#hes judging us for putting him in jars

[holybibly]

For bunnies who, like me, can't stop thinking about stalker Yunho.

Yunho is a good boy, the most diligent of them all. He's always been this way, apart from a few innocent lies as a child or a few biscuits stolen from the jar when no one was watching. But he has never done anything bad enough to make him feel really guilty. Yunho is a good boy, the nicest of all. He loves his family, his job at the little bookshop on the corner, cosy romantic films, and the thick taste of hot chocolate that melts on his tongue. But there is something he loves more than all of that. 

What Yunho loves most is your used panties, no matter how much he embarrassedly admits it. 

"Oh, God..." The sound of his voice is low and husky, his mouth ajar as he presses it against your expensive silk panties, the rich, creamy fabric sliding down his nose and tickling the flushed skin of his cheeks with the exquisite French lace. 

These are his favourites, although he is equally fond of the lovely peach ones with the little bow at the front that you wear most often. He can tell by the smell, not that he has looked up your skirt... yet. Yunho is too shy for that, and he's not sure he wouldn't get arrested if he tried to put his head up your skirt to see what kind of panties you're wearing on a given day, or if he put his face between your legs as how he always fantasises about and touching the wet, soft fabric with his tongue. Yunho is pretty sure he could easily identify them by the feel of them in his mouth; after all, he's sucked or licked them too many times not to know that. 

But for now, he's quite content to enjoy the taste and the smell of your used panties, and to see you three times a week when you go to his bookshop to buy a new book or some stationery that you keep losing. And you don't need to know that Yunho keeps your pens and pencils in the top drawer of his bedside table. You like to suck on the tip of a pencil when you're concentrating; Yunho likes to suck on it when he's fucking his pillow, imagining it's your tiny, squelching with mucus pussy stretching so beautifully around his cock.

Right now, he's sitting comfortably on your bed, stroking his hard, leaking cock in lazy motions. He's pressing the sticky, slightly damp fabric of your panties, which you'd taken off this morning before going to work, to his face. Yunho rubs the soiled silk between his fingers, feeling the trace of your juices on his fingertips as he takes them into his mouth, sucking sweetly, savouring every hint of your taste. He'd give anything to get a real taste of you.

One of his favourite fantasies is one in which he worships your pussy with his tongue. He knows you'll love it too, judging by how often you highlight such scenes in those kinky novels you read at night. He's read them all; he knows exactly how to make you go crazy for it. Yunho is a diligent student; he's learnt his lesson to perfection. 

Yunho imagines spreading your legs wide, burying his face in your pussy. He will treat you like a true princess and show you how much you deserve to be pleasured and worshipped. He will spread your labia with his fingers and stick his tongue as deep into your hole as he can until his nose rests on your clit and he can no longer breathe properly.

He would let you use yourself as a toy if you wanted him to; he would let you grab his hair and rub your cunt all over his face until you came in his mouth. He would also want you to ride his face while he fucks you with his tongue; he would love to do this as long as you give him permission to learn how to make you cum so that he can do it when you ask him to. It doesn't matter if he cum or not, but he knows he will; he just needs to get close enough to you to do it, not to mention that he has thought about being your boyfriend. He'll go out with you, he'll buy you cake and hot chocolate, he'll love your cat, he'll look after the flowers on your window, he'll give you kisses and spend time with you when you're depressed, and he'll screw you at any time of the day, whether he's busy or not. And he's tough; you can bite or bruise or dig your nails into his back or beat him; he can take anything and much, much worse if it's for you. 

His tongue sticks out to lather your panties with his saliva, barely thinking, his grip on his cock tightening as he jerks himself faster and harder, as if you were the one jerking him off, wrapping your tiny palm around his heavy, hot length so you can sit on it afterwards. Wouldn't that be the ultimate prize? He'd have no problem getting his tongue inside you and sucking your clit for hours on end, but actually fucking you would be a whole other realm of pleasure that he has no idea even exists. You would look so beautiful with your tiny, plump pussy stretched around his cock, and he could be so gentle with you, fucking you like it was your first time—and he really hopes it is because virgins are all dirty; they are the most kinky little desperate bitches who dream of a hard big cock, and Yunho will give you that; he will give you everything. But he can also be rough with you; he can fuck your brain; he can make you squirt over and over and over again. He can even play with you and take you without your consent, the way you have dreamed of it while you were finger-fucking yourself and reading about it in your book. He knows your desire to have him tear you apart, and who is he to deny you that?

He can dream many things. He can dream long enough so that he doesn't realise what he's doing until it's too late, until he feels himself coming and he has nothing to hold on to to hide his presence from your gaze. Nothing but the panties in his hand, which he has no choice but to press against his cock and watch as his cum shakes out in strands so thick they begin to seep through the fabric. 

Yunho looks down at your ruined panties wrapped around his cock, all wet and sticky, and thinks about how one day he's going to cum on your pussy just like that, make it dirty, make it his.

[drenched-in-sunlight]

*SoTE spoilers undercut

This is a continued discussion in light of Marika's newly discovered tragedy. It changes so many things about how we look at the story thus far but more importantly - the DLC story trailer, especially this scene:

think about how Messmer knows, very acutely, that at one point his mother could have been cut up and put in a jar. and that his other kins were not so lucky....... it gives that scene such a tragic edge.

he wasn't doing this just for the violence. this is his answer to Marika's love and all she has done for him. yeah it's not right, it's not justified, but as something done to avenge for the kind of pain she went through? it won't be logical nor right but it's something he will do again without hesitation.

the infirmary in Shadow's Keep shows that he's trying to care for and save whatever left of her people. their people.

the line he said in his armor set description hits different when you consider all that. he wants to be the heir to all her sorrow and all of her pain. wishing that he could alleviate even just a bit of the burden of her grief and survivor guilt.

i wonder if, when Marika hid him in the Land of Shadow, fearing people will judge him for the malevolent snake he carried, she raised him in her home village? this will explain why the Tree Sentinels guarding the village drop two Blessing of Marika - the blessing that specifically stated Marika made it for Messmer's sake and him alone. it will also explain how he knew of his Mother's tragic past and took it upon himself to carry out her wish of vengeance for her people.

(also if you wanted to get to Marika's village, you have to perform the O Mother gesture before her statue in his Shadow Keep, implying he's guarding the way to her home village as well.)

One other thing I like is that in the story trailer, the heroic music sounds like it's for Miquella. and it is, in a way. it is his boss music, but the lyrics has "Ave Marika Aeterna" (Hail, Marika The Eternal).

Given that the boss arena is where Marika - the sole survivor of a whole village, walked through to salvage the remains of her people, making them the symbol of her divine ascension, I wonder if that OST is actually for her - the God, the woman whose story is finally realized in this DLC, and those female voices singing in honour of her are the spirits of her fallen kins: cheering on their last hope for justice. Through this girl, those people who had been wronged and died there will live on eternally.

All this of course seems like such a charitable take on all this, after all Marika ended up being just like the oppressors who used to put her people in jars, but I think I just want to appreciate how the environmental storytelling of this DLC is simply amazing. and once you consider that this is, in the end, Marika's story, everything will make a lot more sense.

[eldritch-spouse]

Hear me out ok? In the middle of the night u just get rlly needy and horny but u dont have the guts to wake vesper up so u use his belly mouth instead to get off. Idk if im mistaken but i think u mentioned about vesper's belly mouth is awake even in the night?

[Yep, correct! Fem reader.]

TW: Somnophilia; Dubious consent then enthusiastic consent.

It's its own special type of Hell, living with Vesper.

Not because he treats you badly. Quite the contrary, as soon as you started making efforts to accept your new reality, he was the first one to volunteer any sort of help, hoping to make you feel as comfortable here as you did in your home, back on the surface. And, putting aside the volumes of mixed feelings you have regarding all this, it's... Sweet of him to at least care about your comfort.

That's not the problem.

The problem is your ceaseless libido.

Ever since you woke up in this ring, in his mansion, you've been burning up with arousal. You're always some degree of wet, sensitive, mind heading to the gutter far too frequently. You want everything and everyone, you want Vesper's touch on your body at every. Possible. Moment. You want him to slip his fingers and tongue anywhere he can and you want him to pick you up like a fucktoy whenever he pleases- Because it feels like nothing will ever sate you these days.

When you brought these concerns to the King, he was more than thrilled by the knowledge, though also a tad empathetic. It must be jarring, yes, he cooed, but you'll soon come to embrace your own desires. They're your true nature, after all.

It was... A strange conversation. To say the least.

Thankfully, Lust is the last place in the universe where you can be judged for excessive sexual cravings. It isn't the possible judgment of others that stops you from going all in, your own thoughts are what makes you hesitate.

Because, even if Vesper has made it very clear that you're to deliberately seek him out when you're bothered -No matter what he's up to- He can't possibly mean all the time, right?

It's common sense that you're not supposed to wake the Icon of Lust from a dead sleep just so you can have sex. How selfish of you! He's a King, he needs his rest.

But Gods... You're so fucking horny.

You can feel your heartbeat in your cunt. Maybe it's from sleeping in the same bed as him, where his loose fluff spreads sometimes, getting into the sheets, contaminating them. That must be the cause of your misery, in retrospect.

Well... You could get up. Look around, have a drink, return to bed after cooling off and enjoying the view from his lavish home. But you're comfortable.

And his smell... Oh, you inhale the pillow between you two faintly, it's addictive.

You don't want to get up. At all. Leaving this room sounds awful.

The tiniest bit of light creeps in through a gap in the massive curtains of your resting chambers, allowing some of the faint reddish glow of night to slink its way in, highlighting the form of your massive, recently proclaimed husband. Vesper sleeps soundlessly, a hand over his chest, the other, once holding you to his side, now dormant on the sheets, fingers periodically twitching. He sleeps bare, to absolutely no one's surprise. Legs faintly parted, offering a view you admire shamelessly in the dark. You've no doubt he has watched you like this before, so it's more than fair you get to ogle as well.

He's gorgeous. He's hot. So hot. You're married to the hottest thing that ever lived. Gods, he's such a whore.

Another flare of heat travels its way up from your loins. It would be exceptionally easy. All you'd have to do is palm at his exposed slit for a moment or two and he'd pop those treats out for you. All for you. He wouldn't even care, it's probably normal for Vesper-

With a shake of the head, you push said thoughts away as hard as possible. See? Not a moment of rest, all these gross ideas swimming around like they belong, like it's right. You're above something so rude!

But you're not above touching yourself in the same bed.

In your humble defense, you need this. You really need this, or you're going to scream and drag yourself on the ground like a bitch in heat. Panties are swiped aside with great haste, both hands quickly darting for the crux of your fire. It takes literally no effort for you to be able to slide two fingers into yourself, then three, trying to roll your clit in the best angle at the same time. It's clumsy, hurried, and unfortunately, fruitless. Instead of relieving you of this insurmountable heat, all it does is incense you further- Wishing it was more, better, bigger.

Wishing it was Vesper that's fucking your little body the way he pleases.

A whimper almost makes it past your clenched teeth.

