#hes not even in events now he was MEANT to be in. there was a merch thing for a huge crossover thing between all the stpr co groups and he

[multifandomlover01]

His Person

Spencer Reid (S1, early stages of relationship) x chubby!fem!reader (I’m basing this off myself mostly)

WC: ~2.5k

Summary: Spencer reassures his girlfriend that she is the only one for him and that she's beautiful to him no matter what she's wearing

Warnings: body talk, insecurities about body (specifically a pudgy tummy) and relationship/worth/value, one (1) intrusive thought, concept of a safety dress that one feels comfortable in, a mention that reader might be comparing her body to the bodies of others, uh dresses? little rusty writing so early seasons Spencer may be a little OOC but he's a sweetie

-

You tugged at the dress that you wore. It didn’t fit right. That’s all you could see, all you could feel. It didn’t look right either. No amount of tugging would crease out the pudge that was your tummy. You sigh and start looking for your safety dress that you were sure would still fit fine (or at least it might be looser).

You didn’t even hear Spencer come into your bedroom. He already had his suit and tie on, looking as uncomfortable as you felt. His gaze flits over your body before refocusing on the back of your head.

Neither one of you was particularly excited about this FBI Gala but the presence of every member of the BAU was mandatory. And being Spencer’s girlfriend, naturally he’d asked you to be his date so he could at least have his comfort with him at this stuffy event.

He cleared his throat to announce his presence. “Looking for something…dear?” He was still trying out terms of endearment for you, determined to find a set of ones that felt right. Dear felt very formal and safe. He never imagined himself being able to call you "babygirl".

You sigh and look back at him. “This one dress.���

He furrowed his eyebrows, squinting for a second as his mind processes that information and his response. “What’s wrong with the one you have on?”

It was a simple question. So why did it make you wanna shrink? You pause for a long time. Too long, because he speaks up again.

“Have I said something wrong?” He had taken to asking this question when you paused for a long time. He knew you were probably just trying to articulate your thoughts but he very much was afraid of offending you. He wasn’t used to relationships. Professional relationships were difficult enough for him to navigate on some level so a personal, romantic relationship was still mostly uncharted territory where he’d rather not veer into choppy waters.

“No…I just…wanna try a different dress on.”

“That one’s fine.” He still doesn’t understand why you need another dress when you’d already put one on.

Fine. The word echoed in your mind. You knew he hadn’t meant it condescendingly. You knew he was being honest. And you loved him but you yearned for a moment when a man saw you in a dress and his brain just went “gorgeous”. Spencer, of course, hadn't gotten a good enough reign on the sails just yet to be there in the relationship. And you recognized this and loved his genuine awkward charm. But you still wished he wasn’t so…clinically honest sometimes. Because it didn't always hit as sweet.

“It’s just one other dress.”

He switches gears. “Can I help you look?”

“I swear it was in here.”

“If you just-”

If I were just thinner, I wouldn’t need my safety dress. Fuck off intrusive thought!

You huff louder than necessary (cutting Spencer off) and you stop searching.

“Is something wrong?” Spencer is getting more concerned now. He takes a step towards you. He was pleased that he could fairly easily switch to “my person’s sad, must fix” mode. He thought he’d blunder more when it came to that particular aspect of a romantic relationship.

You don’t answer right away. He assumes the answer is "yes" but has also learned not to say that he assumes that.

“Can you tell me if something is? Please?” His voice softens like it does sometimes and he looks at you with those stupid hazel puppy dog eyes.

You look at him and know instantly that he sincerely just wants to know what’s up with you. You’d already had a very deep conversation about honesty in the relationship so you know it doesn’t do either of you any good to maintain that you’re fine.

“I don’t want you to think I’m being…” you trail off.

“Hey, I won’t think you’re anything you’re afraid of, ok? I promise.”

“You don’t know what I’m gonna say.”

“You’re not "stupid". You’re not a "child". You’re not "too sensitive". I promise what you feel is valid. And I intend to treat it as such.”

You knew he was right. You knew he’d never make fun of you.

“I don’t like this dress on my body.” That was both harder and easier to say than you thought it would be.

He processes for a second. And then asks the simple question: “why not?” which has a simple answer…right?

Your first instinct is to say “because I look fat in it” but you stop yourself from saying that because you think you sound “like a complaining woman”. Your next thought is that Spencer’s first thought will not be: “Jesus, I don’t wanna hear anymore.”.

“I don’t like how my stomach looks.” You rephrase and clarify.

He looks down. That’s simply his first instinct. Your stomach looks like it’s looked like the entire time he’s known you (a year or so at this point). He doesn’t want to keep asking the same question over and over again. But he knows “you look fine” isn’t generally accepted by women as an answer so he knows that won’t fix the problem.

“What’s different about it?” He asks instead.

This gives you pause. “N-Nothing…” you’re forced to answer/admit.

“Does it not fit right? Does it feel too tight?” Your comfort. That’s what he’s concerned about. You were so afraid he’d just say “yeah? You’re fat.” even if he didn’t see it as a bad thing, that still might be triggering to hear. But his line of thinking is so far from that.

“It just…shows too much,”

“But it’s covering…” he pauses, knowing that line of thinking isn’t correct. “you don’t like how you look..” he reaches a hand out to almost touch your stomach but he stops short of it. “I still don’t understand what’s wrong with the dress.”

He hated unsolved mysteries (the mysteries themselves, he had nothing against Robert Stack personally) and he hated not having things figured out. He hated being confused but trying to navigate a relationship often left him feeling like he was up a creek without an oar.

You cup your stomach, hoping he’ll understand. He does not.

“That’s your stomach…”

“The dress is too small.” You try to clarify for him.

“Is it? Is it supposed to fit so…snuggly?”

“Who knows? I just know I’d feel better in my safety dress.”

“Safety dress?” He questions.

You freeze. You’d never told him about it.

“What’s that?” He asks, inquisitive as ever.

“It’s uh…a dress I look…and feel good in.”

“As opposed to…the dress you have on now?”

You avert your gaze and nod. He isn’t the type to grab chins and force people to look at them so he doesn’t do that.

“Sweetie? Can you look at me? Please?” He instead requested softly. Sweetie made sense because you were so sweet.

You meet his gaze and it’s as soft and warm as ever.

“If it’ll make you feel better, I’ll help you find your safety dress but I need you to know that you look beautiful as you are now.” He swapped fine with beautiful because he felt the emphasis was necessary.

“You’re just saying that.”

“No. I’m not. I could walk out that door right now with you and be happy to have you at my side. You don’t need to be wearing any particular dress. I don’t care about the dress, I care about the person wearing it.”

“Th-Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me. We both know we’d both rather be in comfortable clothes watching Star Trek tonight than going to this…Gala. I wouldn’t have asked you to suffer it with me but…I really want you there with me. It’s so many people and so much…pressure.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

“You’d be in fuzzy pj pants right now if it weren’t for me.”

“Hey, no. It’s not your fault.”

“I kind of feel like it is. I don’t want you to go if you’re just gonna be uncomfortable all night.”

He starts to search for the dress, very determined to help you be comfortable.

“Could you describe the dress to me?”

“I-It’s uh…black…short sleeves, it’s got a satin body with a ruffle on the end and lace details over that.”

He looks back at you quizzically. “That’s your safety dress?”

“It doesn’t look like what you’re imagining.” You joke lightly.

“How do you know what I’m imagining?”

“Some sexy little number?”

“Some…cute little number…” He clarifies.

“There! Don’t move your hand! That’s it!” You point.

Spencer pulls the dress out. It’s black. It’s got short sleeves. It’s got lace details all over and the “body” or main part under the lace is black satin or silk. It’s knee length.

“Do you feel more comfortable in this dress?” He asked as he passed it to you.

“We’ll see.” You struggle to unzip the dress you currently had on. “Help? Please?”

He puts the dress on the bed. He comes up behind you to unzip the dress. You shimmy out of the dress. It falls to pool around your ankles. You pop the safety dress over your head. 

You look at yourself in the mirror. You sigh. "No...it's too short...and it's not fancy enough..."

Spencer is just looking at you. He isn't saying anything. He's just admiring how you look in the dress.

"What do you think?" You ask Spencer as you run your hand over your stomach in the dress.

Spencer doesn't immediately respond. He's distracted by the skin that's showing.

"Spencer?"

"Hmm?" He meets your gaze.

"I asked you a question."

"Oh...sorry." He smiles, shaking his head. "What was your question?"

"Do you think this dress is appropriate for the Gala? Or should I find something longer?"

"Well I uh..." He trails off, not really knowing what is and wasn't Gala appropriate (he hadn't been informed and assumed you'd know so he hadn't asked).

"Oh! Wait! I know...I have this longer green dress..."

You look through your closet again to find it. Spencer distracts himself from checking you out while your back is turned.

"I found it!" You proclaim. "Size 10, ok...should be ok..."

"Size 10 is fine." Spencer hears himself say.

"Wish it were a 12."

"Hey...don't say that. Try it on. I bet you look just as pretty. Because...you always look pretty."

You smile before you change dresses. Spencer respectfully averts his gaze so he isn't checking you out in your underwear. But he looks back when you're situating the green dress out.

"Wow...definitely more...Gala. I especially like the um...outer layer? Is that what it's called?"

"I wouldn't kn-"

"Overlay!" He interrupts. "Sorry." He says sheepishly.

"That's a good word for it." You smile.

"It's really pretty. Y-You're...really pretty. The dress is pretty on you. You look pretty in the dress." He blushes slightly like he's embarrassed he seemingly couldn't settle on what to say, so he'd just said every variation he could think of (because it was all true).

"You really don't have to say all that, you know."

"Why not? Why can't I? Why shouldn't I?" He was genuinely curious as to why he couldn't compliment his girlfriend. That's what a boyfriend did, wasn't it?

"You can just say I look nice."

"But what if I feel more and I want to articulate that to you?" It was a simple question.

And it makes you pause, because you’d never before considered that he might want to wax poetic about your beauty.

"I'm not lying to you." He reassures.

"I-I know..." You nod.

"Do you?" He queries, but not in a condescending way. "Do you truly understand that I'm not just saying nice things to make you feel good? Do you comprehend that what I tell you is truly how I feel?"

"I guess I'm just not used to receiving compliments."

"Not used to receiving them or unwilling to accept the genuine ones as being genuine?" Because there was a distinction.

"Th-The latter, I guess." You say softly, averting your gaze to the floor.

"Can you look at me please?" He requests softly.

You look into his hazel eyes and see nothing but genuine admiration and affection for you.

"Do you believe that I love you?"

"Yes." You hesitate for only a second.

"That's good." He doesn’t mention the hesitation. “And would you believe me if I told you that I believe that you look beautiful in any dress you put on?”

“Yes. I believe that you believe that.”

“What do I have to do to make you believe that?” He asks softly, genuinely.

“I-I don’t know…”

He sighs. He steps closer to you. “You have looked beautiful in all three dresses I’ve seen you in.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me. Just be on my arm and look pretty.”

We share a look. That sounded weird coming out of his mouth to the both of us. We share a smile.

“Arm candy.” He muses. “That doesn’t do justice to all that you are to me.”

"It doesn't?"

"Not even close."

"What do I mean to you?"

"So much. I could have a million years and I still would not be able to find the words to describe how much you mean to me, or to describe what you mean to me."

"What am I to you?"

"I truly believe you are my person. I walk into a room you're already in and nothing else matters. All I see is you. And you are...beautiful to me. Does that help explain why it doesn't matter what dress you wear or no matter how many other women are around you, I only focus on you? No one compares to you. I enjoy your company. You enjoy mine. Being with you just...feels so easy and effortless. From the minute we met, you were just...easy. You're easy to talk to, easy to be around, easy to touch. I had never warmed so fast to a person. And you know what it was that hooked me?"

"What?" You manage to ask after being awestruck but his words.

"Not your body, well, nothing below your face. It was your eyes, your smile. So...kind and sweet..."

"Spencer..." You say softly, tears beginning to well up in your eyes.

"You're my person, my perfect puzzle piece."

You hug him and he hugs you right back, adoring the way your body fit against his. His arms wrap around you as he holds you to him, his chin tucking in on your shoulder.

"I love you." He whispers softly.

"I love you too." You say back.

"We should go. We're gonna be late." He goes to pull away from you.

"Can you hold me for just another minute? Please?"

"We can be late. Five minutes."

"Thank you."

He buries his face in your neck, smelling your hair.

"You smell like home."

[flowerofenigmas]

Maskless Mark x black male reader

An: Not a lot of black reader fics for Invincible, especially not male ones, so I thought I'd do it myself. The next post will most likely be either an Invincible X Tamaranean reader or a self-indulgent Genshin Self insert post. Or the secret THIRD option: an invincible self-insert post.

CW for major character death (reader), angst, and mild gore.

"Where's Mark, Y/N? You were supposed to drop him off an hour ago."

It was a simple question, one you could've answered easily. Amber and Mark had a bit of a falling out, you two talked for a bit after, and then he went to see Eve. An easy sequence of events to relay.

But the real question was if you wanted to.

You had never seen Omni-man so pissed, especially towards Mark. If you told him where Mark went, would he be safe afterward? You could do that to someone.

Especially not someone you love.

Omni-man's finger gripped the side of your car door, threatening to dent it. "Answer the question, Y/N. Where is Mark?" The words came more impatient and stern than the last, with the 'hero' leaning closer to you and maintaining firm eye contact. Your heart was beating so hard you swore it would just leap out. It raced faster when you noticed the blood on his fingers.

Even still, you couldn't betray Mark.

"He and Amber had a bit of a falling out...?" You murmured, voice small as you gently tugged on a loc. "And uh- he went to the mall to cool off and, um..."

Thunk.

There was now a hand shaped indent in the roof of your car. Omni-man knew you were lying, and his patience with you was near gone.

"One last chance, Y/N. Where. Is. Mark?"

