#hilson fic

[microwavedmetal]

I felt the need to do a list of all the hilson fics that I remember have this trope or something that goes near it. I've also taken the liberty to add stories that even barely brushes the concept.

When House is Bored

gracefultree

Summary:

When House gets bored, he asks uncomfortable questions that he doesn't expect Wilson to answer... only this time, he answers and House has to deal with the consequences.

Comment: This one comes closest to fulfilling the actual prompt imo

**********************************************************

How Not To Be Boring

By: fourleggedfish

House is bored, and Wilson is tired of being labeled the boring half of the friendship...so he calls House on a dare. And then stuff ensues. House/Wilson, EXPLICIT SLASH/NC-17! Now rendered AU; pretty much disregards everything starting with "Softer Side"

Comment: Also fits the criteria, but it's technically it's Wilson that started it all

****************************************************************

The Kissing Experiment

starryvioletnight

Summary:

Wilson gets a kiss one day from none other than Gregory House. And then he gets another, and another. Why is House kissing him once a day? Wilson doesn't know, but surely it's completely platonic.

Just a lot of fluff. I wanted to write them kissing.

Comment: This one is more about actions than joking words. 'I'm kissing you, and if you take offense I'm pulling a 'no homo' '.

********************************************************

Contamination

Someone overhears House's "confession" to Stacy in "The Mistake", and the rumors get a little out of hand.

Comment: Stories diverges from the initial prompt from now on. House jokes about being with Wilson. Everyone believes he was being serious. It changes stuff.

************************************************************

It’s Not Gay If It’s a Prank

cashewmilkhotel

Summary:

House “pranks” Wilson by stealing all of his clothes and leaving him with only a skimpy maid outfit, Wilson tries to fight back.

Set in the beginning of the series when Wilson gets divorced and House lets him sleep on his couch but not without a bombardment of pranks.

Comment: House really played himself with that one. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

**************************************************************

Flirt Alert

QueerSolar

Summary:

Wilson cannot recognize when someone is flirting with him, even if he swears he can. House decides to teach Wilson what flirting looks like, by flirting with the man, like the countless nurses would. How could his plan backfire?

Comment: House platonically flirts with Wilson to prove a point? Yeah, right.

[repressionmd]

a selection of housefics i love!

i will make a part 2 when i reach character limit :D currently there is just 11 fics here but i WILL be updating!

Playtime's Over or The One Where Cuddy Forces House to See a Child Psychologist - mskullgirl

author summary: Following the events of "Skin Deep" (season 2, episode 13) House spirals out of control and stops eating and sleeping. Cuddy eventually offers him a deal; five sessions with Dr. Addams, the hospital's resident child psychologist, in exchange for three months off of clinic duty. What could go wrong? word count: 48k my notes: SO GOOD!! such a fun analysis of house and it has potentially my favourite accidental child acquisition of all time

Everything He Wants - the_northwind

author summary: House discovers that Wilson is a better coping mechanism than Vicodin. There's no way this could go wrong. A rewrite of the season six finale and beyond where instead of Cuddy, Wilson goes to House's apartment after the crane collapse. word count: 11k my notes: has one of my favourite hilson fic argument scenes. they're dysfunctional and messy and SO in character i couldn't recommend enough

Hypothesis - IreneSpring

author summary: At the beginning of the month, James Wilson decides to break out of his depressive spiral by having an affair with the first woman who is not needy. By the end of the month, he is facing an existential crisis decades in the making. word count: 15k my notes: haha wilson you are gay (jokes aside this fic is actually so fun and silly and made me LAUGH at the hoops our wilson jumps through to eventually realise he didn't get anywhere anyway)

Under My Skin - rhythmofsnow

author summary: Thirteen has a meltdown. House is there to ground her through it. (Post 5x05 "Lucky Thirteen") word count: 1.4k my notes: caring house my beloved... autistic solidarity my even more beloved <3

