arms, trying to hide the blush on your face as well.

 “Spence, where’s Lily?” You know he needs to leave if you are ever actually going to get out of this room.

 “She’s at my desk. She looked so tiny in my chair.” He practically has heart eyes as he thinks back to where he left your little girl.

 “Why don’t you go tell her you found me? I’ll be okay.” You wipe the remaining tears from your eyes as you sit back down in the cold metal chair. Spencer looks as though he would rather read Twilight again than leave you, but he reluctantly walks out of the room.

 You start rambling before the agents get a chance to ask you a question.

 “I’m so sorry. I’ve probably wasted so much of your time. I just freaked out when I realized I was meeting Spence’s family. That’s why I know your son’s name.” You turn slightly to look at JJ. “He talks about him all the time, and he’s shown me pictures. I’m so so sorry that you had to worry about your child’s safety because of me. I was just nervous to meet you. That’s why I haven’t met you yet actually. Because I didn’t want Lily to get too attached if something happened and we broke up. Not that I can imagine breaking up with Spencer. I would spend the rest of my life with him if he gave me the chance.” You can feel the tears brimming again. “I really don’t know why my name is on that paper. I never would have signed it! My lab doesn’t use human tissues.” You try to stress that point.

 “Ms. L/N, we believe you. We never thought you were responsible, but it was a suspicious situation. You can never be too careful in our line of work.” Hotch still looks extremely serious, but his tone is slightly more relaxed than when he threw you into this room.

 “Of course. I would’ve thought I was guilty if I didn’t know the truth. Is there anything I can do to help?” You are so relieved to know they don’t think you’re a crazy murderer.

 “We need to ask you a few questions about the people who work in your lab.”

 “Oh. Okay.” You have to actively force yourself not to start rambling again.

 “Do you know any of these people?” The agent shows you three pictures of young women. They couldn’t be more than 25.

 “No…” You can’t put your finger on it, but they look familiar.

 “But?” JJ encourages you to continue.

 “I’m not sure. They look familiar for some reason.” All three women have brunette hair and green eyes. Their face shapes are even shockingly similar.

 “Do you know anyone who looks like these women?” You don’t know how they know that, but you do. They’ve planted the seed, and it instantly grew into a massive oak.

 “I do! Her name is Renee. Um... Renee Watkins. She works in the hospital, in the lab where they run blood tests.” You look at the agents with hope in your eyes. Maybe now they’ll let you leave. They both stand up without saying anything else. Hotch leaves first. JJ stares at you for a minute.

 “I really am sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. It’s just, you’re his best friend. If you hate me, we won’t work. He cares about all of you way too much for me to get in the way of that.” You honestly still feel awful about the unnecessary fear you’ve caused her and her family.

 ���He cares about you too. He’s been happier than I’ve seen him in years. I knew something was up, but I didn’t want to push him.” You can’t keep your smile off your face at her words. “Let’s forget about all of it. I’m just going to focus on the relief of knowing nobody is after my son.”

 “Thank you. I really am so sorry though.” You feel the need to keep apologizing.

 “Really, it’s fine. Come with me, there’s someone I want you to meet.”

 JJ leads you back to the bullpen. Right as you turn the corner, you can spot Spence playing with Lily and Henry. He’s captivated their attention with a magic trick.

 “He’s so good with them.” Almost involuntarily, your hand brushes over your stomach.

 “He’s always wanted to be a father.” JJ eyes your hand before giving you a rather pointed look.

 “Oh! No, I’m not pregnant.” You let your arm fall back to your side. “He’s just so good with Lily; she asked me if he could be her dad.” You can feel the tears coming again. “I just know that one day I will have that man’s babies.” JJ snorts and suddenly the two of you break out laughing. Your laughter makes enough noise to capture Spencer’s attention, two little pairs of eyes following his lead. All three of them are suddenly running across the room to you and JJ.

 Lily jumps into your arms, much as Henry does to JJ. You pull her close, leaning into Spencer as his arms circle around you both. The moment is interrupted when Penelope Garcia comes running into the room.

 “I’ve got him. Shane Harrison, 28. He dated Renee Watkins in high school. He was recently fired from his position in the human tissues lab at Children’s National Hospital. There are reports of him breaking in, although nothing was reported stolen due to falsified transfer documents.”

 “What made him start killing?” Morgan asks while you and JJ desperately cover the children’s ears.

 “Renee recently got engaged. She posted all about her new fiancée on social media. I already texted you the address.” JJ says a rushed goodbye to Will and the team is out the door. Lily runs back over Spencer’s desk with Henry so she can show him the Rubik’s cube.

 “Aren’t you going to help them?” You turn to Spencer who hasn’t left your side.

 “I think they can manage this one without me. I’m needed somewhere else at the moment.” As if to prove his point, he leans in to kiss you. It’s short and sweet and everything you needed at the moment.

 The sound of someone clearing their throat pulls the two of you out of your bubble.

 “Hi, I’m Penelope Garcia. I’m sure the Genius Doctor has told you all about me.”

 “He has indeed. You’re even lovelier in person.” Garcia is just as bright and bubbly as Spencer described her. It makes you smile to think that the team has her never ending positivity while they are surrounded by so much darkness.

 “We are having a team gathering at Rossi’s tomorrow night. You should both come. And Lily!” Garcia smiles again before walking away.

 “You know that means we have to go, right?” Spencer asks you the obvious question.

 “I know honey. You’re afraid of what Garcia could do to you if you get on her bad side.” You laugh at his pout, pulling him down the stairs and over to Lily. It’s about time you all head home.

[fanficsfromyesteryear]

SICK & TIRED

A STRANGER THINGS ONE SHOT

— PAIRING: Billy Hargrove x Reader — WORD COUNT: 2,077 — WARNINGS: Cursing, Billy being...himself — REQUESTED BY: @udontneedtokno 

Um hi, can I request a billy x fem reader where she Is feeling a bit sick and crappy and he takes care of her? Also could you make it so they aren’t dating yet so he’s still a bit of a meanie and flirts pretty hard with her while he’s taking care of her? I love ur billy x readers sm🥺💖

— A/N: First of all, thank you so much?? Honestly, he’s my favorite character to write for. He’s so unapologetically rude and flirtatious, and I think it’s hilarious. Secondly, I’m sooooo sorry about how long this took!! Life got really busy for a while, so I didn’t have much time to sit down and write, but it’s slowed down again for the time being. Anyway, I can’t even tell you how excited I was when I saw your request! I’m such a sucker for sick reader/character storylines, probably because I relate to them so much. Any time my stomach hurts even slightly, you would think I’m dying with how much I milk it. I had lots of fun writing this, and I hope it was worth waiting for!!

Despite your best efforts to convince your mom to let you skip school, she wasn’t having it. For one, she thought you were just being overdramatic—so what if your nose was a little runny? She handed you a pack of Kleenex, forced cough syrup down your throat, and shoved you out the front door with a promise that you would be fine. You weren’t so sure, and your suspicions were only confirmed when you ran out of tissues by the end of first period, and instead of clearing your head, the medicine had only succeeded in making you drowsy. More than once, you felt yourself slipping away from reality—you weren’t quite falling asleep, but you could tell that you weren’t wholly present either. You wanted nothing more than to go home and take a nap, but your mom was at work, and you didn’t trust yourself to walk all that way on your own.

“Wow, Y/N, you look like shit.”

You were standing in the hallway, unsure of how you had come to be there—you must’ve zoned out again. With a blank stare, you turned to look at Billy Hargrove, who was leaning with his back to the locker beside yours. “Thank you,” you said, sniffing. You couldn’t breathe—it felt like you had a thick wad of cotton shoved inside each nostril. “I feel like shit, too.” As if on cue, you let out a sneeze.

Billy backed away, warily studying you. You had dark circles beneath your puffy eyes, and your nose was red and raw from being smothered with one too many tissues. You looked absolutely miserable, and even though a part of him wanted to stay as far away from you as possible—just in case whatever you had was contagious—he felt bad for you more than anything. He reached up to brush aside a stray piece of your hair. “Hey—” Billy was about to say more but stopped himself mid-sentence, his hand lingering on the side of your face as his eyebrows scrunched together. “You’re kinda hot,” he informed you.

Letting out a groan, you rolled your eyes and swatted his hand away. “Billy, I’m not in the mood for any of your—”

“No, seriously. I think you have a fever or something.”

“Wouldn’t surprise me,” you said simply. Turning, you started off down the hallway toward your next class. You’d gotten this far—you might as well stick it out until the end of the day. As much as you didn’t want to be there, you didn’t have much of a choice. You figured you might as well try to carry on like normal.

Billy thought otherwise. You hadn’t gotten far when you felt his hand wrap around your elbow. He pulled you backwards, and in your weakened state, you were in no shape to fight against him.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Billy demanded.

“To class,” you said, your voice muffled by your hand as you wiped your nose on the sleeve of your sweater.

Billy scoffed. “No, you’re not,” he said. “You’re sick.”

“Well, what am I supposed to do?” you whined. “My mom’s at work, and—”

“I’ll take you home,” Billy offered. “I need an excuse to get out of here anyway.” Before you could argue any further, Billy slung his arm around your shoulders and led the way outside.

As the two of you trekked across the parking lot to where his Camaro was parked on top of the hill, you were grateful for how close Billy was—you could lean on him for support whenever the need arose, which proved to be quite often.

Billy made sure to help you into the passenger seat—“Watch where you put your hands, Hargrove”—but as he was climbing into the car himself, he looked to you with an air of seriousness. “You better not puke in here,” he warned. “If you do, you’re cleaning it up.”

“I’m not gonna puke.” You hoped that was true because you knew Billy well enough by now to know that he wasn’t kidding, and you didn’t feel like scrubbing your own throw up out of his car’s upholstery.

As the Camaro pulled out onto the main road, you could feel your eyelids growing heavy. At some point, you must’ve drifted off because by the time Billy’s car came to a stop in front of your house, he glanced over to find you fast asleep. Billy yanked his keys out of the ignition and got out with a heavy sigh. As he bent down to scoop you up, he grumbled about how you were going to give him whatever the hell was plaguing you. He concluded with, “Be glad you’re cute,” before kicking the car door shut and walking up the driveway.

Once inside, Billy dumped you onto the couch in the living room. He stepped back and stared at you for a moment with crossed arms as he tried to assess the situation. What had he gotten himself into? He didn’t know the first thing about taking care of sick people—he avoided sick people, mainly because he couldn’t be bothered with them, not to mention how gross they were. You were different, though, and Billy mentally kicked himself for feeling that way. All this trouble just to get you to like him? It was a new low.

When you awoke, you were surprised to find yourself inside your house with a blanket thrown across you, alongside Billy, who was sitting on the other end of the couch with your feet in his lap. You couldn’t remember having walked in—maybe that cough medicine was still messing with your head—and you hadn’t expected Billy to stick around. You had assumed he’d drop you off and then be on his merry way. As far as you could tell, he wasn’t exactly a nurturer. At the very least, you doubted this was how he wanted to be spending his time away from school.

As soon as Billy felt you stirring, he glanced over tentatively and caught sight of you staring at him. He raised his eyebrows in question. “What?” he asked.

You shrugged. “I didn’t expect you to still be here,” you answered.

Billy looked almost offended at this. “And leave my favorite girl to die alone? I would never.”

A small laugh escaped your chapped lips. “I’m not dying,” you said, poking Billy’s knee with the toe of your sneaker. “At least, I won’t be once I take the right medicine.” You must’ve slept off the effects of the cough syrup your mom had given you—you were no longer insufferably tired, which was a plus, but the congestion in your head had culminated into a headache, and it had brought a side of chills with it. You swung your legs over the side of the couch and were about to get up when Billy stopped you.

“No,” Billy said, pushing you back down. “I’ll get it.”

You told Billy where the bathroom was and what to grab—“Aspirin’s fine”—then he disappeared down the hallway branching off of your living room. You were no expert on what the average time should’ve been for completing such a task, but after several minutes had passed and Billy still hadn’t returned, you started to wonder what was taking so long.

The answer to your silent question came in the form of Billy irritably yelling, “Y/N, why do you have so much shit in here?”

Grumbling, you rose from your spot on the couch and shuffled into the bathroom. “What do you mean?” you asked.

Billy turned to find you standing at his elbow, wrapped up in a blanket somewhat reminiscent of the way E.T. had been in the flying bike scene. Only your pouting face protruded from the folds of fabric. The blond couldn’t help cracking a smile at your appearance—comical, yet undeniably cute—and just like that, he had forgotten what it was that had caused your sudden presence.

You took no time jogging Billy’s memory. “It’s right there,” you said, your eyes resting on a bottle sitting on the bottom shelf of your medicine cabinet. A moment later, your hand poked through the blanket and seized the small container. You bumped Billy out of the way as you popped a pill into your mouth and stepped in front of the sink to pour yourself a glass of water. By the time you’d swallowed, he was gone.

“Billy?” you called, stepping out of the bathroom.

Billy’s voice came from somewhere down the hall, saying, “Holy shit, Y/N, is this your room?”

You appeared behind Billy in an instant, latching onto his arm and giving it a tug. “Oh, my God,” you said, your face burning. “Don’t go in there. It’s a mess!”

Being the sort of person that likes to do the exact opposite of what he’s told, Billy easily pulled free from your grasp and wandered inside. He was like a kid in a candy shop as he admired the things lining your shelves—trinkets, books, records, and the like—with wide eyes. Bedrooms tell a lot about the person to whom they belong, and boy, was Billy learning about you.

“And, who is this?” Billy asked with a devious smile as he picked up the faded brown teddy bear that had been lodged between the pillows on your bed.

Groaning, you buried your face in your hands, the soft fabric of the blanket covering your eyes. You wished the floor would open up and swallow you whole. If you had known that Billy Hargrove, of all people, was going to be in your room later, you would’ve made an effort that morning to clean up a bit—at the very least, you would’ve hidden anything embarrassing.

You risked a peek up at Billy, but he wasn’t where you’d last seen him. Instead, he’d moved over to your dresser and was rummaging through its drawers. How typical, you thought with a roll of your eyes. I look away for one second, and already, he’s trying to find my underwear.

Billy achieved his goal, too—you could tell by the cheeky grin on his face. His gaze cut over to you, then back down to the contents of the drawer in front of him, nodding thoughtfully all the while. He was about to pull something out, but you intervened—extending an arm, you slammed the wooden compartment shut, and if Billy hadn’t been so quick to pull his hands out of the way, he would’ve gotten his fingers smashed.

“That’s enough of that,” you said, grabbing Billy’s hand and dragging him back into the living room.

“You’re no fun,” Billy complained.

Both of you returned to your spots on the couch in moody silence. You tried to cross your arms, but you stopped abruptly when you realized that your fingers were still entwined with Billy’s. Blushing, you glanced down at your hands, then up at him, however, he didn’t seem to be paying you any mind. He was facing the wall directly opposite the couch with his eyes closed.

“What are you doing?” you asked.

Billy raised an eyebrow in acknowledgment. “Trying to picture you in that underwear,” he stated simply, the corners of his mouth turning up slightly.

You snatched your hand away to shove him with it. “You’re the worst, Billy Hargrove,” you said, but you couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped your mouth afterward.

“Damn it, Y/N,” Billy said. “I can’t concentrate with you giggling like that.”

“Good!” you remarked, nose held in the air as you squinted tauntingly at Billy.

Despite the two of you constantly teasing each other, you actually felt substantially better by the time Billy left your house that afternoon to pick Max up from school. He may not have been a doctor in the making, but where he lacked in nurturing qualities, he made up for with playful flirting and good company, and as they say, laughter’s the best medicine. You thought your troubles were over until you woke up the next morning to the sound of your phone ringing.

“Hello?”

You were answered with a sneeze from the other end of the line, followed by a hoarse voice saying, “This is your fault.”

“Aw, Billy, are you sick?” you asked, feigning surprise as you bit back a chuckle.

“Yeah, I’m sick,” Billy whined. “Get over here and fix it.”

“What’s the magic word?”

Another sneeze, then, “Now.”

And your mom thought you were dramatic when you were sick. As if.

[thefactsofthematter]

we’ve all lost our way before

a bittersweet, jack-and-medda-centred prequel to this fic i wrote last year. no one requested this, i just felt like pouring out some emotions, so if you’d like to Feel Things with me, be my guest! this can be read as a standalone fic as well, if you haven’t read the original.

read this on ao3 if you want!

javid (sort of); 2.3k; modern au; warning for drug abuse, addiction, and overdose. 

- 

Jack is nineteen when he overdoses for the first time.

The saddest part is that he sees it as a strange sort of victory. He's been playing with fire for four or five years now, but only just OD'd. No one— at least not anyone important to him��� will know that he was hooked on drugs as a literal child... they'll think of this as a recent problem, that art school was the catalyst in turning him into a junkie. He thinks it might be less shameful this way.

Medda is there when he wakes up in the hospital. He knows exactly what's going on as soon as he comes to consciousness— the familiar ache in his joints tells him that a withdrawal is starting to hit, and the rhythmic beeping, in sync with his heartbeat, is enough to fill in the story of just what happened. He overdid it.

"Mama..." he groans, hardly able to open his eyes. He reaches weakly towards where he can see her sitting in a chair and typing on her phone, with a nervous scrunch to her eyebrows.

She looks up, and then she's there in an instant, right beside him to take his hand.

"Oh Jack..." she whispers, wrapping both her hands around one of his and squeezing. Her voice is wet, like she's been crying. "What've you done to yourself, baby?"

There's a lot he wants to say— that he's ruined his own life, and he's sorry, and he can't believe he's done this to her, and he probably should've just died from the overdose so she wouldn't have to deal with him anymore, and he's so so so sorry for everything. None of those words leave his mouth, though.

"I did something bad, didn't I?" he mumbles, feeling his fingers twitch between her hands, but not quite in control of the movement. The doctors must be medicating him somehow, because this isn't a normal comedown. Why is he so tired?

"You sure did," she sighs. She pauses and swallows, as if she's trying to figure out what to say. She finally shakes her head and continues. "You overdosed on heroin, Jack— I found you on the bathroom floor, and your lips and fingers were blue. I thought you were dead."

Jack feels a horrible, horrible little ball of shame start to twist in his gut. It's not regret, necessarily, but he feels bad that she had to see that. He feels bad that he scared her, and that he's making her deal with all this now. He's a horrible son.

"I'm sorry," he says, and his words shake and his fingers twitch again, the nervous jitter that comes with the drugs leaving his system. "I didn't mean to."

She closes her eyes for a second and then nods. He can tell she's trying to be empathetic, and that she's angry with him but she doesn't want to show him that.

"I know you didn't," she says. "I know, darling." She rubs her thumb in little circles on the back of his hand. "But did you even think for a second, when you decided to shoot up in there, that one of the boys could've found you?"

This is a point that she likes to drive home whenever he's in trouble. Jack is the oldest of four, and he needs to be responsible because his brothers look up to him. He was a teenager when she adopted him, and he knew that by joining the family, he was stepping up to be a role model for Crutchie, Race, and Albert. He'd been so honoured, and he really thought he could do it, at the time.

"No," he finally croaks, because of course he didn't consider it— he wasn't planning on overdosing. "I'm sorry."

The youngest, Albert, is only twelve— and even at that, he's awfully naive for his age. He probably doesn't even know what heroin is or what it can do, and now Medda's going to have to tell him that his brother almost died from it. Of course the boys are going to ask questions, and Jack knows Medda will answer them honestly. She's not a fan of keeping secrets.

"How long have you been doing this?" she asks, after a moment. She sounds so hurt, like the thought of Jack's addiction physically pains her. It makes him want to vomit. "The doctor said some of the needle marks on your arms look like they've been there for years. When did it start?"

Jack can't bring himself to answer. It's too embarrassing.

He was such a stupid, gullible fourteen year-old that he let the older boys in his last foster home before Medda's place do this to him— it was a group home where they were horribly abused in every way you can possibly think of, and everyone was searching for a way to cope. They told him drugs would make everything better, and they held his arm still while they injected him with the tiniest amount of heroin, and suddenly he wasn't scared or in pain anymore. He couldn't feel anything. It was the best he's ever felt, and he knew right then that this was going to become a problem. His parents had been addicts, he knew it ran in his blood, but he let himself fall into the trap anyways. It's horrible.

