#holy shit it's already been a year
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Happy 1st anniversary to the craziest game I've seen in my 21 years span 🥳
(without background version)
#fyp#art#digital art#pizza tower#pizza tower art#pizza tower fanart#fanart#happy anniversary#holy shit it's already been a year
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OTC BIRTH CONTROL APPROVED BY THE FDA
#IM SO HAPPY I ALMOSY STARTED CRYJNG#it's a minipill its been on the market already for 50 years it's identical to the prescription version#FINALLY A GOOD DECISION FROM THE FDA!!!!!!#flickerthoughts#the only question i have now is pricign and accessibility but holy shit what news
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happy birthday to these fucking rats
#it's been a year already????#avoid the void came out on my birthday last year holy shit#sonic the hedgehog#sth#sonic#shadow the hedgehog#sonadow#sonic prime
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liquid lizard
#i'm just brainstorming at this point#villainous#demencia#my art#(belated) happy anniversary to villainous btw#can't believe it's been 7 years already holy shit
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time flies!!! damn!!!
#scribblins#can't believe it's already been a year holy shit#well happy anniversary to one of the best decisions of my life#i don't really have anyone to celebrate with irl but i'll probably treat myself at a local cafe... they have a very tasty french toast!
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whiteboard dragons <3 it's dragon appreciation day!
#DRAGON APPRECIATION DAY. GO KISS A DRAGON RN. TAKE THEM ON A DATE.#barn in the corner. ignore him. he'll be in a different post#mannnn jade (green dragon) really just. has a bad time from start to finish#w a few shining moments in between#well. no. tbf she actually gets a decent chunk of Peace in her life#but when shit hits the fan again it just does not stop hitting... Yayyyy!!!!!#man. same for daelyn really.#once the bad times start it just gets Worse and Worse <3#scribble salad#not-fish <3#dragon#dragons#dragon oc#oc#original character#original characters#ocs#ITS THE YEAR OF THE DRAGON BABEY LETS GOOOOOOOO#its been like. 2 weeks of 2024 and ive already gotten so much done w my dragons#like! some of them finally have actual names!!!! holy shit!!!
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dyke!Chilaios has me understanding breeding kink all of a sudden
#chilaios#that's a lie i understand breeding kink very well lmao#HOWEVER IT MUST BE SAID#they finish up a great scene. hot lesbian sex. all going well.#and laios lies back with her eyes closed. still flushed and sweaty. she rests her naked hand on her naked lower stomach and says. 'hah....#'did you know ...that tallmen and halflings can have kids together?' Like its just another fun monster fact.#she's trailing her fingers absentmindedly over her stomach now. tracing idle patterns.#'with our lifespans being so similar it isn't even as big a deal as it is for elves and humans. they're even fertile and that's ...#that's really rare for hybrids.' her eyes are still closed. she swallows hard. She's more red now than she was when they fucked.#'you should talk about that next time you're in me. i'd like it...' and she cracks one eye open a sliver#to see chilchuck . BEET. RED.#because Chilchuck DID NOT. KNOW.#She was already fucked out and now she's dying?? she's dying. Laios still has her huge hand resting on her huge smooth stomach#miles and miles of soft skin...that she wants chilchuck to put a BABY in#she's thought about the hypothetical lifespan and safety of the hypothetical baby! is this just a sex thing? is this a for real thing?#chilchuck does not know and does not know which one she's hoping for now!! cause both sound GREAT#AND OF COURSE THERE'S ALSO#chilchuck remembering that conversaion next time Laios's huge huge fingers are inside her. Laios's hot wet breathing by her ear.#Laios's breathing going ragged even though no one is touching HER she is the one toying with Chilchuck right now. She always does that.#between the breathing and the fingers and the warmth and the smell Laios is all around her and she just thinks -#'Laios is so huge. Laios's baby would be so huge. I'd be so huge. Pregnant with it.' And she cums.#rattles her to her fucking core. Chilchuck who HAS BEEN PREGNANT BEFORE realising. holy shit.#i want this fluffy haired socially awkward 26 year old doggirl to . to fuck a baby into me. in a sexy way.#i think . I think it's hot.#enough to turn you to drink isn't it!#u may ask - hey how come chilchuck has a girlcock and has got pregnant? can laios get chilchuck pregnant?#does anyone even have a womb in this situation? I may answer - don't worry about it#a wizard did it. whatever. its a fantasy world.#whatever is sexiest in the moment i don't care#lesbiance
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It was a beautiful warm day.. the sun’s light leaking through the trees leaves onto the forest floor. The forest was quiet and peaceful. Only sounds were the morning birds singing, the soft rustling of leaves as they blew in the wind, and the gentle sound of the river…
Sirius sat by the river.. it was a place to escape from everything else… They stared down at their reflection in the clear water but all they saw was red…
Despite everything, they will never be able to escape one thing… and that was today…
…Happy Birthday Sirius
#sans au#equivaltale#utmv#sirius sans#art#sans au art#dreamtale au#Sirius!sans#dreamtale#undertale au#character birthday#holy shit it has been a year already#wtf#They’ve officially survived one year of existence#AAAAAA-
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Communicating with medical staff is its own special circle of hell. Do they even read your messages before they respond??? This can't just be my set of doctors, can it?
