#heyyyy hope you like this i had a lot of fun writing this and i am definitely not done but i still really wanted to share

[gay-dorito-dust]

HEYYYY

Soo I'm here to rq another Damian x reader(platonic). But real quick, I'm sorry if I'm requesting too much or being a nuisance. Pls lmk if I am so I can stop! It's just hard to find somebody that writes for him like dis.

Anyways, basically the same thing were theyre friends but this time it's a diff scenario. So Damian n reader are obvi friends but theyre also complete oposites. Like Damian is intelegent, focused and meanwhile has reader is a bit dumber, daydreams too much, and kinder. They also get walked over a lot.

So he invites reader over to the manor and she meets his brothers n dad. It's all fine n dandy but they can't help but notice how diff they are.

Bonus points if reader talks positively abt him to his brothers and they're all like "fym he's nice?" And readers all like "fym he isnt?" (They're just not used to being treated like a normal human being) ‼️

Honestly I love writing for platonic! Damian. So pls don’t apologise for anything bc I’m having so much fun rn. 🦦plus I don’t know if this will read well as I’ve written this late at night when o should probably be in bed.

‘Am I seeing things or has Damian finally made a friend.’ Dick whispered to Jason, his eyes unable to tear his eyes away from you and Damian followed Bruce through the manor.

‘Nope, I’m definitely seeing it too.’ Jason replied also looking at you and Damian as if he was looking at the human personifications of night and day.

‘The fact that the demon spawn managed to get a friend sure is…something.’ Tim piped up, having overheard his brothers conversation from standing in between them. ‘I can only hope he didn’t kidnap the poor soul.’ Dick added as he was quick to click onto how Damian kept a hand on your arm, tugging and pulling you along when you stop to stare at a painting in awe for a little too long, gently encouraging you to keep up with him and Bruce by promising to go back to the painting later. Jason then looked over at Tim, ‘any ideas on who they are?’ Tim shrugged. ‘Only the fact that they go to the same school as Damian, share the same art classes and is known for being a little bit of a daydreaming pushover, but despite all that they’re still a kind person.’

Dick smiled sympathetically as his heart ached for you. It wasn’t easy being nice in a city like Gotham, if anything nice ever wandered into the accursed city it seemed as though Gotham itself would stop at nothing to see it destroyed, decimated and become as miserable and as bleak as the city itself; So it was rare to find someone who genuinely could still bring it in themselves to smile whilst in a city like this. And for that Dick had to give you props for being brave enough -and strong enough- to be kind in a place that would gladly take pleasure in stepping over and on you at any inconvenience. For it was truly a sign of bravery at its finest.

‘That kid is sure brave.’ Jason signed, knowing that people like you don’t last in Gotham but it was people like you that Gotham needed the most, but how could a retched place like Gotham heal when it’s always been a rotten city since it’s very conception? He didn’t believe it could be possible but there were always solutions to fighting the problem that seemed impossible to overcome. So who cares if you weren’t the brightest bulb at school? The education system in Gotham was shit anyway the last time he checked and he doubted much had changed when he…well you know…

Tim was silent. He was too busy recognising the protective measures that Damian was taking specifically for you; mainly the hand tugging at your arm anytime he thought you were getting distracted or wandering off elsewhere and muttering about how you need to keep or you’ll get left behind, despite the fact that even if you did Damian would allow himself to fall behind just so that he could walk besides you. While he might be part of the majority that didn’t think he’s ever see the day that Damian brought a friend home, never less a friend who was the total opposite of him. He couldn’t help but feel a sort of relief that Damian finally found a friend, and he knew that both Jason and Dick felt similarly from the looks upon their faces, silently observing how you interact with one another.

The one thing that Tim was confident in was the fact that Damian needed you as much as you needed Damian because you were a beacon of opportunity for his younger brother in many ways that Tim was certain you weren’t made aware of just yet. So while he and his brothers may tease and take this piss about how different you were from Damian, they mean well and express their happiness the only way they knew best; teasing and taking the piss.

‘This library is beautiful Mr Wayne! Do you have any fantasy books?’ You could be heard asking down the hallway, followed by the sound of Bruce softly laughing as he showed you the grand library. ‘This library has any book you can think of and please call me Bruce, it’s not often that Damian brings anyone home for the weekend.’ He says as you looked the Damian confused and a little betrayed. ‘You’ve got friends other than me?’

Damian groaned. ‘No. I don’t, you’re the only friend I’m willing myself to have.’

You smiled and gripped his hand. ‘Aww Dami! That’s so sweet of you to say, despite how brash and blunt you may come across, I’m glad to say that you’re the only friend I’m willing to have too!’ You said without shame. ‘Everyone else isn’t a nice as you are.’ You trailed off while a rare solemn look appeared upon your face as Damian was quick to squeeze your hand reassuringly, Bruce smiled sympathetically. ‘I’m not smart like your son mr Wayne, I can’t help it if things don’t come to me as easy as they do others but I try! I try really heard to do my best at every test but…but people tend to laugh of me because to them I’m either slow or thick.’ Damian’s jaw clenched and his brows furrowed upon being remembered of what people tended to call you.

He hated it and whenever he saw it happen, he was quick to utter some threatening words before taking his usual position as your pseudo-bodyguard for the rest of the school day. At first he wasn’t bothered but when you became restless in your pursuit of being his friend, he remembered vividly how people were mocking and making fun of you for trying to be his friend, that he often regrets not accepting your friendship sooner if it meant being able to be there when it counts.

‘When will you get it that Damian doesn’t want to be friends with someone like you.’ One person said.

‘Then I’ll just have to keep trying.’ You rebutted, still smiling somehow.

Another person scoffs. ‘Get fucking real. You’re a weirdo, no one wants to be friends with a weirdo who so fucking slow at everything.’

You merely shrugged, even when someone’s insulting you, your brain doesn’t recognises it as such. ‘I’m sure he won’t mind.’

‘God you’re so fucking useless that I’m surprised that anyone bothers with you. Let me say this in a way you won’t have to try so hard to understand dipshit. Damian. Will. Never. Be. Friends. With. Someone. Like. You. Ever.’ A third slowly spoke and Damian had heard enough and within a blink of an eye had laid them out flat. You blinked before looking at Damian with a bright smile. ‘Hi Damian! Did you hurt these guys, that’s not very nice.’

‘They insulted you and yet you defend their honour.’ Damian asked incredulously as you both walked down the hallway, leaving the three bullies to groan from their injuries. You shrugged. ‘I wouldn’t say that.’

‘They were insulting you.’ Damian reiterated. ‘They insulted your intelligence and your abilities. People like them often hide bigger insecurities than others.’ Damian replied, finding your ability to keep smiling after such things both annoying as it was admirable.

‘Are we friends now?’ You asked innocently enough and Damian knew he had sealed his fate, and so he sighs and looks up to the ceiling. ‘Yes, we’re…friends.’ He mutters and doesn’t do anything to stop you from dragging him to art class.

‘I was alone before Damian.’ You admitted as you looked at Bruce with a smile as you squeezed Damian’s hand in kind. ‘But now he’s here and he’s my bestest friend ever!’ Damian honestly wishes that you respect yourself more because you could claim that he saved you multiple times, but you’d never acknowledge the times where you have saved him by being unequivocally kind, sweet and over all a better person then all of Gotham’s civilians combined. ‘I was finding my first week at school horrid before I befriended l/n.’ Damian admitted as you softly cooed. The boy then swallows thickly. ‘Their friendship is much appreciated.’

‘Aww! Dami!’ You cried as you crashed into him, causing you both to hit the floor in a heap of limbs.

While Damian was cursing mom lethal threats and you were laughing, Bruce had already made his mind up about you and was certain to make sure to have Damian invite you over as much as possible. It was obvious for him to see that you and Damian were good for each other despite your vast and glaring differences, however that’s what worked in your favour, the power to have over come all odds was incredible; not to mention the fact that your friendship with Damian had lasted as long as it has was another impressive feet on top of that. Bruce knows it’s been hard for Damian to fit in and find a friend, but he couldn’t have made a better friend than he did in the likes of you.

You were more than defiantly welcomed back to the manor if Bruce had anything to say about it.

‘Get off of me!’ Damian shouts.

‘Damian, I think my foot is stuck with yours.’ You reply, scared.

‘That’s your own foot- how did you manage to tangle yourself up in yourself? You landed onto of me?’ Damian asked incredulously.

‘Sorry.’ You apologised.

‘Don’t be.’ Damian said.

Bruce smiled one last time before leaving you both alone in the library to untangle yourselves, only to be greeted by Tim, Dick and Jason. ‘Can I help you three?’ Bruce raised an eyebrow at the boys.

‘Nope.’ Dick started.

‘Not really, just…seeing how the little scamps are dealing.’ Jason followed after.

‘Damian? Nice? The same Damian who tried to, oh I don’t know…KILL ME?!’ Tim asked, revealing to Bruce all he needed to know, their breathing behind the library door was telling that they were clearly eavesdropping on the three of you. Jason and Dick looked at him displeased as Tim looked back at them. ‘I’m not the only one of us who thought that.’ He defended himself. ‘I mean it’s nice that he’s looking out for y/n but still that’s not something someone casually forgets.’

Bruce merely leaves Tim, Dick and Jason to their own quarrel, he loves his boys he truly does, but sometimes they’re more trouble than what they’re worth. He can only hope that they don’t scare you off from coming back for good because he was already planning your next visit.

[whatwooshkai]

Heyyyy for the writing game!!! Ah- I hope 13 hasn't already been done... otherwise 17?

The "lucky numbers ahahaha

"I have a proposition."

Ah, vocabulary. Boulder leans their helm back to look up at Heatwave, who is perched above them, staring down. He must be really bored.

"Yes?" Boulder asks, laying their book in their lap. Heatwave's head tilts slightly.

"There's something in it for you as well," Heatwave continues, a ghost of a smile on his face. "You in?"

"What is it?" Boulder asks, and the smile disappears, just making theirs grow bigger. "You claim you have a proposition but you have not offered one yet."

Heatwave takes a second to compute the sentence, before he sets his mouth in a hard line, his snaggletooth peeking out. "We should dig a hole."

Boulder can't help the grin their smile grows into. "You realize that's all you had to say, right?"

Heatwave matches their expression, grin so wide it makes his optics squint a little. "That's exactly what I like to hear."

They don't bother to tell anyone they're going out, they just transform and take off.

It gives Boulder a little bit of a rush, reminding them of their academy days when a bored Heatwave would talk them into doing stupid things for fun. Boulder was always afraid of breaking the rules and getting in trouble, but when Heatwave had a plan, he made it work. Hell, he could even talk Chase into anything.

They've both loosened up a lot since them, and this is tame compared to some of the stuff the four of them used to get into, but it's nice. To just leave and drive off and just not care for a bit.

