#hey what the tongue do?
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Arcane au where everything is the same except Silco has to lick his eyeball like a lizard bc he literally doesn’t have an eyelid
#silco#arcane silco#silco fanart#silco arcane#arcane memes#arcane#arcane league of legends#hey what the tongue do?#lick his eyeballs that’s what it do#how is he not tearing up constantly imagine not being able to blink id die#myart
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"Since the Netherbrain fell, you and Astarion have seen more of Faerûn than you ever thought possible. One night, he tells you that these last six months of happy memories are the counterweight to two hundred years of misery."
idk what's up with my obsession with drawing astarion being happy and cared for but I'm sure it's not gonna come up in therapy. AFFECTION BEAM!!!!
#baldur's gate 3#bg3#bg3 fanart#bg3 tav#bg3 astarion#astarion ancunin#astarion x tav#tav x astarion#zyrastarion#bloodsong#dinosaur laser art#can you tell I'm getting bolder with posting my shit on tumblr#hey welcome to my tags where I have a mental breakdown#I'm unwell about this character. severely#and I'll make it everyone else's problem thank you good night#listen I just think we should allow astarion to be goofy.#postgame astarion is a good old fashioned lover boy (tm)#spawnstarion my BELOVED I would do unspeakable things to you#what's the maximum amount of tags I can add to this#I don't care if this is ooc I don't CARE he's my silly rabbit#I'm 28 years old and I've lost control of my life#I'm on my second run and I tried so hard not to romance him#I was having a genuinely miserable time LMAO dear lord#I gave up and romanced him anyways it's fine we're all fine#in all seriousness drawing this kind of stuff is therapeutic#he's a comfort character to me due to shared trauma etc#and I find comfort in seeing him in mundane situations#but like. happy and thriving and free. as he should be#larian studios meet me in the pit you've ruined my life#EDIT: I forgot tieflings have a forked tongue please kill me
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One thing I really enjoy about transition is when the changes in hormones slow down...
It feels like I am a house settling, shifting ever-so-slightly, and becoming one with this new foundation.
I don't have a "typical" body, but so do the other guys in my family. I look like them now. I've been told I looked like my father when he was a teenager, and I feel as though I am in the mentality I need to be in.
So many people are excited when they get all these new changes all at once, and then they might become disappointed when their second puberty starts to slow down, but I find I am the opposite. I am so much more at peace than I was before, and that's saying something when I was at peace a month into my changes.
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#i feel like my experiences are 'atypical' but like... my family is kinda that way#like the guys in my family have the same-ish body type i do so i haven't always been dysphoric about it#i was mostly dysphoric about the fact i don't and can't fit into the 'typical male' archetype#but like... my dad doesn't fit into that at all and nobody gives him shit for it so hey what do i have to contend with#i'm getting close to the three-year mark and from my observations that tends to be where your changes do still happen...#...but it isn't always as quick/intense as it once was. your body tends to settle down y'know? that's where i feel i'm at#like i'd appreciate more body hair on my stomach and my mustache kurtis but that could take a bit and that's okay#it takes years for a cis man with testosterone YEARS for his hair to mature sometimes#and tbh i think we should celebrate that. you are a fine wine; you will only become fuller and richer as time goes on#you'll mature into a full-bodied wine that lingers on your tongue and leaves you craving more#alright i'm done with the wine metaphor because i only know so little about wine and alcohol 👍
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Thinking about the structure of the Old Religion.
From what we know there's the Nine which refers to the High Priestesses of the Triple Goddess - powerful sorcerers who obtained immortality (unless killed by some form of magic), and performed important rituals of the Old Religion.
It is unknown if there was a High Priest equivalent, but Gaius in S1Ep13 does tell Merlin that "the High Priests have the power to mirror life and death". This suggests that perhaps there were High Priests of the Triple Goddess, and that they also had a Nine.
There's the Bendrui, women who failed to become part of the Nine. Just like those who eventually became High Priestesses of the Triple Goddess, they were chosen at birth for the priesthood - taken from their families and raised as initiates of the Old Religion. Despite their failure, Bendrui are practiced in potent magic, and appear to have above average gifts.
There's the Bloodguard, warrior priests who swore to protect the High Priestesses. They, like the High Priestesses, were the only people to ever set eyes upon the staff carved from the Rowan tree that grows at the very heart of the Isle of the Blessed.
It could be suggested that like the Bendrui, the Bloodguard could have been failed High Priests, but there is no evidence (other than the existence of the Bendrui, and the mention of High Priests) to truly suggest this.
It is also unknown if the Bloodguard served the Triple Goddess. It is possible that the priests served various different gods of the Old Religion, but due to their relation to the Nine specifically, it is likely these warrior priests served the Triple Goddess.
There's the Catha, which contains priests. (Alator is referred to being "of the Catha, warrior and priest", he also says "I'm a Catha priest").
It is unknown if they served the Triple Goddess, or a different god of the Old Religion (and we know they are priests of the Old Religion because Morgana says, "He's a Catha...priest of the Old Religion.").
