#hels xornoth

[rhapsoddity]

I'm dying to know more about Xornoth and Worm Man and Evil X and Hels in your AU. Crumbs? Crumbs for the starving? 🥺

the gang connected through all streaming minecraft and joining an SMP together,,, they're all losers but they're together at least!

The gang knows Xor's powers and dont care its spooky. They also know Scott is Spectrum bc he's not careful enough with his identity when Xor's on call, but tbh they have bigger problems so they genuinely don't care

Out of Aurelius, Equinox and Worm? Worm is the most traumatized tee hee don't worry about it

[ok-ish-hermitcraft-headcanons]

Just a bunch of species headcanons for the hermits! Also they are all either gods/immortal for fun :)

Xisuma (he/void): Voidwalker prince. Knows he's immortal. One of the oldest immortals

Grian (he/parrot/chirp/they): Parrot hybrid, Head/First Watcher. Minor god of chaos. Has lived a thousand lives. Treats YHS as a joke because why not?

Mumbo (he/him): Half Watcher, minor blood god. Does not know he's a god. Eats redstone for fun, scares his friends because of it.

Scar (he/it/vex): Vexling elf (Vex with allay magic). Does not know he's a god. Was born in Riverdale, kidnapped at a young age.

Pearl (she/her): Half-Watcher/moth hybrid. Also knows she's a god, actually likes the Watchers.

Impulse (he/they/yellow): Demon. Very much knows he's immortal, wishing that he isn't because he doesn't want to watch his brothers die. One of the oldest hermits

Tango (he/magma/they): Netherborn avian, Listener hybrid. Party knows he's a god. His Listener traits aren't visible and more of a development from the experience that was his high school to keep him fucking alive

Zed (he/void/wool): Harbinger of the Nether. Knows he's immortal. Looks like a basic sheep hybrid but also has demon wings and black blood!

Gem (she/her): Faun. Thinks she might be a god but it would mean her brothers aren't. Also has magic and can world-hop!

Etho (whatever vibes work for you): Voidling (Voidborn changeling), Watcher. Knows he's a god, could care less. First player turned Watcher. One of the first players

Iskall (they/he/she + some neos): Cyborg (also something else. I don't fucking know anymore). Doesn't care about gods, marked by the God of the Hunt.

Doc (he/it/blast): Creeper/goat/cyborg. Can and will fight the gods, Xisuma hopes that he doesn't find out he is immortal (he knows).

Ren (he/pup/they): Wolf-shifter. Knows he's the god of the Hunt. Idk this dude is cool

Bdubs (he/sun/sky): Glare/phantom hybrid, also has a connection to plants. God of the sun and flaunts it. Also is a full blooded Listener

Stress (she/leaf/spring): Nature spirt. Knows that she's immortal. Looks like a cinnamon roll, would kill you.

False (she/wing/they): Avian, with golden eagle wings. Does know she's a god, could care less.

Cleo (she/they/rot): Zombie hybrid. Knows she's immortal. Spites her old friends by getting attached to Joe. Also one of the oldest players

Joe (any pronouns): Angel of life. Known immortal. Just vibing with the soul he was meant to harvest.

Jevin (he/it/slime): Slime hybrid. Doesn't know he's immortal. Honestly idk much about him

Cub (he/it): Allayling (allay with vex magic.). Doesn't know he's a minor god. Claims to be a vex for fun.

TFC (he/ender): Ender dragon hybrid. Knows he's a god. Brothers with Notch and Herobrine.

Beef (he/they/it): Cow hybrid. Doesn't know he's immortal. He is basically just existing. Gotta love it.

Keralis (they/he/black/empty): Watcher!. Knows he's immortal. I also know next to nothing about this dude

Xb (he/river/fish/they/it): Guardian hybrid. Doesn't know he's a god. Idk fish

Hypno (he/they): Fire sprit. Could care less about being immortal.

Wels (he/him): Angel hybrid. Knows he's immortal. Hates being an angel because they are a bunch of stuck up beings.

----

Bonus (5) Helsmits:

Ex (he/they/void/end): Voidwalker prince, 2/3 Watcher. Yeah knows their immortal

Hels (they/it/he/fire/blaze/hell): Fallen angel/Watcher. Same as Wels tbh. But 10x worse because Wels escaped and Hels suffered.

