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sincerelybubbles · 7 months ago

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It's a Date part 2

warnings: fluff, descriptions of being touch starved (? idk) not really edited oopsies

synopsis: things go well after f!reader and spencer's date, spencer helps reader see that she's wanted and deserving of affection

part 1

⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚

“Sorry, it’s messy,” you say, wringing your hands as you walk through the door. You hear Spencer laugh out through his nose, a quick burst of air that has you spinning around to watch him latch the door.

He’s shaking his head, hair falling in front of his eyes, nose bridge crinkled.

“What?”

“You’re acting like I’ve never been here before.” He twists the deadbolt and walks over to you, shaking his head one more time before slipping off his shoes and heading into the kitchen.

“I don’t know, I guess it feels different, somehow, now that …” Neither of you has tried to put a label on this. It’s been weeks, coffee dates squished between hectic work schedules, yawning absences while he chases cases with the team, and one movie night at his place that had you listening to him rant about the inaccuracies of a historical drama you picked out. It’s been lovely, you adore his tendencies to go off on tangents, enjoying simply watching him light up and trip over his own words to get everything out. It feels like he’s racing to say whatever he can before you interrupt him. You never have, something he commented on during your second date.

“You know you can just tell me to shut up when I go off about stupid stuff like that. Everyone does, I’m used to it, I don’t want to bore you.” “Why would I? It’s not boring or stupid — it’s stuff you care about and I like hearing what you care about.”

“Now that, what?” Spencer asks, settling his back against your counter and resting his hands on the edge behind him.

He’s still in his work clothes, tie loose, gun at his hip, hair behind his ears.

One thing you didn’t expect from him? Confidence. You knew he had to be confident in some ways — he’s never doubted his intellectual ability that you could tell — but it only took a short time for him to gain his comfort around you. No longer did he blush and bumble his way through sentences, struggling to meet your eye. Your first kiss actually seemed to clear that up quickly.

It happened feet away from where you’re standing, outside of your door, after dinner. He reached forward to brush an eyelash on your cheek as you said goodbye, you leaned into his hand and, after a moment and with a burst of adrenaline that fueled your forwardness, you leaned up and toward him, a hand on his arm, and brought your lips to his. He was hesitant, fingertips brushing your cheekbone, but he came to life as you pulled away to ask him if this was alright, palm meeting your cheek fully and bringing you in for a proper kiss. Excitement was evident by the way he pressed closer to you, stepping nearer and putting another hand on your waist, locking you in place. Under the excitement was a tenderness you’ve never felt before. He kissed like he wanted to take all the air from your lungs but he held you with the sort of care that made your lungs ache for a reason entirely seperate from the kissing.

“I don’t know,” you say, chickening out from asking for the hundredth time, going to meet him in the kitchen.

“Hey,” Spencer says, catching you by the waist and pulling you to come stand near him with one hand on your hip. “Ask,” he says, tucking his chin to grin down at you, nudging your foot with his.

“Why don’t you?”

“I’m afraid to scare you off,” he says with a smile. Behind his eyes, though, you can see the truth in it.

He called you the morning after your date. Young sunlight caught in your eyes and caused you to squint as you searched for your forgotten phone, spots dancing and dust creating a kaleidoscope as you pressed answer. “Hello?” you asked, confused. It was Spencer, wishing you a good morning. He went quiet when you asked why he called, if everything was okay. “Everything is fine, sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you.” “It’s okay, I need to be up soon anyway. Why’d you call, though?” “I just couldn’t get the thought out of my head last night that I must have done something to mess it all up. I wanted to call and make sure I hadn’t.” “You could never, Spencer.”

You know the uncertainty still rears its head, even with the confidence that’s fostered with time.

“It feels incredibly juvenile,” you say, rolling your eyes and smoothing your hands up his chest to rest on his shoulders.

“Ask,” he whispers, “I’ll say yes. All you have to do is ask.”

The week after your first date, Spencer showed up at your office, panting, a bag in his hand. You stood up, shocked to see him at the station, and hurried out to meet him in the lobby. “You said you wanted lunch from the Chinese place down the road because you forgot to pack something,” Spencer said by way of explanation. You had mentioned it, briefly, in a text. “I was just complaining, you didn’t have to spend your lunch break on this,” you said, eyes welling up with tears. You reached forward, ignoring the bags, and pulled him into a hug. “You’re entirely too sweet to me. This was too much.” “Nothing is too much, all you have to do is ask.”

“When I call back my friend later,” you start, determined to ask while looking in his eyes, drowning as you do it, face heating, “can I tell her my boyfriend came to spend some time with me?”

It’s sort of a cop-out, of course, and Spencer catches it — you’re not directly asking, but he nods anyway, then laughs, leaning forward to kiss you.

The kiss is messy, he’s laughing and you’re smiling, but you appreciate it all the same.

“Why are you laughing?” You ask, leaning back and catching another kiss on your nose and then your cheek.

“There’s a few reasons. I never thought I would have this, for one, and I guess I’m just happy.”

“You guess?”

“I know.”

You wind up in bed. Nothing nefarious, not yet — both of you understand that space to breathe and grow together is much more important and that awkwardness needs to settle into comfortable familiarity before crossing that specific line.

Spencer drags his finger across your cheek, tracing your bone structure. His other hand is tucked under your side, holding your hip and keeping you close.

The feeling in your chest is heavy, pressing up into your throat and capturing any words you could dare to think.

“Are you okay?” Spencer asks, voice a whisper, breath fanning across your face and causing little hairs to prick up across your arms.

You nod, looking him in the eye and signaling the truth. His nearness wasn’t causing you distress but the unfamiliarity of it is hard to not become consumed by.

You squeeze your eyes closed, nose scrunching and fight tears.

“Are you sure?” Spencer asks, voice hesitant, fingers leaving your face and arms pushing to give you space. Space you don’t want. Space that makes your eyes snap open, searching for him, afraid he might waltz off any moment.

“Yes,” you say, voice certain and hand snapping out to grab him before he can go too far.

Tears well up in your eyes, against your internal fighting. You huff out an embarrassed laugh, leaning forward to press your forehead into his shoulder. His arms tighten around you, hesitant around your waist and cradling the back of your head.

“Tell me what’s wrong, please,” he asks, voice soft, begging, an undertone of a demand that you adore. The sense that he would do anything to ensure that you feel better washes over you. It makes the sweetly-sick feeling well up into you further, drowning your senses.

“Nothing is wrong,” you say, cuddling into him, slipping a foot inbetween his and tangling yourself tighter, “it’s just been a while since I’ve felt … wanted. And I do, now, with you — feel wanted. At least, I hope I am.”

“You are,” Spencer interrupts, reassuring.

“It’s nice but I don’t really know what to do with it.”

“It?”

“The feeling, I guess.” You shrug. “I suppose touch starved is the right word, but it feels like more than that.”

His grip tightens as your tears come with a faster frequency, to your own annoyance.

“I’m sorry, this is a really nice moment, I’m beyond happy, I don’t mean to ruin it.” You attempt to pull away to wipe your face but Spencer doesn’t let you.

“Did you know that some studies show that a lack of connection socially is more detrimental than obesity or smoking? We literally need to feel connected to other people. And that’s just social connection — when left alone without any type of physical connection, specifically physical connection from someone you care about, depression, stress, and physical health can deteriorate. It’s natural to feel overwhelmed when you’re finally getting what you need — what everyone needs.”

“Touch starved,” you whisper, allowing him to hold you tight, relaxing further into his hold.

“Sorry?”

“Touch starved — I’ve heard people call it touch starved.”

Spencers hand moves to stroke your hair, picking up strands and twisting them before smoothing it down again.

“That feels like an apt term for it.”You fall asleep like that, warm and pressed into his side, listening to him softly tell you about his week, feeling secure and wanted in a way you never have before.

taglist: @0108s22m @bowerfeithwk @screechingphantommaker @cultish-corner @doigettokeepyou @izukuwus

note: i really intended on this being more so please forgive me -- let me know what you think! i welcome constructive criticism as well as any and all thoughts you have!!

now that i've finished this, i might attempt another part to give u guys more but i also am taking requests/thinkin' of new things to write!! more spencer to come, as well as possibly some hotch, so keep an eye out

ily all and tysm for the support <3

#bubbs.writes #x reader #cm #criminal minds #fluff #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #cm x reader #criminal minds x reader #it's a date part 2 #taglist is open!#i am so beyond sorry that it took this long #more soon #i promse promise promise

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mydear-corinthian · 8 months ago

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Dirty Diana || Thomas Shelby x reader

Synopsis: After the war, you and Tommy were separated leaving you in London alone with no money at all. Pairing: Thomas Shelby x reader , Tommy Shelby x reader Warnings: SMUT +18, mentions of prostitution & misogynist, p in v, unprotected sex, dirty talk Notes: I saw this Dirty Diana edit of Tommy Shelby & Diana Mitford so why not do a fic about MJ's song?? I'm so happy that Dirty Diana is getting popular and getting the hype that it deserves !! This fic is terribly written and rushed :c Click here to see the MAIN MASTERLIST Click here to see the PEAKY BLINDERS MASTERLIST Click here to see the CILLIAN MURPHY MASTERLIST

Tommy and you were together before the war. His family happily accepted you and eventually treat you as one.

Unfortunately, you two parted ways following the battle. While you were stuck in London trying to become a banker, he was back in his hometown.

As a woman, landing a career like that hasn't been normalized yet. Often, men claim that it was a "man's job" exclusively. You met all the standards perfectly, but in the end, you were not hired. You were left with nothing as a result. No family, no home, and no money.

That's when you started working as a prostitute, something you never thought you would do. It was your last option since you could no longer survive without money. Given that you were making far more money at the job, you cannot complain about it. Constantly receiving enormous sums of shillings in a single night.

You decided to change your name, Diana.

Every night you wait on the busy streets of London for customers. Bending over their vehicle, seducing them.

It wasn't easy and it will never be easy to be working in this line of work. You've been sleeping with young, old, single, married, or even widowed men for money.

It was the usual night. Waiting for new customers as you stood on the busy streets outside of a hotel. Your black dress perfectly traced your curves, a white shoulder fur covered your elbows.

You finally saw a car stopping in front of you. A man wearing a neat navy suit, a newsboy hat decorated his hair, a cigarette burning between his lips.

Due to his hat, you cannot fully see who he was, only his mouth. You walked seductively towards the man's car, bending over the window. "Sir, I have to go home 'cause I'm so tired you see..?" you ask, pretending to be exhausted. "I hate sleeping alone, why don't you take me?" He took a bill out of his pockets and showed it to you. "My place. The hotel." he plainly said.

Seeing the large amount of bill made your eyes widened. Never in your job had you encountered a man giving you this big amount of money for one night.

"Well, I'll see what I can do with that, sir," he exited the vehicle, walking towards the hotel as you followed him. The anonymous man was walking in front of you so you cannot see his face.

You couldn't shake the thought of Tommy, no matter how many men you slept with. You still have feelings for him. You was hoping he could find you and look for you. Your first love was and is him. He was everything to you. It's not that you two split up; rather, it was more that you stopped seeing one another, no goodbye's or hello's after the war. You believed that his 'breakup' was final. that he had already had enough of your relationship. While a part of you believes he is better off without you, the other half of you longs to visit him in Birmingham. That he's already forgotten you.

The both of you were already inside his luxurious hotel room. It wasn't really that tidy but it was manageable.

The anonymous man finally removed his hat, showing his full face at you. As soon as you saw him, your eyes widened and your heart sank.

"Tommy?" you shockingly asked.

"(Y/n)." he greeted plainly.

"How did you- How did you found me?"

He actually haven't moved on from you too. Tommy tried to marry someone for you to leave his mind but that didn't worked for him as well. He just doesn't feel the same feeling that he was with his current wife than you. He wants to relive that feeling and he is hoping that he will be with you again.

"I searched for you. I searched every spot in Birmingham and you weren't there. And so I found you here. In London," he said. "And I know about your job, Diana."

His deep and sultry voice always gets you. Having the sudden desire to take him, make you his, and just be with him.

"How about you stay with me, tonight?" he asked.

"Oh Tommy, I'm all yours," you answered. Your lips meeting his, passionately tasting him. Tommy's hands roamed all around your small back, allowing the kiss to get deeper and deeper.

He suddenly stopped, pulling his face away. "My wife is at home tonight, she's probably worried tonight. I haven't told her I'm alright." he sighed, walking up to the telephone on the desk just beside the door. He rolled the numbers before speaking.

Before he said something again, you heard a woman's voice on the telephone, screaming at him. Tommy's wife was mad.

Suddenly, you grabbed the telephone, hearing the voice of his wife. The speaker was on your ear, "He's not coming back, he's sleeping with me,"

You dropped the telephone harshly, smiling at him. "Are you not worried she'll leave you?" you asked, your fingers tapping his chest seductively. Tommy's lips found yours again. The kiss is turning harshly and messier. "It's alright, she was using me for money anyways," he said in between kisses. "And Polly didn't approved my relationship with her but we got married anyway,"

"God, I've been waiting for you," your hands found its way to his hair, crumpling it as you felt his tongue explore your mouth. You moaned in between kisses, eager for more.

You pushed him into the king-sized bed's soft mattress. You unbutton your wrinkled shirt while leaving your bra on as you crawl from his legs to his hips. He showed how hard he was by the way his pants were rising. Tommy's breath hitched, his skin heats up.

"Where have you been, my darling?" he breathly asked, cupping your cheeks once again to examine your face, processing what is happening right now. You're back. You're here.

Slowly, your hips rocked on his boner, the friction making your eyes roll. Tommy swallowed hard, feeling the sensation that's happening. "I've missed you, Tom,"

You continued to stroke the hard swell beneath his pants with a look of enticing eagerness, every stroke a whispered promise of something more. You carefully and slowly removed his belt buckle, the metal clasp giving way to your touch with a gentle click. With careful care, your fingertips traced the fabric of his pants, revealing the shapes of his buried need as you undid each button. Gentle yet focused.

A rush of electricity shot through Tommy as her hands discovered his shaft, igniting every nerve ending with a burning passion. You moved his cock up and down with such delicate strokes; it was a rhythmic dance that left him panting, his chest rising and falling in time with your motions.

"Oh god, you're so good at this," he praised.

Your touch was like a kiss from heaven; it sent electric sparks of need shooting through him, burning an inferno of desire. His breath caught in his throat with every stroke, the melody of pleasure surrounding him so intensely that he was unable to resist, his moans echoing at the limits of his arousal.

He finally came, his white seed spurted all over the mattress and your hands, staining them You chuckled.

Suddenly, Tommy switched positions, he's now on top of you. "You think we're done?" he asked, his fingers touched your clit, sending shivers all around your body due to the sudden touch.

"Oh god!" you moaned.

His fingertips tracing passionate patterns over the fabric that covered your aching core, your back arched in ecstasy as he increased his speed driven by an early desire. Your body trembled with anticipation with every round move, a burning desire that cried out to be let out. Time appeared to stop still as his touch danced over you in the heat of passion, each movement an ode to the unbearable depths of his desire.

You moaned out loud, feeling your orgasm coming. "Tom - I'm gonna .. oh god!"

His movements stopped unexpectedly, leaving you on the verge of euphoria and desperate for release. A line appeared on your forehead as a wave of opposing emotions passed over you, your need pounding against the limits his seductive pause forced.

"Ah, not yet," his husky voiced rang to your ears.

Tommy removed your underwear, showing how wet you were from him fingering you. He aligned his shaft in front of your cunt before you fully took him, making you moan.

You felt full just from his cock. His warm cock filled you, making him push in even further. Your eyes closed, your head rolling back.

"So fucking tight," he exhaled deeply. His rough hands gripped your hips making him pound in to you harshly, hitting your sensitive spots all over and over.

"No one ever pleasured you this good huh?"