#I'd write it off if it only happened 2 or 3 times but holy shit it's all the time always#Sometimes they answer a question comically irrelevant to what I asked#This time a nurse stepped in to lmk that I can't have the labs I requested unless I'm currently experiencing fatigue#I let them know I have been for YEARS (they should already know this. It should be all over my charts)#and a DIFFERENT NURSE replies#saying sorry I read all your messages and labs and we can't run that test unless you're currently experiencing fatigue :/#And I have to wait up to a week sometimes for a responce!!!! Makes me want to scream
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do you ever end up accidentally getting super attached to a trope so specific and rare you don't even know how to look for it? 'space aliens failing to understand that a human showing teeth usually isn't a threat display' isn't even an ao3 tag. finding that shit in published fiction or tv shows is next to impossible
#<- guy who searches ao3 by the 'misunderstandings' tag without even specifying a fandom#mumbling#if you've been following me for a while you may remember my introduction to mcyt was when i started scraping the bottom of the barrel#looking for 'humans are space orcs' stories#but what you may not know is that was already a ways down a rabbit hole that began with *avatar the last airbender*#it basically went#'holy shit salvage is a good story' -> read every existing version of hakoda being a good dad to zuko ->#'shinsou hitoshi getting adopted by aizawa has the same vibes fuck it i'll read that too' -> 'why are they aliens in so many of these' ->#get addicted to the 'humans are space orcs' trope -> find a whole collection of fics about that exact thing ->#for some reason the collection is 80% dsmp fics -> i am not picky -> 'oh no they've got a crow-coded father figure' ->#still not rly interested in the dsmp source material -> minecraft kinda interesting tho -> wait what's hermitcraft -> and now here we are#all bc 3 years ago i wanted zuko to have a decent father figure#firelord ozai made me draw pinup art of goodtimeswithscar: the true and harrowing tale of my descent into madness#flameo hotguy or whatever the kids are saying these days
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admittedly, i am afraid to talk about this, but have wanted to for a long while. i don't see a lot of people discuss this kind of thing, but i decided to do so for the me who was struggling and didn't know. also i have no idea where i am going with this and it's very late for me rn so here's a whole ass ramble on vent art. and also a bit more on how it's impacting how i view my art, now. i am terribly sorry if it's not very cohesive, my thoughts on it aren't yet cohesive either WOOPS
i wanted to talk a bit about how vent art really impacted my mental health, and how the idea that art needs some kind of meaning to have meaning really has been weighing on me lately (i know this is a concept i am assigning to my work and is not actually the norm/standard expectation of others consuming art. but it IS a sentiment i have seen enough that does impact me).
i want to specify, obviously i am not saying vent art is bad.