Beside you, there's sudden movement. A large tail swatting back and forth -Wagging?- While Vesper's brows furrow and his breathing hastens rhythmically, like he's sniffing. When you halt, mortified, so does his stirring.

Idiot.

What a bright idea. As if the King of Lust wouldn't feel your desire right next to him.

Childish irritation settles in you as you sit on your own stewing arousal, sulking. Until a loud rumble jolts you, that is. After a pause of stunted blinking, you put two and two together.

While the demonlord may be fast asleep, a part of him is clearly active. Gaze falling to Vesper's abdomen, his sizeable second mouth can be seen parted, greedily flicking a fat tongue over sharp chops. It pants, a dopey sort of smile, muscle lolling as it very easily detects some poor horny sap nearby.

Or, maybe it recognizes you already. This certainly isn't your first meeting with Vesper's second mouth.

Amused, getting a couple of nasty ideas, you smile at the organ. " Hello there... " You whisper to it.

It doesn't react too much to the sound of your voice, although gleefully wets its lips and chuffs, waiting. You're sure it'll settle back down given enough time.

It's just a matter of ignoring it.

...

......

Fuck it.

Guilty eyes glance from Vesper's peacefully resting complexion to the shifting mouth beneath, and you gulp, self-control falling victim to rabid want. Again.

Slowly, silently, you wriggle out of your undergarments, keeping your breath in check as you move to straddle Vesper's abdomen. Given the size difference, and he seems to plump in a couple areas, you have a difficult time stretching your legs enough to encompass his waist.

Little does it matter, as you don't even get to sit before that muscle has already slapped itself onto your soaked cunt with a decidedly loud PLAP. Cosmic luck alone prevented you from moaning immediately. Vesper turns his face, then settles once more.

This might have been a bad idea.

The mouth is merciless on you, drool slathered on your tights, ass and belly as it gluttonously slurps at you, making lurid sounds you hope to whatever's out there won't wake the King. Terrible idea or not, it's well worth the trouble, because it's exactly the type of pressure you need to get off.

A sweet sigh makes it past your lips when shaky legs lower, having to brace your palms firmly on each side of the bed when the mouth starts smooching tenderly at your lips. How... Sweet. Cute.

Then, suddenly, it latches on. Literally. Its size allows the organ to wrap around your groin easily, applying an all-encompassing suction delicious enough to have you rolling your eyes and jerking your hips forward, nerve endings frying on a pan. God fuck yes, you didn't know it could do that!

An orgasm approaches fast, likely due to how long you've been waiting for it, building up tension. As sensation makes your lower body jerk and tense, shaky legs press you harder against that hungry maw, almost nicking yourself with bold teeth. It feels wonderful. Delightful.

Even asleep, only Vesper can make you feel this good. It's almost too funny a concept to be true.

Nothing halts the flow of keens and gasps you offer when it pauses its slurping to shove that roving muscle into your pussy, flirting with your entrance a little before feeding you more and more and more of itself, until you're groaning at the fullness. The first experimental undulation it makes is so strong that you legitimately moan out, loud and clear, dropping squarely onto Vesper and holding on for dear life as your jostled with each thrust.

You're sure you're drooling on his belly, though it hardly matters, eyelids fluttering, nonsensical pleas chanted in the dark.

" Oh fuck- Yes- Please please please, I need to come. Fffuck, I need to come... "

You're so close! It's right there, you can't wait to get licked and sucked as you ride it out, it'll be so-

" Mm, why didn't you say so? "

You don't even get to have a moment of shame when realization dawns. Large hands grab onto your hips and screw you onto the demonlord's tongue hard enough to make you see stars, the movement in your walls so frantic that you have no choice but to howl in bliss before a single excuse could flow past your parted lips.

And all you can do is flail and cry in overstimulation when Vesper continues sucking at all the arousal you can offer him.

" My Queen should want for nothing. "

His sickly magenta eyes leer at you from the darkness.

" You will come. "

It's a promise.

[salmon-bagel]

Tf2 mercenaries x Seductress! Class! Reader

Warning: nsfw content, female reader, sexism

Scout

When Scout heard that there's a woman who's a professional at seduction, he had already started plotting.

"Hello, name is Y/n L/n, but you can call me the Seductress. It's nice to meet you."

"Heya, nice to meet cha' mommy- Oh, i mean mommy i mean mommy i mean mommy i mean mommy-"

Constantly hits on you. Scout believes that you're the type of girl that's 'easy', someone who will let anyone bang them regardless of who they are.

That boy isn't going to leave you alone until you let him into your pants.

Even when he's not busy trying to get in between your legs, Scout is asking you for advice on how to woo the ladies. Considering you're a professional at flirting with people.

You go back and forth on giving him good advice and bad advice. Sometimes you feel bad that he can't get a girlfriend. Then again, you think to yourself that no woman should be within three feet of Scout because of how much of a horny asshole he is.

After some time, you did grow to have a soft spot for him. Since he's bullied a lot by the other mercenaries. He can be kinda cute when he's not being a complete jerk.

Soldier

Soldier treats you like the other mercenaries. Ruthlessly bleating in your ear when you're doing something wrong.

"GIVE ME ONE HUNDRED SQUATS NOW! I WANT THAT AMERICAN ASS NICE AND PERKY BY THE TIME YOU'RE DONE!"

He wants the best from you. Regardless of your gender, he'll push you to the limit until he's proud enough to call you a warrior.

Soldier tests that you're a good seductress by making you flirt with him. It's an ego boost on his part, but he's genuinely trying to make sure you're hot enough for the enemy.

"YOU CALL THAT FLIRTING!? I'VE HEARD BETTER FLIRTING FROM A MONKEY! AT LEAST THEY CAN PUCKER THEIR LIPS BETTER UNLIKE YOURS!"

Buys you clothing that he believes would work well when you're seducing the enemies. It's always american themed swimwear or lingerie. You began to believe he's just buying that for himself for you to try.

Whenever the team successfully wins for the day, Soldier immediately rushes towards and smacks your ass as hard as he can.

"NOW THAT IS AN ASS I'M PROUD TO CALL AMERICAN!"

Sniper

Sniper believes your work is very unprofessional. Considering he believes you have to whore yourself out to the enemy team. Instead of using your actual skills.

He says he has nothing against prostitution or sex work in general. Sniper just thinks that stuff you do should be kept behind doors and not on the battlefield. He says it causes too much of a distraction. However, you claim that 'distraction' is the point. Sniper doesn't seem to get it.

You honestly could care less what he thinks. Snipers throws jars of piss for a living, and he really thinks he has the right to judge other people?

The truth is you're good at seducing people. Too good. That it distracts him from doing his own job. Sniper has a tendency to watch you through the scope of his gun.

The way your body gets all hot and sweaty from the terrible heat, oh it does something to him. Sniper has imagined licking your sweat off your tits while you degrade him for being such a filthy fuck.

You are his go-to jerk off material. The women in his porno magazines don't get him off like they used. The only way he can relieve himself now is by imagining your fat ass bouncing on his cock.

When he noticed a pair of your panties in the laundry basket, Sniper couldn't help himself to inhale the sweet scent of your panties before putting them back.

Sniper knows he's a damn hypocrite.

He slut shames you for what you do, only to get off to you afterwards. The post nut clarity consumes him with guilt and shame.

Sniper still hasn't built up the courage to apologize to you.

Heavy

Heavy is one of the very few people who treat you like an actual human being. He was raised by a single mother alongside three sisters. Heavy knows to treat a woman right. Less he wishes to face their fury.

Heavy doesn't understand why you seduce the enemy. You're supposed to shoot at the enemy, not bat your eyelashes and wink! However, after watching your work on the battlefield, he gets to more of an understanding.

"Oh, I see. You lie to enemy and lure them in like fish? HA! Very clever!"

Absolutely loves gunning down the enemy that is distracted by you.

Is one of the few men who genuinely falls for you for your personality. Heavy knows you're drop-dead gorgeous, but he knows that beneath all that beauty is a truly intelligent woman. You earned your place on the team by impressing Mann Co., with your skills instead of batting your eyelashes and begging to be a part of the team. You make his heart swoon like no other woman has.

He likes to write you poetry. It helps convey how he feels for you because he's too bashful to put it into simple words.

Heavy is not afraid of anything. Nothing, not even death itself. However, it took him a lot of courage and constant rehearsal to ask you out on a date.

He hopes to start a genuine relationship with you. Heavy doesn't want a one-night stand or be friends-with-benefits with you. He wants you to be his girlfriend and maybe possibly his wife later down the line.

Engineer

"Well, I'll be! Aren't you the prettiest thing I've ever seen."

Engineer is taken aback by your good looks and sauve personality. He genuinely questions why you wanted to be a mercenary. A beautiful lady like yourself is too of high risk to get hurt!

Will always be there to help you if it gets too much for you to handle.

However, he can be very overprotective over you on the battlefield. Engineer thinks it would be safer for you to stay on the rancho relaxo than getting shot at by the enemy. As much as you'd like to not do anything on the job, Mann Co. isn't paying you to be lazy. They see everything and will tell you to get off your ass and start fighting.

You have to beg Engineer that you can do it on your own. He understands your point of view and begrudgingly lets you fight with the others. Even if it means going against his code of defending and protecting a lady when she needs it.

While putting up dispensers and sentries, he can't help to admire you from afar. Engie believes that a guy like him has no chance with a girl like you. What woman would be interested in a bald man who has a robotic hand and locks himself away in his work? No gal that's who.

Engie fantasizes about working up the courage to flirt with you and ask you out, which would eventually lead to a rather sensual night spent together. He did try to ask you out once but miserably failed. Engie kept stuttering and mispronouncing words out of nervousness while attempting to seduce you. You couldn't make out what he was trying to say. Thankfully, Demo had the heart to pull Engie out of that mess of a conversation and save him from further embarrassing himself.

So now, he just admires you from afar. Dreaming that one day he'll get to win your heart.

Spy

Surprisingly, he wants to get to know you as soon as possible. It's not every day you get to meet a lovely lady.

When he learns of your class type, oh boy, this man will make you question if you're even meant to be the Seductress.

"Mademoiselle, you are the most beautiful creature I've ever laid my eyes on."

"Do you know why they call Paris the city of love? Why don't I take you there and show you?"

"If the verb ‘to love’ didn’t exist, I would have invented it upon seeing you."

Spy leaves your entire face red and completely frozen after he's done talking to you. He's so flattering and charismatic. In comparison to the other men, he makes it seem like they're not trying at all. It isn't their fault, though, Spy is a natural at wooing the ladies.

You're surprised when Spy gifts you things that you really like. You never shared these intimate details with him before or with the other mercenaries. When you asked him how he knew what you specifically liked, Spy merely winks at you and grins. He has a way of receiving information without anyone knowing.

He has a tendency to kiss the back of your hand whenever you two are greeting each other. Spy is a gentleman and can't help himself to be sweet to a beautiful woman.

When Spy asks you out on a date, you agree to it because you have been meaning to go out. You felt like you'd go insane if you stayed in the base any longer. You put on your best dress and left with Spy into town.