Sweat was streaming down his strained brow, reflecting the fever that was pumping through his body. The air in his hotel room pumped with the sound of your lewd moans and his sultry groans, echoes swirling passionately together and filling the room with a euphoric atmosphere.

His trusts became faster and harsher. His and your skin slapped together, earning a loud sound.

You felt your orgasm coming up again making you moan louder, seeing nothing but starts and feel like you've been drugged by the most pleasurable medicine there is out there. You clenched on his cock, indicating that you were close.

"Tommy, I'm gonna cum,"

"Yeah? Cum then, love," he demanded.

You both reached the your high of ecstasy with a few last, powerful thrusts, your bodies combining in a melody of pleasure. During that moment of explosive release, when your senses were overwhelmed by a rush of sensations, you felt him spill out his essence into you, filling you to the overflowing limit with his ecstatic warmth. Every muscle clenched with fine pleasure as your climax came over you in waves of joy, your combined passion setting off an inferno of desire that swallowed you both completely.

Tommy pulled out before dropping his body beside you, panting hard.

"Come back to me," he whispered.

"Oh Tommy. I never left you."

#peaky blinders #x reader #tommy shelby #cillian murphy x reader #cillian murphy #cillian murphy smut #thomas shelby #thomas shelby x reader #peaky blinder fanfic #peaky blinders x reader #thomas shelby smut #tommy shelby smut #peaky blinders smut #tommy shelby x reader #tommy shelby imagine

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imaginespazzi · 5 months ago

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Part 3: Miss Me, Miss Me Not

Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12

And it hits me when the lights go on (shit, maybe I miss you)

(In which a lazy writer somehow still manages to make her deadlines, much to her own shock)

Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd

Themes: Angst, Pining and a teensy bit of Fluff

Words: 5.8K

TW: Swearing (once again I think that's it?)

A/N: Hello my lovelies <3 I'm not gonna lie til about an hour ago, I very much did not think I was gonna give y'all a Monday update but here we are! A couple of housekeeping things, I went back and added months to the years so hopefully that's more helpful. I lowkey dislike this part but I felt like the fic needed it and I'm excited to write the next part. Ngl, the editing on this is pretty nonexistent because trying to read this back lowkey killed me so please feel free to point out mistakes so I can fix them. As always, let me know what you liked, and disliked and anything you wanna see going forward. I really appreciate all of y'alls feedback and the long reviews make my day! Have a good rest of your week lovies <3

September 2017

Azzi: just got home :)

It’s a simple text and it should be easy for Paige to conjure up an equally simple reply. Instead she finds herself typing and deleting, over and over, because nothing sounds quite right. There’s this hollow feeling thrumming in her chest, that has only gotten stronger every passing minute since she’d said goodbye to Azzi at the airport. If she tries hard enough, she can still feel the remnants of their last hug lingering against every inch of her skin. She wants to memorize that feeling and create a blanket out of its threads to numb the ice cold shiver that’s been repeatedly running through her veins from the second Azzi had gotten on that plane. But even that might not be enough. Not when she’s learnt just how warm Azzi’s presence can be and how everything else pales in comparison.

Paige lies to herself that it’s an accidental slip of her fingers, that she’d meant to press send not call, that she had every intention of hanging up the facetime on the first ring itself.

But then Azzi picks up on the second one.

And really it would be rude to hang up.

“Hey what’s up?” Azzi’s face fills the screen, tired eyes staring intently at Paige through the screen.

“Oh um-” Paige fumbles for words, awkwardly shuffling her feet that are dangling off the side of her bed, “I just wanted to ask how your flight was?”

Azzi raises an eyebrow, “you couldn’t have texted me that?”

“Too tired to text,” Paige lies and the words i just wanted to hear your voice stay stuck, burning hot, in her throat, “gotta save these money-making fingers for more important things.”

“Yeah I’m hanging up-”

“NO-” it comes out far more forceful than it should and if possible, Azzi’s eyebrow shoots up even farther, as Paige clears her throat, “I mean- uh- you didn’t tell me how your flight was.”

Paige is too busy cringing at herself to notice the light blush that tinges Azzi’s cheeks. She’s too busy wondering why this girl brings out this nervous bumbling side of hers to notice the fond smile that almost cracks through Azzi’s lips.

“The flight was okay. I actually got to sleep this time,” Azzi says pointedly and Paige laughs.

“So what you’re saying is it was boring as hell.”

“I’m saying it was really peaceful not having someone yapping in my ear while I was trying to sleep.”

“So you didn’t miss me?” Paige presses, trying to keep her voice teasing despite how desperately she wants the admission.

Azzi hesitates, as if she’s debating with herself, before, “I didn’t say that.”

It’s a little ridiculous how large Paige’s grin is but it’s okay, because Azzi’s smiling back, soft and shy. They’d look foolish to anyone else, the way they’re so intently gazing at each other through a screen as if there’s no barrier between them at all.

“It’s gonna be weird going to the gym without you tomorrow morning,” Paige confesses after a second, moving to lay down on her stomach.

“I bet. You’re gonna get absolutely nothing done without me,” Azzi teases dramatically before her eyes soften, “it’s weird that I’m not gonna see you at all tomorrow.”

There’s something gut-wrenching about that admission and yet, there’s something in it that heals a part of Paige’s heart that she hadn’t even known needed to be fixed. It means something to her that Azzi must feel it too. Because if she’s honest with herself, Paige had been just a little afraid that maybe the connection was just in her head, that maybe Azzi was simply tolerating her presence out of kindness.

“You should just move to Minnesota,” Paige replies finally, “much nicer than Virgina or whatever.”

“Have you ever even been to Virginia?” Azzi asks, eyebrows raised as she flips herself to lie on her back, holding her phone above her in a way that lets Paige see entirely too much and yet not nearly enough.

“No but it sounds boring as fuck.”

“Not with me,” Azzi says, biting her bottom lip sheepishly as soon as the words are out.

Paige smirks, suddenly filled with a brand new confidence, “yeah? You’d make Virgina interesting for me Fudd? What would we do?”

Azzi licks her lips and Paige feels her mouth go dry.

“We’d be together,” the younger girl says finally, averting her gaze as the depth of her words begin to make Paige feel like she’s being flooded by an ocean of emotions she’s not quite ready to feel yet, “anything can be interesting if we’re together.”

It would be so easy to come up with a sarcastic quip or tease Azzi for being a sap and yet there’s a certain sincerity in this moment that feels too fragile for Paige to feign nonchalance.

“Is Virginia nice in the winter?” she asks finally, hands fidgeting with the hair ties secured around her wrist, “Minny’s a little too cold sometimes.”

Azzi’s eyes shine and Paige wants to try and read them, find the little clues hidden in her irises and solve the mystery lingering behind the crimson flush of her cheeks. But the truth is that Paige is a little scared of what she’d find, a little scared that discovering Azzi might mean discovering herself too.

“You should come find out some time,” the brunette says, casual tone filled with intricacies of something far deeper. It’s the closest they’ve gotten to saying anything of actual substance and they tip-toe around saying what they both want, daring the other to ask first.

“I dunno,” Paige says, determined to win the game, “I’m not in the habit of showing up to places without a proper invite.”

Azzi scoffs, “a proper invite? Are you expecting someone to send you a carrier pigeon with a gold letter addressed to her royal highness or something?”

“That would be nice,” Paige surmises and Azzi rolls her eyes.

“Does your back ever hurt from carrying that ego?”

“Only hurts from carrying my team.”

“Oh my god you’re so full of it.”

“Full of talent? Yessirrrr.”

Azzi huffs, “Paige.”

“Azzi,” Paige hums.

“Do you wanna come visit me in Virginia during winter break?” Azzi says finally, a small smile playing on her lips like she’s okay with losing this game as long as it’s to Paige.

“If I must,” Paige says dramatically, shrugging her shoulders and everything as Azzi lets out an offended squeak. But inside, her heart flutters at the offer, at the idea of seeing Azzi again, even if it feels like a lifetime away. Because as long as it’s Azzi on the other side, Paige and her impatient self can wait however long it takes.

“Actually you know what nevermind, you don’t gotta come,” Azzi concedes bitterly, scrunching her face (and Paige would never tell her this but she thinks Azzi looks just a little too cute when she’s mad and so maybe she riles her up on purpose)

“No takesies backsies Az,” Paige sing-songs before her lips uptick from a smirk into something more sincere, “hey Az,” she whispers, giggling to herself when Azzi pretends to ignore her, “I’d really like to come see you in Virginia during winter break.”

And as a brilliant grin dazzles across Azzi’s face, Paige realizes that her favorite thing about Azzi’s smile isn’t when her dimples show or when her eyes twinkle, it’s when it’s there because of Paige, when it’s there just for Paige.

“Good,” Azzi whispers as they fall into a comfortable silence.

There’s this serene sense of calm that laces itself around Paige’s nerves. Her normally fidgeting body is content to be perfectly still, an anomaly to her usual demeanor. The truth is that Paige isn’t the kind of person who’s okay with just existing; she likes to spend every second in motion, living out the high. There’s a part of her that’s scared of missing moments, scared that the people around her will leave her behind if she doesn’t chase them. But it’s different with Azzi. The younger girl makes Paige feel like it’s okay if she takes a moment to just breathe. Because Azzi will wait. Because Azzi won’t leave Paige behind.

“Wait,” it’s a little while before Azzi pipes up, shaking Paige out of her thoughts, “what time is it?”

Paige’s eyes flicker to the time on her phone, confused by the line of questioning, “it’s almost 9 why?”

“Don’t you have a team party or something to go to tonight?” Azzi asks, face scrunching, “I swear you told me you had something tonight.”

“Oh-yeah- Amaya’s back to school thing,” Paige sheepishly scratches her neck, suddenly feeling itchy in her flannel shirt. She’d forgotten she was wearing that instead of her daily clothes. Hell, she’d forgotten she was supposed to be going somewhere in the first place, too occupied with other thoughts.

“Bro get up,” Azzi orders, “you’re already late.”

“Nah it’s fine. I don’t think I’m gonna go,” Paige says and she thinks she should probably feel a little more guilty about it.

“What do you mean you’re not gonna go?” Azzi asks in disbelief, “dude you’re the star of the team. You have to go.”

“Amaya will understand besides-” Paige drags in a deep breath, feeling vulnerable as the next words fall out in a quiet whisper, “I don’t wanna hang up yet.”

“Paige c’mon we can talk tomorrow,” Azzi tries to protest but it’s half-hearted at best.

“I wanna talk right now,” Paige argues, “you don’t wanna talk to me?”

For a second Paige thinks Azzi might just say no, might just chip away a little bit of heart with a well-intentioned rejection, but she doesn’t, “always wanna talk to you P.”

“Then don’t hang up. Talk to me.”

And Azzi does. All night.

Two weeks laters there’s a letter, in an envelope with a picture of a carrier pigeon, that arrives in the Bueckers’ mail box.

To her royal highness,

Unfortunately I couldn’t find an actual carrier pigeon (I swear I tried) so this envelope and the mailman will have to do.

~ You are formally invited this winter break to the Fudd family residence in Virginia. ~

(And you better show up Bueckers)

Yours,

Azzi

February 2033

“I can’t believe you’re leaving me,” Ice whines petulantly as she makes herself comfortable on the couch across from where Paige is getting her makeup done, “this is parental neglect.”

Paige laughs, eyes closed, her makeup artist does her mascara, “you’ll survive.”

“You don’t know that” Ice argues, plucking a grape from the fruit basket before segueing into a rant about how boring Arlington, Texas is.

Paige is grateful for the distraction her younger friend is providing. Her nerves had been on edge since the moment she’d woken up this morning, anxious to get the impending farewell press conference over with. She’d already started accepting that the Wings weren’t the right place for her but that feeling had only been heightened by her trip to the Valkyries. And ever since she’s come back, Paige feels a little bit like she’s sleepwalking through her final moments in Dallas. If she’s honest, she’s probably rushing things a little bit. There’s still plenty of time before she really has to move to Oakland but it had been her choice to move there as soon as possible. Paige had always been good at conjuring excuses and she had plenty as to why she needed to be in California so soon. But at the end of the day it isn’t about training or team bonding or any of the other hundred justifications she’s given anyone who’s asked. It’s about a little girl who’s eyes had been brimming with tears when saying goodbye, a little girl who had made Paige pinky swear that she’d be back as soon as possible.

Really, Paige thinks she should be applauded for her restraint, because truth be told, the second Stephie’s lower lip had trembled, Paige had been prepared to ask Ice to just ship her stuff to Oakland so that she’d never have to let go of the little girl’s hand.

And here’s the thing, Paige is willing to admit she wants to go back to the Bay Area for Stephie. It’s that pesky little part of her that’s desperate to go back for Stephie’s mother, to go back for one more hesitant yet lingering touch, that she won’t ever share with anyone else.

“I never thought I’d live to see you and Azzi willingly playing together again,” Ice says as soon as Paige’s makeup artist leaves the room, “KK and I didn’t even try betting on it, we were that sure it wouldn’t happen. Shit I should have. I totally would have won.”

“Don’t y’all get tired of betting on my life?” Paige asks, rolling her eyes, trying to ignore the first part of what Ice said.

“Betting on your life has made me hundreds of dollars bro,” Ice says, before a more earnest look crosses her face, “but genuinely P, are you sure about this? There’s a lot of history there.”

Paige sighs, “it’s not about our history. It’s a basketball decision. And we’re both mature adults who know that. I’m just tryna win. Nothing else.”

“It’s never nothing when it comes to you two.”

“It is this time,” Paige argues adamantly and Ice raises her hands in surrender.

“I just don’t want another set of teammates to have to deal with y’alls bullshit,” the younger girl teases, but it’s laced with a hint of seriousness that sends a flare of guilt shooting through Paige’s body.

“Ice-” she begins.

But Ice is quick to change to a lighter subject, “can’t believe Jana’s the one that gets mom and dad back together. I always knew she was the favorite.”

“We didn’t have favorites,” Paige plays along, thankful for Ice and her ability to always keep the tension to a bare minimum.

“Oh don’t lie. We all know you did,” Ice scoffs and then lets out a chuckle, “and now Azzi’s actually a mom. That’s kinda insane. And you met the kid right?”

“Yeah. Yeah I did,” Paige says and she can’t help the way her entire face breaks into a gleaming smile as her thoughts turn into memories of Stephie. She doesn’t even realize she’s gotten lost in a different world until Ice coughs, an amused grin playing on her lips.

“You’re so royally fucked Paige,” Ice shakes her head, “the only person I’ve seen you smile that big for before is Azzi.”

“She’s a cute, smart, adorable kid, that’s why I’m smiling,” Paige tries to defend herself.

“She’s Azzi’s cute, smart, adorable kid,” Ice counters.

“That has nothing to do with it,” Paige protests again but it rings hollow to her own ears.

“Oh my god I needa call KK and get this bet started. It’s only a matter of time for real,” Ice says, more to herself than to Paige, as she whips out her phone, probably texting KK.

“A matter of time till what?”

“You’ll find out Paigey,” Ice says gravely with a mocking smile, patting Paige’s head, “all in due time.”

***

The Dallas Wings media room is buzzing, reporters desperate to ask Paige questions and the blonde tries to maintain a smile despite the fact that her heart is lurching in her throat right now. Her opening speech had been short and sweet, parroting basically the same thing that had gone out on her social media the night before; she’d been desperate to just get it out. Generally, Paige is pretty good with the media, having been immersed in the spotlight since basically forever. The attention and how to maneuver it has always come naturally to her so she’s not sure why she feels so unnerved by it all today. From the back of the media room, Ice sends her a thumbs up and a reassuring grin and Paige lets out a breath, glad to have at least that comforting presence with her.

“Aidrian Ginsburger with Bleacher Report, Paige, you’ve obviously spent all of your career so far with the Wings, can you tell us a little bit about the impact this organization has had on you?”

