#hit HARD like OOF

[riseandfallofsecunit]

I felt as if I were stuck between two futures, even though I had already made the decision to live in one of them.

[trafficlightsarethenewkickass]

So I've been reading a lot of fics where Tim thinks he's just a business partner instead of a family member, and while I love those fics it's so much angstier if he does believe he's family. Maybe he has absent parents, maybe he has bad parents, but I think either way he believes in love and family as good, precious things. Things he doesn't really understand.

(This got really long and very sad.)

So Tim reasons like this: Bruce is dad-shaped, when he's not grieving. So it's okay if he hurts Tim while he's grieving, because he'll love him later. His sixteenth birthday was just a test to make sure Tim can stay safe. It was love.

When Jason breaks into the Tower, Tim doesn't think he's mad at him for stealing his job. He isn't really listening, he's thinking You're my brother? Nice to meet you. He's thinking You love through pain? I can take pain.

When Damian tries to kill him, Tim thinks he loves like Jason, and sure, Jason gave him injuries that still hurt sometimes, and Damian prefers to make him fall which has terrified him since he watched the Grayson's fall. But it's okay, it's love. He knows it's love, because they're family.

And then Bruce 'dies' and Tim finds a pattern, and he tells Dick. The brother who loved in a way that's... softer. A way that wasn't scary or painful. And Dick doesn't believe him.

But that's love, right?

Because they're family, so this disbelief must be some type of love, way of caring, connection.

And then Damian comes out as Robin, and Tim finally listens when he's called an interloper. A thief. A charity case.

And Dick wants him to be Nightwing to Dick's Batman, when years ago he told Tim Nightwing would never belong to Batman.

Disbelief isn't love, it's part of something else.

So Tim goes away, and he rescues Bruce, and Dick catches him as he falls out a WE window. And the family is mending, so they want Tim back. And Tim accepts because there's no disbelief. So the love must be back.

But Jason and Damian stop hurting him physically. And Bruce doesn't test him. And Dick barely even asks him questions now, as if stopping opportunIties to disbelieve (he's actually just overcompensating by believing literally everything Tim says, including 15-energy-drinks-by-11-am Tim).

And Tim doesn't understand, because they're family. And his family doesn't love him like this.

Cue breakdown and tearful laying-out of his evidence that they don't love him anymore. Everyone else is horrified because yes we love you, but that wasn't love please tell me you understand-

[gayvecchio]

Frannie, you are in over your head. Meaning? Meaning, guys like him don't marry girls like you. That's fairy tale. And girls like you get hurt, and guys like him don't even know it, and that's life.

[bisexualrapline]

like i know we joke about yoongi being a rich bitch lecturing us all abt capitalism and it IS funny but only so far as you don’t listen to anything he says about his work and how it makes him feel. it’s such a theme in bangtan’s and especially rap line’s music generally; that, like, almost disgust with their own ambition because success in music DOES mean fame and riches. whether they like it or not, that’s how the world and the industry is structured. of course they benefit from that and i think they’re well aware but it’s possible for them to benefit from it AND for it to cause them harm. both truths can coexist. and i’m so glad that they talk about it so openly because it’s so important. yoongi saying in the doc “it would be so much easier if i was just a producer” because then he could just collect his check behind the scenes and move on. he never wanted fame, he never wanted to be obscenely rich - he just wanted enough for a meal AND a bus ticket home. the dreams of riches and fame came after bangtan became his dream, for better or for worse. idk idk idk i can’t be articulate about anything at the moment because i’m still processing but just. bangtan is so important. they’re everything to me. and they always will be

[taamlok]

taash worrying that being nonbinary would mess things up with muireann punched me in the face

[hauntingblue]

ARCANE DAY

Episode 4 and 5 in the tags and:

SALO BEING A VIKTOS FOLLOWER??? CRAZY. ALSO BOTH VIKTOR MISSING JAYCE AJDHSKSJ also cait has kinda calmed down... and I am sure she misses vi so I KNOW this is going to happen to her soon.... we aren't getting much of her feelings yet... she's still too onto Jinx to catch up on where ambessa is going...