You panicked.

Without a second thought, you slammed your foot down against the pedal and sped off. The roof of your car was now beyond repair and the side was now heavily scratched. You didn't care, though.

You didn't get far.

You were violently dragged out of your car, one side now cut from glass and metal and your neck held in a tight grip.

You were given a chance.

And you wasted it.

But at least it was on love.

The last thing you saw was Omni-man's fist pulling back to punch you.

Crunch.

The scene Mark had returned to was gruesome, to say the least.

Not much in the traditional sense, as it was one person, but to him, it was.

One person lay dead on the street, neck nearly twisted off and face caved in beyond recognition, but Mark knew who it was.

Brown skin. Long black locs. A Seance Dog hoodie that once belonged to him.

It was you.

"I know how much he meant to you, Mark, but you have to understand that our mission is much more important than the life of one person."

Mark didn't look back to his father; he didn't even acknowledge him. Right now, he was focused on you. The life you could've had. The gifts he had wanted to give you. Your plans to go 'hang out' later. He could've had everything with you, but it was taken from him.

You were dead, gone, and yet still he raised a hand to reach out to you.

Omni-man flew closer to Mark, placing a hand on his shoulder. "He was holding you back, son. With him around, you would've never helped me conquer Earth. He needed to go. If you're so distraught, then you can get another pet later. Right now, you need to-"

"You're right, Dad. I wouldn't have ever conquered Earth for Viltrum with him around." Mark interrupted as he finally stopped reaching out. "But after what you did? I don't want you here."

Mark finally turned back to face his father, eyes hollow and numb. "I can see the future, and you don't live to see tomorrow."

It was quiet.

He was finally quiet.

He was heartless, so Mark made sure that he fit that descriptor.

A giant hole in the chest of his 'father.'

He'd never have to listen to him again.

His mother had been killed not that long ago by his 'father.' His friend- no, not friend, you were more than that to him. His everything was killed by him, too. And now his 'father' was dead, leaving poor Mark alone.

He had gotten revenge. Revenge for his mother, revenge for you. But he didn't feel any better.

You were gone.

And he didn't feel any better.

Just empty.

Empty and angry.

Why did everyone else get to live so carefree while you had to die? It wasn't fair.

He'd make it fair.

Tell me if anything is off with the tags or if there are any spelling mistakes.

[cheshireliam]

"Once More, An Evil From Which You Can't Return" Story Event: Ring END

Roger Barel & Ring Schwartz

This is a fan-made translation solely for entertainment purposes with no guaranteed perfection; expect mistakes, grammatical errors, and some creative liberties. All original content and media used belongs to Cybird. Please support the game by buying their stories and playing their games. Reblogs appreciated.

Read this before interacting

⇦ Chapter 2

━━━━

Ring and I reenacted the first hug we supposedly had at this location. 

(His heart is racing… does this mean he truly has feelings for me, his lover?) 

I felt an affectionate swell in my heart at his gentleness when I realised his heartbeat quickened due to his emotions. 

He put his arms around me, but he hesitated to go all the way and stopped just before his hands touched my back. 

Kate: Are you conscious about people seeing us? 

Ring: No. It’s just that your scent is drifting around and distracting me. 

Once again, his words sounded nothing like what a lover would say. 

Kate: If that distracts you, how did we normally hug?

Ring: W-well… uhh… like this! 

All of a sudden, Ring pulled me into a tight embrace and squeezed me so hard my back arched—

(...—!)

In that instant, my vision blurred and turned white, even the sight of Ring’s face before me vanished. 

(... I remember now—)

(Ring and I aren’t lovers at all…!)

In fact, I never had a lover to begin with. 

Ring: Kate, you suddenly went silent. Don't tell me, did you recall something?

(Why did Ring lie about being my lover…?)

Kate: …

Ring: Kate? 

I stared intently at Ring’s facial expression, trying to grasp his true motive, but all I could see was an innocent and pure gaze. 

(I have no idea what Ring is thinking at all. What should I do…? Oh!)

Kate: Ring! I remember everything now. We really were lovers! 

I decided to pretend I believed his lie, to see how he would respond. 

Ring: W-wait a minute. You really remember? 

Kate: Yes, every single thing. 

Ring: … 

(He looks confused. Let’s give him another nudge.) 

Kate: It’s all thanks to you, Ring. Please let me thank you properly. 

Ring: You don’t have to. 

Kate: Don’t say that. We’re lovers, right? So there’s no need for you to hold back. 

Kate: Come on, let’s go somewhere I can properly express my gratitude.

Ring: H-hey— 

Ignoring his protests, I forcefully pushed his back and led him towards the main street where the street lamps had just been lit up. 

…

Kate: This is my favourite restaurant. I’ll give you a treat. 

Ring: No, you really don’t have to thank me.

Kate: Then take it as we’re celebrating me regaining my memories. Shall we head inside? 

While saying that, I purposely wrapped my arm around his and clung to him. 

I wanted to see how he would react if I acted like I was really his lover, even though we weren’t dating. 

Ring: F-fine, just don’t cling to me so much… 

Even after we were seated, Ring’s face was still slightly red. 

Kate: Can I order my recommendations? 

Ring: Yeah, I’ll leave that to you. 

Shortly after I placed my orders, our food was served.

Kate: The meatloaf here is top tier delicious. 

Kate: It’s so tender, it practically melts in your mouth. There’s a specific technique to scoop it up, so let me do it for you. 

(This is kind of embarrassing… but anything to find out Ring’s true intentions!) 

Kate: Ring, say “aaaah”.

Ring: Wha—.... what are you doing? 

Kate: I always feed you like this when we’re on a date, right? 

Ring: Y-yeah… that’s right. You do, but… not today! 

Kate: Why not? We’re lovers, aren’t we? 

Ring: W-we are, but… ahh, fine… 

Ring reluctantly took a bite of the meatloaf I offered to feed him.

Ring: … It’s good.

Kate: Fufu, glad you like it. Here, have another bite. 

(About time he reveals the truth.) 

I gave him the sweetest smile I could, one that was meant for a lover, and hoped it’d push him even more. 

Ring: A-another bite…!? 

Ring: Uwaaahh, my heart can’t take it anymore! … I’m sorry, but the whole lovers thing was a complete lie!! 

Kate: I know. 

Ring: It surely must've shocked y—... wait, you knew? 

Kate: It’s true my memories came back when we hugged at the station.

Kate: But it was also at that point where I realised you were lying. 

Kate: So I decided to play along and find out your true intentions.

Ring: … I did think something felt off after a while. 

Having been completely exposed, Ring let out a huge sigh.

Ring: I wanted you to get your memories back, but I didn't know how to help.

Ring: When I asked Darius for advice, he said that a strong mental shock might work…

Ring: My plan was for you to be so shocked when I claimed I was your lover that your memories instantly come back.

Ring: But it ended up taking way longer than I expected. 

(So that’s what happened…)

Kate: Thank you for worrying about me and thinking of a way to help. 

Ring: Of course I’d be worried.

Ring: You’re always so kind to me. You never give up easily, even when the situation seems hopeless, and that’s something I really respect about you. 

Kate: Ring… 

Ring: I could go on and on about all your good points.

Kate: T-that’s enough! 

(It was terrifying to lose my memories and the past I had with everyone.) 

(But it wasn't entirely a bad experience, because something good came out of it too.)

(... Because I got to know more about Ring than I ever did before.) 

[serenitiesbloom]

cw: angst, slight mention of violence. 1.5k words spoilers ahead if you have not read the manhwa!!

thinking about….Isekaied! reader who one day wakes up in the world of solo levelling and is coincidentally one of Yoo Jinho’s cousins. You, who only just finished reading and binging the whole series of solo levelling and just happened to wake up in its world? Coincidence? Who knows….wait. Is that your phone? The device vibrates and the screen lights up with the caller interface with the name: ‘Jinho-cousin’. You feel yourself have a sense of anticipation. After all, this was one of the characters of your favourite series and now you have a chance to interact with them and not have your screen act as the barrier to your escape. You pick up the call.

Is this a dream? You think to yourself in a bewildered daze as you gaze at the figure in front of you, Jinho beside you introducing the person. However, you’ve always known who the man sitting calmly in front of you was. Sung Jinwoo the main protagonist of solo levelling. In fact, while you not so discreetly oogle him you barely register the hurried introduction Jinho gives you the plea for you to become their third additional member of their guild ... .wait what. You snap out of your reverie, only to see Jinwoo flash a small smile alongside Jinho’s dramatic pleas. Of course, you agree. As you look through your contract you vaguely feel a drilling gaze on you but you brush it off because surely the Sung Jinwoo would never direct his gaze to you, perhaps only a passing glance…

As the days pass, you work alongside Jinho, protecting your guild master’s reputation, promoting the guild, going to meetings with the hunter association when Jinwoo is too busy doing raids in dungeons. While you enjoy your time with the other characters of your beloved series, and indulging yourself with stolen glances of the man you have admired and loved even before arriving into this world, you feel the nagging feeling in your brain reminding you of the one fact you had tried to distract yourself from. His heart is not yours to take, you fool. He has her. As you attempt to do more work, organising Jinwoo’s schedule with the other guilds, a knock on the door interrupts your train of thoughts. You approach the door. “Who is it?” a vaguely feminine voice replies “Is this Mr Sung Jinwoo’s office?” as you open it, a reply on the tip of your tongue but the words die down in your throat as a very familiar figure enters your line of sight.

Cha Hae-In. 

You gape openly. You had known that Cha Hae-In had approached the guild in hopes of joining but this event should have already happened, right? In your shock you barely register the hand coming to a rest on your shoulder. You feel another wave of shock ripple through your stomach as Jinwoo comes to a stop beside you as he subtly draws you closer but surely its just your imagination..right? You brush this off as you quickly usher in Hae-In, your inner fangirl heart squealing from just being able to interact with her. As she and Jinwoo settle onto opposite couches, you turn to take your leave and give them privacy only to get tugged down by a hand on your wrist as you flop onto the couch. You stare incredulously at the man beside you as he continues to converse with Hae-In as if he had not sent your heart spiralling into an abyss of what-ifs. You calm down your racing heart as you observe the conversation. You spy Hae-In’s flushed face and Jinwoo’s confused expression. You smile bitterly. 

Now, as you head downstairs to retrieve the snacks and drinks Jinwoo had asked for Hae-In, you think back on the few interactions you had with him. Perhaps he hadn’t really meant anything when he held your shoulder. You shake your head brushing away the thoughts of what ifs. He’s just your boss, don’t forget your place. As you hurry upstairs, you spot them leaving together. Ah. It must be time for Hae-In’s entrance exam. As he curls an arm around her shoulders and the shadows envelop their figures, you feel the knife in your heart twist. You carefully set down the plate of snacks as the high orc soldier gulps them down. You flop down at your desk and put your head on the table as the earlier scene of Jinwoo and Hae-In close together replays in your mind over and over again. 

How could you ever dream of competing with her? Let alone contest for the heart of the one destined for her? You aren’t even in the original plot, and from what you observed, Jinwoo is still rapidly levelling up each day albeit faster than the original plot. You are the anomaly. Furthermore, let’s not get started on what she has and you don’t. Cha Hae-In, S-rank hunter and vice guild master of the Hunters Guild, the most prominent guild in South Korea, along with her stunning looks, easily likeable personality, enviable combat prowess and so much more. Next to her, what do you have? You sigh as you ruminate in your thoughts as your eyelids grow heavy with the weight of exhaustion and sorrow. ‘There was no way he would look at you like you look at him’. 

But what did he think about this?  

Sung Jinwoo absentmindedly stares at his desk and thinks over recent events. After having to stop Beru from nearly severely wounding Hae-In, and subsequently her interest in him and wanting to join his guild because of that. However when he had returned to the guild, he saw you fast asleep at your desk, tear tracks fresh on your face. After carrying you to the couch and draping his coat over you for warmth, he had then left it at that. The next day however you had returned his coat, siad a brief thanks and went back to work without so much of a peep. He had brushed it off but you were slowly distancing yourself from him, from barely greeting him in the mornings to declining to accompany him for any public events when just before, you would have enthusiastically agreed. He turns this new development over in his brain. Has he somehow offended you in some way? Jinwoo was sure he hadn’t. Could it have something to do with someone else then? Following this line of thought, he approaches your desk, and casually starts up a conversation with you. As you carefully reply to his well-meaning questions, he brings up Cha Hae-In. Jinwoo’s eyes narrow as he spots you growing stiff and as you turn away with a slight shake in your shoulders. This however had contradicted your words of encouraging him to spend more time with her as if you were wanting them to become something more than friends despite your behaviour stating the opposite. Sigh. Had he not made it obvious? He clearly has someone in mind already. You.  He stares at where his palm was once resting on your shoulder. You were warm. He smiles as he thinks back to your bewildered face, all scrunched up. He remembers when Jinho had introduced him to you as the possible third member of their guild. You had the demeanor of an observer  who was not quite here. As the days pass with him working alongside you, he always thinks about your deep gaze, how you seemed to always know something even if he didn't and now you were wanting him to be with someone that isn’t you? You had caught his eye, and Jinwoo couldn’t possibly let you pass him by. You, his lovely one.

Shall he show you a shadow monarch loves?

© serenitiesbloom 2025

a/n: I tried. pt2?

[charrfie]

I recently had a clinical trial related dream and wanted to draw some moments from it. Below the read more I've included my dream journal entry of it and another bonus sketch!

The dream takes place after the events of the game itself, where angel and lee had been living together for roughly a year now. They settled into a schedule and were well accustomed to their daily rhythms. Angel, however, had used this time to start considering what they wanted to do with their life. Now that they weren't reliant on a paycheck to paycheck life, they could consider options and career paths that actually brought them joy, weren't detrimental to their health, and weren't too demanding of them. And so, for the first time in a long while, angel considered going back to college. Lee was quick to encourage them! They didn't know what they wanted to do quite yet aside from being in a creative field, so they planned to go in for general courses and eventually settle into a certain path. Unfortunately for lee, the college they would get into was states away (a couple days drive), and so he missed them terribly but still cheered them on in following their passions.

