#highschool sweethearts

[blankandscribble]

There something so highschool about Gwen and Miles' relationship, and I don't mean that in a negative way. The intensity of first real love, when you're old enough to know what it is but not old enough to know what you're doing. The messing up, the fumbling, the pining, the ugly mistakes. The purity and sweetness, the honesty, where you feel there is no one else in the universe quite like this (and you're young, you haven't seen much of the universe, but that doesn't make it a lie). The kind of love that comes with impossible odds, because how many people do or should marry their first love? You're doomed by statistics, by the stretch of growing and straining out of youth. But you believe it will be you, you believe you are the ones who will make it work. Despite everything. Because after all, there's a first time for everything, right?

[epiph-annie]

bittersweet sixteen suddenly

[shutit-haha]

Rocker Bakugo/Manager reader

Rocker Bakugo who everyone labels as cocky but you simply say arrogant. There's videos that have gone viral of you correcting people during interviews saying he's only like this because he knows what he can do. This is how you gain your popularity as his manager.

"Now you're quite cocky aren't you?" The grey haired man leans forward onto his desk.

"No, he's not." You speak up from where you sit next to Bakugo on the dark green sofa.

"But he is," the man corrects you.

"No, he's not." You've taken on a more stern tone, "anytime Katsuki has ever told me 'I don't need you to teach me' he goes and proves that in fact he doesn't need my assistance. He's very talented and has been since a surprisingly young age, do I wish he was nicer yes, every one does. He's arrogant only because he's aware of how talented he is." The interview was cut short after that, security escorting your crew out. This is how you accidently make your mark.

Rocker Bakugo who has a ton of groupies but doesn't really care. As his career starts to rocket, he appears more and more in public with hickeys on his shoulders and chest. At first there's speculation of it being from wild fan, however it's all from you. Gotta make your claim on your drummer boy.

Rocker Bakugo who sits you on his lap and tries to teach you how to play the drums. He wraps his hands around yours, has you pick your favorite song and the two of you learn it together. When ever he has free time (which includes the five minutes he has before showtime) he'll sit you down and have you practice.

"Let's see," he pulls you down onto him.

"I'm not there yet," you're all bashful and shy like the other fan girls. You're not really musically inclined, you dabble sure but negotiation's are your world.

"Yeah you are, come on play." He doesn't grab onto your hands this time, forcing you to play on your own.

"How was that," you're eager for his validation.

"Certified drummer baby, might take my job."

"Don't gaslight."

"'M not."

One day he pulls you on stage for an encore. He gets up from his stool, sits you down instead and has the whole band play your favorite song as a live concert.

Rocker Bakugo who plays dumb when you're talking about laws and contracts. You know full well he understands what you're talking about. When everything was young; your relationship, careers, and ages, the two of you went to get your degrees together.

He'd help you study and was one of the top of your class. You both walked the stage together. Fast forward and his degrees just sitting there in his studio while his eye candy of a manager takes care of everything for him.

"What's that," he ask interrupting you when you use a 'big legal word.'

"Katsuki," you whine.

"What? I'm fuckin' confused explain it to me."

"You understand, I know you understand."

"Brain's melted from all those guitar riffs love, nothing in here but music notes."

"Kat," you swat at him.

"Alright fine, like when that sexy voice of yours explains it to me."

"We're not in college anymore."

"Wasn't that long ago."

Rocker Bakugo who slays at guitar hero and has the drum version. When he's pissed he plays, you come home and find him just jamming the fuck out. He's broken the game once or twice it's a pain in the ass to pay. The damn rich boy even owns the arcade version, bakusquad comes over and plays it all the time.

Rocker Bakugo who has to have your validation. (We all know he has an inferiority complex.) Who gets off stage all sweaty and shit, has that smug ass grin on his face. Still without fail always finds you and is like "how'd I do?"

"Sexy as fuck."

"Yeah," he's breathing heavily in your neck. His arms are limp by his sides, muscles sore.

"Yeah," you push his hair out of his face.

Rocker Bakugo who had everyone convinced you were just some girl. You were always with him, even when recording most people kind of just assumed you were some accessory. You always love the reactions you get when you're introduced as his manager.

Rocker Bakugo who people assume doesn't actually love you. The two of you always appear standoff-ish and scary. However this is only because you're always on alert when the two of you are with new people. You're polite but that bubbly personality of yours completely fizzles away. You're his no bullshitting manager and nothing else during those times, all work mode. There's a rule about no PDA as a way to keep up your image and reputation.

It's such a huge contrast from how the two of you are on livestreams and what not.

Rocker Bakugo who low-key has a mommy/daddy kink, and loves your praise. You're unafraid of telling him when's messed up or needs to rehearse something again. And well your boyfriend's learned to swallow your critique. This means that when he does do something perfect the first time he expects you to hang it up on the fridge.

"Again," you're leaning up against the wall on the opposite side of the room. The darkness of the rest of the space makes you seem barely there, you're like a phantom.

"Again," he growls back at you. The rest of the group is watching with open eyes weary of what is going to happen next.

"Are your muscles cramping?"

"No."

"Are you hungry?"

"No," his voice gets louder.

"Thirsty?"

"No," and louder.

"Am I overworking you then?"

"no," and louder.

"Well then do you think you can play it right this time?" Your words make everyone in the room wince, except for your boyfriend. His jaws clenched biting the words he so desperately wants to shout.

"Yeah," he barks at you.

"Good," you lean back against the wall adjusting your shoulders for comfort. "Again."

Rocker Bakugo who fights with you sometimes. "What kind of contract is that," he snarls at you.

"Katsuki what you're asking me for doesn't exist."

"Then make it happen."

"It doesn't work like that, this is difficult."

"It always is."

"Oh don't give me that, you know damn well this is hard. Actually I bet you don't, I bet you haven't even looked at it." You scoff shaking your head, "you're bitching to me about something you know nothing about."

"Bullshit," he spats.

"Yeah ok."

"And what was that shit during practice," his hand is flat on your desk. Your study smells like him and you're not quite sure how you feel about that. It's like he's invaded your space.

"That shirt during practice was me trying to make you better."

"Yeah right," he sneers putting his other hand down on the desk.

"Not everyone's got it out for you Katsuki." You rise from your seat so that you may now stand behind your desk. "You know what Dyna-mighT I can just pack up and leave. I mean you wouldn't want to sleep next to a greedy traitor." You walk out from behind your desk, "you poor fucking cash cow," you glare at him. "I loved you before all of this, when we were broke fucking high school kids."

"Not true."

"Yeah because your mommy and daddy had money to back you up." You point to yourself, "I didn't have that though. I went out on a limb because I believed in you, I took a leap of faith because I trusted the net would appear. This," you bring your finger down onto your desk, "is my income. We don't have to love each other but I am not losing this job."

"Because you made me right, you made me want I am now." He's snarling at your back, you're only a couple steps away from the door.

You snort, "you made yourself. You're really fucking smart, and your gorgeous too but FUCK do you let your insecurity get in the way. And it's my fault for making your ego bigger, this wasn't all you. Go through those records and try and tell me I haven't done some crazy shit for you. Go through documents, interviews, concerts, post, look and compare old contracts."

"Bullshit, I know people that can do better."

"Than go find them," you wave him off.

"You're just a fucking manager-"

"And you're just a fucking cash cow," you slam the door behind you.

[cult-of-husbandos]

Hello, I wanted to request something. I'm still new to your blog, I saw that you had a deredere character! If you can could you write one where him and the reader have already been dating and him and they celebrate valentines day together. I hope my request makes sense. Either way keep up the good work and I love your writing!

asahi haruka [deredere] - Boba Tea & Cats

a/n: okay sooo i started writing this in march and now it's may (•O•) aaaaaand honestly i could blame it on work, or my adhd, or laziness and forgetfullness, or blame in the fact that the tumblr app doesn't fuckin' notify me when i get a request in my inbox like tf! or i can blame all 4 and you can just blame me lmao. anyway, i hope you like it! sorry if it's not what you wanted. instead of valentines day, i made it into a cute anniversary date with a clingy, femboy twink boyfriend.

genre: fluff, high-school sweetheart vibes

word count: 3.9k

warnings: none

You let out a yawn as the school bell chimed, signaling the end of after school clubs and tutoring sessions. You lazily stretched and watched as the other club members gathered their bags and talked about their plans for the weekend. You pulled out your phone, scrolling through missed messages.

“Bye, Y/N-chan~!” called one of the club members. “See you Monday.”

“Yeah, bye~.” you waved as the last club member left.

You went back to your phone. Trying to catch up on your texts before the teachers started circulating. Your phone buzzed, signaling that you got a new message. You opened the text and smiled softly.

‘Did you already go home? (ó﹏ò｡)’

Giggling, you text back.

‘Nope. I’m still packing up. I’ll meet you by the gate.’

Ever since you were children, Asahi Haruka had been by your side through thick and thin. You both grew up next door neighbors, attended the same schools, and shared so many memories that you can’t even imagine going a day without him. Asahi is the embodiment of a golden retriever with bright colored hair – adorable, affectionate, and endlessly optimistic. His infectious laughter is like music to your ears, and his boundless energy is like a puppy touching grass for the first time.

However, there was something undeniably magical about the transition from friends to something more. You two are dating. And both of you are complete idiots for each other. Asahi Haruka had stolen your heart completely.

You don’t know when you started having feelings for Haruka, but you can’t imagine a world without him. It sounds cliché, like it came out of a crappy Lifetime movie, but before either of you knew it you had become each other’s confidants. Sharing small touches, talking about your hopes, dreams, and fears, sneaking kisses in your room. By the time you reached high school, you both confessed. At the same time. You could always read his mind and he could read you like a book. It was as if you were two halves of the same whole, inseparable and bound by an unbreakable bond.

He’s your sun.

Just as you were finished packing and about to stand up, two soft hands covered your eyes and the scent of sweet cologne made you smile.

“Guess who~?” called a voice, a slight mischievous giggle practically giving him away.

You feigned a gasp. “Oh woah! Who could it be?”

You formed a mischievous plan of your own. Time for your favorite activity: teasing your boyfriend.

You hummed. “Judging by the six rings on each hand, it must be Kuro-kun!”

“Bzzt! Wrong!” said the voice. You could tell he was pouting slightly. “You better be joking! Try again!”

“Of course I’m joking!”

“Then, guess my name!” the voice said cheerfully.

��Hmm~, is it… Lina-chan?”

“Wrong again!”

“Oh! I got it now! This is definitely Kou-kun!”

“Nuh-uh!”

“Totally gotta be Haru.”

“Noooo~!!”

“Well, with whining like that, it must be Tsumiko-kun!”

“N/N-chaaaaaan~!”

