#hell even if i'm mad at someone i'll end up feeling guilty over being so upset

[ilkkawhat]

turns out i'm incapable of making a mistake and coping with it like a mature adult

[kogetaikid]

TW! UTY pacifist Spoilers!!!

Before people think I’m turning into a reblog account, here’s some of my misinterpretations of UTY pacifist before completing the game (there’s only two but Vera with me

1. Ceroba wanted to inject Kanako with INTEGRITY.

(Drawing unrelated, but you’ll know why I put it later)

When playing the pacifist, I thought the Ceroba misunderstood Chujin’s final message before he died, and convinced Kanako to get injected. However, during the Ceroba fight, in one of her memories, we see this:

(Cutting through some emotional dialogue)

Through some of the dialogue I skipped (wasn't originally planning on making a post about this), Kanako offers herself as a subject for her father's (Chujin's) work. Ceroba shows hesitation as it goes against her husband's wish but goes with it so she doesn't ruin his legacy. It made me feel bad for both characters. Kanako was just some dumb kid who didn't know what the hell she was asking for/expecting. She was just grieving her dying father and felt it was her fault for his demise. Ceroba was grieving too, and therefore couldn't think straight, but made the awful decision of giving into her daughter's demand of being injected with INTEGRITY.

2. Clovercide (TW!!!)

(Image also unrelated)

(TL;DR: Due to traumatic reasons, what was just a just sacrifice from Clover seemed like suicide to me.)

Just a heads up! I'll put a "keep reading" (if you wanna well, keep reading) under this because this may get a little personal...

This is still okay to reblog as long as you put the right warnings!

When I first saw the game in general, I though the screenshots I saw of the pacifist ending were the neutral ending. I though Clover got badly injured, or fell ill causing their end.

When I found out the wasn't the case, and watched a short clip (with no other context) of Clover giving up their life in the pacifist, I thought nothing of it. It was when I was listening to the soundtracks and saw how badly everyone was grieving Clover, then going back to places like tumblr talking about how they were just a kid that I started to get the wrong message.

I started to think Clover was probably miserable and indirectly asked for an assisted suicide by Ceroba and it broke me. Especially as someone who was suicidal/had dark thoughts as a kid. (I haven't felt like ending my own life for four years and have been clean for over one year) I've also had to endure the sob stories of mentally unstable people. This all tying back to the very few things I new about the pacifist ending, I felt kinda bad, sad and a little angry at Clover. This is what I would think:

WHY DID THEY DO THIS!!!???

SOME OTHER FUCKING DUMBASS KID COULD'VE TAKEN THEIR PLACE BUT NO!!! IT JUST HAD TO BE YOU, DIDN'T IT CLOVER!!!???

How miserable are you...?

Waiting for that fateful day where I could finally complete the game felt like preparing for a flu shot. I almost didn't want the game to end. I was so mad at the people saying "It was just a sacrifice", and shit.

...and as it turned out, they were kinda right. (still not giving them full credit) I didn't get the best screen shots cuz my computer crashed, but it was Clover going through all their memories in the underground, and realizing that they can't just hide away in the underground forever as a human. Monsters have been trapped for centuries and no matter how many of the monsters cared for them, they needed to do what was would've possibly happened from the start: give up their soul.

What I then got from the ending was that Clover felt to guilty to stay alive, and in the end, the wanted to do what's right. It's kinda getting sad again now that i think about it. Any who, this concludes my post. Enjoy the random screenshots at the bottom that I could fit into the post without it proving my point /hj. I'm currently debating whether or not I wanna go back and do the genocide route. Even though it's a fangame, I don't wanna fuck up the timeline.

[softue]

I'm not enough

TLDR; I don't feel like I'm enough for you, I hate myself and how much of a lazy piece of shit I am. You could do better even though I want to try and be better for you. I'm not enough for you, not in a like, you need more. I'm just not good enough, and it's not your fault. It's mine, I'm a bum who sits around with the hopes of the fucking world but once it's time to act I crumble under the pressure. I get in my head and over think, ruining my chances at a happy life. You deserve better and no matter how much I tell myself "I'll be better" or "I'll get this done, I'll do it for them" I just don't believe it. I'm a quitter, all my life it's all I've done. I quit school and cooked my brain, I quit my friends and let them go, I quit my health and let it slip. All my life I said it's whatever, giving up on it like the bum I am. You could do better, that's why I get so worried about you figuring that out. I don't have much to offer, most shit will rot away with me. I don't deserve you, I never have and I know it. You know it, you know you could do better. I wonder why you keep me around, the real reason. You might like my attention or the option. It's not my looks, figured that out a while ago. I don't really bring anything, just entertainment and a pastime. All I'm good for, if I'm being honest. To Be honest, I didn't accidently burn myself on a stove. Sorry I lied, I was going to tell you but I don't need you worrying about me or having that mental ideal about me. Honestly I hate myself, I hate my skin, I hate my hair, I hate my eyes. God my fucking eyes, I hate the way they rest, makes me look tried/weak. I hate everything, and it's my fault. Most of it? I can't control being black, but I can control my weight and hair health. I let myself go, it's my fault. Most things are, cause I'm a quitter.

I'm going nowhere, fuck the idea of 100T or streaming. I'm shit at val, worst of the worst. I can't maintain a streaming schedule cause I'm so fucking lazy. Every life schedule I try to make ends up failing me, well not failing me, I fail it. I fail everything, hell right now I'm supposed to be doing my chem shit. Finishing it off, but sometimes I wonder what the point of it is. I try to find hope and reason to live but every time I do it gets stripped from me. I hate my brain and I'd rather paint it on a wall then live with it in my skull. Don't worry though, I'm too pussy to kill myself, I think. I'm a fucking mess, and empty shell of a human. Sometimes I wonder if I treat you like my mom, like when you say "I'm not your mother". I have to take a step back and think, because I don't want you to feel that way. I don't need one, and I'm not looking. I just want someone to love me, yk? It's odd, I have this hole in my chest, this void that needs to be filled. I think it's love? I've tried everything else. Sex made me feel worse. Ignoring it made me want to die even more than I am. God made me feel guilty, still does. Idk man, life's weird. I don't really know how to put it. I'm scared to say it the wrong or right way because I don't want to lose you. That's why I mostly keep my mouth shut, so you don't get mad at me or have to correct me. Makes life easier. You make me want to try though, in life and shit. Which is new, most of the time I get that feeling of contentment. With you I don't, I know I HAVE to be better for you. There isn't a choice, you should have the world, you deserve the world. I want to do my best to give that too you. I just struggle, ig? It's less of a struggle and more of a wave. I wake up with a fire under me and then it slowly dies over a day or two. I get the willpower to live and then lose it. I get how cringe this might sound or how long it's getting. You don't have to read it. I never really write them for you to read them, just to imagine myself having a convo with you and help me clear my clouded mind. I wouldn't post them but it's the chance you read them that gives me that mindset? Like a gamble, idk man. All I know is I want to be the one for you, and I'm still going to try(?) and do my best. Even though my best isn't enough. 

It's not you that makes me feel like I'm not enough, well. Entirely? It's not your fault, its my brain overthinking and shit. Sometimes I feel like you bless me with chances and I keep fumbling them. Over and over. We keep getting into these "ruts" but btw I don't know what to call them. It's happening over and over, almost weekly. Which I feel like makes you not want to talk to me, I'd feel that way. I think, but I don't know. I don't know a lot when it comes to you. You're new to me, whole new ideals and mindset. I'm not used to this, at all. When I say diff mindset I mean like, the whole "Coming home to me" isn't anything I've heard before, and I'm still trying to understand and adjust. Just sounds like an open relationship to me. I think it's not that? I don't know. It's all so new, it's weird. I don't know how to feel or how to act about it or on it. I don't want to change who you are but does that mean I should change who I am? Is one of us right and the other is wrong? Are we both wrong and right? It's all so much, spinning in my mind. I don't want to lose you and I feel like we could work out, but sometimes I feel like I'm the only one willing to change. I'm trying to understand your pov but I don't feel like mine is getting seen. When we get into "ruts" and I misinterpret something you say. You say I'm "Putting words into your mouth" but when you do it your just understanding what I said better than I did. I don't like it. I don't like that. It's toxic, even if you don't realize you're doing it. You are. I don't want to argue or anything but I want to be able to speak my mind. I want to be able to have a conversation without you or me getting mad. I get you match energy but I don't do that to you, when you get mad at me and raise your voice I try my hardest to understand you. I get it, you're trying. But I need to get this off my chest. I can feel this mental weight leaving me. as I type. I don't want to ruin your day, or make you mad or cry. I just want to be able to be open. I know I struggle with understanding you when you're open. I'm sorry. I really am, we both have things we need to work on. I'd love to sit down and talk about it, like we planned. A weekly sit down chat about things. Sorry if this ruined your day or your mood.

I feel a lot better. After getting this off my chest. I'm not quitting, at least right now. I'm going to keep trying to be better for you. I know this whole thing is written poorly. Its pacing is weird, but it's how I think. This is straight from my brain. It's easier this way for me to express how I feel. I like you, a lot. I really do care about you, and us. I want to be better for you and myself. Sorry for all the times I've made you mad, or said the wrong thing. I know it's a lot to ask but could you tell me when I do? I never meant for you to feel like a dog, it's not how I meant it. I would have taken it back, trust me. I never want to hurt you like that. With my words or in any way. I'd never say something like that to hurt you, please. Trust me, and tell me so I can make it right. I can't read your mind, like how you can't read mine. Even if you can't tell me right away, please try and tell me at some point after. I don't want you hurting, especially if it's from something I said or did. 

[msookyspooky]

Set Up

Part 3

Word Count: 3,183

"YN, are you sure you don't want a ride? I'd feel better if you did." Sidney tried persuading you as you carried your bag over your shoulder in front of the school.

You sighed, "Sid, I don't want to put Tatum on the spot like that." 

Sidney rolled her eyes in exasperation. "YN, you are not putting her on the spot! Tatum is like the best friend a girl could ever have. If there is a problem she will tell you." 

You almost took the offer when someone cleared their throat behind you. You turned to see Randy standing there awkwardly with his hands in his pockets. Sidney glared at him in full mom friend mode. 

"Randy, if you start again about-" 

He held up a hand. "I'm not. I just wanted to talk to YN...About…" He groaned and mumbled. "How much of an insensitive ass I am." 

Tatum walked up to Sidney, hearing what Randy said. She smirked, "First step to recovery is admitting you have a problem." 

He shot her an annoyed scowl as she wrapped an arm around Sidney. "YN, you want a ride?" 

You looked surprised. "Really? Are you sure?" 

She gave you a weird smirk. "Yeah? Why wouldn't I be?" 

You bit your lip, "You seemed...Mad." 

Tatum let out a laugh. "What? Why would I be mad?" 

You mumbled. "Well...Stu-" 

She rolled her eyes with a laugh. "Please. I was mad at Stu, not you. He can't take a hint if it was thrown in his face. He was clearly making you uncomfy. I'd be mad at any pigheaded guy doing that let alone my BF." 

"Yeah, totally..." You whispered in response.

The truth was, it didn't make you uncomfortable. You cared about Stu as a friend only. At least, that's how you thought you felt. But that hug was more intimate than any guy has ever hugged you. You knew Tatum was majorly uncomfortable but you? You were more confused than anything.

"Exactly." Tatum replied, "I'd never be mad at you for something like that."

You blinked before slowly smiling.

She asked again, "So, you want a lift?" 

You looked back at Randy who was standing there quietly. Truthfully, you'd rather ride with the girls but you felt bad for Randy after he swallowed his pride to try and make things right. You shook your head with a smile. 

"No thanks. I think Randy wanted me to walk with him." 

She made a face as Randy looked hopefully at you.

"Ookkaaayyy, call us when you get home. If you don't get home by 6 then I know Randy was the killer and I have to tear his throat out." 

Randy rolled his eyes, "I am not the killer and as if a girl could do that anyways." 

You raised a brow. "Oh, so you don't like being accused of being a murderer either?" 

He looked guilty, looking away and tensing his shoulders. You felt a bit bad and sighed with a smile before addressing the girls. "It's alright, I'll just let Randy walk me home. I think I can take him if he tries something. " 

Randy huffed at that comment as Tatum laughed. "Please, my 6 year old cousin could." She gave Randy a look. "I'm warning you, dork. Touch her and lose fingers." She pointed at him as she walked backwards with Sidney as Sidney just shook her head with a smirk and walked ahead of her. 

"Call us when you get home!" Sidney yelled behind herself to you.

You waved goodbye to Tatum and Sidney as you and Randy went down Corwin street. 

He shook his head. "God, she is such a-" 

"Hey, that's my friend Randy." 

"Yeah, yeah." 

The air was quiet before you passed another street and he finally blurted out. "Look, I'm really sorry. I suck at apologizing but I shouldn't have pointed fingers at you in front of everyone like that." 

"Oh, so you should have accused me in private?" 

"YN, cut me a break here." 

You frowned at him. "No. You accused me of murdering my boyfriend in front of our entire friend group. Even if James and I had a bad relationship towards the end, it was wrong." 

He solemnly nodded. "You're right. I'm an ass." 

"Hell, you didn't even offer condolences-" 

"I know! I'm sorry, okay? I say shit without thinking and the stress is getting to me. I'm a jerk! I get it." 

You saw him hang his head, hands in his pocket as he walked and stared at the sidewalk. 

You nudged him with your shoulder and he looked up at you. "Hey, we all are. That's why it's important no matter how stressed we get; we just can't turn on each other right now." 

He went to say something, probably some horror movie rule or trope but stopped himself. "Yeah, you're right. Hell, my friend group is small enough as it is. I don't need to scare you all off. After that, my friends are Vincent Price and Alfred." 

You smiled at him. "Eh, my group's small too. I don't know how we started hanging with Tatum and Stu. They're like, thee it couple right now." 

He licked his lips in thought. "...Yeah, especially with Casey and Steve gone." 

Your smile faded and he ran a hand over his neck. "Sorry, no turning on each other or murder talk. Got it." 

You debated after a few paces whether to say anything but finally gave in. "Randy...Do you think that…Tatum and Stu could be?" You trailed off.

He glanced up at you. "Do you?" 

You looked away. "I...No, but...It would be convenient to get rid of the competition. They both hated James." 

He shrugged. "I think everyone hated James, to be honest" His eyes lit up. "Oh yeah, speaking of Stu and Tatum, are you going to his party tomorrow?" 

You scoffed. "Why the hell is everyone so happy to go to a party with a murderer on the loose?" 

He shrugged. "Dumbass teenagers, what do you expect?" He raised a brow at you with a smirk. " So, are you going?" 

"I don't know…" 

"Well, I wanted to know because uh…" He cleared his throat again and shuffled his hands in his pocket. "I was wondering if you wanted a ride?" 

You blinked, "Really? But your job." 

"I'm off tomorrow. Ya know, killer on the loose and lockdown or whatever. I mean, good luck keeping teens in during an outbreak of the flu or the stabbies." 

You chuckled at that. "Well, I was going with Tatum and Sid if I do go but I hate for you to be lonely." You teased.

He smiled at you. "Hey, we need numbers. So I'm solo, you're solo...One plus one equals two." 

"True. But...I don't know. I mean, we were just talking about Stu and Tatum possibly being involved. Now you want to go to a party he's hosting?" 

"Yeah but we can still go together. It's safer that way!" 

You gave him a questioning look. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're hinting." 

He flinched, stumbling over his words with a nervous grin. "W-what? Nooo. No! Especially after your boyfriend died. That's not-" 

You chuckled. "I'm messing with you, Randy. I know it's just a friend looking out for a friend. Especially with my boyfriend just dying. I'm not exactly open to going out with any guy for awhile. " You emphasized your point.

Randy went to say something else when someone grabbed you from the bushes. Your heart dropped as a hand wrapped around your arm. You both screamed before seeing it was Billy. Not even a smirk on his face, just scaring you out of nowhere like it was his job. 

You angrily smacked his shoulder.and he didn't even flinch. "GOD DAMN YOU, BILLY! WHAT THE HELL?!" You shouted, your heart still hammering out of your chest.

He finally twitched the corner of his lip, amusement in his eyes. "Gotta be on high alert at the moment, right?" He stared at Randy. " And with a killer out here, it could be anyone." 

Randy stared back at him with narrowed eyes. "Yeah, because hiding in the bushes screams 'not the killer.'" 

Billy glared and Randy subconsciously took a step back. You rolled your eyes at Billy. "Seriously, what are you doing?" 

"Just walking. What are you doing?" 

"Randy was walking me home." 

He gave a mocking smile. "Oh, how gentlemanly of you, Randy." 

Randy pushed his tongue in his cheek and refused to look at Billy.

Billy spoke up again. "Well, looks like I can walk YN home the rest of the way. Your streets right there." He gestured with his head to the street sign. You all looked to see Randy's street was at the corner.

"Well, I was going to walk her home then just go back-" 

"That's alright, I can. No need for you to go out of your way, pal." He gave, the sarcasm dripping off his words.

Randy bit his inner cheek, wanting to argue. He looked at you but you nodded your head. "I'll be alright. I'll call you as soon as I get home." 

He hesitantly nodded. "Alright…If you insist." 

You watched Randy walk away as Billy motioned for you to walk with him. "Come on, I'll make sure you get home safe." 

You stared at him with an accusing glare. "Are you following me??" 

He huffed. "Pst. No." 

"Really? Then why are you walking on the other side of town? You live that way." You pointed behind you with your thumb. "And don't you have a Camero?"

He drew out a heavy sigh past his lips before giving a reluctant nod. "Okay fine, you caught me." 

"Why?" You raised a brow. 

"Because there is a killer on the run and…" He looked back to make sure no one was around before whispering. "And I don't trust Meek, alright?" 

You blinked in surprise, "Randy?? You actually think Randy could or would do that?" 

"Keep your voice down. Look, the kid's pointing fingers at everyone as if he isn't a horror fanatic." 

You chuckled with a bewildered look. "Uhhh, that's the pot calling the kettle black." 

"Not the same. Look, I just don't trust him, okay? With James being killed, I just wanted to make sure you got home safe. He's right, there is a target on your head." 

"You actually think Randy could take down James? By himself?"

He rubbed his face in agitation as he replied. "Just take my word for it. What if he really is involved? It didn't sit right with me seeing you leave with him from the school."

You smirked. "Awww, you do care!"  

"Shut up. I just don't want to see Sidney cry because your insides are around your neck." You could see the faintest smirk pull at his lip before he forced it away.

"Uh huh. I think Billy would cry too." You suggested and he gave you an annoyed glance.

He changed the subject. "Why are you hanging out with him anyways? Didn't the guy accuse you of murder today?" 

 You shrugged. "That's why he was walking me home; to apologize." 

He rolled his eyes. "Oh, how sweet. He really is a gentleman." 

"Oh and you are?" You raised a brow and he gave an insulted scoff.

"Hey, I can be when I want to. I'm going out of my way walking you home for your safety right now, aren't I?" He hesitated before saying it. "...I heard he was offering you a ride." 

"Yeah, so?" 

He scrunched his brows. "And you're going to take it? That is the stupidest thing you could do." 

"Billy, Randy is harmless. Besides, even if he isn't, I would kick his ass." 

You thought that would get a laugh out of him but he stopped you, grabbing your shoulder to look at him.

"I'm serious, YN. I don't want you riding alone with him. Stay away from him." His tone was deathly serious as his hand squeezed you tighter.

You raised your brows. "Uh, I'm glad you're looking out for me but since when do you tell me who I can't be around?" 

He glared at you and released your shoulder. "YN, don't make it like that. The kid clearly has motives." 

You gave him a questioning look before he answered.

"Do I have to spell it out for you? He's a creep. He probably steals women's underwear or some shit. He is desperate. "

"Oh, thanks so much for that."

He groaned. "Desperate as in he would jump at the chance for anything with a rack to look in his direction. He's always had a weirdo vibe even when we were kids. All I see is him eyeing you up and down."

You rolled your eyes into the back of your skull. "Oh my god. What are you, my Dad?"

