#hira writes

[hirazuki]

✧Main Tag✧

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Bleach ✧6 [AO3] Grimmjow Jaegerjaques/OC (Utagawa Hoshi), Ulquiorra/Orihime | post- Arrancar: downfall arc through end of series | canon divergent/adjacent | ongoing ✧Here to Stay [AO3] OC (Utagawa Hoshi) | pre-series | backstory, canon compliant | one-shot

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Fate Series ✧Fate/Postscript [AO3] Sasaki Kojirou/OC (Jean Blair Fleming) | post-canon | canon compliant | multi-chapter but not actively writing

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Final Fantasy XIV ✧A Step Faster [AO3] Zenos yae Galvus/Warrior of Light (Altan Malaguld), Estinien Wyrmblood, Aymeric de Borel | post-StB and post-ShB patches | canon divergent | one-shot ✧Forge Ahead [AO3] Zenos yae Galvus/Warrior of Light (Altan Malaguld) | post-Endwalker | canon divergent | ongoing

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Fullmetal Alchemist ✧Pressure Game [AO3] Solf J. Kimblee & Edward Elric; Solf J. Kimblee & Riza Hawkeye, Riza Hawkeye &/ Roy Mustang | Briggs Arc | canon divergent | one-shot

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Hakuouki ✧A Fleeting Dream [AO3] Hijikata Toshizou/OC Yukimura (Koume), Shinsengumi | throughout series | canon compliant, missing scenes/alternate POV | ongoing

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Naruto ✧Different Bonds [AO3] Haruno Sakura & Akatsuki | post-Tenchi Bridge mission | canon divergent | one-shot

✧Dog Days [AO3] Hoshigaki Kisame, Uchiha Itachi, Deidara, Sasori, Orochimaru, Yakushi Kabuto, OC (Inuzuka Mayu) | chunin exams arc | canon divergent | multi-chapter but not actively writing

✧For Now [AO3] Haruno Sakura /& Sasori, Uchiha Sasuke, Uzumaki Naruto, Sai, Yamanaka Ino, Hatake Kakashi, Kankurou, Tsunade | blank period | canon divergent | ongoing

✧Meanwhile, in Konoha [AO3] Haruno Sakura & Team 7, Yamanaka Ino, Shizune, Tsunade | post-Tenchi Bridge mission | canon divergent | one-shot

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Tolkien ✧What Mercy Means [AO3] Mairon | multi-Age | canon compliant, character study/introspective | one-shot ✧A Terrible Game [AO3] Melkor & Maedhros | Year of the Trees 1497 | canon compliant, missing scene | one-shot ✧Of Silver and Stone [AO3] Celebrimbor & Maeglin | Fourth Age | post-canon | one-shot ✧What We'll Find [AO3] Mairon & Maedhros | Fourth Age | post-canon | one-shot ✧Worth While [AO3] Mairon & Eönwë | post-War of Wrath | canon compliant, missing scene | one-shot ✧Something in the Darkness [AO3] Eöl/Aredhel | First Age | canon compliant | one-shot ✧To be Made of Fire [AO3] Mairon & Arien | Years of the Trees | canon compliant | one-shot

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Voltron: Legendary Defender ✧Allies [AO3] Lotor & Shiro | between S5 E1 & E2 | canon compliant, missing scene | one-shot

• ────────────────────────────────────────── • * I've got only one setting, so literally everything is hurt/comfort, angst, canon-typical violence/themes, and hovers somewhere from T through M. Specific tags are listed on each individual fic.

[ishido-enjoyer]

[hiraya-rawr]

I love the way you write your Diluc!!! It makes my heart skip like badapapapdpdap 😻 What do you think should be the most highlighted aspect of his personality, especially in storywriting?