You couldn’t hold back your laughter. Teasing Haruka was not only easy, but incredibly funny. Even with his fingers and rings pressed to your eyes, you could tell he was pouting up a storm. You tenderly stroked his fingers and laughed again in feigned revelation.

“Oooh! It’s you, Haruka~.” You removed his hands from your eyes and looked up at him with a smile. “I knew it was you.”

Staring up at your boyfriend, you could clearly see that you were right and he was pouting super hard. You kissed his hand and his pout melted into a silly grin. Yet, his eyes still held a grudge.

“N/N-chan! That was really mean…” he pouted. “You shouldn’t call your boyfriend another guy’s name.”

You giggled, leaning forward in your seat. “I’m sorry. I couldn’t help it. You’re just too cute when I tease you.”

Haruka blushed. You finished packing up your things and stood up from your chair. You grabbed Haruka’s hand. “Come on, let’s go home.”

Haruka smiled. We could. Or…” He bumped your shoulder playfully. “I can take you somewhere awesome!”

You raised an eyebrow quizzically. “Somewhere awesome, huh? And where would that be?”

Haruka smiled and gave your hand a slight tug. “It’s a surprise! It’s also close to the station so afterwards we can go home together.”

“Haruka, we’ve been going home together since primary school.”

“That’s not the point!” he huffed playfully. “Besides, today is super duper special!”

“Really?” you asked. “What’s today?”

“Today is…” he paused for dramatic effect, making you roll your eyes in the process. “Our 100 Day Anniversary!!”

Ah, of course. How could you forget?

Anniversaries were nothing new in this relationship. Especially when it came to Haruka. He celebrates everything. Friendiversaries, childhood traditions, milestones, etc.. Ever since you two started dating, he’s even added monthly anniversaries to the list. You didn’t mind it. Every milestone, tradition, and anniversary with Haruka made your heart skip a beat and cherish those memories even more.

“Wow. Today is special.” you smiled, opening the classroom door. “Well, let’s get going before we get scolded. I wanna see this super awesome place. If Haruka likes it, it must be good!”

Haruka smiled brightly and With his hand in yours, you left school and you couldn't help but feel a flutter of excitement in your chest.

*****

“And then, Sensei blabbed for an hour about how I should be paying attention…” Haruka complained. “It’s not my fault I always fall asleep in his class… if he wasn’t so boring…”

As you walked through the bustling streets, you both talked about things going on with friends and school. Of course, Haruka vented to you about how he fell asleep twice in class. You chuckled.

“Hmm… if only someone had listened to my advice and not stayed up playing otome games all night.” you hummed.

“Dreamhunter has an event that allows you to collect 12 SSR cards, each with unique date timelines and rare CG’s and I’m supposed to pass on that?!”

You laughed. “Oh, I’m sure your waifus and husbandos appreciate your determination. Maybe they can help you next time you need to study for an exam.”

“Noooo~. I want N/N-chan’s help!”

“Then, you better stay awake. We're in our 3rd year now. If we wanna get into the same university, we gotta work hard.”

Eventually, you arrived at a quaint little building that immediately caught your attention. Your eyes widened and Haruka smiled brightly. “We’re finally here!”

Nestled on a charming trendy street, the light pink café exuded an inviting aura from the moment you laid eyes on it. A sleek LED sign adorned with whimsical paw prints and the café's name, "NyaNyuBo," hung above the entrance, imitating a slow glow in the afternoon sun. Flower boxes overflowed with vibrant strawflowers and multi-colored milkweeds, adding a burst of color to the café's exterior. A few white wrought-iron tables and chairs sat beneath the pink and white canopy, inviting customers to indulge in a garden party aesthetic.

The windows were adorned with hand-painted murals of playful kittens, each with a unique personality showing. Posters are also put up showcasing deals and kitten mascots advertising discounts. A chalkboard easel stood by the door, displaying daily specials and cat puns in colorful chalk lettering.

“Is this… a cat café?” you ask, looking over at your beaming boyfriend.

“Yes! Isn’t it adorable? I saw a bunch of influencers post about it on Twitter and Instagram! And I immediately thought of you! I know how much you love cats and I wanted to make our 100 day anniversary extra special!” Haruka grinned, his eyes lit with joy.

Entering the café, you had to stop yourself from making a scene. The interior was just as cute as the outside.

You were greeted by the warm aroma of freshly brewed coffee, sweet bubbly fragrances of bubble tea, and the soft sound of purring and tiny meows. The interior of the café was a cozy haven, with soft pastel armchairs and plush sofas with low coffee tables, decorated with scented candles and tiny plants, arranged near the walls and windows, creating intimate seating areas perfect for relaxation. In the center of the café were wooden tables and chairs, each with decorations and cards about each of the cats. Some of the tables had cats declare the tables to be theirs as they stretched and laid across.

The afternoon sunlight streamed in through the bay windows, casting a golden glow over the room and illuminating the mellow decor and sleepy kittens. Shelves lined with books and manga and knick-knacks adorned the walls, while potted plants mounted to the walls and roof.

You and Haruka walked to a table and you basked in the cute little cards and small mason jars full of delectable treats shaped like cats and adorned with adorable edible decorations. On the card it read: ‘Please do not feed our kittens any human food. While we work hard to provide our customers with delicious food and use ingredients that both humans and animals can eat, some of our kitties' tummies might not agree. So please, feed them a couple homemade kitty treats that help them stay happy and healthy.’

You gazed lovingly at the jar of treats for the cats. They’re shaped like kitten faces with “frosting” faces of different cats.

‘Super cute!!’

You were snapped out of your thoughts as Haruka handed you a menu. You tenderly grabbed it and let out a gasp immediately after opening it.

“Everything is so cute! The sandwiches, burgers, curry – they’re all shaped like cats! Even the donuts, macarons, and ice cream parfait have 3D art! I’m in heaven~!”

Haruka giggled. “Me too! It’s like a cozy cat heaven. I wanna live here.”

“Me too!” you sigh. “I’ve been in this area so many times and I never knew there was a cat café here. Was it always a café?”

“I don’t think so. We passed by this building so many times, but I never noticed what it was originally.” Haruka reflected. “Anyway, have you decided what you want?”

You nod. “I’ll have the Smoked Salmon Baguette Sandwich and a strawberry boba tea.”

Haruka nodded and left to go place your order at the front counter. The counter was adorned with even more cat-themed decor and accessories for customers. Behind it, baristas bustled about, preparing steaming cups of coffee and boba tea and artfully crafted cat-themed desserts. Behind the baristas, you saw a small window leading to the kitchen where the chefs were working equally as hard.

You took the time to really look around the café, soaking in the mellow and chill vibe. In one corner of the café, you noticed a towering cat tree where 3 cats slept and played with the dangling toys affixed to it. You looked down at the floor and noticed colorful cat toys littered about and a few customers on the floor completely immersed in playing with the kittens.

You sat back in your chair and listened to the soft k-ballad instrumental music playing in the background and customers chattering quietly amongst themselves, their laughter mingling with the gentle purring of the resident cats.

‘I’m so grateful for Haruka.’ you thought to yourself. ‘He really knows me throughout. If I hadn’t met him…’ You felt a pang in your chest at the thought.

Soon, Haruka came back with the drinks and sat down with a sly grin. “They said our food will be out shortly.” he informed you, giving you your drink. It was even cuter in person. A smiling white cat sat atop of your boba and you felt conflicted about drinking it. “Soooo, in the meantime, I bought us these!” He pulled out two cat ear headbands, one cinnamon and one chocolate brown. He handed you the cinnamon colored cat ears and put on the chocolate brown cat ears with a huge smile. “So we can blend in!”

You stared at him for a few seconds before laughing. “You are such a weirdo!” You laughed even harder as Haruka put on the cat ears and striked various poses.

“Come on~! Put it on!” he urged.

“Alright, alright.” you sighed. Swallowing your pride and cringe, you put on the cat ears and posed awkwardly using your hands as paws. “How do I look?”

Haruka’s face exploded into a plume of red and dramatically clutched his chest. “Too cute! My heart… ah!” Just as quickly, he pulled out his phone. “Give me a little ‘nya~’!”

“Pfft-! What?” you giggled, covering your face.

“Y’know… Nya~!”

You laughed again. “No way! I’d die of cringe.”

“Boo~!” he pouted, putting his phone away. “You should take more advantage of your cuteness!”

You rolled your eyes playfully. “Right back at you, babe.”

After a bit more back and forth teasing, a waiter comes by with your food. With a smile, she sets your food down and bows, telling you to enjoy your food.

Your eyes widen and you immediately salivate at the delicious and gorgeous food in front of you.

“This looks amazing!” you exclaim. You took a whiff. “And it smells sooo heavenly~.”

Haruka nodded eagerly. “For real! Ah! Wait!” He scrambled to pull out his phone. “We gotta get a pic!”

After your boyfriend took a few pics, you two finally chow down.

*****

“…and it was really smelly too!”

“Oh my god! Did you say that to his face?”

“I had to! I’m telling you, it was disgusting-”

Your words are cut off as you feel a tiny ball of fur leap onto your lap. Pulling back a little, you look down and see the most adorable munchkin kitten with cream coating looking up at you. You let out a short, high-pitched squeal/gasp, drop your food on your plate, and scooped up the fluffy kitten.

“Ohmigosh! Haruka! Look at the baby~!” you cooed, showering the kitten in affection and holding it like a porcelain doll.

Haruka’s laughter filled the air as he cooed along with you. “Wow~! They’re so tiny. They must be a baby baby.”

You placed the kitten gently on your lap and bombarded the cutie with scritches along its back and behind the ears. Melting in your chair as you heard tiny purrs coming from the kitten.

Haruka stared at you. “You really love cats, huh?”

You nod fervently, unable to tear your gaze away from the adorable creature, making cute kissy noises and baby talking the kitten.

Haruka soon pouted from the lack of attention. “Baby~. Shouldn’t you be paying attention to your kitten right here?” he whined.

You looked up to see your boyfriend pointing at himself, pulling out his infamous puppy eyes. You giggled.

“Then maybe you should be the one on my lap, hm~?”

Haruka, not expecting such bold words, blushed bright red and struggled to find a flirt back. You laugh again.

Your attention is brought back to the kitten that is actively trying, and failing, to jump on the table. Its little pink beans were desperately pawing at your plate, gazing hungrily at your salmon baguette sandwich.

“Aww~. Is the baby hungry?” you ask. You pick out a piece of salmon and dab your napkin on it to get rid of any of the dressing on it. You bring it towards the kitten's mouth and it eagerly devours it, letting out small little mews and purrs all the while. “Wow. You were hungry, huh?”