Heatwave takes them to a clearing deep in the woods, so clearly this isn't as much of a spontaneous thing as they originally thought. They transform out of their alt modes and Heatwave immediately starts pacing, scuffing the soft dirt to make a blueprint for their hole.

"My proposition," Heatwave announces, "is we dig a hole, and you get to measure water levels or whatever science stuff. But mostly. Hole."

"That sounds great-" Boulder's comm ringing interrupts their sentence, and they are Heatwave make quick optic contact, before Boulder reaches up and silences the call.

The corner of Heatwave's mouth quirks up. "That could've been an emergency."

"If it was you'd be called too," Boulder points out, and Heatwave gives his head a little shake.

"If you say so."

Dropping to their knees, Heatwave and Boulder start digging a hole.

[sulfurz]

ೃ༄ SHIELDING FEELINGS (LITERALLY) (roman reigns x fem!reader)

ೃ༄ PAIRING: roman reigns x fem!reader

ೃ༄ REQUESTED BY: anon

heyyyy!! i have a fluff request for roman x (fem) reader. it’s set in his shield days and the reader is a apart of the shield (or a really close allies with them whichever you want) and she’s kind of like the lita of the group. Her and roman have huge crushes on eachother and it’s so obvious to not only seth and dean/mox but the whole wwe universe. So the two guys try to come up with a plan to have them both confess to eachother 😅😅

ೃ༄ WARNINGS: this is pure humour and fluff! basically just himbos dean and seth struggling at playing cupid

ೃ༄WORD COUNT: 1.8k

ೃ༄ NOTE: hello lovely anon i got a BIT carried away with this i apologise but i hope it still works🥹 i had way too much fun writing shield as terrible matchmakers

dean ambrose had a plan.

albeit, it wasn’t a very well thought out one. but it was a plan of somewhat decent calibre.

you see, he had a lot of time for you, acting as shield’s manager and all. what he didn’t have time for was how goddamn dumb you could be sometimes (seth’s words, not his — although he very much agreed).

what was it that got dean so riled up, you ask? well it was the fact that you were so evidently in love with roman reigns, and yet never managed to say more than a pretty pathetic ‘uh, you look nice’ whenever the four of you were backstage.

even worse than you? roman. this man had not kept his crush on your quiet. apparently you were the only one who couldn’t see it, and yet instead of ever acting on said emotions, roman liked to play a fun game of hide from y/n in the locker rooms until it’s time for our match and then i only have to see her for five minutes before. this had, on many occasions, ended with dean nearly throwing him to the ground because of course all this was going to do was make you worry the very beautiful yet stubborn man hated you.

a pretty man, but clearly very little common sense, dean had concluded.

so that was when, after too many training sessions in which you’d sit in silence until your coach brought you into the conversation, he hatched his master plan.

now just to put it into action.

it just so happened the final member of the shield would be a perfect partner.

—

the plan was, in dean and seth’s eyes, bulletproof. they would probably have to undergo a pretty intense intervention afterwards considering how wrong they had been; but at first, their confidence was through the roof.

oh no, dean hurt his shoulder in practice — what a shame! good job seth was there to take him to the medic, a walk he definitely could have done on his own! but they were so smart, right? surely you and roman would talk about something if forced to coinhabit the same space without a buffer?

yeah. they really thought so too.

but after fifteen minutes of hiding behind a comically large stack of chairs, they felt it necessary to put the two of you out of your misery and cry that it was a false alarm.

maybe you two really were more hopeless than dean initially thought.

so came attempt two: the halloween party. because who doesn’t love a good dress up party?

apparently, cupid was more of a christmas fan.

as it happened, vast majority of people brought their dates to the work party, which dean and seth hadn’t planned for, but made the situation even more perfect. not to mention you and roman had accidentally both turned up dressed as demons (finn balor made a playful scene when you walked in) — it was practically a match made in heaven! or hell…

this attempt was easy in theory: set up a conversation about how fun dancing was, before abandoning the two of you at a table to take to the dancefloor themselves. surely you’d get fed up of being left out and want to join???? surely!

except, what dean and seth had failed to consider was that in the spirit of halloween, and the fact that some of the most iconic superstars in the roster loved a good prank, the place was practically decked out with tricks, instead of treats.

dean and seth observed quietly from the dancefloor (they had long since abandoned their girlfriends and were simply dancing together now, chest to chest (hey — this matchmaking was a taxing game!)), practically cheering when they saw the two of you finally getting somewhere.

roman stood, offering a hand to you with a good natured “if you can’t beat them, join them?”, and it was obvious the two of you were so close to finally making that first step as your hand reached for his—

then, a plastic skeleton hidden in a bowl of candy on your tabled decided to choose that moment to make its appearance very known.

and there went your glass of red wine, all down your favourite pantsuit (luckily — it was red too, but the dark patch across your chest was not doing you any favours).

roman very sweetly apologised on behalf of the skeleton, which was the very final part of the conversation seth and dean heard before you were scurrying away to change. they quite literally facepalmed as they walked over to a dumbfounded roman, who still played the entire situation off.

it seemed they’d have to step things up if they really wanted to get through the both of your very thick skulls.

so attempt three was… certainly less subtle.

worse still, it came only a month after the halloween party, when you were still in the thick of your ‘hiding from roman reigns’ era, so imagine your surprise when here comes dean ambrose and seth rollins, dragging roman up to you with the latter wearing an expression of confusion that surely mimicked you own.

“okay.” dean spoke, slamming a hand on the catering table “you, roman, like y/n.”

“you, y/n, like roman.” seth added.

then, like one of those old timely comedy acts, at the same time the men both exclaimed a “now talk!”

and to yours and roman’s credit… you did speak?

it’s not your fault the members of shield hadn’t made the topic entirely clear. it was obvious by now that when it came to roman, you were blind to any subtext, so they could hardly blame you for missing the mark.

“of course i like roman? he’s my friend?” you questioned warily, genuinely beginning to get concerned for the two men you considered friends.

“are you two okay?” roman added, genuine concern across his face as he outstretched a hand to slap seth? check him for a fever? both?

you hummed in confirmation, thinking back on every odd occurrence that had happened between you and roman recently, realising that the common denominator in every situation was the two other members of the stable you managed probably saying something extremely dumb.

—

eventually, dean and seth had to admit they were terrible matchmakers.

when the christmas party that same year had been announced, they very nearly put another thing together, but a swift reminder from the wonderful (and honestly; terrifying) randy orton, the two were reminded of every failed attempt in the past, and their plan unravelled before it had even found it’s feet.

as would turn out, when there wasn’t two idiots meddling, that was when things unfolded themselves.

after the many times you had embarrassed yourself in front of your teammate lately, you weren’t expecting roman to approach you mid way through the party. he had spent pretty much the entire night hovering on the opposite side of the room, and for good reason to. you were a liability after all, and his suit shirt was too nice to end up with wine on it. you had opted for white wine instead this time though, just incase.

“hi.” a deep voice came from behind you.

you had been watching triple h and stephanie dancing together for the best part of half an hour, nursing your glass of wine contentedly until the voice behind you had startled you. your glass wobbled in your hand in a terrifying suggested repeat of the halloween event, but roman was prepared this time, swiftly reaching a hand around you and saving it from disaster.

“i should have probably learnt not to sneak up on you.” he joked, motioning with your (thankfully still full) wine glass in his hand before he handed it back to you.

“i certainly learnt that red wine is tasty but dangerous.” you played along, your heart doing a weird thumping thing at how roman chuckled.

“i’m sorry if the other guys ever made you feel uncomfortable.” roman said genuinely, catching you off guard. it was rare you spoke, let alone when the topics brushed a level of seriousness. “we love having you working with us as shield, but they don’t know when to turn off the jokes sometimes.”

you shook your head quickly, hating the idea that roman was concerned about you. sure, dean and seth were idiots at the best of times, but it was a huge part of their charm. from them trying to break roman during promos to their odd, but intriguing backstage celebrations, the slight unhinged enthusiasm was what you loved.

“trust me. i love working with them. with, with you all.” you added at the last second, not missing the slight upper curl in the corner of roman’s mouth when he realised he was included.

you could already feel the blush creeping to your cheeks just because of all his attention being on you, and you knew you were just seconds away from blurting something stupid, when an equally annoying cough came from your side.

comically, both you and roman turned your heads at the same time to see the entirely expected source of the disturbance.

seth and dean were standing a little while away, watching you with the biggest grins you had ever seen. arguably bigger than whenever your team won.

when you realised what was causing their giggles, your heart stopped.

you had casually followed dean’s eyeline, just a simple attempt to see if you could figure out the cause, when you found it immediately. and it seemed roman did too.

mistletoe. hung exactly above where the two of you stood.

you couldn’t help but widen your eyes, going to take a step back but being prevented by a gentle, yet grounding touch to your wrist. when you looked back at roman, he was closer than before, and it was practically an instinct how your eyes flickered down to his lips.

“in the spirit of christmas, right?” he asked, a grin that told it was more than just christmas spirit, and in fact something he had been trying to tell you for a while.

still, you took your time, placing a cautious hand on his bicep as you leant in to connect your lips to his. “in the spirit of christmas.”

[kaeyas-beloved]

Class 1-A with reader who's a high school detective? Or rather, UA's secret high school detective? Kinda like with Detective Conan! She helps the police solve cases, which she always gets right not through any Quirk but through logic and smarts. It's possible that she has a lot of excuse notes if she's ever late for school, or if she has to leave early to help with an extremely serious case. I bet a bunch of kids will be jealous until they figure out the reason behind her absences,

Characters: Class 1A

Genre: General/Humor/Fluff + Fic/Bulletpoints

CW: gn!reader (you/your/they/them)

a/n: 1) I've never actually watched Detective Conan (yet)! Is it any good? 2) This idea kinda grew on me when I started writing this, I think it's a really cool idea. Thank you for requesting anon, I'm really sorry for the long wait and I hope you enjoy! (and sorry for any OOCness, it's been some time since I watched BnHA but I still wanted to finish this)

Class 1A w/ a Secret Detective Reader

"Heyyyy it's (L/N)! On time for once are ya?" instantly your head snapped up at the cheerful call, blond hair with a streak of black catching your eye. Finishing off a note within the margin, you straighten and stretch for the first time in what felt like weeks. Both hearing and feeling that oh so satisfying pop you relax, offering the male and the group behind a tired smile. Briefly, you couldn’t help but wonder how Kaminari (and honestly everyone else) had so much energy this early in the morning. Though, upon remembering that they don't spend hours pouring through case files you brush the thought away quickly.

"Hmph, that's a first," the spiky, rough-around-the-edges ash blond tuts. You pay his comment no mind, something between a tired huff and a laugh passes through your lips, it's not like he's wrong.

"Heh, the world must be ending." Though you spoke in nothing but a mutter most heard your follow up. Good natured laughter fills the room, you included in its chorus.

