#heart problems run in the family and a close family member has already had a heart attack at a young age
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I saw a tik tok by a medical professional joking about how hard it is to do chest compressions and I have a certificate in CPR but I got it like seven years ago now and I barely remember the actual lession so I set a timer and went through the motions (sans dummy I was literally just bouncing on the carpet) and I could only do compressions for a minute before I had to stop, so guess what my new work out is
#if I'm lucky I'll never have to perform cpr#but if someone else is unlucky I want to be able to help them#heart problems run in the family and a close family member has already had a heart attack at a young age#I wanna be prepared
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˗ˏˋ BARBELL BACKDRAFT ˎˊ˗
lighter lorenz x f reader
wc : <1k
warnings : reader has pierced nipples, inappropriate fantasy, oral sex, cum, spit, mentions of swallowing, pet names (good girl), lmk if I missed anything
this was literally just an excuse to write about him absolutely cranking that thang crazy style (also a backdraft is a flaming shot of liquor I thought I was being clever) lighter nation I present my humble offering <3
He knew he shouldn't be thinking about you like this. You of all people, a fellow member of the gang and someone who (to his knowledge) has never expressed any kind of interest in him that stepped over general familial affection. It doesn't even matter and it doesn't matter how much shame he feels stuck to his skin in the light of day, especially when you give him one of those beaming smiles bounding up to him chatting about who knows what.
All that matters right now is the crystal clear mental image of your nipples through your shirt, the barbells pierced through the flesh perfectly accentuated by the tight fabric. Fuck he'd almost moaned out loud this afternoon catching a glorious eye full of them, and seeing you kick up into a run over towards Piper? It was a game, set, match in less than ten seconds.
He'd had to excuse himself for the rest of the day and all of the evening with a lame lie of sudden allergies. No way he would be able to calm himself down enough to spend any time around you and all the others without rocking a massive erection and that was a topic he would rather die than speak about to a group of chortling girls. As much as he loved all of them, his pride would bear the wound forever.
That's not even touching on the fact that he'd rather cut off and eat his own fingers than admit the cause of this massive problem was your unfairly gorgeous chest and how he felt on the verge of a heart attack knowing they were pierced. Did you do that for yourself or for someone else? If so, who caught your eye and would it be a terrible decision to beat them senseless in the name of usurping that spot in your mind?
Those wanton moans bounced around the room freely now though, his dick throbbing painfully in his hand as he gave it a few languid strokes. Eyes closed it was unfortunately very easy to envision you shirtless; those glorious steel barbells glinting off the weak light in his bedroom like cherries on top of a deliciously pillowy scoop of ice cream. You seem like the type to find being on your knees enjoyable, a thought that should make him feel guilty again but such emotions are powerless in the face of naked lust.
Spit dripped, sloppy and attached to his bottom lip in glistening strands, as his pace picked up and hushed grunts filled the room. Would your hair be as nice as he imagined, if he slid his hand around to the back of your head to keep you still and let him use that perfect mouth of yours to his hearts content?
His eyes squeeze shut so tightly abstract fuzzy shapes flash behind the lids as his breathing stutters, feeling his abdomen and balls tightening up the more he indulges in the fantasy. Fuck you'd be even prettier like that, cheeks all hallowed out as you let him fuck your throat with all he's got.
The throbbing in his dick matches pace with his hand now, furiously stroking up and down so fast it's probably just an ambiguous blur from an outside perspective. Are you the type to spit or swallow? Nah, who cares when his real prize would be painting your tits in milky white streaks, watching it stick to the metal of those nipple piercings... Could he suck it off, flick his tongue around that little bud and make you arch your back, shove them even further into his face?
He bets you sound so sweet when you feel good, his fingers would dip down into your panties (which he already knows you prefer black silk after one day you decided to borrow a skirt from Burnice and unknowingly gave all of Blazewood a to die for view of your ass, much to his delight) and he already knows you'd be a sticky, soaked mess in his lap. Would you be a good girl, pop open those lips and suck his fingers clean for him? Yeah, he bets you would.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
There's just something about you that turns him into the lowest form of pervert, breathlessly beating his dick like it's going out of fashion. But he'd be a liar if he said the adrenaline of how inappropriate these fantasies were wasn't addicting, nearly as addicting as his habit of "keeping an eye on you" (really meaning filing away a variety of moments for later use, like now). He'd trade away honor and pride, all that shit, for just ten minutes alone with you. Ten minutes to have you exactly the way he wants.
As one long groan turns into a harsh through the nose exhale, his pace slows down the more his hand gets coated in spurts of hot, sticky cum. His hips stutter before he's sure he's spent, collapsing backwards from the edge of the mattress to starfish in the center as his breathing slowly evens back out. Olive green eyes remain glued to the ceiling, but all he can truly see in his field of view is you with your tongue out and his cum splashed all over your tits flashing him one of those pretty smiles for giving you all he's got.
He knows this is a problem that isn't gonna go away until it reaches a head, like catching a firm right hook to the jaw. He can only hope he doesn't end up sucker punched if and when he does work up any nerve to test the waters with you.
First thing though is finding out why you got those piercings in the first place because if it was for someone else, well, he's not above an old fashioned duel for your hand. Who knows, maybe you're secretly into that kind of thing.
With an exhausted half smile to himself he shimmies down his jeans the rest of the way, lazily kicking them off before fully crawling into bed. As he tugs down one of the pillows, curling his arms around it and breathing in deeply, he can't help but think about a different sort of fantasy now: how good it would feel to have you right here, one of his old ratty shirts clinging to your skin and smelling just like him.
He'll work up the nerve to get there, in his own way.
#zzz smut#zzz x reader#zenless zone zero smut#zenless zone zero x reader#lighter lorenz#lighter lorenz x reader#lighter lorenz smut#zzz lighter
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Kate mini version
Sharma!sis x Queen Charlotte's son
Summary: After the ball, everyone knows what happened between Y/n and Prince Charles. With the attention of high society members and the Queen, they face new obstacles as they fall in love.
part 1 part 2 part 3
Dearest reader,
The tone is abuzz with the latest gossip, and so it's my honor to impart to you.
Miss Y/n Sharma came to England after Kate Sharma's marriage to Viscount Bridgerton. In such a short time she managed to do something that no one else has managed to do: capture the attention of Queen Charlotte's youngest son, Prince Charles.
Dearest reader, this author finds herself compelled to share the most curious of news. It seems the two seemed to be quite close during the last dance, having danced together until Y/n walked away. But Prince Charles didn't take his eyes off the young woman for the rest of the night. Is a new romance brewing? Let's not forget that at the beginning of the season, her Majesty made her intentions clear of joining her youngest son with the princess of Austria.
In addition, Miss Y/n is here at her mother's request, living with her older sister, Kate Bridgerton, and her husband, Lord Bridgerton. Is it permanent or will she return to India? There are many mysteries yet to be unraveled.
On the other hand, the diamond of the season did not dance with any suitor, which may have made her Majesty uneasy. This author is left to wonder what shall her next move be, now that everything seems to be connected to the Bridgerton family.
Yours truly, Lady Whistledown
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
"This is not good." Y/n muttered nervously, looking over Kate's shoulder to read the latest edition of Lady Whistledown. And to his greatest horror, she was the main topic. "How many people read this?"
"Too many." the older sister sighed, before placing the paper next to her and turning to Y/n who had her eyes increasingly wide. "Everything's fine. Most of the family has already suffered from Lady Whistledown's words and we support each other. And everything ended up being fine, the ton has short memory and will forget all about this by the next scandal."
"But what if they don't forget?"
"If they don't forget what?" a new voice intruded into the conversation.
Y/n let out a small scream, immediately recognizing Anthony's voice, and hurried to hide the paper behind her back. "Nothing. It's a beautiful day, I'm going to the gardens. Maybe hide there all day. Or all year."
"Y/n, no. You have to tell Anthony, he won't blame you for anything."
Bridgerton's eyebrows rose upon hearing that, turning to Y/n with a frown upon noticing her terrified expression. "What happened?"
"My apologies, Anthony. The last thing I wanted to do was associate the name Bridgerton with scandals. Lady Whistledown wrote about last night. About… About Prince Charles and I." She looked down, not wanting to see Anthony's disapproving look, and handed him the paper.
The minutes dragged on. To Y/n it felt like hours had passed. Long hours with just the silence in the room. Her heart was pounding against her chest and she tried to control the tears from reaching her eyes. Her head was running with different questions that only made her anxiety worse. Would they send her back to India so they wouldn't suffer any more from this scandal? She didn't know that dancing with someone could cause so many problems.
Just the thought of returning to her homeland, despite having loved growing up there, brought her great sadness. Her life was in England now. She adored her sister's family, having grown up close to many of them, especially Francesca and Hyacinth. And the truth is that she had enjoyed meeting Prince Charles. Y/n finally felt like she belonged somewhere.
She snapped out of these thoughts when she heard Anthony sigh. What was that? Disappointment? Anger? Sadness?
"Look at me." he said, but Y/n refused, knowing that as soon as she looked at the couple she would burst into tears. She shook her head, pursing her lips. "Y/n…"
"Please don't send me back to India."
"What?" the Viscount questioned in shock, almost not having noticed her from how quietly she spoke. He felt Kate hold his hand, looking sadly at her sister. "Y/n, look at us. We are not going to send you back to India."
"Really?" She raised her head shyly, her eyes red from holding back tears.
"Of course. You're part of the family. I haven't told you yet, but Mama sent a letter. Edwina had problems during the birth, so she's going to stay there until at least the rest of the year. You're going to stay with us. Here."
"Y/n, we would never send you away because of Lady Whistledown's news. You're a Bridgerton now." Anthony assured, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. Her smile upon hearing those words, although still small, released some of the stress that Anthony and Kate were feeling.
"Hey, Anthony, I was wondering— Oh, sorry!" Hyacinth entered the room, stopping when she saw the three of them and the tense atmosphere it was in. Then he noticed the sad face and the paper his brother was holding. "Is that from Lady Whistledown? What does it say?"
"It doesn't matter what it says. What did you want to tell me, Hyacinth?"
"Oh, I was wondering if we could go horse riding. I am so bored, Gregory is training and Benedict isn't paying attention to me." she pouted, causing Y/n to giggle and rush over to Hyacinth, intertwining their arms.
"Fear no more, I shall give you attention."
"Thank you, kind lady." Hyacinth laughed. "Please, Anthony, take us horse riding."
When he offered to teach Y/n how to ride a horse, the rest of his sisters were also invited, since the men already knew how to do it. As expected, only Hyacinth accepted with great enthusiasm while Eloise preferred to read and spend her time with her new friend, Miss Cressida. For her part, Francesca was never much for outdoor sports and Daphne was obviously busy with her husband and son. Thus, Y/n and the youngest Bridgerton both formed a special friendship, and were now a feared duo in the Bridgerton house.
"What do you say?" he whispered in his wife's ear, looking at the two girls who were giving them the best puppy dog eyes. "I'm afraid I can't say no to them."
"I think it's a great idea." Kate smiled.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
The four then ventured into the forest. Anthony and Kate were ahead, lost in their own world while Hyacinth and Y/n followed a little behind. The younger girl curiously questioned Sharma about the night of the ball, upset that she was still too young to attend one.
"I wish I had gone yesterday. Did you dance with someone yesterday? I tried to ask Francesca the same thing, but she wouldn't leave her room."
"Unexpected things happened. Francesca is just a little discouraged. As diamond of the season, she has a lot of pressure on her. And I… Well, I danced with someone."
"Prince Charles?! I saw you both when we went for a picnic, I think it was love at first sight." Hyacinth giggled.
"Sometimes I forget how good an observer you are. Yes, I danced with him." Before her friend could get too excited, Y/n hurried to add. "And I was naive, because although I enjoyed being with him, he has an enormous responsibility. I doubt people would want him to spend his time with me."
"Please, I think you are in love."
"What? Of course not, I barely know him. We just had fun dancing, but that must be over by now. I doubt her Majesty will let him dance with me again. Lady Whistledown made sure of that."
"If you say so. I, on the other hand, do not agree. Prince Charles has shown that he is interested in you. Or he would have danced with other girls after you. But he didn't."
"Well, maybe he was tired." Y/n shrugged, while Hyacinth rolled her eyes. They continued the walk in silence, enjoying the forest landscape.
“Girls, let’s do a race!” Anthony shouted, looking over his shoulder with a smirk. Y/n chuckled, knowing he had never met a family as competitive as the Bridgertons. But she was one now too, and she loved winning.
“Very well. But make sure you don’t get too sad when I win.” Hyacinth teased, despite being the one with the least experience riding a horse.
“We’ll see.” Kate joined the teasing.
The four positioned themselves next to each other, letting the man count down. Y/n grabbed the reins tighter, and as soon as Anthony finished, she let her horse run. For a moment they were all balanced, but Hyacinth quickly fell behind. The couple competed a little ahead, trying to reach a certain narrower entrance. So, with their attention diverted from her, she took the opportunity to step over a fallen tree trunk, arriving earlier at that entrance, continuing at the same pace.
She felt free on a horse. The wind hit their face, the landscape blurred from how fast they were going. Y/n petted the animal, feeling like they could conquer the world.
When she realized that the others had already stopped, as no one had yet reached her, she also slowed down so she could wait for them to catch up. They probably had to go back to help Hyacinth control her horse.
“That was impressive.” she heard behind her.
Although she felt a second of fear, thinking that an unknown man had found her alone in the middle of the forest, she quickly associated it with the voice of the person she least wanted to see at that moment. As such, she just closed her eyes and hoped it was just her imagination. But when he cleared his throat, she knew she had to face him. Finally, she commanded the horse to turn around, finding herself face to face with Prince Charles, who was also on top of a beautiful black horse.
“Prince Charles, it’s a pleasure to see you again.” she smiled shyly.
“You as well, Miss Y/N. I didn’t know you were so talented at riding. Did Lady Bridgerton teach you?”
“She and Viscount Bridgerton. And since then I haven’t wanted anything else.” she shrugged uncomfortably, both not knowing what to say. In this way, Y/n focused on the horse that the prince was riding, being shocked by its size. “Beautiful.” She looked at Charles, noticing his look of surprise and a slight blush appearing on his cheeks. “I mean, the horse— The horse is beautiful.”
“Of course.” he looked away, clearing his throat. “It seems we both had the same idea after the paper published by Lady Whistledown. A nice walk was exactly what I needed to get away from my mother.”
“My apologies, I didn’t mean to interfere with your marriage with the Princess of Austria.”
“Her Majesty wants me to marry her. But I don't. You see, a beautiful, fierce, remarkable girl has already caught my attention. It may seem sudden, but she is constantly in my thoughts.” he looked intensely into her eyes. Out of nowhere, it seemed like it had become much hotter, her breathing coming in muffled.
“Oh… I—”
“Y/n! Where are you?” Kate's voice was heard through the forest, breaking the atmosphere that had formed between them.
“I’m here, Kate.” Y/n replied, closing her eyes in despair when she realized that she would have a lot to explain once they arrived.
She had already taken a risk with Lady Whistledown, and now they were alone in an isolated place… It's a good thing no one outside the family would see them, or the scandal would have become much more serious. A feeling of guilt coursed through her body again. She had promised Anthony that she didn't want to associate the Bridgerton name with scandals, and here she was doing exactly the opposite.
“Prince Charles, we can’t talk anymore. It’s not right.” she said before the others appeared.
“Why not? Because of Lady Whistledown? Ignore her, the ton will quickly forget about this.”
“You don’t know that!” Y/n exclaimed exasperated at how calm Charles seemed to be about this situation.
“I know that I want to be with you.”
“You are crazy!” she put her hand over her mouth when she realized that she had “insulted” a member of the royal family. “Apologies, Prince Charles. I didn’t mean that.”
“Call me Charles.”
“I take back my apologies.”
“Finally, we found you, Y/N. We had to go back because Hyacinth’s horse refused to move.” Kate appeared, followed by the others, stopping when she saw what was happening. She made a small bow, looking at them suspiciously. “Prince Charles, I didn’t expect to see you here. Especially with my sister.”
“What do you think you are doing?” Anthony wasn't as friendly as his wife, narrowing his eyes and approaching Y/n to stand slightly in front of her.
“Lord Bridgerton, I guarantee nothing happened. I was simply, like you, taking a walk when I saw Miss Y/n. We only talk about what Lady Whistledown wrote.” Charles assured, sending a comforting smile to Y/n, who was watching the two nervously.
“It was mere chance that we found each other. We can go back to the house now.”
Anthony signaled to Kate, who nodded. They had mastered the art of speaking with just their eyes, it still left Y/n quite confused when they did that. But this time, she understood perfectly. Lowering her head slightly, she followed her sister and Hyacinth home, while Anthony and Charles remained behind. Over her shoulder, she mumbled a quick apology to the boy, hoping he would understand what she meant.
When the women were out of sight, Anthony turned to the Prince , who appeared unaffected. “I hope you’re not trying to ruin my wife’s sister’s reputation. You know very well what the ton would say if they found you in this situation. And I guarantee you, you don’t want to duel me.”
“I agree. That's the last thing I desire. Miss Y/n would certainly never speak to me again. And I don't want that. Lord Bridgerton, we were just talking, and on horses for more. But, for all the respect I have for Miss Y/n and the Bridgerton family, I assure you this will never happen again.”
"It better not."
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
After a tense conversation with Kate and Anthony, they believed Y/n when she said it was a coincidence to meet Prince Charles, but that she understood the gravity of being alone with a man.
So, she spent a few days locked up at home, hoping that the scandal had already been forgotten. However, this isolation couldn't last forever, so she was forced to join the Bridgerton family on a walk by the lake.
She had her arm linked with Benedict's, Eloise beside her, while they listened to Collin's travel stories. He had seen so much, experienced so many new cultures, that Y/n just wanted to know more. Eloise, in turn, seemed envious that only men could have the pleasure of traveling alone wherever they wanted, and Benedict asked about the art of each country, something that Y/n barely understood.
However, Collin ended up rushing the end of the story, seeing a group of girls walking, giggling when they saw him. Eloise groaned in disgust, while Benedict shook his head, changing direction so he wouldn't have to watch his brother flirt. Y/n also went with them, not wanting to see that scene.
But she noticed that they had been stopped by Lady Wilson, whose daughter was participating in the season along with Y/n, Francesca, and Eloise. "Good afternoon, Lady Wilson."
"Good afternoon." she said. "I noticed you didn't go to the ball yesterday. I haven't yet had a chance to talk with Lady Bridgerton to know if everything is alright."
"Thank you for your concern." Benedict said sarcastically, taking control since Anthony wasn't around. "We had other matters to attend, but I assure you that we will be present at the ball tomorrow."
"That's wonderful news." the woman said with a fake smile. "In that case you will be able to see my daughter dancing with Prince Charles, just like yesterday. They form a beautiful couple, don't you think?"
Y/n had to control herself not to roll her eyes. It was clear what Lady Wilson was trying to do, but there would be no reaction from her. Eloise and Benedict looked at her from the corner of their eyes, waiting to know if Y/n needed them to interrupt the conversation.
"I don't know. I didn't see them together nor did I have the opportunity to know about it since Lady Whistledown didn't write about them. And we all know that she writes about everything that happens, and it seems especially important if the prince is interested in someone to court. Looks like we'll have to wait and see."
"Yes, we shall wait." Lady Wilson clenched her jaw. "I'm certain that the prince loved to dance with my daughter."
"If you say so. Please excuse us, we shall return to the rest of our family." Y/n said dryly, hurrying to walk in the opposite direction with the two Bridgertons behind her.
"Jealous, dear sister?" Benedict asked with a sly smile once they were far enough away from the woman.
"No. Why would I be?" Y/n pretended not to be bothered, but in reality the thought of Charles dancing with someone else didn't sit very well with her. But what could she be expecting, she had said that they shouldn't talk anymore and he had to get married this season. "I'm just surprised that Lady Wilson is so confident in her daughter with the prince when the Queen wants him with the princess of Austria."
"Hmm." was the only response she received from Benedict. Eloise, already fed up with just hearing about the season, changed the subject and Y/n was also grateful for that. The last thing she wanted was to think about the next ball.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
"What are you going to do?" Hyacinth asked as she helped Y/n and Francesca get ready for ball. The two had already put on their dresses and now all that was left was the jewelry. Kate had already come to say that they would have to leave soon, smiling calmly when she noticed the nervous state of her sister who had changed her dress about five times already.
“About what?”
“About the prince, obviously.”
“I don’t know. I am a little confused. This is all happening so quickly. And the fact that Lady Whistledown wrote about us didn't help. But the truth is that when I'm with him, I don't know, I feel different.” Y/n tried to explain, but realized she couldn't describe her feelings in words. It was something foreign to her, but not unwanted.
“I know what it is. You like him.” the Bridgerton dropped onto the bed dramatically.
“But liking may not be enough. Don't forget that the Queen has a lot of influence on these things. And I wouldn’t want to piss her off, it would only hurt all of you.”
"You are exaggerating. Francesca, what do you think of this?”
“What?” the girl snapped out of her thoughts when she heard her name. “Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.”
“What are you thinking about?” Y/n sat next to her, taking her hand.
“I haven't had almost any suitors yet. And the ones I have seem incapable of having a conversation. What if I don’t find anyone?” Francesca revealed with a sigh, her voice tinged with sadness.
“Nonsense. Everyone would love to dance with you. In fact, I have a feeling you are going to meet someone today.” the Sharma said. “And for that to happen, we must leave and go to this ball. If you need to, we can stay together all night.”
“Thank you, but it won’t be necessary. I want you to have your chance with the prince.”
“After all, you were listening!” Hyacinth exclaimed, groaning as the two left the room and left her there. Now she had to wait until tomorrow to find out everything that was going to happen!
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
The ball was already full of people, from nervous mothers to innocent daughters who giggled when a suitor asked them to dance. Y/n and Francesca walked in together, both of them taking deep breaths and looking at each other in encouragement. They could do this.
While Francesca's nerves increased as she saw the Queen's eyes fall on her, Y/n's heart began to beat faster when she noticed Charles, who was standing next to his mother. However, he was not alone, finding himself in conversation with the princess of Austria. From what the Sharma could understand from the few moments in which she let herself focus on them, they seemed to be getting along well, sharing polite smiles.
"Maybe we shall get a refreshment first?" Y/n said, seeing that the family had already dispersed.
"A great idea." Francesca swallowed, nodding several times.
The two hurried to a corner of the room, sending a quick smile to the people passing by. Fortunately, no one engaged them in a long conversation, allowing them to mentally prepare themselves to face that night.
They stopped next to Penelope, who looked at the dancing couples with a sad look. "Are you alright, Penelope?"
"Yes, of course, Francesca." the redhead replied shyly, offering a small smile to the two girls. "You ought to take the floor."
"Ought we?" the Bridgerton chuckled humorlessly.
"Once one finds oneself on the wall, it is difficult to come off it. No matter what one does." Penelope looked down, pursing her lips.
"Better to be on the wall than to make fools of ourselves." Y/n she murmured, discreetly looking at the boy who had invaded her heart, still talking to the beautiful princess. Only this time, almost feeling her gaze on him, he glanced at her, showing what appeared to be a genuine smile. "This is so confusing."
"I agree. At least the wall doesn't ask me about what makes me tick." Francesca complained, still upset about the failed conversations from the last ball. The older girl looked at her understandingly, noticing that Francesca was more reserved. Maybe that was what made her rare, different from all the other girls.
"And why are you on the wall, Penelope? I'm sure there are lots of gentlemen here who would be more than willing to ask for your hand in a dance!"
"Oh no. Nobody wants to dance with me. Believe me." she replied with a slight blush, embarrassed that she didn't have any suitors when this wasn't her first season, unlike them.
"They must be blind, then. You are beautiful." Y/n confessed honestly, really confused that they let such an incredible person like Penelope escape. If she could, she would drag the redhead and Francesca to dance, but she knew it was against the rules.
The three fell into a silence, not uncomfortable, but as if they all had more to think about than trying to carry on a conversation. From the other side of the room, Charles watched Sharma as if in a trance, quickly leaving the conversation he was having to go to meet her.
However, he was interrupted by Charlotte who discreetly held his arm. "What are you doing? Must I remind you that you shall marry this season?"
"Why are you putting so much pressure on me with this. You have so many other children, but I'm the only one who has to suffer with this."
"Your siblings reproducing bastards for me to ignore. You are my last hope, son. I have made sure to give so many heirs to your father, and none of my children seem to be fornicating." she said. When she noticed that she was being too harsh with her youngest son, she sighed. "Bridgerton, Charles?"
"What seems to be the problem? You've already accepted many of their marriages, including naming two Bridgertons as diamonds of the season and ignoring the scandal between Lord Bridgerton and Lady Bridgerton." Charles controlled himself not to roll his eyes.
"Yes… But that was until my son was mentioned in the paper of Lady Whistledown because he was just interested in a girl. Especially when the princess of Austria traveled here just to meet you."
"And I enjoyed meeting her. But I enjoyed much more meeting Y/n Sharma." he admitted, his voice conveying the confidence he felt in those words. "She's the one I want. The one I'll follow to the end of the world if necessary. Don't make me marry someone else, mom, I want her. Just her."
"I believe the boy is in love." Lady Dandbury appeared beside them, looking at the boy with knowing eyes. Charlotte glanced at her from the corner of her eye. "The dance they shared was remarkable. The London Season is already terribly monotonous as it is. Therefore, these cases of passion make it more enjoyable. Don't you agree?"
"Indeed, Lady Danbury." Charles nodded, appreciating her help in convincing the Queen. "May I go now?"
Charlotte watched him for a few moments, noticing how he was restless, his body tilted towards Y/n. Almost as if he had no control over himself, unconsciously wanting to always be close to her. This wait was killing him.
The woman didn't respond verbally, just offered a small nod of permission, and her son was gone in the blink of an eye.
Almost running, the prince arrived next to Y/n, who continued to watch people dancing. She was now only with Penelope, as Francesca was taken by Violet to meet some suitors. Charles approached silently, placing himself in her line of sight and simply offering her a hand.
"What are you doing?" she whispered with wide eyes. Beside her, Penelope excused herself, giving the couple space. Not that they paid much attention, appearing not to have even heard her.
"Isn't it obvious? I'm asking you to dance with me."
