#her boyfriend might need to use it and I’ll be in there and they’ll ask me to go

[okcoolthanks]

Oyea forgot to post it earlier day 11 kitty tattoo‼️‼️

[coldfanbou]

It Started as a Rental

So to explain this piece, me and @i-am-lifeform24 were both struggling and decided to challenge each other with a concept decided by the other person.

Length 2.9K

Hanni X Mreader

Waiting outside the cafe, you look around, waiting for your date to arrive. You flick through your phone, looking through her profile again. “Hey? Is this you?” You look down at the petite woman in front of you, her long, straight hair swinging as she comes to a stop. It was your girlfriend for the night, Hanni. She held her phone up to you, showing your profile. 

“Yeah, that’s me. Let’s head inside,” You say, opening the door to the cafe and letting her in first. As you order and sit down, you think about your situation. It was a bit pathetic having to rent a girlfriend, but you thought it necessary. Your sister’s wedding was coming up, and you didn’t want to be the only one without a partner; you had bluffed your way into making your family believe you were dating. You just need to find the right woman to bring with you, and Hanni was the first profile you liked after a friend told you about the website for renting girlfriends.

“It’s nice to meet you,” you say nervously, trying to start a conversation. 

“Let’s get down to business before this date really begins,” she says politely, with a hint of amusement. Getting this part out of the way first is a lot easier. So, you hired me for five days, one of them being a wedding. I hope you're prepared to play the role of a loving boyfriend." She ruffles through her purse as she looks for something. “You saw my rate on the website; there is just the matter of extras that I personally provide.”

You give her a quizzical look, “Extras? What do you mean extras?”

“Well, most guys want to have sex, and that costs extra. The website might say sex isn’t allowed, but I’m willing to make some…under the table deals. There are limits to what I’m willing to do, and each thing will raise the price, so I just need you to fill this out so I can name a price.” Hanni hands you the piece of paper with kinks listed on one side and prices on the other. 

“Uhm, I’m not interested in this. I just need you for the wedding and these few days to get to know you.”

“Oh, well, that's alright then. I’ll just bring this along with me if you change your mind,” Hanni says, somewhat surprised. She grabs the paper and places it back in her bag. Let’s have fun these next few days.” Hanni puts her bag down and gives you a gentle smile as your drinks arrive. The next few days, you and her go out to different places, and you learn more about her. After your initial worry melts away, you begin to feel close to her.

The day before the wedding, you meet with Hanni again. As you walk by your cafe meeting spot, you find her munching on a piece of bread. She excitedly waves at you, “Right here!” She yells with a mouthful of bread. You take a seat beside her, feeling a little shy as you feel her kiss your cheek. “Did you sleep well?” 

You give her a nod, “Yeah, I slept well. Thanks for asking, did you?” 

“Mhmm! I dreamt of you last night.” She says with a giggle. 

“The wedding is tomorrow. Are you ready?”

“Ready as can be,” Hanni says, taking a sip of her coffee before returning to her bread. “I have my dress picked out and everything. She grabs your hands suddenly; you can feel the crumbs on her fingers as she intertwines your hands. “I’m really nervous about meeting your family. Do you think they’ll like me?”

“I’m sure they’ll love you, Hanni. Come on, we have a busy day ahead of us.” You say as you stand up, taking Hanni by the hand as you walk out of the cafe. Spending the day looking at clothes for the wedding, you can’t help but think about Hanni’s beauty and just how cute she was. Hanni lifted a dress off one of the racks, placing it in front of herself and imagining how she looked in it. 

“Do you think this is okay?” The dress she chose was a simple black one; it had oval gaps along the chest as a distinguishing feature. It wouldn’t attract any attention at the wedding otherwise. “I think I’m going to try it on,” Hanni says before scurrying to the closest changing room. She comes out a few minutes later wearing her chosen dress. You looked her up and down; she looked cute. If she had a different shirt under it, it would look better, and you told her so. Hanni pouted before looking around the store and finding a shirt she thought would look better. It had some slight frills that she liked, and as she came back out of the dressing room, you thought she was right. Her outfit was nearly perfect. “How about now?”

“You look great,” you gulp, “Really pretty.” You bring a smile to Hanni's face. She jumps toward you, wrapping her arms around you. You slowly wrap your arms around her, enjoying the hug until you feel her arms tap your side. You let her go, and she changes back to her regular clothes before you begin to search for your clothes. You’re forced to change into several outfits as Hanni hands you several different pieces of clothing, unsatisfied with each one. “Hanni! We’ve gone through so many clothes. Is there nothing that looks good?” You complain.

She brings you another outfit and kisses your cheek as she hands it to you. “I’m sure this is the one.” Her soft smile is enough to convince you, and you head back into the dressing room. As you come back out, Hanni claps her hands, her teeth shining, and she smiles. “That’s the one!” Hanni walks around you, looking it over one more time as she compliments it. As you head to the register, you pay for both sets of clothes. “I can pay for the dress and shirt.”

“No, I got it. Let me take care of it.”

Hanni looks at her feet for a second, and a small sniffle escapes her before she meets your eyes. “Thank you.” After you leave the building, Hanni spins around on her heel, beaming a smile to you.“We have everything now.”

“Yeah, I can pick you up tomorrow for the wedding.”

“No, no. I’ll meet you at your place. Just give me the address. I’ll be there early in the morning.” 

You nod your head. “Alright, that sounds good.” After you give her directions, you and Hanni part ways for the day. 

As you walk away, Hanni grabs your arm, turns you around, and presses her lips onto yours, having to stand on her tippy toes to do so. “There, now we can say bye. Get home safely.” She says with some concern in her voice.

“You get home safely, too.” 

Early the next morning, you wake up after hearing a knock on your door. Hanni is waiting in her wedding outfit. You blink a few times and rub your eyes as you stare at her. She had added a pair of thigh-high socks with a small bow design around her knees and a bow around her head. She gives you a simple smile. “Wake up, sleepy head.” She says cheerily. Today’s the big day, and we need to get you ready. I’ll make you breakfast while you get yourself dressed, okay?”

“Yeah, thanks, Hanni.” You say before kissing the top of her forehead. 

She playfully pushes you away, her small hands cupping your cheeks. “Stop!” She yells, a smile on her face. “You’re going to ruin my makeup. Go change already, mister.” She watches you walk into your room, looking over her shoulder to make sure you didn’t sneak up on her. When you come back out a few minutes later, Hanni is sitting by the counter with an omelet. “You…didn’t have very much in your fridge.” She says weakly.

“Today is when I normally go for the groceries,” You reply. 

Hanni pats the seat next to her, “Sit. Let me feed you.” You follow along, sitting next to her as she stabs into the eggs and brings some to your lips. “Say Ahhh.” You open your mouth and take in the freshly cooked eggs. Hanni giggles as she watches you chew. “How is it? Good?”

“Yeah, it’s good. Thanks, Hanni, you’re a pretty good cook.”

“You have to be when you like food,” she says with a chuckle. Now, eat up; we have to get there early.” Hanni takes the time to wipe your face. “You look very handsome in this,” she says as her eyes meet yours.

“You look beautiful too. I really like the bows; they’re cute on you.” You pinch Hanni’s cheek; it’s squishy. You finish breakfast before heading to the chapel, where you introduce Hanni to your family. She greets them well, making a good first impression. 

“I think they like me.” She says as she sits next to you on the bench. 

“Why wouldn’t they like you? You’re so cute and cuddly.”

“Don’t embarrass me!” Hanni slaps your hand away as you try to pinch her cheeks. She gives you a cute pout, her eyebrows furrowing as she tries to look angry. A few seconds later, she breaks, smiling and laughing, and she links her arm around yours. “I hope this part isn’t too long. I get antsy if I sit for too long.” Lucky for the two of you, it was a short ceremony, and you were soon off to the party.

You felt happy with Hanni by your side as you made your way to your seat. She attracted some attention as people asked how she ended up with you. It hurt your pride that they would ask that in front of you, but Hanni’s response made you feel warm and fuzzy inside. “Why wouldn’t I be? He’s kind and makes me feel safe. He makes me feel special when we’re together. I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else.” She’d say those words while she held your hand, sometimes holding your arm tightly. As you sat down with her, Hanni scooted her chair closer. “Some of your family can be very mean. Do we have to stay here for a long time? I’d rather just spend my time with you.” 

“Just a little while. They’re going to want to do a few dances.” Hanni nods her head, staying by you the entire party. When it was time for the couple dances, Hanni gripped you tightly; your hand and shoulder felt like they were going to be crushed. “A little looser would be great, Hanni.”

“Oh, sorry,” Hanni says as she loosens her grip. You stare into her eyes, knowing she’ll be gone after this. You can’t help but get a little teary-eyed as you look at her. Hanni tilts her head, giving you a confused look. “Don’t cry. There’s no way it hurt that much.” She says, wiping away your tears with one of her hands. “There, all better.” She places her head on your chest as the dance continues. Once it was over, you and Hanni took your leave, wishing everyone well before making your way home. “That was fun, wasn’t it?” She says as she kicks her shoes off. 

You take a seat on the couch, taking a deep breath before looking over at Hanni. She strolls over to you, her hair swaying as she comes to a stop in front of you. She places a hand over your chest and straddles you. You’re caught off guard by her actions. “Hanni?”

“Just this once, I won’t charge you,” You’re confused by her words, but your train of thought goes off the tracks when you feel her press her lips against yours. Her hands move down your biceps to your forearms before she places your hands on her waist. Her hands shift to your shoulders, holding onto them as you feel her grind against you.  

You hold your lips against Hanni’s, your hands digging into her. When you finally break apart, you stare at each other in silence. Hanni undoes the buttons on her dress and lifts it over her shoulders, leaving her in her shirt. You kiss her neck softly as she begins to lift her shirt; your hands snake under it, and you squeeze her modest chest through her bra as she throws it off. Your eyes move up and down her body, taking in her perfectly smooth skin and the clothes she was left in. All that remained were her bra, panties, and her thigh highs. You run your fingers along her spine, moving up toward her bra. You can feel her shiver. Unlatching her bra, you drop it to the floor. You lean in and kiss Hanni’s chest, leaving a trail of kisses as you move upward. She cranes her neck back, cooing. “Take your clothes off, too.” She whines. 

You stop for her, throwing your blazer and shirt off with haste. Hanni helps you with your pants, having to stand up to pull them off you. Now clad in only your underwear, you stare into Hanni’s eyes again. You both knew what you wanted. You leaned down and picked Hanni up. Carrying her to the bedroom, she wrapped her arms and legs around you, clinging to you as you kissed her neck again. 

You dropped Hanni onto your bed, on top of her, before you stripped her of her underwear. She was shaved. As your eyes wander upward, you notice her breathing heavily. You take the time to get rid of the last piece of clothing keeping you from one another. Crawling back over her, you press your lips against hers, your hands running up and down her thighs. You felt her thigh highs; the thin fabric was smooth to the touch, allowing your hands to continue gliding over her. Hanni spreads her legs slowly, and you take notice. You glance down and reach for her slit. Hanni trembles as she feels your fingers run along it. A gentle moan escapes her lips as you tease her.  Hanni holds onto the bedsheets as her mind becomes filled with the pleasure you’re giving her. 

Your fingers were becoming slick as you teased Hanni, your cock began to ache as you watched the petite woman enjoy herself. Your cock tapped against her belly. Hanni looked down and reached for it, her small hand struggling to wrap around it. You groan as her palm rubs against the head. “Don’t tease me anymore,” Hanni moans. She stretches her legs outward and pulls apart her lips. You take a step back, taking in every detail. “Please…fuck me.”  

You gulp and nod your head slowly. Aligning yourself with Hanni’s cunt you push the head in slowly, watching her reaction. Hanni cranes her neck, her eyes closed as she grips the sheets and lets out a deep groan. You hold onto Hanni’s waist, shuddering as you feel her walls squeezing your cock from all sides. You push more inside of Hanni, feeling her walls split apart as you move deeper into her. You moan her name, feeling her walls tighten around you as you do. 

Hanni grabs your wrists, gripping them tightly. “Keep going; I feel so full.” You thrust the rest of your cock inside. Both of you moan loudly, filling the room with the sound. Hanni wraps her legs around your waist; you can feel her feet trying to push you further inside.  You remain buried inside Hanni for a moment, allowing you both to catch your breath. You thrust slowly at first before picking up some speed. Hanni’s warm and wet walls rub the head of your cock as you push in, granting you great pleasure. Her moans are like music to your ears, but you can’t resist her lovely lips. You steal a kiss from her, muffling her beautiful moans. Her arms wrap around your head, keeping you connected to her. 

The rhythm of your thrusts breaks down as you go on; you can feel yourself nearing your climax. Hanni’s walls began to squeeze you tighter as well. You met her eyes and saw she was reaching her limit. “Hanni, I’m going to cum.”

“Me too,” She whimpers; her hands wrap around you tightly, and she pushes you in deeper with her legs. “It’s okay if you cum inside,” She whispers into your ear.

You give her a few more thrusts before cumming inside of her cunt. Hanni’s wall clamps down on your cock as you trigger her climax. You paint her walls white as her cunt greedily takes it all. 

Pulling out slowly, you stare at Hanni’s body. She had a thin layer of sweat over her. You fall beside her, staring at her. She turns onto her side, staring back at you. A soft smile forms on her face. “I’d love it if we could meet again.” She says with a hint of shyness in her voice. There’s a moment of silence between the two of you, “I…um, had a really good time with you these past few days. You weren’t like the others.” Hanni pauses again, “I meant what I said at the wedding. You’re really a good guy, and…” Hanni struggles to find the words. “Do…you want to meet again? I mean…without the website.”

You caress Hanni’s cheek, your thumb moving across it gently. She places her hand over the top of yours. “I’d love to go on another date.” Hanni gives you a sincere smile and moves closer to you, burying her head in your chest as you both drift off to sleep.

[imagineanime2022]

Little Sister

Illumi Zoldyck X Sister!Reader

Word Count: 2062

Requested: Anon

Request: Could you possibly do a one shot with illumi and a younger sister similar to daki pretty pls who’s also a good assassin and is prided on her looks 😊 AND Basically Illumi little sister (reader) gets a S/O and they cheat on us so we run to him in tears what would he do? How would he handle it? How would he comfort us? AND Hiii can you do brother head canons for illumi with a sister who’s about 15-16 so in the middle of milluki and killua who is like a great assassin but also very like caring with him and similar to daki/ume from demon slayer pls!🐺 AND Can you do a one shot or just headcannons(Whatever you prefer) with a reader who is the third oldest Zoldyck who is a amazing assassin who doesn’t fail while also looking after all her siblings and trying to keep the family together pls :)

You had, much like the rest of your family, established your place in the criminal underworld, your ability to assassinate people without leaving so much as a trace was sought after everywhere, you were good at blending into the shadows, your nen ability markedly more dangerous than some of your siblings. You were an emitter type with the ability to turn any bodily fluid into a poisonous substance, something untraceable with subtle symptoms for the most part well until the asphyxia set in.

Illumi was the brother that you were closest to, he liked working with you and when you were younger he spent the most time with you, Milluki was too busy trying to get his mothers approval and Illumi honestly couldn't care less and that led him to watch you more carefully. He started training you young when he realised your ability was manifesting, you had accidentally killed two butlers when you had gotten injured playing in the garden. He noticed when you were young that you were very pretty, and the compliments that you got from others made it an asset that you could use. Even now at the age of 16 it was the selling point for most of your jobs.

The family was starting to crack now that Killua had decided to leave, with all bets placed on him for the next leader of the family, the adults were scrambling even if they tried to hide it. Illumi was off tracking him down, well that was a strong term at the very least you and Illumi knew where he was, the hunter exam. You decided that it wouldn’t be a bad idea to have a hunter licence since travel was such a pain when you were on jobs. That was how you found yourself in the underground tunnel waiting for the exam to actually start. You came in as contestant 320 with your boyfriend as number 321. Your eyes found Killua who was already looking at you.

“What are you doing here?” He asked, “I’m not going home.” “I’m not here to take you back, travelling is really hard these days, the licence is going to make that way easier and we both know that we can get through this no problem.” You shrugged and he smiled. “Is Dad mad?” He asked. “Honestly I don’t think so, I think he wants you to go home though.” You answered. “Go find some friends, they’ll be good to have, there’s going to be some stages where you need them.” You turned to walk away feeling someone watching you, you looked over to see a man in green, pins in his face and jerky movements. You continued walking as you got close enough he spoke. “You aren’t supposed to be here?” He said and it was then that you realised who it was, Illumi. “Well, I figured that it might be worth getting a licence and since you're both here why not make it a family outing? Don’t worry I’ll stay out of you and your friends' way.” Your eyes travelled to Hisoka who was leaning against the wall a few paces away, he smirked when his eyes met yours. “Mm, what did you bring him for?” Illumi asked as he gestured towards your boyfriend. “(Y/B/N) is here for a licence too, he wanted one.” You rolled your eyes at your brother’s dislike towards your chosen companion. “Remember not to let your guard down.” He warned. “There’s nothing to worry about.” You waved him off as you walked back over to your boyfriend. “Who was that?” He asked. “I don’t know some creepy guy, guess he’s sizing up the competition.” You answered.

It took two tasks for things to break down you had managed to get separated in the tower, that didn’t cause you any problems and you finished as one of the first, with Hisoka and Illumi being some of the people that you noticed first, as time ticked down you started to worry that you’d have to complete the rest of the tasks alone. Hisoka was the one that came over to you while you were sitting alone. “You know you don’t need to wait for him, I doubt that he’ll get much further.” He said. “What does it matter to you?” Your eyes hadn’t moved from the timer, you could see Illumi in the corner of your eye. “Honestly, it’s rather annoying to watch you handicap yourself so readily, little assassin.” Hisoka answered. “You should know that he’s using you.” “Using me?” You asked with a frown. “What do you mean?” Before Hisoka could answer your question the door opened and out stumbled (Y/B/N) but behind him was a girl, you had seen her throughout the exam, she hadn’t ever approached him while you were with him. “Look at his shirt.” Hisoka prompted before standing and leaving you alone, your eyes travelled to (Y/B/N)’s shirt, it seemed to have been thrown on haphazardly or recently ruffled you couldn’t tell, he walked over and smiled. “I’m glad that you made it.” He smiled. “Same to you.” You smiled, plastering on the fake emotion so naturally as you noticed the smell of the girl on him, everything was adding up to a conclusion that you really didn’t want to think about, not right now.

You sat on the boat taking you to the island that the next task would take place on, you looked at the badge number in your hand 321, (Y/B/N)’s number. You could definitely pass without taking his badge but as you looked at him, the way his eyes now wondered, you realised that you weren’t so sure that you wanted to. You decided to talk to him about the tower. You hadn’t noticed in your pondering that he had disappeared, you attempted to find him and it honestly didn’t take long given your occupation, the problem was the position that him in, the girl that he had come out of the tower with pressed against the wall, they hadn’t even realised that you were there, tears gathering in your eyes as you glared at them. She was the one to notice you but you weren’t sure if it was you or the presence behind you that made them look. “O-oh I-” “You what?” You asked, the presence behind you seemed to have disappeared from the moment he looked back at you. “Look, I don't think we’re going to work.” He said. “Oh really, was that before or after you put your tongue down her throat?” You asked. “You know what? You want to know the truth?” He asked. “Yes!” You answered. “You really aren’t that pretty, you’ve been convenient and honestly you’ve gotten rid of a lot of obstacles. I was hoping that you would be able to get me through this last task but it seems like that won’t be the case.” He explained and you looked at him frozen in place, your family had always told you that you shouldn’t put trust in other people but now you understood why and all you wanted to do was turn around and run but this time the presence you felt before seemed closer and you saw your brother’s long hair out of the corner of your eye. “Are you really going to let him talk to you like that?” He asked. “He’s seems to have taken something from you, I think it’s time that you take it back, little sister.” “Later.” You answered as you held the badge up so that they could all see it “after all you're my target on the island I think I’ll take everything from you there.” “That sounds like a perfect plan.” Illumi answered “and the girl?” “Isn’t that your number, big brother?” You asked.

The island itself had not been a problem, you had been tracking (Y/B/N) and the girl, they were sporadic and jerky in their movements they were trying to preemptively shake you off but you wouldn’t be in the occupation that you were that easily shook off, they stopped for the night and that was when you made your move. “You're stopping here?” You asked from your place in the branches. “Y-you found us?” He asked. “I found you.” You answered “I made a promise, I really need your badge.” “Here, have it!” He threw the badge at you and you smiled picking it up off the floor. “Thank you.” From your crouched position you looked up at him. “T-then go.” He ordered. “No.” You answered as you dove forward, dagger taken from the holster on your as you pressed your knee to his throat, the girl screaming. “Sit down, shut up and I might have mercy on you.” You turned back to him “now back to you, you never asked me what my nen ability was, you really should have because you would have known that everytime you kissed me I chose to let you live.” You moved your knee from his neck moving to straddle him pressing your lips to his as your ability activated, you stood as you walked over to the girl who was still sitting on the ground. ���I-I did as y-you said.” She stuttered. “You did.” You said softly as taking her chin in your hand. “You said that you would let me go.” She said, tone lifting in hope as you looked at her and shook your head. “I said I’d have mercy and that just means you don’t die slowly and alone like he does.” You explained. “W-wait don’t I have your brother’s number!? I don’t have my badge see” she pointed to her top “if you kill me you’ll never find it.” “It’s a good thing he doesn’t need it then.” You smirked, her eyes widened “yeah I lied because I knew it would force you to stay with him under the impression that he’d be able to keep you safe, stupid assumption really.” “I-I’m sorry.” She cried. “I’m sure you are.” You nodded before yanking her head to the side and effectively breaking her neck. “Nicely done.” Illumi’s voice emitted over the clearing standing over your dying ex. “Do you have your badge?” You asked. “Mm.” He hummed while holding the badge. “Then I will see you in 3 days.” You muttered as you left the clearing and the dead bodies that you had created there as well.

