#help me mitosis

[katsettee]

Studying for my biology finals by associating everything with how I think it would apply to Shadow the Hedgehog

[gaylight-prairie]

Triplets born. the throne awaits..

Transparent individual portraits down here v

[reticent-fate]

[sacredst4r]

I have mastered the art of "OC via mitosis" where every OC i have just starts as a complete self insert with no personality, then, I overthink myself in a circle enough to the point that my self insert OC is no longer myself.

[thecorruptedhuman]

'This has to be the most stupid idea you've ever had.' As usual, Chara was quick to call Frisk out on their every thought and action. 'Don't you think someone's tried this already?'

'But what if it works? Don't you want some peace and quiet?' Frisk replied, making their way down to Hotland.

To the True Lab.

'It could kill you. Truly and finally kill you. Then what? This plan will get us killed.'

'Yeah, well, forgive me if I don't trust you as an expert on what plans will or won't get people killed.'

'Wow. That's a pretty low blow.'

'Sorry,' They replied with a shrug as they decided to go over the plan again. Monster Souls can't handle determination; this much had been proven true by the existence of the Amalgamates.

But what about a person whose determination was already able to control the flow of time? If you were to inject their Soul with DT, could you force the Soul to split in two?

'You could lose your reset,' Chara tried to plead. 'Everything could be gone if you do this!'

'Good, no one needs another reset.'

***

The True Lab was haunting, and that much had never changed. Dust and cobwebs covered every surface as Frisk walked the halls, pretending to be brave.

'Here we are,' Chara stated, though they didn't seem very enthusiastic. 'You'd better not waste your Soul.'

Truth be told, Frisk was at least a bit nervous about destroying their Soul for good, if not for themself, then for Chara's sake. Why should they have to die again?

Their were vials of determination laying all about the distressed workspace. They were empty, much to Frisk's dismay. 'Good riddance,' was all Chara had to say on the matter. Out of frustration, Frisk slammed their fists down on the desk, "dammit, there has to be something," they pleaded aloud.

The sudden force on the desktop caused a drawer to pop open on the side. Peering in, Frisk could see two vials. Their hope returned as they snatched the vials and got to work.

Chara was uncharacteristically silent as Frisk went about finding the tools they'd need. Finding a couple of syringes seemed to be the easy part. Do I inject it into my blood? Directly into my Soul? How do I go about that, I don't have Soul magic. I should've asked Dr. Alphys for help. All of these thoughts raced through their mine, creating doubt. Frisk took a dee breath and decided to get to work regardless.

First, they concentrated on finding their Soul. It felt warm, strong, and happy. The culmination of their very being. Carefully, Frisk worked to pull the Soul more outward, allowing it to protrude slightly from their chest as the red glow filled the room. So far, so good. Holding their Soul in their left hand, Frisk carefully grabbed the syringe in their right, bringing the needle toward their Soul with a slightly shaky hand. Another deep breath as Frisk worker to steady themselves, and the needle pierced the Soul. It didn't necessarily hurt so much as it just felt odd.

They pushed on the plunger of the syringe and screamed.

It was no longer warm.

It was no longer strong.

It was no longer happy.

Frisk dropped the syringe as they stumbled back, eyes screwed shut, empty glass shattering across the floor as they knocked the desk over. They writhed in pain, thrashing and screeching as the pain in their Soul only increased. It felt as if it were growing, stretching, tearing open at the seams as if it had outgrown its container.

Their breath left them as their Soul snapped in two.

The world around them was silent.

Their mind was silent.

Frisk opened their eyes as their Soul returned to their body.

A familiar shape crouched in front of them, red eyes filled with shock and confusion, an incredulous smile stretched across rosy cheeks.

The same person who'd been living in their mindspace since their first tumble into the Underground.

"...Chara?"

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

pro: slept like 10 hours which is far more than i usually sleep

con: slept through half my study time bc my internal clock usually wakes me up no later than 9:30 and i have a midterm in an hour and a half

[ocean-returns]

It didn't click for me right away, but "I'm fine because you fixed yourself. We're Time Lords. We're doing rehab out of order." is an explicit statement that, from the moment he begins to exist, 15 already has all the memories that 14 will ever accrue.

So rather than a true mitosis-style duplication like the term "bi-generation" might imply, what we actually have here is more an issue of temporal displacement and/or causality failure. 14 still ultimately feeds into 15, but with an inexplicable disconnect between cause and effect that's consistent with the reality-breaking nonsense of whatever the hell the Toymaker is. When the Toymaker says, "Your own rules have decreed I play my third game with the next Doctor.'' that's not just a fun way of saying 'I'm gonna kill you now', he's outright breaking causality to acquire the next Doctor fully formed ahead of schedule.

All of which is to say that 14 shouldn't spawn a separate regeneration chain when he dies, helping to mitigate the whole "cursed to outlive my loved ones" issue that's always the elephant in the room in this kind of plot.

[akanemnon]

Hello I would just like to say thank you because the joke about Kris going through mitosis legit helped me pass one of my end of the year tests

You go, anon!

[lady-ace]

Mitosis

(set in an AU where Mary and Freddy are both small in their champion form, and Billy doesn't work for Whiz yet.)

Almost everyone knew the marvels. The magical sunny trio, who always seemed joined at the hip. Where one went, the other two were never too far behind.

Of course, with Captain Marvel being the oldest and looking very similar to the other two (Black hair, blue eyes, you get the idea) everyone thought the same thing; “Cap is the father of Mary Marvel and Captain Marvel Jr. Come on, it's even in the name!”

No one, from the public or the superhero community ever brought it up with them, because 'Well, it's obvious!'

..And then the Captain told them they were completely wrong.

/ / /

Superman, while in a casual conversation with the other leaguers, refers to Marvel Jr. As Captain Marvel's son.

Cap, who happened to overhear: “Son? Jr is my older brother.”

[Shocked pause]

GA, gobsmacked: “Why is he called Jr then?”

Cap, a little taken aback by the apparent shock this was to the others: “Well, to be honest, when Jr was coming up with a name, i suggested Jr, because he was smaller than me, and the name stuck.”

GA, still blue screening the fact that Jr was not Cap's son: “Wow.”

GL, waving his hands frantically to accentuate his point: “Are we just gonna pass over the fact Cap just said Jr was older than him?”

Plastic man, jokingly: “Next he's gonna tell us Mary Marvel isn't his daughter either.”

[Cap shoots Plas a look, and before he can speak up, Plastic man continues, his joking tone nowhere to be seen, now in it's place, an almost disbelieving one.]

Plastic man, incredulous: “Oh my God, you are.”

Cap, nodding in agreement: “She's my twin.

[Que various noises of surprise all around the table.]

/ / /

After a few days of Marvel trying to clear up the misunderstanding, it was quite clear a lot of the leaguers simply didn't believe him. Either chalking it up to magic shenanigans or just really doubting he could be younger than Freddy, even though it was so apparent he 'wasn't.'

So, they decided to pull a prank.