"I want to go to sleep now," is all he says, purposefully avoiding the question. His eyes feel droopy and heavy, and the ache of the withdrawal is growing stronger, and he knows that if he doesn't sleep now it'll only get worse.

"Please, Jack," Medda whispers, not giving it up. She's squeezing his hand almost desperately. "How long?"

He lets his eyes fall shut and weakly attempts to wrench his hand away from hers.

"I'm tired, Mama."

A heavy sigh.

"Okay."

She lets go of his hand and moves instead to pet his hair, even as he turns his face away from her and tries to roll onto his side in a pitiful attempt to show that he wants to be left alone. She hums softly as she does so, and it makes Jack's chest feel tight like he's going to cry. He finally has a mother who loves him, after all these years of wishing for one, and all he can do is disappoint her.

-

Medda is on the phone the next time he's awake.

"Did you know he was abusing drugs, David?" she asks, and her tone is almost accusatory, like she thinks Davey had something to do with this. "He overdosed on heroin last night."

Davey must panic on the other end of the call, because her tone suddenly goes much softer.

"No, no, he's okay. He's in the hospital, but he'll be alright." She pauses and sighs. "The doctor said it looks like he's been using for a couple years, at least. You didn't know?"

Jack decides not to open his eyes just yet— he's nauseous and his stomach aches. He's sure that if he were to force himself to vomit it might alleviate it somewhat, but he wants to hear what Medda and Davey might talk about, so he just doesn't move.

"Okay," Medda sighs. "I understand. I had no idea either— it's scary how well he hid it. He overdosed in the bathroom at home; he must've been using drugs in the house this whole time, and I never caught on."

Jack's awfully ashamed of that bit. He didn't used to do it at home— he only did it on occasion when he was younger, and he'd save it for when he was with friends, or if he had a really bad day. It's just the past few months that have gotten so bad... he can't go a day without it anymore. He gets dope sick, craves his next dose until he can finally shoot up, and it doesn't even really get him high. He needs heroin to feel normal these days. He's been at home, around his little brothers, with that god-awful drug coursing through his body. He hates himself so, so deeply for that.

He needs help. He knows he needs help. But he somehow doesn't want it— he knows it won't work. He'll end up checking himself out of rehab, or wherever Medda tries to send him, and he'll go right back to the drugs. Being sober is hard, and being high is easy. He likes that easy, relaxed feeling, and he knows that any amount of time he spends sober will just make the next high feel even better.

"I'm going to try to get him straight from the hospital into rehab," Medda says on the phone, which makes Jack feel horrible that he's already planning on refusing that idea. "You've got school, sweetheart, this isn't your responsibility. Come by for a visit if you'd like, but don't get to thinking you have to look after him or anything... oh, I know you love him. I know, dear. But you have to put yourself first, alright?"

Jack doesn't like listening to this anymore. Medda's going to convince Davey to break up with him, isn't she? She doesn't think Jack deserves to have a boyfriend as lovely as Davey, since he's such a disappointment— she's right, but it makes his chest ache anyways.

"Mama," he groans, finally letting her know he's awake. He feels like a helpless little kid as he reaches out for her yet again. "I feel sick. I'm gonna puke."

The light hurts his eyes as he opens them, and he barely registers Medda pressing a little paper bowl into his hands for him to vomit into. He leans forward and gags into it, squeezing his eyes shut to block out the sunlight while she rubs a hand gently up and down his back.

"I'll let you go, Davey," she sighs into the phone. "Text me when you get here, alright?"

Jack tries to ask if that means Davey is coming to see him, but it comes out a little garbled when he realizes he's not done throwing up. He interrupts himself to shove his face back in the little bowl and heave yet again. It takes until he's finished puking to realize that he began to cry somewhere in the middle of it, hot tears rolling down his cheeks.

"Mama, I'm so sorry," he finally says, once he's sure it's over. He leans his head back against the pillows and finally says the words he's been dreading. "I... If you don't want me anymore, I understand. It's okay."

This must catch Medda off-guard, because it takes her a second to process it. She's perfectly calm as she takes the little bowl from him and sets it somewhere for a nurse to take away, but then she turns back around to him with a confused frown.

"Hang on, what?" she asks. "Jack, baby, what are you talking about? Where did you get that idea from?"

Truthfully, the thought hasn't fully left his mind since the day they signed the adoption papers, a little over two years ago. He's always figured that she'd get sick of him at some point— he's even looked into how an adoption can be annulled, so that he's prepared for when the day eventually comes. She'll realize he's not worth all the trouble he causes, she'll see how messed up he is, and she'll get rid of him for good.

"I ruined everything," he mumbles, not quite able to look her in the eyes. He wipes pitifully at the tears on his cheeks and forces himself to keep talking. "If you want to, like, cancel out the adoption... that's alright. It's not fair that you have to deal with me when I'm so awful."

She's silent for a second, and Jack is sure that this is it. She'll undo the adoption, kick him out of the family, and he'll be all on his own again. He doesn't want that, of course, but he understands why she would do it.

"John Francis Kelly," she finally says, and she comes over to the bed to cup his cheeks and hold onto his face. "Look at me. Nothing you could ever say or do could make me even consider that. Not in a million years. Do you hear me? Nothing could ever, ever make me stop loving you."

This is where Jack finally breaks. She's too good to him— he can't understand what he's done in his fucked-up life to deserve to meet someone like her. He's done nothing to earn her love, but she gives it to him unconditionally anyways, and he simply can't comprehend it. He sobs, leaning forward into her arms; she hugs him tight and just holds him there.

"You're my son, Jack," she whispers, as his head rests in the crook of her neck and she rocks him back and forth. "Okay? It doesn't matter that I've only had you for a few years... that doesn't make it any less real. No matter how many mistakes you make— no matter what you do or where you are, I'll always be your mother. You're not getting rid of me." She gently combs her fingers through the hair at the back of his neck. "You got yourself into a tough spot, but we'll get you out, baby. You're gonna be okay."

"I'm sorry," Jack sobs, as if he hasn't said it enough today. "I didn't mean for this to happen."

"I know," Medda replies. "I know, baby. You made some mistakes, but it's not the end of the world. We're gonna fix it together, alright?"

Jack can do nothing more than cry at this point, so Medda just rubs his back and pets his hair. She shushes him softly, as if she's soothing an infant, and he simply clings onto her for dear life. He doesn't deserve how wonderful she is.

[apenapaperandadoofus]

Can i request seven with mc who is being kidnapped (posibbly getting hurt/tortured) because of sometrouble related to seven's agency work, maybe they want revenge or smth, its up to you mc ends up dead or alive when seven finally found her (i prefer her dead but idk tbh i just want to see saeyeong suffer rn lmao, and i like to watch my own heart breaking after that T-T) THANKYOUU IF YOU R DOING IT ♡♡

Oh shit hell yeah T_T

I think I made it a bit dark, so maybe we’ll add a happy end

ALSO HEY! Listen to the saddest song you can if you want to! That way you can get the full experience lmao

Regret:

(Saeyoung x MC, TW: May include mentions of suicide, sexual abuse, and torture, so if you feel uncomfortable with any of this please don’t read it! I think I made this a bit too dark, so please watch out!)

The sun was setting. It had gotten cold, since they were in a mountain. There was no sound, and only if you were paying attention, you would notice the three men hiding behind some trees and bushes.

A bit farther away you could see a big old building. A few men guarding the entrance.

To Saeyoung Choi, the building gave him the feeling as if he was suffocating. But right now he couldn’t focus on that.

He was currently hacking into the building’s security cameras. He was checking the layout of the place, checking how many guards there were, places to hide and places where you might be locked up.

“Hey, zero seven, are you sure they aren’t leading us straight into a trap? It was way too easy to find them, barely took us a month. You know better than anyone that finding their spots takes way longer than that.” Vanderwood said, as he took one last puff from his cigarette and threw it on the ground, stepping on it to put it off.

“Lets just trust him for now. And could you please not smoke in the forest? You’re making me want to puke.” Saeran, who was crouching beside his brother glared.

“Hey, I didn’t even want to come here. The least you could do is let me have one last cigarette if I die.” But Vanderwood silently complied and didn’t touch a cigarette again.

Finally Saeyoung, who was looking at his computer intensely turned around and ran a hand through his hair. “Alright, I memorized the layout. I know places where we can hide, and I think I know where she is being held. We’re going in at midnight.”

Both men nodded and waited until the time came.

.............

“Where is she?! Did you have anything to do with this?!”

Saeyoung grabbed Vanderwood by the collar and shook him, hard. He scoffed and glared at Saeyoung.

“I left the agency with you, remeber?! Why would I be back again with them, that place is fucked up...and...if they got hold of her then we should give up. She’s probably already dead.”

Before Vanderwood could say anything else he felt an immense wave of pain on his cheek. Saeyoung had just...punched him. He had the nerve to punch him.

That night, well, both men ended up bruised. But then Vanderwood saw how much he cared. And how much it hurt him.

He agreed to help, but only if he got a reward. He said he only did it because he wanted to make some quick cash, but deep inside, Vanderwood was also worried. He honestly didn’t want anything to happen to you.

............

Saeran wasn’t allowed to go in, so he stayed outside, trying to look out for any danger.

If Saeyoung or Vanderwood sent him an SOS he was supposed to immediately leave, and send some coordinates to the chatroom. Jumin would know what to do.

Of course Saeran got mad. Saeyoung said he was only trying to protect him, but he wasn’t having any of that shit.

When Vanderwood and Saeyoung left for the building, they hadn’t made up, and Saeran was still mad.

Both men made their way slowly to the building. Saeyoung had always preferred being sneaky instead of taking out every guard they found. But Vanderwood decided to not take any chances, and whenever he could he would kill one of the guards.

Still, they walked quietly, hiding in the shadows, and of course they went unnoticed I mean, both of them were the best of the best. Sneaking through those guards was a piece of cake.

Slowly, Saeyoung and Vanderwood reached the third floor. In there, Vanderwood had to take care of a few...nuisances....but quickly the made it into the door and opened it.

The room smelled horrible. It smelled strongly of iron, and of something...rotten.

There was an endless pile of corpses in front of them. Saeyoung quickly got over to it, searching and scanning, hoping that it wasn’t true, that he was wrong.

“Zero seven!!! In here!” Vanderwood screamed and Saeyoung quickly looked behind him.

Vanderwood was in a corner, his gun pointing at the door. “You go get her out while I look out for any more guards.”

Saeyoung quickly nodded and went over to where Vanderwood had pointed.

And he felt his knees buckle.

You were tied up, undressed, with your arms above your head, your face and body filled with cuts and bruises.

Parts of your stomach were a deep purple, and your arms had x’s cut all over them.

Saeyoung...he froze.

Seeing you like that.

It was his worst nightmare.

It was the one scenario that had always haunted him, that made him unable to sleep at night.

And it was happening right now.

Saeyoung made his way over to you, and you let out a dry gasp as you tried to squirm. Saeyoung felt his heart crack as he saw your terrified eyes look up at him.

But then...your expression. It changed. It went from scared...to being glad. To being happy.

Saeyoung...he thought he’d never see that expression again.

“Sae...Sae...young? Sae...young is...is it....really you? I’m...I’m not....dreaming am I?” Your voice cracked, as you tried to let the words out, and your eyes started filling with tears.

Saeyoung sniffed and he cupped your cheeks.

“It’s me. Y/N....it’s, it’s really me...”

When he broke your chains you fell to the ground, but Saeyoung quickly caught you and hugged you, running his hands through your hair, crying, sobbing. You were alive....you were alive and he had found you.

Saeyoung took off his sweater, and gave it to you. As he helped you out it on, he slowly looked at your body.

Cuts and bruises. All recent. He saw them on your neck, on your legs, everywhere. He had to control himself to not go on a murder spree right then and there.

“Hey. We don’t have much time. Move it.”

Vanderwood said, and then his eyes widened as he took a good look at you. His hand tightened around his gun, and his expression became dark. He didn’t say anything, but he along with Saeyoung helped you stand up.

You could barely walk, since your legs were so beaten up.

The whole time Saeyoung carried you he cried. He just...this was all his fault. Everything.

He was so shcoked that he could barely breathe, everytime he looked at you he felt a pamg on his chest. This was all because of him.

You quietly made your way down to the first floor, you whimpering every time you walked a bit.

“Hey...hey Y/N. Look at me. It’s going to be alright, everything is ok.” Saeyoung tried to encourage you, to try and show you he was confident everything would turn out alright.

But he was lying.

He knew that as soon as you got to a hospital he had to leave. Leave you, leave his brother, leave the RFA, everything. If he stayed...he would only hurt them. He would hurt you.

“SAEYOUNG FUCKING MOVE THEY’RE BEHIND US” Vanderwood screamed, and Saeyoung snapped out of it.

He carried you on his back, running as fast as he could, the guards close behind you.

Gunshots and yells could be heard everywhere, Vanderwood kept turning around to try and shoot, but he only managed to get a few guys.

You cried, as you heard shots so near you, so near Saeyoung.

You didn’t want him to be hurt.

Then, as you were finally near to the exit, only three guys remaining, Saeyoung screamed and fell, bringing you down with him.

Vanderwood cursed everything, and turned back to shoot at the other guys, trying to cover you both.

You slowly crawled over to Saeyoung, who was on the floor, screaming in pain.

They shot him in the leg.

You cried, as you tried to stop the bleeding, but Saeyoung managed to stand up.

He didn’t hear yours or Vanderwood’s protest as he grabbed your arm and led you outside.

Thankfully, Vanderwood managed to hurt all of the remaining guards, shooting them in the legs, and making them unable to move.

Vanderwood came out first and called out to Saeran, telling him to call an ambulance, now.

Saeyoung thightly gripped your hand, and led you out of the building.

He let out a sigh of relief when he saw the blue night sky above him. And he couldn’t help but smile.

They got out.

You were safe.

You were alive.

Saeyoung couldn’t believe it. His heart was pounding and he could barely make out the yells of Vanderwood and Saeran in the distance, and they ran toward him.

He squeezed your hand, not caring about his wound, not caring about anything. He was just happy, to finally be getting out of that horrible place.

But then the next thing he heard, was a deafening explosion behind him.

...........

“I love you so much.” Saeyoung whispered, and you blushed, hiding underneath the sheets. He laughed and pulled them down.

“What? I really do. I love you. A lot. So much that....that I want to have a future with you. I want to take it to the next step. I’m serious.” You giggled and smiled up at your boyfriend, who grabbed you and held you tight, both of your bare chests against each other.

“Saeyoung Choi, are you proposing to me right after we had sex?” You said teasingly, and Saeyoung chuckled.

“Even though this may have been the best sex we’ve ever had, I’m afraid not. But don’t worry, one of these day’s I’ll catch you by surprise, and you’d better say yes. I’m not kidding Y/N.” He caressed your cheek and kissed your forehead.

“I want to marry you. And I will. I want to spend every single moment of my life with you. I want us to get a big house, with a huge backyard. And then, we can modify it so it becomes the coolest house ever!”

“Ohhh can we have a chandelier that pours the drinks?!” You asked excitedly, and Saeyoung nodded.

“Yes ma’am! Even Jumin will be jealous of our home! And after the house is done...well... I want to start a family. I want to see our kids take their first steps, build robots. I want them to have...the childhood I never had. I want to make them the happiest children on earth. And then, before we know it, they’ll get in first grade, and in the blink of an eye they’ll be graduating, and out of the house. They’ll get jobs, their own partners, if they want they’ll even have kids! Or cats, I’m happy with either. And we...we will still be together.”

Saeyoung kissed you and then gave you the brightest smile. “I want us to grow old together in that house. We’ll be taking walks in the garden, or we can read some books. Sometimes dance slowly in the kitchen, our favorite song playing. And I will make sure that happens Y/N. I promise...and you’d better promise too! If you’re with me, you’re stuck with me for the long run!” You laughed and pinched his cheeks.

“Of course I promise! Let’s grow old together, Saeyoung!!”

.........

There was smoke.

The smell of metal, and burning flesh.

Saeyoung looked around, coughing, and then he realized what had happened.

The building had blown up.

Wait...where were you!!?

Saeyoung looked around, his heart about to go out of his chest.

I mean, he was holding your hand wasn’t he? He was?

He could...he could even feel it still around him.

Saeyoung sighed and looked to his side, ready to carry you up and get you away from there.

But then...you weren’t there.

But....he was....holding your.....

Saeyoung looked down, and saw a bloody arm tightly around his hand.

Then everything went black.

He didn’t hear anything.

He couldn’t feel.

He couldn’t think.

He didn’t feel the burns in his back.

Or his broken leg.

Or when Saeran ran over to him and shook him, screaming something.

Saeyoung didn’t notice when a helicopter arrived, and Jumin and some paramedics got out of it.

He was...his head was....it was blank.

If you ask him about the following weeks after the incident, Saeyoung couldn’t reply.

He didn’t remeber.

Everyday, Saeran would come and visit his brother and Vanderwood, who had been hit by a rock and was currently unable to wake up.

The doctors said, ironically, that Saeyoung was absolutely lucky, he did get some very grave burns and everything, but he was somehow still alive!

But he wasn’t either of those things.

The love of his life had been blown to pieces in front of him.

And inside...he didn’t even feel alive anymore.

He didn’t want to...live anymore.

Saeyoung only ate when they forced him to eat, and he only slept when they forced him to sleep.

Saeran would always visit him.

He knew...he knew what it was like. To feel nothing, to not think or to not feel.

And Saeran...he cared for his brother. Deeply.

Saeyoung never noticed him. But sometimes Saeran would go to the corner and cry a bit.

After all....Saeyoung wasn’t Saeyoung anymore.

..........

“Hey.” Saeyoung heard a deep voice call from behind.

He didn’t turn around.

“Oh wow Vanderwood, you woke up? Why yes Saeyoung I did, thanks for caring about me you little brat”

Vanderwood said sarcastically, and then he plopped down on a chair near the bed.

He was wearing a bandage around his head, and he looked thinner.

Vanderwood looked at Saeyoung for a while, and then he gently placed a hand on his head.

“Kid. I’m sorry. She was...she was amazing wasn’t she? Always positive, smiling. Y/N, she made all of our lives better. That’s what she always did.”

Saeyoung clutched his fists when he heard your name.

Before Vanderwood could say anything else Saeyoung spoke up.

“Leave. And don’t say her name ever again or I swear I will fuckign murder you.” He said coldly.

Vanderwood’s eyes widened, and he stood up and stomped out of the room, slamming the door.

Saeyoung immediately regretted his words. But he only bit his lip and quietly cried until he fell asleep.

.........

The funeral was held after Saeyoung had healed. Fully. There was no problem delaying it, since there was literally no body.

Everyone in the RFA showed up.

The day was sunny, and Saeyoung bitterly laughed as he thought that of course the day of your funeral you’d make the weather be so perfect.

.......

Saeran made Saeyoung see a therapist.

Saeyoung didn’t want to. He refused.

But one night Saeran couldn’t find his brother anywhere, and he saw that one of the cars wasn’t in the garage.

He managed to track his twin’s phone, and he quickly drove over to where Saeyoung was, not caring about following any of the signs or to care about other cars.

He got there quickly. And he saw Saeyoung....standing on top of a cliff.

Saeran felt his heart drop, and he slowly made his way to his brother.

“S-Saeyoung! Please listen to me!” Saeran begged. He had been doing that for so long now, every time getting more and more desperate. Saeyoung shook his head and explained that he was a failure, he was only going to cause harm.

“Just, let me be Saeran! You’ll all be better of without me...”

“Don’t say that you fuckign bastard.” Saeran grabbed Saeyoung’s shoulders when he least expected it, and quickly pinned him down. “I NEED YOU SAEYOUNG. I really do! Please, PLEASE don’t make this stupid fucking mistake! You think Y/N would have liked that?! For you to become a mess, to KILL yourself? I’m pretty sure she’d kick your ass if you ever even thought of that!”

Saeyoung looked at his brother, an emotionless expression on his face. He didn’t seem to care that Saeran was crying for him. That he was yelling at him, telling him to stop, that he loves him, and that he doesn’t know what he would do without his brother.

After that he went to a therapist. Even though it did take time, Saeyoung got a bit better. He started talking more, and he didn’t stay in his room all the time.