Composed - ferretwhomst

author summary: compose verb /kəmˈpəʊz/ 1. calm or settle (oneself or one's features or thoughts). 2. write or create (a work of art, especially music or poetry). or: a sick, restless Wilson finds himself in need of House’s company late at night. House indulges him. word count: 2.2k my notes: SO BEAUTIFUL.... wilson is so gay and so melodramatic and house matches his freak so well and WRITES HIM A PIANO PIECE....... they're so soft with each other idk its just beautiful. please read this

Soothe me now, soothe me, old friend (eng) - culturenana

author summary: Wilson would love to – Wilson would like to do so many things, make the most of countless wasted opportunities, erase every mistake, since his time has shortened without any warning, cruelly consuming itself under every cough. / House holds him close as if he is about to slip from his arms, and neither of them has the courage to discern what this thing between them is. There is no excuse or rational diagnosis that could cover it up. word count: 7.2k my notes: oh my god this fic made me want to bawl its so beautifully written and i have been shying away from post-finale fics purely to save myself the heartbreak but im SO glad i didn't do that with this one. they mean everything to me ;-;

'Samson's Mistress Cut His Hair, Thus Removing His Strength' - Sparklesinthewater

author summary: Set in season 3. Stacy doesn't come back. Tritter doesn't interfere. But the drugs and the infarction keep getting House into trouble anyway. Wilson is trying his best (but his best may not be what's best for House). / Or, House gets himself a girlfriend. Life goes downhill from there. word count: a beautiful 129k my notes: hello? hello!!!! can anyone hear me!! fic of all time!!!! a novel in its own right, and i did in fact stay up till 3.30am finishing it. impossible to put down and did make me want to cry in places. absolutely stunning. would recommend to everyone

a thousand teeth (and yours among them) - itooaminthisepisode (anarchy_opossum)

author summary: Sometimes, when House gets too overwhelmed by his emotions, he gets a little bitey. This is five times House bites Wilson, and one time Wilson finally bites him back. word count: 10k my notes: GORGEOUS STUFF!! amazing characterisation with lovely internal voices <3 they're so them and it makes me so happy

i let you win, i love to lose - sesamie

author summary: a short thing inspired by the thought, "what if amber and wilson's sex tape was ***for house***?" it seems like exactly the kind of toxic manipulative thing amber would pull and bring wilson along for. so here it is! set after the finale of season 4, and wilson and house haven't spoken about everything yet. things are bad between them and that's where the angst in this comes from! word count: 4.6k my notes: this fic did irreparable things to my psyche i mean ACTUALLY i do find myself thinking about it as im going about my day. genuinely was blown away by the sheer power of the prose i'll be honest 😭

we peeled the freckles from our shoulders - flowersinapril

author summary: Greg is twenty-three and James is nineteen when they first meet as counsellors at a sleepaway camp in the Adirondacks. word count: 2.1k my notes: GOD THIS WAS SO BEAUTIFUL... AAAHHHHHH i dont even have any words. please read this. crops watered joy delivered will to live restored etc. oh my god.

I'd Make a Deal With God (I'd Get Him to Swap Our Places) - TheFandomLesbian

author summary: When Wilson receives his terminal diagnosis, House flees to the hospital chapel. He doesn't know how to pray, but he strikes a deal: his soul for Wilson's life. When Wilson goes into remission, he has no choice but to uphold his end of the bargain. / In which House learns nothing about God, but everything about worship, in the arms of his husband. word count: 11.3k my notes: HOLY FUCK.. obsessed and i mean Obsessed with love as religious Especially when it comes to gregory 'religion is meaningless' house like this was so... good. it was so good. house is so desperate and so in love and its the most delicious thing ever

[thatwholethingwiththeduck]

hilson fic tropes, an incomplete list

already married, have been for years

wilson massages house's leg

hospital betting pool

gay chicken

fake dating

drunk hookup

post-series hookup

wilson lives

they die together

ducklings as matchmakers

caught masturbating

"leave a tender moment alone"

morning wood leads to things

fake proposal as real proposal

use of ducklings + white board to do DDX for Being In Love With Wilson

male hookers + jealousy

drugging one another

thirteen uses her bi-dar to point out their love

new orleans hookup

road trip

(i love them all)

[oriley42]

The face that launched 24k words of fanfic...

Read Weekend in the Poconos on AO3!