They have their own language, however, suggesting that they are a unique culture, and perhaps even an ethnic group. (This is further supported by Alator saying Catha are trained from birth to master all physical pain, it is also said that they guard their ancient knowledge - which leans towards them being a people rather than just initiates of the Old Religion)
There's the Disir, the highest court of the Old Religion, made up of three women chosen at birth to be trained as seers and soothsayers. They are the mouthpiece of the Triple Goddess, and interpret her word. As Gaius says, "When they sat in judgement, their word was final". They pass on the runemark, which is both judgement and fate - it contains a person's guilt, as well as the path the gods have chosen for them.
There's the Druids, a peaceful people who worship the Old Religion and often possess magic. It's a part of their beliefs to help people in need of care, and therefore, those who weren't born a Druid can find a home amongst them (Morgana is one such example).
Moreover, the Druids look for children with the gift of telepathy to serve as apprentices (perhaps to keep them safe? perhaps to encourage their magic in childhood?). The Druids also have a tattoo of a triskelion somewhere on their body, perhaps as a part of a ritual (to indicate someone has become a Druid?).
While the Druids have an intimate knowledge of prophecy and destiny, especially regarding Emrys and the Once and Future King, they do not appear to be priests or priestesses in any form. Just like the Catha, they have their own language (called the Druid tongue and Druidic Runes by Gaius), therefore, it is possible that they too are a unique culture and/or an ethnic group.
There's the Isle of the Blessed, a sacred location of the Old Religion, said to be the centre of it, and the focus of its power - it is also where the power of the ancients can still be felt after the Great Purge. Artifacts such as the Rowan staff, the Cup of Life, and the Horn of Cathbhadh were kept there under the care of the High Priestesses. Furthermore, Morgana's healing bracelet was forged on Isle - suggesting that its power allowed for the creation of powerful artifacts (this is further supported by the Rowan staff which was carved from the tree that grows there).
In a deleted scene for S4Ep1, Morgause says when she was first brought to the Isle, the hallways were teeming with women - High Priestesses. Although it is said often within the fandom, canon never establishes if the initiates were trained on the Isle. This deleted scene, however, heavily suggests it.
There's the Caerlanrigh, a sacred spring within the Grove of Brineved. There, the Disir reside within a cave, where the spring feeds into an ancient pool - in which the Disir divine from. The old ways are at their strongest there, and it's at the very centre of their powers (whether Gaius meant the old ways or the Disir here is unclear).
There's the Cauldron of Arianrhod, a sacred site of the Old Religion. The lake contains the power of the White Goddess, who can be summoned to heal those affected by the Teine Diaga ritual. However, if such a person is tricked into entering the cauldron, their soul would be lost forever.
There's the Crystal Cave, said to be the birthplace of magic. It is filled to the brim with scrying crystals that show the past, present, and future. Taliesin used the cave as the source of his prophecies for the kings of old. And as much as the crystals can be controlled, they can force visions upon powerful sorcerers too.
The cave can also hold spirits within it, seen with both Balinor and Taliesin.
While this may have been the case for Merlin alone, the cave can restore a person's magic.
There are celebrations important to the Old Religion too, such as:
Samhain, a time of year where the people feel closest to the spirits of their ancestors, in which they celebrate their passing.
During Samhain it was traditional for the High Priestesses to gather on the Isle of the Blessed and perform a blood sacrifice to release the Dorocha. This was done on the stroke of midnight, when the veil between the worlds is at its thinnest.
Since the Dorocha do not roam free in the world throughout the series, it is suggested that a second blood sacrifice was done by the High Priestesses - perhaps before the night was through - to close the veil once more.
In Camelot, a feast is held as part of the celebrations. (This suggests that while the Old Religion and its practices were abandoned during and after the Purge, the heart of the religion and its holidays were never replaced).
Beltane, a time of year where the High Priestesses would gather at the Great Stones of Nemeton and summon the spirits of their ancestors with the Horn of Cathbhadh. It opens the door to the Spirit World and allows the person who blew the horn to see and speak with their ancestor of choice.
In Camelot a feast is held as part of the celebrations (which much like Samhain seems indicate that the Old Religion has been around for so long that it cannot be removed from society entirely - that the people clung onto some traditions, including the royal family).
There's the Gods of the Old Religion, the Triple Goddess, the White Goddess, and Nemaine. It could be implied that the White Goddess, and the Earth Mother Nemaine are part of the Triple Goddess, but it is just as likely for them to be separate gods.
If so, the Triple Goddess is heavily associated with the Nine, destiny and fate, and the immortality of certain sorcerers. Perhaps she is also associated with the balance of the world, due to the power over life and death being tied to the High Priestesses and supposed High Priests.
The White Goddess, however, appears to be associated with one's soul and healing. It was only her power that could heal and retain Gwen's soul after Teine Diaga ritual.
The Earth Mother Nemaine is related to Gean Canach, as it is said her tears forged the creature. The book Gaius reads from has more information, and from what can be deciphered, it says that Nemaine first wept at the slaughter of war, resulting in the Gean Canach crawling out of the Earth's belly (there is more written on the page, but it is impossible to tell what it says). This suggests that Nemaine lives within the Earth's core, and that she is indeed associated with nature and living beings as her name implies.
Furthermore, since she wept at the slaughter of war, she is perhaps the god of life itself, but not of the entire cycle. And due to the Gean Canach's abilities, to devour and drain a sorcerer of their magic, it is likely that this war's slaughter was brought about by magic.
