#honestly at this point i should start collecting gum

[coldcasescenario]

i did really well today until just now...

i only had half of a finn crisp cracker (so like 10 cals), a celsius (10 cals), and a sugar free coffee with coconut milk (another 10 cals) so i was in a really good spot....but then i binged and had half an apple w 2 tbsp of peanut butter UGH peanut butter is NOT a safe food but its so yummy w apples....like how tf its 180 cals for 2 tbsp??? im so annoyed at myself rn...but if i just keep drinking water and my iced coffee the rest of today i should hopefully steer away any more cravings....i was 170 on the scale this better not have messed that up..i wanna be in the 160s at least to be on track for 140 by graduation

[elderwisp]

◁ || ▷ now playing

Frances: Look, I’m sorry about my friends. I swear, they aren’t that weird all the time. Well… 

Icarus: [ chuckles ] It’s fine. They seem to care about you a great bunch. 

Frances: I honestly think they would take a bullet for me. I’d do the same for them.

Icarus: That’s good though, I’m glad you have people looking out for you.

Frances: Would you say the same for your friends?

Icarus: Yeah, I think so. This your room?

Frances: Mhm. You can come in.

Icarus: You sure?

Frances: Or we can talk right here. Although I imagine you’re gonna get a bit tired of the drunk people running into the door.

Icarus: [ small laugh ] Good point. You like to collect a lot of things. Is this a rock?

Frances: A geode, I think if I wasn’t a music major, I’d probably be a geologist. 

Icarus: You could always study for another four years.

Frances: Pfft. Absolutely not. I never want to buy another textbook again. 

Icarus: Are you excited for what comes next?

Frances: Actually, about that. I need to talk to you about something.

Icarus: Is it bad?

Frances: Sort of.

Icarus: Then we can talk about it another time. We’re celebrating.

Frances: Icarus…

Icarus: You gonna deny me that?

Frances: [ shakes head ]

Icarus: Good. 

-

Dan: Oye pendejo! Where are you going with my alcohol?!

Ares: JESUS!

Dan: It’s okay I know him. Pues?!

Atlas: No te preocupes, vamos a divertirnos! Mwah! / Don't worry, we're going to have fun!

Dan: [ grumbles ] That fucker.

Ares: Context??

Dan: He literally always does this. He always steals my alcohol!

Ares: You should beat him up.

Dan: I should- Why are you encouraging me?

Ares: I dunno. Feelin’ evil I guess. Got a light?

Dan: Now what the hell is up with you not having a lighter? 

Ares: I do! I just never refill it. 

Dan: I don’t even think said lighter is in the room with us.

Ares: You know there are some things I’m allowed to not be put together with and this is one of them. 

Dan: Here. Keep it.

Ares: I am not keeping your things.

Dan: You sayin’ there’s something wrong with it?

Ares: I’m not doing this with you.

Dan: Oh so you hate me.

Ares: Yep, I guess I do.

Gabriel: Dan! Now why the hell were there two people making out in the entrance? 

Dan: They’re still doing that?

Gabriel: I mean good for them but like… Get outta my way, you know?

Dan: Pfft! Thank you for coming! 

Gabriel: Of course! I brought a bottle of wine but Gum took it. 

Ares: Gum’s here? And she’s alone?

Gabriel: She’s fine. Knows exactly where I’m at, besides something caught her eye. 

-

Frances: You’ve been practicing.

Icarus: I have a great teacher.

Frances: Man, I’m gonna miss this.

Icarus: Sit. I know you’re scared that things are changing.

Frances: Icarus, I need to-

Icarus: I’d like it if you enjoyed this moment with me. Please?

Frances: Okay.

Icarus: When do you leave?

Frances: First week of July. God, leave it to the universe to cosmically fuck up my life.

Icarus: Not even! 

Frances: I mean is it selfish for me to be a tad bit unhappy? Everything I’ve worked for, built up to this very moment and it’s not enough. 

Icarus: Sometimes expectations are just that. A lead up to disappointment. 

Frances: I’m sorry, I’m being so negative right now. We were having a moment and I started to ramble.

Icarus: Don’t apologize. From the time I’ve known you, I can see you’re a bit of an overthinker but! Before you give me that look, it isn’t a bad thing.

Frances: It isn’t bad… It’s horrible.

Icarus: [ chuckles ] Stop it! You like to see things in every perspective and it’s endearing. 

Frances: Said the only person ever.

Icarus: Why are you so keen on giving me a hard time?

Frances: Why not? I think you like it.

Icarus: I like a lot of things about you, Frances. Be here with me?

Frances: Even if it breaks my heart?

Icarus: At least you won’t be alone in that.

[nogenderbee]

♡˗ˏ✎*ೃ˚ 𝕊𝕖𝕔𝕣𝕖𝕥 𝕊𝕒𝕟𝕥𝕒 ₊˚ˑ༄

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ @bleachtheidiot

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

Inazuma had a Christmas event of "Secret Santa"! It was actually nice and since you knew most people on the city more or less... you decided to give it a chance!

You thought it would be easy but that's when you saw a name of person that expectations may be hard to meet... Arataki Itto...

You already asked Kuki for help, and she suggested you should probably go for like super strong onikabuto or just some sweets if you won't be able to find it... But sweets just sounded... blunt... So you made it your mission to find stronger onikabuto than his current one!

You began going out more often and even begging passing players to give you tips onto how collect stronger ones. And you discovered... it's almost impossible... You mostly win or train your own onikabuto...

You were honestly at the verge of giving up when amazing news hit your ears! Some professional duelist was retiring and giving away his onikabutos... you were eyeing the strongest one but so were many others...

The nickname you chose for yourself was first letter of your name... You managed to already have few onikabutos collected so surprisingly, you got quite far!

When you weren't fighting for the main goal... you were competing with other duelist to upgrade your onikabutos! And your determination seemed to pay off because you got to the final round~ It was fully anonymous though so you could only stand outside hoping it's your onikabuto who wins...

"Ladies and gentleman's... our competition came to an end!"

MC's voice loudly announced as you and many others waited impatiently to learn who won the final round...

"And the winner is... AI anon!!"

You honestly crumbled when you discovered that all of your trying went to waste... You swore you could even hear Itto's cheer in the crowd, you were so in disbelief right now...

"(I guess... I have to settle for sweets in the end...)"

The day of revealing your Secret Santa finally came... Everyone was excited but you? You were ashamed to show your gift was just... some sweets...

You walked to the centre and looked around for Itto... But before you could even notice, you felt a hand on your back and heard energetic voice behind you.

"Hey hey! I was looking everywhere for you!"

Looking back... you noticed it's Itto himself! Seems he found you before you could even find HIM!

Though he was holding out a package to you... Box with very few holes, messily yet... decorated... it was clear he tried to decorate it aesthetically!

"What's this-"

"I saw you getting into onikabuto dueling recently so I got you something for a good start!"

You hesitantly reached for the box, a bit surprised HE was your Secret Santa! You were about to explain and hand in your own present to him, when you felt something move in box you were given...

Your curiosity got the better of you and your hand went to slowly open the box, in which you saw... the very onikabuto you were fighting for...

"That- That's what I tried to win for you!"

"Why would you-? Aoooh! Wait we got each other?! That's so cool! What did you got me?"

He guessed on spot and... was clearly excited about it... even getting right to the point to discover what's in your gift... You honestly only felt worse when you saw his excitement, knowing that it's just some sweets...

You slowly moved gift towards him, a bit hesitant to give it to him in the end... Yet he seemed to not care or even notice what as he quickly snatched the gift that was meant for him. He opened it eagerly and stopped the second he saw what's inside...

"Oh..."

The guilt got the better of you and you turned into a rambling mess...

"I'm sorry! I really wanted to get you something better but then I failed and ran out of time and I couldn't find anything meaningful so I-"

"You got me gum berries?! I was craving for them since morning! You're a lifesaver!!"

"What-"

Before you could question him even more, he pulled you into a big bear hug, showing how grateful he is for your gift! Despite you thinking it's bad, it was quite the opposite for him~

"I hope next hear you'll be my Secret Santa too!"

"Heh... yeah... me too..."

You smiles gently to yourself at the situation you ended up in, kinda grateful for his reassuring words~

"(I promise to get you strongest onikabuto next year~ No matter how hard it'll be...)"

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

ᴄʜᴇᴄᴋ 2024 ᴀᴅᴠᴇɴᴛ ᴄᴀʟᴇɴᴅᴀʀ

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #095

(taken december 29th last year; uploading surveys taken while gone)

Have you ever given someone flowers? Yes; I remember one specific Mother's Day I took a jar and went walking down our path collecting wild flowers to give my mom. I'm also pretty sure I've given Jason roses before, but I'm not entirely positive. I want to give Girt some someday, even though he's said he thinks flowers are kinda a dumb gift, since they're just dying plants and all but honestly, I feel like if someone he loves like me actually gifted him flowers that he'd probably be really touched and cherish them.

Are there any lamps on in the room that you’re currently in? Yes, I have a guitar lamp in this room that's always on because I like its warm, orange glow.

Is there a place that you will never return back to? I've made it a point that I simply will fucking not EVER go back to the local mental hospital here if god absolutely forbid I need one again. I'll die before I do. It's literal hell and pure, rancid garbage of a facility.

Does your grass need to be cut currently? Nah, it naturally stays dead/real short this time of year.

What’s the worst thing that’s ever happened to you? A very abrupt and just overall traumatic breakup with a long-time partner I'd completely, utterly, entirely lost myself in. I had no self-autonomy; I lived for him, and suddenly he was gone, so I lived for nobody until I finally started to build myself and decide who I was in 2017. It's a journey still in progress today, because I still don't feel like I've entirely found myself and I definitely don't love myself like I should at all. I would wish the experience on absolutely, positively nobody. It changed me forever.

Would you ever want to get married? If so, why? Yes; the primary reason is I just really like the symbolism and general drive to always be and work together, but I also find it appealing for legal and financial ease when it comes to various processes.

Have you ever abused an animal? Hell fucking no.

Do you think animals are less important than humans? If so, why? Nope. They have just as much right to life and kindness as humans do, and you cannot change my mind. We came about existence and (varying degrees of) sentience the same way they did, so what the hell makes us better? And hey, at least animals don't consciously make evil decisions like we do...

Have you ever been sectioned? I am honestly STUNNED I haven't even HEARD this phrase before I just googled it, because I've been admitted to psych hospitals many times. The term "involuntary commitment" was used instead.

Are you on any medication? I'm on so many meds, and I hate it. I very much hold just how many meds I have been and also am still on as being responsible for my extreme memory problems. They're also why I have tremors in my hands. And why I have a chronically Sahara-dry mouth, like I'm supposed to carry a moistening spray for my mouth with me as instructed by my dentist because just how horribly dry my mouth is actually contributed to cavities in very difficult locations, like around the gum line and in difficult cracks.

Have you ever been homeless? Technically, yes, but I have Colleen to thank for ensuring I had some place to stay during this time. She, in her core, was not a very good person, but bad people are still capable of doing nice things. People are absolutely not merely black and white.

Have you ever had a steady job? Nope. Just three humiliating, very short-lived attempts.

Have you ever wanted to go to space? I absolutely would if it wasn't such a long, daunting journey. I feel like I would ultimately and very easily just cry if I went to and truly experienced outer space. That's the home of our very genesis, like I don't think anybody WOULDN'T cry.

Do you identify as a geek? If so, explain. Eh I guess so, I've definitely got my geeky interests and aesthetics and stuff, but I ultimately just don't care about labels and whether I fit them or not at this age.

What has been the most exciting moment of your life thus far? Markiplier acknowledging my existence lmfao

Do you have a dog that is destructive? Nah, Cookie's totally harmless.

Does your mom like to burn candles? Oh yes, she's big on Yankee candles.

Where’s the weirdest place you’ve ever slept? Zero clue. Nowhere very odd, I'm sure.

Quick! Chinese or Mexican? Mexican, I guess, but I'm not big on either.

How many significant others have you had in your WHOLE life? I only consider three TRULY significant. I uh, think. What I had with Sara was nowhere near what I felt/feel for Jason and Girt, but it was still significant to me.

When was the last time you applied chapstick? Not long ago, actually. It's been every day for like a week or two now... They're just constantly burning and the top lip has a notably red shade above it.

All the people you’ve kissed, what did their names start with? J, T, D (or "G" if you go by what I call him), and S.

What did you and your ex fight about most? Jason and I I'm pretty sure fought most about instances where games came before me. I think. This was just so long ago that our old fights barely exist in my head now. Sara and I mostly argued about RP stuff, which is so fucking stupid and is just a reminder to me of how not worth it that friendship was, we could never agree on shit, shit that wasn't even real.

Have you ever purchased condoms? I personally haven't, no.

What brand is your camera? It's a Canon EOS Rebel T6.

Do you like raisins? I absolutely hate raisins.

When did you first kiss the last person you kissed? It was the first time he visited my house after we started dating the first time. As we were hugging before he left, he like shyly mentioned he wanted to but clearly wanted my permission, which I gave him even though at this time, I was not ready. No fault of his own, he was mannerly and considerate in seeing if I was okay with it and I SAID yes, so it's my own fault. Obviously doesn't bother me nowadays though.

Have you ever gone on vacation with your boyfriend/girlfriend? No, but that'd be super nice one day.

Would you rather be able to talk to animals or be fluent in every language? Talk to animals. I feel like it would ultimately be more beneficial, like others could translate my English, speaking to animals would be a major new thing.

What was the last thing someone asked you for advice on? Uhhhh... I can't remember.

What are some things that make others cry, that don’t make you cry at all? There is honestly probably nothing. I cry very easily.

Have you ever swam in a saltwater pool? No, and I'm cool with never doing that.

List three people you’ve had crushes on. I'm only gonna list people I never dated: Sebastian, Kyle, and Alon.

How old were you when you were first head over heels in love? 16, 17.

List three people you had a hard time forgiving. Jason, Dad, Colleen.

Is there someone you are currently struggling to forgive? I don't think "struggling" is the right word, I straight-up refuse to forgive Sara for invalidating my trauma. I could possibly forgive everything else, but not that. Never that.

[TW: EATING DISORDER, SIMILAR BEHAVIORS] Have you ever tried to starve yourself in order to lose weight? Yes, but it's never gone far. I handle the feeling of hunger quite badly, especially if I am super in need of food, so I've never been able to resist all that long.

If applicable, what form of birth control do you use? I use the Tri-Sprintec birth control pills, and condoms are mandatory for me. Maybe TMI but pulling out is also not merely an option, my partner is absolutely gonna fucking do it. I'm unwilling to do anything less than those three together.

What gender do you identify as? What gender were you born as? Female for both questions.

Have you ever gotten high off a prescription medication? No.

Do you prefer tampons or pads? Honestly, I hate both. Tampons are just uncomfortable and tend to just not stay perfectly in place for me, and pads are like bloody diapers, but ultimately I use pads these days anyway. I sometimes wanna try to use the cup, but I know I wouldn't handle it well for a few reasons.

Have you ever used a tampon? Yes, I think I've used tampons for most of my menstruating life. I only recently switched back to pads.

Did your parents give you “the talk”? No, I learned about periods and sex solely from family life/sex ed classes in school during 4th and 5th grade.

Do you think you are attractive? Absolutely not.

Have you ever accidentally overdosed on a drug? Yes actually, but it just made me very tired. Mom called poison control or whatever and they let us know I'd be fine, I probably just would be sleepy.

Would you ever name a child after yourself? No, I honestly REALLY dislike parents naming their children after themselves. It comes across as so self-important and like the child's identity isn't their own. I worry if I do have kids/a son, Girt's mom is absolutely going to want a Donald III which she will absolutely, positively NOT get. I don't even like the name Donald.

Is there a guy or girl you wish things had worked out with? Not anymore!

Would you rather have a daughter or a son? I would very strongly prefer a daughter if I have children.

Have you ever written to an advice columnist? No.

If you’re female, would you feel uncomfortable having a male gynecologist? Yes, I would literally refuse a male gynecologist, like I'm sorry, but a man picking a career of examining vaginas and pretending it's not something he gets some sort of sexual satisfaction out of seems REMARKABLY unlikely to me.

Do you like Lisa Frank? Yeah, I really enjoy her aesthetic. Kinda want a Lisa Frank-ish tattoo at some point.

Were you ever hospitalized as a child? No.

Do you believe that drug addicts and alcoholics should count as people? Are you fucking kidding me with this????

Will you vote in the next presidential election? Yes.

What’s your favorite zoo animal? Meerkats! Even though my zoo no longer has them. :(

Are you allergic to your favorite animal? I wouldn't know, I've never been in contact with one.

Did you ever have to take home a fake baby in health class? No, thank fucking GOD.

Would you rather wear ivory or white on your wedding day? What color will your bridesmaids wear? Well, I most want to wear black, but if that wasn't an option, uh... idk, it would really depend on the dress. I think my bridesmaids are gonna wear orange; I want a black-and-gold themed wedding and I think orange would work okay. I think gold dresses would either be very expensive or just distracting, or both.

Have you ever taken a poetry course? No, but I absolutely would've if it was an option in school.

What would you name twin girls? I can basically promise you I would selectively abort if I got pregnant with twins even if I wanted children, BUT if I did keep both for whatever reason, I'm rather confident in Alessandra and Anneliese.

Are you named after anyone? No. Well, my middle name is frequently used as a middle name in my family, if you'd consider that as counting.

Do you want to have a bachelorette party? Idk, probably.

Would you be scared to meet God? My totally honest, rather confident opinion? Even if he existed, no. Because if he IS real, I have a negative amount of respect for him so therefore don't respect anything he'd think or feel. The idea of going to Hell is terrifying, yeah, but even that fear won't keep me from what I so firmly believe in these days.

Have you ever questioned God’s existence? Story of basically my entire life.

Is there a Kmart in your town? There once was quite close to here actually, but it's been closed for a veeeery long time now.

Do you enjoy seeing wedding and baby announcements on Facebook? Of course! Those are exciting times for people and I'm happy for them.

What would you say if you found out your last ex was in a relationship? I wouldn't say anything, idc.

Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? When it boils down to it, no. I want to keep moving forward.

[captainaikus]

THOSE NICKNAMES ARE SO CUTE ABKGCFBHGG ofc you can call me either one you pick 😊. Also I hope that guy gets gum stuck in his horrible hair and is super late to an exam or something 😤😤😤. I don’t understand how some people think I want to hear their stupid comments?? Like whatever happened to the saying “if it’s not nice, don’t say it”?? Like unless we’re friends or close constructive criticism or advice is fine. But like. I haven’t seen you since school? Leave me alone. Some peoples audacity I swear 🤨🙄😤. Im sorry that that happened to you. AND YOU TELL HIM. MANS THOUGHT HE WAS CHANGING THE WORLD BY BEING RUDE TO YOU AND PROCEEDS TO LOSE A DEBATE AGAINST YOU NOT EVEN MINUTES LATER. HECK YEAH. YOU GO GIRL 😤🥰. Intelligence is so freaking hot though just saying. So like. Love everything about yourself cause there’s so much to love sweetheart ❤️❤️❤️. Also like I’m slowly falling for Nagi and Oliver but we’re not gonna talk abt that rn 👀 *swears profusely* Also also I love love love knowing random facts about all my favorite characters because it just makes them seem so real. It’s just overall really adorable. Like that invincible hero hates ranch with a burning passion and that one tired teacher loves swimming in coral reefs in their down time and that one amazing soccer player loves history. Finding out more stuff about all these awesome characters honestly makes me love them even more. Going to the gym is great btw!!! But don’t forget to also rest and not overdo it. Your body needs time to repair itself yknow? I seriously need to start going again. I was a gym rat the entire summer and I actually liked it?? I wanted to try something new and I ended up loving it. Idk it’s just the satisfaction of working on yourself and working all those feelings out and just taking care of your body yknow? But school got in the way and I keep telling myself I’ll go this weekend but I keep forgetting 💀😭. I shall add Romantic Killer to my watch list ���. Is it an anime or a show btw? What’s it about? *sips from hot chocolate cup and hugs squishmallow* I’m still processing the ending of TR so like I need a couple business days to collect my thoughts but you’ll be the first to hear them when it hits me that it’s actually over. Also Isabelle is such a pretty name. I think it suits you 😊. As always I hope your day goes well!! *sends virtual hugs*

- ✨ anon

forget to add on my last ask agjhhhshehh 💀 but why those specific nicknames? like is it cause if the emoji or something else? sorry im just curious 😅.

I'm that kind of person who keeps nicknames for everyone actually... based on what they like or reminds me of irl has a friend named dumbface . And the thing is... the word 'anon' sounds... mechanical which is why I offer emojis to people who want to interact with me and visit my blog and everytime I look at ✨ emoji all I'm thinking of is a genshin wish or starry or charm and I literally go like

'starry asked me something!! *smiles*' But yeah cause of the emoji or in case send me a name that you'd like be called by? ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა

Thinking if I should call 💙  anon blue...

Going back to my classmate at uni... another bonus point is that since we hadn't seen each other in a long time; with covid and all that too I'm...actually two heads taller than him. And when he tried to be rude to me again today- this time about my hair cause its short (and yk what guys say abt girls with short hair right?), I said 'You talk big for someone who has to be noticed under a microscope, you wanna lose another debate?' And he actually shut up with his mouth open and a friend of mine who shares the second major class with him just laughed

Oyaoya you're falling for Nagi and Oliver ( ⓛ ω ⓛ ) Tell me all about it

I know !! ૮꒰⸝⸝> ̫ <⸝⸝꒱ა The random facts about Oliver made me go 'No way. NO. WAY. WHAT.' cause there are too many things about me that coincide with him and I was just sitting there like... it does makes sense now. Cause when i was reading the manga too, I saw him and I went like... he gives me the vibe of a snake (cause I had a pet one and there's a whole history to that and it was guesswork) for some reason. *scrolls*

it's a snake alright.

Random facts just make my day and I love the fact of that one tired teacher who likes swimming in the coral reefs - pretty sure Ego is that kind of guy. When I found out that Aiku loves History I was like 'is it possible to fall any deeper for this man?'

So the thing with gym is that I was going for a good week and then i fell sick. and it kept happening back and forth until I got tired and irritated and said that i need to be consistent. And honestly? I love going to the place as well ! Plus I needed to get more muscle in cause... I wanna be able to lift more heavy objects. So me and my roommate were lifting this really heavy box and I couldn't get it over my head and nearly busted my skull but luckily they're stronger and taller than me so I was safe; I don't want to experience that again and that's why i decided to go to the gym. that and for mental stability and being fit as well ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ

My classes do get in the way of me going to gym and studies take up my time too and that's why i balance everything. Priorities take first place, write little everyday and when its ready, I post it.

So Romantic killer is an anime about a girl who cares only about three things : gaming, her cat and chocolate. And cause of that, she's disconnected from the real world and can't fall in love with anyone the way i've been called out on with this show so a wizard who made an otome video game comes (their name is riri), and tries to set her up with this guy named Kazuki. And its all about her resisting him

His voice sounds very familiar though *goes to check* yeup, Kamitani Hayato from Gakuen babysitter club and weather report from JJBA

I just heard about TR from one of my friends. And I'm surprised abt it actually, maybe I should read from where i left off (forgot to ask about terano south) but take your time. I'll be there to hear all about it ૮(˶˃ᆺ˂˶)ა

My name... has taken one too many dad jokes, comes with being the youngest ig . DoorBELLE BELLEring

Not to mention the spellings and older people, ‘Isabella’ no, it’s Isabelle, Isabel? Izabel? No, Isabelle

Oliver : Tinker belle.

That is acceptable.

*sending warm hugs*

[writtenmemxries]

“If I could read your mind, love, what a tale your thoughts could tell.”

I was inspired by this post by @gum-believable to write this fic. I tagged all the people that asked to be tagged under that post, I hope you don’t mind and I hope you like this! :)

[1.9k words]

Sam had learned early on that many hunts rarely go as one would hope, unfortunately. He used to wait anxiously for his father and brother to come home, sitting on an uncomfortable bed in a random motel, nearly thirty years before, scared that things could go bad.

As time went by, he understood firsthand that not everything always goes as planned. Murphy’s law teaches us that anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. Even on a trivial hunt like that.

A case to solve, a witch to stop before it was too late, people to save. Nothing they hadn’t faced before, nothing they weren’t able to overcome with their skills and experience. It was such a mundane hunt that even a pair of young hunters like Claire and Kaia could have handled it well, or so Sam and Dean believed.

Alas, hunting is unpredictable. Who would have thought that the witch had a twin sister? Who would have imagined that the aforementioned sister was so poorly endowed with magical powers that the spell cast against Dean would have side effects even after her death?

Still, that was exactly what happened.

When a purple cloud enveloped Dean’s head, dulling his senses and making him lose his balance, Sam shot the young woman in the head and she fell to the ground with a thud.

Dean, still a bit pale, got up trembling. Despite everything, he seemed to be fine. No trace of purple smoke, no strange dust, no visible wounds. They were both fine.

Sam let out a relieved sigh. That was a close one, he thought.

“Amen to that, little brother,” Dean said with a smirk.

Sam looked at him confused. “I didn’t say anything.”

Dean frowned. “What do you mean, you just talked!”

“Dean, I didn’t speak.”

Dean thought about it for a moment, then shrugged carelessly. “I must have imagined it. I still feel a little dizzy from the spell.”

Sam nodded. “Can you drive?”

“Of course I can, who do you think I am? You won't put your filthy hands on Baby,” Dean exclaimed offended, and quickly went down the stairs of the apartment.

Sam looked around cautiously one last time before following his brother to the car.

As they traveled through the city towards the highway, Sam stared out of the window thoughtfully, while Dean cheerfully drummed his fingers on the steering wheel.

That Starbucks is new, Sam thought casually, noticing a new sign of the popular coffee shop.

“Wow Samantha, you know these towns really well, don’t you?" Dean commented wryly.

Sam turned to him frowning. “What?”

“I said you know-”

“I heard what you said,” Sam interrupted him. “But why did you say that?”

Dean gave him a confused look before focusing back on the road. “Uh, no offense Sam, but honestly, who cares about Starbucks.”

Sam was starting to fret. “How do you know I was thinking about Starbucks?”

“You okay Sam?” Dean asked concerned. “Did those sons of bitches do anything to you?”

“I didn't say anything, Dean,” Sam said for the second time that day. “I just thought about it.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I didn't speak. And I didn't do it before, either! I didn't say anything about Starbucks, Dean. Not out loud at least.”

“So what, I can read minds now?”

Sam sighed. “I don't know, maybe.”

Dean smiled in amusement. “Awesome.”

