#helmet transcripts

[ommatidium]

TRANSCRIPT OF FILE "2023_05_23_19_12.mp3"

[Voulez-Vous by ABBA plays]

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: [Humming] You know what I mean!

OCELLPHONE: You do know that's not how you spell helmet, right?

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: What the fuck! [Rustling] [Static]

OCELLPHONE: Hello?

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: [Static stops] Uh. Hello?

OCELLPHONE: Did you hear my question? You spelled it H-E-M-L-E-T. "Hemlet." It sounds like Hamlet's less popular nephew.

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: Um. Thanks for the correction, I guess? Who is this, how did you connect to my-

OCELLPHONE: Your password is literally 123password. That's the password they teach you not to have in like Pre-K.

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: I was banking on reverse psychology when I picked it to be frank. I'm not Frank, I'm Spider-man! [Laughter]

OCELLPHONE: Ha ha, that's very funny! Spider-man has a hyphen in it, man. I doubt he would actually misspell his name.

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: What? No it doesn't?

OCELLPHONE: That's how literally every single paper spells it!

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: Yeah! And they also say I'm a puppy hating terrorist! They're wrong about a bunch of things!

OCELLPHONE: Yeah, yeah whatever you sa-

OCELLPHONE: [Silence]

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: [Wind blowing] [Rustling] You good? Cut out there.

OCELLPHONE: Fine. Tell y'what "Spider-Man."

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: Can hear the air quotes from Brooklyn, but carry on.

OCELLPHONE: If you're really who you say you are-

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: I don't have to prove that to you!

OCELLPHONE: -And not some sad guy just pretending to be out of boredom or loneliness or whatever-

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: Ow, okay, that would hurt if it were true.

OCELLPHONE: -Raise your left hand.

[Silence]

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: What? Are you watching me right now? I don't- I can't feel-

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: I did it, for the record!

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: You're an odd one, you know that?

[Silence]

OCELLPHONE: Holy fucking shit.

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: Yep!Surprise, I guess. Where are you?

OCELLPHONE: [Coughing] Uh. Um. Around. Don't worry about it.

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: I'm worried about it!

[A loud crash can be heard from both inputs]

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: Fuck! [Rustling] [Thwip] [Wind blowing]

OCELLPHONE: What the hell was that?

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: [Over the wind] No clue, I'm going to check it out though. Uh. I'm gonna be out of range soon I think?

OCELLPHONE: Alright, be safe out there.

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: Never am! But yeah, I won't be able to [Static] you. [Wind blowing] [More static]

OCELLPHONE: That's alright, you have- y'know- a whole thing to deal with.

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: That's one way to put it. [Static] -the fuck is that thing?! Listen, I enjoyed chatting, stranger. Even if [Static] -insulting me half the time.

OCELLPHONE: Part of my charm. It's Ocelli. By the way. Not a stranger anymore.

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: Nice [Static] Ocelli! Stay out of [Static] -of Brooklyn. Hope you weren't planning [Static] Coney Island [Static].

OCELLPHONE: Stay out of Brooklyn, got it, already do that.

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: [Static]

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: [Static]

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: [Static]

SPIDERMAN_HEMLET_DO_NOT_USE: [Static]

OCELLPHONE: Okay Google, show me fastest route to Brooklyn by bike.

[genspiel]

auughhh so if you translate thelxie's morse code and caesar cipher it, he legitimately speaks french

[100yearoldcomics]

July 27, 1922 Krazy Kat by George Herriman

[ID: Krazy bends over to look at a steel Brodie helmet on the ground. /end] Krazy: Ah-hah, a soldier's helmet.

[ID: Officer Pupp walks behind Krazy as he fastens the helmet onto his head. /end] Pupp: Oh hoh. He's got his head protected today, safe & sound from the "bricks" of that vile mouse.

[ID: Krazy begins marching in place as Pupp walks off. /end] Pupp: All's well.

[ID: Krazy stands at attention at the base of a brick wall. Ignatz peers over the top at him. /end] Krazy: Well, he's got an iron derby on today, heh?

[ID: Ignatz steals Krazy's helmet with a horseshoe magnet on the end of a fishing pole. He quickly ZIPs a brick onto Krazy's exposed bean, hitting it with a WAM. /end] Krazy: L'il ainjil.