DID JAYCE JUST KILL SALO??? WHAT HAPPENED IN THERE

Also vander not recognizing vi at first until she gives up fighting.... incredible ALSO vander and silco being miners and vi wearing her gauntlets that were initially thought out for miners.... damn

This is my favourite episode so far....

Episode 6 here:

Sky really being there..... of course she is....

Ambessa training caitlyn.... of course thats her new daughter akdjskms Tunnels in your eyes.... GIRL!!!!!!! THAT'S WHAT YOU DON'T NEED RIGHT NOW also the guy outside is a mage... ambessa is such a hypocrite

Vi and Jinx vs ambessa and cait.... this was always about class war don't get it twisted SINGED!!! TRAITOR!!!!

ARE THEY GOING TO SEE VIKTOR???? I looove how viktors touch on their faces leave "scars" so recognizable

Did isha just take the gem from vi's gauntlets??? Omg I wasn't expecting viktor to build a hippie commune to be honest omg he looks so good.... with the blonde underhairs.... and I do believe that's the same blanket....

And of course viktor knows who vander is.... nvm he diesnt know omg viktor asking for Powder.....

We are getting viktor horsegirl montage.... omg the vander momtage I can't..... omg they wanna stay.... singed is gonna fuck all this up NOOOOO 😭😭😭 they are already there I am going to kms

CAITLYN STOP THIS MADESSS!!! ✋️ CAITLYN!!!!! VI KILL THIS MAN!!! OMG CAITLYN...... mongoose... yeah.... and fuck you too.... CUPCAKE!!!! ABOUT TIME!!!! CAITLYN I SAID STOP THIS MADNESS WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!!! And jayce too 😭😭😭 we're never making it out of the fissures

It's such a shame the spit on here won't work like on challengers.... one can only pray I guess

Jinx experiencing the "there's nothing more undoing as a daughter" moment.... incredible

"Your absence provided a vacuum I was able to fill" TO VI???? I KNEW THAT HAND HOLDING IN THE COMMANDER SCENE WAS SUS AKDHKASJ maddie exists and ambessa knows that and still.... it was not filling her mother's void...

YES CAITLYN!!! YES!!!!! VI is so hot I am distracted... ambessa was right.... now what the fuck will jayce fuck up??? Thats the question... NOT ANOTHER CHILD!!! jayce is a menace... the guys smiling at jayce are viktor... maybe the child even....

JINX KILL THAT MAN!!! NVM VANDER KILL THAT MAN!!! JAYCE YOU FUCKING MORON!!!!! JAYCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WHEN I GET YOU JAAAYCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Isha what are you going to do omg 😭😭 did she kill vander... another powder... my god another week...

That was such a good fucking episode too.... and caitlyn didn't go insane when finding Jinx that is a step forwards but viktor can't be dead... no fucking way... he was giving himself away for the people and he was going to finally die by saving vander and look at what we got... no wonder viktor hates his guts. Jayce you were so good in act one.... what happened..... alright. Christ.... another week....

[necromatador]

Me, watching the Wisdom Saga livestream, with the dawning realization that the diagetic backing vocals of the crew are going to be replaced with diagetic backing vocals of the suitors in most if not all of the future songs:

[lovefortayley]

"I said I'd never think I wasn't better alone

Can't change the weather, might not be forever

But if it's forever, it's even better"

BIRDS OF A FEATHER, Billie Eilish

[moongothic]

You know, S-Crocodile has the potential to be an interesting addendum for Crocodad bc Crocodile just learned that his son is alive, and then two years after that, boom: clone Lunarian baby (who's also technically kinda sorta Luffy's half-brother?). The thing is, even if Crocodile bridges the gap between him and Luffy, Luffy's not the baby boy that Crocodile lost so long ago. He can take care of himself, has an entire crew to lead, and they may not see each other except for rare occasions. Crocodile didn't get to raise Luffy and will never get that time back. But S-Crocodile is a still a child who will likely have zero clue what to do without the programming and, since baby crocodiles are famous for loudly calling out for their mothers, may be desperate for a parental figure.