"You don't give up, do you?" Y/n let a small smile appear, pretending to be upset by the boy's persistence. Inwardly, her heart was beating furiously fast. She didn't want to dance. She wanted to get away from there so she could be with Charles alone, the two of them talking all night.
But their moment was interrupted by Lady Wilson's daughter, who suddenly appeared and grabbed the prince's arm. "Prince Charles, you promised me a dance. Shall we?"
Y/n took a step back, trying to hide her sadness. Charles hadn't even removed her arm from his. This was a reminder that Charles was not yet hers, and with her indecision, that was becoming increasingly difficult. He had so many good options for marriage, why would he choose her? What made her special from all the others?
Trying to make sure no one saw the tears that threatened to appear, the Sharma decided it was best to leave for the rest of the night. Perhaps Anthony and Kate would believe she was feeling unwell and needed to go home.
But before he could move away completely, Charles snapped out of his shock, grabbing Y/n's hand to pull her closer while shaking the other woman's hold.
He clenched his jaw, upset at not being able to have a single moment of peace with Y/n. "My apologies, Miss." Y/n had to put her hand over her mouth to hide her amusement when Charles didn't remember the girl's name. "Right now, I would like to dance with Miss Y/n. So if you will excuse us."
"But—"
"What do you say, Miss Y/n. Shall you give me the pleasure of having this dance?" Charles asked quickly before the annoying girl spoke again. His attention was on Sharma, who was looking at him adoringly. Was this what people felt when they were in love? It felt like he couldn't breathe. In a good way.
"We shall… Charles." she laughed. Charles' mouth opened in shock, appearing to have frozen to the ground. In a playful way, she rolled her eyes, guiding him to the dance floor, which was now empty as people saw the two walk there.
Despite the nerves she felt, Y/n felt good with Charles, so she decided to ignore ton's opinions on this. The boy bowed as he offered her his hand, followed by a bow from Y/n, and immediately the music began.
"You called me Charles."
"A very good observation."
"You know, I thought Lord Bridgerton would kill me the moment I looked at you. It would be worth it." he twirled her around, loving it when he heard her little giggles. When she landed on the ground, her eyes found Kate and Anthony watching them, but instead of upset, they looked happy that Y/n was happy. "I must say that when you said we couldn't meet again, it hurt."
"My deepest apologies. How could I have said such absurd things?" Y/n said dramatically, noticing Charles' amusement.
"All is well now. As long as you promise to not run anymore. Even if Lady Whistledown or someone else writes about us. I promise I won't let anything hurt you or your family."
Y/n focused on his eyes. They were honest and had a glow of adoration about them. "What about the Princess of Austria?"
"As I also told her Majesty, I have no interest in her. My heart already belongs to you, Y/n. No one else can take your place."
The music was slowing down, indicating that it would end soon. The boy gripped Y/n's waist tighter, fearing that he would have to let go when he was enjoying savoring every moment of their closeness.
"My heart belongs to you too, Charles." she scrunched her eyebrows and Charles could feel his heart close to bursting. He wanted to marry her.
Instead, he controlled himself from saying it right away, knowing that he would have to talk to Anthony first and ask for Y/n's hand in marriage. Or he feared the Bridgerton wrath. For now, having Y/n in his arms was enough.
#bridgerton#anthony bridgerton#anthony bridgerton x reader#benedict bridgerton#anthony bridgerton x you#bridgerton imagine#bridgerton x reader#collin bridgerton#daphne bridgerton#eloise bridgerton#kate sharma x reader#collin bridgerton x reader#benedict bridgerton x you#benedict bridgerton x reader
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I HAVE BEEN READING ZDARSKY BATMAN, AND I HAVE DECLARED: I FREAKING LOVE IT!!
I'm reading the Batman Zdarsky run in reverse. That way if I see any bull I can back out at anytime: and to be honest--besides a few things. I really enjoy it
LIKE YO, THAT IS JUST STRAIGHT UP TIM DRAKE RIGHT THERE. It knows who he is as a character. his motives, it's great.
Screw the people complaining "oh why is tim still robin :((", THIS IS WHY HE IS STILL ROBIN. Because this is when he's at his BEST. When he gets to hit his character purpose, WHEN HE GETS TO BE HIM AT HIS MOST HIM. It's FANTASTIC.
Reading in reverse because I know I hated the first story, it was so contrived and ridiculous.
But this--this is some good shit.
Tim being an underdog fighter, having to use his wits to win the fight? MY DAWG, MY DUDE, MY GUYS, MY GALS, MY THEMS, MY THEYS, THIS IS SO TIMMY DRAKE. This is so damn Tim Drake, guys. Oh, my gosh, I am loving this so far.
Dick has his temper back? And trust me, he isn't normally like this. But he's hitting a limit AND IT'S SOMETHING NEW, NOT JUST A REFERENCE. HE'S ACTUALLY DOING SOMETHING HE'D DO, 'CAUSE HE'S AT HIS LIMIT. That's wonderful, man. That is so wonderful.
Plus Tim is the heart of the Bat-Family again? This feels like someone actually went back to read these characters before writing it. I'm not saying everything is perfect of course, but these high marks are exceeding all my expectations. And I STOPPED reading comics because of how the beginning of this run destroyed any hope I had.
You guys have no idea how much I'm enjoying the few issues I've read. Besides the cussing (I remember after a bit they decided Tim was someone who used funny words instead of proper cusses), this feels like the Tim I know and love during the era I especially loved him.
Tim comparing himself to his predecessors? Tim not being a natural? A WRITER REMEMBERING THAT?? It's been so long since I've seen that! Most writers treat him like he was another prodigy when he wasn't. AND THIS GUY REMEMBERED THAT!
I shouldn't be so happy at just seeing Tim do Tim things, and serving his character purpose. BUT YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG IT'S BEEN SINCE A WRITER KNEW WHAT TIM WAS SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE.
Only complaints I have is that Jason feels like a typical Bat-Family member, and not the sketchy outsider that he is. Making him so close makes his character more bland in my opinion. And Steph is--also generic af unless she's wacky quirky...which is a characterization I hate for her, because she started off so damn interesting, but they made her a freaking trope instead, which is such a disservice to her, but she barely does anything so far, so whatever I guess. Doesn't mean much.
--
This is the first honest thing I've seen that I hated.
No
Not this
This isn't the Bat-Family
This is a sitcom world the fandom wants to be the Bat-Family and some comply with
They're not a sitcom. The conflicts, and uniqueness of the characters is what makes things feel alive and well.
This stuff is cheap fanservice for the fanon demographic that doesn't buy comics to begin with.
Fanon doesn't belong in canon.
--
I mean sure Tim could be drawn smaller, the gag of him looking 12 when he's nearly 18 doesn't work when he's bigger than Damian who is 15 (and contrary to some bullshit comics isn't meant to be small. that was a random thing added for writers who aren't clever to write better humor. it actually contradicts things that were already established).
Don't see the big deal though for most of this.
Can't wait to find it, though. Oh boy.
This whole obsession with Zur Batman, is way over done though. So--I wouldn't be shocked if that was the problem, because my golly does that plot point not seem to be stopping--and it was there from the start and part of the reason why I didn't read it 'til now.
Good Tim tho, at least. So heehee, yey for that--I think--I guess.
Oh, well.
It let me peak at a pseudo-version of an AU I made up years ago. So that's pretty freaking cool.
Always a plus.
And redoing Red Robin story beats but better? Normally I'd hate references to Red Robin, 'cause that changed the perception of so many characters for the worst, but ayy, a bit of redemption isn't bad.
Man, just seeing simple stuff like Tim and Bruce being good ol' classic Batman and Robin warms my heart. It's been so long since Batman and Robin has acted like a proper classic Batman and Robin. It's dynamic that's been sorely missed by many.
OH, MY GOSH, WHY DID THE FIRST STORY HAVE TO STINK SO BAD. THIS STUFF IS GREAT.
Like, DUDE, this is such a Tim thing for him to do!!
And he's showing emotion?? He's crying like how he does?? Because he's not a typical Bat-Family member who just angsts his way through?? THEY'RE MAKING HIM STAND-OUT AGAIN BY MAKING HIM, HIM??
WHY DID THE FIRST STORY HAVE TO SUCK SO BAD?? THIS IS GOOD SHIT.
Like this part is why I originally stopped reading, not because Bruce should think Tim is his soldier, and not his son, THE FREAKING OPPOSITE.
But because the original story has Bruce acting weird when unneeded, just to say this was so unneeded, and adding in all these stupid corny Bat-Family moments was so groan worthy.
This run started off with a story that was a total turn off for me.
To end up being a run that could've kept me enjoying DC, rather than running away from it from as far as I have.
Chip Zdarsky started off awful, but really, he ended up great.
And I've seen people complain about his run, and TRUST ME, there's stuff to complain about. But I have only ever seen the stuff worth complaining about, or stuff I WOULD complain about.
WHEN MOST OF THE RUN IS GOOD
At least when Tim is around.
Go figure.
Maybe I should've paid sole attention to how he wrote Tim and nothing else at the very least for that first story.
'Cause even in the first story, Tim was well-written--it's how cheap the rest of the story telling was in that first story that turned me off--and the weird knew about the movie plans that I am still fully judging harshly. (Love the new Superman film suit, though)
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I watched the newest 9-1-1 episode this morning. And I am really sad about it.
I honestly didn't see this coming. Tommy was just so different from a lot of Buck's previous love interests. And not just because he is a guy. But for lots of reasons. For one, he was a preexisting character that wasn't just introduced as Buck's love interest. When he was in a relationship with Buck, it was so healthy. He was always there when Buck needed him, and was so thoughtful. Tommy has seen Buck at his worst and didn't run away. He's so understanding, and he is also a firefighter, which means that he gets the job, which is helpful since that was a point of contention for Buck and a couple of his exes. And Buck was clearly so at ease with Tommy. Also, Tommy was already close, or became close with other members of the 118. He and Chim are already friends, and he became quick friends with Eddie, and got along with Christopher. He was just so intertwined with the main cast, it felt unnatural for that to be taken away.
It also just felt like they were setting a lot of things up to happen. I thought we were going to learn more about Tommy's dad. It also seemed like they were setting up for Tommy to become part of the main group: he expressed his jelousy about the 118 becoming a family and him not being in it, there was also that scene with the group chat and it felt like Tommy was later going to be added to it. So it sucks that that's never going to happen now. He wanted a family, and now we might never see him again. Also, what was the point of Tommy being the only one who calls Buck "Evan," it felt important, but now he's gone, so it doesn't feel like it mattered at all anymore. And Tommy mentioned how nice Buck's place is, so it felt like he was going to move in later (though, can't blame him for saying no, dude's got a car lift, and a muay thai practice area).
The whole episode, Tommy felt kind of off, compared to how he acted the episode before. Just slightly out of character at times. Like, I feel like the way he talked about Abby didn't seem entirely in character. And him getting Buck basketball tickets, even though Buck doesn't like basketball. Tommy was presented as a good listener, and Buck talks a lot, it would have come up at some point that Buck doesn't actually like basketball. And that breakup felt incredibly annoying to me. Because the reasoning was basically since Tommy is Buck's first boyfriend, he's unlikely to be his last. But it's not like Buck has never been in serious relationships before, and I understand being with a guy for the first time might be treated slightly different because it's new and exciting, but I don't think that makes the relationship any less valid. And comparing it with literally the episode before, it seemed to come so out of left field. I'd understand it if this was a plotline where Tommy was scared of getting his heart broken, but later realized that he cares too much about Buck to end things prematurely, and he shouldn't let his fear get in the way. But Lou was saying his goodbyes, so I doubt it's that.
Also, the whole breakup felt like it had this undercurrent of biphobia. But I need to rewatch the scene before I can break that down.
For what this scene means to Buck's bisexuality... not much actually. Besides the biphobic vibe I mentioned earlier, it doesn't change the fact that Buck is bi. I know a lot of people are upset about Oliver's comment. And I completely get why, since there's nothing wrong with sleeping around, but Buck's a character who's arc involved him no longer sleeping around, and now that he's bi, he might be doing that again. I totally understand why that is hurtful. For me, I don't really have a problem with his comment, just because I feel like Buck's not going to be looking for another serious relationship right now, since he just got out of one (and he wasn't the one who ended things). So I get him sleeping around. I don't think he needs to sleep around to "find himself" or whatever. I feel like I should mention that I'm not bisexual, I'm aroace, so my opinion on this isn't as important as actual bi people's. Also, I don't know what Oliver's exact comment was, I just heard second hand, so I might come back and edit this section after actually reading the exact phrasing.
Anyway, the whole thing just makes me really sad for Buck. But mainly sad for Tommy, who had grown to be such as interesting character, with a interesting backstory that we will never fully get to know. Sad for Tommy because he wanted a family, and it seemed like he was going to get one, just for it all to be taken away from him.
#bucktommy#tevan#911 abc#I'm not mad at buddie shippers for being happy#it just kind of sucks to see people celebrate something that makes you heartbroken#evan buckley#tommy kinard#I think I'm sad mainly because Tommy is my favorite character and it doesn't seem like we're going to get to see him ever again#he had so much potential#and now he's gone#but I want to say thank you to lou ferrigno jr#who played Tommy with such care and depth#lou ferrigno jr
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Two kingdoms au (mcd, human sacrifice, a little gore)
Techno is the younger prince of the kingdom of Hypixel. The kingdom has been at war with the neighboring kingdom of Hardcore for as long as Techno can remember.
Unfortunately, this means that Techno never met his father or older brother, as they were busy with the war effort.
Techno was raised by the castle staff. He still had the best education in books and swords.
When Techno is eleven, word comes that peace has been negotiated.
There’s only one problem: the kingdom of Hardcore worships the goddess of death, and any peace treaty must be sealed with the death of a member of the ruling side’s ruling family.
And Techno is expendable.
The reasoning makes sense, Techno is neither the King nor the Crown Prince. But it still hurts.
Techno is sent with a delegation to Hardcore. He wants to run, but he knows what the consequences will be for his people if he does. So he stays.
On the journey, Techno hears the delegates talking about him. Some seem sympathetic, but the others warn them not to get too close, because Techno is destined to die on Lady Death’s alter.
None of the castle staff are part of the delegation, and Techno is alone.
They arrive at the castle of the king of Hardcore. The staff is polite. The accommodations are nice. Techno has a very nice set of rooms all to himself.
The next day a knock comes on Techno’s door.
The door is opened to reveal the ruler of Hardcore himself, Philza, politely asking to come in.
Philza has come to explain the ritual that will seal the peace treaty. It will take place on the goddess’s holy day in two weeks time. The participant MUST be willing. Is Technoblade willing? He asks, is he sure? He is not being forced?
Techno is scared, but he is willing.
For some reason, Philza looks sad at the answer.
Every afternoon following the initial visit, Philza comes to see Technoblade. They talk or walk through the palace or the gardens or spar or read in the royal library.
It makes the days bearable.
Two days before the ceremony, Techno turns twelve. Philza brings a short novel as a gift and a cake to share. Techno finishes the book the next morning.
The afternoon before the ceremony, Techno asks if his father or brother will be there. They chose not to attend.
Techno looses his grip on his emotions and sobs in Philza’s arms.
Philza promises Techno that he will be with him the whole time, and that it will not hurt. Philza promises that the goddess is kind.
The promises are the only thing keeping Techno together.
The next morning Philza offers Techno tea made with a single petal from one of the goddess’s sacred flowers.
The tea tastes… cold. Philza does not drink.
The next part is usually done with the sacrifice’s closest family and friends, but Techno’s family is not here.
It is Philza who helps Techno bathe and dress, and it is Philza who gently takes Techno’s hand and walks him down the isle of the church of Lady Death to the altar, like a father about to give away his daughter to her betrothed.
Philza lays Techno down on the alter, his hand brushing Techno’s hair back and out of his face before moving to be a steadying grip on Techno’s shoulder.
Philza addresses all the people Techno does not know and Techno studies the design on the ceiling.
Techno already knows the words.
The speech comes to an end.
Phil’s hands shift to rest gently on Techno’s chest. Techno closes his eyes, silent tears escaping.
It seems that Philza’s first two promises to him held true as there was no pain when Philza’s fingers dug into Techno’s chest and pried back his ribs.
It felt odd with Philza’s hands inside his chest, gently gripping his heart like a precious thing.
Now Techno was somewhere else, cradled in the arms of the woman Philza had described to him. It was over, but even now Techno could still feel Philza’s hands holding his heart.
Everytime I tried to post this one, I had to just lay down and cry for a bit. It broke my heart (in a good way). And they way you explain the dread of the inevitable sacrifice just CRUSHES MY SOUL (in a good way)
Crying again 😢😢😢😢💚💚💚💚
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911 Lone Star Found Family
Thank you to @lemonlyman-dotcom for the tag! I am always up for talking about how much I love the relationships in this show
1)What is your favorite 911 Lone Star Found Family Moment?
It is so incredibly difficult for me to choose just one moment but if I had to, it would be TK trying to saving Marjan in 1x03. I'm choosing this one because even though we don't see as much of TK and Marjan's friendship as I wish we did, the idea of them is very close to my heart. I got introduced the show way back when it was first released by my bestie who is so much like TK that it's a running joke that TK was created especially for him. While I am not exactly like Marjan, I am a badass Muslim woman so I am the Marjan to my bestie's TK. And that moment I picked that moment in 1x03 because at that point, TK and Marjan didn't even really know each other that well yet TK was willing to risk his life to save her.
2)Which platonic pairing/friendship dynamic are you most looking forward too seeing again in season?
See answer above. TK and Marjan's friendship is really important to me. Aside from what I mentioned above, I love to think about how Marjan went from being treated as a prop at her former place to show everyone how woke they were to being respected and cherished as an important part of the team and a family member. As a side note, this is why as a Muslim woman myself, I like how Owen bringing Marjan (and everyone else on the team) isn't treated as something that he's doing to save them but rather is him almost inadvertently bringing together a family. He doesn't treat any of them as damsels who need him to save them whether they ask for it or not, he treats them like family that you help no matter what because you love them. And Marjan obviously picked up on it despite her initial reservations precisely because she wasn't looking for a savior and that's why she was so adamant to bring the firehouse back in season. All that said, I think TK and Marjan have a lot in common with the way they have been treated in the past regarding their job. Marjan was treated as a prop to get woke points and was constantly being underestimated and held back. TK was used to feeling like he had to constantly prove himself not only because he felt people looked down on him for being the captain's son but also because he, like so many others with any kind of mental illness, felt like he needed to prove people wrong constantly as validation that he is worth something. But then they found each other and I have loved that little moment during Marjan's interview in the pilot where TK looks up at her and smiles. You can tell he feels he has found a kindred spirit.
3)If you could pick one Lone Star character to be friends with, who would you choose?
Well since I already have a TK in my life, I'm just going to go with that. My TK (though that's not his name lol) is so important to me and my life would not be the same without him. It certainly would not be as good.
4)Which would you rather attend: Catan night at the loft or game night at the Ryders?
Now this is a tough choice because I have never played Catan but I love charades. However, I am going with Catan night purely because I love seeing them all in their group and I would love to spent time in that loft.
5)A character of your choice ends up in jail. Who would they call to bail them out (assuming their romantic partner, parent, and/or child didn't pick up)?
Carlos tbh because we've seen that he has no problem bailing his friends (or indeed his soulmate who had just rejected him) out of jail. Also, I just want to sit in a car with him while he's in uniform.
Anyway, all of this is meant to say that I adore TK and Marjan together because to me it feels like watching my bestie and myself onscreen. I would not have even known about the show without him and even though he is not really participating in fandom anymore for his own reasons, it is still a ritual for us to watch the show together and talk about it.
I know that I was late in responding to this but work has been a bitch lately (why oh why does real life have to be a thing?!) and I have no idea who has already participated or wants to participate. I am also really shy about tagging people so I will make this an open tag and I hope anyone who wants to participate will feel welcome to do so. And if there is anyone who doesn't mind being tagged by me, please let me know!
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the masked warrior — chapter 1
pairing — childe x f!reader
summary — Having to live by draining other people’s blood to pay your debt was already a burden to your heart, but you let your mask fall in front of the ones that were hungry to know your identity and take advantage of it. Even worse, it was one of the most distinguished Fatui Harbingers, the Snezhnayan organization you owed and killed to pay the debt. With him appearing on your balcony to offer a big deal, your world shifted radically.
tags — there are very brief mentions of blood in the first paragraph!!
notes — this is the only work i have in my ao3 account, i decided to rewrite it here first and then I'll probably go back and edit the original; maybe the original one sounds better? i guess it's very subjective, you can take a look for yourself if you want!
there are already 12 chapters released on ao3 in case you want to read more!! ALSO!! thank you so much to everyone liking "lament"!!! you made my day!!!
words — 3k
MASTERLIST || REQUESTS || NEXT CHAPTER
Chapter 1 — Dangers of the Scenery
After several minutes of shock and desperation from your enemies, the battle finally came to a close as you rest your weapon on the ground and catch your breath. You take in the destruction that surrounds you - the once vibrant landscape is now tainted by burn marks, damaged trees, and the blood of both you and your foes staining the rocks. Despite the guilt and horror of the situation, you know that it had to be done. You needed to pay off another portion of your debt so that you can finally be free of this burden. You would breathe without suffering from this problem ever again, right?
In an effort to rid the area of the fearsome atmosphere, you pluck the delicate lily from your head and plant it in the center of the field, letting its fragrance fill the air. As you gaze out at the untouched view before you, the beauty of the mountains and waterfalls brings you back to simpler, happier times. You can see Liyue Harbor in the distance, but they cannot see you - the distance is too great. The warm sunshine on your cheeks and the gentle breeze through your hair and clothes bring you a sense of peace, reminding you of the joys of everyday life. You long for those carefree days to return, but everything fell apart after your father's death. He had gone on a mission with the Millelith but was killed when his fellow members used him as a sacrifice to escape their enemies. You never imagined his job would be dangerous enough to end his life, especially when he had others to help him.
No one would tell you the truth about what had happened, but rumors spread like wildfire since someone couldn’t keep their mouth shut. Your dream had been to follow in your father's footsteps and join the Millelith, training with him every day, but those dreams were shattered. Around the same time, your mother became ill, and the money you had saved was not enough to cover the medical expenses. Desperate to save the last member of your family, you made a deal with the Fatui and the Northland Bank. Despite the doctors' efforts, your mother's condition worsened, and she eventually passed away, leaving you alone.
Tears flow from the memories and emotions flooding back to you. The only thing worse than your own death, which you fear will come at the hands of the Fatui if you do not collect enough mora in time.
How could you ever let this happen?
Suddenly, a rustling noise comes from behind you, someone or something moving in the bushes and hiding behind a golden tree. You realize you let your guard down and forgot to check your surroundings. Quickly donning your mask to conceal your face, you call out, "Who's there? Face me if you are brave enough, or run and have your life at my sake." Your voice echoes through the falls, and the world falls silent, waiting for you to take action. When no one comes forward, you decide to investigate for yourself, but found nothing. Your heart races as you fear that something terrible is about to happen. Have your actions caught up with you? Had your life come to an end as the Masked Warrior?
Your visit was over. It would be better to leave and return to Liyue Harbor, to your home, and get some rest.
In the peaceful and prosperous port city of Liyue Harbor, life is usually calm and comfortable. However, the money-hungry Fatui have been known to abuse their authority, causing problems for merchants and ruining their businesses. The Fatui have gained prosperity through their well-known Northland Bank, offering tricky contracts to the citizens. This is the darker side of the idyllic paradise.
Recently, rumors have circulated about a masked warrior who helps merchants by keeping the Fatui at bay, often through violent means. Some believe this warrior is a woman, while others think it is a man. Some people doubt the existence of this warrior, saying that the stories are just a way for people to keep their hope alive as they struggle with debt. These stories have even caught the attention of the Fatui and the Millelith. While the Fatui are not particularly concerned, the Millelith is trying to catch the warrior, believing them to be committing crimes and damaging the reputation of Liyue Harbor.
Most citizens are relieved by the presence of the Masked Warrior, but some, siding with the Millelith, want the warrior to disappear before the Fatui take more drastic action and make their lives even more difficult.
At the Northland Bank, the stories of the Masked Warrior are a source of entertainment for the workers. At the end of the day, they can be heard giggling about the absurdity of someone trying to mess with the Fatui and help traders. It was not possible to maintain a dull face with something so foolish. They believe that the exhausted salesmen must be crazy to tell such silly stories, and they are sure they could handle the so-called warrior if they were to find them. They see the tales as nothing more than a way for debtors to try and instill fear in the loyal servants of the Tsaritsa.
That was until, one peaceful day, a Fatuus arrives at the Northland Bank with a troubled and startled expression on his face. His damaged clothes show that he has been in a fight, and a serious one. Ekaterina, the receptionist, stops what she is doing to pay attention to the man, and Nadia, the guard, storms inside to see what has happened. The Eleventh Fatui Harbinger, who was previously requesting a report from the receptionist, is also present. He stood up from the countertop, ready to inquire about the Fatuus' situation, but the agent spoke faster. The words coming out of his mouth couldn't be more than what the rumors had already told - yet he swore they were real, saying that the Masked Warrior, whom he saw with his own eyes, is real, and she was someone who had the strength of the sheer cold of Snezhnaya. He describes the woman in detail. He introduced the glaze lilies to the picture, which weren't common in many parts of Liyue. In the Harbor, there were some, but not many. The second place they considered would be the Qingce Village.
Childe, the Eleventh Fatui Harbinger, is skeptical of the Fatuus' story and decides to see for himself. Still, if that warrior truly existed, then all the agents' disappearances and unusual lack of mora received would make more sense He dismisses the workers, warning them not to spread the rumors any further, and decides to investigate the matter further the following day. He is confident that he can easily lure the Masked Warrior into his grasp.
When he nearly missed a woman with what looked like a heavy bag entering a house by his side that looked a lot like the descriptions of the attacked Fatui Agent during his walk on the wonderfully light streets, he almost tripped on the pavement. After stopping, the unique perfume of glaze lilies didn't go unnoticed by him, he saw the balcony in the second-floor apartment. It contained many local flowers, including the lilies. Could it be that he had found her so soon? No, it couldn't have been so easy. Besides, it could have been anyone. Setting up the trap the subsequent day would help him decipher the code that tangled his mind for the past minutes. It wouldn't be fun at all if he didn't at least have a try at fighting this allegedly mighty warrior.