It is possible that The Earth Mother Nemaine could be related to the Pool of Nemhain. Despite having different spellings in the show (the subtitles), they have extremely similar pronunciations (even if it is a bit different). Perhaps they are unrelated, but if they are one and the same, it could be suggested that the Earth Mother is connected to death as well as life, due to the pool being the last of the Five Gateways to the Spirit World. (This contradicts what is analysed in the above paragraph, but this post is meant to speculate multiple possibilities.)
Honourable mentions:
It could be suggested that the Quest Ritual was once part of the Old Religion. It includes the heir to the throne of Camelot transcending their body in order to receive a vision of a quest. This quest is meant to prove their worth to the people, and their worthiness of the throne. The heir prepares themself by cleansing their body and dressing in white robes. They spend an entire night kneeling on the floor, barefoot, with their eyes closed.
Due to how Arthur reacts in the morning when Uther pulls him out of it, and how sacred the entire process appears to be, it is as if the heir is actually gifted with a vision of a quest. This is supported by his reaction, as he looks dazed when relays what he has seen. Therefore, it seems as if the ritual includes some form of magic due to the preparation, and if so, then it's likely it was a practice of the Old Religion (specifically for the heirs of Camelot? Due to Camelot's association with the very heart of magic?)
It has been around for hundreds of years, so it is not outside the realm of possibility that the Quest Ritual is so old that the general consensus has forgotten its ties to the Old Religion, or much like Samhain and Beltane, it is perhaps so baked into society that it couldn't be abandoned.
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In S1Ep13, Merlin says that the "Old Religion died out centuries ago". Even in Series 1 this is far from true, but later seasons make this remark seem entirely ignorant. If anything, this sentiment comes from a post-Purge society, where the structures of the Old Religion no longer exist. Perhaps it is even propaganda that Uther pushed forward as people became more fearful over the years, turning away from the old ways despite once practicing such beliefs (and for the people of Camelot, still practicing some of those beliefs).
It is possible this was a retcon but if so then it's directly retconned in S1Ep13 when it's revealed that Nimueh is a High Priestess.
Anyhow, in response to Merlin's ignorance, Kilgharrah says, "The Old Religion is the magic of the Earth itself. It is the essence which binds all things together. It will last long beyond the time of men".
This shows that the Old Religion doesn't just refer to the religion and the gods, but rather it is the very magic that makes up the fabric of the world, and as Balinor says in S2Ep13 it's either a part of you or it isn't. This suggests that it is indeed not just a religion, but the very world, the Earth, magic.
He also goes on to say that Merlin must "find those who still serve it", which shows that Uther very much didn't succeed in eradicating the structure of the Old Religion entirely, at least at that point in the show. And perhaps that anyone could serve it, even after the very structure collapsed.
All this is to say that the Old Religion is extremely pagan. The structure itself is vague perhaps because Old Religion is personal, it is vague. The differences between the High Priestesses, the Catha, and the Druids make this clear. Following the Old Religion's beliefs, traditions, and holidays is personal and spiritual because it varies, because there is no wrong way. Because there are no set rules or a real structure at all. The High Priestesses had power, yes, but this seems to come directly from the Triple Goddess herself, rather than a societal standing.
Nimueh was at court, and she was Uther's friend, but she was also very quickly thrown from the court after Ygraine died. And yes, the High Priestesses went to war with the Ancient Kings, but that appears to be a difference in factions, rather than let's say the Christian church and its power over the centuries.
Therefore, I propose that the Old Religion as a religion was loose in its structure, that it never died out like Merlin said (which does seem to be a post-Purge sentiment), but instead simply changed and evolved, and continued to exist even after the Purge, with its holidays in Camelot, and with the Druids and their practices/beliefs.
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Overall, the information we have on the structure of the Old Religion is vague and patchy. This was perhaps intentional so the writers could work around existing canon to introduce new concepts without being constricted by their past worldbuilding. But that's getting into the Intentional Fallacy, so I'll leave that there.
It appears that the High Priestesses had the most power in society, due to their past wars with the Ancient Kings, and their sheer power and knowledge. Not to mention their artifacts and control over creatures like the Fomorroh.
But there are different beliefs and structures to the Old Religion, like with the Catha and the Druids, suggesting that there are multiple ways to worship and follow the Old Religion.
The many sacred sites show that there are different powers and sources to the Old Religion that have different purposes. Like how the path to the Cauldron of Arianrhod was lined with banners for pilgrims, not to necessarily summon the White Goddess, but to visit the site. Or how the Isle of the Blessed is a powerful religious site, while the Crystal Cave is a fairly legendary and unknown place that few ever get to see.
In conclusion, the Old Religion is vast and has many facets to it. There is some structure, but it doesn't seem entirely necessary in order to follow the Old Religion. And in reality, it is inherent to the Earth, it is magic itself.