"You want to be raped and left for dead like Maureen?"

You faltered at that as he raised his brows at you. He continued, "I'm serious, YN. Stay away from him. I was the one that grew up with him, not you."

"I get that but I think I know when a guy is crushing on me. I don't get any weird vibes from him. Besides, Randy doesn't even like me like that he likes-" 

You shut your trap as Billy raised his brows at you.

"Who?" 

You fumbled. "He uh...He likes...Um shit, what is her name again?" You tried saving yourself with a nervous laugh. He stared at you with those intense eyes. It was impossible to stay composed with how he was staring at you, lifting a brow with an unimpressed look on his face.

"YN, he likes my girlfriend. God, it's almost painful watching you lie." 

Your mouth hung open slightly. "Wait, you knew?" 

He sneered in disgust as you both walked. "It's so fucking obvious. He's constantly trying to hang out with her the minute I'm gone. Doesn't have the balls to do it in front of me. Like I said, he's a god damn creep." 

You gave a curious look as understanding dawned on you. "So, that's your real issue with him. You don't like Randy because he likes Sid." 

"Oh please, I'm not that insecure." 

You glanced over at him. "...Billy." 

He glared at you. "I'm not."

He shrugged and looked away. "Sure, me and Sid are having a rough patch but she'll come around. I just don't appreciate some nerd creeping on my girl."

"Billy...Just give her space. She lost her mom last year." 

"Yeah and I lost my mom two years ago. We've all lost something. " You could hear the bitterness in his voice. 

You mumbled. "...You want to talk about it?" 

"YN, you offer to talk about my issues every time it's brought up. If I wanted to talk about it, I would have by now." He snapped.

"Okay." You quietly said.

He was silent before sighing and running a hand through his hair. "Sorry...Just...It's a sore subject Stop asking." 

"I know, I'm sorry. I just want to make sure you know I'm here, okay? I'm here for Sidney too. Just be patient with her. Don't bombard her at the party tomorrow either or you'll really scare her off. That is, if Tatum doesn't rip your ass first before you get the chance." 

He stared at you a moment before drawing out. "I was actually wondering…Well, nevermind." He shook his head with his hands in his pocket.

You looked at him. "What?" 

"No, nevermind. You won't do it for me."

"Billy, what? Just spit it out "

"Okay, I need someone to break the ice with me and her." 

You scoffed in outrage. "Absolutely not!" 

"See? I knew you wouldn't have my back." He mumbled as you shook your head. 

"It's not about having your back! I wish you two would kiss and make up. Seriously, I think we all would be happier without the tension in the group but I'm not doing it! I'm not manipulating her into giving you a second chance."

"Look-" You glared at him as you ranted, getting in front of his walking path to be face to face. He just stared down at you with annoyance in his eyes as you both walked.

"I don't even think I'm going, okay? So find someone else." 

He froze, pausing mid step to stare at you. You stopped in your tracks to see why he wasn't walking. He genuinely looked upset and you didn't understand why. 

"What?" His eyes were wide. "You have to go!" 

"I don't have to go anywhere." 

"Yes, you do! You're seriously going to bail on everyone? Stu was looking forward to you going; we all were!" 

"Oh my god, what is it with you guys and this stupid party?!" 

He shook his head and threw up his hands. "It's important to Stu! If you were a good friend, you wouldn't bail on him at the last minute." He was getting angry, desperately urging you to go. His hands rapidly moving around with every word to emphasize his point.

"Billy, don't say that. You know I care about Stu just as much as anyone but it's stupid to have a party right now. Honestly, I don't understand why you all are going!" 

"Because that's what friends do. We were all counting on you to go! Stu's gonna be heartbroken…I'm not too happy either. I need you, okay? I really do need you tommorow." His shoulders sagged as he frowned at you. "Please...Sidney won't talk to me or look at me right now. I'm desperate...I love her, YN." 

He gave you a sad stare. You sighed and persed your lips. For Billy to say he needed anyone, he really was desperate. You surmised he was angry because he was counting on you to convince Sidney to hear him out. 

You shook your head. "Billy, I'm sorry but I am not getting involved. If you love her, you would wait for her." 

"I've BEEN waiting, YN. I have been patient, understanding, all that shit a boyfriend is supposed to be. I ask you for one thing and you can't even try to consider it!" 

You studied him for a moment, things clicking from what he was saying to why he was saying them. Realization dawned on you and you sneered at him. "....You asshole." 

 "What?" You didn't answer and threw up his hands. "What?!" He demanded again as you shook your head with a death glare in his direction.

 Anger in your eyes and a feeling of betrayal in your chest. "You fucking used me! You weren't making sure I got home okay; you just wanted to guilt trick me into helping you gaslight your girlfriend!" 

His dark eyes widened and he scoffed in disbelief. "What?! That is not true! You're making a big deal out fucking nothing! "

"You don't even really care about me around Randy; you just have some rivalry with him. Here I thought you actually cared." Your tone died off, hurt in your voice whether you liked it or not.

"What? Do you actually think I give a shit enough about Meek to go out of my way for you?! You are being so fucking dramatic and stupid right now!"

"No, I'm seeing clearly how you are! You know what? If you're this manipulative with your friends to get your way then maybe Sidney shouldn't be with you."

"YN." He snapped your name, making you turn to look at him. His shoulders tensed and he tilted his head. Closing his eyes to compose himself. "Don't say something you'll regret. You can't take words back no matter how much you apologize, YN. So how about you stop before you make a giant mistake."

You threw up your hand at him with an offended huff. "There! There you go again! Just put all the blame on me for calling you out on your bullshit."

He angrily walking towards you, confronting you face to face and glaring at you. You refused to step back even if you felt scared at just how intense he was right now.

"Is this the thanks I get for sticking up for you? Huh?! I could have gotten written up and my ass kicked by my dad for you! I could have been suspended! I risked my ass to defend yours and I don't even get a fucking thank you!" He hissed out through clenched teeth.

You glared back at him before it slowly faded into a frown. He stared into your eyes as he watched your anger fizzle out. His scowl leaving as he waited.

"No, I'm sorry." You sighed. "You're right, I should be grateful. I didn't even thank you. Billy, I am grateful for you sticking up for me, okay? I really am." 

He stared at you, looking taken aback and searching your gaze for something. You didn't know what other than he was making sure you were being truthful with him.

You looked at him sadly. "I'm sorry. It's been a hell of a week and very long day. I know you didn't walk me home just to use me."

You saw his Adam's apple move and his mouth tighten. He had an unreadable expression. His eyes wide and something clearly bothering him as his lips curved downward into a frown.

You kept talking. "You're a good friend Billy. That's why I don't understand why you're pressuring Sid right now? It's not like you." 

He cleared his throat and tried to subtly distance himself from you. Taking a step back and folding his arms. Closing himself off from you. Rubbing his nose and looking away, trying to hide whatever emotion he was feeling.

"Oh, so you know me? You think you know everything about me? You haven't even been here a year." 

You sighed to yourself at him deflecting. "Yeah, I do. You and I have always clicked until now. Are these murders changing all of us that much?" You sadly asked.

He looked away, biting his inner cheek before he continued, "Whatever. Forget I asked. I just thought as a good friend you would at least talk to her for me."

"We are but not for long if you keep acting like such a jerk." You muttered as you started walking again. 

He threw his hands up and exclaimed. "Yeah, that's real nice. Let's just make up just for you to shove a knife in me. So, you can talk to her about me but you can't talk to her for me? You can have your little girl talk on the bleachers but-" 

You stopped. Turning to him in shock halfway through his rant. He saw the look on your face and stopped talking. 

"...How did you know we were on the bleachers?" 

He faltered. "...What? I was just giving an example." 

 "We never talk on the bleachers. How did you know Sid and I were talking on the bleachers today?" 

He expertly dodged the question with an answer but you could still tell something was off.

"Duh, Stu told me. He said he left with Tatum and you and Sid stayed. Why are you acting so weird?"

You swallowed. "...How long were you following me and Randy? I didn't even see you at the school so how would you know where we were?"

"Why are you trying to make it look like I'm stalking you? Let me guess, you don't trust me either." He frowned at that. 

You swallowed, a sinking feeling in your stomach.

"I...I gotta go." You quickly turned and picked up your pace.

You heard Billy call out to you. "YN, wait! Don't be like this! YN!!" He shouted, his yelling was urgent as he called out to you. He was doing a lot of yelling recently. His whole personality was shifting before your eyes the last week. Subtly, little tiny things were off but it was still a change.

You didn't like it.

"I'm walking home by myself, Billy!" You yelled back, your hand shook as you gripped your bag tighter. 

You practically jogged away as you heard him calling out to you. "YN! DON'T! Don't shun me like Sidney! Please!" His voice wavered towards the end.

You didn't look back. Despite his sad voice, despite you caring for him...Something was off. His stories, his actions. It was wrong. You could feel it. Sidney could feel it. Randy could feel it.

Billy was lying. 

You rushed home, reaching your door and bolting it shut behind you. You closed your eyes and calmed your breath. Your throat burning as your stomach twisted. 

You didn't know who to trust. 

[anisstories]

I Don't Want This

Chapter 6

The Next Morning

When Y/N awoke in the morning, she panicked, she didn’t know this room, and then she turned around. There was Anakin asleep, the sun shining on his face. His hair seemed to become even more golden. Y/N still felt tipsy. She looked at the foot of the bed and there were her clothes. It was 5 in the morning and no sound was heard. I doubt anyone’s awake, I’ll change, leave a note, and get a cab to the company. Shit, how strong is a Flameout? I'm falling back into a drunken state. Before that could happen she stood up, put her clothes on, went to Anakin’s desk grabbed a post-it, and started to right:

Hey Anakin,

I didn’t want to wake you up. Thanks for letting me crash here last night. Sorry for being such a bother. I promise I will never drink when you're around.

Next time I see you we'll be "happily married".

Warm Regards,

Y/N

Heiress to the Aridam Empire XD.

Anakin awoke to the sound of shuffling in his room. He turned around and saw Y/N writing something on a sticky note. The events of last night came to his mind. WHAT IS SHE DOING HERE? I should have kicked her out yesterday. She'll pay at this moment. Anakin got out of bed and stalked over to her. Y/N turned around only to be met with Anakin's bare chest. His pectorals glistened in the sunlight. "Hey, sorry I didn't mean to wake you. I was just about to leave. Sorry for-" "Last night I brought you into my home and you know who saw? Padmé. You already ruined my relationship. So you're going to stay here and we're going to be caught sleeping together. I don't care if your dignity is at stake." Anakin said as he pushed Y/N onto the bed. "Strip" Anakin said his voice and face were void of emotion. "w-what do you m-mean strip?" "Strip. Don't make me repeat myself." She felt a weight next to her. "I don't want to touch your disgusting body. So strip and go back to sleep. If you don’t I’m going to have to strip you myself, and you won’t like that." Y/N felt so embarrassed but she started stripping, fearing what Anakin would do if she disobeyed. She hesitated when she reached her panties. "Keep your underwear on." He opened the comforter for her. She stepped in, her back facing his chest, and felt Anakin's arms wrap around her bare waist. She felt so vulnerable in only her bra and panties. She knew that if someone walked in she would face the biggest embarrassment of her life. She started to squirm, to get away. But his grip tightened. "I said go to sleep," he growled. Anakin wasn't human anymore. He had gone feral. The love of his life was probably lost and all because of this stupid girl that laid next to him.

There was no going through to him. He roughly turned Y/N around. "Stop squirming. You said you'd follow my lead, so do it." He pulled her closer. Y/N started hitting his chest, muttering I hate you. Anakin grabbed her wrists. "Stop" his voice an octave lower. Y/N stopped. I hate you too, Y/N. Once we get married, I'll make your life a living hell. Anakin started to rub her back. Trying to get her to sleep. He wanted this to seem natural. He finally heard light snoring from Y/N. He went to grab his phone but feared the messages he would find there. He placed it back and started playing with Y/N's hair to help him fall asleep.

At 7 there was a knock at his door. Y/N jolted but Anakin held her tighter. He pulled the comforter low enough to reveal his bare chest and Y/N's bra. Then he heard Owen's voice "If I don't hear shuffling in 1 second I'm coming in." Of course it had to be this asshole. He grabbed Y/N's chin and started nuzzling into her neck. This caused Y/N to start whimpering. "You’re a piece of shit, you know that?" she said as she tried to push him away. “So I’ve heard” he mumbled. Anakin got tired of getting pushed away, so he flipped them over. He was hovering above her. Y/N’s arms got tired so he just pulled them to her side. This caused the comforter to fall off the bed. Owen walked in to see Anakin on top of Y/N. "Oh Maker. Fuck. Oh shit, I'm so sorry." Owen stuttered. "Can you stop staring at MY girl?" Anakin growled. "I wasn't staring at her. I was staring at you. Are you that insatiable?" Owen started laughing. "What do you - " and Anakin groans. Y/N accidentally brushed her leg against Anakin's groin and he felt a strong surge of pleasure coarse through his body. Shit, I was supposed to be mad. Not get turned on. "USE PROTECTION KIDS '' Owen closed the door and Anakin’s alarm clock hit it. He could hear Owen's laughter down the hall.

Y/N looked at Anakin’s sweatpants. There was a large bulge in them. When I brushed against it, his face contorted, I think it was out of pain. Y/N started brushing her knee against it. Anakin's eyes nearly popped out of his socket. "Mm..stop." Anakin was becoming less mad. Fuck this is bad... "No, this is payback for this morning." Y/N started brushing faster and harder. "Y-Y/N, h-hold o-o-oh Fuck!" Anakin spit. He fell on top of her chest. Y/N would've been mad. But when he fell onto her chest she had better access to that spot. Anakin started thrusting his hips into her knee. Y/N's name falling out of his lips. At this moment Y/N realized he hadn't groaned out of pain, he had groaned out of pleasure. So she pulled her knee away. Anakin's hips thrust into the air. Y/N heard Anakin moan out in pain. "Y-you, you’re a bitch" he growled. “Says the guy who forced me to strip.” She tried to get up only to fail, as Anakin had a death grip on her waist. "Hey let go," Y/N grumbled. Anakin refused. His breathing was labored and his forehead had a layer of sweat. "It hurts. Give me a fucking second!” he yelled. Y/N rolled her eyes, muttered I hope you die of pain and reached for her phone, or that’s what she thought at least. When she opened “her” phone she saw a bunch of messages.

Anakin I can’t believe you did that.

I fucking knew it. You’re a piece of shit.

I hope you get thrown into a ditch.

I can’t believe you got with my best friend.

I hope you both die.

We are done.

Don’t look or try to talk to me.

Y/N dropped the cellphone. It fell on Anakin’s head. “I’m already in pain and you dropped a cellphone on my head. I fucking hate you.” as he looked up he saw Y/N looking at him with guilty eyes. “I thought that was my phone and I read the messages Padme sent you. I’m sorry I fucked up your relationship,” she mumbled. “What do they say?” he asked, his tone cold and detached. Y/N started to read aloud the messages and Anakin felt his heart crack piece by piece. “Oh well, it was bound to happen,” he felt a sharp sting on his cheek. “How can you say that? I mean you have her as LOML on your contacts. You said you were gonna get us out of it and suddenly you're okay with getting married to me?” she said. “You don’t even feel a tiny bit sad. Don’t you want to scream or cry? If that was me I'd be very outraged." Y/N looked out the window. "Can you be logical? You think we were going to convince our parents. That was a false hope Y/N. They were gonna force us to get married. Padme isn't the type to share her boyfriend so its end was inevitable anyway." Anakin grumbled. I can't make her life miserable. She is suffering just as much as I am. I mean Y/N's here saying sorry for ruining my relationship. And it wasn't even her fault. I should be the one on my knees begging for forgiveness. I forced her to strip. Anakin got up and knelt before her. "Huh?! Anakin what are you doing?" She asked as she sat up. "I'm sorry. I was just so mad and so sad that I had lost Padme. I lost all human decency and forced you to strip. I'm sorry. I know that's not enough but I'm afraid that's all I have." Anakin's voice cracked. He was so ashamed of what he'd done.

Y/N felt bad. She knew he had done those things out of rage, but it doesn’t mean they didn’t hurt her. She reached for his arm and pulled him up. “It’s okay, I know you did them out of rage.” Anakin’s face lit up, he was so happy he could hug her, as he was about to, she opened her mouth. “But, can I ask you for a favor?” She asked. Anakin blankly looked at her. She panicked and spoke up “I’m sorry, never mind, I just-” “Hey, I didn’t even answer. What is your request?” Anakin grabbed onto her shoulders. “I was wondering if you could convince my father to let me finish my Master's?” She asked while looking at her lap. “I don't know if I could convince your Father” Y/N’s eyes started to get sad, “But I can convince my father to pay your college tuition and you can go secretly.” Y/N jumped up and into Anakin’s arms. He lost his balance so before he fell he pushed himself onto the bed. His cheek falling against her lips. “Oh damn, I smeared your lipstick.” “It’s fine.” Y/N started to giggle. “Thank you, Anakin,” she smiled so brightly and softly, but she was also crying, his heart fluttering. “Yea, no problem.” Anakin's voice sounded wistful, but Y/N didn’t hear it, she was too busy swimming in his clear blue eyes. “I never noticed,” Y/N whispered. Anakin hummed, asking her to continue. “Your eyes, they look like a lake.” she giggled. “They are pretty. If you looked up at the sun, your eyes would probably glitter like a real lake.” Anakin felt so flustered. No one ever complimented his eyes. Well, they had, but not in the way Y/N had. It was always nice eyes. You probably get all the chick with those eyes. “Thank you, your eyes are pretty too.” “Your E/C eyes lit up. “They get all bright and shimmery when you're excited about something. They get dull when you’re sad or frustrated. When you get embarrassed they glitter more than they’re supposed to.” Anakin started leaning in. The moment was shattered when they heard a commotion downstairs.

Taglist

@songbirdcannabe

@blondekel77

Note:

My summer classes have started so I will begin to post on Mondays. Thank you for understanding.

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

The Perfect Bad Boy (Pt. 02 of 18)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove X Reader

Word count: 2.5K

Summary: Working as a lifeguard in the Hawkins Community Pool, you try to fit in after moving from New York. Things were going pretty well when you notice you've been under someone's stare. Billy Hargrove, Hawkins' bad boy, has been staring at you since day one. You never intended to have anything to do with him, judging by the reputation he has. But Billy won't leave you alone, determined to show you his feelings are different this time...

As if your heart flooding you with confusing feelings wasn't enough, there are weird, strange animals lurking in the woods... But those have to be just part of the wild live of the woods surrounding Hawkins... Right?

<- Previous part (01)

Next part (03) ->

{Stranger Things Masterlist}

×

Car Trouble

“Are you having car trouble?” Billy asks, his eyes locked on yours.

“Judging by the smoke, yeah.” You sigh, opening the door and stepping out of the car. You avoid eye contact, looking at the light gray smoke instead.

“Pop the hood, let me check.” Doing as he says, you press the button as you sit back on the driver's seat, hoping he can actually fix whatever is wrong just so you can make it home. “Bad news.” He says after a couple of minutes.” There's nothing I can do. Not here, at least.”

“Are you sure?”

“One hundred percent.” He lets the hood fall before coming to stand by the door. “Didn't it give any signs something was wrong?”

“It has been making this funny noise since I bought it. But that was a month ago, I didn't think it would actually stop working.” Taking a deep breath, you take your bag and get out, closing the door. “I'll call the mechanics when I get home. Thanks for checking it out.” You wave at him, walking away.

“I could give you a ride home if you want.”

“I'm alright. Don't want to be a bother.”

“I wouldn't offer you a ride if you were a bother. C'mon, I'm just trying to help a co-worker.”

You stop, turning to face Billy. He doesn't have to usual cocky expression he always has. And he's right. He's just offering a ride home because your car is broken, there's nothing more. Monica and those girls are just getting under your skin, making you think too much about something that doesn't deserve much thought. “Ok then.”

