#yandere illumi x reader
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cheesecakethots · 1 year ago
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“Whore.”
You could’ve sworn the teacup in your hands cracked a little from how hard you’re gripping it. If you were Illumi, it would’ve shattered into a fine powder by now. But you’re not, which makes you susceptible to being called such things.
They’re at it again. You’re unsure as to what you’ve done to upset some of the butlers and maids, but god do they not like you. No matter. You hate everyone in this stupid boring ugly manor anyway. Huh. Maybe that’s why they hate you, too.
It must’ve been a shock to see Illumi of all people one day bring home his future wife. One he never cared to mention to anyone else beforehand, and one that was still kicking and screaming over his shoulder.
You’re not really sure how long you’ve been here. Months? A year now? However long it’s been, it didn’t take anytime at all to realise that maybe you’re not as safe here as Illumi swears you to be. His mother most definitely hates you, but, oh well, she’s never really tried anything, as far as you know.
The help started muttering things when Illumi wasn’t around, things that hurt more than you wanted to admit. When you didn’t go running off to Illumi at the first few instances of it, it got worse, as though they knew you would never tell him about it.
First off, you don’t want to give him the satisfaction of being your saviour when someone says mean things to you. Secondly, you may hate these assholes, but you have a conscience.
Only last week Illumi came into your shared bedroom, absolutely drenched in blood, asking if you could shower together. You quickly found out that whoever he had been torturing wasn’t dead yet, and he still had more to do.
Thinking about what Illumi does to people he doesn’t care about, those he’s only hurting for a job, makes you shiver at the thought of him actually harming someone who did him, or you, wrong. But, despite your mercy on them, this time you’re considering just telling him. Only a little.
You’ve had a notably stressful day, being pranced around by his mother who’s insistent on ‘training’ you to be the perfect wife for her son. Her explaining to you that the family expects at least six children from you both had you rushing to the bathroom to vomit.
Then you ran into his father, on your way back to your room. He doesn’t seem to actively dislike you, but he scares the absolute shit out of you. The man seems to think you’re some house pet rather than an actual person with thoughts and feelings, but you suppose that’s a modicum better than wanting you dead.
You also bumped into Illumi’s grandfather. You’re not sure if you can bring yourself to hate him, but you do hate the look of pity in his eyes whenever he sees you. Sometimes he’ll save you from a lecture Illumi’s mother is giving you, so he’s nice in that regard. He’d never free you, though, so he’s just another kidnapper you can’t become friendly with.
You eventually got back to your room, expecting a nice nap before being forced to attend family dinner, only to find Illumi had gotten back earlier than expected. You cringed at how hungry he was, and not for food, but just allowed him to do as he wished. You were too tired to argue. After he was done, he seemed to take note of how quiet and exhausted you were. Too bad, dinner time. You hated dinner times more than anything else.
You ate the admittedly lovely food in pure silence, but quickly became sick to your stomach at hearing Illumi and his mother discuss the prospects of you becoming pregnant. You didn’t eat anymore after that. You’re pretty sure his brother, Milluki, made some comment about you that Illumi didn’t like, which explains why his wrist was snapped in half a few seconds later.
Illumi tried spoon feeding you when noticing how full your plate was, but you managed to convince him that you weren’t hungry. That got you another lecture from his mother about how you’ll soon be eating for two. You were tempted to tell her that if you ever got pregnant you’d throw yourself into Mike’s jaws, but managed to refrain.
After that, you finally got to go to bed. It wasn’t something you were looking forward to anymore; you struggled to sleep when Illumi was home because he’d spend the majority of the night just staring at you.
“Can I go outside?”
You don’t remember why you blurted it or where the thought came from, but you remember the confused blink Illumi gave in response.
“Um.. just for.. ten minutes? O-Or five..? I just want to sit in the garden by myself for a bit… If not, it’s alright..”
You hated how pathetic you sounded, unsure as to what Illumi was thinking when he stared at you with that expressionless face.
“Alright.”
“What?”
“Would you like me to ask a maid to bring you out a cup of tea?”
You didn’t really think about his words too much, just happy you got something your way for once, and nodded rather enthusiastically. You should’ve said no.
The first few minutes of being in the garden, sat on the bench and allowing the cool nights breeze to settle on your skin had you relaxing for the first time in a while.
“Your tea, mistress.”
Oh. It was one of the ones you were sure hated you, and behind him was another. Oh, well. You took the tea from his hands, thanking them nonetheless.
It was much more bitter than you liked it, but you didn’t complain. You didn’t really want tea in the first place. They didn’t leave, but you didn’t complain. Illumi probably asked them to watch over you, maybe to make sure you didn’t try to run. It’s alright, you still have a nice view to relax with.
“Whore.”
Your eyes widen a little, and your grip on the cup increases. They continue muttering amongst themselves, but you catch small, demeaning phrases that you’re certain are aimed at you.
Why are you a whore? You’d never even had sex before you met Illumi, and if you had, it wouldn’t be their business. You’re hardly allowed to interact with anyone other than who Illumi allows you to. Where would you have the chance to sleep around? The insult doesn’t make much sense.
That’s what you tell yourself, despite the fact that your shoulders and hands are shaking and you feel something cold and wet running down your cheeks.
Shit.
You put the cup on the floor, hands moving to cover your face and wipe away any evidence of tears. Illumi hated when you cried.
Why are you still crying? What they said doesn’t make any sense. Stop crying, enjoy the view. You don’t have long left before you have to go back inside.
You’re still crying. You don’t notice that it’s gone eerily silent aside from your own muffled sobs, too busy working on shutting yourself up.
“[Name].”
Shit. Shit!
He’s been sat next to you for god knows how long now, and you didn’t even realise. God, this sucks.
“Why are you crying?” Illumi asks, and you can feel him move closer to you on the bench.
“I-I’m not,” you say, a hand still covering your eyes. What excuse do you give? If you say hay fever will he never let you out in the garden again? If you say you have a cold, will he keep you inside your bedroom for a few weeks? Months?
He doesn’t say anything, but you can feel him staring at you.
“Would you like to stay outside for a bit longer?”
Oh.
“Ye-Yeah. Y-Yes please,” you eventually reply, gulping down another sob.
He doesn’t leave, but you’re less bothered by his presence than usual. Despite it being… him, it’s not horrible to have some company, even though you’d never admit it out loud.
You’re not sure how long you sit outside before he stands, prompting you to do the same. Neither of you say anything, not until you reach your bedroom and Illumi tells you in a tone softer than you’d usually hear from him that he has something he must do, so you’ll be sleeping alone tonight.
You turn to go to bed, but he grabs your wrist. He doesn’t look at you for a moment, seemingly considering something. Then, he stiffly leans forward, pressing his lips to your forehead rather robotically. Sometimes you wonder if he is a robot, it really would explain a lot.
The kiss ends soon after it begins.
“Get some rest. You look bad.”
You huff a little, but can’t bring yourself to actually be offended due to the thinly veiled concern in his tone.
The sleep you get is better than you expected. Maybe not having a mass murderer eyeing you up while you try and rest is a reason for that.
Illumi doesn’t show up for the entirety of the next day, which is a little strange. He likes seeing you off in the morning, giving you a kiss before he departs - you’re certain he copied it from a romance movie you used to enjoy watching from time to time. You don’t question his absence too much, you don’t exactly enjoy his company, after all.
The day you have is better than the last. Illumi’s mother seems to be a bit less of a bitch than usual. That’s a win in your book.
It doesn’t take long for you to be back in your warm bed, wrapped up in covers and drifting off to sleep.
You wake up to the feeling of something wet hitting the tip of your nose, and quiet breathing above you.
“Are you awake?”
You are now. It’s pitch black in the room, but you can make out Illumi looming over, his hair framing around you like some makeshift cage.
Still sleepy, you groan a little, “Illumi? What… time is it?”
Something wet hits the bed.
“2:57 AM.”
Huh. You breathe in through your nose. Illumi absolutely reeks. Metallic, is it? You’re not sure it’s the best idea to comment on it.
“Oh. Okay.”
Another drip of something onto the blanket. He doesn’t seem to be in the talking mood.
“Have I done something wrong?”
“… Yes.”
Another.
You gulp. “Are you mad at me?”
“I don’t think so.”
Another drip, this time it hits your arm.
“Are you going to hurt me?”
You could’ve sworn you saw his eyes narrow in the darkness.
“No.”
The silence is deafening. Your hands clutch onto the end of the blanket. He leans impossibly closer, and the stench of whatever is on him becomes all too familiar. He’s smelt like it before, but never this strong.
“How long were the help bothering you?”
“Since I got here.” There’s little point in trying to lie about it now.
“If you hide something from me again I’ll break three of your fingers.”
A little specific, but the threat certainly does the job.
“Okay. I’m… sorry.” You’re not.
Finally, he pulls away, eyes still trained on your face.
“Go to sleep.”
You don’t. You’re certain that you can’t, at least not for tonight. Especially not after hearing him turn the shower on, and after he’s done leave the room once more.
Instead, you sit and stare at the ceiling, and wonder if any of those in the basement will even have three fingers left of them, by the time he’s done.
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citrus-writing · 2 months ago
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How do you think the Phantom Troupe members will react to the reader almost passing out while having sex with them?
// Yandere phantom troupe members react to darling nearly passing out during sex with them // 
I kept the reason darling nearly passed out vague, since the yanderes wouldn't know the reason, and because one isn't specified. ( However, my assumptions when writing these were something related to fear or nervousness, weakness or pain, or a pre-existing medical condition or some sort- so these can be read with those scenarios in mind, but doesn’t have to be. ) 
Warnings: nsfw, dub-con / non-con, sorta somnophilia, some of these are fluffy and sweet but some are a little bit dark 
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Yanderes that are worried about you, immediately stopping what they had been doing to comfort you and make sure you’re ok. 
Chrollo, uvogin, illumi
Chrollo- 
Chrollo is so romantic and caring towards you, he always takes great care and precision in caring for you- from undressing you to preparing you for him, he’s diligent and incredibly in tune with your needs and desires. 
He kisses down your body with fervor, mouth hot and tongue insistent at all your weak spots, hands following close behind, trailing down your body as well. You’re perfect- soft and beautiful and all his his his. He’s always enamored with the sounds you make, nearly overwhelmed with the pleasure he always gives you, he always loves the face you make, face all flushed and eyes hazy with pleasure. 
That’s why it catches him so off guard when he notices the way you seem less steady; even while laying down, it’s obvious you’re growing dizzy, disoriented, face becoming slightly paler. Your hands grip at the sheets, knuckles nearly white from the force. 
“My love, are you alright?” he asks, stopping whatever he’d been doing to give his full attention to your face and your words. He can't hide the worry in his voice, nor the worried expression he wears. How could he even think to hide such things when you’re so unsteady in his arms. 
“Do you need me to stop?” he soothes- he won't mind if you do need to stop, or slow down- after all, you’re the light of his life, everything he does is for you. Besides, he’d never turn down the opportunity to dote on you and take care of you. 
Uvogin- 
Uvogin is aware he can be overwhelming- from the overzealous roughness of his touch to the sheer size of him, he knows that sex with you can be overwhelming for you, and, if he’s not careful, even painful. That’s why he’s always so careful with you, doing his best to go slow and take good care of you- you, his darling. Because he adores you, and he needs you to enjoy the things he does to you. He needs to see your mouth fall open in a moan so loud it’s nearly a scream, he needs to hear the way your scream out his name. 
When you start to become overwhelmed, body growing shaky and fingers and thighs trembling, he eases up immediately, slowly coming to a stop. Had he gotten too caught up in the moment? Had he gotten a little rough with you? He’s gotten used to watching for signs of discomfort in you, always a little too aware of the way you struggle to take him, so he notices immediately when you start to feel out of it. 
“Hey, you alright?” he asks you. “Was that too much?” he knows he caught your discomfort before it could get bad, with you already looking like you're doing a little better. You’ve stopped trembling so much, face growing a little less flushed, eyes returning from the edge of teariness. He runs a comforting hand through your hair, down your back, pulling you close to him. “I’ve got you, you’re alright.” 
Illumi- 
Of course illumi notices when you start to act distant, nothing ever gets past those wide eyes, especially not when they’re so focused on you- on your face and your body and those sounds you make that make him so hot he can hardly stand it. The first thing he notices is your sounds, growing less so pleasured and more so desperate in a way that almost sounds like pain, and is definitely discomfort. 
“Darling?” he asks, not yet letting up on the motion of his movements, “is it too much?” it’s hard for him to tell how you’re feeling at any given moment- after all, he’s mastered being able to push through any discomfort, but you haven't, you’re so sweet and gentle compared to him, and he needs to remind himself of that often to avoid pushing you too far. 
You nod weakly, a little embarrassed, and a little nervous to disappoint him. He stops his movements instantly, as if you had stopped him yourself. His eyes watch you as you take a moment you steady yourself, obviously trying to gather the strength and composure to explain yourself. And he’d let you explain, but not right now. 
“Don't speak, let me get you something to drink, and help you get cleaned up.” he knows by now you wont fight him on this, when he made up his mind about something it was made. He hates the thought of you in pain, especially from him. Whatever he did to overwhelm you, he’ll make it right. 
-----
Yanderes that don’t stop, either too caught up in the moment or simply uncaring if you do pass out- after all, they’ll take care of you. 
Feitan, phinks, nobunaga, shalnark 
Feitan- 
You feel too good- wrapped around him like a vice, squeezing so tight. It makes him almost dizzy himself, so when he watches your eyes grow hazy and your body starts to tremble, he thinks very little of it. Maybe even thinks it’s good, afterall, he loves knowing he has an effect on you. 
It takes him a minute to realize how unsteady you are, not dizzy with pleasure necessarily but more so dizzy as you grapple with the edge of consciousness. “Too much?” he asks, voice tight, as he continues to push into you. He watches you nod, shaking hands reaching out to him to steady yourself. 
He lets you tangle your arms around his shoulders, lets you seek out the sensations you need to keep you grounded, but he doesn't stop. He slows down, so slow he’s nearly stopped, but feitan continues to roll his hips into you in a desperate attempt to not let this end. Even just this is more that enough- benign buried to the hilt inside you is perfect, how can he complain when you’re so fucked out that you can hardly stay coherent. 
“So good for me.” he whispers as he forces you to take it. The pace is slow but so so deep, and he watches your face with an intensity that doesn't help you calm down at all, but a part of you really wants to be good for him, so you fight not to struggle against him as you struggle equally hard to stay awake. 
Phinks- 
Phinks always struggles to hold back, especially with you- his beloved darling, but he’d been so sure that he’d been doing a good job at not going too rough, not fucking you as hard and fast as he wanted to- and god, he wants to. 