Haruka giggles and gushes along with you at the kitten’s eating noises. “The staff probably keep the kittens on a strict kitten food routine. This is probably its first time eating human food.” he whispered, looking around the staff. “You shouldn’t give them anymore. I don’t wanna get kicked out because my love is a rule breaker.” he winked in a teasing tone.

You agreed, turning your attention back to your food and boyfriend as the happy kitten nestles in your lap.

After you both finished your food, Haruka led you to the open cat play area, where you spent the afternoon surrounded by playful and curious kitties. Haruka's boundless energy matched that of the kittens as he chased after them, played with various toys, and sprawled on the floor dramatically meowing. You never laughed this hard.

“I’m glad you brought me here.” you sigh fondly. “This is the best date ever.”

“Is it in the top 5?”

“It’s first place.” You leaned against him, foreheads touching. Under the soft glow of the café's lights, you and Haruka found yourselves drawn into a tender moment, your gazes locked in a silent exchange of affection.

“I love you.” he whispered.

“I love you too.” you whispered back, smiling.

His warm hand cupped your cheek and his breath mingled with yours. Time seemed to stop as your lips met in a sweet, lingering kiss – a slow and gentle kiss that made your heart pound in your ears. In that moment, you wanted this moment, right now, to last forever. And as you both pull away, your foreheads resting against each other, you sigh blissfully unaware of how much time has passed in the tender embrace of your boyfriend.

Peeking from your eyelashes, you notice the warm orange glow flowing from the windows.

“Oh woah… it’s that late already?” you whisper in awe.

“What~?” Haruka whined. “Noooo~! I wanna stay here longer! With you and the kitties!” He flopped on the floor dramatically with a pitiful cry. You laughed and rubbed his chest.

“Come on. If we don’t go home quickly, auntie will get worried and scold you for hours.”

Haruka pouted, but reluctantly stood up and went to the front to pay for the meal. You giggled quietly at his silliness when you felt a small fur ball brush up against you. It was the baby that jumped on your lap. You picked up the kitten, giving into the cuteness. You then felt a pang in your heart at the thought of leaving it here. The more the kitten purred against you, the more you felt the urge to stuff the kitten down your shirt and run out the door. But, you wouldn’t do that.

“Okay, baby. Let’s–”

“Excuse me!” You called out to the employee behind the counter. “Could I see an adoption application?”

The female employee behind the counter smiled brightly and clapped her hands. “Yes, of course! Would you be adopting that kitten you're holding?”

You nodded. “Yes. Does that application process take long?”

“Of course not. Please wait right here. I bring you the adoption paper and a kitten goodie bag full of essentials and a carrier.”

“Thank you!” The employee left towards the back and you softly squealed at your decision.

“Are you really going to adopt the kitten?” Haruka asked, just as excited as you are.

You nodded gleefully, covering your new kitten in kisses. “Of course! Look at this baby! It was love at first sight.”

“Hey~! No fair! I want kisses too!” Haruka whined, puckering his lips towards your face. You laughed, trying to maneuver out of his way.

“You’ve been getting kisses all day! Learn to share, Haruka.”

“Huuh??? No way! I don’t wanna share N/N-chan!”

“Too bad~.” you teased.

*****

The sun had dipped below the horizon, painting the sky in hues of deep purple and soft pink as you both stepped out of the train station. As you and Haruka began your walk home, the streets were quiet with only the sounds of cicadas buzzing in the trees,the sidewalk illuminated by the gentle glow of street lamps. The cool evening breeze rustled the leaves, creating a soothing spring aesthetic that accompanied your footsteps.

You walked with a skip in your step, smiling in content, holding hands with your boyfriend and holding the cat carrier that held your new family member: Naoko or Nao for short.

You smiled down at the kitten curled up in the transparent carrier. “We’re almost home, Nao.”

Haruka glanced over, a soft smile playing on his lips. "Look at her. Already so comfortable with us."

You gazed down at the sleeping kitten, your heart swelling with affection. "I know right~? She's soooo adorable. I can't wait to get home and set up a little space for her with the stuff they gave us. She’s going to love it. I’m gonna make her the best meal she’s ever had in her tiny life!"

Haruka pumped his arm, flailing around Nao’s bag of essentials. "I've already got a bunch of ideas! We could set up a cozy, extra fluffy bed for her by the window so I can see her from my window, and maybe get some of those climbing trees. And a bunch of toys that she’ll be buried in! She'll have so much fun!"

You laugh softly, bouncing off his enthusiasm. “You’re gonna spoil her rotten, aren’t you?”

He winked playfully. “Absolutely! Anything for Nao! She’s our little princess!”

“Woah. Little princess, huh?” you hummed melodically. “I think I just caught a glimpse of Haruka being a lovesick dad.”

“D-Dad?!” he sputtered, his cheeks turning red.

“Yeah. I think you’d be an amazing dad, Haruka.” you stated, smiling nonchalantly.

“W-W-W-Whaaat?!” Haruka yelped, stuttering and getting even redder. “Y/N! It’s too early for us to be thinking about that! We haven’t even graduated yet! A-And I don’t have a job! You also have to be married before thinking about that stuff! We shouldn’t rush things!”

“Huh? What’re you talking about? I’m talking about the future.”

“H-Huh? O-Oh, yeah! That’s what I meant! Yeah! Totally!” he stammered, avoiding your eyes.

“Hmm~? Were you thinking of making a family right now?”

“N-No! Of course not!” He whipped his head away from you, hiding his face.

“Are you sure~? You’re blushing a lot, Ha-ru-ka-chan~.”

“Noooo~…”

“Tonight would be the most romantic day to propose, Haruka. Should I be expecting something soon?”

“N/N… please… I didn’t say anything… please stop…” he mumbled.

You laughed and decided to put a hold on the teasing to save the reputation of your boyfriend. After a few minutes of walking in comfort silence, you turned onto your street and approached your house first. You turned to your boyfriend with a smile.

“Thank you for the amazing date, Haruka. Today has been perfect. Every anniversary you always seem to one-up the dates every single time.”

“Of course, angel~. You deserve only the best.” He pressed a gentle kiss on your lips and you melt into his arms, humming in serenity. As he pulled away, he turned to walk towards his house, but you didn’t let go of his hand. You turned back, looking back at you in confusion.

“Y/N?”

“Oh, did you think you were sleeping somewhere else tonight? Absolutely not. Stay the night.”

“E-Eh? Stay the night? B-But…” He peeked at your house.

“My parents are out of town for the weekend. It’ll just be us.”

“W-What?! Really?”

“Yeah! Plus, the baby will be sad if you go home.” You raised the carrier to show the kitten, slowing waking up from its nap. “And it’s not like we haven’t slept over at each other’s houses before. It’ll be like a sleepover!”

“Oh yeah! It’s been awhile.” he noted. “Yeah, okay! I’ll have to get some stuff from my house and tell mom that I’ll be staying over tonight.” He peeked down at Nao. “And it’ll give me some quality time with NaoNao~.”

As you both walked up the pathway to the house, you smiled. “Yeah, and with Nao here, we can play house.”

“Play house?”

“Yeah. You, me, and the baby.”

Haruka’s face erupted in blush and stammered a nonsense string of words as you led him into the house, laughing at his whinings.

—

another a/n: hey. sorry. it's been awhile. i've seriously been lacking. i got really hype fixated on learning blender animation and minecraft. also, work shit sucks. i hope you enjoyed asahi haruka. it's nice that this fic is the first intro to him. i hope you guys like him! it's been a while since i've written cutesy stuff. i hope i didn't make it too cringe or cheesy or plain.

[naeisscore]

The one that got away....

"Never planned that one day, I'd be losing you" [Reiner Braun x reader]

Content warnings: angst, hurt no comfort, modern au, high school sweethearts, songfics, war, death, strangers to lovers, lovers to strangers, regret

Inspired by Katy Perry's The One That Got Away

Word count: 10.9k

A/n: not proofread, posted this on 2019 Tumblr and wattpad (using a different pseudonym) and I decided to repost it again

♡ ㅤ⭒⠀♡ ⭒ㅤ𓈒ㅤ⭒⠀♡ ⭒ㅤ𓈒ㅤ⭒⠀♡ ⭒ㅤ𓈒ㅤ⭒⠀♡ ⭒ㅤ𓈒ㅤ⭒⠀♡ ⭒ㅤ𓈒ㅤ⭒⠀♡ ⭒ㅤ𓈒ㅤ⭒⠀♡

Summer after high school when we first met

It was one, sunny afternoon when you and your friends passed by your usual hang-out place. You just finished taking the final exams with Mikasa and Annie, and it drained the hell out of you. Being worn out from taking a difficult exam did take a toll on you when it comes to your mental health and well-being. For weeks, you stayed up all night to prepare for the examination and there were countless sleepless nights, meals that were skipped, and of course, a lot of procrastination and spacing out in your dorm room.

Life sucks and is unfair at the same time. Those two girls are gifted, and like, it's natural for them to be genius and extraordinary. While you, you're so, plain, normal. You need to work hard to keep up with them.

Whenever there's a group study, you notice that they never read too much. They read it one time, and that's it. They immediately learned the lesson and retained the information.

You, on the other hand, are pretty much of an average type of student.

As usual, you dropped your overrated type of cliche-college tote bag on the picnic table as you sat next to Annie. You sighed out of exhaustion, your head still hurt due to lack of sleep, and you felt your eyes sting a little.

"I'm going to order on the nearby coffee truck. You guys want something?" Mikasa asked.

"the usual, please." You said, taking a deep breath.

As Mikasa lines up to the nearby food truck, you stare into space out of the blue, imagining that you're rather in another dimension, in another life, where you're chasing the degree that you always like. Wondering what life would be like for you if you took arts and design instead of marketing.

Your world turned upside down on that specific sunny afternoon when Mikasa's boyfriend, Eren, showed up unannounced at the picnic table with several familiar people, but not familiar enough to be acquainted with. He had brought his football teammates right after they won a football match against the opposing university.

You've recognized some of them, which you usually see passing by the hallway, some were unfamiliar, while others were your childhood classmates from elementary school or middle school, the same school you went to with Mikasa and Annie.

The only person who was able to catch your attention was the guy who recently passed by, the guy who has an intimidating brusque statue with dirty blonde locks that match his chiseled features and that striking hazel eyes, those stupid brown eyes.

From the corner, you eyed the boisterous blonde, laughing with one of his friends, and a certain pair of brown eyes observed you from afar.

"Didn't expect our sweet y/n to check someone out, an airhead gorilla-like Reiner, really?!!" Sasha shouted, loud enough for everyone to hear. Your face reddened to the sudden announcement, embarrassed by it. Few of their teammates heard, you hoping your friends didn't, and Reiner himself.

But Eren did.