“Let's go.” Billy guides you to his Camaro and you get into the passenger seat. Seconds later you're spending up through the streets, and you buckle up because he's going a little too fast for your taste. You give him your address, not really paying attention to the route he's taking. Your eyes are on the landscape outside the window, passing by in a blur.

“Do you mind if I stop to get some tacos before dropping you off?”

“No.” Shrugging your shoulders, you run a hand through your hair as he parks in a small restaurant and gets out to buy his food. As you wait, you wonder if you should tell Monica about this. If you do, you probably won't hear the end of it. But it could also snap her out of this whole mission thing. Today she was silent again, overanalyzing Billy instead of watching the pools. At least she seems to be excited about something.

A whistle gets your attention, dragging you out of your thoughts. It's Billy at the restaurant's door, gesturing for you to go there. You're a little confused when you leave the car. Did he make the order and then realized he forgot his wallet or something?

“What's up?” You ask him, crossing your arms.

“Nothing. C'mon.” Billy guides you to a table on the back, where he sits. “I ordered you some tacos too.”

What the hell. “Do you even know if I have money with me? You should've asked.”

“But I didn't, did I?” He raises an eyebrow.

Taking a deep breath, you decide not to make a big deal out of it. “Whatever,” you mumble, sitting down across from him. It's so damn obvious he's staring now. He doesn't even try to hide it. Since you're here, you could try to put a stop to this nonsense. Sorry, Mon. Your mission will be over soon. “What are you looking at?” You ask, elbows on the table, finally meeting his gaze.

“You.” He simply says, and there's no hint he'll give further explanation.

You were just about to say something when the waitress comes with your tacos. They do look good, and you're a little hungry.

“I'll get something to drink. What do you want?”

“Ice cold Coca-Cola,” you answer, watching as he gets up. You don't wait for him to come back, you just start eating. The last time you ate tacos you were in elementary school.

“Here's your drink.” He places the can down and you open it, taking a sip. “So, new girl... How do you like this dipshit place?”

“I really like it. Hawkins is exactly what I was looking for.” Billy seems a little surprised, raising his eyebrows. “What? Did you think I was dragged here? I wanted to come.”

“Can't understand why anyone would want to live here.”

“I had my reasons.” Shrugging your shoulders, a loud laugh gets your attention. It's a girl you see often in the pool. She's friends with one of those girls from the locker... The girls who were talking about Billy. “Hey. Don't you have a date today? With that Jennifer girl?” It comes back to your mind, and you burst it out. “Let's go, I can take these and eat at home.” The last thing you want is Billy being mad because giving you a ride kept him from meeting some girl. So you get up, taking the plate and the can.

“Where are you going?”

“...Home? You're taking me home now so you won't be late to be with the girl.” Why do you have to state the obvious? You doubt he'd forget about a date.

“I am with a girl. Now sit down and relax.”

If this day gets any weirder, you're calling it a night and going back home immediately. “Fine. It's your night you're ruining.” You sit back down, defeated.

“Who said my night is ruined?”

“Billy...” Leaning forward, you look into his eyes. “Whatever you're trying here, it won't work.”

“I'm not trying anything.”

Alright. Time to end this game. “I'm not the kind of girl you hang out with, ok? Put your efforts on someone hot and beautiful, don't waste your time with me.” You take another bite of the taco on your plate.

“Wait. You don't think you're hot and beautiful?” He leans forward too, pushing his empty plate away, eyes on you.

He totally got the wrong part of what you said. “I'm... Ok. I'm cute but you can aim so much higher than me.” You're not blind, so you're not immune to Billy's effect. You have to admit you stole a few glances on your first days working on the pool, but knowing his reputation, you'd never let it go further than finding him handsome. “But they say beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, so...” You're done with the tacos, and you drink what's left of your Coca-Cola.

“I wish you could see yourself through my eyes then.” Billy lowers his voice, the smirk leaving his lips as if this statement is the most important thing in the world, a fact on which the whole Earth stands.

You gasp, giggling a little. “So that's how you do it. That's what you say to get your girls.”

“No. I say very different things.” The smirk is back, and you look away for a moment. You really hope you're not blushing.

“We're both done eating. Can we go now?”

“I haven't finished my drink yet.” He gestures at is can. “You don't need to leave your guard up all the time. We're just... Two friends hanging out. No big deal.”

“So we're friends now?” He simply nods. “You don't even speak to me at work, how can we be friends?”

“I'll change that, don't worry. You don't seem to have many friends, anyway.”

“I do. Monica and her little crew.” It's actually mostly just Monica, but he doesn't have to know that. “They're nice.”

“Well, you can just add me to your list of new friends then.” Billy smiles at you, and now that you get to see it, from up close, it's so damn beautiful. There's a secret behind it, something he's hiding, and it looks like he knows you're aware of that. “What do you say?” He reaches out his hand over the table. “Try to get to know me instead of judging by what you heard.”

You hesitate for a while before shaking his hand. You won't fall for his game, so there's no problem befriending the guy. And you must admit it's a little mean to judge someone by what people say. You rather judge him by his actions. “Fine, Billy Hargrove. We can try to be friends. But that's it. Nothing else.”

“Good.”

You stay at the restaurant for another hour before he finally takes you home. Your aunt is organizing some papers, so she doesn't make many questions. She's just happy you were out with someone. And you don't really give much thought to what happened. You actually had some fun today, and since you're still struggling to fit in, you're in no position to refuse any friendship you can get.

And it was kind of Billy to offer you a ride home. You're so attached to everything you heard of him that you didn't even felt thankful for his help. If he was the asshole people say he is, he'd just leave you in the parking lot, or take you straight home. But he didn't. Billy even paid for the tacos. It's mean of you to judge the guy so harshly, before exchanging any words with him. He does sleep with a different girl every night, but they go out with him because they want to. They know he won't stick to them. But this is just something he enjoys, it doesn't mean he's a total jerk. Right? Jennifer and her friend seemed okay with a one night stand, so it's obvious he's not forcing them into it. They know it's a one-time thing.

So if you take this part away, you're left with a normal guy. So, if he's not trying to make you fall on his game, maybe his intentions aren't what you think they are. It's harmless to try and get to know him. Maybe he can become a good friend, who knows?

During the next day in the pool, you're still thinking about it. You don't really understand why you're feeling a little guilty for thinking so low of Billy. So, as you're walking back to your post and Billy is coming from his chair, to take his lunch break, you decided to talk to him.

“Billy, can I talk to you for a sec?” You say when you're close enough.

“Of course. C'mon.” He tilts his head, gesturing for you to with him back into the cafeteria. You were just going to say it right here, but since he's already walking, you just follow him. Monica gives you a meaningful stare once she notices you're following Billy. But you shake your head no, trying to tell her this is nothing.

“I'll be quick. I have to get back to my chair.” You say as he sits down on the table. “I just wanted to say thank you for yesterday. For the ride home and for the snack you bought me.”

“That's it?” He seems genuinely confused.

“Yeah...” You stand there awkwardly, watching as his lips break into a smile.

“What happened to your car?”

“It'll be ready in two days. Mon is giving me a ride until then.” Shrugging your shoulders, you start making your way out. “Well, that's it. I gotta go.”

“Keep doing the good job.” He winks at you, and you can't hold back the smile that comes to your lips.

“I will.” Turning your back at him, you go back to your chair.

•••

By the end of the day, you're sitting shotgun in Monica's car, the windows opens to let the fresh wind come in.

“I have great news.” She says, smiling.

“Let's hear it.”

“Jennifer was super mad today. Now guess why.” You exchange a glance as you think if you should tell her or not. But she's so excited about it, and Jennifer has always been mean to her... So you decide to just say it.

“Because my car wouldn't start, so Billy offered a ride home. And in the process, he stopped by this restaurant and bought me tacos.” She hits the breaks so suddenly that your heart skips a beat. “Holy shit, Monica! Are you trying to get us killed?”

“What did you just say, (Y/N)?” She's dead serious, looking at you. “Explain it. And don't hold back the details.”

She drives slower, just to give you more time. She forces you to remember everything he said, and everything you said, overanalyzing every single word. She doesn't seem too convinced that Billy just wants to be friends, going on about how he looks at you. With affection, admiration. But you don't really believe that.

“Just the fact that he was straight forward with wanting to be your friends is impressive. You gotta understand this is not usual of Billy.” She says as you walk into your house since you invited her to stay for dinner. “Believe me, I know. I wouldn't be talking about Billy with you if I wasn't utterly perplexed.”

“Who's Billy?" Your aunt asks, coming from the kitchen, an amused smile on her face.

“Good evening, Mrs. Florence," Monica says, matching your aunt's tone.

“Call me Diane, dear. And tell me about this Billy.”

“He's just a friend, aunt. He gave me a ride home yesterday.” You and Monica follow her into the kitchen, sitting on the table.

“Yesterday? You came home late yesterday.” She rests her back on the counter, looking at you. You feel like you were busted doing something wrong.

“He wanted to eat tacos so since I was with him, we just stopped by a small restaurant at the side of the road.” Shrugging your shoulders, you try to act casual. But why are you trying to act casual? It was a casual meeting.

“Did he pay?”

“Yes, but–”

“Then it was a date,” Diane states before turning around, her attention back to her current task.

You feel your cheeks burning as you exchange a glance with a smirking Monica. “It wasn't a date.” You have no idea how you could make this more clear than that. “If it was a date he would have kissed me goodnight.” You use the cliche every romance movie implements, trying to change their minds. “If that doesn't happen, it's not a date.”

“Well, say whatever you want. But tomorrow you'll be going out with me and the guys. No Billy.” Monica says, gesturing at you.

Whatever. You don't have to explain anything, and time will show them there's nothing between you and Billy. “Count me in,” you tell her, looking down at your hands for a moment. It will be good. No Billy, nobody talking about Billy for a change. It's your second week here, and it feels like it's all been about him from the start. You can't wait until people realize that everything that's ever gonna happens, if it happens, is just a friendship. Nothing more.

[giulsherondale]

"Please change your expression."

"What expression?"

"I'm talking about your sly grin, please change."

"I can't get over myself."

She slaps Serkan😂

"Love gets tired of a lots of whims."

Serkan kissed her again😍

Eda compares Serkan to potatoes. His faces were so funny during the speech.

"You agree with the fact that I have brought color to your boring life?"

"Color? You brought the whole rainbow in my life."

Serkan Bolat definitely knows how to made a woman swoon at his feet.

I love the fact that Leyla calls Eda immediately when Serkan does not respond at her calls. And I love that Serkan turn off the phone every time he's with Eda, because he doesn't want to be disturbed even more.

What the hell Alptekin you have the courage to ask for divorce like that?! Where is your pride? He didn't even say sorry to her. Bad move, zero character development.

Selin and her last sneaky move, she made everyone guilty, Ferit, Eda and even Ceren. I really can't stand her. The only thing that she did right was selling the shares.

I liked the way Serkan reacted to the truth revelation, he actually surprised me when he forgive Ferit immediately. So proud of him.

Aydan hug with Eda and Serkan... Ahh Aydan you don't have an idea of how much I love you.

"To make amends, i give you a chance."

"A chance?"

"Yes."

"What are you up to Serkan Bolat?"

"The right to three wishes."

Honestly... Serkan is soooo smart. Great move babe. I love that he asked her to fulfill three wishes.

"Why doesn't she speak? Engin don't talk like you don't know Piril. With women like Piril, one should listen not to what they say, but to what they are silent about."

Serkan and Engin friendship is so special. And Serkan really knows how to advise friends in love. And I love the fact that when Engin asks him how is going with Eda he tells him that Eda has to try too to get their relationship work. It's so true actually, because by now only Serkan made steps towards Eda, but now she has to do that too.

"If you have time, I'd like to discuss something with you."

"Yes, I have something to tell you."

"If you will allow me, I will begin. I understand that I could not become a good father for you. But I'm sure that... You will be a wonderful father. I don't know how important my opinion is to you, but believe me... Eda is a very correct person. If you don't make the mistakes that I have made you will be very happy. "

"Thank you for your words. I never want to see you again. Not in my... You will never appear again in my mother's life."

"Yes. I will not appear in your life again. You can be sure. But... One day, I know that you will forgive me. And further... If one day you need help or get stuck... Then I'll be there. You are my son and I am your father. And nothing will change that."

I actually really liked this conversation. I still hate Alptekin but this was nice. And the thing that I like the most is that when Alptekin goes away he put the chair in place. It's a little thing but so important. We all knew this "order" obsession, and I was happy to see that he noticed that. And Kerem acting in this scene was amazing. And how sweet was Ferit that he wanted to check on Serkan to saw if he was okay.

"Are you free?"

"Yes. I'm always free for you."

"I was worried about you... Alptekin bey..."

"In moments like this, Eda, I have a wonderful remedy. This is work. Work is the second thing in the world that makes me feel good."

"What’s the first thing?"

"Guess?"

"Sports activities?"

"No."

"Vacation?"

"No."

"Nothing else comes to my mind."

"This don't get out of my head at all."

EDA IT'S HIS FIRST THING THAT MAKES HIM FEEL GOOD.

"Good. Perfect. Really good."

"Perfect?"

"Perfect. I'm talking about the portfolio. She's also beautiful in human terms. And the great thing is that she knows English."

"English... And portfolio. Everyone here knows English."

"Yes."

"Are they all beautiful?"

"That's why they work for us Eda."

"Did you say that they are all beautiful?"

"Yes... So... Good."

"In my opinion, none of them."

"Eda, they are all successful in their field."

"We cannot know this from one interview. As you know, but Efe wouldn't want to."

"Efe wouldn't want to... But Efe is not here."

"That's it, which one suits you? Which one of them?"

"I'm looking for a decent PR manager who will be good at his job. You... Are little..."

"A little what?"

"Are you jealous?"

"Me? Jealous?"

"A little."

"Don't be silly."

"A little bit."

"No! Why should I be jealous?! But they stick to you, you know? Pay attention to this, they were glued. Of course it doesn't concern me... But if you like this attention... As you want."

"If you feel calmer we can find a man."

I love jealous Eda, just like Serkan loves her jealous. It was so funny to watch her being jealous. And Eda expression when she sees Balca... Priceless.

"Then consider the males candidates, because women pisses you off a little."

I'm in love with confident Serkan.

Selin sneaky move pt. 2. Why the hell did she tells Balca every about Serkan private life? And why did she tells her that if she want to have success in the agency she has to know Serkan personally? Really Selin you couldn't have Serkan so now you don't want him to be happy with Eda? What a waste of character... I'm actually mad at her she's really the worst.

Have you noticed Bedo (the hairstylist) between the journalists?😂

SORRY BUT I'M STILL HERE... PHYSICALLY... MENTALLY... EMOTIONALLY❤️✨

"I want you to surprise me."

"How?"

"On one night you knock on my door."

"Why should I come to you?"

"So that you surprise me."

"And then what? Leave?"

"You will come in."

"To do what? I'm leaving."

"Eda, sit down. You will come into my house and watch a movie with me."

"Suddenly? Are you suggesting that I knock on your door?"

"You knock on my door."

"We will see a movie?"

"Exactly."

"Only?"

"We can eat popcorn too."

"Popcorn? You don't eat that Serkan."

"I have changed a lot Eda. I'll eat, even if a little, but we will eat them... Very little."

"I think I can agree to that."

The fact that Serkan want to know if she will come to his house tonight show us how badly he wants to spend some time alone with her. My romantic robot.

Serkan prepare the entire house in a romantic way, with candles, wine, soft light... And when someone finally knock at his door... Who is he? Engin, and than Ferit... And in the end Erdem. This scene was hilarious, sooo funny. I actually like this boys night, I'd like that they will do that more often. And when Engin notices that the house is really warm I thought... Soo Serkan I wonder why you warm up the house like that... You don't want that Eda gets cold right?😏

I really like Ferit and Ceren together, they are cute.

The way Eda go near Serkan as she sees Selin. I love my protective woman. And I hate how they wrote Selin, no character development, she keeps running after a dream that she made with Serkan... Girl go and do something for yourself for once. I'm so happy that we get rid of her, but I'm sad for Bige, she is actually a really good actress.

During the dance scene I felt too much. The chemistry was on fire🔥

Engin proposal... I loved it. You know I go horse riding and if my boyfriend would have ask me to marry him on a white horse I would have said yes immediately😂. And how proud Serkan was of his friends. I love their friendship.

What the hell Serkan? What the hell? Pizza? With Balca? No I'm sorry maybe I didn't understand... A beautiful speech about a woman changing your life, the fact that she made you live again but really Serkan? I really don't understand him? Why he behave like that? My poor baby Eda. I know that Serkan doesn'tlike Balca in that way but I understand her if she gets mad and starts screaming. Come on Serkan help yourself a little.

[echo-three-one]

Chapter 24

I should really put effort on summaries, right? Anyways... Enjoy! ❤️

Table of Contents

Going Dark - Part 3

Gary "Roach" Sanderson

MacTavish Residence, Glasgow, Scotland

Roach never would have guessed that MacTavish was a big time. Their 'old' house was already a mansion, complete with guest rooms, extravagant furniture and even an outdoor pool. Roach could stay here forever.

He was laying on a queen sized bed relaxing after a tiring chase earlier when Ghost knocked on his door and let himself in.

"What's wrong mate?" he asked, lifting only his head. Ghost leaned by the door and crossed his arms.

"You know how I got into a little argument with France back in Brazil right? Well, I still regret it ever happening…" he frowned, as shown by the way the fabric of his mask twitched.

"You regret which part? The fighting or the telling her what you feel?" Gary asked, cornering the ever vague Simon. He always does that when it comes to asking for advice.

Ghost ran a hand across his face and groaned.

"Bloody Hell, mate. Why do you have to ask those kinds of things?" he complained.

"So I could be clear as to which one I should recommend you to do." He replied quickly. He was very willing to help, but if Simon refuses to cooperate, then maybe he could handle it on his own.

"There's still one thing… I've been meeting with Alexandra not just for intel… " the tone of his voice was hesitant but he took a sharp inhale and continued.

"... we've also been sleeping together. No strings attached. For her it eases her tension from all the work while I try to forget about my feelings for Francine."

Gary didn't know what to say. Simon wasn't the kind of person to give up easily, and he fully understood the reasons for his latest actions.

"Well, it looks like Francine already made her choice, right?" Gary asked, trying to confirm from Simon that he already lost the battle.

"I'm not quite sure. Everytime I see her, she's physically distancing herself from Soap but later that night, they actually slept beside each other. She's making me confused and it still makes my heart beat for her…" Ghost admitted. As tough as he is on the battlefield, so was his admiration toward Francine. Gary pondered on how to help out his friend in this love triangle situation he caught himself in, but every direction he thought of would result in Ghost actually ending up sad.

The discussion was interrupted when a plane was heard from the distance, as it approached the nearby open area. It looked like the girls made it home.

"Looks like they're here." Roach sounded excited while Ghost looked worried.

~

It was impressive how they managed to bring most of their stuff from Brazil here in Scotland. It wasn't that much but the idea of packing things for six people in a hurry made Roach impressed.

"How did you bring most of this stuff?" Roach curiously asked Maxine as he helped her carry her stuff.

"Well, Samantha asked for help from his Dad and they immediately flew to Brazil." Maxine replied cheerfully, Roach loved how she managed to see the bright side of everything amidst the panic.

"So will Samantha-"

"No. They had a long talk with his Dad and she felt much safer back here with us. Her Dad wanted to offer help now that the New York Attack was over, but Samantha insisted, especially now that they're out hiding."

"Doesn't he have the power to like, pardon us for being wanted? That would make life much more easier for us."

"I thought of that too… but they're seeing Shepherd differently now. He's gone mad. And they want to corner him. Any action involving him may result in a global cripple. And I just heard all this on the plane ride here." Maxine frowned.

"Then that makes our job of locating him all worth it." Roach smiled giving hope to Maxine.

Maxine just nodded, her face was full of fear and doubt. She just wished all of this was over.

With Soap probably asleep, Roach had the liberty of touring the girls around the house, it was huge and spacious that each of them could occupy a room with about two more rooms to spare.