With the help of a spell, he aged his Champion form down to the age of his siblings, and dressed up as Mary.

They couldn't wait to see their faces when they saw not one, but two 'Mary Marvels' flying around the watchtower.

After all, they were twins. And what better way to prove it than the classic twin switch-up?

/ / /

Flash, rubbing his eyes before looking again: “I'm not seeing things, am i? Please tell me i've not gone crazy.”

WW, shaking her head: “No. You are seeing things correctly. There's two of our friend present.”

Flash, now a bit worried: “Has Mary been cloned, or is being followed by a doppelganger?”

WW, tilting her head a bit, trying to remember something: “Not that i recall. Maybe you could ask her about it? She doesn't seem concerned about the 'clone'.”

Flash, slapping his forehead in a 'why didn't i do that earlier?' way: “Good idea.”

[Flash goes over to the two Marys (Maries?). When he arrives, one of them beams.]

Billy: “Hi, Flash! How are you doing?”

Flash: “Good! Well, i've been meaning to ask you.. uh, something.”

Mary, grinning: “Well, go ahead.”

Flash, a bit too bluntly: “Why are there two of you?”

Billy, with the most cheerful voice ever: “Mitosis!”

Flash: “Mitosis?!”

Mary, saying this as if it was the most obvious thing: “Why do you think there's only one big Marvel, and the rest of us are small? We separated from the captain recently.”

Billy, holding in a laugh: “But keep it secret, okay? Me and the others trust you to never tell anyone our secret.”

Flash, who is like 'WTF did i just hear': “Uhh.. sure. I won't tell anyone.”

[The two proceed to tell everyone the supposed 'Secret.' Only years later the League would find out it was a prank, when Billy and Mary showed them their civillian forms. They still use the 'Mitosis' as a inside joke when a new member joins the League.]

[causenessus]

try again

part 0.5. MITOSIS

“he’s starting to think maybe she queues up certain songs on that little speaker of hers, knowing he’ll be out here listening to them while he’s waiting to see her. but how does that work? it’s a different song every time he comes in here and he can’t be sure they’re about him. maybe he’s crazy for assuming she’s doing something specifically for him when he’s nothing more than a used to be friend reduced down to a client who is currently trying to be friends with her again. “i want you to stay.” he likes the song she’s playing outside in her waiting room today. and the way the line repeats over and over is only feeding into the assumption he's making right now: that she’s playing these songs specifically for him. “stay the hell away from me.” okay. so maybe he shouldn’t talk to her about the songs. it still makes sense, he thinks to himself (or maybe he's just being stubborn about giving up this stupid hope). maybe she is playing certain songs for him, but she’s obviously not happy to see him today.”

note: pay attention to unsent messages :) (there's one); sorry this chapters a little ????? it's only the peas in a pod gc </3 and everyone is confused because feelings are hard </3

prev. | m.list | next

extras <3

I'M SORRY IF ANYTHING WAS CONFUSING THIS CHAPTER

i'm trying to...like escalate more into what happened during their years in high school without revealing too much yet...

but!! moodboards will be coming out after this <3 because y/n's family issues have now been mentioned!! yay!!!

so the moodboards will also help provide more context i think :))

the y/n shower tweet was a joke!! just in case that wasn't obvious

i have nothing else to say about this chapter except for that i am sorry

bokuto was like the voices in my head going crazy so i feel like his texts are super abrupt

NEXT CHAPTER WILL HOPEFULLY BE MORE OF A BANGER THOUGH!!

taglist: @eggyrocks @wyrcan @guitarstringed-scars @strawberryuri @violetesensou @kakeru-eem @glmge @heytheredemonsss @mollyrolls @bemebiu @daszy @snail-squasher @0moonii @thiisisntlovely @todorokiskitten @rory-cakes @iiwaijime @iatethemochi @yuminako @savemebrazilhinata @kismyscars @bokutoko @nobodybutnnoorr @wolffmaiden @daisy-room @softpia @lees-chaotic-brain @v3nusplanetofluv @crispchocolates @phoenix-eclipses @hhoneyhan @encrypta @rockleeisbaeeee @cr4yolaas @zombriesworld @localgaytrainwreck @moucheslove @hibernatinghamster @notverymarley @certaindreampost @akaakeis @ciderscape @lucien-luna @strawbrinkofdeath @wave2mia @samuel1004 @01trickster10 @dazqa @cosmiicdust @chemiru

[lomlhwa]

you're such a nerd (j.ww)

pairing: tutor!wonwoo x student!reader

preview: you really need to pass biology so you asked your teacher to hook you up with a tutor. now, he didn't expect you to literally hook up with your tutor. how could you not? he looks so cute in his glasses.

tags/warnings: fem reader, some biology terms, reader is kinda obsessed with wonu's glasses, voice kink on the reader's part, praise, pet names (baby, baby girl, baby cakes, good girl) academic rewarding, light choking, like one spank, semi-public sex, unprotected penetration (wrap it before you tap it), m & f orgasm

trigger warnings: n/a

wc: 1.4k

song recs for this fic: light a flame by seventeen, kiss me if you can by the boyz, die for you by the weeknd

a/n: can you tell i have a thing for men in glasses? you'll be able to tell as soon as you start reading this fic. also every time i wrote about those roll-y chairs my brain went "AUTOBOTS, ROLL OUT"

then….

“mr. kim i really need to pass your class. are there any students you could hook me up with to tutor me?” you gave your professor your very best puppy dog eyes.

you’re borderline failing this man’s class. a class you need to pass to get your degree. a class you willingly signed up for and you pay money for.

“yeah there is. wait here” he walks away into his office. you hear him pick up his landline phone and dial a number. you take a seat on one of the stools at the counter. 

“he’s on his way. we’ll wait for him.”

about 15 minutes pass before a tall, nerdy looking boy bursts through the door. he almost tumbles over, the handful of books in his hands almost toppling out. he’s adorable. but the cutest thing about him is his circle glasses that he’s pressed back up his nose at least three times already. 

“you said you want me to tutor a student, mr. kim?” he sounds out of breath. did he run all the way here from his dorm? “yes. this is y/n. she’s failing this class and wants some help” your teacher turns to you. “y/n, this is your tutor.” your new tutor waves at you.

“hi, i’m wonwoo. jeon wonwoo.” 

god, his voice. you’re gonna love being his student.

now….

“wonwoo, i don’t get this” you hold up your worksheet to your tutor. over the past couple weeks, you could say you’ve grown close with him. quite close.

“okay, put your listening ears on baby cakes” he rolls his chair over to you. his unhooks his glasses from the collar of his shirt, sliding them up his beautiful nose. 

“so, a chromosomal mutation is a mutation involving a long segment of dna. these mutations can involve deletions, insertions, inversions, or translocations of sections or segments of dna” you nod, trying your best to pay attention. “...and in some cases, deleted portions may attach to other chromosomes, disrupting both the chromosomes losing the dna and the one gaining it.” you nod again, the movement being so mindless.

