#help jm so tired.

[suguren]

just the lonley talking again

albedo x reader

word #; 1.82k

warnings; rushed, angst, major character death i think... albedo is an asshole here :pp pre sucrose

a/n; i wrote this at likeee 3 am sooo bare with me it's not the best...

art creds; azhiichigo on twt

albedo always struggled to understand human emotions. how they felt and why they felt certain things. why did it make them upset if it rained? it'll pass. why did they care if their loved ones passed? it was inevitable, they all do eventually.

happiness, sadness, anger, and especially love were difficult for him to wrap his head around. what was the point of it all?

maybe it was the way you would smile at him so affectionately when delivering the needed ingredients for his next experiment, your hands lingering on his for a second longer than needed when you passed them to him. setting the pinecones and what-not onto his desk ever so gently with that lovely grin on your lips. you never hesitated to lend an extra hand when he was conducting his experiments; you were always so happy to help. even if it wore you out, no matter what you'd come back even better than ever like you always do. why did you care so much? you'd go through extreme lengths to help him out when he could easily do it himself in a shorter amount of time. when he would ask you upfront, you'd just shrug and tell him,

"because i want to."

why? wouldn't it be inconvenient for you? you're straining yourself on purpose simply because you 'want to. it didn't make sense to him whatsoever.

so, when he's been failing his recent experiments, working consistently 24/7 to try to figure out where it all went wrong. you can tell he's stressed out. he'd have noticeable eyebags, sighing constantly, and his cold fingers were always combing through his blond locks nearly taking his ponytail out with each time; you thought it would be a good idea to get him a gift.

you wanted to give him a gift that would be memorable. nothing too extravagant, just something to remind him of you. you've known him for long enough, surely it'll be easy to get him something that'll last help him feel better. you tried so hard, traveled so far, going from mondstadt to inazuma. unfortunately it was harder than you thought it would be. what do you get the man who can make whatever he wanted when he wanted? somthing rare of course! something that you could only make yourself...

a ballad, and a bouquet. not just any bouquet however, a bouquet of materials that living beings dropped when they're destroyed.you contained all of them in a small box, carrying it with you as you traveled through teyvat. It took a while longer than you thought, but when you finally finished, you headed back home and decided to assemble it in your room.

you climbed the icy slopes of dragonspine, the cool air nipping at your skin like pins and needles. your hands were stiff and numb, your legs shook and trembled with every step you took in the deep snow. but it was all worth it, every last second was worth it. he was worth everything. you panted softly, your breath spreading small puffs through the thick air.

"care to tell me where you disappeared off to?"

he worked so diligently, no doubt that he forgot to take care of his own needs. his hair was completely disheveled and his skin pale as ever. he looked beyond frustrated, the tips of his fingers were red and from your point of you, there were small blisters growing. your voice strained from your harsh and hazardous efforts to get to his lab.

"a-lbedo..."

the sudden break of your voice pierced through the air like a gunshot, it made him shudder and he took in a deep breath, his tone not nearly as calm and patient as you were used to. he looked in your direction, his eyes glaring through yours as if you spat in his face.

guilt rose in your throat like a mint in a coke. you hadn't realized how he felt without any assistance, how long have you been gone exactly? maybe a few days at most... maybe longer? what does it matter anyway, you're here now and isn't that what mattered the most?

your head hung low as you stared at the stone ground, a few snowflakes danced inside and disappeared from the heat. you walked slowly towards him and nudged the bouquet towards him, a tense grin tugging on the corner of your lips. "i got you a gift, to help you feel better, i know you've been really stressed lately and i wanted to cheer you up."

a smile, a thank you, or even a pat on the back would have sufficed. but instead he snatched the bouquet from your hands and disassembled it, he didn't hesitate to rip off the ribbons you oh so carefully tied on. he spared no glance to the letter you placed inside to give him motivation. he dissected your hard work in ten times the

speed it took you to assemble it.

"this will do, you can leave."

your eyes stared deeply into the nape of his neck, watching as his blond hair ghosted over his pale skin, searching for an explanation, a symbol of gratitude, anything that showed you that he was at least thankful for your efforts. but nothing met your inarticulate expression. so you did as he had asked you to, walking out of the lab with tears threatening to slip through your eyelashes.

you had stomped through the snow, tripping over your feet every now and then, the hot liquid evidence of your emotions blurring your vision. your jaw trembled and clacked, you were unable to feel a single bone in your body. has dragonspine always been this cold? were the winds ever as harsh as they were now? wait, where are you? this wasn't the path from albedos lab. realization struck you like a lighting bolt to a steel rod.

you were lost in a blizzard.

you were too far from albedo to call for him, your voice was too weak anyway, hell nearly everything was weak. there's no going back, no going further. you were stuck here. and unfortunately, this would be where you rest for eternity. the wind blew harder with every second, at some point, pushing your stiff and cold body into the snow. maybe if you weren't so weak and useless, you would've gotten out of here by now. maybe if you tried harder to please him, tried harder to help him.

maybe in another life.

[spuffyfet]

i have a fire tf2 oc idea but the demons dont let me know how to draw👿👿👿👿

[bandomgay]

The post concert everything has Hit the 2nd tower

[maythray]

like yo did we for real just skip over the part where i flat out said i was suicidal because of this. why am i still being forced to do this shit with no accommodation. let me go let me go let me go

[kanmom51]

Bringing back Only then

I've been missing Jikook so very much and watching song edits, cause why not, right?

And Only then, that is one that is on repeat for me.

JK's cover of this song is so damn good.

And I'm sitting there eating my breakfast (tmi of the day?) and watching the edit and reading the lyrics again and it just clicks in my brain.

Obviously those lyrics and JK's choice to cover the song and his unbelievably emotional singing that just draws you in is not something new. This song meant something to him, way back in 2018. Let's not forget that he released his cover for White day 2018, surprise surprise. Yeah, White day. We know what he was doing on White day 2023...

March 2018, following Jikook's Tokyo trip. March 2018, when members were rethinking if, what, where and how to continue as BTS, as artists.

This one wasn't written by him, but it sure meant A LOT to him!!!

Those lyrics.

They meant everything back then in 2018.

But now. In 2024. Looking back at the two of them, and even more so at the last 3 years, these words, they hit me like a freight train.

The lyrics.

Their past.

Their present.

Their future.

The way to love me isn’t hard Just hold me tight like you are now

We don’t know what will happen to us later But I like that nothing’s decided

Who cares what others say? We can’t live without each other, so what’s the problem? We can be more in love together

I can't...

These lines hit even harder now that we know what they went through in 2023 (well, part of what they went through, but we did see on live just how affected JK was), and to what lengths they went to not be separated during their military service.

But this isn't the end of it.

Because the next lines repeat that sentiment.

If you start to like someone else If I get used to not being with you When that time comes, when it’s that time Only then we can break up

And obviously, that ain't happening any time soon.

Nope, not happening...