“Dean, there must be something else. Something bad. It must be that spell's fault. I'm gonna call Cas.”

But Dean had stopped listening to him. He was smiling to himself, proud of his new supernatural power. After all, how dangerous could it be?

When they got to the bunker, Castiel was already there. Sam hadn't explained anything to him on the phone, except that Dean had been hit by an unknown spell and they needed the angel's help.

As soon as they entered the room, Castiel ran to meet them, worried.

“Sam, Dean. What happened?”

“Dean thinks he has superpowers,” Sam said without many pleasantries, as Dean greeted Castiel with a pat on the shoulder.

“I told you Sam, I'm like Professor X,” Dean said with a grin.

Castiel sighed, rolling his eyes.

Why did I have to fall in love with this idiot?

Dean nearly tripped over his own feet. Castiel grabbed his arm, steadying him, but Dean immediately drew back, as if his touch had burned him.

“What?!�� he nearly shouted, looking at him with wide eyes.

Castiel looked at him confused and preoccupied. “Dean, I didn't say anything,” he said calmly, as if he were explaining a complex concept to a child.

“Cas, the thing is-” Sam tried to explain, but Dean shut him up.

“It's- it's not important. Do you know what matters now? Dinner. I still have to cook, so, Cas, you're coming with me to the kitchen,” he said quickly. His ears were burning and he knew he was blushing.

“Dean-”

“No tofu-eating man allowed in my kitchen, capiche?” he interrupted his brother again, pointing his finger at him.

Then, without saying anything else, he grabbed Castiel by the wrist and they disappeared together down the corridor, leaving Sam astonished in front of the bunker entrance.

In the kitchen, Dean let go of Castiel's wrist, clearing his throat embarrassed. Castiel continued to look at him curiously.

I miss the feeling of his fingers on my skin. I love it when he touches me like that.

Dean choked on his saliva and started coughing under Castiel's concerned gaze.

“Dean, what happened, do I have to heal you?” he asked apprehensive.

Dean shook his head no, catching his breath. “No man, I'm fine. It's just... dinner, alright? We have to hurry up,” he said hastily, turning his back to the angel to avoid him noticing his obvious blush.

“Dean, Sam said a witch cast a spell on you...”

“Sam hit his head and has no idea what he's saying,” Dean lied.

Castiel frowned. “Is he okay? Maybe I should check if he needs my assistance,” he said, already heading down the hall.

“Cas, no!” Dean exclaimed.

Castiel winced, looking at him in shock.

Dean bit the inside of his cheek. “He's fine, I've already checked on him. He just needs to rest,” he said looking around, unable to fix his gaze on Castiel. “For now, I need you to stay here with me, okay?” he continued, grabbing a pan to cook some burgers.

Castiel tilted his head to the side, narrowing his eyes in confusion. “Why?”

“Because-” Dean sighed, “I want you here.”

Castiel's gaze softened.

I love being with you Dean. Spending time with you. Talking to you, or even being silent. I always want to be around you.

Dean felt himself blush again. “Good,” he murmured.

Castiel sat down at the table, knowing he couldn't be of much help, and he simply watched Dean cook. There was silence between them, but it wasn’t unpleasant. The only sounds were those that Dean made moving around the kitchen, slicing tomatoes, washing salad, preparing dinner.

How can I be so lucky?

Dean turned to Castiel, winking in his direction.

You're amazing. And it's incredible that I get to sit here, with you, watching you. Admiring you as one would admire a work of art or a natural phenomenon. Seeing you here, in such a normal and domestic environment, fills my heart with joy. I want to see you like this forever.

“So, Cas,” Dean said perhaps a little too loud, trying to distract himself from those words that were ringing in his head, hitting him right in the chest, unleashing lightning and storms inside his brain. “What's on your mind?”

Castiel eyed him enigmatically. “It's nice to see you cooking happily,” he said simply, looking around the kitchen.

“Uh, yeah, that's good, I guess,” Dean replied, scratching his head in embarrassment.

“What are you thinking about, instead, Dean?”

Dean looked into his eyes, which stared back at him with an expression so fond that he felt his heart ache.

I love you, he thought, and for the first time it didn't scare him. He didn't feel horrified, he hadn't been ashamed of his feelings for a long time. But he wasn't afraid either, not anymore.

I love you, he thought again. Cas, I love you. Cas cas cas cas-

“Dean.”

Castiel's cheeks were tinged with red, his lips were slightly parted, his pupils dilated. Dean's first thought was that he wanted to see him like that every day.

“Dean, why are you praying to me?” Castiel asked in a whisper.

“I'm not,” Dean said quietly, dumbfounded, letting his eyes wander over Castiel's features, his flustered face.

“Yes, you- you have-”

“I love you,” he blurted out.

Castiel closed his eyes, letting out a shaky breath.

Dean clung to the kitchen counter, already regretting having said it out loud. What if he wasn't actually hearing Cas' thoughts? What if he was just hallucinating?

“Say something Cas.”

Castiel shook his head slowly.

I don't deserve your love. You deserve better. You deserve someone who can give you a family, someone who can get old with you, someone who has never betrayed or hurt you, I don't-

“Cas. I- I can hear your thoughts. The witch's spell, I think... I don't even know man, I don't know what happened, but I can hear what you think as if you were talking,” Dean whispered guiltily.

Castiel jerked his head up. His eyes were full of tears.

“Dean, why haven't you told me-”

“I didn't want to. I'm sorry, okay, but you were saying all those nice things about me, things I don't deserve, and I didn't expect it. I just wanted... I don't know, man," Dean sighed, running a hand over his face. “But I love you,” he continued, moving closer to Castiel. “You’re family, Cas. You, Sam, Jack... I want to grow old with you, until I die of liver cirrhosis or some other bullshit. I don't want anyone else. It's you, Cas. You're the one for me.”

He had crouched down in front of Castiel, who was still sitting at the table. Tears ran down the angel's cheeks, which Dean promptly collected with his thumbs, gently caressing his face. Castiel huffed out a laugh, clinging to Dean's arms, clutching the fabric of his shirt.

He stood up, Dean right after him. And in an instant, their lips met and started moving together, in tune, as their hands explored the other's neck, jaw, hair, eagerly and sweetly at the same time.

They parted, out of breath, and Castiel rested his forehead against Dean's, losing himself in his green eyes.

“Should we thank her?” he asked with a smile, breathing in Dean’s scent.

“Who?” Dean said, stroking his hair absentmindedly.

“The witch.”

“Oh,” Dean chuckled. “Sam killed her.”

“Of course he did,” Castiel laughed.

“Yeah,” Dean muttered, and pulled him close to kiss him again.

Castiel smiled against his lips, and in that moment Dean was certain. He wanted this with him more than anything.

Smiling back, he wished Castiel would never stop grinning like that.

And if Castiel thought the same, Dean was too engrossed in the kiss to hear it.

· tags under the cut, ask to be added or removed ·

@rambleoncas @chaoticdean @winchester-novak @randomblabbling @seffersonjtarship @professorerudite @queen-rowenas @sana-drinks-isklar @tasersloth @beforejuko @superduckbatrebel 

@nguyenxtrang @destiel-bitches @multi-fandom-dark-lord @kindahotommo @cartoons-tothemoon @piratefairy-moonlight @legless-fish-on-rollerskates @hemdall

[narrators-journal]

A threat appears

So! This one I actually changed the title of this part, but otherwise, not much is different.

Cw: Illumi murders someone, I go into a bit of detail with it. Enjoy!

Previous part: here

First part: here

(f/n) was much more social than you, much more social. Which was a bit annoying to Illumi. Despite having achieved a potential wife...possibly...he wasn't sure, he still didn't like being pulled into a party (f/n) had gone to. But they weren't like you, helpfully isolated and reclusive. No, according to Milluki's research, they lived in a college dorm, so at least one person was around at night, which was the best time for hits so their room mate was quite the annoyance already, and during the day they regularly had friends around or were in class, in public, or otherwise surrounded by students and people of all sorts. Witnesses. So, the man had to once again slip into a social gathering and blend in to get to the person he wanted to kill. It brought back horrible memories of the hit he'd run into you on.

That's why he stood in some strangers living room, dressed in a baggy (college) sweater and some sweat pants, his long, black hair pulled up into a ponytail while faux sipping on a cup of cheap beer and watching while (f/n) danced to some random song he didn't know.

These rare moments where he actually needed to worm his way into social circles like this at least gave him a reason to dip into the small collection of 'casual' clothes he had, but that fact did little to actually make Illumi enjoy the need to listen to annoyingly loud drunk women, or sometimes assure an overly drunk college student that no, just because his hair was long and he wasn't built like some Dorito that did not mean he was a female or a lesser male. But, this was a nuisance he had to deal with. (f/n) had to learn that they couldn't set you up on dates, after all, you were far too reclusive to go on a date yourself, or go dragging you off to distant areas where the assassin couldn't protect you. You couldn't entertain him if you weren't somewhere he could watch you, now could you?

Luckily, Illumi being in sweatpants and a sweatshirt didn't kill the predatory charm he had, in fact, it seemed to increase his draw, judging by the fair number of party girls who tried to talk to him and lure him back to their dorms. (f/n) especially seemed prone to his charms, sauntering over, slightly tipsy, to flirt with him when they'd spotted the tall, handsome assassin standing against the wall.

They chatted for a while over the loud music while people around them danced, came and went from the house, or made out in the corner, then Illumi made his move,             "you want to maybe talk somewhere a bit quieter?" he suggested, letting his voice gain a tiny bit of suggestion to spark their interest. Of course, with the alcohol and abundance of lust coursing through their veins, they took the bait easily, nodding and grabbing his wrist to pull him outside to a more private, quiet part of the yard behind a small shed or whatever the host had in their yard.             "there anything you want to talk about in particular?" (f/n) asked, their own voice full of suggestion and flirtation.             "Nothing really, just wanted to do this," he hummed, swooping in and kissed them, making your friend squeak, but they didn't really hesitate to kiss back.

While Illumi struggled with love, empathy, compassion, so on, he did take some pride in the fact that he wasn't bad in the plainly intimate areas, (f/n) however he couldn't say was outright bad, but definitely not the best he'd had. their mouth tasted of beer and chewing gum, and their kisses were sloppy and uncoordinated, but he could compare and contrast the quality later, right now his main priority was breathing. He pulled away and gave a charming grin to (f/n) when they giggled,            "y'know, maybe we should head off to my dorm~" they hummed, twirling a finger in Illumi's long, silky hair. He hummed and made a show of thinking about it, in reality he knew instantly to agree, than nodded. (F/n) smiled at that and didn't hesitate to drag him back to their dorm. As he was dragged in, Illumi swiftly noticed that your friends room mate was gone. This situation couldn't be any more perfect, could it? And the assassin was happy to take advantage of the rare situation. Illumi kissed (f/n) again, letting them drag him onto their dorm bed and cling to him eagerly. He ignored how their fingers tangled in his hair, instead using the time to mull over how this situation wasn't awakening that primal need to breed that seemed to kick in over simply glimpsing your bare skin. Though, while his thoughts weren't super focused on the act he was partaking in, he still went through the basic motions with practiced ease, running his hands up and down their sides, kissing a trail down their neck, and than pulling their top over their head. Though he didn't toss it away. Instead, before (f/n) could strip his clothes off, he wrapped it around their throat and tightened it until your friends eyes widened and they gasped weakly. He knew better than to use his hands,  that risked getting him scratches on his hands, and leave DNA, so he was extra careful as he stared down at the person coldly. (f/n)'s eyes filled with a primal terror he'd seen many times before when he started strangling them, but Illumi was a trained murderer, (f/n) was a normal college student. When they started writhing and trying to claw at his arms it was easy for him to ignore the meager amounts of pain. Maybe they have a point though. he thought about his current victim's insistence to socialize you, simultaneously moving to straddle his victim better so they couldn't kick him or get free, Dates seem to be a far better option for learning about someone, and it'd be easier on my back than hiding in trees and shrubbery and sitting so still for long periods. He hummed absentmindedly, keeping (f/n)'s shirt tightly around their throat when they went still and tried to fake death to get free,                 "Smart move, but I know how long it takes to die of asphixiation." he told them calmly, which brought another struggle, this one far more primal and desperate, but he smoothly avoided all of their attempts to scratch his face, and his clothes kept them from clawing any DNA from his arms or legs, so despite their best efforts, even such vicious attacks didn't get them free. Eventually, they did truly suffocate, Illumi made sure by keeping the shirt taut for another full minute before loosening the fabric. After that, he simply disposed of the body in a nearby lake and went home. The next month was bland on your front. He couldn't really blame you completely for being so upset, you didn't know he was around to give you company, and your meager friend pool had shrunk by one, so he supposed your mental health was a bit at risk. It surely didn't help that Illumi had also made your date disappear like your friend, but he could help you through depression, and the lonelier you were, the better chances he had when he swept in and dated you. All he had to do was wait for the perfect time. Which was honestly boring.

[neesieiumz]

All The Stars {Tamaki Amajiki x Reader} - Chapter 5

Summary: Tamaki has been a sidekick at Fatgum’s agency for four years, going up in ranks and becoming Fatgum’s right-hand man. That’s when a transfer hero comes in, Y/n L/n. Born and raised in Southern America, Y/n comes to Japan for a fresh start and interviews and aces Fatgum’s interview. Partnered with Tamaki and Fatgum to get used to Japan, Tamaki finds her interesting, and can’t help the fact he wants to get to know her. As Y/n’s past slowly gets revealed, will her demons allow the two of them to prosper? 

A/N: I KNOW, I KNOW I’M LATE!! But I really wanted to proofread this cause I don’t know if I’m setting this up as I want to... I want this story to last and I wanted it to grow which caused me to write over 4k words, which makes this the longest chapter yet, this is how long I want to keep my chapters so it may take longer to get them out, so I wanted make sure I have everything set up so without further ado...

Word count: 4k words

Chapter 5 - A new chapter

“Welcome everyone, take a seat and we can get started.” Fat gum greeted everyone as all the major pro heroes in the cities filed in and took their seats. 

Fat gum took a deep breath before turning to Tamaki and Kirishima who were the two sidekicks he brought to the meeting. 

“We’re here to discuss the arising group, who call themselves Resist, my two sidekicks Red Riot and Suneater can catch everyone up to speed. 

Tamaki looked at Kirishima who nodded and turned in the PowerPoint they both slaved over the last two weeks. 

“We’ve been noticing a rise in flame and explosive based attacks all across Japan. They usually happen in places like shopping malls, college buildings, places where a lot of people convene in a confined space basically,” Kirk started to explain, pressing the button to bring up different reports of buildings on fire which included Tadashi Shopping Center. 

Tamaki took over the presentation at this point, “we’ve noticed that in the reports we receive about these attacks, all of the opposition had these jackets with a symbol either etched on the back and the chest. We believe this is what Resist uses to distinguish themselves from other villains, and anything with this type of organization needs to be squashed before it can grow. We’ve seen this type of thing before,” He explained before narrowing his eyes. 

“We don’t want a repeat of what happened those years ago. It’s taken a long time to rebuild hero society and it’s still on the rocks.” Tamaki finished his part before looking back at Kirishima to continue. 

“Since we know what symbol they use to distinguish themselves, that allows us to see when they pop up in cities and how many times they do as well. From what I found out, they never popped up in cities more than two times except for one, here in Esuha city.” Using the IPad, he flipped through the city and a map of Japan popped up. 

In all the other major cities, they had either a one or a two except for one, Esuha City which had a nine beside its point.”

“Oh wow,” a hero mumbled.

“Nine attacks? That’s crazy,” a female hero said. 

Tamaki started to speak, “with this, we hypothesize that Resist’s HQ is somewhere in the underground of Esuha city. This is the only evidence that supports this, and will be one of the main objectives of this meeting, figuring out where they reside so we can take them down.” 

“Wait, wait, wait, so we don’t know where they are?” A pro hero, Nova, asked, looking at Tamaki with skepticism. 

Kirishima stepped in, noticing Tamaki beginning to crack, needing a few minutes to collect himself again, he can only go so long before his thoughts intrude. 

“We only have an idea, the Fat Gum Agency already has heroes and sidekicks staking out possible locations where they might be but there’s always a chance that this lead may lead us nowhere. This leads us to one of the purposes of this meeting!” Kirishima ended with a smile and a thumbs up. 

His contagious smile made Tamaki feel a little better and he stood a little straighter and tapped the IPad to bring up the next slide. 

“The way they’ve been attacking reminds me a lot of The League of Villains and we all know how they’ve left a stain in Japan’s trust in Hero Society. Some of us in this room knew how hard it was fighting them,” Tamaki lamented, looking over at his partner and they both slightly nodded.

“We lost a lot of lives and a lot of good heroes with them, and we were lucky to prevail from that fight but everything changed with that fight. The fragile state that All Might left the country was crushed and the public hated most heroes. We need to squash any threat to what we’ve built over the years and that starts with Resist,”

 Kirishima and Tamaki remember the fight with the LOV, the screams, the blood, the bodies, the cleanup, the tears, waking up in a cold sweat for months on end. Tamaki remembers lifting some debris and seeing a bloody Barbie doll and throwing up in an empty alleyway. 

Both of them did not want to go through that again. 

“Okay, we get it, but honestly I just don’t see how this “Resist” organization is any trouble. They’re just blowing up buildings without any objective.” Another random local hero spits out, leaning against his arm. 

“You idiot!” 

Kirishima and Tamaki slightly smirked at who spoke up. The six-foot Explosion Hero: Ground Zero stood up, glaring at the man who just spoke up. 

“The League of Villains were like that too, just destroying with no objective, then they found one and that’s why heroes are looked at as fucking trash!” Katsuki Bakugou spoke up, slamming his hand on the desk. 

After Best Jeanist retired, he entrusted his agency to the loud ash blond man which shocked the rest of his sidekicks. Since then, he’s been his hero, signing on Denki and Mina after they had no agency to take them in. 

“I would know, me and Shitty hair,” he said, pointing at Kirishima, “we were there for a lot of them. We were also there when they found a purpose and that’s when they took me when I was still the first year. We underestimate them as we did with LOV and it could grow into a situation that we don’t want to see! Shouldn’t you fucking know this shit already?!” Bakugou finished before sitting down after Denki tried to calm him down. 

“Calm down Ground Zero, don't want you popping a blood vessel,” a cold voice called and everyone’s attention turned to the Half and Half hero who took over his Father’s agency once he graduated. 

After his father’s career was shot after the fight, his agency fell apart since Todoroki was still a first year. But as soon as he graduated, most of his father’s old sidekicks came back to him and his father even left the building to him. Deciding that he only knew his father since he interned and did his work-study there, he decided to revamp the agency as his own and remove the bad memories since then. 

“Come on guys, let’s not fight, this is a serious matter,” came the nervous voice Deku, the one everyone was looking at as the one who would replace All Might. 

He was the only one out of his class to start a hero agency right out of high school without having to inherit it, the rest of them becoming sidekicks. Izuku Midoriya replaced Hawks as the youngest pro hero ever. 

“Shut up Deku!” 

Kiri shook his head and facepalmed at his alumni antics. 

“Somethings don’t change, huh Kirishima?” Tamaki whispers to him which made the Unbreakable hero sigh and nod. 

“Alright!! Let’s get back on topic!” Kirishima yelled, clapping his hands to get the attention of his old classmates. 

“Sorry Red.”

“My apologies.”

“Tch, whatever Shitty Hair.”

Kirishima let out a breath of relief before looking over at Fat gum to take over the rest of the meeting. Fat gum nodded before smirking and rubbing his hens together. 

“Let’s get started.”

***

Tamaki was ready to go home. Everyone was arguing about the best next steps to take to defeat this new organization and so far, no one was agreeing. Some wanted to start their investigations in their cities but some wanted to blow up every building until the “Resist Turds” showed themselves so we could kill them. 

Tamaki sighed as he slouched in his chair, listening to his boss and other pro heroes argue about their next move. 

“We can’t ignore this issue anymore, but that doesn’t mean we lose morals when it comes to this. Heroes and the public still have a rocky relationship and we can’t get into anything rash!” 

“What?!? What’s waiting? I say we find them right now and smoke them out!” 

“You haven’t changed at all.”

Tamaki looked over to the clock and noticed it was getting real close to 3:00 pm, they’ve been here for almost 2 hours and some of these hero’s had long trips to get to. Tamaki tapped Kirishima and Gat gum and showed them the time. Fat gum slammed his hands against the desk before standing up, effectively silencing the room of arguing heroes. 

“We need to decide before we get overtime and something happens in your cities. So what’s our verdict, because this isn’t the only meeting we’ll have, we’ll have more in the future that we need to prepare for,” Fat gum said. 

Everyone refused to look at each other in the eye, that was before Deku decided to speak up. 

“If so many, I believe that their HQ could be possibly located here end think that the Fat Gum Agency should focus all resources in finding said hideout, but that doesn’t mean that the rest of us shouldn’t look for clues,” He said, pointing to the screen. 

“For those whose cities that were only hit once, keep an extra eye out if they ever come back. Those cities who were hit twice, you all should go back to where they hit you and see if they left behind any clues. They aren’t as organized right now so now’s the time to stop them and give the public something to believe in again!” 

And just like that, like the future Number One Hero he was destined to be, he raised everyone’s spirits in this new mission. To eradicate the Resist before they gain a name as big as LOV.

Y/n sighed as she walked in the building, headphones blasting a Megan song. She waved hi to the receptionist before turning the corner and jogging to her office. Sipping in her She opened the door and turned the light to reveal her office. She’s been so busy with the rise of villains since the two months she’s been here, that she hasn’t had a chance to finally decorate her office the way she’s wanted to. She paused her music and pulled out her headphones to be able to take a better look at her workspace. 

It had a window in the right wall of the room and her desk right in front of, facing the front of the room. The walls were bare and painted white and the room littered with unopened boxes from things she ordered. She looked down at the bag of decorations she recently bought to complete the rest and smiled. 

“Alright, I got 2 hours before the meeting with Fatgum and the other heroes. I better finish this before then,” she mumbled to herself before walking over to the biggest Amazon box. 

She turned on her speaker and connected them to her phone before continuing the song she was listening to while she was walking in the agency. 

’Simon says, put your hands on hips’

She rapped along the song under her breath as she cut open the box that was her storage shelf. As she was pulling the wrapped contents, a knock sounded off from her door. It was so quiet that she almost couldn’t hear over her music. She lowered the volume before opening her door. 

Standing outside of it was Tamaki who was dressed in very casual clothes, a pair of jeans, and a white tee shirt. Y/n stood there surprised, not expecting the Manifest hero to stand outside her door. Last she heard of him, he was working with Fat gum with a major mission. But that's what she heard. 

“Amajiki-san! This is a surprise? What brings you here?” 

Tamaki jumped at her sudden answer but collected himself, “I have something to talk to you and Aoi-san, is he here?” 

Y/n shook her head, stepping out the way for him to allow him inside her office.

“Today’s both of our days off, he went to see his mom and I decided to use this to come in to finally set up my office after two months of being here!”

“No, no it's my fault, I should have contacted you before I came over,” he shook his hands in front of his face. 

She waved him off, “It’s okay, I wasn’t doing anything important. So what’s going on?” 

She hopped on her desk and sat down and gestured for Tamaki to come closer. Tamaki hesitated to say anything, but time was of the essence and Fatgum didn’t tell Tamaki that the pair had the day off. He was about to start to speak but he looked around the room and noticed different boxes scattered around the room and looked back at Y/n who was bending down to pick up tape she threw around the room. Tamaki’s ears turned red and he quickly looked away right as she stood up. 

“Sorry it’s a mess,” she huffed, balling up the tape, “I wasn’t expecting for me to have any guests.”

He waved her off, “no it’s fine? What’s with all the boxes anyway?”

Y/n walked over to the biggest box and turned it around to show the picture of her bookcase shelf which still wasn’t open. Tamaki saw this and looked around and saw other office supplies and decorations still wrapped in plastic and packing peanuts all over the floor. 

“I decided to use my day off to finally decorate my office the bay I wanted it to be, but I may have… overspent on somethings,” she trailed off sheepishly, taking in how many boxes were in the room. 

Tamaki saw how exasperated she was, it would take her a long time to assemble the shelf and it's already 2:30 pm. He was all finished with his paperwork and was gonna go home after telling the partners before going home. He wasn’t even that tired after all. So with a deep breath, he called out Y/n as she was cleaning the peanuts away from the chairs to give them a place to sit. 

“Hey, Y/n?”

She stopped, loving her things, and turned to look at Tamaki, “yes?”

“I have the rest of the day off, I’d… I’d be more than happy to help you with your office. If... if you’d let me?” His voice got significantly quieter as he spoke. 

Y/n’s eyes brightened up, running over to take Tamaki by the hands. 

“Really!”  She exclaimed, pulling him closer to her body. 

Tamaki blushed at this sudden movement, “tried” to move his body and nodded his head, yes to confirm what he asked her. Y/n squealed before pulling the violet-haired man in a full-blown hug. 

“Thank you, thank you, thank you! I am honestly CLUELESS when it comes to putting things together and I wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to do it! This helps so much! Thank you!”

Tamaki’s face went red as a cherry as he tried his best to make his words conceit but his thundering heart, increasing body temperature, and his burning ears made that quite difficult to do. He gave her his best smile and she gave him an even bigger one back before dragging him to the biggest box. 

“Let’s get this over with, it’s the hardest one here.”

Together, the two of them opened the box and started taking the parts out. While the two of them set up her office, they got to know each other more, from him telling her about her times as a pro hero in America. 

“Yeah, America is so different from Japan,” she mused, ripping open the smaller boxes, “Here you get your license from the Hero Commission which is a branch under the Federal Government. You can work anywhere in the country! In America, you can only be licensed in the state you take your test in!” Y/n explained, grabbing the instructions to see which parts she had. 

“Wait, how many states are in America? I know there’s a lot,” Tamaki asked, making Y/n giggle and cover her mouth. 

Y/n shook her head, “there’s fifty of them, and I could only work in Texas, where I’m from.”

Tamaki shook his head, “but what if you’re out of the state and an emergency appears and they need help?”

Y/n shrugs, “I have to leave it to the heroes there, interfering could cause me to lose my job.” She laid out all the parts and counted in her head to make that all the parts were here. 

“When I’m not in my licensed state, I’m just a simple civilian with no permission to use their quirk.”

“America’s really different from Japan, I should have known though,” Tamaki let out a little chuckle as he said that. 

“Yeah, just the size of Texas is bigger than Japan. A different system is to be expected I guess,” Y/n shrugged her shoulders. 