“you won’t pass bio if you keep zoning out like that. i just explained chromosomal mutation and you weren’t listening. that was your one shot, baby girl” he flicks you lightly on the forehead before rolling away again. 

“no no no, one more time wonwoo” you roll yourself over to him and pull him back to your desk. he rolls his eyes and playfully tries to pull himself away from you. “i already explained it to you though” you manage to pull him back and he pouts. 

“one last time” you push your worksheet towards him. “explain it differently this time. like a chromosomal mutation remix” you giggle. 

“ugh okay so, chromosomal mutations can result from errors in dna replication during cell division, exposure to mutagens or a viral infection” you nod, actually listening this time. watching his plump lips move helped you really listen in. “...and chromosome abnormalities often happen due to errors during dividing of sex cells, meiosis or errors during dividing of other cells, mitosis.” 

“okay, now do your worksheet” he slides it back over to you. you expect him to roll away from you, but he doesn’t. he hovers next to you, inspecting your answers. you don’t notice at first, but his hand slowly trails up your thigh.

when you finally realize, it’s because it slides all the way back down to your knee. you erase your previously written answer and try something else. it must’ve been right because his hand moved up again. you figured out his system. 

wrong answer? hand back down at the knee. right answer? hand moves up and under your tennis skirt. 

you finally get to the last question; a question about the cause of chromosome abnormalities. unfortunately, you’re blanking at what wonwoo told you. his hand had fully come up to your core and he had been playing with your clit over your panties for the past 10 minutes. your brain was becoming hazy. 

“i taught you this less than an hour ago, baby girl. if you get this right, i’ll let you cum. come on, it’s the last question” your breathing hitched and you nod. you focus in and try and remember the answer. you write down your answer and wonwoo pounces on you. 

he mashes your lips together in a rough, sloppy kiss. he licks over your bottom lip and you open your mouth instinctively. a loud whine leaves your throat as his hand keeps it’s ministrations going.

“cum for me baby. you did so well” his mouth leaves yours and trails wet kisses all over your throat. he breathes heaving in your ear, his other hand coming up to push his glasses up.

“please, ah, please keep talking” you whine, shifting uncomfortably in your chair. “i need your voice.” he smirks at you. he knew his voice was nice. but the fact that it’s helping you get off? that was amazing to him.

“come on, baby girl. you deserve it. you’re doing so well for me. my good, sweet girl”  the mix of his heavy breathing, his sweaty musk and his words sends you over the edge. your hand flies down to his wrist to slow him down. “there you go, that’s it. that’s my good girl.” 

you lean your head back on the chair, catching your breath. he picks you up out of your chair, flipping you around and bending you over. the coldness of the desk on your arms shocks you and you jolt a little. 

“god, baby. you look so pretty in your little skirt” he says as he flips it up. he takes his glasses off and places them on the table. “no no no, please, keep them on. you look so good with them on” you beg. “you can’t even see me” he laughs. you hand them back to him, turning at the waist to glance at him. “just do it.”

he slides his glasses back up his nose and sighs. he pulls your panties down to your mid-thighs. he pulls his pants down the same length on his own legs. “i would really like to have you screaming my name, but we are kind of in public. i’m gonna need you to be quiet.” 

out of nowhere, he plants a hard spank on your now exposed ass. you squeal, your hand coming up to cover your mouth. “knew you’d like that, baby” he teases. he palms his length and teases your hole with his tip. 

he rests his hands on your hips as he pushes into you, his pelvis meeting with your ass. he lets out a deep breath, one of his hands falling on the desk next to your ribs. “fuck, my god baby girl” his voice is low and it makes you clench tightly around him. 

he drags out of you slowly before slamming back into you, your ass jiggling at the contact. your arms weaken almost instantly, laying down onto the table. wonwoo reaches around you and rips open your button-up shirt, the buttons popping off and scattering all over the floor. 

“wonwoo!” you cry out. “sorry, baby. i got impatient” he digs his fingers into your hips and sets a steady pace. his fingers are sure to leave marks on your skin. marks you’ll be admiring for days in the mirror. 

he presses your head into the desk. your mouth hangs open, drool pooling next to your face. your eyes roll into the back of your head repeatedly. 

“what can chromosomal mutations involve?” he says suddenly. “what?” you pant. “what can chromosomal mutations involve? give me the right answer and i’ll let you cum” he attaches the pad of his pointer finger to your clit, speeding up your oncoming orgasm. “oh my god uh” you pause to rack your brain for the answer. 

as your orgasm threatens to crash down on you, you blurt out the answer. “mutations can involve deletions, insertions, inversions, or translocations of sections or segments of dna” you cry out, your orgasm causing you to twitch on the table. “fuck fuck fuck, good girl” he pulls out of you, letting his orgasm spill onto your skirt. 

you pick your head up off the table and wipe the drool off the side of your face. “y’know, when you asked mr. kim to hook you up with a tutor, he didn’t mean for you to hook up with your tutor” he pulls your panties back up your legs and flips your skirt back down. 

“you got the last question wrong by the way” he nods towards your paper. “but by then, i couldn’t keep it in my pants” he kisses your drooly lips, smiling at you. “what the fuck, wonwoo.”

“sorry, baby cakes. do it again and maybe we’ll go for round two.” 

© lomlhwa 2023

[the-raven-lady]

(Not) The Savior You Long For [Part 1]

[Masterlist] [My Ko-Fi]

Pairing: Night Lord (OC: Elias Rushorik) x serf!Reader [fem]

Song Inspiration: Fear Inoculum - TOOL [YouTube] [Spotify] “Enumerate all that I'm to do / Calculating steps away from you / My own mitosis / Growing through delusion from mania / Exhale, expel / Recast my tale / Weave my allegorical elegy.”

Warnings: Violence, explicit and detailed blood and gore, disgusting and disturbing imagery, terror and dread, fear of death, all of the warnings you should expect hearing the words ‘Night Lord’ bestie this is the “I love murder” legion.

Word Count: 2.8k

Author’s Note: The long awaited Night Lord claiming + womb tattoo series. This part is primarily exposition and setting the scene. Also new dividers? Raven Lady's getting fancy.

[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3]

Tag List: @egrets-not-regrets @sleepyfan-blog @kit-williams @bleedingichorhearts @bispecsual

@lemon-russ @moodymisty @dedios-of-the-word @pickpocketing-your-gender

The slosh of brown water on the floor splashes away from your washcloth, and you overextend your shoulder trying to catch it before it runs too far. Hissing at the sudden spasm, you sit back on your heels, rolling it out to soothe the ache. You’ve been on your hands and knees for what feels like far too long now, and your joints are starting to protest. It seems the other serf helping you isn’t faring much better. A glance in her direction reveals her sitting like a child, knees bent and feet flat on the floor, using the full weight of her body to scrub between the seams of the floor panels. You shake your head and return to pushing around the rusty water, struggling to remove the grime from the floor. 