At first, they had some difficulty making friends. They weren't eager to open up and were afraid that if they did make friends there, they would eventually get burnt out from school a second time and leave them behind. Their favorite class in the first weeks turned out to be a film class! Their roommate also ended up in this same class, and so as luck would have it, they became fast friends despite angel's worries. She was a very adri-equivalent character.... though she WAS someone else in this dream. Unfortunately though, angel would also go on to make enemies with a girl in the same class that was incredibly rude to them for no reason, sabotaging them throughout the semester, tripping them, talking smack about them in front of their face, etc. Even going so far as to spread rumors about angel that almost got angel suspended from the school. It was probably transphobia or something idk; there's no other discernable reason for the random hatred campaign she was running. Thankfully, angel was still well-liked by their classmates and teachers. But it did wear on them.

Lee calls to check up on them often, always offering to make the drive up there in case angel needs anything, though angel is quick to assure him things are working out. They do confide in him about their bully, which he can tell is bothering them, even if they brush it off. He's worried sick about them being so far from home and having to deal with that.

As the semester nears it's end, and angel is getting ready to go back home in a couple weeks for break, they begin making a breakthrough with their bully. Again, for no discernable reason! All of a sudden she's nicer to them, even if there's traces of malice in their interactions with one another. Maybe school WILL be alright, they think. If this works out. If it's all settled. Maybe she's starting to see me as a person instead of a freak to harass.

With the closing of the semester comes two things: one, finals are due. In angel's film class, they're meant to bring in a final film they've shot to present to the class. As these presentations are happening, they're set to have a party in class, with everyone bringing different foods to eat while the watchparty happens! Two, after finals are completed, the last two weeks of the semester will be spent on a field trip where everyone will stay at a fancy hotel and get to go on museum trips to learn about art/film. So of course, angel excitedly speeds to class the morning of the watchparty, only to stop in their tracks when they see a very suspicious looking lee that is painfully aware he is not doing a very good job of hiding. As angel walks up to him, he visibly deflates, trying to excuse it with "I just wanted to make sure you were okay, I was worried." Angel gives him a hard time about it, saying "you couldn't have waited two more weeks?" Despite their teasing though, they feel bashful about the fact that he drove all that way with the intention of just checking on them in secret and driving back home immediately after. So they tell him that they have to go to class, but once they're done then they can let him stay in their dorm room, he only needs to busy himself in the meantime.

They make it to class at the last minute, film hard drive and brownies in hand. Considering that they've been talking about lee all semester with their classmates, they're eager to mention that he's visiting the campus today, so everyone's free to meet him if they want. They do note, however, that their bully isn't in class today, and they're admittedly a bit relieved because- even if they've been making progress with her- they still would rather not send out an open invitation for her to hang out after class. As they settle down and the first films are being pulled up by the teacher on the projector, somehow (AND DON'T ASK ME HOW, ITS JUST DREAM LOGIC) the projector screen at the front of the room suddenly lights up with security camera footage of a random hallway at the school (WHY DID THE TEACHER HAVE ACCESS TO THIS AND WHY WAS IT THE COMPUTER DEFAULT????), and on it is lee chasing down angel's bully into a stairwell. The teacher does not make note of this because she's having too much difficulty figuring out technical problems with plugging in the students' hard drives, so angel darts out of the classroom unnoticed, along with other class friends that follow them.

While I don't remember the exact details of the conversation that followed, angel explained to everyone that they needed to find those two before anything bad happened, and the group split up. Cue running around the school montage! Angel kept trying to call lee in hopes that they could distract him and find out where he was, to no avail.

Out of breath and awfully dizzy after 15 minutes of sprinting around the campus, angel shakily walked out onto a random balcony to get some fresh air and sit down, only to find lee sitting out there already. A lee with........ blood on him, they found. It wasn't a lot, just enough to notice it on his face and a few drops on his shirt. But it was enough to get angel mad enough that they forgot about their dizziness. As soon as lee noticed them, he looked at them silently like a sad, wet puppy who knows he's about to get in trouble. And he was. Bc angel was fucking pissed, not frozen and terrified like the last time they found brandon's body. Not only were they furious over the fact that the day they had been so looking forward to got interrupted by this, not only were they furious that lee had done this AGAIN after promising he wouldn't ever, but the fact that they had been making actual PROGRESS in the relationship they had with this girl and had other ways of addressing it was really the cherry on top. So they fully let into him for it, getting angry enough that they were brought to tears.

Again, the details of the conversation are fuzzy, but I do remember at one point lee said "the people that have passed me on this balcony keep asking ME if I'm alright because they think I've just had a nose bleed," kind of cluing angel in on the fact that he very intentionally didn't clean himself up because he knew he wasn't supposed to do this again and wanted to self sabotage by getting caught before angel could see him. Angel doesn't know what to say or how to handle the situation at all, so they tell lee to just go back to their room, exasperated, and they'll figure out what to do about this later.

There's a bit of a time skip after this point. I know angel returned to their room at some point, only going back to class to tell their teacher that they weren't feeling well and needed to leave early. I can't recall what happened to any evidence of the murder, but it was never an issue. And for the next few days angel makes lee follow them around EVERYWHERE, even on their field trip, bc they don't trust him not to go off and do something stupid (either to someone else to himself). They even make arrangements for him to come on the field trip with them because they don't want to let him out of their sight.

The rest of the dream is the fuzziest (and also I'm tired of writing), but it revolved around the two slowly trying to repair their relationship. Even after the field trip was over and break had started, angel said that they didn't want to go back home and wanted to spend more time away from the house, thinking that maybe their distance from lee at college had perhaps allowed him to spiral into his unhealthy thought patterns again, which he never mentioned over the phone since he wanted to make room for angel's grievances, considering how much they are dealing with. Maybe being on vacation might help. And despite how heavy everything in the dream was prior to this, it eventually lead to some especially cute moments between the pair. Also I remember tammy from anthology of the killer being there at one point for some reason. The end that's all I'm writing. Thank you.

[muddyorbsblr]

relinquish the crown: as long as i've known you pt1

Series Masterlist See my full list of works here!

Placement: Season 1, Episode 16; immediately after 'under one condition pt2'

Summary: Loki makes his affections for you known, and you tell your friends of the turn of events with regards to your impending betrothal

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Word Count: 4.1k

Warning/s: themes of incest (he's adopted but still); Odin; very possibly inaccurate depiction of royal pre-wedding traditions [let me know if i missed anything!]

Things to be aware of: a good chunk of this is 'traditions old and new' (Prologue, Part 2) in Loki's POV; honestly at this point everyone's stressed out

There was no amount of preparation that could have readied Loki for the look upon your face as your perception of him was forcibly shattered and fundamentally changed with three simple words. He couldn't have possibly braced himself enough for the sight of you looking him up and down with growing abhorrence, all while shaking your head and mumbling No to yourself over and over.

"Yes," he said, now only a mere few steps before you. He figured now was as good a time as any to come clean on how long he'd harbored affection for you. "I've loved you for as long as I've known you."

Your bottom lip trembled, your brows scrunching together; another migraine had sunk its hooks into your head. "You've known who I was since the day we met," you said in a weak exhale.

"Yes, I remember, darling." His heart hurt seeing how your body physically rejected the endearment now, the sharp shake of your head as if you were throwing the word away. Or perhaps the last few moments so you could once more cling to denial. "You bested me," he kept on, taking another step toward you. Despite the dull ache he felt, he couldn't keep himself from smiling as he recalled the day in question. "And when I gazed upon your face, I knew. I was meant to be yours. And you mine."

You looked visibly pained recoiling away from him when he cupped your face. He could only imagine how overwhelming it must have felt having your every memory with him simultaneously torn down and repainted with the knowledge that all this time, every embrace, every kiss…had an underlying layer of lust. Of a more lecherous type of love.

"All those times…" you said in a frenzied murmur, your bottom lip quivering as your throat visibly tensed. As if your body were physically refusing to form the words. Your forehead tensed as well, and it was all the god could do not to reach over and offer you some semblance of comfort.

He was the last person you would take it from. And he had to come to terms with the achingly real possibility that it would be that way for the rest of your lives.

"All those times you said you loved me…you did not mean it as family loved family," you continued, your accusatory tone and guarded eyes piercing through him. "You--"

"I meant it as a man loves a woman," he said simply, surrendering to the new reality that now his affections were out for all to see, all to know. The rumors that the palace staff and the citizens of Asgard and beyond alike whispered amongst themselves would be confirmed at the announcement of your betrothal once you accepted the offer.

If you accepted his offer.

You could still reject it and tell him and your father to suffer the fate of the battle, and he wouldn't even dare hold it against you.

It should not have pained him as much as it did to see your features contort into one of rage, your skin reddening from the indignation bubbling to the surface. And yet it did, worsening when you chose to look past him after what he'd just confessed and chose to address Odin instead.

"The people will look at this union and see it for what it is. Sinful." You bared your teeth as you concluded, "Shameful."

"This was tradition for generations upon generations," the elder god attempted to reason with you. "Ages before even I was born, Y/N."

There was such barely restrained wrath in your face, in how you held your posture, that it gave all the gods in the room with you pause. Loki knew you were capable of violence; he'd certainly seen it enough times despite having known you for the shortest amount of time among everyone else in the room. Though never did he consider until right at this moment that you were capable of directing that violence towards any of them.

"There have been new generations since you rose to power!" you fumed. Your nostrils flared as the words spilled from your lips. There was a vein in the center of your head that pulsed furiously, and anyone who knew you well enough could see that you were suffering from what was undoubtedly one of the most vicious migraines to accost you.

If you had a weapon on you, you would have probably struck at the nearest unfortunate soul. In which case it would have been the very man that was the cause of your current troubles. And he would have more than understood if you were suddenly to decide that he deserved to be at the receiving end of your dagger.

That however, did not mean that the knowledge hurt any less, as memories crossed Loki's mind of the first days you knew each other. Particularly that first morning when you'd placed yourself in the line of fire to thwart an assassination attempt. What have I done to wrong the Norns so much that my relationship with the woman I am fated to has devolved so awfully? he thought to himself.

"They were not exposed to this depravity," you continued on. "They will see this union as something so base, so morally corrupt. They will look at the offspring of this union and think them bastards."

Was it wrong that there was the tiniest bit of hope blooming in the god's heart that your mind went to your future and your children with him? Most definitely. And yet he couldn't help himself -- the vision of a little girl with your long dark hair, scrunching her nose the way you once did, freely shifting between her Aesir and Jotun forms as she wished as she frolicked in his mother's gardens -- taking root in his mind, and making his heart ache as it sunk in how desperately he wanted that.

"And give them enough time and I assure you that they will look at me and think me a whore," you concluded, your chest heaving as you visibly fought against your current migraine. You made a motion as if to step toward him, your instinct to seek comfort from him making you even more irate as you fought against the urge. "What happens if I refuse?"

You refuse me, and you would be stuck with that shameful prince of Alfheim. He would take you away and you would never see Asgard again, he wanted to tell you. Instead, he chose to let you come to whichever conclusion you would find for yourself.

"What do you think happens, my love?" The endearment slipped out so easily, so naturally, it almost felt wrong for him to even attempt to take it back.

Tears welled in your eyes, and the god could almost hear the words that you willed to stifle in the back of your mouth. Demanding that he not call you such an abhorrent term. Screaming how dare he even think of calling you such in present company.

And yet instead of those words that would surely press even more daggers into his heart, you chose to answer your own question. "If I refuse then the terms of your relinquishment are unmet. If I refuse…the duel commences." The fat tears at the corners of your eyes finally rolled down your face, and once more Loki had to fight the urge to wipe them away. To pull you into his arms and tell you it was alright to just let your devastation out. To take it out on him, even, if you needed.

But all he could do was stand and watch.

"It does," Thor spoke, confirming your fear that these were your only options. A marriage that you viewed as immoral, or death. His…and in a way because of that spiteful child of an elven prince, yours. "Daughter, I am terribly--"

"You've given me an impossible choice," you cut him off, looking each of them in the eye. "All of you." You crossed your arms around yourself, as if trying to hold yourself back from completely lashing out and letting temper run amok. "Either I lose a part of my family…or I lose my life. My future. Signed away to avoid the bloodshed of new tradition."

If only it were that selfish, he wanted to tell you. I wish it were that simple, little Princess.

"Please don't view it so bleakly, darling."

"Well how else do you suggest I see it?" you seethed at the dark haired prince, your eyes widening in disgust as another realization planted itself in your mind. "Is this why you insisted that I never call you Uncle?"

Well, there's no longer any reason to hide it from her, Loki thought to himself. "In part," he answered you, your nostrils flaring at his admission. "Try to see it less pessimistically, I implore you."

He took a step closer to you, his hands raised with open palms, trying to show you he meant you no  harm. He was the last person in all the realms that would ever wish to inflict upon you any pain.

When you didn't flinch away from him, he continued. "You wouldn't lose your life. You wouldn't have nothing. You would have a husband who adores you. Who loves you with his entire heart." He tried to hold your gaze, praying to the Norns that you would hear the meaning behind his words when he asked, "Wouldn't you agree that you could do a lot worse than being wed to a man who loves you as I do?"

Is this not a better alternative than being shackled to that heathen from Alfheim?

A hint of understanding finally dawned in your features, clearly envisioning the long-term consequences of your refusal. The duel and the subsequent death, all in the name of determining an heir for the Allfather. The wedding and your inevitable departure from your home. The devastation and the misery.

Now it was up to you if those consequences were worth the refusal.

The next few moments seemed to drag on for hours. Days, even. As they all awaited your answer with baited breath.