"Man, I could stay here forever." Roach mused as they walked the halls of the second floor. These four rooms are already occupied, most of the empty rooms are over there…" Gary pointed to the other end of the hall. Maxine looked at France and nodded as they both agreed to stay in one room.

"What about you, Miss Samantha?" Gary asked with sophistication, imitating a butler. Samantha giggled and blushed.

"I'll actually be sleeping with Alex, thanks Mr. Sanderson." she replied, playing along with Roach's role play. For a short moment, Roach felt relaxed. He hasn't felt like this for a while and it was too overwhelming. But while the enemies hid in the shadows, he was sure the team would be up for a tough fight anytime soon.

Despite being tired, Roach couldn't sleep. He felt that there was something or someone else he needed to consult. So, he decided to get up and get himself a glass of water down the kitchen. While he could hear himself gulping down a glass of water, he could also hear faint thumping from the basement. With high alert, he began descending down the stairs to investigate the source of the sound.

It was Simon. He was still up and doing sparring rounds with a red punching bag, each of his punches sent the bag swinging violently.

"You okay?" Gary finally asked, alerting Simon of his presence.

"Can't sleep." he said nonchalantly, giving the punching bag another mighty punch. Roach took a minute to admire the huge gym Soap had, each piece of equipment probably spent a fortune. He slowly paced to the small area filled with equipment and grabbed himself some boxing mitts and a protective helmet.

"So, why don't we resume our little talk?" Gary called as he presented himself to Simon on full boxing coach gear. Simon immediately positioned himself and Gary did the same as they began training with the intention of talking it out.

Simon's punches were heavy, Roach could feel a little emotion on each hit he made and it was starting to make him unstable.

"So, anything you'd want to discuss?" Roach initiated, his hands carefully met his punches as they circled around the area.

"I've been trying to ignore her, Gary. You see me try right? But the more I don't think of her, the more excited I get when I accidentally see her. It's frustrating." He explained in between his punches. There it was, the thing bothering him the most.

"What did she say back in Brazil? She probably said something that kept you from moving on. I can't think of anything else that might cause you to feel this way, unless you're lying." Roach tilted his head so he could see Simon's reaction. His punches stopped coming and he just stood there, his hands dropped to his sides.

"She… she didn't say anything… but she distances herself to John while I'm around."

"John MacTavish or John Price?" Gary interrupted, in an attempt to brighten up the mood, but instead all he got was Simon's 'are-you-kidding-me-right-now?' look.

"But when I'm not around, she finds time to see him…" Simon continued. Gary took off his gloves and tapped his shoulder.

"She… she was being considerate." Simon concluded. It looked like Gary did his job. He could feel Simon's shoulders relax upon realizing what was actually going on.

"Despite all that… she sacrificed a little just to not hurt you." Gary added, he had no intention of making Simon guilty but now that he realized it, he was making an impact toward the relationship that was blooming between Soap and France.

"Thanks, Gary. For being a great friend…" Ghost took off his gloves and walked out of the gym.

"... and the worst therapist." He joked with a grin as he walked up the stairs and left Gary in the gym.

"I hope you find your peace, Simon." Gary muttered.

The following morning, the team was already busy walking around the house. Soap was on the phone with a long list of things the girls ordered for their restock. It was planned that for the time being, the team was to stay in the MacTavish residence while Nero and Shepherd were off the grid.

Price and Jack started their own little command center inside Soap's father's office just by the living room. They began creating connections to their closest contacts to track activity from their enemies. Ghost seemed to be not around at the moment and Gary guessed he's still asleep.

Soap nodded a greeting to Roach as he walked by him on his way to the kitchen. Maxine and France were out opening drawers and anything in the pantry to clear up space for supplies. From the kitchen window, Gary spotted Samantha, Alex and Nikolai in front of a truck. Gary overheard that Nikolai wanted to go back home and he guessed today was the day he'd do so.

"I didn't know what kind of sugar you needed so I kinda ordered a bunch of em." Soap announced to the sisters and they laughed.

"The clerk kept asking me of brown, white, confectioners and some other and honestly I don't know which." he shrugged and scratched his head.

"Hey man, I was just wondering… why did you choose the risky life? When you had everything you ever needed here?" Gary asked the question that has been bothering him since he got here.

"I dunno Roach. It's just that I knew it was calling out to me… You also sound like my Mum when I told her I'm joining the force." he chuckled. Gary just nodded but still didn't understand his logic. But he dismissed the thought as soon as Maxine and France asked for his help reaching something by the cabinets.

The rest of the day was busy. Once supplies arrived, everyone else was preoccupied. Lifting boxes, arranging items, looking for intel. It was like they made their own 141 base inside the house.

By the time they're almost free, Roach and Maxine were already in the kitchen preparing for dinner.

"So, any new dreams lately?" Roach initiated as he sliced through the vegetables they're cooking.

"Piece by piece. Last night I remembered having gum stuck on my hair on picture day. I cried a lot." she giggled. Roach smiled, he was glad she's getting her memories back which made him remember of Samantha's case.

"Ow!" Gary winced as he accidentally cut a short scrape on his thumb. He was so busy staring at Maxine that he forgot he was chopping.

"Don't worry. It's just a small wound." Gary assured as Maxine pulled his thumb close to her mouth and blew air through it, just like when you're a kid and you do that to ease the pain.

Gary couldn't help but smile at her immediate action. She also looked concerned and worried about his welfare.

"Hey Max." he whispered, making the girl turn to him, her face was so beautiful in Gary's eyes.

"Is there something wrong?"

"Nothing… It's just that…"

"What is it? You're making me worried"

"I really really like you, Maxine Winters."

Maxine looked at him in the eye, the eye contact they were doing was starting to make the world fade behind them.

"Guys! I have bad news." Soap interrupted, causing everyone to form a small circle by the living room.

"Ghost left. With a note saying he'll try to gather more information on Shadow Company with Alexandra's help. He says thanks and that he'll see us all soon." Soap summarized the note. The room fell silent.

Next Chapter : Off the Grid

Notification Squad my Beloved

@samatedeansbroccoli @enderio @smokeywhalee @whimsywispsblog @beemybee @ricinbach

[jisungsmochi]

the coffee shop boy - njm

new coffee shop employee! jaemin / little rivalry b/w reader x jaemin hehe / just lots of teasing eachother and some fluff too 

some references to my jeno imagine for my nct dream job au series! 

link to my masterlist so you can read the others! 

a/n: inspired by katie & aiden’s story in ‘alexa & katie’ on netflix! pls stream it hehe 

word count: 3.9k - hope you all enjoy :) 

//

the first time you met na jaemin was in front of the cafe you worked at. your manager was running a donation drive where customers could donate toys or books for the local children’s hospital. you offered to bake complementary cookies for each person who donated. so there you were, standing outside the cafe, handing out cookies. you swore you turned away for one second, when you heard someone halt infront of the stand. the person swiftly grabbed a handful of cookies, shoving one into their mouth. you turn back around, glaring at the clueless boy infront of you.

“excuse me! those are only for people who have donated” you sternly informed, the boy still not having any sign of regret,

“my bad, i just see free cookies” he smirked, taking another bite of one. you reached to grab the others that were in his hands, but he ended up pulling away before you could reach him. you felt your body tip over the table, the plate of cookies and some donations, falling onto the ground. you loudly groan to yourself, quickly standing up and brushing off any dirt on your apron. your manager, doyoung, immediately rushed outside and to his dismay, he only saw you and a broken table with cookies scattered everywhere. the mysterious boy just took off, what an asshole.

“y/n, clean this up, now” doyoung orders, as you nod. you hoped that boy never came anywhere near the cafe ever again, or you might as well just lose it entirely.  

“and then, he grabbed the cookies and took off! if i ever see him again i want to give him a piece of my mind” you rant as your friend lia listens carefully. you were both eating lunch at a random restaurant she had heard about.

“he sounds like a dick” lia shakes her head in disappointment as you both chew on your fries.

“i know right! and now doyoung thinks i’m incapable of being assistant manager” you grunt, frustrated at the events of the day prior.

“don’t be so negative! you are a loyal employee and you are good at your job. you’ll get promoted soon, i’m sure of it” lia gives your an assuring smile, as you nod along with her. you were glad to have her by your side whenever you would rant like this, it helped you not completely lose it.

“hey! cookie girl!” you heard a sudden voice echo through the restaurant. both you and lia turned to the voice calling you, only to be met with the boy from yesterday.

“you’ve got to be kidding me” you groaned, putting on a small, fake smile to greet to boy.

“fancy seeing you here, stalking me now right?” he chuckled to himself, approaching your table. lia looked over at you with a ‘what the hell?’ expression, you just widened your eyes, unsure of how to respond to either of them.

“whatever helps you sleep at night” you respond, as jaemin just smirks.

“sorry about the cookies by the way. don’t get offended but, they weren’t that good to begin with” he slyly poked at you. you wanted to give him a good lecture about how hard you worked on those damn cookies but you noticed how lia was getting concerned about your next moves. you took a deep breath before giving the boy another blunt answer,

“you’re entitled to your own wrong opinion. now may you please leave me and my friend alone?” you just shot another fake smile, as jaemin couldn’t take his eyes off you. you started feeling repulsed by just his gaze, why did he have to stare for such long periods of time?

“sure thing, see you around” he winks before heading out of the restaurant.

“who the hell was that? is he the cookie thief?!” lia’s mouth was agape as you nodded.

“he was indeed. i just want to wipe that grin off his face!” you cross your arms in frustration. lia just rolls her eyes,

“he’s kinda cute, don’t you think?” she starts to wiggle her eyebrows as you throw a fry at her.

“you have a boyfriend!” you begin to tease as she starts blushing,

“jeno doesn’t need to know” she jokes as you both begin laughing.

(a/n: yes the jeno here is from the bubble tea girl au hehe) 

you were happy that lia had a boyfriend, but it often made you feel distant from her. you felt like you couldn’t ask her to hang out as much, incase she had plans with jeno. you knew that she would have dropped everything to hang out with you, but you still felt guilty if she ditched jeno like that. you wished that you had a boyfriend of your own, so you could hang out all together without the awkward third wheel vibe. but that was a long shot for you, or so you thought.

//

it had been a solid two weeks since that interaction with jaemin, in which you still didn't know his name yet. after constant hassling, doyoung promoted you to assistant manager.

"we have a new employee coming in today, i need you to train him" doyoung orders as you nod in agreement.

"never fear! i'll teach him everything in my barista 101 guide!" you smile, pulling out a pastel green notebook with random coloured tabs sticking out of it.

"i didn't ask, but you do you" doyoung shrugs, patting your shoulder before heading to the back room. doyoung always picked on you, but you were sure, you were his favourite employee.

you were fixing up any last notes in your guide, when you heard the bell above the door ring. you set everything aside, ready to take the next order. you look up, eyes meeting those of the boy you never wanted to see again.

"you" you huff out, eyes immediately glaring, face now stone cold.

"me" jaemin smiled widely, walking up to the counter, leaning his elbows on the top of it.

"fall on any more tables yet?" he chuckled to himself as you mimicked his words, turning away from him to continue writing in your book. he had some nerve teasing you like that.

"y/n, what are you doing? this is jaemin, the new employee" doyoung bursted out of the backroom, standing behind you. you instantly froze, looking over to jaemin who was now standing up straight with his arms crossed over his chest. he had bright blue hair, a blue denim jacket on, and that damn smirk of his plastered on his face. you couldn't stop glaring, slowing moving to face jaemin and doyoung.

"just train him well okay? i don't want to have to deal with any mess in here" doyoung sighed, walking away from the both of you. jaemin had his eyes fixed on you.

"you know just cause you're cute and all, doesn't mean this job is going to be easy" you muttered as you dig behind the counter to find jaemin a spare apron.

"oh so you think i'm cute?" you could hear the flirtatious tone leaving his mouth. you shot up from behind the counter and threw the apron forcefully at his face. to your displeasure, he ended up catching it before it could hit him. jaemin tied the apron on himself, meeting you behind the counter.

"let's get started shall we. i have written pretty much everything you need to learn in this book right here! it's a beginner's guide, with all my best tips and tricks so i-" you were interrupted by jaemin fiddling with the coffee machine, not paying attention to a single word that left your mouth. you groaned in annoyance, watching as he handed you the cup of coffee he had just made.

"try it" he urged you, observing your every move. you cautiously look at him and then at the cup in your hands. you didn't want to admit it, but it looked and smelled pretty good. you slowly took a sip of the warm drink, eyes avoiding those of jaemin. you hated to compliment him, but the boy had some skills. you felt jaemin's eyes on you, ready for your verdict.

"it's alright i guess" you sigh, trying to play off how impressed you were. jaemin just chuckled, knowing he was already doing a good job.

"i don't need that little book of yours, i think i'm just about perfect" you rolled your eyes at the taller boy, giving him a small slap on the shoulder.

"get to work buddy, tables need some wiping and coffees need to be made" you made your way to the cash register, beginning to take orders as customers entered the shop. jaemin couldn't help but shake his head at your bossy persona. he found it entertaining, but also quite enticing. he couldn't wait to work with you more.

//

weeks had passed since jaemin started working at the coffee shop. he never asked for any of your help, making you quite frustrated that he wouldn't even listen to a single piece of advice you had. it's as if your authority as assistant manager and his trainer, was thrown out the window. you were getting ready to start your shift, noticing jaemin drawing something on the front window with some paint pens.

"what the hell are you doing? doyoung hates it when we mess with the window art!" you nag at the blue haired boy. jaemin just rolls his eyes, turning back at you,

"can you like stop nagging me for one minute?" he responds, continuing to draw on the window. you let out a small huff, and as if on cue, doyoung approaches both of you.

"ooo you're in troubleee" you slyly mutter, waiting for the scene to unfold. jaemin turns to face doyoung, who at first didn't say a word.

"jaemin, i didn't give you permission to do this" doyoung started, you felt yourself perk up at the possibility of jaemin getting scolded.

"but i was kind of wanting a new design anyway, your doodles are quite nice actually. keep it up" doyoung smiles, looking over at your pissed off expression. he just pats your shoulder before heading off to do business of his own.

"you can't bust me, sweetie. i'm just that good" jaemin walks closer to you, backing your up against the counter.

"you are so infuriating" you grunt through your teeth, eyes meeting jaemin’s. he had a slight kindness in his eyes. as if he was pleading for you to not to be so mad at him. jaemin chuckled softly,

"you're gonna just have to deal with it then" he leaves you stunned as he walked behind the counter, starting to take orders.

was he always this handsome?

you shook your head from your thoughts, na jaemin was utterly unbearable to be around, so why couldn't you stop thinking about him?

//

"you know what he did the other day?" you begin another rant, this time lia and jeno were your audience.

"what did he do?" lia played along, looking over at jeno who was invested in your story.

"so, you know suzy? the dreaded middle aged woman who always complains about her coffee having too much sugar? yeah well, jaemin served her the other day and she complimented him! right infront of me!" you started to pout. lia started giggling causing jeno to start giggling as well.

"what's so funny?" you furrow your eyebrows at the couple.

"doesn't sound like you hate him all that much to me" jeno smirked, wiggling his eyebrows at you. you just give him a scowl in return.

"no you see jeno, y/n hides her feelings for jaemin through all this teasing, and so does he. it’s adorable" lia commented, causing you to know scowl at her.

"you guys are being ridiculous! he is so infuriating, no one can be that perfect at making coffees? especially a beginner anyway" you continue being stubborn as your friends just roll their eyes, already convinced you were in complete and utter denial.

you went home that day, thinking back to the times you felt yourself stare a bit too long at jaemin. he was so charismatic, he could practically charm any person who entered the shop. he had doyoung, the most stone cold person you had met, wrapped around his finger. he was the perfect barista, and could even do coffee art. you envied how good he was, considering it took you months to perfect your own skills. you knew that hating jaemin wasn't the way to handle this whole situation, but it was much easier than having him know that you sort of liked him.

//

you were writing down stuff in your weekly planner, it helped you stay organised with your daily tasks so you knew you wouldn’t forget anything. well, except your pastel green notebook. you swore you had left it at work, but for the past week you hadn’t been able to find it. you were slowly starting to accept that you lost it, and all your hard work over the past 6 months was for nothing. you let a soft groan, finishing up your final sentence, as you heard the boy next to you clear his throat.

“may i help you?” you move your head to face him, not realising he was already inches close to you. you immediately froze, unsure of what to do next.

“you’re slacking off, i can’t make all these coffees on my own”  jaemin smirked, like he had many times before but this time, you couldn’t help but admire how handsome he was up close.

“i- well uh, yeah sorry” you stuttered, pulling away from the boy. jaemin just sighed, he didn’t understand why it was so hard to talk to you. he wanted to get close to you, possibly even ask you out, but your repeated attempts to ignore him during your shifts together had deflated his confidence. you caught yourself glancing over at him multiple times during work, watching how he interacted so kindly with customers and somehow always kept his composure when being lectured by doyoung.

you were about to close up, making sure to double check that the bathrooms were clean. as you made your way back to the counter, you caught jaemin in the act. he was reading from your notebook. the one you thought you had lost. he didn’t see you approaching, making it an even better bust.

“AHA! i knew it! you read my book” you exclaimed, catching the boy off guard, causing him to fall into his butt. you couldn’t help but laugh at his exaggerated reaction, before helping him from behind the counter.

“it’s not what it looks like” he just sighs, knowing he had already been caught.

“oh really? cause it looks like you were reading my book, and have possibly been following every single piece of advice in it” you continued to tease, a bright smile plastered on your face. jaemin couldn’t help but crack a smile back at you, nodding in defeat.

“yes okay, i read your book. it helped a lot! is that what you wanna hear?” jaemin could feel the redness flush his cheeks and the tops of his ears. you couldn’t help but gush over how hilarious the situation was.

“and here i was, thinking you were a barista prodigy! well na jaemin, you just got schooled!” you started getting up in his face, watching as the taller boy just shook his head at your incredibly quirky antics. he found you adorable, not that he would admit it anytime soon.

from that day onwards, you and jaemin bickered less. of course you’d still poke fun at him now and then for initially taking your book, but it was all fun and games.

“y/n look!” you heard him call, as you were both closing up that night. jaemin had smeared on a foam moustache on his face, attempting to make you laugh. you just threw a dirty towel at him, rolling your eyes at us childish antics.

“god you’re such a loser” you smile softly, removing your apron. jaemin wipes off the foam, placing the towel away, before removing his own apron.

“you know, i think that all this teasing from you, is really a way for you to hide how much you like me” his words made you freeze. you didn’t want to face him. you weren’t sure if he was kidding or not, so you opted to just crack another witty comment, to avoid any more awkwardness.

“in your dreams, i do it because you’re just easy to make fun of. it’s what friends do” you shrug, looking over at the blue haired boy. you were expecting atleast a small smile to come from jaemin, but instead, he had an unreadable expression. he approached you slowly, causing you to shuffle backwards, your back now pressing against one of the cupboards behind the counter. jaemin places his right hand next to your head, leaning closer to you. you felt your breath hitch as he stared into your eyes. jaemin didn’t want to keep beating around the bush, he needed to know how you felt, and soon.

“ so you’re telling me, we are just friends?” he mumbles, quiet enough for only you to hear. you could practically feel him begging for you to deny it, but your heart wasn’t sure if you were completely in it. of course you found jaemin attractive, who wouldn’t? but to be in a relationship or even start something more than a friendship, with anyone was a huge step for you. you had never had a boyfriend before, and watching your friends experience immense heartbreaks in the past, made you unsure of your own experiences.

“y-yeah jaemin, we’re just friends” you whisper, watching as jaemin’s face softens. you didn’t know if he was upset, hurt, or both. but you knew something was off. jaemin just nodded, packing up his things.

“have a nice night, y/n” jaemin gave you a small wave before exiting the coffee shop. you felt your heart tighten, what the hell was he doing to you?

//

“y/n, i’m your best friend and all, but you’re an idiot. jaemin clearly likes you and you have just ruined your chances!” lia sighs, comforting you the next day. you just nod, knowing everything she said was true.

