#home of the eef people

[har-har-harvey]

this is the same tier as the fucking “HOME OF THE EEF PEOPLE” truck i see quite literally on a daily basis

i need to recreate this truck i saw with my eyes while driving on the highway today gimme a sec

[czigonas]

Alright. Hear me out. SoapGhost Mummy('99) fusion/AU with some WWI backstory (most of which is only implied in the films).

(This is entirely @appleciderp's fault because of both these two posts. Also my appreciation for OG Captain MacTavish's outfits.)

(Now, The Mummy is already not entirely historically accurate but I am also not a historian, so if I mess up some details about WWI, no I didn't. Most of this is just the plot of the movie but with the cod boys replacing a few people or just being added outright.)

Apple, here you go. (Also, this got really long, so it's under a cut.)

Captain John "Soap" MacTavish returns home to Scotland after serving in a unit attached to the EEF in WWI; a shadow of the man who went out to fight. While most of his company survived the brutal conditions of the Middle Eastern theatre where they were stationed, his trusted Lieutenant, Simon "Ghost" Riley, was one of those killed in the Battle of Megiddo just two months before the end of the war. His body was unable to be recovered.

In his attempts to drown his grief, Johnny loses track of most of the rest of his unit. All he has left is his younger sister Evelyn, as both of their parents died even before he was called to fight. To give themselves a new start - and both hope to curb his drinking and support his sister's blossoming career - they move to Egypt after donating a sizable chunk of their parents' estate to the library in the Cairo Museum, where it turns out the library curator is fellow ex-Captain, John Price.

(Going with Captain for Soap here because with the amount of money required to get Evelyn into her position, there's no way he wouldn't have had the money to purchase a commission. Don't worry, unlike Bey, Price won't die.)

Johnny steals reappropriates the map and box from O'Connell and, after Price tries to convince them Hamunaptra isn't real and they shouldn't pursue it, they negotiate to have O'Connell released from prison and get ready to head off down the river. The American company is lead by Dr. Shepherd and his cocky guide, Phillip Graves, who served with O'Connell in the French Foreign Legion during WWI.

When the Medjai attack the boat, Johnny gets briefly cornered by a fighter whose face is fully covered with cloth except for his eyes. While most of the Medjai are dressed similarly, this one's mask is unique and not easily pulled away from his face. The fighter hesitates to attack, however, letting Soap escape (but with a nagging feeling that he was somehow familiar).

Both groups reach the city at the same time and are again attacked by the Medjai. Johnny finds himself subtly shuffled out of danger by the same masked fighter that he encountered on the riverboat. While Ardeth gives his warning to Rick, Evelyn, and the Americans, Soap tries to ask where he and the fighter may have met before. He doesn't answer except to watch Johnny in return with what seems to Johnny to be somewhat frustrated puzzlement. The masked fighter leaves with the rest of the Medjai, though he seems reluctant to go.

While the Americans finally go to open the chest with the Book of the Dead, Graves decides to taunt O'Connell (and possibly attempt to flirt a bit with Soap) and so isn't present when the chest is opened and the curse activated. Evelyn steals reappropriates (like brother, like sister) the Book of the Dead from Shepherd's tent and reads the passage that resurrects Imhotep, which also sets off the plague of locusts.

Everyone flees into the city and, while Rick and Evelyn encounter Imhotep, Graves gets lost trying to find Soap, who has also wandered off a little. The masked fighter finds him first, however, and shuffles him back towards the rest of the party, leaving Graves to be found by the desiccated Imhotep after he's taken Burns' eyes and tongue.

(Torn between Graves being Jewish and saving himself the same way Beni does [prayers in Hebrew, which Imhotep recognises], having him enter the mummy's service some other way, having him die outright immediately, or even just him escaping somehow with or without Imhotep on his trail.)

Back in Cairo, Johnny realises he's being stalked by the masked Medjai, though he never manages to catch the guy to figure out why. He meets back up with Rick, Evelyn, Henderson, and Daniels in time to see Burns' drained body and Imhotep regenerate somewhat. After the mummy flees in fear of the cat, Rick sets Evelyn up in her room to be guarded by the Americans while he goes to warn Shepherd and Johnny goes to find the Medjai, hoping to finally get some answers (and maybe he's worried about the guy, nothing wrong with that).

He doesn't manage to find the masked fighter before Rick and Daniels catch up to him with the news that Shepherd is dead, however. They all rush back to Evelyn's room to scare off Imhotep with the cat again after Henderson gets eaten, and pack up to head towards the museum looking for answers.

And answers they find! Not only is Ardeth there with Price, but so is the masked fighter who's been stalking Johnny. Price and Ardeth lay out what's going on and while Rick, Evelyn, and Daniels ask the Medjai questions and start theorising about things, Price takes Soap to the side and reveals what he's kind of started to suspect: the masked fighter is Ghost, miraculously alive.

See, during the Battle of Megiddo, when Soap thought he saw Simon killed, he was actually just gravely injured. Because they were unable to reach him before the end of the battle - or even for a some time afterwards - he was picked up instead by the irregulars of the Hejaz and their allies who had also fought. While they were able to heal his physical wounds, Simon had also suffered significant memory loss and was unable to tell them which company he'd been attached to in order for them to help him get home.

Unfortunately, he was also somewhat mistrustful of those who had saved him, and slipped away sometime in the night to try and return to the only place that he had stuck in his head: Egypt, around Cairo, where his unit had been based out of. The Medjai had found him wandering the desert and took him in next, and he stayed because not only were they based in Egypt, which was familiar territory, but they were willing to teach him new ways to fight.

Price had recognised him once after Ardeth had brought him along to one of their regular meetings about the state of Hamunaptra, and had been trying to break through his memory loss ever since, with no luck. Soap was, essentially, their last hope on that front. Johnny declares that even if he can't manage to break through and Ghost never remembers, he won't leave Simon behind ever again.

He and Price (and Ghost who's approached them as they talked, focused entirely upon Johnny) rejoin the other four to escape the museum as the locals start to surround them. Poor Daniels gets dragged off and sucked dry along the way (not in a fun way), but the rest of them make it further until they're cornered. Evelyn agrees to go with Imhotep, now fully restored after eating the last American, demanding that the remaining four be spared if she does. Imhotep, of course, doesn't honour that agreement, but they're all four accomplished fighters and make their way into the sewers to escape.

They make their way to an airstrip where they find our boy Nikolai. (Nikolai had been fighting for the Russian Empire until the Revolution. He disagreed with the Bolshevik concessions to Germany as well as the general direction of the war, and ended up in Egypt, also fighting in the French Foreign Legion.) Nik and Price are well acquainted, and it takes no time to convince him they need to fly to Hamunaptra. Nikolai is an excellent pilot and, when Imhotep's sandstorm attempts to down them, he manages to execute an emergency landing with only injuries to himself and Price. Even though their injuries are relatively minor, Nik and Price are urged to stay behind at the crash site while everyone else continues on.

So Johnny, Rick, Simon, and Ardeth make their way in to Hamunaptra, determined to dig up the Book of Amun-Ra and save Evelyn. When they find themselves cornered by mummified priests, Soap and Ghost stay behind to fight them off while Rick and Ardeth confront Imhotep and save Evelyn.

Once the mummies are under Ardeth's command (as the one reading the inscription on the Book of Amun-Ra), Johnny and Simon finally manage to sit and have a bit of a talk and Simon takes off his mask. Turns out, he's been remembering more and more as he tries to figure out why Johnny is so familiar feeling. At this point, Ghost has almost all of his memories back, including the ones regarding how much he loved Soap. Johnny, of course, loves him back (and thinking he'd lost Simon, especially so close to the end of the war and them being free to be "good bachelor friends who live in a country house together", had been one of his major breaking points).

(I think if Graves was in Imhotep's service and survived this long, he definitely escapes the main temple with a bag of treasure, only to meet Soap and Ghost outside, still alive. He'd probably interrupt them kissing, tbh. He's that kind of cockblock. And then they'd either kill him for betraying them or leave him for the desert to kill.)

Rick, Evelyn, and Ardeth stumble out of the temple themselves, possibly after having deliberately set off a self-destruct booby trap. Ardeth takes the Book of Amun-Ra for safe keeping, much to Evelyn's disappointment. Ardeth and Ghost have a nice little chat where Ghost thanks the Medjai for taking care of him when he didn't know who he was. Ardeth denies the notion of any debt between them and wishes him well in the next chapter of his life.

The two couples gather up several of the camels, head back to the crash site to pick up Price and Nikolai, and then return to Cairo (and possibly everyone goes home to England, but possibly Price and Nik stay behind). Everyone splits the treasure they didn't realise had already been packed into the saddlebags.

(Gaz shows up in the next one, piloting the airship. Instead of being Rick's friend, he's Soap and Ghost's.)

[heinous-desiree]

Okokokok, if all your PCs existed in the same world together, would there be any changes in character if any?

Like would they all date the same people they did before? Would they all act the same now that there was someone who knew exactly what they were going through?

Ohhhh boy. So I do imagine Jas and Hunter in the same world, but... Like with there being fraternal twins of female Sydney and male Sydney. Also, two Robins. One is Jas' precious sister, and one is Hunter's boyfriend.

NOW LET'S SAY EEF THAT. YOU ALL GET ONE. Also, I'm adding my newest PC to the mix. Meet Dee the Disaster!

How do things change? First off, Jas will end up as all my fellow PCs' orphanage Mum at some point. Hunter was always her brother from another mother, Jas will spot Celeste working herself half to death eventually and step in, Maeve gets bullied so much that Jas will violently step in and provide consistent support, Dee will approach Jas herself.

Jas is... Much more stressed, traumatized, and worn out in this scenario. She never met Avery and had no steady weekly income when she started paying her debt. She also landed herself Robin's debt after three weeks of she paying her own. She ALSO can't stop herself from taking on her fellow orphans problems, so she does many unsavory things to make ends meet/help everyone.

She never ended up with Sydney, knowing Celeste's feelings for the religious librarian and believing Celeste is better for them. Jas instead found refuge in Alex. Without Sydney in her life, Alex became the kindest person she knew that she didn't see as family. Her life is tough and she has had a few breakdowns, but she's determined to make her found family's life as good as she can.

Hunter doesn't have a harem anymore. Most of his previous love interests are taken by other people. He will not get in the way of Celeste and Sydney too cute budding relationship, he will NOT steal his big sis Jas' partner Alex, he also never met Avery, Kylar is obsessed with another orphan, and he only has the law preventing him from killing Whitney for continuously bullying someone precious to him.

Speaking of precious to him, Hunter ends up with MAEVE. Hunter is weak to people that depend on him and cute things, with Sydney out and him never needing to save Robin, it was Maeve that filled out that role of being the one Hunter wanted to protect. Hunter became a fallen angel when he got intimate with Maeve, with Maeve gently caring for him when the horrific pain of falling from grace hit him. Hunter lost his mind when Maeve was taken away for not being able to pay his debt, and was so much more clingy when Maeve finally escaped (as a cowboy) and got home. They both still have sex with other people (just demon things), but they are each other's number one.

Celeste life is better in this world, just because she has an army of people that would stop her from over working and help her. She doesn't have to deal with Whitney's nonsense as much because Jas, Hunter, Dee, and her take turns beating up that bully. She no longer has to look over her shoulder in anxiety cause she doesn't have a stalker in this world. Jas studies with her, often teasing Celeste and urging the angel on how to pursue Sydney (Celeste feels like Jas looks longingly at Sydney sometimes?). Hunter is a bit awkward with her but always kind, trying his best to bring her out of her shell with games and jokes while trying not to offend her. Maeve will tug at her sleeves when she tries to keep working when the exhaustion starts kicking in, eyes doe and asking her for favors that involves her doing low energy tasks till bedtime. Dee has simply stepped in her life, told her to get it together, closed her textbook, and made her do... Fun and decent jobs around town to de-stress... And sometimes forces her to socialize with other people, mostly fellow students because, "your reputation sucks... Please, for the love of God, make some friends."

Celeste is happy... She plans to invite all of them to her wedding with Sydney when it comes. She never turns into a harpy in this world.

Maeve was the lucky orphan that caught Kylar's eye! So Maeve still ended up in between Whitney and Kylar's tug of war with Maeve as the rope... Well, initially, at least. Maeve was okay with having them in his life even when things... Got difficult. It's fine, they wanted him!

Then, Jas beat up Whitney for him when Maeve really... Really didn't want to do something Whitney asked. Then, Jas asked him if he was okay, smiled warmly, and helped him back to the orphanage. Maeve wanted to avoid her at first, she was too good for someone like him, and he felt guilty depending on her.

Then, he met Hunter, who scared off a group of bullies before they could do anything to him. Hunter was far more persistent than Jas in making sure Maeve was okay, with each incident of bullying, attacks in public, or just bruises that Hunter catches, the more the wolf boy stuck around, warm, patient, and kind... Made Maeve want this more than the humiliation Whitney gives him, or the creepy obsession of Kylar. Maeve felt safe...

Kylar kidnapped Maeve after the incident where he was sold to the farm. Jas, Hunter, Celeste, and Dee found him in record time, but it was Hunter that beat Kylar up, and Celeste that got the police involved.

Dee is with Avery, and she ensured it. In the beginning, her own security was the only thing that mattered. She needed moneybags to pick HER so she could protect herself. She had no intention of involving herself with other people, she couldn't afford to. She was small, weak, with no support. She refuses to let this town eat her alive.

...Things didn't go as plan. She managed fine, but her not all her fellow orphans did... She watched Jas slowly give more and more of herself away, and for what? Other orphans. Not even herself... Dee felt bad for her. She watched Celeste try her best to stay pure in this town despite making it impossible to make good money and she felt the angel was stupid... But admirable. And she felt her resolve snap, stopping Jas from taking on certain jobs and shoving money in her hands, "take care of yourself, idiot." And forcing Celeste to kick back and relax before she collapsed, "come on, church girl. Dance in the name of the lord! It's called having fun!"

They are all a messy family. But they have each other. (Of course, even in this world Hunter fucks his pseudo brother.)

[hirokiro]

pt 9 Princesses, Dragons, and Elves oh my!

~*

Basically the same argument broke out all over again. Gill listened to Lana try to reason with Glen and she seemed to do marginally better. Women had such a way with words when it came to pulling on the heart-strings. If Glen had a heart.

“Let me put it this way,” Lana was pacing around at this point, back and forth in front of Gill as if protecting him instinctually, “You would hate to lose me and Gill, right? If I died it would be terrible to you, right?”

Glen complained, “This isn’t the-”

“It’s exactly the same.” Lana pushed, “Glen, think about other people’s feelings besides your own. You worried about Gill when you caused that panic attack and when he passed out. You told me yourself when he wasn’t talking to us you wanted to ask him if he was okay. You were worried. Now imagine someone else feeling that same worry, only they’re worried their daughter has been eaten or worse, and they want her back and safe. Just like you wanted Gill well again, right?”

“Mmmguess so…” Glen reluctantly yielded a little, “He was scaring me.”

Gill wanted to find some humor in the situation but he was busy fighting panic and trying not to let the distressing continuation of his and Glen’s argument feed into the struggle to calm down.

“So you see. And I know you see,” Lana reiterated, “I have to go see my family. And honestly, right now, I’m really missing them, Glen. I need to see them.”