[ID: Ignatz calmly strolls past Officer Pupp, shouldering his magnet pole. /end] Ignatz: Good hunting. Pupp: Wodda y'mean, "good hunting"?

[todays-xkcd]

We're considering installing a pressurization system to keep the tanks at constant pressure solely to deter them.

Storage Tanks [Explained]

Transcript

[Two characters wearing helmets are standing on scaffolding next to two large tanks labeled "Tank #3" and "Tank #4", with the person on the left talking. Miss Lenhart has drilled a hole into the base of Tank #4 with liquid pouring out of it and she is running away with the drill.] Left person with helmet: As head of security, your primary task is to monitor the storage tanks and watch for calculus teachers trying to drill holes in their bases.

[sankt-jesper]

For @fordoweek day 2: armors and stories

(ID + textless variant under the cut)

[ID 1: Fanart of Captain Fordo from the Star Wars franchise. He's in full armor, without his helmet. It's Phase I with a kama and an officer pauldron. There are info boxes pointing at specific armor parts. Transcription: 1: Unsanctioned paint color (formerly for captains. now only for him, apparently.); 2: Coruscant Guard officer pauldron (he "borrowed" Thire's); 3: 17's custom holsters that Fordo "found" on 17's bunk the ground; 4: Cody's (first and only) kama. Custom made: insulated, blast resistant, with beaded weights sewn in the bottom hem... and he "lost" it before his first mission! 5: Mysterious traces of orange paint. End transcription. Infobox 5 points to a zoom in on the kama's hem, where orange paint can be seen under red paint. /END ID]

[ID 2: Fanart of Captain Fordo from the Star Wars franchise. He's in full armor, without his helmet. It's Phase I with a kama and an officer pauldron. It is the same picture as the one above but without info boxes. /END ID]

[sargeantposting]

Logan: And I couldn't thank my mechanic enough. And also my parents, uh, they really helped me to be able to win the world championship and it’s just an amazing feeling.  Interviewer: I mean, did you, did you, what did you do when you found out you won? Did you call your friends at home? Did you phone your grandpa? What did you get up to?  Logan: Uh, no, I just gave my mom and dad a really big hug. Interviewer: Is it still sinking in now?  Logan: Yeah, it's, it's a really emotional thing. [full transcript continues below cut]

Interviewer: I can imagine. I can imagine. You said that your mechanic Scott and also your driver Coach Gary really helped you along the way. How did, how did they do that?  Logan: Um, well, my driver coach Gary, he helped me a lot. Of course, he manages everything and he always keeps me calm before the races and just makes sure I'm always at my best. And Scott, of course, he always just makes sure the cart is perfect, make sure all the tire pressures are good and yeah, that's about it.  Interviewer: What's the difference before you get into the race? You said he keeps you calm and then when you put your helmet and you're actually sitting in the car. How do you feel? What's the difference?  Logan: Well, until the engines start, it's a bit, it was, it was a bit nerve wracking. But once the engines start, you forget about everything and you're ready.  Interviewer: And do you, do you just believe that you can beat all of your fellow races because sometimes some of those races there's like 90 odd other kids aren't there? Logan: Yeah, that weekend I was feeling really confident because I had been quick the whole week and I had won the pre-final. So I, yes, I did believe I could win.  Interviewer: Tell me about when you were a little bit younger than you are now. You're only 14 now. But why racing, why, why is this so important to you?  Logan: Um, well, my dad bought me a, a racing kart when I was five years old and we started from there. We thought it would just be like a little hobby and, uh, it ended up becoming like a professional thing we did. So. Interviewer: So, so was there a moment when you, when you or your dad just thought ‘Wow, I'm quick. I can do this’?  Logan: Um, well, not really. We just kept progressing and then, um, when we, when we decided to come to Europe to race, um, we moved to Switzerland and from then on we were just, uh, going to school, I started going to school in Switzerland. And, yeah, and then we just kept going and then ended up like this.  Interviewer: Do you have any other hobbies? Can you fit anything else in?  Logan: Um, well, other than school it's really hard. But when I get my breaks and I go back to Florida for, um, I like to go fishing a lot and, yeah, that's what I do. Mostly.  Interviewer: Nice, nice and relaxing. Schumacher, Vettel and Senna are just some of your idols, aren't they? What is it about them that you love?  Logan: Uh, just like the legacy that they've built and how, how good they were.  Interviewer: So, is that what you want to achieve?  Logan: Yeah, definitely.  Interviewer: Where do you want to go from here?  Logan: Um, well, next year I'll be racing in KF and then after that I'll try and make my way to Formula One.  Interviewer: And do you think if you achieved getting to Formula One, do you think you could match maybe Lewis Hamilton or Sebastian Vettel's four titles or even Michael's?  Logan: Well, we're far away away from that. But, um, hopefully, yeah, we'll see.  Interviewer: You must think about it though. Teenagers always think about stuff like this, don't they?  Logan: Yeah, of course. But it's a long way away. So I, I'm just focused on next year.  Interviewer: Well, we wish you lots of luck for next year and well done. Logan: Thank you very much.