#bbc merlin#merlin#i think that about covers everything and has about all i wanna analyse and speculate on :)#this is really a summary that will be helpful to me and probably only to me i expect this will get no notes :P#i love the old religion i really think it's cool and i like how there's gaps we can fill in with fanfic but it's always important to look#back at canon and understand what's actually there what the story says about it#and yeah I wrote this entire post because i was pondering something for my fic - mainly how much Camelot is tied#to the Old Religion which it really seems to be? like everything centres around it the heart the birthplace and such#and maybe there's that kinda thing in other kingdoms but I don't know if that's true given the Isle of the Blessed and hell even Avalon#i didnt include Avalon and Sidhe here because that doesn't quite apply to the human interpretation of the Old Religion#there's only one distinct thing i could say about it and that's the fact that Avalon is only seen by mortals when they're#about to die which links it to death and perhaps the Spirit World but it still appears to separate and more to do with the#Sidhe which seem to exist outside the conventions of the Old Religion we often see in the show - given that their#spell language is different (Old Irish as opposed to Old English much like how the Dragonlord tongue is Greek)#and like Avalon is not related to the structure of humans - and if I included it I'd have to include the dragons and such and that is#out of the scope of this post and it's already long enough so hey ho here have these tags :P#this is a 2.9k post including tags haha XD hope you have the setting on for long posts because im not putting this under a cut
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anyone else losing sleep over the fact that Cyrano spoke abt willingly sacrificing the chance of ever being happy someday, as long as he knew it would ensure the happiness of someone he loves, to both Roxane & Christian separately — & then had it ripped from him anyway before he was able to make that sacrifice, without ensuring a thing? yeah me neither
#Cyrano de Bergerac#quotations#theatre#French#langue et langage#analyses#characters#hey guess what. the word 'bonheur' comes up 5 times in this play. this is 4 of them#(the other one was Cyrano saying 'le bonheur est là !' right before he was abt to confess to Roxane at Arras.#his Happily Ever After was on his tongue then. he could taste it. & lost it for good in mere moments)#anyway I just think it's wild that it's almost exclusively Cyrano who uses this word in the whole play#& almost exclusively in the context of the death of his happiness. not like...being happy#ofc the boys in act IV aren't outright saying 'I would sacrifice my chance at happiness for you' the way Cyrano did to Roxane#but also...they basically are? 'how do you expect me to go on knowing I caused you to sacrifice your chance at happiness?'#OR RATHER '...knowing that you sacrificed your happiness for me?'#god. an OT3 would've saved so much of this tragedy#but none of these pretty heartfelt words mattered in the end anyway! it didn't matter whom Cyrano was going to sacrifice his happiness for!#bc it was ripped from him 😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊#sorry king too slow use it or lose it#although I suppose he was sacrificing it for both of them by the end#he became rlly concerned w the idea that Christian know Roxane loves him#as much as he was concerned w keeping Roxane as happy as she could be in widowhood by keeping her husband's memory radiant#(even though all her rosiest memories of Christian were of Cyrano. as she told Christian at Arras much to his consternation)#((that whole weeping dialogue as she is dragged from Arras praising Christian. praising Cyrano.#& Cyrano is forced to accept the adoration the compliments the fact that she sees him in this light. & yet never claim it))#(((*ugly sobbing intensifies*)))
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could i bother u for more thoughts on faith and max in a mock apple orchard 🥺👉🏻👈🏻
@gayafsatan — I would absolutely LOVE to brainstorm some fun ideas of them in a mock apple orchard!!
I've been replaying again so they've been rotating around in my mind a lot extra hard and was especially thinking about mock apple picking bc the botanical labs also has a lil orchard where you can pick mock apples up off the ground! But I'm currently in Roseway so oughhh.. ideas....
I want you now I am going to ramble a LOT so please bear with me I swearsies it'll be more fun if we get the full lore dump from my brain 😩💖💕
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👇 ROSEWAY THOUGHTS 👇
(I AM GOING TO TALK ABT ROSEWAY THOUGHTS AS A WHOLE AND THEN EASE INTO SOME SILLY MOCK APPLE ORCHARD IDEAS AT THE END OKAY. OKAY ILY THANK YOU).
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My thoughts are very chaotic and rambly so let me try to walk though my ideas lmao
Roseway is typically where I peg Faith's death wish arc happening, and to summarize what all that entails, it's when the mask slips and the weight of everything finally hits her in full force.
I always envision this story happening over a long period of time so a lot of time has passed since first arriving at Edgewater and the Groundbreaker.
Halcyon. Her situation. Her identity. The life Phineas threw her into abruptly and his expectations for her. Making split second moral decisions where no matter what someone is going to get hurt. Being so alien and alone, no one to understand her or believe in her predicament but having to be the mysterious competent captain regardless.
It finally gets to her. Bad. And she makes some self destructive decisions. She gets sloppy, careless, hoping someone else will end this nightmare for her. Until they almost do.
I am swiftly brushing past many details so we don't get too lost in the sauce. But Max went after her, found her collapsed and injured bad, carried her back to the ship for Ellie to do whatever she could, and then stayed by her side for as long as it took for her to wake up.
This is such a key moment for them getting closer. Because there was a lot of frustration and emotion and being forced to confront the possibility of feelings existing, but nothing they fully understand or are ready to acknowledge as such yet.
She tries to brush past the subject of what happened, deflecting everything until he raises his voice in a way he hasn't since she gave him the journal and she threatened he never talk like that to her again. And it was enough to break through her facade, for her to show just how utterly broken and vulnerable she is, and they have a proper fucking conversation about where she's at mentally. He still isn't ready for the truth about her life before. But it's a step forward.
