#hmm which just means he would've tried it anyways

[dellovestorant]

[larothoughts]

qijiu thoughts: complicated codependence

after reading a few more shen jiu fics i figured maybe the diverging point when it comes to fan-interpretation is understanding how codependent qijiu is. like, it's not just qi-ge who won't let go of shen jiu, shen jiu 100% spitefully, unwillingly yet helplessly refuses to let go of qi-ge either. the obvious author answer to this is for sj to remove himself from qi-ge because of toxic codependence (see my rant on anti-qijiu pro-sj fics), except i don't think it's in-character for him to ever do so??

the man literally died twice because he couldn't let go of qi-ge until the very, very end. he'll never give up on him as easily as he does in fic, this man is a canonical stubborn asshole who can't let go of anything. that's his entire problem lol

(first time was obviously after lbh gave him xuan su's shards. sj, who had spent the entire time being tortured refusing to bend, cracks at the realization that qi-ge came this time and died. i forgot if him eating xuan su's shards is canon in the qijiu extras or if it's a fanon theory, but i 100% find this in-character of sj to do as a final f*** you to the universe.)

(second time was the qi deviation that caused shen yuan to take over his life. i'll go over this later, but i believe sqh, who transmigrated decades before, likely tried to nudge qijiu into reconciling and instead made it worse. so while in the og!pidw universe, sj never deviated hard enough to die; in this svsss universe, sqh trying to get sj to face his own heart demons literally caused him to die. oops. system got pretty mad because lbh MUST go into the abyss, and so had to scramble to find a sj replacement lol)

preface

much of this is my own interpretation of things btw. i haven't read the qijiu extras in a while so it's very possible some of these things don't follow canon. especially the whole cognitive dissonance part. i've always leaned towards the 'shen jiu is an unreliable, in-denial narrator of his own story, he can't admit anything to himself until he's literally at death's door' interpretation of sj's tsundereness, so that's 100% my own bias peeking through here.

how qing ding peak made everything worse

this a fanon theory i like that has merit given how long qijiu had problems: things would've been so much different if yue qi wasn't chosen by qing ding. like, literally any other peak, qijiu would've had 75% chance of having a happy ending. i feel like any peak with a halfway decent lord with basic empathy skills would have thought 'hmm yes, if we rescue the friend of this little prodigy we can ensure his loyalty to us for life' instead of 'let's dangle the chance of rescuing his friend as a way to get this kid to work as hard as he can until it's too late, then allow the failure to break him down completely so we can reshape him into the perfect successor.' though to be honest the former sect leader probably didn't expect yue qi to literally be broken down.

my thought is that the sect leader kept putting off the rescue over and over, hoping to drag things out until the inevitable happened. but yue qi, naturally wary of adults, panicked once he realized what his shizun was doing. he tried to pull xuan su without permission to force the leader into acknowledging his strength and letting him go... which then led to the entire soul-binding fiasco we see in canon. sure, the former sect leader could've lost his newest experiment, but throwing him into the caves had the bonus of making him late anyway. so a success all around everyone!

we can further theorize the character of the previous sect leader (and how his grooming of yue qi possibly led to his guilt complex and inability to communicate his honest feelings) but ultimately it was qing ding peak's teachings itself that led to yqy's inability to reconcile with sj. because qing ding is the diplomat's peak. the politics peak. the peak where people often cannot say exactly what they mean, must never overtly show favor to anyone, must control every single thing they do or say else the political fallout ruins their sect's reputation.

so it really didn't help that their reunion happened in the middle of sj committing pretty bad crimes like murdering and looting disciples. yue qi went immediately into political clean-up mode, sj misunderstood yue qi's silence as 'i will never tell you' instead of 'not now sj we need to bury these bodies in the bushes', and then later sj was so scornful yue qi's guilt-complex kicked in and he figured 'sj will never forgive me, obviously he doesn't want to hear excuses.' and as yue qi's political position grew, the less he could overtly support and protect shen jiu. the more careful he was of his words and actions, so far removed from the qi-ge sj once knew that sj can't help but lash out. by the time yqy was mentally well enough to talk about the lingxi cave fiasco (if ever), sj had already built up a protective wall of 'this qi-ge is an imposter, the real qi-ge would not have left me.' and yqy didn't know how to tell him the truth without sj's psyche collapsing in on itself. so... he just continued not to tell him.

in which qi-ge is alive but also dead, as declared by shen jiu

sj barely recognized qi-ge once they reunited. yue qi has always been the peacemaker amongst the rowdy slaves, sure, but he'd always been on sj's side. he told sj everything, things he never told the other slaves, and only really clammed up when they were facing beatings by adults in a true us-versus-them scenario. now, however, he's clamming up with shen jiu. he hates it, this intrinsically qi-ge thing that this fake qi-ge doesn't realize he's doing. more than the shiny clothes and well-fed appearance, this is what makes the chasm between them feel real. qi-ge never came back for him, because qi-ge was dead. cang qiong killed qi-ge and all that's left is this qi-ge puppet going through motions of caring for sj it obviously doesn't understand.

(this is easier for him to accept, because if yue qi wasn't mentally dead than he really did willingly abandon shen jiu in the dirt, and accepting that would make shen jiu lose his mind.)

now what to do when qi-ge is dead and he doesn't need sj to protect him anymore? logically, sj should've stayed long enough to fix his cultivation, save up funds, and then leave to become a rogue cultivator before his past had the chance to catch up to him. but sj is not logical. he's spiteful and angry and contrary. he claws his way up the disciple hierarchy on qing jing and spits in the face of yue qi's awkward overtures. he hates the other qing jing disciples, his own shizun, lqg and a bunch of the other head disciples; in fact, he hates cang qiong as a whole because they were the ones that took qi-ge away from him. but at the end of the day, a dead qi-ge puppet is still kind of qi-ge and even if qi-ge threw sj away that didn't mean the reverse was true. sj will not give even a dead puppet qi-ge up; he belongs to him whether he likes it or not (/spitefully).

so as it becomes clearer and clearer that yue qi will indeed become the next sect leader, sj begrudgingly finds himself stuck in cang qiong. one would think things would get better after the former peak lords ascend, since that meant the evil brainwashing sect leader and the resentful qiu-naming qing jing peak lord would've finally fucked off. but no, things actually get worse.

because now that the former sect leader isn't actively sabotaging qijiu's relationship (sure, he didn't mean to break yue qi's mind that bad, but even the worst broken eggs can be turned into a decent obedient successor, except shen jiu's continued existence is threatening to undo all his hard work) yue qi is more able to try and make overt amends. the problem is, by acting more like the real qi-ge, he's threatening sj's mental defense of 'qi-ge is dead, this qi-ge is a fake.'

when cognitive dissonance gives you qi deviations

the more qi-ge acts like he's honestly sorry, the more shen jiu must accept that qi-ge isn't dead. that he either chose to leave sj behind (devastating given sj's abandonment issues) or was forced to leave sj behind and refused to tell him why (more abandonment issues; does he not trust sj anymore??) worse for peak morale, the more overtly sj rejects yqy, the more annoyed the other peak lords get. doesn't sj know how bad it looks for their sect, to have their top two lords fighting like this?? why is yqy not shutting it down, isn't he a politician?

well yes, but as sect leader he now has the freedom to pick and choose when to put his politicking hat on. lqg follows sqq to a brothel and causes a ruckus in the middle of the street? scold sqq for being so overt, because they both know the best way into the brothel is through the back via code word! they learned how to sneak into brothels as street kids ages ago and sqq could have totally done so discreetly! argue with lqg but refuse to explain himself? sqq please, he can't take your side for no reason, especially in front of all these peak lords who already knows he favors you!!

and because shen jiu is facing the cognitive dissonance of qi-ge's... qi-ge-ness, he sets up tests rigged to fail no matter how yqy responds. this way he is always right! if yqy sides with sj, sj's annoyed because he's clearly trying to placate him like a child. if yqy sides against sj, he's obviously choosing to abandon sj again!!

yqy is fully aware of the trap because yqy is a trained politician capable of reading social cues (and sj hasn't changed all that much from when they were kids, he still has that same spiteful edge to him yqy is so fond of). he intentionally falls for them because (1) he deserves to be hated by sj and (2) being hated by sj keeps him from lashing out too much at the other peak lords. yqy is very used to sj's temper tantrums, it's when he lashes out at other people that things become unmanageable.

(during the latter half of their rule over cang qiong, i feel that yqy learned to stop actively chasing reconciliation. he came around for tea and present-giving, kept things civil, and still let sj get away with all kinds of terrible things. he fell for all of sj's traps with his eyes wide open and it infuriates sj, everything about this drives him mad. he doesn't want this soft, unspoken affection, because this was how qi-ge used to handle sj's tsundereness back when they were on the streets. it's another sign that qi-ge is still qi-ge, and this fact brings sj both selfish comfort and undeniable agony.)

it's an awkward balancing act that continues to sour sj's reputation with the other peak lords, but it's mostly manageable until sqh sticks his nose into their business and pushes sj over the edge.

how transmigrators ruin everything

"maybe yqy did something impulsive, did you think of that? why can't you forgive him, he tried so hard? aren't you tired of being angry all the time?" bitch no, sj has been keeping the worst of the qi deviations away for years by performing mental gymnastics around his walls of denial stOP KNOCKING THEM DOWN. Even worse, lbh arrives on the peak and shen jiu hates him. not just because he's got all the potential shen jiu had stolen away from him, but he's so glad to be here. he's making his mother proud. all while shen jiu was dragged here essentially against his will, trapped himself in this bamboo prison out of spite, and then realized the dead thing he's been looking after for decades isn't dead after all. that qi-ge actually did, for realsies, leave him at the qius. that all these overtures, the silent acceptance of his faults, everything could just be out of guilt (qi-ge is ashamed of him) and not out of a ghost reenacting its former lingering affection (the real qi-ge would've still loved him.)

the dissonance, abandonment issues, frustration and everything culminates in a devastating qi deviation. ironically, now that yqy's rule is mostly secure and sj's reputation has soured enough to start negatively affecting the sect, sj finally feels safe enough to let go. in this moment of emotional clarity, sj finally releases qi-ge from his grasp and decides to die.

that was not supposed to happen.

qi-ge's no good, very bad sacrifice

in another universe where og!sqh was too busy plotting to betray cang qiong mountain, the frosty and emotionally charged stand-off between yqy and sj continues for years. then, lqg dies. i'm torn between yqy believing sj killed lqg or not. either way, i don't think he'd be 'disappointed' in sj as portrayed in some fics. i also don't think it would infuriate sj that yqy thinks he's capable of killing lqg, because if anyone knows how much of a murder kitten shen jiu is, it's yqy. maybe he's offended yqy thinks him dumb enough to kill him in such a sloppy way. maybe he's even more offended that this turns the other peak lords against him and yqy just lets it happen.

or maybe (through my qijiu-tinted glasses) it pisses him off that yqy does tell the peak lords that they should all stand together, and the other peak lords ignore him and hate sj anyway. they're disrespecting yqy because they think he is compromised, and sj worked too goddamn hard to solidify yqy's position to have it undone by a murder he didn't even do.

