#hol’ up how did these tears get in my coffee

[scarletspider2the2ndpower]

“The Grim Hunt: Chapter 2,” Amazing Spider-Man (Vol. 1/1963), #635.

Writer: Joe Kelly; Penciler: Michael Lark; Inkers: Stefano Gaudiano and Matt Southworth; Colorist: Matt Hollingsworth; Letterer: Joe Caramagna

[azalea-writes]

Hoi wondering about child!MC that’s very wise and self sufficient but very honest and talks causally about their domestic abuse at home?

A/N: Hello!! The age of MC is up to your interpretation! I went out of track oops

Warning: Domestic abuse

Lucifer, Mammon, Asmodeus, and Beelzebub with a child!MC who dealt with domestic abuse

ooc lucifer

Alt: Enjoy!

***

Lucifer

Wasn't excited to have a child in the HoL since he has to deal with 6 other man-children.

He was quite distant, so it took him a while to learn how well-mannered MC is or what they had to deal with at home.

Lucifer went to the kitchen to get some coffee, only to see MC washing the dishes while standing on a not-so stable stool.

When he saw that MC was about to fall off the stool, he picked them up and put them on the floor.

"Thank you, sir!"

Lucifer was confused on how a child has more manners than his brothers.

"Apparently their parents would yell at them for not doing anything right. They even said that their parents would get physically violent," Asmo had said with tears in his eyes. It confused Lucifer. Why would anyone have such high expectations for a child?

Lucifer made it his mission (though, he would never tell anyone that) to help MC enjoy their childhood and not to worry for any awful consequences. It was hard, but it might've been his older brother instincts (and pride *ahem*) that didn't let him back down.

His brothers would tease him for having a soft spot for the human child. Lucifer would of course deny it, not wanting to show some sort of weakness. But as he is lying down on his bed, MC curled up next to him after Lucifer calmed them down from their mental breakdown, he was thinking back to his brothers' words.

Of course Lucifer knew about his soft spot for the child, but he didn't want to appear weak to the public. Yet, as he feels MC grabbing his arm their slumber, he doesn't regret a thing.

Mammon

When he got a call from Lucifer, he was expecting to see an adult, not a kid.

"Hello, sir!"

What he was also expecting that the child had no manners at all, but they proven him wrong yet again.

"A child has more manners than Mammon," he heard Asmo snicker.

But, like the usual, he was complaining. about having to babysit a child. What if the child is secretly the devil in disguise?? (Diavolo secret child wow /j)

What's even worse is that MC resides in his room due to Lucifer's orders!

As Mammon was grumbling about how dumb Lucifer is, MC cringed at how messy his room was. Out of instincts, MC decided to clean the room. They gathered Mammon's clothing into one big pile, while Mammon went from talking about Lucifer to his new business idea.

Mammon came back to reality when he heard a thud come from behind. Lo and behold, MC had tripped while carrying a pile of clothes that obscured their view.

"Ya okay kid?!" Mammon hurriedly came by their side. MC just apologized and continued what they were doing. Now Mammon was confused, what the hell are they doing?

"Oi! Why are ya cleaning my room?" He asked, finally noticing the big pile of laundry that was accumulating.

"I'm cleaning your room!" MC happily replied. Were they trying to earn brownie points? No. Did they want a reward? No. Did they think if they did a good deed for him, he would need to pay them back? No.

"My parents would get mad at me for doing something wrong. Sometimes they get really mad and hit me. So I'm protecting you!" MC's answer shocked Mammon, their words repeating in his head while he's trying to comprehend the situation.

As MC struggled to get something on the shelf, he came up behind them and got it for them.

"From now on, I'll be you're big brother protecting ya!" Mammon gave them a toothy grin.

Asmodeus

When he first saw MC, he squealing and talking about how adorable they are.

He's already thinking of many outfits for them, better than what they have on right now.

MC is going to learn many makeup tips at a young age, which Asmo found out that they learn quite quickly.

He is going to have a kid-friendly (and human-friendly) skin care routine for MC. Gotta prevent wrinkles at a young age! (a really young age...)

MC also quickly learned the routine and they're able to do it themself!

He's the brother who's going to tell MC gossip, whether they understand it or not. (what does identity theft mean..?)

"And they were roommates!" Asmo told the story dramatically to keep MC intrigued, even though they didn't understand anything he said.

"Can you hand me my face serum?" Asmo asked, which MC complied. Though with their hands wet from cleansing their face, they were bound to drop it. It shattered on the floor while both of them froze.

Asmo was about to speak until MC started spewing out apologies and the tears were quickly forming.

"Hey, hey! It was just a small accident, I can buy another one!" Asmo tried to comfort them but to no avail.

"I-I'm sorry! Please don't p-punish me!" MC choked out while crying. Asmo froze again, not believing what he was hearing.

"Why would I do that? I wouldn't do something like that, you know me...!" Asmo kept his voice low so MC wouldn't be scared (more than they already are).

With more comforting words, along with his soft voice, MC was able to calm down. Asmo let out a sigh of relief.

"My parents would always get mad at me for doing anything wrong..." It was a short answer, but it was enough to know what had happen to MC before coming to the Devildom.

"Let me make you a promise then!" Asmo exclaimed, "No one hurt you here in the Devildom, and if they do, they'll face the wrath of all seven of us!"

Beelzebub

THIS BIG GUY LOVES HIS FAMILY!

Immediately wanted to adopt MC.

Though Satan had to inform him that MC still has a family...

Will be a little disheartened if MC is scared of him.

He did not trust Mammon to take care of MC, so he makes it his job to make sure MC is alive and healthy.

Mammon does not know how to take care of a child, especially when the child is a human...

Beel tells stories about Belphie and Lilith to MC, it just makes him happy to talk about his siblings.

"So you three would secretly go to the human world?" MC asked with their head in a slight tilt to the side. Beel smiled softly and nodded.

"Wow! If I sneaked out, I would've gotten in a looooot of trouble," MC sighed out.

"You're only a kid, so your parents would be really worried," Beel explained. Then he realized that MC never talks about their parents. Now Beel felt bad. He always talked about his family without knowing how MC feels.

"What about your family? I never let you talk about them," Beel said.

MC thought a bit about their answer, "Well, my parents are always in a bad mood. I once broke a plate by accident and mommy started to hit me."

Beel went wide-eyed. He was hoping he heard wrong, but MC kept talking and that hope went away. He put a hand on MC's shoulder, which made them go quiet.

"MC, you don't have to worry about punishment anymore. I'll make sure nobody hurts you anymore." Beel reassured MC. Even though they were confused on what Beel was talking about, the sincerity in his voice made them nod to his words.

***

REASON FOR MY ABSENCE: School is hard and I want to focus on my grades. So I haven't written anything in order to not burn out because I have bad self discipline. I'll try to get through all the requests during Christmas break, but I can't promise anything!

Alt: Thanks for requesting! Love you!

I don't know how to write Beel! :D

[phrynewrites]

Fluff 9 sounds perfect for the teacher au volleyball scene 👀

VOLLEYBALL SCENE TIME!!!

9. Nothing, you just look really nice, is all.

__

Bosco did not want to play volleyball. In their mind, pep rally meant they could drop their class off at the gym and fuck off to their room to grade a stack of vocabulary quizzes and journal entries, only slightly interrupted by the screaming and off-key rendition of The Final Countdown playing two halls down.

Kornbread had guilted them into participating in the volleyball game, laying out their reasons methodically: promising that she’d be the designated driver when they went out for drinks afterward; the kids on the student team were almost entirely the most annoying children they taught; and after this year, victory was incredibly necessary for staff morale. So Bosco begrudgingly agreed.

But when they see Jasmine wander onto the court, a little unsure of where she was going but still walking with that typical spring in her step, with her matching jacket and leggings, hair tied back in two braided pigtails—well, their participation becomes less begrudging. And they’re going to blame it on the fact that at least someone was having fun, if they were ever asked.

Jasmine’s cocked eye and huff pulls them out of the thought. “Is there a problem?”

“No.” They ring their hands out, trying to feel composed. “Why would there be?”

“You’ve got this weird look about you.”Jasmine shrugs. “I don’t know, it’s like I’m waiting for you to be mean to me or something.”

She walks on by and joins the group in the center, all of them trying to strategize before the game.

And Bosco thinks, as they watch her leave, that there may in fact be a problem.

___

While Bosco could—and did—tear into Jasmine’s classroom management, her boring textbook-based lessons, her stupid cute little sweaters with various summer-time fruits on them, the sheer amount of sugar she takes in her coffee, how scrunched up and red she gets when she’s sad, they couldn’t find anything but admiration now.

The ball struck the floor on the opposing side, booing from the bleaches surrounding them, nearly engulfing the cheers from the other teachers that Jasmine earned. It was the fourth spike she’d driven across the net, putting them two points ahead of the sulking eighth graders.

Jasmine rests her hands against her knees, catching her breath before accepting the high-five and how do you do that from Kornbread.

“I don’t know. I think I’m just, like, channeling my rage,” Jasmine replied through a laugh, straightening out and stretching her arm behind her head. “Also volleyball camp, all through high school.”

She sheds her jacket, throwing it off to the side, letting Camden spring up from her spot next to Angie and pull it off the court. Jasmine pulls at her other arm, her defined back muscles now visible under the tank top.

“Seriously, what’s your deal?” Jasmine says under her breath, folding her arms as they shift over.

“Nothing,” Bosco spits back, knowing they’re growing defensive, having been caught staring again, kind of wanting to stare now that Jasmine’s crossed her arms. It’s like once Jasmine shed those rainbow striped sweaters and pleated skirts, Bosco shed their subtlety and confidence along with it. “You just look nice is all.”

Bosco stands there, busying themself with adjusting their ponytail as Jasmine stares at them. And Bosco stares back, noticing the sweat pooling in her brow and the hairs coming loose from her pigtails. And they swore they could see a smile—a slight one, but still—slip through before Daya pushes them to their new position before returning to her own.

Jasmine turns again, like she’s about to say something. But the ball’s coming toward her, a few feet in front of her, and all of a sudden she’s on her knees, quick as lightning and just as striking. She bends back, hitting the ball up and calling for Kerri to hit it over.

The ball sails over the net and Jasmine props herself up, breathless.

Bosco is as well.

___

Bosco holds the ball gingerly, thinking no one should have given it to them. They’re sure Korn’s look as they handed it off said as much, but it was the last rotation and Bosco had to do it.

They toss the ball once, trying to follow it, see when it wold be best to hit it.

They toss it again, then take a step back, figuring they should get some power from their footing.

They toss it once more—

Jasmine, now in front of them, squats down. She shifts her hips, ready for the ball to then volley back. Her legs spread slightly, bent forward, muscles tense. Those leggings really should be illegal, Bosco thinks, finding there’s nothing they can do to pull their gaze away from—

“Just serve it!” Daya yells from across the court.

Shit.

Bosco throws it up quick, gaze still clouded, but nonetheless smacks it. Hard.

Their hand stings and the ball rolls off to the side.

And Jasmine topples over like a sack of bricks, striking the floor. Hard.

Fucking shit.

Bosco rushes over, kneeling over Jasmine. They shed their own sweatshirt, balling it up and stuffing it under her head. And through the jeers of teachers, Daya going on about them “costing us the game,” and Kerri promising that Bosco’s “getting pick up and drop off duty now,” and Korn thinking aloud about all the paperwork she’s going to have to do because of this, Bosco’s muttering apologies to Jasmine. Apologies which may or may not be getting through to her, her eyelids opening and closing languidly.

Jasmine studies Bosco, her eyes locking on theirs, a shared gaze.

Bosco grows hot, and if anyone asks, they’re going to say it’s from embarrassment. And that they’d brushed her sweat-struck hair back to check for lumps forming after the fall.

“Are you-”

But Jasmine doesn’t finish. Instead, Camden’s taking over, instructions urgent, explanation sparse, and Jasmine’s being hauled off the court to be screened for a concussion.

Bosco watches the door close and shakes their head. The fog clears, but all that’s left is Bosco replaying the match over and over, trying to find an answer to Jasmine’s unspoken question.

[levis-little-nuggie]

How the brothers would react to catching f!MC riding a suction-cupped dildo on the communal HOL washing machine

I didn't think through how much I hate this idea, but I fuckin ran with it so here we are and I'm not apologizing. However the title is still a work in progress. I am accepting ideas.

This first one is Lucifer's reaction.

Warnings: little bit of blood (in a sexy way), he calls MC some vulgar names >:( but he apologizes so I guess it's okay, fem!MC because I was feeling self-indulgent.

Rating: explicit 😌

Word count (so far): 2,628

Carrying the weight of the hamper on her hip, MC closed the laundry room for behind her and padded over to the oversized washing machine. It was laundry day for her and living in a mansion with seven demon brothers didn't make this any easier. Their keen sense of smell had her on edge about keeping certain articles of clothing cleaner, washing them more frequently than when she lived in the human world.

She threw in her load of pajamas, towels, and underwear, including the pair she had been currently wearing, leaving her in an oversized shirt she'd "borrowed" from Beel. MC mixed in the detergent and fabric softener, and started the cycle. As the hot water started pouring into the bin, MC double-checked that the door was closed before pulling out the suction-cup dildo she'd hidden in the laundry bin and stuck it to the top of the washer. MC nudged the step stool closer to the machine, applied a generous amount of lube to the toy, clambered on top of the washer, and positioned herself over the dildo.

Thanks to previous instances in the laundry room, MC was fully aware of both the machine's durability to hold her weight comfortably, and its vigorous shaking when loads were unbalanced. Asmo had winked at her when she came running to him for help for taming the large appliance. "You could say, with a bit of creativity, it'd be the next best thing to sitting on my face, hon."

He'd been right. Unfortunately, this also meant that Asmo knew what laundry day meant to MC and she already felt mortified sharing this dirty secret with Asmo so MC tried her best to schedule her trip to the laundry room for whenever he wasn't home. Luckily enough, it seemed the rest of the brothers were completely unaware of her sinful indulgence and this activity quickly became addicting.

Having already been wet from the excitement, MC's fingers slid into her, pumping and scissoring to stretch herself open. She pressed the tip of the toy against her opening, biting her lip to stifle the noises she wanted to make as her fingers moved to circle over her clit, squeezing her eyes shut as her hips lowered onto the toy. Taking a few moments to breathe from the size of the dildo filling her up, MC maneuvered her legs to shift from her kneeling position sitting on the machine, toy fully sheathed inside, her ass against the lid, and legs hanging over the top.

Her hands trembled from both the excitement and the warmth that stirred in her lower abdomen as she reached for her phone; the machine would be still for awhile as the clothes soaked, but MC loved to fantasize she was cock-warming any one of the brothers until they both gave in and he fucked her mercilessly.

Lazily circling her hips to feel the toy move around inside her, MC mindlessly nibbled on her thumb while flicking thru Devilgram. Scrolling down the feed, she stopped to watch a video Mammon had posted, the audio flowing through the DDD's speakers a teaser for an upcoming song he was releasing. Turning up the volume on her device, MC let the video repeat as she felt herself getting hyped for the track to release. After double-tapping to like the post and leaving an energetic comment, MC opened the music app on her DDD and shuffled the playlist she made of the brothers' songs to stream while she opened a game on her phone to complete the daily task while waiting for the washer cycle to start.

The above set-up will be the same for all the brothers. Below this point will be Lucifer's reaction.

Another prank from the Lucifer You S*ck team left the eldest with some ruffled feathers and an ever-growing coffee stain on his RAD uniform. A vein pulsed on his forehead as he sauntered to the laundry room.

What he wasn't expecting, however, was to hear MC singing along to Satan's song behind the laundry room door. The eldest brother hesitated, his grip tightening on the doorknob as he debated waiting for her laundry to finish but found his brows furrowing as she stopped singing, the machine started its spin cycle, and the faintest of moans floated through the door.

"What in Diavolo's name-" Lucifer opened the door to investigate but halted as he took in the scene before him. MC's eyes had widened, staring directly at Lucifer in a way that perfectly explained the human idiom "like a deer stuck in the headlights." Her mouth was agape but quickly snapped shut as she tried to stifle her panting, legs crossing themselves in an attempt to look innocent, but her white-knuckle grip on the edge of the washer had him feeling alarmed.

"MC, what's going on? Are you feeling unwell?" The machine had started rocking as it began its spin cycle, but Lucifer couldn't figure out why MC was sitting on top of the washer. Was she feeling ill? Her forehead had a sheen of sweat, did she have a fever? Lucifer dropped his clean uniform and crossed the room so he was directly infront of MC, reaching out to feel her heated face, completely disregarding her feeble attempts to assure him she was fine.

'Lucifer! I'm fine, just doing some laundry' was what she wanted to say. However, with the machine rocking, the dildo was rubbing right up against her g-spot and she was fighting the urge to grind her hips. She managed to sound out the first half of his name, but the way his gorgeous, ruby eyes looked into hers with concern, his facial features that were carved by God himself, and a single thrust against that spot had her shivering, finishing the rest of his name in a sultry moan.

The Avatar of Pride blinked as the cogs in his brain stuttered trying to piece together what was happening, his hand froze in mid-air as he had been reaching out to feel the temperature of her skin. The machine continued to rock and MC couldn't find the strength to pretend she wasn't riding a dildo on the communal washing machine and felt her control starting to slip. MC couldn't read the expression on his face and averted her gaze, trying to deny that him watching her like this was turning her on even more.

Seeing his hand stretched out, MC leaned forward the small distance to press her cheek against his palm, biting her lip as she stole a glance at the demon. His eyes remained transfixed, dazed, but he didn't pull his hand away and MC was feeling a little more daring than usual. Tilting her head, she pressed his thumb against her lip, her eyes flickering again to his own for barely half a second, and closed her lips around the tip of his thumb, running her tongue along the seam of the leather. His lack of response coaxed MC on to keep going. Her tongue drew the digit in further, lips gliding over the leather, the material fueling new fantasies she'd previously overlooked.

As the dildo continued its steady rocking, MC felt her control melting away and frustration slowly started to build. Why hadn't he moved? Surely it'd be better if the eldest had scoffed in disgust and turned away than to have him just staring at her like this. She swirled her tongue around his thumb, lips hollowing as she sucked, trying to illicit some sort of response from the demon.

However, he remanded unmoving. MC felt an array of emotions ranging from frustration, shame, embarrassment, anger, all mixed with the sexual desire raging thru her, MC felt tears prick her eyes. She released the thumb from between her lips with an audible pop and faced Lucifer with a snarl; which he found endearing and as threatening as the chihuahua.

"I don't do live performances. Either touch me or leave." MC made a show or grabbing her breast from under her shirt, letting the pleasure from the toy fill her senses and began grounding her hips against the toy as the spin cycle picked up speed. Getting ready to bark at him again, MC yelped as the shirt was torn open and a pair of hands gripped her hips keeping her still but the dildo continued moving with the machine.

"I didn't realize our little human was such a naughty slut. Really. Sticking a toy on our washing machine? Are you that desperate to be fucked?" Nails bit into her flesh as his voice called out her sins, all traces of her bravado gone, replaced with an overwhelming sense of embarrassment and shame. MC tried hiding her face but he still saw the tears that threatened to spill over before crawl down her face and cooed.

"There's nothing to feel ashamed over, my dove. I apologize if I was too vulgar." Lucifer lifted her hips and she squirmed, not ready for him to see the full extent of the situation; the idea of the dildo coated in her juices waving about on top of the poor washing machine only intensified her embarrassment. However, before she could speak out, Lucifer dropped her hips causing her to slam herself back down on the toy. Stars erupted across her vision as the demon repeated the action, drinking in her reactions and felt his erection strain against his pants.

"This carnal desire is human nature. If anything, it's our own fault for not considering such a basic need." His fingers trailed along her neck, tapping against her pulse as if in thought. The hum of the washer broke through the moment and Lucifer clicked his tongue behind his teeth. He reached behind her to turn off the machine and lifted MC off the machine, and the dildo.

MC didn't get a chance to wince from the manhandling as her lips were immediately covered with his own and she felt him pulling her close to him, his hands urging her to wrap her legs around him. She couldn't match the fire he was pouring into her fast enough and he growled, simultaneously smacking her ass and grinding his erection against her folds. This new side of the prideful demon caught her off guard, but the smack brought her back with a fervor.

Her hands fumbled with the buttons on his collar and he kneaded where he spanked her, causing MC to mewl into the kiss. One of his hands moved up to hold the back of her neck as he walked to pin her against a wall. Her legs squeezed his hips tighter and he reached up to break open the collar of his shirt, shedding the clothing haphazardly somewhere else in the room. Meanwhile, MC moved to undo his pants, reaching into his trousers to palm his erection. Lucifer hissed and grabbed her wrists, pinning them to her stomach with one hand.

Releasing her lips, Lucifer latched onto her throat, biting down on the skin above her pulse and positioned himself at her entrance, hesitating for only a moment to allow her the chance to back out. Her nails dug into his shoulders as she braced herself, kissing the side of his head, and granting him permission with a soft, "please." Her voice turned into a wanton cry as he pushed himself into her. His tongue lapped at her throat, sucking against her skin as a feeble distraction to keep himself from fucking her before she was ready but the way her body was receiving him was making the demon tremble.

"Lu, please, I need you to fuck me," all shyness and mortification was gone and all that remained was the sexual desire and a sense of urgency.

"Do you know what you're asking of me, my dear? Do not underestimate me."

"Lucifer, fuck me or else I will invoke our pact and make you-" the rest of MC's threat was lost, replaced by a sob as Lucifer's restraint snapped and began thrusting wildly into MC. It didn't take long for him to readjust his position, turning them away from the wall. With his hands on her hips, the eldest brother moved her against his thrusts, bouncing her on his cock and slamming back into her. His rhythm would change randomly between fast and shallow to deep thrusts where he'd pull out to the tip and snap his hips to fully sheath himself. He'd felt her muscles constrict around him a few times, keeping a tally of how many orgasms he pulled from her, but he wanted her to make a mess and to make a mess of her.

Bending MC backwards, he continued drilling into her as he held her hips in-front of him. Her voice cried out in a scream as he relentlessly thrusted against that spot and she felt a wave building.

"Lu s-st, wait, I'm, you're gonna make, h-hold on-"

"I know MC, it's okay. Let go."

With Lucifer's words of encouragement, MC felt herself relax, giving in to the impending wave that continued to build. Reaching out, her hands found a shelf to stabilize herself, her mouth open in a silent scream as the dam broke and ecstasy filled her senses. The way she clamped down on his cock had Lucifer's hips stuttering through his own orgasm, filling her with his seed quicker than he had intended; the intensity of her orgasm having coaxed his to follow suit.

