#holy cheese this got long
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✦ . * ocean blue eyes pt. II | r.c
pairing: rafe cameron x reader
author's note: els wants me to do 30 parts like girl pls😭 also shoutout to @viawritesstuff for helping me out🤍
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
liked by youruser, rafe, jjmaybank and 45.216 others
popeheywardphotography happy belated birthday @.rafe the man, sorry i couldn’t make it to the party 🫡
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allaboutrafe how old is this picture and why did we have to wait so long to see it😫
jjandrafes I don't know who to look at first
maybankzz something about going to paris
➞ alisonxcarter Are you not worried about your digital foot print?😭😭
↳ maybankzz no❤️
raferaferafe I miss Rafe in his curtain bangs era
kiecarerra I'm surprised Rafe and JJ managed to stay civil
➞ popeheywardphotography they got in a fistfight literally 3 minutes after this pic was taken
↳ jjsgf Rafe and JJ being friends challenged failed
liked by youruser, sarahcam, kiecarerra and 147.989 others
johnbroutledge bday party was legendary @.rafe 🔥
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raferaferafe holy fuck🥵
jarahforever all of them look like they just stepped out of a calvin klein ad
➞ allaboutrafe real
rafesgf who’s the girl next to rafe?
➞ sarahcameronsbaby that’s kiara, one of sarah’s best friends
➞ rafecam_eron idk who that is but I would be cheesing the same way if I was standing next to him
cleogriffith fomo fr
➞ jjmaybank it's only rafe's birthday, don't beat yourself up over it
↳ rafe fuck you
↳ jjmaybank ❤️
rafecameron4lyfe did anyone come here from Rafe's story? lol
➞ jjsandrafes me haha
➞ rafefan ME
➞ kingrafe Rafe knew what he was doing
sarahcam replied to this story: why don’t you just send this to yn
rafe: i don’t know what you’re talking about
────────────
Sarah’s phone:
liked by rafe, sarahcam, jjmaybank and 2.993.214 others
youruser guilty as sin
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ynsgf LJSLAHQOALAAH
gracieandyn 🥵🥵🥵
ynheadquarters respectfully, i’m looking
ynfancam this feels directed at someone....
➞ ynspain Right????? That's what I was thinking as well
➞ allhailyn why can’t she just post a hot picture without you guys assuming that it’s about a man?
sarahcam catching the next flight back rn
➞ johnbroutledge I'm right here...
↳ youruser sorry John B 🤭
kiecarerra 🤩🤩
➞ youruser 🥰
ynforever hi! (louder than everyone else)
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
author’s note: tell me all your thoughts🤭🥰
#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron#rafe x reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe x you#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron social media au#drew starkey social media au#drew starkey#outer banks#obx
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Check Yes ch 10
masterpost
“Why are you so cheerful?” Damian narrowed his eyes up at Dick, as if he could possibly intimidate his elder brother. “And why are you still here? Return to Bloodhaven at once, where someone might desire your presence.” He dropped his phone on the bench with a clack and roughly pulled his sweatshirt over his head. His hair floofed up after it, trailing with static electricity.
Wow, someone was still holding a grudge over him spilling the beans about the elementary school art show. Why so cranky? Cass and Stephanie hadn’t done anything embarrassing, they’d just come with him and said that it was nice. Damian had done this family portrait thing where no one had eyes or hands. It was avante garde or something. Dick didn’t really get it, but the technical proficiency was really impressive.
Dick bounced on his heels a bit as he got his gloves on. He felt his hair bounce with the movement. He felt extremely light and breezy. “Because you would miss me,” he teased.
Damian grunted and looked away. He yanked open his locker and pretended that he was the only one in the changing room as he pulled off his pajama pants and started to wiggle into the Robin uniform. The leg armor squeaked as he forced it up and into place.
Quiet footsteps padded into the room. Dick caught sight of Timmy in his locker mirror.
‘He will definitely be up for fucking with Jason and his date a little.’
“There is a little something going on tonight,” Dick said, faux casually. He cracked his neck and then started going through the double check of all the fastenings of his uniform and basic equipment. “Remember earlier, when Duke sent that odd message?”
Damian grunted.
“Well, I looked into it, and-”
“Holy shit, Jason is calling out of patrol tonight in the group chat.” Stephanie’s voice trailed faintly over the divider between the locker rooms. “Do you see this shit, Nicki Minaj?”
Dick blinked. “Nicki Min-”
That apparently meant Tim, who lunged for his phone and unlocked it. He stared in disbelief for a moment. “Is he allowed to do that?” he asked. He scrunched his face up, clearly disturbed.
‘Makes sense, but does that mean I’m going to be chasing Jason, not Red Hood?’ Dick crinkled up his nose and thought about it. Probably not? He didn’t want to give anyone the impression that Jason’s civilian ID was being hunted by law enforcement. Jay probably just didn’t want Dick to be able to track him down too easily. Fair enough. 5 of them on patrol was quite honestly a lot more than Gotham needed on an average night.
Damian snorted. “Don’t be absurd,” he sneered. “We are all entitled to a certain number of rest days per week. Have you forgotten the holistic wellness powerpoint presentation so easily, you despicable fool?”
“Shut up, nerd.” Tim held his phone in Damian’s face.
Damian stared at it without blinking for a long few seconds. “...I was not aware this was a genre of action of which he was capable.” He looked incredibly troubled.
The expression wiped off of Dick’s face.
‘What did that little shit do?’
“Maybe it’s a sick mind game?” Stephanie suggested, voice lifting in question.
Dick yanked his locker open and dug his phone out. He unlocked it in a blur of motion, already scowling.
Jay had sent a picture to the birdchat with a selfie of him and a man who must be Danny, the dead guy on the other end of the sacrifice contract. They were leaning together over a dinner table. Jay was cheesing for the camera, a glint in his eye that said he knew he was being a little shit. Danny looked kinda dazed, which probably meant he wasn’t quite wild enough for their life. Dick nearly felt a tinge of guilt about tagging him into their rivalry, but hey, it was just a friendly game.
The accompanying message was, “Can’t patrol tonight, I’m spending time with the boyfriend. Stay safe, losers and Steph.”
Dick huffed. He slammed his locker shut. Fine. So, he didn’t get to share the exciting news! That was fine. That was fair, even. Jay should get to launch his own relationship. It was just kinda-
Wait. He scrambled to open the locker again and looked at the selfie again.
He knew the wall behind them. It was an Italian place where Jay laundered money from the sale of imported Dutch narcotics.
‘They have to still be there,’ he realized, mind running through the minutes since he had confirmed with Babs via camera that the two were at the planetarium. He grinned like the Grinch and rushed out. “Bye, see you out there,” he called over his shoulder to the locker room and snatched up his helmet. He had already changed, after all! No need to wait around for the slowpokes and the old man who still wasn’t even coming down the Bat staircase yet.
Nightwing flung himself onto his motorcycle and tore off into the night. He crossed the bridge into Gotham, a flash of blue reflected off the choppy water below. It felt like minutes until he kicked out the stand for his bike and dismounted, clicking the protective tech on without stopping for a minute. He took the rickety, rust-red stairs up the outside of the building and slithered in the stairwell.
He wasn’t an amateur. He knew that Jay knew what he’d done. He was expecting Dick to come here. But that didn’t mean Dick couldn’t gain ground. Jay might still be here. Dick crept out into the restaurant through the kitchen, ducking out of sight from the line cook and bursting through the kitchen double doors in utter silence.
His gaze went unerringly to the table where the photo had been taken. A grim-faced waiter looked up, pristine white cloth in the process of wiping it down. “There’s a note for you,” he said. He indicated the receipt with a head tilt and finished his task, wiping down the salt shaker and other accoutrement.
Boo. Dick deflated. “Thank you,” he said. It was too much to expect for this to end first thing. Ah. He cheered up at the realization that this was better, actually. He was clearly only minutes behind them. The game wouldn’t be fun if it was too easy, after all. With that in mind he felt pretty chipper as he reached for the no doubt taunting note Jay would have left him on the back of the receipt. In his peripheral vision he noted the waiter picking up a short mop and running it over the floor under where Jay and Danny’s feet would have been.
…A riddle. They left him a riddle. “How does water fall onto a cranky little stormcloud?” Puzzled, he blinked. Uh, water going up? Something about condensation, about pipes, about… stormcloud? He crinkled his eyebrows and thought about Damian’s thunderous little face, chubby cheeks and all, positively sick with fury that Dick had betrayed him by attending his art show.
He had a bad feeling. He looked up. There, in the unfinished rafters, alien green eyes stared down at him predatorily from an inhumanly pale face.
Dick froze. Jason’s boyfriend was clinging to the ceiling like goddamn Dracula climbing down the castle wall, one clawed hand wrapped around a rafter, feet braced against another in a way that made his limbs look just slightly too long and angular. The other hand was holding a bucket.
Fuck. Dick dodged in a roll and barely evaded the bulk of the splash zone.
“Loser!” Jason’s voice called out.
Dick whipped his head over to see his brother grinning at him from the kitchen in a goddamn kitchen staff apron. “Bitch!” he said, appalled. Had he really walked past him without realizing it? No way. Just no way. He looked back up and jolted.
Danny was gone.
Fuck!
He looked back at the kitchen just in time to see Danny drape himself over Jason’s shoulder in a boneless way, flash a grin with teeth that were far too long, and then… and then. They both faded out of sight as Dick rushed the door. There was no hint as to where they had gone.
‘I should have gotten tactical information about Danny’s ghost abilities before I challenged them. This is on me, a little bit. I’ll have to have Babs take a look… No, not yet. They’re probably going around by one of Jason’s bikes, I can check on what’s missing and plug the license plate number into the auto search program.’’
“Excuse me.”
Disheartened, Dick blinked back at the waiter, who had already mopped up the water that Danny had dropped on him. He was impassively holding out another wet towel.
”...Thank you,” Dick said, and dried his left shin off so he stopped leaving drips across the restaurant.
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HEAR ME OUT…SURFER TOM X FEM. (Maybe they can do it on the beach…)
holy shit im hot n bothered
˖ ࣪ ⟢ beach boy tom
tom kaultiz who you met on summer vacation while out with your family that you were totally forced to go on. you’re not a beach person, but given the fact that they begged (and bribed) for you to come at least once in your lifetime, well, didn’t sound too bad at all. the salt air and cool breeze hit you and honestly, summer vacation didn’t look too shabby after all!
you sat on your beach towel under the umbrella as you watched your younger siblings play fight in the water, parents out to grab some more snacks from the local stand as you watched the bags. quickly, your eyes averted and begun ogling at the figure in the waves.
matt locs flow through the air as the water brushes past his body as if he were apart of it. surfing huh, it wasn’t your thing until today seeing those abs.
those washboard abs, you swear to god you can grate cheese on those fucking things.
they weren’t the most defined, but they were most definitely there. what also was there was the intense eye contact held between the two of you despite there being such a difference. and within a blink, the figure disappeared within the waves. as a couple seconds pass and you no longer see him in your peripherals, you pout, but quickly shrugged it off and decide to just move on.
time passes slowly as your parents finally return back with ice cream, yay! giving you a popsicle, you begin eating at the dessert, walking alongside the shoreline. your parents mentioned something about ‘getting with the locals’ pft, like that’s important for a summer vacation.
“hey,”
and you turn to face the figure calling out to you. he holds his surfboard under his arm as the latter rubs awkwardly at his neck. up close, you noticed his lip ring, amber eyes and the faint beauty mark on his left cheek. wow, he’s even hotter up close.
“oh. hi,”
he laughs at your awkwardness, as you stood there like a deer in headlights. to be completely honest, the eye contact shared wasn’t that big a deal to you, until seeing him a second time, even closer, now it was a big deal. “i noticed you earlier, thought you were cute.”
“you could see how cute i was from that far??”
“well, i mean—i could definitely tell you were cute. now i’m glad i got the chance to see you up close.. needless to say i’m not disappointed.” his cheeks were a little pink, cute.
“how, flattering.. y/n,”
“tom, you from here?”
and there you go on your needless babbling about how your only here for summer vacation. you weren’t even supposed to spend your summer in california. but here you are, hot summer california as you grind your cunt onto the abdomen of a man you just met. it didn’t take long for the two of you to take note of what one another wanted, tom guiding your hips as your clit ruts against his abs, biting your lips as pleasure bubbles in your core.
“you’re soaking me, princess.”
“oh please, d-don’t act like you’re not enjoying the view,”
“can’t say i am, but a pretty girl like you rubbing her sweet little cunt on these gorgeous abs? i’m fucking diggin’ it..”
a towel under the two of you as he leans on his surfboard that’s propped up against the tree. while ‘getting to know’ each other, tom lead you to a private area of the beach. curious, you wonder how and where he got the access to be in such a secluded area (but you didn’t need to know that this is the famous guitarist of a young and new band called tokio hotel).
nipping at your skin, tom kneads your ass behind his hands as he watches you fuck yourself on his pelvis, smearing your juices all over him. he finds you absolutely insatiable, tucking your hair behind your ears, tilting your chin down so he can place a kiss on your lips, tongue slipping in as you mangle with one another, tasting like fresh fruit.
breaking the kiss, he thumbs at your bottom lip, smirking, “think ya could help me out?” freeing his hard on from his trunks.
“holy shit you’re huge,” your eyes widen at not only the length but the girth, pinkish tip that twitches with anticipation, pre threatening to lean from it’s mushroom top, “i know, :).” you can’t help but scoff as he laughs jokingly.
now hovering your cunt over his cock, you lower your hips down as he slips in with ease. tom has to choke back a groan as his fingers dig into your hips. he could honestly cum right then and there. taking in every inch vein, your plush walls hug against his length, slowly but surely remembering the shape of his dick as you whine from the pleasure, “t-tom..”