Badtimes (he/blue/xe/they): Allayling! Also a Listener! Just vibing :D

Xornoth (they/it/red/dark/vine/he): Demonic elf! Demigod and just out there living vines life

Grain/Ariana Griande (she/it/chirp): Watcher! She knows it's immortal! (trans mtf not important to the hybrid sheet but important to me <3)

I went nuts with pronouns the rest of the helsmits have so much more I'm holding myself back bc I'm being forced to bed :( - 🔮🍄

fun!!

(also i’m so sorry this is from jan 2023)

[syn4k]

list of hermits and empires characters who would do drugs and/or smoke cigarettes, ranked from most to least likely

that hermpires chainsmoker poll thats been going around kickstarted a discussion in my discord so i'm compiling the ideas here because honestly its hilarious

list under the cut. warning for... discussion of drugs and cigarettes. obviously

Fwhip: Definitely a chain smoker. Always has a pack in his pocket.

Iskall: that man's radioactive. she does not fear cigarettes. smokes regularly and is not bothered by it.

Cub: does so many weird drugs. high off something or other almost if not constantly i think

Ren: doesn't smoke but has the best weed on hermitcraft and you KNOW he uses it often

False: not exactly a chain smoker but smokes pretty often i think

Wels: maintains that he does NOT do anything of that sort thank you very much. Actually does. inhaling anything destroys him but he likes the taste and the high so he keeps going

Hypno: smokes everything but is pretty chill about it

Beef: also smokes everything and is even more chill about it

Stress: smokes poisonous mushrooms and is entirely unaffected.

Zedaph: definitely does some sort of drugs

Pearl: has a cigarette every now and then

Pix: also has a cigarette every now and then, not really his thing but he'll take one if offered (for esmp s1: i hold that pixandria has at least one hallucogenic that they keep for spiritual purposes but as the resident pixlriffs expert i also hold that pix got really stressed once, horfed an edible out of sheer desperation, and zoned back in in the middle of the night floating on his back in the river anxious out of his shit. he never touched anything of the sort ever again)

Joe: smokes only weed but does not smoke it often, only sometimes when offered

Katherine: smokes weed

Cleo: was a chainsmoker before s2, after that they got their act together

Impulse: not affected at all by anything (weed fumes give him slight headaches) and only does it when everyone else does because why not.

Bdubs: doesn't smoke (takes edibles very rarely) but rolls the best blunts

Lizzie: partakes sometimes but doesn't care for it

Joey: does drugs and smokes cigarettes in the presence of others just to look cool but actually gives zero shits about them

Xornoth: is always so smug about the fact that they smoke what they call "Evil Weed". fwhip steals some and tries it and it's literally just normal grass.

Mumbo: only smokes cigarettes and only when iskall's around. too anxious for drugs- tried weed once and saw the hat man and was shaking for three hours ljke a small dog afterwards

Joel: doesn't give two shits

Grian: nah

Hels: not interested

Sausage: can handle it pretty fine but stopped after he and joel had hermes because he didn't want to set a bad example for his kid

Scott: definitely some sort of drug dealer but i don't think he ever. does them himself?

Gem: doesn't because of concerns for her health, however in esmp s1 she smoked wizard weed (like gandalf) when the academy's paperwork piled too high for her to handle without help

Shelby: smoked weed but it made her really sick and after Katherine got mad at her for it she stopped. she's actually completely fine when it comes to everything else but she swore off trying so she never knew

Evil Xisuma: never did drugs or vaped with nicotine because the things they learned about addiction at school kept them up at night however they did vape water vapour.

Xisuma: has asthma

Jimmy: would quite literally die. Mans gets nauseous if there's a whiff of weed in the room he's in.

Jevin: eats cigarettes just to piss everybody off

[life-winners-liveblog]

Is it a soulmates situation like double life? Well i suppose more accurately like Scott & Xornoth.

-marigold

Badtimes: Oh no, It's just how Hels work.

[2uuno]

Symmetry was not, even remotely, in love with Joe Hills.