HI I REALLY LOVE THIS QUESTION ITS SO CUTE UMMM

when it comes to writing diluc, i personally think the best thing to keep in mind is that there's a certain duality to his character.

when it comes to actions, he's two sides of one coin. i like to keep in mind that he's rational but also extremely stubborn, he's smart but will be stupidly reckless, he's both law-abiding and law-breaking.

when it comes to dialogues, i see diluc as someone who -despite being eloquent- has a hard time communicating his thoughts. this causes him to be blunt, sarcastic, or brutally honest. but diluc is also kind, and he tries his best to keep that in his words.

[gigamuffin]

11-13 for arun my boyyyy

11. Is there any existing character from other media that your character resembles? Was the resemblance intentional or was it a coincidence?

He is supposed to resemble his parents lmao. This is a bit of a confession but the core of my ocs are all based on sims i used to play with that spiralled wayyy out of control and now we have this. So he's not really like any pre excising character because of that, however i could probably list characters that inspire me after the fact if i tried.

12. Do you have a playlist for the character? What songs do you associate with them and why?

i do have some resemblance of a playlist for him, its mostly eurodance, "weirdcore" stuff right now. OH and also weird al, i think he would LOVE weird al. Every time Arun hears the weird al version first Tom kicks himself for not introducing him to the original sooner.

13. Do you have a voice claim for the character? What do you imagine the character sounds like?

i havent locked in on a specific voice yet but in my head he kinda sounds like norwegian actor Espen Sandvik:

[pavlikbuonarroti]

growling biting snarling. matildaa.aaaaa...............................

[pitrsattabhaadmeinjaa]

who wants to read a descriptive writing assignment i got in 9th grade where i started a whole story

disclaimer: author was 14 yrs old at time of writing

I could taste the ash.

Standing in front of the great iron gate, one half open, one half seemingly...melted, I could see the last of the fire last night was finally starting to go out, and the sun was coming up. A few stray flames were all that were left of the ferocious explosion that turned Morgenstern Manor into the sight in front of me.

The long rays of dawn swept over the ruined roof, hitting the glass chandelier almost falling out of the front balcony. The reflected light made me lift my arm and cover my eyes, taking a step into the estate, boots crunching on fallen leaves. I spotted a lone crow sitting on top of the mansion, eyes boring into me. The soft rain ash had no effect on it, nor me. I’d like to imagine it was here for the same thing as me, to grieve for people who perished here. The surrounding trees were charred, bird corpses visible.

The explosion was faster than their wings.

Dragging my eyes away, I took a flower out of my bouquet, a cluster or black flowers lined with silver and blue. I grabbed the lot of them from the nursery on the way here. I put it down in front of one of the burned trees and could’ve sworn the crow nodded at me.

I started walking to the manor entrance, going around an almost pristine fountain displaying the goddess Nyx, thriving in the ash. Strangely, I could still smell the faint jasmine from it.

The tiny stones were crunching against my feet as I made my way to the door, opening it, hearing the creak it always made. I was thankful for the sound, deafening in the quiet around me. The door handle felt smooth under my palm, a contrast to the rough hardness of the hand-carved doors.

The floors inside were made of light shades of marble, and the high ceiling of the entryway used to boast the grand chandelier now blinding visitors outside. The table with the key bowl in front of me had a leg broken, blood dripping down its sides. There was a blob next to it on the floor that vaguely looked like a head with short hair, but for my sanity, and appetite, we’ll deem it a fur bag.

I continued into the first sitting room on the right side and felt more than saw all the flies. One was swatted away from my face and the second one thankfully realized I wasn’t its target. I was willing to bet I knew exactly what it was, but for points mentioned prior, I turned back out into the side hallway, even though I wanted to see what had become of my great aunt’s piano and portrait.

Horrific doesn’t even begin to describe the scene in front of me.

There was debris everywhere and blood was dripping down the walls like a tacky horror movie. Broken glasses, spilled wine and food starting to rot littered the floor. Bile was crawling its way up my throat and I was extremely thankful for my boots, because to get to the first floor so I could successfully ignore all this, I had to cross the hallway to stairway on the other side.