It’s no secret that you're tardy more often than not. At the beginning, most didn’t know how to interpret your routine of a flimsy excuse notes in hand and a rushed apologizing. Were you not used to early morning classes? Traffic hold you up? Are you late on purpose perhaps?

“No, no and no,” you reassured one afternoon. Then why? someone asked, to which you left them with a flamboyant “I'm saving the world!” Everyone was quick to drop it back then - not out of respect, but because they knew if they're getting a dumb, zealous answer like that then they can kiss a real answer goodbye.

Of course, behind the scenes many were dying to know your real reasons. They theorized, sharing their thoughts with one another when you aren’t around. Hell, Kaminari, Mina, Sero and a select few all going as far as to make a post it board, red sting tying info together and all. After all, if Aizawa is always there, ready to deliver a quick and light scolding the second you try to sneak to your seat mid-lesson, it can't be that bad, right? Unfortunately, to this day your secret remains shrouded in mystery.

Your sly joke from mere moments ago sparked a large, seemingly never-ending conversation with the class. In your defense, you did try to stay on task, but really, how could you not spend some time with your friends? Not to mention that it's been far too long, the police and UA keeping you busy. A break is just what you need to stay in tip-top shape.

Attention pulled far from your gloomy detective work, the atmosphere felt light, carefree within the room as everyone talked and had fun. A welcomed change.

The rolling of the classroom doors puts an abrupt stop to the merriment. Being around long enough to know the routine, every teen made their way to their respective seats.

Aizawa said nothing at first, standing dead in his spot in the doorway. No one dared to whisper their concerns about if something happened, but it was safe to say everyone felt on edge.

Finally, he speaks, "(L/N)."

At once their world came to a screeching halt, twenty pairs of eyes darting between yourself and the teacher. Other than when you're late, you never get called out right off the bat, never mind the tone used.

Silence stretched on for several agonizing seconds, not one soul making a sound. Tension only rose when a few caught sight of the police chief out in the hall, additional officers on either side.

Shock morphs into fear. What's happened? Are you in trouble? Have you done something wrong? Got mixed up with the wrong crowd? With each new thought that pops up in their minds a disgustingly familiar feeling grows, threatening to consume them whole. Just as a group of students open their mouths to finally say something, defend your innocence, demand answers, the squeak of your chair being pushed back cuts it all off.

…How are you so calm?

Clear as day you appear unbothered. As if it doesn't appear that your arrest is upon you. So, is it just a cover? A way to hide the fear pumping through your system?

As you stand and walk further and further away from them all, Aizawa hot on your heels, the class is left to wonder if history is repeating. Are they about to be so paralyzed that they'll fail to protect a friend once more?

"Don't do anything stupid. We'll be back shortly," Aizawa's gruff voice says and the door shuts.

-- --

They're already planning your prison break, the sweethearts <3

Most rationale has left the room since no explanation makes sense other than worst-case :/

It's Bakugou - who just so happens to sit next to you - and all his smarts that loudly demands everyone to "calm the hell down", quickly adding that "they're not going to jail you cry-babies, they work for them."

Of course that does nothing to remedy the situation. What does Bakugou know? It takes the ash-blond shoving your discarded case documents into everyone's unsuspecting faces for them to believe him.

Cue a loud chorus of "THEY'RE A DETECTIVE!?" Which is true, you are in fact a detective. Or, a part-time one at least, if the scrawled Detective Work in your writing was anything to go by. Safe to say some of your closest friends are somewhat hurt you didn't tell them. Don't worry they get over it quickly, they've plenty of time to harass you, seeing as you’ve just walked back into the room.

And seeing how everyone is staring at you, multiple papers scattered between the group it's not hard to piece things together.

"The cat's outta the bag I suppose," you get ready for the storm that's coming your way, sitting back down and taking a deep breath.

No teaching was done that day.

Like most reveals that happen, things settle back to normal after a week. Now instead of getting asked why you were late your friends are asking for all the juicy details of your case (none of which you can actually tell them). Doesn't stop some from asking every time though,,,,

Feel free to talk to them seriously. You might not be able to tell them much, but if you're in a slump and need to talk it out with someone they're more than willing to listen. You'll either figure it out on your own or they'll end up saying something that makes everything click :)

You're no longer just UA's detective but Class 1-A's personal super sleuth now. Something's missing? Better call Sherlock Holmes. And with this bunch, you're going to get called a lot. You could make a profit if you started to charge them :|

I can definitely see them bringing you snacks/meals and something to drink if you're stuck working long hours or late into the night <3 Like they'll see your light on and they'd make sure to stop by the kitchen just so they can drop off something for you on their way back.

Stressful or upsetting case? These guys are the best at distracting you. Bakusquad will drag you out to play some video games in one of their rooms or at an arcade. If that's not something you're into or you're not in the mood you can always train with someone and let out some steam that way. Or or or the girls will gladly take you out shopping with them!

Many are more than willing to help you catch up on classwork. They understand that balancing class, being a detective for the school and an internship is no easy task

If you're ever gone for a long period of time because your work takes you out of town or something be ready for a warm welcome back and hugs the moment you walk through the door :)

Oh, and you're absolutely right Anon, no less than 80% of the class is jealous you get to leave early and they remain that way even after learning why lol. "Oh to be a detective and get to leave early!" Literally all of them at one point or another with their own way of saying it.

Tag list: @tickotaku // @decora-peaches // @dorkylittleweirdo // @thylocalcrackhead // @that-enby-alien // @xenuuu // @unidentifiedzombie // @lordbugs // @akiria12167

. . .

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[clatoera]

Picket Fence is Sharp as Knives Chapter 7: They Got No Idea About Me And You

Heyyyy Besties. Long time no see. March was rough. It's been rough. But tell a friend to tell a friend she's baaack.

Title from t swift Dress. I almost used a chappell roan lyric but I have committed so hard to the t swift bit I couldnt do it.

ao3

masterpost

It is the long awaited cashbaria chapter, featuring a scene of them during the 74th games and then a post war follow up of them! I specifically need to mention and notice my friends @bodyelectric77my go to cashbaria queen and @kentwells who has had MANY many conversations about these things with me. They write the Cashbaria that I read so please check them both out!!! I don't think @ohhowwehavefallen even uses tumblr anymore but at this point she gets tagged in any post I make ever so..hello bestie.

I am not a cashbaria writer and I hope I did them justice in this fic. It was a LOT of fun. I had wanted to get it up earlier this week for Sapphic Visibility day along with @bodyelectric77 because it's funny they have similar vibes of sapphics being blatantly visible but the people closest to them being absolutely oblivious. Thank you my friend, you're incredible, your writing inspires me.

Alright. Lets rock this bitch.

“Mmm…think they’ve noticed yet?”  

As the voice comes from behind her, Enobaria can’t help the coy smile that etches it’s way on to her face. She doesn’t even need to turn to face the source, as she is hit with the combined smell of vanilla and honey and something floral that is just uniquely Cashmere. If the scent alone weren’t enough, the flurry of blonde curls that leak over her upper arm as a familiar face rests on her shoulder, with lithe hands wrapping around her waist would be the dead giveaway that it is her girlfriend. 

Well, her girlfriend, or someone with a very creative death wish.

“Noticed what? That they’re trying to fit four people on a couch made to fit two?” Enobaria muses, bringing her hand up to rest her fingertips along Cashmere’s cheek bone. “I know Cato thinks he needs to live inside of Clove, but it’s a little nauseating to watch.”

It isn’t even Enobaria’s style, this blatant display of hands-on skin and kisses on cheeks, but it wasn’t like she was ashamed of such. It was dangerous, to give the president any further leverage to dangle above either of them. It wasn’t public and it wasn’t secret, but a third undefinable thing. The kind of thing that was open to their safest friends—Brutus, Gloss, Finnick, Johanna and such—and on a need-to-know basis with all the others.  That group of safest friends would of course include Cato and Clove, if they ever figured it out that is.

Still. They are mostly alone, doing what District Two called “mentor mentoring” but what Enobaria and Brutus so affectionately call babysitting. It was just the right time of day, when the action died down, and victors were either slipping off to self soothe (medicate) or prepare for whatever the evening presented in terms of sponsors and clientele. 

And honestly, if anyone needed babysitting to ensure they actually learned how to mentor, it was Cato and Clove.

“They’re just excited to be together!” Cashmere assured, settling into the space between Enobaria and the bar, wrapping her other arm around her to pull her fully into a hug from behind her. “They’re kids, they’re just having fun. You knowwhat I’m talking about them noticing, ‘Baria. Have they noticed this.” To emphasize, she kisses along her jawline, but keeps her eyeline trained on the four young victors loudly taunting each other on the couch. If she didn’t know any better, she would have thought they were just normal teenagers, up too late and laughing loud enough that their parents would be down to yell at them at any minute. 

Unfortunately, they were not normal kids, and they were barely raised by their parents at all. They were raised by combinations of victors, trainers, and violence in various combinations. 

The four of them, practically on top of each other, mocking other teenagers as they screamed on television, was somehow as close to normal as they were ever going to be. 

Enobaria lets out a little sigh as she leans into Cashmere’s affection, before she gives a little shake of her head. “I mean it. It’s like they don’t notice anyone but each other. They probably don’t even realize they aren’t alone on the couch.”

“And they were going to go into the games together? That would have been a real PR disaster for District Two, you know.” Cashmere teases, before she slips around from behind Enobaria to the side of her, before slipping one of her legs on top of the other woman’s knees and nearly sitting right in her lap. 

“You’re telling me. It would have been an absolute nightmare. We used to think they were this perfect pair, they just understood each other so well. Yeah, it could have been hard when it came down to the final two but nothing they couldn’t handle. But then…you know, they thought they were so good at sneaking around, but they’re fucking idiots. They didn’t talk to anyone else. One was always missing from their bed. They were great together, apparently a little too great. It was a liability to send them in together. I know I was afraid of what we would pull out of that arena in whichever won.” Enobaria took the opportunity to be the one holding Cashmere now, resting her head against the blonde’s. “Sometimes I wish we had done it, though. He’s fucking infuriating. It’s gross to watch them.”

“Oh, you don’t mean that, Enobaria. They’re cute together. They’re happy, and they get to be openly happy. Unlike the rest of us. I’d kill for that. So would Finnick…and Glimmer too.”

“They don’t even know how lucky they are.” It does not need to be said what luck Enobaria was referring to. By some miracle there was never any demand for the two of them, no clients to be at the beck and call of. It was probably becauseof each other, and for that, Enobaria really was thankful for their mutual survival. 

That was not something she was prepared to explain to Clove quite yet. 

“You busy tonight?” Enobaria slides in, intentionally sliding in vague phrasing due to the risk of ever listening walls.

She feels Cashmere physically sag in her arms, practically collapsing the lines of her body to press flush against her. “The usual. The gamemakers get bored at this point in the games until things spice up.”