Not at all.

Oh, and back to this again...

This song, it's lyrics, they just hit so hard.

The way to love you isn’t hard If I smile once more and care for you more

Clip credit to @ nuri  நூரி

The way we love isn’t hard If we look at each other like it’s the first time every time

Whether you want it or not, I’m going to hold onto you When I get too tired that I can’t even walk When that time comes, when it’s that time Only then we can break up Only then we can break up

Now I am definitley ugly crying. Bawling my eyes out.

I miss them so much.

😭���

[haedalkoo]

If you don't mind me asking, do you understand the conversation at the campsite in episode 1 after they get off the phone with suga? From the subtitles, immediately after getting off the phone, it goes:

JM: In some ways, I think its good I came here. If I didn't come here for this show, you wouldn't have traveled around and drank beer and what not.

JK: I'm obviously grateful you're here.

JM: I'm regretting this a lot.

JK: Its too late to regret. Just enjoy it.

And then it cuts to them in the cabin. I was just wondering if this makes more sense if you know korean because it felt kind of sudden and without context when I was watching. Like the mood feels kind of serious until jungkook says the last line and from what we hear/see, they weren't talking about anything regrettable before the conversation started and at that point, other than jungkook falling out of the kayak, nothing bad had really happened yet because jimin hadn't started fighting for his life from the 7 plagues. Thank you in advance!

Hi! Maybe the conversation makes more sense if you understand their tones. The translation provided by the show is very accurate! And obviously we can't know what they were talking about before or after the scene, it seems to be a cut. But Jimin was saying "the way I see it/no matter how I see it, it's good that I came here." JK says, "obviously, I'm grateful that you're here", like thanking him for the effort he made traveling all of those hours just to spend a couple days together.

Then, in a teasing tone, JM says he's starting to regret it. As viewers we don't know yet, but keep in mind he spent the entire day going to the bathroom and he was probably really tired/jet-lagged. Hell was about to rain down on him lmao. And from one of their conversations (I think it's when they're making commentary sitting in chairs) we know Jimin was considering whether it was a good idea to travel that far for so little just to film a show they hadn't planned at all. They didn't even have a name!

JK's reply to that is so cute, his tone is so?? kinda flirty? a little bratty? "it's too late for regrets." It sounds like he could've been sticking his tongue out at Jimin. So, I don't think it was a super serious conversation or anything, it seemed pretty lighthearted to me from the way they were speaking.

I hope this helps !!!

[stormblessed95]

I sent a timeline into the op, I’ve removed the speculations, so hope this helps some

2023

JM dior show Paris 20th  jan 23 with Hobi 

JM album face promo Feb/march 23

JK visits him at dance practice BB probably Feb time 

1/2 jk goes live bam there 

This is the live where Tae makes him do a instagram live 

3/2 JM live from company late evening 

Same night Jk goes live and JM in comments Jk invites him for fried chicken

Same live where he says Jimins name and bam reacts and runs to the door 

10/2 JM live talks about jk, sings euphoria and talks about acting in photo shoots, 

11/2 jk live at boxing JM comments 

18/2 JM joins Hobi on his bday live at company 

Hobi had said he sees Jimin a lot at company and they play cards 

28/2 jk live talks about going to work and JM is in comments 

4/3 jk goes live gets tipsy 

6/3 JM live at company 

9/3 Yoongi bday, JM records himself watching the live, jk comment on Weverse about marry me thing 

13/3 JM flies to nyc 

Films day with vogue and practice for fallon

And fallon 

14/3 jk. X3 part live on white day- JM abroad but comments- leaves spoiler for smfp2 video teaser at midnight 

19/3 Jimin arrives in Korea 

24/3 Face is released 

24/3 JM on jimmy fallon show not live 

Jk goes love cooking 

27/3 JM goes on suchwita 

28/3 JM live jk spams comments- promos for face are done says to jk that it’s finished, jk says time flies 

28/3 writes I miss you on Weverse , jk replies me too, 

After jk goes live and watches Jimin content including suchwita 

Around early hours- JM replies see you soon the live is cute

29/3- Jimin Weverse live for face 

Late march- all member meal 

31/3- JM on music bank 

2/4 JM on ingagayo 

4th April- JM bb hot 100 live- jk is sleeping comment

8/4 Hobi and Tae go to JKs house and go on Weverse live 

8/4 jk flies to USA 

11/4- JM and Yoongi in weird YouTube show

16/4 jk at cochella 

17/4 Jk arrives home 

19th April - Hobi’s enlistment - epic hug moment 

They were together the night before 

Astro member died 19/4 pm

25/4 JM flies to nyc 

25/4 Jk and Tae attend dream premiere jk comes live straight after it late 

25/4 jk live seems sad and tired and says he is both,,cooks on live

JM had flown to NYC that day 

28/4 Jimin at Tiffany event nyc 

29/4 Jimin at d day concert usa

Jk at lv event in Seoul with Mingyu 

30/4 JM live with Yoongi 

During this time recording Who…

6/5 JM arrives in Korea 

23/5 JM goes to London and HP world

24/5 JK went live , sang angel

27/5 JM arrives home -

5th June Jk live talks about rainy day fight 

Watched Jimin on lee mijun show (sings along to like crazy ) 

12/6 jk falls asleep on live 

13/6 JM letter live for festa 

14/6 jk flying to la

15/6 JM live talks about rainy day fight 

Recording Muse that day too 

22/6 jk arrived home 

Late june- yoongis dday tour attendance Seoul 25th JM and jk 

29/6 jk live working out

1/7 JKs brother posts a pic of family game night ft JMs hand

4/7 jk 4am live with Mingyu 

July seven release 

JK flies to NYC -12/13?

JM flies out next day 13th

14/7 seven is released 

Go missing in NY state for 4 days - Ays filming

18/7 JM flies home 

24/7 jk arrived home from London 

25/7 JM posts about jk bb hot 100

27/7 jk goes live sings letter by Jimin at end 

28/7 - July when they come back from NYC- JKs epic in bed begging JM live 

30/7 jk inkagayo music show v visits him 

Celebrate hot 100  

August - jeju island trip ? Spotted by fans 

12th august- JK in Tokyo with Eunwoo??