(ironically, if lqg was alive he'd tell the other peak lords to f*** off for disobeying yqy. lqg's canon respect for yqy is something i feel needs more acknowledgement, likely because i feel half the reason they don't get along is because of sj's utter disrespect of their sect leader. who cares if sj is a street rat or the son of a wealthy family, no one disrespects yue-shixiong!)

now the story of sj's road to becoming lbh's plaything is a well-worn track that everyone knows. i do subscribe to the idea that sj took one look at huan hua's eagerness, lbh's vendetta, and yqy's recklessness and made the same decision he did in the svsss verse: he'd rather qi-ge be free (happy) than dead. this is a battle he cannot win, and he'll be damned if he lets lbh drag cang qiong down with him. when yqy promises him he'll save him from the water prison, sj spits in his face and tells him for the final time that xiao jiu and qi-ge are both dead. he let sj go decades ago, and now sj is letting qi-ge go in return.

sj faces the torture with the tenacious spirit of someone who'd withstood worse torture for years. in fact, he's a bit impressed by lbh taking revenge on him the same way sj took revenge on qiu jianluo. either way, even with more than 50% of his body missing, sj faces his fate in utter defiance. and then lbh shows up with xuan su.

the reveal of qi-ge's failed rescue and demise was devastating for a lot of reasons. most obviously, sj's sacrifice to keep cang qiong safe from the fallout was a failure. everything he'd done and sacrificed to keep qi-ge safe, all the scorn he'd borne as the hated qing jing peak lord was thrown away because qi-ge wanted to be a moron.

the other reason why sj broke was because qi-ge did come for him. he simply failed. and the tiny part of him that always suspected qi-ge was still qi-ge now has confirmation that all those years ago, qi-ge likely did the same. he came for him at the qius, but he failed. the only difference now is lbh's willingness to tell him the truth vs. yqy's decades-long silence. the only difference now is that yqy is actually, physically dead.

sj has been living on borrowed time ever since he looked the new yqy (fake qi-ge) in the eyes and allowed himself to be brought to cang qiong mountain. everything he did was to elevate himself into a position where no one could hurt him (and qi-ge) anymore, the same way he'd acted back when they were on the streets. now that he was in this state and qi-ge was dead, his time was clearly up. and sj refuses to let lbh have the last laugh. as much as he respected lbh for his ruthlessness, it's not enough to stave off sj's spite. he didn't let qjl control him in the end, and he won't let lbh do so either.

final thoughts

some last, disorganized thoughts on qijiu's relationship

rather than yqy telling sj what happened, i think showing him the scars all over his body would be much more impactful. sj knows how worthless words can be; he's likely prefer being able to touch each scar and check the meridians for himself. yqy doesn't need to say a word, his entire body is a testament to the torture he'd endured.

ironically, sj fixing up cang qiong as a tactician and his personal refusal to put himself in weak situations made yqy incapable of showing his care through action. all of his crises were political/reputation-based/etc. all things qing ding's teachings guaranteed yqy to fail all his speech-checks. and yqy is definitely not the type of person to engineer a false crisis just to swoop in to save sj... not because of any moral reasons, but because risking sj in any way would be absolutely unacceptable. in yqy's world, it's sj > the sect > good morals. he does have good morals, yes, but he's also pragmatic and self-aware enough to know when to put the things he cares about first.

there was a theory i read before about yqy and sj's trauma responses being to shut down and say nothing in the face of accusations, and i agree with this. saying nothing often netted less punishment than 'making excuses.' even without this coping mechanism, the mental trauma of having his mind and body broken could've easily stopped yqy from being able to even speak around the topic for years. if he doesn't talk about it and no one sees his scars, he can pretend it never happened. sj's scorn of him is forever a sign that it did happen, but that's fine, he's always made exceptions for shen jiu.

i don't really know where the uncomfortably-creepy-no-boundaries yqy towards sy came from? in the original novel sy clearly like yqy and views him in a positive, big-brother-shape light. even towards the end of the novel when yqy confesses, sy feels more guilty for being an imposter than angry that yqy failed sj. yqy even steps aside for lbh thinking 'well, at least sqq is happy now' because that's what he wanted for sj for so, so long. for him to be happy, even if that meant forgetting qi-ge.

(the no-boundaries thing is something i disagree with in general, because i think yqy's political and social training would make that very unlikely. he doesn't call sqq xiao-jiu as often as he does in fics, i think he did so in canon because he was delirious and exhausted post-drawing-xuan-su. i figured qijiu's latter years cooled off a bit as yqy realized direct overtures weren't working and went the coaxing-stray-cat route to everyone else's befuddlement.)

does qi-ge know sy is not sj? i can go either way with this. the theory that he does know but he's repressing it out of his own mental wellbeing is intriguing; but so is him assuming sj losing his memories means sy is a different person. which means he's always been happier without qi-ge. either way, i do believe yqy no longer views sqq-y the same as sqq-j. after the first few years post-qi-deviation, i think yqy is emotionally mature enough to realize sy is here to stay and that the sj he once knew (either because of his lost memories or whole-soul transplantation) is gone.

i am a qijiu shipper, but i do also like platonic qijiu. my only prerequisite for any other-ship-jiu fic is some kind of qijiu reconciliation. i honestly don't think either of them would have good romantic relationships unless they fix their own relationship first. qi-ge can't marry someone, that would remove sj from being the most important person on qi-ge's list. despite scorning him, sj being number one is one of the only things holding sj together throughout their divorce era. sj cannot marry anyone because that would give qi-ge the false impression that sj is happy and qi-ge is now free. and qi-ge is not allowed to be free. he will belong to sj for as long as sj wants and nothing is allowed to interfere with that impression. lol both of these are sj-based, but sj's always been the dominant party in this relationship. whether or not qi-ge is jealous of sj's new lover is irrelevant; as long as sj is happy, the og!sj-simp qi-ge is also happy.

i have too many qijiu thoughts and not enough time to write a fic about them, alas. i find their relationship fascinating and very integral to their personalities no matter the au or ship.

[apomaro-mellow]

Here, take a lil ficlet of Kas flirting with Steve while sharing Eddie's body.

"You're not Eddie", Steve breathed out as they stalked towards him.

"Oh I'm him alright. I am all that he tried to hide away. His shame, his fear...his desires."

"You're not real."

Steve swung his bat, sure that this was another one of Vecna's illusions. Sure that this vision of Eddie would either disappear in a mist or reveal itself to actually be Vecna. Anything other than one of his greatest regrets. Instead, not-Eddie caught the nailed end in his hand no problem.

"I'm as real as anything."

When Steve pulled away, not-Eddie let him.

"But if it makes things...easier, you don't have to call me Eddie." He stalked towards Steve. "You could call me...hmm, Kas." Then he grinned like he had just said a joke.

-------------------------------

"Kas?", Dustin repeated.

"That's what he said", Steve relayed, still reeling from the experience. "That mean anything?"

Dustin looked to Will. "Holy shit."

"Holy shit", Will echoed.

Then they both started to scream and jump and Steve felt like he was losing his mind.

Meanwhile, Eddie was sure he had lost his mind. There was no other explanation for being trapped in his own body while some demonic entity walked around in it and allowed him to get lectured by Mike and Lucas while tied to a chair.

"Do we have a deal?", Mike asked.

The deal was, 24 hour supervision, controlling what he ate, and absolutely no killing. Oh and no conferring with Vecna or the Mind Flayer unless explicitly asked to. Eddie would've agreed in seconds if it meant he could be free. But Kas thought he had more leverage than that.

"Do I get to choose my bodyguard?", he asked, just as Steve and the others came up from the basement. "Because I'd like Hawkins' number 1 babysitter."

Steve stared like a deer in headlights and then looked around as if making sure he meant him. With very little effort, Kas broke through his restraints and walked up to Steve, ignoring the shouts and how the others backed away from him. But Steve stood his ground.

"I know Eddie would prefer it this way."

What he would prefer was if a hole could swallow him up. Which was sort of his situation anyway. He was stuck in a dark hole. Problem was he was still witnessing everything first hand, right down to Kas twirling a lock of Steve's hair around his finger.

So if someone could just actually end him now, that would be great.