As the fog cleared in his mind, Lucifer's fingers twitched and he noticed the array of bruises littering her hips. MC lifted her head to look up at him, but the rest of her body was limp. She smiled sheepishly causing Lucifer to roll his eyes but his lips turned to shape a playful smile and MC giggled as he pulled her up. They winced as he pulled out of her, but she kissed his cheek and he brushed his nose against hers, humming as they basked in their afterglow together.

Lucifer grabbed a blanket to wrap around them and turned to leave the laundry room when he caught sight of the glittery purple dildo still mounted to the lid of the washing machine. He snorted and walked over to it. Having curled into the demon, MC had to turn to see why he'd stopped walking and groaned.

"Don't you dare."

"Hmm?

"You're going to say something really condescending and I don't want to hear it." MC snuggled closer into Lucifer's chest, pulling the blanket over her head in protest.

"I don't know about 'condescending,' but-"

"Lucifer, don't you fuckin do it."

"This had to been Asmo's idea."

"..."

"It just reeks of desperation and wanting to get caught."

"Lucifer!"

"Now if you had been a good human, and come to me with your situation sooner, all of this could have been avoided. But now, there's a big mess to clean up." Having lived with the demon brothers long enough and sitting thru many a famous Lucifer lecture, MC could hear the smirk in his voice. In retaliation, MC pinched the Avatar of Pride's nipple earning her a grunt and a thump on the back of her head. She hissed like a cat from behind the blanket and Lucifer sighed from the absurdity of the whole thing.

"Do you want to go get cleaned up?"

"....yes."

"Do you need me to keep carrying you?"

"...yes."

"Then be a good girl and hold this." MC pulled the blanket away from her head, curiosity having piqued her interest, but groaned when Lucifer handed her the aforementioned dildo. "I don't want the others seeing this in case the room isn't cleaned up by the time they come back from their classes."

Damn him for making perfect, logical sense.

"Besides, I might want to use it on you later."

"...I hate you."

"I know."

[thenextchapter22]

PART SIX!!

Description: You were an Angel who went to the human world to escape punishment for loving Lucifer only to be brought back into his life, this time in the Devildom where you pretend to be human.

In this chapter: You are back at the HOL...

Tags: Unrequited Love, Fluff, Angst, WIP

Pairing(s): Lucifer/Reader

Word Count: 2.5k

Link to my AO3: Click Here

Authors Note: It’s been a month and my hiatus is over now, so please enjoy this next part!! Love you guys so much ~~

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five

_+_

Being back in the House of Lamentation was a little strange. After a few extra days at Diavolo’s in that admittedly larger bedroom than yours, Lucifer had taken you back home. He bid you a quick farewell, a single hug and hair ruffling with his smirk, before he said he had duties to attend to. And things seemed back to normal with that. It was a little anticlimactic but…

Home. This was your home. Lord Diavolo gave you, an Angel (and were you still technically one, without your halo? Only wings and some leftover magic?), permission to live in the Devildom. A place for Demons, not… you. He called you ‘family’. Even Barbatos, when leaving the Castle, had smiled at you and given you a happy goodbye and an invite to tea whenever you’d like.

“Your company is always welcome,” the demon butler had said.

You stood just outside your doorway, as if turning the handle would transport you somewhere else. Maybe this was a dream. It was all too surreal to have actually happened.

Once you were inside, barely two steps in the bedroom, an invisible weight lifted off you. This was where you spent your nights, either totally alone and at peace, or with your housemates to keep you company. Studying with Satan or reading a novel and talking about the characters while sitting in your bed, or watching DevilTube with Mammon and laughing at the rom-coms because he was a sucker for those. If Asmo came back late from a party or if he was lonely and needing cuddles, you both would stay up late gossiping about everyone, and you would hear funny stories about Solomon or the brothers. When Levi would come out of his cave, and bring his handheld games, and you would battle each other for hours (you usually won only a few times but it was still fun). Eating midnight snacks you and Beel snuck out from the kitchen, waking up with crumbs in your bed and a different demon boy in your bed, Belphie, who was cuddling you and mumbling in his sleep, warm and soft, like the twins had traded you off.

The only demon brother who never came in your room was Lucifer… That man was always in his own bedroom, up late doing paperwork or wandering around doing things for Diavolo. He overworked himself constantly.

You smiled, recalling the first time you had ventured in his bedroom at night to give him some coffee and poison apples to snack on. He was grateful for it, and he smiled with crinkles in his eyes and warmth radiating from him, and he thanked you. It was one of your best moments here, with him. A small one, but still perfect.

“You’re back!!”

You jumped in surprise as your legs were attacked and you very nearly fell over. Your train of thought vanished immediately. Looking down, then seeing the mop of blonde, you realized it was just Luke.

He was a sweet Angel, still learning and growing, and he had a heart of gold. Sometimes he was a bit sensitive to the demon brothers teasing (mostly Mammon’s). It was funny to watch him get all flustered and red-faced when that happened and insult back to the best he of his abilities.

“Hi Luke,” you greeted, returning his hug. “I’m happy to see you.”

He grinned up at you, head just reaching mid-level, his chin resting on your abdomen. “I missed you. Are you feeling better? Simeon told me everything and I’m so excited to hear you’re an Angel just like us! You have to tell me all about when you lived in the Celestial Realm, please?”

Simeon chuckled from behind Luke, tugging him away gently. “Let’s leave her alone while she gets settled back in, okay? We can visit another time. We came to see Lucifer.”

Luke pouted, but sighed and nodded. He took your hand and squeezed it once. “I want to hear all about it, okay?” he asked with determination.

That was Luke, always adamant and cute. You smiled and ruffled his hair, the youngest Angel huffing. “I promise I will, Luke.”

Simeon waved goodbye, shutting the door behind him, and that left you alone in your little room. You fell onto your bed face first and inhaled deeply, rolling on your side and clutching a pillow to your chest.

Now what would happen? Things seemed to be returning to normal, but would everything?

A knock. “Are you in there Angel girl?” Belphegor’s voice came through the door.

You were a little nervous to see him, but he was the last demon brother you’d thought you’d see first. Seeing as he was usually asleep somewhere.

But when you opened the door, it wasn’t only Belphie. It was all of the brothers, minus Lucifer, and they had wide silly smiles on their faces. And then they tackled you in hugs, squeezing you and overwhelming you with their tight holds and back rubs. You just laughed and let them, knowing they probably had been worried about you after all.

“Guys—please, guys stop! I can’t breathe,” you laughed, shoving at the arms and torsos around you. Once you were free, you stepped back and smiled. Seeing all of their happy faces had your insides twisting in joy. “I missed you guys so much, it’s good to see every one of you.”

Mammon spoke first. “Damn right! We’ve been totally freaked out about you. We-well, I-I mean, I haven’t been losing sleep or anything, but they all kept asking Lucifer where you were and when you’re gonna come back. Ch, losers.” His face was flushed when he finished. Why was this white-haired demon so damn cute when he was trying to not care, you would never know the reason.

“I lost no sleep,” Belphie stated.

You chuckled. Typical Belphegor. “Well, I am sorry for worrying everyone…” You frowned, and looked at the floor. There was that inner voice telling you that even if they were all here and hugging you, it was still possible for them to dislike you for lying, hiding this entire time. “But… You don’t… hate me?”

Asmo gasped. “No, dear, we don’t hate you at all! We love you!”

That made you tear up a little bit, and Asmo cooed and hugged you. Mammon grumbled and Asmo gave you one last squeeze then let you go. Your face was a little bit red but only from the embarrassment of nearly crying when being told you were loved.

“How could we hate you? You’re still you,” Beel said.

Satan agreed. “Yes, exactly. Only now you have wings and magic we didn’t know about. You’ll have to show us sometime, I’ve never seen an Angel’s wings in person, only in textbooks. It makes sense why your grades in Celestial History are on par with my own.”

You smiled sheepishly. “Yeah, well… only up until a certain point…”

Satan chuckled. “Yes, I suppose that is true. I do want to see your wings, but we were told you’re still healing so there’s no rush.”

“Yes, we want to see them too, darling~”

“The Great Mammon should get first look.”

Waving your hands to calm them down, you nodded and agreed. “Okay, I promise I’ll show you eventually. But like Satan said I do have to take it easy for a while.”

You were planning on going for a midnight fly session tonight, though… But that was a secret that you felt comfortable keeping, like a small white lie. Hopefully no one would find out.

There was one demon who hadn’t said a word, in fact he barely hugged you like the others did. Leviathan. He was quietly standing in the doorway, fidgeting on the balls of his feet, probably waiting for his turn to say something but too shy to speak up.

“Levi? Do you have anything you want to tell me?”

He jumped in surprise, but nodded after a moment. His face flushed and he fumbled with his hands, he usually did that when he didn’t have a phone or device in them. “I-I just want to say… Please don’t ever ever EVER leave us again. I don’t know what I’d do without my midnight gaming buddy. And, well, I just—I love you, okay? You’re my Henry and you aren’t allowed to leave like that!” He was flustered when he finished and avoided eye contact with everyone.

The other boys ‘aw’ed and you smiled in happiness. It was incredible to know that no one hated you for hiding this from them.

“I won’t ever leave you, Levi.”

That was a promise you hoped to keep. These 6 demon boys here were family, your own siblings, and you loved them and all of their weird quirks.

“Hm, I want to ask you something,” Beel’s voice rang out.

Oh no, this was it. The dreaded questioning. They would want to know everything, why you left, where you were, why you lied. And you didn’t know if you had to courage to speak up.

“How did we not remember you?”

Oh thank the Heaven’s. Good kind Beel, nothing bad ever seemed to come from him. Shoving the urge to sigh appreciatively out loud because that would cause actual questions that would be difficult to answer, you instead pondered the question. Would it be against Lucifer’s wishes? He never mentioned keeping it a secret from his brothers.

And so, you told them. About Michael and their memories being tampered with. And they were livid. So livid in fact, they all transformed into their demon forms. And your room was filled with infernal magic and wings and tails flickering. It was intense, but you knew it all came from a place of love. Even Satan, who had yet to be born at the time this happened, was upset, his green tail twisting around. In the tiny space, it was a lot.

Holding up your hand, hoping this calmed them down, you spoke softly, “Please relax everyone. I’m okay now. Simeon and Lucifer helped me. No one can hurt me here.”

“And… you’re staying?” Satan asked.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

They all relaxed, and changed back to their ‘human’ forms. You felt that you could breathe again.

The silence was tense, and you swallowed thickly, trying to think of something to say. Luckily, someone else did.

Asmo clapped his hands and exclaimed, “Let’s have a movie night! Popcorn, blankets, cuddling. It’ll be so fun! It’s the perfect thing to reconnect.”

Good ole’ Asmo, you would kiss him if you didn’t think it would cause a disaster. “Yeah, let’s do it,” you agreed. “But I pick the movie. We’re watching a scary movie.” You wiggled your fingers, chuckling.

Mammon’s face dropped. “Uh, we—we should watch something else, like an Action movie. A superhero movie, those are awesome!”

“Why, are you gonna cry if we watch a horror film?” Satan teased.

“Yeah, poor Mammon’s gonna wet himself,” Belphie joked.

“He probably already has,” Levi chuckled.

Mammon growled, and reached for them with his hands, probably to strangle them, but you stuck out your hand. “Please, no fighting. We can watch a funny movie then.”

Mammon relaxed. “I didn’t care either way!” he declared.

So your bedroom was transformed into a fort of soft pillows, blankets and sheets. Satan used a spell to make the bed larger for everyone and he TV was enlarged, too. Very handy spellcasting. Beel and Levi went to get snacks and drinks, and everyone else got the room set up with pillows for everybody.

After the movie started, and everyone was situated on the huge bed, it was quiet. Everyone was scattered around with their own pillows and you felt surrounded by warmth. This was exactly what you needed, just some time with them, feeling at peace.

But the comfortable quiet did not last long.

From where Mammon was snuggled beside you, he nudged your arm and said, “So… are you gonna tell us about it?”

You blinked. “About what?”

“Your life with the humans. We want to know everything. What it was like, who you met. Oh, did you meet anyone famous?”

Satan sat up straight. “Yes, did you meet any historical figures?”

Everyone seemed to be listening in instead of watching the film now.

You thought it over, and nodded. “Yeah, a few I guess… they were ordinary people to me at the time, though… Just your fellow human helping out other humans. I tended to keep out of any major conflicts so not to affect too much. I guess just part of what I’d been taught growing up in the Celestial Realm: don’t do anything to change the path humanity will take.”

Mammon nodded. “What was one of your favorite memories?”

Wow, that was a hard question to answer. You even said so. “I lived on Earth for a long time... I have a lot of stuff packed in my head,” you chuckled.

“Aw, c’mon, there’s gotta be somethin’ that sticks out,” Mammon said. “You can’t think of one thing?”

“Oooh, what was your favorite style of outfit? Maybe those pretty dresses from the 18th century?” Asmo asked.

“Anything before the invention of the internet has to be the worst,” Levi commented.

Beel, while chewing on some popcorn, said, “The food is always gonna be good, but when the cheeseburger was created was probably my favorite time in history.”

You chuckled at each of their comments. But you did go through your favorite memories, friends’ long past and different towns flashing through your mind’s eye. Overall they were happy memories but in the end, it was always the same endgame. They died, and you moved on.

You must have made some noise or done something because Asmo made a cooing noise at you. “Oh, sweetie.” He immediately pulled you into his arms, tucking you into his neck to pet your hair. A few tear drops fell but you did sob or cry at all.

There were hands rubbing your back and arms, and you looked up to see the brother’s saddened smiling faces.

“We are here for you,” Satan reassured you, stroking his hand up and down your upper arm. His hand was warm and comforting.

Levi sniffled, and squeezed your hand. “Don’t cry anymore, you don’t need to when we can protect you now.”

Beel reached behind himself, and held out a candy bar towards you. “Hey, do you want some of my chocolate? It’s got small crunchy bits in it. And chocolate makes you feel better.” He smiled, and handed you the candy bar. It had a bite out of it, but the thought was nice.

“Thank you, Beel.”

“And here, take my blanket, you look cold.” Belphie put his small throw blanket over your lower half, making his brothers curse when it buried their own arms or hands.

You smiled up at him. “Thanks, Belphie.”

Asmo made a huffing sound. “Well, I want to play with your hair. Can I braid it, please?”

You giggled. “Go ahead, Asmo.”

You let them pamper you up, while the movie played in the background. Eventually the movie ended and Levi set up a racing game, and you all selected your characters and played together. It was a perfect first day back home.

[asteriismos]

politics - jacob thrombey

authors note : pls listen to ‘tear you apart’ by she wants revenge while reading this literally. I hope this is at least consistent i did not proofread.

warning(s) : smut, swearing, degrading stuff

words : 3.4k

summary : you’re the liberal, bernie sanders lover at your prep school and jacob is the conservative nazi. the day of your schools political rally each of you finally get rid of that underlaying tension between you two. 

“and oh my god he does this thing with his tongue and it just-”

“jesus, holly, we’re supposed to be talking about the rally,” you said to your friend, giving her daggers when you glanced at her. it was a day until the rally your private school, buxton prep, had every four years for the presidency. 

in usual democratic, liberal fasion, you were rallying for bernie sanders. since you were a senior this year you got to run the whole project, which was obviously more work than you thought it would be, but then again it would look good on college applications. it also got you out of going to the boring classes you didn’t want to go to. all you had to do was raise your hand and say you needed to do something for the rally, and the teacher would dismiss you like it was nothing. 

when you were a little freshman four years ago during the previous election, you were a part of the democratic team as well. though at that time you were just a little fourteen year old, so the seniors and juniors basically made you their lackey. you got coffee for them, baked so many cookies, and went on too many food runs you lost track of the number. you also made so many signs your fingers bled from the amount of paper cuts you got. 

overall, you were very happy that you didn’t have to do that this year. call it hazing, but it made sense that the freshman were tasked with doing all that stuff. 

at your school, which was too preppy it made rival schools want to throw up, the freshman were at the bottom of the food chain. and you had worked really hard to be the senior that you were now. you were popular, always having a group of lackeys, and had one of the best grades in your entire class. 

“. . . sorry y/n, but i am working, look at these signs,” holly said, holding up the sign she was working on. it was a nice sign. holly was purposely tasked with doing the designs because she wanted to be an art major, and she was just a sophomore so you didn’t feel bad about telling her she needed to make fifty. 

you gave her a feigning proud smile, nodding your head. “okay, whatever you say. who are you talking about anyways?”

holly looked up from her work, a blush splaying across her face. “no one, don’t worry about it, it was a one time thing.” 

her eyes, however, gave it away. they looked past you and right at the group of boys who you despised. well, some of them were good, but they were led by someone who you fucking hated it made your blood boil.

dressed in the boys uniform of your school, a dark blue sweater with a white collar popped out and black dress pants, was jacob thrombey. he was talking to some of the other boys in the senior class, motioning with his hands while he talked expressively. you looked back at holly with wide eyes, realizing that jacob was the person that she had been talking about. 

“you did not sleep with jacob thrombey,” you said, mouth agape with shock. 

holly laughed nervously. “like i said, it was a one time thing! it was at that party you said you were going to go with the group to and you never showed up. i was horny i don’t know.” 

“oh, that party, right,” you said with a shrug. you said that you would meet your group of friends at the party that colin ( another boy of the thrombey group ) was hosting this past weekend. but then the more you thought about it, the more you didn’t want to go because getting wasted on a saturday night and possibly ending up in bed with anyone from that group did not sound like a fun time. plus you wanted to take a bath and watch netflix, have a little relaxing night. “still . . . sleeping with the enemy?”

you tuned out holly’s excuses, instead searching your bag for the flyers that you thought you had put in there that you printed in the library earlier. they weren’t there, you probably just forgot to take them and left them in the library by the printer. you groaned, excusing yourself from the group and walking out of the cafeteria. 

your black dress shoes clanked against the smooth tile of the hallway. you anxiously pulled down your dark blue and black checkered skirt so that nothing you didn’t want showing was showing. the skirts were already short enough, which was a little sexist on the schools part, but it was your uniform. there was nothing that you could really do about it. 

the library was unlocked, thank god. you turned the lights on and walked in, making your way to the back to the printers. once you got there you saw your flyers sitting there where they had been left by you in second period. 

soft footsteps echoed closer to you and you turned around, seeing jacob walking over to the printers, phone in hand. suddenly the other printer next to you started up, signaling that he was printing something too. probably his own posters. 

“hey y/n,” he greeted, glancing at you and then leaning against the table, fingers tapping against the wood. 

you scoffed. “thrombey. following me?”

“no, I know this is going to be a dent in your little rich girl complex, but the world doesn’t revolve around you. i’m printing stuff for the rally,” he replied. of course he was.

jacob was running the donald trump campaign for the rally. making you hate him even more than you already did. the way that he acted like no one else in the world mattered except himself made you want to rip your hair out, and the fact that he had the audacity to act like you were the entitled one. 

instead of getting political with him ( because that would be happening all day tomorrow ), you looked at him and said, “could you maybe stop fucking my friends?”

jacob looked at you quizzically. “what do you mean?”

“holly said you hooked up with her at that party, could you maybe not fuck my friends? or if you’re going to hook up with them at least stop hooking up with sophomores. i know they’re easy and can’t see how much of an asshole you are but seriously. gross,” you scoffed. 

“are you jealous?”

you squinted at him. “no, i’m not fucking jealous. i just don’t want you to hook up with her again and then she comes crying to me because you wanted to do knife play or something.” 

jacob only laughed, taking the pile of flyers that finished printing. “why do you think i’m such a sadist?”

“because we all know those hand marks on carissa’s neck last year weren’t just a coincidence after you hooked up with her.”

he didn’t answer, instead shrugging his shoulders and watching away. you sighed, realizing that you were never going to get him to listen to anything you said ever. he was too much of an ass, luckily soon enough you never would have to see him again after you graduate. 

-

today was the day of the rally, and you were more than excited. the only problem was that you were stressed out of your mind trying to get everything set up in your large booth. everyone was either setting up the blue cookies that had been baked or getting the pins ready to hand out with sanders printed on them in large blue letters. 

“where are the shirts?” you asked one of your helpers, giving her a condescending look. “don’t tell me you left them in mrs. prescott’s classroom.”

she had. fucking god. 

you shook your head and turned on your heel, walking away from your booth and leaving someone else in charge while you were gone. you turned the corner and made your way into the big classroom. 

“what the hell are you going here?” a male voice asked. it was jacob, who was looking in a box that had your name on it. it was the box with the shirts. 

you walked over to where he was and grabbed the box away from him. “what are you doing with my shirts?”

“just looking, shitty design,” he said. 

you scoffed. “you’re an ass you know that? no one actually likes you, you have no respect from anyone but your little meathead jocks.” you meant to get him mad, but the look he gave you realized that he was in a more angry mood than he usually is.

“you think you’re such a tough bitch,” jacob yelled at you, pushing you back with such force you felt your stomach drop. his hands came to your shoulders and pushed you again, until you were pressed all the way up against the wall. your shoulder blades dug against the cold concrete, back of your head hitting against it. “you think that you’re so fucking entitled,” he went on, his body capturing yours in a hold so you couldn’t squirm out. 

your hands came to his chest, trying your best to push him away from him. his arms were pressed against the wall, still trapping you. in a leap of faith, you looked up into his piercing green eyes and gave him a smirk. “yeah? and what are you going to do about it, thrombey? teach me a lesson?” 

a sadistic smile came across his face, which made you instinctively press your thighs together, realizing how wet you actually were just looking at him, just feeling how close he was to your body. 

“you’d like that wouldn’t you? for me to teach you a lesson, fuck you until you can’t stand,” he hissed, his head ducked down and pressed hot kisses against your neck. his teeth grazed along that sweet spot and you gasped, your hands now balling up into fists on his chest. jacob laughed against your neck, using his tongue to lick a clean stripe all the way up your neck to the edge of your jaw. “amazing how much of a needy bitch you actually are. not really that tough, are we?”

