#him waking up doesn't have anything much to do with the concert but i still appreciate the cutscene AHAHAHAHAHA

[brynn-lear]

Bro is adorable just saying

[honeyydrunk]

nct are such fraternity boy college athletes fuckboys coded it's insane !! everyone i see a video of those men with the homosexual tendencies, vaping addiction, and their athletic garments, it really only cements this theory. their disography and music videos add to this too 😔✋ u know 90's love, universe (let's play ball), alley oop, bad alive eng ver.

can imagine them walking around this elite prestigious campus all loud and obnoxious. they know everyone is looking at them and want to fuck them too. they're chronic drinkers, vapers, cheaters, fuckboys. what would get most students expelled, they do on a tuesday afternoon.

nct are mostly made up of foreigners right? watch them walk around the campus as rich international students, some are here on academic or athletic scholarships they don't need. everything they own is designer. playing the 'sorry my korean isn't so good, can you help me?' card, and what they want help with is you sucking their dick.

the korean members aren't any better. they're every single horrible stereotype you hear of korean hongdae fuckboys. will come up to you all sweet and pretty, but they're horrid.

cw for under the cut: they are toxic males

can literally imagine haechan vaping on the college campus, moaning in the back of the class obnoxiously, and pulling the thing where he jokingly asks for your number ALL THE TIME. going to college parties and getting wasted after 3 drinks idk 🤷 ,,, he'd be so whiny and teasing too. bc obviously he's a rude BITCH but he's so pretty and whiny and flirtatious. he's fucking everything in sight, absolute whore!! his body count is triple his age. he'd genuinely try to suck one of his friends' dick and claim it doesn't mean anything because he has clothes on !! 😔✋ he'd be stroking his dick while you're in the room, whimpering your name. the type to get on his knees and beg for any kind of attention from you..

mark lee starting off being a cute college boy canadian transfer but becomes the NOTORIOUS korean pastor's son fuckboy in like the span of 3 months. he'll act real nice, and that's because he is real nice. being super sweet and asking if you want to get coffee with him and study. and he's so good with his words you'll think that's all it is. but then of course, since he's so good with his words he'll have you blushing and giggling as he takes you back to his apartment and gets your clothes off. talking yapping so much you don't even realise what he has you doing, that you're just another girl he's pulled. he'll still be whispering when his face is in your pussy. telling you how easily you cum. "dang girl, wait a lil' can't you?" implying you're the whore,

YUTA yuta is the entire campus crush. the star football ⚽️ player and the rockstar vocalist in a band. has sex with all the groupies that come to his concerts. he's dragging people up on stage to shotgun them while the guitar break plays. absolute heartbreaker. would definitely kick the ball to your head so that when it hits you, he has to go over check if you're alright, take you up to the nurse and wait with you. he is such a liar, it genuinely hurts. lying all the time and making up words and stories left and right. but he smells like cherries and watery perfume !! he tastes like it too. you'll be coming to all his garage concerts just to see if you'll be the one he takes backstage to fuck after. he's like a god, half the time you don't even realise he's a student like the rest of you. he's just an angel sent to have fun and fuck or smth.

jaemin nah he's horrid. he'll cheat on you, and with his cute smile you'll forgive him instantly. 😔✋ he'll spend a little cash dress you in designer, make you cum until you faint, and tell you how beautiful and perfect you are for him. he will genuinely have you thinking those girls meant nothing to him, theyre just a way to vent his stress and you're the only one he loves. and then bro will say he can't stay the night, as he needs to wake up early for training. you agree, obviously. and he left for another girl's house to fuck her too. when you met him he smelled so sweet, and it was someone else's perfume. each of his girls swear they're his favourite of his, and one day he's planning fucking them all in the same room.

JOHNNY SUH? he would abuse the american transfer student status. he walks around without a shirt, soaking wet, and never get pulled up. he's rich too, got bands on his wrist and multiple cars. going on holidays overseas every chance he get and hosting parties every weekend. when you get drunk at one of them, almost falling off the balcony, someone will come up and help you to a chair. he'll take real good care of you, going above and beyond. so you can't let this guy leave when he's everything you've ever wanted. so you pull yourself onto him and ride him while the party rages on inside. make sure his dick feels so good he'll ask for your number. but you don't know that you're the fifth girl who's thrown herself at him that night.

taeyongie ^-^ he's the prettiest guy you've ever seen. bros too sweet and shy to be handing out with the rest of the neo WHORES. he's the leader of a lot of clubs but he mainly sits in cute little cafes. genuinely he seemed too adorable? to be considered the 'leader' of some horrific ahh fuckboys. until you check twitter and you see someone's reposted his MANY MULTIPLE HE HAS A LOT sex tapes. he's surrounded by ridiculously hot guys and girls, and they're passing him around like a joint, and he's begging to be humiliated. they're making him cum so much he crying. he's stronger than most of them but he's letting himself be thrown around like a doll. absolutely wrecked. looking in the camera with pretty black eyes and a slurred voice before someone shoves a cock back in this throat "am i pretty?" zhong chenle is the epitome of the chinese international student stereotype. he's almost never there, never takes off his sunglasses. he has several of those douyin type baddies trailing after him. "you have nice collarbones and pretty eyes, i like. what's your instagram?" he'll be talking with his friend renjun about what yacht he should buy during class. he can buy your affection simply because he's just that rich. will shove his black card down his pants and tell you there's only one way to get it. buys rolex watches so that he can have it on while he fingers you. dresses you in diamonds and he doesn't want to be paid back in cash. qian kun is there on an academic scholarship, but he doesn't need it. he's just that good, the school begs to have him attend. he's not a fuckboy in the conventional sense but he's just as nasty. he wants to have the perfect girl for him, to bring back to his family. he'll look for the most naive but academic girl he can. he's a manipulator. he's trying to mold you into what he wants. he'll replace your entire wardrobe with designer, but he picked out all the clothes. he'll plan cute dates for you every day, but it's to stop you from hanging out with your skanky friends. he'll buy you a new phone, but he's already added software tech to spy on you. in some essences, even though he's not a fuckboy, he's much worse than one.

jisung, like taeyong, looks so sweet. but he's NASTY. he'll seem too quiet to be hanging out with the rest of the dreamie WHORES. so you don't mind sitting next to him in your lecture. but he's just a mix of all of dream. he's good with his words like mark, and he'll have you agreeing to meet at his place EASY. he's too cute to refuse like haechan and jaemin. and then the renjun part hits, silent and sneaky, he'll be doing everything to make you think you're coming on to him. once he finally has you, he'll make a mess of you like a feral animal, the way you've heard jeno fucks. and you realise he's just like the rest of the dreamies, you shouldn't have thought otherwise. he might actually be worse than all of them.

tell me if u want me to make these like a full post or add more characters IM SO CRAZY DELULU RN SORRY xx !! 💋

[sunderwight]

contemplating an SVSSS fic where Airplane transmigrates into Tianlang Jun instead of Shang Qinghua.

he wakes up before Tianlang Jun was about to walk into the HH Palace Master's plot, but too late to really do much about Su Xiyan's situation or the frame job. of course, being Airplane, he doesn't go face down the sects and get sealed under a mountain. but he also doesn't know what to do about the whole situation with Luo Binghe.

he was too vague in his outline and especially in his actual story. finding Xiyan or possibly some random washer woman who lives along the Luo river is a needle in a haystack situation, and he didn't ask for any of this to happen to him, so he just ends up leaving it alone. Tianlang Jun goes back to the demon realms with his confused (but relieved) nephew, and works on consolidating his power there and on thwarting the attempted incursions of Huan Hua Palace.

HHP has egg on their face because they riled up the other sects and got them into this alliance/ambush plot and then the heavenly demon they were supposed to fight didn't even show up. hasn't even been seen in the human world since. while HHP tries to spin it as them being so strong and formidable that they scared him off, the other sects feel like they're just blowing hot air and trying to take credit for something that never even happened. was that head disciple of theirs even involved with a demon at all? suspicious how she just disappeared, too. maybe it's a cover-up. no one's particularly impressed or convinced after the fact that HHP's claims are on the level.

which at least means that there's no concerted effort to wage a war or anything. Tianlang Jun meets a young Mobei Jun and Airplane decides to expend a lot of time and energy in helping the young prince consolidate his own power, so that's a whole thing. there's no system so Airplane's not obliged to preserve the plot, but he still knows it's out there and he's gotta skirt the line between giving MBJ absolute power on a silver platter and not setting MBJ up to be killed by the protagonist one day.

there are benefits and problems to TLJ mostly leaving Luo Binghe's whole journey untouched. on the one hand, he anticipates that everything around Luo Binghe will continue just like in the novel, so that's easy to predict. but on the other hand, that means he's in for some trouble when the blackened protagonist emerges all super-powered and unbeatable from the abyss and starts taking revenge on everyone who wronged him (a category which potentially includes the deadbeat dad who abandoned him for years).

so as the time of the immortal alliance conference approaches, Tianlang Jun starts to think that he needs to get ahead of this.

the most logical solution is to prevent Luo Binghe becoming quite as OP of a protagonist as he'd been the first time. since TLJ is plenty powerful himself (one of the things Airplane enjoys! as well as being very rich!) LBH really does need every edge he could possibly get to be a threat to him. so, why let him gain those edges?

this leads to TLJ's brilliant plan: just don't let Luo Binghe get thrown into the Endless Abyss! no blackening, no all-powerful weapon, no gauntlet of monsters to hone his skills, just a run-of-the-mill heavenly demon hybrid who could never in a million years take his old man in a fight!

TLJ decides he can two-birds-with-one-stone this situation by capturing Shen Qingqiu. then, one day if LBH does still make it to his doorstep, he can present him with his hated scum villain as a peace offering. like well son I know I abandoned you to suffer on your own, but plausibly I didn't even know you existed, so here, have your abuser to dismember in cathartic violence as you please! become a filial son and this old man will help fund whatever massive harems you want to build!

genius!

so, shortly before the immortal alliance conference is set to take place, TLJ goes and steals himself a peak lord.

Shen Qingqiu is... kind of different from what he expected? but oh well, it's been years since he wrote the novel and lots of characters have turned out somewhat different in person from how they were on the page, and the guy was always a mess of contradictions anyway. TLJ hands him over to his servants with strict instructions to keep him locked up, but not to harm or kill him (revenge is reserved for the protagonist, after all!)

Zhuzhi Lang, who witnessed the last debacle where his uncle took a sudden keen interest in a cold but beautiful human cultivator, makes entirely the wrong assumption (as do a lot of the palace staff) and figures that TLJ has just become more pragmatic about pursuing his lovers. Shen Qingqiu is given appropriate chambers (and restrictions) and word soon spreads that the Demon Emperor has captured a human cultivator to serve as his concubine.

so, this version of SQQ has actually been Shen Yuan since Luo Binghe joined the sect (and also doesn't have a system and thus had zero plans of throwing LBH into the abyss), and he is desperately trying to figure out what kind of changes he has unwittingly invoked here that Luo Binghe's father should be still alive, and free, and also kidnapping him to be his goddamn concubine?! that has to be a misunderstanding, right?!

Mobei Jun is mad. and jealous. and mad. but a concubine isn't an empress, so that job posting is still available, right? it better be, he has been waiting more than a decade for the official proposal!

TLJ meanwhile decides he's going to go secretly watch the immortal alliance conference just to make sure that the universe doesn't contrive to drop LBH into the abyss anyway, but weirdly enough, Luo Binghe isn't even there. listening to rumors, he gathers that uh... some stuff has changed? like Luo Binghe is head disciple of Qing Jing Peak? and apparently went crazy when Shen Qingqiu disappeared? except that some people think they might have eloped???

maybe he shouldn't get his rumors from Xian Shu disciples, those girls remind him of rpf conspiracy theory shippers from his old life. they're probably just way off base! hahaha... ha...?

well at least TLJ did a pretty good job of covering his tracks, so there's no reason for anyone to suspect that he captured Shen Qingqiu. or there shouldn't be, until he goes back home to find that every single demon seems to believe that Shen Qingqiu has been taken by him to be his lover. where did anyone even get that idea?! TLJ has been dutifully pining in his unrequited and inappropriate love for the young Mobei Jun for years now! whenever anyone asks he insists he's still mourning Su Xiyan! it's been a whole thing!

but oh shit, truth aside, there's no way those kinds of rumors have remained strictly contained to demon ears. both demons and cultivators have their spies after all, and even if they didn't, news moves along the borders.

sure enough, TLJ barely has time to try and dismantle this misunderstanding before a young Luo Binghe arrives on his doorstep, along with Yue Qingyuan and the very-much-still-alive lord of Bai Zhan peak, for some reason, all of them extremely pissed off at him!

[suiana]

The death of an artist

he's always found you beautiful, even in your death and rebirth. you'll always be perfect to him. always

(yandere! musician x gn! reader) (cw: yandere stuff idk, im wiritng this while shitting i hope u enjoy my poopoo core, 2.04k words)

you might not have realised it but your silent admirer had always watched you.

he's watched you from the shadows, observing how you interact with others, how your eyes were once full of light and joy as you shared your paintings for the world to see.

it was beautiful.

you were beautiful.

he was but an aspiring musician back then. a couple of listeners here and there but never enough to fill up a concert hall. meanwhile you were a famous artist, with your paintings selling out for millions at all the art exhibitions you hosted.

you little admirer totally idolized you.

i mean, who wouldn't? all your paintings were so full of life, oh so meaningful, and most importantly, they were made with love.

love, love, love.

it was the one thing that made you stand out from all the hundreds and thousands of artists. the one thing that inspired him to even start writing songs.

your art made him feel loved. it made him feel wanted, even. he remembers how he'd get a fuzzy feeling from all your paintings, how it sent a delightful tingle up his spine as he takes in your carefully crafted masterpieces.

though there weren't any texts, all of your paintings spoke a thousand words. and they spoke to him.

with every new piece you put out, it was like he was getting to know you better. to know you on a personal level. it made his head spin and his heart leap in delight. after all, you were his idol. the one he admired so much that he began to pursue a music career dedicated to you. the career he once left behind in favour of living in this sad world.

though at one point in time, he hit a wall.

he couldn't get any ideas, no fresh inspiration for his music. the musician could only stare at his score as his mind desperately grasps at nothing. he felt like he was dying.

then you came through, like an angel of salvation.

well, looking back, you were more like a demon of salvation. especially because that one single text from you kick-started his disgusting love for you. it feels wrong to call you a demon though, not when you were so holy that he feels like touching you will corrupt your divine light.

he still remembers waking up and seeing your text on his instagram DMs. your bright red notification ping that gave him all the motivation he needed to think of a new idea.

'hey! just wanted to tell u i really enjoy ur music! cant wait to see u get famous >w<'

he swears he could die happy just seeing you message him. you messaged him. you know of his existence??? no fucking way bro. he still wonders if he used up all his luck when you messaged him so innocently that day.

of course... he responded and thus began a friendship (?) between the two of you.

friendship. yeah, maybe for you.

truth be told, he doesn't know if he ever saw you as a friend to begin with. he always thought you messaged him because you were interested in him too. whatever, these small details aren't important.

he released a love song not long after your first interaction with him. it instantly became a viral hit, taking his follower count from the thousands to the millions. he was glad it performed so well on the charts, they were his feelings to you after all.

the now famous musician had to thank you for getting him out of his rut. without you, he'd probably have gone back to doing medicine. so he did the best thing and that was to invite you out for a meal. he had to thank his muse, didn't he?

you were a little hesitant at first. that's okay, if anything he thought it was cute that you were suspicious of him. there will be plenty of time for you to warm up to him later.

the little get-together, or first date as he likes to call it, went well! you two saw each other in real life for the first time! and boy was he smitten. if he was unsure about whether he was in love with you before, he sure as hell was sure now.

you were so much more lovely in real life than you were over text. all smiles and laughs, your admirer feels that his songs didn't do you justice.

"this was fun! let's do this again!"

oh for sure he will do it again. he just wants you all to himself now. to keep you with him, a never-ending source of inspiration for the rest of his life. his beloved muse. the one he writes for. the one his songs are dedicated to. his.

so your falling off played out nicely in his favour. you were trying out an experimental style, said that he inspired you. it was one that not many would be able to understand at first glance, completely different from what your previous one was. your loyal fans stood by your side of course, him included. but the general public eventually started ignoring your newer pieces in favour for something they didn't need to use much thought to understand. for someone fresh, someone new.

he could see the way the light in your eyes slowly started to dim at the lack of interaction. sure, you said that fame wasn't important to you, that all you wanted was to showcase your art to the world.

but your little admirer could tell that it was bothering you more than you'd like to admit.

he saw the way your texts with him grew more erratic, the way the vibrant life in your eyes started to slowly dim, the way you started pushing out more works to compensate for the style change. you were desperate for the attention you once received. the way you changed in real time, becoming a slave to the consumers, like an animated robot that pushed out art just for the sake of it...

it was a little sad to see to be honest. it was like you were there, but you also weren't, you know? your name was on the artwork but he didn't see you in it.

but he was glad things turned out the way it did. it meant that he could be there for you when you cried and felt like a mistake. it meant that he could offer you a shoulder to cry on when the times were really bad.

"there there, it's alright. just let it all out."

his gentle caresses as you cried your heart out into his chest... it was delightful to see you depend on him so much. that you'd come seeking comfort from him in such a dark period of your life. he felt so wanted by you.

meanwhile, his fame was only growing larger by the day. while you were on a path to being forgotten, he was making a name for himself in the music industry. brand deals, billboards, advertisements. he was everywhere, like a ghost haunting you, to remind you that your friend was thriving while you weren't.

the musician wonders whether you've ever hated him. that you'd think he was stealing all of your fame. after all, your fame went down not long after you messaged him. he really wonders whether you've ever blamed him for making a change in your art style.

it doesn't matter now.

the artist in you was gone.

"hey, what if you make me an album cover?"

you only stared at him with dark eyes before looking away. everyone around you had slowly started distancing themselves from you. the change in your personality and looks had scared them. everyone but him had stayed. his words about horrid snakes deceiving you fill your head as you cling to the attention he gave you. who were you to deny your only friend left?

"sure."

you didn't give much thought when designing his new album. it was an avant garde album that had themes about desperation, love, and death.

how ironic, you thought.

you gave the complete piece to him a few days after, heavy bags under your eyes as your friend hugged and kissed your cheek. he's been taking care of you recently. having you move in with him, cooking you food and covering all of your expenses. he treated you like a lover. albeit you found it a bit weird that he told you not to leave without his consent. said that he didn't want people to harass you. you found it sweet of him. you were glad that he cared for you so much.

"my dear artist friend designed my new album cover, yes. i think they were a perfect fit to help design this particular album cover. they're..."

your fame immediately came back. interviews, likes, commissions, the things you were once familiar with came running back at full force after your friend's interview with a big channel.

you think if this happened earlier you'd have caved under the attention. the big spotlight, fans.... the attention will always be intoxicating. even now, you feel yourself smiling at the number of notifications you're receiving from strangers.

but you've realized that their attention is only temporary. the second you grow irrelevant they'll drop you again. just like they did before.

the only one who matters is your friend. the one who whispered sweet nothings and reassured you when you were drowning in a mass of nothingness. the one who gave you the attention you craved.

you immediately started a new piece in a new style.

'Intertwined'

a painting that gave you more fame than what you initially had before. it was a piece about self enlightenment, discovery, and contentment. and some claimed that it was the best painting that you've ever made. a masterpiece.

you showed your friend your work right after you were done and you could've sworn you saw a hint of shock in his eyes. maybe also fear? you don't know.

"this is... beautiful."

his words were slow, gaze intense as he stared at your painting for what felt like hours. you think he was mesmerized. you never asked him.

you made another painting after that.

'final duet'

again, people claimed that it was a masterpiece. your friend looked stunned again and he called it beautiful like always. he told you that he's never seen something so artistically perfect before and that he's proud of you. you like it. his compliments make you happy.

"this one is for you."

you made another piece. a simple painting of him in your style.

'untitled.jpg'

"is... it mine now?"

he proceeded to draw you into the painting as well after your words. you didn't understand what he was doing. but you found it cute. he was drawing you?

"there. now it's perfect."

he smiles down at you before pressing a kiss to your forehead like he always does. you've grown so used to his kisses that you were expecting one already. you lean into his touch before smiling softly.

"i'm so happy with you."