[canon-gabriel-quotes]

Transcript:

A vile trickster sent me a nefarious package that unleashed a torrent of glitter upon myself and my home!

I have spent the last 3 hours meticulously using masking tape to extract the microplastics from my helmet.

Audio Source

gif for anyone who wants it

secret bonus audio of him opening the glitter bomb

[what-is-love-babey-dont-hurt-me]

Some headcanons I have about King Dedede, Captain Vul, and their species!

Many, many millions of years before the tragedy that befell the dinosaurs, alien researchers tried to study them, and did not plan for their escape from the research facility, and eventual takeover of the planet! Through many years of adaptation to the new planet, you see the feathers and bird-like feathers we know and love in King Dedede and others!

This is related to my OC Sir Meteor, who you can vote for here ! 💫🦖☄️

Transcript + More below the cut below

Vestigial tail + spikes

A far cry from the reptile tails of old, the tails of current day are stubby with little movement, and in a few generations will likely be completely gone.

These guys are descendants of dinosaurs! The tails had been used for mobility, balance, but especially fighting. This connotation created ripples in the culture of what the vestigial tail means for avians, no matter how stubby and useless it is in present day! Since hollow bones had started to emerge in the species, anything that could possibly crush them is considered taboo, including showing off tails freely. A lot of them pretend they don’t exist!

Prehensile feathers

The feathers at the tip of the wings are modified fingers that can grab! If you were to push back the feathers, you would even see vestigial talons that are either too small to be any threat, or kept trip for proper appearance. All of the avians have thumb-like digits as well, but their grip is not a precise as our own.

Avians of high social standing often commission and wear enchanted gloves to aid with their weak grip, and it is why Dedede isn’t seen with his feathers and can use his hammer!

Spines + tail usually covered up

For this study, I focused on just the bodies themselves, but i wanna delve deeper into the culture they have! In particular clothing is important. They usually keep their tail and spines covered up for modesty and cultural norms—the spines are seen as weapons and only shown when living a life of battle! Even Dedede who gets into fights often doesn’t want to show them, but there is exceptions. The gray star warrior having their tail out is due to the position they have in the army. They dedicate their life to a battle. Other factors include needing high mobility! Some avians in gymnastics or on rescue teams, and other professions where mobility is essential are exempt from this rule, but they often have a robe or cover-up when not performing the task.

For Dedede: adapted to be a water-type bird, has flippers and webbed feet, and is unable to fly. His eyes are bigger than normal for the purpose of being able to see in dark waters with barely any light, although the trade off is his long distance vision leaves much to be lacking. His choice of hammer as a weapon is barely any thought to us, but a taboo one in avian society. His distance from any others of his kind is in part due to his refusal to put it down.

For Vul: he is a an avian capable of flight!! This is a rarer trait. He feels at home in the sky, and his eyes even in his old age are unparalleled to anyone else in his crew. Vul, like dedede, normally covers his tail, especially because even though he lives a life of battle, he is rather old fashioned and does not want to admit it, despite being captain to a crew of knights.

For the Star Warrior: a unnamed individual who would turn heads if they walked on their home planet looking like that. Metal armor in of itself is unusual because most avians hate to weight themselves down too much to fly, even if they aren’t a flying type. Under the helmet they have a bright red crest, and for the long legs I based them off of a Sandhill Crane. Their long legs are the best example of another trait I didn’t get to touch on yet: these guys have feathers covering the legs! Where in real life birds usually have scales, these guys have a gene which gives them feathers everywhere but the feet. Similar to silkie chickens or pigeons with muffs!