“fuck you,” you said in a weak voice, feeling his hips grind against your own. he laughed again at your weak attempts to savor the last bit of dignity you had left in you, even though your own body was betraying your mind. your brain was going haywire, not knowing if you were going to push him all the way off of you and leave, or if you were going to give into the temptation. 

the latter ended up winning and you succumbed into his touch, pulling him by his shirt to kiss you. the second his lips landed on yours his tongue slipped into your mouth, fighting with your own and ultimately winning in the little power play you had going on with him. 

he pulled off your shirt, leaving you in nothing but your bra and skirt that was being hiked up by his other hand. you worked aimlessly on his own clothing, pulling off the dark blue blazer and only being left with his white collared button up undershirt to be in between the skin of both of your chests. your hands came up to take off his tie and get the buttons undone, but his own hands grabbed your wrists, tutting condescendingly. 

“that’s not how this is going to go, princess,” jacob said, pulling your hands to his belt of his black dress pants. “did you really think that i was going to let you be in control? i know that you’re a brat, but i didn’t think that you were dumb.”

you whined at his words, hating that his degrading words turned you on even more. his eyes motioned down to the ground and you quickly realized what he wanted. jacob stepped away from you enough to make you slink to your knees, hands still connected to the waistband of his pants. 

deciding to play the brat card with him, you looked up at him and said, “what do you want me to do, jacob?” it was in the most innocent tone you had ever made in your life and the look that he gave you almost made you cum in your pants right then and there. 

your hands came to palm him through his pants, keeping your eyes on him to see jacob’s head throw back with a low groan. his hands found their way to your hair, while you gave his growing bulge a light kiss. you continued to do this until his head came back to look down at you, hand moving to hold you by your jaw. “enough of this,” he spat, undoing his belt and watching as you unzipped his pants and pull them down to the ground. he took himself into his hands and pumped lazily a few times, until letting it rest on your closed lips. 

precum wiped against your kiss swollen lips as you opened your mouth, tongue falling out, waiting for him to do anything. he tutted again, other hand gripping your hair, finally pushing his dick into your mouth. he went as far as he could, hitting the back of your throat and watching you gag around it. you didn’t let yourself gag too much though, just enough to get remotely comfortable as he stilled in your throat. 

then he started moving your head up and down his cock, finding a steady rhythm that had you breathing in and out rapidly through your nose, spit dripping off his shaft and down your chin. the lewd noise that came out of your mouth made you moan, the vibrations enough to make him groan himself. 

he pulled you off of him, spit falling and getting everywhere on your face. “at least your pretty while i face fuck you, unlike your little friend holly. she just kept gagging and choking, which was hot at first, then a little sad,” he mentioned, wiping some of the spit off your chin with his thumb. 

you were about to talk to him again, until he was pushing right back into your mouth, to which you hollowed your cheeks out as much as you could to fit all of him in there. 

the sounds of his noises sent pressure right to your core, and you needed to alleviate the hot pressure that was building. sneakily ( or what you thought was sneakily ), your hands came to play with your clit, making you groan out against his dick. this caught his attention, and he pulled all the way out of you to give you a frown.

“are you actually touching yourself without my permission?” he asked, his voice teasing you and making you feel like a little girl.

your eyes widened, feeling stupid from his words and scared about what he was going to do about you getting caught in the act. he was silent, only looking at you with those dark green eyes that made you squirm under his gaze. without speaking, he pulled off the tie he was wearing and grabbed your hands, pushing your wrists together behind you. 

you couldn’t see what he was going to do until you felt the fabric bite into your skin, hearing the fabric fold into a tight knot. you tried to move your hands away from the tie and you couldn’t, they were tied together, unable to do anything. you were completely in his control now. 

“i'm sorry jacob . . . please i want to touch you,” you whined, though your voice was breaking from him ruining your throat.

he just laughed. “no, you wanted to touch yourself. don’t lie y/n, or i’ll just keep you like this and make you watch me finish myself off.” 

you hated that you found how cruel he was being hot, that it made you even more wet at the thought of him doing anything he wanted to you now that you were completely in his control. 

“get up,” he ordered, grabbing you under your arms and helping you onto your feet. it took you a moment to steady yourself since you didn’t have much balance, though you weren’t standing for long when he pulled you over a few feet away and bent you over the closest desk. your chest pressed against the cold surface, he pushed your head down too, cheek against the wood. 

he pulled you by the hair to hold you up, feeling his cock press up against you. “suck on these real quick for me princess,” jacob muttered, pushing two fingers into your mouth. you moaned against them, wiping your tongue all around them, letting your spit catch along his long digits. “good girl,” he praised, pulling them out of your mouth, pulling away your panties and inserting both of them into your aching hole. 

you yelped at the sudden pleasure, but pushed your hips against his hand, feeling him pump them in and out over and over again at an unforgiving pace. “is this what you wanted? just to be touched by someone you claim you hate,” his fingers pulled out of you, his hand landing to steady your hips. 

you heard him fumble a little bit, pushing into you after a few seconds went by. he was so big, and didn’t waste any time to let you adjust. when he bottomed out, he pulled all the way out and then back in roughly. you clenched around him, gasping breath in and out in a desperate attempt to adjust to him. 

even though he was going at an already fast pace, you could tell he was holding back. so you smirked, saying, “you said you’d fuck me till i can’t stand, but here i am standing.” jacob laughed, pulling you up by the hair again. you felt his hot breath fan against the shell of your ear as he whispered, “whatever you say.” 

his hips began rutting against you at an unbelievable pace, making you almost scream, head still being held up only by his hand in your hair. his lips kissed the skin below your ear, all the way down to the back of your neck, making you shiver and lean into his touch. 

your legs were already feeling tired, especially since your hands were still tied behind you by his tie and you couldn’t use them to hold yourself up. you felt like a limp rag doll against the desk while he pounded relentlessly into you. 

you were already so worked up that you knew you weren’t going to last very long, and surprisingly enough the way that the edge of the desk was digging into your hip bones the more you reached closer and closer to that edge. 

“fuck jacob i’m going to cum,” you yelled out, fingernails clenching into the palms of your hands. “please, please let me cum.”

“well since you asked so nicely,” jacob said. “cum then.”

you yelped out, squeezing around him and hitting your high like hitting a hard brick wall. the impact of him still rutting relentlessly and animal like into you made it hard for you to stand, riding out your high. his arm came to wrap around your waist, holding you against the desk while he chased his own high. 

the sensitivity you felt was enough to make your eyes water. jacob was not that far behind you though, giving you one last good thrust then spilling inside of you. you felt the cum enter you and fill you up, and when he pulled out you felt the liquid run down your inner thighs. 

the sounds of each of your breaths filled the room. your wrists were undone and you leaned against the desk, turning around and looking at them. there were deep purple bruises in a ring along them, and you knew those were going to be impossible to cover up with makeup to make your skin look natural.

each of you were silent while he got dressed and you cleaned him off of your thighs with a kleenex, getting dressed yourself. until you said, “you’re lucky i’m on birth control, asshole. you didn’t even ask me if you could come inside.”

“I figured you were, seemed like you,” he retorted. 

“you’re still unbelievable,” you answered, deciding to pin up your hair because there was no way you would be able to make it look normal while it was down. 

jacob tied his tie and gave himself a once over. “yeah, and you’re still a brat. see you at the rally, hopefully your voice recovers or else you’ll have to explain to all of your liberal bitches about how you got on your knees for me.”

asshole.

[dreamescapeswriting]

Cheaters Never Win ~ KTH [Request]

↬↬↬Word Count: 3.8K

↬↬↬Genre: Angst with a fluffy? Ending

↬↬↬Warning: Contains descriptions of a car accident ?

↬↬↬A/n: Hope this is okay for you sweetie, I had a lot of fun writing it whoops. Oh for the love of all things please someone help me come up with names I suck so bad at them ALSO: Please give me thoughts on the new headers?

You knew it was wrong on all levels when it first started happening but it was like you always heard people say that it was just the heat of the moment, it felt too good to stop. You looked down into the mug of coffee and then back up to your best friend who was talking about her upcoming wedding, she was excited about it and she'd asked you to be her maid of honour. 

"Are you even listening to me?" You stared back up at her and all you could see was him and the way he touched you and held you close to him. The way he would smile at you whenever you were together and the little things he would do when he thought you were asleep beside him,

"Y-Yeah, sorry. I didn't sleep much last night." You lied shaking your head to try and get out of your daydream. You guzzled down some of the coffee before taking the cup away to wash it, anything to stop you staring at your best friend, when the front door opened you almost smashing the mug in the stainless steel sink, Taehyung - her husband to be - walked through and came into the kitchen stopping when he saw you standing up to go to the kitchen sink.

"Oh, I didn't know she had guests. Nice to see you again, y/n?" He acted as though he didn't know you and it broke your heart into pieces. 

"Yeah, sorry. I was just leaving I'm late for work. Text me the details and I'll arrange everything for your bachelorette party." You said to your best friend not being able to stand in the same room as them for too long.

"I'll walk you out," Taehyung mumbled and your best friend went back to planning the seating arrangements out for her wedding. You kept your head down until you reached the front door and then you felt Tae press his front against your back, pulling you closer to him and breathing close to your ear.

"Tae." You whispered hands clutching to the door handle as you felt him pressing his hard-on against your ass, 

"We have to stop, we can't keep doing this to her." You murmured hoping that your best friend wouldn't come crashing into the hallway but she was too busy planning her dream wedding with her dream guy who coincidentally wasn't her dream guy because he was cheating on her with you, the best friend. Best friends since childhood and yet here you were betraying her trust and love but it wasn't like you could help it, you'd been in love with Taehyung since High School and never saw him again. It wasn't until they got engaged that you met him and all of this started to happen, you both knew it was all types of wrong but who was to come in the way of true love, or what you thought was true love. 

"It's not what you said last night, or when we started this." He mumbled in your ear, biting down on the lobe as he finished his sentence, your legs shook as you felt him this close to you and maybe it was the thrill of getting caught or just being with him once again but you needed him. 

"You said you loved me," He whispered into your ear and you felt your stomach churn and your eyes water as you heard him say it to you so coldly. 

"I'm late for work." You pushed yourself away from him and left through the front door leaving him standing there shocked and gazing after you. Tears rushed to your eyes as you got to your car, you didn't want to hurt your best friend you had been through so much together but Taehyung was like a drug. He kept you coming back for more and more until you couldn't resist him anymore and you were crawling back to him for another fix. You were always telling each other one more time and that was it, it would be over but it was never over and you were both always left craving more.  

You stared out of the windscreen trying to concentrate on driving instead of the first time you'd gone to Taehyung but your mind kept drifting to all of the memories and time you had together. 

"Y/n, I want you to meet my fiancée. Taehyung this is Y/n, y/n this is Taehyung." As soon as you looked up your heart stopped beating for a second, his gorgeous brown eyes were staring down into yours and you could have sworn the whole room faded away. When your friend had mentioned her fiancée Taehyung you assumed it would be someone else but not the Kim Taehyung that you had been in love with since High School. 

"Nice to meet you Taehyung." You replied cooly shaking his hand and watching as he wrapped his arm around your best friend and kissed her cheek. He was dressed up in a black suit while your best friend was wearing a white cocktail dress that made her look irresistible to everyone in the room no wonder they were together, the perfect couple perfect for each other both inside and out.

"I'm going to get a drink." You mumbled to your friend turning around and heading towards the bar, Taehyung gazed after you wondering where he knew you from and why you seemed to be anxious around him, it was going to bug him all night until he found out where he knew you from.

"How do you know y/n again?" He asked as he twirled a piece of his fiancée's hair around his finger smiling down at her as she gazed up into his eyes. 

"Friends from childhood, we sort of drifted in High school because she attended somewhere else," She went on to explain which school you moved to and that was when it hit him and he knew you. 

"Want something to drink?" She nodded and Taehyung left her going over to the bar and standing beside you. 

"Oh. Hi." You laughed nervously as you felt him standing beside you, while you were staring at the drinks in front of you Taehyung was staring down at you trying to size you up and figure out what was going on inside of your head. 

"Hey, I know where I know you from now." You swallowed the lump that was beginning to form in your throat and hummed trying not to seem afraid of him when you felt his hand on your lower back and your heart rate quickened.

"We went to school together, you were the geeky little nerd that had the biggest crush on me." He was standing so close to you that you could smell his cologne and you could feel his breath next to your neck,

"Must have me confused with someone else." You whispered it had been years since you were in school and yet the silly little high school crush you'd worked so hard to get over was still effecting you this badly.

"See I don't think I do." He smirked at the sight of the vein in your neck pumping quickly and he knew it was you, 

"Look, I found it cute," He reached out and moved some of your hair out of your face and you glanced over at him for a second, allowing yourself to imagine what it would be like to be with him before turning to the barman and ordering a drink. 

"Thanks." You mumbled taking the glass and practically downing the liquid courage before leaving Taehyung at the bar alone and going to find your other friends that had been invited to the party. 

 "My husband owns a car company." Your best friend had dragged you over to introduce you to her new work friends and you had spent the last twenty minutes listening to them all drown on about their partners and lovers, where they lived and what they were doing with their homes.

"What about you Y/n? What does your husband do?" You choked on the drink you were attempting to swallow and your best friend started laughing playfully before teasing you, 

"Oh y/n doesn't have a husband-"

"Oh...Wife?" The blonde that had been talking about the car company questioned and you shook your head again going to speak for yourself when your best friend did. 

"Never been one for finding true love have you?" You ignored their giggles and laughter by downing the rest of your drink and excusing yourself to go and buy another one from the bar. 

"Might want to slow down." You glanced over to see Taehyung standing beside you again and you groaned, the alcohol in your system giving you the sudden confidence boost to stand up to him and actually speak. 

"I can do what I want. Why are you over here and not with your fiancée?" He chuckled as you slurred a little on your words, it was funny seeing the one he knew as geeky and quiet suddenly standing up for themselves and making it known that you didn't want him there beside you.

"I think you've had too much to drink." The barman walked away when he got the look from Taehyung and you scoffed rolling your eyes and him and walking away going back to your best friend and let her know you were going to go home. 

"Are you sure you'll be okay? Tae!" Taehyung came bonding over with a smile on his face greeting his fiancée with a kiss on the lips earning an 'awe' from all her friends. 

"Will you take them home? I don't want them to get into any trouble." Taehyung agreed and you tried not to act disgusted in front of your best friend giving her a hug and ignoring the lingering looks you were getting from her co-workers as you walked away from them with Taehyung by your side. 

 The apartment was spinning when you sat down on your bed and you looked to see Taehyung had followed you into your bedroom, 

"You didn't have to walk me to my room." You told him sobering up by the minute, you'd chugged a bottle of water in his car and the influences of the alcohol were starting to wear off you and you were coming back to reality once again.

"I want to make sure you got in okay." You nodded at him and clapped your hands together looking around your room, 

"I got in okay, you can leave now." You got up and started backing him towards the bedroom door when he wrapped his arms around your waist and looked down at you taking in a deep breath, 

"I can see that but do you really want me to leave?" Your answer should have been no, it should always be no he was engaged to your best friend but your mind was spinning and your world was on fire at the way he was holding you. 

"I thought so." He whispered leaning down before placing his lips on yours, all at once, your body kicked into hyperdrive your arms wrapping around the back of his neck so your hands could tangle into his hair as though it was a natural thing for you to do. His hands sat on your waist pushing you back towards the bed where he laid you down and began kissing down your neck - be careful not to leave love bites anywhere since you were expected to go out tomorrow - he smirked when you let out a whine and he took it as an encouragement to keep going. Your mind was blank except for only thoughts of him images of him being engaged were gone and all you could picture was you and him together all night, he pulled away from your neck and cupped your cheek in his hand running his thumb under your eye as you stared up into his pool of brown ones.

"You're so beautiful," He whispered bending down and reconnecting your lips once more his hands working to take off your clothes.

"Fuck." You wiped the tears out from under your eyes as you reached the red light you stared up at the light waiting for it to turn green trying to ignore the pressing thoughts in your head begging you to think of Taehyung but you couldn't, your heart broke but not because you were leaving Taehyung behind at that house but because of what you had been doing for the last year and a half to your best friend without her knowledge. The light signalled that you could go and you continued driving trying to push down the thoughts of your last night together, the night before today when everything seemed perfect. 

Taehyung was drawing small invisible patterns into your naked back as you laid with your head on his chest listening to his heartbeat. You were laid together in some downtown motel just talking after a night of passion together, he was humming to you softly while asking you silly questions, 

"It's your turn," He chuckled nudging you gently and you didn't even think before blurting your question out. 

"Do you ever think about the future-" You stopped yourself as the memories of your best friend came to your mind, how she was waiting at home in their beautiful house waiting for him. You sat up bringing the sheets with you and you started looking around the room for your clothes, 

"What's wrong?" He questioned frowning as you got out of the bed and began hopping around the room and searching for everything that he'd ripped off you earlier in the night. 

"What's wrong?! Tae, this, us is what's wrong...We shouldn't...I should never have-" You began crying unable to control your emotions anymore and he helped you find your clothes which were scattered around the room.

"Y/n, talk to me about this don't just walk away." You stared down at his hand and then up to his face. 

"In less than a month you will be married to her...do you feel that little for her?"

"What about you?! You're her best friend and yet here you are meeting me all the time..." You swallowed the lump in your throat you knew he was right and he was always going to be right. 

"I love you and I love her which is why I'm stopping this...It ends tonight. No more meeting up, no more late-night sneaking out to fuck and no more seeing each other unless she's there." You mumbled and he watched as you pulled your hoodie on over your head and he stared at you hearing you say the words he'd been dying to hear from you but now he was frozen and didn't know what to do with it.

"Goodbye Tae." You slammed the motel door behind you and left to find your car sitting in the parking lot and drove yourself home for another night of laying alone and wishing he was there with you when he was really at home with his beautiful fiancée and planning his life together with her. 

There was no future for you and him and you'd made that clear when you questioned him about it that night, you shook your head pulling up to the next red light and stopping.

"Stop fucking crying, you're disgusting." You mumbled to yourself wiping your face and pulling out once the light was green then out of nowhere it was like someone had shaken you awake your body jerked from side to side as your forehead collided with the window and wheel that your hands were glued to the as you tried to control your slipping car but it was no use, the car was spinning out of control and you hit the pavement sending the car spinning into the ditch below you. 

"Shit!" You screamed out as your head hit the glass window again giving you an instant headache and sent blood trickling down the side of your head. The seatbelt was tugging on your skin and the airbag that had deployed was hurting your head as you tried to move but it was no use. The seatbelt was caught in its place and you could smell toxic fumes leaking from your car, 

"HELP!" You screamed out begging that someone would be around to help you, 

"Hello!?" You heard a rough voice call out before coughing, 

"Hey! Hey! Down here! Help!" You called out seeing a pair of legs at the top of a small hill, you must have rolled into a ditch and the man called out that he was going to help you out. 

"Can you get out?" His voice was fading in and out of your hearing and your head was starting to spin, you knew you were going to pass out so you had to do something, anything, to keep you awake so you tried to talk to the man but your words were slurring and the world was starting to get darker with each passing second. 

"Hey now, don't fall asleep on me. I'm right here, I'll get you out." He was beside your car door now and you looked up at him to see he was dressed in a fireman's outfit, your eyes closed heavily opening again to see Taehyung standing there and crying. 

"Y/n! Stay awake! You can't sleep! Come on, I'll help you out!" You frowned looking at the man that you thought was Taehyung but was really a confused fireman wondering why you were staring at him without answering any of the questions he was asking you.

"Tae, I love you." You mumbled as you felt your eyes getting heavier, 

"You can tell Tae that when you're out of here come on," The image of Tae slowly faded away and you were left with the fireman who was struggling to undo your seatbelt and the next thing you knew everything was fading away, the sounds of the metal cutters, the yelling of firemen, everything was fading until it was just gone.

The irritable beeping is what woke you up first it was constantly there playing in the back of your head and you were trying to turn it off as though it was an alarm but when you went to move your arm you found that you couldn't, it was as if it was weighed down by something your eyes fluttered open to see someone laying their head on your arm you frowned before glancing around the room and noticing you were sitting in a bright white room wearing a blue gown with a blue blanket laying over you. 

"Ah, Y/n. You're awake." A doctor said as he entered the room and stared at you, he glanced down at your chart and began talking about a bunch of things you didn't understand. You couldn't remember anything that had happened and why you were in the hospital, 

"I'll give you two a minute." The body that had been weighing your arm down moved and you looked to see that it was Taehyung sitting there with his eyes a bright red colour and his black curly hair a mess. 

"Tae?" He looked at you and nodded reaching out and running his hand over your face, images of being in the car flashed back into your head and then the images of the night before. You tried to move away from him but he held your face tighter in his grasp not wanting you to move away from him. 

"The hospital called me after the fireman said you'd said my name..." You looked down at your hands not wanting to look at him for too long, you'd broken things off and no car accident was going to change that. 

"Must have been too whacked out." You mumbled to him and he took hold of your hand being careful of the IV drip that was in there and he sighed.

"Look I've been thinking about what you said...About the future and I want you in it. I need you in my future," You were gazing into his eyes when the door opened, 

"Taehyung? What are you doing here? Why did the hospital call you?" His hand left yours when you heard his fiancée's voice and you looked over at her wondering what you could say to make this seem less weird for her but she already knew there was something going on since Taehyung stared back at you once he saw her enter the room, 

"He was the last person in my call log, I was planning a surprise and I shouldn't have been on my phone which is how I ended up here." Taehyung shook his head, 

"It's not true...The truth is that --" Neither of you spoke for a couple of seconds before he took her out of the room and began explaining everything to her. She stared at you through the glass window into your room and you knew that he was telling her the truth, the look on her face was saying everything that needed to be said. 

"Never come near me! Ever again! You disgust me!" She screamed as she came into the room throwing her engagement ring at you, you threw it off the bed and watched as she left down the hallway. Taehyung came back into the room and looked at you sadly. 

"You told her everything?" He nodded and you looked down at your hands not knowing what to do with yourself now and he came over to you taking your hand in his and continuing with what he was saying before,

"I want a future with you...Only you." In that one moment, nothing mattered anymore as long as he continued to hold you like he was right now. 

"How do I know-"

"It's only ever always been you I was in love with, no one else. Even in school when you were the nerd that kept to themselves. It's only ever always been you." He whispered looking down at you with those big eyes that made you weak the knees. You were sure that if You had been standing up you would have fallen over and he leant down leaving a kiss on your lips and smiling as you kissed him back. 

"When the time is right and I've sorted everything out with her...I'll take you out a real date. Somewhere nice, somewhere fancy where I can show you off." He promised as he pulled away from the kiss running his fingers over your skin and smiling softly at the way you shivered at his touch. Even after a year he still had that everlasting effect on you that you didn't think would ever change. 