The act was pointless. Everyone knew that it wouldn’t be another week before the armory would be so rancid with dried bodily fluids that a cleanup crew would have to scrub it down again, but you knew better than to make a comment on it.

The racket of raucous laughter nearby shoots ice through your veins. You and the other serf instinctually freeze at the sound, and it doesn’t even cross your mind to check on her before abandoning your post, scrambling off of the wet floor in a flash to hide behind a large crate. The cold metal at your back would shield you from view, you know, but the hammering in your chest and shuddering of your breath would be beacons for a bored astartes. Silently, you will yourself to calm down at any cost, holding your breath for so long your lungs begin to burn from the effort.

Their heavy footfalls eventually fade into the distance, off to another area of the ship. Still, you remain in place for another few minutes until you’re as certain as you’ll ever be that they’re gone. You dare not risk yourself getting caught by a group of Night Lords, if experience has taught you anything.

You’ve become jaded to the rags of tanned hide displayed proudly on their armor and the grotesque corpse art that lines the walls of Nightfall. The smell doesn’t even get to you anymore, having been surrounded by abundant death and decay for so long. Everything reeks of it. Even if you did take the time to think on the dreadful feelings that stir when you see them, your body wouldn’t be able to afford losing any more meals with how sparingly you’ve been fed.

What has never left you are the screams. The gush of blood pouring from a weeping laceration. The crack of breaking bones. Desperate cries from the poor targets of the Night Lord’s insatiable appetite for ‘entertainment’, sobs and begs for their lives— No, no, no, please! I’ll do anything, please, just let me go–!— eventually turning into pleas to be put out of their misery, shown mercy, as their captors only laugh and croon. No mercy flowed through them; they were never quick with their kills. It was all a sadistic game to feed off of the tears and terror for as long as they could. The Night Lords wouldn’t stop their fun until their playthings had been bled dry– literally or figuratively.

You peek out from around the crate, surveying the dim armory. Empty. 

The serf you had been working with was missing as well, likely sequestered off somewhere for safety. The utter silence of the room causes your gut to tremble with anxiety. It was a dangerous game to be alone: lone serfs were prime prey, and you by no means wanted to make yourself an easy target. 

With no small amount of horror, you realize it’s outside of your power to do anything about it. Your lungs deflate, and you give yourself a false reassurance before returning to your station on the floor, taking up the soiled wash rag and wringing it out into the water bucket. Pieces of slimy rehydrated skin pass over your fingers. You return to your efforts with the intent to finish as quickly as possible. The desire to flee to your cot is all-encompassing, driving you to redouble your efforts and get the job done just passably enough that you won’t be killed for it. 

A thought stops you, though. Where had your companion gone? It’s not that you particularly cared for her safety (you didn’t know her and caring is a luxury you could not afford), but to be gone without a trace was peculiar. You don’t remember hearing her footsteps, but you had also been preoccupied with yourself at the time.

You look around the empty room for anything out of place. Nothing appears to have moved since you last checked. Her brush and bucket are still on the floor, right where she had left them. You had seen her put them down there, right?

…Hadn’t you?

You dismiss the thought. She was probably still hiding somewhere, and for that, you couldn’t fault her. There was no loyalty amongst serfs of the Eighth, just an understanding that it was safer together than apart. Wanting to determine how much longer you would be here, you observe the areas the other serf had already worked.

Drip. Drip. Drip.

The surfaces of the floors, storage units, and walls were visibly much cleaner than the rest, but she had done a horrible job wiping things down as she went. The steady dripping of a poorly dried surface unpleasantly fills your ears, slowly becoming the only thing you can focus on. You frown. It was amazing how you could begin to miss the ever-present dull thrum of the ship’s electrical systems when it was covered by something even slightly more annoying. 

Drip. Drip. Drip.

You shake your head and get back to working around the floor grate at the center of the room. Its placement makes it convenient to push the disgusting wash water into. As expected, the seams around the drain are compacted with hair and dried flesh, and you have to soak the mass to begin to scrape it free. The spongy texture is a nightmare to work with, but it wouldn’t be such a chore if you had some help.

Drip. Drip. Drip.

Annoyed, you decide you’ve had enough of it. Water sloshes in the bucket when you wrench your washcloth to go wipe down whatever it is she had left unfinished, rising up to your feet. With some luck, you’d figure out where she had run off to. It wouldn’t come as a surprise if she had abandoned you altogether, leaving you to finish the task and fend for yourself.

A cursory glance over the bench, lockers, and racks reveals nothing out of the ordinary. They were passably clean and– perplexingly– completely dry. You ran a hand along them to be certain and, surely enough, it came away much the same. Odd. You were certain that you would find something. Continuing your search leaves more questions than answers.

Drip. Drip. Drip.

Checking around a wall of storage cabinets, you carefully inspect each of the gaps for signs of water or some other liquid that could be leaking. You find nothing. 

At the end of the lockers, a shadow dances in the dim candlelight. Fear grips you for just a moment as you focus in on it, but it is much too small to be an astartes. At the realization, the chill in your blood is replaced with a simmer of frustration, and you stomp down the hall towards the figure.

Your eyes lock with the other serf’s. “Are you just hiding to–?”

You stop. It appears she had been too preoccupied with hanging from a bracket on the wall to come to your aid. The side of her neck is torn open with loose strips of muscle and connective tissue fanning over her shoulder. A glistening metal finial of Nostraman design pokes ornately through her spine and sternum, partially coagulated blood pooling at the tip.

Drip. 

Drip. 

Drip.

“About time,” a voice spits.

You’re suddenly dragged by the back of your robes, hoisted up into the air by an unseen force. The scream that leaves you tears at your vocal cords, but it’s choked off by the fabric of your neckline biting into your throat. Thrashing your head from side to side, you catch sight of a colorless face cackling, bloodied lips curled into a grin. You desperately kick your legs in an attempt to free yourself.

“Feisty little pet, aren’t we?” he asks. The Night Lord turns you around easily as you struggle, splitting red as he talks. “Good. Your friend was far more boring.”

You rake at the fabric around your neck, trying to alleviate the pressure preventing oxygen from getting to your head. The action only makes him laugh harder. “Oh, how precious. Poor little serf can’t breathe?” He tilts his head as he taunts you, and a cruel glint crosses his eye.

“How about I help with that?”

A half turn and your back slams against the wall, knocking the wind out of your lungs. Your gasp of pain ignites a malicious glee within your captor, a row of bloodied yellow teeth peeking from behind his lips. At least like this, pinned to the wall, you have the ability to catch your breath, ragged and shallow. Each rough huff eases the ache in your diaphragm.

A hand roughly snaps your head forward, forcing you to focus on the face at your front. He suffocates you with his presence, leaning in far too close. “You know,” he starts, “I had been just about ready to walk in there and drag you out myself.” Despite the melodic quality of his voice, you only feel discomfort at the astartes’s words as he uningenuously laments. “I could only stare at my masterpiece for so long.” 