A few days later you found yourself back home, Killua was back home as well and while he was supposedly being punished for everything that he had done you decided that you should go and talk to your father about, he was the only one that could change anything that was happening “Dad, can I talk to you?” You asked. “Of course, come over here.” Your Dad prompted, he’d always had a soft spot for you, his only daughter, well the only one he acknowledged. “What do you want to talk about?” “Killua.” You answered as you settled next to him. “What about him?” Your Dad asked. “I think we should let him see the world, he’s going to have to at some point, he’ll never run the family if it seems like a prison.” You answered, the silence that followed made you rethink “sorry I have overstepped.” “No, no, it’s not that… You think that he will come back?” Your father asked. “I do.” You nodded. “If we give him reason to.” “And why did you come to talk to me about all of this?” He asked. “I want the family to stay together and I thought this was the best way.” You explained. “Mmm, thank you. Let me talk to your brother.” He said, pressing a kiss to your forehead before you got up to leave. “Once this is done I want to hear about what happened, Illumi said there was something that I should hear of.” “Okay Dad.” You answered as you left the room.

It was only voicing your opinion but you hoped it was enough you wanted everyone in the family to be happy and for it to stay together and it only seemed fair that Killua found his way back to the family on his own rather than being forced. You only hoped that your father headed your advice.

Request Here!!

[rollingsins]

all hers, part xiv

part i | part ii | part iii | part iv | part v | part vi | part vii | part viii | part ix | part x | part xi | part xii | part xiii | part xiv | part xv | part xvi | part xvii | part xviii | part xix | part xx | part xxi | part xxii | part xxiii | part xxiv | part xxv | part xxvi | epilogue

summary: The scooby-gang formulate a plot to stop Ghostface in his tracks. Tara and R deal with the aftermath of the attack.

warnings: (+18), Tara is Ghostface, smut, 18+. pussy-eating, vaginal fingering, face-sitting, rim jobs, mention of anal sex.

word count: 3.5k

a/n: 👀 smut delivered as per popular request. as always, thanks so much for your support - let me know what you want to see next!

The morning passes in a blur. 

Tara is glued to your side throughout, scouring the hallways and the backs of classrooms like Ghostface might pop out at any second. 

In a combination of her morning vigilance and lack of sleep, her eyes are red and watery by lunchtime. 

You sit together in the cafeteria, her head resting against your shoulder, her eyes drooping slightly. Her food is left untouched. 

“What’s wrong with her?” Liv asks as she settles down into the seat opposite you. 

You press a protective hand to the top of Tara’s head, thread your fingers through her dark hair. 

“She didn’t sleep well, that’s all.” You say.

“I wouldn’t sleep well either if my girlfriend was being hunted by Ghostface,” Chad says without thinking, his mouth full. 

Liv smacks him. If Tara hears his comment, she doesn’t react, just nestles in a little closer, determined to use your shoulder as a pillow. 

“Why don’t we go home?” You say, rubbing her back, “My parents will be out, they’ll never know we skipped.”

“No.” Tara says, sleepy voice roused suddenly, “Us home alone in the middle of the day? That’s the perfect time for Ghostface to attack.” 

“It is.” Mindy agrees, scooting into the spot next to Chad, “Although, I wouldn’t get too comfortable here, either.” She gestures behind her, “Ghostface attacked Sidney Prescott in the middle of the day in that bathroom like twenty-something years ago.” 

You glare as Tara sits up, suddenly wide awake. 

“Can you not say things like that?” You hiss, “She’s already freaked out enough.” 

“She should be.” Mindy says, “And so should you. This isn’t the time to get comfortable. We need to figure out who Ghostface is and what they want with you.” 

“I know who it is,” Tara says, “It’s Richie, my sister’s freak of a boyfriend.” 

“We don’t know that,” You say. You glare at Mindy, a little. Now she’d set Tara off there was no hearing the end of it. 

Mindy ignores you, her interest piqued. 

“Tell me more about him.” 

“He’s a deadbeat,” Tara says, a little too enthusiastically, “Went to college but he works at a bowling alley. Plays video-games all day in his tighty-whities.”

Mindy scrunches her nose, “A little too much information, Tara.” 

“None of this started until he moved in with us,” Tara insists. 

“What about motive?” Mindy asks, eyebrows scrunched like she’s trying to solve a particularly difficult math problem. 

“I’ve not exactly been the most… welcoming host,” Tara says with a shrug, “Maybe he’s got thin skin.” 

This is a pointless exercise. You know the motive, and so does Tara. Mindy is quite literally taking a stab in the dark. You touch Tara’s face, just under her tired eyes. 

“We’ll call the Sheriff after school. See if Richie’s story about driving to the restaurant is true,” You say, hoping it’ll be enough to satiate her, “But can we not rule out other people? It could be anyone, babe.” 

“She’s right,” Mindy says, taking a bite of her salad, “It could be anyone. That’s the only rule in Woodsboro.” 

Tara purses her lips, but she doesn’t argue. Leaning back into you, like she’s just remembered her fatigue. You press your lips to her forehead. 

“If you won’t come home, let’s go to the library.” You press, rubbing the back of her neck, “There’s always tons of people there. You can nap and I’ll keep watch.” 

“We’ll come too,” Chad pipes up, his mouth half full of pizza, “I hate Chemistry anyway. Besides, we’re a team right? That masked coward isn’t taking anymore of us.” 

Mindy and Liv nod in agreement.

It’s an odd sort of setup but it works. 

The librarian isn’t paid enough to care that the five of you should be in class, so you scoot right past her to a small breakout area near the back of the library. 

You take the couch, let Tara stretch out and lay her head in your lap. Chad and Liv sit opposite, Mindy on an armchair, back against the wall so she can keep watch. Tara only agrees to sleep after making the four of you swear black and blue you’ll wake her at the first sign of trouble.

You hand curls around the taser in your pocket, ready to whip it out at any sudden movement. Tara, seemingly secure, falls asleep within minutes. She’s so sweet when she’s sleeping, fingers curled tight around your hand, eyes fluttered shut, her mouth slightly open. You brush her hair out of her eyes, rub her cheek soothingly. 

Liv watches you, catches your eye as you look over at her. 

“I’ve been thinking,” She says, a little slowly, like she’s trying to be careful with her words, “Ghostface is going to keep coming after you, right? He doesn’t often let a victim escape.” 

You stare. 

“Yeah. Thanks for reminding me, Liv.” 

“No,” She shakes her head, like you’re misunderstanding, “What I mean is, we don’t know who he is. And if he’s going to keep coming for you anyway - maybe there’s something we can do to stop him. Unmask him.” 

“You want to trap him?” You ask, chewing your lip. 

Liv nods, enthusiastically. She looks to Chad for his backup. He looks a little hesitant.  

“I don’t know Liv..” 

“Babe. Come on.” Liv insists. She tugs at his hand, “They’re our friends, we can’t just let Ghostface come for them.” 

“We’re not.” Chad says, gesturing around, “Why do you think we’re all in the library watching Tara sleep? For fun?” He raises his voice a little too high. You shush him, press your hand against Tara’s head, trying to muffle the sounds of their voices. She doesn’t move, still deep in her much-needed sleep. 

“It’s not a bad idea,” Mindy says, slowly, “I mean, the biggest advantage he has is that you don’t know who he is. If we can identify him, it’s all over.” 

Liv nods, enthusiastically. 

“We could lure him into a trap. Unmask him. And then you’ll both be safe.” 

You bite your lip. It sounds risky, sure, but no riskier than your situation already is. Liv’s right: Ghostface isn’t likely to stop coming after you. 

“We’ll see what Tara thinks when she wakes up.” You say, rub her back, ever so slightly. 

A little while goes by. Chad and Liv hold hands, quietly chat. Mindy watches the door. You watch Tara, content with the steady sounds of her breathing. 

And then that second coffee you’d had in the morning comes around for payback. 

You look around the library, biting your lip. The last thing you want to do is leave Tara. But you don’t want to wake her either. You’ll leave her with Chad and Mindy, take Liv for security. You’re in the process of trying to shuffle Tara’s head off your lap without waking her when a voice stops you. 

“Don’t even think about it,” Mindy says, not looking up from her phone. 

“Huh?” You say

Mindy shoots you a look. 

“You’re thinking about going off somewhere by yourself. To get food, or to pee. Don’t even think about it.” 

“I wasn’t going to go alone,” You assure, your back up a little, “I was going to ask Liv to come with me.” 

Mindy snorts. 

“My point exactly. And what sort of help do you suppose Liv is going to give you if Ghostface attacks? Other than being a meat shield?”

“Hey!” Liv pipes up. Mindy ignores her. 

“Fine,” You say, “You come with me then.” You press your hand to Tara’s head, “Please. She needs to sleep, I don’t want to wake her.” 

“Absolutely not,” Mindy says, her attention back on her phone, “No offense, but I don’t want to be responsible for you. I’d rather fight Ghostface himself than Tara if something were to go wrong. Besides-” 

She sits up, eyes glinting, “How do you know I’m not Ghostface?” 

“Because if you were Ghostface you would have agreed to go with her,” Tara says, voice groggy as she stirs in your lap. 

You shoot Mindy a look, try to press Tara back down into your lap. 

“Baby,” You soothe her, “It’s okay, go back to sleep.”

She stirs, sitting up in your lap, a yawn on her lips, “It’s fine, I’m up now. Where do you want to go?” 

-

The five of you leave the Library together, reconvening in the girls bathroom. You feel like you’re the President or something, four bodyguards by your side, marching you down the hallways, ready to take on anyone who crosses paths with you. 

Chad and Mindy agree to keep watch outside the door while Tara and Liv accompany you into the bathroom. 

Liv immediately finds the mirror, desperate to apply her lipstick of all things. You could make a snide comment about her gussying herself up for Ghostface but you need to pee far too bad to bother. Tara hovers at the cubicle stall, her hand pressed against the door. 

“You okay, babe?” She asks, for the fourth time since you’d sat down, “I don’t hear anything.” 

You didn’t anticipate how difficult it would be to go under these conditions. Half of you wishes she’d waited outside. 

“I’m fine, Tara,” You assure, “Can you back up a bit? I don’t want you to hear me pee.” 

“Oh, I totally get that,” You hear Liv’s voice from the mirror, “There’s nothing romantic about hearing your significant other pee. I don’t even let Chad fart in front of me. If he needs to, he has to go outside.” 

Tara huffs. You squint your eyes, trying to force it. Leaving Liv and Tara in an enclosed space is suddenly less appealing than Tara hearing you pee.  

“I’ll run the facet, babe.” Tara says, stepping away. 

Then, you hear the door open, hear Mindy’s voice. 

“What’s taking so long in here?” She asks, “We’re skipping classes, remember? Not a great look if a teacher catches us roaming the halls.” 

“Since when do you care about not being in class?” Tara asks. 

The door opens again. 

“Chad, this is the girls bathroom.” Liv says, sounding scandalized, “Get out.” 

“No way. I’m not standing out there by myself,” Chad says. He shuts the door behind him, “There’s a psycho running around.”

He pauses. 

“What’s taking so long? Is she pooping?”

“Okay, everybody out.” You declare, loudly, “I can’t pee if you’re all here.” 

They grumble, but file out one by one. Tara doesn't move, you can see her sneakers under the stall door. 

“Babe, you too.” 

She doesn’t want to, you can tell by the way she hesitates. 

“Babe. Please.” 

She relents. 

“All right,” She says, “I’ll be right outside. Use your whistle if you need anything. I’ll be back in a minute.” 

You hear the door close behind her and sigh with relief. 

-

You don’t get attacked mid-pee, perhaps the greatest victory of the day. 

You spend the rest of the afternoon holed up in the library with Tara and her friends, waiting for an attack that never comes. You swear Mindy is a little disappointed when she drives off with Chad and Liv in tow, promising the five of you would come up with a game plan for the Ghostface trap tomorrow in school. 

When you and Tara get home, she’s still a little on edge. 

“Let’s have an early night,” You suggest after your shower, curling her hand around yours as you lead her to your bedroom, “You need to get some sleep.”

But she doesn’t fall asleep, even after promising she would. 

She tosses and turns in your arms, sitting up abruptly at any sudden noise. Her heartbeat wild, erratic. She’s unsettled. She’s scared. Even with the handgun at your side. 

“Baby,” You groan as she sits up again suddenly, leaning over you to double check the gun is loaded, “Please. You need to sleep.” 

“I’m trying,” She says, “I hate this. I feel like he’s going to burst through the window at any moment and if I’m asleep-”

“I’ll be awake,” You finish, pull her back down into you, “And I’ll wake you straight away. Like I promised.” 

“What if you fall asleep?” She asks, chewing her lip. 

“I won’t babe, I promise.” You say. You rub her bare thighs, try to calm her down. 

“You need to relax.” 

You kiss her softly, a thought occurring at the way her hands grip tight on your t-shirt. You tug her a little closer, dip down to squeeze her ass. 

“And I think I know something that will calm you down.” 

She murmurs something inaudible as you lean down to kiss her neck, tightening your grip on her hips. It works like a charm. You feel her physically relax against you, threading her fingers through your hair as you trail your lips over her collarbone. 

You swipe your tongue across her neck, tease her gently with your lips and tongue until she’s sighing, grinding her hips into yours. It isn’t hard to pry her out of her nightshirt, underwear soon to follow. She’s equally concerned with getting you naked, the thrill that shoots through you at her naked body on yours never getting old. 

Then she’s pulling away, a dangerous look in her eyes. 

“You know what would relax me?” She says, eyes sparkling, “If you let me do that thing I’ve been wanting to do.” 

That thing involves Tara sticking her strap-on somewhere it definitely didn’t belong. Your stomach flips at the thought. 

“Nice try.” You say, press a kiss to her lips, “You know the deal. You can do it to me if I can do it to you. You first.” 

She pouts, cups your sex with her hand. 

“Not even a finger?” She says, voice coy. 

You shake your head. 

“What about my tongue?”

You consider it. 

It turns you on, the fact that she wants it so badly. You’ll let her have it eventually, you’d let her do almost anything to you. But you want her to earn it. You want to make it all the more special when she finally gets it. 

“Tongue is fine. Outside only.” 

She leans down and kisses you, eyes filling with excitement. 

“Yes, Ma’am.” She murmurs before she’s slipping down your body to pull your thighs over her shoulders, looking like a kid in a candy store. 

Her lips are hot against your inner thighs, hands gripping around your thighs as she pulls you closer to her. She works you up just right, nipping and licking and sucking at your thighs, pressing warm kisses to the inside of your knees. You moan under her as her lips find your folds, lapping leisurely at the syrup that is the fruits of her labor. 

“Baby,” You groan as she diverts back to your thighs, “Don’t tease.” 

She’s a sucker for you, you know by the way she relents within moments. Her tongue runs over your clit gently, then down to lap at your entrance. You gasp. Her fingers tighten around your thighs as she moves back up and takes your clit between her lips, sucking hard. 

You writhe underneath her, embarrassingly close to cumming before she’s trailing her lips down, disappointment flooding through you as she releases your clit. 

And then you feel her tongue there. 

You can help the low groan that slips out of your mouth. 

It feels dirty, taboo. Exciting. 

It feels different.

She trails her tongue around the rim, then she’s lapping at your asshole like there’s no tomorrow. Her fingers slip inside your pussy, she curls her fingers upwards creating the strangest and most pleasant sensation. 

You sigh, grip your own breasts in your hands as she works her magic, tilting just to the edge - so close. 

And then stops. 

You almost cry out of frustration. 

She kisses her way back up your stomach to your mouth, slipping her fingers out. They’re sticky, warm against your hips as she squeezes you. 

And then you feel her drop them down lower. Fingertips skirting gently against your asshole. 

The look in her eyes is animalistic. 

“Let me put them in,” She almost begs, her voice desperate, needy, “Please baby, I want your ass so bad. I just want to be inside you.” 

You reach down for her hand, redirect her fingers and slip them knuckle deep inside your pussy. 

“There,” You say, cheeky smile on your face, “Now you’re inside me.”

“I hate you,” She mumbles, but kisses you all the same, curls her fingers only slightly. You gasp, tilt your hips up to meet her fingers. 

It only takes a few hard thrusts before you’re groaning, tightening around her fingers. Eyes closed, body thrumming as your orgasm overtakes you. She kisses you through it, holds you tight as you come down. 

When your heartbeat has slowed, she’s still pressing kisses to your chest. You feel her against your thigh, sticky and wet. Desire floods through you once again. 

“Come up here,” You murmur, tilting her hips up to you. 

She gets the message quickly, skirts up your body until her thighs are either side of your head. You grip her hips, pull her down to meet your mouth. She’s wet, so wet, you don’t even need to tease her. 

You wrap your hands around her thighs, wanting to be encompassed by her. Lips finding her wet heat immediately. You lick her folds once, clean her up a little before trailing your tongue to her entrance, letting her tight pussy encompass your tongue. She rides you a little, before you lick your way up to her clit and lovingly work her into an orgasm. 

Her smell, her taste is perfect. You could do this forever. Have her sit upon your face and make her moan and gasp the way she is right now. She’s given up all pretense of trying to hold herself upright, her full weight atop you. Your fingernails dig into the milky skin of her thighs, trying to keep her in place as you suck her. In only minutes, she’s groaning, rewarding your efforts with an orgasm and a fresh wave of cum drizzling into your open mouth. 

You’re a little disappointed when she climbs off you, slumping down to curl into your body. Sweat on her forehead, sticky, keeping her dark hair welded to it. You kiss her head. Murmur that you love her against her sticky skin. 

And then silence falls over the two of you, just enjoying each other’s post-coital company. All thought of Ghostface gone, just you and her, the way it should be. 

And then her phone starts to buzz. 

She reaches out, silences it. Presses her lips to your mouth, a little sleepy. 

“You think you’ll be able to sleep?” You ask, pressing another kiss to her forehead. She’s a little limp in your arms. You’ve worn her out. 

“I think so.” She says. She closes her eyes, rests her head against your shoulder. 

“Who is that?” You ask as her phone buzzes again. 

She reaches out for it, Sam’s name across the screen. 

She rejects the call, puts the phone back to the nightstand. 

“Babe,” You chide, “It could be important.” 

“It’s her telling me I need to come home,” Tara says, “She’s been calling all day.” 

“Answer it.” You kiss her, reach for her phone and drop it back into your hands, “I’m going to the bathroom.” 

“I’ll come with you.” She says, immediately, but you shake your head, reaching out for your shirt and pulling it over your head. 

“You know I can’t go when you’re there.” You say, kiss her once before you’re climbing off the bed.

“Take your whistle.” She says, and you roll your eyes, tugging it around your neck. You show it to her. 

“There. Got the whistle. Happy?”

“Ecstatic.” She says, deadpanned as she lifts her phone to her ear, “Don’t be long or I’m going to come looking for you.” 

You slip out of the bedroom, trail down the dark hall to the bathroom. Your Dad is asleep, you can hear his snoring through the walls. You flip on the bathroom light.

And then you feel it. Something’s wrong. It comes over you all at once. The hallway is empty - you checked - and you don’t hear anything. Nothing out of the ordinary. But you feel it. It seizes through your chest, instinctual. You raise your hands to the whistle, grip it between your fingertips, ready to blow it. Your heartbeat hammers. You tilt your head, all your senses coming alive. Trying to figure out if something is truly wrong or if you’re just imagining it. 

You don’t like it. You leave the bathroom, scurry back down the hallway to your bedroom. To your safety. To Tara. 

And then just as you’re about to press your hand to the doorknob, strong around grip around you, pulling you close. A hand over your mouth. The figure tugs you back down the hallway.  

You cry out, eyes wide, but the hand over your lips muffles the sound. Your Dad’s snoring doesn’t relent. 

“Stop struggling.” 

You recognize the voice immediately. It’s Richie. His breath is hot against your ear, sour, laced with booze. You cry out again, eyes bulging. Desperate for Tara, your Dad, your mom, anyone. But no one hears a sound. His grip on you is too tight. 

“I’m not going to hurt you. We’re going downstairs. Outside. So we can talk.” He drags you like you're a ragdoll. Rough. Impatient. Tears flood down your cheeks. You struggle hard against him but it’s no use. He’s too strong. 

“Stop it,” He hisses, arms strong, keeping you in place, “We can’t talk like this. We can’t talk if you scream.”

Next part

[basilone]

For every bit of writing that makes it onto this blog, there's also writing that doesn't. I recently realized that I've never shared a piece that's purely Lottie/Darlene, even though I'd already written a good chunk of it. I spent some time completing it, because y'all have been too sweet about them both and I'd love to share the start of their relationship with you. This is Lottie/Darlene stateside, pre-England, figuring themselves out as they go along. Warnings apply for their talk about homophobia, sex, and their not-so-great home lives. They also get a little smutty about it (it's Lottie/Darlene, of course they do), so that's why there's a content warning. 😉I hope you'll enjoy it!

“Lot?”

“Yeah?”

“You goin’ home soon?”

Lottie blinks up at the ceiling. Sometimes, she forgets who she’s told. Who’s been made privy to her life like that – thrown out of the house, working odd jobs she’s not suited for – and who she’s not managed to tell anything about it just yet. She’s mentioned it at flight training. Shrugged it off like water gliding off a duck, because some of the girls were feeling mighty stressed about whatever the hell their families were gonna say about joining up with the army. She’s certainly mentioned it to the fellas she’s flying with most, though she hasn’t said why.

