#hes flawed but he genuinely loves his sons

[celestiamour]

‧₊˚✧ ❛[ bad liar ]❜

━━━ .°˖✧ requested by @gothic-rat112 (lost the ask...) ˚₊ ⊹

ft. seong gi-hun x f! reader — squid game

╰₊✧ how he is when jealous & insecure┊1.2k words 

setting: season 1 contains: age gap relationship (unspecified but legal obviously), insecurity & jealousy, he’s a little immature & broke as hell but it’s okay i love pathetic men, reader is a sweetheart, this is all over the place omfg

➤ author's note: okay i kinda went on a tangent, first season because i miss his stupid smile and his fluffy hair (also look at how cute he is in this gif omfg i love him sm, i need to write for him more, underrated in his own show, THE PUPPY EYES)

╰₊✧ honestly, gi-hun isn’t so much as jealous as he is insecure. sure, he has an outgoing personality and always makes you laugh without fail, but he can’t think of any other positive traits aside from that. he doesn’t think of himself as particularly attractive with his scruffy appearance, and he’s painfully aware that he’s lacking when it comes to finances and has a gambling problem to boot. on top of all that, he was a divorced middle-aged man who didn’t even have joint custody of his only daughter and still lived with his mom rent-free, a terrible husband, father, and son— he’s truthfully the type of man people avoid when dating.

╰₊✧ yet he still managed to pull a pretty young thing like you who looks past all that, not sure if you were stupid or desperate. during the first few weeks of being together, he made jokes about still being able to date younger women in his old age because he was still in disbelief it was happening, but when you stuck by his side through all his flaws and the first year passed with you supporting him to get better, insecurity hit him like a ton of bricks when he realized that he was genuinely in love with you and that he didn’t have what it took to be the boyfriend you deserved when he wasn’t even someone his biological family deserved. 

╰₊✧ he sees other people buying their girls jewelry and clothing from name-brand stores, taking them out to eat in luxury restaurants with multiple courses, driving them around in european cars, and he’s out here saving money to do something as little as cake for your anniversary. he’s always on cloud nine when he spends time with you, but there’s something so humbling about looking up “broke date ideas” and scraping together what he already has to make it more special. no matter how much things like that don’t matter to you with the mindset of the intention counting more than the price, he still feels shitty about having you pay for most of the things you do together when he’s the man and the older one in the relationship along with the fact that you were barely better off than he was. 

walks around to admire the sights: especially during holiday seasons when there are pretty lights, you like holding his hand and admiring the sights of the city you often take for granted. if the streets are empty then he doesn’t mind it, but he does get self-conscious about the looks you both get so it’s not super common.

candlelit dinners of takeout and beer: a regular one, gi-hun likes to gather a bunch of candles to make the place look a little more romantic, maybe even having some roses to make it look nicer. the man doesn’t cook much though, so you’ll just have replated takeout with bottles of beer, but he always makes it lively with conversation and puts effort into fixing his hair to look more handsome.

and anything else he can think of, he can be really creative when it comes to you and you’re pleasantly surprised each time.

╰₊✧ these things bother him a lot more than he will let on, but he tries to stay all smiles around you which you see right through like glass. he’s a bad liar, a trait he would always get in trouble for when he was a child since he couldn’t lie about his antics.

╰₊✧ he feels awful when he finds that you also entered these games to pay off your respective debts, because no matter how much you try to convince him you aren’t, he knows that you intended to use any extra money to help him out as well with his debt being higher than yours. it should be the other way around, he should be the one helping you, and when the first shots are fired during “red light, green light,” he makes you swear that you won’t come back.

╰₊✧ of course, you do come back, because while he is your boyfriend, you’re also a grown-ass woman who can do what she pleases (also because you’re desperate and prefer not to find out what those loan sharks would do to you if it took too long to pay them back, and you might as well go to support gi-hun because you know his ass went back).

╰₊✧ he feels a little bit better about himself seeing all of the other people in a similar position as him, drowning in debt and petrified of death. he tries to be protective over you, but let’s be honest, you’re the protective one who mothers him, and since the constant threat of death is always looming, he lets you do it even if it looks stupid. people are either judgemental or jealous, but there are bigger things to worry about.

“people are staring…” he muttered, his eyes darting around to meet theirs and watching as they looked away the second eye contact was made. “you don’t need to do this, you know, it’s a little embarrassing.”

“i don’t care, let them stare,” you stated simply, rubbing into the back of his shoulders with practiced circular motions. “they are just jealous that they don’t have a cute girlfriend to take care of them like you do, and i want to! your muscles are so tense— i don’t want you participating in the next games when you aren’t in the best shape. we could die any day here, i want to give you all the love i can!”

╰₊✧ jealous of sang-woo with his intelligence and emotional security. even if both of them are wearing the same teal tracksuit, his childhood friend was in here because of failed investments which sounded a lot better than just losing constant bets in gambling dens. (to be fair, if you were gi-hun’s controversially young girlfriend, i don’t think either of you would get along well as he probably looks down on you and you probably find him stuck up, so he doesn’t have to worry about you being stolen away by him). not really jealous of that block-head deok-su hitting on you, after the little altercation they had on the first day, more annoyed than anything but the feeling quickly vanishes when he sees you reject him with a roll of your eyes. 

╰₊✧ actually jealous of anyone your age paying attention to you, especially ali who has a really sweet personality and gets along with you really well, maybe even sae-byeok who has a pretty face and is decently nice once you get to know her. 

“you need to stop pouting.”

“‘m not pouting…”

“you’re a bad liar, you know that? but it’s so cute,” you exclaimed, reaching out to pinch his cheeks childishly. “you don’t need to be jealous of ali, he’s already married and has a kid.”

“i know, i know…”

“i don’t think you do.”

╰₊✧ it’s so obvious when he’s jealous, it’s actually painful. he stares holes into the head of the person talking to you and is pouty until you address it. he’ll also blush when you call him out and tease him about it, it’s so cute. please give him assurance, pinch his cheeks, ruffle his fluffy hair, and give him lots of kisses, he deserves it.

(author is slightly delirious with a fever, i took medicine dw, i just really wanna kiss gihun)

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

The Sticking Point 6

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon, possible violence, illness, death, bullying, ableism, and other elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You are sent in the place of your ailing sister to marry a stranger. (Regency AU)

Character: Loki

Note: I'm so tireddddd.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me 💞

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you all. Take care. 💖

You might be keenly aware of your circumstance, off all the flaws in yourself and your surroundings, and of the uncertainty you walk towards. Still, you must confess that Frigga’s best efforts have not all been for not. Despite all fears, all your doubts, you feel closer to adequate than you ever have. 

You hair is tamed beneath the feather pin and the lace gloves are a lovely addition. You emerge proudly, setting your shoulders and your courage for what comes next. As you reach the top of the stairs, you are struck by the first blows of the battle. Voices. Odin and Loki, just below. 

You look down briefly. You see them there, waiting. Frigga keeps her arm hooked in yours and urges you down, step by step. Silence rises as only your short heels tap beneath you. You don’t glance at your betrothed and see the disapproval in his eyes but you know he is watching. 

“Ladies,” Odin nears as you come to the bottom, “you both are exquisite.”  

He kisses Frigga’s hand, then your own. No one’s ever treated you as such, not so genuinely. Manners and etiquette rule all but you can see through the empty gestures. You dip your head and bend your knees slightly in deference. 

“My lawd, thank you,” you say. 

You might compliment him in turn if you weren’t sure he’d take it as some egregious affront. As ever, he is refined down to aa single hair. Your betrothed is handsome from without but inside, you know him to be a snake coiling. 

“Yes, a fine prize for any man,” he keeps hold of your hand and guides you toward his son. You can feel the reluctance roiling off of Lord Laufeyson. He sniffs and offers his arm nonetheless. “Isn’t she immaculate, son?” 

His response comes through a taut throat, “so she is.” 

Odin tuts and backs away. “My wife, please, it’s been too long since I’ve been able to parade you around, show all of my fortune.” 