Enobaria tenses at the phrasing. It was clear what (and more importantly, who) was going to be spicing things up for the gamemakers tonight. She gently scratches her nails over the pale forearms she holds in her hands, drawing little swirling patterns with the very tip of her index finger. “Gloss and Glimmer too?”

“Gloss is with Finnick. Glimmer’s got the fullest schedule of all of us tonight.” Cashmere feels the coolness in her voice at the statement, and if someone didn’t know her, they may even mistake it for jealousy over her little sister’s popularity. Little did they know the layer of self-loathing that overtook Cashmere and Gloss both, anytime the schedule of Glimmer’s nightly roster of abusers was sent over.

“What’s going on with your sister and Marbles up there?” Enobaria took the opportunity to ask, cocking her head just slightly as she watches the two victors opposite Cato and Clove, and from where she’s standing, Glimmer may as well be curled up in the lap of her own fellow District One victor. “It’s like career victor inbreeding these days.  Cato and Clove…Shimmer and Sparkles up there…Finnick and crazy Cresta…”

“I’m not sure. She never told us something was happening with them. They’ve been friends for a long time. He’s sweet to her. She hasn’t told me anything specific, though, and I’m sure she would if they were together.” Cash sticks her hand out blindly to the side, grabbing the glass off the bar that Enobaria had been drinking before Cashmere slid into her arms. It’s always easier, to deal with those bored clients, with a little bit of a sedative in her system. She doesn’t even get more than a sip before she shutters, harshly reminded that District Two does not believe in mixers. Instead, she taunts Enobaria gently, “Would we be part of Victor inbreeding then, Baria?” 

“Absolutely not. We can’t actually accidentally breed. Besides. We’re not from the same district, we’re adding diversity to the Victor gene pool.” Enobaria teases in response but raises a playful eyebrow. “You think Glimmer would just...tell you? Remind me again how she found out about us?”

“Oh, Enobaria that’s not important- “

“No, I like to hear it.”

Cashmere’s eyeroll was nearly audible as she let out an annoyed sigh. “She noticed I changed my nail shape for the first time in ten years.”

“And why did you change your nails?”

Enobaria grins, watching the flush actually flood Cashmere’s neck and trail up to her face. “You know why, you aren’t being funny!”

“I know. I just like how you get all flustered about it.” Enobaria squeezes her arm playfully, before she leans up to kiss right under her ear. “And I appreciate the consideration.”

“Enobaria!” Cashmere huffs, twisting in her arms before crossing her own over her chest. “So, they didn’t notice youdon’t have your little razor nails?”

“Baby, I don’t think Clove knows you can even paint nails, let alone notices the shape.”

“You practically raised her. I remember you coming to the Capitol that one weekend when we were young and asking me how to teach her how to throw, oh it was so cute, Baria. She knows you so well, she has to notice something!” At the mention of them, nearly ten years ago, she wriggles back into Enobaria’s embrace warmly. “That’s how I knew there was some love in that scary District Two Victor shell, the notorious Enobaria asking how to teach a little girl the proper technique. Not just a little girl at training, but one you actually cared about!”

“Exactly. I spent the most time with her. You’ve been part of my life almost as long as she’d be able to remember. I’ve always been just like this.” Enobaria sighs, before she brings her hand up to run through the very end of Cash’s curls. “I actually don’t think she’s ever once considered I may actually like…yeah. I don’t think that’s crossed her mind.” 

“Mmhmm, were you kissing pretty blonde girls in your lap back in District Two?” Cash teases, wrapping an arm around her girlfriend’s shoulders, beyond testing the limits of how far she could go before any of those damn kids noticed. “Cato seems like he knew his way around the girls his age, you mean he never even made a comment about it?”

“Cash, you are literally on top of me, and he hasn’t noticed. He isn’t the most observant career boy you’ll ever meet. He actually was so obsessed with Clove, he wasn’t that hard to keep off other girls. I just wanted to keep him off of— and out of—Clove. Besides. I don’t think he knows that girls...can be with girls. That might break his fragile little brain.”

Cashmere throws her head back in a genuine laugh that should have pulled the attention of the whole room. Somehow, the four of them are so in their own little word they don’t even bat an eye. 

Thank God all four of them weren’t in the games together. They’d never pay enough attention to their surroundings for any single one of them to come out a winner.

“What do you mean? He doesn’t know girls can like girls?” 

“His only two modes are kill and Clove. We’re lucky he remembers to breathe. Or unlucky, depending on the day.”

“Are you going to tell them then?” Cash teases. It’s evident that Enobaria isn’t hiding anything from Clove. They are truly just not observant enough to notice anything but themselves.

As if to emphasize they are truly paying no attention to the girls in the back of the room, Clove can be heard making some snide remark as she gets off of Cato’s lap, reaching down into the fruit bowl on the glass coffee table in front of them. At the same time, they watch as Glimmer shifts to the side so Marvel climbs out from under her. He walks to one end of the room before Clove takes her hand full of something they cannot yet identify to the other. 

Enobaria and Cashmere watching in a shared sense of amusement and confusion as Clove quite literally starts throwing, with unyielding precision, something small directly into Marvel’s mouth. 

“Are those...?” Cashmere muses, tilting her head in bemusement, an inquisitive expression on her face. 

“I think they’re grapes?” Enobaria confirms.

Enobaria laughs, actually openly laughs, when Marvel lets out a sharp yelp as he gets absolutely drilled in the eye by a little green fruit. 

“Clove! What the hell, I thought you don’t miss!” Marvel whines, bringing his hand to cover his stinging left eye. 

“I don’t.” Clove reminds with a smug smirk on her face.  

Cashmere audibly sighs, burying her face in the lengths of Enobaria’s hair at her neck. “…you know what, on second thought, maybe they should figure it out themselves.” 

______________________________________________________________________

There are approximately fifty steps between Clove’s front door and Enobaria’s. Forty-four if you walked fast, sixty if you took your time. It’s not a hard path to cross, even in a District Two blizzard.

It is a miserable trek, however, when someone else’s child is screaming at you the entire walk.

“I know, I know, you miss your mother that we just saw fifteen seconds ago.” Enobaria mumbles, practically slamming her front door shut behind her the second she is fully inside. The heartbroken mumbles of ‘mama’ coming from the one-year-old, with his teary blue eyes staring at the door like his mother would walk in and rescue him at any moment, give Enobaria a sense of Déjà vu she wishes all too well she didn’t know how to place.  For all he looked like his father—and by god Cato may as well have cloned himself— there evidently was some of his mother in him, too. “I’m not going to steal you forever kid, trust me. I know you’d live inside her if you could, but unfortunately for you so would your dad.”

She kicks her shoes off, fully intending to lay on the couch for the next few hours, hoping to lull the boy to sleep until Clove would be back to collect him after…wherever the hell they were going. 

She had tried to pay attention to Clove’s plans for the night. It isn’t her fault that Clove made such a clingy little thing that cried any time he was out of her arms.

“Alright, buddy, lets just stop with the sad eyes, if you go to sleep, she’ll be back when you wake up—” When she makes that promise of a returning mother, she is at least sure a liar will not be made of her this time.

As soon as Enobaria goes to sit with him, she hears some sort of chatter elsewhere in the house. The sound of a hairdryer pairs with the voices, and immediately she knows Cash must be singing to herself or something as she does her hair.

“Oh, Aunt Cash will be so excited to see you.” She is drawn to the sound she shifts him from her shoulder to lower on her hip, his endless babbles of mama nearly blending into the background now. 

As soon as she reaches the top of her stairs, she hooks the right to the bedroom, as the sound of the dryer gets louder and louder. Smiling to herself, she nudges the door open with her foot. “Hey baby, I didn’t know you were coming home yet, I brought—”

Enobaria is stunned to silence as she is greeted by not one, not two, but three blonde girls sitting on the bathroom floor looking up at her. The baby, too, even stops his incessant babbling to stare at Cashmere and the girls.

Cash sits, with her back to the bathtub, hair dryer in her hand, and a little blonde toddler sitting cross legged on each of her knees. She flicks the dryer off with a wide smile on her face, looking up at Enobaria. 

One of the twins steals the first greeting, big green eyes blinking up at her and the sweetest little smile on her face when she sees her. She pushes off of Cashmere’s knee, to close the distance between herself and her other aunt. “Hiiiiii Aun-ie Baria! We’re visit-in your house!!” 

Enobaria softens, leaning down to scoop up the little girl with her free arm. It had become surprisingly easy to tell the twins apart once they got a little bigger, and from personality alone she knew who she was talking to at any time.

 “Hello Miss Stella,” It was always a little shocking, claiming Cashmere’s nieces as her own, and it was almost unsettling at times how much they looked like they could be Cashmere’s girls. Still, they’re sweet kids and they’re cute as hell. It is shockingly easy to love them. “How did you end up here in our other house! It’s a long way from your house…”

“Uh you told me that we were babysitting today, Enobaria.” Cashmere reminds her as if it is obvious. She shifts Aurelia to sit between her legs as she reaches over and grabs a curling iron off the tile floor beside her. 

“Yeah, Cash, I was watching him.” Enobaria nods her head towards the little blond boy, who’s resolved to resting his head on her shoulder. At least he had finally stopped crying—

and hey, she gets it, she likes to look at Cash too. “You just... brought the girls on the train and didn’t think to like... mention that?” 

“Oh, it’s not a big deal! They were excited to come see our other house, huh sunshine?” Cash waves off, before she brushes through her niece’s long baby soft hair with her fingers one time before she takes the curling iron to a small section. Aurelia sits so uncharacteristically still for a two and a half year old, clearly well trained on how to have her hair done. 

“How did you even end up with them today?” Enobaria decides her best course of action is to just join Cashmere on the floor, and kicks the door shut behind her. She presses against the wood with her back, sliding down while still holding both the toddlers in her arms without missing a beat. “aren’t they kind of little for your to be heating up their hair like that?”

“It’s the second Wednesday of the month!” She explains as if that means anything, carefully placing the hot iron out of reach before reaching for a handful of pink ribbon which she ties around the little half ponytail she makes on her niece’s head. “Don’t be silly honey, I used heat protectant on it! They like to feel pretty!”

“Does that mean something to me that it’s second Wednesday?” 

“It’s nail day, Enobaria. Second and Fourth Wednesdays are nail days. Stella, show Auntie Baria your nails!” Cashmere instructs, and Stella does stick out her little hand towards Enobaria’s face. Enobaria, to her credit, does give an appreciative glance at the incredibly tiny pink nails. “I think they’re all doing something together, Glim said she’ll be in Two anyway to pick them up tonight. Like I said, I thought we were already babysitting them, and Glimmer didn’t correct me so...”

Aurelia is the one who pushes off of Cash next, little blonde curls bouncing as she half runs across the room. She settles herself between the two children Enobaria already holds, reaching out her own little pink nails to grab the baby’s hand. “Hiiii baby.”

