#his name is Bear

[mugloversonly]

I Don’t Need to be Fixed

This is for week two of @steddiesmuttyseptember Prompts: soft and slow | bruise | Rating: E | CW: rape/non con (not between main pair), use of the T slur, misgendering, misgendering of self, mentions of corrective sex. | All tags on AO3 there is a scene of the non con that can be skipped. It will be marked by !!!!! You can pick the story back up at the second !!!!!

AO3 link

Eddie’s been acting strange for the past few weeks. One Sunday when he came home from work, he seemed off. He usually slammed the door open when he came in to alert Steve to his presence, but recently he creaked it open slowly, sliding in, and into the bathroom. He took a shower like normal, but instead of coming out naked to flash Steve (something he’s done since his top surgery), he wrapped the towel around himself tightly under his arms and practically sprinted to the bedroom. When he came out, he was wearing a big hoodie with the hood pulled up and a pair of Steve’s baggy sweatpants.

Today it’s been nearly six weeks and he’s still acting strange, repeating that same behavior after every shift. Even on his days off, he was still wrapped up, and when Steve made a move he flinched back hard. When he asked, Eddie always said he was fine just tired. He was trying not to spiral, but it was like his boyfriend was hiding from him, what could it mean? Was it the upside down? Was he cheating? Steve shook his head, he knew Eddie would say if it was the upside down and he wouldn’t cheat.

“Babe? You doing okay?” Steve asked as Eddie got ready to leave for work.

He nodded once before he left throwing a quick, “bye, love you” over his shoulder. That couldn’t be good.

About an hour later, the phone rang but before Steve could answer it it went to voicemail. “This message is for Eddie Munson. This is the free health clinic, we have his test results in.” The message went on, but Steve didn’t hear anything else.

~~~

Eddie sighed as the current patron he was serving finally moved from the bar. He could feel his energy draining. He loved this job, he did, but he’d be lying if he said it was perfect. Things were wonderful until a few weeks ago.

As he was ruminating on it, the problem customer in his thoughts walked up. “Hey there, beautiful.” Eddie stepped back and without saying a word went over to the other bartender of the night.

“Jeff, can you take this one?” Eddie said pleadingly. He never asked Jeff to take his customers unless something was really wrong.

“I’ll be right with you sir.” Jeff called to the man whose eyes were trained on Eddie.

“Did I make you feel better girlie?” the man asked. Eddie swallowed his fear, turning away with disgust. Jeff’s eyes were huge as he looked at Eddie.

“I’m going to get the bouncer.” He quickly ducked out from behind the bar and practically sprinted to the bouncer.

“Hey Bear? That guy I told you about, he’s talking to Jeff.” Bear didn’t need him to say anything else, he simply walked behind the man and started dragging him out.

“Hey! I’m a paying customer!” The man screamed.

“Not anymore. Now you’re banned.” Bear said calmly.

“Because of that fucking Tranny?!” Bear stopped suddenly. He grabbed the man by the shoulders and threw him to the ground.

“Apologize. Now, or you walk out of here with a broken nose.” The man sneered and spit towards Eddie. “Okay.” Bear said before flipping the man onto his stomach. He slammed his face into the bar floor twice. He went to do it a third time when Eddie spoke up.

“That’s enough Bear. I just want him gone.” The bouncer stood the man up and frog marched him out all the while telling him he’d put up his picture to get him banned permanently.

Eddie took a deep breath and turned back to the bar. Chrissy the manager stopped him, “that was intense. Do you want to go home?” Eddie glanced around at the patrons and everyone was staring. He nodded, as he walked into the back to get his things. Chrissy promised he’d still get paid for the night and the police would be contacted. She took over the bar so Jeff could drive Eddie home since he walked and they didn’t know if the guy was hanging around.

Back at home, he sat in Jeff’s car outside the small house he and Steve shared. He stepped out and waved at Jeff once he got inside. He really needed to talk to Steve about what happened, but he was scared this would be it. His fears were nearly confirmed when he entered the house quietly to find Steve sitting on the couch with a bag packed. “Stevie?” He whispered.

“You got a message Eds.” He replied monotone. Eddie walked to the tape machine, hitting play with confusion.

“This message is for Eddie Munson. This is the free health clinic, we have his test results in. They have all came back negative, have a nice day.” The tape beeped. Eddie sunk to his knees, tears of relief streaming down his face. He moved until he was sitting with his knees against his chest and his arms were wrapped around them.

“Thank god.” He whispered over and over as he rocked back and forth. Steve’s voice cut through his small breakdown.

“When were you going to tell me?” His whispered. Eddie wiped his eyes, Steve’s tone confused him.

“Do you listen to my message?” Eddie asked angrily.

“Not on purpose. When were you going to tell me?” Steve repeated.

“When I got the results back.” He replied quietly. Steve stood and stalked over to him.

“Get up,” he snarled. Eddie just looked at him so Steve reached down and yanked him to his feet by his arm. “I said get up!”

“Ouch! You’re hurting me.” Eddie said yanking his arm out of the hold.

“Were you going to tell me if they were positive so I could get checked too?” Steve asked. Eddie shook his head.

“You wouldn’t have needed to, I’ve been keeping my distance, just in case.” Eddie said quietly. He isn’t sure how Steve figured it out, but he was even more unsure of his anger.

“Is that why you’ve been avoiding me and shying away when I try to touch you?” Eddie nodded, the fear was clear in his eyes but Steve didn’t care right now. “I’m going to Robin’s” Steve huffed as he pushed Eddie away. Eddie felt himself crumble.

“You won’t even listen?” He cried. Steve stomped to the couch.

“I don’t want all the gory details no.” He said, his full mean girl coming out.

“Am I disgusting to you now?” He whispered, hugging himself.

“Kinda” Steve grabbed his bag and went to the front door. Eddie couldn’t take this. Why did Steve get to be angry about this when all Eddie felt was pain? Why was he angry at Eddie? Maybe it really was Eddie’s fault? He collapsed to the floor.

“Just a dumb Tranny, who got what he deserved right?” He sobbed out. Steve opened the door, but paused at that. “Something to fix him. But now, he’s damaged goods. Even the man who promised to love him no matter what hates him. But don’t worry, she’s fixed now.” Steve turned around to see Eddie staring at him, his eyes were blank, empty, and cold, even as the tears continued. “Back to her old self.”

“Eddie, what happened?” Steve asked softly, his blood frozen in his veins. “Why are you talking about yourself like that?”

“Don’t worry, Steve. I wouldn’t want to make you listen to the gory details. Have fun at Robin’s. I’ll be gone by morning” Eddie stood and sprinted to the bathroom, locking himself inside. Once there he climbed into the tub and turned on the freezing water, fully dressed. Once he was chilled all the way, he turned the water to scalding. He’d been doing this after work for the past few weeks to try to shock his system back to normal, it hasn’t really been working, but he didn’t know what else to do. The hot water burned his freezing skin but it gives him something to focus on, it’s then that there is a knock on the bathroom door.

“Eddie?” Steve called. Eddie rolled his eyes. After all the shit he just said, he has the gall to sound so concerned?

“Fuck off!” He shouted but Steve just knocked again.

“Please, baby. Let me in?” Eddie huffed, he could tell he wasn’t going to go away. He climbed out of the shower, not worrying about all the water he was getting all over the floor, and unlocked the door. He waited until he was safely back in the spray before giving the okay. The door opened slowly, cautiously, like Steve wasn’t sure what he’d see on the other side. Their eyes met and Eddie got the pleasure of watching Steve’s face frozen in shock as he took in the scene. “Can we get you out of the tub and into bed so we can talk?” Steve asked. Eddie hesitated before nodding. Steve grabbed a towel and turned off the water. He attempted to grab Eddie again but he flinched back hard enough to slam into the tile wall behind him. Steve raised his hand in surrender before handing the towel over and holding his hand out in offer.

Eddie looked at his hand as he wrapped the towel about himself, but he didn’t take it. Steve followed him into the room, sat on the bed, and stared expectantly at Eddie, who stood there in his wet clothes. “Can..can you uh turn around?” Eddie asked quietly. Steve’s heart broke but he did as he was asked. “Okay, you’re good.” He said a few minutes later. He’d pulled on his biggest hoodie and sweatpants that would hold him but also cloak his body, practically hiding it from view. He curled up on the bed as far away from Steve as he could, keeping his eyes on his knees to avoid Steve’s heartbroken face. The room was quiet for a long time before either of them spoke.

“I’m sorry I grabbed you like that earlier Eddie. I didn’t mean to hurt you.” Steve broke the silence. Eddie scoffed and rolled his eyes.

“Yes you did. You just thought you were hurting a cheater.” He mumbled the last part. The word cheater hung heavy. “You didn’t even let me explain. You just...decided that I wasn’t worth it.” Steve stared at Eddie. “You wanna know what happened Steve? You wanna know why the free clinic called?”