Paige smiles at the question, letting her brain skim through pages and pages of fond memories she has of time spent with this team. It might be time to move on but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t have plenty of cherished moments.

“Yeah um- this place has really shaped who I am as a person. Since day one, the front office, obviously it’s a different one to the one I came in with, they did a lot to make sure that I was comfortable. My teammates through the years have been incredible and I wouldn’t be the player I am today without them. And of course the fans you know, they always showed out for the team, for me. Always supported me in anyways and I hope that I was able to give back the love to them that they always gave to me,” she says, suddenly nostalgic for the team that had started it all.

The next questions are similar in nature and Paige’s answer varies only in words but not substance. She feels herself start to settle into it, now fielding the expected questions about the Wings and Valkyries with an air of confidence. There are a couple questions about Azzi that make her heart thump, but that was to be expected. It’s a pretty brilliant story in the making, two MVPs who used to play on the same college team coming together. Talia had warned Paige in advance that there was no avoiding it. But for the most part the questions have an easy answer about how Azzi’s a brilliant player and she’s excited to play with her old friend again. That is until a familiar hand shoots up and all the tension that had previously dissipated, comes roaring back with a vengeance.

“Olivia Reynolds with the Dallas Morning News, Paige, as others have said today, you and Azzi Fudd played together at UConn and you were best friends.” Olivia’s eyes glint viciously, “I mean it’s pretty well documented how hard you tried to recruit her to UConn. But despite being best friends, the two of you have been never seen hanging out, outside of games and formal events, unlike your other teammates that is-”

“Is there a point to this?” Paige asks, hands fisting in her lap as she tries to keep herself calm.

Olivia smiles, sugary sweet, “I was just wondering if maybe there was some tension and how that would affect your on-court chemistry at the Valkyries?”

“There’s no tension,” Paige lies through gritted teeth, “we didn’t hang out because we live far apart. There isn’t much else to it. And even if there was, Azzi and I are professionals. We wouldn’t let anything off the court affect our goal to win.”

“You lived far apart before UConn too, but that didn’t seem to stop you guys. What changed?” Olivia presses.

“Time did. Our lives did. There’s nothing sensational here. It’s just a case of two people drifting apart,” Paige says and the fabrication feels heavy on her tongue. If only it really had been that simple.

“But clearly not that much,” Olivia says, and Paige glances at the moderator, desperate for an intervention, “there were plenty of fan pictures of the two of you out getting ice cream with Azzi’s daughter. It seems like you’re already fitting into that Bay Area life-”

“I’m not hearing a question at the end of your sentence,” Paige hisses and she can practically already hear the scolding she’s going to get from Talia once her agent gets wind of how this press conference had gone. The entire media cohort is watching the exchange with wide eyes, no doubt questioning whether they were embarrassed or impressed by their colleague. Ice is mouthing something to Paige, probably something along the lines of please keep your shit together, but Paige is steaming. Really, she should have expected this.

“Well if you’d let me finish,” Olivia snarls, the façade of innocence dropping, “even if the two of you have drifted, as you put it, clearly there’s still a relationship there. How big of a role did Azzi Fudd play in your choice to move to the Valkyries?”

Paige sucks in a deep breath, nails digging into her palm at the question, “Azzi is the best shooting guard in the country. That was her role in my decision to move to the Valkyries. I don’t know what else you’re trying to imply, but I want to play with her because we play well together. That’s it,” she stands up and there’s pin drop silence, “thank you all for coming but we’re done with this press conference.

***

Paige is seething as she exits the media room, Ice hot on her heels trying to calm her down. The sane part of her knows she should head back to the makeup room or even to her car, instead she finds her feet carrying her in the direction of where she knows Olivia Reynolds will be, reviewing her press conference notes by the coffee machine like she always is.

“What the actual fuck was that?” Paige spits as she comes to a halt in front of the reporter.

“I know you think playing basketball is the only job in the world Paige, but that was a reporter doing her job,” Olivia says, her calm and composed voice only furthering Paige’s irritation.

“Bull-fucking-shit.” Paige sneers, “that wasn’t a reporter out there, that was my ex-wife grilling me like we were back in fucking divorce court.”

Olivia cocks her head, “oh so you do remember who I am to you then?”

“Oliv-”

“Because if you did remember, I’d like to think you’d have the courtesy to at least personally tell me that you were moving to your,” she drops her voice, “ex-girlfriend’s team instead of letting me find out with the rest of the world. You don’t think you owed me that?”

“That’s what this is about?” Paige sighs, “Olivia we’ve been divorced for almost three years now, I don’t owe you-”

“You didn’t owe Azzi anything either,” Olivia whisper-yells, the calm in her voice replaced by the same anger that had tainted the last year of their marriage, “but when we first started dating, you kept us a secret for months. You wouldn’t even tell your fucking teammates cause you were so scared she’d find out,” her eyes drift towards Ice who looks like she wishes she’d made a different decision rather than following Paige out here, “you said she deserved to hear it from you but apparently I don’t-’

“I didn’t mean it like that Olivia. Look, I meant what I said up there. There’s nothing between- ”

“Spare me,” Olivia says, as she stuffs her notepad into her bag, “you can lie to all those other reporters out there about how all of this is a basketball decision. You can even lie to yourself if you want. But you can’t lie to me, not when I spent four years fighting to keep our relationship from getting crushed under whatever it is that Azzi is to you.”

***

It doesn’t matter how far Paige burrows her head into her pillows, she can’t seem to stop herself from hearing Olivia’s words reverberating through her ears. The two of them had done well at co-existing in their social circles after the divorce had been finalized. While no one could quite call them friends, they’d done a good job at being friendly, being able to converse and share an occasional drink when in their combined friend group. And if Paige is honest, she knows she’s fucked up, knows she probably did owe Olivia a call. But calling Olivia would have meant calling someone who would inevitably make Paige face the truth, just like she had today. The truth that, even with the deal Talia had concocted with the Liberty hanging in the background like a dark presence, the move to the Valkyries was about a lot more than just basketball for Paige.

She’s so entrenched in her thought that she doesn’t bother checking who it is when the facetime rings, irritation seeping into her voice as she answers it, face still buried in her pillows, “WHAT?”

“Miss Buecks?” a tiny voice comes through the phone and for a second, Paige thinks she must be dreaming, until she finally lifts her head to look at her phone, and Stephie’s small face lights up the whole screen. And it’s like she can feel little hands on her shoulders, slowly unknotting her tightened muscles.

“Stephie,” she breathes out, a sudden sense of serene calm washing over her previously tense body.

“Hi Miss Buecks,” Stephie says happily before she squints at the screen, “you sleep weird.”

Paige laughs, “and why’s that?”

“You’re not wearing pajamas and it’s only seven. ‘Dults don’t sleep at seven,” Stephie says matter-of-factly.

“It’s actually nine here,” Paige says, a little surprised by the time; she hadn’t realized she'd been moping in her bed for that long. Ice had forced her to get lunch together, not wanting to leave Paige alone after the encounter with Olivia. Once she’d finally gotten back to her apartment, Paige had flopped on her bed, taking out her frustrations on her poor pillow.

“That’s not poss-ble,” Stephie scrunches her face, “Mama’s phone says it’s seven.”

“It’s seven in California, it’s nine in Texas,” Paige tries to explain though by the way Stephie’s looking at her, she thinks she’s probably just confusing the girl more, “how’d you figure out how to call me babe?”

Stephie gives her an exasperated look, “Miss Buecks I’m five. I know how to use facetime.”

“And does your Mama know you're facetiming me?” Paige asks, eyebrows raised.

“She’s in the shower,” Stephie whispers, grinning sheepishly.

As if on cue, Azzi appears on the corner of the screen and Paige feels her mouth run dry. The darker skinned woman is clad in a light pink fluffy bathrobe that ends right above her knees, giving Paige the perfect view of her long, toned legs that seem to shimmer despite the shitty quality of the facetime. Rivulets of water cling to her neck, delicately cascading down the valley of her breasts before disappearing from sight. And Paige must be dehydrated because never has she wanted to taste a drop of liquid more than she does right now.

“Stephie,” Azzi groans, as she walks towards the phone and Paige gulps, heart beating faster with every step the other woman takes, everything about her becoming clearer and clearer, “what did I say about using my phone.”

“Only in em-a-gencies,” Stephie recites, “but Mama I had an em-a-gency.”

Azzi tilts her head, eyebrows raised as she gives her daughter a knowing look, “and what was your emergency?”

“I really, really, really, this much” Stephie stretches out her hands as far as they’ll go, really, really, really, miss Miss Buecks.”

Paige feels her heart flutter. Stephie’s words feel like a hand carefully pulling her out from under the pile of stress she’d been buried under the whole day. It’s like the little girl is pushing away the rubble pressing against her lungs, turning the rocks into dust with a light touch and Paige feels like she can finally breathe.

“Sounds like a pretty big emergency to me,” she says, relishing the way Stephie’s face lights up at the admission, “cause I really, really, really miss you too Steph.”

“See Mama,” Stephie says, placing the phone against a wall so can place her hands on her hips and look up at Azzi with a pleased smirk.

Azzi rolls her eyes before glaring at Paige, “you’re a bad influence on her.”

“I’m the best influence on her,” Paige argues, sending Stephie a conspiratorial wink, “just you wait Az, I’mma teach her all the good things.”

Something unreadable flashes across Azzi’s face before she’s back to looking at Paige with an unimpressed arched eyebrow, “I am not letting you corrupt my daughter Paige Bueckers.”

“We’ll see,” Paige says slowly and Azzi shakes her head before turning to Stephie.

“Alright Stephie bean time to go brush your teeth. It’s almost bedtime babes,” she says with a stern look

“But Mama-”

“No arguing, you have school tomorrow missy,” Azzi reminds the little girl and Paige can’t help but marvel at the mother that Azzi’s become. And it makes her heart ache for the fantasies she’d dreamed of when she was in her early twenties. She’d always known Azzi would be a great mother; Paige had just naively thought she’d be there alongside her too.

“Can Miss Buecks stay on the phone till I fall asleep?” Stephie asks, peering up at Azzi with big doe eyes, “please Mama pleeeease.”

“I’m sure Miss Buecks has other things-”

“I don’t,” Paige cuts in far too enthusiastically, clearing her throat to get back some semblance of restraint as both mother and daughter turn to look at each other, “I don’t have anything to do tonight so I can stay till you fall asleep Stephie.”

“YAYY,” Stephie cheers enthusiastically while Azzi studies her with a weary look, “I’m gonna go brush my teeth and then you can read me, my story Mama.”

With that, the little girl runs in the direction of what Paige can only assume is the bathroom, skipping with childlike joy as she sing-songs about something Paige can’t quite make out.

“You know you don’t have to say yes to everything she asks right?” Azzi says slowly as she grabs her phone and sits on the couch.

Paige shrugs, “I have time to stay.”

“Do you?” Azzi asks skeptically, “because from what I heard the Wings are having a little farewell party tonight, for you.”

Paige narrows her eyes, “and how exactly did you hear that?”

“I have connections.”

“You talked to Ice.”

“I talked to Ice,” Azzi concedes, “and I’m pretty sure you’re already an hour or so late for it.”

“Exactly. I’m already an hour late so why bother,” Paige says, sitting up so she can rest head against her headboard, “why were you talking to Ice?”

“I can’t talk to my friend?” Azzi asks slowly.

“Of course you can but why specifically today?” Paige presses

Azzi bites her lip, “I um- I watched your press conference today. You uh-” she averts her gaze, “you seemed really stressed at the end and I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

A soft grin upturns Paige’s lips before she can stop it, “were you worried for me Fudd?”

“That’s not-” Azzi groans, “shut up.”

Paige smirks, “you were worried for me.”

“I was concerned for my future teammate," Azzi huffs, “besides,” her face hardens, “she was way out of line.”

Paige sighs at the implied mention of Olivia, “maybe but maybe I deserved it.”

“No you didn’t,” Azzi protests and that oh so familiar protective tone in her voice carves itself into every crevice of Paige’s heart, “no one deserves to be put on the spot like that. She was being unethical trying to dig into your personal life like that.”

“This is nice,” Paige says softly, unable to help herself.

“What is?”

“Seeing you get all defensive over me. It's nice to see you still care. I didn’t know if you still did.”

Azzi’s quiet for a second, gnawing at her bottom lip as she looks at Paige, “I’ve always cared Paige. And-” she hesitates as the tightrope beneath them wavers, “I’m always gonna care.”

There’s years worth of unsaid words lingering in the silence between them as they breach some unspoken rule they’d both inadvertently agreed to. And they both know that they shouldn’t be saying things like this to each other, that they’re teetering on the edge of falling into an abyss that has nothing but destruction at the bottom. But Azzi’s words feel like sunshine, like heat waves across her skin and Paige is so tired of feeling cold.

Before either of them can say another word, Stephie comes back into the room, crawling into Azzi’s lap.

“I’m back,” she beams, completely unaware of the way the two adults are scrambling to act normal around her.

“Here baby,” Azzi hands the phone to Stephie, “take Miss Buecks to your room. Mama’s gonna go change and then she’ll come read to you okay?”

“‘Kay Mama,” Stephie complies, pressing a soft kiss to Azzi’s cheek before running towards her room. For a second Paige’s screen is blurred in motion until Stephie fixes her again and Paige catches a glimpse of Stephie’s room, specifically the walls that are painted the perfect shade of Valkyrie purple.

“I love your walls Stephie,” she compliments.

“They’re pu-ple,” Stephie exclaims, “that’s my favorite color.”

“First the ice-cream, now the color, you’re stealing all of my favorites kid,” Paige teases but she’s secretly pleased by this revelation. It’s dangerous how fast Stephie’s starting to whittle down Paige’s walls and build herself a permanent shelf in Paige’s cabinet of my people.

“Can I tell you a secret Miss Buecks,” Stephie whispers, bringing her lips closer to the phone.

Paige smiles, “of course you can.”

“I think Mama misses you too,” Stephie says softly and Paige feels her heart catch in her throat, “I heard her tell Nanna on the phone.”

“Can I tell you a secret Stephie?” Paige lowers her voice, leaning into her phone.

“‘Course you can Miss Buecks.”

Paige swallows as the admission falls from her lips, “I really miss your Mama too.”

I miss her always and I think I’ll miss her forever.

“What are you the two of you whispering about,” Azzi’s voice cuts in as she tucks herself next to Stephie, a children’s book in her hand.

“Nothing Mama,” Stephie says immediately, winking at Paige through the phone.

“Yeah,” Paige echoes, ignoring her erratic heartbeat, “nothing Azzi.”

Azzi looks between the both of them, clearly aware she’s being left out of something, but doesn’t push further. Instead she flips open the book, pulls Stephie closer into her arms and starts reading. If anyone were to ask Paige later, she wouldn’t have the faintest idea about a single word in that damn book. Because as Azzi’s soothing voice begins to lull Stephie to sleep, and the younger girl, despite her yawns, holds the phone up so the blonde can be included in every second of it, Paige feels herself being pulled into a dream she has no right to dream. She dreams of being in Stephie’s purple bedroom. She dreams of her and Azzi lying against Stephie’s lilac bedspread, their hands entwined in the middle over Stephie’s little body. She dreams of a forever that she’d long forsaken.

#pazzi #paige bueckers #azzi fudd #wcbb

341 notes · View notes

voltronisanobsession · 1 year ago

Note

Hi hello! I hope your having a good day

This might be a little boring but what about a Percy x reader childhood friends to lovers?

Percy had a fat crush on reader growing up (and never gets over them) but then he was swept away to camp half blood so suddenly so he didn’t have time to say anything to reader, and because of the no cellphone rule at camp reader is like all up in their feels thinking their best friend just left without telling them. So when reader sees Percy at school in the winter they kinda avoid him assuming that he was doing the same, basically they drift apart.