There is a lot of patience and understanding and just. Yeah. A lot happens here. Some walls come down. There grows some room for them to become softer and closer over more time.
All of this is important because a short piece I had written a long time ago took place in this area roughly after this incident.
It was a personal outlet vent piece, I will be honest. When I wrote it it was after I had a very bad panic attack after an awful scare. And I wrote it into Faith because I just wanted to get some feelings from that experience out of my system.
The shortened version of that one is Faith recovering from a bad episode, trying to calm her breathing, waiting for her ears to stop ringing and for her vision to come back. Her legs gave out on her and she was sitting under the mock apple trees. Her voice locks up on her when she's seriously distressed. Yadda yadda yadda, Max had brought along his datapad so she could communicate anything important and she was incredibly confused because she knows he doesn't like using his datapad ever and then rendered even more speechless to know he brought it specifically for her in case something like this were to happen again. It ends with her just asking if he would keep talking to her, and they sit there under the mock apple trees for a while, in no particular rush to get anywhere.
And after this point, I think the mock apple orchards become a really peaceful, therapeutic spot for her when she just wants a moment to herself. Sits there, breathes, takes in the Roseway scenery and collects herself before jumping back into the horrors of Halcyon. Spends some time picking mock apples to take back to the ship.
I've been having a lot of ideas of her asking Max to go with her. I'm of the mind if she'd ask directly that he'd either decline, or at least pretend to be uninterested but she's the one who asked so he accepts the offer.
But I can see her being vague and just saying that she's heading out if he'd join her and she leads him to the orchards. By this point they're already often in each other's company, she indulges his interests often, letting him be the one who is finally listened to. But in general, they get along very well in conversation when it comes to a handful of similar interests and their personalities and attitudes bounce off of each other well.
(In my story anyway, since she spends an extended amount of time in Edgewater and the Vale, there was also a lot of time spent doing some early bonding with Max. So do with that info what you will. They're not likeee besties yet but they're much more than strangers by this point, ya'know? Just to get an idea of where their familiarity with each other is at and why there's enough respect and trust to some extent already existing. Not to mention how much time they had spent on the Groundbreaker).
They'd be having such a peaceful time away from the rest of the crew.
Oughhh hear me out, okay, Faith loves to bake. She doesn't even ask, she just makes Max hold her bag open while she starts collecting mock apples and after they finally head back to the ship she figures out how to make mock apple pie for the crew 😭 we already know Max doesn't care much for sweets (I wonder how sweet or tart a mock apple pie would be.. Faith girl what all Halcyon ingredients are you adding to that bad boy) but.. what if.... After everyone goes to bed...... He tries some anyway........ Because she made it..........
Most of what's bouncing around in my brain is them early on having wholesome bonding time in a spot just for the two of them. Just enjoying each other's company. Realizing they have genuine respect for each other, Faith feeling like she found a genuine friend who went to lengths further than anyone had in her entire life to make sure she survived. I am specifying Faith's feelings here intentionally. I write Max in a more complicated spot very blinded by his revenge scheme more or less unaware for a long while just how much the lines start blurring between his faith and his Faith. To put it succinctly. (Look I know I'm always drawing The Good Stuff™️ but in actuality their relationship is suchhhh a slow burn. They are not the most romantically inclined people lmao).
But also.. once she realizes she can talk to him when she needs to. I think coming back to this spot, off the ship, away from the crew, she just likes it there. She likes being there with him. She finds comfort in that spot.
OKAY BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE WOULD BE CUTE.... they should come back here.. post-scylla and post-gorgon...... Ya'know......... The first being when they establish not wanting to be apart and the second being when they want to make that partnership a permanent one......... ASKING HER IN THE MOCK APPLE ORCHARDS WOULDN'T THAT BE DARLING ough okay I need a minute my brain is going too fast to comprehend
My Roseway ideas aren't the most cleaned up I know BUT so many important bonding moments exist and oughhhh LOOSE IDEAS ARE STILL WORTH TALKING ABOUT OKAYYYYY
I just want them to go mock apple picking together and learn how to get smiles out of each other and not understand why it makes their chests hurt but they know they need to do it again
ACTUALLYYYYY post-scylla when he's much more mellowed out and they're the closest they've been I think would be so so nice. they'd be so much softer and he'd probably be so much more involved in wanting to enjoy silly lil activities with her.....
Currently imagining him reading out loud to her, all the conversations they'd have, maybe he brings his tossball cards to show her, maybe they bring one of the lil games, have a lil makeshift picnic....
Godddd the transition between just how much enthusiasm he shows spending time with her is enough to make me explode. Can you see my vision. The reluctance, to the hesitancy, to becoming absolutely inseparable.
I HAVE A LOT TO THINK ABOUT BUT I'M GETTING SLEEPY SO SENDING IT!!!!!!
Literally feel free to add on or share your own thoughts I'm begging you lmao I promise there is so much room for ideas to be fleshed out and better put together, I'm mostly just spitballing what all I think would be incredibly fun ideas to work with. Plus I'm kind of thinking across the timeline and how much their relationship would change between each visit. And how over time they would enjoy it more and more and make each visit more special than the last.