“s’okay i got you baby, need help?”
with an eager nod from you, he plants a kiss to your cheek as he lifts your ass up, dragging your cunt allllll the way to the tip of his cock, harshly slamming your hips back down onto his lap. with a loud ‘thwop!’ he hits dead on into your cervix, leaving you to see stars as your legs tremble, cunt tightening against him, “mmmphf~!”
“f-fuckkkkk.. you like that don’cha?”
he forces you to ride him as he lifts you up and down his length, sliding your body to a rhythm he likes, but one that also you enjoy, clit occasionally hitting his pelvic bone.
“tommmm~ i—i might—”
a low grunt escapes tom’s lips as he observes your body, stomach beginning to clench as you also begin to mindlessly ride tom without his assistance. it’s wet and sticky between the two of you, nothing but a little swimming could clean off!
“that’s it.. ride me baby.. you feel amazing, ‘m cumming soon, shit.. don’want it to end..” tom now toying at your clit, helping you reach your climax. he mutters words under his breath, not being able to hear him over how your cunt flutters against his shaft, legs shaking as the knot in your stomach finally snapping, and all that you could see now is white.
“fuckfuckfuck..!” falling from tom’s lips as the way your pussy clenches against him wrings his cum out dry, also reaching his orgasm. fucking his hips in deeper as he cums, his tip assaulting your cervix threatening to put a baby in you, thank god for birth control amiright? don’t know when you’ll need it if your on vacation with your family.. amiright?
as you both ride out your highs, deep breaths shared between each other. “you okay?” he asks, fixing the straps of your bikini to sit properly on your shoulder once more. sweat glistening off his body as you watch his chest rise up and down.
staring a little harder, you notice the sun freckles that decorate his face. your eyes quickly catch onto his pink soft lips, you catch his lip piercing in a kiss, deepening it as you wrap your arms around his neck, bodies sharing even more heat through the warm summer weather.
“so, will i ever see you again?”
“don’t think you’re getting rid of me that easily princess, i better see you at the beach everyday that you’re here.“
as you playfully punch at his arm, you lay your head in the crook of his neck, raising your head up to kiss his face, smooching him again, you thank tom for being able to make your summer vacation worthwhile.
2008 tom kaulitz gives summer fling type shit and then you’ll never see him again except he’s totally obsessed with you and is already booking a ticket to your home town to live w u permanently :33
guys am i eating rn (in my flop arc)
#tokio hotel#tokio hotel x y/n#tokio hotel x you#tokio hotel x reader#tokio hotel smut#tom kaulitz#tom kaulitz x y/n#tom kaulitz x you#tom kaulitz x reader#tom kaulitz smut#2000s#fyp#billskeis
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alright my friends.
it’s time.
look! the wall I always take my pictures in front of is blue now! so much has changed. aeons have passed.
this looks unsettling
ohhhh this is dry milk powder! I’d know that taste anywhere - I used to love the stuff, and it’s pretty flammable.
hmm. tastes like there’s a bit of salt in this, and definitely some poppy seeds. fascinating.
I was gonna just go right to cooking it but hahaha holy shit this looks so gross now that I've added water to it
look at it! it looks like a really scummy pond with dead bugs floating in it!
okay. waiting-four-minutes time
Jackie why are you squeaking at me. I’m not letting you climb in the dishwasher again
(look at all the claw marks on the woodwork! she's a menace)
hmmm.
it doesn’t have a strong smell - it smells mostly of noodles with just a hint of garlic and caraway underneath
oh! all the sauce sank to the bottom, but stirring it up there’s definitely some creaminess in the texture of the sauce
hmm. now that it’s stirred up and there’s steam coming off of it, it smells mostly like hot milk, but specifically the instant kind. unsurprising.
okay, I’ve put this off for long enough.
oh the noodle texture is particularly slimy. and...huh.
on their own, the noodles taste like nothing. maybe some milk taste, but not much otherwise. but when I get a bite that has lots of seeds in it, I definitely taste them! and some bits of onion, too.
it’s not outright disgusting though, so that’s something
does it taste like an everything bagel? no. it tastes like noodles with caraway, poppy, sesame, onion, and salt.
does the sauce taste like cream cheese? disappointingly, no! it’s got a milky creaminess, but no sour tang to it at all!
weirdly, I feel like if it did have that sourness, it might taste more like an everything bagel.
speaking of...
it’s time for some science
so the first thing I have is popcorn that’s supposed to be everything-bagel-and-cream-cheese flavored. my sibling gave me this specifically for this experiment, so everyone say thank you to them for enabling me.
interesting! this doesn’t taste bad. it still doesn’t taste like bagel (and actually hold on...no, the popcorn on its own doesn’t taste like bagel either, just garlic) but I think the flavoring on the popcorn has added some much-needed taste to the noodles, and so it mildly improves it. three stars
next for the cream cheese
oh, significantly improved! ...or maybe I just love cream cheese. it adds such a nice tangy creaminess to it, and balances out the spices and seeds. four stars.
still tastes nothing like a bagel, though.
and so we try: packaged everything bagel seasoning!
ah. this was a lateral move. the seasoning on its own tastes good, but when added to the noodles it does nothing but make it a bit more salty. one star.
so now, I have to reveal to you. that I have one final trick. one last thing I can do to attempt to make these noodles taste like an everything bagel.
behold: an everything bagel
(and it’s a fancy one too! not a pre-packaged one! it’s even got sunflower seeds on it!)
I’m going to try a couple bites without cream cheese, and then I’m gonna add cream cheese and try that
...
hmm...
conclusion: this was a waste of a good everything bagel
I liked the cream cheese variation better, simply because I stopped being able to taste the noodles at all. five stars!
so when I started out I said the noodles themselves were not outright disgusting, but I’ve changed my mind. after tasting this really good actual everything bagel, these noodles do disgust me. partially because of their flavor, but more because of their (and Nissin's) moral integrity.
how dare they claim that this is what an everything bagel tastes like. this is an insult to bagels everywhere, and I find it truly offensive.
...anyway I guess I’m gonna go eat the rest of this now, because this is my actual breakfast today.
welp.
oh god. and I still have two more of these cup noodles! I forgot; I bought extras just in case!
wish me luck -_-
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Ok.. so this is for rise. Imagine, like future reader having comed back with CJ, but they only appears after the fight. And reader is just f/caked up, compared to the current reader. Idk if I’m making sense.
This could be platonic, or romantic but it’s just basically. How would the present turtles react to their future best friend/SO from future looking so scard and mentally and physically exhausted and so “out of character”, their personality has completely changed, they are just, grieving, and grumpy.
Sorry if this doesn’t make sense 😭
AN: I think I just puked from excitement, holy cheese. I've wanted to write something related to the movie but wasn't sure what, so thank you Anon 🙏 I hope I got the right idea. I've also only seen the movie once so apologies for any inaccuracies :')
Past Days, Future Pain
Rise Turtles x Reader
Warnings: contains spoilers for the ROTTMNT Movie, angst
Premise:
You knew that Michelangelo opening a portal into the past would be a gamble. You knew there was a chance that there would be complications. You just didn't expect to get separated from Casey Jr upon entry. In actuality, you hadn't anticipated to be joining him in his journey at all. The fight with the Kraang was meant to continue with you in it but Leonardo just had to push you into the portal. There's no telling what negative developments could arise with you being here and bumping into your old friends and, more importantly, your younger self. A worn laugh breaches your lips in a huff. Donatello would have a field day with this last-minute decision made by his brother.
From atop a building, you gaze over the pristine city, untouched by the nearing destruction you have grown so used to. It would be nice to say that everything is just as you remember it but this peace is a luxury you have long forgotten. Closing your eyes, you take a deep breath in. The air is so clean - a statement you never thought you would use to describe New York of all places. Voices dance all around, engaging in their idle chatter, obliviously free.
You frown. No time. There's no time to get nostalgic. Doomsday is just around the corner and there's no telling if that ball's already running in motion. Casey may have been born in ruin but you'll be damned if he witnesses apocalypse's birth.
Hours later, you would find out that, yes, doomsday is ripening into a poisonous fruit. Kraang minions are littered around the city, gravitating around the tall building where, just above it, Pandora’s box is open. It's too late, isn't it? The one chance you had. Gone. Your bleak reality is returning to fruition. As monstrous beings come at you left and right, your world darkens in tandem with all around you. Hope is lost for a second time. All the same, you continue to fight. Every breath, every swing, could be your last but still, you fight in the hope of at least finding Casey. You need to find him.
By the time you do, all is vanquished. You could cry from joy if part of you didn’t believe it was all a dream. There, you see all your old friends. Some you would have seen just hours ago, others you haven’t seen in many years. You pull the goggles from your face and rest them on your head for a better look.
“Sorry, I’m late. Did I miss the grand finale?”
They all turn when they hear the new voice and each goes wide-eyed. The turtles look between you and… you! Present you. Future you. Young. Old. The space-time continuum isn’t going to like this one. It’s one thing to meet the son of Cassandra but a future (Y/n)? Wild. Looks like they’ll be getting to know you. Again.
There's no way to return home. Your home is gone. Now that the timeline has changed, the only thing to do is to get comfortable. It'll be difficult. The only comfort you know is terrorised screams and running for your life. Adjusting to the world from which you came is going to be no easy feat and the turtles adjusting to this version of you is… well…
Raphael
The Wounded Warrior
To a fault, it’s always been Raph’s mission to protect you, ever since you first met. It saddens him to know that his future self couldn’t do that for you. From head to toe, you’re practically littered with scars. He doesn’t want to seem rude by staring but he can’t help it. He’s ridden with guilt for events that haven’t even happened. Events that won’t happen now thanks to them but that doesn’t change the fact that they’ve still happened to you. He notices how you avoid mirrors, how you avoid reflective surfaces altogether.
His fingers absentmindedly glide beneath his right eye. To an extent, he can understand what you’re going through. His experience doesn’t dare compare to what nightmares you’ve endured but it’s the ownership of a wound from said experiences. The memory associated with it and being reminded of those horrors every time you so much as look at yourself. It’s tiring. You look so tired; worn, broken, and beat.
Raphael frowns at himself. It would be hypocritical of him to preach tribute to your valour when he struggles to acknowledge his own. He could try all he wants to make you feel better but you’d likely call him out on the irony. That doesn’t stop Casey Jr and his brothers from psyching you both up when they recount stories from your ventures. It lumps the two of you into a corner but a corner you share nonetheless. As the others share their tales, he looks down at you, noting the way you fidget and avoid the praise. When he pulls you in for a side hug, you look up at him and he flashes a coy smile, making you do the same. There’s not much he can do for your physical scars but he can be there to share in the mild awkwardness of being glorified at least.
Leonardo
The Tortured Trooper
He tries many times to get a laugh out of you, just as he would with the (Y/n) he’s grown to cherish but no dice. Nothing he does works and it’s such a harrowing disparity. He himself has had a life-changing revelation because of all that’s happened but he couldn’t imagine what 20 years of that could do to a person. Well, he doesn’t need to imagine it. The result is right in front of him and translated through your future self. When he isn’t trying to put on some show for your amusement, he watches you. He notices how you stare off into dead space. Your eyes pale and glass over and he doesn’t need to think hard about where you disappear off to.
One night, he’s unable to sleep, pondering ways to get you out of your funk. His thinking would get cut short, however, when he hears a shrill cry come from your quarters. Sword in hand, he bolts for your room, expecting to find a threat but it’s just you. You’re hunched over, shaking and struggling for air, drenched in sweat. He carefully drops his sword and crawls out in front of you, trying to get you to calm down. You latch onto him with a deathly grip as if your life depended on it.
"I saw you die b-before coming here,” you sob out in broken breaths.
These are rare moments for Leo but it’s the kind of time where he doesn’t know what to say. No quip, no bad joke, no charming motivation. Nothing. All he can think to do is hold you and let you cry into his shoulder. It’s not much but if he can at least be there for these dark hours, that’s enough.
Donatello
The Hateful Hero
He's so used to fighting your present self's hug attempts that your chosen isolation throws him off course. Any attempt to even breathe in your direction is met with a raised weapon and a second-nature standoffishness. The laser-focused glare in your eyes for the short second you’re ready for battle is enough to give Donnie chills. He knows you’ve been through a lot but himself and everyone else included are your friends, aren’t they? They’re the one group of people guaranteed that you’re safe around.
Hypothesis: you’re so used to fighting for your life, that your body doesn’t know how to readjust to a more peaceful setting. As peaceful as you can get in this place, anyway. Your fight or flight response must be fried, constantly geared in combat mode. He tries to make the lair as hospitable as possible, filling it with things he knows his version of you likes. This only enrages you further and he has to believe that his initial theory may have been slightly off. When he tries to get an answer as to why, you just sit back in your corner and scowl off.
“How do I know this won’t all go away, too?” you ask bitterly.
Donnie stares down at you and slowly joins your side with no response. He dislikes questions he can’t answer with his usual certainty but he doubts any reassurance could put you at ease right now. It’s clear to him now. You’re scared to get close in case you lose it all again. He can’t guarantee that another doomsday won’t arise but he can say that they’ll be ready, at least. Until you’re soothed of your worries, he’ll let that be known every day if he has to.
Michelangelo
The Sullen Soldier
Mikey has always valued togetherness with his family and friends. He’s always cherished the joy that comes with unity, the memories that you make together. That’s why it’s so heartbreaking to see you shy away from the entire group. The only person who can get more than a few words out of you is Casey Jr but that’s understandable given all of what you’ve been through together. What happened to his fun-loving (Y/n) to turn you into this husk of a person? In hindsight, he and his brothers only caught a glimpse of the disastrous future from whence you came and that’ll be enough to last him a lifetime.
