#homoerotic subtext that just ends up being homoerotic

[yuutawe]

TAKE A BITE INTO MY HEART﹕yuta okkotsu. . .

when death strikes down those you love most, a desperate binding vow proves to be the salvation.

ꖛ warnings!‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎(overall) nsfw + angst with happy ending(?)‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎major character death !‎ blood and death (mentions + slightly described) + a bit of gore (hearts) ! cannibalism ! ‎‎‎‎‎‎‎yandere appeals (?) ! mutual obsession ! jjk manga spoilers for the end of the shinjuku battle arc ! i basically threw every rule from the universe out of the window (this is not how binding vows work and im nearly sure of it, lol).

ꖛ about. * reader is gender-neutral. no anatomy specified + they/them pronouns and genderless nicknames.

ꖛ inspired by‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎so, i went back to watching hannibal. blame the homoerotic subtext in the cannibalistic series for this idea.

ꖛ author's note * repost because i can't see my post in the tags (sob). originally posted this in nov 28th.

ꖛ word count ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎1.410 (1.4k)

‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎[ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE.‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎NOT PROOFREAD!]

how do you undo what can never be undone? a person's comfort when someone dies is usually knowing that it was inevitable. this fate awaits us all in the end. soon, in a day or ninety years, we too will be hidden in large wooden boxes, burned and turned to ash, or left to rot in the darkest, most forgotten corner of the world. but death changes people. its touch is not meant for those who remain alive, but it changes them all the same.

as you changed when yuta died.

the flowers seem too alive when they arrive arranged in bouquets, tied with ribbons that are too vibrant. that color bothers your eyes. or maybe he seems too colorless. it's uncomfortable.

that body on the stretcher is uncomfortable. it's unfair and uncertain. when ieiri and the others left the room ── give them a moment of privacy. you know how important it is ──, whispering behind your back as if you were an abandoned stray animal. a homeless animal, with no place in the world. pitiful. like a creature abandoned on the side of a dirty road. everyone stops to look at the tragedy, but not to help. and how they mourn. they cry more than you.

poor things. they were so happy.

swear i don't know how it happened. one minute he was fine, and the next...

i didn't think he wouldn't make it. i didn't expect this.

i can barely imagine how they must be feeling. imagine seeing someone you love die in front of you, like this.

the sound of metal being punched takes you out of your thoughts. the idea of ​​people saying this now, with you right there with his dead body in front of you, just infuriates you so much that you punched the metal tray without even realizing it. simple as that. anger took over your muscles, and several sterilized tools were thrown on the floor. everything so fast. how can something happen so fast?

how did it all happen so fast?

he was fine. he said he was going to be fine. damn it, yuta promised he was going to stay. that he needed to fight, needed to help. your role was to stay here and give support to miss ieiri.

“asshole.” you can hear yourself mumble, your voice choked with tears. “you promised.”

when you touch his hand, searching for a familiar comfort, you find only an empty shell. normally, his long fingers would gently curl to hold yours. those warm hands would hold yours and yuta’s sweet voice would murmur it’s going to be okay, my love. we’ll make it, we always do.

lying son of a bitch. that’s what you want to scream, as the words mix with please, wake up. wake up and look at me. come back to me.

his body is so cold. not cold in yuta’s way ── warm hands and cold body, but cold like death. cold because the blood has stopped running through his veins, icy because his muscles don't move or contract anymore, his organs don't work.

just a few minutes. it's still surprisingly cool for a fresh body, but he's cold in a way that almost burns you. your aching heart can’t take this sight, no.

your body bends, and your lips touch his icy forehead. those closed eyes, those blue and depressed eyes need to open again. it's the only thing that's right. a dark whisper runs through your mind. he could come back, couldn't he? so many sorcerers have already cheated death. why did her scythe need to fall right on your boyfriend?

it wouldn't be like that. not if you're really here to change the course of history. a living and perfect heart beats in your chest — his, static and dead, is still red. it's still possible. it will be messy and completely crazy, but who's going to stop you?

who would try to execute you both? without the higher-ups, the sky's the limit and the new jujutsu society rises from the rubble of the old. and what golden age doesn't deserve its own champion? may he rise from the ashes and become the new champion of a sick society: recovering from the rot caused by the corruption of the old jurisdiction, yuta will overcome death and return to his place, by your side.

only by your side.

the blood is sticky, gooey. the bright red is so grotesque against yuta's pale skin that you wonder if perhaps god created blood to convince humans to kill less. it didn't work.

as the incision is made in his chest, you quickly put your fingers inside his body. a little searching, and with more effort, you hit his heart. great. with some difficulty, you cut a piece and brings it up to your mouth.

gulp. your swallowing is like the ringing of the death bell.

his blood stains your index and middle fingers — and greedily, you raise them to your lips and stain them with red. it's like lipstick. there's a certain romanticism in that.

the price to pay is not a debt that will be collected immediately. this could backfire very quickly, perhaps in a way that no one can stop. but if this gives him back to you—

the doorknob lowers, and someone grumbles behind the door. there's not much time. you don't have any more time. hey, did you lock the door? whoever is speaking, their voices seem like background noise as you lean in to kiss his cold lips.

may you share a life, may you share gifts and curses again. pure, mutual love overcomes every kind of mortal wound and lacerating incision.

you can almost feel a deep discouragement ── no answer. it didn't work? why? do you have to take a life to give another? it would make sense. bam. bam. open the door, they say. scared of what you might do to yourself.

a hand reaches up and grabs the back of your head, pushing you down once more. and yuta leans up, his lips wrapping around your bloody ones eagerly.

the salty tears run down your cheeks, and your hands let go of the scalpel to cup his face in your hands. it’s almost animalistic, desperate, as pure love invades you both.

he leans back, breathing heavily. oh, he is breathing. yuta okkotsu has returned from the dead thanks to you.

“what is going on— i can’t— my head hurts.”

the pain that hits you right after is almost unbearable. it's like being torn in half and then put back together in a completely different way.

he holds you, still trying to shoo away the ringing in his ears. “love— love, what’s wrong?” yuta asks, grabbing your hand to settle you. to push the pain away from your beating heart. 

the heart you two now share. two halves of your heart, shared to pump life through your bodies. you’re weakened, but he is alive. it was worth the price.

the door is broken down with a bang, but you can't make yourself care. your arms wrap around what used to be a corpse, but now is back to being your sweet, lovely boyfriend. he hugs your waist, his fingers grabbing at the flesh as if he wants to make sure you’re real. this is real.

“you’re alive, baby.” you sob, and he gently kisses your tears away. “it’s okay. you’re okay.”

and when the others enter the medical bay, all they see is yuta, who was dead less than a minute ago. he has a new scar on his chest, a vertical cut. the scalpel that was used to help you with the process has long been forgotten, thrown on the floor.

your chin rest at the top of his head, and it feels like you can finally breathe after drowning in grief for cold hours. — years, it’s what it felt like. he nuzzles into your warmth, stealing some for his own body.

his blood is flowing again, but he's still a little pale and the temperature is freezing in the medical bay. he rests his head against your shoulder, watching all the shocked and confused reactions from everyone else.

it's like walking straight into a sacrilege, something impossible, something that should never have happened. the breakdown of the natural order happened here, in this room. and yuta is alive.

alive, and staring at them with cold blue eyes for interrupting your moment.

© made by spiralryomen on tumblr. do not copy, repost, translate my works in this or any other site — inspirations allowed with credits.

[rambyol]

Analysis: The ‘Stab’ 🔪

With the Deadpool & Wolverine car 'fight' scene currently trending, I thought it would be a good chance to share how homoerotic subtext plays into the final fight scene between Bruce and Joker.

"He's penetrated him." - Bryan Fuller, in reference to Hannibal Lecter & Will Graham's fight in the Season 2 finale.

1) Positioning | Placement

In the above image, which takes place after Bruce resuscitates the Joker, we can see that Bruce is straddling Joker. They’re situated this way for a good few minutes, and this position is very intimate especially with Bruce’s hands positioned directly on Jokers chest, and those hands stay there right up until the end of the scene.

Now, one would argue that the only reason for the characters to be placed this way is because they were in the middle of a fight and being on top of an opponent gives you an advantage, and when Joker is unconscious, it makes sense for Bruce to resuscitate him from directly above which is the point from where he’ll be able to put more force into Jokers chest. And I agree that this makes sense for the fight choreography and scene.

However, it can’t be the only reason for why they’re positioned like that. Remember, once Joker gains consciousness and becomes fully aware of his surroundings, he makes no move to push, shove, or fight Bruce off. Perhaps he’s given up, since before he fell unconscious he freely invited Bruce to hurt him, and we will return to this later. Regardless of why he doesn’t move Bruce off of him, it’s evident through his lack of protest against Bruce above him that we can safely assume it, at the very least, that Joker doesn’t mind Bruce is sitting that way.

Consider this also, we recognise that from a combat perspective, if you manage to get on top of an opponent your main goal is to keep that position and how do you do that? You press against them, using virtually all of your body weight. So yes, despite the animation, Bruce isn’t just casually sat straddling the Joker here, they are pressed together, even after Joker wakes up.

2) The ‘Stab’, The Groan, & The Lingering

Have a look at the first image. Here, Bruce is admitting to the fact that he did have fun with John, a response we know that Joker wanted to hear because the alternative choice (where Bruce wishes they’d never met) leads Joker to respond with, “You say the cruelest things Bruce, But I know you don’t mean them.” So when you pick the ‘good’ option, you know for a fact that the feeling between them is mutual—

And that’s when we get to the ‘stab’.

Fullers quote (See top of page) was in reference to Hannibal; (I’m paraphrasing here) Where Hannibal Lecter stabbing Will Graham is meant to symbolise sexual penetration. I mean the term isn’t specifically sexual, he does literally penetrate him. But what does this have to do with Telltale Batjokes? Well, Will Graham getting stabbed is a turning point/transformative moment for the character, from that point forward there’s a change and something has shifted emotionally and mentally in the character. You’ll have to watch the show for yourself, but trust that it’s not necessarily a moment that’s shocking because a person was stabbed but shocking because the scene is so intimate.

Joker stabs Bruce after he hears what he wanted to, that Bruce did enjoy their time together. So when Joker ‘stabs’ him, it’s not a malicious act but a lustful one. Directly after, Joker says, “I hope you’ll look at that scar and remember those good times.” What else, could one put on anothers body, so that when the recipient looks at it, they’d be reminded of their ‘physical altercation’ with the other?

…well...a hickey. Or really any mark.

Still not convinced this has sexual undertones? Good, cause I’m not done.

When Bruce is stabbed, the scene shifts to an interesting angle. (See above) Joker is staring directly at Bruce as he stabs him, mainly to throw him off so it comes as a surprise but if you watch the scene, Bruce groans in pain for a prolonged period of time and we get a close up of his face where he turns his head and opens his mouth, which draws out the sound more. Groaning can be interpreted as a sound made out of pleasure, release of tension, etc.,

Throughout this series, we’ve seen him be stabbed, but he’s never had a reaction like this. It’s usually a short hiss of pain or a small groan. Here, it’s so prolonged and Bruce makes ZERO attempt to stop this, he doesn’t fight back or even grab for the knife, or Joker’s hand. In fact, in the clip, he briefly reaches towards Joker.

Remember when I said we’d return to Joker inviting Bruce to hit him earlier? Well here’s that:

3) Joker - Deriving pleasure from violence

There’s an emphasis on Joker observing Bruce’s pained expression, and with what we know about Joker being drawn to violence in addition to how he’s very sadistic as a villain, a quality that was always present in him when we recall how ‘excited’ he gets by violence or specifically, people fighting, being in pain, and so on.