As another day dawns, you feel the weight of your responsibilities to continue collecting blood. You leave your home later than usual to buy breakfast at the Wanmin Restaurant, but you cannot shake the feeling that someone is watching you. You worry that your actions from the previous day have attracted attention, but no one had said anything until now. If people knew your true identity, you would not have been so quick to leave your apartment.
As you wait to place your order at the restaurant, you are greeted by Xiangling, the talented daughter of Chef Mao. You had been coming to the restaurant regularly since you were a child and have always enjoyed chatting with Xiangling when you can. She is dedicated to her work with her father and the two have a close relationship that warms your heart. After a brief catch-up, you place your order and Xiangling gives a chili pepper to her pet panda, Guoba, to light the fire for her.
Your order is ready quickly, and Xiangling brings it to your table, sitting down to keep you company. Guoba climbs onto your lap, requesting soft pats on his head. You thank Xiangling and begin to eat, listening as she talks excitedly about a new recipe she is working on and how she hopes you will try it. "And it's going to be super spicy! Even spicier than the last time, it's going to be perfect!" she says with enthusiasm. You both laugh at the thought of how spicy the dish will be, and you reflect on how Xiangling is one of the few, if not the only, people you can call a friend. She may not give you gifts or hang out with you all the time, but the moments you share are special to you.
Your conversation with Xiangling is interrupted by the arrival of Chef Mao, who is calling for his daughter. Xiangling apologizes and quickly leaves to attend to the customers who have lined up at the restaurant, leaving you to finish your meal. As you are about to leave, you drop some mora on the ground and bend down to pick it up. As you do, you overhear a conversation between two young children nearby, arguing about the rumors of the Masked Warrior and whether or not they are real. The kids seemed to be young, in the years of being naive and not having to worry about a thing. They were disputing the rumors of the Masked Warrior. You recalled you had seen them a few times already with their parents at the Wanmin Restaurant.
One of the children turned to the other with a satisfied look on their face. "You see, I told you it wasn't real. You owe me a thousand mora for that, you promised." The child extended their hand to the other, ready to take the promised mora into their own hands. "Oh, you wish! The Fatui got out of my father's route yesterday in the mountains, and there was blood everywhere! They just came back like they always do. The warrior is real, you'll see! I'll bet all my mora on it!"
"Yeah, right. Then I'll bet all my mora it isn't real!"
Could it be that it was the corresponding place where you had fought recently? Why would the Fatui come back so soon?
"It must have been a very delayed debt..." you assumed, hastening your pace back to your residence to get your wooden mask and your weaponry. You'd ordinarily go out and do your tasks at night when it was easier to hide in the shadows, but money was tight, and you wanted to get your life together sooner or later. Usually, you would talk to the person before deciding if you'll take the offer or not, but finding the man in the light of day would not be of many advantages to you. You would collect the remuneration at night when it was secure.
As the sun began to set, you made your way up the mountain path, fueled by the memory of yesterday's encounter. The climb took longer than you remembered, but finally, you reached the spot where you had fought the Fatui the day before. The sky was awash with the colors of twilight as you surveyed the scene, still feeling as though you were being watched. Despite your desire to avoid violence, it was the only way you knew how to get things done, and before you knew it, blood was spilled on the ground, on your clothes and mask, and in the once-clear stream that flowed through the cliffs.
You noted that your enemies did not resemble great beings today. They appeared relatively weak. Without allowing any more seconds of your valuable time to go to waste, you dived into battle and stood your ground. Today you would try to scare them and not harm them. But your plan didn't go as you had predicted. The Harbingers jumped on you, and it didn't feel gratifying to go around and spill blood wherever, but it was the only way you knew how to get things done. Blood spilled everywhere: your mask and clothes, the grass, the rocks, the plants, and the once crystalline water that flowed to the ends of the cliff.
It was over before you knew it, and the wooden mask felt heavier than ever. It felt worse than all the emotional wounds already engraved on your mind and body. You needed to take it out and breathe again, but the feeling of being observed still hadn't left you, and it was haunting you ever since you had left this place. You were ready to take your leave when you heard something falling behind you. Could it be that it was the person that had seen you yesterday? It was disturbing your peace of mind and giving you a more difficult time than the one you had already given yourself.
Panic had caused you to turn around and stand your ground again, facing the enemy. You weren't ready to fight. Did you let someone escape again? Or were they here before you? You couldn't make up your mind. There were several possibilities, too many.
In the dim light, all you could make out was the silhouette of a man approaching you. With wavy ginger hair and a bright smile, he strode confidently towards you, his grey attire standing out against the moonlight. "So it was you, the one delaying my work, correct? You've caused quite the stir," he exclaimed. He dashed in your direction with weapons in hand - he clearly had a vision -, but you jumped back, not noticing what would be the cliff that was right behind you. The thing you had found so appealing about this place, something that calmed you and assured you of all the beautiful things nature would preserve, was now deadly and inevitable. You could feel your body working so hard to recover solid ground, only to fall. Death's arms were open to you, and you would have to embrace it.
Considering you had your eyes locked on the dangers of the scenery, you didn't notice the arm that grabbed yours and prevented your fall. But it was not dragging you back to safety. It was just letting you swing, teasing your death. That boy caught your attention rather quickly after saving you from the worst ending of your life. He smiled, but was it because he had rescued you or because he was planning on letting you go and wanted to see your last moments of desperation?
"Now, listen here, 'Masked Warrior'..." Oh, what fame had brought against you. You were clinging to his arm with such strength you believed you could take it off. It was your last chance at living again, but would your fall change anything now? If he were to expose you, it would be over, wouldn't it? The Millelith would lock you up in no time. "...I was at least expecting a fight. I am almost impressed by what you can do. But I came up with a better plan than this." He reached out his hand to claim your mask, forgetting you wouldn't give him that pleasure. You let go of his arm, and the feeling of wind surrounding you came again. However, his arm had got a better hold of yours. With a simple movement, he used your arm to swing you over the cliff and back to safety. It made you collide back with the beloved ground you missed so much. But this reunion was not as expected. Your back was the first to hit the soft grass that didn't do anything when you got to the rocks, then your head, and then nothing. You couldn't keep your eyes open any longer, and the pain itself made you painless by shutting you down completely. It was like a very unexpected profound sleep.
The pain was indescribable. Every movement was a struggle, and even breathing was difficult, as if something were blocking your airways. Your head was spinning, and you couldn't tell how long you had been unconscious. It was still dark outside, but the cold wind had subsided. You were lying on a soft surface - your bed - and noticed your window was open, letting in the breeze that rustled the curtains. Your balcony, filled with blooming flowers, was visible through the window, and you saw a familiar shadow leaning against the wall. As the figure stepped forward, the moon's light illuminated their face, and you felt a sense of fear and insecurity wash over you. The person's fearless smile did nothing to ease your worry.
"Hey girlie, are you ready to listen to me now?"
MASTERLIST || REQUESTS || NEXT CHAPTER
thank you for reading!! if you want to read more, there are already 12 chapters released on ao3!!
#childe#childe x reader#tartaglia#ajax#genshin x female reader#genshin x reader#childe x fem!reader#tartagalia x reader#genshin tartaglia#ajax x reader#genshin ajax#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact childe#genshin impact tartaglia#genshin impact x you#genshin impact x y/n#fatui harbingers#genshin angst#genshin impact angst#genshin imagines#genshin headcanons#genshin x you#romance#drama#genshin romance#slow burn#slow romance#reader insert#self insert#AU
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HSR: Character Build Archive - Destruction
Nanook
The Aeon that presides over the Path of Destruction. THEY were born from Adlivun as the world fell. THEY often appear as a human male with dark skin and golden eyes.
Certain character descriptions may contain story spoilers: Dan Heng - Imbibtor Lunae, Firefly, Misha. If you’re not caught up to the most current version of the game, please read them at your own discretion.
Arlan
The head of Herta Space Station's Security Department. This inarticulate boy is willing to protect the researchers in pursuit of their work with his life.
unleveled: lvl 1, e6
Blade
A member of the Stellaron Hunters, and a swordsman who abandoned his body to become a blade. He pledges loyalty to Destiny's Slave, and possesses a terrifying self-healing ability.
unowned: lost 50/50 during his release banner and then skipped him during 1.6 rerun because I was saving for e2 dhil. very tempted pull him during a future rerun just to complete my collection of the playable high-cloud quintet members. probably won't do that though, I'd be better off pulling a wind dps on a different path
Clara
A vagrant girl who lives with robots. She is introverted, gentle, and has a pure heart. She wishes for all Underworlders to become a family.
unleveled: lvl 1, e1
Dan Heng - Imbibitor Lunae
Dan Heng's true form from his Vidyadhara lineage carries the residual power left behind by his past incarnation, the Imbibitor Lunae. Upon accepting the majestic horned crown atop his forehead, he must accept all the merits and faults attributed to that sinner.
daniel and I have had a very tumultuous building experience; prior to my latest upgrade, I was still using a rutilant imaginary sphere that had a 15% hp substat on it
this build is more than fine, and I really don't need to mess with it unless I'm going to pull his signature light cone; I want sig, but I have no idea how long I'll be waiting for another rerun since we just had one during 2.0
pulling sparkle for him is my absolute top priority; min-maxing dhil probably won't continue until at least midway through version 2.5
latest upgrade - 7.19.24
Firefly
A self-proclaimed greenhorn performer of the Iris Family, but actually a member of the Stellaron Hunters. To ensure that "the Express chases after the 'grand legacy' alongside them," she risked her life and finally "returns from the dead."
unowned: skipped to fish for Gallagher copies on Ruan Mei's 2.3 rerun banner. not interested in pulling as my dedicated fire dps
Hook
Boss (self-proclaimed) of an Underworld adventure squad, The Moles. She loves freedom and sees life as a series of adventures.
unleveled: lvl 1, e6
Jingliu
Former Sword Champion of the Luofu, and the reason behind the Cloud Knights' mythical reputation of implacable might. Now, her name has been wiped from the records, and she is a traitor of the Xianzhou walking on the fine line between sanity and mara-struck.
so, as it turns out, I hate hypercarry jingliu: I have gone back to the +1/-1 spd setup; it would've been far less of a hassle to continue running this in the first place (i.e. if it ain't broke, don't fix it)
switched head/hand pcs to ones w/spd & swapped to spd boots (which I forgot I owned); she's currently 3.7 spd faster than she needs to be, although the gap shouldn't really cause any tuning issues with bronya(?)
relevant stat changes: +41.1 spd, -2.6% crate, -27.9% cdmg, -570 atk
score change: +9 (S+)
every time that I mess with this woman, she loses crate and it's very unfortunate because her crate is already abysmal as it is. also lost a large chunk of atk & cdmg but the cost was necessary for my rotation so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
need to farm hunter (cdmg body + spd boots) & rutilant (ice dmg sphere), preferably w/double crit or crate + atk
very, very close to groveling down on my knees for crate subs bc I don’t know what else to do; all of jingliu's problems have revolved around her crit ratio the entire time that I’ve had her. I need something to change, preferably soon, lest I min-max away my sanity
latest upgrade - 8.4.24 | changelog
Misha
The naive and ignorant protagonist of Mikhail's childhood dreams. He ran away from the dream bubble. As he bears the mission of guiding the Astral Express to discover the Watchmaker's legacy, he mistakenly believes himself to be Penacony's "bellboy".
unleveled: lvl 1, e3
Physical Trailblazer
A [person] who boarded the Astral Express. They chose to travel with the Astral Express to eliminate the dangers posed by the Stellaron.
unbuilt: removed & recycled outdated relics. not likely to rebuild
Xueyi
Judge of the Ten-Lords Commission, which controls life and death on the Luofu. She inhabits a puppet body to return to the world and carry out her missions.
unleveled: lvl 1, e6
Yunli
A Zhuming swordmaster visiting the Xianzhou Luofu. General Huaiyan's beloved adopted granddaughter. She offers no pretenses for warriors who are lacking in virtue and love to claim the weapons of her defeated foes.
unowned: won't be pulling her because her kit is too reminiscent of clara's (who I currently have no interest in leveling up). not sure what it is about counter-attackers but they've yet to grab my interest enough to want to play one of them. might've been more willing to consider her if she had been a different element
The most recent version of a character's build(s) will be listed here; older build versions can be found on their designated changelog. To avoid word/image limit issues, information on a retired build will be removed from the path archive and a link to the build's changelog will be provided in its place.
Changelogs will only be created and maintained for the characters that I actively use; they will be updated whenever significant relic upgrades/changes have been made. Characters that have multiple builds (i.e. additional builds that are non-traditional, niche, or memes) will have a dedicated changelog for each one.
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#honkai star rail#hsr#hsr character build archive#hsr destruction#hsr nanook#hsr arlan#hsr blade#hsr clara#hsr firefly#hsr hook#hsr imbibitor lunae#hsr jingliu#hsr misha#hsr physical trailblazer#hsr xueyi#hsr yunli#tjs hsr shenanigans#tjemegames
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It is so refreshing to read a story (even a fanfic!) like Flowers, Sounds & Stones. Honestly, and I mean this in the best way possible, I was surprised to find out you were a man because of how well written the women are in this fic. I think anons have said it before but I’m repeating it after the two most recent chapters about Ume and Mitsuri
I don’t think I have words for the emotions those chapters left me with. Ume’s story made me sad because we already saw how it ended, but Mitsuri’s made me sad because quite literally NOTHING that happened to her was her fault even REMOTELY. And the duality between Ume and Ubuyashiki? That Ume acknowledged where she did wrong and showed remorse while Ubuyashiki literally tells people to get over it and think of him as a natural disaster?? FUCK dude that’s why you keep losing to her and her legacy!! And why all these other women keep beating your ass!! Nezuko, Makomo, Shinobu, and Mitsuri won’t be victims. Shizu, Rei Kibutsuji, and Koinatsu won’t be martyrs. Ume, and Tsutako, and Mrs. Agatsuma won’t Rest In Peace. And the women Ubuyashiki directly controlled and manipulated? His wife and daughter? His wife wasn’t strong enough to break free and it never once felt like it was her fault. Susamaru went out cussing and homosexual. She won’t be a martyr either
And I know it’s not a lot but it’s so nice to see women that are just people. Messy, broken, ugly people. Nezuko has a boob staring problem and cusses like a sailor! Nezuko Kamado! And she has a crush on Makomo, who regularly makes Kakushi members like Murata take on demons as a way to force them to train! And let’s not get started on whatever the fuck Shinobu’s got going on with Kaigaku! (This paragraph is completely illegible to people who don’t know anything about this fic, I know)
But like, they’re all still clearly women though. Other anons talk about Nezuko admiring her reflection and beating people up who call her ugly, and I think about Shizu Shinazugawa’s mental spiral being much more heavily criticized by the Demon Slayer Corps than Michikatsu’s. I think about how Mitsuri wears her revealing uniform but covers her mouth so that she can have autonomy over who looks at specific parts of her body that have been violated. I think about 13 year old Kiriena Kibutsuji being forced to find a husband before her birthday or die horribly because the family curse said that’s just what happens to the daughters. How Ume had to have an excuse for traveling with her friend the samurai, that they were related or that she literally had to marry him to continue traveling with him. How Obanai - who isn’t a woman but used to live as one - was beaten down into the mud on his wedding day in his wedding dress after he was left at the altar because the word of his future father in law trumped his own. How Kotoha Hashibira had her face disfigured and torn apart by someone she considered closed family because she did not return his obsessive and creepy advances AFTER she had already had to run away from her abusive husband and raise her baby on her own. How the first thing Shinobu ever says to Nezuko when she literally has a poisoned sword pointed at Tanjiro’s heart was to never plead for mercy because that’s how women get killed.
It’s the little things that I’m obsessed with here and I can’t believe this is just a fanfic of a manga that is basically “what if we shifted every character slightly to the left” so I need you to understand that I call BULLSHIT on your claim that most of the character swaps were at random!! I’m so sorry for the rant but I’m experiencing EMOTIONS.
Anon my love I am also experiencing the emotions 😭
It’s 2 in the morning so I’m half awake atm, but thank you so much for your kind words. I’m really happy my silly little fanfiction has touched so many people in so many ways and I’m happy my storytelling is up to snuff. And I really mean it when I say these swaps were random! I based the character swaps on general vibes, not stories, so it’s by pure coincidence and a lot of outlining that the story I wanted to tell about grief and womanhood is coming together like it is. FS&S didn’t originally start out as a narrative about the struggles of womanhood, I just wanted to write about demon slayer characters but Different, but the way that the character list fell had women in the majority of the main roles and I just rolled with it to the best of my abilities. Some of the writing is based off of my own experiences as a trans man (mostly Obanai’s life, but I draw inspiration/reference in other places) but the majority is me just writing out the canon events but with women in the main roles and that’s how we got here. I added some nuance here and there, and adapted the plot to incorporate as much real-world opinions/experiences the characters would have at the time (the time being early 20th century Japan), but other than that Gotouge did all the hard work for me
I’m really happy that my late nights and overwhelmed Microsoft word account managed to string together a narrative coherent enough to earn such praise. Mentally I’m giving you a sloppy kiss on the lips, thank you. I hope you, your family, your friends, and everyone you know have a happy holiday week and have a happy new year
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I don’t know how to ask you this bestie 😩… But if you write incest do you mind doing one where all might’s daughter has a crush on Endeavor? And they both smash her… Feel free to make it stepcest if that’s more comfortable 🥲
DON’T BESTIE ME YOU FREAK!!!!-
Anyways, congrats on being my FIRST controversial ask. That being said, it took me a while to figure out whether or not I would write this one 🤔. Of course, this will be one of the ones I won’t be able to post on Wattpad lmao, but I’ll give it a go!
If you didn’t already read the request, I will give you the necessary warnings again.
tw: incest….. never thought this day would come, dp
Author's annual moral PSA: I would hope I wouldn't have to tell yall I don't condone this irl. This is both illegal in many states, and in all ways an abuse of power and trust. Not to mention no one should look at their family members in this way and if it has happened to you don't be ashamed of it as it is not your fault but seek help because it is dangerous in the long run. This is for pure fantasy purposes
You are not underage in this fic. I never do underaged work.
There is way too much plot in this
Your cheeks were stretched wide enough to rival your fathers’ as you ran home. Your feet bounce and your pull at your braids nervously as you look out the window of the train, the excitement you felt made you restless to get home. Your neighbors watched you as you ran by, dents caused by your shoes hitting the pavement as your quirk flowed through your pumping blood. “Dad!”
You slam your front door open and scramble through the labyrinth of your rich home. Tossing open your father’s office door unaware of how your outburst startles All Might. “Y-Yes what is it?” Papers flutter all around as you carelessly glide through Toshinori’s neatly stacked papers. You slam the slightly crumpled papers onto his desk, ignoring how the sheer strength of your hand nearly causes his cold cup of coffee to fall. “Remember how 3rd years get the chance to have the first pick in finding the company they’ll sidekick for?!”
All Might watches you with fondness in his eyes as he cleans his glasses off. He was now far in his years, a healthy 82. His hair was now less of a golden yellow and more of beige as it silvered slowly. He was still his normal towering height, retained much of his muscles, and could periodically assume his big form now that he finally had the time to rest and heal properly. “You mean the program that you talked about every day because it was free.”
You roll your eyes, “Free for me, not for you. Anyways look, look, look!” You hold the paper in his face and he takes it from you, “I see you were accepted into your first choice at-” You snatch the paper from him and hop around excitedly, “-At Endevā Jimusho And that’s not even the best part!” All Might's contempt face drops, “All sidekicks get to stay in a guest house in close quarters with Endeavor himself!!"
Joy no longer existed in Toshinori's emotional library. "Absolutely not." Your face falls and your rant halts completely. "What?" Yagi puts his glasses on and shuffles through his papers stiffly, "I do not agree on Endeavors training methods." You raise an eyebrow, "Is this coming from the man that punched Pro-Hero Dynamite and Deku into buildings during an emergency villain drill? In front of everyone?"
Yagi hides his face behind a stapled packet, "I was giving them a taste of reality, a villain does not care for a hero's well-being." You sit down on his desk, legs crossed before curling your finger over his paper, your eyes miss how AllMight briefly glances down, “Yes, but isn’t it a job as a hero to protect people, even the students they train?” Yagi craned his neck until it makes a satisfying crack, a smirk adorning his lips. “I suppose you are right.”
He thinks for a moment before silently shuffling his papers before returning his gaze to your hopeful face, “Why should I assist you with your obvious little crush on my coworker?” You clearly stiffen “Well if it will make you happy-” You don’t allow him to finish before your arms around his shoulders squeezing his neck with most of your strength.
AllMight watches you leave his room slightly disheartened, reaching into his desk drawer he pulls out his phone and dials. “What do you want?” AllMight leans back in his chair pulling at his pants to loosen the tension in his groin, “A proposition.”
The next day Yagi is driving you to your new home for the next 6 months. Your eyes glaze over with futuristic thoughts on how your stay would be. “Everything is so shiny!” Yagi shrugs as he pulls into the parking lot. Enji was always minimalistic when it came to modern designs.” Your head snaps to Toshinori’s side of the car, “His name is Enji!?” Your question is laughed off as Toshinori shuts the car off.
Although your amazement is captured solely by the prospect of working with a pro-hero, the fact that your father is a pro-hero does not go unnoticed by the people around you. “Is that AllMight!” “Should I ask for his picture?!” Even with Yagi’s shadow enveloping your body your attention hones in on the automatic glass doors in front of you.
Inside there is a crowd of students experiencing orientation and getting assigned their respective dorm and possible roommate. You take your first steps in their direction before your arm is pulled and Yagi dawns a playful grin as he presses his finger to his lips. You follow him, eyebrows furrowed “You aren’t trying to change my mind are you?” You don’t get an answer as you are dragged along.
Stairs after stair you follow your father until you come to the very top, legs throbbing but interest peaked. Yagi opens two double doors as easily as breathing and your eyes go wide as the broad shoulders of a familiar hero come into view. “You’re finally here, took you long enough.” Your heart beats in your chest, auburn hair, broad shoulders, and a stoic face that you’d only seen on television, now present in front of you. Yagi shuts the door causing you to jump, “Oh um hi!” A large hand touches your shoulder making you jump” Calm down Y/n!” A cheerful exclamation rings out from above you as Yagi transforms into his larger form.
Heavy footsteps make the room shake wherever the two men walk around the room, “I heard you wanted to meet with me.” Your demeanor goes from uneasy to panicked giggling, “O-Oh really, who told you that!’ AllMight chuckles before patting your head, why don’t you ask him all the silly questions you want, I have to use the restroom.
Endeavor leans against his desk, arms crossed allowing his muscles to bulge through his white button-up shirt. “Yagi tells me a lot of good things about you.” Endeavor stands straighter, a ballpoint pen in hand before he gestures for you to take a seat. You settle in the seat glancing towards the door before looking up at Endeavor who settles on his desk. “What’s the matter, you seem nervous?” The deepness of his tone sends a shiver down your spine. Shifting your legs closer together you clear your throat, “I’m just not used to meeting my childhood hero in person.” Endeavor laughs in a way that sounds more like a bellow, “When you say it like that I feel old!”
Your face hadn’t stopped burning since you entered the room but the joke forced a chuckle through your lips allowing you to relax just a little bit. Calculating eyes narrow, making you feel even smaller than you already did in the hero’s presence. “Now, come on. I’m sure you have something you’d always wanted to do if you met your hero.” Endeavor’s happy-go-lucky attitude catches you off guard as it juxtaposes the hardened persona he had cultivated over the years. “Well, I suppose a picture would be a start if you don’t mind?”
Seconds later you somehow find yourself in Endeavor's lap as he holds the camera up for a picture. His body is unpainted hot but you assume that was simply just a side effect of his quirk. “Um, are you sure you’re okay with this?” Endeavor hums in acceptance. A heavy arm loops around your waist pulling you closer, close enough to become aware of a problem pressed gently against your ass. “Oh!” Endeavor’s fingers slipped pressing the capture button, “What’s wrong did I do it wrong?” You shake your head becoming embarrassed for the both of you, “Nothing!” Enji’s voice lowers into a mumble that reverberated against the back of your neck, “Good.”
Enji straightens his arm once more to retake the picture and you awkwardly smile into the camera, grin becoming strained when he had yet to snap the photo. You shuffle the slightest bit to get a more comfortable position and a guttural groan is released from Enji’s lips. "Are you alright, Endeavor?" Your question is ignored and your phone is put down on the table. Large hands contrasting unbridled power is your stomach delicately as though you were made of porcelain. "Are you sure there is nothing else you'd like to do with your hero?"
Endeavors face nudges away your braids allowing him to press his heated mouth against your skin. "Nothing that would help you get to know them better?" You don't get to respond, your body is hoisted around to face Endeavor. Why nervousness clearly painting itself on your features before being overcome with confused pleasure as Endeavor pressed his lips against your own.
You moan against his lips, hips grinding against each other, the thought of where you are slipped past your mind and to your pussy. Endeavors hands down your body, pinching and pulling before sighing with his calloused fingernails. You couldn't believe this was happening, you feel your pants being pulled off. Just yesterday you believed that you would only be able to meet your hero in passing. Your bra is on the floor and your pussy weeps against his slacks.
The motions are fast-paced and you feel his thumb pressing against your clit. “Yes!” Endeavor kisses your lips, his stubble scratching your cheeks slightly as his tongue explores your mouth. Confidence floods your body as you hop off of Endeavor's lap and quickly undo the buttons of his slacks, he watches you out of breath in the best way.
Thick in your hands, the veins twitch to the tune of his blood. The clear stickiness of pre-cum coats the underside and you use it to stroke his length. "Please fuck me Endeavor!" You look up at him, face contorted with desperate thoughts as you angle your body towards his cock, the tip of it rubbing against your folds. You were wet, so wet making the fuchsia tip of his cock feel more engorged.
"Don't regret this. "You’re pulled back into his lap with ease, pussy trembling from the display of strength. With Endeavor holding your weight and your hand positioning his length below you, the slide down was easy as it could be. Your legs wrap around his waist as you adjust to him. “We have to be quick.” Endeavor rolls your hips when your breathing becomes even again, “We have all the time in the world.” You smirk trailing your finger up Enji’s chest, “What, you have a thing for getting caught?”