That makes this all the more terrible in his eyes. The world has been saved, the threat vanquished, and everyone is happy except for you - the one person who, outside of his family, means the most to him. He knows that deep down inside that gloomy shell you want to be a part of the household. You just need a gentle push in the right direction.
What’s the one thing that fixes everything? Pizza! That’ll do the trick for sure! It may not necessarily fix everything but it’ll get a smile out of you. That’s all he wants. You take that first bite and he sits at the ready. Even a little smirk would be good enough. Your lips move and then they start wobbling. Before he knows it, they’re scrunched up and silent tears run down your cheeks. He assumes he’s done more damage than good but, then, you smile up at him sadly with watery eyes and quietly thank him. Mikey can feel tears of his own blur his vision as he joins you. He’ll know the world is right when you can spend time together without crying over each other.
Bonus:
The Knowledgable Knight
You don’t even recognise the person you’re looking at despite it being you. This young dear, so bright-eyed and so unknowing to the terrors you carry with you. A version of you long bypassed from the two decades of war. They have so many questions they wish to ask - you can tell - but they hold back in fear of seeming insensitive. You almost find it funny given who they are.
When there is a moment alone, you only have one thing to say, “Life is precious, so lead yours reasonably and to the fullest, okay?”
They smile sadly and nod in understanding. They don’t need to know all of what you’ve gone through to know that life shouldn’t be taken advantage of. It’s a lesson to learn from yourself and, funny enough, yourself.
“And one other thing,” you continue, playfulness hinted with the light smirk on your face. “For the love of God, just tell him how you feel already. You never know if you might end up losing your chance.”
Your younger self goes wide-eyed and there’s practically steam coming off their face but they give you their promise with a raised thumb. You do the same and wish them all the best. Even if you’ve had a life of lost opportunities and lost love, that doesn’t mean the same needs to be true for you again. You watch them run off and glance around the room. Whilst you hold the pain of a future no longer to be, you can take solace in the fact that it won’t be repeated. The apocalypse can’t lay its wretched hands on anyone else. You sit down and let your weary bones rest, well and truly for the first time in years. A long breath washes out of you and, finally, you feel a sense of ease.
Maybe there is such a thing as second chances.
____________________
Hey! Hey, you! Yeah, you. Got a little message for ya!
There's no telling where life is going to go, what challenges it'll throw your way. We may be left with scars, or feeling hopeless. Sometimes our pain comes back to haunt us, or we lash out. Just know that it gets easier. We are all heroes of our own battles. We've lived to tell the tale and we are strong. Don't ever forget that. Keep your head held high and keep your loved ones close, whether that be family, friends, pets, or four awesome turtles <3
#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt 2020#rottmnt movie#rottmnt#rise tmnt#rise of the tmnt#rise of the turtles#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt x reader#rottmnt x reader#raphael#leonardo#donatello#michelangelo#rottmnt raphael#rottmnt leonardo#rottmnt donatello#rottmnt michelangelo#raph#leo#donnie#mikey#rottmnt raph#rottmnt leo#rottmnt donnie#rottmnt mikey#x reader#x future reader#tmnt headcanons
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Headcanons for mcyt x reader doing a cooking/baking stream together??
I love your writing!!!
<3
ooooo okay okay!!! yes of course bro ; also thank you!! I appreciate it sm 🫶🫶🫶🫶
MCYT ; cooking/baking stream
includes ; tommyinnit, ranboo, badlinu, nihachu, quackity, & foolish gamers
warnings ; language, grease fires
masterlist
TOMMYINNIT
you guys were making lasanga
Garfield jokes every five minutes
there's pasta sauce and cheese everywhere
he's constantly screaming to the viewers because you keep slapping him with the lasagna sheets, cooked or dry
"y/n! help! I'm being assaulted with lasagna sheets!"
he stained his shirt with pasta sauce 💀💀
almost set the house on fire bc he somehow left shit in the oven before preheating it
you turn on music halfway through and it turns into a karaoke stream
"CALIFORNIA GIRLS WERE UNFORGETTABLE-"
RANBOO
you were making soup because you found a good recipe you wanted to try
you accidently spilled the broth and covered your legs in it
he cut himself chopping up the celery (very minor cut dw)
"cooking stream? more like we injure ourselves for two hours stream"
"cooking stream? I hardly know her"
very chaotic but very good soup
during the intervals where you guys were just waiting for things to cook, you started a hashtag on Twitter to ask you guys stuff
and you answered them while keeping an eye on the food
afterwards you guys watch TV and eat your food while still streaming
"normalize eating on stream 2024!"
FREDDIE BADLINU
you were making breakfast for dinner on stream
you had to go use the bathroom while the bacon was cooking and left Freddie to tend to everything for less than a minute
and he started a grease fire.
after he got it extinguished he kinda just stood there waiting for you
meanwhile chat was exploding with panic and laughter
"Hey, y/n, I don't think we're having bacon tonight!"
"What the fuck happened???"
luckily no damage to anything other than the meat
the rest of it was really good though, and the stream had enough action for tonight 💀💀
NIKI NIHACHU
you guys were making cupcakes
you dropped like two eggs 💀💀💀 so while she was getting new ones you were cleaning up all the eggshell fragments and the insides
you got the camera to show stream your fucking mess and someone sent a dono saying "butterfingers ass"
the cackling after that 💀
you're able to get them into the oven though
and while you're waiting for them to cook, you watch dance moms and discuss everything wrong with it
commentary youtubers? I hardly know them
she begins making the icing while you pull the cupcakes out to let them cool
10/10 cupcakes they're amazing
you guys had a pride flag theme so lmao
ALEX QUACKITY
you were supposed to be making pancakes as a little challenge
his are literally raw and he put chocolate chips from the freezer straight in them
"that banana isn't gonna help anything"
"how do you know that??"
flour is everywhere. it looks like a war started
you put to much non-stick spray on the skillet and started a little fire
but Alex to the rescue dw
he couldn't even figure out how to use it and almost sprayed himself in the face!
goes on Twitter later to update that your kitchen was completely fine but the underneath of your microwave is a tiny bit melted
you blame him every time after that 💀💀
"my microwave melted a bit because you don't know how to use a fire extinguisher!"
"youre the one who used too much spray!"
chat always sides with you, too 😭😭
FOOLISH GAMERS
you thought making fried rice was a good idea? wrong
he literally has no idea what's happening
"can you make the scrambled eggs for me while I tend to the vegetables?"
"how many?"
"they're literally on the cabinet"
chat clipping every single funny moment too
"is the rice cooker even on? holy shit you left it on warm"
"I thought that meant it was on!"
"dude you've used this thing before, how long did it take for you to cook it?"
"like, forever"
"oh my god"
fried rice 10/10
he's complaining about the vegetables like he didn't have like two hours to say something about different veggies
#lowkeyrobin#mcyt x reader#mcyt preferences#mcyt oneshot#tommyinnit x reader#ranboo x reader#quackity x reader#badlinu x reader#freddie badlinu x reader#niki nihachu x reader#nihachu x reader#foolish gamers x reader
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Eddie x fem!reader. [vol I]
Summary: just a bit of Eddie’s shenanigans 😈
TW: no minors, angst, mentions of hard times.
W.C: 4.7k
A/N: hope you are all enjoy this! Thank you for all the love received on the first chapter 🥰
You spent the rest of the night questioning why you ever placed the ad in the paper to begin with. Certainly you could just go to sleep and you’d wake up to all of Eddie’s belongings gone because this was a nightmare.. right? Of course. You’d wake up any minute now and things would go back to the way they used to be.
////
//
-
Oh how you had hoped.
Eddie wearing your robe was just the tip of the iceberg of the stupid shit he would endure for the next 12 hours. After eating 7 slices of pizza, he wiped his greasy hands down the front of it. Settling for that instead of the arms of the couch after you had scolded him. He talked during the entire episode of The Nanny.
“Holy shit, she’s hot, I mean her voice is kinda nasally but woooowwweeeee.. you think she’s into metalheads? I bet she is. I bet she’d love to be wrapped all up in me, it'd be a secret though for her.” He talked with his mouth full, bits of cheese and pizza sauce flying from his lips and landing on his naked chest. His feet were propped up on the coffee table, toes wiggling like he was a child watching cartoons. “Got any chips? I’m hungry.”
He left a mess wherever he went. The chips he begged you for were still sitting open on the couch. Crumbs decorated the upholstery like confetti at a New Year’s Eve party. His pizza plate on the coffee table, holding an impressive amount of beer cans. Instead of hanging your robe back up on its proper hook in the bathroom, he left it on the floor in between the living room and the hallway. You had gone to bed after he insisted on belching “Love Bites” with three beers tucked between his legs. It was at this moment you thought of begging Steve and Robin to move in with you instead.
“For the last time, I refuse to try to out burp you, I will not be duct taping beers to my hands, and for the love of god if you get salsa on the carpet I will skin you alive.”
“It puts the lotion on its skin….”
You stomp to bed, slamming your bedroom door and throwing the covers over your head. You can hear Eddie slurring through your bedroom walls.
“C’mon Tooooty, I thought we were having a slumber party. You didn’t even paint my nails yet!” His small hiccuping giggles turn into a roar of laughter lasting entirely too long.
-
The next morning you wake up to your alarm, it’s peaceful, content. Today is a new day and you have a busy schedule working at the salon. Saturdays are easily the most hectic at Josie’s. It seems it’s the only day off for most people to come in and get their hair done. You dress in a simple black tank top tucked into a black mini skirt, a form fitting denim vest over top, and black chunky slide sandals. Spritzing yourself with your Exclamation perfume you just have to brush your teeth and grab a little breakfast.
Upon opening your bedroom door you are hit with a stench so ungodly, it makes the hair stand up on your arms. Did a fucking tornado crash through your home? How hard were you sleeping? You felt like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz only in reverse, while she was mystified by the sights around her you were full of rage, disgust, and sheer anger.
Eddie.
For fucks sake it is almost as if he needed a goddamn babysitter.
Beer cans litter the floor. A silver ball made of duct tape was sitting on the couch, the small tv was still on. All your VHS’s were scattered along the floor by the entertainment center. A plate of what looked like hardened shredded cheese was balancing on the edge of the coffee table. Rolling papers, and two joints were piled on top of it, along with various baggies of god knows what. Chips were ground into the carpet, their sharp edges making the carpet glitter with nacho cheese and tortilla shrapnel. And sitting opened and probably now dry, was the blue nail polish you had gotten with Robin. The whole place reeked of the dirty rotten scent of spilled stale beer soaking cotton fabric, the remnants of weed wafting from the furniture baking into the fibers from the sun streaming through the windows in lazy strips of golden yellow.
Homicide is probably what? 10 years? You could manage that.
You make your way into the culprits room, swearing under your breath and feeling the sweat start on the back of your neck. Pushing through the heap of clothes and worn boots, you find the prince of trash laying on his back, soft snores escaping his slack mouth. There aren’t even sheets on his mattress, just mountains of his belongings.
A beer is taped crudely to his left hand, your brand new bottle of jergens lays next to him along with a playboy— flipped open to a brunette with obvious fake tits and her lips placed into an orgasm. He apparently threw some boxers on during his midnight raccoon shenanigans.
This is comparable to bringing home a dog from the humane society, you aren’t sure how they’ll act but once you go to sleep— all hell breaks lose.
“Eddie,” you yell, loud enough that your own ears are ringing. He doesn’t move a muscle, just a loud snore erupting from him. You kick at his legs, push his body around but nothing. If it weren’t for the snoring you probably should have called a coroner.
One last slap against his bare chest and he finally groans, “gimme five more minutes baby and I promise I’ll rock your world.” Jesus Christ.
Fuck it, just go to work, you can deal with him when you get home. Breath in and out. Nope— the fuse that was lit in your brain from Eddie’s mess inches its way slowly towards the dynamite, licking up the wick. Also like a dog from the shelter, they need to be trained, told when they are doing something wrong, and immediately corrected.
Filling a cup with cold water you waltz back into his room a smile plastered to your lips.
The splash of water against Eddie’s face is music to your ears as he gasps for breath. Spluttering and sitting up, spilling the beer taped to his hand, he looks like a cat that was thrown in the tub, long curls soaking wet, his bangs parted and thrown back from the force of the water hitting him.
“Damn sweetheart, I said give me five minutes and I’d give you all ten inches of my co—” the plastic cup bounces off of Eddie’s head. “Okay, ow. Goddamn what was that for?!”
“What was that for?! Look around Eddie!” You motion around the house as he stands up holding his head and pressing the palm of his right hand into his eye, dragging it down his face to wipe the remnants of cold water away, “this place is disgusting!”
You begin to list off everything wrong, as you walk around the house, Eddie following begrudgingly behind you, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. You point out the chips in the carpet, the hardened cheese plate, the vhs mess. Each and everything you show him your voice gets higher and higher and louder and louder. The rage bubbling up in your body as you huff around. A large hand and the odd sensation of a rubbery plastic mass spin you around, holding onto your shoulders.
Eddie’s face is so close to yours, you can see the sun reflecting off the usual darkened browns of his eyes, bringing a goldmine to the muddy surface.
“Tooty— it’s far too early for this shit,” he speaks slowly, the Cheshire Cat like grin on his stupid face spreads across his lips revealing his straight white teeth, “you need to relax a little bit.” He notices the weight of the beer can and tips it back into his mouth, chugging the rest of it and smacking his lips when he’s done. Adding a deafening belch upwards to the ceiling.
You curl your lip in disgust and shove his arm off of you. “What? Hair of the dog baby, gotta keep drinking to avoid a hangover.”
Crossing your arms and taking a step back from him, you take a deep breath, “I don’t know how you lived in the trailer park, and frankly— I don’t give a fuck—but, you will not, make a mess of my house. Either, clean this shit up before I get home from work, or I’ll personally move your crap out to the lawn. Got it?”
