#her love falling gravely injured and eventually recovering

[dungeons-n-muses]

Star’s Playlist:

[electronickingdomfox]

"Mindshadow" review

One of these days, Spock will do the logical thing and get an all-risk insurance for his brain...

Novel from 1986, by J. M. Dillard. Okay, this story is quite messy, as it tries to put together a pastiche of plot threads and themes that may or may not be that cohesive. It borrows heavily from TOS episodes, from The Enterprise Incident to Journey to Babel (even a bit from Wolf in the Fold). There are definitely a few plot holes and some silliness. The espionage/murder plot is sometimes too convoluted to follow. Also, some names look like typos: Transporter technician "Lyle"? (I'm pretty sure that was supposed to be Kyle), the penal colony of "Ebla Two"? (should have been Elba Two), "Chekhov"????... In terms of absurdity, it's similar to that other novel, "Black Fire" (and yes, there's even a pirate Spock in here too). But just as it happened with that book... I actually liked this one as well. It's a glorious mess, alright.

The most serious (and somber) thread is that of Spock receiving brain damage, and his struggles to recover his memories and Vulcan mental disciplines. The abuse he suffers from medical malpractice, his frustration with his impaired learning, his loving (and sometimes painful) relationship with his family, or Uhura's tender attempts to help him through music... Those elements have probably the greatest emotional impact in the novel, and are actually pretty good in themselves. This is also, at core, a "triumvirate" novel, with strong character drama between Kirk, Spock and McCoy, and a focus on their closeness.

On the other hand, there's another, more ridiculous drama: both Kirk and McCoy fall in love with the same Mary Sue, and hilarity tragedy ensues. For his part, Kirk seems pretty callous in his seduction of this woman, as he doesn't even like her all that much; at times, it almost looks as if he just wanted to piss McCoy off (isn't there really ANY other woman available for him!?). While McCoy, who truly loves the Mary Sue, ends up looking incredibly pitiful, desperate and, well, downright pathetic. However, out-of-character as it is, I ended up getting some guilty pleasure from all of it, as in "Let's see Kirk's next shitty move and what happens next..." Anyway, even though the woman likes the two of them, she ends up realizing they're both just too gay for Spock, to the surprise of nobody.

Spoilers under the cut:

The planet Aritani has suffered recent raids from cloaked vessels, so Kirk is negotiating with the natives to offer Federation help against the attacks, despite the natives’ reticence towards technology. They erect a shield around the planet to prevent the fighter ships entering the atmosphere, or trap below it those that may be cloaked right now. Then Spock goes alone to investigate the nearby mountains, since he found valuable minerals that could be the objective of the raiders. However, when Spock is late to report, Kirk goes after him… And finds out he has fallen off a cliff and has gravely injured his head. McCoy’s assessment is that Spock has suffered extensive damage to the left hemisphere, so his logic, language and memory will be impaired, and the doctor has many doubts about his eventual recovery; they’d need a neuropsychologist specialized on Vulcans.

Meanwhile, Kirk authorizes shore leave on the surface of Aritani, as several hours have passed without sighting any fighter (the reasoning being that, by now, they’d have run out of fuel to keep their cloaks up). Well, if you ask me, I don’t think it’s the most appropiate time and place for shore leave; and sure enough, a little while later a group of enemy vessels appears out of nowhere and starts attacking the crew on leave. Kirk and Scott can’t understand how that’s possible, and only see two options: either the fighters have an improved cloaking device that allows them to stay hidden for longer, or they somehow managed to penetrate the shields. Actually, there’s a third option, which they never even consider: they’ve been beaming people down to the planet for shore leave! That means they’ve been lowering the shields ALL THE TIME!! Duh… Kirk is having the worst day of his life, and on top of that, the Aritanians refuse further help from Starfleet, after their failure to protect them. Kirk’s orders, however, are to stay in the vicinity.

In sickbay, Uhura comes to visit an injured friend and starts singing for him. Then, upon hearing the music, Spock finally shows some reaction, and is capable of calling her name and asking for songs, as his right hemisphere (supposedly associated with emotions and art) is intact. During the following days, Spock will make some progress thanks to Uhura’s company. Apart from that, a new neuropsychologist is assigned to the Enterprise to study Spock’s case: Dr. Mary Sue Emma Saenz. Five minutes later, both McCoy and Kirk fall head over heels for her (to the point that McCoy is jealous even when Kirk says “Hello” to her). Emma also shows an unusual physical strength when she beats Kirk in their combat trainings. Nonetheless, it turns out that Emma… is actually Dr. Evil!Mary Sue!! She forces a mind-meld with Spock while alone with him, and extracts some important information about what he saw in Aritani, before erasing his memory of the meld. Her diagnostic is that Spock will probably recover in the areas of language and amnesia. But he has lost the Vulcan mind rules to shield himself away from others’ emotions, which he can now receive telepathically at all times. This could turn him into a violent individual, and Emma suggests restraints and an experimental medication: neodopazine.

In the bridge, Chekov manages to locate a decloaked enemy vessel, and they capture it with a tractor beam along one of the pirates. The raider turns out to be Romulan, but he denies the existence of any special device to penetrate shields, and Scotty doesn’t find anything of the like upon dismantling the fighter. Kirk was about to interrogate the prisoner, when they discover he’s been vaporized. Someone stunned the guard, then removed the brig force field and killed the prisoner, trying to make it look like a suicide. Security doesn’t have a clue about the killer (though the reader certainly can suspect who is it…). If this wasn’t enough, Spock is found in bed with his wrists sliced, as if he had also attempted suicide. Spock denies having done so, and says someone tried to murder him, but he doesn’t remember who. Emma is furious and gaslights Spock, saying he’s imagining murderers to cover up his suicide attempt. McCoy, however, takes Spock’s side and has a violent discussion with Emma, who ends up admitting she just wants to help Spock. Of course, the situation is very romantic, so they kiss. Later that night, Kirk is having trouble to sleep (no wonder) and goes to McCoy’s cabin for some pills (you see, he can’t go to sickbay, no; if he doesn’t sleep, then McCoy can’t either). Then Kirk finds out that McCoy is… sleeping with Emma!! Kirk doesn’t like that.

Since Spock believes his only option of recovering the mind rules is returning to Vulcan, he’s sent there in a shuttle with Scotty and Chapel. The shuttle has been sabotaged, and they crash land on Vulcan, though just with minor injuries. Spock is fine, so he leaves Scotty with Chapel at the hospital, and walks to his home town on foot. During the following weeks, he will stay at his parents’ home, trying to relearn the Vulcan disciplines with a Kolinahr master. His progress is really slow, though, and with mounting frustration, he realizes the neodopazine, far from helping, seems to be deteriorating his mind. Spock also meets T'Pala, a girl who's staying with his parents while she studies to enter the Vulcan Diplomatic Corps. T'Pala has many things in common with Spock: she's also half human, and has difficulty adapting to Vulcan life (even moreso than Spock, since she grew up in Earth). Sarek's disappointment with her is a mirror for Spock's own youth.

In the Enterprise, Scotty is put in the brig as the main suspect for the Romulan's murder (of course, he's later cleared of charges). For his part, Kirk hurts his shoulder while training with Emma. She takes him to her quarters to treat the injury, gives him an analgesic, and then they kiss. McCoy waits for Emma the whole evening, grows increasingly suspicious, and finally sees her leaving Kirk's cabin. After that, he mopes for a couple of days, until Kirk visits him with a bottle of moonshine ("here, I stole your girlfriend, but you can get drunk with this..."). Kirk, however, says he doesn't remember what he did with Emma. And Emma confirms that Kirk just passed out because of the analgesic; she's attracted to Kirk and kissed him, but nothing else happened. McCoy is happy with this (he doesn't ask for much, right?) and suddenly he's like "Hey, you slept with me a couple of times. Where's my wedding ring!? I'm a decent boy!". Emma says she'll leave soon, so no, no wedding...

After this, the Enterprise is tasked with bringing a bunch of ambassadors to Vulcan, to discuss the acceptance of Aritani into the Federation. This part is a bit dull and drags too much, in my opinion. During the journey, more suspicious incidents take place: one ambassador is killed, another is badly hurt, and an explosion leaves the Enterprise without warp drive. It seems someone doesn't want Aritani to join the Federation. Then, Kirk discovers that Emma has been making unauthorized transmissions, but she assures him she's been working for Starfleet Intelligence all this time. An Admiral confirms this point, so Kirk is satisfied.

Back in Vulcan, Spock has stopped taking the neodopazine, and experiments a clear improvement. Finally, he's able to recover the mind rules, and his memories from Aritani return to him in dreams. There was something really important he needed to tell Kirk, and now that the Enterprise is near Vulcan, Spock opens a transmission to the ship. But just before he can say anything, an assassin breaks into his house, injures Sarek, and tries to slice Spock's wrists again. He wants to make it look as Spock murdering Sarek, then killing himself. T'Pala intervenes at the last moment, vaporizing the assassin with a phaser. Then, she confesses that Romulans approached her to leak info about Spock, but she couldn't comply with their murderous plans. Having failed at entering the Diplomatic Corps, T'Pala doesn't have much more to live for, and she kills herself too.

Sarek and Spock recover in a hospital from the attack. And Kirk and McCoy band together against Emma to go visit him. Then Spock tells everything. What he saw at Aritani was some fighter vessels beaming up from below the earth, where the Romulans must have an underground base (that's why the atmospheric shield was useless). Knowing that they'd kill him, Spock decided to escape by jumping from the cliff, where he damaged his head. Much to McCoy's surprise, Spock also shows him a medical article written by Emma, explaining all the damaging effects of neodopazine in Vulcan brains. McCoy confronts Emma about the use of such dangerous drug on Spock, just when she was leaving for her next assignment. But she stuns him (and a bunch of other people) and escapes the ship, confirming their suspicions.

In the last part, the Enterprise returns to Aritani to destroy the Romulan base once and for all. Kirk gets again that surgery to look Romulan (as in The Enterprise Incident) and infiltrates the compound with Spock (who's dressed as a Romulan pirate, while McCoy wants to pierce his ear). However, they're captured by a Romulan officer, that Kirk recognizes as Emma. Her real name is Tanirius, and actually, she wasn't Evil!Mary Sue at all. She just carried out the Praetor's orders as a cover-up, all the while working for Starfleet and a group of Romulan rebels, to destroy the underground base. She gave Spock the neodopazine to avoid killing him, once she understood how important he was for McCoy and Kirk. This plot twist really took me by surprise, but that's in part because... well, it doesn't make much sense. You know, despite the novel trying to present Emma as eventually good, she's just not! Not only did she try to kill Spock SEVERAL times, but she was far more efficient at carrying out the Romulans' plans than what was strictly necessary!! (whatever, maybe she was just jealous of Spock). Emma helps them to deactivate the cloaking device of the base, and then stays behind to destroy it whole. Kirk and Spock beam up to the Enterprise in time, while an underground explosion shakes the planet. In the aftermath, Aritani accepts the Federation's help, now that they're free of Romulans. And Spock tries to console McCoy saying that some vessels fled the base in time, and Emma could be among the survivors. Kirk sees through his bullshit, though, and wonders if Spock is just lying because he also has affection for McCoy, much to Spock's indignation.

McSpirk Meter: 9/10*. The Kirk/Spock angle is more evident. When Spock is injured, Kirk just can't think about anything else. He goes constantly to sickbay to check his state, argues with McCoy, is irritable with everyone and everything... Kirk even tries to reach the catatonic Spock through a mind link, to no avail. And once he gets a replacement First Officer, Kirk is unreasonably hostile to him, just because he's not Spock. It's also said several times that Kirk is the person that knows Spock better in the entire world. Another remarkable scene happens when Spock is leaving for Vulcan. Spock can feel Jim's emotions and pain at his departure, and his repressed impulse to touch him, so Spock relents and takes his hand. As for McCoy, his care for Spock comes rather as medical concern, but Emma sees through him quite early. She says he's too emotionally involved with the patient to be of any help. And despite the fact they're in a relationship, it seems that all of McCoy and Emma's conversations revolve around Spock, which causes continous tensions between them. At one point, she states the facts clearly: "I have risked myself for your friend because you loved him". Effectively, the reason she gives for not killing Spock outright, is that McCoy and Kirk cared about him too much. The ending lines have Kirk reminding Spock of this fact, and wondering if Spock also returns McCoy's affections.

Apart from this, there's a certain tension between Kirk and McCoy. Before the whole problem with Emma begins, they're reminiscing their shore-leaves together, and McCoy is said to grin lasciviously at Jim. Also, when Emma tells Kirk that she and McCoy are having dinner together, McCoy starts blushing, and doesn't understand why such a simple statement embarrasses him so much. Later, Kirk comes to McCoy's cabin in the middle of the night, and finds him basically naked (wearing just a short tunic), which almost prompts a sarcastic whistle from him. He attempts to enter the cabin (you know, with naked Bones in there and all) and feels offended when the doctor doesn't let him come inside. At last, after they reconcile, McCoy comments that Kirk looks dashing in his Romulan pirate uniform. There's also something in Kirk's behavior about Emma, that almost seems like a disgruntled ex trying to ruin the doctor's new relationship. After all, Kirk doesn't even find Emma all that attractive at first.

[horizon-verizon]

Baela is an absolute ICON. Truly her father’s daughter. The fact that she was only 13 years old when she bravely fought a 23 years old Aegon II in a dragon duel. This act of courage saved her from being struck dead by an enemy lord after being gravely injured in said duel. And even as her dragon, Moondancer, fell from the sky, taking Sunfyre down with her, she didn’t dismount, unlike Aegon II, who did in fact jump off before both dragons hit the ground, ended up crippled for life by the twenty foot fall and lived the rest of his life in great pain. And Sunfyre would never fly again and eventually died from the wounds inflicted by Moondancer. Baela ended Sunfyre and almost killed Aegon II.

Yes, Baela seems to have similarly bold and self-possessed traits as Daemon. However (and this isn't an invective against you, anon), so does Rhaena. She's just as much Daemon's daughter as Baela. While it is true that Daemon's being their dad set up their feelings of power & autonomy/self-esteem because Daemon was actually more supportive of his daughters than most Westerosi lords, both women develop their personalities/boldness as their own without having it all come down to them being Daemon's daughters.

Rhaenyra also would have had a hefty hand in their development, and in their first few years, they still had Laena. women leading by example would have also inspired her to do as she does with her smallfolk friends/followers and her whipping the Peake follower as she and Rhaena both brought Daenaera to Aegon III, rescuing him and a lot of other people associated with them from anything Unwin Peake planned through marriage to his daughter Myrielle. Rhaena does this while recovering from a miscarriage while Baela was heavily pregnant. "Strength" in the physical sense can thus be argued to go for both girls, but still, for both, their "strength" is more how they shaped their communities or families' lives despite patriarchal attempts to limit their movements or decisions from ideologically gendered principles of female obedience and sexual "purity".

Baela "does more stuff" and does more starkly cool stuff than Rhaena (because she's more militaristic or does more stuff like these in a war context), but Rhaena is known as the very last dragonrider before Dany AND she managed to hatch said dragon (Morning) by herself after years of waiting. Other than it being narratively symbolic that the Targs get to "live another day" as rulers but also as survivors--contrasted to her brother Viserys II, managed to hatch her egg--it implies another sort of "strength" or a unique-to-her condition that is reminiscent and foreshadowing Daenerys' special bond with her dragons. Both are rejuvenating/rebirth and female-protection symbols/figures. And other Targs before her either bonded with the dragons in the cradle and didn't have to wait to bond or they had to bond with a more grown dragon anywhere from their preteens to young adulthood (12ish-19ish--and most bonded the latter way).

As for Aegon-Sunfyre, yes agreed. She was still badass. I mean, she ran and scaled a lot of the smooth-stoned castle walls--plus many building roofs--to get to Moondancer...that's insane agility, dexterity, and determination!

("Rhaenyra Overthrown")

This was meant to answer a general fan applaud that usually characterizes Baela's personality as mainly coming from Daemon's being (as if Daemon passed down boldness to her passively), instead of the result of and a reflection of an emotionally invested/child-first/pro-women upbringing that wouldn't have just been Daemon's doing or responsibility.

After all, Daemon still has his own misogyny (the insults against Rhea Royce) WHILE he seemed to have loved his mother and has been most like Visenya in role and partial temperament.

[my-soul-sings]

just my luck: chapter 13

Fandom: Wannabe Challenge Characters: Taehee x Reader

|| chapter 13: a fresh start ||

Read on AO3! 

full chapter

***

It took only one more day for Taehee to be discharged. The doctor had been amazed at the rate of Taehee’s recovery, and the both of you had said nothing, only nodding in agreement while exchanging sheepish, knowing glances.

Hansol drove the car to pick you both up from the hospital, and when he arrived he was cheery as ever. It looked like he hadn’t been worried about Taehee at all, which made you wonder if getting injured like that was a common occurrence for this man. Or maybe it was simply the fact that it was impossible for Taehee to die or get gravely injured in the first place. Thinking back now, it made sense that Hansol and Biho had been more concerned about you than Taehee when they came to visit that day.

Once everyone was back at the apartment, the first thing Taehee did was make two announcements to his friends.

The first was that you now knew that they were all goblins. Biho and Hansol’s eyebrows had both shot up at that, but otherwise they looked like they had expected something like this to happen eventually.

The second thing was that you would be staying with them longer than expected. When Biho asked why the change of heart (none of them were unfamiliar with your stubbornness by now), all Taehee did was interlock his fingers with yours. The man didn’t know the meaning of being discreet or subtle.

Hansol and Biho instantly understood, brightening with smiles and words of congratulations. Embarrassed, you had pulled your hand away from Taehee, who only laughed and rested his hand against your warm cheek.

Hansol had complained loudly, wondering if this would be the amount of PDA he and Biho would have to put up with from now on.

Biho had been more opportunistic—while Taehee went to unpack in his room, he pulled you aside to request you to distract the clean freak while they tidied their rooms and did the pile of dishes in the sink. Apparently, they thought they would have one more day with the house to themselves, so they hadn’t bothered cleaning up after last night’s dinner.

You had agreed easily—Biho wasn’t the kind of guy people could say ‘no’ to without feeling a prick of guilt.

However, the plan backfired quite quickly when they weren’t able to clean up in time, and even you were powerless to stop Taehee from going on one of his tirades once he started. Soon, the house was filled with the sound of Taehee’s scolding, Hansol’s defiant retorts and Biho “accidentally” dropping a few dishes while washing them, adding to the heightening noise levels.  

It was just another day of living in a house with three goblins.