The elder lord takes his wife by her arm and sweeps toward the doors as two servants pull them open. Loki’s arm is rigid against you, held so that he touches you as little as possible. You keep your head high and fall into pace with him as he follows his father. 

Out of courtesy, only that which is expected, never genuine, he assists you into the carriage. You climb up and maneuver to sit on the bench. Odin and Frigga sit closely, content as they wait patiently. Loki’s weight shifts the compartment as he bows through the door and sits against the wall. Far from you. 

You turn your attention to the window as your husband-to-be thumps on the roof with his fist. The wheels roll forward and slowly build to a canter. The horses’ hooves stave off the silence enough for you to maintain composure. 

You see the manor ahead of you as you approach. It’s lit up with lanterns hung on tall polls. The gates are open to visitors as the driver follows another carriage up the lane way. 

As the wheels come to a halt, the door opens from the other side. A footman greets Odin as he emerges first, Frigga right behind him. You wait for Loki to lead the way and he does without hesitation. You step down beside him and peer over at him. 

He is nothing less than dashing in black and silver. He has that bearing which can never look anything less than stringent. He is unbending but not unbothered. You are aware of his callous spite wrought into a withering silence. 

He proceeds forward and you follow at his side. He does not offer his arm. You don’t expect that much. 

The foyer of the grand manor house has you in awe. Pristine ivory and draped azure, mother of pearl and silver, velvet and marble. You admire it all as you clasp your hands tightly. 

“Lord Odinson,” a tall woman in elegant lilac silver breezes forward, her skirts fluttering like a butterfly, “it is so pleasant to see you again.” 

“Lady Kyrington, it is an honour, as ever,” Odin takes her hand and bows his head. 

“My lady,” the hostess greet Frigga with a courteous dip of her chin. “And your sons?” 

“We’ve brought the younger, I’m afraid the elder is tending to his wife, expecting as she is,” Frigga explains. 

“Ah, Laufeyson,” Lady Kyrington swirls around the esteemed couple, “it is so unlike you to hide away. I hadn’t even noticed you there.” 

He stiffly unhooks his arm from yours and parts. He greets her with a deep bow, “my lady, so wonderful to have received your invitation.” 

You keep your straight, steeling yourself against his congenial tone. You never received that grace from him. Yet here is this woman with her elegant dark coif and bright blue eyes and she is treated as if she is queen. You hardly expect as much but a bit of humanity wouldn’t be unwelcome. 

“And you’ve brought your betrothed. I did hear she arrived.” She turns to you with a pretty smile. “Oh, what a unique colour you’ve chosen. Rustic.” 

“Thank you, my lady,” you say carefully. “And you... look splendid.” 

Laufeyson shifts, noting your choice of words. No Rs to underline your defect.  

“I must offer my condolences,” Kyrington takes your hands in hers; smooth satin brushing over your lace-sheathed fingers. “I heard of your sister. It cannot be easy to brave so much change at once, but let us hope this deep loss gives way to a wonderful prize. I know you and Lord Laufeyson should be most happy at Jade Gardens.” 

“Thank you vewy much,” you forget yourself and immediately blanch. You let her go and lower your hands to clasp over your bodice. Laufeyson’s sole scuffs and he sighs. 

“Ah...” Kyrington tilts her head coyly, “wonderful. I do hope you mingle and acquaint yourself well. We are all terribly excited to meet Laufeyson’s future wife. Never thought we’d see that day.” 

“Yes, my lady, again, many thanks,” you hold your chin high. 

“Yes, let us not impinge upon your welcoming the rest of your guests,” Laufeyson gestures you away. 

He keeps his distance as you step through the grand archway with its carved framed and peer out upon the party. Ladies in fine fabrics sip from stemmed glasses and gentleman toy with monocles and jacket buttons as they speak hushedly of sport or finance. Lord Odin and Lady Frigga have plunged into the fray. 

You glance over at Laufeyson. He huffs and struts away from you without acknowledgement. Your heart sinks. Here, he can lose you in the masses. He can simply excuse himself that he lost you amid the social furor. 

You are on your own. You rest your hand upon your reticule, hooked around your wrist. Ester’s pin is nestled there, to bring you her courage. She would not want you to wilt away. She always did mourn when the daffodils she picked began to droop. 

Your chest racks tightly and you exhale through the wave of terror. You haven’t any idea what to do. How should you approach any when it is upon Laufeyson to introduce you. He has abandoned you. You expect it won’t be the last time. 

You wade into the chamber. You stay near to the wall but not so close that you might appear mousy. You catch an eye over a painted fan and another from beneath a hat brim. You search for any hint of your escort. He has expertly hidden himself amid the revelry. 

“Where ever did you find this shade of silk?” A tweet snares you in. “And the overlay, how keen.” 

You pause and face the speaker. A blond woman, willowy and decked in several jeweled necklaces. Her portrait neckline frames her bony shoulders as golden ringlets drape down her back. 

“Thank you, my lady,” you turn to her delicately, “my motha acquawed it in Hausten.” 

Her lashes flick as the other women at her shoulders share a look. You steel yourself for mockery. For so long as you’ve lived, you’ve received the same, but not from so many. There are dozens here prepared to degrade you.  

Be brave, for Ester. 

“Ah, and you hale from Hausten? I’ve never heard that accent though I’ve travelled there,” she challenges. 

“My fatha owns the vineyard in Kywi.” 

“Kywi?” She echoes and the other women titter behind their fans. 

“Ky-wi--” you try to force out the proper enunciation, then attempt to spell it. “K-y-aw-i.”  

“Hm,” she sniffs thoughtfully and peeks between the other women and shrugs. 

“I know Kyri,” a bold timbre intones as a man steps up. “I’ve been. The grapes there are like plums.” 

“Yes, my lawd, that is it,” you affirm. 

“I’ve not been in some time but I do have wine imported,” he drawls. “Lady Gertrude, your father is from the other side of Hausten, is he not?” 

“South of it,” the blonde curls her lip at you. 

“South, ah, it might explain the difference in etiquette,” he puts his attention to you, “typically we are kind to newcomers.” 

“I was not uncouth,” Lady Gertrude insists. “I couldn't understand her cadence.” 

“It was clear enough to me,” he girds. “Forgive me, lady, I expound propriety and I’ve not yet introduced myself. Lord Heimdall, my estate is in Bifrost. Have you heard of it?” 

“Ugh,” Lady Gertrude sends him a withering look which is unheeded. He bows his head and takes your hand in that courteous way gentlemen do and he pecks your knuckles. She stomps away with the other women in tow. 

“Don’t mind those sparrows,” Lord Heimdall says as he stands straight. He is near as tall as Laufeyson but broader in the shoulders. And his eyes, they are a peculiar shade of brown, so light they seem golden. “I thought to rescue you from their sharp tongues. They have a reputation for gossip.” 

“Oh, thank you, my lawd,” you squeeze your reticule anxiously. “It is kind.” You sway and look around. “You needn’t wemain. I’m saw you have otha social obligations.” 

“Yes, to socialize, as I am doing in this moment,” he insists. “You are Lord Laufeyson’s engaged, from Kyri. Your banns were read on Sunday.” 

“Yes, my lawd.” You avert your eyes, too embarrassed to look at him. “Twuly, I needn’t pity.” 

“Pity? Why?” 

“My lawd, do not toy with me. I can haw myself.” 

“Your words? No, they shouldn’t bother me. You are eloquently spoken, my lady.” 

Your eyes round as the flick to him. You consider him, trying to untie any thread of derision in his voice. 

“You are suspicious? I suspect others are not so accepting, but don’t let it fetter you. No matter who you are, they will find a reason to whisper,” he shrugs. “I’ve not yet seen your fiance. Is he not near?” 

You hold back a wince at the mention of Laufeyson. You swivel your head but do not see him amid the sea of caps and coifs. You muster a smile. 

“I suppose he is on the hunt faw a wefweshment,” you appease. 

“Is that so? I think, should I have a lady avowed to wed me, I might keep her close but I never did presume that all gentlemen hold the same priorities as I,” he harrumphs. “Perhaps, in claiming a refreshment for myself, I would see that she had one as well.” 