S-Crocodile is not a replacement for Luffy by any means, but more like a second kid had later in life who Crocodile was never expecting but who gives him the chance to parent in a way that he couldn't before.

See this is a much sweeter idea than me being like "what if Crocodile dies without getting to really experience being loved by his family/a community and have people care about him and so instead Luffy/other people end up projecting those feelings onto S-Croc and make sure he gets the love and community Crocodile never got to have"

Everytime I think about the lost time Crocodad implies I just die a little inside. Like Dragon might not have gotten to be with his son either, but at least he got to spy on Luffy on occassion, at least he got to check on him from afar and see him, know how he was doing, at least he knew Luffy's name. Crocodile didn't get any of that, and never will. Like you said, that time has been lost, and this hourglass can't be turned back and reset.

What is interesting though is that the Seraphim are supposed to have the personality traits of the OGs. Crocodile is quite independent, so I feel like S-Croc should be (or at least want to be, so he can appear strong etc) independent too, right? So S-Croc might want to be kind of a lone wolf, even if deep down he was sad due to his loneliness?

What's more though is that indeed, we don't know if S-Croc is pre-T or male (since he was made from post-T Croc DNA, and we don't know if Iva-chan's HRT affects DNA/those changes applied to the Seraphim). 'Cause if S-Croc is pre-T, Crocodile should know and understand how dysphoria is gonna hit S-Croc as he gets older (which is gonna be soon, since the Seraphim age faster). And like. I could see Crocodile just feeling bad for his Mini-Me because of that. I could imagine Crocodile just dragging S-Croc to Iva-chan (if there's an opportunity for it) and get that clone some T, spare him from going through the wrong puberty etc.

Point is, I feel like if Crocodile did somehow end up taking care of his Mini-Me, it might not be because S-Croc expressed a need for it. But it might be because Crocodile would be forced to reflect on his own feelings, knowing and understanding full-well how S-Croc would feel (be it about gender or loneliness), and just. Let the Dad Instincts take over, regardless of if the Seraphim likes it or not?

[scribefindegil]

i'm about halfway through but thus far it feels like the ethos of S4 of TNG is "You know what this starship needs? A personalized torment nexus for every one of her crew members!"

[sky-ivylight]

okayokayokay... hear me out. Barbie Fairytopia AU where everything is the same, except the necklace the Enchantress gave Elina didn't give her wings, she instead got the power of Magic Footsteps.

[ID: a digital art sketch of the characters Dandelion and Elina from Barbie Fairytopia running/flying through a field of flowers. Dandelion is a slender fairy with long pigtails, a skirt made of dandelion fluff and petals, and pixie wings fluttering behind her, orange and white sparkles trailing behind her as she flies excitedly by Elina. Elina is a taller, likewise slender fairy but, diverging from canon, she doesn't have wings and is instead running on glittering, magical, platforms that appear wherever she steps, while Dandelion flies beside her. She's wearing a dress with a layered, rose-petal skirt, with a sleeveless top with two petal-like decorations that trail off her shoulders. Her hair is in a low bun. The two are looking at each other and smiling. /END ID]

[jackass-jones]

Honestly though I think it’s really a bad sign when I look at Shin Tsukimi and literally feel like he’s a self insert 😩

[scrambledslut]

FRANCISCO MORALES PLEASE LET ME HAVE YOUR BABIES🗣🗣🗣🗣

[marimeeko]

Can I just.... for one minute, take this journey with me:

Ok imagine. IMAGINE the breakdown, if Katsuki Comes back, escapes his post-resuscitation care via Mirio and BJ, finds Izuku, helps Izuku defeat Shigaraki in whatever way he is able to...but Izuku takes a lot of damage in the process...