Recently he’d been prescribed anti depressants, so that was supposed to be helping him.

But Saeyoung still felt empty.

.........

“Y/N. Y/N was...is...the love of my life. You know, I promised her I’d never stop loving her, and I never will. She was...the light of the RFA. She helped us all., she was always there for us. Now...now that she’s gone....everything seems so colorless...meaningless. She was one of the few people who...who saw me for me. She put up with all my shit, always with a smile on her face, no matter how much of an asshole I was, she’d be there. She was there for all of us. Now...now whenever I wake up it’s in an empty bed. I won’t get to hear her cooking in the kitchen, dancing or singing along to cheesy pop songs again. She won’t be there to watch those cringy reality tv shows, to, to nag me when I don’t eat something healthy. I always thought that...that we’d end up together forever, which is why I never really appreciated those moments. I’m sure she’s nagging at me right now for being so depressed. Y/N...Y/N...she, she didn’t deserve this. If I could go back in time...I’d make sure that instead of her, it was me. She’s a much better person, and she didn’t deserve any of this and....I’m sorry. I should probably shut up now, uhm, Jumin it’s your turn.”

Saeyoung left the funeral early. He couldn’t handle it.

Saeran offered to bring him home, but he smiled and told him it’s alright. He was just a bit tired.

As soon as he turned on the car, the radio started to play your favorite song. And he tightened his hands around the wheel.

He rode home, silently.

He didn’t bother to turn on the lights. He quickly went to the bathroom, and washed his face. When he looked in the mirror, he could barely recognize himself. His eyes were red, with big eye bags, and his hair was greasy and messy. It had been so long since he last got a haircut.

He looked awful.

Then he went to his bedroom, and grabbed something from under the bed.

It was a red box.

Saeyoung made his way to the bathroom once again, and sat on the toilet, slowly opening the box.

Inside was a beautiful ruby ring.

He had gotten it six months before you got kidnapped.

He was going to propose soon.

But you had a fight.

He doesn’t even remeber what it was about.

But that day you went home early and Saeyoung went over to Yoosung’s, along with Saeran.

When he came back home to apologize, the place was a mess and you weren’t around.

He spent sleepless nights looking for you, finding out everything he could.

And then he screwed everything up.

If only it had been him the one who died.

If only you had never tried to get close to him, if only you had fallen in love with someone else.

You’d be alive right now.

Saeyoung sobbed, and squeezed the ring tightly in his hand.

“I’m sorry my love. I’m so sorry that I couldn’t protect you. That I wasn’t strong enough. And I’m sorry....about what I want to do. Please forgive me.”

And with that, Saeyoung got on top of the toilet and managed to lift a part of the roof up. It was one of his hiding spots.

Right now, Saeran was doing amazing. Vanderwood too. Everyone in the RFA would slowly feel better, they would manage to accept what happened and will surely, but slowly move on ....except him.

Saeyoung sat on the toilet again, and placed the cool metal object against his head, tears slowly streaming down.

He closed his eyes, and imagined your face, your sweet laugh.

He imagined the both of you holding each other in a heated embrace, or watching movies together, or even traveling the world!

“Y/N...I’ll be there soon...I don’t want to hurt anyone else.”

As he smiled bitterly, fantasizing and remembering all the moments he spent with you....he pulled the trigger.

———-

Jesus Christ, I’m so sorry if that was way too dark. If MC died because of soemthing like the agency...Saeyoung wouldn’t forgive himself. No matter what.

He will blame himself and will try to distance himself so that no one else encounters the same faith. Once again, sorry for making it super angsty

If you have any advice for my writing it’d be greatly appreciated!

[apiratewhopines]

Killian, Persuaded

Chapter Nine - Speed with Secrecy

Summary: In which our hero spins his wheels

Chapter Nine on AO3

“And I will wait here awhile

Just long enough to be

Sure that you

Didn’t make a wrong turn”

-Wrong Turn, Jack Johnson

When you didn’t work, every day felt like the weekend. Even though he was now employed, his schedule was so light he may as well have not been working so the principle held.

However, that didn’t mean Killian was unfamiliar with the concept of waiting for the weekend, working for the weekend, Monday blues, and so on and so forth. Unfortunately, since he came to Storybrooke and tumbled head over heels for Emma again he found himself dreading this most sacred of times.

Especially this weekend.

The reasons were simple really. During the week, he had two chances to run into Emma every day since Henry joined them on their transit to and from school. But on the weekends it was a crapshoot honestly. If he was lucky, he spent hours of uninterrupted time with her while she visited her best friend and his nieces. Then some weekends he didn’t see hide nor hair of her. Those were the hardest times.

Especially this weekend.

Honestly, would it have killed her to pop over and let them know if she was engaged or not? Didn’t women normally want to gush or commiserate over their relationships? Surely she wasn’t so busy she couldn’t tell them what happened after she ran away from the man who wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.

Well, one of the men who wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.

Her boyfriend. Wanker extraordinaire. Maybe fiancé now.

Since he apparently lacked subtlety, he didn’t bother to conceal his interest in the comings and goings at their neighbor’s house from his family. They were wise to him anyway so what was the point. The absence of Walsh’s car was noted, and celebrated, when he walked the kids back from their Halloween dance. Since then, he hadn’t seen the man or his vehicle or Emma dragging an obnoxiously large diamond behind her when she left for work.

He kept reminding himself these were all good signs.

“Did you know one of your friends hit on her every time your back was turned?”

“Honestly, the only part that shocks me is there was only one who tried,” he replied, switching his focus away from the window to his sister-in-law. Elsa looked more rumpled than usual. Her long hair was down, perhaps for the first time since he moved in with them, and she was still in her pajamas despite the fact it was almost dinner time. She was sick most of the night with an upset stomach and the smell of eggs at breakfast that morning was enough to send her running to the bathroom all over again. She slept most of the day, leaving Liam to run the girls to all their practices.

When his brother asked him to stick around in case Elsa woke up and needed anything, he happily complied. All the better to scope out the neighborhood, or one neighbor as the case may be. Although his sister-in-law hadn’t left the bedroom, he brought her a cup of mint tea and a few crackers around lunchtime. The quiet of the house made him wonder how he had lived in his silent penthouse for so long.

She sank on the other end of the couch and stretched her legs out until her feet rested in his lap. “I feel terrible. Distract me before I puke again. Tell me a story.”

“A story? Darling, I only know tragedies. Perhaps we could play charades instead.”

Leaning her head back against the arm of the sofa, she watched him through narrowed eyes. She looked worse for wear, pale and weak from the unknown illness. Taking one of her feet between his hands, he began to massage her arch. Softly, she picked up on her earlier comment, “I think his name was Chipper.”

“Aye, that makes sense. He was a bastard.” Absentmindedly, he continued to knead her feet, alternating between the two until he thought she may have fallen asleep. When he glanced over to check, he found he was still the focus of her undivided attention.

“Tell me what happened. Why did you leave her?”

“Determined to hear a tragedy, then,” he remarked without humor. “Fine. How much has she told you?”

With a hint of a smile and a roll of her eyes, she joked, “You know Emma. Something along the lines of ‘There was a guy, I thought he was different, turns out he wasn’t.’”

“She’s always had a succinct way of getting to the heart of the matter,” he observed, staring at the wall and getting lost in the memory festering in his mind like a wound that wouldn’t heal. He wasn’t sure where to start. How do you relay the depths of heartache and broken trust that brought about the end of the happiest time of your life?

“It was fate when we met,” he murmured. “Of course, she said it was coincidence and no deeper meaning was at the root of it. We agreed to disagree. She was working a summer job at a dockside restaurant catering to tourists, not the rich kind summering there like me and my friends. It was a kitschy place complete with fake fish mounted on the walls and plastic sharks in their cocktails.”

“The kind of restaurant you normally would never have been caught dead in,” Elsa supplied.

“Too right. It was raining and I got turned around on my way to the yacht club. It had been a couple of years since I traveled to the US and honestly I was still having a hard time keeping to the right side of the road most days. I planned to duck in long enough to ask for directions when I saw her running out into the squall to fight down the patio umbrellas so they wouldn’t take off in the wind. She was wearing this awful Hawaiian shirt that was plastered to her like a second skin and I remember thinking she was the prettiest girl I’d ever seen.”

Her eyes drifted closed but she teased quietly, “Hawaiian shirts are a well known aphrodisiac.”

Laughing, he nodded. “I didn’t go a full day without seeing her after that. She led me on a merry chase. The competition was fierce, everyone looking for a summer romance to create memories they could take home as a souvenir and a woman like her was the object of many a wishful thought. It took me days to learn her name and weeks to get her number.”

“Poor thing. It must have been quite trying.”

“It was, thank you for noticing,” he said with mock sincerity. “Despite what you may think, or whatever barmy stories Robin may have shared with you, I had never pursued anyone before. When you’re young, filthy rich, and handsome, you don’t really have to work for anything. It usually falls in your lap. Everything changed when I met Emma.”

“Was it about the novelty then?”

“Maybe at first. Although I would be lying if I said attraction wasn’t the greater contributor. Even now, longing will punch me in the gut from time to time so I can’t say it wasn’t a factor then. It started as an amusement, quickly became a frustration, then morphed into a fascination I’m still not over. I’m not sure how long you’ve known Emma but she wasn’t always as open as she is now. She rarely smiled and when she did, it was usually a pretty imitation meant to appease or deflect someone. When I earned my first real one, I knew I was a goner.”

“How did you earn it?”

He hadn’t thought about it in a decade. Had made himself forget the beginning because it would inevitably lead him to the painful end. He shouldn’t have repressed it. The image of her looking up at him from the side of the road, dirt on her cheek and eyes flashing, was something to be cherished. “I let her change my flat tire.”

“How chivalrous of you…”

“I never said I was a catch. You asked for this story,” he reminded her. When Elsa flashed him an apologetic look, he continued. “It was the gateway to our first date. She didn’t think of it that way of course. I was strictly in the friend zone. But I have a tendency to grow on people and she was no different. I made her laugh and she made me feel. She was my best friend before she was anything else.”

“A best friend you wanted to see naked,” she accused with a snort.

“I’m sure you’ll find, in general, that is more common than you’d think.”

“Men,” she mumbled sleepily. “It doesn’t make any sense. If you were so close, how could you just leave?”

“I didn’t just leave.” He wished he didn’t have to skip over the middle and go straight to the end. For some reason, he wanted Elsa to know they had been happy. It didn’t last forever. Hell, it didn’t even last a second season, but it was more than a swift trip from lust to leaving. It was the deepest connection he ever experienced.

“We became serious more quickly than either of us could have imagined at the outset but we were still young. She wasn’t out of her teens and I had the emotional maturity of a toadstool. But I knew…I was determined she was the one. So I asked her to run away with me. To elope.”

“Wait a minute, so Walsh wasn’t the first guy to propose to her? I’m going to kill her. She never even hinted—“

“You’ll do no such thing.” He wasn’t surprised Emma never mentioned it, though he told everyone who would listen at the time. To his own detriment, as it turned out. After it ended, he doubted he had uttered her name once, much less given a detailed account of the rocky relationship. Until now. “It was a spontaneous thing. We were at a fair on one of the piers near her restaurant splitting a funnel cake and I knew I never wanted to be parted from her. So I tried to make sure I didn’t have to be.

“We agreed to meet after her shift the next night. I wanted to fly to Scotland but she didn’t have a passport. For that matter, I didn’t have a ring. It’s all a little surreal now. Seems like it happened in some cheesy movie I watched years ago rather than my own life. Only the movie hero wouldn’t have flaked at the last minute. It would have had a happy ending.”

Taking a deep breath, he prepared himself for the worst bit. “My father found out somehow. I’m sure one of my friends told someone who told someone else until it reached his ears. He flew across the country and demanded I break it off. Said men like us were free to find our pleasures where we wanted but carrying on the family name was a responsibility that should only be shared with someone who could understand the importance of it. Not orphan waitresses who were in it for the money.”

He expected anger or disappointment from her. Instead, she whispered sadly, “You listened to him.”

“No, not at first, and never about Emma being in it for the money. I’m an idiot but I’m not blind. It wasn’t until he said he regretted marrying my mother and seeing how miserable she was in our world I started to doubt. I didn’t want to doom Emma to a lifetime of cuts and mistreatment from people who thought she was beneath them. I loved her but I knew too well it wasn’t going to be enough, had seen it play out with my own parents. I wouldn’t have been able to protect her completely and I couldn’t condemn her to my mother’s fate. She deserved better. They both did.”

Almost shyly, Elsa asked, “Liam never talks about your mother. What was she like?”

“A lot like you, honestly. Even the same profession. She was beautiful and gentle with a lion heart who never stopped fighting for the right things. Liam shouldn’t make her a stranger to you and the girls. She is worthy of being remembered.”

They both fell silent and he was mortified to feel the prick of tears. She switched positions, moving to lean against his side, so he wrapped an arm around her slender shoulders and relaxed into the embrace. He had never held a woman like this, the closest thing being in the final days of his mother’s life when she was too sick to sit up by herself. Shaking off the memory, he was glad Elsa didn’t feel like she was running a fever but he could tell there was something off about her.

“It was Emma’s decision what she deserved, Killian. You should have talked to her.”

With an exasperated tone at odds with the comfortable way they were huddled together, he blurted out, “Thank you, Captain Obvious. I realized my mistake about ten minutes after it was too late. But I wasn’t thinking clearly then. I didn’t have the strength to face her. I knew my resolve would cave if she put up even a token resistance. I’ve always been a selfish man and I took the easy way out. I walked away without a word because it was less painful for me.”

He shuddered to think about it now, how he did the one thing he repeatedly promised Emma he would never do. “It was the worst kind of betrayal. I knew everything about her past, every broken promise and abandonment, yet I still walked away. The fact she will speak to me at all is a bloody miracle.”

“What are you going to do about it?”

“I’m going to wallow in misery, love her from afar and hope Walsh chokes on his own table legs.” It was a sound plan. He had already put it into motion and was getting exactly the results one would expect.

She chuckled softly then groaned. “Don’t make me laugh, it makes the nausea worse.”

“C’mon love, I have some experience with making women nauseous. I think some ginger ale and dry toast will have you feeling better in no time.”

—

“You truly think she said yes to such a bumbling proposal?”

Nursing his drink, Killian wondered why his friend looked so amused at his distress. He’d never been cruel in the past but the way he shook his head and smiled ruefully across the table carried an air of superiority out of place for the conversation. “I don’t know, Robin. But if not him, it will eventually be someone else.”

“They really did a number on you, mate.”

“In their defense, I don’t think I can take their relationship as a personal affront. Emma was dating him for a year before I came back into her life.”

“Not Emma and Walsh. Your sorry excuse for a father and ex-fiancée.” He stilled under Robin’s direct stare. They hadn’t talked about the situation beyond the barest of mentions since his friend arrived. He couldn’t say he was particularly interested in talking about it now either. Picking up his glass and gesturing toward him with a sense of bewilderment, Robin continued, “Where is the famous Killian Jones confidence? Why are you standing idly by? Emma is a woman worth fighting for but you refuse to even toss your hat in the ring.”

“You don’t know our history. I had my chance and I blew it.”

“Are you mad? I’ve seen the way she looks at you. Whatever the history, it is far from being buried and in the past. If you messed up that badly, this is your opportunity to make a brand new ending…a happy one this time. Don’t waste it. Apologize, tell her how you feel, show her you’ve changed. Faint heart never won fair lady.”

Rolling his eyes, he was about to correct his friend’s misconceptions when a figure stopped at their booth. The barely concealed dislike he felt oozing out of their visitor gave him an inkling of who it was before he looked over and saw the perfectly coiffed raven hair.

“Mr. Jones, a moment please?”

Sighing, he debated whether resistance would do any good. He had obviously lost his mojo and was at the mercy of the fates now. “Principal Mills, I’m in the middle of something. Perhaps we can have another tête-à-tête in your office tomorrow.”

Sliding into the booth next to Robin, who hurriedly shuffled to the side to avoid having a tightly wound woman in his lap, she said, “Now works better for me.”

“Then by all means, don’t let us inconvenience you,” Killian muttered under his breath. To his horror, Robin was grinning at the woman like she was a new shiny toy he couldn’t wait to play with. “Principal Mills, this is my friend Robin Locksley. Robin, meet Regina Mills, the bane of my existence.”

“Forgive him, Ms. Mills, he’s always been a surly drunk. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

With a slow smile, Regina made no effort to hide her thorough perusal of the man who shared the vinyl bench. Extending her hand gracefully, she spoke in a breathless voice dripping with raw interest. “Yes, I believe it may end up being a pleasure.”

Clearing his throat to break the tension, although he would be hard-pressed to say if he was more amused or disgusted by it, Killian watched them jump apart as if he had doused them with cold water. “What do you want?”

“I heard you’re building a website for Granny’s Diner.”

“You heard wrong. I only negotiated a deal to build a website. My brother is actually developing it. Have a nice night.”

“Killian, mind your manners.” Robin’s eyes were pleading with him to behave, probably in some misguided effort to impress their third wheel. Knowing he would regret it, he leaned back and waited for the other shoe to drop.

“Thank you. It’s refreshing to meet someone who doesn’t underestimate how appealing civility can be.” As she turned back to Killian, he was amazed at her ability to insult him while simultaneously flirting with Robin. “I want to hire you to redesign the school’s website. I have several ideas for increased functionality and a detailed vision for the overall look and feel. You can drop by tomorrow to get the information from Mrs. Nolan.”

Standing up to leave without waiting for his response, she added, “Whatever Mrs. Lucas is paying you, I’ll only agree to half since I’ve done most of the work already. Good evening.”

With that, she swept away regally.

“Where have you been hiding her? She’s enchanting,” Robin murmured after polishing off his drink. His eyes were still on the door as if hoping to catch one more glimpse of her.

“Hiding her? She probably crawls back to her lair when the sun comes out to avoid being turned to dust. Trust me, you don’t want that kind of trouble in your life.”

“She is exactly the kind of trouble I want.”

“Whatever, mate. It’s your funeral. Just remember to pack some garlic and maybe a crucifix or two on the first date.”

—

He took his time walking home that night. After they finished dinner, simple fare prepared by Granny Lucas herself with the help of Roland who had taken quite a shine to the older woman, there wasn’t much more to say. Robin seemed determined to ruin his life with the forceful brunette who had a knack for pissing him off and he was just as determined to be miserable over the unsettled state of affairs with Emma.

The most disturbing thought of all was perhaps it was already settled but he didn’t know. That there was nothing he could do but spend a lifetime regretting it.

Reaching the house, he stopped on the porch. He could hear the girls running around wild inside and while he had missed them this weekend as they went about their packed schedules and prior commitments, he was going to need a minute to regroup and put on a happy face. They didn’t deserve the brunt of his gloom and doom attitude.

“Killian.”

Her voice was quiet and so longed for that at first he thought he imagined it. It wasn’t until he saw her hesitate on the step he allowed himself to believe she was actually there. “I’m glad you’re here, love. I’ve been worried about you.”

It was the truth, although not the whole truth. He was as worried about her answer to the question hanging over his head like a knife.

“I’d like to…that is, I’ve been thinking.”

She was agitated. He could tell by the halting meter of her words and how she hadn’t met his eyes once since she arrived. His gut twisted in preparation for hearing the unwelcome news she would be lost to him forever. “Nothing wrong with that, Emma. It would seem you have a lot to consider.”

“Right. Can I just…” Her voice trailed off and she froze in front of him, her entire body tense. He wondered if it was as hard for her to tell him as it was for him to hear it. Somehow, he doubted it.

“It’s fine, love. Say whatever you need to say.”

She gave a huff of frustration and he thought he heard her mutter something and the next thing he knew, she grabbed the collar of his jacket and pulled him to her. Before he could draw a breath, and heaven knew he needed one because he was pretty sure shock knocked all the air out of his lungs, her lips were on his and then he moved on pure instinct.

He had dreamed of this moment for ten years. At times he wasn’t sure if it was a fantasy or a haunting. The memory of her body against his, the way her fingers would comb through his hair, the rush of emotion that flooded him when she looked at him with desire nearly matching his own, it was painful to endure knowing he would never experience it again.