3rd august JM d day concert 

3/8 jk goes live 

4th august jk d day concert 

5th august Weverse live JK

23rd and 24th august jk spotted in Busan with Eunwoo and Mingyu eating out 

September - 1/9- JM shirtless pic for JKs birthday 

Jk attends Tiffany even in Seoul. Comes live afterwards….. wearing watch set to JKs. Birthday time.

jK must have prepared 3D content in September 

He must have filmed suchwita on 3/9 ish 

5/9 jk flies to la 

9/9 jk arrived home from la 

12/9 jk flies to nyc

15/9 JM supported v at music show 

16/9 jk arrived home 

Jikook meal with Yoongi at some point ? Spotted but Jimin kind of confirmed this in mmm

21/9 jk flies to nyc 

25/9 jk arrived home 

28/9 chusseouk - JM posts pic on Instagram of whale cloud drawing saying jk did it 

29/9 jk releases 3d 

JM posts single cover 😅 with this emoji

4/10 jk live talked about Jeon Jimin 

Played like crazy x2 and smfp2 and other members songs

Had hung out with 97 friends that day

6/10 jk flies to la 

10/10 jk arrived home 

13 October- JM birthday live days Jk busy makes sad face and such concern 

13/10 jk music bank 

Around here JM Weverse interview said he has been spending time alone which if Jk was gone to 3D he would be 

14/10 jk flies to Budapest 

Oct- Tae posts pics of him and Jikook in jeju from?? 

20/10 jk arrived home 

23/10 jk at ck event Japan 

29/10- JMs production diary live- JK comes on for a minute 

Jm has golden hair…

They found out days before this about the enlistment 

Late October- 30/10 JM fan even

Mini moni music filming he has blonde hair 

3/11 jk live talking about Golden

Tae and JM live outside JKs house

November 4th- golden release 

&& Release party we only know bc JM posts photos 

5/11 jk flies to nyc

11/11 jk arrived home 

15/11- mini moni p2 filming 

16/11 JM flies to Budapest to film who mv 

17/11 ish JM stuck with you this is Jimin dance cover 

19/11 JM arrives home 

20/11 golden live in Seoul 

JM commented that hate you is his fave song

Rm attended 

Around here JM was spotted filming at a hot springs which we now know isn’t one and was a location for his jimmy fallon appearance 22/7/24

22/11- JM records sgmb track video 

Possibly fallon performance too given spotting date posts 

23/11 - they go to Japan together for about a week 

28/11 they arrive home from Japan 

29/11 jk flies to la 

2/11 jk arrived home 

5/12 - jk,JM,v,rm last live before enlistment very touchy feely 

JM said he’d been sick after Japan 

12/12- both at v and rms enlistment 

13/12- they enlisted  together in the buddy system

Very watered down, but I *think* (can't be 100% sure without going and looking everything up right now, but it looks good) totally accurate timeline of Jikook activities through 2023

[1-beansss-1]

~ Feverish ~

Simon petrikov x gn!reader

Brief summary - you have a bad fever, and Simon comes over and cares for you.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

You woke up feeling terrible, your nose was stuffy, your throat was sore, you were shivering, you sat up putting your arms around yourself for warmth, you got up and walked to the bathroom, you did your normal morning routine, you looked in the mirror.

"I feel like shit.. I look like it, too.."

You said, your voice was hoarse and you audibly sounded stuffy.

"Sound like shit..."

You said and yawned a bit. You went out to the kitchen where you had a meditation cabinet. You pulled out a thermometer and took your temperature.

"Holly.. I'm going back to bed.."

You were running a high fever, luckily you always had medicine just in case you were sick. You took some for your stuffy nose but didn't have anything that helped a fever.. you sighed and walked back into your room. You laid down and pulled the covers over you. You felt very cold. You suddenly remembered that you made plans with simon for later in  the day, You grabbed your phone that was on the bedside table and texted simon

'Hey, Im so sorry to camcel but jm very sick rn.. I have a hih fever'

You started to fall asleep as you typed. You sent it without noticing the typos and fell asleep. You woke up to your phone ringing, you answered

"..hello?"

You were groggy still and felt a little woozy due to the fever. You rubbed your eyes and yawned.

"I saw your message.. are you alright?"

Simon answered, and he sounded slightly worried.

"I'm fine.."

You said as you fell back asleep, you still had your phone up to your ear.

"You sound tired.. try to get some rest, ok?"

He said and heard quite snoring from his phone. He smiled and let out a small sigh.

"... You already are.... sweet dreams.."

He said, hanging up the phone. Simon finished up with his exhibit, closing it early. He started to walk to your house and on the way he started to think about making you soup. He walked over to the nearest market and bought all the ingredients he needed.

He got to your house and opened the door. He walked inside, making sure he was quiet so he would disturb you. He walked to the kitchen and started to cook. He cut up the vegetables and boiled some water, humming as he cooked.

You woke up to the smell of food and walked out to the kitchen. You were still half asleep. You walked up to simon and put your arms around him.

"..Mmm... I love you.."

You mumbled, pressing your body against him. Simon's face turned bright red when you said that,

You clearly meant it in a platonic way, right?

Simon thought and started to overthink. He had been battling his feelings for you for a while, only recently entertaining the idea in his head.

The sound of you snoring quietly snapped him out of thought.

"You poor thing.."

Simon said, turning around. He had an arm around you so you wouldn't fall over.

"You're that sick, huh?"

He looked at you. He looked concerned. He didn't know how you were sleeping standing up. He picked you up and started to carry you back to bed.

You woke up, confused. You couldn't tell if this was a dream or not.

"simonnn..I..I don't feel good.."

You whined.

"I know...I know.."

He said, putting you down in the bed and pulling the covers around you. He put his hand on your face, rubbing your cheek with his thumb. He quickly pulled away when he realized what he was doing and stood up.

"I gotta go back to the stove.. I'll be back soon, ok?"

He said with a gentle smile. You grumbled a bit and frowned, you were pouting.

He blushed slightly. You were being way too cute for him.

"Go to sleep. You won't even notice I'm gone"

You nodded, your eyes were already closed, and you quickly fell asleep. He sighed and walked out of your bedroom.

"Focus, simon! ...You're here to take care of them...."

He mumbled to himself as he returned to the stove. He focused back on cooking. He stirred the pot a bit and tasted it.

"Mm Almost ready.."

He said with a smile. He got a bowl down and waited for the soup to be done. When it was, he turned off the stove and scooped out some in a bowl. He grabbed you a spoon and walked into your room. He sat down the bowl on your bedside table and gently shook you awake.

"Hey... I made you some soup."

You whined slightly when he woke you up, and you sat up and rubbed your eyes.

He put some pillows behind you to prop you up. He handed you the bowl of soup. You grabbed it and hunched over it, putting the bowl closer to your face. Simon sat down at the foot of your bed watching you eat. He was worried about if you liked the soup or not. He looked at you, looking for an indicator that you liked it.

"Mmm.. good soup.."

You mumbled in-between bites. Simon sighed in relief. He was glad you liked it. When you were done, you sat it down on the bedside table. He got up and tried to grab the bowl, but you grabbed his wrist.

"Simon.. come here.."

You mumbled sleepily and squeezed his wrist slightly. You didn't want him to leave you alone.

He leaned on the bed and looked over at you.

"Yes?"

He said, tilting his head a bit. You grumbled, you wanted him closer.

"Simon.."

You whined, squeezing his wrist a bit more.

"What is it? Do you need something?"

He smiled sweetly. He found you calling him adorable.

You put your arms around him and pulled him in the bed. You were surprisingly strong in your feverish and loopy state.