It’s important to understand that even as John, he always had an affinity for violence. Especially when Bruce is a part of it; We see it at the Stack Deck where he records the fight between Bruce and Willy, The Pacts Hideout where he laughs gleefully at Bruce beating up the henchman (if you choose it), and most notably, recording the fight between Bruce and Catwoman!

Why is that important? Because Bruce & Catwoman are a binary opposition to John and Harley, and their fight scene at Riddler's hideout is perceived as flirtatious to John. At Café Triste, John admits that the fight between Bruce and Catwoman got his “pulse pounding”. In other words, it turned him on.

John is always caught off guard by physical affection, like when Harley kisses him on the cheek after she gets the phalanx key or hugs him after the interrogation with Bruce, despite wanting her attention. It’s not that he doesn’t like it, it’s that instead of physical affection, he arguably prefers physical violence. But only when he can observe/control it.

So my point is, during the 'stab', Joker is watching Bruce's reactions intently because it's arguably pleasurable for him. And Bruce who is at the very least somewhat aware that Joker likes seeing others in pain, makes no attempt to suppress his own but instead 'sit' in it for a moment until he physically can't sit up anymore.

Before I conclude this , I just wanted to mention how the game takes its time to focus on physical contact between Bruce and John on multiple occasions.

Honourable mentions:

A) Bridge Scene

B) Sad/Drunk John

C) Convincing Tiffany

D) The Pinky Swear

(Ending on the iconic one)

Ultimately, this fight scene isn't just one with sexual undertones but also an amalgamation of built up tension which was created over time through subtle physical contact between Bruce and John throughout the game which was finally released.

The End.

【 Any additional info or notes I add on to this will be indicated in pink text 】

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Was Javier Garcia "not bisexual enough" in ANF?

I feel like everyone reading the title of this essay is going to say, "Well, yeah? Obviously? Javi didn't show any interest in men outside of that one optional moment of flirting with Jesus and then he was confirmed bisexual by one of the writers after the season ended. If they wanted to make him bi, they should've done more with it because that's not enough."

That's a commonly expressed opinion no matter where you look, and it's not like it's unfounded, either.

On a surface level, I agree. While I understand the excitement of learning a character is canonically bi, in the case of Javier Garcia it still feels like celebrating crumbs tossed to us by Telltale after they had their cake and ate it, too. They snuck in some bisexual representation at the last minute for queer audiences without it being explicit so the homophobes wouldn't throw a tantrum.

Stuff like that happens. Sometimes the representation is subtle or implied in the subtext. Or, the queerness is condensed into something digestible and sanitized for straight audiences. Or, it's stated after the fact with little to no actual evidence to support it in canon.

Hell, even if it is obvious, like with Clementine being bisexual in TFS, you still have biphobes who will die on the hill of denial. Even now, in the year 2024, we have people insisting "Clem being bi came out of nowhere! They should've showed it in earlier seasons if they wanted it to make sense. I'm not homophobic but here's my essay PROVING that violentine is bad and forced and that Clem isn't bi!" Or, on the other extreme, "Clementine is a lesbian to me, bisexuality isn't real :)"

But I've already talked about Clementine and what her bisexuality means to me. I want to talk about Javier now.

He's an interesting case, both in the way his queerness was handled and portrayed in the game, and how audiences received it... as in, a lot of people said, "That's great and all, but is it really representation when it's not actually present? It's not enough."

That. That right there: "It's not enough." That's what I want to break down and examine.

Is Javier Garcia not valid as a queer character because he didn't reach this concept of "enough" in the eyes of the player? But what would have been "enough" then? Do people really understand what they're asking for when they discuss what they think Telltale should've done? Does it actually matter if Javier is queer when it comes to the plot and his journey as the protagonist, and if it doesn't matter, is that okay?

Should we just accept these crumbs sprinkled in our hands?

I want to make it clear that I'm but one bisexual examining a bisexual character and doing an analysis. I've climbed out of my bog to write this because I want to discuss Javier and the writing as it pertains to his queerness, or lack thereof. I'm also aware that I'm not providing any irrefutable, concrete evidence here one way or the other; I'm speculating about Javier through a queer lens. I encourage any other bi, pan, or other queer person to add to these discussion points, whether in agreement or not.

Prior to TFS, the queer representation in TWDG wasn't great...

Though the games do get progressively gayer as the seasons go on. And some even get to live! Progress!

S1 had... uh, none? Wait, is that right? ...Yeah, no, I'm tuning my gay radio and it isn't picking up any signals, Captain. Nothing gay in these waters.

S2 had Walter and Matthew, who both died shortly after being introduced. There's some homoerotic undertones between Luke and Nick but nothing was ever confirmed. Also, they both died, so... not great.

The Michonne mini-series had Jonas and Zachary, but Zachary will always die no matter what. Jonas can die, too, but it's determinant. Paige was confirmed to be queer by the writers, though. Uh, progress? Kind of? Not really, it's never talked about and you only pick up on her feelings for Sam if you squint and pay close attention. But hey, at least she got to live!

Then, in ANF we have Javier, our playable protagonist, and Paul "Jesus" Monroe, a gay character who also showed up in the comics and TV show. Would'ja look at that, they both got to live! I should also mention nothing was ever confirmed about Ava but... c'mon, y'know? Captain, there's a faint signal on my radio; when you know, you know. Except she died, to, so... still not great.

Then came TFS, who really said, "Screw you, here's all the gay!"

They gave us bisexual Clementine with both of her romance routes. Violet, Minerva, James, mentions of his past boyfriend, Charlie... Aasim was planned to be bisexual and I don't see why we can't reclaim that for him, and one day I'll crawl out of my bog to write my analysis on the queer-coding/subtext of Louis' character because if I read "lmao Louis is such a Straight" one more time, I'm going to let the gators take a bite out of me just so that I can feel something other than irritation for once.

Sigh. It's so hard being a "Louis ain't straight" truther out here, so few understand.

My plights aside, there's no avoiding the queerness of TFS. Even if your Clementine doesn't romance anyone, or romances Louis, you can't avoid the fact that Violet and Minerva were girlfriends at one point. It's determinant if James will tell you about Charlie, but that doesn't change the fact that James is gay.

But it runs deeper than that. This is a story about these troubled youth who were abandoned by their families and teachers, the ones who were supposed to love and help them, because "something was wrong with them, they did something bad... they need fixing."

These young people have to fight against an oppressive group of adults looking to steal their autonomy, change them, mold them into what's expected to survive. Their identities don't matter to the raiders. All the raiders care about is erasing such identities so that they fall in line and obey, and if they don't comply, they die... or worse.

Yes, it's a story about Clementine and AJ finally finding a home, but no matter how you play, it's also a narrative steeped in queer themes and subtext. You can tell that the people who made it not only cared about these things and wanted them weaved throughout the story, but that some of them were queer themselves.

But where does that leave us with Javier?

With everything TFS did, it's easy to look back at ANF with a critical eye and pinpoint its flaws in every aspect. While I don't believe it's the worst game Telltale ever made [I mean, Minecraft Story Mode exists], in my opinion, it's the messiest game in the main series. It's not bad, but I'd much rather play S1 or TFS.

For all the criticism it received, most players did like Javier as the playable protagonist. Well, they did once they got over the fact that Clementine wouldn't be taking on that role again, and was instead relegated to only being playable in flashbacks.

Javi's personality can vary depending on player choices, but for the most part, he's a charismatic man who loves his family. He used to be a professional baseball player before he was booted from the league for gambling. He can be cocky and sarcastic, and it usually lands him in trouble. He tends to cope and deflect using humor. He has a past of being irresponsible and selfish; he wasn't even there when his father died, despite knowing he was dying of cancer. His relationship with David is complicated, only made messier if he and Kate end up together. He's trying his best... for the most part. Javi even ends up being a father figure to Gabe and Mariana after they all thought David was dead, and he's very open about his grief following Mariana's death.

But given everything we learn about him while playing ANF, how do we know Javi isn't straight? After all, his main love interest is Kate, a woman. He also has opportunities to flirt with Eleanor, another woman. He doesn't show any signs of being attracted to any of the men who are around... until Paul "Jesus" Monroe.

At the end of ep5, Javi and Jesus have a conversation where one of the dialogue options is, "I like you, Jesus." Granted, that doesn't have to mean "like-like;" you can say you like someone without any romantic intentions. Plus, Jesus IS a cool character. Players who picked that option likely weren't thinking of it in a romantic sense.

It's the way that Jesus responds to this option, though: a flirtatious smile, lidded eyes, the deep dip of his voice.

Javier: I gotta admit, man. You're a fucking badass! Jesus: You're a real charmer... You know that? Through and through.

It's not difficult to see Jesus is being flirtatious, and Javi sees it, too. How does he react?

Forgive me, but I'm about to over-analyze this six-second gif. I love his reaction so much. That subtle jump of his shoulders as if a jolt just ran through his gut at the way Jesus lowers his voice. Surprised, and then the movement of the brows, the slide of the eyes, and the little upturn of the mouth says to me "Oh… oh." Caught off guard, perhaps a little bashful.

Option 1: Javier: Oh, you know what they say. Takes one to know one. Jesus: That they do. Option 2: Javier: Are you really sure you don't want to stay? There's room. Jesus: Oh, uh... I'm sure there is, but... we got other people depending on us, Javi. Just the way it is. Option 3: Javier: Meant to tell you... That, uh, armor you got is great. Jesus: Oh... Oh, uh... Hmm... Well, uh... Thanks, um... It gets the job done.

Javi knows what Jesus is getting at regardless of your choice. He understands this is flirtatious, but is startled since he likely didn't consider that Jesus likes men, too. We the audience have a better chance at knowing if, especially those familiar with the character from the comics and the TV show. Javi wouldn't because why would he? It's not like Jesus is obvious and flaunting with the fact that he's gay.

What's funny about that is, given our topic of discussion, we could also argue that Jesus wasn't gay enough, couldn't we? If we're going to pick on Javier for not being more open about his sexuality, then it's only fair that we pick on other characters, no? Did Jesus need to be gayer? Would that improve ANF?

In fact, now that I think about, was James gay enough in TFS? Was one moment where he talks about his boyfriend, a scene that's determinant so not every player got it, enough? What about Minerva? We know she and Violet were girlfriends before Marlon traded her away, that's information that's unavoidable, but did she actually reach this apparent high standard of "enough" in the eyes of the audience?

Are we entitled to unequivocal evidence of queerness, and the heaping amount we deem necessary, otherwise it's not good enough and shouldn't be bothered with at all? Are more casual displays of queerness bad?

I can already hear people jumping to defend James and Minerva, and likely Jesus, against this because "it's totally different!"

Sure. Javier's situation is different from James, Jesus, and Minerva's respective situations. James actually uses the word boyfriend and he keeps a picture of him and Charlie in his pocket. Jesus appears in The Walking Dead universe outside of the game with more evidence of queerness. Minerva's past relationship with Violet is made clear even when you don't pursue Violet's route, not to mention the underlying metaphor of conversion with her being changed/brainwashed/traumatized by the raiders to be just like them.

Javier is different because that scene with Jesus is the only in-game evidence of his queerness, right? Then he had to be confirmed as bisexual by one of the writers once ANF ended.

Surely, they could've brought up the fact that Javier's bi earlier, right? Made mentions of a past boyfriend, or had a flashback about Javi coming out to his family? Why only let him flirt with Kate and Eleanor? Why wasn't there an option to flirt with Tripp, or some other male character? What about a darker turn where David didn't accept Javi for it? David's portrayed as an antagonist, anyway, why not toss a little homophobia into the mix? Why not reveal it if Javi rejects Kate? What if Kate was so hurt by the rejection that she asked him, "It's true, David was right. It's because you like men, isn't it?"