“Nawh,” she says, now, rolling her head as well as her eyes. “Nobody’s gonna want me there.” She tries to smile. Feels it strain at her mouth, worn too thin and brittle, before it’s safe to exhale a small sigh. “Why’d you ask?”

“Them society pages said your family’s got some anniversary type o’ thing going on? Least, that’s what Christina Heartfield was sayin’. She keeps up on that sorta information like it’s gonna win the war or somethin’.” Darlene’s slight scoff tells Lottie exactly what she makes of that. “Thought ya might, I dunno, head back home.” The bed dips slightly under Darlene’s weight as she shifts atop it, restless like she’s been the past few nights. “Whatchu mean, nobody’s gonna want ya there?”

“Tiny needs to keep her gossip mouth shut.” Lottie doesn’t put a lick of venom behind the words. As far as gossips go, Heartfield won’t hold a candle to her mother. “And I mean that they won’t open the damn door for me, probably. Or they’ll open it up but I’ll be spendin’ every moment of that party with half the family watching me like a damn hawk and peckin’ at all my mistakes.” She lets out a long-suffering sigh. Chances a glance at Darlene, who’s turned toward her and is studying her a little too closely. “Don’t look at me like that, Dar.”

“Like what?”

“Like that,” she says, turning onto her side and raising an eyebrow at her. “Like you’re feeling sorry for me or some shit. It’s fine. I don’t wanna go home, all right?”

“Sure. Don’t mean it don’t sting.” Darlene’s half-shrug slips the band of her nightgown off her shoulders. She doesn’t bother putting it back – Lottie’s not even sure she felt it – but peers at Lottie with all the might of someone who’s trying to decipher something instead. “It’s different when you got a choice,” muses Darlene out loud, voice hushed in the quiet of a too-warm bedroom. “When ya can just decide whether you wanna go back or not. Like the rest of them girls do. But when it’s you and me, we don’t get choice. We just get told to please not come back.”

Lottie feels her mouth go dry. “Dar…”

“I left when I was six months shy of turnin’ eighteen. Woulda waited, except my mama’s new boyfriend was a piece o’ junk that deserved a beatin’”– and Darlene’s matter-of-fact tone tells Lottie exactly who delivered on that –“and I got caught with my head under Janie Charles’s skirt around that same time. Didn’t feel like stickin’ around for that sermon any. Pastor damn near got himself a heart attack when he caught us in the back o’ the church.”

“Darlene,” says Lottie, because the words head and Janie and skirt and caught don’t make full sense, “what’re you sayin’?” She studies the little red curls plastered to Darlene’s freckled brow. Easier than looking into her eyes and seeing herself staring back. “You… uh.”

“Made Janie Charles cry out for Jesus in a church pew with my tongue between her thighs?”

“Jesus,” says Lottie, before she can stop herself, “that’s worse than me getting caught with my hand up Rosalie Devereaux’s skirt at my family’s Christmas brunch while she was kissing my neck.”

“I don’t know,” says Darlene, seemingly not caring about the furious blush that’s working its way into Lottie’s cheeks or the brewing fear that melts heavy on Lottie’s tongue the longer Darlene keeps talking, “seems to me like your family cares more about what’s proper than mine. All my mama said to me was Jesus Christ, Darlene, at least we know you ain’t gonna starve earning your living on your back. I’d already gotten an earful for givin’ one of them Lawson boys a hand in the back o’ his truck about a week or two before the Janie thing happened, see?” The laugh that escapes Darlene is throaty, twisted with the same sort of grim amusement that’s been coiling in Lottie’s belly for months now. “When I said she was one to talk, gettin’ five different kids outta four different fellas the way she did, that was that. Can’t stay in a place like that no more.”

“My mother said I was unnatural.” Lottie blinks at the memory. “Rosalie, bless her dumb little heart, said it was all my idea. That she couldn’t stop me from…” Her fist still balls around the bedsheets at the accusation. “She wanted it, Dar, I wouldn’t just’ve…” Wouldn’t have forced a goddamn thing, she almost says, except even the thought of saying it fills her throat with bile. “She got away with Bible study and a stay at a cousin’s summer home. Me? Couldn’t even ask for my mother to pass the salt without her cryin’ into her plate about the vile creature she gave birth to.”

“All your idea to have her lips on your neck and her hand probably already working to get to touch your tits, huh,” says Darlene, folding her own hand around Lottie’s fist so decisively that Lottie releases the bedsheets in a hurry. “Not your fault she feels ashamed of who she is, Lot, all right? Ain’t a goddamn thing wrong about ya. I’m gonna fight your mama any day ya want me to, ya hear me?” Darlene’s fingers squeeze down tight. Lottie still can’t look at her fully. Studies the little freckle near the corner of Darlene’s lower lip instead. “Sorry I brought it up. ’Course ya ain’t goin’ home. You gonna stay with me, have some fun.”

“Fun, huh?”

“Sure thing, sugar.” The little freckle moves with Darlene’s brilliant smile. “This Rosalie, she the only one or just the only one ya got caught with?”

“I, uh,” says Lottie, “might’ve gotten tangled up with Henry Dorrance-Jones a few times. And Feline Montparssat is a real good kisser,” she mumbles, “and, uh, Barbara from daddy’s accounting firm? Kind of?”

“Kind of?”

“She, uh, slipped her fingers into my panties?” Lottie hates that she makes it sound like a question. “I didn’t do anything to her except some kissin’, she said she didn’t want more trouble. But she… uh. It felt really nice?”

“Yeah?” Darlene’s grin broadens to the point where Lottie can’t help but look at her. Her dark eyes sparkle with good humor, corners of her eyes crinkling into a fond smile, and the freckles that dot her nose move up into the little scrunch of amusement Lottie knows all too well. “Of course that feels nice, Lot, Jesus,” cackles Darlene, then, squeezing her hand again. “Glad to know I ain’t the only one making eyes at girls and fellas alike.”

“You’re the only one actin’ normal about it, though.” The only one who hasn’t made me feel like there’s something wrong with that. “Everybody else has… I don’t know.” She can’t really meet Darlene’s eyes any, now. Can’t do more than shrug and pull her hand out of Darlene’s grasp. “All them girls made it feel like a game. Barbara said I was a sweet little thing. Was practically cooin’ about it while she tried and mostly failed to get me off. And Feline’s always kissed just about anybody.”

“And Rosalie was fine doin’ anything as long as she wouldn’t get caught,” continues Darlene, “and we all know Henry’s got more notches in his bedposts than… Aw, shoot, Lot, I didn’t mean… Hey now…”

“Yeah, well,” sniffles Lottie, wiping at her cheeks with the back of her hand, “one of them notches is my virginity, and he was an ass about it, and I still let him because at least then that’d be out of the damn way.” She tries to smile at Darlene. Is sure it comes off awfully shaky and watery, if the feeling of her trembling lip is anything to go by. “And then I c-continued to let him, and p-p-probably racked my total notches up to a handful, b-because… b-b-because…”

“Because at least Henry’s not a girl. And if you’ve got a cock inside ya, and ya like the feelin’, then maybe you ain’t interested in girls after all. And if he fucks ya just right, and you get off on it, at least you won’t be thinkin’ about what it’d feel like to have a girl’s fingers inside o’ ya while her mouth’s on yours.”

Lottie sobers up so abruptly she feels like she’s been doused with cold water. “Dar…”

Darlene’s own smile is brittle. Fleeting. “It don’t work like that, Lot. I tried real hard to make it work and I know it don’t. Highlight of my year was getting fucked by some fella I never even learned the name of and all I thought about while he was doin’ it was how it’d feel to press my mouth between the legs of the pretty girl I’d seen at the dance earlier that night. I clenched around his cock thinkin’ about buryin’ my tongue inside her sweet drippin’ cunt and he was bragging summat fierce about makin’ me do that at first.”

“At first?”

“Well, I told him real quick that I can do that sorta thing whenever I like,” grins Darlene, eyes sparkling, “just to make a fella I’m bored with finish faster. He didn’t like that. Wanted to black my eye about it, so I kicked him in the balls until he started to cry and then took off runnin’.”

“Jesus, Dar,” snickers Lottie, trying to ignore the squirmy feeling deep inside her own belly. “Sounds like we both got shit taste in fellas, at least.”

“At least my taste in girls is good.”

“Is it? Pretty sure mine ain’t.” Lottie rolls her eyes for emphasis. “Or maybe I just need to be with a girl who doesn’t think it’s some game,” she adds, belated, trying not to stare too hard at the freckles that dot Darlene’s nose. “But I wouldn’t know how to recognize that kinda girl.”

“Wouldn’t ya?”

“No?”

“Not even if one’s, I dunno, currently starin’ at ya and tryin’ to figure out the best way to plant a kiss on ya?”

Lottie can practically feel the weight of the question linger in the space between them. Sure, Darlene said it with a smile. Said it like it doesn’t have to mean something more than it does. Like it’s just a little thing she’s offering. But she’s also implied it’s not a game. That this is something that could be… Could just be real.

And it’s not like she hasn’t thought about it any. Sharing a room with Darlene almost demands that she thinks about it plenty. Thinks about it when she’s brushing her teeth while Darlene’s doing her hair. Thinks about it when Darlene’s applying balm to her feet, when Darlene’s giggling over something she read in a magazine, when Darlene’s eating peaches with cream out of a bowl. Thinks about it while she’s getting ready for bed and sees Darlene all sprawled out on the bed beside hers. Thinks about it while she’s in the shower, while she’s out dancing, while she’s… she’s…

Oh.

Darlene’s mouth is soft. So gentle against her own, sweet about it in a way that aches, unhurried like Darlene always seems to be. She’s just there with her, hand warm against Lottie’s cheek, breath fanning out over Lottie’s lips, lips tasting more like sugar than the candy Lottie’s been eating. Pressing into Lottie’s space more decisively when she doesn’t say no.

The rush of her heartbeat pulses in her ears when she kisses Darlene back.

Her breath shudders between them a moment before Darlene’s mouth crashes onto hers wholly. Before Darlene’s tongue swirls around the tip of her own tongue, daring, challenging, and Lottie can’t help but lick her way into Darlene’s mouth just to savor her, to taste her, to get close to her. Her hand’s on Darlene’s cheek and it feels like she’s smiling the same way Lottie’s smiling, mouth quirking up between kisses, breath going just a little ragged for it.

Darlene’s tone is more moan than speech. “Lot…”

She wants to hear that again. Wants to hear Darlene say her name again – moan her name again – and so she chases the sound. Chases it right into Darlene’s mouth, pliant and warm and so goddamn soft, until her tongue slips against Darlene’s and Darlene’s hands fly into her hair in response. She can’t stop kissing her now that Darlene holds her between two hands, fingers wandering, pulling her closer still. Darlene’s all noise about it – little pants and exhales, small whimpers Lottie can’t help but capture – and she’s moving closer, toppling against her, leg and arm and all the rest of her fanning out over Lottie’s body without a care.

“Fuck.” She exhales. Makes it sound like a punctuation mark against Darlene’s throat before kissing her there too. “Dar… Dar, please…” She hardly knows why she’s begging. Doesn’t really realize that she is until Darlene’s mouth nips at her earlobe and Darlene’s breath lodges warm against her ear. “Darlene…”

“You doin’ okay there, pretty girl?”

Lottie nods, breathless, when Darlene pulls back to look at her. Her red hair is a halo in this light, springy with unruly curls, and her freckles move as she scrunches her nose up and grins down at Lottie. Lottie’s never been anyone’s pretty girl before. Hasn’t been complimented like this, so genuine that it makes her head spin a little, so sweetly that it almost makes tears spring into her eyes.

“Maybe,” she says, a little breathless about it, feeling strangely weightless about it, “my taste in girls ain’t that bad after all.”

“Yeah?” Darlene’s giggle lights up the room in such a way that it makes all of Lottie’s hair stand on end. “Got a taste for me?” she teases, voice lower and more like velvet than Darlene’s got any fucking right to sound. She fixes Lottie with her best stare, challenging but seemingly amused all at once. “Do ya really?”

“Fuck, you don’t even…” Lottie groans. Wedges her knee between Darlene’s legs just because she can, just because it makes Darlene fall against her more and makes her make that little noise of pleasure again. Darlene’s all press of curves at her hips, nightgown hiked up her thighs so high that it makes Lottie’s throat go dry, and Lottie clenches her hands uselessly to stop her hands from wandering over her bare skin. “I really wanna taste you, Dar,” she admits, heat unfurling in her whole body, “wanna touch you and kiss you and…”

Darlene rakes her hair back. The band of her nightgown loosens with the motion, showing the soft swell of small breasts beneath the fabric, revealing more freckles that Lottie needs to trace with her mouth if Darlene will let her. “And lemme kiss ya too?” asks Darlene, blush peppering her freckles and turning them redder still. “Yeah?” she checks, smiling, to Lottie’s vigorous nods. “C’mere, honey, let’s get a proper taste of ya…”

A proper taste, Lottie finds, is Darlene’s hands in her hair – pulling and cajoling – and Darlene’s mouth and tongue roaming everywhere over her face and her neck and her shoulders – licking, nipping, suckling, kissing, kissing, kissing – and Darlene pressing against her, leaning in, smelling like peaches and cream and the sweetest thing Lottie’s ever had. A proper taste, she finds, is kissing Darlene back and letting her kisses trail over Darlene’s collarbone until she shivers. A proper taste is interlocking their hands and letting her other hand roam over Darlene’s bare leg, her side, her hair, her smiling face, kissing her all the while.

A proper taste also is Darlene’s nightgown losing the fight for propriety and Lottie solving that by simply covering her with her mouth. She doesn’t think twice about it. Doesn’t think Darlene minds, not with the mewl that escapes her when Lottie’s mouth locks around her nipple. And that makes her want more, makes her bold. Makes her slip the other band off Darlene’s shoulder just so she can kiss a path from one breast to another and make Darlene noisier about it. Makes her nudge her thigh up between Darlene’s legs until she feels that wet press of heat, until all she can think about is what it’d be like to get a taste of Darlene there, until Darlene pants out something between a laugh and a cry about it.

“You’re right,” says Lottie, smug as anything, feeling like she’s gonna fly and crash all at once the same way she does when she glides a plane home, “this is the kinda fun we should be havin’.”

“I’m a terrible influence, ya know,” snickers Darlene, eyes sparkling with mirth. “Look at ya, Lot, kissin’ a girl all improper”– she’s teasing, pinching Lottie’s side as she does –“makin’ a girl wanna eat you up like that, lookin’ like ya do…”

Lottie’s decision is lightning-quick, as though she’s taking a shot in clear blue skies. “I ain’t stoppin’ you.”

“No taking it slow with ya, huh?”

“Dar,” she says, brushing Darlene’s stray curl away from her cheek, “I’ve been thinking about this since the day we met and I thought oh sweet baby Jesus I wanna kiss that girl…”

“If it helps at all,” says Darlene, grinning, “I thought oh good Lord, they put me with the really hot girl, how am I gon’ survive this without makin’ a fool of myself?”

Lottie snorts out a laugh at that. “We’re both fools. Should’ve just made out about this weeks ago.”

“Wanna make it up for it now?”

She nods up at Darlene, breathless, wanting more than she’s ever wanted anything in her whole life. And Darlene, sweet as anything, merely smiles and wordlessly issues the challenge that has always landed Lottie in trouble before: the hell you waitin’ for?

Lottie’s never been the type of girl who needs to be asked this twice.

[newtonsheffield]

Could we see some jealous Kate in Mile High?

Maybe Siena ends up in their flight once Kate and Anthony are officially together???

Ohhh For a relationship that started off on the grounds of no jealousy: They’re both pretty jealous people.

And Kate really thought she got over it after she and Anthony actually put their cards on the table and said they didn’t want to see other people.

“Okay!”

Kate turned at the sound of her sister bursting through the cockpit door. “Edwina, we’re a little busy.” She gestured to the controls, “You know, preparing to fly the plane.”

Edwina rolled her eyes, “I just… I don’t want you to overreact to this but Siena Rosso is on this flight.”

Kate’s stomach dropped, something prickling down her spine at the thought of Anthony’s ex girlfriend, the only other person he’d been in a committed relationship with. Even if it hadn’t worked out, they’d loved one another once. Were still friends, really. She couldn’t say she wasn’t at least curious about her, what she looked like, how she was, how she and Anthony had been together.

“Right well…” Kate trailed off, “Get out of the way!” Kate hissed, peering round the cockpit door, “Which one is she?”

“Is anyone going to tell me who Siena Rosso is?” Sophie said curiously, joining her and Edwina at peering round the door.

“She’s Anthony’s ex.” Edwina supplied, “They used to hook up until Kate and Anthony got together.”

“Which one is she?” Kate hummed, her stomach churning, but she didn’t need to ask. Not really.

Anthony was stood a few rows down, at the back of first class, laughing at something a woman had said. She was beautiful, her dark hair tossed up effortlessly as she leaned in and said something conspiratorially to Anthony who turned pointing towards the cockpit.

“Fuck.”

Kate slammed the door shut before anyone could notice them peering out the door, trying to quiet the doubtful voice in her head.

You’re such opposites, he’ll never stay with you.

“Well, I wish she wasn’t so pretty.”

“Oh come on,” Sophie tutted, “Anthony loves you.”

“You don’t have anything to worry about.” Edwina agreed.

Kate shook her head, taking a shuddering breath, “It doesn’t matter. It literally doesn’t, we have to work.”

She sat back down and tried to focus on what she had to do. Even so she cleared her throat when she flicked on the intercom. “Good morning Everyone! Captain Kate Sharma from the flight deck, First Officer Sophie Beckett here with me and Welcome Aboard your British Airways flight to Singapore. We’ve an excellent crew on board with you today, at your beck and call for anything you might need. Some of you, not all of you. Anyway, they’re headed up by my loving boyfriend Anthony. It’s true, we’re in a very committed relationship, I’m actually thinking of suggesting that we move in together. Well, I’ve said that now. I’ll be back later to give you another update. Not on whether or not he said yes, just… on the… flight.”

Kate pinched the bridge of her nose as she turned off the intercom, She groaned as Sophie let out a low whistle. “Don’t.”

“Kate,” Sophie guffawed, “That was a train wreck, babe.”

“I know! Don’t you think I know that?! Now not only do I have to look at Anthony’s hot singer ex girlfriend; He’s going to reject me! Right in front of her probably! And then they’ll skip off into the sunset together!”

“Are we spiralling a little?”

“No!”

“So… that was insane.” Edwina hummed pushing the dinner cart in.

“Oh God!” Kate groaned, “Does he not want to even come in here and face me?!”

“He was held up.” Edwina tutted, “Congrats on… moving in together though? Are you getting a cat as well?”

“Anthony and I would clearly be dog people.”

Her anxiety still hadn’t abated at the end of the flight, jealousy and anxiety taking their turns, warring away in her chest. Right up until she opened the cockpit door. And there was Siena Rosso, nudging Anthony’s shoulder gently. Her eyes widened when she took in Kate,

“There’s your girl.”

Anthony turned, looking a little dazed and Kate didn’t know what came over her. She reached forward, grabbing Anthony by the lapels of his jacket and crashed their lips together in a searing kiss.

Anthony looked dazed when she finally nudged him back, his hand in his hair, “Hey, Kate.” He cleared his throat, “Have you met Siena?”

Siena peered around them, “Hi, Kate, so lovely to meet you. Anthony’s told me so much about you.”

“Nice to meet you as well.”

Anthony tucked his arm around Kate’s waist before he cleared his throat, “Well, good luck with your show tonight. Chat soon hey? We’ll all go to dinner.”

“I’d like that.” Siena smiled, “Kate, hilarious announcement, 10/10.”

She winked over her shoulder at them and Kate suddenly felt ridiculous for it, with Anthony’s arm around her waist and his lips on her temple.

“Did you propose we move in together out of jealousy?” Anthony chuckled, but she could see the anxiety warring away behind his eyes.

“Yes, i did it in panic,” She straightened his tie, “But I actually do want us to move in together. So…? What d’you say? Ready to teach me how to do laundry?”

Anthony swallowed, “Yes, but I’m sorry, we need to move into my flat. Yours just…”

Kate scoffed, “Like I’m moving you into my place with all of your systems. I don’t have room.”

[robotstrategy]

Recalled • 57 - Quinceañera

Previous • Series Masterlist

Aight fair warning there might be some bad Spanish in here. (Cause I do not speak that language.)

Roland looks outside the front windows of the hall as he adjusts his shirt collar. He stands there like he’s waiting for someone, yet no one was told to come this early. He looks over to Sam, who stares at all the periwinkle-themed decorations. 

“You’re not back there with Nero?” He asks him. 

Sam shakes his head, he looks a little sad. “Nero hasn’t said it, but I think she just wants me to leave her alone.” 

“I see.” 

Roland takes another slow lap around the hall admiring all the decorations. The ombre draped curtains, the flowers, and the beautiful crown moulding on the hall’s walls. He walks into the back room, where his mother, his abuela and Nero are busy getting Lilian ready. Roland looks at his father who stands off to the side. “You’re not helping them?”

His father laughs. “They keep yelling at me whenever I try.” 

“Well, you don’t have the feminine touch we women have,” Nero responds.

“Sí, me gusta ella.” His abuela says it’s funny, she perfectly understands English but she can’t speak a lick of it.

Nero looks bewildered. “What did she say?” She asks Mr. Delgado. 

“She said she likes you chica.”

“Oh,” Nero reddened with shyness. 