It catches him off guard when you look up at him with such hazy eyes, lip worried between your teeth, clearly overwhelmed and uncomfortable. Fuck, fuck. “Hey, you’re alright.” he soothes, shifting his weight to free a hand to push your hair away from your face. Looking closer, he can see the telltale signs of being near losing consciousness- the sweat, the paleness, the trembling. He hates that it isn't an immediate turn off- he hates that even with you so uncomfortable he desperately needs to fuck you through the orgasm that he’s sure is going to tear through him. Just a little more. 
“Stay with me, stay with me.” he encourages, looming over you and arranging you into a better position, one where you can relax completely against the sheets. It makes him feel guilty, knowing even now he wont stop, but the way the new position seems to help you eases that guilt a little bit, enough for him to breathe a sigh of relief and continue to rut into you. “fuck, just a little more.” he soothes, watching as you nod nearly incomprehensibly. 
Your perfect, he’s sure he’s close- was even before you started to get hazy from it all, but the way you lay back and take it- so willing, even now- has him fucking into you with a reckless adandon. 
Nobunaga- 
It takes nobunaga a minute to realize how out of it you are- after all, aren't you meant to be hazy, shaky, absolutely desperate? Aren't you meant to be unable to form words, too far gone in the pleasure he gives you? His delusional mind thinks so, and he does love the sight of your flushed cheeks and your desperate gaze. 
“Can't take any more?” he asks you, watching the way your face changes as you struggle to comprehend his words. You shake your head, desperate to convey how lightheaded and uncertain you feel. “What’s that? Use your words.” he encourages, but quickly fucks himself into you harder, deeper, faster, and any words on your lips fail, all you can manage is a choked gasp as you feel any thought youd managed to scrape up disappear back into the void of your mind. 
You look so good he can't help but kiss you- his lips pressed seamlessly to yours, tongue invading your mouth. It can help your overwhelmed state, he’s sure, but it does serve to pull more of those cute little noises from you, swallowed up in the kiss. 
“Got nothing to say? That’s alright, I know what you need.” nobunaga knows your body well by now, he knows how to bring you closer and closer to the edge, he knows how to make you squirm and whimper, and he’s certain that he’ll be able to push you over the edge of consciousness as well. The very thought of being allowed to fuck your unconscious body has him fucking into you with renewed fervor. 
Shalnark- 
Shalnark notices fast the way your breath grows ragged, the way your eyes grow teary. It makes him smile, he’s too much for you, already got you on the edge of consciousness and he’s just getting started.“You’re so cute.” he’s not going to stop, not when you look like THIS, fucked out and desperate and teary eyed. He leans down to press a kiss to your lips, charmed by the way you clumsily reciprocate, likely on instinct, because it’s obvious your mind is somewhere else- or, more likely, your mind isn't anywhere right now. 
Shalnark never has trouble taking more from you than you can handle, and this is no different, in fact, this is even more so the case because you can't seem to beg him to stop. “take it, take it.” he accentuates each word with a particularly deep thrust into you, forcing a desperate cry from your lips each time. You seem a little too far gone to really decide if you need to stop or not, so he’ll decide for you, he doesn't mind. “don't worry baby, you’re alright.” 
Even if it’s too much for a cute little thing like you to handle, shalnark knows he isnt hurting you, and that gives him all the certainty he needs to continue fucking into you like he so desperately wants. And if you lose consciousness, it will only further establish the power he had over you, allowing him to truly do anything he wants with you. It’s perfect, so please, feel free to let go. “you can let go if you want. I’ve got you.”
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lovelyyandereaddictionpoint · 5 months ago
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Yandere Illumi Zoldyck Headcannon Pt. I
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Illumi is the type to be so unfamiliar with a simple crush he thinks he’s bewitched when he keeps thinking of you
So when he diverts from his trip home after a successful job it's completely logical
He’s just trying to release himself from this hex
He might even recruit Hisoka 
he’s so sure of it
Whether you’re hanging around Killua and Gon or just hanging out in a city where he was working he makes his way to you
With tons of plans up his sleeves, he goes in
Only to freeze on the spot when you look him in his eyes
“Uhm can I help you?”
“....”
Hisoka’s intervention is the only thing that will save him
Physically shaking the man’s gaze is the only way he starts functioning again
Hisoka will have a good laugh 
But his family wouldn’t 
Whether it's a worldwide disaster that brings the heads of the Zoldyck family together and you're a fighter
or just investigating on their own they’ll bear witness to it
The way you arrive on the scene and Illumi.exe just stops workin
Of course, you don’t notice that the assassin is just wigging out because you’re (inadvertently) talking to him
When they do realize you’re not putting him under some spell 
And he’s just weird
They encourage him to just have you take you if necessary
Whether that’s abducting civilian-you or trying to defeat you on a wager to marry him
All that advice goes out the window because he can’t even talk to you
He doesn’t know the embarrassment 
He doesn’t know butterflies in the stomach
Not until you
You suddenly become this onus that baffles him in every which way
Whether you’re strong enough and aware enough to confront him
Or have little to no use of nen and have no idea who he is
He won’t be able to do anything until he’s able to handle you
But why would he ever 
He loves you 
Even if you’re making him seem like some incompetent lobotomite
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rotten-pomegranates-fics · 7 months ago
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Adult trio s/o that says they don’t have to use a condom. That she wants to feel him release in her, and it oozing out of her. She has a breeding kink, but she doesn’t want to get pregnant.
Yessss mwhahahaha feed my pretties
Warnings: breeding, smut, some hair pulling, name calling, plan b pill, afab reader, mentions public sex
Illumi
Illumi is thrilled, hell yeah he’ll cum inside you, he want to see you pregnant even if it’s not what you want
He’ll most likely just pull out and cum on your Pusey if he knows you don’t wanna be pregnant but he won’t be happy about it
If his orgasm is really good he’ll stay inside and just fall on you holding you from whatever position you guys where in until he has to go shower
There’s no going back after this he wants to breed you every time you fuck now
Hisoka
Hisoka is down with whatever, he’ll breed you if you want and if you bring it up and tell him all that he’s gonna make a big deal out of it
Talking about how your gonna be so full even though the next day your gonna have to take the plan B pull because he doesn’t wanna be tied down with a kid
Your gonna regret asking if he really likes it, before you fucked often but now you can be doing the dishes and your getting bent over
He’s not shy about doing it in public either so be to revelling and all of yorknew will see you get bred
Chrollo
Chrollo is the only one who’s a bit reluctant, he really doesn’t want you to be pregnant, he has to much to deal with all ready
But alas what you want you get, it’s a perk of dating Chrollo
He’s gonna make it an annoyingly long process, getting you on birth control, setting a date that lasts all day, when you finally get home your practically gonna jump on him
He’ll take control so it’s easier for you to just pay attention and really feel your warm squishy walls milking him until he cums
He’s gonna run you a nice bath after to, he truly tries his hardest to make this the best for you
©rotten-pomegranate- All rights reserved, don’t steal, translate, copy, plagiarize, claim my work as your own or post it on other platforms.
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mynahx3 · 2 months ago
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Your Own Prison 7K
Hellooo lovelies!~~~ I bring a Yandere! Illumi x Reader. I hope you enjoy!!! Warning!!!! 18 and up!!!! This DARK story contains DARK subjects of kidnapping/ implied past noncon/ dubcon/ forced relationships/ forced pregnancy Please proceed with caution!! If you don't like, don't read. Not proofread yet.
~~~~~~~~
The day Illumi met you, he was out on a normal mission to gather information for his client.
The rain was merciless and came down hard on your town. It was something he would have to endure. Illumi would normally not care, being used to the harsh weather where he grew up, but today he had a job to do.
It was a simple one that paid surprisingly well.
The wife had discovered her husband having an affair with the secretary, so she launched a hit against the small-town banker. He followed the target until he went into a building, easily keeping track of him in the windows. 
Normally, he would just slip in and finish the job with an easy in-and-out stab of the knife when the target was least expecting it, but the client requested to get the job done in a more discreet manner. One that resembled an accident or natural cause of death. He decided to wait for the perfect opportunity to make it look like the banker's death was simply a tragic accident.
With his years of experience, he was confident he could adapt and complete the job with precision.
For now, Illumi decided he would wait for an opening. He was content with the view he had while also remaining inconspicuous. He just looked like another passenger waiting for the bus in the busy streets.
A few more minutes passed, and a bus arrived at the stop. Illumi almost didn’t notice you standing next to him; the crowd of people walking off the bus didn’t help. It was only when you two were alone did he notice you, looking at you with a calculating gaze. He quickly assessed you, trying to determine if you were a potential threat or just another innocent bystander.
You appeared to be around his age, maybe a little older or younger; it was hard to tell. Dressed in mainly black attire with a worn gray coat. The rain boots you had on were a dark red. Your lips moved; you seemed to be trying to tell him something.
The stoic assassin's face became annoyed as he raised his eyebrow and lifted his hand to his ear, indicating that he couldn't hear you.
The busy city streets drowned out your voice, making conversation difficult. The rain didn't help either, hammering hard against the metal roof above you both. You approached him with a concerned expression on your face. Brows furrowed, and lips parted.
When he got a closer look at you, he realized you weren't horrible looking. It was a thought that vanished as swiftly as it appeared, still irritated by being interrupted.
"That was the last bus for awhile." You said, wincing a little as you pointed to the schedule next to him.
He glanced at the schedule to you, then back to his target, who appeared to be going down the elevator. The stoic expression back on his face.
"I am aware."
The tension between you both was awkward; you shuffled on your feet, looking around sheepishly. He didn't bother looking back at you, thinking the conversation was over.
"If you're cold, my store is over there. You're welcome to wait until the next bus arrives," you offered, trying to diffuse the tension.
Your finger pointed to a corner store not too far from here. The lights flashed in the rain, illuminating the wet pavement as you waited for his response. It looked a bit older than the other establishments in the area. Faded signs were taped on the windows, advertising discounts on various items.
Illumi simply remained silent, unwilling to speak with you any further. His gaze shifted ahead, resuming what he was doing before you interrupted. The rain continued to fall, making the situation more uncomfortable.
You would shortly leave, he assumed.
Proving him wrong, he heard you open one of your bags; the shuffling of wrappers and the sound of you pulling out a small package piqued his ears. Curious, Illumi finally glanced down at what you held; it was a small rectangle, no bigger than the palm of your hand. Looking at him with a tense smile, you held it out towards him, nudging it closer to him when he didn't take it.
"It's a hand warmer!" You informed him with a wider smile. "If you don't want to come in, take this."
Illumi's expression softened slightly as he reached out to accept the hand warmer, a rare gesture of gratitude for him. He titled his head as he picked it up with the tips of his fingers, examining the item with a hint of interest.
"Thank you," he murmured with a questioning tone, holding it in his hand. He wasn't expecting that.
You nod, looking happy that he took it from you, pulling out an umbrella from your bag now.
"I hope it helps keep you warm," you replied before turning to leave him. "If you need more, we sell a few items that could help in this weather, including hand warmers and umbrellas. On sale this week!" you added with a cheeky smile over your shoulder.
With that, you left, stepping into the rain with your umbrella up. Not thinking anything of the interaction with the stranger. His eyes followed you as you walked away; a small feeling stirred inside of him that he had never felt before. The small act of kindness left a lasting impact on him.
It was something you'd live to regret.
~~~~~~~~
Arguing was heard around you as you lay on the floor. You didn't recognize the voices; one was a woman and two other men. You didn't know why this was happening.
You just wanted to go home.
A blindfold was tied tightly over your eyes, now wet from your tears. Wrists tied together behind you as well as your ankles, leaving you no hope for escape. Mouth gagged with your own scarf, not helping the panic rising in your chest. You were roughly dropped onto the floor after being taken from a car, the tile pressing into your cheek as you tried to make sense of the situation. The cries you made were not bothering the people in the room who continued arguing.
"Why on Earth would you pick this girl?" The woman asked angrily; the shrillness of her voice made your ears hurt. "You have so many offers to pick from, why her?"
"It is none of your concern who I pick, Mother. Father said it was fine as long as I didn't forsake my responsibilities." The man's response was cold and dismissive, causing the woman to huff in frustration. Footsteps were heard coming closer to you, making you tense up in fear.
Gentle hands helped you to sit on your knees, making you jolt in surprise. You could feel the weight of their gaze on you, making your skin crawl with unease. You felt goosebumps grow along your arms, and your shaking intensified. It didn't help you had been taken in your sleep, so you only had on an old t shirt and shorts.
Suddenly, there was an overwhelming brightness as someone took off the blindfold. You squinted your eyes in response, adjusting to being able to see for the first time in a few hours.
In front of you was a man with pale skin, dark eyes, and short, black hair. You could only stare at him in shock and confusion. His piercing gaze seemed to burrow into your soul, sending shivers down your spine. The man's expression was inscrutable, heightening your sensation of dread.
"Welcome home, dear wife."
That would be the start of your new life.
~~~~~~~~
“This is something my little brother can withstand; no problem. We need to build your resilience, dear."
Illumi stood over you in the basement. His monotone voice grated your ears as he demeaned you. Empty eyes looking at your weak form crying on the stone floors. His pale hands soaked with your blood as he wiped them clean with a towel.
He acted so casual, as if it were just something as simple as dirt, not human blood. 
Shaking in pain from what he did to you, you lay in a fetal position. For hours on end, he hurt you as you were chained to the ceiling by your wrists. Hard red welts on your wrists were proof of the cuffs digging into your flesh. Your body was covered in bruises and cuts, blood soaked into your clothes. 
Another punishment for trying to escape but it was always futile.
Kukuroo Mountain was vast with unforgiving terrain. Littered with traps to keep anyone out, which also worked perfectly in keeping people in. To your credit, you did manage to evade the highly trained butlers and Illumi for two days. It was the farthest you had ever gotten in your attempts to escape. But now, as you lay broken and defeated, the reality of your situation set in: there was no way out.
These sessions with Illumi only brought you pain and suffering. He was determined to get you to give in. For you to become his sweet wife and meld into his family—like he didn’t kidnap you from your home months prior.
Forcing his way into your life despite only having just met him. Taking anything he wanted from you with no remorse.
With weak arms, you tried to pick yourself off the ground, vision filled with black dots. Stubbornly, you glared up at him. He loved the fire in your eyes; he simply didn't like it when it was aimed at the wrong things. He didn't understand why you were fighting so hard against him. Your determination could have been utilized for more important things, like helping the family, but you had to oppose him.
A blank expression was on his face as he looked at you sit up; a part of him was surprised by that. You had cuts along your arms and legs with a few broken ribs, yet you still had that look of defiance. Seeing you this way only affirmed his feelings.
He knew you were simply meant to be. Yes, your body was weak, but your mind was strong.