She picked up the boards and the poles and started putting them together but for some reason, it wouldn’t go in. Feeling frustrated, she continued to struggle with the pieces, confused as to why they weren’t going in the hole. 

“Stupid piece of,” she hissed under breath as she continued to struggle, “you doing too much for me, just go in the thing!”

Hearing her mumble under breath in English, Tamaki turned around from building his own part to seeing Y/n struggle. He smiled slightly before getting up and walking to her. Y/n saw him move over to her and before she could process it, he grabbed the pieces from her. 

“No, I think it goes over here,” Tamaki reached over behind Y/n and flipped the pole, and slid it in the hole with no problem. 

Y/n smiled at Tamaki as he did the rest of the poles, doing it effortlessly. He was about to screw everything in whenY/n stopped him.

“I can do this part but thank you!” She grabbed her screwdriver from him and before she knew it, she placed a kiss on his right cheek. 

Oh lord, Y/n thought, her head running wild, oh lord, oh lord, oh lord, what the fuck did I do?!!? Why the fuck did I kiss him???? Well, it was only on the chek, BUT FUCKING STILL!!

Tamaki was frozen, his face red. His heart pounded in his chest, and he stood there frozen. She just kissed him on the cheek, a kiss, her lips were on some part of his body. His face, his right cheek. A girl, a girl he liked. 

Y/n on the other hand took a deep breath before going back to her unfinished bookcase and continuing as if nothing happened. Tamaki looked at her quietly putting her shelf together before Tamaki decided he should do the same. They both didn’t mention what happened.

---

“Oh yeah, Tamaki what was it that you wanted to talk to me about?” Y/n asked him, using the screwdriver to carefully tighten the screw in her new desk. 

Tamaki was pulled out of his thoughts, looked at her confused, before remembering what he had to talk to them about. Why he even came to her office in the first place. 

“It concerns both you and your partner, I was hoping he would be here with you since I didn't see him in his office,” Tamaki replied, standing up and stretching his back. 

“He’s using his day off to visit his mom,” she said, remembering the conversation they had while he dropped her off, “he hasn’t seen her in a while and he said he’s finally caught up with paperwork so yeah,” 

Tamaki nodded, not caring about what Aoi did. 

“But I’m sure I can relay to him what’s going on, so what’s up?” She asked, leaving on her desk for support from being on her feet all day. 

Tamaki nodded, “It’s about a case I’ve been working on, you remember your debut fight and the explosion at Tadashi Center right?” Tamaki started, going in his bag and pulling out his flash drive with a conceded version of his and Kirishima’s presentation. 

Y/n nodded, tilting her head at the question. He handed her the flash drive and began explaining what the mission was about and its ties to her debut fight and the attack in Tadashi Center

“We believe that the people who attacked during those two times are a part of the same organization, looking to gain the same infamy that the League of Villains gained. You know about the League right?”

She nodded, “anyone who has access to news worldwide knows who they are. They left a hole in Japan’s hero society, a ginormous one.” 

Tamaki nodded, “and we believe this group is trying to continue what they left and destroy society as we know it. This is what I’ve been working on for a while and we are finally making some moves. This is where you and Aoi-San come in,” Tamaki reported. 

“Comes in?”

Y/n used her fingers to replicate quotes as she said this. Tamaki nodded. 

“Your quirk is the most effective, the ability to swallow fire and make it your own, you’ll become a big help if more explosions ever come up. Aoi-San comes as extra backup, never go wrong with extra hands, c-considering he’s your part-partner,” Tamaki finishes, sweating profusely when he mentions Aoi as your partner. 

“So out of the sidekicks here, you want me and Aoi to join you?” 

Tamaki nodded, “we’ll have other heroes from other agencies join us, we didn’t want to take any chances with them, so we made sure that we made other heroes who were affected aware of this. This was a last-minute decision made by Fat gum after seeing reports on how you were able to put out the flames in less than 5 minutes. ”

Y/n stared at him with a look he didn’t recognize, he could feel his heart pound at that. 

Oh no, did I say something wrong?!? Oh no, I didn’t mean to offend her, what do I do?! This so weird, why the fuck do I do- Tamaki’s thoughts started to overrun him again, he almost fell into the deep put before hearing low chuckles echo through the office which pulled him out of his thoughts. 

Tamaki looked at Y/n with confusion as she continued to laugh. She then stopped laughing and jumped off the desk and stretched her back out. 

Y/n nodded her head in understanding, mumbling under her breath, “that makes sense.” 

Tamaki perked up, “so you’ll join us?”

Y/n blinked at him, confused at what he said, “I had a choice?”

It was Tamaki’s turn to look at her confused, why would she think she doesn’t have a choice in this? Tamaki ignored this and just nodded his head. Y/n smiled at that and gave him a thumbs up. 

“I’m all in! And I’m sure that Aoi would be perfectly okay with it, I’ll make sure of it!” She exclaimed. 

Aoi? He thought to himself, deflating slightly before giving Y/n a last nod and turning to leave. As he did that, he heard a gasp and Y/n asking for him to wait. Tamaki turned back around, heart pounding in anticipation and he started to sweat. 

“Ye-yes?” He stumbled out, cursing at himself. 

She smiled before handing him her phone with ‘New Contact’ pulled up.

“I’ve wanted to ask you for your number for a while because I think your quirk would be very suitable for some training together?” She smiled, crossing her arms. 

Tamaki still didn't say anything as she pushed herself up from leaning against her desk and picked up her phone. She typed away at it before handing it to him. 

He stared at it confused before realizing he was supposed to put his number in it. He quickly grabbed the phone and typed in his number and his name before handing it back to her. 

“H-here you go.”

Y/n smiled and took her phone back, tapping away at it before putting it away, “thanks! I’ll text you?” 

Tamaki's eyes widened and his ears went cherry red, “yeah, just...just text me.” He stumbled out before heading to the door

[gubes-sweaters]

Never Be the Same (part 2)

Author's Note: This is part two to the once shot I wrote called Never be the Same. I honestly didn't like the one shot, and I was surprised by the overwhelmingly positive reaction. A lot of people on Tumblr wanted a part two so here it is. I’ve re-written this like three times and this ending I’m semi happy with. Also, don't worry there's a cute fluffy ending. 

Content Warning: Arguing, idk just really sad for like half of the story. 

Word Count: 2.8k 

Never be the Same (part 2): You Have Us

I wake up in a cold and empty bed the next morning. The blankets on Spencer’s side of the bed are still made, so he didn’t come home last night. The sun is stinging my already burning eyes from crying all last night. What did I do? Can we come back from this? I can’t call him and I have no clue where he’s at. I start to get worried to the point that I’m nauseous. I haven't been feeling very good as of late, but I'm chopping it up to the stress of Spencer coming home. I’m trying to think that this feeling in the pit of my stomach as of late is because of how he distanced himself. At first, he wouldn’t keep his hands off me, and he followed me around literally everywhere. Once week three of him being home rolled around, and he started teaching I became a second class citizen. I’m not sure what the freak out was about yesterday because after Spencer got home we didn't have any problems with sex. I mean it only happened once a day or two after he got home, but I thought because it already happened that it would come naturally to us once again. 

There's this feeling of nauseousness in the pit of my stomach as I feel the bile rise in the back of my throat. I quickly run to the bathroom and release all of my food from last night. After a minute I can finally pull myself off of the ground and brush my teeth. As I go to brush my teeth a little part of my brain remembers a similar situation I was in about a month before Spencer went to prison.

-Flashback-

“Hey, are you okay?” Spencer consoles me as I’m hunched over the toilet. Despite being a germophobe he insists it’s okay because I need help.

“Yeah I might’ve picked up a stomach bug from work,” I say with my head resting on his shoulder.

He pulls me into a tight embrace before helping me off the ground. I walk over to the sink and go to brush my teeth, but as I do Spencer puts his hand over mine and shakes his head at me. 

“You shouldn’t brush your teeth right after you throw up. Just gargle some mouthwash it’ll have the same effect except you’re not brushing the acid into your teeth and gum line.”

“What would I do without you.”

“Probably have problems with plaque,” he says before kissing the crown of my head.

-End of Flashback-

I took Spencer’s advice from a while ago and went to use mouthwash but I couldn't find any. I check the medicine cabinet, a cabinet where we tend to keep extra toiletries for his go-bag, and finally, I check in the cupboard underneath the sink. When I grab the mouth wash I also knock over a small box. I pick it up and I’m reminded of the same day as the mouthwash memory. That day I've never seen Spencer as anxious, excited, and happy.

-Flashback-

“Are you sure? I think you’re being a little over dramatic,” 

“I'm completely sure that we should at least check. Between your nauseousness, acid reflux, fatigue, vertigo, and now you’ve missed your cycle twice. I think we have reasons to be at least a little suspicious. Please just take the test for me,” He says while passing me the box with two tests in it.

“Fine, but I don’t think I’m pregnant. So don't get your hopes up,” I say before walking to the bathroom. 

I take one of the two tests and Spencer and I wait the ten excruciatingly long minutes. Eventually, the timer went off, and we just stared at each other silently begging the other one to look. Eventually, I conceded because I'm super impatient. I picked up the stick and there was only one line there wasn't even a faint tiny second line. 

“As disappointed as I'm sure we both are, we have time. This means that we can both do some pre-planning for our little genius.” I tell him with a sad look on my face reflecting the same look Spencer has on his face. 

He just nods in silence. I can tell this really hurt him. Partly because he was so sure, and he's not one to be wrong normally. I can tell that he's mostly disappointed that I wasn't pregnant because he wants to be a father so bad. At least he took my advice for taking this time to plan very seriously. He came home the next day with three baby books which he read them all before I even finished cooking dinner. 

-End of Flashback-

That same feeling Spencer had that I lacked the first time I took one of these tests is now very present, but this time I'm the one with the feeling. Something in my gut is telling me to take this test. It’s really stupid because I don't want to worry about my boyfriend and a baby. This couldn't be a more inconvenient time. I'm not on birth control because I've had a bad reaction to the pill in the past, so it’s possible. My heart is telling me, yes, but my brain is telling me no that I'm stupid and I should be worrying about Spencer right now. I go against my brain's wishes and I take the test. In the meantime, while I'm waiting for the test results I set a ten-minute timer, and then I call JJ. We've been friends for a long time now, and she's the reason I met Spencer. When it rings through I assume she’s busy, so I decide to call Garcia instead. 

“What's up sugar plum?”

“Hey Pen I hate to ask this of you, but I'm really worried about Spencer. I know he always leaves the house with his work cell no matter what. He left last night and hasn't been home since. I'm worried about him. Can you at least tell me if he's okay?”

“Of course doll. Give me a moment. Is everything alright between you two?” she asks while her fingers were furiously typing away at her keyboard.

“Yeah, just a little bit of a disagreement, nothing to write home about.” 

“Okie Dokie his work cell first pinged off a cell tower near Morgan's house, then pinged off a tower near a bar down the street, then finally he’s been at Morgan’s ever since. Is that all I can help you with?” 

“Yes, thank you! I owe you one.”

“Oh please sugar the pleasure is all mine.” She says in a flirty tone before hanging up.

Next on the agenda is to call Morgan. I know him pretty well because I was dating Spencer for a couple of years before he retired from the BAU to be with his son. I call Morgan but it rings through. I decide that I might get better results if I talk to Savannah.

“Hey girly! Let me guess you want your boyfriend back;” She says in a goofy tone.

“Huh?”

“Spencer came here last night and said he needed to blow off some steam. He, Derek, and Hank went down to the park about half an hour ago. He didn't look upset at all today or yesterday, so I don't know what he means by blowing off some steam. Either way, he and Morgan have been all smiles all day. I figured something was off because he came here with tears in his eyes, but he hasn’t been crying since-”

Beep

Beep

Beep

The alarm interrupted both of our thoughts. I walk over to the test as I stammer out a sentence if you can even call it that. With a shaky hand, I pick up the test and look at the stick with two very defined pink lines.

“Hey...hey...um can I come over and talk to Spencer there. We had a bit of a disagreement last night. I think it would be best if someone like Morgan with a level head was there. Only if it’s okay I don’t want to intrude,” I say, my voice and hands shaking as my eyes start to well with tears.

“Nonsense you’re always welcome at our house. Any time of day I'll let the both of them know you’re coming over once they’re back from the park.”

“O--okay I'll see you in a bit,” I say before hanging up.

I decide that I need to calm myself down before driving far out to Morgan’s house. I go to the dollar store not far from our apartment and decide to take two more tests just in case. I also took this time to collect my thoughts and come to terms with the fact that I’m pregnant. Holy shit I’m pregnant! Sure enough, both tests also came back positive. There’s only one possible time it could’ve happened so that means I’m ten going on eleven weeks along. 

I drive to Morgan and Savannah's house with two of the three tests in my purse. This isn't the perfect time but I hope that Spencer will hear the good news and the old Spencer might come back to me at least part of him. I take a deep breath as I put my car in park, preparing myself for the worst and best possible situations. As I knock on the door I can feel my heart speed up faster and faster. The door opens to Savannah with a big smile plastered on her face.

“Hey, it’s nice to see you. I’ve missed you so much and I'm sure Morgan does too.” She says before stepping to the side and welcoming me inside.

“It's nice to see you too. Spencer isn't upset is he?” 

“No, he's actually sitting with Hank in the living room. He and Morgan have watched Hank trip over his feet for the past hour.”

We both walk into the living room and sure enough, the sight is enough to melt anybody’s heart. Hank uses the coffee table for balance, and he's walking back and forth between Spencer and Morgan. 

They both look up after Hank falls on his butt once more. Spencer gives me a tight-lipped smile and Morgan picks up Hank before walking over to me. 

”Spencer explained what happened. He doesn't know how to apologize for being so defensive and scared. Be a little lenient on him.” he tells me in a very calm and patient voice. The type of voice that a father should have. I baby talk hank and take in how much he's grown in a short amount of time before making my way over to Spencer. Savannah and Morgan leave the room monetarily and I sit next to Spencer in an awkward silence for a couple of moments.

It was completely silent, so quiet you could hear a pin drop. It wasn't until the silence was broken by the sniffles Spencer was trying to contain. I turn to see that hot tears are streaming down his face, and he's looking at me not like he's not angry but scared. I reach out to touch his arm and I hate the way his muscle tensed under my touch. Is he that disgusted with me? He can't even let me be near him comfortably.

“Can you please say something...anything at all.”

“I’m scared,” that's all you hear out of Spencer before he starts sniffling once more.

“Spencer why? Is it me? Did I do something wrong?”

“I’m scared of myself. I’m not the same person I used to be. I’m scared you’re going to leave me because I'm not the same. I'm just terrified that I might hurt you even.”

“Oh Spence, you didn't hurt me and I know you wouldn't. If you’re referring to last I know you never would. We need to talk about this. Why did you even go to Morgans in the first place.”

“I knew that I'd be far from you. Morgan had to learn more than once how to feel normal again after a traumatic situation. He also knew what it was like to possibly lose Savannah. I just needed a distraction. I'm sorry I snapped at you, but I didn't want you to press the issue.” He says just barely above a whisper. He can't even look me in the eyes he feels so ashamed. If he does make eye contact it’s a split second, and he looks like a kicked around puppy.

“Spencer… I’m not going to act like I know what you’re going through, but something I can do is be with you the whole time. I get Morgan is like your older brother and you look up to him, but this kind of feels weird having this serious conversation here.”

“I know it feels like we’re invading a bit, let's just go home.”

-time skip-

“This feels much better,” I say as I throw my keys on the countertop.

“It sure does.” He says standing right behind me.

Before he can protest I wrap my arms around him so tight I basically have a death grip on him. After he relaxes into my touch he starts to nestle his face in the crook of my neck.

“I’m just scared of losing you, hurting you, or upsetting you. I realize pushing you away and yelling at you did nothing but put me in jeopardy of doing all three.” He says as I can feel each breath pass along my neck. It feels like home because this apartment isn't home without him. 

“You’re not going to lose me. I love you so much. I'll always be there for you… we’ll always be there for you…” I trail off.

“Yeah I know… wait who else?” He asks while pulling me from him just enough, so he can see my face. With a proud smile from ear to ear I decide it’s now or never to tell him.

“Well, we won’t get to meet them yet. Give it about six months.”

“Wait, you're pregnant?” He asks totally dumbfounded. An IQ of 187 to 60 just like that. I just nod as the tears start to fall, but instead this time they’re happy tears.

“Oh my god! I’m going to be a dad!” He says as he picks me up and twirls me really quick.

“Wait, are you okay? I didn’t cause too much stress right? We’re going to have to do so many things we don’t have enough time. What if I’m not ready?” Panic thickly laced in his voice. His head is obviously going a million miles a minute. I need to bring him back down to earth and quickly.

“Love it’s going to be okay. I saw you with Hank today and I’ve seen you with Henry and Micheal. They all absolutely adore you. It’s going to take time, there's still a lot of healing. It’s all going to be okay because we’re going to have the little family we’ve always wanted. We can worry about all of the details tomorrow. I just want to be right next to you for the rest of the night. Okay?” I say as I lead him to the couch.

“Okay,” He says with a larger than life grin on his face. He leans in to kiss me and this time it wasn’t rushed or filled with dread. It was like he was putting all of his love into one tender little kiss. 

“I wish we had more time at Morgans. To think that’s going to be us one day soon. Hank was so adorable waddling around. He couldn’t even get a couple of inches before he fell back on his butt.” Spencer says as he wraps his arms around me. We're cuddling in a way that we're both lying on the couch but my back is to his chest. He rests his chin on my head and his hands on my lower belly. 

“Spencer I love you so much, but you have no room to talk. You don’t have much better coordination, Hank might even have you beat.” I giggle a bit before leaning back into him even further.

He laughs at me, and he knows it’s true because he doesn’t even try and rebut what I just said. Finally, everything feels like it’s right back into place. Sure, Spencer will never be the same again, but we can work with what we have. Deep down he’s still just as loving, hopeful, kind, caring, and empathetic as he once was. It’ll just take time, and we have about six months to spare.

.

.

.

.

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.

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Taglist: @rexorangecouny @haylaansmi​

[coldmorte]

Honestly if Dutch van der Linde curb stomped me I would probably thank him, no questions asked, and I think you'll say the same-

OKAY.

You know me WAY TOO WELL. I was thinking about this ALL day and smiling to myself because it’s SO TRUE. I mean, what a conversation starter and one hell of an amazing story to tell… in the event of survival.

Also, I was quite captivated by this idea (and apparently quite bored). It’s been a long ass week, I needed to blow off steam, and you planted the idea in my mind.

SO I BLAME YOU FOR THE SHORT STORY THAT CAME OUT OF THIS 😵

This has to be one of the worst things I have EVER WRITTEN and definitely the worst post I have EVER made on the internet.

I am straight-up warning you right now - you probably don’t even want to read what this turned into. I hesitated as to whether or not I should even post this because it is SO BAD, but I figured… what the hell? What do I have to lose? I don’t give a damn. (This blog WAS reputable once upon a time, I swear....)

Aside from the internal shame I bear and my strong desire to forget this, I will give one other major warning… VIOLENCE. This is a bit graphic, but hey… I didn’t bring up the idea. I merely brought it to life. 🤷‍♀️

Sooooo with that in mind, PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK. YOUR EYES AND MIND WILL FOREVER BE CURSED, BUT IF YOU ACCEPT THOSE TERMS, GO AHEAD. 😈😈😈😈

(PS if anybody is considering unfollowing me because of this post, I do not blame you one bit. But also, I promise it isn’t always like... this.)

I heard him before I saw him.

The sharp click-clack of his boot heels echoed loudly as he marched down the paved avenue. It was a harsh sound - heavy, but quick. There was a clear purpose in the steps. In the dead of night like this, nobody would dare to venture out without a good reason.

It had to be him.

Taking a drag from my cigarette, I smiled to myself as I lifted my head and blew the smoke towards the stars overhead. My eyes watched as it curled and twisted against the backdrop of the night sky, eventually dissipating into the vast heavens above.

When I finally lowered my chin, I could see his figure rapidly nearing out of the corner of my eye. I dropped the cigarette to the ground and crushed it with my foot. Still, I kept my head turned away from him. I wasn’t about to give him my attention that easily.

“You.”

The tone of his voice was deep and heated as he confronted me. I kept my eyes fixed on the ground as I saw him try to stand in my line of sight and force me to look at him, which only encouraged me to tuck my chin closer to my chest. Despite my best efforts to the contrary, I could feel my lips pulling into a wider smile.

“Look at me.” His voice seethed with so much fury, he didn’t even have to raise it to convey the emotional gravity of the words. Even so, I refused to give in that easily. He would have to do more than that if he was going to get what he came for.

Seeming to catch onto my resolve, his hands lurched forward and grabbed me by the jaw. He pulled my face upwards and held it there, forcing me to look into his eyes. It was hard to speak with his fingers digging into the soft flesh of my cheeks as he pinned my head to the wall. I could barely mumble out, “Hello to you as well, Dutch.”

Not even taking the time to allow for decent civility, Dutch ignored the greeting and got straight to the point. “Where are they? What did you do with them?”

I squirmed slightly under his touch as I moved my hands up to grip at his wrists. Tugging them downwards, he allowed them to be moved to my shoulders instead. However, his grasp tightened as he leaned his face closer to make up for the change. I knew better than to step out of line or push him anymore than I already was, but -

“With what? I’m afraid you’re going to have to be more specific than that.”

Involuntarily, my hands reached forwards and clutched at the fabric of his waistcoat to steady myself as he shoved me harder into the wall. I practically hummed at the feeling of the tight muscles of his chest beneath, biting my lip to suppress my ever-growing smirk. Even in the dim light, I could see his eyes narrow as his face pulled into a fierce scowl. The vein in his forehead throbbed with intensifying anger as he hissed out his next words. All this energy, all this attention…. just for me.

“You know what! MY GODDAMN EVELYN MILLER BOOKS!”

At that remark, I couldn’t hold it back any more. I felt my lips part into a wide grin as I flashed my teeth at him. I knew I was toeing a fine line here - quite a precarious one, to be more exact. My own eyes narrowed as I relished in the pure mirth of the situation. Dutch would have to kill me before I’d give that information up.

“Come on, you’re the one always saying we need more money. Miller’s entire collection, all signed first editions? They’re worth more money than the entire gang could earn in a month, maybe two.”

Silence.

It was as if time itself froze. Even the breeze and the insects of the night became mute.

Then, those brown eyes flashed with a glimmer of rage as they widened. His lips fell open in an inaudible gasp as the fingers dug into my shoulders with bruising strength. Voice uneven and barely above a whisper, it was filled with cracks as he snarled back, “You… sold my books?”

It started in my chest - a shake. Quiet, at first. But steadily, it crept up my throat and out my mouth.

A laugh.

The look on his face - the horror of it all - evolved into something comical beyond the wildest depths of my imagination. I could not resist.

“How else are we gonna get to Tahiti?”

Even underneath my chuckles, I could hear it. Or maybe, felt would be a better word. An exhale so indigent and ferocious it came out as more of a growl. It shook his whole body, all the way down to the tips of his fingers still holding my shoulders against the wall.

But it was short-lived.

In an instant, I felt the breath get knocked from my lungs as those strong arms ripped me away from the wall and threw me to the ground. I grunted at the mere speed and agility of it all, but as soon as I was able to recover from the shock, I could feel the quivering sensation again.

Laughter, louder this time.

My whole body trembled from the sensation as I lifted my head. I was on my stomach now with Dutch somewhere behind me. Drawing an arm inwards, I moved to push myself upwards. I felt weak as a whole range of emotions coursed through my body - shock, amusement, terror, achievement...

Raising my head, I could see the curb of the street in front of me. Figuring I could use it as a place to hoist myself up, I began to crawl my way towards it. However, he was quicker. Just as I planted my palm on its brick edge, the sole of his boot dug firmly into my back and pinned my face against it.

The laughter was muffled, but it continued on. My mouth was propped up against the hard surface of the curb as the rest of my body remained in the street.

Dutch said nothing, but the more my laughter continued to escalate, the harder his boot gouged into my spine.

Until, he paused.

Pulling his foot away, the pressure disappeared. I was free from his power.

For a second.

My lungs felt like they collapsed in on themselves, the laughter dying on my lips as my face was crushed into the brick curb with such brute force that my entire vision went blank. I could feel my front teeth snap as the remnants rebounded against the roof of my mouth.

But I was still breathing. I was still awake.

Barely.

I could taste the blood from my gums burning the tip of my tongue as I drew in an unsteady breath. His foot was no longer on my back, but I knew he was still there. He wouldn’t just leave me.

Mustering up all the strength I could, I rolled myself over. Eyes blinking open slowly, it was hard to see at first. The world was a messy blur, hazy and clouded over with spots of black.

And yet, through it all, I could still see him.

Still standing over me, Dutch was staring down at my crumpled body. I tried to blink a few times, but I was seeing double of everything. I could think of nothing to do, except for…

Laugh.

What more could I do? My jaw hung limply open, the cacophonous cackling coming out in pained chokes of breath and labored coughs. I could see the shape of his body as it leaned forward, a hand brushing along my cheek.

I had to say something, I had to…

“D…”

His hand froze. My entire face burned with relentless agony. He had won. It was over.

And yet, I could not give up. Not just yet. I had to get it out.

My final word.

“D… daddy…”

The sensation felt so distant and removed from my body, but I could feel it nonetheless. A rumbling laughter - weakened, but most certainly still discernible - returned to my chest as he snatched his hand away. Standing above me once again, I could hear the click of his gun as he pulled the hammer back.

“You never learn, do you?’

With that, an intense ringing filled my ears. It was deafening at first, but as my vision plunged into nothingness, it slowly faded away.

All that remained was my dead body and the broken grin plastered across my face, forever preserving my final moment of overwhelming pleasure and gratitude.

 ---- FINE ----

Note: I was thinking about this. I honestly have no idea how I would say the “th” in “thanks” without teeth, so I’d probably resort to showing my appreciation through excessive joy instead… and by taking my last moments to sneak you-know-what-word in there. I think I could manage that without teeth.

Hehe. Anyway, this is still WAYYY out of character for me. I just was in a reallyyyyyy weird mood, and I’ve always had too vivid of an imagination. Please, forgive me. I am done now. (If you DID read this far, I am genuinely curious to hear your thoughts on my absolutely horrific garbage, though) 🙃

HAVE A GREAT DAY 💜💜💜💜

[tanookikiss]

Paul’s Birthday

Pairing: Tommy x Paul, Gene x Eric. S

Rating: T

Author’s note: So I’ve had this silly little fluffy idea in my head for about a month. I wasn’t sure if I was going to finish it in time, but I have some awesome friends to thank for that. Thank you @ashestoashesvvi  for offering me valuable art tips and suggestions for this story.