"What? I-I'm not even looking!" you deny her accusation, looking away from them, blushing from humiliation. You swear you will kill Sasha after this. And now, you're imagining the scenarios in your mind as you plot your revenge against her. Maybe give her with Cheese sandwich with mothballs in it or maybe steal her lunch box for a week, no, for a month, or prank her by replacing her food with food clays.

Her reaction would be hilarious, priceless indeed, and you should record it in 4k.

Unbeknownst to you, Eren was looking, from you to Reiner. A mischievous grin appeared on his face as if plotting something more embarrassing than what Sasha did.

He approached you suddenly, dragging you to a nearby table where their teammates sat.

"Hey, what the hell are you doing?" you asked, caught off-guard by his sudden action. You tried to pull away from his grasp, but he was too strong. You don't feel good about this at all, that humiliation from Sasha was enough for the day.

You knew Eren before, up until now. he had something planned on his sleeve based on his body language.

"What? I'm trying to introduce you to him!" He chuckled.

"The hell, Eren?! You're not gonna do that, gosh, this is so embarrassing---" Eren pushed you against Reiner, too much that you almost stumble from your balance, his broad back was facing you, but he glanced back once he felt you.

And Maybe due to his alertness and strong instinct, he had grabbed your arm on time, preventing you from falling to the ground.

"Oops.." Eren innocently scratches the back of his head as if he didn't do something intentionally. This brat doesn't fail to get on your nerves all the damn time either from his little prank or dirty tricks on his sleeves. If he wasn't only dating Mikasa, surely, you will beat the shit out of him one day.

"Oh, shit. I'm so sorry!!" You blushed madly, avoiding eye contact with him. you're embarrassed, plus, he was attractive as hell!

"Reiner, I'd like to introduce someone to you."You try to be as calm as possible, even making sure not to stutter a bit or tremble from a feeling of nervousness. but deep inside, you were screaming internally as Eren continued his introduction of you to one of his friends whom you've heard that he considered a brother figure.

"I'm y/n. It's nice to meet you." You tried your best to hide your anxiety from the man, who caught your eyes a while ago, making sure not to stutter in front of him.

"Reiner." He lent his hand to you, and nervously, you took it, shaking his warm hand against your small ones. Those hands were big and calloused due to him being an athlete. You noticed he was still holding your hand, delicately.

"Wanna go somewhere with me after this?" He asked.

"I would love that." You smiled.

At that moment, you realized that your hands fit perfectly as if it was made for each other. You didn't know that this little interaction would start something between the two of you.

We'd make out in your Mustang to Radiohead

"Do you know guys?! I saw Reiner and (y/n) making out in his Mustang last Friday night!"You almost choked on your soda drink as you sat in the bleachers with your friends, and you almost fell on your seat as you heard what Connie had just said. You were sure that everyone in the bleachers had heard what he said.

"Connie, you asshole!" You shouted, throwing his duffel bag at him in the field.

"whoa, (y/n), didn't know you have it in you!!" Sasha elbowed you, smirking as she teased you about your night rendezvous with Reiner.

"C'mere, you little shit. I'll smack that shaved head of yours." Reiner had chased him all the way to the football field as your friends burst with laughter, filling the whole field with waves of laughter and cheer as you all watched the meathead of a guy chase his unfortunate friend being head locked with muscles and biceps.

And on my 18th birthday, we got matching tattoos

"How about a Hello Kitty tattoo next time?"You revert your gaze from him to the new tattoo that you both got, freshly embedded in your skin, comparing the matching tattoo to his. It was a little tattoo of a pair of wings, which symbolizes the hope of freedom, you saw this symbol from Armin's history book which he kept telling you for years, that history book was passed down from generation to generation, and that astounding symbol was called the wings of freedom.

"Fuck no, I prefer Spongebob over kitty." You laughed at him as he messed up your hair. Hello Kitty was your favorite cartoon character when you were a child, so, imagining it on Reiner, and seeing it embedded in his brusque figure made you giggle a little bit. It will look adorable in cute to a giant of a man like him.

"Hey! That's so rude, she's my favorite!". You scowled at him.

Matching tattoos on your birthday was what you asked Reiner for your birthday, which he gladly accepted. It's a minimal detail of white and blue wings but it means a lot, yours was white, while he was blue. You had this thought that instead of both wings on the tattoo, you should split it instead, symbolizing that it will only be complete whenever you're together, like a missing piece of a puzzle, because that's what you both are, you're each other's missing piece, and Reiner knew that.

A match made in heaven, symbolizing that you'd have freedom whenever you're with him, that you two should never be apart, like a pair of wings, hope, and freedom.

Used to steal your parents' liquor and climb to the roof

"What the hell, Reiner? We shouldn't drink, we're not 18 yet!" You glared at him as you followed him to the roof outside his window, crawling beside him.

"My parents aren't here. come on, y/n! It's just a zip, so stop being a killjoy."

Just a zip, but it ended as a hangover.

Talk about our future like we had a clue

"How many children do you want to have?" Reiner looked in your direction as you prepared the food that you put in the basket. He was lying in the grass, looking at you as if you were the only person that mattered to him. His gaze soften to the thought.

Weeks ago, you persuade Reiner to go celebrate your 2nd anniversary with him on a picnic date, an intimate, afternoon date to which he gladly agrees.

"I don't know, haven't thought of that yet, it's too early though, but as long as it's with you, I'm okay with how many. How about you?" You shrugged your shoulders at him, unaware of what future awaits in the future.

"How about 12?"

"W-WHAT?!

"Were you planning to have your football team?!"

"Kind of" yeah, with a little mix of you and him running around.

Never planned that one day I'd lose you

"I need to tell you something." You glanced back at him as he walked beside you on the sidewalk, walking you back home as the sun began to set. As the most protective guy and responsible boyfriend, it's appropriate to walk you home.

"What?" You asked.

"I'm joining the military."

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"Are we going to argue over this, again?" You both just got home from a family dinner with his family. As soon as you went home, you both started to argue over things that were said during dinner. He started to pinch the bridge of his nose due to stress, and the heat of words that was exchanged that night. He never avoids his gaze on you, but now, it's different.

Reiner began to avoid his gaze on you.

" You shouldn't have said that in front of my family in the first place. what are you even thinking?" He was talking about your encounter at the family dinner with the Brauns, with his family.

"And what, you want me to lie? You shouldn't enlist in the military." You said simply as you both approached your front porch, Reiner followed behind you as you tried to open the front door. As you entered your shared home, he tried his best to avoid the conversation as much as possible.

Maybe this was some sort of coping mechanism for him since he was a child, by not talking things out, considering his lonely upbringing, growing up in a broken family.

His long-term coping mechanism was avoidance, by staying silent. Reiner was always like this, and what he did was walk straight out of your shared bedroom without even glancing at you, and yet, you still followed after him, hanging your coat first to the near rack in the living room.

"that's not your decision to make though." Reiner unbuttoned his pristine shirt, loosening his tie while looking at his massive figure in the mirror, not even looking at you.

His head hurts from your heated exchange of words, and Reiner deemed it unnecessary. He just wants to have a peaceful dinner with his family and girlfriend since he's preparing to leave for the military because he will be gone in the meantime. But you chose to ruin the evening for everyone.

"Now Gabi was upset about what you've said. You know she looked up to me the most, remember?" He spat back. You remembered that Gabi wanted to be a cadet like Reiner, and she always dreamed of bringing honor to the family, because it's tradition.

The dinner went into chaos when his mother brought up the topic to the dinner table about Reiner leaving for the military, how proud she is, and that his son is dedicated to the sake of their family's reputation, like bringing honor to their family type-of-bullshit. And what you did was to express your thoughts about it, that their contribution to a change doesn't change the fact that war will happen again because people were always the problem in the first place. And also, that killing people wasn't honorable, especially if there's a civilian involved, that it's not worth it, especially what your country was doing to the nearby nation, a genocide towards the opposing nation.

You damn know well this doesn't benefit Reiner at all. This was eating him alive, and Reiner didn't that life, a cycle that was doomed to repeat itself. It's not worth it for Reiner to risk his life like that, no, not your Reiner.

"Military has always been my dream." He added.

"Your dream? or your mother's?"

Reiner felt suffocated, not by the tie that he was wearing from the dinner, but by your piercing words

that were digging holes through his core, sucking the life out of him. Your words were just...cruel.

"You can fool yourself but you can't fool me, Reiner.

I know you always wanted to be a hero, but you're not the strongest man in the world, Reiner. There are other ways. There has to be another way. " You retorted.

"I don't want you to give your life for other people, I want you to live for yourself." You added.

You might sound cruel and downright way out of the line, but you don't have any choice but to say those words to him because he doesn't understand that it's just wrong, and it's the truth, and he's not seeing past that. You would rather tell him the truth than lose him completely.

"Look, you don't understand where I'm coming from, Reiner. You know that I care about you. I love you, okay?! And I will be honest with you."

You don't need to join the military to show your loyalty to our country. You don't need to prove something to anyone. You can show your loyalty by doing other things." You knew there was something in his sleeve that he wasn't telling you.

You know that there's something wrong the moment you utter your thoughts. You are too smart to notice his facade. You knew this. He had changed when your cousin died, and since then, Reiner wasn't the same anymore.

Marcel was dead, and you knew Reiner enough that he was blaming himself all his life. Marcel was your cousin, and since childhood, you heard from Porco how they got each other's back through ups and downs. They formed this brotherly bond together with Bertholdt and Porco. You've seen how they build their dreams, and how they treasure their friendships the most.

You also knew it was Marcel's dream to be a soldier, not Reiner's.

Sometimes, you've caught Reiner checking the news about business and stocks, even searching for the stock markets, and watching how to make 3D building structures on YouTube. You teased him several times about this, but he just shrugged it off. But deep down, you knew that Reiner wanted to be a businessman or an engineer, but the problem is, Reiner doesn't admit it even to himself.

He will fight his family and even his mother about his career path, that he doesn't want to be a soldier, that he doesn't want to bow down to the family tradition of a long line of generational soldiers.

But all his dreams and re-consideration to change his career went downhill when Marcel saved him while he crossed the streets. Your cousin saved him at the brink of death, and since then, Reiner has blamed himself that it should've been him dead, not him.

"It's my life, and I'm going to do what I want. Of all the people I know, I thought you were going to support me on this." He wanted to atone for what happened to his friend, even if it was not his fault, he was still owning up to the guilt.

"Yeah, but not like this!"

Everyone knew that it was an accident and no one was at fault for what happened. But Reiner was too traumatized to look past that. So, out of guilt and regret, he tried to be Marcel. Reiner easily adapts his big brother persona, his habits, and even his dreams.

There's a pregnant pause after you shout, but you say something out of the blue.

"It's not your fault."you're now standing behind him as you stare through at him in the mirror.