Crouching to your level, he looked at you; his cold hand caressed your tangled hair with a gentleness that always shocked you. Illumi was a surprisingly doting man. After your punishments, he made sure to coddle you as you healed.
Kissing your wounds, whispering into your ear, treating you softer than ever before. Over the last few months, you felt your resolve dwindling. You let yourself lean into his touch as it cupped your throbbing cheek, eyes closed as you tried to block out the pain. For just a moment, you felt his touch bring you comfort.
Snapping out of it, you turned away from him, wretching yourself from his hold. You spat in his face, with some of your blood mingled in. He wiped the wetness from his face calmly before saying in a low, frightening tone.
"You will regret that."
His eyes darkened with rage as he looked at the mess on his fingers, and his short, dark hair fell around his face, giving him a more terrifying appearance. Knowing your disobedience would only make matters worse, you prepared yourself for what was about to happen.
"Go to fucking hell."
~~~~~~~~
You awake with a start, jolting up from the plush, silken sheets. Illumi clung to your side like always, his eyes opening immediately at your movement. The nightmare, more like a memory, had made your skin clammy, and sweat dripped down your forehead. As you tried to calm your racing heart, you couldn't shake the feeling of fear that was felt in your bones. Illumi's head tilted at the sight of your distress, prompting him to sit up.
"You're shaking." His voice was soft, a stark contrast to the harshness of your nightmare. "Another dream?"
You nodded, looking at your lap, not replying much to him as he hummed. Moving your gaze to his with a firm grip on your chin, he brushed a strand of hair away from your face, his gaze devoid of emotion. His eyes lingered on yours for a moment before looking away, a flicker of concern crossing his face before he masked it with his usual stoicism.
"The doctor said you needed to rest. You're not doing that, and it's starting to show." He sighed, reaching out to gently tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear.
"I know, I know." You dismissed him, leaning into his touch as he caressed your cheekbone.
His touch was both comforting and unsettling, a reminder of his dual nature. Despite the concern in his eyes, you couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to his motives than he let on.
"I'm here for you." He leaned in, kissing you gently before it went further. You closed your eyes, trying to calm your heart, but his words only seemed to worsen your anxiety.
"Illumi." You tried to protest, hands going to his chest, but you put no strength in them. You stopped fighting him a long time ago, now trying to barter instead. "It's late."
"I know you're worried," he whispered, his voice soft and soothing. "But I only want to help you through this."
The kiss continued for a while longer; he didn't seem to mind your slow movements. He pushed you back onto the bed, squeezing your shoulders. His lips sealed with yours, hard and demanding. Pressing his body against yours and wrapping your legs around him, he caged you in with arms on both sides of your head. The intensity of his look conveyed that he was entirely focused on you at that moment.
"I'm here." He repeated. A hand moves to caress your face again. You felt a rush of emotions in your heart as he added, "I'll always be here for you."
It didn't seem to convey the message he wanted; he was never one to be good with words. His hand moved down to clasp around your throat, not putting any pressure on you. It was a hold that conveyed his possession and control over you.
Tears silently went down your face as you looked up at him, feeling overwhelmed. Your heart was conflicted by the mix of fear and comfort that his touch brought. You wanted to fight back, to run, but you were rooted in place. Knowing what would happen if you fought back.
You have been realizing, too, that there was a tiny, tiny part of you that craved his touch.
Regardless of how much you denied it, you could feel yourself starting to care for him. The defeat in your eyes seemed to make him happy, clear from the small smirk on his lips.
"You're never leaving me, and I know you're starting to accept that," he whispered, his grip tightening, making your breath halt.
Leaning down again, he captures your lips, furthering the passion he felt. He wanted to show the extent of his love for you in more than just words. His hands begin to trail along your body in possession. Feeling and gripping at your soft flesh. It was different from the hardened, trained muscles of his. A good difference to him.
The kisses became more frenzied and hungry, his teeth knashing against your bottom lip. You didn't know whose blood you tasted on your tongue. He always seemed to lose control in moments like this, leaving you breathless and spiraling. His touch was both gentle and possessive, sending shivers down your spine.
As he deepened the kiss, you couldn't help but reciprocate with equal fervor, completely surrendering to the moment. He seemed pleased as you wrapped your arms around his neck, and his movements slowed. His lips lingered on yours, savoring the sensation of heat between you and the feeling of your tongue move against his.
Everything happened so fast; he was always the eager man when it came to you.
Without further warning, you felt him hike your nightgown up, pulling his boxers down shortly after. His hand spread your thighs more apart with ease, the head of his cock rubbing up against your wet entrance a couple times before he pushed in. As he entered you, you had to arch your back against him. You were pressed chest to chest as he pushed deeper and deeper until he was fully inside you, filling you completely.
Even though it was only a sting, the pain that followed was nonetheless unpleasant.
A whimper escaped your lips as he peppered kisses down your neck in an attempt to distract you. Your nails dug into the skin on his back, legs locking around his slim waist, pulling him closer as you tried to focus on the pleasure mingling in.
The release between your legs from earlier did help, but it wasn't enough to completely mask the pain. No matter how many times he took you, it was always on the edge of discomfort, a fine line between pleasure and pain that you both danced along.
"Breathe." He reminded, his voice low and soothing. His touch was gentle, reassuring, and soon the pain was nothing more than a distant memory.
Opening your eyes, you saw him over you, his inky hair falling in disarray around him. If it wasn't for the slight flush on his cheeks and mused hair, you would never think he felt anything other than calm control. His eyes, however, betrayed a hint of desire that mirrored your own growing need for more of his touch.
He stayed in place as you adjusted to him. Passing the time by tracing circles on your hip, the other moving up and down your spine in a soothing motion. Short gasps emerged from your mouth as your face contorted in a mixture of pleasure and discomfort. Your breathing began to steady, the initial pain fading as you relaxed into the moment. Your body became more plaint under him, your insides clenched around him in a delicious ache of anticipation.
Illumi began to slowly rock into you, his hips meeting yours with a steady rhythm. His movements were deliberate and controlled, his touch both soothing and intense. As the initial sting began to fade, a wave of pleasure started to build within you, blending with the lingering pain in a bittersweet symphony.
Your body responded eagerly to his touch, surrendering to the conflicting sensations that he expertly knew how to bring. Seeing this, Illumi began to move faster. Eager to push you to the brink of ecstasy and beyond, his movements are becoming more urgent and intense.
Grunts escaped his lips so quietly that you would have missed them if he hadn't been so close. The room filled with the sound of your combined breaths, and the feeling of his body pressed against yours intensified. Each movement brought you closer to the edge, aching for release as you both lost yourselves in the moment.
"Illumi!" You cried into his ear, hand pulling at his soft hair. Hips moving against his in sync. "Illumi, please don't stop."
This only furthered his own desire, and he responded by increasing the pace and pressure of his movements, pushing you both towards the peak of ecstasy. The tension is building up within the both of you with each movement, the sensations overwhelming your senses as you reached the brink of pleasure.
Moaning loudly, you felt yourself close to unraveling but not quite there.
Continuing his thrusts, Illumi moved his hand between you, flicking at your clit roughly with his thumb. The added stimulation sent you over the edge, your body shuddering as you finally reached that peak of pleasure. Gasping for breath, you clung to him. He followed shortly after with a stuttering of his hips, his release painting your insides as he groaned in satisfaction. In the aftermath, the both of you panted for air. Sweat coated both of your bodies as you lay tangled together, basking in the afterglow.
Making sure to keep his seed plugged inside, he leaned back from you. His hand that gripped at your thigh traveled up to your stomach, where it rested. Dark eyes looked at you, filled with a mix of satisfaction and longing.
"You will never be without me," he whispered, his voice husky. "I will always be a part of you, in every way possible."
~~~~~~~~
"Caladen, Illyrio. Explain yourselves."
You sat in your usual chair at the table, with your daughter on your lap and your two boys in front of you. Each looking guilty, never being one to hide from the judgment of their mother. Your daughter, Sylvia, was unconcerned, knawing on the fabric of your dress despite your efforts to persuade her to stop.
At just five years old, the two boys bore a striking resemblance to their father, and as they grew older, they undoubtedly continued to do so. Dark eyes that stared into the soul and pale skin that seemed to glow in the moonlight. The only semblance of you in them was how they acted. One, stubborn as all hell that rebeled all chances he had, and the other, more obedient, an observer with a silver tongue.
Illyrio spoke first, his voice steady and confident, while Caladen remained silent, a slight frown on his face. The broken pot was behind them, proof of their misdeeds, and was being cleaned up by a butler. It was only on the ground for a couple seconds before it was swept away. Looking like nothing had happened at all.
"We were just practicing, mama."
Seeing the looks on their faces, you almost felt yourself give in to their innocent facade, but you knew better than to be fooled by their charm. It was only a matter of time before they were up to no good again. That mischievous streak was all their own.
"What it looks like you were doing," you start, staying stern with a frown. "Was messing around despite being told to stop playing so roughly in the house, especially our dining room. I expect you both to behave, you know better."
The children exchanged guilty glances, realizing they had been caught red-handed once again.
"Yes, mama."
Their heads hung low as they mumbled their response, knowing that their mischievous behavior had consequences. You couldn't help but feel a mix of frustration and affection for your children. They were only children, but being a child of the Zoldyck family was no easy feat.
In your thoughts, you don't notice the arrival of your husband until he lays a hand on your shoulder. The action made you look up at him, smiling softly at him.
"Go train with your grandmother today." He said, not bothering to look their way as he leaned over you, a blank expression on his face. Voice is still plain as always. "You will need to be punished, so do tell her what you did."
This made your frown deepen; you didn't want them to be punished so harshly. The boys left the dining room without another word. They had always respected and obeyed their father.
As you watched them go, you couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt for what they were about to endure. Kikyo's training was notoriously brutal. They were unforgiving and left lasting scars, you knew from experience. For a moment, they looked like normal kids, laughing together as they ran down the hall. Their assigned butlers were following right behind them.
Your focus was drawn back to Illumi, who had taken your daughter from you. The baby giggled in his arms; chubby fingers immediately began pulling at his long hair. Her blue eyes looked at her father with interest, white hair framing her face in short curls.
She was an innocent, pure child, but you knew that Illumi would raise her to be just as ruthless as he was. The thought made your heart ache, but you had no choice but to watch from afar.
All of your children were Zoldycks; it was their birthright and destiny to be trained as assassins.
"How is little Sylvia this morning?" Illumi asked, sitting next to you at the dining table. She bore a striking resemblance to her grandfather, which her family valued. You knew that Sylvia's future was already set in stone from that alone, and there was nothing you could do to change it.
You couldn't help but feel a pang of sadness as you replied, "She's doing well, as always."
He nodded, a glimmer of pride in his eyes, and returned his attention to his food. Sylvia proceeded to play with the pins on his vest as he fed her.
Illumi began to talk about the typical topics. How he had dealt with his most recent target, upcoming missions, the training regiment that the boys would follow, and the time you were permitted to spend with them.
Every week, you were given an entire day to spend with your children. It was a time you were thankful for. Considering the demands of their training and missions, every hour you could spend with them was valuable.
He had noticed you weren't exactly paying attention to him, only humming in response to his words with no real engagement. Saying your name fixed the problem; your shoulders straightened, and you made eye contact.
"Your mind seems to be elsewhere, dear."
"Just thinking about the boys. Their training is getting more intense." You answered honestly, your hand reaching out to wipe your daughter's mouth of drool with your napkin.
You were often concerned about your boys. They carried a lot of responsibility being the oldest of your children and the first grandchildren.
After you cleaned up your daughter, you gave him that same soft smile you have grown accustomed to giving him. Though it seemed forced at times, he thought he'd never see those loving eyes staring at him. Still, Illumi could tell that wasn't the only thing occupying your mind.
His frigid fingers reached out and moved some hair from your face, catching you by surprise. He wasn't one to be affectionate outside of the bedroom.
The fatigue on your face was more visible in the light.
He had kept you on a strict schedule and diet since your arrival years ago, but he couldn't ignore the signs of weariness sneaking in. You hadn't been sleeping well lately, your appetite had diminished, and you weren't as positive. With the recent birth of your daughter only a few months prior, he knew it was time for a change. Something to cheer you up from the mood you were in.
"I plan to take you and the children to the village soon." He said suddenly, not reacting to the shocked look on your face, busy getting his slobber covered pin from the strong hands of his daughter.
It had been years since you left the mountain; it had been your home—prison—for the last few years. As evidenced by how much his hair had grown, now reaching his lower back from the short style he had when you two first met. Illumi had been adamant to keep your contact to only himself, his family, and the help of the mansion.
"Is it for a mission?" You asked, trying to gauge his intentions, an eyebrow raised in suspicion, sipping on the teacup in hand.
"No, it's not for a mission," he replied smoothly, handing Sylvia over to you once your hands were free. "There is a festival happening that I think the twins will enjoy. I will inform the butlers to pack."
Without saying anything else, he leaned down to kiss your daughter's head and gave you a quick peck on the lips before heading towards the door, leaving you to wonder about his sudden change of heart.
Watching him go, you still had the frown on your face. You couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to his decision than he let on. While you watched him disappear down the hallway, a sinking feeling formed in your gut. You couldn't help but wonder what prompted this surprising act.
It was a thought that left quickly as your lovely daughter spit up all over the front of your dress to your dismay.
~~~~~~~~
The festival was a celebration that was known for its lively atmosphere and colorful decorations.
Ahead of you, the boys looked at the passing floats with an awestruck expression. They had run off without a care in the world, eager to explore all the festivities the festival had to offer.
You were tempted to yell after them, your heart thrumming at the sight of them so far. At first, the crowd didn't help your anxiety. But as you saw the smiles on your children's faces, you began to relax and enjoy the festivities. The music, food, and laughter surrounding you made it easy to forget about your worries for a while.
Still, you were not completely at ease.
It was something you weren't hiding well, gripping the stroller so tightly, your knuckles turning white. You took a deep breath, reminding yourself to trust that your children were safe and having a great time. Their butlers were sure to stay by them, and they had their parents.
Illumi was walking next to you, idly looking at the different stalls with disinterest. It was admittedly weird to see him in public with civilians. As you continued to navigate through the bustling crowd, you couldn't shake off the feeling of unease that lingered in the back of your mind. Despite the festive atmosphere, a sense of apprehension still gnawed at you. It was a struggle to stay present and enjoy the moment after being kept in the mountain for so long. Seeing your thoughts racing, Illumi's hand reaches out for yours, his eyes communicating his thoughts well enough.
"Just a lot of people." You said, squeezing his hand back as you both walked.
"We can go somewhere for a moment." He suggested, waving a butler over to the both of you.
Without asking your opinion, he took you by the hand to a bench not too far but far enough to offer some privacy from the bustling crowd. The butler had taken Sylvia with no objections, leaving you and Illumi alone to finally have a moment of peace. Sitting down, you immediately felt relieved.