~~~

Steve looked at this broken man and felt a pang in his heart. He had huge bags under his eyes and his lips were still a little blue. Steve knew something had been going on, but now he was even more unsure about it. “If you want to share, Eddie.” Eddie scoffed. Steve could understand that, “I promise, I know you didn’t cheat, I won’t leave unless you want me to, tell me if you want, not because you think it’s the only way I’ll stay.” After what he just witnessed he’s willing to go on a little faith. After a brief moment of hesitation, Eddie finally spoke.

“I really was going to tell you once I got the results in.” Eddie promised. “You remember that guy at work a month and a half ago?” Eddie asked. Steve did remember, he was an older guy who made gross comments to the wait staff and hit on Eddie. He nodded. Eddie held out his hand for Steve to take, he did and Eddie continued. “He came back a week or so later.”

!!!!!

Eddie and Chrissy were working close that night. The bar was packed but the rude man from the week before stood out. He kept hitting on Eddie and Chrissy all night and he stayed until Bear kicked him out. When the two bartenders were ready, Bear offered to walk them to their cars. Since Eddie tended to walk to work, he let himself be escorted to the end of the block.

He didn’t live far, only a mile or two, but about half way there he felt like he was being watched. When he glanced over his shoulder he saw a few people milling around and assumed it was from them. He didn’t see the guy moving closer to him until it was too late. When he turned the corner, the guy pushed him into the alley and forced his chest into the bricks.

“Hey what the fuck?” Eddie yelled but the man shoved something into his mouth. Eddie froze for a moment when he recognized the man from the club. They thought he left, but he must have been hiding somewhere.

Eddie tried to struggle but the man was stronger and held his wrists behind his back with one hand. With the other he wrapped around Eddie’s waist and undid the button of his jeans before shoving his hand inside. ��So the rumors were true huh?” The man whispered in his ear, it sent a shiver of fear and disgust up Eddie’s spine.

Eddie screamed against the gag, thrashed his body, but the man ignored him. He removed his hand for a moment to yank Eddie’s head back and slam it into the wall making his vision fuzzy. The man yanked down Eddie’s pants and boxers to his knees, shoved his own down, and forced Eddie’s legs apart.

He did his best to fight back, but with the blow to the head and his restricted airflow from the gag, he wasn’t able to do much. The man shoved his dick inside Eddie’s pussy but growled angrily when he found he wasn’t wet. “My dick not good enough for you tranny?” He snarled. “Don’t you worry your pretty little head girlie, I’ll show you what it’s like to be with a real man and you’ll be all fixed.”

He shoved against Eddie again who began silently crying. The tears dripped steadily down his face and off his chin, the man scoffed and licked at them. “Don’t cry, I’m just healing you.” Eddie didn’t know what to do. He tried thrashing again but that only seemed to make the man harder. He did the only thing he could and just shut down. Emptied his mind, hid in the same place he used to when his dad would hurt him.

It was finally over when the man’s hips sped up slamming his own into the brick wall no doubt leaving bruises. He had the decency to pull out before cuming on the alley floor. He pat Eddie once on the shoulder. “You’ll be all better soon girlie.” He said before he pulled his pants back up and walked out of the alley. Eddie stayed frozen against the wall for a minute before spitting out the fabric in his mouth and fixing his clothing. His hands shook, he felt his body draining of any energy but he knew he needed to get home.

!!!!!

When Eddie finished speaking, his face was wet as tears had been steadily streaming down his face. Steve lifted his free hand and reached toward Eddie but paused until he nodded his permission. He gently wiped the tears from his boyfriend’s face but it wasn’t until Eddie did the same that he realized he was crying too.

“Baby,” Steve whispered. “I wish you told me.” Eddie’s eyes closed and he hung his head.

“I know. I’m sorry.” He was quiet, if Steve wasn’t sitting so close he wouldn’t have heard him. “I’m sorry I let it happen.” Steve leaned back to look into Eddie’s eyes.

“It’s not your fault, my love.” Steve whispered.

“Yes it is! I tried to fight but I couldn’t. If I wasn’t… I’m sorry, Steve.” Steve’s heart broke for his boyfriend. He opened his arms in offering, nearly falling off the bed when Eddie launched himself into him, apologies pouring out of him. Steve couldn’t take him feeling like this.

“Hey, it’s not your fault baby boy.” Steve swore. “You didn’t ask for it, you didn’t do anything wrong. I’m sorry I didn’t listen the first time.” He held tight to Eddie as his cries shook his body. “You’re not wrong, you don’t need to be fixed.”

Steve continued his reassurances as Eddie’s sobs quieted into soft sniffles. “You want to know the worst part of all of this?” Eddie asked wetly. Without waiting for Steve to respond he continued, “I feel like my body isn’t mine anymore.” Steve wanted to find that guy and punch his face in for hurting Eddie. He finally got to a point where he felt like himself, just for this guy to ruin it?

“What can I do? How can we make it feel like yours again?” Steve asked.

“I have an idea, it might seem a little out there” Eddie hesitated. “Can we...have sex?”

“Are you sure?” Steve asked.

“Yes.” Eddie confirmed. Steve nodded in thought for a moment.