He gazes around the room and strides away confidently. He plucks two glasses from a servants’ tray with some murmured nicety. He comes back to you and offers you one. There is a dried orange in the wine and a sprig of mint. You thank him. 

“Yes, and I know you likely tire of the reminder, but I must issue my condolences. I hear Lady Ester was a very kind soul. I would see her sister is not much different.” 

Your eyes sting and you take a sip from the crystal. You nod and dab your lips with your knuckles. 

“She was... the best sista I could’ve asked faw.” 

“You must miss her terribly,” he nods. 

You stare at him, still wary. Yet, you find nothing but assurance in his stance, his gaze, his tone. He is entirely focused on you. He is the first person, aside from Ester, to ever pay heed to you. That does not treat you as some pest to be tolerated and nothing more. 

“I do,” you confess, “evewy second.” You take a breath as you tamp down your grief. 

“While it might feel a curse to mourn so deeply, it is truly a blessing for it is only that we had someone to love so succinctly that we feel their absence to our bones,” he says. “So you should not evade that pain, my lady, but embrace it as you would your sister should she were here. That hurt is her memory, it is her being, to remind you always that she remains close.” 

Your lashes flick and you gently touch the brim of your eyes, “my lawd.” 

“Forgive me for drawing it to the surface,” he says. “I would say let us talk of happy things but I see she is those happy things.” 

You press your lips together and dip your head, “she is, and I thank you, my lawd, for weminding me of that.” 

[purplepixel]

Rise splinter is my fav bc HE IS FLAWED. This is why he's the most interesting splinter to me. Unlike other iterations, hes not "the wise one" who always knows what's best. Not to throw shade at other splinters, I'm just saying he's more of a character in rise than just the mentor figure. And I love him for that. He arguably got the most character development in rise

No but like every time I think about Splinter and what he had to go through just to keep the boys alive, my heart hurts for him so badly. Is he perfect? No not at all, but none of them are and by god does he love his sons.

The fact that all of them are alive, and grew to thrive despite the circumstances surrounding them is a testament of how much Splinter loves his boys. He raised four babies following the most traumatic time of his life, all alone with nothing but the sewers to house them (to hide them.) I feel like he’s not given the credit he deserves for all he’s done.

And I get that it’s easy to hold up his flaws and faults when it comes to parenting, I myself like looking into them because flawed characters are super interesting and said flaws make them more realistic and engaging, but he tries, and again, so many others would have given up on the boys or failed along the way but Splinter didn’t.

He’s their father, for all his faults he did his damndest to make sure they survived.

[skyloftian-nutcase]

Hi? Is it okay to ask for Ganondorf's possible anxieties involving having a son?

I mean, it's highly unlikely that Ganon even saw another male until at least 18. Imagine what that would do to someone. No father, no male role model, no male friends, no male associates. No male contact at all.

Like, I can't even imagine what it would've been like to have had no female contact at all until 18.

Just not having a good father in one's life is known to stunt a person substantially. I can't even fathom how othered Ganon must've felt growing up. How utterly pressured he felt to become a pillar of masculinity without any real example to follow. No one to teach him what it actually means to be a good man. No one to explain things to him. No one to show him the subtle little things that seems to almost be universal among men no matter the culture. Especially in how they interact amongst each other. No one to teach him about comradery between men. About the unspoken rules that men seem to have.

And, not to mention the almost commodifying perspective the Gerudo have towards men. One even mentioned that she'd believed that all men were useless except for Ganondorf.

I can't help but think he might've internalized some of that.

So, would Ganon be anxious about setting a good example for his son seeing as he likely didn't have that himself?

Ganondorf had to admit he was still in shock over looking at his children. But the longer he stared at them, the more a new feeling settled into his heart.

Watching his daughter was a blessing; a strong feeling of protectiveness overcame him, and he wondered how such a delicate looking child could grow into a warrior like her mother. But his son…

Ganondorf could fathom having a daughter, could handle raising a girl. But a son…

He’d never felt so simultaneously out-of-depth and excited.

It wasn’t particularly a feeling he enjoyed. Ganondorf despised being out of control. But looking at the little boy made him feel so utterly alone and adrift, wondering how in the world he could possibly raise this child correctly. Yet at the same time, it filled him with eagerness, an excitement to give the boy guidance that he had been sorely lacking in his life.

Growing up as a Gerudo male had been so incredibly isolating. Ganondorf had been treated as a king and as some Other, his childhood filled with voids and gaps in understanding, in confusion that had left him stumbling when he’d first entered Hyrule. He’d never felt unwelcome by his fellow Gerudo, but he’d also never felt welcome. His presence was a blessing, a symbol of leadership with no understanding of what that even meant. Somehow it was his responsibility to lead his band of thieves, and the best way he knew how was to be the strongest. His physicality lent to it naturally, so it only seemed the correct path. But when he’d first entered Hyrule, when he’d first seen another man, he had felt wholly inadequate. It had been a group of Hylian soldiers, all strong in their own right, laughing amongst each other, at ease, normal.

He wasn’t normal. He’d never been normal. His body had been strange and cursed, developing in ways no other Gerudo’s had, lacking the gift of life that the women bore, making up for it in sheer power and aggression. It had been his goddess-given right to be a protector, and that had developed into a greater desire when he’d seen Hyrule.

He didn’t have to defend. He could just take as his sisters did, but with greater results. He could live in a land that prospered, he could rule it, as was his birthright.

But all of those thoughts felt empty when looking at his son, because here he held a new gift and opportunity. He could be a father. He could raise a boy to be a man, could show him what that meant when he’d never had that chance.

But what could he possibly do in this role? He knew nothing of fathers, even in his journeys to Hyrule. The closest he’d gotten to interacting with a father was seeing the king, who occasionally was present with the princess, but mostly the girl was elsewhere in the palace. Was being a father not that involved, then, or was it simply because the king of Hyrule had other duties? Ganondorf surely wouldn’t abandon his children nearly so much. They could attend duties with him. How else could they learn to fulfill their roles, anyway?

Was that the correct course of action? Twinrova had done as much with Ganondorf, so it seemed reasonable. He’d been involved in the care and leadership of his people since he was a teenager, perhaps even a little younger.

The worst part of this was that he had no one to turn to for this. Ganondorf hated relying on anything or anyone else but himself, but in this matter… he… almost wished he did have someone. Nabooru, as much as he loved her, was not going to be helpful in this matter. However, in this land that Din had taken him to, the Gerudo here did have a very small amount of men present in their ranks – only those who joined with Gerudo women were allowed. Men from a nearby settlement occasionally interacted with Gerudo, and those who chose to embrace the culture and marry one of the women were allowed. But they were foreigners, and Ganondorf was their ruler through his own birthright and his marriage to Nabooru. He refused to look to them for an example.

Ganondorf took a steadying breath, lifting the child into his arms. It didn’t matter if he had an example or not. He’d forged his own way his entire life, and that wasn’t changing now. He would be a father to these children whether he was ready or not, and so he would strive to be the best father he could be, whatever that meant.

[reidgenius]

Low Pain Tolerance | S.R. x Reader

image by reidgif <3

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader Word Count: 1.4k Category: angst, hurt/comfort? Warnings: commitment issues, wildly insecure!reader (it's really just me) A/N: I haven't written for Spencer before, so please excuse any OOC inaccuracies and be nice okay! I am a long-time lurker/admirer of the lovely @pathologicalreid and am writing this for her cutesy margovember event :) Song Inspo: Low Pain Tolerance by Abby Holliday

You never enjoyed running.

Still, that didn't stop you from doing it often. Whether it be on the job or in a relationship, you ran.

To catch a bad guy. To catch yourself before you fall. To stop something terrible before it happens... You ran.

In this instance, you found yourself running from Spencer Reid.

"Would you look at me? Please?" he pleaded.

You knew if you were to turn around that you'd see his glassy doe eyes and be drawn right back in. You knew your weaknesses, and he was certainly one of them. The biggest one. That's why you stayed put, staring at his bedroom wall.

"I can't, Spence." You meant to say it with finality, but it came out more as a whimper.