His smile fades, and his eyebrows pull together, eyes squinted. The hum of the ceiling fan is the only noise in the house. “Are you threatening me at 7:30 in the morning?” he asks, checking his watch, towering over you. No doubt he is trying to freak you out.
It takes everything in you to not slap him upside the head.
You stand your ground, not letting his carved jaw and mean eyed demeanor get the best of you.
“Damn right I am. I’ll have your shit lying on the lawn like a horrendous Halloween yard sale. Just because the whole town thinks you're some psycho, bastard doesn’t mean I do— you don’t scare me, Munson,” his surname falling from your lips like agent orange, thick and heavy painting the air around you both. Your head held high, eyes glaring back into his. His bravado falters and he also crosses his arms, matching your energy.
“Maybe you should pull the stick out of your ass before it splinters, babe.” Eddie chides back, lips spreading manically across his face.
Neither of you will let the other win, and if you didn’t have to go to work, you would stand here all day arguing with him. You poke a manicured nail into his chest. “You owe me a new bottle of lotion.” With that you push past him and make your way into the bathroom to finish getting ready.
“It was either that or the mayonnaise, sweetheart!”
-
You had always found comfort working at Josie’s. She had taken you on immediately after finishing Cosmetology school at Empire Beauty School in Indianapolis, giving you full time hours and helping you buy your supplies. Nancy had dropped down to part time, working for both the Hawkins Post and cutting hair on the side. Josie was like an older sister to you, and you loved her dearly.
After doing matching perm sets on a mother and daughter, a trim on your regular client, Audrey, and catching up with the latest gossip from Molly about her date that ended with them making out in his car—it was time for your lunch break.
The leftover half of a tuna salad sandwich stared you down from its cellophane wrapper, begging you to ingest the soggy yet stale bread. A stomach ache waiting to happen. Tossing it into the trash, you settle for Marlboro menthols and a Diet Coke. The sun is high in the sky, begging you to enjoy it.
You shed your vest as you sit on the back patio, leaning your head against the neon pink and white striped plastic pool chair lounger, stretching your legs out and kicking off your sandals. You accept the sun’s rays into your skin. Sunglasses poised on your face and a cigarette tucked between your mauve painted lips, you pretend you’re in a movie.
But you’re not— you’re in the middle of Butthole, Indiana. The only exciting thing that happened here was the possibility of hearing the latest town gossip about someone’s cousin, friend, or ex getting knocked up by the high school football star.
You longed for a day off where you and Robin could enjoy the once luxurious but not desolate woods of Lover’s Lake. Nothing but the peaceful breeze to fill your mind and the light rustle of the leaves.
Nancy pulled the blue matching chair up next to you, curling her legs beneath her as you silently pull your lighter from your pocket and hand it to her. A small cloud of smoke dances around your face as she lights her cigarette inhaling deeply.
“Ready for the honeymoon?” You ask her as she inches her way down the seat, a slight squeak to the rubbery plastic as she settles her body in.
Nancy and Jonathan had gotten married two months ago. The wedding was pristine and beautiful in typical Nancy fashion. Her glorious curls in a French twist, soft tendrils framing her youthful face. A pearl colored lace gown billowing behind her and sleeves puffed around her shoulders with dainty lace decorating down her delicate wrists. She looked incredible.
You cried standing beside Holly and El in your peach colored satin gowns, wiping your eyes when they read their nuptials, vowing to be together during sickness and in health. Will, Argyle, and Mike stood beside Jonathan trying like hell to stand upright as the bachelor party spilled into the midnight hours, Mike, paler than usual and Will, drenched with sweat under the beaming lights of the church. Argyle was the only one smiling through the entire ceremony, moving his head to the rhythm of the organ.
Karen had wept and gathered you into a tight hug for helping style the bridal party’s hair that morning, and for being such a wonderful roommate to Nancy. Ted checked his watch every half hour, and kept an eye on the punch which seemingly looked to get darker and darker throughout the night.
Joyce and Hopper held each other close and danced slow to every song played. Their undying love for one another evident on their faces.
A very drunk Murray Bauman hollered obscenities behind the bar, obviously taking advantage of the open bar night as he mixed drinks for the Wheeler and Byer wedding guests, heavy on the liquor. It wasn’t until grandma Wheeler grabbed the mic and started singing Frank Sinatra that someone caught on to Murray’s antics.
You had danced and laughed along with your high school classmates all night, spilling champagne and beer onto the community center floor, the bottom of
Nancy’s dress turned an ugly smoke gray. It was a perfect summer wedding, one that all of Hawkins would be talking about for years to come.
Nancy stretched her back and twisted her neck to look at you, blue eyes peering over round colored lenses, “Yes, I can’t wait to dip my toes in the ocean,” she says beaming, “we’ve been going to the pool pretty often these last few weeks trying to tan Jonathan a little bit so he doesn’t burn like a piece of bread in Cancun.”
A giggle bubbles on her lips as you laugh along with her. “Any luck on finding a roommate?”
You had been dreading this conversation. Originally you had hoped that Erica Sinclair or even Max would maybe want to be your roommate. Sadly they were both either starting college or finishing up their degree this year—Lucas turned down a full ride basketball scholarship to be with Max. Even the boys had places to go. Dustin and Suzy were finishing their summer internships and moving in together—he had plans on proposing after summer’s end. Will lived in Indianapolis, he became a teacher’s aid after finishing his Bachelor’s in Fine Arts, hoping to one day become a professor. Mike and El lived in Hopper’s cabin, tucked deep in the woods. Celebrating being together for almost 10 years. It was quite literally just you— single, and desperate for a roommate.
“Yeah— I uhh— they moved in last night actually,” you said through a wall of smoke nonchalantly. Lighting another cigarette to power through this conversation.
Nancy is picking at her cuticles and flipping through Cosmo as she asks who answered the ad.
A nervous laugh surpasses your lips, “Eddie,” you say in almost a question.
Nancy stops moving entirely. The ash from her cigarette threatening it’s length. She shakes her head and corrects herself, “Sorry, I think I had a stroke… did you say Eddie? As in Eddie Munson?”
You throw your arm over your eyes and slip further into the chair, hoping it would swallow you whole. A groan escapes your lips followed by your confirmation.
“There was no one else! Everyone is off at school, or getting engaged— he was the only one to show up and look at the house! Plus he forked out more cash than I had originally been asking for so obviously he can afford the rent.”
“Probably drug money,” Nancy coughed.
“Honestly I don’t care if he robbed a bank, the money is there and right now—” the threat of what your life could become stings like a wasp in your brain, red ink showing final notice, light switches not working due to the electricity being shut off, before Eddie moved in— you were well on your way to that lifestyle. “that is what matters.”
Nancy huffs in disagreement, taking a breath to settle her nerves. “I don’t know him personally— but just be careful. Wait, wasn’t he friends with—”
“Yup.” You quip, tight lipped and short, “Robin and Steve know him too.”
“That's what I had thought, well at least he’s not like, a total stranger then.”
Nancy listens intently to the horrors of the past 24 hours at the house she once lived in. Twisting her wedding ring around her small fingers, she had never been more thankful to be married.
-
The work day ended later than you had hoped, a last minute client showed up begging for a “quick perm” — as if there were such a thing. You waved goodbye as you reminded her of the strict no washing policy when it came to maintaining her curls in place. You sweep the floor in a rush and place your combs and scissors in the blue barbicide. Putting away the perm rods and wiping down the surfaces. Switching over the laundry so at least the towels would be dry by the time you opened on Monday morning.
You were tired and your back felt a little stiff. You shut off the radio, still humming Material Girl, to yourself as you turned off the lights and locked the door.
The drive home was short, your small Ford escort a blur through the streets of Hawkins. You could hear your bed calling you, maybe you’d make yourself a grilled cheese and do some laundry so you wouldn’t have to do it tomorrow. But when you pulled into your driveway you realized you wouldn’t be relaxing at all tonight.
The garage door was pulled open, a makeshift banner with red and black spray painted letters on it spelled out “Corroded Coffin”, a better glance at it and you could see it was the same pattern as your spare bed sheets that you kept in the linen closet. The garbage cans were moved out of the way and tossed into the front yard. Cords from amps and a microphone were plugged into every outlet your small garage could offer. A drum set was in the back beside the shelf that held old paint cans full of lead. The floppy blond haired idiot slammed a Busch Light as he twirled a drumstick in his hand. Two members of the band were head banging along to the guitar solo that Eddie was plucking away at. His fingers moved fluidly over the fretboard. Years of practice evident in the dexterity of his hands. The muscles in his arms tight and flexed, veins protruding around them. There were beer cans scattered all around them. Another dirty thirty, no doubt. Fries were spilling out of empty fast food bags and greasy burger wrappers were littering the ground. The push mower was laying on its side, in the middle of the driveway. The rake snapped in half.
The slam of your car door goes unheard.
The unhinged quirk of your jaw starts to ache as you clench your teeth, stomping towards the garage band. The guitar solo ends just as you get to the garage. They’re all hollering and cheering as Eddie whips his head back, long sweaty strands of his curls whipping around as he tries to catch his breath. Holding the beer at arms length, he pours it into his mouth, light amber colored lager flowing down his chin and the expanse of his neck.
“Fuckin’ told you Jeff,” Eddie says, throwing the beer to the ground at the other guitarists feet, “don’t matter if its been five or fifteen years— I can still play that Master of Puppets solo.” A smug smile spreads across his mouth as he pulls a joint from his back pocket, and lights it between lips.
Jeff swings his guitar off his neck and places it on one of the amps, “yeah, yeah whatever man— you gonna share that or just keep gloating?”
You are standing on the driveway, hands on your hips, weight balancing on one leg, the other straight out, foot tapping in annoyance, waiting for the band of rejects to notice your throat clearing.
“Tooty!” They all yell in unison.
Your expression doesn’t fade. Jaw unhinged, lips pressed together tightly. The icy cold of your stare burrowing into Eddie’s beer and sweat soaked skin, a hazy film around him as he exhales the joint.
“Aww, sweetheart, what’s the matter?” He says with fake concern, a smirk curled on his lips, “you mad you missed the jam sesh?” Eddie croons, the tip of the joint goes red as he inhales again and passes it to Jeff, “don’t worry we do this every other night I’m sure you’ll catch the next one.”
The garage fills with echoing drunk laughs and the asshole on the drums hits a ba dum tss. Causing Eddie to choke on his exhale and start a coughing fit. He’s doubled over laughing as he forces the smoke from his lungs.
“Not here you’re not.”
He looks from you to the guys, all four dumbstruck by your words.
“Please tell me, Tooty, why I, a paying resident of this house,” he says, gesturing wildly around him, taking long legged steps towards you, head dipping and turning to catch your gaze, “am not ‘allowed’ to practice with my band, in a garage that we share?”
He’s lowering his head down to you, the ends of his sweaty curls licking your cheeks as he closes the gap between you, rubbing a hand across his chin, that same smirk on his face as always.
“Hmm?”
You let out an exhausted sigh. After a long day at work the only thing you had wanted to do was relax— not deal with Eddie’s antics.
“I’m not going to entertain your little half-witted dreams from middle school on being the next Kirk Hammett— find somewhere else to play rockstar, and get this shit out of here.”
You shove past him and the band as you stomp through the door leading into the kitchen, hanging up your keys. A quick look around made your head spin.
The house looked worse now than it did when you left for work. Dishes piled along each surface on the counters and into the sink, the microwave was open with what looked like the remnants of a spaghetti-o explosion, a beer can pyramid was starting in the living room. A burnt aluminum pan of jiffy pop sat on the stove, charred on the bottom. The trash bag suitcases Eddie had packed his belongings with, were now thrown in between his room and the hallway.
You were fed up with this bullshit, it had been 24 hours and he was already on your last nerve. Dragging both hands down your face in sheer fatigue, you grab a roll of trash bags from under the sink. Walking heavy footed back to the door, making as much noise as possible, you fling open the door, four pairs of wide eyes stare you down as you shake open the garbage bag.
“Here, let me help you because apparently you don’t have any common fucking sense.” You stomp over to Eddie and rip another bag free from the roll and toss it to him.
In the best condescending tone you can muster you explain, “This, is a garbage bag. Oooh, ahhh. Cool right? See? When you are done with something and it’s empty,” you educate the gaggle of degenerates, “you pick it up, and throw it away! Wow.” You demonstrate for them, picking up an empty can of beer and placing it in the bag.
“See how easy that is? Now,” you say turning towards Eddie your eyes lost of any endearment, “Do you think you big boys could handle that? Or do you need written instructions?”
A scoff is heard from behind you, as it’s now your turn to smirk, stomping back up the steps and into the kitchen, slamming the door hard behind you.
-
Huffing and puffing, you know that the house will never get clean if you don’t do it yourself. You change into a faded Hawkins High shirt and a pair of old worn cotton shorts with paint smears on the hips from when you and Nancy tackled painting the living room last summer, as you set to work on the kitchen. Pulling on a pair of rubber yellow gloves, you make work on cleaning the mess Eddie had made. The soft hum of your kitchen radio plays as Pearl Jam invades the background. You first fill the sink with the hottest water the faucet allowed, dousing the dishes with dish soap. You’re carrying around the garbage can, picking up empty beer cans, cigarette butts, and the charcoal mess of black popcorn on the the stove.
You don’t hear him enter the kitchen, your mind far away to another time, when Nancy lived with you and the only problem she caused was paying rent a week early. He advances towards you and stops in front of you, nostrils flaring as he takes a deep breath.
“What’s your fuckin’ problem? You can be a bitch to me all you want, but the guys don’t deserve that.”
You set the garbage can down by your feet, a rubber glove shoved into his chest, “If you think I give a fuck about what they deserve, you are sadly mistaken! I deserve to not have my house completely trashed every time I turn my back!”