Nero pins back Lilian’s hair with a bejewelled clip, she makes sure that the bottoms of her ears aren’t covered leaving room for the earrings her grandmother places in them. 

Nero turns to face Lilian. “So, any boyfriends?”

Lilian shakes her head solemnly. “All the boys that like me are weird, and all the boys I like think I look weird.”

“Hmmph, assholes.”

“But I do look weird.”

“Honey nooo…” Nero gets Cindy and Florencia to back away for a moment, she turns Lilian’s chair to one of the mirrors. “Look how pretty you are, you’ve got pretty blue eyes, beautiful long dark brown hair, and when you put on that gorgeous dress you’ll be the prettiest girl here.”

“But my eye, everyone will be talking about that.”

“Psssh, not with Sam and I here, what do you think they’ll be talking about, the Quinceañera’s lazy eye or the two Rewinds with Mason Starkey’s face?”

“I knew that face looked familiar!” Danilo interjected half-hazardly. 

“But-,” Lilian continued.

“Hey! If someone mocks your appearance I’ll spill punch on them or something, you're very beautiful, and I need you to see that.”

Lilian nods, and the girls get back to getting her ready. Once done, her mother helps her slip on her dress, and her abuela puts on her gloves and the rest of her jewelry.

“Oh, la dieciochoañera es una princesa tan hermosa!” Her abuela tells her.

“Can the princess give us a spin?” Nero asks Lilian.

Lilian twirls a few times, stopping once she gets dizzy, which is only two to three twirls. The girls cheer her on and Lilian seems to get really happy.

Half an hour later all the guests have arrived, Roland peeks out from the entrance curtains to see if he can spot Hayden. He sees him talking to a befuddled guy with a ponytail and tattoos covering his entire body, weird, who invited that guy?

His mother comes up to him and Roland opens the curtain for her, she heads down to the middle of the hall, getting everyone’s attention. 

“Hello everyone, please sit down, we'll be starting in one minute,” She turns around, walking back into the curtains as everyone gets seated. “How’s the speech going Lilian?”

Roland turns around to see Lilian speed-reading a piece of paper. “Good.” She says nervously, she lowers the paper from her view, frantically looking around for a table to put it on. 

Roland goes towards her. “Do you want me to hold on to it?”

“Why?”

He shrugs. “Could be good in case you forget a part.”

“And look like an idiot?”

“I’m not saying that,” He gestures at the page. “Hand it over, we don't have much time.” Lilian gives him the page and he neatly folds it and slides it into his coat pocket.

Their mother and father slip out of the curtains making it to the middle of the room. Lilian’s Quinceañera isn’t religious, so there won’t be any padrinos, which means her small Quinceañera court is next to go on, which consists of Roland, one of Lilian’s classmates, their abuela, and their tía. If Roland remembers correctly her name is Alejandra. “See you in like ten seconds.” He tells Lilian as he walks out. 

As Roland gets to the middle of the floor he sees Nero open the curtains wide for Lilian, the room is suddenly filled with murmurs of “Oh, she’s so beautiful.” and “Oh que linda.” Lilian turns her head down hiding a big smile as she walks towards the middle. Last to come out is her Chamberlain, it’s another guy from her class who is wheelchair-bound, Nero follows behind him, making sure he’s able to keep a steady pace as he rolls. Once he’s in the middle Nero hides herself in the court. 

The guests are instructed to stand up as Lilian is handed a microphone to begin her toast. 

“Hi everyone, thank you for coming,” She starts. “I’m really glad you all came, and I hope you enjoy this party. I never would’ve expected this to happen, and…” Roland starts to notice Lilian is hyperventilating, she starts to go into a cold sweat. “I hate this.” she spits out. Roland and their father rush to her side, Roland takes the microphone from Lilian and hands it to their father, he in turn exchanges it for his pocket-handkerchief. Roland blots away at Lilian’s sweat and tears. “What’s wrong?” He asks her.

“I forgot my lines.”

Roland pulls the paper out of his pocket and hands it to her. “I guess we were better safe than sorry.” 

“And I sound like a mouse.”

“Yeah, a pretty one.”

Lilian laughs. “I hate you.”

Lilian unfolds the paper as Roland hands her back the microphone. “Pretend you're just talking to me okay.” Lilian nods as she clears her throat. “I never would’ve expected this to happen, and I’m very thankful to my family for putting this together. This year I really wanted a dress for my birthday, and I guess I got the dress and a whole lot more. I’m also really happy that this year I was able to meet my real father. He’s really nice and ten times better than the father I had for most of my life. I know I’ve still got so much more to live, but I’m at least grateful that my eighteenth birthday is a happy one.” She nods to Roland, indicating her toast is over.

Roland hands over the microphone to his abuela and tía Alejandra. 

“Hola a todos, muchas gracias por venir.” His abuela starts.

“Hello everyone, thank you so much for coming.” His tía echoes in English.

“Estoy muy feliz de que todos hayan venido a la Quinceañera de mi nieta.”

“I am so happy you all came to my granddaughter’s Quinceañera.”

“Cuando era pequeña, las quinceañeras todavía se estaban integrando en la cultura española, así que fue realmente una sorpresa cuando tuve la oportunidad de tener una.”

“When I was little, Quinceañeras were still being integrated into Spaniard culture, so it was really a surprise when I got to have one myself.”

“Cuando mi hija tuvo su Quinceañera, me aseguré de que fuera la mejor fiesta de su vida, eso es exactamente lo que quería regalarle a mi nieta también.”

“When my daughter had her Quinceañera, I made sure it was the best party of her life, that’s exactly what I wanted to give my granddaughter as well.”

“Y continuaré asegurándome de que todas mis nietas tengan excelentes Quinceañeras.”

“And I will continue to make sure all my granddaughters have excellent Quinceañeras.”

“Ahora vamos a cenar.”

“Now, let’s have dinner.”

Lilian’s family is served first before the DJ calls out certain tables to head up to the buffet. While Roland is eating his abuela starts talking to him. “Rolando, ¿por qué no vinieron tus abuelos con nosotros?”

“Hmm, grandparents? No, my grandmother isn’t here, we made sure not to invite her.”

“Ah, pero ellos,” His abuela points over to Otto and Martha.

Roland shakes his head, laughing. “No, no, those are our neighbours, I do wish they were our grandparents though, they’re far nicer people.”

Roland excuses himself from the table to alleviate himself, once he gets out of the bathroom he sees the guy covered in tattoos leaning against the wall. Roland goes over to him. “Who are you?” He asks. 

“Hayden’s plus one,” Lev answers. “I’m surprised you don’t recognize me, almost…” Lev suddenly has a moment of realization. “Oh, you were unwound the entire time, sorry.” 

“It’s fine.”

Lev holds out his hand. “I’m Lev Tashi’ne, the clapper who didn’t clap.”

Roland nods his head absentmindedly.

“You still don’t know me.”

Roland shakes his head, affirming Lev’s suspicions. 

“I’m glad actually, unlike Hayden I don’t like being seen as a micro-celebrity,” He pauses. “Sorry for being here, Hayden had me thinking this was Connor-related, and now I’m here at some girl’s birthday party.”

“No, you’re not a burden,” Roland reassures him. “And, at least Hayden isn’t so alienated now.”

“Hah, guess he and I have that in common, we don’t know anyone here,” Lev’s face straightened. “Though I think I remember you from the graveyard.”

“You remember Roland, not me, I’m Modified.”

Lev nods. “When I went to Cleaver to become a clapper I had asked about Roland, he said Roland wasn’t the right material to be a clapper.”

Roland blinks. “Of course, I’m not a coward.”

Lev gives him a disgusted look. “A coward?! Roland clapping is self-immolation!”

Self-immolation, Roland had heard those words before. He believes it was his English professor, who was also the psychology professor who had brought it up whilst they were reading a book. He had described it as a form of protest or an act of martyrdom, because someone was literally lighting themselves on fire it was considered one of the most extreme methods of protest.

“Well, firstly self-immolation is setting yourself on fire, not blowing up. Pretty sure people who commit self-immolation also believe the world will get its shit together because of their protests. Clappers hate the world, they want it destroyed, no ifs, ands, or buts.”

Lev tries to say something, but he stops himself because Roland is right.

“Hey, be mad at me all you want, but you’ll have to get in line behind Connor and Risa.”

After supper Lilian’s father slips her from flats into heels, he makes sure she’s stable before guiding her onto the dance floor for a father-and-daughter dance. “Are you nervous?” He asks her.

“A little.”

“Well, don’t be, I’m right here.”

Danilo and Lilian dance alone on the dancefloor, Roland watches as their father asks Lilian a question, she accepts it, and their father lifts her up into the air he spins her around before setting her back down. The crowd cheers and they soon join them on the dance floor, Roland goes to sit in the corner not really wanting to dance until he has to. Out of the corner of his eye, he spots Nero walking up to Hayden, who looks horrified at the sight of her. The way Nero had half her hair dyed red and permed in curls made everyone instantly recognize whose face she had.

“Sorry, he came back from the dead.” She starts.

“I’m more scared that he came back as a sexy woman.”

“Ay, woah, cool it! I’m not into men.”

“I’m not into you either, I’m just stating the facts.” 

“Hmm, thanks, but I didn’t come for flattery, I came to give you closure.”

“Me?”

“Yes, you, listen, the way you look at me tells me a lot, you’ve been hurt by Mason. I just want you to know that you can rest easy. All I have is his skin, everything else is probably buried deeper than the respected dead. He’s gone, and he’s never coming back.”

Hayden nods. “That’s very nice of you to say, but I don’t think I should be the one hearing it.”

Nero furrows her brow as Hayden grabs a napkin from a nearby table and writes down a phone number and a name, he hands her the napkin. “That’s who needs closure, she’s busy dealing with the aftermath of Starkey’s harem.”

Nero goes wide-eyed. “He had a harem?”

Hayden nods. “Thankfully only one of three girls he had sex with actually produced a kid, and then she died in childbirth.”

Nero winces, “Yikes.”

“Yeah, Bam didn’t trust those two other girls with the baby, so she left them and took the baby with her.”

“What a noble woman.”

“Yeah, one of the only nice storks in Stork Brigade.”

Hayden leaves Nero alone with the number of a stork girl named Bambi. 

Lilian didn’t have a surprise dance after the waltz, but then that meant that after the waltz Roland and members of the court would have to invite someone onto the dancefloor. As the waltz ends and before Roland can even get up Hayden comes rushing over to him.

“Are you okay?” He asks.

“I want to dance with you,” Hayden confesses.

“You, you want to be chosen by a court member?”

“Well, not just any court member.” He mumbles.

Roland gets up, “Alright, come dance with me.” Roland grabs his arm and leads him to the dance floor. They’re mostly covered on all sides by people, making the moment feel more intimate than it already is.

Hayden looks into Roland’s eyes. “Your eyes look like watercolours.”

“Huh?”   

“Like the way the pigments are injected, I’ve never seen anything like it. When did you get them done?”

Roland is taken aback. “Hayden, they’ve been like this since before I was unwound.”

“Oh,” Hayden looks down, becoming a little sheepish. “I guess I never noticed.”

Hayden eventually looks back up into Roland’s eyes, and Roland becomes redder with every moment.

“Are you blushing?” Hayden asks him.

“Yes Captain Obvious, because someone is staring right into my soul.”

Hayden laughs. “Y’know someone from the graveyard once told me that, to have a soul, you had to be loved.”

“Oh, I’m feeling very loved right now,” Roland says sarcastically.

“Well prepare to be loved even more, ‘cause little ole me fucked over your ex’s chance of getting a good job!”

Roland’s entire world stops, and he backs away from Hayden. “You did what?”

Hayden panics. “I was going through public records and I found that a guy around your age named Trevor had to replace his testes. Research got the best of me and I found he went to your school and that multiple agencies were ready to pick him up. I just had to do something about it.”

“Hayden…”

Hayden pulls Roland's hands towards him. “This isn’t just about you! It’s about all the other people he could hurt in the future. You’d want people safe from him wouldn’t you?”

Roland nods, still letting Hayden hold onto his hands.

Hayden holds his hands close to his chest. “Listen, I feel bad that you invited me all the way out here and I didn’t bring anything. So umm, there’s kind of a ticket to a party I haven’t cashed out yet and… I’d be okay if you were my plus one.”

Roland smiles. “Are you asking me out on a date Mr. Upchurch?”

Hayden flushes red. “N-no what makes you say that? Do you want to go out on a date with me?” 

Roland laughs. “You know what? Maybe I would,” He brings his hands back into Hayden’s vision. “I asked because you’re also still holding my hands and being awkward.”

Hayden tries to pull away, but Roland tightens his grip around his hands whilst giggling.

Hayden bashfully tucks his chin into his neck, looking down like an embarrassed toddler. “You’ve got very pretty eyes, Roland.” He mumbles.

Roland hums, “I know, I’ve been told.”

An hour before the end of the ceremony Lilian cuts the cake with her group, and then they are left to join back in on the ceremony as her mother, abuela and tía set the cake down at each table. Roland goes over to Nero as she eats her slice. He supposes the entire party he wasn’t paying any attention to what she was wearing because it’s truly a shock when he looks at her. She wears a long shimmering light coral dress, the side of it has a slit so far up you can see where Roland’s old leg and the BioBuilder torso meet, there’s also plenty of inner boob. 

“Can you not stare at me like that?” She asks shyly. 

“Sorry,” He averts his gaze. “It’s a very pretty dress.” 

“I know, I’ve been ogled many times.” 

Roland sits down with her. 

“When does this party end?” She asks.

“Well, Lilian just cut the cake, so around another hour.” 

“Hmmph!” 

“You haven’t even said a word to Sam tonight, have you?” 

Nero sniffs. “Talking to him will just make me cry, I don’t want your sister or anyone to see me cry.” 

Roland nods. “I hear you went back to school again, why?”

Nero sighs. “I went to the flight academy to escape war, but it just brought me right back to it. So I’m taking courses in business so I can help Sam or something.” 

“That’s nice of you.”

“Yeah, yeah shut up.”

The party is close to ending as Lilian has her last dances, one with her father, one with her mother, and one with someone special in her life. Roland wonders who that will be, but it doesn’t take long for him to find out. As Lilian ends her dance with her mother she looks around for someone. 

“Roland?” She calls out.

Roland looks up and raises his hand. “I’m over here!” He shouts, he gets out of the seat next to Nero and runs over to her. 

“You wanted to dance with me?” He asks. 

Lilian nods, as they hold each other and sway Roland realizes something. 

“You’re crying.” Lilian notices. 

“It’s just, you’re all grown up now.” He sniffs.

“You sound like a dad.” 

“I did parent you, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, but I’m not that old yet, it’s still the beginning of my life.” 

“Yeah, it is.” 

[oncamelliastreet]

how are you doing today :)

if i’m being completely honest: absolutely awful.

today was my first day back at school and it was the worst. i’m not talking to a lot of my “friends” (read:all but one) because they’ve all collectively shown me that they’re not great friends, and i don’t like to surround myself with negative people, but unfortunately at my school that’s pretty much everyone so it just makes for a very lonely day. and plus my best friend has cancelled on hanging out with me 3 times in the last week, and we were supposed to do something thursday this week but she cancelled yet again this morning because she spontaneously has to go to a theme park thursday :( and also whenever i talked to her today i could tell she wasn’t really listening, or we would be hanging out with her boyfriends friends and one of them very clearly doesn’t like me so i felt so awkward everytime i tried to participate in convo…

and my school is changing a bunch of their policies even though everything was completely fine last year, so now we can’t even use our phones in the halls during pass period because if they’re seen they’ll get taken, we’re not allowed to listen to music during class, the only time we’re allowed to have them out is during lunch. and ik a lot of schools are doing that but it’s still super annoying because as a queer person in a catholic, homophobic, sexist school filled with homophobic, racist, sexist students, i’m not very interested in making new friends, so i’m just extra lonely and i really have to sit in my loneliness now. and they changed our lunch system so there’s only two lunches instead of three, so it’s extra crowded and they had to open up a whole new room for people to sit in because it’s not big enough, and it’s an unorganized mess

plus, i have chronic migraines, so i woke up with a headache because i was clenching my jaw from stress all night, so i had a really bad headache all day and it felt like my head was just gonna roll off and i literally almost passed out like 3 times because i would get so dizzy when i stood up. i came home and went straight to bed with an ice pack, so its better now, but that was still very not fun and i won’t be surprised if it hurts again tomorrow :/

and…idk. i just hate the school year in general. it’s so hopeless to get home in the afternoon and feel like i can’t start anything because the whole day is done. by the time i find the motivation to do what i enjoy, it’s already 9 o’clock and i don’t feel like starting something like writing just to stop in a couple hours. or i’ll do it and stay up and then i’m so exhausted in the morning so i feel like im dying. i really wanna leave this school, but im staying because they have one of the best art programs in the country. senior year i might just give up.

and i don’t really get to relax for the rest of the week, tomorrow i have therapy (which i definitely need but i really hate doing things after school during the school week), wednesday i have to go wedding dress shopping with my sister pretty far away so ill probably get home from school, leave, and then come back and go to bed which will definitely make me feel like shit, thursday i have nothing thank god. and then i have friday off because it’s a holiday weekend but i have to move my sister into her dorm, and that will be depressing as fuck because she’s literally my best friend in the world and we have a really small age gap between us so we’ve always been super close and i’m gonna miss her like crazy. so.

sorry, i dumped all my problems on you :/ how was your day? hopefully better <3 thanks for asking

[serenailith]

i’m lying just to keep you here

for @dreamlingbingo​

Square: c1, loud sex Rating: e Word Count: 6108 Ship(s): dream of the endless/hob gadling Warnings: none Additional Tags: alternate universe - human, alternate universe - university, friends to lovers, though they take the long way ‘round because they’re kinda idiots, heartbreak, anal sex, squint-and-you-miss-it semi-public sex, blowjobs, not actually unrequited love, requited unrequited love, fake/pretend relationship Summary:

It is less Hob convincing Morpheus that this was a good idea and more Morpheus's inability to say 'no' to Hob. Of course, life has a way of making sure that bites Morpheus in the arse.

Link: on ao3 masterlist

“Please pretend to be my boyfriend.”

Morpheus blinks stupidly for a moment then cocks his head. Hob stands before him with a pleading look on his face. Morpheus opens his mouth to respond, closes it, then tries again.

“Why would you need me to pretend to be your boyfriend?”

“My parents are coming to visit this weekend. I lied to them, saying I had a boyfriend just so they’d stop pestering me about dating someone. And Valentine’s Day is in a few weeks, so I know they’ll be worse if they knew the truth.”

“Your entire family knows we’re only friends.”

“Ah, but the best relationships begin with friendships.”

“Hob…”

“Please, Morpheus. I promise it’ll be the only time I ask this of you.” Hob clasps his hands in front of his chest beseechingly. “Please.”

Morpheus sighs and avoids Hob’s gaze. They’re friends—best friends, and have been since they were twelve—but this is a lot to ask of him. Hob can’t know how monumental this request is. But… Hob has always been there for Morpheus. There’s never been a time that he’s turned Morpheus away. The least Morpheus can do is help him this once.

“No cute nicknames for each other,” he warns. “They are nauseating.”

Hob chuckles and sticks out a hand. “Okay, deal. But, er, what about honey-butt?”

Morpheus snorts then dissolves into laughter. “Call me that,” he says once he’s calmed, “and your parents finding out we are not actually dating will be the least of your worries.”

“I’ll find something,” Hob promises with an appraising look.

Morpheus has no doubts about that. Hob is nothing if not imaginative, hopeful, and stubborn. Hob squeezes Morpheus’s hand before turning, calling out a goodbye as he sprints away. Morpheus watches him go then closes his door.

Maybe this won’t be so bad, a voice in the back of his mind says, and he scoffs. It’s going to be just as bad as he fears. There’s no way around that fact. He’ll end up looking foolish. But just think, you can pretend it’s real.

And that’s what will hurt the most.

True to Hob’s word, he arrives outside Morpheus’s room bright and early Saturday morning, parents in tow. Robert Sr. claps a hand to Morpheus’s shoulder, despite knowing full well that Morpheus doesn’t like being touched, while Elizabeth beams brightly and passes over a small box. Inside, Morpheus knows, are baked goods he will eat a quarter of before Hob takes the rest. He sets the box on his desk then turns back to his best friend’s parents.

Elizabeth tuts quietly and brushes a piece of lint from her son’s shoulder. Her hazel eyes pin Morpheus in place when she looks at him once more. “Morpheus, dear, tell us the truth. Are you really dating Robbie?”

Hob rolls his eyes before shooting Morpheus a Look. One that says Please for the love of all that’s holy, go along with this, or I might just lose my mind. Morpheus bites back a smile and nods.

“I am.”

“When did this happen?” she asks, frowning—Morpheus can see the disappointment in her eye. He only hopes she approves of the ‘relationship’. It would make life difficult if Elizabeth Gadling supported the friendship but not Hob and Morpheus dating.

Why is he even entertaining these thoughts? They aren’t dating. Morpheus knows this. He needs to remember it, or things are going to get uncomfortable.

“It wasn’t too long ago, Mum,” says Hob with a grimace. “It just… happened. Now can we go get breakfast?”

Morpheus takes pity on his friend, crossing his arms over his chest. Hunching in on himself, he weaves a tale of how he and Hob had been studying one night when Hob had looked at Morpheus and asked if he’d want to go out to dinner. Of course Morpheus had hesitated: What if it ruined the friendship? But Hob had been so adamant about nothing changing, not really: “All that will be different,” Morpheus claims he said, “is I get to kiss you whenever I want.”

“How sweet,” Elizabeth gushes before she allows her son to usher the group from Morpheus’s room.