"W-What are you doing?"

Simon said, falling on top of you. He caught himself so he would squish you.

You pulled him closer, making him lay on top of you. You just wanted some comfort when your whole body hurt and when you couldn't think.

Simon tried to gently move off of you. He thought he would make your fever worse, but you squeezed him tighter, not letting him move.

"Alright.. alright.."

He mumbled. He felt his cheeks burn. You nuzzled your head into his neck, making him even more flustered. You fell asleep, snoring slightly.

He started to think.

this is just platonic, right? No way you liked him.. friends did this all the time!

He convinced himself. He took his glasses off and put them on the bedside table. He closed his eyes, trying to go to sleep.

In the morning, you woke up, keeping your eyes closed. You grumbled slightly. You didn't wanna be awake. You felt that your fever had calmed down a bit. You were actually having coherent thoughts.

You were so loopy and out of it yesterday you could barely think. You couldn't remember if what happened yesterday was a dream or not.

You realized that something heavy was on your chest. You opened your eyes and looked down at Simon. Well, this part wasn't a dream. you blushed, feeling embarrassed about yesterday. Simon rolled off of you and sat up slowly. He rubbed his eyes. Simon looked over at you.

"How long have you been awake?"

He said in a sleepy voice. He looked over at you, squinting so he could see a little better.

"Uh.. couple of minutes..give or take.."

You said, sitting up on the bed, smiling at him.

"How's your fever...?"

"Better, I don't feel out of it anymore.. I can actually think"

You said, giggling a bit. He blinked, trying to wake up. He was thinking about what you said. It took him a bit to process it since he just woke up.

"Oh, that's great!"

He said as he woke up a bit more. You nodded, your face was still flushed.

He leaned closer to you.

"You're redder than yesterday.. are you sure you're alright?"

Your body stiffened as he got closer towards you. You leaned back in embarrassment.

"Yes.. well, I think I still have a slight fever, but it's not as bad?"

You laughed nervously. He leaned closer to you and put the back of his hand on your forhead. It wasn't as bad as yesterday, but you were still burning. He felt your cheek to check, too.

"Hmm.. your cheeks are hotter than your forhead... you should get more rest."

He said, his face full of concern. You nodded and laid back down. Simon got up and grabbed his glasses, putting them on. He turned to you and pulled the covers over you. He smiled and turned around to walk out the room.

"S-Simon...could...could you stay.. please? I know you stayed with me last night... but I don't want you to leave me.."

You looked at him with big pleading eyes.

He looked at you, his face was red. He couldn't say no to you, even if he wanted to. He nodded and walked over to the bed and sat down next to you.

"Thank you.."

You smiled at him and let out a sigh.

"..I'm sorry you have to stay.."

You said as your expression changed, you looked upset. Simon turned to look at you. He moved some hair out of your face.

"I don't have to stay.. I'm here because I want to.. because.."

He paused for a bit, he stopped himself from saying what he wanted. He was way too embarrassed to tell you what he was thinking.

"Uh... because I want to make sure you're alright.."

You smiled, he knew exactly what to say to make you feel better, he always knew. You yawned a bit and drifted off to sleep. He smiled at you. He gently ran his fingers through your hair. He enjoyed this closeness, but he started to think.

Was this fair to Betty? Was he betraying her by being this close to you? Was he taking advantage of you while you're sick?

He didn't even know if you liked him back. He put his hands on his head and let out a loud sigh.

In your sleep, you threw your arm on him, kinda slapping his chest, pulling him out of his own head. He chuckled a bit. It was almost like you knew he was overthinking.

He looked around the room and saw the bowl on the bedside table. He got up, and you grumbled a bit.

"I know.. I'll be back, I promise.."

He said and picked up the bowl. He walked out of the room. He put the bowl in the kitchen sink, and a bookshelf caught his attention. He walked over and ran a finger across the spines of the books. One caught his attention, and he picked it up. He walked back to your room and sat down next to you and started to read. You rolled over to him, putting your arms around him.

Mabye, it was alright to just stay like this with you.. just for a little while longer..

He thought to himself before he started to read again.

[cozyjae]

honey bear- n. jm 💞🎀

info: jaemin x reader, established relationship, domestic

wc: 2.0k 

a/n: i’m currently posting my old drafts! <3 i hope y’all enjoy 

You share a lot with Jaemin.

You have always shared a lot with Jaemin. It had always made sense, in a way; shared glances and smiles that morphed slowly and preciously into shared kisses in your shared bed and your shared mugs sitting next to each other in your shared kitchen.

Jaemin is naturally good at sharing. It was like second nature to him, to always happily extend anything he had to others. To extend his love, comfort, and attention to those who needed it, so often and thoughtlessly that he sometimes overextended his energy and gave out more than he received; coming home to flop onto your bed with tired eyes and open arms that irresistibly draw you in, his head finding your shoulder to squish his cheek against your shirt and wrap his arms around your waist. 

Jaemin really does like his job at a local day care. He’s an adolescent education major and began working as a teacher’s assistant there last year. It was a nice job with flexible hours, friendly coworkers, and really sweet kids; and he loved the ability to care for and nurture and the fast paced environment. 

Even when you first met Jaemin, you quickly realized his major and future career choice made total sense. He was so obviously ready to immediately share his love and attentiveness, filled to the brim with tenderness that he had no qualms about extending and giving to others. To you and many others, Jaemin encompassed and embodied a very precious skill and ability to continuously give and give. 

But Jaemin also really likes off time, rest, and the opportunity to be cared for. And after long days like today, where he had a full workload for school with two finals quickly approaching and an afternoon full of tired and restless children- he can only tiredly drag himself up your building's stairs with multi-colored marker stains on his hands and dried glitter glue somehow stuck on his shirt. 

For someone as usually loud and engaged as Jaemin, he still regularly needed the quietness and reassurance silence could offer, and sometimes- a lot of times, simply your presence was rejuvenating enough for him. 

You were always there to help him, to coax him into a warm bath or shower and comfier clothes and give to him whatever he needed, a dynamic that only you could ever offer. And for that reason, he’s excited to open your apartment door and mess with the fickle, old lock that needs replacing, to return to exactly what he needed.

Walking in, he immediately sees you at the kitchen table, pencil in hand trailing over one of many papers spread out before you, most likely studying for one of your upcoming finals. The apartment smells of the candle you bought a few weeks ago while out shopping together, smelling of fresh balsam and firewood. 

You look up and immediately smile as Jaemin drops his bag and coat by the front door and his keys in the bowl that you insist on keeping by the door, slipping off his shoes and lining them up neatly next to yours. By the time he finishes, you’re already next to him, hand sliding down his somehow sore back soothingly.  

“Long day?” You ask quietly, looking at Jaemin who watches you with glazed over eyes as he only nods, easily embracing you, fingers encircling around your waist and muttering something into your shirt that sounds vaguely like a yes. 