Glen raked the ground a couple times, “But would you come back?” he challenged, clearly not believing it, “Once you’ve told them and grieved and all that?”

Lana didn’t reply immediately, looking away sadly, “I would, Glen. I would if it were up to me. But I don’t know if it would be possible. This is an unusual situation.”

“See? Exactly!” Glen grumbled, “You would go away and not come back! I bet even if you promised, you wouldn’t! They’d all stop you and you’d make excuses!”

Lana didn’t reply. She and Gill knew why it might be impossible for her to come back even if they tried to negotiate with the king, find some middle ground. It might happen but it also might not. Lana knew her father better than he did. There was no explaining to Glen that he would have to accept whatever the outcome and quit being selfish.

Glen rumbled irritably, the ground trembling as Gill got control of himself, feeling small and exposed after this second panicky moment. It was less severe but as always it left him feeling like a cowardly idiot who was a pathetic excuse of a person.

“... I… I’d come back.” he managed to speak up faintly.

“Mm?” Glen stopped the rumbling and lowered his head, “What was that?”

Gill took another shaky breath, willing himself to repeat it more loudly, “I’d come back, Glen. Or even… If… if you don’t trust my word then just… put me somewhere I can’t escape and after you take Lana back, if you do, I’ll still be here for you.”

~*

The dragon blinked, and he felt a funny stirring in his stomach. That was kind of strange how Gill put it. But the elf was yet again trying to compromise with him, and he didn’t think he liked it as much as the arguing. When they argued he knew he was in the right, and seeing Gill angry was funny. When this little elf gave in and tried to appease him, he felt sort of bad about it. Fighters like Gill were usually very proud. Proud of their strength like a dragon was proud of theirs. The elf’s humility was just so… so… eef! It made Glen so uncomfortabllllllle!

Gill was weird. He was a weird, unnatural little man and Glen only wanted him all the more and now he was feeling bad for not trusting this little elf who was trying so hard to win this fight in any way other than by tooth and sword.

Mmmmmmgh… he knew if he asked it of Gill, the elf would agree to dying in order for Lana to go home. He knew it deep down that the elf was sincere. Desperate enough to do anything.

“Hmmmff…” he looked up and away, tail thrashing irritably as he contemplated and mulled things over. Everything Gill had gone through to get here. Risking his life in the swamps, even weathering an attack that left him wounded enough that he said he was unlikely to put up much of a fight anyway if it came to it. Practically dead on his feet from lack of sleep. And still he had approached the dragon rather than wait to recover at least. Anything to get to Lana sooner and find out if she was alright.

They were… probably right. It just wasn’t fair! Having to go back to sleepless nights when he thought of Lana as his, and a friend who cared! The first person who got along with him and he didn’t feel the need to make her fear him. Someone different and special to him.

“Mmm…” Nostrils flared as more smoke burst from them, “Fine… Fine. After everything you’ve gone through, Gill, and this hard news about your brother, Lana… It’s only right. This is… bigger than my needs.”

He looked down to see Lana had brightened up, smiling, “Thank you Glen!” she exclaimed gratefully, relief and happiness on her face as she clasped her hands.

But Gill still sat, head bowed where Glen couldn’t see his face, know what he was thinking. His hand was still clutching his shirt, he was still breathing laboriously. It had to have cost a lot to speak up.

Hnnnnnn, guilt!

“Let’s just… give it a little time and figure out how to do this.” Glen added, “I know Gill, you said you wanted to be there to break the news and be with them, and all that. It would’ve been easiest to fly you both in but I can’t do that.”

To his surprise Gill did look up, a confused expression on his face.

“You mean.. You’d let me go back?” Gill asked, eyes searching.

“Well. I-” On the spot, Glen scratched the side of his head, looking to one side. He hadn’t meant to talk about that possibility yet. “Well. I guess I would.” he admitted in the end, “Just, you know. Test your honesty, you know. I could find you anyway if you didn’t come back.”

Not really the truth, and he was pretty sure Gill thought the same. Gill was a survivalist, he would know how to disappear where Glen couldn’t find him.

“I appreciate the faith,” Gill replied, “Truly. It means a lot.”

“Don’t get me wrong,” Glen added, trying to save face, not seem like a softy, “It’s not like I trust you or anything. But I won’t know your worth until you’ve proven it to me.”

Gill chuckled a little, “That’s true. But really, you are truly magnanimous to let us go. I know this is very hard for you, and I can’t begin to show my gratitude.”

“Hmmm…” Glen wasn’t exactly certain what that meant but it must be related to Magnificent. And he liked that, “Flattery will get you nowhere.” he tried to look aloof.

But Gill only laughed weakly and stood, slowly, “Alright, well, I’m going to now go walk like I meant to, and we’ll come back to things. I have to clear my head and… yeah…”

Glen raked at the ground nervously, “Should you be walking around so soon?”

He didn’t like how Gill waved him off.

“I’ll be alright. It’ll help me calm down. And… like before,” Gill hesitated, not meeting anyone’s eyes, “Let’s just pretend it never happened and not dwell on it or anything. I don’t want to think about it and I don’t… really want to see sympathy. Just pretend it never happened, please.”

“Pretend what never happened?” Lana asked with an innocent expression.

Gill snapped his fingers and pointed at her, “Exactly.” he said with a little more cheer before taking off.

“Oh, but– alright…” Glen watched him go, feeling the want to nab him and bring him close. He didn’t want Gill out of sight right after another one of those panic things happened. Oooh that boy was so fragile! He needed to stay right here!

This was going to be hard, letting them go. Gill had been trying to protect Lana all this time but who would protect him? What if something hap-?

“So,” Lana looked back up, hands on her hips, “Got some kind of plan for how we get back? Round up some horses?” she joked.

“Mnnnn… Not really. And they’d probably die of fright,” Glen sighed, “It wouldn’t work to just fly you and make Gill go the long way back. It kind of… well, doesn’t seem like a point in letting him go if he has to take all that time and you’ve already told everyone and he just… Is he okay?”

Lana blinked, “I… I don’t know, Glen,” she replied doubtfully, “I heard you guys shouting and then all of sudden you were apologizing… and Gill was sitting there. I don’t know. It’s… were you going to fly?”

“I really wasn’t.” Glen assured her, “I just wanted to shake him a little. A little.” he reiterated, “I was being careful in that regard. I didn’t realize he might think I would just because I was angry…”

Lana sighed and began to walk stiffly about. She noted the Elf’s pack.

“He said he left some stuff for you to eat,” Glen commented helpfully.

“Oh, that was kind of him,” she didn’t immediately look, “Glen…” she glanced back up, “You don’t think… You know… He might actually… also be afraid of dragons. You think? Similar to his flying problem?”

Glen shrugged, “No, I think the opposite. He’s not all that afraid. He told me he’s used to dragons, and probably too bold around them. He’s not afraid. He was just afraid of my anger in the moment. Not me as a creature. Not like that. Cautious and all that. Healthy amount of respect for the danger.”

She didn’t look entirely convinced and Glen snorted a little, annoyed, “He said he had some good experiences too, so it's not like all he’s known is trouble with us as a species. There’s just been some very unfortunate coincidences going on over time.”

“It certainly seems that way.”

(And been stuck again. Been uploading in inconsistent bursts even with already having this as far as it is, and dunno. Might redo the last few paragraphs, rework. Am tired.)

[sparkledcrowns]

‘ rachel hilson, cisfemale, she/her, 28 / 280 , high fae ’ ― cauldron save you. it seems aoife hathaway has finally made it to the capital, the second in command/cousin from the winter court is said to be resourceful and is said to describe themselves with gossipy tea sessions with her inner court full of fun and laughter, snow angels and snowball fights to ease any tensions between her head and heart, sarcastic quips that are sometimes not appreciated, bubble baths full of songs and more suds than possible  and with all of this in mind their flaky nature always seems to get them into trouble. may the mother hold them as they navigate this unthinkable time.

full name: aoife marie hathaway nicknames:  eef age: 28/280 date of birth: april 4th gender: cisfemale pronouns: she/her sexual orientation: bisexual faceclaim: rachel hilson hair color: black eye color: dark brown height: 5'4 attoos: lots all over her back, winter themed signature scent: coconut & honey

background:

aoife was born into the world of the winter court with nothing but love. she was brought up next to the high rulers, one of their cousins. the winter court was her home. it was what made her feel special. she knew that it was the only place that she'd ever wanted to give her life to, no matter what. as she grew up, she learned very quickly that if she wanted to get anywhere in life, you had to be able to stick up for yourself. aoife made sure she knew everything about everyone, about where to go, about what to do, about how to help her court. very quickly, she knew she was the person to go to if you wanted strategies or any kind of information on how to proceed with a task.

she thoroughly enjoyed helping out her court as she grew older and somehow managed to find herself in the position of 2nd in command. aoife relishes in this job, adores the power it gives her. but that doesn't stop her from sometimes second guessing herself. especially after the accident, she worries that she won't be good enough, and she won't be able to protect them from something happening again. but she'll try her damned hardest. and will fight like the devil to do it.

personality:

aoife is scrappy and she knows it. she knows that her small stature doesn't intimidate many people and that's partially how she likes it! she's got a kind nature if you're on her good side, and otherwise, she'll learn everything about you and use it against you later. adventure calls her name, all the time, begging her to get lost in the woods and try to figure out how to get out on her own. she adores any kind of thrill that she can get from anything. but when she opens up to you, she's silly and goofy, and loves anything that sounds fun.

[giratina-and-the-skys-bouquet]

In regards to this, meet the roadtrip squad from hell kiddos!

💭 THOUGHT BALLOON — what is your oc's MBTI, enneagram, and/or other personality aspects (if known/interested in)?

Kit- The campaigner: creative and likes to stick to the bright side. Enjoys group activities and is intuitive. Solidly in-between thinker and feeler. Tries to feel happy as much as possible, to the point where she has trouble expressing negative emotions. Very disorganized.

Tobio: The executive: A god at organizing, either it be people or objects. An observant person who thinks before he feels, but is also eccentric about things he is passionate about. However, he is highly stubborn and self-critical, making connections at an emotional level hard.

Eef: The defender: Capable, supportive, the ultimate friend. Never seeks the spotlight but still has unusually high standards for people. Hardworking and reliable to those he deems fit. Has a tendency to hold a grudge.

🚗 CAR — does your oc have a driver's license? can they drive/operate any automobiles/machinery besides cars?

Kit is literally the squads bike driver and main hazard remover. If she was old enough and if cars still existed than yes.

Tobio: would rather make a car than drive it

Eef: sits in the back drinking a shamrock shake

✈️ AIRPLANE — does your oc like traveling, or do they consider themselves a more homey person?

All of them travel.

🎮 VIDEO GAME CONTROLLER — what are three of your oc's favorite hobbies?

Kit likes playing with her friends (see: Eef and Tobio) Hopsotch is her favorite

Tobio likes machines in general. Tinkering with them, making them, all that jazz

Eef has a knife collection. He chews on the plastic ones.

💍 RING — does your oc have any piercings? do they want any (more) piercings?

No. They do not have piercings. Doesn't mean that Tobio has tried to get Oceania to let him go to Claires.

🖊️ BALLPOINT PEN — does your oc have any tattoos? do they want any (more) tattoos?

Again no. But only if we are talking about permanent ones. If you include the ones that are temporary, Kit is covered head to toe with generic girly ones, Tobio has a couple of machinery around his elbows and Eef has a bunny rabbit on his left hand.

📚 BOOKS — what level of education has your oc most recently completed/is currently in (GED, undergraduate, grad school, phd, etc)?

They don't go to school.

🎻 VIOLIN — does your oc play any instruments? what is their skill level (beginner/intermediate/advanced/virtuoso/etc)?

All of them play very bad recorder. You know, the plastic kind they give you in fourth grade that costs only two bucks max.

🩹 ADHESIVE BANDAGE — does your oc have any physical and/or mental disabilities?

#AutismGang4life

🩸 DROP OF BLOOD — what is your oc's blood type?

Kit is A+, Tobio is AB+ and Eef is O+

🎶 MUSICAL NOTES — what type of music does your oc like? do they listen to music very often?

Kit loves fucked up music that sounds innocent. 1 MARETU fan. Tobio listens to chiptune. Eef likes stupid remixes of popular songs. All of them try to listen to music as much as possible

💯 HUNDRED POINTS SYMBOL — share three random facts about your oc that others may not know.

Kit

Can speak 7 languages fluently.

Is immune to Poison Ivy

Has a tumblr blog but she only posts low-quality videos of cats. It's easily one of the biggest blogs on the site

Tobio

Is not in fact an orphan like he tells people. He ran away from home.

Secretly a massive fanboy of the Care Bears

Proofreads Kit's creepypastas

Eef

Has an allergy to shrimp

Owns a massive Chuck. E. Cheese cardboard cutout that is bigger than him. It is his greatest treasure.

Can't spell the word animal to save his life.

💤 SLEEPING SIGN — is your oc a light sleeper or a heavy sleeper? how are their sleeping habits?

Kit is all over the place. Tobio is a light but very long sleeper. Eef is the opposite of Tobio.

🔱 TRIDENT EMBLEM — can your oc swim? do they enjoy swimming?

None of them can swim.

🔺 RED TRIANGLE POINTED UP — does your oc know how to use any weapons?

Y e s. It comes standard when you grow up in a wasteland.

🔶 LARGE ORANGE DIAMOND — does your oc know cpr? do they have any other medical expertise?

All of them only know movie CPR. Tobio does know how to treat mild illnesses, like the common cold. Kit amputated [SPOILERS] (very badly, but it was the thought that counts)

🚫 PROHIBITED — does your oc drink/smoke? do they do it regularly, or is it more on occasion or for special events?

Only if you count Root Beer. They save it for special events.

🌈 RAINBOW — what is your oc's sexual orientation/gender identity? what pronouns do they use?

Kit is a transgirl that's bi! Tobio is the token cis guy, and Eef is gender questioning asexual. (all of them use their assigned at birth pronouns, except Kit)

🎄 CHRISTMAS TREE — what is your oc's favorite holiday?

they don't have holidays anymore. Not after the Drink incident. exempt birthdays. heavily supervised birthdays.

🐶 DOG FACE — does your oc have any pets?

No. Eef wants a rabbit, however. one of those tiny ones.

🐈 CAT — does your oc prefer a wide circle of friends or a few close friends?

Kit wants a wider circle of buddies, but these guys will do! Both Tobio and Eef fall into the latter category.

🐷 PIG FACE — what is your oc's favorite animal?

Tobio doesn't really care. Eef adores rabbits. Kit will infodump everything she knows about rattlesnakes at you at any given time.

🐉 DRAGON — what is your oc's favorite mythical creature?

Kit wishes dragons were real. Tobio likes the Loch Ness Monster and other extinct animal myths. Eef thinks that a wizard is an animal.

🍃 LEAVES FLUTTERING IN WIND — what is/was your oc's favorite subject in school?

yet again, none of them go to school

🌴 PALM TREE — does your oc have a green thumb? do they enjoy gardening?

nope none of them lol

🍎 RED APPLE — where was your oc born? do they still live in/around their place of birth or do they live somewhere else? how do they feel about their birthplace?