WAIT BEFORE I LOSE THE THOUGHT!! They make a stop RIGHT BEFORE HEADING TO SCYLLA TO GO TO THE HERMIT'S LODGE!! Oh that could hurt so good omgggg. Okay okay I need to stop now I NEED TO STOP.
#MY DEAR FRIEND I WROTE SO MUCH I APOLOGIZE AHEAD OF TIME#I had a LOT of roseway thoughts I needed to get out of my system#that lead into why the mock apple orchards would be such a special spot they'd want to keep returning to 😭#my thoughts are all a mess tho I know I know I have a lot that's needs cleaning up and better fleshed out#but hey! what's the point of having ideas if you can't talk about them no matter what stage of development they're at!!#enjoy my long winded roseway ramble#I really do think the orchards would make such a lovely spot to just be alone and bond#not that it was ever their intention. it certainly wasn't supposed to happen he'd think.#yet there he is. unable to deny her invitation and realizing all too late how many details about her he has committed to memory#always so collected and calculated. never stumbling on his words. always knowing just what to say.#until it comes to her. until she days his name. until her voice like a siren song has his tongue tied in knots.#'vicar max if you prefer brevity' he tells her. yet maximillian she'll call him. letting his name linger on her lips for as long as possible#I think I need to go lay down#faith and max#my writing#long post#says*
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every single papercut comment my mother makes, i will pray that she stubs her toe 🙏
#borbtalks#'oh ew what's that black mark? on ur ear? right next to ur jewelry? *uncomfortably close as she stares at it*'#like fuck OFF. it's a PIMPLE you FUCKWIT. it's currently SCABBED bc you've spent over 20 YEARS picking at all my acne while i walk by#and now i pick at my acne and what happens when u pick at acne? it BLEEDS. FUCK YOU#woman is incapable of shutting up she NEEDS to comment on EVERYTHING. 'oh u look so bloated!'#'u have this massive pimple. right where i can see it' 'borb ur hair looks so greasy' 'theres just something (pimple) right here...'#'borb do u ever brush ur tongue? wdym dr says its thrush. well i say it's gross !! now open wide so i can stare and gag at it'#'do u think uve gained weight? well ive noticed 😰...' 'hey how are your bowel movements? not that im timing u in the bathroom or anything'#grrrr i hope she STUBS HER TOES. ALL OF THEM.
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I'm ment 43 but oh well.
I'll answer both!
The obvious answer would be Rick Allen even tho he's not typically one that you'd call sexy. But he's sexy to me and that's all that matters.
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ugh i have a friend who is super into astrology and it's like "mercury is in retrograde this is so terrible!!!" like bro even if planets could affect your life on earth mercury isn't doing shit it's just how it looks in the sky is going backwards because of orbital dynamics it is literally not doing anything different at all it's just vibing
#i mean i have Many problems with astrology including of course the basic core of the idea is nonsense#but like#it's not fucking doing anything#it's just because of how the earth is passing around it#we're passing by mercury in a certain way hey by the way can you look at the sky and point out mercury to me right now?#like do you actually even know where it is in the sky?#ugh i bite my tongue and scroll past while repeating to myself that as long as they aren't hurting anyone#- and they are not hurting anyone -#it's none of my goddamned business what they believe#and so i keep scrolling but i always want to be just like#HOW DO YOU THINK ORBITAL MECHANICS OF PLANETS MILLIONS OF MILES AWAY FROM US#HAVE ANY FUCKING THING TO DO WITH YOUR MOOD AND THE RANDOM INTERPERSONAL SHIT IN YOUR LIFE#WHY DO YOU THINK THE OTHER SEVEN PLANETS GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOU#WHY DO YOU THINK THE CONSTELLATIONS CARE#THEY FUCKING CHANGE OVER TIME JFC THE TILT OF THE EARTH CHANGES MEANING THAT FUCKING POLARIS#HAS NOT ALWAYS BEEN THE NORTH STAR AND WILL NOT BE AGAIN LIKE. ???????#how arrogant?#to believe that the random alignment of the stars in the vast cosmos has anything to do with you#and how helpless?#to believe that the random alignment of the stars in the vast cosmos dictates what happens to you?#the planets orbit the sun babe and so do we#they're not here for us and they don't have jack shit to do with us#it's all chaos babe#embrace it and accept it because it means that the only thing that matters in your life is what you do with it#the distant planets and stars don't have control over you#you do#it's all chaos and that's very freeing#let go of the need to be influenced#let go of the need to find order#and make it yourself instead
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Anytime someone out of the loop reblogs any boy king au art, I always just wanna put a huge asterisk like "THIS IS PART OF A PREEXISTING AU, A VETTONSO AU, PLEASE ASK ME ABOUT IT 🙏" cause most people are very surprised to learn how much of a narrative there is sjfklf
#yes he is boy king seb but he is a very specific boy king 🥰#why did i name this au boy king as if hes not emperor#doesnt roll off the tongue as easily ig ;;;#its fine tho bcs hes always boy king in my heart but like. do be aware.#im on a unimaginable level of rpf#like not only is it f1 rpf but it is also ultra specific historical rpf lmfao#BUT HEY IM GLAD YOU GUYS LIKED THE NEW ART#I LIKE IT A LOT IM VERY PROUD OF IT#it was so terrible last night tho cause i really wanted to finish it#but i drank coffee that i THOUGHT was fully decaf#and i had it with ice cream(i am lactose intolerant)#so yeah i was able to finish the art but i also laid in bed in pain at like 5 am#but the show must go on! boy king gets what boy king wants!#as cofi said to me. he truly is the golden child 🥹 i always put the most deranged energy into painting him#ah man tho im sad to have finished this project in just a 3 day span. it was a lot of fun#i think next ill have to draw silly ship chibis of seb harassing nando w the sceptre and orb etc etc#catie.rambling.txt