Hey I went and made a part 2

[teddybeartoji]

Okiee friend roommie gojo takes you on a motorcycle at midnight to random places like the riverside or some food stall or whatever. Especially when you aren't feeling good (my current mood <3). There's less to no people at night, which is perfect!... Taking a walk with him. Orrr simply sitting on his motorcycle and chatting with him while he stands front to you.. ykwim😭

HELLOO????? HOW DOES IT FEEL TO HAVE A MASSIVE BRAIN, HMM????? THAT'S SO DELICIOUS????? see, i don't think i would've really even considered roomie!gojo owning a fuCKING MOTORCYCLE???? YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH THANK YOU FOR THAT MY LOVELY

btw you guys literally have matching helmets!!!!! he immediately bought one seeing how excited you got after seeing the bike. not to be a basic bitch but how fucking sexy is a white and blue bike?????? my eyes just rolled back into my head holy shit. anyway. matching helmets matching helmets matching helmets!!!! i think he'd love the ones that have the ears on them too lmao he's a little cutie. he also bought you your own racing jacket too!!!!!!!!! i mean he has the money so he didn't even blink an eye at the thought of buying you your own gear bc like... he would never even think about having you on the bike without atleast a helmet!!!! he's not a reckless driver at all and i genuinely don't think he'd speed at all (maybe only a little on highways and only when there isn't a lot of ppl)(he would rather die than to put you in danger like that)

and he'd 100000000000000% go on late night drives with you!!!! he sees you moping and his heart sinks:((((( at first he just tries to ask about it but when you're still looking so out of it, he offers the drive. he helps you put on the helmet and then gently headbutts you after putting his on. he loves the way your eyes smile through the small glass opening and he just already feels a bit better, a bit prouder to have made you smile.

he offers you his hand as you're taking a seat behind him and he always gets so giddy when your arms circle around him. he loves it, he really does. he waits for you to get comfortable and rest your head against his back before even turning on the engine.

you have a code that whenever you want to say something, you squeeze his thighs. when you need to stop, like stop stop, you slap his thigh. he made that rule and he didn't even let you onto the bike before making you repeat it three times for like the first five times. he doesn't play around, i'm telling you. sometimes, you like to tease him for it, for being a pussy but he isn't fazed at all. he just smiles at you and calls you his precious cargo.

okay, so i like the idea of him taking you somewhere extra quiet - maybe you even already have your spot, too? maybe a more hidden part the riverside, somewhere it's certain that you'll be alone. he parks the bike and ofc offers you his hand when you start climbing off. he smooths your hair after you pull the helmet off, making a quiet like jokes about you looking fucking insane and no matter how stupid his comments and jokes are, he always gets a laugh out of you. even if it's the smallleeeest teeniest tiniest little smile.

he takes your hand and tugs you to the lonely little food stall. the person who's managing it has seen the two of you so many times and they're fully convinced that you guys are a couple btw. gojo always pays. ALWAYS. he literally gets upset when you try. sometimes at home he whines about always paying but when you actually get to the paying part he just pushes you away??????? smh he's an idiot but he's OUR idiot.

he let's you eat before asking about your day again. he let's you rant his ears off if that's what you decide to do. he leans against the motorcycle as you pace back and forth in front of him and he's so invested!!!! no matter whether it's work drama, uni drama, some sort of friendship drama or something more personal - he's all ears. he tries to crack a few jokes here and there but he keeps it low as he's gauging your emotions. yk if you're laughing a bit more, he turns the joke machine up a notch but if not... he just let's you talk it out.

btw if you're not in a talking mood at all, he probably does the talking himself to try and distract you from whatever is bothering you. he's telling you about the new parts he wants to put on his bike, he's telling you about his day, about the people he saw on the streets, about the new comic he's reading etc etc etc. he probably invites you to rest against his chest as he does so, faintly swaying back and forth. he watches the streetlamps reflect on your skin as you rest your eyes, breathing in his cologne.

and after a while he offers to go back home. he tells you that he can take the long way or the short one, whichever suits you best. it could be 3am and he wouldn't dare rush you. he is prepared to do anything to make you feel better!!!!!!!!!!! he's such a good roomie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[lord-squiggletits]

I’d love to hear any comments/headcanons you have for pre-Tarn/pre-war Damus!

Those tags about him being touch starved due in part to his Outlier powers had me in my feels 😭😭 I loved that wonderful (and angsty) analysis on him.

Hmm I'm not sure I have that many but let's see if the ones I do have end up blossoming into a more robust list or not

Like most people, I headcanon Damus having an affinity for music long before becoming Tarn; I mean, his outlier power had literally nothing to do with sound at all to begin with (even once he started being able to do it at a distance), so it seems like for Tarn to have 'music lover' as one of his big traits, he would've picked it for a reason, no? Not all parts of Tarn (TM) have to be a complete pretense

Following that, because Damus' outlier broke all electrical devices/machines he touched, he became a singer because his own voice is something he can't break and that no one can take away from him. Maybe he would've tried non-electronic instruments, but he would've gravitated towards singing more than instrumental performance regardless

Also, depending on how you headcanon Cybertronian singing to work (do any of them "breathe"/push air like humans do or are their voices entirely synthesized? Is "breathing" a special mod or does it work as a function of ventilation/cooling), being empurata'd probably could've affected Damus' singing ability since he would no longer have a face/mouth to shape his sounds. Could still sing since he does have a voice box, but I imagine that, considering Damus wasn't able to touch anyone/anything anyways, losing his hands was way less hurtful to him than losing his face.

However, since his outlier ability would make him pretty much functionally disabled on Cybertron (literally everything and everyone is machines), Damus would've had a greater appreciation for physical mediums of art/function more than the average person, I think. In a society where pretty much everything is stored on datapads, computers, etc, Damus would've been a huge pen-and-paper, art canvas, stonecarving, etc kind of guy; a big appreciator of things that can survive without an electrical connection or any machine functioning. He's basically one of those people who, in human terms, would own a lot of antiquated stuff like record players, cassette decks, CDs, etc because his outlier forced him to adapt to (and then eventually enjoy the benefits/unique traits of) physical rather than digital mediums. I imagine this trait would make Damus odd among other hobbyists, since for both anatomical reasons (they're a mechanical species) and cultural reasons (history of mechanical superiority/anti-organic tendencies), most people would probably degrade physical media as less fast, efficient, flexible, etc compared to digital. Which does kind of make it ironic that Damus later became a Decepticon, but I suppose non-electrical/mechanical doesn't necessarily equate to being organic.

On account of not gaining control of his outlier until his outlaw days with Orion and co., I imagine Damus' job opportunities would've been very limited and he would've mostly had a very poor/limiting lifestyle (which also inclined him to be more interested in Megatron's writings and eventually becoming a Decepticon). Creativity isn't running well at the moment, but probably something like waste management (like being a garbage man) or some sort of manual hauling job, although Damus appears to have just been a normal 4-wheeled car alt-mode so I'm not sure he could've/would've gotten hired for heavy manual labor stuff. Perhaps he could've been a courier like Bumblebee was pre-war?

That also begs the question of how Damus compensated for his disability. Maybe to handle electronics, he could do so as long as he wore really thick gloves or something? Probably he'd also take advantage of stuff like voice commands/text to speech on electronic devices, so I imagine Damus' life wasn't completely devoid of any technology whatsoever. Do you think he'd be able to cook food on a stove top as long as he used a pair of tongs to grab it? I bet Damus had to get really good at improvising disability aids and getting basic life functions done without touching things directly with his hands, so maybe he was a bit of a tinkerer back then as well. And now I'm imagining Damus' home being full of elaborate Rube Goldberg machines that do very basic things like turn the stove to a specific temperature and turn it off after a set interval of time klsdalfjkdls

[burningfudge]

the marvels spoilers!!

- i missed carol so much 😭😭 i was so happy to see her again!! however, as a delusional caroljess shipper, this movie made me realize how much i want jessica drew in the mcu but the chances are slim

- is earth really the best choice for those skrulls to stay on after secret invasion???? the US president hates them and is also hunting them down just like the kree. but lol fury should've just asked new asgard to take them in during secret invasion instead of creating a giant mess and then ditching them

(i hope this means a certain mr teddy altman was among the skrull refugees who fled to earth but i'm just grasping at straws at this point)

- it's pretty funny that nia dacosta decided to ignore everything from secret invasion and we should too since i KNOW fury never brought up that he harvested carol's DNA. it would've made the movie much more awkward

- the khans and fury were way too funny together. muneeba was great, as always 🫶🏽 the best aunty

- the poor SABER agents escaping via FLURKITTIES lmaoo

- THE PRINCESS CAROL DRESS

- i can only imagine nakia and bruno's reactions when they find out about kamala's adventures

- carol and sam both live in louisiana now!! neighbors

- kamala and carol are so CUTE! they're twinsies ♥️

- carol restarting a sun...damn. i do wish more emphasis was placed on that since thor nearly died trying to restart nidavellir's sun

- no binary form though? :(

- the villain was kinda boring and i don't really understand the whole quantum bands connection with the noor dimension thing

- KAYT BEESHUP AHHHH

- not kate trying to act cool as if she and kamala don't have the same energy when speaking with their avenger idols (clint and carol should meet)

- but kamala channelling fury lol

- kate needs to get better security though since people keep breaking in into her apartment. first yelena and now kamala

- i don't necessarily want peter on the mcu young avengers/champions team, but i do want him to meet them. kamala found out about kate and cassie so she can find peter, an actual teenage avenger, too

- BEAST BEAST BEAST

- maria as BINARY!!!!

- the suit looked pretty cheap though, which sucks because the binary suit is one of my fav carol outfits from the comics.

- is maria in the fox universe or is it just a "x-men" universe??? anyway it's not 838 for sure since professor x and maria are both alive. however, it would be pretty funny for monica to visit 838 post-MoM since she tried so hard to help wanda and then wanda murdered her mom rip

- carol and kamala are both gutted about monica getting trapped in another universe, but america chavez can get her back pretty easily if they knew she existed. hmm, looks like kamala needs to find another young superhero

overall: 7.5/10

[lwde-encrusted-sideblog]

Blake: Hey Jaune? What was it like?

Shark!faunusJaune: What was what like?

Blake: When Mint showed you "Why Remora are called Shark-Sucker Fish"

Jaune: O-Oh! Well, what happened was ...

~Earlier~

Jaune: *Massaging Neo (Mints) Dorsal Fin* You really put a lot of strain on yourself! You might cause permanent damage one of these days, and I'd hate to see that happen. If you ever need a place to sleep, my dorm room's always open!

Neo stretched out, her back cracking as Jaune's hands worked their magic. Silent moans escaping her mouth.

Mint (Neo): *Thumbs up*

Jaune: What even causes this? Are you carrying super heavy stuff or something?

Mint (Neo):*Signing* Something like that ...

She couldn't reveal she stuck herself to a wall to eavesdrop on some competition. Roman insisted not to kill them immediately, and Neo was reluctantly obliged. She was on there for a while.

Mint(Neo): Sometimes I just ... Have things I need to do.

Jaune: Well ... I can't stop you. I hope you figure out a better alternative.

Neo turned on her stomach to face Jaune.

Mint (Neo): Hey. Is there anyway I can pay you back for this?

Jaune: There's no need. I'm happy to do it.

Mint (Neo): No. *She unbuckles his Belt* I'd love to see what I can do for you~

Jaune: Whoa! H-Hey! there's really no need!

Mint (Neo): Well what if I want to?

Jaune: Well ... I mean If-if you want to...?

Jaune: You should know teeth aren't my only Faunus trait?

Mint (Neo): Well now I'm excited~

Pulling Jaune's pants and boxers down let a set of pale, towering claspers slap against Neo's face. Each one was bigger than most of the chumps that tried to get in her pants, nearly eleven inches each.