“I didn’t know I was living in a fucking convent, Sister Tooty.” Eddie argues, proud of his comeback he leans against the counter, arms folded across his chest, “that why you never get laid?”
You roll your eyes, “fucking yourself with a beer can taped to your hand isn’t exactly getting laid, Munson. But keep it up, you won’t be living here for long if you keep acting like a fucking pig!”
“Again, with your empty threats, sweetheart. Isn’t it tiring being so mad all the time— careful, looks Iike you’re already getting wrinkles.” A throaty laugh escapes his mouth and he sweeps his thumb between your eyebrows, trying to joke around and diffuse the tension growing between you both.
You swat your hands at him and pull away, a look of disgust and frustration planted on your face.
“Jesus,” he says irritated, “Harrington told me that your family moved away— didn’t know it was because you’re such a stone-cold bitch.”
Without even thinking, you shove him hard in the chest. He goes crashing backwards, the rest of the cluttered items on the counter cascade to the floor with loud thuds. Your cheeks are heated, and your eyes glisten with tears, but you won’t give him the satisfaction of seeing them fall. You look at your socked feet and back up to him. Your lip quivering, head held high.
His expression is stunned, not angry like you thought he would be. A look of worry washes over his face as he realizes he crossed the line. Anger ran its course as he recognizes that he hurt you.
“Ah fuck,” he breathes, putting his head down and shaking his long mane. He looks back up to your face, still steady, not daring to let those traitorous tears fall.
“Tooty, I’m— I’m sorry.”
You pluck off your rubber gloves and toss them to the counter, making a dash to the bathroom and locking the door. Eddie doesn’t hear your crying, drowned out from the shower head as he starts to clean up his mess.
vol iii
—
A/N: thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed! If your name is crossed out on the Taglist it means your settings are more than likely set to private and you’re not allowed to be tagged!
Tag list: @tlclick73 @sweetsweetjellybean @bbyhargrove @sidthedollface2 @eddiesguitarskills @manda-panda-monium @luna-munson83 @sinczir @icequeen1371 @stephywxphy @aol19 @munsonzlsvr @2lekk @thirddeadlysin @sevikasblackgf @whenshelanded @b-irock @daleyeahson @alanamarie @ijustwanttoreadsmutttt @emmalee-01 @justsheerfilth1 @mynameismothra @1weirdbitch @emma77645 @aysheashea @kaitlynnlo @micheledawn1975 @iheartyouyou @xladyluna15x @awhoreforeddiemunson @fallinginlovewithqueue @notdeadnotalive @seventhlevelofhell @belleoftheba11 @secretdryrose @harlowsgirl @gloryekaterina @veravee-blog @leahjean @Ifaewrites @amestbr @lunatictardis @munson-blurbs @corroded-hellfire @agentmarvel @ghost-proofbaby @jo-harrington @abibliophobiaa @josephfakingquinn @bimbobaggins69 @loveshotzz @jadequeen88 @joejoequinnquinn @divamatrixx @myosotisa @boomhauer @br0ck-eddie @avalon-wolf
#eddie x fem!reader#eddie x y/n#Eddie x you#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson fanfiction#eddie munson angst#eddie munson fluff#eddie munson x f!reader#roommate!eddie#roommate!eddie munson
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highlights from the dropout anthony padilla/courtney miller interview! (aka things i liked or didnt know)
ally IMMEDIATELY kicking us off by introducing themselves as vic michaelis and dabbing so softly
ally ALSO IMMEDIATELY kicking us off by calmly answering the 'tell us about yourself' question with "ive been testing positive for covid for about 3 weeks now" "is that true?" "of COURSE NOT OH MY GOD??"
ally calls the covid vaccine the "Fauci-ouchie"
its been 1 minute into the video
VIC LYING ABOUT THEIR FAVORITE COLOR FOR NO REASON
its been TWO minutes into the video
ALLY HIJACKING HER ATTEMPT TO ASK AGAIN BY MOVING ONTO THE TRANSITION THEMSELF
ok we're locking in locking in
everyone needs to hear the ally wrongpile beardsley story at least once <3
vic was 100% in on sam's vision for dropout and ally COULD not have been more full of doubt.
all of them saying a contemplative 'ooooo' when asked if they miss sketches and then a beat afterwards vic immediately bursting out with 'sketch is dead i hate sketch. anyway-"
IFY MOO DENG MENTION
ify talking about how close and interconnected the cast is and was off screen since way back
"noo c'mon c'mon those are those pale clammy little hands i love so much 🥺" "theyre DRY AS A BONE"
vic's "I just dont ever think that anyone is thinking about me. like i am thinking about myself 100% more than anyone else is thinking about me"
vic thought it was crazy when they got asked to host VIP because she felt too new for it despite having a lot of experience
ally thinks its funny to make each other do the thing theyre known for but also they agree brennan is just that analytical about every topic and birds are not special KHADGKASJDF
vic and ify enthusiastically agreeing with the above LMAO
vic plays a character of herself while ify performs very close to his actual self
'is the broke comedian bit real' all of them immediately exaggeratedly laughing and looking away and going NOOO WE'RE FINEEE WE'RE FINEEE
ally's analogy of watering a plant that has been dead for a long time and how they might be doing good but the water has a lot of past cracks to fill in which i dont know enough about plants to tell if this is an accurate analogy but its an effective one
money-wise, the tide has turned for the better for them in the last few years 🥺
dropout did profit-share last year! vic cried 🥺
ify "i was there when youtube was created by a couple of guys" GOOGLE HOW OLD IS YOUTUBE. ONLY 19??????
ally needing clarification on if he was actually THERE when it was created or not
ify talking about how more people in the industry are recognizing him FROM dropout things
THE EDITORS ACTUALLY USING THE CLIP OF ALLY'S DAB AS A TRANSITION
vic "10 years ago if you told me i could actually make money from doing improv and my reaction was anything other than 'holy shit thats incredible' i would like murder myself. i would throw myself into a trash can"
immediate no's on "do you feel like you have to share your personal lives on camera" because they just like oversharing
"oh you grew up mormon too?" "no but i just LOVE 💞🥰 the mormons"
"studio CE shoutout. dont shout them out actually. well, you can if you want to."
some great takes on parasocial relationships
ify thinks his audience are the kinky poly folks. can we get a shout from the kinky poly folks!
ify pointing right at the camera and saying "IF you are at a sex party and i introduce myself as IFY do NOT give me your fake stage name. you are saying my REAL GOVERNMENT name here"
ally bringing up chappell roan in the parasocial relationships discussion yoooo
ify doing a voice imitation of his uncle suggesting he do jokes for a relative's graduation KHAGKAJKAKJDFSD
the horror on all their faces when courtney says they're lucky that fans dont ask them to do something funny in public when they meet them
grilled cheese scale: ify's are solid. ally is a good cook but they're allergic to bread, vic inconclusive
vic loves the joke of being called vehicular and would change their government name to it even LMAO
izzy roland shoutout!!!!!
ify's sex dungeon would also be where he paints warhammer minis.
"what is your favorite thing that he did" "...anthony?" "yeah" "th. this? this channel? this right here?"
SZA talked about ify on VIP in a variety article???
SZA INTENTIONALLY DRESSED UP LIKE IFY WAS ON VIP?????
this is like the first time i saw mxmtoon commented on zac's instagram except magnified by a hundred
"Grimes if you're watching this, slide into the DMs"
ally fanning themselves going "thats actually too hot i simply need to go" hearing that lana del rey graduated studying philosophy with an emphasis in metaphysics
everyone at this table ships ally beardsley and lana del rey
nice to know ify and em are still together!
"do you consider yourself an angel of death? i consider myself an angel of death for network television" vic talking about how theyve been on SO many second-to-last episodes of shows that were canceled 😭
Super fun and insightful!!!! we dont get to see these three vibe together much on screen 🥺 video under cut!
youtube
#dropout#dropout.tv#dropout tv#ify nwadiwe#vic michaelis#ally beardsley#anthony padilla#interview hightlights time again!!!#these guys are so fun they were having so much fun#Youtube
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For the writing prompts I think 56 and 58 could be cute together ☺️
SO TRUE, those would go perfect together
56. "Just marry me already." 58. "Did I just say that out loud?"
"god, will you just... marry me already?"
there is no way steve heard that right. no way. eddie's got his mouth full of lasagna, pasta sauce smeared across his lips and chin, a fork in one hand and a breadstick in the other, mopping up sauce and cheese from his plate. with his mouth full like that, steve could have misheard him.
"what?" he asks anyway, his voice coming out a little breathless.
"oh fuck, did i just say that out loud?"
"did i... hear you right? did you just propose to me in our kitchen? over some fucking lasagna?"
"ah, fuck," eddie says, his shoulders slumping a little. he puts his fork down, shoves the last of the breadstick in his mouth, and swipes his napkin over the bottom half of his face. "listen. this wasn't how i wanted to do that."
he's still talking with his fucking mouth full. steve's head is swimming at the admissions and eddie is still talking with his mouth full.
"how... how did you want to do that? you want to do that?"
"yes, okay? yes. fuck. now it's..." eddie lets loose an explosive sigh. "now it's ruined. i was gonna wait. not long just, like. spring, probably. i swear to god i was gonna do it right, stevie. steak dinner, wine, fancy restaurant where you need reservations - all of it."
"you wanna marry me?"
"of course i wanna marry you. do you... do you wanna marry me?"
"yeah... yeah, i wanna marry you."
it takes steve by surprise, the honesty in his own words. for a long time, marriage was the goal. and then with the way life kept handing him monster after supernatural monster, steve figured he probably wouldn't live long enough to get married. and then... him and eddie... and eddie never really seemed like the marrying type. steve had resigned himself to never being able to have that.
and then robin and nance had that ceremony last year. it wasn't exactly... legally binding, but it got steve thinking again. it got steve thinking about him and eddie, a ceremony like robin and nancy's, tuxes and rings and vows and celebrating their love with all their friends.
and eddie's been thinking about it too apparently. holy shit.
"okay, so. i didn't do it right. but. steve, i wanna marry you. we can have a ceremony like -"
"like robin and nance," steve finishes, and eddie's face splits into a smile.
"yeah. sorry i didn't... do it right."
steve laughs. "who cares? when has any part of our relationship been traditional?"
"never," eddie smiles. "i love you."
"i love you too, eds."
"love me so much you're gonna be my husband."
"yeah. and you love me so much you're gonna be mine."
help me beat my writing slump
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It's always like, a sandwich can't be that good, it's just a sandwich, then you're eating one like, holy fuck a sandwich
I mean, I am a devoted sandwich lover. I love sandwiches laden with vegetables; I love wraps with tofu; I love warm tuna melts and subs stuffed with broccoli and open-faced sandwiches heavy with tomatoes and ricotta. I've got sandwiches for summer (camembert, arugula and apple) and sandwiches for winter (chorizo patty melt with pickled jalapenos). Even just a regular old grilled cheese can be elevated with a green and garlick-y spread.
So really, at any given moment my default state is probably holy fuck, a sandwich, regardless of how long it's been since I last ate one.
#I love sandwiches. that's what you should take away from this.#also I have personally made all those sandwiches and they're great so definitely try if you also like sandwiches.#no love sincerer than the love of food
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(18+!!)
this warm weather's really getting to my head...
so just imagine, it's a nice warm day, bordering on hot
and so you decide to wear short shorts that hug each curve and lump perfectly, and a cute crop top that frames your boobs nicely
and you meet the gang for a little picnic get together, which includes eddie and steve in attendance
and while you're having fun and enjoying the tasty dishes your friends have made, poooor eddie and steve can't stop admiring your body
the way your boobs bounce and jiggle each time you laugh at one of robin's quips, the way your butt presses against your heels as you sit up in excitement as nancy tells you about a groundbreaking story she's working on, the way your lips wrap around the straw of your lemonade, the sinful way you lick your fingers after eating a piece of fresh, juicy fruit
they're both going insane
they give each other a look that, although they've never shared it before, they both understand what the other means
what the other needs
they excuse themselves to go to the bathroom, nobody paying any attention as you've proposed a game of badminton
despite the disgusting nature of a park bathroom, neither man really care to notice as they each race into a stall
the sound of zippers unzipping and the jingling of belts and buttons echoes in the empty room
in unison, they pull down their pants and underwear, eddie hissing at the cold air now touching his most private area and steve groaning at the glorious feeling of freedom
they both grasp their dicks and begin stroking, each of them softly whining and humming every once in a while
if one were to walk by, they'd mistake it for singing
steve opens his hand with his dick sitting in the middle of his palm and spits
eddie strokes his precum all down his length
"ohhhhh, jesus christ", eddie breathes
"i know...holy shit", steve replies
"wanna know somethin?" steve grunts in response "this isn't the first time i've done something like this over her"
"ohhhh, i definitely have before", steve chuckles
both of them speed up their movements, private exclamations of curse words and your name leave their lips
"fuck...im so fucking close....how the hell does she have this much power?"
"mmmm, i have no idea...but if this what she does without knowing...ffuuck...imagine what she's like trying to get us off intentionally", steve whispers
eddie chuckles, imagining you in the stall with him, showing him anything he needs to make him cum
steve imagines your hand in place of his as he holds you up against him so you don't have to touch the disgusting floor or stall
in sync, they both prop their arms against a stall wall, heaving with clenched shut eyes
"oh christ, im bout to-"
"oh im right there too"
they both moan as they feel their climaxes
eddie can't open his eyes, too far gone in bliss. his tongue sticks out a bit as he milks his cock for all that it's worth, hearing his seed spill into the toilet water below with little splashes. he feels his balls sway with each tug he gives and he can only dream of how they'd feel slamming against your ass
steve tosses his head back, mouth open. he can't be bothered checking if his aim is right because he could care less about painting the toilet prettily. he'd rather be painting you with his cum. he fucks his hand with his dick, imagining his hips bouncing against yours as he buries himself as deep as he can go inside you
both men give a few shakes of their dicks before flushing the toilets (although steve attempts to wipe his cum off of the seat with the cheap toilet paper before giving up)
they redress themselves and exit their stalls, avoiding eye contact with one another when they wash their hands
as they walk back over to their friends, you turn and wave at them
"geez, what took you so long? i thought one of you might've fallen in", you giggle
"ugh, it was the cheese we got, wasn't it?", robin groans. "ya know, for a guy who's lived a more luxurious life than the rest of us, it's embarrassing you can't handle fancy cheese, dingus..."
nancy rolls her eyes as she sets up to serve the shuttlecock again
you turn away from the guys, completely unaware it was you who had done them in...