Breakfast is a boisterous affair. Hob chats with his parents about his schooling, about how things are at home. Elizabeth carefully avoids asking Morpheus about his family, everyone but his older sister. Thana is never a sore subject, and he will talk about her as often as anyone will allow.

Morpheus barely manages to not jolt in surprise when a warm hand wraps around his; he glances at Hob from the corner of his eye, but Hob doesn’t look back. Instead, he continues eating with one hand and chatting as if there is nothing unusual about holding his best friend’s hand in front of his parents.

Thankfully, none of the Gadlings expect Morpheus to stay with them all day. He makes an excuse to leave, apologising for the mountain of schoolwork he has yet to do. He’s just turned to walk away when Hob pulls him back; Morpheus stares blankly when lips brush against his. Hob grins and releases him.

“I’ll come by when it’s dinner.”

“O—okay.”

Morpheus walks away awkwardly. His mouth burns with the gentle pressure of Hob’s kiss, and his skin prickles with the ghost of Hob’s touch. I am in trouble. He waits until he gets back to his room before closing the door, leaning against the wood, and letting out a heavy sigh. He truly is in trouble. So much trouble.

This was such an awful idea. He should never have gone along with Hob’s half-baked plan.

Morpheus can admit, only in the deepest stretch of night, that he has been in love with Hob since they were fourteen and he was clambering through Hob’s window after yet another disastrous dinner at home. Hob had always vowed to pull Morpheus away from the home life he was subjected to. Morpheus had always wanted Hob to do exactly that.

It was a dream never to come to fruition. Hob would never rescue Morpheus, but uni would. Morpheus struck out on his own—or, rather, not on his own but with Hob. They had no classes together, and they didn’t share a room. But they always made time for a weekly lunch, and more often than not, Hob could be found sat at the desk, head pillowed on his arms as he slept off hours of studying.

It was no wonder, really, that Morpheus would develop feelings for Hob. He had been a constant in Morpheus’s life for too long. Morpheus will never act on them, not honestly. This facade is as close as he will ever get to knowing Hob’s affection.

Hob’s parents leave shortly before sundown, and Hob slumps as soon as their car is out of sight.

“You’ve no idea how you’ve saved me, mate.”

Morpheus shrugs, tucking his hands into his pockets. “You have done enough for me over the years.”

“Film marathon?”

Morpheus only nods. His skin already prickles with the imagined heat of Hob’s body so near as they sit on the bed, side-by-side with their arms pressed together, as Morpheus’s laptop plays whatever film Hob has chosen.

He never lets Morpheus choose, not since he put on a documentary about galaxies. Hob had fallen asleep with his head on Morpheus’s shoulder and his hand on Morpheus’s thigh. Morpheus, for his part, had stayed as still as possible for as long as possible if only to enjoy what would never truly be his.

Lucienne stares at Morpheus the next morning over the table in the dining hall. “You’re bothered by something.”

“I am fine,” he protests.

He doesn’t know why he’s lying to her. She is as close to him as Hob is. In different ways, of course. Lucienne knows of his love for Hob, the dreams he has of one day Hob knowing and loving him back. She knows things that Morpheus could never tell Hob if he doesn’t want to ruin their friendship.

“It has to do with Hob, doesn’t it?”

“Luce—”

“Morpheus… What did you do this time?”

Morpheus opens his mouth to argue, but there’s no point. So he admits to the scheme and how it’s already hurting to pretend something he’s wanted for so long. Lucienne sets her spoon down and reaches across the table to hold his hand.

“You are one of my dearest friends, you know this, right?” At his nod, she squeezes his hand and frowns. “I say this with love: This is perhaps the stupidest thing you have ever done.”

“I don’t think—”

“I do. I absolutely do believe you are an utter fool for going along with this. It is breaking your heart, despite your saying otherwise.”

“Hob would never hurt me.”

“Hob doesn’t know he’s doing it, does he? He thinks this is a way of placating his family, but he doesn’t know you wish it was real. But he is absolutely hurting you.” She sighs and pushes her glasses up her nose. “I think you should put an end to this before you get hurt beyond repair.”

“I will follow through on my promise,” he all but growls as he yanks his hand away.

“I’m sorry, Morpheus, but… I can’t watch you destroy yourself just to make him happy. When will you ever put yourself first?”

She rises to her feet and strides away without waiting for an answer. Morpheus lays his spoon flat on the table, burying his face in his hands, and draws in a shaky breath. Lucienne has never walked away from him. Not like this. Not with such disappointment and disapproval in her eyes. She has always understood, even when she scolded him for being a pushover when it came to Hob.

Thankfully, Hob has decided that their charade should continue on campus though his family is nowhere near. “Easier to stay in character whenever they come around,” he says as he hefts his bag further onto his shoulder, “if we’re never really out.”

In character. Right. Morpheus wishes he could stop forgetting it’s just a game of make-believe.

So Morpheus does his damnedest to not preen whenever Hob holds his hand or presses a warm kiss to his cheek or pulls him in for an embrace that lasts a beat too long to be platonic. There is no stopping the skip of his heart and the fire in his blood with each touch, and he can’t control his dreams of which Hob has taken control. What were once idle musings, innocent ‘what ifs’, have now become things of want. Morpheus always wakes himself, but just once, he aches to allow himself to dream of what being with Hob might feel like.

“So where’s Lucienne been?” Hob asks as he drives them back to the house he rents with three classmates.

“We are… at odds with one another,” Morpheus admits, his heart sinking in his chest at the reminder.

It’s been nearly a week since she walked away from Morpheus that morning, and there’s been no contact since. She doesn’t even look in his direction anymore.

“Thought you two were close?”

“The same could be said about us.”

Hob huffs out a laugh and glances at Morpheus. “Trying to say you and I could be on the outs just as easily?”

No, never. I love you too much. “I have my doubts.”

Every light in the house is on by the time Hob parks, and people spill out through the front door, milling around in the freezing late-January air. Hob shakes his head with a snort of amusement, then he and Morpheus exit the car. They shove their way through the partygoers until they’re in the warmth of inside. Hob gestures toward the kitchen, disappearing when Morpheus nods an acknowledgement. He weaves around clusters of fellow students dancing, gyrating and bouncing on the balls of their feet; liquid sloshes from cups held in aloft, and Morpheus doesn’t manage to dodge a splash in time. The whisky drips down his right arm, and the young woman squeaks out an apology.

He ignores her and finds a place off to the side to stand. Hob will find him in this crowd. Hob always does.

“I just… I don’t get it,” Marcus slurs almost two hours later, waving his cup of beer around. “Hobsie has never dated anyone since unie started, and now he’s dating you?”

John snorts and nods vigorously. “Yeah. What makes you so special?”

“Just because you’re his friend,” Marcus adds, and if Morpheus didn’t know better, he’d say Marcus is pouting. That Marcus is jealous.

Morpheus swallows thickly, acid rising his blood. His cheeks burn, and he blinks rapidly. It would do no good for them to realise how they have affected him so. They need not know they’ve voiced doubts that should not exist. If Hob’s friends doubt the validity of the relationship, it’s only a matter of time before others do, too.

He shoves himself between John and Lyle, storms across the room.

Hob’s eyes widen when Morpheus cups his cheeks and tugs him in for a hard kiss. The first kiss Morpheus has ever initiated, and it’s out of spite. Hob exhales sharply, whisky-stained breath ghosting across Morpheus’ heated cheeks, as Morpheus drags his tongue along the seam of his lips. Are you sure? is spoken in the hesitation.

I am certain, Morpheus replies just as silently in the way he tilts his head.

Someone cheers while another whistles, the shrill sound cutting through the music. Hob wraps an arm around Morpheus’s shoulders and somehow deepens the kiss further. Morpheus’s stomach clenches. His knees could give out at any minute. He never would have imagined Hob as such a skilled kisser; certainly none of the chaste kisses prior to now indicated as much.

“C’mon,” Hob murmurs in Morpheus’s ear, “let’s get away from the audience.”

Morpheus lets Hob link their fingers together, lets him steer them toward the stairs amid catcalls and more whistles. People clap hands to shoulders and give winks and bright smiles as the couple passes.

None of them know how fake this is.

How Morpheus doesn’t want it to be fake anymore.

As soon as his bedroom door is shut and locked behind them, Hob seems to lose all confidence. He scratches at his brow then tugs at his left earlobe. Morpheus bites back a smile and passes him to sit on the bed. Hob hesitates, stands completely still, then moves toward Morpheus.

“Might as well make it seem more real, right?” he whispers before his lips crash to Morpheus’s again.

Morpheus closes his eyes as another crack runs through his heart. He keeps forgetting this is an act. That Hob doesn’t truly care for him like that. It’s only a beneficial agreement to get Hob’s family to back off. Morpheus pulls back, forcing a smile.

“If we want to make it seem real,” he whispers, lips brushing Hob’s, “we might as well give them something to gossip about.”

Hob’s brows furrow, mouth opening, but Morpheus moans aloud. Hob rears back, watches as Morpheus whines his name, as he crawls across the bed to smack at the wall. Intelligent young man he is, Hob catches on quickly and joins Morpheus at the head of the mattress. Morpheus wants it to be real, hearing Hob groaning like this, and he lets out a rumbled moan that echoes in the sudden quiet.

Music no longer filters through the floor, the door. They are listening, Morpheus thinks even as he opens his mouth. Out spills a litany of pleas; desire and want make themselves known in each word. Hob smacks the wall with his fist as he moans out a ‘You feel amazing’.

Morpheus’s entire world narrows to this—the tightening in his gut as his gaze runs along Hob’s body, the tenting of Hob’s joggers, the lust in Hob’s eyes most likely mirroring his own. It may be fake, this agreement, but Morpheus’s lust is overwhelmingly real. He reaches for Hob, hand clutching at his T-shirt, and yanks his best friend toward him.

Music blares from the speakers once more, drowning out the low groan that escape Hob’s lips.

Morpheus doesn’t know who leans in first, but it feels like no time has passed before Hob is sprawled, naked and straining beneath him. Morpheus’s hands make quick work of shucking his own shirt, his trousers, his boxer-briefs until he can straddle Hob’s hips with nothing between them. The heated point of contact spurs on the fire in his blood.

Morpheus knew of Hob’s thighs, his belly slightly soft but still so muscular, and the soft curls covering his chest. He knew of that—too many years in each other’s lives—but it’s nothing compared to what his clothes have kept hidden. He leans down to kiss Hob, gasping at the pressure against his cock, then slides along his best friend’s body until his mouth hovers over Hob’s dick.

“Do you want this?” he murmurs as he presses his forehead to Hob’s hip. “Hob… Tell me to stop.”

Hob reaches with one shaking hand to card his fingers through Morpheus’s hair. “Don’t. Please, don’t stop.”

Morpheus carefully takes Hob into his mouth, slowly draws him in further, until his nose brushes the thatch of hair at the base. Hob’s hips jerk, but he stills as Morpheus adjusts to the weight on his tongue. The strain of his jaw. The taste of skin and precum and everything Hob. He pulls back until just the tip rests between his lips, and he looks up at Hob through his lashes.

His friend’s head is dropped back against the pillows, hands spread to his sides and clutching at the bedsheets, and sweat glistens already on his bare skin. Morpheus hums in approval before swallowing Hob down once more.

One of Hob’s hands finds a home in Morpheus’s hair moments later. Morpheus lets him tug and push, guide him in a rhythm that pleases Hob. Saliva drips from the corners of his lips as Hob fucks into his mouth with such gentleness that Morpheus could cry. Somehow, Hob knows just how deep he can go without choking Morpheus, and isn’t that enough to spark a goddamn inferno in Morpheus’s chest?

“L—love, stop.”

Morpheus immediately does as asked, massaging at his jaw as he meets Hob’s eye. Hob reaches for him, and Morpheus goes willingly. Straddles Hob’s hips once more. Hob mumbles out an apology, an excuse of being too close already. Without speaking, Morpheus leans to the side and opens the drawer to the nightstand, pulls out the bottle of lube he knows is there. Once it’s in hand, he presses it to Hob’s chest and swallows harshly.

“Fuck me.”

The words are crass, inelegant, and they draw a groan from deep in Hob’s throat. “Oh, this must be a dream,” he says even as he fumbles for the lube. “This is a dream, isn’t it?”

You dream of this? The question doesn’t fall from Morpheus’s lips. Instead, he ducks his head to kiss Hob and allows the other man to pull him closer. Morpheus plants one hand against the wall, the other on Hob’s chest, as Hob slides a finger between his arsecheeks. A gasp stutters free when Hob’s fingertip catches on his hole; Hob smiles up at him, an interesting little curve of his lips and softened eyes full of something too close to wonder and love, and presses inward.

Morpheus doesn’t do this often. He hasn’t done this in over a year, and even then, it wasn’t like this. It was never right with Cori. There was just enough care that Morpheus wouldn’t be injured while Cori fucked him with fervour, but it didn’t feel as natural as it does now. Morpheus knows it isn’t real, it never will be.

At least he’ll have this memory when it ends. He isn’t sure if that makes it better or worse.

By the time he sinks onto Hob’s cock, inching himself slowly down until he’s fuller than he has ever been, Morpheus is nearly sobbing with want. He rolls his hips and digs his fingernails into the expanse of Hob’s chest as he loses track of everything but this.

He has never allowed himself to imagine what Hob looks like completely nude, but he gets to see it now. He gets to feel every inch of his best friend and the trembling between his thighs. He learns what Hob’s kisses taste like and what he sounds like with that first glide of their bodies.

The noiess Hob makes are more beautiful now. His moans and gasps are because of Morpheus, for Morpheus. Morpheus rolls his hips again, stealing the moan that splits the air between them, and does it again. Hot hands grip his waist, and Morpheus follows where Hob leads, rises and falls with his touch.

He has wanted this for so long. His eyes burn, tears building but not falling.

“Oh, God,” Hob moans as Morpheus moves more quickly, more insistently. “Fuck, this is—You are better than any dream, love.”

Morpheus would be his dream if Hob let him be.

“So are you,” he whispers, leaning down to kiss Hob again. His head spins with each thrust, each stroke of their tongues, each breath lingering between them. “Don’t stop. Please, I beg of you.”

“Never, my dream, never.”

The tear slips free before Morpheus can stop it. He sits upright as Hob’s hips snap up, as he buries himself even deeper. Pressing his palms to Hob’s shoulders, Morpheus rises until just the tip remains inside of him, stares down at Hob for a second. Dark brown eyes meet his, and brows furrow in concern—Morpheus will always be able to read those expressions so clearly. Before Hob can say anything and ruin the illusion, Morpheus lowers himself swiftly and forces away any words Hob might have had.

Hob pushes up onto one elbow, an arm wrapping around Morpheus’s shoulders, and plants his feet against the mattress. Morpheus keens with the change in angle, the forceful thrusts as Hob’s cock slides across his prostate. His nails dig into Hob’s skin as he lets himself be fucked until all he can think of is Hob, Hob, Hob.

Hob’s name is the sweetest thing on his lips when he comes.

As he stares down at Hob, body rocking as his best friend chases his own release, Morpheus’s only regret is that he can never make the look in Hob’s eyes last forever.

Morpheus leaves Hob’s room the next morning with a breaking heart and knowledge he can never come back from.

Though the act is meant to be of the two of them as a couple for Valentine’s Day two days after the party, Morpheus expects nothing for the day in question. What he gets, however, is a bouquet of cloth flowers, a box of chocolates, and an invitation for their first date. Hob sits far too close as his fingers lace with Morpheus’s; if anyone doubts the relationship now, no one speaks of it. Morpheus accepts the invitation as eagerly as possible, though he seeks out Lucienne as soon as Hob has disappeared off to class.

“You were right,” he says once he finds her in the library.

“Oh?”

“I should have listened to you. It was… It is such a foolish idea that I could do this for Hob without being hurt in the process.”

She finally looks away from her book, and whatever she sees on his face has her full attention. She pushes aside her notepad and pen, clasping her hands together before her. “Oh, Morpheus. What happened?”

“I made a grievous mistake,” he manages to utter. “I thought I would be fine.”

“But you aren’t.”

He squeezes his eyes closed against the burning, but the tears slip free. “I am not.”

“End this, Morpheus. Tell Hob you can no longer do as he wants.”

“I cannot break a promise. I never have before.”

“Morpheus…”

“You said you cannot watch me destroy myself. Please do not make me go through this alone.”

“How much longer?” she asks after a long moment, and Morpheus lets out a trembling breath. “When will this farce end?”

“We agreed it would happen sometime after today.”

“One week, Morpheus. For your sake, do not let it drag on longer.”

Morpheus readily agrees. Lucienne has always been pragmatic and so human. So knowledgeable. She’s right.

He doesn’t tell her about the date Hob has planned.

The date goes better than Morpheus expected. They go to dinner at a rather upscale restaurant; Morpheus pointedly doesn’t ask how Hob earned enough money to pay for such extravagance—or why he’s gone for something so… much. After, they go for a stroll through the city park, bundled up tightly in their coats and leaning into each other’s warmth.

Hob is the consummate gentleman the entire time, even walks Morpheus to his door at the end of the night. Morpheus shifts awkwardly as they stand in the corridor before Hob takes all chances from him: He leans forward and kisses Morpheus softly, tentatively, as if seeking permission. Morpheus gives it willingly, far more eagerly than he had accepted the date. His hand fumbles for the doorknob, but it finally twists beneath his palm, and they stumble over the threshold.

Hob manages to close the door behind him, apologising into the kiss when it slams into its frame. Morpheus doesn’t give a damn. He only nips at Hob’s lower lip and lets his hands roam. Thankfully, they both know the layout of the room, have had it memorised since Morpheus moved in, so it’s no hardship to find his bed without looking.

There are no tears this time, though there is a sharper, more violent kind of pain that curls deep in Morpheus’s chest. It digs its claws in more securely, scratching idly as his cum stripes across Hob’s belly. You’re beautiful. The beast snarls and sinks its teeth into his soul. Be mine. There is no dislodging the creature that eats through the cracks in his heart.

Hob comes with a bitten off “Fuck, Dream of mine,” and Morpheus feels the last of himself being devoured.

Unfortunately, ‘breaking up’ with Hob turns out to be impossible. The first time he tries at the end of the week, he ends up bare-arsed leaning over a desk as Hob fucks him quick and dirty. The second time, another week has passed, and he has Hob on his knees and is fucking into his best friend’s mouth almost viciously.

The third time… The third time damn near kills him, and it isn’t even him who does it.

“We should end this,” Hob says suddenly, as if they aren’t holding hands while having a pleasant stroll across campus to enjoy the rare warmth. “I mean… Valentine’s Day is over, right?”

“R—right.”

Hob shrugs and stares at the bare branches of the trees lining the paths. He doesn’t speak for a long minute. Even if he had, Morpheus would never have heard him. Not for the thundering in his ears and the beast screaming in his chest. Hob sighs and nudges Morpheus with his shoulder.

“No point in continuing the charade. So now we can go back to how things used to be.”

“What will you tell your family?” Morpheus chokes out; he’s oddly proud of how steady his voice remains.

“I’ll figure something out, I always do.” After a short pause, Hob speaks again, voice lower, “Thank you. For, er, going along with it.”

Morpheus carefully disentangles his fingers from Hob’s and steps away. Both come to a stop in the middle of the pavement, Hob with furrowed brow and Morpheus with shattering heart. Forcing a smile, Morpheus does the only thing he can: He turns and walks away.

Hob doesn’t call after him.

The ‘relationship’ is over. The friendship is over, and it’s all because he couldnt’ say no to Hob. If he had, if he’d just told Hob to find someone—anyone—else, Morpheus wouldn’t be losing the best friend he’s ever had. He wouldn’t know what it’s like to fall asleep beside Hob or to have Hob so damn deep inside of him, he can almost drink the love that doesn’t exist. He would be clueless as to what Hob’s release tastes like and what it feels like to open up for wandering, persistent fingers and a dick that fits so well.

To Morpheus’s surprise, Hob doesn’t try to find him over the next week. Then again, it isn’t as if Morpheus is off searching for Hob, though. He spends the hours between classes in the library with Lucienne or locked in his room. It’s easier this way. At least if he’s alone, he can’t be reminded of Hob or the incredibly poorly-conceived farce to convince the Gadlings that Hob needed no help in finding a partner. Morpheus doesn’t have to see Hob’s friends, he doesn’t risk running into his former best friend at all.

Former. How devastatingly lonesome a word can be. Morpheus thought that if he and Hob were to ever end their friendship, it would be over a mistake that Morpheus made. That Morpheus would be the one to walk away. That’s exactly what happened.

It isn’t satisfying to be right.

The friendship is truly over, Morpheus thinks, when it’s been over a month and there has been no sign of Hob, no word from him. They know each other’s schedules, the routines, so Morpheus is well aware of the fact that Hob is going out of his way to avoid Morpheus. The only reason he would do that is if Hob wanted nothing more to do with Morpheus.

The beast has grown larger, more violent, especially in the night. Though he’s washed his bedsheets dozens of times, he can almost smell Hob in the threads. The ghost of a memory brings with it the sounds Hob made that night, every time they touched and came together and found pieces of themselves mixed in the other. The creature has devoured Morpheus’s heart. Now it feeds off his soul, the love he yearns to share with Hob but never can.

Matthew, an audacious and quite persistent American student, somehow convinces Lucienne and Morpheus to come with him to dinner to “celebrate the end of exams”. Rather, he convinces Lucienne who convinces Morpheus. After the support she’s given him since the debacle with Hob, the least Morpheus can do is go along with her plans.

She admits, as she walks with Morpheus to Matthew’s room, that the American has grown on her.

“He’s… brash and crass, sometimes, but he could be worse.”