Most of these guys have some kind of feathered crest above their eyes! It helps keep sun and water out of their face, similar to eyebrows.

Page 2: a doodle comic with the story of how avians were created, along with a visual of them being somewhere between a dinosaur and bird

I have more but MAN this is getting too long

[buff-daddy-cole]

HOLY SHIT LLOYD'S BLOG FROM DARKLEYS

TRANSCRIPT:

Part 1

Today was almost the best day of my life. I was eating my breakfast when a package came from my grandmummy and it was filled with bright, sticky candy! At my boarding school for bad boys it's REALLY, REALLY hard to get any candy or fun toys because they're always busy teaching us how to pull tricks and take over the world and stuff. I was about to smush my face full of candy when that bully Finn saw me and his face had a big smirk on it. He got up from his seat at the next table over and grabbed the candy away, using his powers to turn it into crawly bugs and worms. 'Disgusting!' I yelled, 'HEYYY, MY CANDY!' He laughed, looking around at his friends, and then he pointed to his t-shirt that read 'Evil Geniuses Don't Cry.' Everyone was laughing. I had to get out of there before he decided to stick me in the trash bin again.

I hid in an empty classroom and thought of a plan. What was the word for that called? I have to try and remember all the words from my Villain Vocabulary List. Plotted, that's right. So I sat right there and plotted. I was going to leave Darkley's Boarding School for Bad Boys and never come back, AND I was going to get more candy. Everyone knows the first rule of any mission is to dress really scary, so I picked the lock on the teacher's closet and found an extra cape and a black helmet to wear. There were also some stuff the teachers took away from us, like a rubber band, rubber snakes, and a soccer ball. Rubber Snakes! That was it! They looked just like Serpentine. HISSS!

Part 2

The best candy store is in Jamanakai Village, so of course I snagged a wheelbarrow and loaded it up. I got lollipops, gooey taffy, sugar straws, EVERYTHING! I threw the snakes at the villagers watching me. People hid and were scared. This is great, I thought, I’m going to have all the candy in Jamanakai and get a SUGARRRR HIGH! What would Finn think now, huh? Then those stupid Ninja had to show up, saying the snakes were fakes. They yelled at me for stealing. Before I knew it, people were throwing rotten vegetables at me, and those Ninja tied me up to a sign. This was just like Finn all over again. I felt a single tear fall on my cheek, but then I thought that Finn might be right about one thing – evil geniuses don’t cry! I am Lloyd Garmadon, son of Lord Garmadon and future ruler of the world!

I wandered through the Glacier Barrens to hide/plot. I was going to let those Ninjas see who they were dealing with. My luck turned around when I found this hatch that said Hypnobrai Serpentine on it with pictures of a snake using mind control. I was shocked…this looked like the real thing. I thought it was only a myth! I opened the door, and BOOM, fell down the hole. It looked like a snowy trap, and I could see millions of myself reflected in the ice. Just as I was thinking that I looked pretty scary, I saw a stranger – except he was just a frozen warrior dude, all bones. I started to shake. I wondered what happened down here... I’d rather be tied up by the Ninjas than end up frozen like him. All of a sudden I heard a rattling, and a bunch of TALKING SNAKES came out of nowhere! The leader tried to do a swirly thing with his eyes to control my mind, but I used my genius skills to move out of the way and deflect his stare, which bounced back at him. He was under mind control! I could make him and his army do anything I wanted! MUHAHAHA!