#eddie munson#eddie stranger things#eddie munson x reader#steve harrington#steve stranger things#steve harrington x reader#stranger things#st4#steve harrington smut#eddie munson smut
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Recent chapters of the underrated Fate spinoff Fate/type Redline got me in my feelings so I had to talk about it at lengths, even moreso now that it hasn't updated in months (the mangaka, Ryouji Hirano, has health problems I believe). Spoilers obviously.
Now, when I call type Redline, "underrated", it's more of a subjective than objective assessment. Despite being a manga and thus far more accessible than the untranslated visual novels or light novel series of TYPE-MOON, I see it discussed fairly rarely. At the very least, as far as I know, there hasn't been much big posts analyzing it, so I believe this should be one of the first.
Just don't expect something really deep, these are mostly my musing, rambling observations.
In fact, for a long time, I didn't really have a well-articulated thought about Redline's themes. The contrast of a Holy Grail War taking place in the middle of a world war simply had me chalk it up to the tried and true "war is hell" and not think any deeper (which was a bit intellectually lazy of me). And there is certainly that, but it's a bit more elaborate than that, or else I wouldn't find Redline as interesting. And it all reached a thematic "climax" of sorts in the recent chapter as of the time of writingé
In reality, the story signaled its central theme from the very start, I just wasn't paying attention. One of the first chapters ends with this page:
At first, I thought this was just about Nobunaga. But it turns out this specific page and its text will become the precursor of how the manga is going to present Servants, and how this presentation fits into its larger representation of what war is.
Something you hear somewhat frequently when people mention Redline is "it made Servants scary again". It is only half true, Servants have usually only been "scary" in specific circumstances (Bluebeard in FZ, True Assassin in FSN, and Jackie in Apo come to mind). What they actually mean is that Redline shows Servants as above human again, and it does so by showing them brutally go through lots and lots of human bodies, when Fate is usually about Servants fighting each other. You see Servants vs. humans sometimes, but it's usually 1v1 deals. The only notable exception I can think of is Clan Calatin against Alcides in strange Fake.
There is also Apocrypha, but they are up against armies of homunculi, golems, and animated skeletons, so the dynamic is a bit different than with modern armies. It does however say this.
Indeed, Lancer of Red could burn to ash and crush the stakes with his flames and divine spear. But the Red camp's odds of successfully opposing the Black camp's overwhelming amount of material resources were fifty-fifty. Fighting a force of twenty thousand was beyond the capacities of even a mighty Heroic Spirit. Even then, there would have been no problems if they were alive, but right now they were Servants. The more they consumed prana in great quantities, the closer they approached death. (Apocrypha volume 2 ch.2)
Which is interesting in light of Redline's story, but I digress.
But here, in Redline, because it's during the Second World War, and members of the military are using Servants to do their bidding as well as planning to use them to win the war, there are a lot of interactions between Servants and modern human armies, usually violent ones, to catastrophic results, as Servants go through lots of human meat like cheese. The picture above is after Oda Nobunaga shoots down an entire fleet of American planes heading to Japan.
It's a type of interactions we only ever really saw when Berserker Lancelot in Zero overtook a JSDF fighter jet to fight Gilgamesh on Vimana, while the other plane got eaten by the Lovecraftian horror Caster summoned. The militarized forces of Faldeus in FsF mostly only go after human mages and steer clear of Servants.
And that makes for an interesting contrast that Redline is all too happy to highlight time and time again. When they say "Servants are scary", they mean "Servants are above human", in every sense of terms. No normal human can harm them or even pose a challenge to them, for they are above human strength and capabilities: they are superhuman, they are inhuman.
And that does not just mean inhuman power, but also inhuman thinking.
One of the main conflict throughline of the manga is the relationship between Kanata Akagi, our main protagonist, and his Servant Okita. They don't clash as such, it's not like Fate route Shirou hindering Saber from doing her job, nor is it like Kiritsugu disregarding Saber. It's more low-key, like a misunderstanding that can never be solved. Okita was a warrior in life, and this Holy Grail War in war-torn Japan is just another battlefield to her. Kanata however was born and raised in a Japan long after the war ended, in more peaceful times where he never had to kill. And it's this fundamental difference in lived experiences and mindset that stops them from ever reaching an understanding about how to approach the war:
Even later, as the war goes on, after Okita almost killed potential allies (more on that later), and Kanata reveals to her he comes from the future and what his goals are (ensure his grandma doesn't die and he can come back), and they decide to have a more honest partnership with each other, it's still not enough.
Because when Okita kills a human soldier again, this time a soldier wounded by Berserker who charged Kanata because he was a Master and he blamed magi for how pear-shaped the whole situation has become, this time she does a 180 and instead of convincing Kanata to become ready to kill, she instead wants him to think of her as his tool to kill in his place and take the burden upon herself:
Kanata can only ask her if she's really fine being a sword to be used by someone else and nothing more, to which she replies that's all she needs.
Do note how completely obscured, borderline blank (save for a small, thin-lipped smile), Okita's face is as she says this. As if Kanata and us readers really can't tell how she actually feels about her own words.
This is not the first time the manga does this with Okita.
Coming back to the almost aborted alliance I mentioned earlier, what happened is that, a few chapter before this, the Rider of this war, Sakamoto Ryouma and Oryou, met with Okita to ask her and her Master for an alliance to stop the war from spiraling further and kill more innocents. It would be normal to be suspicious of their intentions, especially since Ryouma initially hides from her that he is a Servant.
But that's not the reasoning Okita uses to reject the alliance and subsequently attack them:
"There is only one path for me (war)." And here it is again: "She's not human."
And it happened even earlier too. When Servant Assassin (Okada Izou) fights Okita, he grows more and more disturbed as he doesn't feel fear, anger, or exaltation as he fights and cuts her, feeling nothing at all from her aside from the scent of blood. Okada's thoughts are interspersed with Kanata's own thoughts about visiting his dying comatose grandmother in the hospital as a kid. And when Kanata touched his grandmother's hand, just like when Okada faces Okita, all it felt like was that:
As you can see, a lot of emphasis, both textually and visually, that Okita does not feel human, and her way of thinking is so alien people can't comprehend her.
And it's not just her, Servants in general are portrayed this way throughout. You saw the pilot's words about Nobunaga at the start of this post, but it occurs later as well. When she was first summoned in the previous war a few years ago by the Imperial Army, her summoner was an arrogant dude who tried to get her to submit and she casually beheaded him. Following that is this page:
Nothing showing on this blood soaked face except for elongated eyes like those of a monster. And after that, everyone in the room prostrate themselves before her like she is a god they worship.
She picks her Master from the crowd, the half-Japanese girl Kaname Asama, and she treats her surprisingly decently from what we see throughout the manga, giving the shrinking violet of a girl respect like she is her attendant, unlike Kaname's boss Magatsu (more on him later) who threatens her and even hits her.
So you would think they have a cordial relationship? Well, maybe they did, but that was until the recent chapter, which has Magatsu's Berserker fight Lancer, and instead of helping their ally, Nobunaga wants to leave, which leads to this exchange:
The same face and eyes again. Kaname doesn't understand her Servant, nor can she tell what she's thinking, just as Nobunaga's face loses all expression, making it impossible for us to tell as well.
(This is not exactly new in regard to Nobu: Keikenchi, the original author of Koha-Ace and the mind behind Redline, already made a Koha-Ace oneshot previously focusing on her, and in it it was shown that, when she was alive, Nobunaga could not "hear" the voices of other people, other humans, and it's her being unable to understand other people that contributed to both her rise and fall)
Another Servant serving as a good example of this is Berserker, which obviously makes sense when it's the Class that from the very start of the Fate franchise in Fate/stay night was there to be impossible to communicate with. But interestingly, everything that surrounds Berserker, not just the Servant itself, reinforces this theme, as if the story employs irony in making the maddest of them all in a war full of mad people the more in-depth examination of the idea instead of being the most obvious.
But I need to scale back a bit to explain.
The Master of Berserker is Major Magatsu, the head of the Imperial Army's magecraft division and one of the main human antagonist. He is kind of interesting in how it's not just his Servant, but his own actions that act as a fulcrum to demonstrate the point. See, in these last stages where it is clear Japan is going to lose, Magatsu wants to keep the war going. His main goal is that he sees the war as not just for the glory of Japan, but as an opportunity to create a world where mages stand at the top, even planning to orchestrate a secret coup within the Japanese military. He is able to amass a great number of men under him, all fanatically loyal to him due to a mixture of his own charisma and appeal to nationalism as well as cigarettes laced with suggestive tobacco making the soldiers smoking it pliable. His followers are so loyal in fact, that when a team of them comes back defeated after facing a Servant trying to deal with Team Kanata, they beat the only survivor up and torture him for his failure and for failing Magatsu, without Magatsu's knowledge or consent (in fact, he is slightly disturbed by this and thinks to reduce the dosage of the tobacco).
But that doesn't deter him from his tactics. Even when he has to hasten his coup after being forced to when pro-war proponents in the war ministry are assassinated, leading to his enraged troops to blame the proponents of suing for peace within the ministry, he still keeps with the easily pliable and fanatical troops even though it is clear he can barely control them. "When the madman runs, any man not mad starts running" is written on a banner hanging on the wall of the magecraft division's headquarters, and Magatsu, who doesn't know who wrote it, finds it a good quote, not knowing how prophetic the words would become. Regardless, Magatsu has made the entire magecraft division and then some fold under his command by making them believe he will be the hero to save Japan. He makes many speeches about saving the nation and how the preservation of the Empire is vital to the preservation of the soul of the nation, and can easily drive crowds into nationalistic frenzy with talks of using Archer and Berserker to fight on mainland Manchuria, and clearly invoking the spirit of complete sacrifice to the nation like in banzai charges and kamikaze, even if not explicitly:
Sometimes, an ordinary and unrefined person will defeat their fear of death and become a noble person with the resolve to throw away their own lives. This phenomenon, which one could call a miracle, is occuring at this very moment, in various places within Japan. War allows all sorts of miracles to exist.
For these reasons, the Colonel, the so far unnamed high-ranked Nazi who is Magatsu's main ally, praises him for "having a knack for understanding human nature", which is why he gives him Berserker, as he believes that, if he experiences the war from the same position as Servants, Magatsu may be able to come to understand them...especially, as he notes, Magatsu completely failed to have Nobunaga pay him any attention:
Magatsu, for all his charisma and servile attitude, completely fails to have Nobunaga pay him any attention even once since her summoning years ago. When summoned, she ignored him in favor of going to Kasame. She doesn't follow his orders nor does she even acknowledge him as a faithful follower: he might as well be air in her eyes. Not only that, she only talks to his subordinate Kaname Asama, whom he disdains for having foreign blood due to being half-Japanese. And the Colonel rightly realizes that Nobunaga's lack of interest makes him seethe. Magatsu seethes so much in fact that he comes to the conclusion that he doesn't need to understand Servants, especially to win when they don't seem to care what he's they're fighting for, so he would rather settle for Berserker than the unruly Archer, believing he can control him thanks to the Heroic Spirit Restraining Device provided by the Nazis. Very predictably, it goes pretty poorly.
As soon as he's summoned and out of the tank he was put in, Berserker immediately begins to indiscriminately kill soldiers of the magecraft division for no reason, and when Magatsu attempts to use his Command Spells on him, he cuts off his arm and crushes it, making the Command Spells disappear. Berserker then engages in a rampage throughout the magecraft division base, gleefully killing every soldier in his way, yet does not kill his Master despite his failed attempt to restrain him:
Magatsu is unwittingly along for the ride as Berserker carries him in his arms as he goes about his "fun".
Naturally, Magatsu's men try to slow down and stop Berserker using "anti-Servant" weapons (lol) that obviously do jack shit. But they use too much firepower and seemingly ignore Magatsu's cries for help, which leads him to believe that they are trying to kill them both. Berserker agrees in his twisted logic, and enacts more violence as he believes his Master is in danger.
The reality is actually different: when Kaname Asama try to get to exercise more caution so they do not accidentally hit and hurt the Major, when he is clearly an hostage, one soldier slaps her and rebukes her, madly stating that there is no way the savior of Japan would ever get hurt by these weapons.
They keep throwing weapons and men at Berserker, which eventually confuses Magatsu, because weren't they trying to kill him? Why then are they wasting their lives against a Servant?
Which is when the point is made.
As this massacre rages on, Magatsu is telepathically contacted by the Colonel, who congratulates him on summoning Berserker and says that the Restraining Device is working wonderfully saying as the major's mana and life are still intact. Magatsu, enraged, accuses the Colonel of having done something to his men, maybe brainwashing them to kill themselves, which is a fair accusation considering it is the Nazis who did assassinate the war hawks and forced Magatsu to accelerate his coup plans.
Except the Colonel says he had nothing to do with it and the reason for the soldiers' actions is far simpler: they admire Magatsu, they truly, genuinely do. The Colonel explains that his accomplishments, from taking control of the war to making a Servant protect the capital from air raids, made him look like a true messiah in the eyes of his men, and Magatsu was too blind to see it. Of course he denies it and calls the Colonel a liar, until he sees one of his men approach and try to reach him, only to be pierced by Berserker's spear for his troubles, and as he lays dying, Magatsu hears his last words on his bloody lips: "Glory to the Major."