“Okay, but if you start getting uncomfortable we stop, okay?” Eddie nodded.

~~~

“Can I ask? How will this help?” Steve asked as he stood.

Eddie stood too and took off his shirt. “This time it’s my choice. You know?” Steve agreed and went to take off his own shirt but Eddie stopped him. “Can I do it?” When Steve nodded, Eddie pulled him away from the bed and undressed him slowly.

He kissed his lips softly before unbuttoning both of their jeans and shoving them down. When they both stood naked in front of each other, he paused. “Can we use the strap tonight?” Eddie asked shyly. They normally switched but he didn’t feel ready to bottom right now. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever be ready again.

“Of course, whatever you need.” Steve promised. While Eddie made his way to the closet to get his harness on, Steve climbed on the bed, grabbing the lube and a condom. Eddie slid his little bullet inside the harness and tucked the controller into the waist band, right next to the lube plunger.

“Oh, gonna cum in me tonight baby?” Steve asked when he saw which dildo Eddie was wearing. It was average sized, something they used when they weren’t in a full scene. Eddie smiled softly as Steve threw the condom back in the drawer. Eddie climbed onto the bed, leaned over, and kissed Steve chastely. It quickly deepened as he licked into the other man’s mouth, softly stroking Steve’s with his own. “God you’re so handsome.” Steve groaned.

Eddie blushed and slid his hand down Steve’s chest, rubbed and twisted his left nipple until he moaned, then did the same to the right. Without separating their lips, he gripped Steve’s cock softly, stroking it to full hardness. Steve kept his hands on the bed until Eddie took his wrists and put them on his hips.

“Touch me Stevie.” He whispered against his lips. Steve slid his hands up Eddie’s sides then around to his chest.

“Can I jerk you off?” He asked quietly. Eddie nodded and he didn’t waste a second slipping his thumb and forefinger into the harness to grasp his cock. He stroked up and down before pausing with his middle finger hovering over the man’s cunt. “Can I touch you there?” Eddie hesitated for a moment but eventually nodded. He slid his finger through the wetness seeping from him but when he went to insert his finger inside, Eddie locked up.

“Stop!” Eddie yelled. His hands and lips stopped, and Steve pulled his hand back.

“Sorry.” Eddie whispered as his body shook. “I don’t know why I can’t…” he choked up. Steve gently stroked Eddie’s back.

“It’s okay baby, no apologies okay? If you want to stop we can” Eddie whimpered and shook his head. “If you want to keep going we can, I just won’t finger you okay?” Steve promised.

Eddie kissed him softly again. “Thank you. Can I get you ready?” He asked. Steve went to flip himself over but Eddie stopped him. “I need to be able to see you, is that okay?” Steve knew it would hurt a bit more than normal, but the trust Eddie placed in him over road that fear. He grabbed the bottle of lube and pressed it into Eddie’s hand.

Eddie felt almost shy when he poured lube on his hand, rubbing his fingers together to warm it up. They’ve done this hundreds of times by now, but every time felt like the first time. He kissed down Steve’s neck, sucking bruises into the skin as he slid a finger inside. When he didn’t meet any resistance, he moaned softly. He thrust his finger a few times before adding a second, quickly followed by a third.

“Eddie, baby. I’m ready, please.” Steve begged. Eddie smirked, twisted his fingers until Steve screamed.

“I found it, sweetheart?” Eddie asked, already knowing the answer, especially when he hit that spot again and again until Steve clenched around his fingers. Feeling mean, Eddie stopped moving, dangling Steve’s release in front of him like a carrot. He sat back on his heels, reveling in Steve’s betrayed glare. “What’s a matter baby?” He asked innocently.

“I need you Eds. Get in me before I explode!” Steve whined.

“Your wish,” Eddie began as he lined up, “is my command.” He thrust his hips forward sinking to the hilt in one motion. Steve shook as he tried to adjust, but Eddie wouldn’t let him. He thrust deeply and slowly, dragging his strap out inch by agonizing inch, making sure to hit Steve’s prostate on every inward push. He flipped the bullet vibrator on, moaning as it kicked into gear.

“Harder baby.” Steve begged, “please sir, give it to me.” The honorific always sent Eddie hurtling toward the edge. He bit harshly into Steve’s shoulder as he began pounding into him. The vibe pushed against his cock and the base of Steve’s making them both shudder.

“Feel good, doll?” Eddie asked, not waiting for Steve’s answer before his hand was back around his cock. Steve wailed as he was jerked quickly, the difference between Eddie’s hips and hand driving him insane.

“I’m close baby. I’m so fucking close.” Steve panted, wrapping his hand around Eddie’s neck and pulling him down for a kiss. He began lifting his hips to meet his boyfriend’s thrust for thrust, incidentally pinning the vibe against his cock. Eddie threw his head back and grabbed the plunger in his waist band.

“Cum for me, sweetheart. Together” Eddie growled into his ear. That’s all it took for Steve. He released hot ropes of cum all over the both of them at the same time Eddie pushed the plunger. The body temp lube filled his ass while Eddie shook as he came. He worked them through it before he collapsed onto his boyfriend.

After when they were all clean, the sheets were changed, and they were cuddling, Eddie kissed one of Steve’s bruises. “Thank you.” He whispered. Steve smiled, grabbed Eddie’s chin, tilted his head up, and kissed him gently.

“No need to thank me. You’re my boyfriend.” Eddie sighed happily. Steve’s gentle words and touches helped him feel like himself.

“And don’t you ever forget it.” Steve smiled cockily and pulled Eddie until he was on top of him.

“Wanna go again?” Eddie eagerly nodded and jumped off the bed to get his strap.

[pro-anomalocaris]

My dog has a habit of, when he's stressed, trying to eat his own foot. I don't mean lick it, I mean bite down and physically hurt himself level of 'I must eat the foot'. (No, we don't know why he does this. He just... does.)

My dad can get him to stop with one simple phrase: "No! What would the rabbi think?"

In conclusion, this dog is Jewish. Shabbat shalom.

[necroromantics]

Introducing yall to my dog in honour of this post

[telescopic-camera-nod]

my dog and cas If u even care

[lilybug-02]

Final Bug Fact:

The world NEEDS bugs. They keep the soil healthy, pollinate, control pests, and contribute to the worlds' ecosystem. By the end of the century, it is estimated 40% of insect species may go extinct due to habitat loss. Yes, that is very scary. But with even one beetle spared, one caterpillar rescued, and one Hollow Knight comic of all things, things will change. Because I know there's a lot more Dewi's out there than most people realize. Stay curious.

Thanks for going on this adventure with me. ♥︎

First || Prev // END... VOLUME 2 is Out.

Masterpost

Comic Thoughts and Pictures Below!

I wanted to put here how amazing and sweet everyone has been with this comic. I finished a 75 page comic in 3 MONTHS. I am at a loss for words. That sounds crazy and it IS crazy. But man was it fun. Even on days were I wasn't able to draw due to fatigue or business, I loved working on it from start to finish. And guess what!? This is my first ever FINISHED comic :D I'm so proud of myself. I know there's some things I want to change and the art is wonky in most places...... but I'm content to let it be. What an amazing summer adventure!

I'm hoping to post the full comic on another Comic website. I may or may not edit some of the art ^w^ So I'll let y'all know when I release it.

Interested in learning what you could do to help your local insects? This is the basic stuff. Maybe make some Insect Hotels if you have the time!!! And never forget to spread the word about bugs. They need our help just as any animal on earth.