"me too."

the seed of life was sprouting once more, growing around the stem that it's learnt to grow dependent on.

he was everything to you. you feel like you'd die without him. but you know it'll never happen because your dearest friend will always remain by your side. he promised you. his words are like gold. he's the only one who matters.

you never want to be apart ever again.

thus you made your final masterpiece about love and dedication. a flower thriving in a dark environment and growing to love the dark, having died in the shining light once before.

'rebirth'

the blinds to the outside world shut on the two of you. no one else is important. he tells you he loves you. you repeat it. his hands wrap around you as you lean into his cold touch. you're cold too. you used to be warm once, he says he likes you cold better. shutting your eyes, all you focus on is the steady beating of his heart.

now no one will ever bother the two lovers ever again.

[bluemari23]

dancing like butterfly wings || park seonghwa

summary: you've been feeling a little down lately as you experience another flare up, and not wanting to feel like a burden, you try to to hide it from your soulmate.

pairing: seonghwa x reader

genre: fluff, soulmate au

warnings: some depressive thoughts, insecurities, mc going through it, disabled reader (POTS), mentions of vomit/vomiting

masterlist

for my disabled people who sometimes just wanna be taken care of ❤️

-----------------------------------

It wasn't like you always wanted to feel this way, incompetent and unable to do anything. You felt like a complete burden.

Even Seonghwa felt like he had to stay back with you, instead of going and exploring the city before the concert tonight with the rest of the boys.

You woke up feeling a little nauseous, until it was time to get up and then you had to run to the bathroom, hoping you didn't wake up your sleeping soulmate. He had a long night last night, having a concert and then doing a live with Hongjoong and Wooyoung.

He didn't get into the room until after two am, practically falling into bed beside you and pulling you into his arms.

You closed the door, hoping it would block the sound of you, but it didn't. You could feel the hand rubbing at your back as he holds your hair back with his other hand.

"Go away Hwa. I don't want you to see this." You cried out, frustrated with yourself and your body, thoughts moving back to why you couldn't have a normal body.

"Baby, why didn't you tell me you weren't feeling well? Is that why you went to bed early?" He asked, trying to figure out if you were in a flare up or just sick, or both.

He hated seeing you like this, and always tried to do his best to help you prevent flare ups, but sometimes you couldn't prevent one. Noe even with all the preparation in the world.

"Please Hwa." You are practically sobbing now, but you had managed to stop throwing up.

Seonghwa moved you so you were lying against his chest, a warm wash cloth already in hand as he then helped clean you up and wipe away the sweat that accumulated on your forehead and brow.

It had taken a little while, and the ignoring of your pleading, to get you back into bed and curled up against his side. He had already messaged the boys about your condition and that he would be staying back with you.

You hated that your body decided that now was the time to attack itself, a flare up of your disability leaving your heart rate unable to lower and your blood pooling making you nauseous and unable to lay still.

"Alright, my love. I have your salty snacks, and your drink. How about we put a movie on, hmm?" Seonghwa looks down at you after pulling you back into his side as he gets back into the large, comfy hotel bed.

"Please Seonghwa, I can take care of myself. You've always wanted to explore this city. it's okay, I promise." You try to tell him, but he doesn't hear it.

"That's the thing, my love. You don't have to take care of yourself. Not anymore. Not when you have me." He squeezes your shoulder and places a soft, loving kiss to your temple before moving to grab the remote and look for a movie for the too of you to watch.

-*-*-

*knock*knock*

You both turn to the door, hearing voices and a small screech before the door opens, Wooyoung falling in with Yunho holding the door key and the rest of the boys peering inside.

"Guys? What's going on?" Seonghwa asks the boys, mainly looking towards Hongjoong who just looked at you both sheepishly.

"Well, we heard you weren't feeling well and wanted to cheer you up." Hongjoon responded, holding up a bouquet of your favorite flowers, already in a cute vase.

That's when you both noticed the rest of the boys were all holding different items or bags, with the legos in Jongho's grasp catching your eye.

You couldn't help the tears that threatened to fall from your waterline, seeing how much the boys cared for you.

You tried to sit up so you could get out of bed only for San to move forward, propping up the pillows behind you and preventing you from leaving the bed.

"No, it's okay! We'll just sit with you!" San grinned at you, making a small smile grow on your own lips. He sat down and put his bag on the bed, opening it to reveal your favorite takeout. You didn't even know they had it in this city.

"See, baby. You don't have to take care of yourself. We will do it."

[downundergarfield]

Hello 👋

can I get each mercs reaction to near death experience with S/O

your writing is cool <33

G'day!! Thanks for the compliment! I tried to write something short but cozy for each mercenary, I hope it doesn't look damp or bland <:)

Mercs with S/O who survived near death experience

Tw!...near death experience?

A bright flash. A rough blow against the wall. There's still a lot of pain coming from nowhere. You are lying on a wooden floor almost under the open sky on the tufort balcony.

At first you tried to rest on your hands, but it caused hellish pain. You cough, feeling the corners of your lips warm with blood. The last thing you see before you pass out is how the Medic hurriedly runs towards you with a field first aid kit and holding the coat from falling.

You wake up for a while. Honestly, you couldn't tell how long you'd been out. Feelings are slowly returning, the torso hurts, both inside and out, the head is splitting, but when the vision returns, you see all the brave mercenaries around your hospital couch.

"- oohoh! Gut!! you survived the procedure!"

Says the German accent you know.

Everyone exhaled. You needed to be alone with yourself. All the mercenaries came out, telling you that's everything okay

You kept lying there. Until there was a knock on the door. It was N/M. He wanted to check on you.

Scout:

This joker has never looked so lost. He quickly darted to your bed, sat on a stool next to you and looked at you with his puppy dog eyes.

"- God, I am, I was so scared, I was so scared, I couldn't think of anything but you, I was so scared that I would lose you, The medic said that you could die, I was so scared, I-I "

"- ahhh" you say, raising a calm hand to his lips. He wiped away his tears and calmed down more or less.

"-Y/N, you know how scary it was... But I.. I'm happy that you're okay! Honestly!"

You smile at him, he smiles at you

he hugs you tightly, but trying not to damage the fresh seams

Soldier

He came in and sat down without any unnecessary words or movements, but his big mouth betrayed all his emotions.

"You know, Y/N, I've lost a lot of soldiers on the battlefield. I've lost Sour Joe, Smelly Joe, and even Mighty Joe."

You nodded understandingly, looking away. Then you felt his heavy and big cold hand on your arm.

"- and I'm very glad that I didn't have to lose you too, Y/N. You are a good soldier, real good, maybe even the best."

He rested his helmet head on your side, causing a little pain from the scars on your chest and held your hand with both hands.

Next to him, death is not terrible. You sat like that for a long time until you fell asleep from the cozy feeling that this American next to you caused.

Pyro

They come into the ward, humming something to themselves, sit on a stool next to you and immediately grab your hand.

You can hear their terrified bellowing, they were very afraid for you, very much. They brought you a bunch of sweets and delicious drinks. You suggested that Piro relax a little.

They took out toy ducklings and started showing you concerts with them. It was charming how much they were interested in making you happy.

Anxiety receded quickly, while this mumbling lump of happiness was nearby.

Demoman

You're surprised you didn't notice him even before he opened the door. Usually the Demo is immediately noticeable by the smell of alcohol or drunken speeches. But not today. The Scotsman sat down next to you, taking your hand in his big warm palm

"-laddy, please, be careful next time, alright?"

You smiled and nodded to him.

"-I couldn't even drink all this time, I was afraid that I would lose you.."

He rested his big lips on your forehead and closed his eye, kissing your forehead.

"- next time I won't let anyone near you, do you hear? They will shatter into small pieces."

You smiled at his words, deserved another kiss on the forehead.

You talked for a long time about what happened while you were away.

Heavy

A broad-shouldered figure entered the ward, you felt really big hands on your hands

"- My God, how could I let this happen."

You comfort him by stroking his huge hands.

"- I'm glad that you stayed alive. Darling, please be careful next time, I don't want to lose you."

You nodded, giving him a warm smile.

"-I brought you a couple of books, do you mind if I read Nekrasov to you?"

You nodded with a smile. Although I was worried that you might not understand something.

But it was nice for you to hear his native speech and see how he smiles from the realization that you like to listen to his native speech. You knew that most likely he does this to distract you from bad thoughts. He often read different writers to you to calm down or lull

"-Гляжу с тоской на розы я и тернии

И думой мчусь на край миров:

Моя душа в Саратовской губернии,

У светлых волжских берегов.

Я близ нее! О рай, о наслажденье!

Как на мечтах я скоро прискакал!

Бывало, я имел туда хождение

И словно конь почтовый уставал..."

Engineer

The engineer turns up next to you pretty quickly

"-oh, sorry, partner, I couldn't be there, you know..."

You calm him down with a nod

"-if it helps you, I've collected special stilts for you. With the help of them, you will be able to get back on your feet 3 days faster than expected! I tested them with a Medic, he said that everythin' should be fine!!"

You could see the sparkle in his eyes, even through his goggles.

"thank you, Dell."

You say it softly. It was actually quite painful to speak. But after hearing your speech, he relaxed even more

"-darlin', I couldn't sleep all those nights how long you were gone! I'm glad that everything is fine. I don't want to lose you." he raises your hand to kiss it.

You nodded to him with a smile, pet the robotic hand, he gently moved towards you to kiss you on the cheek.

Medic

He was sitting in the office next to you the whole time, nervous and watching how you were feeling. As soon as you felt good enough, and the beeping devices attached to you began to show some indicators that were clear only to him, Ludwig jumped up to your bed holding your hands and rejoicing

"- Yes!!! Yes!! I was able to save you! Zhis is my greatest triumph! Another 2 minutes and your torn stomach would have killed you! But I managed to fix everyzhing. Patched up zhere, here, you are the crown of my work in medicine over the past year! Hohohoo~"

You were happy that your beloved psycho is doing well. He's so charmingly proud of himself.

He was there for the rest of the time. Sometimes by injecting something into you or giving you pills. Your condition only improved, and the pain receded. He's really a master at it! you ask him to come closer to kiss his forehead

"Oh, no-no-no herr Y/N, you can't move yet! Ich do it myself!" and he comes closer, kissing your forehead. Kind and truly loving

Sniper

You woke up from familiar warm hands on your own, the Sniper looked sad, but still managed to smile for you

"-Those were the scariest 4 days of my life in this year ..."

You know how hard Bushman is going through the loss of relatives. And you were very dear to him. That's why the poor man was so worried.

You stroke his hair on his hand, suddenly remembering that you have something to show him.

You carefully try to open your hospital gown and show him your Y shaped incision. The Medic left it when he was piecing your body together.

He shuddered when he saw it. But he thought it was cute that you decided to point out this little similarity between you

"- thank you. I won't let anyone else get close to ya. I've already found that wanker. Unlike ya, no one will put his brains back into his skull."

You giggled as much as it was possible in your position.

Mick lay on your shoulder and stroked your head in complete silence for a very long time. Until you fell asleep next to him..

Spy

A man in a balaclava shows up in your room with an abstracted face

"You should have been much more careful, it's like you forgot all my stealth lessons"

He didn't blame you, he was just upset.

The Frenchman sat down next to you anyway, stroked your head and took the cigarette out of his mouth

"Please, never hurt yourself like that again. I was very worried"

He hugs you, gently, without touching your aching chest. Sorry.

You sit quietly for as long as it takes while he tells you what happened while you were gone

[mugloversonly]

What Happens Afterwards?

I read this post by @acowardinmordor and was obsessed with what happened next. Written with their blessing.

also on AO3

tw: overdose, drugs, near death experience, mentions of HIV

Summary:

Famous Eddie doesn't touch drugs...too bad Steve does After Steve ODs at a Corroded Coffin concert, he wakes up in the hospital.

Steve woke up groggy and confused. Is he in a hospital? Suddenly the night rushed back to him. He did a line, borrowed a needle. He’d meant to go back to the dressing room, but he hit the deck before he could. Shit!

He shot up and frantically looked around, hoping beyond all hope that he was alone. Luck was not on his side though, because Eddie was asleep in the hospital chair next to him. Steve took a long look at the love of his life. His eyes were red and puffy with deep bags. His hair was a tangled mess as if he’d been yanking on it. And his clothes were rumpled as if he hadn’t changed them in days.

Steve sighed. He really didn’t want to have this confrontation right now. Before that thought could even leave his brain, Eddie opened his eyes and met Steve’s. The pools of chocolate were filled with a myriad of emotions. He leaned forward and took Steve’s hand.

“Hey, Stevie. How’re you feeling?” He asked softly as he reached over and pressed the nurse call button. Steve was confused by the softness, but he wasn’t going to complain.

“How did I get here?” He asked instead, dropping his gaze.

“You were brought in as a John Doe after the concert baby.” He whispered, his voice thick. “They said you overdosed.” He didn’t sound angry, Steve would have preferred that. Instead he sounded guilty. Steve forced himself to look and felt bile rise up at the expression on Eddie’s face. “I’m sorry baby.” Eddie said. “I’m so sorry.” Tears ran down his already tear coated cheeks. Steve expected yelling, berating, and ultimatum. Anything but an apology.

“Sorry for what, Eds?” He asked. “You didn’t do anything.” That turned out to be the wrong thing to say as it turns Eddie’s cries into sobs. Something sour built a home in Steve’s chest.

“Exactly! I didn’t do anything!” He said emphatically, gesturing wildly. “You were missing! And i didn’t do anything! I let everyone else handle it while i panicked. I still played the show. I didn’t follow my gut and looked who the junkies were that night!” Tears streamed down his face, but the words rattled something in him.

“How long have I been here?” Steve asked hesitantly. Eddie took a stuttered breath.

“Five days. You’ve been here for five days. You were missing for over 24 hours.” He bit his lip trying to stifle more tears.

Steve was floored. Five days?! Wait…missing? “Oh, baby.” Steve said, mournfully running the hand not hooked up to anything along Eddie’s cheek. He melted into the contact and put his hand over Steve’s. “I’m sorry for putting this much stress on you.”

“For a minute there, I’d thought it came back.” Steve knew exactly what Eddie meant. The upside down. “But when I found out you ODed…I almost wish it had.” Eddie admitted. “This is all my fault.” He whispered unable to hold the tears back any longer.

Steve felt like he’d been on top of the world from what he could remember of the high, and he thought about chasing that rabbit. But the look in Eddie’s eyes, the deep well of pure devastation and guilt swirled together, made Steve pause. He couldn’t do this to Eddie again. “This isn’t on you.” Steve insisted. “I told you I quit. You had no reason to assume I’d be in that bathroom.” Eddie just shook his head.

“If I hadn’t forced you on the road, you never would’ve had access to this kind of hardcore shit in the first place. If I spent more time with you, if I never left you alone, you wouldn’t have felt the need to do this.” Eddie trembled. “I should have protected you better, I knew what that shit could do, I’m so sorry baby.” Steve knew then that there wasn’t anything he could say. Eddie would blame himself for this until the end of time.

That more than anything else, broke Steve down. “I’m sorry, love.” His voice trembled. “I shouldn’t have lied. I just didn’t want you to worry.” He flipped his hand up in offer. Eddie immediately filled it with his. He squeezed it as he continued. “You had so much to worry about, I didn’t want to be another. But I should have known that you’d worry anyway.” Steve looked away, ashamed.

“Baby…” he was cut off as a doctor came in.

“Well, Mr. Harrington. You’re lucky to be alive. The cocktail of drugs you took was extreme.” The doctor said.

“What do you mean?” Eddie asked.

“The heroine appeared to be laced with meth. And the line he did was cocaine and ecstasy.” The doctor said calmly. Eddie gasped a shuddering breath and his hands shook in Steve’s grasp.

“I didn’t know the heroine was laced.” He said. “It wasn’t my needle.” The regret was finally showing up. At this the doctor’s eyebrows rose to his hairline. Eddie yanked his hands away and covered his mouth.

“I’ll send in a nurse to grab some blood so we can run some tests.” He said. “In the meantime Mr. Munson, I recommend limited physical contact.” He directed that to Eddie with a look of sympathy. He nodded and the doctor took his leave. Tears sprang to Eddie’s eyes and ran down his face.

“You shared needles, Stevie?” He asked in shock, his voice quiet. His fear was clear on his face. “Have you been…doing other things for the drugs?” Steve had to come clean.

“I’d do pretty much anything for them.” He admitted.

Eddie stood up quickly and made to leave the room. “I’m going to go let Robin know you’re awake.” He dashed out before Steve could say anything else.

He fucked up. He always felt guilty after the high wore off, but this time it was horrible. He’s in the hospital, after disappearing for over a day. He should have been more careful. He knew sharing needles wasn’t the best plan, but at the time the high was worth it. But the look of betrayal, sadness, and the tiniest glimmer of disgust on Eddie’s face just now, was enough to make him never want to touch another pill. Sleep snuck up on him and he prayed that Eddie would be back when he woke up again.

His prayer went unanswered. The next time he woke up, it was Robin by his bedside. She was staring at the TV but she wasn’t really watching it. “Hey Robs” he said. She whipped her head around so fast he wouldn’t be surprised if it popped off.

“Steve! You’re awake!” She exclaimed. The smile on her face fell quickly. “You’re an idiot. If you weren’t in this hospital bed right now, I’d smack you.” He shrunk down in the face of her ire. “What were you thinking?!” She shrieked.

“I didn’t think it’d be that bad.” He admitted. The fire in her eyes could set the arctic ablaze.

“Not that bad? Not that bad?! You ODed at Eddie’s concert.” She began counting on her fingers. “You lied about being clean. You shared needles with some random junkies!” On the last point she threw her hands up. “How often have you done that? Don’t lie to me Steve.” Her eyes narrowed.

“Every once in a while when I get the itch for it. Maybe once every few months or so.” He admitted grimly. Robin’s eyes narrowed.

“So however many months you’ve been doing this, you’ve been sharing needles?” She clarified. At Steve’s nod she sprang up and paced the room. “Every time?”

“Not every time, but not rarely either.” He said as guilt started to creep into his stomach. She ran her hands into her hair and yanked on it softly.

“Have you been getting tested at least?” She asked.

“I’m not cheating on Eddie, Robin!” Steve yelled, hurt that she’d even imply that. She stopped pacing and turned to him.

“Okay, first. I didn’t say that. Second, your word has no credibility right now. I know you wouldn’t, dingus. That’s not why I was asking.” She grabbed his hand. Before she could continue, a nurse came in.

“Oh good! You’re awake. I’m going to be taking some blood okay?” She asked but really was demanding. She glared at Steve as he held out his arm for her.

“Is everything okay?” Robin asked. The nurse turned to her and gave a small smile before glaring again at Steve.

“With the patient, everything is looking like it’s returning to normal.” She snapped the tourniquet into place but when Steve flinched she didn’t look remorseful. She drew a few vials of blood, stuck a bandaid on, and pulled off the tourniquet all in silence. As she got cleaned up to leave, she finally spoke. “Look kid, it’s not my place. But that boy out there? I can take a guess as to what your relationship is with him.” She flashed a tiny pride flag pinned inside her scrubs. “He cares about you so much. He was beside himself when he came in and saw you, he had you moved to this room, he asked us if there was any kind of experimental treatment, anything to help you.” She turned that glare on him again. “He loves you to the ends of the earth and he will never leave you. You better clean up your act to be worthy of that devotion, because make no mistake. He would let you drain his veins and apologize for not bleeding out faster.” She stalked over to Robin and handed her a stack of papers. She jabbed a finger in his face, “don’t you dare break up with him in a misguided attempt to save him from you. You clean up your act. If not for yourself, then for him.“ With that she stomped out of the room and practically slammed the door behind her. For a moment neither of them said a word. Steve was filled with regret and Robin was a bit smug. She looked down at the stack of papers. Rehab clinics.

“Should we pick one?” Robin asked.

“I think I want to do it with Eddie.” Steve replied. “The nurse was right. And so were you. I’ve taken him for granted and my word means shit right now. I want to prove to him that I want to get clean.” Robin hesitated.

“Do you?” She asked. “You don’t seem particularly regretful about the actual drugs.” Her tone was soft even though her words were harsh.

“I do!” Steve exclaimed. “You didn’t see the look on Eddie’s face, Robbie. He was devastated and blamed himself for all of it. When I told him I’d do anything for the drugs he got up and left. I don’t think he’s coming back in.” He trailed off into a whisper. Robin took hold of his hand.

“Stevie, he’s right outside.” She said. At Steve’s confused look she continued. “He’s sitting on a bench right next to the door. He wanted to come back in, but I asked him to let me talk to you alone.”