And then finally you spoke, your words barely audible. "I accept your terms." Your words trembled as you fought back a sob, and you looked up at Loki with a cold, deceptive calm. "I accept your surrender. Only because I love my father. And I do not wish to see him live out his days haunted by the memory of losing you by his own hand."

Where there should have been an aching sorrow in his heart upon hearing your reasoning, there was only relief. She's accepted. She will be safe.

He couldn't help himself from taking your hands in his, hoping to steady their shaking. "I know it will take time but you will be able to find a way to love me, too."

Perhaps it was simply the hopeless optimism in his heart, holding on to the shred of possibility that the vision his mother had shown him months before of a blissfully married life to you, that pushed him to utter those words. Perhaps he still had faith in the knowledge that you two were fated for one another, and somehow your heart would find your way to him.

Even with your next words, he desperately clung to that faith by a thread. The very thread that tied your souls together.

"That's the tragedy of this all, I already loved you," you told him, wrenching your hands out of his hold with a sneer. "Just not in the depraved way that you do. But any affection I may have held towards you dies today." You averted your gaze from his and looked around the god to face your father. "You get to keep your brother. At the cost of your daughter."

With those words, you stormed out of the war room, your heavy footfalls echoing across the palace halls even long after you'd gone.

Hot tears continued to stream down your face and blur your vision as you navigated the palace halls, aimlessly taking turn after turn, trying to put as much distance between you and the war room as physically possible. As if you could escape the crushing weight of your new reality.

You had agreed to a marriage. You were betrothed.

To Loki.

There was a sharp pain at the back of your head, pounding away harder and harder with each step you took that brought you farther away from that wretched room. Worsening when you would pause even for a moment to process what you had just done.

It filled you with a cold dread knowing that you had verbally written off your family with that one meeting, and a burning rage immediately after knowing that they had essentially forced your hand. Surely not a single one of them thought you would take on this betrothal with open arms and a warm and welcoming disposition?

"Y/N?"

You turned your head to find your friends at the other end of the hall. It seemed your aimless wandering led you to the robe laundering facilities, to the remaining familiar faces that didn't make your heart hurt when you looked upon them. Halley and Narda hastened their steps, making their way to you with concern coloring their features once they saw the tear streaks and your red-rimmed eyes.

"My friend, what's wrong?" Narda asked, each of them taking one of your hands as you walked down the hall together.

"My dear friends, I am to be married," you said simply. There was nary a shred of excitement in your tone. You may as well have told them that you were to be executed within the hour.

They stopped abruptly in their tracks, their eyes wide and fearful as they shook their heads at one another. "Princess, you agreed to Prince Damien's--?"

"Norns no," you blurted out, answering Halley's question. "I'll gauge my own eyes out with my training daggers before I allow that heathen of a prince to marry me."

"Then who…?"

You motioned toward one of the stone benches, the three of you seating yourselves with you between the two ladies before answering Narda. "There was this abolished incestuous tradition within my family line, one that Odin rid us of when he'd chosen to go down the path that would lead to his marriage to my grandmother Frigga. In its place…a duel would commence in the event of more than one legitimate heir to Asgard's throne. It seemed that my hand in marriage was requested as a term of Loki's succumbence."

"You are to marry the god of mischief?" Halley squeaked, a pit forming in your stomach when you saw an eagerness in their faces. "Ohh, Y/N this is wonderful news, the prince adores you--"

"Hang on." You withdrew your hands from their grasp, your brows knitting together as another migraine came about. "You two knew about his lechery?"

"Well I wouldn't say we knew," Narda explained. "More like we'd surmised. Much as the prince is the god of lies, there was one truth that he couldn't hide away from any one of us to save his life. His love for you. We tried to rationalize that perhaps the tenderness we would see in his eyes was a familial sort of love--"

"But it was clear to just about anyone that he looked at you the way Narda looks at Fandral…and vice versa," Halley concluded. "He looks at you like a man in love, my friend."

Your face fell at their words. Were you simply so oblivious to what apparently anyone with eyes and a functioning mind could see? Had you truly subconsciously overlooked every gesture and every endearment that Loki sent your way in the name of blissful ignorance?

"B-But never you mind all that, Y/N," Narda spoke again, placing her hands on your shoulders and calling your attention back to them before you lost yourself in your mind. They'd surely known you long enough to see your tells before it became too arduous a task and they would need reinforcements. The most reliable of which was now called your betrothed. "We must strive to look at the brighter side of the situation. You need not marry that loathsome prince of Alfheim anymore, and you need no longer leave the realm after your wedding!"

"And much as this is not what you had envisioned as far as your married life goes," Halley chimed in. "We could still perhaps partake in some wedding traditions…particularly one where your bridal party gets to throw you a couple of celebrations before the ceremony?"

Much as you still struggled to come to terms with the betrothal, your friends had rather valid arguments. And Halley's suggestion began to lighten your mood even by the slightest. "What exactly did you have in mind?"

The silence in the war room was deafening, none of the men inside daring to break it after your understandably emotional exit. Odin seemed to be mouthing words to himself, surely planning away his next steps now that there was no longer any need for the horrendous duel that would have resulted in the end of Loki's life.

Meanwhile Thor held his head in his hands, the only sound filling the room being his deep breaths as he tried to calm himself. Impulsive as the elder god was in his youth, it seemed he didn't wish to say or do anything as rash as you had moments earlier.

"I sincerely hope you realize the gravity of what you've done," the god of thunder spoke, his eyes filled with a mixture of anguish and restraint. "This surrender of yours may have irreparably damaged my daughters relationship with not just you, but all of us."

There was the faintest voice in the back of his mind contemplating taking it all back, the god's heart splintering as the words you'd spewed his and Thor's way replayed over and over. That would be what the coming years, centuries even, married to you would look like. Perhaps even worse as your hatred would fester over time.

If he rescinded his surrender now perhaps he could still salvage what dregs of love and respect you had for him, and he could spend what time he had before the duel finding another way for you to escape Prince Damien's clutches. A way that didn't require you to be shackled to your father's brother, in a gilded cage of forced matrimony.

But he knew well and good that this was the only way to secure your safety. To ensure that you wouldn't have to live out the rest of your days in a loveless marriage that reduced you to barely anything more than an incubator for the elven prince's heirs. Even worse if that wretched prince decided to share you with his trusted comrades and his swine of a father as soon as you were given the dishonor of being called his wife.

Meanwhile the worst that could happen whilst you were Loki's wife had most likely already happened. His love would be unreturned, and the most he could hope for was a lick of civility. He would not coerce you into loving him, and for the most part he would make his best effort to refrain from showing you his affection so as to not add to your discomfort.

All that truly mattered was that he had successfully thwarted Damien's loathsome plans to turn you into little more than a piece of meat to be picked apart by such animals.

His getting to live and escape the bloodshed of the duel for the throne was simply an added recompense.

"Considering what the alternative would have been like for her, Brother, I will happily take her scornful demeanor for the rest of my days," he answered, sincerity pouring out of every word. "She may despise me for as long as I live for taking her choice in marriage away from her, and be appalled by knowing of my affections towards her, but at least she will be here. Safe in the realm she calls home. Surrounded by those that love her most. Better this than all of Asgard losing her…and ultimately her losing any sense of self if Prince Damien has his way."

"The royal court of Alfheim will not take kindly to the news that a unification with our realm by marriage to Princess Y/N is no longer an option," Odin finally spoke aloud. "Namely their crown prince."

"That adolescent in a grown oaf's body is simply ambitious and suffers from delusions of grandeur," Thor said with a dismissive sneer. "And I do agree with you, Brother. To a point. But Father is also right. There will be an effort of resistance on their part, even likely demanding a form of reparation for their time spent gone to waste."

"Perhaps he could challenge me to a duel, then," Loki responded bitterly, a rueful smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. "And I could do all the Realms a favor by ridding them of this pathetic disrespectful excuse of a prince with my bare hands."

"Let us hope it does not come to that, my sons." Odin stood from the table, beginning to circle the room as he spoke of his plans for the immediate future. "We have now entered a time for celebration. There is to be a royal wedding. The likes that may satisfy the proponents of our old and our new traditions alike."

A chill ran down Loki's spine at his father's words, already knowing the course that this conversation would take. Tradition decreed that when a royal was betrothed, there were to be a series of affairs they were to partake in, mainly so the citizens of their Realm could grow accustomed to the new relationship and accept the new dynamics at play.

He always thought of it as being paraded around akin to a child going around their classroom to show the other students their shiny new toy. And now at the center of that attention would be himself…and you.

"You are to engage in a public courtship," the Allfather addressed him. "Get the denizens of the streets of Asgard accustomed to the idea that they will now see you and Y/N in a different light. That you two will now belong to one another and as such, any slight to one of you will be an affront to the other. We can decide what events this courtship will consist of at a later day. For now, we focus on the announcement of your betrothal."

Cognizance seemed to dawn upon Thor's features, his accusatory gaze pinning his brother where he sat. "He has been courting her, Father. All this time. We'd all simply been unaware."

Loki fought back the urge to protest or deny the claim. He wanted more than anything to say that Thor was simply jumping to conclusions now, that he was farcically wrong, as he often was. But as the seconds passed, and he looked back on his interactions with you, he knew that denying it would be nothing but a bold faced lie.

The gifts he would bring back for you upon his return from every assignment Odin or Frigga would send him off to, the time you two would spend together despite having no formal reason to, the gestures he made towards you from the way he would hold you to his side when you passed a crowded street or how he kissed your knuckles when your time together for the day had reached its conclusion. There had always been a layer of intimacy that anyone watching would have seen from leagues away.

You two had been unwittingly engaging in a public courtship since the day you met.

"I assure you, Brother, that had never been my intention," was all he could muster.

"Then these next moons shall come quite naturally to you then, Loki," Odin told him. "And now public courtship is precisely your intention. It is one thing for Y/N to have accepted the terms of your surrender, and ultimately this marriage, but it shall be another thing entirely for the rest of Asgard to accept it. Now, your first act as her betrothed is to find her and inform her of what shall be required of both of you prior to the royal wedding taking place."

"Try not to tell her while she is in the presence of her weapons," Thor quipped. "The last thing we need is for her to be locked in the dungeons for committing avunculicide."

A/N: Pretty sure Thor hated how his brain cells rubbed together and figured it out at the end back there 🫠 But anyways holy hell goddamn I can't believe we're finally here…Season 1 is coming to a close and I can finally get started on planning out Season 2…and writing a whole bunch of other projects alongside it 🤪

Lemme just say right now…the plans I have so far for Season 2? Especially towards the end of it? Chaos (insert baby yoda with the flames here)

I had to split the S1 finale into two parts because honestly it was too long and there was too much going on even for me for a single chapter. The final episode of Season 1 will go up on Friday. 😳

'everything' taglist: @simplyholl @loopsisloops @imalovernotahater @coldnique @loz-3 @huntress-artemiss @salempoe @athalialaufeyson @lokiprompts @kats72 @kikster606 @asgards-princess-of-mischief @lokixryss @thomase1 @mischief2sarawr @lovingchoices14 @lunarnights95 @goblingirlsarah @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @creationsbyme @maple-seed @mjsthrillernp @ladyofthestayingpower @sititran @glitterylokislut @ozymdias @fictive-sl0th  @lokidbadguy @mochie85 @silverfire475 @joyful-enchantress @elizabethmidnight2017 @holdmytesseract @smolvenger @lokidokieokie @superficialdomina @kmc1989 @november-rayne @goddessofwonderland @buttercupcookies-blog @peaky-marvel @lokiified @dryyoursaltyoceantears @herdetectivetheorist @alexakeyloveloki @lulubelle814 @jaidenhawke @km-ffluv

[kumoriyami-xiuzhen]

Hakuoki DS Store Bonus CD 「Carrot and Stick: In the Case of Hijikata and Kazama」

Finally have time to work on translating 🤣! I hope work won't be too busy for a while now that things have settled down... at least until July. It'd be then since a lot of collateral being made now is supposed to be used for a company event then... so I'll hopefully be able to start translating more regularly.

My matters aside, I would like to ask people to please consider supporting Kotowari (@koto-wari), as she has a kofi-page here. Koto has been actively contributing to what Hakuoki content there is now available in English, and has previously translated Hakuoki game content, Hakumyu cast interviews, and some of the Hakumyu musicals among other things. She also helped me with the HAKU-MYU LIVE extras English subtitles!

Anyway, since Koto's favourite route is Hakuoki, I decided to translate this drama cd to go with what I'd be writing to promote her page since a lot of her content does have Hijikata in it.

Enjoy~!

Hakuoki DS Store Bonus CD 「Carrot and Stick: In the Case of Hijikata and Kazama」

Translation by KumoriYami

Hijikata: The Shinsengumi, the organization responsible for the security in Kyoto, heard about another dangerous rumour today. According to the person responsible from the Watch, Choshu ronin are planning another stupid activity.

The best place for secret conversations, of course, is within the alleys of the city.

To catch them, I, Vice-Commander of the Shinsengumi, Hijikata Toshizou, have come to Sumiya in Shimabara.

For this mission, it would be too conspicuous to bring many people.

If we were to move as a group, I'd like to bring Saito and Yamazki, but it'd be a bit difficult to do that this time.

There are reports that Yukimura Kodo may be among the enemy, and he is necessary to the Shinsengumi.

So, to confirm if it's really him, I brought Kodo-san's daughter Chizuru with me.

That's how the two of us ended up alone in a room at Sumiya, when there suddenly was the sound of the door to the room opening.

-----

(door slides open)

Kazama: Hmph, in this time of turmoil, as you're still able to relax and come here and drink, it seems that you're really living a carefree life, dog of the Shogunate!

Hijikata: You... Kazama! Why have you come in without permission!

Kazama: Think nothing of it, I simply thought that voice I heard sounded familiar. That female oni will definitely become my wife in the future, and it must be fate that I met you here tonight.