Alright time to break character for a bit. I caught Tobio outside Rustboro, Eef near Littleroot and Kit around Mauville. As for their In-universe homes, Kit has born in that island place where Brawly is a gym leader, Tobio is from Petalburg and Eef straight up didn't have a home. Kit would never go back home, same with Tobio. Eef has constantly on the move, so he really doesn't care for stuff like that.

🖤 BLACK HEART — has your oc killed or seriously wounded anyone before? have they broken someone's heart and/or broken someone's trust?

No for Tobio, No for Eef and Kit killed her [REDACTED] by accident.

🎂 BIRTHDAY CAKE — when is your oc's birthday? how old are they?

Kit was born on Nov. 6 and is 12. Tobio was born on The last day of August and is 13. Eef was born on the 16th of May and is also 12

[ink-on-the-brink]

Yandere Merc Dads (Imagine)

[Heavy, Sniper, Demo]

Heavy

You come under Heavy's care most likely because someone he was close to could no longer care for you. Whether that was because of their death or other circumstances can vary. He will hesitate to take a young child in, but if pressured enough he won't push the responsibility away.

"Why me? Meesha ees not-"

"Because you're all they have left"

Heavy is very well known for being a protector and when it comes to children you can bet your ass that protectiveness intensifies, let alone one he's responsible for. He's sheilding and vigilant at every turn and will most definitely throw himself into harm's way if it means protecting you.

"You weesh to see Y/n? HA! You amuse me. Please tiny baby man, say more."

His obsession comes almost immediately. If you are a child placed under his care, this will be an immediate connection as every fiber in his being is set on defense mode. You are family, so he would sooner see himself face a thousand hells than let you get even mildly injured.

"Thees is Y/n. You hurt them, you die. Ees simple"

While he doesn't have his eyes constantly on you as he still allows you to experience the world and learn to be on your own, he will always keep tabs on you. He always knows where you are, where you're going to be, and who you will be around. If, however, he does lose track of you he will not stop until he finds you. He will head to every single possible place you could be and any soul that steps in his way will be crushed. During this time he will hold a cold yet terrifying stare on his face, like an angry bear looking for his cub. Upon finding you, however, he will immediately melt into worry and without asking you why or how he'll take you back home, only asking if you were hurt the whole way.

"Where ees leetle-"

"Misha? How did you-"

"Y/n! I have looked everywhere for you! You are not hurt? Thees ees good. We will talk later. I weel take you home now"

"What- hey! Put me down!"

While to others Heavy might appear as a man only made for destruction, he can be rather sentimental and extremely caring with people he cares about. On top of that, he is undoubtedly amazing with kids. When he cares about them, at least.

"Come. Eet is bedtime"

"But I don't wannaaaaa"

"Hm...I weell sing you lullaby eef you do"

"...fine"

The little things are what matters most to Heavy. Each little achievement is congratulated and he will encourage you to do what you care about. He hopes that if he can give you the life he and his sisters never had, you'll be able to grow up normal and hopefully manage to get away from the life of bloodshed he's lived with.

"Misha! Look! I made it for you!"

"Ohhhh eet ees nice work! Misha loves it!"

He calls you "Solnishko" which means "sun" or "little sun". You remind him of the sunlight he saw in Sabira. It was never expected, but each glimpse of it was cherished.

"Come Solnishko, eet ees time to get up"

"But whyyyyy"

He will allow you to go to school if you wish, but he has no problem homeschooling you. He is rather educated and has enough general life experience to teach you how you survive and the basics. Though his teachings are in Russian, so you best get to learning that quickly.

"у нас сегодня много работы (we have a lot of work today)

"у нас всегда много работы (we always have a lot of work)"

"Hm?"

"Nothing!"

Now, as stated earlier, Heavy's protective. So the singular moment anyone, and I mean anyone threatens your safety, they're gone. He will not have you hurt, he wouldn't be able to live with himself if you were. The younger you are the worse this is because he knows you are completely defenseless and that he's the only thing standing between you and death. Even so, he will not harm anyone in front of you unless it's absolutely necessary. He doesn't want you to be afraid of him, nor does he want you to grow up near violence.

"Misha! Help!"

"No one's gonna hear you-ack!"

"You theenk eet ees good idea to mess with them? Hm? Thees makes you very stupeed"

Heavy's rules are simple and easy to follow. One, always tell him where you are, two, don't lie, and three, never ever join any type of violent career. His worst possible fear is you picking up on his job and thinking that it's cool or that you want to grow up like him. He doesn't want you to do anything that requires bloodshed and will try to get you to avoid it at all costs, even if it comes at the cost of your present happiness. He knows in the long run it's better if you don't go down that path.

"B-But I want to be just you! You're no strong and-"

"Nyet. Y/n should not want to be like me. I have bad job. I only do eet for money. You weell not do the same. Thees ees final time we talk about thees"

Upon breaking any of these rules though, he does have his punishments. He is nothing if not fair though and never goes overboard with it. He won't yell and he rarely gets angry but he will take away privileges and assign harder chores. Groundings are also common though manual labor is what he believes to be the best way to discourage you from breaking the rules.

"Am I done yet?"

"Nyet. You steel have two more bags"

"Ug! This is so stupid-"

"Play stupeed games, ween stupeed prizes. Get back to work"

However, if you were to break a big rule, and I'm talking you lied about where you were going and started messing around with bad people kind of breaking rules, his calmness will cease to exist. It will be one of the few times he ever gets angry at you. It alone will be enough to get you shaking in your boots. It's after that though, when you see tears rushing down his face, likely due to the fear your actions have caused him, that you'll truly be hit with the reality of what you've done.

"I hate it here! I'm never allowed to do anything! I'm just- just- a fucking puppet!"

"...Я работаю на тебя, я истекаю кровью ради тебя. Я делаю все, что в моих силах, чтобы дать тебе хорошую жизнь, и Я НЕ УВИЖУ, ЧТО ТЫ ЕЕ РУШИШЬ! (I work for you, I bleed for you. I am doing everything in my power to give you a good life and I WILL NOT SEE YOU RUIN IT!)

"..."

"Hate me eef you weesh. But you weell not make same mistakes I did"

Growing up you will soon notice his overprotectiveness and deep fear of you getting hurt. The older you grow and the more you start to notice how abnormal this was, especially once you become an adult and learn of not only his past, but the jobs he worked as you grew older and how hard he tried to keep that part of his life hidden from you.

"You...You're a killer..."

"I deed what I had to..."

However, you will still love him, because despite his extreme care he truly did and will continue to always want the best for you. He is also one of the few in the team that will let you live your life and become the strong person he taught you to be with no interference. He let's you make mistakes and learn from them, he's just here to beat the absolute shit out of (and effectively murder) those who dare to hurt you in the process.

"I understand...I'm glad you were the one I ended up with"

"Meesha ees glad as well"

He will always love you too. There is never one day where he doesn't think about you or the memories you made together. He will, until the day he dies, be there for you and will always insist on protecting you, even as he grows old and you grow stronger.

'Так невинно...Если бы только мир позволил тебе остаться таким (So innocent...If only the world would let you stay that way)'

After all, he's the only one truly able to keep you safe.

Sniper

You were the result of his parents growing lonely when he left and adopting another kid to raise. And so you came under his care at probably the most tragic time of his life. Finding out his parents were dead.

"Mum? Pa? Oi'm home! Where-...oh no"

He almost resented you at first. Both of his parents died yet you lived!? You!? This useless blabbering pipsqueak was what they left alive? Soon though, he'll recognize that anger and realize that his parents had cared about you. They had been loving you the same way they had loved him. You were his sibling and there was no way in hell he'd ever want you to end up with anyone but him. So, after pulling himself together, he took up the mantle as your caretaker.

"They're gone...they...they're gone..."

His feeling of obsession was almost immediately after his realization. He'd let his parents be killed, he wasn't about to let you get killed too. No, he'd be there for you. He'd keep you safe. He wouldn't lose the last person in the world that he cared about. The last remaining piece of his stitched together family.

"No no don't cry, oi'm here. You remember me don't cha? Your big brother! It's gonna be okay...it's gonna be okay..."

While Sniper wasn't the most emotionally available or openly loving person, he had his own way of showing his care. Little things every now and again and his (mostly awkward) attempts to be involved in your life. He often found himself acting like his father. Sure, he might have never said as much as he should, and maybe he was a bit hard to talk to, but you knew as well as him that he'd lay his life down for you, and that there was never a day he ever regretted having taken you in, no matter how overwhelmed he became with the prospect of basically being a father.

"So uh...you ever read any books?"

"I don't know how to read"

"Roight, roight. Forgot about that"

This can be best described when he loses track of you. The moment he realizes you've been gone too long he's panicking. Like a chicken with its head cut off, he's trying to find you even in his panicked state. It will be one of the very few times you ever see him truly scared. Once he finds you he's at the point of cursing and, though he might seem angry with you at first, it's more so that he thought he had truly lost the only family he had left. He'll apologize later if he goes overboard, though it may take a few days for him to do so.

"Y/n! Y/n! Where the fu-"

"Mick?"

"Y/n! Where the bloody hell have you been!?!? You can't just run off whenever you want!"

You aren't allowed to go to any type of school, it isn't necessary. In his mind all that matters is what he teaches you, everything else isn't important enough to care about.

"Alroight, you're gonna learn how to make a fire today"

"But it's raining..."

"Oi'm aware'a that. We're still doin it"

Sniper's not good with children. He was always a loner as a kid and a bit mature for his age. That and he's never had to take care of a kid before. So it's more than a few times that he treats you as more mature than you are, and thus more culpable for your actions. It's often that he has to remind himself you aren't fully able to do adult things yet, and that he should be a bit more lenient with small mistakes.

"Y/n? You seen my-...hat"

"..."

'They're only a kid, they're only a kid, they're only a kid-' "WHERE DID YA EVEN GET GLUE?!?!?"

Small moments with Sniper include hunting, camping, and long road trips. You two will go place to place around in his camper, though most of your time is spent outdoors. The moment you're old enough to hold a gun he's going to teach you how to shoot and once you hit your teen years he'll take you on hunting trips. He will 100% give you your own gun for your tenth birthday.

"Alroight, you're getting older now, and it's about toime ya started helpin out. So oi got ya this"

"...holy shit really?!"

"Oi! Watch your language!...it is a beaut though ain't it?"

He calls you "little joey". Mostly because he finds it funny.

"Let's get it movin little joey-"

"Hey! I'm not little"

"...you sure about that?"

When it comes to protecting you from the outside world, Sniper takes preventative measures. He pretty much isolates you, only allowing very minimal contact with strangers. Not only that, but his weapons training isn't just for hunting. He's teaching you how to defend yourself and to always be alert and ready. He will instill this paranoia so deeply that even he can't sneak up on you.

"...I can hear you"

"You're gettin good"

"Learned from the best"

If, however, you were to be threatened in any way, or others were to threaten to take you away from him, he won't even blink an eye before killing them. He doesn't care who they are or what future threat the action might pose. He can deal with that after he's sure you are safe with him. Due to this, you will grow up not entirely unfamiliar with death and thus grow cold towards the action. Sniper finds this to be a good thing because he believes it's better to be hardened and alive than trusting and dead.

"Looks like you've come crawlin round the wrong neck'a the woods...say, why don't we make a deal? Give me the kid and I'll let you be on your merry-"

BOOM!

"...M-Mick-"

"We gotta get movin. Ain't no way he's the only one around here"

"..."

"Oi said get movin!"

He is terrible at setting strict rules considering he's always flip-flopping between considering you a child and considering you as an adult. Some of his clearer rules though are to keep away from people, always have a weapon on you, and to never leave his care for more than a few minutes at a time. All of these rules tie back to his paranoia and his deep fear that the people that killed his parents are coming for the both of you next.

"I'm gonna head down to the lake for some water"

"Got your gun?"

"Yep"

"Ya hear anyone down there?"

"Nope"

"Be back in five minutes tops"

"On it"

Breaking these rules has many different punishments. Most include getting yelled at because he really just isn't sure what the best way to discipline a kid is and it's the first thing that ever comes to mind. Other times you'll be grounded to the camper, unable to leave it for days or even weeks at a time. Most times though, when it's a small mistake that isn't very harmful or could lead to danger down the line, he'll just grumble and tell you not to do it again.

"What were you thinkin! That could have been dangerous! How many toimes have oi told you ta stay away from strangers! They could'a hurt ya!"

If you were to manage to do something completely against what he asks of you, such as trying to run away or talking to a group of strangers, he just loses it. You will never get far from him and the moment he has his hands on you he's silent. Stone cold. He'll drag you back to the camper if he has to and no matter how much you yell, kick or scream he isn't going to let you go. The moment you're in the camper he slams the door shut and finally releases you. When you turn back to look at him his face is unreadable. He'll stare at you a moment before silently heading to the front of the camper. He won't talk to you for weeks, even if you beg him to. What you don't notice is how much your actions shattered him. You'll instead only interpret anger and resentment.

"Are you still mad at me?"

"..."

"Look I'm sorry okay! I just-...I just wanted to hang out with them for a little bit"

"..."

"Fine! Don't talk to me! Not like there's much of a difference"

As you grow older and you notice how much of a vice grip he has on your life, you, like any teenager or young adult, will want to explore the world. Every time you make an attempt though, he's quick to shut you down. Eventually you'll either run or you'll explode at him about wanting to leave. Either way, it will turn dark very, very quickly.

"I HATE IT HERE! I HATE YOU! WHY WON'T YOU LET ME LIVE!?!? YOU'RE RUINING MY LIFE! I'D BE BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU!"

He won't let you leave. Even once you're an adult he doesn't want you to be anywhere without him. So if it becomes a big enough problem, and you are making genuine attempts to leave him, he'll resort to what he has to. Even if that means locking you in the camper or, worse yet, tying you down. Maybe even putting a tracker on you.

'Ya can't leave- ya can't leave! You're all Oi've got left! Ya can't just go, you're moi family! Ya backstabber! Oi give ya everythin oi can and you just go'n ruin it! Foine! Two can play this game!'

He can't lose you. He's lost everything else. He just can't lose you too.

Demo

The family tradition is that if a DeGroot has a kid, they must be separated into adoption at birth, so he's very much hesitant about having any kids, even though he would love one. Buuuut, you know what isn't tradition? Having one delivered right to his doorstep! Since you weren't through his efforts at adoption, and you weren't directly his kid, that means he bypassed tradition! So he gladly took you in. It wasn't like his mother was complaining either. At this rate she was just glad that he had something to be responsible for.

"Maw! Look what I found sitin' on the fron' step!"

It was love at first giggle for him. The moment you stared at him with those wide happy little eyes he was hooked. You were everything he dreamed of in a child, he couldn't have asked for a better miracle!

"Oh ain't yeh just a lit-"

*giggles*

"...ye're perfect!"

Demo is nothing if not the doting type. He's constantly and always finding new things about you to get excited about. Every tiny little thing you do becomes the biggest deal in the entire world. To the point where it might be overbearing or patronizing. But he does truly and genuinely get overly excited. He just can't get over how amazing you are!

"Me lit'le one's doin so well! Just look at yeh! I couldn't'a asked for a beh'er-"

"I get it, I'm amazing, can we go now?"