As the one-sided battle against the human waves of martyrs continue, the Colonel throws Magatsu's earlier words about the war "allowing miracles" back to his face, bringing the whole arc to its logical conclusion, and I will transcribe the speech in its entirety since it intersperses scenes of the battle and that's too much images to for this post:
How about you open your eyes to reality for once? The only sane person in that battlefield is you. War is cruel. It burdens its victims with a detestable fate. But look at them. They do it for their country, for you. Their madness calls forth even more madness. All these men rush forward, knowing well only death awaits them. War takes these ordinary men, and turn them into martyrs. War allows all sorts of miracles. I thank you. You've allowed me to witness something beautiful. Did seeing people die finally get to you? Feeling remorse? I suppose you didn't have what it takes to be a soldier. This is no time to be losing your mind, Major. It's not everyday you get to experience war from such a safe position. Revel in it a little more. You are at the center of a miracle. That which creates miracles, and gathers people's faith. What do you call that, Major? Do you know? A God. Congratulations, Messiah. In this exact moment and place, you are the one closest to a God.
Just as the voice of God can't reach mortals, your voice can't reach these men. For alas, there are none who can hear it. Raise your head, Major. The curtain has fallen at last. And you should now be able to understand her a little more.
Archer arrives, looking down at Berserker and Magatsu standing on the mountain of corpses of all the men of the magecraft division, and Magatsu tries one last time to get her to look at him by calling for her help, as all he ever wanted was to prove he was worthy to stand at her side...and she laughs in his face. She mocks him for thinking he could ever control a Servant and finds his tear-stained and snotty face hilarious.
And Magatsu, at this last straw after everything, breaks.
As he begins to laugh maniacally, his Servant joins in, and as Archer, Berserker, and him laugh, it's as if the corpses of his men, their mouth frozen in bloody leering rictus by rigor mortis, are laughing with them. Magatsu finally realizes it was wrong to think to use Servants in a war, because they could never be measured by human standards.
It's not that Servants can't be understood, not solely. This sequence of chapters shows it goes deeper than that: it's war that turns everyone mad, and thus makes understanding impossible among humans. And Servants are humanity writ large, the highest of the high and the lowest of the low, because you need to be larger than life to be remembered for eternity in the Throne of Heroes. Which means that, where war turns humans into mad monsters, it makes the Heroic Spirits standing above humans into the embodiments, the apotheosis, the personified concepts of madness.
They are mad gods.
The World War and the Holy Grail War are both founts of insanity, because that's what war does. The average soldier's brain briefly brushes with the eternal sublime, the mysterium tremendum et fascinans that turns humans into figures of worship recorded and enthroned for eternity beyond space and time. And this brief contact with the Absolute gives them the divine language that makes them unintelligible to other men. Their visages, like Moses' after descending the mountain, can no longer be looked upon. They are completely obscured to us who don't live and breathe for war, for violence is their domain now.
War makes Berserkers of us all.
Is it any wonder that the Classes of the Holy Grail War by design favor warriors and warmongers? This war is rife with adepts of violence: a warlord (Nobunaga), a warrior (Mori), a secret police assassin (Okita), a plain assassin (Okada), and a martial artist (Li Shuwen). All of which mad in their own way and choosing the path of violence over any other options.
And I don't think it's a coincidence that the sanest and most "normal" Servants we have seen in Redline not only belong to the Classes less obviously about violence or weaponry, Rider and Caster, but their identities are also not famous for violence: the Rider was a politician and diplomat, while the Caster is a scientific thought experiment about the laws of physics.
I don't know how this will conclude or shake out, but I have my suspicions. Our protagonist Kanata comes from the peaceful post-war Japan and has so far always been repulsed by violence, despite attempts by his Servant and his grandmother to get him to get used to it to be more effective in the war. In fact, he reaffirms that he wants to win the war without becoming a remorseless bloodthirsty killer.
I can see potential routes the story can take depending on whether he slowly succumbs to war's madness or he heroically resists its call. Especially if he is pitted against what seems to be one of the main antagonists, the Nazi Colonel, clearly war's most fervent prophet, whose face is always obscured.
We'll see. The latest chapter as of the time of writing is the fight between Lancer and Berserker. Even the pair that seems to get along the best, Team Lancer, has the Master threatened by her Servant for almost "interrupting" his fight by trying to heal his wounds. And her (current) last words are a perfect encapsulation of the manga and my whole thesis:
#fate type redline#fate/type redline#koha-ace#fate series#spoilers#okita souji#oda nobunaga#sakamoto ryouma#okada izou#mori nagayoshi#li shuwen#world war 2#world war ii#world war two#wwiii#wwii era#imperial japanese army#ramblings#long post#anti war
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Tradie's thinking, he should break it off, but she's so fucking wild and knows how to suck cock and ride him like no other woman has.
Next stop his brother's wife is getting on. It's their rendezvous point. Most passengers are already off, it's just the rural outside of town stops now.
She'll kneel before him, placing her hands on his muscular thighs. Slowly massaging them as she breaths in this working male's musk. His acrid stench of sweat mixed with dirt and grease repulses and excites her at the same time. She senses his granite chiseled abs tense while the monster head of his cock pushes against his heavy work pants seeking escape.
Slowly his brother's wife works her hands up his thighs to his crotch, where she begins to unzip him, her forearm applying the slightest amount of pressure against his swelling cock. God, I shouldn't be doing this, for fuck sake, it's my brother's wife! He thinks out loud. His cock is released and she strokes it slowly and firmly as she rises up and kisses him, whispering, "I need this. I need a real man's cock to satisfy me. Your brother looks good in a suit, his gym muscles make great eye candy, but I need a man to fuck me long and rough."
Slowly kneeling, she takes his uncut manhood in her mouth. She almost orgasms, the feeling of his hot throbbing cock in her mouth and the taste, the fucking taste, his salty alpha sweat and then, as her tongue probes his thick rough foreskin, the rancid pungent unwashed dick cheese burns her tongue. Her tongue is now frenzied, licking, craving more while her one hand is massaging his massive walnuts the other is lightly tracing his defined abs, tickling them with her fingernails.
His cock is now clean and the taste lingering on her tongue, only his crotch musk is left still filling her nostrils. She rises, smiling at her husband's brother. Looking him in the eyes, she slides down on his hard cock, burying him balls deep. He takes over, thrusting hard and deep. The three passengers at the far end of the train car have been trying not to watch, but they can't avoid watch this gorgeous blonde trophy wife and a nasty dirty tradie fuck with reckless abandon. The harder he bucks the harder she rides. 40 minutes ago when he got off work his muscles were exhausted. Now they are charged with testosterone and stronger than ever. His cock is as hard as the steel rail that the train is riding on. Holy Fuck she loves the feeling of him inside of her, she can feel the heat of his rough thick hard cock, his massive dorsal vein massaging her pussy and his massive mushroom head pushing against her cervix. She orgasms multiple times while he continues jackhammering her.
He feels her orgasms, he lives for this validation of his skill and manhood. Fuck, he remembers back in grade school when he got his first hard-on, he would practice fucking his brother, now he's fucking his brother's wife. The thought makes him fuck hard, holding back the intense urge to ejaculate. She wants to fuck with his mind and pull off right before he cums, but she can't, her pleasure and stimulation is too intense, her body won't let her.
She feels a powerful thrust and intense pain. He explodes inside of her, flooding her with his thick hot seed. Intense ecstasy washes over her as she feels herself filling with his hot manhood. His cock pulsating, pumping more and more of his thick hot alpha cum. She feels her cavern fill and feels his hot seed leaking out, the warmth as ropes of his hot cum spread on her beautiful soft smooth firm ass, in contrast to his rough work pants she felt moments before when he was thrusting deep into her sacred pussy.
"We can't let you go home to my brother messy" he says as he raises her up, turns her around and begins to lick her pussy clean.
She sits next to him, passionately kissing him until the next stop where she gets off, resuming her life as his brother's wife.
Our tradie has 12 minutes before his stop. With his dirty work clothes still unzipped and exposed cock still hard, he smiles at the passenger at the far end of the train who's been watching the whole time and rubbing himself. The passenger tries to look away, tradie nods and the passenger gets up and walks over. Tradie says "the show isn't free, you've been watching us, now you have to clean this cock."
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November 8 - Friday
Whew! Caught up at last!! (took me long enough)
Today was actually pretty good. I called Angel before school which made me really happy!! (I love him sm ill sob rn actually). My class wasn't toooo bad. The teacher talked sooo much ugh, but I drew the whole time so it was fine. I made my oc thinnn n pretty, love him. Also we had to go around the room and talk to people for like 30 minutes. 30. (did yk you have 30 minutes??)
It was so nerve wracking, especially because I was unprepared lol. I bet I looked like such a total weirdo with the lack of eye contact I was making, but at the time I was just trying not to break a nervous sweat LMAO.
Then, after my class I went to the library (on call w/Ange) and did an assignment. I went home afterwards because my phone was gonna die, and I needed my charger.
After a bit at home, I went to my next class, and I had a test in this one. It went good I think! We studied beforehand which I'm really grateful for.
We had a break in this class, so I went to walk around for a minute, and during this my mom texted me with:
"Eli
What did u eat today"
...
nothing. So, I said "I had some chicken nuggetss after my class hehe"
to which she responded "No fries no pop. How many nuggets"
GURL. So i was like "I did get some fries lol? and i got 10 why?"
and she just CONVENIENTLY NEVER RESPONDED. UGH.
(but wait theres more.)
After my class ended I went home and got ready for work. I was otp w/Angel (because seriously when am I not?) and he was playing minecraft. It was so peaceful and entertaining to watch and listen to him play- I loved every bit of it. Then, we talked about how we should play together (I ltrly will do anything to idc).
Work was actually ehh, not toooo bad. My dad and friend and her mom stopped by which was nice, and also my hairdresser LOL. They both tipped really well (obviously my dad did but yk).
I went home after what felt like one billion years, I was so so so happy. When I got home I just said a few things about my day like I usually do, and made sure to slip in the fact that I got a free meal at work. Which isn't wrong, I did, but I didn't get anything. I actually am just gonna let my friend get something tomorrow. but they don't have to know all that shhhhhhhh.
Then my mom stopped in front of me and was like what did you eat? and so i repeated myself bc no one listens to me <3
(I told her fried chicken tenders, fries, mac and cheese for context, a very 'me' meal tbh or at least it was)
Then, she was like "how many chicken tenders?" "no drink?" "did you finish it? all of it?" "so then you ate 2 full meals today?"
oh. my god. like. genuinely.
why. is. she. interrogating. me. pls. fucking. leave. me. alone. IM GENUINELY MORTIFIED AND HONESTLY IM SO AGGRIVATED. LET ME STARVE IN PEACE HOLY FUCK.
I tried to act like a normal person and be like ??? why are you interrogating me? BC WHY ARE YOU (as if I'm not literally starving myself)
She was just like "because I need to make sure you're getting nutrients." ok girl.
Then, I went to my room and she went to bed. I cleaned my room a bit and did a homework assignment, so I'm pretty proud of myself.
Also if you couldn't tell by now I fasted today. I was gonna either 48 hr fast or do 2 24 hr fasts back to back, but I think I'm just gonna do around 36 hrs. I wanna eat in front of my mom tomorrow so maybe she'll start leaving me alone (I seriously doubt it).
It just gets really frustrating when every meal I have she thinks isn't enough, even when I'm genuinely full. I can't eat like I used to like I physically cannot, she has to get that.
Anywho, I was thinking of making some cucumber boats tomorrow, I think it'll be fun.
Total Steps: 6.7k
Look at me meeting my step goal for once. I'm gonna start really making an effort at meeting it!
'Til tomorrow :)
(P.S. actually getting activity on these makes me so nervous but haiii)
#light as a 🪶#th!nsp0#thinneristhewinner#thinspø#thin$po#tw restriction#light as a feather#3ating d1sorder#th!n$piration#⭐️ ing motivation#putting the ⭐ in ⭐ving#⭐️ve#⭐️vation goals#⭐️rving#tw skipping meals#tw ana bløg#tw ed ana#tw ana rant#tw 3d vent#tw thinspi
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Hello! And Happy Wednesday! :) I have had some time to make some good progress on Sugar Baby Alex, so today we have a fun and long snippet. (so it's under a cut so I don't take up too much space) Hope you enjoy darlings <3
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Alex tried not to watch, to seem as unaffected as possible, because ultimately, he was meant to be the one seducing Henry, not the other way around. But watching the blond strip off his cozy oversized sweater had some sort of magnetic effect. The way fabric ruffled neat blond locks, how until this moment, Alex had not understood just how broad Henry was, a built frame with love handles and a plush stomach softened with age; all of it proved to be too much for Alex to resist. He’d been pretending to busy himself bringing towels closer to the pool’s edge when Henry slipped off shoes and shed his trousers. Even if Henry was in boxers that may as well have been swim trunks, his thighs were fully on display. And holy fuck, what a display it was. Alex literally felt himself manually swallow a groan as he locked eyes on maybe the thickest pair of thighs he’d ever seen. They looked strong, toned, and the fact that they weren’t wrapped around Alex’s head right now, was a criminal offense. Despite still walking, Alex’s gaze had not left Henry’s thighs, or body for that matter, for the last minute. That was how he ended up walking directly into a fence post. He hadn’t the slightest idea how he’d even gotten turned that way or walked that far. He only knew that his face hurt and that the dull *thunk* sound of his face meeting wood and subsequential groan had alerted Henry. “Alex? Oh my god, Alex are you alright? What happened?” After a short step backward, Alex raised one hand, the other pressing against his own nose, “I’m fine, I’m good, I promise. I mean, not nearly as good as you look,” he offered, giving his best bedroom eyes. ‘Play it cool Alex, play it cool’ chimed in the back of his head as he pulled his hand away from his face and saw the slightest tinge of red on his fingertips. With a minor sniffle, he wiped the top of his hand under his nose, streaking crimson over tanned skin. “It’s all good,” he assured the other man, still giving his best come-hither look. “Oh my god, you’re bleeding, Christ Alex, you are not fine,” Henry fussed, quickly making his way over to the brunette. Both of his hands scooped Alex closer, one hand on the other man’s lower back as he walked the two of them toward the house. “Come on, come inside, we’ve got to get some ice on that and figure out if it’s broken.” “Hen, I’m good, really,” Alex groaned, waving his blood smeared hand in the direction of the blond. “Stop that, you’re literally bleeding Alex, inside now.” “Oh baby, I like that authoritative tone, you’re sexy when you get all demanding. Can we play doctor and patient?” the brunette giggled, letting himself be pushed inside and into Henry’s kitchen. “You’re a menace, Alexander. You’re also American, and I’m certain your insurance doesn’t cover whatever sexual fantasy you’re cooking up,” the blond tutted, pushing Alex to sit in a kitchen chair as he rushed around to get a damp cloth and an ice pack.