Jaemin’s fingers are cold from the long walk from the bus station to your apartment in the winter weather and it makes you reach for his hand to instinctively warm it.

You hum at Jaemin’s response- or lack thereof. “Shower?” You ask gently, intertwining your hands with his and noticing the colorful stains adorning his slender fingers. 

Jaemin nods slowly, eyes flickering up to look into yours. “Please,” he says, voice hoarser and weaker than he anticipates as he continues, “come in with me?”

“Ok,” you agree immediately and he smiles as you coax him into your bathroom gingerly, one of your hands still stubbornly loosely entangled with his. 

The shower’s steam feels good on your skin as Jaemin steps in after you and sighs happily, running his fingers through his hair, warm water droplets beginning to bead across his bare skin.

Your hand moves to hold his forearm, drawing him closer to you as you move to grab your shampoo bottle. He lets you situate him easily and lowers his head so you can lather the shampoo through his hair soothingly.

It smells of fresh citrus and smells like you and Jaemin likes it, all but purring at your comforting actions, letting his mind relax as he only focuses on the way your hands works so gently.

You then use body wash to work away the stains on his hands gently and then bring your soapy hand to cup his cheek tenderly, pressing a light kiss to the crown of his head that he smiles down are

“Me too,” Jaemin says eventually, grabbing the shampoo and making grabbing motions to you that you give into easily.

You’re even closer now as his hands work carefully and slowly. Jaemin eventually becomes distracted by his initial task, instead moving to kiss your neck somewhat messily, making you laugh breathlessly as his arms snake around your bare waist from behind. He helps you turn around in his hold carefully and then instantly connects his lips to yours, sounds drowned out by the running water. 

Jaemin’s mouth moves back to your neck as your hands splay across the firm skin of his back as he moves slowly, sucking small marks into your skin, lips hot and mixing with the hot water and making you suddenly want to feel his lips on yours.

You run your hand through his wet hair and he pulls away slowly, slightly breathless as you immediately lean in to kiss him. He moans quietly into the kiss as your tongue gently slips into his mouth and you both continue languidly for a few more moments until he eventually breaks away from you, too tired to really initiate anything more. 

Jaemin smiles at you, head tilted in obvious endearment and hand on the small of your back. “Love you,” he says easily, voice sounding more hopeful and relaxed than it had when he first came home.

You smile back, hand resting gingerly across his collarbone. “Love you too.”

After your shower, you grab the towels you laid out previously and insist on wrapping Jaemin tightly up in the white, fluffy towel. He leans into your touch, his skin now warm and soft, making you smile to yourself contently. 

You dress in pajamas quickly, watching Jaemin move around, towel eventually moving to only hanging loosely around his waist as he holds it up and rustles through his drawers for clothes with the other hand.  

You mutter something about having eaten and Jaemin stops his movements abruptly to look up at you guiltily.

You frown, knowing Jaemin’s bad habit of making sure you ate properly but never extending that concern to himself. You also know his habit of having a ridiculous amount of caffeine too. You bite your lip in response, not having the heart to chastise him right now.

You don’t say anything else and instead, leave your shared room to make tea and dig around for other food to make. Your lacking food supply reminds you that a trip to the grocery store was necessary in the near future but you make do with the ramen found in the back of your cabinet.

Jaemin eventually wanders out of your room, seeking your presence as his sock clad feet pad across the tile floors to meet you in the kitchen. He back hugs you, body warm as he slots his chin into the crook of your neck.

You stand together over the stove as you monitor the one pot with the ramen and the other with the tea. “Thank you,” he mutters into the soft material of your sweatshirt and you only hum. “Of course,” you say, “we’ll have a proper meal tomorrow,” you say, voice promising. 

Jaemin smiles, “I’ll cook,” he volunteers, cheek now pressed warmly against yours and you feel the smile, the rising of his cheeks against yours. 

Jaemin eats quickly, occasionally raising his chopsticks and holding the noodles out to you, which you accept as he watches with a small, satisfied smile.

He realizes he actually really likes the taste of the herbal lavender tea you bought, one he originally was hesitant about, attached to his typical monstrous amount of espresso. But it was proving to be relaxing and lulling, just like your presence. Jaemin also realizes that he definitely likes it partly because it reminds him of you.

You leave the dishes in the sink to do later because you had more pressing matters of being wrapped up in blankets with Jaemin, which you think is always an important and pressing matter. 

Jaemin falls onto your mattress easily, tea and shower making more tired and sleepy than he was before, eyes fluttering shut as he watches you move around the bedroom.

At some point, it had started raining but you don’t notice until you're settling into bed, the sound hitting the window pane rhythmically and quietly.

You grab an extra blanket from your closet and drape it across the two of you as Jaemin immediately closes the space between you, fingers prodding at yours until your hands are intertwined in a firm grip. 

Jaemin’s body radiates heat as you’re enveloped in the haze of permanently vanilla and bergamot scented air of your sheets from the faded scent of Jaemin’s cologne. His cheek is squished into your side, in the soft material of your pajama pants as he pulls his body further into you to get comfortable. He sighs, eyes still closed, little puffs of breath escaping the tiny parting of his lips. 

Your hands eventually break apart and your hand comes to run through his drying hair, running through the dark strands soothingly. You continue for a while, noticing Jaemin’s gradually slowing breaths against your side.

Your other hand holds your phone, checking your email and texts, not as tired as Jaemin was- but still incredibly relaxed. You realize that doing all of this for Jaemin does something for you too, extending your warmth to him only fuels the growing warmth and satisfaction inside of you. 

Your movements eventually slow to a stop, assuming he was asleep or close to it but Jaemin almost instantly muffles something between a grunt and a whine of discontent, eyes still squeezed shut. 

“I thought you were asleep,” you say quietly and he shakes his head childishly. He then opens his eyes; so wide and so round and crafted perfectly to look at you so genuinely, watching you dazed but present in the moment and then he’s smiling at you airily. 

“Your lips are soft,” you say randomly as your hand returns to run through his hair. 

“I’ve been using that lip balm that you gave me,” Jaemin smiles proudly, lips puckering momentarily to show off the smooth skin. 

You grin too as he twists to look at you, suddenly attentive with alert eyes. “Thank you,” he says eventually, eyes breaking away from your gaze only to look at you again overwhelming earnestly and intensely, “so much.”

“Of course,” you say easily, “always.”

Always. 

Always sounds incredibly nice and lovely to Jaemin. A lot of things go unspoken between the two of you. But he’s glad ‘always’ doesn’t. It’s nice to hear that kind of reassurance, to know so clearly that your lives had intertwined in a very domestic and easy way. To know you were always there to extend such genuine warmth and care to him. There are a lot of shared promises and words between the two of you, but Jaemin thinks that ‘always’ is definitely his favorite. 