"...but yer just so- so-"

"Please don't start crying again-"

*immediately breaks down into sobs*

He isn't the type to be over-obsessed with your location at any point. As long as he has a general idea he's fine. Mostly because he isn't away from you very often. Hanging out with him is genuinely fun, so you rarely spend time away from him, especially as a kid. That being said while he might not know your location he definitely knows who you're with. He believes as long as you're around people he fully trusts then everything will be fine.

"Dad! I'm heading out to the shop!"

"Fer what?"

"Just to look around. I'm kinda bored"

"Headin out with Milly aren't yeh?"

"...yeah..."

"Alright, don' be gone too late"

"Wait really? Cool!"

Demo is absolutely amazing with children. He genuinely enjoys playing with them and he finds them adorable. However, His alcoholic habits can and will interfere with this trait. When you came into his life he tended to limit himself a bit so that he could take care of you, but it's still a habit and he can sometimes go overboard, not to mention its necessity. Usually, his mother takes care of you when he's had too much and the next day he will feel extremely guilty for indulging himself. He will greatly restrict himself after these binges, but he knows he needs it so he never fully gives it up.

"Dad? Are you dead?"

"Nay, he's just steamin. Looks like I'm Gonnae be puttin yeh ta bed tonight"

Demo is always trying to find something fun for the both of you to get up to. He's never against a bit of mischief, in fact he loves it! Once you're old enough he'll start teaching you about bombs and the basics of chemistry. You two will often build your own fireworks to set off, just for fun.

"Da! Can I light it this time?"

"Aye! Course ya can!"

Demo undoubtedly calls you "Mo chridhe" which means "my heart".

"What does mo chridhe mean?

"Me heart"

"Oh...why do you call me that?"

"Cause ye just take up me whole heart!"

He would prefer to send you to a public school. He knows he has some weak spots in his education and with his busy life juggling a kid, a blind financially dependent mother, and work, he can't always be there. So off to public school it is!

"Do yeh got what yeh need?"

"Mm-hum!"

"...do yeh got somethin yeh shouldn't?"

"...no..."

"Y/n-"

"It's just some chemical stuff! I wanna show the other kids!"

"...well alright then, off with yeh!"

Now Demo is on the lower end of crazy when it comes to obsession. He's not trying to inhibit your life in any way and is actually a really good father.

But pray for the poor soul who hurts you.

If anyone hurt his wee bonnie, it's murder time. Be that mentally or physically, it doesn't matter. He will not put up with anyone hurting you, he will not stand for it. When he finds out, his first objective is to console you and make sure you're completely okay. You won't even notice his held-back fury. After you're consoled, and preferably when you're fully away, he's going to find and kill this bitch. No questions. He doesn't care what their reason is, they should never have even gone near you with any mal intent. In his eyes you were perfect. You were everything he cared about. So he had no problem killing those who threatened your safety.

"There yeh are!...what 'appened?"

"M-My teacher got mad at me. I was doing an experiment and I was just about to get to the fun part when she shoved me away. Then there was a big explosion because she didn't let me do the next part! And now I'm in big trouble!"

"...she shoved yeh? Oh me sweet lit'el bairn, don't worry. Yeh ain't hurt are yeh?"

"I got a bad bruise on my arm..."

"Alright, we'll get that fixed up when we get home. In the meantime, I'll be talkin to that mean ol' teacher you got"

Demos rules are pretty lax. He isn't a very strict parent, nor does he wish to be. He only hopes that you'll tell him when something's wrong. If he found out you were hiding a dark secret from him he'd feel utterly destroyed as he wondered what he could have done wrong for you not to trust him. Other than that (and maybe killing people and causing unneeded chaos and destruction with your chemistry skills) he kinda just lets you do what you want.

"Now listen, yeh can't be doing those dangerous experiments at school"

"But whyyyyy. They're cool!"

"Aye, they are. But the school don think so. If ya wanna show off yer skills your welcome'a invite some friends over"

"Really?!?!"

"Course!"

Even when he does have to punish you (mostly because his mom put him up to it) he's still pretty hands-off. He might send you to your room or take away some activity you enjoy, but it won't last very long. He prefers to talk it out and once you two reach an understanding he relents on whatever the punishment was.

"Yeh know why yeh can't do that anymore dontcha?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry...can I have my chemistry now?"

"...aye, yeh can have it back"

"Yay!"

Chances are you'll never realize the true extent of Demos care even as you grow older. He kept most of his violence away from you and he never put too much of a damper on your freedom. He taught you what you needed and let you explore the world. You'll likely never know. He would like to keep it that way.

"Dad?"

"Hm?"

"I'm glad I got left here with you...I couldn't have asked for a better Dad."

"*fully tearing up* yer gonna make me cry"

The older you get the more he wishes he could turn back time, just to watch you grow up again. So when you finally leave he needs to hold himself back from begging you to stay. He knows it's normal for kids to grow up and leave, this is a part of life. But he almost can't bear it. He will break down in tears when you go and will give you the biggest bear hug of your life. After you're gone he slowly spirals as he takes up heavy drinking again and begins to gain weight. In other words, your absence leaves him completely depressed, but he will never let you know that. Every time he sees you it's like it all disappears and it's back to his joyful self until you leave again.

'Why couldn't yeh have stayed? The world donnae make sense without yeh! Me sweet lit'le chridhe...I hope yeh miss me..."

There was never a moment you weren't on his mind

[rattyoakenbitch]

youtubers: “don’t touch her” ₊˚ ⸝  corpse husband x reader

❝i don't wanna think about, think about you. drink up, drink up i'm so fucked up, all i want is you.❞

gif credit: n/a song: lykke li - sex money feelings die

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥

pairings: corpse husband x reader

warnings: angst, cursing, drinking, smoking, violent language, and minor mentions of anxiety.

summary: i can’t make summaries rn hhh just read it (:

“Sean, there is no way in hell I’m going!”

“Oh, come on, Y/N. It’ll be fun!”

“That’s what you always say!”

“Ugh, you and Corpse are so stubborn. At least I was able to convince him to show up! You know what you need? To get out of the house more often and come hang with us.”

“Uh huh, yeah, y’all have fun, I got some stuff to finish.”

“Yeah? Like what? Your ten hour nap?”

“HEY! Excuse me -”

“7PM, [club address], you’re showing up.”

“Sean - !”

With that, Sean hung up. You let out an exasperated huff, crossing your arms and pouting like a toddler who was just denied a toy. You were invited, or more accurrately forced to celebrate whatever the hell Sean and his friends achieved. With lives like theirs, it seemed like there was always something to celebrate. 

You, on the other hand.. Well, you were just little old you. You met Sean by mere chance. It’s a very long story, but you shared some things in common, like your love for video games. However, that was about the only thing you could relate to with Sean and his little friend circle. You were more passionate about writing, as well as reading short horror stories. 

Now, that’s where you clicked with Corpse Husband. 

He was an underrated YouTuber, whose main uploads were narration videos on creepypastas and horror stories. That’s until he blew up with his Among Us gameplays, collaborating with big names like PewDiePie, Jacksepticeye, and CrankGamePlays (EEF!!!).

You met over an Among Us stream with said YouTubers and immediately hit it off. You shared a dark sense of humor, love for horror, and music. You knew of Corpse before, but only then did you discover that he produced music, which you absolutely enjoyed (and blasted in your house for days on end).

When you found out you lived not even twenty minutes away from each other, you’d occasionally meet up, mostly at his house considering he only went out once in a blue moon. You’d sometimes even spend the night at his place, staying up late, gazing up at the stars, getting deep into conversation and opening up about things you never blurted out to people. But when you were with Corpse, everything just came naturally. You felt safe with him, and hopefully, he felt the same. 

Night approached, the clock striking 5PM. You figured you’d get ready since Sean was dead set on you coming to the party. You showered, did a minimalist glossy makeup look, and chose an outfit, which consisted of a half neon green and black skirt that stopped mid thigh, and an oversized distressed band tee which you tucked into your belt. You slipped on a pair of ripped, striped thigh-highs with mismatched colors, (white stripes on one and neon blue on the other), and your platform boots that made you look like a Bratz Doll. You didn’t bother with your tangled hair. You teased it with a brush but didn’t put any effort into styling it, since it’d get messy anyways. To finish your look, you clipped on a choker and dangled a couple of layered chains around your neck.

Corpse would tease you, saying you had a “dog collar”, but you knew he secretly liked it.

All dolled up and ready to go, you hopped into your car and followed the GPS to the address Sean sent you. Drunk couples stumbled out of the club, dates headed inside, and old wasted guys were thrown out. Oh boy, you were not ready for this.

You were the anxious, anti social type. Not because it was edgy or cool, but you simply didn’t know how to handle social situations. However, it comforted you to know Corpse would be there by your side so you didn’t need to chat and flirt with strangers. 

It’s not like you wanted to meet anybody new, anyways. Though nobody was aware of it, you had feelings for Corpse. Cliche, right? You knew you shouldn’t have, but you developed feelings for him. It made you feel strange and weird, considering you haven’t caught feelings in a while.

You came up with the bright idea of slowly drifting away from Corpse to maybe help de-escalate these feelings, but you were going to run into him at the club, so what the heck.

You headed inside, your eyes scanning the crowd and pushing through, searching for your friend group. You spent a couple minutes cluelessly looking around the club, but to no avail. Then, it was as if a light bulb clicked on over your head; you never thought to phone Sean.

“Ugh, I’m so stupid.” You reached into your purse to get ahold of your phone when a pair of strong, manly hands and cold metal which you assumed to be rings wrapped around your shoulders, gripping you tightly. 

“Boo!” 

You felt your heart stop and ran out of the man’s grasp, spinning around to look at who it was.

“Oh, did I scare you?” 

The man’s deep, monotone voice rumbled above the sound of the music and shouts. Then you recognized that unique and distinctive voice. 

“Corpse!! What the hell?”

His nose and jaw was covered by a black mask, with a print that looked like Frank from Donnie Darko, which was also Corpse’s signature look, seen in his channel art. 

Despite Corpse being a faceless YouTuber, only very few people have seen his face, including you and Glam&Gore who he featured in his narration videos. You thought he was very handsome, his baritone voice matching his appearance. You had to admit, you were a little disappointed he chose to wear a mask. You loved seeing his facial expressions, especially his precious smile that would light up the room when he’d let out little fits of laughter. But you got over it and respected the fact that he wanted to remain anonymous.

“You dickhead,” you scoffed, smacking Corpse lightly on the shoulder. Corpse towered over you, looking admittedly both intimidating and seductive. If you were a stranger, you’d probably be running off, but you weren’t scared of Corpse. He was a big softie and a teddy bear.

Corpse chuckled lowly, slinging his arm over your shoulder and leading you to Sean’s group. He was protective like that, even if you were just friends. Now you could see why Sean, at one point, speculated that you and Corpse had a thing going on. 

“So, Sean forced you to tag along, too?”

“Pfft, yeah, that’s Sean for you.”

“Hey, there’s my favorite couple,” Sean joked, patting your shoulder. You rolled your eyes at his drunk antics.

“Shut up, don’t make me choke you like I hate you,” you mocked in return, eliciting a fit of laughter from the group. 

“Remind me to never hang out with you losers again,” Corpse mumbled sarcastically under his breath.

The night went by in a flash. Sean, Thomas, Felix, and everyone else was blackout drunk. Luckily, Mark was there to assist them. Since Mark couldn’t drink, he would be the designated driver that night. Corpse hung out by himself, sometimes getting approached by women who he politely turned down.

You, on the other hand, were downing alcohol like your life depended on it. For you, it would take more than the average number of drinks for you to get wasted.

“Y/N, don’t you think you should slow down?” Corpse questioned cautiously, resting a hand on the small of your back.

“Does it really look like I’m thinking right now?” you drunkenly slurred, following with a giggle. You waved to the bartender, calling for another shot, which he slid over to you, but not without hesitating after noticing your state. You pushed Corpse off of you, probably more harshly than you intended, and took the shot. 

“Okay, Y/N, fuck this, I’m taking you to my place. We can’t stay here and you certainly can’t drive back home when you’re drunk,” Corpse scowled, stepping closer to you. Again, you shoved him back.

“No.. No..” You sighed, holding your pounding head in your hand. “Don’t do that.”

“Do what? Y/N, you’re drunk -”

“I’m not letting you of all people take me.”

Corpse blinked. “What does that mean?” He knew you were drunk, of course, and you were probably just blurting nonsense.

All of a sudden, tears escaped your eyes, racing down your blushy cheeks.

“No.. I’m so sorry. It’s my fault.” You began to shake and tremble as tears started to uncontrollably spill down your face. Corpse didn’t waste another second to take you in his arms, hushing you. “Your hugs are so warm.. I hate it. I hate feeling this way. It’s all my fault.”

“What did you do, sweetheart? You can tell me.”

Your heart ached when you heard his pet name for you.

“I think I may like you more than you like me.. I-I didn’t mean to! Please don’t leave me. You’re all I have,” you sobbed into his white tee, clinging onto him. “I love you so fucking much, it hurts. I shouldn’t have!”

Corpse stopped for a moment, processing your words.

You.. felt the same?

Corpse had to tell you. You were drunk, but he needed you to know. 

“Y/N, I -”

Suddenly, you had a moment of clarity. Realizing how close you were to Corpse, you backed away, wiping away the mascara tears under your eyes.

“I - I think I had too much to drink.. I just need a smoke..” 

Without giving Corpse the chance to protest, you ran off into the crowd, struggling your way through. 

Corpse began to get worried when you didn’t come back. He waited impatiently on the barstool where you left him, anxiously playing with his rings.

He was just about to get up and look for you, when he caught a glimpse of you stumbling out the exit with another man who guided you, gripping your arm tightly.

Corpse fumed, his face going red and heartbeat speeding up. He went after you, knowing damn well you didn’t know this man. 

The man took you to his car, placing you atop the trunk, your legs dangling over the edge. He stepped in between your legs, caressing your face. Everything was a blur. If your mind was clear, you wouldn’t be stupid enough to trust this random guy, who was probably ten years older than you. 

“You’re too pretty to be crying,” he whispered, leaning in closer to your face, until a yell stopped him from proceeding any further.

“Hey, asshole, she’s drunk! Don’t you fucking touch her!”

“C-Corpse?” You hiccuped, hopping off the trunk to get a look at the approaching figure. It was indeed Corpse. His eyebrows were pressed together angrily at the sight.

“You know this dude?” the man said loudly and smugly, just to get a reaction from Corpse. “Relax, my man, I’m just tryna take this pretty girl home.”

“Well this pretty girl happens to be mine, and I won’t let you take advantage of her,” Corpse growled. 

You stood by the stranger, clinging to him as you watched Corpse’s face twist into an expression of heartbreak when you didn’t budge. He then noticed the bruises around your arms and wrist, supposedly from the man’s strong grip. He was unbelievably furious. 

“Ha, doesn’t look like she’s your girl anymore.” The man’s lips twisted upwards into a devilish smirk, only pissing Corpse off some more. Oh boy, was he ready to snap. He reached into his pocket, when..

“Wait,” you managed to slur out, breaking up the argument. You reached out towards Corpse like a child. His facial expression immediately softened. He gave you a loving smile and immediately took you into his arms, holding you protectively. 

“Now, I suggest you get in your car and never come back,” Corpse threatened.