But a year or two later, it turns out reader is also a Demi god just found out later in life maybe a child of Apollo or smt, so they come to camp and they see Percy and suddenly everything is making sense, like why he left on such a short notice why he never contacted them, etc. then Percy and reader just have this little catch up where they realize they still have feelings for each other ,but are maybe too nervous to admit because they don’t wanna ruin their friendship again?

It’s so cliché I know, but I’m such a sucker for the childhood friends to lovers trope.

Percy with a Childhood Friend

Omg this is so CUTE ARGGH!! This is my second time writing this cuz I accidentally deleted everything the first time </3

It’s a little long since I wanted to somewhat incorporate a story🔥 not proofread🔥🔥

Edit: I finished proofreading this and DAMN there were a lot of errors💀💀 do not write when ur about to pass out guys💀

This is literally the cutest idea EVER!!

You guys would totally become friends because of your mutual confusion with school💀 Like you both bond over struggling with school and immediately grow closer

Since he could remember, Percy always had a harder time learning the materials in school and was outcasted for it in a way

So when you sit next to him during recess and start talking to him out of nowhere, he knows you guys are gonna be stuck with each other for a long time

Since you're basically his first friend, in like forever, he can't help the growing feeling he has for you

The way you brightly smile at him when he asks for help on a reading he can’t quite seem to grasp, or the way you patch him up after getting into a fight with one of the bullies

You’re just like the light in his life, you’re warm presence immediately settling his anxiousness

You guys are stuck together like glue and no one can seem to separate you both, something that many have tried to do

Percy believes that nothing can get better than this honeymoon phase in your friendship, swearing that he’s going to confess his small crush on you and everything😭

Until he’s kicked out of school and your family moves away and you begin attending Yancy Academy💀💀

Percy is obviously just as heart broken as you

So for the next few years, Percy faces all these new schools alone and gets kicked out of all them

And when he’s sent to Yancy Academy and finally reunited with you again, he quite literally JUMPS on you

Like this boy is SO HAPPY to see you omg

That spark never left between the two of you and you both make up for lost time

So while school is still the same, getting to see you everyday now is a game changer for Percy

The buried feelings come back full force, your warm and bright smile still making him feel gooey inside after all this time

And you’re just as nervous to him too cuz AHHH!! Childhood crush is back!!

Of course we all know how this ends, Percy is unfortunately kicked out of school again and you’re both heartbroken in the end

Percy leaves mysteriously while you’re wondering where he went

You question Grover on the boys disappearance, the satyr giving you a nervous look while saying Percy didn’t feel quite right attending the school

Which confused and hurt you because Percy had said you made going to this prison worth it

Percy never got to say his goodbyes and is suddenly dragged into the half blood life, continuing his life with danger at every corner

Even after going on all these exciting and dangerous quests, years later Percy will never be able to stop his mind from straying to the one he let get away

He feels regret for the most part and probably thinks you hate him for leaving you so suddenly💀

He often wonders what your doing

Maybe your reading a book from that one author you like

Or maybe you’ve picked up a new hobby. Last time he saw you, you did mention you’ve had this strong urge to learn archery

School starts again and Percy is once again sent to a new school

He’s already anticipating going to camp next year but is immediately caught off guard when he sees you in the distance in one of the school halls

It’s LITERALY like time slows down

His eyes widen when he makes eye contact with you, the light hitting your face in a certain angle that makes you look ethereal

He feels his heart speeding up when your recognize him from the distance

Your face is scrunched up in confusion and then hurt, quickly looking away from him and walking down a different hallway

He’s so happy to see a familar face that he doesn’t even think about how you might be feeling after not seeing him these past few years

Percy looks different. Hes way taller than he was before. His hair is longer and messier, but makes it work. His face is more defined, skin glowing even under the florescent lights

You can’t deny the way your heart skipped a beat at seeing Percy again but everything crumbles down when you remember his unannounced departure from Yancy Academy

‘He could’ve at least told me’ you bitterly think while slamming your locker

Yeah you would avoid him like the plague while school’s in session

Walking in the opposite direction when you see him and avoiding his eyes when he tries to get your attention during class

It isn’t until when a monster interrupts the formal winter dance that you finally speak to him

Percy is trying his best to fight off the monster when it knocks him to the ground with a force that has him hackling for air

That’s when you come to the rescue

“Percy get down!”

“Y/N?!”

With a bow and arrow in hand, you aim for the beast with such precision and confidence, he stares in amazement as you single handily slay the monster with one arrow

He unfortunately has to flee the scene when he hears people barreling down the hallways, anxious to see all the commotion he caused

Yeah he gets to camp early that year💀

And when this guy sees you at camp during the summer, everything suddenly clicks in his head

The way you could see the monster and WERENT affected by the mist

Your scary accurate hit with a bow that seemingly came out of nowhere

And even the way the sun would shine in your favor in random moments

When you see Percy though, your confusion is maxed out. Was this why he left? Why you were never able to get ahold of him?

Yeah things are a little awkward during this time

While you’re put into the Apollo cabin after being claimed and adjusting to camp, Percy finds a hard time to talk to you

He’s SUPER excited knowing you’re a half blood too

He doesn’t have to worry about keeping any secrets from you and can tell you all about his journey throughout the years!!!

But fate seems to pull you and him further apart, bit by bit

He’s forced to hear your contagious laughter from afar during dinner, watching with soft eyes as your siblings surround you, nudging you suggestively when they catch him staring at you

You look over to him and send him a shy smile, in which he would perk up at finally getting your attention :D

After that night, things get a little easier

He’s still dragged away whenever he tries to approach you, but now he isn’t the only one trying to talk

You both wave whenever you see each other

Percy still stares at you whenever a camper tries asking him a question

While you try to walk up to him, he’s magically bombarded by other campers crowding him

He would push past them all to finally get to you after you nod your head to the side, urging him to follow you

“Yeah you know what guys? How about we catch up with this during the campfire! Yeah yeah, totally, see ya!”

He’s jogging up to you as you both walk the shore

“Well aren’t you popular here.” You say with a sly smile

“Oh yeah, I’m kinda known around camp. I’ve had a few uh, memorable, moments.” This dude is blushing like crazy cuz FINALLY! He’s finally alone with you!

After settling everything between you two, once again you’re stuck together

Training together despite your different weapons, doing activities together is a new norm

Except things are different this time

Percy isn’t the shy boy he was when he was young

He’s more confident and wants to make his intentions know to you

While he shows you how to use his sword during training, you guys already know he’s placing his hands over yours to show you the ‘correct placement’

So sly teehee

During the art and craft activities , he’s suggesting you guys to make a matching bracelet

His smooth flirting isn’t missed by you and you’re literally having a HEARTATTACK

You aren’t used to Percy being so bold, buts it’s honestly such a nice change of pace

He would definitely confess his feelings after dinner near the shore

And despite his suave attitude the past weeks, he’s so clumsy when he reveals his feelings for you

“So um, I like y- wait. Ok ok, sorry. What I wanted to say is that like, I like you. A lot actually. For a while. And you know it’s completely fine if you don’t, but I hope you like me the same because this would be really embarrassing for me-“

“Percy! It’s ok um! I like you too. A lot.”

It’s SUPER CHEESY BUT LIKE

COME ON

HES GIVING YOU PUPPY DOG EYES WHEN YOU SAY THAT AND UGH

He’s would totally lift you up and spin you around because he’s so HAPPY

Bro finally got his crush😭😭

He’s so sweet to you like bro

Always hyping you up during mock battles, cheering you on during camp games even if you’re aren’t on the same team

You already know he’s willing to lay down his life for you😭

And you wouldn’t hesitate to do the same even if he begs you not to say that (he doesn’t want to even think of the thought of you leaving him)

He’s an extremely affectionate person, pda is his middle name

If you aren’t that comfortable with pda though, he’ll settle with just holding your hand. He’ll just cuddle you later in private😻🔥🔥

But of course you guys are still best friends so you both would still clown the other if one of you does something stupid

He would love it if you play with his hair

He would be sitting in front of you during the campfire while you’re on a log seat when you brush some hair away from his face.

You rub his head a bit and Percy would lean his head into your hands.

When you’re done you pull away only for your boyfriend to bring your hands back to his hair, silently asking you to continue (UGHHHH MY HEART)

Sally loves you and is supportive of you guys (your number one supporter)

She invites you to have dinner with them and how could you refuse😩

Percy is so down bad for you and always brags about how long you both have known each other and how close you are

Like no one cares but he’ll just keep and talking about you to anyone around

Sometimes when you bunk in his cabin for a night or two, he likes talking about the past and how far you’ve both come

It’s during these nights where he’ll get emotional, maybe cry because he’s so grateful he has you in his life

You would kiss his tears away (SCREAMING)

Overall, childhood friends to lovers works out PERFECTLY with Percy. He values your friendship as much as he values your relationship

He knows you better than anyone in your life, has seen different versions of yourself and has always stuck by your side, through thick and thin💔

#pjo x reader #pjo headcanon #Percy jackson #Percy jackson x reader #percy jackson and the olympians x reader #percy jackson and the olympians #percy jackson headcanon #pjo percy #pjo #pjo headcanons #x reader #headcanons

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ahgasegotarmy116 · 8 months ago

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The Art of Etiquette Part 9 | Jeon Jungkook

Summary: Your call with Jesse is dramatic on his part to say the least but looks like there's a new guy in town and he's got his sights set on you. Pairing: f!reader x Etiquette instructor Jungkook Word Count: 2.2k~ Warnings: Explicit and suggestive language but barely lmao a/n: Sorry this one is a little shorter guys but I figured this was a good stopping point so I hope you enjoy it 🥰 p.s. barely edited as always lol Start from the beginning

"Hello?" I say, my voice ridden with exhaustion since I was woken up out of a sound sleep from my phone ringing on full blast.

"Hello? That's all you have to say to me? Girl I've been texting you since last night and you never responded" Jesse scolds through the phone and when I look at my messages I have over 50 from him alone.

"I'm sorry Jess I was busy with Jungkook all day yesterday and I just ended up taking a shower and going to sleep. I guess I forgot to tell you how it went" I apologize, rubbing the sleep from my eye. "Tell me everything I don't care if you're all over the place I just need to live vicariously though you" he says, his excitement palpable even though the phone.

"Well we went to the modiste and found my dress an-" "No no I don't care about the boring stuff. Tell me about what happened between you and Jungkook. Did you guys share glances? Did he touch you? Did he hold your hand? You know the juicy stuff. Well, I guess as juicy as you could get with an etiquette teacher" he spouts off, trying to keep me on track.

"I thought you said you wanted to live vicariously through me? So I was taking you through my day step by step" I say, smiling at his impatience. "I meant the good stuff" he groans and I laugh at his playful frustration before having mercy on him and telling him everything.

"I found out that we like the same music and like similar foods and that he really is a nice guy. Under all of that commanding and strict nature he truly is a great guy" I admit, morning thoughts now full of him giving me a fuzzy feeling in my chest.

"You're falling for him aren't you?" Jesse asks, amused once he hears how I've changed my toon so quickly from one day to the next. "I wouldn't say I'm falling for him but there are some, stirrings" I say, confused and still half asleep, not being able to fully express my emotions properly.

"Stirrings?" Jesse laughs, knowing what I'm meaning to say without actually having to say it but still pushing me to say more "Yes stirrings and let's leave it at that for now" I say, sitting up and stretching before getting out of bed.

"Whatever you say" he sings leaving me rolling my eyes as walk to the bathroom and start to pull out the various things I need to get ready. "He also kinda sorta kissed me" I mumble and immediately pull my phone away from my ear, knowing how loud he's going to get about me hiding this from him for so long.

"HE KISSED YOU? LIKE FOR REAL THIS TIME?" he asks, repeating his reaction from last time but needing to clarify right away since things have been interesting between us to say the least.

"Well it wasn't full on but it was more than last time" I smirk, knowing that Jesse's way more excited about this than I am. "What's that supposed to mean" he asks quickly, dying to know since this is probably the most important piece of the puzzle he had been waiting for.

"Well I walked him out to his car after he dropped me off to say goodbye, and well he..." "Y/n I swear if you don't just spit it out I'm going to come over there and strangle it out of you" he growls and I laugh, always loving the feeling of torturing him.

"Alright alright. So when I walked him out he said goodnight to me but when he said it, he said it against my lips. Like he brushed his lips against mine and just left me there and drove off like nothing happened" I say and the silence on the other side of the phone worries me.

"Jesse?" I ask and then I hear what sounds like him punching his pillow or something. "Jesse are you alright?" I laugh and soon he takes in a deep breath and yell out "HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE LIVING MY DREAM?!?!?!" and I bust out laughing while he scolds me on the other end of the phone.

"What are you doing?!?!?! You're literally wasting precious time that you could be using to let him fuck your brains out all because he just likes playing games with you. He wants you so bad so just go for it! If not for your own sake then for mine" he whines and I just continue to laugh, trying not to take him seriously because if I do I don't know if I'll be able to act like I don't want him too.

"When's the ball?" Jesse asks after I had been tuning him out for a second or two. "Next Saturday" I answer and he hums, thinking about if he can squeeze me in for something or other. "Why?" I ask, his silence peaking my interest.

"Well I wanted to see if you'd let me come and help you get ready for the ball? You know, hair, makeup, nails the whole nine yards" he says and I groan thinking about all of that stuff thrown together in one day.

"My guess is that my mom is gonna either have someone come over to get me ready or that she'll send me to some sort of shop. If you want you could come with? Maybe get a manicure to while we're at it?" I offer and I can just tell how excited he is about it already.

"Yes yes a thousand times yes! I swear every time I've asked you to do anything that is remotely girly you've always said no so there's no way I'm passing up on this one!" he says and I can't help but smile. "Well I'm glad that I'll have someone by my side to help me endure this torture" I groan and he brushes me off, my claims sounding absolutely ridiculous to him.

"Anyways I've gotta get ready for class so I'll see you then alright?" I say, checking the clock, thankfully seeing that I have more than enough time to do so. "Alright well hurry up so we can grab some coffee or something beforehand because I'm exhausted" I scoff at his words, since he was the one that woke me up two hours before my alarm was supposed to go off.

"Why the hell would you be tired? You're the one that woke me up!" and he scoffs right back at me. "I was getting impatient alright! And rightfully so! How could you not tell me he kissed you?" he whines and I know this is my cue to wrap up the call.

"He didn't kiss me alright. If he does you'll be the first to know, I promise. Unless someone sees of course" I say and he sighs dramatically, impatient with how slowly this whole thing is playing out.

"Yeah yeah whatever, I'll see you soon. Should I just grab you something and meet you at our table?" he asks and I hum before responding. "Please and thank you" I say, dragging out the last word and soon end the call.

Classes go off without a hitch with Jesse bugging me every other second about Jungkook so I guess it was a pretty normal day to say the least. "Tell me if anything happens at your lessons today alright? No more late updates! I'm honestly still mad at you" he groans before picking up his stuff to go.

"Yeah yeah whatever. See you later loser" I say, rolling my eyes and he rolls his right back at me even more dramatically. "Bye bitch" he says over his shoulder, giving me one last wave before walking to his last class while I make my way to mine.

Walking into class I'm greeted by the murmurings of almost all the girls in class all aimed at one guy in particular that I'd never seen before. Granted I don't really pay attention to anyone in this class besides the professor anyways but seeing that there's a big enough reaction, my interest can't help but be peaked.

As I make my way over to my usual spot in the lecture hall I begin to notice that he's sat right across the aisle from me.

I try to keep to myself and quietly go to my seat and pray he doesn't notice me because the last thing I need is a some guy trying to distract me in class.

Don't get me wrong I'm not saying that I don't like helping people but, no actually I guess I really don't like helping people now that I think about it. That's besides the point though. All I need to worry about is getting through this lecture and getting out of here so I can make it to my lessons on time with Jungkook.

As the professor finally makes his way into the classroom and starts to set up I hear someone trying to get my attention.