After having a nice meal and a few glasses of wine, both of you give into temptation. Spy could hardly keep his hands off you when he drove you both back to the base. All your clothes came off the moment you reached his bedroom. You found it a little strange he refused to take off his mask. Oh, what the hell. He's hot and treated you to a nice date.

In the morning, you receive uncomfortable stares from the other mercenaries. Let's just say you and Spy weren't exactly quiet during your lovemaking. Unfortunately for the others, you decided Spy would become your fuck buddy.

Medic

He's been meaning to include a female subject in his experiments- I mean, he's glad to meet you!

You try your best to steer clear of him. However, on the front lines, it isn't so easy. When you're constantly getting shot at and stabbed by enemies, you'll need the Medic's help to get better.

When he sees you in action, Medic feels a new emotion that he's never felt before. Is this.. love? Maybe it is. Or maybe it's just lust.

Medic has never been infatuated with any woman. Except you. The way you lure in these pathetic men with your good looks and false promises, only to kill them afterwards- oh God, it makes him giddy. He feels like a schoolboy all over again!

Medic does routine check-ups on you. To make sure all your lady parts are in working order. In reality, this perverted fuck wants to have an excuse to grope you. Always gaslights you into believing he's not being a degenerate.

"Is this really necessary?"

"Why, of course! Breast cancer isn't something to take lightly!" He'd respond. You would understand, but after thirty minutes of him fondling your breasts, you knew what his true intentions were.

Medic writes you love letters and his dove, Archimedes, deliver them to you.

The letters start off relatively sweet. Medic writes that he views you as a Goddess, a truly ethereal being that is too perfect for this world filled with lesser mortals. And how he's the only man truly worthy for you.

Then, the letters take a complete turn the more you read it. He writes how he wishes to fulfill every filthy fantasy he's ever had with you. Oh boy, the list is long. For one, Medic wants to tie you down, gag you, and breed you like the filthy whore you are. Another consited of how he wants to fuck you on the battlefield while you're bleeding out and fingering your open wound as if it was your pussy.

You've stopped reading his letters and tend to light them on fire.

Demoman

"So, how much do you regularly charge for a quick shag?" He'd ask you before laughing his ass off.

Demo will never take you or your work seriously. Even if you politely ask him to.

He doesn't see what's so hard about showing off your tits and saying how much you love to suck cock. Demo believes you should've been a stripper if you wanted to tease men so desperately.

You frequently explain to him in detail how you help and provide for the team. You honestly can't tell if Demo deliberately forgets or because he gets drunk so often, he hardly pays attention to you while you talk.

Don't worry, though. After you've instilled the fear of women into him, he'll be gladly reminded that he shouldn't judge or ridicule a woman. If his mother were here, she'd knock some sense into him.

Demo apologizes to you, drinks, gets drunk, and apologies some more

"I'm sorry, lassie! It's just that I just get so lonely sometimes! What woman would give me, a one-eyed freak, a chance!"

He bawls on the floor, crying in front of you. You attempt to cheer him up by comforting him. Instead, you end up getting drunk with him.

Did you shag him in the heat of the moment? That's all up to you ;)

Pyro

Has no idea what you're doing to the enemy. Anything sexual you do is translated as innocent in their vision. Will never know what real seduction or sex.

Luckily, they think everything you do is nice and polite!

Regularly gives you grotesque gifts, which are usually human hearts and bones. You begrudgingly take the gifts because you know they mean well and don't wish to be disrespectful.

Pyro has a tendency to go through your closet when you leave your room. Or while you're sleeping. Either why, they steal your clothing and belongings. They pick out outfits and wigs they like along with makeup supplies. You wonder where you placed your dress and immediately begin searching for it. Maybe you left it in the laundry room. As soon as you exit your room, you see Pyro wearing your clothing over their suit. Fake eyelashes have been glued onto their eyes, and lipstick smeared all over the breathing hole.

You can't even be upset with Pyro. They're doing their best.

You let Pyro keep the dress they're wearing, considering it most likely wouldn't fit you anymore.

[byullielle]

Shy Shy Shy // Bang Chan x AFAB!Reader

"What is it that you really want then babe?" "A lot," you whisper softly, looking away from him, "And quite frankly I'm terrified,"

Tags: Smut, Oral Sex (f receiving), Use of Hitachi Wand, Fluff, Slight Name-Calling (by author and chan lmao im so sorry), Petnames (baby, baby girl, etc.), Praises, Shy!Reader, Beginner!Reader,

Disclaimer: title is from TWICE's Cheer Up but the song is FAR from the story. i will make a part 2, but for now enjoy this one. Minors DNI. NSFW Content.

You and Chan have had sex once. He was your first time, and to say that it was sweet and tender was an understatement—and as much as you were shy to admit it, it got you hooked. However, it has been nearly a month since then and nothing seems to transpire between the both of you which left you slightly restless.

Did he find you inadequate the last time? Do you need to practice more? Did he not like it? And one of the self talk that jarred you so much was Why am I constantly horny? Laughable really, you bought a Hitachi wand just to get off yet it wasn't quite the same. Somehow in some way you turned insatiable, only stopped by your shyness and the want to preserve your dignity in front of Chan despite the raging horniness internally embedded in your system.

And worse part is you chose to shut up about it, letting it be kept in like a dirty little secret.

So whenever you and Chan are cuddling for movie night you have to make a more conscious effort to not touch too much, or grind on his thigh, or prolong the kiss just so that you don't jump him and immediately regret it because you have zero clue on what to do. Like right now;

He has one hand on your back, another on your waist, both of you laid down on the couch while he runs his fingers across your clothed spine gently, not even putting pressure. It was relaxing until it suddenly just wasn't. The touch was extremely light yet somehow exhilarating to you, like the little virgin whore that you are. "Y/N-ah?" his voice snaps you out as you rigidly look up, realizing that his ministrations stopped and his hand is parked up at the couch instead, a small frown forming on your face, "I'm sorry, did you not like that?" he softly asks before you tilt your head in confusion.

"The what Channie?"

"You suddenly tensed up, I thought maybe you didn't like being touched on your back,"

Your cheeks redden up, heat flaring on your face as you shake your head shyly, "Not at all!" you defend, wanting to be swallowed whole by the couch, "I–I don't hate it," you stammer.

"Baby, you can tell me if something makes you uncomfortable," Chan frowns, sitting both you and him up instead of laying down, "And I might've pulled your attention from the movie, I'm sorry,"

"No! I swear I'm not lying," you shake your head vehemently, "I didn't hate it Channie. I just–" and before you start to ramble on you stop, tongue automatically lodged in your mouth you couldn't even make a sound even if you wanted to. Chan furrows his brows a bit, "Just what?"

'I'm just incredibly horny when you do that,' was the sentence in mind but where was your tact. You remained seated there like an idiot, unmoving and absolutely speechless.

"I just hope you aren't forced to go ahead with my own whims, Y/N," and oh no he was pulling out the first names. What happened to baby, babe? "If it isn't what you want I can always compromise and comply,"

"Channie," you frown and take his hand, "Like I said it's not that I don't want it,"

"What is it that you really want then babe?"

"A lot," you whisper softly, looking away from him and simply conceding because that face was enough ti tear your heart into two. 0/10, not recommended. "And quite frankly I'm terrified," you admit before your grip against his hand fall weak.

"Like what? I promise I won't judge. I'll give you the world baby, just say the word," he cajoles, cupping your face tenderly as you peer through your lashes, "Promise?"

"I promise, sweet girl. What is it?"

You bite your lower lip, feeling a new surge and boost of confidence before you cup his face and gently pull him towards you, entrapping him in a kiss. You had no idea how to deepen it, simply pushing your lips against his and tugging on his shirt shyly with two fingers until he gets the request. He licks on your bottom lip as you give him leeway to slip it in, trying to slowly move along his motions while trying not to fuck things up by being greedy.

He slots into you perfectly, guiding your tongue against his as you let out a cute little whimper, eyes tightening shut before you both pull away–you for a reprieve and him to check if you were alright, always the gentleman. "Y/N?"

"I have a confession to make," you keep your two fingers on the hem of his shirt, "I–Ever since last month," you squeak out as nervousness makes its way to his face, "It's... It's like I turned into an entirely new person? Like I'm always..." you struggle to properly pull the words out as he patiently waits, "I always need you, Channie. For gods sake I bought a sex toy because of you," you reveal while burying your face in your hands as your boyfriend's eyes widen.

"Really baby?" he asks, his hands finding your arms while he rubs them comfortingly, "Do you...want to do it again?" he asks as you nod, still buried in your hands. "Look at me baby," he coerces you out of your palms, urging you to look up at him, "Do you?"

"Please Channie," you whine, "Don't make me say it out loud,"

"Then how am I gonna know what my baby wants if I don't?" he chuckles lightly, "What do you want? I can help you play with the toy, show me how you do it. Or you can ride my thigh, pretty little baby rubbing her pussy against my leg. Or I can fuck your pretty little cunt, what do you say?"

"Either and all?" you let out in barely a whisper before he chuckles, eyes glazing over with affection and lust before he pulls you to his lap, effectively straddling him. "All it is then," he smiles at you, "Just tell me what you want. I'm all yours,"

Your heart tightens at that, absolutely in love with this man and somehow your core tightens along making you tentatively grind against his thigh, clothed cunt flush against his shorts. "C–Can you guide me?" you ask. He nods before thumbing the garters of your pyjama shorts, "Let's get this off first pretty girl," he instructs before pulling it off, lifting the hem of his shorts so that his bare thigh is pressed against your clothed pussy.

He grips onto your hips, guiding you along as you grind softly, friction building up as your wet and aching cunt rubs along his skin, a series of sweet and small whimpers getting knocked off you as he simply observes, staring at your face intently while your hands try to scramble for anything. "You can touch yourself baby girl, it'll help,"

And without hesitation this time you start rubbing on your clit, feeling the dampness in your underwear grow before looking down to see a tent in Chan's underwear. "Chris, I wanna grind on your cock please," you request as he lets out a 'Fuck,' before tugging his shorts off, leaving him with only his boxer as you shift your placement and start grinding on his boner, a breathless sigh knocked out of you while you lazily rub your clit. "Mnh, fuck baby, I never knew you were this slutty," he chuckles while watching you, "Pretty little baby has so much to show me. Don't you?"

"Only for you," you moan while grinding, the knot in your stomach tightening as you look down and see the feral glint in his eyes adding up. "Kiss?" you ask before he cups the back of your head and pulls you down while you continue your ministrations against his hard cock, now nestled between the gap formed by your soaking underwear.

The kiss turns more and more obscene, the smacking sounds absolutely fuel to the fire in your core, spit swapping between the two of you. Suddenly your clit gets tugged up against your underwear, a louder much more prominent moan knocked out of you which makes Chan's body tense up, "Fuck baby, I wanna eat you out," he begs, "I wanna hear more of that. Can I please?"

You nod before he grabs you by the back of your thighs, instinctively locking your own legs around his waist while he carries you to your bedroom.

Placing you down, he immediately crawls to your aching heat, wet and warm against the fabric of your panties. He tugs on them wordlessly, nearly ripping them off before he simply stares at it. "Where's the toy you bought my love?"