The funny thing was, you had grown used to it. You liked it even—the bickering, the nagging and the bantering.

It was starting to feel like home.

***

Taehee was happy.

It had been a long time since he felt like he could breathe without feeling heavy iron chains around his chest. He couldn’t recall the last time he could smile so much without realising it until his cheeks hurt.

Actually, he did remember. Somewhat. His memory had weathered, chipped away slowly like rusted metal as time went by, and now all he had left were scattered bits of the time spent with her back then.

But the memories were slowly coming back to him as he spent more time with her. They had to stay at home for a week or so, since he was still on medical leave and she had to work from home while the office was being fixed. And as the days went by, Taehee was quickly learning that she was the same woman that he had come to know and love a long time ago.

Things were completely different now—the era they lived in, the world that had changed so much from the conservative town he had grown up in—but he was relieved that some things could withstand the test of time.

For one, she still had that habit of saving her favorite food for last—and that applied to his cooking now. Cooking was only something he had picked up after becoming a goblin, and for the longest time he had regretted not learning sooner and cooking a meal for her when she was alive. It was why he had nearly cried when he got to cook for her for the first time after meeting her again. Fortunately, no one had noticed.

She also still found the most peculiar things amusing, even when he didn’t mean to make her laugh. There was one time he almost wore his apron to sleep by accident and she had laughed for a full minute, bending over and clutching her abdomen while he scrambled to take it off.

Then there was her caring side. Occasionally she’d forget that he was a night goblin and chastise him for staying up late instead of resting. Sometimes he would be engrossed in cooking or reading something, and when he looked up, he’d find her staring at him with a curious smile playing on her lips. While she wasn’t usually the one to initiate hugs or skinship, she would do it sometimes when she thought he was sleeping—running her fingers through his hair, patting his head, pressing a kiss to his forehead and whispering, “Sweet dreams”...

It really did feel like a dream. Everything did. He couldn’t remember the last time he dreaded sleeping and was excited to wake up.

And so it was ironic when Taehee remembered one day that soon, his time would start running again. Falling in love with a human and pledging to love her for the rest of his life meant that he would now have a limit on his life—one that he had wanted to lose for so long and was starting to cherish and desire again. The thought of death now scared him rather than relieved him.

But then she would hold his hand, and the worries and fear would scatter. He would notice the lines on the palm, the ones on his, and imagine the wrinkles that would form in years to come. The one thing that he didn’t want to change was their intertwined fingers, her hand held tightly in his.

And Taehee decided that he finally had a new goal. This time, it wasn’t to be the top scholar of a national examination, nor was it to place a flower crown on her head.

This time, the goal was far more pressing and urgent: he had to find a way to protect her from her misfortune… or attempt to change it entirely.

***

Two weeks later, your wrist healed, which brought your recovery period to a total of seven weeks. The three goblins were ecstatic on your behalf and Taehee cooked up a feast that evening to celebrate. This time, you were able to help them out with the cooking and the washing.

It wasn’t until later that night that you realised Taehee was being unusually shifty and restless around you. He seemed to be making rounds around the house, walking from his room, passing by the couch where you were, drawing near but then taking an unnatural turn towards the kitchen, before returning to his room. The process repeated quite a few times until it became too obvious not to notice him circling you like a scared shark.

Eventually, you called his name to get him to talk.

“Do you need help?” he asked, eyeing your recovered wrist as you set up your “bed” with the blankets. You had vehemently refused to move into his bedroom despite your new relationship status—it was more out of embarrassment than anything else, especially with Biho and Hansol around. Making things awkward was the last thing you wanted in this house, especially when you were perfectly happy with the way things were at the moment.

“I’m fine,” you smiled, waving that hand around to show that it didn’t hurt anymore. “The exercises you told me to do were very helpful.”

A small breath escaped him. You couldn’t tell if it was a sigh or a laugh. You continued setting up the blankets while he watched quietly. Something felt off; he clearly had more to say than ask if you needed his assistance with a piece of cloth.  

“Taehee.”

“Hmm?”

“Are you okay? You’re being awfully quiet and you’re just staring at me.”

“Oh…” He looked away sheepishly, as if he hadn’t realised he had been boring two large holes in your head. “Sorry. I was just thinking.”

“About?”

“I, um… Well, your wrist has healed, but you’re still going to stay here, right?”

You blinked at him, confused. “What? Didn’t we already talk about this? I’m not leaving, unless… you want me to?”

“No! No, I didn’t mean that.” He exhaled in relief, almost as if he had been holding his breath for a long time. Then without warning, he wrapped his arms around you in a tight embrace, squeezing you until it was hard to breathe. “Thank you,” he said, his breath tickling the shell of your ear.

He was acting like a puppy with abandonment issues—probably because of all the things he had been through before. You hugged him back, a hand running up and down his back.

“You worry too much.”

He nodded in agreement. “I know, I’m sorry.”

“Were you pacing up and down the house for the past thirty minutes because of this?”

“...Yes.”

The reluctant admission made you chuckle. It was tempting to tease him further, but you decided to cut the poor man some slack.

“If that’s all, you should go to sleep now. You have work tomorrow.”

“Actually... there was something else I wanted to talk to you about.”

Your brows arched as he released you from his embrace, although he held on to your hands. You had learned over the past two weeks that Taehee was much more clingy than he appeared to be—not that you disliked it.

“It’s not confirmed yet and it’s just a theory for now, so I don’t want to get your hopes up for nothing, but I thought you should know.”

“Okay…”

He sounded serious, in the same way he did when he shared about his past that night in the hospital. Goose pimples began to rise on your forearms, but you couldn’t make any likely guesses as to what he was about to tell you.

Taehee stared at you hard for a moment, as if to assess if you were truly mentally prepared for this. Conflict was written in his eyes and it was making you nervous as well. It was hard to tell if this was even good or bad news based on the constipated face he was making.

Finally, he spoke. And it was the last thing you would have ever expected to hear in your life.

“There might be a way to get rid of your bad luck.”

[ziracona]

Do you have your own headcanons for the newer characters? I try to imagine them interacting with the rest of the characters and after reading ILM everything you write is canon for me now (been dissapointed with the recent tome).

I have some! Though except for the Stranger Things kids, I don’t know any of the new ones as well and I haven’t written for them, so I don’t have a ton for most of them. 

I think for Ash, being in the realm is weird, because he’s been through his share of hell, but like, Ash is from a Horror-/comedy/? And there’s a lot of overlap, but if you lived in a horror comedy world and went to psychological horror torture horror world, it would be some whiplash, even for a seasoned dude. It’s not that he hasn’t been through horrible stuff, it’s that it felt different before. The realm is such a grind. It’s an unending cycle. And Ash is used to not being able to outrun trouble, but he’s used to that meaning life is a fight. Now, there’s nothing he can really do, and danger means constantly running and struggling and failing. So I think that would be hard to cognitively get used to. Because of his personality (as I understand it--I’ve only seen Evil Dead, & I’d do more research before actually writing him) though, I think he would weather it surprisingly well, and be the kind who can crack jokes and be cocky and fun even there. Because of that, I think he and Meg would vibe really well and get along, and so would he and Ace.

Ash likes to tell stories about all the wild stuff he did before the realm. Some of them believe him (Claudette, Meg, Dwight, Steve)--or mostly do but think he exaggerates (Laurie, Quentin, Nancy), some think he’s super lying (Jane, Jake, Min, Zarina), and a lot fall in between. They all enjoy them though, because he’s a great storyteller and very engaging.

Ash isn’t exactly a support unit /at all/, but the fact he lost a hand pre-realm is surprisingly helpful to the group in a support area. Any time someone in the group is wounded outside a trial and has to recover, he’s way better than anyone else at helping them get used to operating without whatever they’ve lost, and just seeing how well Ash can carry his weight doing complex stuff like fixing a gen even down a hand alleviates a lot of fear for them about what would happen if one of them got /gravely/ hurt. This is wild for Ash, because he sure wasn’t much of a support member/usually isn’t, but he goes with it and is glad to help.

Ash greatly dislikes going against Rin. She hits way too close to home. He’s pretty desensitized to gore and horror and violence from his life even pre-realm, but his first experience with horror involved his sister and his girlfriend being attacked and then turning into monsters and trying to kill him, and he was a baby--like 21 at the time, super young adult--and it was extremely traumatic. He almost died because his girlfriend kept seeming like herself and the horror and gore would vanish from her demon-zombie form and she’d be her again, and he’d think he could save her, but she was dead the whole time. The way that Rin looks like a horrible smiling monster viciously hungry for your pain and then will suddenly flash to looking like a heartbroken teenager crying over what she’s done is way too reminiscent of that. It’s literally the only thing in the realm that /really/ shakes him.

(Nancy, Steve, Yui, Zarina, and Cherly HCs under the cut)

Nancy and Steve are really glad they ended up there together instead of alone (I mean, they aren’t happy the other is in hell, but like, it really helps them both to have the emotional support of person they knew from before with them). Nancy adjusts to the realm faster than Steve as in takes it in stride and learns faster, because she’s more cool headed, but it’s about equal levels of awful and slowly eating at them both. They depend on each other a lot to keep up their spirits and to talk about old memories and the loved ones back home.

Nancy gets along really well with Kate, Claudette, Yui, Jeff, and Laurie, but pretty well with them all. Steve also fits in just fine, but gets along especially well with Claudette, Meg, David, Quentin, and Min and Laurie (eventually).

Laurie and the ST kids bond and get a lot of relief from being from similar times. This is especially nice for Laurie, who hasn’t seen anyone from her time in a long time, and feels very lost and last-man-standing because of it. Since the ST kids are from only a few years after Laurie, they get to talk about a lot of the same stuff.

Steve tries to pick Laurie up because he’s bowled over by how cool and strong she is. She doesn’t even notice. When she /finally/ does like a week after he starts trying, she goes, “Are you trying to hit on me /here/?” bc dating in the realm is beyond wild to Laurie who has been in survival mood since 1978 and not even /thought/ about changing that setting. They’re in a group at the time and Steve is so embarrassed that even though he’s flirty, he doesn’t flirt with anyone for like a whole month. This is actually really good for him, because Steve is the kind of person who doesn’t really know how to /not/ be in a relationship, and solo time helps him build a lot of self-worth and self-confidence outside of any kind of relationship at all. Laurie feels kinda bad he took it so hard and tries to be nice to him, and eventually they end up p close friends and it’s very good for both of them.

Nancy is excited to learn fighting tips from David, Yui, and Laurie and pursues it with a vigor. They are all impressed but especially Yui is. Nancy’s very passionate and forceful when she has to be and has a lot of pride, but is also very willing to be humble when she thinks she should be/someone knows more than her about whatever area, and Yui really likes that about her and is interested by it, and she and Nancy kind of slowly become best friends. They vibe really well because they operate similarly.

One of the ST kids mentions a song Quentin likes and he gets really excited they might be into his kind of music, and then finds out Nancy isn’t deep into any specific genre and Steve likes top 50 hits and they’re both like “It sucks for you it’s us and not Jonathan bc you have the exact same taste” and Quentin’s like :’-] “damn it.” He definitely teases Steve for some of the bops he likes, but like, in a lighthearted friend way, and it’s a rapport they get--throwing not-seriously-meant-at-all jabs about music that always devolves into “That one’s actually really good,” “Oh yeah?” “Oh totally you’d really like it. The baseline is like--” “--oh is it crunch?” “Oh, /hell/ yeah.” 

Yui is super unhappy about being stuck here, because she dedicated a lot of her life to being a spokesperson about violence against women and stopping it, and now she’s trapped in hell where she and everyone else get cut up and killed constantly and she can do very little to help them. That manifests as anger instead of depression though, and she is a /spitfire/ in trials. Girl will throw hands at the drop of a hat if it has even a small chance of helping the gang make it out. Some of the killers (Legion, Michael, Pig, Wraith) start to dread getting her because she /will/ kick their ass. Like, she won’t win, ever, because the realm is stacked, but she /will/ injure you. She’s like, the one killers start to request /not/ to get. 

Some of the killers fight back at this though, and Yui ends up getting super tunneled and injured and soloed out to be hurt, and even tortured a few times, and that is really hard for her. I mean, torture and violence are hard on anyone. But not only does she get punished for fighting as hard as she can for her friends in a hopeless situation by enduring a bunch of awful violence, she also feels like she can’t be candid about how bad it was or ask for much help because she doesn’t want anyone to think she’s beaten or weak or will be deterred by this, or for them to see her any differently--she /really/ doesn’t want to be seen as a victim. She’s a fighter. And she keeps fighting, though she slacks off a little gradually with how aggressive she is both to help the team and because how much she’s enduring as punishment is unbearable, which makes her feel a lot of self-loathing and like she’s letting herself down.

A lot of people try to help her because they know she’s not doing so well, but this makes her feel worse because she doesn’t want them to notice at all. Quentin finally is able to get her to talk a little by just being /super/ candid about how he’s felt about stuff that’s happened to him, even the ugly feelings, and sharing details/vulnerability with her, and that helps her a /lot/ because there’s at least one person she can talk to some. She doesn’t have anyone she tells everything or most of everything to until much later though, after Nancy becomes her friend. Once they’re really, really close, she eventually tells Nancy the truth, then immediately wishes she hadn’t, but Nancy handles it really well and gives her good advice and is super honest about how much Yui’s strength and selflessness inspire her, and that hearing all this she’s been going through and how awful it’s been and that she’s still doing all this in spite of what a war that is inside her just makes her even more impressed and see how utterly outclassed she is in bravery and how much work she has to do to get close to where Yui is, and it helps a whole lot, and they were already best friends, but they are /incredibly/ close after that night. Yui also opens up more to some of the others and is more okay asking for help, although she stays pretty guarded about how hard things feel.

Once she hears what Rin is, Yui feels terrible for her. She tries to keep small gifts on her she has no idea if Rin would like or even be /able/ to enjoy, and when she gets Rin in a trial, she’ll leave them for her/in her pockets. She has no idea if this means anything, but she’s miserable for the Onryo and wants to be able to help, even if she really can’t. She’s similarly very sympathetic to any killer she finds out was lied to or is not in control of their own actions, like Lisa and Philip. Detests all the serial killer/torture killers to a level on par with the vicious hatred the creator of the “ i fucking hate jurgen leitner “ video feels towards Jurgen Leitner. Gets along really well with Kate, Tapp, and David bc they similarly want JUSTICE and cannot get it.

Zarina shows up in realm and is like “Un-fucking believable. I try to uncover the truth about a cover up and I get kidnapped by an eldritch demon. That figures.” She’s distressed life has yet again been like “No, f you in particular Zarina,” but she is determined to help the others stuck there, and /very/ determined to find a way to escape. Gets along well with Jane, Jake, Dwight, and Adam right away, because she and Jane have a lot of “Oh something like that happened to me!” kinds of stories to share with each other, Adam’s curiosity vibes with hers, and Dwight and Jake lead the “Escape Planning Time” discussions.

After she learns enough second-hand about Dwight to know he was way less cool before and fixed his life, she likes him even more and has a kind of kinship with him and mentions how she kind of hid from who she was and lost herself in even feeling shame about her identity and how hard but invaluable becoming who she is now was, and how proud she is of herself. It’s a super relief for Dwight to meet someone as cool and good as her who comes up to him and goes “Hey we’re the same!” because he still worries about himself and how he’s doing. Gives him a lot of peace of mind and they are bros.

When she realizes Caleb Quinn is a killer in the realm, Zarina is thrown for a huge loop. She’s still curious if the stories about him are lies, but uh, getting murdered by him doesn’t exactly make her feel very warmly towards him and she kind of loses a lot of enthusiasm about it, until she hears him mutter his old boss’s name (which she remembers from her investigation) hatefully under his breath while attacking Jeff, as if he is talking /to/ his boss, and she starts running observation point with some of the others and figures out that he’s hallucinating who he sees. Eventually she executes an elaborate mid-trial “Hey you’re being lied to” that works well enough he actually figures out the Entity has been manipulating him hardcore. It does not change much on their end, sadly, once he knows? Caleb is out of rotation for a while, then goes back into it with very little change in how he hunts them, although he is somewhat less brutal/isn’t excessively cruel, and is more scarred than before. He also definitely avoids Zarina specifically and if he has a go after this person or her choice, always goes after the other person. He’s a long time violent criminal so he’s ofc not like, reformed by being informed he was being used, but Caleb hates being used more than anything else, and it’s happened a lot, so in a “honor among” something way, he tries to pay her back by only hunting her when there isn’t someone else to hunt. She is simultaneously annoyed by this and curious/hopeful that maybe it means there is some slim chance the dude has some humanity left, but she remains unsure.

Zarina joins the support squad of Adam, Claudette, and Quentin during trials, and enjoys hanging with them and picking up skills from the more seasoned members. 

She is also /super/ interested in trying to solve the realm and how it works, and asks people for detail on everything they know and takes copious notes. She’s fascinated by Benedict Baker, whom she hasn’t met, and starts collecting everything he has written that she can find, and begins journaling some in a similar fashion to record things she discovers or guesses. She likes to interview her friends about themselves, and they find it kind of awkward and odd at first, but get to really appreciating having their experiences listened to and recorded. It makes them feel more like their existences and suffering and hopes and pasts all matter.

Cheryl was traumatized before even /getting/ to the realm. She’s pretty closed off about her personal backstroy, because uh, it’s a /lot/, and it’s heavy af. She’s kind of nervous and paranoid people will want to use or hurt her if they know what she is, because it’s happened in the past, so she’s very skittish about deep relationships and divulging the truth.

This nature makes her click pretty well with Laurie, whose interests explicitly do not involve prying. They’ve also both been through a lot of trauma and don’t like people to know the details, so they are pretty happy just being silently in each others’ company.

After she has an especially bad nightmare she wakes up from screaming about the fourth time, Quentin hesitantly starts trying to get to know her and walk the balance beam of “I want to know what’s going on so I can help” and “I don’t want to pry.” He and she confide in each other some, albeit pretty vaguely, but it helps. They’ve both got a lot of guilt over stuff that isn’t their fault and endless nightmares and are very empathetic/altruistic people, and it’s probably that overlap that gets Min and Nea god-tier invested in Cheryl’s welfare after a couple months of her steadily proving she is not getting very close to anyone, and almost seems to think she deserves this hell and will never escape it.