They were hardly friends, she avoided him as much as possible, he was irritating and not even that pretty and, to boot, she didn’t like men. So.

“Doesn’t mean you can’t like him,” Bratwurst said, simply, adding yet another scoop of gravy to his breakfast sausage patties. “I don’t like women and even I had a crush on PearlescentMoon.”

“Didn’t she try to kill you?” Hels snapped.

“Yeah,” Brat sighed dreamily. “It was great.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Symmetry said, definitively, spinning on her heel and marching toward their usual table. “I don’t like him. Besides, I thought we agreed not to talk about him? Hidden recorders, hello?”

“There aren’t any,” EX frowned, looking up from their pancakes. “Wormman promised.”

Xornoth and Symmetry made eye contact, before Xornoth puffed up xeir cheeks and went back to eating. They all knew better than to try to convince EX that Wormman may not have their best interests in mind. No one knew what his motives may be, but they were almost definitely not good.

The five of them settled around the little table in the back of the dining area, just like they had every day for the last month. No one was sure how they’d become such a tight knit group after nearly two months of avoiding each other, but they were, and here they were, a quarter of a year after first meeting, the only people in the world they could trust.

“I don’t like Joe.” Symmetry said, again, seeing Bratwurst open his mouth. “And I don’t know why you think that.”

“I mean, he clearly likes you,” Xornoth said, calmly. “It’s pretty obvious.”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“Okay Sym.”

“I mean it, you’re being ridiculous.”

“I’m just saying,” The demon leaned forward, tilting their head. “Isn’t it funny he comes in through your window every night, spends hours talking to you?”

“I think we should kill him,” Bratwurst said, abruptly and loudly. “I think that’s a reasonable outcome.”

“Don’t you dare,” EX said, through a mouth of pastry. “We’d probably have to pick up litter or something for that.”

“Or just get sent back where we came from,” Hels muttered. “Probably that.”

Everyone fell silent at that.

That’s another thing- they knew this was temporary. As soon as Wormman got what he wanted out of them, they were gone. Symmetry was going back to a fake name and a lonely, paranoid life, EX was going back to the void, Xornoth was going back to that amulet, Bratwurst was going back to the other dimension, and Hels was going back to… well… hell. They probably didn’t have much time left.

“It’s not a bad thing if you like him,” EX said, quietly. “It’s okay.”

“No it’s not.”

“Why not?”

(Because the ‘me’ he knows is someone else? Because I’m not a real person? Because I’m the funhouse mirror twisted version of a shadow of a woman?)

“Because this is stupid,” She huffed. “Like you’re not madly in love with Xornoth as we speak.”

“I’m sorry?!” EX spluttered. “I’m- what?!”

The table dissolved into chaos and stayed that way until Wormman called them in for their morning gardening session, and no one brought up Joe for the rest of the day.

[mleemwyvern]

hi i’m here to ask about your superhero au

hello and thank you because im about to Go Off

so its set in a modern earthlike world, no minecraft stuff, and of course superheroes and villains are a thing. powers are gotten through an injection of power serum, which is mostly controlled by the government and given out through hero programs. you apply, do the tests and the training, and at the end if you're deemed good enough you get powers and a job as a hero.

powers also come with mutations, aka nonhuman traits, because i will never stop nonhumaning the hermits. a higher dose of serum tends to lead to more extreme mutations. some people believe it's also correlated to stronger powers, but that's not really a thing. especially because the strength of a power is hard to quantify. there's little way to tell what you'll get before you're dosed with serum- it's pretty much random.

power serum is the only way to get superpowers in this world. but the government isn't as good at controlling it as they think they are, and there's a thriving black market for the stuff.

unfortunately, a significant minority of the public don't like mutated people, seeing them as inhuman freaks. the flavour of bigotry varies but it is definitely there, and it sucks.

our heroes: the hermitcraft agency, formed by xisuma to help organize and support anyone with powers. they offer a variety of services from power training, to adaptive devices for mutations, to just a community of powered people. most of the cities heroes work there.

our villains: evil x and helsknight, who believe that power serum shouldn't be as restricted as it is. everyone should be able to get powers. the world would be better if everyone did. if everyone was mutated, it would be hard to hate, right? so, fueled by ex's ability to duplicate objects, they go around injecting anyone they can with the serum. against their will. as you can imagine this is A Problem.