Fortunately for me, the corridor wasn’t too long. I crossed it in no time, passing the grumpy portraits of my family matriarchs. I’m sure I could figure out a curve equation from my great-grandmother’s frown.

Hopping over an abandoned purse, I reached the marble stairs, almost slipping on champagne. Heading upstairs, I reached the east wing, full of my family’s bedrooms. I went into my room, ready for a familiar sight.

What greeted me was so—different, not even the most shadowed corners of my memory could drudge it up.

It was no less than a haunted house.

One of the walls had apparently decided to run away, with one of poles of my four-poster bed it seemed. While they celebrated their freedom, I surveyed the damage.

The vanity mirror was cracked, showing six versions of me and my terror of a room in the background. The wooden doors to the walk-in closet/secret room I had discovered were hanging off their hinges, and the bedsheets were ripped. The only thing still standing was my rifle on the wall, a present from grandma.

The sorrow threatened to choke me, seeing my childhood home like this, but I clutched the bouquet and forced the lump in my throat down. The floor had splintered wood from the furniture, and I once again thanked the gods for my boots.

I clutched my bag to my body, stepped inside the closet, went into the portal that had opened while I was grieving for an old life in my room, and disappeared, never to be seen on Earth again.

I had a sister to raise from the dead.

AN: i dug this up from somewhere. damn this is all over the place. you can give advice/constructive crit. please.

[burntchickennugget2468]

but wait!! flowershop hirynne..BUT BARISTA BRYNNE

[hydrasaura]

My problem when writing characters is that i want to make this and this the same character 😭

[vigilxnte-shit]

join the tuna team!

ever wanted to join a discord server full of people who share your love for one specific, depressed, hot martial artist with a lot of catholic guilt? do you have other interests such as baldur's gate 3 and musical theatre? if so, the tuna team is the place for you!

the tuna team began with the intention of a server where daredevil writers could unite to share our writing, beta read for each other, and just talk about our favorite blind lawyer/vigilante. since then, it has morphed into a place where we all talk to each other about our lives, share pictures of pets, and scream into the void about everything we love.

the tuna team welcomes anyone of any age (well, any age 18 and over), religion, gender, etc. etc. and we would love to have you! if you want to join, message me your discord username and i'll send you a friend request!

be advised that the server is 18+ and although we love charlie and his characters, we do NOT allow speculation on his personal life. we ask that anyone who joins be respectful of others' pronouns, identity, and boundaries- specifics on this are available upon request!

members of the tuna team:

here is a brief introduction to each current member of the tuna team! i am relatively new to interacting with the DD fandom (i've been a fan since 2022, but only just recently started talking with other fans online) and am frankly stunned that so many cool, talented, amazing writers who i look up to are in this server. everyone in here is inspiring and supportive, and contributes to the great vibe we have going in the server!

~~moderators~~

vienna @vigilxnte-shit: hi, as you may have noticed, this is me. i'm the owner of the server, i'm mostly here to write, talk about husband!matt, and send pictures of my cat, coconut.

brooklyn @jazerno: brooke is my irl best friend and roommate, as well as coconut's technical legal mother. brooke originally joined to be a moderator, but has since fallen for frank castle, as one tends to do.

mar @mar-thewriter: mar is a very good friend of mine who i met via another server of people i love. mar doesn't talk much here, but is a great moderator who i love dearly.

mads @madschiavelique: mads is the one who made our gorgeous get roles channel and is our coding genius. they are the ones to thank for

~~tunas~~

leg @a-leg-without-fear: leg is hysterical and our resident emoji artist. she has created all of our emoji in the server and also the lovely art featured above, as well as countless other fun works!

yuna @yarrystyleeza: yuna is the sweetest person you will ever meet and fun fact: tuna team comes from her name! yuna always has the best headcanons and her oc, madilyn, is DARLING.