On basically wild impulse alone and too much chaotic energy, Nea and Min decide to make looking out for and forcing Cheryl to hang w them a pet project. She’s super confused and nervous at first, and doesn’t want to drag anyone down with her, but the girls are nothing if not persistent, and she kind of slowly comes more out of her shell and starts to laugh and smile some and very slowly decides they don’t have any ulterior motives and so far nothing bad has happened to them because of her, so maybe it’s okay. David and Kate also like Cheryl a lot--initially probably because she reminds them some of Quentin, who they’re both very fond of, but then after they know her better just because they really like her herself as a person. Everyone likes Cheryl, but some are much better than others at trying to be friends with her. A lot of the high-energy ones kind of are overwhelming for her, at least at first, and she’s got so much despair and guilt and disappointment in herself that the less vocal ones she tends to read as not liking her even though they’re just quiet. This slowly improves though, and she ends up much happier and less alone.

When some of them finally get /part/ of her life story, everyone is overwhelmingly horrified for her. The whole group turns into a Cheryl Protection Squad for the next like 6 months. She is overwhelmed and confused and mildly distressed by this, but also happy and moved on a “I want to go find somewhere to cry alone” kind of level because after all she’s been through, it’s dragged back to hell again she’s the happiest she’s been since she was a kid.

I’m gonna stop here bc that’s a lot, but hope you enjoyed these! : )

[returnn-of-the-mac]

Companions react to Sole thinking they’re only useful to the cause. So apologizing for getting hurt or fatally wounded because it means there will be work unfinished, mission failure, medical supplies wasted, etc. If you include the faction leaders too I’ll give you my first born and the smashed fragments of my heart.

Thank you @aintnoonefancy and @merpoi. So here is one of the longer, two-in-one reacts! To be honest, I struggled incorporating the wax-on, wax-off lesson into the writing— I’m sorry. I tried to think of a way to squeeze it in there, but I just couldn’t. I have them doing undignified settler work though. If I do think of a way to add in the lesson, I will make an update/part 2 and link it here. And yes, the companions are romanced. There’s not much fluff involved because I didn’t want to force anything, but it is subtly hinted. Sorry about that! Please enjoy! 😊 (side note: I have deliberately chosen to exlude Father and X6-88 from this react because it would be out of their character to help any “surface dwellers.” I felt like they would straight up refuse)

FO4 Companions React: Sole Getting Injured & Companions Helping With Settler Work

After an intense battle with the Gunners in Quincy that almost resulted in death, Sole wound up in a local clinic in critical condition.

Despite this, Sole continued to worry about the people of the Commonwealth— so much so that they felt guilty for being temporarily bedridden and unable to help. This burden was weighing on Sole, and they eventually revealed their feelings to their companions.

...

Preston

“General, you have done so much for these people, you deserve a break,” Preston explained, “And if we start falling behind on projects and running short on supplies, the settlers will be more than willing to chip in some extra time and resources.

Sole nodded, and Preston grinned.

“Please get some rest. I’ll go let the others know what’s going on. I’ll take care of things while you’re gone. Thank you for everything you do for us, babe.”

Codsworth:

“Oh, come on, [sir/mum]! The people will be fine, I’m sure,” the Mr. Handy reassured, “They are autonomous.”

Sole rolled their eyes. Honestly, they sometimes doubted that.

Codsworth sighed.

“Will it make you feel better if I were to lend them a hand in your absence?”

Sole nodded.

“Then consider it done!”

Piper:

“Aw, stop it, Blue!” Piper demanded, “You work hard every single day to keep the Commonwealth in one piece. Maybe you should take a step back and let the public solve their own problems. You need the rest.”

Sole frowned.

“I don’t want to mention that you’re in rough shape because if that information falls into the wrong hands, it could be bad. Really bad,” The reporter explained, “So how about I make an odd job or volunteer work column in my paper this week? That way, things can still get done while you’re recovering. I can also help out with some of the work, too.”

Nick:

“I can almost guarantee the Commonwealth won’t burn to the ground if you take a few days to yourself,” Nick commented, “Besides, how are you supposed to help the people if you can’t even help yourself? You need to give yourself some time to heal.”

Sole sighed in defeat. Nick was always right.

“Look, I’m sorry if that sounded harsh but I’m worried about you. Take care of yourself, [name]. I don’t want to see you work yourself to an early grave. You get some rest. I’ll do the dirty work until you’re up for it again.”

Curie:

“Non. You are not going back to work, [Madame/Monsieur]. You must get zome rest and recover vrom your injuries,” Curie insisted, “I will make zure I can get you ‘ealthy as quickly as possible, but you need to take a break. Burdening yourzelf with work will only make your condition worse. Please trust me.”

Sole sighed.

“Eef you are zo worried, I will ‘elp ze zettlers whike you are recovering.”

Gage:

“Why are ya so worried about the stupid settlers, babe? Those helpless simpletons need tah learn a thing or two about fighting anyway.”

Sole stared daggers at Gage, prompting the raider to raise his hands in defense.

“Hey, don’t look at me like that. I’m just tellin it like it is. Cold hard facts. They’re useless. And before you ask: no. I’m not helping them.”

Sole and Gage bickered for nearly a half-hour before the raider finally surrendered.

“Fuck! Fine, boss. Ya want me to help those incompetent morons, I’ll help them.”

Hancock:

“You’ve gotta take a break, gorgeous. Let the people take care of themselves, yanno?” Hancock stated, huffing some jet. Sole rolled their eyes at his nonchalant response, and the ghoul immediately sensed that they did not like his answer.

“Look, I know you're for the people. I get it. I really do. But you’ve gotta put yourself first sometimes. You’re gonna end up burning yourself out. I know that feeling all too well,” Hancock continued, “I can take care of the settlers for ya while you’re recovering, you dig? I promise I’m not going to let your settlements burn to the ground.”

Sole sighed in defeat, and the ghoul smirked.

“Thanks for not resisting, [brother/sis]. I gotchu.”

Maccready:

“Who cares about the settlers? You’re injured,” MacCready spat, “You need to take care of yourself.”

Sole protested and their lover put his hands over his ears.

“I’m not listening.”

Typical childish behavior. The merc really knew how to grind Sole’s gears.

After a few moments, MacCready removed his hands from his head and began to speak again.

“Don’t you think it’s about time these settlers learn to take care of themselves? I mean come on. How are these settlements going to last if they can’t even stand on their own two feet? They’re adults for crying out loud,” MacCready continued, heated, “ If Little Lamplight— a settlement run by me and a bunch of kids— could defend itself, why can’t the mungos do it? What’s so hard?”

Sole suggested that MacCready look after the settlements in their absence, considering he did such a good job running Little Lamplight.

The merc huffed.

“Fine. If that’s what it takes for you to get better, I’ll do it. But don’t think I’m going to enjoy it.”

Longfellow:

“C’mon kiddo. Relax. Rest up. Have a damn drink,” Longfellow suggested, holding up a bottle of rum in one hand and whiskey in the other, “Pick your poison.”

Sole sighed and the haborman shrugged.

“Something stronger?” he mixed the two drinks, but Sole held up their hand in protest, “Well, more for me then.”

After a few moments of silence, Longfellow spoke.

“This isn’t like you, kid. What’s wrong?”

Sole voiced their concerns to their companion, who sighed in response.

“To be blunt, these people shouldn’t have to be babied. They should be able to defend themselves,” he set the empty liquor bottles on the ground, “But I know how much this means to you, so I guess I can help you out a little bit. Maybe whip these settlers into shape.”

Strong:

“Human weak right now,” Strong commented, “Need to be strong again.”

Sole insisted that they were fine and sat up, but Strong shoved them back down.

“No human. Need sleep.”

Sole told Strong that they had to help the settlers, and the Supermutant shook his head.

“Strong said ‘no,’ human. Strong understand human help find milk. But human needs rest now. Strong will find milk on own for now. Strong help settlers.”

Cait:

“Rest up darlin. Don’t worry about the bloody settlers,” Cait insisted, “They can deal with their own shite.”

Sole insisted that the settlers needed their help, but Cait was not having it.

“Quit yer yimmering! Those damn settlers can fend for themselves.”

Sole begged their companion to show some compassion, but the redhead was stubborn. After a few minutes, however, Cait gave in.

“Fine. But only because I love ye.”

Danse:

“You can’t go back to work now. You need to recover.”

Sole argued that he was being hypocritical, and the Paladin frowned.

“No. We are discussing two entirely different scenarios. I’m the commanding officer of my ground squad. I am...er...was...essential for order in combat. If my brothers were to be ambushed without me to guide them, it would be detrimental to our cause,” Danse continued, “You are the overseer of several settlements, all of which contain settlers who are perfectly capable of defending themselves. They’ve just gotten complacent.”

Sole couldn’t deny the fact that the settlers had, in fact, become significantly more needy ever since they had taken over.

Danse sighed.

“If it makes you feel any better, I suppose I could help the settlers with some of their...affairs. Just please get some rest, [name].”

Maxson:

“Like mentor, like soldier I see,” Maxson scoffed, “You two never know when to quit. If only we knew what it was, I would have assigned you to another higher-up. Maybe you would have been more sensible. But I digress. You need to recover, Paladin. And that’s why I’m ordering you to stay in bed and rest.”

Sole protested but Maxson shook his head.

“No, I don’t want to hear it,” The Elder asserted, “That was an order. You are officially on leave until further notice. This directive is non-negotiable.”

Sole grumbled and Maxson continued.

“There are pressing matters I must attend to back on the Prydwen. But during your absence, I suppose I can spare an Initiate to assist your settlements with anything they may need.”

Deacon:

“Easy there, masochist,” Deacon teased, “You’re injured. I don’t care how much you enjoy torturing yourself. Take a break, buddy.”

Sole rolled their eyes, and Deacon stuck his tongue out.

He could be so infuriating.

“Listen. If babysitting the settlers is all it takes to get you to stay still, I gotchu,” he claimed, “Mama Deacon will keep all of the settlers in line. No problem.”

Sole was hesitant, but eventually caved. How bad could it be?

Desdemona:

“Please, take your health more seriously,” Desdemona scolded, “You need rest.”

Sole frowned, but did not want to argue with the Railroad leader. They knew there would be no point.

“Now, to ensure that you don’t worry yourself sick, I have—” Desdemona rubbed her temples, “-- I have assigned Deacon to help you with the labor. Unfortunately, he was our only option.”

Sole pursed their lips and Desdemona shrugged.

“I know it’s not ideal, but it’s the best I could do. I apologize.”

…

Preston:

Since Preston spent most of his time helping the settlers in Sanctuary, he was no stranger to farming.

In fact, he sometimes preferred farming to running the place. Having the ability to be outdoors and tend to plants was a welcomed change to his usual responsibilities of locating struggling settlements and dispatching Sole.

Codsworth:

Codsworth hummed to himself as he maintained the settlers’ community garden. Like Preston, he was already accustomed to helping the residents of Sanctuary with menial work. He was just happy that he could indirectly help Sole as they recovered from their injuries.

Piper:

“Phew,” Piper breathed, wiping beads of sweat from her forehead, “Farming is a lot harder than I had thought. I really need to get into better shape, don’t I?”

The reporter continued digging trenches and planting seeds for another hour before she plopped onto the ground.

“Oy vey! I need a break.”

She then noticed a large tear in her jacket.

“Dammit. This was my favorite coat, too. How the heck does [name] do this day in and day out?”

Nick:

Nick was deep in thought as he weeded a cluster of tomatoes in one of the planters behind one of the restored houses.

“This is exactly how Jenny had her garden set up,” the detective stated, taking a quick glance around the fenced-in area, “Brings back memories of caring for it. We made the best damn salad on the block.”

Nick paused and studied the vegetables, deciding that they were, in fact, ready to be harvested.

He smiled.

“I bet a fresh salad would be just what these people need to lighten their spirits. Good thing I still remember the recipe.”

Curie:

“Je suis toute seule encore une fois, sans une ami, sans rien à faire,” Curie sang, watering a planter containing young carrot sprouts, “Je suis pas pressée de retrouver ma solitude et ma misère.”

She stopped watering to take a look around her, appreciating the world around her. From the warm sunshine, to the cawing of crows, to the gentle autumn breeze that swept through Sanctuary. It was a rare moment of peace.

“I wish my love were ‘ere to zee zis,” Curie mused, “Eet ees truly a beautiful day. I wish I could zpend eet wiz zem.”

Gage:

“Ugh. Farmin. Reminds me of my childhood.”

Gage chewed on a piece of straw as he dug a hole for a corn crop.

“Heh. I wonder how mad the boss would be if I tried to ransack this settlement,” he questioned,

looking around swiftly and sizing up the settlers, “It would be a fuckin piece of cake. These people are weak.”

He shook his head.

“Nah. I can’t. Babe would kill me. Put my head on a stake like Nisha and her gang. I’m not lookin to be a human kabob.”

Hancock:

“This is so mundane,” Hancock mumbled, raking carrot seeds across dry soil.

He suddenly had an idea and looked around mischievously.

“Heh. Babe would definitely disapprove, but imma spice this up a wee bit.”

He injected himself with some Daddy-O and patiently waited for it to kick in. It didn’t take long at all.

The ground suddenly began wobbling and the sky turned a pretty shade of strobe-light-rainbow.

“Yes,” Hanock stated, a shit-eating grin plastered on his face, “Yes. This is much more fun.”

The seeds he had previously been raking started hopping up and down and cheering for him.

“Who’s the best seed daddy?” Hanock called, “I’m the best seed daddy!”

A crowd of confused and slightly disturbed settlers gathered around the ghoul who was currently screaming at the ground.

Sole sure did have some strange friends.

MacCready:

“I thought I’d be leading, not farming,” MacCready complained, “I’ve been duped.”

The merc scowled as he dug holes and planted seeds for hours on end.

“This is so pointless,” he complained, “We already have plenty of corn. Why do we need more? I hope we get attacked. I need some action.”

Longfellow:

“What will we do with a drunken sailor? What will we do with a drunken sailor? What would we do with a drunken sailor Early in the mornin!” Longfellow sang as he watered the tomato crop.

“Way hay and up she rises! Way hay and up she rises! Way hay and up she rises early in the mornin!”

The harborman pulled out a whiskey and popped the cap off, taking a violent swing. He then had an idea.

“I’m sure spirits will perk these withered tomatoes up.”

He proceeded to shower the crop in liquor.

“Shave his belly with a rusty razor! Shave his belly with a rusty razor! Shave his belly with a rusty razor! Early in the mornin!”

Strong:

“Strong dig, and dig, and dig. Strong shouldn’t be digging. Strong should be smashing!”

It was then that a crow decided to swoop down upon the corn crop, and pluck some kernels from the grain.

“Hey! Bird no eat crop! Crop for humans!” Strong bellowed, picking up the shovel and whacking the bird with it.

He knocked the poor crow into an eternal slumber.

“Stupid birds no get past Strong. Strong is strong.”

Cait:

“This is dumb,” Cait complained, harvesting some mutfruit, “What’s the point of this, even? These people can’t even pick their own damn fruit? I have better things to do.”

Cait walked away from the garden and headed toward the Sanctuary bar. She made it about halfway there when she began having second thoughts.

“After all [name] has done for me, the least I can do is pick some fruit,” The redhead looked back in the direction of the garden and sighed, “I can’t just leave this work unfinished. Gotta show my love somehow, ye?”

Danse:

“Why am I stuck digging holes? I’d much rather be on lookout duty,” Danse grumbled, “I’m more qualified for that anyway.”

The Paladin reached into his pockets and pulled out a handful of seeds, tossing them into the fresh holes.

“At least this is a good upper body workout,” he listened to the sound of the wind, “And it’s unusually peaceful.”

The former Paladin used this rare moment of silence to let his mind wander.

This menial farm work is definitely an inconvenience. But at least helping these settlers is putting [name] at ease. For that reason alone, it’s all worth it.

Deacon:

Deacon was decked out in farmhand clothes and a straw hat as he raked seeds across the soil.

“I could get used to this. Maybe I should take up farming as a hobby,” He kissed one of the little sprouts in front of him, “Right, Violet?”

The Railroad agent took a few steps backwards and felt something under his foot. He looked down in horror to see that he had accidentally crushed one of his precious baby saplings.

“Noooo! Daisy! I’m so sorry!” he wailed.

He quickly straightened the plant and breathed a sigh of relief when he saw that it was still alive.

“Phew. That was a close one.”

[thetruthaboutlovecomesat3am]

Endgame fix-it fic, Blackhill

SPOILERS for Endgame, obviously!

Prompt by @kirayun : Steve returns the Soul Stone and Natasha is brought back.

“Let me go,” Natasha says. “It’s okay.”

It isn’t. But Clint knows what she means. His kids need him, Laura needs him. And Natasha, she has to get him back to his family and to give him the chance to atone for the things he’s done. A second chance. Like the one he gave her a long time ago in Budapest. She has to pay back this debt she owes him, even if it’s with her own life.

“Love is for children. I owe him a debt.”

She doesn’t believe that anymore. Love can be a strength. It can be salvation, it can be the best thing to ever happen to you. She’s glad she got to do that. That she got to fall in love, that she got to lose it. After all, sometimes you only know the price of an old trinket you lost once you’re buying it back from the pawn shop; you can only measure the value of something by the things you’re willing to do to get it back.

Natasha is more than willing to do this.

“It’s okay,” she says.

She doesn’t say the rest. The “she doesn’t need me” and “she’ll move on” and “I’m okay with dying if it saves her” but Clint knows. Of course he does, he feels the same. Except, his family needs him. Natasha’s doesn’t. It’s an easy choice, really. Yet, it’s the hardest thing he’s ever had to do.

It turns out to be suffocating. He can’t look at his son named after the woman who gave her life to save the universe. He can’t look at Laura because of the things he’s done after he lost her. He absolutely cannot look at Maria Hill.

At Tony’s funeral she is standing there, dark circles under her eyes, and his hands shake when he remembers telling her what happened, why Nat isn’t there, he remembers Maria pushing at his chest, not believing him, not forgiving him.

He made a lot of hard choices he never came to regret. What if this easy one is the one he can never recover from?

Wanda tells him “They both know” and he tries to believe it for his own sake.

When Maria apologizes for the things she said, they both pretend she wasn’t perfectly right in blaming him. They both know if Maria had been standing on that cliff beside Natasha, Natasha would be the one attending the funeral. Maria would’ve saved her. But he was there instead, and that is something they both will have to live with.

//

Steve gets to her right before Fury starts the car. He taps the glass and leans in when she rolls down the window.

“I just wanted you to know. She said something to me about moving forward.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes. She said, me first. Then her.”

Maria smiles but it’s hollow and sad, maybe even bitter.

“Then move forward. You promised her. At least keep half of that deal alive.”

Steve doesn’t know how he can do that, when he’s always felt so stuck in the past.

“Yes, ma’am,” he says. Because what is one more broken promise at this point.