“Do you have feelings for him?” Morpheus asks, frowning when her peal of laughter rings out.

“Of course not. I don’t dislike him, but there is nothing there. Worry not, Morpheus, you would be the first to know if I harboured any feelings toward someone.”

For as bold as Matthew is, his driving is the complete opposite. He drives carefully, as if Morpheus and Lucienne are precious cargo, and Morpheus relaxes further into his seat the longer they go without an accident.

The diner is nearly empty when they walk in. Morpheus looks around—ignores Professor Dee sat at the counter with a cup of coffee—only to freeze when his gaze lands on the back corner. Matthew’s large hand shoves at his shoulder until he stumbles forward a step.

“Good luck,” Lucienne whispers as she and Matthew move to a booth off to the side.

‘Good luck’?

No.

But it’s too late. Hob has seen him. Morpheus can’t walk away now; it would look too much like running. So he straightens his spine and weaves his way around the tables until he reaches the booth in which Hob sits.

“Hello, Hob.”

“We need to talk.”

Morpheus glances over his shoulder. Lucienne watches closely. Matthew gives him a thumbs-up and a bright, encouraging smile. It hardly does the trick, but Morpheus appreciates the gesture. He sits across from Hob.

“I fucked things up, didn’t I.”

It isn’t a question, but Morpheus answers anyway: “No.”

“Don’t lie to me, Morpheus.” Hob shakes his head and stares at the tabletop. “I should never have asked you to pretend to be my boyfriend. I should have known it would only ruin our friendship.”

“It wasn’t—it wasn’t that.”

Hob’s gaze leaps to Morpheus’s face. Heat lives in the brown, and his lips are pressed into a tight line. “Then what was it? Because from where I’m sat—”

“We slept together.” Hob falls silent, and Morpheus swallows against the lump in his throat. The tears in his eyes. “We slept together, which was not what I planned.”

“You wanted it, too.”

“Hob. I am not accusing you of taking advantage of me.”

“Then what are you saying?”

“I’m saying it became too real for me,” Morpheus admits in a rush.

The words tumble between them. Hob sighs and picks at the corner of his napkin. Morpheus sits awkwardly, waiting for some sort of response. Eventually, Hob blows out a breath.

“It was real to me, too.”

“Then why did you—?”

“Because I knew you were trying to end it,” Hob snaps, and Morpheus rears back. This is a side to his best friend he’s rarely seen before, and never aimed at him. “Shit, sorry. Not… I just—I wanted nothing more than to make it real, to not have it be pretend anymore, but I knew you were trying to find the right time to give me the boot.”

“I thought it was nothing to you. That I was only hurting myself for your happiness.”

“Oh, love.”

Hob reaches across the table with one hand, and Morpheus hesitates. Can this actually be real? Or is this a dream he’s meant to wake from, to suffer through only to find himself alone in bed with only the monster in his chest for company?

But no, Hob is smiling something tender, hopeful, and Morpheus‘s heart jolts beneath his ribs. He knows that smile, though it’s never quite been aimed at him like this. Not so soft.

He takes Hob’s hand, face heating at the loud “Fuck yes!” that comes from behind him. He can hear Lucienne hissing something—most likely an admonishment—but Hob’s laughter distracts him. Hob clears his throat as all amusement fades.

“I… I guess I should have talked to you instead of making assumptions.”

“I could have done the same,” Morpheus counters.

“So now that’s out of the way, should we invite Lucienne and her friend over?”

“Why would we do that?”

“Because they brought you to me.”

Hob gestures before Morpheus can respond. This was all orchestrated by Hob? It makes a certain amount of sense. It would have been too much of an unbelievable coincidence for Hob to just be in the same place that Matthew and Lucienne would bring Morpheus. But why?

If Hob is telling the truth—if it was as real to him as it ever was for Morpheus—then…

Morpheus blinks back tears and squeezes Hob’s hand.

The beast yowls in protest, but it’s devoured by the warmth Hob has always provided.

The quartet are unceremoniously ushered from the diner at half-eleven. Matthew and Lucienne go to his car, while Morpheus follows Hob to his. The drive back to the dormitories is quiet, though Hob never releases Morpheus’s hand. Once they arrive, Morpheus leads Hob through the corridors to his room.

“I’m sorry it took such a mess to get us here,” Hob says with a wry smile, and Morpheus shakes his head.

“When have you ever taken the easy route?”

“Would you want to go on another date?”

Morpheus chews on his lower lip, nods. What a ridiculous question. Of course he wants another date. He wants more than one; he wants a lifetime’s worth.

“Pick me up Friday after Psychology?”

“Got it.” Hob leans in, pressing a gentle kiss to Morpheus’s lips. “Goodnight, my dream.”

Morpheus watches him disappear around the corner before opening his door. Closing it behind him feels a lot like closing a book on an unfinished chapter. Something doesn’t feel right about how they’ve left it.

He yanks open the door once more only to collide with Hob. He cradles Hob’s cheeks with shaking hands and meets his gaze.

“Do you mean it? Am I really your dream?”

“You are,” Hob manages before Morpheus is dropping a hand to his T-shirt, fisting the collar and tugging Hob inside.

[abbatoirablaze]

Down The Rabbit Hole, Chapter 17

Word Count:  1.3k

Warnings: none

“You know I’m really excited…” you smiled, looking at Jeff from the other side of the tree.  Jeff gave you a broad smile as he continued to fluff up the branches, “our first Christmas living together…and we’re hosting a Christmas party with the group…”

“I’m just happy that enough time has passed that Abed’s finally managed to forgive us…”

“Me too…it’ll be nice to see the whole group again…you know, together.”

“They’re alright,” he smiled, “I just can’t wait until the party is over and I can give you my Christmas present to you!”

“Jeff, I thought we agreed that we weren’t going to exchange gifts.”

“Can you really blame me for wanting to treat my girlfriend?”

You smiled, and leaned across to press a sweet kiss to his cheek, “well…in that case, I can think of an impromptu gift that I know you’ll love.”

He all but lit up as he raised a brow, “oh really now?”

“Mhmmm,” you teased, “but it only happens after everyone’s gone!”

“Oh this party is going to be over so quick!” he teased back. 

“So…how did the group react when you told them we were hosting?”

“About that,” he frowned, “I uh…might have forgotten to mention that we live together.”

Your eyes went wide, “you didn’t tell any of them we live together?”

“You know how they are,” he shrugged, “I mean…they’ll find out when they get here, right?”

“Jeff, we’ve lived together now for over six months.  How has no one figured it out?”

He shrugged, “I don’t know.  I mean, I’ve always kept a tight lid on my personal life.  You know that.  Honestly, I don’t even think the dean knows.”

“Oh…he knows,” you laughed, a blush crossing your cheeks, “he uh-asked me last week because of when you let my name slip…”

Jeff’s eyes widened, “he…heard us?”

“Oh yeah, big guy.  He heard us!”

A blush coated your boyfriend’s cheeks as someone knocked on the door.

“It’s open!” you both responded.

Annie burst into the apartment with bags galore, “look at us.  Our group’s first grown-up Christmas party!  Thanks for hosting.  I hope you don’t mind, I brought a few things to make this place look a little less short-term corporate housing.”

“Oh, well mi casa es su art project!” Jeff teased. 

You gave your boyfriend a playful look and he gave you one in kind, “what’d you bring to spice the place up, Annie?”

“I didn’t know you’d arrive early too!” she smiled, “but that’s even better.  I’ll need all the help I can get to make this place looking like a woman lives here!”

“Is that so?” you remarked teasingly as you looked at your boyfriend.  He chuckled to himself while Annie began pulling things out of her bags.  She put out a vase with some pink flowers, and a green and purple decorative pillow, putting them on the chairs.

“Cool.  I’m thinking a little something there.  A little zhuzh right there!  Just a few little things to add a little Annie!”

“A little Annie?” you asked, an amused tone coating your voice as you raised your brow at Jeff.

“Annie do we have to have another talk about you wanting to play house with me?”

“Sha!” she smiled, turning to look at him.  When his arm slipped around your waist, she gave a pained look at you both and turned on her heel, “sha-na-not!  I’m just decorating for a party!”

“Well I’m happy to say that the apartment is being lived in…by me and Tawney…so the place already has a good bit of a woman’s touch.”

“Last week we painted the dining room blue!” you smiled, gesturing to the room behind the two of you.  Annie frowned ever so slightly as she saw the decorations in the living room and the new painting as well, “little steps work better for Jeff…we haven’t gotten to the living room yet.  Only the master bathroom, our bedroom, and dining room.  I was just convincing him that we need to do the kitchen next!”

“Oh….well I could help with the living room.  I just saw these curtains and I couldn’t resist!” she said quickly, pulling the almost sheer purple curtains from her bag, “let’s just live with them for a night.  And we can totally return them!”

Jeff glanced at them quickly, as she shoved half into his hands, “oh let’s totally return them.”

“Jeff, be nice!” you teased, “Annie, we’d love to see how they look.  Jeff, help Annie hang them up!  I do really hate those blinds!”

“Right?” she asked, “Jeff, just live with them for one night!”

“Actually, these would work for Valentines Day…president’s day.  Whenever people get to see it.” Annie smiled and gave you a victorious look before Jeff’s face fell as he noticed there was actual presents in the bag, “Annie…what is this?”

“Oh.  I know that we said no gifts, but I couldn’t resist!” She said quickly, grabbing two more decorative throws and putting them around the living room.

“You realize you’ve just put your friends in a very awkward position!” he said as she went to hang her coat up, “A gift creates obligation!”

“Funny of you to put it that way when you got me a gift when we agreed not to!”

“Well, that’s different!” he said, giving you a soft look, “this gift is really important.”

“Oh, is it?”

“It is!”

“Merry Christmas!” Shirely said, pushing a cart of gifts into the apartment, “I know that we said no gifts, but I couldn’t resist!”

“Oh, who couldn’t have seen that coming?” he asked.

“Oh, Annie, I love what you did with the place!”

“It’s a work in progress!”

“The redecorating actually was Tawney’s idea.  Annie just brought pillows!” Jeff said in an unamused tone.

“Tawney?”

“Yes…Tawney and I are living together now!” You cleared your throat and Jeff gave you another look. “We’ve been living together since this summer.”

Shirley gave the two of you a look before making the sign of the cross, “oh, forgive these two unwedded people, lord.”

You stifled your giggles while Jeff scowled at Shirley. 

“Good tidings Christmas celebrators!” Troy grinned, bags in his hands as he and Britta entered, “and to all a good wassailing.”

“I know that we said no gifts, but we couldn’t resist!” Britta added in, coming into the living room. 

“There’s a real problem with resistance in this group!”

Chang and Abed followed shortly after, with Abed making a comment about Annie living at Jeffs, to which the both of you kept your mouths shut.

“I’m going to go check on the food!” you answered, kissing Jeff on the cheek.  He smiled and nodded, while Annie told the group that they were failing the group paper they had to turn in, so Annie invited Professor Cornwallis to the party.

“So, how has everyone been?” you asked, when the conversation died down, “ever since I started teaching, I feel like I haven’t been able to keep up with anyone…you know, aside from Jeff!  And even then, I feel like I’m only getting half the story.”

“Well, we uh-“

“It’s been good!” Abed said shortly. 

You nodded, not really knowing where else to take the conversation.

“So how has it been?” Annie asked, “you and Jeff living together and all?”

The room was silent. 

You could see how everyone was looking at you.

“You and Jeff moved in together?”

“When?” Britta asked.

“And why weren’t we live tweeting it?” Troy asked.

“We didn’t want to bother any of you on your days off,” Jeff said quickly, “Tawney and I did it over the summer, and we thought that you guys would all have plans.  So we-“

“Is that why the place is painted, and there’s art on the walls?” Britta asked, her eyes looking around the apartment.  And that’s when she started noticing pictures of you and Jeff spread through the apartment, “you two really did do it!  I thought it was just the colorful pillows and the curtain that Annie got, but you guys are really doing it!”

“Well yeah…we’ve been together for-“

A knock on the door interrupted what you were saying. 

“I should get that!” you said quickly, making your way around the island, “help yourselves to some tapas.”

Chapter 18

Tag List:  @lohnes16, @mckeeee-1

[rafor]

Chapter 57 - Waiting and Learning - The Glitch

I reached for Erebus and asked him, “How long does it usually take to travel from the lands of the hidden shadows to here?” He looked at me and said, “Are you asking this because of Akira and her boyfriend?” I nodded and said, “Yeah, I’m curious when they’ll arrive, maybe.” He thought for a moment and then said, “It takes a few days; I don’t remember exactly, but they could show up at any time.” I wasn’t satisfied with his vague answer, so I pressed on. “Should we wait for them at the meeting point?” He shook his head and said, “You can wait for them at the lake if you want. I have some business to attend to these days, and I won’t be able to assist you full-time. I’m sorry.” I smiled and said, “Don’t worry, take your time. I’ll wait for them.” Then Siveth joined us and said, “Do you need a bodyguard or something for that?” I frowned and said, “What the hell, Siveth? Were you listening to us the whole time?” She shrugged and said, “Yup, is that a problem?” I said, “Yeah, it is. I’d like to have some privacy while talking with a Guardian.” But Erebus said, “It’s fine. As long as it’s about topics like these, we have nothing to hide.” I was already getting annoyed in the early hours of the morning, so I changed the subject. “I’m going to the lake. Where is Freya anyway?” He pointed to a nearby hut and said, “She’s getting ready. She’ll be with me today. I hope you don’t mind if I take her with me.” I asked, “It depends on what you’re going to do.” He explained, “She asked me if I could teach her something more about her element. Even though I’m not the best wind dragon, maybe I could give her some advice that I learned from Cyrus.” That name made me sad again. I asked him, “What happened to Cyrus? Last time you named him, you said he disappeared.” He sighed and said, “After you left, we received a message from the kingdom of the Whispering Wind. Then both Cyrus and Sol departed, but it seems they never made it there.” I asked, “Do you have any idea what might have happened to them?” He shook his head and said, “I don’t know. I can’t make a vision connection with them anymore. So I fear that the worst has happened. And I don’t know how.” He looked really sad after saying that. I could see both fear and sorrow in his eyes. A tear fell to the ground. I said softly, “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t want this to happen because of me.” He wiped away the tear and said bitterly, “It’s not your fault. We should never have let a guardian go on his own again. We should have stuck together like always. What a stupid mistake.”

I asked him, “Do you think you could have saved them?” His voice was bitter as he replied, “With the other guardians, yes. We were unstoppable and invincible. No one, not even the dark lord, could have stood against us. But now we are scattered and broken. Hiding.” I pressed on, “Why? What made you leave the kingdom and come here?” He sighed, “We had to do it for the city’s sake. We are a target for many enemies, and we didn’t want to expose the city to their attacks by staying together. So we parted ways. I came here while the others returned to their own kingdoms, I hope.” I sensed there was more to the story and asked, “Does that mean you were forced to leave?” He avoided my gaze and didn’t answer. I guessed the truth and said, “Did Aura make you go?” He snapped, “No, we made the decision ourselves. We all agreed on it, okay?” I flinched at his outburst and said, “Okay, okay. I’m sorry. Thank you for being honest with me.” He calmed down and said, “Sorry. It’s a sore subject for me.”

At that moment, Freya arrived with some supplies in her arms. She looked like she was ready for a long journey. She greeted us and said, “Oh hi, Nox, how are you?” I replied, “I’m fine, thanks. So, you’re going on a trip?” She smiled and said, “Oh yeah, I am. And these things I'm carrying are just the essentials. Did he tell you about it?” I glanced at Erebus and saw him nod. I said, “Yeah, he did. By accident.” We laughed and then left the village. Siveth told me to meet her at the lake and that she would join me soon. So I headed there by myself, ignoring the sheep and other tempting prey along the way. I still felt full from last night’s feast.

I reached the lake and saw no one there. I waited for a while and then decided to explore the surroundings. There was a cave behind a small waterfall that caught my attention. I went inside and found nothing but some pools of water and some holes that led deeper into the darkness. I didn’t want to risk getting lost in an underwater labyrinth, so I turned back and went outside. I followed the river upstream and discovered some smaller streams branching off and falling into cracks in the ground. Then I heard some noises and realized I wasn’t alone. To avoid any trouble, I jumped into the water and swam back to the lake.

I was enjoying the cool water of the lake when I spotted some Earth Dragons reaching the shore. They were different from me: Siveth, Canine, and Vexus. They had spikes on their tails and bright colors that warned of their venom. I tried to hide behind some rocks, but it was too late. They saw me and called out, “Hey, what are you doing here in our lake?”

I decided to act casual and replied, “That’s none of your business, brother.” I liked to call other Earth Dragons brothers and sisters, even if they were strangers. They didn’t like my answer and swam closer to me. They circled me like sharks and asked, “Who are you?”

I said, “Ehm, I’m new here. It's nice to meet you. I’m Nox.”

The leader of the trio snorted and said, “Oh, a new one around here? Then listen to me carefully. Leave the lake and never come back. This is not your place. Okay?”

I felt a surge of defiance and said, “Sorry, but I can’t leave.”

He laughed and said, “Do you hear that? This guy is trying to tell us that we can’t make him leave our territory. What do you think we should do?”

One of them said, “Let’s tie him to a log and throw him down the river.”

The other one said, “Let’s beat him up and then tie him on a log and throw him down the river.”

The leader nodded and said, “Oh, that’s a good one. We could do that.”

Before they could act on their plan, I attacked. I bit the leader in the neck and dragged him to the bottom of the lake. He groaned but didn’t pass out. My poison was slow on him. His brothers followed me and tried to grab me, but I was faster and dodged them. I waited for them to surface for air. They couldn’t hold their breath as long as I could while in action. When they did, I lunged at one of them, but the other one hit me with his tail. His spikes tore through my chest and left deep wounds that bled underwater. They were also poisoned, which made me weaker. I managed to poison the second one I caught, and he blacked out right away. I held on to his limp body and stared at the last one who was still conscious. I tried to make him understand that if he wanted his friends back, he had to listen to me. He didn’t care and fought me instead. He was stronger than me after I got wounded, and he won. He left me at the bottom of the lake, bleeding from several cuts all over my body. I wished I could shapeshift into something else. But I had eaten too much the day before and couldn’t change my form.

With a swift and powerful move, he dragged his brothers out of the water, unaware of the danger that awaited him. Siveth, the one he should have never crossed paths with, appeared on the shore. I spotted her from the middle of the lake after getting back to the surface, still recovering from the fight. Curious and cautious, I surfaced and eavesdropped on their exchange.

“What are you doing here?” she demanded.

He feigned relief and said, “Oh, Siveth, thank goodness you’re here. Another Earth Dragon ambushed us. We need your help.”

She narrowed her eyes. “Another Earth Dragon? Who was it?”

He lied smoothly. “I don’t know. We’ve never seen him before. He called himself Nox or something.”

She smirked. “Oh, really? I happen to know him. Where is he now?”

I couldn’t hear his answer, but a moment later, I saw all three of them flying through the air like ragdolls and landing with a splash in the water. The third one was also poisoned by Siveth’s venom. I revealed myself to her and said, “Wow, thank you. You just finished what they started.”

She nodded and said, “Yeah, I figured. Did they hurt you or anything?”

I climbed out of the water. I was healing slowly, but she could still see the wounds they had inflicted on me. She said, “Well, it looks like they did. Good job on knocking out two of them.”

I added, “I was about to do the same to the third one, but he poisoned me first. I hate to admit it, but I lost.”

She shrugged. “Pff, no big deal.” Then she asked me what we should do with them, and I had a brilliant idea inspired by their own plan. We did to them what they had intended to do to me: we tied all three of them to a huge log and threw them into the current of the river. They would wake up eventually, but who knows where or when. I laughed and said, “That’s hilarious. Do you think they’ll survive?”

She replied, “Probably. Earth dragons are tough to kill.”

I said, “Sure, but I poisoned them too.”

She explained, “Even if you did, they’re Earth Dragons like you. They won’t die from it. They’ll just wake up sooner or later.”

She turned to me and asked, “So, are we going to wait for them here?” I nodded and said, “Yeah, they should be on their way.” She shrugged and said, “Yeah, sure.” We settled on the shore. She basked in the sun, while I felt like I was melting and stayed in the water to cool off. Then I had a brilliant idea: I made a vision connection with Akira to check on their progress. As usual, she sensed me before I could say anything. “Reveal yourself! I know you’re there,” she said. I said, “Yeah, I know; it’s me, Nox; don’t worry.” She happily said, “Oh hi, Nox, how are you doing?” I said, “I’m fine. Anyway, are you on your way here? How long is it going to take?” She said, “Well, probably another day or two. We’re currently having a break before resuming our flight.” I said, “Oh great, did you already reach the continent?” She said, “Yeah, we’re about to reach the river and get on our way to you.” I said, “Very well, I can’t wait. Have a good flight. The weather here is great today.” She said, “Thank you. Wait, are you wounded?” She was looking through my eyes. I said, “Nah, I’m healing. Just a bit of poison that slows the healing process. I had some company from annoying Earth Dragons, but we took care of them.” She said, “Very well. Then heal and have a good time. Goodbye.” I broke the vision connection after that.