................................................................................................................................

Tommy looked forward to all special occasions. He adored gatherings, celebrating milestones with his loved ones. However, there was one special occasion in particular that the guitarist had been prepping for months: Paul’s birthday.

The Spaceman would be the first to admit his infatuation with The Starchild. Who could blame him? Paul was the whole package; smart, sexy, kind, and talented. The two had spent a lot of time together, bonding over their shared love of painting, and Tommy cherished every minute of it. He adored any chance to be with Paul, really, but there was something special and intimate about their art sessions. He had taught Paul a few tips here and there, and Paul took to it like a natural. 

Paul wasn’t just painting a canvas; he was baring his soul. His radiant smile sent butterflies a flutter throughout Tommy’s stomach when he mixed his paints. There was a childlike wonder that twinkled within those beautiful chocolate eyes as the brush met the canvas ever so delicately. Paul was soft and vulnerable. It was a side of himself that he shields from the world out of fear and that made Tommy sad. Paul was at his most beautiful whenever he could let go and create. And Tommy was determined to help set him free.

As the party guests were busy mingling in Paul’s living room, Tommy was busy setting up his grand gift display in the art studio. Gene and Eric distracted Paul while Tommy meticulously re-arranged the color palette to be perfect. Nothing was too good for his Paul. He smiled as he observed his display.

“Hey Tommy, if you want any cake you better hurry before Gene monopolizes the sweets table,” Eric announced, walking into the studio with a glass of champagne. “Holy shit! How many cans of paint did you buy!?” he exclaimed, nearly spilling his drink all over the floor.

“Seventy-two,” Tommy replied with pride. “All seventy-two colors of Liquitex Professional Acrylic Paint. It took me weeks to get every single color to complete the collection,” he gestured to the colorful pyramid display in the center of the room.

Eric blinked, completely gobsmacked at the impressive rainbow pyramid before him. “Of all the things you could’ve bought Paul, you spent weeks buying various fingerpaints!”

“This is the highest quality acrylic paint on the market. All of the great artists use this brand. It’s in very high demand!” Tommy blurted out, explaining his reasoning to the skeptic drummer.

Eric squinted his eyes. “Oh yeah? What’s so special about it?”

Tommy carefully pulled a red bottle down from the display. He opened the top to show Eric the buttery red consistency inside. “Each color is uniquely formulated to bring out the brilliance and clarity of the individual pigment. It’s perfect for color mixing.”

Eric still couldn’t see what was so great about this overpriced paint. It looked like regular red paint to him, but he knew Tommy went to a lot of trouble to get it for Paul, and he knew how important it was for his friend, so he tried to be as cordial as he could, “Yeah, that red is…very red,” he smiled, patting Tommy on the back. “I’m sure Paul will love it.”

Tommy smiled back at his friend. “Paul is an artistic genius! He only deserves the best.”

Eric scratched his head while observing Paul’s latest painting titled, “Doors Of Perception” in confusion. “Well, I wouldn’t go that far…I mean, this door looks more like a window!”

“I think it looks like a waffle.”

Tommy and Eric turned their heads to see Gene propped outside the door, munching on his cake.

Tommy shook his head. “You guys aren’t looking deep enough into the emotionally charged compositions. It’s Abstract Art. It’s not supposed to be realistic. The colors and shapes represent aesthetic ideas instead of natural forms.”

Gene and Eric gave each other a puzzled look with arched eyebrows before turning their attention back to their supposedly art connoisseur Spaceman.

“Then how do you explain this one?” Gene asked, pointing his fork to a canvas covered in brown smudges with a hint of blue and green along the edges.

Eric chuckled. “Let me guess…it’s supposed to be a window into the troubled soul of a starving artist,” he overdramatically stated, prompting a deep chuckle out of Gene.

Tommy rolled his eyes. “This one is not finished yet. Paul has been working on this piece for days now.”

Eric blinked. “It took him days to just randomly slap some brown, blue and green onto a canvas!?”

Tommy sighed. He honestly had no idea why he bothered trying to explain Abstract Art to these two unappreciative buffoons.

“Tommy? Are you back here?” Paul asked from outside the door.

In a hurry, Tommy put down the red bottle in the middle of the floor and scrambled to the door just before Paul could set foot into the room.

“Hey Paul,” he asked breathlessly, trying his best to block Paul’s view from his surprise.

Paul cocked his head curiously. “There you are. I’ve been looking everywhere for you! I thought you left,” he said sadly, twirling a nervous finger around his necklace clasp.

“No! Never! I would never leave you…err… leave the party,” Tommy fumbled, shaking his head. Eric snickered behind him. Tommy resisted the urge to swat at him.

“What are you all doing in my art studio?” Paul asked, noticing Gene and Eric standing behind Tommy.

Before Tommy could speak, Eric blurted out, “Tommy has a surprise for you!”

“Oh!” Paul’s eyes lit up, and there was that joy that Tommy loved so much. “You got me a surprise! You didn’t have to…but I am glad you did,” his grin blossomed into a huge smile, melting Tommy’s heart on the spot.

Paul reached out and grabbed Tommy’s hand, pulling him out of the room. “We’re about to open presents in the living room. I didn’t want to start without you,” he said softly. Tommy blushed and followed Paul’s lead eagerly, ignoring Eric and Gene’s playful taunts the entire way back.

Once inside the living room, everyone gathered around Paul as he opened up his various exquisite gifts from Rolex watches to fine silk bed sheets.

“Alright, this is from Gene,” Paul said, picking up a random present from the table.

“Ha! Oh, this is going to be good,” Eric snorted, smacking his gum loudly. Gene gave Eric a stern look, which the Catman only gave a cheeky smirk in return.

Paul unwrapped the present, only to find a box. He opened the box and saw what looked like a wooden knife block with a knife in it. Paul pulled the knife out, dropping it in horror.

“Ah! What the hell, Gene?”

“What? It’s a Nesmuk! Didn’t you say you wanted one?” Gene crossed his arms and raised his eyebrow.

“Yes, I did, but why the hell is it stained red?” Paul asked in disgust.

Everyone eyed the suspicious red substance all over the knife blade and then looked up at Gene with weirded out expressions.

“What? It’s just strawberry jam. Eric didn’t wash the dishes so I had to use the knife to make a sandwich,” Gene explained casually.

“So, instead of just washing a butter knife yourself you just used the expensive fine German cutting knife?” Eric laughed in between loud gum smacks.

“Uh, yeah, it’s still a utensil!” Gene defended abrasively.

“Well, um, thanks Gene,” Paul said with an obvious forced smile. He then reached for another gift in the pile.

“This one is from Eric,” Paul said, reading the tag.

Eric grinned in excitement as Paul unwrapped his gift.

“It’s a Nick Fouquet hat! By why is it flat?” he pouted, examining the squished black hat with a few dented blue feathers on the side.

“Gene accidentally sat on it,” Eric replied with crossed arms.

Gene merely shrugged as he continued munching on his chocolate cake.

Paul put the hat aside. “We should all head up to my studio. Apparently, Tommy has a marvelous surprise for me that I’m just dying to see,” he grinned at Tommy.

“I wanted to save the best for last,” he whispered in Tommy’s ear, causing the younger man to blush as he led the group up to Paul’s art studio.

Everyone oooh’d and ahhh’d over the beautiful acrylic paint display, but no one was more intrigued than Paul, of course.

“Is this the entire Liquitex Professional Acrylic Paint collection?” Paul asked in awe, circling around the magnificent seventy-two canned pyramid like an excited child on Christmas morning. “You got all of this for me!?”

Tommy couldn’t stop the large grin from spreading across his face even if he wanted to. “Yeah, I sure did.”

Without warning Paul pulled Tommy into a tight loving hug. “Thank you so much, Tommy! I love it!” he cheered, kissing Tommy on the cheek. “He taught me how to paint!” the birthday boy bragged to everyone in the room. Tommy’s cheeks burned hot as he leaned closer into the warm embrace. He wished he could stay in this position with Paul forever.

Breaking away from the hug, Paul still kept his arms around Tommy. “I want to test the colors out on a blank canvas,” he smiled, turning to grab a clean canvas.

As Paul was carrying a large canvas over, Tommy noticed the lone red paint can he had left in the middle of the floor carelessly. Quickly, he rushed over to retrieve the can to prevent Paul from tripping over it, but, unfortunately, Tommy’s foot caught a nearby easel causing him to lose his balance. Everything happened so fast. Before Tommy could get his wits about him, his arms, hands, the floor, and the unfinished painting were covered in red paint.

Surprised gasps filled the room as everyone grew quiet, staring down the clumsy guitarist.

“Nice fall, Grace!” Eric bellowed out loud, breaking the awkward silence.

“Did you have a nice trip?” Gene chimed in, making the already embarrassing situation ten times worse!

Tommy’s face flushed red. “I’m s...so sorry!” He stood up wobbly, looking around for some paper towels. He felt delirious as if he was trapped in some sort of nightmare.

“My painting!” Paul cried out, dropping the new canvas to rush over to inspect the damage done on his precious art work.

That precious glimmer in his eyes had dulled. That beautiful radiant smile had become a frown. That look of disappointment plastered on his face would forever haunt Tommy in his dreams. Several nosy bystanders had snapped out of their trance, rushing over with paper towels to help clean up the mess.

“Paul, I’m sorry,” Tommy’s voice cracked, staring at the other man helplessly.

Paul didn’t even look at him. He just stood motionless, staring at the ruined painting in silence. Tommy couldn’t bear it anymore and rushed off to the nearby bathroom, turning on the water faucet and pumping lots of soap into his hands. With a sad sigh, he scrubbed his hands and arms in the soapy water with fury. He wanted nothing more than to erase the evidence of his great blunder. The bright red paint residue mixed with the white soap had turned into a hideous pinkish color stained onto his skin. Who was he kidding? It would take days for this accursed color to come out. Just another painful daily reminder of how he ruined Paul’s birthday.

Tommy held his head down in shame, feeling completely ashamed and angry at himself for what had happened. He knew Paul had worked hard on that painting. All those relentless hours down the drain and all because of one careless mistake.

Paul knocked on the bathroom door before entering. “Tommy? Are you alright?”

Tommy took a deep breath and faced Paul. “Paul, I’m so sorry I ruined your painting. I just feel awful for what I did.”

“Ruined it?” Paul blinked at him. “You just made it even better.”

Tommy looked over in confusion. He wasn’t expecting that kind of response out of Paul. “What do you mean?”

Paul grinned, putting a plaster tool in Tommy’s hand. “Come on, we both started this, let’s finish it together.”

Tommy followed Paul back into the studio and observed the painting. The red and brown had mixed into a gorgeous burgundy color with hints of blue and green on the edges. The guests were buzzing around the painting like bees to honey, commenting on what a superb color that was. Gene and Eric stood dumbfounded, unable to figure out what everyone was so excited about. Gently, Paul put his hand on Tommy’s hand, guiding the plaster tool onto the canvas. Everyone watched closely as the two men moved like one. In one swift motion they had melded the gorgeous deep reddish colored form into a heart shape.

“Beautiful,” Paul whispered, his eyes surveying the gorgeous masterpiece.

Tommy nodded in agreement. “Beautiful,” he agreed.

Paul looked up to see that Tommy wasn't looking at the painting but at him instead. The two leaned in closer, sharing a gentle kiss.

~There are no mistakes, only happy accidents~ Bob Ross

[criminalmindsmad]

What baby?

Requests are OPEN until Sunday! Hope you like it teehee - Ash x

Request: can you write a request where you're in a relationship with Hotch and the rest of the team don't know until the reader finds out she's pregnant. 

"Ok, you go in now and I'll meet you there in half an hour" you rolled out of his arms so he could move. He sat up slightly and looked down at you, your hair all messy from the pillows, eyes still pressed closed and a quite contented expression on your lips. He smiled as he stroked the hair out of your face.

"I don't believe you y/n." He chuckled to himself and he saw one of your eyes pop open to look at him, you smiled at him, one of your cheeky smiles.

"Fine, 45 minutes" you spun yourself over snatching the quilt away from him. He pounced on top of you trapping you in a duvet cocoon and placing his face inches from yours. Your eyes traced over his face and you bit your lip "I love you."

"I love you too y/n." He smirked as he pressed his lips gently to yours, releasing you from your cozy prison so you could bring your hands up to his hair. His grip was thoroughly on your thigh, forcing out a small moan from inside you.

Just as things were getting good your phone's buzzed, swiftly followed by the face of Penelope Garcia plastering itself over Hotch's phone screen as her caller ID flashed up.

"I'll hop in the shower while you answer that. We can pick this up later huh?" He nodded and slapped your butt as you walked past him. You winked as you dropped your pyjamas on the floor just as he answered the phone.

***

The team touched down in Colorado and Hotch sent you and JJ to the crime scene, a mother of two had been brutally murdered in her home while the rest of her family were locked in the basement.

You both walked directly to the crime scene, the body was still in the centre of the room as CSI technicians hurried around the place collecting evidence. JJ started to rattle off things she had noticed as you quietly listened and observed. You decided to have a look at the victim to see if the state of her body could tell you anything. Pulling back the sheet you felt the bile rise in your throat and you found yourself gagging, you were not normally the one to be phased by a crime scene but everything in you felt like it wanted to get out. You quickly set the sheet down and stood up hoping taking the site away would make you feel better.

"Y/n are you ok? Do you wanna go and get some air?" JJ looked at you with her concerned eyes, but you didn't want her to worry about you, at least you didn't have your head caved in by some psycho.

'yeah...yeah I'm fi...I'm..oh god" you quickly ran out of the house and past the police tape, losing your breakfast next to an unsuspecting tree. A couple of the local police officers had watched your antics and quietly judged you. You centred yourself and managed to stop the seasick feeling from overcoming you again. Popping a piece of gum in your mouth and wiping your mouth you headed back into the crime scene, greeted by JJ doing the 'im very worried but I don't want you to think about it too much so I'm going to pretend it didn't happen but will give you a look as I leave to tell you I'm worried' act. "I'm fine JJ" you smiled at her reassuringly "must've eaten something bad"

***

"Are you sure you're ok?" Hotch had pulled you aside at the precinct after JJ mentioned your incident.

"Yes I'm fine" you glanced around to make sure none of your team could see you before placing your hand on his and squeezing "I just took a funny turn, it was either something I ate or for once I stopped being an FBI robot and let the site of a woman with a caved in face bother me" you looked into his brown eyes and pleaded with him to relax, you'd been through much worse together and a little sickness wasn't going to hurt.

Hotch and you had gotten off to a rocky start, he didn't particularly want you on his team but the brass had forced him to take you on after you'd made it clear you were a valuable asset. In an attempt to prove a point he had really put you through your paces, making you jump through hoops and testing you in any way he could. But no matter what he did and how hard he pushed you, you came back fighting and he had to admit he was impressed. Gradually your relationship developed, you became very good friends and discovered you were strangely very similar but it only took one small moment of weakness on your part for you to plant a kiss on him and push your relationship over into the next stage. Somehow, and you had no idea how, you had managed to keep this relationship a secret for over a year, you'd been sure the team had caught on but yet they never did, Garcia continued to sign you up to dating apps without your permission and Rossi had forced Hotch onto a multitude of blind dates. You'd thought about telling them a couple times but it never felt right, and besides having a secret from your team was just a little bit, on a lot, fun.

"I know y/n. But I just worry, and it gets harder to pretend it's just because I'm your boss when every time I see you my stomach hurts" you smiled at him and bought your hand to his cheek.

"I know what you mean but you have nothing to worry about. I'm too busy to get sick, busy being sexaay" you struck an awkward pose and he just stared at you.

"Wow I think we should break up." He laughed as you softly smacked him "let's get back to the team before you strike another 'sexy' pose and I tear your clothes off"

"Oh my Agent Hotchner that's hardly appropriate" you winked as you walked out of the door.

***

"Ryan Yates FBI put your hands in the air!" You and Reid apprehended the unsub, backing him into a corner and forcing him to surrender. As you walked over to him and grabbed his wrist he swung his body back and slammed you into a wall knocking the air out of you. Reid quickly took down the unsub and cuffed him while the rest of the team filed into the room. Aaron, trying to stay professional, ran over to you to check if you were ok, helping you to your feet.

"Are you ok? You hurt?"

"No no I'm fine, just a bit winded, I can walk it off." You smiled at him and held onto his arms as you got your breath back. Suddenly, your knees felt week and your vision began to blur, you felt your body falling from beneath you as you reached out further for him "aaron...something's not right... Aaron"

***

The soft beeping of the heart monitor woke you up and you opened your eyes as you shuffled up the bed. You looked around the hospital room and were greeted with the faces of your team, Aaron was sat right next to your bed looking the most worried you'd ever seen him.

"What happened?" In all honestly you felt fine, actually you felt quite refreshed.

"You collapsed, just after we took down Yates" Reid piped up from the corner of the room "how are you feeling?"

"I'm ok" you smiled at him and then looked at Aaron, still looking pale and concerned "I'm ok Aaron, I probably just got winded and forgot to breath, either that or I just passed out because I thought it might spice things up a bit" you winked at Rossi who rolled his eyes and shook his head.

A short round doctor appeared in the doorway, clearing his throat to catch you attention. "Ah Miss Y/l/n I'm so glad to see you awake."

"Yes, I'm so sorry about this, I'm sure it was nothing, have you come to discharge me?" You smiled at him.

"Actually Y/n I just needed to ask you some questions about the baby?" He walked over to the foot of the bed.

"What baby?"

"You baby miss Y/N. You're pregnant?" Your mouth dropped open. As did Aaron's. As did every member of the teams'.

"Pregnant?" Both you and Aaron spoke in unison, eyes fixed on the doctor. "I'm pregnant?"

"Yes. About 10 weeks" your eyes began to tear up and you looked at Aaron.

"I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant!" You began to cry as you smiled and took his hand "I'm gonna have a baby." You looked into his tearful eyes "we're gonna have a baby"

"Yeah…yeah we are." He leaned in and kissed you, pulling you close to him and wrapping his arms around you. "I love you so much"

"I love you too" you choked out as your lungs filled with happy sobs. He took his arms from around you and pressed his hand against your stomach. Bringing you in for another kiss.

"Ahem" the room descended into silence as you both realised who was still stood in the room. Slowly you took your eyes off one another and scanned around the room, a sea of shocked faces greeted you. You couldn't help it, but you started to giggle.

"I guess we have a lot of explaining to do huh" you looked back to Aaron who just started to smile "can I have my congratulations hugs first?" You looked over to Rossi who cracked the biggest smile and came in to hug you both followed swiftly by the rest of the team. And as you and Aaron were pressed together by the weight your your team you looked up at him as he spoke.

"You will be the best mum and the best wife." And he pulled a ring out of his back pocket.

[kitsune-kaos]

25: idea of a perfect date?

26: Biggest pet peeves?

44: A random fact about anything

25)

You pick me up, or I you, and we go out to dinner. I’m down to eat or try anything, so I let you decide where we go—unless you’re someone who’d prefer I pick, then I’d probably go with Mexican, Sushi, Thai, or Vietnamese (phö specifically lol). After that we’d go to a local bookstore or mall and just roam and talk about stuff we like and show each other things we find. After that we could just drive around and eventually find a good place to enjoy the sunset together—maybe we could get ice cream or drinks along the way. If neither of us are tired and we enjoy each other’s company, then we could go back to one of our places and either play video games, watch a movie, or just chat (maybe a mix of all three lol). If there’s clear mutual interest and you include some cute body contact during the night (e.g., hand on my leg, holding hands, arm around my shoulder, shoulder rub, etc.) I will more than likely melt 🥴 And if we both had a good time, hopefully there’d be a date #2 💕

26)

Ignoring or talking over me, being dismissive, unnecessary screaming, loud gum chewers, people who make situations tense by not reading the room and then acting a fool, being treated like a child (youngest kid things), bigotry, and religious hypocrisy (particularly from religious elitists)

44)

Back in my heyday of anime watching (middle to high school) back when anime on the internet was so much easier to access 🥺 there was still a relatively small collection on Crunchyroll, so there’s some shows I’ve watched and really enjoyed that I never hear anyone talk about. One is Beast Player Erin.

I’m having trouble even knowing where to start with this one! Based in more of an era of kingdoms—pre-Industrial Rev. I believe—the world is fairly mundane with a few exceptions. While I don’t recall any blatant magic, there are a few magical experiences. More importantly though, there are two beasts in this world: the Toda and the Oju.

Erin grows up with her mother in a village where the Toda are raised (if I remember correctly) and her mom is the beast trainer of the village. The Toda, which are large semi-aquatic reptiles with dragon-like faces, are trained by the two warring local kingdoms to fight each other (Idk if the mom raised them for this tho).

Eventually, as she gets older, Erin finds herself at a place where Oju are trained. Oju are winged beasts like griffons but with a wolf’s head. The Oju, know as Royal Beasts, are also trained to fight in the war. As a trainer of Oju, Erin eventually finds herself intertwined with the war and... well I don’t want to spoil much else 😜

I do have to admit it is a somewhat slow anime and isn’t “top tier” or the shit for everyone. But it did make me cry only a few episodes in. So... 👌🏼

Now for the other Anime!!!

Glass Mask is one of my all time favorite anime. It’s about this basic girl who gets shat on by everyone and her mom’s like “Maya why are you so dumb and worthless” *starts sobbing* cause the only thing she’s good at is memorizing scenes on TV and perfectly reenacting them 😩

So at some point she gets noticed by this mysterious older woman who is opening up an acting studio and eventually is convinced to join cause she has ✨the it factor✨

Eventually she becomes rivals with this rich dynasty prodigy child and they’re both so cunt 💕 (honorary)

But just wait til you meet Mr. Purple Roses, Maya’s secret fan/admirer who helps her occasionally along her journey.

And honestly I stan the performances they do. Like this show is how I’m familiar with A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Wuthering Heights, Little Women, that play about the feral girl, and even the story of Hellen Keller!!

Omg and the drama of the impromptu one-woman play! And then old bitch sticks her hand out and people in the audience be SHOOK!!! And OMG then there’s the school performances she does, and one she got the role of dumb bitch but then she cried during the play and the audience shit themselves they were so STRICKEN!!! And that other one as the queen’s understudy where she darted eyes at a bitch and sis PISSED herself on stage!! And bitch there was even a scene where this bitch played a doll. And then there’s the time she fully ate dirt cause she a bad bitch!

In this show the tea isn’t spilt, it’s full on thrown. Hoes be blind af going to the movies and dying in their seats. Yes there is a questionable romance that I had weird feelings about, and yes she does get drugged and framed to ruin her career, and yes a hoe almost falls off a bridge and the other hoe’s like “but what if I don’t help her 👀”, and yes she is trained to act by getting thrown into a shed in the middle of winter, and yes she does join a troupe with a kinda genderfluid girl. And YES!! You Should watch it 😘

[halothenthehorns]

TLTNL- DUDLEY DEMENTED

The graveyard appeared in a haze around him, and the tombstones were the good features. The memory resurfacing in his mind's eye as he relived the moment again and again, Voldemort's ghastly white face, the threats and promises of his death, and always lingering in the background, Cedric-

"Harry, Harry love, wake up."

A gentle hand was brushing the bangs away from his face, only twitching slightly over the scar but continuing the methodic pattern. Squinting past the gray haze of sleep, he caught a glimpse of red, and for a moment was sure it was Ginny, but that faded absently from his mind without even fully registering why she'd be there.

Then he kept blinking, and instead of the wide brown eyes of Mrs. Weasley promising a hug whenever he did, or didn't, need one, his own green were staring down at him.

"Mum?"

For a moment Harry wasn't entirely sure if he was even awake...but his eyes were already closing again, her soft voice whispering reassurances, "it's alright dear, you're safe here."

Real or not, Harry felt himself relaxing under that touch, and soon faded back into a restless rem of a long dark corridor...

    Lily was cooking breakfast with an absent minded look on her face. She wasn't churning on the book they'd most recently finished though, if she lingered on that to long she was likely to start crying into the pot below her. No she was instead worrying over the fact that they had an Order meeting tonight, and the four of them would be unable to attend. Once she'd served breakfast and brought this to the attention of the others, Sirius brushed her off at once.

"Quit fretting Lil's, so we miss one meeting, they won't go flying off the handle for that."

"Besides, I think it's for the best," Remus grumbled towards his bowl without looking at anyone. "Doubt some of us could walk in there without executing a murder we couldn't fully explain." He took an extra hard bite at his spoon at the end, nearly ripping the metal off.

James's hand twitched on the way to his mouth, spilling porridge over his nose instead, and only after he'd carefully wiped it up did he say, "it's not like we can do anything about it. If someone comes around here asking questions, we'll do the same as we did before and pretend like nothing's wrong. It's none of their business if we're being extra cautious of late and didn't attend this one meeting."

Lily was stirring her food absently in the bowl, she hadn't touched a bite. She was too busy straining over the fact that they could honestly use the Order's help with this. They should know that there was a traitor among them before any more secrets were spilled, and she couldn't help the deep longing she had just to see them all. So many were going to die in the coming year.

Harry watched them all with a deep ache, again feeling personally responsible he was putting them in such a hard spot all because of his presence. No one was eating much anymore, and when Harry went to put his finished bowl away and began collecting the others no one protested.

Despite the fact that they all knew full well this stupid book was as likely as the last ones going to start with the Dursleys, Remus kept the baby almost hopefully in his lap. He felt safer with his little cub in his arms while hearing about them than having to picture this very infant around those people. Harry in particular couldn't help but smile when he saw this. Aside from his own parents, there was just something adorable about Remus holding a baby he couldn't put into words.

It was a somber group that flopped down into their spots in the living room and Sirius who started without much enthusiasm, and the book he had to grab wasn't helping. It was solid black, only the faint purple five on the spine barely catching the light showed it was next. Sirius tried to pretend that wasn't a bad omen as he cleared his throat.

Privet Drive was coming to the close of another heated day.

Sirius had never believed he could say a street name with as much hatred as he hurled that out with.

All cars were parked, and the once green lawns seemed to be withering on sight for the use of hosepipes had been banned due to drought.

"Huh?" James asked in confusion. He'd admit he was also trying to delay a bit until he had to hear about the inside of one particular house.

"Hosepipes are used to pump water out," Lily grumbled more than explained, at this point she'd pay Sirius just to skip these parts until Harry could escape to the Burrow, but she also knew that wouldn't do any good. In some perverse way she wanted to know every terrible thing Petunia and Vernon had done to her son, that way she could kill them with a much more clear conscious knowing everything. "Sometimes in very hot summers, the city puts restrictions up so the residents have limited use."