It feels like they decided at the last minute to just toss it in, like someone walked into Telltale one day and said, "Y'all, I just thought of the funniest thing- Javi should be bi so that we can make jokes about him swinging both ways!" And then everyone clapped.

Here's the deal: Something about this sits differently with me, and that's probably thanks to one of ANF's writers, Adam Esquenazi Douglas.

He's the one that confirmed Javier as bisexual.

Adam had his hand in writing for 4/5 episodes, and he said he wrote the scene where Javi can flirt back with Jesus, but it's that last line of his: "After all, they always say write what you know."

I don't know how many of you who are reading this are writers, or creators in general, but I assume many of you are. It doesn't matter if you write fanfiction, create fanart, write essay posts or headcanons or whatever. I have a firm belief that creative people pour so much of themselves into their work that, if given enough material and studied enough, you can get a glimpse of their soul. Even if done unintentionally, we project ourselves into these works; the characters, themes, conclusions, everything.

Am I suggesting that Adam was secretly a bisexual mastermind who threaded queerness throughout the entirety of ANF and we were all too blind to see it? No, and if he did, then he needs to step forward and tell me so that I can study ANF frame by frame to compile the secret evidence into a new essay.

...Actually, on second thought, maybe don't do that to me, Adam.

My point is, yes, it's true that it's likely Javi being bi was added in at the last minute... but can we really dismiss Javier as "not bisexual enough" when Adam had influence over Javi's character throughout the whole season? And I ask again: is the casual queerness of Javier bad?

Time to speculate and answer some of those questions about Javier

Let's talk about Kate for a minute. She is Javier's main love interest, whether you choose to accept her feelings or not, so she can give us a good point of reference for what Javi looks for in a partner.

Kate and Javi share a similar sense of humor that bounces well between the two. Kate wants to travel, Javi's well traveled from his time as a profession baseball player. They both exist in this space of "we're kind of the family screw up." Granted, Javi's more in it than Kate is, but you can see parts of her that come through where she's a little rebellious, a little not good enough [ironically]. They both feel trapped in their situations; Kate in her marriage, Javi in a slow downward spiral of not knowing what to do with himself now that he's booted from his career. They have complicated relationships with David, and together, they've raised Gabe and Mariana through the years after they believed David was dead.

They're a lot alike in many ways, so this is hardly an opposites attract type of romance.

What's interesting is if you then look at Jesus, he has some similar qualities to Kate; a sense of humor even when things are looking bleak, they to help and protect people, are willing to throw themselves in danger to save Richmond. Then if you add Eleanor, the other person Javi has some flirtatious dialogue with, you can apply those qualities to her, as well... though the big difference with her is Eleanor sells the group out because she wants to stay.

With the little information we have, we can speculate on Javi's preferences. He prefers someone more similar to him. I know, I know, everyone loves a good opposites attract tale, they're so different but similar at their cores, they fill in each other's gaps, yada yada... except not everyone is like that, obviously.

My working theory is that a partner who would act as the opposite of Javi would be someone who acts like David... and does Javi really want to date someone like his brother? Though that then opens up a whole can of worms since if Javi and Kate are so similar, and David married Kate... this isn't an essay about David, but that's certainly a thing to chew on.

With that, I suppose we can answer the question, "But if Javi's bi, why didn't he flirt with any men prior to Jesus?"

What men?

No, seriously, where are all these men Javi's supposed to flirt with? Are they hiding? I know you hid them in the game, Adam, where are they?

Wait, do you mean Tripp?

I don't want to step on the toes of any Javi/Tripp shippers out there, but let's actually think about this. When we meet Tripp, Javi's just been separated from his family. He was knocked out and tied up by these assholes who caught him siphoning their gas, then this teenager cut down a tree which resulted in him getting into a car accident. Said teenager then tried to rob him before agreeing to escort him back to his family but first, they gotta go to Prescott. I wouldn't say Javier's in the flirtatious mood by the time he meets Tripp.

But he can flirt with Eleanor, right?

So, why not Tripp?

Because Tripp is a man and he has feelings for Eleanor. That's made quite clear from ep1. He told Javi that he and Eleanor had a thing once. Sure, Javi could still harmlessly flirt with him, but have we stopped to consider that Javi isn't as confident with openly flirting with men like he is women? After all, who initiated the actual flirting between him and Jesus in ep5? That would be Jesus, and it happens after the danger is over and Javi doesn't have to worry about dying for a little bit.

Listen, I understand that Tripp is big. He's built like the lumberjack of our dreams. He has a nice beard. He's not afraid to talk about his feelings even when he fumbles all over them. He's strong and caring and brave. He could easily toss me over his shoulder like I'm a sack of flour and then throw me across the room... what's not to love? Surely, if Javi actually liked men, he would've made a move on Tripp at some point.

Except, would he? Is Tripp even Javi's type? Because I'm pressing X to doubt.

Also, why does he need to?

This is where I question why some people think Javi has to flirt with a bunch of men to "prove" he's bisexual? I'm sorry, do you believe there's a quota all bisexuals have to meet to maintain their membership card? You have to flirt with this many genders a month otherwise they'll revoke your premium status?

Sometimes I wonder if people unintentionally lean into the "promiscuous bisexual" stereotype, or if they do genuinely believe that bisexuals have to express interest in multiple people of different genders in order to prove themselves queer enough.

Did we ever stop to think that Javi's just not like that? An open flirt, I mean. Yeah he's charismatic and funny and all that, but Kate, Eleanor, and Jesus all initiate the romantic dialogue with him first; Kate tells him she needs to get laid hint hint, Eleanor calls him pretty, and Jesus calls him a real charmer.

Tripp never gives him any indication that he's interested or that he even likes men, so why would Javi make a move?

As for any other man? Again, what men? Max? Dr. Lingard? Clint? Conrad? And forget adding a new character to ANF; it could barely handle the characters it already had and you want to add a new one just for Javier? Let's face it, Tripp was the best option and that's just it, he wasn't an option.

"But my Javi WOULD flirt with Tripp and the game didn't give me the option!"

And there it is.

Javier isn't your OC

ANF isn't a massive RPG where starting a new game brings you to a character creation menu, and you get to decide every factor about the character you want to play.

ANF is an episodic, point-and-click Telltale game, and Javier isn't your OC. Like with Lee and Clementine, there are some things you just don't get a say in, and I think that gets to the player sometimes.

When I sit down to play a Dragon Age game, I go into it knowing that my character is mine, I get to decide who they are and who they're interested in. DA as an RPG has the capacity to give me a bunch of romantic options both in and out of my party that shape who my character is.

When I sit down to play TWDG, I go into it knowing that while I have my own Lee, Clementine, and Javi, I didn't create them but I am influencing who they become. I know it's a Telltale game, and that means limitations.

These games have always had the "illusion of choice" criticism chucked at them from the beginning. Usually that pertains to the choices you make that affect the overall story, but ultimately don't matter in the end.

For example, it doesn't matter if you save Carley or Doug because no matter what, they both die. My counter-argument for this has always been that the choice does matter in the way that it shapes your playable character, and how if affects the characters around you. A Lee who saved Doug over Carley had reasons for making that choice, and in turn, has a different experience going forward than a player who chose to save Carley.

Does it matter who shoots Duck in the woods after he's bitten? Or if he's left to turn? No matter what, he's going to die, so is that the illusion of choice? I don't believe so, because it does matter. It affects player experience.

That being said, I believe players who become invested in this series, especially those who engage in fandom, develop a warped sense of what should've been, forgetting the nature of a Telltale game. I know this because that's the foundation my blog was built on.

Javier Garcia isn't a blank slate. You didn't create him. He had a life before the start of the game, he has a personality that you didn't choose for him, and there are things you have no control over. If anything, we act as an influence over the TWDG playable protagonists. Most every option given is something that could reasonably play into their character. I say "most" because we all remember that [GLASS HIM] moment where Javi tells David that Kate's going to leave him and we were all like "THAT'S NOT WHAT I THOUGHT THAT OPTION WAS!" and it felt out of character.

Anyway, you don't dictate who these characters are but you get sway over the direction they take.

Javi can be a real prick to everyone, but that plays into the selfish and entitled part established with his character from the beginning. You can play him as genuine, trying to step up and do better for the sake of his family, another thing brought up from the very beginning.

"But why couldn't I make Javi flirt with Trip!?"

Because it's not an option. I don't know what else to tell you. I don't know what you want me to tell you.

ANF is a Telltale game that centers about Javier Garcia. It's a story about a man who, prior to the outbreak, screwed up and was wasting his life away. His relationship to his family sat upon a rocky foundation, crumbled by his own hands. He wasn't even there when his father died. We follow this man through a story of a family trying to survive, we watch him reunite with his brother and risk losing everything that kept him grounded and going. He experiences grief and anger and sorrow and happiness. In the end, he comes out of it all a different man, for better or worse.

That man just also happened to be bisexual.

And that's the thing: This isn't a story about Javier's sexuality. He isn't going around making moves on these elusive men that mastermind Adam Esquenazi Douglas maybe hid in the game somewhere because the game isn't about Javi liking men.

It's a game about his complicated relationships with Kate and David made messy by Kate being in love with him, and whether or not Javi loves her, too.

It's about Javi helping Clementine back on her path after she's been alone and bitter for so long. It's about them fighting to take down a group of people doing really shitty things to other communities. It's about losing Mariana and avenging her by killing the man who shot her. It's about Gabe feeling conflicted about his father, a man he always wanted to be just like, after realizing that David isn't this idealized figure Gabe thought he was.

It's about the promise Javi made to his father.

The fact that Javi happens to be bi doesn't matter in the grand scheme of the plot. It's just something that's apart of who he is, but because it's a small detail we feel was added in at the last minute, we decide it's not enough.

But what if it is enough? Do we even truly know what this concept of "enough" is?

Throughout writing this piece, I've found myself in a loop.

I'm happy Javier is bisexual. -> But should I be? -> We shouldn't settle for crumbs, we deserve more explicit representation. -> But is there really anything wrong with casual representation where the story doesn't focus on sexuality? It doesn't take away from other stories that do. -> I'm happy Javier is bisexual. -> But should I be?

Lather, rinse, repeat.

Queer stories are important and our voices need to be heard. We need stories that don't shy away from experiences that are hard to stomach. We need queer stories told by queer people. We need stories that are unapologetic, that aren't afraid to face their audience with pride. Stories that don't say "yeah but we have to bend a little to the bigots to maximize our profits." We need these stories that inspire us, hurt us, make us cry and piss us off. We need queer stories with happy endings that give us hope, that push us to seek a better future so that new generations of queer people don't feel alone in their struggles. We need queer stories that make us feel heard, seen.

Do stories with casual representation of queer characters fit in there somewhere, too? I think they do, because TFS is a casual representation story.

Clementine is bi and it isn't a big deal; she never has a moment where she's openly questioning, she doesn't have this big coming-out scene, there's no tears shed or anything. She isn't stomping around with her bi pride flag and announcing who she is with a heartwarming speech.

She just is.

Same thing with Violet. She never comes out to Clementine as a lesbian, no one ever calls her that, she just is.

Clementine's romance with Violet is treated just as it is with Louis, sincere and normal. No one questions her or Violet because to the Ericson crew, it is normal. They knew Violet and Minerva were together before but no one has any quips about it, positive or negative.