But to experience it again. Well, it was a different kind of pain. The piercing combination of love and lust threatened to make his knees buckle. Wrapping her tightly in his embrace, his right hand wound in her hair and his left moving to cradle her face, he kissed her with the pent-up emotion of a man who had been banished from the promised land only to be allowed a brief return.

Robin was right, only an idiot would waste this opportunity.

The kiss deepened and he advanced them slowly until her back pressed against the wall of the porch. He couldn’t get enough of her. His lips caressing hers in a way achingly familiar and yet excitingly different. The years had added experience for them both but the underlying emotion was the same as always. Her hands were in his hair, a little moan he felt before he heard it escaping her mouth.

Without realizing what he was doing, his hand drifted down her leg, gently lifting it against his hip and rocking into a closer position. Blood thundered in his ears and he was fairly certain his heart was going to explode in his chest. In all honesty, that wasn’t the only thing on the verge of exploding.

Suddenly, the high-pitched giggle of one of the girls broke through the night and burst the heated bubble surrounding them. With a shaky breath, Killian pulled away and rested his forehead against hers. His hand still held her leg in place against him, the fingers of his other tracing the silky skin of her cheek. “I’m not complaining, love, but what are you doing?”

“Thinking,” she murmured, her hands dropping to his shoulders and lowering her leg to the ground but otherwise remaining pinned against him. She watched him with hungry eyes and he knew this was everything he wanted in life. He would have to tread carefully or risk losing her again. Not that he was entirely sure he had her now.

Smiling softly, he pushed a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “An important woman like you must have many things on her mind. Perhaps it would help if you thought about them some more.”

He kissed her tenderly, allowing himself to savor the feeling of being close to her. Unhurriedly, he brushed his lips across her forehead and pulled her to him in an embrace somehow more intimate than the near ravishing that had just occurred. Her head fit perfectly under his chin, her arms wrapped securely around his waist as if she too was afraid of falling.

“Why did you have to come back? I was happy. I could have been happy.”

“Darling, I’m sorry. For so many things. I would leave tomorrow if you asked me to…I’d do anything for you. I know I don’t have any right to comment on your life but despite my admittedly vested interest in the situation, I only want your happiness. You won’t find it with Walsh.”

“I could have. You ruined it.”

He grinned into her hair at her stubbornness. He loved how the fighter in her was never dampened, never repressed. “Blame me all you want as long as you tell him no.”

She pulled away and swallowed hard, clearly trying to come to terms with what happened between them and visibly retreating behind her walls.“I already have. He wants me to take some time to reconsider.”

“Trust your instincts, love. They are impeccable.”

“He’s a good man, Killian. He would never hurt me. He would make sure Henry and I have a good home. It should be enough.” Her voice filled with frustration and maybe some anger. Knowing her like he did, he knew she was regretting the impulsive act that led to this conversation.

“It won’t be. The emptiness of a mismatched relationship will consume you until you don’t recognize your own reflection. Don’t do that to yourself, Emma.”

“We’re taking a break. We’re going to meet at Thanksgiving and talk it out. So this,” she said gesturing between them with a hand that shook, “whatever this was, can’t happen again. I’m sorry I gave into the impulse. I’m not sure what came over me. It was a one time thing, got it?”

It scared him how quickly she was slipping away but a pesky hope rooted in him and he refused to cede the ground he had won. He needed to earn her trust and her love. It wouldn’t be easy but the idea invigorated him. “Whatever your heart desires but I’m not going anywhere. When I win your heart back Emma, and I will win it, it won’t be because of any trickery. It will be because you want me in your life as badly as I want you in mine.”

His hat was officially in the ring and nothing was going to stop him.



[blvejeanbaby]

Time | Hwang Hyunjin

Pairing: Hyunjin x Itzy!reader (not really explicitly mentioned) Word Count: 2324 Prompt: Hyunjin is super excited to jump right into a relationship while reader just wants to take it slow & get to know him first // based on Sometimes by Britney Spears

“Okay, gotta go.” You grabbed your jacket off the back of the couch and hung it around your shoulders, knowing it would be too hot in the stifling summer heat but you would need it at night. “I don’t know what time I’ll be back,” you told your roommate, Yeji. “Oh, where are you going?” Chaeryeong asked, sitting next to Yeji. Her eyes were starry as always. If there was an image attached to ‘uwu’ it would be Chaeryeong’s face. “She’s meeting her new boyfriend,” Yeji said in a teasing voice, before you could answer. “He’s not my boyfriend,” you said, shaking your head. “Not yet.” “She wants him to be,” Yeji said. This was a conversation you had had many times with her already, so instead of going in against her, you only sighed and said: “I’m going now. Bye.” You waved at Chaeryeong, gave Yeji a death glare as she laughed and left the apartment.

You were set to meet Hyunjin at your shared favourite coffee shop but you walked into him at the corner of the street and he offered to grab ice cream instead, considering the heat. “Sure,” you said. As you walked, he chatted about some project he was finishing up on and you nodded along, taking more time to stare at him. Sometimes you couldn’t believe that Hyunjin, who was possibly the prettiest, most handsome boy in the entirety of Seoul - yes, you were big on hyperboles - would spend his time with you. Although you didn’t think you were ugly, there were far prettier girls out there who seemed to be more like Hyunjin’s type personality-wise. In all honesty, you weren’t sure he had a type, exactly. Yeji, who knew him a lot longer and better than you did, had said he didn’t have a physical type and that his type personality-wise was someone thoughtful who could listen well and was just in general fun to be around. Hyunjin had never had a girlfriend before, nothing serious at least, so you couldn’t say if what Yeji told you was true. You had carefully let yourself wonder about if you met the requirements to be his type. You gave some good advice sometimes and tried to listen to your friends’ worries well. You guessed that could be described as thoughtful too. You hoped you were fun to be around. It is what you liked about being around Hyunjin; he made every situation a little bit brighter. There was something else about him too, something that made you wonder if this was really what you wanted. You could overlook the whole handsome heartthrob aesthetic he had going on, considering you now thought you could judge his personality quite well and he seemed to be the kind of guy you’d easily fall for - in fact, you were still trying to convince yourself you weren’t actually in love with the boy already. But it was just his... eagerness? “You spilled.” Hyunjin pointed at something on your face. “Spilled?” The word didn’t quite connect, your mind still on your doubts about this thing you had with him. “I’ll get it for you.” He grabbed a napkin off the table and leaned over it, using the tip of the napkin to clean a spot right above your lip where you had spilled ice cream. He stayed leaned over the table a lot longer than necessary, eyes locked on yours. You could feel his breath on your face and suddenly you felt nervous, like you were about to jump out of your own skin. “Thank you,” you said softly as he finally leaned back, allowing you to breathe again.

It was later that day when you walked along the river, your jacket slung around your shoulders, his hand swinging in between you two, brushing yours every once in a while as if wanting to grab your hand. But you kept pulling away. As you walked, he told you stories about his childhood, about his friends - “It’s so fun to annoy Minho hyung! He really hates it when I ruffle his hair so it’s so easy to get him going. And then Jisung has to step in and prevent him from killing me, it’s so funny-” - and about his plans for his upcoming break. “Do you have anything planned for that time period?” “I think I might visit family for a bit,” you said, thinking of Yeji. She would be returning to her hometown, where Hyunjin was also from. You thought perhaps you could ask her if you were welcome to stay with her parents for a few days, so you could see Hyunjin. But that was crazy. “But you’re not going overseas?” “I don’t think so,” Hyunjin said. “Shall we sit down for a bit?” He gestured at the riverside. The bank was a high way up from the water, allowing you both to swing your legs over the side and sit at the water’s edge, staring out over the setting sun. It was truly a beautiful sight, but you were too preoccupied with staring at your feet. The toes of Hyunjin’s boots were touching yours and you could feel him creeping ever so close to you. Nervous sparks shot from your toes up to your lips and with a shiver you scooted away a little. Was that hurt you saw in Hyunjin’s eyes? “Y/N, I have to tell you something,” he said. He took a deep breath and you were sure he was going to tell you he didn’t want to hang out with you anymore, that he didn’t think this was going to work out. “I’m in love with you.” You gasped. There really was no better or more appropriate reaction to a sudden confession of love like that. And honestly, you hadn’t thought you would experience it like this. It was movie-like...? Even in your fantasies you had always imagined the magical moment would come in a somewhat unmagical situation, like while you’re doing the washing up or cleaning up some drunk frat boy’s puke after a party. It wasn’t meant to happen like this. Maybe Hyunjin didn’t get the message, because he was leaning closer and closer to you, until there was only a slight gap between your lips. If this had been a cheesy drama you would have pushed him so far away from you, that he would fall into the water. But because this was real life, or something that looked suspiciously like it, you jumped up and said: “I forgot something. I’ll call you. Bye,” and ran away.

“Y/N, come on!” It was Yeji, standing at the door, knocking on it as if she was only minutes away from breaking it down. You had taken the liberty to lock the bathroom door for the first ever time since living with her and she was not having it. “I swear to God I’m going to use whatever spy knowledge I have to break this door open. If you ever want some privacy in that shower again, I suggest you open the door now.” Knowing her, she would actually do it. With a sigh you unlocked the door, going quickly back to sitting in the dry shower. “I don’t want to talk,” you said, pulling your knees up and wrapping your arms around them. “I already know about what happened, so you’d better just listen,” Yeji said. “How do you know what happened?” You looked up, frowning. “Trainee buddies keep in touch.” She waved her phone in front of you, just as it lit up with a text message from Hyunjin. With a groan you put your head back on your knees, closing your eyes. “Allow me to tell you something, baby girl. A little story of Hwang Hyunjin.” Yeji sat down opposite you in the shower, even though it was really not large enough to accommodate two full-grown adults. “Hyunjin doesn’t have a filter. He blurts out everything that comes to mind, he never thinks twice about the way his words impact other people unless it might be hurtful. He never thought that saying he loves you would hurt you.” She shrugged - you could hear her knocking over a shampoo bottle in the process. “Oops. Anyway, believe me when I say that Hyunjin never meant to scare you away. He’s really upset with himself and he wonders what he did wrong. He wants to learn from whatever mistake he made. And because you won’t return his calls - God knows where your phone is - he told me to tell you he wants to meet up again. On your terms.” “O-on my terms?” You looked up slightly and when you saw Yeji’s compassionate expression and encouraging nod, you sighed and rested your chin on top of your knees. “Fine. Text him back and ask him to come by.” “I’ll make myself scarce,” Yeji said, giving you a pat on the head as if you were a cat and then proceeding to wiggle herself out of the shower, already texting Hyunjin.

It was only an hour later that Hyunjin stood on the threshold. You opened the door to a tall boy who was supposed to be an adult human but looked like a kicked little puppy. He wasn’t carrying flowers or chocolates, but you were just as happy to see a tub of ice cream in his hands, of the same flavour that you had in the salon earlier that day. “I know it’s bad for the diet to eat ice cream twice in a day but I figured...” You would never find out what he had figured because you wordlessly took the ice cream, set it aside, pulled Hyunjin inside and wrapped your arms around his torso. There was a moment of silence and stiffness of Hyunjin’s end, when he finally relaxed and wrapped his arms around you. The notable height difference made you feel comfortable and safe and you barely noticed when you tightened your hold around him. When finally you let go, Hyunjin said: “I’m sorry if I was out of line earlier today.” “It’s okay,” you said. Hyunjin went into the living room as you instructed, while you went to grab two spoons so you could eat right out of the tub. When you came into the living room, you were glad to see that Yeji had vacated it. She was probably up in her room, keeping as quiet as possible so she could listen in on your conversation and tell your friends every single detail. You were fine with it. “There you go.” You handed Hyunjin a spoon and sat down next to him - he had cracked open the tub and was ready to dive into it. He had a light blush on his cheeks that you probably mimicked. “You weren’t out of line.” “I wasn’t?” It seemed to be a massive relief to him, seeing you shake your head. The tension visibly left his body. “Then why did you run away?” You wanted to hide away from this conversation, hide away from his words and your previous actions. You were embarrassed about the way you reacted. “That was silly,” you forced out. “I shouldn’t’ve. I should’ve stayed and said what I was thinking.” “And what were you thinking?” Hyunjin said, softly, as not to press you too hard. You shoveled ice cream into your mouth to delay the answer, but you couldn’t delay it forever. “I guess I’m just... scared? I mean...” You shrugged, wanting desperately to shove more ice cream into your mouth. But it was better to just rip off the band-aid like this. “I’m not scared of you - well, maybe a little bit - I’m more so scared of what that means.” “What what means?” “You being in love with me,” you said, very softly, almost like a whisper. “It means...” Hyunjin seemed to be at a loss for words now too. “It means I can’t stop thinking about you, even when we’re not together. And when we are I just keep thinking about the next time I’ll see you. I liked you before I even knew you, Y/N, but now I know that every word Yeji told me about you was the truth. You’re beautiful and thoughtful and sweet. You’re the type of person that helps the elderly cross the road and that volunteers at homeless shelters. You inspire me.” “I’m not,” you said. “Not any of those things you said.” “Is that what you’re afraid of?” Hyunjin said, putting his spoon down now. Oh, it was that serious? you thought. Serious enough to put your spoon down? “That I’m thinking these things of you?” “Maybe?” You shrugged. “I don’t know, Hyunjin. I’m so sorry.” You set your spoon down now too. “I want to believe that everything you say is right and... It’s not that I don’t want to be with you or that I don’t feel happy that you feel that way for me, because it’s sort of the way I feel, I think? I mean... Every time I’m near you I just want to hold you and whenever I’m away from you I want to talk to you. I don’t ever want to be anywhere too far away from you. But... I think maybe it’s too fast?” “Too fast?” Hyunjin repeated, seemingly in a daze. You nodded. “I understand.” “You do?” Now it was your turn to feel relieved. He nodded. “I should have respected you more and understood that you wanted to take these things slowly.” “You respect me enough.” You both watched, Hyunjin motionlessly, as you slowly reached out, grabbing his hand in yours. His hand was a little calloused, the way boys’ hands always are. And your hand was so small compared to his. You smiled, looking up at Hyunjin. “All I need is time.” “And I will give you as much time as you need.”

[shutupandshipit]

Sharpen Your Blades - Ch.10

Summary: “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

The thinning of Aizawa’s patience was evident in the twitching of his brow. “If you stop asking questions, maybe I could finish explaining.

”With a huff and roll of his eyes, Katsuki glanced away from their coach.

“City Hall and the SC want us to give them more variety. We are a team solely made up of single skaters. Every year, we dominate the rankings for single skate while Shinketsu dominates the pairs, so this year both cities are being required to split their skaters evenly between singles and pairs with at least one pair coming from out top five.” There was a collective intake of breath, but no one commented, choosing instead to remain silent. “Unfortunately, for us, it’s a lot easier to switch from pairs to singles. With our male to female ratio, alpha/beta/omega ratio, and those of you actually experienced with pair skating, we’re at a disadvantage. So, I’ve decided to choose your partners for you.”

…..

Or where Katsuki and Izuku are forced to be partners so they can continue to compete, but the blood in the water may be thicker than anyone realized.

Pairing: Bakudeku

Rating: T

Chapter: 10/20

Previously <- Chapter 9: Refills

Chapter 11: Solo -> Next

Chapter 10: Alpha Wanted

Katsuki skidded to a stop, chest heaving as he leaned against the wall. Ever since he’d broken off his partnership with Izuku, he’d been pushing himself to the very edge of his abilities and sometimes further. When no one was around, when he was completely alone on the ice, he would sometimes go until he was forcing himself not to puke as his body heaved. Sometimes he did puke, and he would spend thirty minutes cleaning up the mess before trudging home.

He knew he wasn’t taking the end of their partnership well, but that didn’t mean he was going to stop running himself into the ground.

Lifting his head, his eyes met Izuku’s across the ice.

Izuku was huddled in the middle of the bleachers, his new partner seated at his side and the rest of the alphas on the team that were in their age group surrounding him. They chattered on and on, looking to Izuku for approval, but even when he just smiled nervously at them, they continued on as if he’d given an actual answer.

Anger seethed in Katsuki's chest. He hated it, hated seeing him surrounded by alphas all grinning and preening like a flock of ugly peacocks. Hated the uncomfortable smile that Izuku always wore nowadays. Hated glancing over to check on him and already finding Izuku’s eyes on him.

Most of all, he hated the way the other alphas had treated Izuku like he was a prize to be won as soon as they were no longer a pair anymore. Hated the way they treated him like he was suddenly fair game.

Katsuki shouldn’t have been surprised. He’d known they’d just been waiting for the right moment, waiting for him to fuck up, waiting for him to let Izuku just the barest inch out of his reach. As soon as they’d presented, Izuku had become coveted among the alphas. The rare male omega. Somehow, it made him ten times more desirable to the others on the team. As if his secondary gender erased everything they’d never liked about him.

When Katsuki had been his partner, the others hadn’t dared to make the attempt to court him. They’d rightly assumed that he’d had fully intended to court Izuku, but he’d been planning on beginning their courtship once they were at least in high school. Just his presence and scent on Izuku had marked him as off limits, and that had been enough to begin with.

Katsuki scowled, watching Izuku’s cheeks grow red and his green eyes drop, and then as he startled back away from a touch to his knee. Stubbornly, he turned and ignored the quick glance back up at him. He wasn’t Izuku’s partner, wasn’t going to be his mate, wasn’t anything to him anymore.

…..

Katsuki groaned out his frustration, dragging his hands down his face as Izuku hit the ice for the tenth time that night. Even during team practice, Izuku hadn’t been able to land a single jump. The concentration on his face was severe, but something was clearly taking up all of the space in that curly head of his. “What the fuck is going on, Deku? You haven’t flubbed this many jumps since we were fucking five. What gives?” Katsuki asked, gliding over to Izuku and jerking him back to his feet.

Izuku’s jaw worked back and forth, brow furrowed and eyes downcast. “I’ve just… got something on my mind. I don’t want to talk about it.” His tone was low and dark, and he pushed away towards the wall as he rubbed at his backside. Sliding on his guards, he stepped off the ice.

If Katsuki hadn’t been so taken aback by the warning note in Izuku’s voice, it wouldn’t have taken him so long to realize his partner was pulling off his skates. “What are you doing? We’ve still got another hour before the janitors kick us out. We’re not done yet.”

Izuku didn’t lift his head as he pulled his shower bag from his duffle, something he only ever brought when he had somewhere else to be after practice. The tops of his ears were blush red and his voice was soft and cautious when he glanced up to say, “I, uh, have to get ready…”

“For?” Katsuki prompted irately.

“A date.”

Katsuki’s heart stuttered to a stop in his chest. His alpha whined pitifully, and he just barely managed to keep the sound in. “Whatever,” he muttered instead, grabbing his phone and headphones from the wall before pushing back out to center ice. He stood there pretending to scroll through his music until he heard the double doors slam closed.

Turning back to the benches, Katsuki slipped on his guards and headed for his bag. Inside, he’d nestled the softest faux fur lined blanket that one of his student’s mothers had gifted him. ‘You young alphas never think of nesting materials for that special someone in your life,’ she’d told him as she’d pushed it into his arms. She’d been right, of course, but only because Katsuki had thought it was too early to be thinking about nesting. Nesting materials implied Katsuki wanted to share Izuku’s heat with him, and while that was certainly the case, he didn’t want to push too hard. Izuku didn’t even know that Katsuki was trying to court him yet.

Still, he’d been grateful and even considered offering the gift face to face, but now…

‘Gift to omega. Maybe… Maybe…’ Even his alpha was at a loss with the situation. Still, they both came to the same agreement. ‘Give omega gift. Cannot hurt. Alpha is only one courting omega. Give gift. Maybe make things better.’

Lifting the tissue paper covered blanket from his bag, he nestled it beneath all of Izuku’s other things and just hoped the omega would be tot out of it to notice it right away.

He sat down heavily on the bench between their bags, and stripped off his skates. Once he’d cleaned them, and given Izuku’s the same treatment, he shouldered his bag and left.

…..

“Deku?” Uraraka’s voice was sleepy and confused when she answered his call.

Pulling his phone away from his ear, he checked the time. 23:48 stared accusingly up at him, and he took a page from Katsuki’s book to quietly curse under his breath. “I’m sorry, Chako, I didn’t realize how late it was. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” Even to his own ears, his voice didn’t sound right, and he could hear when the red flag shot up for her as she started to rustle around on the other end.