[kurtdotkelly]

look i dont usually like fanfics but i need a hilson fanfic where wilson accidentally gets spiked with molly, house comes in the next day and somebody on his team is like 'house you got a patient' and they like redact the name or take it off and just house doesnt care he comes in realizes its wilson and because wilson 100% doesnt do drugs hes fucked as shit and mmolly makes him really affectionate with house and hes like 'goddamn wtf isnt this shit supposed to wear off' and his team is like 'yeah so turns out hes fucked up and it wont come out of his system anturally so go fix him' if anybody does this you gyatta tell me PLEAASEE [or else ill do it /sillythreat]

[luce-ing]

house/wilson fics

criteria - 2.4k - “I don’t think they know that we’re married.”

The Private Life of Gregory House - 4.1k - "You guys really don't get it, do you?" "Get what?" "It's almost insulting, really." Or, five times the team missed the point completely, and one time where they figured it out

Bending You(r logic) - 4.2k - Assflash, newshole, we were married the whole goddamn time.

Synchronicity - 10.3k - Dead patients, car wrecks, drug overdoses, journalists, Comatose Charlie, and orange chicken. Must be love.

The Oncologist Trap - 13k - House subtly seduces Wilson. Somehow.

He Won't Tell You That He Loves You - 25k - “Finish it out,” he grits between clenched teeth. “Go on. Ask it.” Nolan shifts in his seat. “Are or are you not attracted, at the very least, to Wilson?” House knocks his forehead against his cane. “I don’t know. Maybe.” [In which Nolan pulls at the Wilson thread, and House can't stop it all from unraveling. Repression is a hell of a drug.]

The Line of Thought - 12.6k - Cameron, Foreman, and Chase keep on trying to get into the little details of House's love life. House doesn't like that one bit.

Son of Mine - 13.5k - Wilson shrugged. “Well, you’ve met him,” he pointed out. “What do you think House’s kid would be like, if House had a kid?”

[stuffnthangsss]

Currently reading a hilson fic where house never became a doctor (got kicked out of med school I think) and instead went on to work at a jazz club—where he has a meet cute with Wilson (still an oncologist)—which just reminds me of La La Land. Especially the end montage where Seb and Mia get together in one world but in the world of the movie, Mia moves on and gets married (screams Wilson, don’t it?). ALSO the fact that house canonically likes jazz whereas wilson prefers the blues iirc.

Imagine if I were to draw a hilson la la land au, haha jk, unless?

Edit: found this pic and tumblr and it’s perfect

[compsonn]

Most Well-Written Fics 2024

back at it again for the third year in a row!! personal favorites from this year across multiple fandoms!

no particular order, just based on the order of my bookmarks.

for reference i am sooo picky, i have read over 6000 fics according to ao3, and i've read 700 since the beginning of the year. i only have 53 bookmarks in total... but here are some bookmarked fics i read this year!!!

this year i got into some random shit, blah blah blah, honestly most of these are not faulkner levels of literature doing monuments for the english language but they were good and make me feel a sort of way, so, here you go

Harry Potter (Drarry)

This Year's Love by trishjames / drarry E, longfic. love it a lot. genuinely made me want to become an adult. they were meant to be cry emoji

Yes, But It'lll Cost You by mintaminta / drarry T, privated. this one had such a good vibe, reminds me of fun and school and calm darkness. very nice.

Bad Habits by No_One_Special_01289 / drarry E, lowkey porn, longfic. those last few chapters got me SO hard, they love each other omg cry emoji. poor harry. i think i skipped most of the smut when i read it but the plot was so good. literally star crossed lovers UGHHHHH LET THEM BE TOGETHER

Recursion by tessacrowley / drarry E, longfic. its written really well and it's witty, but i kind of think this author just self-inserts herself for draco in all her fics because... that boy was soo pathetic in canon. genius au basically. but i can forgive her bc the fics are good

House M.D. (Hilson)

yes Medical Malpractice Husbands whatever shut up i like the fics and they're probably in love so leave me BE. these fics are good.