sapph aka sunshine @sunflowersandsapphires: sapph is the mama of our server, she is sunshine incarnate and always has the best writing prompts + blesses our eyes with her pets!

hira aka robin @amphitrite-5: hira is a very soft and kind soul who regularly makes everyone's day with her kind words. she's also one of our best gamers and doesn't like to sleep (though really, none of us do)

via @zomtart: via is the #1 frank castle character defender and i have no choice but to respect that. they're hilarious and we love having them in the server!

i cant find mariam's tumblr: i was scrolling through mariam's messages and literally fighting the urge to laugh in the office. mariam is hysterical and our representative elektra fan.

eclipse @ecxlipse: eclipse is the baby of our server (i think) but has sent us plenty of gorgeous art and wonderful matt headcanons, and they always have the best contributions to our conversations!

crys @what-i-call-men: crys is responsible for several of the best, spiciest headcanons that have come about on the server. they also have sent the best photo of themselves wearing a DD mask.

zena @coxology101: zena is a busy bee and running her own server, but when we do hear from them, we get some of the best thoughts and BTS dardevil pictures.

ivy @catholicguiltboi: ivy is hysterical and has blessed is with photos of their son, yoshi (who i think is a lizard but i am not very smart).

pasta @pastafossa: my jaw dropped when i saw pasta wanted to join. they contribute so much laughter, many great ideas, and the best advice to the server and we are thrilled they're here.

sybil @gracethyomen: brooke and i have spent several nights since the server started laughing in our apartment over something sybil has said. they are genuinely one of the funniest people ever.

shiori @shiorimakibawrites: shiori has blessed us with some of the best matt thoughts time and time again. like pasta, their name is so recognizable to me that i was genuinely shocked when they asked to join, but i'm so grateful they did!

bella @bellaxgiornata: you'll be sick of hearing this but i genuinely could not believe bella wanted to join the server. in my eyes, she is like the taylor swift of the daredevil fandom (and for clarity's sake, that is the highest compliment i can give). in the server she constantly has the best ideas and is always so supportive of everything we all write.

lindsay @shouldbestudying41: much like bella, this is someone who i very much look up to and respect in the daredevil community. having her in the server is a blessing and they are insanely good at time management- i'm incredibly amazed by their ability to juggle so much at one time!

we also have a couple without blogs; aspen and paris. they are good irl friends of mine who don't say much, but are a joy to have in the server anyway :)

divider on top by @sister-lucifer

tuna team art by @a-leg-without-fear

[negrowhat]

15 Days BL Challenge the Quadriquel

58. BL scene that made your imagination go wild

Type leaving the homies down in the lobby to get some dick. Because how long were Champ and Techno down in the lobby waiting for Type to let them up? Was it a quickie? Because Tharn really doesn't do quickies. I have questions my mind made up answers for. TharnType 2: 7 Years of Love.

Go Yoo Han telling Choi Yeon Woo about his face blindness. The way I obsessed over that confession, because who would've known? The way everything Yoo Han did prior to that moment kind of clicked for me. He was so straightforward with his words and his compliments to Yeon Woo's appearance weren't just him flirting. And finally it confirmed that they sort of completed each other. Literal mind blowing moment for me. Color Rush.

Nagisa and Shun's kitchen makeout scene. Because how far would they have gone if Sora had not walked in? They both looked about ready to devour each other right there in the kitchen. Did anyone write a fic about that? His the Movie.

Wen Kexing's ONE sword fight. Oh it's my fave fight from the entire series and I love damn near all the fight scenes. Kexing's sword fight was so fucking iconic and he was so smug and he kicked that man's ass. That fight tickled the right side of my brain. 100/10. Word of Honor.

Rain riding Payu. That is literally my most favorite love scene in any Thai BL and I am still so obsessed with it. And more importantly we got to see Payu's blissed out look?????? It's imprinted in my memory for the rest of time. Love in the Air.