You crawl over the night stand, opening a drawer before pulling out the Hitachi wand and handing it to him shyly. "I–I love playing with my clit," you explain, "It feels good,"

"Alright, I got you," he nods before grabbing the backs of your knees and placing it on his broad shoulders while your stomach tenses up in anticipation. You still had your shirt and bra on but essentially bottomless already, feeling more of a pervert than if you were completely naked. And without warning, Chan licks up a stripe on your pussy, making you yelp out.

He kisses up on your folds before slotting his tongue through, the vibrations of the Hitachi suddenly come to life as he presses it against your clit while fucking into you with his tongue. A loud, obscene moan escapes you, tugging on his hair and your thighs tightening against his face which makes the vibrations more intense.

"Chan!" you yell out, name slipping from your raw bitten lips line a mantra, "Fuck! Fuck! Channie!" you cry out, slowly getting more and more overwhelmed before he stops the wand and detaches his face, making you whine.

Spit and slick cover his chin and nose as he laughs breathlessly, "Fuck, you're so delicious baby girl,"

"Daddy make me cum," you whimper and beg.

"We have all night baby," he soothingly rubs his hand over your thigh, before ducking back in between your lap, "Feeling alright?"

"The best," you choke out, "It feels so amazing Channie,"

"Good," he simply states before you could feel a finger prod into your hole while his tongue starts laving at your cunt again, slurping heard as it makes you roll your eyes back and arch up in pleasure. A litany of moans and whines escape you uncontrollably, Chan's name and profanities a steady stream.

As you approach your high, you can feel the tension in your stomach tightening, toes curling in pleasure while you fist the sheets. He grabs the wand again and presses it against your bud, tongue still spearing into you as the noises spilling out your throat get louder. You tug on his hair, biting your lip with a long drawn groan mixing with his' before you feel the knot unfurl, sensitivity at its peak while you spill into Chan's mouth, his tongue laving and lapping up at your juices.

Your thighs tremble by the sides of his head, a cry escaping you while he keeps on overstimulating you with the Hitachi, making you tug on his arm, "Good girl, take it for now sweet thing. My shy slut," he grins down at you.

Your legs continue to writhe about because of the spent nerves on your clit before he finally pulls away and you let out a deep breath out of relief, eyes clouded with lust and half lidded. You reach out to cup Chan's face, wiping off the slick on his chin with your thumb before licking it off.

"Thank you Daddy," you whisper before pulling his face closer, "Would you please fuck me now? Pretty please? Put your dick into me?"

[mmkclarkey]

We have a spare room- Part 3

When all goes wrong, moving in with three guys will solve it?

It had been three months since you moved in with three random men, all of which having their own weird affect on you. Chris had quickly become the person you went to when you wanted to talk about Taylor swift or Chappell Roan or anything of the sort, he loved the fact that you didn’t judge him for his feminine side. And you loved the fact that he allowed you to rant about anything to him, always giving the best rants back.

This however meant that you had to judge him for something else, now if there’s one thing you learnt about Chris, it’s that he’ll test his luck, he had the tendency to be a dick to his friends. Arthurtv told you about that one time in school when Chris told the girl Arthur liked that they were in a gay relationship, much to the girl’s dismay.

The way to combat this you may ask? Chris does something wrong, he has to put £1 in the jar, they stole the idea, some show called new girl apparently?

Besides Chris, Arthur was the best person to go to if you wanted something interesting, he had this amazing ability to be able to make you laugh at the most random times. Like the time last week where you were all arguing over the shared bathroom, having the biggest shower you tended to argue over who was going to use it when you go out. Arthur fully started to strip off naked, making you all leave as he shouted that he’d flash you all if you didn’t let him use the shower. In the end, you George and Chris sat on the floor outside the bathroom laughing for nearly an hour.

And then there’s George. George was the classic, blast music and go to parties and drink kind of guy. Somehow you found yourself roped into going to yet another influencer party at least once a week, however, you can’t exactly say that you didn’t like it. Aswell as this, he was absolutely amazing at giving advice, about anything, you had problems with filming? George knew what to do. you had no idea what to wear? he did. It was shocking how good the man was at just daily advice, it made you really appreciate the fact that you have him as a friend now.

~

You had uploaded a video three days ago where you were playing a horror game on Roblox, which you didn’t see an issue with and as usual got the views you were used to. But today? Today it peaked, around 9000 more people liked it in just the one day.

Then came the comments. and that’s where you realised your mistake. At one point you scream particularly loud and George (being the only other person in the flat at the time) shouts in from his room asking if everything was okay, to which you laugh and shout through that you are making a video and you’re okay. And this would be absolutely no issue if it wasn’t for the fact that your editor left it in, and your viewers, and just people people in general, did not know that you had moved out of your old flat let alone moved in with another man.

This caused a shocking amount of people to guess that you must have broken up with your boyfriend, and got with George almost straight away, and that’s why he’s in your house, concerned whether you’re okay. It didn’t take long for George to be knocking at your door, asking if you were decent so he could come in.

“I’m decent George, come in”

“So… I saw your comments” he says while sitting down on the bed, a bit of a red look on his face, clearly just back from being outside.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t realise my editor left it in, i’m making a tiktok literally in a minute to tell people that we aren’t together, it just means explaining why I’m here” you say back in an apologetic tone, aware of how overwhelming the fans can be sometimes.

“It’s fine, I promise, do you think we should get us all in the vid just to prove it a bit?” he asks with a curious tone.

You make the decision to do so, making everyone group together on the sofa as you set up your phone, pressing record.

“So… hey guys, i’m making a quick short video to address some things i guess? for reference, I made a video last week that was released three days ago, and in it, George here asked me if i was okay, which is lovely, but we are just friends.”

Arthur giggles and says “We’re all just friends, she just wanted to hide from you guys that she moved out of her old place”

Chris chimes in “Yeah, so if anyone, preferably three girls and a guy want to come wife up this flat feel free”

“Chris shut the fuck up” All three of you say in response, yet all laughing too.

“So yeah, I moved in with Chris, George and Arthur and I guess that’s where I am now, hope this clears things up and I love you all”

You post the video and the comments come in immediately:

this quad is literally iconic

we all know why she moved in with three guys

chris is so Schmidt coded argue with the wall

i’m so glad to see you living your best life baby omg!!

they are such iconic friends we need more videos together

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N i am so incredibly sorry, i’ve been completely procrastinating this, i hope we like it!! also can we notice the fourth wall break xx

taglist: @loveheart-123 @ooostarwarsfandom501st @rougetv @le-le-lea @onlinesuzie @44-ilton @chilwellsancho @pretendyoucantseeme @theresglittleronthefloor @raekensluver @viagracex @neivivenaj @authortelevision

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Stardew valley bachelors (and krobus and the wizard) witnessing the farmer chug multiple jars of mayonnaise. Just really slinging it back.

Okay ngl I never did this till right now and I got everybody's reactions so this is based on the responses my farmer got after doing this

Spoilers: they've all known my farmer for about 7 years so it's nothing too shocking to them,,,but it's still highly questionable lmao

.....

Shane

"Umm..."

For years, him and Pam were beer addicts...and now comes along you, the new farmer who's a very...different kind of addict.

An addict to mayonnaise, that is.

For years, people have been judging him for his habit, so it seems fair that he should be allowed to judge you 100% for having the weirdest fucking habit in the valley.

He started opening up to you (in his 2 heart event) and you're just sitting next to him, drinking mayonnaise to wash out the beer he offered you.

Only after you two get closer does he decide "well shit, they're weird..but they're also one of the few who care about me,,,"

And he eventually lets go of it altogether.

But he'll still tease you about your mayo addiction from time to time.

"What're you gonna put in the potluck this year? Gold star mayo? Or did you already eat it on the way here?"

"Oh shut up."

"Heh heh."

Sam

"Gross!"

Considering it's one of his hated gifts, this shouldn't come as a surprise to you.

But the way you've absolutely freaked him out by drinking it in front of him (and subsequently making him miss his kickflip) was hilarious.

"That's what you get for skating on other people's property." You shook your head, smirking as you bring out another jar. "You think Jodi needs some for later? Or should I just drink it in front of her, too?"

"NO! Stop. Please don't do that." Sam hisses. "One, she might uninvite you from future family dinners. And two, she'll think it's one of those weird trends and blame me for it!"

"A trend..hm? Doesn't sound like a bad idea. This town could use one more tradition." You laugh, consuming the jar and not missing the look of horror on his face.

"A-And I thought Abigail eating rocks was nuts...you two would be great friends.."

Harvey

"Umm..."

While he's well aware of the many health benefits to mayonnaise, he wonders if you know that they're best as a condiment....not a beverage you can just sling back.

"But you told me to lay off the Joja Colas, doctor," you pointed out to him. "You're telling me those are a healthier alternative to this?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying at all." He huffs. "It's just..erm..I've never met someone who enjoyed mayonnaise by itself..it sounds-"

"Disgusting?"

"N-No! I didn't mean it like-"

"I'm kidding, Harvey." You laugh a little, amused by his nervousness. "You know any side effects to drinking large quantities of mayo?"

"..none in particular, but that doesn't mean you should-"

"Then if I start feeling anything different, I'll let you know. Thank you." With a wink, you pull out some dinosaur mayo and drink it on your way out of the clinic...with poor Harvey wondering wtf that was.

Regular mayo was fine, but that green icky-looking mayo...had him gravely concerned over what you were doing to your body.

Elliot

"Why?!"

You thought you were being subtle, drinking a little bit of mayo while hanging out at his beachside cabin.

But nope.

You've absolutely horrified this man. Traumatized, even.

It's almost as bad as the time you left a super cucumber on his doorstep, and the next day he sent you a letter demanding to know who made you play this "cruel prank" on him.

In reality, you thought it'd be a nice gift and he'd make something poetic out of a rare sea creature you fished up.

Apparently not and that's when you quickly learned it's a hated one.

"Oh don't be so dramatic," you shake your head. "It's easier to carry than some full course meal."

"But you could have any other food....why that?" Elliot asks, now genuinely curious about what goes on in your mind to think mayo is a suitable choice in food.

You have no explanation though other than "it's most convenient for me and I like the taste".

So he leaves it alone but....maybe it's better not to drink it around him without warning (or drink it when he's buzzed and he may not remember you doing that).

Sebastian

"Umm..."

And here he was, on Ginger Island, hoping to get a brief vacation away from the valley and all its weirdness.

Yet you came along to visit and check on your beach farmhouse--bringing tons of mayo jars with you.

You got thirsty while talking to Seb in the hot sun, and instinctively began chugging the first thing you opened out of your bag.

You don't even realize what you've done until he gives you the strangest look ever.

"Have you always liked drinking mayo...like that?" He raises an eyebrow.

"Um..not since moving into the valley and learning how to make it." You shrugged, smiling sheepishly as you brought out another jar. This time a green color.

"What's that one?"

"Oh! Dinosaur mayo. It's a lot thicker and kinda tastes like a kale drink-"

"I'm sorry, there's dinosaurs in the mines?"

Alex

"Umm..."