If you romance Violet but then save Louis, he makes mention that Clementine and Violet are close so why save him? But Louis, for as much as people side eye him for making jokes and never taking anything seriously, doesn't say anything more. He could've made a joke, "Ah, you like girls, I guess I never stood a chance then, haha." He doesn't, because it's not something out of the ordinary for him and it's not something he feels the need to pry over.

If you go fishing with Violet and Brody, you find the carved heart with Violet and Minerva's initials and AJ asks what it means. Clementine can tell him they were girlfriends, and AJ doesn't go, "Oh, that's weird," or "Huh, I didn't know girls could like each other." He just goes, "Oh. Love." and moves on because he grew up differently, it isn't a big deal to.

Even the antagonists aren't out here spewing homophobia, at least that I recall.

The Ericson crew are a generation that understands and accepts. Where Clementine could end up with either Louis or Violet and no one will raise a brow, or even feel compelled to signal their alliance like, "Ah, yes, I am accepting of you and your choice, good for you, I am an ally, I'm making this about me."

The Final Season of TWDG is great, and it proves that the writers at Telltale at the time wanted to explore these topics earnestly. It wasn't pandering or trying to score "woke points" with the LGBTQ+ community like some bigots will insist. If it were, it would've been way more obvious about it, I think.

Casual queer stories or serious stories that tackle the hardships of being gay?

Like the bisexual I am, I like both and everything in between.

Clementine didn't need to prove her bisexuality as "enough" in TFS, but since the circumstances were different, did Javier?

I'm going to take the potentially controversial road and say no. I understand why we wish they did more, and I understand why people have frustrations over creators dropping that information without actually having to commit in their work... but I also have some appreciation for the casual reveal of Javi being bi, regardless of why it was dropped.

Javier is valid. He didn't need to "prove" anything.

In a way, I believe we do have some control over the portrayal of Javier, and that's by engaging in fandom. If you were disappointed that Javi's queerness wasn't explored in game, then find a fic that does explore that side of him, or write your own. Engage with other people and their work about it. Comment on fanart, fics, and thought pieces. Write brain dumps. Find other Javi/Tripp shippers and prove me wrong, prove that Tripp is indeed Javi's type and have fun while doing it.

Telltale gave us the crumbs, so let that inspire us to bake a cake.

I don't think this concept of "not enough" is the most productive way we could go about discussing topics like this. Not everyone has the same level or standard, and every work is a unique case. But I think it is fun and productive to share ideas of what we would've done differently so that it may inspire us.

ANF, for all of its flaws, could be a tool used to teach us where our priorities are in storytelling, and influence what we want to create ourselves.

In conclusion: Javier Garcia is enough to me.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to crawl back to my bog and begin research into the meaning and metaphors behind walkers and their existence.

But before that, I want to give a big thank you to @pi-creates for making the Javi gif used in this essay, as well as for listening to all my bullshit during the writing process.

[thepetitepiper]

For anyone who think that Garak x Bashir in Lower Decks is "fan-service," "sickening," or "ruining Star Trek", have you been paying attention?

Note this is not for those who aren't a fan of the couple or never saw it in DS9. This is for those who are actively complaining or find it "problematic".

To the complaints about fan service, have you SEEN Lower Decks? Lower Decks is filled with Easter eggs and fan service, but not just to appease or cater to the fans. It is evident that the show is made with love and understanding of Star Trek. Sure, it has a different tone and style, but the adoration of all things Star Trek is palpable. The amount of references made to various forms of Star Trek media, even lesser-known or less popular versions, is extensive and weaved humorously yet beautifully through the show.

"Fissure Quest" is another excellent example with Jolene's return as T'Pol, Alfre Woodard as Lily Sloane, more Curzon Dax, another EMH with a mobile emitter, promoted Harry Kim (Garrett Wang), etc. Also note that some of these actors had negative or frustrating experiences with aspects of their Star Trek journey (due to a previous show-runner) and I have such an appreciation for Lower Decks giving them, hopefully, a positive experience (similar to Jerry Ryan getting another opportunity to play 7 of 9 in Picard without Kate).

As for the complaint of making a fan favorite ship canon for the shippers. Did you not watch DS9? The actors have specifically stated they were playing up the flirtations and chemistry between the characters. Andrew J. Robinson played Garrat's first meeting with Bashir as "he was sexually attracted to this good-looking young Starfleet doctor." This ship was not just fans "seeing somethign that wasn't there" is was 100% there and intentional from both of the actors. Even one of the writers admitted that the character or Garak specifically should have come out of the closet after the episode "The Wire" but never asked if they could (the assumption being that it would have been quickly shot down so they didn't try).

Rumor has it that the questionable relationships that both characters end up in were to distract from the obvious homoerotic subtext. Garak and Ziyal not only had little chemistry, the age gap was also rather wide and disconcerting for many fans along with Robinson himself. As for Bashir and Ezri, they were put together in the final season after Ezri's character was created to replace Jadzia. This relationship would never had happened if Terry Farrell (Jadzia Dax) hadn't left the show after season 6. She wanted to reduce her role on the show but Rick Berman denied her request leading to her letting the contract expire.

If you think this is "ruining Star Trek" or is Star Trek becoming "woke," you don't know Star Trek. It featured the first interracial kiss on television. Gene Roddenberry wanted to include gay characters but couldn't in TOS because he feared the series would be canceled. He intended for there to be representation in TNG but passed away. Berman took over and any form of LGBT representation became minimal or easily written off by those who would oppose it (non-binary but played by a woman, previously a heterosexual couple but now in female bodies, thematically queer episode, etc).

If you find it "sickening", I don't need to tell you why. You know why and so do we.

You don't have to like Star Trek: Lower Decks and its depiction of Garak x Bashir (from alternate universes, mind you). Not everyone likes the characters together and some prefer a friendship dynamic, there's nothing wrong with that. However, if you think that it is somehow catering to shippers or demonstrates how Star Trek has "become woke", you are simply wrong.

[uncanny-dedp00l]

The Homoerotic Imagery of the Honda Odyssey Fight in the film Deadpool and Wolverine: a comprehensive essay

The famous Honda Odyssey scene. It has gone sensational throughout fandom spaces for being a passionate fight scene between the movie's leads. Starting with an emotional monologue from Wolverine (filled with what can be taken as some projection, but that is another topic), and ending with a somewhat peace formed between the two. Of course, to most casual movie-goers watching, it was probably just another fight scene. However, to the trained fandom eye, it is much more.

The main thing that makes it more coded towards being a sex scene than merely an angry fight between buddies is the music. A good majority of the tracks in this film are love songs, and this one is no exception. Originally written for the film adaptation of *Grease*, it's about a girl transforming herself to win her love back and wanting him to "shape up" for her. This goes along with the film plot of Wolverine needing to "shape up" to help Deadpool save his world.

The other thing that leans for the sex allegory is the poses and positioning. Most obviously is where they are bent over the front of the car though the windshield, directly on top of each other. Also though is the angle where Deadpool is bent back out through the back windshield and snaps his arm back into place. There's lots of instances of being on top of each other and "exchanging bodily fluids" (in the form off blood). Somehow even more intense than being bent over the car is the small moment where Wolverine gives a small smile as blood splashes onto his face, clearly enjoying himself.

There are many who could say this is all coincidence or just queerbaiting jokes, but there are so many instances in this film of romantic subtext that at which point does it just become the main text of the film? While that is debate for another day, there is more than enough evidence for the Honda Odyssey fight to have been something more.

Finally, while the dialogue itself makes jokes about it, it's much deeper than that. The implications had to be there when writing, as there is no way this much homoeroticism can be entirely on accident. The extreme uses of sex tropes for the scene is the main reason, specifically the closing shot of the van rocking as blood sprays onto the sign saying "coexist." Deadpool and Wolverine quite certainly "coexisted" inside that car for sure. Additionally, at the very end of the film when introducing Blind Al to Dogpool, Deadpool says: "like an armadillo fucked a gremlin, angrily, in a bed of gonorrhea and didn't stop til the sun came up," which sounds a bit like what happened in the Odyssey.

[romanarose]

The Bikeriders as a metaphor for bisexuality

Now I ain't saying this was intentional because I'm pretty sure it's not but this is how I read the struggle between Johnny and Kathy for Benny just feels like Benny's internal struggle between homosexuality and heteosexuality, how neither of it fits him so he was always walking that line.

For the record Im speaking in terms of binary gender because this is just a simple movie theory. I am well aware of other genders but this is just how I see it.

Spoilers below

Kathy tried to get him to leave, he wouln't do it. It's like he wouldn't let go of that same/sex attraction, the queerness, the subversive side of him.

Johnny never tried to get him to leave Kathy for him, but his pull comes in the two times he tried to get Benny to take over the club. Benny refused, because that full commitment to the club, the lifestyle, would be rejecting the other side of him.

He didn't want to choose. he wanted to just be himself. I think his happiness came in accepting that.

Benny didnt give up riding because Kathy made him. He gave it up because Johnny was dead and that broke him. He was ready to settle down. Benny didn't choose "being straight", I think in his crying, his finally crying he and Kathy new what Johnny was to him and I think Benny accepted who he was. Then he was happy with Kathy, because he did love her. I think she was wrong that he didn't miss it. I think he did. But I think he misses it in a sense that we as people will always long for the past.

Another way I see it is that yes, he's happy. Yes he has a good life. But Maybe he was always going to end up with Kathy as the "settling down". Johnny didn't equal settling down. I think a lot of times, especially back then, homosexuality was viewed as a phase, like the trope of college girls going through a "gay phase" or concepts of homoerotic military men secluded from women. That its something you do for a while then you "grow out of it." But thats not how it really works. I stand by that Benny loves Kathy and is happy at the end.

He smiles, which is rare for his character. He's smiling when Kathy isn't looking, so he's not performing for anyone.

But I think when you look at it in the context of the time, she was the option if he wanted to settle down. That, as bisexual people, maybe you have some crazy times in college but then you find someone in a heterosexual relationship and settle and try to put that behind you. It doesn't mean he's not happy, as bisexual people in straightpassing relationships are happy. It just means, when the motercycle sounds echo for him, he still thinks about the past. the what if.

And thats just a human thing to do.

I saw The Bikeriders on Saturday and then twice, yes twice today (sunday). I was bawling at the end the last two times when the bisexual metaphore theory came to me. I read Benny as bi right away.

Johnny is said to have gotten his inspiration from Marlon Brando. Bando has talked about being bisexual. Another famous name and face of Brando's era was James Dean. Although Dean was more a car guy in the end, he was deffinetly into motercycles. Dean's sexuality is speculated but many close friends say he was bisexual.

I think it would be almost impossible not to have homoerotic subtext with this sort of thing if the movie was true to inspirations of the era. I don't know how you can watch it and think benny and Johnny dont want each other.

Personally, I don't think Johnny was bi, I think he was gay. I think because of how little emphasis on his wife there was, how she never quite seemed to get him, not in the way Benny got him, I think he was gay. I think he married and had kids because thats what you did.

Anyway all this to say I fucking love this movie. At first watch I wasn't a fan of Austin butlers performance but now I get it. Wow. I get it

I know its not anyone intention making the movie for it to be a metaphore for bisexuality but I can just see it see clearly.

This came out during pride month for a reason

[tallysgreatestfan-art]

Disabled4Disabled ships spotlight for Disability Pride Month: Tally Youngblood and Shay from Scott Westerfelds Uglies Series.

As much as I love them and as much as their stories helped me accept my own neurodivergence, I was hesitant to include them here and can only recommend Uglies with a huge caveat.

First reason: Unlike the other ships I include in this, Tally/Shay is not canon, it is just the relationship the series focuses on the most and has a fairly strong subtext.