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this week feels like its been 5 years and jesus fucking christ
#im about to. i dint know what im about to do but my god. do i feel like doing something#i hate college now ive decided. dont take so many writing only classes haha. ha. ha.#i hate papers. i nevrr finished the lne i was supposed to do last night.#i feel useless and stupid#i just wanna [slides finger over throat and clicks tongue] ya know.#real bad#every day i get increasingly more likely to panic text my mom hey mom cant do this anymore love you or some shit#i dont! it would end bad! very bad! but good lord.#i think im supposed to say something if my new meds make me feel more inclined to gi through the motions instead of ideation but#i cant keep figuring out meds. so im just gonna wait until it settles in my system alright? :)
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when i wake up after a meltdown im like ok im going to be nice to myself today and then i end up being just as mean to myself in my head as i always am except i’ll also maybe let myself go to bed like an hour earlier as a treat
#i guess saying im going to go easy on myself doesnt mean youre going easy on yourself maybe#everyone is like be nice to yourself after an episode. and im like what does taht actually mean#how do you be nice to yourself#do you just call yourself a good boy in your head every time you manage to stop yourself from jumping out the window#but then like even typing this im like girl get a fucking grip everyone cries until 4am and screams into their pillow#you dont need to fucking give yourself a spa day just because youre depressed get a fucking grip#but then im like i would never think that about someone else let alone say it to them so .#but then im like im different to everyone else i get different treatment because im fucking horrible#but then im like is any of this really that deep maybe i should just go back to bed i cannot be arsed keeping my eyes open anymore#i'll just have some irn bru and NOT beat myself up for doing a bad job with down then left#and then i'll try and stop doing a bad job with down then left and if it doesn't work i will Not spiral over it again#and then if im feeling crazy i will let myself sleep#if youre still reading these tags hey. thanks for reading all this. can i kiss you with tongue
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Speaking of the Advena Avis, it was jolly well good of Szilard to spare Nile, Denkurō Tōgō, and (*inhales, crosses fingers*) Zank Rowan like he did during that wee massacre of his. You know, the alchemists whom Majida Battuta sent in part because they were also fully qualified sailors who could pilot the ship? Those guys?
I expect that the trio did recruit and teach some of their fellow alchemists in the ways of seamanship because the more the better; just because the Advena Avis is a special ship that can be operated by far fewer people than a ship that size normally would require doesn’t mean it has to. Still... I do wonder how the ship and its immortal survivors would have faired without the Battuta Boys. Majida Men.
Y’think Ronny would have deigned to do the survivors a compensatory solid by ensuring fair weather and fish galore for the rest of the trip? I mean, he gives the mortals immortality, and what do they do? First thing one of them does is eat thirteen—whoop, sixteen, bye-bye Battuta Boys—there goes the most qualified if not only sailors on board. Szilard’s bad, but still. Oof.
Frankly, as much as the majority of passengers were nerds alchemists who could certainly busy themselves during the transatlantic journey with some paper and pen, some of them might even have welcomed learning the ship’s ropes and engaging in the physical busywork, despite how hard that work was, because...well, that would keep their minds off the massacre. Also, entertainment and activities were, I imagine, limited, since fleeing the city as fugitives probably didn’t leave much time for packing such possessions.
On the other hand, picturing the alchemists emerging from the catacombs to dash past the burning buildings toward the Advena Avis with instruments (musical and alchemical) on their backs, dice, chess pieces, and knucklebones in their pockets, and books in their rucksacks is somewhat compelling. Ah, imagination. The original entertainment.
Edit: What are the chances that resident noodle LFV would have pitched in to blend in vs. LFV worming his way out of helping every single time? Patching the ship with oakum? Can’t, sorry; it’s time for Czes’ bath. Painting the rails? Excuse me, but I must pen a wrought memoir lamenting Szilard’s wretched deeds. If only I were the writer that my dear friend Jean was...
#Baccano!#Baccano#Advena Avis#Advenna Avis#uh oh the ship's filled with nerds what do#'Nerds' used extremely tongue-in-cheek here. Thank you for your understanding.#As are 'uh oh' and 'what do'.#No I don't quite wholeheartedly believe Ronny might have done that because hey these blokes *are* immortal now...#....and one might suppose that the Ronny of 1711 is not yet the Ronny who does Maria solid by splitting the clouds in 1933.#Elmer throws himself into the ocean on purpose just to say 'hey demon it would make everyone smile if the weather is good k thnx'#You know... if I were the Descendant my curator's behind would be doing everything in my power to preserve and copy those memoirs.#*glances at uni education and curatorial resources*#It would be a shame if the laws of Baccano! fire demanded that those memoirs be consigned to arson.