"Psst" I hear and know exactly who it is, making me cringe but deciding to acknowledge him nonetheless. I look up at him and realize why those girls had been whispering about him since he, putting it as plainly as I can, is a very attractive human being.

"What?" I respond and he grants me a smile that would make any other girl swoon, I however am not that girl.

"Do you have a pencil I could borrow?" he asks, giving me the lamest excuse in the book to get a girl's attention. I summon all the strength I have in my body to resist rolling my eyes and decide to just reach into my bag and grab him one, hoping to be done with this conversation as soon as possible so I can focus on the lecture.

I hand him the pencil and feel him purposefully brush his hand against mine and I pull my hand back, making him drop it and gaining the attention of the professor.

"Is there a problem Mr. Foster?" the professor says to the freeloader next to me. "No sir, no problem at all" he says smoothly, trying to charm is way out of the scolding. "See that there isn't" the professor says, raising an eyebrow at him while the boy apologizes making the lecture resume after that.

~~~~

"Hey" the guy calls out after me as I make my way out of the classroom. I stop and look at him, only planning on giving him seconds to say his piece before leaving, knowing that I'll get an earful from Jungkook if I'm late again. I raise a brow at him as he smiles down at me and doesn't make moves to say anything first.

"Can I help you?" I say, finally breaking the ice and wanting to get to the point. "Actually you already did. I just wanted to give you your pencil back" he says holding it out to me with a bright smile. "Keep it" I say and turn my back to go and unfortunately he follow after me.

"What's your name?" he asks after squeezing through the students in the halls so he can walk next to me. "None of your business" I grumble and try to walk faster but he follows all the same.

"That's a curious name" he chuckles, refusing to take the hint to the fact that I don't want to talk to him. "Can't you just leave me alone?" I question, stopping in my tracks, trying my hand at this method rather than just trying to outrun him which seems futile at this point based off of how long his legs are compared to mine.

"I just wanted to thank my savior since I would've fallen even further behind in class if I wasn't able to take any notes today" he says and I cross my arms, knowing for a fact that half the time he was just looking at me since I could feel his eyes on me every time he looked my way.

"The best way to thank me is to leave me alone. I've got things to do and I don't have time to waste on you Foster" I say, using his last name since that's all I know so far. "It's Daniel" he chuckles at my effort to push him off (figuratively of course, thankfully he has manners enough to maintain personal space).

"I prefer Foster" I say sarcastically and he laughs as if I've said the funniest thing in the world. "Foster it is then" he agrees and I groan, walking off to my car and luckily this time he doesn't follow me, watching me from where we had been standing until I'm out of his sight.

'Just when I thought my day was going well I've some how created a tail. Why me? Why not all the other girls in class that were obviously fawning all over him?' I shake my head and open my car door, slumping down into it and take a deep breath before putting on my seatbelt and putting my keys in the ignition.

Hopefully I'll be able to get rid of this sour mood by the time I see Jungkook otherwise our lessons aren't gonna be the prettiest today and we don't have time for anything but pretty. Time is running out and I need to remain focused if I want to do this and do it right.

I want to leave a good impression on everyone for James' sake, but more than anything I want to make Jungkook proud of me...

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eatifa · 2 years ago

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do you remember? part three

a/n - hello! this is inspired by a tiktok edit and i used an author's quote for sanzu part.

this part is controversial so please read the trigger warnings and sanzu part is really dark and morbid.

part 1 - starring - mikey, koko and chifuyu

part 2 - starring - draken, baji, kazutora

concept - seeing her again, a person that they used to know.

starring - izana, ran and sanzu

trigger warning - gaslighting, cohesive relationship, gender inequality, abusive power stance

izana was toxic

it take a lot for izana to open up to someone. when it does happen, his feelings doesn't change but rather become more intense. the only difference is that a spark of paranoia get added to the hot boiling cauldron since his biggest fear is being abandon and being alone forever.

he doesn't know how to distinguish between the fine line of being protective compare to being offensive. as someone that never been raised with love and affection, izana could only see everything in tint of black and grey.

no matter how hard someone try to get izana to see things in a different way, the result would be temporarily, he would give it a go before reverting back to his old ways at the realisation of external factors.

izana rather be the flame than the one that get burnt. seeing the good in others is naive thinking, it's asking to be backstab by someone whose have ill intentions at the other person. afterall, you never know what someone is like at the end of the day.

this conversational mindset and negative thinking creates a knock on effect on his relationship with someone. he doesn't restrain her from doing what she want or the other small things like choosing the ideas for dates.

instead, izana plant seed of doubt inside the woman that she love. he see it as an act of precaution rather than being a harmful deed. it's not wrong if he doing it out of love.

"are you sure that you have been invited? maybe, it was just out of sympathy."

"it's been a long time since you have seen her, she must be closer with someone else by now."

"you should disable the read recipients, it's embarrassing to be left on read."

it would take a long time for her to catch on what he is doing. izana is too deceitful for others to tell whether his actions are genuine or not. the worst thing is of being his girlfriend, that she automatically give him the benefit of doubt the most.

izana is aware of this but he simply does not care.

izana know what he is doing but why would someone reflect on their actions or acknowledge the consequences if they don't feel guilt?

izana would never feel this no matter what happens. the only way out is rejecting him.

"fuck off, izana. get out of my way."

the ending of his longest relationship with a woman. it is time to say goodbye but izana still doesn't feel guilt or he see her as a victim.

izana is the one that put his utmost effort into the relationship, it's not his fault she suddenly switches on him.

the only thing that izana feel is heartbreak but his pride is too strong to beg anyone back. he rather be alone and forgotten than deal with being second choice.

when the mourning state finishes, izana keep it lowkey and forget about her but as more of his relationships face the same ending, the penny finally drops.

he is the problem.

it's a bitter pill to swallow but he needed to change before he inflict irreversible damage but it's a problem that izana need to face along. being alone never appeals to him but izana needed to do as a solo.

he stay single for a long time as the process start but he catches a glimpse of the first woman that he did it too. izana wasn't entirely sure whether it was a sign when seeing her in a restaurant, sitting at a table for two.

but if izana wanted to mend his ways, he needed to start with her first by apologising. as izana made his way towards her direction, someone else beat him to it.

another man, her date and izana couldn't help but feel a needle of jealously stabbed inside his veins.

but izana want to do the right thing since he no longer have the desire to revert back to his old ways. it is time to stop being a charade.

the victim blaming act card will just unravel his progress so izana decides to just sneak one glance at his first woman before turning his back against her and walking away.

some things are better left unsaid.

ran did it for the wrong reason.

ran knew it was a stupid idea to date the plain jane in high school solely because of a bet.

a light bet between him and his brother to see who could get the most reserve and quiet girl in their year goes on a date with them. the winning prize of the bet faded away in his mind since years had passed when the bet was formed.

ran was the winner.

it's backfired. the feeling started to develop. one date, two date and countless dates happened. a big commitment of moving in together when they reached their early twenties.

the whole relationship was formed on a lie from ran's side. he should had come clean after a few months in but as the time passed, the lies create more spiderwebs of deceit along with the love out weighting the guilt of scale.

the confession would either destroy the relationship or strengthen it. delaying the truth wasn't a sensible idea but the feelings had become too intervened where he was genuinely afraid his girlfriend would have a breakdown.

ran would just feel the loneliness but his biggest fear is that his girfriend would be traumatised too much to let anyone else in. it would be his own fault but the option of being there to let piece back together her broken heart wouldn't be available to him.

but when his girlfriend started dropping signs that she want him to propose. the moment had arrived to come clean before he completely fuck up her life forever.

"i need to tell you something."

"are you going to propose?"

he wanted to run himself over with a car or rot in a cell forever. it still wouldn't had been enough though.

she didn't believe him at first. the denial started to disappear when he rang rindou along with putting him on speaker to confirm the bet was the truth.

when the phone call ended, he was expecting tears or a slap to the face but the hollow look in her eyes made his heart drop. she didn't even make a sound, she just look numb.

she is in mute mode forever and it's all his fault.

ran couldn't stay though, it would be like adding oil to the fire so he left with conflicted feelings but he had already hurt his ex-girlfriend enough.

ran did secretly hope she would be brave enough to start anew.

so years later, when he was at a theme park with his brother, rindou pointed out a ghost from his past.

the girl that he broke her heart but seeing her with two children and a man standing next to her made him feel a bit relieved. she managed to move on and start her own family.

but ran never did, he couldn't help but feel a wave of regret washed over him when the relief died down.

he truly does still miss her.

she was never coming back though.

he wanted to be the father of her children.

but he only have himself to blame.

sanzu was forced

sanzu always believe that she was a wildcard but never imagined that she was a demon in disguise. if he knew that the encounter wouldn't had happened if he put his foot down and refused to be his friend's guest for a wedding, the start of a hellish predicament wouldn't had began.

but sanzu gave in and it was the biggest mistake of his life. he met her as one of the bridesmaid and he wasn't entirely sure why but she wouldn't leave him alone when he would goes to the buffet table.

he was sure if she didn't had to sit at that assigned table with the rest of the bridemaids, she would had stuck to him like glue throughout the whole wedding but her role was enough to do damage.

"can i have your number?"

the annoying woman asked out loud enough for the bride and groom to over heard them.

for fuck sake.

sanzu couldn't start a fight at a wedding that he wasn't even personally invited too. his friend would hate him forever and he didn't want to be a homewrecker for the newlyweds.

so sanzu grudingly typed him number in her phone.

"ring me, so i can save your one."

sanzu didn't want to say this but he could feel the gaze of the bride piercing him behind his back. but surely, a number could do no harm? he was wrong.

she had tried texting and ringing him but sanzu left her messages on read and let the calls goes straight to voicemail. but she still kept spamming her no matter what he would do.

in the morning where he decided that blocking her should fix everything, his friend knocked on the door and sanzu opened it without a second thought. another person was standing next to him.

it was her.

sanzu wanted to slam the door on them but that was too abrupt.

"i need to leave soon. come back another time."

he was hoping the excuse would be enough to scare them away.

"that's fine, we did popped in without any warn-"

"is it fine for me to use the bathroom?"

isanzu would told her to fuck off but he couldn't, his reputation was on the line. one thing lead to another and they ended up sitting at the table belonging in the kitchen where sanzu needed to act normal by giving them refreshments.

"so sanzu, tell me about yourself."

the start of his first conversation with the bitch.

after that, she sent him a message.

do you want to go out on a date?

sanzu just deleted it.

she disappeared for a month or so where sanzu believes that she finally got the message and deleted her number with a happy smile on his face.

but she doesn't deal with rejection well.

it started off subtle, receiving bad grades for the assignments of his master and receiving threats of retaking the year if there isn't an improvement.

sanzu did not understand why this was happening. no one jump from being the best in the class to the bottom. from that moment onwards, a domino affect started happening.

his dog went missing, his girlfriend dumped him, the rent suddenly jumped up out of nowhere that forced him to move out.

getting fire from his part time job was the last straw. this was no longer a coincidence and rewinding from the start must give a clue.

"are you implying that we graded your work wrong?"

sanzu gave up with asking the lecturers from getting that as his first answer. pissing them off would just be another problem that he couldn't deal with right now.

in the end, sanzu researched the university more in depth online.

the generous donors that help this educational institution.

one of the article that appears on the first page, sanzu was compelled to click on it. as the page load onto the screen, he scanned through the names till he stop at particular one.

sanzu zoomed in to get a proper close at the surname.

why did he recognise this one?

ding.

the paranoia started to get to sanzu when he heard the doorbell ringing straight away when he read the surname.

what was going on?

sanzu wanted to find out and running away wouldn't explain anything.

with a beating heart, he grabbed onto the handle and opened the door.

it was her, wearing a black checkered pinafore dress with a black ankle boots.

what the fuck is she do-

his face dropped. sanzu remember now. it was her surname, one of the first thing mentioned when she forced herself inside his home.

everything clicked into place but it must be a sick prank.

why would anyone be bothered enough to make his life a li-

"when I leave you will finally understand, why storms are named after people.”

sanzu wanted to believe that he misheard her statement but seeing her devilish smirk confirmed that his theory is correct and she know what she is doing.

"so listen to me, love."

sanzu wanted to wake up from this nightmare.

he was fuck.

eventually, she left sanzu for another person but he was never the same after that. his forced relationship with her was a living hell. sanzu genuinely doesn't knew how he was able to survive through that jail sentence.

one thing for sure, sanzu wasn't going to forget her name anytime soon and it would be a long time since he would trust another woman.

but time heals everything and the damage had fade away enough for him to start a relationship with another woman.

sanzu genuinely thought the pain was gone till she saw her again in a designer jewellery store. seeing a glimpse of her made him goes into panic mode that made him sprint in the opposite direction.

he just wanted to get far away from her as far as possible.

throughout the whole relationship, others would say she was nothing but sweet and sanzu would always wanted to add another word but he never could.

she's sweet but a psycho.

"when I leave you will finally understand, why storms are named after people.”

her threat popped inside his head again and she certainly lived up to those words but sanzu felt like turning around to tell her to fuck off.

but who would believe a man over a woman.

#tokyo revengers #tokyo rev x you #tokrev #tokrev x reader #sanzu haruchiyo #sanzu x reader #izana #izana x you #izana x reader #izana kurokawa #ran haitani #ran #ran x reader #ran haitani x reader #sanzu #angst

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saiilorstars · 1 year ago

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Ch. 29: Fragile Lines

Fandom: Harry Potter (Hogwarts years 1-7) Pairing: Draco x OFC

taglist:@ocappreciationtag @arrthurpendragon @anotherunreadblog @maaaaarveeeeel @stareyedplanet @foxesandmagic @kmc1989

Story Masterlist // Romina’s Masterlist

Fanfic • Ao3 • Wattpad

If you’d like to be a part of this OC’s work/edits, let me know!

The weeks after the big game, things dwindled down for the Slytherins. Gryffindor was over the moon with its win and naturally it took some weeks to come down from it. The fact that exams were coming help with that. Most of the time, the third years found themselves either in the common rooms or the library to study.

Romina and Hermione got together one afternoon to go over their notes for their shared classes. Everything seemed to be piling on each day and it only got worse when they had their schedules finally planned out.

The only reason Romina paused her studying was because she got a glimpse of what Hermione's schedule looked like. "Now wait a minute," Romina waved a hand in front of the brunette girl, "If this is right, how the heck are you taking two exams at the same time?"

Hermione's eyebrows raised with only slight interest in the question. She had a mounting pile of books on her side that she needed to get through. "I just am, don't worry about it," she answered in a fast pace tone. "Do you have the Muggle Studies study guide you made?"

"Yeah, but...Hermione, how are you doing all this?" It felt like an age old question at this point in the year. As much as Romina badgered Hermione about it, the latter never gave her a straightforward answer. "I mean, you're super smart but this is beyond you."

Hermione tapped her fingers along the table, her impatience marking her forehead with a crease. "Romina, the study guide, please?"