Briefly, your eyes linger on the silhouetted corpse of the other chapter serf. You hadn’t even heard her scream. Hadn’t heard the attack. Hadn’t heard the bones crack when she was unceremoniously mounted on the wall. You had managed to miss every detail.

…Or your captor had been skilled enough to mask them. You shiver.

He follows your gaze, scoffing when it lands on the body. “Your buddy is as pretty as she is stupid, trying to run all the way back to the hole you serfs call home.” The image of the other serf running down the hallway and getting caught as you did passes through your mind, and you grimace at the thought of whatever game she may have suffered through to end up where she is. The sing-song cadence of his voice draws your attention back to the Night Lord in front of you, “You humans fall so easily to your emotions. Not the brightest of you lot I’ve had, but certainly the best bait.”

Bait. The word is sour in the air.  

“So unwilling to have fun–” 

She had just been bait. 

“–but you’re eager to play, aren’t you?”

You were the game.

Your blood runs cold, eyes widening as you process everything you had missed or ignored up until now. Black blurs the edges of your vision. “Oh, don’t be like that,” the Night Lord shakes his head, but you know better than to believe it. This is exactly what he wanted. “We can be great friends—” 

Self-preservation takes a hold of you. Your adrenalized brain screams to overcome, persist. In an act of desperation, your hands shoot out before you, and you manage to jab your fingers into his dark eyes and claw. The astartes snarls, ducking away and dragging you with him off of the wall as he stumbles back. With a shake of his head, he regains his senses. He growls.

“You stupid bitch!”

The Night Lord tosses you like a ragdoll, uncaring of how your head impacts the nearby bench before hitting the floor. The world spins around you. “I’ll gut you like a pig for that, you impudent rat!” he roars, ceramite boots stomping closer. His eyes are wild, red around his enlarged pupils from where you’ve managed to burst blood vessels. Uncoordinated, you scramble backwards on the floor, staring up at the approaching astartes in terror. 

This is it. This is where you die: surrounded by filth, hyperventilating on the floor as a pissed off Night Lord tortures you within an inch of your life until you perish from the stress. All for one measly act of courage. Your back hits a wall as he rounds the bench, and you find yourself unable to watch any longer as fate unfolds before you. You curl up in a ball, turning away and protecting your head with your arms, then wait for the inevitable killing strike.

And wait.

…And wait.

But the blow never comes– no white-hot stab of pain, no sting of a kick to the ribs, no blunt ache of broken bones– just a sickeningly sodden crunch of flesh and bone. A wet spray paints your back. Your tattered robes easily soak up the warm liquid, causing you to flinch from the sudden moisture. Even through the rush of confusion and fear, it doesn’t take you long to realize what it is. The scent is unmistakable.

Your heartbeat pounds in your ears as you struggle to catch up with your surroundings. By all means, you should be dead: the newest addition to a Night Lord’s skin cloak, or at the very least in excruciating pain. But you aren’t. 

Tentatively, trembling, you withdraw your head from the cage of your arms, turning just enough to peer behind you. You gasp at the grisly sight. 

Crimson rivulets of blood drip down over massive navy blue gauntlets. A single enucleated eye dangles from the gore between its digits. The terminator, more mountain than man, holds the unmoving body of your persecutor up by what remains of his cranium and neck. It is little more than ribbons of meat now.

Bile rises in your throat. You struggle to force it back down. 

Bolted armor caked in blood– both dried and fresh, sunken deep into the recesses of the ceramite plating– gives off an aura of wrought iron and decay. The metallic tang permeates the air around him, hanging heavy in the poorly ventilated armory. His scarred skin looks sickly pale. Greasy. Dehydrated. Aside from deep black eyes that watch you as a predator observes prey, the most prominent feature on his face is a wicked scar: a tear in his upper lip that exposes maxilla and sharp teeth alike. The shock of black hair on his head still has the impression of his helmet on it.

Without so much as a sound, he had come up from behind and grabbed the smaller Night Lord by the face, yanking them back into the crux of his chestplate and pauldron with enough force to shatter the hardened skull of an astartes. 

The massive marine throws the limp corpse of his former brother aside. The impact of metal on metal causes your ears to ring as a thousand pounds of lifeless ceramite strikes the wall, immediately followed by a disgusting wet slop of pulverized brain matter spilling onto the floor. If you had been on the Nightfall for any less time, you would have screamed. The shock almost prevents you from registering that you’re being spoken to.

“Get up.”

The terminator’s voice is that of rolling thunder and coarse gravel, resonating deep within your chest and leaving your heart fluttering with trepidation. His words had been spoken no louder than conversational, and yet they had you shooting up to your feet as if they had been shouted. Your wobbly legs nearly give out beneath you from how quickly you rise from the floor, croaking a shaky, “Yes, my lord.”

He removes his helmet from where it is magnetized to his belt with a click, placing it down on the bench you had been cowering behind. The tusks on it are as long as your forearm and nearly as thick. A faint decal of a skull is painted around the red lenses, chipped and fading but almost cartoonishly cute in contrast to the rags of flesh and weathered bones decorating the rest of his armor. 

The new Night Lord doesn’t seem to find it nearly as amusing as you do. He pushes the helmet in your direction, and you clamber to catch it before it hits the ground, not wanting to incur his wrath by dropping it so soon after he had just saved your life. The metal is heavy in your arms, tusks dangerously close to puncturing your throat.

“Clean it,” he barks. 

You grab your wash rag from the floor and shake it out. You do not have to be told twice.

[Part 2]

[xetlynn]

Twilight- Youngest Shadow: Chapter Three, Crash It

(Alice X Reader X Jasper)

[two] [three] [four]

Today was the day of my 6th Volleyball game out of 14. It’s a Home game.

Every single game has been attended by Jacob, Quil and Embry. Sometimes Sam and Billy. Bella made it to about two. Clearly needing to do her own thing I understood. If I didn’t understand a sport I wouldn’t want to go either.

She makes me sit with her at lunch still, I got kind of close with Angela. She’s cool. She also comes to games but that’s to take pictures, helping with the yearbook committee.

Bella and I walk out of the house together. I see my bike is gone and remembered I had to give it to Jacob for maintenance. Since he offered I was getting it done for free.

It’s also raining so I’m kind of glad I don’t have to choice to ride it. Sometimes the rain drops hurt like a bitch. I lift my hood up, walking behind Bella as we go down the steps. “Great.” She mutters under her breath.

Charlie pulls in with her truck. “Dad I can drive us to school myself.” As we get closer to the bottomed step she slips and falls on her ass. Tripping due to not watching where I was going I go forward.

“You okay, Bells? [Name]?” Charlie climbs out of the truck, helping Bella up and then the both help me. I ripped a new pair of jeans, hissing in pain from my hands I wipe it on my sweater that’s not so new. Luckily I didn’t bleed at all. “Ice doesn’t help the uncoordinated.” Bella frowns at her own joke.

“Clearly.” I groan.

“That’s why I got you new tires.” Charlie points to the red truck. “The other ones were nearly bald.”