Hira and Kiyoi's lil makeout session under the covers. Because in my mind Hira never stopped and ran away because Kiyoi said 'ouch'. No in my version Hira listened to Kiyoi and ravaged that man the way he so desperately craved. Utsukushii Kare: Eternal.

Boya becoming one of Qiming's Spirit Guardians. Oh gawd, Boya choosing to give up his spirit to protect Qiming and the entire city was one of my fave scenes. Qiming didn't want him to do it but Boya trusted him to keep his body safe while he was battling above. It was a great moment between them and it also led to Qiming finally perfecting his protection sigil. The Yin-Yang Master: Dream of Eternity.

[dreamingsnowflake2013]

In the end, Hira, the ultimate bullied doormat suffering from stammer and low self esteem, and stalker (which is actually one of Kiyoi's endearments for him) makes Kyoi, the ultimate king, stutter and run after him! Talk about a complete role reversal. He becomes so confident in Kiyoi's love for him and secure about their relationship that he only tells Kiyoi he wants to go somewhere and turns around with a bold little smile, 100% sure that his beautiful man will follow him anywhere.

Not only that, Hira even dares to be openly impatient and boss him around, demanding him to hurry, and Kiyoi literally jumps over a fence to follow him!

What sets My Beautiful Man from almost all BL dramas out there is its insane quality on all the levels, and one of them is the writing, which intricately builds the story and the characters in such a way - they are flawed and imperfect, making them so beautifully and relatably human - that their victories and happy endings always will so wholeheartedly satisfying.

That's because it all feels earned - they suffered for their happiness, changed themselves without losing the sight who they are, and earned the right to be happy.

[hirazuki]

Mairon/Sauron (Tolkien) Cosplayer + edits: me Photo credit: tranimaging2 Wig: Arda Wigs (Grace, in “Fire Orange”) Contacts: Uniqso (Sweety Crazy Red Demon Eye) Ears: Aradani Costumes (Sun Elf Ears) Circlet: PernCirclets (on Etsy) Gorget: Crystalsidyll (on Etsy) Gauntlets: Jadekei (on Etsy) Leather armor: LederFantasies (on Etsy) Fangs: Scarecrow (Small Deluxe Fangs) Gloves, dress base, and finger armor are mass-produced/store-bought; boots are my own. A deep, sordid ire filled with the knowledge of memory burst through his mind, and threatened to suffocate. Unwilling, yet he could not look away. In remembrance his face turned terrible, memories past flickering behind his eyes. - @ruiniel

[ishido-enjoyer]

[hiraya-rawr]

i know there’s ragnvindr!sibling reader, but what abt little sibling alberich!reader? how do you think diluc and kaeya’s fight would impact younger alberich sibling reader and their relationship with each brother?

First of all, I'm a sucker for anything found family 💕 I actually already made two versions of Alberich MC, one is the two-chapter work, Family Roots! (where MC was separated from Kaeya as a child) and another drabble of Pains of being their Sibling + (part 2) (which talks about how their fight affects MC).

[incorrect-mtg]

Flavor Text Highlights - Theros

<- Previous Set | Next Set ->

My initial pick for the Worldbuilding category was the Theriad. But since its spread over 3 sets and not in order, I will save it for a dedicated "Honorable mentions" post I'll link here.

Cool - Fabled Hero

“You. Poet. Be sure to write this down.”

Funny - Peak Eruption

“Early olive buds? A good omen. Flock of crows? Not so good. Mountain exploding? Bad. Very, very bad.” —Hira, street oracle

Worldbuilding - Ray of Dissolution

The works of one god last only as long as the patience of another.

Emotional - Commune with the Gods

For the first time in many years, Elspeth asked for help.