With a sigh, Romina handed the papers over to her. "Well, I guess good luck is in order. I'm a little worried over my potions' grade."

"Why? You're pretty good at them," Hermione said distractedly while she skimmed through the guide.

"Decent, I suppose," Romina shrugged. "But there's always an ingredient I forget." She hated to admit that Draco always helped her out in the class. As good as she thought she was at potions, he was exceedingly better at it.

"You'll get it, Romina, you always do." Hermione sounded like she was reciting more than having an actual conversation. Romina didn't blame her, she was too focused on the guide to concentrate on anything else.

She decided to leave a little early to give Hermione plenty of solo time for her studying. She grabbed her things and stuffed them into her book bag. "See you later," she told Hermione. She doubted that the brunette even heard her. She headed back for the common room to get a start on the Transfiguration studying.

"Oh hey Romina," she heard Pansy's drawling call in the hallway. She and Millicent were sitting together on a bench with a book between them.

"Hello and goodbye, Pansy," Romina said, making a beeline for the common room now.

"Wait! Don't you want to see the album we're looking at?"

Romina paused right in front of the steps. She looked back at Pansy with a deep scowl. "Now why the hell would I want to do that?"

"Because you're in it," Pansy said and Millicent giggled beside her.

"What?"

"Well, I guess it's not technically you but she looks a hell a lot like you," Pansy said, turning the album over for Romina to see.

Of course, being too far had Romina coming back to get a better look. Her heart nearly stopped at the sight of her mother's moving picture. "Where the hell did you get this from?"

"I have my ways," Pansy said all too proudly. "It's an old Hogwarts yearbook. Did you know that your mother was an outstanding student at getting into trouble?"

Romina bit the inside of her cheek. The picture she was lucky to see had her mother smirking maliciously at the camera. God, she hated the woman.

"And then your father…" Pansy started flipping through the pages to no doubt pull a photograph of Caplan too.

"Stop it!" Romina snatched the album altogether.

"Hey! Give that back!" Pansy was quick to jump off the couch.

"Why are you so hung up on my parents, Parkinson!?"

Pansy had a good laugh before she responded. "That's rich coming from you! Look at what you've done to your hair, for God's sake! And for what? Because you look like Mummy!" She snatched the album back and chucked it to Millicent. She ignored the gruff noise Milicent gave as she stalked up to Romina. "And guess what, Oswell? No matter what the hell you do to your hair, to your face, you will always look like your mother!" Pansy's voice started increasing in volume. "A death eater."

Romina swallowed hard as students began to stop in their tracks to witness the scene. All eyes were on her again.

"It doesn't matter where you go because everyone will always know who you are and what your parents happily did!" Pansy laughed. "And you really think adding some stupid highlights or cutting your hair is going to make that disappear?"

Romina stepped back from Pansy. She could feel her face burning with embarrassment and shame. Was she imagining the whispers or were those real? It felt like it was getting louder and louder...

Pansy was more than satisfied with the scene. She laughed triumphantly. "At this point, may I suggest Polyjuice for your troubles?"

Romina looked around and swore that the crowd was multiplying. Tears filled her eyes. Her hand came up to her hair to grip.

She dashed away before anyone said anything to her. She heard the gruff of the first years she pushed through but she didn't dare look back to apologize. By the time she reached the common room, she was in full fledged tears.

Arden, who was studying at one of the round tables, looked up to see Romina running inside. "Romina? What's the matter?"

Romina didn't answer. She didn't even look in Arden's direction as she ran into the hallways. Arden had no choice but to leave her things to chase after Romina.

Romina ran straight into their room, her head flipping in every direction as if she was searching for something. She went under her bed to pull out a box. Her hands ransacked it all until she found what she was looking for: a pair of scissors.

When Arden finally caught up with her in the room, Romina was already standing in front of Daphne's long view mirror getting a fistful of her hair to chop off. "WOAH!" Arden had never run and jumped over beds so fast. She only just made it in time to snatch the scissors from Romina, a dangerous act alone. "ARE YOU MAD!?"

"Give them back!" Romina exclaimed, hand stretched out to take the scissors.

Arden took a few wild steps back. "NO!"

Tears were streaming down Romina's face as she grew more desperate. "Arden, please! I need them!"

"For what!? To chop everything off again!?"

"YES!"

"Why!?"

"Because I look just like her! No matter what I do, I still look like Elora!" Romina finally burst into fresh tears. She turned back to the mirror and gripped her hair. "No matter what I do, it doesn't change anything! I'll always be their daughter! Pansy's right! Everyone will always know who I am and what my parents did!"

Parkinson. Arden knew the girl was behind all this. She took a heavy breath in before the wretched name slipped out of her with a curse. "Romina…"

The girl in question was a distraught mess. She had crumpled to the ground and buried her head over her knees.

Arden had never seen Romina in such a state. She hurried to leave the scissors in her own area, not wanting to leave them out in the open for Romina to use in another state of rampage. She then came back to Romina's side on the floor. "C'mon Romina, you can't let Parkinson get to you like this."

"It's not just her!" Romina sniffled. "Every time something bad happens in the school, especially if it has something to do with Sirius Black, everyone thinks I helped him somehow. Some people still think I'm the one who gave him the bloody passwords to get into the Gryffindors' tower!"

Arden looked away with pity. Yeah, she heard those rumors too and from people she never even thought would believe in that nonsense. "Okay, okay, things could be better but in order to be better, you have to get up."

"What's the point, Arden?" Romina shrugged her shoulders. "I'm an Oswell. No one's ever going to look past that."

"What are you talking about? People already have. Not everyone, yeah, but many of them. There's the Paes twins, Daphne, the Weasleys, Harry! Luna Lovegood never even cared! There's Rolf too! Hell, even Draco didn't care! There's so many of us who could give a crap about a last name. Don't let Parkinson get to you because that's exactly what she wants. She can't stand that you've bested her so many times. This is petty retribution for what you did to her during Potions!"

Romina knew that was true. She always knew that Pansy would get back at her eventually. It was just hard moving past it.

"Romina, you can't keep messing with your hair like this," Arden said. She made herself more comfortable on the ground beside Romina. "You are who you are, whether your hair is short or long or red or even pink but it does not mean that you're like your parents."

"I hear you, I do, but knowing what's happening with Black...it's messing me up even more! I wish they just caught him already."

"They will eventually," Arden said with no doubt in her mind. "Nobody escapes the Dementors."

"I don't know what to do right now, though," Romina said with a long sigh. The tears were slowing down which was a good sign at least. She swallowed hard and wiped away some of the tears on her cheeks. "Pansy just made a fool out of me again in front of everyone. They'll be talking about this for weeks—until the end of the year!"

"So what?" Arden challenged. "Who bloody cares if they're talking about you?"

"I do!"

"These people love gossip but once something new comes by, they're going to forget about you."

"That's all I want," Romina said. She just wanted to disappear in the dark corners where nobody paid her any attention.

"Please, let's study together," Arden said. "We'll figure out a way to get Parkinson back."

"No," Romina shook her head. "I don't...I don't want to keep this game going. I just want her to leave me alone now. I'm afraid of what she could do next time."

"Oh no, you are not going to be afraid of Parkinson!" Arden snorted. "There is nothing to be afraid of from that girl! And once you start feeling better, you'll see that too. Right now your head is all wonky from the tears. Give it a day or so."

Romina half-smiled. This wouldn't be the first time she had to come back from one of Pansy's tricks. "Okay, let's go study."

Arden beamed. "That's my best friend!" She threw her arms around Romina for a side hug. Eventually, she managed to pull a smile out of Romina too.

~ 0 ~

Transfiguration was up first in the long list of exams. Romina thought it was a fairly easy exam with the only slightly more difficult assignment being the last one where they had to turn a teapot into a tortoise. That could've gone a little better for some students. Charms was right after and it went pretty well too. Romina was most confident in her Care of Magical Creatures class both out of Rolf's helpful tips beforehand and the fact that Hagrid had given them all such an easy assignment.

Romina spent that entire week with her nose in her books. She had no desire to see nor talk to Pansy, much less if it was to get a glimpse of the triumphant smirk that had been glued to her face ever since the incident in the hallway. Romina didn't feel confident enough to uphold any type of conversation with her. By now, the entire House had learned what transpired and while some of them kept their comments to themselves, others were bold enough to side with Pansy (whether they knew her or not) or ask Romina questions about her parents. At times, Romina felt like throwing whatever book she had in her hands at the nosy students.

Muggle Studies was a breeze in the exams. Whatever Romina didn't know, she put faith in her common knowledge of the life she'd lived for the past 13 years. Herbology was only a pain because of the heat and Astronomy was, as usual, a mysterious delight. History of Magic, as boring as it was, wasn't very challenging either. The last exam she took was Potions and, surprisingly, Romina found herself constructing the assignment fairly well. She might have to admit to Draco that she owed him...maybe. She didn't want to risk inflating his ego.

It was Buckbeak's execution day that put a damper in Romina's mood. She met Harry, Hermione and Ron on that unfortunate afternoon to go down to talk to Hagrid.

Hermione was furious, to say the least. She stormed down the courtyard, leading the group towards the hills. "How can they do this? How can they be okay with killing Buckbeak like this? It wasn't his fault!"

"I'm sorry, I tried talking to Draco but he suddenly had no ears to listen with," Romina said with a roll of her eyes. He was the definition of selective hearing.

"We know you tried, Rom," Harry said with a comforting pat on her shoulder.

"We should just go see Hagrid," Ron said. There was really nothing else they could do at this point.

"Hey Romina!"

Romina, along with the trio, looked back to see Cedric Diggory coming towards them. "You got a moment?" he asked Romina. "It's about the Transfiguration tutoring you're doing for my friend Heidi?"

"Uh, yeah, yeah, of course." Romina leaned closer to the others to whisper for them to get a head start for Hagrid's hut. "I'll catch up soon, promise."

The trio nodded and left in a hasty stride. They literally had no time to waste.

"So, what do you need, Cedric?" Romina asked the older boy. "I didn't know Heidi was your friend. She's a bit on the, uh, younger side…" Heidi was a timid first year she was tutoring and now that Romina remembered, Heidi had mentioned in one of their sessions that she had made friends with a cute older boy in Hufflepuff.

Cedric smiled, and Romina thought it was absolutely charming. "She got lost in a hallway once and I sort of showed her around. She seemed very frightened."

"At Hogwarts as a first year? Oh yeah," Romina nodded. First year was a terrible year if anyone asked her.

"Anyways, after that, I sort of just check up on her every once in a while," Cedric said. "She's been a little nervous about her upcoming exam in Transfiguration and I've talked to her a bunch of times. I know she's gotten a lot better since you started tutoring her."

Romina smiled softly. "She's definitely improved. I think she can pass the exam no problem."

"I think so too," Cedric nodded, "But if you wouldn't mind, I don't know, talking to her before her exam tomorrow? I feel like she might listen to you more than me."

"Of course," Romina assured him. "I'll go talk to her tomorrow morning. Give her a pep talk, you know?"

"Thanks Romina, seriously. You're the best!"

Romina's lips pursed together in an awkward smile. "Really? You think so?"

Cedric guessed where her doubt was coming from. He had heard plenty of things about her over the year and even more recently. "Of course. What people say...it doesn't matter, honestly."

Romina's expression softened with his words. It shouldn't matter, she told herself. That's what Arden said, that's what Harry said, that's what everyone she cared about said. Maybe she should start to actually listen.

She thanked Cedric for his kind words and started for Hagrid's hut. Harry, Ron and Hermione were probably already in and so should she. She was so focused on getting to the hut as quickly as possible that she could've never expected to crash into someone just as soon as she stepped onto the sloping field.

"Argh! Watch it you — Oswell!"

Romina rubbed her forehead as she took a step back. "Please, Draco, don't sound so sorry about it."

"I'm not!" He didn't hesitate to clarify. He sounded extra cranky for some reason and when Romina finally dropped her hand from her forehead, she saw why.

Her eyes widened at the pool of blood under his nose. "What the hell happened to you?"

"It's your mudblood of a friend—Granger!"

"Hey! Watch it!" Romina pointed a finger at him. She looked past him to Crabbe and Goyle with the same warning eyes in case they had a thing to say about it. "Bet if Theodore or Blaise were here, you wouldn't have been so stupid."

Selective hearing was happening again because Draco didn't even acknowledge her words. "Look at what she did to me!? She broke my nose!"

"Well, what did you do?" Romina crossed her arms.

The amusing manner in which she asked and the fact that she had even asked in the first place infuriated Draco. "She broke my nose, Oswell!" He yelled incredulously. "I swear I'm going to get her back for this!"

Romina silently listened to him rage about the hell he would unleash on Hermione. She stepped closer to him but in his rage, he didn't notice.

"And if any of you three breathe a word about this to anyone, I'll—"

Romina's hands seized his nose and pushed it back into place. CRACK!

Draco's scream could've echoed through the school, and maybe it had. "What the hell!?" Romina blinked calmly under his murderous glare. "What did you—"

"I fixed your nose," she said flatly.

"What!?" His hands flew to his nose. "How did you know how to do that?"

"It is amazing what you learn in a muggle school's aftercare." A smile tugged at Romina's lips. "There really should be more supervision but then I guess I would've never learned how to do that." She pointed at his now healed nose. "Fair notice that it will be sore for the next couple of days."

"What? Just like that?"

Romina rolled her eyes and yanked his hands from his nose. "Let me see," she swatted his hands as he tried to touch his nose again.

"See what? I thought you 'fixed' it," he said with too much sarcasm in his tone.

Romina tutted. "Not the way to talk to someone who just did you a favor. Move your hands, dammit!"

With a huff, Draco did as told. Romina gently touched both sides of his nose. She pressed ever so lightly, like a feather's weight, and asked him if he felt any pain.

"Not really," he lied for some reason. He did feel the echoes of the sharp pain he first felt when Hermione's fist collided with his nose, but Romina was looking up at him with big dark eyes waiting to find out if her trick really helped him or not. She was very close to him and for the first time, he could smell a faint scent of...what, roses? It was nice. She still wore the headband he gave her. She never really took it off, did she? He tried ignoring the strange feeling in his stomach when he wondered if she really liked the headband that much to never let go of it.

A snap of Romina's fingers brought Draco out of his thoughts. The snap hadn't been for him but instead for Crabbe behind him.

"Napkin," Romina had instructed, or rather ordered, so swiftly. Taking command looked very good on her.

Crabbe and Goyle fumbled between each other to produce what she had asked for. In the end, they handed her a handkerchief that she crumpled into a ball to tuck underneath Draco's nose.

"Just wash your face," she told him with a small smile. "And I look forward to hearing what, oh what, you said to finally make Hermione snap."

It was easy for Draco to slip back into his usual self. He rolled his eyes and stepped away from her, though he did take hold of the balled up napkin under his nose. "I'm going to get her back," he warned her.

"No you're not because then I'll break your nose this time," she promptly said back. She flashed him a smile and moved around him.

"Where are you going, Oswell?" Draco turned after her. "It's almost dark."

"Don't worry about me so much," Romina put a hand over her chest. She laughed when he rolled his eyes. She then turned towards Hagrid's hut to catch up. She'd spent a little bit more time up here than she wanted to.

She sprinted down the field only to catch sight of Dumbledore, Fudge, and the damn executioner were already on their way inside the hut.

"Aw dammit!" She stomped her foot. She quickly looked around for her friends and caught a break when she saw the trio sneaking their way towards the forest. She scurried through the outskirts of the garden to sneak up on them from behind. "What's happened!?"

"What does it look like? They're here!" Ron exclaimed and was promptly shushed by Harry and Hermione.

"What took you so long?" Harry asked Romina as they made space for her between them.

"Umm...Cedric," Romina supplied the lie a bit slow on her part. "He, um, he was concerned about the girl that I tutor. Apparently, they're friends." She made a show of focusing entirely on the happenings in the hut ahead of them. She had a feeling that Harry would not like to know that she fixed Draco's broken nose that he no doubt deserved to have broken.