“Why?” Steve asked. Robin’s eyes hardened.

“Because what I’m about to say, he wouldn’t like, but as your best friend I have to tell you hard truths. And Eddie's my best friend too so I have to protect him.” She took a deep breath. “You deserved his love once Steve. I truly believe that. But right now, his love for you is hurting him. And the only one who can fix it? Is you. He hasn’t slept or eaten practically at all since you disappeared.” Steve flinched at the word disappeared. “When he called me he was sobbing so hard I thought you died Steve.” Her eyes watered. “He kept repeating ‘it’s all my fault. I did this to him’ and Jeff had to take the phone to explain what was going on. When I got here, you were still touch and go. You died on the way here, Steve. They had to resuscitate you. The sound he made when the doctors told him that…” she shuddered. “I felt his heart shatter. The nurse is right. He will forgive you and he won’t ever stop loving you and he won’t ever leave you.” Her eyes got intense again. “So you need to promise me. Promise me! That you’ll take care of yourself. Because I don’t think I could survive watching him wither away if you leave him.” The emphasis she put on leave tore Steve apart. She didn’t mean break up with him. She meant leave him. “You don’t deserve his devotion. Not after you lied to him for months. But you have it. So now, you need to cherish it. Got it?” She asked. Steve could only nod as the dam finally broke. They held each other’s hands as they cried together.

~~~

“Can you get Eddie? Please.” He asked after his eyes dried up. Robin nodded and dashed out the door, waving Eddie inside.

Steve’s heart broke at the sight of him. He looked exhausted and his eyes were red rimmed as if he’d been crying for hours. Steve held a hand out to him and Eddie rushed to take it. Steve slid over in the hospital bed, yanking Eddie in after him. He curled around him and held him close being mindful of the wires in his hand as he draped it on Eddie’s chest. Eddie took a deep breath but Steve could feel the anxiety still thrumming under his skin. “I’m sorry, love.” Steve whispered. “I shouldn’t have lied.” He halted when he heard the sniffles. He sat up, peering at Eddie. His cheeks were wet again and Steve reached up to wipe them clean.

“Stevie, I have to ask…” he began. “And I hate to even think it. But…” he paused. “Did you…when you said you’d do anything for the drugs. Did you sleep with people for them?” He finally spit out. Steve wanted to be mad. He wanted to hiss and spit and rage at the accusation. But he knew that wasn’t fair to Eddie. He was within his rights to ask.

“No my love.” Steve promised. “Never.” Eddie nodded and sighed with relief. “I don’t know how much my word is worth right now.” He admitted. Eddie pressed a finger to his lips.

“I trust you.” He said. Those three words broke Steve. How could Eddie trust his word after everything? He asked him as much. Eddie just smiled softly. “I trust you because I want to. That’s all there is to it.”

“I’m sorry for everything.” Steve repeated desperately.

“I forgive you.” Eddie promised. “Now, let’s forget the past for a minute and focus on the future.” Eddie said. Steve looked over his shoulder to the door to the room and saw Robin and the Coffin boys. The boys were glaring at Steve but he knew it was because he hurt their friend.

Steve grabbed the rehab brochures and the two went over them until they found one that had a branch in DC. “I don’t want you to cancel the tour Eddie.” Steve was adamant. He ruined enough of the tour so far and he wouldn’t be the reason it ended. At least in DC he’d be close to Robin who would keep him in line. She promised Eddie daily updates (real updates) once Steve got out until the end of the tour. Eddie finally agreed after the boys convinced him he’d need the distraction so he wouldn’t be pacing around the house all day.

Steve leaned up to kiss him, but Eddie pulled away. The regret in his eyes was almost enough to soothe the hurt. “Not yet Stevie, okay?” He asked. Steve nodded but his head tilted in confusion. “Not until the blood tests come back.” He explained. Suddenly, Steve understood. He put himself at risk and Eddie too. The virus going around was deadly and Steve had been careless. Playing russian roulette with not only his life, but Eddie’s too and by extension the band’s.

The shame that filled him was so intense he reached over and retched into the nearby bed pan. Robin ran over with a trashcan and he kept heaving. Eddie rubbed his back as he emptied his body. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I…” he cut off by dry heaving. He finally understood why Eddie ran from the room earlier and why the nurse glared at him. He’s a monster. He put the love of his life at risk of contracting a deadly disease just so he could get a fix. What the hell was wrong with him?

When he was finally done, he was exhausted. “Sleep baby.” Eddie whispered. Steve clutched tight to his hand.

“Will you stay with me?” He asked. As his eyes drifted shut.

“Forever.” Eddie whispered as Steve floated off into a dreamless sleep. His last thought was that he needed to prove he was worth forever.

~~~

The next time he woke up, Eddie was still there. Asleep curled up beside him. But in the chair next to him was someone he hoped not to see. Wayne. Their eyes met and he didn’t say anything, he just raised his right eyebrow and Steve folded. He apologized for letting Wayne down, for hurting Eddie, for lying about it. He begged Wayne’s forgiveness, but the man didn’t respond. His gaze flickered to his sleeping nephew and softened.

“You listen to me boy.” Wayne said. “My nephew is a gentle soul, quick to forgive and let things go. You should know that based on how he was after that spring break.” They both shivered at the memory. “So, he’s not going to want to hold you accountable. He’d rather just move on and take your word for it. But lucky for him, and not so lucky for you, I will be holding you accountable.” He leaned in. “I love you like one of my own Steve, I really do. But I love my brother too and he ain’t seen Eddie since they locked him up. Eddie forgave him within days, trusted him. I learned then, that if Eddie loved someone, he’d forgive pretty much everything just to keep them around. So I’ll tell you the same thing I told Al. Eddie is my boy, first. And I will protect him from anything that will hurt him, even if it’s himself. So I’ll be holding you accountable. You’re going to rehab?” Wayne asked. At Steve’s nod and explanation of where, he continued. “You’re going to give the rehab my information as someone who they can talk to. I’m going to call to check up whenever I see fit. Got it?”

“Yes sir” Steve replied. The nurse from before knocked and opened the door quietly. She paused as she saw Eddie curled up in the bed next to Steve. She gently shook him awake.

“Mr. Munson? We have both of your blood tests back.” At this Eddie was wide awake.

“You got some blood tests done Ed?” Wayne asked.

“Yeah, just um…just in case you know?” He trailed off not making eye contact with his uncle.

“Good news or bad news first?” She asked.

“Bad news first, always.” Eddie and Steve replied in tandem. They shared a private smile.

“Bad news, Steve you have moderate kidney damage. It won’t take much more to send them into failure.” She said with hard eyes.

“And the good news?” Wayne spoke up.

“Good news, you both are negative for any STDs. Including HIV.” The three men breathed a huge sigh of relief. The nurse turned to Steve. “You got lucky kid. Don’t forget that.” Steve assured her he wouldn’t and she left with a nod. He couldn’t believe he’d been so reckless. He turned to Eddie and was immediately pulled into a soft kiss.

~~~

“They said you’ll be discharged soon.” Robin said later. “Then what?” It was just the two of them.

“Then, Eddie drops me off at rehab and I get help. I stay clean. I do everything to be worthy of him.” He declared. Robin nodded her approval. Eddie came back from the hotel with all of their things packed away in a rental car. He slid into bed next to Steve.

“Hey, baby. You ready?” He asked. Steve nodded and they all left the hospital. The three of them piled into the car and drove Robin to the airport. She was going to fly back to give the boys some time alone. She hugged Steve and then Eddie. She whispered something in the his ear that had him tearing up. She went into the airport with a promise to call Wayne if she ran into any trouble.

Then it was just the two of them. They spent the first hour or so making idle small talk before the curiosity got the best of him. “What did Robin say to you?” He asked.

“Nothing important.” Eddie answered far too quickly.

“Oh, come on. You can tell me.” He knew he was being annoying but he didn’t want to think about what was awaiting him at the end of the ride. Eddie sighed, he never could keep something from Steve.

“She said if I could forgive you, I should forgive myself.” He admitted.

“You still blame yourself, love?” Steve asked. Eddie bit his lip as he nodded.

“If I hadn’t dragged you on tour, you never would have found that stuff.” Steve couldn’t let this stand. He knew he had to finally come clean.

“I was already doing it.” At Eddie’s questioning noise he continued. “As soon as we got to LA, I was looking for it. I did it at those events because it was free from someone else's supply.” He took a breath and glanced at Eddie before he admitted the next bit. “I didn’t get into this shit because I was on tour with you. I wanted to go on tour because I didn’t want to be away from you. That it would be way easier to get my hands on shit, just sweetened the deal.”

Eddie was quiet for a while after that. Steve glanced over and saw his cheeks were wet. He’d made him cry again. “So, you didn’t start them because of me?” He whispered.

“No love. And to be clear, even if I started on tour, it still wouldn’t have been your fault. You didn’t hold me down and force a line up my nose okay?” He reached out and wiped away a tear. “This was my choice. Just like going to rehab is my choice. If I didn’t really want to go, I wouldn’t.” His conviction was clear. Eddie pulled to the side of the road to kiss Steve softly before they drove the rest of the way in comfortable conversation.

They arrived at the rehab center and Eddie walked him inside. He checked in, Eddie handed over his credit card, Steve handed it right back and handed his over. The attendant smiled and swiped Steve’s card giving the boys a moment alone. They held each other close and kissed not caring at the moment who saw them. “I love you, baby. Don't forget okay?” Eddie whispered leaning his forehead to Steve’s.

“I know, love. I love you too. More than life.” He replied. He gave a final kiss to Eddie’s lips and followed the attendant into the center. He was determined to come out a new man.

~~~

Six grueling weeks later, Steve was out. He had a sponsor and group therapy sessions. Waiting to pick him up was Robin. Eddie was on the last few weeks of the tour. They had to extend it a bit to cover for Steve’s hospital stay. Robin gave him a long hug. “Ready to bust out?” She asked and they both got into the car. He lasted barely five minutes.

“How is he?” Steve and Eddie didn’t speak at all during his rehab. The center thought Eddie being on the road would be triggering to Steve. And to be frank, Wayne thought Eddie needed to distance himself from the process for a bit. Wayne and Robin had kept them both informed on the other.

“He’s okay. I mean…he misses you terribly, but he’s been coping on tour.” Robin said. Thankfully the drive wasn’t very long. Steve wanted to be in a familiar place, even if life outside of rehab was scary. They pulled up to Robin’s building and Steve stepped in after her.

There was a loud pop and confetti raining down on him. “Welcome home Steve!” Came several voices he was not expecting. The entire party was here. Wayne, Hopper, and Joyce too. But what brought him to tears was the sight to his left. Eddie was there, holding his arms open. Steve ran into them, nearly knocking them both to the ground.

“I thought your tour didn’t end for a few more weeks?” He asked in between kisses.

“I lied about the end date to surprise you.” He admitted holding Steve close. “Are you surprised?”