“i know i messed up. i just don’t want to get his hopes up if i’m a shit girlfriend or something” you worry, unsure whether you could really show jaemin the appreciation as love he deserved.

“stop being so afraid! don’t stay sheltered! if you like him, you should tell him. you deserve to be in a happy relationship, never doubt that” lia pulls you in for a long hug and you begin t think about what you wanted to say to jaemin, the next time you saw him. you knew she was right. if you didn’t confess soon, it would eat at you inside about what could have been. it was time to take a chance.

//

at your next shift at the coffee shop, jaemin came in late. he apologised to doyoung who didn’t mind, as today was fairly slow. he would usually shoot a witty comment at you before he started making drinks, but today he just gave you a small smile without a single word. your heart clenched at how he was acting. but you knew exactly why he was doing it. you wanted to wait until closing time, to properly talk with jaemin. but you couldn’t help but notice how down he looked whilst he was serving customers. it really must have affected him a lot. you tried to talk to him during your shift, standing next to him as he was making a drink.

“h-hey, how are you?” you tried to start, watching as jaemin halts his movements. he turned his head to face you, the expression was unreadable. jaemin knew he was being petty for giving you the cold shoulder. it wasn’t like he could have forced you to like him back, especially since he hadn’t properly right out confessed to you.

“i-i’m alright, and you?” he tried to act as normal and nonchalant as possible.

“i’m okay i guess” you mumble, unsure of how to continue. you were thankful that jaemin had to serve more customers, cutting your conversation short.

you waited for the clock to strike 9:30pm, as it was time to start closing up. doyoung tossed you the keys before he finished his shift earlier that day, leaving both you and jaemin to pack up together. jaemin had finished cleaning the bathrooms and all the tables as you worked on the countertops and back area. you made eye contact with him from across the room. he looked so solemn, as if he would rather be anywhere else but here with you. you sighed to yourself, knowing what was on his mind. you approached the blue haired boy slowly. he watched your every move, his heart beat increasing with every step you took.

“i lied” you blurt out as his eyes furrowed, confused at your words.

“when you asked me if i thought we were just friends. i lied. i don’t think of you as just a friend, jaemin. i-i think of you as something more” you avoid his eyes, watching as he sets down the dirty towels onto the nearest table. he pulls your chin up with his fingers, making sure you were looking at him directly.

“why didn’t you just say so?” he had that cocky smirk on again, which would have drove you nuts before, but now you found really attractive.

“i was in denial, okay? i didn’t know if you really liked me back or not and i guess i was just scared about what to do next” you admitted, as jaemin’s lips formed a small pout.

“you drive me crazy” jaemin smiled, cupping the side of your face with his left hand, softly caressing your cheek with his thumb.

“well so do you” you mumbled while blushing.

“just so you can hear me say it, i like you too. kinda have been trying to drop hints. you’re completely oblivious” he playfully teased, causing you to give him a small shove. you couldn’t help but smile at him as he pulled your face closer to his with both his hands on your cheeks. you move your hands to wrap around his neck, watching as his smile widened.

“bold move there” he muttered, lips brushing briefly over yours.

“can you just kiss me already?” you whine, which made jaemin’s heart burst. he nodded eagerly before connecting your lips with his. he moved one hand to grab your waist and the other was left caressing your cheek. you couldn’t believe you were kissing the same guy who stole your cookies months ago.

jaemin suddenly pulls away, mumbling,

“i knew you’d fall for me, i mean i am a catch”

“you really know how to ruin a moment don’t you?” you pull away from his completely, letting his take his hand in yours.

“yeah but we have a lot of time to have more moments, won’t we?” jaemin pulls you to his side,

“we sure will” you smile up at him, leaning in for another kiss when you were interrupted by a familiar voice,

“i freaking knew it! you two better not do this lovey dovey stuff during your shift otherwise i’m firing one of you” doyoung warmed as you both burst into laughter.

you didn’t know what you were getting yourself into with jaemin. but that was the thrill of it all. he was constantly surprising you with new things about himself. you completely adored him, as he did with you. you realised it was okay to let yourself be vulnerable, you never know what you could get out of it.

a/n: ahhh i loved writing this one! let me know if there were any mistakes! x 

[ma-gic-gay]

"What the fuck?" Michael asks, voice at a dangerous level. He startles them and they pull apart. "You two promised me you're not in a relationship, so what do you call this?"

They've been caught.

Shit.

"Kissing," Carly answers quickly, half lying and half telling the truth. "We're not dating."

"Then please explain to me what this is, Mom," he asks. "You too, Jason."

"Explain what?" Joss asks, walking into the room.

"They kissed."

"Avery owes me 5 bucks now," the blonde smiles. "I can buy a coffee with that money."

"Great, a free coffee. Are you at all having an emotional reaction to Mom and Jason kissing?" Michael asks his sister, who's ignoring him.

"Not my business who Mom and Jason kiss," she responds calmly.

When did she get so grown up? She had her "child of the corn" years a few years ago, but now she's an adult and not freaking out over this? His goddaughter's all grown up. One hell of a way to make you feel old.

"I can't believe you're so calm about this, Joss! They lied to us!"

"Did they? They said they weren't dating. First off, that's a present tense which could've changed, and they didn't say anything about kissing in hospitals," she says, confused.

"Here's that first aid kit for Jason, Carly," Elizabeth says, entering the tense room and handing it to the traumatized woman in the hospital bed. "Do you two need something?"

"My mother to figure out what the hell she feels for Jason Morgan," Michael answers bitterly.

"I'm not going to ask."

"They kissed! And they did it yesterday!" Michael exclaims, emotions getting the best of him before he can remember his tact.

Everyone's shocked he screamed that, Elizabeth especially. "Well. Um, I'm gonna head out. You guys enjoy... Whatever this is."

That's one way for it to come out.

"It's out in the open now," Carly chuckles, opening up the first aid kit and pulling out the bandages, hydrogen peroxide, and Neosporin.

"Mom, what are you doing with his hand?"

"He punched a wall so I'm cleaning up the cuts."

"Why'd you do that?"

"People were gossipping about your mother and what happened to her tonight. It pissed me off and I ended up punching a wall."

"By the looks of it you broke the wall."

"Nah, just a few scratches," Jason tells him before the stinging sensation of the hydrogen peroxide is on his hand. Not exactly a pleasant one.

"Well, are you okay?"

"Besides the fact your mother is stinging me with this stuff, I'm fine."

"Good. What happened to you tonight, Mom?" Michael asks gingerly.

Suddenly, the tension in the air amplifies by 50 if that's even possible. There's a good minute and a half where it's just an awkward silence before Carly answers him, filling the time with applying bandaids to his wounds, "Cyrus took me from the Metro Court. Well, one of his goons. But the goon took me to the Floating Rib, that little room above the bar. Somehow he knew the importance of that place to me and I was kidnapped. He raped me. I also got pretty beat up when I was resisting. Just when I was sure I'd never leave that room, Jason came in and saved me. Cyrus is in police custody right now and there's no way in hell he's getting off."

"He always saves all of us," Joss smiles at him. "Thanks."

"Anytime. I'll always save you guys, you know that," Jason returns her smile and sees one appear on Michael's face as well, though he's half ready to kill someone. It always happens when someone brings up rape, Michael gets distant and mad. Probably because of his own experience with it.

It's a good thing Cyrus is in police custody because if he wasn't, Jason has a feeling that he'd end up helping them cover up a murder.

"Mom, I'm so sorry you had to go through it. Cyrus is a sick bastard. You know that I'll be able to pull some strings and all of the Quartermaine's will testify in your behalf if you need to go to trial," Michael offers.

"Thanks, but I'm hoping he'll plead guilty and I won't have to sit through a trial."

"Well, if you do, you've got the best lawyer in the state on your side and all of us," Joss says, "besides, there's a bunch of evidence he did it. And everyone knows Jason's practically incapable of lying, so he'll be a great witness!"

"You, on the other hand, are a good liar, Joss," Michael counters.

"The law doesn't know that, Michael."

"I better never get a call I have to bail you out of jail."

"I'll call Cam or Trina. You'll be last on the list of people I'd call to bail me out, trust me," she playfully reassures her brother.

"Is that an insult or a compliment?"

"You pick."

"I'm sorry, but Mrs. Corinthos cannot have visitors anymore," Epiphany tells them, interrupting the group gathering.

Sadly, her kids say goodbye to her, promising to visit in the morning. Jason, however, doesn't leave his chair. "Mr. Morgan, did you hear me? No more visitors. Visiting hours are over."

"I'm family."

"So are her children. They don't get to stay the night, neither do you."

"I need him to stay. When I sleep, I keep having nightmares- screaming, terrifying nightmares, and he's the only one who can get me back to sleep. Come on, Epiphany, you know we always spend the night in each other's hospital rooms," Carly attempts to bargain with the nurse.

"And if this were normal circumstances, I would allow it."

"What about this isn't normal circumstances?" Jason asks.

"Well, first off, Michael told Elizabeth about your... Activity. And second, this is a police investigation too. Hospital policy says that he can't stay the night."

"Oh my god," Carly scoffs, "because my son discussed something with us that Lizzie overheard and then spread to the whole town by now, he can't spend the night? Epiphany, I've given myself panic attacks with these nightmares already and he's been here! He's the only person who can calm me down and I know how important rest is for recovery. Besides, it's not like we have no self control. I would never have sex in a hospital."

Epiphany cocks an eyebrow at Jason, who innocently raises his hands. "You know me better than that."

Carly starts laughing at him being stared down by Epiphany, who he simply stated blankly at back. It's a contest of who's going to back down first, and they all know he'll win. His stubbornness is one personality trait that always comes out in hospitals.

"Fine. But I swear, if you two go at it, there will be hell to pay," Epiphany threatens before leaving, letting Jason stay in there. A win. "And she cannot stay up all night making out with you, she needs her rest. So do you, you look like hell."

"Yes ma'am," they answer and she shakes her head before closing the door.

"I feel like I'm in high school again," Carly jokes.

"No clue what that's like."

"Hell, if you're me. You, though, I bet you were that one kid all the teachers loved and the students too. A golden boy. I'm convinced you would've hated me in high school."

"Well, I wouldn't have remembered it anyways," he reminds her.

"Nah, I'm unforgettable," she says, a smirk playing on her lips. "Even with an amnesia causing coma."

"That's not how it-" he gets cut off by her kissing him again.

This is becoming more and more normal and that scares him. He's comfortable in his reality and, as usual, she's ready to bring Hurricane Carly into his life and break his equilibrium.

Well, that and the thought she could make another of those lists. The list scares him more than breaking this state of equilibrium.

"We promised Epiphany we wouldn't do this," he reminds her when they break apart.

"No, we promised her I'd rest and that we wouldn't stay up all night kissing or have sex," Carly corrects.

"Yes, you need your rest, Carly. Please, try to sleep," he urges.

"I'm offended!"

"Carly-"

"You have a guy telling you you're wrong and shut him up and now you've got to sleep. God how times have changed."

"No, it's not that. You, however, need your sleep. Besides, if you have a nightmare, I promise you can kiss me again," he finds himself saying.

Well. That part was unexpected. He really needs a reevaluation of feelings for her.

"Well, if his Royal Highness-"

"I'll kiss you if you have a nightmare, alright?" Jason revises his statement and she smiles.

"Deal."

"Good, you need to rest."

"So do you."

"Just worry about yourself, I'm fine."

"Mhm," she haphazardly agrees, allowing herself to fall back into a slumber while he shifts in the chair he's mastered the ability of sleeping in over the years.

To be continued later in life when it's not 1:30 am est

go to sleep :)

[malexfan10]

Malex thoughts

I was watching some old episodes of Dawson's Creek and it made me want to get some thoughts out. I watched a lot of TV shows growing up. For me, the couples I liked were either ones I casually rooted for or on the rare occasion, a couple took me by such surprise that I became extremely emotionally invested. Malex is the latter.

I've been a fan of Captain Swan (OUAT), Stydia (Teen Wolf), Kurt & Blaine (Glee), Buffy & Angel and lots more. The rare pairings I've been completely lost on, I can name on one hand. Pacey & Joey (my first OTP), Chandler & Monica and Malex. I'd say Destiel on Supernatural too but with them, everything is subtext. I don't think the writers will have the guts to go there, not even with the show ending.

With PJ, I love how they started as antagonists, became really great friends, and then fell in love. For me, PJ vs DJ was incomparable. DJ brought out the worst in each other (my opinion) while PJ showed each other what love was supposed to be. The only thing I hated about DC was the constant back & forth between the two pairings. It lasted until the final moment when you realized PJ was endgame (one of my fears for Malex). I hated that but I was a kid so it didn't bother me as much as it would now.

I loved Chandler & Monica because they started out as friends who fell in love, got married and had all the moments in between before adopting a set of twins. I loved their story because it showed their entire journey. True, the show was a comedy but their story didn't end in season 5 when they started dating. Their story just began.

It's hard understanding writers who feel that only the journey matters. Of course it does. The journey is important. It's what makes you root for a couple but the destination and what happens after is important too. It makes you continue rooting for them, seeing all that angst and pain amounting to something substantial in the end.

So as much as I loved PJ, the fact that they kept us guessing until the last 5 minutes before we realized who she chose was too much. The long, drawn out, multi-season, will they/won't they storytelling style is one I'll never be a fan of.

Which leads me to Malex.

They were two broken boys, both brought up under horrible circumstances, who found the missing piece of themselves in each other. When Alex gave Michael a warm and safe place to stay, it was probably the first act of true kindness Michael had ever experienced and it was made by a boy whose pain and suffering mirrored his own. How incredibly heartbreaking but beautiful is that? That initial bond, that "cosmic" connection stood the test of time. Separated for 10 years and it felt like no time had passed at all.

That first moment in the pilot episode outside his Airstream, you could feel the tension. I remember reading interpretations of that scene. People thought Malex were cold and angry with one another "probably over a girl". Are you kidding me? That tension could only be romantic. But that first kiss at the reunion was when I hopped on the Malex Forever train. One stop only. Endgame.

They set them up so amazingly in the first three episodes. The angst was there but you could also feel the deep love between them. They weren't shown as two guys who had a fling back in high school and then crossed paths again 10 years later, said what the hell and hooked up again. No, they were shown as soulmates. Their level of connection even scared and confused them but they both knew it existed. Their love was pure and true and rare.

With all their history and with so many odds already stacked against them, the writers deciding to throw in a triangle just because they could and doing it in such a rushed and messy way really made me scratch my head.

Carina said she loved the triangle on DC. I honestly think she was the only one. That show was incredibly divided, DJ vs PJ. But as much as I hated the constant back and forth, I'll give the DC writers some credit. Joey's feelings for both were fully touched on. I saw her romantic feelings for Pacey more profound and her feelings for Dawson as true friendship (just my opinion), but both sides were shown in depth.

The problem with Roswell? Where did those feelings come from between M&M? They shared a moment when Maria cried and I took that as the start of a wonderful friendship. I was obviously wrong. They hooked up in the desert. OK I hated it but they were two single people and Maria didn't know about Alex so I accepted. All of a sudden, the feelings were real and Maria was conflicted because of how strong her feelings were. Michael chose to be with Maria because he needed something fresh and new and according to the wonderful Vlamis, someone he also had strong feelings for (still hate that last interview LOL).

I understand where Michael was coming from a little better, as much as I hate it and hate how he went about it by leaving Alex just waiting. He'd been through so much trauma and Max and Isobel kept telling him to stop looking to the past (which, really Max? If someone told you that about Liz, would you listen?? But he died so he gets a pass). But as far as Maria's feelings are concerned, I feel like I missed something.

Between episodes 9 and 10, did the M&M feelings bloom overnight from flirty banter to crush to "OMG this is love"? Was their moment in the desert that mind-blowing that the weirdness of episode 11 happened? I don't get it.

The one thing going against M&M is that Malex is overwhelmingly loved and has been embraced by fans and critics alike.

One critic said it best when they reviewed the finale (Vulture).

"I was intrigued by the possibility of Michael/Maria at first, but the love triangle has been so rushed — with so little time spent on Maria’s developing feelings for Michael — that it’s ended up just making her look terrible. We know from Maria’s conversation with Liz that she hasn’t even spoken to Alex about the situation because she feels too guilty, and so having her accept Michael with open arms is such an odd note. Sure, she doesn’t know Alex is waiting for Michael right at the same moment, but she does know that he’s been in love with Michael for a decade."

And therein lies the problem. A lifelong friendship ruined over a guy (unless Carina makes Alex give his blessing next season which would really make me scream) to push forward a pairing that had little development and makes Maria look bad. One side of the triangle is Michael's soulmate and the other side is the friend with sudden feelings. Not the best character development which is sad because we know how awesome Maria can be and as mad as I am with her, her character that I enjoyed until episode 10 and the actress deserve better. But instead of being original, the writers chose the path always taken. They chose to use her as the odd end of a triangle where, unless they want everyone to hate the show, she will likely be the one forced out so Malex can eventually reunite and for what? Drama?

Season 1 started out really strong and it still had a lot of strong moments in the latter episodes (end scene of episode 9 between Malex, Liz & Jenna being kickass in episode 11, all of episode 12 - my fave of the season, Kyle's confrontation with Jesse etc).

But honestly, I feel like the inclusion of this triangle (amongst other reveals like Noah as the 4th alien) somewhat brought the story down. The writing for M&M felt OOC and was messily done.

Only in recent years have LGBT pairings started becoming more mainstream, given better development and importance in the overall story. With Malex, they have the potential of making Michael and Alex one of the greatest love stories on TV. As much as I love the show, I'm not saying Roswell is on the same level as Breaking Bad or The Sopranos etc. But from all the pairings on the show, Malex is the most profound and has the potential to go down as one of the best on TV. To overcome everything they've been through and still choose each other and their love would be the ultimate happy ending because unlike most male/female pairings that go through mostly regular angst, being two males in a small town, Malex have a whole other level of obstacles to face. That doesn't even include their personal history, the fact that Michael is an alien or that Alex's father is the cause of so much pain between them. Or the fact that Alex is a disabled war veteran. I mean, there is so much amazing points to their story. They are the OTP of OTPs.

But so far, it feels like the triangle is the only major roadblock the writers want to concentrate on and that's the biggest mistake of all.

Season 2 hasn't aired yet. We don't know how little (🤞) or how long (😢) M&M will last. We'll just have to wait and see how it goes and hope that Twitter Carina is not the same as Season 2 showrunner Carina.

But for me, Malex will always be each other's endgame. That's what I saw in the first 3 episodes. That's what I saw in the flashbacks. That's what I saw in Caulfield. Try and convince me differently, show. You'll fail.

❤

[sweetmusingss]

I sigh softly when hearing what you said. "Look at what happened to us from me doing this last musical.. I don't want anything affecting our relationship. I don't want to lose you, Sebastian. If I did this, it would keep me pretty busy, too. And what if I am not good enough? I just don't want to let anyone down. Most of all, you," I say, frowning slightly. "I-I really miss you..," I say, not having said that out loud for a while now, trying to hide how I really felt. "But, I am afraid that if I miss you too much or I show it too much, you are just going to feel guilty and you shouldn't. This is your job and I support you completely. I just want to spend the week in Romania with you and I will think more about the upcoming musical then, okay? It's a big decision and I just want to be able to do a good job with it."

"My paranoia from the other day has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with me. Like you said, that guy is married... who the hell am I to get mad at that? Stop blaming yourself, Katie." He sighs, hating how he couldn't even be happy for you because you were already second-guessing yourself. "It's okay to miss me. In what world do you think I'm going to love you more if you pretend not to miss me? That's so backwards. I want you to miss me, I miss you more than anything... you can miss someone and not guilt them by doing so. You don't make me feel guilty because you miss me, babe. That's insane. I know I have to be here, this is my job, I'll never feel guilty for doing my job. I feel guilty for you being alone, but I also know that this is how it is too... You need to do that audition for Waitress. You just have too, there's no debate there."