[jiminjeonging]

I just find the concept of age regression on mj so interesting like how does that even happen on somebody and how do the people around you react on those behaviours, specially with someone like a romantic partner and how it also influences your job, I would love to see more takes on what u think of age regression mj for sure, such an interesting topic

im inserting some of my old ccs screenshots here which i know how i explained is kinda messy but i hope this gives you an idea on how it works<3

now for your questions age regression can happen to anyone and its a symptom of stuff like depression anxiety ptsd bpd etc rather than being a disorder of its own. its more likely to happen if you have trauma from childhood but i dont think mj has, at least i hope she doesnt, hers come from her anxiety and during stressful moments of her life, she regress back to an age where she feels the safest, theres not a specific age she regress to she just becomes more child-like. i dont think it affects her work much, shes still conscious enough to be professional and her acting out that way comes out with ppl shes more comfortable with like their staff babies her a lot too and its probably used to working with her that way. with romantic partners, it definetly helps jmj basically grow up together and are used to each others behavioural patterns so jm is understanding and she loves taking care of her, love being needed like that so its not a problem for her. i think her temper tantrums can be tiring from time to time but they're mature enough to talk those stuff through. i dont think anyone can handle a partner that age regresses. like the partner can find the whole thing exhausting and the person that regresses might limit themselves and hide a huge proportion of themselves from their partner because they dont feel comfortable enough to do it and all of that can lead to an unhealthy environment so jmj is so lucky they have each other. other than jm, i think ningselle is very understanding towards mj too, whatever if she told them about the stuff thats been going inside her head that leads her to regress or they just get used to the way she is, i think they dont ever judge her. tbh i used to think this was unspoken understanding between them but these day i start to think mj might have opened up to them.

[dearweirdme]

https://www.tumblr.com/dearweirdme/756151324163309569/have-you-seen-the-new-promotion-vid-for-are-you?source=share

..anon?

You watched the promotion video and what you saw is Jk staring Jmn lovingly? Seriously? Since the moment the video dropped EVERYONE talks about the absolute awkwardness, how Jk looks so tired he barely seems to be holding on, he is zoned out, he seems disinterested, he stands far away from Jmn and keeps an awkward distance, there is no excitement while they both read what they say from somewhere and look like they cant wait for it to end. To be fair, even if Jmn pulls him a little closer at some point, he pretty much looks equally awkward and tired. Jk looks at him a few times while he is talking and that's it.

Where, for the love of god, did you see a "stare that resembles the way Jk looks at Tae"? Why are you all so provocatively delusional and constantly lie to our faces?

Hi anon!

So... I have a theory 😂...

I don't feel that the introduction video was overly awkward. I think they both looked super tired. I do think there was some more physical distance between them than there would be when we see them be casual in other footage in a more natural setting. What I feel... is that the things they were saying was practiced, so it looks more forced. I actually think the GCF mention was very deliberate and that it was done to normalize their Tokyo trip. The 'do you remember' from Jk very much takes away from it being the epitomy of romance Jkkrs think it was. I think perhaps their physical distance is also part of that.

I can so imagine them wanting to do this show, but at the same time not wanting Jkkrs to make this into the weirdness they are known for. Jkkrs are wrong, and I can't help but wonder what it means to Jk and Jm that the Tokyio GCF was turned into something it's not. So it would not surprise me, if they have thought about how to approach this.

By no means is this something I'm sure of... it's just something I'm considering.

[dnfnoodles]

I definitely feel like I've been way to hard on sylvee because she's literally been around for everything and never responded this way but you're right. I truly think because of the cc sphere she's in they went after her (esp her past friendship with andi and then of course Hannah) we know she's close (was?) with geenelly too who is semi-part of the british crew. There's so many factors and I think it's important to remind ourselves that from what I remember she has besides the unfollowing and dm messages about it- never openly vagued or talked about them openly like others have (correct me if I'm wrong). I really hope she talks to them and they work it out but idk if they'll go back to how they used too. I think eventually her and sapnap might since they seem, from my perspective, the closest but sap is a loyal af. Like I really wonder if him and punz are done. Rip punznap sigh 🙏

Hannah is... more difficult for me, and it makes me really sad. I always used my prime on her and was almost at 2yrs lol though I've been watching her for far longer than that 😞 i really respected how she would try so hard to be careful, nuanced, and respectful in her takes but I truly think her need to be the champion of women streamers has led to blind support in not only just this case. I do think we all agree it's incredibly needed and very admirable especially with how they're still treated in the gaming/cc atmosphere and what she has gone through and experienced first hand, I'm sure there are tons of things we don't know too! However it's also important to know respect nuance in all situations.

I think to her streaming and content will always come 1st- it's her job i get it. Guess you can't blame her but I also can stop watching her for awhile. I also think she's another disillusioned cc who thought after becoming closer with dteam they'd do all this content together and dteam just doesn't work that way they just don't care or need too, you know? Moving to a new state doesn't help and can be really rough for the first year or two and that can hurt. Hannah also clearly cares alot (I'm the same way, it's part of why i liked her) and I'm sure it got frustrating esp because fans kept asking her to do stuff with them but it's the same as jm- if you're tired of it then you need to find a way to deal with it without taking it out on them.

I guess we'll see what happens. I'm really proud of sylvee for acknowledging her part so openly.

yeah I understand and agree anon :) it really is not an easy situation. For me my own comfort is the most important so I stopped watching somw people but I will try to show them understanding and empathy and I hope they can reflect on these decisions and wish them well :)

[not-goldy]

You are comparing apples to oranges.

JM showing up in a Tae live is not the same as Tae insisting on joining a show that JM and JK already planned and started to execute - with all investors, logictics, finance approvals and other arrangements planned out.

I don't know what's the issue here. If JM sent an invite to all in the group, then maybe Tae should have let him know he wants to join too. And that also rules out Tae's claims of "being hurt coz JM didn't invite". Coz JM did invite, based off that.

Jimin mentioned him and Tae hadn't met or spoken in a while. But JK was hanging out with Tae a lot, wasn't he? Then why didn't JK invite him? Tae has a habit of always throwing JM under the bus. And I can see why JM is wary of him.

All I am seeing on twitter, tiktok, YT and every other platform these past days is tkkrs and KTH solos hating on JM (and wishing him worst and d3ath) for "hurting Tae". Tired of them always throwing JM to the wolfs.

Well apples and oranges are all fruits so it's not that far off.

Okay. I'm so sorry I'm not gonna let you apply this double standard in peace. Whether it is live or a trip, a me time with a member is a me time with a member.

We don't get to tell them which form of it is more valid than the other. I'm so sorry.

The basic underlying principle here is the same and it is that they are All entitled to spend QUALITY TIME ALONE with whomever they choose whether it is alone on a live, alone in the back of a track, alone on a couch surrounded by other members or on an expensive trip somewhere.

You can not dictate for them which medium they should use, the resources they should invest in or the effort that must go into it. You are dead wrong if you believe that.