Look, Don't Touch by ORiley42 / hilson E, voyeurism fic.... guys HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUT OK that makes it sound SOOO bad but trust me i bookmarked this one because the author took such a horrible trope and made it genuinely not feel that creepy. like this fic is SO funny. it's really good. and the author is straight up just a good writer

the sea and the sky and you and i by thismagichour / hilson M, hanahaki angst. its really good because wilson just gives up and its soo heart wrenching bc he thinks house doesnt like him back and just wants to die. poor guy.

My Hero Academia (Dabihawks)

i have not given a Phuque about MHA for the past five years but i had this phase this year where i was briefly re-obsessed with dabihawks so here are some fics

planting trees (making shade) by nightquake / dabihawks T. basically hawks KHS for a good cause ..? really well written, has high tension and good allusions. loved this one. its the kind of fic u know is good by the summary

Hawks Lays an Egg by ButterflyApocalypse / dabihawks T. never in my entire Life 18 Years have i ever enjoyed mpreg except this fic, because he isnt even pregnant he just has this egg. it's such a good funny fic. i was asking myself why i had it bookmarked from like four years ago earlier this year so i reread it and i was like Yeah ok it deserves the bookmark. SOOO funny and ridiculous. crackiest fic.

MISC random fandoms (Battle Cats (????) and A Clockwork Orange)

nyankopalooza by Sanodigy / Battle Cats Game gen. No clue how i even found this. its so funny. ive never read a fic like this. its so funny. and weirdly well written, i like experimental / weirdly formatted fics. i used to play this game when i was a kid

Bitva Gruppa by VoidVesper / a clockwork orange X fight club, alex delarge X tyler durden E. its straight up a horrible plot, AKA CHILD GETS ASSAULTED. warning for underage and assault. it's not a morally good fic (clockwork orange is intentionally a morally wrong book). but holy shit the writing is great. like it reads like it's anthony burgess. just really good. probably one of the only fics here where i straight up bookmarked only because of the writing style

OK that wraps up this year's edition!! please give these fics a read, your life will be Fulfilled. byebyee

[hilsonamore]

GUYS GUYS QUICK- 10k-20k WORD HILSON FIC WITH AN INTENSE AND HEART-WRENCHING AND SWEET AND YUM PLOT I DONT CARE WHAT EXACTLY I JUST WANT TO FEEL ALL THE FEELS AND CRY AND SOB AND FEEL WEIRD IN MY STOMACH (pref with a happy ending i don’t want to kms)

[microwavedmetal]

Gay chicken Hilson

@deanbane bc i promised you a rec list

I separated the fics by subtropes for convenience sake

Its not a comprehensive list, only the stories I've read and remembered I liked.

Standard Gay chicken

Experimental Procedures

ORiley42

Summary: An offhand comment leads Wilson to test out some unusual methods of pain relief for House. (They’re extremely effective.)  <https://archiveofourown.org/works/49530220>

Double or nothing.

EnochianLullabies

Summary: House kisses Wilson's check as part of an 'act', it feels too natural to him, so, of course, he has to turn it all into a game, Wilson catches up pretty quickly. The ducklings try to not get scarred for life.  <https://archiveofourown.org/works/27762535/chapters/67959766>

Autopilot

tornyourdress

Summary: Wilson is used to kissing his wives goodbye before he leaves for work in the morning. When he accidentally kisses House, he knows he's not going to be allowed forget it.  <https://archiveofourown.org/works/55483522>

One-sided Gay chicken (?)

The Game of Misunderstandings

cupqueencake

Summary: Test the waters, Cuddy had told him. She’s the only one that really knows, after all. You don’t flirt with her daily for her not to realize it’s been a deflection from who he really loves. He’s sure by test, Cuddy meant something normal. To just ask him out, give him roses or something, make him dinner. But House is far from normal, and he’s buzzing in his skin with how bored he is. Recipe for disaster, more like. Or, the time Gregory House tried to win a convoluted game just to get together with his longtime friend James Wilson. He just didn't realize he had already lost before agreeing to play.  <https://archiveofourown.org/works/54336595>

Fake marriage

either love is a shrine (or else, a scar)

jamesevanwilson (suhossineun)