Second reason: While the way the series portrays both Tally and Shays increasingly intense, for the lack of better words, general neurodiversity, and especially Tallys choice at the end, was groundbreaking for this time period and is even now much braver than what most novels would do – the way the series portrays their self-harming and Tallys and her boyfriend Zanes eating disorders is not good to say it friendly.

I don’t think the whole series is irredeemable, because everything else about it is just so good, but it is something you have to be aware of going in.

The issue lies not so much in the characters glorifying both as ways to escape their dystopian brainwashing, dystopias are famous for unreliable narrators, but that the disconnect between them doing this and the narrative and the author knowing that this is not a healthy way to deal with this is not better established.

It is also described not just fairly explicit, but also in a way that made readers who actually dealt with these issues feel alienated, since the self-harm is first described in a fairly antagonistic cult-like clique, and Tally and Zanes clique amicably mock them for loosing weight and becoming bony and haggard.

Why was this still so healing for me as a queer autistic woman with bipolar disorder?

Close to every book says that being different is okay and you should not conform to societal ideals. Uglies actually shows how insidious societal expectations are, how you still believe them even when they harm you, and how much it hurts to be lonely and different. With Uglies, you can believe it when it says being different (neurodivergent, queer) is okay, because it feels like it understands how hard it is.

In the first book, their neurodivergence is only hinted at, if anything. Tally doesn’t has many friends and all of them already were made into the older societal caste aka Pretties. She is lonely, and she desperately wants to be like them too, normal, how she should be. She meets Shay, who doesn’t fit in either, but takes the opposite route, rebelling against the system and being just so angry. It feels like the two extremes neurodivergent people can deal with their differences.

Their friendship made me feel so seen. It was deep and close, but also so jealous and it becomes increasingly more toxic and complex, as their dystopian system pushes them against each other again and again. It felt like all these messed up, failed female friendships I had. Even with how homoerotic it is, but both of them are too trapped in their other relationships and their past to ever act on it.

In the second book, without spoilering too much, their neurodivergent behaviors become so much more clear and also self-destructive due to the golden-cage like environment they find themselves in.

And in the third book, it is explicitly mentioned that the way their brains work is very different from the norm in a mental illness way. Even if, spoilers for the rest of this paragraph, their neurodivergence is artificially altered to make them more effective (read: self-destructive) super soldiers. As their allies come up with a way to undo this, Shay choses to do it. But Tally refuses. This blew my mind as a teen. That you could actually see your neurodivergence as a part of yourself. Even if it’s seen as bad, or destructive, or inconvenient for yourself and others.

There also is a third disabled character, Tallys boyfriend Zane, who already from the first time we meet him has an eating disorder, and also later acquires brain damage that causes him problems with motor skills. Tally at this point is horrible ableist to him about the physical disability, being programmed to by her dystopian society, but both her and the narrative also very firmly know that this is bigoted and something she needs to overcome. It is uncomfortable and harrowing and tragic to watch, but IMO it is respectful even if the characters are not.

Ultimately, it depends on what you search for if this would be a good read for you. Are you searching for accurate, healing self-harm and eating disorder representation? Then this is absolutely the wrong book. Are you searching for a touching, thought-provoking story about beauty culture, societal pressure and human nature, told through the toxic friendship between two teenage girls in a dystopian society? Then I can only recommend it.

A movie of the first book will come out 13.September this year on Netflix, hope it’s as good as the book. Sadly, in the book racially ambiguous Tally is white in it though, but Shay stays a WOC.

[ripplestitchskein]

Sorry for yet another, “Listen guys, it could be so much worse, my fandom related trauma has made me appreciate scraps. My personal bar is literally on the floor” posts but I am genuinely happy with the MHA ending. I get why people are not though. Audiences want finality. They want commitment. They want closure and resolution.

But considering the genre of MHA, the common tropes of the medium, the cultural and capitalistic concerns at play… MHA did a lot. Shonen Jump was never going to go for a canonically queer ship in their biggest property my guys, they just weren’t. So bearing that in mind, that it was never going to be explicit, your alternatives are ambiguity, punishment by the narrative via permanent character death, or canon surprise heterosexuality ala Naruto.

I’m gonna take ambiguous “fic can make this better” endings over permanent character death or like a Deathly Hallows epilogue any day. I’m certainly going to take it over “Yeah they were hella gay the whole time but here is the wife they barely had any interaction with and their 2.5 children that prove they fucked at least once.” Like yeah obviously explicit canon scenes are always gonna be better and more satisfying but the absence of them in any one direction, the ambiguity that is left to individual interpretation, especially in this genre of manga, is honestly a huge win for me personally. That HK went out of his way to not canonize Izuku/Ochako and to highlight Bakugou’s contribution especially and have him be the hand that brings Deku back to being a hero speaks very loudly. HK is not unaware of the popularity of the ship and a creator who has thier hands tied by thier distributor making the decision to not explicitly kill it IS a win. He could have very easily done the “I assure you this fruity little gremlin is straight. Look at his girlfriend! She has huge tits! Yes he sure does love women! Yessiree, ignore all the homoerotic subtext and the like yearning and weird focus on hands, and like being willing to literally die for his also very straight counterpart.”

The move when a content distributor wants to squash a ship is doubling down not “What if we left it kinda vague but heavily implied it?”

And it is such a good ambiguity. Enough detail to world build but not to preclude headcanons. And the fic possibilities jfc.

Like, the angst potential of Izuku thinking he got left behind because Bakugou and everyone else was working to make his dreams a reality will launch a thousand fics. Bakugou working tirelessly to make that dream a reality? Keeping himself away from Izuku to raise himself in the ranks and financially to buy this dream, no distractions but missing his partner. You can feast for years on an 8 year jump with patchy communication. and what comes after, the awkward relearning each other and catching up, the will they won’t they now that they are working together again. Omg.

I’m just saying the “And everyone did a cool thing related to their character arcs but the specifics of their interpersonal relationships is up to you to fill in, The End” finale is loads better than the alternatives imo and really suited the story overall.

[catras-breakup-song]

Soo hope your not bothered by this ask, if you are you can ignore it

Your take on catra "sexually harassing" adora in the dance between them scene by the antis?

Also your take on the antis saying catra used hurtful mind control on adora (in episode: white out) just like prime's own mind control abilities?

hang on for a bit while i process...

WHAT IN THE WORLD ???

i can at least understand the controversial argument that catra was abusive because... well, she was. she perpetuated the cycle (that only goes up to S2 but it gets the point across). as adora said, she hurt a lot of people before becoming a better person and improving her relationships.

but i cannot for the life of myself fucking get behind sexual assault accusations... are they serious?! that just comes across as lesbophobia at such a point. the only moment i can assume they're talking about is this one:

and that is adora's leg placement, her own doing. adora's body was supported from falling flat on the floor not because she lifted her leg up, but because catra's arms were held around her back. literally just search up on google "prom dip pose" and under the images section you'll find the partner kicking their leg up like that. alternatively, if adora hadn't done that and simply leaned back without lifting anything, the posture still would've been the same.

not to mention, adora later does practically the same thing anyway:

i hate how people pretend like there wasn't mutual desire between catradora as if their impulsive fights and angry tussles weren't homoerotic as hell, and not just on catra's end being the one to initiate them. the audience is hooked on the coding within their subtext for a damn good reason. for the record, someone wrote a super long essay about how their sexual desire for each other was written, including this exact scene from princess prom.

EDIT: this post is perfect specifically for adora’s role in their song-and-dance there!

as for the other part about the first ones' tech virus, i covered it briefly on another blog after an anti commented on my post, which i'd rather not link so i'll paraphrase and add on:

it's strange that this moment was focused on specifically when it was so brief and didn't seem to affect adora herself (seeing as the second the sword was detached from her hand she detransitioned) aside from passing out for a little while but otherwise being totally fine, let alone in the long run. even then though, i genuinely wonder if it was more from the freezing cold considering she didn't bring any winter wear due to planning on staying as she-ra the entire time, or even exhaustion from chasing after targets ─ then again though, i wouldn't be surprised if it was just the corruption since catra didn't have any trouble recovering from being half-erased and splitting reality apart herself. i would imagine regardless, she-ra is much more immune to physical weaknesses & obstacles, compared to the wielder. the point is, either way, it clearly wasn't traumatizing the way prime's chip was shown to affect catra even many episodes after STC. for example, she continued to rub the back of her neck in "an ill wind", which was five episodes after.

the disk, however, never needed to be brought up again, but if it had been, it'd be unfair to say long-lasting consequences were entirely to blame on catra when the exact same thing had happened in dryll where she hadn't been present. the only real difference was that catra, knowing what could happen (not would obviously, as she hadn't planned to be put in the spotlight like that), fully intended to destroy she-ra unless she could weaponize it (but notably not adora in her default state), which i can't defend her for. it was a malicious choice, but it's reasonable to say it wasn't out-of-order while they were active enemies. at least she ended up realizing she was paying the price by being nearly killed, as she had been so used to adora going easy on her before the events of the portal-opening took place.

[marble-running]

okay hopefully this will not break your inbox this time so long as i don't send 30 images again

Yuri #1 - Anhane

very yuriful. their first (indirect) meeting is when kohane sees an performing, and wishes she could be as confident and passionate as her. this is actually what unlocks their sekai (vbs has some fate shit going on long story) and they get isekai'd into it although they don't remember that or meeting each other. kohane gets lost and ends up in an's dad's cafe some time later, and thinks an is really cool, but she runs out as soon as an starts talking to her. she comes back a week later because an's performance left such an impression on her, and they talk for a bit, then sing together, and an decides kohane is the one for her, so they become partners. i won't spoil the entire main story for you lol so i'll leave it there.

anyway over the course of the game (not in much depth) kohane starts to pick up skill very quickly. she's very naturally talented, moreso than an. once kohane starts getting mentored, an begins to worry that kohane will get too good for her, and leave her behind as a partner. kohane is unaware of all this and herself has some concerns that she's not as confident or impressive as An, though this isn't as much of a problem as an's abandonment issues. anyway they do work things out in the event the vampire yuri card is from.

for some other stuff. kohane is implied lesbian, she's very attracted to an in the second wedding event, and shows attraction to other girls too (mainly haruka). an is also implied lesbian, and her card story for the anhane/minoharu date night event suggests that she's like. legitimately dating kohane. a later card story suggests this too. haruka says that this is the first time an has ever acted like this with anyone, and the way an's parents act around kohane is almost as if she's an's girlfriend.

Yuri #2 - Minoharu

^ moment that is very important to me they're actually my favourite ship in the game. haruka is the one who inspired minori to be an idol, and she has been a huge fan of her for years. however when she meets haruka in person only to learn she quit being an idol, she decides she has to bring back the haruka she's always looked up to. haruka helps out minori with some training and advice here and there, but still doesn't go back to being an idol. it's only once minori finds out what caused haruka to quit, resolves it, and then puts on a show for her does she convince her to become an idol again. basically minori is able to remind her of why she loves performing so much, she just needed to see this person who she impacted so is so endlessless positive and full of love and passion. minori also reminds haruka of the person she looked up to and got her to be an idol but that's important later and i could go on about it for a long time but i think your askbox has a word limit.

minori is also like. very explicitly in love with haruka. not just like a celebrity crush like she's legit crushing on haruka really badly. there's just SO MUCH of it please check the tvtropes homoerotic subtext page for proseka i spent ages on the minoharu folder when i was 16. oh yeah also implied lesbian, though i tend to just assume its canon for her (and an/kohane/saki). it's implied that haruka reciprocates minori's crush to some degree but she's a bit dense sometimes.