Mint (Neo): Oh! Mama likes this!

Jaune: Uh? Thank- Oh!

Neo ran her tongue along the underside of his members, sending shock up Jaune's spine at the sensation, before grabbing onto them laying kisses on each tip.

Jaune: W-Whoa!

Mint (Neo): Never had someone do this before?

Jaune: Not from - ah- someone of your skill!

Mint (Neo): Then I hope you can handle me~

She took one of the dicks all the way down to the base, her nose pressing into his belly, the second dick burning against her cheek.

Jaune instinctively grabbed her hair, not tightly enough to cause pain, just enough give him some semblance of control.

Jaune: WHOA!

Neo began grabbed the one against her cheek, Coating it in the precum that drooled out of it, pumping in in opposite timing to her oral ministrations. Refusing the thrash about, Jaune stepped back a little, leaving his pants on the floor.

Jaune: OH FUCK! Mint! I- I'M!

She took both Claspers in her mouth, taking them as deep as she could, Jaune holding her head against his waist as he let loose.

Jaune: FUCK!

Salty heat poured down her throat, rewarding her for her efforts.

Mint (Neo): Didn't take you for a quickshot.

Jaune: H-hey ... I haven't been through that before ...

Mint (Neo): Hmm. Maybe I should give you some stamina training~ You've got a good chance at being better than anyone else I've had. You're still awake which is more than some can say.

Jaune: ... Huh ... Maidens ... Fuck ... If I was a virgin I probably would've cum in your hair.

Mint (Neo): Well, be grateful you didn't, because I would've bit one of your dicks off.

Jaune: Do? ... Do you need to-

Mint (Neo): Nah. It's almost lunch time, and while you were A nice treat, I Should grab some actual food.

Jaune: What? OH SHIT! I had to meet team RWBY! Uh, I'll be back later? I gotta go!

He pulled his Boxers up, forgetting his pants on the floor, Before dashing out of the Room.

~In the Present~

Blake: *writing down what Jaune said* Oh yeah! That's the stuff!

Jaune: Wait, have you been writing the whole time?

Blake: Of course! Do you know what Fanfiction could be made with this!

Jaune: Could you at least give me a cut of the profits?

Blake: I do it for myself!

Jaune: Well. Damn.

[someone1348]

My first Hunter X Hunter Fic! I'm so excited!

This show/anime means so much to me, It's my favorite! I've re-watched it so many times lmao! Anyway!

I'm so happy to be sharing this with you all and of course we have to start with my favorite angels 😇

The people in this: Ler!Killua, Lee!Gon

Tw: none this is adorable! (This is a tickle fic so if you are uncomfortable with that I don't suggest reading! :])

I hope you all enjoyyy!!

-K <3

____________~☆°♡°☆°♡°☆~______________

A Bad Case of Boredom

It's been about two weeks since Gon and Killua arrived back to Whale Island, the place where Gon grew up with his wonderful aunt Mito and grandmother. Things were going great! Killua adjusted to the new environment nicely and rather quickly too! Aunt Mito was very welcoming, and he really enjoyed staying with them.

They had been exploring and mainly spent their time outside, but today was the kind of day that Gon dreaded the most. It was pouring rain outside. Gon loved the rain, yes, it did great things for the grass and the wildlife. However, he hated being forced to stay inside because of it. He was used to nature, running around the open feilds, climbing trees and overall being free. The rain restricted all of that which brings us to the present.

Gon sighed as his legs bounced up and down on the floor as they hung over the side of his bed. Killua, who had been trying to meditate, looked over gently at the greenette with one eye open before he too sighed and turned to face him,

"What's wrong Gon?" He asked both concerned and curious

"The rain"

"The rain?" Killua cocked an eyebrow, now more confused than before

"We can't go outside, I love the benefits the rain gives for nature, but I hate being stuck inside with nowhere to go and nothing to do!" He complained as he flopped back onto his bed dramatically.

'Ah' Killua thought to himself before he slightly smiled "There's plenty to do inside Gon, for starters you could meditate with me and practice your ten"

That comment earned another sigh from the enhancer

"Alright fine, hmm" the white haired boy sat in thought as he tried to think of ways to entertain his best friend, a single raindrop hit the windowsill when it clicked in Killuas mind, his signature cat like smirk spread across his features as he sat up and hovered over Gon,

"I have the perfect idea~"

Gon shoot up in excitement as he looked at Killua with bright eyes

"Really?!"

Killua only smiled brighter as he nodded "Yep! It's your favorite" his voice got a little deeper towards the end of his sentence which made Gon gulp and giggle a little as he scooted backwards on his bed until he hit the headboard gently.

"Kihillua?"

Killua smirked again before he pounced onto his best friend. The two started a mini wrestling match, rolling around on the green covers, giggling their heads off before anything happened yet as they both tried to get the upper hand. Gon knew what Killua's intentions were, he sensed it in his aura and with knowing him that well, and with his boredom he was more excited than ever for this moment, but he was stubborn too and was not going down that easily.

"Give it up Gon!"

"Never!"

"Fair enough, you asked for it" Gon had the upper hand as they spoke, but Killua quickly swipped the tips of his fingers over Gon's side as Gon's arms wobbled out from under him and he fell onto Killuas chest. Killua smiled and, with one quick motion, turned Gon onto his back, holding his arms above his head with one hand as he sat over his hips.

"Someone wanted tickles huh Gon?~" he teased as Gon's cheeks flushed a quiet pink

"How did you figure it out?!"

"It was easy, one, I know you, and two, you would've never gone down that quickly otherwise~"

Gon looked away with a playful smile before they both giggled together.

"Are you ready Gon?~" he smirked as he wiggled his fingers just inches above Gon's stomach

"Kihihilluaaaaa!" Gon complained through his giggles as his legs bounced gently behind him, this time with joy

"Fihinneee Tickle Tickle Tickleee~" He smiled brightly as he let go of Gon's hands and darted them over to pinch and scribble all over his sides

"KIhihilluahaha! ThaHahat TihiHickles!" Gon squeaked and wiggled as much as he could but made no real effort to fight it

"That's the point idiot, plus your giggles are too cute, so what's the problem?~" He spoke so nonchalantly it made Gon question to himself what was worse, that or his tease voice

"NohoHo FaHaHair!" His laughter picked up the pace as Killua moved his fingers up to his ribs, making sure he got all of the in-between spots, leaving no spot untickled. Gon arched his back a little as he tried to lightly push at Killuas' hands.

"You know Gon, you got seriously injured back at Hevean's arena, I should make sure you still have all of your ribs" Killua dragged his fingers back down his ribs as Gon giggled out an excuse,

"NOhoHo! KihihilluaAhA! I heHealed! ReHehember?!"

"Hmm, I don't remember. A thorough checkup is in order, and since Leorio isn't here to do it, I guess it's up to me! Don't worry, Gon, this won't hurt a bit~" Killua smiled again as he skittered up and down the length of his ribs before starting from the bottom and going up slowly tracing each individual rib while he counted.

"Oneeee, Twoooooo, Threeeee, Foooourrr, Fivveee- hmm? What's this?~" Killua paused as he found a particularly ticklish rib on Gon's left side, where he got injured previously thanks to Geto,

"I think getting hit with that spinning top made this rib more ticklish then the others"

"WohAHAhAh!-" Gon snorted gently as he broke out into more genuine laughter as Killua scribbled and gently scratched over that rib alone "KiHIHIhilLUAHaHa!"

"Woah! You snorted! Haha do it again!"

"NOHoHo!"

"Fine, have it your way" Killua shrugged before his hands quickly made their way down to his stomach, going right under the light fabric of Gon's black tank top

"AHAHAHA KIHIHILLUAHAHAHA NOHOHOT THEHEHERE!"

"And why not?~ doesn't it tickle? I'm confused"

"YEHEHES! IHIHIT TIHIHICKLES ALOHOHOT! THAHAT'S WHY!"

"That's a good thing gigglebug"

Gon's face turned bright red as the kicking got faster as he tried to curl up on himself but couldn't

"Ohhhh I think I get it now, this is your tickle spot!" Killua spoke as if this was completely new information, causing Gon to groan a little at his antics

"KIHIHILLUAHAHAHA!"

"Yes Gon?~"

"HAHAHAHA!" Gon threw his head back in genuine laughter which made Killua giggle a little before he took a deep breath and blew a gaint raspberry directly into his bellybutton

"AHAHA KIHIHILLUAHAHAHA IHIHIT TIHIHICKLES!"

"Okahay okay!" He gently got off of him and patted his arm "you okay, Gon?"

"Haha YEAH!" He tackled Killua in a hug "You're the best Killua!"

"You're so embarrassing" He scoffed as he smiled as he hugged him back.

_________________________________________

I had a blast making this! It's definitely different from what I've done before but I hope you all enjoyedd I loved writing it!

Have an amazing day, evening, or night everyone! You truly deserve it! You are loved, you are valid, you are appreciated, and I could not be more proud of you! /p /gen /pos

-K :]

[xxchthonicreaturexx]

Hey, I saw that your requests are open, so I was wondering if you could write what spending Valentines Day with the Greasers + Tim & Curly would be like. I honestly love your writing so much. If you don't want to do it that's totally fine, it's completely up to you.

-🤍🤍

OKIE DOKIE so this was extremely late... (I am so deeply sorry) andddd I'm going to be writing requests in a much simpler way for a while until I have all of my motivation back. Please bare with me :') 🙏

Starting with...

Darry: He's old fashioned, as I've said before. He is the Valentine's master. Flowers? Check. Nice button down? Check. Dinner reservations? Check. Pretty little necklace or something equivalent? Check. Homemade chocolate cake? Check. Foot rubs after you get back home? Duh, of course.

Had this planned for weeks in advance. Definitely ends the night with the sweetest kiss imaginable after y'all just reminisced on your first date together. Everything's somehow perfect and the boys have been oddly quiet today, almost as if they were threatened to stay far away from you guys.... 🤔🤨 hmm...

Sodapop: Another smoothass romantic, however it's not as perfect as Darry's date. Soda would definitely bring the flowers and chocolate but would probably be running slightly late due to the fact his hair wasn't working with him, or Steve caught him up chatting too long. He really means well though! The entire night his attention is completely focused on you, which is pretty good considering how easily distracted this guy can get.