Awkwardly, he kept his eyes on you the entire time, unblinking.
He often likes to just watch, not saying anything. Countless times you woke up to the sight of him standing over you in your shared room. His gaze was intense, almost unsettling, but you found comfort in his presence nonetheless after the years. Illumi's silent companionship was something you had grown accustomed to, even if it still sent shivers down your spine at times.
"You know, it's nice to see them like this." You said, breaking the silence. "So… normal."
The boys were both leaning over the stroller, showing their softer sides as they cooed and made faces at the baby. They both turned to you, smiling, their eyes filled with genuine affection for the little one. Much like the rest of the family, that little girl had them wrapped around her finger. Illumi studied them alongside you, his hand now resting on your thigh as he scooted closer.
"Do not get attached to the sight. It will not last. We will only be in town for a couple nights."
His words served as a reminder of the impermanence of the moment, but you chose to savor it nonetheless. Illumi's gaze flickered to you briefly before returning to the children, his expression unreadable as always.
"Enjoy it while it lasts," he replied, standing up as he looked down at you, hand extended.
You simply took his hand, walking with him without another word.
~~~~~~~~
The night went by faster than you wanted. It was nice to see your family together.
A flicker of shock went through you at the thought, your hand faltered as you burped your daughter. The butler beside you wanted to, but you refused. You preferred to take care of them yourself.
You glanced over at Illumi across the park table, who was in conversation with the twins about types of assassinations. The night had been surprisingly pleasant, and you were grateful for the rare moment of peace. In your arms, Sylvia yawned, her tiny hands rubbing her eyes as a grumpy look was on her face. It was about time for bed.
"Lumi, I think we should head out. Sylvia is sleepy."
Instantly, the boys both looked disappointed, but Illumi nodded in agreement, standing up and motioning for the twins to follow.
"Can't we stay a little longer?" One boy asked, leaning forward to you.
"We haven't even ridden the carousel yet," the other twin chimed in, a hopeful look in his eyes. You smiled at their enthusiasm, thinking it over a bit as you gathered everything.
"Gotta see what your dad says."
With a sigh, you glanced at Illumi, who didn't seem too thrilled about the idea of staying longer. A moment of silence went by as he thought it over.
You stood next to him, tilting your head slightly in anticipation of his response. Finally, he nodded in agreement, surprising you and the twins.
"A hotel has been booked in preparation. You can head over with the butlers. I'll take them on a ride or two, but you both have to accompany me to the next mission."
Illumi looked at them as they cheered before at you. Leaning up, you kissed him on the cheek, a rare display of affection from you.
"Have fun!" You smiled at him with such glee, a look of pure happiness that made his heart swell with warmth.
Illumi looked surprised at that, his eyes slightly wider, and he held the cheek you had kissed.
~~~~~~~~
Checking into the hotel was an easy process. The butlers came with you, unpacking everything with ease and swiftness.
The suite was filled with everything you'd need for a weekend retreat. Two separate rooms, one for the kids and the other for you two, a living room connected to the kitchen, and a balcony with the view of the town.
Sylvia slept peacefully in her bassinet after being fed one more time and a bath.
Leaning over the railing, you watched the rise and fall of her chest.
Your children had become your whole world, their innocence and vulnerability a constant reminder of the love and responsibility you held in your heart. The first time you were pregnant, you hated the changes in your body and the loss of control. You had vowed to him you would hate them and that you didn't want them. They would be a daily reminder of what Illumi did to you, after all.
But the day you held them for the first time, all the resentment melted away, replaced with an overwhelming sense of protectiveness.
Feeling sleepy yourself, you rose from the uncomfortable position you were in. It had been time for you to get some much needed rest as well. Going into the master bedroom, you quickly stripped and showered. The butlers that guided you to the hotel had been in the living room, telling you to call for them if needed.
Oddly, they hadn't come to check on you like they usually did.
Sighing in relief, you stepped out of the bathroom. Now you were dressed in a simple nightgown that reached your midthigh. It was made of soft cotton with a delicate lace trim. You would prefer something more casual, but Illumi liked to see you in the finer things.
Idly, you had gone to the dresser, picking up the snack you had brought into the room with you. It was just a fresh abaripe, a blue fruit similar to an apple found in the area, with a small knife nearby for cutting it up. Humming in contentment at the taste of it, you continued to slice it up in your hand, deciding to watch a show before bed.
The sight you walked into made you freeze in shock, the fruit dropping from your hand. A man stood in the middle of the room, the light from the fireworks blazing behind him. You'd never seen him before, hence all the alarms set off in your head. You nearly screamed when you opened your mouth, hand gripping the knife harder, but the man instantly raised his hands, shushing you with urgency.
"I'm here to help." The man urged, taking a step forward as you took one back. "Your family hired me to find you."
You felt a mix of relief and confusion, unsure of whether to trust this stranger. Your eyes are keeping watch of him for any signs of deception or danger. After a few moments of tense silence, you finally lowered the knife and allowed him to speak more.
He explained the situation to you in a fast manner, clearly nervous at the same time. How your family had hired him to find you, how they had spent most of their money in this almost endless pursuit. He had even said he began to help out of the goodness of his heart after seeing them so desparate.
It had taken him years, but he finally found you.
Your heart only beat more, thoughts racing with the realization that your family had been searching for you for so long. You couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions—relief, guilt, and gratitude all at once.
Then, it was all overshadowed by one thing—fear.
Blood rushed into your ears, your chest moving to take panicked breaths. The very room seemed to shrink around you, walls closing in fast.
What would Illumi do to you if he found out?
No, no, no, no, no, you couldn't take more punishments. More bleeding. More torment. More pain.
It had taken years to get this point. The very thought of going back to their basement made you feel queasy, the food you had eaten earlier threatening to come back up. More anxiety filled you as you thought of the worst of things.
What about your children? You can't leave them.
His touch on your arm jolted you, bringing you back to reality. You could see he was sweating, scared in his own right. If he got caught, he was worse than dead.
You weren't much better, looking like a deer in headlights, as he began to pull you towards the balcony. Your feet only planted in place, trying to slow him down if not stop him completely. Your hand is trying to wretch his from around you. His grip is stronger than you would have expected, especially considering the amount of training the Zoldycks have made you endure to be one of them.
"N-no, what about my kids?" You pleaded; you felt your heart beat frantically in your chest. The urgency in his eyes was unmistakable, and you knew he was not going to wait for anyone. Your stomach turned with fear at the thought of leaving your children behind.
"We don't have time. The butlers are knocked out, but we have to move now."
"Let me at least get my girl!" You yelled, desparation in your voice as you panicked more and more. Your vision began to blur from the tears going down your eyes. Nails digging into his hand.
You can't leave them. You can't leave them. You can't leave them. You can't leave them. You can't leave them.
YOU CAN'T LEAVE THEM.
He didn't listen to you, pulling you harder across the room. It was only once his hand touched the doorknob to the balcony did you react.
You put the small but sharp knife into him faster than you could have imagined. You had done it mindlessly and, by chance, got him in the throat; you had almost forgotten it was in your hand.
He let go of you, looking at you in shock as you pulled the blade out. Blood spurted from the wound like a fountain.
It almost seemed as if time slowed down. His hand slowly went to hold his bleeding throat; his other hand weakly reached towards you. The shock and horror in his eyes were quickly replaced by a look of betrayal as he realized the extent of your actions. Without saying a word, you only reacted.
Again and again, and again and again.
You continued to stab him, even as he crumpled against the glass door. The knife may have been small, but it was sharp and deadly, each stab punctuating the air with a sickening sound. Adrenaline coursing through your veins dulled the screams that echoed in the room, leaving only the metallic scent of blood lingering in the air.
Blood coated everything by the time you were done. The moon shone a red glow into the room from the amount of blood on the window. It was now silent, other than blood dripping from the knife onto the floor, a haunting reminder of the gruesome act that had just taken place.
Soaked into the carpet below you, it began to pool around you both. The body of the man was long still, looking into nothing with dull eyes. His skin now has a gray hue to it, and his lips are a shade of blue.
Being this close, you could see how young he was. Babyfaced. Naive and inexperienced to this type of job.
The only movement in the room was the slow rise and fall of your chest as you sat there, staring at what you had done.
~~~~~~~~
Illumi should have noticed something was off sooner when he didn't see the butlers that were supposed to be with you.
He was a bit distracted as he walked into the suite, holding both of the sleeping boys with ease. The three of them had spent longer out, racking up stuffies they won at the scam games.
One in particular, Illumi had won for you. He had caught you staring at it for a bit earlier. It was an ugly, cheap thing with bug eyes, but something told him to get it for you.
The butler put the bag of goodies on the counter before taking the twins from Illumi to get them into bed.
Illumi silently began to walk towards the master bedroom, the stuffie in hand from the bag.
Normally, you would have greeted him by now. Even if you were tired, you always heard him come home. Sleepily getting out of bed to greet him once he entered was a routine you never broke. But tonight, you remained silent. He figured you must have been in a deep sleep; you have been tired as of late.
Once he was closer to the door, his nose picked up on the scent of rust. It was a thick scent that he knew all too well. For the very first time in his life, Illumi felt scared. The worst scenarios ran through his mind as he stepped faster, pins in hand, stuffie dropped to the floor.
Maybe you had hurt yourself? Had he really missed the signs?
Imagine his surprise and relief when he rushed to open the door to find his wife sitting in front of a body.
You didn't respond when he called out to you, still shaken and shocked by what you had done. The man's body had already become cold. He completely ignored it, cradling your face and looking at him. He was just concerned about you.
"What happened?" He demanded to know, looking over you for any injuries.
He was relieved to find you were unscathed, physically at least. You were still unresponsive and shaking, it was the first time you’ve ever killed someone. Your eyes didn't look at him until he repeated your name again. Finally, you met his gaze, tears streaming down your face, mixing with the blood dried on your face.
"He tried to take me from you." You whispered, almost falling into his arms. Your hands gripped his shirt as you looked at him, your voice barely above a whisper.
He cupped your face, admiring the work of art you were, thumb smearing the bloodstains on your cheeks.
"Oh, dear. I'm so proud of you."
A twisted smile appeared on Illumi's face as he kissed you gently. You had killed someone.
His sweet wife. HIS. To stay with HIM.
With your family.
It was where you belonged. 
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ataraxiaspainting · 28 days ago
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Cold Comfort.
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Yan Illumi x F Reader.
Synopsis: You look different nowadays... and so are the people you surround yourself with. Illumi takes it upon himself to take care of any distractions.
Warnings: Yandere themes, stalking, violence, a few descriptions of past child abuse (Illumi’s past), future kidnapping, drug dealing, and little hints of misogyny.
Word Count: 600.
*~*~*~*
Illumi knew you would move away before anything else knew, including your parents and your friends. It was in the little things – something an assassin like him would consider child’s play to point out – your oven being cold, small trinkets going into boxes you had messily put into your closet so people who came over would not notice. 
However, seeing you like this – a gun over your pants in a sleeve around your thigh, hair messily put up and covered by a hat, little cuts on your cheeks – it made him frown. You look so different, not like the woman he fell for months ago. You hide features with bulky clothes and go by a new name; all in a desperate attempt to sway your stalker away, to get Illumi to believe you had simply vanished from this world.
It’s a childish endeavor. An absolutely pointless one, he adds. Illumi had been trained to hunt people down with countless tactics and countless objectives before he learned how to ingest poison without a word, much less any rebellion.
“You said,” You’re trying to make your voice sound deeper, but there are still little cracks of a more high-pitched tone that Illumi notes. “That you’d pay ten thousand. This isn’t what we agreed on, Heather.”
The woman on the other side of the alleyway smirks, still having her arms crossed. “And you said you’d call me Miss Chandler… Guess we can’t all get what we want, huh?” 
There are bags of white powder everywhere you own. Your car, underneath kitchen cabinets, under your bed. Or, at the moment, in your coat pockets along with a small bag amounting to only five thousand jenny. 
Oh how much you have fallen from grace. A kindergarten teacher to just another dealer trying to scrape by as much money as it takes to survive. But by your definition, survival meant getting enough funds to get out of this town and move on to the next in the hopes that Illumi wouldn’t find you.
A shame. Your plan had crumpled in just a matter of weeks because Illumi knew it from the start. The way you held onto your bag when he had greeted you, the way you refused to give him your phone number (He had found it anyway, from Milluki, not that you know that), the way you didn’t let him come over when you had let in male company before.
It makes him feel just a sliver of pity for you, but it is lost within the sea of greed. You haven’t noticed him yet, but neither has the woman. It is child’s play to hide from non nen users, after all.
“Fine,” You glare as you spit the word out, tossing over the rest of the product to her. “A discount.”
The woman smiles and walks away without another word, not knowing that in just a few minutes a needle will be thrown right between her eyes.
You walk away too, and Illumi doesn’t follow you yet. He’ll make sure preparations are made for your new room before he initiates one more conversation with you while you still have freedom.
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envy-of-the-apple · 7 months ago
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Total Care
Dark!Illumi Zoldyck x reader
18+ content
This was a request....that i accidentally deleted...sorry anon!
(Dark Content, Dubious consent, forced masturbation, voyeurism, implied kidnapping)
One of the more aggravating things about Illumi's personality is his attentiveness.
You eat three times a day. You sleep for exactly 9 hours. You get sunlight, time to move around. Physically, you're well-taken care of, curtesy of your diligent captor.
Even pleasure was moderated by him.
"Well?" You cringe at his voice. You still refused to look at Illumi. Looking would make it even worse.
You fought the first time he crawled into bed with you. The second, third, and fourth time too. Your orgasms were always inevitable.
Sex is very important for your health, he'd often say after the 'session'. Like he was being altruistic about fucking you. Like you were the crazy one for resisting when he pinned you down with superhuman strength, making you cum on his fingers, his tongue, his cock.
You don't fight as much these days, but you still make excuses, 'Illumi, not tonight', 'Illumi I'm tired', 'Illumi please-'
To your surprise, he relented at that.
He pulls back, staring at you with eyes that died lifetimes ago. Or maybe they were never alive in the first place.
"You aren't satisfied with the sex," he says, always blunt, always straight to the point.
You don't answer. Saying anything he wanted you to say would be a lie so you keep your mouth shut and pray that this won't accelerate to something violent.
Still, nothing could compare you to what he says next.
"Fine. You do it, then."
That phrase brought you to your current predicament: With you on the rumpled bed far too big for just two. With Illumi sitting on a chair, legs elegantly crossed.
He's so pretty. Even in his worst moments, despite your fear, you could never convince yourself otherwise. Tall. Shiny hair, long and black. A slender shape that's surprisingly well-built. An angular jaw.