i have developed detailed powers and roles in the world for every single hermit, all life series members, and various other hermit adjacents. currently working my way through empires. including a third bonus villain, xornoth, who has rapidly become a massive problem with his mind-altering abilities.

powers tend to be complex and detailed, because that is enrichment for me. they're often highly specific and have multiple uses.

since it's such a big au i won't describe any specific characters here, but i will drop the current list of them, and i encourage sending asks about individual characters! some have more lore than others but they all have a place. the amount of lore does not necessarily correlate to how insane i am about them. there was a lot of input from friends, especially @12u3ie, @will-falling-fell, and @winchestersinthetardisin221b

Hermits: all 28 of them.

Life Series: all 18 of them.

Empires: Pearl, Gem, False, Joel, Jimmy, Scott, Lizzie, Fwhip, Sausage, Pix (sort of- has a role but no powers)

Other: Zloy, Lyarrah (unpowered), Mrs. Welsknight, Quinn Hills, Jack (of kris and jack)

Villains: Evil X, Hels, Xornoth

[hermitcrossovers]

haha, actually Helscraft is a lot safer then expected! It's residents are brought into the world roughly around the time their hermit joins, although this can take years in some cases (it's up for debate if Pearl and Gem have helsmits or if they share one or if the player just stumbled upon helscraft and the world liked them, because it's Xornoth (who isn't evil anymore! (long story))). Helsmits are much kinder then X or Wels say they are, because although many of them are angry at things they can't touch, things from lives and timelines that no longer exist, they find comfort in knowing there are other beings with similar anger who will help them. There's a few basic rules: - do not touch players who are weaker then you in PVP - farms and items are to be shared - yearly gatherings are mandated, to make sure nothing is going wrong - during Watcher attacks, for the love of Herobrine, DO NOT take them on alone. - Watchers attack at least once a week, when this happens, hide until an Admin can deal with them - protect everybody on Helscraft as if they were the people you have lived your whole life with. We only have each other after all - reminder that Polka and Adubs are both weird (not in a bad way), and so please watch your words in the Nether and in the Jungle - Eldritch is nice. provided you don't touch their things.

There's three main sections to Helscraft, Spawn, the Haunted Swamp, and the Great Cavern. Most helsmits live in Spawn, the helsmits of Cleo, Joe, Stress, False, and Iskall live in the Swamp, and the loners (helsmits of Xb, Cub, Tfc (who's helsmit is just Herobrine), Keralis, and Hypno) live in the Cavern!

Spawn has several little areas set up, including True Spawn (home of Ex, Hels, Badtimes, and Xornoth), the Observatory (home of Grain, Renbob, and Proto/Prototype Grumbot), the Cliffs (home of ZedX, Relic/Reluctance, and Polka), and finally the Jungle (home of Echo/Pathos, Chicken, Adubs, and 13).

The residents of Spawn are basically a little town. They like to gather for holidays and just for fun, they trade and share items and farms, they'll offer help for anything needed. There's builders and redstoners and jacks of all trades and those who are there to provide support.

Fundy was raised in Spawn, with his 'home' being in the Jungle with the NHelsO and Etho. Ex and Hels also often visited, and Hels was actually the one egging Fundy to do crime. Ex mostly just kinda sat there and sighed while working on redstone with Echo. Etho also encouraged Fundy to be a menace to get back at the others for petty reasons because everybody doted on this little child, so Fundy could easily sneak into their bases and steal things.

When he returns to Helscraft after the dsmp, nothing's really changed. There's new faces (Grain, Xornoth, Proto), but they're kind and good and fit right in. It's nice to be back in a place where threats are an optional way to show fondness, where pranks are followed with an apology and lighthearted retaliation, where everybody is important (even the weird blob of black... stuff in a human suit that is hels!Keralis/Eldritch).

It's a good place to grow up, in Fundy's opinion - 🔮🐦 (magic bird anon)

that all sounds really nice actually! why are xisuma and wels so mean about the helmits :((( (they just have annoying brothers).

one of the rules of helscraft is to protect the others as if they were your own, how would they react with all the dream smp events that fundy has gone through. considering a vast majority of it was rather negative for fundy.

what does fundy do in helscraft now?