“Look at you, covered in career babies.” Cash teases, her hand over her heart playfully. “Come here Stells, it’s your turn.” She cocks her head as Stella does as she’s asked, and Aurelia shifts to take her place with Enobaria. “How old is he? Is he one yet?”

“Yeah, well, remember when I called it Career Victor inbreeding? This is what I meant.” Enobaria teases playfully, glancing down at the baby who was finally, somehow, done with his crying. Now, he just stared at the twins with wide blue eyes, fascinated by the shimmering gold ribbons on the middle of their dresses. “Mmm… he’ll be one I think next month. It’s soon.”

“He’s just so freaking big. He’s like... twin sized and they’re nearly three.” She mumbles, taking a few moments just to hold Stella in her lap rather than go straight for her hair.  “Oh, come on, Enobaria, at least they’re cute! They’re so worth it. And we get to give them back at the end of the day, that’s the best part.”

“Of course he’s huge, his dad is a mammoth.” Enobaria reminds, gently prying his hands off of Aurelia’s tulle skirt that he had managed to lean forward to grab. “They are pretty cute kids; I’ll give them that. Even if this one looks like his dad.”

“Poor Clove, he’s practically bigger than her. That had to hurt...” Cashmere mumbles, going back to her task of brushing through Stella’s soft hair. 

“….Cash?”

“Yeah, baby?” She replies absently, spritzing Stella’s hair before going in with the curling iron. 

“…we are watching all the kids. All their parents are alone right now.”

“Yeah, and? I think they were doing something tonight?”

“Yeah, probably each other!” Enobaria nearly hisses.

“Oh, relax Enobaria! They aren’t doing that! Aren’t they all together?”

Enobaria half whispers, glancing between the two little blond kids she held and the one in Cashmere’s lap. “They won’t be together all night. We are not watching a fourth one, Cash. I draw the line at a fourth. How did we end up watching three children who do not belong to us?” 

Cashmere tries to stifle her giggle, failing miserably as she reminds her, “we didn’t pay enough attention when babysitting their parents.”

[pebblysand]

Heyyyy im dying for an update on castles!! Any hope of getting one soon?😭💗

hi anon! thanks for your message! the tl;dr answer to this is: no.

or, i don't know. maybe? sigh. it's just been a lot lately.

it's a funny one, you know? most of you will not remember this, but there used to be a time when i would share (maybe overshare - is that a word? i've always wondered why that is a word when it's your platform and your rules and people can just choose to ignore you) on tumblr. not just about fics and writing and peaky blinders, but also about me. the stuff i felt. the stuff that was going on in my life. lots of things.

i grew up in an era of blogging and livejournal (seeing dreamwidth make a comeback lately is oh-so-bizarre, btw) where people opened up online - sometimes too much. this was before doxxing, before cancel culture, before it became dangerous to do so. people would complain about their jobs, their mates - the internet was an outlet. and, i don't know if it was better or worse, i'm not here to make value judgements and i've always thought people who say "things were better in my day" sound like absolute twats, but it was undoubtedly different. i've had this conversation with someone on discord lately, about the dreamwidth comeback actually, when this person said: 'people get real personal on there, though' and i was like: 'yeah, i suppose it's just the culture of the place.' a place where, unlike tumblr and everything that came after it, most of the content produced was through words, rather than images. when the internet was still made for writers and you weren't afraid of "clogging" someone's dash with posts that were too long to be digested in less than ten seconds.

the thing is: i like writing. it makes it easier to organise thoughts. and, up to 2020 (2021, even) i used to post monthly updates on my writing, but also about my life, for you. remember how i told you when i passed my bar exam? how i quit my job, found another job, and then another one. i told you about the boy and hinted at my break-up. i told you about how one of my best friends sank into a very toxic relationship, from which i couldn't save her. i told you when my dad died. it wasn't even that long ago. and, i explained to you that for these reasons, and maybe others, i didn't have a chapter out as early as i would have liked. and, you understood. you were kept up with what was going on. it was the pandemic and a different time.

but then, gradually (oh-so-quickly and oh-so-slowly), "you" became "many." i like that word - "many" - it's what my hairdresser said the first time she cut my hair: "they are very fine, but there are very, very, many of them." i suppose that between the first chapter of castles and the latest, my follower count grew into the hundreds and i got - well, scared. scared to share: what i thought, why i wasn't posting, how much or how little i was writing, how i was feeling. because there were too many of you. because i started to hold myself up to higher standards, too.

the truth is that no one wants to listen to anyone on the internet complain. it's not fun. and, specifically, no one wants to listen to fanfiction writers complain. why would they? why would they moan about how busy they are? about how creatively drained they might be? about how maintaining a healthy balance between real life, a job, and writing, is hard, if you do it seriously. because it's a hobby. because it's not "real" writing. because it doesn't matter.

well, anon, i'll tell you something. the voice in my head, it goes like this: why are you tired? it's just fanfiction. stop taking yourself and your little stupid story so seriously. stop thinking this is Important because you're writing about something you feel is important. no one cares. and: you only wrote 80,000 words last year, people write full-blown nanos in a month, calm down. it's not that bad, you don't have children. it's not that bad, you don't have dying parents. it's not that bad, you have money. you're a white cis privileged girl who can afford to spend her free time on writing because you don't have to work multiple paying jobs to foot the bills. so many people do. people who are much busier than you write a lot more than you do. shut up, what are you crying about? why are you responding to this poor anon with anything other than "soon, i hope." they weren't even mean about it.

and, i like the word "many" because it encompasses the realness of it, the repetition of it. many, many, many. it's less theoretical than "a lot". you can't say: a lot, a lot, a lot. it's morning as i write this, irish drizzle blown in by the wind against my window, thin droplets like static and i wonder: could i isolate thirty thousand? count up to thirty thousand little drops of rain against glass and imagine what that would look like as people. that's a small stadium, isn't it? and, it's also almost how many people have clicked on castles, in the past three years. it's also how many people, in my head, are telling me to just suck it up and write the next chapter. it's been a month already, hasn't it?

to tell you the truth, i still overshare with some people. there's a very small discord i'm on which is more like a group chat with my best internet friends. it's a lot of fun. and, i'm not going to tag them here for fear that you might come at them with pitchforks, but after i was explaining this to them, how exhausted and drained and lost i've been feeling lately, i had some, last week, tell me i should just give up castles. just stop, recharge, take care of myself. it's just a fic, it doesn't matter. let it go, you know?

so, yeah. you read that right, anon dearest. people who i really love, and trust, told me i should put your beloved on an indefinite hiatus and move on with my life. how's that for an update? and, they didn't say it in a "this is a bad fic and it's not worth continuing" kind of way, but in a "it's not worth working yourself into the ground" kind of way. in a "fanfiction is a hobby" kind of way.

i typically count years from september to august (i'm still in school, in my head, sue me) and this past one has been long and hard. for reasons that i won't explain because of the "very many" issue i mentioned above. for reasons that i also won't explain because as i also mentioned above, i can't help but always compare myself to people who have it worse. but, the fact of the matter is that whilst i'm not really asking for sympathy, i do want to say this, as i hope it will help provide a bit of context to how i'm feeling right now, in terms of writing.

anon dearest, i'm exhausted. i'm bored. i'm turning thirty in 24 days. i'm sick and tired of putting everything in my life on hold "until i finish castles". i would estimate that right now (and for the past three years) castles has eaten up about 75% of my free time. i think the first couple years, i didn't really mind. because it was the pandemic. because there wasn't much else i wanted to do. but now, when i see my friends, i try to schedule it on weekday evenings because i want to keep my weekends for writing. when i travel at the weekends, take holidays, do anything that will take me more than a couple hours, it's a compromise made against writing time. a compromise i often feel guilty about because it delays the next update and because ultimately, it delays the moment when i do finish castles. when i am able to move on to something else. move on with my life and also maybe another story of my own.

these past few months, i wrote almost every day from late march until last week because i knew i'd be going home to france in august and wouldn't be able to write there, so i needed to get ahead. everything in my life is planned around writing and updating and i'm a little bit burnt out, anon. it's typical summer me, nothing to really worry about, i felt the same last year (those who were already here will remember) but it doesn't make it suck less. and, that's why people are telling me to give up. because i keep getting stuck in this cycle of overworking myself, getting burnt out, taking a month off and diving back in again. it's fanfiction and it's a hobby and it's meant to be fun and it's just not fun anymore. it feels endless and draining and like a vampire eating my "good" years. time my mates are spending getting married and having children. and, even if i don't think that's what i want for myself, precisely, i still don't feel like the life i'm currently living is one i want to be living in five years' time.

i don't want to be exhausted. i don't want to be working all the time. this groundhog day of getting up, opening up my (work, or personal) laptop, deliveroo-ing my meals, working until 9:30 pm, and repeat. i have seven chapters left to go to the end, which will take 12 to 18 months, and i don't think i can go on like this for another year. i don't want to. something's gotta give: my IRL life, my job, or this "hobby", and it is logical (oh-so-logical) that it should be the latter.

and, yet. when my pocket friends suggested this, i came at them with pitchforks. i said: no. no, no, no, no. i can't give up. i don't want to give up. i love this story. it's unnerving and draining and exhausting, but haven't touched it for a week and i already miss it - it's crazy. and, it's true: it's not fun, but writing, to me, has never been "fun". it's: fulfilling, exhilarating, meaningful, it gives me the chills and a sense of peace but it's not "fun". i don't know who the fuck writes for "fun". you can enjoy things that aren't "fun", you know? i definitely do.

and, if i had to pick one thing to give up on that list, honestly, it would be my job - 100%. i'd finish castles in six months, if i could give that up. but, i can't, lovely anon. because fanfic doesn't pay. because writing doesn't pay. and whilst i do have a savings account that i intend to use someday to take time off to write, i don't think i could justify using it for anything other than original fiction. because at least, there would be a tiny bit of hope that the book might get picked up and i could make my money back. i can't, like, quit my job to write fanfiction, can i? even if i did set up a patreon, i doubt you all would want to fund me, lol.

so, i don't know. i don't know what to do, anon. i don't want to give up castles. realistically, i probably won't. realistically, i'm probably going to keep ploughing through and overworking myself and feeling like i'm throwing my youth and my free time away into this project that everyone will most likely forget the moment it is finished. right now, to answer your question, i have about 6,000 words on the new chapter. right now, i'm also taking august off writing. to recharge, to sleep, and only write if i feel like it. later? i don't know. i think i'm in a place where i've just got 30,000 words out in three months and i'm too brain-dead to think clearly. i am acutely aware that this issue doesn't have a solution (or at least one that i like) but i might be more willing to compromise my life again after a bit of rest and holidays.

anyway, sorry for being a debbie downer, anon. and sorry i don't have an update for you. i'm dying for one, too.