nor that doing vent pieces, or vent blogs, will ultimately result in what i went through for a number of years. rather, that this did happen to me, and there is a near impossible chance i am a unique case in any experience i will ever have. if you do vent art and it helps you, that's good! im not judging anyone for anything here. if your experience does not match my own, that's what it's like to be human~. i am not invalidating anyone on purpose by sharing my own experience. sorry for the insane disclaimer but it will eat me alive if i go to sleep thinking "what if they think x cuz i didn't say y and think im a terrible person"
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i used to do vent art frequently (you won't find much on here as it was uploaded to a personal at the time). anytime i felt down or had a line of dialogue in my head making me feel bad in a way, i would draw for it. but the way i had interacted with it was really unhealthy. it became a terrible feedback loop where i'd feel bad, draw how i felt bad, look at the art, and ruminate even more on how i felt bad, until it spiralled so out of control i would lose touch with reality and get lost entirely in feeling like garbage.
i would just get so lost in the cycle with vent art that it would make my mental space worse and worse, and i would use the vent art as a negative confirmation bias. the words that hurt me i wrote down and anytime i looked again, they would hurt me again. but i would keep looking, and i would keep drawing.
i have always used art as an outlet, but for some reason the way vent art impacted me was unhealthy. it wasn't a good outlet. and it took me years to cut ties with it. i relied on vent art for a long time, but it took a lot of introspection and thinking to realise it wasn't the release i thought it was. and it was hard to let go, too.
i haven't touched the blog in a few months, now. i haven't done much vent art at all since then and genuinely, i've been doing SOOO much better. i no longer ruminate nearly as much as i had done so, i no longer get caught in a feedback loop that lasts for days to weeks. i still feel like garbage like people tend to do, but i don't put myself in a cycle over it anymore. i have gone back to it a few times in moments of desperation, but what used to be every week/every few weeks is now once a month maybe. and not to the extent at all (i would oftentimes post ~20 images in one night, before).
but i keep thinking about how, while the way i had done vent art was bad for my mental health, i keep feeling that just because i do sparkly cute and happy drawings, now, or drawings with no real meaning, that my art has nothing beyond face value... i do like a lot of my vent art. i think their compositions, or hidden messages and meanings, or colour use, was interesting.
but it wasn't worth the price for me.
so i am a bit caught in an in-between, here. my favourite form of art is the expression of love-you liked something so much, you dedicated time to draw it. and yet i cannot ascribe that to my own work very often. i think that man i wish i could make art with some kind of deeper meaning, that speaks to people, that's more than just pretty colours or shiny shading or a character everyone likes, or a character i like. but i just... don't know if it's for me.
ultimately, i could develop a healthy relationship with expressing and exploring negative emotions or experiences through art, but... do i want to? do i have to? do i need to? is it not enough to just draw something because... i like it..?
of course, the answer is yes, draw what you want, draw how you want, it's your art. but i am still trying to come to terms with that idea. i dont want to be seen as some shallow artist who just draws what's cute and pretty because they can and it's all they can think of, but like what if that's just what i like to draw??
in the end, that alone is good enough, drawing because you like to, because it's fun, because you like the thing you're dedicating time to creating for. it's just hard to grapple with after discarding a type of art that i felt was the only way i drew "for real".
anyways i am sorry this is soooo fucking long, and for all the clarifications (IM STILL NOT SAYING VENT ART BAD AND EVERYONE WILL DO WHAT I DID!! Dx) and the fact i had no real point here (probably)
anyways i will continue to draw what i want because i like to, as i have always been.
#text#my art#doodle#sketch#sona#prince#cyclops#long post#HOLY SHIT THIS IS MUCH LONGER THAN I ANTICIPATED#sorry for the fucking rambling essay at 12am#tomorrow im doing cute commission art because its cute and i like that#i might one day share some of my fav vent pieces but for now its a bit weird#its also weird being open on any platform of mine not dedicated to being my personal blog#so im also very anxious abt that#but i wanted to try being more open and active on here too... so...#i hope this is ok#this isnt a vent either btw just me going on a ramble#i have been thinking abt it a lot the past year#also sorry for the many disclaimers#i am internetpilled and working on it#its funny cuz i dont even use twitter or tiktok which is commonly associated w the whole uh#people irl: hey whats up#kind of thing#i am very scared to share but i have a draft of this topic saved already like i do want to talk abt it#idk what i am afraid of so whatevs#also dont expect this much so anyone whos afraid ill be doing posts like this often#uh dont worry BSBDFBSD
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Whenever I can set my own in-game birthday for a game, I always set it for the day after I start playing. That way I get my reward straight away (there's no guarantee that I'll still be playing by the time my irl birthday comes around) And it serves as a handy reminder for how long I've been playing if I end up playing the game long term.