//

It has been five years, give or take a couple of weeks, since she has set foot inside the apartment she used to call home.

Her fingers tremble so much she has to stop trying to open the front door and try again five minutes later, after the shaking has somewhat subsided. She thinks the hardest part will be stepping inside. She is so wrong.

There’s a picture of them smiling right next to the bowl where her keys go. She hasn’t even closed the door behind her yet and she wants to leave already, to not have to do this, to not be the one left here alone.

Natasha has done it five years. Five years. She’s been dealing with this five days and she’s about ready to burn the world to the ground.

She drops the keys and takes the picture and walks to the couch, sighing as she slumps down.

“You were so strong for everyone else. They didn’t know, of course, except Steve and Clint. But you’ve managed. You’ve kept fighting. You’ve been the leader the world needed you to be. And I’m so proud of you.”

Natasha smiles at her from behind the glass and she clutches the frame harder the longer she stares at it.

“You’ll forgive me, won’t you? You’ll have to. Because I can’t move on. I won’t. I’ve promised to love you for the rest of my life. I wish... we’d had more time, or that we hadn’t wasted such a big chunk of it being stubborn first or apart lately. You have been... my greatest adventure. I’d do anything for you, anything. But not this. Not move forward. You were the love of my life. I have to believe you would forgive me this, if I can forgive you for leaving me.”

Natasha keeps smiling from the picture and Maria decides right then she’s going to remember her like that: smiling, happy, at peace. She doesn’t want to know how great she was in all those years when grief and sadness fueled her. She’s rather remember the day Natasha found a penny on the sidewalk, petted the best dog alive (her own assessment) and took that selfie of them smiling like happiness was always going to last and Maria feels the echo of it now, laughing at her. Happiness can be cruel, too. The memory of it at least.

She tries to remember it anyway.

//

There are no support groups this time around. No fields with mass graves to remember the fallen. There are no fallen.

Just two names that nobody dares saying out loud anymore. Tony. Natasha.

They buried one, there is nothing they can bury for the other. Just grief. A lot of it, for a few of them.

There’s anger, hot and blinding. Bitterness, regret, guilt. A lot of that going around, a lot of it.

Maria wonders if she knew. If any of them did. Maybe Tony could’ve, she can’t really ask him, can’t really yell at him anymore. Maybe none of them knew. Maybe it was just random, just a game of chance that they were the ones going to the cliff. It is suspicious how well it worked out that they were the ones to be send after that stone, when a lot of other combinations would’ve been unfitting. Lucky them, just the right two people went, two best friends who loved each other. One of them to die and one to bring the stone back.

The anger consumes her most days. Denial and bargaining aren’t really her things and she won’t be ready for depression for a long time, so she nurses the anger, saves it as much as she can, tries to go back to the harsh, cold woman she used to be before S.H.I.E.L.D. She fails. Of course she does, Natasha changed her very core. Se used to be grateful for it, now it’s just another open door that lets the pain in.

She comes to miss the anger, eventually. She wakes up one day and there’s a void in her chest that anger can’t fill up anymore. So she tries with other things; resentment, hate, coldness, whiskey. The void stays stubbornly empty, and eventually, it slowly starts to fill itself with sadness and longing.

She has an army of superheroes on her contact list, and there is still absolutely nothing she can hope to do. And she’s never felt more powerless in her life.

They brought back half the people, half the life of the universe. They can't bring back the one life that matters the most to her.

//

Falcon is talking to Steve and Bucky is watching them close by. Bruce, for a lack of a better thing to do to seem busy while he’s just waiting around, is aimlessly fidgeting with the Quantum Time Machine switches. It’s technically a mistake, but it was technically also planned, because Bucky is running to him and frantically telling him to open another portal. That Steve has given one of his charges to someone else. Someone who should be appearing in his place any second now.

Any second.

Banner says he’s been turning the portal on and off a few times and nothing is happening, that nothing is coming through. Bucky insists, because he’s sure.

They just... have wait a moment longer because miracles take time, but really, any moment now.

She’ll be back any moment.

//

There's a dent in the living room wall, three inches above the tv. Natasha threw an Hydra spy against it after Maria fought him around the apartment without even scratching a piece of furniture. The second Natasha came home and stepped into the fight a wall got smashed. Maria established two rules that day: no fighting villains in their home and whomever destroys something while breaking rule number one has to fix it themselves.

Maria has no idea why it bothers her to look at it. She keeps thinking Natasha found a way to get out of doing it herself, she keeps thinking she probably hadn’t done it in five years because Maria wasn’t there to nag her, or maybe because even the idea of getting too close to it made her think about Maria too much, about their silly arguments that ended with them laughing on the couch, about how they chased that childish happiness for a lifetime and it got ripped away from them after such a short taste.

She can’t stand that dent. She’s in the middle of fixing it when someone knocks on her door. She doesn’t answer. Her cheeks are stained with paint and tears and there’s a Natasha shaped hole in her chest that is just about to start bleeding. She needs to be alone for this.

When the knocking doesn’t repeat itself a second time she thinks she succeeded. But then. But then she hears a key turning and the door opens even if she’s been begging fate it would stay shut.

Clint does a good job of pretending he doesn't notice her red eyes.

“We have to go.”

“Where?”

“Maria. We have to go.”

There's a cocktail of anger and resentment and grief raising up from her stomach and she's just about ready to spit it out like venom, to argue just for the sake of it, or maybe to just beg to be left alone. They can deal with whatever crisis this is on their on.

But then, she sees a look in his eyes that she knows well.

He had that look in 2008 when Natasha got injured in Munich and again in 2011 when she got shot at in Rio. When he went to tell Maria Natasha was all kinds of messed up, but she was going to be okay, eventually. They were just friends back then, but Clint... he knew. Maybe he had always known, somehow. They were never really just friends, were they?

Something scary starts to fill the void in her chest. Something ominous and frightening, a lot more than grief or sadness. Hope.

//

The woods are silent. The leaves under her feet make noises that she doesn't even register, the only thing she's trying to hear is if, amongst the voices coming from ahead, there's Natasha's too. She walks numbly, Clint guides her, says comforting things and coos her along. Maria feels something like dread, something like hope, everything's mixed up inside her and she doesn't know if she believes this is happening.

Hulk-Banner is pressing buttons and tuning everything again. Sam is pacing. Bucky is smiling at Steve and they're talking quietly, but stop when Maria gets there.

Banner presses another button. Or maybe it's the same one again. “So, were you and Natasha close?”

Sam looks at him sideways.

“What? It's a legitimate question; Clint brought her.”

“How long ago was she supposed to be here?” Clint asks, straight to the point in a way Maria can't be, because the last thread of hope she's clinging to is much too fragile to be put to the test in such a harsh way.

“Ninety minutes, give or take?” Sam guesses.

“Steve left about ninety minutes ago, yes,” Bucky confirms.

“No,” Steve shakes his head. “No, no.”

“Yeah, maybe ninety-five,” Banner nods.

“We timed it with a small delay. So if I left ninety-five minutes ago, she's about to get here in five minutes or so.”

“Why?” Bucky asks, a little surprised.

“It's an eighty minutes ride from Clint's New York apartment to here. Ten minutes you waited to call him because I had to explain. Ten minutes for him to stop for Maria. So, if I left ninety-five minutes ago, she'll be here in five minutes.”

“Ninety-six now,” Sam says.

“Why would she wait for Clint to be here?” Banner asks.

“She said to me, when I brought her back,” Steve starts to explain, “she said, and I quote: she'll give me so much crap you were the first person I saw back from the dead, at least let her be the second, since she's always been the first any other time. And I said, what about Red Skull? And she said, well, then let her be the third, it's still the podium.”

“I'm sorry, what?!” Sam looks baffled.

“Oh yeah, Red Skull was there. He was the first big villain I fought back in '45, he was a Nazi and HYDRA. It's a long story, but somehow for some reason he's guarding the Soul Stone now.”

Maria thinks old age suits Steve well. The way he talks and explains things now is just so him somehow, this really seem to have worked out well. Much more than she thought it had when Clint explained this to her on the way over.

“No, not that, although that is weird. I meant, any other time?” Sam asks.

“Yes, after Munich,” Clint nods.

“And Rio,” Maria adds. “She died in Rio, too.”

“What about Florence?”

“Then, too. Waited three days for her to wake up after surgery without leaving the room.”

“And then there was Belfast-”

“Oh, don't remind me. I really thought she was done for good there. And the time in Beijing when-”

“Okay, so she almost died a lot, is what I'm hearing,” Sam stops them. “And you were there when she woke up, so it's some sort of tradition.”

Maria nods. “She never stayed dead two weeks, though. So if she- if she comes back, I can look past the fact I wasn't there this time around.”

They stare at the empty air for what feels like an eternity. And as the seconds pass Maria wonders what is she doing there. Even if Natasha is indeed alive, she wouldn't want her to be there, with their friends, waiting like a lost soul for her anchor to reality to be back. On the other hand, Natasha has waited a hour and a half in a wasteland to be sure Maria was there when she got back, so maybe, just maybe-

It's not like the snap of a finger.

There's no dust- or reverse dust, or whatever. There's just empty air and a moment later the air isn't empty anymore.

Her hair is longer. Red at the roots. It suits her, half blonde, half red, it's pretty. Maria feels mesmerized by it. By Natasha. By Natasha being alive.

Her first step is wobbly, uncertain. She falls into Maria's arms and Maria holds her up and she feels herself laugh and she can hear Sam and Bucky laugh too. She can't see them, the tears in her eyes make the world blurred. But she hears Clint whispers something close to a thank you and then his arms are surrounding them and Maria is kissing Natasha's pretty hair and for once, just this once, it seems like it's going to work out exactly right.

//

“So we kept missing each other, before for work, then I was a fugitive, then you were dust, then I was dead-”

“Yes, but now we're both here, in our apartment. Together. Safe. Hopefully for more than five minutes.”

“You know, Steve and I, we made a deal.”

“Did you?”

“He moved on, then I moved on. I hear he got married and all.”

“Not really moved on, Nat. He went back in time to marry his first love, if anything that's the opposite of mov-”

“Maria?”

“Yeah?”

“I have a ring, somewhere. It's been five years, it'll take a minute to find it, but I'm sure I have it around the apartment somewhere. Or, I can buy you a new one. Because I'd like to get married to my last love, now. Is that okay with you?”

“Uh, yeah. Yes. I'd say that is more than okay with me.”

[triple-a-enderdragon]

Hey, guys, I’m just itching to tell you

First | Previous | Next

It was a crisp, bright day. Stress was out on her castle wall, gazing south. Visibility was good enough she could swear a hint of green was just noticeable. Usually seeing the shared lab brought her joy— as did the man she shared it with— but now it just worried her. She knew Iskall's role was demanding and he handled it well, but she also knew his track record with the Nether all too well. Thinking of Iskall made her think of Python, also trapped in the oppressive hell-scape. As far as Stress knew, no one spent more than a day straight in the Nether, with good reason. Well, except Tango, but he was an exception.

Stress looked at her hands. They were always edged with frost, but lately they'd been feeling itchy. It was uncomfortable and persistent; the only thing she found to soothe the itch was to make ice, so whenever it got unbearable, that's what she did. So far she had made almost two shulker boxes worth of packed ice made straight from water, and it scared her. Making packed ice straight from water was exhausting. Or, at least, it used to be.

Lately, Stress was full of nervous energy to the point where she couldn't sleep. Tonight the phantoms would start spawning, and if she wasn't careful, she would join Xisuma and Cub. She absentmindedly scratched her hands.

Barking echoed behind her, getting louder. Three of her samoyeds, followed by two huskies, turned the corner and blazed past her before disappearing out of sight. Brought back to the present, Stress sighed. Everything would be fine in the end. It had to be. Besides, wings of the castle were still unfinished, and that she could do something about.

Oh, how her hands itched.

~~~

Grian loved flying. He had loved it before, with the elytra, and he'd gotten ridiculously good at it. But with wings? It was a whole new world! There was so much more control, so much more finesse. One of the first things he did once he was used to them was the elytra course. Unsurprisingly, he crushed it.

But as the days wore on, from all the news surrounding the Nether, Grian started to feel agitated. He tried to keep his hands busy working on his base, the Infinity Room, anything. But inevitably, he would find himself in the air, flying aimlessly over the main island and beyond.

He had so much restless energy he had gotten little sleep over the past few days, little enough he was worried about phantoms. And since he was in the air at seemingly every opportunity, it was only a matter of time before one caught up with him.

Why did his wings itch so much?

~~~

Staring at TFC, Impulse was the first to recover. "Are we looking for you?"

TCF gave a snort of laughter. "Well, I certainly was looking for you. Do you know how long that took? I assumed you were at Xisuma's base, so I took the rail system there." He nodded at Ren. "Fantastic system, by the way, even if it's not fully functional. But I didn't find you there. So I had to travel back. I don't think you understand how long it takes to travel on foot." Seeing the others' faces, TFC laughed. "Not that it matters, I got here eventually. Though I was a bit surprised to find you in Ren's base."

"How did you know to look here?" Impulse asked.

"I was going towards Tango's base first hoping to catch you there, but—" TFC looked at Tango. "—I could tell you were here."

Tango was confused. "Why would you be looking for me?"

The change in TFC's demeanor was subtle, but if the others somehow missed it, the change in his voice was unmistakable; softer, yet no less gruff. "Because we're the last piece to your puzzle. I am Earth, and this is my avatar."

~~~

False was trying to find Impulse. So far he'd not been at his base, so she was headed toward the next best location. Landing in Xisuma's base, she could tell it was empty. Where was Impulse? Probably tending to something else, he doesn't live in X's base, False. Nevertheless, she headed to the admin room; maybe he left her a note saying where he'd gone.

Entering the room, she scanned the monitors. There wasn't much of it she understood, but there was one thing she did; the red dot of an unauthorized spawn. Somehow, while everyone was distracted by the Nether, an intruder had slipped in. While her two flankers were preoccupied elsewhere.

Think, False, think! There wasn't much she could do about the Nether situation, but this was right up her alley. With her tracker currently unavailable, she had to fall on her backup.

Now finally with a clear purpose, False left X's base and flew west. A gliding silhouette greeted her as she neared her destination; Grian absentmindedly riding the thermals. False got his attention and followed him as he dived into his base.

Once on the floor, Grian asked, "So, what do you need? Is it the Nether again?"

"No, I need your help finding someone. An intrusion has been detected and I need to deal with it as soon as possible."

"My help? Don't you usually— oh. Right."

False sighed. "Sorry. Until this Nether problem's solved, I need you to do Iskall's job since you are quite good at finding people."

"No, no! It's no problem at all! I just hope you don't expect me to fight, as that's not exactly my strong suit."

"Oh don't worry. With our third party member, you won't be able to fight even if you wanted to."

With that, False sent out a message:

[falsesymmetry to: Biffa2001] You busy?

[Biffa2001 to: falsesymmetry] nothing that can't be interrupted

[flasesymmetry to: Biffa2001] Meet outside of iTrade?

[Biffa2001 to: falsesymmetry] o/

False turned to Grian, who was waiting expectantly. "Well, time to go to the shopping district."

~~~

As Grian and False landed in front of iTrade, they could see Biffa flying in from the east. As he landed, he didn't waste time on pleasantries.

"Who do you need dead? I'm ready."

Grian smothered a laugh as False sighed.

"Well, you're straight to the point. You don't even know if that's why I called you here."

"Why else would you need me? Unless you need something built? A cup of tea? Hm?"

False gave a small laugh. "Fine, you're right. A hopper has managed to slip in and I need you in case they're hostile."

Biffa lit up. "Finally! Is this Nether business what it takes for me to get in on the action?"

"Biffa, you've been 'in on the action'. Anyway, we shouldn't waste time. Stay close, you two."

False took to the air, with Biffa and Grian close behind.

~~~

"Wait, what?"

In a deathly silent room, Impulse was the first to speak. TFC— Earth? turned to him, scrutinizing every inch of the man.

"All right, I have some explaining to do. But that's for a later time, as time is something you don't have much of. For now, you have to stop Fire before he commits a grave mistake."

"Wait, was I right? About the other avatars?" asked Tango. "Stress and Grian?"

"Yes, wasn't it obvious? It was about time Air committed." Earth looked at Tango, concerned. "You must find them both before you confront your Element, and quickly."

"What happens if we don't stop him in time?"

But the man they were talking to was TFC once again.

"Sorry, he's cryptic like that. I don't know any more than you do." He gave a short laugh. "Anyway, good luck finding the others; I'll only slow you down. I'll be in my bunker when you need me."

~~~

Python was getting tired of the Nether. No matter what he and Iskall tried, no progress was made; he was starting to think they were well and truly stuck. Normally that would be fine, as he knew people who had survived in the Nether for weeks on end; but that was with proper preparation. Between the fluctuating heat and their dwindling water, the two Strikers were woefully unprepared.

Speaking of the heat, the temperature had risen again, to the point where it was dangerous for Python and downright deadly for Iskall. With the strangely hostile pigmen, they were content to stay in their cave anyway. Or, at least Python was.

He watched helplessly as Iskall became increasingly agitated as the two of them tried to work through their situation. When trying to create a new portal had failed, he'd injured his foot kicking it. He'd almost broken his flint and steel trying to relight portals, only stopping because one blew up, almost killing him.

The only thing Python could think to do was to keep Iskall confined to the cave. Being surrounded by the ice seemed to help cool his temperament as well as the air, but there was only so much of this confinement that either of them could take.

Hearing feverish muttering, Python turned to where Iskall was sitting. Something seemed to be wrong with his left eye, he was scratching at it, as if something was wrong.

Something was wrong; Iskall's eye was itchy as hell, to the point where he wanted to take the damn thing out. Every time he went to rip it out, something stopped him. But nothing was stopping the itching, the damn itching, get it out get it out—

"Iskall?"

He looked up to see Python incredibly concerned, so much so he momentarily forgot about the itch.

"What?"

"You okay?"

"No."

Silence, then; "You want to talk about it?"

"...it's my eye. It's bad enough we're stuck here for the time being, but the dang thing won't stop itching. It's driving me crazy, dude!"

"Has it done this before? I remember when I had a similar eyepiece, it would get irritated sometimes. Glad I got rid of it."

"No, that's the thing. It hasn't done this before." Muttering half to himself, Iskall continued, "And what does—" Diamond? He looked at Python. "You're not wearing your gear, are you? But you have your tools."

"Uh, yeah. It was getting a bit cumbersome, so I took it off. You could tell?"