“Oh, yeah? Or what? I’ll kill you and take your girl, you motherfucker!”

Without hesitation, Corpse took out his switchblade, looking the man in his eyes.

“Say that again?”

You watched as the stranger’s whole tough act fell apart. Without another word, he ran to the driver’s side of his car, fumbling with his keys. 

“Yeah, that’s right,” Corpse mumbled, not taking his eyes off the man until he reached his own car. You held his hand the whole way, processing what had just happened. Corpse noticed your distant expression. You got into his car, shutting the door and slumping back into your seat. He tore off his mask, taking in deep breaths to calm himself. Then he looked back to you. 

“Princess?”

You looked to Corpse, your eyes teary. “Hey, Corpse.” You didn’t seem to be as drunk, your mind a lot clearer after the incident. “D-Did you mean anything you said back there? About the..”

“About you being my girl?” 

Corpse took your hand in his, squeezing it comfortingly. He leaned forward and cupped your face with his free hand. “Absolutely.” 

With that, you leaned towards him, hesitantly pressing your lips to his. Your lips tasted of alcohol, but Corpse didn’t care. He was admittedly taken back, his breath hitching, but he released the tension from his body and kissed you back, pulling you over to the driver’s seat atop him. There wasn’t much space, forcing you to press closer to Corpse, deepening the kiss. 

Still being a bit drunk, you were clumsy and kind of ‘out of it’. 

“I’d hold onto something if I were you,” Corpse mumbled, breaking the kiss momentarily to guide your hands to grip his shoulders. But you were impatient and reconnected your lips with his, no doubt causing him to blush even more than he already was.

You couldn’t help yourself and giggled into the kiss, causing Corpse to chuckle along with you, departing from the kiss again and resting his forehead against yours.

“I’m sorry, you’re just so fucking adorable when you giggle.” 

You hummed in response, offering Corpse an innocent grin as you pecked all over his face. 

“I’m so glad you’re mine.”

[skiller0dani]

Bad Girl| Ethan Nestor

MASTERLIST YouTube Masterlist

smut requested requests info

hey guys it's been a while! Got this amazing request recently and I had to write it asap. love you all xx

Ethan didn't have many rules for you, but the most important one by far was to not bother him while he's streaming.

With the two of you keeping your relationship a secret there's just too much that can go wrong. He's live so if you came into the room, people could hear, rumors could start. More than anything Ethan wants to protect you so you coming into his recording room while he's streaming is completely out of the question. Normally you respected this rule without question, it was his YouTube channel after all, so he got to call the shots. More than that however, Ethan called the shots in other aspects of your life.

When it came to the sex, he called the shots in that too. But you always did what he said, and frankly, you felt like being a bad girl.

All day you've needed him, from the very second you woke up and the gentle morning sex he'd provided wasn't nearly enough to satiate you. You still felt that uncomfortable throbbing from between your thighs, and it lingered for most of the day. Any attempt you made to get his cock resulted in a soft kiss on the head and a "sorry baby I'm too busy today."

You laid back on the couch, irked to all hell. How could Ethan not see that he was depriving you? You pushed the heel of your hands into your eyes and groaned, your pussy was damp and aching and there wasn't a damn thing you could do about it. Spencer sat happily at your feet chewing on a squeaky bone. At least one of you was happy.

You heard Ethan laugh from inside his recording room, he was currently streaming Among Us. You feel so frustrated you want to cry and when you glance at the clock you feel like crying all over again. It's only 1:30, and Ethan is only 20 minutes into his stream. Meaning at this rate Ethan won't be able to help you until later tonight. You whined to yourself, snaking your hand under the sleep shorts you were wearing. Your fingers found your clit and you began to rub small circles just like Ethan does. It does little to nothing to relieve the pounding in your core. Only Ethan can.

You stand from your spot on the couch to go grab a bottle of water, hoping that some cold water will help calm you down. You lean against the counter, sipping at the cold water when you remember the night before. Ethan had come home from filming with someone he doesn't know very well. The recording session was frustrating and he hadn't gotten any good footage, meaning the entire day was a giant waste of time. By the time Ethan had gotten back to the house he was beyond frustrated and the first thing he did was bend you over the kitchen counter and slam into you mercilessly. You feel a shudder run down your spine at the memory and you groan softly in annoyance. You're not going to survive the day like this.

You went upstairs and into your shared room with Ethan and sat on the edge of the bed, you're always such a good girl. You followed every rule and every command without too much complaint. And today Ethan told you to wait. His rule today was to be a good girl and wait for his cock until that night. But damnit you're so turned on right now you feel like you're going to combust into flames.

You don't want to be a good girl today. You feel like breaking the rules.

With a smirk you stand from the bed and creep down the hallway, nearing his recording room. Once you're stood outside the door you feel a rush of adrenaline rush through you, you've never broken this rule before. In all 12 months of your relationship with Ethan, you've never interrupted him while he's live streaming. You almost turn back but when you hear Ethan groan in annoyance it sends tingles down your spine and a fresh wave of arousal dampening your panties. Gritting your teeth you quietly open the door and watch as Ethan's surprised eyes flicker to you for a second.

You bite your lip and sink to the floor, luckily Ethan's desk doesn't have a back so you easily crawl underneath it.

Being careful not to bump the desk you slowly crawl in between Ethan's legs, and he instinctively spreads his legs wider for you. When he glances back down at you, you feel heat rush through your entire body at the angry look in his eyes. He raises a warning brow before turning back to the game and for a second you consider leaving, but the pulsing from between your legs stops you. You bite your lip and reach forward, carefully unbuttoning Ethan’s jeans and slowly pulling his zipper down. 

Ethan tenses, his heart hammering in his chest as he does his best to act natural. This isn’t a regular video, he can’t edit anything out. This is being broadcasted live to nearly a million people. When he feels your dainty hands reaching into his jeans he sucks in a breath through his teeth. 

“Ethan you okay?” Bob asks, unfortunately for Ethan they decided to play Among Us with proximity chat on. Ethan clears his throat, “yeah stubbed my toe.” He lies but he knows it doesn’t sound very convincing. 

You wrap your hand around his hardening cock and you nearly moan when you finally free it from his jeans. The sight of it makes you even more wet then you were before, it’s hard and precumming. It’s beautiful. You lean forward instantly and wrap your lips around the head, sucking softly. Ethan clenches his jaw as he focuses all of his attention on the game in front of him. He keeps his eyes firmly on the screen because he knows if he looks at you it’s game over. Ethan would end the stream and have you bent over this desk in less than 30 seconds if he saw the beautiful sight happening under the desk. 

You keep your lips wrapped around him as you suddenly take all of him in your mouth. Ethan gasps softly in surprise, and this is when he notices the comments on his stream. 

Ethan flashes a smile to the camera, doing his best to pretend he doesn’t notice that every single comment is about him and not about the game. Embarrassment floods through Ethan’s body as he keeps his eyes on his monitor. You continue to slide him down your throat, and Ethan’s eyes briefly flutter shut. When one comment pops up, Ethan panics. 

what’s wrong Ethan???  he looks like he’s in pain  someone should tell the other people on the stream bc ethan does not look okay right now ethan are you okay? 

Shit. Ethan continues to ignore the comments, when did his fan base become little detectives? You bob your head down the full length of his cock, taking him into your mouth fully. It’s becoming increasingly harder to keep the sounds quiet so that nobody notices. When you swallow around him Ethan groans softly, “fuck.” 

does eef have a girl over?? ;)  omg ethan’s totally getting sucked off rn ngl ethan looks super fucking hot 

“Ethan?” This time it’s Mark. You pull off Ethan and smirk as you pump his cock with your hand. The arousal is coating your thighs at this point and you nearly moan out loud just thinking about what Ethan is going to do to you after this. 

“Ethan I’m getting some pretty interesting comments on my stream about you,” Jack says with a teasing tone to his voice. Ethan remains quiet, he doesn’t trust himself to say anything casually. “Got some company Ethan?” Jack says causing a chorus of laughter to ensue afterwards while everyone waits for another round to start. “His silence is...suspicious.” Steven adds through the laughter. 

Unable to focus any longer, Ethan releases a breath he’d been holding as he finally glances down at you. The sight before him stops him cold, you’re sitting on your knees with his cock in your mouth. Your breasts are spilling from the tight tank top you’re wearing and he can see the damp spot forming on the crotch of your shorts. His pupils blow wide as he quickly ends the stream and turns off the camera. The second he’s sure everything is shut off he pushes back from the desk and yanks you to your feet. 

“You think that was funny?” Ethan growls when he sees the smirk on your face. In an instant Ethan has you pulled over his lap, “you think it was funny to suck my cock when I was live? I can’t cover any of that up baby.” Ethan says, his voice low as his hands find the waistband of your shorts. 

“I need you.” You whined as he yanked your shorts down. Ethan hummed in satisfaction once he sees your glistening pussy. “Yes I can see that.” He hums, spreading your lips apart so he can look at you better. 

“I just fucked you this morning baby girl, you couldn’t wait? I’m pretty sure I told you to wait until tonight.” He says, the dominance beginning to seep into his tone. You moaned in delight when you feel Ethan spank you hard. “I couldn’t wait Ethan, I needed you now.” You explain, with a pout on your face. 

“Now all my friends know what a dirty girl you are, and now so do all my fans as well. We aren’t going to be a secret anymore baby, you just outed us.” Ethan explains, his fingertips brushing through your folds. You whine desperately as you try to grind back into his hand, but he pulls away. “It was time baby, oh my god Ethan please just fuck me please.” You plead shamelessly. 

Ethan continues to rub the globes of your ass as you moan and wriggle in his lap, “hm I’m not sure you deserve it now baby. You didn’t listen to me, I’m not sure you deserve my cock anymore.” He says, a small smirk on his face when he sees the look of pure desperation cross onto your face. “No Ethan please, I’ll listen now. I-I will I promise baby!” Ethan taps on your hip, signaling you to stand. Once your stood in front of him you moan again, you’ve never seen him look sexier then he does right now. 

His hair is messy and his chest his heaving, but the best part is between his legs. His cock is hard and his legs are spread wide, and the heated look Ethan is giving you makes you want to melt into the floor. “Go wait for me in our room.” Is all Ethan says, and you immediately scramble out of the room and down to hall to yours and Ethan’s bedroom. You sit on the bed and anxiously wait for him, your entire body buzzing in anticipation. When 10 agonizing minutes pass Ethan finally opens the door, his jeans still opened. “I’ve thought of a fitting punishment for you Princess.” 

Ethan walks to his side of the bed before sitting down, pulling you to stand in front of him. “Since you don’t seem to like my rules, why don’t you be in charge then baby?” Your heart sinks, and you immediately shake your head. 

“But I love it when you’re in control, I love following your rules.” You argue but Ethan shakes his head with a teasing smile on his face. 

“I seem to have lost my authority, you don’t listen to me anymore baby. So you try being in charge, tell me what to do.” Ethan reaches forward and yanks you towards him. You fall against his chest, your lips a hairs length from him, “boss me around.” He whispers and you swallow a thick lump in your throat. You stand again, feeling anxious and unsure of what to do. Normally Ethan tells you what to do, but he just relinquished all control to you and you already hate it. 

Ethan watches with knowing eyes, he knows already that you have no idea what to do. “Well? What do you want me to do baby?” Ethan asks, watching the blush crawl up your neck and tint the edges of your ears. You tremble, “um...I-” you feel your throat close as tears well in your eyes. In a second Ethan is pulling you into his arms, smoothing your hair down and pressing kisses to your head. You melt into his embrace while he mumbles loving words into your hair. “I’m sorry baby I didn’t mean to upset you.” Ethan whispers, pressing soft kisses to your head. 

“Is that how you felt on the stream? Embarrassed?” You ask hesitantly and to your dismay, Ethan nods. 

“Kinda, but it’s okay baby.” You lean up to press a kiss to his lips. 

“I’ve learned my lesson, I promise. I know why you make those rules now.” You say softly and Ethan brushes hair out of your face with a small smile. “Can you be in charge again?” Instead of answering Ethan flashes you a smile before pressing a kiss to your forehead. 

“Lay down baby.” In an instant the heat floods through your body again as you scramble to lay down on the bed. Ethan stands and swiftly yanks his shirt over his head, and motions for you to do the same. Sitting up you quickly pull your shirt off, watching as Ethan kicks his jeans and boxers off as well. Ethan hovers over you, and you feel his cock nudging at your entrance and in an instant you spread your legs wider for him. Ethan slides just the head of his cock into you and he stills. You wriggle your hips, “Ethan please,” You beg in a gasp. 

Cupping your cheeks, Ethan turns your head to look him in the eyes. “No more bothering me while I’m live got it?” He says and you nod instantaneously. With one sharp thrust, Ethan slides the rest of the way in and both of you release a moan. Pressing his lips to yours he begins to thrust into you and you feel the heat building already. You wrap your legs around him, locking your ankles behind his back as he slowly picks up speed. Ethan pulls out, “bend over.” He gasps and you move to bend over the bed, already missing the stretch his cock provided. As soon as you’re bent over in front of him, Ethan grasps your hips and thrusts back into you. 

Your face is pressed into the bed as you cry out softly, Ethan slamming into you again and again. “Fucking took my dick in your mouth in front of the entire world, you’re lucky they only saw me. If anyone else saw how beautiful you look with a cock in your mouth I think I’d lose my mind.” Ethan growls and you can only moan in response as your fists twist the sheets in your hands. You feel the coil in your abdomen winding tighter and tighter and when Ethan reaches around your body to softly pinch your clit you’re crying out and convulsing around him, leading him to his orgasm as well. You collapse against the bed and Ethan rubs a hand up and down your back before gently pulling out with a wince. 

He helps you into bed and lays down next to you, pulling your bare body against his chest. “I’m sorry I embarrassed you.” You say softly, but Ethan merely presses a kiss to your lips. 

“Only a little, I couldn’t be bothered too much I mean you were sucking my dick. Doesn’t get better than that.” Ethan shrugs, causing you to blush. You sit up when Ethan stands from the bed, reaching around for his clothes. 

“Now if your unusually high sex drive has been fully satisfied, I have some explaining to do.” Ethan teases, causing you to giggle. With a kiss to your sweaty forehead Ethan is exiting the room, and you lay back against the bed with the widest smile stretched across your face. 

[corpsehusband-simp]

Date Night

Request: Could you do a cute Eef fluff, where he and the fem!Reader have been dating for a while, and after shes had a stressful week, he prepares a cute Lil date inside with lotss of fluff? -🌱⭐

A/N: Woah two in one night? Im on a roll tonight! I hope you guys enjoyed this, this is one of my favorites so far.

Warnings: Panic Attack.

Masterlist

You sit against the wall in a bathroom stall and cover your mouth trying to quiet your sobs. You were currently at some fancy Office space trying to get a brand deal secured when you started having a panic attack. The brand deal was about to slip through your fingers if you couldn’t calm down and that was only making you panic more. This was the cherry on top of the shitty week Sunday you were having. 

“Siri call baby eef” You tried to keep your voice steady but it failed as you cried.

“Calling baby eef” The phone only rang three times before he answered.

“Hi, baby, why are you calling don’t you have your meeting in a few minutes?”

“I can’t do it, Ethan, I cant.” You could hear Ethan sitting you, he must have been slouching in his chair while editing.