Still Here? Well you can look in the tags for little lore dumps if ur looking for stuff like that ;)

[wtfsteveharrington]

something new | luca x reader

i was awoken from a dream last night

contents: requested size kink so luca is hung!! basically pwp, slight somnophilia if you squint, unprotected sex, spanking, lots of pet names from Luca, reader receiving fingering, dirty talk, semi-submissive reader vibes, pulling out for backshots but some cum play still whoops

a/n: used a photo of will bc it fit the vibe so well 🌝 can we, as a fandom, decide a last name for this man!! only semi proof read i fear pls ignore any mistakes. also no pronouns or real reader description used.

contents: 2.7k.

the climax right before morning's first light

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Your body feels heavy as it’s pulled from a deep sleep. 

There’s warm lips on your shoulder placing soft kisses along your skin, a hand kneading at your ass while you wake up. You hum into the quiet room while burying your face into the pillow desperately not ready to wake up. “S’everything okay?” 

Luca’s chuckling against you, sliding his calloused hand up the back of your thigh while you stay lying on your stomach. He looks down at the sight of you illuminated in the moonlight from his apartment window, soaking in every inch. His hand cups under the bottom of your behind, giving it a little jiggle for his own entertainment. 

“All’s fine, my love. Didn’t mean to wake you so early.”

You turn your head towards the nightstand and it takes a few blinks for your eyes to finally focus on the dim clock. 3:30 AM. Early enough for him to get up to shower, make tea, and leave out a small note of affection on the counter for when you wake up at a much more reasonable time. He typically doesn’t wake you, opting to shimmy out of the bed but not this morning. 

There’s lips on your neck now. “Was dreaming about you and had to make sure you were real.” His hand is sliding in between your thighs now, pulling them apart. Inches away from where you’re starting to crave him. You’re whining in the pillow now while arching your hips up towards his touch. He’s grinning against your skin and rocking himself towards your side. Luca’s hard and heavy against you. “Gonna go take care of this in the bathroom. Just needed a little touch of you before I go.” 

You’re shaking your head now, trying to unpin your arm that’s trapped between the two of you so you can find the waistband of his sweats slung low on his waist. “No, no. Don’t go.” The elastic is tight against your fingers as you slip your hand into his pants, fingertips brushing along his growing length which rewards you with a moan from your boyfriend. His hand gently slaps down on the flesh of your ass before he starts to pull away. You murmur out protests as you stretch your arms out straight ahead of you, fingers curling around the edge of the bed. There’s a rush of cold air as he pulls the blanket from your frame and tosses it to the empty side of the bed. 

He’s grabbing a pillow next and tapping his fingers against your side, grinning as you take the hint and lift your hips for him. “Just lay there, Darling. Let me take care of you.” Luca makes sure you’re comfortable. Taking his time to fluff the pillow just right. Running his wide hands down your back while still lazily waking up. The bed creaks under the two of you as he moves to kneel between your spread legs. He admires your stretched out form. The curve of your ass propped up and his for the taking. You’re wearing an oversized cliche t-shirt from the last trip you took together and this old pair of underwear with a half worn off print. Not the sexiest outfit to ever grace this bedroom to say the least and yet Luca doesn’t mind in the slightest. 

His thumbs slide along the seam of your underwear that’s stretched across your cheeks, warm hands sliding up your backside to your lower back to gently work on your relaxed body. He leans forward to reach up towards your shoulders, the length of him sliding against your ass and eliciting a moan from you. Luca’s taking advantage of this position to rut himself against you, the feeling of your soft body under him working him up even more than he thought was possible. 

“Always so good for me, aren’t you?” You’re nodding against the pillow, turning your head to the side to press a kiss against the hands that are now on your shoulders. “Only yours, Luca.” He’s groaning above you and there’s warm, open mouth kisses being pressed along your spine now. 

There’s a shuffling coming from behind you as Luca makes quick work of kicking his sweatpants off. You feel the warmth of his skin directly on the inside of your thighs now as he sits back up. He’s crooking fingers in the waistband of your underwear and finally, finally pulling them down your thighs and leaving you exposed to him. They’re stuck right above your knees - Both Luca kneeling between your legs and how far spread open you are making it impossible for them to go any lower. “Are you passionate about these?”

You barely shake your head no, because again they’re old and worn and you find it endearing he even asked, before the sound of them being ripped off of you fills the room causing you to gasp out. Luca haphazardly tosses them towards the trash can in the corner and gets to work pulling his own boxes down. You’re needy. Wiggling your hips through the air in slow movements to entice him. As if he needed anymore motivation. You follow his guidance and haphazardly make work taking off your shirt, balling it up and throwing it on his now empty side of the bed.

Since Luca’s doing all the work you allow yourself to stay, essentially, half asleep. Your eyes are still heavy and hooded and your body lax against the bed. He’s delivering one more small smack to the roundest part of your ass before his fingers find their way between your thighs. Normally he’d take more time teasing you, building you up. As much as he yearns to spend the whole day tangled in you, he does have to get to work soon. For now he’s going to be quick but he plans on taking his time with you again tonight. 

There’s fingers sliding up either side of your folds, a slow languid motion to get you used to his touch before his middle fingers slips in. You’re slackjaw against the pillow, letting out a stream of breathy whimpers you can’t control. Luca knows you. Knows every inch of you. So he’s using that knowledge to get you ready for him. His pointer finger slides into you while his thumb finds your clit at the same time. You’re wet, the scissoring and dragging motions Luca’s making causing a slick sound to come from between your thighs. 

“Luca, please.” He grins down at your backside, enjoying the view of his fingers working deep inside of you. “Always so greedy, aren’t you?” You respond by rocking your hips back against his hand and clenching down against his fingers which causes him to chuckle. “Alright, alright.” His hand slides out of you and smacks down against the back of your thigh. Your left behind wetness from his fingers attracts the cold air and causes goosebumps to rise. 

You secretly like when Luca spends a little less time stretching you out then he probably should. The way your boyfriend stretches you out as he first pushes in you has become a piece of heaven. There are nights he spends as long as you’ll allow eating you out and fingering you, toying with your pussy for his own enjoyment. Leaving his chin wet with you and a darken spot on the sheets until he fucks through how sloppy he’s turned you. 

Not tonight. You’re wet, yes. But you know there’s going to be a heavenly burning feeling coming your way. The amount of care your boyfriend puts into you making you comfortable enough to open yourself in that way. Knowing he’d stop the second you asked if needed. 