"Yeah, that's part of what this thing does." Iskall paused, mind miles away. "I need to think." For him, the best way to think was to sleep; so that's precisely what he did.

~~~

Not far under the gardens of the Stock Exchange, Doc was working on his HRN station. He was working on a vending machine; something he'd wanted to put in for a while. Now that the war was over, he could finally return fully to his own projects. He felt he should be glad to work undistracted, but frustrations were mounting.

It was a simple circuit for him to work with, but novice mistakes were constantly popping up. Timings were off, a repeater would lock, a comparator would be wrongly set. He could tell from the flow of the redstone what was wrong and where, but with every fixed mistake another would pop up.

And his arm. What was up with his arm? Every time Doc stopped working, the metallic arm felt as if it was full of electricity; he was not sure how to describe it. He'd taken it apart more than once to check the wiring, the circuits, anything he could see for a hint as to what was wrong. As far as he could tell, everything was on order; from the redstone tubing to the circuitry. But every once and a while he would find himself scratching at it. An itch, that was it. His arm itched.

Between his arm and the vending machine circuit, Doc had not gotten much sleep. The constant flow of the red dust through its own tubing gave him the energy to work, so he wasn't worried. However, there was one night terror he would do well to remember, and tonight it would start spawning.

[clamorbelli]

hey lovelies ! i’m jaz, & i’m here to enter ur lives with my incessant use of the exclamation point & love hearts !!! <3 <3 <3 i love videogames, milkshakes, and i’m currently melting in this uk heat since i’m a simple winter child. pls excuse the parts of my blog that are still messy af, i’m slowly sorting out stats, nav, etc ( all the boring bits ) and trying to make it all look semi-presentable, so whilst i do that there are some key points about my two babies, angelo and noelle, under the cut. i apologise in advance for how long these got! pls don’t hate me ok i’m bad at pArApHrAsInG.

like this if you’d like to plot or feel free to message me either through my ims or on my discord – arcanine#0252 ! 

◟ * ◊ ─  benjamin wadsworth + cismale + he/him » * believe it or not angelo belongs to the mancini family. they are 19 years of age and are known to usually spend their time around magnolia’s coffee shop. the college dropout has been living in victoria for his entire life. the people closest to them describe the heterosexual + capricorn to be +placid and +tenacious as well as -calculated and -faultfinding » ◦ ° jaz, twenty-two, she/her, gmt◝

trigger warnings: death, suicide mention.

meet angelo ! more commonly known as angel by his late mother and those in his super inner circle. youngest of the mancini clan, and now 1/2 of the remaining duo, he’s dropped out of college to keep a close eye on rocco and the family estate in general.

i’ll put more about his past in his biography, since i’d ideally wanna’ iron all the details first, but he was a massive momma’s boy and always has been despite her problems. all you really need to know for plotting is that he’s been in victoria his entire life, except –––

from when he went to college last year !!! wow ! smart boy. angelo actually got accepted into MIT to study biomedical engineering, and for the year or so he was able to attend, he was incredibly passionate. he hated being away from his mom at the time, but he never let it show, as he did with most things.

when she died in late 2018, after only a few months of angelo being enrolled, he was a mess behind closed doors. he found it hard to cope, and even harder to come to terms with the fact he hadn’t been there for her in her final moments, even if it was self-caused. however, not knowing his father’s own mental state, angelo chose to stay in massachusetts, planning to come home for the funeral and that alone.

the news of his father’s suicide came not long after, though angelo’s reaction to that was far less visceral. he chose to come home only for a week, to see how his brother was and to attend funerals and events, mind falling straight into business mode and making sure to give his brother a long list of things he needed to keep an eye on. angelo had faith that rocco would handle things for the next two years whilst he graduated. things fell apart quick.

he continued to attend MIT for as long as he could, but news of rocco’s lifestyle and attitude always slinked its way down the grapevine to angelo, the nineteen year old boy at the university of his dreams. for him, a loyal mancini til’ the grave and a child who’d lost his mother, the choice to drop out of university wasn’t difficult. he left at the end of his first year, at the end of june, and has been home ever since. the staff tried to stop him, his circle of friends tried to stop him, but the choice had been made. he was going back to victoria.

does he resent his brother for what he’s had to do? not at all, he could never resent his best friend, but angelo would be lying if he said victoria was where he wanted to be. he’s now working closely with the current family accountant, being alongside him so he can keep the closest eye possible on the family finances and know what kind of deals and discussions he can afford possible business partners. it’s not surprising most turn their noses up at a nineteen year old trying to make business deals, but most are thrown onto their asses when he speaks.

PERSONALITY –––

angel is... kinda difficult? but also compared to his brother, he’s super easy to deal with. he’s a bit icy, but he doesn’t do it to ‘keep people away’ or anything like that, it’s just his natural demeanour, and he always appreciates people who aren’t bothered by his cool attitude at first and are willing to forge a friendship with him of some kind, though his persona in general naturally rubs people the wrong way.

he’s incredibly calm, and there’s very little that can be said or done to provoke any kind of reaction related to anger out of him.

he doesn’t like failure, but he is of the mindset that it makes you better as a person. however he despises people who let their failures or traumas affect them massively as people, so much so to the point where it affects their success. that’s one thing angelo has inherited from his father, his drive. his greed for succeeding. money isn’t the goal here, power is.

he’s practically a prodigy. his intelligence is off the scale and whilst 50% of that is natural ability, the other 50% is his own hard work and diligence. he’s not afraid to let you know how smart he is, nor will he accept anyone trying to tell him he’s only where he is because of his family. he seriously works his ass off, so much so you’d forget his family’s already wealthy and think he’s gone some kind of debt to pay off. angel’s always working on something, always scribbling away some kind of idea in his notebooks or planning something.

literally never stops pointing out faults in other people, thanks angel.

tends to think entirely with his head and is good at pushing emotion out of the equation 99% of the time. he’s very, very logical, plans pretty much all of his day, every day. spontaneity isn’t a word in his vocabulary and he doesn’t think his life is any worse off without it.

he has a penchant for pastries and good coffee and so you can nearly always find him these days at magnolia’s coffee shop. he enjoys his own company and therefore is usually alone, but won’t turn down the company of a friend so long as they don’t speak. at all.

◟ * ◊ ─  phoebe tonkin + cisfemale + she/her » * believe it or not noelle mercier is working for the bianchi family. they are 28 years of age and are known to usually spend their time around crystal woods. the escort, who has been a part of the alliance for 3 years, has been living in victoria for 4 years. the people closest to them describe the bisexual + pisces to be +tenderhearted and +intuitive as well as -pithless and -elusive » ◦ ° jaz, twenty-two, she/her, gmt◝

trigger warnings: death, sex work, suicidal thoughts, predatory behaviour, murder.

disclaimer: noelle’s soft. as fuck.

she was born in the south of france to two very french parents. she grew up there for most of her young life, living idyllically with little care. she was brought up to be kind and compassionate. her mother ran a sanctuary for local, injured wildlife and her father was a passionate journalistic photographer who travelled the world. she was exposed to culture, love, and nature when she was younger, and it shows to this day.

life was not to be all sunshine and rainbows for noelle. at sixteen, her father got caught up in a warzone, shot in action and killed on the spot. noelle’s mother experienced a complete psychotic breakdown, unable to look after herself, let alone noelle. the young girl watched, helpless, as the woman she had admired for so many years disappeared, taking the final memories of her beloved father with her. noelle was sent to live with her aunt in america, a continent that didn’t favour girls as gentle as her.

she quickly realised her only friend and ally in this new place was her cousin, louisa. her aunt was a horrible, hard woman who seemed to hate both of the girls with a seething passion, and her uncle leered at noelle whenever he could, copping feels and whispering inappropriate nothings into her ear. noelle and louisa protected each other, spent most of their nights out, eventually finding trouble.

noelle met him when she was on the brink of turning eighteen. maybe that’s what he used to justify it in a state where the age of consent was 16. robert misfer was rich. he was the diamond in their city. he paid for everything and anything anyone could ever want. he got whatever he wanted, and he wanted noelle. she was young, she was impressionable, and she fell so madly in love with someone she thought was her prince. they dated for four years when she should’ve been with boys her age. he had a wife and kids. she had her high school diploma. he put her through university. she answered his every beck and call. louisa tried her best to stop her, but what could she say? robert took noelle from the prying eyes of her uncle. in noelle’s eyes, they weren’t the same.

sometime during this whole ordeal robert bought noelle and louisa an apartment, allowing them their independence at the cost of noelle’s dignity.

until one day, robert disappeared. he had moved away with his family the day after noelle’s graduation. she was destroyed. she couldn’t do anything for weeks straight, louisa could do nothing except convince her to keep living – and eventually, she began to recover.

that was when louisa revealed a secret – cam work. noelle was in a bad place, she was  a beautiful young woman who felt unloved and unwanted, so louisa suggested she cam on the side for cash. louisa didn’t realise just how desperate noelle was for love, the love she had replaced with the attention she gained from her fans.

she worked as a cam girl for years, doing it partly for the money, partly for the enjoyment she got from feeling empowered, and partly for the toxic reason of finally being able to get the affection and attention she wanted. she loved being a cam girl, it was her whole life, until word got out in their neighbourhood.

they shunned noelle. treated her as if she should’ve been ashamed of what she’d been doing despite the fact they all did much worse behind closed doors. she withdrew into herself again for a week, stopped streaming completely and closed down her account. it rocked her fanbase but noelle could hardly cope. she wasn’t built to receive criticism like this, especially criticism for something that had brought her so much joy, something she saw nothing wrong with.

it all came to a head one night. noelle had locked herself in her room when her aunt and uncle came to their apartment, demanding to see her and berate her for what she’d done. louisa stood at the front door, defiant, radiant, beautifully strong... but she was no match for their horrendous uncle, her own father, who beat his own daughter with his bare hands until she couldn’t breathe. noelle witnessed it all, had left her room when she heard the screams, held her cousin – no, her sister – in her arms as she died on their living room floor. her uncle had disappeared by the time the police arrived, and once the police themselves learned of noelle’s job? they could barely afford her a drop of respect. louisa’s death went unpunished. the world continued revolving. noelle was lost.

the harassment eventually got so bad that she had no choice but to move, but where was she even supposed to start? it’s not like she had any family anymore, all of her friends had long since abandoned her to avoid the fallout of knowing her, and the last boyfriend she’d had... well, we all know how that went. it wasn’t until she stumbled upon an old newspaper clipping tucked away in her cousins belongings that she knew where to go – victoria.

as morbid as it was, the newspaper clipping described the deaths of fifty of the victoria residents at the bronze, and noelle knew immediately it was where she needed to be. no one would judge her there. it was a place seeped full of history that people daren’t speak of. it was somewhere she could hide, and that’s what noelle did best.

she successfully moved to victoria four years ago, where she finally restarted her cam girl career. eventually, after a year, someone involved with the bianchi family sought her out and offered her the job of a lifetime. not only was noelle protected as an escort, she earned much more money. whilst in her day to day life she was still awkward and shy, her camming allowed her to separate her job from her personal life, letting her focus on her goal of making people happy and making her a very effective escort. 

she loves animals! loves nature! wiccan! this will all be in her stats but like !!!! U NEED TO KNOW !!!!!

PERSONALITY –––

noelle, despite everything, is perhaps the most tenderhearted person you could meet. she’s gentle, trusting, and patient. she treats everyone as if they’re the most precious person in the world and looks at everything with a sense of wonder and amazement. she’s v generous, just loves !!! helping people !!!

wishes she was a princess and is waiting for a prince to sweep her off her feet. i’m not joking. literally loves love and romanticises everything like jesus shut up noelle please. 

she has no backbone. her parents, and then louisa, were her backbone for her entire life, protecting her and coddling her until it was too late for her to develop a spine of her own. she allows people to walk all over her with no consequence, lets them use her until there is nothing of her left, and she’s the one forced to rebuild. but it doesn’t matter, if the other person is happy, that’s all noelle wants.

she’s surprisingly elusive and distant about her past. whilst her warmth radiates into every part of her life and other people’s lives, noelle... doesn’t talk about her past, where she’s from, and if the conversation ever veers that way she’s a pro at steering it differently. no one ever thinks anything of it because of how open she seems to be, but truthfully she’s incredibly private, nobody truly knows much about her of worth at all.

she’s pretty emotional (shock) and cries a fairly decent amount. she doesn’t deal well with being shouted at or scolded, but she does well at hiding her tears in those situations and has learned to separate that from when people are genuinely pissed at her. she cries more when people are in pain, are upset, or if someone’s genuinely hurt her.

that’s it

it’s over

thank god

[starswornoaths]

🌌

Mun talks about muse asks- Accepting!

🌌Favorite alternate version of the muse?

Ohh, we’re getting into the tough ones…

I think I’m fascinated with this AU I have in my head of Myrina never leaving Ishgard, but still settling down with Hanvesh there. They still have their adventures, still adopt Uthengentle, but the way they raise their kids (and the fact that they don’t get separated from them, or in Hanvesh’s case, die) would completely alter a lot of what makes Serella and Uthengentle tick. They’d have the same temperament, but different motivations, and would be more sheltered, their world view completely skewed from what it is in main canon. The thought of that intrigues me, even if I’m not entirely sure how I would flesh it out in the context of xiv’s story/world.

There’s another AU that’s largely the same as main canon but diverges at the Vault- Haurchefant doesn’t die, but is gravely wounded, but the plan outside of getting to Aymeric backfires completely. So lacking any other plan, they smuggle the still heavily injured Aymeric out of Ishgard while Lucia and Estinien promise to keep an eye on Haurchefant (who had not been hit in the same way but was still seriously injured in the attempt to stop the Archbishop.)

Hilda would take to being their informant for how things are going on in Ishgard, and Aymeric would be spirited away to stay in Gridania to recover and plan how to save his home from itself. The Archbishop’s ship would have been injured, grounding him, but allowing him to attempt to control the narrative of how things went down. Most don’t believe it- and largely accept the truth of what was discovered about the real origin of Ishgard and the Dragonsong War, but do not act out of fear of the Heaven’s Ward’s wrath. 

Queue some slow burn caming/adventuring/ranger bullshit between Serella and Aymeric, where he’s forced to take up his bow again and she’s showing him more about her backstory and how she got as good at tracking things as she did. Eventually they actually get together quicker than they do in canon, if only because of how frequently they are in very close proximity of one another. They mostly lurk within Gridania and Dravania, only briefly stealing into Ishgard here and there to obtain information from Hilda and Lucia as they try to rally a resistance from within the city. Eventually, when the Archbishop tries again to get to Azys Lla, they give chase, with Estinien in tow- and that ends the same as it does in canon. 

Sor Khai would still happen as it did, but the ensuing struggle immediately after would be Aymeric’s true return to Ishgard- and the people’s faith in his dedication to the city would be satisfied because he brought with him the Warrior of Light, who ends the conflict.

In the days afterward the nobles are falling over themselves to make Aymeric accept not only his old position as Lord Commander (though he had never really given that up, and had always intended to take that mantle upon his return) but also the position of Lord Speaker. He hesitates, largely because he’s finally found happiness on a personal level- not just with his relationship with Serella, but the close friendships he’s forged with the Scions, and those in the Alliance and various NPCs. He knows it would guarantee an end to his adventuring days- and he’s only just accepted how much he wants to just be an adventurer with the woman he loves. Serella reassures him that no matter what he chooses, she loves him no less, and he would lose no one if he chose to accept the position. “The road will always be there- and so will I,” she says.

So he becomes the Lord Speaker, in addition to the Lord Commander, even knowing something that’s only just awakened within him dies because of it. Because regardless of personal want, he never lost an onze of his dedication to Ishgard and to the Fury.

[comicgeekscomicgeek]

Their Hero Academia: Chapter 15

As always, raw and unedited until it gets added to AO3 and FF.net.  This chapter also owes a great deal to my friend, Allie, who suggested some of the dialog in this chapter, as well as some of the details surrounding Kenta Sato’s mom that I had never planned for originally.

Chapters 0-12 can be found here.

Chapter 13 (unedited) is here

Chapter 14 (unedited) is here

Their Hero Academia – Chapter 15: Kenta Sato and the Pain of Memories and Moving On

Many years ago…

“Kenta,” Takuma asked, “can I ask a question?”

He looked up from his bowl of cereal.  Ever since his Quirk came in, he hasn’t had to worry about getting cavities, so he can eat all the sugary cereal he wants. “Sure,” he said.

“Do you miss your mommy?”

Kenta looked down again.  “All the time.  But Daddy says she’s always watching me.”

“Oh,” Takuma said.  His grin became what, in later years, Kenta would call his “Good Idea” face. “Do you think you could ask her not to watch for a little while?  I don’t think she’s going to like my idea…”

“…I’ll ask her to watch Daddy for a little while.”

***

In spite of a somewhat eventful Monday through Thursday, Friday had passed without incident, and Kenta had left the school grounds early on Saturday morning to head to the apartment he shared with his dad.  It wasn’t particularly far, as Dad has moved the two of them to it to be fairly close to U.A. when he had accepted the job running the cafeteria.  

Kenta turned the key and stepped inside.  “Dad? I’m home!”

No voice answered him, but he knew that sometimes, his dad got so focused working in the kitchen that he didn’t hear anything else.  Kenta headed there, but found no sign of his dad.  There was, however, a note on the counter.

Kenta,

Went out to pick up a few extra ingredients for tonight’s dinner and dessert. Left you some breakfast on the counter. Be back soon!

Love,

Dad

Oh, well, that was good. But speaking of food, his rumbling stomach reminded him that he hadn’t eaten breakfast before he’d left the dorms. On the counter was a bowl of nuts and bolts.  It brought a grin to Kenta’s face.  Dad may have occasionally groused about the eating habits he’d developed because of his Quirk (“A house full of food and the kid’s eating rocks!”), but he was indulgent enough to keep the kinds of things Kenta liked to eat on hand.  He popped a few nuts into his mouth and chewed them up.

Maybe his wasn’t the flashiest or most impressive of Quirks, but he’d done good enough with it to get into the Heroics Course.  Besides, it meant that a snack was always in arms’ reach.

He noticed that his dad’s cell phone was also sitting on the counter.  He must have forgotten it when he left.  It looked like a number of texts had come in since he’d left.