“Hey hey hey. Baby girl listen to me. You got this. You are one of the most amazing people I have ever met. You are loving, caring, and put your heart and soul into everything you do. This company will lucky to have you. You are going to crush this meeting Y/N.” You sniffle and take in a shaky breath.

“Are you sure?” He chuckles a little.

“I am positive princess. Now wipe your cheek, pick up your chin and go crush this meeting baby. I Love you.” 

“I love you Ethan” You end the call and do as he says, standing up, wiping your cheeks, and lifting up your chin. “I got this. I deserve this brand deal.”

An hour later you walk out of the office with your chin up until you get to your car. Once in you do a happy dance. 

“Siri call Baby eef!” It rang a few times before Ethan answered.

“Hey, baby how did it go?” His voice was weary, prepared for the worst outcome.

“I got it Ethan! I did it! I got the Brand deal!” He lets out a sigh of relief.

“I knew you would baby.”

“Thank you for always believing in me baby. I’m gonna start driving home ill see you in like 30 minutes.” Ethan hums.

“Of course baby.”

You let out a sigh of relief as you pulled into the driveway of yours and Ethan’s house. Walking in you kicked off your shoes, set down your bag, and tossed your keys on the table before, making your way into the house. 

“Lucy I’m home!” You call walking into the living room only to stop in your tracks. The curtains were drawn, fairy lights were hung up, a pillow fort was made and the tv was on. “Ethan…?” Your voice was a quiet whisper. Two arms wrapped around your waist pulling your back against Ethan’s chest.

“Welcome home my love. I figured after the week you’ve had you deserved to be taken care of.” He placed a soft kiss in the crook of your neck. “Why don’t you go change into something comfortable and then meet me in the pillow fort.” You turn around and wrap your arms around Ethan’s neck before kissing his lips.

“Thank you baby, for all of this, for being my rock.” Ethan lays his forehead against yours and you both close your eyes.

“I will always be your rock baby.”

“And I will always be yours.” You give him another kiss before running upstairs and changing into your PJs. You run back downstairs and crawl into the fort.

“I’ve got all your favorite snacks, popcorn, your favorite drinks, and I got us take out from our favorite place.” You look at him with tears in your eyes as you crawl over to Ethan laying in his lap.

“You did all of this in an hour?” He shakes his head.

“Yes and no. I’ve been planning it since yesterday but I got it all set up when you left for the meeting.” you look up and kiss his jaw.

“You can pick the movie.” He snorts.

“Baby I was gonna pick the movie anyway.” You both stick your tongues out at each other before getting comfortable and starting your night of cuddles and movies.

[straighttohellbuddy]

📓 !!

Okay im so excited please know I think about How The Light Gets In's world every day still, and so anyways here is a side story I want to write but there's a lot of set up regarding the reader and eef becoming friends again. For context, they were incredibly close around 2014-2017, but people were getting creepy and invasive and demanding about their friendship (think 2012 toxic side of the Phandom, if that makes sense), and a lot of the reader's relationships were strained at that time because while they had been successful before, they were absolutely blowing up after their first album released and they became far more mainstream. They felt like they were bothering the people they had become closest to, both because they're worried that they're a bother, and because gossip rags and paps would harrass their friends looking for a scoop, and so they ended up just completely cutting off contact without warning one day right before they went on their first tour. the start of HTLGI is about 3 years since they'd been in proper contact with any of the creators they were close to at that time.

DON'T LOOK AT ME on their 2017 ep Hyperfocus was a more general song in response to everything that had been happening in their life around that time, with a focus on how they stop associating with anyone for a while, without outright addressing it, but on their latest album n o s t a l g i a, read at 5am ft. Troye was specifically written at the start of quarantine, when the reader was getting back into YouTube, about their feelings regarding how their friendship with ethan ended, as they spent a lot of this time looking back of their YouTube career, and he was the person they were closest to for a very long time, before they iced everyone out.

OKAY SO THERES MORE OF THE BACKGROUND OF THE WHOLE FIC AND THE READER BUT

Werewolf Ethan & Mark. I'm sorry I don't make the rules. They have golden retriever energy you cannot change my mind. But also because this is the HTLGI you know that supernatural characteristics are able to be activated rather than just triggered by the full moon. What I'm trying to say is since this is set in the year of Unus Annus, they film a video together that's like, you know that show where a person has to try and outwit a professional tracker? Except its the reader being tracked by two werewolves at night in a national park. Reader is wearing some sort of night vision camera on themselves so whenever it cuts to them the audience can't actually see how they're using their powers, if that makes sense.

Also the reader agreed to this knowing it would probably be when they ended up telling Mark and Ethan about them being a demon.

Video is titled Hunting Down An Old Friend

A few Moments that the boys edit out:

The reader using their stupidly sharp prehensile tail to swing from tree branches, though they leave in shots where the reader's tail can't be seen.

Knowing that with the werewolves having advanced hearing, the reader would give themselves away by talking to the camera, they take a few minutes having flown up to a high tree branch, to pull out a notebook and do a little sketch of how Mark and Ethan appear in their Demon True Sight, and holding it up to their camera.

Werewolves being one of the animals who can kind of sense demons without being able to identify them, essentially like dogs can sense natural disasters and are often good judges of character, this can be heightened on command for werewolves. There's about 15 minutes of footage cut out of the boys discussing or mentioning how this place has awful vibes and that they should have done this during the day. It gets worse as they get closer to the reader, who didn't realise that the boys hadn't thought to ever use that particular power around them before.

("I say this with so much love and appreciation for you, dude," Ethan yells, looking up at you from the base of the tree they'd finally found you in, "but I- this is making me anxious I feel like something terrible's gonna happen, and we should probably get out of here and film the rest of the video back at Mark's." And behind him, Mark's nodding, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, eyes scanning the trees for whatever was most likely the cause of this terrible impending doom.

Oh. It's you. And they don't know its you.

Now or never, you suppose.

"Can you cut the cameras for a second? You're going to be fine I promise," you called back, and though they obligingly did, they both seemed antsy. You cleared your throat awkwardly, "that... that terrible feeling, that's not the park or anything in it- well I mean, it is, but it's just- it's me."

and later

"Dude your wings smell like rotten eggs."

"To YOU Ethan! And no they don't!"

"If it makes you feel better they smell like burning and rotten eggs."

"It does not."

(for reference, when enhancing their sense of smell werewolves can kind of distinguish various supernatural creatures, or parts of supernatural creatures. Some creatures have an inherent scent, but some, like angels and demons, only have distinct scents when they've activated certain attributesor abilities; demon wings smell like fire and brimstone, which unfortunately means burning and rotten eggs. I like to think angels wings are like the love potion in Harry Potter that smells like the things you love the most. Mark and Ethan usually don't enhance it around each other because they smell like wet dog to the other)

This gets about 2k notes on tumblr. The reader likes it:

Ethan finally finding Y/N at the end of Hunting Down An Old Friend (2020) Colourised.

Other things to note regarding all this:

It takes a while to rebuild their friendship to the point where they're comfortable enough to be on camera together (eef and reader specifically).

However, the Unus Annus video is the first thing they properly do together, and the reader, in an effort to connect more and make up for the past, will join in multiplayer gaming streams if asked.

Impromptu duet in proximity Among Us of Young Volcanoes by Fall Out Boy, which has their respective chats and fandoms losing their minds, except it stops abruptly after the first chorus as they both remember the opening lines of the second verse (make it easy, say I never mattered -- those lyrics hit a little too close to home)

But also the reader convinces him to join him for a proper cover in like, February of 2021, and it's something deeply sappy (I'm thinking Bon Iver by mxmtoon because I think its sweet and fits them well)

Also Ethan being reminded that the reader is kind of a much bigger deal than when they'd been friends before.

designed to hurt (touch me) from their ep Working On It is nominated for a Grammy for Track of the Year, and n o s t a l g i a wins Best Pop Album (because it's my fic and I said so)

FIRST OF ALL designed to hurt (touch me) is a beautifully produced song about Corpse (which people do not know) and the title itself is literally making fun of something he said IMAGINE his reaction to it being Grammy Nominated 😂😂😂 God he'd be proud but lowkey fuming, meanwhile the moment the nominations are announced the reader tweets:

me: here is an album where I processed my entire world view including heartfelt explorations of the trauma of existing and oversharing in the public eye from a young age without the traditional barrier between audience and entertainer

the grammys: that's cute BUT you know the song you wrote to bully your boyfriend and also be horny on main for him before you guys were even dating? THAT deserves its own recognition.

meanwhile Ethan's like..... this is the same person who I filmed a video with playing cards against humanity, and you laughed so hard you almost threw up. I am very proud but deeply confused.

The Hot Meme of Late April 2021 is "2 time Grammy Award Winning Artist Y/N" with a gif, still, or quote from the reader where they're just being an absolute chaos gremlin.

Of course we have "If I bleached my asshole for charity I'd do it tastefully."

2 Time Grammy Award Winning Artist Y/N speaking to their actual boyfriend in the year of our lord 2020: You are being executed for Clown Crimes.

ethan posts a short video to twitter simply of his screen where he's renaming a folder from "Never Before Seen Images of Grammy Award Winning Artist Y/N" simply changing it to 2 time Artist. The reader responds specifically to his tweet with a video of themselves asking Google how to hard reset someone else's computer.

So many screenshots from old videos surface that week.

I miss this world. Sorry this is rambly!!

[vas-happenin-team]

my personal thoughts and experiences from Unus Annus, be warned this is long...

i apologize now if this is messy I am trying to get my thoughts in order so this is probably going to be ramble-y... One Year. There is so much that can change in one year and so many opportunities that pass us by and almost just as many regrets. And I am so glad I didn't let Unus Annus pass me by, even though it almost did. When i think of the past year I can't say that this was the year that I hope for but I definitely think this was the year I needed A a former friend of mine (who is a a HUGE Markiplier fan) tried to show me Unus Annus back in December. I think they showed me a couple videos but the one that stood out to me was the Escape Room video (probably for the fact that I was high, and thought Eef was very cute and very funny, but that's besides the point). I enjoyed the videos they showed me but a never really got into the channel and didn't watch anymore Unus Annus videos with them. I regret not watching more with them. At the time I knew who Markiplier was, I had watch his FNAF videos when I was younger and was subscribed. But I had no idea who Mark Fischbach as a person. And I had no idea who Crankgameplays or who Ethan Nestor was. I wasn't emotionally invested with them so I didn't really watch. A few months went by I was no longer in speaking terms with the friends who showed me the channel, the pandemic hit, I graduated college, i moved back home, i was unemployed, and incredibly lost. With graduating in May and being home all the time I spent more time on youtube. I don't remember how, but I ended back on Unus Annus again. And by July I was hooked. Not only did I began binge watching Unus Annus but I was also subscribed to Ethan, watched both his and mark’s videos, and become part of the different communities. As I am reflecting back on this time I can see how the message of Unus Annus, and  by extension Mark and Ethan, started to influence me and help me for the better. Cause I was, and still am, struggling with my mental health. While I don't want to give them all the credit, the idea of only having so much time and questioning myself on whether or not I wanted to be a passive on looker in my own life, lead me to discover just how unhappy i was. I decided to therapy and getting the help I needed. And while I am still not 100% and that the reminder that life is slipping us by and I feel like I wasting it still stresses me out and causes me anxiety. I have to remind myself that I am making progress, and while this isn't ideal, this is the best I can do at the moment. It also helps looking at both Ethan and Mark. Mark, who was around my current age, when he decided he was going to make something of himself, reminds me that it is never too late to give yourself a happy life. And Ethan, only a year older than me, is living his out his dreams currently, but that took him 8 years to get here. Ethan, who has a very similar personality to me (in fact i think our myer-briggs is the same) also reminds me that I don't have to hide the loud and silly parts of my personality and that I can find people who will accept the different parts of me and want to help me succeed. One of my favorite aspects of the show would be where they would say "Memento Mori. We will see you tomorrow." I think liked that so much because it was a concrete promise in a year of unpredictability. Because I knew for certain, that no matter what happened, I would see them tomorrow. And while we might no longer see them tomorrow when the channel ends. It still feels like a promise, because even with the channel gone, the world still turns and there is a still a tomorrow. A tomorrow where Ethan and Mark still upload on their channels. A tomorrow, even as time marches on, we will remember Unus Annus and how much it had an impact on our lives. Because one thing is for sure, we aren't all the same people we were a year before. We grew and changed and Unus Annus helped shaped a year of our lives. So while we won’t not be able to "see them tomorrow" in the future. The impact of the channel will be seen in the future by the millions of people that it had an impact on. Even in this last few months I have seen some positive changes in my own life. While I am normally a lurker in the different fandoms I am a part of. I stepped out of my comfort zone and started to interact and create more for the Unus Annus community than I had before. And I did this because of the idea of "why not, we only have a limited time" and I wanted to make my mark. While I still struggle to interact with other blogs outside a random response or anon message, I was still able to find some people in this fandom to follow and appreciate. Thank you to @johanna7290 , @heistshenanigans , @lady-raziel , @tiny-crecher , simpgameplays and so many more blogs who helped make my experience in this community even better by not just taking any moment for granted, and  really made the most of this year. Thank you as well to the blogs who have interacted with me on posts, sent anons, or even followed me. Thank you to the artist, the writers, the meme maker, the gif creators, the video editor, and the theorists for making this year even more unforgettable. 

  Finally to Ethan ( @crankgameplays), Mark (@markiplier), Amy, Evan, and all the editors and guests of the channel, thank you. Thank you for giving me something to look forward to everyday. Thank you for making something so full of love, humor, and friendship. Thank you for the laughs and the good times in a year where they were hard to come by. Thank you for the hidden codes and lore that kept us all on our toes. Thank you for challenging yourselves to go further beyond, and encouraging us to do the same. Thank you for introducing me to a community full of hilarious, smart, and caring individuals. Thank you guys for being authentic to yourselves.  Thank you for all the memories. Thank you for all the merch. Thank you for giving us a year. Unus Annus  Memento Mori ~Lexi

[spaceyshenanigans]

actually i watched the stream and what happened was eef's chat wanted to know everyone's pronouns since it had been a while since eef played with the group so everyone went around in a circle and said their pronouns and eef said "he/him, they is good too" and then went on to explain that he had a conversation with someone back home who said using they/them pronouns was weird so he decided that he would be fine using they/them pronouns to help normalize if for nonbinary people, even though he clarified that he still identified as cis.

Ah thanks! I wasn’t actually in the stream

[checkurwindow]

i’m so scared

Book: Open Heart

Warnings: It’s a lot longer than my usual fic and much angstier, but hope you enjoy it!

Rating: Teen for light swearing.

Pairing: Ethan x F!MC

Word count: 5200+ I KNOW!! It’s the single longest piece of writing I’ve ever written.

Author’s note: I’m actually really proud of this fic so please reblog and let me know what you thought of it! Here’s my masterlist for more content! I wrote a sequel to this fic too!

One

That’s how old she was when her father left. Her mother knew that he was never going to stay, but that didn’t stop her from breaking down every night for 3 months when she thought her beloved daughter had fallen asleep, when instead she lay awake, wondering what could have happened to make her mother hide her sadness every day, only letting her walls come down when she thought nobody was watching. 