Even if Jikook had decided not to go on a trip but to spend those moments with their fans alone on live in the trunk of their car Tae would still be dead wrong if he inserted himself against their will.

You lot have lost the plot if you think the journey itself was what was special. The journey was just a means to an end- the end being Quality time with each other.

Miss me with the double standard

B. Well again, his feelings are valid. The last thing we are gonna do is invalidate people's feelings in this space. He said he wasn't invited, JM explained WHY HE WASN'T INVITED. If JM invited him, intended to invite him at all he would have said so and called Tae out for trying to start drama he ain't afraid to set record straight. Please let's not do this.

They didn't invite him. They had their reasons. Let's respect their reasons and let's respects Tae's feelings about it too. We ain't gonna rewrite the narrative arh arh. Neuw.

3. Your thoughts and feelings on this are equally valid. You are free to express them. Let's just keep it objective especially where someone who isn't your bias is involved. We gonna have a productive educative insightful discussion out of it that would help us break things down and unpack and understand their dynamics more. That is the whole point of this discussion y'all shouldn't turn this into a bloody war.

4. We dont know how Tae could possibly have not been invited. And this is something I pointed out earlier that if they have a group chat then wouldn't it have been the case that if Jikook had posted to the group that everyone including V would have seen it?

However the fact Jimin himself explained that Tae was busy with promotions so they didn't invite him also raises question mark. It's okay to admit we don't know all the fact and we may need further clarification of it from both of them.

Because it would have been easy for Jimin to say, well we didn't invite everyone individually we posted to the group and everyone responded but you.

And then Tae would have had to explain why he didn't check his messages in which case him being busy with schedule would have made so much sense.

But let's refrain from invalidating his feelings they are as valid as your opinion.

5. Tae hadn't met or spoken in a while- true, but then Jimin also explained to Jungkook that he face timed V at least once in a month so there's that.

6. I see your point about Tae not putting JK on the spot too. We already discussed this and every one shared their opinion as to why that is. If you have opinions on this that will help us understand why that is better feel free to share with the class

We all talking because we all seeking understanding of their situation. If you don't have anything helpful to add on Tag your posts as rant so I know what to do with it

[tomago]

Eros I have made my decision

Subaru + 'Kisses that are interrupted by an unsuspecting party walking in'

Hehehehehehehhehe

i'd rather be me [with you] (a. subaru)

SBR + prompt 46, kisses that are interrupted by an unsuspecting party walking in ( 476 words , gn reader )

note(s): hi . this took me so long jm so sorry i kinda botched the endinf (ofcourse makoto is in it)

the sounds of subaru’s footsteps bounced off the walls, the clock ticking louder than his breath. he staggered for a moment and recollected his balance—wiping away the sweat that dripped down to his chin; his expression washed out from practicing.

the door creaks open— “you’re still here?”

subaru plops to the floor, back against the wall. “it’s late, you know.” your arm stretches out to him, a bottle of water in your hand.

his fingers are cold to the touch, yet he smiles at you anyway. “thanks, what would i do without you~?”

you reciprocate his smile, sitting next to him on the floor. subaru looks over to you, his eyes made only for you; slowly, he links your arms and kisses the back of your palms, his lips lighter than a feather against your knuckles, “ahaha, i really mean it… what would i do without you, i mean.”

there are lines of yours that he knows by heart, there are colors of yours that have deeply stained him. simply being here with you was enough to appease his sorrows, your warmth envelops him enough to melt into you— in his world, it's only scattered with you, you, you.

“aren't you tired yet?” you return his kisses, just as tender, “i really miss you, y'know.”

“mm, don't move,” he snuggles further into your arms, his fingers drag slowly from your temple to your chin— “i still wanna kiss you ♪”

you didn't say a word, yet subaru understands completely; yes, yes, always, if it's you—at this proximity, he couldn't help but smile and count all the stars in your eyes, making him want to close the gap between you more than ever. it only seemed like a matter of seconds before he heard the door knob turn, completely changing the mood of the room.

“hey, akehoshi-kun— woah.” it was makoto who popped his head in the room in search of subaru, unknowingly becoming the antagonist in this secret romance novel.

all your thoughts for a second completely halted when you hear the other trickstar members' voice, and your body reacting swiftly. panicked, you swore you've never stood up so quickly in your life before.

“um, what are you both doing here this late?” makoto looks around the room, eyebrow raised a little.

you try to smile, “you know… practice! anyway, um, i got to go—” you paused, looking back at subaru; he was still sitting right next to where you were, his eyes pleading you to stay. god, you wish that it wasn't this difficult all the time. “sorry, but i really have to go!”

“geez, what was that?” makoto watches as you practically dash out the door, scratching his head in confusion.

subaru sighs as he jumps up, playing with an empty bottle in hand, “man, you should be grateful that you're gorgeous, ukki~”

“what's that supposed to mean..?!”

taglist ! @kazemiya ( fill in the form to be added ! )

[kanmom51]

JK's live 30 June 2023 12:38 am KST

30.6.2023 12:38 or 00:38 KST

cr./to the creators of the media used in this post.

Before I start talking about the live itself and Seven, of course, let's look for just a second, again, for the fun of it, at the numbers.

12:38 or 00:38 is the time JK started the live.

Do you see what those 2 numbers give us? Side by side?

1 2 3 and 8 and then 3 and 8. Does that help?

123

and

8/11

Do I think he did this on purpose? The 123 yeah, I see that. But the other part, nah? Just a usual lovely stars aligning Jikook coincidence I guess, lol.

Oh, and we also have 12:38 that gives us a 2+8=10 and the 1 and 3 that give us the 13, so:

13/10

So, not too too much happened during the live. JK came, talked a little tiny bit about his upcoming single, working on an album and a little more too, worked out, was his own cute self and dipped.

That was that in a nutshell.

Now let's dive in a little deeper.

JK talked about Seven. Well, telling us it's coming out on the 14 July and that he's excited about it.

There is an album in the works, but not finalized just yet.

Oh, and the MV, it's a wrap, and was fun. Now I'm truly curious.

I did talk about the song not being written by him in my previous post. He heard it with BPD and said he wants to do it a lot. His words.

He heard it, he liked it, he wanted to do it. Not personal, not a life story.

Doesn't mean the lyrics didn't 'speak' to him in a sense. Didn't mean something to him. You can feel connected to a song that isn't written by yourself. But it is something to keep in mind when we hear the song, watch the MV and see the lyrics, lol.

Just side tracking here for a sec to this:

CP says it's sooooo good. I'm gonna trust him on this.

Question I have right now is: Is JM becoming JK's spoiler king?

JK misses Jin and Hobi.

He got a new lip piercing.

What I love about that man is that he's so aware. He knows there are those that do not approve (you know, those idiots that think they have ownership over him or a right to tell him what to do). And yet, he doesn't give a shit. He wanted it, he did it. If they want to accept it they will, if they don't sucks for them. And the thing is that when he says it, he does it so nicely and respectfully. I LOVE IT!!!