"What do you mean?" Reiner freezes from his spot, not wanting to hear those words from you, the truth. Those pitiful words, those it's-not-your-fault words because, he thinks he never deserves that, and he doesn't want your pity.

"It's not your fault." You repeated your words for him to hear. You knew he had heard you right, loud and clear. But he chooses to not hear it any longer. What you said was not a word of pity, but a word for him as a sign of comfort, that you'll always be there for him, that you understand, but still, he doesn't see it. He was somehow surprised by your bold words, unexpected of you to reveal what has been distracting him all those years, it's like you can see through his mind, and he hated that.

he can't believe that you knew, all along.

"It's about Marcel, right? It was an accident, Reiner."

"I don't know what you're talking about." He tried to steer away from the topic but you're still persistent towards the sensitive topic. You're crossing a very dangerous line, a line that he drew years ago. He will avoid the conversation by walking away from your shared room so that you'd never be able to cross that red line and go to that point.

If only he could walk from the other side of the earth so that you'd never bring up this topic once again.

but you followed him, again. You always fucking follow him. Why would you always follow him?

"I know it, Reiner, from the moment you changed.

You know you can talk to me, right? We're soulmates." You know it's not good to force people to talk about their depression and anxiety, but you still did, your desperation for him to choose a different path was much greater, because, it's your Reiner, the most dedicated man you've known for years.

You knew that it would eat him alive not talking about it, and that guilt was taking a toll on his mental health. You're afraid that he might attempt to take his own life one day if things go wrong, especially if he fully succumbs to depression.

"Reiner, their parents, my aunt and uncle served the military, if you joined, they will make you suffer throughout the training, they won't hesitate to send you to a deadly mission. That's just suicide!" You're well aware of their wrath towards Marcel's death, you know it's not Reiner's fault, it was never his fault. It was an accident, but somehow, part of his parents blamed Reiner for their son's death because they lost their firstborn, their heir.

"I don't care," Reiner said. 'I deserved it'. He wanted to add. But doesn't have the guts to say it.

"If Marcel was here, he wouldn't be happy seeing what you're doing."

"Do you even know what you're saying?" He glanced back at you, his cold eyes pierced through you, and his voice was now laced with anger due to your blunt statement.

"You know what I'm talking about, and I'm saying this because I will never give you up to humanity." You snapped as you chased him down.

"You need to save yourself, Reiner, this isn't you!"

"That's it." You knew you were at the limit of his patience. You had crossed the line. Those lines of patience that was hanging like a thread.

Reiner was the most patient guy you've ever met, even Eren cannot be on par when it comes to his patience. Hell, that guy has anger issues. Whenever you took hours to choose clothes and shoes at the store, he would patiently wait for you to finish trying different clothes, and whenever you're mad at him, even if it's your fault, he would lower his pride and apologize to you. But this time, it's different. This time it would be different.

"You don't tell me what to do, y/n. It's not like we're married or something."

"But we will, eventually, Reiner. Don't tell me you don't see that?" That future that you both built up during that picnic date was now, slipping away. He's slipping away.

'You still see your future with me, right?' You thought, eyes pleading to him to at least say something.

Reiner didn't say anything.

"You know, my father already abandoned my family when I was 3, and since then, it's been my duty." He convinced you, but it seems like he's more convincing himself.

"If you can't endure the possibility of me being dead someday since I'm a soldier, then you shouldn't date me in the first place." You were beyond shocked to hear those words from him, heartbroken from the hurtful words that he had thrown at you.

He has a point. Death will come one way or another, and you sound selfish in someone's point of view. But that isn't your point of view. You're trying to save the one you love from making the wrong decisions, and you want him to live for himself, not for others.

You're right, none of it matters in the end, and he can't see past that. Maybe he might, someday.

Right now, you can't find the right words to justify your point. You were out of words out of frustration and anxiousness. Your shame took over your form at the moment because you knew your choice of words wasn't right to pierce through him. He was too unstable to understand that.

You cannot pierce through him, your words were nothing new.

'I'm sorry." You said, looking at the ground out of

shame, unable to find the right words. He sat on the sofa, leaning his elbow to his knee as he held his head out of frustration.

"I'm sorry that you felt that way, but that was never my intention—"

"I don't know if this relationship is going to work."

in another life, I would be your girl

"What are you trying to say?" You asked tears started to pool in the corner of your eyes, you're trying as much as possible to fight the urge not to cry but failed miserably to no attempt.

"Are you trying to leave me? what about us? you promised!" You cried out. 

We'd keep all our promises

"I never thought that you would cross that line, you've gone too far, y/n. I never wanted to hear those words ever, especially from you."

"Fuck it."

"Yeah, you don't want me to die because you'll be alone? you sound so selfish right now, yeah, that's the right word." His words stung as if someone had stabbed you from the inside, and you couldn't pinpoint its location. Everything hurts. He was saying the most painful words to you, those words that you never expected coming from him.

"We need to break up."

You didn't understand how your words had an impact on him, that it'll become his final straw to uncleaved his childhood and lifelong trauma.

You had unscratched his temporary band-aids that he had attached for years, band-aids that didn't help that much as he grew up, you unleashed those painful memories that he tried to bury in the back of his mind. Those thoughts kept him awake in the middle of the night when he was alone. In one night, you ripped those all out, and you brought it all back.

Be us against the world

"I thought we were soulmates.."

"Yeah, we were."

In another life

He put on his leathered shoes again, wearing his coat that you hung on the racks a while ago. His retreating figure forever be etched in your mind.

I would make you stay

'"I won't bring it up ever again, please don't leave."

"Don't leave me."

So I don't have to say you were

"Reiner!"

The one that got away

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I was June and you were my Johnny Cash

You realized weeks ago that Johnny Cash didn't help you from getting your miserable and heartbroken ass out of the couch, considering it's you and your ex's ride-or-die song. Listening to it was making it worse. No ice cream chocolate cake, or even beach get-away can make you ease the pain.

You used to be the typical soft girl who's happy with the way things were, a girl who enjoys the company of books, likes taking a nap in the afternoon, and cooks different dishes whenever you have the time.

And now, you don't know how to return to your old self anymore, it's like she banished that instant, lost somewhere where no one else could reach her.

He took your heart one night, and he never gave it back. You felt scared and confused, and it hurt like hell especially that the one person you loved the most left you. It's like someone had abandoned you in a secluded place, and you freeze right on the spot where they left you.

You told yourself that if Reiner ever decided to come back that morning. You'll welcome him back with open arms and you're willing to work things out for him. This time, you will be kind with your words.

But he never did. He was gone. Right before you came back to the apartment, some of his belongings weren't in their usual place. He already packed his things and belongings and brought all of them along with him before you even arrived. That empty house was left with only your belongings, and also the furniture that you both bought in Ikea.

It doesn't help your case too that you received an email from the landlord that Reiner wouldn't rent the apartment in the next rent renewal. It's really over, you thought.

No messages, no texts, no mail. He had also blocked you.

since you cannot afford to rent on your own, you decide to move in with Annie.

Reiner also avoided you as much as he could. During every friend's gathering, he wouldn't be present if he knew you would be there too.

This was a hint that he's sending you and he's making it clear that he doesn't want to see you ever again.

Ever since he left, you have tried your best to adjust a little without Reiner being there. He was there right after high school where you met him. He was there when you were starting to build yourself from scratch. The typical high-school sweethearts. He always got your back, hearing your rants and frustration, he was there when your friends were busy and no one was there to accompany you. He was there as you laughed your ass out to his lame jokes, or even when watching his favorite Adam Sandler's comedy movies.

He was there when you're crying because you feel neglected by your parents. He was there when you felt you couldn't go on anymore, the stress had gotten into you because of schoolwork and homework. He was there to listen, he was your one-called away, your best friend. But then, he's gone.

What's the point of moving on if everything reminds you of him? He was almost everywhere.

Radiohead and Johnny Cash have been always your and his go-to playlists, during unexpected meet-ups, summer getaways, or night road trips. Those memories do not fade easily, and you don't think that they will ever will. What happened to your love story became a white noise, almost painful to endure the longer you heard it, and that "Johnny Cash" playlist was the only thing you could hear at this moment. To put it simply, Johnny Cash's playlist was one of your reminders of him and his memories, and you're not ready to let go of that.

Never one without the other, we made a pact

Wherever where he was, during his matches, lunchtime, birthdays, and holidays, you named it, everyone expected that you would be there too.

"You're my plus one, remember?" He said.

Because Braun belonged to you, and you belonged to him, you were inseparable the moment you met him, they convinced themself that no one can separate the both of you from being together, and Eren can attest to that.

But now, it's different.

Sometimes when I miss you I put those records on

"So, you still listened to that song, huh?" You snapped out of your thoughts as you heard Annie from behind. You almost forgot that she was there, since most of the time, you tend to space out a lot.

"No, I am not." You immediately hid your phone from her sight in your pocket, scrabbling the screen in your pocket to stop or skip the music. You looked away from her as you denied the obvious.

"your volumes are too loud, dumbass." She tapped her right ear, implying the earphones that you're wearing. At this point, you admit that fooling Annie was the most stupid attempt you've ever made to someone. Nice try, dumb ass.

"You are still in love with him." Annie had said that evening.

A few months had passed and still, you cannot move on from him, you can't get him out of your head.

You thought sometimes that it's almost impossible to get rid of his ghost. His influence on you intertwined to the point that none of the guys had that much of an impact on you.

You missed him, a lot. And you will gladly listen to Radiohead and Johnny Cash whenever you miss him, or whenever he popped up in your mind.

It's hard to move on from the person you love the most, especially if can't work things out due to miscommunication. But you need to accept the fact that it's over. He's gone, and will never come back.

You had nothing against him, he was a good guy, a reliable friend and senior to a bunch of freshmen, and a loving son to his mother. You wish him the best in life.

You know it will take you time before you heal from these wounds, but it's okay, you're going to be okay.

Annie was going to be a policewoman since it was her and her father's dream so, you're going to be alone most of the time from now on. Even Mikasa is going to get her Master's degree in her profession, so probably, you three would've parted ways.

There are things that you regret in the past, regret that keep you awake in the middle of the night. You only want what's best for him, but your words were bringing him down, like a reminder of his depression and trauma, and you're in no position to acknowledge his depression since he didn't bring it up first.

You regret pushing his patience like that, and right now, we're still wondering if things would be different if you never made that confrontation, regret that you should've chosen the right words, not the wrong ones.

But the thing you regret the most is that you weren't able to tell him how much he means to you, and how much you love him, that night.

If you could only meet your old self, you would probably strangle yourself, but what's done is done.

But at least, you can still listen to songs that remind you of the bad and good. at least, these songs will play for you an imaginary vision, the what-ifs, wherein, you two didn't drift apart.