[fogwitchoftheevermore]

i'm going on a VERY fun rabbit hole with this life series/hermitcraft/empires blaseball au thing, so have the next installment, the hermit blaseball au! this one is a lot easier to understand if you don't know anything about blaseball, because this is Much more "i've just put them into the plot of blaseball, they're just hanging out in there". my empires blaseball au can be found here, and the third life blaseball au will be linked here one i finish writing that up.

also, a few of my choices for teams i am not... particularly confident about (namely xisuma, bdubs, hypno, and tango) so if you have a better suggestion for them please pitch it.

Grian: Batter for the LA Unlimited Tacos

Scar: Batter for the Miami Dale

Mumbo: Batter for the New York Millennials, Siphon

Cleo: Pitcher for the Kansas City Breath Mints

Ren: Batter and team captain for the San Fransisco Lovers, Charm

Bdubs: Batter for the Hawai’i Fridays

Impulse: Batter for the Hellmouth Sunbeams

Pearl: Pitcher for the Houston Spies, Precognition

Gem: Pitcher for the Kansas City Breath Mints

Xisuma: Pitcher for the Philly Pies

Evil X: Pitcher for the Hades Tigers

Wels: Batter for the San Fransisco Lovers

Hels: Batter for the Baltimore Crabs

Hypno: Batter for the Mexico City Wild Wings

XB: Batter for the Atlantis Georgias

Beef: Pitcher for the Dallas Steaks

Keralis: Batter for the Core Mechanics

Joe: Pitcher for the Kansas City Breath Mints, later batter for the Seattle Garages

TFC: Coach of the Ohio Worms

Doc: Pitcher for the Core Mechanics

Jevin: Batter for the Charleston Shoe Thieves, Flinch, later rerolled into Reverberating

False: Pitcher for the Tokyo Lift

Stress: Batter for the Tokyo Lift

Iskall: Batter for the Breckenridge Jazz Hands

Tango: Pitcher for the Chicago Firefighters, Fire Eater

Cub: Batter for the Charleston Shoe Thieves, got Flinch from fighting god and got it rerolled into Debt

Etho: Pitcher for the Canada Moist Talkers

Zedaph: Pitcher for the Yellowstone Magic

Wormman: Pitcher for the Ohio Worms

This AU is, even more so than the Empires part of this AU, just me shoving the Hermits into the Blaseball universe and letting it happen.

The only people who are even sort of replacing an actual Blaseball player are Cleo, Joe, and Gem.

Cleo is our Jaylen. She pitches for the Kansas City Breath Mints, and is the best pitcher in the league, and when the Forbidden Book opens, she dies. Her intended replacement is False Symmetry II, aka Empires!False, but when the Forbidden Book is opened in the Empires, Hermitcraft, and Life Series universes all at once, everything gets a little muddled, and everyone comes out of it a little muddled. The biggest change is that Cleo is instead replaced by Gemini Tay, the newly generated player from the Empires world who was meant to replace Xornoth. 

When she is resurrected at the end of season 6, Joe goes into the Shadows in exchange. Within a few seasons, he is able to leave the Shadows and bats for the Breath Mints for about a season, afterwards he is transferred to the Seattle Garages, where he stays. I am not putting him back in the Shadows because it makes me kind of sad.

Cub and Jevin are both players for the Thieves, so they get cursed as a result of the boss fight against the Shelled One. We will resolve that later. Hels, despite being on the Crabs, does not get cursed, because he doesn’t join the Crabs until after they return from ascension.

Other than that, the Hermits are just sort of Existing in the world of Blaseball. Evil X and Hels are both created in similar ways to Evil Twin and Bontgomery Mullock, which is to say, Blessings break and accidentally clone a guy, so we just slightly edit one of their names and keep going. Don’t worry about it. 

At one point during Expansion, while the Reroll Will is still in effect, fans of the Thieves attempt to reroll the Flinch modifier that Cub got as a side effect of fighting god and losing that one time. It gets rerolled into Debt, in a similar vein to what happened to Silvaire Roadhouse, but because he’s on the Thieves, he actually gets to kill people. Good for him. Jevin’s Flinch modifier also gets rerolled, but he gets Reverberating. Good for him, but in a different direction.