"I love you," He whispered again kissing your forehead, 

"I love you too."

Tagline: 

@writingdreamsnottragedies @yoongisdumplingcheeks @snowy-meowl @lynnthevirgo @jooniesdarlingdimples @chimchims-stories-and-tales @fan-ati--c @lyoongx @mitzwinchester @callingmyangel @rjsmochii @btsiguess-kpop

[onyourzeus]

• in the mood for love | pjh

ykcyj ➝ arskyh

title: in the mood for love pairing: park jaehyung (jae of day6) & you genre: FLUFF words: 2.6k

author’s note: requested by this anon asking for a valentine’s day headcanon for our #1 twitch streamer, jae. i’ve never done headcanons before, so i kind of spun this in both ways: how i think he’d spend a special day with his s/o, and turn it into a fic(ish?) ngl these are fun to do

any requests? check my pinned post if i’m accepting any at the moment, thanks!

jae wouldn’t be the biggest fan of valentine’s day

as in, having one specific day assigned throughout the whole year

for you to hail gifts and love notes and roses and chocolates to the one person you love 

yeah, he’d definitely be the “complaining” type, that is to say

before he met you 

your relationship stands in the middle of being frenemies and actually romantically involved

there is never a day that jae corrects you on some weird unheard of factoid 

(in which case he gets it wrong 95% of the time) 

nor can you get away from his ridiculous antics that just tip you over the edge slightly 

like, putting your favorite snack on the highest shelf he knows you can’t reach 

or bombarding you with memes through texts while he’s in the bathroom

forcing you to play phasmaphobia, promising he won’t lock you in the room with the ghost 

and proceeds to do exactly that plus runs away without you

where’s the team effort in that? 

anyway, that’s basically the gist of your life having him as your boyfriend

so for valentine’s day, you know it would either just be 

a chill day at his apartment, maybe play games that would resort to turning into a fiery competition

or watch the latest release of your favorite animes while he talks over every two minutes about a theory he developed prior 

OR… hmm, well, you’re not really sure

this would be the first valentine’s you’d spend with him; and you’re very much aware for his

lack of fondness for the holiday

the days leading up to it, the only thing you’d hear from him is complaints upon complaints of this capitalistic expenditure that should be abolished

you know he jests, but you feel a little saddened

you spent so much time making a scrapbook for the memories you both shared in the few months you’ve been together

it’s not a lot, you rarely do intricate craftwork like this, but you were feeling sentimental 

there’s polaroids of him streaming on twitch with you sneakily taking the picture from the side

a polaroid of the two of you at your apartment eating take out while drinking a little alc

even a picture of yourself which he took when you were knocked out on the couch, waiting for him to finish band practice

for an added touch, you wrote down cute (or snarky, it depends on how he views it) comments on each polaroid, just to make it more personalized

the nervousness hits you, what if he thinks this is all too much? too clingy? he didn’t ask for this, that’s for sure

but it was made with the labor of love, and it just so happens that the 14th was the day you started dating him… yeah, maybe you can make that as an excuse instead 

usually, the both for you don’t really celebrate ~*~monthsaries~*~ and that’s okay

he’s busy with work and you have other duties to attend to as well— but one special gift shouldn’t be the cause of a problem, right? 

on the day of ~*~love~*~, jae had some meetings at the company bldg. and so you ask if there’s a time during the night you guys can hang out

he doesn’t respond until a few hours later, and the whole time your heart sank deeper and deeper into the pit of your stomach

you just have to accept him for who he is, you sigh, or maybe he’s just caught up with band stuff, which is usually the case— and you’re never not 100% supportive

he texts you that you can come over at his apartment, and for a little your excitement bounces back 

“sorry for the late reply, the boys were here for a lil” he adds, and you’re confused— did that mean they’re still hanging out at his place? oh

you try not to think of it too much, having expectations beyond reality is what breaks a lot of relationships

and you have to remind yourself: jae isn’t like that, and you like jae for jae

you still bring the scrapbook with you, and ought to leave it under his bed or something so he finds a surprise later on (considering the possibility that you’re accompanied by 4 of his best friends during your 6 month anniversary and valentine’s day)

you arrive at his doorstep, anxiety soaring out of your chest for some reason. with the spare key he had entrusted you with, you open the door

it’s dark

way too dark

is this a prank? is he trying to conflate halloween with valentine’s day 

“jae i swear to god if—” 

and the lights turn on, but it’s not his house lights. they’re fairy lights. all strewn across the hall (where did he get that?)

little heart cut outs of different shades of red and pink seem to be taped all over the walls 

you hear soft piano music humming from his speakers in the living room 

but there is no jae in sight

“jae, what…” you’re at a loss for words

he pops out of his bedroom, trying hard not to grin so widely at you

“you called?” he says in the most annoying, teasing voice in which you can’t help but laugh-cry at 

“wait wait wait this wasn’t the reaction i was going for” he says in panic, walking towards you and the sight of him just makes you cry a little harder

he’s wearing a tux inside his own house, and he’s holding a rose that’s bound to be crushed the moment he comes over to hug you

“wait, no the rose,” you say in between sniffles, taking it from his grasp and settling it on the coffee table

jae pauses, looks at you in a daze

you’re pouting, and you want to admire his outfit but also punch his silly face but he’s smiling at you and you’re embarrassed

“are you sad?” he asks a matter of factly, arms still spread open waiting for your approval for him to embrace you

“if you don’t hug me in the next three second i will be—” 

“i would be the worst person to ever exist in the world to do that to you,” he says in your ear, and you soon feel yourself melting into his embrace

he’s so warm

and so tall

and so confusing you kind of just want to poke him where it hurts 

but you indulge in the comfort of his presence

until you realize that you’re wrinkling his precious suit

“ok hol up” you interrupt the adorable moment, and jae seems to look confused 

“wha” 

“what’s all this?” you finally get the courage to ask, dried up tears on your cheeks yet a hopeful spark igniting in your chest 

“well, i uh,” this is ultimate Jae Trying to Find Excuses with Futile Attempts To Do So 101 

“did you really have a meeting today?” no answer

“did the boys help you with all this?” your head turns to look at all the cheesy decorations in the room

still no answer

just jae avoiding your suspicious stare, even whistling comically 

“jae!” your nervousness from a while ago comes out as relief, and bubbling laughter as you playfully shake him for an answer “i thought valentine’s suck and we’re too good for that”

“you’re never too good for anything, well. except for me, you’re too good for me,” he finally lets up, wiping whats left of the moist tears on your face with a soft caress. his voice was soft, too, and it’s a refreshing and wanted feeling to hear him speak to you this way 

“i know i can be a jerk about those kinds of things but… after meeting you, i think you deserve just the best,” he continues, finding your hand and holding onto it tight. “this isn’t even half of it” 

“there’s more?” you quip, already satisfied with the cutesy re-decor of his apartment, but once he leads you to the island counter you see two plates filled with dinner food, and wine glasses ready to be poured with what seems to be red wine on the side

the vase in the middle was empty, and  so you accept the rose that jae had picked up from the table, and carefully place it in its new home

“i’m… impressed. you did this?” you say

“if i said yes would you believe me”

“never,” you reply, knowing that younghyun probably had a little helping hand in here too

“well there you go, you know me better than myself already,” jae winks, and something flutters within you that causes your head to feel so light and just. focus on jae

pulling out the chair, he signals for you sit down with a royal gesture “before you, milady”

you’re laughing now, smiling from ear to ear at how ridiculous jae sounds but at the same time the two of you are having so much fun

you fall back into normal conversations with more banter than regular small talk; it’s so easy to be yourself with him 

you keep admiring the suit he’s wearing, even his hair is slicked back with gel to cast the perfect valentine’s day look. you compliment him in between bites, and then mutter under your breath that you should have worn something just as elegant

“this wasn’t my idea,” he defends, and you’re sure one of the boys dared him to do it

“still, i don’t look the part as your date,” you half-joke, but your tone sounded sadder than you anticipated

“this,” jae says, looking at you and only you. for a moment you can’t find your breath

“you. this is you. and that’s who i love”

you’re smitten. that’s it pack up your bags this is it

“jae maybe ease up on the red wine?”

“shutup youknowyouloveit” 

finally, you finish up the meal and you’re full

of food and love 

he tells you to just chill by the couch as he gets something from his room, and you wonder what else he has up his sleeve

you’re grateful for bringing the polaroid camera with you to commemorate something so rare 

but as you’re trying to take it out of your bag, you see the scrapbook (it’s hard to miss) and pull that out instead

should you give it to him now? or later? 

while you contemplate on this, flipping the pages of the book jae has sprung up behind you

“hey i was looking for that picture of you all sleepy and drooling” 

“JAE WHAT THE HELL”

you jump from surprise, almost flailing the scrapbook in the process as you see jae laughing his ass off from behind

you notice he has his guitar with him now (???)

“did you do this for me?” he sits next to you, setting the guitar on the side as you begrudgingly give him your gift. all of a sudden the unknown fear creeps up again and you hide your face in your hands

you hear him turn the page, a quiet pause, maybe a chuckle or two, and rinse repeat

“are you done????” 

“no give me about ten hours”

“WHAT”

“i’m kidding, dude, this is amazing” 

give it to jae to call you dude while in a relationship with you

but that’s when you know he’s genuine with his words

“i wasn’t expecting anything like this at all. this is so so so good, i love it. a lot,” he keeps complimenting you and it’s so hard to look at him when you’re red in the face and heart beating a mile a minute 

“it’s nothing… i thought it’d feel too much since we haven’t been together long,” you confess, finally giving into seeing what jae looks like

he pout 

he attac you with a flick on the forehead

and a pat on top of your head

“i don’t see it that way,” he says, sincerely. then he brings his guitar on his lap, and prepares his form as if he’s… about to sing something

the music from the speakers was soft enough to not disrupt his singing and guitar skills

you are one if not the biggest fan of jae and his band

and also, of eaJ 

so you are very well aware of every song he’s put out there even winning five times in a self-induced contest as to who knows the lyrics better: the actual band member or the significant other

but what he’s singing for you right now

what those fingers plucking romantic melodies on the guitar strings

you haven’t heard of it before

and yet your heart feels so connected, so in awe of the way jae passionately sings in front of you

the man is shy okay, he’s a genius in his craft but when it comes to doing it in front of you he clamps up like a toddler on his first day alone in school

but right now, you don’t see any of that. you see jae singing words of happiness, admiration, love

for you

and he might not be meeting your eyes right now, it’s okay, cause you’re crying again anyway 

you don’t want him to stop

you close your eyes and feel his words embed themselves in your mind

you want to keep this memory close to you, even if you can’t take a picture 

it’ll ruin how special this moment is, really

it was short, sweet, but you’re not complaining

he finishes with a soft strum, and then finally sees your face in tears again

“i’m a bad boyfriend aren’t i,” he whines and he is met with the forceful (hint: soft) punches on his chest

“you’re literally the best bf ever wtf are u on about” 

face wet, cheeks red, neck feeling warm from the wine

you’re a mess it’s as if you got dumped on valentine’s instead of serenaded by the love of your life

“why do you look like you got broken up on valentine’s instead of being—”

“yes jae i know” 

“did you like it though? it’s unfinished but, i figured i wanted you to be the first to hear it”

“since...well.. it’s a song about you” 

:( he wipes the tears with his thumb, and you steal a quick kiss on his lips 

“i love it, and i love you so much u dork” 

“i take it back you’ll never hear the finished version of this song”

“HEY” 

(spoiler alert: he now keeps bugging you for more supportive comments and suggestions on the song) 

(another spoiler alert: the night ended up the way you guys love spending time together: basking in each other’s company)

only this time, there’s poorly cut out hearts all over the walls 

and there’s jae drunkenly mistaking lyrics of his song for another

and you singing along off-tune

happy valentine’s you two :)

[cpd5021]

Ghost

One-shot where Hailey see’s someone from her past and it sends her into a tailspin. Can Jay help to pull herself back up before she loses herself completely? 

     Jay sat across from Hailey, their easy banter pairing well with their lunch. This diner was one of Hailey’s favorite’s, which may be why he suggested it so often. He smiled as he watched her recount a story involving Adam getting scolded by Platt and she laughed uncontrollably as she described his terror. He couldn’t blame the younger officer for being afraid, Platt scared everyone. But more so Jay loved the glint in Hailey’s eyes when she laughed. She finished her story, wiping at a tear caused by laughing so hard and her eyes met his. And there is was again. Their spark, the chemistry, whatever you wanted to call it...they had it. Their eyes lingered on each other for a little too long before they both looked away, Jay feigning interest in his fries and Hailey playing with her napkin. The radio on the table between them started to speak and Jay was happy for the interruption. 

Attention any available units; reports of a drunk and disorderly dispute at O'Brien's; fight in progress; no patrol close at this time.

“That’s just a few blocks from here, let’s go.” Jay stood, tossing some bills on the table. Hailey grumbled, taking one more sip of her soda before standing and following Jay quickly out the door. Approaching the bar, they could hear the chaos ensuing within. 

“Who is drunk and already fighting at 11:30?” Jay chuckled down at her before pushing the door open and entering the bar. 

     Hailey moved beside Jay as they quickly assessed the scene before jumping in. The pair of men going at it on the ground was easy to spot in the middle of the bar. Jay rushed over, grabbing the man on top by the back of his shirt and pulling him off before he could deliver another blow. 

“This son of a bitch started it!” The man protested, spitting towards the man still on the ground. Jay pulled the guy further away, starting to lead him towards the patrol man that had finally arrived on scene. He glanced back to make sure Hailey was handling the other guy okay when he stopped suddenly, realizing Hailey was frozen in place staring down at the battered man. Jay practically tossed his guy into the waiting patrol man and hurried back to Hailey. He noted her quick sideways glance at him before she turned and bolted from the bar. Jay watched as her small frame shoved the door open, rushing into the daylight that was stark contrast to the dimly lit bar. He faltered for a moment, eyes darting between the door and guy still laying on the ground, groaning and holding his face. A second officer stepped beside him and Jay registered the patrolman asking Jay a question, but the words were mumbled as his focus was only on Hailey. 

“Huh?” He shook his head, bringing himself back to the moment. 

“Is this guy good?” The officer repeated, looking mildly annoyed. 

“Uh, he probably needs some medical attention. And the other guy said he started it.” Jay rambled off quickly, before turning to go find Hailey. 

     Jay entered the daylight, blinking as his eyes adjusted. He scanned the side walk where the crowd had dispersed out into but her blonde hair and tiny frame were no where to be seen. Jay began to walk back towards the diner, where they had left the truck, his eyes scanning every side street and alley along the way. He tried to call her but it went straight to voicemail. Jay tried to ignore the panic starting to settle in his chest. Rounding the corner into the lot where the truck was parked, he let out a sigh of relief as he saw her leaning against the vehicle. Her body faced the truck, her hands grasping the wall of the truck bed as if she needed it to hold her up, and even from a distance he could tell she was visibly upset. 

“Hailey...” He all but whispered her name, not wanting to spook her. He wasn’t sure she heard him so he tried again. “Hails?” Louder this time. He watched as she slowly shook her head and he took that as a sign she knew he was behind her. 

    Jay slowly stepped closer to her, his heart breaking as he could see now that her body was trembling. He wasn’t sure if he should reach out to touch her or if that would only scare her more. Slowly, her face turned to meet his and her eyes said she was somewhere else entirely. 

“Hailey.” He repeated her name again, trying to bring her back. “It’s okay, I’m here...” He wasn’t sure how to proceed, he’d never seen her like this before. 

     Hailey’s hand shook in front of her as she repeatedly made fists, only to release them before doing it again. Her face was pale and her eyes brimmed with tears. 

“Hailey...how can I help?” Jay took another step closer. This movement got her attention and she jumped slightly before shaking her head, seemingly back with him now. Her eyes were cold when they met his and despite the tears still trailing her cheeks her face fell emotionless. 

“Let’s go.” Was all she said. Hailey turned and climbed into the truck without giving him another look. 

     Jay swallowed hard before moving around to his side of the truck and hesitantly getting in. He looked at her as she stared out the window, body motionless, breathing slow. Her fists continued to clench and unclench, but that was the only movement she gave.

“Hailey?” Jay pushed again, trying to figure this out. 

“Let’s go.” She repeated, her voice sounding dead. 

    Jay drove them back to the precinct, his eyes darting to her every so often, only to find her in the same state. They pulled into the lot and Hailey was out of the truck before Jay even put it in park. He watched as she swiftly entered the building, disappearing from his view and causing that panicked feeling to escalate. He got out and followed her in, not sure what the rest of the day would bring. As he walked into intelligence, Jay quickly noticed that she was missing. He walked over to Rojas’s desk and asked if she had seen Hailey.

“Wasn’t she with you?” Vanessa sent him a quizzical look.

“Uh yea, I was just wondering if she made it up here yet.” Jay shook his head, shrugging his question off and walked away leaving the younger girl staring after him confused. He didn’t find her in the break room, so he walked towards the locker room. As he pushed the door open he was met with silence, glancing around the room quickly and almost walking out before he heard something coming from the back of the locker room near the bathroom. Jay walked that way, pausing suddenly when he heard someone getting sick, the sound of retching filled the air. Jay carefully peaked his head around the corner and his heart shattered again as he saw Hailey’s small frame bent over the trash can, her body heaving into it. Jay made his was to the sink, grabbing some paper towel and wetting it before turning to face her. The retching had stopped but she still hovered over the can, hands tightly gripping the sides. He reached his hand out, offering her the towel and her red rimmed eyes briefly met his. 

“Sorry.” She choked out, voice hoarse. 

“It’s okay...” Jay gave her a small, unsure smile as she wiped her mouth. “What happened back there? Who was that asshole?” Jay had managed to put two and two together and realized that whoever that man was is what had spurred her shutdown. 

“That asshole...” Hailey started, her body trembling again before her face grimaced and she heaved into the garbage can again. Jay moved to her side, holding her hair and placing a gentle hand on her back. 

   Once she regained a little composure, she stood back up to face him. Although her eyes never met his as they darted everywhere around the room but his. 

“That asshole..” Hailey chuckled, but it wasn’t a humorous, instead it was cold, somehow dark. “Was my father.” Hailey tossed the paper towel into the trash can. Her eyes briefly met his and she quickly turned and left the room before he could stop her. Jay stood there, processing her words as he finally understood her response to seeing the man on the ground. He wasn’t sure if he should follow after her or give her the space to process it. Jay knew that she would talk to him when she was ready, he would make sure of that. 

                                                     **********

     Jay had decided to let her be for the remainder of the day, letting her work through whatever she needed to. Unfortunately, his plan to talk after work proved to be impossible. Hailey had left without a word to anyone and when he called her it went straight to voicemail. Jay sat outside her house for almost a half hour before he mustered up the courage to go knock. He sighed when even ringing the doorbell went unanswered. He debated waiting until Vanessa got home, thinking he could make his way in when she got home from Molly’s but decided at that point Hailey would be hopefully sleeping. Giving up, he headed home only to spend the night sleeplessly worrying about his partner. 

     Morning came and Jay glanced at his phone, hoping she had responded to one of his many texts or calls, but his screen was blank. Jay sighed and got out of bed, quickly showering and heading out the door. He stopped for coffee and a bagel, her favorite, and was waiting in the lot by his truck when she pulled in. Hailey glanced over to him and the look on her face said she was considering bolting away. His smile faltered when she looked anywhere but him, although she did walk over to him so he took that as a small win. 

“Morning.” He decided to play it cool, feel her out. 

“Morning.” She clipped back, voice as cold as yesterday. 

    Jay reached out to hand her the coffee and bagel, earning a smile that he knew was fake. 

“Thanks Jay.” Hailey said, turning away and walking fast towards the building. 

    It was another slow day in intelligence, everyone sat around tying up loose ends or finishing up paper work that had been forgotten. Jay debated asking her if she wanted to grab some lunch, but knew she would probably turn him down. The bagel from this morning sat untouched on her desk. The silence was broke by Platt clambering up the stairs, holding yet another box of files to be sorted through. 

“Who wants it?” She barked, not waiting for a response before setting it down on Adams desk. He started to huff out a protest before catching himself and only nodding her way. “Oh and Upton, you have a visitor.”

 “Huh?” Hailey’s head shot up, a confused look covering her face. She wasn’t able to process the words before she saw the man walking up the stairs. 

    Jay watched from his desk as the color drained from her face, a sickening pale settling in rapidly. Her eyes, normally bright blue, were dark as she slowly stood from her chair. Jay had half a mind to stop the mans approach, but he didn’t want to cause a scene for Hailey...unless he needed to. 

“Buttercup!” Her dad announced loudly, stretching his arms out wide and drawing her into a hug. Jay watched as he could see her body shutting down, all defensive mechanisms going out the window as she didn’t fight the mans embrace at all. He glanced around and saw the team looking over at the pair, most smiling at what appeared to be a happy surprise. Jay’s eyes met Adams and the two shared a silent conversation, neither smiling and both knowing this moment wasn’t what it seemed. So Adam knew. This fact didn’t really surprise Jay as he knew they had been together briefly, but it still stung a little knowing she had obviously told him first. Jay’s eyes went back to Hailey, her body ridged as she struggled to maintain the facade of a happy family reunion. Jay heard the man offer to take her to lunch, he heard her turn him down, and he definitely  heard the nasty comment her father muttered low enough that no one else could hear. Jay fought back the urge to remove the man from her presence, maybe add a few more bruises to his already battered face, but he decided to let it play out. Hailey could handle herself, mostly. 

    After what felt like an eternity, her father finally left. Mentioning loudly that they needed to catch up because he missed her terribly, before walking back down the steps and hopefully out of her life for good. Jay watched as he left, then turning his eyes back to see Hailey’s body disappearing down the hall at a rapid pace. Jay stood, eyes briefly meeting Adams again, before following after her. He heard the door to the locker room slam shut but that didn’t stop him from entering right behind her. The sight that met his eyes when he walked in broke him again. Hailey paced frantically around the room, shaking her hands and struggling to catch her breath. Her eyes fell on his and he saw her lip quiver. Her hand moved up to cover her face, shielding the tears he knew were threatening to fall.

“I’m fine Jay. Leave me alone.” Her voice broke, thick with the emotion she was struggling to control. He wasn’t about to leave her, making that clear by taking another step towards her. Hailey rubbed at her eyes, pointer finger and thumb pressing into her eye sockets, trying to push away the tears. He could see her face scrunch up and her chin quiver again as she was losing the fight against herself. He took another step closer earning him another shout. 