She yawned. “No, no, it’s fine. I wasn’t really sleeping at all. What’s up?” she lied, all chipper brightness. After a moment, she added, “How was the date?”

He didn’t answer right away, and when he did, it sounded like a flat lie. His voice broke as he said, “It was fine.”

“Deku?”

The tears were on his cheeks in an instant, cutting hot tracks across his cold skin.

The date hadn’t been fine. Well, from an outside perspective, he was sure it appeared as if things had gone swimmingly. The alpha had been perfectly civil and attentive, asking him questions about himself and more in depth questions about the topics he was interested in. He asked all the right questions too and some funny ones that made Izuku snort. What was he looking for in an alpha? How quickly was he expecting the relationship to progress? Did he want pups one day? Did he prefer cats or dogs or ferrets? What were his goals in life? What was his favorite flavor of ice cream? What was his favorite flower? Did he expect them to share their cycles together right away? If he had pups one day, what did he want to name them?

At first, he’d enjoyed his time with the man. Enjoyed looking at him. Enjoyed listening to him. Enjoyed, for the most part, scenting him on the air. Everything had been going just fine, but with each question Izuku had answered, the sick twist of betrayal had grown in his belly. With each question he answered that made the alpha’s scent sour with either disappointment or irritation, Izuku had felt the uneasy anxious energy nestled right beside his omega squirm restlessly.

There had been a moment when he realized he had no longer been answering as honestly as before, when he was tailoring his answers to specifically please the alpha. There had been a desperation in his body that told him he needed to secure this alpha for his heat. If he didn’t, then his next heat would be the most agonizing he’d ever had. That terrified him, but also made him angry.

Then the man had said, “I’ll be honest here, if this ever progressed to the point that we had pups, I would want you to stop competing so we could focus on our family. You seem to really enjoy skating-” He didn’t just ‘enjoy’ figure skating, he loved it. It was his life blood. If that was taken from him… “-but once you had a pup, that would all change. I just know it. And you wouldn’t want to risk getting hurt again. Your hips and legs need to be strong to carry, you know.”

That had solidified his resolve to end things before they even got started. No amount of fear was worth giving up the thing he loved most.

Izuku had smiled pleasantly even as that oh so familiar black tar had filled his chest and drowned his omega. “I appreciate your honesty.” Standing, he’d held out a hand even as confusion and anger began to morph that alpha’s handsome face. Even as his instincts told him to do something to make that look go away. Even as his omega urged him to fix things before it was too late.

Despite that, relief had flooded his body. Clutching his gloves in his hand, he hadn’t been able to stop from thinking of the alpha who’d taken so much care to get the size perfect and wishing he knew who they were. Wishing they were Katsuki. Then his omega had reminded him of the nesting blanket he’d found at the bottom of his bag, and knew that the date had been the worst idea his friends could have come up with.

“So, I’ll be honest as well. This isn’t going to work out. I accepted our offer because I need an alpha to spend my next heat with. This is what my friends and doctors suggested, but I’ll never be able to give you what you want if that’s me being a stay at home omega.”

The alpha had stared at his hand. The anger smoothed away as he glanced down to the hand holding the gloves. “I think there’s something else too. You don’t have to take a roundabout way to say you have someone else in mind.” After a long moment, he’d stood and shaken Izuku’s hand. “They’re a lucky alpha, whoever they are. Thanks for the conversation. It was nice. Friends?”

On the way home, he’d closed the accounts Uraraka and the other omegas had set up for him and deleted the dating and heat aid apps they’d downloaded to his device.

He relayed the whole story to Uraraka in gruesome detail, but he wasn’t sure how much was understandable through his sobbing.

Several hiccuping sobs later, Uraraka sighed. “Take a shower, Deku. I’m going to get some things, and then I’m coming over. No arguments. See you in thirty, okay?” Her voice was gentle, soft, and Izuku caved.

Hanging up, he focused on her suggestion and thanked the world she was his best friend. He was far more thankful for her suggestion when he caught the scent of the alpha still on his close, cedar and cinnamon. Not a bad scent by any means, but he still ripped his clothes off and stuffed them at the bottom of the washing machine.

He couldn’t tell if the scent had stuck to his skin or hair, but he hated the mere thought. He scrubbed until his scalp tingled and his skin was pink. The water ran cold over his head. When he got out, he dressed in his baggiest comfort clothes. An oversized sweater that had mistakenly been left in his locker at the rink several years prior and his high school gym sweats. Both had holes along seams and fraying cuffs, but they were warm and large. When he wore them, he felt loved and safe.

Pulling the nesting blanket from his bed where he’d spread it out to air out, he huddled beneath it on the couch with his face pressed into a corner of the cushions.

Uraraka’s arrival was signaled by the turning of her spare key in the lock. Still, he didn’t move, and only knew she’d seen him when she sighed heavily. For several long minutes, she shuffled around the kitchen. Drawers were opened and closed. Glasses clacked against each other. Silverware tinkled against the counter tops. All sounds found their way to the coffee table eventually, and then the couch by Izuku’s head dipped with her weight.

“This is a really nice nesting blanket. Where did you get it?” she asked quietly, fingers curling in the few locks of hair that stuck out from beneath the edge of the blanket.

Izuku allowed his head to be lifted into her lap, and pressed forward into the soft yet firm warmth of her stomach. “Was left in my bag. Don’t know who it's from.”

Uraraka stayed quiet, pushing back the blanket to run her fingers through his hair. Eventually, she said, “It smells like Bakugou.”

He stiffened. “Don’t.”

Her hand paused. “Don’t what?”

Izuku pulled away from her, huddling against the opposite side of the couch. “Don’t say stuff like that,” he whispered tiredly and leaned his cheek against the arm of the couch, “You know how I feel about him. Don’t give me false hope like that. It’s not worth the heartache at the end of it all.”

“I don’t know how false it is.” Turning to face him completely, Izuku could see just how fierce her expression was out of the corner of his eye. “This is the second thing that’s turned up in your bag smelling like him. He’s given you three things before this, that headband, his gloves and his hat. Is it really that far out of the realm of possibility?”

“Yes, Chako, it is!” Izuku snapped, voice wobbly with tears, “Kaccahn would never want someone as useless as me. Someone who dragged us down and then got hurt. He deserved better than me. I’m just lucky he’s willing to skate with me again.”

Uraraka’s face twisted as if there were more she wanted to say. In the end, she just asked, “Isn’t he the reason the date didn’t go well?” Izuku’s eyes flickered to her, and he was crying all over again. “Oh sweetie, come here.” She opened her arms, and he crawled into them, allowing himself to be held tight.

[ohmylove--mydarling]

It’s true what they say about your early-to-mid 20s. This particular span of ten blissful, wanton years is the only time in your entire life where you will ever feel truly invincible. And yes, you absolutely better enjoy it while it lasts. Lithe-bodied, hopeful, capable of both pounding an entire handle of rail vodka all while making it to your 8 am sociology class the next day, they’re a little like your teen years, with one prized difference. Your early-to-mid 20s are blessed with the seemingly novel, universe-bending element of freedom.

And freedom doesn’t simply mean the ability to make stupid decisions without the fear of getting grounded. It also means the freedom to live in an idyllic sort of vacuum, where you’re surrounded by friends – if we’re being honest, the family you get to choose – and cradled in this serene philosophy, this security blanket of an idea that hangs in the air but is never outwardly or directly expressed, that this, all of this, will last forever. That these people will always be there, they will always be around, floating with you in this bubble, as free and easily accessible as a coatrack or your neighbor’s WiFi. Always holding your beer, always holding your hair back (while you puke, or maybe while you cry), always holding your hand. Always at the very least in the peripheral, if not the forefront, of your vision.

During these years you know everything, and yet somehow you know nothing at all.

***

Like most of the sorority sisters I grew close with – and as is probably true with anyone else who pledged a very tiny chapter at an equally tiny school – I don’t remember much about how I met Taylor beyond the first night she “rushed.” Rush is an interesting social phenomenon, for multiple reasons. Picture a gaggle of young college-aged women who typically spend every waking hour of their day primping and glossing and adjusting for the sole purpose of the male gaze. Except this time, their attention is entirely drawn to a smaller group of girls (not that much smaller of a group, if we’re lucky this semester) that they want to impress instead. A frenzy of compliments and genuine interest, a dormant volcano of estrogen and hot girl energy and reciprocation, madly overflowing in a span of two hours over something as innocuous as an ice cream social or tie-dying a pile of crewneck t-shirts (I think we did the “hippie” recruitment theme every other semester). It is one of the very best parts of what is an often problematic-at-best Greek culture, and this rush was no different.

I’m not sure what my first impression of Taylor was, other than that we obviously had the same first name, and oh yeah, she was beautiful– effortlessly pretty but not the least intimidating. I could approach her and talk to her and not feel like a complete toad. She was a little soft-spoken, incredibly polite. I think she wore navy blue. And an aura of genuine kindness seemed to radiate from her with the soft glow of candlelight.

After rush ended and Taylor chose to join our ranks, where she belonged, it felt like she had been in my life from the very beginning. And, though this idea was never spoken, it felt like she would never leave.

***

In a sorority, there is sometimes a tendency, however unintentional, to categorize your sisters, and to turn to certain ones for different needs at different times. There’s the sister you study with, the sister you go on your morning run with, the sister(s) you are always down to party with. There’s the sister who makes amazing grilled cheese, the sister whose dorm is the only place you’ll binge-watch Supernatural. When you’re riding the waves of a breakup, you got mad options: There’s the sister who brushes your hair as you ugly-cry and choke on your own snot, the sister who pledges to hook you up with her brother’s hot friend the moment you’re ready for a rebound, the “dump him sis” sister who yanks your phone out of your hand in the middle of what is probably a very unwise text and threatens to stab him with her eyebrow razor if he so much as looks at you again, the sister who makes you forget the whole thing ever happened, that it ever even mattered.

There’s the maid of honor sister, the future fun wine-aunt sister, the sister you have on speed-dial even though speed-dial isn’t a thing anymore. There are the sisters who teach you how to do winged liner, how to hide a hickey with coral lipstick and concealer, how to chant, how to chug, how to memorize the Greek alphabet and the …numbers (at least for the ones who are most definitely going to ask). There are the sisters whose weddings you bawl at, whose babies you hold and immediately love as an extension of the incredible mother who brought them into this world.

And there are the sisters who teach you grace and humility, strength and resilience, kindness and self-love. The sisters who changed your life for the better the moment they put on your letters, the sisters who hand you the mirror and force you to see yourself just as they see you.

The thing about Taylor was that she was all of these. The whole package. Everything good, all in one.

***

Though our friendship was at its strongest during my college and immediate post-college years, Taylor remained a calming, grounding presence in my life. She married an incredible man who loved her for all the reasons we did and plenty more, and I went to her wedding and cried. She got a job as a nurse at the local hospice, a profession she seemed put on this earth to do. I could picture Taylor in her element there, literally surrounded by an entire ocean of grief, serving as an island of hope, a beacon of light and love for those who so desperately needed all those things, the things she provided us without question even when our lives were comfortable. Soon after – and this thought still makes something in my throat ache – she brought life into this world, a beautiful daughter with both her mother’s eyes and her genuine love and gratitude for life, a joyful curiosity coloring everything she did.

Taylor’s life, we knew, was finally the one she had always deserved.

***

I won’t, and can’t anyway, get into the details of Taylor’s passing. I can say that nothing about it was expected and literally every detail about it is horrific. Personally, it feels like a robbery, like something was taken from me; but on a grander scale, on a scale that actually matters, it is simply heartbreak. Riding the waves of grief not only for my own loss, but for a husband, a child, a family, a community whose lives were upended and whose hearts were crushed by something that simply should not have happened in a universe where they say justice and kindness exist.

Frankly, this grief is unlike any other I have experienced. It has a way of blanketing everything around me, like mosquito netting. It is as thick and choking as a cloud of black smoke, permeating my clothes, filling my lungs, making it impossible to see, so all I can do is desperately cling to whatever gives me the slightest amount of peace, no matter how fleeting. As someone who has always struggled with my faith (and moments like these certainly do not help), I try to remember Taylor’s. It brought her comfort and strength, the belief that God loves everyone so naturally she was going to love everyone, too. And all I can hope is that this belief of hers, this faith, manifested in her final moments. That there was a light, a voice, a presence, something there that reminded her that she was loved. That we knew she loved us, that her family will never be alone, that we will desperately miss her. That her legacy is as wide and expansive as all the oceans.

Her funeral is in a few days. Her funeral, a concept still as foreign as my own.

***

At this point it’s probably clear, but the things I want people to remember the most about Taylor are, quite simply, her kindness and her intrinsic ability to love. She was kind without questioning. She loved without strings or conditions, tirelessly and endlessly. At a time when an icy, impenetrable layer of cynicism seemed to blanket so many of our hearts – including my own – Taylor managed to crack it a little, to let just enough of her light and her warmth in to make a change.

I teased her often – probably too often –  for her unbreakable habit of bringing home literally any stray cat she ever found (and then naming it something either really cute or painfully dumb, like “Moe” or “Cheese”). But even as someone who unapologetically hates cats, and more honestly as someone who spent most of her 20s thinking that if I hardened my exterior and never let love in I was somehow protecting everything it surrounded, I viewed this habit through a secret lens of adoration. I adored Taylor’s heart. I hoped to absorb some of it, its ability to love everything, to find beauty in the darkest and loneliest spaces and to also force people to see it and feel it for themselves.

I felt Taylor was going to be around forever. It was a selfish thought. I hadn’t physically seen her in over a year (there was a pandemic and she was a nurse and I was subsumed by my own now meaningless world). I am filled with an omnipresent regret that I have no control over. I miss her so much my heart feels swollen and achy with a pining, a real grief.

There is no happy ending to this, no concise, comfortable, heartwarming way to wrap this all up in a pretty package, though Taylor was the type to want everything to have a good ending. So instead I cling to the memories, the photographs. Our banquets, homecoming, Lana del Rey, cherry blossoms. The way she rapped that entire A$AP Ferg verse one night. The way she looked in her wedding gown. The way she talked about charity and good deeds. The way she talked about God. Her love, no matter what transgression I made or no matter if I failed to give it back. I hope to love harder now, and if I can, it’s because Taylor taught me how.

I love you, Taylor. DZLAM.

[pips-fics]

Ask: Could you do one where Changbin gets a stomach bug and nearly pukes on the floor and he doesn't want to be alone so he gets stuck with the Aussie Line.

——

changbin hadn’t slept so well in a long time.  he hadn’t woken up feeling so poorly in longer.  his stomach ached like some animal was eating it from the inside out.

naturally, he tried to go back to sleep.

naturally, that didn’t work in the slightest.

for a brief time he drifted in and out of a light sleep, but that might be a bit of a stretch.  the entire time he was painfully - quite literally, painfully aware that his stomach was not going to feel better any time soon.  instead, it seemed to be getting worse by the second.

regardless, he would have continued trying and failing to sleep for a long time, except that he seemed to have accidentally made some sort of pitiful noise.

“hm?  binnie-hyung?”  changbin turned his head slightly and was more shocked than he probably should have been to see felix draped over the bunk above his.  “you okay?”

“yeah, just, uh- just- i dunno.  ‘m fine.  tired.”  changbin carded a hand through his hair and sat up.  he took a deep breath and patted felix’s shoulder as he got out of bed.  “really, lix, i’m okay.”

and honestly?  he thought he might be.  as he stood, the pain in his stomach faded.  he wondered if he’d just had a nightmare.   he’d be fine.

he just really didn’t want to eat breakfast, even if seungmin was willing to share what he’d made for once.  it pained changbin to turn him down, and seemed to confuse the younger boy.

“you just got up, right?”  seungmin had already prepared a whole plate for changbin.  jeongin joined them, his ears perking up at seungmin’s question.

changbin shrugged.  “not hungry, that’s all.”

“are you sick?”  jisung’s eyebrows were drawn closely together, concerned little-brother mode activated.  changbin knew he should care more about that, but he didn’t have the energy and just shrugged.  even minho, as he walked into the kitchen, looked moderately concerned.

“you look like shit,” minho stated suddenly.  it was almost reassuring - at least he was acting like he normally did, unapologetically savage - but his tone of voice was off.  almost… concerned?

jeongin, who’d followed minho into the kitchen, was even less subtle, walking as far around changbin as he could on his way to the refrigerator.

“you’re all so dramatic, i’m fine,” changbin said, not loving this kind of attention at all.  he sat down with a thump and slumped in his seat, pouting, the most dramatic of all no doubt.  but also, the longer he sat there, the more his stomach hurt.

“changbin-hyung?”  it’s not until he hears hyunjin’s voice that he realizes he’s zoned out.  it’s not until then that he realizes he’s gonna puke.  he doesn’t say anything, just kinda stares blankly while his brain takes far too long to process, his shoulders hunched up by his ears.  and then he’s fucking sprinting.  he quite literally crashes into chan on the way to the bathroom and has to choke down vomit.  fortunately, chan catches on and helps him to the toilet just in time.

it’s really awful and violent and painful and exhausting and changbin is so done by the time he’s finished forcing his stomach contents out of his body.  he’s melted into a whiney, crying, clinging mess and chan is not about to leave him like this.  he gets changbin settled on the couch and then announces that minho is in charge for the day cause he’s staying home with binnie.

felix finally shows his face and fuzzy morning hair and upon seeing tears on changbin’s face, immediately koala clings to him.  changbin whines and melts, guard completely down for once, curling into felix’s touch as the younger boy caresses changbin’s sweaty head.  it’s sweet, actually, the way felix focuses so completely on changbin.  chan sighs.

“okay, uh, correction: felix and i are staying home with binnie.  the rest of you are going to practice, staying on schedule.  seungmin’s in charge of organizing, scheduling, etc.  minho’s in charge of dance practice but hyunjin help him supervise.  the rest of you-“ chan made eye contact with jisung, who nodded, understanding that he would take on a bit more responsibility for the day as well without needing to be told allowed.  “the rest of you be good and help out.”

as the rest of the group rushed around in an attempt to make it to the company building on time, chan flopped onto the couch next to changbin.  felix looked at chan, not pausing in playing with changbin’s hair.  chan smiled at him, aiming at reassurance, and massaged changbin’s shoulder.

“how ya feeling, buddy?”

changbin moaned, buried his face deeper into felix’s stomach.  he mumbled something incoherent.  felix frowned and kissed the top of changbin’s head.  “that good, huh?”

changbin’s shoulders began to shake, small little shudders, and felix froze.  slowly, he titled changbin’s head back so that he could see his face, and the tears streaming down it.  he glanced towards chan, then back at changbin.  “hey,” he whispered.  “hey.  binnie-hyung, hey.”

“i’m so tired,” changbin sniffled.

“that’s okay, kid.  sleep.”  chan tugged lightly on changbin’s ear.  “you’ll feel better once you’ve had some rest.”

changbin nodded, and smushed his face into felix’s stomach once again.

“keep playing with his hair,” chan mouthed silently to felix.  felix nodded and did as instructed while chan started tracing shapes on changbin��s back.  minutes later, changbin was snoring quietly.

“he gets like this sometimes,” chan said quietly, in english.  felix looked up, the creases in his forehead deeper than ever.  “it’s okay,” chan nodded, “he’ll be fine once he’s feeling better, lix.”

felix nods, but the concern etched into his expression stays.  chan can’t help but smile.  of course he doesn’t want felix to worry, to be stressed— if he could take all the hardships from him, he would.  but then, this is one of the things that he loves most about felix; his complete dedication to his friends, his unhesitating willingness to feel not only for them, but with them.  and that’s the thing: he is strong enough to handle all of it.  so chan knows that felix doesn’t need to stop worrying about changbin right now, if that’s what he feels is right.  what felix needs right now was a distraction.

“hey, lix,” chan says, nudging the younge boy out of his thoughts.  “let’s play a game!”

felix grins.  “okay, hyung!  but, uh,” he glances at changbin, who is still laying on top of him, snoring softly, and lowers his voice to a whisper.  “i can’t really move right now, actually.

“so let’s do something that dooesn’t involve moving.  20 questions?”