He reminds you of a carnivorous plant. They use their sweet nectar to distract flies from their voracious appetite. It makes you wonder if Illumi is using the same trick on you.
You still have your clothes on, but you feel just as naked underneath his gaze as you cower on the bed. His eyes are stripping, bleach that burns your skin. You shift the blankets closer, but you don't cover your body. Illumi hates it when you hide from him.
You know what he wants you to do. You just can't bring yourself to. Hands hover over your shirt, twitching and waiting.
Illumi, as always, picks up on your hesitance.
"Or, I'd be glad to-"
"No." You reel yourself in, sucking in a dry breath, "I'll-I'll do it."
Because anything is better than him touching you. Raking sharp nails over your soft skin. His teeth.
Anything is better. Even this, you try to convince yourself.
When your fingers hesitantly trail toward your covered cunt, he clicks his tongue.
"Take it off," Illumi demands, "I need to see that you're doing it right."
You shudder at his words, but you comply because anything is better.
You should be used to being naked around him. You don't think you ever will. Even if one day, when your mind is obedient to him, your nerves will never forget.
It's not cold, but you still shiver when you hike up your nightgown, right up to your stomach. He's clearly displeased that you don't take it off, but he doesn't say anything about it. Your panties come next. You roll them off your legs, bunching them right by the blankets.
"Spread your legs." Illumi's voice is back to that monotone lilt. You do as he says, widening the gap a little. When he gives a disapproving scoff, you spread them a little more, fully showing your bare cunt.
It's already humiliating, with you half-naked and him fully clothed, but his sheer nonchalance made it even worse. He looked the same, eyeing your body with a blank stare. It was far worse than a punishment.
He gives a wordless nod. You swallow, and then you can't maintain the eye-contact anymore. It's better to pretend that it's just you. It's better to just look down, ignore his stare.
You're already wet. Your body has gotten used to his touches. Your clit is already sensitive. You jolt when you touch it.
It's something familiar. You've done this before. Months ago, before you woke up in this cold mansion, a large empty room. When you were at home (your real home), with a toy that sank into you just right. Illumi didn't provide such luxuries.
You force yourself to drift off, squeezing your eyes tight, thinking about anything else. A hot celebrity, your ex, or just no one at all. You rub your clit faster as your body responds. Your hips twitch, your walls squeeze around nothing.
But he's watching. And it's too much—it's too much—
You stop, breaking down into humiliated sobs. It's enough to make him draw closer. In an instant, he's right there, enveloping you underneath him.
"Don't you see?" He coos, enveloping you within his arms. "You couldn't do it, by yourself, could you?"
He doesn't even give you the luxury to disagree. You find yourself nestled within his grip. His cold fingers replace your own. A long finger sinks into your clenching pussy. A thumb rubs circles on your swollen clit.
You come like that, hiding in his arms, no longer having to see your own debauchery. He gives a soft kiss on your hairline, kind enough to let you ride his fingers.
"You need me, my love," he says. He almost sounds kind.
His smile digs into the top of your head.
"You need me for everything."
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0asisbliss · 4 months ago
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Rust, mold, and dirt. It was once pilled in this basement now it’s a bedazzled room of (f/c). It was sickening how much you hated being with them you wanted to kill them with every once of blood you had in your veins. The bed made you want to curl a up and puke. The slick sheets that you slept in since they threw you in this hell hole were soft, and pretty. You gripped the sheets almost damaging your nails in the process. You heard the door open, and you looked up with hatred streaming down your eyes. Tears were ran down your face from stress, and anger. They came in the room with a decapitated head. What the hell?! Whose head is that? He put the head more in the light. Your mother. It was your fucking mother. Her pretty hair, and the smile you always saw on her face is now frozen in a shock expression. Her eyes a dilated white. She looks like she’s been dead for a while. You haven’t seen her in months because you were stuck inside the ranky-dank basement. It’s official you’re about loose your fucking mind.
MUZAN, Douma, Kokushibu, (DS) CHROLLO, Shalnark, UVOGIN, Nobunaga, Illumi, FEITAN (HXH) SHIGIRAKI, Dabi, (BNHA) SUKUNA, Gojo, Geto, Higuruma, (JJK) Buddha, Poseidon, LOKI, Anubis, (ROR) Chuuya, Dazai, (BSD) or any of your other faves.
600 followers event
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kurokawaia · 4 months ago
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❛ UM, WHAT? ❜
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Yandere! Illumi Zoldyck X Fem!Reader
| YANDERE CONTENT |
WC; 1.5k+ | !MDNI! | TW/CW :: in the pre timeskip, i imagine it to be younger illumi there (so when he's around 18-19 and has the short hair), reader is aslo 17-18 before the timeskip. after the timeskip illumi is 26 and you are 25, stalking!!! death
⋆·˚ ༘ * 𝑅𝐸𝒬𝒰𝐸𝒮𝒯 :: (filled request) Could you pls write yandere illumi who has been stalking reader for years now, he finally decides to make his move, bumps into you, casually invites you for a date. But as you start talking to him, he's so in love and obsessed he lets creepy things slip during casual conversation eg. Reader: yeah I go to dance classes, though recently I haven't been enjoying them as much because our teacher keeps complaing about his life problems! Can you believe it! And Illumi replies "Yes, that idiot should've left his cheating wife months ago haha" and Reader's like, how did you know that *sweats* Anyway just creepy illumi pls:3 - ANON
m.list | hxh m.list
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You were just a high school student when you first noticed him, but only just briefly.
It was one of those ordinary days, but if only you had paid more attention to how this man looked, maybe your life would have turned out different. The man you noticed had quite noticeable features: tall, solemn, a young man who watched you across the street with a curious expression you quickly ignored.
He was dressed in a simple jacket and slack pants, though, his eyes were pericing into your back. You were scared, more or less, the way he was observing you.
With just a headshake, you pretty much forgot the man in your mind, manipulating yourself that he isn't looking at me.
Illumi took an interest in you, for what reason, he did not know. You were just some average girl, not an assassin, and more than likely didn't even know how to use Nen. But you caught his eye.
Your simple life and usual happenings were so different to his own so much that his curiosity was piqued. You looked so innocent that he wanted to taint you to something darker. 
It wasn't very long before curiosity did turn darker and into something more obsessive. 
He started following you more often, always remaining out of your field of sight, and never once approaching you directly. He learned your schedule, your favorite spots, and your friends. He watched over one like a ghost through every mundane task, every joyful moment, and every sorrowful sigh.
Years passed, and that addiction only grew bigger and bigger. The feel of watching you, the satisfaction of knowing everything that happened in your life, made him feel good.
You were his secret obsession, his hidden treasure that no one else could touch.
Then, it happened. You walked down that street, busy with your thoughts, when he decided the time was right. Casually, as if he had suddenly bumped into you, he came towards you. His heart racing from the thrill not of the encounter but of just revealing himself a little.
"Pardon me," he said, his tone silky. You looked up with a jerk since his sudden appearance had startled you. There was something unsettling in the way that he stared at you, yet it was cloaked by a polite smile. "I couldn't help but notice you. We've crossed paths before, haven't we?"
You felt a shiver run down your spine, but you made yourself smile. "I don't think so," you said, trying to keep the subject light.
You had this feeling that you had met this man before but couldn't place with who he was and where you had seen him.
"Perhaps not," he replied lightly, shrugging. "I guess I was mistaken. My name is Illumi. I'd like to get to know you better. Would you be interested in going out sometime?"
"Um, sure," you said hesitantly, unable to shake off the feeling that something was deeply wrong but unable to refuse the polite request. "When would you like to. go out?"
"Would now be okay?" he asks with a tilt of his head, his height was towering over you, you noticed.
"Um, sure," you replied, unable to say no.
You both set off toward a small café in town. You arrived a few minutes early, trying to rid yourself of that strange feeling from earlier. Illumi showed up a little afterwards, his presence still had that air of dread hanging about him which made you uncomfortable, but his smile was warm and inviting.
As you guys settled into your corner booth, you tried to focus on the pleasant atmosphere. Illumi made small talk, his voice smooth and nice. You found yourself slowly opening up, talking about your daily life.
"So, what have you been up to lately?" Illumi asked, never his eyes leaving your face.
Not that he knew of, anyway.
"Well, I've been going to dance classes," you said.
He already knew that.
"Though lately, I haven't really been enjoying them as much. Our teacher just keeps bitching about all his life problems. Can you believe it?"
Illumi's eyes gleamed, "Yes, that idiot really ought to have left his cheating wife months ago. It's pathetic how he drags his personal drama into his classes. Haha."
You felt your heart skip a beat and you froze in shock from his response. "How-how did you know about that?" you stuttered. "I've never told anyone."
Illumi's smile picked up. "Oh, I have my ways," he said smoothly. "I pay attention to the details, you know. It's just a shame he's so miserable. I suppose that's why he hasn't been able to focus on teaching properly."
You tried to compose yourself, forcing a nervous laugh. "Well, I guess you're right. It's just frustrating sometimes."
Illumi nodded, still with that unnerving stare. "I understand. Must be hard on you, dealing with his problems besides your own. I'm sure you are doing your best."
You tried to smile, though the unease in your chest was growing. "Thanks. I guess it just feels like everything's piling up lately."
Illumi's eyes flashed, nay flared, with an eerie serious intent. "Is there anything else bothering you? Perhaps something outside of dance class?"
You felt a little cornered by the intensity of his gaze and hesitated before continuing, "Well, there's this guy at work who's been bothering me. He keeps making these inappropriate comments, trying to corner me whenever I'm alone. It's really unsettling."
Illumi's face clouded for a moment, his frown deepening as he registered your words. "I see," he said slowly. "I didn't realize this. nuisance," he grumbled to himself, cursing himself on how he could have missed something like that in your daily life.
He thought you didn't hear what he said, but you did. A chill ran down your spine at the way he said it.
You hastily tried to change the subject with the urge to get away from the intensity in his gaze. "But enough about that. I'm glad we could meet today. It has been nice talking to you."
Illumi's smile picked up once more, but didn't quite reach his eyes. "Yes, it has been. I enjoyed our time together."
You got to your feet, collecting your things and moving to leave. Illumi followed suit, escorting you to the door of the café. Outside, both of you stepped into the cool evening air, you noticed him freeze for a moment, his eyes set on something far off.
Almost as if he was gauging what move to take next.
"Well, it's time to say goodbye for now, I suppose," you said, forcing cheerfulness into your voice.
Illumi smiled reassuringly but there was something beneath that made you scared. "Indeed. I look forward to the next time we meet."
And so you went off in opposite directions, you homeward. You had walked a way when you couldn't rid the feeling that Illumi had looked at you just one beat longer than he needed to.
Later that night, Illumi sat with reflections upon his mind, bothered by the new information about the man that's been bothering you. How could he have missed this-one nuisance? 
He prides himself on how well he watches over you and has always been fully aware of your every move.
This guy slipped under his watchful eye, and that irked him.
Illumi's face darkened as he made his way to the place where you worked. He found the man who had been harassing you. Getting ready to leave for the night, the man didn't notice Illumi approach him.
The man was turning around, startled by the sudden appearance of the tall stranger. Before he could even utter another word, Illumi's hand had closed tightly around his throat. His eyes widened into a fearful expression as Illumi's voice, in low tone.
"You have caused my precious one unnecessary distress," Illumi said softly, his tone chilling. "For which you shall pay the price."
Illumi made sure the man would never utter another word ever again, his movements calculated and cold. 
The threat to you was gone, and your world would never be disrupted by anyone else other than him. 
No one was ever to come between him and the object of his obsession.
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Do not copy, steal, modify, etc. Relogs and like are appreciated.
m.list | hxh m.list
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cheesecakethots · 1 year ago
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yan!chrollo is the type of guy to try and make any pets you have love him, only for it to fail horribly. any cats you have hiss at him, and dogs will either growl or hide under tables when he shows up. if you have a bird it might start trying to peck him to death.
it’s funny because he’ll be trying extra hard to make them like him, he sees it that if he can get your pets to love him as they do you, you might be a little bit softer towards him (you won’t).
you find it extra funny when he’s trying to flirt with you, leaning over you with a little smirk only for your cat to come along like a true hero and start tearing at his trousers.
i have this idea tho of when you actually make chrollo mad, finally make him drop the gentleman act for just a second, your pets will know before you do. your cat will dart out of the room, dogs will start hiding and whining, birds squawking loudly etc.
pretty horrifying, actually. you’ll be trying to get under his skin, and from the corner of your eye see your cat’s tail spike up, before it sprints out of the room. huh, weir- and then within a split second chrollo is right in your face, leaning over you with a tight smile, asking you to repeat what you just said.
illumi on the other hand does not try at all to make your pets like him. he allows you to keep them at the manor after you beg and beg, but will not go further than a pat on the head or passively allowing it to sit in his lap for a bit.
despite this, your animals love him. cats will rub up and down his legs, purr, sit in his lap, lay on him etc… i feel cats are more his “thing”, but dogs might wag their tails much more, whine when he leaves etc. maybe your bird starts copying the very few words he speaks.
one day he’ll be looming over you, his aura heavy and eyes even darker than usual.
“run again and i’ll break your legs.”
you’re trembling in fear until your parrot speaks up.
“break your legs! break your legs!”
absolute traitor.
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citrus-writing · 3 months ago
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What do you think the phantom troupe would be like with a darling who needs medicine for their mental state? If this request doesn’t suit your tastes don’t pressure yourself to write it please
Thank you for the request! If you have anything else you’d like to see, feel free to request again! 
Yanderes with a darling who needs mental health meds--- 
Warnings: discussions of mental health and mental health meds, discussions of beign denied your meds  
Yanderes who are adamant about you taking your meds, who never let you miss a dose and who watch you take your meds obsessively. Because you're their darling, their love, and they can't let anything bad happen to you. 
Chrollo, nobunaga, uvogin 
Chrollo- he’s obsessive when it comes to you, never careless with the thing that is most precious to him; you. And your meds are no different. He’s certain to make sure you take your meds at the times you're supposed to, at the same time everyday. And if you take some meds as needed, he doesn't mind when you need to take them. He’s diligent with your wellbeing, wanting to prove to you that he can take care of you. 
Nobunaga- he worries so much about you, about your health and your wellbeing, so of course he makes sure you take your meds. He’s not quite as intense about it as chrollo is, but one glaring difference is that he is always the one to give you your pills. He likes knowing you rely on him, and while he’d never deprive you of the meds you need, he’s not above making it seem like he might. So everyday he makes you ask oh so nicely if you can have your pills. 