[teamnick]

Charles talking about his friendship with Pierre in the Jay Shetty Podcast - transcript under the cut

Jay Shetty: Everyone is quite competitive, like I can't imagine drivers being friends and hanging out afterwards, because…I dont know, I mean you tell me…

Charles Leclerc: Actually I’ve got a really good friend on he grid, Pierre Gasly. We grew up together, we started in karting with our first race together in 2005…

JS: Wow…

CL: …so yeah like 7-8 years old…we did the French Championship together and we became super good friends, our families are super close as well, so we used to go on holidays together…and then we find ourselves in Formula 1 now, so…but trust me, as soon as I close the visor, and I’m with a helmet, he is nobody anymore, and that’s the same for him and we know that! But whenever we are outside the car, we have a really really strong friendship. So you can have friends, but it’s very difficult to create friendships if you didnt know that person before getting into Formula 1, because it’s such a competitive world, everybody wants to have the upper hand, everybody wants to do everything in his own benefit…because at the end we want to win, we want to be the best on track, so…there’s a lot of respect, but we are not giving anything away to the others. And as much as I am friend with Pierre, I’m not giving him any advices or whatsoever. I just want to beat him as much as I want to beat everybody else on track. But lonely sport? I dont think it is.

[ommatidium]

TRANSCRIPT OF FILE "HELMET_AUDIO_06_08_23.mp3"

SPIDER_MAN: [Humming, "The Winner Takes It All" by ABBA]

[Silence] [Indistinct traffic]

SPIDER_MAN: [Sighs]

[Silence] [Indistinct traffic]

[Static]

SPIDER_MAN: Oh! Oh fuck yeah, c'mon, c'mon connect- [Helmet being smacked]

OCELLI: Y'ello? Can you hear me? Spidey?

SPIDER_MAN: Yes! Yes, yes I can hear you! Dude where have you been? I missed you!

OCELLI: Aw, you missed me? [Pause] You missed me?

SPIDER_MAN: Of course I did, I don't get much friendly interaction out here.

OCELLI: Oh. Yeah, that makes sense. I was just out, I do have a life y'know? One that doesn't revolve entirely around you.

SPIDER_MAN: Really? Is that why you have my patrol routes memorized?

OCELLI: I will hang up.

SPIDER_MAN: [Laughing] Wait, no no!

OCELLI: [Laughing] Playing, playing. [Sigh] I had a concussion if you must know. Didn't do your best work with Sir Polkadot last week.

SPIDER_MAN: Fuck, were you there? 'Celli I am so sorry, I completely fucking fumbled with that one. I don't understand what even happened I was so off my game, and people got hurt, you got hurt apparently and- [Grunts] -that weirdo is still out there putting holes in New York or whatever and-

OCELLI: Woah, woah, take a breath Spidey. [Exaggerated breathing]

SPIDER_MAN: [Mimicked exaggerated breathing] [Pause] [Continued breathing] I'm sorry, man.

OCELLI: Hey, you're fine. Happens to New York's best!

SPIDER_MAN: No, I mean yeah about the mini freak-out, but also about the concussion.

OCELLI: Well, self-flagellation isn't going to fix that shit. I'm almost back in working order anyhow, but that's the reason I've been gone.

[Silence]

OCELLI: You know, I didn't mean it when I said that wasn't your best work, right? He was literally ripping portals through the air, no one can blame you for having a bit of trouble.

SPIDER_MAN: Yeah. I guess.

[Silence]

OCELLI: See, I know you're bent out of shape about this because you haven't even commented on the name I gave the guy. C'mon "Sir Polkadot" that's right up your alley in terms of names.

SPIDER_MAN: [Laughing] We're not calling him that.

OCELLI: There is no "we" in this, I'm fucking call him that! I'll get Jameson to call him that, watch!

SPIDER_MAN: You know Jameson? The guy who literally slanders me for fun?

OCELLI: Libel. But yeah, I kinda work for him.

SPIDER_MAN: [Mocking] "Libel."

SPIDER_MAN: [Scoff] You remind me of someone.

OCELLI: Oh, really? Who?

[Silence]

[Silence]

[Silence]

SPIDER_MAN: [Sniffs] Uh-

OCELLI: Sorry, that'd reveal too much of your identity, right?

SPIDER_MAN: Um. Yeah. Right.

[fitzs-space]

Legally, it is a mullet,,, if you would call it that,,, this is part one! Part Two

Old comic reposts! this was form back on February 10th 2022. some designs are outdated, This is also the comic that caused my brother to ask why I was "drawing twink Doomguy" Transcript below!