“I’m fine.” Her words came out in a sob and he closed the distance between them, pulling her into his arms as she fell apart. He wasn’t sure how long they stood there, him holding her silently as she was a mess in his arms. Eventually, her sobs slowed into sniffs and he could feel her breathing come under control again. He held her tightly until he felt her wiggle in his arms, signaling she was okay for him to let go. He let her step back but kept his hands on her shoulders, guiding her to sit on the bench beside them. Jay wanted to say something, but he wasn’t sure what she needed to hear. 

“I haven’t seen him in years.” Hailey spoke quietly, eyes telling him she was somewhere far away right now. He could only imagine what she was seeing. “I left...I couldn’t handle it anymore. The same cycle repeating over and over. I tried to help her, to get her out, but she wouldn’t leave. She kept telling me everything was fine. It wasn’t, it never was. But I couldn’t watch it anymore. So I left.” Hailey sighed beside him, eyes glancing to meet his, hers still brimming with tears. “So when I saw him laying there, it was such a shock to my system. Like I was seeing a ghost. I couldn’t process it. Couldn’t escape the flashbacks...” She trailed off, hanging her head slightly and rubbing away more tears.

“I’m..so sorry Hailey.” Jay said quietly, his hand still resting on her shoulder.

“I’m sorry too.” She gave him a small, weak smile.

“For what?” He asked, exasperated. 

“For scaring you.” She gave him a knowing look and he couldn’t help but chuckle. Even when her world was falling apart she could still read him like an open book and was still concerned with his feelings over hers. 

“Hailey, I’m here for you. No matter what.” Jay used the hand still gripping her shoulder to pull her into another hug. He rested his chin on the top of her head, wanting to press a kiss against her forehead but not wanting to cross that line. Instead he simply held her, soaking in her warmth and hoping she was getting some comfort from him.   

[atths--twice]

Ahhh... here we are at another favorite of mine. I apologize in advance, but this one is a bit rough, as you may be able to tell by the gif. However, it is a pain that needs to be  dealt with and discussed. I hope you enjoy it. 

Chapter Seventeen 

Therapeutic Thanksgiving 

Scully has an appointment with Doctor Kosseff and they discuss many things that need to be brought to light. Guidance and care from her Mom also help to ease a broken heart. 

November 2015

To say that Scully enjoyed therapy with Doctor Kosseff would be somewhat misleading. She did like the feeling of the constant pressure inside her abating a bit when she left the office. She did not like the amount of crying she had done, the headaches she had suffered, and the past hurts that were dusted off and re-examined. It hurt so much sometimes, she wanted to leave and never come back.

Since bumping into her at the coffee shop in June, Scully had only seen Doctor Kosseff seven different times. Work got in the way, and while she knew her own self-care was important, she was pulled into cases, and unable to get away. Doctor Kosseff was understanding, and Scully repeatedly expressed her thanks.

Her first session was a train wreck. She broke down and cried for most of the hour. Doctor Kosseff remained silent and let her ramble and cry, her words tumbling over each other, not even sure what she was saying, only remembering the sobs. As Scully took the tissues handed to her, Doctor Kosseff smiled and sighed before nodding at her.

Her next session was better. The conversation was more structured, and Doctor Kosseff insisted Scully call her Karen. Scully looked at her and tried to respond with some coherent explanation of why that seemed wrong, but she was unable to do anything but nod.

“We may not have seen each other in a while, Dana,” Karen said with a smile. “But we go way back, and that counts for something.” She smiled, and again Scully felt tears in her eyes.

The fourth session though, that one was rough. Crying seemed to be a normal occurrence as soon as she sat on the couch in the office, but that day was worse, as if something was infecting her and causing her to behave unlike herself. Choking on her tears she began to cry out her worries for Mulder.

“I know he’s a grown man, and more than capable of caring for himself, but I’m worried about him. Is he sleeping? Taking his medication? He said he’s seeing a therapist and he’s sending emails, but how is he really? I miss him so much,” she whispered wiping at her eyes. “It’s like I’ve lost part of myself.”

Karen handed her the tissues and Scully laughed bitterly, dabbing her eyes and blowing her nose. “I’m an independent woman, I’ve always prided myself on that, but … I need him, and all these years later, it terrifies me,” she said looking at Karen and shaking her head. Karen smiled and waited for her to continue, but no words were forthcoming.

“Does it terrify you because you don’t want to live without him or you’re worried you don’t know how?” Karen asked quietly.

Scully shook her head, wiping at her eyes again. “It isn’t that. I know I can live without him, and no I don’t want to live without him. I want to be with him. But what terrifies me are the lengths I will go to, to do so. Two years I stayed and felt like I was drowning at times, but I stayed because … I love him. I know him and I felt that if I could have just done more, I could have helped. If I had seen it earlier or demanded differently …” She shook her head, tears falling again. She wiped her eyes and blew her nose, taking deep breaths to calm down.

“Dana, I know you feel this is your fault, that you could have stopped it from happening,” Karen said in her soft calm voice. “But could you have done anything? Really done anything? As you say, you know Fox better than anyone. Could you have changed him or done anything to fix the situation at the time?”

Scully stared at her and wanted to say of course she could, she should have done something. This was her fault. She was the one who left. Karen’s eyes had stopped her from speaking and forced her to look down, the openness she saw in them too much for her at that moment.

“Dana, I’d like you to do something for me when you leave here today,” Karen said kindly, writing something on her notepad. “When you leave, I want you to think of the times when you think saying something or fighting with Fox would have changed the outcome of where you are now. I’d like you to do that before our next meeting.”

Scully sat at home that night, writing out all the times she could think of when Mulder had not come to bed, had pushed her past the point of anger, when he had stayed closed up in his office and shut her out. There were many instances, and seeing them there in black and white hurt in a different way than before.

She ticked off each one as she imagined a different outcome, a way it would have changed if she had barged in the office, turned off the WiFi, or demanded he sit down and listen to her. None of those times would have resulted in a change. She knew that, but she had needed to see it laid out before her to understand it completely. She shook her head as she cried, knowing once again that this, being apart, was the only decision that was right, even if it made her heart ache.

She sat back in her chair and closed her eyes. She knew it was not within her ability to change the outcome, but she had taken it upon herself and that was not fair. They were both to blame, as they had not communicated how they felt. God, they were so bad at it sometimes. Both of them held back and yet expected the other to be forthcoming. After so many years together, it would seem they would have this shit figured out, but no. Jesus Christ …

Knowing what the problem was, she felt that going back to see Karen would not help. She needed to talk to Mulder, but right now that was not going to happen. Time was all she needed, she thought with a sigh and a shake of her head.

On the agreed upon appointment time though, she was there, waiting to speak to Karen and working on moving forward. They discussed Mulder again, the outcomes she knew she could not change, and then Karen brought up the medication Scully had prescribed for him. Not until Karen pointed it out to her did Scully consider the extent of the side effects he could have been suffering. The lack of sex drive, or ability to even have sex, had not been something that was in the forefront of thought when she had gotten him the medication.

Again, she left the office not wanting to go back, her embarrassment and anger at herself simmering at the surface. Angry that she had not seen the forest for the trees, focusing on one area and missing the rest. She wanted to help his depression and other aspects were a second thought. She paced around her apartment, wanting to call Mulder, and apologize for her own neglect when it came to his care.

Thinking back to the fact that they had still been having sex, up to a certain point, it meant he must have forgone his medication. Her anger and confusion with him made sense now that she figured he was not remaining steady with taking his pills. She failed him, again. Curling up in bed, she apologized to him repeatedly, wishing he could hear her.

That was a couple of weeks ago and today, the day before Thanksgiving, she was ready to start her eighth session, finally feeling a bit more comfortable.

“Dana,” Karen said, smiling at her as she came into the waiting room, shaking Scully’s hand as she always did before ushering her into the office. “How are you?”

“Fine. I’m good. Work is busy, as I’m sure yours is at this time of year. Everyone seems to have more problems around the holidays,” Scully said with a small laugh. Karen smiled and nodded.

“Yes, it’s usually busy this time of year. Do you have holiday plans?”

“I’m spending it with my mother this year. Actually heading there after our session,” Scully said and Karen nodded with a smile.

“How are other things? Have you spoken to Fox? Or kept to the emails and texts between you?” Karen asked with a glance at Scully.

“Just the emails and texts. Though it’s been further between them at times.”

Karen smiled at her and made some notes before she looked up again. She exhaled and kept eye contact with Scully, gauging her, it seemed. Scully shifted in her seat and took a deep breath. She licked her lips and closed her eyes before looking up at Karen, knowing this was going to hurt.

“I had a dream last night. About William,” she said quietly. Karen nodded, having heard about him before, and Scully closed her eyes again. “We were walking down the street, and I could feel his hand in mine. It was so small, I could feel all the bones as I ran my thumb across the top of his hand. Then it was bigger and he was there but pulled away from me. I tried to reach for him, to grab for his fingers, but I couldn’t find him. I woke up crying, trying to grab for something that wasn’t there.” She opened her eyes, tears welling inside them before they spilled over, and she wiped them away.

“It’s been fourteen years and I know ... I know that he’s ... he has a family, parents who love him and care for him,” Scully said quietly, tears flowing freely from her eyes. “I have to hope he is okay, anyway. My head knows that, but my heart is not always so accommodating. I still can’t help but wonder ... or worry if he has ever remembered me and I wasn’t there. Did he cry for me those first few nights after he left? Did they know he liked to be sung to and rocked a certain way? Was he ... was he happy? I know, as a doctor and as a scientist, that he would have no memories of me, he was too young. But ... what if … what if he woke up not knowing why he was dreaming of someone he didn’t know, but he felt scared and alone?”

She stopped talking and sobbed into her hands, thinking of William, and the weight of him in her arms. She remembered how she would hold him and breathe in his baby smell, the happiness of finally being a mother had been so overwhelming. His rosy cheeks and soft downy head were the most beautiful things she had ever seen.

Letting him go, knowing it was for his protection, was the hardest decision she ever had to make, and she did it alone. Mulder did not even get a chance to weigh in and voice his opinion or the possibility of a different plan. She had agonized, cried, and screamed over the decision she made. It was she who crumbled to the ground when William was taken from her, her heart that shattered when her baby, the only one she would ever have, was given a better chance of survival away from her. It was she and her mother who clung to one another in the days after he was gone. No Mulder to mourn with her, hold her, or simply grab them both and run, never looking back.

Her sobs began to subside, although not by much. She felt the box of tissues being softly placed on her lap and it caused her to cry more. Taking one from the box, she dabbed at her eyes and wiped her face, then took some deep breaths. She still cried, but her loud and aching sobs had seemed to slow. She blew her nose and took more tissues out to again wipe her face. Keeping her head bowed, she simply sat and waited.

“Dana,” Karen said barely above a whisper. “What does Fox say when you discuss these feelings with him?” Scully shook her head, unable to speak. “Do you not discuss William? Or how you felt during that time of your life?”

Taking a shuddering breath, Scully shook her head again. “It ... it’s sort of an unwritten understanding, so to speak. We ... we talk about William in a roundabout way, but rarely directly, if at all. It hurts to talk about it, and I don’t want to cause Mulder that hurt.”

“Fox?” Karen asked, her tone sharper than Scully had ever heard it. She raised her head and looked at her, finding her face serious and somewhat hard. “Why is your worry for him, when you are affected this way?”

“He wasn’t there. It wasn’t his choice and ... and he ... he missed everything. I took that away from him, his chance at fatherhood. If ... if we talk about what we could have done or how it may have been, it would dredge up too much ... and,” Scully said, shaking her head, remembering the times they had gotten close to having the talk and the look on Mulder’s face. The pain she saw, the anguish. She hated seeing him that way, and eventually not discussing it had been easier.

“Dana, sometimes the only way to move forward is to dump out the past and wade through it. Yes, it may most definitely be painful, but leaving it tucked away and hidden ...” Karen shook her head and looked at Scully. “Keep it hidden, and it festers and rots. It becomes a poison inside that strangles you and stunts your growth. Don’t let this continue to be a poison in your life.”

_____________________

Scully left the office a while later, and walked to her car, exhausted and wanting nothing more than to lay down and sleep. She got in and sat down, closing and locking the door before leaning her head against the headrest, closing her eyes, and sighing.

Exhausted, no, it was not the right word to describe how she felt. She felt boneless like her body was a heavy pile of goo, and it would remain that way forever. Everything ached and she thought never leaving the car sounded like a wonderful idea. She leaned forward and put her head on the steering wheel, her eyes still closed.

You can’t stay here, Dana. You need to get moving, she thought. Heaving a huge sigh, she turned on the car and begin the drive to her mother’s house. She was looking forward to staying with her for the holiday weekend. Some time off work, catching up with her mom, and seeing some old friends sounded wonderful. Right now though, she simply wanted to crawl in bed and sleep for the rest of the day.

Pulling into her mother’s driveway, she sat for a few minutes, collecting her strength, waiting for her body to become less goo-like. Taking a breath, she opened the door, took her overnight bag out of the backseat, and walked up to the front door. She used her key and called out to her mother she was there.

“Dana!” her mother said, coming out of the kitchen wearing an apron and wiping her hands on a dishtowel. “You’re early! I was thinking it would be a couple hours more before you got here.” She smiled at her and pulled her in for a tight hug.

“Hey, Mom,” Scully said, returning the hug and holding on longer than usual. Her mother looked her in the eyes as she put a hand to her face.

“Rough session?” her mother asked softly. Scully nodded and sighed. Her mother also sighed and brushed her thumb across Scully’s cheek. “Well, would mixing up ingredients for pies help you at all?” Scully laughed out a sob and nodded. Her mother patted her cheek and turned to head back to the kitchen. Scully set her bag down on the couch and followed her.

For the next couple of hours, they worked together, mixing and baking pies, cutting vegetables for the next day, and setting the table. Spending time with her mother helped her feel better, but she could feel tears threatening to fall at any time. When the last chore was finished, her mother put the kettle on, grabbed mugs and tea bags, and took off her apron.

Once the kettle whistled, and the tea was made, she reached for Scully’s hand, looking at her with her kind eyes. That was all it took for Scully’s tears to begin. She told her mother of the session that day, of her dream and the discussion that had followed. Sure she had cried herself dry, she was surprised by the amount of tears she still had left. Her mother kept her hand on hers and rubbed her arm.

Scully put her head on the table and her mother moved closer to stroke her hair and speak words of comfort. Scully cried and cried, letting her mother’s love and calmness wash over her. When she had no tears left, she sat trying to calm her sobs. Her mother rested her head against her and told her how much she loved her, how proud she was of her, making Scully cry again.

Her mother helped her to her feet and pulled her in for a hug. “Dana, I know how hard this is for you, how hard it was. I remember.” Scully held her tight and cried softly. “You just go ahead and cry, honey.”

They stood there for a few minutes before Scully pulled back and stared at her mother. Her soft hands were on her cheeks, wiping her tears as she had when past heartbreaks had felt so big. Those had been nothing compared to this pain, but the comfort she felt gave her strength.

Her mother gave her a small smile and grasped her hand, pulling her upstairs to the master bedroom. Scully stood by the bed and heard the water running in the tub. She closed her eyes and sat on the bed, waiting for her mother to come as she knew she would.

She felt a brush in her hair and she sighed, more tears slipping out, as her mother softly brushed her hair. Her shoes were slipped off, her sweater slipped over her head leaving her in her camisole, and then she was pulled to her feet. She opened her eyes as she walked to the bathroom and stood in front of the tub.

The scent of lavender bubble bath surrounded her as her mother walked away, allowing her some privacy. She undressed,  and stepped in, sinking into the deep tub, as she took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

She lay in the tub, exhausted and boneless when she heard her mother’s quiet footfall. Without opening her eyes, she heard the water shut off, and then felt her mother come next to her. Her bare feet and legs came on other side of Scully in the tub, as she sat on the ledge behind her.

She began to massage Scully’s head as she hummed quietly. It was not a particular song, but it was comforting. After a few minutes, her mother put her hair up and rubbed her neck and shoulders. Scully felt her sadness lessening with each touch of her mother’s comforting hands.

Scully reached up and grabbed her mother’s hand. “Thank you, Mom,” she whispered. Her mother squeezed her hand and then extricated herself from the tub, kissing the top of Scully’s head before she left.

Opening her eyes a few minutes later, she saw that a towel and washcloth had been placed by the tub. She leaned forward and picked up the washcloth, washing her body, before relaxing for a few more minutes. Stepping out of the tub, she dried off and then wrapped the soft towel around her body.

Walking into her mother’s room, she saw her bag had been brought into the room and left on the bed. She smiled at the love and care her mother had shown as she took out her pajamas and underwear. She dressed and then hung up the towel as her mother came back in the bathroom. She smiled at Scully and motioned to the vanity.

Scully sat down and her mother stepped behind her, taking her hair down. Picking up her brush, she began to brush her hair again.

“That day, that last day,” her mother said quietly, the brush slowly stroking through Scully’s hair. “It was horrible, I will not deny that. My heart broke with yours, Dana. I know what that baby meant to you, to Fox. I know if you could have, you would have kept him with you.” Her mother paused as she took a breath and shook her head. “But I had been there, I saw the danger not only him but you were in with him there. You made the right choice, Dana. You did.”

Scully looked at her mother in the mirror and her eyes were sad, but she smiled at Scully. Her mother nodded and Scully breathed out a deep sigh, looking back down.

“It’s easier to see it clearly when it’s been so many years, I know that, but it was right, Dana,” her mother began to rub her head again, her short fingernails scratching at her scalp. “I ... I had a hard time with it after William and then you were gone. I was depressed and alone and worried ...”

“Mom?” Scully interrupted, her head snapping up and looking at her mother in the mirror. “You never ...”

“I never said ... no,” she said, looking back at Scully once again with her kind sad eyes. “I know what that decision meant to you. I know how hard it was for you to make. At the time it happened, I wasn’t going to add to your heartache. I was there with you to lessen your pain, Dana. Then Fox was on trial and your focus was understandably on his fate. You left, as you should have done, you were where you needed to be, but those of us left behind, we were left to wonder and carry on. Your friends, John and Monica, were there and they helped to pack up your place. Eventually, though, even they were gone.”

Scully sat frozen. Of course she knew that when they left there had been those behind picking up the slack, but her mind and concern had only been on her and Mulder’s safety. She had worried for her mother, hated how she had simply left her, and not had the chance to say goodbye. When every day they had to worry about being seen, possibly recognized, and what would happen if they were, worries for those at home took a backseat. Now, she was learning it had been worse than she thought for her mother.

“Mom,” she began, but her mother interrupted her.

“Dana, I’m not saying this to hurt you, I’m telling you I understand. I understand your pain. I’ve felt it, and it took me down for a little while. It was nothing you did, but the circumstances out of your hands. As much as it hurt and continues to do so, it was the right decision, Dana. I knew it then, but the sadness still swallowed me up as it did you today,” her mother said, looking in the mirror, her hands on Scully’s shoulders. “Let the sadness in, and then let it out. You did what you needed to protect him, you, and everyone around you. He is safe because of a sacrifice you made, a painful choice you made. He is safe, Dana.”

Scully’s eyes filled with tears again and she nodded her head. Her mother wrapped her arms around her and held her close, Scully placed her hands on top of her mother’s and held her to her.

Her mother kissed her cheek and they both let go of one another and smiled. Scully stood up and pulled her mother in for a hug, her mother whispering she loved her. Scully closed her eyes and held her tighter. When she stood back, her mother smiled at her and Scully smiled back, incredibly tired all of a sudden.

“Could ... could I sleep in your bed tonight?” she asked her mother hesitantly. She nodded with a smile and Scully turned to head to the bedroom.

She laid down and pulled the covers close around her, hearing her mother let the water out of the tub, and getting ready for bed. A few minutes later, the lights were turned off, and her mother laid down next to her. Scully reached for her hand and her mother held tight.

“I love you, Mom,” she whispered, as she squeezed her hand and took a deep breath.

“I love you too, Dana. So very much,” her mother whispered back, with a squeeze of her own.

Scully closed her eyes and let her tired body relax, seeking the sleep she so badly needed. Her heart and her mind had been lovingly cared for by her mother. Now she needed to find the same relief for her body. She squeezed her mother’s hand once more before sleep found her, drawing her in to bring her comfort.

[iwillbeinmynest]

Hold On Loosely - Biker!Steve x Reader(f)    Chapter 17

Authors Notes:  If you’d like to be tagged please send me an ask. I keep better track of tags that way.

Word Count: 1.5k

Special Thanks: Here’s to @itsanerdlife for fueling my Biker obsession and being my Beta for this whole thing. To my girl over at @girl-next-door-writes who also beta’ed for me. And an extra shout out to @bettercallsabs for this beautiful graphic. She is amazing and y’all need to check her out!!

Notes/Warnings: (My notes and warnings are for the story as a whole. Some notes and Warnings will not apply to every chapter.) smoking (I do not support smoking. keep your lungs clean y’all.) drinking, (be of age, don’t be stupid) minor violence, backstabbing, attempted murder, anxiety, stress, mentions of death, car accident, trauma, …I think that’s it. let me know if I’ve missed something.

Master List

Y/N sighed as she towel dried her hair. She looked at her red rimmed eyes in the mirror as she ran a brush through it. She sniffled and took a deep breath. She was surprised by Steve’s behavior but she knew she did what had to be done. They had only been together a short while but Y/N was hurt by what had happened that night.

 Being jeered at by the entire club was awful and something she hadn’t been prepared for but it made sense. In a way she was thankful to know that the club had Steve’s back, that he had a family to lean on. 

 She wondered if he hurt as bad as she did right now. Of course, he was with Mandie. That probably hurt the most- the fact that she’d sided with Steve. It wasn’t surprising, but it still hurt. Y/N knew Mandie wasn’t her closest friend- she wasn’t really a friend at all- but she was pretty okay at acting like she was, which made her staying with Steve all the more aggravating.

 Doing her best to shake it off,Y/N headed to the kitchen for some coffee but when she got there chills ran through her and her heart pounded in her chest. 

 A man stood in the shadows at the back door. 

 Y/N grabbed the closest kitchen knife and threw it at the figure. The man cursed and dodged the blade. He lunged for Y/N but she blocked his hand and punched him.

 She didn’t know where she punched him but she didn’t care. The sudden stomping of his boots behind her made her scream and tears welled in her eyes. Y/N ran back down the hallway and tried to make it back to the bedroom where she knew Steve has left a gun in the bedside table.