Uvogin- the least obsessive about your health of these three, uvogin feels confident that if you could take your pills before you can still be trusted now that you’re living with him. Of course, if you prove him wrong about that he’ll have to adjust his strategy, but he wants you to maintain some level of independence, even if you never get to leave your shared home. He will remind you if there’s a chance you forgot them, but other than that, he leaves it to you. He also never threatens to take them from you, because he knows he’d never be able to hurt you like that. 
Yanderes who will take your meds from you as a punishment, who don't mind being the bad guy and taking something you desperately need if it makes you behave. And you’re always so grateful when you get them back, so just be good and don't make them mad, and you’ll get to keep your meds. 
Phinks, shalnark 
Phinks- he doesn't want to take your meds from you, afterall, you’re so much happier when you're on them, and he loves when you're happy. But after seeing how desperately you need those pills, and how you’d do almost anything to get to keep them, he realizes that taking them is the perfect threat. He won't hesitate to take them from you if you refuse to follow his rules, but he’s always willing to give them back once you settle down and start behaving. 
Shalnark- he doesn't mind taking your meds from you if he has to. While he fell in love with your smile and your laugh, your tears are equally beautiful. And if you can't leave to behave, you’ll have to be punished, and really, this is quite tame compared to what he could do. He’ll mock you all while youre without your pills as well, teasing that if you were good this wouldn't have to happen. So really, it’s your fault. But once you learn to behave, he gives them back gladly, ecstatic to see your smile return in the following days. 
Yanderes with a more complicated relationship with your meds, who can't seem to settle into any certain schedule with them. Why should you need these pills when you have them to care for you? Why should you need these pills when you have them to make you happy? Would it really be so bad if they took them from you? But they soon realize that you do need the pills, and they relent. These yanderes are hard to predict in this regard.  
Feitan, illumi 
Feitan- he doesn't mind you taking these meds in theory, but he hates knowing you're so reliant on something like medicine for your happiness. He wishes you didn't need the meds, both because he wants to be all you need and also because he has to supply you with your meds, and getting them is a hassle. For a long while he tries to take you off them completely, but eventually he learns life is easier if he lets you take your pills. 
Illumi- he is on some level offended that you have to take these meds. Shouldn't you be happy just to be with him? Shouldn't you be more grateful? At first, he thinks you're just throwing a fit when you become so distant after he takes them away. But as the punishments stack up and you dont relent, he realizes you do actually need them. He gives them back to you when you’re behaving well, but as soon as you start to act up he takes them away again. 
--------------------
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lovelyyandereaddictionpoint · 3 months ago
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Just Perfect | Yandere Illumi Zoldyck
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The heat underneath your turtle neck collar was sweltering. The coolness of the kitchen counter was unable to reach you through your jeans, only felt when you briefly let your hands brace yourself on it. The cutting board and toaster pressing against your back served as a minor obstacle, shoved to the side by the man enraptured by you. For you, it was a reminder of where exactly you were and the time of your ‘lonesome’ afternoon coming to an end.
“W-we have to stop soon.”
Your neighbor didn’t answer, instead busy himself with harshly biting your lip. Probing deeper into your mouth as he pulled at the loops of your jeans in an unspoken request. Your hands previously tangled in his hair were grabbing fistfuls of his tracksuit; passionately pulling as you felt the burning heat in your lungs as your kissing continued.  The haze upon your mind was addictive, thinking only of the way his mouth never stopped sucking–your tongue, your jaw, your neck. Barely registering his pale and masterful hands slipping under the form-fitting wool to squeeze at the fat of your waist. His hands are trailing upwards speedily making their way to your chest, it was almost enough to put all your worries to rest. 
The jingling of keys just outside the door stopped that immediately. 
With unimaginable haste, you unlatched and shoved the man away. Hopping down from the counter to pull your sweater back down and your pants up. Turning around to fix up the appliances on the counter. You quickly ran to the decorative mirror on the wall pulled the neck of your sweater up and inspected the marks on your face. Specifically on your lips while you sucked at the bloodied part of your lip. Lightly dabbing at it you sucking your teeth, cursing yourself before turning to the door swinging open.
“Welcome home Akaza!”
The black-haired boy didn’t look surprised to see you. Instead, he looked surprised at your state even though you felt like you fixed most of it. Watching him scrutinize your appearance, stopping at your bottom lips. You curled your lips in as though it would hide what was already seen. 
“What happened to your lip?!”
You chuckled nervously,” I bit it–on accident. Is it that bad?”
Adding the extra question you hoped would dissuade him from asking more. Instead, the second year marched further inside the home nonchalantly dropping his bag at the door; leaving it to you to pick up. After setting it nicely on a hook you came into the kitchen where your adoptive son was clutching at the tracksuit of your long-haired neighbor, practically growling in his face.
“How’d I know this parasite would be here?! Oi oi, you listening to me punk?! What’re you doing here!?”
You held the bridge of your nose. That twisted face and tensed posture matched the reports made by so many teachers. You knew this wouldn’t end like those situations in the past. Not if you had any say about it. Not that Illumi was going to let you.
“I think you know why.”
“GGRRRR!”
Akaza quickly reeled back to punch him only for your neighbor to dodge, and swiftly unlatched Akaza’s hand maneuvering him into the perfect position for a headlock. You figured it’d be best to end this now before one of them actually hurts the other.
“Akaza. Illumi. Break it up.”
The teen growled again reeling his fist in an awkward position. Illumi didn’t release him, anticipating the punch.
“Now, Akaza!”
The teen shook his head as he stomped away, avoiding eye contact with you. He headed up the stairs occasionally sneering as he made eye contact with the man standing unharmed and defiantly in the kitchen. Letting out a sigh you let your neighbor come in close as you apologized. 
“I’m sorry about him. I’m sure you know how he feels about you.”
Illumi didn’t bother sharing your worried gaze at the steps. Only intensely staring at you. As he usually did.
“Is that where you’re going this afternoon? To the principal’s office, again?”
Crossing your arms, you already recognized the annoyance in his voice.
“Yes again.”
“You’ve had 6 meetings this month alone. And they all happen on the evenings that are usually dedicated to us.”
You shrugged. “Yes well, that’s just the reality of it.”
“Isn’t there a seaside school you–”
The glare on your face made Illumi quiet himself. Clearly, the mention of that option was entirely off-limits. It’s exactly what he feared.
“Sorry. Maybe a meeting at the end of the month can be negotiated?”
“Unless you can convince Akaza to keep his confrontations to the end of the month, then I don’t see that happening.”
Illumi didn’t groan because he doesn’t groan. Instead, he crossed his arms to stare off to the side. He waited for you to hug his waist, shoving yourself through his locked arms to hold him tight. You enticed him to look at you, smiling when he finally did. 
“Depending on how this meeting goes you can come with us during our victory meal.”
“As if!”
No longer in his uniform, Akaza had returned. Looking disgusted at the affection you two displayed, he donned his shoes again and stood impatiently near the door. The teenager had you swallowing laughter, how could a little delinquent (as he portrayed himself to be) still be so polite? Despite his words, he was waiting patiently for you and he hadn’t gotten physical since he returned downstairs. You’d consider that progress.
“Well maybe during our consolation dessert?”
“Nuh Uh! Your boy toy is just awkward maybe if he didn’t stare at you like you were his dinner I wouldn’t mind.”
You couldn’t hold back your laughter at his assessment, letting a cheeky smile spread on your face. Hugging Illumi tightly you kick up your foot to playfully bat your eyes at Akaza, delighting in the little twitch his nose makes when he’s angry.
“Awww~are you jealous?”
“Blegh! Get a room you creeps!”
“Hahaha.”
Releasing your boyfriend you went over to your son, scratching his hair affectionately before reaching for your coat and shoes. You smile at Illumi encouraging him to leave with you two as you pull out your keys.
“Well then maybe we’ll go see a movie together instead.”
Looking down to lock the outside of the door, you’re vaguely aware that the two of them are speaking. But you don’t pay any mind, you figure it’s a thing they feel like must be done. Talking about territory, counseling books would usually reprimand this kind of thing but Akaza was no doormat and neither was Illumi. It was actually emboldening to think you’d find someone capable of going head to head with your self-proclaimed bodyguard. And even better he was just next door. 
“Yeah, get running track boy.” 
“Don’t call me boy, boy.”
“Yeah yeah get off our lawn!”
You didn’t bother fighting them—this was a peaceful interaction more so than the others they’ve had and you could focus on starting the car while you waited. A few more insults were thrown back and forth between the two of them; finally ending when Akaza slammed the side of the door into the passenger's seat. Only then did you send him a look that had him reopening and closing the door—softly this time. Smiling at him you rolled your window to shout to Illumi,” I’ll text you afterward about what we’re doing.”
Illumi only nodded, watching still as you smiled and waved then you were speeding off. Didn’t want to keep the principal waiting any longer. 
_____________________________________________________
“Aka, don’t you think this is a little…excessive.” You finally allowed yourself to speak normally, now that you both were leaving the empty school. Your son also seemed to relax, putting his hands behind his head as he walked alongside you.
“No. I’m doing it for her. Those bullies made her transfer, it is all their fault.”
He skipped ahead to open the driver’s side for you. Ever so polite you shoo him away back to the passenger side. Back in the car, you sent a wave to the principal who stood concerned while watching you drive off. 
“I know but you couldn’t have a witness or someone recording you defending her?”
Akaza sunk into his seat, sulking a little. You weren’t trying to bring him down but you figured if you offered some playful jabs he’d get your point.
“Like that blonde kid! What’s–his–name is clearly high all the time, I’m sure you could pay him off to back you up.”
You spared a glance from the road, catching the laugh he tries to hide. He rolls down the window letting his hand get pushed by the wind being cut through by your speeding car. 
“Douma is too popular for that kind of thing.”
“But he seems to like you enough.”
“He’s just a masochistic freak. Totally get’s off on the way I hate him.”
“Well don’t flatter yourself.”
“I’m serious–”
You two continued to talk as you’ve always done. When you first met him, he was some flea-ridden kid who you’d caught breaking into a neighbor’s house across the way. Come to find he was trying to pawn off what he stole to afford medicine for his father. You’d seen this kid get caught by the police before and to say they weren’t fond of him was an understatement. In an impulsive rush of good will you decided to be a an anchor for them–coming over with food and necessities. Soon you were paying for school supplies and signing for field trips. You were more than happy when the state offered for you to tak him in. Ever since you’ve been the guardian to a troublesome boy with an inclination for using his fighting spirit to solve all his problems. 
While you had no regrets about taking Akaza there was a glaring issue of your dying social life. Being in a small district for the school, meant familiar faces and a lasting reputation. While no one seemed to hate you for your son’s…unconventional problem-solving, they weren’t eager to get to know you. Those that were–usually romantically—would also start running because of some unknown force your son.
They were scared. 
You understood but it didn’t make anything better. Both you and Akaza only had each other and the few people who were crazy enough to interact with you. One of those being your new neighbor. 
“So icecream or churros?”
“Do you even have to ask?”
_____________________________________________________________
Watching the familiar car drive away from the entrance of the school parking lot, from his phone Illumi clicked it off. Looking back up at the blubbering woman and their teen, expecting something. 
“You stopped.”
The woman nervously brought her hands to smooth over dyed hair, hiding the silver strands that imminently began to appear. 
Shakily coughing she continued, “Right, well as a major donor to the school I’m sure they value me and my son’s opinion quite a lot. It’s nothing personal really—in fact we can make a donation in your name to support such a…troubled kid.”
Illumi didn’t care what she had to say. He has listened to hundreds of seedy or innocent targets try and rationalize their lives. Those in particular, that were lucky enough to get the chance to bargain. Just as usual nothing they offered was worth the pay. 
“Alright I heard you out.”
Unsheathing the needles from his cashmere classic coat, unbothered by the screaming family in front of him. Now he was thinking about who’d he’d kill first? Who was he kidding, he’d been trained to kill them all at the same time. He briefly thought of how inefficient he was when he hadn’t gotten his fill of his fiance. 
“WAIT! What if I got you a new principal!? Someone that could wipe his record! That’d be good ri—!?”
Illumi wasted no time flinging the needles into their necks. Their tied forms going limp on  the floor. That was a great idea, it’d be easier to orchestrate the vacancy of the principal than convincing his fiance to depart with their misfit boy. It’d be even better if the newly appointed  principal could avoid scheduling meeting on the days dedicated to pampering his fiance. 
Wordlessly the corpse of the woman rose like the undead. Standing, twitching occasionally the  corpse moved past Illumi with a mission. 
Illumi turned to join, stopping at a rock song coming from his phone. Letting his puppet unlock their phone, following through with their prior promises; he busied himself with the realization of his phone’s latest feature. The icon of a locator app took up his screen, his fiance’s face adorably holding up a piece sign above the car moving through the map. 
Illumi wasn’t aware that his love had, organized this app on his phone. Let alone made the . ringtone an obnoxiously inappropriate song. Still, he couldn’t find it in himself to undo the effect. It was like his gifts. 
Secret and made for surveillance.
Recognizing the route, he sent a message to his contact there. Illumi texted his fiance, reminding them of their prior offer. Perhaps this evening would still be salvageable; that is if that child would allow it. 
______________________________________________________________
Akaza was planning a murder. 
He’d done his best to keep chatting with his guardian, distracting them from their vibrating phone. No doubt the leech trying to get their attention Long enough for him to silence their phone when they got gas. He’d hope that’d be the end of it. Have his churro–icecream-monstrosity while watching the latest movie for him to laugh at with the only person in his corner. 
But no. 
He couldn’t have that. 
Not with the leech, conveniently being at the theater after they got their tickets. Pulling his guardian into his side while he collects the ticket for the open seat next them. Instead of his parent already turned to snark to him throughout the movie, they were whispering in the ear of the neighbor. Whispering and laughing with the man who was staring blankly at the screen, probably not even watching. The frozen section of the dessert in his hands, melting was just an omen to the night ahead. 
Instead of raving about the movie and they’re parent talking about their favorite parts, Akaza was forced to listen to the flirting of the two adults. Watching his parent pull at the man’s hands asking all the questions that usually would be asked of him.
“What do you mean you weren’t watching?”
“I was too busy looking at you. I didn’t care for the movie, really.”
“Don’t say that, there’s got to be something you like-”
“You.”
“Illumi, I’m serious!”
It wasn’t so bad when they relented to Illumi taking everyone out to eat. It was worth it to see the apathetic man silently accept the addition of Akaza to a restaurant of his choosing. Part of what Akaza hated about Illumi was his lack of emotions or rather the lack of displaying his emotions. Those wide black eyes bigger than olives always staring at his parent with insanity. The man’s strange movements that made him look like a puppet. The very rare smile that has people screaming in public. 
He didn’t know what his guardian saw in him.
Or why Illumi was so dedicated to dating them in turn. Akaza knew he was intimidating enough to scare the people not worthy for his parent but nothing was working. When it came to Illumi the doll-like man seemed all together unphased. More often then not he was making his own veiled threats. 