The head of his cock sits heavy against your entrance and you feel yourself desperately clenching around nothing. He’s pulling you from your train of thought and your body is buzzing in anticipation. The slap of the tip of him against your clit causes your body to jerk which prompts Luca to use his free hand to grip your hip, holding you in place. “Be good, yeah? Let me get us off before I gotta go. Can’t have you wet all day waiting for me to come back home to take care of you.” Luca lines himself up with your hole, sliding just the tip of himself in which pulls a moan from both of you. 

“Baby, please.” Pride swells in Luca’s chest as you start to beg. If he hadn’t been gripping your hips then you would have rolled them back to take more of his length in you. Instead he goes slow, allowing you to adjust to his girth inch by inch. Even after dating for this long, you still weren’t used to him yet. 

There’s a bit of drool coming from the corner of your still parted lips as Luca works his length in. Your boyfriend was well endowed to say the least. A good length, something you could still take to the back of your throat but not so long you couldn’t sink all the way down it. But his girth? That was unmatched. Thick, heavy, and all yours. 

“Feel so amazing, Darling. Was dreaming about this pussy spreading around me.” Luca jerks another inch in without warning, a squelching sound coming from you as the movement causes some wetness to drip out. You can’t form a thought when he’s got you like this. Your body is still relaxed against the bed as Luca stretches you out. 

It takes a moment for him to bottom out and all your mind can focus on is just how deep he feels inside of you. The sensation causes your breath to catch, pathetically letting out whatever whimper you can muster and allowing him to use you to his heart’s content. Luca gives your hip a little squeeze as a warning he’s going to start moving, giving you a second to accept what’s to come before the first roll of his hips hits. 

You’re a mess. Groggy still, already becoming cock drunk. It’s easy to do with him. “S’full, Luc. So, so full.” Even with his brows knitted in concentration as he tries not to instantly cum at the sight of your pussy stretched around him, he’s proud to get you this way. 

But God does the sight of you already have him close. 

Stretched out around him, filled to the max you could be. You look so beautiful like that. Luca fucks through all the wetness you give him, hips building a steady rhythm easily. His eyes flash over towards the clock and something about the pressure of a time constraint is making him a bit more feral than he expected. 

His pace quickens and you’re back to being reduced to a drooling mess under him. Moaning out an incoherent string of pleas, praise, and curses. You couldn’t repeat what’s coming from your mouth even if you tried. His heavy balls slap against your clit which each thrust and Luca’s grabbing your hips with both hands now to get a better grip on you. Fingertips digging in enough that bruises will be left as he starts to fuck into with a firm pace. 

“Such a perfect fuckin’ pussy. So wet for me, aren’t you? You’re gonna be sore all day now but you don’t care. Every step’s gonna remind you how good I fuck you.” 

Your head is spinning. 

You allow yourself to be fucked by Luca, hands gripping the edge of the bed as you desperately clutch anything within reach to keep yourself grounded. He’s… Brutal. Fucking you for his own pleasure in a way. He needed to get off and get off quick before work - But arrogantly knew how good you were for him. Knew that him using you like this would get you off too. 

One of his hands gripping your hip loses his grip and there’s another smack being delivered to the fat of your ass. He groans at the sight of you bouncing, the red mark already blooming from his hand. The burning of being stretched out is fading away and being replaced by the pure pleasure of your boyfriend wrecking your body. 

His hand is sliding up from your ass to press down on the small of your back, a comforting touch compared to the brutal pace of his hips. Long forgotten is the sleepy mask of morning, Luca just chasing after pleasure for the both of you now. You purposely flutter yourself around his length, trying to pull him closer as well. 

“Can you come for me, Darling? You can do that, can’t you? Wanna feel this pretty little pussy finish before I do.” You’re squeezing yourself tighter around him now, the soft pillowcase feeling rougher as your face continues to bounce against it. The room is getting hotter by the second around you two. 

Something about the combination of circumstances has you getting close to finishing far faster than normal. You catch yourself biting down on the pillow as Luca drags his nails down the soft skin of your back, his hips not losing pace as the all too familiar sensation starts to coil up deep inside of you. 

You’re crying out at the sensation, pussy tightening around him as your orgasm rocks through your body. Toe curling, back arching, clit throbbing orgasm. You collapse even further into the bed, a mess of breathless whimpers as Luca continues to fuck through your sensitive body. God you sound lewd with how wet you ended up. 

Luca’s quick to follow after watching you come undone around him.  

He’s moaning out your name, giving a few more pumps through your wetness before quickly pulling out. Stroking his soaked length to keep the sensation and then you feel warmth splattering along your ass and back as he cums on you. He’s breathless and whiney, teasing his own overstimulated cock behind you. Thumb swiping along his tip to collect the last droplets before wiping it in-between your folds and pressing it into you. 

As much as he loved cumming in you, he wanted to make sure he had time to get you cleaned up before he had to leave but he still couldn’t leave you without anything left inside of you. 

Luca drags you to the bathroom after he gives you a moment to collect yourself. Normally he’d take his time with aftercare but sadly he’s lacking just that - time. You use the restroom while he draws the two of you a shower and take a good look at yourself in the mirror while he corrects the water temperature. Healing hickies low on your chest, your hair looking crazy from the combination of sleeping and being wrecked. He’s got twenty minutes left before he runs out of time to make his breakfast but he refuses to leave you in a pile in the bed. 

He makes quick work of washing off your over sensitive body, letting you stand there and run your fingers along his chest, his arms, whatever inch of skin you can reach. “You’re so pretty.” 

Now after what just happened in the bedroom? You’d think nothing would phase him. 

But Luca’s cheeks are going bright red at the compliment. He cups your face with his soapy hands, bringing you two together for a kiss as a silent thank you. 

Luca gets you dried off and sends you back to bed with a pat on your ass. He’s rushing to get ready for work while you lay down in a lump on the bed. Towel tight around your body and the covers long forgotten. It takes a few minutes for him to emerge from the bathroom clothed and hair gelled but he can’t help laughing at the sight of you. You feel the towel being tugged away from your body, the previously discarded blanket being tucked around you and a kiss pressed to the top of your head. 

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

He leaves everything you need for your morning tea sitting on the counter before running out the door.

[lordsovorn]

dunmeshi inner voices but it's all actual strengths of the characters

Senshi: maintain a balanced diet, listen to your body and be mindful of where your food is coming from. Don't take more than you need from the ecosystem, but remember that to live means to take.

Chilchuck: get paid upfront, get a contract, always have ways to protect your interests in a job, unionize.

Marcille: maintain good hygiene, and take care of your hair and clothes - it's nice and it's worth it. Things in the handbook are there for a reason, but tools aren't moral.