Summary: House has a brilliant plan, and he needs Wilson's help. Wilson is a chronic enabler. Getting married for the fourth time should be relatively easy.  <https://archiveofourown.org/works/51980650/chapters/131446576>

I Never Sleep With Married Men

WaitingToBeBroken

Summary: House and Wilson are married. It's not what you think.  <https://archiveofourown.org/works/51500782/chapters/130157821>

[scroogemcducksbastardchild]

does anyone have any gutwrenching hilson fic recs. i need my daily dose of old man yaoi

[repressionmd]

snippet from my latest fic!! i'll wait for your love is up on ao3 for some domestic fluff goodness <3

[thatwholethingwiththeduck]

In the year of our lord 2024 I wrote a lot of fanfiction about these stupid medical malpractice guys.

It seemed easier to note the ones that weren't Hilson.

post-series

He Wants

Dying Men 

Suspicious

Favor 

Cocktails 

The Sixth Stage

pleased to meet you, hope you guess my name

eternal themes 

One More Story

Happy [stacy/cuddy]

The Open Road

Declarations 

season 8

the drinks always have subtext

depends on how much you have to drink

season 7

Ten Days

He'd Know 

(He'd want to be left alone) [gen]

between pain and not 

season 6

absolution

Wonder

Manly Heterosexual Beers

Third Wheel

Regular Friendship

Couch Politics

star anise with caramelized onions

cures for insomnia 

Set The Date 

Rings

the secret sits in the middle and knows 

your slightest look easily will unclose me

we dance around in a ring

I'm Your Man

season 5

Personality Flaw 

Someone Always Cries [cameron/wilson with background hilson pining]

Not Friends

season 4

James Wilson and the Cozy Blanket of Denial

season 3

Questions and Answers 

True Hate's Kiss 

a light breeze

season 2

In The Human World

Autopilot

Hypotheticals 

Don't Cry 

season 1

Spaghetti 

vague timeline

Kinder

Hiring Practices 

5 Feelings 

the thing is 

Drinking Game

Distraction [houseteen]

Data

Fourth Time’s The Charm 

Pain Relief [houseteen]

Souvenirs You Never Lose 

Sensitivity Training 

Diagnosis

what we talk about when we talk about big pharma 

The Replacement 

Guys' Night Out

whumptober 2024 [mostly hilson]

Monday Morning

Open Bar 

miniatures [drabbles]

pre-series

you love him more 

Wedding Bells 

Before [gen]

Feminist Sisterhood Something Something [stacy/cuddy]

au

two roads diverged in new orleans and i (i took the road less traveled by) 

crossovers

Flamingos (Boston Legal)

Divorced Men's Club (Friends)

Napa (Mom)

Second Wives Club (Frasier)

assume it will be brilliant (Grey's Anatomy)

Love is itself unmoving (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine)

my own beginning, my own ending (Star Trek)

[oriley42]

Chapters: 1/4 Fandom: House M.D. Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Gregory House/James Wilson Characters: James Wilson (House M.D.), Gregory House, brief cameos by Cuddy and a blend of fellows Additional Tags: Animal Play, Pet Play, Puppy Play, BDSM, Kink Negotiation, not exactly safe or sane but consensual freakery, Unsafe Sex, Silly Sex, Dirty Talk, Sex Toys, Slapping, Spanking, Choking, Smut, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Fluff, Humor, Light Angst, sub-drop and depersonalization, Aftercare, Bathing/Washing, Massage, listen House needs to be leashed and told he's Wilson's bad puppy, It's for his own good Summary:

House learns how to be Wilson’s puppy. (Yes, it’s a sex thing.)

[kurtdotkelly]

I had the most vivid dream that I was Wilson [I would switch from a 3rd/1st Person POV in every 'scene'], and that I got to work with House. And I held his hand AND IT FELT FUCKING GREAT. We were at the office for some reason? Like, office job with a computer. AND I JUST GOT TO HOLD HIS HAND. WILSON GOT TO HOLD HIS HAND!!! And he was indifferent and he was so House. His charisma is so crazy though.

[supermutticon]

Erm follow me on TT @supermutticon

I sometimes edit