<- Previous Set | Next Set ->

[emotionallychargedtowel]

Hira's parents and his self-defeating tendencies

I was talking to @sorry-bonebag and @wen-kexing-apologist about what role Hira's parents might have played in creating the weirdness he displays throughout both seasons of Utsukushii Kare & Eternal. I started writing a response and it got too long and, well, now it's a post.

Before I talk about Hira's parents and the tendencies in him that they helped to create, I want to note that family of origin is just one of the influences that form us as people. Parents and caregivers have a huge influence, as do other family members. But so do peers. The bullying about his disability that Hira experiences nearly constantly is one of the biggest influences on his personality.

Hira's parents appear extremely briefly at the very beginning of the series. His mom fusses a bit about him being on his own and his dad is very "he has to take care of himself sometime" about it. We know they took him to specialists for his dysphemia, bought him his camera, etc.

Their departure is a show thing, by the way, and isn't present in the novel. In the novel they continue to live with him through high school and, if I remember correctly, part of college. But they don't play a big role in his life. The main things that happen involving them are either instances of Hira hiding things from them (or attempting to) or instances of his mother briefly, sporadically, having a big burst of worry about him. It would make sense if the show version of his parents were the same way aside from the leaving-him-to-live-alone part of things, though that’s not shown.

The rest of my thoughts are largely headcanon since I’m working backwards from his personality to guess about his formative years, but they match up with the little bit that’s shown in the series and how his parents are in the novel. I see Hira as having a self-defeating personality in a lot of ways. The typical etiology of this kind of personality (the set of conditions that lead up to it) is supposed to be a rather deprived childhood that is punctuated by occasional bursts of parental attention when the child is seen as in crisis somehow (or when they attract attention in other self-defeating ways, like intentionally getting in trouble).

This reminds me of something Nancy McWilliams writes about in Psychoanalytic Diagnosis, attributing the idea to someone named Emmanuel Hammer: “a masochistic person is a depressive who still has hope.” [I should note here that “masochistic personality” is an older term for self-defeating personality that is not meaningfully correlated with masochism in a sexual sense. I think that, despite how he might appear at first glance, Hira actually isn’t sexually masochistic or submissive. I have a whole mostly-written post about this that I hope will see the light of day eventually.] In other words, whereas the background that creates a depressive personality involves deprivation that's intense enough that the person gives up on the possibility of receiving the love they need, the self-defeating personality has had enough success with occasionally getting their needs met that they keep trying. If that’s what happened with Hira, it would be consistent with what we see of his parents in the series. We know they pulled out the stops at certain points when it comes to his dysphemia. Anyone who’s a parent can tell you how hard it is to get a good specialist to see your kid, even when they have some kind of glaring issue and you have decent healthcare access overall. The fact that they managed to get him in with a specialist is notable all on it own. (I actually have some stressful phone calls I need to make today in a similar vein, seeking specialist help for one of my kids.) They also spent a lot of money on a DSLR for a young kid. And yet they’re OK with letting him live alone and after that point remain very hands-off. It also seems like despite the attention they paid to his dysphemia during that one period, by the time of the series they’ve totally stopped trying to support him about it.

Basically, I think his parents are largely neglectful (emotionally rather than materially) but that every so often, they freak out and pay a bunch of attention to him because they perceive him to be in need of rescuing. When he was young, he probably appreciated the attention when it happened, but at the time of the series he gets those needs met in other ways and/or displaces that need for attention onto Kiyoi. The idea of seeking attention in this way maps especially well onto his relationship with Kiyoi, because he seeks Kiyoi’s attention and approval through exactly the sort of strategies typically used by people with self-defeating personalities. Here’s McWilliams again:

Reik (1941) explored several dimensions of masochistic acting out, including (1) provocation [she refers to a previous anecdote about a woman who feared angry outbursts by her partner because of experiences with her father; she would act out in ways that antagonized him in order to “get it over with”], (2) appeasement (“I’m already suffering, so please withhold any further punishment”), (3) exhibitionism (“Pay attention: I’m in pain”), and (4) deflection of guilt (“See what you made me do!”).