__

Emma was surprised by Megan's words, figuring this must have been another one of your rules. She wondered if there was a reason behind it and that maybe you didn't want Megan to get too drunk. "I like tequila, too. Beer was always my favorite drink but then I came to love wine..," she said, her mind flashing back to you. It was funny how Regina could never get her on wine but you could. Even after you had broken up, she ended up drinking a glass of wine here and there and thinking of you each time that she did. "But piña coladas are what I am going to stick with for today, too," she said, ordering two for her and Megan before setting the seashell on the bar in front of her.

Regina laughed from your question, shaking her head before sitting down near you on her own towel. "Your guess is about as good as mine. Sometimes, I think you know Emma even better than I do. The girl can be unpredictable sometimes. But, Megan is really likeable and Emma is the only one she hasn't won over yet. But maybe Emma will end up succumbing to her charms. Do you want them to be close?," she asked you, curious how you felt. She had probed Emma a bit earlier and now it was your turn.

"I like wine too but only at fancy dinners and stuff. Renee likes wine but I don't know, I like other drinks more. She has gotten me into white wine though, a little bit." She scrunches her nose as Emma orders for the two of them, thanking her before tilting her head as she looks up at Emma. "You think I'm weird don't you? You're trying to figure me out, right?" Her tone wasn't mean or accusatory at all, just looking up at her. "You either wanna figure me out or you're trying to make Renee like you more by getting close to me..."

"You don't even know unpredictable until you spend a weekend with Megan... but I know what you mean. Emma is unpredictable in a different, worse way." I giggle, sipping my pina colada. I shrug at Regina's question, not really sure what my answer was. "Megan asks about her a lot... it's just too hard for me to go into. So, maybe I do want them to get to know one another so she stops asking? I don't think I'd want them becoming best friends and visiting each other for my own selfish reasons, but I don't think it's a bad thing for them to get to know each other... while we're here." I bite my lip and sigh, "Megan said Killian was all over her... is that normal for him? Like, are they in an open relationship or something?"

[d-noona]

MAKE OVER

Chapter 2: Librarian the seductress

Jung Hoseok x Reader

Reader as Kang Hyeonji

SUMMARY: When Kang Hyeonji transformed herself into a striking redhead, the entire male population of Seoul stood up and took notice. But her make over was for Jung Hoseok’s benefit alone. He began to show interest in the new look but not in the way she wanted. Suddenly he was over-protective, perhaps a little jealous. It seemed that the idea of having a relationship with her couldn’t be further from his mind. The girl however wants more. So it was time for an ultimatum. If Hoseok didn’t want Hyeonji to lose her virginity to another admirer, he had no option but to make love to her himself.

Hyeonji was standing at the library computer, running the wand over the first of the huge pile of returned books, when something caught her eye. Something bright and red. She glanced up through the glass door to see a shiny red car turning its brand-new nose into the empty parking space right outside the library. It brought no flash of recognition, despite being a memorable model. Not quite a sports car, it was stills stylish and expensive looking. A newcomer to the area, no doubt. Not knowing that this particular library branch was closed to the public on Wednesday morning. Hyeonji was about to return to the job at hand when the driver's door opened and a heart-jolting familiar head of hair came into view, gleaming under the summer sun.

Hoseok.

Her heart leaped. So he had remembered her birthday. He'd even come in person. She could hardly believe it. Her happiness knew no bounds as she watched him close the car and stride up onto the pavement and across to the front doors. He smiled at her through the grass as he tapped on the wooden frame.

"Can't they see were closed?" Choon Hee complained from where she was sitting at her desk, flipping through one of the new publisher catalogs. She could not see who was knocking. If she had, she would not be so anxious to send the unwanted visitor away. Min Choon Hee might be happily married to her husband Min Yoongi with three children, but she still had an eye for a good-looking man.

Hoseok was just that –and more. At twenty five, he was in his physical prime, his elegant body in perfect tune with his handsome face. His height was no joke either, his lean frame made him look even taller, and did his choice of clothing. In winter they range from soft suede numbers to tweedy sports coats. In summer he chose linen or lightweight wool in neutral colors, and teamed them with cool T-shirts. Ties rarely graced his neck. In fact, Hyeonji had never seen Hoseok dressed formally.

Today he was wearing stonewashed blue jeans, a navy shirt and a loose cream jacket with sleeves pushed up to his elbows. His black hair was longer than when she'd seen him last, falling to his ears from its side parting and flopping with its usual rakish charm across his high forehead. He looked slightly wind-blown and utterly gorgeous. Hyeonji immediately put her "moving on" decision on hold for a good seven years. Thirty, she decided a new, was soon enough to give up all hope. The fact that Hoseok was standing where he was at this very moment had to give her some hope. Fancy him abandoning his precious business on a working day to drive this long from Seoul to Gwangju, just to see her on her birthday.

"For pity's sake!" Choon Hee snapped when Hoseok knocked a second time. "Can't they read? The library times are on the darned door!"

"It's someone I know," Hyeonji said. "I'll just go let him in." Choon Hee jumped from her sit "But it's almost..." The sight of Hoseok's handsome-self stopped her in her tracks. "Mmm, yes by all means let him in," she murmured, primping her glossy black straight hair as Hyeonji hurried out from behind the reception desk across the functional grey carpet. Hyeonji wasn't worried that Hoseok would find Choon Hee attractive. As pretty as she was, she was a married woman. Hoseok believed in keeping his sex life simple.

"One girl at a time," he'd once confided in Hyeonji. "And never anyone else's."

It was surprisingly conservative attitude in this day and age, especially coming from a man who looked like Hoseok, who had women throwing themselves at him all the time. He had a similarly strict attitude to marriage. Only one per lifetime, which was why he'd always say he would not bother with marriage till he was in his thirties and financially secure. He didn't want to make a mistake in finding his partner.

"In the meantime," he joked to her one day, "I'm having a lot of fun auditioning possible future candidates for the position of Mrs. Jung Hoseok." It had always terrified Hyeonji that one of those future candidates might capture Hoseok's love as well as his lust. Fortunately, that hadn't happened, and Hyeonji had taken heart from the failure of his various very beautiful girlfriends to last more than a few months. But his latest was a bit of a worry. A statuesque brunette who went by the name Tinashe, she'd already lasted six months –a record for Hoseok. He'd even brought her home with him for Christmas break, during which time Hyeonji had many opportunities to see Tinashe's assets. What she could do for a bikini was incomparable.

But I'm not going to think about Tinashe right now, Hyeonji told herself as she turned the key and swept the open door. Today is my birthday and my very best friend has come to celebrate it with me. "Hoseok!" she exclaimed, smiling up into his dancing brown eyes. "Hi there, Hyeonji. Sorry to interrupt. I know you're working but I simply had to show you my new car. Picked it up this morning at one of those dealerships just the other side of town and couldn't resist taking it for a spin. Before I knew it I was on the express way headed here. I thought what the hell Hoseok? You haven't had a day off in ages. Drive up to Gwangju and visit your Mom."

He smiled a sheepish smile, showing perfect teeth and a charming dimple. "It wasn't till I pulled up into the driveway that I remembered today is her golf day. Took all the wind out of my sails, I can tell you. But no way was I going back to Seoul without showing someone. Naturally, I thought of you. So...what do you think?" and he waved in the direction of the car. "It's one of the new Mazda Eunos 800s. The Miller Cycle version. Great red, isn't it?" he finished.

Every drop of joy drained out of Hyeonji. Hoseok hadn't come for her birthday. He'd come to show her a pathetic car. Worse, she hadn't even been his first choice of viewer. She'd run a very poor second. As usual. Something hard curled around her heart, setting in concrete and trapping her love for him deep inside. Hyeonji determined it would never see the light of day again. She glanced coldly over at the offending vehicle and shrugged dismissively. "If you've seen one red car Hoseok," she said coolly, "You've seen them all."

There was no doubt he was taken aback by the icy indifference of her tone, for his eyebrows shot up and he stared at her with bewilderment in his beautiful brown eyes. Hyeonji was disgusted with herself for instantly feeling guilty. So much for her first foray into hating Hoseok, but she was determined not to weaken this time. Enough was enough.

"You know me Hoseok," she went on brusquely. "I've never been a car person."

"That's because you've never learned to drive, Hyeonji. You'd appreciate cars more if you were ever behind the wheel. Come on. Come for a short spin with me." He actually took her arm and began propelling her across the pavement. "Hobi!" she protested, wrenching her arm away from his hold and planting her sensible shoes firmly on the pavement. "I can't. I'm at work."

"But surely the library's not even open," he argued. "Certainly they won't miss you for a couple of minutes?"

"That's beside the point," she said sternly. "You might be your own boss, Hoseok, and come and go as you please, but most people can't, me included. Besides, it's almost morning tea and I have to be here for that." The rest of the staff had all chipped in to buy her a cake. It was a tradition in the library whenever one of them had a birthday. No way was she going to run out on her real friends to indulge Hobi's ego.

"I don't see why," he said stubbornly.

No you wouldn't...

Hyeonji thought mutinously, and toyed with telling him, just so he could feel terrible for a full ten seconds. The decision was taken out of her hand when Choon Hee popped her head out the door. "Come on birthday girl. Namjoon and the new girlfriend Han Byeol brought your cake along and all twenty-three candles are alight and waiting. So get in here and do the honors. You can bring your hunk of a friend, if you like," she added, looking Hoseok up and down with saucily admiring eyes.

"We've got more than enough cake for an extra mouth" Hyeonji relished Hoseok's groan. To give him some credit he did look suitably apologetic once Choon Hee appeared. "God, Hyeonji, I had no idea it was your birthday. There I was, blabbering away about my new car, and all the time you must be thinking how damned selfish I was being." Frankly, she was enjoying his guilt. It had a deliciously soothing effect on her damaged pride. "That's all right Hobi. I'm used to your not remembering my birthday." He winced anew. "Don't make me feel any more rotten that I already do." Hyeonji almost gave in. it was awfully hard to stay mad at Hoseok. He didn't mean to be selfish. He was, unfortunately, the product of a doting mother and far too many God given talents. Brains and beauty did not make for a modest, self-effacing kind of guy.

Hoseok could be generous and charming when he set his mind to it, but in the main he was a self-absorbed individual who rarely saw beyond end of his own classically shaped nose. God know why I love him so much, Hyeonji though irritably. But then her eyes travelled slowly from his perfect face down over his perfect body, and every female cell she owned clamored to be noticed back.

But the only expression in his eyes when he looked down at her was remorse. When he forcibly linked arms with her, she glared her frustration up to him. "Don't be mad at me, Hyeonji" he said with disarming softness. "I'm not mad at you," she returned stiffly.

"Oh, yes, you are. And you have every right to be. But I'll make it you to you tonight, if you'll let me" says the man who is desperately clinging to your arms. "Tonight?" she echoed far too weakly. "Yes, tonight," he said firmly. "But for now I think your colleagues are waiting for you to blow out those twenty-three candles."

With typical Hoseok confidence he steered her into the library and proceeded to charm everyone in the place. It annoyed Hyeonji that he gave her openly curious workmates the impression that he was a boyfriend of sorts. He even extracted her promise in Choon Hee's goggle-eyed presence to go out with him later that evening. She initially refused dinner, no way was she going to disappoint her mother, but grudgingly agreed to after-dinner coffee somewhere.

Hyeonji told herself afterwards that she would never have agreed to go out with him at all if she'd been alone with him. She would have sent him on his way with a flea in his ear. She didn't need his pity, or guilt. The moment his new red Mazda roared of up the road back in the direction of Seoul, Choon Hee and Han Byeol settled their dryly knowing eyes on her.

"Well you're a dark horse, Hyeonji, aren't you?" Choon Hee said as they walked together back into the library. "I've always thought of you as a quiet little thing and all this time you had something like that on the side." Han Byeol giggled along with Choon Hee. Hyeonji silently cursed Hoseok. All he ever caused her was trouble and heartache. "Hoseok's mother lives next door," she explained with more calm than she was feeling. "I've known Hobi for years. We're just good friends."

"Oh sure. He drove all the way up from Seoul to wish you a happy birthday because you're just good friends. You know what? I'll bet you're one of those girls who go home from the office at night, and perform one of those ten-second transformations." Choon Hee laughed while Han Byeol agreeing to every word she said. "You know the type. Off come the glasses and the straight laced clothes. Down comes the hair. On goes the sexy gear, make-up, and perfume, and –WHAM! Instant meat in heat!"

Hyeonji had to laugh. It would take more than seconds to transform her. "You can laugh," Han Byeol scoffed. "But I'm no one's fool. And you're far prettier than you pretend to be. I always did wonder why you never seemed to be on the lookout for a fella. I was beginning to think all sorts of things till glamour boy arrived on the scene today. He gave me a case of instant heat, I can tell you. And I saw the way you looked at him when you didn't think anyone was noticing. You've got it bad. I know the signs. So why haven't I heard of this paragon perfection before? Why all the mystery and secrecy? Is he married? A womanizer? A bad boy? Look, you can trust me with your deep dark secrets" she whispered. "I won't tell anyone."

Hyeonji laughed a second time. "There's nothing deep or dark to tell. I repeat... we're just good friends. As I said before Hobi used to live next door. We went to school together, though not in the same class. He was two years ahead of me."

"Well, there's nothing remotely boy-next-door about him anymore" came Choon Hee's dry remark. "He has city written all over him. Not to mention success." Hyeonji and Han Byeol nodded to this "I am well aware of that, believe me. I'm not blind, but there's never been any romance between us, and there never will be. He has a steady girlfriend. Goes by the name of Tinashe."

"Tinashe," Choon Hee repeated, her nose wrinkling. "Don't tell me. She's stunning with boobs to die for, hair down to her waist and legs up to her armpits?" Hyeonji startled. "You know her?"

"Nope. Just guessed. Men like your Hoseok always seem to have girls like that on their arm" Choon Hee smirks. "He isn't my Hoseok" Hyeonji said tightly. "But you like him to be, don't you?" Han Byeol added.

Hyeonji opened her mouth to deny it. But her tongue betrayed her when a thickness claimed it. Tears pricked at her back of her eyes.

Her Hoseok...

What a concept. What an improbable, impossible, inconceivable, unachievable concept. To keep clinging to it was not only demeaning to her personally but depressing in the extreme. "There was a time when I did" she said at last, her tone clipped and cold. "But not anymore. I have better things to do with my life than pine for the impossible."

"Impossible? Why do you say impossible?" as Han Byeol curiously asked. "For pity's sake Han Byeol, you've seen him and you too Choon. You guys said so yourself men like Hoseok go for girls like Tinashe, not mousy little things like me."

"You'd be far from mousy if you made the best of yourself. To be frank, Hyeonji, a little make-up wouldn't go astray. And an occasional visit to the hairdresser." Hyeonji stiffened, despite the criticism striking home. "I wouldn't want a man who didn't love me for myself" CHoon Hee said sharply. "That's rubbish and you know it! I'm a married lady and I still have to work hard to keep my man. Now you listen to me, Hyeonji and you too Han Byeol for your sake and Namjoon's." Choon Hee turns to face Hyeonji "Now, when Hoseok comes to take you out tonight. Surprise him."

"Surprise him?" Hyeonji asked dryly feeling nervous about Choon Hee's suggestion. "Yes, leave your hair down. Slap some make-up on." Han Byeol added "Use a sexy perfume. Wear something which shows off that great little figure of yours." Choon Hee nodded in approval.

For a split second, Hyeonji was buoyed up by Choon Hee and Han Byeol's compliments on her figure. But then she thought of Tinashe's tall, voluptuous, sex-bomb body and her momentary high was totally deflated.

"I don't have any sexy perfume," she murmured dispiritedly. She didn't own much make-up either. But she wasn't about to admit that. Choon Hee gave her an exasperated glare. "Then buy some at the mall during your lunch hour!" Their library was in a small regional center which boasted a few shops, a well-stocked chemist shop included. Hyeonji declined telling CHoon Hee and Han Byeol that she only had five dollars in her purse. Sexy perfume was expensive, and she'd rather wear nothing than douse herself in a cheap scent.

Hyeonji actually contemplating asking her friends to lend her some money and reality returned with a rush. She could wear more make-up than a Japanese geisha and drown herself in the most exotic expensive perfume in the world and it would not make Hoseok fall in love with her. "Thank you for your advice ladies," she said with a return to common sense "but I really rather just be myself. Now I'd better get back to these books." Hyeonji resumed checking in the returns, blocking her mind to everything but the thought that at least she would not starve to death tonight after her mother's special birthday meal. Hoseok could buy her something delicious and creamy to go with her after-dinner coffee.

Hyeonji gave no more thought to the girl's advice about make-up and perfume, till she arrived home late that afternoon and opened her carryall to find a paper parcel sitting on top of her house keys. It contained a small but expensive-looking bottle of perfume.

And a note. "Happy birthday darling!" Choon Hee and Han Byeol had written with their usual extravagant hand writing. "This always worked for me. Well, sometimes. Still, what have you got to lose? Go for it! We chipped in so don't worry about it. We love you. Go get your man!"

Hyeonji sprayed a tiny burst of perfume onto her wrist and lifted it to her nose. It was a wonderfully sensual smell, its heavy musk perfume bringing images of satin sheets and naked bodies and untold unknown delights. Hyeonji shook her head. To wear such a scent in Hoseok's presence would be the ultimate torture, and let's face it, Hyeonji told herself, wearing perfume, no matter how sensual, isn't about to turn Hoseok into some kind of sex-crazed lunatic. With a girl like Tinashe in tow, no doubt he has all the sex he can handle. Hyeonji glanced at the perfume's name and laughed.

SEDUCTRESS

Good Lord. It would've been a powerful potion to turn her into that. It was a nice thought of Choon Hee and Han Byeol's, but a total waste of time and money. So was her advice. For Hyeonji she believed she did have something to lose. Her self-respect, and possibly Hoseok's friendship.