IMAGINE THE BREAKDOWN that Katsuki would have, Izuku collapses close to death, (maybe, hopefully spills some guts about his feelings to him) and loses consciousness, and it's not really clear if he's ok or going to make it, and for all intents and purposes, Katsuki thinks that this could very well be Izukus death....

Imagine him LOSING IT because how fucking CRUEL for he himself to die only to be brought back, and for Izuku to ACTUALLY DIE. HOW UNFAIR. He doesn't deserve that kindness from the Universe and from Edgeshot if Izuku is lost for real.

"Why are you still asleep when I'm wide awake" from the hospital scene, but SO MUCH MORE EMOTIONAL DAMAGE.

Screaming, crying, throwing up.

Imagine him just screaming, begging someone to help him like he was helped, to SAVE IZUKU Instead, yelling as if to be yelling at death itself, to take him back in Izukus place. That he would go back into that void, if it meant Izuku would be ok.

This would be so tragic but so damn POTENT MY GOD

...hopefully Katsuki passes out just as help is arriving and he knows nothing else until he wakes up in the hospital again but with someone's scarred hand warm in his own and squeezing so gently....

[kingxlionhart]

ough. i have thoughts on my rufus. i don't typically go into my thoughts on him/explore his character, typically just writing silly things or more lighthearted plotlines, but like... i really have thoughts.

it's pretty long. so yeet. a lot of speculation/kind of rambly, this is a post of me getting ideas in one spot. i'll probably expand on things later! but yeah.

potentially triggering content -- talk of abuse, neglect

like... yeah. his father wasn't around like he should have been, even had rufus in a separate house + had others raising rufus FOR HIM after rufus' mom left, but the fact that he (and im sure others) groomed rufus into taking over as president from an early age. while even if there was that chance that it could've gone to lazard instead, that's all rufus was ever going to be. even if he got to work other jobs before that, he never had a choice in what he got to do. with some of his experiences in shinra, he's very aware of how bad the place is. there's a resigned acceptance as he takes over, it's his responsibility. if he doesn't. someone worse will. he has to scramble to fix his father's mistakes.

the abuse and neglect. his father was not a stellar father, and maybe it's because reginald wasn't exactly shown how to be a good dad, but it doesn't matter. he was a bad father to rufus, he hurt his kid. it's physical and mental abuse -- leaving rufus with injuries he often had to hide. he got very good at relocating dislocated body parts. as well, ignoring and dismissing rufus' feelings. telling rufus to toughen up, not even trying to validate rufus' feelings and generally pushing rufus into the idea that maybe it was just rufus' fault. more things here, obvious signs of neglect and abuse, but it deeply affected rufus. he has severe trust issues, can't form or maintain new relationships, and so on. there's a long list. it's bad.

hypervigilance -- a result of trauma. constantly on edge, assessing threats around him. major trust issues, and mild people pleasing habits (these died very fast, but are pretty bad with the people he's close to). struggling with his own needs and suppressing parts of himself to avoid conflict.

his avoidant behavior may also be a result of his hypervigilance but im putting it separately because i DO want to look into this and explore options because i have mixed feelings. it might not be avoidant behavior. but the note is here for me.

the lack of autonomy -- procedures he didn't consent to. experiments in the lab. choices being made for rufus even though he is perfectly capable of making choices for himself. he's very protective of himself as an adult.

[foxgloveinspace]

Dying to know if you’ve listened to Vaxis II yet!

I’d love to know your thoughts if you have 🫶🏼

I hope you’ve had a splendid weekend!

I haven’t had the time sadly😭 I’ve been In Recovery™️ today from the overstimulating weekend I had (fun times, a lot of Car Time which I love, but I am exhausted now🫠). I’m planning on listening tomorrow I think, I’ll be home alone, and I can use the big tv with the good speaker that when I turn it up loud can be heard from the drive way!!

Edit, oops: I hope your weekend was really good too! 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