Someone said you had your tattoo removed

Someone said to you that Reiner got his tattoo removed. that pair of blue wings.

"I saw Reiner last week." Your eyes caught Jean's the moment he mentioned his name. Your ears perked up with curiosity, perhaps, excitement? knowing that you'll know what he's been up to.

"That tattoo you both got since high school, he had removed it from a tattoo parlor." A painful sting stabbed your heart as Jean said those words one evening as you went to a bar after a stressful exam.

"Sorry, y/n. I didn't mean to bring him to our conversation. I just thought you should've known." He gulped the beer that he was holding, drifting down his deep thoughts about something, maybe, about someone. He's been pinning over a certain person for years.

Besides, Mikasa had friend-zoned him longed time ago.

"of course, he would, he's joining the military and that's not allowed." You answered. There's a sudden pang in your heart that seems to cultivate as you drink away your thoughts. You tried your best to make an excuse, but you cannot fool your friends with this. Reiner had removed it for some reason.

"And that's a stupid tattoo from high school. That doesn't mean anything tho." that means a lot.

"That doesn't sound convincing." Jean looked at you with genuine concern, he knew you were trying to comfort yourself. From your reaction, you still haven't moved on from him. It's obvious. You can fool yourself, but not your friends.

"It's okay, Horseface! Besides, it was my idea to have that tattoo and, we did break up as well so it's only normal to have him remove it since we're not together anymore." You said it was okay, but the pain still lingers there.

He was getting rid of the memories of you, while you, you're still stuck in the same place where he left you.

As for you, you're doing as much as you can to hold onto things that remind you of him.

He got rid of the tattoo,

And you still kept yours.

Saw you downtown singing the blues

It hurts more when the news about him doesn't reach you through rumors, it fucking hurts when you see it with your own eyes.

You had visited the City of Marley with Annie after you spent the day going to several coffee shops and bookstores, right after spending a good amount on clothes, you parted ways since she needed to come back to the headquarters. Besides, she's going to visit her father tomorrow so she needs to leave soon.

You waved at her as she waved back, watching her figure disappear from the distance.

Then, an unexpected happened at a very unexpected time as you walked down the busy streets of Marley.

After 5 years, you saw him again. fortunately, far enough for him to not see you from a distance. You noticed some changes about him, he grew taller, his build was more muscular and his fashion sense was more mature compared to high school, making him look more intimidating compared to the last time you saw him.

You've heard he had finished his military training, from being a cadet, he already earned his reputation in the military and was able to climb through the ranks. His hard work finally paid off instantly.

Suddenly, you saw him go out of the bar with another woman, a pretty one.

Fuck.

You don't think you've seen her somewhere nor know her from a certain place, but from the way she looks, she's not from your hometown. So you concluded that maybe she's not from here.

She's far prettier too, more confident, and looks like the cool type. You bet she wasn't as toxic as you are. You're nothing compared to her.

This is it.

You haven't seen him that peaceful back then.

This is the part where you'll need to close one of your chapters.

He moved on, and he's happy.

And that's all you cared about. His happiness.

Even if you're no longer part of it.

It's time to face the music, I'm no longer your muse

"Will you love another woman even if I'm gone?"

"I don't think I ever will."

You're no longer her June, his muse. He's no Johnny Cash anymore, so it's time to end this hope in your heart that someday, time may bring you both back together.

It's not going to happen, it will never happen, he's already with someone now.

You're just part of his broken, and miserable past. A girl who brought up his mental illness and existential crisis when things don't go your way. Of course, he wouldn't settle for something like that.

You're part of the problem, a girl who brought back his trauma, a past that he erased years ago.

The way he held her waist brought you on the verge of tears like someone had stabbed you straight up to the heart. Your heart crumbles from staring at them, there's some longing on your part, well, maybe, you shouldn't have looked.

The fire inside your heart was now flickering, slowly dying out from what you were seeing.

You're delusional for expecting him to come back. And it's not his fault that you refused to move on.

Pathetic. How life can be cruel like this?

You never felt stupid until then, stupid for loving the same person for years.

It's time to close this chapter in your life.

It's time to move on.

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"Dr. Yeager!" You're not surprised to see Mr. Yeager in the hospital setting, he was Eren's father, and you had known him since your childhood.

"I'm glad to see you, y/n, but not here." He said. You smiled at him, a reassuring one that it's going to be okay.

"so, how have you been?" you passed out earlier on the street as you were walking outside to attend your campus. Good thing Mikasa was able to catch you on time, preventing damage to your head. As you were brought to the infirmary, the head nurse in the university suggested that you need to be brought to a hospital as soon as possible to run some tests on you.

'I'm good, but my eyes are kind of hazy. I felt weak too. I'm kind of thirsty too." You can see that he's not happy seeing you here, in this setting, in his workplace. You as his patient and him, as your doctor.

"So how's my diagnosis? Am I going to die?" You joked.

"No." He shook his head as he looked at you, his glass was a gleaming reflection of the light above the room.

Not yet.

"I'm sorry to tell you this, y/n, but based on your test, you have acute kidney failure."

"You only got a few years to live."

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"Hi."

You froze dead in your spot, as you saw a familiar figure walking towards you in slow motion, like in the movies. But this wasn't a fairytale, nor an iconic romantic movie. This is reality.

Of all the faces you've encountered throughout your life, the unfamiliar and familiar ones, this wasn't the one you expected to see the most, especially right now.

To be honest, he was the least, and the last person you expect to see here out of this place, a freaking public park in the middle of a big city.

It's like everything that happened for the past years is coming back again, all the good, and the bad memories.

The last interaction with the man you loved was forever engraved in your mind, the same man who walked away from your life on that one fateful night.

He's standing in front of you from a good distance, not too close, but enough for you to hear him.

"What?" your mouth slightly agape as you looked at him in shock, to the point that you didn't notice that he was getting nearer as time went by.

You're not even friends with him since then, hell, he cut you off since that night, he doesn't want to see you and doesn't want to do anything with you. He wants to stay as far away from you, and he made that clear years ago. It's been 5 years since then, and he never reaches out to make amendments. So why now?

No matter how Annie and Bertholdt tried to reconcile the both of you, even if not as lovers, but at least just as friends, he never did. It won't work no matter what effort your friends gave, and there's nothing left for you to amend. that message was clear.

You wanted to avoid this situation more than those useless emergency meetings with your boss, but you damn well can't now. He's here, in his full Braun glory.

You snapped out of your thoughts and strode away, walking past him. You looked anywhere, anything except his hazel eyes.

Suddenly, it's suffocating, and you're more determined to leave the public place as soon as possible.

You don't care if you'll turn out rude for ignoring him. You don't care at all. It doesn't even matter.

Your motto is, 'If he was here, then there's no reason for you to be here either.' and you keep repeating that over your head for several years now.

"Wait." He followed you, chasing you as you moved to walk away from him. His steps were bigger and you knew he would catch up to you if you didn't speed up. God, that stupid long legs of his.

You felt nauseous, you wanted to puke, but none ever came out of your mouth.

"Y/N, wait—" he pleads.

"If you just—" In a split second, he caught up to you, holding your wrist firmly, not too tight, and pulled you against him which forced you to turn around.

"You look pale. You okay?" His eyes softened as he stared at your face, looking at you with concern. The same face that he had only seen in pictures for years which was probably outdated. The face that was living rent free in his mind, 24/7. That face that he hadn't seen in years.

"thank you for the compliment." You said sarcastically.

"Sorry. That sounds rude." He scratches the back of his head, not intending to offend you or whatsoever.

"I shouldn't be here, I'm leaving." You'd rather leave than have him see you again, especially like this.

"Please.. It's been a while since I last saw you. Can't we talk?" He asked.

"I just passed by, then I saw you. Just wanted to know how have you been?" A lie, it's not usual to see a soldier in this area, specifically him, a high-ranking official. unbeknownst to your knowledge, he went to this exact place just to see you. He wanted to talk, alright?

"I'm okay."

"From what happened in the past, I.... I apologize. Please, let me explain" He said.

"You never gave me chance to explain, so why should I let you?" You spat out.

He only realized how bad his situation was when it was too late.

You're right all along and he was stupid enough not to realize what was happening right before his eyes.

That incident in Paradis City, where he learned the corruption inside the capital, how they kept people as prisoners on their land. The military he was in, and the government he served kept a concentration zone for Eldian families, whom they considered as immigrants in their land.

You see, the Marley government succeeded in invading a small portion of Paradis Country. For those who were caught, the government released a mandate that separated family members who don't have Eldian blood from their Eldian families, like the one he witnessed in the camp when a Japanese mother was separated by force from her children and Eldian husband, and vice versa.

A month ago, he and his team were ordered to kill hundreds of people in the internment zone, soldiers like him were sent because there were several riots inside the camp, to the point it set the whole building on fire. They thought it was some act of terrorism. He was so ignorant not to notice that those people fought for their lives, he should have known that it wasn't terrorism from those people, they were fighting back only to defend their loved ones since the government sent an order to kill Eldians in the internment zone one by one. Those people were innocent and only discriminated against because of their bloodline and religion.

This week, Reiner also suspected that Mr. and Mrs. Galliard intentionally took Gabi as a recruit. Because no cadet in training would be accepted that easily in a year and sent to a mission. He speculated that they did this to get revenge on him.

That day, a realization hit him hard, as if he woke up from a deep and long dream, nightmares full of terror and death of his comrades, and full of nightmares without you.

Every night, Reiner has nightmares about the innocent people he killed, crying and pleading with him for their lives. But he can't defy a military order, especially from the higher-ups. He signed up for this, and he would pay the price afterward. Since those incidents, he always woke up in the middle of the night, panting and crying for no apparent reason, traumatized by everything that happened for the past few years.

'She was right, all along, she was telling the truth. Because, to put it simply, she cares.' He thought. He understands now how heavy this profession is, and you knew all about this because you belonged to a military family from generation to generation. You knew how it might take away everything from him. Your words haunt him, every night.

"No, what I mean is. Why are you approaching me? It's not normal." He was taken aback by your statement.

It's not normal to talk to your ex like nothing happened, especially if that said ex never wants to see you ever again.

"Not if it's you." You can't read what was in those eyes, his motive was still unclear to you.

10 years had passed since you two broke apart, and it's been 7 years since you last saw him. You could say that the both of you changed a lot, while you, of course, become thinner than usual, paler, and weaker as time passed by. He wonders why.

But at least, you got your degree right after college and now working as a writer for a well-known publishing company, not the marketing one that your parents urge you to.

While Reiner, throughout the years of battle and war, you've heard from your colleagues that he's a Vice Commander in the military, and of all the people, you know he deserved that spot the most.