 She'd just made it to the doorway when a hand wrapped around her mouth and waist, hurling her backwards.

*****

  Steve followed Mandie to the parking lot. His boots crunched in the gravel beneath them. “Hey, wait up!”

 When she turned her blonde curls bounced over her shoulder. “I told you to wait in there for me.” 

 Steve raised his brows. “You don’t tell me what to do.”

 Mandie batted her lashes and leaned into his chest, running a finger across the tattoo on his collar bone. “Of course not, baby. I didn't mean it like that.”

 He grabbed her wrist and pushed her back. “I’m coming with you.”

 “But, baby, it’s better if you don’t know anything. Keeps you clean and all.” she looked up at him with a pout and a grin.

 “I wanna be there when it goes down. And that’s how it's going to be, got it?” He looked at her with a glare that left no room for argument.

 Mandie’s jaw ticked but she took a deep breath and shook off her annoyance. “Then we better hurry. I already made the call and he’s probably at her house already.”

 Steve grabbed her by the arm and jerked her towards his bike. “Get on.” She started to argue when he jerked her harder to the bike. She got on quickly, catching the helmet he threw at her. He rode his bike so fast, he cut the travel time down by ten minutes.

 When he pulled into Y/N’s driveway Mandie all but jumped off the bike.

  “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to get to her before my guy did.” Mandie threw the helmet back to him. 

 He caught it with a growl. “You wanna be my old lady, right?”

 She was caught off guard by that. “Well, yeah.”

 “Then you’d better stop questioning me.” He loomed over her and took a breath to keep talking when a scream came from inside the house followed by a crash.

 Steve pushed past Mandie and bolted for the front door. When that was locked, he jumped over the front porch railing and kicked down the fence gate get into the backyard. He ran up the back steps and went in through the kitchen door.

 A quick glance around and he noticed the missing knives and the one stuck in the wall beside him. He cursed to himself and reached into his waistband for his gun.  Another crash and a grunt had Steve’s heart about to tear out of his chest. It came from Y/N’s bedroom so he hurried through the house.

  A gunshot made Steve jump. “Y/N!” He shouted. He rounded the corner and ran down the hallway to her room. When he made it to the doorway he saw a man on top of her with his fist high, about to strike. 

 Steve charged and tackled the guy. They both tumbled and Steve’s gun flew from his grasp. With the house being so dark, Steve couldn’t get a look at the guy he was fighting. He finally managed to get on top of him and wailed on him until he stopped struggling.

 Nat flicked the lights on, as she tried to catch her breath. She cursed and hunched over, clutching her stomach. 

 Steve grabbed his gun and kept it pointed at the man he now recognized as Peter Quill. He swore and put a hand on Nat’s shoulder. “You okay?”

 She nodded. “I think he broke a rib but, yeah. I’m fine.”

 Steve ran a hand over his face. He tried to slow his breathing but the adrenaline was still flowing strong.

 Mandie ran into the room. “Steve! Are you okay?!”

 Steve turned his gun on her. “Don’t move.” he snarled.

 She threw her hands up. “What are you doing?”

 “I swear, if you move, I will shoot you.”

 “I don’t understand, baby.” Her eyes started to water.

 “You actually think Steve would be with a psycho like you?” Nat chuckled. She winced at the pain laughing caused her.

 Just then, Bucky and Sam walked up behind Mandie. Sam grabbed both of her shoulders.

 “What are you doing? Let go of me!” She struggled against him.

 “Civilian’s arrest.” He clicked the handcuffs on her. “This is just to keep you still until your ride gets here.”

 “My ride? What the- Steve! Tell him to let me go.”

  “Not a chance. Consider us officially parting ways and believe me when I say I hope I never see you again.” He turned to Bucky. “Quill is in here, just like you figured. Where is she?”

 Bucky patted Steve’s cheek. “Good work, Punk. I don’t know how you did it,” He looked back at Mandie with disgust. “I sure wouldn’t have been able to.”

  Steve smirked. “You better check on your girl she took a nasty hit for mine.” 

 Bucky kneeled down and held Nat's face for a second before he kissed her forehead. He stood back to Steve. "She's with Frank. They were about 5 minutes behind me and the boys. Our new friends are riding with 'em."

 Steve heard the rumbling of a bike pulling in and nodded to Bucky. He clasped his hand on Bucky’s shoulder, right over is 'President' patch. "Thanks, Buck."

 Bucky jerked his head towards the front door. "Go take care of your old lady."

 As Steve passed Sam in the hall, he punched him in the arm.

 Sam stumbled back a bit. "What was that for?!"

 Steve raised his brows. "I heard what you called my girl when she left the bar tonight."

 Sam's eyes widened. "I- I was just playin' along, man. I didn't mean it, I swear."

 Steve nodded but still wasn't happy about it. He glanced at Mandie before shaking his head. "Bring her."

******

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[girlafraidinacoma]

In The Lap of the Gods: Chapter Six - Fanta-seas and Denial

Summary: What do you get when you mix a tight-knit art community, young, hot-blooded twenty-something university students and good old-fashioned British Rock & Roll? Probably the next best hope for art and music that generation has to offer. With her friends’ band skyrocketing to fame, what exactly does a girl do when she suddenly finds herself sitting in the lap of the gods? The answer: do the only thing she can do, rise to the occasion of course!

Pairing: Gwilym Lee!Brian May x Original Female Character

Author’s Note: Sorry, not sorry for the incredibly late update dudes. Was super uninspired for months, had a break down, got over it, bon appetit.

( gif credit goes to @queenmercurys.)

Kind of AU, contains both elements from real life and the Bo Rhap universe, so imagine whoever you prefer whether they be the real thing or the Bo Rhap Boys–be free.

[Link to Ao3 fic!]

Chapter Playlist:

Both Sides Now - Joni Mitchell

Astral Weeks - Van Morrison

Chapter Six - Fanta-seas and Denial

Ealing, December 1969.

“You’re incorrigible. I’ll never finish at this rate!” Wyn cried, throwing her arms up.

“Nobody told you to leave it until the last minute to work on your project.” He grumbled. It seemed like only yesterday that she began her first day at the Ealing Technical College and School of Art, but December had finally crept in, summoning the looming toll of due dates and unfinished critical projects.

“I honestly didn’t mean to forget, I thought I’d still have a week, not three bloody days.” Wyn whimpered a little pathetically, feeling the mounting panic bubble inside at the thought of not submitting her work on time. Currently, they were seated on the floor at the centre of Wyn’s dorm room, the space her easel usually occupied, cutting out various images and words out of several dozen stacks of magazines, newspapers, catalogues and a charitable helping of Woman’s Weekly – courtesy of Jer Bulsara.

Wyn’s dorm was a site Freddie had quickly grown accustomed to during their past few months of friendship. He liked her place. Sure, there were several others that lived on her floor and there’s only the bare modicum of privacy, but it was a decently sized space for a dorm, generous even, were it not cramped with half-finished canvases and art materials at various stages of use. Despite this fact, Wyn had tried her very best to make it up as nice as she could without having to open a Better Homes magazine. It was a place of barely organized but brightly coloured chaos.

The room itself was divided into two halves, one half where she slept and lounged, and the other half reserved for her work. The narrow bed which she slept in had been pushed up flush against the far corner of the room for the spatial economy. There was an olive-green loveseat with faded upholstery situated opposite the bed, and next to it was her bookshelf (definitely someone’s previously discarded woodworking project), keeping her collection of vinyls, novels and art journals. The side of Wyn’s room that served as her work area had a very large window that provided her place with natural light from about six or seven in the morning to four in the afternoon. Beside the window was a small desk, perpetually cluttered with paper, and a heavy wooden trunk packed to the brim with art supplies. One would think she’d been living there forever with all the stuff she’d accumulated in the past four months; the result of which was an assemblage of mismatched furniture that on its own were rather forgettable or borderline hideous, but somehow miraculously worked together, grudgingly made ‘cool’ by the person inhabiting it.

“Now who’s incorrigible?” As much as Freddie teased, it only took about five minutes of begging and a promise to cover one of his shifts at the Kensington stall for Freddie to generously acquiesce his time to help her out with one of her class assessments, to her supreme relief.

“Besides, they only want proof of concept. The whole thing’s not due until the end of Christmas hols.” Wyn said, flipping to the next page.

“Sure, sure.” The man rolled his eyes, waving a large pair of shears around. “What’s the focus for this piece anyway?”

“Oh, you know, just a bit of social commentary about defining identity through materialism and the like.” She told him, picking up a scrap he’d just finished cutting out, “These little bits here, will eventually be put together and build up a face or whatever, then I think I’d slather some paint on it, use some charcoal and call it a day, probably.”

“Is it still Granger and Warton assessing?”

“Warton is on leave, taking the airs in Bournemouth. Connelly is subbing in.”

“Even better, Connelly likes anything that’s remotely opinionated. He’ll be eating this all up with his Sunday roast.” He laughed. It gave her that smidge more comfort to hear his approval and she told him just as much.

She and Freddie were both dutifully attending to their work when out of the blue, Freddie sniffs the air, saying: “Have I told you how much your room smells?”

“Oops,” The girl said sheepishly, “Sorry. Let me just open a window. Afraid I’ve gotten quite used to it.” Briefly, she pattered away from him to do just that, lighting a rosemary and orange-scented candle, a gift from an aunt who had taken up chandlery upon retirement.

“Yes, the smell of varnish does tend to make the uninitiated rather queasy.” He nodded. “Lucky for you, I know the smell intimately. Unlucky for you, it still makes me queasy. Unless… you’ve become a junkie, in which case there are better highs than paint fumes, my dear.” A hand rose to Freddie’s chest, playfully aghast.

Wyn shook her head with a laugh. “I don’t even realise sometimes, too stuck in my work.”

“Still, you should always remember to take care of yourself. What good is your art if you’re not there to appreciate it? I’d rather have you, than a painting.”

Wyn dropped the page she was holding and looked at him. “Always so sweet. Where would I be without you, my dearest Freddie?”

“Probably still glued to a wall in that function room with the horrible punch.” Fred snarked, letting out an inelegant snort in the magazine his face was buried in.

So far, they were amassing a pretty sizeable pile of clippings and Wyn wordlessly congratulated herself and Freddie for making progress, but the good feeling didn’t last long. The two had been quiet for a while, with only the sound of snipping and paper tearing to fill the silence when reluctantly Fred releases the lip he had been gnawing on for a solid two minutes and clears his throat. “I’ve got something to tell you,” He says, putting down the pair of scissors he was using. “Actually, I could use your opinion.”

Still focused on an area she was clipping, Wyn nodded. “Spill, it’s not like we’re going anywhere soon.”

He exhaled deeply and gave what could be likened to a formal announcement. “I’m thinking of seeing Mary. Scratch that, I’ve seen Mary and had a cup of coffee with her, and I’ve been thinking about doing that more.”

There was sudden a hush that came about the room and settled in like a third guest. It took her several moments to process and Wyn gently reminded herself to lower her pair of scissors, lest she accidentally hurt a friend. “Wait, Mary, as in 'the coat's BIBA', Mary? As in Brian’s Mary? That Mary?” She gauged him with a puzzled look.

“As in Brian’s ex-girlfriend, Mary Austin, Yes.” Freddie confirmed, not blinking.

“So, you want to go see Brian’s ex, that is what you’re saying?”

“Ex, being the operative word, but yes.”

“You don’t think that’ll put a wrench into things?” She asked with a furrowed brow. “Smile hasn’t even begun performing again yet with you as the lead. Do you understand where I’m coming from, how precarious your situation is?”

“I don’t know,” It was his turn to shrug, eyes large and expressive. “I think she’s sweet and gorgeous and she doesn’t mind my teeth. Wait, where did you hear about Brian and Mary anyway?”

Wyn shrugged, “Roger told me.”

“That gossiping cow.” Freddie scowled.

“Well, no, we were just talking and the subject came up,” Wyn said levelly, grabbing a new catalogue from the stack.

“Oh, it came up naturally, did it?” He asked, picking up his scissors and cutting the page he was on a tad aggressively. “Not that you were asking after a certain boy with a guitar, needling poor Roger until he revealed whether said boy was single or not?”

“No,” She denies, “Roger and I were just talking about that night at the bar, and he just happened to mention that until recently Brian had been seeing Mary and hinted that maybe Brian was still interested in seeing her.”

Freddie had narrowed his eyes. “And Roger told you that, did he? Are you sure this isn’t about you and Roger?”

Her head quirked. “Why would this be about me and Roger?”

Freddie laughed. “Maybe because Roger thinks you’re fit and he’s trying to eliminate the competition by hinting that one of his friends might be keen to reconnect with an ex so that you won’t consider that friend as a potential romantic partner?”

“Or, you’re spinning this intricate web because you’re in denial that Mary wants to be with Brian and continuing to see her might ruin your chances with the band?” She offered sweetly.

“Or, this is about you and Roger.” Wyn had to roll her eyes at that.

“This is so not about Roger.”

“Brian, then.”

“It’s not like that.” She shakes her head, eyes trailing to the ground.

Freddie was not convinced, “I saw you and Brian looking cozy together. In that booth, on the way home, going for a little shopping trip…”

“We went shopping to feed you!”

“It’s probably what set off Rog in the first place.” He said in sing-song.

“N-no, the man doesn’t even flirt with me--” She was growing exasperated quickly.

“So, you admit that you flirt with Roger all the time.” Freddie was a dog with a bone.

“That’s just the way we talk to each other! He just thinks it’s a bit of fun, and I’m not about to let him think he can get a rise out of me.” Freddie could have sworn her voice rose an octave.

"I think you have a crush on him."

"I do not have a crush on Brian."

"Who said anything about Brian?" Freddie cracked a devilish grin at having caught her out. He batted his eyes at her.

The girl, on the other hand, was at a loss for words, opening her mouth and closing it again a couple of times, before scoffing. “Oh, shut up. You haven’t proven anything. Go see Mary then if you’ve already made up your mind.” She resigned, covering her discomfort with a laugh. Wyn looked down and busied herself by neatening the growing pile of magazine and newspaper trimmings she was collecting, forcing her hair to fall and obscuring her face. She absolutely was not going to let her friend see the burning flush she was newly sporting.

Fred chuckled beside her, examining his manicured hand. "I honestly wonder what fantasy world you're living in, darling. You're so caught up in it."

Instead of answering him directly she chose to switch to diversionary tactics. "You say that like it's a bad thing, or like you're not right there with me. You're just as mad as me." She poked his cheek.

"True, darling." He conceded, "I definitely see the appeal; I mean who wouldn’t want to escape this old tedious business for one in a fantasy book?” Freddie sighed dreamily, “I say, human ingenuity peaked when we learned we could just imagine ourselves far away from here.”

The girl hummed, gladdened to finally be talking about something else again. “Where everything is weird and wonderful, and you finally belong…”

“You can be anyone you want to be.”

“And bugger the rules because there are none.” She supplied without missing a beat.

“Get out of my head, Wyn Clemens.” He chided her. “You know, this reminds me of when Kashmira and I used to spend all our time in the afternoons together lying on a dusty floor, making up crazy stories.”

A fond smile came over Wyn’s face. “Oh? What about?”

“Well, tis a tale of a long and arduous quest to save the magical Kingdom of Rhye,” He said indulgently, “Your usual fight between the forces of good and evil, brave knights, lavish castles, rival queens, and a sprinkling of anthropomorphic animals.”

“Ah, but of course! I wouldn’t expect anything less.” She leaned back and drew her legs under her chin. “Pray tell then, merry minstrel, regale me with the story of Rhye.”

Freddie sat a little more upright in his spot, his teeth showing in a big smile. “Alright, so, it all began when the White Queen was abducted from her castle. Now in hopes to rescue her, her brother, the handsome Prince, scours all the land gathering knights…”

Wyn had already forgotten they had been arguing not two minutes ago. It was like that with her and Freddie, they never could stay cross with one another for long, always managing to read what the other was thinking. It was shocking how close the two had gotten in such a short span of time. Suddenly the prospect of Freddie graduating brought a sinking feeling to Wyn’s chest. She silently hoped he’d still have time for her, or would deign to remain her friend. The future always seemed so unsteady. Standing on its precipice, Wyn supposed that if she’d have to drink some horrible punch at some mediocre party, she’d rather be suffering through it with him than without him.

[fivegoldpieces]

okay let’s get this late liveblog post started

marisha and travis wearing those glasses while sitting right next to each other is honestly killing me right now please im so weak

what is this ad oh my god 

SAD SANDPAPER

how the hell do they have time to do this im

LAURA BURSTING OUT LAUGHING AND MATT’S PERPLEXED FACE IS ME EVERY WEEK

HAPPY PRIDE HELL YEAH HELL YEAH

JESTER DISGUISING HERSELF AS A LEAF I LOVE HER SO GD MUCH

LEAF COSTUME IM LOSING MY MIND

rotting meat fjord, i don’t know how much that will help but okay

“can i like swim back to the tree” MARISHA THAT’S WHAT YOU SAID LAST CAMPAIGN TOO AND IT DIDN’T WORK

JESTER COULD HAVE GONE INVISIBLE IM FUCKNSKFL CRYING

Beau: “Everyone is fucking bailing on me, and I ain’t got shit” 

Jester: “I’m a leaf! I’m a leaf but I’m still with you”

THE WAY IM FUCKING HOLLERING RIGHT NOW OH MY GODDD I LOVE. THEM!

MARISHA MIMING BEAU REACHING OUT TO JESTER IM AJLKDJALSJFSADF

beaujester held hands i am perFecTLY FINE this is FINE IM FINE this is okay im good im good imajfdklasjdfasjkfk HANDS

Fjord is a bottom Confirmed

DIMENSION DOOR IS BEAUJESTER SHIPPERS FRIEND

UGH THAT POLYMORPH COULDVE BEEN SO GOOD

FJORD RIDING THE ROC LIKE VM DID I THINK

YES JESTER POLYMORPH BUT ALSO OH NO FJORD

the image of 6ft caduceus holding onto an eagle is fuckn amazing

i have to say the sound of matt shaking the dice as fjord falls sounds ominous as fuck

YAY FJORD IS STILL ALIVE

caduceus talking to fjord on the ground reminds me of the skyrim scene for some reason

can beau saying “i follow jester” be a thing

jester saying sorry to fjord 😭

KEEP THE BAT AWAY DON’T TOUCH IT JUST PUT IT IN THE BAG OF HOLDING

beau and caleb going to the nest to get loot together hell yeah

AWW BABY ROC

BEAU TRYING TO SCRITCH THE BABY ROC LMFAOO

THE BALL BEARINGS RETURN LMFAO

oh damn that’s a lot of gold in a nest

beau getting the silk clothes for jester

“c’mon man get back in the cloak”

beau arguing with caleb as an eagle fucking sends

LMFAO LAURA HIT THE MIC

OH SHIT POLYMORPH DROPPED

omg bless that one spell slot

damn jester really loves using command

this tense atmosphere with the roc omfg

HUT COMPLETED

 im not saying beau is married to jester now because of the rings but she definitely is

LMAO THE BOX IS TRAPPED THE ONE TIME NOTT DOESN’T CHECK FOR TRAPS

FIREBALL TRAP NOTT WHAT THE FUCK

nott is drunk i can tell

omg jester trying to snatch the flask and putting it into the haversack

beau proposed to yasha with that ring omg rights for beauyasha shippers

IM SORRY BUT MARISHA ACCIDENTALLY FUCKING WITH LIAM’S INJURED SHOULDER AS BEAU SENDS

LMFAO JESTER TRYING TO WINGMAN

omg beau and yasha are married ugh wlw rights

AH FUCK ORCS

HELL YEAH FIREBALL

i wonder how fjord feels about the orcs they’re fighting

FUCKING HELLO BEES GOD I LOVE JESTER

marisha really works those sunglasses ugh someone draw beau in them

their true rivals are toya and the roc

awww poor jester is exhausted

LET’S GO BAZOZZAN

i don’t trust that tower at all

o fuck it’s a xhorhasian hupperdook but without the fun civilians

persuasion checks scare the crap out of me ngl

“be quiet, do your work, and leave” honestly applies to a lot of places

beau, to jester: “you were pretty awesome actually”

me: fucking dead on the ground because of these two blue gfs

omg pls the leaf costume

things escape from the tower? a prison?

oh fuck temples to betrayer gods

DOORWAYS TO THE ABYSS??

this is some grey warden darkspawn shit omg

THE FUCKING DANCE MOVES

JESTER SMART TIEF LOVE HER

oh fuck THE ABYSS?? DEMONS

OH HELL OH HOW FUN

marion read jester a book about demons as a child lmfao

oh god what’s jester gonna do to that sign

bless on beau and fjord and jester ugh i love my og trio crumbs

ARE YOU STILL IN YOUR LEAF COSTUME

the traveler’s voice being described as disembodied honestly creeps me out

oban wan kenobi

omfg what is up with that incense lmao

oh the joys of haggling i cant do that lol

HOW MUCH MONEY DOES CAD HAVE

SHARE BEDS PLEASE

FLASK IS GONE AND NOTT IS FREAKING

omg not at nott thinking yasha did it

ok but nott and her alcoholism is gonna be the new spice

nott possibly fusing with frumpkin sends

i love cats ah

FJORD OPENING UP LET’S GO LET’S GO

let fjord and caduceus be goddess buddies

praying to the wildmother is literally a way to deal with anxiety attacks

fjord’s fixation on the fact that the dream with the wildmother felt good says a lot

SHUT UP HE’S ANXIOUS TO FEEL THAT GOOD AGAIN IM GONNA FUCKING SOB

mountain with no snow in front of a salt flat? oh my

god i fuckn love fjord and caduceus talking

it’s the fuckn ocean im gonna fucking cry im 

HE GOES TO SLEEP VERY WELL THAT NIGHT IM LITERALLY GONNA SOB

omg let’s go three wlws bc bi/closeted lesbian jester is Real and no one can take that away from me

jester trying to wingman so hard lmfao

LMFAO YASHA STANDING OVER THEM

WAKEY

THE SCRY FAILED UGH

jester saying “that’s what i’m here for” rings a bell in my mind but i don’t know what exactly - something about her view of her worth in the group which would be interesting to explore

omg nott about to confront yasha

and fjord now oh and caduceus

TRAVIS JUST ENDED SAM’S CAREER HOLY FUCK

oh boy cold turkey is not gonna be fun

ANGRY YASHA OMFG

omg m9 please don’t enable the alcoholism

45 GOLD FOR FIRE WHISKEY OMG

maybe use that bottle to wean her off 

everyone calls jester jessie now ugh thank you nott for starting it and beau for always using it

god i love brjeaus so much

SECRET TUNNELLLLL SECRET TUNNELLLLLL THROUGH THE MOUNTAINSSSSSS

lmfao fjord tryna be buff

oh god what is this sending gonna sound like

WHAT IF I JUST GO DDU DU DDU DU DDU DDU DDU

IM FUKVMKSNF LLOSING IT NO SHE DID IT IMF FJA

how is she supposed to look for the hidden entrance if it’s hidden

oh god they’re gonna go down the tunnel aren’t they

the way travis and marisha burst into song fuckn nerds

no plans we die like adventurers

YASHA HONEY YOU ARE NOT A FREAK

i can be a freak i can i can be a freak every day of every week

o fuck yea goggles are cool

SHE’S UNDERAGE LMFAOO

holy fuck 25 gold BUT HE DOES IT ANYWAY

fjord just one black coffee-ed nott lmfao

huh nothing for locate creature but locate object worked

FUCK YEAH CELESTIAL BUDS

uh “until the world ends”?? that does not sound good 

FJORD JUST GOES IN DUDE

oban is floating i know

JESTER HOLDING YASHA’S HANDS

SHFSFIA THE FUKD FK AF JESTER TELLING YASHA THE M9 IS BEHIND HER AND WILL SUPPORT HER

WE CAN BE YOUR NEW ONE

WE CAN BE YOUR NEW ONE

WE CAN BE YOUR NEW ONE

hol on i  need several moments

WE LOVE YOU VERY MUCH YASHA NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS

FUCKJFKSJFDAKJDF MY FUCKNS TEARS

oh? an idea?