Chapter 03

Masterlist

[punkscowardschampions]

Nancy & Rio

Nancy: I heard from Edie, so you can pass that good news on, like Rio: Yeah? Rio: Did she say where she was or anything? Nancy: Obviously not Nancy: Why talk about herself when she can have more fun being a bitch about everyone else, right? Rio: At least you heard from her, something to tell the 'rents anyway, better than radio silence Rio: that's about how it usually goes, yeah Nancy: Yeah Rio: Cheers for letting us know Rio: how's everything? Nancy: The baby's fine. Ro's Ro Rio: Yeah Rio: She been to sleep yet? Nancy: Of course not Rio: Didn't think so Rio: She'll crash eventually Nancy: She should be medicated Nancy: But you know Rio: Not if she's gonna breastfeed Rio: if she can produce milk Nancy: She blatantly won't Nancy: Jesus, if she doesn't want drugs I'll take them Nancy: Fight my mum for them, like Rio: Shame Daddy hasn't put in an appearance yet, could really come through for you all by the sounds Nancy: I'm not that desperate Nancy: Not yet Rio: He'll be gutted Nancy: I'd like to think he'd be a bit too preoccupied to notice me Rio: Unlikely Rio: newborns are time consuming for the Ma sure, but boring lbr, not gonna pique his interest Nancy: I'm unlikely to either though Nancy: This is hardly a club atmosphere Nancy: Shame, like Rio: He's willing to liven up a baby shower Rio: can't be tamed, truly Nancy: Don't Nancy: I can only repress so much and I'm at my limit here Rio: Weren't that bad, like Nancy: Still Nancy: Thanks to your sister I'm in no mood Rio: Whaddya gonna do Nancy: How or what do I know Rio: Well it's over now Nancy: If only we could say that about the rest of this mess Nancy: Did Buster send you his flight details yet? Rio: Can't cry about it forever Rio: she'll get on with it Rio: Drew'll do whatever he does, life goes on Rio: Yeah, did he you Nancy: None of that is good enough, but yeah sure Nancy: Of course he didn't Nancy: He doesn't need me to pick him up from the airport, like Nancy: Priorities Rio: Maybe not Rio: but that's how it is regardless Rio: True enough Nancy: The defeatist attitude is catching, yeah? Okay Rio: What? Nancy: None of us are gonna care about how much of a mess this is anymore then? It's run its course Rio: She's a grown woman Rio: and it's her life Rio: What do you expect me to do Rio: or you Nancy: I don't expect you to do anything Nancy: Just be happy that my brother is coming back for this Nancy: That's what matters, obviously Rio: Why have you got a problem with me suddenly? Nancy: I don't Nancy: You know that's what important Rio: Well I'm not allowed to see the baby so yeah, to me it is Rio: if you want me to rock up and make Ro worse, like, I still won't so sorry to disappoint Nancy: How do you think that's what I want? Nancy: Oh my god Rio: Well you're pissed off at someone, babe and you're directing it at me Rio: and I haven't done anything else wrong, unless I have so Nancy: How are you not pissed off at everyone? That's my point Rio: Because it's exhausting Rio: and I don't care to change her mind of me, she can think what she likes Nancy: It's exhausting trying to hold everything together too Nancy: It's exhausting every way Rio: I know Rio: that's why I've stopped Rio: call it defeatist but it wasn't working anyway Nancy: I don't want to do this anymore Nancy: Maybe Edie's right Nancy: Or you are with using my brother as your escape hatch Rio: Fuck you Rio: that's not what I'm doing Nancy: No? Rio: No Nancy: Well then maybe you should Nancy: He does with you, to deal with being there Rio: Grow up Rio: She's 15 Rio: What's your excuse? Nancy: What's your problem? Nancy: You love him, you lean on him, that's how it works Rio: You have no idea Nancy: I know how relationships work I'm not a total idiot Rio: if you think it's using each other for a means to an end then no Rio: you really don't Nancy: What so you're mad 'cause I put the word use in there? Nancy: Okay its the wrong word Nancy: I'm sorry Rio: Whatever, forget about it Nancy: No Rio: Then what Rio: say what you wanna say Nancy: I don't want to fall out with you Nancy: I need you, okay? Nancy: So let me fix it Rio: We're not gonna fall out Rio: it's alright Nancy: It's not Nancy: Nothing is Nancy: I'm as much of a mess as everything else Rio: Yeah Rio: I know Rio: but I really don't have any solutions, I'm sorry, like Rio: I really am Nancy: It's not your job Rio: Nope Rio: it's no one's but we can still try Rio: or not Rio: either way is fine Nancy: I don't know what to do Nancy: Nothing I've tried works Nancy: I can't even talk to Edie, I'm out of my depth with everything Nancy: Jesus Rio: Well, no one can talk to Edie Rio: It's always on her terms, she's just good at that, it keeps everyone at a distance she's happy with Rio: but Rio: what else do you need to deal with, right now, like? Nancy: It was like I was back on the playground, like oh she's horrible to me I gotta be horrible back Nancy: Am I a child? No Nancy: And you were there the other night too so Rio: You can't beat yourself up about it Rio: It's what she wanted Rio: and you still tried, so it's something, though it doesn't feel worth it, I'm sure Nancy: Yeah, I guess Rio: It is Rio: My Ma will appreciate it if literally nothing else Nancy: It's fucked 'cause so much of what she said about me is true Rio: Don't mean she had to say it the way she did Rio: if at all Rio: 'cos I've been there, I know how it goes Nancy: What does it say about me though that I'm such a mess she doesn't even know me and she knows it Rio: She pays more attention than you'd reckon she could Rio: being gone and that Nancy: Clearly Nancy: What a headfuck Rio: Yeah Rio: I ain't gonna apologize on her behalf, you know but Rio: sorry it's got you this way now Nancy: It's not just her Nancy: I wish I could handle her all the blame but Nancy: hand* Nancy: I've made plenty of my own mistakes on top Rio: Yeah Rio: I know you're struggling right now Rio: and I know the club only ever seems like the answer once you're drunk enough, if that Rio: but I'm fucked if I have any better ideas, you know Nancy: I don't think I can ever go back there Nancy: It's so embarrassing Nancy: Thank god this town has plenty of others Rio: You know Rio: they see it every night too, babe Nancy: Okay, I'll take that but if I see that girl again I will die Rio: Not to be that bitch but do you even remember her face Rio: the snaps already dead, like Nancy: Ouch Nancy: I can't forget 'cause she's texted me since Nancy: I'm such a mess even strangers have to check in and check up Rio: Oh dear Rio: at least she's being Rio: nice? Rio: Yeah, that is shaming, no way 'round it Nancy: You don't even know Nancy: But don't worry I won't give you details Rio: You can if you wanna vent but yeah, also feel free to take it to your grave Rio: again, been there, most of us have Nancy: I don't think you have though Nancy: That's what I'm saying Nancy: We were having fun, I thought, but then she rejected me 'cause I was too drunk Nancy: I can't do anything right, literally Rio: Ahh Rio: awkward but at least she did the decent thing, like Rio: it's rare people do, sadly Nancy: Buster has slept with how many girls on nights out, like Nancy: I can't even get one Nancy: It's depressing Rio: Probably don't make it a competition, like Rio: if the vibe ain't good, people are gonna pick up on it Nancy: I know you're right Nancy: But god Rio: I know Rio: it's frustrating then it's like, kill me Rio: I have been there, just the once like but Rio: I know how it is Nancy: Give me a war story I need to be cheered Nancy: Thanks Rio: I don't think it will 'cos literally your brother only lad decent enough and you get enough of his heroics Rio: hmm Rio: oh, I can tell you about the time I rode his friend James because that's enough to make anyone feel better about their life Nancy: OH MY GOD Nancy: James as in the boy Chloe is with? Rio: Mhmm Nancy: GROSS Nancy: I can't believe they are having a baby together Rio: I know Rio: Wanna feel sorry for a kid Rio: That's the one, like Nancy: Honestly Nancy: That has actually made me feel less sad Nancy: Thanks, Ri Nancy: Sorry I was such a bitch Rio: Don't mention it Rio: Nothing laughing at the misfortune of others can't fix Rio: Kinda Nancy: Can we mention why the hell you let James near you though? Nancy: That needs to be addressed Rio: 😒 that makes it so much worse Rio: lord Rio: cut a long story short, boyf of the time left me stranded and i needed a bed for the night Rio: bad as it sounds, so you are free to judge Nancy: Oh Nancy: Why didn't you go to ours if you were in London? Rio: Well, I was trying to avoid your brother so yeah Rio: fail all 'round Nancy: It's my house too Nancy: You can always go there even if he's being a prick Rio: Thanks for the retroactive offer, babe Rio: appreciate it Rio: as much as it'd be a laugh to come for her mans, not gonna repeat Nancy: I don't even like boys but even I can tell he wouldn't be good in bed Rio: 😬 Rio: oh god don't remind me Rio: the flashbacks 😂 Nancy: Sorry babe Nancy: He always used to flirt with me Nancy: So I'll join you in the gross flashbacks, like Rio: yeah buster said Rio: actual deviant, like Nancy: The threesome jokes, oh lord Nancy: Why James Rio: He's tragic Rio: Can't even wish Chloe on him though Nancy: I bet she'll agree to get another girl in Nancy: As long as she doesn't call me, like Rio: Ew God Rio: the phonecall no one needs Nancy: She's so bi curious we all know it Rio: 😂 you reckon Nancy: That homophobia is coming from somewhere, and in this century, come on Rio: You right Rio: gonna come out on James in like 10 years time Nancy: At least her kid might end up with one decent mum Nancy: I'm still not volunteering though Nancy: Sorry Chlo Rio: Oh snap Rio: sure one of her friends will be down Rio: cute accessory if nowt else Nancy: They've all kissed each other at enough parties Nancy: Don't start me on that Rio: I mean Rio: guilty Rio: at least I backed it up? 😬 Nancy: You need to explain yourself before I fight you Rio: 😂 but we just made up Nancy: And you weren't bullying me for liking girls then kissing them to attract boys, but Nancy: Still side eyeing you Nancy: I was gonna ask what you were doing tonight but now we have drama so, like Rio: Damn, it be like that Rio: I won't even tell you I'm free then Nancy: Invite me somewhere and I'll forgive you Nancy: Maybe Nancy: 'Cause my mum and yours are swapping babysitting duties for my aunt and I don't wanna be home for her return really Rio: Alright Rio: see what I can do Rio: you can crash at ours if nothing else, what's another head Nancy: No drinking and no clubs, yeah? Nancy: There's my only rules Rio: Got you Nancy: I need a girlfriend so you can stop taking me on dates Rio: Oh Rio: Charming Nancy: You know me and my brother don't like sharing Rio: 😏 Yeah okay Rio: nothing personal, is it? Nancy: You know I love you, babe Nancy: Not gonna say more than him but Rio: If you not willing to put up the fight, fine Rio: so defeatist, god 😉 Nancy: I deserve that okay, bitch Rio: Yeah, now we're even Nancy: I'm so sad, be nice to me Rio: I see where you're going wrong, babe Rio: that's no chat up line is it Nancy: Oh my god Nancy: Are you really hate criming me again? Nancy: Girl stop Rio: I'm giving you advice to get bitches Rio: literally could not be more of an ally thanks Nancy: I'm yet to see any actual advice Nancy: Fake fan Rio: Only 'cos you won't let me Rio: call me out for queerbaiting Nancy: When have I stopped you? Rio: It's in your eyes, babe Rio: 👀 Nancy: You know I'm shy Nancy: The eye contact is very intense, babe Rio: 😏 Tips Nancy: If you were that committed to helping me you wouldn't have taught my brother to kiss Nancy: I had to learn on my own, outrageous Rio: Like you would ever Rio: do you remember that kid who used to hang around us Rio: we couldn't think of his name Nancy: The one who dared you? Nancy: Sure Nancy: Sully Nancy: I don't know why I can remember that and not what I did earlier Rio: Omg Rio: that's it! Rio: Nice one, babe Nancy: He was so Nancy: Well, weird Rio: You know Rio: was dubious how often he was in the pub, tbf Rio: not your grandad Rio: idek what punter was his old man Nancy: I feel like it was that man who always left his teeth behind Nancy: Creeped me out Nancy: Not saying it's why I'm gay but sir, please don't Rio: 😂 Rio: ew Rio: root of all your trauma Rio: you have a good memory, I'd forgot so much of this Nancy: What I literally don't have in short term I make up for in recall, apparently Nancy: Men are so gross Rio: Committing that to memory, gotcha Rio: the talent was not all that Rio: probably didn't think they were being judged by children tho Nancy: Do you remember that barmaid? She could be why you're straight by the same logic Rio: Oh my God, I do remember her Rio: literally reminds me of that bitch from the angel Rio: sue, sharon, whatever Rio: if she wouldn't be well past it by now i'd reckon it was her, telling me off still Nancy: Right?! Nancy: Buster never got in trouble, the prick Nancy: Which still hasn't changed Rio: 🙄 such a jammy lil lickarse Rio: bless Nancy: Golden boy forever Nancy: It's not my fault I was clumsy as hell Nancy: I hadn't grown into my tallness yet okay sorry Rio: aw Rio: like bambi on ice Rio: it's so sharon, woman hater forreal Rio: soz we were cute babe Nancy: Especially me, call me hun 💋 Nancy: 😂 Rio: 😂 Rio: i know u did not want her to lips you over me Rio: that's just a barefaced lie Nancy: True Nancy: But we aren't playing truth or dare now Rio: Guess that isn't tempting enough plans then? Rio: back to the drawing board Nancy: It'd be fun Nancy: Until you got too honest about my brother Nancy: Gross Rio: You control what you ask, so don't be nosy and we'll be fine 😜 Rio: Just come over then, I'll find a shitty chickflick on netflix, get some popcorn Nancy: Okay Nancy: Are you there now? Rio: Yep, I don't know who else is exactly but it's chill Rio: no doubt gracie and bills will clamour to go with mum Rio: but can maybe tempt 'em if we got some ice cream in Nancy: I'll let Grace do my nails Nancy: They are so chipped right now Rio: Now that's an offer Nancy: She can straighten my hair too if she wants Nancy: Not gonna resist Rio: Seriously, how could she Rio: like she working on commission with them things, I swear 😏 Nancy: I'll pay her in not loudly booing every time the man is on screen Rio: 😂 that's the spirit Nancy: I can't promise I won't make it gay whenever the 'best friend' appears but you know Nancy: What can you do when its not even subtext? Rio: Idk, go storyboard some fanfiction about it probably Rio: is that not how tween you would do Nancy: I don't even wanna write when school makes me, thank you Rio: You mean you had to whack it to porn like the rest of us heathens Rio: that's so sad Nancy: Yeah Nancy: No wonder I'm such a mess, like Rio: I hope you watched gay porn 'cos lesbian is bad Rio: like bad bad Nancy: Tell me something I don't know Nancy: But there are some lesbians making it these days Nancy: Taking the fanfiction up a notch, if you like Rio: that's something Rio: but we aren't watching porn with my little sisters, sorry Nancy: Good Nancy: If you wanna come on to me I know you can be more creative than that Rio: Throwing down the gauntlet like that alright Rio: I see you 😂 Nancy: Like I said, I need a girlfriend Rio: Yeah Rio: I'll get on Tinder for you, get the ball rollin' Nancy: Don't Nancy: That's not the kind of dares we're doing Rio: Fine Rio: but I'm taken n off limits, remember Nancy: 💔 Nancy: But sure Rio: 😘 heartbreaker forever Nancy: I'll text Sully about it Rio: 100% will dare you to like hey remember me Nancy: If we can find him Nancy: How many Sullivans are there? 1000s Rio: Banking on your encyclopedic memory and my sleuthing skillz, of course Nancy: I wish I knew his actual name like Nancy: Where are you? Was that teeth man your dad? Rio: So many questions left unanswered Rio: are you fit now Rio: should i have hit that Nancy: You should've kissed him instead Nancy: Maybe he'd still be part of the gang Rio: he should've tried harder Rio: wimp, like Nancy: He was trying pretty hard you were just paying more attention to Buster Rio: Shh Nancy: 🙄 Nancy: And I didn't see this coming Nancy: Okay then Rio: I mean Rio: If anyone should've Nancy: I'm an idiot Nancy: Moving on Rio: It's alright, it's not like I kept showing him how to kiss and you were like Rio: this game has been going on too long lads Nancy: Oh my god Nancy: Don't put mental images in my head, like Rio: you know we were avoiding each other Nancy: I know that's what you said Rio: You don't trust me? 😲 Rio: Rude Nancy: I'm just saying Nancy: I've said lots of things and not said even more Rio: Mysterious Rio: Imma get the truth Rio: Sleuthing Nancy: Not if that's literally the game, babe Nancy: You won't have to work very hard Rio: Gotta ask the right questions still Rio: don't downplay my hardwork Nancy: Yeah yeah Nancy: I'm doing my own making myself look presentable so Rio: aw for me? Rio: you didn't need to do that Nancy: More 'cause I don't need Gracie asking me why I've been crying Nancy: But you can still enjoy the view Rio: Oh babe Rio: dry your eyes Nancy: They are, but the mascara ain't letting me forget Nancy: Waterproof is such a lie Rio: Preach Nancy: I've spent so much money on so many different brands Nancy: Rude, like Rio: Practically funded the research, babe Rio: do they care, no Nancy: Seriously Nancy: Let me cry I'm stressed Rio: but well-dressed Rio: what really matters Nancy: Not right now, but you're easily impressed so Rio: 😱 Rio: Literally the rudest thing you've said to me Rio: get out Nancy: Sorry but you're dating Buster Rio: 😒 Rio: square up Nancy: No Nancy: You're small but fierce Rio: Yeah and we're brawling now Rio: 🥊 Nancy: Stop trying to gay bash me Rio: Stop thinking gay and mean are personality traits, bitch 😜 Nancy: Ouch Nancy: Now that was mean Rio: Got too real Rio: you did come for my mans Nancy: He's my twin, I have to Rio: 😂 Rio: Fair, just keep it behind my back too, like Nancy: Fine Nancy: Am I actually a bitch? Rio: No Nancy: You can tell me if I am, like Nancy: I won't start a real fight over it Rio: You aren't Rio: no more than you've got right to be Nancy: That just means I am but you like it 😏 okay Rio: Steady on Rio: it means you're fine Nancy: Alright Rio: Trust Nancy: I'm raiding our fridge for snacks to bring, anything you want? Nancy: Cupboards after Rio: hmm is there anything that contains carbs/sugar in your house Rio: 'cos that's all I'm feeling Nancy: I'm the one who shops for this house so yeah Rio: 🙌 Nancy: I'm literally looting before mum returns I feel like I'm about 10 years old Rio: That's the plan, baby Nancy: Take me back Nancy: I peaked too young clearly Nancy: All been going wrong since Rio: Oh hush Rio: you the same bad bitch you was then Nancy: 😂 Rio: i'm fr hoe Nancy: You're ridiculous Rio: 😑 Nancy: I've never been a bad bitch and you can't be mad about it Rio: Disagree Nancy: How and why? Rio: I'm not gonna be gay about it Rio: but you're funny and not afraid to be yourself with it, what's not bad about that Nancy: There'd be nothing bad about it if everyone else also thought it Rio: Who cares what they think Nancy: Um...me Nancy: Obviously Rio: Why Rio: like genuine Nancy: 'Cause I had so many girls telling me negatives so many years and I don't wanna believe that they are right Nancy: Other options would be nice Nancy: Other opinions too, like Rio: Fair enough Rio: but who do you reckon doesn't think that Nancy: Nobody's changed my mind that they got anything wrong about me yet Nancy: Homophobia aside Nancy: Quinn's the only one who liked me and I proved her wrong fast enough Rio: Plenty of people like you, Nance Rio: and more would if you were more open, that's the only reason you don't feel it Rio: but that don't mean it's bad, it's just statistics Nancy: Whatever, it is what it is Rio: Not whatever Rio: people like you Rio: you should like you Nancy: This family doesn't count Nancy: No offense Rio: why not Rio: they're who you spend most your time with Rio: only makes sense to care about their opinion, like Nancy: 'Cause other than Edie none of them are gonna come for me Nancy: Granddad isn't gonna turn me away from his birthday for being a state, like Rio: you don't reckon Rio: everyone in this fam has a loud mouth Rio: if you were doing something wrong, you'd know about it, yeah? Rio: just because we can't fix everything don't mean there's no accountability, like Nancy: Just 'cause they like me doesn't make me a decent person either Nancy: So like I said, whatever Rio: 'cos we're all cunts, yeah Nancy: No, you're all biased Nancy: I'm one of you Rio: everyone's biased, anyone that likes you that'll just be 'cos they're your friend or your girlfriend whatever Rio: you never gonna get the general approval of the town like, it's a myth babe Nancy: I'll get therapy and I'll get over it Nancy: Moving on Rio: 😒 Nancy: There's too much to unpack never mind for you to fix Rio: Yeah but are you actually going to go therapy Nancy: What else am I gonna do? Rio: Good Rio: the therapist'll tell you Rio: I ain't qualified, like Nancy: Here's hoping I get a man so I don't fall in love, like Rio: Oh God Rio: Don't even play Nancy: I'm not Nancy: You know I probably would Nancy: And I want that even less than I want to tell any man my problems Rio: You would not, you know now Rio: the illusion was shattered very publicly, like Nancy: It happens to loads of people Nancy: Literally a trope, babe Nancy: We can't give me that much credit Rio: Yeah but they know how to swerve that shit better than a clueless straight teacher Rio: shut you right down Nancy: I guess we'll see Nancy: Or not Rio: Keep me posted Rio: but hurry up with them snacks rn Nancy: I'm literally telling you nothing about my confidential sessions Nancy: But yeah Nancy: On my way Rio: 🙄 Spoilsport Rio: I mean how it goes, you div Rio: 👍 Nancy: Keeping secrets is kind of my thing, sorry, babe Rio: Not tonight bitch Rio: 'less you feeling that daring Nancy: Please, your dares aren't gonna be that scary Rio: 😏 Rio: Challenge accepted Nancy: Okay

[citycfangels]

text: charlie ⇄ raquel

Charlie: How was that date?