“You got me new tires. No one’s ever don’t that before.” Both Charlie and I look at her confused. “I mean… nothing.”

He glances at me, not getting it but he heads to his cruiser.

“I won’t make it to dinner or the game. I’m heading down to Mason County. A security guard at the Grisham Mill got killed by some kind of animal.” He explains to us.

“An animal?” Bella asks, confused.

“You’re not in Phoenix anymore, honey. They’ve been hunting it for a week with no luck. Thought I’d lend a hand.” He puts it simply. “Be careful.” We say in unison.

“Always am.”

“And thank you for the tires.”

I’d thought by now they wouldn’t be so awkward with each other but I am very wrong. The tension is so thick it couldn’t even be cut with a knife.

Change of pov

Rain was still hitting hard. Eric and Bella walk together into Biology. She brushes off her coat as he talks. “And yeah, prom committee is a chick thing, but I gotta cover it for the paper anyway and they need a guy to help choose the music. So I need your playlist.” Eric explains but before the girl can respond Mike comes up behind her. “Come on, Arizone. Give it up for the rain.” He shakes his wet baseball cap onto Bella’s head.

“Terrific.” She walks away, ignoring them to get to her seat.

She freezes once she notices Edward. She straightens her posture, striding to the shared table confidently. Dropping her books in front of him, ready to address him but instead he looks up at her and speaks.

“Hello.”

She stops, automatically stunned. “I didn’t have a chance to introduce myself last week. My name is Edward Cullen.”

She’s too shocked to respond, she wasn’t expecting him to talk to her. “You’re Bella.” He stares, not questioning.

“I’m… yes.” She finally sits, feeling stupid.

He abruptly moves to the edge of his seat away from her. She’s baffled to say the least, smelling her hair as if she stinks.

“Onion root tip cells! That’s what’s on your slides. Separate and label them into the phases of mitosis. The first partners to get it right win the golden onion!” Mr. Molina holds up a gold spray painted onion but disappointed by the little to no reaction.

“Come on people, tick tock.”

Everyone gets to work. Edward pushes the microscope towards Bella, still keeping a distance.

“Ladies first.” She grabs it defensively and snaps the first slide in, adjusting the lens. “You’ve been gone.”

“Out of town. Personal reasons.” He was curt like her, short with his answers.

“Prophase.” She says, going to remove the slide. “May I look?” She slides the scope to him, he looks into it. “Prophase.”

“Like I said.”

He writes it down on the work sheet. He takes a deep breath, turning to her. “Enjoying the rain?”

“Seriously? You’re asking me about the weather?” She seems offended. “It appears.”

“No, unlike my sister I don’t like the cold, or the wet. Or the grey. Or the parkas. Or the turtlenecks.”

There was a small smile that played on his lips.

He actually seemed interested in what she had to say. He studies her like her sister did to him days ago. But she can’t tell if he despises her or not. “What?”

He shakes his head and turns to the microscope, switching out the slides. She continues to stare at him, appreciating his evident beauty. His cheekbones to his lips.

“Anaphase.” She snaps out of her daze to go back to giving a dry look.

“May I?” She mocks him for before, looking into the lens.

“Anaphase.”

“Like I said.”

They change the slide.

“If you hate the cold and rain, why move to the wettest place in the continental U.S.?” He quizzes her.

“It’s complicated.” Simple answer, but he’s intrigued so he pushes.

“I think I can keep up.” She looks at him quickly then looking away back at the scope. He seems to be paying attention very intently.

“My mother remarried.” Another simple response.

“Very complex. So you don’t like him.” A statement, he doesn’t question himself.

“Phil is fine. Young for her but nice enough.” She tells. “Interphase.”

At the end of school she’s still holding the golden onion. She bumps into Edward on accident. “Why didn’t you stay with your mom and step dad? Or your sister?” He waits patiently for her to say something, studying her like before.

“Alright, Phil’s a minor league baseball player, so he travels a lot. My mother stayed home with me and [Name] but it made her unhappy. And my sister has always been a daddy’s girl. So I decided to spend time with my father too.” She explains everything. “But now you’re unhappy.” He states himself again.

“No I… I just.” She turns away, embarrassed.

Back to You

At the end of the day I stood beside Angela and Jessica. Since our game was today I don’t see a point in going all the way home just to come back to the school.

I watch my sister head for her truck, shivering. Once she got there she looked back, making little eye contact with me and then staring at the Cullens. More specifically, Edward? I think that’s his name if I’m remembering correctly.

Their eyes met then there was a loud screech only getting louder by the second. A van skids out of control, heading right for my older sister.

I felt frozen for a second, running over there immediately. The van comes to a complete stop after spinning out. Like something forcefully stopped it. I didn’t see anything as it had happened so fast. The van had only hit the back of the truck, leaving a dent that was definitely noticeable to the eye.

After milliseconds everyone went berserk, roaring into screams of trying to get help, calling 911.

Mike and Eric yell if she’s okay, I watched Edward who was once at his Volvo now leaving the scene. Wanting to ask him what happened I shake my head, pushing the two boys out of my way. “Bells, Bella?!” I cried out, falling down to her level, feeling the pain in my knees from earlier but ignoring it. I took her into my arms as she was obviously in shock.

I ended up driving her and the boy who crashed into her, Tyler a ride to the hospital.

I told him to shut up on our way there. Even sitting in the room as they got checked up on I sat there glaring at him.

Minutes later, Charlie rushes in. “Bells, are you alright?“

“I’m fine dad, calm down.” She assures gun but it’s not enough. “I’m so sorry Bella. I tried to stop.” Tyler apologizes.

“It’s okay Tyler.” Bella tells him and I scoff. “It sure as hell is not okay.” Charlie says, I nod agreeing. “Dad it’s not his fault.”

“We nearly lost you.”

“But you didn’t.” She says, I pull her into a hug since Dad is glaring at Tyler like I once was. “You can kiss your license goodbye.” He sternly tells the boy and I watch his body falter.

I notice Dr. Cullen approach us and if I didn’t know anything I would’ve thought he was a movie star. I didn’t pay Trenton to what they were talking about. I focused on his face, observing him as he talked. Just like I did with his foster kids. Then I heard Tyler apologizing once again, since I was closest I closed the curtain getting a fist bump from my dad.

“It would’ve been a lot worse if Edward hadn’t knocked me out of the way.” Bella says ignoring dad and I’s antics.

“Edward? Your boy?” Charlie asks only to not get a response.

Dr. Cullen adverts his eyes, I watch Bella press. I’m guessing she knew something that was making him uncomfortable. “It was amazing he got to me so fast. He was nowhere near me.”

The blonde man smiles.

“As long as you’re safe.”

We leave the treatment area. “I just have to sign some paperwork. You better call your mom.” He points to Bella.

“You told her?! She’s probably freaking out!” He just shrugs and walks off.