Your cheeks are spread apart by Endeavor’s fingers as he hooks one into the small slit left remaining in your pussy. “Something like that.” From behind you the sound of the door shutting makes your neck quickly craned around to look back. Standing with his arms behind his back and an unreadable expression stood Yagi, “Am I missing the party?” Ashamed excuses leave your mouth, tearful and panicked you squeal when Endeavor raises your hips before sliding you down his cock. “No, you are just in time.”
Yagi slowly removes the suit he wore, shrugging off his suit jacket as the sound of your muffled whimpers filter through his ears. You hide your face, curling into Endeavor’s form but a hand stops you, gripping your face, “Don’t be shy, it was his idea after all.” AllMight chuckled, “Yeah, it took a lot of convincing on my part.”Long fingers wrapped around the base of your skull where your braids connect before yanking your head back.
Toshinori looked down at you, face stoic and mockingly disappointed, "I thought it would take a lot more convincing but look at you. " Yagi dragged the back of his hand around your jaw and down your chest ripping the fabric with ease. Your tits bounced on every thrust that Endeavor continued to make, wordless moans and drool leaving your moan as your pussy clenched around the cock inside you.
"Such a little whore for him aren't you?" You shake your head in protest before your eyes widen as chapped but soft lips are placed over yours. He was kissing you, your brain short circuits as his tongue forces its way past your lips. It's wrong, you know that. Hell, this whole situation is wrong. You should be downstairs with the others doing orientation, not upstairs riding the cock of a pro-hero and french kissing the other. You knew it was wrong, but why did it feel so good?
Endeavor groans at how sloppy you were becoming. The sound of your pussy squelching as cream gathered around Endeavor's cock before being pushed back inside of you. "So both of you are twisted in the head." A large thumb presses down on your clit making your pussy spasm as you cum from the heightened stimulation. Endeavor keeps thrusting, his libido unmatched and energy pent up.
Yagi reaches in between the two of you pressing his palm against your pussy as his fingertips graze Enji’s dick on every upstroke. “Are you getting wetter sweetheart? He feels so good doesn't he?" Your mouth is agape and your weak hands Endeavor's shoulder is the only thing keeping you upright when your eyes roll back. "Y-Yes daddy!" Yagi wheezes before he's fiddling with his suit pants and pulling you back by your hair.
It was a strange display of balance on your end. Endeavor’s arms hold your legs tightly in order to keep you on his lap and on his cock meanwhile you are as your father slaps his hardened cock against your cheek, splashing his precum onto your chin. "I got you this far dear, why don't you return the favor?"
Whether it was diluted senses or your subconscious coming forward, you open your mouth for him, moaning as he invades every crevice of your jaw. Your throat constricts and you retch around the warm heat. Yagi is unapologetic and downright brutal as he pulls back before bringing his hips forward again.
The two men's moans empty into the office room and your garbled cooking is ignored as they both have their fill, leaving you to wonder if this really was for you. Numbness invaded your senses as you come again on Endeavor's cock with him not that far behind as he blows his load into your pussy. "It's been a while I will admit." Endeavor slaps your pussy once, then twice just to feel you squeeze down on him every time your hips jerked.
Tears and drool running down your face the faster your father fucks your throat and you knew you'd be sore the next day. "My turn." All Might pulls out and walks away not even showing you a glance as you choke from the lack of oxygen. Enji helps you sit up and wipes your face before Toshinori is pulling you away from Endeavor showing no care that his cock was still in you. He sits down and pulls you onto his own lap ignoring your dazed look as your brain struggles with the various changes of attitude.
"You gotta thank daddy for helping you meet your hero, don't you think?” His hand cups your round cheeks before the other slams down on the other one. Overestimated tears tremble down your brown skin as you hiccup, "Yes daddy." You rock against his cock, both your saliva and his own precum staining your stomach and public hair.
He fills you, even better than Endeavor did, and begins his onslaught of thrusts. You scream, the sound no doubt traveling outside the room, "Daddy please fuck me!!!" The speed at which you were moving was one that could only be done by a hero and it was more pain than pleasure. The constant pounding of your cervix makes your teeth clench together each time his mushroom head punches it.
"Yes, give daddy this sloppy pussy, squeeze down for me-oh fuck!" Lewd words you never even believed Yagi was capable of saying leave his lips. Your shoulder is bit by the redheaded man behind you as he cups your breasts together, tugging on your nipple before rubbing the nubbed patterns on your areolas. "I can't take it any more daddy please!" Your arms wrap around his shoulders as he causes your pussy to queen and cream, balls slapping the underside of your ass, sticky with Endeavor’s cum.
"This is what you raised Yagi? A little whore?" Yagi chuckles, "I'm just as surprised as you are Enji, say why don't you join? You aren't one and done are you?" Endeavor scoffs, you wish that upon me don't you?"
Your mind, altered with lust, does not understand the hidden meaning behind the word "join" but you soon realize it when fat fingers are pushing their way in the same hole Toshinori occupied. "E-Endeavor?" You're shushed as his fingers pump inside you with Yagi’s cock, curling and prodding your walls at every turn. You feel fuller than you ever thought you could and the pressure only continued.
"Look at my pretty little girl taking her daddy's cock, so fucking tight for me. Can you do this for Endeavor too? Fit both our fat cocks in your hero guzzling hole?" You nod at the degradation and feel the warmth from Endeavor envelope your back. His tip massages the stretched opening as Yagi stops thrusting for a moment.
There is silence, and then there is pain. You hardly feel the initial penetration of Enji’s cock, but you do feel it when Yagi tries to move again. You can hardly breathe between the sandwich the 3 of you created and your comfort is practically ignored as they both begin to move at opposite tempos. “O-oh god!” With your eyes screwed shut and mouth agape the two men grunt against your ears.
Your g-spot and cervix are both pushed against as their thrusts become more impersonal. Endeavor grabs your arms from around Yagi’s neck before pulling them behind your back. Your legs tremble uselessly around Toshinori’s thighs. His breath huffing the more he exerted himself steam easily slipping from his lips the faster he went. “I’m gonna cum!” Endeavor grunts, pistoning out of you even faster than he was before. A hand rests on his shoulder and he’s shoved back making you whimper from the partial emptiness. “Not inside bastard.”
Yagi becomes his gental self again as his still hard cock slips from your entrance. He places you on the ground giving you time to prop yourself up before grabiing his dick and stroking it infront of your face. You are to fucked out to do anything but present yourself as a pretty little canvas as his cum paints your face. You lick the small drops painting your chin before flashing a coy smile, “Thank you Daddy!”
#tw: inc*st#endeavor smut#all might smut#endeavor x all might x reader#mha smut#problimatic works#mha x black reader
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Smth with Tom and actress!reader where they're working on a movie together and everybody ships them and they secretly like each other, but he already has an overcontrolling girlfriend, so in an interview he tries to deny the rumors, but actually overdoes it and ends up offending reader? Your choice on how to end it, if angst to angstest or angst to fluff~
you’re a great actor, you know? || t.h x actress!reader (+18! smut!)
word count: 4.5k
pairing; tom holland x actress!reader
n/a: omg i am so sorry it took me so long to write. I really didn't think this request was going to be more than 4K words long. I really hope you like it. I know you didn't ask for smut, but I was actually inspired for this one, so I hope you don't have a problem with this. I didn't proofread myself before posting so I apologize in advance if this contains any errors. I remind you that French is not my native langage.
warning(s) : smut (mutual distant masturbation) swear, angst, mention of alcohol.
taglist; @angeliquekalampoka @harryhollandsgirlfriend @reawritesthings (thank you so much for you help and support!) @cedricdiggorysimpp @hogwartsmarvelmommy (thank you so much too for you help and support!) @allthisfortommy @delightfulmuffinclamauthor @kimberlyemerys @mcushvft @ecarlette99 if you want to be notified on all of my future writings, you can add yourself in my taglist here
Your eyes burned with desire as they scanned your co-star's torso, his suspenders still hanging from his shoulders to prevent his civil war period pants from falling. Who's making the carpentry with the shirt off? Tom's manly hands worked the wood, his biceps contracting with every movement he made, his callused fingers smoothed the surface of the furniture under construction. You swallow hard before biting your lip. His brown curls were falling over his eyes and you suddenly dreamed of running your hands through them or that his curls tickle your inner thighs while his tongue took care of your warm and wet spot, just for him. You remembered that your colleague told you that he had trained as a carpenter, all like part of the male members of his family, as a back-up solution if he didn’t become an actor. He had told you that he was happy that it could be of use to him now, but you didn't think it would be so hot to see him work. Your whole body was a furnace, heat radiating every inch of your skin. You raised your cup of coffee to your lips, trying to suppress a grimace at the coldness of the liquid.
"Cut!" you heard. "Y/N, you winced as you drank from your cup ..."
"Yeah, sorry, sorry. Would it be possible to heat the coffee or give me water instead?" you asked nicely.
One of the director's assistants reached out to grab your cup. Your eyes were lost in the direction of your co-star who was getting up from the top of the cabinet. Tom gave you a warm smile and your heart skipped a beat. It wasn't hard to play out the desire for his character when literally your whole body was reacting to his sight. Sometimes you could feel a connection with the British. The only major problem: Tom had a girlfriend. You weren't that kind of girl to get involved in an already established relationship. You liked your partner, found him attractive, you felt close to him but never revealed those feelings to him, because he was taken. It was not your place; the seat was taken. However, a little hope burned deep within you, the dream that he felt the same, an illusory utopia in which he would leave his current girlfriend for you. Tom's girlfriend was on set, visiting, and you could feel his frozen gaze on you. Your eyes locked with hers and you could see an authoritative, territorial glow. Tom was hers, not yours. Your eyes narrowed in an annoyed expression, your irises almost silently defying the woman standing in front of you. You would never attempt anything of course, but you didn't like to be stared at, you also hated possessiveness. Nothing about your behavior with Tom off the set could suggest any ambiguity. So, it turned out that Tom's girlfriend just didn't like you playing her boyfriend's love interest, on screen. But, hey, that was part of the job, right? This girl was dating Tom, she knew that her career required screen shares with actresses in a romantic plot, isn't it? The assistant director brought you your cup, warning you that this time it was only water. You nodded and your gaze fell on Tom again. His hairdresser was reworking his curls a bit to make them appear a little damper. A little pinch in your stomach reminded you that you wanted so badly to be in this woman's shoes.
"Is everything good on set?"
The director asked to everyone to get back in their place, you settled down correctly on your brand, leaning on the fictitious stoop and the boss then shouted "Action". The scene picked up a few moments from where it had left off earlier.
Your eyes scanned Tom, working with wood, and you drank your "coffee" - which was now water - dreamily. Your co-star glanced at you with a smirk that fell to the ground. He stopped in his movements, placing the hammer on his wood desk to turn fully towards you and approach.
"I will end up believin’ that you’re only callin’ me to look at me ma'am" he said in a somewhat gruff, country accent.
“You might be right, but if I am asked, I will deny everything altogether” You replied nicely. A smile almost as brazen as the Brit in front of you.
Tom grabbed your hip, slamming you against him. You half opened your lips by planting your feverish gaze in his eyes to reveal the desire that consumed between you.
"Ma’am, it’s not respectable from you, you’re an engaged woman"
Out of context, this scene looked like bad porn. The first time you read it you remembered laughing out loud, even more so the first time you repeated it with Tom, who had thought the same thing. It took both of you a lot of hours of preparation not to laugh today, during the shoot. But the film was beautiful, the context was even more beautiful, you were wearing that civil war pioneer costume.
"But I'm not married yet ... and my husband isn't giving me the attention I deserve"
Tom's leg was between your thighs and despite the petticoat and vintage underwear, the pressure was enough to make you really horny, without having to act for the camera. You let out a small moan as your co-star moved closer to you, delivering his cue before you jumped to his lips in a languid kiss. It was in the script but deep down you weren't sure if you were acting or not. Tom lifted you up while leaning against the wooden column on the porch, keeping your legs around him despite your petticoat. Your hands clung to his shoulders while taking care to drop his straps. With a hasty hand he pulled his pants down just below his butt. His lips were on your throat and your hands were running through his curls before you pushed him away.
"Not here. Someone could see us." you said, your voice a little rocky with horniness.
God you wanted this to be real. Your co-star grabbed you by the legs again in a rush, you let out a little cry of surprise before laughing, wrapped like a Koala around Tom who came through the doorway while kissing you again.
"And cut"
Suffice to say that it was not a good day to visit her boyfriend on a film set. Tom's girlfriend looked like a real dragon when you laid your eyes on her, still in Tom's arms, because he loved walking with you and laughing after the scene. His laughter filled the room as he let out another of his stupid jokes:
"Does my character get clamydia? Because by wearing this koala, I have doubts about my sexual health"
You burst out laughing before hopping on your own two feet, firmly on the ground, not without a little slip. The petticoat is really not suitable for the stunts. You dusted off your costume and your head turned to Tom's girlfriend again. You could almost believe smoke was coming out of her nostrils and if her eyes were daggers you would be dead by now. The film crew however found their joke very funny since a few seconds later, the entire set and its employees were laughing at Tom's nonsense, just like you had done a few seconds earlier. You slapped your fist on Tom's shoulder with an amused smile before tilting your head towards his molten girlfriend.
"You should join your girlfriend, Holland, instead of clowning."
Tom rolled his eyes before kissing your cheek and heading towards the thundering dragon, not forgetting to wink at you. Was he actually flirting with you in the presence of his girlfriend? You shook your head as you chased the idea, happy that the first part of that day of filming was over.
Everyone was going to sleep, well that's what he thought.
Comfortably seated on the sofa, t-shirt and boxers as the only casual outfit, sunk under a thin blanket, Tom was reading the script for tomorrow's scene. A scene he already knew and which had already warmed his cheeks at the first reading. But tomorrow he had to be ready. His eyes went through lines of text, little dialogue, a lot of action. And the more he read, the tighter his boxers got, he tried to stretch the fabric to make himself more comfortable but nothing helped. Tom had a fucking erection right in the middle of the living room reading his script. He heaved a sigh of desolation. He should have gone up to his room and made love to his girlfriend, reduced that tension between his legs ... but he didn't want to ... worse yet, he knew if he did, it wouldn't be her that he would think of. It had been a long day and the scene earlier had made him a little exhilarated. After all, the "bad porn" scene he and you were having fun portraying had the desired effect. And then his girlfriend flustered him. She wasn't wrong, the tension between you and him was there and he was attracted to you.
Tom put the script on the coffee table, glancing around him before repositioning himself on the sofa. His right hand to cross under the blanket and he came to feel his penis through his boxers, releasing a small sigh of comfort. His fingers began to weigh down his testicles as his thumb stroked up and down his cock through the fabric of his underwear. He tilted his head back on the armrest of the sofa, enjoying his own medicine, his lips and eyebrows pursed.
You stayed for the night. Despite the storm that was Tom's girlfriend, you had spent the evening in his rental house with several members of the team. Tom's girlfriend went to bed angry and soon enough and you stayed so late that Tom offered to take one of the extra bedrooms. You called it a night before your co-star, but now you were awake, uncomfortable with the room temperature. You needed some freshness and you got up slowly to go down to the kitchen. You only had reached the bottom of the stairs when you heard a noise, or rather, a sigh. Discreetly, you tilted your head and saw a figure lying on the sofa. A rustle of fabric caught your attention again, a soft moan accompanying it, making your body heat up more than it already was, but in a new sensation. Another moan was heard.
Tom was quite oblivious. His hand continued to stroke his hard cock through his boxers but he needed more. That's why he grabbed his dick straight into his underwear, making him sigh with glee once again. Images of this day of filming came back in his mind; how this period corset curved your boobs, so inviting ... How your breath was so erratic, the way he pressed his knee between your legs, wishing you weren't wearing this civil war costume. Tom leaned his head back on the armrest, letting his hand guide him into his own desire.
"So pretty for me, y/n"
You were still in shock at what you heard now, but an unseen force made you sit in front of the stairs as quietly as possible with your legs spread. It was incredibly sexy and the warmth you had felt before was nothing compared to that moment. Your hand slipped under the elastic of your improvised pajamas. It was bad, so bad. Someone could come down at any time and find you there, lying on the stairs, touching you as Tom did the same thing, without seeing you, a few feet away. Your fingers caressed your lace panties, putting pressure on your folds already swollen with desire. Tom's moans and his praise for your fictitious self, brought you into one of the hottest fantasies and you could imagine the British between your legs, your fingers replaced by his. You have inserted a finger in you, not without pressing your free hand against your mouth, pinching your nose to avoid moaning too loudly. But Tom was still unconscious, in his own high, as his hand picked up the pace on his hard red cock, about to unleash his intense pleasure just imagining you beneath him, moaning his name.
"Fuck, Y/N"
Your hips sank under your fingers at the hearing of your name coming out of her mouth again, you had just started your torture that you were already ready to losing ground. Your pace was rushed, strong and passionate but damn, you wanted this man, this man who had a girlfriend and yet moaned your name on the living room couch. You felt your toes twitch, your head thrown back against the staircase wall, your hand still pressed against your mouth to silence you. But the moan of your orgasm has escaped you.
For a moment, in his own orgasm, Tom thought he heard your muffled voice with lust, his cock contracting even more in his hand as his cum covered his hand. He threw his head back on the armrest again, closing his eyes to take a few seconds to recover from his orgasm. The guilt only invaded him a few minutes after the realization: He had just masturbated while thinking of you while his girlfriend was sleeping in a room above him; he was screwed.
You wiped your hand on your pajamas before holding on to the railing to gently get up. Without a word, you went up the stairs ... Never mind for that glass of water you wanted to take ...
The next day, Tom had asked his girlfriend not to appear on the set, out of respect for her ... Well, that was his biggest excuse ... he didn't want her to see how this sex scene disturbed him and how much he loved this idea of him fucking you passionately in period costumes. You never talked about what happened, Tom never knew you were on the stairs the other night, he never knew your little secret ... The scene, well that choreographed, was so intense but so insincere at the same time. Sometimes you could hear when Tom wasn't playing but you also knew when one of his moans was real, even though you weren't actually having sex. Because it was nice to laugh about it but your film was not made in the framework of the porn industry.
Months had passed, the press tour had started last week. You weren't surprised to see Tom's girlfriend join in behind the scenes in a few interviews. She liked so much to analyze all the behaviors of her boyfriend to blame him later, initiating the argument. You could see that Tom wasn't happy but you were just the good friend. His makeup artist would go out of her way to try and hide the dark circles under his eyes and as your hairdresser added the finishing touches to your hairstyle, you smirked at Tom out of the corner of your lips.
"Tough night?"
"If only that was what you were thinking ..."
You wanted to yell at her "why don't you leave her?" but you held back. Your hand simply landed on your co-star's thigh in a reassuring gesture. But it did not escape the journalist's eyes. The man had worked with Tom before, so your co-star wasn't going into new territory. But without knowing why, you felt it really tense ... And you quickly discovered the reason for this tension.
"Y/N you're pretty new to the movie industry and for a big lead role you found yourself shooting some very intimate, nude scenes with your co-star. Tell us, how was that, being so intimate with Tom Holland? "
You let out an embarrassed chuckle, the question was meant to make you uncomfortable, and the fact that the reporter was talking to you like Tom wasn't in the room made you nervous. You sat back in your chair with a tight smile.
"I'm not sure. Whatever my answer would be, I could piss off his fans greatly."
"Oh, come on ... not even a small impression?"
"Let's just say he's not the most obnoxious person to play this kind of scene with or even watch in general."
The journalist's smirk reflected an "I feel you, girl" and a "I'm not done with this bullshit." He tilted his head, his eyes turning to Tom.
“That's a compliment to you Tom. And you, it was your first intimate scene in the movies for you too. And from the footage… it's scorching, you even seemed pretty comfortable with it. How did your girlfriend take it when she saw the first pictures? "
Tom tensed too, he bit the inside of his lips before looking at you and then at the reporter. He leaned down from his seat to take a sip of water and cracked his neck before letting out a laugh that sounded so wrong in your ear. It didn't amuse him, you knew that.
"Come on, man ... What can I say? Like a girlfriend watching her partner be intimate with another. But she knows it's cinema, it's our job."
There was a game between your co-star and the reporter, like a man-to-man, brother-to-brother bond. The advantage of having already worked together but above all, that Tom is so natural in his words. Yet this is what pushed the man further in his questions.
"Your on-screen chemistry is still intense. Those kinds of scenes should bring you closer, though."
"Of course, we get along well off the set y/n and I but yeah, you know ... it's still weird ... It's a bit like sleeping with the nice and shy neighbor that your mom has been trying to settle you with since you were a teenager ... It's nice but it's still weird and platonic. "
Your throat tightened at his words. The performance he had just made hit you in the stomach and you were hurt and angry at the same time. In your head you were screaming and your rage was telling you to retort that it was weird for him to say that when he had jerked off the night before your sex scene, whispering your name. But you knew it was better to say nothing at all, for your career and hers. You put on your best smile, hiding your hurt feelings, you just faked a laugh and looked at the reporter.
"Yeah, I was going to say he was like a brother, but the neighbor's shot is more original."
The interview ended with a few questions about the film to which you answered with the usual speeches already pre-written by the production team. At the end of the interview, you have to thank the reporter, your tongue pushing against your teeth, your smile twitching. Tom turned to you and sighed dramatically.
"Pfff, the hard part is over. Last interview of the day. Would you like to grab a bee..."
"Fuck off, Holland." you cut him off, releasing the tension you felt during the interview before leaving the room, your assistant on your back.
Your uber was already there and you almost jumped in to get back to your hotel. As soon as you got back, you undressed to put on a bathrobe and did what any girl would do in a cliché romantic movie: call room service to have champagne delivered to you. You told your assistant that you wanted to be alone and for once she listened to you, not without wondering if you were okay. She was a lovely woman, about your age, maybe a little younger, very concerned about your sanity and your interests. You assured her that you just wanted to have an evening of your own. And she left you alone.
The champagne drunkenness was the worst: it was delicious, you didn't feel the alcohol rising and you were quickly intoxicated. You were lying on your bed, your mouth full of chocolate - more cliché than you, you're dying! - the bottle of champagne completely empty. You leaned over the phone and called room service to ask for another bottle when there was a knock on the door. In your drunken state your eyes widened, surprise /
"Wow, that was quick" you said to the receptionist before hanging up.
You stumbled to the door. You were pathetic. Make you sick for a man, who wasn't even single. Speaking of the wolf - well rather the spider, in his case -. Tom stood there; his forehead creased by your appearance. You laughed at your previous thought - that of the spider -. Then you frowned, you didn't want to see him but he was still there.
"Can I come in or is the party private?" he asked in a half-amused, half-frustrated tone.
In a burst of contention, you opened the door and turned your back on him to your bed, which you sat on the end of, not caring whether Tom would come in or not. But he came in and he looked worried.
"Y/N, have you been drinking?"
"No, shit?! Good's on that, Sherlock" you said sarcastically.
Tom closed the door behind him before approaching you but you reached out to stop him. You shook your head negatively. No kindness, no kind Tom's best friend. You were fed up with this game.
"You are a great actor, you know?"
He wanted to speak, confused by your words but you stopped him in his tracks. It was your turn to speak, it was your moment. He had disturbed you in your drunken moment so he was going to listen. Why was he even there, after all?
"That sometimes you wonder what the line is between fact and fiction."
Your co-star wasn't sure where to look, he didn't understand why you were in this state and he really did care. Besides, you had been so cold after his interview, he had to understand. Did all of this have a connection?
You laughed alone, absorbed in your thoughts. You grabbed the champagne glass that barely had a left champagne in it - which is why you ordered another bottle in the first place - and then you kind of toast, pointing at Tom with your glass.
“You're an enigmatic character all on your own, Tom Holland" you said, by marking the intonation on his name. "You give sweet and funny, perfect boyfriend vibes, while giving off a fuck boy vibe that takes you against a wall bluntly. That's what makes you a good actor ... " you paused." "Just like now! A few months ago, you jerked off while blowing my name in your living room during the shooting ... and now ... you say about me that I am the nice little neighbor who 'we fuck for pity. "
You put your hands dramatically against your lips, hissing a little "oops" as Tom's eyes widened in surprise. How could she even know this intimate moment?
"Wh-what? How do you know that?" he asked with a shaking voice
You chuckled, drunk, the deceptively guilty expression. You could be such a bitch when you were drunk.
"It was supposed to be a secret."
You have swept your words with your hand, the champagne flute still between your fingers.
"You are playing with me, Holland. And I don't like it. What you said was hurtful!"
"I am not. Y/N, I am not play-"
"And you know what's funny, Tom? You know?" you cut him off, for the umpteenth time tonight.
"Uh no."
"No, of course not. Well, here's the funny thing: it's not respectable from you, mister. You have a girlfriend." You imitated his line from your movie with your own words and an attempt at a masked British accent in a South American accent wanting to sound like Tom and his character.
Tom really didn't know where to go. It was too much for him. He who had just come to get answers to your behavior now had some, but it was way beyond what he expected. You were drunk declaring your love to him while reproaching him for still being in a relationship, without taking his own feelings into account.
"And you know what's sad ... is that, damn ... I really thought you liked me."
"You're drunk, Y/N. We're not having this discussion."
You suddenly started to cry and Tom felt really helpless in the face of the scene in front of you. No lie, you looked pathetic.
Your co-star ended up approaching you and, in your vulnerability, you let him. Slowly, he took the glass of champagne and placed it on the entryway cabinet, then hugged you. You buried your nose against him, too drunk to care about your behavior. You were still mad at him, but the softness of his arms was so good, everything was heartwarming. Tom kissed you on the top of your head as he rocked you.
"I like you. I didn't know how to tell you." He spoke.
"What a romantic way to declare yourself." You joked, slightly laugh in his shirt.
“You said it,” he joked too, still hugging you.
"But you have a girlfriend."
"I was about to leave her. I didn't expect to receive a drunken outburst of love in the meantime, that's all."
You laughed again, lighter. The point of your feelings flew away, relieved to have confided your love, even in an advanced state of intoxication. Even more relieved to know that Tom shared your feelings. You frowned, however, as the words came back to you, your eyes plunged into hers in a confused pout.