[therealcocoshady]

Please post chapter 35

Heyyyy ❤️. I’m sorry to disappoint but I have been giving it some thought and I think I’m not going to update Recovery anymore. Here is a picture of Marshall looking fine AF, in hope it makes the news easier to digest.

Ok, let’s not be dramatic, I’m just kidding 👀. BUT I’m not going to post Chapter 35. Not yet. Because… well because I have about 500 words so far. I’ve been going back and forth, trying to find ideas and the right words and it’s been a little challenging. That and the fact that I’ve been writing more HCs and one shots lately (and having a LOT of fun with it, might I add). ❤️

Also, life has been crazy lately, with mostly bad news, too, so I had to take a little step back as well. Around me, everything is full of stress, anxiety & grief and I’d rather take longer to write chapters than put out stuff I won’t be too happy with down the line 🤔. I Hope you understand ❤️.

I’d like to add that I’m usually not really gatekeeping my chapters. As soon as one is ready to be uploaded, I post it ☺️. HOPEFULLY (not promising anything) you guys will have Chapter 35 by the end of the week ❤️.

[trickstarbrave]

heyyyy im making a pinned post as that is a feature and seems good to keep info all in one place esp for ppl on mobile

❤️im brave!! or rua works if u want to but brave is by far the most popular name i go by. he/him pronouns

❤️art commissions/art trades are NOT on the table rn sadly. i used to offer commissions and did art trades with friends but for the most part im really busy with work/health conditions. if i have a bit of free time i may change this or make a few exceptions on a case by case basis depending on my schedule. for the most part tho i just want my art to be a stress relief activity

❤️art requests i do take from time to time now, but there is no guaranty i will take it. please do not spam requests hoping i’ll do it and please do not get mad if i don’t do it. they’re requests for a reason. if i am particularly inspired i’ll be happy to get around to it if life lets me

❤️technically multifandom blog i would say, mostly i have been focused on the elder scrolls series lately. you will probably see me rb stuff from like, a bunch of series. if this changes i’ll prob edit this post LMAO (i do not control the special interest)

❤️not just an art blog but also personal. my art can be found in my #my art tag. wips can sometimes be found scattered on my twitter if they arent on here. and writing that i publish can be found on my ao3 (though i have like a million wips that dont get published and be warned much of my ao3 is rated E and not for everyone)

❤️ been doing a lot of oc posting so i can do a run down of them currently for anyone that wants to follow along/know the lore:

/// OCS ///

(under cut)

🌟 Eyja: skyrim oc, nord dragonborn, she/her. past life incarnation was konahrik, alduin’s head priest, murdered by miraak. uses a bow and magic primarily. story can be found here

🌟 Senna: skyrim oc, nord dragonborn, she/her. proud two handed weapon user and leader of the companions. fought and lost to the world eater who took her back to his den and make her his partner. proof prophecy can be a complicated thing. story can be found here.

🌟 Baldur: skyrim oc, nord dragonborn, he/him. grew up on the streets stealing to survive, and certified trans of gender. fought and lost to the world eater who decided to force baldur to be his champion. helps him take over skyrim. story not yet published but will prob contain a lot of mentions of transphobia as a cw :(

🌟 Ansa: skyrim oc, nord dragonborn, she/her. orphaned at a young age, and just a weird, feral child. learned to steal, and ended up joining the thieves guild. killed mercer and turned the guild over to karliah and is helping rebuild it when she finds a weird rock that turns out to be a dragon egg. story not yet published

🌟 Ahkrinaak: general elder scrolls oc, he/him/any pronouns. he is based off me as a sort of self insert/persona character purely for comedy, not a serious au. dragon/god who was corrupted in the war with lorkhan/shor and became more so an agent of lorkhan. he spends most of his time pretending to be a mortal and causing problems. he’s just sillay. looks like a falmer/snow elf and nord hybrid making pretty much everyone just in general uncomfortable. dragons dont have gender he just likes tits. divorced with alduin

🌟 Lyre: not a skyrim oc (yet) but my beloved dnd character i have made a million aus for, including one that has turned into a full on novel lmao. will update everyone when i start uploading the novel (its not gonna be too serious just a fun lil webnovel that is pg rate) and you can see me post illustrations for. depending on the AU uses either he/him or she/her. i just think theyre neat

🌟 Anthial: nerevarine bosmer, tired, angry, nb spellsword. he/them pronouns. just wants to cover their entire body until you cant tell what gender they are. vivec never got them the drink he owed them. was convinced as nerevar that voryn never liked them back all that much. had an open marriage with almalexia. this incarnation was emotionless and lacked a moral compass due to the betrayal in their past life.

🌟 Steren: nerevarine, technically. not actually the reincarnation of nerevar, but the reincarnation of nerevar’s son. nerevar never reincarnated bc he was too busy haunting his descendants, too upset to move on. steren has a couple of aus but mostly its him with vivienne the dragonborn who belongs to @mulberrycafe. calls voryn “ata” and nerevar “dad” because he technically grew up in cyrodiil but remembers his first lifetime in bits and pieces where voryn raised him for the first few years.

feel free to send asks abt my ocs i love answering them

[anewp0tat0]

hey so who are your favourite characters in black butler? like a top ten or something

heyyyy thanks for asking! sure, always nice to cover the basics. ofc this will probably not be surprising to anyone who's heard me rant for a while now, but I'll explain it anyway.

top 3 first:

1. Ciel: an atrocious guy with very little social personality, and one of the best written protagonists I've personally read. I'm just really into digging through this guy's brain, and when he isn't destroying people he's doing things that end up being funny.

2. Sebastian: another well written protagonist, despite the fact that we know absolutely nothing about him other than the fact that his personality is "cats, I'm better than everyone, except for agni maybe". I remember in my first year in the fandom a friend and I had a like 2 hour long text conversation about how much we hated and loved Sebastian. terrible guy, couldn't have the series without him, leaves a lot to think about.

3. Grelle: she's just as if not more atrocious than the last 2 cause she made these awful decisions herself, but that doesn't stop me from respecting her work ethic and just thinking she's awesome in general. and aside from how cool she looks, I think her inner thoughts and relationships with her coworkers is so curious, there is a lot to explore here. compelling character for me.

and following:

4. Elizabeth: she's one of the purest characters out there and she is so complex. a good amount of people hate her or just find her annoying for whatever reason, but I think the trend here is that the more flawed the character is the better. she's trying so hard to please everyone. probably one of the most relatable characters in her own way.

5. Soma: the source of joy in my life, God I wish he was my friend. he and Agni are basically equal in my ranking, I think they're just the kid mentor duo, but unfortunately only one of them has the chance to keep developing... ;;;^;;;

6. Agni: "agni" was good every day of his life until the end. the only thing he did wrong was out of loyalty for Soma, Sebastian should be jealous of him cause he is all the butler that Sebastian will never be. plus he just cries sometimes and I respect that.

7. Ronald: this is such a fun guy, and yet I am capable of having long conversations about him and everything that he could have possibly been through, it has been done. his workplace dynamic is perfect. everyone needs a Ron.

8. Finny: another pure being, he's such an interesting and honestly rare character, I don't often see other people like him in media, so obviously he's interesting. he's one of the only characters in kuro who have deep trauma and yet doesn't act negatively on it, either because he's unable to comprehend it at length or because his love and positivity for all things is just stronger. also he's Ciel's big bro fr.

9. Meyrin: she's awesome, Hollywood and feminists alike wish they were able to write a strong female character like her😏 she's freakishly powerful and one of the most feminine people out there, and she deserves that after what she's been through. I will never stop supporting her, she's everyone's big sis and she's adorable.

10. Bard: proud dad to all the servants, he's the wacky beer uncle that we all wish we had. he's conservative but just give him some time cause he does care about people and what makes them happy.

hope this satisfies you and doesn't completely contradict your own list of favorites! have a good day

[ablatheringblatherskite]

inspired by @chaoticstupiddm, @therulerofallpotatos, and @beri-allen

Weyler Week is 6 days away, so I shall also try to do my part in hyping it up!

So obviously I decided I'd join very late (I also discovered it late so), so naturally I have finished none of the fics for it. But oh well!! It's still fun to do!! For my hype post I'll share my (possibly temporary) first sentences for each fic! (I don't have titles for them yet LOL forgive me)

Day 1's prompts is a mixture of dancing in the kitchen, college au, and poison!

“Heyyyy Bestie!”

Wednesday let out a sigh, rolling her eyes as she turned her computer chair away from her desk to face her roommate. “What do you want, Enid?”

Enid grinned at her, her eyes glinting mischievously. “So Ajax and I were thinking of sneaking to the kitchen tonight—”

“Perfect,” Wednesday interrupted, turning back around. “I'll finally be able to sleep in peace.”

Enid sighed in fond exasperation, coming to her side. “Actually,” she said, smirking at her. “I was hoping you'd join us.”

Wednesday glared up at her through her bangs. “No.”

ALSO FEATURES: Petroclair, Tyler loving baking, Wednesday being bad at feelings, shy Tyler, and Ajax and Tyler being friends

Day 2's prompts is a mixture of movie night and nightmares!

Wednesday didn't often watch movies, but Tyler enjoyed it, so she often found herself being dragged to movie nights with him, one way or another. But that didn't mean that she always let him pick what they'd watch.

ALSO FEATURES: Tyler being jumpy, someone getting sick, Wednesday's hand being in Tyler's hair, and Donovan being exhausted by them both (but being affectionate about it in his own way)

The prompt I picked for Day 3 is Holiday Decorations!

Wednesday wasn't sure how she got into this situation, but she knew it was Tyler's fault.

ALSO FEATURES: Tyler torturing Wednesday for once, Petroclair, Tyler baking again, and mistletoe

For Day 4, the prompt I decided to do was writer/barista AU! (I don't think I'm doing this exactly right lol but yeah)

Wednesday took her writing very seriously, going as far as to research whatever info she needed in person. She refused to be that type of author who didn't bother making simple things accurate. So when one of her characters had to go undercover as a barista, she knew she'd need to do some research to be sure she got all the details accurate.

ALSO FEATURES: Accidental (?) hand brushing, lots of spilled drinks and burnt fingers, and maybe some little affectionate running the other person's hand under cool water :>>

For Day 5 I got two different fic ideas based on two different prompts, but the one I'm gonna work on first I think will be Possessive Behavior!

Wednesday had finally accepted Tyler as her boyfriend, but apparently being her boyfriend came with very interesting side effects. Particularly, from Hyde.

ALSO FEATURES: Tyler trying desperately to not act like a crazy person while Hyde literally couldn't care less, jealous Hyde, and Wednesday just wanting to finish her homework

For Day 6, the prompt I decided to do was black dahlias!

There was a single black dahlia lying in the corner of the buffet table of the cafeteria.