Akaza knew this angle, well. Others have tried to slink their way, whispering grand ideas of sending him to boarding or military school. But everytime his parent had shut them down, usually sending them away the minute they pushed the point. Illumi was much closer, literally and emotionally. Too many times had he found the neighbor making his parent bashful or stare at their phone in anticipation for a call from him. 
Unfortunately it doesn’t seem like he’s going away any time soon so it was better to lay the law down now. He waited until (Y/n) had left the table, waving over their shoulder as they left for the bathroom. 
“Look stalker, what’s your end goal? Sex, half their estate, you might as well come clean now.”
The pale man’s face showed no indication that he was alarmed or that he was listening at all. It wasn’t until his small lips curved and twisted into something wide and frightening. People around were whispering and a child was crying somewhere. This man was like nothing he’d dealt with before.
“What I want,” Illumi laughed, “has been clear from the start. I have nothing but the best intentions for (Y/n).”
Akaza sneered,”Yeah right. I find it funny you consider…getting rid of everyone they occasionally mention as a problem.”
Illumi cocked his head to the side. The leak of information makes him wary of keeping the boy alive at all. Instead he’ll make a note to handle those listening later.
“You know of my occupation?”
Akaza sighed,”Anyone who lives next to you knows. The thriving garden, the burner phones, and the way you talk about anatomy it’s just too weird.”
“I told you I was a docter, did I not?”
“I looked for your name in the medical registery, there is no Illumi Reldyck. I checked. There is another identity with your name but there’s no online footprint and I’m guessing you paid someone off for the fake certificate.”
The teen had him cornered. He did decide to lighten up considering the man’s hands reaching under the table for something. The thought of him reaching for a weapon did cross Akaza’s mind and he was glad for the pocket in his bubble jacket. Flashing it’s insides, and the insurance he carried as he brought his arms to rest on the back of the booth. 
Illumi was no longer smiling, “I believe I underestimated you.”
Nothing more needed to be said as their food was finally brought by a shaking waiter. The glares exchanged across the table dissipating as (Y/n) finally returned. 
“Glad you two didn’t bite each others heads off!”
Illumi leaned into them, “You told me you would hate it if I did that so I didn’t.”
Akaza sighed,”And I know you’d prefer it if I didn’t beat your boyfriend to a pulp in public. I know better.”
(Y/n) shook their head at the both of them before digging into their meal. For now Illumi and Akaza would be civil, it wouldn’t help anyone to fight in public with all these witnesses around. They’d wait until later to sort one another out. 
Where they wouldn’t be held back by the person they were fighting over. Or the police. Or investigative hunters. Or the organization of slayers.
Yeah they’d have to wait. 
________________________________________________________________
Illumi treated his wounds with the precision an assassin should have. Using his trained eyes to properly stitch at the gash in his leg. He was far removed from the process, after all it’s been years since he allowed himself to agonize over the searing feeling of pain. Instead he preferred to let his mind wander (as it often did ) to the one he endured these very wounds for. 
Despite their inadvertent hand in creating more strain on his body for his next mission, he couldn’t help but let his obsession with them consume even more. To think even a child they hadn’t birthed themself was already strong enough to be an obstacle to a trained assassin. It only proved how perfect (Y/n) was just for him. 
He’d long ago gotten the approval from his parents and eventually the entire family. Sharing a fraction of his extensive dossier about his fiance. They retracted their interest after the 50th page but Illumi didn’t mind. For once he valued the private appreciation he discovered when he first happened upon them. 
It was a minor interaction. One that Illumi would have ignored on the route to a mission. They had smiled while passing by; a nice gesture they did on an especially good days. The assassin didn’t mind at the time. Many very observational citizens might notice him but very few actually acted on it. He didn’t care…at least not at the time. He did care when he found his mind flashing the image of their smiling face while he stabbed the needle into the subject’s heart. 
At first it aggravated him that his attention was divided because of some random person. From a distance he could tell they weren’t particularly strong or highly intelligent. Yet he found himself in a department store’s camera room going through the footage of the sidewalk. Taking the seconds of the meeting on the recorded tape, he began his investigation. His…colleague often spoke about getting enjoyment from his time with people of interest. That’s all he’d call his growing interest at the time. That’s what he’d call it. Even if his investigation had been going on for five years now—he was convinced it was just for an experiment about enjoyment. Escalating from their route to work, to their home, to their room. He watched the raggedy child become a member of their home. Watched them send the delinquent to school. Watched them cut their hair. Watched them crash their car. Watched them go to physical therapy.
Watched them get farther with a lover they’d ever had. He hated that part.
That was when Illumi felt the desire to get involved. To finally introduce himself. To show them the love none of their past flings could properly pretend to show. After a talk with his parents he stationed himself in (Y/n)’s neighborhood. It took a short while to rid the house next to theirs but when he did, everything just fell into place. 
Well almost everything. 
“Thank you for the new job. I was told you had a request for me?”
The voice coming from the burner was calm—the tone of a fellow killer. It was reassuring. 
“The student I informed you about shouldn’t need any guidance. No meetings with them or their guardian unless you confirm it with me.”
The silent static permeating from the phone filled the room. A great background to the alluring  sight through the window. Right across the way was the silhouette of his beloved fiancé, oblivious of his watchful gaze. He couldn’t wait to offer the ring.
“Perhaps I can do more…with the boy…keep him away for awhile longer. Would that satisfy our agreement?”
Illumi let a smile spread on his face as that obnoxious song play on his other phone. The blue light from the window across shining through the sheer curtains. 
“That would be perfect.”
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rotten-pomegranates-fics · 7 months ago
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May I ask for Illumi Zoldyck head cannons please? 💚💫
Yes you may
Warnings: some smut, illumi’s possessive
/|\^._.^/|\ /|\^._.^/|\ /|\^._.^/|\
He’s so protective he doesn’t let you go out alone unless him or one of his trusted butlers are with you
He likes picking what you wear to match his outfits, when he has the green pin suit you have a similar dress with yellow accessories
Takes you on lots of fancy dates and acts like they are nothing until you guys get home and he wants you to pay him back in a different way
Your showered in gifts constantly, you kissed him on the cheek and told him you loved him? He’s bringing you a diamond necklace worth more then the car you had before you met him
Your only to be dressed in the softest robes and the silkiest dresses at any given moment
You don’t have to do anything but provide him with an heir, you have cooks, cleaners, drivers and of course the butlers
When you talk to him like he’s just like you it makes his stomach feel weird and full of butterflies
He’ll get you a pet if you tell him you get lonely when he goes on missions, but it won’t be normal no no it’ll be expensive and exotic like an owl or a tiger that will never leave your side
He loves when you hug and cuddle him, he’s a bit stiff and he never starts it but he loves it
He has like five weighted blankets on his bed, he loves them, maybe it’s because he feels like he’s being buried
Your gonna be kept far away from hisoka at all cost
He rants to you about his problems and he’s never done that with anyone before
He hopes you understand he loves you in his own way even if he only really knows how to show it through giving gifts
©rotten-pomegranate- All rights reserved, don’t steal, translate, copy, plagiarize, claim my work as your own or post it on other platforms.
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novasdarling · 2 years ago
Text
Growing Pains
Yandere! Illumi x reader
TW: Kidnapping Hinted, Pregnancy, Zoldyck Child Training(Idk what to label it as), Sort of Forced Pregnancy and Dubcon, Female Reader.
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A cry woke you from your sleep again. It had to be the fifth time in the last few hours that she had woken up. Heading towards the crib near your bed, you checked to see why Sora was crying again. She couldn’t be hungry again, you swore you had just fed her not too long ago. You silently prayed she wasn’t teething yet, you weren't ready for that. Picking her up, you both sat on the bed. Trying to calm her down so you two could sleep again. Usually, she was in her own room with butlers that came to answer her calls at night, like with the other kids. But when Illumi was gone, it was nice to have another in the room with you at night. Even if she wouldn’t sleep.
Trying to hush her to bed seemed to be insignificant. A knock at the door proved that.
“Mrs Illumi.” You always hated how they referred to as that. Always linking you to Illumi. Master Illumi’s wife. Mrs Illumi. Mrs Zoldyck. Never just your name. “If you please, I can take her back to her nursery.” A butler had walked in. She was new but extremely sweet. You wondered how the hell she got here.
“No, I’m fine. Thank you though.”
The butler left, leaving you with a crying baby. She was the fussiest of all your kids. The others were better sleepers by miles. There was nothing you could really do right now, you had changed her, fed her, rocked her. Looking down at her, wondering what would make her cry like this. You needed to calm her, it would be embarrassing to have to call the butler back because you had failed. Failed to get your own child to rest. She was your child, you should be able to do this. Holding Sora closer, you hummed an old lullaby your own mother used to sing to you. It was more for you than her, a way to calm yourself down. If she sensed your tiredness and stress it would only make things worse.
The cries had finally stopped, looking down you saw Sora peacefully sleeping. It worked, the lullaby got her to sleep. Silently thanking your mother's need to sing all the time. You moved to lay Sora back into the bedside crib, but when you put her down, she woke. She just wouldn’t let you be. Taking her back into your arms, you laid her down on the bed near you. Making sure the bed was cleared on her side. Luckily Illumi had gotten the biggest bed possible. You kept your hand on Sora’s stomach. Humming and rubbing her, trying your best to get her back to sleep. Soon the cries stopped, her heavy eyes closed and so did yours. Both of you letting exhaustion win. Getting the much-needed sleep you both had been deprived all night.
The morning light shining through the window had lit up your room. The drawn back curtains had allowed the golden light to fall in and unfortunately hit your eyes. Waking you up. Rubbing the sleep out of your eyes, looking to the side expecting to see Sora, instead being met with an empty bed. Shooting up you looking around. She wasn’t by your bed, not in her crib. Where was she?
“Sora, Sora? Oh, god where is she?” You were running around the room the room, scared she fell off the bed and crawled somewhere.
“Mrs Illumi. Please relax. Sora is in the nursery with her siblings.”
It was the same butler as last night, she must have heard you running around the room shouting and came in. Her words calmed you down. She or one of the others most of gotten her before you woke up. You let out a breath of relief. She was safe and fine. Thanking and dismissing her, you got ready. Wanting to go see the kids in the nursery.
All you wanted to do was play with the children today, but Illumi was set to arrive back home soon. He'd never allow you to put all your attention on them when he was there. Dressing in Illumi’s favourite dress, as he was supposed to come home after dinner and always liked you ready to greet him in an outfit he enjoyed. It was like this ever since he had taken you as his wife. He had strict rules for you and the children. It was better when you played the part of the perfect wife. After all these years, it had gotten easier. Especially after having Mary and Silva, the twins. You had them to focus on when he was gone, to distract you from him. Illumi even seemed to change. He had always been somewhat kind to you, after all he had taken you and made you his wife because he stated he loved you. But before the twins he was awkward, not knowing how to communicate with you. All he did before was keep the bed warm with you and spoil you in gifts. Even then, it was detached. It was clear he didn’t know what to do with you besides the occasional conversation, sitting in silence, and sex. At least now he was more aware what was needed in a relationship.
Once ready you headed to the nursery. The butler told you all of them there playing. It was nice that there were still moments they could be kids, even if they belonged to the Zoldyck family. Heading down the hall until you came to the room. The nursery was on the other side of the hall. Illumi stated it was best to keep them far from your two’s room. You argued which made him settle on allowing them to have their rooms on the same floor as yours.
Walking into the room you were met with a different view than what you expected. The kids were playing, but they weren't alone. It wasn’t the usual butler that was watching them, no it was Illumi.
“Hello dear. You look wonderful.”
“You’re home early. I thought you were homing after dinner.”
He explained that the target was easier than originally thought so he was able to come home earlier. Illumi was sitting on the couch, holding Sora while watching the other kids play. They all had some features of his. Whether it be his long hair, his height or his large eyes. At least those that did have his eyes didn't have the emptiness like his. According to Kikyo, their eyes were almost like yours. Held the same emotions as yours, but were his shape. Only Silva and Sora looked more like you. Though Silva had his grandfather’s white hair. Born with a full head of it, Kikyo demanded that he have a family name. You were so tired you would have agreed to anything to get everyone away from you and get some rest.
Illumi signalled you over. Putting Sora on the ground to be swarmed by her siblings. Then pulling you down to sit on his lap. A hand on your waist and one on your thigh. He began to talk about his target. How easy it was, the method and plan he used. You always hated how he talked about these things in Infront of the children. They were still so young, but then again, he always told you that soon they would be joining him. It was hard to look at the twins and think that even though they were only eight, they were already getting trained. Being prepared to be taken out on missions with their father. No matter how much you loved them, they would always be seen as possessions of the Zoldyck family. Belonging to Illumi, not you.
“Sweetie, don’t push your brother.” You went to get up, but Illumi held you down.
“Let them be. They can figure things out on their own.”
Illumi went back to ranting about whatever he pleased until he called the butlers in to take the children to training. You tried to ask him to let them stay longer, you had just woken up. Yet, once again Illumi’s word was final. Once the kids left, he led you out of the nursery and back towards the bedroom. Signalling for you to help him undress, he knew you rather have him change his clothes once he got home. It was foolish, but it made you feel like what he did wasn't real if he changed clothes.
“We should have another.”
What
“You-we, I thought we were only going to have the four?” You two already had the twins, Kilian and Sora.
“Yes, but you seem happy with the kids." He turned to look at you. Scanning your face. "Lay down on the bed.”
He was standing there shirtless while your hands were still helping him with his pants zipper. There was no arguing with him. You originally thought after the twins he’d stop but then Kilian came a few years after that and Sora after that. To you, the others weren't planned. At least not on your part. It was only after you found out you were pregnant with Sora that he revealed he wanted four. Illumi tended to do what he pleased with you. In a sense, you were lucky he even brought it up instead of just doing it.
You laid on the bed, watching as he finished undressing. You realized you were still dressed. Your attempts to get undressed were stopped by him. Illumi telling you to just remove your underwear. Doing as he said, sliding them down and off your legs while Illumi watched. His eyes refusing to look away as he crawled on the bed between your legs. He held position you in the middle of the bed. Keeping himself in the middle of your legs. Using his hands to hold them apart while he lowered his head. Moving towards your clit, sucking on it. He was good, too good. It was rather annoying, especially since he was so good at reading you. Listening and watching you to see what worked best, what drove you crazy and right now. He was succeeding. The way his lips attached around your clit, the way he used his tongue. It made you a moaning mess, struggling to get away from him. Only to have his hand come up and hold your hip down. It was mind-numbing in an amazing way. The way his tongue was swirling around your clit was bringing you closer and closer to the edge. It wasn’t fair how he did this to get his way. Make you a puddle so he could do what he pleased. It wasn’t fair, but then again it was better than when you first got here. He just would position you and did what he pleased. Barely even warming you up.