"What?" You shoot him a defensive look, cradling the half-empty jar like it's your baby. "You've eaten every raw egg I give you, and I never judge."

"But..that's a little different, isn't it?" He chuckles nervously. "Eggs are great for protein! Drinking straight mayo is...erm....are there any benefits..?"

"It's easy to make with all the eggs in my coop, and um..it keeps my energy up so I don't pass out."

It's an awkward explanation, considering you simply drink mayonnaise for the hell of it and didn't think too much about the "health benefits".

But Alex completely agrees with you, not making any further comments on it in the future.

Although how he's eaten dozen of raw eggs without getting some kind of salmonella poisoning is beyond both him and you.

Perhaps you're both a little bit strange, but he eventually came to accept that about himself.

Wizard

"Umm..."

From the moment you met him and obtained forest magic, Rasmodius knew there was something peculiar about you.

From gleefully retrieving ectoplasm and prismatic jelly for his studies to assisting him in getting the dark talisman back from his ex-wife's home, he's come to trust you as a potential apprentice.

So to drink mayonnaise while looking through his catalogue of expensive magical architecture had him....a bit confused.

"What?" You look at the man standing by the bubbling green pot, his eyebrow raised in question. "C'mon, surely this can't be the strangest thing you've seen."

"No, whatever keeps your spirit and energy nourished is fine and all. But..mayonnaise seems most unconventional. That's all I'm saying. Now I must focus.."

And that's all he says about the matter, not really caring too much.

You're grateful he didn't overreact.

Krobus

"........"

"You're not gonna say anything?"

"About what?"

"About..y'know..me drinking mayonnaise?"

"Why would I? You gift me void mayonnaise. I eat it and use it as a moisturizer all the time!"

Finally, somebody who finds your habit relatively normal---but the only downside is that somebody isn't human.

Makes you often question if you're really human yourself.

It never bothers Krobus whenever you need to sling back a jar of mayonnaise and pull out another one when you return from the mutant bug lair or hike through Cindersap Forest to reach the sewers.

He thinks it's just a normal thing humans do, but when you mention how it's very much not normal in your "culture"..he thinks THEY are weird for not accepting your tastes.

Welp, at least he supports your weird yet harmless habit.

You did try void mayo once and nearly keeled over, so you stick to regular/duck/dino mayo from thereon.

[brightdown00]

If You Want An ACTUAL 'Feminist Icon' Man With Depth, Then Ares Is Your Best Candidate (NOT Hades!)

He has been SEVERELY misrepresented. Wonder Woman, Percy Jackson, DC Comics ... why didn't God of War use Ares instead of Kratos who is just one of Zeus' lieutenants?

(Don't get too excited just yet, it's still a pretty low bar.)

1) Ares is quite literally the ONLY Greek God (sitting on the Twelve Olympians) who doesn't need to be put on an sex offender registry. (I won't speak for his Roman counterpart, Mars, however ...) The worst he ever did, was seduce Phylonome, an hunting companion of Artemis, in the guise of an shepherd. That's hardly comparable to Zeus seducing Callisto in the guise of Artemis, or Alkmene in the guise of her husband Amphitryon, or Poseidon seducing Tyro in the guise of the river-God Enicepus.

That's right, the 'sacker of cities' isn't a rapist himself. (If you don't like irony, then Greek mythology isn't for you.)

2) Not only is Ares the only one who isn't a rapist, but he has actually stood up for sexual assault survivors more than once (even if they're his mother or daughter!) Ares was famously tried (and acquitted!) for homicide by a jury of the Twelve Olympians, after he slew Poseidon's son for raping his daughter. In one version of the myth, he was found guilty and forced to serve among mortals (which was the same sentence Zeus gave Poseidon and Apollo for conspiring against him). The implication is that all the Goddesses voted to acquit, all the Gods voted to convict, and what with Poseidon as prosecutor, Zeus as judge, and Ares as defendant, there were more goddesses on the jury than gods. Even if Zeus cast his vote to convict, it would have come to a tie and the rule was that the defendant is to be acquitted if there is a tie. (This is what occurred in The Oresteia, the setting of which was also the Areopagus.) When two giant sons stormed Olympus with the intention of taking Hera and Artemis, Ares was trapped by them in a jar, and the implication was because he was defending his mother and he was only a child at the time. He was also present at the punishment of Ixion who attempted to violate Hera, alongside Athena and Hermes.

3) Ares is the father of the Amazons (you hear that, DC Comics?) The founder of the Amazons, Otrera (who, btw, is the mythological founder of the Temple of Artemis at Ephesus), is either his daughter with the wood-nymph Harmonia, or his consort (if she is the daughter of Eurus, God of the North Winds) by whom he fathered Melanippe, Antiope, Hippolyta, and Penthesilea. Their nation's capital city is named Themiskyra in honour of Themis (Zeus' second wife and his aunt by whom he fathered three daughters), whom Ares is on surprisingly close terms with (see the Homeric Hymn to Ares), since he was also the patron god of the law enforcement.

4) One of Ares' epithets is 'feasted by women', in the ancient city of Tegea in Arcadia; during a war between the Tegeans and the Spartans, the women of Tegea defended the city from an invasion led by the Spartan king Charilaus.

5) Women abused by their husbands, as I've read online (but cannot verify), would have likely prayed to Ares for the strength to survive, which makes sense since he is the God of Courage (who else would they have prayed to?), which may have (sadly) further contributed to his unpopularity in Ancient Greece. Likely women also prayed that their abusive husbands would die violently on the battlefield in the next war ... He is, after all, the 'slayer of men'. It's not any different from how mothers would pray to Demeter to bring their daughters back alive, or unmarried girls would pray to Artemis to escape an unwanted marriage ... There's no 'protector of women in Greek mythology' because the Hellenistic religion worked through power bargains with the Gods and their respective domains ...

6) Aphrodite was forced into a marriage with Hephaestus in exchange for Hera's release (Hephaestus initially sued for the hand of Athena which ... didn't work out; see Erichthonius for more detail), Aphrodite expected that she would marry Ares. (They may or may not have been sleeping together before since Dionysus is the one who got Hephaestus drunk enough to do it ... Dionysus is the son of Semele, daughter of Harmonia, Ares and Aphrodite's daughter ... or maybe it's just the wonky timeline in Greek mythology ... ) Love and War. Their children are Eros (the literal Cupid himself) and Anteros (Unrequited Love), Phobos (Fear), Deimos (Panic), and Harmonia (Harmony). They have an open marriage (they are often acknowledged as each other's consort in mythology), despite Ares killing Adonis as a boar (although one version has Artemis killing Adonis as revenge for Hippolytus) and Aphrodite cursing Eos with insatiable lust. Spartans gave Aphrodite the epithet of 'Areia' (similar to how Zeus has the epithet of 'Heraion'). Note how Ares and Aphrodite are the only official couple, whether they're depicted as married or otherwise, on the Twelve Olympians (following her divorce from Hephaestus) besides Zeus and Hera themselves, which brings me to my next point ...

7) Even though Ares was not worshipped by many Ancient Greeks (just as they didn't feel comfortable even mentioning Hades by name), he was always depicted as an handsome soldier, which was the peak of male attractiveness at the time. Legally, he would have been considered as the 'legitimate' heir to the throne of Olympus as the only 'true' son of Zeus and Hera (since Hephaestus was conceived via parthenogenesis), given how the Ancient Greeks projected their own sociocultural norms onto their Gods. He is also one of the most handsome of Zeus' sons (along with Apollo, Hermes, and Dionysus). Bizarrely, he could almost be considered as Ancient Greece's cultural equivalent of Prince Charming in a roundabout way.

8) Ares is the son of Hera (the Goddess of Marriage, Family, and Childbirth, Patron of Women and Queen of Olympus) and the husband of Aphrodite (Goddess of Love and Beauty; Lust and Sexuality; Desire and Pleasure). He is also the rival to his half-sister Athena (Goddess of Wisdom and Reason; Strategy and Warfare; Arts and Crafts) for his father's affections, and shares jurisdiction with his half-sister Artemis over the Amazons. He's also on good terms with his grand-aunt, Themis, and I would assume his aunt Hestia. Zeus and Hera's other children are all daughters (Enyo, Eileithyia, Hebe, Angelos, Arge, Eleuthera), and a part of Zeus is concerned that Ares would overthrow him (more on that in another day, for another post). It's not hard to see why Ares drinks the Respect Women Juice unlike his father, uncles, or brothers.

9) People often use Ares persecuting a pregnant Leto at Hera's orders against him, disregarding that Hera is not only his mother but the Queen of Olympus. Even then, he never did anything more than deny her entrance to cities. The entirety of Ancient Greece itself was under orders to deny Leto sanctuary, and so are you really going to fault Ares for it? ZEUS didn't even hold it against Ares, even though he's his least favourite and Leto is his favourite woman ...

9) Ancient Greek mythology is largely passed through Athens, and they associated Ares with foreigners such as the Thracians (Thrace is said to be the God's birthplace) whom they regarded as stupid, uncivilized barbarians (see 6). His respecting women is likely meant to be seen as a negative trait, and highly correlated with how Ares was seen in general (see 3).

Note: I am NOT calling Ares an 'feminist icon' man, I'm just saying that he is the best possible candidate in Greek mythology.

[icarusredwings]

Welcome to Tonys Pizza

Tonys is used to having heros (and likewise) frequent their joint. Mr. Laufeyson want a pie? Got it. Peter want a slice? A comin right up. Hell! A cocker spaniel and a mutt wanna kiss out back over a meta balla? Fuck it. This is new york! As long as dem dogs aint from jersey.

But one of their longest, and possibly weirdest customers is- you guessed it. Wade.

Here at Tonys we got one saying. You make miya mama cry? You getta slap with da pie. Unfortunately this was true until a lawsuit in '17.

But the point still stands.

So one day, when their friend comes with a bit of extra peperoni on him? Who are they to judge? However, They DO heavily judge the fact that he just ordered a large supreme minus everything except the olives and pineapple.

"What!?? Wade you're gonna make me ma cry!" Tony jr (Tony, being his father, who tragically passed when a group of fellas thought 'pizza' was code for dope and not actual pizza) yells, throwing his hands up.

"I know, I know, but you did it for me last time!"

"Last time, my father also kept pineapples just for you in the fridge! Can't be doing that anymore, bad for business."

"Oh but the rat manning the brick oven isn't?"

"Wha!- Who told you bout- cha know what? Fine. Fine!! Aye Vinny! Our pal Wade here wants the usual!"

"WHAT!?" Came from the kitchen before a man comes out, a long rat tail in the back under his hat. You can take this literally or metaphorically.

I don't care. Im just tellin this story not writing it.

"You want me a go buy a whole pineapple just for one pizza!?"

"Yes."

He sighs, loudly taking off his apron and slammed it on the counter, muttering under his breath. "Why always the crazy ones? Move to new york ma said. Its good buisness ma said. ALWAYS the crazy ones!"

"Love ya vinnnyyy~" Wade cooes, watching him leave. Just as he does, The bell rings again. He leans on the counter with a happy grin.