I can think of plenty of instances of provocation (the first type). Hira often does things he knows will make Kiyoi angry, and sometimes visibly relishes the negative attention.

One good example is the scene in Eternal where he creates a totally avoidable misunderstanding by vaguely talking about how “a divorce is going to happen” because of an affair, which Kiyoi takes to be referring to their relationship and specifically, to Hira cheating. When Kiyoi rears back to punch him, Hira protests for a moment but then says being killed by Kiyoi is actually a longstanding wish of his. It turns out it’s Naho-chan who is getting divorced because her husband cheated. Hira could easily have spoken more clearly when he brought this up by using subjects in his sentences. When he first brings up divorce, Kiyoi says, “Who are you to decide on your own without me agreeing? What dissatisfaction do you have with me?”, which makes it clear he thinks Hira is referring to something involving him. Yet Hira continues to speak without subjects when he elaborates and says the reason for the divorce is an affair. He only clears up the misunderstanding after Kiyoi has lost all patience and is (legitimately!) freaking out. There's no way this isn't, on some level, intentional.

One version of appeasement (the second type of self-defeating acting out) that McWilliams talks about is criticizing oneself before others can do so. It’s no exaggeration to say that Hira talking himself down to Kiyoi is a defining characteristic of their relationship. There are lots of examples of this but a particularly classic case is his constant refrain about being a “pebble.” His invitation for Kiyoi to “Please hit me as much as you want” after their fight in season 2 is another example of appeasement. 

It’s hard to pin down specific examples of Hira employing the third type of acting out, exhibitionism. It makes sense that they wouldn’t be easy to find, though. This is a very covert type of exhibitionism that doesn’t announce itself. I think you can observe it in subtle ways, though. For example, when Shirota dumps tomato juice on Kiyoi, a bunch of it gets on Hira as well. Afterwards, Kiyoi cleans the juice off of himself as best he can, seemingly as quickly as possible, and changes his clothes. But when he talks to Hira afterward, dried drops of juice are clearly visible on Hira’s face. Acidic juice on one’s face would probably feel uncomfortable, but he intentionally doesn’t wash it off. It’s like he’s wearing these stains as a badge of honor and proof of his mistreatment.

I think deflection of guilt, the fourth type, is less characteristic of Hira than the others. He tends to absorb guilt rather than deflecting it, blaming himself in a way that often takes the form of the self-critical form of appeasement.

I think it's worth noting that he also employs appeasement as a strategy in the hostile environment of high school. His biggest rule in school is to avoid attention as much as possible, so exhibitionism and provocation aren't acceptable options. (He does disobey Shirota in a way that could be considered provocation when the rift between Kiyoi and Shirota first starts to form, but I think that's more a case of overt rebellion.) We don't see him employ deflection of guilt, though his teacher does seem a bit more forgiving of his attack on Shirota given what he knows about Hira's experiences with bullying. But appeasement? When he can't avoid attention entirely, that is his go-to strategy. It doesn't draw much, if any, additional attention this way. He can demonstrate to people who pose a danger to him that he's not a threat and is ready to comply with their orders if it will allow him to avoid mistreatment. It's only when he finds a kind of vicarious strength in Kiyoi (see my post here for more on that aspect of Hira) that he starts to deal with the bullying in other ways.

So, yeah. Hira's parents initially formed these patterns in Hira, peers deepened them, and they came out in his relationship with Kiyoi. A big part of the shift that needs to happen in order for their relationship to last is for Hira to stop using self-defeating strategies to sneakily get his needs met by Kiyoi and start seeking what he needs openly and assertively.

Maybe now would be a good time to brush off those other in-progress Utsukare posts and try to finish them off while I have a bit of momentum, huh?

By the way, if you’re interested in my previous Utsukare posts, I have a master post here with links to everything.