She pulls her phone out and I laugh, earning an eye roll. Then we both look down the hall, hearing an argument. “Stay here.” She orders as if I was so much younger than her. She gets a little closer to whatever was happening.

Not meaning to but the curiosity getting the best of me I do the same thing.

“This isn’t about you. It’s about all of us.” It was Rosalie. I raise an eyebrow but Dr. Cullen definitely saw Bella, taking Rosalie inside his office.

I sit for a moment, but I see Bella talking to Edward so I just walk the other way, pulling out my phone as I felt it vibrating.

It’s Jacob calling, shit.

I answered it quickly. I forgot all about my Volleyball game that’s in… 35 minutes.

“Hello?” I spoke to,

“Hey, where are you? Are you okay? I heard something about an accident with you and Bella?” He freaks out, i why shush him trying to calm him down.

“Hey, everything is fine. No damage was done. Bella was apart if it but no scratches, just a bump on the head. I’m sorry I should’ve called.” I told him, hugging my self with my open arm.

“Oh, I’m glad you’re both okay, I’m glad shes okay.” He sighs like he had just been holding in a long breath.

“Yeah, yeah. Everything is good. I’m just going to keep watch on Bella for a little. Could you let my coach know what happened. I’m sure she knows but y’know?”

“Totally understand, I will let her know. Call me later tonight?” He sounded hopeful and I smile to myself.

“Of course, I’ll call around 9.” I say

“Can’t wait…”

“Knock it off.”

I was going to ask what he meant by that but I hear the other guys in the background and I laugh.

I hung up, not seeing Bella come up to me, she grabbed my shoulder causing me to jump and almost drop my phone.

“Who was that?”

“Jacob. He asked if we were okay since he went to my game as usual. Seeing I wasn’t there freaked him out.” I take a deep breath through my nose.

“I completely forgot about that. We can still make it.” She says in a hurried tone but I shake my head.

“Coach wouldn’t let me play anyway. There’s no point.” I laugh, putting a hand on her arm.

“I’m sorry.” She frowns.

“No need, you should call mom though.”

She whines to herself, pulling her phone out again.

Charlie walks out and we go outside. I drove the truck home.

Later that night I call Jacob like I told him I would. He tells me about the game since they stayed due to Quil wanting to.

“It would’ve been a better game with you for sure.” He says and I could hear the smile.

“I know, I’m just so amazing.” I brag, playing with my tongue piercing as I hear his laugh.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have boasted your ego.”

“What ego?” I jokingly say.

I look over to my clock, seeing the time and it was already 11:30.

I was surprised Charlie hadn’t come and told me to go to bed.

“Ah, we should go to bed.” I start to say, I heard a small thump from Bella’s room upstairs and I stood up carefully strutting towards the door.

“[Name]?” Jacob calls, I snap out of whatever trance I was in. Not hearing anything else from Bella’s room so I go back to my bed.

“Sorry I got distracted. Goodnight, Jake.” My voice was a little raspy from being tired.

“Goodnight.” He ends up hanging up the phone and I lay back in my bed.

Thinking about everything that happened today.

Chapter three, edited.

[jevilowo]

TEAM ASCENDED FORTRESS 2

An AU by me in which the mercs ascend to their ultimate forms

Oh God tumblr wrecked the quality-

More about the AU under the cut!

WOKE SCOUT: she started taking estrogen and instead of fixing her it made her worse. She gets into fights on twitter about neopronouns and has successfully cancelled everyone she doesn't like at least once. However, as cancel culture isn't real, this only lasted about three seconds for each. She managed to pull Ms Pauling also which is pretty cool.

SOLDIERSUNE MIKU: the ghost of Shakespearicles told him to dress as Miku and redo the salem witch trials. Only knowing one witch (Merasmus), he finished this quickly and now roams the country with Zhanna (who is now Zhannagane Miku after Mikus metal counterpart) spreading malice and wonder through the power of AMERICAN SONG COVERS. He uses a wig for the Miku effect, but is working on growing his hair out also.

MITOSIS: Pyro and Engie were shagging one time and they came so hard they did mitosis. Now theres 23 babey Pyros (count em) and Engineer is a single dad. There's a lot of Pyro Mitosis Lore™ in my head, but the basics are that they evolve into either humanoid, beastial, demonic or celestial Pyros eventually.

TAVISH, KING OF THE LOCH NESS: he did it he blew up that bloody sea monster and now he is king of Loch Ness. The self loathing has died down a lot which is great for him but his body is still a scrumpty distillery which is eh. Still, he has funky water powers and his partners Soldiersune and Zhannagane come to visit often.

KEEPER OF TIME AND SPACE GUY: Heavy was mad, he knew he'd been had so he shot at the sun with a gun. Instead of being a show off like that bitch Juno, he had a nice philosophical conversation and chess match with Time and impressed Time so much he was appointed as the guardian of Time and Time's partner, Space. His guns (the six angel thingies pictured) can turn into celestial weapons which helps in the protecting but people don't shoot at the sun so often so its a relaxing enough gig really.

GODDAMMIT ENGIE: after realising how much more efficient Gunslinger was than a lame ass human hand, Engie succumbed to his hubris and eventually replaced all his body parts with robot parts. Including his dick which led to the Mitosis Incident. Anyway. His chest is a dispenser which makes projects pretty convenient and he has a mini-sentry attached to each arm and leg, making him a walking weapon. This did not help with the god complex, but it helps with the single father thing.

THE INFERNAL DOCTOR: Medic kept attaching more souls to his own and selling them to Satan for power. Satan got so sick of this eventually he attempted to beat the shit out of Medic. By now Medic was slightly more powerful than Satan so this ended with Medic absorbing Satan's powers and basically taking his place. Somehow, his relationship with the guy who is now a celestial being was unaffected by this. If they really tried they could probably ascend even further. To godhood, perhaps. In any case, Medic becoming The Devil from The Bible did nothing for the god complex.

???: Sniper just kind of fucked off into the woods one day god knows what happened to him but Scout's convinced she saw him for like three seconds a week ago and "YOU GUYS HE HAD ANTLERS I SWEAR-"

RETIRED AND BECAME A FUNCTIONING MEMBER OF SOCIETY SPY: yeah. He's very happy with Scout's Mother (Maureen), and he's letting his roots grow out (his spy agency made him dye his hair black). He's even making an effort to be a good parent to Scout, bought her the trans flag ipad cover and everything, but she just keeps trying to cancel him. Maureen's sure they'll work it out between themselves eventually, but until then she has to keep finding more secure hiding places for the ipad (the best so far was the time she buried it under a tree a mile away, took Scout at least four hours to find and retrieve it that time)

There's also YURI MS PAULING, in which she pulled a whole polycule of beautiful women, but I'll cover her in another post.

Also TERFS DNI please. Woke Scout is just Scout being Scout (which is to say a bit stupid), and assuming all trans women are like that would be ridiculous. So fuck off.

[minimal-effort-name]

Cool, I had the horrors!