Y'all go it for milkshakes <3 definitely tries to sneak some fries without you noticing but it's all in good fun. and then after the milkshake is gone he FOR ONCE won't fight you for the cherry. He usually will fight tooth and nail to get that cherry, but tonight he's just "You can have it :D". You see the way his eye twitches though...give him the cherry you heartless monster.

Ponyboy: I'm going to say something you guys would NEVER guess. You ready? Love poem. GASP. Who would've guessed? Yeah anyways, love poem, but it's so good? Like better than the shit you'd write your mom in elementary school. Our boy worked so hard on it too. His garbage can is just filled with scrapped paper and rewrites of the poem. He even accompanies it with a cute little sketch. He's not the best artist, but he certainly tried and it's so endearing too.

Other than that he's kind meh. He'll hand it over, tell you happy Valentine's day and then it's just kinda? Y'all hanging out like usual? Maybe a little more cuddly than normal. That's about it. He's very casual about the holiday.

Johnny: Sweet Johnnycakes. My boy. My baby <3 he had been a bit distant the days leading up but that's just because he had been working so damn hard. Baby boy was working at the drive in, sweeping up popcorn and stuff for some extra cash just so he could buy you that outfit you had been eyeballing. Cue him leading you to the cutest picnic you've ever seen and him handing you the gift, wrapped in a pretty little bow too. His wrapping skills are definitely not the best, but you're opening it anyways so who cares?

The sweetest thing all night. His touches are so gentle and loving and the picnic is breathtaking once y'all watch the sunset together. You guys talk a lot about the future and how far y'all have come. Cutest goddamn thing ever if you're into wholesome stuff.

Two-bit: He's exactly on the line between sexy valentines and sweet valentines. It's hard to tell if he's trying to score a home run or he's genuinely just flirting with you because it's a cute holiday.

Probably gifts you some cute lingerie as a joke. As a "joke" 🙄 you can see right through him, though he does get a kick out of your reaction. A part from him genuinely being a bit of a perv he is actually very loving with you and will definitely take you out to go downtown shopping... "Shopping." We all know he'll sneak a few things off the shelf for you without you noticing <3

Steve: He's a bit of a dummy <3 genuinely forgot. Like- he tries his best but the day completely slipped his mind. Don't worry though! The boys made sure to remind him before he saw you though! He doesn't have anything planned out, but he does stop to grab some flowers and a cake. Was the cake necessary? Nah but it was a nice gesture.

Kinda similar to Johnny, you guys have a nice little picnic in the back of his truck, however his was a lot less plannes out and much more impulsive. There was no blanket or fancy drinks, but there was coke bottles, cake, and a lot of laughing, so he totally made up for it.

Dallas: Haaaa did you think you'd get out of this alive? I'm kidding. Dallas is slightly similar to Tim, but more so he's just not a mushy lovey guy. There's no huge declaration of love or some big gift giving ceremony. He will, however, put his chain around your neck and then tug on it to pull you into a kiss.

Definitely not getting away unscathed. You will have an insane amount of marks left on you, but hey man, it's Valentine's day so 🤷 what did you expect? Definitely the type to be in bed all day, though not necessarily in an NSFW way. Sure, that's a huge plus, but he's also pretty content with you tucked into his arm as he listens to your heartbeat.

Tim: He didn't forget, he just was hoping you didn't remember. Sorry to the Tim lovers, but he sees Valentine's as an extremely pointless holiday. And I mean...? He's kinda got a point but then again, it's still nice to spend the day with your significant other, soooo.... But anyways, like I said he didn't forget. He actually has a small gift for you just Incase you brought it up, though if you don't he'll pretend like he just so happened to think of you when he was out.

He's not all mushy or lovey dovey, but if you happen to remind him he will give you some of the sweetest kisses you've ever gotten for him just so he can shut you up. And maybe if you're good, he'll take you to do something fun later on in the night like dancing. Though, if you're not the type to go dancing at an actual club (is that what they're called in the 50's????) Then he has no issue swaying back and forth with you in the living room as the radio softly plays in the background.

Curly: Actually really good with Valentine's surprisingly. He saw how ruined his parents relationship was at a young age, so even though he's a hood he still makes sure to be the best boyfriend he absolutely can be. Gets you some flowers. However, by that I mean he's actually one of the guys that takes the time to go out to the park and pick the wildflowers for you. Yeah... you're not actually supposed to do that, of course, but hey. Free flowers that he handpicked? Good enough!

Begs Tim to let him borrow the car so he can take you joyriding at night. It's extremely fun, though after y'all are done burning rubber, it'll easily turn into a nice little cruise while his hand rests on your thigh and your song is playing on the radio. <3

[yukidragon]

Wondering on the thought of jack and Joseph being twin brothers? Both being very close and protective of each other and there partners

That's really cute to imagine Jack and Joseph having a good wholesome sibling relationship. It's a strong contrast to a lot of images where Jack and Joseph are at odds, including this awesome non-canon animatic by Sauce.

Now it makes me think of everyone who has a reincarnated lovers plotline with their MC to have them be twins in this sort of AU as well to pair up with Jack and Joseph. For me, that means Alice and Mary would be twin sisters.

Of course this would have a lot of implications about the timeline. Is this an AU that takes place in the past, or the present? I lean towards the latter for simplicity's sake. I also lean towards keeping Mary and Joseph as childhood friends-to-lovers like in her backstory that might or might not become canon for Sunshine in Hell. (I'm still on the fence about the reincarnated lovers storyline. I'm weak to it, but also to Jack never finding love until he meets Alice.)

Well, I've never been one to shy away from self-indulgence. In this modern twin AU, Jack and Joseph get to be childhood friends with Mary and Alice.

Of course... Ian will be a childhood friend too, but Jack and Joseph, always having each other's backs, aren't going to let Ian or anyone else get together with Alice or Mary before they do.

Then again, with how Mary confessed first to Joseph early on, even before high school, Ian would've probably never had a chance to even crush on her, or at least have the guts to act on it.

That would be an interesting bit of drama - Mary and Alice having crushes on Joseph and Jack respectively, as well as vice-versa. Mary makes a move... and Alice feels it'd be too weird for her to do anything with Jack now. Doesn't say anything about it to even her twin, not wanting to wreck things when Mary is so happy with Joseph.

It's a funny reversal really for Joseph to find love before Jack. I mean, thematically it would be more appropriate if it was the reverse, with Jack and Alice getting together first, but this is a funny AU so let's just have fun with it!

This leads to a fun bit of a love triangle, since why not? Ian is crushing on Alice, and so is Jack. They're her friends and Joseph tries to help Jack get together with Alice as well as run interference with Ian. Wacky hijinx ensue!

Speaking of childhood friend AUs, I remember one where Shaun was a childhood friend of MC, which Sauce drew on their old twitter. That would be hilarious if he was also in the mix, adding to the chaos. Nick would have to be added too in order not to leave him out.

Hmm... maybe that's something to consider another time. I'm already making this ramble too complicated as it is.

Anyway, Jack is more sly and sneaky, though very earnest in his feelings towards Alice and wanting her to be happy. He keeps trying to set up romantic moods, wanting to nudge her into seeing him romantically since he knows from being her friend that she's not comfortable with someone just hitting on her. Subtle flirting, plus arranging them to find themselves alone... only for stuff to happen to interrupt them comedically.

It'd be hilarious that Jack is having so much trouble getting together with his sunshine, things going wrong in a wacky sitcom fashion... and meanwhile Joseph and Mary are off in their own little lovey dovey world being all cute and quietly romantic.

Jack, naturally, would both be happy for his bro, but also madly jealous until he finally gets together with Alice.

Of course, this could lead to friendly ribbing from Joseph towards Jack for his struggles, but also plenty of wholesome moments of comforting and helping him out. After all, if their parents are as awful as it's implied Joseph's are in the consultant transcript...

Oh, other twin details! Jack and Joseph could be identical twins - brown hair and all - but Jack just starts dying his hair blue. Alice and Mary would be fraternal twins, with Alice having albinism and Mary not, along with a few other smaller differences between the two girls, similar to how their different incarnations have slight physical differences. For one thing, Mary is taller than Alice, though not by much. They're both still much smaller than Jack and Joseph.

Hmm... bullying seems to be a pretty big part of the backstory of Joseph, and it's also a big part of Alice and Mary's backstories. With Jack and Joseph being a team, they probably get into trouble together, defending each other, and of course their friends.

Huh. Ian would probably be counted in that if they were all childhood friends, when I think about it. I mean, before romance factors into thing, I think Ian and Jack/Joseph could've been friends. That would make Ian crushing on Alice later more complicated if Joseph and Jack both see Ian as a friend. This would especially be difficult on them if they have very few people who care about them like Joseph did in his childhood.

This does add a bit of added spice to the mix. Jack and Joseph might have some yandere tendencies, but they're possessive and protective of those they care for. If Ian is one they care for too, even just platonically, yet he's a threat... that adds in more difficulty for Jack getting together with Alice.

Though, really, I think Jack is going to wind up getting together with Alice in the end. This is both because Jack and Alice just fit together a bit better than Alice does with Ian... and I am shamelessly biased towards my OTP. Sorry Ian, them's the breaks.

Positive side though is that Ian and Alice won't go through a toxic relationship and a messy breakup first. They can just stay good friends and not have things get so twisted between them.

Of course... that does still mean there would be moments of Jack feeling jealous since Alice is still good friends with Ian. A bit more comedic drama even after the romance begins for Alice and Jack... until it gets spicy when Jack has to mark his territory and leave kiss marks very visible on Alice so Ian and everyone else know she's with him.

Really, there's so many directions I could take this twin idea, and a lot I could build onto this sort of backstory. It's definitely a much lighter AU than most of my other ones too, but I tend to skew towards sweet and fluffy whenever possible, hahaha.

Anyway, that's about all I have for now. I hope you enjoyed my ramble that went well off the rails into shamelessly gushing about my OTP multiplied by two! If you want me to circle back to this AU or any others, feel free to drop me an ask and let me know!

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur

[dukemeropide]

8 & 9? 😊

Character Dev Questions | still accepting

8. Where and when do they seem most and least at ease? Why? How can you tell? (also asked by @adeptico)

For the most part, Wriothesley presents himself as both casual and vigilant at the same time, so it's difficult to pinpoint when he's most at ease without knowing more about how he thinks and engages with his environment. As of 4.6, we have never actually gotten to see him outside of his home turf, so to answer this question, I look to his teapot lines:

Traveler: How do you like it here? Wriothesley: Hmm, I quite like the environment. The temperature and humidity are both near perfect. It's a very fitting place for a leisurely vacation. Wriothesley: You really are quite something, to possess such a cozy and comfortable haven, but still be willing to venture out into the unknown.