“Very! A good surprised!” The two pulled apart so everyone else could greet Steve. Eddie didn’t go far, not letting go of Steve’s hand the entire time. He’d felt better in rehab once the withdrawals subsided. More clear headed, more aware. But he didn’t feel completely healed. Feeling the warmth of Eddie’s hand in his, Steve felt hopeful for the future. As he made eye contact with the man again, Steve silently promised to stay clean. Not for just Eddie. But for himself too.

~~~

He skipped the next tour as recommended by his therapist. The two men decided it would be better if he wasn't alone, so Wayne stayed with him. He'd been retired from the plant and wanted to move out to LA with Eddie anyway.

He and Eddie had a hard time, but they make due with calls and letters. On one memorable occasion Steve sent a racy Polaroid. That night, Eddie called already worked up and they had a wonderful time. The reunion was so sweet. They were locked in their bedroom for days, coming out only for food and water. The rest of their friends knew better than to come visit until the love birds made the first move.

The band wrote a new album and started a nonprofit for drug addicts. It helped those who couldn't afford to get clean and see therapists, providing them with clean needles and clean drugs to help ween off them. Steve didn't shy away from his overdose, or the affect it had on those around him and he encouraged the others not to either. Eddie did several interviews on how helpless he felt when his "best friend" was taken to the hospital as a John Doe. This spurred the nonprofit to add resources for loved ones of addicts too.

Steve had been sober for three years when he went on tour with the band again. For real this time. He got clean and he stayed clean. When he was offered something at a party, he couldn't say he wasn't tempted. But he'd look over to see his love laughing and knew he'd do anything to keep that sound in the world. He never wanted to jeopardize Eddie's happiness again and he finally accepted he was his happiness.

And the next time the band played The Garden, Steve was on the sidelines cheering for Eddie and the band. He made sure Eddie could always see him and know he was safe. That look of guilt and devastation he saw in the hospital never returned to Eddie's face and Steve was determined to keep it that way.

[everestica]

♫ - Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everybody, this post is how some of the characters I liked over the year spend Christmas with you and some (towards the end) what they got you for Christmas! (PS If there is anybody else you would like me to add to this feel free to ask and I might come out with a second part!!) ♫ ---------- ♫ ---------- ♫ ---------- ♫ ---------- ♫ Gepard - He loves being able to sleep in, but since he knows how excited that you are he only chuckles a little when you wake up in the morning and immediately get out of bed to go look under the tree (No matter how old you are you gotta see the gifts in the morning), he'll only sit on the couch holding you close to him as you open each others gifts!

Silver (Twst) - He loves Christmas as much as the next person but CANNOT wake up in the morning for anything 😭 (Que you and Lilia trying to wake him up in the morning) but as soon as he is awake tho expect him to give you your present very fast just in case he falls asleep again (He dose when Lilia is going on about Christmas when he was a kid)

Deuce Spade - Most excited ever, He's more likely one of the first ones up so you never have to worry about him not being awake in time, He will be the first person to hand you a present more specifically the one from him, it's three of his favorite things mixed together, Christmas, presents, and you!

Tachihara Michizou - Manz just doesn't wanna get up in the morning, as much as he loves you he wants to sleep in, but as soon as you do get him up he will be hella excited and drag you to the tree with him, as excited as he is tho he will be super cool and very toned down about the present he got you, and by present I mean Presents (Man has two good paying jobs I mean you can't blame me for adding that in) He actually got (most of) your gifts just though out the year when you had mentioned something in passing. (Idk that shit's the cutest to me, get you a partner who remembers the small stuff 😭)

Akito Shinonome - Again another one who just wants to stay in bed and cuddle all morning but instead of you waking him up, it's Ena. She's was too excited about this to be sleeping any later then like 7 AM. So now the two of you have been dragged out of bed and now starting to cuddle on the couch as people start getting the presents from under the tree, one of the last ones was from Akito. It was a symbol of how the two of you met, at one of his concerts so it was a necklace with a microphone on it and a little charm that had A + (your initial) on it.

Furina - SO EXCITED, Will get up so early and go rushing to the tree to see the presents underneath, loves all the pretty lights and how they illuminate the room and all the wrapped gifts under the tree, at a decent hour though she will go and wake you up by jumping on you, she won't hurt you tho. (Nobody wants to go to the ER on Christmas) Will love opening presents, and loves passing them out as well, but she loves you even more and loves the smile on your face when you see the cute things that she got you!

Hajime Hinata - Again another guy who just kinda chuckles at how excited you are about it, I mean he likes christmas don't get me wrong but he loves your expressions about it much more, though he would never tell you that. Will def let you drag him to the tree and sit him down somewhere (as long as you sit somewhere near him, at least so he can still reach you) Loves seeing you smile at what he got for you at the end though and that's the best gift he could ever ask for.

Blade (HSR) - Seems like he's pissed off all the time standing somewhere behind you as you, Kafka, and Silverwolf all sit down around the Christmas tree and start passing out and opening gifts though one of the last gifts is a smaller box you notice as Kafka hands it to you, smiling, the tag says "To (Name) From Blade." That's why she was smiling, even though you had gotten gift for Blade you didn't expect him to get you one, when you finally opening it and look inside it's a bracelet with his initials and your initials, with coordinates on it. The first place that you two met.

Thoma - He loves christmas and loves spending it with you and the Kamisato siblings, seeing you and Ayaka spending time near the Christmas tree, as Thoma watches over the two of you as Ayato finishes up signing something for the yashiro commission. As he finishes they start getting gifts, one of the middle gifts was a medium sized gift the tag reading that it was from Thoma. As you opened it, there was something small inside it looked exactly like the rope he wore in his hair, and it was. It was a smaller version though one that looked like it was meant for around the ankle or the wrist, which ever one you picked he tied it on for you as a reminder that he was always with you, no matter what.

Malleus Draconia - Loves seeing you excited about the holidays, even if he doesn't fully understand it he will always support you and if you're happy then he is too! He loves watching you open the bunches of gifts that he got you and even loves the gift(s) that you got him, one in particular that stood out was the last one that you had gotten from under the tree. It was known to almost everybody that you stayed in Diasomnia more than 90% of the day since when you didn't there would def be some lighting outside that night. So instead he had gotten you a temporary Diasomnia room card, since you needed magic to get in, so it was infused with magic so you could get in you needed, along with one of the armbands that all the people of Diasomnia wore. It was really a gift for everybody, Sebek and Silver because they would get sort of a break of watching over him if you were always with him, Lilia since he might end up finally getting grandkids, Malleus since he would be able to see you more, You because you wouldn't have to stay in ramshakle all the time and be worried that one day you would wake up without a roof, and everybody else in Diasomnia since they wouldn't have to worry about an angry housewarden.

♫ - Please if you are going to repost any of my works anywhere else, ask permission first! There will be almost a 100% chance that I will say yes as long as you just ask and give credit! Thank you for your understanding!

[neptuneiris]

brooklyn baby (02/?)

we can go back to New York

pairing: rockstar!aemond × fem!reader

summary: you finally see the sexy guitarist again and after going through a disappointing time, things get interesting at a party where the whole band has been invited by Baela.

word count: 8.2k

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hi besties! here's the second chapter i'm so excited for you to read:) can't wait to read your comments, thanks for the amazing reception to the story, i love you guys! enjoy!

warnings: alcohol, smoking, kissing.

If there's anyone who hates the period a lot, it's you.

In desperate times many girls are relieved when it finally happens to them, fortunately you've never had a scare. But you feel completely sick and can't do anything when those days come every month.

Being irregular, you don't know exactly when it will happen, you've tried calculating, assuming and so on, you've even installed period apps, but nothing works. However, you should have known it was coming since you felt slight cramps this morning and since you started getting pimples two days ago.

But with so much to do from college, you didn't have time to prepare. And also a certain guitarist from a certain band wouldn't leave your thoughts alone sometimes.

Since that kiss almost happened, the next morning you were stalking him on Instagram, which is the only social media he has, compared to the remaining members who have Instagram, Twitter and TikTok.

But he's not even active.

The photos he has are only of the band promoting the tour, albums and songs, or also photos of some cities he has visited. He only has two posts with his brothers and cousins, where they are more like random photos before concerts. He has very few pictures of him and you can't even see his face since he doesn't see the camera, in all of them he plays the guitar and nothing else.

There is nothing about his day to day life really, just music. Also you notice that he posts photos every few months, although lately he has been posting more consistently due to the concerts, but it's all about the band.

You go into Aegon's account, trying to find Aemond in his pictures where he's not doing anything related to his guitar, but there's nothing of him if it's not that way. You see how Aegon takes funny pictures and uploads videos with his brother and cousins where they laugh and make jokes, but none of it shows him.

The same on Jace, Luke and Daeron's account, there's nothing from Aemond if it's not band related.

Instantly this catches your attention more, guessing that he most likely doesn't really like social media and keeps himself as private as possible, seeming so different to you, so mysterious and appealing in a ridiculous way simply because of that.

And yet he has many followers, which is understandable, it is obvious why in addition to his music, when he follows at most three hundred accounts, all of them music accounts, he also follows his siblings, his cousins and other people who must belong to his team.

You let out a groan and finally leave Aemond's account in peace, sinking your face into your pillow, feeling the cramps stronger than before, so you try to calm down and seek to feel more comfortable so you can let the pills take effect.

And even when the cramps are less, you still don't feel energetic or up for anything, entertaining yourself on your phone or watching TV, not wanting to leave the warmth of your bed because you really feel terrible.

So when you least expect it, you fall asleep. When suddenly, someone's scream wakes you up.

"Y/N!"

You raise your gaze instantly, startled, as you see frightened and confused Rhaena at the door of your room, entering, watching you in horror.

"W-what... what are you doing here?" you stare at her between irritated and confused now, still sleepy.

"What are you doing like that?" she asks you incredulously and on the verge of collapse to then watch as she looks down the hallway, "Baela, hurry up! She looks awful!"

You watch her seriously.

"Wow, thanks."

"What? What happe-oh shit," Baela also appears, watching you instantly in horror and shock, "W-what... what are you doing?" she looks at you blankly.

"What are you guys doing?" you ask back, irritated, "How did you get in?"

"It can't be, have you forgotten?" Rhaena looks at you incredulously, "Tonight is the concert of your sexy guitarist."

"Yes," says Baela, "Tonight," she repeats terribly serious, "Now can you explain why you're not ready? We have to go now."

"I'm not going," you say grumpily, laying your head back down on your pillow lazily.

"What do you mean you won't going? Are you crazy?"

"You better be kidding me."

"You guys... I'm having a horrible headache right now and I feel like if I get up now I'm going to throw up, not to mention that every breath I take I feel more blood coming out, so could you please leave my room quietly and let me continue sleeping in peace?"

The room falls silent for a moment.

"Oh no, don't tell me that," you hear Rhaena say disappointedly.

And then you listen as Baela complains, also disappointed.

"And you feel very bad?"

"Very," you answer her without hesitation.

"It's your first day?"

"Yes and I feel like shit."

"But Y/N... you can't miss it," Rhaena says worriedly.

"The sexy guitarist gave you the free tickets to see you again," Baela insists too, "I understand you're sick but wouldn't it be rude if you didn't go?"

You let out a huge groan against your pillow and then look at them with a pained expression.

"You think I haven't thought about it too? Of course I have," you let them know sadly, "I'm just as upset as you are, but what am I supposed to do? Everything hurts, I feel awful and besides you want me to let him see me like this with all my greasy, zitty face?"

Baela and Rhaena exchange a look.

"She's right," Rhaena tells her with a look of pity.

And again they both focus on you.

"Okay, we get it," Baela says resignedly, "So is there anything you want to send the sexy guitarist to say?"

"No," you tell her instantly, confused, "I already feel bad enough about not going. I don't want to be so cynical as to tell him I couldn't go but still thank him for the tickets."

And without saying anything else, your cousins don't insist but they are still disappointed since they will have to go to the concert without you.

You really wanted to go, you wanted to see him again and you wanted to spend time with him again like last time, to get to know him a little more and maybe... just maybe, to find out what else could happen between the two of you.

But now, once your cousins leave, you can only go back to trying to sleep, wanting to forget about the world for a while and not think about him or the concert that will happen in another hour that you couldn't attend.

So the hours pass, the sun in New York begins to set and the nightlife in the city begins, which is what characterizes it so much. And yet by the time severe hours have passed, you are still asleep, very tired and your period is not helping you to have any energy, submerged in a deep sleep.

When around two o'clock in the morning, you are again awakened and your peace of mind is interrupted by feeling absolutely nothing. And those responsible? Your cousins again, of course.

"What?" you say completely sleepy, closing your eyes tightly as the light hits you directly when are turned on.

"Wake up, you have to hear this!" squeals Rhaena excitedly, followed by Baela, both invading your bed, each lying on your sides, while you grunt and groan, sinking your face back into your pillow.

"Leave me alone," you plead weakly.

"Stop sleeping already," Rhaena shakes you, "I bet you've slept all day!"

"As I should."

"Y/N, seriously, you must know this," Baela insists as well.

"What? What thing? Talk now so you can leave me alone," you say irritably, still with your eyes closed.

"How mean you are," Rhaena says with a pout

"Let her, she's on her period, it's understandable."

"Then tell her!"

"The sexy guitarist asked us about you."

And that's more than enough for sleep to leave your system and you open your eyes, so you instantly turn to watch your cousins carefully, brushing your hair out of your face and looking completely surprised and now very interested.

"What?" you inquire, watching them intently.

"Yes!" squeals Rhaena excitedly, nodding, "And Baela made out with Jace," she adds innocently.

You open your eyes wide.

"What!?"

"It just happened," Baela shrugs, with a look of superiority, amused, "It was amazing, by the way. We exchanged numbers, too."

"And Aemond?" you ask more than attentively.

"Well, we were talking to Jace and Luke already by the time the after party was over. We were at the bar when Aegon joined us and he was coming with Aemond, so..." Rhaena laughs excitedly, "Jace and Luke were called I think by their manager, so we stayed with the two of them."

"He didn't talk at all, he was just ordering drinks," Baela clarifies.

"Yes and... when Aegon also ordered a drink, he did talk to us, but to ask us about you."

"He asked us where you were and we told him you couldn't come because you were sick."

"And he just nodded and continued drinking," Rhaena finished.

You avert your gaze from both of them for a moment, focusing on your TV, and then dropping your head back onto your pillow, your gaze resigned, so you let out a long sigh and go back to blaming your period for not being able to go tonight.

"But he looked disappointed, we know," Baela assures you with a small smile, "I even felt bad for him."

"Are you sure?" you ask her not really convinced about that.

"Yes, very. If he wanted to hide it, it didn't come out."

You let out a long breath again, bringing your hands to your face, wanting to let go of the frustration somehow, but you can't.

"Oh Y/N, come on, cheer up," Rhaena tells you without wiping off her smile.

"Yes, this is not the end," Baela adds.

"It's not the end?" you repeat confused, "This was literally my last chance to see him again and I couldn't go."

"Stop it, drama queen," Baela says to you again amused, "You've already forgotten Jace?"

"What about him?"

"That he and I are in contact now, silly."

"So?"

"God, I can't handle her," you hear her say to Rhaena.

"Just tell her. That way we'll make her feel better."

"Yeah, just tell me so i can keep sleeping," you tell her too.

You listen as she lets out a long breath.

"The band will be taking a short break. Their last concert will be next Saturday here in Manhattan and Jace has invited us."

She finally tells you and even though you don't show it, you feel interested to hear such news.

"So now you get to see your sexy guitarist," Rhaena tells you with a mischievous tone.

After an exhaustive search through your closet, making combinations with a lot of shirts, skirts, pants and shoes, you finally put together your perfect outfit.

Thank God your period is over and another horrible week of stress, frustration, worry and this time pain is over, until it's finally time to have a good time. And since you're going to the concert, you decide to choose your all black outfit.

You choose a black skirt, a black sleeveless shirt that exposes part of your stomach, black high boots and a black blazer on top. The only colored thing you bring with you is your small white hanging bag. (click)

Your make-up is not too much, but it is elaborate, because you really want to look good. So at the end you apply a matte red lipstick and style your hair in light waves, leaving it completely loose.

You choose silver jewelry and in the end you love the result, seeing yourself with a little smile in your full-length mirror, happy and excited. Then you head to Baela's apartment, which is actually in the same building and in the same hallway as yours.

You both go to NYU, only she studies fashion and you study business management. You always wanted to live alone, you love your privacy and having a place to yourself, so you got your apartment with the help of your parents and Baela joined you shortly after, although it's really like you both live together.

Rhaena just started college months ago and lives with her roomie, Sara, in the dorms provided by the university.

"Wow."

That's the first thing Baela says to you when she opens the door to her apartment and looks as ready as you do.

"Yeah, wow to you too," you tell her laughing.

"Oh my god-you look so hot," Rhaena says to you, appearing behind Baela.

"Thanks, you too, both," you assure them, "So are we leaving or what?"

"In a moment, I'm waiting for Jason to answer my messages," Baela tells you with her phone in her hand.

"Jason?"

"Lannister."

"Jason Lannister?" you repeat confused, "Your friend the rich guy who lives in that huge, fancy apartment in Upper East Side?"

"That same one. He's having an party tonight and I asked him if I could bring the band after the concert is over. The after party will only last an hour and Jace had said that after that they wanted to go out and celebrate."

"Oh," you nod, "Well, that sounds great," you say, as inevitably a wave of excitement washes over you.

"Oh-he has replied!" she says excitedly, her gaze fixed on her screen, "And he said yes!"

"Great! Now let's go, I want to see Luke," Rhaena says desperately, ushering you both out of the apartment.

Driving doesn't take as long as last time, as you literally crossed half of Manhattan in order to get to Brooklyn and also half of Brooklyn in order to get to the club where the concert was.

And once you get to the club, finding parking is a bit difficult but you make it and finally Baela hands the three tickets to the security man to let you in. Once inside, you get the feeling that there are more people than there were in Brooklyn, seeing all the girls very excited and rushing into the club to get to the front of the stage.

You see Baela texting with Jace and the three of them make it to the front, in a seemingly exclusive section with a great view of the entire stage where they are allowed in after she shows security her phone screen.

"What did you show them?" you ask confused and curious.

"Some messages from Jace," she says with a certain superiority, making you laugh and shake your head at the same time.

Rhaena insists that the three of you take selfies and so you do, killing time as the concert begins. The minutes go by, the place slowly starts to fill up, security brings order, everything is ready on stage and after the lights are turned off for a moment, calling everyone's attention, the concert finally starts.

The first to come out is Aegon, clearly, greeting the whole audience and the other guys follow him, causing the excited and euphoric screams of all the girls.

Instantly your gaze focuses on him, on Aemond, making you smile a little as you watch him focus totally on the music, not even looking much towards the audience, taking a seat at one of the speakers, completely focused on his guitar. And again you become totally absorbed in him.

He looks so handsome, like it's not an everyday thing, with his black pants and a plain white t-shirt, making his black electric guitar stand out, while his hair looks as good as ever.

And the way he plays his notes, the way his face concentrates and the way he lights up the occasional cigarette during the concert, he looks completely sexy.

And you are not the only one who notices these details, you see how some girls around you focus the camera of their phones on him, you also hear how some of them scream his name or go crazy in his solos, all wanting to get his attention.

But then again… Aemond doesn't react much with his audience and only gives head gestures, that being enough for him and stay focused on the music. This especially catches your attention a lot, as his behavior is totally different from Aegon or Daeron.

In fact you were hoping that he will manage to see you in the whole audience, as Jace and Baela although they are not far away but not too close either, both still exchange glances and he especially focuses a lot on your cousin most of the time.

Then comes another solo from Aemond, looking extremely sexy in the way he focuses on hitting his notes perfectly, filling the place with more screams. And you watch in admiration, because even if you wanted to, you couldn't play guitar like that.

You see how there is a man with a camera taking pictures of everyone and him especially at that moment on stage, probably being the band's photographer. There are lots of lighting effects, the whole club looks great and they all put on an amazing show, since it's the last one.

You sing and dance along with your cousins, really enjoying the moment, since even though you were suffering all the week before because of your period, you still started listening to their songs and learned them.

You take more videos together, you also take several videos of everything and you may have focused on recording him a little bit more sometimes, unable to help it.

When it's time to finish.

Aegon again takes charge of dismissing the whole band, causing screams and applause from the whole audience towards them, all the girls screaming and throwing bracelets and necklaces on stage. The five of them say goodbye at the same time, Aemond again without showing much emotion and it's all over.

The after party takes place right there, as the club has its own separate pub-like bar section, so the girls with tickets to meet the band are guided, among them you too with your cousins, by security guards to a huge door that will take them there directly.

Upon entering the pub, everything is empty except for the bartender and more security people. The bar is also free and all the girls start getting ready with their t-shirts, caps and posters more than ready.

"I'll meet Jace before he comes out. I'll be right back," Baela says to Rhaena and you, visibly excited.

It's not as if she can be stopped, as she quickly heads down a hallway where you assume must be those break rooms where everyone in the band keeps their stuff while they tend to the fans and where they must all be now.

"Do you think Baela will take him to his apartment when Jason's party is over?" asks you Rhaena with a knowing look.

"Don't even doubt it," you assure her.

Then finally the band starts to come out, causing the screams of all the excited girls, quickly wanting to head towards them, but security instantly starts to bring order, controlling everything and asking all the girls to line up and wait their turn without scandal.

You don't move from where you are, but watch everything carefully, wanting to find Aemond. But it's just like last time… everyone shows up but him.

"Done," Baela suddenly appears with a small smile, "Jace sends his greetings."

"Wow sis, you didn't even sweat," Rhaena tells her amused and you let out a loud laugh which makes Baela look at her serious.

"Very funny."

"And what else did he tell you? Everyone is going to Jason's party?" you ask her interested.

"Everyone or Aemond?"

"Aemond," you answer reluctantly.

"Yes, everyone is going."

"And where is he?" asks Rhaena confused, watching the guys with all the fans, "They are all except him."

"I don't know, he was in that room with everyone, he looked… serious and bored."

"He's hiding, like last time," you say, "Eventually he'll have to come out."

"And you're going to talk to him?" says Rhaena excitedly to you.

"I think so," you nod to her.

"She's going to talk to him," Baela says in affirmative mode, serious and threatening.

Then Rhaena is the one who wants to approach Luke, so she asks you to go with her, while Baela takes the opportunity to order something from the bar, so when you start to wait in line, the wait is long.

Rhaena suddenly starts talking to some girls who are behind you both, also waiting, so you entertain yourself on your phone, killing a little more time, although from time to time you participate in Rhaena's conversation with those girls about the band, their favorite songs and so on.

When you briefly inspect the pub, you notice a platinum-haired person starting to join in, catching your attention. You step aside, as Rhaena obstructs your view a bit, and then finally there he is.

As soon as he leaves the hallway, a bunch of girls rush towards him, all smiling and excited, clearly happy to finally see him, to which the security guys instantly bring order and he starts signing and taking pictures with them.

You watch everything with a small smile, inevitably starting to feel nervous and you don't understand why, since he hasn't even seen you and doesn't even know you are here, but his presence in the same place as you already makes you feel that way.

At that moment your mind starts to plan what exactly you will do to get closer to him, telling yourself that you can choose a poster this time and have him sign it for you, but just thinking about it and such a simple action already makes you terribly nervous.

You think that Rhaena or Baela might come with you, but you don't even have the slightest idea how to start the conversation or what exactly to talk to him about, fearing that your nerves will betray you and you'll act like a fool.

So you also think you might as well do nothing and wait for a miracle to happen and he will notice you.

You let out a long breath, since of course you can't decide to do nothing if the man gave you free tickets and you didn't go to the concert, so this is the least you can do, however, you feel very nervous and you also start to get frustrated.

"There's finally your sexy guitarist," Rhaena says to you suddenly, excited, looking in the same direction as you, "Are you going to go to him?"

"Later, I'm just feeling nervous," you confess to her.

"Relax. When he sees you, he'll probably feel as nervous as you do, too, so you won't be the only one."

You frown.

Aemond nervous? You don't think he's nervous at all.

You can't focus on him anymore because the line starts to move faster, so now you focus on helping Rhaena with the pictures and also to want to see her shyly flirting with Luke, who is also shyly flirting with her.

Rhaena and Luke's moment unfortunately passes quickly, but he still tells her that he will see her at the party, in a whisper obviously, and then the following girls come by to meet him and talk to him.

Then again you focus on Aemond, but you are surprised to see that he is no longer with all the fans around him, he has simply disappeared.

Confused, you start looking around, not understanding where he has gone, bewildered, as it was only a brief moment when he was attending to fans and he should stay longer or not? When you are directing your gaze in all directions, you finally focus on that hallway where he had come out before, finding him.

However, what you see is definitely not what you expected.

You see how he heads to the men's restroom, which is normal, but what catches your attention is how a girl or rather a fan goes after him, not hesitating to follow him. And then they enter the restroom together, as he closes the door behind him.

And it's clear what they both went to do, you're not stupid.

You continue to stand there for a few more moments, staring at the closed door, feeling slightly surprised as you really didn't expect to see him like this and you also begin to feel disappointed.

Unable to help it, sadness and anger come over you, as you also feel discouraged now.

With a sad and disappointed look, also a bit serious, you avert your gaze to head towards the bar, all the while biting the inside of your cheek and trying not to let your emotions show too much on your face, but you cannot.

As you take a seat on the stool, you watch as your cousins are with Aegon, so when you inevitably start to think more about it, disappointment washes over you as well along with everything else you're feeling.

You had expectations of him, but you never expected him to be that kind of guy, that's why you feel so disappointed and you can't help it, not even having the energy to be here anymore.

That's why he offered to give me his merch inside that room in Brooklyn.

You think, since that's why you feel angry, not because you saw him with another girl, but because he wanted the two of them to be alone that one nigh and it happened, the two of them kissed, but what would have happened if Aegon hadn't interrupted you? Probably you two would have fucked, as was his purpose.

You start to feel really bad about that and get frustrated with yourself, because even this you should have expected, yet you didn't even though it was too obvious.

He is absolutely handsome and plays in a band, so he meets a lot of girls almost every day and every single one of them he has at his feet, so… who would be fool enough to say no to him? No one.