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🏷️(no pressure tags darlings)
@taste-thewaste @onthewaytosomewhere @henrysfox
@mikibwrites @eusuntgratie
@softboynick @catdadacd @sheepywritesfics
@henryspearl
@basil-bird @caressthosecheekbones
@henfox @anti-homophobia-cheese @redlipstickandglitter
@thesleepyskipper @tailsbeth-writes @thighzp
+ literally anyone else I'm tired and forgot. (Im queueing this at 2:30am) or anyone who sees this and wants to tag me, I love reading yall's stuff. <3
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House of The Dragon 2x8 Spoilers and Review.
This is gonna be a rant but I'm still putting a spoiler warning cause some people were waiting for the entire season to drop before they watched. I was spoiled during the week and I'm mad as hell about it. Yes we all know it's fuck book canon atp but at least make sure the story flows and make actual sense.
The finale was mid. I felt like there were a lot of things missing and it was kinda confirmed. We're gonna have to wait 2 long years and knowing season 3 is about to just be the assassinations of characters because season 2 didn't really do anything, nothing moved story wise except the death of Jaehaerys, the sowing of the dragons seeds and the death of one of the realest women in Westeros. It was just glorified fanfiction and most definitely not the good kind.
I'm begging Ryan and Sara to please read or at least have someone else read the source material before they get back in that writers room.
Lucerys, Visenya and Jaehaerys deaths were supposed to haunt the narrative for the entirety of the season, how they could fumble it so bad that it just feels like a drop of water on your hands while washing it is beyond me. Blood and Cheese felt insignificant as fuck considering it was also a major event that led to the destruction and death of one of the most prominent houses in Westeros, majority of the Targaryen's lineage and the death of most of the dragons. I should've known when they started promoting the 2nd season as Alicent vs Rhaenyra instead of Rhaenyra vs Aegon II, y'know the usurper, that it was gonna be some bullshit. The other major events in the second season, Rhaenys' death also felt brushed aside. This is why the show needs to be at least 12-14 episodes. Abolish the 8-10 episodes shit.
I'm gonna get hate for this but could they please let this Rhaenicent relationship go! For the love of everything that is holy, let it go. Season 1 focused on them, fine. Season 2 you gave them a reunion, crazy but okay. There was literally no reason for a second reunion. Sure the scenes were beautiful, shout-out to the actors but let it go. The plot already felt cheapened when they chalked up the dance to one big misunderstanding. Which is crazy considering, Otto and the small council literally had this entire plan set in motion since Rhaenyra was named heir and even a little before. I need Ryan to understand that sometimes friendships just end. Sometimes your friends cross the lines one too many times and you just need to let them go. Alicent overstepped and crossed the lines with Rhaenyra it was downright disrespectful for Rhaenyra to even be in her presence at all tbh. This is the same woman who made her life a living hell, raised her children to be vile, hateful, spiteful little shits towards their own sister and her children, embarrassed her and tormented her in court, started and participated in the rumors and smear campaign about Rhaenyra's character and children, essentially ran her out of her own home, lied about the death of her father and the news didn't come from her or the council immediately but after and that's only because they were holding her former mil hostage and she got away. Alicent knew Viserys was addled and delirious and out of his mind when he was rambling about the conqueror's dream (she didn't know about the prophecy but still), so nothing he said was supposed to be taken seriously and just because he said “Aegon” she decided to be spiteful/hateful and usurp the throne knowing it would've hurt Rhaenyra. I don't know why people gloss over this fact either. Aegon said it himself, his father had years to name him heir and he remained steadfast to Rhaenyra's claim. Aemond said it again this season, the small council and his mother plotted to usurp the throne. What more was there to talk about? The only talking that should've been happening is Rhaenyra signing her and the council's execution warrants for treason. This all started because Rhaenyra omitted the truth about who took her virginity btw. She didn't lie, she never slept with Daemon in that brothel. Not to mention that Alicent son also killed her child!! Let it go!
I'm gonna reiterate this point but we didn't need to spend all that time with Daemon in Harrenhal and his hallucinations. That should've taken 3 episodes top and then they could've had him work on his relationships with his family instead. Especially his daughters. The only thing I liked coming out of the Daemon hallucinations is the prophecy. DAENERYS STORMBORN TARGARYEN IS THE “PRINCE” WHO WAS FUCKIN PROMISED!! NOT THAT BUM JON SNOW. Fuckin finally. We could lay the discourse to rest. GRRM could've posted it on a billboard for the entire world to see and it still would've had the select few that will insist on Jon being the one who the prophecy was talking about. The events in the show and the book supported this btw so I don't even know what the argument was about but let's lay it to rest now. Although show wise it doesn't fuckin matter either way because D&D fucked the last seasons but book lore wise this is what GRRM intended or intends. Still waiting on the next book! The term “prince” was gender neutral. And everybody celebrates. Daemon swearing allegiance to his Queen, as he fuckin should. Raising the army in her name as he should. He's got voices in his head now apparently. Also he has a new friend in Alys, good for him.
Aemond did what he was supposed to do this season. He's still an unhinged psychopath, absolutely no one is surprised. No complaints on my end. I need him to keep his grubby hands to himself though. Helaena gave him his death notice and rubbed in the fact that nobody gave a damn about him in the end, she did that for me.
Criston even though I hate to admit it, same thing. He's still a woman hating piece of shit though and I want him dead immediately. We didn't need all those alicole sex scenes though. We got it, they were fuckin, kudos.
Larys and the small council did what was also expected.
Aegon is still fried. Now he's apparently heading to Essos. He wants to usurp the moniker “Realm's delight” too and to that I say absolutely tf not. That is reserved for pretty women only. Aegon has officially been castrated!! That was for all the women in the realm. It's what he deserved. I don't believe for one second that Sunfyre is dead. I think that'll be a swerve.
I wished we focused on Helaena more though. Her grief was explored a little more than Rhaenyra's but it was also brushed aside. Why? That would've been important to her characterization. Also why did they have Helaena astral project into Daemon's dream? She was so cool as well, like that man didn't have a hand in the death of her son.... You can't make this shit up. The scene was essentially “you killed my kid cool but since you're so good at killing could you get my brother next?” I'm convinced they are doing this shit on purpose. Why do they keep making the female characters in the show this peace seeking, docile beings when they were just as and even more chaotic than their male counterparts (with reason might I add). The men just do the most unhinged shit for glory and in the name of war sake and the women gotta be the peacekeepers even though they're the most wronged.
Alicent's character didn't deserve half the screentime she got because if you cut her scenes in half the majority of them contributed nothing to the moving along of the plot. Absolutely nothing. We already had limited time as is.
Baela and Rhaena I am so sorry you have incompetent people telling your side of the story. Sure they got more lines this season and that's a stretch but they're lacking characterization as well. Ryan and Sara scrapped the Nettles plot, okay (that was fuckin stupid). Nettles had a major role to play. Gave her story to Rhaena in the last two episodes and we still didn't even see her claim Sheepstealer. It's up in the air. Also one of the princesses of the Realm managed to escape and you mean to tell me nobody is looking for her? She just fucked off and that's it. Yeah okay. Also I hated how they wrote her relationship with Jeyne. She was so kind to her in the books and Rhaena actually had a story in the books when she went to stay with her. Sure she would've been living her princess core era life but it's what she deserves. It would've helped flesh out her character as well, led to her hatching Morning and her life after the dance.
Baela lost the majority of her characterization as well even though she's inherently more fleshed out than Rhaena. Baela was chaotic as hell in the books. They swapped her personality in a sort of way with Jace, although he does have a temper (and rightfully so. They did kill his little brother and sister and he seems like the only one who cares) but Baela is supposed to be more unhinged than him. We only caught a few glimpses of her book personality and that's it. Again why are they writing the female characters as these docile, peace seeking beings? They also completely brushed aside their grief concerning their brother/betrothed, sister, mother and grandmother. I'm tired. We kinda got something for Baela in her grief but it was the bare minimum and it was barely mentioned again. Rhaenys was a parent to those girls (more than Daemon at least) and she got a fuck all remembrance. We totally should've gotten even better Jace and Baela's relationship development. We got her being more of his support system though they were each other's. Baela's feelings weren't explored more besides her hating her dad. Unless they're planning to explore it more in season 3 but well y'know 💔. Her telling Jace to stop pouting though and him insisting he's not even though he totally was🤣🤣😭😭. She gathered him and rightfully so. Also their unspoken conversation during the dinner scene with the dragonseeds. Peak wife and husband behavior. I hope we don't have to mourn for what could've been more than we will already be doing.
Rhaenyra character this season was all over the place. They only stick to what her character was from season 1 in episode one and then after that it was like she did a 180. She was destroyed by the grief of her son, daughter and father. They completely forgot that and had her doing the stupidest stuff. She had one of her biggest supporters die as well and it was just cast aside. Development wise we got to see her more open. I'll give them that. They also brushed aside her grief. It felt like Lucerys didn't matter to her in some instances. I have a feeling they're gonna go down the “mad Targaryen” role for her as well. If a woman has to be in power then she has to go crazy. That's what that cult Rhaenyra vibes is giving. I'm not tripping, you guys see it too right? I touched on the second reunion between her and Alicent but her whacking her this last episode was satisfying. I don't trust Alicent's plan and Rhaenyra knows and hopefully she sticks to it. She knows that she has to kill Aegon now. A son for a son. This is who I wanted to see this season. It's like she got back her personality traits in the last episode. She still needs to work on her standing as queen. She had that bum Ulf disrespecting her at the table and she needed to have his tongue expeditiously. Mysaria and her are doomed yuri confirmed. Mysaria has her ear but is only telling her what she wants to hear and that is going to be her downfall. I still can't figure out her angle though but we'll see in season 3. She inadvertently hurt Jace again when she chose Addam to go to Harrenhal. It's like one step forward and then 3 steps back with them. I'm hurt knowing the possible outcome of this situation. Daemon and her reunion were good. I like how she didn't fall back into his arms. Stand on business and continue to stand on business Rhaenyra.
Corlys grief was brushed aside. He didn't really do anything this season besides deny his sons, lie to his wife in his last moments and try to make his legitimate granddaughter heir after laughing off the idea of making his other legitimate granddaughter heir. His ship is finally fixed though. “The Queen Who Never Was ” is the new name of it. I had tears in my eyes, I could admit it. I'm not ashamed. Everything that he's doing now he's doing it for Rhaenys. 😭😭😭😭😭😭 Why did he wait so freaking long to honor her properly though 💔. There is no denying he loved his wife, he just could've loved her better. I'm glad Alyn dragged his ass for being a deadbeat though. Gave his ass a reality check he so richly deserved. He hurt those boys and he deserved to know. Imagine your father could've made your life easier but he decided to be a coward while favoring his other children, a tongue lashing would've been the least he got, I would've fought him. They're on to meet the triarchy though.
Jacaerys character was developed stellar this season. He didn't have plenty of screentime and he was mugging down for most of it but the rage, the grief, the despair was all palpable. He lost a part of his soul in Lucerys and it was there for everybody to see. He didn't get anything to do until the later half but when he got to go he did. I said it before and I'll say it again I love his and Baela's relationship. Him resting his hand in her lap after her scolding and her gently massaging it. Yeah those are real lovers. His beef with Ulf is so personal to me. Like yes threaten that uncouth vermin some more. Really reminded me of his fathers there. It's crazy though how Addam and Jace parallel each other though. Two of the best boys in Westeros that deserve the absolute world. Fate was unkind to them both as well.💔
Shout-out Simon Strong. One of my favorite characters this season along with lil Oscar. I love how he didn't let that traitorous snake Alfred slide. He let his queen know immediately. I love a loyal diva.
Tyland and the triarchy were funny though. Who would've thought I could've shown a Lannister besides Cersei love?!
I'm wrapping up this rant cause it's already so long-winded. The show is only slated for 4 seasons though btw. LMFAO.
Until next time folks. Take care of yourselves in the meantime.
Until season 3 folks.
#hotd#house of the dragon#house of the dragon season 2#hotd season 2#hotd spoilers#rhaenyra targaryen#daemon targaryen#jacaerys velaryon#jacaerys targaryen#baela targaryen#rhaena targaryen#daenerys targaryen#corlys velaryon#rhaenys targaryen#addam velaryon#alyn velaryon#alicent hightower#criston cole#aemond targaryen#aegon ii targaryen#helaena targaryen#larys strong#otto hightower#ulf the white#hugh the hammer#alys rivers#simon strong
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