Traveler: Anything you'd like to do? Wriothesley: I'd like to take a quick walk around here. Would you mind? Traveler: Not at all. It's not like I can keep you in my sights all the time anyway. Wriothesley: Our combat abilities aside, I will definitely stay put if that's what you prefer. Wriothesley: However, you've also gotten to know me a bit by now. It's true that I'm not accustomed to staying in an unfamiliar place for long. Traveler: I figured you would've already explored the place. Wriothesley: That would have been true if we were elsewhere… Making sure that my surroundings are safe is essential. Wriothesley: But this is your home. We don't have to worry about danger here, right?

With this, we can assume that he feels most at ease in places he's highly familiar with. So his office in the Fortress, as one example. His office has the added bonus of being locked behind a pair of heavy metal doors, and also at the top of a spiral staircase, which gives him view of any guests before they can reach him. This is a room that he has completely under his control, that he knows like the back of his hand, because presumably no one else in the Fortress can enter without his permission.

As for how one can tell, Wriothesley himself says that he's not accustomed to staying in an unfamiliar place for long, so anywhere where he's "settled" is presumably a safe space. Inviting a person to tea inside his office probably signals his comfort, not in the "I trust you" kind of way, since he brings Lynette there during the story, and also tries to strongarm Lyney into inviting Arlecchino, but more so in the "this is my turf and I have the upper hand" kind of way. I also believe that Wriothesley prefers talking to people to learn about them, and an invitation to tea provides a controlled environment and a specific etiquette with which to do it. He's comfortable in these situations.

So naturally, he's least at ease in new and unfamiliar environments, and will be obviously restless or hard to track down until he's explored the place to his satisfaction. He seems like the kind of person who, if he ever stayed in a hotel abroad, he'd find himself not sleeping for a couple of days until the place stopped feeling strange and new ha

9. How do they manifest energy, exhaustion, tension, or other strong emotions? (also asked by @adeptico)

Wriothesley's emotions are an even keel. Like the elemental power he's been blessed with, he's cool and steady. This means that UNLESS a feeling is a strong one, it's not going to make its way to the surface. However, we do know from both a teapot line, where (at least in JP) he sounds audibly excited:

Traveler: I can show you some other teapot realms, too, if you'd like. Wriothesley: Wait, really? Wriothesley: So, as long as you wish it, you can visit each of the seven nations without ever having to step outside? Traveler: I can already see your excitement. Wriothesley: Haha, well, opportunities like that don't just come by every day.

And his character quest, where Paimon and the Traveler can see Wriothesley's anger coming out despite, as the Traveler says, how he'd been holding it in until his face-off with Dougier, that Wriothesley's stronger emotions do show on his face and this might be the only indication that they exist. Likewise, we also see a pretty significant change in his expression when he's recounting the story of his foster parents at the end of this quest (seen in this tweet), and we know from his character stories that he's still affected by this memory.

(from story 5)

But the people of the Fortress also know little of the crime he once committed. The only one who still remembers it like yesterday is Wriothesley himself. And no matter how much glory or repute he has earned, he still considers himself to be the same old Wriothesley he's always known.

So all of that is just a long-winded way of saying that despite the steely countenance of the Duke persona Wriothesley wears in public, he does have a rich emotional world that he doesn't often talk about or call attention to. Only those who have grown familiar with him will be able to notice the subtleties in his expressions that make the difference between his mask and his genuine feelings.

[if-you-like-pina-colada-s]

YO HEY ✨AGAIN✨ BROSKI CAN U SHARE WHO UR HETALIA KINS ARE AND WHY U KIN THEM? I'LL EXPLAIN WHO MINE ARE AND WHY I KIN THEM IN RETURN

ANSKXLKSNSNC HI BESTIE!! YESS ABSOLUTELY!!!

Ok ok, I have 3 Hetalia kins, so:

First we have the one and only Mr. United States of America. Honestly the main reason I kin him, I think, is because I AM American and I swear everytime he does something so painfully American I'm like "damn, lowkey I would've done that too" (my favorite foods are hamburgers I mean cmon). Now I wouldn't say I'm as boisterous as him but I am overly friendly and I love making new friends so I am pretty extroverted! I think we'd have a lot of fun together in real life, we'd share the same level of enthusiasm about the things we like. We'd ramble on and on about things like science and movies and where the best place to get good artisan burgers is at.

Next, we have Mr. Italy (North Italy to be specific). He is very creative and artsy, and so am I!! I adored that part in season 7 where he tried to explain how to make art to England and failed miserably. That's me. He's very bubbly and happy-go-lucky just like me. I bet my ass he's the art kid who gets asked to "draw me next!" To which he just rolls his eyes in response. I also think he's incredibly unhinged and would say the most fucked up shit at random moments and then finish his sentence as if that's completely normal.

Last but not least, Mr. China!! Yall should know, I am a big sister and also the oldest grandchild in the family. So I very much feel like I share the same "eldest sibling" energy with him. He's the responsible older bro who tries to look out for his younger siblings, but isn't exactly the... best sibling all the time. Not exactly parent material, he's just quite literally older brother material. Also, even though he carries a mature, responsible manner, he's still incredibly unhinged at times. He's one of the few characters with actual braincells but he'd still be totally down to commit arson! Its also said he's a huge fan of cute stuff (such as Hello Kitty) and me too!

And of course there's the things the three of 'em have in common:

I feel like all three of them are just silly goofy guys who laugh and joke about the most fucked up shit ever. They're just ever so slightly unhinged.

I also think they're very booksmart, but can't read the room for shit like me.

They're all quite egotistical, while also extremely insecure.

Not to dump my insecurities on yall but... lowkey I suspect these guys have like, MAJOR abandonment issues. They tend to keep their friends and family in a sort of choke hold. It doesn't look like they particularly enjoy being alone or left out. And REALLY take issue with people leaving them.

Again... not to dump things on yall... but they seem a little... idk, maybe a bit adhd to me? Maybe I'm just projecting onto them since I suspect this of myself. (I'm no expert and have never been diagnosed for any sort of neurodivergency. So this is all a "hmm I wonder?" sort of a speculation).

Anyway, they're just so silly goofy.

[willel]

I thought Hopper and Bob were stated to be old friends from high school even though they didn't exactly cross paths. Maybe like you said, they knew each other but did not exactly talk while Bob was secretly crushing on Joyce. Hmm... I wonder how they're gonna portray that then? Because from what we know, Joyce did not exactly have a connection to Bob until later on. Are they gonna just kinda change that? If that's not the case it would mean that we're just gonna most likely see Joyce and Hopper together instead, with a little bit of Bob, also I am not sure how correct it is but the wiki says that Bob was classmates with Joyce and Hopper, which is ig interesting. I do not think Bob would be 2-3 years old younger than Hopper or Joyce though because it is said that Hopper and Bob knew each other and were friends to an extent, I think they must have been in the same year for them to meet, but I am not sure. I just wonder how they're gonna connect their dynamic together since Joyce is said to be unaware of Bob's existence whereas Hopper seems to have a more connection to Bob when they were in highschool.

I'm imagining a situation where Hopper is the kid that kinda talks to everyone but isn't exactly super close friends with anyone? The one that's always chill but doesn't get too close.

So it'd make sense if he was friends or friendly with both Bob and Joyce but Joyce and Bob never actually crossed paths/met face to face.

One hour he's skipping class smoking cigarettes with Joyce under the stairs. The next hour he's with Bob in the library as Bob is trying to help him write a paper.

Next hour, I guess he's screwing a girl in the back of his dad old car as he claim he did in season 1.

If I had to guess what they're going to do with Bob, he's going to be connected to Hopper, who is connected to Joyce. Maybe it's possible out of all the kids, Bob is the one that interacted with Henry once or twice. He created and looked over the middle school AV club after all and that seems like something Henry would be interested in.

Then again, I don't think Henry was THAT into it because Will was able to use morse code to get by the Mind Flayer's mental block on him. If Henry knew Will was using morse code, surely he would've stopped him from doing that too. Then again, he was only there for a month, so it's not like Henry could've memorized morse code that quick. It could fit actually.

Bob really cared a lot about the whole outcast thing and being bullied. And how he never stood up to his bullies and admired that Joyce did. I dunno. I can see that coming into play.

Imagine a repeat of season 2. Bob telling Henry,

Bob: If my parents treated me that way. I would stand up to them once and for all. You get me? Don't be afraid to talk to your parents.

Henry: Oh ok. -goes home later that night and tries to murder everyone-

Bob seeing the news: Oh... his parents really were terrible. His dad ended up murdering him. :C

Pfff. Random thought don't take it too seriously. But anyway.

As for the same year thing, that's not necessarily true. Take Robin for example. I think she's a year behind Steve but shared at least 1 class with him. Depending on the high school, the subject, and the student, it's not odd for there to be younger and older students together in the same class. I wouldn't be surprised if Bob was super smart and was put into some higher level classes. Not sure if the concept of "AP class" existed back then but maybe it did.

So it'd be like:

Bob - direct interactions with Henry encouraging him to defend himself, much like he did for Will

Hopper - No interactions with Henry but has interactions with Bob, Joyce, and his parents. We got a lot of Hopper exposition in the show already to be honest so I don't think we need too much more

Joyce - No interactions with Henry or Bob but interacts with Hopper . Will probably learn about her family dynamics and how she came to know Lonnie. May have very indirect connections to the Creel tragedy.

Henry - Might barely appear to be honest, might be more focused on Virginia Creel and an occasional scene with Bob or something

At the very least could make for some fun fanfiction one shots!

[zeviyer]

Prompt [by @ssbooks]: Write a story but you can only use dialogue and sound effects. No description, No describing where the reader is.

TW // Mentions of Domestic Abuse and Childhood Trauma

This is one of the first pieces I've written in a very long time. I typed until my laptop almost died, until my wrist hurt. If you liked it, cool. If not, I'm sorry..

Wu-wuum

"Hello?"

"Heyyy."

"Heyy, what's good!"

"Shit, just glad the day is over with"

"Damnnn, that bad huh"

"Not even, just emotional."