"You can't look at me, or you can't-"

"Neither. Both."

As the holidays approached, Spencer had mentioned the idea of the two of you making a trip out to Vegas. "Just for a day or two," he'd promised. Though there wasn't much he treasured about home, you knew that his mother was there, and that was more than reason enough.

This evening, he'd brought it up again after letting you avoid the topic for weeks.

"It's only a matter of time before you figure it out," you admit.

"Figure what out?"

"God, Spence, that I'm only bringing you down!" you nearly shouted, though you hadn't meant to. The anxiety took over. "I'm like... gahhh! I don't know how to do any of this, I-"

To your dismay, he let out a laugh as you finally turned to face him. A real, genuine laugh.

"Bringing me down?" He looked at you with an earnest amusement. "Honey, I don't think you realize what you-"

"I'm scared. Okay? Is that what you wanted me to admit? That I'm scared of meeting her?" A single tear gushed down your cheek.

His brows knit in concern as he quickly thought of ways to disprove the common fears surrounding schizophrenia and it's manifestations.

"Baby, schizophrenia doesn't ma-"

"Dammit Spencer, it's not about that! It's- I..."

You found yourself stumbling over your words.

"I don't care about her diagnoses!" you laughed. (Of course, you did care, but that wasn't what was scaring you.) "I'm scared of this!" you said, waving your hands between the two of you. "I don't want to rush it. I don't want to get her hopes up..."

You let your legs give way to sit on the floor against the wall, your head in your hands, mumbling to the cold hardwood.

"I don't want to get my hopes up."

There was it. That was the truth.

You weren't used to it. You weren't used to someone asking you how your day was and really caring. You weren't used to the notion that a man would want to wrap himself around you at night and keep you close. You'd never been one to draw much attention from men. Or women. Or anyone, really.

Naturally, you figured that there must be something deeply and inherently flawed in you. Something Spencer had yet to discover.

So, being with him was... terrifying. You were constantly waiting and wondering when he'd conclude that you weren't as pretty as he initially thought, or as witty, or as intelligent, or kind, or...

And it would only be cruel to drag Diana into this. To have her think that perhaps her son had found his person. To have her thinking that she might be meeting her future daughter-in-law. It felt cruel to yourself, in some twisted way, to pretend that this was all going to last.

Spencer was typically a fast thinker, but your admission had the cogs in his brain working overtime. You were afraid of him? Of your relationship?

He padded over to join you on the floor, keeping a little distance so as not to scare you.

"Get your hopes up? You don't-" he gulped, "I mean... you don't think we're gonna- that this is gonna work out?"

Still speaking to the floor, you sigh, "I don't know, Spence."

You were exhausted. Incessantly feeling like you're on the brink of being "found out" can do that to a person. It's not that Spencer hadn't done all the right things. No, he was the perfect partner. But therein lied the issue. He was perfect. And, in your opinion, you were far, far from it.

You took a deep breath through your tears.

"I don't think I can keep doing this."

Confusion. Utter shock. Things had been going so well with you the past 8 months. Spencer immediately began to wrack his brain combing through all the possible mistakes he could've made. Did he raise his voice with you? Had he forgotten some big milestone? Was he not giving you enough?

"Honey I-" he gathered himself, placing a hand on your thigh, "I'm so sorry. Can I ask... what makes you say all this?"

Though you were reluctant, you figured that now was as good a time as any.

"Spencer. I am not good for you! Good enough for you!" With each point, you illustrated by raising a finger, "I am impulsive and I complain and I get weird sometimes when you touch me and I can be a massive bitch and I never know how to-"

"Woah, woah, woah-" He snuck up closer to you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and placing his head atop yours, all while you kept rambling. "Why in the world do you say that? Not good enough for me? If anything it's me who isn't deserving of you..."

"No, you-"

He stopped you in your tracks just by saying your name in that beautiful way he does. Like its covered in honey and dripping with admiration.

"You are everything. You may think those things about yourself but I certainly don't." His thumb caressed your bare skin so carefully as he continued, speaking slowly so as to allow the words to really sink in. "You are the most generous person I've ever encountered. You care so deeply about people you love. You are courageous and willing to try all the weird foods I suggest even though you really don't want to." He smirked a bit at that one. "You have taken everything that life has thrown at you and navigated it with grace. You really are just... you're it. You're her. You're the girl - the woman - I've always hoped would come my way but never dreamed actually would. Honey, I've figured out everything I need to know when it comes to how I feel about you."

You sat there, warm under his embrace, pondering his words as he spoke. It's nothing he hasn't said before, granted, in much less grand and emotionally charged ways. But it was like you were really hearing it for the first time. You wanted so badly to believe him.

"I love you," he continued. "I love you so much that sometimes I am afraid of myself. Of what I'd do for you. You, god, you make me so much better."

"I love you, too. Too much," you squeaked out.

"No. Not too much." He leaned back to encourage you to look up at him. "You know I really mean all that right? Just the way you are. Quirks included?"

"I guess. And now I'm just self-conscious that I am so self-conscious..."

"You say that as if I'm not the exact same way!" he chuckles, trying to make light of what is clearly a shared wound. You'll deal with that later. Together, preferably. "Please, trust me. Do you trust me?"

And you did. You trusted Spencer with every cell in your body and hair on your head. There was nobody else you'd ever been so confident in. So, you nod against his chest as your tears begin to subside.

"Good. Now why don't we move this party up into the bed?"

"No offense, Spencer, but the last thing I want right now is to f-"

"No no no nooope! Not that, babe," he laughed. "Just wanna lay with you 'til this feeling passes. Is that okay?"

"Please."

And so, the rest of the evening consisted of cuddles under your massive comforter. Sweet admissions whispered in your ear. The tiniest kisses to your hairline and your shoulder and your nose and your wrists.

By the time you dozed into a worry-free slumber, you believed him a little more.

Perhaps you could let Spencer love you, forever.

[ylangelegy]

it's the same old story, no matter how you spin it. maybe first love!wonwoo is the son of your mom's friend. maybe he's the boy down the street or the guy in the back of the classroom. hell, he could even just be the one you see on your daily commute; the familiar face in a crowd of hundreds. whoever he is, the feeling is the same.

you will think first love!wonwoo is perfect, because that's the appeal and the illusion of loves like these. the less you know, the better. in your head, he is everything you want him to be. he does everything right. you daydream of him treating you right.

first love!wonwoo, once you get to know him, has his own fair share of his flaws. he's private. he tires out easily. he values his own time more than anything.

but first love!wonwoo is still everything and more. always polite, sweet in all the right places. he doesn't lead you on, no. he's just a genuinely nice guy who will maybe start to see you as a friend; who will maybe start to acknowledge you, if he's more of the stranger-on-the-train type.

you're done for, the first time that you make first love!wonwoo smile. really smile. it's been closed lip, camera-ready grins so far. but then you do or say something that catches him off-guard, and a hint of those upper teeth come to the fore as he laughs, and you're done for.

the thing about first loves, though, is that we rarely do anything about them. they are shallow, fickle things, borne out of the need to see something pretty, to yearn without consequence. that's how you adore first love!wonwoo— with no expectations, with the innocence of someone who is happy to live for the hope of it all.

in the far future, you'll talk about first love!wonwoo fondly. it's not an embarrassing story to tell. he has the looks, after all, and the personality that justifies your feelings. when others get a glimpse of him, get to know him, they will know just how damn valid you are. wonwoo would have been their first love, too.

in the far future, maybe your paths will cross again. and maybe, now that you're older and hopefully wiser, you'll have the courage you never had before. "i think you were my first love," you'll tell wonwoo with a shy laugh, a small smile.

in the far future, first love!wonwoo will raise his eyebrows, as if to say oh?

it doesn't matter how the story starts. it always ends the same way: you, not knowing that first love!wonwoo's first love had been you.

[tojipie]

Off of your realistic headcanons, specifically the one with his wife, do you think he could ever fall inlove with reader? Genuinely. How patient would the reader be? Maybe he’d just end up running away again, but still.

read this first !