The group eventually had to sneak back up the field before the adults came out of the hut. They stopped right where they'd been earlier to look below. The executioner had already come through the pumpkin patch where Buckbeak awaited and with one swing of his ax, the job was done.

Hermione was in full-fledged tears. She turned to hug Ron but it was cut short with Ron's yelp. "Scabbers!"

Romina's eyes widened at the sight of the rat scurrying away from them. Ron went after the rat despite Hermione's and Harry's calls for him to stop.

"What—I thought it was dead!?" Romina exclaimed.

"Hagrid found him," Harry said before they took chase after Ron.

They shouldn't be chasing Ron and his rat when it was starting to grow dark out but here they were, coming to a stop a short distance from the Whomping Willow.

"Ron!" Harry exclaimed once they found the redhead on the ground picking up his rat.

"Oh—he's too close!" Romina pointed at the Whomping Willow that was coming to life. "Ron, run!"

At the sound of their voices, Ron looked up. Dread filled his face but not for the reason the group presumed. "No, you run!" He pointed at something behind them, forcing them to spin around and see what was there.

A jet black dog was coming for them, running, and leaped at them, or so they thought. It jumped clear of the trio to land on Ron instead. He screamed as it bit his ankle and dragged him towards the Whomping Willow.

"Oh my God!" Romina was frozen in her spot but thankfully Harry was not. He lurched forwards in an attempt to catch Ron before the dog took him away.

Hermione then jumped after Harry to create a chain and hold him too. "I've got you!"

Unfortunately, nobody had anybody. Romina saw her friends being dragged towards to the Whomping Willow like they were nothing but ragdolls. She ran forwards hoping to catch Ron instead of following the chain. The dog had already slipped through a gap in the tree and eventually, as much as Harry held onto Ron's hand, it took Ron with him.

"ROOON!" The remaining trio yelled after him.

"What do we do now!?" Romina could see nothing but darkness through the gap. They could still hear an echo of Ron's screams but it was fading.

And then Hermione screamed. The Whomping Willow had swept her up into the air and it came for both Romina and Harry next. They landed a good distance from the gap albeit in awkward angles. One by one, they rose from the ground and made a race for the gap again.

"Watch out!" Romina cried as one branch came plunging down on them. They had to jump in opposite directions. Romina and Hermione made it but Harry was smacked again and this time, his glasses went flying in the air.

Hermione attempted to jump over the branches swinging her way. She got the first one but the second one took her right with it. Romina felt like she was in a wicked game of double dutch, only this one was deadly. The endgame was the gap and one way or another, they had to make it through to catch up with Ron. She made a clean run for it, making jumps every now and then despite several branches making gashes over her shoulders and one terribly painful one against her cheek. Her hair was also not helping one bit. One branch managed to entangle itself with a part of her hair which then plucked her right up from the ground. Like Hermione, she screamed.

Only Harry remained on the ground and not by much. Already he had to avoid more branches, with absolutely terrible vision, and he could hear both of his friends screaming. He got a lucky break when he found his glasses on the ground and they weren't broken. As soon as he put them on, he saw Hermione coming in his direction.

She grabbed his shirt on her way and picked him up. Harry had no idea why this would be a good idea but now there he was hanging on for dear life. A short second later, however, he felt Hermione's hand push him off. Down he went into the gap and through the dark tunnel.

"JUMP!" Hermione then told Romina.

"I CAN'T!" Romina shook her head—part of her hair was still tangled in the branch. "It's too long! Go without me!"

"Fat chance!" Hermione managed to sneak her wand out of her pocket. She thanked the heavens the crazy spinning hadn't yet made it fly out. Now she just had to make sure she aimed right...on a moving...tree…

"Don't you dare!" Romina yelled at her as soon as she saw Hermione's wand making an aim towards her. "WE'RE MOVING!"

Yes, yes they were moving and they were very short on time so…

"Diffindo!" Hermione cried.

Romina felt the slicing of her hair and because of it, she let go of the branch. Her body went tumbling into the gap, coming to an unceremonious landing somewhere dark and cold.

"Rom!?" Harry was already up and no doubt waiting for them. "Are you—"

Romina groaned when Hermione's body landed right over her.

"Oh, sorry!" Hermione rolled off her.

"Hermione Granger..." Romina's voice shook as she pushed Hermione off of her then sat upright. "What did you do to me!?"

Harry produced a wisp of light with his wand, allowing him to see exactly what Romina was so upset about. His eyes widened. "Oh, Rom…"

Romina's hands flung to her hair which was now chopped in a very uneven manner with some tips far shorter than others. Hermione winced at the strangled cry Romina gave.

"Romina, you'll be okay! You can just fix it with a-a hairstylist or — Madame Pomfrey! She can help!"

"I can't fix this on my own! I look hideous!" Romina shouted. Up until today, she had only shortened and enlarged her hair's length and changed part of its color. She had no layers which made it even easier but now that was all gone.

"You guys, we need to find Ron," Harry said. It sounded inconsiderate on his part but he was thinking about how Ron was doing with some psycho dog and suddenly hair issues didn't seem as important. "Rom, you don't look that bad—"

Romina cried even harder knowing that was a full lie. "Parkinson is gonna have full ammunition against me now!"

Hermione rushed to Romina's side to try and calm her down. She apologized over and over, swearing that she would help fix the hair until it was beautiful and perfect again.

Harry felt stupid the way he stood there watching one of his best friends sob. He honestly thought there was something wrong beyond the superficial hair problems. Romina wasn't the kind of girl to fixate so much on her appearance. This entire year had been one whole mystery with Romina and Harry suspected that this was the final straw. This was more than an uneven haircut.

Harry moved in front of Romina and bent down. "Rom, you're obviously going through some things and I'll be here after this to talk but please," he touched her shoulder, "we gotta go find Ron. He could be in real danger."

Romina's tears stained her face. She felt an overwhelming urge to cry and cry and...cry. She was so tired of everything, having to change every little thing about her in hopes that she would look different.

"Romina, we'll change your hair back," Hermione kept reiterating. "I will not rest until your hair is what it was before, I promise."

New tears filled Romina's eyes. "I don't want my hair to be what it was..." Her voice was strained as she stifled another sob. "I'm...I just want to be normal again."

Hermione exchanged looks with Harry. They had a good idea about what she meant now.

"I just want to be me..." Romina continued, instinctively reaching for a strand of her hair. She caught one of the longer ones by luck. "With my hair."

"Well, Rom, you can do that," Harry said slowly. "You can be whatever you want to be."

"But then everyone will think that I look like my mum — Elora. I'm going to look like Elora, and I don't want that.I don't want the first thing that people think of when they see me to be Death Eaters and that I'm one of their spawns."

"Parkinson has nothing to be talking about, Romina," said Harry sternly, knowing that girl was a huge factor in Romina's abrupt appearance changes. "Her parents may not have been death eaters but they were big supporters. She's a malicious pureblood witch. You're nothing like them."

"Not even close," Hermione agreed with a firm nod.

"Romina, you gotta believe us," Harry said. "And you gotta help us find Ron, please."

Romina thought for a seconds until sense hit her. Ron's in danger! You can't be so selfish! She couldn't be that selfish. That would make her exactly like the people she wanted to be different from.

She started clearing the tears off her cheeks. "We need to find Ron." She pulled herself up from the ground, dusting herself off as best as she could.

Harry was relieved with her choice and scrambled up to his feet as well before she changed her mind. Hermione followed and together, the three set out to find Ron at the end of the tunnel.

~ 0 ~

To the trio's surprise, they reached the end of the passageway and they climbed up into the Shrieking Shack.

"Of course we'd end up here," Romina mumbled under her breath. The place was so infamous that even the ghosts didn't wander near it. Where else would they end up if not there?

Harry was focused on the visible paw prints on the dusty floor. They heard creaking from the second floor which could only mean Ron was upstairs. They hurried up the steps and once they were up, they noticed there was a clear stripe on the otherwise dusty floor. Somebody had been dragged up and over the floor towards the only room at the end of the hallway that had a lit light. The trio exchanged glances before they started for the door. All three of them had their wands at the ready when they burst into the room.

Ron sat on a ruddy bed looking scared for dear life, clutching his rat to his chest.

"Ron! You're okay!" Hermione dashed for him. Romina followed closely behind, her hand still gripping her wand.

Harry lingered as he scanned the room. "The dog—where's the—?"

"It's a trap!" Ron frantically shouted, startling the trio. "He's the dog! He's an Animagus!"

Harry followed the track of paw prints on the floor and, to his wonder, they turned into the shape of human feet. That led him to—

"Oh my god!" Romina yelled this time.

Sirius Black was standing in the shadows waiting for them. Even when he looked like he could crumble from how slim he was, his grimy appearance was a fright. Harry wasted no time in drawing his wand again. Hermione set herself in front of Ron's bed and Romina made a dash to position herself in front of Harry.

"If you want to kill Harry, you'll have to kill us, too!"

"ROM!" Harry was downright horrified with her actions. He tried shoving her out of the way but it turned out she was a long stronger than she looked.

As scared as she was—and she was—Romina narrowed her dark eyes into a deep hateful glare on the man ahead of them. This was the man who had worked with her parents to kill Harry's parents. If he thought that she would be just like Elora and Caplan, he had another thing coming.

"No. Only one will die tonight," Sirius said, pointing a finger ahead of him.

"Then it'll be you!" Harry finally got a grip on Romina and pushed her to the side and ran straight for Sirius.

"Harry, no!" Hermione yelled as he lunged on Sirius.

Sirius laughed as Harry wrapped his hands around his neck. "Going to kill me, Harry?"

Harry didn't even hesitate to say a sharp 'yes!'.

"Harry, stop!" Romina came to pull him off the man before he attacked them. "Harry!" She pulled her friend back with him then drew her wand at Sirius again. "We don't kill him, but we can certainly turn him in—"

Suddenly, Lupin burst into the room and disarmed both Romina and Harry. With a nod of his head, he prompted the two to step back to where Hermione and Ron were. It was a wonder what would happen next. Too many questions were running through the students' heads.

Lupin pointed his wand at Sirius on the ground. "Looking a bit ragged, aren't we, Sirius? Finally the skin reflects the madness within!"

"You'd know all about the madness within, wouldn't you, Remus?" Sirius answered much too casually for the situation. A moment later, Lupin was helping him off the ground and they were hugging.

"No!" Hermione voiced everyone else's thoughts. "I trusted you! And all this time you've been his friend!" She looked at the others when she explained what she had to keep a secret for months. "He's a werewolf! That's why he's been missing classes!"

Romina was stunned. Harry and Ron were dumbfounded. How could they have missed that? If they'd paid more attention, the signs had all been there...

Lupin didn't seem very distraught that his secret was out. He regarded Hermione with bemusement. "How long have you known?"

"Since Professor Snape set the essay."

"My, my, you really are the brightest witch of your age I've ever met, Hermione."

Sirius blew a raspberry. "Yes, you glow like the sun. And you howl at the moon. Enough talk! He dies!"

"Wait, Sirius!"

"I did my waiting!" Sirius frantically yelled. "Twelve years of it! In Azkaban!"

"Very well," Lupin gave in.

"No!" Harry brandished Hermione's wand at the pair. "You betrayed my parents! You sold them to Voldemort!"

"It's a lie!"

"No, you did," Romina spoke much calmer than Harry but that was only because a lump in her throat was threatening to spill tears. "You worked with my parents and then together you all sold the Potters out. Everyone knows the bloody story!"

Sirius now regarded her with some interest but Lupin cut in before he ever said anything. "Romina, it's been a lie. Someone did betray Harry's parents. Someone in this room right now. Someone who, until quite recently, I believed to be dead."

"What're you talking about?" Harry demanded. Romina was too dumbfounded to speak. "There's nobody here."

"Peter Pettigrew! He's in this room! Right now!" Sirius exclaimed. "Come out, come out, Peter! Come out, come out and play!"

The door burst open again and this time Snape came in. "Expelliarmus!" Everyone's wands flew out of their hands. "Vengeance is sweet. How I hoped I'd be the one to catch you."

Lupin raised a hand towards him. "Severus—"

"I told Dumbledore you were helping your old friend into the castle. And here's the proof!

"Brilliant, Snape." Sirius rolled his eyes. "Once again you've put your keen penetrating mind to the task and as usual come to the wrong conclusion. Now, if you'll excuse us, Remus and I have some unfinished business... to attend to."

Snape pointed his wand at him, closely to his jaw. "Give me a reason. I beg you." Sirius had no choice but to back away.

"Severus, don't be a fool, Severus!"

"He can't help it. It's habit by now," Sirius said with a hint of a smirk.

"Sirius, be quiet!"

"Be quiet yourself Remus!"

The students all looked between the teachers bickering until Snape cut in. "Listen to you two. Quarreling like an old married couple."

"Oh, why don't you run along and play with your chemistry set!" Sirius waved him off.

"I could do it, you know. But why deny the dementors? They're so longing to see you." Snape grew closer to Sirius, his wand at the ready again. "Do I detect a flicker of fear? A Dementor's Kiss. One can only imagine what that must be like. It's said to be nearly unbearable to witness, but I'll do my best."

"Severs, please!" Lupin tried once again.

"After you!" Snape made a gesture for them to start walking. He wasn't going to let them get away. The pair had no choice but to start walking.

Harry took his opportunity to grab the last wand still with its owner.

"Hey!" Ron said when Harry pulled his wand from his pocket. Whatever else was about to come out of his mouth was forgotten when Snape went flying in the air against the wall.

"Harry!" Romina clapped a hand over her mouth. "You attacked a teacher!" And Snape of all of them!

Harry had the decency to look shocked himself. He got over it quick, though and pointed the wand at Sirius. "Tell me about Peter!"

"He was at school with us. We thought he was our friend!" Lupin explained.

"No! No. Pettigrew's dead. You" — Harry pointed with the wand at Sirius — "killed him!"

"No, he didn't," Lupin argued quite certainly. "I thought so too, until you mentioned seeing Pettigrew on the map!"

"The map was lying, then!"

"The map never lies!" snapped Sirius, also very certain of it.

Romina lifted an eyebrow at him for it. "How would you know that?"

"We made it!"

Romina was once again stunned. "No way…"

"Yes," Lupin confirmed.

"Pettigrew's alive! And he's right there!" Sirius pointed over to Ron who, by now, was tired of being at the other end of his slim finger.

"He's mental!

"No, not you! Your rat!"

Ron stood by his previous statement. "Scabbers has been in my family for…"

"Twelve years? Curiously long life for a common garden rat! He's missing a toe, isn't he?"

Hermione's eyebrows raised when the piece fit. She looked over to Ron almost apologetically.

"So what?" Ron shrugged.

"All they could find of Pettigrew was his…" Harry trailed off. The pieces were beginning to fall into place.

"Finger!" Sirius finished. "That dirty coward cut it off so everyone would think he was dead! And then he transformed into a rat!"

"So he's an Animagus too?" Romina pointed at the rat. Ron was utterly offended that she was believing the nonsense so easily. "Wouldn't-wouldn't that be on the registry. Hermione, you said—"

"Not if he wasn't registered," Hermione whispered. Romina had declared her crazy months ago when Hermione confided in her that she'd gone above and beyond for their Transfiguration class by looking up the Animagus registry to see what wizards and witches were registered on it.

Romina's eyes widened. She turned completely over to Ron, her hand pointing at the rat he so desperately held. "Oh! If he's been pulling that trick-Ron! He knows the truth!"

Ron shook his head and held the rat closer to his chest.

"The Oswell girl is right," Sirius said. "He knows the truth. He framed me! I would never betray my best friends like that!"

"Show me," Harry demanded. "Ron, give them the rat."

Lupin walked forwards to retrieve Scabbers and as much as Ron would've liked to fight for the creature, he let go simply to find out whether or not he and his entire family had played hosts to a murderer for the past 12 years. Lupin backed up with Scabbers in his hand. He set him down to cast the spell but that's when the rat took its chance to run.

Romina thought that was truth enough to what they'd been saying. What rat would run so desperately if it wasn't a human being in hiding? Eventually, Lupin managed to strike the rat with the spell and suddenly, Scabbers was no longer a rat but instead a big man with grubby little rat hands.

"Remus? Sirius?" He turned towards the two men. "My old friends!" His eyes then flickered to the students, precisely on Harry. "Harry! Look at you! You look so much like your father!"

Harry took a step back when the man came running up to him. Romina, with a crinkled nose, took a few long steps to the side.

"Like James! We were the best of friends—"

"How dare you speak to Harry!? How dare you talk about James in front of him!" Sirius bellowed and went after Peter. The shorter man ran to the first piece of furniture that would give him some safety for the moment.

"You sold James and Lily to Voldemort, didn't you?' Lupin demanded to know. Behind him, Harry wanted to know the same thing.