"But ... earlier?."
"I'm sorry about that. I didn't mean to offend you… I just didn't know how to shut up this guy…"
You pursed your lips, your brows furrowed, still nodding your head to say that you understood - well, more or less -. Tom smiled you really looked adorable when you were drunk ... well, when you didn't look like an evil bitch ... he kissed your forehead, then your nose, then when he got to the level of your lips, he hesitated, before kissing the corner of them.
"I really like you ... really, really like you. But I'm not an asshole cheating on his girlfriend. Let's leave some time to digest tonight. Let me break up with my girlfriend before I can properly kiss you."
You simply hummed an answer, his scent had invaded your nostrils from the moment he hugged you, his words were soft as cotton, just like the tone of his voice and without wanting to offend him, you had started to fall asleep. The Briton let out a laugh before kissing you on the forehead and pulling you over to the bed to tuck you in. Tom brushed off a strand of your hair admiring your beauty. Even with the mascara that had run off, even with the messy hair and the boozy breath, you looked beautiful. Fearsome, but beautiful.
"Good night, Y/N".
He kissed your forehead again before leaving the room with a smile, knowing that his feelings for you were mutual.
That night, Tom left his girlfriend.
#tom holland#tom holland x reader#tom holland fic#tom holland x yn#tom holland imagine#tom holland smut#tom holland x you
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Hi, I loved crazy love. Literally I become obsessed, so I was wondering if you could write something about them when they are moving to their new apartment near to college and both of their families are helping them to have everything in order, but Rafe only want them to leave to be all alone with you in their new home. Maybe a little bit of smut?
a/n: this idea had my heart bc i'd really been wanting to write something like this ;) i hope you enjoy! thanks so much for the request!
Warnings: swearing, smut, mentions of planned pregnancy, discussion of sex
crazy love masterlist
my writing
our home: crazy love blurb - rafe cameron
"No, no a little to the left. Ward, are you listening to me?"
You sigh as you set the very last box down on the kitchen counter, stealing a glance at Rafe, who is sitting on your new couch. His head is in his hands as he listens to his parents bicker back and forth, trying to hang up the painting they had bought the two of you. Rose had gushed over it when she bought it, telling you it would match the rest of your decor perfectly.
"Of course, darling. You're talking loud enough," Ward gripes, shifting the painting to the left as Rose demands.
"Oh, come on, now. Back over to the right-"
"It's straight!" Rafe raises his voice, standing up from the couch.
You inhale sharply and step into the living room of your new apartment, wrapping an arm around him to try and calm him down. Ever since his parents and Wheezie arrived with the moving truck to help you both, he's been on edge. When your parents showed up with Macy, you thought he was about to go into cardiac arrest.
"Actually, I think it might just be straight," Rose nods, "Good eye, Rafe."
"Thanks so much," he remarks sarcastically.
"Hey," you whisper to him, trying to tell him to quit being mean to his step-mom, "They're here to help, remember?"
Rafe rolls his eyes, "I could do this shit myself."
"Because you're such a handy man?" you snort.
Rafe clenches his jaw as he looks down at you, but can't help the smirk on his face. He pulls you closer to him, leaving a gentle kiss on your forehead.
"Where did Macy and Wheezie go? They should start on those kitchen boxes," Rose tells Ward, stepping away from her husband to look for them.
"We can handle the kitchen boxes," Rafe tells her.
"Y/N?" Rose looks to you for a final answer.
You glance up at Rafe only for a second, noting the look on his face, then nod your head in agreement.
"I like the kitchen organized a certain way, anyway," you tell her with a smile.
She nods her head, "All right. Ward and I can start on your sheets-"
"Y/N's parents are taking care of that," Rafe informs her.
Wheezie and Macy come tumbling into the front door, running past all of you and into your bedroom with your parents.
"What the hell are those two up to?" Ward questions.
Wheezie and Macy have become as thick as thieves, the best of friends, over the summer. One day, you'd shown up at Rafe's only to find your sister in her kitchen with Wheezie, baking away. Ever since then, you and Rafe have had to be extra quiet upstairs.
Rose and Ward step toward your bedroom as well, which is down a small hallway just off the kitchen. Rafe grabs your hand and yanks you with him, following the crowd of people.
"Can everyone get out of our bedroom, please?" Rafe grumbles, standing behind his father and watching your parents finish up making your bed.
Your parents had not been crazy about you and Rafe living together right as you both make the transition to college. You had cried, begged, threatened to not go to school, and even dragged Rafe over for a family dinner so all of you could talk the situation out. You'd never seen Rafe's face so red as the night he had to sit at a dinner table and discuss with your father how the two of you would be sleeping in the same bed.
When your parents found out that the Camerons would be financing your rent bill, however, the living situation had changed. Your parents hadn't realized how expensive dorm living is, and the thought of not having to pay for housing on top of tuition sounded like a dream come true.
Which is how you land in your new, empty kitchen, trying to hold Rafe back from killing every family member the two of you currently have within arms reach.
"It's quarter to three," your dad tells your mother over your bed.
"Macy," your mom speaks, "Get your stuff, honey. We have to get going."
"Yeah," Rafe perks up, earning the attention of his parents, "You guys should get moving, too. Y'know, lots of traffic, and Wheezie's got that thing early in the morning."
Wheezie opens her mouth to speak, but stops suddenly when Rafe gives her the death stare. She looks to you, to which you just shrug, and then turns back to her parents.
"What thing?" Rose asks her. Ward's phone buzzes in his pocket, earning his attention.
"Uh," Wheezie hesitates, looking to Rafe once more.
"Girl scout meeting," Rafe blurts.
You cover your face with your free hand to try and prevent Rose from seeing your laughter. You truly have no idea where Rafe gets this idea that Wheezie is old enough to be in girl scouts. Wheezie narrows her eyes at him, shaking her head slightly.
"Girl scout?" Rose questions to herself, still trying to figure it out when Ward speaks up, eyes still glued to his phone.
"Wheezie, get your stuff. You won't want to be tired in the morning at your meeting."
Wheezie rolls her eyes but does as she's told, making her way out of your bedroom and down the hall to collect her things in the living room.
"Seriously, Rafe?" she hisses, "Girl scouts? I'm fourteen-"
"Shut up, Wheeze," Rafe says back to her through gritted teeth.
Wheezie turns to you, "He's your problem, now."
"Oh, boy, do I know it," you tease Rafe, smiling with Wheezie. She laughs, but it's short lived when Rafe shoves her away.
"Get your shit," he mutters.
"Stop it," you demand, stepping in front of him and holding onto his forearms as they are wrapped around your waist.
The one thing you love about Rafe more than anything is how he always shows affection to you, even if your parents or his parents are around. He just doesn't seem to care about anyone except you.
"I want them to go," he defends himself, keeping his voice quiet, "I just want to be alone with you. In our home. I didn't realize that was such a difficult request."
You smile up at your fussy boy, dragging one hand up to his face to stroke his cheek. You can faintly hear your families moving around the two of you, but you're too lost in your own little world to think too much about it.
"Be patient," you whisper to him.
He smirks, "Will you make it worth my while?"
You give him back the same look, loving the way he smirks at you and allows his eyes to rake over every inch of your face and torso. It takes everything in him not to just grab you by the throat and kiss the hell out of you, only controlling himself because your dad is ten feet away.
"Don't I always?"
Rafe groans, trying his best to keep his composure. He has to close his eyes as he continues to whine, knowing that if he keeps looking at you, he'll be hard in no time.
"All right," Rafe says loudly, tugging himself away from you, "Thanks for coming, everyone, but we have a lot to unpack here. Dad, Rose, Wheezie, I'll show you to the door."
You snicker as you watch him attempt to lead his confused family out the door. You turn to your own family, giving hugs and promising to call whenever you can. Rose refuses to leave without giving you a hug, which pisses Rafe off, as he's gotten Ward and Wheezie out successfully and only needs one more.
Rose promises to send flowers, one that match the color scheme of course, and tells you she'll call you to check on Rafe, since he doesn't bother to return her calls. You give Wheezie a hug and give Ward a polite smile and wave from the doorway.
The second they're all out the door, Rafe slams the door shut and locks it before any of them can decide they forgot something.
"Ah, free at last," you joke.
Rafe turns around, licking his lips as he thinks about how you two finally have an empty house and he has you all to himself. No distractions, no parents, no little sisters listening intently at the door for secrets and drama. He eyes you up and down once, and when he brings his blue orbs to meet yours again, you know what he's thinking.
"Come here," he demands, but he can't help himself.
That boy rushes over to you, pushing you up against the wall in the entryway of your new apartment, kissing you as if his life depends on it. You accept his kiss without a second thought, allowing your hands to wrap themselves around his neck.
"Up," he mutters against your lips, hands guiding themselves to your waist as you jump up and let him position himself in between your legs, wrapping them around his torso.
He moves his kisses to your cheek, then your jawline, then your neck, while his hands relentlessly roam your ass.
"Rafe," you say, tilting your neck to give him more space.
"Hmm," he hums against your skin, not stopping or slowing down for anything.
"I really do have to unpack the kitchen if you want to eat dinner tonight," you tell him, although you're fully aware he would never set you down for anything right now.
"Not hungry."
"Rafe-"
"I think," he stops you, wet kisses trailing your collarbone, "We should fuck everywhere. Y'know, break the place in."
Even though you two have been together for a while, him saying things like that to you always seems to send tingles through your whole body. He always knew what to say, what to do, to get you riled up in all the right ways.
"That would take us all night," you whisper, smirking because you already know what he's going to say.
"Fine with me, baby."
You smile, then reach down and grab ahold of his cheek with your hand. You lead his lips back to yours, kissing him harder than you had been before. He moans into your mouth and you know you have him right where you want him now.
"Kitchen first?" he questions, breathless, "Or should we mess up that pretty little bed your parents just made up?"
The raspiness in his voice gets you going, enough for him to notice you squirming in his grip. He grins, knowing exactly what it is you need.
"Kitchen," you tell him, watching as he barely nods before he kisses you again, carrying you over and setting you on the counter.
With ease, he removes your shorts and underwear, dropping his own shorts to the floor beneath him. He kicks all of the clothes away, knowing the two of you won't be needing them for a very long time.
"I can't wait, baby," he mumbles, excusing his lack of foreplay.
You shake your head, and he already knows you don't mind based on the way you're dripping onto the granite, "Please, Rafe."
He smirks and then grunts as he enters you, breathing out a sigh of relief that you two are finally home.
By the time you and Rafe even make it to your bedroom, he has to carry you because your legs can't physically function anymore. Rafe's proud of his work, but pretended to pout when he finished you off on the couch and you told him you needed a break.
He lays you down on your new, freshly made bed, moving the pillows out of your way and tucking you underneath the duvet. He climbs in beside you and molds you into his body almost instantly, inhaling your shampoo scent and perfume, thinking about how perfect this moment truly is.
"I can't believe it," he whispers.
"I know."
"Our home."
"Yes, it is."
You two lay there for a while, staring out at the tens of boxes that have each of your names written on them, just begging to be unpacked. You're sure Rafe's boxes will still be sitting there in two weeks, as he had packed a separate duffle bag of his 'essential' belongings.
"You know," he starts after a while, a devious smirk finding it's way to his cheeks, "The next big step is having a mini you. Or a mini me. But, I'd rather have a mini you."
"We just moved into our college apartment and you're talking about impregnating me," you laugh, as if to ask him if he's serious.
"She'll be so cute," he goes on, "A little girl that looks just like you. And she'd have your smarts, thank God, because she'd be screwed with mine. But she'd have my humor, of course."
"Of course?" you tease him.
"And then we'll have a boy."
"Wow, Rafe Cameron, you really just have this all figured out," you move your head up to look at him, noting the small, cheesy smile plastered across his face.
"I do, baby. He'll be a hellion, though. Never listening, always running away, but a total momma's boy. Never wants you to leave his side-"
"So, just like his dad, then?" you grin, watching Rafe clench his jaw and shake his head.
"Break's over," he grunts, rolling you on your back and climbing on top of you, "We're trying, now."
"No, we're not," you say forcefully.
Rafe rolls his eyes, "I'm joking. We'll wait until, like, junior year or something."
"Rafe."
"Fine. But the second you walk across that stage with your diploma, I'm putting a baby in you."
"Deal."
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Just wanted to say 2 things:
1)Love the fic where he proposed over a cup of tea…so sweet💗
2) we all know how H has asthma sometimes so…could u write something w/the reader helping him with an attack idk or during an interview/concert/family gathering do as u pls
A nice day
XOXO
firstly, thank you so much that’s so sweet of you <33 and secondly, um yes i would love to give this a go at writing for you! hope you enjoy;
Harry couldn’t breathe.
He was in a panic, completely terrified of the uncontrollable situation. He was having an asthma attack concocted with a panic attack and it was brutal.
“Shit,” Jeff whispered as he watched Harry breathe heavily and loudly on the floor. His friend was currently on his hands and knees trying to gasp for air, whilst dressed in his notorious Fine Line outfit.
It was the big night. The one night only at The Forum for the release of his new album Fine Line, hence the costume. He had been nervous all day, with shaking hands and a tendency to forget simple things. You had been with him all day; having a slow brunch together out in the Hollywood Hills and then just chilling around for the afternoon. You didn’t want to anything to strain his voice, so talking hadn’t been an option. That left you either to sleeping and cuddling, whilst watching a movie, or sex. Now you were all for sex, but Harry complained that he liked talking to you during it and so that got shut down pretty quickly. You didn’t forget what he whispered to your ear though just before you cuddled into watching Bambi;
“Keep your moans for later, you’ll be fucking needing them for what I have planned.”
But that was over two hours ago now. Harry had been whisked away to start getting ready, what with hair and makeup first. You’d left him to it, telling him you would just lounge around and wait for him. It was when he was getting into costume had you announced you were just going to go down the street to get some coffee from Dunkin’ - seeing as there were few of them back in England, where you most commonly lived with Harry. The problem was you hadn’t come back yet, and it was an hour later.
“Harry mate, you need to calm down.” Kid Harpoon told him carefully, kneeling down next to his good friend. Nothing was working though and Harry was too breathless to ask anyone for his inhaler.
It had started by thinking about how nervous he actually was for tonight. It was such a huge show and one of a kind too. He was playing his new album and it wasn’t even 24 hours old yet. There was so much pressure weighing him down that he couldn’t breathe - he was suffocating in the anxiety of his own mind and he couldn’t escape at all. Then because he was in so much of a panic his asthma hit him and added another reason to his breathlessness. It was finally made worst when he realised you weren’t by his side to help him. You weren’t there to quickly eliminate the asthma and focus on helping him overcome the panic attack, instead he had his mates surrounding him - crowding him - and they didn’t know the first thing to do.
“Sarah, where’s Y/N?” Mitch shouted, making Harry squint the thought away. He didn’t want to think about how something back might’ve happened or might be happening to you. Where were you? Sarah’s response did no better to help him.
“I don’t know.”
“Harry bud. Talk to us.” Jeff spoke, crouched down in front of him. Harry shook his head, tears running from his eyes as he began crying. The sobs were really harsh and embarrassing. The tears were heavy and mixed with snot running from his nose to pool on the floor below him. He was not doing well at all, coughing when the asthma choked him up. He couldn’t do this. He felt like he was in a small box and it was only getting smaller. He felt as if he were going to die. Genuinely.
“Does he look like he can talk, dickward.” Adam’s voice came from the other side of Harry, messing his head up even more. There was so many voices and he couldn’t focus on just one, but he didn’t want to. He wanted yours. He needed yours. You.
Whenever this has happened before he was always luckily in the comfort of his home, or the tour bus and always with you. So this was unfamiliar and terrifying. He was beginning to think you’d left him or you’d gotten seriously hurt, but he couldn’t do anything to help. He was stuck - paralysed to this position as his lungs collapsed in on themselves and his brain sped the same speed as a train. You were his comfort person and it was only ever you that he wanted in situations like these. Just you.
“Move out of my way. Move!” Harry thought he heard you and your voice, but he hated that his mind could be playing tricks on him in desperation for what, or whom, he truly wanted.
He felt someone crash on the floor in front of him and the almighty smell of lavender and soap hit him all at once. This time, he was glad to have someone sit so close to him, because it was you.
“Harry look at me, hey, hey. You’re okay. Look at me bubs.” You spoke calmly, trying not to sound panicked yourself, even if you were heavily worried. You watched as he looked up at you, eyes ridiculously red and puffy whilst his nose was dripping like a leaking tap. You wanted to rub his tears away and dab away the snot, but your main priority was on his breathing first. “Okay good, okay.”
Your hand went into your bag and picked out his inhaler. You shook it a few times, before putting it into Harry’s mouth. “On three, one, two, three…” Harry tried is best to breathe in and you pushed down on the canister. “Good, bubs, really good. Okay again, one, two, three…” You repeated and then a third time until you could tell that the wheezing of his asthma attack had disappeared.
“T-than…” Harry tried to mumble out, but couldnt because he was still in panic and his throat was so dry.
“Sshh you’re okay.” You turned to one of the crew members and asked for them to fetch you a bottle of water. You asked people to clear out of the room and leave you with Harry for a bit, knowing he wouldn’t settle in front of all these people. You sat on the floor, crossed legged, and brought Harry to lay his head in your lap with his body trailing behind. You offered him one of your hands to squeeze if he wanted to, which he appreciated, cupping both of his around yours. Your other hand laid to stroke through his gelled hair - that would no doubt have to be redone now.
Instead of going straight into talking to him, you sang his favourite lullaby to him in aid of calming him down. It always worked, or at least helped a little. You sang quietly, noticing the beat of his heart soften with every line you sung. You were by no means a professional singer like him, but he liked the way it was so imperfect and mellow. It calmed him to hear something so simple and so you. Whilst you sang the crew never came back with your requested water and you thanked them, before you were the only ones left in the room.
After you finished singing you noticed how calm Harry was, almost still - the complete opposite to how he’d been all of 10 minutes ago. It was amazing what the power of you could do to him.
“What colour are we feeling?” You and Harry had created your own little system by which you would let each other know how you’re feeling by a colour of the rainbow. You’d designated a meaning to all of them that only you two could understand and used them on the days when you weren’t feeling great, to help understand each other’s feelings better.
“The whole bloody rainbow.” Harry mumbled out and you passed the water around so he could take a few sips, to which he thanked you graciously for.
“Oi, you can’t have that as your answer.” It was a rule that you could only use one colour to some your most intense emotion in that moment, otherwise there was kind of no point to the system.
“But it’s true. I feel grey with confusion, blue with sadness, purple with frustration, yellow with fear and even light yellow with cowardice. Yet I feel pink with happiness and light red with love.”
“What about red red?” You teased, not being able to help yourself.
“What? Lust? Always, for you that is.” You leant down to kiss his head as he cracked a joke, showing you that your Harry was still there beneath all this worry.
“Tell me what the colours represent in real life.”
“Purple because I am frustrated that I had to have a panic attack right before the biggest show of my career. Yellow because I am frightened that nobody will like the album and it will be a complete fail of a night. Grey because I can’t choose one colour and focus on it. I.. I—”
You could tell he getting himself worked up again, so cut him short. “Bubs stop, you’re okay. Listen to me.” You tucked his hair behind his ear as if to open it up for him to hear better. “Don’t ever be frustrated with yourself for something like this. You are allowed to have moments of weakness; you wouldn’t be human if you didn’t. Did this compromise your show? No. Did this show off how strong and brave you are? Yes. That’s what is important, therefore we can swap purple for dark yellow because you were brave. Which means yellow can also turn to dark yellow because you are so brave for doing something so huge and so wonderful. People already love the album H. Can’t get enough of it. Everyone will sing along to every word, I can promise you that. Or at least I will. You are amazing, so never undersell yourself. That’s important to me and for you. Bubs, you are so amazing for what you’re doing here tonight and I couldn’t be prouder of you. Yes, a panic attack isn’t nice and it isn’t convenient, but it just helps show how much you care about tonight and it going a success. That must count for something.”
He didn’t say anything for a bit and that was okay. He was most likely getting his thoughts together and mentally preparing himself for the greatest night of his life. You bent your body over so you could hug him, since his back was to your front, and just give him a squeeze to reiterate how proud you are of him.
“Y/N.” Harry spoke quietly, as your body encased his. You embraced his warmth and inhaled the beautiful scent that he was wearing. He both smelt and looked phenomenal.
“Yes bubs.”
“You know I love you right?” Of course you did, but it still made your heart flutter as crazy as the first time he said it to when he tells you now.
“I do.”
“And you know you’re it for me right?”
“Well.. I—” You didn’t want to get too ahead of yourself.
“Because you are.” Harry turned himself around, making you sit up so he could move. He was lying with his head facing upwards now, face looking less red and puffy, and staring right into the souls of your eyes. He looked magical. Beautiful. He thought the same of you. “And,” he moved his fingers to take off his S ring from Gucci, that probably cost more than your annual salary, and place it onto your ring finger of your right hand, “I give you this as a promise to share my last name with you someday.”
Seeing the initial of his last name sat on the finger opposite to the one he claimed he would one day put two more rings on, brought you to tears. “Harry…” You didn’t know what to say, you were speechless. You had never expected for him to do something as monumental as this and had never experienced it before to know how to react.
Of course you’d always dreamt of marrying him and being his for eternity, but never thought of it possibly becoming your reality. Now, Harry was completely devoting himself to you and only you and it suddenly all felt like the dream was settling in place.
“I swear to you Y/N, i’ll love you until the next lifetime and i’ll find you again. I love you so much, I can’t even tell you how much because it is so infinite. You’re so kind and patient with me and you see me for me, not for the Harry Styles, just Harry. I’ll never let a day pass without you on my mind and I think it’s because you were always meant to be mine. My heart is yours.” He smiled once he noticed you were crying, moving one of his hands up to wipe the tears away.
“How do I top that?” You whispered to him, but mostly to yourself. Both of you laughed.
“Just tell me you love me.”
“I do. I do love you Harry.” You nodded and then he sealed your confirmation with a kiss to his lips. You rested your hand upon his cheek, placing the coolness of the S ring upon his cheekbone, as he placed his hand under your chin to guide you into the kiss. He tasted divine and you smiled knowing that you got to have him like this, taste him like this, for the rest of your beating hearts’ days.
#harry styles#harry styles x reader#harry styles fanfic#harry styles x y/n#harry styles fanfiction#finelinevogue#finelinevogue harry styles#harry blurb#harry oneshot#harry styles concept#harry styles fluff#harry styles asthma asthma#ask finelinevogue#ask harry styles#anon response#anon#finelinevogue blurbs#finelinevogue masterlist#harry styles fine line#one night only fine line#fine line album#fine line concert blurb#harry styles concert#harry styles concert blurb
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109 Steps To You
this is a part of the “almost” collaboration hosted by @hyucksie
Pairing: Haechan x Reader Genre: romance, fluff, angst, mature content, soulmate!AU, college!AU Length: 19k Summary: Everyone is born with two marks on their body: one that is identical to your soulmate’s, and one that is identical to the person who will cause you immense pain. No one knows which mark means what until they live out their life and meet the people destined to bring them love and hurt. However, you were only born with one mark. Out of all the places you thought you would meet the person with the mark identical to yours, you never thought it would be on your first day of college. Warnings/Details: female reader, mentions of other nct members (and yuqi from g-idle), explicit sex (unprotected + the consequences that come with it), mentions of a dysfunctional family, swearing
— read epilogue here
a/n: if you’re a minor: beware! there is explicit and mature content in this fic.
“I want to thank you guys, again, for helping me out today.” You shyly announce to the table, swirling your spoon through your froyo and glancing back and forth between the other people sitting before you.
“Oh, it’s no problem, we weren’t doing anything today anyway.” Xiaojun softly knocks his elbow into yours, sending a reassuring smile your way. If it wasn’t for Xiaojun, an old childhood friend, you weren’t sure how moving into your dorm room and getting settled into campus would’ve gone; you would probably still be a mess right now.
“He’s right. Plus, I really wanted to meet the girl Jun kept raving about, he wouldn’t stop talking about how much we would like you-” Mark’s comment is quickly cut off, a thud under the table and a pained look on Mark’s face giving away that Xiaojun just kicked him.
“I just hope I lived up to the hype.” You laugh at their antics.
“Oh, definitely,” Yuqi quickly buts in before Mark can retaliate back at Xiaojun, “And I live a few floors below you, so just let me know if you need anything at all.” She adds on, her warm deposition and all around friendliness from today making you let out a small sigh of relief, some stress falling off your shoulders when you realize just how many people around you are here to help you out.
“I appreciate it so much, really.” You lean away from Xiaojun and Mark, closer to Yuqi and Lucas who are sitting on the other side of the table, “By the way, I love your guys’ marks. They look so good on both of you.”
At your comment, Lucas puts down his phone and gently grabs Yuqi’s hand, their matching chamomile flower marks touching as their fingers intertwine. You almost didn’t notice their matching marks earlier today when they were helping you set up your dorm room, but when you did, you couldn’t help but stop what you were doing and stare at their hands. Such a simple mark has never looked so pretty to you, maybe it’s because Lucas and Yuqi made such a good pair that their fated marks looked so right for them.
“I still wish I got a cool dragon mark down my back, but I’ll let Jun be the one to deal with that in this life.” Lucas smirks at Xiaojun, who just rolls his eyes at Lucas’ fake jealousy. “Yours looks good, too.” He finishes and glances down at your left hand. There, a dragonfly mark stains your skin, the long tail trailing over your thumb and the wings spreading out over the back of your hand and your wrist.
“Thank you.” Your reply is genuine, however you can’t help but remember the solemn fact that surrounds your mark, your voice inadvertently dipping down as your eyes trace over the wings of your dragonfly.
“So, what kind of classes are you taking this semester?” Xiaojun changes the subject, no doubt hearing the lament in your voice.
“Oh, just some required classes. Nothing for my major, really, except Intro to Ethics for my humanities credit.” You reply as casually as you can to bring the mood at the table back up, but your comment makes Yuqi gasp and all four pairs of eyes at the table turn to you. You slouch in your seat at their sudden attention on you.
“Why would you do that to yourself?”
“What is wrong with you?”