ALSO FEATURES: Tyler being such a dorky romantic, Wednesday actually liking it, a boat, grenades, and fairy lights

For Day 7, I decided to do a mixture of hurt/comfort, memories and hands! (yes this might be a kind of painful fic)

Tyler's hands were covered in blood again.

ALSO FEATURES: Wednesday patching Tyler up, sad Tyler, and both of them finding comfort in each other (and maybe Donovan coming in to tell them there's food in the fridge)

And for Day 8, I decided to use a fic that I started a few days before I decided to join Weyler Week, currently titled Love Dust!

Tyler looked up from whatever he was preparing the moment Wednesday stepped in, his signature dopey grin plastered on his face as she sat at her usual booth.

“You're early,” Tyler observed, stepping out from behind the counter and leaning against it.

“I have a package that I need to pick up,” Wednesday responded.

Tyler furrowed his eyebrows. “Here? Hate to break it to you, Wednesday, but this isn't the post office.” Wednesday gave him a look. “They wouldn't deliver it to Nevermore directly, and the nearest post office is almost an hour away, so this was my only option.”

Tyler hummed. “Alright. Should I be… concerned about the contents of this package?”

Wednesday looked at him, her eyes glinting darkly enough that Tyler became concerned. Then she sighed. “Unfortunately not.”

ALSO FEATURES: Donovan losing years of his life because of these two, jealous Xavier, shipper Enid, Thing also being a shipper, and a lot of wholesome physical touch

And that is all :DDDD I really doubt I'll be able to post all these in time LOL but hopefully they'll be done before July 31 at the very least!!!! Weyler Week let's go!!!!

[mikomikono]

hi miko! im here with a fic writing question… i was thinking about how to make smut good bc recently i feel like whenever i get to the smut part of the fic im writing i get super bored, like im just rehashing whatever ive been writing in every smut scene ive done for years. you and endles came to mind bc i always find your guys nsfw scenes really compelling, and great, and unique. while also being hot and fun (very important w smut!!) so i wanted to ask if you had any tips for keeping things exciting or fresh when you are tackling those scenes! especially because you guys have experience writing the same characters many times over and manage to be so creative and distinct with every scene ive read from you. so, i guess, penny for your thoughts, if you feel like it! (sorry for sending this only to you and asking for both your opinions, it was the simplest 😭. if u want to answer yourself only thats fine haha)

❤️

Heyyyy oh my god I never expected to become someone ppl would come to for writing advice, what an honour 💖 also, I hope you don't mind me answering publicly, bc I feel like this is something a lit of writers struggle with! I will put it under a cut tho, bc I ended up writing quite a bit oops

So. Smut. It's kinda funny you should ask me about that, bc the first proper sex scene I ever wrote was last year for Steamship Sexcapades (bc I am not counting that one feeble attempt at 19 that was so cringe that I hid it away and didn't even think about trying again for like 8 yrs) but I suppose after writing *checks The Canon word count* a lot since then means something :DD

Here's the thing: I also feel like I'm rehashing things. Constantly. There's only so many ways you can say "cock in hole ➡️ thrust" before you're gonna have to repeat some phrases. And honestly, I feel like I repeat phrases remarkably often! But in a way that's all writing! (or that's how I stop myself from getting too depressed about it lol) The readers don't notice! Usually. And as long as you don't use the exact same wording every single time.

Ok, so here's a few tips on what I, personally, think you need to make a good sex scene:

Don't be afraid of the words. Y'know, the first time I wrote "half-hard cock" I (allegedly) had to take a 10min break and texted a friend that I was not going to be able to do this. But after a while you sort of get used to it and the words that seemed embarrassing stop being that, and become just... Words. And you also shouldn't shy away from more "cringe" words! Sometimes its fun to be a little cringe!

Related, you should try to love the words. But that's just good general writing advice, I feel.

Describe the emotions. Most people feel... something towards those they are intimate with, and that should be true in erotica too. It should be especially true in erotica, I think! Even if it's a one night stand, strangers who met in the club 5mins ago, whatever... You want the characters to feel.

Don't forget the physical. This is a thing that might seem a bit... weird. Like, you're writing sex, how could it not be physical? But what I mean is that you shouldn't forget to describe how it feels to the people involved, most notably your POV character. It's very easy to get lost in describing what they're doing and completely forget to get into the actual feeling. You're not writing a sex manual! And I have read fics where half way through I realise that's what it sounds like.

It's never just about the sex. Even if you think it is, it's not. It's about the connection, the narrative, the characterisation... It's about showing something that you can only show through the kind of vulnerable intimacy that sex scenes provide. Even if it's a oneshot pwp, it still has something to say. Maybe that something is wanting to get your rocks off, but also we're talking about fanfiction... We don't read and write that just to get off. It's always about the characters.

Rehashing is fine, actually. As I said, there's only so many ways to describe certain things, and so many ways you can have sex. Except that's not really true, because the secret to keeping it fresh is mixing it up! You can change positions, you can change who's the top/bottom, you can add foreplay (you should) and then change what kind of foreplay you wanna have! You can look into kinks! You can change locations! (I know we've done that a lot) You can add or remove any number of things to make each individual encounter different! And that's the key: repetition is fine, so long as you don't use the exact same everything every time. Case in point, there is a tumblr post which I would link except I'm on mobile, that is titled sth like "list of vocal sounds for smut", which has a list of, well, sounds/verbs (moan, groan, hiss, whimper, whisper etc) and adjectives that could be paired with them (hoarse, needy, quiet, throaty, desperate, wanton etc). The point is, that the best way to keep from sounding repetitive is to mix and match the words so that even if you say "groan" five times in 5k words, it's a different kind of groan every time. The same applies to sex acts! Do you have any idea how much cock Ryunosuke has sucked during The Canon? A lot. But it doesn't feel repetitive (hopefully) because everything else around it is switched up.

And perhaps most importantly: you gotta be at least a little horny for it yourself. I get it, man, writing smut is weird. You sit in front of your computer, staring at the monitor like "hmm is it better to use the word cock or dick or member?" And like... That's not very sexy. But! But!!! At the end of the day you gotta write something that makes you excited! Otherwise what's the point? Why are you writing if it doesn't fulfill you on some level??

Anyway, that's just my thoughts on the matter. If you want more specific help with writing, you can always DM me, I don't mind~

Also, endles says she is too mentally exhausted to properly answer, but she seconds everything I said, especially the point about loving the words. Actually she really wants to say sth about that, so I'm paraphrasing her for the rest of this:

You, as a writer, should love language. You should love the neat little things that language can do and seek out new things to try every time. It's a journey of discovery! Just like sex is always a new journey, even if it's the same characters and the same sex acts, every individual time is a chance to find something new. Let yourself have fun! Write something really stupid and work from that. The way I create scenes by writing jokes, even for serious scenes, because sex at the core is kinda funny. You're standing naked (at least partially) in front of this other naked person and it makes you feel a bit funny.

Also concrete advice: pick a list of 5-10 words you want to use. They can be anything, verbs, nouns, adjectives, as long as you really, really vibe with them, because they make you happy, as long as they're not words you already use a lot. They can also all relate to the same theme if you want! And then find a way to put all those words in.

[itsjaywalkers]

Heyyyy! It's ranter anon again!

I PASSED MY EXAMS! I got the results today and I'm just so happy, because they are fucking good!

Sooooo... it's time for my rants again! But i don't want to talk about exams or Jegulus... I want Bartylily!

At first I was like: "There are people who ship it?! Okay, weird..." and then... and then I thought about it and thought about it and thought about it.... and then I thought even MORE about it! And now I totally get it! It's just so sad that there aren't much fanfics about it, which is also the reason why I'm just more excited about "academic weapon" (no pressure)!

Anyways, I hope you have/had a great day!

Much love! <3

hello angel!! always so lovely to see u around <333

OMG CONGRATS DARLING!! I KNEW YOU WERE GONNA DO GREAT!! so so so happy for u <3 now u get to rest and enjoy summer like u deserve

AAAAAAAA BARTYLILY i always get so ridiculously excited when ppl ask me about them or i manage to get someone into it.. they're just so fun and their dynamic is Fascinating . to me

to be fair i never thought it was weird, per se, but it did shock me at first like . wow i've never thought of these two together in my life but my friend (saints) swayed me quite quickly lmao. i didn't need a lot of convincing and now they're one of my fav ships to write/read about

I KNOW !! WE DEFINITELY NEED MORE FICS !! and i also i need more time to read the ones i haven't read yet.. hopefully next month since i'm gonna be on holiday for a couple of weeks!!

anyways i'm so very excited about academic weapon too and i'm so glad u are too!! i'm enjoying the writing process immensely even tho the story has been waiting away from me.. it'll be posted at the end of this month and i can't wait

i also hope u have/had an amazing day!! sending u kisses and all my love MWAHHHH <333

[bustyasianbeautiespod]

Heyyyy this is genesis creation story anon- ty fr giving me permission to ramble more about biblical stuff haha this is definitely an area I don’t have as much knowledge of and its very complicated so take this with a decent grain of salt (also this will be long sorry) but basically: The second coming is part of xtian eschatology where Jesus comes back for the final judgement and establishes his kingdom. The details of this have changed a lot over time and between subsets of xtianity. (1/7)

In the gospels jesus talks about how the Son of Man will soon come and bad things will happen to the wicked, and the righteous will be a part of Gds kingdom on earth (with JC as king). Xtians generally see the SoM stuff as jesus talking about himself in 3rd person. The implication from the gospels and paul’s letters is all this was expected to happen very soon- jesus is quoted as saying ‘this generation will not pass away’ before the SoM comes and paul expected it to happen in his lifetime. (2/7 Later writings like the gospel of john arent as big on the immediacy of this. The book of revelation gets into this in much greater detail, using 1st century Jewish apocalyptic imagery which is pretty wild to read, and describes Jesus doing some pretty horrific things to the ppl he doesn’t like and establishing Gd’s kingdom on earth. (3/7) At some point in the 1800s someone decided something from one of pauls letters meant that the good ppl would get raptured up into heaven and so be spared from some or all of the terrible things happening on earth. Those who had already died would be resurrected and join in on the being raptured thing. (4/7) Certain sections of xtianity today have very specific theologies wrt when the rapture, the tribulation (7yrs of horrible things happening on earth) and the millennium (1000yr reign of JC) will happen compared to each other. I think most ppl go for the rapture-> trib -> millenium timeline. (5/7) Theres also different opinions on whether or not ppl can get saved during the tribulation or if youre screwed if you haven’t already given yourself to christ by that point it all gets messy and very specific. also wrt Metatron being human- one of the books of enoch has enoch become Metatron after Gd takes him! very fun idea I love it (6/7) (Also side bar that revelation is written in 1st century israel about 1st century israel the beast/whore/666/616 stuff is all about rome and nero ppl need to stop getting excited about awful things happening in the world and saying it means JC is coming back its weird and shitty) (7/7)

OMG GENESIS ANON HIII CHEERING AND CLAPPING! hope that our words did not pressure you into answering and that this was in fact fun for you to talk about bc i had fun reading! this is all very cool (though i am sorry ppl are misreading revelation Like That) and i wonder which elements will be incorporated into s3... that deleted scene in the show / the existing scene in the book where aziraphale says there won't be any rapture and humanity won't be part of armageddon at all still exists, but the second coming will be a different flavor and the metatron claims he wants someone with earth expertise to lead it... also hell yeah enoch lore that is a neat idea. tysm again!