James couldn't even imagine the idea, but then again, he'd never thought to question where the water came when he used a spell.

Without their usual aquatic uses to keep them busy outdoors, the inhabitants of Little Whinging were now more seen inside with all windows thrown open in attempts to coax a nonexistent breeze. The only person left outside was a boy in the flowerbeds of number four.

"Please tell me they don't have you out there pruning in that weather," Remus forced out between gritted teeth.

"Nope," Harry murmured. His memories of the summer were still murky, the last clear thing he remembered was getting off the train into Vernon's car, but he already had a bad feeling about how this summer had gone. Not that any of his summers at that place were ever really considered pleasant, so maybe he was just getting this one confused with a previous one? He hoped so, because the bad feelings bubbling up in him now weren't proving a good omen.

Very skinny, with black wild hair and spectacles covering green eyes, he looked even more unhealthy than usual laying in the dying plants.

"That comes from too little nourishment," Lily sneered, thinking back to the new levels of starving they'd been putting her boy through that past summer.

Harry Potter's appearance was an unwelcome sight to the sort of people in this town who thought scruffiness should be punishable by law,

"Well I think how you treat him is punishable by law!" James snapped, "and I can't bleeding wait to act on it."

Harry got the sense he wasn't going to be reporting the Dursleys to anyone, but his father would be facing his own law somewhere in there, causing Harry to inch away from him just a bit in fear. He really wasn't looking forward to what would happen to his muggle relatives when they got out of here.

but Harry had hidden himself behind some hydrangea bushes and so was currently invisible to anyone who would glare.

"Why were you hiding yourself?" Sirius asked, infusing some mischief into his voice Harry quickly shot away with an exasperated look. He had no more clue than them, yet. Besides that, Harry had always strived to keep himself out of trouble at the Dursleys, though hardly ever exceeding that wasn't the point.

The only way he could be spotted was if someone stuck their head out the window of the living room and looked directly down on him. Harry felt he should be congratulated for finding this spot.

"Well congratulations then," James nodded somberly. He really couldn't find any of his normal enthusiasm while having to hear about Harry there. He was half waiting any moment for Voldemort to pop up all over again and start trying to curse his son where he lay, though hopefully he'd at least hit Vernon first.

It may not have been comfortable, but it was far better than trying to sit in the living room where Vernon kept grinding his teeth so loud and snapping accusing questions at Harry, he couldn't hear the news.

Now Harry could feel the soft melding beginning on the edges of his mind as a memory was being returned, and he was more confident than ever his first impulse had been right, he'd found a new level of hate for his summer holidays. He was utterly confident it had something to do with watching the news, or perhaps a lack of news-

"I know you're not going to answer," Remus sighed as he watched baby Harry begin gumming on the sleeve of his robes, "but I really am curious why you're trying to spend time with them like that."

"Enjoying their company is not my reason for being in there," Harry at once said with conviction, "but I'm getting a bad feeling of why I am there."

"I get a bad feeling any time you're there," Lily sniffed, though everyone felt themselves tensing up even more at Harry's proclamation. What a way for this book to start, in such an already tense and uneasy atmosphere.

As if these thoughts had been spoken aloud, Vernon chose that moment to speak up and demand to know where their miscreant nephew was?

Petunia returned carelessly not in the house.

Vernon grunted this was a good thing, demanding of no one what that boy was really up to, he did not buy his story of watching the news.

Harry could feel the soft pressure it caused for his memories to be returned, his listening in on this conversation had finally given him a timeline of where in the summer he was, and the heavy sigh he released relieved no one of their worries. It managed to increase the look of agitation on Harry's face as he realized he'd been left to stew in nothing for a solid month with no useful contact from anyone. He threw Sirius in particular a disgruntled look for his letters he remembered from his godfather, then he sat there and really looked at him for a moment with some monster of a feeling telling him he should be valuing any letter Sirius sent him...

The others had noticed Harry, but they figured if he wasn't sharing it was best not to ask as that had only caused him pain in the past.

No normal boy should even be interested in such a thing, Dudley didn't have a clue who the Prime Minister was.

"He says that like it's a good thing," Remus cocked his head to the side in, well more disbelief than usual for Vernon's mental health.

"It does explain a bit about them though," Sirius curled his lip in disgust. "They enjoy their son being as daft as a stick like they are, they hate Harry for not conforming to that."

Vernon continued even louder in disbelief it's not as if his lot would be on the news-

Sirius rolled his eyes in disbelief at such a statement, he'd been on there only two years ago, and now Vernon even knew who he was. It wasn't actually possible for someone to be that dense was it?

"As if he doesn't know better," James snorted in disgust, thinking back to that first book which seemed like a kindness now, and all of their odd mentionings he'd tried to make a comment to Petunia about. He supposed Vernon had simply blocked that from his mind though, puny as it was, he needed the space for all his insults.

but Petunia quickly shushed him as she reminded the window was open.

"These people have far to much concern with being spied on," Lily scoffed in disgust, but she already knew how self important they found themselves.

"Petunia does enough of it," Remus forced something resembling a smile, "I'm sure she's just expecting retribution."

Vernon quickly agreed and silenced himself as another commercial started in their room. Out on the street, Harry was watching Mrs. Figg amble along apparently muttering to herself.

Harry's eyes narrowed in on this, he'd been far too shy when this had first been brought up, and far too out of it when Dumbledore had mentioned it in the last book, but now taking any excuse to not speak of the Dursley's for a moment Harry confirmed, "you said there was a Figg in the Order?"

"Yes," Remus confirmed, "but I'm still not convinced it's not the same one we know. Surely if she's been looking after you all these years, she'd have told Dumbledore about your err, living arrangements in your younger years." His face was murderous by the end at having to phrase a child living in a cupboard in that light, but if he'd actually said the words they'd come out more as a growl.

"I never told her that though," Harry shrugged, "never told anyone."

Lily narrowed her eyes on her son for that, but she blamed the Dursleys more than Harry for that. More than likely he'd been warned with a harsher punishment than no meals, she shuddered slightly at even the thought of that man putting his hands on her son and quickly cut off her train of thought while answering, "yes, well there's still the other things. Those ratty clothes and your very clear malnourishment plus never taking you anywhere while they spoiled Dudley rotten. Surely she'd at least mention that to Dumbledore who would have investigated further."

Harry wasn't as sure, the Dursley's had often spread around he was a sickly kid to excuse his looks and how they couldn't find any clothes to fit him properly, and there really was something nagging at his mind of Mrs. Figg and Dumbledore...but he let the matter go nonetheless.

Harry was more pleased than ever for his concealment, as Mrs. Figg had taken to inviting him round her place for tea when she caught sight of him recently.

Lily gave a soft little sigh of pity for the poor old thing, she probably got lonely especially since Harry hadn't stayed around anymore.

Vernon piped up in the living room again, asking if Dudders was out for tea?

Remus spluttered in shock as he looked at Sirius like he'd spoken Norwegian.

Sirius looked just as disbelieving as he rolled his eyes at what he'd said. "I'll believe Dudley's out having tea with friends when Harry dates Malfoy."

Harry retched at the idea theatrically while laughing along with the others, privately thinking to himself all that he'd already caught Dudley doing that summer when he was supposedly 'out.' His parents really were blind.

Petunia responded with fondness at once of which friend's house he was at tonight, cooing over how many of his little play mates he had.

James scoffed in disgust, he had more reasons than he'd ever dream of hating these stupid in laws of his, but their continued ignorance still chafed him for just how purposefully stupid they were being.

Harry suppressed a snort with difficulty. The Dursleys really were astonishingly stupid about their son, Dudley.

"Yet I'm not even surprised," Remus rolled his eyes.

Harry's cousin wasn't out having tea with anyone, but was instead out with his gang terrorizing all the children of the neighborhood and vandalizing whatever they pleased.

They were all muttering in frustration at this little delinquent, but honestly it was just a nice change of pace to hear he wasn't tormenting Harry as much as he'd seemed to before they weren't putting too much effort into it.

Harry had witnessed it himself while scavenging the streets looking for newspapers.

Sirius finished that a bit sadly, his mind flickering back to his having done the same in Hogsmeade and not appreciating the similarities to him and his godson in these lights. Harry was probably getting just as much food as a few rats at that place as well.

"Why were you scavenging for newspapers?" James asked with a wince, trying to deny he'd been picturing the same thing as Sirius.

Harry chewed on that for a moment, debating whether to tell them and get it over with or let the book tell as it most likely would, but it didn't take much to decide on the first as he explained the lackluster mail he'd been getting from his friends.

There was a moment of shocked silence before Remus shook his head sadly at Harry and said, "I think you're putting a little too much stock into your friends with that. What exactly do you think they're not telling you, Voldemort walking up the street? No, he's in hiding, they can't offer up anymore."

It was clear as day the anger in Harry's tone as he'd explained it, but this explanation didn't simmer him any. "I don't understand why they had to be so cryptic about it though, it made it sound like they knew something I didn't." This usually happened every time he was at the Dursley's, as old feelings never failed to pop up of his years of isolation there and it somehow felt so much worse that summer.

"Is that really safe?" Lily tried to change the subject into something she found far more important. "The only reason you're at that bleeding place is because you're somehow protected at that house, is wandering the streets a good idea?"

"I couldn't be locked up in that house all the time," Harry scowled, "I'd go mad and beg Ron to come get me again. It's Dumbledore's fault for not explaining that to me." He felt a little bad for his petulant tone when he watched everyone around him flinch, clearly they were all fearing some coming attack by Death Eaters now. Harry wasn't afraid of that, if it hadn't happened by now he didn't see why Voldemort's return would suddenly cause it. That wasn't entirely accurate though...had Death Eaters ever shown up in Private Drive? He was getting some interesting feelings trying to flip across his mind. He was in some kind of danger this summer, and he would be getting guests at his house...but then Sirius had kept going and he stopped thinking about it.

Finally the opening music for the local news began, and Harry was instantly on alert. His stomach clenched with anticipation, as hopefully tonight, after all this time...

"What are you hoping to find anyways?" James asked.

"Strange deaths, disappearances, anything indicating what Voldemort's doing," Harry said like he thought that was obvious.

"While I get what you're going for," Sirius shook his head at him, "I think you're getting a bit ahead of yourself. If that's the kind of stuff you were hoping Ron and Hermione would send you, then it's no wonder you're disappointed. Voldemort tries his hardest to keep himself in the shadows as often as possible, it's certainly scarier that way."

"Didn't you notice the pattern last year," James agreed. "Of the people we know he killed, they were all fairly insignificant and wouldn't have taken much notice. The only reason Bertha did was because most likely Crouch, and he had his own reasons to find her and his own secrets to protect, she was sloppy." No one could miss how haggard his face looked in the end as they all remembered who's sloppy kill that was.

"But someone must have some idea of what he is doing," Harry insisted, already realizing he was going to feel bad for the way he'd been thinking of his friends this summer once he'd had this explained.

"Well yes," Remus agreed, "but that's not something you'd put in a letter." Privately he also agreed he wasn't entirely sure if anyone in the Order would tell Harry even if they could. Sirius was the most likely, and they weren't even sure where he was right now. Remus seemed to have just fallen off the face of the earth and wouldn't be telling anyone anything, and clearly Dumbledore was trying to keep Harry out of the loop by having him at the Dursleys for as long as he was.

Harry grumbled a bit more but sighed in agreement.

It started with stranded holidaymakers because of a Spanish baggage-handler strike- but was cut off by Vernon muttering he hoped they enjoyed their siesta.

Lily was fighting back the urge of a few nasty insults she'd like to throw Vernon's way, she wanted Harry to leave this news venture just so she wouldn't have to hear his commentary on every little thing.

Hardly any of that registered with Harry though as he seemed to deflate with disappointment. Bigger news like deaths and destructions would have trumped stranded holidayers.

"While true," Remus agreed, "I'm not sure I understand your disappointment with that."

"Better to know what's going on than this constant wondering and worrying," Harry grumbled.

They wanted to argue the point, but what could they say. They couldn't tell Harry to at least try to enjoy his summer while he could, not where he was. He had nothing to take his mind off these things, and they could already feel the frustration rolling off of him in waves.

Harry forced himself to keep listening anyways, the same pattern as the rest of this summer. Waiting, tension building and expectations running wild until he sat down and heard the nothing, and the questions began again of why nothing had happened yet.

Lily sighed as she wrapped a tight arm around Harry, remembering back to his early days of discovering the wizarding world and how he'd spent his summer days longing to go back to school. She'd rather hear about that than his desire to go chasing after Voldemort.

The rest of the stories held no more intrigue for him, nor Vernon's commentary on it all. Especially the escalation of the drought story and Vernon's waspish comments as he hopped his neighbor heard this one, him with his sprinklers on at three in the morning.

"As if he's not doing the exact same thing," Remus scoffed.

"Actually he wasn't," Harry shrugged, "he treated us all to a lengthy dinner speech about the importance of upholding such laws and he found it befouling anyone would do otherwise."

"Yet another reason I intend on murdering him," James sneered, "torturing you with his arrogant attitude like that."

"Still as pompous an arse as ever then," Sirius rolled his eyes, though honestly he wouldn't be surprised if the man was still a hypocrite and did it without Harry's even noticing.

A helicopter had almost crashed in a field in Surrey,

"That counts as a little strange," Lily offered just to see her son stop looking like that for a moment, though she really didn't think it had anything to do with Voldemort.

"It was because they were training a new pilot though," Harry sighed, "I definitely found that believable enough."

then onto a story of some actresses divorce which Petunia stated shouldn't even be in here, though she'd put her bony hands on every scrap of news she could find.

"So she is a hypocrite," Lily sniffed, though she was well aware by this point.

Finally Harry lost his patience as Bungy the budgie had been trained to water ski!

"That's actually quite talented," Sirius snickered a bit at training a bird to do that.

"Muggle's have the strangest news," James had his head cocked to the side as he heard all of this.

If this had made it in there was no more point in listening, so Harry carefully rolled onto his front and was preparing himself to crawl far enough away from the window before he could stand again.

He hadn't made it an inch when a crack broke the street like a gunshot,

Sirius had never really gotten to a carefree mode of reading, Harry being around these people just made him too uneasy, but now he was reading as tense and upset as if Harry had been around that troll all over again. Anything that sounded like a gunshot couldn't be a good thing.

Even if James hadn't remembered what a gunshot was he would have instantly been as tense and upset as the others just from the way they all were.

a cat streaked out from under a parked car and flew out of sight;

Harry was too busy feeling the echo of adrenaline trying to jump him even if he didn't feel it now to wonder on why he should be thinking of that.

a shriek of fright echoed inside the house, and Harry was on his feet in the same second, unsheathing his wand for a fight.

Remus was far too concerned with the vision of Death Eater's really attacking Harry there to congratulate him on those reflexes.

He hadn't gained his full height yet when his head crashed into something.

Harry hissed and went cross eyed in pain as he rubbed the top of his head, but that still didn't drop the determined look on his face nor how his hand stayed tight around his wand. If he looked like this now with just a delayed after effect while trying not to do anything about it, they could all easily imagine how fierce he looked on the actual situation. It didn't do much to make any of them feel better as they all remembered just how alone he was there.

Harry tried to stagger away and keep his eyes focused on everything, to understand where that noise had come from, but before he'd got his bearings back two hands entrapped his throat from the open window.

For a moment Sirius was convinced someone was squeezing their hands around his throat, his vision blurred out as he saw red then black from what he'd just forced out in shock. There was just no way possible that monster was actually squeezing his godson's throat!

Then a monstrous noise registered, and Sirius wasn't allowed to act on whatever his impulse had been leading him to break because he was flying into action.

"Let me GO!" James continued to thrash no matter how tight the hold on him was. "I don't care if I get knocked out, I'll kill him before I do!"

Remus nearly fell back down the stairs, he'd bolted up there and put the baby down in his crib the moment he realized what all was happening and only just came back in time to try and stop his friend as well. "Think about what your saying Prongs," Remus begged, trying to stay in his face while avoiding the thrashing limbs. "You won't get a foot when Harry's going to have to drag your arse back here, and what if it's worse this time-"

"I don't care!" James howled, his elbow now slamming repeatedly into Sirius' ribs as he kept trying to make his way to that bleeding door.

Harry watched with horror at this reaction, which finally wore off when his fingers started grasping at the handle, so he darted forward to try and say his part, "Dad, please, it-"

"AND YOU!" James snarled, his face the deepest shade of red as his wild eyes flashed between the door and his son now. "You lied to me! You said they never put hands on you!"

"I said they never left a bruise," Harry quickly corrected.

He blinked as all three of them froze in what they were doing and just stared at him, Sirius arms even went slack and James clearly didn't notice.

James stood there, vibrating in place as he snarled, "lying by omission is still a lie Harry! The bloody hell, how many times had he done this!?"

Harry was frowning in concern, rocking on his feet as he watched him with unease, but when he failed to answer James made a guttural, maddening sound as he stormed away, at least in the opposite direction up the stairs. He shoved a vase off a stand on the way, though as Lily noted when she darted after him it had been a gift from Petunia so it seemed fitting.

The last thing the three at the bottom of the stairs herd was a few more objects breaking and Lily crying, "no, James, not that one!"

Harry's face was stark white in shock as he whispered, "he's really mad at me."

Remus and Sirius exchanged a broken look. Neither of them were feeling much calmer than their friend, but the terror now written on Harry was doing a pretty good job of reminding them they shouldn't try and mimic his actions.

"Not you," Remus sighed,

"-by much," Sirius muttered.

"but Harry, what were you thinking?" Remus quickly moved past that sense it only made Harry look even more upset.

"I just," he threw his hands up in the air in frustration, his mind scrambling as he tried to come up with a way to make them see. "You guys have to understand I never told anyone about this, anyone. Not Ron, it just-" he sighed and flattened his hair onto his head for a moment, starting to pace and still throwing panicked eyes at the stairs where now no noise at all could be heard.

Sirius sucked in a deep breath, watching Harry pad back and forth for several more beats before saying, "I get that. It took me ages to tell James what my mum did to me."

Harry paused then, watching Sirius with dark weary eyes. Sirius leaned back against the stairs banister, trying for all the world to look casual as he said, "I grew up a nosy little child, always asking one to many questions, and my mum hated that. She always said I was never a proper Black, and she tended to curse me for it, a lot. Her favorite was to use the Transmogrifian Torture, it popped a limb out of socket and she'd leave it like that until I properly apologized and said I'd do better and stuff. That never left a bruise either," he finished with a mutter, rubbing absently at his shoulder.

He looked over to see Harry had a new kind of horrified look on his face, and Sirius nodded solemnly as he kept going, "things didn't get any better for me once I started school. My first morning there when she'd found out I was in Gryffindor, she sent me a howler so bad it made what Neville's Gran and Ron's mum sent look like a love letters. I ran out of there trying my damndest not to cry, and James caught up to me and demanded to know what that was about. I didn't tell him, not really, just kind of fudged around it and we ended up missing our first Transfiguration class, though for some reason McGonagall didn't say anything to me," he added with a rueful smile. "Then Remus let us borrow his notes so that we could do our homework, so it was never even brought up. He wasn't even technically our friend yet."

"I think I just somehow knew I'd better get used to it," Remus said with a roll of his eyes, taking a seat on the steps anyways and propping his head in his hands like he was trying to pretend this was all casual stuff.

Sirius gave him a nudge with his foot before rounding up, "I didn't go home for that Christmas or Easter holiday, but my summer there wasn't pretty. She basically disowned me, swearing up and down I could never make up for this terrible mistake I made." He gave a tragic look to the ceiling, then smirked at Harry before finishing, "a memory I look back on quite fondly now."

They watched Harry for another second, and this time he did open his mouth before quickly closing it, clearly still dithering, so Remus instead said, "my parents are afraid of me."

Sirius had to bite back the instant feeling he had of correcting Remus, he'd only met his parents twice and he'd never gotten that impression, but Remus seemed to feel anyone who wasn't an Animagus was afraid of him no matter what they said. It was one of the reasons he avoided his own dad now.

"What?" He squawked in surprise, looking Remus in the eye to make sure that wasn't some cruel joke.

He just shrugged however, though his fingers fidgeting with the hem of his robes showed his careless tone wasn't really all there as he explained, "well, they certainly never look me in the eye. They asked me if I could even try to stay at Hogwarts over summer break because they realized the school was much better equipped to handle me. During my full moons, they'd shut me up in a room, sort of like they had to do here, and then leave the house for twenty four hours, just to make sure they weren't around for any part of the cycle."

Harry's mouth was actually hanging open in shock now, which only made Remus give a not at all amused smile. "Oh they took care of me after the fact, bandaged me up and all that. I never knew if it was shame, or fear, or something else, but I do know I stopped going around my parents place not long after I left school, and they've never asked me over since. Last time I saw them was when my Mum passed away and I honestly thought when I was asked up to the hospital it was a joke."

Harry seemed to realize he was staring then, and quickly closed his mouth, but at least this time he didn't turn away from them and instead ran his hand through his hair some more as he said haplessly, "I, don't know what you want me to say. He throttled me sometimes, but only when I was much younger, when my magic was really obvious. He only did it till I went slack, and I learned to do that pretty fast, then he'd lock me in my cupboard until he'd decided I'd learned my lesson. It never did leave a bruise," he emphasized, now rubbing absently at his throat in remembrance.

"How come you never went to the police, told someone," Remus asked gently.

Harry rolled his eyes at what he felt was an absurd question. "Even if I'd had the gall to, which I didn't as Vernon terrified me through most of my younger years, I had no proof, which he'd occasionally point out whenever someone looked at me on the street to long. You think I didn't notice that Dudley and I were clearly so different from each other. But Vernon always said that if I ever said a word about how they'd dealt with any of my weirdness, I couldn't prove it. They'd say that Dudley's second bedroom was mine, and they really only did take food away from me whenever my magic was acting up, never so much I was malnourished."

He paused then, a calculating look on his face as he added, "I don't really think Petunia or Dudley knew, or if they did they didn't care. Petunia was certainly all for the food part though, so I may not put it past them."

Harry looked back to see that a nerve was thumping in both of their jaws, and he was quick to tack on, "he really did stop after I turned eleven though. He was definitely to afraid of my magic, and it really wasn't that frequent."

"And your twelfth birthday," Sirius managed to get out in a steel tone.

Harry flattened his hair with nerves, but at this point recognized there was no reason not to tell them. "Okay, yeah, he did it then until I did pass out. Woke up in the bathroom and they wouldn't let me out until Vernon had put those bars on my window. They've got their own bathroom in their bedroom, so it hardly put them out."

He crossed his arms defensively when they just kept staring at him. "What? What I just said isn't nearly as bad as what you two had."

While they weren't exactly going to argue with him over such a topic it hardly made what he did say feel better.

Up the stairs in their room, Lily watched James collapse on the bed. He'd taken his glasses off first, so that he could press his hands so hard into his face, his palms digging into his eyes, he looked like he was trying to gouge them out.

"James," she whispered, sinking down beside him, but completely at a loss for words.

"I can't stop seeing it," he got out through a restricted throat. "The cupboard, Pettigrew, Harry watching Cedric get murdered right in front of him, now this. I'm fighting this war to try and save my only child, and at this rate my dying feels about as useful as my life."

"Don't-" she begged at once, her hands latching onto his, trying to pull them away, but he still managed to keep going, "I couldn't even save you. You're the one who saved Harry, I just got tossed aside like the useless thing I am-"

"James, please, you can't be thinking like that." She cut him off, nearly begging to try and get him to stop. She had to tug hard for a moment, but finally his hands slid away to reveal bloodshot eyes. She stayed leaning over him, hazel matching green as she whispered, "don't you think I'm feeling the same way. She was my sister James, and she's doing this to my baby, but don't you start talking like that now. We will find a way to fix this, make it so that Harry never has to be without us again."

James gave a derisive snort, his eyes still vacant as he whispered, "some dad I'd turned out to be anyways, Harry's been lying his arse off since he got here, and did you see that look on his face. Now I've scared him senseless, I'll be lucky if he doesn't look at me the way he does Vernon now. Should probably just hand him over to Sirius already and be done with it for all the-"

Lily popped him on the forehead, and when he only winced but kept at his insane mutterings, she smacked him, hard.

"James, listen to yourself," she pleaded. "If Harry doesn't understand why you were so upset then that's because he's never had his father around to be upset on his behalf, but he could never put you and Vernon in the same scope of his life. You're too good a person, and he knows that."

His face twitched, like he wanted to believe her but couldn't quite grasp the emotion yet, so she kept going. "And if you actually think Harry would replace Sirius with you if he had the chance, then you really need a reality check. They both love you, and they need you. It's a damn cruel world where Harry's from that you're not in the picture, but both of them would do anything to change that."

He closed his eyes then, his jaw still shaking, a few tears managing to escape, but at least for a moment Lily had seen the flash in him like he believed that.

There was silence for a long time between them, Lily not moving a muscle and James trying to get his under control, until finally he took a careful breath in through his nose and releasing it through his mouth before whispering, "I love you."

"I love you to," she said back at once.

He opened his eyes then, watching her for several more beats before moving like he was going to sit up. Lily sat back and let him, but she was at once buried into his chest as he wrapped his arms as tight around her as he could. "What did I do to deserve you?" He muttered into her hair.

"If I figure it out, I'll let you know," she returned, snuggling him for as long as they both needed, before he took another deep breath and whispered;

"Guess I should go back down and face them."

"They're all worried sick about you," Lily said at once. "You looked likely to jump through a window when you came pelting up here."

He made an odd noise, one Lily couldn't decide if it was in agreement or protest, but then he took to his feet, put his glasses back on, and started for the door, her hand still tightly in his, their rings pressed together.

As they came back down they saw Remus had to hop out of the way, and quickly took in the other two. Sirius who was an ugly gray but trying to pretend he was acting normal, and Harry's arms crossed and still looking defensive. It did not improve his mood that when Harry saw him, his foot looked like he wanted to take an automatic step back, but he met his eyes and at once whispered, "I'm sorry."

James opened his mouth, couldn't think of anything to say, closed it, and walked past him back to the living room. Lily met her son's eyes as well, but didn't release her hold on James and instead hissed something at him as James made for the recliner. He didn't respond, instead sinking down into that and pulling his wife with him. She perched on his lap, giving him a look that said plainly she did not approve of his actions, but when he wrapped his arms around her waist again and didn't look up to moving, she just rolled her eyes and looked back towards them expectantly.

"He's mad at me," Harry murmured for Sirius and Remus' ears alone.