“Do you know your advisor's email? Let’s send them a message right now to get you out-”
“Stop.” You shake your head, laughing a bit at the overreaction from your new friends, “What’s wrong with Ethics?”
“It’s in the Hauss building.” Xiaojun says as if you should already know what that means. You roll your lips in and shake your head; you do not know what that means at all.
“It’s the building all the way on top of the big hill on the west side of campus, by the auditorium.” Xiaojun explains more.
“They only teach three classes over there: Ethics and Music Theory 3 and 4.” Mark sets down his melted froyo, not realizing he has some sticking to his upper lip.
“I’m failing to see what’s so horrible about that?”
“When Xiaojun says it’s a big hill, he means it’s a really big hill-”
“Didn’t someone count the steps once and it came out to be, like, close to 100?” Lucas asks, one hand still tangled with Yuqi’s and the other now rapidly slurping his triple chocolate froyo.
“That was me, and it’s 109 steps.” Mark shutters, “I took Music Theory 3 last year and I ended up skipping half of the time because I couldn’t find the energy to climb up and down those steps three times a week.”
“Why 109? Aren’t groups of steps usually in even numbers? That’s not very architecturally smart.” Yuqi purses her lips and her eyebrows screw together.
“Screw architecture. Are you telling me I’ll have to climb up and down 109 stairs three times a week just to go to Ethics?” You can already feel a headache growing at the back of your head when you think about the complications of dealing with this big staircase. You needed that class for your major, and you thought it was going to be a class that you could pass with flying colors, but it seems like it might just be a nuisance to you more than an easy A.
“Talk to your advisor. Try to drop out and take a different class. Trust me, 109 steps don’t seem like much until you actually have to climb them.” Mark gives you his piece of advice, sticking his spoon filled with froyo into his mouth and then immediately scrunching his eyes and mumbling about brain freeze.
You’ll have to send an e-mail to your advisor real quick, but for your first day of classes tomorrow, you’ll just have to deal with those 109 steps.
The walk to your ethics class the next morning is very calming, the university’s nice landscaping and the warm weather calming your nerves down for your first day of classes. When you round the corner of the stonewall you had been following, you’re met with the infamous set of steps.
You have to crane your neck to look up at the top of the staircase, your jaw slightly dropping at how steep of a hill the stairs were built on. There are other students around you walking up and down the staircase, their headphones shoved in their ears and their heads down as they make the climb to and from class.
The stonewall you had been following all the way here continues up the staircase on your right and on the left is a thick wall of trees, their branches hanging over the stairs and giving protection from the sunlight to the students below. You begin to count every step on your way up; four regular steps, the fifth one a bit longer than the rest, and then repeat. It’s not that you don’t trust Mark’s words when he said there’s 109 steps, you just want to count for yourself.
You hear some rowdy boys coming down the stairs, but the noise is not enough to pull your head up from the ground or to stop you from counting, until you’re forcefully pushed into the stone wall on your right. Breathing in through your teeth sharply, your left hand clutches your collarbones where the pain is the worst.
“Oh, my god. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to push you.” The guy laughs through his words, a high-pitched and almost squeaky laugh, making him sound not as sincere as he probably meant to be. When you turn to face him, the first thing you notice are his eyes. Chocolate colored and almond shaped, some laugh lines showing from the remnants of his shenanigans with his friends.
Looking back, you realize you fell in love with his eyes first. How they don’t hold back from showing any emotion, and the mischievousness they hold no matter what.
Even when his smile falls, his face looks pretty; long hair hanging down over his forehead and ears, and plump lips spreading into an ‘o’ shape as he looks at your dragonfly. Every line and detail is just the same as his own, as if fate spent a little more time with you two to make sure you know you’re each other’s soulmate the moment you meet.
“Your mark…” The man points at your hand, and that’s when you realize who you’ve just met. His brilliant eyes fill with excitement and he starts to breath harder, taking a step back from sheer surprise that you’re here. His soulmate. His one and only for the rest of this life.
However it all fades away the moment you drop your hand from your collarbones, stepping past him to continue up the staircase.
“Next time, watch where you’re going.” The first words you ever say to him are filled with so much indifference that Haechan can only follow your back with his eyes, his jaw slack and his hand still reaching out for you.
“Hey, wait-” Haechan is about to run after you, but he’s held back by Renjun, his best friend and the one who pushed Haechan into you in the first place.
“Was that-” Renjun begins, holding onto his friend’s elbow as he also watches you walk up the rest of the 109 steps.
“Yeah… Why did she ignore me like that? She saw that I have the same mark. We’re soulmates!” Haechan almost cries out in confusion, his heart and mind in a mess. Can you blame him? He’s been waiting to meet his soulmate since he knew what the dragonfly on his hand meant. Haechan has never been a patient person, and even waiting several years for you to come to him was testing him. Now that you’re here, he isn’t going to let you go easily.
As Haechan begins to walk back up the staircase to follow you, not caring about his Literature class in 15 minutes, Renjun’s grip on him tightens and pulls him back.
“You can’t just go harass her about this.”
“I’m not going to harass her. I just want to talk.” Haechan tries to pull out of Renjun’s grip again, but the little man has the sturdiness of a boulder and pulls his friend back.
“Maybe she doesn’t want a soulmate?” Renjun and Haechan stop their tug of war at Jaemin’s words. He had been leaning against the handrail by the trees the whole time while watching the scene unfold in front of him, his arms crossed over his chest and his baseball cap covering his eyes. “It’s not that uncommon these days.”
Haechan and Renjun let go of each other at their friend’s words. Jaemin sends them a bitter smile and all three of them recall the incident that happened last year when Jaemin met his own soulmate:
A rejection.
Jaemin took it hard; if it hadn’t been for his best friends, he doesn’t know where he would be in life right now. Jaemin can’t help but let the memories surface as he continues to walk down the stairs, slower than before, his head bowed and his hands shoved into his pant pockets. Renjun sends Haechan a look that tells him to not push the situation further, following Jaemin down the stairs.
Haechan sends your retreating figure one last look, watching you reach the top of the staircase and walk into the Hauss building. He retreats and follows his friends dejectedly, the promise of you showing up on this staircase at the same time on Wednesday being the only thing that lets his legs follow his friends down the stairs.
“Hey, ___, come in.” Mark smiles brightly when he recognizes you at the door, stepping aside to let you into the dorm room. “Xiaojun is in the shower still… Will you be okay by yourself if I leave?” He looks unsure as you set your backpack down on Xiaojun’s desk chair.
“Oh, I’ll be fine. You do whatever you need to.” You state and then plop down onto your friend’s bed. You hear Mark laugh and say something about how all the first years look tired at the end of their first day and then leaves the room, shutting the door behind him. You lay sprawled out on the bed, the only sounds surrounding you is the water from the shower and the ticking of the analog clock on the wall.
Even though the whole ordeal happened several hours ago, you haven’t been able to get the moment you met your soulmate out of your mind. It was almost impossible for you to turn around and walk away. Even now, your feet still itch to go back to that staircase and find the sweet looking guy who you no doubt left confused.
However, you can’t do that— you won’t let yourself do that. And that’s partially why you’re in Xiaojun’s dorm room after your last class today: so that he can knock some sense into you.
The shower turns off and a few moments later, the bathroom door opens and Xiaojun steps out. He has a towel wrapped around his waist and a smaller one on his shoulders to catch the droplets from his hair; when he sees you laying on his bed, he jumps in fright.
“Good, God,” He sighs and clutches his bare chest with one hand, the other protectively going to the towel around his waist. “Can you say something the next time you come over? I almost had a heart attack because of you.” He walks over to his closet on the other side of the room, rummaging through some clothes as you sit up.
“Sorry, I thought you heard the door open…” You trail off, getting distracted by Xiaojun’s mark. The dragon on his back is huge, taking up most of the area and spreading to his shoulders and upper arms, too. However, that’s not the mark that caught your attention. Right on his ankle sits a three-leaf clover, so small and such a stark difference from the monster drawn on his back.
You’re pulled away from your thoughts when Xiaojun turns around and walks back into the bathroom, this time leaving the door open, “So, how was your first day?”
“Oh, well, it was okay…” You trail off, speaking a bit louder so that he could hear you from the other room. You stand up and start pacing in the space between Mark’s and Xiaojun’s beds, a nervous habit of yours.
“But? I know there’s a ‘but’ somewhere.” Xiaojun replies.
“Well, something happened…” You trail off, not sure how to make the words leave your mouth yet.
“What is it?” You swallow at the question, your throat dry and hands clammy. You must’ve been taking a long time to answer because Xiaojun walks out of the bathroom, now fully clothed, and stares at your pacing form. “What’s wrong, ___.”
“I met him.” You say simply, hoping Xiaojun gets what you mean, but he doesn’t. You sigh and sink down to the floor slowly, catching yourself on Xiaojun’s bed. The action makes his eyes widen in fear and he crosses the room in a few short strides, kneeling down next to you and searching your eyes for the answer.
“What? What is it?”
“The person with the same mark as me. I met him.”
“... Oh.”
Xiaojun slowly slides down onto his butt in front of you, folding his legs. He’s not sure what to say, or how to comfort you in anyway. He didn’t expect to be the only person around that you trust when something like this happens. He sees the lost look in your eyes and slides towards you to pull you into a hug.
Unlike Xiaojun, and most people in the world, you do not have two marks.
Xiaojun’s dragon and clover match with two different people in this world; one who will be his soulmate and the other who will bring him immense pain. Everyone has two marks— except you; it even states it on your birth certificate, your parents can testify that they’ve never seen a second mark on you, just the lonely dragonfly that spreads its wings over your left hand.
When you were younger, you were curious about what it meant to only have one mark. The people around you always had two marks, the people on the TV shows you liked to watch always had two marks, even anatomy books have depictions of humans with two marks. Why were you different? What did it mean?
After gathering up the guts to type the question into the Google search engine, you found your answers, and it changed your thoughts on your one and only mark forever. The people in the world who only had one mark testified to the same story online: the person who’s mark matched theirs were both their soulmate and the person who hurt them the most.
After learning about that, you promised yourself that if you ever met the person with the same mark as you, you would not meddle with them in any way if they were only destined to bring you pain in the end.
If you knew jumping off a bridge would definitely kill you, you wouldn’t jump, right?
Xiaojun is the only person, other than your parents, who knows about the situation. Which is why when he hugs you, you lean into him and accept his comfort.
“Tell me what you’re thinking about. You must have so many questions.” He mumbles into your hair.
“Not questions. I’m just curious about what I am to him.” You reply, whispering into Xiaojun’s shoulder.
“About what you are to him?”
“I know he’ll be the person I’m meant to love the most, and also the person who will hurt me the most. But am I the one that’s supposed to love him or the one that’s supposed to hurt him?”
“Lots of people say that they can feel it when they meet. Like Lucas, he said he instantly knew Yuqi was supposed to be his soulmate.” Xiaojun thinks back to all the people who have told him the exact same thing, even his parents.
“The guy… he kept calling me his soulmate. He sounded so sure about it, too.” You lean away from Xiaojun to look into his big and curious eyes.
“What about you? What did you feel?” He asks.
“It felt… like I left a part of myself with him.” Xiaojun’s eyes widened at that, “Is that crazy? I was only around him for a minute, maybe less, and I can’t stop thinking about how I never wanted to leave. It was so hard to walk away from him..” You trail off, feeling tears suddenly gather at the edges of your eyes.
“Xiaojun…” The edge in your voice makes him grab a hold on your hands, “I don’t want him to hurt me. I’m not ready for it.”
“Hey, hey…” Xiaojun squeezes your hands before gently guiding your face to his, meeting his eyes with your own, “He’ll hurt you eventually, yeah, but he’ll also be the person who is supposed to love you unconditionally. The person who is going to know you so well, better than yourself. Maybe you should see where he takes you in life? Destiny still wanted you to meet each other no matter what the end game is going to be… Are you really going to tell fate to fuck off?”
“Can’t I?” Your response makes Xiaojun laugh, which he apologises for laughing in a serious situation right after, but the mood is already broken and you laugh at yourself a bit as well.
“C’mon, let’s order something to eat and get your mind off of this, even if it’s just for a few hours.” Xiaojun pulls you off of the floor and reaches for his phone, trying to find the phone number to his favorite delivery place.
You sit on his bed once again, your hands limp in your lap and so much appreciation for Xiaojun in your chest. You probably would’ve gone insane if he wasn’t here for you. His suggestion on giving the guy you met today a chance plays like a record in your head, but the record scratches when you remember the promise you made to yourself a long time ago.
Don’t mess with him. He will only bring you pain in the end.
On Wednesday, Haechan is the first one out of his seat in his Music Theory 3 class, not even waiting for the slow Renjun and even slower Jaemin before sprinting out of the classroom and outside, waiting at the top of the staircase for your figure to appear at the bottom.
Students float up and down the stairs, but he doesn’t see you anywhere amongst them. Eventually, Renjun and Jaemin catch up to him, standing behind him and also staring down the long staircase.
“C’mon, Haechan, we need to go to our next class.” Renjun is the first one to step down, followed by Jaemin. Haechan takes a good look at everyone’s faces on his way down, getting some weird looks sent his way for staring, but he doesn’t care.
“Haechan.” Jaemin suddenly calls out, making his friend turn suddenly to look at him. Jaemin only nods his head to the bottom of the stairs where you just turned the corner. Despite his hurry from before, Haechan stops at the sight of you. His usual confidence is lost when he sees you climb the stairs. Now, he’s not sure if he should approach you.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Renjun nudges Haechan, but the younger only turns around to look at his friend.
“I don’t know what to say to her. What do I say to make her see I’m her soulmate?” Haechan asks, helplessness seeping into his words.
Renjun rolls his eyes; whenever his best friend needs to be the usual confident man he is, that’s when the confidence is most likely to drain out of him. Renjun shakes Haechan’s shoulders with a tight grip on his jacket, making some more people send the two of them some weird looks.
“She’s your soulmate, right? Fate already gave you everything you need to know about how to talk to her.” Renjun then pushes his friend towards your direction, “But for the love of god, don’t harass her.” Renjun ends with a pointed look and continues walking with Jaemin down the stairs.
Haechan slowly makes his way to you, crossing over to the middle of the staircase and stopping you in your tracks. You look up to inspect who it is that just stopped in front of you, and your surprise fades when you realize it’s the same guy from Monday.
“Hi.” He says simply. You only nod your head, lips pursed, and then move around him to continue walking to class.
“Wait…” Haechan calls after you, but you don’t stop this time. So Haechan keeps walking after you, only one step behind, “I’m not sure if you’re aware, but you’re my soulmate. I’ve been waiting for you for so long—” You sharply turn to face him, making Haechan cut off and tilt his head up to look at you.
“How do you know I’m your soulmate? What if I’m not?” You ask. Haechan shakes his head softly at that, his golden hair moving over his sun-kissed skin as he does.
“That’s not possible.”
“How do you know?” You ask. Haechan loves how curiosity burns in your eyes. He takes longer than normal to speak only so that he can look over your features and memorize them to the best of his ability. Last night, he tried to recall your face but the image came out so blurry since he only saw you for a moment on Monday. He wants to clearly remember what you look like.
“How about I take you somewhere, and then I’ll tell you?” The proposition stuns you, and your burning curiosity makes you want to say yes. However, going anywhere with him would be breaking your promise to yourself, so you decide to forget it.
“Nevermind…” You mumble, turning around to walk up the stairs again.
“You seem like you really want to know how I’m sure we’re soulmates… Aren’t you curious?” Haechan asks, making you stop in your tracks again. This man has only known you for a day, only talked to you for a few moments, yet he already knows how to get you to do something. “I promise I won’t hurt you, and I’m not lying either.”
You take a moment to think about the proposition. You’re really curious about how he’s so sure that you’re soulmates. Sure, you know you’re soulmates, but why is he so sure you aren’t the person who’s supposed to hurt him? You consider taking up the offer, but can you stay strong to your own promise while being close to him?
Curiosity wins, and you turn back around to face him, nodding and making him smile widely. There’s that crinkle in his eyes again, that sparkle against the sun that makes saying yes to him so much more worth it.
“My friends call me Haechan, but you can call me Donghyuck. That’s my real name.” He sticks out his hand for you to shake. You once heard that physical touch brings soulmates together quicker; you’re not sure if that’s true, but you don’t want to test it.
“I’m ___.” You nod at him and grip onto your backpack straps instead of accepting his handshake.
“Haechan, hurry up or we’ll be late!” You both hear Renjun shout out from the bottom of the stairs, “And on our second day, too.” You hear him groan.
“Okay, ___, I’ll see you here at 7pm tomorrow night.” Haechan turns around to run back to his friends, sending you one last wave goodbye and almost tripping down the stairs as he does.
You take a deep breath and turn around to walk up the rest of the steps. You’re unsure if you did the right thing by agreeing to see him tomorrow night, but the deed is now done, and you can only wait for Donghyuck to quench your curiosity.
As promised, you meet Donghyuck at 7 o’clock sharp the next day. He’s already waiting for you at the bottom of the stairs.
“So, where are you taking me?” You ask after saying your hello’s.
“It’s a surprise.” He smiles and nods his head to make you follow him. He leads you through parts of campus you haven’t seen yet, the buildings looking older and older the further down the path you walk. Soon, Donghyuck takes a sharp turn into what looks like the middle of the forest but is really just a small, hidden extension of the trail.
Under a canopy of tall trees that wave with the wind to you and Donghyuck, there is a skinny trail that leads to glimmering water. It draws you in, your curiosity struck and your feet now moving on their own accord. Bushes tickle your ankles and the smell of some sort of flower you cannot identify floods your senses, but you can only keep walking towards the sparkling water.
The scene in front of you takes your breath away, a crisp gasp that you have no control over leaves your lips. The pond before you is big, stretching further than what you can see. The water is blue and the setting sun’s light reflects off of it to create rippling sparkles. There are some lily pads floating around, their flowers gone due to the temperature dropping recently.
You didn’t even notice that you stopped walking, your eyes wide as you take in the scenery before you. You almost forget who you’re with and why you came, but Donghyuck doesn’t let that happen. You snap out of it when he continues to walk along the trail that leads around the pond. You walk alongside Donghyuck, a few feet away with your hands awkwardly tucked into your pockets.
“C’mon, let’s sit.” He motions to a weeping willow tree. It’s tall and the branches sway pleasantly in the wind, completely unaware and indifferent to the years of history in the area. Underneath the tree is a sturdy bench, you sit on the left side while Donghyuck sits on the right side. Then, you both take a few moments to stare at the mesmerizing water that led you all the way to this seemingly magical place.
“Why did you bring me here?” You ask after a bit.
“Do you not like it?” Donghyuck asks back.
“No.” You quickly reply, looking over his side profile before turning back to the water, “I’m just curious.”
“Something in me knew you would like this place, that’s all.” Donghyuck replies while trying to hide his proud smile, looking down at the grass. “You’re curious about a lot of things, huh?”
“Yeah, I can’t help it. There’s just so much I want to know.” It’s easy to talk to him, a bit too easy. You have to keep reminding yourself that you’re supposed to have your guard up in front of him, but it’s proving harder than you thought it would be.
“Like how I’m sure that you’re my soulmate and not the person who is supposed to hurt me?” Donghyuck leans his weight away from you, his eyebrow cocked in a question. You nod your head lightly, playing with your hands on your lap.
“It’s because I’ve already met the person who’s supposed to bring me pain. I’ve already been hurt.” At his words, surprise fills you up and you turn your head to look him straight in the eye.
For some reason, you always thought that when people meet the person who brings them the largest amount of pain to their life, they couldn’t be the same ever again. How does one get hurt so badly, and still live on?
There are so many ways to hurt someone. Some people become bankrupt, some people lose all of their belongings, some people are even physically hurt by the person who has the same mark as them. How does a person go through any of that and still be themselves afterwards? More importantly, how did Donghyuck go through immense pain and still be able to smile at you like he is right here, right now?
“Here.” He begins to explain, pushing his pants around until you can see his second mark through one of the holes in his jeans, a sunflower on his knee, “My dad had the same mark as me.”
“Your…. Dad?” You ask, still confused.
“Mhmm,” He nods, now tracing the petals of the sunflower mark absentmindedly, “My parents immediately knew something was wrong when I was born. Why would a son and dad have the same mark? When I was growing up, he worked a lot, so I spent lots of time with my mom and grew closer to her. I don’t remember much from that time, but I do remember we were happy. We didn’t have a lot, but we had each other; that kind of feeling.” He looks over at you to see if you’re keeping up with the story. To Donghyuck’s surprise, you already have tears lining your eyes.
“Then one day, Dad comes home and tells us he lost his job. I remember my parents fought a lot the few weeks after that happened, mostly about how to raise me if they had no income. Dad would go out and look for work, but always came back with no luck. So eventually, my mom started working. For a while, the reason we could keep living was because of her.” Donghyuck swallows and pauses for a moment before continuing.
“And then one night, dad came home and told us he gambled. Everything, he gambled everything away. Even the little that we had, it wasn’t ours anymore. That night, my dad told me I was a mistake. My parents never meant to have me, and he said…” Donghyuck purses his lips for a moment. It had been a while since he thought about this. The scar on his heart still hurts when he picks at it. “... He said that he wished I had never been born. Then, we wouldn’t have been in that mess.”
“How old were you?” You speak up after a moment.
“Seven? Or eight.” He nods and sniffs his nose, looking down at his knee. The whole day, Donghyuck was preparing himself to tell you this story. He felt that the only way to get close to you was to open up like this first, to show you that he isn’t someone scary or bad. To Donghyuck’s surprise, telling this story hurts less now than it did earlier in this life. Maybe that means time is working, and his heart is being mended bit by bit.
Donghyuck leans his elbows against his knees, looking at the water once again while waiting for you to say anything. Are you still curious? What do you think of him now?
He was in no way prepared to feel your arms wrap around his waist in a hug, your head resting against his shoulder and your chest pressed against his side. He freezes for a moment, and then melts into your embrace completely. He’s overcome with lovesick softness for you, lightly griping the part of your arm that’s across his chest as his head turns to the side to press a kiss to the top of your head. It’s so quick that you don’t even have time to move away or to react. You just let it happen, as it’s supposed to be.
“You said that something in you knew I would like this place,” You mumble against him. He hears your voice straining with emotion, “Well, something in me knows that you need this right now.”
You and Donghyuck sit there until the sparkling water is no longer fueled by the sun’s light, but by the moon’s. It seems as though now you’ve touched Donghyuck, you never wanted to stop. You’re almost one hundred percent sure that it’s because of the soulmate bond, and a part of you nags at yourself for already chipping away at the promise you made to yourself when you were younger.
However, younger you never knew what it would be like to have a person sit in front of you and share a part of his past with you in an act of confidence and security. Your younger self never knew what it would be like to feel the same pain as someone else, and the pull you felt to touch him after sensing that physical affection would help ease that pain away.
Your younger self had no idea it was this easy to fall into a person, especially when you know they’ll catch you.
“God, I’m so sick and tired of Accounting. ___, I’m quitting school.” Xiaojun gravely tells you, his eyes not wavering from his computer screen.
“Shut up and do your homework, Jun.” You mumble, your eyes not leaving your own computer screen as you type up your Ethics essay. Three weeks into school and you’re already fully emerged in your classes. The newness of college has faded and now it’s time to start the next four years of studying endlessly for the future.
“Are you guys… okay? You haven’t moved over there in a few hours.” Mark asks from the other side of the room where he’s doing his own homework. He eyes you and your best friend from where you’re sitting on his bed, “Are you even comfortable?”
You and Xiaojun are sharing a blanket, he’s leaning against his headboard and you’re leaning against the wall. Your legs are thrown over his and several textbooks are scattered over the blanket. You’re not even sure which of these books are yours or his, or which papers laying in messy stacks belong to who.
“Yeah, I think we’re okay. We’ve been studying like this since high school.” Xiaojun answers, his fingers moving along his keyboard at the same time. You nod at Mark and he shakes his head, not understanding you two but accepting the answer.
You’re over at the guys’ dorm room enough that Mark is not surprised to see you here anymore, hanging out with Xiaojun or waiting for him to come back from class. It’s not that you don’t like your own dorm room, but it’s always so quiet in there since your roommate always studies at the library. You only hear her come into the room late at night when you’re on the verge of sleep, and when she leaves early in the morning before your alarm rings. Weekends are the same. You don’t really care, but you’ve started to hate the quiet, so you’re glad that Mark and Xiaojun don’t mind you chilling here.
“Argh,” Mark yawns and stretches after a few minutes, throwing his computer to the side and standing up, “I’m getting some snacks from the vending machine. You guys want anything?”
After you and Xiaojun answer with simultaneous shakes of your heads, which creeps Mark out, he leaves the room to get food. The room is silent for a few more moments until Xiaojun angles the lid of his laptop down to look at you.
“So… How’s the guy?”
“What guy?” You ask, still preoccupied with your essay.
“Your soulmate, ___, what other guy is there?” Xiaojun answers exasperatedly, “You never told me his name, so I don’t know what to call him. Actually, I haven’t heard you talk about him since the first day of classes. I was hoping you’d tell me what happened with him, but I guess I have to go digging up your dirt myself.” He rolls his eyes.
“His name is Haechan.” You answer, moving your computer to the side, “And I haven’t said anything to you about him because… I haven’t seen him in weeks.” You admit quietly.
“Huh? Didn’t you say you were meeting up so he could tell you why he’s sure you’re his soulmate?” You nod your head at the question, “So, what happened after that?”
“Well… I kinda, maybe, sort of…. have been avoiding him.” You answer quietly, stealing a glance at your best friend to see him staring at you blankly. When he sighs and reaches for his pillow, your eyes widen and you hold up your hands in front of you, spewing pleas and ‘wait’s. Xiaojun doesn’t care, though, flinging his pillow from behind him and into your face.
“Ow?” You whine after the pillow makes contact with your head and forces you to turn to face the other way, “Was that necessary?” You rub your nose, the part of your face that hurts worse from his attack. You’re used to Xiaojun doing this to you whenever you did something that both of you know you shouldn’t have so that you can “get some sense knocked into you, hopefully.”
“You’re so dumb. So, so dumb. Why would you avoid him.” It’s not a question, more of a confused statement to the general air. “You realize people would kill to meet their soulmate, right? People would do anything to be in your position, but you just hide away?”