“ah, yeah!”  felix shouts, a little too excited, maybe, but chan loves him all the more for it.

they play 20 questions for 15 minutes or so, and it’s nice.  frankly, chan had needed a day off, and this was as pleasant a way to spend it as he could think of.  as for felix, he was perfectly content snuggling and goofing off the whole day.  he was the only person chan knew who could cuddle for literal hours on end without overheating or feeling uncomfortable in some way.  he was also always extremely in tune to whoever he was snuggling with, so as soon as changbin starts to stir, felix is on high alert.

“changbin-hyung?”

“whfph slmph,” changbin responds.  felix looks at chan, hoping the older boy might be able to translate, but chan just shrugs.

“uh… what was that?”

“wanna sleep,” changbin’s voice cracks as he repeats himself, now slightly more lucid.

“no one’s stopping you,” chan says.  at that, changbin’s pout deepens.

“feels bad.”

chan’s tone softens.  “your stomach?”

changbin nods, wincing as the nausea increases.

“let’s get you to the bathroom, then.”  chan reaches out to offer his arm to changbin, but the sick boy shakes his head.

“won’t make it,” he mumbles, embarrassed, and cups a hand over his mouth.

“shit,” chan curses, eyes darting around the room.  There’s a small trashcan a few feet away in the kitchen, so he runs and grabs it while felix helps changbin sit up a bit more.

chan returns just in time.  almost as soon as he sets the trashcan between changbin’s legs, a heave has his whole body lurching forward.  vomit splatters against the flimsy garbage bag and changbin whines before sputtering up another wave.  his whole body is shaking, and chan can’t tell if it’s from the strain or the fever as the younger boy remains panting over the mess, strands of barf dripping from his lips, a bit on his chin.

felix is ready with a tissue to clean him up, but changbin waves him away, squeezing his eyes shut in a last-ditch effort to avoid the inevitable, but his mouth starts watering excessively anyway.  he’s so tired.  a sob escapes his mouth and he reaches his hand out- for who, for what, he doesn’t know, just something to make it stop, or at least make it better, bearable.

he finds felix, or felix finds him, or they meet somewhere in the middle, and changbin squeezes his hand.  between that and chan massaging his shoulders, changbin thinks, he kind of got what he was looking for.  chan, his anchor.  felix, his light.  things are a little bit better, a little more bearable.

of course, suffering through another round of vomiting was never pleasant.  fortunately, it didn’t last long.  one last big wave, followed by a handful of smaller gags, and changbin leaned back onto the couch, grateful to chan and felix for cleaning him up, but too exhausted to say so.

he still felt off.  he still felt tired.  still felt sick, and honestly, still felt a little bit lonely.  and yet, as he curled up once again between chan and felix, it was much easier to remember he wasn’t alone.

——

feel free to send more asks!

[luna-dare]

hi! can i please request for harry potter x hufflepuff!reader where she is a redhead but is not a weasley so he ask ron for advice but his advices are a mess and he thinks she sees him as a freak but in reality she thinks he’s really cute? sorry if it’s kinda messed up. thank you!

It’s a Potter request! I haven’t done one of these yet. Thank you for the request!

     Harry stared from the Gryffindor table. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from you. From your fiery red hair to your gorgeous smile, you were absolutely perfect. You had always been so kind to everyone, whether they deserved it or not. You were also gifted in herbology. Your very being radiated with life.

    A newspaper smacked him upside the head. “Sorry, Harry, but you were staring,” one of the twins said. “Again,” the older boy smirked.

    “Honestly, mate, when are you going to tell her?” The other questioned.

    “He doesn’t plan on telling her because he’s worried she’ll reject him.” Hermione took the newspaper and proceeded to flip through it while the boys nearby groaned.

    “Harry, you’re a fumbling mess! Fix up and just go.” Seamus rolled his eyes at the Potter boy. Many Gryffindors had grown tired of Harry’s pining. If Dean heard one more word about the Hufflepuff, he would not be held responsible for what happened to the Seeker. Even McGonagall was aware of Harry’s not so little crush on the girl. She may or may not have placed the two together in a few projects for this very reason.

    “Harry, don’t worry about being rejected and just go for it.”

    “Harry, Neville just told you to go for it. If that doesn’t tell you that this has gotten ridiculous, I don’t know what will.”

    He looked between his friends before allowing his eyes to drift back to you. He sighed in defeat. “I would if I could but… how? It’s not like I can just walk right up to her.”

    “Technically you can.”

    “Not helping, Hermione.”

    Ron contemplated for a moment before deciding something. “I’ll help you.”

    “What? Are you joking?” Harry sent Ron a bewildered look.

    “You help with girls?” The twins doubled over laughing. “Harry’d be better off on his own than with your help. When was the last time you even properly flirted with a girl, Ron?”

    “I don’t see either of you boasting a girlfriend either.”

     “Very perceptive, dear brother. Maybe next you’ll realize that there’s a puking pastel in your drink.”

     “What?!”

    “I wouldn’t mind the help…” Harry knew that he needed to do something. He couldn’t spend the rest of his time at Hogwarts staring at her without doing anything. It was time to act on these feelings.

    “Suit yourself.” With that, the twins got up and left the dining hall. Harry then turned to Ron.

     “So, what do I do?”

     “First,” the redhead leaned over the table, “you’ve gotta reel her in, see. Let her know your interested, but not too interested, understand?”

     “I- I guess?”

     The next day, there was a quidditch match. It was Gryffindor vs Hufflepuff. The match had been pretty intense. The quaffle had gone back and forth across the field. While Harry looked for the snitch he saw it all play out. You were a chaser, so wherever the quaffle was, you weren’t far behind. You had scored a few points and almost got hit by a bludger during the game. Harry swore he almost had a heart attack when it neared your head.

     He finally spotted the snitch, diving for it. The Hufflepuff seeker was quick to follow. As they raced for it, Harry pulled ahead just enough to grab onto the small golden orb. The elation of the crowd sent a surge of pride through him. He turned to his teammates, waving it in the air. When they had all landed, the twins hoisted Harry onto their shoulders.

     Harry saw you leaving the field. Your shoulders sagged but you didn’t seem too upset about the loss. He could see the sheen of sweat on your skin. You had worked so hard during the game, he almost felt bad about getting the snitch first. When the twins put him down, he made his way towards you, calling out, “[Y/N]!”

     You turned around, giving him a tired smile. “Hiya, Harry. Good game today.”

     “Yeah. Good game. Um… [Y/N]? Can I ask you something?”

     You were thankful that your cheeks were already red from exertion during the game. You were confident they’d be a lovely shade of pink right about now. “Sure thing, Harry. What’s on your mind?”

     Poor boy’s throat went dry and his mind went blank. “Did… did you…” His voice cracked. Quickly clearing his throat, he said, “Did you just win a quidditch match? Because y-you look fly.” Smooth, Harry. Real smooth.

     “Harry, you just beat us?” You fought down a smile. His face lit up and he started shuffling. All he could think was ABORT! ABORT! He came up with some weak excuse before fleeing to the safety of the changing room. The moment he came in, the team, along with Ron bombarded him with questions.

     “Did you do it?”

     “Did you tell her?”

     “What’d she say?”

     Harry shrunk down before hesitantly telling them what happened. “Quite the lady killer we’ve got, ay guys?” Fred watched Oliver repeatedly hit his head on the wall. Ron blanched at him for a second before shaking his head.

     “Alright, so that didn’t work. Guess we’ll just have to try something else.”

     The next day, the boys had come up with a different plan. “’Actions speak louder than words’, right? That’s what Hermione said. Try showing [Y/N] how you feel instead of telling her.” Sounds simple enough, doesn’t it? It’s not.

     Harry had roped the boys and Hermione into helping him. They wrote multiple small notes, each with a clue to where the next was. Harry was supposed to be at the end of the trail, holding a final one that told you how he felt. He then used his invisibility cloak to hide them in their designated places. Tomorrow was Saturday, so all he had to do was wait.

     When mail came the next day, Harry watch as your owl came to you and gave you the first note. Once you had opened it, he got up and headed to the final spot. The twins winked at him. Neville gave him a thumbs up while Dean and Seamus rolled their eyes. 

     Harry waited for about 15 minutes before he heard someone start to approach him from behind. Well that was fast. He got up to greet you. “[Y/-” It wasn’t you. It was Filch. In the grumpy mans fist were about half the notes Harry and the others had made for you. The boy could feel the color drain from his face.

     “Hello, Potter. Expecting someone else?” The two looked at each other for a moment before Filch grabbed Harry’s arm and started dragging him back to the castle, likely for detention. 

     On the way to Filch’s office, Harry saw you looking around for the next note. It was probably the first note that Filch had found. He wondered how you’d feel after you didn’t find it. He looked down and continued to shuffle along with Filch.

    He didn’t see when you smiled at him. Nor did he see how that smile slightly fell when you saw Filch. But, you noticed that both of Filch’s hands were clenched. One around Harry’s shirt, and the other around slips of paper that looked exactly like the ones folded in your bag. You were giddy as you headed back to your common room.

     Morning came and Harry spent a fair amount of breakfast pouting about the failed attempt. Seamus and Dean were both slightly annoyed that they were kept up late for nothing.

     “Cheer up, Harry, I’m sure Filch adored all those lovely letters you wrote him yesterday,” Fred grinned.

     “Sod off.”

     The group started to laugh before they all froze. They watched as leaves came out of Harry’s cup. A flower bud appeared in the center. It slowly opened to show an intricate pattern of petals. Once it stopped, Harry gently brushed his fingers against the flower.

     Neville was grinning to his ears, looking from the flower to Harry. “Do you all know what that is?” The Weasley brothers all shook their heads while Harry continued to stare at it. “Harry, that’s a camellia!”

     “This the part where you tell us why that matters?”

     “Make sure to speak English, mate.”

      “Camellia flowers represent love, affection, and admiration. And, look who sent it.” Neville pointed to the Hufflepuff table. Your wand was still in hand as you waved at Harry. Your smile was brighter than Harry had ever seen it. You got up and made your way out of the dining hall.

     “[Y/N]?”

     “I may or may not have got a little impatient, but I doubted you’d get to the point if I didn’t.”

    “Wait, you knew?”

     “It was kind of obvious from the start, considering how much you stare at me.” Harry face-palmed at his own foolishness. “But,” you gently took his hand, “it was cute to watch the great Harry Potter struggle to tell me his own feelings.”

     “Cute?” A faint blush rose to his cheeks while you nodded. “I thought you’d think I was mad. What with the whole pickup line fail, not even mentioning yesterday...”

     You kissed him on the cheek. “Hogsmeade next weekend?”

      “I- I’d love to.”

     Down the hall, cheers erupted. The twins were wooping while the others applaud. A loud “Finally!” came from Seamus. Some of your own friends were whistling with the group. You both laughed at their antics before leaving hand-in-hand to enjoy the rest of the day together. It seems Hogwarts has a new #1 couple.

[pixieposts]

Febuwhump Day 20

AO3

Today’s prompt was: “Betrayal” but I couldn’t think of anything so here’s “Truth Serum”. I did go with a spell VS a literal serum, and I’m not 100 percent sure how much I actually like it now... but oh well, here it is!

TWs:

None unless you count Caleb Widogast Levels of Self-hatred.

It started, as so many of his problems did, with a spell.  The unknown scroll, written in barely decipherable  undercommon , had held his attention from the moment Veth pulled it off the body of the Drow.  He had been forced to wait hours to finally try it out, stepping away from the others when they stopped for lunch.    

Honestly, he ended up disappointed.  He had only been able to translate about half of the notes, and upon testing out the verbal and somatic portions on himself... he didn’t feel any different.  He sighed, he would have to look it over again tonight in the tower.  Maybe he could show  Essek  when they returned to the  Xhorhouse...  

“Ready to go man?” Beau called from where the others were waiting.  

“Ja, on my way”  

He walked over and made his way towards the cart they had procured from Dr  Waccoh .  He had to admit, he rather missed the  Moorbounders , but this made carrying back the supplies much easier.  As he reached the cart, he was stopped by a large green hand on his arm.  He turned and smiled at Fjord, raising an eyebrow in question.  

“Saw you were caught up with your books, so I grabbed you some lunch” He held out a  sandwich  wrapped in cloth.  

“Danke Fjord, you are always so thoughtful, truly it is a wonderful trait” He took the sandwich, lightly squeezing the hand on his arm and climbed into the cart before realizing what he had said.  It was true of course, but he didn’t make a habit of telling Fjord what he thought of him.  That way lies madness.  He felt his face heat up when he looked up to see Fjord staring at his hand uncertainly.  He ate the sandwich slowly as they rode, trying to sort out just how awkward things would be when they stopped for the night.  Fjord didn’t seem any different than normal as Caleb watched him over the top of his book, joking with Beau and keeping watch with Caduceus.  Well, that was good he supposed, he would hate for Fjord to be uncomfortable around him.  

Wait, he would?    

Well, of course he would, but that didn’t bear thinking about.    

“You’ve been super quiet today Cay-leb, what are you reading?”  

He tried not to jump as Jester plopped down next to him, snapping the book closed automatically.  

“Oh- I uh, I was just re-reading the history text we found last time we were at the bookstore” he shrugged “it would probably bore you”  

Jester hummed non- committally  and settled in next to him, pulling out her sketchbook.  

“Are you like, totally sure you’re okay though?  You haven’t talked to anyone in hours!”  

“I am not as much of a chatterbox as others in our little group” he teased, elbowing her lightly “I have just been distracted”  

“By your book?”  

“Nein, by Fjord” he paused, distracted by the half-orc in question “and that spell I found, I cannot figure out why it didn’t work earlier”  

“Wait wait, you’re distracted by Fjord?”  

“And my new spell I-” he clapped his hands over his mouth, suddenly realizing what he had just said.    

“Caleb!  Do you have a  crush  on Fjord?” Jester, thankfully, was whispering now, lavender eyes wide.  

“I- I-” he held his hands over his own mouth again and stared in horror at Jester until she furrowed her brow at him  

“Wait, are you okay?  You definitely look like you’re going to puke”  

He shook his head vigorously, releasing his own face to grab the scroll from his coat.  He laid it out and scanned it, feeling the tension build in his chest.    

“ Beauregard ?  Come here please?”  

Beauregard walked up to the edge of the cart, hopping in as it moved like it was nothing.    

“ ’Sup  man?”  

“This word here, what does it look like to you?”  

She moved to sit on his other side and squinted down at the scroll.    

“Looks like... κρύ βω?  Wait... actually-” she  reached over and scrubbed at the parchment with her thumb, dislodging a smudge of dirt “there was a- it looks like  α ληθής now, why?”  

“Scheisse”  

She looked at him with an expression of dawning understanding and horror that matched his.  

“Dude, what did you do?”  

“I- I ah...” he swallowed “I think we need to stop for the night now”  

It didn’t take long for them to find a spot to hide the carts, he worked methodically setting up his alarm and the tower.  His head was spinning but he tried his best to stay calm.  Before he knew it, they were settled around the large table in the dining room and the others were all staring at him.  He explained what he had done, the words falling from his lips as though compelled, unable to hide a single mistake.    

“What do you mean you just tested it out on yourself?!  What if it had been something dangerous Caleb?” Beauregard sounded both worried and incredibly pissed off.  

“This seems pretty dangerous to me” Yasha mumbled into her mug.  

“ Well  I- I certainly was not about to test it out on any of you, and I was fairly certain I knew what it did...” he trailed off, looking down as he felt his cheeks heat “I would never have tested it on anyone else so I- it was the only option”  

“Why not wait and test it on an enemy Cay?” Fjord’s voice was patient as Beau grumbled behind him  

“I- I just thought it would be better to try it out and then know for sure what it did before we were in battle”  

“But what if you’d gotten hurt?  We wouldn’t even know what happened”  

“I do not think my safety is worth possibly missing out on something that could help us”  

Fjord opened his mouth as if to respond, but after a moment he shut it again, shaking his head sadly.  The others stayed quiet, passing thoughtful looks back and forth before Veth broke the silence.  

“So... what does it do?” Veth asked, eyeing the scroll as if it might bite “what did you think it did?”  

“I- well I thought it was some kind of invisibility spell, some way to hide, or help with stealth?” he tapped the word that Beauregarde had uncovered “it ah- it appears I was wrong; this word was obscured.  I thought it was the  undercommon  for “to-hide” but it... well, it is the word for “truth” instead so” he sighed, dropping his head into his hands.  

How had he been so stupid?  It was such a novice mistake to make, he was supposed to be better than that.    

There was silence around the table for a moment before Jester spoke up.  

“ So  like... does that mean you can’t lie at all or?”  

“I am not sure... I need to go over it again to see what it says in the context of-”  

“What’s your  favourite colour?”  

“Amber”  

“Do you actually like having a beard or do you just not want to shave?”  

“I lost my razor”  

He glared at Jester as the others yelled various versions of “stop” at her.  Jester shrugged and rolled her eyes.  

“I was just trying to see if he could lie!  Did you want to  answer,  or did you have to?”  

“I certainly did not want to, I do not like sharing information about myself Jester, you know that”  

He gripped his mouth again, glaring at her even as he felt his ears grow warm, but she just nodded and waved over at him triumphantly.  

“There, question answered!  Caleb can totally not lie at all” her expression softened “I guess we probably shouldn’t ask you anything else huh?”  

“I would prefer that, yes” he ground out, muffled by his hands.    

All through dinner the others tried not to direct questions at him, but despite their efforts he still ended up sharing more than he would have liked.  Finally, he stood and made his way to his room, bottom lip firmly gripped between his teeth.  This was awful, it was just more proof of his own hubris.  He felt like a complete idiot for letting something like this happen.  He spread the scroll out on the coffee table in his room and went back to work, thoroughly cleaning the damned thing first.  

An hour into his new translation, there was a knock on his door, he sighed.  

“Eintreten”  

The door opened without a sound, and then closed a moment later.  

“Hey Cay, just  wanted  to check in since...  y’know , it was a rough one”  

He felt the familiar thrill down his spine as Fjord spoke, not looking up for fear that even his expressions would be forcibly unguarded .  

“Ja, you could say that I suppose”  

“I figured... well, I thought you might like some company”  

Caleb watched out of the corner of his eye as Fjord settled himself on the couch Caleb was sitting in front of.  Gods how much he wanted to lean back against Fjords legs.  

“Sure, I always enjoy spending time with you”  

He blushed, damn it.  He hadn’t meant to say that  out loud ... he had let his guard down  again .    

“I ah- I have discovered that there is a time limit on the spell, so I will be free of it by morning” he raced to fill the quiet, trying to wash over what he had just said.  

He felt Fjord shift slightly behind him before a warm hand settled on his shoulder.  

“We don’t have to talk Caleb, it’s alright, I don’t want you to feel like you have to say anything you don’t want to”  

“Why are you so nice to me?”  

Caleb bit his tongue and glared at the scroll, stupid gods damned awful spell.  He was going to copy it out and then burn the damned scroll to ash.  All it had done was make him act like the idiot he really was.  Stupid bloody loose-tongued-  

“That’s a strange question” Fjords other hand came to rest on his other shoulder, both thumbs making little circles at the base of his neck “I’m nice to you because I like you, thought that was obvious”  

Caleb shook his head, fighting not to lean into the touch.  

“I do  not  deserve-”  

“Well now, how about you let me decide how I want to treat you hm?  I like you, and I try to be nice to the people I like, I say you do deserve it”  

“Fjord”  he groaned, Fjord didn’t understand “you know what I have done, the horrors I have committed”  

“Mhmm , I surely do” the circles turned to long strokes along the back of his shoulders “and I’ve told you before, you’re a good man with a tough past.  That kid isn’t you anymore”  

Caleb let his eyes close as he finally gave in, leaning into Fjord entirely.  

“A mess is what I am, a walking, talking disaster”  

“Yeah well, we all are, it’s why we get along so well”  

“I think you could get along with anyone, you are amazing”  

Fjord hummed, pausing his shoulder rub to tuck a strand of Caleb’s hair back.  Caleb knew he must be blushing by now, but if everything else about him was going to be over-honest, his complexion might as well.  They sat that way for a while, Fjord working some of the tightness out of Caleb’s shoulders while Caleb  reveled  in the way it quieted his mind.    