Zedaph: you ever wonder what X looks like under his helmet and all that? Z: think their just like EvilX? Tango: I don’t know man, T: for as long as I’ve known the guy I’ve never seen them take the thing off. Keralis: oh! Are we talking of Shashwamy’s sweet face? K: it really is a beautiful face he has, did you know that X has a mullet? They said it fit better with the helmet! And the little old ‘X’ scar he has,,,(rest is just unimportant blabbering) *”X has a mullet”* T: ah,, Z: oh,,,

[gunthermunch]

[Transcript under the cut]

Bluma: uncle Wolfgang? WG: not the moment Bluma: i'm just trying to know where do we know her from! WG: she's a friend. WG: was. i think. WG: listen- she's a big nerd. that's all you need to know Bluma: cool Cass: Bluma, could you please come over here? WG: you better go Cass: done! Bluma: woa…! Bluma: it looks exactly the same! Cass: your kitty radio works as a spirit box now. it's like… a phone for ghosts. Bluma: wait does this means it won't play music anymore? Cass: well… WG: we're gonna find out down there. Bluma: all set up… WG: no you're not WG: you don't know how to secure these. what a mess Bluma: this is degrading Cass: don't worry, i'm the only one watching Bluma: yes that's the problem.

Bluma: me! i'll get this open! WG: careful, those are heavy- Bluma gasps WG: there's your door, Cassandra. Cass: thank you.

Bluma: hm… damp. WG: are you sure you wanna be at the front?? why did i let her at the front. Bluma: it's fine, i have my helmet on. WG: …so, may i know who's the lucky guy? Cass: … WG: cold. understandable. hey i have some slots for flower girl available next year, i do quite the clean job. Cass: alright first of all we are ghost hunting. Second, you didn't even ask about our friends and you already want to know about my fiance? Why is Joni Mitchell playing?! WG: fine! fine. WG: i just- Bluma: can you guys keep it down? i can her everything and it's icky. Groaning Bluma: OVER THERE!-- WG: WAIT- BLUMA--!!! Cass: hey?! Cass: dang it.

[todays-xkcd]

Subway refuses to answer my questions about whether it's an International Footlong or a US Survey Footlong. A milligram of sandwich is at stake!

US Survey Foot [Explained]

Transcript

[Closeup on Cueball.] Cueball: We thought it was over. After 60 years of struggle, the US survey foot was dead, deprecated by NIST in 2023.

[Cueball is shown to be talking to Ponytail, Hairy, and Megan. He has a presentation behind him.] Cueball: We thought architects and engineers could rest east, free of the headaches of having two conflicting definitions of the foot that differ by 610 nanometers. International foot: 0.304 800 000 m US survey foot [crossed over in gray] R.I.P.: 0.304 800 609... m

[Cueball points at an image of Black Hat] Cueball: But I bring dire news: Cueball: Someone has started using the US survey foot again.

[Closeup on Cueball again.] Off-panel voice: Why!? Cueball: We don't know. Cueball: Some people just want to drag the world 610nm closer to madness.

[Farther view of Cueball only. He clenches a fist.] Off-panel voice: What can we do!? Cueball: A NIST team is already in the air. We will capture the scofflaw and end this nightmare.

[Two helicopters flying, with mountains in the background.]

Caption: 8,000 miles away [Two operatives in a forest with "NIST" helmets. One talks on a walkie-talkie.] Operative: We've reached the coordinates of the target's device. There's no one here. Voice from walkie-talkie: How!?

Caption: 8,000.016 miles away [Black Hat walking elsewhere in the forest, very close by.] Black Hat: ♫ ♪

[thisisnotawebsitedotcom-com]

Computer Code: TANTRUM

A transcript between Bill Cipher and Time Baby will be shown.

The text says:

TRANSCRIPT

HEAR THIS, CIPHER! THIS MOMENT IS A NEXUS EVENT, AN INFRACTION POINT BETWEEN ALL TIMELINES. YOU MUST CHOOSE TO TURN BACK NOW. IN EVERY REALITY, YOUR COLLISION WITH EARTH CAUSES CHAOS AND DESTRUCTION ON AN UNFATHOMABLE SCALE!