He told us he's taking English lessons.

As a matter of fact, he had one just before starting the live.

Funny how both JK and JM seem to be studying English at night.

Remember this?

You know, must be one of those Jikook coincidences.

Nah. Fuck that. They are studying English together. Period.

JK talks about doing intermittent dieting, so he bought snacks but can't eat them just yet.

JK wanting to share but blanking out, lol.

Well, he didn't give us a spoiler, but we did get the next best thing, lol.

We get full JK workout.

Gotta love army edits (some at least, lol)

Poor baby hurt himself.

That was quite a workout.

Well, working out can be alone or together. There are many forms of working out... Does he really want us to wonder all of that?

The duality of this man.

And then.

I absolutely adore that JK has no problem what so ever that we see him like this. No makeup, every hair possible out of place, tired, sleepy, drunk, sad, happy, just bare.

He trusts us to see him bare.

Writing those lines, that sentence, idk why, it brings tears to my eyes.

He's not afraid to be himself. Take it or leave it. Yes, he plays the part of the idol, but he isn't afraid to show us him, a real human being just like us (just way prettier and sexier and more talented and more intelligent and in better shape), as much as he can under the circumstances of being an idol and a celebrity.

How can we not LOVE this young man?

JK ending the live.

So, not so much going on during this live.

I wrote this post based on the translations available. Of course I will watch the live translated and come back with corrections if be needed.

This to me felt more like a scheduled live for him, less one he just wanted to do, to keep connected with us or to convey a message that doesn't have to do with his own promotions (you get what I'm saying). And it makes sense it was pretty much scheduled, given the announcement of his single release. But who cares? We got us some cute ass JK. Just seeing him warms my heart. I assume it has the same effect on you.

I'll leave you with an amusing take on JK's live.

[tacticalkinky]

Relax, Baby~

Ghost x Reader (by JM)

Tags: stress relief, blowjob, massage, smut, oral, glasses, fluff to smut

A/N: In this, Ghost is slightly disabled but still working. PTSD and anxiety ail him as well. Luckily you know how to help him. (Consider donating to a starving artist @ cashapp: $judamars)

Written by: judaciousmars

The door slams and makes a loud bang noise that pounded your ears hard enough to make your eardrums tingle and startle you from slumber. You groggily sit up in bed and clumsily slip your glasses onto your face. The covers whip off of you and you hurriedly swing your legs off your bed. Whoever is making all this racket had better have a good reason for it, you think to yourself as you swiftly carry yourself out to the living room.

Instead of seeing a complete stranger or even one of your annoying roommates, like you expected to see in the moment of suspense, you instead saw Simon sitting at the kitchen table with his head in his hands. You were very confused to say the least, but the adrenaline quickly wore off as you realized you didn’t expect Simon home for another few hours. Cautious but concerned, you come up to him and sit in the chair on his left side, the strong side, since the incident…

“What’s wrong?” You ask, hovering your hand over the space in front of him so that he saw you but wasn’t triggered by your presence. Living with him for three years and dating for six taught you enough to know what makes things worse and what makes them better when he’s distressed. Simon was slightly prone to panic attacks and mental breakdowns, but luckily he had been regularly attending therapy and finding ways to help himself when youre not around. Some days were worse than others though, and this seemed to be a bad day. But you felt pretty confident it wasnt bad enough that you couldnt help.

After sitting in three minutes of awkward silence, you lay your hand palm side up on the table and slowly reach your right hand to his shoulder. Simon’s very tense in his muscles and joints, but doesn’t twitch or jerk when you reach towards him, so you rub his back. He takes your left hand with his own and leans on your shoulder. You look in a different direction than him but continue rubbing his back and letting him squeeze your hand.

Both of you sit there like this for a few minutes. You rub enough circles on his back to start a crop farm, and he silently cries but doesnt make a sound as you hold him close. Eventually, you both get tired of the silence, and begin to speak

“Sooo-“

“So-“

After realizing you both interrupted each other, you and Simon laugh. “Sorry baby, you go first.” You insist, holding his hands on the table and looking at him intently. Simon clears his throat and wipes away his tears on his sleeve. “I-I…uh…I…” Simon began to speak. He struggled to find his words but found immediate relief and comfort knowing you weren’t impatient. “I got sent home because…because…”

You cock your head to the side in confusion, because it wasn’t like him to get sent home. Simon loved his job, and had a great relationship with his supervisor, what could he have possibly done to upset Doug? Still, you patiently waited for him to collect his thoughts. “Okay.” Simon starts, taking a deep breath in and exhaling what felt like the air of a thousand winds. It seemed as though he had been holding in his stress for a while.

“It got pretty busy today. There was so much to do in so little time, I probably didn’t look happy or something because I was working the line when someone else told me to grab something from the shed. Well, I told them I’d be a second but I could get it for them as soon as I was finished with what I was doing.” Simon explained, grimacing as more tears welled up in his eyes and made his vision blurry. Simon squeezed your hand a little harder for one second to express both slight pain and general anger. “Well, honestly no one did anything wrong but they said something…I guess something like ‘Fine I’ll do it myself’ and that kinda made me mad, yknow?” Simon explains, looking at you for reassurance. You nod in understanding, of course he was right in feeling that way, you’d be mad too if someone got passive aggressive with you at work. “So anyways, I was kinda stressed already and trying to get through the day but barely holding it together, so I…may have…thrown things and walked into the break room to calm down. Well, because I threw a wrench, Doug followed in after me and talked to me.” Simon concluded, looking slightly more down like he was ashamed. You waited a minute before asking, “What did he say? Did anyone get hurt?”

“No, no, no one got hurt. I didn’t even lose my job. But Doug was pretty firm about me going home for the rest of the day to cool down. So i did, and now Im here.” Simon answered you. You breathed a sigh of relief and mentioned, “That is so good that he understood and didn’t make it a big deal. That’s a good thing, right?”

Simon nodded and brought your face closer to his and kissed your forehead. “It is. It’s kinda funny cause on the way here half of my thoughts were rushed and panicked and the other half of them kept thinking about you.” Simon tells you, grinning from ear to ear. You chuckle and nudge his shoulder with your forehead. “I love you.” You tell him.

“I love you too.”

You then light up almost instantly as you remember something that happened earlier. A special package came in the mail, and you had been waiting all day for Simon to get home to open it. You figured it would make him happy to see, so you explain yourself immediately. “Something exciting came in today. Do you wanna see?”

Simon nods and holds on to your hand as you slowly stand up and guide him to stand up as well. You figured his leg wasn’t doing well either by how it had been propped the entire time. Once he got to his feet on a steady balance, you carefully lead him to your bedroom, turning on the lights and moving things to the side on the way. Once you get to your shared room, you switch on the lights and leave him at the doorway to rummage through your dresser and find………

(Part 2 will be up later. Consider liking and supporting me, cashapp: $judamars)