“People would do anything to meet their soulmate, but people would also do anything to stay away from the person who shares their other mark.” You retaliate, “You don’t understand. To me, Haechan is both of those people.”
“There you go again, worrying about the future when you’re not even sure about what is going to happen. When will you stop worrying about something you can’t control and start thinking about today?” Xiaojun sounds so tired talking about this topic, a conversation you’ve had many times in your friendship. You wonder if he’s so tired of it, why he keeps bringing it up himself.
Before you can answer, the door to the room opens and Mark walks in, several snacks in his arms, “Hey, everyone, I hope it’s okay I brought a friend. He’s in the same major as me, just a year younger—”
“___?” Mark stops talking when his friend speaks, surprised that he already knows one of the people in the room. Your eyes widen, jaw slackening as you’re unable to even let out a peep from your mouth.
“You know each other?” Mark asks, looking between his two friends.
“Yeah, you could say I know my soulmate.” Donghyuck replies, making both Xiaojun and Mark’s eyes widen. You suddenly realize the situation you’re in: under a blanket with Xiaojun, your pajamas on, and your soulmate in front of you after you ghosted him for weeks. For the first time in a while, your eyes meet.
Donghyuck is mad. You can tell by how his fists are clenched and his jaw is tightened. Slowly getting out of the bed, you try to form some words, but Donghyuck snaps and walks over to you quickly. Grabbing your hand, he pulls you out of the room and down the hallway until you get to the lounge area. When you reach the empty room, that’s when you come to your senses.
“Donghyuck,” You pull your arm out of his, making him turn to face you, “I’m not even wearing shoes.” You hiss, pointing down to your feet as if to prove some point.
“What was all that?” He disregards your comment and hisses back at you, stepping closer so that you’re barely a few inches apart. “You were under a blanket. With some guy. Don’t you feel wrong doing that?” He asks, his hands now on his hips. You feel slightly like you’re being lectured to.
“That guy is my best friend.” You spit out.
“So, do you go around and do that to all of your guy friends?” Donghyuck chuckles vehemently, you can tell he’s angry and jealous, and that those emotions are clouding his brain at the moment. That doesn’t mean his words don’t hurt, though.
“Xiaojun and I have been best friends since we were in diapers. I’ve known you for three weeks, barely. I’m more comfortable around him than I am with you. You think just because I’m your soulmate, I’ll automatically trust you and we’ll all of a sudden be a happy couple? It doesn’t work like that, Donghyuck. I don’t even know you.” You can tell you hurt him by your last words because he turns silent, his shoulders slouching and his anger subsiding.
You can tell you hurt him, hard, because you feel the hurt, too.
It makes you realize how scary the bond between soulmates is. Even though you and Donghyuck haven’t spent that much time together to strengthen your bond, it’s still strong enough to allow you to feel his emotions. It makes you wonder if Donghyuck will be able to feel your pain in the future when he hurts you, like he’s destined to.
“Have you even tried to get to know me? You’ve been avoiding me ever since I took you to the pond.” At his comment, you fold your arms over your chest and look away, not ready to answer that question.
“I’m… just scared, is all.” You manage to reply. Although not the complete truth, it’s not a total lie. Donghyuck completely softens at your words, his close proximity to you feels less threatening and turns into something more gentle. His hand softly slips into yours, but this time with a lighter touch than before.
“You don’t have to be scared, not around me. I’m new to this too, so I don’t know how it all works yet, but this is something we can figure out together. That’s what we were fated to do.” Donghyuck can feel his words pulling you closer to him, he can feel you on the edge and he’s ready to catch you with his arms wide open.
But in the last second, you take a step back and slip your hand out of his, making his drop limply to his sides. You send him a look, something he can’t read, and then turn around and walk back to the dorm he pulled you out of.
He almost had you, almost.
When midterms come around, you use your upcoming tests and projects as a way to dive deep into your work so that you don’t have to think about Donghyuck. It’s a good plan overall, however your friends quickly start worrying for you and your health. Staying up late several nights in a row and not even being able to remember when the last time you ate is where Xiaojun pulled the plug on your bad studying habits. He confiscated your backpack and dropped you off in front of your dorm building with the promise that you’ll have all of your things back tomorrow morning only if you rest for tonight.
On your way to the elevator, you run into Yuqi, both of your facial expressions brightening when you recognize each other.
“Oh, ___, Hi!” You stop in the middle of the hallway to greet her, a smile pulling at your lips due to her bright hello. “How are you?”
“Midterms are kicking my ass, but other than that I’m fine.” She laughs at your answer, throwing her head back and letting her new short hair ruffle her shoulders.
“I wish I could tell you it gets better, but that would be a lie.” You nod your head in solemn understanding, “Listen, I can’t talk for long since I have a night class, but promise to text me when things slow down, yeah?”
“Of course, I promise.” You nod, just the thought of spending some time with a good friend already pushes away your stress. You wave bye to Yuqi as she begins to turn around but after a loud “oh!” leaves her lips, she turns back to face you.
“Your roommate, her name is Mya, right?” At her random question, you tilt your head in confusion, “She has really long, black hair and big glasses, right? I think I saw her when I was helping you move in?”
“Yeah, that’s her.” You nod, “Why?”
“She found her soulmate today.” You would’ve been more interested in the news if you knew Mya beyond when she goes to class and when she gets back to the dorm, but you feign surprise and nod your head absentmindedly.
“Lucas managed to get a video. It was a whole performance in the quad today, you’d think someone was getting married. I’ll send it to you later.” And with that, she says her last goodbye and runs off. You slowly turn and continue walking in a slow pace up to your dorm room, taking the stairs just so you can have some time to think and be away from people you could potentially run into if you use the elevator.
You’re genuinely happy for Mya, even if you barely know a single thing about her. However, something about a person close to you finding their soulmate makes you sad, considering the situation with your own soulmate. You can’t help but feel a little jealous that there are people who can meet their soulmate and fall into each other’s lives easily.
In times like these, you crave for Donghyuck.
You crave his touch and his words, you crave that comfortable feeling of belonging somewhere you get when he’s around. It’s insane that you haven’t spent much time together, yet you can yearn for someone to the extent that it hurts. It’s been like this ever since Donghyuck pulled you out of Xiaojun’s dorm and you rejected him.
Turning away from him all those weeks ago still haunts you. When you’re struggling to fall asleep, your mind goes to that night. When you let your mind wander, it wanders to that night. You constantly think about stepping away from him, but you’re not sure if you keep remembering the moment out of guilt or shame. One of the questions you keep asking yourself is if you did the right thing. You still do not have an answer.
When you walk into your dorm room, you kick off your shoes and turn on your bedside lamp, falling onto your bed with a deep sigh. You close your eyes for a second, but the peace and quiet of your room is ruined when your phone dings with a notification.
Yuqi’s message pops up, and when you swipe your phone open you can see she sent a video. You click on it and turn the volume up. This was no doubt taken earlier today in the quad, the sun shining and lots of professors and students walking in the background. Under the huge clock tower stand two people, one of them holding a large bouquet of roses. When the clock strikes noon, the bells on top of the tower begin to ring a familiar melody that can be heard all over your big campus. You see the exchange of the bouquet and the two people hug, and then applause rises from the people walking by. You smile when you hear Lucas’ whooping and hollering from behind the phone.
You’ve heard about the tradition of soulmates meeting under the clock tower at your university. Yuqi told you about it when she was giving you a tour around campus at the beginning of the semester. You remember her telling you that it’s really romantic, probably due to the history of so many people getting together in the exact same spot.
Although the idea is rather plain, you do feel your heart strings tug at the beautiful display, glad you could see something like this through a video. Then, as the camera gets closer to the couple, your smile fades and you pause the video, zooming in to get a better view. Mya is no doubt the one who received the flowers, but you can’t help but furrow your eyebrows as you recognize her soulmate.
It’s one of Donghyuck’s friends.
Not the quiet one with black hair that hangs around on the outside of their group, but the shorter one who seemed to simultaneously love and hate Donghyuck, or at least that’s what you gathered from seeing him a few times.
After the realization, you drop your phone to the side and stare up at your ceiling in defeat. Is this fate? If you didn’t meet Donghyuck on those steps two months ago, would you eventually meet him through your roommate and her soulmate? Or is this all just one big coincidence?
In this world, coincidences are harder to find than the work of fate.
Your train of thought is quickly cut off by the opening on the door, you quickly sit up to watch a huge red bouquet of flowers enter the room, followed by your roommate. You’ve only seen her face a few times this semester, but never have her features looked so bright and happy. She also looks startled when she notices you’re in the room, but her happiness doesn’t fade.
“Oh? You’re here?” She asks.
“I could ask you the same thing.” You both chuckle awkwardly, “Congrats, by the way. For finding your soulmate.” You motion to the flowers in her hand.
“Thank you! To be honest, Renjun wasn’t at all what I expected in a soulmate, but I think I love him already.” The sweetness drips from her eyes and words, and you nod and smile, remembering that Donghyuck’s friend’s name is Renjun. Her phone begins to ring and she shuffles the flowers in her hand to look at the screen, “Oh, it’s him.”
She answers the call, speaking quietly as she walks over to her side of the room. You weigh out the options of sneaking out of your dorm and finding a place to chill until your roommate falls asleep. You're not sure if you can talk to her about soulmate stuff and keep up this happy look on your face.
However, all thoughts of those plans leave your mind when Mya turns to you and holds out the phone, “It’s for you?” She says it more like a question, but you’re sure you’re the one who’s more confused.
“Hello?” You ask into the phone, awkwardly looking around the room.
“___? Oh, thank god. It’s Renjun, Haechan’s friend. I need your help.” He talks quickly and shallowly, like he’s out of breath and currently moving somewhere.
“How did you know I’m Mya’s roommate?” You ask, disregarding his cry for help.
“It’s a long story, I promise I’ll explain later, but can you please come to the auditorium? The back entrance.” You hear more voices in the background of the call, but you can’t make out what they're saying. One of them is definitely Donghyuck.
“What’s going on?” At the sound of your soulmate’s unique tenor, you suddenly become more aware of what might be happening. Is Donghyuck safe? Did he get in trouble?
“Donghyuck drank too much and he won’t go home, he keeps asking for you.” At that, you hand the phone back to Mya, who takes it from you with an unsure look. By the time Mya says her worried goodbyes and hangs up, she turns back to an empty dorm room, your phone snatched from your bed and your scattered shoes gone.
You must’ve made it to the auditorium in record time, not even the climb up the 109 steps could slow you down. When you reach the auditorium, you can hear Donghyuck and his friends conversing loudly and you follow their voices, which eventually leads you to the dingy backside of the auditorium. Donghyuck is sitting on the ground with the hood of his coat pulled up and covering his eye sight, arms crossed over his chest and his lips in a pout. His two friends, Renjun and the black-haired kid, stand above him. The quiet one is shivering in his spot while Renjun practically yells at Donghyuck on the ground, who doesn’t seem to be moving any time soon.
“Hi, ___.” The quiet one notices you first and then all three guys turn to look at you.
“___…” Donghyuck whines out your name and tries to stand up but Renjun gently pushes him back down.
“What happened?” You ask, sniffing your nose when the harsh, cold air nips at it.
“He said he wanted to unwind before his midterms tomorrow but then he went out and had some drinks, a few too many as you can see.” Renjun explains, “We followed him here, he said he won’t go anywhere unless it’s with you.”
“It’s strange. Haechan is a good drinker, I didn’t think he would get drunk so quickly… Oh, I’m Jaemin, by the way.” He introduces himself with a bright smile, as if you weren’t just discussing the drunken state of his friend.
“I’m Renjun, I called you earlier. I promise I have a good explanation for how I know you’re Mya’s roommate, I just don’t think right now is the best time to talk about it.” Renjun explains, his hands pointing towards Donghyuck.
“Right, about him… I think you guys should leave.” Both sober men widen their eyes, looking at each other and then back at you.
“Are you sure you want to handle this yourself? He looks small, but Haechan is kind of heavy.” Jaemin warns.
“Hey!” Donghyuck speaks up, but even his verbalization sounds slurred. When he points an accusing finger at Jaemin, he sways and misses Jaemin’s figure by a whole foot, “Don’t say that kind of stuff to my girlfriend.”
At his use of the word, Jaemin and Renjun stand straight with awkwardness and you sigh, white puffs of air leaving your mouth, “Yeah, you guys should go.”
Renjun and Jaemin give you an unsure look, but turn around and leave the area anyway. Renjun sends one last look over his shoulder with a wave of his hand. You look at Donghyuck after they turn the corner, kicking his shoe gently.
“Hey, get up. How much did you drink?” You’re not actually curious about how much alcohol he consumed, you just want to know if he can even respond to simple questions.
“Babe!” He exclaims when he looks up, “Oh, not much. I could go for another round right now, actually.” His words slur together and he sways in his sitting position against the brick wall of the auditorium.
“You’re not going for another round, you’re going home. C’mon.” You grab onto the sleeve of his puffer jacket, pulling him up so that he’s standing. He immediately falls onto you, his arms around your waist and his legs spread wide so that his head is hidden in your neck.
“Hyuck, you have to walk. Get up.” You pull him up once again, putting one of his arms around your shoulders and giving him more support around his waist. Slowly, you begin to walk away from the auditorium with Donghyuck’s drunk mumbling filling the cool air. His legs barely work underneath him, and he turns his head and leans into your ear every once in a while to sing some random lyric that pops into his mind at that second, like a small concert that he allows only you to hear.
Once you reach the top of the staircase, you stop and take a long look down to the bottom, “Why did you have to come all the way up here? How are we getting down the stairs?” If you start to climb down, Donghyuck could fall and hurt himself. You’re not that strong to begin with and your shoulders are already feeling sore from carrying most of Donghyuck’s weight.
“We can ride this.” He giggles and breaks away from you, one of his legs swinging over the handrail so that he’s straddling it.
“No, no, no.” You pull him off, but his shoe gets caught against the rail and he comes falling down onto you, both of you landing on the top step of the staircase. You wince in pain at how your back hits the concrete, but you don’t think about it much as you push Donghyuck off of you and into the space next to you on the top stair.
“Oh, no. Are we stuck up here?” He asks as you brush your hands together to get rid of the little pieces of concrete in your skin.
“Yes, and it’s all your fault. What are you gonna do about it?” You reply, so sarcastically that even Donghyuck’s drunk brain registers the joke. Your heart almost leaps out of your throat when he grabs your hands and pulls you closer to him, gently picking out each little ball of cement in your palms.
“I’m sorry I keep hurting you.” He apologizes. This close, you can smell the alcohol in his breath, mixed with his shampoo and cologne. He smells warm in this cold weather, and you feel like falling into him and drinking up his scent, not even minding the alcohol stench.
“Keep hurting me?” You ask.
“Yeah, that must be why you don’t want to be with me. I have to be doing something wrong for you to hate me.” He sighs, sniffling and enclosing your hands in his, his glassy eyes looking up at you and his long hair hangs down over his forehead and tickles his eyelashes. “I’m a bad soulmate.”
The way he says it makes your heart break. It makes you feel regret 1000 times worse than what you’ve been feeling these past few weeks; as if all of the worry and sadness hit you all at once, you feel like crying.
Isn’t he supposed to be the one who hurts you? Why does it feel like you’re the only one doing the hurting?
“You’re not a bad soulmate,” It’s not Donghyuck’s fault that he got stuck with you, or that things will turn out the way that they’re destined to, “And I don’t hate you.”
“You don’t?” He looks up into the night sky and sways a bit as he thinks, “Then why won’t you be with me? Hm?” He tilts his head, his lips pouting as he thinks. You desperately want to find an answer that’ll soothe him, but nothing you can come up with will give you that result, the truth included.
“It’s complicated…” You trail off, and your answer makes Donghyuck snort.
“How? I’m your soulmate, you’re mine. What else matters?” He laughs incredulously.
“What if you’re not just my soulmate?” You ask him, surprising yourself with how easily you can ask the question, probably because the influence of alcohol over him has you more at ease, “What if something happens in the future? I’m just… looking out for me, and for you.” You explain, trying to sound as vague as possible.
When you glance at Donghyuck, he looks dead serious. You think that maybe he has suddenly sobered up with how deep and calculating his eyes look. One of his hands tighten around yours while the other slowly raises to your hair, pacing himself along the way, and pausing before he touches you. When you don’t stop him, he gently caresses your hair and moves it away from your face, his nimble fingers sliding to your jaw. He moves your face so that your eyes meet his.
“I know I’m drunk, but I can make this promise again when I’m sober. I’ll make this promise every single day for the rest of my life, only if it means you can be there with me to fulfill it.” The severeness in his tone is like a wake up call about how serious this is for him.
“What promise?” You whisper back.
“It’s not just a ‘you’ or just a ‘me’ now. It’s an ‘us.’ And I will do everything I can to not hurt us.”
He says it with so much conviction that you somehow believe him. You finally fall into him and rest your tired head on his shoulder as he welcomes you into his warm arms. Maybe it’s foolish of you to think you two can go against fate’s words, but with him by your side, you feel like you can conquer the whole universe.
“Stop smiling like that, you’re making it very obvious that you got laid for the first time.” Donghyuck peers over his laptop screen to Renjun, where he has had a permanent smile on his face ever since he, Donghyuck, and Jaemin met up today to study in the lounge center of their dorm building.
“You know, Haechan, I’m not even mad at that. It’s more than what I can say to you.” Renjun tries to hide his widening smile while looking down at his own laptop, but that paired with Jaemin’s quiet laughter leaves Donghyuck bitter. “Didn’t you and ___ make up?” Renjun asks.
“They were fighting? I thought they just weren’t talking to each other?” Jaemin asks.
“Isn’t that fighting?”
“Kids.” Haechan cuts them off, “Not that it’s any of your business, but we were not fighting and we did make up.”
“That makes no sense.” Jaemin mutters and squints his eyes at Donghyuck.
“I’m older than you.” Renjun retaliates, but Donghyuck pretends like he doesn’t hear.
“We’re just… taking it slow.” Donghyuck ends his explanation with a firm nod of his head, and Renjun shuts his laptop and turns to his friend.
“Can you take it slow during the Fair this weekend? I’m planning to go with Mya and accidentally bought two pairs of tickets. I’ll give you the other pair.” Renjun leans into his friend’s side and wiggles his eyebrows.
“At what cost?” Haechan leans in as well and raises an eyebrow.
“Help me with my English project.”
“No way,” Haechan leans back and focuses on his own laptop screen again, “I haven’t even started mine, I don’t have time to help you with yours.”
“Please,” Renjun draws out the word, grabbing Donghyuck’s sleeve and tugging at it so hard that he can’t properly type, “I suck at English, and unfortunately it’s the only thing that you’re better at than me.”
“The only thing?” Donghyuck glares at Renjun. “Now I’m definitely not helping you.” When Renjun whines at that Donghyuck gets a devilish idea, and it shows by the smirk on his face, “... Unless, you’d like to show us how you really need help.”
At Donghyuck’s proposition, he leans back in his chair with his arms folded across his chest while Jaemin mirrors his actions, his own goofy smile on his face as he waits for Renjun to either accept or deny the proposition, but he hopes he’ll accept it.
Renjun looks between his two friends and sighs, dropping his head down as he mentally prepares himself. When he lifts his head, he looks at Donghyuck with his lips pursed, his pointer finger over them and makes a “kyu” sound that is way higher than his original speaking voice. Jaemin and Haechan immediately burst into as quiet of laughter as they can, Jaemin reaching over the table to poke Renjun’s cheek at his cuteness.
“I never said to act cute, I just wanted you to say please again.” Donghyuck jokes through his snickering, and Renjun immediately stands up from his chair to take a fistful of Haechan’s jacket and pull back his other fist, all cuteness gone from his facial features in a split second.
“Okay, okay, sorry, sorry.” Haechan tries to pull away, his voice rising as Renjun holds onto his jacket tighter and threateningly leans in.
“Hey, quiet down.” Someone whisper-shouts from a few tables away, and it makes Renjun let go of Donghyuck and slowly sit back down. “This isn’t even a library, why are they shushing me.” He grumbles.
“You guys have fun on your date,” Jaemin sighs as he begins to put away his things, satisfied with the study session and with his friends' mischief, “I would go too, but I don’t feel like being a fifth wheel.”
Once your classes end on the day of the Fair, you and your roommate meet up with Donghyuck and Renjun outside of the Fair grounds. You and Donghyuck walk side by side, a bit behind the other couple as they lead the way, practically in their own little bubble. Your hands are shoved in your pockets to keep them from turning numb from the cold and you try to shove your head as far into your jacket as you can to keep your face and neck protected from the wind. Other than the chilly weather, it’s a perfect day for a Fair.
You don’t seem to notice Donghyuck’s predicament right beside you; he’s trying to find a way to hold your hand, but you don’t move them out of your pockets. Actually, Donghyuck is sure you’re doing this on purpose, since he has been trying to touch you the moment you met up with him tonight.
“So, what do you wanna ride first?” He asks you. After looking around the area, your eyes land on a tea cup ride, where the large cups move in circles and also spin in their spots.
“That.” You point to it. Before you can move, Donghyuck latches into your hand that was pointing into the air and pulls you to the ride, a smug smile on his face at how he succeeded in finally sharing some skin to skin contact.
The ride was, to say the least, nauseating. Not that it was disgusting, but Donghyuck wouldn’t stop spinning your individual cup around in fast circles, and you were so sure that you would fling off any second due to the strong velocity those tiny cups have when they go at full speed. However, walking off of the ride with wobbly legs and not being able to see straight was funnier than you thought it would be.
Donghyuck was actually still pretty dizzy when he tried to win a stuffed octopus for you with a dart game. However, he ended up losing $15 while trying to win the game, and you’re sure he would’ve spent more if you didn’t pull him away. After eating some good food and refilling your energy, the sun begins to set on the horizon in a colorful display of red, orange and pink, and people start to make their way to the ferris wheel.
“C’mon,” You hear Mya say from behind you, “We need to get in line first or else we’ll be waiting for half of the night.” She pulls Renjun by his sleeve and passes you and Donghyuck, practically running to the end of the growing line for the Ferris Wheel. When you see where she’s running to, you stop in your tracks which in turn makes Donghyuck stop. Your intertwined fingers pull you back to each other as he looks at you with a puzzled look.
“I’m… not good with heights.” You confess and look towards the top of the ferris wheel, shivering just at the thought of going that far up into the sky in a metal contraption, “Or small spaces…” You add on.
“That’s okay,” Donghyuck gently reassures, smiling lightly at your sudden timidness about your fears. Honestly, he’s just happy you now trust him a bit more to even tell him what you’re afraid of. “We don’t have to go. We can do something else.”
“Like what?” You ask. Donghyuck purses his lips and looks around, until a set of stairs on the edge of the fairgrounds catches his eye.
“I know a place where we can still get a good view of the sunset without going too far up.” He replies and tugs you along with him towards the set of stairs. They lead down to the park that’s nestled in the middle of your University, which eventually leads to a pedestrian bridge that crosses over a river that runs through your town.
The river isn’t that big, nor is the bridge, but it’s big enough to have your head tilting up in wonder as you gaze at the lights adorning the sides of it, lighting up not only the bridge itself by the sky as well. You’ve seen this bridge from your dorm room, but you’ve never once stood on it, and it looks remarkable from this close up.
Donghyuck continues to lead you over the pedestrian bridge onto the other side, where an outdoor museum that was constructed by art students a few years ago holds several different abstract paintings. His hand in yours, which has been it’s resting place all night, keeps yours warm. You try not to think about how your hands fit into each other like the gears of a hand-crafted watch. The lines on your palms connect with the lines on his; it’s painfully obvious he was made for you and you were made for him.
When you reach the end of the outdoor museum, you turn west and face the sunset just as it’s setting over the skyline. Even though some tall buildings obstruct the view, the colors of the sky stretch overhead and make both you and Donghyuck stand still and appreciate the artwork in the sky.
“You like these kinds of things, huh? Sunsets, and ponds, and that kind of stuff?” He suddenly asks, not talking his eyes off of the sky. You, however, turn to look at him. He has his eyes screwed as he tries to look at the sunset, obviously not liking the bright sunlight.
“You don’t?” You ask back.
“I think... there are more enjoyable things.” Donghyuck takes a while to make up his mind about what he wants, obviously trying not to make the things you enjoy sound bad to him.
“Then we should go.” You turn around, but he pulls you back to your original spot.
“We walked all this way, we’re watching this sunset even if my feet freeze to the ground.” He tightens his grip on your hand and speaks through his teeth, making you sputter out a laugh and hit his shoulder with your own lightly.
“Sometimes, I wonder why fate put us together.” You ask, watching as the sun moves bit by bit, leaving behind trails of light and the beginnings of stars and the vast universe on the other side of the sky. “We’re different. I don’t know about you, but you are not who I imagined my soulmate would be.” You speak truthfully.
Even though there are some strings attached to Donghyuck’s relationship with you, it didn’t stop you from thinking about what kind of person he’d be— what kind of person fate would pick to be your perfect fit. Maybe they would have some sort of major flaw, like an anger problem or a lack of common sense. Maybe they would be an alcoholic or someone who commits crimes.
When it came to your soulmate, you always thought of something bad considering that they were also going to hurt you in some way. You never thought that your soulmate would be someone as unique and fun as Donghyuck. Fate made it way too easy to be with him, and you’re not sure whether to feel bitter or thankful.
“Well,” He blows some air through his nose, “You’re exactly what I thought my soulmate would be like” Your heart jumps into your throat and beats irregularly when Donghyuck says that, struck with the feeling of surprise once again.
“Mark tells me you’re smart and get good grades, and I know it was you who ordered that soup for me the morning after you took me home when I got drunk. Not to mention, you went out when it was dark to take me home in the first place.” Donghyuck explains, his hand that’s still interlocked with yours waving around as he does so, “You’re willing to help others, you have a good head on your shoulders, and not to mention you guard your heart to the very end.”
“Guarding my heart… That’s an admirable quality? If I remember correctly, it caused you some pain in the past few months.” By now, the last rays of the sun are disappearing over the horizon and night begins to blanket the sky. You turn to your soulmate when he takes more than a moment to answer, watching the way his face reacts to the thoughts turning in his head.