“Good. Almost there.”
You were more than almost there. You were at the edge ready to fall off. Just a few more swirls and you were screaming his name. Gripping his hair, unsure if you wanted to pull him away or bring him closer. It was intense. You were still catching your breath as Illumi wiped off his face and lined himself up. You could barely look straight, too much in a daze. Not focusing on him moving and lining himself up, until you felt his tip at your entrance.
“I-Illumi, I don’t k-know.”
“Shh. I’m not done.”
He wasn’t a man of words unless he wanted to be condescending or rude. Then he seemed to be very skilled with them. It was best to lay back and let him enjoy himself now. If you were good for him, he’d make sure you enjoy it too. But the idea that he wanted another kid was blocking that idea. Were you ever going to get a break from having kids? Sora wasn’t even a year old, this was sooner after than the others.
“Illumi, please, S-Sora's too young.”
“I want a few more and now.” Illumi dipped his head to your ear. Littering a few kisses by your temple and the shell of your ear. While he pushed in. “You always look good-mmmm so tight-when you have my baby.”
His pace was slow while he pushed into you and let you get used to him. The stretch had gotten better over time, it was less intense than the first few times you two were together. Then again, Illumi also learned to focus on getting you warmed up first.
His thrusts were speeding up. His gentleness only lasted so long, he liked to get you off first so he could focus on him. He was selfish in nature, but better than before. His face was buried in the crook of your neck as his hips slammed against yours.
“Good. So good.”
Illumi was in the heat of the moment. Losing himself in your cunt. Fucking into you roughly. The way he was aiming his hips. Trying to get as deep in as possible. Wanting to also hit your sweet spot. It felt good, rough, but good. If he just slowed down a bit he would last longer and make you cum around him.
“Illumi! Illumi! Please, s-slow down. Please.”
“No. I’m almost done.” He was attempting to keep his composer. It was faint, but there was some strain in his voice. “I’m going to put another baby in you.”
He leaned back for a moment, pushing your legs up against your chest into a mating press. Allowing himself to get deeper. He was getting close to becoming too much. You wanted to push him away, but he wouldn’t budge. He was much stronger than you and once he was in the moment, there was very little you could do to push him away.
His grunts were loud and clear in your ear. Letting you know how much enjoyed being with you. He was hitting your sweet spot, ramming into it over and over. He was close, his thrusts were getting sloppy. You were getting close too. It wasn’t fair that he was making you feel so good when this wasn't really for you. He wanted another kid. You knew if he could, he’d probably keep you pregnant all the time.
“You looked good this morning. Laying in bed with Sora. Such a good mom” So that was it. Illumi was getting messy now, something that rarely happened. “I want more.”
The buildup was becoming too much. You clamped down on him, causing him to cum when you did. He held you tighter as he stilled. Filling you as much as he could and as deep as possible. While you were clawing at his back. Illumi was grinding into you, riding out his high. You were trying to catch your breath under him. Both of you lay there coming down from your highs. He came down faster than you, moving off of you to lay beside you. Watching your chest rise and fall trying to catch your breath.
“I hope for another boy like Silva. He’s getting further than I was at his age. Kilian seems to be too sensitive like you.”
Illumi was right, Kilian tended to come back from training in tears. It melted your poor heart. You never wanted this for them. If only all of them were more like Illumi. Mary tended to be a good spy, always telling her dad what you had been up to while he was away. He trained her well. You couldn’t help the way your eyes teared thinking of what your kids had become. They once were innocent little babies like Sora, but even she was receiving some training now and when she got older. She would become like the others.
“They’re kids Illumi...”
“Yes, my kids. They are part of the Zoldyck family and so will the others we have.” He moved closer, sitting up slightly and looking down at you. “I thought we were over this.”
“You're right, I'm sorry."
You remembered how you would cry and beg him to leave the twins alone when they started their training. Sometimes he'd lock you away as punishment so you wouldn't be able to see them for weeks. Spending that time alone crying over them. It was better to let him take them if it meant you could patch up their wounds after and be with them. It was cruel either way.
"Why do you want more now though? Sora is still so young.”
“I saw you with Sora this morning. You were so peaceful with her, you always looked that peaceful when pregnant. You always looked good.”
You smiled at his words. He was always the horniest when you were pregnant or when you two were trying. There was no arguing with him. You thanked him and laid a kiss on his lips. Illumi had come far from all those years ago. He was still cold and calculated, but at least now. Now he had his moments when he was alone with you and occasionally with the kids.
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rosazoldyckk · 2 years ago
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-Yandere! Illumi X Kidnapped! Reader-
⚠️warning⚠️ mentions of physical violence and abuse, un-consented NSFW moments (ONLY KISSING but still worth the tw) and needles.
Fandom: Hunter X Hunter. Character(s): Illumi Zoldyck, butler(s) (not specific)
A/N: I’m sorry if this is absolutely crap. I’ve got a lot of drafts about yandere Illumi, Chrollo and Hisoka so I didn’t really proof read this one😅 hope you enjoy my writing anyways❤️
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"You know how I feel about repeating myself Y/N." Illumi muttured, harshly sticking his needle into your already needle-covered head. His heartbeat increasing as your pained screams filled the room.
"I told you not to engage with them, didn't I?" He questioned, shoving another needle into your skull. You nod weakly, shivering at the cold chains while the burning sensation drew tears to your eyes.
Them, the them he's speaking of were simply butlers, which over time you considered friends after all the things they did to ensure your safety, that's all! Though he is probably no more. Your "lover" hated when you talked to anyone else, whether it was his butlers or even his own family, Illumi hated when you talked to anyone but him. That was the only thing that scared him, that was something he wouldn't allow happen. As long as he's alive he won't allow anyone to taint you, to see things in a different view than him.
It's unacceptable.
"Answer me."
The usual coldness of his voice had a tint of anger in it, which almost scared you, how could doing something so simple manage to make him this angry? "Y..es"
The dark-haired man smiled, a sick one at that. Moving closer, giving a thankfully soft tug on your blood-covered hair, pulling you into his arms. His hands being a bit closer to your back than you'd like. You simply attempted to ignore the sharp pain from the impact, thinking that it couldn’t get any worse than this.
As much as you tried to ignore the pain, it was enough for you to loose strength in resisting when Illumi fully closed the gap, placing his lips against yours experimentally. They were so oddly warm compared to the rest of him, molding to yours with ease as he moved against you. All you could sense was him. The dangerous may strong scent of pine with metallic undertones nearly becoming overpowering and almost intoxicating has he continued to kiss you breathless. It was almost enough to forget the pain shooting throughout your body.
Almost.
You attempted to protest with whatever strength you had left in your body but Illumi continued to cling onto you; the whine you let out muffled from his mouth over yours.
When he finally let you go, he left you breathless - chest heaving while you stared at him once more with eyes as wide as plates.
Illumi rubbed his thumb over your soft lips. Using his other one you run over your bruised back, snickering at your small flinches.
"Why must you disobey me like this Y/N? Why can't you make my job easier?" He whispers against your skin, talking more to himself than anything else.
"I love you so much," He sighed, kissing away from the salty tears streaming down your face. Being hardly able to contain himself in your disheveled state. "I'm only doing this because I love you, because others can and will seek to hurt you. You know I can't have that, don't you?"
You didn't have anything to say, there was nothing you really could say. You were confused beyond comprehension. How could he possibly hold you in his arms, look at you with such loving eyes after doing such unspeakable things to you? He doesn't want them to 'hurt you' but hasn't he hurt you more than they ever could? What could you possibly do now? Were you even in a position to go against his command?
You hiss at the sudden pain from the numerous questions racing through your head. Alerting the assassin much to your distress. The assassin could read you like an open book, studying you and your reactions longer than you can remember. As if knowing exactly what was going through your mind he scoffed, switching from his much nicer expression.
"And what could you possibly be thinking about?" Illumi asked, tapping on your cheek. "Ah, don't tell me it's those fools from earlier. It must be."
You let out a shaky sigh at his challenging tone. He knew he was right and so did you; that look you gave him only confirmed his suspicions. But the little bit of hope in your heart for them to be kept alive regardless of their so called ‘betrayal’, for them to continue helping you get back home. It would be your fault for their deaths after all.
Illumi gathered his needles from your head and freed you from the chains, catching you in his arms as you collapsed onto the floor. He let you go, still staring down at you as he licked your blood off the needles.
Crouching back down to you, he holds your face in one hand. "You'll stay here until you are properly disciplined, I have things to do." Though not realizing what they were you knew they were nothing but good. Pressing one last kiss to your cheek he leaned forward to whisper in your ear.
"Just remain by my side and behave, and everything will be alright."
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ataraxiaspainting · 4 months ago
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Sweet Love.
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Yan Illumi x F Reader.
Synopsis: His stare brings more death than a guillotine's blade.
Warnings: Yandere themes, kidnapping/forced marriage, dub-con, the reader is described as AFAB and uses she/her pronouns respectively, pregnancy, threats of violence, manipulation, misogyny, mentions of physical abuse/isolation, and descriptions of murder.
Word Count: 1.3k.
*~*~*~*
In the morning, you were given a nightgown slightly shorter than the one you laid in the evening before, and your houseshoes were nowhere to be seen. The dress had no sleeves and a space above the bodice which made your collarbones and neck show.
Nothing covered your injuries from the night before – even though you know that everyone knew about your escape attempt last month, and everyone knew the way Illumi dragged you back under the full moon. Kikyo scolded you and threatened to sear your tongue and palms with a hot iron, Silva refused to let you have treatment for your sprained ankle until you apologized, and Zeno won’t even look at you.
Your assigned butlers said even less than usual. Remina merely said two words. Stay here. Haruhi had more to say, but not by much. Master Illumi will be here shortly she said, and then they were both gone. 
You were sitting upright on the bed as your more injured leg was surrounded by pillows – a tactic made by yourself to attempt to not make the sprain worse. Jalil… Jalil taught you that.
“I’m coming in,” Illumi’s voice rang in your ears despite his tone being on the quieter side.
When he locked the bedroom door up again, you smelled something faintly sweet. Soap and shampoo and conditioner, perhaps. Or maybe it was just cologne. Either way, it was odd for such a scent to be coming from Illumi. He usually just used products that had no scent at all. There is less of a chance of being caught, he said when you had asked. His steps were slow and steady. They would be undetectable if he did not announce his appearance prior. It was not surprising, because you know what he is, what his whole family is. 
You welcome him just as you were taught. Illumi simply nodded.
“Illumi… I…”
He puts his hand up, a gesture common among family members when you speak when you are not supposed to. Compared to all of them, you are just a dog. A rowdy street mutt that was taken in by force and must learn what its job is; to please its master. 
“Not yet,” Illumi says. His tone wasn’t the harshest you had heard from him – that title by far goes to him yesterday as he threw around furniture attempting to find you and Jalil. “I have questions, and you are going to respond with a nod or a shake of your head.”
You stay quiet. He sits across from you, leaning on the lower side’s bed frame.
“I understand,” You murmur, not daring to make any eye contact just yet.
“Was that man someone you knew before you married me?” He asked. “Nod or shake your head. It doesn’t matter what your answer is, you know. He is already dead because of you.”
You flinch. When you don’t answer, he asks the question once more. You can feel Illumi’s eyes widening and narrowing with each second that passes on the ticking clock above the vanity. He asks the question two more times, slightly harsher. You don’t say a word because all you can see and feel is red – it’s sticky and warm and smells awful and-
“[First],” Illumi repeats your name enough times to make you come back to reality.
“I’m so sorry,” You whisper, accompanied by a shake of your head.
Illumi’s face doesn’t soften. Perhaps it did in the past, but that feels like an eternity ago. You got away with things back then, as small as they were. When you apologized, it all went away. Illumi defended you against his mother’s ideas of punishment, saying you will learn what it means to be his wife. But… that time never came, the lessons weren’t drilled into your skull enough. You didn’t heed any warnings from the younger butlers. You didn’t learn how to read Illumi’s body language fast enough.
“You aren’t forgiven.” 
His tone is sharper, more akin to a hiss than something more crooning, but it isn’t full-on anger. 
You’ll take what you can get for now.
“However, we’ll continue, and discuss your aborance later.” 
You can only imagine what that means. It makes your heart deflate and attempt to free itself from your ribcage – banging and screaming to be freed from the hell that is your body, that is Illumi, that is this family, that is this mansion, that is your life from now on. 
“Had you lived with this man for two weeks or more during your escapade?” He asks.
You nod. Illumi didn’t seem to like that answer, from the way the corners of his lips turned downward. Then he buries it inside himself now, just like everything else he dislikes and feels and wants.
It’s only a matter of time before that bomb explodes and burns you to ashes.
“Third question,” You grip your knees, onto the thin soft fabric of the nightgown. If you had more hands you would hold onto the blankets too. The pillowcases and the mattress cover too; just anything to give you the illusion of safety and stability. “Did you have sex with this man?”
Your life flashes before your eyes like you’re a moth about to be absorbed by a lantern’s flame. The good memories, the bad ones, everything. Everything relies on your answer here. No. You rely on your answer here.
If he finds out what is inside your stomach, what you have done when you were free to do whatever you pleased, what would he do then?
Would he kill you? Kill the only part of Jalil you have left?
You cannot bring yourself to allow either of these things to happen.
You shake your head. No. No, you didn’t. You don’t want to forget the memory, but you don’t want to scream it from the rooftops either, especially if it means your life ends then and there.
Illumi liked that answer, you think. His kind smile was uncommon, but all things considered, you and Killua were the only ones he ever did smile at. 
“Good. That’s good. Final question,” You dodged a bullet with that last question. You don’t think it can get any worse, and it doesn’t. “Do you want to be a true Zoldyck?”
Not for the first time or the final time, you nod.
*~*~*~*
The sheets were as cold as Illumi’s skin, just as pale too. The curtains were already shut far before you were brought back – his room was untouched because he spent weeks looking for you, after all. Sitting on the edge of the bed, unbuckling his belt, Illumi is grinning. It feels unnatural, like a puppet who has gained sentience or a devil who is learning what it means to be human. His wide eyes were essentially crawling on you, looking everywhere he wouldn’t let anyone else see. 
“You’re beautiful,” He whispers.
The lights are off at your request.
Later, when you assume he is asleep, you take the pin off your discarded nightgown that is on the floor. The puncture wound blended in with the rest of your injuries well, and when enough blood was spilled on the mattress, you wiped off the excess under one of the pillowcases, one of the black ones you think. 
There.
You put a hand on your stomach. The baby shouldn’t be bigger than those little inch-long cat figurines you used to have in childhood, so everything should be fine.
You are now a Zoldyck too.
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