1)     Koda: Please call me if you need me today, Sato.

2)     Kirishima: Katsuki and I are thinking of you, bro!

3)     Ojiro: Hope you’re doing all right.  Toru and I are keeping you in our thoughts.

4)     Sero: Hey, man.  I’m sorry about Mina.  She means well, but she can be kind of insensitive sometimes.  Let us know if you need anything!

5)     Midoria: I know you’re spending the day with Kenta, but just let us know if you want to get together sometime after that!

6)     Iida: Please accept my deepest sympathies and know Mei and I are keeping you in our thoughts.

7)     Habuko: I’ll see you there today.  Be well.

8)     Pink Trouble: Sato, I’m not sorry about what I said. But I am sorry about the timing of it. Call me.  Please.

Kenta felt a little guilty reading his dad’s texts, but considering they were right there to be seen, it wasn’t much.  But now we was curious.  What exactly had Aunt Mina said?  It looked like she and his dad were fighting?  But what about?  The other texts, at least, weren’t unexpected.  There were probably more that had come in earlier in the day.   Kenta had been lucky enough to get out of the dorms without running into anyone other than Takuma (who’d hugged him), Midoriya (who’d expressed sympathy) and Kirishima-Bakugo (who’d given him a polite nod that was the emotional equivalent of a long conversation for her).   Not that he was deliberately trying to avoid his friends and classmates, just… today was rough.

The anniversary of the day his mom had died always was.  It had been ten years now.   And it still didn’t seem any easier.

***

Rikido Sato had first met Chizu Ito via a conspiracy.  She had been a friend of Habuko Mongoose at Isamu Academy, and Mongoose had been the good friend of his father’s friend Tsuyu Asui.  So when several of the girls of Isamu Academy had gotten together for a party with the girls of U.A., Aunt Tsu had asked his dad to provide the desserts. He’d meant to just drop the desserts off and go, but Aunt Tsu and Mongoose had both insisted he stay and meet some of the girls.  They’d been incredibly insistent that he meet Chizu.  

The two had hit it off and made plans for a date.  One date turned into many, and many turned into marriage.  Years later, Aunt Tsu would reveal she and Mongoose had conspired to get the two to meet, believing that they would hit it off.  They had been very happy.

His mom had been a tall woman, taller even than his dad.  Her Quirk had been a strong one, letting her absorb inorganic matter and using that to increase her mass and strength.  But his memories of her were as a happy woman, with a glowing smile. He remembered her hands were soft, soothing as she held him after a nightmare, her touch gentle when she patched up his “ouchies.”   He remembered his parents laughing in the kitchen, or snuggling on the couch, sneaking kisses when they thought he wasn’t looking.

After he’d been born, his parents had decided that while his mom would resume active Hero work, his dad would mostly step back from that.  Lunch Rush was retiring, U.A. was looking for a new head chef to run the cafeteria, and both of them were a little bit worried about what might happen if both of them were active Heroes.  While that didn’t seem to matter to the majority of their friends, no one dismissed their worries or thought less of him for taking a step back.  He still went out on occasion when needed, or stepped in where he was available to act, but he devoted himself more to community outreach and the students of U.A.  So Upsize had risen back in the rankings, eventually becoming the Number Twenty Hero, and Sugarman had happily dropped to the lower tiers.

They’d have a good life. They’d been a happy family.

He had been five when she’d died.

No, that wasn’t exactly right.

He had been seven when she’d been killed.

It had been bad times. A new League of Villains had tried to get off the ground, and the Pro-Hero community had been working nonstop to put them out of commission before anything serious could happen.  They hadn’t been the nihilistic League of old, just a bunch of Villains who had found they were stronger together than apart, and willing to settle for smaller piece of a more guaranteed pie.  But they had been a serious threat all the same. Their Quirks were powerful and many Pro-Heroes had been seriously injured fighting them.

It had come down to a big battle between the League and several Pro-Heroes, including Red Riot, Real Steel, and Chargebolt.  Including Upsize.

To say the battle between the two groups had been brutal was an understatement.  The villain known as Strongarm had nearly beaten Red Riot to death. Kirishima-Bakugo’s father was lucky to have survived his injuries, let alone have recovered from them enough to return to active Hero work.  Uncle Denki still carried a few scars from that fight.

And his mom…  His mom had fought a Villain called Hexsplode, who a Quirk which let her shoot beams from her eyes that made whatever it hit explode.  In a terrible set of circumstances, she’d managed to use that power on a piece of rubble, just as his mom had absorbed it.  It had exploded within her, badly injuring her.  She had fought on, subduing the Villain before she could hurt anyone else in that fight.   But her injuries had been too severe and she’d died before she could receive medical attention.  They’d never even gotten the chance to say good-bye.

***

It was called Valhalla Cemetery and everyone buried in it was a Pro-Hero.  Many had fallen in the line of duty, others of disease or natural causes.  But all of them had used their Quirks in the cause of justice.  Grand Torini was buried here, so was Native, and so were many others.

And so was his mom.

Kenta and his dad walked silently through the rows of headstones and memorials, occasionally pausing to pay respect to another Pro-Hero. There were so many graves and his mom was quite far back.  

It wasn’t the fanciest headstone in the cemetery, but like everything there, it was well cared for. There were a few small tokens left on or around it, from people his mom had saved during her all too brief stint as a Pro-Hero.  There was already someone standing in front of the headstone and Kenta quickly realized it was Aunt Habuko, instantly recognizable from her shock of red hair and snake-like head.  According to his parents, he’d found her absolutely terrifying as a baby, but the only memories he had of her were happy ones.  She was surprisingly funny when she wanted to be, and caring in spite of her harsh appearance.

Her tongue flicked out and she turned her head to watch the two of them.  “Hello, Rikido, Kenta.  I didn’t expect to beat you here.”

“My fault,” his dad said. “I had to go out and pick up a few things and was running behind.”

She nodded, accepting the explanation without criticism.

They stood and looked at the grave.

Chizu Sato

-Upsize-

5/19/XXXX – 4/8/XXXX

Beloved wife and mother, Hero

His dad laid a hand on the headstone and lowered his head.  Kenta could see the tears in his eyes falling unashamedly.  “I miss you, babe,” he said.  “Every day.  Thank you, for everything.   Never did think a girl could fall for a big lug like me.  You made every day amazing.

“You’d be so proud of Kenta. He got into U.A., just like me. He’s gonna make us both proud, I just know it.  Though if you’re watching out for him, maybe tell him not to listen to Takuma so much, okay?”

In spite of himself, Kenta felt the smallest smile pull at his lips.  But he found tears were falling from his own eyes too.   He’d been so young when she’d died.  Their home was filled with pictures of him and his mom and of all three of them.  There were lots of videos they had shot over the years.  And even one memorable episode of Cooking with Pro Heroes that had featured his mom and dad competing against other Pro Hero couples.  

But sometimes, he found it harder and harder to remember her voice.  His dad had gone an amazing job raising him, dealing with all the challenges that had arisen over the years.  But all his friends still had their mothers, and he remembered how much it had hurt sometimes, to see them with their moms, knowing he didn’t have one anymore.  He remembered…

***

“Daddy?” he’d asked, when his father had come to pick him up. He’d been staying with Uncle Koji and Aunt Ibara, playing with Akaya.  It was earlier than expected, his dad should have still been at U.A. for the day. His dad’s eyes were red and puffy, like he’d been crying.

“Daddy, are you okay?” he’d asked.  And where was his mom?  Usually, they picked him up together.

His dad had bent down next to him, pulling him into a tight hug against his broad chest.

“Kenta…” he’d said, trailing off.  “Kenta…”

His dad had taken a deep breath, and tried again.  “Kenta…  I’m…  I’m so sorry.  Your mommy’s not coming home.”

That hadn’t made much sense to him.  “Is she working late?  Does she gotta stop the bad guys?”

His father’s face had fallen, tears welling up in his eyes.  “Kenta…  Your mommy’s not coming home ever again.  I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…”

He hadn’t understood then, but he’d known how brave his dad was. To have seen him cry like that could only mean something was very wrong.   He’d understand all too soon.

The days that followed had been full of people in their home. Uncle Koji, Aunt Mina and Uncle Sero, Aunt Habuko, former teachers from U.A. and Isamu Academy, family, and friends. They had all said how sorry they were. His friends had all said how sorry they were.  But they had all been there with their moms and his was gone and never coming back. Really, the only one who had understood was Katsumi Kirishima-Bakugo, whose father still lay in a hospital bed, fighting for every breath and clinging to life.   They had drifted apart over the years, but in that moment, the two of them had been there for each other.

Oh, the adults had all said, what a hero she had been.  The TV had all talked about what a hero she had been, how they were proud of the Hero who had laid down her life for them.

But nothing changed the fact that he was five years old and he was never going to see his mom again.

***

Kenta put his own hand on the grave.

“Mom…  I know you’re watching over me.  Thank you.   Don’t know how I’d have done any of this without you.   I hope I can make you proud.  I just…

“I wish I’d gotten to know you more.  I wish we’d had more time.  I wanted you to see who I’ve become.  I really hope you’re still watching out for me.  I’m gonna need all the help I can get if I’m gonna be a hero like you.

“But, ah, I am getting to be pretty famous.  On the internet, anyway.  Takuka says we can make it pretty big…”

He wiped the tears from his eyes.  “I just… I just wish…  I wish you’d been here.  There’s so much I wish we’d gotten to do together, so much I wish I’d gotten to show you.

“I…  I miss you.  So much.  And I wish…

“I wish I could remember you better.  And I’m worried I’m starting to forget you.  Not… forget you, forget you.  You’re my mom.  I’ll always remember you.  But I don’t know if I can remember your voice.  Sometimes, in my memories, in my dreams, I can’t see your face…  I don’t want to forget…”

He felt a strong arm wrap itself around him, his father pulling him close.  No more words were needed as they stood there, letting their thoughts wander.  Their loss still pulled at them.  It always would.  But they were strong for each other.  And they always would be.  That was what family meant.

***

As they ate their dinner (which he had helped prepare), Kenta did have to admit, there was something to be said for eating actual food instead of whatever happened to be within arms’ reach.  Still… there was something nagging at the back of his mind.

“Dad,” he began, “why aren’t you talking to Aunt Mina?”

His dad frowned, swallowing the bite of food in his mouth.  “What’re you talking about, Kenta?”

“You left your phone this morning,” Kenta said.  “I saw the texts.  I saw Uncle Hanta apologizing for her too.  What’s going on?”

His dad looked distinctly uncomfortable.  “It’s nothing.  Just an argument between adults.”

Kenta definitely didn’t believe that.  His dad was too soft-hearted to every fight with anyone for long.  And Takuma’s mom got along with pretty much everyone, whether they wanted to or not.

“Dad, I’m not a kid. I’m fifteen.  If something’s going on, you can tell me.”

His dad frowned again. “…your Aunt Mina thinks I should start dating.  She’s been trying to fix me up for months.”

Kenta was glad he wasn’t drinking, because he probably would have done a spit take.  “Oh.”

“You don’t have to worry,” his dad said quickly.  “I’ve been telling her no.  No one’s ever going to replace Chizu.”

Kenta looked down at his plate.  In all honesty, this was a conversation he’d thought about having with his dad before. But he’d never been sure how to bring it up.  He knew his dad was happy, but also that he had to be lonely.  “I think you should let her.”

“…What?”

Kenta took a breath, to steady his nerves and thoughts.  “I know you love Mom.  And I know you miss her.  I do too. And I know you’ve been living your life for me.  And that’s great, it really is.  I couldn’t have asked for a better dad than you.

“But I’m part way out of the house now, on my way to becoming a Pro-Hero.  And you deserve a chance to have a life too.  If you want to start dating, if you find someone who makes you happy, I’m not going to think you’re replacing Mom.  You get to be happy too, Dad.”

“Kenta, I…   I can’t.  It’s been too long.  Your mom…”

He shook his head.  “I don’t remember much, but from everything you ever told me…  Mom would want you to be happy, Dad.  I want you to be happy.  And it sounds like that’s all Aunt Mina wants.”

His dad wiped away a tear. “When did you get so smart?  I’m lucky to have you.”

“I’m pretty lucky too, Dad.”

A long moment passed, in peaceful silence.  Finally, Kenta spoke again.  “You know, you didn’t seem to think I was so smart on Thursday.  What were your exact words?  “Wasting your Quirk on nonsense.’”

“I stand by those words,” he said.  “But I’m also not going to stand in the way of your dreams.  Just… find somewhere to do it other than my cafeteria, okay?”

Kenta laughed at that. “Yeah, okay, I’ll tell Takuma we need to find another place for our show.”

“I swear, that boy has gotten you in so much trouble…”

“Daaaad…”

And somehow, as it did, life went on.

[pushspacetocontinue]

Russell Tolbert TV Tropes

Below the read more (because it is a long long list) are a list of TV Tropes (because I love them) that apply to Russell. There is a list for his main verse, Gemsona/SU Verse, his TF2 Verse, and his Superhero verse (the rest haven’t had much of a chance to be used) and I plan to add more of them as I find them, along with the ones for AUs. 

So if you decided to read them, click on and enjoy. Trigger warning for mentions of abusive parents, alcohol addiction and a suicide attempt below.

Normal Verse TV Tropes

Abusive Parents: His Mother, Cassandra. He and his brothers were all victims of her abusive behaviour. While her favourite thing to do was verbally and emotionally hurt then via humiliation, degradation, and manipulation, she wasn’t afraid to get physical with them either. She was also neglectful and dismissive, leaving her oldest sons to look after the others while she did whatever she wanted. Thankfully, his Father, Jean-Luc, is none of these things.

Adorkable: Loyal? Check. Shy? Check. Kind? Check. An absolute nerd when it comes to videogames, space, and drumming? Check. 

Affluent Ascetic: Lives in a modest but nice apartment with basic furniture and a few luxuries despite having the money for more. His reason being is that he’s perfectly happy with what he has already. 

Animal Motifs: Moths and Butterflies. 

Apologises a Lot: Part of him being an Extreme Doormat. 

The Baby of the Bunch: He has seven brothers, and they’re all older. 

Bad Dreams: He has them often, usually after something particularly distressing or painful. 

Befriending the Enemy: Usually his first option. If that doesn’t work and the enemy isn’t backing down, then the switch-blade comes out. 

Beware the Nice Ones: Will not hesitate to jump in and protect someone he cares about, even if it means kicking ass. 

Bookworm: Books and games were his biggest forms of escapism when he was a child. He’s carried his love for both into his adulthood. 

Bungled Suicide: Also combined with Interrupted Suicide. He tried to die but was too drunk to make himself bleed out quickly, which gave Gertrude enough time to find him and call an ambulance to save him.

- This led to a Happily Failed Suicide, where he had managed to start turning his life around since the attempt and making positive changes. He’s not where he wants to be yet, but he’s doing better than he was.

Character Tics: He laughs awkwardly when he’s nervous or embarrassed about something. 

Chronic Hero Syndrome: He admits that he just cannot leave someone in need behind.

Cool Uncle: Viewed as such by his eldest niece, Gracie. 

Combat Pragmatist: He’s not strong, but tries to make up for this by using speed and agility, fighting dirty, and thinking quickly. He’ll go for the eyes, crotch and neck if he has to. 

Cowardly Lion: He’s shy, socially awkward, insecure, and tries to avoid conflict whenever possible, but when it comes to protecting his friends or defending himself, then he’ll jump straight in. 

Disappeared Dad: For most of his childhood and teen years, although not his father’s fault. Thankfully, they’ve since reunited. 

Extreme Doormat: Something that he needs to change.

Friends Are Chosen, Family Aren’t: While reconnecting with his living brothers again, he still chose new people as his family after his mother disowned and vowed to kill him if she saw him again, and cares for him like they’re his siblings too. 

Guilty Pleasure: Nintendo games (particularly Pokemon and Yokai Watch). While his colleagues at the cafe like them too, he still feels a little bit embarrassed about it. 

Hair of Gold, Heart of Gold: A man who tries to be good and decent to those around him. His sandy/straw-coloured locks fit the bill. 

I Am Not my Mother: Partially why he does his best to be the good man that he is; he refuses to continue any pain or suffering his Mother caused him and his brothers, especially now that she’s gone.

The Insomniac: Has trouble falling asleep and then staying asleep if he does. 

Le Parkour: One of his main hobbies and skills, having kept up the practice for years. 

Massive Numbered Siblings: Lived with his seven older brothers and mother in the same house until they started moving out. 

Musician: A drummer for a (mostly) Electro Swing band known as Midnight Swarm. 

Must Have Caffeine: He honestly has no idea what he would do without coffee or other such caffeinated substances. 

Near-Death Experience: Has experienced a few of these in his life time. The most serious left him unconscious in hospital for two days, and needing time to recover after he woke up. 

Never Speak Ill of the Dead: A mild example. When people find out his mother died, he tries to downplay it simply by telling them ‘she wasn’t a good woman’ and leaving it at that.

Platonic Life Partners: With his dear friend, Pari Vass. 

Plays Games at Work: Plays on his 3DS or Switch when it’s slow at the cafe. 

Pungeon Master: He admits that he really likes puns a little bit too much for his good. 

Rage Breaking Point: How his anger presents itself. He holds it back and if it doesn’t get vented out, one more straw will eventually break the metaphorical camel’s back. There are warning signs though, such as increased irritability. He inherited this from his mother. 

Recovered Addict: Used to drink alcohol to excess. He has since stopped and has been clean just over a year and a half.

Right Hand Cat: A non-villainous example in Misty, who he inherited from his previous landlady, Gertrude. 

Secretly Wealthy: Thanks to a very large inheritance he received from his late landlady, Gertrude. He doesn’t like to flaunt it for fear of attracting the wrong kind of attention. That doesn’t stop from making regular anonymous donations to crowdfunding sites, charity organisations and from paying for other people whenever he can. 

Self-Deprecation: Guilty of doing this a lot. 

Sir Swears-a-Lot: Having a bunch of sailor-mouthed older brothers and a foul-mouthed mother has had this effect on him. He swears even in his casual speech, although he does rein it in when around  kids or the elderly. 

Speech Impediment: He has a noticeable stammer. He has got it somewhat under control thanks to spending a lot of time practising his talking, but it still comes out on occasion. 

Stage Names: When he’s drumming for the band, he’s Luna Moth. 

Straight Gay: Is attracted to other men, but has been mistaken for straight or asexual on several occasions. 

Weak but Skilled: Is fast, agile and knows how to move. But he can easily be taken down if he makes one wrong step. 

Unfazed Everyman: Has met multiple supernatural beings, monsters, or otherwise odd people, but has already learnt to accept their presence.

Why did it Have to be Snakes?: He’s absolutely terrified of the ocean. 

TF2 Verse TV Tropes

Breaking the Fourth Wall: Has done this a few times now. It seems to be a Scout thing.

Double Jump: A Scout standard. 

Death is a slap on a Wrist: He respawns when he dies, making any kind of death this. That said, he tries to avoid it whenever possible. 

Eaten Alive: Has been a victim of this twice now. He respawned both times, but he’s been left with a deep aversion to that kind of death. 

Fish out of Temporal Water: A very mild example. He was killed and remained dead and stuck in respawn for two years. When he came out, it felt like no time had passed, leaving him very surprised to see that he really had been gone for an extended period. However, he quickly became used to the idea and accepted it. If anything, he was glad for having more movies, books, and music to catch up on. 

Fragile Speedster: Once again, a Scout standard.

Friendly Enemy: Is this to REDs when off the clock (see Punch-Clock villain below.)   

Never Hurt an Innocent: He won’t attack civilians unless absolutely necessary, and even then, he does his best not to use lethal force.

Nothing Personal: How he views his job. 

Older than they Look: While this happens in his normal verse, it happens a lot more in the TF2 Verse. He’s often mistaken for a newbie, or someone way too young to be fighting.