"What happened?"

"Nothing in big even happened forreal, I was just feeling..everything"

"mmyeah visiting the home you had to leave'll do that"

"Yeah I know, I know. I just didn't expect it to feel so.. dramatic, very Degrassi"

"How did they react when they saw you?"

"When I got there only Chance and Jamar came to the door which is great because I was only there to see them. They got me through it forreal"

"Yeahh I bet. Yall were getting on my damn nerves with them late night memes"

"But they be funny though!"

"yeah, still kinda annoying at 4:37 am"

"Sorry. I do be laughing loud"

"As hell. But it's okay, I know how much they mean to you, that's why I didn't say anything"

"Yeah! That's the main reason why- damn excuse you!"

"What happened??"

"This mega-Chad just bumped the fuck into me"

"Uht uhnn does he not know it's Feburary??"

*laughs*" I'm saying! MOVE bitch, get out the fuckin way! It's Black HIstory Month"

*laughs*

"But naw, Chance and Jamar are the main reasons why I even wanted to go in the first place."

"Yeah, how are they doing? It's been like six, seven, eight months right?"

"Eight, yeah. They're doing good! Chance is getting a lot better at skateboarding and Jamar is currently obsessed with this show on Prime called The Legend of Vox Machina. We watched a couple episodes together, he was happy to restart it again, nigga's seen it three times already"

"Hmm! I keep hearing about that show. How is it?"

"It's. hilarious. Really fun to watch, very D&D meets Invicible"

"Ooouuu that does sound fun. Must've been even more so to watch it with them"

"Oh my goddd yes. Sixteen year old me was into Gravity Falls heavy so watching that with them felt so normal. Normal childhood, normal life. I almost didn't want to leave."

"Well you could've stayed! We got pizza in the freezer I would've been good"

"Yeahh but that's not why I left. It was Rachel. She was being so weird. Like really weird"

"OH because she know you-"

"OKAYY! She feel it"

"No forreal, probably alone crying right now"

"OKAYYYY! *laughs* anyways, she was just being weird she was helicoptering us. Like every now and then she'd pass the living room, acting like she's getting whatever the fuck just to go back to her room with nothing. She tried talking to me but I wasn't having it forreal. Very one word answers very "Yes. No. I don't know ask them"

"Oh she knowwssss"

"Literallyyy! When she was talking to me she stood leaning against the doorway, arms crossed. She even tried giving me some of the dinner she made for them; chicken and waffles, but I was like "I'm good" "

"Right"

"And I could just tell she feels it. She feels that I've moved on and I genuinely don't give a fuck about her anymore. She thinks just because she's "our" mom she gets to enjoy me being there. Noupe, I'm here for them bookie"

"Exactly, period. Mwah, dead trauma"

"Well they still have to live with her so-"

"Right right I know"

"I feel like she was trying to wedge her way in to what we were doing, trying to share our good time, our memory. Experience us in that moment, experience me. But no, I take that from you. You lost that when you did alllll that you did to me"

"Yup. Heavy on the I take that from you. How long was she sitting there for?"

"Only for half-an episode. I feel like she felt my straight face"

"Right because you knew what the fuck she was doing."

"Trying to be manipulative, as always. Trying to guilt me, trying to "Why you don't speak to me" me. Which she's far too late. "

"Yup"

"But yeah, after that happened we kept watching and then started talking about their lives. They said school is good, still friends with Aiesha, Jordan, and Chris"

"That's good"

"Yeah. Then we talked about how we felt about everything since. It was kind of depressing. They said sometimes they get really sad about how their lives are. Well really, their life with her. They said they can tell when she's had a bad day at work so they go to their rooms, which doesn't help much because even though she's less physical, not throwing things anymore, she still yells at them to wash the dishes or make dinner because she's tired. They said she makes it hard to be happy because she's always saying something about what they do, whether it's them gaming or wanting to hang out with their friends. It made me feel bad, like it could be better if I stayed"

"But it wouldn't, she'd still be yelling at them, shaming them and shit, only difference is there's one more to yell at"

*laughs* "Yeah, they're much smarter than I realized, because they said that. While we may be related, they know our lives are different. They said they know how it is here and they don't want me sticking around for their sakes. It'd just be one more nigga to traumatize. They said they see how much happier I am, how better I am and being there would just suck all of it away, coping mechanisms or not. I wanted to cry.

"I'm so sorry..."

"It's okay. He's right, me being there wouldn't be better, maybe for them but not for me. I left because I couldn't take her abuse anymore, I just wish I could've took them with me. I wish I had the space, hell fuck the space, the money to take care of them."

"I know. I know how much you want to help them, but by visiting them when you can, spending time with them, actual time, actual moments with them, helps in more ways than you know. They're able to share what they're going through with someone they know went though the same and worse. They get to know, for sure, that they aren't alone"

"And here's them being smarter than I realize again because they said that too. They said by coming over and talking about it with me they can see how much it affects them and are able to deal with it. In a way that isn't harmful. Chance said one day like a few weeks after I left he started doing what I used to do with them to cope; journaling, hobbies, alone time on the roof. It wasn't the same with me gone, but it still helped so he and Jamar have been doing that together.

"See? You were helping them then and you still are now"

"Yeah. It still fucks with them but not to where they don't want to skateboard or go out anymore. It's more so the lingering "damn why does my life have to be this way" that they deal with. I was like bitch same. Literally my thoughts at their age. Which isn't great but you know..." "

"Damn, them some adult ass teenagers"

"I know right?? I was like when did yall get so mature they was like "we're literally sixteen you think we still need a smiley chart?" like woahhh okay not too much"

*laughs* "Uht uhnn smiley chart is crazy"

"Is crazyyy! But yeah, after that I started to get ready to leave. They say they're okay with me not being there but I saw how much they didn't want me to leave. I saw them checking the time. *sigh* But overall they're doing the best they can. I just need to be there for them whenever it gets too hard to handle"

"Exactly. That's your job now. You're not their guardian, their parent. You're their brother with your own life, your own healing journey. You do sleepovers, trips to the beach and Comicons. Not dinner, abuse, and permission slips."

"Tch, yeah....yeah"

"And I'm sure with what you're doing, their friends, skateboarding and whatever new obsession, whatever hobby, they're going to keep taking after you and walk a similar path of healing you did"

"Yeah. Thank you, that really does make me feel better"

"No problem. Speaking of Comicons, you got your DreamCon tickets?"

"YOU KNOW I DIDDD!"

"ayyee les gooo"

"YEEUUHHH but- Wednesday we gotta clean up the place though"

"Oh-kayy why thursday?"

"Because I got them tickets too and their gonna sleep over for two days before we go"

"AYYYEEEEE PERIODD CMON BIG MAMA! BIG MAMA!"

-end-

[shrinkthisviolet]

1, 5, 8, & 15

1. Have you pulled inspiration from media sources other than the property your fic is related to (a plot point from a TV show that has nothing to do with the characters/setting of the fic, a line from a book, etc.)? If so, for which story? Why did you find that media source compelling?

When it comes to general trends, I tend to pull from Star Wars and Ace Attorney (mostly the themes for the latter, not so much storylines). Mostly because that’s just the media that sticks with me the most. Even from LOTR sometimes, although it’s been a while since I’ve seen those movies. In terms of specifics:

To write Morgan & Jesse, I pull from Parent Trap, specifically Hallie and Annie’s dynamic! Which is hardly a secret, given that the two sets of twins share a birthday 😅 granted, Morgan & Jesse DO get along at first until the Zoom thing happens, but…honestly, I think they’d rub each other the wrong way regardless. Meeting your doppelgänger from another Earth doesn’t come without ~some~ insecurity…

To write Barry & Morgan, I draw…well aside from my own experiences (with my dad mostly, as I am the oldest sibling), I draw from other brother-sister relationships that I love! Especially from Justin & Alex in WOWP (the movies specifically—I know in the show they tend to have a bunch of ups and downs, and Barry & Morgan are a bit more steady aside from their rough patch in s1…and in s3). Also, as weird as it sounds, from Zuko & Izumi a little bit too 😅 at least regarding the protectiveness aspect, not so much the father-daughter aspect (Barry isn't Morgan's dad, he's her older brother, even if those two positions sometimes overlap in some situations...even if Barry at times feels like he's doing things for Morgan as her brother that Eowells ought to have done as her father).

Also, I haven’t written s3 yet, but I’m gonna draw quite a bit from Star Wars 👀 not gonna say how or why, because that’ll give too much away, but you’ll know it when you read it.

For Lucy & Astra, I pull from female friendships I've seen in multiple places...Astra even has a little Mara Jade in her with her quick wit and sarcasm.

(Also ofc for some storylines in my Morgan AU, I’m pulling from the comics, but like. Ofc I am, that’s the source material even beyond the show, and as we get more and more divergent, it's a nice way to validate myself and the changes I'll be making 😅 because some of them are gonna be major)

5. Is there a tiny detail in one of your fics that you feel goes tragically unnoticed?

I’ve answered here, but here’s another:

In Chapter 10 of i still love you (i promise), I incorporated that bit about how when Eowells takes off his glasses, he's speaking with complete honesty, or something close to it (a Tom Cavanagh quote if I'm not mistaken):

“Yes, well…when I was growing up, that is what I was taught.” He sighed, taking off his glasses to rub his eyes. “Sometimes I wonder how much of what I was taught is really true. But…I suppose I can’t help it. Right or wrong…I can’t bring myself to regret anything I do for you.” He lifted his steely gaze to meet hers, and…maybe it was her imagination, but he seemed to be challenging her. It was almost…almost as though he knew— No. He couldn’t. He hadn’t come to see Ronnie and Stein off—there was no way he knew— “Anyway,” he interrupted, “I’ve taken too much of your time, I fear. Remind me when your acceptances are coming in?”

He's speaking with an intense honesty here, essentially saying he doesn't regret what he did (people caught that latter part, but him taking off the glasses is me accentuating that “hey, he really, really means it”)...and also hinting that he knows about something else. Something that Morgan clocks but tries to deny (and continues to deny, otherwise she would've brought it up to Barry and Iris at the end). Hmm but what could that possibly be?

8. Is there a story idea you have that you would love if it could appear fully realized but that you do not think you’ll ever write yourself?