"Welcome to Tonys! Ya make my mama a- c-Cry?!"

"What's taking so long?" Logan grumbles, having just wanted to go home already.

"You're the wolverine.. ThEE wolverine! Aha!! I need to call my mom! She's not gonna believe this! The Wolverine is in OUR shop!!"

Wade giggles, watching as Logan tilts his head at the attention. "Whats with him?"

"You're the Wolverine, bucko. That's a big deal around this place. Now, what do you want on your pizza, big boy?"

".. they do chorizo?"

"Mhmmm~ why? In the mood for some sausage?" Wade teases, smirking more as he coud hear Tony on the phone in the back.

"Ma! Its him! Its really him! Yeah- no, Im lookin at him!"

"....people like you Logan." Wade smiles to him, seeing him frown. "..They like the old Logan.. they think im him."

Wade's toothy grin expands, standing and leaning against him. "With all due respect, Loagie? You're nothing like him. And I love that."

"Hm."

_____

"Alright thank you guys!"

"No problemo, extra pepperoni!" Tony calls, smilin because his tip jar was now full.

"What the fuck did he just call you?" Logan turns. It wasn't hard to tell he was nicknamed this after his skin.

Putting a hand on his forearm, Wade giggles. "Easy tiger. It's an inside joke. When I first came back- like this" he gestures to his face" I asked them for extra pepperoni. They asked how much, and I said as much as I got on my face. Ever since he's called me extra pepperoni. Hey why do you get to be "super cool wolverine" and im just extra pep?"

Logan shrugs, taking the pizza box as he looks at the label, stopping on a fairly not busy side walk a few houses from the apparentment.

"Wait a sec... Wade.. you did tell them one of these were mine right?"

"Huh? What do you mean? I.. I thought I did?"

Opening the boxes, there stood two perfect pinapple olive, chorizo pies. Steaming and ready to be devoured.

The label on the receipt said "Poolverine special"

Logan cringes. "You put pineapple on our pizza??"

But Wade gasps, eyes lighting up. "Sweet salty AND spicy!! Logan, you're a genius!!"

Lets just say.. Wade picked off all the pineapple from Logan's half of the pizza, and he definitely would be returning for more poolverine specials..

Inspired by @sirwadewilsonfromimgur

Enjoy your very stereotypical ficlet

[aledethanlast]

I want to clarify something about my Lawyer!Andrew post:

Andrew is not doing this to impress people. In fact he actively doesn't want to impress people. He is done being a superman who holds everyone's lives in his hands. It's not good for his mental health when he's doing it and it's not good for anyone when that he fails, because the law is too big and some of these fuckers are just legitimately dumber and more guilty than his literal murderous mafia husband.

Anyways. Andrew wakes up in the morning, goes to his closet and shoves aside the 15k dollar Armani suits so he can put on the two piece he got at Macy's (then tailored to fit, cause he still has standards), and a matching tie.

He goes to the office. Brad asks him if he heard about the latest draft picks. Andrew stares him down until Brad goes to Andrew's desk and drops a quarter in the "Asking Andrew about Exy" jar. Andrew's coworkers seem to think that he's gonna buy the office a Foosball table with the jar money. They are wrong. It is for a new cat tower. Also, no Andrew hasn't seen it, but he got the rundown from Neil and Kevin, so he knows enough to tell Brad not to bother with a season pass for the Sealions this year.

He has two cases to deal with today. The first is a vehicular manslaughter charge. The client is pleading self defense, and that the victim was a stalker. Andrew likes her because, despite bursting into tears every time they have a trial prep session, she actually listens to instructions and knows when to shut the fuck up. He's confident.

The second is grand larceny. The guy is so super incredibly guilty but Brad gave him this case because he knows Andrew loves police misconduct cases and this one is just so full of protocol breaches that Andrew only had to show Neil the file for him to burst out laughing.

Janet says he has a call waiting. Janet is the highest paid paralegal in the county, because she also filters his celebrity mail. Technically Neil's pr firm still represents him, but Janet knows to turn down the DA's gala invitations without needing to argue with him.

He picks up the phone. It's the DA. The man invites him to the police gala because he knows Andrew ignored the emails. Andrew assumes the man was banking on Andrew giving a polite refusal he can wheedle or harangue into compliance. The man is new to the job, so Andrew will forgive this embarrassing miscalculation.

They spend the next hour discussing court dates for a certain case. Andrew's client for that one is disabled and only has partial aid, and he won't let them set court dates that they know she won't be able to attend. The DA, despite his embarrassing naivate, seems to be on the same page in this regard, so hopefully this will go well when they bring the matter to the judge.

In the span of this phone call, two of Brad's clients come into the office, and within five minutes of walking in are made to contribute to the jar. They don't get their questions answered, because he's on the phone, and they're not Brad.

He has court tomorrow. Court is annoying, because it's a room full of strangers who hear his name and forget why he's there, and he's not allowed to bring the jar. Court is a chore, because he has to walk people through their own idiocy, and then occasionally convince the room of just how stupid or brilliant it actually was.

Court is also, maybe, just a teensy bit fun, because whatever the stereotype of a lawyer is, Andrew really isn't it, and that makes people take him a lot less seriously until he starts quoting their words back to them faster than the stenographer.

(Janet also filters job offers. They tend to crop up every few months.)

(It used to be more fun, back in the early days when Neil would sit in sometimes, until he remembered just how horrifically boring the whole thing is. But that's fine. Andrew is happy having his own thing.)

But really, court is easy. It's a place where your word has weight, where promises are binding, and when everything is going to shit, nobody looks at Andrew like he's the freak for keeping his head.

[cottonlemonade]

Hi can I order a medium grape lemonade with a slice of grape for Bokuto! I rlly love your work and ice been reading a lot of it! Thank you so much!

Scream It From The Rooftops

word count: 1095 || avg. reading time: 5 mins.

pairing: Bokuto x chubby female manager!Reader

genre: comfort

warnings: mentions of anxiety and academic pressure

request: fluffy, crush Bokuto takes care of you

“This suuucks.“, Bokuto groaned next to you, ruffling his spiky hair in frustration, “How is a person supposed to remember all of this at once? I feel like my head is about to explode. I need like a second brain in a jar for extra storage. I could bring it with me to the exam and … use a plug or something to harness its knowledge. Yeah! Oh, y/n, I think I‘m really onto something here. Y/n? Hello? Earth to manager?“

You felt a finger poke your shoulder, but didn‘t respond. The words on the page before you had begun to blur and you noticed, with a start, the familiar stinging pressure building behind your eyes. Thick tears soon spilled onto your notes, smearing the ink. “Y/n-chan.“, Bokuto sounded worried when he poked you again, a little gentler this time, “Was the brain thing too gross?“

“I can‘t do it.“, you muttered.

“Do what?“

Your shoulders began to shake, sobs formed in your throat.

“Hey… hey, what‘s going on?“ The captain put an arm reassuringly around your shoulder. A couple of whispers made him look up. Students strewn about in the library had turned their attention to the blubbering, hiccup-ing mess next to him, some peeped out from between bookshelves.

It was rare for Bokuto to become angry. In fact, you had only ever seen it once and it was probably the scariest you had ever experienced the tall, usually bouncy sweetheart.

His golden eyes hardened, jaw clenched and in a firm true captain‘s voice he snapped, “Mind your own business!“

The students quickly went back to their notes or busied themselves with dusty volumes.

“Come on, y/n.“, he said, his voice sweet again and pulled you to your feet.

The tears left hot streaks across your chubby cheeks and you felt the mess your eyes, nose and mouth were making but you couldn‘t stop.

Holding your hand securely in his, he led you out of the library and towards the staircase, ignoring the pointing from people you passed. Bokuto dragged you up a flight, then a second, then a third until finally pushing open the door to the rooftop.

As soon as the heavy metal door fell into the lock behind you, he pulled you into his arms and you broke. You bawled. You hadn‘t done that since you were a child and right now it felt like it had been long overdue. Bokuto‘s strong arms just tightened, holding you close and safe. You brought your own arms up to finally hug him back. He leaned down a bit to engulf you further, making sure to cover as much of your shaking body with pressure as he could. He knew from experience that external pressure helped with an anxiety attack. At least he hoped it was the same for you as it was for him… Many times before you had dragged him out of a dark spiral. From thoughts of failure and disappointment and shame. You‘ve never judged him once, hadn‘t made fun of him when you found him hiding under a table for the first time. You simply offered a shoulder to lean on, an open ear and a hug. He was so relieved he could finally do the same for you.

He felt you trying to pull out of his arms and loosened his grip a bit.

You stared at his shoes, your sobs having calmed down but tears were still dripping on the concrete. Your breathing was shallow and ragged. Bokuto dug around in his pockets for a tissue but could only produce a napkin he had left over from lunch. Before your study session he had gotten himself a taiyaki in the cafeteria and some spilled red bean paste was stuck to the middle. Lips pursed in thought he refolded the napkin so he could offer the clean side to you.

“It‘s all I have right now…“

You accepted it gratefully and blew your nose.

He used the sleeve of his white school button down to carefully dab at your eyes and cheeks.

“Do you wanna talk about it?“

You shook your head. To be fair, it wasn‘t difficult at this point to put together what had upset you.

He pulled you in for a second round of hugs, this time gently running his large hand over your back.

“It‘s all gonna be just fine.“, he said quietly, “And I know, it‘s not much but even if you don't ace every single test, the team won‘t think less of you. We‘ll still love ya.“

You gave a hollow chuckle and he added pressure again to his hold.

“Thank you.“, you mumbled into his shirt.

“You are so very welcome, y/n-chan.“

You let go of him and took a somewhat deep shaky breath, feeling your tears ebb away.

“You know what always helps me? Besides you, that is.“

Still sniffling, you looked at him curiously.

He held up a finger for you to signal to pay attention, then stepped into the middle of the roof, took a deep breath and let out a long scream.

Your eyes widened in panic and you tried to shush him but he just shook his head and came over to get you to join him.

“Come on, give it a try. It‘s pretty awesome.“

“I don‘t know…“

“Come on, we can do it together. On the count of three.“

You couldn‘t believe you were doing this. But sure enough when he finished his countdown you filled your lungs as much as you could and yelled.

You felt the tension subsiding and with another deep breath, screamed again. Bokuto grinned and cheered you on.

“HEY, WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING UP THERE - STOP IT!“, you heard a teacher scolding from the courtyard below.

And you broke into hysterical giggles. It took a while to come down from the laughing fit.

“How do you feel?“, Bokuto asked, beaming.

“Better. So much better. Thank you so much.“

“Great! Come on, we have one last thing to do.“

And he grabbed your hand again to pull you along just as before.

You stopped in front of his locker. Once opened, he gave you a slightly smooshed packet of wet wipes you used to clean your face, then with his signature confident grin he reached for something between his books and held up a handful of little chocolates.

You frowned in confusion. “Why do you have these? You don‘t like mint-chocolate.“

“I know.“, he said and a light blush crept into his cheeks, “But you do.“

a/n: this got so out of hand. Thank you very much for your sweet words! I hope it’s a kind of comfort you were asking for 🌟 thank you for the request!