(im no gege :p take this with a grain of salt, all headcannons!)

honestly? I do think toji would have the capacity to fall in love again after his wife. losing any loved one is hard but what needs to be pointed out first and foremost is that when toji lost his wife he lost the genesis of what was essentially his chosen family. that's got to be an unimaginable obstacle to overcome.

we all know that his heavenly restriction robbed him of the familial love most children get from their families. knowing the zenins, that "love" was entirely transactional and based on what toji could contribute to the family as a sorcerer.

to go your whole life being told your mere existence is a fluke, and then waking up one day and realizing you not only have a wife but a beautiful son that love you unconditionally despite your perceived "flaws" would had been something he never though possible.

so to have your wife taken from this earth as a young adult, leaving you to raise your infant son alone after you thought your life was set is something that will stick with you forever. I do think toji would move on, but I don't think it'd be linear.

he'd probably spend the first few years dedicating himself to his work rather than a relationship. he'd probably graduate to couch surfing next, never staying with any women for longer than a month or two. then, when enough time had passed, he'd maybe pursue a couple relationships relationships that last a year or so.

and then reader comes along, and there's a constant uneasiness in the pit of his stomach that he can't quite get over.

toji doesn't know how he feels about you. he likes sleeping on your couch, sometimes your bed if he's good. he likes the meals you cook him and the shows you two watch together. he likes the feeling of your hand down his pants and your lips on his. y'know since we're being honest.

he's worrying himself sick wondering what it is you're doing to him. is it a curse? are you slowly poisoning him? eventually he figures maybe he just doesn't like you as much as he thought. and that's fine. he went years swearing off women after the death of his wife, and he has no problem dodging another for the sake of putting his money first.

but then he's in your living room nursing a beer, feeling your soft hands caress his face as you come up behind him and press a kiss to the back of his head. and he cries. he cries big, fat, hot tears that he wipes away with the sleeve of his carharrt jacket after you've gone to bed because for once in his life he sees a glimpse of the life that he once had, and he wants that life back so bad.

toji doesn't come back for a while. he buys a burner phone and skips town, working odd jobs for shiu until he figures out what the fuck he wants to do with the handful of decades he has left. he doesn't frequent any bars, doesn't warm anyones bed. he just exists. he exists like he did those couple of years after his wife passed, and he realizes that he's never been so miserable.

toji can't live without you. and he felt guilty for so long admitting that to himself, but it's the truth. you are everything he loves about the world and more. they say men never forget their first love, and that may be true. but when he imagines a life worth living he can only imagine waking up to your face in his neck each morning.

admittedly you're upset when he shows up at your doorstep 2 weeks later, sheepishly rattling off an explanation that sounds like its going in 5 different directions. you get things sorted out after a long uncomfortable talk. you knew what you were getting into when you got involved with the man, you get it for the most part. which he's surprised to hear. you end the night passed out on top of each other after demolishing 2 large pizzas and 3 horror movies, happy to finally be where you both belong.

˚ ✧ ──────

[2rats1gogh]

I’ve never really seen anyone talking about this, but I noticed that one of the main reasons why I am team green is because team green feels like an actual team that is in this whole thing together.

Team Green feels connected, united, like a family.

Team Black on the other hand is… meh.

And let me explain why:

Rhaenyra being delusional and thinking that Daemon is actually in love with her when he literally just groomed her since she was a child because he has always been after her title and now wants to be her king consort. They have one of the most toxic, creepy and problematic relationships in the entire fucking show.

Then there is the very awkward and uncomfortable moment of Rhaenyra and Daemon having sex on Laena’s funeral, while Rhaenys, Corlys, Baela, Rhaena and Laenor are mourning the loss of their daughter, mother and sister. How fucking disrespectful is this. And then the fact that they have Laenor “killed” just so they can get married and have their own perfectly blonde targaryen babies.

And Rhaenyra lying about Jace, Luke and Joff to everyone in her very own “team”, trying to gaslight not only Corlys, and Rhaenys but also her own sons into thinking they are trueborn, when even Jace himself. as a child, starts asking questions.

Then there are obviously Rhaenys and Corlys, who for some fucking reason neglected their trueborn granddaughters in favor of some dark haired white bastards their daughter-in-law is trying to pass off as their son’s children. Rhaenys is trying sooo hard to please her misogynistic husband because he so desperately wants his name to go down in history. Then the disrespectful betrothal of Jace and Luke to Baela and Rhaena. Rhaenyra is literally robbing these poor girls of their rightful claim to Driftmark and usurping them. And now, with Luke being dead, Rhaena’s claim dies with him.

Baela and Rhaena losing their mother, and now their father suddenly remarries, and has two blonde boys. Rhaenys losing BOTH her children and then seeing her son-in-law and daughter-in-law getting married soon after that.

Everyone in team black is after their own ambitions. They lie to each other, they don’t trust each other, they suspect each other in different things, they cheat on each other (with each other) and lie about it, they give each other forced ultimatums, and yada yada. All their scenes feel forced, tense, awkward and uncomfortable. They look so miserable with each other.

Team Green in this sense is the exact opposite.

Although their dynamic is far from perfect, obviously, you cannot deny that they care about each other very very deeply.

Alicent loves all of her children, and even while acknowledging their flaws, she still loves them.

Aemond might’ve been a little envious of Aegon, but he would never turn his back on him. He would never betray his brother, be would never try to take his crown from him.

Aegon was far from being a perfect man and king, but, as we know, it was his love for his family, and the fear of them getting hurt that made him a more responsible person and a more protective father, husband and brother. Sure, he is a cheater, but at least he’s honest about it and doesn’t lie to his wife. He is not a hypocrite.

Criston is working for Alicent not for ambition or for self-gain, but because he genuinely loves her, whether it’s romantic or platonic, doesn’t matter.

Helaena would never betray her family, her brothers, her mother. They are all she has. She would never switch sides even if given an opportunity.

And even Otto, arguably one of the main villains of the whole show, still loves his family. Sure, he is ambitious, but he would never become Corlys level of ambitious.

Team Green feels like they are fighting against the enemy all together, they have the same goals, they feel united and you can feel their devotion to each other. Especially after blood and cheese, when they become closer than ever. They’re in this together and only if they stick to each other, they can make it. It feels genuine and honest. They don’t hide anything from each other, they always have their loved ones’ best interests at heart, they would never in a million years betray each other. Yes, they are all doomed from the start, but their dedication and love to each other is truly something else.

[iwoulddieforienzo]

Something I really appreciate about TOA that I don’t see get talked about much is that I never get the sense that Apollo finds Lester ugly.

For all that he complains about the body he’s stuck in, I never got the feeling that it came from a distaste for Lester himself. When he sees Lester’s traits reflected in others, like Meg being chunky, he is completely unaffected by it. Finds it charming, even. (In fact, the only times I can remember him having Opinions about how someone looks is when they’ve chosen something about their appearance that he either approves or disapproves of, like a tacky jacket/hair cut or when he finds someone attractive. The only time I can remember him calling anybody ugly was when he pointed out that Dionysus was choosing to look as ugly as possible to piss of Zeus, which is a statement of fact and doesn’t necessarily mean he thinks that Dionysus’ form is actually ugly. He makes no mention of finding it so before or after that line. It’s a statement of fact that Dionysus is choosing a form that either he or Zeus finds ugly to piss of their dad.)

The thing about Lester is that he is so devastatingly mortal. He has flab and acne and no upper body strength and his voice squeaks when he’s nervous and he sweats a lot and he has a silly name and messy, curly hair that’s impossible to tame. He is the Most Teenager To Ever. There is no godly blood running through his veins, no powers he can call upon. If Apollo were to run into him in the street, I don’t think he’d pay him much mind. He’d probably just think, “sweet kid”, and move on. If he got to know him, I think Apollo would adore him because that’s just who rrverse!Apollo is. He loves mortals despite himself, flaws and all. He’d argue against anything bad Lester had to say about his own appearance and mean every word.

The problem is that it’s Apollo in this body. Apollo, The Golden Child, the perfect son, a God. His distaste for this body is because Lester is so devastatingly mortal and imperfect. Apollo has to be perfect, he has to be shiny and pretty and strong because he has nothing else to offer otherwise.