Had a good dream last night :}

[quitealotofsodapop]

I just had a thought- Spicynoodles in the MKEgged AU would probably want to wait for a bit before giving Haoyu a bio sibling, both because of the initial fear that his pregnancy gave them and because Xiaotian's body needs time to heal because Stone Monkeys aren't really built for multiple pregnancies.

But that doesn't mean they can't adopt!

Now I'm imagining my idea ages ago of Spicynoodles kiddos, but a few are adopted. I did conceptualize them before I thought of Stone Eggs

First set of babus were; Xuancao & Yingsu [#1 & #2], Zishan, Shuixian & Chuju [#3, #4 & #5]. Origin Post.

Then came "Iron Fan drawn from memory" Tiemian [#6]. Origin Post.

Then "You sure Tang didn't just mitosis?" Yinghuo [#7]. Origin post.

And then the "Rambutan babies" Muxi & Mudan [#8 & #9]. Origin Post.

+some unspecified future triplets, and the occasional inclusion of bud's @nem0lux3 oc Hua Jiao!

I can now imagine with Haoyu's creation being unusual + his birth not ideal - MK and Red Son would be more open to adoption than creating a fresh Egg.

MK is hanging out with Nezha - tagging along for the Lotus Prince's regular god-duties of blessing newborns and kids on their birthdays; only for them to encounter an abandoned baby.

Haoyu has been asking for a baby sibling so...

(*MK approaches his and Red's shared home in the city, nervously holding the tiny stray baby in a sling. The baby has reddish-auburn hair, and dark skin that reminds him of his spouse - little vitiligo-like stripes mark her skin. MK breathes deep to psyche himself up before entering.*) MK, walking in: "Heyyy Red, don't be mad, buuuut when I was out with Nezha we-" (*MK stops suddenly at the sight in the living room. Red Son looks a mix of flustered, horrified and hopeful, as he rocks a baby demon in a car seat.*) Red Son & MK: "..." MK: "How about you go first?" Red Son: "Thank you. I was visiting my father's parents in Youdu, and when I brought up the possibility of us adopting a child, they mentioned that the Underworld has a pretty large population of unclaimed young souls so..." (*Red Son guestures to the baby in the car seat; it's a little girl with dark brown hair and skin tone similar to MK. Seems to be mixed human-feline demon.*) MK, realising: "Aw! You thought she looked like me and couldn't even wait to ask?" Red Son, adoring: "Yes! I met with Kṣitigarbha, and they brought me to the banks of the River by Naihe Bridge, and this little angel just... floated to the shore." (*Red Son gently kisses the baby's head*) Red Son: "They said that it's how little ones... enter the Underworld before they have the chance to be blessed. Their souls come to shore when they find someone to claim them." MK, leaning down to meet the baby: "Ohhh, a little floater baby. Hi!" Baby #1: (*barely old enough to smile. makes curious burbling sounds at MK and the other baby in his arms. Her hands have tiny claws, betraying her mixed demon heritage.*) Red Son, fixing on MK's baby: "What's the story with your little one?" MK: "Well now my story seems boring by comparison! Nezha has been helping train my astral projection powers, and he asked me to come along with him in spirit while he did his baby blessings. All was okay - I saw a lot of 100 day parties. But then Nezha got this look on his face, and we like swooped down to this riverbank where-" Baby in MK's arms: (*angry kitten-like sound*) MK, soothing her: "Yeah, baby, I'm telling them... She was all alone and... they tied her up in a bag. A bag, Red!" (*becoming distressed*) "Nezha was only able to sense her cus she just turned a month old and didn't have her Man Yue blessing. If we hadn't found her then-" Red Son, calming him: "Do not think about the buts, sunflower. She's with us now." MK, tear of relief: "Heh. Butts." Red Son, small laugh: "Puerile as ever... have you taken her to a doctor?" MK: "Even better! Your other grandma saw us after me and Nezha had her checked out by Chen Jiggu - you know the paediatric goddess? When I mentioned Haoyu wanted a sibling well... you know Xiwangmu." Red Son: "She shriek-roared, burst into tears, and started hugging you and the baby?" MK: "Yup. I could barely get a word out. She's already started calling her sūnnǚ and demands we organise a proper Man Yue party for her." Red Son: "I hope she feels the same for the stray I acquired."

After tending to both babies, the pair notice that they have eerily similar features to one another... as if they were twins or close relatives. They try not to dwell too much on the possible reasons.

Within a few hours, news of babies Xuancao (named for a flower of remembrance; Poppy) & Yingsu (their little Tiger-Lily who's stripes have only just developed) gets out.

Haoyu arrives home after spending the day with Granddadsy and Gonggong Tang to see a pair of baby sisters in his old crib. He's overjoyed and accidentally wakes them in his delighted hooting (much to MK and Red's dismay).

Pigsy and Tang had been there to drop Haoyu off, and they quickly recognise the little cries that followed the hooting. The poor pig man nearly has a heart attack XD

Pigsy, pointing at the baby girls: "Since when!?" MK, holding one twin: "Haha - would you believe less than a few hours ago?" Tang, joking: "Wow. You two worked fast." Red Son, holding the other twin: "They were not made in that manner!" Pigsy & Tang: "Huh?" Haoyu, excitedly: "Oh! I know! Lǎolao says babies float on the Underworld's river, and they get out when they meet their parents!" Tang: "Well, it's not exactly-" Red Son: "He's actually right in this case." Tang: "EH!?" MK, gesturing to the respective twin: "Underworld freebie. Above-world freebie!" Haoyu, smiling smugly: "Told you, Gonggong!!" Pigsy & Tang: (*both thinking hard*) Pigsy, shrugging: "Eh. I literally picked MK off the street. Finding one or two on the river ain't that odd. Now - let me meet my granddaughters." Both Babies: (*excitedly reach out tiny hands to inspect their grandadsy's face*)

MK and Red Son's phones are quickly blowing up with calls and messages asking "WTF!? Since when you two were pregnant?!" Wukong in particular calls worried out of his mind, asking if MK is ok and getting medical attention. Seems that a wire got crossed with Xiwangmu bragging about her new grandcub to who anyone who'd listen. XD

The bull grandparents, all three great-grandparents, and the extended Monkie Kids gang, happily accept the twin girls into their lives once the Spicynoodles couple finally manages to explain what happened.

Macaque: "You ordered one and got two. A great deal, in my opinion." MK, teasingly: "You're just saying that cus you managed to have twins too." Wukong, holding Rumble & Savage: "It's a fantastic deal either way!"

DBK and PIF in particular are overjoyed. They understand that a biological grandcalf is a huge risk to ask of the couple - so they happily accept the baby girls as if they were blood related anyway. PIF can finally spoil her girls with all the little dresses and accessories they could ever want. And DBK has a pair of tiny girls who have him wrapped around their little clawed fingers.

Any future spicynoodles babies likely have similar origin stories. At least one is a biologically-conceived child, though it's hard to tell when're all together and acting like they've always been together.

The whole family will fight whoever claims they aren't "real" children to them.