Yuri #3 - Shizuai

first off i am still not over this card. okay so airi and shizuku first met when shizuku was new to the industry. shizuku was upset that she was a burden to the other girls in her unit due to being an amateur who didn't even intend to become an idol (some friends signed her up without her knowledge but she attended the auditions and passed). she was starting to cry, so airi gave her a towel to clean up with. this towel is shizuku's bonus item for gameplay purposes.

however, airi also harboured some jealousy at shizuku over time, since shizuku kept getting promoted and was incredibly popular and got lots of opportunities, whilst she essentially became a tv star instead of an idol. when shizuku quits because she wasn't enjoying being an idol anymore, airi lashes out at her. however this is resolved pretty quickly, and they both decide to become idols again for eah other, since they are each others' idol.

they're like. very clearly in love with each other. airi is attracted to shizuku and bought all the magazines she did photoshoots in and compares shizuku to a swan etc etc but shizuku says some REALLY gay shit sometimes like she has this whole monologue about airi's hands in airi's 3rd event and the card above is her returning a "magic spell" gesture airi did for her years ago. also i showed you the romeo and cinderella 3dmv so you get the idea.

Yuri #4 - Emunene

they are very important to me. emu is super friendly and affectionate with just about everyone. nene is her total opposite - shy and has a sharp tongue. there's multiple times early game however where rui (#1 emunene supporter) points out how nene has started acting differently around emu, she's smiling and laughing more, and is the only person she won't leave on read. in emu's first event nene wants to cheer emu up when she's sad, specifically saying that she wants to see emu's smile again. they become a lot closer over the course of the game, and nene's standoffish attitude around emu and slight annoyance at her going on outings with her completely disappear. they regularly go to each others' houses to watch movies or play video games or go shopping together now. they have an event where they enter a gaming contest together which is where this card is from. nene is also the first one to comfort emu when wxs is at risk of breaking up.

in emu's third event the vocaloids list off emu's favourite things as all being activities she does with emu, with luka going as far as to say that emu loves nene. nene gets flustered and tells them they're just regular activities for them. anyway they got "very good friends"d in the official english translation so you know they're gay. also it's loosely implied that they both like girls. they are very cute and very gay and emu clings onto nene in one area conversation to the point nene is blushing and then they share parfaits together and also got one together ON WHITE DAY.

yuri #5 - polyneed

DO NOT SEPARATE. theyre so devoted to each other it's actually sickening. okay so. they've been friends since elementary school, and then decide to form a band because ichika wanted to play some miku songs. when they're walking home one day there's a meteor shower, and decide to keep playing in the band and spending time together forever. ichika has like a baby gay realisation that she wants to be with them forever here and it's what causes their sekai to form. this yearning shit gets serious. anyway as they get older saki is moved to a faraway hospital, shiho cuts them off because she doesn't want her reputation affecting them, and honami cuts them off because she doesn't want to be bullied. when saki gets out of hospital she decides to get the band back together, and this is the plot of the main story.

anyway post main story the gay yearning shit gets serious. so shiho wants to go pro but the rest are pretty casual about the band. shiho is offered to play for a different group, but leoneed are willing to uproot their lives to stay with shiho. shiho also realises that leoneed is the only band for her. the gacha for that event is called 4=1. the event song is called one and starts as 3/4 time but switches to 4/4 time. the card above is from this set. it's all very domestic and happy leoneed life together forever. oh and then in the ichika event that just ran on en last month they reaffirm their promise under the stars. its shakespearean the star motifs here. okay so their recent world link event was insane. i need to waffle. they have this magic flying subway train in their sekai now. and it won't open. but then it opens for shiho but she won't board it until the others are there. because she only wants to go for her dreams if they're by her side. and then at the end of the event they all ride the train together. what the hell.

okay so saki's like. very implied lesbian. there's several indicators that she's into girls. tbh everyone in this game likes the same gender it's a japanese idol mobage they're all gay. fanservice or something. anyway is there a polycule implied in the funny miku taptap game.... i dunno? considering the industry, no, considering honami's self intro where she "sounds like she's confessing to them" and causes them all to blush, maybe. maybe the leoneed writers room is bad at writing friendship and thinks this is "girls hanging out" when it's actually "sapphic yearning off the scale". honami is also ship teased with another girl but i'm not going to put that in this already. ahem. very long ask.

Yuri #6 - Mizuena

okay now here's complex yuri. kanamafu is more yuri than them but alas i am not as invested in them and this ask is also a free pass for me to talk about my favourite prsk ships (minus the two yaois) and brainwash you with my agenda. okay so i've already explained the deal with mizuki and ena on that massive google doc i sent you. so despite their teasing, mizuki really does appreciate ena, and she thinks she's talented and values her art. while kanade is actually the one who saw true worth in ena and her art, mizuki still is supportive of ena.

ena->mizuki is about trust. ena sees that something is troubling mizuki. there's something on mizuki's mind and they won't spit it out. ena wants to know, she's not the most patient person alive, but she decides not to pressure mizuki and tells her she'll wait as long as she has to. but although ena puts her full trust in mizuki, they lie to her and tell her that they'll tell her eventually when they don't plan on it at all, still scared of what will happen when ena knows, and scared of losing ena (and n25), who they didn't even realise viewed them as a true friend until she said it in that moment. mizuki's second event still tears me up to this day it's definitely worth the read and i'm very excited for the anticipated mizuki comes out event in october.

oh yeah also it's implied they both like girls. you already know the deal with mizuki i used they/them here for the most part just out of clarity.

anyway those are my top 6 project sekai yuris. not in order i have all of them ranked equally except minoharu because some ships are more equal than others. if you have any other questions about project sekai shipping please ask me in my askbox or dms i need you to get invested in this game enough so i can ramble and you can comprehend it lmao

[ufonaut]

Green Lantern (1990) #55 || Underworld Unleashed: Abyss - Hell's Sentinel (1995) #1

I've often written about Alan Scott's Golden Age gaycoding, how he reads as gay from his earliest appearances, how his 1940s appearances are a treasure trove of subtext -- but there's no denying Alan's Sentinel era plays an equally pivotal role in the portrayal of his (once implied, now confirmed) sexuality over the course of his many years of publication.

The 1990s were a decade of change for Alan Scott. With his storyline in Green Lantern Corps Quarterly (1993), he'd regained his youth but consequently found himself rejected by his friends in the JSA, by his wife (it's here that Molly would start questioning the reality of their marriage), and brimming with anger. He'd soon take up the moniker of Sentinel to differentiate himself from the last Green Lantern still standing and he'd end up haunted by the deaths of his friends during Zero Hour: Crisis in Time (1994), soon fighting accusations of not being a 'real man' for having outlived them (as per Showcase 1995 #1).

Anger was the main driving force behind Sentinel but Alan Scott had always been an angry man, the most remarkable aspect of this era was a sudden sense of boldness -- an almost transgressive one, at that -- that Alan had never carried himself with before. In many ways, being young again had brought back his confidence (many might recall the "young man's body with a young man's needs" line from the aforementioned GLCQ arc) but it had also brought back the homoeroticism of those very early stories with a much sharper, much more tangible edge in what was in many ways a more permissive landscape. Alan's interactions with the personification of Chaos (shown as male but dressed in drag) in The Book of Fate (1997) #2 are a good example of the way Alan had carried himself throughout the '90s.

However, and more to the point of this little segue, the gaycoding of the Sentinel era is fundamentally legitimized by one simple fact: it wasn't just gay audiences who were catching on to what was going on with Alan Scott (and had been for a long time), it was gay creators as well.

The above images are undoubtedly homoerotic, the fact that they were drawn by gay artists Craig Hamilton and Phil Jimenez respectively only underlines this undeniable aspect. Both in and out of universe, it's a striking portrayal of gay sexuality that is simply not seen in today's sanitized gay stories -- no matter how explicit of a confirmation we get nowadays, it's nothing close to what had gone unsaid a few decades ago.

[13eyond13]

23 + 25 for GriffGuts!

Omg thank you @ofdemonsandangels !! I'm v excited to get Berserk asks ♥︎

I'm not sure if the request is for the individual characters or just the ship or both, so I'm going to cover all my bases and answer for ALL THREE.

GUTS + favourite picture of them:

First thing that came to mind was his sword + moon pose! I just feel v fond of and oddly protective of and affectionate of him when I look at it. I just love when he's being all pensieve and secretly sentimental about stuff by himself...

GRIFFITH + favourite picture of them:

Hmmm. There's just something about the way Griffith's drawn in the later part of the Golden Age that I like the most. Def the biggest fan of his design when he looks like this:

His scary blazing eyes during the second swordfight in the snow really stuck in my head, and are some of the first panels I picture whenever I'm picturing Griffy!

GRIFFGUTS + favourite picture of them:

This fanart is pretty fantastic... if I didn't already know the pairing and saw it I'd probably be like damn, this looks compelling, who is that? 👀

https://www.tumblr.com/13eyond13/742518174586748928?source=share

BUT also so is this fanart (got those scary blazing Griffith eyes down perfect, and also ahhh the wings and the scratches on Guts' back!!)

--

GUTS + what was your first impression of this character? How about now?

I first started reading Berserk at the end of 2023 without knowing much of anything about it other than it had a character named Guts with a huge sword, that some fans shipped him with a character named Griffith, and I had heard that the art style was apparently pretty amazing and crazy as well. I fully did not expect to like Guts that much or relate to him that much going into things, and assumed he'd be a super boring edgy hyper-violent macho 80s meathead muscleman without much personality. And upon reading the first few chapters I certainly wasn't feeling extremely fond of him yet (especially during stuff like the very opening scene where he's banging some demon lady and then killing her, which once you actually get to know him is like one of the most odd and out-of-character things for him to do, and I think shows Miura hadn't really figured Guts as a character out totally yet). It actually didn't take THAT long for me to realize that there was more to him than that and to warm up to him a lot, though. Even partway through the Black Swordsman Arc I feel he started intriguing me with some of the more unexpected stuff he was doing and the mysterious hints about whatever had taken place in his past that was currently haunting him so much. And certainly by the time you start seeing his childhood memories and the Golden Age and getting to know why he is the way he is I was feeling very attached to him and invested in him emotionally! He's by far my fave of the bunch, and he just feels very much like a living breathing being to me in canon much of the time. One of my all-time fave characters now.

GRIFFITH + what was your first impression of this character? How about now?