OH NO! NOT CHAOS! I HATE THAT! LOOK NICK JR, I HAVE IT ON GOOD AUTHORITY THAT THIS PLANET IS GOING TO SELF-DESTRUCT EVENTUALLY, SO IT MIGHT AS WELL DO IT WITH ME AS BOSS, RIGHT? HOWSABOUT WE DIVVY THIS REALITY UP? I’LL TAKE EARTH, YOU CAN TAKE ALL THE GAS GIANTS, AND I THROW IN THIS BLANKY.

A SEDUCTIVE GAMBIT. BUT FOR THE SAKE OF TIME, I MUST RELENT.

WHAT DO YOU WANT? SODA? I CAN GET YOU SODA. EVEN IF YOUR MOM SAYS YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DRINK IT, I CAN GET IT.

I WAS NOT BORN YESTERDAY

OH HERE WE GO

I WAS FORGED IN THE CRUCIBLE OF REALITY ITSELF, THE LAST SURVIVOR OF THE WAR OF THE TIME GIANTS. MY CELESTIAL CREATORS, GRANDFATHER AND GRANDMOTHER CLOCK, GIFTED ME WITH THE BURDEN OF PROTECTING THE TIMELINE FROM THOSE WHO WOULD DARE UNWEAVE IT.

AWW LOOK AT THAT! YOU SPOKE WITHOUT SPITTING UP ON YOURSELF! LOOK SIPPY CUP, IF YOU’RE SAYING REALITY ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR THE TWO OF US, I AGREE! YOU MIGHT WANNA PUT ON A SAFETY HELMET BECAUSE IM ABOUT TO FIND OUT HOW SOFT BABY SKULLS REALLY ARE.

A FOOLISH STATEMENT. I CANNOT BE KILLED.

WANNA BET?

Ciphers henchmen circled. The Time Agents grabbed their Time Tapes. Time Baby sighed, the weight of the multiverse on his doughy shoulders.

I KNOW YOUR CRIMES, CIPHER. TAKING A NEW HOME WILL NOT MAKE UP FOR THE ONE YOU’VE LOST. WHAT YOU DID TO THE COUNTLESS SOULS OF EUCLYDIA-

Cipher stopped in his tracks.

YOU CHOOSE YOUR WORDS VERY. CAREFULLY.

Ciphers henchmen murmured amongst each other, confused. They seemed to have heard conflicting stories about Bill’s past.

“You said you liberated the people of your dimension-”

LIBERATED THEM FROM THEIR BODIES!

DONT LISTEN TO HIM! HE’S A BABY! HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO SAY SPAGHETTI!

I DO TOO

SAY IT

...

PASGHETTI

(TO THE TIME AGENTS) YOU’RE REALLY GONNA FOLLOW THIS GUY?

(SHAKING HIS HEAD IN DISTAIN) WHAT WOULD YOUR PARENTS SAY IF THEY COULD SEE WHAT YOU’VE BECOME. WHAT WOULD SCAL-

ENOUGH TALK! READY TO BE KNOCKED INTO THE LITERAL ICE AGE?

I DO NOT WISH TO FIGHT YOU CIPHER.

Time Baby slowly began to remove his gauntlets.

BUT A BABY’S GOTTA DO... WHAT A BABY’S GOTTA DO

Cipher and TB lunged at each other. It was hard to see the exact nature of the time fight but there were a lot of clocks, portals, and paradoxes involved. At one point someone used nunchucks made out of two Abe Lincolns, and there was a moment where they both clipped through reality jostled the card carrier in Dennis’s backpack. But ultimately Cipher’s henchmaniacs dealt TB a devastating blow. We Time Agents were leaderless, forced to regroup back in 20712.

But we knew this wasn’t over.

No...

It was only a matter of time

END TRANSMISSION

[malwarechips]

god tamer yay

[text transcript of sorts under the cut because i have no idea how to fit all of the text into the id. i hope thats alright!]

next to the halfbody: "armour intentionally designed to obscure species she's a cockroach though

one antennae crooked. doesn't have to be consistant which one

both top and bottom halfves of helmet can pivot to open. she almost never opens it, though. usually just takes it off if she wants to show her face"

next to the headshots: "crack from an unfortunately well angled hit during a fight"

next to the arm sketch: "spines (3 on each of her limbs)"

next to the wings, with each note pointing to each part: "armour actual elytra wings yay"

next to the doodle of lob in the free space: "free space for lob yayyyy !!! dogy"