Only in it for Money: Why he chose to work a job killing people in an endless war in the first place. That, and getting away from his mother.

Punch-Clock Villain: Is this to the REDs. Once battles are done, he treats them like any other person; with decency and respect. 

Railroad Tracks of Doom: How he was killed and spent two years in respawn.

Stereotype Flip: Scouts are often viewed as being loud mouthed, arrogant, and bratty. He is none of those things, not even in battle. This has surprised many a merc. 

Why did it have to be Snakes: Due to a previous medic’s experiments, he has been left terrified of snakes and spiders. He’s also very afraid of being eaten, having been swallowed alive before and finding it less than pleasant.

Super Hero/ Luna Moth Tropes: 

Lunacy: The night sky, particular the moon and the stars, bring out his full abilities. While he can still fight and use his abilities during the day, his performance suffers greatly. 

Mutant: How he feels it’s the best way to describe him, due to his zombie-like traits, he way he makes no noise (no rustling of clothing or a voice), and millions of stars can be seen beyond his pupils. That said, he uses his powers for good. 

Revenant Zombie: He spent a year ‘pupating’ when his mutation occurred. He was considered dead when it happened and even now, he doesn’t need to breath, eat, or sleep. He doesn’t even have a heartbeat or bleed. However, he does feel pain, he can become injured, and become fatigued. He theorises that whatever developed in his corpse happens to possess his memories and has yet to develop any consciousness if it even has one.

Rise From your Grave: The first thing he did after he first revived as the mutant he is now was claw out of the hole he was buried in. 

The Speechless: Due to his inability to make any noise, this also affects his ability to talk. He communicates via sign language, text, typing, and a special device that reads his brain waves in his base.

Star Power: In addition to his enhanced speed, agility, and stamina, the easiest way to describe his powers is ‘summoning pieces of the night sky from within and shaping them into whatever he chooses’. 

The Stoic: Comes across as this due to his emotions being severely numbed since his resurrection into Luna Moth. 

Uncanny Valley: Has invoked in a few people if they hang around him for too long without knowing what he really is. So he tries not to get too close to them.

Gemsona/ SU Verse Tropes: 

Alas, poor Villain: Feels this for Pink Diamond. He wishes she hadn’t been shattered and that things hadn’t gone as far as they had. 

Amazing Technicolour Population: A standard among gems like him. His especially so due to being a Bornite. 

Because You Were Nice to Me: Pretty much the main reason he defected to Rose Quart’s side. After the other gems believing he was flawed and treating him as such, he exchanged Rose Quart’s acceptance for his services. 

Desperately Looking for a Purpose in Life: He was originally dismissed by the Crystal Gems, who told him they would call him if his services were needed by them again. He still feels lost even now, despite trying to fill his life with different drives. 

Dual Tonfas: Has a pair of bladed ones that his Energy Bow (see below) turns into when he ends up in a situation that necessitates close combat. 

Energy Bow: The weapon of choice he summons from his gem, the arrows are made of Hard Light and infinite. However, he needs to take time to concentrate on ‘reloading’. It splits into Dual Tonfas (see above) for close combat situations. 

Inside Job: Before the shattering, some of his jobs were to pretend he was still on the side of Homeworld and give false messages. 

Martial Pacifist: Since the shattering of Pink Diamond, he refuses to raise his weapons unless absolutely necessary. However, despite all the years he’s been dodging combat, he still has some prowess and will fight if he has to. 

Really 700 Years Old: While he vaguely looks like a young human male, he’s just over 6000 years old. And it shows.

Sure, Let’s Go With That: Early humans who happened to meet him often assumed he was a fairy or other magical creature due to magic being widely believed in. He just went along with it. The same thing happened when people assumed he had a strange skin condition, which is now the excuse he often gives. 

Super Speed: Was designed to be fast and agile, so that he could deliver items and messages as fast and efficiently as possible. 

Trade Mark Favourite Food: Even though he doesn’t need to eat, he does enjoy coffee and noodles, although not at the same time. 

Video Game Dashing: Has the ability to ‘dash’ in a burst of speed in the air or on the ground. This ability even works on the surface of water.

Wall Crawl: Has the ability to do this, most likely to get past as many obstacles as possible while on messenger missions. 

We Are as Mayflies: Makes this observation a lot, about how humans and other organic Earth species live such short lives. He finds it endearing that they still make the best of the time they have.

[j-exclamationmark-l]

Koiryu Junji scenario

I finished the Junji scenario of Kiryu’s dating sim a while ago. I don't remember it as well as I apparently remembered the guitarists' scenarios, also it bugged me pretty bad so I wasn't terribly invested in it.

The story begins the same as the others', with the protagonist finding herself suddenly in 1800s Japan at the mercy of five dragon gods. Mahiro freaks out to find a human woman at his shrine and threatens to kill her when Junji steps in and stops him. Mahiro relents and lets her stay at the shrine. That night, Junji confronts the protagonist and tells her she needs to show with her actions, not just her words, that she’s willing to help them, which apparently means sitting still and allowing Junji to pretend he’s going to kiss her before he pulls back and laughs. “looool jk u shoulda seen ur face u really thought i was gonna kiss u loooooooooooooool!”

The next day, it’s agreed that the protagonist will go to the establishment Yoidzuki and do work as an oiran to try and gather information for Kiryu on demons, as they cannot return to the Ryuuguu without eradicating all demons from earth. The protagonist spends the night drinking with Tomoya, a high ranking official in the Meiji military. In addition to having something of a man-crush on Junji, he tells the protagonist of a demon called the Bakeneko, or Cat Demon. The protagonist takes this information back to Kiryu.

The six set out for the Bakeneko’s shrine, using the protagonist as bait to lure out the cat demon. Junji saves the day, but gets injured in the process. They take him back to the shrine, where he develops a fever from the poison in the cat’s claws and the protagonist does her best to nurse him back to health and cook for him, which makes him very happy as “no one has cooked for me before.” The protagonist begins to realize she’s falling in love with him.

Also, at some point, the Bakeneko returns in a harmless form, looking to help Kiryu, and Mahiro decides he likes it better than his comrades. Junji names it Takemaru.

At Yoidzuki, a rumor begins that ghosts are haunting the place. Protagonist tells Kiryu, and they decide that every day, one member of Kiryu will go and request her while simultaneously looking for clues about how to draw out the ghost of the Botan Doro, but Junji is scheduled to be last, as he is still recovering from his wounds. The first day brings Mr. Kujou, who does not look for clues, but proceeds to get very, very drunk until Hiyori is called to carry him back home. Some of the oiran allude to the fact they know Hiyori is a man, which puzzles the protagonist as clearly Hiyori is female. Mitsuki comes the second day, refusing to drink. He says he noticed the protagonist and Junji have become close, and asks if Junji told her he already has a fiancee. This breaks the protagonist’s heart and he devotes the rest of the night to comforting her instead of looking for demons. The third day, Mahiro comes, immediately finds the seal protecting the place from the Botan Doro, and stabs the ghost to death.

The latest demon issue resolved, the protagonist goes to work the next day and is requested, much to her surprise. She walks into the room to find none other than Junji, who felt left out that he never got to drink with her. She brings up the fact that he has a fiancee and he promises it doesn’t mean anything. He kisses her and she runs away.

After a while, Junji decides he’d like the protagonist to accompany him to the dojo he owns to learn how to fight; however, for unclear reasons, he decides she’d better disguise herself as a boy named Ryuu. Junji spends all day teasing “Ryuu” during their practice fights and making the girls at the dojo accuse the two of being gay together.

Suddenly, Hayato barges into the dojo, demanding to fight Junji. “If I win, you must give the dojo to me!” he proclaims, and for... reasons I can’t understand, Junji agrees. In any case, Junji wins, and Hayato throws himself at Junji’s feet, begging Junji to take him on as an apprentice, and again, Junji agrees for some reason.

The days are busy for the protagonist, training during the day at the dojo and working as an oiran at night. Tomoya eventually joins the dojo and the protagonist tells him that she’s a pair of identical twins. Tomoya confesses to “Ryuu” that he is in love with Ryuu’s “twin.” Meanwhile Codomo Dragon joins the dojo as well and constantly pick on “Ryuu.”

At Yoidzuki, the protagonist picks up on a new rumor that though it is spring, corpses have been found on the edge of town frozen to death. Mitsuki and Mahiro begin searching for the cause. One day at the dojo, Junji and the protagonist are called away immediately by Kiryu to come help fight the demon they’ve found. They travel to the edge of the village and find a snowstorm. It’s voted that Takemasa should be the one to go check it out, but Junji and the protagonist volunteer to accompany him. In the snow, they discover a fallen woman whose face is obscured by long, black hair. She immediately sees through everyone’s disguises and accuses them of being liars. Junji realizes this is the Yuki Joro and begins trying to fight her, telling the protagonist not to meet her gaze or she’ll be frozen to death. The rest of Kiryu joins the fight and defeat the snow woman, but Junji, Takemasa and the protagonist appear to be suffering from hypothermia. They decide to return to the dojo.

At the dojo, the Meiji government has stepped in and announces it is searching for the Dragonball. Kiryu does its best to pretend they have no idea what that is while trying to take care of the three frozen members. Junji cuddles up with the protagonist beneath a blanket. After the Meiji military leaves, Hayato tells Kiryu he followed them and saw the battle with the Yuki Joro and knows who and what they are and that he knows they have the Dragonball.

Junji and the protagonist spend more and more time with each other until Junji promises to forget his fiancee in favor of the protagonist and they agree to be a couple in secret.

One night, while Junji walks the protagonist through town, a cart nearly topples over on top of the protagonist and almost kills her... but doesn’t, sadly. A mysterious figure seems disappointed.

The next day, the two are walking together again when they notice a white-haired woman fleeing. She runs into Junji, and he identifies her with alarm as his fiancee, Otohime. He takes her back to the shrine, but Kiryu immediately tries to reject her. Mahiro suddenly stops complaining about the protagonist, raving that she’s been super helpful to them and their mission. Mitsuki flat-out tells Otohime to go screw herself and Hiyori and Takemasa sulk around, whispering bad things about her, but Junji seems enchanted by his fiancee, spending every moment with her. Hiyori warns the protagonist that there’s nothing worse than a jealous female god. In the halls at night, Otohime confronts the protagonist, stating ONCE AGAIN that she’s Junji’s fiancee and that the protagonist should back off.

At the dojo, the Codomo Unit agrees that they prefer the protagonist to Otohime and wish the latter would go back to wherever she came from. I don’t really understand why, though. Why do we constantly have to compare the two female characters? Why do we have to pit them against each other? I’ve always had groups of friends that were half male and half female and I have literally never noticed conversations like this occurring organically. Besides, no one even knows the protagonist is a girl, why would... uuuUUUGGHHHH. Why do they two girls have to hate each other? In my opinion, Junji’s the one who’s in the wrong in this situation for lying and being indirect and leading both women on. I feel bad for Otohime. He promised to marry her; who am I to waltz in and take that away from her?

Hayato challenges the protagonist to a duel to get her mind off Otohime, but the protagonist is so distracted that Hayato falls over on top of her and discovers with a strategically-placed hand that she’s actually a girl. The protagonist makes him promise to keep it secret.

Junji tells everyone later that the Dragonball is missing; as it turns out, not only is the Dragonball missing, but so are the special items that belong to the White Tiger (Codomo Dragon) and Black Tortoise (Royz).

Just then a monster is seen, calling all three groups to come and fight it. Otohime reveals that she summoned it with the three artifacts, knowing that once Kiryu was done fighting this last demon, they would have to return to the Ryuuguu and she and Junji could finally be married. Junji is appalled at her, having realized why she was running when they first met (she stole Royz’s artifact). He then demands to know how she managed to come to earth, and she tells him that she sold her soul to be reunited with him once she saw him making out with the protagonist. The protagonist uses the Dragonball to fight off the last demon, but Otohime is gravely injured and without a soul, she will not move on to the next life. The protagonist fights with all her might to keep Otohime from dying and is able to save her and kill the last demon, but by doing so, the protagonist is sent back to 2017.

The protagonist goes about life again as before at her company. Eventually the events she underwent begin to fade like a dream - though she felt she was gone for a year, only a week or so went by in present day, and no one really noticed her absence. She misses Junji terribly and visits a cherry blossom tree like one he was fond of to mourn her loss of him... only to have him approach her, having... magically... found a way to present day to take her back?

In the end, Otohime lives and decides to be fwiends with the protagonist, who will now marry Junji, and everyone lives... happily ever after?

[whydoyouthinkileft]

Because I embraced my canon divergence, and also because I always end up writing Jemma in the same - different from the show - way, I want to make a post to let people know what to expect when they write with my Jemma.

You do not have to read everything (long post) but will notice differences that originated in previous seasons - focus on the season you want. Please, like the post after you read the part you are interested in. (not required to rp with me, just if you want) AU backstories or threads can change some of these.

under read more because dash is acting weird 

Jemma in general:

Compassionate towards people she likes, cold and/or rude towards those she doesn’t like. Hypocrite as hell. Vindictive. Likes jokes, including dark ones about herself. Competitive. Bossy. Doesn’t know how to interact with people well. High self-esteem at work. Low self-esteem in private. Bad health. Reckless. Nerd. Unable to not sass people when she thinks they ask for it. Enjoys bickering. Cuddly with people she likes. Wants a domestic life and to work as a biochem again. Family feels towards Coulson, May and Daisy (Fitz too, when not romantically interested). Will deny her daughter-feelings. Can’t lie, can act. Extreme resistance to physical and emotional pain and ability to power-through for long stretches of time when necessary to survive, though she will break later. Loves tidying up her workplace/home to relax and post-its. Secret-cook. Will laugh hysterically at cute animal videos. Lots and lots of experience with men but only in the physical sense, emotionally has no clue of what she’s doing. Sentimental. Keeps photos of everything. Wants a TARDIS. When she said she wanted to see the world she meant Earth.

Season 2

Jemma is far more traumatized than shown in canon, but hides it just as much. She's suffering of PTSD, she's punishing herself for everything that she has done wrong (real mistakes like lying about going undercover or imaginary ones), ready to die to protect her friends, not only their lives but their good hearts, and therefore also ready to kill and make calls she doesn’t want them to have to face. She also doesn’t care about her own life, both due to the pain and to the fact that she’s the least important one in the team.  While offended by the fact that Fitz wanted to protect Daisy from her because completely unnecessary, she also took it as a confirm that she's 'less good' than the others. She was obviously never against inhumans, merely had no idea of their existence and believed Daisy had been infected same way she was in season 1 (and same way that ended up killing Trip). She also had more trouble than ever in taking care of herself in her everyday life, overworking, forgetting meals when she had a task, ignoring when she got sick and not sleeping enough but hiding it with makeup and smiles. It's around the time Fitz is in a coma that she stops talking to her mother, and for the rest of the year she talks less and less to her father.

She exercises/trains more, because she can't stand other people getting hurt because of her, and is obsessed with Ward at first, and taking revenge on him. Whether in love with Fitz or not there isn’t much difference, she’ll only realize her feelings, if they are there, around the end of the season unless it’s plotted differently.

Season 3

After Maveth and Will she feels uneasy whenever she has to be 'Hope' for someone for too long, unless it does work on cheering the other person up and they aren't acting as Doom because she’s not strong enough to spend five more months being the only one believing in something; she's also torn between the care she felt for him and the anger over his attitude, which makes her feel also guilty because she considers him the reason she survived. She will keep nightmares about the planet, never let go of the shiv, she's afraid of the noise of wind/storms outside. Physically, beside the symptoms of PTS that are just getting worse and involve body as well as emotions, she's also going to take far longer to recover from the food/water/sun deprivation and the constant stress and untreated injures. She's trying to take care of herself better especially in verses where she’s dating and has therefore someone close to her who pushes her to be careful, but it's still not optimal. 

The planet helped her make peace with past issues, and she has also started ‘accepting’ her role in the team as the ‘less good’ one with more nonchalance; her personal code is still the same, eye for an eye, and she can sacrifice people for the greater good but not her people, and especially not Fitz, romantic link or not.  After being tortured (being burned) she did her best to compartmentalize it and focus on everything else, especially Hive, a nightmare coming true, but spent the rest of the time hyper-vigilant, with even more night terrors. Getting burned for any reason can also send her into panic. In verses following canon, she tried to rebuild her relationship with Fitz, in verse where single she kept more distance than usual from the entire team, and was ready to die to take down Hive instead of Lincoln or Daisy, out of guilt and despair, but of course Lincoln beat her to it and she blames herself for that too. It was supposed to be her sacrifice, because Hive came back through a portal opened because of her. After Maveth, she called her sister Cat, told her the truth about being SHIELD and the two became close again. She and her family still don't talk, they still don't know about her real job. If it's a verse with a Ward that didn't follow canon, Hive had Will's body and that made things even worse.

Season 4

Following canon, Jemma earns Mace's trust because she wants to be higher ranking and able to control everything and everyone, cover for her friends to keep them from getting fired and keep an eye on Mace. She used the fact that she expected people to buy her betraying her original team to be a lapdog to Mace, but was anyway hurt by her success in tricking other agents.  In verses where she's not dating anyone, she spent the six months of break not only doing this, but training more and going far more in the field, and got a place outside of SHIELD for herself. If she's not with Fitz but he confessed his feelings and it didn't work out, she also has feels guilty/thinks she can't have a relationship until Fitz has one. Her parents find out, finally that she's SHIELD; they force her to choose and eventually kick her out of the family (her sister Cat is not involved in this). Jemma is more comfortable with her idea of being a morally questionable person, at this point she just wants to get things done and protect her team/family. She wouldn’t easily believe other team members beside Fitz telling her she matters, she would be frustrated by the ‘lie’. In the second half of the season fighting with LMD Fitz and killing him left her broken, the memory of herself stabbing him over and over forever burned in her brain. She shrugged off waking in her grave, because at this point her attitude towards similar occurrences is to be bitter or dismissive. Her body was also under strain, between being stabbed, knocked out, choked, then put in the Framework. She's weak and in pain since then, she's very uncomfortable with soft touches to her face since that's what all enemies keep doing to her, with choke-holds, with the idea of ever fighting someone she knows for any reason, with people talking about 'tech' with pronouns like 'he/she'.  The Doctor was possibly less traumatizing than killing the LMD, but still left her shaken, as well as the knowledge that she wasn't able to save Fitz, whether he's her boyfriend or best friend.