You were just going to be another one of the crowd.

You say to yourself, really sad, disappointed and upset.

You want to get out of here but you continue to wait for your cousins at the bar, order a drink just to kill time and try not to think about him, knowing perfectly well that you must have a very cold face.

You let out a long breath, continuing to wait, wait and wait, until Baela and Rhaena appear.

"Hey, did you talk to the sexy guitarist?" asks Baela, excited and interested.

"Yes," you lie, trying to put on your best possible face.

"And what happened?" asks you now Rhaena, also excited.

"I'll tell you later."

Luckily they don't insist and Baela again turns to Jace, so Rhaena stays with you, showing you the photos and videos she took of the concert, also the ones from a few moments ago with Luke, asking her which one is the best to post on her Instagram stories.

You're with her for a while, when you raise your gaze to observe the whole pub for a second, although you unconsciously look towards that hallway as well, when then your breath is cut short and you see how Aemond comes out of there to join the inside of the pub again, with Aegon by his side.

You must have averted your gaze the second you saw him come out, for suddenly Aemond casually glances over to where you are, both of your gazes crossing at that moment.

You don't manage to read his gaze, as again nerves and disappointment wash over you, so you instantly avert your eyes from him and focus back on Rhaena, trying to not let his gaze on you affect you.

However, you can feel how he continues to watch you, his burning gaze completely on you, but you don't respond to him anymore, in fact you feel more the need to get out of here now that he has already noticed your presence.

Out of the corner of your eye you watch as he attends to more fans, while at the same time talking to Aegon, who also attends to fans, but every now and then… you feel his gaze on you again, one that was screaming for you to watch him as well, but you didn't.

"The girls are already leaving."

Rhaena tells you, pointing to the doors and watching as the guards ask the fans who have already had their moment with each member of the band to leave.

"I'll go talk to Luke, I'll be right back," she tells you, starting to get up from her stool.

"Actually," you get up too, stopping her, "I'll go ahead to the party. You and Baela are going with Jace and Luke right?"

She frowns.

"Yes, but…

"Great. I'll see you guys over there then, you tell Baela please."

You start to walk past her, heading towards the doors.

"Wait, Y/N," Rhaena stops you, grabbing your arm, "Are you okay? What happened?" she asks you softly, confused, "I thought you wanted to be near Aemond, did something happen with him?"

You bite your lips, hesitant, as you really don't want to lie to your cousin, but you also don't want to tell her and look so dramatic about it, as it has nothing to do with you but you still feel disappointed and like a fool.

"Yes," you finally tell her, in a whisper "But I'll tell you later."

"You promise?" she looks at you, not entirely convinced.

"I promise," you assure her, "I'll see you there."

She has no choice but to let you go, telling you to call her in case of anything, so you nod and are finally able to walk away, starting to walk out of there with your car keys in hand, not letting go of that burning stare on you until you leave the pub.

At first you thought about deciding not to go to the party, sounding like a good plan for you, however, you were well aware that Baela would kill you and probably never forgive you if you decided such a thing, so now you are here, in Jason Lannister's luxurious apartment and with a bunch of other college students enjoying the party.

As you walk in, you greet a few people you know and also Jason, who asks you about Baela, Rhaena and those guys in that band she told him she was bringing.

You catch up with him, telling him they shouldn't be long and then you notice how all the people here are Baela's friends and also studying fashion, except Jason is studying law, so there are more people from that faculty as well.

You decide to help set up the beer pong tables, just to entertain yourself and start enjoying the party, while you talk to Jason and his friends, when not too long after, a half hour maybe, your cousins with them finally arrive.

You watch them almost from the other side of the huge apartment, watching as Baela greets her friends and introduces the band, where Aegon, Daeron and Jace look more than ready to start enjoying themselves, while Luke stays more calm and relaxed with Rhaena.

And even though you didn't want to, you still inevitably focus on him.

He closes the door behind him with a completely relaxed and unconcerned expression and posture, to your bad luck already having a cigarette on his lips, as he watches the whole party around him, now wearing a different black t-shirt.

And of course, his arrival starts to draw the attention of all the girls at the party and not only on him, on all of them, seeing them with a few small smiles and more than interested.

You avert your gaze, deciding not to make a big deal out of it, continuing to place the plastic cups on the table, though really, it's only a matter of time before Baela finds you, bringing them all with her.

With Jason at your side, she introduces them to him and he starts talking to them, while you continue to set everything up, deliberately ignoring his burning gaze when he sees you, not letting it get to you.

And after that it's only a matter of time before the real party starts.

People start dancing and your cousins along with all of them take a seat on some couches, starting to drink, so it's only a matter of time before Aegon gets up and now he's in a corner making out with a girl mercilessly, just like Jace and Baela, this surprising you but you're very excited for her.

Rhaena and Luke are also in a corner close together, but they're both talking, both with shy but willing little smiles, so you're sure that by the end of the night, something will have happened between them.

And at the end, Daeron and Aemond are still sitting on the couches, both drinking, with one girl already talking to Daeron, both very flirtatious, but you don't approach him.

Wherever you move in the apartment, you feel his gaze on you, always. However, you drink and enjoy yourself, although you don't go over one beer either, since you have to drive. But you admit that his gaze on you makes you very nervous and as much as you don't want to give it any importance, you can't.

Until one moment when you are talking to Jason, just for once you decide to return his gaze, and that's what happens, you look at him and he is already watching you so intensely and with a look between serious and curious.

But the moment doesn't last long, because just when you both exchange glances for two seconds, suddenly a girl appears and takes a seat next to him, starting to talk to him, her intentions clear, so he looks away from you to her.

You look away, finishing what's left of your bottle of beer with just one gulp, then you leave the empty bottle on the kitchen island and decide to go out to the balcony for some fresh air, as the place is getting more and more crowded and it's starting to feel suffocating.

Once outside, you enjoy a bit of the quiet, even though you can still hear some music although this doesn't bother you, as you observe the view offered by some New York skyscrapers around you, looking beautiful and eye-catching.

You don't know how long you last there, but you enjoy it, wanting to take another moment before going back to the party. When suddenly… you must have expected that the moment of the night would come for you and Aemond.

The doors open letting in more music and you turn around, this getting your attention, when again nerves and shame come over you, seeing that it's Aemond. But he is not alone… he enters the balcony along with Aegon, who laughs along with…. Cregan?

"Man, all this stuff I missed if I had gone to college," Aegon says, smiling.

Cregan laughs, giving him a friendly tap on his shoulder.

"Oh dude, you don't know what you're talking about."

When then both of their gazes focus on you, to which you wave your hand and smile a bit apologetically, but not for them, but for him, who continues to stare at you like that.

"Y/N?" inquires Cregan, approaching you, watching you incredulously.

"Hi," you smile at him.

"My godness, I haven't seen you in ages!" he exclaims happily, then locks you in a tight hug.

"Please, it's only been months," you tell him amused, reciprocating his hug.

"It's been years for me," he tells you melancholy, pulling away.

And you both laugh.

"So you know Baela's cousin," Aegon says without wiping away his smile, stepping closer, watching you and Cregan continuously.

"Yes," Cregan says, "You know them?" he asks you, pointing at him and Aemond, who stands apart.

"Baela and Rhaena are hanging out with their cousins," you tell him, nodding.

"Oh yes, the drummer and the bass player."

And you nod.

"And how do you two know each other?" asks Aegon, interested.

"We were classmates in business management," Cregan explains to him, "But I decided to change careers to law."

"At NYU?"

You both nod, as does he, now understanding, while Aemond still continues to stand apart, but at no point do you fail to feel his gaze on you, making you still very nervous but distracting with Cregan at your side.

"I didn't know the three of you knew each other," you decide to say, confused and slightly interested.

"Oh, we didn't know each other," Aegon says.

"We only just met a few moments ago when we played beer pong together," Cregan tells you with a small smile.

And you don't say anything else, that being so random, since the two of them barely met and apparently are now best friends, Cregan and Aegon more than anything, since Aemond continues to be just as serious.

"Anyway, have you seen Alysanne?" asks you Cregan, interested and hopeful.

"Yes, a while ago," you nod to him.

"Great. I'm going to go look for her, I haven't seen her in years either."

"Good luck," you smile at him.

"I'm coming with you," Aegon says instantly following suit, "Maybe your girl has a hot friend she can introduce me to."

Cregan laughs and just as they arrived together laughing and as best friends, they leave, only now you're left alone... with Aemond.

So there it is again… that tense air, but not a bad one somehow, as the both of you are left alone and there is an appropriate distance between the two, but again, you can't help but feel terribly nervous.

And even though you don't want to, still that moment of him going into the restroom with that girl keeps replaying in your mind, unable to help it. And that's why you look everywhere but at him, trying to distract yourself with the view.

Then he starts smoking, both of you without saying a word, just listening to the music and the sound of the city around you, which makes you feel a little uneasy, since you can't just leave like that, it would be too rude.

And again… that almost kiss invades your mind and doesn't leave you in peace, while you bite your lips and try to control your nerves, not having the slightest idea of what to do or what to say.

The slight smell of cigarette reaches your nostrils and you try to act as nothing, just like him, whom you see out of the corner of your eye and apparently, compared to you, he is comfortable and unconcerned.

Until he speaks.

"Are you always this quiet?"

He asks you and you bite your lips again, this making you feel more nervous, as you feel him watching you, but you don't look back at him.

"No," you reply, trying to act just as unconcerned as he does, "I'm just… relaxing."

"Hm," he says and you watch just for a second as he takes a drag on his cigarette, " You don't like parties?"

"Yes, I do," you reply softly.

And there you finally dare to look him in the eye, but you regret it the second you do, as he is already watching you and in that way, again as if he wants to see right through you, so burning and intense. So you steel yourself and continue firm, not letting him weaken you.

"I actually thought you didn't like parties," you decide to say, just to create a topic of conversation.

"I don't like them," he says and exhales smoke through his lips, looking away from you for a moment, "But I wanted to come," he says to return to watching you with such intensity.

And God, all you can think about is how ridiculously handsome he looks tonight, from his clothes, his face, his posture, the way he's looking at you, even the way he's smoking, basically everything about him.

There is a brief silence between the two of you, not uncomfortable fortunately, when suddenly he says to you:

"You didn't go to the concert."

Shit.

And there it is again, the nerves, which makes you look away from him for a moment and bite your lips.

"Yeah, I know, I'm sorry," you tell him softly, "I got sick."

"Yeah," he nods, "Your cousins said something like that. But don't apologize, it's fine."

"But I wanted to go," you clarify.

He places a small grin on his face, watching you intently.

"Did you?"

And you nod.

"At this concert you didn't even stay until the end."

Fuck.

You curse, thinking fast, again with that moment of him and that girl going into the restroom replaying in your mind, which was the reason you decided to leave early and why you decided to ignore him.

But ignoring him didn't work for you anymore since now you're here with him… alone.

"Of course I did, I saw the whole concert," you play dumb.

"I mean the after party."

He tells you softly and you again avert your gaze, terribly nervous, having no idea what to say to him now, since you can't tell him you left because you saw him that way with one of his fans. So instead, you lie, making an excuse about the party.

"I had to come here earlier to help set everything up," you explain, looking at him again, trying to sound convincing.

At this, he lets out a long breath, averting his gaze, bringing his cigarette to his lips.

"What a shame," he says in a sigh, then takes a drag.

This catches your attention, but you say nothing more, only until after you think clearly about what you are going to say before you speak.

"Baela said you're not giving any concerts until about a month," you say and he looks at you again.

"Yes, that's true," he says and you watch as he casually slides further towards you, beginning to close the distance between you, "But you could still come."

You frown.

"To where?"

"To rehearsals and then to the concerts."

At this you say nothing, you just continue to watch him, beginning to have a dilemma in mind about it and also beginning to be affected by how he is gradually moving closer to you, doing it so casually and so calculatingly, without stopping smoking, that you hate that he is already starting to make you feel that way.

You don't want to be another one of the crowd, remember?

Your serious mind tells you, since that's why you were crying before and why you decided to avoid him and get to this party earlier.

But God, you think, since he, everything about him, affects you and so much, so much so that you can't even avoid him anymore, starting little by little to let yourself be carried away by him.

And well says Baela that the flesh is weak.

You think grumpily.

"Or what? You really don't want to see me anymore?"

He asks you with that grin, weakening you more completely and making you more nervous, averting your gaze from him for a moment, really not being able to because of the way he's looking at you and making you react.

"N-no, I mean, yeah," you reply foolishly, "Yeah, okay," you look at him, "I'll go."

Then a small satisfied smile appears on his lips.

"Very well, but if you don't go…"

He begins to say, leaving his sentence in suspense and completely stealing your breath when he finally shortens the remaining distance between the two of you, at the same time as he tosses his now non-existent cigarette away, watching you attentively and determinedly.

You tense up completely and watch him completely attentive and nervous, unable to move, your legs and mind not reacting at all at that moment, starting to feel your heart beating too fast.

"If I don't go what?"

You can formulate in the midst of your nervousness in a mumble, as a distraction, as you inevitably look between his face and his lips with your lips parted.

"If you don't go like last time I'm going to be very angry and very disappointed."

You watch him in complete surprise, just at that instant also realizing how incredibly close the two of you are, the two of you completely invading each other's personal space, his entire presence and essence enveloping you completely.

And then this whole scene, it's just like when you both were about to kiss like last time, close to each other and with that tense air. When Aemond says something to you that steals your breath away.

"It was very rude to leave me waiting, you know that?" he says to you in a hoarse voice, his whole gaze determined and his eye dilated, full of desire.

"Did you really want to see me?" you ask him in a whisper.

"What do you think?"

Again your breath catches, as you focus entirely on him, watching or rather admiring the closeness of his face to yours, not being able to help it anymore, not wanting to pull away and wanting more of him.

Then you know there is no turning back when he raises his hand and places it on your cheek gently, caressing your skin with his thumb, continuing to watch you with that attention and with that desire at the same time that he sticks your chest with his, pulling you to him.

Again you watch his lips, completely absorbed in him, feeling your heart still beating too fast and completely enjoying this moment.

"If I don't see you again Y/N…"

He says again, not letting you go, with that direct, firm and challenging tone from before, but leaves his sentence in suspense again.

"What?" you ask him, wanting to know what's going to happen if he doesn't see you again.

But he doesn't say anything more to you, on the contrary, he starts leaning towards you, making you feel like your heart will jump out of your chest at any moment, when his other hand places it on your waist and the atmosphere changes completely.

And then you close your eyes, letting yourself be completely carried away and finally… you feel his lips touch yours.

And as soon as you feel the contact, you are enveloped by a sensation you haven't felt for a long time and you lift your face a little more towards him, pressing your lips more firmly with his.

A slow but completely purposeful and deep kiss begins, as he moves closer towards you, clinging and you let him, beginning to move your lips more constantly, as does he, as you bring your hands up and place them on his chest.

The kiss is perfect and with exact timing, as you feel him cling to you completely, not wanting to let you go, feeling him pull away an inch to take another angle and kiss you again, as you grab his shirt in a fist and pull him closer to you if possible.

You feel perfectly as he gently bites your upper lip in a way you haven't experienced before but firmly enough to make you gasp into his mouth and he takes the opportunity to enter your mouth, making you gasp in the middle of the kiss and bring one of your hands up to his hair, caressing it.

Now it's a fight, as you feel and hear the sound of saliva every time you move your mouths, being a wet kiss in which neither he nor you want it to end.

Everything about him is completely addictive, he is definitely an excellent kisser and you don't want him to stop, ever, enjoying the faint taste of cigarette and mint in his mouth.

"You're so beautiful, did you know that?"

He pulls away to tell you in a husky murmur, instantly attacking your lips again, never stopping caressing your cheek, at the same time he starts to pull you back until your back hits a table out here, now being trapped between it and his body.

You smile in the middle of the kiss, continuing to caress his neck and cheeks.

"You are so beautiful too, Aemond."

You manage to say between his lips, to again both resume the kiss, while you feel how he holds your waist tightly, which will probably leave marks on your skin since it's too firm, but you don't care.

Then his caresses start to be taken further, bringing his hand dangerously close to your ass, but you don't mind this either. When he suddenly lifts you up and sits you on the table behind you, making his way between your legs and caressing your thigh with one of his hands.

The mood changes completely, the whole air feeling too hot and with a need starting to appear in your lower abdomen.

Aemond caresses your thigh firmly and gently, which begins to bring waves of arousal to your core, especially as he grinds very gently against you, but pressing his hips right there as you hold him between your legs.

You gasp into his mouth, feeling too good and starting to drive you crazy, not only by his movements but also by the way he continues to kiss you, having you perfectly where he wants you.

You begin to feel his clear arousal against your center, as he grunts and continues to kiss you, bringing both hands to both of your thighs, caressing you and grinding himself more firmly and steadily against you, seeking relief, as you do, beginning to feel everything about you pulsing in an achingly delicious way.

However, the good things can't last forever.

Suddenly the doors to the balcony open again unexpectedly and this catches the attention of both of you, breaking the kiss and the moment instantly, seeing that it is a group of apparently already drunk friends, starting to make room for themselves on the balcony as well.

They notice you both but say nothing, going back to their own thing, to which you turn your focus back to Aemond, looking just as disappointed as he does at the interruption of the moment.

His lips are red and swollen, just as you must also look, so you try to get off the table, but he instantly won't let you, pressing his hips right back down there firmly, causing you to watch him in surprise and in alert.

"This is what I'll do the next time I see you if you don't go to the rehearsals and concerts," he tells you again with that determination and that honesty, his voice completely low and hoarse, not letting you go.

And at first you don't understand what he's talking about, still very overwhelmed and shocked by what happened, but mostly because he keeps pressing his hips right against your center.

But you remember what you were talking about earlier.

"W-what?"

Then that grin reappears, her gaze still full of desire and completely stealing your breath.

"I'll kiss you again without permission."

taglist:

@melsunshine @fan-goddess @toodlesxcuddles @helaenaluvr @tsujifreya @queenofshinigamis @manonmccrory @nockerin @iloveallmyboys @at-a-rax-ia

[sihtricfedaraaahvicius]

Plus One chapter 3

Note: a request by @neonhairspray that I managed to write with my beloved Plus One!Sihtric. I suggest to read chapter 1 & chapter 2 first if you haven't yet :) I hope you'll all enjoy this one. also; happy new year!

Warnings: 18+!! some smut, some fluff.

pairing: Modern!Sihtric x you (f)

summary: You asked Sihtric to be your plus one to a Hozier concert.

wordcount: 5,4k

Masterlist

'Will you be my plus one?'

Sihtric muttered something while you batted your lashes at him from across the kitchen. His hair was long and messy, his face rather pale and his heavy eyes were desperately trying to stay open, while he was shirtless yet comfortably looking in just his grey sweatpants.

'Pleaaaase?' you hopped over to him, 'I mean, you even look like him since you grew your hair out,' you grinned.

'What?' Sihtric blinked, dumbfounded, 'is that why you wanted me to grow my hair out again? So I could look like some… some random dude?'

'He's not some random dude, okay,' you said, annoyed, 'his name is Andrew.'

'Andrew? I thought his name was Hozier.'

'That's one of his names, and his stage name-'

'Andrew,' Sihtric scoffed, 'I don't look like Andrew,' he said, mocking the name.

'Siht,' you groaned and pouted, 'please, babe, please be my plus one to the show?'

Sihtric sighed as he stirred his coffee, then raked his fingers through his loose hair and shuffled to the couch while he was still waking up.

It was a Sunday morning, the last day of the year. Your boyfriend was trying to deal with his hangover from the previous night of going out drinking, and getting awfully close to that Mc Donald's he was banned from, while you had been going on and on about some concert as soon as he had opened his eyes half an hour ago.

'Why do you want to go and see that Andrew guy so badly anyway?' he asked as he sat down on your couch.

'Because,' you plunged down next to him, 'he's my favourite artist and I won free tickets. Free! I never win anything and now I won two tickets! Come on, it will be fun. You know the music and you said you even liked it-'

'Honey,' Sihtric interrupted and rubbed his forehead as a headache taunted him, 'just because we bang to his music doesn't mean I enjoy the music. You really think I actually pay attention to the music when I'm railing you?'

You clicked your tongue and rolled your eyes.

'Look, the show is until eleven, so we're home by midnight again and we can even stop by Mc Donald's. You have two options, we're either going to see Hozier's new year's eve show together, or we spend the entire evening at my parents' house. And you know how much my mom loves you-'

'Fine!' Sihtric huffed, 'I'll be your plus one.'

'Yay!' you squealed and wrapped your arms around his neck to kiss his cheek, 'but we still have to stop by my parents before we go to the show.'

'Oh, come on!'

Much to your mother's disgrace, you and Sihtric had been a couple for almost a year now. Every time she saw your boyfriend she had flashbacks to that time she walked in on him in your bedroom, while he was on your bed with his legs spread, completely naked, after which she had fainted. And to make everything even worse, Sihtric had indeed gotten your name tattooed on his body, just like he had told your mother before she ran out of the house that same day. You had been rather shocked at the sudden reveal of your name on the front of his left hip, one of the few spots he hadn't fully inked yet by then, but you had known Sihtric for quite some time and knew he was as impulsive as he was smitten with you. So you had just accepted the fact that you'd see your own name whenever you'd get down on your knees for him, which was rather often, and you grew to love the idea that you had sort of claimed him that way. And Sihtric was proudly showing off your name on his body too whenever he took a shirtless mirror selfie for his instagram, pushing his boxers down just far enough.

Your mother already wasn't Sihtric's biggest fan since she first met him, at the wedding of your aunt and uncle when you only pretended to be a couple, but she thought he looked even more like the savage that he was, according to her, when he grew out his hair over time. She thought he was "alright" when he had it braided or tied back, but she couldn't stop giving him disapproving looks when he just had it loose. And unfortunately for your mother, it was your favourite look, so when you visited them before going to the concert, his hair was loose and looking rather wild as the wind had blown through his locks when he got out of the car.

When you visited your parents to wish them an early happy new year, your mother couldn't stop glaring at Sihtric, as she felt like he had put in no effort whatsoever to try and look decent. You noticed she was giving Sihtric the side eye the entire time you were there. Her left eye twitched at the sight of his hair and his half unbuttoned black blouse, which showed off his Mjölnir pendant, the tattoos on his chest and also those on his arms, as he had the sleeves rolled up. She shuddered at the sight of his black skinny jeans and the way he was manspreading right across from her, which made her think of that awful time she walked in on him, and she swallowed hard at the thought of what a creature like him would do to her innocent daughter. His black leather boots with the untied laces was something she just sighed and rolled her eyes to, and the way he was eating all the snacks that were placed on the salon table made her feel sick, for she still thought he ate like a pig, and she wasn't completely wrong about the eating part. She excused herself to the bathroom, and as your father was occupied by watching a Rolling Stones concert on tv, you looked at your boyfriend who sat beside you.

'Sihtric,' you hissed quietly as you kicked his ankle, 'stop shoving down the food like that.'

'Like what?' Sihtric asked, offended, with his mouth full while he held two more slices of bread in one hand and a cheese spread in his other, 'I'm hungry, babe.'

'You're always hungry,' you sighed, 'how you are keeping your body in shape is simply beyond me.'

'It's because of the lots of sex with you,' Sihtric shrugged, which unfortunately your mother heard as she had entered the room again and froze.

'Oh,' you gasped when you saw her, then coughed, 'I- I…,' you cleared your throat awkwardly while Sihtric stuffed his mouth once again, and you decided to get yourself a drink.

'Can you pour me some wine, honey?' Sihtric asked, again with his mouth full.

'No, you can't drink,' you said, 'you're driving.'

'What?' Sihtric scoffed, 'you mean I have to endure that Andrew guy and I can't even drink?'

'You know very well that I hate driving in the dark, babe,' you smiled and blew him a kiss, then poured him some water instead of the wine he asked and longed for.

'Andrew?' your mother frowned.

'Hozier, mom. Sihtric is just jealous of some guy I can never have,' you said as you made your way back to Sihtric.

'Hozier,' your mother said as she followed and sat down, 'I have heard of him. Didn't he have that song about Church?'

'Yes,' you nodded.

'A fine Christian man,' your mother smiled, satisfied that her daughter listened to such decent music.

Sihtric looked up and furrowed his brow.

'Honey, isn't that song about-'

'A fine Christian man,' you agreed as you kicked Sihtric's ankle again. Your mother did not need to know the truth about that song.

'Yes, he is,' your mother continued, 'I saw him on tv the other day, what a handsome man.'

'He is,' you agreed, 'hey, mom? Don't you think Sihtric looks a little like Hozier?'

Your mother stared at your savage looking boyfriend, who sat back and rubbed his stomach with a proud smile after he just finished the last snack that was on the table. She looked him up and down and made a face as she noticed the similar hair and his facial hair.

'No,' she lied curtly and then looked straight at the tv, 'ah, the Rolling Stones,' she changed the topic and nudged your father, who hadn't heard a single word of the conversation.

'Well,' you said and got up, 'we better get going. We still need to drive to the venue for the show.'

You walked up to your parents to give them a hug and wished them a happy new year. And as you went to grab your coat out of the hallway, Sihtric shook hands with your dad, who gave him a smile and a nod, and he then pulled your mother in for a tight hug, to which she almost yelped. Sihtric squeezed her in his arms with a grin and then pressed a long kiss to her cheek, and when he leaned back to see her reaction he noticed she had turned pale.

'Happy new year, mommy,' Sihtric winked, and your mother quickly grabbed onto the armrest of her chair when she felt herself on the verge of fainting again and dare she say; feeling violated at the touch of him.

'Crap,' you hissed when you stepped inside the venue.

The place was packed, which wasn't a surprise, as Hozier only played sold out venues you knew. But you had no idea it would be this crowded already when the support act was still on stage, and Sihtric frowned when he saw the disappointment on your face. He was content with the spot you were both in; it was close to the bar and he could see more of the stage than he really wanted, but when he lowered himself to look from your eye level he understood you couldn't see a thing. He looked at the bar, which was on his right, and back to you on his left, and then he sighed. He circled his arm around your waist and pulled you in so you could hear him over the music.

'Don't give me that face, sweetheart,' he said in your ear and took your hand, 'let me get a drink first, okay?'

Sihtric held your hand as he looked at the list of non-alcoholic drinks and he pouted slightly at the sight of it, to which you sighed and nudged his elbow.

'Fine, I'll drive us back home so you can have a beer or two.'

'Or five,' Sihtric mumbled.

'What?' you yelled.

'One day I'll make you my wife,' Sihtric yelled back and gave you a hug.

He ordered three beers, which he could barely carry without spilling, and one water for you. He quickly downed one beer and you already knew you were in for a night. Sihtric held his arm out to you and you grabbed onto his bicep, and he guided you further into the crowd, closer to the stage, until you told him you could see everything quite good. 