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Struck by the Tumble and Etcetera are cousins agenda this evening.
#not by blood but they're cousins <3#Tumblebrutus#Etcetera#extemporize back chat#i get struck most effectively by like tiny coincidental relationships between cats in my hcs#tumble would only go along with asapargus to visit auntie jelly if he promised etcetera would be there#not because he doesnt like auntie jelly but because dad and her talk *forever* about boring stuff#and he gets so *bored* but at least if etcetera is there he can snatch her quietly from her basket and bring her outside to play#or she'll run out behind him when they come in and tackle him so he'll piggy back her out (he has no choice)#tumble isn't so good at the 'make sure she doesn't get into trouble' part#etcetera is very good at the 'hey! leave him alone! *reveals something extremely embarrassing about him#that inevitably makes it worse and he gets cross with her for involving herself but you know what actually#it's kinda nice she stood up for him but never do that again*'#'why are you dragging her along?' 'cause she's such a crybaby! 'i'm gonna tell! i'm gonna tell if you don't let me come!'#while etcetera sticks her tongue out at him#and when they're older they're keeping that good olde theatre cat generational tradition alive#because they're the ones left who...understand i suppose?#because they grew up fully under that influence#while jerrie and teazer were exposed to less of it#not for any other reason than they weren't super interested for the longest time#so tumble and cettie carry that quiet weight of mutual understanding
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Me as an aro/ace
#reading and writing romance is so 😍🥰#but honestly I have such a hard time believing it actually exists#like I’m sure you love your partner sooo much#but enough to put your tongue in their mouth??#I don’t think so#but also sometimes I feel like I’m missing out ✌️😎#hey Mr therapist#what do you call that?
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Temperate Lake Dashboard Simulator
🐦⬛2xcrested_cormorant Follow Going to try and eat this weird fish
♻️🐦⬛2xcrested_cormorant Follow wilmdlife hopital
🐸rana-bufo Follow No one can ever truly understand what BULL4rog's music means to me 😭 this song in particular argrgrgrgrgrg the way he puffs out his vocal sack asdfghjk
BULL4rog: listen here on spotify ♻️🐸rana-bufo Follow I think I huave chytrid
🐟ilikeeatingminnowsFollow I just migrated here from finstagram please be nice
🐠powerbottomfeeder Follow
I have HAD IT with this lake, it’s the third day in a row we’ve had nitrates above 8 ppm and uug the algae, my allergies I can’t do this
♻️🐟carpy-diem Follow
Lol we regularly get nitrates up to 20 ppm in my lake ♻️🦞crawdaddy Follow uhhh you shouldn't be bragging about that, it's really unsafe ♻️🐟carpy-diem Follow suck it you little oligotrophic bitch
🐢snappturt Follow Dear Tumblr, am I the Basshole for the way I catch minnows? I was chatting with some of the guys I bask with and they said the way I catch minnows is problematic; What I do is I sit on the bottom of the lake, I hide myself in the mud and I open my mouth. My tongue looks a lot like a little worm so I wiggle it around- and because of that, minnows swim over and check it out. Once they get close enough, then I bite down and eat them. Some of my rockmates have told me that this is manipulative and toxic behavior- but they also eat minnows...I don't know guys...
🦆tree hole-nester-acorn-eater Follow
is it just me, or is this super homoerotic???
🐟bigpikexxl Follow liveblogging diving down to the bottom
♻️🐟bigpikexxl Follow dark
♻️🐟bigpikexxl Follow big log
♻️🐟bigpikexxl Follow rock
♻️🐟bigpikexxl Follow kinda cold
♻️🐟bigpikexxl Follow oh hi @deepwatersculpin!!!
♻️🐠deepwatersculpin Follow oh hey @bigpikexxl!!!
never thought i'd seen one of my mutuals irl!!! I didn't even know we lived in the same lake!!!
🐠Shadlad Follow I'm not sorry, and I'm not afraid to say it, if you're an introduced species, go dry yourself out. You're not welcome to eat up all of our resources and live in my ancestral longs and rock crags. These things are for us to relate to and not for you to squander.
♻️🦞crevice-steve Follow
Can't believe this type of fishcourse is still popular on this site, introduced species didn't choose to be introduced and have as much of a right to live as anyone else. Bigotry against introduced species is still bigotry and that's a hill I will dry on. ♻️🐠Shadlad Follow Go ahead, dry yourself out then ;) ♻️🪷nootnootnewt Follow Hey man, I hate invasive species as much as anyone else but please stop telling people to beach themselves for political reasons- yeah that includes inavsives too ♻️🦐typical_scud Follow Did you legit just use the word Invas*ve to describe introduced species? ♻️🦢flatfootswimmer Follow anyone in this thread eat pondweed?
♻️🐟largemouthbASS Follow A colab with my mutual @2xcrested_cormorant after they got released from the wildlife hospital. They haven't been on much since the Fish and Wildlife Service released them in the wrong lake and it took them a while to get back to their colony. We hope this guide will help you avoid accidentally eating/engaging with bait!
#fishblr#fishposting#fake post#dashboard simulator#cw thalassophobia#thalassophobia#ecology#freshwater ecology#wood duck#walleye
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