ROCK HARP LMFAO

the way yasha prays to the stormlord is kind of endearing in a way to me

ashley is so nervous omg like travis was

TWO MILES???? THAT’S SO MUCH WALKING

this tunnel mad creepy i don’t like this

okay but i wonder if that tunnel collapsed because of someone 

beau and jester keeping track of the wall ugh my crumb

MM I DON’T TRUST OBELISKS

OOOH SYMBOLS ON PAPER

omfg fjord you can’t just eldritch blast in a tunnel that’s had a cave in before just shake him

oh it’s abyssal? defaced by celestial creatures?

UH UH THAT SOUNDS FOREBODING

god they’re such musical nerds

oh boy they’re sending nott in i hope she doesn’t get hurt

angel sculptures?

UM WEEPING ANGELS NO THANKS

THEY’RE CRYING BLOOD? NOPE GET OUT GET OUT

NOTT NO OMFG

ugh cats should have darkvisio

oh my god this is so creepy it’s like 4am matthew please

BROKEN SWORD??

THEY’RE GOING IN FUCK

LMFAO NOTT SEARCHING YASHA’S POCKETS

this place is so gd creepy matt please end it oh my god

the music is not helping at all

TWO DAYS OLD?? UH NOPE NOPE NOPE

THIS SOME SACRIFICIAL SHIT

NUH UH THIS IS REMINDING ME OF THE WHITESTONE ARC AND ZIGGURATS FUCK THIS OMFG

DON’T FUCKING PULL THE SKELETON FJORD JFC

oh god the fact that the statues were sitting is even creepier

i really don’t like this omg it’s so creepy

DOES NO ONE HAVE DETECT GOOD AND EVIL

AH FUCK THE STATUES ARE MAGICAL TOO

oh god she touched it

oh god they both touched it

oh i really do not like this omfg

what if someone dragged a body in oh god this is terrifying

IT’S MUSIC

WAIT DOESN’T CELESTIAL SOUND LIKE SINGING

METAL HARP LMFAO

break one open lol

UH SHE’S STANDING IN FRONT OF THE DOOR H

oh geez they really are gonna go in

earthy rotten sulfuric smell does not sound good at all

“you guys know what to do” oh boy

oh three yashas are a dream

WELL HELL LMFAO

closing it off with yasha as annie amazing

UGH CAN’T WAIT FOR NEXT WEEK

[mamabearlarusso]

Journal: Mission Accomplished!

As the guys work on bringing in a mostly sleeping Johnny from the car, I go up ahead and open the apartment door. It's dark and quiet inside, but I can still hear voices ringing from my previous times here.

"He’s not going to hurt anyone, anymore…I did it…I killed him!!"

"Throw one fucking cherry bomb and they’re all over you!"

"THIS IS THE LAPD…OPEN THE DOOR!!"

"Diaz… Watch OUT!!! He’s RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!"

"…he recently wrapped his car around a building…it’s a miracle he walked away in one piece…let alone walked away at all."

"GOD DAMN IT, Johnny! Just use your damn words and shit won't happen."

"Johnny?"

Though, I don't have time for all of that drama right now. All that matters right now is that I finally brought him home. No hospitals...no driving for hours...and no screaming and hitting and fainting in bars. I turn around, letting the guys in. Johnny mumbles about coffee and the guys staying, but trails off as he makes his half-swaying, half-stumbling way into the bedroom without looking back.

I thank the guys for helping me--even promising to buy the first round next time--and close and lock the door. Walking into the back room, I see that Johnny's already sprawled across the bed, half asleep. As I start taking off his boots, he tries to look around, but the angle is off. Then he pushes to roll himself over...*his foot falls out of my hands and I have to pick it back up*...and squints like he can't figure out what or who I am. (I guess I should get used to that look? Don't go there, this isn't as bad as last time. Is it wrong that I'm glad he's just drunk off his ass, even though he only gets this drunk when something gets screwed up?) *in a hushed tone* "Hey!" *smiles and unties the next boot* "It's still me, Rattles."

His eyes lighten up and smiles. 'Hey, Bats'

*pulls off boot and drops it on the floor with a smirk* "Wanna help me get you into bed properly? Gonna need to get those pants off first." He smirks lazily. *takes his hands in mine and helps him sit up and then stand up* (Warm skin...shut up.)

*He wobbles and sways, wraps his arms around my neck and rests his head on mine--just trying not to fall* (More warm skin...shut up) *I start undoing his belt*

*He sighs* "'m sorry, babe...no' how i'was suppose t'be...waited so long...no' how I wann'ed...' *looks up to see tears in his eyes*

*pants drop to the floor with a metallic thud* "Shh...it's okay. You're here and you're safe. That's all that matters, right now." He starts lightly kissing my face. "Come on, time to get back on the bed." Before I know what's happening, he's falling backwards and taking me with him...his legs got tangled with his pants down at his ankles. *looks back up to see a faint smile on his face* (If I didn't know better...) *lifts his arms from around my neck and sits up, picks up one of his calves after the other to release the jeans. (Even more warm skin...shut up.)

He starts rubbing my back. "Ya g'nna come back'ere wi'h me?"

*looks around and clears off the bed, sees that he brought my shirt in with him, drapes it over the bed post* "You want me, you gotta get your head over on the that pillow."

His eyes are closed as he groans, and drags himself over. "R'lly pl'yin' h'r' ta ge', Ba's."

*helps him pull his legs up onto the bed and grabs the sheet to cover him* "There you go."

"Jus' wanna hol' ya...'ven 'f jus' a 'ream..."

(Okay, that's it.) *kicks off shoes, unzips my jeans, slips them off and climbs in next to him...rests my hand on his chest, kisses his cheek and whispers in his ear* "I'm right here, Rattles." *feels his arm pull me in and sees a tear leaking out*

"Jus' luv 'im s'much."

*whispers* "Shh...I know, he loves you, too. Now go to sleep." *rests my head in the crook of his arm, closes eyes, slowly brushes fingers across his chest*

"r'lly m'ss'ou, 'man'a, wis'ou 'ere 'ere."

I think I might have fallen sleep after that, because the last thing I remember...tears were silently falling down my face and on his shirt. Wiping the sleep from my eyes, I see that it's still dark out. No more than a few hours must have passed. *carefully and quietly rolls out of bed, grabs my jeans, my shoes and stops when I grab my shirt from the bed post. *smells shirt and smiles, lies it on the pillow next to Johnny, then walks out*

Not even finishing half a plate of fries wasn't gonna be enough to stop him from getting a hangover. *places my stuff on the dining room chair, walks into the kitchen and looks in the fridge for something he could eat* (Well...it looks better than I thought it would.) Lots of good staples, even some apples, half bag of grapes and OJ...maybe Robby or Bobby went shopping while they were staying here. (Hey, there's that hummus I remember him talking about awhile back.) *Grabs a few things and gets to work*

Twenty minutes later, I put the note up on the fridge.

Rattles,

No. It wasn't a dream...I was here, but I had to get back to the kids. I know you know the drill by now, but I made you some egg salad in the fridge...in the bowl with the plate on top...bread's on the counter...drink plenty of water.

See you soon,

Bats

All dressed up again, keys in hand, I turn at the door for one last look. *inhales deeply* The voices from before aren't there...at least not now. *sighs* (He's back.) *turns the lock on the knob and walks out*

[tenroseforeverandever]

Dear Father Christmas... Chapter 10: December 24, 2025

MASTERPOST

Characters:  Tentoo; Rose Tyler; Jackie Tyler; Pete Tyler; Tony Tyler; OC Hope Tyler-Noble; OC Charlotte Tyler-Noble; OC Wilfred Tyler-Noble

Rated: Teen

Tags: Family!Fic; Kid!Fic; Pete’s World; Letters to Santa; Christmas Fic; Family; Fluff; Hurt/Comfort; Angst; Romance; Love; gun violence; violence resulting in death; life-threatening injury; life threatening situations

Summary: When Rose Tyler was little, she always wrote a Christmas wish list to Father Christmas. As she grew older, the wish list became more of a letter to someone she could confide in once a year, but she fell out of the habit somewhere along the way. Now, as a new mum, celebrating her daughter’s first Christmas, Rose takes up writing her Christmas letter to Father Christmas once again.

Rose’s Christmas letters are excerpts from her life with her beloved Tentoo and their children in Pete’s World, written once a year, for each of 31 years.

Chapter Summary: For Rose Tyler, Defender of the Earth, there’s nothing quite like the adventure of saving the world, until one Christmas, the adventure becomes far too dangerous and puts Rose’s life in jeopardy. 

Notes: Trigger warning for serious, life-threatening situations, violence, life-threatening injury, and violence resulting in death.

My darling betas, @rose–nebula and mrsbertucci. How can I possibly thank you enough? I appreciate all that you do. You are wonderful!

Thanks to @doctorroseprompts for their 31 Days of Ficmas prompts. A reminder that I am using the prompts very much out of order, but I intend to use them all. The prompt I used today was Family.

Also read at: AO3; FF.net; Teaspoon

December 24th, 2025

Dear Father Christmas,

Rose Tyler, Defender of the Earth. That’s me! (Somehow it always sounds grander when the Doctor says it, though.)

It’s been so brilliant this past year to get back out in the field and feel like I’m making a difference. There’s nothing quite like that feeling of saving the world. Yeah, the Doctor and I have our TARDIS, and we go travelling all around the universe on the weekends, visiting all sorts of places and times with Hope, Charlie, and Wilfred. But it isn’t quite like it used to be when it was just the Doctor and me, yeah, living by the seats of our pants, leaping from one adventure to the next.

Don’t get me wrong. It’s still an adventure! Especially getting to watch the brood learn about all of space and time. When the time comes, the TARDIS will be theirs to inherit, and they need to be armed with all the knowledge they can possibly cram into those bigger-on-the-inside brains of theirs. It’s just… I know it sounds mental, but I miss the danger; the adrenaline rush; that thrill that comes of well… saving the Universe and barely escaping with your own life.

It’s strange really, because, of the two of us, you’d think it would be the Doctor who was missing experiencing that high. But it turns out he’s really enjoying tinkering and experimenting at Torchwood for the time being, and he’s so involved with the kids’ educations. Sometimes he comes on missions with me (those are the best missions, running with his hand in mine!) and the kids stay with their Gran and Grandad, but he’s mostly content to do the school run and go to work at Torchwood, these days.

I think a big part of it is him wanting to make sure that at least one of us is safe at all times. I get that. This spring, a laser from a skittish, crash-landed Jumjumut grazed my left shoulder as I was diving for cover. It hit very close to my heart. We actually lost one of our operatives on that mission, before we had a chance to subdue the alien. Isabel Stokes was a good woman, single mum of two. Fortunately, her parents were able to step in and look after her babies, but it really struck home: my job can sometimes be very dangerous.

The Doctor held onto me really tight when I got home the next night. He made love to me like he was etching the memories in his mind. Maybe he was. He never asked me not to return to work though, but in the morning, he passed me my travel mug of coffee and told me he loved me. Then he told me to come home safe. What could I say to that? I just kissed him and whispered in his ear, “I’m never going to leave you.”

That’s become our morning ritual since that day.

On my birthday, this year, he gifted me with my very own sonic. A gorgeous sonic wristwatch, programmed with all the settings of his screwdriver. He said it would make him feel better knowing I had it at my disposal, because you never know… I guess if he couldn’t be there himself, a sonic he had crafted was the next best thing.

Life’s been busy. Most of the missions weren’t dangerous at all. They weren’t even proper missions at all. A lot of the time, I was just checking in with pensioners who thought they’d seen a UFO. We had to follow up, of course, because you never know. Usually, though, it was the things hidden in plain view we had to watch out for. Tracking those babies down sometime took days. There were times when I had to miss some of our excursions on the TARDIS, which broke my heart, but the Doctor managed on his own with the brood.

But I had never yet missed an important occasion: I had made it home for birthdays anniversaries, concerts, recitals, holidays, the whole bit. I even booked a month off to spend summer hols winging through space and time with the loves of my life.

But here I am, Christmas Eve, stuck on a stakeout in Cape Town waiting for some well-known alien arms smugglers, the Dintashi, to try to make a deal with a rebel group of Sontarans who have been hiding out on Earth for the last month. They’d thought Earth was a dead-end planet with limited knowledge of extraterrestrial life, and for the most part, they were right. They liked it for its extensive communications networks, though: easy to tap into. Also, easy for us to trace once we figured out what we were looking for. They’d underestimated Torchwood and we’ve been watching, waiting for this deal to go down.

Unfortunately, I drew the short straw for the week over the Christmas period. I’m scheduled to be here five more days, which means, if I’m very lucky, I’ll be home in time to ring in the New Year at the Annual Vitex New Year’s Gala.

I have to tell you Santa, stakeouts are mind-numbingly dull. We know something is going to happen soon. It’s just coordinating terrestrial and extraterrestrial calendars can be a bit dodgy sometimes so, a lot of the time we have to wait, and play it by ear.

Me and my partner, Arjun Sreeram have worked together on loads of cases. We train together, so we know each other pretty well. We’re camped out in a vacant flat across the street from the Sontarans’ building. He’s just gone out for a coffee run, and I’m sitting here by the window dictating this diary. I have to keep this thing private, though. I’d never hear the end of it if Arjun ever found out I still write to Santa every year. Oh, I see him. He’s coming back. I gotta go!

--ooOoo--

December 30, 2021

Hi Santa, I’m back. I hope you didn’t think I’d forgotten or something. I just didn’t get a chance to finish my story until now. Hope you had a happy Christmas!

Where did I leave off? Right, I was waiting for Arjun to come back to our flat. It took him a bloody long time to come up the stairs, and by the time he got there, I was famished, hungry enough to down the lukewarm coffee and rather disgusting egg salad sandwich he brought me in a few gulps (better that way, anyway, so I could barely taste it.)

Right then, I got a ping on my mobile. It was the Doctor. Arjun said he’d be fine doing surveillance if I wanted to take the call. The best part was it wasn’t just a call! It was a videochat! From Yultidia, nonetheless! The kids and the Doctor were at the top of the snowtubing hill. They were just about to go down and had wanted me to join them very badly. They decided if I couldn’t be there in person, I could at least be there virtually. The Doctor shouted “Allons-y, Rose Tyler,” and we were off down the hill. It was wonderful to hear their shrill, little voices, screeching in delight, and see the big grins on all their faces as they went careening down the hill, but it was all I could do to hold back my tears. I wanted to be there with them more than anything!

“We’ll call back later,” the Doctor told me, “to say goodnight.” And then he said, “Rose Tyler−” And the line went dead.

I tried really hard not to dwell on the memories that that unfinished sentence dredged up, because I knew exactly what the call cutting out meant: something was about to go down.

Arjun argued with me. I told him to shut it and just keep an eye on things. Any people walking by, cars moving. Anything. Even a stray animal. He kept insisting he saw nothing amiss, no sign of a transmat anywhere in the vicinity. But I knew. I’d sonicked my mobile so it would drop everything at any sign of a transmat within a 50 kilometre radius. And that’s just what happened.

I don’t know why I did it (some instinct niggling in the back of my mind, I guess, that prickle of suspicion you just can’t ignore) but I surreptitiously peered out over Arjun’s shoulder just as two lean bodies slipped into the shadows around the side of the Sontarans’ building. It was the Dintashi, I was sure of it, even though they looked perfectly human. The Dintashi were well known for using Shimmers. Arjun had to have noticed, and he hadn’t bothered to tell me. Something was very, very wrong.

I confronted him, and he got this really scary look on his face. Accused me of messing things up for him, saying that I should have just kept my nose out of it. He even pointed his gun at me. I didn’t really have time for his crap, to be honest. I needed to catch the two the Dintashi and the Sontarans across the street. But now, I realized, I had absolutely no back up.

We had two other operatives in the flat below, but there’d been no communication from them since Arjun had come back from the coffee run… And then it clicked. It had taken him an awful long time to come up the stairs... I had to assume he had subdued them, and now I didn’t know if they were alive, dead, or incapacitated, or maybe even  involved in this scam somehow. Whatever the case, they certainly weren’t going to be around to help me.

Arjun aimed the gun at my head. I was so frightened, Santa! I just kept the images of my laughing children and husband replaying in my mind as I moved toward him. If this turned out to be the last thing I would ever do, I wanted that to be my final thought. Them. Always them. Only them. Forever.

Sorry, Santa. Give me a mo’. I’m crying again. I promised I wouldn’t do that…

Anyway, so he’s pointing the gun at my head, and I knew I had to do something unexpected. Arjun knows the way I fight. But there was one thing he wouldn’t be expecting. I activated my sonic, and pointed it at him. It shone an incredibly strong light in his eyes, temporarily blinding him. While he was reeling from that, I knocked him out cold with a solid lead punch right to the side of his neck, just behind his ear, and once he was down, I kicked the gun from his hand.

Of course, I confiscated all his weapons, but I just left him there, unconscious, ‘cause frankly, I needed to focus on apprehending the Dintashi and Sontarans. I called Dad as I ran down the stairs. Told him to mobilize anything in the area. But he said it would be a while before anyone could get to me. They were all a few kilometres out. He also ordered me to wait before engaging. Well, I’ve never been one to follow orders and if I didn’t act, the weapons exchange would go down, unhindered, and then where would we be? Earth would be getting a reputation for being a place for holding these sorts of transactions. It was dangerous and needed to be nipped in the bud.

Still, as much as I wanted to go in there and take them all down, myself, I do have a bit of common sense. I’m pretty good at my job. I can be tough and have good combat skills. Dad wouldn’t have given me the position of Field Commander if I hadn’t been good. But that also means I know when I’m in over my head. This was one of those times. I might have been able to handle just the Dintashi, but the Sontarans were another matter.

But I wasn’t just going to let this go. And there was only one person I could call on who I knew could help me, and be here right away. My Doctor.

I quietly snuck into the room where the aliens were negotiating the details of their transaction (they weren’t that hard to find with my sonic), and sent the Doctor a signal from there so he could easily lock onto it. They heard it, of course, and turned to face me. One of the Sontarans shouted at the Dintashi something along the lines of “…you assured us we wouldn’t be interrupted…” He had his rifle pointed at the arms dealers who looked like they were making to transmat out of there. I shouted for them to stop. They couldn’t escape now! Then, before I could react, another of the Sontarans fired at me with his disruptor rifle.

Unprepared, I went down. All I remember is the disruptor blast cutting across my torso, dropping me, and everything started to go black. I could just make out the sound of the TARDIS, and in my mind, I clung to my vision of the laughing faces of my family, smiling at me.

The next couple of days were hazy. I kept trying to fight out of the darkness but it kept sucking me back under, and always before it did, I would see my  family grinning at me as they snowtubed in Yultidia. I didn’t know why, but I just knew I had to hold on to that image.

Then I remember seeing the Doctor. It was only for a second. The lights were so bright and he was all back lit with spiky hair and his face in dark shadow, but I could see his eyes. They were full of the aftermath of the Oncoming Storm: so unsettled and sad. I was falling under again, the darkness claiming me, and suddenly his hand grabbed mine and his thoughts washed through me. I love you. Come home safe.

And I told him I’d never leave him.

I finally woke up properly yesterday in the medical facilities at Torchwood. I’d missed Christmas entirely, and ruined it for my family. They were all staying on cots in empty rooms nearby. They’d decorated my room with a tree and garland (even some of that garish stuff from Yultidia!) All the presents were tucked under the tree. No one had opened even one. I feel so guilty about that.

We’re going to open them tonight, though. I wasn’t up to it yesterday, but I’m feeling a bit better today. Turns out the disruptor broke several of my ribs and sliced open my abdomen. My intestines had to be stitched back together, but the doctors couldn’t do much for my uterus. They did a hysterectomy, saving as much as they could. We hadn’t been planning on having more babies, but now that the choice has been taken away from me, I feel a bit empty. I was told I had been very lucky that no other major organs were involved, though. So I’ll just have to keep focussing on that.

The Doctor had taken the Sontarans and the Dintashi to Torchwood for questioning and to be kept in detention there. The Dintashi, not unexpectedly, have a ship close by and a contingent is expected to arrive to negotiate for the release of the prisoners. Being a rogue faction, the Sontarans are on their own. Back in the Prime Universe, the Doctor would have handed them directly to the Shadow Proclamation, but he hasn’t done much research into that organization’s presence in this universe, yet. Until he does, the Sontarans will remain prisoners of Torchwood. Arjun is in lock up. He’ll probably be retconned after a thorough interrogation.  The other operatives he (thankfully) only incapacitated are back home, recovering with their families.

As for being Defender of the Earth… I think I’ll be quite happy to lead a quieter life for a while, not that I’ll have much of a choice until I’m properly healed up, which could take some time. Anyway, the title doesn’t seem so grand anymore, even from the Doctor’s lips. For now, the greatest adventure I want to have is spending time with my family, and always holding onto each memory as though it’s going to be my last.