"I didn't mean to!" Peter said with a voice that sounded ready to crack. "The Dark Lord. You have no idea the weapons he possesses! Ask yourself, Sirius! What would you have done? What would you have done?"

"I would have died!" Sirius continued to roar. "I would have died, rather than betray my friends!"

Peter whimpered like an actual child. He dashed towards Ron on the bed. "Ron! Haven't I been a good friend? A good pet? You won't let them kill me, will you? I was your rat…"

Ron drew away from him as much as he could. He was downright disgusted.

Peter, desperately, turned for Hermione. He grabbed her by the shoulders and she quickly tried prying him off her. "Sweet girl. Clever girl. Surely you won't let them…"

"Let her go!" Romina yelled at him. He took one look at her and, possibly more frightened, stepped away from Hermione but only to then make an attempt on Harry.

"Harry, James wouldn't have wanted me killed!" Peter made a turn for Harry. He managed to slip from Lupin and Sirius for the moment. "Your dad... Your dad would have spared me! He would show me mercy!"

"You should've realized, Peter, that if Voldemort didn't kill you, then we would!" Lupin said, upholding his wand again. "Together!" Sirius was more than ready as well.

"No!" Harry suddenly shouted, startling everyone in the room.

"Harry, this man…"

"I know what he is. But we'll take him to the castle."

Relief flooded Peter's face. "Bless you, boy! Bless you!" He attempted to hug the boy but Harry shoved him off.

"Get off! I said we'd take you to the castle. After that, the dementors can have you.

Whatever relief had been on his face vanished the moment the realization sunk in.

~ 0 ~

Sirius and Harry each held one of Ron's arms to help him out of the passageway. Behind them were Romina and Hermione (who had miraculously known a sleepwalking spell to bring back Snape with them as well) and lastly Lupin was right behind a whimpering Peter.

Romina had been unusually quiet all the way and that was only because she didn't want to risk causing any rocks to fall on them. As soon as she saw the opening, she prepared herself. When they were out on the field again, they set Ron down to rest for a second. Harry couldn't help but wander to Sirius who put some distance between him and the group. Romina then saw her opportunity.

"Romina?" Hermione glanced at her when she noticed Romina standing up.

Romina ignored her and walked up to Peter. "Do you know me?" she asked the man, or rather demanded.

"Romina, I don't think this is the time," Lupin told her. He was still holding his wand at Peter because he had no doubt the man would make a run for it at the first chance he got.

"No, everyone got their go, it's my turn now," Romina said darkly, eyes glued to the prattling Peter. "Do you know who I am?"

"Of c-course," Peter answered in his shaky voice. "You're the Oswell girl. Their child."

"You worked with my parents," Romina said, briefly casting a glance in Sirius' direction. "It had to have been you if not...not Black. You worked with them! One-on-one, I'm sure!"

"I had to!" wailed Peter. "Your parents — they're wicked! You don't know them! They would've killed me if I didn't work with them!"

Romina swallowed hard. She abhorred the fact she agreed with someone like Peter. All she had were stories about those two and this was the first person who showed the true fear that Elora and Caplan Oswell instilled in their victims.

"They wanted the location of James and Lily. They were going to do things to me if I didn't give them what they wanted!"

Romina drew in a shaky breath. "They would have killed you for sure," she whispered. She almost, almost, apologized to Peter on behalf of her parents.

"You'll be just like them if you let them turn me over like it was my fault!"

Romina's eyes widened and pretty quickly formed a killer glare on the man. Her hand gripped her wand even tighter and she jabbed it against Peter's chest, eliciting a whimper from the rat-man. "What did you say to me?"

"Romina, step back," Lupin ordered. "Now!"

But Romina did the exact opposite. She got closer to Peter; her glare deepening on her face. "You're the criminal in this story! I know who my — I know who Elora and Caplan are and what they did but anyone brave enough would've done what was right and be loyal to their friends. I have no doubt that Elora and Caplan would've killed you whether or not you gave them the location. I know what they're capable of because I've heard all the stories, but me helping set the record straight and sending you to Azkaban doesn't make me like them. It'll set me apart from them." Her voice gained a roughness that she didn't even know she was capable of. "Rot in Azkaban next to them for all I care and tell them that I'm going to be fucking amazing without them." She twisted her wand against Peter's chest and watched him writhe in pain until Hermione pulled her back.

"Romina, stop—!"

Romina ripped her arm out of Hermione's grip and turned away, leaving a very startled Hermione behind her. Hermione gulped and looked back at the others who seemed just as concerned as she was.

Romina was practically shaking with anger and yet, at the same time, she could also say she was in despair. Everything about her parents was true, and here was the living proof. They happily turned one friend against his other friends and allowed for the framing of an innocent man. And this was just one of their pettier crimes. She wanted nothing to do with them; she didn't want to call them her parents anymore; she wished with all her heart that she could change her last name. Romina could feel the heated tears threatening to escape from her eyes. She wanted to be done with those two.

"Harry!" Hermione's sudden frantic cry made Romina's eyes snap open. She turned as Harry and Sirius did the same to see Hermione pointing at Lupin.

The full moon had risen.

Sirius was quick to reach his friend. "Remus, my old friend! Have you taken your potion tonight?" He had to hold onto Lupin because the man was getting ready to change into his wolf side, but it appeared like he was trying to fight it. "You know the man you truly are, Remus! This heart is where you truly live! This heart here! This flesh is only flesh!"

"No!" Harry saw Peter take hold of Lupin's wand. "Expelliarmus!"

The wand was out of Peter's grip but it was too late, he transformed back into a rat.

"NO! NO!" Romina would've chased after the rat had Hermione not grabbed her arm to yank her back. Lupin was already halfway to becoming a wolf.

"Run, all of you!" Sirius told them. His efforts to qualm Lupin's turn was done in vain. With one shove, Sirius toppled over the ground. Lupin finished the rest of his transformation to become a full werewolf.

"P-professor?" Hermione called him. For the moment, the wolf was still. Only his jagged breathing made a noise in the air.

"Nice doggy, nice doggy," Ron whimpered.

"Oh, that's not going to work!" Romina scolded the pair of them. "He's not...he's not...him anymore." And sure enough, the wolf started growling at them, inching closer to them.

"There you are, Potter!" Snape had finally come out of his spell and unknowingly blocked the group from the wolf. Of course as soon as the wolf growled loudly, Snape whirled around and saw what they were dealing with. His arms opened to cover the students.

The werewolf pounced on them but before it reached any of them, Sirius, in his animagus form, cut him off. They fought each other but in the end, the wolf was too strong. It threw the dog way over the field and dashed after to keep the fighting going.

"No, Sirius!" Harry slipped from Snape's shield to go after them.

"Come back here, Potter!" Snape yelled after them. Hermione and Romina attempted to do the same but he caught them both by their arms. "Don't even think about it!"

"But Harry!" Romina was frantically gesturing after their friend. He was in the dark forest chasing after two creatures with absolutely no back up.

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professor-abeloved · 2 years ago

Text

It Loves Within (a review of goodbyes, gratitude, and gay screaming)

i read somewhere that an aspect of the horror genre is pain. and if you're a fan of the it lives anthology, pain is inevitable.

the pain of choosing who has to take jane's place, a game that (doesn't) end(s) in sacrifice, betrayal, and anguish. the pain of losing one's parents, finding family anew (in both blood and found) - only to potentially lose it all.

the pain of an impossible choice: do you end this, once and for all, to save everyone - only to never see them again when you finally return home? do you remain in this world, with gaping wounds patched by temporary bandages, for the life you've never thought you had the chance to live? or do you try try try to bridge it all together, pushing for a world full of potential, a reality still out of reach, but still worth fighting for all the same?

every ending of It Lives Within is tragic in its own way, a bittersweet balm to the trauma-filled fuckaganza of a journey of these characters we know and love.

i'm never going to stop saying thank you to everyone at the @itlivesproject team for making the choice to create and collaborate on this masterpiece. the pain of pixelberry cancelling sequels (er, trilogies) broke my heart, but this fan game is more than a dream come true.

(the rest of this is kind of a rambling review under the cut)

looking back, i'm actually glad that they cancelled it - because i wouldn't trade every second i played ILW for anything. (and my girlfriend knows i've spent numerous all-nighters just playing and/or talking about ILW <3. i tell my therapist it started with abel's first diamond scene--and okay getting side-tracked).

first off, i want to mention all the variants. the It Lives series were unique and notorious for having different branches and endings that carried through to the next book, something which isn't very common in mobile visual novels. since ILW had not one, but two books to reference... hoo boy. coding, writing, making art + sprites for, testing, editing, and hell even just thinking of the different variables and how they impact a third book is such a herculean feat and i applaud everyone on the team for all the blood, sweat, and tears poured into this endeavor.

the gameplay itself was super fun!! i think it hit the right balance of action with timed choices and puzzles (i now want my own crown paperweight), implementing that Nerve Score system that the It Lives series is known for. not only did one have to keep in mind their Nerve, but also their choices between Blood and Shadow that would seal the fate of everyone in this Pixelberry Cinematic Universe (hello, horror Julian HSSgame). it was fun as fuck, i really liked and appreciate the decision of 3 different main endings <3

because the plot was a downright banger. every twist and turn had me on the edge of my seat and frantically screenshotting everything (somehow i've gotten to 20k screenshots, but at least 98% is ILW. the other 2% are random crap and also Choices, lol). it was cool to theorize and guess correctly on some things and still be utterly shocked at the brilliant execution. i can't list every single thing that made me gasp, but the crumbs of foreshadowing are incredible. not just saying this as a tester, but the replay value is nuts. (also the different personalites of sarcastic, genuine, and aggressive are so good).

having character relationships as a core stat was also an organic, lovely choice. i adore how everyone started off at various points (joss at 0 and amalia at 75 iirc?) and could develop differently and sometimes independently of nerve (abel being easy to befriend but having tough nerve to raise because he's going through Some Shit, while jocelyn was more closed off yet had easier nerve to raise). it really colors the ways the main 4 interact with rowan, and i love how even the romance variants played a part in it. from jealousy-laden glances to the famed Union Walk Out, this game was a breath of fresh air to the usual 'i accidentally have 1 flirt point with this LI and somehow they're in love with me' vibe of current mobile VNs. (mattyass is an outlier and doesn't count <3)

speaking of characters!! holy shit they slayed and served, giving closure to our favs from the first book and then some (being pro connor green wasn't in my 2023 bingo card, but it happened! i like that funky lil dude), giving the cast of the second book vital yet natural roles, while letting the new cast shine in their own right.

the It Lives cast is vastly beloved for a reason, and the ILP Team not only nailed every single one of the canon characters, but they breathed new life into them (literally in the case of RF!noah/devon). i'm beyond words to express how amazing it was to not only have my blorbos back, but to be able to see a beautiful devonoah romance and flirt with dan pierce after years of pining and get married to andy kang?!?! the gift just keeps on giving. (i'm just biased in mentioning them because devon, noah, andy, and dan are my ILITW biasline but i'm so happy to have seen stacy, lucas, ava, lily again <3333)

i also adore the ILB crew to bits!! i had the impression they were barely gonna be featured (and valid), but the way the showed up!! the way harper was important and could kick ass while injured??? slay.

and the way everyone interacted in ch19 was some avengers assemble beautiful dream. i don't think i'll ever be that happy again in my life, fr <33

and onto the stars of the show...

it's been an honor to spend time with each and every one of the main crew. jocelyn was someone i was hyped to see, ever since her cameo in the ILB end credits scene. redemption arcs are tricky and while i admittedly felt the initial trepidation... the execution of her development blew me away. it is fantastic and realistic (getting to encourage her to be better or to leave her alone was also a cool mechanic. i love how it's in firm yet empathic encouragement that she works to better herself.). she grew into such a fierce, gruff protector with a heart of gold and fists of fury. i love her so much. her nightmare sequence facing her shadow past self is one of my favorite's. arcs of self-forgiveness vs self-flagellation hit hard, and it moves me to tears to see how far joss has come <33 her route having either a slow burn vibe or a fwb tinge was also an excellent choice !! i enjoyed fwb route (she's so sweet and considerate, putting a blanket over us with a frown lmao) and i can't want to replay for sb + to write fics with her <3

now onto lincoln, my fav mlm cowboy son. i was initially jealous because i thought my girlfriend would be into him + i thought abel and he were exes, but i came around in ch13, iirc. i connect with his arc of wanting to prove your worth to your parents very painfully, and it means a lot to see him know that others' approval will never define him. i'm also happy to see him process his pain and give others a chance - give himself a chance to apologize and let abel in again. he's also fun to torture write for in fics, and somehow he's soulmates with my most complex ILW MC, wan, despite me son-zoning him real bad, so that's just amazing characterization. excited to write more <3

amalia my beloved <33 the brains, brawn, beauty of rowan's rogue monster hunting operations. i love her and her route so much. childhood best friends to lovers always slaps (i mean, cmon thats most of the ILITW ships), and the way it was executed for amalia is chef's kiss. the angst of your best friend not being the person you thought they were was an excellent spin on the trope. but the love she has for you and the love you have for her is something all on your own?? perfection <33 also her dreams of wanting to make a difference, especially what happened with her family is a very relevant experience today, are so inspiring <3 i'm so excited to replay her route with a different mc and also to write her as well <3

AIJDBFHDFJDOK abel aifhsohifOSDHDSIGH okay that's it.

JK abel, my love, my light, my stars. professor dorklord. the reason i've changed my url after these long years. i love him and his sexy sweater vest of sin so much. my favorite scene of all time is when pretending to have a lover's spat with abel in amalia's university AISHFIOG. he's funny, sweet, and charming. i'd listen to his nerdy rambles all night long - and yes, partially an innuendo, and partially that i like nerds who ramble about things. i love how he can be too rational (yet always with a heart <3) yet also so selfless, and i love how he can choose himself and his happiness at the end instead of living with ghosts <3 i love you abel, baby, i'm coming back for youuu in every route, in every wip <3

to ro, my trans-coded, queer-coded power entity <3 i was so happy that MC had powers (not from a suit we had to spend diamonds on), and wow they executed this trope so well. rowan is so well written with 3 different personality types, it's wonderful. y'know, i used to make MCs for every choices book (until i got lazy lol) and i can't believe i have at least 4 MCs again <3 the creativity this game sparks in me i swear to the power. i'll see you soon: ronaldo, genuinely sweet and genuinely terrifying baby boy. wan, my sweet snarky selfless drag queen. amor, you tough dorky tcg-playing sweetheart. reg my flirty failgirl (gender neutral), beanie baby charmer.

shoutout to daddy mattyass for being the GOAT choices antagonist/secret LI. you know i have so much to say about him, but it's almost 2 am and also 90% of my ilw meta is about him anyways <3 love to hate him, hate to love him!! he lives rent free in my mind <33 (but fr, such a compelling character and no one else would've been as satisfying to deal with in the finale. i miss the king of delusion pathetic meow meow <3)

also loving luis, sunny, elena, jessica, milf mayor green, babygirl adrian kim, girlboss marianthe. every npc, every pixel and line of code and text and just everything, every thread that makes up the tapestry of this beautiful, priceless experience.

it lives on, it loves on.

pain is inevitable. it hurts because it's over, it hurts because i love this game with every fibre of my being... but love doesn't really die, does it? it lives on in a different form. the game will always be there. if anything, the fandom is alive with the love that's put into the project, the love that reaches us no matter where we are - even from the fictional town of Westchester to the Power dimension and beyond.

#it lives within #ilw #it lives anthology #ilw finale #ilw spoilers #it lives within spoilers #el.txt #A REALLY LONG RAMBLY REVIEW AND PROCESSING OF MY FEELINGS AND ALSO THANK YOU TO EVERYONE #took me a while because so much is happening but trust me ive been crying about ilw every day since the finale #there's still so much more to say but also i am so sleepy #if you've read all this i love you

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