Hijikata: No one asked you to come in! This room is meant for her and myself! Don't just go spouting nonsense, and get lost!

Kazama: You're just an insignificant human. How dare you use that tone to speak to me?

Hijikata: So what's this about? Are you going to tell us about the inner workings of the Satsuma? Anyway, the purpose of your visit to Sumiya should be to protect someone important. If not, it's to spy on an enemy.

Kazama: How stupid. Do you believe that I'll reveal my hand so easily?

Hijikata: If not, then as I said before, this isn't your business, so get out!

Kazama: Hmph, what a truly impatient man. I have nothing to say to you. But, how about it, female oni. If you pour me a drink, perhaps I'll tell you something.

HIjikata: What?

Kazama: I think you truly are pitiful, having been imprisoned in the lair of these crude and vulgar humans.

Hijikata: I'm sorry that we're such a vulgar group!

Kazama: And they've forced you to dress up as a man! If you dressed up, you'd obviously be an extremely beautiful woman.

Hijikata: Hey! When you're surrounded by men, wearing women's clothing would only be asking for trouble.

Kazama: It'd be a shame for you if this continues, so come with me.

Hijikata: Hey, don't listen to Kazama's words. His stupidity is contagious.

Kazama: What? What you saying is idiotic. You don't even have the ability to protect a woman, wheras I'm different in that respect. I will not allow the woman destined to be my wife suffered any inconvenience.

Hijikata: Wife? You're actually saying that. You're only thinking about how to use her.

Kazama: Say whatever you want, you humans won't understand the way the way we oni display our love to women.

Hijikata: Display love? Hah. You're not going to get rattled, are you? Don't be fooled, he's just talking nonsense.

Kazama: How about it, female oni? If you come with me, first of all, I will allow you to eat your favourite dishes. It would be delicious food that the poor Shinsengumi would never be able to eat, which you would be able to enjoy to your heart's content.

Hijikata: Wha! You bastard! That's so mean!

Kazama: Blame yourselves for not having the means.

HIjikata: Kh! I'm sorry, we've always been destitute.

Kazama: It's up to you if you want to suffer, but do not involve my wife.

Hijikata: That guy isn't your wife!

Kazama: It's only a matter of time.

Hijikata:....Hey, you're a member of the Shinsengumi, right? So you should be aware of your position. If you eat too extravagantly, you will get punished by the heavens!

Kazama: What punishment by the heavens is there to be scared of. Ah, why don't a prepare a kimono for you too.

Hijikata: A kimono? You're saying that so easily, how would you get the money for that?

Kazama: Have you forgotten? I am the leader of the western oni clans. In addition to the compensation from the Satsuma, there are also some hidden assets...

Hijikata: Aahh! I'm really sorry about that! We're just peasants from Tama!

Kazama: How about getting a colourful one that suits you? You won't need to continue pretending to be a man. Don't you want to quickly grasp the happiness of being a woman?

Hijikata: What happiness of being a woman? She doesn't need to wear women's clothes to be enough...

Kazama: Enough... for what?

HIjikata:....Never mind. Anyway, unless you candidly explain things, he'll keep pestering you. Just hurry up and say it clearly. Tell him that you have no obligation to go with him.

Kazama: Hah! Yet you're the one directing her. Alright, female oni, choose me.

Hijikata: What? Even if we say that, you feel troubled?

Kazama: Does that mean you can't make a choice?

HIjikata: I'm telling you, there's no need to be polite to this guy.

Kazama: That's what I wanted to say. Could it be that you still have feelings for the Shinsengumi? Then I have an idea.

(draws blade)

Hijikata: Heh. Drawing your katana at a banquet. There should be a limit to how tactless you are.

Kazama: It's because you aren't listening. Is this truly fine, female oni. If you don't listen to me now, I'll chop off this man's head right here and now.

Hijikata: How would you be able to kill me.

Kazama: Allow me to to demonstrate the difference between humans and oni to you.

(draws sword)

Hijikata: Hmph!

Kazama: There is no way a mere human could possibly defeat me, the leader of the oni clans.

HIjikata: How would you know that if you don't try? I don't know how good your arms are, but my swordsmanship is much better than yours!

Kazama: Stop pretending.

Hijikata: Speaking of which, is it okay for you to cause a commotion here? Didn't you come here for work?

Kazama: Your human politics has nothing to do with me. Although I'm helping out a little bit, that means nothing compared to this. Obtaining the female oni is far more important than that.

HIjikata: What a troublesome bastard you are. If you were a member of the Shinsengumi, you would have been ordered to commit seppuku for disobeying orders!

Kazama: Do not apply the common sense of the Mibu wolves to me. But, it's not like I can let you go now. Just run away with your tail between your legs. Of course, leave this girl to me.

Hijikata: I refuse, you won't be getting away from me. Whether it's me letting you go, or turning my back to the enemy or leaving her alone, I can't do any of that!

Kazama: As expected, you aren't the slightest bit sensible.

Hijikata: You're wrong! This is called fulfilling the mission! (tightens grasp on hilt) Listen carefully, just hide behind me. Don't think about anything unecessary. Tch.... what's with the expression on your face?

Kazama: What's wrong, why do you look like you're about to cry?

Hijikata: Do you really think I'll lose if we fight? Heh, you don't need to worry. Believe in me!

Kazama: Believe in you? Hmph, you have never recognized that girl as one of your comrades, and it's only at a critical time you'd say such nice things.

HIjikata: Ah, it's true that we haven't acknowledged her as one of our comrades.

Kazama: My wife, did you hear that? Indeed, oni can only live together with other oni.

Hijikata: I've already said that she's not your wife! This guy isn't one of our comrades, and is an oni, but so what?

Kazama: What?

HIjikata: Listen, we decided to protect her. Regardless of what kind of blood runs through her body, her background isn't a reason why her fate should be manipulated, so we'll protect her from those kinds of people [I guess?].

Kazama: That girl will be happier if she's with me. Why can't you understand that.

Hijikata: We have a responsibility! We pulled her into this, and she's had her freedom restricted in the name of justice, but even so, this woman has worked hard for us without complaning. As warrors, how could we just abandon her?!

Kazama: Girl, can you believe a man like this? That is what a country samurai would say.

Hijikata: Listen, don't worry. I will definitely defeat Kazama, and bring you safely back to headquarters without fail. Just calmly wait and watch from there. Right, the Shinsengumi is where you belong, so you have nothing to worry about.

Kazama: Hey, why are your eyes tearing up? Were you moved by what he just said? If the situation changes, this man Hijikata will kill you at any time.

HIjikata: Shut up! Isn't it the same for you! If she didn't have the bloodline of the oni, you'd lose interest in her.

Kazama: Hmph... but it's impossible to lose your bloodline. That assumption is meaningless. [not really... hahaha]

HIjikata: No matter what you say, even if we can't resist the tides of change, we're still going to protect her! Regardless of who the opponent is, I will never back down!

Kazama: Hmph...

(sheathes blade)

Kazama: How boring. Since you've ruined my mood, I'm leaving.

Hijikata: Then hurry up... hey! Why are you calling him?

Kazama: Oh? You still want to come with me? What? You'll pour me sake if I tell you about the Satsuma?

HIjikata: Haha, that's right, you said that at the beginning.

Kazama: Why do I need to drink while facing a Mibu wolf.

Hijikata: It's not like I want to do this either. But if you provide information on the Satsuma like you said, it's not like I can't bear it.

Kazama: Refusing will only make the sake taste bad. What? You're saying a man shouldn't be like that?

Hijikata: Hey, we've already given up! If you don't accept this, wouldn't that damage the dignity of the oni clans?

Kazama: Hm.... I won't betray the Satsuma, but I can reveal a bit of insider information on the Choshu. Furthermore, the money for the sake must be billed to the Shinsengumi. Those are my conditions.

Hijikata: Tch... Fine, let's do it that way.

...

Hijikata: In the end, Kodo-san and the Choshu didn't show up. But beause we brought her along, we got some valuable information from Kazama.

With this, it's only a matter of time before we catch those unscrupulous ronin. It was quite strange to be in the face of Kazama as she poured sake for us.

Well the results weren't bad though.

Hmph.

Maybe.

Hijikata Toshizou: Miki Shin'ichirō

Kazama Chikage: Tsuda Kenjiro

------end------

*ahem* i would like to follow-up to the note at I put at the start of this post by saying that I still think Saito is the best. hehehe.��

p.s. if you're a translator looking for a boost for a monetization platform, feel free to reach out to me, though I'll need to be under the impression that you haven't only done a on-off translation contribution to Hakuoki (unless it was something for a Hakumyu musical).

(also im going to get to my messages later today)

[itsnesss]

Dark sensei wolf? I can't get enough.

Maybe Miyago-Do reader and he corners her while she's training in the gym of the hotel during the competition? Possessive?

𝐧𝐨 𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐩𝐞 | sensei wolf × fem!reader

summary | in the midst of the sekai taikai tournament, you find yourself training alone in the hotel gym when wolf corners you, his presence overwhelming. what begins as a simple encounter quickly turns into a battle of control and desire, as he refuses to let you escape

warnings | dark!wolf, possessive, intense sexual tension, manipulation, forceful touching, power dynamics

word count | 0.9 k

author's note | it would help me a lot if you liked, commented and reposted so that more people read what I write and don't forget to follow me, thanks ᡣ𐭩

The night had fallen over the hotel where the Sekai Taikai tournament was taking place. The bustle of the event still resonated in other parts of the complex, but the hotel gym remained quiet, except for the muffled sound of your fists hitting the punching bag. It was the only thing you could do to clear your mind after a day filled with confrontations, strategies, and the constant pressure of knowing everything was about to culminate in a decisive fight. You weren’t thinking about anyone else, just training and perfecting the moves you needed for the next round.

Sweat ran down your forehead as you repeated punch after punch. Strike after strike, as if each one was a burst of frustration, a way to leave behind everything that distracted you from what mattered most. The weight of the gym and the feel of your gloves were like a barrier between you and the outside world.

But then, something changed. A soft sound, barely perceptible, as if someone had entered the room. At first, you didn’t hear it, but something in the air shifted. The atmosphere became heavy. A slight crunch under their feet, and then… the sensation of being watched. You turned your head slightly, and there he was. Only a few meters away, with his intense gaze fixed on you.

Somehow, his presence enveloped you, surrounded you without him making a single movement. You knew he was watching you, as he always did, but something felt different this time. Something dark, something that made you stop in the middle of your training, not even knowing why.

You turned slightly toward him, but you tried to hide the knot forming in your stomach. Why did he always manage to make you feel this way? You didn’t want to admit it, but you couldn’t stop feeling his gaze burning into your skin, relentless, demanding.

"You’re still training at this hour," he said, his deep voice filling the air with a tone you couldn’t ignore. "I thought you’d be done by now."

You turned fully toward him, trying to conceal the nervous tension building inside. Why did he always have this effect on you? You didn’t want to engage in any conversation, any distraction. You just wanted to train. But that was what he did. He was the distraction, the temptation you couldn’t control.

But, as always, he wouldn’t let you escape so easily. In a few swift steps, he was beside you, too fast for your body to react. His hand landed on the punching bag, stopping your movement with cold, calculated pressure. The contact of his skin against yours sent a shiver down your spine.

"Do you think you can train here and avoid me?" he whispered, his body so close now that you could feel his breath on your skin. "You know I won’t let you get away that easily. I’ve been watching you, every one of your movements, like I always do. Have you forgotten who’s really in charge?"

You looked at him, and although you wanted to maintain your composure, there was something in his tone, something in his gaze that made you hesitate. The way he spoke to you, as if he couldn’t tolerate you distancing yourself, as if his presence was meant to dominate you. It was impossible to ignore.

"I don’t belong to you," you said, more like a warning than a truth.

He smiled, that arrogant smile that always unsettled you. He moved a little closer, standing just inches away now. You could feel his breath on your face, warm and controlled, as if he had all the time in the world to play with your nerves.

"No, you don’t belong to me," he admitted softly, "but you’re on my turf now. And here, there’s no room for anyone else. You know that, right?"

The weight of his words hit you, and your mind clouded for a moment. You knew what he was suggesting wasn’t just a threat. It was a power game, a reminder of what he was capable of. What he was willing to do to make sure you stayed where he wanted you.

Without warning, his hands gripped your waist, pulling you toward him. The gesture was so unexpected that you almost lost your balance. He held you with a strength you couldn’t ignore, immobilizing you in front of him.

"You know you can’t escape," he murmured, his voice now lower, almost a whisper. "I’ve been watching you the whole time. And I know exactly what you need. Don’t pretend. Don’t make me waste any more time."

You couldn’t avoid it. The heat radiating from his body, the intensity in his eyes… it all made you feel trapped. You knew what he wanted, and you knew it wasn’t something that could easily be avoided. He didn’t settle for less than total surrender. He wasn’t going to let you go, not while he was in that hotel, not while he was close.

His hands slowly slid to your shoulders, and when you looked up at him, his face was so close to yours that you could feel his breath on your lips. He was playing with the distance, with control. He wanted to see you give in, to acknowledge that you couldn’t fight him, his presence, what was beginning to unravel between you two.

"What we’re doing here," he said, barely a whisper, "isn’t a game, you understand?"

Nervously, you tried to pull away, but his grip tightened, becoming more possessive. There was no way to break free, not without doing what he wanted. And in that moment, you knew. You were trapped.

[blueikeproductions]

commish for @thebigboy71 continuing his Fully Charged Captain Mega idea.

Below is the full Captain Mega backstory that might be filled in more at a later date, and while it was meant to slide more neatly into the cartoon originally in my mind, I went the heck with it and made it into a full on Fully Charged AU.

In this version of events, Captain Mega was the inspiration for Protoman, Namagem and Megaman for a young Dr. Light. Suna is present during the Hard Wars as a toddler just to make a better family connection with her brothers. I don't remember the exact time gap between the Hard Wars and modern era, so we'll say it wasn't that long between the eras.