"So, I've heard you are not feeling well. how have you been?" How did he know that you were sick? You thought. Maybe he heard it from their mutual friends from your hometown since you went home a lot more than usual for the past 10 years.

Unbeknown to your knowledge, that one afternoon in the barracks, Reiner had heard a conversation from a distance when one of their mutual comrades, Hitch, asked Annie Leonhardt through the phone, and on a freaking loudspeaker, why does she spaced out a lot these past few days and Annie answered that it's about your well-being. Annie had mentioned that you were rushed to the hospital the other day, Mikasa had informed her through calls because she's the one who brought you to the infirmary.

Annie also talked about how she applied for a 1-week leave since she's planning to visit you at the hospital. That's how important you are to Annie and Mikasa, they treated you as their sister.

'I already told you just now that I'm fine. Are you deaf or something?'

"I should be the one to ask you the same thing, how's life been treating you?" You reverted the topic about you and changed it. But Reiner doesn't fail to notice your body language and the typical-aversion-of-gaze that you're indeed, lying. You're far from okay.

"Things have been okay to me." He answered simply. Looking at the ground, ashamed to tell you the truth that it's been a living hell for him for the past 10 years, how his mission damaged his morals as a human, and how he became a murderer for killing hundreds, no, thousands of innocent people.

His oath was to defend the country and serve its people, but he realized that he was doing the opposite.

He was never a hero, and he will never be.

He was a monster sent by the Marleyan Government for genocide, like a programmed robot whose only purpose is to destroy all kinds of life. He hated himself and was ashamed of how monster he had become.

there's a dead silence that seems to surround the both of you. That eerie sound of desperation to have a normal conversation. As you sat in the park, you watched the kids play on the swings, how carefree they were like no amount of responsibilities was holding them down.

You both wished you could be a kid again.

Reiner wanted to ask what are you up to, and how was your family. Are you somewhat happy with how things are? But who was he to initiate a conversation? He's the one who ended it all.

You both are strangers to each other, but with history. He was long gone in your life, not even considering giving you a chance to explain yourself that night.

On the other hand, you're busy wondering where was the guy you've been scheduled to meet today. What's taking him so long? He should be here by now. You will kill him if he didn't save your ass here. You thought.

"I see. you still have that." He chuckled, seeing the wings tattoo on your wrist after all these years. You looked at him, then at your wrist.

"Of course, it's my first tattoo." You rolled your eyes at him, and immediately hid your wrist away from his curious eyes, grasping it away with your other hand.

Ah, he was talking about the tattoo you got on your 18th birthday.

Why did you still have that?

That's the question that you keep asking yourself.

"This doesn't mean other things." You tried to explain yourself.

He had removed his matching tattoo years ago, so what made his heart flutter now knowing that you keep yours all these years?

a single brand of ink but still brought back painful memories.

The ink seemed to fade for years but the memories didn't.

"(y/n)! I brought you some food." A guy shouted from a distance, waving his hands. Reiner noticed how your attention switched from him, then to the guy behind him. Seeing how your mood changed just from the mere presence of another person. You smiled at the guy behind him, forcing Reiner to glance back to see who the guy was.

Your smile was your greatest asset, the one that he loves the most, and you rarely do it now. But he's seeing it again.

The guy lifts his hands cheerfully from a distance, holding the paper bag full of food. This guy never failed to make you smile, he was a cheerful and honest guy, a great company, which sometimes, wants you to smack him in the head for being straight to the point, even if no one asked about things, he would say it right away.

You respected his dedication to his job, driven by his dreams and passion. His idealistic persona and calm demeanor outshine other people, his smiling face and urge to understand every situation made you choose him from the rest.

He makes a beeline step towards you, approaching you with a smile, his eyes study your composure, how uncomfortable you were due to the presence of someone you least expected.

When Reiner glanced back, the guy noticed who was causing your anxious demeanor.

"Hey, Reiner. Didn't expect you would be here." The guy said, smiling at the blonde muscular man who was sitting across from your seat. He laid down the paper bags and beverages on the table, sitting beside you.

"Marco." Reiner acknowledges. So, Marco Bott, a respected guy with a calm demeanor on the Rugby team, a guy with an excellent judge of character, was one of the juniors they interacted with during their senior years. He was one of the guys he trained for the rugby team, alongside, Connie Springer.

"I didn't think you two were dating." He had assumed, because from the look of it. You're comfortable being around him, even giving him a small smile despite your discomfort.

Is Reiner too late to pick things up from what he had left? where have words been left unsaid since that fateful night?

"ah, no, are you out of your mind? I'm just here to accompany her since Annie and Mikasa couldn't make it. Plus, I'm her assistant." He raised his professional nametag proudly, showing how he managed to earn his job and reputation as your successor in the industry.

"ah, sorry." He chuckled, relief that you're not seeing someone.

There was a lingering pang in his chest a moment ago, and he froze on his spot. Reiner thought he couldn't breathe for a second.

Marco had invited him to eat lunch with him and y/n since he brought food. Reiner had this urge to buy something, so he went to a nearby coffee shop and beverages shop to buy some Iced Coffee and Iced Tea from Starbucks from a nearby store, on his way back to the park, he saw a vending machine of sodas, took a Coca-Cola drink, and bottles of water.

He remembered how you used to buy a bottle of soda, like a lot whenever you both went to the grocery stores back then.

One time you got sick, and that same day, you had asked him to get you a soda drink, a Coca-Cola, and pizza as he made his way home from a guy's night out. This led you to call him names such as being a grade-A asshole because the moment he came back, he bought you juice instead of soda because last time he remembered when you drank soda while you're sick, your symptoms worsen.

He chuckled at the memory of you while walking down the streets.

When he returned, he placed the drinks on the table. Reiner handed you a soda, your favorite one.

"She can't drink that. It's bad for her health." Marco said when he saw Reiner handing the Cola drink in his hand to you.

All this money can't buy me a time machine, no

"what do you mean?" Reiner asked. It was your favorite drink throughout the years since high school up until you guys moved together. So why would it be bad for your health?

There's no way you couldn't drink that, you wouldn't dare to resist a soda since it's your favorite drink. Unless...

'Marco." You warned.

Can't replace you with a million rings,

"She's been diagnosed with chronic kidney disease," Marco added. This is the thing you hated about Marco, he was bringing up personal matters in the conversation. He could've said something else.

I should've told you what you meant to me

Reiner can't believe what he's hearing. Everything came crashing down to him, he froze from his spot, unable to find the right words to say. He's feeling...numb, angry, and... scared.

Scared for your life.

"how's her treatment so far?" He had bombarded Marco with questions because he'd answer all of them instead of you. The guy is honest, while, you're the type of person to be annoyed when people meddle with your matters, especially with your warning to Marco a while ago.

"It's none of your business, this is a personal matter." You added.

"Aside from that. There's no point." I'm already at my last stage.

'Cause now I pay the price

From what he experienced all these years, from the bombs that killed the enemy soldiers from foreign countries to the explosions that destroyed millions of worth of infrastructure and properties, he was never afraid of those, except for this moment, he had never felt this scared before.

Reiner likes to think that he's one of the strongest men alive, with no fear and conscience for all the things he did. That was no freaking way he could feel fear, even in front of his enemies on the battlefield. But he never felt fear like this before, the thought of you dying, that he'll outlive you, that hearing one day from your mutual friends that you passed away, gone from his life forever. He can't picture a life without you in this world.

He's a man in the frontline, he's the one who should be at risk for being dead.

Not you, god, not you.

He now knows what fear is, and that's the fear of losing you.

Reiner can't imagine a world without you, a lifetime without you. 

He began to contemplate what he said in the past, that he never wanted to see your face ever again. Reiner didn't mean it, but it seems the gods were cruel enough to make those words paint back to life.

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"why didn't you go with the treatment?" He chased after you, not wanting to hear him pestering you. It's funny how the table turned, back then you chased him a lot to confront him, but now he's doing the same damn thing.

The pavements of the side streets seem to carve your heavy footsteps as you watch him stop in his tracks. A while ago, you walked out, and he asked to walk with you, and of course, you declined.

What's that for? Ex doesn't do that.

Even with your refusal, he decided to follow you like a lost dog.

"What?" You deadpanned, looking at his towering figure.

"That's not for you to decide." You returned his words that night and he never failed to notice, even the small details.

"It is!! We were schoolmates, and... friends!! We had a lot of history together so of course I care about you!" He said in frustration.

"Former." You added.

"What the hell do you want from me, Reiner? You made it clear to stay as far away from you, and I did."

"You know I didn't mean it. All of it." Reiner held your wrist, not letting it go as he held it firmly in his grasp. His hazel eyes looked at yours back.

" but you still said it." You said.

"I'm sorry for everything that I've said to you, y/n. I'm sorry for walking away from you, I know what I did was unforgivable, just please, let me make it up to you."

"I don't need that. It's all in the past now."

"And what's the point of that freaking treatment? It doesn't change anything."

"What do you mean? Of course, there would be!" He convinced you, but he's more convincing himself from his tone.

"You think I'd refuse this easily to save my own life? You don't know how desperate I was before to just give it up now!"

"That's not what I mean—" Reiner reasoned out.

"You don't have the right to say that there would be, what happened to me for the past 10 years, No, you don't have a freaking idea what I'be been through before I refuse the treatments." You spat out.

"I'd lost my only parent who cares about me, my dad..." you added.

"Dad donated his kidney for me." You continued.

"After a year of that stupid kidney transplant, he got sick and died. Then what? My body had rejected what he gave to me."

"It's all for nothing... this doesn't make any sense."

"I'm tired from all of this." You revealed.

"Please, at least try.. there's still hope. I know there will be some changes if you just don't give up." Reiner pleaded.

" you don't get to tell me that, Reiner, you can't even help and save yourself!!" You shouted. You're trying to hold back your tears for so long, but it keeps coming out of your eyes.

"From who?" He asked.

"From you!!" You answered.

"I.... You're right." Reiner swallowed hard, struggling to find the right words to say. He was ashamed of how the years turned him into this kind of man, a shameless one, a hypocrite.

"You're right all along, it doesn't matter. All of it." He replied, Reiner said. He stared blankly at his hands, those hands that were tainted with shame, guilt, and everyone's blood.

"I became a monster, and..... our unit, I killed a lot of innocent people, including children. I'd never had a reputation and honor on this path to begin with. I should've listened to you. I should've chosen my dreams, I should've chosen us." Reiner cried out.

"I almost died once, from one of the missions, and the only thing that came to my mind at the moment was you. I'd never felt desperate to survive before, and till then, I realized how much time I wasted being far away from you. I shouldn't push you away."

"I'm so sorry for what happened to you, I'm so sorry that you lost your dad, and I wasn't there to comfort you, and I'm so sorry for everything that I've said to you that night. You don't deserve to live like this. You never deserve any of this!" he was blaming himself for everything, how he wished he could turn back time to spend time with you.