[hellishgayliath]

Clem’s Log

Hi big brother. Today’s March 10th I think? I’m not so great at remembering dates but Papa was dead set on it because that’s your birthday, it’s amazing how he’s able to remember stuff like that after all this time.

I know it’s been a while since we talked, ever since you left I had to take over bird scout duties and just never had the time to sit down and write. Everyone’s been on edge. Y’know I still hold onto that jar of cinnamon sticks you gave me. Started chewing on them out of habit whenever the anxiety and dread was getting to my head. They taste just like home..

…

Um..

Papa told me he saw you again.

When he and a couple of the others were out on patrol with Mr. Leo and big sis Luci I mean COUSIN SERGEANT Luci haha, I think she’d resent me calling her that but I know she secretly adores me.

…

They said.. they said when they saw you you were.. already turned.

You knucklehead I guess that’s why you left in the first place but to leave without saying anything to anybody?! You know Uncle Mikey would’ve helped you like he did with the others that were infected. Or did you already know that it would’ve been pointless? Don’t you at least owe your own little sister a goodbye?! Dummy dum dumdum..

…

…

Papa thought he could somehow magically get through to you, y’know make you remember who you were before life went crazy.

I heard from Mr. Leo that Luci tried to stop Papa from acting like a idiot and getting himself killed. But she ended up getting hurt instead.

Bad.

…

…

Next thing Papa knew, you and Luci were on the ground, with only one of you moving. Judging by Mr. Leo’s face when I saw him come in, he looked very torn and distraught about a very tough call he had to make. I can already guess what it was he had to do. Cousin Luci is in rough shape but insists on rejecting any medical help saying it’d just be a waste of time and resources. Doesn’t she know we’re just trying to help her? The dumdum… Don’t tell her I called her that. I just don’t want to lose her too.

…

Papa said he could’ve sworn he saw a little smile on your face when he cradled you. Maybe that’s you finally realizing you’re not being controlled by those monsters anymore and can now be at peace knowing you can’t hurt anybody else. At least that’s how I see it. It must have been terrifying to go through that alone.

…

It’s not fair it’s not fair it’s not FAIR IT’S NOT FAIR

They said they couldn’t even bring your body back because of safety reasons and that it would put the base at risk of being tracked so I couldn’t even get to see you one last time!

I miss my big brother, I miss your dumb goofy smile, I miss us having bug eating competitions and laughing at you nearly choking on a beetle, I miss falling asleep on each other while watching tv, I miss seeing you chase after the raccoons with a broomstick whenever they raided our trash cans, I miss the dogs, I miss the taste of fresh fruit, I miss our HOME! I just want this nightmare to be done with. I’m just so.. tired..

…

Papa told me they at least gave him the chance to make a grave for you and to say his goodbyes. I should’ve been there with him saying them together.

He just looks so defeated and sad. I insisted to him that we at least put together a funeral service for you so the rest of us can say our peace.

…

It was nice.

Uncle Mikey and Bao combined their powers to transform the room into a beautiful recreation of a lush meadow full of butterflies and yellow daffodils while Mr. Tello played some lovely music he still had saved recorded in his tech. It was so tranquil it almost makes you forget for a second you’re in an apocalyptic hell scape.

I think you would've loved it.

…

…

Talk to you again soon and happy birthday you numbskull. I love you.

I miss you..

[irithylldancer]

Messmer and Melina are the bookends to Marika's family. Her family begins and ends with a vision of fire.

Just something I've been thinking about today. It's taken me a while to come up with a satisfactory narrative for Messmer's origins and I don't think I would have come to any conclusions if I didn't think on the origins of Melina. Some scattered thoughts from me and others can be found in this thread here. Also some extra context for this theory: I don't think Marika was ever put into the jar and I think Radagon was always a part of Marika, not a separate person who then joined with her.

I want to preface by saying that I think the Gloam Eyed Queen is a foil to Marika. There isn't much info in the game about her and she remains quite mysterious. They're both Empyreans chosen by the fingers and possibly, also born influenced by fire. To what extent, I couldn't really say for sure unless I go into super speculative town. We know GEQ harnessed the power of Destined Death via fire, giving the ability to her apostle children; and Marika passes on the affinity for fire to Messmer and Melina. I think it's something that's passed down genetically (idk another word to describe it lol) and not them being influenced directly by outside forces (like Malenia and Miquella) because of Radagon also naturally having that red hair. As a divestment of Marika, he took on that property. Essentially, GEQ embraced her fire while Marika smothered hers.

Malenia and Millicent's characters helped give me a lot of answers to questions. We know from completing Millicent's questline that she was born when Malenia bloomed her scarlet rot. An action that was most likely very a intense emotional and physical pressure (a reference to a crucible? heavy emotions and bodily stress strained to make new life akin to smelting?). Another huge clue was looking through the various statues of Marika. They help give us a decent view of the timeline.

The headless one is kind we find in the Land of Shadow. Middle is Marika holding baby Messmer from his boss arena (from kitetales on YT), and the last one is the kind we find around the Lands Between. Judging from the length of her hair, we can start to piece some info together. The story trailer for Shadow of the Erdtree and the Hornsent Grandame mention Marika's betrayal. I think they were the ones who constructed those churches around the land. As an Empyrean, a vessel, they saw the potential for her to become their new living god. It's why I don't think Marika was ever put into the jar. She was already a living jar in their eyes.

Then we have this snapshot from the story trailer. Her hair is much longer than the statues depicted in the LoS. What's also interesting is how she's dressed. It's not her typical attire, but something very similar to what Radagon wears. In this moment, if we assume that Radagon's persona has come into existence and they share the same body, her ascension didn't happen alone. If we reference back to Malenia and Millicent's creation, Markia becoming a vessel for the Elden Ring would also count as intense emotional and physical pressure, off shooting new life in the form of Messmer. If this is the case, he is technically the son of Marika and Radagon. Radagon's mix into this off shooting of Messmer is what classifies him as their child, earning him a butterfly. His birth would have been incredibly special if it happened in that moment and why I think Messmer was given so many blessings and love. Why he was the 'chosen one' for her crusade. Now looking to the statue of Marika holding baby Messmer, her second braid has been cut (it's hard to tell from the photo, but kitetales does rotate the statue in a video and the braid is gone). That cut braid we find later in the Shaman Village as the Golden Braid talisman, an offering she leaves before veiling the LoS.

As for Melina (also butterfly baby), we know for sure that Marika and Radagon had converged back together because I think she was born as a result of shattering the Elden Ring. Another moment of extreme emotional and physical pressure. Melina tells you she was born at the foot of the Erd Tree and that her purpose was given to her by her mother from inside of it. Anything she remembers revolves around the Erd Tree. And since most fans agree that Marika is influencing the guidance of grace, it's also possible she was able to convey Melina's purpose to her while crucified inside the Tree. I won't go too into detail about Melina as a person since I've discussed it in another thread, but we can reference Millicent as her parallel. Offshoots of divine beings, not raised by their mothers, but they feel this compulsion to complete a journey and fulfill a purpose. In the end, they both regain some memories and find their autonomy as their own persons.

Ending this really long post by bringing up Law of Regression.

The fundamentalists describe the Golden Order through the powers of regression and causality. Regression is the pull of meaning; that all things yearn eternally to converge.

I think this sum up Messmer's, Melina's, and Millicent's narratives really well. Despite having no memories, Melina and Millicent feel this pull. A force of yearning to return to their mothers in some way because they are fragments of them. And I think Messmer feels this pull too, but he knows he can never make his journey home.

[misscinnamonroll16]

Brozone diner headcanons. None of this is canon for @bzjohndory 's au, just my personal ones

Clay and Floyd make the joke of 'doing coke' with powdered sugar and/or salt. Make little lines and pretend to snort it

The walls in the walk-in have dents in them from each of the boys punching them in frustration or anger. Most of them are from John and Bruce

When it's slow, Bruce and Clay make up their own menu items. If it's really good and John likes it, he'll put it on the menu

They don't have a designated break room, it's usually just the booth in the back corner where nobody ever sits

Each of the boys have fallen on the job with plates or glasses in their hands. Luckily nobody was seriously hurt, just a few tiny scraps or cuts

Clay and Floyd have competitions of who can make the worst milkshake. John Dory (much to his own dismay) is the judge because he'll eat pretty much anything they give him

Clay, Floyd and Branch often throw things at each other through the server window.

JD can cook circles around Bruce and Clay. He taught them how to cook and he has more experience than they do.

They take turns of who controls the music in the back of the house. The front of the house is some generic pop CD that plays over and over again

John's order slips are almost impossible to read. His handwriting is terrible especially when he's rushing

John has snatched each of his brothers phones out of their hands since they were on it when they weren't supposed to be. He'll take them into the office and lock the door since he's the only one with a key

Besides the dishes, each of them have a side work that they absolutely DESPISE. Usually they don't have what they hate bc they all kind of help each other but every so often they get it (even John)

They have a swear jar in the back because each of them swear sometimes. When it gets full, John usually uses it to buy lunch or something they've been asking for to use for the diner

[rhilumi]

autistic!Tim, freshly 18 years old, trying to do the whole public persona, big speech thing after getting officially inducted as CEO for wayne enterprises.

Full disclosure this is just Tim having a meltdown.

Everything feels like it's been dialled up to 110%, sweat is dripping through the impermeable barrier that the ten layers of deodorant were meant to be, the tuxedo is scratching and biting at Tim's skin and he is just barely keeping this in control. It's all locked up in a jar that must absolutely in no circumstances bother him. He's been through worse as Robin, as Red Robin, he's trained to ignore distractions. But, all the same, the chandelier is piercing it's way into his eyes, single handedly banging at his head.

With a deep breath, Tim attempts to recount the speech he had down pat the night before and finds he can't. The words fall short, decaying with each second that passes. Sweat drips down the back of his neck, doing nothing to cool down the hot lightheadedness.

Trembling, Tim begins to make his way to the bathrooms, desperate to at least wipe off some sweat. Heat rests on his shoulder as he reaches for the door, looking up he's met with the concerned eyes of an angel. Or, more accurately Bernard Dowd. The blonde puts an arm around him and says something that Tim hears but doesn't comprehend. Sure he said, "Are you okay?" but what does that mean? How does Tim respond to that?

Tears jerk out, only serving to add to the ringing swirl of light-heavy-hurt-ache. Prying open his eyes he hadn't even realised he'd screwed shut, revealed he was in the corner of an extravagant bathroom. Thankfully with ambient lighting that was just dark enough it didn't bore a hole directly through Tim's skull. The blonde - no his blonde boy is still talking, trying desperately to get through to Tim, the words ring and echo in his head but make no effort to stick.

Bernard shouldn't be here, he should be out enjoying the party, making good use of the champagne, judging the food. Not here, watching as Tim bawls over nothing.

"I'm sorry," Tim babbles, he was ruining everything, "'m sorry."

The pretty face in front of him departs after muttering something along the lines of there being nothing to be sorry about (A blatant lie, Tim was being pathetic - he isn't meant to act so childish, throwing a tantrum over nothing).