Until next year, Santa. I hope Mrs. Claus and your family of elves and reindeer have a safe, happy, and healthy year.

love, Rose

[bolbianddolanhouse]

BNHA self insert AU

New to the AU? Start here!

Chapter 38: Plastic Taste by Joji 

It’s February and you know what that means! Ita turns 23 and it’s the 7th year anniversary of when Tenya first met Ita. And the first Valentines Day as a couple... Ita isn’t freaking out, but Tenya is.

“Have you figured out where to go on her birthday?” asked Tensei to his very distraught brother “it’s the 2nd.”

“I have a plan and I’m not sure if I’ll succeed” Tenya chopped stressfully “I’m going to do the memory lane trip on her birthday and instead of cake, I make the cookies she made for the class when we met. But”

“But what?” Tensei raised an eyebrow.

“I don’t bake so I’m not sure if I’ll do a great job at making them AND for the 14th, I made that reservation for the dumpling house she’s had her eye on since it opened” Tenya rubbed his temples “but I don’t have a plan for that, no present, no back up plan, nothing! Just the dumpling house after work and go home to see what happens.”

“So this isn’t proposal time?” Tensei asked innocently “I really thought this was the time, I was going to get a suit custom made for the occasion.”

“Why is everyone telling me to marry her, it’s too soon!” Tenya groaned “being her boyfriend was already a stretch when I asked.”

The days pass and it’s her birthday! She woke up a little hungover from the night before having her usual day-before-actual-day celebrating with Mimi, Jin and others in her friend group.

“Wake up, it’s your birthday Mom!” blared Muffin 2.0 “you’re 23 years old now and in great health. Tenya has a message for you.”

“He couldn’t just-” I turned to see that I wasn’t in my bed, I teleported myself into my day-bed in the office, fully in my party outfit and make up “alright, off to an awesome start to 23 Ita! Trashed in the wrong bed and Tenya is probably going to chop lecture me later.” I sigh as the robo hands me a hand written note.

Beloved,

Get washed and ready for a walk where we first held hands and our love story began. I’ll be waiting for you down stairs.

-Tenya

I quickly get ready for whatever his note meant, it was exciting to do something that isn’t cake related.

“Ready love?” Tenya asked as he heard me teleport down stairs “you look so lovely! I did say pink is your color” he hugged her tight “Happy birthday.” 

“Thanks!” I got giddy “where are we going?!”

“You’ll see, lets go in my car” 

We get in the car and drive all the way to the downtown area near UA. I gasp as I recognized where we were.

“Oh shit it’s the old stomping grounds!” I exclaimed “I haven’t been here in years!”

“I thought a little day trip here might be suiting, it is where I first met you” he said as he parked “I guess it’s also our first meeting anniversary, it’s a very important day for us.” He opens the door for her “remember when I first held your hand?”

“Of course, I couldn’t catch up when we went to the cafe” I get those warm fuzzies of that day “I didn’t think much of it because back home my friends would do the same” I start giggling “but then I felt the sweat on your hand and figured it was probably the first time you held hands with somebody.”

“Oh that’s embarrassing” he turned red as they walked hand in hand down the same street they took that day “I thought it wasn’t noticeable” he tightened his grip slightly “can you believe that day I set out with the idea that I was going to confess to you to dismiss my crush on you if you didn’t feel the same.”

“Were you hoping I’d say no?”

“I hoped you’d give me a chance because I was still sorting out my feelings about you” he sighed at the thought “I really didn’t know if it was just a phase or if I was just attached to you because you were new and alone and needed someone to protect you.”

“Well your meddling in that 1st term didn’t help me either” I huffed “my poor little heart caught feelings and it wasn’t fair!”

“Why? I was trying to help you.”

“I know but I tend to love too easily when I was younger” I turned red “I was crushing on you but absolutely refused to say anything about it. Because I didn’t want you to stop what you were doing” I turned to make eye contact “I wanted so badly for you to say that you had feelings for me because I felt all those looks, alone time, hand holding, hugs, hand kisses and promises had to mean something if you only do them with me.”

“They did, it meant I was a coward with a big dumb crush on you and hoped maybe if I hug you a little longer or hold your hand enough times, I’d get the courage to kiss you” he stopped “oh look we’re at our first stop.”

“Huh? OH ITS THE CAFE?!” I was stunned “where we had our first ‘date’?”

“Heh, yeah” he didn’t want to admit that he also called it that “and to this day, I still don’t like coffee.” They get seated in the semi busy cafe and order, he looks at her gandering at the unchanged environment “I think I get it now.”

“Hm? Get what now?” I was pulled back into conversation.

“That love isn’t about just liking the person and spending time with them” he held his hand out for hers “it’s being vulnerable and trusting that person, it’s helping them through rough times, it’s communicating freely and it’s thinking about them when you’re apart.” he smiled when she put her hand in his “that was the missing piece in my understanding on how I should go about expressing my feelings to you. But you’ve shown me love this whole time, thank you for being so patient with me.”

“Wow, it took you 7 years to figure it out huh?” the order came as she said that “I really thought the slow dance kiss was going to do it” she stopped to take a sip of her drink “but instead I wrote you off as on the homosexual scale.”

“Wait, what” he had to pause to process what she said “you thought I was homosexual for a while?!”

“Yeah, I didn’t have another reason on why you acted the way you did” I explained “plus with all that time you spent with Midoriya I thought you had a crush on him.”

He laughed “I see how you’d think that but I was just too nervous to connect the kiss” he sipped his drink “and I really wish I remembered that after party.”

“Oh you kept saying you love me, cried, tried to kiss me, threw up, cried again.”

“I did all that?”

“Yeah but as much as I wanted to kiss you and believe you loved me, I knew it was wrong for me to kiss you when you were drunk” I sighed “every time you got drunk, you’d tell me the same thing and try to kiss me but I wished you’d say it when we were sober.”

“I guess you did the right thing” he remembered the day she left on mission “remember that kiss you gave me before you left for a mission in 2nd year?”

“Yeah?”

“If you had feelings for me, why didn’t you confess that day?”

“I wanted a reason to win and come back, I didn’t want my last memory of you to be a confession” tears welled in my eyes “I kissed you on the cheek to give you a pleasant memory of me in case I didn’t come back, the idea terrified me but I wanted to come back to have a chance at having this.”

“Even if it took us this long, I’m so happy you’ve conquered your fears because of the love you had for me” he comforted her “you inspire me to do the same.”

“Ay pues I’m gonna cry Tenya” I yelp as I try not to cry “it’s always when we’re in public too!”

We stay a while longer and while Tenya insisted on paying, I pulled a pro-gamer move and payed for everyone else’s tabs. I do things to spite others, not to make myself a better person necessarily. The rest of the day was spent around that area, in the shops, remembering certain things, getting recognized and passing by the school gates. It was late in the afternoon when we headed home, Tenya had one last surprise.

“Okay sit here and close your eyes” Tenya instructed her to sit at the table “no peeking!”

“Alright! I’ll keep them shut” the sound of his speedy feet made me laugh “I swear if it’s cake, I’m going to McFreakin lose it.”

“I don’t know what that is but you won’t be doing it today” he said as he was scrambling to set up his surprise “okay, open them.”

I open my eyes and it was a colorful napkin with a homemade cookie on top of it “You didn’t! Tenya~” I started to breakdown “it’s just like the one I gave to the class! Napkin and everything!”

“Today is very special to me and since it’s the first one as a couple” he sat in the chair next to me “I thought recreating the cookies would be fitting, because if you didn’t pass them out, I wouldn’t have had an excuse to talk to you that day” he wiped her tears “the day I met my soulmate.”

“You also made me cry that day” I laughed “but these are happy tears” I kissed him “thank you love, let see if you nailed the taste too” I split it in half and it was mushy-soft and the texture was a little moister than what a cookie should be “texture is...something BUT the flavor isn’t bad! It’s pretty close actually.”

“I remembered it was a chocolate chip oatmeal cookie with some spice, so I followed a basic recipe for chocolate chip cookies and added cooked oatmeal and cinnamon” he felt proud of himself as he explained “I feel like I did a pretty good job for my first time baking.”

“WAIT HOL UP BABE” the jazz music in my head stopped “did you say you added COOKED oatmeal to this?” I watch him nod his head confidently and almost didn’t have the heart to roast his ass, but I did, gently “that would explain the mushy texture, you don’t cook the oatmeal before adding it to baked goods.”

I can’t describe the face journey he went through when I broke the news, other than beet red embarrassment “I was so sure that’s what you do! Then how do you make yours?”

“I do the basic chocolate chip recipe, then add a packet of those instant oatmeal breakfasts that had cinnamon, nutmeg and brown sugar” I sniffed the other half of the cookie “then chill the dough for 20 mins in the freezer before baking them to insure even baking” I catch him make his iconic thinking face “BUT you did get one ingredient right.”

“The chocolate chips?”

“What, yeah, but I mean the other key ingredient” I giggled at his answer “you made this with just as much love as I make them.”

“That I did” he smiles and takes a bite of the half I left on the napkin “oh wow that’s mushy, how are you stomaching this?”

“You made it, I want to eat what my man cooks me!”

“Even if it’s 20+ more of these mushy cookies that I put in a Tupperware that smells like salsa?”

I felt my soul temporarily leave my body at that sentence “You did what now?” he shows me his shame in a salsa scented Tupperware “I’ll eat these if you help me eat them.”

“That’s a fair compromise.”    

“AN IDEA! Lets watch something on the couch in sweatpants!” before he had a say, I teleported to the room to quickly change into my sweat pants and black band tee and teleport back “I’m ready!”

“I will never figure out how you get undressed and dressed in under 5 seconds” he sighed lovingly “I’ll go change into mine while you choose something.”

When he comes back, I had a show picked out but I was a bit hesitant to suggest it because Shinso never wanted to watch it with me because it’s an American cartoon.

“Okay so how do you feel about watching Steven Universe with me?”

“What’s the show about?” He asked curiously as he looked at the season 1 poster of the show on the screen “I’ve never heard of it.”

I explain the gist of the show “...I’ve seen all 4 seasons but they’re coming out with a movie this year and I want to re-watch the show to get me by before the Japan release.”

“I’d like to watch this if you say it’s a good show.”

I was surprised he willingly wanted to watch it with me. We get through the whole 1st season, then I pause and turn to him “Okay, who’s your favorite character?!”

“I relate with Garnet but I really like Pearl and her dynamic with Steven” he gets into it “also the themes are really good! And the music is amazing.”

“UGH YOU HAVE NO IDEA! Amethyst is my sprit gem and I love Be Wherever You Are so much that I learned it on the Ukulele” I try to tone myself down a bit “it gets much more heavy in season 3.”

“We should watch this when we have our days off together” he looks at me “is it weird that I’ve never watched cartoons as a child? But I look at you enjoy them and I feel like a missed out on a big part of growing up.”

“We should have this as our binge show” I check the time, it’s almost 9pm “wanna take this upstairs?”

“It’s a bit late and don’t you have-” he started to say that we should be going to bed but stops and feels me run my hand over the outline of his crotch “Oh you mean that, then yes please.”

It was definitely one of the better birthdays in the books, the only thing that went wrong were the cookies. The days following were busy and bustling with high stress situations in their work-places that Valentines day seemed like a much needed wind-down.

“Okay I trust everything will run smoothly when I head out” I say before I leave early for the day, per Jin and Mimi’s orders “do I need to re-”

“LEAVE!” Jin huffed as he pushed her toward the door out of her office “you got your purse, coat and the quarterly reports. Go home before I floor portal you home!”

“Please for the love of God stop thinking about work baby girl” Mimi pleaded “you’re getting headaches and you know what happens when you push it! Plus you need to get ready for your date, who knows, maybe tonight is the night~”

“Okay, okay! I’ll leave” I gave in and headed out “see y’all later.” I make the drive home and the sky looked cloudier than the morning. I get home and text Tenya that I got home.

“Welcome home Mom!” yipped Muffin 2.0 “reminder of your event later tonight, it’s 3 hours before start time.”

“Thank you Muffin” I booped the robo’s nose “can you please tell me tonight’s forecast?”

“It’s cloudy with a high of 78 and a low of 69, chance of rain is at 40%.”

“Hehehe, low 69″ I giggle to myself “guess I should wear the faux mink coat in that case.” I take my time to get ready, Tenya gets home and does the same.

“I hope you worked up an appetite because we’re going to dinner at someplace a little birdie told me you’ve had your eye on for months.” Tenya teased as he drove us to dinner.

“Tokoyami is a narc as bitch” I harshly said “can’t keep anything to himself!”

“What? No silly! I asked Muffin 2.0 what was on your pinned list and they said this dumpling house in little China town has been on your list for a while.”

My face lit up “NO WAY! You got a reservation?!”

“Yup, I wanted to make sure today was perfect” he pulled into valet parking “it’s just going to be me and you, celebrating our love.” We get to the place half an hour before our reservation but ran into a problem.

“I do apologize sir but we can’t give you the promised reservation” nervously peeped the front door man.

“Why not? We’re early to our reservation.” Tenya checked his watch as he said that to make sure they were early.

“I understand that but we had 2 private parties last minute rent out our reservations side” the front man deeply bowed “they claim to want the privacy, we can fit you in another night-”

“I don’t want another night, I wanted tonight” Tenya was losing his temper a bit.

“It’s okay Tenya” I softly said to de-escalate the situation “we can just go somewhere else.”

“No I’ll take care of this, here I’ll hold your coat” he turned to get my coat and turned back to argue with the front man “I’d like to talk to your manager.”

I knew that if I spoke up and did the whole ‘do you know who I am?!’ gig, the media will take hold of it and make me look like the bad guy. I didn’t want to listen to the pointless arguing and I looked out the window of the place, across the street was a street vendor that was selling steamed buns and other steamed food. My stomach was lurching for any type of food and I knew that we just weren’t going to get seated tonight.

“Hey I’m going for a little walk outside.”

“Okay don’t go too far.”

I teleport across the street and walk up to the vendor’s cart “Hi, couldn’t help and see that you’re selling steamed buns!”

The vendor looked at me and started to get nervous “Yes I am! I have pork with salted duck egg, shredded bbq pork and seafood” they were fidgeting with their tongs “what can I get you?”

“Can I have the seafood one? I’ve never had a seafood steamed bun.”

“Here, on the house” they handed me the bun in a wax paper sleeve “may I say, you’re quite gorgeous. Where did you get that decorative hair comb?”

“Oh thank you! You’re so kind and I got this hair comb when I was visiting a friend in Shibuya a few months ago” I took a bite of the steamed bun and loved the taste.

“It’s a beautiful piece! It’s something my wife would like” they sighed “we just had a baby and our anniversary is coming up but we have neither the time nor money to do anything nice. Everything is for our baby.”

That stirred me the right way because I was about to make this person’s whole career with this pro-gamer move “Hmm, this is quite the bun, how much is it for a bun?”

“I can’t take money from a pretty lady, but they’re 400 yen each” they gestured to their other items “sesame balls are 3 for 200 yen and strawberry dango are 250 yen.”

“Oh in that case” I open my clutch “I’d like to buy your entire stock please.”

“Okay I’ll- wait, excuse me!” they were in disbelief “why? I said I wo-”

“I know, but it’s getting late and you should be getting home to your wife and child” I smiled warmly “I know I’d want my partner to be home with me on Valentines day and you seem like you want to be home with them.”

They teared up “Right away Miss!” they got the biggest bags they had on them to fill them up with buns and the other stuff. “That’ll be...31,000 yen” they cringed a little when they said that.

“Here, keep the change” I hand them a 100,000 yen bill.

“Oh, I’m so-” they started to cry “thank you kind lady! Your heart is pure and your beauty radiates from the the inside out.”

“Oh before I go” I take the hair comb out of my hair, causing all of my hair to fall and drape over my shoulders “here, your wife might appreciate this more than I do” I pick up the 4 bags of food “bye bye! Have a safe trip home and happy Valentines Day!”

“Good Bye kind stranger! I will!”

I teleport back across the street and see Tenya still arguing with the manager but now more people that had reservations joined the back and forth. I felt the first sprinkling of rain on my shoulder, and with my coat still in Tenya’s hand, I had to find another way to stay dry. I remembered there’s a corner store just down the street, maybe I’ll get lucky and find an umbrella. I teleport there and just my luck, theres a robbery in progress.

“You came in at the wrong time Miss!” growled the robber as he cocked his gun at the cashier “move and the cashier gets it!”

“Okay” I said as I smiled innocently. I used my telekinesis to empty his gun cartridge and pry the gun out of his hand. “Oh dang who’s doing that?!”

“Some weird shit is going on here!” the robber yelped as I pistol whipped him “Fuck this! I don’t want to know who’s doing this!” he ran out and I dropped the gun.

“Oh wow, you okay?” I asked the cashier.

“I’m fine just- HOLY SHIT YOU’RE THAT CEO!” he was starstruck as he shakily pointed to a magazine rack behind me “I’m a HUGE fan of your business model! I didn’t go to school to study business or anything but you care for the well-being of the displaced in the hero world.”

I look at what he was pointing and it was the cover of Business Insider Japan I did back in October “Oh dang, I remember that photoshoot and interview” I turn to the cashier “well it’s never too late to go to college and study if you have an interest in business.”

“I don’t have the money to go to a big fancy school like you did.”

“I went to Waseda Uni after a short break to work after high school” I smiled warmly as their self-doubt reminded me of myself “nothing fancy but lots of hard work and dedication to achieve my goal to start a security companion company. Though I got lucky in the industry, learning about the ins and outs was eye opening in college. So I say, give it a go and feed your curiosity!”

“I think I will now” they smiled “Oh! what can I help you with?”

“Right! Um do you have any umbrellas? I’ve been caught without one”

“Yes we do! And if I may interest you” they pull out a can from a display fridge behind them “we’re promoting this canned Ingenium endorsed orange juice.”

I start laughing “Oh fuck it’s real?!” I picked up the can to see the iconic chop stance in the hero uniform “I’ll take 12! I HAVE to roast him on this later.”

“So it’s true that you and him are dating? None of the news and gossip columns can conclude if that’s true or not.”

“It’s true, we were best friends in high school” I tapped on the can “that bitch drinks these things like it was his fuel! I didn’t get into it like him but I’d drink the ones he got me because I had a big dumb crush on him and I wanted him to like me.”

“That’s the cutest shit I’ve ever heard” he fawned over my little story as he bagged the cans “your total is 1,055 yen.”

I paid for my items and teleported back to the restaurant just in time to see Tenya walking out frustrated. I open the umbrella and walked up to him.

“I’m sorry baby, I couldn’t get a table for us” he sighed in defeat “and all the other places are packed. I didn’t want this to happen and I don’t have a back up plan” he looked into my eyes “would you hate me if we just go home? I know you’re hungry.”

“I’m fine with that” I hold up my bags “I bought food! So we don’t have to cook or go anywhere else!” I got a slight shiver “can you put my coat on me? I’m cold.”

“Yes! Let me hold those bags” We head home and he opened the bags “that’s a lot of meat buns.”

“Yeah but I was planning to warp some to Mimi and Jin” I check the time, it’s almost 8pm “they should be home now.” I separate the food evenly so we’d have enough for us and a bagful of food for the other 2. 

Tenya loosens up his tie as he slumps in defeat on the couch to eat “Sorry I ruined your night” he put his hand on her face to cradle it “I wanted everything to be perfect for our 1st valentines day as a couple.”

“What else did you have planned?” I asked curiously, resting my face in his hand.

“To be honest, just the restaurant and maybe a long drive somewhere” he sighed and lovingly looked into her eyes “I know you always say to have a back up plan but I was just hoping everything worked out.”

“Oh it was none of our faults” I smiled “today was just weird.”

“But I wanted to do something that you deserved!” he protested “you deserve everything you desire and more, if I could, I’d give you the world and explore it with you.”

“That’s sweet of you but” I put my hand on his head “I don’t want the world, I don’t care for fancy dinners or lavish gifts. I want to matter to somebody and have the simple things in life, the things money can’t buy.” I push his hair back “we could have one dollar to our name and I’d still love you because you make me feel like I matter with every hand hold, every look and every attempt to understand me and my strange habits” I levitate his glasses off “the way you hold me as I drift to sleep, the butterflies I get every time you bring me close for a kiss, the tender touches when we make love” I lean in closer, softening my voice as I get closer “the way you’re considerate of me, the time you set aside for me when it’s been a long day and best of all, when you want to do the things I want to do because they genuinely interest you.”

With her basically on top of him, Tenya brings her in closer “Darling, if I’d known that’s all it took, I would’ve done things differently” he sighed as she put her arms around his neck “but I’m still learning to be a good partner to you, I feel like I have a long way to go and I’m going to be the best one.”

“I hope so” we connect for a kiss “hehe you taste like duck egg.”

“You taste like orange juice.”

We laugh and just spend our evening on the couch. Thoughts of the future popped in my head, thoughts I buried away because of the pain I went through but I wanted answered.

“Be honest with me” I say as I look out the window facing the backyard, watching the rain pour down “do you want to have children with me?”

“I do, I’ve been thinking about starting a family with you since we were in high school.”

“That’s fucking weird” I laughed and looked at him “why though?”

“I want the family you were raised in, one where you see your parents be loving to each other after so long and have the skills that’ll encourage you to do anything you want to” he smiled “I want to have a big family, celebrate birthdays, have family dinners, see them off to school, see them grow up to be a better person than me and full of love.” He paused a moment to think a little realistically “I know you lost one and nothing felt right after, but I’m going to do everything in my power to ensure that doesn’t happen again.”

“I didn’t know you put so much thought into it” it warmed my heart that he wanted to be part of my family “I’d like that, imagine the quirks they’d get?”

“They’d get double quirks for sure! I’m not sure what other quirks run in my family since everyone seems to have just engine of some sort” he started to fantasize all the possibilities “if your quirks makes you nearly invincible, and mine make me fast... does that mean one of our children will become the ultimate powerhouse of fast and invincible?”

“Who’s to stay it’s not all of them?” I get into the fantasy “but I’d love for the elemental quirks to show up or get telepathic quirks. I always thought those quirks were so cool growing up!”

Good conversation ended our night as the rain poured outside. Talking about the future that we’ll build together made me excited to start a family again. While the scar of past will never go away, his love certainly eases the pain. What will happen next in our story? I don’t know BUT now I feel as though I can overcome anything with him by my side.

-Chapter 38, End-

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