The Hard Wars specifically were a war between the Emerald Spears, based on the Archie MegaMan group, and Robot Masters, with the Robot Masters having human allies like Dr. Light as they believe the two can work together, as per the original cartoon.

It's unclear who built Captain Mega originally, but Thomas Light looked up to him, as even before the Hard Wars, he was looked on as a superhero by humans and robots alike. He became a paragon of justice during the Hard Wars, but his inevitable skirmish with Sergent Breaker, saw his original body damaged beyond repair, causing Dr. Light to rebuild Captain Mega into MegaMini to save his life.

While Dr. Light built Protoman, AKA Breakman, using what he gleaned from Captain Mega based on some assumptions, he used the full access he had to Captain to update ProtoMan, rebuild Namagem and perfect Megaman.

Sergent Breaker had one last trick up his sleeve, having reprogrammed the massive robot Gamma to attack after Captain Mega was thought dead. The combined might of Suna's brothers, now with Captain Mega's power, was able to defeat Breaker and Gamma... but it caused MegaMan to be rebooted into Aki, while Protoman and Namagem disappeared after the final battle.

Sergent Breaker would capture Namegem as in the original fiction, but reverse engineer his Captain tech to build his Obsidian robotic body and corrupt Megaman's middle brother.

With Aki's circuitry rebooted, he became Suna's big-little brother as she aged, with the two becoming friends with the fanboy-bot Iceman in middle school. Because of Aki's lost memories, MegaMini took it upon himself to guide the young bot, his true successor in the ways of being a Mega Hero.

[punchdrunkdoc]

Part 4, Chapter 10

Summary: After the events of S3, Matt Murdock is trying to once again balance life as a lawyer and a vigilante. But he’s been scarred by loss and betrayal - will a mysterious new neighbour help him heal? Or will her secrets drag him back into the darkness? Notes: This is a slow burn romance with an original female character, told in 4 parts. There is mystery, intrigue, action/violence and angst - all the good stuff!

Also available on AO3 and Wattpad

Masterlist

Reference pics

————–

PART 4

Chapter 10

July 2021

Over 3 years since the Vanishing

Karen hurried through the cemetery, cursing under her breath. She’d meant to be here half an hour ago, but her little passenger had other ideas this morning - ones that involved being crouched over a toilet puking her guts out.

Karen pressed her hand over her lower abdomen as she flitted between headstones, still not used to the fact that she was pregnant - even though the morning sickness, tender breasts and hormone swings were providing ample evidence.

She eventually spied Calina - standing tall and alone beside a freshly-covered grave - and swore at herself again for missing the ceremony.

Calina glanced up as Karen arrived, and frowned. “What are you doing here?”

“Well, that’s a lovely welcome.”

Calina smiled. “Sorry, I’m just surprised. You didn’t have to come.”

“I wanted to be here for you. Well, that was the plan anyway. I’m sorry I’m late.”

“It’s okay. You didn’t really miss anything. Alma didn’t have any family in New York, so it was just me and the priest.”

Karen looked at the gravestone, noting the simple inscription.

Alma Schneider 1940 - 2021 Liebevolle Mutter

“What does the inscription say?”

“‘Loving mother’.”

Loving mother. Karen pressed her hand against her abdomen again, covering the little spark of life within. Those two words held a lot more resonance now than they did just a few months ago. “Did you chose that?” she asked.

Calina nodded. “She only moved to this country to be with her daughter, so I thought it summed up who she was. And now she’s with her daughter again. I know that would make her happy.”

“Do you believe in that?” Karen asked, surprised. “An afterlife?”

Calina shrugged. “Alma believed that. That’s enough for me.”

“And how are you doing? I know you were close to her, so this must have been a shock.” It was the main reason Karen had decided to come today. She was so worried about how Calina would cope with yet another loss from her life, terrified that it might tip her over the edge…

Calina just shrugged again. “I’m okay. I only knew her a short time. And I didn’t really keep in touch with her after I left New York.”

Karen studied her friend, gauging the truth of her words. Surprisingly…she did look okay. Better than okay, actually. She looked good.

The last time she’d seen Calina in person had been after her panic attack last year. She’d seemed frail back then. Thin and gaunt and fragile, and it had scared the hell out of Karen. They’d spoken a lot on the phone since then, and Calina had sounded like she was doing better, but it was such a relief to see that with her own eyes.

She looked healthy now. Strong. She’d put on weight and the dark circles under her eyes were gone. She looked like the Calina she remembered from before.

The knot of worry that Karen had been carrying for the past year eased, and she smiled at the other woman. “Let’s go get something to eat. We have a lot to catch up on.”

———

“Pregnant? Really?”

Karen felt her smile stretch. “Yup. It’s still early - I’m not quite out of the first trimester - but I wanted you to know. You’re my closest friend, after all.”

Calina matched her smile. “You’re mine too. And I think you’re going to be a great mom.”

“I hope so. I sometimes worry I’m being selfish, bringing a child into this world.”

It hadn’t been a planned pregnancy, by any stretch. Just a consequence of taking birth control with a 1% failure rate. But it still felt like a gift. One that she and David should - and would - cherish. But sometimes she wondered if it was cruel to subject a child to this world - a world so different from the one she was born into.

“You’re not being selfish. You’re being hopeful. The world isn’t always going to be like this - there are so many people working to make it a better place.”

“Like the Black Widows.”

Calina waved off the compliment. “We’re just one small part. I see all the time how much the humanitarian organisations are helping, and even just individual communities and people. We may have lost Matt, and Hell’s Kitchen may have lost it’s Daredevil, but there are people like that all over the world trying to make their little slice of it better.”

Karen stared at her friend in astonishment. “Who are you, and what have you done with Calina?”

“What?” Calina laughed.

“The last time I saw you, you were so pessimistic about the world. You called it ugly, and wanted nothing more than to escape it. What changed?”

Calina sipped on her coffee as she seemed to think about her answer. “Time, I guess. And the therapy sessions.”

“That’s good. So you’re really feeling better?” Karen could hear the concern in her voice, as well as the plaintive hope.

“Yes. I feel good,” Calina confirmed, before taking a bite of her sandwich.

Her appetite showed obvious improvement. Her skin had a healthy glow. She’d smiled more today than Karen could remember seeing over the past two years…and the biggest evidence that she really was better was her off-hand comment about Matt.

Nothing had been off-hand about Matt since he’d disappeared. Whenever Calina mentioned him - which she rarely did - she’d stumble over his name, as if the very sound of it pained her. And she could barely talk about him without tears forming in her eyes.

There was none of that today. And it made Karen realise that Calina really was going to be okay. She swallowed harshly, and ducked her head to hide her relieved tears.

“Are you okay?” Calina asked, not missing a thing.

“Yes,” she smiled shakily. “Just hormones.”

———

March 2022

Almost 4 years since the Vanishing

Calina stroked the back of her finger down the baby’s cheek, marvelling at the incredibly soft skin. At the perfectly formed ears, and the tiny cupid’s bow of her lip, and the veins she could see running across delicate eyelids, which fluttered as little Isabelle dreamed.

“She’s beautiful,” Calina whispered, afraid to wake the sleeping bundle in her arms.

“I think so,” Karen replied. “But I might be biased.”

Calina had never held a baby before - which was obvious to Karen as soon as she’d passed her squirming daughter over. Calina had sat stiffly on the sofa, not moving an inch, and Karen had laughed at the sight. “You won’t break her. Just relax.”

“She’s going to cry.”

“She’s not going to cry. She can tell that you’re nervous, so she’s feeling unsettled. If you relax, she will too.”

Calina had carefully settled her weight against the cushions, barely breathing as Isabelle wriggled a bit more, then slowly drifted off to sleep. Now Calina never wanted to let her go. And she regretted the time she’d missed with her. “I’m sorry I couldn’t get here sooner. We’ve been in Argentina under radio silence and-”

“It’s fine, I understand. Besides, you haven’t missed much.”

“Are you sure? I feel like I missed a lot.”

“Not really. For the first 6 weeks, she was pretty much just a lump that slept, ate and cried. Now she actually smiles and giggles - it’s the cutest thing. And she’s starting to show interest in the world around her—”

“I wasn’t talking about Izzy. I was talking about David.”

“Oh. That.”

“Yes, that. You said you were having trouble recently, but I didn’t expect to come here and find your husband gone. What happened?”

Karen collapsed back into her seat and sighed heavily. “Vanishing Sickness.”

“What the hell is that?”

“It’s the term they’ve come up with. On social media. It’s supposedly a combination of survivor’s guilt, depression, and a kind of intense melancholic homesickness. But not for a place - for a time. For how the world used to be.”

“And David has this?”

“Self-diagnosed,” Calina said, her voice sceptical. “And maybe he’s right…but it just felt to me that he couldn’t accept being happy. He couldn’t bring himself to properly move on and build a new life after losing his family.”

“But you’re his family now.”

“I tried to tell him that. To convince him of that. I went to counselling with him. Encouraged him to start the anti-depressants his doctor prescribed, but nothing worked. He couldn’t get passed what he’d lost.” Karen looked down, and picked at the threads in the cushion on her lap. “He started pulling away from me soon after I found out I was pregnant. I tried to ignore it - I just put it down to nerves about impending fatherhood. But after Izzy was born, he just…he didn’t want much to do with her. And then last month, he packed up his stuff and left. Said it was all too hard, and he couldn’t handle it.”

Karen looked away, and Calina could see her blinking back tears.

“I’m so sorry.”

Karen shrugged. “It is what it is. Maybe I should have fought harder for us. Or been more sympathetic - but it’s not like I didn’t lose people too. And I had Izzy to think about. She needed me more than he did.”

“I’m still sorry. I hate that you’re having to do this alone.”

“I’m not—” Karen pinched her lips shut, as if she’d let something slip.

“What were you going to say?”

“Nothing.”

“Karen…”

“Okay,” Karen relented with another deep sigh. “Soon after David left, I started noticing things. Around the house.”

“What things?”

“The broken porch light was suddenly fixed. The banging noise in my car that I kept meaning to see a mechanic about was suddenly gone. There was a new lock on my garden gate…that sort of thing.”

“Someone was taking care of you. A mystery good samaritan.”

“He didn’t stay a mystery for long. I caught him in the act a couple of weeks ago. I came home early from the grocery store - I’d forgotten my purse - and I found him up on my roof replacing a broken shingle. You should have seen the look on his face when he realised he was busted.” Karen smiled, as if reliving the memory.

“But who was it?” Calina leaned forward, as much as the baby allowed, intrigued by the story.

“A man I once knew. Frank Castle.”

“An old boyfriend?”

“No…”

“You don’t seem sure of that,” Calina laughed.

“No. I am. We were never together like…that. We just…I…,” Karen shook her head and laughed. “Me and Frank…it’s hard to distill into a few words. I don’t know where to start.”

“The beginning’s usually a good place.”

Karen smiled ruefully. “It’s kind of a long story…”

Calina gestured to the sleeping baby in her arms and the quietly snoring dog stretched over her feet. “I’m not going anywhere.”

———

“Wow,” Calina breathed, after Karen recounted her various encounters with Frank Castle. “That all sounds…intense.”

Karen huffed out a laugh. “Yeah, you could say that. Intense, dangerous, terrifying…”

“But, you care about him. Despite all that.” Calina could tell by the way Karen spoke about him.

“I do. I was always able to see through to the real him. The rest of the world just saw this unhinged, violent and angry murderer, but he was always more than that to me. He let me see more than that. He let me see the hurt and the pain that was fuelling him. God, he was in so much pain.”

“He lost everyone he loved in an instant.” Calina knew that pain well. Far too well.

“He did,” Karen agreed. “And it broke something in him. The last time I saw him… The last time I saw him I really thought it would be the last time. He was so convinced there was no light at the end of the tunnel for him. And he wanted me out of his life, to protect me. To stop me from throwing everything away for him. I practically begged him to let himself love someone else instead of another war…”

“And what did he say?”

“That he didn’t want to.” Karen’s voice broke, as if reliving the hurt of that rejection.

“What about now?”

Karen shrugged. “He’s…different. I don’t know if he just needed time, or if the Vanishing made him re-evaluate his life. Whatever it was, he decided it was safe for him to be a part of my life. And he decided that he wanted to be.”

“So you’re…together?”

Karen laughed. “I have no idea what we are. At the moment, he’s just helping out. Visiting every few days to see me and Izzy. But it’s enough. I’m happy he’s back in my life.”

“I am too. For your sake. I’m glad you’re not alone.”

“Me too.” Karen punctuated her statement with a yawn. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. You must be exhausted looking after a newborn.” Calina could see the dark circles under Karen’s eyes, and she seemed a little worn at the edges. But despite that, there was a contented aura surrounding her. As if she was exactly where she wanted to be, doing exactly what what she was meant to be doing.  “Why don’t you go upstairs and get some sleep. I can look after Izzy.”

“You just got here. I don’t want to sleep through your visit.”

“I was actually planning to stay for a while. I have a week’s leave built up, so I was going to spend it here, helping you out. If you’ll have me.” She nodded to Nika sleeping on the floor. “Well, us.”

Karen smiled. “That would be…honestly, that would be amazing. If you’re sure? A screaming baby at 3 in the morning is hardly relaxing vacation time.”

“It’s relaxing compared to my normal life, believe me.”

———

Later than night, Karen showed her where all the baby stuff was, talked her through changing a diaper and warming up some milk in case Izzy started crying, then she headed upstairs to bed - after much coaxing and reassurance on Calina's part. “Last year I negotiated a hostage release with a Yakuza boss while dodging sniper-fire from a helicopter. I think I can manage one tiny baby,” Calina joked.

“Let me know if you feel the same after your first dirty diaper.”

Calina laughed and shooed Karen upstairs. Then she settled back down onto the sofa, Izzy once again in her arms. This time, the little girl was awake, staring up at Calina with big blue eyes. “Hi there,” Calina whispered.