I looked at Siveth and said, “They reached the continent. They’ll be here within two days.” She was resting and enjoying her sunbathing. She replied with annoyance, “Very well.” Then I added, “What do you think if we take back the log? I don’t really want to let them see that.” She said, “Who cares? They’ll just ignore it.” I said, “I’m not sure that they will.” She then said, “Then let’s follow and guide them to the next river bifurcation.” She jumped into the water and moved forward. We soon reached the log, with all three of them still tied and quite beaten up by me. They were still alive but unable to talk or move anything. They were paralyzed. We diverted the log and guided it all the way to the bifurcation. There she said, “I’ll let you choose. That one is where your friends will probably come from, so I’d avoid that. That one goes all the way to the ocean and also has a waterfall. The last one is just a river with nothing special in it. Which one do you choose?” I said, “I’d rather not get marked as a murderer, so I’ll pick the third one.” She really wished for me to pick the second one, so she said, “Alright. You’re too good. Are you sure?” I said, “Yeah. I’m sure.” She then added, “That river has the strongest flow. They’ll probably make it to the ocean by tomorrow. The other one has just a waterfall, and then it’s all a slow and long river. Are you still sure?” I said, “Yeah. They have better chances of surviving in the ocean than falling down a waterfall. Thank you.” She said, “Very well. As you wish.” And we let go of the log with the three earth dragons down the third river.

We dragged them along the log, laughing at their helpless state. I turned to her and asked if she knew them. She nodded and said she hated them. Then she added in a low voice, “I might have killed one of their brothers once. It was a long time ago.” I gasped and said, “What? Really?” She nodded again and said, “Yeah, he attacked me when I was young. He was bigger and stronger, but I fought back and won.” I asked, “So it was self-defense?” She shrugged and said, “Yeah, I had no choice.” I didn’t know what to say. Then she said, “I snapped his spine at the neck. He died quickly.” I shuddered and said, “You didn’t have to tell me that. I wish I didn’t know that.” She said, “I did it the same way I did it to you the first time.” I cut her off and said, “Stop it. Stop talking about that. You don’t know how much it hurt.” She said, “That’s how I deal with anyone who tries to harm me or cross me. It’s my signature move.” I tried to ignore her, but her words still echoed in my ears. So I said, “How would you like it if I did that to you? You know, it’s a once-in-a-lifetime experience, since you’re so proud of it.” She smirked and said, “Good luck with that.” I said, “Oh wait, I could also heal you afterwards and make you feel all the pain. That’s even worse.” She frowned and said, “Ha ha, no thanks. Okay, okay, I’m sorry. Please forgive me for that.” I said, “I’ll forgive you only if you teach me how to do it.” She said, “How can I teach you that? We don’t have another… oh…”

Our target was an Earth Dragon, dormant and oblivious to our presence tied to the log. We intended to inflict no harm on it, only to practice a technique that I could heal afterwards. We steered the log towards the shore, where I spotted the one who seemed to be their leader. I pointed at him and said, “Let’s use him.” She nodded and said, “As you wish.” She lifted him up and demonstrated how to position herself behind his neck. I followed her example, but he was slippery, so I dried him off and tried again. I asked, “Like this?” She said, “Yes, but be careful. If you do it wrong, you could break your own bones.” I felt a surge of tension in my body as I prepared to strike. She asked, “Are you sure you want to do this? Or are you satisfied with just learning the theory?” I hesitated for a moment, then said, “Well, we’re already here, so...” I bit him lightly with some poison to make sure he was still unconscious and felt nothing. He didn’t react, but I waited a few minutes anyway. Then I snapped his neck with a loud crack. I gasped and let go of him, quickly healing him. A cloud of white smoke enveloped us. He was alive, but that was a horrible experience, even if he was not aware of it. Siveth said, “Congratulations. You are the only one besides me who knows this technique. Please keep it a secret. I don’t want to see Earth Dragons going around breaking each other’s spines like this. It should be my exclusive skill.” I added, “And mine too, eheh.” She glared at me and said, “I’m not joking.” I said, “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone. Thank you for teaching me. You are a good teacher.” She said, “You’re welcome. Now let’s put them back in the water, shall we?” I said, “Of course, ahah.” We tied him back to the log with the others and let them drift away. We followed them for a while longer. We had nothing else to do. Then she said, “It’s getting late. We should head back now. Otherwise, we won’t make it before nightfall.” I agreed, and we turned around. We reached our camp before dark. Erebus and Freya were still away on their mission. They had taken so much stuff with them that it looked like they planned to stay for days. I spent the evening with Siveth and his brothers. Then I went to sleep in my hammock, alone this time. I felt empty and reverted to my original form. It was strange to sleep like this again. I was smaller, and Freya was not by my side. Oh, how I missed her already.

[reincarnatedonthefirst]

My appointment with Sigma was okay. I had the place clean and smelling nice for him. But I have a few different feelings about how the appointment went (prepare for a long post)…

I think he is in the honeymoon stage of our relationship. He is trying to impress me, making subtle hints about spoiling me. Asks me a lot of questions, some of which are personal. It’s very flattering. I’m getting a little annoyed at him hinting at spoiling me, though. I actually think he might be one of those clients that, if you make them jealous, it will actually motivate them to give you more. I wonder…

I also made the mistake of not asking how much time he wanted today. When I confirmed our appointment yesterday, I mistakenly implied that I only had an hour available for him. I’ll never do that again. He ended up booking me for 90 minutes today, though. Hopefully, he settles for 2 hours next time. I fcked that up.

Anyway, we talked a lot… Too much in fact. I like to give clients at least two “pops” per session but we talked so much that we didn’t go a second round and I didn’t give him oral (and he really likes oral). But it’s not his fault. I need to get better at taking initiative during sessions. I am the provider after all. I regret not doing that.

He also asked me a lot about my dating life and my professional life as an escort. This is where I, once again, have regrets…

Because I have this idea that I need to impress clients so, when talking to my clients, I often make up stories about having wealthy clients and/or wealthy boyfriends.

Now, I don’t think there is anything wrong with making up stories to convince paying clients that you’re “high value”. The problem with me is that I don’t enjoy lying! It actually feels bad. Granted, in our society, it is sometimes necessary to lie. But I don’t like lying unnecessarily. It leaves me feeling rotten on the inside. I don’t enjoy making up stories or pretending to be someone I’m not even when it means I can gain financially. I love for people to know the real me (as you can probably tell from my very honest Tumblr posts where I often talk about my bowel movements). I’m one of those people that “wears their heart on their sleeves”. I’m mainly open-book. I’m truthful about my life experience and more positive aspects of myself but I also don’t embellish.

Which leads me to another point: I over-share with clients…

I’m sure clients would like to see me as some kind of unattainable goddess but because I prefer to be honest, it’s difficult for me to maintain that vision for them. I’m afraid that eventually, they’ll discover that I’m actually smarter than they are, I hate men, I’m highly capable, and I have more social consciousness than they are comfortable with. I just can’t maintain an image of being super feminine and intellectually inferior as they’d prefer I be. I’m afraid that my honesty is going to shatter the image they would like to have of me.

Anyway, back to the session…

Now, I will say that the sex today, though it didn’t last long, was good. We had a lot of chemistry. After some foreplay, I rode his pee-nuss like a champ and he came quick.

While we were talking, he also gave me a fun, useful piece of information. He said that he once went to see a fetish provider that does prostate massages. He said that cumming from a prostate massage is one hundred times better than cumming from vaginal penetration. He said that the provider he saw charges $1,100 per hour for her services and she doesn’t even offer penetration. 😐 … Bro…

I asked if she used a toy to reach his prostate and he said she uses her finger. I, then, asked if the session was worth $1,100 and he said, “absolutely”.

::snaps on a pair of surgical gloves:: Bro, point me to the nearest ass hole. Where is it….

I need to learn prostate massage. It’s a fcking must…

He sked why I was interested in prostate massage. I didn’t want to sound like a money-grubber so I came up up some BS reason and told him I like being in control. The truth is that I want to learn a speciality services because I can make good money off of it.

Anyway, he wants to schedule an appointment with me next Friday as well (YAY!). I hope he books for two hours this time. Sigma isn’t rich, I don’t think. But based on his hobbies, I can tell that he’s got a decent amount of disposable income. He also said he barely has any debt. The point is that, when it comes to him, I need to not “fumble the bag” as they say on social media. He wants to stick with me and he can afford to do so.

Another thing - I forgot to offer him water when he came over. I actually had a bottle in the refrigerator just for him. 🙄 Before he comes over next week, I also want to ask if there are any snacks I can keep here for him. The first time we met, he said he wants his provider’s place to be his “sanctuary” and I heard that loud and clear.

I guess I enjoy the customer service aspect of this all. I’m offering a “luxury” service, a service that most people cannot afford so I’m enjoying the process of creating an “experience”. I was even excited to take all of the linen off the bed and wash it clean for his next visit. 😂

I guess that’s all for now. I find Sigma attractive and I genuinely like him. He’s a successful, grown-ass man. He’s confident, kind, and he’s emotionally intelligent. I think we make a great pair. Today, he actually said, “you’re perfect for me”.

Anyway, let’s hope he is as “generous” as he claims, though.

[moveslikebucky]

WIP Wednesday

Hello everyone today I am sharing a tiny bit from the FINAL CHAPTER of me and @ouidamforeman's "Night of the Living Boyfriend!"

Yes, that's right, I have still been working on this fic and I am very pleased to say the drafting and writing is FINISHED. The first beta run through the last chapter and the epilogue is done, now it's just polishing and you should see it in your subscription emails very soon (if you're subscribed to me or it, that is xD)

For now! Have a little bit of a bittersweet interaction between Aziraphale and Anathema:

“Are you ready to do this?” She asked him for what felt like the hundredth time. “Yes, absolutely,” Aziraphale said, swallowing hard.  “I love him. Asmodeus can’t have him.” Anathema’s face betrayed a small and knowing smile.  “Right, everything is here.  Everything is ready.”  She passed him a small tote bag.  “You’ll need to get the stick from a tree on your way to the house, it has to be fresh.  But your salt, candles, all of the rest is there.” Aziraphale took a deep breath, cursing himself for how shaky it was.  “Thank you, for everything.” “What will you do next?  Bringing someone back from the brink of death… who’s been gone for this long…” She shook her head, “How will you explain it?” “I’ll figure that out when I get to it.” Anathema furrowed her brow.  “Why do I have a feeling I won’t be seeing you again?” “Well that’s just silly,” Aziraphale said, wrapping her in a friendly hug, “You’re my best friend, can’t get rid of me that easily.” “Yeah, silly of me,” Anathema said into his shoulder, though he couldn’t miss the way her voice cracked.  “You just be careful, and bring your man home.” “I’ll do my best.”   “And remember,” Anathema said when they parted, “Be firm and direct, state things clearly and concisely.  Demons are used to bartering deals, they’ll take a mile if you give them an inch.  Be clear and firm with what you want, or you might end up with the same fate as Crowley.” “I will, I know what to say.”

[spywitch]

Sometimes I feel like I have a hard time making friends bc its hard for me to care about their lives , but then I’m like why do I think that… Because I don’t think I’ve ALWAYS felt that way about people and like in the past I often have a pretty good memory and attention to the details of things other ppl tell me about themselves.

I feel so much more exausted with talking to other people and focusing on their life and their needs than I used to and like. I think some part of it is I’m so used to people just literally never telling me anything thats going on with them so I feel invisible and forgotten about… so the idea of trying to get to know someone else’s life sounds exausting bc I always have to pry that information from people, and it makes me annoyed to put that effort in bc I know they won’t care about me and my life or remember things I tell them anyway.

And like I always think maybe people don’t tell me about themselves because they don’t like how I respond, because it doesn’t come naturally to me to just respond with emotions (for example, getting excited with someone, or upset with someone) and instead I usually have a somewhat flat “good for you” response or my rational observations/opinions of the situation. Or I might have trouble focusing on what they said at all and change the subject to myself but I try really hard not to do that, at least not until what they said has been acknowledged.

I’ve also learned I guess that other people expect to be Asked to share about themselves. Which like yeah I get that being asked about your life feels good and shows the person cares… but it feels like other people see things like you need permission to share a story or talk about something you care about which I just find odd. Like my mom once told me she was upset I never ask her about work or anything, but in my mind I was just like? You never talk about work, I didn’t know you WANTED to talk about work. You can just talk about work/your life, you don’t need me to give you permission, just like I just talk about my work. I also realized from someone else talking about going from being the “mature kid who always talks to the adults” to feeling childish as an adult, that I’m probably struggling to adapt to like, adult to adult conversations vs adult to child… bc when you’re a kid thats how conversations with adults go, you just get asked about your day at school and aren’t expected to ask the adult about their day 😂

Like idk, I’ve had friends and stuff, and continue to experience this even now tbh, who would always forget to tell me important things (I broke up with/got back together with my boyfriend, I’ll be out of town next week, I’m buying my new puppy that ur literally gonna have to live with in a couple months, etc). They’ll even often be confused that I don’t know about the thing they didn’t tell me about, like it just constantly slips people’s mind that they haven’t actually been talking to me about anything.

Or I’ll have friendships that seem to fizzle into them making 0 effort, so I’ll even try my best to ask how THEY are and about their life and still get little response or attempt at making conversations with it. Like sometimes it feels like even if I reach the realization that I maybe have been talking about myself too much, its too late and nothing I do afterwards to try to improve that will get them to share about themselves with me… and then it feels the only way we can keep a conversation going at all is if I ramble about something.

Like idk maaaaan I’ve always had limited friends but in the past it just felt like it was because I was anxious to meet new ppl, but now its like that COMBINED with just everyday conversation even with ppl I already know being exausting, and attempting to figure out a new person and how They converse and what they respond well to or not is so tiresome. And as a kid it was like “I’m worried I’m weird/annoying” but now its more like uhh I feel like I completely can’t relate to most other adults and like I’ve missed some huge social developments between high school and college and I’m just some big Child amongst a bunch of grown ass ppl with grown ass relationships where ppl are on equal footing with each other.

[erin-bo-berin]

Hiya! I’m so sorry if this is a repeat ask—Tumblr didn’t seem to submit when I tried just now oops! not sure whether your requests are open (your fics have been INCREDIBLE lately) or if you’d be into it but! I’d love to see a story where Steve’s finally convinced you to try for a baby and you’ve been trying for a few months. Steve thinks you’re pregnant bc he’s picking up on what he thinks are “signs” (morning sickness, you have to pee constantly, your boobs are suddenly swollen and you’re craving foods you normally hate) but reader’s worried if it’s not true they’ll both be disappointed, and is stubbornly denying all of it, to Steve’s total exasperation.

On the morning when your jeans refuse to button, Steve finally forces you to take a test (of course he secretly bought one weeks ago). Turns out Steve might know your body even better than you do…

Oh thank you for resubmitting it cause I definitely didn’t get it the first time!

But I love this idea. It’s insane, I’ve actually heard of many cases where the husband/boyfriend has been able to tell before the woman that they’re pregnant and it just floors me! There was one guy that was POSITIVE when his wife first found out she was pregnant that they were going to have twins, both girls and he told her that which she just laughed off, but he said he just had a feeling in his gut. What do you know? They ended up having twins. Both girls. It’s WILD to me.

They say there’s woman’s/mother’s intuition but I wonder if there’s father’s intuition too.

Anyways, the gif I immediately thought of was the sassy one where he sits and crosses his legs after telling Dustin to be humble sometimes lol so yes I gotta use that for this. This will be its own fic by the way! (Also, I didn’t know if you wanted smut included in it but since you didn’t specify, I’ll keep it clean and just do the fluff and snarky Steve 😂)

Steve Knows Best

Steve Harrington x Reader

Warnings: Nothing really, but pregnancy, pregnancy symptoms, throwing up, just in case that’s not your thing

Mornings are usually your least favorite time of day. Honestly, who wants to leave a nice comfy bed to do things?

But lately, mornings have sucked even more for you. You’ve dealt with some bad nausea the last two weeks or so, but nothing terrible. It wasn’t until a few mornings ago that it was bad enough to wrench you from your sleep and to the toilet.

Here you were again, on your knees, not even six a.m. in the morning, stomach heaving. You’re sure you must’ve come down with a bug or something. One of the kids had been sick lately and you’d taken them some food to cheer them up and could’ve caught what they had during your visit.

You didn’t know which was worse, the puking or the constant nausea that seemed to plague you the rest of the day. Even if you got it all out of your system that morning, you spent the rest of the day with bad enough queasiness that you almost wished you would throw up, just so you’d feel better.

Figuring you were done, you flushed the toilet, wiping your mouth before carefully proceeding to brush your teeth. The last thing you needed was to set yourself off again.

By the time you padded back into the bedroom, breath fresh again, you saw Steve laying there, head propped up in his hand, watching the bathroom door and waiting for your return.

“Damnit,” you mumbled, hoping you hadn’t woken your boyfriend, “How long have you been awake?”

“Long enough,” he said, pulling you towards him, running your back, “Did you get sick again?”

You rested your head next to his on the pillow, facing him and nodded.

“I’m sorry, baby,” he kissed your head, smoothing stray pieces of hair that had escaped your ponytail, off your forehead, “You don’t feel warm.”

“It could’ve been something I’ve eaten,” you replied, shrugging.

“Going on a week?” he asked, skeptically.

“Maybe I caught what Dustin had,” you answered, “Remember he was sick last week and I visited him with some food and comics?”

“Y/N,” he gave you a knowing look, “He had a cold.”

“Well, germs are germs,” you huffed.

“Baby.”

By his look you were almost sure you knew what he was going to say.

“I still think you could be pregnant.”

And you were right. You sighed, exasperated.

“I’m not pregnant, Steve.”

It’d only been three months since Steve had convinced you to start trying for a baby. You’d kinda just wanted to let things happen as they happen, but Steve wanted to actively try. You weren’t opposed to the idea, especially since it meant sex with him, but the idea still scared you. Not having a baby per se, but actively trying to conceive. You’d seen plenty of couples purposely try, only to be upset month after month when it didn’t happen.

You didn’t want to be disappointed if a test came back negative. You didn’t want Steve to be disappointed, you couldn’t and refused to do that to him. Besides, you’d still been getting your period and that was sign enough that you weren’t pregnant.

“How do you know? You haven’t taken a test.”

“I just had my period, besides I’ve only thrown up three times. I don’t think that constitutes as being pregnant,” you retorted.

“Haven’t you said you’ve been peeing like crazy?”

“So? I’ve been drinking a lot of water. Water makes you pee, Steve,” you said.

You could tell he wasn’t convinced. He pulled you into his arms, your back pressed against his chest as his hands traced lazy patterns of the exposed skin where your shirt had ridden up.

“Do you not want to be pregnant? Is that it?”

You could hear a tinge of hurt in his voice and you frowned, hating yourself for making him think like that.

“It’s not that, I promise, Steve,” you laced your fingers with his, bringing his hand up to your mouth to kiss it, “I just really don’t think I’m pregnant.”

“Then explain your boobs.”

His statement was so random that it caused a bubble of laughter to escape your lips.

“What about them?”

“They’re huge,” he said bluntly.

You looked down, frowning contemplatively. You’d noticed they were a bit tender lately, but didn’t really look any bigger than you were used to.

“Again, probably cause my period. How did you notice anyway?”

You turned to face him, amused and curious for his answer.

“The last time we had sex. I mean it’s kinda hard to ignore such treasure when you’re in certain…positions,” he smirked.

It’d been about two weeks since you two had last been intimate because of you not feeling well lately.

“You’re exaggerating,” you laughed.

“Like I said, you’re pregnant. You just don’t want to admit it.”

You knew better than to argue with him.

“Whatever you say, Steve.”

•

“Dude, is she okay?”

“Do you not feed her or something?”

Steve gave Dustin and Robin both an unamused look at their questions.

Everyone else had plans for the day, but you, Steve and Robin had ventured out to the mall in the next town over. It was the closest mall to Hawkins after the one in town had been demolished years earlier.

You sat in the food court with your boyfriend and Steve, thoroughly enjoying your cheeseburger and fries. You’re not sure why you felt so hungry today, but you’d take that a million times over feeling nauseous, so you took it as a sign that you’d finally kicked the lingering bits of the bug you’d had.

“I can hear you two, you know,” you grumbled, eating a fry, “I was just really hungry for a cheeseburger I guess.”

You spotted pickles set aside on Dustin’s burger tray, tomato on Robin’s.

“Are you guys going to eat your pickles? Or tomatoes?” you asked, motioning to them.

They shook their heads, sliding the tray over yo you where you collected the food, popping them into your mouth happily. You could’ve laughed at the varying looks on their faces at that moment.

Robin looked horrified.

Dustin looked confused.

Steve looked…amused?

“What?” you asked, tired of them gawking at you.

“You hate pickles,” Robin said.

“And tomatoes?” Dustin said, although it came out as a question; his statement was as confused as his expression was.

“Maybe my tastes have changed,” you shrugged, “They just sounded really good right now.”

Steve gave you a knowing look and once again, you shook your head adamantly.

“No,” you said.

The other two looked between you, trying to follow.

“What? What’s this? What’s going on?” Robin asked, motioning between you two, indicating the silent conversation you and Steve were having in shared looks.

“Y/N’s pregnant.”

“What?!” Dustin exclaimed.

“She is?!” Robin yelped.

“I’m gonna be an uncle?” Dustin beamed.

“And I’m gonna be an aunt?” Robin smiled.

“No one’s going to be anything!” you said, trying to calm them down, “At least not at the moment.”

“But Steve just said—”

You cut Dustin off mid-sentence.

“Yes, I know what he just said. But I’m not pregnant. Steve just thinks I am.”

Robin looked at Steve with a raised brow, “Explain, please.”

“She’s having all these signs,” he waved his hands in mid-air as if that would explain it.

“What kind of signs?” Dustin questioned.

“She’s been nauseous and has thrown up several times,” Steve ticked off on one finger.

“Which I told him was just a bug,” you countered, “I must’ve gotten sick from when I visited you when you were sick, Dustin.”

“I had a cold,” he deadpanned.

“Semantics!” you exclaimed.