And.. I dunno, there’s something about Apollo hating the things that draw him to others when it’s him. The flaws that he tears apart in himself he finds endlessly charming on others, or he thinks that they have better reasons for why they have them, or he thinks they have enough positive traits to counteract them. The positive things that he hides deep enough that even the reader can’t see right away, like his kindness and genuine desire to understand and connect with everyone around him, that he’s shocked to find directed at him in turn.

That Apollo accepting himself and reclaiming his personhood leads to him being comfortable with being Lester, imperfect and mortal as he is. That he takes that imperfection back with him to Olympus… I dunno man I’m Emotional. Also it’s just plain nice that Lester is never treated as ugly for looking like a normal ass teenager, even by the guy stuck in this body. That’s neat.

Or maybe I’m just rambling and this means nothing at all and I’m reading too far into Blorbo from my books.

[automaticheartcrusade]

As a number 1 Fiddleford Mcgucket lover, I honestly love the fact that journal 3 revealed that he had secretly created the Society of the Blind eye behind Ford’s back and was USING the gun on him multiple times, because it added a new complexity to the character. What he was doing wasn’t morally correct, but he probably felt like he was doing what was best for Stanford since he cared about him so much. Is it a little fucked up? Very much so and that’s what makes Fiddleford’s character even more interesting. You feel SO bad for him, he didn’t deserve anything that happened to him, but more people need to acknowledge his flaws too, specifically his family.

When it was revealed that he had gotten into an argument with his wife because she was upset he forgot to get her a Christmas gift in the Book of Bill, I felt bad for her. We don’t know much about Emma May Mcgucket but I don’t think she’s supposed to be painted in a negative light. Some people hate the mere idea that Fiddleford may have been neglectful to her and his son Tate some point down the line, but I genuinely think that’s what happened, and people shouldn’t villainize his wife or Tate honestly. It was unintentional of course, we know that Fiddleford cared about his family deeply and had a portrait of them when he was working with Ford, but him choosing to pack up and go with Ford for long periods of time probably caused a rift in the family. And yes, there is a tragedy to it, because him forgetting to get his wife a present was probably due to the brain damage the gun had on him. However, both concepts that Fiddleford loved his family but went crazy due to what he witnessed, AND him partly being to blame for his own self destruction with creating the memory gun and getting addicted to it, are statements that can and should coexist. Him getting traumatized wasn’t his fault, but using the memory gun repeatedly and putting the society/work before his family was. Ford definitely had influence, but the point still stands.

And for me that’s part of the appeal for Mcgucket, he didn’t deserve anything that happened to him, he would have been a completely different person had he not taken Ford’s call, he’s pathetic and tragic, made his own mistakes but also got screwed over at life in the process. But he deserved the happy ending he got and I just love this sad old man.

[gffa]

"Truthfully, I didn't realize how much I've missed working side by side with Dick. We have a shorthand I don't share with any of the others, save for maybe Alfred. He's always been the one keeping me centered. Grounded." I genuinely don't think Bruce has a favorite among his sons, I don't think that's what this is about. He has a unique relationship with each of them and each of them are narratively a reflection of a different aspect of Bruce, each of them occupies their own space that's not about the others. But, and admittedly I may well be biased because of who my favorite is, I do think Dick was the first and that means something. Because he was the one that broke down the wall first and because it had to be him that broke down that wall, the way his tragic loss mirrors Bruce's and the way Dick is a narrative counterweight to Bruce, that Dick amongst all of them, is the overall superhero that Bruce wants to see in the world. He's the light that Bruce wants to see, even while he works in the dark. He's the one who refuses to not be loved, time and again. Respected, yes. But also Dick demands to be loved. That this is what keeps Bruce centered. That being poked and prodded to keep acknowledging that he loves people and that his presence in their lives helps them, that's what grounds him. That's reflected in Dick's big speech in this issue, that Thomas and Martha disapprove of Batman because they haven't yet seen what Bruce did for these kids he loves, what he did for Dick's life. And, too, I think Dick was the youngest when he came to Bruce and the one Bruce raised the most, that Dick will always be his boy in a way the others were already halfway to adulthood, that Bruce loves all of them just as much as each other, but Dick will always be his kid. It's why he struggles over and over with respecting Dick's independence and autonomy, because that right there is his baby even more than the others, who came to him later and more independent. Bruce has unique, complicated, and fascinating relationships with each of his sons, so much depends on who needs him the most, that's who gets the priority and the interaction and narrative weight at the moment. But when you ask which one of them does Bruce need the most--it's the one who understands him and centers him, the one who still looks at him, this complicated and flawed and often broken man of a father, and says, no, you're going to love me. Because that's what Bruce needs more than anything, that's when Bruce is at his most interesting as a character, when he's interacting with those he loves and being forced to reckon with all his issues because he needs to be better for them.

[bitterrobin]

you, batman/batfamily fan, can you be normal about parents and their flaws without making them exaggerated abusers?

can you absorb the fact that Jack and Janet Drake were not perfect parents, but they still loved Tim? and that Tim loved them enough that he tried to tear a razor sharp boomerang out of his father's corpse with his bare hands? that the Drakes were not millionaires who forced high society values onto their son for the sake of a public image? (that they weren't even rich for that long of a time?)

can you be normal about how the deep recesses of poverty affect a family unit while allowing a parent nuance? can you write Willis Todd without making him a classist caricature of an abuser? can you write Catherine Todd and Crystal Brown without portraying their drug addictions as fodder for their children's whump? (I added in Crystal bc she canonically suffered from drug addiction, but I haven't seen much of her in fics tbh)

can you accept that as much an abuser David Cain was, he still loved Cassandra enough that he utterly fell apart when she left him? That he was genuinely astonished/proud of her when she spoke to him for the first time even as she threatened him? he still sucks majorly, but you can't deny that he loved her. that's what makes their relationship so painful.

can you be normal about Talia al Ghul? can you write her without making her an ooc rapist or child abuser or cold dragon lady? can you acknowledge that every ounce of her characterization surrounding Damian is vastly different from her original pre-Morrison personality to the extent that og Talia would never even have a child in the League?

can you pick apart when a parents portrayal is out of character, that a writer made them hit or neglect their child because above all else they exist for drama and action? that you can find DC characters who actually had traumatic childhoods instead of grafting them onto a Bat-character? (> this last sentence is mostly about Tim btw)

Exploring a character's parents and how they affected them is always interesting, but I've seen fics that genuinely steer towards character assassination rather than an exploration of events written in the comics. They exaggerate a parent's portrayal not to write about a complicated parent-child dynamic but so they can have Bruce or Jason rushing in to comfort them (yes, this is about the Tim Drake shrimp fic). Idk, I think most of my ire just stems from the fact that content about Mia Dearden or Todd Rice or Grant Emerson aren't widespread, Mia specifically always gets explored in Bat-circles as someone that just adds to Jason's character rather than analyzing her on her own, in addition to the constant hell that Talia goes through in both canon and fanon.

[cutieeva]

Lost

Female reader

Warnings : Mention of infidelity. Trauma. Stalking.

𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒

Once trust is broken, it is harder than we think to mend it as it once was. A definition of (Y/N)'s relationship.

Perfection.

What a odd word isn't it ? something every being wants to learn and showcase yet behind close doors we all know in the back of our minds it's impossible. After all, perfection is a word for fake which is the opposite of what people want— real, something that is permanent, something that could be held, captured, savored. Perfection is a skill both admired and envied upon and (Y/N) can't help but come to doubt the perfection she once fell for.

Cameron. The man of perfection and the man she fell for only to doubt his every little move now. His gentle smile adoring the moment of her sight, eyes crinkling at the side by how large the happiness is craved out of him. It's sweet, truly, never did it not warm her heart and cast thousand butterflies on her stomach by how beautifully happy he looked to see her, and her only but suddenly she has come to doubt if it's even genuine or not. Suddenly she notice the smile too wide, too large, too happy, too fake that she wants ask. After all how it's possible to bright up so much like a sun glowed in the sky by seeing one person even if it's her who is his girlfriend. How ?