Time is a ticking bomb, and you're currently at the edge of it.

"You deserve to live a long life. Yours is different from mine, your life does matter. Just... go with the treatment, please...for me." Reiner held you, and you tried to get away from his grasp.

"You know life isn't fair." You answered.

"It isn't... but you deserve so much better," Reiner said.

"I wasted so much time on this, for us. I shouldn't pushed you away. If I wasn't an asshole back then, these times that have been wasted all these years should've been spent for us being together." Reiner said.

"What made you think that I still want that? What the hell, Reiner? You can't come back in here like everything's normal. What do you want?" You asked, frustration laced in your voice.

"I had this sudden urge to see you, okay?! That's.....why, y/n! I woke up from the bed and realized you weren't there, it's empty. Like, I woke up from this deep slumber and you weren't there..." He's like a man snapping back from a long-term amnesia, more like, a man waking up from a 10-year comatose.

Reiner wanted to apologize to you, to say sorry, for leaving you, for walking away from your life, that night. But he can't find the right words to say.

"Of all the times and places, why now? Why not then?" He made it clear that he doesn't want to see your face ever again, and that was enough for you to not fight for him anymore.

Because you're used to him being gone in your life for a long time.

It started with you staring at him from afar, away from his sight, until one day, you just...stopped. You continued to keep a distance from him Until it became your routine to avoid him in every gathering, and get-together.

"I heard from a conversation that you were rushed in the hospital, and...and I can feel it that there's something wrong," Reiner says, voice low as you urge him to speak his thoughts more.

"that doesn't concern you, we're not even friends, we're strangers!! Don't come crawling back at me when you feel empty inside." You became someone he used to know, and as long as he's gone too, it's as if, part of you were gone too, lost in the abyss.

"Yeah, you're right, i felt empty for years because you're gone!!" He snapped back in frustration.

"And I still love you!!" He confessed.

"And I'm so sorry for pushing you away." His voice was more desperate for you to hear him, to understand him like you used to.

"I'm so sorry, okay," he said.

"I should be the one who's apologizing, you know?" You added. 

"I shouldn't bring up your mental health, especially if it's really hard for you to open up. I learned my lesson not to meddle with other's business and not to care... at all." You simply replied.

"But that's all in the past now, right?" You deadpanned, suddenly in control of the conversation, trying as much as possible to be strong enough to utter the words. But deep inside, you're trying your best to fight the tears in the corner of your eyes, threatening to run down your cheeks as the words start to slip away.

"This doesn't matter now, this, what you're doing, it doesn't make any sense!" You lashed out, trying to push him away as he pulled you in his strong arms.

He paused for a bit as if he was thinking of something that he wanted to say.

Reiner was building his courage to say the things he wanted to. He should've done this a long time ago, but he didn't. He was never brave, he was always a coward, and he would take accountability for the actions that he had done.

"I wanted to make things right, to make it up to you as much as possible." He looks into you, engraving the memory of you in his mind, your lips that used to kiss him at night, your eyes that drown him by just looking at it.

He switched his gaze from you to your soft hands, taking your hands in his, staring at how small your hands were compared to his big ones. He held it gently as if it would break if he didn't.

"I know you will push me away, but I'm still in love with you. and that's already enough reason for me to fight for you, for us. There are no days that you didn't come up in my mind."

"Just please, give me a chance. please, give us a second chance." he pleaded.

The pain always lingers here too, creeping back on you during sleepless nights, forever instilled in you. You thought that as long as he's gone from your sight, you're fine.

But no, you were wrong, the pain keeps coming back no matter how much you bury it in the deepest pit of your mind.

'Please say yes, please, just fucking say yes.'

"I don't know, Reiner. I'm not really sure about that." You hesitated.

"Isn't it too late for that?"

[n0nesence]

Giggling at the misprint in my K-12 CD booklet

Haha...sweathearts ✨

[trivijoy]

　⭒　　　　🌀　　　⁺　　　♩ 　 highschool　

　⭒　　　　🐳　　　⁺　　　♩ 　 sweethearts

@haseulzi

[fizzyscoffin]

This was for a Melanie Martinez themed collab.

It never happen lol. BUT...I really love this draw so much

So... now Alastor and Ziggy as Rushton Dolls And the theme song was Highschool sweethearts.

[vrosemaybaby]

Date night for mom and dad 💗☺️

[st4rrsillyy]

sneak peek to

- A Glimpse Into My Day

au of lawrusso like they old money and live in nyc ( and there married 😳) but im amidst of writing a fanfic with this moodboard

yall likey likey? 🤪😳 its supposed to give

Old money aesthetic, young and wealthy, wealthy and successful, millionaire and high school sweethearts, businessman and stay-at-home lover, etc.

anyways ima try my best to eat up since i lobe this pair but please forgive me if it doesn't make it up to yalls expectation of the story or if its rlly out of character i've never written for this pair until now

From my balcony, I overlook New York. It's huge, such a large city with endless opportunities I know that cause I’ve been there before, hustling through the busy streets of New York looking for opportunities, that well never came if we’re gonna be honest. - daniel larusso in my au A Glimpse Into My Day

[krunktrunk]

Just posting all of my byler art ive done recently :3 I WANT THEM TO BE HIGHSCHOOL SWEETHEARTS PLEASE

[danielsosnowski]

Stabrina/Sabley?

I had an idea of Sabrina (my oc) and Stanley placed in "it's not like i like you" scenary. I really love those dorks but it's ofc only two panels so far plus silly scketches of them as they dated

On the other hand, also stupid Stanley fan kid (it's not Sabrinas, chill)

[mysterysimblr]

Unfortunately, inviting Marsh’s cousin and childhood friend Holly had been a mistake: her mean personality led to her attacking another guest, Abby. I guess picking on Ferris wasn’t enough for Holly anymore.

[amareami]

i knew i was done for when i started to accept that maybe i will “waste the best years of my life” in one relationship

- ami, 4.14.24. ( mid 🔭 )

[eeshiwrites]

held in a moment

a collection of vignettes

I.

Strolling along the river, hand in hand, talking mindlessly. Streams of mirth steadily flowing. Suddenly, she spotted a small plant with tiny yellow flowers. Wordlessly, she bent down and picked one of the blooms as gently as she could, bangles chiming at the movement.

In a split second, the flower was tucked safely behind his ear, her phone out to freeze the moment in a picture. A pair of softened eyes followed her every move, lips subtly upturned. As if she was a planet, and he, her moon.

Phone back inside the pocket of her jeans, hair flailing all over courtesy of the riverine breeze, her eyes met his. Tucking the strand gone astray behind her ear, he deftly took out the flower behind his ear and transferred it to hers. Doe eyes shot up to him, a light blush spreading across those chubby cheeks he loved.

"What'd you just do?"

"What? It looks better on you anyway."

She had to look away to conceal the blush.

II.

"Dada, how many for 20?"

The vendor said five, a reply rehearsed one too many times.

He was ready to pull out two fuchka cups, one for himself and another for her. Just before his hand could grab the paper cup, she held it in a vice-like grasp. Turning towards his companion, he found her looking at him with eyes wide as saucers, as if to say, "Are you crazy?"

No, she really said that aloud.

Wordlessly, she dragged him through the humdrum of the bazaar, her hand never leaving his. He followed, unaware that his ears had turned pink—though perhaps she had noticed. There was a lightness in her step, a jump of excitement.

She halted in front of a gupchup stand, fairly secluded from the crowd, and beamed at the vendor. "Dada, two 20-rupee plates please!"

Excitedly grabbing two cups for him and herself, she began recounting her escapades in the same market. She requested that he try the spicier fuchka. He vehemently protested. She made lame jokes, and he looked at her with adoration. And her joy when they'd had eight fuchkas for 20 rupees, had him floored.

Every time she caught him staring, he blushed. And each time, she fell a little deeper.

He had no idea where the time had gone, but he did know one thing: her hand was still holding his when they had to say goodbye—neither of them wanting to let go.

III.

The stakes were high. Anxiety hung thick in the air.

She had entered the room in a flurry—papers spilling from her arms, wobbling in heels she could barely walk in, hair wild and unkempt. The moment she saw him, she found her anchor in the chaos. Yet despite his best efforts, she remained a jittery mess.

Descending the stairs back to reality, he locked his eyes on her, trying to focus. And then it happened—in the blink of an eye.

Bollywood might slow down a scene like this, stretching time to infinity, but in reality, it was over in a snap. Still, they could swear it lasted longer. As she fell, his only instinct was to protect her—not caring that he might fall too, not caring that his freshly dry-cleaned blazer would be dirty. When the dust settled, both were sprawled on the landing of the staircase.

She had expected an injury, and she would have been right—had it not been for the hand cradling her head, saving it from smashing against the concrete. He lay beside her, eyes scanning her for signs of injury.

When they got up, he began to scold her, his eyes filled with concern and love. But all she could think of was how cute he looked—and how lucky she was.

IV.

Her hands and legs couldn't stop shaking with excitement. He'd been smiling all day, a radiant glow on his features.

Call it delusion, but the sunlight seemed brighter that day. When she reached their meeting spot, it was empty. He was late. Somehow, waiting there felt more excruciating than when they were 900 kilometers apart. At least then, there was a clear distance; now, it was just a meager 5 kilometers.

He was colourblind, yet every mundane colour seemed aglow. Poor boy, shuffling his steps, the driver of his ride opting to drive unusually slow—or perhaps it was just his racing mind. As soon as the vehicle stopped, he paid and rushed out. The distance between him and her decreased with each step he took.

When he finally saw her, tears glistened in her eyes, but their faces lit up with smiles that could rival the sun. In a split second, she was in his arms, her arms going around his neck, just like always. They hugged each other as close as humanly possible, enveloped in warmth and comfort, a reunion long overdue—was this what heaven felt like?

Few words were exchanged, yet the two particular pairs of eyes spoke volumes. Needless to say, they had to say goodbye with faces as red as beetroots (from joy, of course!).

Nearly two and a half months. Seventy-three days. One thousand seven hundred sixty-three hours. And finally, home was something tangible—not just a moving image on a phone screen.

[thefadingyouth]

Love language

We split a bottle of wine, something fruity and sweet

He doesn’t drink, but he’ll humor me as he pours himself a glass.

We’ll try to find something to watch.  

Something dumb but wild, something new, but as we curl up on the couch.

We’ll turn on the same movie we always do; it fills the room with laughs as we quote the lines.

It mirrors the beginning; parking lot conversations with sickly sweet treats.

The late night talks that we still return to become a reminder of how far we have come,

And as we find another movie, we’ll curl up and laugh at the jokes we’ve heard before.