Nika - also awake now - jumped up on the couch, curious about the little human. She sniffed at Izzy’s feet and tried to get closer. Calina stopped her and gave her the command to lie down. Nika obeyed with a whine. “I know. But you’ll have to wait for her to get a bit bigger before you play with her.”

“Would you like that?” Calina asked the baby. “Having a dog to play with when you get older? I’m sure you two will be the best of friends.”

Izzy gurgled as if in response. Then she smiled. And it caused something in Calina’s heart to clench.

“Thank God,” Calina breathed. She’d been so worried that the serum would prevent her from forming a bond with this baby - her best friend’s precious child. But she felt something. Even if it was muted - a mere shadow of what it should be - she felt something.

And it was the first thing she’d felt in months.

Her emotions were all still there - and if she really, really focussed she could probably reach them. But she didn’t want to do that. She was content for them to remain distant. A swirling maelstrom, held at bay by the chemicals she was injecting on a regular basis.

She’d once stood at her bedroom window, in the Widow’s base in Maine, and watched a storm unfurl over the harbour. The clouds had darkened, blotting out the light. Fierce winds had swirled over the water, forming rough choppy waves that battered against the moored fishing boats. Rain had lashed down, and lightening had forked through the bruised sky. But Calina had been protected from it all. The thin pane of glass of her window had blocked it all. None of the rain or the wind or the noise had reached her, as she’d watched from her protected vantage point.

That’s how the serum felt to her. She was protected. Safe and untouched behind a glass wall, even as her emotions raged and stormed in the distance.

And nobody had any idea. She’d managed to keep the secret of the serum and how it was affecting her from her sisters. From Dr Gossard. And from Karen. As long as she smiled when she was supposed to. Laughed or frowned on cue. Looked angry or upset when needed…nobody suspected.

She was still putting on an act. Still pretending.

But it was so much easier to pretend to feel, than to pretend your feelings weren’t tearing you apart from the inside out.

———

January 2023

Almost five years since the Vanishing

Calina let herself into Karen’s back garden and gave her companion the command to stand down. Nika took off running around the yard, yipping happily at the birds milling around the water feature, the highly trained and focused dog turning into an overgrown puppy in the blink of an eye.

“I’m here,” Calina called out, stepping through the back door. “Sorry I’m late.”

She stopped short at the sight of a strange man in her friend’s kitchen. Her hand went automatically to her thigh where her gun would be holstered if she was in her Widow’s suit. The man’s eyes clocked the movement, and he frowned as he measured her up.

He looked battle-hardened, his dark eyes flat and emotionless beneath his heavy brow. There was coiled tension in his frame, the muscles in his forearm cording as he clenched one of his fists. The air around him seemed to crackle with barely constrained violence.

He shifted on his feet. Calina readied her stance…

“I see you two have met,” Karen said.

The tense atmosphere evaporated with that wry comment. Calina took a breath, and the man…changed completely. His mask-like expression dissolved into a smile, the corners of his eyes crinkling. And his gaze warmed as he turned towards the woman in the doorway.

Karen stepped into the room carrying Izzy in her arms. “Frank, this is Calina. Calina, this is Frank. Please try not to kill each other.”

On spotting Calina, Izzy squealed with joy and held out her arms. Calina took the little girl and nuzzled her cheek. “Hey, birthday girl.”

Off in the corner, Frank leaned over to whisper something in Karen’s ear.

“You don’t have to,” Karen replied, putting her hand on his chest.

“It’s fine. I’ll let you two catch up.”

He pressed a kiss to Karen’s cheek. As they broke apart, they stared into each other’s eyes, their bodies swaying towards each other, and their connection so palpable it made Calina want to look away.

“Fank!” Izzy yelled out, breaking the spell.

“I haven’t forgotten you, munchkin,” he replied, obviously used to Izzy’s imperious commands. He kissed her pudgy hand and smoothed the wisps of blond hair on the top of her head. “Be good for your mom.”

“I’ll see ya round,” he said to Calina, nodding at her as he stepped into the backyard.

Karen and Calina watched from the window as he greeted Nika. “Hey, girl,” he crooned as he crouched down to ruffle the fur of her neck and scratch behind her ears.

“So he’s a bit of a charmer?” Calina commented, speaking over Nika’s happy noises and Frank’s gruff laugh.

Karen smiled. “In his own way.”

They continued to watch as he made his way to the bottom of the garden and out the gate. Just before it latched behind him, Calina caught a change in him again. The gentle, smiling man who’d kissed Karen was gone. The slightly awkward man - who could barely meet Calina’s eyes while saying goodbye to her - was also gone; he was once again the alert and wary soldier, his expression hard and impenetrable.

———

Later that night - after Izzy wore herself out playing with her new toys and romping around the backyard with Nika - Karen settled her into bed. Then Karen and Calina took up their usual spots on the chairs outside, both huddled under blankets and clutching hot drinks to stave off the icy chill in the air.

Karen gestured to the dog, sleeping peacefully on the cold ground. “Nika’s part husky - she’s bred for winter outdoors. What’s our excuse?”

“Tradition?” Calina suggested.

“Stupidity?” Karen countered.

They both laughed.

“So…Frank,” Calina said, broaching the subject she’d been itching to return to all day.

“What about Frank?”

“Things seem to be going well with you two.”

“Yeah.” Karen smiled as she stared into her mug. “It’s funny. With David, I couldn’t accept the scraps he was willing to give me. I felt like, if he couldn’t step up and be a decent husband and father then him leaving was for the best. But with Frank, it sometimes feels like scraps are all he has to offer, and I don’t care. I accept them gladly. And maybe that makes me a hypocrite or a bad feminist or like I have no self esteem, but I just…”

“You love him.” Calina may have been cut off from her emotions, but Karen’s were plain to see - she lit up every time she mentioned Frank’s name. And Calina may have only been around Frank for a matter of minutes, but his feelings had been pretty clear too. “And he loves you.”

Karen sighed. “Which is both a blessing and a curse.”

“What do you mean?”

“I read a quote once. Back in high school, I think. It always stuck with me. And when I met Frank, it finally made sense. ’Then I understood the true fate of Orpheus, that-”

“‘Love is a constant terror of loss.’” Calina finished, recognising the Polish poem.

“I don’t know if Frank will ever be able to get past that terror. To let himself be a part of a family again. But I love him. For who he is, not who I want him to be. And I think that was the problem with David. I never loved him enough. I…I think I settled for him. I saw someone easy. Uncomplicated. And I thought that was what I wanted.”

“But it turns out you really want difficult and complicated.”

“Yeah,” Karen laughed. “I guess so.”

“Well I’m happy if you’re happy. I just don’t get why you’re always so cagey about you and Frank on the phone.”

Karen shrugged. “I guess I’m used to hiding how I feel about him. Foggy and Matt never understood. God, Matt especially. I think he’d be horrified at the idea of us together.”

“Matt was always too judgemental.”

Karen looked taken aback.

“What?” Calina asked.

Karen shook her head. “Sorry, I just never thought I’d hear you talk about him like that. I always worried you had him up on some sort of pedestal.”

“No. I knew he wasn’t perfect. I guess we both have a weakness for violent, imperfect and complicated vigilantes.”

Karen raised her mug, and toasted the sentiment. “To complicated vigilantes.”

Calina lifted her own mug, before taking a sip of the hot chocolate.

“What about now?” Karen asked, almost hesitantly.

“What?”

“Is there…anyone in your life?”

“Complicated vigilantes don’t exactly grow on trees,” Calina joked, trying to steer Karen away from that topic.

“I’m serious.”

Calina sighed. “No. There’s no one.”

“Has there been anyone? Since Matt?”

“No.”

“Not even a one night stand? It’s been over 4 years…”

And for the first two of those, I’d been a wreck, Calina thought. She’d never even entertained the thought of being with someone else back then. She’d spent all her time and energy just trying to hold herself together.

And now…the serum basically eliminated any and all feelings of desire or arousal. She didn’t want anything. She didn’t yearn for anything or anyone. She didn’t find pleasure in food. She wasn’t moved by art or literature.

She didn’t dream anymore.

And that was fine. It was a trade-off she was willing to make.

But she couldn’t admit any of that to Karen. So she gave her friend a different truth - one equally as valid. Because Calina suspected that even without the serum, she would still be alone. “Before Matt, sex never used to mean anything to me.”

“But Calina,” Karen said, her voice gentle. “Honey, that wasn’t sex. When you were a Widow…before, on those missions…it wasn’t sex. It was a form of rape.”

Calina flinched at the word, a visceral reaction that seemed to bypass her emotionless state - as if her body remembered, even if her mind was still somewhat in denial. “Regardless, it shaped the way I approach sex now,” Calina explained. “It’s not just some…bodily function to me. Mindless pleasure for the sake of pleasure. I need something more. I need a connection with the other person. It has to mean something. For me to give myself over to someone…it has to mean something, like it did with Matt. But I don’t think I’ll ever find that with anyone else.”

“You don’t know that. Matt wouldn’t want you to be alone forever, mourning him.”

“It’s not about that. I just don’t think I’m cut out for a relationship. If I couldn’t make it work with Matt…” Calina shrugged.

“What are you talking about? It was working. It was only because of Thanos—”

“We had a fight,” Calina interrupted, needing her friend to understand - so they could finish this conversation and never return to it. “Just before Matt disappeared, we had a massive fight.”

“But you guys always made up—”

“This felt different. It brought to the surface the fundamental problems with our relationship.”

“Which were…?”

“He never trusted me—”

“Calina-”

“And I never felt worthy of him,” Calina finished.

One benefit of the serum was that she was able to dispassionately evaluate her relationship with Matt. Without her feelings clouding her judgement and colouring her memories, she could look back and see the truth of what they were.

Their connection had been intense. Wonderful. And life-altering - in more ways than one. But she’d been fooling herself the entire time. They never would have stayed the course.

“It’s like a catch-22 thing,” Calina explained. “If a man is able to accept my past, and who I am and what I’ve done - and he loves me anyway - then that just proves he’s too good for me. Which means it would never work out between us. And if he can’t accept who I am, then it also wouldn’t work out. So either way, I’m on my own.”

Karen frowned, and studied her like she used to do when she was worried about her mental state. Calina replayed the conversation in her head and realised her mask had slipped - she’d been a little too dispassionate. A little too glib and analytical in her responses.

Karen would expect her to be upset by her conclusions. To feel pain or regret. To feel something. Instead she’d spoke about her relationship with Matt - and the prospect of being alone forever - with all the emotion of a chat about the weather.

Shit.

“Calina, is everything okay?” Karen asked, still looking at her with concern. “Are you okay? Really?”

“I- I’m fine,” Calina replied, injecting a slight stutter into her words, trying to make herself sound more human. “I think I’m just tired. Can we not talk about this anymore?” She forced a note of sadness into her voice. Then blinked a few times and looked away, as if trying to hold back tears.

It was a stellar performance. A masterclass in manipulation.

The Red Room had trained her well, after all.

“Yes, of course,” Karen said, sounding guilty. 

And Calina felt an echo of that guilt, a hint of it seeping through that pane of glass.

Just a hint…but enough to make her feel like the worst person in the world.

-------

Chapter 11 is coming soon...and that's where we'll be catching up to present time. Who's excited??

And please forgive me for indulging my Kastle shipper heart. What can I say? They deserve a happy ever after too.

Tag list: @hollandorks @stilldreaming666 @sio-ina-bottle @tearoseart-blog @acharliecoxedfan @freckledbabyyy @chezagnes

If you’d like to be added - let me know!

[cannibalcvnt]

Hi! Alek here, wanna share a bit of my side of the story.

We met through a sourcelist Nikolai had posted, where I answered and we began chatting. Nearly immediately he started with the whole “you’re so mature for your age” and “no one understands me like I do”. Red flag, but due to my trauma I thought this was normal. He started being more romantic/sexual, eventually asking me out, saying that because i was above the age of consent it was okay. Immediately, he began cutting me off from friends and family. I couldn’t be in servers, have anyone added on discord, he would track my snap score and my location and become very aggressive if he thought I was talking to literally anyone, which he said was “micro cheating”.

We had arguments daily. I’m not even kidding, and obviously my mental health began to decline rapidly. He would use tactics I told him in confidence that my abuser had used on me. I was utterly dependent and fully convinced I needed him. I was missing school because he couldn’t bear to be apart from me for so long. I couldn’t talk to friends or do anything, couldn’t do things I enjoyed because it meant I couldn’t talk to him. This was not conabuse. I only knew he was a paraphile when he shared his tumblr, after we started dating.

Like Permahunter mentioned, he had my address and school email, and full name. He’d constantly threaten to email them with proof of our conversations, or call the police on me. He knew how damaging this was to me. I wasn’t allowed to have discord, let alone talk to people due to complications with the child exploitation team and social services I work with. This would’ve ruined my life, and he knew that. He would constantly tell me to hurt/kms, threaten me with things like sharing my address online so people could come to my house and “turn me into a child prostitute again”. Once more, not consensual

We constantly broke up and got back together again. I couldn’t stay away and neither could he, I was pretty obsessed and he quickly became my fp. I was convinced he could do no wrong until Permahunter snapped me out of it.

What really drove us away, was when he got on phone call with us, something he knew we were already uncomfortable with, while drunk, he knows we’re a recovering alcoholic, flashed his tits, once again we explicitly said any nsfw call stuff is a massive trigger with us, and proceeded to roleplay being fucked by us over call. As you can imagine, we didn’t do too great with that. Then he demanded we switched, something we struggle to do on command, got mad when we said we couldn’t, started yelling and screaming at a little until they had severe flashbacks and was sobbing to him over the phone, and then gaslit us about the whole event for weeks after. Not very pleasant.