"Only for the next hour or so," Sirius waved it off. "I pissed him off real good when I denied what my mother had been doing to me for most of my childhood. These two asked me a lot of the same questions they'd been asking you when I came back from holiday, and I gave a lot of the same answers. Didn't admit to it all till I ran away, and even while he was helping me unpack he was ribbing me."

"If there's one thing you want to do to piss Prongs off, it is lie to him," Remus nodded in agreement. "When he found out how long I'd gone without telling him about my being a werewolf, he was really ticked, so much so he went and did something illegal," he finished with an amused smile, causing Sirius at least to laugh.

Harry did not join in, still watching his dad with clear guilt on his face, but followed the other two as they went back into the room as well. He stood in the doorway, and finally he couldn't take it anymore. He'd never in his life imagined his father so angry with him, and the rejection trying to well up inside him and cast a new shade of light on every good memory he'd collected so far had the words bursting out of him before he'd considered them. "I'm sorry, alright. I'll tell you, I promise-" he tried to think of some way to begin, but the words failed him, so honestly stalling for time he finished in a whisper, "after this chapter's over."

James only hesitated a beat, nodded to indicate he'd heard, but still didn't unbury himself from Lily's back.

Harry quickly shuffled to the farthest sofa away, trying to curl himself into the cushions and looking anywhere but at his parents.

James had his face pressed into Lily's spine, doing a terrible job of pretending he wasn't paying attention to any of them, while Lily was giving him the stank eye over her shoulder but clearly wasn't moving until she saw something else.

Remus and Sirius exchanged uneasy looks, but finally Remus sat down next to Harry and Sirius went back to fetch the book. The last thing he actually wanted to do was go back and see how long Vernon had his hands on Harry before his little pup passed out, for all he knew he'd barely get a few more words in before he incited rage all over again from himself and James. Normally this would be the time Harry would step in, read for them as a reminder he was fine, but for now he was pretending to be invisible.

It also occurred to all three of them that they'd had this conversation when James and Lily hadn't even been here, so they'd never even gotten their sons full confession. Remus and Sirius locked eyes, knowing now probably wasn't the time, but hopefully by the end of this chapter everyone would be at least a bit calmer and they'd convince Harry to tell Lily and James what he'd told them. Sirius fidgeted with the page for a long time, before finally the silence dragged on and he felt he had no other choice but to keep going.*

Vernon was snarling into Harry's ear to put that thing away before anyone saw it!

Harry tried to pry his fingers away, telling him to get off, all while keeping his wand steadily pointed.

Sirius' fingers were so tight around the book they were beginning to hurt, but he couldn't release his hold one little bit, he was too busy picturing them being around Vernon's neck.

The pain of it all piqued, and Vernon yelped as he removed himself from Harry.

Remus wasn't even distracted by the coppery taste of blood in his mouth from biting his tongue to stop himself uttering a string of constant curses, his own throat vibrating violently already showing how he felt about having to imagine that being done to Harry. The very worst part was, this still wasn't the worst thing happening. There could still be danger around Harry, and Vernon was merely causing a fatal distraction.

An invisible force seemed to have surged through his nephew, making him impossible to hold.

Lily's face was ghastly white as that image kept floating just behind her mind's eye, blocking out her once peaceful living room and adult son trying to burrow himself out of sight behind Sirius and into the couch. How many times had this happened in his youth? Often enough it was clear this was a common reaction of Vernon's to begin throttling Harry, even in plain view of the street like that. Had his accidental magic ever kicked in before? Or had he never held on so long this happened? She hardly wanted answers to any of these questions, she was still likely to vomit and start skinning that walrus already with her own.

Harry stumbled out of the plants and forced himself to remain on the rest of the street, but there was no sign of any person to have made that noise. There were people starting to peek into the street.

This only reinforced what Lily had just been thinking though, and now she couldn't shake the thought! How on earth was that excuse- that was such a blatant sign of abuse and surely someone had just seen it as the neighbors were looking around. Did everyone in that neighborhood care so little about Harry's well being because of the Dursley's lies no one was going to do anything about this!

Harry stuffed his wand hastily back into his jeans and tried to look innocent.

Harry glanced half hopefully at Remus or Sirius, like he was hoping one of them would make a joke at his expense, but neither of them did, they were still too pail from anger to take the bait. Both were thinking of themselves in the future, what they wished they'd already done to Vernon but each having never done so and neither finding it excusable.

Vernon began playing it off at once, waving cheerfully to all and shouting about some car backfiring.

James still had his face buried in his wife's hair, though the fiery color was doing little to improve his mood it still held the only comfort he could find at the moment, and was far to distracted to ask what on earth that could mean in any relation to the noise Harry reacted to. He was just more disgusted Vernon was playing off his own moment.

He continued to grin in a horrible, manic way,

"I've never seen him grin like anything else though," Harry grumbled softly, as the silence apart from the violent reading was starting to freak him out. He'd grown far to used to the constant flow of commentary, and had learned that long lapses in silence like this were usually at the worst of times. He didn't agree this leveled up with other moments.

until the other faces vanished. Then his grin flipped to rage as he beckoned Harry back to him.

Harry flinched in shock at the eruption of growls in the room, but at least this time he understood why. He hadn't wanted to be back in arm's reach of Vernon then either.

Harry only moved a few steps closer, being careful to remain out of arm's reach.

It was highly unlikely before this moment that the Dursleys were going to live much longer when they were released from this place, but now whatever wavering may have persisted at Harry's words wouldn't even hold. It was utterly astounding he'd ever done so when he clearly had memories of this happening to him in his younger years!

He hissed at Harry what he meant by it?

"I hope he had the bleeding piss scared out of him," Remus hissed, choosing to focus on the disappointment this moment didn't cause Vernon heart failure rather than the still lingering fear of what was going on to start this.

Harry asked what he meant while still investigating the street for the noise that had started this.

Despite James' hands still wrapped tight around her waist, Lily was still fighting the urge to go over to her son right now and have him in her arms to make absolutely certain there wasn't anything wrong with him because of this instance. To run her hands gently over his neck, to be where he was and be just as certain no one was going to harm her son while he was surrounded by all those Muggles.

He furiously retorted Harry had made that sound, but Harry interrupted he hadn't done that.

Petunia's face appeared next to Vernon's now, demanding to know what he'd been doing outside their window then?

Sirius had to work furiously with himself not to give some waspish reply, that was far to similar to how his mother had treated him in the house he'd grown up in. Treating every room that wasn't his as if Sirius were trespassing in it.

Vernon at once agreed with his wife, she'd made a good point.

James felt his lip curling up in disgust, did that man have a single brain cell of his own?

Harry sighed before answering, and the two exchanged a look of outrage.

Harry almost laughed as he remembered those looks as compared to the ones his family still had in place. Vernon and Petunia had nothing on outrage when it came to them.

They demanded why he was doing this again, and Harry reminded it changed every day.

That did it. Harry's unexpected comment cracked Remus and he snorted in surprise but just as quickly tried to stifle his giggling. It wasn't hard, he could still feel bloodlust wanting him to curse something into oblivion, but at least Harry met his eyes and grinned back which made it worth it.

Vernon snapped at him to stop lying, his lot did not get onto their news!

Petunia whispered at his side to be careful, the neighbors could still be listening.

Lily rolled her eyes and tisked in disgust. She didn't care it was nearly fourteen years later for the man, he knew perfectly well her lot did in fact end up on the news from time to time, it had been what had drawn the man to question Petunia about Lily's whereabouts all those years ago. Either he'd blocked the memory or he'd forgotten, either way she no longer needed an excuse to find anything he said or did the lowest form of stupid.

Harry shot back that's all they knew.

The two exchanged a look again before Petunia called him a liar. He shouldn't have need of their news, he got his own from those owls.

"Because Merlin forbid he just get letters from his friends," Sirius muttered tersely. His knuckles still white around the books edge and the fearsome tone of his voice hadn't dropped one bit and Harry was starting to grow worried that none of them seemed to be breathing normally for a while now.

Harry hesitated responding, it pulled at him to tell the truth this time,

"Why do you bother!?" James couldn't stop his snap of outrage, but either Harry was expecting it this time or he just rolled with it Harry didn't flinch this time before answering calmly, "I rarely see a point in lying if I can help it." He did finish on a wince though as all of them gave him looks of disbelief for that, considering his lie by omission was a part of the reason everyone in here looked more than angry. He sighed and muttered something, but was sick of lingering on this topic so shot at Sirius, "do you want me to read through this part?"

"No," Sirius snapped right back, turning his boggling eyes away from Harry for now and effectively hiding a tint of hurt now. He couldn't help it though, he seemed to go out of his way to tell those Dursleys the truth as often as he could, but wouldn't for them? In his time or now?

but finally he admitted those owls weren't bringing real news.

Both snapped they didn't believe him at once.

"Don't see the point of telling them the truth when clearly they think he's lying about everything anyways," Lily was still hissing under her breath so low only James could hear, and he was in full agreement.

Petunia said she knew he was up to something,

"Like what exactly?" Remus rolled his eyes in contempt.

"Don't know, never asked for details," Harry said with a happy enough smile, at least someone was trying to push back into playing this off even if every part of Remus clearly didn't feel it. Harry was honestly wishing Remus hadn't put the baby away now, even that little infant would have helped them feel better.

and Vernon added on they weren't stupid.

There were several colorful comments each of them could have made to that, but considering Vernon would have long since died before this conversation had taken place if any of them had had their way besides Harry, Sirius didn't bother listening to the variety and instead kept up his lackluster reading in hopes this chapter would just end. Anger and worry were still at war with each other over Harry's predicament, and he wanted some kind of proof his little pup wasn't about to be attacked right there on the street and that Vernon was going to have his hands removed soon, not necessarily in that order.

Harry snapped back that was news to him!

Remus couldn't help it that time, he did manage a soft laugh under his breath for Harry's wit, but he was still the only one.

Harry couldn't help rolling his eyes at what he was now considering an overreaction from everyone else. He was fine, and if they really wanted another apology he'd give it just to stop all of this ugly silence and silent death threats he could still feel pulsing through the room.

He didn't wait for a response, but instead stormed off before either of them could call him back and was soon at the end of the street.

Lily blinked spastically for a moment as fear finally trumped anger. Harry was only at that place because apparently it was safe from dark attacks, but now he'd up and left with the noise of an apparition still going unexplained. Exactly how far was that protection magic around number four? Just the house, the street? Yet for even a second to turn around and say she wanted Harry to stay at that house for a moment longer would always feel wrong, it really spoke volumes she'd prefer Harry's chances with a dark wizard rather than her sister and husband in law.

He was in trouble now and he knew it.

Remus was dying to ask Harry what he defined as 'trouble' with those people. Another round of strangling? Harry'd made it clear it wasn't that common, but now he truly was in the dark of how much Harry could be leaving out there. Sirius was still reading every word as a death sentence and very clearly wanting to finish this, and since Remus was well aware Harry wasn't getting out of this conversation again at the end of the chapter he didn't bring it up for now.

He would have to face his aunt and uncle later and pay the price for his rudeness,

Sirius couldn't take the suspense anymore and did ask, "pay what price exactly?"

Harry wanted to sigh and roll his eyes, try and play this all off or just ignore it like he had in the past, but at this point he was sure that wouldn't help any. He didn't see how telling them the entire truth would make it much better, but he wasn't sure it could get any worse either. "Threats mostly, he knew he couldn't do anything to me, even if he knew I wasn't supposed to be doing magic he was still afraid I would after Marge. Locking me in the shed mostly, he even kept the padlock all nice and polished," he finished with a forced laugh like looking back made it funny rather than as menacing as he'd honestly found it, but he'd instead been right the first time, several disturbing noises promising more violence and more death glares at the door showed his honesty had won him nothing.

but he didn't care at that moment, his mind still on other matters.

That cracking noise was one made when someone Apparated, or Disapparated.

Harry was still very distracted by the tension that had practically taken up a seat in this room, and he had no want to think about the tingling feeling saying he could have a gut answer to that question.

No one else had really forgotten what had started the instance either, and honestly fear was starting to trump outrage. None of them could wait to start wringing Vernon's neck themselves, they'd probably have to find an object to do so considering their hands wouldn't wrap around but that wasn't the point. Now though, now that Harry was away from him, the reason he'd left was hovering in the forefront just waiting to pounce on their aching hearts. Most likely it was a Death Eater coming for Harry, and he'd now left the only protection he'd had.

Harry may not have understood why as he wasn't fearing the same thing, but he was relieved when Sirius finally started reading in less blood thirsty tones and hoped he'd finally switch back to at least semi normal.

It was exactly the noise he'd heard Dobby make, and suddenly wondered if it was the house-elf that was the cause of this?

Lily could tell she was the only one who was desperately hoping for that to be the answer. The other boys were all still too upset to even consider any kind of good option other than an attack waiting, but Lily was honestly hoping now it was Dobby with some cryptic new message. She'd take that over a fight for his life as strung out as she was right now.

Could Dobby be invisible right now following him? Harry suddenly whirled on the spot like he expected to see the tiny creature hovering right behind him, but still there was nothing, and Dobby could not become invisible.

Harry was looking on at nothing in a funny sort of way, his face twisted as he was so sure he was moments away from realizing something, about being followed by invisible-

"Not invisible," Remus agreed uneasily, "but you do know he can hide at least in a bush." His thoughts were hovering the same as the other boys, that a wizard could be hidden even more easily. Though it did beg the question, if Harry was under attack, why the hiding at all? Were they waiting until he was far enough away from Private Drive to attack? It was hard to see another motive when they were all still on the edge of their seat and white faced from anger.

He kept up his trudging pace, paying no attention to his route as he'd traced through these streets so much of late he would often wander to his favorite spots without thinking.

Lily tried to force herself to see some good news in this, that this wasn't Harry's first foray out of that house that summer and he hadn't been attacked yet. Her hand tightened around James' though as her mind just kept offering up more terrible solutions, that he was just being watched, and someone was waiting.

He couldn't stop glancing back over his shoulder, still convinced there was something magical about that noise he'd heard amongst Petunias begonias.

Harry fidgeted with unease as he was just as sure of this fact now, but he felt no impending threat from this like he was now aware those around him did. Yet that didn't stop a trickle of sweat breaking over the back of his neck as he couldn't find it in himself to comfort them either, to promise nothing bad was going to happen this night. In fact he was now fighting back the impulse to take the book away from Sirius again for a wholly other reason, something bad was going to happen to him tonight and he didn't think his godfather in particular was going to enjoy it.

Why hadn't they come up to him?

Remus shook his head in disbelief at Harry as he asked, "did it really not occur to you this could be an attack?"

"Not really," he sighed. "Dumbledore said the only reason I was going there was because it was supposed to be safe."

They wished they had that kind of faith in Dumbledore, but seeing as they'd never once seen that house as any kind of safe none of them agreed.

As his question burned, his certainty faded. Perhaps it hadn't been a magical noise at all, but something perfectly ordinary Harry was trying to see more into.

"Glory Harry, now I know you've been spending too much time with those muggles," Sirius sighed. "Trying to write off our instances as normal things."

Harry finally felt a real smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as Sirius tried for a joke again, somehow it felt better to watch them worry about something they knew he lived through like some impending attack then fear for his health at the Dursleys.

Feeling hopeless and alone, the same thoughts began plaguing him as they had all summer.

Lily felt James twitch behind her, the compulsion to go comfort his son when he heard of that feeling rearing its head and pushing away his own feelings. He sighed deeply, but finally unburied himself from her hair and glanced around at Harry now to see a far away, contemplative look on his face as he rubbed absently at his head while Sirius read, but thankfully there weren't any traces of hopelessness in him now.

Tomorrow the pattern would continue, he'd awake at five o'clock sharp to receive his Daily Prophet, though he often questioned why he continued to bother with the paper as he only took a passing glance at the headline and tossed it in the bin. If the idiots running it finally found news of Voldemort's return, that would be the first page, which was all Harry cared for.

Remus shook his head at Harry's naivety, he was looking for odd instances occurring in the Muggle news but only scanning front headlines of theirs? He was most likely going off his experience last year of the two headlines featuring Barty Crouch and Bertha Jorkins, but those weren't always front cover stories. Sometimes it took a few page flips to find anything remotely interesting other than politics and Quidditch scores. He wasn't going to bring this up to Harry now though, no since in riling him up when soon enough they were going to be hearing more about odd happenings in the book than they already were from their own Daily Prophet from this timeline.

Ron and Hermione would likely send him another letter soon, but they were of no more help.

"News like what?" Sirius couldn't stop himself from asking. "Merlin Harry don't you ever just send fun letters to your friends detailing all the times you've tried to kill your cousin."

Harry just rolled his eyes as he found the question obvious and considered the rest all joking, but he was wrong. Sirius wasn't the only one wondering if Harry would ever get anything resembling a normal life which now seemed laughable with Voldemort's return.

Quoting such things in his head about how busy they were, and they couldn't put much in these letters for obvious reasons, but they promised they'd be seeing him soon.

"That would get on anyone's nerves though," Remus sympathized. "Did they have to be so vague?"

"Wonder why you haven't been invited over to the Burrow yet," Lily agreed softly.

Harry just hummed in annoyed agreement, having no idea why he'd feel like correcting his mother he never made a trip to the Burrow this summer.

That was all that was given though, not a single mention of any specific timeline of when Harry would be joining his friends. He'd picked up some hints that his two friends were together, most likely at Ron's place.

"Now that's just hurtful," Sirius gave an exaggerated pout which was worth it when Harry almost cracked a smile at him. Sirius wanted to still be angry, he was certainly still worried, but Harry was starting to look sickly pale again and he didn't want his pup to be remembering whatever was fixing to happen while still thinking everyone was still mad at him.

It tormented him so much to think of the two having the time of their life at the Burrow while he was stuck here, he'd thrown away the chocolates they'd sent him for his birthday unopened.

"Now that was just hurtful, I don't think I've ever been that mad at anyone."

James still sounded off, but he met Harry's eyes so no matter how much hurt and anger was still there, Harry smiled right back.

He'd regretted it later after the wilted salad Aunt Petunia had provided for dinner that night.

Harry's kindling annoyance was certainly muted from what it had been at the age of fifteen, but it was helping that those around him were finally starting to act at least sort of normal again, so Harry tried not to linger too much on the hurt feelings he remembered feeling from his friends.

Just what were his friends so busy with? Why wasn't he busy with them? Hadn't be proved himself capable of handling more than them!

"What does handling situations have to do with anything?" Lily asked in confusion. "They're not taking Ron and Hermione out on Order missions, most likely Molly's keeping them busy with chores."

Harry at first felt a flash of confusion, like he was quite sure his friends did know something of what was going that he still wasn't privy to, but it was at once drowned out by his certainty that his mother was right and his friends were keeping quite busy and not in a way they were enjoying. It was all very strange considering he still couldn't imagine the Burrow coming into play. In answer, he simply shrugged with some chagrin and said, "well when you put it like that it sounds ridiculous, but yeah that's pretty much what was on my mind. They were out there getting told everything while I was stuck-" he finished with a wince, not having any proper way to refer to the Dursleys anymore without watching them all flash with another bout of anger.

Had they forgotten what he'd done, what he'd been forced to see happen to Cedric while he'd been tied to a tombstone?

Lily felt her throat nearly swollen shut. She couldn't stand just sitting here and letting him go through all that! It was killing her not to ask if he'd talked about this with anyone, but she knew he hadn't, he'd said so himself. The only people he'd ever even remotely brought it up with were Ron and Hermione, and that hadn't been the real talk Harry needed, just his friends listening to him chat about what Voldemort could be up to now.

She took one look at Harry's face though and could tell now still wasn't the time to be bringing this up. Harry's face was still lined with tension as he tried to throw covert looks at his father and was still glancing periodically at the door. Clearly whatever they were trying to prove in showing they were trying to move past that moment wasn't fooling him completely, and bringing back up that graveyard moment would only make him feel worse. She wanted her son to feel safe here, not like she was constantly interrogating him, so it was probably best to wait at least until he was at the Burrow and she could trust Hermione to bring it up for her.

Harry at once cut off that train of thought and scolded himself for the hundredth time that summer.

Sirius read all that with such a horrid wince it looked like his face was going to spasm off, but Harry couldn't think of a word of comfort for him or anyone. He couldn't help what his mind dwelled on, and even without the month long time span in between remembering that and where he was now, he could still remembering what it felt like. It was a mercy being here and not being able to constantly relive that moment like his dreams had been trying to do last night, but at least here he had distractions with his family so he couldn't dwell on that. At the Dursley's he'd had nothing.

It was bad enough he kept visiting the place in his nightmares, he did his best not to think on them in his waking moments too.

Green met green as the two shared a look, Harry trying this very hardest to act like this was no big deal. He was failing, and Lily knew full well what she'd woken him from last night with her gentle touch, but she wasn't going to call him out either as clearly he was not going to have this conversation on top of the Dursleys spit out he was expecting very soon.

None of the boys were remotely surprised either, they'd all heard the noise Harry had been making last night and it really wasn't surprising if they thought about it. His recurring memories would of course bring back the dreams he'd be lingering on when he was that age.

He took a sharp turn and just happened to pass the alleyway he'd first laid eyes on his godfather. Sirius' letters had been just as unhelpful, but at least they were filled more with caution and sympathy with such quotes as reminders to keep himself out of trouble, and he understood this was frustrating to Harry but still not to do anything rash.

Sirius had to work hard at it, but finally he got a tragic look strung across his face before looking around at Harry and demanding, "why do you always take the advice I give you like that? That's sound logic with what I know you get up to."

Harry just gave him an exasperated look back, he wasn't going to explain himself twice and he knew he'd had several mental rants about his godfather as well as his friends. Plus, at least he'd started with the nicety that Sirius understood him.

He'd at least been following that advice, or at least, he hadn't strung his broom to his trunk yet and flown off to The Burrow.

"Honestly you deserve a lot of credit for restraining yourself," Remus chuckled, "I know Sirius himself wouldn't have lasted."

Harry gave an absent smile as he tried to visualize it, but all he was finding was an empty house at the end, which made no sense. Of course the Weasley's would be at their home.

Harry honestly found it galling his godfather giving such advice from the same man who'd broken out of prison to come to Hogwarts and then escaped from there on a stolen hippogriff.

James and Remus couldn't help throwing their heads back in surprised laughter while Sirius' smile turned utterly indulgent.

"Well when you put it like that-" he began to agree, when Remus got a hold of himself and spoke over him, "the best part is, that's still not the most wild thing he's ever done. Don't think we've yet told you about the time a Ravenclaw dared him to tie a string up to-"

"You're going to give Harry the wrong impression about me," Sirius cut him off with a wagging finger and a mischievous smirk.

"What impression would that be?" Harry demanded as he laughed along, finally feeling the releasing tension from his shoulders as they all got a laugh again.

"That I was some scoundrel who deserved that detention," Sirius said, making his eyes go wider with innocence. "I'll tell you that one when I know these two idiots won't paint me in a bad light."

"You know that's never going to happen," James muttered loud enough they all heard anyways, but Sirius kept going with a smug smirk.

He'd reached the park now and sat down in one of the remaining swings, his mind still busy with all of these weighing thoughts. Tomorrow he'd have to come up with some new way to listen in on the news.

"You could always try hanging from the gutters," Remus couldn't help but suggest while he rolled his eyes.

"That's not nearly as comfortable or long term helpful," Sirius shook his head, "though I suppose if the telly's loud enough anyways, he could just lay on the roof, I'm sure he's agile enough to get up there."

"Why do we keep your friends around again?" Lily muttered to James as she watched them have a light bicker over the pros and cons of both while Harry watched indulgently.

"You know you love them," was James' only response. He couldn't decide if he wanted them to stop and keep going so that this bleeding chapter would be done with and he'd feel at least a little better talking to Harry again now that he'd cooled down, or keep listening to something so silly as a kind distraction. Harry made the decision for him.

While it was clear he was enjoying the show, and was the least looking forward to this chapter being over as it would only put him back in the spotlight, he still cleared his throat significantly to at least get past the danger they were all feeling because of that cracking noise still having gone unexplained.

He had nothing else to do after all, even his dreams left him restless. If he wasn't revisiting the graveyard and all that had happened there, he was instead traveling long dark corridors ending in locked doors.

Whatever amusement his pseudo uncles had just given Harry vanished at once as Harry shivered violently. He looked more frightened in that moment then he ever had when realizing what Vernon had been doing to him. Even as Harry tried to shake it off though and just tell the others he truly hated being kept there now more than ever, there was something lingering about Sirius reading about that place...

He supposed those had something to do with the trapped feeling he had when he was awake.

"Well that makes sense," Lily said fairly to try and get rid of at least one of the worry lines that hadn't gone away in ages now in her son.

"You sound like Trelawney," Sirius told her for the soul purpose of switching her worried eyes to being agitated upon him. "Dreams don't mean nothing."

Lily curled up her lip at him, prepared to give a volley of colorful retorts to that comparison, but Sirius promptly ignored her and smugly went back to reading.

The scar on his forehead prickled from time to time to further randomly agitate him, but he hadn't bothered mentioning this to anyone, knowing they wouldn't find that interesting any more.

"Of course I would!" Sirius spluttered at once, any amusement he'd collected for himself vanishing at once. "It means it's bothering you, and less importantly, I get to know when Voldemort's annoyed by something. That all matters very much to me."

Harry studied him for a moment before simply shrugging. He knew Sirius truly was concerned for his well being, but he still hadn't found the need to write his godfather any more than his friends of the annoying pain, it would only make his letters even more repetitious and not even remotely helpful as far as he'd been aware.

He already knew the response he'd get, that it was just going to happen more frequently because Voldemort was back, nothing to worry about, old news.

"You make us comforting you sound so drab," Sirius sighed.

"And I'm confident no one would be telling you that was old news," Lily added on forcefully, she knew no one Harry was sending that information to would just write him off like that.

Remus just winced and chose to say nothing, he couldn't even pretend to say how he'd respond because apparently he didn't exist anymore outside Dumbledore telling Sirius to go find his useless arse.

The injustice of it all welled up inside him so that he wanted to yell with fury.

"I'd suggest letting that out then, alone in the park," James told him. "Better than on someone who doesn't deserve it." Or someone who might resume strangling him because Harry raised his voice. He wouldn't put anything past that monster.

Harry got a rather sheepish look about him though, like he was worried that might be exactly what happened.

He'd been the one to tell everyone Voldemort was back! Yet his reward was to lay around Little Whinging for weeks cut off from the rest of the world, forced to listen to useless news surrounded by dead begonias!

Lily winced at the sharp volume Sirius was using while yelling Harry's thoughts, she honestly believed Sirius was venting a bit of his own frustration in there on Harry's part as he more than likely agreed with Harry's plight. Still, Lily tried to keep up a peaceable conversation, "I thought you said those were hydrangea bushes, not begonias."