[sexymanxisuma]

this post will kind of act like a directory of all the xisuma and evil xisuma shipping posts that can be found on this blog ^-^

the general tag for any posts with shipping of xisuma or evil xisuma is #hermitshipping

hermits with xisuma:

#bdubs x xisuma

#biffa x xisuma

#cleo x xisuma

#cub x xisuma

#doc x xisuma

#etho x xisuma

#false x xisuma

#gem x xisuma

#grian x xisuma

#hels knight x xisuma

#hypno x xisuma

#impulse x xisuma

#iskall x xisuma

#jevin x xisuma

#joe hills x xisuma

#joel x xisuma

#keralis x xisuma

#mumbo x xisuma

#pearl x xisuma

#ren x xisuma

#scar x xisuma

#skizz x xisuma

#stress x xisuma

#tango x xisuma

#wels knight x xisuma

#xb x xisuma

#xisuma x evil xisuma

#zedaph x xisuma

#hermits x xisuma *this one is for posts that may have either hermitcraft as a huge polycule or multiple ships with xisuma (like more than 3 in one post)

hermits with evil xisuma:

#cleo x evil xisuma

#etho x evil xisuma

#grian x evil xisuma

#hels knight x evil xisuma

#hypno x evil xisuma

#keralis x evil xisuma

#mumbo x evil xisuma

#npc grian x evil xisuma

#wels knight x evil xisuma

#wormman x evil xisuma

#xisuma x evil xisuma

#zedaph x evil xisuma

#hermits x evil xisuma *this one is for posts that may have either hermitcraft as a huge polycule or multiple ships with evil xisuma (like more than 3 in one post)

empires:

#fwhip x xisuma

#jimmy x xisuma

#jimmy x evil xisuma

#pixlriffs x xisuma

#smajor x evil xisuma

#xornoth x evil xisuma

#empires x xisuma *this is for posts with either empires as a huge polycule x xisuma or multiple ships with xisuma (like more than 3)

other random ships:

#bertha darling x evil xisuma

#bigb x xisuma

#cabby x evil xisuma

#el mariana x evil xisuma

#napoleon x evil xisuma

#noxintrus x evil xisuma

#satan x evil xisuma

#zloy x xisuma

[cathumanthing2]

Roseblings Chatfic AU Chapter 5

(Tw: implied child abuse at the end)

magic bitches

3:44 pm

scary fish lady: hey jimmy that one tango dude just called

scary fish lady: Why'd you leave your phone anyways

pathetic fish man: oh my boyfriend called woo

tech wizard: excusemewhat

tech wizard: THAT thing got a boyfriend?

actual wizard: fWhip, be nice.

pathetic fish man: Heyyy :( 

jungle bitch: jimmy doesnt have rizz he cant have a boyfriend

pathetic fish man: Yep I have a boyfriend, his name is Tango, hes awesome and he lives in hermit city

buff buff farmer: you do realize that that sounds awrully like the old excuse of, "oh they go to another school you wouldnt know them"

pathetic fish man: but I'm not lyinggg 

pathetic fish man: Lizzie help you know im telling the truth

scary fish lady: no :) 

glitter starboy: sorry but it sounds like ur lying ngl

pathetic fish man: guysss i swear im telling the truthhhh

father: Jimmy, I'm sorry to say this, but it does really sound like you're lying

hopeless romantics

3:58 pm

engineer salmon: i want to scream

engineer salmon: this is pain

Shroom: literally me all the time

elsa boi: fWhip…. I just realized who you like and

elsa boi: get a better taste in men. Please

simp for elves: scott you do know that xornoth told me all about your crush on jimmy last year

elsa boi: im gonna kill them-

elsa boi: but seriously fwhip why. Why. i thought you hated him

Shroom: …I JUST FIGURED IT OUT JUST FROM THAT

Shroom: fwhip. why.

simp for elves: fwhip you like HIM????