When the support act was over, and Sihtric already finished his second beer, he noticed he got quite some attention from both men and women in the surrounding crowd. At first he thought he was already tipsy and was just imagining things, but then you noticed it too and you couldn't hold your laugh when you saw his confused face.

'I told you,' you chuckled, 'you look like Hozier with your hair down like this. And your facial hair doesn't help either.'

'Is that why people are looking at me?'

'I'm pretty sure that's the reason, yep,' you grinned and wrapped your arms around him as he took the first sip of his last beer. 'They can look,' you said, your lips grazed his ear, 'but you're all mine,' you bit his ear lightly and gave his ass a quick squeeze, to which Sihtric almost choked on his drink.

'Hey, easy,' he coughed and placed his hand on the side of your neck, then leaned in, 'or I'm dragging you back to my car.'

'To do what?' you taunted as you moved your hands under his half open blouse.

You bit down on your lip and gave him an innocent, questioning look while you trailed your hands up and down his muscular, tattooed chest.

'You know I'm always hungry,' Sihtric smirked, 'and you know you're my favourite meal.'

'Oh, really?' you smiled.

'Really,' Sihtric smiled back, and he pulled your lips onto his.

You were both too caught up with each other to even care that everyone around you was probably disgusted by the way you devoured each other, and you only broke the kiss because you heard the crowd cheer and noticed the lights went out. You quickly turned to face the stage and left Sihtric hanging, and he already held a grudge to your favourite artist for that alone. Regardless, Sihtric wrapped one arm around your waist and pulled your back against his chest, and he enjoyed the rest of his beer while you looked at the stage.

You held your breath when you heard the melody to De Selby (part 1) and you screamed your lungs out with the rest of the crowd when Hozier played De Selby (part 2) right after. Sihtric shook his head lightly at the fact you screamed at the sight of a man that wasn't him, but his mind got carried away when he suddenly recognized the song that was being played. You didn't see Sihtric's sly smile behind you when he remembered the melody of the song that had been playing only a few days ago, in his kitchen, when you stayed over at his place. He remembered hearing the beat vaguely in the background while his head was between your thighs and his tongue dragging the sweetest sounds out of you. He got lost in his thoughts for a song or two, happily remembering all the intimate and sexy moments he had shared with you, until he got pulled back into the moment when he suddenly recognized another song; From Eden.

Something so wholesome about you…

Get closer to me…

Sihtric pulled you closer against him, feeling your hips sway lightly to the beat, and he smiled again as he buried his face in your neck, leaving soft kisses on your skin while you enjoyed the music. You didn't mind Sihtric was basically touching you up while you were watching and listening to your favourite musician. You loved the fact that the music you were now hearing live, with your boyfriend's arms around you, was tied to your most vulnerable moments with him, and it was simply a special and wholesome moment for you. And when To Be Alone was played you turned to face Sihtric, who had finally finished his last drink, and you wrapped your arms around his neck.

'Dance with me,' you said in his ear, and he gladly obeyed.

Sihtric placed his hands on your waist and leaned his forehead against yours, following your lead as you slowly moved your feet to the beat. You slow danced to the tune that filled the arena, and when Sihtric heard the words to the chorus he smiled when another memory played in his head.

It feels so good, girl, it feels so good…

Oh, to be alone with you…

'Do you remember this one?' you smiled as your lips grazed his ear again.

'How could I forget?' Sihtric chuckled, and his hands moved down to your buttocks, 'the way you sucked me off during that roadtrip while this song played was out of this world.'

You gave him a cheeky smile and ran your hands over his tattooed chest again, up his neck, and you pushed yourself up your tiptoes to kiss his lips. 

The first half of the concert was just perfect, and Sihtric wasn't really bothered being there either as he enjoyed the memories and seeing you smile. Until he noticed it became harder to draw your attention, and he stared at Hozier for a good few minutes with an unamused look on his face. He hated that he now sort of began to understand what you meant when you told him he kind of looked like Hozier. The hair was right, but just not as long, and his facial hair got close to that of the Irish singer too. Sihtric was tall, but Hozier was undeniably taller, which didn't bother him really because he knew he was way more muscular than that guy with his guitar. Sihtric felt himself become bitter with each cheer you gave the guy, and soon he started to roll his eyes and fake yawn every time Hozier did or said something that made the arena scream their lungs out, which included you. Sihtric just wasn't impressed anymore, he was hungry. He was hungry for you… and for some Mc Donald's. 

While you enjoyed the rest of the show Sihtric took out his phone and kept one arm around you, wanting to keep you close and also out of fear that you'd run to the stage and climb that tree of a man up there. He did a quick google search and saw that the Mc Donald's on the way back home was open past midnight, even on new year's eve, and he already couldn't wait to get out of the venue and order dozens of nuggets. But when Sihtric saw the time, he realised he had at least another half hour of watching the love of his life look at that Andrew dude with hearts in her eyes, and he just wasn't having it. 

He became rather oblivious to the music, which was also what always happened whenever you two were intimate while the music played, and you felt his hands roam over your body. You enjoyed his warm touch and the feeling of his lips on your neck and shoulders, all while you kept your eyes on the other long haired man in front of you, and a quick fantasy of a threesome made your knees weak. It was only when you felt Sihtric's hand slide up under your skirt that you suddenly snapped back to reality and turned around.

'Babe,' you chuckled, 'what are you doing? We're in public.'

'Then let's get out of here,' Sihtric murmured in your ear, 'hm? Let's fuck in my car, honey bun.'

'What? No! The show's not over yet.'

You gave him a confused look and attempted to turn around, but Sihtric stopped you and grabbed your face, gently.

'I'll give you a show,' he said before he kissed you hard.

'Honey,' you laughed and took a slight step back, 'I know you will. But the concert is almost over, okay? We'll leave right away. Just let me enjoy this.'

You turned your back to Sihtric, who huffed and clenched his jaw while he glared at the man on stage. He wrapped his arms around you again and held you firmly pressed against his chest as his lips found your ear.

'You keeping those heels on for me tonight, bunny?' he husked.

You shook your head and rolled your eyes at his desperate attempt for attention, but you were determined to see this show til the very end, so you didn't respond. Which only riled your infamous boyfriend up even more. He trailed his hand down your arm, took your hand and guided it behind your back. He pressed the palm of your hand against his crotch, where you felt his hardening cock.

'Keep looking at that guy,' he almost hissed in your ear, 'but remember it'll be my name tonight which you'll scream, sweetheart,' he grinded slowly against your hand as he held it in place, and he squeezed your hip with his other, 'it'll be my hair you will be pulling-'

'Sihtric,' you sighed and gave him a light shove, 'baby, please, I just want to enjoy the concert. Yes, I want you too, but not right now, I mean… come on,' you cocked your head towards the stage, towards Hozier.

You scoffed and shrugged before you turned your back to him again, and Sihtric cursed silently at the guy who kept stealing your attention away from him. 

And even when the show was finally over, Sihtric was still in a mood.

'I can't believe it's always a nightmare to get out of the parking lot,' you groaned behind the wheel of Sihtric's car.

Sihtric didn't reply, he just sat with his arms crossed next to you as he stared out of the window. And to make it worse, you switched on the radio and decided to play some more Hozier. Sihtric huffed and switched off the radio, to which you rolled your eyes and switched it back on again. The on and off game continued for a few long seconds until you had enough.

'Sihtric!' you snarled and switched the music on again, 'stop it!'

'It's my car, sweetheart,' he hissed and pressed it off again.

'You've got to be kidding me,' you muttered as you pressed the on button, and you slapped his hand when Sihtric tried to switch the music off again. 'Stop being such a baby!'

'You're a baby,' Sihtric mumbled.

'Gods, are you drunk?'

'No.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes.'

'Then you have no excuse for this childish behaviour.'

'Oh, sorry I'm not a real man, like Andrew.'

'So that's what this is,' you scoffed, 'you're not seriously jealous of a musician, are you?'

Sihtric kept his eyes locked on the blocked parking lot exit and he didn't say a word.

'Sihtric!' you chuckled, albeit annoyed, 'answer me.'

'I saw the way you looked at him,' he huffed.

'For the love of… Siht,' you took his hand, 'yes, I think Hozier is handsome, and… sure, I wouldn't mind a night with him,' you giggled, to which Sihtric clenched his jaw and flared his nostrils, 'along with you, obviously,' you added.

'A threesome?' Sihtric made a disgusted face, 'with Andrew? The fuck not. But, yeah, I'm in a mood because of him. And I'm hungry. Happy now?'

You snorted at his confession and turned up the volume when the next Hozier song started to play through the speakers. And when after several minutes there was still no movement in the rather dark and packed parking lot, Sihtric took a deep breath and unbuckled his seat belt.

'That's it,' he snarled, and he suddenly reached for the handle under your seat, which he pulled and with one swift move he pushed your seat back as far as he could.

'Sihtric?!' you yelped as you felt yourself rush backwards in your seat, and before you could even blink you felt your seatbelt loosen after Sihtric had unbuckled it, 'what are you doing?!'

'Getting what I want,' he growled while he climbed over to your side and knelt down in front of your seat.

'What-' you were interrupted as Sihtric quickly pushed the backrest of your chair down as far as possible, and before you could ask what was going on, you felt his warm, rough hands move up your thighs and push your skirt up. He then grabbed your legs and pulled you closer.

'Babe!' you giggled with wide eyes when Sihtric pulled your panties down. 

You were glad it was raining outside so the windows were rather blurred. And you immediately surrendered when you felt his tongue delve between your folds, pleasing and teasing you in all the right ways, and your hands moved automatically into his long hair as you closed your eyes and enjoyed your boyfriend as well as the music.

You moaned and cursed under your breath when you felt your climax built, as your savage looking boyfriend devoured you in his car while Hozier was blasting through the speakers.

There's nothing sweeter than my baby…

I'd never want once from the cherry tree…

'Cause my baby's sweet as can be…

'Fuck,' you breathed, 'Siht, please,' you moaned and pulled his hair.

'That's right,' Sihtric breathed and locked your thighs tighter with his strong arms, 'say my fucking name, bunny,' he growled and brought his lips back on you again.

'Gods, f-fuck,' you cried as he pushed you over the edge, and his name fell from your lips like a prayer.

You tried to catch your breath while you looked down into Sihtric's eyes, who gave you a satisfied and cocky look. He then wiped his lips with his thumb and licked it clean before he leaned in to give you a passionate kiss. He quickly dressed you decently again and moved back to the passenger seat. He put your backrest back up and pulled the handle under your seat to pull you back towards the wheel again, and he sat back in his seat while you still tried to catch your breath. He took a sip of water from the bottle he kept in his car and cleared his throat.

'The traffic cleared, you can drive, love,' Sihtric said, as if nothing had happened.

'Y-yeah,' you panted and grabbed his water bottle for a sip too, then you started the car.

'Hey,' Sihtric said before you hit the gas, and he took your chin, 'I love you, baby,' he almost whispered.

'I love you too, honey,' you smiled shyly.

'Good,' he smiled and pecked your lips, 'wanna stop by Mc Donald's for me, doll?'

'Of course, baby,' you said and pinched his cheek, 'if you promise to behave.'

'I promise, love.'

'Why did you drive by that Mac?!' Sihtric startled you as he suddenly raised his voice, and with disbelief he watched the glowing M pass by, 'babe?!'

'Really?' you hissed, 'that's the one you're banned from!'

Sihtric looked back at the restaurant and realised you were right, and he decided to not respond, so he just cleared his throat and sat in silence while you took a detour to a different Mc. You pulled up at the drive through intercom, and before you could speak Sihtric already leaned over to your side and nearly hung out of the window to order his beloved chicken nuggets.

'Ah, I'm sorry, sir,' the intercom voice said, to which you buried your face in your hands, 'we're out of nuggets. But I can offer you the chicken burg-'

'No!' Sihtric shouted, 'it's not the same!'

'Honey, please-'

'Sir-'

'I want my goddamn- you just wait!' he yelled, then paused as he started to take off his seatbelt.

'Babe!' you yelled, 'what are you doing?!'

'Getting my fucking nuggets!' Sihtric yelled as he kicked open his car door.

'Sir, we don't have any-'

'Baby, no!' you shouted, but he didn't hear you as he slammed the door shut and stalked to the restaurant entrance.

You quickly unbuckled your belt, 'I'm so sorry,' you said towards the intercom as you jumped out of the car and ran after Sihtric, who was already halfway across the parking lot.

You managed to grab his arm in time and pulled him away before he could set foot inside.

'Sihtric, think!' you said firmly, 'you want to get banned here too?!'

'I want my chicken!'

'I know! But they don't have it! Come on, please,' you groaned and pulled him back to the car, 'please, just… get in the car and I'll drive back to the other one.'

Sihtric cursed as you pulled him back to his car, then shouted something at the driver behind you who had honked, and you mouthed an 'I'm sorry' to the driver before you got in the car again.

'You really need to work on your anger issues,' you snarled as you backed up and drove back to the mainroad.

'And they really need to work on their food stock!'

'Be quick, it's only ten minutes until midnight,' Sihtric said when you parked at the Mc Donald's he was banned from.

'I will. But I can't promise you any nuggets, okay?' you said as you grabbed your purse, 'and stay in the car!'

'Yeah, yeah,' Sihtric said impatiently.

He enjoyed the sight of your ass when you got out of the car and he was quick to give you a firm slap before you closed the door. You glared back at him as you walked to the entrance, and Sihtric waited anxiously as you disappeared into the restaurant. It seemed to take forever for you to reappear again, when in reality it had only been a few minutes, and he nervously bit his nails while he waited. When the silence became too much he switched on the radio, and Hozier blasted through the speakers again as your phone was apparently still close enough to reach the signal.

'Fucking guy,' Sihtric huffed and switched the radio off again, then grabbed his phone.

Sihtric: get me a milkshake too baby girl???

You: strawberry?

Sihtric: please xxxx

Sihtric stared at his phone and saw the minutes pass by, and there still was no sight of you coming back. There were only a few minutes left before midnight now, and he would lose his mind if you weren't by his side when the clock struck 12.

Sihtric: hurry baby it's almost midnight

You: I know, it's busy here I'm sorry

Sihtric: hurryyy

Sihtric: I need my midnight kiss :( 

Sihtric: and nuggets…

Sihtric babyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!

His heart stopped when he saw the clock turn to 00:00. Sihtric then looked up at the entrance, which you walked out of as soon as fireworks were set off in the surrounding neighbourhoods, and he watched you in awe as you neared his car. You seemed to move in slow motion for a moment, and his jaw dropped at the sight of you; your hips swaying as you walked, holding a milkshake in one hand while you held up a big box of chicken nuggets in your other, all while fireworks exploded in the sky above you. And Sihtric thought it was the most magical thing he had ever seen.

You jumped in the car and quickly handed Sihtric his order while he still stared at you with big eyes, and then you grabbed his face and kissed his lips.

'Happy new year, darling,' you whispered as you smiled against his lips.

'Happy new year, my love,' Sihtric murmured before he kissed you again, and then he turned his attention to the box of freshly fried nuggets in his lap.

'Happy now?' you chuckled when you saw his smile.

'Very,' he said and kissed your cheek, then offered you his milkshake, which you gladly accepted.

You both sat in his car at the Mc Donald's parking lot, watching the fireworks explode up in the air as you held hands. You sat in silence for a moment while Sihtric finally ate his nuggets and you enjoyed his milkshake. Then you switched the radio on again, and as expected, Hozier played once again but this time Sihtric didn't seem to mind it.

'It's so beautiful, baby,' Sihtric whispered after a moment.

'I know, love,' you smiled as you stared up at the fireworks.

But then you looked over at your boyfriend, and your smile faded as a look of disappointment took over when you saw he was staring at his chicken nuggets, and you swore he wiped a tear as he looked at his food.

'So perfect,' he whispered and squeezed your hand as he dipped a nugget in the curry sauce before eating it.

You decided to not say anything and you looked back up again, out the window, enjoying the fireworks. Until Sihtric suddenly held a nugget in front of you.

'You want one?' he asked.

'Really?' you asked, and felt yourself tear up at the fact that he suddenly shared his precious chicken nuggets with you, 'thank you,' you smiled and ate the chicken, then leaned over to his side to rest your head on his shoulder.

'You're welcome,' he said, his mouth stuffed with nuggets.

'I love you.'

'I love you more.'

'How much more?'

'More than chicken nuggets, sweetheart,' he said softly.

'Really?' you frowned and looked up at him.

'Really,' he smiled and kissed your forehead.

'Well,' you chuckled, 'I love you more than Hozier.'

'Really?'

'Really, babe.'

'I fucking knew it,' Sihtric said and gave you a cocky smile, 'that Andrew guy has got nothing on me.'

taglist: @clairacassidy @finanmoghra @uunotheangel @hb8301 @bathedinheat @neonhairspray @anaeve @bubblyabs @travelingmypassion @sylasthegrim @andakth @chompchompluke @willowbrookesblog @lady-targaryens-world @skyofficialxx @elle4404 @alexagirlie @sweetxime @solango @gemini-mama @cheyennep3107 @little-diable @jennifer0305 @drwstarkeyy @mrsarnasdelicious @verenahx @urmomsgirlfriend1 @moonchildrenandflowercrowns @foxyanon @djarinsgirl27 @sigtryggrswifey @liandav @diiickbrainn @sihtricsafin @lexwolfhale @dixie-elocin

[reesespeanutbutterfuck]

she says, “babe, you look so cool.”

(ren honjo x reader)

told tales about your confusing relationship with the trapnest's notorious calm demeanoured guitarist, ren honjo.

content warnings: mentions of sex, allusions to sex, black stones vocalist!reader, pregnancy, mention of reader having a panic attack, mention of ren’s substance abuse, smoking, reader with avoidant attachment, ren with abandonment issues, mutual obsessiveness, mutual possessiveness, toxic relationship, miscommunication, takumi is an asshole as always, spoilers for NANA

songs: robbers - the 1975, habits (stay high) - tove lo, bonnie & clyde - DEAN, casual - chappell roan, creep - radiohead, every girl gets their wish - saint avangeline

—

you cannot explain your relationship with ren honjo.

you'd say it's...

anything but ordinary.

even before he left for tokyo, he doesn’t toss you away after you have sex. like how he should.

you’d often wake up in the morning wearing one of his button ups or jackets that smell just like his musky cologne and seven stars cigarettes.

he clothed you so you won’t catch a cold.

even then, ren buys you a lot of gifts and lacy lingeries.

when he notices your eyes linger longer on a vivienne westwood necklace, the next day, it’s yours.

he gave you a cryptic necklace that spells venus.

he worships you like a goddess, hence, venus.

his venus.

you get the cigarette from his mouth and put it on yours. he gets it back and stubs it. he's always been like that. he stubs out his cigarettes whenever you’re with him so you don’t inhale the smoke, even if you smoke too.

in amidst of the chilling dawn, you wonder, why isn’t he dating anyone and seeing some other woman that doesn’t always run away from your feelings like you do?

you tell ren to fool around with other girls and enjoy his youth.

he still doesn’t anyway. 

he stays over at your house in the weekends and when he has to leave early he leaves you something to eat. with a note reminding you of the things he remembered in your schedule today that you told him the night before.

he cares about your well-being more than you do.

why?

why does he care so much?

everytime you have sex, your primary feeling, or so you think is always nothing but lust. desire. 

but ren… 

ren’s is love. 

why is he filled with this much love for you? 

why doesn’t he give up on you?

ren is always one call away.

remember that one night when you were having a panic attack and was breaking down?

with one dial on his number, he picks up.

after hearing one muffled sob from your line, because you couldn't form even a single word from weeping, he's dashing towards his car in the middle of a heavy rain with nothing but a shoulder for you to lean on.

you hate how he laughs it off whenever you insult him to stave him away from you. you don't really want to push him away, but your avoidant nature leads you to. he knows you don't mean it.

even when you saw him again after he moved to tokyo, his eyes always had a way of finding you amidst the crowd.

that night after trapnest's concert he found you backstage. everything was a blur after. you shouldn't even be here because seeing trapnest's ren honjo with black stones' [y/n] would make a lot of headlines and destroy his image, yet ren doesn't care.

why is he ready to risk everything just to keep you around?

everything happened quickly. how he pulled you to the side away where no one hears or sees, how you ended up in his house, how he hugged you for the first time after years.

“[y/n], i lo–” you cover his mouth.

“don't. don't say anything.”

he removed your hand from his mouth. “i love you.”

“i said don’t!”

“i get high just to keep my mind off you. you’re only one i want and desire. i love you. i’ve always had–” you cut him off with a kiss.

and then it so happens that one kiss turns into a passionate one, and leads to another, and another.

it was hard to stop.

he was addictive.

maybe the fact that he acts up on the way he wants you, added to the passionate warmth he ignites inside you. something no one has ever made you feel because everyday the universe reminds you you were always unwanted and that's all you'll ever be.

the following morning, you hear a soft moan from his lips while you were sitting on the corner of his bed and buttoning your clothes that were discarded on the floor last night, careful not to wake him up. when you were about to stand up, you felt ren’s hand tugging yours. he didn't say anything, he just held your hand.

“i'm sorry, did i wake you up?”

“stay…” there was something somber in ren's eyes.

“you know i can’t.”

so he lets go of your hand with a forlorn smile.

he expected it, and he understands. yet somehow, he still hopes… he hopes you would.

from there, everytime you leave in the morning after a long night of multiple rounds of sex, he hugs the sheets smittenly to pretend like you were still there. it still smells like you.

yasu and the others eventually found out you and ren were seeing each other like that again.

yasu knows way more than he shows. you know he does. he knows about ren's strong regard for you. you didn't. you pretended not to.

which is why you were shocked when nobu's tongue slips and he accidentally blathers, “ren wanted you for so long. it’s crazy. all of these years and yet still you’re the only one he wants and ever wanted. did you cast a love spell on him or something?”

you think about what nobu said a million times everyday.

so much that you wish you hadn't heard it.

you once stayed in ren's unit the morning after for the first time while he went out and answered the door on takumi while wearing one of ren’s white shirts and boxers. you called ren's phone to let him know his bandmate’s here. ren told you to stay there and he’ll be coming as fast as he can. he knows you and takumi do not get along.

takumi sat across you on ren’s couch. “so, what's your relationship with him?” came his condescending question. you can tell he was looking down on you.

what, indeed?

“what's it to you?” you answered with the same monotonous tone.

the truth is, you don't have any idea either.

months continued on with you and ren in that set-up. he's still the same calm and goofy ren you knew.

he still remembers every single thing about you. your scent, your favourite food, music, everything.

then ren came with the question you're most afraid of hearing.

“what… are we?”

ren batted an eye up at you while he was hugging your torso and sitting on the bed while you were straddling his lap.

you searched for an answer.

ren took the long silence and your visible uneasiness as the same answer he got from you over the years.

“i’m always up to take this in the long run. but it’s okay if you don’t want to.” as long as you're here, with me. he buried his face on your chest and you two forgot about it.

maybe takumi was right, you’re just using ren.

he’s okay with that.

this is so wrong.

how could he be that cruel to himself?

ren still reminds you to eat. some habits die hard, no?

whenever he eats with you, he even sanitizes your hands for you, with his own hands rubbing yours to spread the sanitizer.

“stop coddling.” you snatched your hand away from him.

ren chuckles, “okay, sorry.”

he keeps an eye on you in band practices. you tell him to stop distracting himself with your presence or you'll leave. he obliges, but he won’t hesitate to step in if some creep bothers you.

he's possessive of you even if he doesn't show it openly.

but somehow you’re so possessive of him too.

when you saw a girl touching his shoulders, you wanted to chop her hand off.

“i’ve been deprived of everything my whole life. now, even my ren?” ren overhears you talking to yourself. your ren, huh?

“i’m sorry, ren.” you pecked a kiss on his lips after you told him to date other girls after you got jealous. “will you forgive me?”

he pulls you into a hug, “it’s okay, i forgive you.” he kisses your cheek. “i never said i don’t love you anymore.” he kisses the side of your neck. “why are you giving me away, anyway? if you’re jealous, be jealous. tell me and i’ll do something about it. don’t give me away like that.” he kisses the side of your head.

such big words for someone who is afraid of communication himself, thought ren.

he’s subtly affectionate to you in public places like when he lays his head on your lap in standby backstage and one of the members of the management asks nobu if you’re dating in which nobu answers “it’s complicated.”

you always turn him down whenever he asks you to stay, but once, he said “i could never refuse you.” while patting your head and hugging you after when you asked him to stay the night.

you brushed his hair up and planted a kiss on his forehead.

i love you, ren.

three words you can’t say. 

rather, words you’re afraid to say.

ren was always very open with the idea of having a kid with you. but he wouldn’t force you to.

why does he want a future with you?

takumi dislikes you, obviously. you couldn't care less about him, anyway. you hate him with the same passion.

he tried to knock sense on ren one time. it didn't go as he planned.

“i see your woman’s quite a catch.” takumi puffs his cigarette.

“of course.” ren replied.

“but she's quite like a closeted harlot.”

he's wrong. you never had anyone else after ren.

ren's ears tingled and his eyes darkened upon hearing what takumi said. “are you insulting her?”

“don’t get me wrong. the way i see it, she doesn’t seem emotionally involved with you. it seems to me that you’re the only one who is in your relationship, whatever you two are. if i know, i’d say she only wants sex and not love. you’re okay with that?” takumi chuckles.

ren raises his head. “so be it. i couldn’t care less.” if that’s what it takes to keep you around him.

“i’m just warning you, dude.” takumi raises both his hands in a defensive manner. “women like that, they're for the streets–”

ren, for once lost his calm demeanour and threw a glass at the nearest wall. the loud sound of the glass shattering startled everyone around them. even reira who was recording a demo of one of their tracks.

ren had his fists clenched after the burst of anger he let out and takumi was taken aback by the unexpected behavior of his usually composed bandmate.

“i don’t want to hear you talk about her ever again.” he coldly turned his back on his bandmate.

ren rarely gets mad. but when it's about you...

you don’t even get into fights often because ren stays out of drama and he avoids confrontations. which is why he's prone to keeping his emotions to himself instead of expressing them. he's very non-confrontational.

his desire to take your relationship to the next step was strong, but the desire to keep you around him was stronger. he knows he’ll drive you away if he mentions about tying the knot in a serious talk.

he likes using any products with your signature scent. it makes him feel like you’re there with him everywhere he goes.

“ren, you smell like white wine and strawberries, just like a girl!” was what reira told him upon stepping inside the room while sniffing him. “it leaves a scent trail. it smells familiar. what perfume are you using?”

ren turned to her, “it's [y/n]’s shower gel.”

“[y/n]? from black stones? woah, you stay at her place?” naoki stood up from his seat. ren entertained their questions for a little while.

it goes the same for you too in band practices too.

“is that ren’s perfume on you?” nobu speaks from behind you, smelling the familiar scent of his friend on you.

“no.”

“but…” nobu scans your figure. “oh. it’s because you’re wearing his shirt.”

you didn’t even smell how the shirt smelled like ren. it’s just your nostrils got so used to his scent that it didn’t even register to you how you didn’t smell like yourself.

“ren.”

“hm?”

and then you embrace him and suddenly, you’re reminded how strong your feelings are for ren honjo.

he stares at your face longer than he should in the morning when he wakes up first and you’re sleeping soundly next to him.

you’re beautiful. like you came straight out of a magazine.

if you were to be put beside supermodels, you’d outshine everyone. ren revels at the thought. if your face were to be featured in a magazine, he’ll frame it and keep it forever.

ren mutes all phone calls when he’s sleeping with you. but when he goes on tour, his mind is there back at home with you.

“i didn’t know booty calls worry what the other person eats. is that how people do it nowadays? so modernized, truly shocking.” came takumi’s remark while talking to reira and naoki out of ren's earshot.

“that’s so mean, takumi. leave him alone.” reira interjected, having flashbacks of when he offended ren when he was talking to him about you. her eyes were also on ren who's on the phone with you.

you'll always come back to him, he’ll always be waiting for you to go to his arms. you two are hopeless.

more time passed and you're finally decided to take a step forward, which ren was only waiting for you to initiate.

one snowy night while you and ren were sharing each other's heat, you hovered on top of him.

ren stops you. “wait,”

“do you not want to?” you were prepared to get off him in case he doesn't want to do it, but he held you in place.

“it’s not like that. it’s just…” he trailed, “i do want a family with you more than anything. but if you’re off the pill right now then…”

“so what?”