“She has to pee every five seconds,” Steve ticked off on another finger.

“I drink a lot of water,” you rolled your eyes.

“Okay, that’s a reasonable excuse,” Dustin nodded.

“Her boobs have gotten huge,” Steve added, ticking off a third finger.

“Your boobs do look really nice lately,” Robin nodded.

“Right?” Steve said.

“Okay, this is ridiculous. I’ve told him a million times I’m not pregnant,” you said.

“Then there’s this,” Steve motioned to you and the food in front of you.

“What? That I’m enjoying a burger?”

“Like you haven’t eaten in three years,” Dustin said.

“And eating pickles,” Robin added.

“And tomatoes,” Steve finished.

“You guys are losing it,” you shook your head, “I think I’d know my body better than that.”

“Okay, whatever you say,” Robin said, sharing a look you couldn’t decipher with Steve.

He still had that determined, all knowing look in his eyes. The one that sparked the flint of doubt you were having deep down in your gut. The one truth that you refused to admit.

•

The final straw came one morning, not even a full week after the incident at the food court. It’d been about a full month since the nausea started and though you hadn’t been having symptoms like that in a while, Steve was still adamant.

He didn’t bother you about it, but you knew he was itching to prove you right. You couldn’t help but find yourself wishing he was right, but you just weren’t ready for that disappointment if he was wrong. The fact that your period had shown up last month made you feel like disappointment was a big possibility.

You were getting ready to tag along with Steve and the gang to hang out. You were finishing getting dressed when you hit a snag in your morning routine. Your favorite pair of jeans were feeling a bit more snug than you remembered them being. Granted, you’d been eating a bit more than usual, but it was a little odd.

Of course, Steve walked in the bedroom in the middle of your struggle.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, watching you try your hardest to pull the two sides of your jeans together, to get the button in.

“I can’t get my jeans buttoned,” you groaned.

His brows rose, clearly amused but he walked over, offering to try to button them for you. When that didn’t work, he looked at you.

“Still don’t believe there isn’t a chance you’re pregnant?” Steve asked, crossing his arms, smiling at you.

You sighed, tired of fighting the curiosity, the doubt and the fear. So, you gave in and decided you’d take a test.

“So, should we pick up a test while we’re out today?” you smiled.

“No need. I already got one.”

He dropped his arms, already heading to the bathroom.

“You…what?” you laughed, not sure you’d heard correctly.

He pulled a sack out from the cabinet under the bathroom sink and pulled out a small box which was in fact a pregnancy test.

“How long have you had this?” you asked, amazed he’d thought of getting one already.

“About a month ago,” he smiled sheepishly.

You laughed, shaking your head and kissed his cheek.

“Oh, Steve. I love you.”

“I love you too,” he smiled, “Now take it.”

He handed you the box.

“Do you want me to stay in here or wait in the bedroom?”

“Go wait in the bedroom. I’d be too nervous to pee with you staring at me.”

He grinned, giving you a kiss, “Fair enough.”

After reading the directions, you took the test and set it on the counter and went to wait with Steve.

“What if you’re wrong?” you asked, wringing your hands with anxiety.

“I’m not,” he answered, sure of himself.

When the time was up, you went to get the test and you couldn’t believe what you saw. You showed Steve and his look of excitement met yours of baffled joy.

“How did you know?!”

He just answered you with a sassy, knowing look and a raise of his eyebrows.

Turned out, Steve did happen to know your body better than you did.

[starsscribble]

Stick Shift

Summary: Rick thinks he freeing Y/n. Y/n thinks she's the problem.

Tags: Angst, No comfort, Age Difference, Reader is 25 Rick is in in 40.

A/n: This was when I was on my Walking Dead kick. Finally got it edited.

But today I drove through the suburbs

Crying 'cause you weren't around

  You pulled into the post-apocalyptic suburbs; in a separate car than what Glenn and you left in. Your earlier pride of find and driving said care was gone. Now in it place was a numb type of sadness. It was stupid. You know that. Getting worked up over the fact you were driving a stick shift. All on your own. But Rick. Your boyfriend; ex-boyfriend now. He had been the one to teach you how to drive a stick shift. Before Virginia. When the group was still in the prison. When you were both still happy.

  “Come on,” his southern drawl was clear as day. You let out a puff of air. Head pushing against the headrest. “This was your idea. You gotta confess something.” You started to hate that you suggested this game, but the drive was so damn long. You didn’t have the radio to help distract you. No, it was just you, Rick, and a long stretch of Georgia backroad. The former sheriff’s right hand shifted off the steering wheel. Moving carefully as not to catch your attention. You were still racking your brain for a secret to tell. Then a yelp left your mouth. You jumped in your seat making the older man laugh. Hand retreated to the wheel.

“That’s what you get for taking so long pumpkin.” He grinned; eyes shifted from the road onto you. A hint of playfulness in those ocean blue eyes. 

“I was thinking of something!” You shot back making him chuckle before looking back to the road. 

“There’s gotta be something you have never told anyone.”

“Well,” you hummed. Readjusting in your seat. “I don’t know if this would count because I’ve never told this to anyone in the group.”

“I’ll count it.” He glances at you quickly, still smiling. Which makes you smile.

“Alright. I don’t know how to drive a stick shift.” You feel the jerk was the car spot. Rick looked at you as if you just told him the undead are all gone. Eye full of disbelief. 

“You’re joking.” He speaks after a beat and you shake your head. Nope, you couldn’t drive a stick to save your life. And with how the world was it just might. Rick took off his seatbelt as you questioned just what he was doing. “I’m gonna teach you how to drive stick. You might need it.”

“We are on a run.”

“Yep and this is the perfect time. Now get into the driver’s seat.”

  Slowly you parked next to Glenn. Killing the engine you got out as Glenn moved over to your vehicle. He smiled at you. Today was a good day. Got more food, medicine, and another car. The possibilities for cars were endless. Used for parts. Set up at protection. Used as traps. Daryl Dixon the town resident mechanic would have a field day with this car.

“I’m gonna check in with Rick,” Glenn says. You see him playing with his wedding band. Maggie’s baby bump had started to show and Glenn didn’t like being away for too long. Patting his shoulder you speak.

“Go see Maggie and your baby.” You slammed the driver’s side door shut. The dark-haired man stares at you. Willing to argue with you on this.

“Really it’s-” You raised your hand stopping him.

“If you don’t go check up on Maggie. I will and I’ll tell her how you screamed like a girl.” His eyes widen at the threat. 

“I didn’t know a group of bats would be in there!” He defended himself only making you grin at him. You both head away from the parking area. Back towards the stretch of cookie-cutter homes. You nudge his shoulder with yours.

“First it’s a colony of bats. Second, not only was the scream funny, so was your face.” You teased him. Glenn shoved your shoulder playfully. Before mumbling that he was going to check in with his wife. Leaving you with the task of checking in with the community’s newly appointed leader Rick. 

  Jogging onto his porch you knocked on the door. Eyes looking everywhere but the door until it opened. Sadly it wasn’t the male you were looking for. Carl greeted you with a soft smile. The bandages that once covered his right eye socket had been replaced with a custom-made eyepatch.

“Ahoy captain.” You tease the teenager who rolled his remaining eye. “Your dad here? Just checking in since Glenn and I got back.”

“Nope. Haven’t seen him since this morning.” Carl tells you, making you nodded. “When I see him…” He trails off because he knows you will just hunt his dad down. “I don’t know where he is.” He's lying. You know it. He knows that you know. But you just nod and quickly thank him. Tell him to kiss his sister for you before turning off the porch.

  And you're probably with that blonde girl

Who always made me doubt

She's so much older than me

She's everything I'm insecure about

  You know where Rick Grimes is. Feet carrying you down the still blood-stained street. Streets that just weeks ago were covered with the undead. You wave kindly to the people passing by. It is a mix of your group, older residents, and new people. You still feel out of place. Maybe you always will. Maybe you won't. You wonder quietly to yourself. A nice distraction. Because if you thought about where you were going. Where you had to go. You might just break. So you let your mind wander. Let your feet carry you to the destination. Everything seemed to be on autopilot. Until your using the knocker of the baby blue house. Her house.

“We should end this,” Rick says matter-of-factly. You stopped brushing your hair to look at him. He’s not facing you. Back facing you as he pulled his jeans on. 

“What?” Maybe you misheard him. Maybe it was your ear playing a trick on you. Because Rick couldn’t be breaking up with you right now.

“We should break up.” He rephrases. The words take the air from your lungs. Your mouth opened to say words that your mind can’t even come up with. The silence in the room grew by the seconds. It finally became too much for the man as he turned to face you. Jeans zipped up but not buttoned. Belt lay next to his shirt on the bed but his eyes fell on you instead. 

“Say something.” He requested of you softly. That same soft voice that he used when he said he loved you. Tears that formed in your eyes finally fell as you blinked. Once. Twice. Three times. Before you looked him in the eyes.

“Is it me? Did I do something wrong?” Getting shot was nothing compared to your question to him. Because he knew you honestly thought you did something wrong. You always doubted yourself. But you were perfect. So goddamn perfect. And amazing. And young. 

“No sweetheart. It’s just…” He stops himself from going over to embrace you. Tell you to forget about it. Because this has to happen. You're 24. His 39. Even if the group. His and your family were ok with it. He heard the whispers around town. The other weren’t as supportive. 

“I think we should end this. We had an amazing run. And you're young. You’re gonna find someone else that will love you more than I ever could.” He breaks his own heart with his words. Because he doesn’t want you to find someone else. He wants to be with you until the end. When and where ever the end was. But you deserve better. You deserve someone around your age. Not an old man with two children like him. 

“I…” you stare at him. Cheeks strained with tears he caused. “I don’t want someone else.” You grab the comforter. It gets balled up as you tighten your grip on the fabric. Your mind running over everything you had done in the last weeks to get to the point. You had snapped at him a few days back because of Jessie Anderson. The blonde woman in her thirties that lived up the street. You didn’t hear what they were talking but her body language told you everything. She was flirting with Rick. And either he didn’t notice or didn’t care. Doubt played in your mind the whole day after seeing the interaction. Because Jessie was around Rick’s age. And you weren’t. You didn’t really have any life experience before the world ended. So it made sense if Rick preferred a woman his own age. As opposed to you, a 24-year-old kid in his eyes.

“I can get you a brownstone to stay in.” He said. Brushing off your comment. Which broke your heart even more.

  The door opened showing the blonde that lived there. A smile and questioning look on her face. 

“Is Rick here?” You asked, watching as she turned her head and yelling the man’s name into the home. He comes out from the kitchen; questioning who it was. The question dying in his throat when he saw it was you. Jessie excused herself leaving you and Rick alone. The former sheriff stepped onto the porch, closing the door behind him.

“Hey,” he gives you a tight-lipped smile. Which you return.

“Just came to tell you Glenn and I are back.”

“Right,” he nods. “You guys went on a run. Get anything good?” You nodded before listing off some of the supplies you got. Including the stick shift car. You heard him chuckle. Looking into his eyes you saw that same playfulness as the day he first forced you to drive a stick. 

“You didn’t flood the engine this time right?” He teased and you scoffed, punching him in the shoulder. 

“I was amazing.” You boasted. The older man stared at you and you swear you heard a quiet. ‘Ya, you are.’ 

“You don’t mind if I asked Glenn?” You roll your eyes but smile.

“Go ahead. He's gonna tell you the same thing.” He nodded. Hand going on his hips. You watch as he licks his lips. Your breath hitching as you feel your stomach twisting in knots. “I should go. Need a shower desperately.” You don’t wait for him to say goodbye or stop you. You're off the porch and down the road heading home in a few steps. 

  And all my friends are tired

Of hearing how much I miss you, but

I kinda feel sorry for them

'Cause they'll never know you the way that I do

  Maggie can’t drink. But that doesn’t mean you and Sasha can’t. Sasha, Abraham, and Rosita had come back later in the day from another run. They had been the unlucky ones not finding much of anything. But Sasha apparently found some top-tier booze in a rundown bar. The trio split it up between them. So here you were. Snacking on fresh strawberries drinking booze that would have been at least $100 for a bottle; straight out of the bottle. The three of you resting against the metal wall that protected the town from the nasty world outside.

“So,” Maggie started as she threw a strawberry stem into a bowl filled with them. “Heard someone talk with Rick.” Sasha and her eyes went to you as you grabbed the glass bottle of auburn liquid. Taking a healthy swig you felt the burn as it went down. You were far too sober to be talking about this. Talking about him. Because no one in the group knew why you guys ended it. Just one day you were a happy couple and the next you were packing up and moving into your own brownstone. Sasha took the bottle from you, making you whine. As you tried to reach for it but the former firefighter held it out of reach. Her hand on your chest also keeping you away from it.

“You can get some when you tell us what happened.” She landed down the rule and it makes you groan as you move to lay against the wall. You don't want to talk about it. You just want to wallow and let the scar form on your heart in peace.

A crack of thunder sends the trio onto the back porch of Maggie’s home. Lucky for you guys because moments after; the dark clouds opened up letting down heavy droplets that ping off the porch’s roof. Sasha is distracted by the rain. Asking Maggie if the crops will be ok. Allowing you to snatch the bottle from her hand and take another big glug. The bottle is half gone now. And honestly so are you. The alcohol works fast as your brain starts to go fuzzy. Sasha takes the bottle back slightly annoyed. But it clear the break-up has been hard. So she lets it go.

“You got your drink.” She says putting the cap back on and sitting it to the side out of your reach. “Now tell us what happened.”

“I don’t know.” You sob. You weren’t normally an emotional drunk. But with everything going on with Rick. Tonight you were. 

  And I know we weren't perfect

But I've never felt this way for no one, oh

And I just can't imagine how you could be so okay, now that I'm gone

  Maggie held you as you drunkenly cried. Sasha joined you on the other side, rubbing your back. You finally opened up about your breakup with Rick a month ago. You weren’t sure how much they understood because of the loud rain and your blubbering. But either way, they consoled you. Trying to help the only way they could. And the only way they knew how. Simply being there. Because for a month you kept this end. Kept this to yourself. So those outside of the group saw you were fine. The break-up didn’t seem to affect you. You carried on with work. Talked with Rick when it was needed. You acted fine. 

But the group knew it. Of course, they knew. It was an act. Because they saw how you were breaking. How you had a longing in your eyes when the cowboy boots-wearing man walked by. The smile that rarely reached your lips. You were faking so much of your joy because your heart was broken. 

“I just don’t get how he is so ok. Did I mean nothing?” The two women share a look at your question. Because they also know that Rick isn’t ok. Like you, he is acting. Because he is the leader and can’t break down. But the man isn’t ok. They don’t say that. Rick was the one that ended it. That was on him.

“I don’t know,” Maggie says softly as you rest your head onto her shoulder. “I wish I had the answer for you. But only Rick does.”

  Red lights, stop signs

I still see your face in the white cars, front yards

Can't drive past the places we used to go to

'Cause I still fuckin' love you, babe

  The street lights are now on. It’s still raining when you tell Maggie you were going home. Sasha and her try to get you to stay the night. Or at least until the rain lets up. But the rain isn't letting up. It was so heavy you could barely see a few steps in front of you. But you step off the back porch and disappear down the alleyway of the lined-up homes. You walk. Just walk because you don’t want to go home just yet. If you go home you’ll be lonely. And you don’t want that. Because for a month you have been lonely in that damn brownstone. Rick wasn’t lonely. He was with Jessie. His arms wrapped around her body. Damn your brain. Just because you didn’t want to be lonely didn’t mean you wanted to think about them together. 

  The rain started to ease up as you found yourself passing Rick’s house. The lights upstairs were on. As you quickly looked away from the cookie-cutter home. A shiver ran through you and shoved your hands into your soaked jean pockets. Maybe now was a good time to head home. You haven’t even turned when you heard your name being shouted over the rain. Looking back at Rick’s home you see him rushing off the porch and over to you. His dark brown jacket acting as an umbrella. He puts it mostly over you shielding you from the rain.

“What are you doing out here? You're going to get sick.” He frets because he knows how likely that is. Because after the rainstorm when the group was on the trek through Virginia you had gotten sick. “Come on.” He orders and you walk with him toward his house. 

  Sidewalks we crossed

I still hear your voice in the traffic, we're laughing

Over all the noise

  You smile at him lightly as he places a cup of peppermint tea in your hand; you're favorite. You're in one of his white t-shirt and pajama pants. Your hair, no longer wet from the rain but a hot shower. The alcohol is still in your system. How much you don’t know. 

“What were you doing walking in the rain?” He questioned taking the seat next to you. His own cup of tea in his hand.

“Was drinking with Sasha and Maggie.” You look towards him as his eyebrows knit together as the mention of Maggie and drinking. “Maggie was moderating us. She wasn’t drinking, come on. She knows better.” Rick nods bowing his head because he does know better to think that about Maggie. But his time as a cop taught him that some people just don’t care. Not about themselves. Not about others. And sure as hell not about kids. 

“Where did you get the booze from? Daryl?” You snort at him before blowing on your tea taking a careful sip. Sitting the cup down you look back towards him.

“I ain’t no rat officer.” He chuckles. You both do. A little inside joke between you both. And then the silence fell. The awkward uncertain silence of two people who didn’t know what to say next. You chew on the inside of your cheek as you stare into the tea. Rain still going strong outside, trapping on the roof of your former home.  Rick shifts beside you clearing his throat.

“Judy trying to walk.” It makes you smile a bit. 

“That’s good. Soon she’ll be running over you and Carl.” The older man chuckles nodding in agreement but you don’t see it. Head still bowed. Turning your mug as you watch the tea shift with each motion. 

“Seeing anyone?” He was trying to keep the conversation going. But there had to be another question to ask that wasn’t this. You still answer it by shaking your head.

“No. But you seemed to have moved on.” It has some bite to you. You're bitter. Of course, you are. The man you were in love with. Seemed to easily move on after he ended it. You lift the ceramic mug and take a huge glug of your tea. The warmth fills you but it’s not enough.

“Ya. Jessie, she’s…” He doesn’t know what to say. Jessie is ok. Good to have around. Doesn’t make him feel as empty. But she is just not you. All her touches. All her kisses. They feel off and he knows why. Because the hands touching him aren’t yours. Neither are the lips that kiss him. But Rick is stubborn. Even if it hurts you both, he knows you need better. You deserve the world and he just can’t give it to you.

“She’s perfect.” You looked at him. Sadness, rooted so deeply in your eyes. He wants to pull you into him. Tell you that he is sorry. That he will end it with Jessie. Come back to you. And try to make all of this right. But he already drew his line in the sand and he won’t cross it. Because the moment he touches you he knows it will be his undoing.

“She has her flaws. No one is perfect.” Except for you. He wants to add. He hears a quiet 'ya' then it silence once again.

  God, I'm so blue, know we're through

But I still fuckin' love you, babe

  You were gone when Rick woke up. His clothes lay on the guest bed since you were dried. He wondered just when you left. He wondered if you slept at all. Because he didn’t. Knowing you were in the house but not in his arms. He was restless the whole night. He sighs. Picking clothes up. It was sad that he hoped this wouldn’t be the last time. But it most likely was going to be the only time. Because how often are you going to walk in the rain drunk? He takes the clothes to the laundry room. Before he throws the shirt in the basket he lifts it to his nose. Inhaling the flowery body wash scent from when you shower last night. You must found where he hid the body wash you left behind. 

“Hey, dad!” Carl called out from the kitchen forcing Rick to dump the clothes in the basket. Entering the kitchen he smiled at his son. Judith was already in her high chair waiting for breakfast. Carl stood at the counter. The box of peppermint tea in his hands. Shit. He meant to put that up. Carl’s eye shifts from the box towards the sink. Where the mugs from last night sat unwashed. Then the young man turns to his father.

“Y/n was here wasn’t she?” He questioned but it was really a statement. It is the only reason for this tea to be out with two mugs in the sink.

“Ya,” He replied, moving towards his son and taking the box of tea from his hand. The young man sighed watching his father place the tea on a high shelf so only he could get to it.

“Why?” Carl asked.

“It was raining-”

“No,” he cut his father off. “Why did you break up with her?”

“Carl,” Rick sighed. As he pinched the bridge of his nose. If he didn’t want to have this conversation with Daryl or Michonne. He sure as hell didn’t want it with his son. But like Rick the young survivor was stubborn. He stepped into his father's past every time he tried to move around him.

“Carl,” Rick warns but the boy isn’t back down.

“No. You were happy with Y/n. Happier than I have ever seen you. Even with mom. Even before all of this.” The boy gestures at nothing but Rick knows what he means by that. Because he didn’t want to admit it. But his and Lori’s relationship was at rock bottom before the world ended. 

“So why? What happened?” Carl pressed, making Rick sigh. He wondered. Only for a second. If Michonne had put Carl up to his. But he shook that from his head. Michonne won’t do that. This is purely Carl. Because Carl loves you so much. The both of you had apparently clicked before Rick had gotten to the quarry. And that bond only grew over time. 

“It’s complicated, Carl. Now please,” Rick needed him to down the subject. And the young boy seemed to understand but is still pissed. He turns from his father. Feet carrying the young boy towards the door. “Where are you going?” He called out.

“Out!” And the slamming door let Rick know that Carl was gone. He sighed. 

  He knew everyone would move on. You would. Carl would. He would. In the far future, all of this will be just a bad memory. But right now. In the present, it hurt so fucking bad. Tears leaked from his eyes as he sucked in air. He did it to himself. He deserved this pain. And if he could he would take your pain. Allow you to be happy. To find love in someone else better than him. Because you're one of the good things in this ugly world. 

  I know we weren't perfect but I've never felt this way for no one