Coldness breaks through some of the mist, as a cool glass is placed against his lips. The temperature takes his mind into reality for him long enough to hear a command to drink. So, drink he does, starting with a sip. A singular sip awakens him, he feels as if he hasn't drunk in years, as if he's crawling over the desert like a lost traveller. Like an omen to the traveller, a voice registers in his head.

"C'mon, In, two, three, four, you're doing so well," following the instructions, Tim struggles to take a shaky breath in, "hold, two three four. Out, two, three, four. Doesn't that feel better." A shaky nod

"Let's go again," the process repeats until Tim notices where the guidance is coming from. Once more, the mist dissipates. And again, the shaking is reduced, he chokes out one last sob.

Watery blue locks with shining brown, with a trembling sigh, Tim rests his head on Bernard's chest, the blonde boy's arms following suit.

"We can stay here as long as you need, we can leave if you want," hastily, Tim shakes his head. He needs to do this.

"I love you. So much," is all Tim responds.

[mikimakiboo]

Tiny Steps Forward

More of bitty Nightmare :)

Previous part (and first one)

Nightmare is slowly getting used to the gang !

Short part, but I wanted to do a little something since ya'll seemed to like the first part :')

And if you like angst with a happy ending, you can check out You Will Be Fine, Now, which is unrelated to these parts but is focused on bitty Nightmare too !

Nightmare sat on top of the chimney, watching Killer assemble the planches, he was building him a tiny house next to the fireplace with a cat bed next to it if Nightmare wanted to take a nap outside the house. It was his second day here, having fallen asleep in Killer's hood when he was showing him around, he woke up the next morning, on the couch and still in the hood, but without Killer.

Horror had been the first he saw as he was the only one awake. They had looked at each other before Horror hesitantly waved. It seemed like they were both as confused as each other regarding the current situation.

- You... hungry... ?

Horror had asked. Nightmare slowly nodded, he hadn't eaten since at least twenty-four hours as Killer and he had left the shelter before lunch time, and his little cube of ham was merely a snack, not a meal. The bitty got up, but quickly realized that the couch was to high for him to jump from it. He looked up at the big skeleton. He was scary, but then again, it would be hypocritical to judge him based on how he looked, so Nightmare took a deep breath and held his tiny arms out for him. Horror looked at him for a minute, wondering what he wanted, before getting closer and carefully scooping the bitty in his hand, which was much bigger than Killer's. Nightmare curled his tentacles around the fingers for balance and sat on the palm as Horror straightened up, having bent down to grab him, he looked at the living room, seeing it much better with the new height. There were a big couch and an armchair in front of a fireplace with a TV sitting on it, a coffee table between the couch and chair, and on the right of all of that was a wooden dinning table with chairs.

Horror took him to the kitchen, putting his hand on the counter for the bitty to get down at his own speed. Nightmare stood on the marble counter, looking at the knives and pans hanging on the wall, he heard Horror going through the cabinets to gather some ingredients.

- Killer said... bitty food... for you...

Nightmare turned to him and nodded, he wondered if the big skeleton had trouble speaking ? At first he thought he was just unsure about interacting with him, but it seemed like there was something else... Horror grabbed a box, the one Nightmare thought contained material to kill and cook him, looked through it, and grabbed another smaller box with picture of different ingredients on it. He put it with the other ingredients already on the counter.

- What are you doing ?

Nightmare asked, quite curious about all of that. Horror moved his hands in the air, but all he earned from it was a confused look from the bitty. The big skeleton frowned, thinking for a bit before finding the right word.

- Cookies..

- Why do you speak like that ?

Maybe it was a bit rude to ask this like that, but Nightmare wanted to know.

- Dust said... aphasia... can't find... words..

Horror replied slowly, trying not to mess up his sentence too much.

- Was that sign language when you moved your hands ?

Horror nodded. Nightmare didn't understand sign language, he knew what it was because he had seen customers using it at the shelter, but he was never taught this language.

- Easier like that...

The big skeleton added before focusing on his ingredients and grabbing two bowls, one big and one smaller. Nightmare got closer and climbed on a small jar to sit and watch Horror cook. He let the bigger one prepare the cookie dough, using regular ingredients in the big bowl and special bitty ones in the other. Once the dough was done he took a hob and started separating the dough to shape the cookies on it. Nightmare jumped a bit when Horror pushed the little bowl near him and put the special dough in front of him. The skeleton didn't say anything, watching the bitty expectantly. Nightmare hesitated for a while before finally getting down from the jar, rolling up the sleeves of his sweater, and slowly detaching parts of the dough to make his own little cookies, glancing at Horror to make sure he wasn't doing anything wrong.

He had never cooked before, nor did he ever watch anybody cook, it was new but.. he liked that, he liked shaping his little cookies next to the big cookies.. he had liked sleeping in Killer's jacket too... he felt his tentacles curl, reflecting his.. his happiness.. he was happy..

- Heyyyy big guy ! Whatcha making ? Ohh little guy's here too !

Speaking of Killer, he just arrived in the kitchen. Nightmare didn't pay much attention to him, too focused on his cookies that he shaped slowly, carefully... He just heard Killer speaking, Horror didn't talk so Nightmare figured he might have been signing instead, then he heard the same noise as when they left the shelter, and Killer was gone when he looked up. Horror was still there, waiting patiently for him to finish.

Nightmare stood up after a few minutes, finally done and rather proud of his work. He looked up at Horror, wanting to see if he was proud too, but quickly looked back down. Why was he so.. so childish all of a sudden ? He never seeked validation like that before ! Or at least not since the first year in the shelter, when he still had hope.. what was happening ? Horror smiled at him, giving him a small and careful pat on the head before taking the hob back and putting it in the oven. He then went back to Nightmare, carefully scooped him back up, and went back to the living room where Dust was now laying on the couch, apparently finishing his night downstairs. Horror put Nightmare on top of the chimney and that's when he realized Killer was kneeling on the ground, assembling planches.

So Nightmare stayed on the chimney, watching Killer work and Dust, who had woken up, comment on his work, telling him where to put some pieces. He watched them both from his spot, finding them not so scary after all...

Horror came back a few minutes later, putting a tray on the table.

- Cookies ready..

He announced. Killer looked up excitedly, abandonned his work to stand up and scooped Nightmare to go to the table with him, putting him on the middle of it for him to chose his seat. Dust followed them and sat on his assigned chair.

The cookies smelled amazing ! Nightmare looked at the mountain before him before spotting his own, smaller, cookies and taking one. He saw Horror signed something and Killer smiling happily. He really needed to learn sign language.

Everyone sat down, talking as they all enjoyed a nice breakfast with warm cookies. Nightmare looked at them, were they his family ? His caretakers ? His owners ? His roommates ? He didn't really know how he should address them, but did it really matter now ? He'll probably just figure it out later.

He looked at Dust, he hadn't said a word, simply nodding along to whatever was being said, or signed, the shadow of his hood covering his face. He was the one who told Nightmare that Killer brought him here out of pity, that they all were unwanted. Nightmare couldn't really feel his emotions, there was a sort of mist surrounding his soul, and Nightmare's magic wasn't really powerful anyway. He jumped when he noticed a red and blue eyelight staring at him. Was he mad ? Did Nightmare stare too much ? Maybe he shouldn't have, it was rude to stare after all...

Dust's eyelight finally turned when Killer playfully hit his shoulder.

- Stop scaring my baby !

Nightmare felt his cheeks getting hotter, was Killer talking about him ? Why did he call him his baby ? He didn't have time to think about it as Killer had grabbed him to pull him closer.

- It's okay baby, I'll protect you.

Killer assured as Dust rolled his eyelights, biting into a cookie. This time Nightmare was sure he was blushing as he looked down, biting into his own cookie to distract himself from the nickname. No one has ever called him "baby" before, sometimes the employee at the shelter would call him "Night", but it was that, never "baby" or "little guy" like Killer did. He didn't really know how to feel about that.

He felt a pat on his head, looking up he saw Killer smiling at him, a loving smile, but Nightmare could see the mischief behind it... he opened his mouth to ask what he was up to but only a surprised shriek and a giggle came out when he felt a finger tickle his side. The hand was rapidly slapped and chased off by his tentacles, making Killer chuckle as he looked at the bitty fleeing to Horror for protection, looking very embarrassed.

- I'm sorry I couldn't resist.. ~

Killer smiled, to which Nightmare responded with a frown before turning his back to him, his tentacles curling in embarrassment.

Killer was a threat, Nightmare would have to watch him closely from now on. For now he would stay with Horror, he was much more safe to be around, and Dust... was still a little intimidating. He'll get used to him later.

And later arrived very shortly after because Nightmare was now alone with Dust, Horror had left to work in the garden and Killer went to the store because he was missing materials, so Nightmare was sitting on one of the couch's pillows next to Dust who was busy being on his phone, not paying attention to him.

The silence was loud. He looked at the big skeleton but couldn't see his face behind the hood as he was turned. Nightmare bent over, trying to at least see his eyelights, but he was still too far. He bent farther down, he just needed a little more, just a little... until he felt the air under him and everything shifted as he felt himself fall, having bent too far. He didn't have time to react, all he did was close his eye as his soul beat faster, waiting for the inevitable impact with the hard ground... the impact didn't come. He slowly opened his eye, three of his tentacles were rolled up around him as he was shaking like a leaf, curled in a ball. He felt something tug on his fourth tentacle and he was slowly lifted in the air before being put down on the pillow again, safe. He looked up, Dust didn't move, but he saw a little bit of purple magic around his fingers.

He saved him. He was going to fall and he saved him. Nightmare stood up after calming down from the fright of his near death experience, his legs still shaking a little, and slowly walked to Dust, sitting next to him.

- You should be more careful.

Dust said without looking up from his phone. Nightmare nodded, looking at the skeleton before tugging on his shorts, wanting to sit on his leg. Dust saved him, that was.. a lot, and Nightmare immediately felt a lot safer with him.

Dust turned his head, his eyelight locking on the bitty trying to climb up his leg. He watched him for a second before putting his hand under the little skeleton's feet to help him in his ascent. Once on his lap Nightmare went to sit against his hip, not saying a word, his little tentacles were curling on themselves. Dust didn't mind, returning his attention to his phone, he decided to put on a movie for them both to watch, he didn't have anything better to do anyway, Horror was outside and Killer was in town, it was only him and the bitty who now seemed to really like him, which was curious considering he was scared of him not five minutes ago, but then again Dust didn't know anything about bitties, so maybe that was just how they were ? The only thing he knew was that bitties needed love to live a healthy life, hence why they were sociable and a domestic species only, which was a result of the excessive breeding they went through. Considering that, it was surprising that Nightmare survived this long in the shelter. Dust first thought that he was special, that he didn't need love as much as the others, but he was apparently wrong judging by the way he was pressed against him, it just took longer for him to show it, and maybe he was just more resistant than regular bitties.

Either way, this little bitty was intriguing, and both Horror and Killer seemed to like him, so he'll give him a chance, and maybe he would like him too, who knows ? Maybe he would grow found of this little guy falling asleep on his leg...

Maybe...