Harry gave her a strange look as he said, "there's more than one flower in those gardens."

How could Dumbledore have done this to him? How had his friends forgotten about him here? How much longer was Sirius going to tell him to sit around like a good boy? How much longer until he lost the fight with himself and sent a letter to the stupid newspaper telling them Voldemort was back?

"Well that last one at least is doable just to vent," Remus forced a smile that stuck out more than ever with Harry's seemingly never ending supply of frustrated demands. "Even though it'll most likely be chucked in the fireplace, at least you got all that out somehow."

No one responded, Sirius in particular was still pouting down at the pages that his godson was so clearly frustrated with him and yet Sirius thought Harry was in the right this time. What on earth was Sirius doing leaving Harry at that place? It had been made more than clear he hadn't the faintest idea what went on there, but even if he thought Harry was having the time of his life with those Muggles he would have thought he'd be insisting to Dumbledore to at least let Harry come around to Remus' place by now so that Sirius could visit. Or even the Burrow, since Molly and all the Weasley's most likely knew him now. It really was annoying Sirius as much as Harry the longer he thought about this of why Harry was still there.

These thoughts all continued swirling together in his mind leaving him vacant to the rest of the world as dusk fell around him.

James fidgeted hard, his hands tightening around Lily's waist again in fear that was clearly gripping her as well if her small shivers meant anything. Time was clearly passing Harry by and still no attack had come. What in Merlin's beard had that cracking noise been already? It was going to drive them crazy sitting on the edge of their seats not knowing.

The thing to draw him out of his own thoughts was the sound of many approaching, and Harry looked around curiously to spot a gang all heading home, laughing loudly. At the lead was his cousin, Dudley, as massive as ever, but a year's hard dieting and the discovery of a new talent had wrought a change in his physique.

Remus blinked quizzically, cocked his head to one side, then the other, before declaring, "nope, can't picture it. Here I was thinking he'd break that diet and his pants in his next mention."

Harry smirked a bit, but gave no articulate response. He had no clue what had wrought the change in Dudley to physically better himself, but Harry knew he hadn't considered it much more than what damage it could now do to others which was surely fixing to be explained.

As Uncle Vernon delightedly told anyone who would listen,

"The mailbox then," James snorted in disgust.

Dudley had recently become the Junior Heavyweight Inter-school Boxing Champion of the Southeast.

"I think Harry should actually be terrified for his life," Sirius blinked spastically at the idea. "Teaching that little hippo to punch with accuracy and more power!"

"I still can't wrap my head around him in any training regime," Remus had an odd expression on his face like he wanted to laugh at the idea," but I suppose the best advice always has been play to your strengths."

James shook his head at both of his friends while still vividly imagining all the spells he'd still love to use on Dudley. It didn't matter he was Harry's age, he couldn't picture anyone raising a fist to his son anymore without seeing red and Dudley was still second on the list.

Harry may no longer have been afraid of Dudley,

"Is it because you can set him on fire with a word?" Sirius asked innocently, "because I heard that can instill some real confidence."

Harry gave an easy laugh as he fell into joshing about Dudley, avoiding mentioning that after surviving Lord Voldemort Dudley was more laughable than a hedge.

but he still didn't think that Dudley learning to punch harder and more accurately was cause for celebration.

"I'm starting to wish you had to take psych evaluations before learning to play in sports like that," Lily muttered bitterly, thinking that even if Harry wasn't his victim anymore, most likely Dudley was still bullying others out there with this new found gift.

Neighborhood children all around were terrified of him -

James scoffed in disgust as he pictured it, and how any complaints would go nowhere and the best thing to do would be to call the Muggle police on that boy if there was any luck. Preferably while Harry was not in the vicinity.

even more than they were of that odd Potter kid whom everyone knew attended a center for criminals.

Harry sighed and rolled his eyes as he remembered that stupid lie, but for some odd reason he had a bad feeling about his real school year to come and how it may be worth going to that center to avoid another attendance at Hogwarts this time.

Harry watched them passing by without taking notice of him, and Harry had to fight back the urge to hail them back.

"That would, certainly be, interesting?" Remus said brokenly, unsure if he was supposed to be laughing as the last time Dudley had bothered Harry he'd run off screaming to his mum about Harry setting a plant on fire, and now he'd be doing this in front of his friends. On the other hand, was testing Dudley really the best idea, as surely he would tell his parents and Harry was already in enough trouble.

Harry had an unfamiliar look on his face, but it was only because of the flashing green eyes that set the look off. Otherwise he was practically the spitting image of James, ready to antagonize someone because they'd ticked him off, to vent some of his frustrations when Lily'd just turned him down again. It was an uncharacteristic look for Harry and really showed just how frustrating his being there really was to him for Harry to be trying to vent in this particular way.

If Dudley's friends saw him here alone, they would without a doubt try to come over and start something with him, leaving Dudley in a hard place. He wouldn't want to lose face in front of them, but he'd be terrified of provoking Harry.

Remus rolled his eyes as he at once noticed Sirius adopting the same look as Harry, ready to rile Harry up in this clear display of fun to him, giving no regards to the consequences of what could happen if this played out. Honestly Dudley did deserve the outcome, but Remus still didn't want Harry to take any of the fall which was most likely to happen at the end of any scenario.

Harry would find it the most fun he'd had in ages to watch Dudley's dilemma, taunting him and watching him be powerless, while if any of his friends did try something Harry could draw his wand on them in a second.

Lily huffed and gave Harry the stank eye for that, he knew quite well that he wasn't going to go cursing any of those boys and none of those Muggles would do any more than laugh at such a real threat to them. She understood he was angry but she could think of five other healthier ways than provoking Dudley and she was not happy to be hearing him entertaining this, but she still couldn't bring herself to scold him for it either. Dudley had done quite a lot of damage to Harry and he deserved just a tiny bit of payback, she just wished he'd think about the consequences more than Dudley squirming.

He'd honestly love the opportunity, to torment the boys who'd made his youth hell.

James couldn't help it though, he laughed just a bit under his breath as he was on Harry's side, his sons wit would be worth whatever fight broke out between those boys.

They didn't see him though, and Harry didn't really draw their attention. He had to fight hard against the impulse, as picking a fight would only get him a risk of expulsion.

Harry clucked his tongue in annoyance at what he considered a wasted opportunity, but then why did he have a sudden surge of confidence he did use magic this night...and it involved Dudley.

They began fading back into the night, and Harry watched them go with disappointment as he thought towards Sirius that he'd done as asked, the exact opposite of what his godfather would have done.

All five of them finally gave a free laugh again, not a breath wasted on saying otherwise.

He did rise to his feet once they were out of sight, and began trailing the noise out of sight. Vernon and Petunia thought the best time for Harry to be home was when Dudley was. Vernon had already threatened to lock Harry in the shed if he was late again.

"The worst part is, I now know you're not kidding," James hissed, a fire rekindling in his eyes at that threat.

Harry fidgeted, but remembering his promise, decided against playing it off this time and weakly offered, "Well, it's better then the cupboard right? Probably because I wouldn't fit in there anymore."

"I think I liked it better when you weren't trying to be funny about this," Lily muttered in disgust.

Harry rewound his path back towards Private Drive, passing the now quiet and dark houses that only had little patches of beams to light his way. He liked Little Whinging best like this, when all the neighbors couldn't glance out the window and start muttering about the 'delinquent.'

Lily still couldn't help but clench her teeth in disgust of all of these people swallowing all of the Dursley's lies so easily. Lily could never imagine seeing such a scrawny little kid like Harry next to pampered Dudley and not questioning it, now he'd practically grown up and never had one single person said a word about such a thing?

Harry came to a stop in the shadows when Dudley's gang was departing from him, all saying their farewells to their friend calling him Big D. Harry waited until they were all out of sight and Dudley was on his own before sprinting after his cousin and calling him in the same name.

"You're just begging for that fight tonight," Remus said with resignation.

"Least he was alone now, and not stupid enough to pull anything," Harry half heartedly defended while stopping the trembling of his hand going for his wand now. Every moment that passed left him more sure than ever something was fixing to happen...to him or Dudley. Maybe they really were going to be attacked tonight.

Dudley turned, but turned back away at once when he recognized who it was.

Harry caught up to him anyways and asked how long he'd been going by Big D?

Dudley just told him to shut it.

"And I was just dying to know the answer to that," Sirius muttered belligerently as he flipped the page viciously, his mind's eye now vividly picturing what Harry was heading back towards, and if that cretin put his hands back near Harry again Sirius was going to have a much harder time stopping Prongs a second time.

Harry ignored this and told that he may find it a cool nickname, but Dudley would always be Ickle Diddykins to Harry.

Lily snorted volatility in surprised laughter which quickly dissolved into giggling while the other boys quickly gave a nice laugh for Harry using up Petunia's pet name like that. They were honestly starting to wonder though if they were being paranoid, if that crack really had been nothing. Harry had been alone for hours, far enough away from that house he really would have been vulnerable if anything was going to happen. They were at least trying to force themselves to relax, Harry wasn't in immediate danger, from the outside world anyways.

Dudley repeated shut it, louder.

Harry reminded he never told his mum to shut it, and then further asked if he could at least use Popkin or Dinky Diddydums?

Sirius never would have believed he could read with such blissful happiness once again, but being able to read this after all the horrid feelings he'd already been feeling on top of yesterday's times made this mild taunting feel euphoric.

Dudley said nothing. The effort of keeping himself from hitting Harry seemed to demand all his self-control.

"I never would have bet he'd have so much self control," James smirked, still picturing that fat little blob sneaking sweets from the fridge when he'd been on his diet.

Harry switched though to a less amusing topic, asking who his victim had been tonight? Had he gone after Mark Evans again?

"Evans eh?" Sirius looked up and around curiously.

Lily just shrugged though, saying, "don't ask me, I told you my maiden name's actually a common one. My dad never mentioned any more family to me though, so I wouldn't think there's an actual relation." Her face went an ugly puce color as she remembered that Harry was only there because Petunia was supposedly all the family Harry had left. If she did have some distant relative out there who was of her blood other than Petunia, she still suspected Harry would have been better off with some stranger she'd never met.

Dudley snarled back that kid had been asking for it, he'd cheeked him.

"Clearly not hard to do," Sirius snorted.

Harry asked if he'd been told he looked like a pig in a wig? Because that wasn't cheek if it was true.

Harry felt a small smile as those around him laughed at his humor, they were clearly trying to force themselves to calm down finally after that disastrous blowout Vernon had caused, which made Harry feel all the more uneasy that the true danger was only just getting started.

Harry was watching with high entertainment at the frustration he was clearly causing Dudley, like he was siphoning off his own and passing it along.

Lily ran her hand through her hair with a sigh, accidentally flicking some into James' mouth, still wishing Harry wouldn't do such a thing but at least semi grateful he was doing something about it. It would be even worse to have no release she supposed, she just wished he wasn't suddenly even unintentionally mimicking his father in his school years like all the boys around her were clearly laughing about.

They turned right down the narrow alleyway where Harry had first seen Sirius,

Sirius couldn't stop a little shiver creeping into his tone for realizing that, though he would have thought that was a good thing, such a random mention of that alley way managed to try and spring all his worrying fears of his time in Azkaban. What a stupid thing to be dwelling on now when those creatures were as far away as could be from his pup.

when Dudley suddenly stopped in the dark where the streetlights couldn't reach them on either side, demanding of Harry he thought he was a real big man carrying that thing?

"Can't even bring himself to say wand," Remus rolled his eyes in disbelief at this walking dung bomb.

Harry grinned again as he told Dudley he wasn't as stupid as he looked, but then if he was he couldn't walk and talk at the same time.

"No need for digging into blond jokes there Harry," Sirius critiqued. "I know you're better than that."

Harry pulled out his wand.

"Was just proving a point," Harry quickly said in defense, throwing his hands up in surrender at once of his mum giving him such a look of exasperation.

Dudley looked sideways at it, reminding Harry at once he wasn't allowed or that freak school of his would expel him.

"And wouldn't that just make every one of your coming holidays," James snapped, honestly finding it a miracle the Dursleys never tried to provoke Harry, to find some way to get him expelled from a place they hated so much.

Harry said back slyly that for all Dudley knew, they'd changed the rules.

Dudley said they hadn't at once, but his tone wasn't so sure.

"For all he knows the crazy school of magic burns it's rule book every few months," Remus snickered.

Harry just laughed, and Dudley snarled back Harry was just too scared to take him on without that thing.

"Well can you blame him," Lily grumbled, "he's twice the size of you."

Harry just shrugged though, he hadn't feared Dudley in a long time by that point, and while he still didn't consider himself much of a physical fighter, he was honestly rather confident by this point he could probably take Dudley on if he stayed out of his range enough and made at least one good blow of his own. He'd just never bothered as it still wouldn't win him anything where he was staying that night.

Harry said back with derision that all Dudley needed to beat up kids was four mates behind him. Asking about that boxing title he was so proud of and how old his opponent had been, single digits?

Even James was well aware they put opponents up in better racquets than that, but it still wasn't a nice thought Dudley could be out doing this to such young kids in his own neighborhood which they all honestly believed.

Dudley snarled back he was their age, twice the size of Harry, and out cold for twenty minutes after Dudley was finished with him.

"Was I supposed to be impressed?" Remus mock yawned.

"Weight isn't everything," Sirius sniffed. "I'm sure Harry's still faster than him and Dudley."

Then going on to say he was going to go straight home and tell his dad that Harry had that thing out-

"Running off a tattletale now," James sneered, still fighting back his own impulse to curse Dudley stupid.

Harry cut him off for being so afraid, but Dudley sneered back that Harry wasn't usually this brave at night.

Harry felt himself shiver just a bit, he had a bad feeling where Dudley was trying to go with that crack.

At first confused, Harry returned that it was night now, that's what people call it when it's all dark.

This time no one could wrangle up much humor for that jab, they all remembered what they'd heard from Harry last night and what Dudley may have been hearing for over a month now. However, if he was really fixing to mock Harry for his nightmares, that kid was in for a serious problem from the lot of them, more than he already was.

Dudley snapped back when Harry was in bed.

Harry still didn't get it, asking what he was supposed to be afraid of, pillows?

Sirius managed a laugh, but he was the only one who did.

Dudley said back triumphantly he'd heard Harry all last night whining in his sleep.

Harry mumbled something as he shifted around uncomfortably, not meeting anyone's eyes. He tried to swallow, to say what he wasn't sure, because he only managed to cough and just gave up, waving Sirius on to get it over with.

He didn't want to, this wasn't going to go well.

Harry tried to deny it, but he could already feel it was pointless even as Dudley mockingly quoted Harry about 'not Cedric!'

"How would he, why-" Lily began sputtering in outrage. As cruel a child as she'd always seen Dudley, she never imagined he'd stoop to taunting Harry about this. He was having nightmares about it for crying out loud, surely some shred of humanity must live in Dudley for him to realize this was the very last thing you should ever taunt someone about! Harry's little jabs had been of no comparison to the cruelty of this! Yet she couldn't string all of that together, and Sirius wasn't going to wait for her to as he spewed it all out.

Harry tried to snap that Dudley was just lying, but it wasn't possible, he couldn't know Cedric's name any other way.

Dudley paid Harry no mind, already moving on to whining for help from Harry's parents and how pathetic Harry had sounded.

That one hurt the worst, and the foulest part was Dudley had no idea what he was really mocking. Harry hadn't once mentioned a thing about his parents to Dudley of all people, but the ghostly images of his parents that night haunted him nearly as much as Cedric.

Dudley's cruel laughter was cut short as Harry finally lost his temper, and drew his wand, right for Dudley's heart.

Sirius finally felt some of the heat rushing his face receding in relief. He couldn't stop what he was forcing himself to spit out, mocking Harry like that even if every part of him knew it was technically another person doing it. He'd rather pull off all of his extremities than really hear someone saying things like that to his pup, and was more than pleased to finally find the part where Harry really pushed back.

Dudley backed into the wall in fear as Harry felt the past fourteen years of hatred pounding through him. What would he give to strike Dudley now, have him crawling home from the worst of jinxes, like sprouting feelers.

James hummed in pleasure at the idea of leaving Dudley transfigured for at least a few days, might teach him a lesson or two.

The two began shouting loudly at each other, Harry demanding that Dudley never speak of this again, while Dudley told Harry to put that thing away!

Remus honesty wondered how long this circular argument could last. Harry had the most anger and power on his side, but he wasn't going to put it past Dudley to strike out in fear here soon and Harry may accidentally curse him just on instinct and get himself into some real trouble with the Ministry again.

It ended when both boys shuddered as if icy water had been dumped on them.

"Did you finally do something?" Sirius demanded eagerly, but when he glanced up and Harry said nothing, instead he noticed his pup growing sickly pale, Sirius thought the answer was yes and he was just realizing how much problems he'd just caused himself. He didn't wait around for Lily or anyone else to berate him for what he'd done, Dudley had deserved it.

Harry suddenly blinked in confusion as he glanced around, but it was too dark to see anything, there was no light. The stars, moon, and streetlamps had vanished.

Then the book was suddenly in fear of falling from his too slick hands, icy chills covering him while sweat broke across his palms. He'd recognize that description anywhere, he kept imagining it happening to him in the coming months of his world going black with that cold. The oddity of it didn't sink in though until beside him Remus spluttered in disgust, "what the devil are those things doing there!"

Nobody answered him, no one had even the faintest idea. All Lily and James could think to do was praise Merlin and all their luck in the world Remus had taught Harry to do that Patronus spell so many years in advance, because whatever anomaly had caused dementors to appear in Little Winging right near Harry, it had saved their son's life.

Harry came to his senses first, a flare of protection raising his head as he saw Sirius' plight and tried to reach around and take the book from him, but that snapped Sirius out of it and he clearly wasn't having it. He held it protectively to his chest and gave Harry as superior a look as he could manage underneath that pale skin, "unless you actually died in this chapter from something as stupid as dementors when I know full well you can handle them, you're keeping your paws off this until it's your turn."

Harry rolled his eyes, deciding to leave Sirius be if he really wanted to unnecessarily prove something to them by reading about those things.

There was no noise, no nothing but a biting cold seeping into their every skin.

For a split second Harry thought he'd done something by accident,

Despite her absolute confidence Prongs was going to make an appearance any moment and keep her son safe, it still didn't stop Lily nibbling at her lip in fear of how long Harry was going to have to suffer hearing her scream again before that time came.

then reasoning caught up with him as his brain reminded no wizard was powerful enough to turn off stars.

Remus couldn't help a particularly hard involuntary shiver for that idea, what he wouldn't give some nights to blot out the moon, but it had never really occurred to him that a price that could be paid for that wish was a soul.

Harry began wildly looking around to find them, but Dudley broke his concentration by demanding to know what Harry was doing to him.

James honestly wished it was Harry doing this to Dudley, at least his son doing some sort of magic on Dudley would have been more laughable and entertaining than watching Sirius stutter this out in fear. He really had no clue why Padfoot was insisting he wanted to read about those creatures that more than likely were the star of his own nightmares now.

Harry tried to get him to shut up as he strained his ears, thinking desperately that they couldn't be here, all the while his brain was warning him he'd see them before they arrived.

The problem was they all knew full well Dudley wasn't going to do a thing Harry told him to, Dudley still thought it was Harry doing this, so they all stayed clenched in fear as something new occurred to them. They hated Dudley for everything he'd ever done to Harry, but they'd never wanted his soul sucked out! Harry could certainly fend them off himself, but would he be able to keep Dudley protected as well? He'd kept a hundred at bay before, surely he wasn't about to witness something so inhuman happening to another person now.

Dudley was not listening to a word as Harry was still telling him to shut up, but then they both fell silent as they heard it. The deep, rattling breath trying to take in more than air.

Sirius was doing an unintentionally good impression of that noise in between drawing breaths to keep going. They really worried he was going to run himself out of oxygen in his strive to force himself to keep reading about the demons he kept fearing were going to ruin his life.

Dudley swore one last time if Harry didn't stop it, he'd hit him!

Harry tried one last time to tell Dudley to shut-WHAM.

Sirius hadn't meant to shout that so loud he made everyone around him jump, but he honestly hadn't been expecting that word either. What on earth hit Harry at a time like this? Surely even Dudley wasn't that stupid!

Something violently collided with the side of Harry's head, and little lights popped across his vision as he hit the ground, his wand skittering away.

James felt a snarl of outrage ripping up his throat, of all the times he'd wanted to inflict physical violence on someone rather than cursing them, this now made number one. Of all the times for that idiotic Muggle to be doing this to his son!

Harry called after Dudley what a moron he was,

"My honest sentiments, really you should have told him much sooner," Remus hissed under his breath as he kept white knuckling his wand.

all while scrambling around on his knees to find his fallen defense.

Dudley was paying none of this a mind as he tried to blunder away, but Harry shouted after him he was heading right for it!

Sirius never would have believed he'd feel so much fear galloping inside of him for Dudley Dursley, but there was no way he could deny it was there now. Sirius had never before wished this fate on anyone, even that wretched Muggle, but the absurd imagery of this happening to a Muggle was at least helping to block out his mind's eye offering up the same image happening to him.

Dudley did not respond, instead his footsteps faltered and Harry felt the chill somehow manage to increase. There was more than one.

Lily could feel the scream building up in her throat, still unable to shake from her mind of Harry passing out around these creatures. He'd grown stronger since then, but even staring at her full grown son she still couldn't erase the fear of what those things once did to him.

Harry howled after his cousin to keep his mouth shut at all costs! Then he kept shuffling frantically across the ground, his fingers grasping at nothing but dirt in frustration before shouting on instinct the spell to light it, lumos.

Five inches from his right hand, his wand tip ignited.

Sirius might have felt bad at breaking off there with such a horrible timing, but his gaping mouth wouldn't shut and he was having problems finding his brain to keep going. It had gone from overdrive to off like a switch.

"That was wandless magic!" Remus collected himself first. "Merlin Harry, even the most advanced wizards struggle to do that under extreme pressure!"

Harry cocked his head to the side as he stared at him, something tickling in the back of his mind as he asked, "can't wands do magic without us though? Act on their own to aid."

"I've never heard of that," James came back to himself enough to say, "but I suppose none of us are wand experts either. You'd be better asking Ollivander such a thing."

Lily just shook her head in exasperation at her boy playing off such a moment and trying to divert it back to his wand like that. He really had no clue the potential he'd just enacted in himself.

None of them were quite over their panic, but that had been a healthy kick to make them realize that Harry was going to be fine! He'd take care of Dudley, though the miscreant only just barely deserved it. Surely Harry would be far more concerned for his cousins well being if something had happened to him, rather than still looking curiously into space puzzling his own question.

Harry did not stop to think, grasping it and taking to his feet in one fluid motion to face the dementor.

Sirius honestly wished he could go back and keep talking about all the insane things Harry could start training to do with this newly discovered skill of his, or even have a bloody chat about cabbages if it would get him to stop thinking about these things for even a second now. The only reason he was forcing himself to keep going instead of the cowardly impulses trying to convince him to give these pages up was that Harry was fine. His own plight was going to be worked through, because Harry would get through this.

He shouted the spell to be rid of the creature, but all that came out was a silvery wisp. The spell hadn't worked right, and it was getting harder every second to concentrate.

James felt as if those own slimy fingers were gripping tightly against his own heart. He couldn't shake the image that Prongs was failing Harry now, of all times! It may have been Harry's magic and panic that was causing him to stumble over this, but he was Harry's guardian, that couldn't be a coincidence!

The laughter began in his head, shrill, high-pitched . . .

Lily had to resist the urge to press her hands over her ears like a child so as not to hear this next part. Her pleading screams mixed with that high cold laughter, James trying to save them with some time that would all fail...

The rancid smell of the dementors breath was filling his brain, slowing any train of thought, he could not think of a single happy thing. The laughter changed to the icy voice of Voldemort as the dementor grasped his neck, the echoed words from his nightmare repeating again for Harry to bow to death.

Then Lily's trembling fingers truly did fly up, to cover her mouth to smother a gasp of fear. Her mind simply wouldn't process past the muddle of shock that she was no longer her son's worst memory, her screams would never haunt him again, and yet was this truly better? There was no such thing as a good worse memory, but somehow, in some twisted way, at least in that one she hadn't just died to save her son only for it all to have gone to waste in Voldemort's return. No, at least the vision Harry would have now was his parents truly being able to rescue their child. It would hold no real comfort to anyone, not even herself, though she had not a clue if the boys were even processing all of this in the same way she was, they were all looking ready to jump to their feat in moments and Sirius was going to keel over from forcing himself to read about this dementor experience replaying such a thing!

Harry was sure his last thought would be he'd never get to see Ron and Hermione again, and like a shot of fresh air their faces flashed across his eyes and he finally shouted Expecto Patronum.

It finally worked properly, as the silver stag ran free.

Sirius actually sagged back into the cushions with relief as finally Harry found his friends faces. He'd be safe now, he'd found his will, now all that was left to worry about was Dudley, still an odd enough concept he kept back those poisonous thoughts trying to cloud his own mind.

It's antlers caught the Dementor in the place where the heart should have been;

Remus found a laugh somewhere in him that still came out too strained, but he'd never deny he loved that mental imagery.

and before he had a moment to breathe he ran off in search of Dudley, who was curled upon the ground, his arms clamped tight as could go around his face.

Harry blinked in surprise as he wondered if that was instinct, or Dudley had actually been trying to listen to him. He had no clue, wasn't going to ask, and had no doubts he never did ask Dudley about this experience.

The second dementor was over him, prying his arms apart easily, almost lovingly.

Lily felt her nails digging into James' arms still wrapped tight around her waist, that warmth needed now more than ever as she forced away the image of that being Harry again! How many times had a dementor nearly taken his soul? What would he be if not for Remus? She was more grateful than ever when Sirius found his breath back and forced himself to keep going.

The stag had not yet vanished, instead Harry urged his magical guardian to rid this one as well. Once the creature had vanished as well, the lights began to reaper, and the silvery form flickered, then too went out.

The relief flooding the room was nearly visible, none of them had felt any such thing in what felt like years though honestly they'd just started this book. The trauma of what Vernon had physically done to Harry stacked on top of another near death experience all combined into one thing really was too much to process all at once!

Little Whinging came back to life around him as if the dementors had never been here. Harry's reality was slamming back into him just as quickly, his sweat soaked shirt clinging to him, and his mind screaming the question of why they'd been here to begin with.