engineer salmon: I CANT CONTROL IT OK HES SO PATHETIC ITS SO CUTE-

Shroom: …hes gotten to the point where he thinks the patheticness is cute

Shroom: hes too far gone

elsa boi: best to let the sickness run its course hel cometo it eventualkly

simp for elves: still i cant believe you like jimmy

elsa boi: shh, joey, we're all too gay for this you fucking like my sibling

Shroom: fwhip if jimmy does like you back tho itll take like 6 monts for him to realize it and another 6 monts for him to make a move and by then itll have faded so gl

engineer salmon: kill me now

holders of the sacred braincell

4:02 pm

Queen of all Ducks: should we tell the truth or should we let them keep thinking jimmys lying

Water Cat: lets just wait till tango inevitably visits hermit city bcause that'll be funny

Sandman: As one of Tango and the others' "stalkers", as they call us, I can help nudge it along appropriately. Unless you want to, Pearl.

Queen of all Ducks: Yesssss meddling in others' relationshipssss

Magic Nerd: Ooh can I join? 

Magic Nerd: Actually no I have too much work to finish i cant help

Queen of all Ducks: Cmon, whens the last time you had some fun Gem

Queen of all Ducks: Please join?

Magic Nerd: Sorry, but I seriously have too much work to finish to be doing fun things right now

Queen of all Ducks: fine 

Gem set down her phone, eyes watering. It stung to have to turn down an invitation to do something fun with her friends, but she had to.

She glanced at the C she got on an essay she stayed up an entire night to finish, a reminder to work harder and do better work.

She wiped her tears away and began to type. No use in dwelling on past assignments that she failed miserably on.

(Her mind kept drifting to her parents' reaction to the bad grade, and she shuddered. It didn't help her focus at all.)

[eyelessfog]

my thoughts on the poll thus far:

i want stress v false. sorry sneeg

i honestly don't think i can vote between finn & ren. if its ren v the other guy im voting ren though

i want saint to beat zloy

i dont actually care about this one but im voting hels. for funzies

if lizzie goes against cub i'll cry. they both have too many pros not enough cons

i think joel has to lose the first bracket hes in. UNLESS unless lizzie wins in which case he should go against his wife. mwah

xornoth sweep btw. not all the way but. a significant amount of the way

jojo against sausage n sausage loses please please please youre nothing

grian loss no matter what. promise me

JOE HILLS SWEEP

will not vote between shubble, evil x, or tango. i cant do it.

can i get katherine to win against xb. because everyone loves her forever

wouldnt it be funny if there was a father son sexyman-off [grumbot & mumbo]

i believe in bigb's ability. does everyone remember when bigb & grian met up and everyone fell in love w him on the spot

i NEED eddie to win against etho. i need him to i mean it

JOE HILLS SWEEP

[rhapsoddity]

OH MY GODS I READ THROUGH EVERYTHING AND I'M OBSESSED

Is there an official list of sexual orientations/gender identities for the characters?

not currently!

off the top of my head weve got

Scott - cis gay

joey - cis bi

Jim - trans bi

Ariana Griande - trans!

worm - non binary

auralius (hels) - trans

nox (ex) - transmasc

xornoth - transmasc

im sure more characters are queer but those are off the top of my head

if you go to the fan doccument linked just before the story section in my masterlist, there will probably be far more details there as Plart is a godsend and writes down the lore I give to characters cus I forget

[ok-ish-hermitcraft-headcanons]

Uncorrupted Xornoth is part of Helscraft. They just crash landed in a lava pool during late season 7 while fleeing from Exor (pre esmp lore) and got adopted by Hels (the knight)

Red now lives mostly on helscraft unless vine's needed off server, in which case Hels, Bad and Ex all come with them because they are not letting others hurt their family

Literally no one knows if he's suppose to be the hels of Pearl or Gem (or both) or if dark just. Got added randomly. The server is half controlled by Herobrine after all. Ex has no idea but they also got roped into adopted the traumatized demon

(No idea if this falls under whatever crossover rules you have but what started out as a joke has become an important part of my hermitcraft/helscraft headcanons - 🔮🍄)

Oooh!! Fun!!