Just like now the moment of her heels touch the ground making a satisfying clicking noise entering a room, once their eyes met and he shine like the brightest sun she never imagined to have for herself. Again those tender lips, sparkling eyes too clear for any stranger to know he loves her and hard.

"How lucky ?"

"Awww !"

"Bless him".

"Lucky her"

These would be the frequent comments utter from literal stranger's mouths and perhaps— no for sure her past self could blindly agree dwelling into her own version of fairytale where Cameron was her prince charming and she, a pleasant he fell for. Well, at least that what in collage they are known for. The modern version of Cinderella, a very....interesting title it was when it first pass her ears yet time pass and it turn into a nasty taunting name for her as if hinting at something she was unaware like a insider joke that she was an outsider. Even her lovely boyfriend seems to hate it not at her level of hate like she despise it. Wishes to burn every tongue that ever deicide to merely utter that to her. Only if she could do she wish.

"Darling, sit". Like a gentleman he is pull her chair and let her sit on the wooden cold surface facing her own parents who seems to be in awe staring at their daughter's relationship as if it's a angel asked for her hand when he in her view seem nothing but a human good at masking his flaws, too well for her liking. Because see, the way those slender pale hands caress her own hand under the table like she is a flower touched carefully yet softly almost melt her heart if it didn't turn into stone now. (Y/N) didn't care to hold back, blankly staring at the white empty plate served in front of everyone and she like a doll waited to be served food despite having no hunger or whatsoever. Slowly she move her head, her (E/C) eyes watching the same smile craved out of him, towards her parents holding huge utensils to serve the meal he specially made to impress his future in-laws, his words not hers.

"Oh ! son, you don't have to do it !" Her father said, laughing carefree.

"It's okay, father. Let me at least have the honor to serve the elders". Kindly her boyfriend utter.

"Such a good man. How lucky my daughter is to have you". Placing one palm under her cheek, her mother watched him in pure delight.

"It's the opposite. Actually I am lucky to have her". His bashful comment earned more heart points than it already been taken as they laughed, enjoyed, indulge in their little bubbles that (Y/N) almost forget it's her parents and she is their family in here not him looking as if he is their son yet truly, in her angle she invisible, forgettable, easily a abandon thing that's why she use to question herself a lot. Why did he choose her ? why did he love her ? what is so special about her ? how could she not when he had oceans of girls waiting to just be looked by him, in campus he is the prince every girl dream and every boy befriend due to his looks, personality, popularity, riches. Coming from a wealthy family and still be a humble polite man isn't a daily view for everyone to see, he truly seemed like a sun to everyone, beautiful to look at but never be touched and owned, yet she a nobody has the chance to become a infamous girl who tame the sun. Perfect elements to gossip, spread rumors, talk down to.

Never passed a day did no one ever forget to remind her how insignificant she was to him and he was there to catch her, in his warmth of arms to show how significant she is to him and him alone and that all it matter and that it all took for her to be a idiot in love.

"Honey, eat before it's cold". Sweet his voice is, kind his eyes are that bore into her blank ones— deviod of love or any emotions, she doesn't know if he pretends to be blind to her lack of response or he simply doesn't care enough. Wordlessly she turn her head down to her this time meal served on plate— her favorite dish and their first date dinner together.

Carelessly her fingers wrap around the cold sliver fork like her heart tremble feeling and about to dig when ever so smoothly, like a cream of butter he swap the plate from hers to his. Smiling ear to ear boozing of tenderness. "Eat mine, yours is cold already". She didn't need to glance up to see her parents reaction or the warmth coming from him. She stilled like time does when a watch is broken, tramped. Listening to the clicks of plates, giggles of their voices, quiet noises of chewing, shower of compliments regarding the dish and still she didn't touch her food. Hunger seems to left her, emotions seems numbs, voices of them seem tiny and the reality feels surreal.

Oddly her visions seem distorted and water drops falling on top of the dish and something inside tells her it's will taste sour.

Is it raining ?

"(Y/N)...". Cameron's voice turn delicate, carefully calling her name. "Why are you crying ?" At the end of his sentence his voice cracked as if he was the one crying.

Oh. (Y/N) realize, blinking her tears away dripping to her meal, she discover more that it is indeed raining however inside her. More sour tears roll down, her lips didn't sob, her expression remained blank yet her tears fell one after another worrying her family and Cameron.

"I am sorry, Mister and Mrs. (L/N) but (Y/N) seems to be not herself and she needs time. Hopefully you will excuse us". Swiftly her body met his embrace, cold, hard unlike the light and mellow she was used to. "How fake". She thought letting him whisk her away in the car, watching her home disappear into the night and arrive in their shared apartment near their university and she find herself in their shared bed, feeling his choice of fabric underneath her skin, melting into his arms underneath her skin as he tenderly pat her back, rock her body like a baby, place her head on his chest, caressing her head and humming a song, a song they discover at their third date they like. "How cruel". She thought, dried tears on cheeks, not a shred of comfort she is finding nor searching. You can't expect to find gem in plastic can you ? so does she, staying motionless.

"Honey, can you please wait, I need to quickly go to washroom okay ?" Assuring like a child, he kiss her forehead deeply before pulling away leaving her alone with her thoughts and the room. The thud of door closing was almost unheard if not for the silence she was surrounded in when another noise pierce through the air.

Ding !

Her (E/C)'s flicker to the phone screen lit on the desk. His phone and she knew she had to look, to confirm her suspicions and catch the man red handed unlike the first time. How ironic, before such thoughts won't even cross her mind and now like a plague it's everywhere poisoning her, killing her softly. Her hand like a vice hold his phone the notification read inside her mind. 'Meet me tomorrow secretly'.

The door open revealing Cameron who came as fast as he could to console (Y/N) and his eyes met hers where she is sitting as before with his phone kept on the wooden cupboard and he smiles again bathing her in utter devotion. "Disgusting". Her eyes daze in disappointment. She knew he was having an affair, after the confront incident they had, never was they the same and will never. He never changed but she did and they both are aware of this yet no one dare speak out loud afraid of the illusion they built together to crumble once again.

"I will do it again". She decide tomorrow to end it all. For good.

Tomorrow came faster than she expected even by not finding a ounce of sleep, the other side of her bed felt heavy with his weight reminding of his suffocating presence at the same time he seems not to be present or maybe she is one instead of him.

"I can't go to university". Her vague answer didn't look to affect him as he lean in to close the gap of their lips, slender fingers stroke her either (S/C) cheeks and loving lips mold hers and starstruck eyes stare into her. A endearing moment she wished to capture if not for the knot inside her stomach wants to pull away, slap away.

"Okay, rest as much as you wish". He easily took her wish like she easily fell under his spell. Watching the man she loves pull away and go out taking his belonging to university which she knows is a lie. He is meeting behind her back and repeating the same heart tugs moments on another woman.

1

2

3

The moment (Y/N) felt him driving away on his car, she wore a white hat, a random coat and sat on the cab she booked few minutes ago and told the driver to follow the white car while her eyes dart from her her phone screen looking at the GPS tracking on his phone to his real time car, the tracker was set on him long ago not yesterday where she didn't even had the chance to unlock and read their chat properly because the password isn't what she thought, what she hoped. Her birthday nor his was enough to unlock. Another proving point of how fake his exhausting pretense of loving boyfriend is after all no lover boy as him would not set her birthday as his password. She knew what a ploy is once she sees though it and once was a mistake, twice would be intentional.

The car stopping snap her attention and she watch him go out of car and inside not the university he lied to but to a hotel. A luxurious one even she wasn't invited by him. How special the girl has to be, prettier ? younger ? richer ? doesn't matter when it ends all.

Hurried her footsteps were, walking though the doors opened by the guards and following him waking pass the lobby into somewhere else like he was familiar with the surrounding, nodding heads with the receptionists who mirror his actions and her heart skip more, odd emotions flood in she unable to understand.

She paused. Finally her eyes wide.