“That feels wonderful” he sounded breathless, even to his own ears “truly Fjord”  

Fjord chuckled “anytime, your poor shoulders feel like you could use it”  

“Hmm... perhaps they could, but you know I will never ask”  

“Stubborn bastard”  

“That’s me, stubborn and squishy”  

“I like that about you”  

“That I am squishy?”  

“No, you brat, that you’re stubborn” Fjord’s voice was fond “it’s gotten us out of more than a few scrapes”    

One hand slid up to rub at the sides of Caleb’s neck, just below his hairline, and he had to bite his lip to stop the groan that wanted to slip out.  When was the last time anyone had touched him kindly like this?  He really didn’t deserve  it;  he was a horrible person.  Fjord was too good for him by half, too kind and caring for someone like Caleb.    

“Relax Cay, I’ve got you”  

“I do not deserve you”  

“You let me be the judge of that, now relax and tell me about this spell”  

To his own surprise, he did.  The remainder of the night was spent with Caleb talking about any spell Fjord asked about.  It was a safe subject, as he very rarely felt a need to lie about his magic... and never to Fjord.  Fjord for his part made sure to avoid any questions that weren’t directly related to spells, his hands never stilling.  Eventually, Fjord had to head back to his own room, both of them  wiped after a long day.  Caleb stood and stretched, amazed at how relaxed his shoulders felt, and walked Fjord to the door.  They stood for a moment, just looking at each other as Caleb tried to figure out how to thank Fjord without giving too much away.  It turned out that he hadn’t needed to worry.  Fjord stepped into Calebs space, a hand coming to rest on his hip.  

“There’s something we’re going to need to talk about tomorrow, once you have control over your words again”  

“O-oh?”  

“Mhmm , it’s been on my mind a while, and after hearing what you said to Jester today well... I think you might be amenable”  

Caleb’s heart was pounding as Fjord leaned in and pressed his lips to Caleb’s in a gentle kiss.  Caleb gripped the front of his shirt, pushing up onto his toes to kiss back.  When Fjord pulled away, there  was a  soft smile playing across his mouth.  

“Tomorrow, sound good?”  

“It sounds perfect”  

[severeblizzardlady]

Music in My Ears

Soulmate AU - You hear your soulmate’s music. But what are you supposed to do if they happen to be in another universe entirely? 

Pairing: Jin Bubaigawara x Reader

Warnings: Cursing, Sexual themes (some non-con/dubious consent), Jin’s shenanigans (also, language barriers? Sometimes they’re a thing, sometimes they’re not), and a weeeeee bit of yandere

Disclaimer: I don’t own the music

“Baby shark, do-do-do-do-do-do. Baby shark--”

“[Name], I swear to God, you need to stop singing that fucking song.” Your cousin said, glaring at you from the corner of her eye. After visiting your cousin and her family for the week, it was time for you to fly back home. She’d offered to drive you to the airport, even though you were fine with getting a taxi. 

Obviously, she was starting to regret it.

“It’s not my fault that’s the only thing your kids wanna listen to!” You snapped. And it was true. The entire time you’d been there, those sweet, angelic children begged to hear that song at least once or twice a day. 

She muttered something then, something about “empty heads,” but Mom had taught you not to hit someone when they were driving. Louder, she said, “Just listen to the song all the way through. That should get it out.”

“Okay,” You reached for the stereo’s power button only to get your hand smacked. “Hey!”

“I’m not listening to it, use your player!”

Dammit. “Hmph, this better work,” You stuffed your earbuds into your ears, finding the song. “I don’t wanna get thrown off the plane mid-flight.” 

---

“No good, no good, no good.” Jin Bubaigawara, AKA the villain Twice, couldn’t breathe. The walls were constricting all around him, and not just from that yakuza Mimic. He’d been slow in making the wall that separated Twice from that Salaryman hero. It was on purpose, he’d wanted Jin to get caught.

No way, that couldn’t be right!

Gin grit his teeth. The pull was getting worse, the one deep inside, threatening to rip him into pieces--of course it wasn’t, he was fine. Just dandy even!

“Gonna split apart. Hooray! I’m...splitting!! I won’t!”

Hurting, it hurt so bad. No, actually, it felt just fine, like a warm bubble bath! Where was Toga? Why couldn’t he have just ignored those beaked bastards that day?

“Gonna split...if I don’t cover up!!” He, he was--

“Baby shark do-do-do-do-do-do. Baby shark do-do-do-do-do-do. Baby shark do-do-do-do-do-do. Baby shark!”

The splitting stopped. Something in Jin’s chest shifted, no it didn’t! It was deeper, in his soul. Like a piece that he hadn’t realized was missing had just snapped into place as music filled his ears. A song about sharks that just kept going in his ears. Even as Toga wrapped her handkerchief around his head to prevent him from splitting further (Unfortunately!~). 

Did this mean he had a soulmate? For all of his life, Jin had never had a soulmark. No red strings, no mysterious bruises (but the ones he made were plenty mysterious on their own!), no music...until now. The song sounded like it was for kids, a real banger! Was his soulmate a kid? They could just call him grandpa!

“If this cooperation thing doesn’t work out,” Toga said suddenly, dragging Jin out of his thoughts (She didn’t have to be jealous!). “We’ll never get our revenge.”

“It’s the end do-do-do-do-do-o. It’s the end!”

---

You didn’t get thrown off the plane. And you no longer had the Baby Shark song in your head. Both were a plus. 

Once you were home safe and sound, you had a little time to rest and relax before you were back to work again. Honestly, you hadn’t planned to spend your entire time off visiting family, but your parents blackmailed you. Really, you serenade a cat in public one time, and suddenly you’re marked for life. 

Whatever, you would do it again in a heartbeat. All cats deserve to know they’re loved!

You worked. And worked. And worked. And worked. And every day after work, you’d collapse on your couch with something quick to eat, like food from the freezer section at the store or takeout. Sometimes your neighbors, the couple in the next place over, would start yelling or start having sex. Both were loud and messed with your stomach--whether in anxiety or just...not wanting to hear them have sex because, holy shit, who had sex that often (where they leads in a smutty romance?). So you’d listen to music. 

You flinched at a dull thump that came from the wall on the other side of your apartment. You knew, from the one time they’d invited you over, that your neighbors had a bookshelf there. It sounded an awful lot like something had been slammed into it. 

“O-oh fuck!” The woman moaned.

“Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope.” You nearly threw your takeout to the floor with how quickly you grabbed your ear buds. Trying to shove them into your ears as a repetitive thud started, you turned up the volume as high as you could before pressing play. Then, as Freaks by Timmy Trumpet started playing, you collected your food and hustled to the bedroom.

“I need to move.” 

---

“The bass and the tweeters make the speakers go to war. Ah, the mighty trumpet brings the freaks out to the floor.”

“You’re doing it again.” 

“Huh?” Jin whipped around to see Dabi fixing him with a blank stare. Wait, nu-uh, the blank stare was his usual look. That was Dabi’s annoyed look. 

When Jin just kept staring back, Dabi sighed. “You hearing your soulmate again? Every time you do, you start wriggling like you’re gonna pee yourself.”

“That’s because I wanna dance! Nah, you caught me, this music’s bad on my bladder!” 

Weeks had passed after the League had gotten their revenge on the bird bastard yakuza. With vengeance for Big Sis Magne taken care of, it was back to business. Well, when they felt like it anyway! They mostly lazed around a lot. 

With the yakuza’s serum in their hands, it should’ve been smoother sailing, but Jin wasn’t able to copy it. Shigaraki’s disappointment had been palpable that day (well, maybe he was just constipated!). The guilt of it weighed on Jin. Again, he’d let his friends down again. 

And yet, every time he felt down, every time he felt like a failure, he heard it. Music. His soulmate (stalker!).

The second time he heard the music was when he was in the middle of a League meeting. One second it had been quiet, nothing but Shigaraki discussing their next steps, and then: 

What a splendid pie, pizza-pizza pie. Every minute, every second, buy, buy, buy, buy, buy! 

 He was pretty sure kids didn’t listen to metal. But maybe their parents were just really edgy!! 

But the songs kept coming, none like the first. Some had a whimsical element to them, though, like the music had been doused in glitter and summoned from a unicorn’s ass. 

The music always came when Jin needed it. Always when he felt useless, like he couldn’t provide for his friends or protect their happiness. Maybe his soulmate could sense his distress and that caused the music. Nah, it was aliens.

“I still think we should find ‘em!” Toga cut in, chin resting on her hands. “Even if you don’t recognize the music, you. Being away from your soulmate for too long can’t be healthy!” 

“Yeah,” Spinner piped up, “but even so, how’re we supposed to find them? We can’t even find that music online.” 

Both were good points (eh, sorta). Soulmates had to unit at some point, particularly those with a hearing bond. Eventually, they’d begin hearing more than just each other’s music. They’d hear conversations and anything else their mate happened to hear. It drove people insane, the way the universe was desperate for destined lovers to be together. Or maybe it needed to be more aggressive, push a little harder! 

But....

“We’ll find them eventually,” Jin gave his friends a thumbs up. “For now, let’s focus on what’s ahead of us!” Of course a soulmate was nice, especially one that cared for him--so nosy!--the way his did. But his friends needed him. Unlike his soulmate, they were right there, and he could make sure they got everything they needed for their happiness. 

Toga watched him with curious eyes even when Shigaraki finally arrived for the meeting, but she didn’t say anything else. 

---

“You don’t look too good, [Name].” 

You smiled despite your upset stomach, trying to wave off your coworker’s concerned stare. “Had a little bit of food poisoning this morning.” Just the mention of food made your stomach want to wring itself out until you vomited again. 

It’d been a mistake, drinking as much as you had the night before, but you’d finally managed to snag a new place and had celebrated with a drink. Or three. Man, that had not been smart. 

“Hey, if you’re not feeling well, head on home, all right?” Your coworker said, stepping back a little. Like you were going to puke on her pumps. You would’ve bristled at that if your head didn’t hurt so much. A little bit of vomit would’ve been an improvement. Her shoes looked like they’d seen better days. “We’ve got that meeting this morning too.”

Yeah, that was the only reason you’d shown up. Your boss had reminded everyone about how important the meeting was. There was no way you could miss, especially not because you were hung over. 

As you ambled into the meeting room, there was a buzzing in your ear. You frowned, rubbing the back of your neck. Instead of dying down, especially once the meeting started, it got worse, to the point the buzzing sounded like, like music. A slow song, one full of longing and love. God, were you so messed up from just three drinks that you were suddenly hearing music? 

Which was what you thought. At first. But then it kept happening when you hadn’t had any alcohol. It was never at the same time of day, sometimes it happened when you were eating lunch or talking to someone. It was good, almost always rock after that first romantic-ish sounding song, but you had no idea why it was happening. 

You could still hear, but there was music. Music no one else could hear, and you’d asked plenty of your coworkers, nearly making an ass of yourself in the process. 

The only time it stopped was when you got home. The time you really needed it to and had to resort to your own music (until you could move out at least). 

You wondered if you were going crazy.

---

Jin was going crazy. And he didn’t want to say it was Shigaraki’s fault, because it honestly wasn’t! It really fucking was though. 

“We’re finding your soulmate,” Shigaraki said one day after they’d taken down a wannabe villain group that was trying to stake a claim on the League’s territory. The group had some valuables among them, some money and a nice stereo system.

Shigaraki had taken one look at it all and demanded it get carried back to the base. Mr. Compress, the swell guy, did all the heavy lifting, and he’d broken a sweat by the end of it! 

 “I thought we had more important things to do,” Dabi groused. He’d stepped out earlier, something about calling a potential recruit.

“We’re not doing anything without Jin,” Shigaraki stated, turning on the system. Music filled the air. “And if that means we have to take the time to find his soulmate, we’ll do it.”

If only Shigaraki wasn’t looking out for them all. If only Shigaraki didn’t believe in him. Because even with the music on his side, nothing had changed. Jin was letting everyone down because nothing seemed to be working. Not that first song, the one that was literally saying, “I’m here, darling, come find me. May this song be the only one that fills your ears so you know I’m thinking of you.” It was made for auditory soulmates by a singer with an auditory soulmate. 

It was because you were a child, wasn’t it? Because you didn’t understand, were too young, couldn’t tell your parents. You were avoiding him, wanted nothing to do with him, thought he was a waste of your time. 

The music could only do so much to fill the void your presence would fill. He couldn’t think about anything for too long without you somehow being involved. People watching turned into wondering what you were like. Fighting turned into imagining you being amazed by his abilities. Smoking out his window at night turned into dreams of you calling for him from his bed, saying you missed him. Needed him. 

But the searches still turned out nothing. The music did nothing. It was like you weren’t even real to begin with. 

Where were you?

---

“It doesn’t look like anything’s wrong. To be honest, your hearing seems to be even better than most at your age!”

That had been the oto--ear doctor’s diagnosis after he’d tested you. After a quick Google search, you’d been sure you had tinnitus, which would’ve made sense with how much music you played to drown out your surroundings, but apparently you were wrong.

You hadn’t told the doctor you were hearing full songs that you’d never heard before. But maybe you should’ve? Even as you’d gotten in your car after the appointment, you could hear it again, that slow, yearning song that you’d first heard. God, if only Google had a melody search bar!

The music had stopped as you pulled into the apartment parking lot. You sighed. “Just like clockwork, huh?” 

It was your last night at the apartment. Tomorrow, you were moving everything into a new place. One that  was closer to your work so you’d be able to walk more. Maybe get some fresh air. And maybe the change would make the weird music go away. 

Not wasting a second, you pulled out your headphones and stuck them in your ears. Who knew what would be waiting for you tonight? At least it would be the last time though! With that happy thought, you stepped out of your car....

and felt the world give way underneath your feet.

---

“I know that we’re just perfect strangers, and perfect strangers, that just won’t do, no.”

God, were you trying to kill him? 

Another day fighting nobodies and taking everything they had. Jin felt like his skin was too tight on his bones, like everything was too loud and too bright and not bright enough. Jin had gone back to the base early. It was a bad idea, too dangerous (how fun!) on his own. But he needed to play the song again. 

He’d been playing  music all the time to tell you he was there listening, waiting, needing. Except you weren’t coming (Sure you were!), always just teasing him with your stupid music--nope, you were definitely calling to him right back!

“Why not make today the day that a perfect stranger falls for you, oh!”

You didn’t want anything to do with him, that was why you were hiding! The fabric of his costume crinkled as Jin clenched his fists, body shaking with rage. You were just mocking him, tormenting him, he wasn’t worth your time at all!

“Then I don’t need you either!” He roared, lunging at the sound system--

There was a rumble. The building shook, throwing Jin off balance. He yelped, tumbling and shielded his head at the last second. The shaking stopped as soon as it started.

“What the hell?”

Yeah--wait. He didn’t say that. Slowly lowering his arms, Jin found himself staring at a complete stranger in the middle of the League’s base. 

---

You were sitting in some sort of warehouse. You blinked. Then you blinked again, just to see if that would help. It didn’t. “What the hell?”

Your ear buds were still in, “Herp de Derp” still playing in your ears. And you would’ve taken them out right away if it weren’t for the costumed guy on the floor staring at you. 

Was he some sort of cosplayer? The costume, black with silverish gray lines on the body suit and red wrist...things and a mask that was half gray and half black, looked sort of familiar. Like you’d seen it on Adult Swim at some point while channel surfing late at night. 

You hoped that all the muscle accentuated by the suit was padding. Wait, no, you needed to leave. 

“S-Sorry, I...where am I exactly?” He said something then, but you couldn’t quite hear because, duh, your music was still on. “Um, sorry,” you tapped your ears and tried to smile (it was all getting creepier by the second), “just lemme....” 

Tapping a finger on the screen, you paused the music, pulling out your ear buds.

The guy jolted to his feet then, making you flinch (you were starting to think the muscles were his, if the way they flexed was any indication). You had no idea what kind of expression he had under that mask but the eye holes were wider than they’d been before. Like he was bugging out. “You.”

“Y-yeah?” He had a really nice voice. It was a shame things were getting more surreal and even creepier by the second. You were still on the ground, your legs felt numb.

He was on you before you even realized it, solid, warm body pushing into you, making you feel that, no, there was no padding. The shock of it startled you, making your nerves zing in a way they never had before, like something about this was right, even as your stomach flopped at the fact that you were in a strange place with a strange man who was touching you. 

His body slotted against yours perfectly, making you feel every inch of him. Your mouth was dry, no words could come out, only a slight squeak. “You’re not a kid, I was worried. I was looking forward to being called ‘grandpa’!” His hands trembled as they went to your face, tracing your lips, cupping your cheeks. “I knew the universe would make sure we came together. Except this was all me!” 

You had no idea how to respond, not to his babbling or his contradictory way of speaking. You didn’t get a chance to either. His mouth was on yours, lower half of his mask pushed up out of the way. There was a vague feeling of stubble, but all you could focus on was the tongue in your mouth, inviting yours to meet it. 

All you could focus on was the thick hands sliding down to your ass to drag you forward until you were sitting in this man’s lap. 

All you could focus on was the heat of it all. Of how good it felt. Of wanting more. Of wanting to go home, wherever that was. 

He moaned when you clutched at his back, mouth leaving yours to plant kisses down your neck. “My soulmate, all mine. Finally.” He panted the words between each kiss, as though being away from your skin for even a second was too long.

Soulmate?

You shivered when he began to shift, hands moving to your hips. When he finally spoke again, his voice was raspy, thick with desire and something too dark to be considered love:

“I’ll never let you go.”

[bakugou-tm]

Spring Break Horomones (Bakugou x Reader Oneshot)

It’s finally Spring Break and your class decides to have a pool party in celebration. Unfortunately for you, that time of the month has decided to come the day before the party. Instead of ditching the party, you still come but remain on the sidelines. While your class thinks you’re just being a party pooper, Kaminari and Mineta plan a foolish idea that humiliates you, plans their doom, and makes you and Bakugou grow closer together.

Rating: Angst n Fluff

Words: 4995

This idea literally came to me when I was in a taxi because I’ve unfortunately had a similar situation happen to me. I’m actually fairly proud of this, I think it gets better as it goes along. I also made it a readmore because it’s r e a l l y long. Anyways enjOY because I actually updated something for once

When your class asked to have a pool party on the first day of spring break, you all had expected the answer to be a big fat no. Especially after what happened last summer when the boys took advantage of their ‘training time’.

It was much to the class’s surprise, and excitement, that you all had convinced Mr. Aizawa to say yes. Of course it was with the help of the class’s well rounded students like Iida, Momo, and Midoriya. 

But it didn’t matter how it happened, everyone was just excited they were able to make it happen.

You had been dying to have a pool party with your friends, for obvious reasons. Free food, games with your friends, and you even got to flaunt your new bathing suit to your new boyfriend.

The only reason the temperamental blond agreed to coming to the party was because you begged him practically on your hands and knees to. When he finally said yes you honestly believed it was too good to be true.

That is until you got home and a new obstacle stood in your way.

Of course the one week of the year everybody went to the beach and played in the water and laid out in the sun: you had to get your damned period.

Admittedly you could always put on a tampon so you didn’t have to miss out on the spring break activities, but with the pool party being on your second day you knew a tampon wasn’t going to hold on the second day of your hell week.

At first you thought of just not going to the party anymore, but you knew your friends would never let you bail out so last minute, not to mention you had finally convinced your boyfriend to show up. You couldn’t just drop out now.

So you decided upon begrudgingly, going to the party. After all the only thing you couldn’t do is swim, right? That didn’t mean you couldn’t socialize and enjoy the tasty snacks?

And up until this very moment, your plan was going smoothly. You enjoyed the fresh made food thanks to Sato, you destroyed your fellow classmates in limbo thanks to your (insert whatever your heart desires) quirk, and you got to spend time talking with your friends.

The only downside is Bakugou and Kirishima were showing up late because Bakugou insisted he couldn’t miss his afternoon workout session for some “waste of time party”.

At this point it was better than nothing.

So for the past hour you sat in a lounge chair, watching as your classmates splashed around in the water like crazy people. Although what could you really expect from a bunch of heroes having chicken fights.

You felt a small pout form on your lips as you watched them play around, wishing desperately you could join them in the water. Your hormones really did tend to have bad timing.

The sound of your phone text tone distracted you from your negative thoughts, seeing your boyfriend’s contact name appear on the screen.