Laios: know your weaknesses and your strengths, and those of your friends. Rely on them and make sure they can always rely on you.

Falin: it's always worth to try kindness first, and to keep a heavy blunt object on hand if that doesn't work out.

Izutsumi: search for your own goals. Be open to change.

Kabru: make your own judgments, and then update them, rather than fit everything you see to your expectations. Act on your beliefs and judgements.

Shuro: always keep the cops in mind, never trust the cops. Know how to balance pressure and politeness in diplomacy.

Namari: maintain a balance between your personal and group interests. Act on your strengths.

Hien: you're staggeringly pretty as is

P. S. Banger post. Here are verified collections of links where you can donate to: Ukraine Syria Palestine

Chilchuck says: Do what you can from where you are. Every action matters, every dollar counts.

[vaguely-concerned]

nothing makes me roll my eyes quite like people making a big deal out of lucanis being 'the magekiller' while mostly being perfectly chill with mages in his personal life as if that's some huge objective flaw in the writing. like yeah it's his professional specialization not his personality or strongly held ideological conviction or anything. mages are tricky to kill and he's real good at it. that's why they pay him the big bucks. it's like saying a pest exterminator can only do his job if he's motivated by a deep personal vendetta waged against the entirety of rodentkind. the fact that he genuinely treats assassination like his 9-5 is, y'know. half of the whole guy, and this tracks with that wonderfully.

(honestly it's so perfect that the reason he specialized in that is, literally and canonically, that caterina looked over the books and went 'huh. we should diversify our murder portfolio, there's an untapped market here' and assigned it to him. he didn't even get to choose his own murder major, his grandmother decided that for him largely for straightforward economic reasons. dunno what to tell you, crows gonna crow. they're just merchant princes with extra knives at the end of the day, that is exactly why they'd make a choice like that, they're providing a service not going on crusades, even though lucanis manages to carve out some personal satisfaction in taking down especially shitty targets within that. I'm sorry you guys didn't get your angsty enemies to lovers arc or whatever but please understand that that only existed in your head to begin with and also that what we actually get here is infinitely funnier and MUCH more interesting, once you actually engage with the text earnestly. ssssh I didn't say that)

[lunacias]

(Silence. CARPENTER tries to rally HAYWARD's spirits. She's afraid she's going to lose him.)

"All three of us - we can all go on living, Hayward. Just like you said."

[lisenberry]

Eddie, Captain, Joe, and Zach.

[mugloversonly]

The Revenant of You

Summary: At Dustin and Eleven's wedding, Eddie and Steve reunite after 10 years.

This fully finished and will be released weekly. There are 5 total chapters. AO3 link at the bottom.

Chapter 1: Steve

Steve and Abby stood hand in hand outside the church. His little girl was so excited to see her uncle Dusty again and watch him marry Auntie El, but Steve wasn’t ready to see Eddie again. He couldn’t do this.

He scoffed at himself. It had been nearly ten years since they last saw each other on the night of their break up. At the time, Corroded Coffin was on their first album tour, Steve was with them, and he watched as Eddie’s dreams of being a Rock Star became a reality. He was so proud of him, but he was resentful too. Why should Eddie get everything he ever wanted when Steve didn’t? Never mind that Steve wasn’t sure exactly what he wanted; it was about the principle.

But more than that, Steve was scared. Terrified Eddie would realize he could do much better than Steve and he’d break his heart. So, he resolved to break Eddie’s first. He picked a fight out of nowhere, screamed about how he hated being on the road, he wanted kids, and Eddie would never be able to give him that.

What Steve hadn’t anticipated was the Munson resolve. Eddie offered to quit. He’d quit the band, settle down where ever Steve wanted, and they’d have some little nuggets: adopted or surrogate, it didn’t matter as long as they stayed together, stayed married. Said he loved Steve and his life with him was more important than his dreams.

Eddie was so genuine, Steve knew he would have quit then and there, but he couldn’t live with the guilt. So he told the biggest lie of his life, your love isn’t enough, you’ll always be too much.

Eddie’s biggest insecurity, Steve’s ticket out. Or so he thought; but, here he was ten years later, nursing the bruised ego from his second divorce, and the broken heart from his first husband.

He shook his head, ducked into the last row, and did his best to hide. Normally, he’d be in the front row but Eddie was the best man. Steve tried not to be bitter about it. He’d known Dustin the longest...but thanks to Abby’s mom, his relationships with his friends weren’t as strong as they used to be; he didn’t even remember the last time he spoke to Robin.

As the ceremony started, he forgot about his worries as he watched Dustin take his place at the front of the church. He looked so handsome in his all black suit, even if he had a goofy pink bow tie on. But as the procession made their way down the aisle, the pink made sense. All the bridesmaids were in soft pink dresses with black accents, all the groomsmen in black suits, with pink accents. Different than Dustin’s like they all were allowed to choose what the accent was.

The maid of honor was of course Max, she was arm in arm with Eddie. Steve tried to keep his eyes on Max, but they drifted. Just to see what his accent was he whispered to himself. Pink ribbons were braided into his long hair, little bows at the end. It kind of pissed Steve off that he didn’t look stupid with his hair like that; he looked really cute.

Even though Steve was the reason they weren’t together anymore, he still hated Eddie a little, he wanted him to be miserable like him. Which was so shitty of him but if there was one thing Steve was still trying to unlearn, it was his level of pettiness.

Even as everyone stood to see the bride, his gaze never left Eddie’s form. Abby yanked on his arm finally pulling him away and toward Eleven. Her dress was a blush princess gown, she carried black daisies, her only jewelry was her smile. Her arm was wrapped in Hopper’s as they moved, her eyes never looked away from Dustin and his never moved from her.

He teared up as Dustin wiped his face. He remembered that feeling. Seeing the love of your life walk to you, looking as beautiful as ever. His first wedding was full of that heart stopping, lung filling, joy. He couldn’t help but look at Eddie again, hoping their eyes would meet. But no, he watched El with a sad smile, a few stray tears sliding down his face. Steve selfishly hoped he was thinking the same thing.

The reception was...exactly what he would expect from Eleven. So many candles and colors. Flowers everywhere, but there were touches of Dustin too. D20 candle holders were the centerpieces and the food was Dustin’s favorite: grilled salmon with a honey glaze.

Steve tried to engage with the people at his assigned table, but he wasn’t very enthused. The only people from Hawkins who weren’t in the bridal party were the parents and siblings of the kids-now adults- of the party. Somehow, exchanging parenting tips with Karen Wheeler was not on his wedding agenda. By the time dinner ended, Steve was ready to drown himself in champagne.

Then the speeches started...and he willed lighting to strike him. Max’s speech was beautiful. Anecdotes about their childhood spent together, omitting the monster stuff but Steve knew the truth. “I hope you and Dustin live a long and happy life together Ellie. And remember, if he breaks your heart, I’ll break his bones.” The room laughed but those who knew her, knew Max would do it.