In front of her stood the same loving boyfriend hugging a girl passionately, grinning ear to ear and sat besides each other tasting meals like a date of rich people. Indeed she is far beautiful, charismatic, wealthier. Watching them enjoy, exchange dishes like a couple makes a odd sense of relief and betrayal wash her and without shame her feet march towards them, not a second pass of them finally noticing her, she smash the very dish he is enjoying to his face earning a yelp from her and (Y/N) did it again and again and again until stuff members of hotel pulled her away.

"I hate you cheater !" Cameron with difficulty look up, staring at her with pain, sadness ignited anger, disgust and satisfy inside her. Anger for how dare he acts to be in pain when the knife stab her and she is bleeding. Disgust to find the boy she thought the most beautiful so ugly and satisfy at least she brought him the same pain he did if not less.

"(Y/N) !" A familiar exclaimed turn her head. "What are you doing ?" A disbelief grasp slice the air by her best friend, Sophia and other boys and girls she knew from university. But what caught her eyes is the balloons held on their palms written Happy birthday (Y/N).

"W-what is going on ?" Her words stutter and in the split second the familiar place blur to strange, filled with questions and unreal like the knowledge she grasp was also a ploy she mistaken.

"My darling, today is your birthday and I was hoping to surprise you". His eyes relaxed as he tried to step to her to which she step back not wanting to believe his words. How could it be possible, it's impossible for her to forget her own birthday and even if she did, he was the liar at the end. A fake person. "This girl is the daughter of this restaurants and helped me to arrange the best dishes only". No. No. No. No. She shake her head, what prove does he have he is not lying.

"It's true, we are here to tell him your favorite likes, dislikes". Sofia answered averting her eyes as if too offended at her sight. Her words sting (Y/N)'s heart.

"We were only tasting the food—".

"What's your password ?" He pause like a information shone at him she didn't like.

"It's you". A snarl twist on her face. See, he is lying, he always was and still is.

"Liar !" With pain she screamed she didn't knew had inside her regarding him.

"No". Cameron shook his head gentle, appearing almost like an angel that her heart ache to believe his words. Believe him. "It's true, my password is the day we first met". And to confirm he in front of her type the date her mind clearly recalls and it opened along the rest of chatlog she couldn't read discussing about her birthday.

Tears swell in her eyes and her mistake came to light however there is also a realization sink in her mind that she no longer loves this boy, she loved and the perfection she fell for now become the very thing she come to loathe and it's all because of that bet. A silly little bet he made to date her and after she knew it, she still welcome him in her life forgetting to open her heart to the point every loving actions of his seems like a act of betray, sweet nothings seem blunt lies, loving care of his— fake. His betrayal hit her so hard she lost trust. The entire time when she was worrying about losing Cameron in reality loving him she lost herself and the twisted relief of seeing him with another woman was a fleeing excuse to break up. Once she believed the love fairytale and twice become too heavy to bear.

Her legs give up as she land on the ground, all alone. How could this happen ? how in process of loving him did she lost herself. Her happier, brighter, forgiving, trusting self ? maybe in the end she didn't forgive him for the bet she thought she did. 

𝑻𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒖𝒆𝒅

☾ ──────────

NEXT

[zipadeea]

I love that Percy not turning against the gods and joining Luke all came down to Poseidon. Because so far Percy hasn’t had great experiences with the gods, like at all. Mr. D is a liar, Athena was ready to let him and annabeth die, ares is now his sworn enemy, and the experience with Hephaestus was pretty traumatizing. Hades was self-serving, and didn’t give back Sally even when it was apparent Percy wasn’t at fault. And Zeus…Zeus was ready to smite Percy where he stood.

But he didn’t, because of Poseidon.

Percy should have died at the arch, he shouldn’t have made it out of the underworld, and I have a feeling once Zeus gets that bolt humming in your direction not a lot can stop him. But Poseidon did. Poseidon surrendered to his brother, gave up his pride and glory, to save his son. The son he hardly knows, the son he’s always protected and watched from afar, the son of the woman he loves.

“Do you ever dream about Mom?” Was such a good line. I think it was a genuine question from Percy, but it was also absolutely a test. Do you love my mom? Was it real? Do you love me? And Poseidon’s eyes, the way he gripped Percy’s neck then finally sent him away said it all.

Percy’s fatal flaw is loyalty, and once Poseidon earned Percy’s loyalty, Luke and Kronos didn’t stand a chance.

[egg-emperor]

I just can't stand for Gerald slander man. He was very troubled and flawed and made bad dangerous decisions out of love and desperation to the point that in the moment he didn't care what it cost him which he himself acknowledged, and he ended up doing something awful when he fully broke but like his bio said, at his core he was driven by benevolent ambitions. It's so much more tragic and impactful when you look at it for what it really is. And also makes him way more interesting for his intended complexity

He cared about benefitting humanity with science and Shadow said he told him that in SA2, he cared about trying everything he could to help Maria, he cared about Shadow and built the Eclipse Cannon with it set to be used to destroy the Black Comet in the future and addressed it as a gift to Shadow while apologizing for giving him a battle he never asked for in his journal, he apologized to Shadow for the path he put him on but is proud of how he's walked it in SXSG when he's in his right mind, he loves him like a son and calls him such

It's all right there and you're only fixed on the person he became when he reached the tipping point and went insane when what he loved most was ripped from him tragically. Then he clearly couldn't think clearly to think about anything he had left like Shadow and no longer had love for humanity for how they took Maria away from him when he originally wanted to make people happy through the power of science

Even the whole deal with creating a rift between his sons and how they don't talk much to him much, likely because of they didn't like the idea of his way of treating Maria and such high priority of her and stuff, even then in the journal he says "my love for them shouldn't be a divisive issue" it was out of love for them too. No matter what he always acted with the best intentions and love and care for others and it's WHY he made bad choices. He made a deal with Black Doom because he was getting desperate for the same reason

Does it make what he ended up trying to do right? No, obviously not, but there's still a reason and insisting he was always a horrible abusive asshole that genuinely didn't care about anyone or only Maria isn't it. He's not Eggman who literally only does it for selfish gain in ways that benefit nobody but himself while in his regular state of mind. Gerald literally went insane and became a shell of who he was while Eggman's intentions were evil and selfish from the start. People have it backwards and I'd wish they'd have that energy towards Eggman where it's true instead of slandering Gerald

I might just make a big Gerald post gathering all the proof lol

[takeachillpillshawty]

Things I need to see in more\ want to happen twst fanfics

Vil living as Vil Schoenhiet the student at NRC and not THE Vil Schoenhiet model, actor, and influencer.

Kalim angst. I love him but sometimes I love seeing my babygurl suffer, and not Jamil betraying him angst. No, I want him to question his self worth as a dorm leader in general, I want him to be on edge at the thought of an assassin at school, I want him to worry about the people he befriends knowing that getting involved with him will put their lives in danger just like him.

Leona's hinted depression being discussed.

Jade finally being seen as the scarier twin than Floyd, I don't care Jade lovers your mans is scaring away the hoes.

Yuu\ Prefect \ YN adjusting to the world or Twisted Wonderland... Literally, getting used to the oxygen, atmosphere, eating fruits or food that doesn't exist in their world, so on and so on.

Riddle being a kid.

Vil enjoying his flaws and accept that there are people who genuinely love him even if he isn't the fairest one of all.

Trein and Riddle having father son moments.

Jamil realizing that his parents played a bigger role of his hatred for Kalim, and that it was possible for he and Kalim to be friends after all.

Silver and Sebek being brothers. Yes, I see them as brothers Silbek shippers don't come at me.

Ortho being creepy as fuck, like as in uncanny valley creepy. I know with my full heart that is Ortho was real he'd give major uncanny valley effect. I love him, he's still my son.

Lilia going through the grief of losing Meleanor.

Grim and Prefect some how fusing together into one being, A being able to do magic and be accepted as a student.

Kalim being unhinged, like feral. Not in the sugar rush kind of way, like giving a 5 year old the power of God kind of unhinged.

Cater, Kalim and Lilia all just collectively crying together to let all the stress, frustration, anger and sadness out. They usually do this during club hours.

N I E G E L E B L A N C H E.