Blasty Babe ♡ : We’re on our fucking way, your ass better be there

At reading the rather blunt message, you felt the corner of your lips curve up into a smile. If anyone could make you feel better, it was him.

As hot headed and irrational as Bakugou could be, he also treated you like you were his entire world and you couldn’t get enough.

Sliding the phone into both of your hands you began to tap away, reassuring your boyfriend that your ass was indeed still by the poolside.

That is, until a nasally voice called out your name.

“Oi (L/n), would you mind grabbing me a soda? I’m dying of thirst in here!” Mineta shouted from the poolside.

Raising an eyebrow you looked the small boy up and down, confused as to why he asked you of all people.

“Dying of thirst in a pool?”

“C’mon (L/n) you know I can’t drink pool water? I’ve been swimming for hours! Pretty please?”

In any normal circumstance you would’ve said no, but this was honestly the first time the perverted grape boy had ever used manners with you, or any other girl. After all swimming could be exhausting at times, and you were already out of the pool.

“Alright alright, I got it,” You sighed, standing up slowly to stretch out your sore muscles before shuffling over to the cooler, “What flavor do you want?”

At the sound of the smug nasally chuckle from behind you, you began to regret your question, knowing exactly what flavor he would want.

“Cmon girl you already know what flavor I want, I’ll give you a hint it matches my balls.”

Your lip jutted out into an unimpressed pout as you whipped your head back to deadpan at the small boy as he simply winked at you.

“I don’t think we have puke flavored soda.” You muttered, wishing Bakugou were here to kick the boy away like he always did when he flirted with you.

While you bent down to open the cooler and pull out a grape soda, you remained oblivious to the plan being put on behind you.

The grape haired boy slowly came out of the pool and met with Kaminari who began to creep up on you from behind.

“Step one completed, now for Step two of our brilliant plan.” Mineta whispered with a deviant look in his eyes, “I can’t wait to see what her swimsuit looks like all wet, it’ll look hotter than it does on her now.”

Both boys seemed to be dazed in lala land, picturing your dry form being splashed in the water. It had been there plan from all along. With no Bakugou around it had been the perfect time to fulfill their dreams.

Your classmates were aware of the plan as well, but for different reasons. They figured you were just being a party pooper and waiting for your boyfriend to get there so they figured throwing you in the water would be the perfect plan to bring you in.

Little did they know the mischievous intent the two idea makers actually had in mind.

“You better not tell Bakugou about this, he’ll kill me.” Kaminari warned as the two began to draw near your bent over form.

Biting your lip you continued to snake your hand around the ice, moving cans aside to find a stupid grape soda.

“Good lord is the last one really at the very bottom?”

Once your eyes fell on the purple can you quickly snatched it from the bottom and tugged it up from the other cans on top of it.

“Mineta-kun, I found your stupid soda!” You called out, shutting the cooler lid before turning around to face his floating head in the water, “I pretty much wrestled with every other drink to get it, so you better appreciate-”

Your words came to an end when you noticed the grape haired boy had disappeared from his spot in the water. You were about to call out his name until you noticed your classmates all staring at you with grins of their own.

“H..Huh? What’s going on? Where did Minet-”

Before you could even finish your sentence you felt a pair of strong arms wrap around your torso before lifting you up in the air.

“What the hell!” You shrieked, kicking your legs around until you felt a pair of small arms wrap around your ankles, “W..What’s going on?!”

“You’re going swimming whether you like it or not!” You heard Kaminari shout from behind you.

Oh shit.

Your eyes widened like saucers, your face turning back to see the two boys grinning like madmen as they began to walk you near the edge of the pool.

“G..Guys wait! You can’t do this please put me down!” You cried, trying to yank your body out of their grasp.

Soon the edge of the pool disappeared and all you could see was water, at this point you were clinging on to Kaminari’s arms for dear life. There was no way you could go in that water, you would be the embarrassment of the year!

“Denki I am serious, you need to put me down!” You shouted sternly, the threat going over his head but not over a few of your classmate’s heads.

A few of your friends seemed to notice the look of fear in your eyes, taking notice that it wasn’t a playful look of fear.

“Three... two...”

“Guys.. I think (L/n)’s not getting in the water for a different reason...” Momo said slowly, Jirou nodding beside her as she began to quickly wave her hands at Kaminari trying to get his attention.

“Wait Kaminari I don’t think you should throw her in-”

“One!”

The feeling of the air hitting your skin as you began to fall towards the dooming water was one you would never forget. The only thing you could do at this point was close your eyes and prepare for impact, praying that this turn out better than expected.

Once your body crashed into the water, a few cheers were heard from classmates as they saw you quickly swim back up to the surface. The only problem was when your head popped up, your expression looked as if you had seen a villain before you.

Ochako swam up to you with a concerned expression along with a few of your other friends, “(L/n) are you alright?”

You felt your eyes gloss over as you bit the inside of your cheek, begging yourself internally to not start crying on the spot.

“I’m on my period.” You whispered.

A few gasps were heard from the girls, all of their faces coming to an understanding. Momo, Mina, and Hagakure were already out of the water rushing to get you a towel as Ochako, Jirou, and Asui lead you out of the pool.

“Why didn’t you tell us (L/n)-chan?” Asui questioned with a frown on her face as she took in your look of worry and fear on your face.

Quickly moving up the steps you allowed Momo to wrap the towel around your body to cover up your dripping bathing suit, the rest of the girls surrounding you while the boys watched in confusion.

“I..I didn’t want to make a big deal about it and force you guys to do something else so I just stayed on the side.” You explained softly, looking down to already see a few water droplets mixed with red slide down the inside of your thigh.

At this you looked up quickly, face as red as a cherry at the given situation you were in.

All of your friends stood before you, worried because you failed to tell them the truth. The boys watched intently, confused as to what was going on. You must have ruined the entire party. Everybody could probably see the red dripping down your legs, how could you be such an idiot?

“Hey c’mon why are you covering her up? We wanna see her bathing suit!” Mineta whined, completely oblivious to the scene before him.

The girls seemed to read your panicking expression, Ochako quickly grabbing your arm to calm you down.

“Hey (L/n) it’s okay, this isn’t a big deal!”

“Yeah take it easy (L/n), we didn’t mean to embarrass you, what can we do to help?” Momo added.

The sound of the boys asking what’s wrong only made your face even more red, this was the worst moment of your life. The more you stood here the more you wanted to melt away into the cracks of the concrete.

Gritting your teeth at the multiple voices filling your head you finally squeezed your eyes shut, “It’s nothing, just leave me alone!”

After your loud shout, all your classmates saw was your (s/c) legs dashing down the poolside and towards the doors.

At least now you could hide in your dorm in just relax, away from all the observant eyes.

Just as your hands were about to meet the exit door, the entrance door swung right open, two pairs of red eyes immediately falling on your form.

Of course all of your luck just had to run out today. 

You specifically lock eyes with the ash blond, his once angry orbs widening in shock before they narrowed with concern.

Almost in slow motion you saw his change in emotions, the look in his eyes saying enough to know he was wondering what was wrong.

Not wanting him to see you like this a moment longer, you squeezed your (e/c) eyes shut, strings of feather like tears streaming down your face before you made a mad dash down the hallway.

Bakugou blinked for a moment, his head whipping back to you as if ready to run after you before he felt a hand on his chest. He glared to Kirishima before he noticed him pointing to his classmates, every one of them looking guilty as hell.

What could have happened in the hour he was gone going to the gym? You rarely cried, let alone in front of other people.

His confused expression darkened quickly enough, his hands beginning to spark furiously as he searched the crowd of eyes to see who was responsible.

“What the fuck happened, and who’s ass is responsible?” Bakugou roared, his feet smacking against the wet concrete towards his classmates.

It was obvious enough by the way Kaminari shamefully looked down and Mineta cowered behind him that they were the culprits, but the ash blond couldn’t even assume anything before the class ratted them out.

“(L/n)-chan was on her period and these two idiots threw her in the pool!” Mina exclaimed, everyone nodding in agreement.

Bakugou’s vermillion eyes flicked over to the two, a new level of darkness radiating off him at the news. He knew they were idiots, but this? This was a whole other level of stupid, especially to pull on his very own (s/o).”

“You better hope and pray these idiots are lying.” Bakugou growled lowly, palms cracking as he slowly began to stride towards them.

“H..Hey they were all in on it too!” Mineta shouted pointing to the class before glaring to them all, “Don’t you throw us under the bus you jerks!”

“B..Bakugou I swear I didn’t know she was on her period!” Kaminari pleaded, feeling as if the devil himself were walking towards him, “You know I would never do that to (L/n) bro!”

Bakugou simply ignored their pleads, any noise except the absolute rage fuming through his mind was drowned out.

“Too late for that you shit eating fuckers, you crossed the line when the idea of even looking at my girlfriend entered your mind, let alone touching her.”

Kirishima thought about stopping his friend, after all he was Kaminari and Mineta’s last chance at survival at this point. But if what Mina said was true?

The two idiots deserved it.

---

For hours you stared into your reflection in the mirror, disgusted with yourself, your uterus, and the entire night.

What had you done? You should have just told your friends the truth before hand. Or you should have just not gone at all! Bakugou probably would’ve preferred to of not gone anyway.

Now he was probably sitting at the now awkward party miserable because you weren’t there and you had killed the entire party.

Usually you never made a big deal about anything like this. You hated crying in front of other people. You hated being dramatic. Maybe it was just your horomones making you emotional, but you felt like a mess.

You were more than thankful it was the start of spring break, thinking about having to see your classmates on Monday made you feel as if you were going to vomit.

Letting out a sigh you combed your fingers through your damp hair from the shower and slapped it up into a bun so you could take all the makeup off your face.

At least now you could cleanse yourself from tonight’s memories. You always loved the end of the day, you could take off your uniform and makeup and let your hair loose and just relax.

Slipping the towel off from around your chest you grabbed your soft t-shirt you stole from Bakugou a few months ago and slipped it over your head before tugging up a pair of soft shorts to match.

Thankfully most of Bakugou’s clothes were black so it wasn’t too hard to find matching clothing items to go along with it.

Though you still felt miserable on the inside, you at least felt comfortable on the outside. Letting out one last sigh you moved to switch the bathroom light off in your dorm until you heard a loud pound on your door.

Your first thought was one of your friends had come over to check on you, but you had that exact pounding against your wooden door memorized in your head. Bakugou Katsuki stood on the other side of that door.

Biting your lip you worriedly looked into the mirror, noticing your eyes clearly red and puffy. There was no trying to lie your way out of that. There was no way he could see you like this.

“Go away Bakugou, I want to be alone!”

At first you heard silence and actually thought he left. Letting out a relieved sigh you switched the bathroom light off and walked out of your bathroom only to hear a string of mumbled profanities.

“Fucking damnit (F/n)...” You could hear Bakugou mutter, the sound of rustling around heard from the other side until the door swung wide open, “You’re an idiot, I know you never lock your damn door you moro...”

Bakugou at first walked in without even sparing a glance at you, trying to balance his bag in one hand and the takeout food in the other while closing the door. He hadn’t looked up until he was halfway through scolding you and immediately stopped at the sight.

Even from across the room with the dim lighting, your puffy cheeks and red eyes practically glowed in the dark. You stood almost lifeless, your arms lazily at your sides as his t-shirt pretty much engulfed your entire small frame. The moment your eyes locked he noticed the quiver over your lower lip, knowing exactly what was going to happen next as your eyes began to gloss over.

“K..Katsuki..”

The very sound of his voice made his heart shatter. Of course he would never know what it was like to be on a period, but for you who has never cried a public a day in their life? You had to of been humiliated.

As soon as a tear fell down your cheek he winced slightly, reminding himself to beat up Kaminari and Mineta one last time. The instinct to clench his fists and grit his teeth were almost automatic, but he knew you didn’t need his angry self right now. You needed your good boyfriend right now.

“C’mere shitty girl.” Bakugou muttered softly, opening up his arms just enough for you to shuffle over to him and crash into his body.

You desperately clung onto him as you sobbed, digging your fingers into his shirt not even noticing how the cotton fabric shriveled at your grip due to the now dampness of it.

“T..They didn’t mean to...” You cried, slightly wiping your face against his shirt before turning your head to the side just enough so you could breath, “I..I didn’t tell them I w..was on my period, then they just threw me in..”

Bakugou grit his teeth at the sound of this, he couldn’t even help it.

You thought this was your fault.

“That didn’t give them the right to lay their fucking hands on you (F/n).” Bakugou hissed as calmly as he could, his hands holding you close against his body in his own way of comforting you.

Eventually you began to calm down, your loud hiccups quieting down and your breathing beginning to grow slower. Your fingers merely rested on his chest now instead of squeezing the fabric of his poor shirt.

“They all saw me cry... I must’ve looked like such a cry baby,” You mumbled, letting out a sigh as you buried your face in his shirt once more, “And I’m sure they all saw the stupid blood dripping down my legs...”

The ash blond could feel you getting worked up again, but there was no way in hell he was going to let you reopen up this wound, that’s what he was here for.

“Oi, stop that.” Bakugou commanded, his hand pushing against the top of your head to make you look up to him, his fingers now combing through the top of your hair to meet your bun, “Those idiots would feel shitty as hell too if they experienced what you did, there’s no reason to feel ashamed of having fucking emotions.”

At this you scoffed lightly, rolling your eyes, “You’re one to talk.”

Bakugou visibly and audibly pouted at this, his mouth dropping causing a small giggle to escape your lips.

The ash blond couldn’t even hide his small smile at the sound of your laugh, it was about damn time.

“This ain’t about me princess, I’ll leave now if you want me to.”

Quickly you held onto his shirt and shook your head with wide eyes, his smirk reappearing back on his face before he cupped the side of your face.

“Stop overthinking everything, you hear me? Nobody thinks you’re a crybaby or dramatic, in fact they’re all pretty pissed at Kaminari and Mineta because what they did is fucking wrong. You can’t help that you were the victim to their idiocracy, you hear me?”

Sniffling softly you battered your eyes up to him, looking at your boyfriend through your thick lashes as a small smile graced your face while you nodded your head.

Bakugou was more with satisfied with your response, he could only pray you couldn’t hear his heart beating insanely fast when he saw your angelic like smile grace your perfect lips.

Moving in slowly he placed a soft, or at least as soft as Bakugou can get, kiss on your lips. You happily obliged to the kiss, leaning in as well to press your own firmly against his.

Unlike your usual kisses, the two of you broke away fairly soon to savor the sweet moment you had together. It wasn’t that you never had sweet moments together, it’s just with Bakugou, he rarely showed this soft of a side. Any time he was willing to give it to you, you made sure to take advantage of it.

Smiling up to the ash blond, you moved the back of your hand to your eye to rub the itchiness away, sniffling one last time before your eyes flicked away from Bakugou’s to the good smelling food behind him.

“I..Is that? (Favorite Food)?”

“Yeah and you better be fucking grateful because the line was ten fucking centuries long.” Bakugou growled, being forced to remember the dreadful restaurant.

A large smile appeared on your lips now, your arms wrapping around his to give him a quick peck on the cheek before skipping to your food.

“Geez why do you seem more happy to see the food than you were to see me?” Bakugou grumbled, letting you take out both your meals and prepare them on your bed.

Grabbing the two to go boxes you shuffled over to your bed and sat beside him handing him his box, “Because I am more happy about the food.”

“Hah?!”

Once again you bursted into giggles, falling over on your side now at his dramatic reaction. Bakugou himself couldn’t even help but chuckle at your goofy laugh, shoving the boxes aside as he towered over you and straddled your hips.

“You think you’re so fucking funny huh shitty girl?” Bakugou hissed threateningly, “I’ll give you a reason to laugh...”

Your eyes blinked up to his, a few giggles still escaping your lips until his hands collided with your stomach. The once soft giggles you had switched into loud shrieks of laughter as you attempted to shrivel up from his tickle attack.

“Ka..Katsu... Stop Katsuki!” You shrieked, using your arms to cover up what you could of your stomach as you gasped for air.

The ash blond didn’t stop until he was content with your cherry read face and desperate gasps for air. Ending his merciless attack, he leaned down and place a quick kiss on your lips before smirking down to you.

“Still want to tease me princess?”

Pouting your lip out adorably in annoyance, you tugged at his neck and brought him down so you could hide your face in the side of his neck causing him to chuckle.

His body lowered beside you as he wrapped his arms around your form and pulled you up against him.

It was crazy to you how just a few minutes ago you felt like you never wanted to go outside ever again, now you felt you take the world on with Bakugou at your side. He had such a crazy affect on you... honestly you weren’t sure what you would do without him.

Bakugou was just about to sit up to start eating the food with you, that is until he heard a sniffle from beside him. Raising an eyebrow he sat up on his elbow and leaned over you to see new tears rolling down your face.

“The hell is wrong with you now?”

Attempting to wipe at your sloppy tears you failed to prevent the quiet hiccup that flew past your lips before looking back up at him, “Y..You’re just such a g..good boyfriend and I.. I... I love you so much!”

Now it was Bakugou’s turn to have a red face. His cheeks pretty much matched his eyes as he quickly buried his face into your chest to hide the smile that flashed across his lips.

“You shut up with that mushy stuff, you hear me shitty girl?”

To anyone else they would’ve been offended with Bakugou’s reaction, but you knew exactly what his words and actions meant. And they were plenty enough for you.

Letting out a content sigh you nuzzled yourself into his side, deciding the food could wait for a quick cuddle session.

It wasn’t even five minutes though before you fell asleep in his arms. Bakugou couldn’t help but laugh as you clung to him like a koala to a tree. Shutting the boxes of food with his free hand, the ash blond moved them to the floor before positioning you even with the pillows on your bed.

Keeping one arm linked around you, Bakugou pulled you close and placed a gentle kiss on your lips. One he would never dare give you while conscious. The soft kiss followed by words he would never say while you were conscious until the day he falls before you on one knee.

“I love you too (F/n).”

---

Headcannon Ending :-)

-The next morning you wake up feeling refreshed and end up decicind to have breakfast with your friends along with Bakugou

-You’re met with your other classmates all awaiting for you downstairs. Everyone apologizes at once, Kaminari and Mineta in the front

-For a second you though Bakuogu had forced them all to do this, but when you looked up to him he looked just as confused as you.

-“I’m sorry for throwing you in the pool (L/n), that wasn’t cool of me to not respect your boundaries!” Kaminari exclaimed before bowing to you along with Mineta

-Simply smiling calmly you waved him off, saying it was okay

-“No it’s not, and to make it up I’ll let you punch me anywhere you want!”

-Mineta was not on board with this, but you still smile scarily calmly which made most students uneasy

-”Oh thank goodness, I was hoping you would say that because I was really scared-”

-”Instead I’m going to shove you both in the pool.”

- :)  <--- your literal face while saying this

-Both are shocked but Kaminari eventually nods his head and defeat, admitting he deserves it.

-Mineta on the other hand refuses, saying he does not deserve to get humiliated like that

-”Katsuki~”

-Demon boy is already behind you with smirk powerful enough to make the devil himself pee his pants

-It’s swimming time bois

-Kaminari walks on his own while Bakugou his holding a screaming Mineta by the ankle

-If you think the entire class isn’t going to watch and record this, you’re incredibly wrong

-”Kaminari first!” You say with a grin, the blond boy begrudginly walking up to the edge before turning back to you.

-”Promise you’ll forgive me after this?”

“Of course! Now turn around.”

-After he slowly turns around your foot collides with his back and shoves him in the water, the blond shrieking in surprise as he’s plummeted to his water defeat

-Mineta is now crying in terror at this point

-”Here’s the best for last princess.” Bakugou says, handing over the flailing grape boy.

-Pondering over it, you shake your head and smile to your boyfriend, “I’ll actually let you do the honors of blasting him across the pool.”

-”What?!”

-Bakugou’s “What?!” sounds excited as he smirks wickedly. The class’ “What?!” is out of shock, pity, and excitement. Mineta’s “What?!” is out of pure fear, as it should.

-Cue Sparky Sparky Boom Man popping a cap in Mineta’s ass and launching the grape boy across the pool

-Whatever pants the little dude was wearing have perished

-Feeling satisfied you hug your boyfriend, both soaking up the cheering from your class and finally feeling better about the whole situation.

                                                      𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓔𝓷𝓭