Eddie was up next, Steve slumped down more in his chair. “Dustin I hope you know how lucky you are” he began with a chuckle. “El is a great woman and don’t forget she has super powers.” Those in the know laughed as Eddie continued his speech. A few stories of how they met and Dustin’s more...creative experiments. He looked at the crowd and Steve knew the moment he saw him, his eyes widened before he schooled his expression.

“Seeing you at the alter tonight, promising to love each other until the end, I knew you meant it. Dustin, El, you two made me believe in love again. Seeing your relationship change from friendship to full blown love has been...amazing. The two of you have that old soul type of love.” He glanced at Steve again.

“Not to get too into it but I went through a divorce some years ago that made me bitter.” Eddie said, his eyes never leaving Steve. “I hated my ex, I hated love, I hated...myself.” Steve gasped. “But Dustin,” he turned to the groom. “You wouldn’t let me wallow. You practically dragged me by the ear out of my misery. You said ‘don’t let the heartbreak drag you down. Channel that shit!’” Dustin chuckled and smiled big.

“You played the most metal concert once, you can write the most metal album now” Dustin yelled, likely repeating what he’d said those years ago, causing the party to groan good-naturedly.

“You’re the reason for our third album, man.” Eddie’s band cheered from a table over, startling Steve. He hadn’t realized they were here. He saw Wayne sitting at their table and felt his heart twinge. He was older now, but he still looked good. Like he could kick Steve’s ass.

Eddie turned to El next. “El, you said to me, ‘boys lie. Men love their partners.’ Words of wisdom given to you by Max and Joyce, that you gave to me.” He grabbed his champagne flute and held it in toast. “Thanks to you two, I could forgive my ex, I could forgive myself, and I was able to get back out there and find love again.”

Steve heart dropped, though as he glanced at Abby, he supposed he shouldn’t be upset that Eddie moved on. Even if he felt the green monster peak out.

“Dustin, you’re one hell of a man! Thank you for letting me be a part of your wedding, and sharing in your joy. And though, she can’t be with us here today, I know that Lyla would stand with me and say Congrats you two! Long live the Hoppersons!” Eddie declared before he took a sip of his champagne. “Now, DJ? The first dance please.” He stepped off the dance floor to let the couple take their place before he reached for the flower girl being held in Nancy’s arms.

The little girl looked adorable in her pink dress. She had on a black ribbon like a belt and pink ribbon braided through her hair just like Eddie’s, when he spun her around Steve’s jaw dropped. She had Eddie’s big brown doe eyes. Steve stood shocked to his core as the two giggled together.

Eddie Munson, had a daughter.

Steve couldn’t believe it. He didn’t think Eddie actually wanted kids and the petty part of him wondered if he knocked a girl up on accident or had one to spite Steve. But just as quickly, he hated himself for thinking something so awful. Especially when Abby grasped his hand; sh e’d been an unplanned pregnancy. W hat was that phrase Robin used to use you shouldn’t throw stones if you live in a glass house.

He watched Hopper and Eleven take the floor, then Claudia and Dustin. The two parent dances brought tears to his eyes and a sadness to his heart, he and Eddie skipped them since Steve’s parents didn’t approve and with Wendy...they barely had a wedding, let alone a reception.

The DJ invited everyone to the dance floor and he took Abby to join in at her insistence. She pulled him into the crowd and wrapped herself around Dustin’s leg.

“Yay Uncle Dustin!” She shouted at him. Dustin lit up and lifted his niece into his arms, swung her around, before turning to pull Steve into a hug.

“Hey man! You made it!” He shouted over the music, Eleven pulling him into a hug next.

“Thank you for coming Steve and Abby.” El said in that quiet way of hers.

“Thanks for the invite! How have you been?” He asked. As the three danced, they caught up. Steve telling them about his divorce, Dustin telling him how he proposed.

A few songs in, the flower girl came up to Eleven and pulled on her sleeve. She turned to the girl and bent to her level. “Yes, Lily?” She asked. The little girl, Lily apparently, waved her hand down so she could whisper in Eleven’s ear. El stood and nodded, Steve watched as Lily hugged Dustin’s leg, before she scurried off back to Eddie. He lifted an eyebrow and Dustin chuckled.

“Dustin, it is time for cake.” She said to her new husband.

“Already?” Steve asked. They just ate dinner.

“Lily asked very nicely.” El said. Based on the way Dustin responded, it was obvious the two adored the little girl.

“Lilith, is our goddaughter.” Dustin said as way of explanation.

Steve was envious of the display. He wished Abby got that kind of reaction out of his friends, but since Wendy hated them all, it was hard to get together. He was envious of Dustin too, he knew Eddie’s daughter in a way Steve didn’t, and likely never would.

As the couple went to cut the cake, Steve took Abby to the little girl’s room. After she took care of her business, they exited the bathroom and bumped into Eddie and his daughter.

The two men stared at each other in silence for a minute, before the girls caught sight of each other. Lily hid behind her dad’s leg but peaked shyly at the other girl. Abby ran over and introduced herself.

“Hi, I’m Abigail, but you can call me Abby. I like your hair!” She said sweetly. Lily looked at Eddie uncertainly. He nodded encouragingly at her and she stepped out from behind him a tiny bit.

She tugged on her braid. “Tank you, my aunt Nancy did it. To match my dad’s”.

“That’s nice! My dad’s hair is too short to do much with it.” She said, in that kid like way that was obvious she was repeating something an adult said. Eddie huffed a laugh. “What’s your name?”

“Wily. Short for Wiwif.” She whispered. The gap from her missing two front teeth made her have a lisp. She looked at her dad again but stepped forward and stuck her little hand out for a shake. “My gwanpa Wayne says when you meet new people you shake deir hands.” Abby grabbed her hand and Lily moved their hands up and down.

“My grandpa’s dead.” Abby said proudly. “I’m eight by the way, how old are you?” Lily holds up four fingers but when Eddie cleared his throat she lifted her thumb. “Five? I remember being five. Wanna play?” She asked confidently with a questioning look at Steve.

“If, Eddie says it’s fine.” Steve said, saying Eddie’s name for the first time all night.

“Can I daddy?” Lily asked excitedly. Eddie looked at Steve, and dropped to a knee in front of Lily.

“All right my little demon. If you want you can. But!” he said to grab her attention again. “What are the rules?” Steve froze for a moment. He never thought Eddie would have rules for his kids.

“Make sure I can see you. If I can’t see you, yell weally loud or find an adult I know. If a stwanger asks me to go somewhewe, ask for the magic woud. If it’s wong, say no. If dey twy to gwab me, bite dem.” Lily replied dutifully.

“Two more” Eddie said encouragingly.

“No means no. Respec bounwies” She said resolutely.

“Alright, go you little gremlin.” Eddie said and laughed as the two girls skipped hand in hand to the dance floor.

The two men stood awkwardly for a moment, but Steve couldn’t let Eddie leave. He wanted to catch up even if it was only for a bit. “You named your daughter Lilith?” Steve asked with a teasing smile. Eddie smiled sheepishly.

“Her mom picked it actually.” He said quietly with a soft smile but a sadness in his eyes. “Lyla’s parents demanded a biblical name. I wanted to name her Jezebel but Lyla said she didn’t want to name her after a traitor.” He chuckled at the irony. “What about you? Why Abigail?” He asked.