"I'm still remembering how to breathe properly from you surviving it, haven't quite gotten to the processing of why's yet." James croaked, keeping his head rested on Lily's shoulders and her curled tight into his chest while he kept a steady eye on Harry. No matter how angry he ever was at his son, it would never trump the sheer pleasure of seeing him alive in this room.

Dudley lay curled on the ground, whimpering and shaking. Harry bent down to see whether he was in a fit state to stand up,

Remus honestly wouldn't believe so, dementors affected Muggles much more physically than even wizards as they had absolutely no magical ability to fight them off. It would be an honest miracle if Dudley was even still awake instead of passed out on the pavement.

but then he heard loud, running footsteps behind him.

Sirius felt like his spine was going to snap in half he suddenly tensed so hard, his mind filling with images of the Death Eater who had sent those dementors there for Harry, and now preparing to finish the job! Only the tiny little print could distract him from such horrid visions that just couldn't be worse than that.

Harry turned back on instinct, raising his wand again, before Mrs. Figg came panting into sight.

"Oh!" Lily felt almost dizzy from too many things happening back to back, and that random muggle appearing like that certainly was just another level of odd.

Harry could understand his mother's suddenly faint look, his own mind was already starting to feel bogged down with shock at so many things happening to him in this one night, and it wasn't over.

He at once tried to tuck his wand back away, but Mrs. Figg shouted at him for being an idiot trying to put that away, there could be more! She was going to kill Mundungus Fletcher!

"Did she really say that?" Harry yelped fiercely, tugging the book away from Sirius who was honestly relieved to have the bleeding thing out of his hands by this point. "You guys mentioned him as a member of the Order before, as well as Mrs. Figg. There's no way that's a coincidence, which means they must be the same people you know as I do. So this means the Order-"

"Don't change the subject Harry." James told him with a far sterner voice than Harry had yet heard. He honestly felt like taking another step back, never having felt so much like a scolded child. "You promised, now is the chapter over?" James couldn't care one lick what the Order was doing in that moment, or anything else in the world for that matter.

He sighed as he closed the book for answer. He still thought them being honestly ridiculous about all this, he found discussing this groups members and what this could potentially mean for plans against Voldemort far more important, but he also recognized there was just no point in delaying this anymore. A promise was a promise.

"Yes, alright, so sometimes they did things like this, but it never, you know-"

James couldn't help but cut off, his temper still getting the better of him. "No, we don't know, and it's high bloody time you told us!" The only thing stopping him from going and throttling Vernon this second, even if his hands wouldn't fit he'd find a way, was the stupid bloody magic keeping them locked in this house!

Instead of feeling outraged, or even making a move to stop them, Harry just sighed miserably. He'd known this day would come, the book wouldn't just keep glossing over everything, but he really didn't want to get into this! It was over and done with, they really couldn't do anything to him now, and what they had done had never been anything awful enough that he had ever considered telling someone, let alone running away. Even what Marge had done back when he was thirteen had hurt him so much deeper than any physical blow Vernon or Petunia could duel out.

Still, glancing around at all of their haggard faces, he decided it was high time they knew anyways. What's done is done, now and then, so him telling his family wasn't going to make anything any better, honestly it was probably going to make it worse, but he told them anyways because he felt like they deserved to know. Sirius and Remus had told him things about their past, honestly it only seemed fair to divulge something so minor to him.

"Okay, yeah, sometimes they did stuff like this. I meant it though, they never left a real bruise! Sometimes he'd cuff me upside the head when I said something he didn't like, Dudley pushed me around a lot, she swung at me with what ever was in her hand because I'd asked to do something she didn't like, just little stuff like that."

Lily had to very carefully bite her tongue for fear of mimicking James and cutting Harry off when he was finally speaking about this, but she still in no way considered any of that little stuff.

"When I got older, they all pushed me around, reaching out and grabbing me, usually by the arm, and dragging me along if I was caught doing something they didn't like, then they'd shove me in the cupboard and yell at me. I think that's what he was doing now, just reaching out and grabbing hold of me, trying to get me to stop doing something he was afraid of. When I was really little and did some accidental magic, it scared Vernon so much sometimes he'd choke me until I went limp and fell down, but it never left a bruise because he never hung on that long. Just enough that I didn't fight him when he threw me in the cupboard. That's another thing, when I got older I realized they were afraid of me." He paused for just a moment with his head cocked to the side, though this revelation was no longer new to him it still seemed to stun him just saying it aloud.

"They wouldn't ever really do anything too bad to me, because they were afraid of my magic, even when I didn't know I had it. So they never would have done anything to bad to me, because they probably thought I could magically retaliate. Besides, even if they had done something worse, I knew it would be pointless to complain about it, because they were always spreading around the rumor that I was an odd and troubled kid that they kept 'out of the kindness of their hearts.' So if the neighbors saw or wondered anything, they put it down to just 'those poor Dursleys having to deal with a criminal in there house.'"

He seemed to find that conclusive enough he'd be happy to move on, but none of them really felt yet like this was just a matter to move on from. Those Dursleys had abused Harry, physically and mentally, and it was their reasoning and lies that had stopped him from telling anyone or anything being done about it.

Voldemort was a ruthless mass murderer who had made it his mission in life to eradicate a large portion of the population, and they were fighting him because what he was doing was wrong. Then he'd turned his sights on the Potters, and he was not going to get away with that, and still this was different. It wasn't possible to hate two singular people like the four of them did, but Vernon and Petunia were going to pay for what they'd done to Harry.

"I'm guessing you never mentioned a word of this to me?" Sirius muttered morosely, unable to kick out the twisting of hatred for himself he was feeling that Harry didn't know him that well. If only he hadn't been so rash in going after that rat that night, if he'd just stuck around and been there for Harry none of this would have happened to his pup.

Harry shook his head vigorously at once, looking at him like he'd lost his mind. "I didn't need to know you long to know what a terrible idea that was. You needed to be as far away from me as possible, and you knowing about any of that would have made the opposite happen. You moved into Hogwarts backyard because my scar twinged, what on earth would you have done if I ever mentioned this."

Sirius had to breathe carefully through his nose to not start shouting at Harry about that, it should have been his decision, but still he pressed, "not even Dumbledore though? Come on Harry, McGonagall or someone?"

"Did you?" Harry shot back with a triumphant look, clearly already knowing the answer even before Sirius winced and looked away.

Harry looked around at all of them one more time, putting a pleading note into his voice, "I'm sorry if you felt I was lying by not just saying all that, but I really just didn't think it mattered to know. I hated it there, I love it here, that's what mattered to me, I didn't see the point in making you all angry by mentioning something that was long done."

Any of them could have argued the point with him, it would have been easy to spend hours having an uneasy chat about every little thing those Dursleys had ever done to Harry and then reciprocating with a loving promise it was all going to be okay now, but Harry was a grown man now. They all still couldn't help envisioning this happening to their infant upstairs, but it truly was now his decision how he wanted to handle this. He didn't technically owe them anything.

Harry had kept his promise, and while he took one last hopeful look at his dad and waited for those hazel eyes to brighten when they met, he went back to the book. His dad may even still be mad at him, but at least they were okay now.

HPHPHPHPHP

  *Alright, real talk here folks. I did a lot of thinking over this topic, as it's such a widely debated thing amongst HP fans about what Harry really lived through during his time at the Dursleys. Personally, I think a lot of it gets exaggerated, but I never undermine that they did Harry some real harm. I kept myself to the facts and truths that I knew about, and I may have built this up a bit, but don't take my/ Harry's explanation as one that isn't terrible. What the Dursleys did to Harry was a lot more mental punishment than physical, making sure he felt as unloved as possible, which can do as much damage to you as a beating. Guess I don't really have anything else to say, mostly it turned into a big thing between him and James more so then what the Dursleys actually did, but I hope the build up to this scene was at least kind of worth it.

[thenovelartist]

Falling for the Dork, set 1

My Adrienette April story that I’m doing all at the end of the month as one continuous story. ;) Here’s the first set of prompts

Next set>>

1.      Just Friends

“It’s not like anyone is going to know who I am.”

That was the argument that finally allowed him to go to public school for his last three years. Adrien didn’t press for the year and a half after mother had passed on, but now, there was no reason for him to put off asking. Sure, his father may be Gabriel Agreste, but as far as anyone knew, Gabriel didn’t have a son, so that wouldn’t cause an uproar or anything.

Or, maybe people knew—it was probably on Wikipedia—but it wasn’t well-known.

Either way, Adrien as determined to draw as little attention to himself as he could. To further his disguise, he put on his favorite punny cat shirt.

“I can’t believe you collect those abominations,” his father grumbled.

“They’re hilarious!” Adrien argued with a grin, looking down at it. “What’s so wrong with it?”

Gabriel sighed. “And couldn’t you comb your hair?”

Adrien ran his hands through it the thick, blond strands. “Why? Is it bad? I thought it looked fine.”

Again, Gabriel sighed, this time rubbing his eyes under his glasses. “Well, no one is going to mistake you for a son of mine.”

“That’s kinda the point, dad,” Adrien said with a smirk.

The very corner of Gabriel’s mouth twitched up. “Also, don’t forget you have fencing tonight.”

“Don’t worry. I won’t miss it. It’s right after school.”

Gabriel gave a nod. “Have a good day.”

“Thanks, father. See you tonight.”

…

“I’m so late!” Marinette screeched as she bolted out of her house, nearly getting hit by a car and running over a couple other people on her way to school.

Thankfully, she wasn’t late. However, it wasn’t all sunshine and roses. Because before she could take a seat in her normal seat that has been her seat for the past several school years, she had to get past the guy putting gum on her seat.

“Hey!”

The boy whipped around, his eyes wide behind his thick, black lenses.

“Just what do you think you’re doing?” Marinette challenged.

“I… uh…”

She scoffed. “Whatever. Just leave.”

He gaped like a fish the next few seconds, Chloe and Sabrina’s laughter ringing in the back ground. “Looks like someone’s caught, Adrikins.”

Marinette rolled her eyes. Of course, this boy was friends with Chloe. Shocking, considering that he clearly had zero style with that stupid, baggy cat pun t-shirt.  “Just leave,” she snipped, taking a tissue from her bag and putting it over the gum.

“You heard the fashion disaster, Adrien. Move it.”

The boy was stunned for a moment, but did as asked, all while Chloe laughed and mocked “Adrikins” and Marinette.

Great. New year and nothing had changed.

…

Adrien felt horrible. Just how was he supposed to fix this mess when the girl he’d royally screwed up with wouldn’t let him get anywhere near her. He supposed that was partly his fault for not explaining anything, but she had a fierce look in her eye that kinda scared him a little. She may be small, but he honestly believed she could hand him his rear on a silver platter.

He was about to head out when he noticed that the rain had trapped said fierce girl he was intimidated by under the overhanging in front of the school.

“Hey.”

Marinette immediately turned away.

He cringed. “Um… I really just want to say that I’m sorry. I really was trying to get the gum off your seat. I swear.”

It was barely noticeable, but Marinette turned her head toward him.

“I haven’t been to school before, and I’ve never seen Chloe that mean. I’m really sorry.”

This time, Marinette turned all the way back toward him. “You’re apologizing for her?” she asked, brow knit together in confusion and anger.

“No, uh… I mean I’m just sorry she’s that mean. Particularly to you, it seems.” With that, he opened his umbrella and held it out to her. “Here. A peace offering. My car is here to pick me up, and I can get another.”

The anger on her face gradually faded, leaving a much softer expression. Hesitantly, she reached for the offered umbrella. “Are you sure?”

He flashed her a smile. “Yeah. You were grumbling about having to walk home in the rain in class.”

She took the umbrella. “Thanks. I’ll return it tomorrow.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he said with a shrug. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

She gave him a smile. It was small, but he felt like he’d been graced with a gift. “Marinette,” she said, sticking one hand out, clearly inviting him to shake it.

He grinned, taking her hand to shake. “Adrien.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Adrien. Thank you again for the umbrella. I really appreciate it.”

And just like that, she was gone.

Adrien’s smile was wide as he ran off into the rain and slid into the back seat of the car. It was too early to tell, and maybe it was too early to call it anything more than acquaintances, but he hoped that one day, maybe, they could be friends.

 2.      Seat Buddies

It was the second day of school, and the rain hadn’t let up. It was both a blessing and a curse because that meant she remembered to pack the umbrella Adrien had loaned her as well as one of her own.

However, that didn’t help her get to school on time. In any sort of dry condition.  

Still, she arrived right before the bell rang and took a seat in the only empty spot. Conveniently, right next to Adrien.

When the teacher wasn’t looking, Marinette pulled the umbrella out of her bag and passed it under the desk to Adrien. “Thank you,” she whispered.

He stared at it a moment, stunned, before taking the umbrella and slipping it in his bag. “You’re welcome.”

Marinette frowned. “Were you not expecting it back?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know what to expect. And Chloe doesn’t give anything back.”

Her brow furrowed. “Why do you always talk about Chloe? Don’t you have any other friends.”

“No.”

The answer itself was surprising, but the bluntness made her jump.

“I was homeschooled until I came here,” he continued. “I know Chloe because of a family friend, but I don’t really have anyone else.”

Marinette glanced toward the front, uncertain of what to say as well as checking to make sure the teacher hadn’t caught onto their conversation. “Well,” she whispered back. “That’s just ridiculous. You have me. We’re seat buddies now.”

His expression was one of surprise, but he quickly schooled it and glanced back at the front. “Really?”

“Totally.”

His smile was worth its weight in gold. “I’d like that, Seat Buddy.”

 3.      Embarrassing

They became fast friends. By the end of the month, Marinette could say that he could see Adrien becoming her best friend, second to Alya, of course. Despite only knowing each other a short time, the duo started hanging out at Marinette’s house after school once they learned they loved the same video games.

When Adrien was free, that is. Between fencing and mandarin lessons and piano, he was seemingly swamped all the time.

“Who are your parents that they make you do all these lessons?”

Adrien pouted as Marinette won the first round of UMS III. “How do you always beat me!”

“I’m magic,” she commented. “Now, answer the question.”

Adrien just shrugged. “What does it matter?”

“I just want to know what kind of parents, who are clearly wealthy considering your car and the fact you take a ton of lessons, let you walk out of the house dressed like that.”

“Like what?” Adrien asked, clearly confused.

Marinette motioned to his baggy, neon green hoodie and his messy hair. “You know.”

“No, I don’t.”

“In stupid cat pun t-shirts—"

He gasped, slapping a hand over his chest in mock offence. “Cat puns are the best.”

She leveled him a look all while trying not to laugh. “You’re a loon. How are we friends.”

“We’re seat buddies.” Adrien always said that with pride, like some giddy child showing off his prized possession.

“You’re such a dork.”

“You’re stuck with me; get over it. Now let me beat you.”

“Not a chance.”

After two more rounds, Marinette offered to grab some snacks for the two of them. Adrien willingly followed her down into the bakery where they snagged some cupcakes that didn’t make the cut.

“Yum!” Adrien said, plenty happy as he carried a couple cupcakes up the stairs back to the apartment.

“You haven’t even eaten them yet,” Marinette giggled.

“I don’t have to to know they’re amazing.”

She rolled her eyes, then grabbed two plates from the cupboard to catch the crumbs before the duo sat down at the kitchen table.

After a single bite, Adrien moaned his appreciation. “See. They’re perfect.”

She shook her head. “Please. Even if they weren’t, you’d make a show just to prove a point.”

They may have only known each other a month, but Marinette knew that when Adrien got that kind of smug look, it only meant trouble. Instead of saying a word, he bit into the cupcake again, moaning loudly and doing some sort of stupid happy dance.

As he went in for the second bite, though, Marinette had had enough and flicked the cupcake upwards, smashing it into his nose and getting frosting all over his glasses.

“Hey!” he cried indignantly.

“It’s your fault.”

“My fault?”

Marinette giggled. “You’re such a dork.”

He pouted, and she smugly took a bite of her cupcake.

Her mistake.

Adrien was quick to return the favor. Now, he was the one laughing while she had chocolate frosting clinging to her nose.

“Okay,” Marinette said, grabbing her other cupcake, a wicked grin bubbling up. “If that’s how you want to play, it’s on.”

In a second, the two teens smashed the cupcakes into each other’s faces.

Too bad the frosting on Marinette’s cupcake fell off onto Adrien’s shirt before the cupcake hit his face.

After a moment of laughter and comments of them being way too juvenile, they grabbed paper towels to start cleaning up.

“We should wash that frosting off before it stains,” Marinette commented, pointing at the large chocolate smear down the front of his hoodie. “I can see if I have anything that fits so that I could throw it in the wash for you.”

“That’s fine,” Adrien said, taking off his glasses. “I have a shirt on underneath.”

Before Marinette could say a word, Adrien had pulled his hoodie up over his head, revealing a tight, black tee he had on underneath. He bundled up the hoodie so as not to get chocolate everywhere, then turned to her, running a hand through his hair absently.

And that was the moment Marinette knew she was in serious trouble.

“Marinette?”

She shook herself from her trance at the mention of her name. “Yeah? What?”

“What should I do with this?” He motioned to the hoodie in his hands.

“I’ll take it,” she said quickly. “I’ll throw it in the wash and get the chocolate right out. Yup. I’ll be back in a moment.”

She could feel the pink on her cheeks as she took the jacket and ran. She hoped beyond hoped she wasn’t staring too long; she’d be beyond embarrassed if that was the case.

After all, what’s a girl supposed to do when she realizes that underneath the cat puns, baggy hoodies, nerdy glasses, and messy hair that her total dork of a friend is actually a surprisingly toned perfect 10?

[girls-scenarios]

One Afternoon

Idol: Taeyeon (SNSD)

Prompt: since requests are closing soon i'm going to request this: TaeyeonxFem!Reader | Tattoo Parlor AU & Soulmate AU (Changing tattoo that tells you the coordinates of where your soulmate is) | fluff | Girls' Generation (Jessica included) runs a tattoo parlor and everyone has found their soulmate but Taeyeon hasn't and was starting to lose hope. One day the reader decides to get a tattoo there, but doesn't notice that her coordinates change, until Taeyeon, while doing her tattoo points it out.

Writer: Admin Kiwi

A/N: So this request has seriously been in our inbox for ages now. I’m sorry that it took us so long to write it, but I hope you all enjoy!

♡ Tip Jar♡

Taeyeon loved her job. She loved making designs and carefully tattooing them into her client’s skin, loved creating permanent art, and loved being a part of her client’s most intimate memories and thoughts. She’d always been artistic, and tattooing had come almost naturally to her. As soon as she’d tried it for the first time, she’d been hooked: she knew that she wanted to do this for the rest of her life.

It helped that she loved getting tattoos herself too. There were plenty of reasons that she liked covering her skin in intricate ink designs. But the biggest reason had to do with one certain tattoo on her skin. One that she hadn’t put there on purpose.

Her soulmate tattoo. Everyone was born with one. It was supposed to tell you the coordinates of your soulmate, and when you matched coordinates with someone no matter where the two of you went, you could know that you’d found your soulmate. The problem was that Taeyeon’s tattoo had never once changed. In fact, ever since she was born, she’d had the coordinates of the shop she now worked at on her wrist. The numbers never changed.

Apparently, her soulmate was the Generations Tattoo Shop.

“Taeyeon,” her fellow tattooist Tiffany said, knocking the other woman out of her thoughts as she came up to the desk, blowing a bubble in her gum. Her long black hair was shaved on one side of her head and pulled back into a ponytail, showing off her impressive neck tattoo and her collection of earrings. Today, she was wearing one of her favorites: the dragon that climbed up her ear. As usual, she was effortlessly beautiful in her minimal makeup. “Don’t forget about your appointment today at one. They’re a new client.”

“What time is it now?”

“Twelve-thirty. You should probably start readying your station.”

Taeyeon sighed and stood up, stretching her hands over her head and yawning. “You’re right. Sorry, I was spacing out. It’s been a long day.” She’d had back-to-back clients in all morning, and had barely gotten time to take a little lunch break. Her curly blonde hair was probably a mess in the bun she’d thrown it into that morning, but she didn’t have much time to fix it. She just tucked the strands that had fallen out behind her ear and fixed her glasses, taking off the jacket she’d put on to go get her lunch. Underneath, she was wearing a simple black t-shirt that accentuated the mostly black-and-white tattoos on her arms. It was nothing fancy, but she didn’t have the time to make herself look good. Now it would be back to business as usual.

“As usual, you’re our most popular artist.” Grinning, Tiffany patted her shoulder. “Let me know if you need anything.”

“Will do.” She raised her eyebrows. “Why do you look so excited?”

“Jessica is taking me out tonight. She said to dress nice, so I bet it’s somewhere fancy.” The other woman let out a love-sick sigh and sat in the now-abandoned desk seat. “I’m looking forward to it.”

“I can tell.” It wasn’t that Taeyeon wasn’t happy for all her friends. Seriously, she was happy for them. But it was hard working with a bunch of women who’d already found their soulmates. “Have fun with that.”

“You know.” Tiffany snapped out of her love-struck daze to wiggle her eyebrows. “Maybe this new client could be the soulmate you’ve been looking for.”

“Tiffany....” Taeyeon sent her coworker a point look, raising one eyebrow.

“You can’t lose hope!”

“Sure, whatever you say. I’m gonna go prep my tools.” She walked away, ignoring Tiffany’s huff behind her. The other woman meant well, she really did. But Taeyeon wasn’t in the mood. It had been how many years now, and her tattoo had never once changed. She’d long accepted that her soulmate was work, and she was okay with that. Although it was a little sad to think about, especially when her eight coworkers were happy with their soulmates, it was better than stressing over a soulmate that would likely never come.

This was just her life now. And she’d accepted it.

-

You were right on time. At exactly one, you walked through the doors, a little smile on your lips as you greeted Tiffany and Taeyeon, who were sat behind the desk. Taeyeon took the time to notice that you already had a few tattoos, which was a relief. It would make the whole process easier.

“I’m here for my appointment with Taeyeon, my name is (Y/N),” you said, tucking your hair behind your ear, and Taeyeon stood, giving you a smile and reaching out her hand.

“Welcome to Generations Tattoo Shop (Y/N), I’m Taeyeon.”

“Thank you!” You shook her hand. “I’m excited for our session today, I’ve heard only good things about you.”

“I’m flattered,” she said honestly, putting her hand to her chest as her smile grew wider. “Thank you! Now, if we just want to go through a few forms, we can get started with this process!”

She’d already been emailing back and forth with you over ideas, as was custom at the shop, since she had too many clients for walk-ins. This meant that your design was already approved, stenciled, and ready to go when you sat down at the chair. Still, she let you take a look before she put it on, wanting to make sure that it was what you had in mind.

“I love it,” you said, and she could tell you meant it as you gazed at the design, a smile on your lips. “It’s wonderful.”

“Then am I okay to put it on your forearm?”

“Yes, please! Let’s get started!”

Some tattoo artists were talkative as they worked. For Taeyeon, it depended on the day and the design. For simple designs with a nice client, she could talk the whole time. With more intricate designs, it was better for her to focus and take her time. And for rude clients, she didn’t even grace them with conversation, just ready to get them over with. Her mood also depended on her amount of sleep the night before and what kind of clients she’d had that day. Thankfully, the day had gone smoothly and you were nice, so with this tattoo, despite it’s more intricate nature, she didn’t mind talking.

It was weird. She almost felt drawn to you, but she couldn’t explain why. It was easy to chat with you. Conversation just flowed naturally as the two of you talked about the changing fall weather, tattoos, and music, finding that the two of you had a lot in common. Taeyeon was pretty sure that she’d never been this chatty with any other clients, and from the way Tiffany and Yuri were making eyes at her over the counter, she figured they’d noticed it too. If her eyes weren’t mistaken, she was pretty sure Yuri was texting the rest of the girls.

Sure enough, minutes later, Tiffany and Yuri were joined behind the counter by Yoona, Yuri’s soulmate, and Sooyoung, the only other tattooists on duty. Taeyeon had no doubt that the group chat was blowing up. Still, she tried to ignore it, focusing on creating the perfect tattoo for you.

Once she was coming close to finishing the tattoo, the bottom of the design nearing the wrist, she noticed your soulmate tattoo. There hadn’t been a reason for her to look at it before (she’d long since grown out of the excitement of trying to find a soulmate) but now that she was tattooing near it, the coordinates caught her eye. And then her eyes widened. That was strange. She’d recognize those numbers anywhere.

“Hey, your coordinates are for this tattoo shop. That’s strange.”

Your eyes matched hers as you sat up, mouth dropping open. “Wait, really? There’s no way!”

“What?” She looked up, confused, sitting back to let you look at your wrist for yourself.

“It’s never changed before....” You trailed off, staring in awe. “It was always just at zero. I thought I was broken or something.”

Hope jumped up in Taeyeon’s chest, but she shoved it down, not wanting to be crushed again. “So this is the first time it’s changed?”

“Yeah. That’s so weird.” You looked at her. “How did you notice?”

“The coordinates caught my eye. It’s for the shop, obviously, but it’s also what my coordinates have been stuck at since I was a kid.” She held up her own wrist beside yours. The coordinates matched.

“Could this mean...?” The two of you stared at each other, and Taeyeon could feel her heart beating quicker than usual in her chest. Was Tiffany actually right?

“I don’t know. Mine has never changed, I don’t want to get your hopes up.”

“But with you is the first time mine have ever changed. Is anyone else here single?”

“Well, no.”

“Then that leaves you.” You gave her a shy smile. “There is a way we could find out for sure.”

“What’s that?” She didn’t want to admit it, but she was excited. Hope that she couldn’t push down surged into her chest.

“After you finish my tattoo, do you want to go get coffee at the shop down the street?”

She checked the clock. She had a gap between you and the next customer. It was only an hour, but still. A lot could happen in an hour. Nervous all of a sudden, she cleared her throat and started up her tattooing machine again. “Let’s hurry and finish this tattoo again.”

Taeyeon never rushed her work, so she was lucky that she was almost done already. After finishing the last few touches and wiping off the excess ink, she let you see the final product before wrapping it up and giving you the care instructions. But neither of you were really focused on the specifics, rushing through the final paperwork before she let her coworkers know she was going to take a quick break.

There was snickering and excited calls to have fun as she left, but she decided she’d take care of the gossip later.

As the two of you walked, you both looked at your tattoos, waiting with bated breath. Slowly, the numbers began to change, and Taeyeon beamed, feeling tears of relief come to her eyes as she stared down at the changing numbers.

“Is this real?” You whispered, and Taeyeon nodded her head, looking up at the sky to hide her tears. The afternoon was bright, not a cloud in the sky, a weight of expectation lifted from her shoulders. After all these years, at last she’d found you.

“It’s real. I’m so glad I finally got to meet you.”