“i don’t want you to get pregnant if you don’t want to. what i say doesn’t matter. decide for yourself.”

“i want your child, inside me, ren.”

he was about to tell you to think it through again, but you put his hand on your hip.

“let's start a family.”

and once again, he can never deny you of anything.

after weeks, you didn't take the news well about hachi and that asshole, takumi.

“one of these days, i’ll snatch hachi back from you.” you told him.

“are you in love with my fiancèe even after everything, [y/n]? i pity ren for being ardent with his love for you. dump him if you can’t love him back like that. he doesn’t deserve your half-assed love.” takumi smirks, enjoying how riled up he makes you while relaying the news.

you thought you were just crazy when you gone through a deep state of grief after that conversation.

but you found out another cause were your hormones.

you're pregnant.

when you told ren you were pregnant, he reacted to the news calmly yet he was ecstatic. he's been waiting for this moment with you all along.

you chose not to tell ren about the conversation you had with takumi about hachi only a few days ago that put you in distress. you know he'd do something about it, and that'll cause more problems for him.

nothing much changed for the first few weeks, you continued on with your gigs while your belly wasn't showing yet and you can still move around normally.

ren stopped his substance abuse when he learned he'll be stepping into fatherhood.

yasu always keeps a close eye on you especially whenever ren is not around, even without ren's instructions. he's always there to aid you whenever you need something, which rarely ever happens because your pride doesn't let you ask for help from anyone. yasu still insists, anyway.

nobu speaks to your not-so-showing yet belly under your edgy peplum top and tells your kid to not grow like his or her mom, you, all gloom and grumpy. he earns a smack on his head in return. he's still in a state of grief after how his relationship with hachi ended up, but he's happy to be a soon-to-be-uncle to your child.

shin follows you everywhere like a puppy. he accompanies you to your walk to you and ren's shared unit and he stays over whenever he wants to. sometimes falling asleep comfortably on your lap while you watch light-hearted movies on the tv.

when you started showing, you took a break from the band for a few months but you didn't disclose your pregnancy to the media, announcing that it's only a hiatus.

when your belly started to get bigger, your clothes fit small to you, which is why to maximize their use, you let shin have his way with your closet. you had somehow similar versatile fashion styles, anyway. because of his small frame, almost everything in your wardrobe fits him. you told him to grab whatever he wants to borrow from your closet.

ren is there every step of the way. he buys you a lot of food. whatever you need, he'll go through hell to get.

he'd give his trapnest career up if ever he gets put in a situation where he has to choose.

when you gave birth, everyone visited. everyone... but hachi.

you try not to think about her anymore, but you still wonder about her whereabouts. you told ren and the others to stop talking about her in front of you when you were pregnant so it became a sensitive topic for everyone to talk about. and besides, you know another factor is also because takumi locks her away.

you only overheard from yasu that hachi gave birth to her child with takumi too, a few months before you gave birth to venus.

ren used to call you his venus.

your daughter’s name is venus.

venus honjo.

it's a pretty name the both of you agreed on giving such a pretty girl like your daughter.

you always opt to eat healthy while breastfeeding.

ren is a good father to venus.

she's more close to her father, that's why her first word was “dada”.

he gave your daughter everything the both of you never had.

and you protected your daughter from the things no one protected you from when you were younger.

you were extra gentle with her because you too, were a little girl once.

ren got deja vu when he was coddling venus and she snatched her arm from him.

“i kept praying she wouldn’t take after you. i guess her mama’s genes are stronger as expected.” ren laughed after what just happened. the engagement ring on his finger shining under the morning sunlight made you look at yours.

you ended up with him after everything.

and yet the words to describe your relationship with ren honjo are still nowhere to be found.

'she’s an angel.

a goddess,

my goddess.

like venus.

a beauty.'

***

© reesespeanutbutterfuck 2024, don't forget to support your creators by reblogging !

[bagely]

THIS HAS BEEN IN DRAFT FOR A WHILE AND THIS IS AN AU THAT NEVER FINISHED ((What a surprise )

I don't remember what much it really was, but the only fact that matters is that Missa is a famous singer and that Philza is unemployed or something like that idk.

Night had already fallen on the neighborhood when Missa gently opened the door to him home, trying not to make noise so as not to disturb him children's sleep. His older brother, Spreen, had offered him a ride home after his concert, a kind offer Missa gratefully accepted. 

“Thank you for bringing me home, Spreen,” Missa whispered as he crossed the threshold, careful not to make too much noise. 

Spreen gave him a warm smile. “It's nothing, I was just walking around anyway.” 

Missa took a step inside the house, but before closing the door, he turned back to him brothim. The cold night air was seeping through the opening, making him shiver. “It's cold... Are you coming inside? I'll make you some tea in thanks.” 

Spreen hesitated for a moment, worried about disturbing the sleeping children. “Are you sure? I don't want to wake your children with noise.” 

“They're like a rock, don't be sorry,” Missa reassured him with a smile. he playfully tapped him brother's shoulder, encouraging him to come inside. “Come in.” 

Spreen gave in to his younger brother's insistence and followed him inside the cozy house. However, as he passed through the living room on his way to the kitchen, an unpleasant scene caught his attention. Thime, lying on the sofa, lay Philza, Missa's husband, sound asleep. The table in front of him was adorned with two empty wine bottles and two glasses, one of which still contained traces of the reddish liquid. 

Missa stopped dead in him tracks, feeling a pang of guilt as he remembered that he had planned to return early from him concert to spend some quality time with him husband. The young jet-haired boy glanced sidelong at his older brother, whose expression reflected disapproval of Philza. 

Spreen didn't need to say anything; Missa could read his thoughts just by looking at his face. A tense silence hung over them, until finally Spreen broke the spell. 

“I remembered I have things to do,” he muttered, turning to leave. 

Missa followed him out the door, feeling helpless at the situation. “Oh... okay...” 

The door closed behind Spreen, and Missa returned to the living room taking the empty bottles to take them to the trash. 

A quick hand caught him wrist, he looked up to meet him husband's face, eyes wide. 

“I thought you were sleeping” Missa set the empty bottles on the table and sat next to Philza on the couch. him husband's eyes were glassy and his breath smelled of wine, but there was a vulnerability in his gaze that broke him heart. 

“How much did you drink?” asked Missa in a soft tone, not wanting to sound accusatory. he stroked Philza's arm in a comforting gesture. 

Philza wandered him eyes over the empty bottles, counting them with narrowed eyes. “One...two...I don't know,” he finally admitted with a nonchalant shrug. “You're late.” 

him husband's words stabbed like daggers into Missa's chest. “I'm sorry... I...” he began, him voice trembling. “I was asked to sing a few more songs and...” he searched desperately for an excuse, a way to atone for him fault, but the words stuck in him throat. “I forgot.” 

Philza looked at him with glazed eyes, but there was a sadness in them that went beyond simple drunkenness. “He hates me.” 

Missa frowned, confused. “Who, Spreen...no, he doesn't hate you...he just...” 

“He just thinks I'm holding you back with my children and keeping you from excelling as a singer,” Philza interrupted in a bitter tone.  “ I sometimes wonder if it's true.. if I should let you go.” 

“Hey, don't, don't.. act like that.” he brought him hands to him cheeks and caressed them tenderly “I love Chayanne and Tallulah...and you...nor Did he seek to change that, you're not ruining anything.” 

They melted into a tight embrace, Missa circling Philza's face with soft, tear-salted kisses. Their bodies trembled with contained weeping as they clung to each other, seeking comfort in the warmth of each other's arms.

They remained like that for an interminable time, until a dull thud startled them. Turning toward the source of the sound, they distinguished blond locks peeking out from behind a half-open door.

“Chayanne go to sleep.” Missa spoke. 

“fine...” Said him son's gossipy voice. “But.. why does dad have puffy eyes? and why are you kissing dad? And why aren't you asleep? And why...” 

“Chayanne” Missa repeated in a slightly louder tone. 

“Right.” he said letting out a chuckle.

[rinsuniverse]

oh my gosh, thank you so much for all of the sweet woozi content, my heart is so full from reading your works. 🥺🥺 do you think you could write something about woozi missing you while on tour? like he enjoys touring, but his days are so busy and exhausting, and all he wants to do at the end of the day is collapse into bed beside you, but he can't. and maybe a bit about what you could do to try to alleviate his homesickness? thank you again for all your lovely writings!!

woozi missing you on tour! ✧˖°.

this is so cute, anon!

i imagine he'd be in his hotel bed, late after his concert

you promised to stay up so you can call because he said he wanted to update you afterwards

but he's currently dozing off

and you're sitting there on facetime

his phone is leaning against the lamp on his bedside table

and you can see his face in his pillow, his messy hair splayed across his head, covering his eyes

"are you sleeping?"

"mm, no, are you?" he answers, not opening his closed eyes

"i don't know, it looks like you're falling asleep. if you want to sleep, you can-"

"no, it's fine," he says, turning to look at you in the camera

"how was your first concert of the tour?"

"fun, just super exhausting"

"and you have to leave for the next city tomorrow?"

"yes, early in the morning," he groans, closing his eyes again

"you should get some sleep then, silly," you chuckle

"i don't want to, though," he says

"why?"

he says it under his breath, as if he's embarrassed to admit it

"i miss you..."

you chuckle, setting your phone to the side so you can relax and close your eyes, too

"i miss you, too."

his ears become red, but you can't tell since his pillow covers it

it's his first tour since dating you

and it's a weird feeling to have in his chest

different from the homesick feel he has when it comes to when he's missing his parents

and it makes him feel particularly weak in a way

a part of him wants to get up, go to the gym, and workout this feeling of homesickness away

but he decides that letting himself miss you and laying in bed with you on call also laying in your bed is close enough

close enough to being able to lay next to you and listen to your soft breaths as you fall asleep

he finds it comforting

having your presence with him

"talk to me," he says, sleepily

"about what?"

"about your day. about anything."

he wants to hear your voice

he wants you to let him lay his head on your lap as you play with his hair

he wants to pull you into a hug and never let you go

maybe he'll have to call someone so he can beg for you to come on tour with him next time

because he can't take it

but you talk to him

you ramble about your day and he hums in response

or he chuckles when you get frustrated talking about a time at work that pissed you off

he falls asleep with you on call

when he wakes up the next day, super groggily, trying to waddle around the hotel room before he has to check out for his next busy day, he sees you're still on call with him

and he smiles

he even debates just leaving you on call until you wake up or his phone dies

but he doesn't

he hangs up and texts you a simple good morning text

when it comes to you, you want to alleviate his homesickness so much!

when you wake up, you text him a good morning text

maybe even a good morning paragraph, cheering him on

when you go about doing simple things throughout the day, you make sure to take pictures

and send them to him

whether it be a picture of your shopping cart in the grocery store you frequent

or a goofy picture of yourself that you took sneakily at work

and he'll respond with "pff why'd you send that?"

but when he sees those pictures, he smiles so brightly

the members might even ask him why he's smiling goofily at his phone as he's getting his makeup done

and he glares at them when they ask

plus, maybe you left him surprise letters or cards in his suitcase for him to read when he goes through his belongings

you do simple things, too

like leave your phone's ringer on

so you're always a phone call or text away

if you're evil mischievous, you'll send him pictures of you cooking his favorite food

or of you sneaking into his studio alone

and he'll be like "wtf why"

and you're teasing him like "i can share if you get home quickly"

makes him miss you even more

when he gets home, he might go straight back to work in his studio

but you're already there, of course

you know he isn't going straight home

so when he gets to his studio, he looks at you with wide eyes

"yah, what are you doing here?"

"welcome home."

you get up and you hug him

it takes him a moment to realize, but he hugs you back, tighter than he ever has

"i missed you," he says quietly

"i missed you, too"

thank you so much for requesting, anon!!! this was a really cute concept. AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR SUPPORT <3 you're so welcome for all my posts! i'm so sorry that i took forever to reply, but here it is! i hope it's satisfactory! feel free to request many, many more things! ✧( ु•⌄• )◞◟( •⌄• ू )✧

(p.s. requests are still open! i specialize in woozi stuff, but i don't mind writing about other svt members! i can also do some nsfw if you want! so request whatever and as much as you want! ς(>‿<.))

[okdeedee]

lay down your head

a very small din djarin x gn! reader sickfic . reader,,, works with mando? is hired by him? live-in employee. idk. the razor crest still exists. handwavey in terms of chronology.

__

an: because i have a shitty cold / fever / idk right now. so i daydream about how din djarin would take care of someone. me. us. whatever.

warnings: fluff. the mortifying ideal of being vulnerable with your colleagues/friends/crushes. no use of pronouns other than "you/your" and no y/n.

feat. trying to debunk the theory that being in the rain/being in somewhat cold weather will make you sick, one fic at a time. (hypothermia is real, catching a cold/the flu from being in the cold is not.)

wc: 1.3k words of 11pm feverish delirium.

__

It starts as a funny feeling behind your nose. As the day goes on, it spreads down to the back of your throat. Then there's the melancholy dawn of a dull headache and your joints start to hurt more than they usually do.

You're helping Mando carry a bounty back to the Crest at around three in the morning, Coruscant time, and suddenly it's ridiculously difficult.

The bounty is a fairly waiflike Twi'lek, so you're not sure why you're struggling. He could carry her on his own, sure, but you've watched him move enough that you can tell he's got back problems, so you try to help him carry heavy or awkwardly shaped things.

This Twi'lek in her hoop-skirted Opera-Concert-Goer finery definitely counts as the latter.

You watch him a lot.

The way he moves, how he interacts with his child, his prowess in combat. His proficiency with weapons gets you hot under the collar, sometimes.

But he's gruff and quite reserved, and you've taught yourself not to expect anything from this arrangement the two of you have. You haven't touched him before - not even to shake his hand.

When you trip over your own feet and the bounty goes lurching toward the floor, the Mandalorian pauses and glances at you with what you think might be annoyance.

But you can't see his face, obviously, and you sort of can't see full-stop in this dark alley, so it's anyone's guess.

By the time you get back to the Crest, your eyes burn with the effort of keeping them open. You don't want to be a liability, so you keep your head straight and you don't show any sign of weakness.

Once the bounty is frozen in carbonite, Mando climbs up the ladder, Grogu gurgling happily in his satchel. He doesn't seem to have noticed anything's really wrong with you, which is a relief. As soon as his boots disappear into the cockpit, you slump down to the floor.

Mando doesn't need a co-pilot - you're often down here during take-off anyway, tidying or putting your weapons away.

You value your alone time as much as he does, which is nice. He never pries when you need some time away from him and his little green kid.

You ache all over and you're shivering, but at least he can't see you. You're so tired that you fall asleep with your head resting against the weapon cupboard's door.

.

After he gets the Crest out of Coruscant's atmosphere and into hyperspace, Din lets Grogu play with a very small selection of the control panel that will not have drastic effects on the ship.

It takes a while, but the child's movements grow lethargic, and soon enough, he's asleep in Din's arms.

Din places him gently into his mobile cot so as to not wake him by taking him down the ladder, and realises he hasn't heard you move in over an hour.

Which is somewhat alarming - you take turns in the cot in the hull, and since Din can sleep in the pilot's chair, he figured you'd sleep there.

But he never heard the cot door depressurize and slam open, nor did he hear you pottering around like he usually does.

So he makes his way down the ladder, and he's bewildered by what he sees.

You're slumped on the ground, neck bent at an uncomfortable angle against the cupboard. You're breathing through your mouth a little raggedly, so fast you're almost panting, and there is a trickle of mucus coming out of your nose. Your hands twitch where they're draped across your torso, and your skin looks dull.

His heartrate skyrockets - he's a seasoned warrior and you're just his employee, so it probably shouldn't - and he moves over to you instantly.

Before he can think, he turns on the thermal view on his helmet, and sees that your head is hotter than the human head usually appears. So is your whole body.

He flicks it back to normal as he crouches next to you.

"Hey, wake up," he mutters.

He reaches out a hand to touch your shoulder, but he stops. He hasn't touched you before. Not intentionally. He wonders if you'd mind.

He thinks about it more and more each day.

Touching you.

Holding your hand, standing shoulder to shoulder, stroking your face.

Pressing your foreheads together in the way of his people, even if it's through his helmet.

But this is to make sure you're okay; it's different, so he reaches out and gently shakes you by one shoulder.

"Hey, you need to wake up," he murmurs.

You grunt, and your voice sounds like the rumble of footsteps over gravel.

"Can you open your eyes for me?"

Your eyelashes are a little crusted together, but you manage to open them. Your stare is vacant.

Din starts to panic.

"Did someone poison you? Did you eat something bad? Are you alright?"

You give him a sleepy chuckle, and your eyes close again, which is not helpful.

"Hey." He says with the sort of no-nonsense tone he uses with the child.

You blink. "What?"

"Did you get poisoned? Or spiked?"

"'M fine, Mando."

"You're not."

You huff, which sets you into a fit of coughing.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

You look at him with those bright, bloodshot eyes. You sniff and blink a few more times, blearily. It's silly, because he's really worried there's something wrong with you, but the open, sleepy expression on your face fills him with affection.

"Sweetheart, please."

You smile just barely. "Really, 'm fine. Just'a cold," you mumble.

"How would you have gotten a cold? The rain yesterday?" Din starts to spiral; he's supposed to protect you, whether he's ever expressed that to you or not, and now you're sick-

"Prob'ly that club a few days ago. Lots'a people. Confined space. No ventilation. Wonder why you didn't get sick."

"My helmet filters out most toxins and germs." He says.

You reach out and fiddle with the edge of one of the pouches strapped around his calf. "Lucky boy," you say, grinning dazedly.

You look incredibly unwell, but you're touching him, joking around with him. His heart pounds.

Then you groan and put your hand to your head, and he's whirled into action again.

.

The next half hour is hard to remember in full detail. You're so tired.

These are the glimpses you're conscious enough for:

Mando lifts you up, even with his bad back, and sits you up properly. He gets painkillers from the 'fresher, which you try to refuse, but he practically force-feeds them to you. He gives you his water canteen and tells you to take twenty sips of it.

He holds a cloth to your nose and tells you to blow your nose into his hand, which is mortifying, but you're too dazed to do otherwise.

He uses a cold, damp cloth to wipe your face and neck down, which makes your skin erupt in goosebumps.

"Too cold," you grumble.

"Almost done, baby."

The heat that rushes through you at the sound of his gruff, modulated voice calling you 'baby' almost cures your chills for a second.

"Can I hold you?" the Mandalorian asks softly.

If you were awake, you'd freak out about this ridiculously attractive and emotionally distant man making an offer like that, but being held just sounds nice right now, so you whisper, "Yeah."

Next thing you know, the battle-hardened, ruthless Mandalorian bounty hunter is sitting behind you, one arm around your torso, the other stroking your forehead.

You're in between his legs, your back against his chest.

This is not how you thought your recovery from illness would go.

You find you don't have any reason to complain.

His armour's a little cold, and it shocks you at first, but once your feverish body heat warms it up, it's soothing. He smells good - beskar doesn't have that tangy scent so many metals have; it's cleaner, earthier. He smells warm, inviting, human.

You like this Mandalorian. Quite a lot, as Mandalorians go. And just as a person in general.

He chuckles; a deep, comforting rumble that you feel in your back ribcage before you hear it.

"What're you laughin' at?" you mumble, burrowing the side of your head into his chest

Another shorter, breathy chuckle. "What you just said."

Oops. "Didn't mean t' say that. Out loud, I mean."

"I'll forget I heard it."

"No you won't. You remember everything."

The chin of his helmet rests gently against the crown of your head, and he takes a deep breath in.

"Sleep, cyare. I've got you."

[reallychaoticwoo]

I was the one who requested a reader biases yeosang. Can it be a different one than the one posted . Maybe like reader gets period cramps and such and yoesang finger/fucks her after concert seeing her in pain at send off

Hopefully, this is close to what you were looking for 🖤 I'm still working on writing smut a bit better, but I do hope you can enjoy it anyway🖤

❤️Pairing: Idol Yeosang x atiny y/n

⚠️Warnings: MDNI!! 18+ ONLY! Smut, fingering, bad period cramps, please let me know if I forgot anything!

✨️This is purely fictional and does not represent Yeosang in any way. It's is solely for entertainment purposes.

Concert day had finally arrived! You'd been looking forward to it for months and of course you just had to wake up with the worse cramps. Deciding you were absolutely not going to let them ruin your day you got yourself ready. You set out your outfit last night, a denim mini skirt and a cropped green sweater. You paired the look with a diamond waist chain that had diamonds coming down from the main chain, and some cute chunky heeled boots you'd bought just for this outfit. You did your hair in low space buns and some simple natural makeup before grabbing your purse a yeosang pc and plush keychain hanging from it and heading out the door.

Walking into sound check, your cramps were coming for you with vengeance. You leaned in on yourself trying to make it through the wave of pain. Yeosang who happened to be closest to you on the stage at the time noticed you looking uncomfortable and shot you a worried look. You quickly straightened yourself smiling at him before he returned to the group finishing up their last song. As the boys disappeared back stage you took a moment to regroup yourself taking a sip on water and taking some pain relief pills you threw in your purse this morning.

The concert went so much better than you could have ever imagined. You jumped, danced, sang, screamed, and even cried. Yeosang had glaced at you several times throughout the concert, making sure you were okay. You had caught one or two of those glances, but you just assumed it was him being great with his fans. What you didn't expect was that he was concerned for you, his atiny.

You'd made it to send off. You were anything hut ready for this night to be over. Sadly your cramps were back and you were trying your best not to let it show. Unbeknownst to you, it was pretty visible how much pain you were in. Your face had paled, your eyebrows scrunched. Yeosang had made his way to your section and you tried your best to perk back up. "You were absolutely amazing tonight!" You told him a big smile on your face but it didn't quite reach your eyes. He smiled politely thanking you and leaned to his manager whispering something in his ear. As he moved a bit further down the line his manger handed you a photocard. Puzzled you looked at it and read the contents. 'Please stay after send off is finished. I'd like to talk to you'. You were confused but you were absolutely NOT going to refuse such an offer.

Sendoff had finished and you were the last of the fans standing in the empty hall. Checking your phone you heard a voice come up beside you. "Hey, I just wanted to check on you. You looked really uncomfortable at soundcheck and send off." You turned to the voice. Your eyes widened at your bias who was standing right in front of you. You tried to remain somewhat normal, internally screaming at the fact your bias kept you behind to make sure you were okay. "I - I -I'm okay. Thank you." You said mentally slapping yourself for stuttering infront of him. "Are you sure? Your eyebrows have been scrunched all night. And I saw you almost hugging yourself. That doesn't seem like someone who's okay." He looked at you with a quirked brow but concern still written all over his face. "Its fine, really. It's just cramps, nothing I haven't dealt with before." You tried brushing off the pain that was only hitting you harder right now. Your body tensed as you tried to stay level and seem like everything was fine. "Well I'm more than happy to help, you know, with the pain." He said somewhat shyly. You looked at him confused. Before you could reply he added, "Just come with me okay. Let me help." And of course, you followed him.

You followed him all the way back to his hotel room. Your mind was swimming with questions that would soon be answered. Your heartbeat quickened at the sheer fact you were now with Yeosang in his hotel room. He brought you over to his bed sitting down on it, gently patting the space next to him for you to sit. "I hope you don't mind but I didn't feel comfortable going into detail at the venue even if we were alone in the hall." He started, "I was trying to say I could help alleviate your cramps if you wanted and were comfortable with that. I can't let one of my own atiny stay in pain all night." You looked at him with your head cocked to the side. "I'm, uhm, I'm not quite sure I understand." You said thinking there was absolutely no way he was talking about the two of you getting physically intimate. "What I'm saying is, if you're comfortable, I'd like to help make you cum. I know orgasms can help relieve cramping. Mind if I give you a few?" He asked you leaning closer with a shy but confident look in his eyes. You nodded your nerves to high to try and make words right now. "I'm going to need verbal confirmation beautiful." He said placing his hand gently above your knee. You gulped. Your body was tingling at his touch. "Y-yes. Pl-please." Your voice shaking as you gave him your consent.

"Wonderful, now just try and relax for me okay?" He said moving to place a soft kiss to your lips, his hand moving slightly further up your thigh giving it a gentle squeeze. Your body immediately melting at his touch. You did not think Yeosang would be this forward. What kind of fan service was this? Not that you're complaining. How could you complain when he chose to help you in the most intimate way possible.

His kisses grew more passionate and his hand massaged your thigh. Slowly he pulled your thigh onto his lap. Your legs now spread open for him. Kissing down your jaw, then to the dip of your neck and back up, he moved his free hand up your thigh to where your very wet core sat. Rubbing a finger across the lace, he hummed to himself appreciatively. You let out a soft moan at the sudden friction jolting in place. He smiled at how responsive you were while pulling your panties to the side to run his index finger through your folds. Earning another soft moan, he gently dipped his finger in your hole. His cock hardeneding against his pants at the thought of feeling your tight cunt around him later.

Rubbing his thumb against your clit he leaned you back against the bed slowly. His free hand on the top of your back helping you ease against the sheets. He slips a second finger inside, his pace starting to pick up. Your arms wrap around his neck pulling his in for another kiss. Your pain long forgotten in the dream that you are currently living. He kisses you with such soft passion, pouring his care and concern for your wellbeing into each movement of his lips and tongue. Moaning into him you start to feel the coil of pleasure tighten in your stomach begging to snap. Feeling you start to clench around his fingers he picks up his pace adding a third finger into your sweet sopping cunt. His fingers are hitting all the right spots, coaxing you closer and closer. As soon as he applies a bit more pressure to your clip with his thumb you're gripping the sheets with your free hand, your other hand clawing into his forearm. "Just relax my beautiful tiny, let go. Let me feel you come undone on my fingers." He whispered in your ear, sending a tingle down your spine before your coil snapped. Your vision blurred, your body teasing, your full cunt constricting his fingers in waves. You fell limp trying to catch your breathe, a drunk smile on your face, eyes barely open. "You did wonderfully, how are you feeling?" Yeosang asked propping himself up next to you. "Much better, thank you" You replied still trying to steady your breathing. "If you'd like, I'd love to make you cum again." He placed a soft kiss to your forehead, his hand rubbing on your lower stomach. "I'm not stupid enough to turn down such an enticing offer."

[666writingcafe]

Barbatos' Birthday Surprise (Part Five)

"Barbatos?" I poke my head out of the hotel suite's bedroom and find that he's starting to unpack his belongings in the living room area. "What are you doing?"

"I figured you would have the bed," he explains, merely glancing up at me. "I'm fine sleeping on the couch."

"Barbatos."

"Yes?"

"You can't get a good night's sleep on a couch."

"It would be improper to have you sleep here." I can't help but roll my eyes at him. He still is in butler mode, even though he's supposed to be on vacation and, more importantly, relax.

"You know, we don't have to sleep separately." Thankfully, that makes Barbatos stop moving around and focus his attention on me.

"I..." He clears his throat and swallows, and I wonder if I've made him nervous. "Are you sure, MC?" I sigh.

"If I didn't feel comfortable with the idea of the two of us sharing a bed together, I wouldn't have suggested it in the first place."

"You're right." He sets the stack of clothes he's holding down on the couch, walks up to me, and gently grasps my hand. "You'll have to forgive me, MC. This sort of relationship is...new to me. I don't want to overstep any boundaries." I can tell he's being earnest. It's quite sweet. And adorable.

"Don't worry." I squeeze his hand and smile softly at him, trying to reassure him. "I'll let you know if you misstep." I lean in and gently kiss him on the cheek; pulling back reveals a slightly blushing Barbatos.

"Give me a few moments to reorganize, and I'll meet you back there," he replies, his voice softer than usual.