She didn’t understand much beyond that, just knowing that her dear old dad had left for a pack of cigarettes and milk, but left behind only a stack of legal papers on the counter while her mother had gone off to work, desperate to give her little girl the best life she could.

Two

The number of people in her family. She and her mom, her mom and her. It was just the two of them, or at least that’s what her mother told her every time she asked. She was fine with that, she loved her mother with all her little heart. She didn’t need anybody else.

Her mom had found a job in Providence, a job that could support both of them, and an apartment that had a reasonable rent. She was scared at first, moving to a “big city”, but her mom assured her that it was a kingdom, and she was the princess. 

Three

That was the number of bracelets she had gotten for her fifth birthday. She and her mom had been walking downtown, running some errands, when they walked past a jewelry store and saw the set of three bracelets in the store window.

She had asked her mom if she could have them, even resorting to using her best puppy dog eyes in an attempt to persuade her. 

Her mom had told her that they were too expensive, and they didn’t have enough money to buy them. She was disappointed, sulking the rest of the way home.

3 weeks later, her mom returned to the jewelry store, spending almost a month's worth of her salary to buy that special set of bracelets for her daughter. She was beyond excited when she woke up on her birthday and saw that bright pink box next to her bed.

She started showing off those prized possessions of hers to all her friends at school. One was gold with a diamond charm, the other was silver with a ruby charm. The last was bronze with a deep sapphire charm. The bronze one was her favourite, even after Derek Reagan said it was ugly. She told Derek that he was ugly. 

Four

That was the grade she was in when she met him.

It was a usual Monday, she was rushing through some unfinished homework when Mr Kingston, her teacher entered, accompanied by a boy who looked just a little taller than her. 

Turns out it was a new student, transferring from another school that had just closed down. He was wearing a blue button-down, a big difference from the rest of the boys in her class whose t-shirts were either dinosaurs, or cars, or superheroes. He introduced himself as Ethan Jonah Ramsey while the rest of the class stared blankly at him, before returning to their own friends. Mr Kingston assigned him to the seat next to her.

“Hi, Eefen Jonah!” She waved excitedly at him as he sat down next to her.

“My name is Ethan, Jonah is my middle name,” he corrected.

She made a small ‘o’ with her mouth, thinking for a short while before responding, “I prefer Eef,” she smiled, making him blush slightly.

She took a container out of her bag, opening it to reveal large apple slices. She took one in each hand, careful not to let them slip as she turned back towards him, offering the slice in her left hand.

He slowly took one and smiled, “thanks,” he said when he noticed the set of sparkly jewelry on her wrist, “I like your bracelets.”

Five

That’s how many people were in her friend group by middle school.

First, there was Jackie Varma. She thought Jackie was a little mean when she first met her, she always picked fights with everyone. But she soon learned that she was only mean to people she didn’t like, and she even called Derek stupid when he was mean to her. She asked Jackie if she wanted to have lunch with her after that.

Next was Sienna Trinh. She was nice to everyone, and her first friend at school. She always shared her food, usually sweet treats, with everyone in class, even when Jackie was convinced they were poisonous, she never stopped radiating her positivity.

Bryce Lahela was a flirt. And rightfully so, as every girl in her class had a crush on him. Every girl except her. Bryce was convinced he knew the reason why, and voiced his opinion every chance he got, “She doesn’t have a crush on me because she’s in love with Ramsey, that’s the only reason.”

She would always blush when he said that, which was often seeing how he and Jackie bickered daily about it. Yes, she and Ethan had been best friends since fourth grade. Yet that was all they were. Best friends, never venturing out of that sacred zone. 

And then there was Ramsey himself. He had gotten tall, very tall. He was easily the tallest of the group, while she was one of the shortest, barely taller than Sienna. He was a bit gangly and awkward, sometimes very quiet as well, but he was her best friend. 

Six

That was the day of the month Ethan was born.

He was turning fifteen, and begged his dad for money instead of his usual books. His dad thought it was strange, as reading had quickly become one of his favorite pastimes, but waved it off as typical teenager behaviour. 

A couple days before, she had lost her treasured bracelets. She had taken them off during art class, careful not to spill paint and ruined her favourite set of jewelry. She had rushed off after class because she wanted to get the cafeteria pizza while it was still fresh and hot for all her friends, and accidentally left the bracelets behind. When she came back to get them after lunch, however, they were gone. She cried for the first time in what felt like forever. 

Ethan’s dad had done what he had asked of him, giving him cash for his birthday. Upon receiving his present, he rushed up to his room and took his box of savings out from the top of his closet, almost falling off the chair he was climbing to get them. 

He hurriedly counted up all his money, adding to the amount he had been saving, ecstatic when he realised he had a little more than what he needed. He quickly ran out, wallet in hand, barely able to tell his dad that he was going out as he sprinted out the front door.

He finally made it to the jewelry store that, after much research, he knew carried the same set of bracelets as the ones his best friend had lost. The attendant asked what a young man like himself was doing buying such an expensive set of jewelry, teasing about if using all his hard-earned cash by doing extra chores was really worth it for a girl. 

He smiled widely, heart racing from the sprint over, but nodded rapidly, forking over the money he had planned to use to buy a new set of books. When he got home, he put the shiny new bracelets in a box, doing his best to wrap them in bright red wrapping paper, her favourite colour. 

At school the next day, he got in early and slipped the box into her desk drawer before she arrived. 

“Eef,” that’s what she called him when something big was happening, “you won’t believe what I found!” she squealed to him after class.

She told him all about the bracelets she found at her desk, while he smiled and nodded, telling her he was happy for her. Jackie made eye contact with him and gave him a knowing look, his eyes darting around the room when he realised, but she didn’t say a word about it after that. 

Seven

The number of med schools she applied to. They all applied to med schools. 

She applied to Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Princeton, Brown, NYU, and Johns Hopkins.

She was accepted to all of them, which was more than impressive. Her mother had never been prouder of her. 

Ethan never told her, but he applied to the same schools as her, all seven. He got into all of them except Harvard, so hoped to every powerful being up beyond the night sky that she wouldn’t accept their invitation. He wasn’t ready to lose her, not yet, maybe not ever. 

After spending countless coffee-fueled nights sorting through and weighing the pros and cons of each school, she finally decided on Johns Hopkins. Ethan did too, after he determined that they had the best professors there. At least, that’s what he told her when she asked how he decided.

Sienna, one of her closer friends in the group, was her shoulder to cry on if Ethan wasn’t around, which was rare but had happened a couple times throughout the years. Sienna decided to go to Princeton, along with her boyfriend, Wayne, or was it Dwayne? Nobody really knew as he never bothered to show up most of the time when they reluctantly invited him per Sienna’s request.

The rest of their friend group split up, each going to a different med school. They made a pact one drunken night the summer before they all headed out to med schools all across the country. 

They promised to meet up every chance they could, even if it meant driving in the middle of the night through storm and snow. Jackie insisted it was way too cheesy when Sienna half sobbed, half stated it while they sat on Bryce’s rooftop, bottles of alcohol and snacks surrounding them, but in the end, the tears made Jackie agree. 

Ethan helped her pack for college, something she assured him she could easily do herself but he insisted anyway. He helped move her things into her dorm, something he hadn’t yet done for himself but he didn’t care. They met her roommate, Grace Young, who upon first seeing them, mistakenly assumed they were dating. She quickly corrected Grace, properly introducing Ethan as her best friend. 

Eight 

That’s the number of years it took for Ethan to realise he was in love with her. 

Why it had taken him so long, he didn’t have a single clue. He should’ve realised it sooner, but now he couldn’t not see it. Ethan was completely sure he was mind-blowingly in love with her.

Why hadn’t he noticed the first day he met her, when she immediately shared her apple slices with him, making him feel welcome and accepted unlike most of the class. Sure, he had figured out long ago that she was beautiful, but he never thought it was love. 

Why hadn’t he noticed it all through middle school, when Bryce mercilessly teased the both of them about it. “Damn,” he thought, “I hate it when Bryce is right.”

And why had he not realised it in high school, when he spent all his savings he earned over countless summers to replace the bracelets that she lost? When instead of bullying her, Derek Reagan started flirting with her, which made Ethan so angry when he saw it happen, but ecstatic when she turned him down in front of the whole school, citing all the times he had bullied and picked on her. Friends don’t do that for each other. But she was more than just a friend, wasn’t she? 

Ethan should’ve known when he followed her 370 miles away from their hometown just to be at the same med school as her. Sure, it was a great school, but that wasn’t the reason he was there. He was there for her. You don’t just do that for a friend you like or even have a crush on. No, he loved her. 

It was quite ridiculous, really. How had she gotten him wrapped around her finger, and without him even realising for so many years? Ethan knew he was helpless to her charms, he would do anything she wanted him to do, he would’ve followed her to the ends of the earth if she had asked. 

But did she know? That was the thought that circled around his head during sleepless nights as he tossed and turned in his bed. Did she know how weak she made him? How helpless he was when it came to anything that had to do with her? 

He quickly decided that she couldn’t have known. She wouldn’t have let him spend all his birthday money and savings on her, let him follow her to med school, let him torture himself all these years if she knew it was all for her. 

Nine

That’s how many apartment listings she had to choose from. 

She sat in the coffee shop near the hospital reading over the listings. Now that they had started their residency, Grace had been matched with another hospital and moved in with fellow interns there. 

This one was too expensive, that one would be too loud. She had no idea which one to choose. And to add to her troubles, she had no roommate. There was no way she could find a reasonable place in downtown Boston without a roommate, it was impossible.

That’s when Ethan walked through the door, his hair combed to perfection as usual. 

“Ethan, thank god you’re here. Come help me pick out an apartment,” she pleaded, showing him pictures of all the listings.

He shrugged his jacket off as he sat down next to her, inhaling the comforting scent of hers he had grown to love over all these years that wafted through the air. 

“This one looks nice,” he pointed to one of the listings, “barely a block away from the hospital, great lighting, tons of restaurants around, and the rent would be affordable for two people.” 

“I know, it’s perfect but I can’t afford it,” Ethan frowned and looked up at her in confusion.

She let out a defeated sigh, “I haven’t found a roommate yet, and there’s no way I can afford that place all on my own,” she admitted and turned back to the other listings in search of a cheaper place, the frown still evident on her face.

“I’ll be your roommate,” he mentally cursed himself the second those words escaped from his mouth. He had just offered to be roommates with his best friend that he just happened to be hopelessly in love with. What could possibly go wrong? 

His regrets immediately ceased to exist when her face lit up, full of delight. She threw her arms around him gratefully, hugging him as tightly as she could, and he knew every single moment would be worth it for her, “thank you so much, Eef!”

Ten 

That’s the number of times he had tried to tell her. 

The first time was when she came home after a bad day. It was pouring rain outside, and she had walked in completely drenched and in a mess of tears. After many attempts on Ethan’s part to try to get her to tell him what was wrong, he eventually gave up and stuck to comforting her instead. As she cried, soaking his clothes with not only her tears but the rain her clothes and hair had absorbed on the way in, he wanted nothing more than to tell her how much he loved her.

Then there was the time she convinced him to bake a cake together on their day off. He had accidentally gotten cake batter on her nose, and she laughed as she smeared some of it across his face, which resulted in a war using their leftover ingredients still on the counter. He never thought she was more beautiful than she was right there, and was tempted to risk it all. But he never did.

The third time was over the phone, he had gone home but she was still at Edenbrook, filling in patient charts when he received a call from her.

“Hey, Ethan.”

“Hey, what’s the call for?”

Her voice was momentarily shaky on the other end, it made his heart rate go up significantly, “I just wanted to tell you...hi,” was what she said after a long pause. 

“You called just to say hi?” he laughed.

“Yeah. I gotta go now, bye,” she hung up before he had a chance to respond.

The next time was when they watched a movie. “Maybe a romantic movie would help,” he thought to himself as he loaded up The Fault In Our Stars. He was wrong. The movie only made her cry again, and he couldn’t bring himself to tell her then. 

The next time, he was determined to finally do it. He stopped by the florist on the way home, picking up a bouquet of her favourite flowers, bougainvilleas. He even rehearsed the exact words he was going to say when he professed his love to her while walking back. But he opened the door only to be met with her wearing a stunning blue sundress that left him was speechless. Only she had that effect on him. 

The sixth time was in the middle of the night, around 1 am. Ethan couldn’t sleep, his head was clouded with thoughts of her and her alone. He convinced himself he was going to tell her. Yes, he was going to march into her room and tell her. He got up to tell her, but instead heard her throwing up when he approached the door. He spent the rest of the night comforting her and making sure she was okay. 

Then he decided he couldn’t do it himself. He called up Sienna, who had long since figured out who Ethan was in love with. Sienna actually laughed when he had asked her to tell her on his behalf. She thought it was a joke. When she realised he was being serious, her lighthearted behavior dissolved, instead, she firmly told him that he had to do it himself, and promptly hung up the phone. 

Eighth time’s the charm, right? Wrong. He thought of writing a letter, “it’s easier this way,” he thought. All he had to do was write his feelings down on a piece of paper and hand her the letter, easy. He then realised that it was far too impersonal. He knew her, hell, he spent more than half his life with her. And that’s why he knew that if he ever did it, she’d want to hear it in person from him directly.

Then he tried to tell her as they walked back from Edenbrook after a long shift. It was a typical Boston day, and Ethan decided there was no time like the present to tell her. He had every intention to tell her, he really did. But she received an important phone call that she needed to take just as he was about to open his mouth. 

Finally, he decided that he had had enough. He wasn’t going to let anything come between his plans to tell her the truth for a second longer than he needed to. He planned a delightful picnic for the both of them. They headed to a nearby park that she loved on a cool but sunny day, it was a perfect day. And that was what stopped him from telling her this time. 

They were having so much fun, what if by telling her the truth, he ruined the day. What if he ruined their entire friendship, years worth of time spent together wasted and down the drain all because he was so selfish? What if she didn’t reciprocate his feelings, and that was the last good memory of her that he had? He gave up trying to tell her after that.

Eleven

That’s how many times she tried to tell him. 

The first time was immediately after she found out. It was a shocking discovery, and she was lost as to what to do with the new information. It didn’t exactly help that it had been an awful day. On her way back to the apartment, it started to rain heavily. A terrible end to a terrible day, really. When she finally made it indoors, she instantly fell into his arms. She knew she could’ve told him there, but she didn’t. 

She decided that they needed to be doing something more fun and lighthearted, so she suggested baking, and was surprised when he actually agreed. But seeing him there, covered in cake batter, who knows how much flour, and grinning at her, she wanted to keep this memory.

After feeling guilty for not telling him that day, she called him while taking a break from charts.

“Hey, Ethan,” she said, building herself up to finally tell him.

“Hey, what’s the call for?” 

Her voice quivered, the nerves building up, “I just wanted to tell you,” she decided it was too much, she’d tell him another time, “...hi.”

‘You called just to say hi?” she heard his laugh on the other end.

She closed her eyes tightly, embarrassed, “yeah. I gotta go now, bye,” she hung up as quickly as she could.

The next time she tried to tell him was during movie night, but the bastard just had to pick The Fault In Our Stars. Since when did Ethan even start voluntarily watching romantic movies anyway? And he couldn’t have picked any other movie. She spent a good part of the rest of the night cursing the tears that choked back all the words she wanted to say. 