In the first half Jemma would have joked a lot about “when I'm director of SHIELD” but she's actually only willing to work for people in the team that she has chosen (and that's the only place where she accepts taking orders – though she does rebel to them too sometimes)

Season 5

Most canon divergent of all. Jemma is beyond traumatized by being enslaved, since he took away her ability to even simply fight back, to speak up, her ability tocontrol anything at all, which is what she has used from the beginning to face things like torture. That, and being deaf, under his orders, no idea of where the team was and if they would even be able to reach her, hasn't helped. She has bursts of energy and happiness that led her to propose and to enjoy the wedding but that's mostly because everything happened so fast that they didn't have time to notice how broken she is. The recent traumatic events happened too fast too, and she tried to focus on taking care of Fitz whether they are dating or not, but now she's in no position to do that anymore. She can't stand negative attitudes for too long without falling apart very fast, she is still not a doctor even if she's been studying more and more when 'off the clock' to be better and the pressure kills her every time, she's uncomfortable when crowded, she's even more disturbed by silence, especially at night, when it's hard to tell where she is. She still tries to help, obviously, and to be strong, but she needs help and medical attention. 5x14 unless Fitz rpers or others plot something less canon compliant: After Fitz removes Daisy's inhibitor, in verses where they are married she tried to convince herself it was the right thing but ended up unable to believe that. She wants to help Fitz and feels guilty about abandoning him because he's in need of therapy, but she's not a therapist, she's not in a position to keep being supportive, she's afraid of what he could do to her too, and she's not going to agree with him, or dismiss what he did, she loves him but at the same time she’s not sure if he’s still going to be the man she fell in love with or a man she can keep falling in love with the way she wanted. She'll support him if he wants to get therapy after this last mission is done and leave with him, but she won't be able to be with him until she takes care of herself and feels safe around him, if that can even happen. No matter what happens in canon. They also never really got the chance to live ‘together’ and face things as a couple due to constant separations or being busy at work or keeping secrets, and that’s a big issue too.  In verses where she's not dating him, it's pretty much the same but platonically. She’s aware they needed Daisy’s powers to close the rift, but with everything that happened to her in the past two months she just can’t accept anything, which leaves her unable to take a stand. Mostly, she wants to run away. 

[officialotakudome]

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My Hero Academia Season 4 Review

With season 4 closed Midoriya Izuku and the the rest of Class 1-A finish their latest heroes in training adventure. This time they tackle the Chinese mafia and have a school festival. Izuku also meets number one hero student of UA Mirio “Lemillion” Togata and a girl who can erase quirks.

My Hero Academia is a 2016 shounen anime series, it is produced by Bones and licensed by Funimation. It is currently available for streaming and home media in English.

Editor’s Note: Near complete to complete spoilers for My Hero Academia season 4 may be present within this review. 

Midoriya faces new challenges as he continues his growth as a hero in season four.

Season four of My Hero Academia contains two canonical arcs; the Shie Hassaikai and school festival arcs. The former follows a villain named Overhaul who has a quirk that allows him to disassemble and reassemble anything he chooses in anyway he chooses. The second involves a school festival being planned by Class 1-A in an effort to renew their reputation after having recently been viewed in horrible light due to their consistent appearances within dangerous situations with pro heroes. Thus affecting the school’s reputation as a whole. A villain by the name of Gentle Criminal and his partner La Brava who had been gaining fame online plan to use the festival to become famous villains.

The UA students aide the pro heroes in a battle against a mafia.

THE GOOD: In the first episode of season four a reported is scouting UA for the next All Might after theorizing that his successor is a student there. He eventually learns that this person is in fact Midoriya but keeps it a secret. Following the filler episode, a villain by the name of Overhaul meets up with the League of Villains for an alliance after tricking Twice. After offering the League an opportunity to work for him and his group Shie Hassaikai. Tomura disagrees and a battle ensues resulting in the death of Magne and Mr. Compress suffering a major injury. Overhaul and his group leaves giving Tomura time to reconsider. During this time Midoriya and Class 1-A are taking hero work studies all except Bakugo, Shoto, and surprisingly Inasa Yoarashi who are forced to take provisional classes. In hero work studies the students work alongside pro heroes learn to adapt to perfecting the use of their powers within real-world danger. Midoriya attempts to team up with Torino, but he’s too busy instead suggesting he team up with All Might’s former sidekick turned pro hero Sir Nighteye. Midoriya meets UA’s top three heroes including Togata, Tamaki Amajiki, and Nejire Hado. Togata challenges and effortlessly beats the class in a one vs group fight. Midoriya & Togata bond over their love for All Might and similar inspirations for heroism. Togata reveals that he is being taught under Sir Nighteye getting a meeting between him and Midoriya.

Upon seeing Nighteye, Midoriya is met with instant hostility. Due to Togata having originally being planned as the successor for One For All ultimately being usurped by Midoriya. This along with Nighteye’s vision of All Might’s impending death caused a rift between the two with the duo going their separate ways. Nighteye challenges Midoriya to grab his stamp in order to be approved to join his work study. Midoriya fails, but gets the work study anyways by slightly impressing Nighteye. Nighteye also states that this is to further prove that Mirio Togata is the true heir of One For All. While out in public for their work studies Mirio in his Lemillion gear and Midoriya as Deku patrol the city and encounter a girl with a horn on her head. Midoriya takes note of the girl’s fear and opts to protect as Overhaul appears filling Midoriya and the girl with terror. Under Togata’s guidance he and Midoriya let the girl go with Overhaul instantly regretting their decision. Nighteye reveals that he is apart of a team of pro heroes currently investigating Overhaul & Shie Hassaikai who is using the horned girl Eri’s quirk to develop quirk erasing bullets. Having feel they failed as heroes upon their initial meeting Togata and Midoriya swear to save Eri at all cost. Overhaul is unveiled to have purposely injured the original leader of Shie when he disagreed with his methods promising to return him to health upon his goals having been reached.

The other students of Class 1-A also doing their work studies get involved with a raid on the Shie Hassaikai headquarters which was unveiled when Nighteye tailed a member of the group buying a toy for Eri. The Big 3 and a pro hero named Fat Gum among others also join. Fat Gum being Red Riot’s pro hero for his work study bonds with Riot who was starting to lose confidence in his abilities. As the raid begins the heroes are forced to split up with much of the battle taking place outside of the HQ, Fat Gum & Red Riot are split up from the group and encounter Kendo Rappa & Tengai Keiji. They battle in a two on two fight and Red is easily overpowered by Kendo’s powerful arms who’s also being backed up by Tengai’s shield quirk. As Fat Gum takes most of the punishment he’s secretly absorbing each blow and storing it for an all-out attack. Red remembers his past with Mina Ashido and his failure to aide their classmates in a villain attack pre-UA while she took action. Resolving to never stand by again Red recovers and takes a barrage of Kendo’s attacks giving Fat the time he needs to unleash his counterattack before going unconscious. Meanwhile the League of Villains who earlier decided to join Shie are actually plotting to destroy them from within and during the raid they sabotage the group by insulting Irinka; a member of Shie who could merge his mind and body with nearly anything including walls and separated the raid group doing so.  

Nighteye and Midoriya reach Overhaul who’s holding Eri hostage while planning his escape. Nighteye faces off against him but is gravely injured in the battle. Nighteye notes that he foresaw a vision where Midoriya is killed by Overhaul in their battle. Overhaul was in a fight with Lemillion who separated from the group earlier reaching him first. Lemillion also lost his power from one of the bullets while protecting Eri, but fought until he suffered a severe injury from Overhaul. Midoriya was tasked with getting Lemillion & Eri to safety, but with Nighteye incapacitated he’s forced to fight Overhaul himself. Midoriya struggles to keep up with Overhaul’s power, but resolves to save Eri and the two escape outside after the heroes from the front of HQ attempt to lend a hand. Overhaul relentlessly pursuits Midoriya and Eri who uses Eri’s quirk to momentarily unlick One For All’s full 100% power defeating Overhaul after gaining a hang of it. The pro heroes arrest the Shie Hassaikai members except for Overhaul who was taken by the League of Villains where Tomura decays a badly beaten Overhaul’s arms and steals the quirk erasing bullets. Overhaul screams terror realizing he can’t heal Shie’s leader. Eri is placed in the care of UA under Aizawa & the Big 3’s watch. Nighteye is recovering from his wounds, but ultimately succumbs to his injuries dying happy to know that his visions can in fact be changed. 

New heroes make their debut in season four.

Eri is recovering from a fever due to her powers and is being watched over by UA. Meanwhile Class 1-A has been receiving resentment from other students due to their consistent involvement in pro hero/villain danger. The class decide to hold a school festival to recover their reputation as well as boost the overall reputation of UA. Each student takes on different tasks such as decorations, designs, and talents including a musical performance by those who are trained to play instruments. Initially refusing to join Bakugo, who’s a known skilled drummer decides to help out with the festival mainly to show off. As preparations for the festival are underway new villains have been making the waves online by the name of Gentle Criminal and La Brava. There online presence slowly gained prominence on social media. Gentle was once trained to be a hero, but failed and became a regular citizen. He met up with a classmate who became a pro hero and didn’t even recognize Gentle causing him to become a villain. As a villain Gentle was ignored before he partnered up with La Brava who fell in love with him during his first attempts to gain fame and used her tech skills to increase their awareness online.

The UA students attend Nighteye’s funeral and Eri wakes up but she hasn’t stabilized. Eri asks to see Togata and Midoriya and says she felt guilty over all the trouble she caused, but Midoriya attempts to reassure her trying to make her smile. Midoriya plans to use the festival to get Eri to smile. Meanwhile Bakugo and the others training under their provisional classes must learn to win the hearts of the younger students, eventually winning them over by combining their quirks to create a makeshift theme park for them. With the finishing preparations for the festival underway Midoriya runs one last quick errand before encountering Gentle & La Brava. Initially disguised Midoriya finds them out and learns of their plans to use the school festival to become famous villains. Midoriya chases after them and is nearly beaten by Gentle when La Brava activates her quirk to give him a power boost. But he’s able to subdue them in time for pro heroes to arrive. Gentle takes the fall for La Brava who impresses the pro heroes with her tech skills. Midoriya is nearly late for the festival but makes it in time. Togata is by Eri’s side as she begins to enjoy herself and finally smiles following the musical performance by Class 1-A. The class regain the respect of the other students when the festival ends. During the Japanese Hero Billboard conference Endeavor is revealed as the number one hero along with Hawks as the number two. The citizens are noticeably wary of Endeavor being number one due to his questionable history as a hero. It is revealed that Hawks is possibly aligned with the League of Villains after meeting with Dabi. A high-end Nomu attacks the city and nearly kills Endeavour as Hawks saves nearby citizens. Endeavour with Hawks’ support is able to defeat it and gains the admiration of the people after nearly giving his life to protect them like All Might. Midoriya has a dream of the past One For All owners including All For One’s brother. They shake hands and he awakes to his arm glowing.

The class of A-1 meets top student Mirio Togata.

The fourth season of My Hero Academia is a high octane of animation quality (a Bones trademark), voice acting, and music. The source material is done an incredible amount of service in animated form which rivals the biggest of budgets. Ace character development and growth along with excellent world building continues the stellar portfolio the franchise has become known for.

My Hero Academia’s stellar character development continues.

THE BAD: Outside of some animation problems here & there and some censorship you’d be hard pressed finding much issues with season four of My Hero Academia. 

Midoriya reaches a glimpse of his true power in season four.

OVERALL THOUGHTS: My Hero Academia’s more often than not unmatched quality continues to put it’s anime adaptation several steps above other shounen. With a rare ability to develop an entire cast of characters the series almost never misses it’s stride and continues to ride on high. Otaku Dome gives My Hero Academia season 4 a 90 out of 100.

[atlanticcanada]

After knife attack on Appalachian Trail, Maritime hiker shares plan to finish trek

MONCTON, N.B. -- Kirby Morrill has loved sports since she was a young girl. At the University of New Brunswick, she was a rugby star, celebrated for her "off-the-charts" tackling. But for close to a decade she had dreamed of another physical achievement -- hiking the 3,500-kilometre Appalachian Trail.

Stretching from Springer Mountain in Georgia to Mount Katahdin in Maine, the trail is a daunting challenge, and only about one in four hikers who set out to cover the full distance reach the end.

"Everyone in New Brunswick knows about Mount Katahdin," Morrill, 28, told The Canadian Press in a recent interview. She said that after learning that the mountain was the northern terminus of the famed trail, "I started to look at the Appalachian Trail and added it to my list of things to accomplish in my life."

In March, after defending her Master of Science thesis, Morrill flew from Halifax to Atlanta to begin a solo hike that, if all went well, would get her to Maine by fall.

Soon, though, her life would change forever. An attack by an armed man at a campsite would leave a fellow hiker dead and Morrill gravely injured and fighting for her life, forced to hike 10 kilometres through the darkness to find help. Others in the hiking community say her story of determination and survival inspired them to forge on. And as she continues to recover from her injuries, she is already planning a return next year to finish what she began.

Back in May, a mobile app used by hikers had been buzzing with talk of a hiker who was threatening people on the Appalachian Trail. Warnings and descriptions of the man and his dog had been posted. By May 10, Morrill, who grew up in rural Belleisle, N.B., had passed the quarter-way point, and all was going well -- aside from the recent loss of her food to a scavenging bear.

"I stopped at a restaurant because another hiker was going to meet me there with a new food bag for me," she recounted. Seated at the restaurant, she saw the hiker she now refers to as "the crazy guy with the knife" walking down the road.

"I left a note at the register at the restaurant to warn people. I figured my best bet was to get past him and continue on without having to see him again," she said.

That evening, Morrill chose a campsite where three other people were staying, including Ron Sanchez, a hiker she had met days earlier during her ordeal with the bear.

"He was really comforting. He was a really great guy," she said. "I really appreciated him, so it was nice to see him at that campsite again."

The peace was soon shattered when the threatening hiker she had seen in town showed up.

Morrill is guarded about what she says about the ensuing hours in case she has to testify in court.

"As far as I know he didn't have a tent, and he wandered around the campsite talking to himself," she said. He sang to himself for half an hour by the campfire. "And then he came around to the tents threatening to kill us in a variety of ways and telling us why we deserved to die," she said.

Morrill said the intruder retreated into the woods, and she decided she would pack up and leave. The other three hikers decided to do the same, and all were in the process of gathering their belongings when the man returned.

Morrill said two others managed to escape, but she and Sanchez were confronted. She said Sanchez was attacked first. The 43-year-old U.S. Army veteran from Oklahoma would later die of his injuries.

"I was pinned. Because we had packed up and tried to get out of there with all our things, I had everything on me. I had a 30-something-pound pack on my back, and when he came at me, he came at my front, so I fell onto my back like a turtle, and he was on top of me," she said. "There was nothing I could do."

It was pitch dark, and Morrill said she believes at some point her attacker thought she was dead.

"He had fallen on top of me and switched from stabbing at me to beating on the side of my head. So I held my breath and I held still," she said. "Eventually he stopped and he got up and stood over me for what felt like forever. I tried not to breathe."

The attacker eventually left, and she was able to get up, deciding to head south along the trail to where she knew other hikers would be camped, about 10 kilometres away. She didn't immediately realize the extent of her injuries.

"I had so much adrenaline coursing through me at that point, I barely felt it. It was just kind of a general feeling of badness, like something is wrong here," she said.

"I knew immediately my right arm didn't work. My left arm wasn't working very well at all, and after I got up and started moving around, every time I took a step there was (blood) spurting from my leg."

Despite her injuries, Morrill walked as quickly as she could, blood streaming down her face. After about a kilometre on the trail, she tried to use duct tape to patch her leg, but there was too much blood and only one of her arms was working. Dropping the blood-soaked tape on the ground, she felt a tinge of guilt because the hikers' credo is to leave the trail as they find it.

It took Morrill about three hours to hike to the next camp. She was flown from Wythe County, Va., to a hospital across the state line in Tennessee. She said she had nine stab wounds and 40 individual lacerations, requiring about 50 staples and 10 sutures across her face. "I look like scarface now," she said, smiling.

She said she has been spared survivor's guilt. "I actually believe I made the best decisions I could. I might not be happy with the results, because we lost Ron. That's the hardest part for me because he was a great guy," she said, her voice breaking, "but I don't think I could have helped him any more than I did."

James Jordan, 30, of West Yarmouth, Mass., was arrested in the hours after the attack and charged with murder and assault with intent to commit murder. He is undergoing treatment after being found unfit to stand trial by a federal judge in Virginia in July.

Shortly after the attack, a man who publishes a hiker yearbook for the Appalachian Trail said Morrill's strength and courage inspired other hikers to continue their trek. But Morrill is reluctant to accept any praise.

"I'm happy if it helps some people cement their decision to stay on the trail, especially since I understand that it's the mental component of hiking the trail that's the hardest for people ... but there's nothing special about me," she said.

Recovery has been slow, involving painful physiotherapy, exercise and weightlifting in an effort to restore feeling and the use of various muscles, especially in her arms.

Despite the discomfort, Morrill was back on the Appalachian Trail in September, although just for a day. While recovering in hospital, she had promised two hikers she had met on the trail she would join up with them when they reached Mount Katahdin.

"We went up Katahdin together," she said. "I started the trail and I finished the trail. I just skipped a big part in the middle." Morrill said she had to fight not to cry as she reached the peak.

But that wasn't the end of her journey. Morrill plans to head back to the Appalachian Trail in March -- not just picking up where her first attempt was cut short, but starting anew at Springer Mountain.

"I always wanted to do the whole trail from end to end, and I didn't get to do it," she said. She'll be carrying emotional baggage along with her pack.

"It's not the kind of thing you walk away from unscathed," she said. "But I can say I am doing blissfully better than I might have expected. I'm doing surprisingly fine."

This report by The Canadian Press was first published Dec. 9, 2019.

from CTV News - Atlantic https://ift.tt/2rwQdcq