So I’ve read that Iris was apparently supposed to be a criminal psychologist in the original pilot of the Flash? And now I need a fic of that so badly (preferably with Westallen endgame, but Westhawne would be sweet too). Whether she ends up a reporter by the end or not, doesn’t matter—I just wanna see Iris using a loophole (“you said I couldn’t be a cop, you never said I couldn’t be a criminal psychologist”) to work in the CCPD, and her and Barry teaming up for cases.

Could even be a great way to show how she and Barry approach things differently — have them on the same case, and Barry is very logical/clinical while Iris is more empathetic/big-picture.

Ooh and Iris figuring out Barry’s secret because “Barry. What kind of idiot do you take me for. I work right alongside you, we’ve worked cases together—do you honestly think I wouldn’t notice when your habits changed, when you ducked out of work, when you ducked out of meetings with me?”

AND and Iris figuring out Eowells’s secret that way too, because she knows how criminals think and Eowells is fitting that profile very well as time goes on. Barry won’t hear of it. They argue, day in and day out—that’s what their tension throughout the season is about, not Barry and Joe lying to Iris.

Iris & Joe teaming up to investigate Eowells too 👀 as Joe has come to see Iris as a professional equal much earlier and now treats her as such

Like!! The potential!! I don’t know enough about criminal psychology to write this (and I don’t have the brainspace to devote to researching it fully) but I’d be so down to read a fic like this.

15. Is there any genre, trope, or style that you find particularly challenging to write? Do you enjoy the challenge or prefer to avoid it?

Misunderstandings, simply because of how much I usually dislike the trope 😅 it can be useful if done properly…but it’s not always done properly. Sometimes it’s a very basic misunderstanding that has no reason to stretch on for as long as it does, because it would really take one conversation that only plot contrivance is preventing.

To some degree, I felt like I was falling a little into that trap by the end of i still love you (i promise) and that was a challenge (a welcome one, though) 😅 to most, Barry probably appears very stupid, much like the version of the trope I despise. Which is fair! But hopefully when I finish his POV fic, it’ll become a little more clear what he’s thinking. In any case, it’s definitely a learning experience for me as a writer, and that’s always a welcome thing.

fanfic ask game!

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

What *are* your more-specific thoughts about what might've happened with regards to Dazai before Mori met him/Dazai and the old boss? Your tags in that timeline post intrigued me.

Oh, thank you! And hello!

Hmm, well I'll say one thing straight up: I don't have much in the way of specifics. I'm the kind of person who finds it really difficult to make theories in the absence of hard evidence (I've gotten that beaten into my skull from my time in the sciences haha...).

Having said that, there are three ideas I have about Dazai's life before meeting Mori: one which is more headcanon than anything but that I believe at least partially resolves some of the contradictions I mentioned earlier and two which are vague but I really think have to be true.

#1: Dazai is the son of wealthy mafia benefactors who was later taken in by the old boss.

This is the more headcanon-y one but it makes a degree of sense to me. If Dazai was the child of the old boss then he would've been involved more directly in mafia business but he wasn't. Fifteen implies he wasn't even around death all that much, which is likely why the old boss's death provoked such a darkening of his eye and why he thanked the GSS soldier for allowing him to witness his death. If he was the child of benefactors, he may have met the old boss and some of the higher ups, and they might've known who he was - he'd be someone relatively trustworthy without any direct relation. Also, if his family were wealthy and mafia-affiliated, they would have had to engage in those kinds of high-class social connection games - you know, gracious manipulation, get the right people on your side, never let people see you without a smile, that sort of thing. Dazai, at age 15, was already capable of this. He didn't learn it from Mori; Mori just honed what was already there. It would be interesting as well if something happened to his family, leaving Dazai to wander alone for a bit before getting picked up by the old boss, who maybe recognized him. Then, as the old boss succumbed further to his paranoia, he might've lashed out at him, he might've been behaviourally unpredictable, he might've decided young Dazai was the only one he could trust... it's hard to say. No matter what happened between them, there must've been some fondness - Dazai is notably more wary than angry or scared when the old boss attacks him in the fight against Rimbaud and then there's what Hirotsu said about Dazai understanding what Mori did - but also something happened between them or adjacent to them to make Dazai slip further into despair, enough that he tried to die multiple times.

#2: Dazai's ability and suicide attempts were triggered by a constant and inescapable lack of control.

Ok, so I don't have a lot of specifics for this one but I really think it must be true by necessity of his characterization. It's implied that abilities have triggers, which is interesting because it ties into that "abilities are trauma responses" theory I've seen around. For Dazai's to negate abilities - a defensive skill that negates often unfair advantages - it really makes me believe that he developed it because he had no power. Maybe there were lots of skill users around him. Maybe they hurt him and he couldn't get away. This is all hypothetical but the point is that constant and inescapable pain leads to what's called learned helplessness.

Learned helplessness is a behaviour that occurs when an individual is repeatedly subjected to something harsh or unpleasant with no means of making it stop - they have no control over when and how long they will be harmed. Eventually, even if you give them an out, they likely won't take it, because they have internalized the belief of "why bother? i can't control what happens to me anyways." It's one of the underpinnings of major depression and c-PTSD.

I find it very interesting that Dazai apparently took no action of his own asides from trying to end his own life until Mori showed up and gave him an out - perhaps that's part of the reason Dazai remained loyal to Mori until he chose to sacrifice Odasaku. I heavily believe Mori, like always, was the preferable alternative to an already horrible situation. I've commented before on how Dazai is not proactive and has to be pushed into doing things. Much of the time, he doesn't seem to see a point to it. Either that, or he's actually got the whole situation under his control already, which ties into the main reason I think he came from this kind of powerless background - he's a huge control freak.

It starts with Mori. Dazai realizes he can threaten Mori into being afraid of him and it works. Then he tries to control Chuuya. That didn't go so well. Very annoying. Also a little bit threatening to him. He continues to try and one-up the guy. He did manage to manipulate the Sheep and then scare other members of the Mafia into fearing him. Good. He is in control. Then he honed his mind under Mori, so that he's always a step ahead. What's more, he already knew how to slap on a smile so everyone thinks he knows more than them even when he might not. He maintains this underlying control not just in his mafia days but also with the agency, which is, in my opinion, one of his major flaws that holds him back from developing as a person.

Thing is, if Dazai just liked feeling superior to others, I would expect his reaction towards being waylaid to be more anger-based. Sure, he can get irritated, but what we typically see more prominently is actually a flash of shock, desperation or fear - think of the Q chapter (shouting and racing back to intercept Atsushi as quickly as he could), 55 Minutes (his shocked and uncoordinated attempt to lash out after being stabbed), Fifteen (his expression at finding out Arahabaki's identity) - before he schools himself back under control. It comes across less as a desire for control and more of a pathological need for it - I wouldn't expect to see this reaction in someone who had control when they were younger.

As an addendum, it's also good to note that Dazai seems to be disgusted and feel more hatred (actually rare to see open expressions of these from him) for people who control others in some way - Fyodor, Q. Moreover, his respect for Chuuya, someone who similarly comes from a background of a lack of personal agency, is to openly offer him a choice in the form of a question. It's more than just performative; he really did try to come up with backup plans so that if Chuuya legitimately wanted an out, he could have it. When you draw the through lines, I think this makes sense.

#3: Dazai was an emotionally neglected child.

Alright, this is the last one and I'll try to be more brief about it. I mentioned that Dazai had to have picked up his ability to read the room and "sweet-talk" people into telling him things long before he met Mori, but I should also note that genuine matters of the heart seem to be incredibly foreign to him - as an example, his inability to understand how Rimbaud's concern for his partner could be such a powerful motivator for his actions. The answer to this is, of course, that one is fake niceties and the other is real connection. Dazai, being hyper-intelligent, likely picked up on social fakery from a young age but did not have the offset of real concern for his feelings or well-being as a necessary balance. It's interesting because Dazai is actually very skilled at picking up on other's feelings and dispositions even if he doesn't necessarily get it - his blind spot is actually his own feelings and how other people relate to him.

Emotional neglect is characterized by the absence of caregiver interactions in nurture, connection and response to distress. The caregiver consistently responds to the child's emotions by ignoring, dismissing or demeaning them, which leads the child to withdraw and believe their feelings are wrong and unimportant. They often struggle with relationships because they feel chronically disconnected, isolated and misunderstood.

Signs and symptoms of neglect include:

Low self-esteem

Odd emotional responses and poor regulation

An inability to ask for or accept support from others

A lack of language for describing feelings

Dissociation and "shutting-down" (lack of emotional responsivity)

Distrust of others

Persistent feelings of loneliness, guilt, and shame

Purposeful sabotaging of relationships in order to avoid rejection and hurt

It is also highly associated with anxiety, dissociative disorders, depressive disorders and c-PTSD. Um. Yeah. I don't think I really need to explain too much here.

Whenever Dazai attempts to be more sincere, it typically comes out kind of awkward. He stumbles over his offer to Rimbaud of fulfilling any last wishes or favours as he lays dying in Fifteen, awkwardly asks if him and Odasaku will meet again in Day I Picked Up Dazai, and hesitates trying to find the right words to reveal the truth to Chuuya about the resetting of his code on activation of Corruption in Stormbringer. It's like he has no frame of reference for how he should act or feel. In these cases, it legitimately comes across as him just not knowing.

More than that, Dazai is very... clingy. Like. When he gets to know someone he needs to invade their space. He needs so much attention. He pokes and prods at Chuuya incessantly. He rambles away to and is always in Oda and Ango's personal space. He annoys Kunikida to no end and is ridiculously happy when the man snaps and attacks him. Pops up behind Atsushi and generally gets in his space. Needs to cause some ruckus daily and have people react to it. Yeah. It's comedic in the context of the series but also... you know... you know.

In summary, I like theories that focus on Dazai as a human being with trauma. While I've seen some cool ones that wonder if he is not human or if he's connected to The Book, they don't sit right with me since I think his arc is all about realizing he is, in fact, human, and the ways in which trauma can mess you up and make you feel like an alien or a ghost or something inhumanly monstrous when you are not.

Dazai's consistent failures to live up to his own and others' standards of humanity become a lot more meaningful to me when he is... just a very screwed up guy who happens to be smart. Get what I mean?

Besides, The Book is already connected to a character here and that character is Atsushi!

I was not more brief about this... Oh well. Those are my thoughts. If you guys had the patience to read this whole thing - WOW! I'd love to know what you think!

Thank you for the question!