- Crystal :)

[aria-ashryver]

heyoooo it's ur friendly local biohazard, just having a quick health check in under the cut!

(don't listen to my lies when i say "quick", it's never quick haha)

look at me being all worried about being late to see my doctor when he's away on vacation anyway and I had to chat with a different oncologist lol

So! I haven't really done any ✨Kicking Caesar's Kneecaps✨ chats in a while, so this is me just checking in!

So far my chemo journey has gone

3 months of weekly chemotherapy and hormone antibody treatments

1 month off (bc of peripheral neuropathy damage)

restarting the chemo regime at a 25% lower dose, with the expectation that I'll be needing an additional 3 months (today would mark one month since I restarted!)

BUT HEYYYY guess who has two thumbs that don't work anymore and an increased sensitivity to peripheral neuropathy!!!

(dark humour is dark?)

ok, it's not quite that bad yet. Yet being the operative word unfortunately.

For those who don't know, chemotherapy can effect the peripheral nerves in your body -- for some people, this means damage to nerves in the hands/feet/wrists/arms that can sometimes be permanent.

Not everyone gets nerve damage, and some get it worse than others.

I just so happen to be one of those lucky chumps with sensitive nerves!! While the month long break from chemo certainly helped reduce the intensity, the nerve damage in my hands is definitely spreading again.

What was initially just a bit of numbness/tingliness in the tip of my right thumb has since progressed into;

constant numbness/tingling sensations in my right thumb down to the heel of my thumb

static sensations across both palms and all of my fingers (which fortunately comes and goes)

occasional shooting nerve pain up my right arm, all the way from palm to armpit

extreme nerve sensitivity when I bend both of my wrists

tendon pain in both hands if i overexert myself

which is all kinds of not fun! And also goes a ways to explain why it's so damn hard for me to write at the moment! lol.

The doctors have therefore made a decision to pause my chemo for another two weeks, which is good in the sense that they are hopeful the break will halt some of the progressing nerve damage, but also lowkey infuriating because I would really like to get off this goddamn ride, you know?

Depending on how things go, my treatment plan might need to be changed again, so that I am getting less chemotherapy every week over a long period of weeks

which, like... 😑🙃🙃🙃🙃

...i just wanna be done with this, you know??

in happier news, all the other symptoms are calming down a little bit -- I haven't needed any anti-nausea meds in a few weeks, I'm not getting as many nosebleeds, the muscle pain and spasms seem to have stopped, I'm a little less fatigued -- there's still a whole host of shit going wrong, don't get me wrong, chemo still absolutely SUCKS ASS, but I'm really grateful that I've been able to get a decent nights sleep for the first time in months this past week 🥰💖

I also needed to get some urgent scans last week (I had some weird symptoms I'd never seen before and they were worried about potential fluid retention in my heart -- heart damage is the other big-concerning-possibly-permanent-damage thing chemo can bring about), but as it turns out, my body was just being a little bitch and my heart scans look good!!

i guess the tl;dr of this whole thing is just chemo blows and my hands are broken, but my heart isn't which is great, my sprit isn't, which is also great, and overall I'm feeling a hell of a lot better this week, despite being annoyed at the fact that I might have to do chemo for longer than i expected

here, have a sign I happened across on my walk to get a blood test yesterday. fitting, no?

if you are here reading this, i'm wishing you light and joy and love 🌻

[bellewintersroe]

Hiiii! :) I saw that your ships were open and thought I would request one if you're still doing them 💕

I'm 5'4", and have olive skin and dark hair (although my hair type is a weird combo of straight/wavy, and tends to have auburn undertones in the sun). I'm a Slytherin and INTP-T, if those mean anything lol.

Currently, I'm a student, and I'm very close to finishing my degree in History. No clue what I want to do with it once I'm done, but my dream career would be to write children's books. (Which is kind of ironic because I have that ADHD/Dyslexia combo going on, so you wouldn't really expect me to want to write - although I do have a very active imagination and constantly daydream about things) I hate the cold, but I'm always looking for outdoor adventures and activities like hiking.

Personality wise, I'm pretty introverted and observant, and a lot of people mistake my shyness for me being rude, even if I don't mean to come across that way. However, I'm at that point in my life where I really don't mind how people view me anymore, so I kind of just do what I want and vibe without worry anymore. I also am in the habit of just jumping into my car and driving off on little adventures by myself whenever I want a change of scene, which has given me a lot of fun experiences and taught me a lot about myself

Thank you love 💕 Hope you have an awesome day!!

Heyyyy thank you for your request, I’m a hugeee fan of your writing omg!!! hope you have a great day too!!<;3<3

I ship you with… Eugene Roe!!!

Ahhhhhh omg first of all Eugene finds you so attractive he’s a little scared?!

I feel like it’s your hair that he first notices? Like let’s say you have it tied back if you’ve just run Currahee or something, and when you take it down he sees all these auburn undertones.

it’s like a scene out of a movie, his eyebrows raise and he goes all doe eyed watching you as if you were the only person in the whole of camp Toccoa.

soon snaps out of this trance when Sobel starts barking orders lol.

but no seriously your features would really compliment his, and the first time he sees you up close ohhhh my god he’s in love???

he’s down bad for you even in the early days. So when you two start to speak to one another it only gets worse.

Like him, you’re a little shy and more observant, maybe at first Eugene does find this intimidating, but recognising you’re a little introverted yourself he’s the one to make the first move and speak to you?

once you get closer and he gets more on your vibe and how you’re so happy with where you are in life let’s say? He finds it truly inspiring.

like how can he find somebody so attractive and yet soooo kind and lovely and intuitive- like I said he’s down bad.

I feel like you’d make the first move? Idk he’s just so respectful and brought up to be so polite he was worried he’d disrespect you in any kinda way?

but nooooo honestly once you show one sign of interest it makes him the happiest man ever??

I feel like he’d be a super good kisser omfg-

I feel like you sound so open minded as a person and Eugene would love this. Maybe he needs somebody adventurous like you to bring him out of his shell?

his friends would deffo love you for this- I feel like they’d catch you both joy riding or something? They’d find it hilarious that Eugene Roe and you had stolen an army issued jeep.

but like I said you being so open minded and imaginative I feel like would give you such a fun relationship? Eugene would learn a thing or two from you and after a while I think he’d get in the swing of taking you out on more imaginative dates.

Eugene would be a massive fan of anything you wrote, seriously you’d never fail to impress him.

if anybody even attempted to question your writing abilities he’d immediately scowl omg.

Idc what anybody says for the people he loves he’d cuss somebody out to protect you.

Would be sooo reassuring and supportive afterwards? Literally would be your number 1 hype man.

if you got upset by anybody’s doubts he’d be sooo gentle and patient and caring with you omg.

Would deffo pull you into his lap and watch you through sad eyes. This man is soo gentle ONG help.

i think because you’re so observant Gene would want to get your opinion on a lot of things. People, situations, even his outfits?

Would probably prioritise you over anything omg.

I think he’s a dark horse in the bedroom lmao???? Like BDE but we can discuss that another time-

Maybe if either of you were struggling to sleep or if you’d have a particular bad day, Eugene knows how much you like driving so you’d just go on mini road trips together?

driving through the night with his hand on your lap would deffo happen and it would be perfect omg.

Let’s say you’re both somehow in Bastogne together, okay.

You’d been together for a couple months or so at this point and Eugene knows how much you hate the cold. He’d hate to see you sit there suffering and shuddering away without the correct uniform or supplies.

god he despised whoever put you in this hell of a place.

So he’d steal you blankets, wrapping you up and force feeding you coffee whether you liked it or not? He’s so so worried for you out there and Bastogne clearly had a toll on his mental health.

If it wasn’t for you and your comfort he wouldn’t have known how he coped? You’re such a cathartic relief for him, he almost feels a little dependent on you after Bastogne.

just give him lots of hugs and reassurance and he’ll appreciate this for a life time.

takes you home with him to be with his family where they treat you as one of their own 🥺🥺🥰🥰

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I ship you platonically with… Bill Guarnere!!

Okay forget coming across rude just because you’re shy cos Guarnere wouldn’t think this for a second.

in fact he’d get confused straight away if anybody else thought this? He’d maybe get a little defensive too because he knows what type of person you are.

I mean, he did think you were more introverted at first, but when he saw you randomly joy riding an army issued keep???? He was in shock- but the best kind.

he let out a HUGE belly laugh omg- he almost got you caught. But deciding he wanted to jump in with you.

takes the piss out of your driving- apparently he’s much better but he’s the one that crashes?

maybe you two get in a lil trouble together from the superiors but Bill always takes the blame.

like no she was alone and needed a lift, she doesn’t even know what the hell joy riding is?

if you go on some adventure somewhere or a hike Bill would seem pretty keen to join but would probably complain the whole way?

I feel like he’d get on your nerves like a brother would ? Like don’t complain at me if you’re just gonna come on 5 more hikes with me the week after?

he’s a drama queen, so your calmer energy chills him out.

wouldn’t know what the hell you were talking about on the topic of history but thinks you’re a human encyclopaedia?

deffo gives you this nickname.

teases you about Eugene and once tried to give you a chat about the ‘birds and the bee’s’ like thanks Bill I’m not 12?!

[mrs-weasley-reid]

Hey Ker! How are you doing?

I'm in love with your writing. I love the way you structure it. It's really cool. My fav are Suit Jacket and BAU'S psychiatrist one. You make them seem effortless. How did you manage to write like this?

Heyyyy, I'm exhausted but all in all good🫶 I hope you're well and drank water today!

And STAWPP you're making me blush I swear!!!! Thank you so so much, it means a lot! Also I agree, one of my best works are Suit Jacket and the two part psychiatrist!reader fic. I really had a lot of fun writing it and I think that's the most important thing when you write, you gotta have fun!

If I'm being honest though, that structure of writing is the most well-thought and intricate fics I've ever written. So if you thought the date and time stamp are random, think again👀 I love LOVE timelines in writing. It feels like I have a better idea of the story whenever I know what year, date, time a certain scenario is brought to life.

In terms of how I manage to write, I'll be honest, I have no idea. It's a hit or miss whenever I write. Either it's good or it's whatever. Cause for me it's easy to imagine a scenario, but the storyline leading up to it is a lot harder for me to create. I have so many unfinished drafts because of it.