I knew basically nothing about Griffith going into things initially. He came off pretty goofy as Femto to me initially, so at the start of the Golden Age I remember just being like, omg so how does this pretty femboy guy become that weird bitchy Batman in the labyrinth that Guts ends up hating so much? 😅 I also did not expect him to be so outright gay for Guts as he is in the manga, and had previously assumed the fandom's shipping of these two was probably based mostly on your typical barely there homoerotic subtext or whatever. Very surprised to find there was just so much blatantly going on there in the text and that it was basically directly discussed by the characters and almost written like a straight-up romance, and all of this stuff seemed very intentional and deliberate on Miura's part to me too. I remember especially being impressed by how bold Griffith was about just straight-up announcing his interest in/attraction to Guts to his face (and how much Guts actually seemed to be into him back too, even if he's a bit slower and more shy and furtive about it – which to me is much more unusual than having a queer-coded villain guy expressing obsessive interest in the male protagonist – he usually isn't also equally interested back like that!). I think Griffith is at his most interesting to me during those early parts when he's being very upfront about his emotions with other characters and a bit vulnerable like that, especially because we spend so much of the rest of the story only ever seeing him from a very guarded and emotionally closed-off dead-inside sort of distance as a character. He maybe isn't my favourite because I don't relate to his personality that much, and sometimes his ethereal otherworldliness and mysteriousness made it harder for him to feel as real to me as the others do – Guts and Casca often felt a bit more human and down-to-earth and easier to emotionally attach myself to and to know things about for sure, so I found myself caring about those two the most whenever I was reading it. And then of course there was a long stretch of the story there where Griffith genuinely shocked and appalled me with what he did to everyone (I had zero spoilers for what was actually going to happen during the Eclipse and did not expect it to be anything nearly as bad as what happened lol). At times I really loathed him and got super angry at him as a character, but I also appreciated that he drew such strong emotional reactions from me and was always making the most interesting things in the plot that I actually care about happen, too. Whenever I was super mad at him I would be furious every time he showed up and did literally anything onscreen, yet also would get so frustrated and bored and antsy whenever he would disappear for hundreds of chapters at a time, too 😅 I feel like that made it much easier to understand why he drove Guts so crazy, because I was being driven a bit crazy by him too... Can't live with him and can't live without him! I remember finding Guts the most interesting character in canon when I was actually reading the story, but I find that Griffith is the most fun one to think and talk and speculate about with the other people in the fandom after the fact. I appreciate him a lot now as an interesting character and an antagonist, but he isn't exactly a beloved blorbo to me the way Guts is so much as he is the guy I like to rotate on a spit in my mind and listen to other fans talk about and to contemplate the most, maybe?

GRIFFGUTS + what was your first impression of this ship? How about now?

All I knew is that a few of my DN mutuals who I think have good taste liked the ship, which made me mildly interested to see what I thought about it myself going in, though I didn't really expect to be that into it myself. Then I was taken aback by how strongly the story seemed to be actually based around the relationship between these two and how actually gay it was between them both, haha. I was conflicted a bit about it and whether or not I actually cared to ship it as I was reading it, particularly because of the grosser stuff that Griffith does during the Eclipse really putting me off him for a good chunk of time. But I think after I finished the manga and sat chewing on it a bit longer I kept wondering how the story might have changed if those two had been able to communicate a little better with each other and make some different choices and have some important realizations pre-Eclipse. It's one of my absolute fave tropes as well, the codependent besties that maybe actually both secretly have feelings for each other that then turn into enemies, when you can also see that maybe they probably actually could've easily turned into lovers instead. And I just feel like at the end of the day even though it's clearly never going to be a happily ever after or whatever at this point that I think they both still kinda love each other too, whether or not they admit it or whether anybody approves lol. It's one of those ships that to me is just like, why do I ship them? IDK bro, because they ship themselves... ask THEM why they're still into each other even now and even despite everything... I feel like I'm just simply sitting here listening to what they're saying and picking up what they're putting down lol

[character ask meme]

[homoeroticbetrayal]

Iconic Homoerotic Betrayal: Round 2

Round 2 Directory

Context:

Griffith/Guts

Summarized by Anonymous Contributor

Griffith was the leader of the band of the hawk, a mercenary group. His goal was to some day have his own castle, and to do so he needed loyal followers. His most loyal followers eventually ended up being guts. Guts entered the band of the hawk after losing a duel with Griffith (that's where the "you're mine" image comes from).

Griffith's ultimate goal was to get his castle, but he quickly formed a bond with guts that would go on to form whole archetypes for homoerotic subtext. Guts would eventually be so inspired by Griffith's dream that he would leave the band after years to try to find a goal to espire to himself. This being spurred by Griffith saying that he doesn't view those working for him as friends, as a true friend would be an equal to him, someone who's also striving for a lofty goal. In order to leave guts had to beat Griffith in a duel, which had never happened before, but his want for Griffith to see him as a true friend let guts beat him and leave the band of the hawk, sending Griffith into a spiral of shock and anger and depression.

When guts returned to the band of the hawk after finding his dream, he discovered that Griffith's dream, which seemed all but accomplished when he left, had fallen apart. Not only was he never getting his castle, but he had been locked deep in a dungeon and brutally tortured for a long time. Apon hearing this news, guts rushed to Griffith's rescue, who had been reduced to a shell of his former self due to brutalization and malnutrition he had insured for so long. But guts and the rest of the band of the hawk didn't care. They decided to set out yet again on achieving Griffith's dream. And they slowly started nursing him back to health until one day Griffith gave up on his dream. Seeing how feeble he has become and how much he needed to rely on others now utterly defeated him and he attempted to take his own life, but right before that he was approached by the god hand.

God's who rule over countless demons and monsters who are looking for their final member to complete them. Griffith's determination beckoned them, and they gave him an ultimatum: Become reborn as a god by sacrificing all your men, or don't. Obviously the ever ambitious Griffith betrays the band of the hawk and becomes Femto, the final member of the god hand, and kick starts the apocalypse by letting all his comrades get eaten alive by demons, including guts, obviously. Especially guts.

Thanks to a talking skeleton, though, guts just barely escaped with his live after witnessing true horror and experiencing great pain and suffering. And that's just the prologue of Berserk, the rest of the series is just guts angerly screaming Griffith's name. Many betrayals in this tournament can claim tragedy, but were they a betrayal of such great magnitude? Did the betrayal end in the death of everyone the protagonist ever cared for and the antagonist ascending to godhood?

Anthy/Utena

Summarized by Anonymous Contributor

THE blueprint for homoerotic betrayals of the canonically gay (as opposed to interpretive, certainly there are older iconic examples for that) variety. listed as #2 in the infamous top ten anime betrayals video, iirc.

it is about akio pushing anthy to utena. it is about utena’s protective stance, misunderstanding. most of all, it is about anthy kissing utena’s shoulder before stabbing her.

the story has been leading us to this the whole time — utena assuming once again the protective princely position; akio, always playing divide and conquer, unable to manipulate utena to betray anthy, now reliant on anthy betraying utena; the game being rigged from the start, true victory impossible (for the duelists, who will always lose the game proper to akio, the rule maker, in one way or another; for akio himself, just as obviously); utena’s love for anthy within the princely stance; anthy’s love for utena and anthy’s fear (of the world beyond; of utena loving her truly; of utena not loving her truly but just projecting onto her still as any prince does, and turning out to be the same (as akio) in the end) and akio (framing himself) as the only one who will love her no matter what because friends turn away from you and only connections by blood are forever, the two of them are the only ones who’s real in this projected world, so on and so forth, and anthy’s bitterness towards utena (“do you know, utena-sama, how i always despised you” from that one “in the next episode” bit) and her princeliness and her being not that impossibly unlike akio (all princes are the same). everything has lead us to this moment. and yet we are shocked.

personally, i’ve never moved on from how she kisses her shoulder.

See a whole dissertation on Utenanthy here

[bthump]

this has probably been asked here before but how likely do you think it is that the author actually truly intended for Griffith and guts relationship to be romantic? How likely do you think it is we’ll get a blatant confirmation (eg a confession of love beyond being friends or even a tragic kiss) and if it does happen do you think it’s likely we’ll get an explicit confirmation on both of their ends so we know the feeling is reciprocated (because I know guts feelings can be underestimated sometimes compared to griffiths). Likelihood as a percentage or on a scale from one to ten lol. I think it’s already pretty obvious enough for me to be satisfied whatever happens but it would be nice if there was an undeniable proof of mutual romantic love. because I think no matter what happens if it’s anything less than spelling it out word for word people would still make attempts to deny their feelings which is kind of sad to me. But I could be wrong of course and romance wasn’t intended by the author. Either way I want them to reveal their feelings for each other whether platonic or romantic.

I'm cynical, so I feel like the odds of something textually romantic happening are like, 2/10 at best. Might've gone up to 3/10 if Miura was stlil alive since it's getting more and more common to confirm gay subtext and that might've influenced him, but since it's being written now by someone determined to adhere to the plans Miura told him, whatever happens is frozen in amber circa Miura and Mori's last conversation, with no room to evolve.

That's all pretty much a moot point anyway because again, I think the odds were always gonna be pretty miniscule anyway.

That said, I think the odds that Miura intended the gay subtext are like 9.5/10 lol. I think the romantic undertones are almost certainly deliberate.

I guess I just don't think it necessarily follows that the point of the subtext was ever to eventually become text. I think it was probably there for a lot of potential other reasons: to add a sense of depth and complexity to their relationship; to add more chemistry; potentially to appeal to women; to suggest that their relationship had the potential for romance that will never be realized therefore making their relationship even more all-encompassing and adding to the tragedy; serving the theme of childhood trauma fucking up your relationships; etc.

Of course I'd be overjoyed if it was acknowledged eventually, and I think the story would ultimately be better for it, like I'm not gonna say it's ~deeper~ if it stays subtext lol. But I think that considering the main target audience for Berserk is horny straight dudes, and while it's getting more common it's still very rare to have textual gay romances between two leads, and almost unheard of in legacy media properties, I just don't think the odds are in griffguts' favour.

Oh, though I do want to add that I'd say the odds of getting an acknowledgement of intense feelings between them post-eclipse is very high. I don't think it'd likely be a romantic confession, but yeah I think it seems very likely that Griffith and Guts are going to acknowledge the intense emotional hold they still have over each other. And if that happens I'll be happy even if it's not textually romantic. I'm sure it'll at least be homoerotic enough for me lol.

Thanks for the ask!

[noahsbookhoard]

📚November 2024 Book Review📚

November was a bit less busy that October and varies from jawdropping to very meh.

Everyone In My Family Has Killed Someone (Ernest Cunningham #1) by Benjamin Stevenson

That one is definitely in the jawdropping category. A great murder mystery in which you have all the keys and the author is right there telling you to "go ahead and solve it". I didn't. I had fun anyway. Just as darkly funny as the title announces.

Wintersmith (Discworld #34) by Terry Pratchett

I think sofar it is my favorite Tifanny Aching story: she is growing up and that shows, she is more responsible, she owns up to what she does wrong, she is still whip smart and I never get tired of the Nac Mac Feegle.

Dracula by Bram Stoker

This count as a novel read since I completed Dracula Daily like everyone on nov 8. The audio drama version by Bloody FM production is so good and a great plus because some of Van Helsing lecture at John are really just too long.

Une belle vie by Virginie Grimaldi

I don't know why but I ended up reading 3 Grimaldi in as many months, maybe because they are rather easy to read, funny and generally have a hopeful vives even when dealing with heavy themes. This one is the story of two estranged sister who reconnect by coming for one last vacation in their grand mother house before they sell it. They rebuilt their relationship and draw back childhood memories, some good and some bad. The part where I got confused is that the author tries to tackle a lot of subjects (bipolarity, depression, domestic violence and cancer are the ones I remember but there are many) instead of just one are two. It was a lot to handle at times but a good read nonetheless.

The Restaurang at the End of the Universe (Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy #2) by Douglas Adams

Book 2 is just as crazy as The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, but I found it a little more coherent, as in I knew approximately where we were going (a restaurant) and the convoluted adventure that leads to and from it made more sense to me than in book 1. I'm really excited for the rest of the series.

L'amant by Marguerite Duras

I admit, I don't see the appeal. The writing is good but not incredibly so. The story itself is rambling, I guess it was intentional but it makes it harder to follow. The relationship between the author as a girl and her lover at least 10 years older is very disturbing when judge by modern standards and I was a little put off by the casual way she talks about her brother's death. I must have missed the literary qualities here but I might try another of her novel later on.

La Dame du manoir de Wildfell Hall (The Tenant of Wildfell Hall) by Anne Brontë

I felt so much fucking rage reading this novel! It has some of the most heinous male characters I have ever read and even the main love interest has a hell of a journey to stop being an entitled jealous violent piece of shit. That said it is very well written otherwise I would have either given up or thrown the whole thing through the window. Helen, the main character is strong minded and brave, I loved her from the start and grew even warmer. I strongly recommend it.