(My rules are don’t do too many in a row) (I forget the exact amount I said rn lmao, I think it was three)

[nach0]

👀

Scott looked fearfully up at Gem as she paced in front of him, staff clutched tightly in her hands. Occasionally she would turn and point it at him before growling in frustration and continuing to wear a groove into the floor.

He was bound to a chair, the magic holding him there stronger than any rope, and every glint of her red eyes in the torchlight sent shivers down his spine. He’d thought that he (and everyone else) would be safe when he exiled himself to the ice spikes, but Gem had shown up out of nowhere one day, thrown a sleep potion at his feet, and then he had woken up in the dungeons he hadn’t even known the Crystal Cliffs had.

She hadn’t really done anything though, and that was what confused Scott. Was she just waiting for Xornoth to arrive? But if so, why did she look so... conflicted?

“You’re making it really hard to kill you right now, do you know that?”

Her question was so sudden that he let out a startled laugh, though he winced at her glare.

“I’m sorry?” he said, shrugging as much as he could. “I can insult you if you’d like.”

And then it was Gem’s turn to laugh, though hers was pained and as her anger melted away she just sounded tired.

“I should be killing you, or handing you over to Xornoth, or hels, even handing you over to Fwhip. Exor only knows he’s mad enough.” Scott’s heart ached at the ease the corrupted god’s name fell from her lips but she moved on, returning once again to pacing. “You froze me Scott, do you know how terrifying that was? I should kill you over and over until you feel even a fraction of the fear I felt while I was slowly turning into a statue.”

He stayed silent, sensing a ‘but’. Sure enough she let out a weary sigh and leaned her staff against a wall, tears shining in her eyes as she faced him.

“But I can’t. I have more than enough justifications, and the thought of you walking away unpunished fills me with a rage so strong it almost scares me. I shouldn’t be feeling this... this guilt!”

“It’s because you’re a good person Gem,

[misc-pit-of-things]

INCOMING MESSAGE - COMM RECORDS by writing_and_worrying

The multiverse is in danger. (not sure I can give more without giving spoilers)

The audio script format is very engaging as this story's mysteries unravel. I love how Cubfan is written in this fic.

Redstone and Skulk by Silverskye13

Tanguish, Tango's hels, meets Helsknight.

The imagery is gorgeous and I love how deep interpersonal relationships are really delved into.

War on our Shores by InbetweenHoursGlass

Jimmy washes up on the shore of the Grimlands with no memory.

Doomed relationship that ends just as badly as we can all see it coming, but its done so well all the same.

An Of-fish-ial Guide to Not Being the Cod One Out by ahautism

Jimmy participates in a Codland tradition.

Just a cozy fic about finding a sense of belonging.

The Incandescence of a Dying Light by doctorletmebebrave

Grian gets a Firewatch job to solve the mystery of what happened to his friend Mumbo.

Made me cry. About dealing with grief. But also Grian makes friends with Scar. so its fun and kind too. Really well researched; the author leaves cool links and info in the notes of chapters.

Second Chances by Umbrify

fWhip asks Sausage a question that gives him deja vu.

Excellent rumination on fWhip and Jimmy dynamic between season 1 and 2 of empires. Perfect. No notes.

aitamo: you are not loved by god by soapflowers

Xornoth before, when they were a prince of rivendell.

its got that tasty self fulfilling prophecy sauce in it.

self promo:

Count by TheSparrowWrites

Gem and fWhip backstory! (does use alternative names)

Ancient City by TheSparrowWrites

Pixlriffs proposed that the goblins from season 2 are evolved from the fishfolk from season 1. This is about that.

Second Chance Lives by TheSparrowWrites

Scott is having a great afterlife until suddenly he isn't because cultists have resurrected Xornoth. Still in progress, but hopefully the final chapter should be finished soon!

you know what I haven’t seen going around in a while, and could use some of myself? fic recs! so, consider this both a rec and a self-promo post: recommend some fics to me in the reblogs and I’ll reblog your recs! in general, try to include both a summary and why you’re reccing it (whether it’s a self-promo or someone else’s), and let’s get some eyes on fics!

[2uuno]

does anyone in particular get along well in the au?

ex and symmetry do, surprisingly enough, so do brat and xornoth. hels gets along with no one.