We did threaten to kill ourselves. Because he told us to kill ourselves. Many times. And seemed to enjoy our distress around the subject. Eventually, a programmed alter did try and commit, and we ended up with a lovely ambulance ride and overnight stay in the hospital. Thanks for that. Which he didn’t seem to care about at all

No matter how many times he apologises for getting with us, he has never stopped flirting, being sexual, or asking us out. He’s just as obsessive as ever. And cannot leave us alone.

He talks about “paraphiles not sticking to their words”, but got unreasonably upset every time we mentioned unhealthy coping mechanisms, like self harm and drinking, something we rely heavily on. He is a hypocrite and a liar. He could not handle our emotions nor our disorders, even though he claimed to. He abandoned us whenever we showed symptoms. And is overall not a good person

He’s also admitted to being a Nazi and hanging out with neonazis???? So like. There’s that ig

This isn’t all of it, just all I can think of and bear to type out right now. Enjoy

up early in the morning with this, but as the little over 80 something of you guys know, my name is deimos. im seventeen and i’m a concept writer, a reblogger, and am currently new to transid coining and things of that such.

yesterday i was informed about my ex, Nikolai/Lucas, known as @sacrificalhandler/@traumaarchivo/@sermilitares talking about me. obviously i went to read it and i was understandably pissed, i hate people making up lies about me, and i damn sure wasn’t about to let some pervert lie on me to some gullible people on tumblr LOL. a majority of you saw the post made after but had asked me for the full story, here this is.

i met him little over two weeks ago in a partner system server of my own making, he joined, we talked, we dated. there were multiple instances when he was overly aggressive with me under the guise of it being some mental health problem he had. then came when i joined tumblr with him, i got an anonymous messages saying he was a liar and cheater, obviously im confused. ive come to understand it was my now friend @cannibalcvnt warning me, in my own mind though, i ignored it, and sent a friend of mine to talk to him using the @ he sent me, my friend told me he was talking nothing important, so i assumed it was a troll and moved on.

we broke up because i found out he was cheating on me with alek / @cannibalcvnt, who’s sixteen years old, and in my opinion, more emotionally susceptible to manipulation. nikolai had aleks location ( mine as well, but no threat was there as he was halfway across the world ), his school email, nudes he had forced alek to send him, and more. obviously i was disgusted with this, and alek was scared of him. it took a few days of talking back and forth but by the end of it both alek and i had him blocked. during this time as i was getting information on him i could contact the authorities as well as make a cyber tip about him, i got in touch with someone he knew irl, so said he tried to stab his ex and then raped them. currently this is an allegation, but considering how he is i wouldn’t put it past him.

days went by and i personally watched in real time as he targeted @derwiintersoldat.

i’d like to preface that alek, myself, and soldat are all ramcoa complex did systems, who are programmed/have programmed alters, he used this heavily against alek, he used it against soldat, who he claims consented to it, but he hasn’t brought forward any substantial proof, and soldat a headmate steven would like it to be known soldat was manic and going through an episode, therefore this was under the guise of concent by someone who was already laying their affection on them heavy, which nikolai is known to do.

you all already know how this story with soldat and nikolai ended so i wont push it further, he was in a “conabuse” relationship but there was no consent, so it was just abusive. he made a post saying that both me and alek had agreed to a similar relationship, we didn’t. from what i understand alek met him in a sourcemates server and they started off as friends before nikolai preyed on them ( and this happened little over a month ago, he has no idea how to take a break between these crimes i guess ) and ive already said that our relationship was purely romantic until towards the end our winter soldier introject, sengphet, started dating their rumlow introject.

i think it’s disgusting, i think it’s sick. if you’re coming from his page YES i was manipulating him last night, YES i was lying to him, and yes i do stalk him, he’s talking about people being posers but can’t take a few extra eyes on him and he lost his already shriveled mind, practice what you fucking preach. i wanted a fucking laugh and more evidence so i could make this post, lmao. never in my seventeen years would i want to be friends with a fucking loser like that.

if this guy is your follower/mutual, do yourself a favor and block him because the tl:dr is —

nikolai is a pro contact pedophile who got sexual with a 16 year old at his big age of 19, talks to minors constantly under the guise of being “friends,” lies, abuses programmed people to get himself off, and he’s running all around Europe to evade the authorities, because he’s wrong, and he knows it.

ALL screenshots and such will be my next post, this is already long as hell.

[muchmossymess]

hmmm thinking about what would have happened if Father had gone after lan fan and her philosophers stone rather than greedling

[mc-critical]

Hatice and Ibrahim have never been more divided from each other up to that point than in E43-E44. While Hatice always sensed when Ibrahim was actually in danger or she's lost him in any way (i.e. E35 when she felt something in Edirne while Ibrahim was with Nigar), nothing came up when he was shot; he didn't even tell her what happened to him until she found out herself; they were seperated while he was recovering; the wait for Ibrahim to come back felt like an eternity to Hatice and she went through several breakdowns at once (and his carriage was right in front of her but she couldn't see him, her only thought until the very end was that he was dead, isn't that what her dream with the "crying" statues meant?); when he came back she wasn't allowed to spend at least some time alone with him as SS wanted to talk to him; even their sleep was interrupted. The only thing that Ibrahim asked Hatice to do was to play him his mother's song on the violin (I like to think that Hatice started learning the violin in order to become closer to him, to who he is, to his past again after what they went through with little Mehmet).... but he no longer associates even that with Hatice anymore.

[inscnityclub]

"Who said you’ll be messing with my brother cariño? I love that you’re worried however Ludo knows not to come to my room, but i'll say this side of you makes you look cute.” Sofia didn’t expect this side of Angelo, she always thought he wouldn’t mind a little danger or anything risky. Underneath all this tough exterior and large build, he has a caring and loving soul which Sofia found attractive. “Nothing wrong with being protective my love. You share that with my brother. I was just teasing you nothing more.” Laughing softly placing another kiss after another turning passionate by the second, was Sofia addicted ? all signs point to yes -- she loved the way his lips felt against hers. Lips smacking, soft inhales was all you could heard bouncing off the walls of her bedroom. She smiled laughing softly while he tucked a few strands behind her ear — “Absolutely, i meant it with all of my heart. And good that you think so, I just love how you don’t mind me saying something like that.” Sofia hummed admiring Angelo's perfect face, still in a sitting position on top of him. Then she moved to lay against his side, resting her head on his chest and her arm over his left peck close enough to feel the beat of his heart. “I’m happy to heart that, for so long I was closed off to love but then you came, saving me from a future I thought I’d be forever alone.” Placing a peck on his chest as a way to say thank you. “You already had my heart it was only a matter of time until I couldn’t take it anymore.” She said running her fingertips along his chest, not minding the hairs at all. “You’re mine now, but I’m curious is there anything you don’t like? in relationships I mean. Any Icks?”

NOTHING WENT UNNOTICED BY him especially in the city, his software was cleverly programmed to alert him about Benny. His reasons for doing so wasn't because he didn't trust his husband, he didn't trust anyone who played the role of a random caring friend. Anyone who got near Benny had ulterior motives, Ludo had gut feelings, and his intuitions never lied. Something always happened. "Sadly, i did." He murmured softly, words leaving painfully from his lips as his focus was towards Pollito who was sniffing the grass curiously. Ludo's hands were tucked away in the pocket of his jeans as a way to hug himself for whatever his husband will say. His posture grew stiff when he felt his husband's eyes on him. "The cloud alerts me, i don't want you to think i'm stalking you. After the events of the spiked drink, i'm just doing the best i can to protect you. The world is fucked up and personally don't trust it."

Ludo was ready to hear the worst that he probably enjoyed the kiss or that he missed his brother just not in a friendly way. And though they both discussed this before while he wore his cloak and mask, still, the small part within himself tore him to shreds knowing that his husband and his brother kissed multiple times. As he listened, he could agree to Benny's words. Nobody would win, however, knowing Amaru kissing his husband felt like he won a marathon. It pushed him to keep trying to win, just so happens that Ludo will always be at the finish line and this is something that his brother will realize. "It doesn't matter, Amaru will always find way to win you ; at least try to. What eats him alive is knowing you're married to me, how you'll always pick me above him and all else." Ludo stated meeting his husband's eyes. At least one good thing came from this meeting, his brother didn't touch Benny. The more Ludo heard, he scoffed at the mention of those pictures he probably wanted to use as blackmail. Even the thought of his brother taking off Benny's clothes especially in the state he was in disgusted him. He felt sick. "You said it, this won't restore what little trust i had in him. That will forever be broken, i'll forgive him but never forget. I don't know if he deleted them or not, he could say whatever you want to hear." Even though the damage is done, there is no repairing a broken bond that his own brother destroyed. They will forever be at odds. Now it was his turn, this Dove situation -- it was fair Ludo wasn't proud of his actions though it all came from a moment of hurt. He wanted to feel what it was like to feel something for someone, kiss another person who wasn't someone you proclaimed you love with all your heart. Benny mentioned that one time at the club, where he was all alone and having a good time until Dove came. He knew things would get blown out of proportion and misunderstood. In that club there were cameras, all from different angles. Each one made it on his cloud. "Dove is just a friend, she came on to me. I might've lead her on since the hospital. Despite that, she's been a great friend while i said many compliments about her ; the truth still remains. It might hurt her in the long run. The night at club, you're more than welcomed to see it on the cloud, i'm always a step ahead and i knew there would be videos surfacing around. Every kiss i shared with Dove, i felt nothing. While you think she and i look better, i think she looks way better off with Michele. I've been telling her that she's better off with him and not me. Besides, all i do is talk about you with her, she finds it irritating. And let's say i even fell for her, i could never love her like she expects me to. My heart, my love is only given to one person. But what does Dove know about love, she's never been in love hopefully that changes now that Mich is pursuing her. I drank a few glasses of whiskey that night and though it probably seemed like i was truly enjoying myself i wasn't, i was before she interrupted me." Ludo confessed. "we danced, spoke about why i was alone and why did you let me come alone to a club. When she said that, i regretted letting you go out with your friends that night. I wish was more selfish that night, but i didn't want to go back to my old ways. Sometimes you have to never keep a bird in a cage, birds have to spread their wings fly."

A low snort fell from Angelo's lips, not even surprised that Sofia noticed his reactions. There was no way he could hide anything from her and if he was honest, there wasn't even anything he wanted to hide from her. They never talked about the things he had done while working for Benji's father, but if she was ever to ask, he wouldn't lie about these things. ❝I am gonna be honest, principessa, I am not messing with your brother. And I understand him. I don't have sisters but female cousins and me and my male cousins were just as protective.❞ He stole a sweet kiss from her lips as soon as Sofia's face was close enough to his again. Both of his arms wrapped around her middle. Slowly, he leaned back until his back met the mattress. At the same time, he pulled Sofia with him as their tongues and lips entangled in a passionate, deep kiss. A soft groan fell from his lips. His calloused fingers ran through her soft, long hair, tracing a few strands behind her ear. ❝Oho, threatening me now? Damn, I'm already obsessed with you but you sound hot when you threaten me.❞ A dark glint appeared in his eyes as he looked up at her. ❝But do not worry, Principessa. I don't look at anyone else but you. When I give my heart to someone, I mean it!❞

It was nice to hear that his husband was proud of him and the kiss to his wrist only increased the tingling sensation in his stomach. A loving smile stretched on his lips, unable to tear his gaze away from his husband even though they should keep an eye on their pup. But Benji knew that Pollito wouldn't run away, he was probably busy finding the right bush. Sadly, he knew that this loving, peaceful atmosphere wouldn't last long now that Amaru was a topic again. A soft hum fell from Benji's lips while nodding a bit. ❝I already thought so, I mean that you saw it all.❞ And it didn't bother him because Benji never intended to hide this encounter at all. As he told Ludo about everything, Benji kept his gaze on his husband the entire time. Therefore, he saw the angry cat expression making its comeback the more Benji spoke. But he also knew that they had to go through it now to get the whole truth out. Yet, it was like a sting to the heart when the warmth of his husband's hand left his own.

❝I didn't enjoy the kiss. I ended it too quickly to be considered a kiss in the first place. Just like you, I felt guilty. Those kisses hurt you and they hurt him. We all lose when that happens.❞ Benji answered truthfully and without any hesitation. It didn't feel right that he couldn't hold Ludo's hand anymore, but Benji also didn't want to force his husband. ❝About that night, he said that he put me on his bed and took my clothes off, the underwear remained on by the way. He didn't touch me inappropriately or did anything like that but he admitted that he took pictures of him and me that looked like we did something. Before you ask, no I didn't see the pictures because he said he deleted them. And I believe him, because if he'd still have those pictures, he wouldn't have said anything to me or sent them to you already.❞ Faintly, Benji shrugged while slipping his hands in the pockets of his pants as well. Blue eyes observed his husband and his angry cat face closely, just to make sure he could step in quick enough before Ludo's temper got the better of him. ❝He also said I called out for you several times in my sleep. I know this won't help to restore your relationship with him, I just wanted you to know what he told me.❞ A loud sigh fell from Benji's lips. He turned his gaze away from his husband, trying to look out for their pup. ❝I wanted to tell you right away when you came home. But I couldn't. Not because of Amaru, there is nothing I have to hide. It's because I didn't want to know what happened between you and Dove. The night Amaru picked me up, I saw videos and pictures of you and her dancing and kissing in a club. I didn't want to have this talk, hence I avoided bringing it up in any way or running away before you could talk about it. I'm sorry, Babe, it's not because I don't trust you. My mindset wasn't ready for that talk, my demons were louder. You two looked good together, my insecurities took the better of me.❞ Another sigh fell from his lips and finally Benji turned his head to the side again to take a look at his husband. ❝Don't get me wrong, Babe. I trust you.❞

[andromedako]

looking at stpri stuff recently is like. did they kick nnmr out or did he leave again or like wtf happened. whatever happened good riddance man but its really funny

[yourfourthparent]

women love to play dating sims and choose options. women hate when these options do nothing.