~~~

August 23

Unsurprisingly, by the time I wake up, Barbatos has long vacated the bed. He usually ends up waking up at the crack of dawn to begin his duties for the day, so it's not like I expected him to suddenly be able to sleep in while he's on vacation.

What is peculiar, however, is the fact that he's not in the suite's kitchen, but instead appears to be in the bathroom.

The one time he got tickets, he ended up with a horrible stomach flu that knocked him out for the entire week of the concert.

Oh no. Did he end up sick again?

Trying to keep my nerves at bay, I walk up to the bathroom door and gently knock.

"Barbatos, are you okay?" I ask. The sound of things clanking answers me. What exactly is he doing in there that would make that much noise? From what I heard, he normally doesn't take that long to get dressed.

"Yes," he responds back. "I'll be out shortly. I didn't anticipate taking so long in here, but I'm almost done." Part of me still feels uneasy as I head over to the living room area and sit on the couch. While he didn't sound sick, the fact that he mentioned taking longer in there than he expected...what is going on?

My question soon gets answered when the bathroom door opens and Barbatos steps out. To put it simply, he doesn't look like the butler that I've come to know. His hair flows down past his chest, his bare arms are covered with tattoos, his short-sleeved shirt accentuates his muscles, and his black jeans are actually ripped.

He looks...well, hot. Until this moment, I never fully understood why Asmo was so obsessed with Barbatos, but if the Avatar of Lust has seen him like this, then it all makes sense. Not that Barbatos is bad-looking by any means when he's in his usual attire, but this brings his appearance to a whole other level.

Which makes me incredibly nervous.

"MC?" Barbatos is suddenly kneeling in front of me, his hands grabbing my own. "What's wrong?"

"You look great," I answer, my voice a bit croaky. Quickly realizing how wrong that sounded, I add,

"Not that that's a bad thing, of course. It's just that...well..." I can't finish my sentence. Incomplete thoughts are racing around in my head, and I can't put any of them together to say anything coherent. Barbatos leans in and places a hand on the side of my face, as if sensing what I'm worrying about.

"I like you exactly as you are, MC. You have a very beautiful soul, and I find that attractive."

"Because you're a demon."

"Well, yes, but I've found that all beings are drawn to souls like yours, not just inhabitants of the Devildom." He rests his forehead on mine, making my heart begin to beat faster. "I am beyond grateful that I get to do this with you, MC. This experience wouldn't be the same without you." He kisses me gently before leaning away and standing back up.

"However, if you are worried about what people might say when they see us together, then I can help you get ready. That is, if it would help you feel better about your overall appearance. I personally think you would look fine in whatever you wanted to wear, but I know that me saying that may not help quiet the voice inside your head."