Raquel: how was the rest of your shift?

Charlie: it was good, as usual

Charlie: you didn't answer my question

Raquel: right, well I'm glad. Hopefully your tips were good.

Raquel: I know that.

Charlie: oh, they were. mostly because you weren't there, so a lot of them went to me

Charlie: so, how was it? you guys left the bar together with a lot of pda

Raquel: So me leaving actually helped you. Maybe there were just a lot of gay guys there.

Raquel: don't do this. We shouldn't talk about it and you asking about it doesn't help but if you really want to know it was fine.

Raquel: now can you please stop asking?

Charlie: and a lot of girls, actually. although you know i prefer you to be here with me, but you had a date

Charlie: talk about what? your date?

Raquel: I know and I actually wanted to be at work with you.

Raquel: no, about the moon landing. Houston we actually didn't have a problem. Yes about my date.

Charlie: oh really? you seemed to have a lot of fun with him and the date hadn't even started

Charlie: okay, do you want to talk about something else or what?

Charlie: because i want to talk to you about something else

Raquel: please don't get jealous. I wanted to be at work.

Raquel: why couldn't you just lead with what you really want to talk to me about? What is it?

Charlie: did he have to touch your ass in front of me? did he have to kiss you too?

Raquel: Charlie.

Raquel: I'm sorry, but is that really what you want to talk about? How my boyfriend touched me in front of you?

Charlie: yes, because it's been five days since you promised and...

Charlie: i can't believe i'm asking this, but are you ever going to break up with him?

Raquel: YOU TOLD ME TO TAKE MY TIME AND IT HASN'T BEEN EASY.

Raquel: I didn't even see him until you saw him show up and it just wasn't a good time. He's having a hard time at work and he has a presentation coming up.

Raquel: I told you I would and I don't break my promises.

Charlie: hey, seeing you with him hasn't been easy either, especially when he's so hell bent on showing you off as his girlfriend

Charlie: i trust you but it's not easy to see you with another guy

Raquel: then can you just trust me when I say I don't love him? Trust me enough to know that I would do anything so that you didn't have to see me with him. Trust me to know that I'm coming back to you.

Charlie: and i'm supposed to not feel jealous? because hell, i am

Charlie: i know you don't love him. i know you're coming back to me. trust me, i know, but that doesn't mean i cannot hate this. i have the right to feel like this

Raquel: I'm not saying you can't feel jealous. Whether we were getting back together or not you have ever right to be jealous.

Raquel: I know this is my fault and that there are a few ways to fix this but I just need you to know that I never meant to hurt you. Or anyone.

Charlie: but we are, right?

Charlie: i know you didn't mean to but

Charlie: i don't know, it's just that i should be the one doing those things in public. kissing you, touching you.

Charlie: calling you my girlfriend too [unsent]

Raquel: Yes we are.

Raquel: I know and I want you to do all of those things. I want to make you so happy. I want you to kiss me like you did before and hold me. I want to be able to hold you and not feel guilty knowing that you could be with someone else or knowing that I'm hurting the person I'm crazy about.

Raquel: just give me a few more days and I promise you that everything will be the way you want it to be.

Charlie: good

Charlie: okay, i'll wait. i want all of that and more, and not to do that only in private

Charlie: i should have kept my jealousy in check, sorry

Raquel: you'll get that. I promise things will be better than they were.

Raquel: Baby, I care that your jealous. I do and i understand it. You have every right to be mad and to talk to me about how you feel. Maybe that was part of what ruined us before? We didn't talk about how we were jealous or about what was really going on. If you're jealous tell me. I'd rather you tell me that you're jealous than you being passive aggressive and hiding how you really feel. You have nothing to apologize for.

Charlie: i can't wait for that, but i promise i'll wait for you to break things off. i'll do my best.

Charlie: now you say it that way, maybe you're right. we didn't really talk about how we felt or what bothered us. i will tell you from now on, and i hope you do the same.

Charlie: i'll try to not think of punching him in the face too, because that was the first thought i had when he touched your ass in front of me.

Raquel: I know I haven't told you today but you really are the best and most understanding guy I could ever hope for.

Raquel: how did I get so lucky?

Raquel: no violence. Punching him wouldn't have solve anything. And anything that would risk you ruining your face isn't worth it

Charlie: that's always good to know.

Charlie: so you care about what happens to my face, huh?

Charlie: no violence, i promise. that will only happen in my head.

Raquel: of course I care about that face. It's attached to the lips I love to kiss and to the rest of the body I don't want to live without.

Raquel: okay, good. Besides, when it comes to fighting I think he might have you beat so let's just not risk it.

Charlie: that's one of the cheesiest things you've ever said to me

Charlie: what makes you think that? i can give him a hard time before i can beat him

Raquel: I own my cheesiness. Call me Nacho.

Raquel: No. I can watch almost anyone get hurt except for you.

Charlie: you're a fucking nacho, Nacho Mallory

Charlie: if i did, would you patch me up and take care of my wounds?

Raquel: my latin is on full display when you call me that.

Raquel: I'd rather not have to but if you're asking if I'd nurse you back to health if you ever got sick or hurt then yes.

Charlie: oh, i'd love to see that in person someday, Nacho

Charlie: let's hope you don't have to, but the idea of you as my personal nurse is nice

Charlie: my sexy personal nurse

Raquel: well you should know that Nacho only knows how to count to twenty and is horrible at rolling her Rs.

Raquel: I'd give you lots of mouth to mouth.

Charlie: does she know how to talk dirty in spanish?

Charlie: oh, i like that. the nurse costume is included or would you ditch it?

Raquel: I don't think so. She likes being cheesy not dirty.

Raquel: well eventually we'd both have to get rid of all our clothes.

Charlie: and you? would you do that?

Charlie: interesting, but what if i'm sick and i have fever?

Raquel: If i knew how, probably. I could always try to learn.

Raquel: If you're sick and have a fever it's my job as your girlfriend (deleted)

Raquel: Of course I'd take care of you if you were sick and had a fever.

Charlie: well, if you do, let me know. i haven't had anyone talking dirty to me in another language, so that'd be a first

Charlie: wouldn't you get sick too?

Raquel: well I can try an learn a lot of languages the good thing is that if I ay the wrong thing you'll never know.

Raquel: maybe but if I get sick you don't have to take care of me so at least there's that.

Charlie: i wouldn't like to find out you accidentally insulted my in a different language, so i would trust you said the right thing instead

Charlie: another benefit: we can sweat it out if we had any strength

Raquel: you actually think I'd insult you?

Raquel: There is always that. I hear that sex actually is the best way to get rid of a cold.

Charlie: not on purpose, but you could always end up saying something weird

Charlie: oh yes. we fuck, we sweat it out, we're fine in no time. sounds like a good way to get rid of it

Raquel: I'll just learn the dirty things to say then and not really learn a new language. I'll fake learn a new language.

Raquel: I should have known you'd be okay with that. I'm just surprised you're not saying you're feeling feverish now.

Charlie: sounds like a plan. i hope it's as sexy as i think it is

Charlie: not feverish, but i'm exhausted from my shift

Raquel: and hopefully I don't end up sounding like dora the explorer

Raquel: Do you want me to come over and take care of you?

Charlie: i'm sure you won't. everything you do turns out sexy. or almost everything.

Charlie: you could come here to cuddle in bed

Raquel: almost everything?

Raquel: okay but in the morning we go out to breakfast. I want waffles before I have to drag myself to the gym.

Charlie: it's not exactly sexy when you're deprived of coffee in general

Charlie: waffles? i could get them in the morning so we can eat them at my place, and you'll need coffee

Raquel: well the monster that comes out when I don't have coffee isn't me. I don't know her.

Raquel: yes, waffles. So you want to leave me in bed alone long enough for you to get waffles or are we going to bug ubereats or postmates food delivery early in the morning?

Charlie: that monster isn't sexy, you're the sexy one

Charlie: we could get them delivered while i make coffee to not have to deal with that monster for our damn sake

Raquel: well I have to try and match your sexy, handsome.

Raquel: I'm sorry for everything I say when I haven't had caffeine but don't leave me. 😘

Charlie: trust me, you already do it

Charlie: i know it's not you so you're fine. i guess i won't leave you while i make coffee tomorrow

Raquel: well good. If I don't bring my looks into this people might start wondering how I got to be with you.

Raquel: you can always just carry me into the kitchen. I'll wait patiently on the counter while you make my coffee.

Charlie: maybe it's the other way around, maybe people wonder what did to get to be with a hot piece of ass

Charlie: good, sit on the counter while i make coffee for us. that's a great view to make breakfast to, if you ask me

Raquel: well if anyone has any questions they should ask because I'll just tell them that it's because of your huge cock I love to ride. Or I'll be good and say it's because you're kind and compassionate and make me feel like a princess. You know the boring stuff.

Raquel: if you're lucky there just might be a makeout session in it for you.

Charlie: so you're with me for the cock, huh? and then the boring stuff

Charlie: only a makeout session?

Raquel: yep. I'm only with you because of your cock. What can I say? I'm shallow.

Raquel: well that all depends on how lucky you want to get.

Charlie: i'm flattered, but i hope you don't want to be with me now only because of my cock

Charlie: i aim for shower sex after breakfast, but i can settle for a makeout

Raquel: hmm there are a few other things like how you make me laugh and how I feel like I can tell you anything. Maybe it's because when I'm in your arms I feel safe and how you believe in me more than anyone that's in my life. I'm with you for so many reasons that I don't think I can ever finish telling you.

Raquel: Well we would be conserving water so if I say yes it's only because I'm trying to be eco friendly.

Charlie: you're being cheesy again here, Nacho

Charlie: eco friendly, conservating water. that's a nice reason to do it

Raquel: so what? You love it.

Raquel: and only for that reason obviously. It has nothing to do with the fact that I love the sound of our moans echoing in your bathroom.

Charlie: i will never admit that in public, but i'm getting used to it

Charlie: or with all the nudity involved we shouldn't have in the kitchen while i'm making you coffee because that's distracting

Raquel: I could always go back to not telling you how I feel all the time. And Im only giving it a matter of time before you'll be admitting a lot of things in public.

Raquel: so you're saying I have to wear clothes in the kitchen?

Charlie: i won't admit them in public. yet. but it happens that i don't only want you because of the sex or the hot body

Charlie: i never said you had to. i'd get distracted, but i could also take that as a source of inspiration

Raquel: really? Well what else is there to want?

Raquel: well then I guess I'll just have to be your muse because there is no way I'll be putting clothes on. Unless you offer one of your shirts because then that's a little different.

Charlie: you're funny, you're smart, you make me laugh, and even when you're deprived of coffee, you're cute

Charlie: you look hot with my shirts, especially when they're open and i can see your boobs

Charlie: my coffee muse, that sounds even good

Raquel: well when you say it like that, why am I not dating myself?

Raquel: you're just lucky your shirts are really comfortable.

Raquel: well if Im just a muse for coffee I need to step my game up. I'd like to be your muse for a lot of things

Charlie: because you can't date yourself, silly

Charlie: i'm really lucky. so, what is it going to be: a shirt or fully naked?

Charlie: for what things, babe?

Raquel: oh. Right. I guess it is a good thing I'm dating you then.

Raquel: shirt.

Raquel: like maybe that bar thing we talked about...

Charlie: technically, we're not there yet, but we're almost there, babe

Charlie: good choice.

Charlie: you'll get at least a cocktail with your name of it before someone else does it... and you'll probably see yourself in other parts of the bar

Charlie: after all, you're the one who's encouraging me to do this

Raquel: well we're as good as dating.

Raquel: I really thought you would have wanted the alternative

Raquel: so it isn't something you haven't thought about? Of course I'm encouraging you. I want you to be successful. And what do you mean by other parts of the bar?

Charlie: it's like we're dating already, babe. only that we're not official

Charlie: of course i want it, but then i wouldn't get to see you taking my shirt off, unbuttoning it until i get to see your boobs. plus, your legs are still showing, so it's almost like seeing you naked

Charlie: well, i haven't thought of myself owning a bar myself before or i had no one believing in me that much.

Charlie: i haven't really thought about that, if i have to be honest. but i'm pretty sure you'll inspire me in some way or another

Raquel: who needs facebook for your relationship to be official?

Raquel: that is a plus. You get to take your shirt off me. Are you saying I'm all legs because I'm not sure how to take that.

Raquel: I think you can do anything really and if it's not owning a bar then it's something great. I just think owning a bar would be payback for all of the hours you've already put in.

Raquel: I'll do my best.

Charlie: you know what i mean, babe

Charlie: yeah, that's hot. i meant that you have amazing legs. and an amazing ass. and an amazing body overall

Charlie: you're so supportive of me. i will work on that idea and we'll see what happens. i can't deny i'd love to be my own boss someday.

Raquel: right well that's not stopping me from calling you mine.

Raquel: okay then I know how to take that. Feel free to mark whatever you think is yours

Raquel: I love it, and the thought of my boyfriend owning a bar is a major turn on. That and I think I'd like seeing a building with your name on the side.

Charlie: feel free to do that, babe

Charlie: you know i'll do that anyways

Charlie: oh, so power, even if it is over a local, turns you on too?

Raquel: I already am.

Raquel: can't wait.

Raquel: no, you always turn me on, but the thought of both of us being successful and you having something that's yours and that you're passionate about turns me on too.

Charlie: good, that way i'll be used to it by the time we're actually there

Charlie: i have a question, can i mark your neck? i miss marking your neck

Charlie: i'm trying my best to not say anything cocky right now, but it's good to know you think that

Raquel: as if you aren't used to it now.

Raquel: marking my neck was never supposed to be a thing. Covering those in general is hard to do

Raquel: you not saying the cocky thing you're thinking is a first. I might have even been expecting it.

Charlie: busted

Charlie: i think that's fair. let me know when i can do that because i miss leaving hickeys there. i already to that in your inner thighs, but you know

Charlie: i'm a box full of surprises, aren't i?

Raquel: I KNEW IT.

Raquel: what if I say you can't give me hickeys on my neck ever. Even if we're together?

Raquel: either that or that entire year we were together actually was me learning everything about you.

Charlie: shut up

Charlie: then that's pure torture, babe. your neck is way too good to not leave any marks on it

Charlie: i like that thing. it sounds even good

Raquel: nope. You want to be my boyfriend and you want to kiiiss me.

Raquel: so you're saying there's no way you can't resist me? You make me look like a leper and I can't wear a scarf during the summer.

Raquel: well it also means that that year we were together actually meant a lot to me.

Charlie: so what if i do, huh? because i do and you know it

Charlie: wear your hickeys like badges, like i do everytime you leave one

Charlie: it was a good year, it was great in a lot of aspects for me.

Raquel: if you do want to kiss me then you definitely should every time you want.

Raquel: except it's hot when I leave hickies on your neck. Not so much when they're on me.

Raquel: really? And I thought you once said you weren't the relationship type.

Charlie: oh, i will do that. all the time and as soon as you get here. because you're still coming over, right?

Charlie: why it's not hot when i leave them on yours? it really is

Charlie: i wasn't. maybe you changed me in that aspect

Raquel: of course I'm still coming over. I said I would and since you said you were tired I'm already planning on pleasing my man with a nice massage so be prepared

Raquel: because then I get all the dirty looks and casting agents don't really want to see me with hickies on my neck. So if you do want to make me up at least don't leave really dark ones I can't cover up.

Raquel: maybe but you changed my life a lot too.

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Indie

Rio: 🎂🎁🎊 Rio: Your Birthday present is here! Rio: And no, it isn't just me with a 🎀 Indie: 💖💖💖💖💖 Rio: Withhold your blatant disappointment on that score and get your glad rags on, baby girl! Rio: I got it sorted for you at XS, whoever you show up with tonight, gonna look the other way when it comes to ID Indie: wicked idea and im mad grateful but and watched you dont get vexed but im gonna have to dash on that Indie: private party happening, innit Rio: Awh 😞 I really can't convince you??? Rio: Who got in there before me and with a better offer Rio: AND HOW Rio: I must know! Indie: nah can't bail on this Indie: rudeboy would never handle it Rio: I know the feeling Rio: so gutted 💔 Rio: won't be right, when'd my baby get so grown? Indie: ive kept him hanging long til the date cos hes got years on me Indie: girl i always been grown Indie: this just a formality like Rio: umm how many years we talking here Indie: idk what am i the feds Indie: jam its chill Rio: yeah bitch it won't be chill when the actual show up Rio: the jailbait nickname ain't meant to be more than that Rio: he's like what, my age, then??? Indie: allow it Indie: you gotta have trust Rio: on no info Rio: i weren't born yesterday Rio: or 15 years ago even Rio: where'd you meet then? name? anything? Indie: you don't need to use me to prove your perv radar still works after the recent blip Rio: alright, fair Rio: but how sneaky you're being says it all so Rio: don't do anything stupid, yeah? Indie: cos i dont want you all in my birthday business Indie: I'm not a kid I can handle my own Rio: Clearly not, if you're meeting up with some random creep Rio: I'm not trying to be all up on you if that's not what you want but I can still see you have a good time with or without Rio: and at the very least, make sure you're safe, standard Indie: weird flex when you want someone to roll with or to score for you Indie: not a kid then innit Indie: and you aren't my ma so stop being extra Rio: Don't be a dick Rio: as if I've ever used you Indie: you and your fam striking at me first Rio: what? Indie: give me air im just shook for my celebrations Rio: don't go Rio: come to the club Rio: i won't even be there Indie: nah i gotta Indie: it'll be off the hook when i get there like Rio: cool Rio: keep me posted, yeah? Indie: when i dont get owned i'll send you an i told you so Indie: 😂 Rio: Cheeky bitch Rio: Just tryna look at for you, smalls Indie: but i didn't ask so you can't tell Indie: dems the rules Rio: I don't have to play by the rules, honey Rio: 🤷 Indie: ✌ Rio: [Later] Rio: Give me one good reason I shouldn't come over there right now and beat his ass back into last century where he came from Indie: me Indie: if you wanna beef with me come through Rio: THIS IS ILLEGAL INDIE Rio: even if it weren't, it's so fucking sketchy Rio: if he's happy to go out WITH A CHILD, who knows what else sick shit he's happy to do Rio: you need to leave now Indie: you a fed now? didnt realise we had a new jakes in the ends Indie: he thinks im 18 so you need to chill and let me get paid Rio: Yeah, sure he does Rio: You don't look it so I'm about as fooled by him as he is you Rio: This is serious Rio: If you want money, I'll give you it, fuck this shit Indie: it's no big thing Indie: we aren't gonna mash its just dinner and drinks Indie: stay out of my way on this Rio: are you mad Rio: who am i suddenly that you think that's even an option Indie: who am i that you think i need to sos you Rio: you never ask for help Rio: but you don't need to for it to be there or be warranted Rio: i'm serious, you don't wanna get in shit for this Rio: you'll be lucky if you've not been clocked by staff and they've got the garda on the way Rio: if they think you're doing more than you are, you're fucked Rio: just leave, please Indie: i'll go cos ive slipped with this posh nosh and am marvin still not cos everythings on top Rio: you swear Rio: 'cos you know I'll come through Indie: im out Indie: stay where you're at Rio: alright Rio: fucking hell girl Indie: don't let it kill your vibe Rio: i'm not bothered about that Rio: what was yours going out like that, like? Indie: 🤑🤑 Rio: of all the ways though, babe Rio: i'd put it behind the bar, like, you woulda been sorted, not that crap at gifts Indie: i dont want yours Rio: why not Rio: it isn't an IOU Indie: cos im trying to earn my own Rio: Then we work out a way that doesn't involve underage sex work Indie: shut up Rio: Come on then babe, sort it out Indie: don't babe or ma me Rio: You acting it, you gonna get it 👶🍼 Indie: in this case never better than too late Indie: leave me out of your guilty parenting Rio: Never Indie: have a word with just yourself then Indie: im out of here too Rio: Catch you later tomorrow Indie: dont know where im be Indie: text me first Rio: will do