Tw for domestic abuse and alcoholism.

The Sword Catcher (Chronicles of Castelane #1) by Cassandra Clare

This was an indulgence: I said I wanted to read less traditional medieval heroic fantasy and it falls right into it. It is good tho! I liked the concept of the Sword Catcher and the Ragpicker King amd especially how the two characters interact. I really hope the relationship between Connor and Kel is explored more too in the future books because the homoerotic subtext deserve to be more text than that!

Somewhere Beyond the Sea (Cerulean #2) T J Klune

I loved The House in the Cerulean Sea so I was excited for the sequel, but a little weary too. I was afraid not to find what made book 1 so dear to me. But there it was! The kids and their shenanigans, Arthur and Linus being their lovey dovey selves, Zoey and Helen are all the village had kept its newly opened mind from the end of book 1 and that was very comforting. The story is hard, the hate and fear they face hits a little too close. But they overcome it and everything ends well which is just what I wanted to read.

The kids calling Arthur and Linus Dad and Papa was extremely cute. I really loved David and how he bonded with Lucy. Not a comfort book as much as the first one but I had a great time reading it

My Roommate is a Vampire by Jenna Levine

I stumbled upon this one because I watched this video of a person who read all the Rylo fanfic turned novels out of morbid curiosity and this one seemed intriguing enough for me to try, open mind and all that. I was promised some whimsy, a shopping montage and a heist.

Well there's comedy (an kumquats for some reason) The shopping montage wasn't much of a montage, they just went and tried t-shirts on. But the end was just stupid: female lead went ahead with a plan she deems stupid and unlikely to work, us reader with even the tiniest bit of social media experience know that the plan is stupid and can't possibly work. And it works. Just genuinely first degree work. When you go with that in a comedy setting at least make your stupid plan work in a funny way, WWDITS style! Some bits are tedious, I understand your 400 year old don't know how to use Instagram but I do and I don't need a full chapter of tutorial (same chapter as my newest fight with my nemesis, the possessiveness trope, you don't get to storm off and brood just cause she posted bikini pics dude!)

Overall it was quite fun if you don't think to much about it.

When Among Crows by Veronica Roth

I listen to the audio book and the accents were *chef kiss*: it is a novella with slavic folklore creatures in an modern setting and I wasn't expecting to love it so much!! It's a story about monsters and family and duty. Angsty, a bit gay, the characters relationship work very well. It will be a reread in the future.Greatest of news for me today! I discovered by googling the spelling of characters names that a second book is coming this year!

[electronickingdomfox]

TOS season 3: subtext becomes text (part 2)

Continuation from this other post: https://www.tumblr.com/electronickingdomfox/705554052352770048/tos-season-3-subtext-becomes-text-part-1

Plato’s Stepchildren

This episode is kinky, in general, though I don’t think there’s much K/S in it. It contains, however, the first appearance of Shakepeare’s homoerotic sonnets in relation to Kirk. He’s forced to recite Sonnet LVII while crawling on the floor towards the Platonian lord: Parmen.

The sonnet in question deals with the poet’s “slavery” under the love demands of a younger man. This is the full text (Kirk only recites up to fourth line, before being interrupted by McCoy):

Being your slave, what should I do but tend Upon the hours and times of your desire? I have no precious time at all to spend, Nor services to do, till you require. Nor dare I chide the world-without-end hour Whilst I, my sovereign, watch the clock for you. Nor think the bitterness of absence sour When you have bid your servant once adieu; Nor dare I question with my jealous thought Where you may be, or your affairs suppose, But like a sad slave, stay and think of nought, Save, where you are how happy you make those. So true a fool is love that in your will Though you do anything, he thinks no ill.

The sonnet was probably chosen because of its relation to slavery. But it’s an interesting choice nonetheless...

Wink of an Eye

Yet another episode in which Kirk is forced into a relationship with a woman, or isn’t really able to consent. I read somewhere that Fred Freiberger, producer of season 3 in place of Roddenberry, wanted more romance in the series. Though I can’t locate the exact source, so take it with a grain of salt. But anyway, there’s indeed quite a lot of love stories here, for several characters: Chekov (Spectre of the Gun), McCoy ( For the World Is Hollow and I Have Touched the Sky), Scotty (The Lights of Zetar) and even a brief scene for Spock in The Cloud Minders (I’m not counting episodes in which Spock was just acting, or not being truly himself). For some of these characters, it’d be the first time they have a genuine romance in the series.

Did this mean more female love interests for Kirk as well? You know, since he’s supposed to be “space Casanova” according to some fans? Well, not really. There’s Rayna, of course. But season 1 alone had both Ruth and Edith. What happened instead was a dramatic increase of episodes in which Kirk is forced, or otherwise manipulated, into a relationship with a woman. So far, we’ve seen a marriage while under amnesia in The Paradise Syndrome, a forced kiss in Plato’s Stepchildren, and now a kidnapping in this episode. And we’re not even done yet: there’s still the love potion of Elaan of Troyius, Marta’s assault in Whom Gods Destroy, and a semi-forced situation in The Mark of Gideon.  To compare, there were only two episodes in the previous seasons, all together, in which I’d classify the “romance” as forced: Dagger of the Mind and A Private Little War.

What it’s interesting in this episode, in terms of Kirk/Spock, is the following scene:

Queen Deela links Kirk’s interest in Spock with “affection”. Affection, of course, can be just friendly affection... But this is not what she’s thinking about. For starters, she wants a demonstration of such affection, and it’s not friendship what she’s looking for. Deela’s interest in Kirk is explicitly sexual in nature (she needs him to beget children). And then there’s, of course, her lover Rael’s jealous reaction.

Moreover, this isn’t the last time a telepathic being reads into Kirk or Spock’s minds, and finds love in there. Because after this episode comes...

The Empath

A really lovely, heartwarming scene, in an otherwise dark episode filled with torture. Spock is looking at Kirk, while he rests after being tormented by their alien captors.

This attracts immediately the attention of Gem, the empathic woman who can sense other people’s feelings, and she turns towards Spock. 

Finding himself under surveillance, Spock quickly averts his eyes, but Gem approaches him and touches his shoulder, to better feel his emotions. And whatever she feels, it must be something really beautiful, since she makes this expression (coupled with sweet music in the background):

Gem can’t talk, but her face says it all. There’s also no dialogue in this scene, and yet it’s everything in the script. Could be friendship or loyalty what she’s sensing there? Could be... But Gem has been around Kirk, Spock and McCoy for a while at this point. Those kind of feelings shouldn’t surprise her anymore. Moreover, McCoy is right there, and he’s about to sacrifice himself for his friends. Yet she doesn’t turn towards McCoy. She must have sensed something new in Spock, a feeling she probably didn’t know till now. And I think it’s love.

Whom Gods Destroy

The second appearance of Shakepeare’s homoerotic sonnets, though this time, its relation with Kirk is weaker.

It’s actually Marta who starts reciting sonnet XVIII, till the fourth line. This is the full text:

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? Thou art more lovely and more temperate: Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, And summer’s lease hath all too short a date; Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines, And often is his gold complexion dimm'd; And every fair from fair sometime declines, By chance or nature’s changing course untrimm'd; But thy eternal summer shall not fade, Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow’st; Nor shall death brag thou wander’st in his shade, When in eternal lines to time thou grow’st: So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.

She’s interrupted, but then turns to Kirk and asks him how he liked it:

Yeah, she knows you’re into this stuff, Kirk. Deela knew, Gem knew, and now Marta knows too. These guys are so obvious... They’re not fooling the ladies.

Requiem for Methuselah

And speaking of obvious, this episode is as subtle as a brick through a window (“como un elefante en una cacharrería”, as I’d say in my own language).

First there’s Kirk falling in love at first sight with an android woman, who talks about sciency stuff just like Spock, and also has problems dealing with her emotions (for another example of parallels between Spock and an android struggling with emotions, see Star Trek: The Motion Picture).

And of course, there’s the final scene:

MCCOY: Well, I guess that's all. I can tell Jim later or you can. Considering his opponent's longevity, truly an eternal triangle. You wouldn't understand that, would you, Spock? You see, I feel sorrier for you than I do for him because you'll never know the things that love can drive a man to. The ecstasies, the miseries, the broken rules, the desperate chances, the glorious failures, the glorious victories. All of these things you'll never know simply because the word love isn't written into your book. Goodnight, Spock. SPOCK: Goodnight, Doctor. MCCOY: I do wish he could forget her.

McCoy accuses Spock of being unable to feel love (specifically romantic love, since that’s what Kirk felt for Rayna). What does Spock do once McCoy leaves? 

Exactly. He mind-melds with a sleeping Kirk and makes him forget Rayna (coupled with romantic music in the background). Now, if it wasn’t for McCoy’s speech, we could assume that Spock was just trying to help his Captain, even if using some unorthodox methods. But McCoy’s speech changes everything. He just told the viewer that Spock is unable to feel something like romantic love. Those were harsh words. And now Spock proves to the viewer that McCoy is wrong, that he can, indeed, feel love.

Again, it’s all in the script. It’s so obvious, that even people you wouldn’t usually link with K/S shipping seem to have got it. For example, this is what Marcy Lafferty (married to Shatner from 1973 to 1996) said about it in an interview (Shatner: where no man..., 1979) :

Turnabout Intruder

The final episode of TOS, and written by Roddenberry himself. Since it was the final episode (and probably everyone knew it at the time), it should have some grand plot, right? Something really glorious, and heroic, and epic. Maybe the Enterprise finally defeats the Klingons and Romulans, and achieves inter-planetary peace or something. Actually, the production team called this episode......... Captain Kirk: Space Queen.

Fuck yeah. Of course, the plot revolves around Kirk switching bodies with a crazed ex-girlfriend, who then proceeds to take hold of the Enterprise. But I wonder if, at some level, it was really about Shatner playing a woman inside a man’s body, or instead, playing a flamboyantly gay Kirk right under our noses. Specially since, while filming this episode, he changed a line out of nowhere to say “Spock, it’s always been you. Please say you love me too”. Was this finale a way for Roddenberry to give the middle-finger to the network that killed his show? Hard to know, and pure speculation on my part. But fun speculation nonetheless.

At the story level, there’s the scene where Kirk, inside Janice’s body, says that Spock is closer to the Captain than ANYBODY ELSE IN THE ENTIRE FREAKING UNIVERSE. And then Spock mind-melds with him. He didn’t make any mind-link with Kirk in previous seasons, but this is the fourth episode in which he melds with him in season 3. He got kind of an addiction to it. There’s also the moment where Spock leads Kirk, taking him by the wrist.

The effect of all this is kind of mitigated by the fact that Kirk occupies a female body at the moment. So even if, for story purposes, is a rather gay scene, the 60′s viewer is still seeing an actor having a tender moment with an actress (which would be nothing new).

But there’s the other side, as well:

Yeah, it’s actually Janice but, from the audience point of view, what we’re seeing here is the Captain Kirk that we got used to for 79 episodes. Getting all lovey-dovey with a man (unfortunately not Spock), and seducing him to kill for his sake. Also, the guy doesn’t seem to mind much that Janice has turned into this hunk of a man. He’s only concerned because of the murderous plan. Now think, was it really necessary to make Janice’s accomplice her lover as well? She already had a love interest in Kirk, and in the episode’s beginning, she was complaining about how lonely she felt.

Well, that’s all I have to say about this subject for TOS season 3 (which was a lot). If you’ve made it through all this text, thank you very much. And I’d be glad to hear your opinions.