Which means.....
I've officially been playing Twisted Wonderland for a year! 🎉🥳🎉
And Lilia came to say happy birthday 🥰
#also holy shit what It's been a year ALREADY#*staring into the middle distance*#the passage of time is unrelenting
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I'm getting overwhelmed again with wanting to rewrite the entirety of Lupin III - Goodbye Partner as a fic my own way, because I am still salty about how Jigen's betrayal was handled and I am pretty sure I could do a better job than TMS did (hell, they handled that same premise better in Seven Days Rhapsody, and it was a B plot!!)
Except I can't do that because 1) I have to finish writing Hanafuda and 2) I have like. zero plot for it right now (but I know if I put my mind to it I could)
In the meantime please have this song that makes me think about what that movie could have been, while I daydream about magic tricks and lighters and proceed to chew at my walls 👍
#i was already going insane about the use of the lighter in Goodbye Partner#but in retrospect with the added symbolism from ZERO i am losing my entire SHIT#and i'm sure there's something that could be done with the magic trick other than a cute throaway reference to cagliostro#because. cagliostro. the opening credits. the road trip. fire treasure.#cagliostro being canon as backstory for goodbye partner deepens the hurt of the betrayal SO MUCH because HOLY SHIT-#(yes I am still going insane about fire treasure/the opening credits of cagliostro. it's been three years. leave me alone.)#i did like the fact that the kid's relationship to jigen was never explicited though. i'd keep that i think.#mostly i just want to rewrite the way lupin and goemon took jigen's betrayal because it was just NOT handled realistically in that movie#give me some ANGST! give me some TURMOIL!#anyway. that's probably gonna be my next big project after hanafuda IF i can actually figure out a plot#but for now i'm gonna concentrate on my silly little au and its silly little romance 🥰#lupin iii#daisuke jigen#lupin iii : goodbye partner#the hobbit writes
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feeling solidarity these holidays with everyone not allowed to talk about their partner with the family
#for some reason i too am not allowed to bring him up when my dad is present because he gets really uncomfortable about it#and my mom has to come tell me off about it in private bc he wont say the problem directly to me#thunderclap#i understand the problem but what the hell man im almost 27 years old#its extra annoying cause ive been to his house a lot already and i know his parents and have a good relationship with them#but my parents absolutely REFUSE to let him come here because again itd make my dad uncomfortable to have us (checks notes)#living in the same space??#my GRANDPARENTS have seen my partner more than my parents have#i just think its annoying as hellll holy shit all i did was bring up miguel sleeptalking and say hes woken me up once or twice saying stuff#and my mom told me off on it after like 'dont bring up you being in bed with your guy in front of your dad' HUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!#HUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW AM I SUPPOSE TO INFER THAT AS THE MEANING TO WHAT I SAID... I WAS JUST TELLING A FUNNY ANECDOTE#THAT HAD 100% TO DO WITH THE CONVO WE WERE HAVING (SLEEPWALKING)#ARRGHGGHGHGHGH THIS IS JUST LIKE COSMIC ONLINE REACHING BUT IRL
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will never forget the way i felt when i first heard lftos. the way i literally couldn’t believe what i was hearing bc it was So good and So magical, i immediately felt like crying bc it made me feel So Much. the way i then looped it literally all day bc it was the best song i’d ever heard in my life. and she Still is one of the best songs i’ve ever heard <3
#lftos u will always be so so so special to me i cant believe its already been a year#i remember specifically having to pause it at the bridge bc i was like holy shit this is from the postcard (the postcard i got!!!!)#and i felt so emotional about it. SOOO special man. lftos is unlike any other song to me#forever one of my favs of all time i mean it!!!!!#txt
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#tumblrtop10#since everyone else is doing it#holy SHIT u guys have been so kind to me???#i'm approaching one year on simblr if not already passed it#and wow#so grateful for this community
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