Then she was going to tell him when he got back to the apartment. She spent so long in the bathroom practicing what she was going to say to him in the mirror. Time and time again, pacing in her favourite blue sundress to calm her nerves as she recited the words back to herself. But then he showed up with a bouquet of her favorite flowers. He had always been so sweet like that to her. She really didn’t deserve him, and she hated herself for not telling her then. 

At 1 in the morning, she felt sick to her stomach, and rushed into her bathroom. She threw up all of her dinner from hours before, no doubt looking awful while doing so. Then Ethan showed up and spent the entire night comforting her. She knew she could’ve ended her own torture right then and there, and she was planning to. Up until she fell asleep on his shoulder. 

Maybe she didn’t have to be the one to tell him? And so she drove an hour back to Providence to see her mom, seeking advice. There must’ve been a better way to tell him, a way that wouldn’t be putting her through so much agony. Her mom only hugged her tightly. She told her that she was the only one who could make the decision to tell him and wished her the best of luck.

She sat at her desk and attempted to write a letter, but how could you write someone a letter to tell them about such a subject? There was no way words on a piece of paper could explain how she felt. It wasn’t fair to Ethan, it had to be done in person.

And then there was the time they were walking back home from the hospital. She would’ve told him there, she should’ve told him there, but she didn’t. Instead, she received a phone call. She knew exactly what the call would be about even before she tapped the ‘answer’ icon.

The next was the time he set up a picnic for the both of them. It was a perfect day, it was the perfect time to tell him, but that was the moment she realised she loved him. She just wasn’t willing to stain the moment she realised she loved her best friend with her horrible news. 

Finally, there was the time she actually told him the truth. It was cold, but she asked him to go up to the rooftop with her. He agreed, and they made their way up to the empty rooftop garden. They stood in silence as they looked out at the city around them, the city lights glittering like diamonds in the dark, or shooting stars in the night sky. Ethan tried to tell her first.

“I love—”

“Ethan, I’m dying.” 

Twelve 

That’s how many months are in a year. That’s how many inches are in a foot. That’s how many signs there are in the zodiac. That’s how many days of Christmas there are.

That wasn’t how many malignant tumours she had, Ethan refused to believe it. 

Well, as he soon learned, that there were most likely more than 12 tumours in the person he grew up with, the person he loves, the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, the person who had much less than a lifetime to live. There were twelve tumours over a month ago, and she hadn’t told him.

He was so caught up in his own feelings that he didn’t know his best friend had stage 4 pancreatic cancer. It was needless to say he felt like absolute shit. She had end-stage cancer and he, a doctor, couldn’t do a single fucking thing about it. 

He waited until he was out of her sight before he let all his emotions out, he asked her if she could go back in the apartment and leave him on the roof to process what had happened, she did. 

He knew all about pancreatic cancer, he knew that the symptoms usually don’t show up until it was too late,  he knew that it would’ve already spread all across her body. Yet, it didn’t stop him from completely breaking down after she went back down. 

He sobbed, he sobbed until all the tears were gone, then he shouted, he shouted at the night sky, shouting at every being up there, screaming at them, asking how they could possibly curse the most perfect person in the world with an untreatable tumour. 

Once he was done, once his tear ducts were dry and his throat was hoarse, he returned to the apartment, his eyes red and his throat sore. He quietly crept into her room, seeing those teary eyes of hers that broke his heart, that made every cell in his body hurt and scream. He wordlessly climbed into her bed and wrapped his arms around her. That was how they spent the rest of the night, him silently holding her in his arms, not willing to ever let go. 

She fell asleep fast, she was tired, she was always tired nowadays. He was the opposite, his mind racing. He spent the entire night hating himself for not realising sooner, for missing all the clues. All the clues that were right in front of his face this whole time. 

He remembered the first time he tried to tell her when she came home upset, was that when she learned the news? He thought about how she reacted to the movie they watched, he finally realised why she was crying so much more. Then there was the night she threw up, he cursed himself for missing that. It had been so obvious. But he hated himself the most for not spending all his time with her when he had the chance. 

Now as he sat in the hospital room, his head in his hands as she slept soundly, all he could do was wait. Wait for the cancer to take her from her friends, her family, from him. That’s all he could do now, wait. Ethan had been in the hospital for a week now, she’d wanted to be at Edenbrook so that he could see her during his breaks, but he hadn’t worked since the day he found out. 

He only went back to their apartment to take a shower every now and then, and even then he sprinted to and fro. They didn’t know when her time would be up, it could be hours, days, weeks, or even months. And he had to be around when she ran out of time, he would hate himself even more if he wasn’t. 

He had called all of their friends, and they all took turns showing up at her room to see her. Bryce showed up with a gigantic stuffed teddy bear that didn’t fail to make her laugh. Jackie came with a million stories about her horrible intern, attendings, and patients alike. Sienna came in everyday bearing fresh home-cooked food for her. 

His dad and her mom showed up most days too, providing words of encouragement for not only her, but him as well. They both figured out one way or another how he felt about her, and they knew how hard it was for him. 

Ethan was always at the hospital, but limited the time he spent in her room. He couldn’t stand being at her bedside, watching her groan and moan in pain as he was completely fine. Everything just felt too real for him. 

“Doctor Ramsey, she’s asking for you,” a nurse said. He looked up and nodded. His feet felt heavy, like they were made of bricks as he approached her room. He pushed the door open, and his heart dropped at the sight before him.

She was staring back at him, her eyes hadn’t changed a single bit. The rest of her didn’t share the same fate as her eyes. She was thinner, her face pale and gaunt, she looked exhausted. The hospital gown looked as if it was wearing her, and not the other way around. And despite all of that, she was still beautiful in his eyes. 

“Hi,” she said in a whispered tone.

He pressed his lips together, choking back the tears that were beginning to form. He couldn’t handle this.

“You look awful,” she teased, which earned a pitiful laugh from him as he wiped the sides of his eyes where tears were moments away from falling. 

She moved to one side of the hospital bed to make room for him. He hesitated for a moment, afraid that he would hurt her some way, but he eventually laid down beside her. Her frail frame clung to him, and he felt the dreadfully familiar feeling of her tears staining his shirt. 

“I’m so scared, Eef,” her use of the enchanting nickname she gave him that he wholeheartedly loved made the tears fall from his eyes as he closed them tightly, holding back a sob.   

He didn’t know what to say, he couldn’t find the right words, so he just hugged her as tightly as he could without hurting her and pressed his lips against her forehead. After all, what were you supposed to say to someone whose life you would trade your own with when they’re dying? 

Was he supposed to lie and say “everything’s going to be okay”? He wouldn’t, he couldn’t bring himself to lie to her any longer after all the wasted time he spent lying about his true feelings. No, he would hold her. He would hold her and love her until he couldn’t love her anymore.

[troop52]

do u !!! have any character theme songs for the troop boys? Like any songs you think really fits them (and why u think it fits)?

THATS A GREAT QUESTION!!

Before I get into it Im going to plug this collaborative Troop Playlist on Spotify, feel free to add onto it!! Continuing with my picks

I think a lot of the songs I associate with The Troop in general are just because I happened to listen to them around the same time I got into the book in the first place (So they could only be tangentially related BUT only if you squint hard) Example: Drunk by The Living Tombstone, cant really tie it into the story but in my mind its linked Some better, more fitting songs under the cut (Side note its LONGGG IM SORRY... Also its all YouTube links because some of these arent on Spotify :'^()

Disclaimer -Like 95% of my choices arent really a "These lyrics match up exactly 1 to 1" but more of an overall "the vibe/general idea its trying to capture lines up" type thing. If that makes sense.

Its Alright by Jack Stauber: Kind of self explanatory, I think its a perfect song for these guys. From "It's alright, I'm here, Everything's alright, Feels weird but calm, I wanna hear It's alright" to the whole sound of it- its all great. Equal parts distressing and sad with an almost eerie calmness to it. Despite it all theyre gonna be alright, right?

The Second Little Piggy by Worthikids: Another one that I think is sort of self explanatory- at least with the chorus. "If my brain turns to mush, If the shit hits the fan, Will you be my friend?" Kind of the falling apart of everything, specifically their relationships, in light of the incident.

Poor George by James Supercave: Another case of "listened to at the same time I read the book" BUT I was actually making a Troop PMV script with that song. I never finished it but maybe Ill revisit it... just for you

Cold Summer by Le Matos ft Computer Magic: I dont even think this takes place in the summer but the VIBES and also it came from Summer of 84, which is another good piece of murder boy media.

Treehouse by Alex G ft Emily Yacina: This is a Eef and Max type of song because they are bffs and thats final. Basic song because Im not creative, but I think its a nice heart to heart theyd have (with Eef doing the talking)

Fifteen Minuets by Nick Krol: On the flipside heres a song that goes with Eef and Maxs friendship fracturing, once again more from Eefs side than Maxs. THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTINGGG

As far as songs for the boys as individuals hmmm thats a good one that I havent thought about as much...

MAX + The Ghosts by The Real Tuesday Weld: That survivors guilt... lyrics arent like a perfect match but I think it gets that sort of hollow feeling across. Hes haunted man... + Final Girl by Electric Youth: Ok its a little funny because har har Final Girl Trope but I mean HE IS ONE. ANd dont look at me its a nice song- "Others were gone, and you kept going on, You know they never really noticed, you were always different, One by one, They're all done, And you're the last one standing" + Going Grazy by Lonesome Wyatt and the Holy Spooks: HONESTLY this could go for all the characters but Im tagging it onto Max because hes the one who has to deal with the aftermath of losing everyone (sorry survivors guilt Max again </3) "Everyone's saying my mind is unsound, 'Cause I always see you when you aren't around" "They're gonna wrap me in a jacket of white, And lock me away in a room without light" is what cements it as a Max song for me

EEF + The Existential Threat by Sparks: Once again starting sad, I link this one specifically to his paranoia about the worms- especially with lines like "Can't they see the existential threat is on its way". Kind of exasperated no one else can see the danger (he thinks) hes in. + Wrecking Ball by Mother Mother: I know I know its basic but I cant help it!!! Eef anger issues arc we are shaking hands me too + Haunted by Laura Les: Eef struggles with people seeing him as "just like his father" and I think we can get some good angst out of this track if we keep that in mind. Especially the back half of the song with lyrics like "Do you think I'm frightening?" and "Mirrors shatter when I'm passing, broken glass and crashing" since he is just a reflection of his dad (to others at least). Also song good.

KENT + Goodbye Mr A by The Hoosiers: Mfw the disillusionment with authority sets in. I think the vibe fits when he had that little epiphany about how adults are fucked- not perfect but it gets the idea across me thinks. + I'm Gonna Win by Rob Cantor: Ties into his need to "win" aka be the best at everything, be in charge, all that jazz! Hell do whatever it takes to be successful, even if it hurts. That was a little emo + Toba the Tura by Forgive Durden ft Chris Conley: Not to be emo again but "They say you're gifted, well I just see a scared kid. They must have flipped it, your skills are latent. O, you snuffed the glow. Replaced it with coals. Threw away the throne... This mess that you've made, it's a six-foot grave. It's a home for your lonesome bones that remain. We'll disappear, but you'll stay here to rot" AND SO ON AND SO FOURTH representing his fall after it was revealed he was sick. He was referred to as "the uncrowned king" and was on top of the world but then POOF that all crumbled and it was made out that he basically deserved what happened to him. It would be fun to make a pmv of him with this song (Simplifying my thoughts a bit because Ive already written a LOT)

NEWT + I Earn My Life by Lemon Demon: Ok a little Kentcore but Im actually having a hard time coming up with songs for Newton so here we are, they can share. Newt existential crisis moment time I guess + Know How by The Crane Wives: POV Newt struggles with going through with the plans he makes to keep everyone safe (stopping Max from touching Kent, going back into the cabin, etc) "I am not brave, I am not brave, I keep my focus on what is safe, You drew a line, made up your mind, And now I'm struggling to realize" And also maybe struggling with his place in the group and as a person in general- all that living through his cousin thing. "I gotta wrap my head around, What my heart is telling me, I've been trying to drown it out, Just because I know what I am, I am supposed to do now, Doesn't mean I know, Doesn't mean I know how" + On The Outside by Oingo Boingo: Idk man. Hes on the outside lookin in!! Loner nerd!! Its ok though, we still love him

SHEL + Bad Blood by Creature Feature: The lyrics speak for themselves: "I can guarantee I will do evil things, The only way that you can stop me now, Is if you put me in the ground, Somewhere I'll never be found" + Frontier Psychologist by The Avalanches: Hinges on the fact that the principal or whoever was like "Your sons a freak" and Shels mom was like "HES PERFECTLY FINE" while Shelley was like dismembering an animal or something + Johnny by American Murder Song: The songs good but theres this ONE LYRIC that sucks so the link provided is an edited version and also a lovely Warriors oc video I think you should all enjoy and support <3 Anyway Shel would be Johnny I could see this song being a scene in the book. Field trip to Shels house and they find his murder garden

If anyone wants more for Im not opposed to making another post :^)

[jaquis-desolate-world]

Things Unus Annus has taught us

31. “Unus Annus” DOES NOT mean “One Butt.” It means “One Year” in Latin.

2. Make the most of the time you have left, because you only have one life.

3. Sex toys can be used for cooking!

4. The Disclaimer Song~!

5. Don’t tell Amy!!!

6. Amy’s word is law, and her eyes are blessed and holy.

7. Amy is SCP-11325

8. Telling Mark how much he inspires people makes him sweat through his eyes.

9. Chica is a foodie!

10. Spencer and Henry are picky eaters.

11. Bohdy~! He’s almost a year old!

12. ~“Hey now, don’t try this at home.”~

13. Mark is the tired, grumpy father with an over-energetic kid.

14. Eef loses braincells when he knows the camera is about to come on.

15. Amy’s bugwatch was donated to children.

16. New cryptids were made!

17. A watermelon broke them both, thus giving rise to “The Melon Man.”

18. Ethan became a man and helped build a house for Chica.

19. Ethan is an elegant swimmer, and a patient teacher.

20. He also put the “fear of broken bows” (bones) in Mark, while teaching him gymnastics.

21. “tHe MeLon maKeS ThE MaN!!!”

22. Ethan broke Mark, thus creating “Hee Hoo.”

23. Being a good boyfriend doesn’t mean taking abuse from your partner.

24. Artistic reference for men in suits making dynamic poses!!!

25. Goat Yoga!

26. THE GONGOOZLER!!!

27. Eef can use echolocation!

28. Mark is the brains of the two.

29. Ethan becomes PURE, UNBRIDLED RAGE without Mark.

30. They learned boundaries with each other.

31. Nudity. Poor Amy...

32. Mark is (not) a masochist. He’s a sadist.

33. Ethan is the masochist.

34. Ethan surprised his own trainer and WENT EVEN FURTHER BEYOND!!! With coke.

35. You can make content with just about anything.

36. Ethan becomes a mutated-processed-meat tycoon, becoming a kind in the industry, as well as a tyrant.

37. Momiplier outclasses Mark and Ethan in unfiltered, comedy gold.

38. An incubus had tried seducing Momiplier and Grannyplier. Grannyplier scared him away with death and water!