“Her mom, Wendy, didn’t want to choose. I opened a book of baby girl names and picked one.” Steve answered with a shrug.

“Is Wendy here?” Eddie asked innocently; but, it made Steve get defensive.

“Nah, we got divorced.” He admitted.

“I’m sorry to hear that.” He said. Steve wanted to ask if he meant it, but chose the safer option.

“I wouldn’t think Eddie ‘fuck the establishment’ Munson would have rules for his kid.” Steve chuckled, it was supposed to be a joke, but it came out accusatory. The tensing of Eddie’s shoulders. wilted Steve a bit.

“Yeah well, my dad wasn’t famous.” He said tightly as if that explained everything. And it did, Steve supposed.

“He kind of was though, wasn’t he?” Steve snorted meanly. Eddie scoffed and moved away.

“Her rules keep her safe. Unlike my father, and yours,” Eddie growled. “I actually care about my daughter, not that you’d know that.” He turned on his heel to go back to the ballroom, but Steve’s hand caught around his wrist.

“Sorry, that was shitty. I shouldn’t criticize how you parent.” Steve admitted.

“Why not? It’s not like you had faith in the type of parent I would be anyway, right?” Eddie asked bitterly.

“That’s not true! I knew you’d be a great parent!” Steve exclaimed. Eddie didn’t react beyond nodding in acknowledgment.

“Abby’s eight?” Eddie asked tilting his head toward the dance floor, clearly wanting to move away from this conversation.

“Yeah? So, what?” Steve asked brazenly. Eddie sighed, defeated.

“Nothing, Steve. Just trying to make conversation, excuse me.” He turned to walk back to the ballroom again.

“I didn’t cheat on you, if that’s what you’re wondering.” Steve called after him aggressively. Eddie stopped but kept his back to him.

“I wasn’t wondering anything, Harrington. I was just asking.” The use of his last name prickled his skin. He’d been Steve Munson until he married Wendy, reverting back to his original name. But he doubted Eddie knew that, so it felt like a low blow.

“You know what Munson?” Steve said angrily. He didn’t know why, but all his resentment toward Wendy, his regret for ending things with Eddie, and now his hurt feelings at being so easily dismissed, were culminating in a bad way. Eddie turned to face Steve. “You can act high and mighty all you want, but you’re here alone too aren’t you?”

“Yeah” Eddie said quietly, his jaw clenched, his eyes wet, and even after all these years Steve knew what he looked like before he cried. After all, it was the last face he ever saw Eddie make before today.

“So, who are you to judge me?” Steve asked but didn’t give him a chance to answer. “Abby’s eight because the girl I went out with a few times after our divorce got pregnant. We got married before she started to show so no one would suspect a thing. She was unhappy, I was unhappy. We got divorced so we could be better parents. It is what it is.”

With a glance at Eddie’s left hand, he scoffed: a gold band sat there, nothing like the silver of his old one. It pissed Steve off, reminded him that he picked out the silver so the rings would blend in with his normal ones, even as Eddie insisted he wanted it to stand out. Undeniable proof that Lyla was better than him. “At least I don’t still wear my wedding ring!” He ranted hypocritically ignoring his old silver band from his marriage with Eddie that hung around his neck for the past ten years.

Eddie didn’t say anything, he just looked at Steve in that way that he used to, like he could see right through him. He knew why it hurt so much to see Eddie happy and with a kid. It was a future he could have had if he wasn’t so scared. He knew it was selfish but he wanted to make Eddie feel a fraction of the pain he did seeing his ex so happy.

“Why’s Lyla not here huh? Lyla get tired of you, too? Life of a musician’s wife too much for her?” Steve snarled. A single tear slid down Eddie’s face but he didn’t bother to wipe it away. Still, he said nothing. It pissed Steve off more. “Answer me! Why’d she leave you? Where is she?” He stepped into Eddie’s face, nose to nose, digging the knife in deep.

“She died.” Eddie said, never breaking eye contact with Steve as he cried silently. His eyes were far away, lost in memories and pain. Those two words took the wind out of Steve’s sails so fast he almost got whiplash. It was only then that he noticed a different wedding band hanging on the necklace with his pick. It was smaller, dainty; Lyla’s ring.

“Eddie…” he began shutting his eyes in regret but was interrupted.

“No, now it’s my turn.” He took a breath. “I honestly asked how old Abby was because I wanted to know. I wasn’t wondering if you cheated because frankly, it doesn’t matter if you did. I stopped worrying about why you threw me away a long time ago.” Steve flinched at the phrasing. “You broke up with me Steve, not the other way around. You filed for divorce. You ended it. You don’t get to be in my face screaming and accusing me of shit just because you’re pissed that I ended up in a happy marriage and you didn’t.” Eddie huffed, his eyes hardened into that look that convinced a whole town he was a murderer.

“And you definitely don’t get to come here and talk about shit you know nothing about. You never met Lyla but if you had, you wouldn’t have said a single thing you just did. We loved each other more than anything. We started trying for a kid because I wanted one. I offered to quit the band, she went to my manager herself, and convinced him to add a clause into the band contract that said we would only tour when the kids were out of school and that I would have a back up guitarist that traveled with us. So that if I ever had to dip out of a show for a kid, I could. She traveled with us, the band loved her, the crew loved her, I love her.” The use of the present tense hit him in the gut.

“She never complained about being on the road, in fact she said it was great for Lily to experience so much of the world. I promised her I would drop everything the second she asked me to, and she actually believed me when I said it.” The emphasis wasn’t lost on Steve. Eddie said the same thing to him, but he never trusted it.

“When I asked her to marry me, she laughed, and pulled out a ring she got to ask me to marry her. She loved me exactly how I am and I know we would have been together for the rest of our lives if it wasn’t for that asshole drunk driver.”

“I’m sorry Eddie. I shouldn’t have said any of that.” Steve said sufficiently chastised. Eddie scoffed.

“You’re right, you shouldn’t have. I get that you’re angry. But don’t take your bullshit out on me, alright? You don’t get to be screaming in my face about my dead wife, because you’re mad you didn’t pull out in time. I was never too much for Lyla, I was enough for her. My love was enough for her! So keep her name out of your mouth.” Eddie growled before he wiped his face on his sleeve and walked away, never looking back.

Steve watched him go, full of even more anger at himself than the last time he saw that look on Eddie’s face: pure heartbreak. Because of Steve’s insecurities. Again.

See it on AO3 here if you liked this and you can, donate to my surgery fund here every little bit helps!

[tiredcowboyy]

I hate when people (usually men on reddit) are like “if you met arthur back then he would murder you for breathing in his existence!” Oh would he? When? Before or after he’s finished doodling bunnies and flowers?

[thrumugnyr]

"The High Lord of Autumn" for @sjmvillainweek Day 4: Reign

[rascal-rose]

2023: year of old man yaoi

[manderleyfire]

BOYD CROWDER & AVA CROWDER in 'JUSTIFIED' (SEASON 2)

I lied for you taking that mining money. This is different, Ava. I guess me taking you in and building you up was a mistake. Just set you back to square one. That's not true. You took me in, and you healed me, Ava. You give me a reason to wake up in the morning. For that, I'll be eternally grateful.