“Yeah, it is a great quality. I think if you completely trusted me the moment you saw me on those stairs, we wouldn’t end up here now. You wouldn’t be the perfect fit for me if you loved me so easily.” He turns to you, a teasing smile playing on his lips. Your interlocked fingers are basically frozen together at this point and maybe your feet really have stuck to the ground, but his words warm you up from the inside out.
“I think I would’ve fallen in love with you even if we weren’t destined to be together.”
Somehow, he manages to remind you of one very important fact that you’ve set aside since the moment you met him. You’ve always put the fact that he’s supposed to hurt you first, and the fact that he’s your soulmate second. However, he is a human and so are you, and you’re both given the opportunity to love one another wholly and truly. People die to have this type of moment. People live their whole lives without experiencing this type of emotion.
It’s time to remember that Donghyuck is your soulmate, first and foremost. He is deserving of love, and you’re now willing to give it to him.
When you pull Donghyuck into you, he feels like it may be a hallucination. Surely your lips can’t be that close to his own. But when he smells the cinnamon on your lips from that churro you had and your fingers sliding up his arm to grip his jacket, he becomes scared that this might actually be a hallucination.
You slowly lean in, almost painfully slow, but Donghyuck doesn’t dare rush you. When your lips do meet, both of you feel complete. The feeling of finishing a lifetime’s worth of work with one gentle kiss is the most delicious feeling ever, different from anything that either of you have ever experienced.
It’s slow and careful, but passionate and full of true love. No matter what happens in the future, it will always be your memory to savor and remember for the rest of your lives.
“___!” You hear Mark’s voice from your right, turning your head quickly to see him stick his hand up in the air and begin to make his way through the throngs of people between you two. You move towards him, attempting to meet in the middle, but somehow he ends up behind you, and you laugh as you attempt to meet again.
“Hey, Mark,” You look over him, noting how well he manages to pull off the choir robe that everyone else seems to look like a sack of potatoes in, “I didn’t know your concerts could get this packed. You guys could start your own group and make it big.” You look around while adjusting the flowers in your hand so they don’t get squished against your chest.
“Nah, it’s mostly just families that come to these concerts. Since there are a lot of vocal majors, there are a lot of families that show up.” He explains.
“So, what does that make me?” You joke, but Mark doesn’t seem to get it and tilts his head to the side.
“You’re Donghyuck’s girlfriend. That makes you family, right?” At the mention of your relationship, you glance down at the flowers in your hand, the flowers that are meant for the aforementioned boy. You nod, mumbling something like a ‘I guess’ before Mark looks down at his watch and sucks a breath through his teeth.
“Okay, I have to go warm up. Make sure you get a seat in the middle, that’s where it sounds best.” He gives you a quick wave as he walks away, and you manage to send one back. Before you know it, the doors to the auditorium open and people flood in to grab the best seat they can.
You barely manage to snag a seat in the middle, an older lady to your right and a grandpa to your left who seem to be unrelated and didn’t mind you sitting between them. You shrug off your coat as you look around, feeling anxiety build up in your chest. You know you don’t have anything to be anxious for, so you deduct that it’s probably Donghyuck.
He invited you to the concert today. For him, it’s part of his final grade for his vocal class and for you, it’s a chance to see him sing on stage. Strangely, he has talked about how much he loves to perform but never wants to sing in front of you. When he told you he auditioned for a solo in one of the songs, and ended up getting the part, you knew you absolutely had to come today.
Pulling out your phone, you send Donghyuck a text saying that you’re seated and that you wish him to break a leg. You see the read receipt pop up next to your text, and although he doesn’t text anything back, the anxious feeling in your chest subsides and you smile to yourself.
“Those are pretty flowers.” Turning your head to the lady on your right, you glance down at the bouquet of black-eyed susans on your lap.
“Oh, thank you.” You put your phone on silent and slip it into your pocket.
“They’re my mom’s favorite.” Your attention turns to a kid who sits on the other side of the woman. He can’t be any older than ten, and his feet don’t touch the ground as he swings them back and forth and looks up at his mother.
“Oh?” You ask, turning back to the older woman, “Would you like some?”
The woman seems to be stunned by your question, obviously not expecting you to hand over flowers at such a comment from her son. She looks almost flustered as she shakes her head at you.
“No, it’s okay. I bet those are for someone special?” She asks while nodding towards the stage.
“They’re for my… boyfriend.” You mumble, still not used to the words leaving your tongue, even though it has been more than a few weeks now.
“Then you should save them for him.” She nods and you smile back.
“But I want one.” The woman’s son pouts, and the mother nudges her foot against his leg. You laugh a bit, using your right hand to hold down the bouquet and your left to pull out a flower. Carefully, you hand it over to the little boy and he grasps it, his pout turning into a smile while he sings a ‘thank you’ and counts the petals on the flower.
The woman gives you a nod, and you all turn to face forward where the students are beginning to walk onto the stage.
The concert went well; you weren’t familiar with any of the pieces of music the choir performed, and many of them were in different languages, but you still enjoyed the performance by the many music students from your university. You managed to catch sight of Donghyuck fairly quickly, and Mark was just a few rows behind him.
Donghyuck’s solo fit his voice perfectly. Maybe you’re biased, but you think no one would be able to match his tone and technique to fit the song as perfectly as he did. Since it was the first time you heard him sing, you were a bit taken back by how amazing his voice sounds and how much control he has of it. It didn’t look like he struggled to hit the notes, and he looked like he was in his element on stage.
After the concert, you wait on the staircase outside of the auditorium building where you agreed to meet up with Donghyuck. You roll on your feet, jumping up and down slightly to keep warm. You clutch the flowers to you, scared that the cold weather might cause them to bend and begin to wilt quicker.
“Oh, it’s the flower lady!” You hear a familiar voice call out, and you turn your head to see the little boy and his mom from earlier… walking with Donghyuck? He has his choir robe hanging from one arm and his other hand intertwined with the little kid.
“Do you guys know each other?” Donghyuck asks, looking between the three of you with confusion.
“We happened to sit next to each other during the concert.” The woman explains, a grin growing on her face as she looks between you two. “This is your soulmate.” She doesn’t say it like a question, she says it plainly and nods her head in content.
“I’m sorry, did you already know who I was when we met?” You ask her.
“No, until I saw the mark on your left hand. I would recognize my own son’s mark anywhere.” Son? This is Donghyuck’s mother?! Your eyebrows must be up to your hairline and you think your mouth might be open, but you can only focus on remembering every little thing you said to her before the concert started to recall if you said anything dumb.
“Let me introduce you properly. This is ___, my soulmate and my girlfriend. ___, this is my mom, Sara, and my half-brother, Hyunjin.” Donghyuck gently takes your elbow and pulls you closer to him.
“It’s nice to meet you.” You politely greet them as if it’s the first time ever.
“Well, I like her. She gave me a flower.” Hyunjin exclaims.
“Back off, she’s mine.” Donghyuck jokes with the kid. “Thank you guys for coming today, by the way.” He continues, “I appreciate my favorite people being here for my first college performance.”
Donghyuck goes to hug his mom as she sets a kiss to his cheek that makes him cringe away slightly. However, you’re still struck to your spot from being included into Donghyuck’s group of favorite people. There’s a warm feeling in your chest at being included into something so special so early on in your relationship. There’s also some anxiety that comes with it, since promises that are made too early hurt the most, but you push the feeling away and soak in Donghyuck’s unconditional love.
After you all bid farewell to each other, and Sara and Hyunjin leave, you turn to Donghyuck with a deadpan expression, “You didn’t tell me I’d be meeting your family today.”
“Would you believe me when I say that I forgot they were coming?” He asks and you roll your eyes, not believing his words at all.
“These are for you.” You push the flowers into his chest and dig your hands into your pockets so that they can finally get warm, “Your solo was… interesting to listen to.” You say with annoyance dripping from every word.
“Thank you,” He replies cutely, not affected by your irritation. You roll your eyes again, but a smile tugs at your lips as well. “What kind of flowers are these? I don’t think I’ve ever seen them?” He asks while digging his nose into the bouquet.
“Black-eyed susans.” You reply, and Donghyuck gives you a weird look.
“That’s such a random flower.”
“They attract dragonflies.” You explain, nudging his side with your elbow. When you glance over to him, he has a smile playing on his lips.
“Should I be giving these to you, then?” He hands them over, but you push them back at him.
“No way. I’m already attracted to you.” You state, turning around to walk back down the staircase. When you don’t hear any footsteps following you, you turn around to find Donghyuck kneeling over with the flowers clutched close to him.
“Are you okay?” Alarm rises in your chest, especially when he shakes his head at your question.
“No, you just made my heart beat really fast and I’m afraid I’m gonna have a heart attack.” You would roll your eyes again, but you’re afraid they might roll out of your head at this point. You climb back up the stairs and yank on his sleeve jacket to make him walk alongside you.
“___, feel my heart. I swear it’s going to beat out of my chest.”
“Shut up, Donghyuck.”
“No, seriously, I think we should go to the hospital.”
“Shut up.”
In the morning, Donghyuck loves to wake up next to you. He has always been a spread-out type of sleeper; arms to the side, legs open, laying diagonally across the bed. Once you two moved out of your dorms and moved into an apartment together during your second year of college, Donghyuck’s way of sleeping changed dramatically.
Now, he can’t help but snuggle in, wrap his arms around you, tangle his legs in with yours, and do everything he can to sleep as close as he can to you. Maybe that’s why he suddenly woke up. The absence of you next to him made him shuffle awake, missing the frame of your body next to his like how it usually fits.
He groggily opens his eyes and immediately shivers, catching the open windows in the bedroom letting in fresh, cool, morning air. Donghyuck shivers once again, blindly reaching for the blanket and wrapping it around his head and shoulders, then making his way out of the bedroom in search of you.
He checks the kitchen, but you’re not there. Then he goes to the living room, and he sees your figure outside on the balcony, the curtains that are supposed to be hanging up in your bedroom moving with the wind as they hang next to you. He tightens the blanket around him and opens the glass door. Even though you definitely heard him come outside, you don’t turn around. You have a cup of something warm next to you and you’re leaning against the balcony while staring out into the city skyline, watching the sun rise into the sky to welcome the new day.
“Good morning.” Donghyuck mumbles as softly as he can. When you mumble back a reply, he opens the front of the blanket so he can swallow you into his embrace. His chin rests on your shoulder and tries to guess exactly what you’re looking at, but when he lifts his head to look at your face, your eyes are closed.
“So, do you want to tell me why our curtains are out here and not on our windows like they should be?” He rests his head against yours, also closing his eyes.
“I woke up and suddenly felt the urge to clean them, I don’t know.” You laugh a bit, making both of you move with the movement of your chest. Donghyuck smiles at your reason; one of the things he learned about you when you moved in together is that your work ethic comes in random bursts of energy, rather than carefully planned out schedules to follow. You always have a small goal for every day, and sometimes you don’t even know what it is until it randomly pops into your head. Although he doesn’t really understand how you’re able to work like that, he loves this little quirk anyway.
“Did I wake you up?” You whisper and nudge your head into Donghyuck’s, nuzzling back into him when a particularly strong gust of wind blows over the balcony.
“Not technically, no. You not being next to me woke me up.” He replies.
“Well, I’m here now. How about we sleep some more?” You ask, leaning back against him and looking at his face.
“Best thing I’ve heard today.” He sighs. Without letting you out of his blanket trap, he walks you both back into the apartment and into your bedroom, both of you beginning to giggle at one point when you almost trip over the blanket and crash into the ground.
Thankfully, you both made it back safely to the bed, falling into the soft mattress. Immediately, Donghyuck gathers you in his arms and cuddles you to him, almost like he’s latching onto you. You wrap your arms around him slowly and lean into his shoulder, placing a kiss against his collarbone. You were going to stop there, but when he lets out a whimper at the small press of your lips to his skin, you continue moving up his neck.
When you reach the space underneath his ear, he twitches at how you suck on the sensitive skin, not expecting you to pay closer attention there. His hand slides over your back, between your shoulder blades, and back down, pressing you to him as he caresses you and silently hopes you don’t stop what you’ve started.
You don’t seem to have any intention to do that when you lean back, looking up at Donghyuck’s big, round eyes as they stare down hazily at you and quickly connecting your lips. He kisses back slowly, as if taking his sweet, sweet time in loving you.
“I thought we were supposed to sleep?” You ask between kisses.
“We can sleep later…” He trails off, grabbing your hand and pulling you on top of him so that you’re straddling his hips. “... If you’re really tired we don’t have to.” He suddenly pulls away, his hand comfortably resting over your waist.
“No way. It’s too late for that.” You answer, pulling your shirt over your head and tossing it to the other side of the bed. A chill runs through you at the cold temperature in the room, goosebumps forming over your arms and your nipples hardening. Donghyuck wraps his arms around your middle and presses a kiss in the valley of your chest, moving over until he reaches your left nipple and taking it into his mouth.
Biting your lip, your hands find his hair and tug on the long strands. Donghyuck’s hands squeeze your sides and his fingers draw random, little lines over your bare skin as he sucks and plays with your nipples, switching between each one.
“Hyuck…” You whine, giving a particularly sharp tug to his hair when he bites down onto your right nipple. “Please…” You trail off.
“Hmm? Please what? What do you want.” He leans back and looks up at you. You comb your fingers through his hair, pushing it back away from his face and behind his ears. His eyes are clouded and hooded over by the thoughts of you that are speeding through his mind.
“Please, make love to me.” You say it shyly, your eyes looking over his face but not meeting his own. He can’t help but smile at your timidness. You act like it’s the first time those words came out of your mouth. He can’t help but find it endearing how you ask him to make love to you every single time you find yourselves in this position.
“Of course, anything for you.” He connects your lips again, keeping the slow and steady pace from before. He shifts around as he moves his boxers away. Breaking the kiss, you move his hands away and pump his shaft, glancing up at him as he leans back with his weight on his hands and his head leaning back.
He lets out whines every time you twist your wrist, and you almost want to take a moment and stay this way, loving the sounds coming from Donghyuck’s mouth and how he looks as he pants beneath you. However, the tension growing between your legs makes you stop and sit up, pulling off your own pajama bottoms and underwear, throwing them somewhere along with your shirt.
Donghyuck grips your hips with one hand, the other pressing his middle finger to your slick folds, watching you squirm from above as he slides his finger through slowly.
“Just— Can you just do something already?” You almost whine out, grabbing onto his arm hard enough that you leave crescent moons in his skin.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, yes, I’m sure.” With your permission, Donghyuck positions himself at your entrance and slowly brings your hips down, watching your reaction throughout it all. The way your jaw slacks and drops open to the way you swallow when your hips meet with his, closing your eyes in pleasure at how he manages to fit inside you so perfectly. When everyone says your soulmate is made specifically for you, they really do mean in every way possible.
You sit like that for a moment, before opening your eyes and looking at your lover. He helps you move your hips up and back down, you let out a gsap at the sparks that fly up your spine. Your hips start to move in unison, yours grinding down and his moving up to meet yours in a steady rhythm, like a dance to music only you two can hear.
Your nails hurt when they move over his shoulders and chest, leaving temporary marks, but Donghyuck doesn’t mind. Actually, he loves it when you tug on his hair and scratch up his back, his whines turning into full out groans when you lean in and attach your lips to the side of his neck, pressing hot kisses down to his collarbone and biting down gently in the same place this whole situation started.
“H-Hyuck, I—” Before you know it, you’re so close to your orgasm, it’s basically right in front of you to reach out and accept.
“I know, baby, I know. You can come, I got you.” He answers back messily, using the last of his energy to keep your hips in place and drive himself into you. You let out a shriek at the sudden pleasure, only a few more deep thrusts into your hole and you’re falling over him as your orgasm spreads to every crevice of your body.
Donghyuck loves the way your muscles seize and flutter around him, making him pant and his thrusts become sloppy as he comes as well, his warm seed filling you up as he rides through his high. You both fall into the mattress below, you on top of Donghyuck, too tired to roll over and opting to just rest on his sweaty chest.
“I think that was way better than sleeping.” He says, his chest rumbling underneath you as he speaks.
“What a good way to tire ourselves out.” You yawn.
In the last few moments before your tired bodies fall asleep, you find Donghyuck’s hand and intertwine your fingers together, happily and contently falling asleep with the fresh air coming through the window and the sunlight now fully streaming into the room.
In the late summer before your and Donghyuck’s last year of university, you attend a wedding. Not just any wedding: Yuqi and Lucas’ wedding.
Although the ceremony is held outside, there’s a nice breeze that keeps the guests from getting too hot and sweaty in the summer sun. The whole wedding is held in a botanical garden and the place is decorated in white and purple, lilacs and daisies filling vases everywhere you go and freshening the air with their scent.
You and Donghyuck walk into the room inside the administrative building that’s designated for the bride. Yuqi is there, her face shining brightly with happiness and a glow that can’t be stolen from her today.
When you walk in, you let out a sound of delight at how pretty your college friend looks in her wedding dress, taking note of the chamomile flowers that adorn her hairpiece.
“Ah, I can’t believe you’re here.” She all but shrieks, embracing you tightly with her small bouquet still in her hands. After she gives Donghyuck a small, welcoming hug, she backs away to look at both of you.
“You look amazing today, I can’t believe you’re actually getting married. Congratulations.” You say sincerely.
“I can’t believe it either, actually. I feel like we’ve been planning this for forever, and now the day is finally here.” She recalls, a blissful look in her eyes even though you’re aware of how much stress she has had during the past few months over this one day.
“Are you nervous?” Donghyuck asks and you nudge his side and send him a look for asking a question like that.
“No, I’m not,” Yuqi laughs, “I feel one hundred percent happy. Like I’m starting the next part of my life with the one I love.”
“I’m glad you can spend the rest of your life with your soulmate, you’re definitely luckier than most.” You muse, and she suddenly softens her expression and takes your hand in hers, gently holding onto you.
“I’m not marrying my soulmate. I’m marrying the one I love. It just happens to be the same person.”
After bidding your farewells and good lucks, you and Donghyuck walk out of the room and head to where the ceremony will be held. He pulls out of sunglasses, propping them on the edge of his nose, and then grabbing your hand and strolling through the exhibits on the way to the ceremony grounds.
Yuqi’s words ring in your head throughout the peaceful walk, specifically how happy she looked to be marrying the one she loves. Somehow, you never thought about separating soulmate from lover; those two people have always been one in your head. You always thought that there can’t be a soulmate without a lover, and there can’t be a lover without a soulmate.
But the moment with Yuqi reminded you of the first time Donghyuck properly confessed to you, the words you can still hear floating through your head whenever your mind wanders off and thinks about him.
“I think I would’ve fallen in love with you even if we weren’t destined to be together.”
Maybe Donghyuck has been wiser than you this whole time. Not that you’d ever admit that to his face, unless you’d like to hear about it at least three times a week for the rest of your life.
Every memory— every year that has passed by with Donghyuck has only grown the idea of soulmate and lover further apart in your mind, and it took the matrimony of your close friends to realize it. You don’t think it’s a bad thing; in fact, you’re lucky that you can call your lover and your soulmate the same person.
You feel something tugging at your hand, and when you look over at your lover, he looks at you expectedly.
“Huh?” You say, dumbfounded since you’ve been in your own little world for who knows how long. Donghyuck laughs, bending over a bit at the funny, bewildered look on your face before straightening up and looking over to you again.
“I said, what colors should we do for our wedding? I personally think I look good in red, but I’m sure we can figure out something less contrasting.” He explains nonchalantly, you realize he’s kicking a random pebble around as you walk. Looking around, confused out of your mind, you turn back to him.
“Are we getting married?”
“Well, yeah,” He does something between a laugh and a scoff before leaning next to you, a serious look that permeates through the shade of his sunglasses, “You do want to marry me, right?”
Your brain is in a complete fritz. If you had a whole day to think about this you could maybe make up a sentence that resembles a sophisticated answer, but you can only shrug.
“Uh, yeah, I guess.”
“You guess?” Donghyuck stops walking, “I just asked you if you want to get married, and you reply with ‘uh, yeah, I guess.’” He mocks your tone and it makes you roll your eyes at him.
“This is the first time we’ve ever talked about this and I got nervous.” You explain, making him relax and stand in front of you with his hands leisurely resting in his pockets. “Of course, someday I would like to marry you. I guess you’re… tolerable.” Donghyuck pushes you away from him and quickly walks down the path, twice as fast as he was walking before. You laugh and follow him, running slightly to catch up.
“Excuse me, Miss, would you like to leave a wish for the happy couple?” A sudden voice stops you, making you turn back around. A man stands with a camera, looking at you expectedly.
“Uh, how?” You look from the camera and back up to him.
“I’ll take your picture. You can write a wish on it and hang it up over there.” He points to the dozens of polaroids already hung up a few feet away, random people posing in the photographs with different color writing on every picture.
“Let’s do it.” Donghyuck comes up behind you, no doubt catching the last part of what the photographer said and pushing you lightly over to where there’s better lighting while taking off his sunglasses and tucking them into his shirt. The photographer asks you to pose, and you and Donghyuck smile for the camera, your eyes slightly shut due to the sun beating down on top of you.
“Great, how about one more for yourselves?” The photographer asks as he waits for the photograph to develop and you agree. This time, Donghyuck wraps an arm around you and pulls you closer so that your back is against his chest. You feel him rest his cheek on your head and drape his other arm around your front. You grab onto his forearm, not knowing what to do with your hands, and then suddenly the picture is taken and the photographer hands over both of the developed photos.
You take the second picture out of Donghyuck’s hands, not being able to look away. The sun seems to hit both of you just right, and the slight candidness of the photo adds another layer of reality to the picture. Donghyuck has a small smile while his cheek is slightly squished against your head, but he still looks as handsome as ever.
“What wish should we leave them?” He asks, picking up a golden sharpie from the table nearby, somehow already having his sunglasses back on.
“Maybe just… Congratulations on getting married?” You suggest.
“And a million other people will have the same thing. We need to be memorable.” He stresses and taps the end of the sharpie against his head. “What do you wish for Lucas and Yuqi?”
“I wish…” You think about it for a moment, “For them to have a lifetime of memories that they can share until the very end.” You nod.
“Oh?” Donghyuck looks at you, “When did you become a poet?” He asks as he writes that down at the bottom of the first picture.
“I’ve always been like this. I’m glad you just now figured it out.” You reply sarcastically, to which Donghyuck replies back with his own sarcastic laugh. He hangs up your picture close to where Mark and Xiaojun hung up their’s, and then turns back around.
“Alright, let’s get this show on the road.” He pushes up his sunglasses with his ring finger and thumb, walking with swagger towards the ceremony and grabbing your hand while he’s passing by.
“If you’re going to be like this at our wedding, maybe I’ll have to change my mind…”
For one today being one of the most awaited days of your life, it started out pretty regularly.
You wake up from the ringing of your alarm, get ready, and go to your classes for the day. You had breakfast before you left, and lunch right before your last class of the day. Even work was boring as usual, but nothing beat going to the store afterwards.
When you got to the aisle filled with shoes, you were first puzzled by how many options there are. So many colors and styles, you didn’t expect to be so overwhelmed and accidentally spent almost an hour just looking at every individual pair. This had to be perfect. This was going to be a memory that you thought about for the rest of your life.
You call Donghyuck when you approach your front door, he answers almost immediately.
“Hey, love, what’s up?” He yawns through the words, and you can’t help but smile as you look down at the bag in your hands.
“Oh, I was just wondering when you’ll be home.” You open the front door and shut it behind you, taking off your shoes.
“I’m right outside of our building. Did you just get home?” He asks, no doubt hearing the front door from your side of the line.
“I’ll talk to you when you get up here then, see you.” You send a kiss through the phone and abruptly end the call. If Donghyuck is right outside of the building he’ll be up to your apartment in just a few minutes.
You drop the rest of your things down at the front door and hurry into the kitchen, setting down the small white bag with a lace bow on top in the middle of the kitchen table, clearing the table of anything else. You slide into a seat at the table, fixing your clothes nervously as you hear the front door open. Not even a few seconds later, Donghyuck walks into the kitchen, his eyes moving from you to the white bag and back to you.
“What’s wrong?” He asks, dead serious. Your nerves and anxiety, and maybe even some fear, must be strong enough for him to feel. You shake your head and pat the chair next to you. Donghyuck takes a seat, he came through the door so quickly that he didn’t even take his shoes or his jacket off yet.
“Open the bag.” You can’t help the excited smile and small clap of your hands as he reaches out and holds the bag. He gives you a quizzical look, but you only nod to encourage him.
Donghyuck unties the lace ribbon, looking down into the bag for a few moments. You can’t read his face and you can’t feel any emotions from him, and your anxiety grows tenfold. He reaches in and pulls out the little shoes, a light blue color with white stitching. They’re so small, they can sit in Donghuck’s hand perfectly.
“What are these?” He asks, still looking at the shoes in his hand.
“Well, they’re shoes… For babies. For our baby.”
At your reply, he does nothing. He doesn’t react at all, which only worsens your nerves and makes your leg twitch up and down as you wait for him to say something. He swallows and sets the shoes on the table, still looking at then with a blank expression.
“You’re pregnant?”
“Yeah…” You reply, reaching out to put a hand over Donghyuck’s, “Say something.”
“I’m not sure what to say, this is very… sudden.” He tilts his head. Your stomach drops at the lack of emotion in his voice. You aren’t sure what you were expecting, but it was not this stoic expression in his face. Whatever traces of a smile that you had on your lips vanishes and you grip his hand tighter.
“I know this is not what we had planned. I know this is kind of… not good timing, since we’re still in school and not married, yet. But this is what fate had planned for us, I guess?” You’re not sure if you’re trying to console him or convince him, but the icky feeling in your stomach tells you Donghyuck’s reaction to the situation is not good.
“Yeah, fate did us real good.” Donghyuck replies sarcastically and you drop your hands from his, resting them in your lap. You can see the tears forming in his eyes even when he tries to look away from you, and you can feel the fear that’s boiling and overflowing inside him.
“I know you’re scared, I’m scared too. But we can get through this to—” You’re suddenly cut off by Donghyuck standing up abruptly.
“I’m not scared. I’m worried.” He rubs his face with his hands. “I’m worried that I won’t be able to support this kid. I’m worried I won’t be able to be here for you through it all. I’m so worried I’m going to end up like my father that I feel like it’s going to eat me alive.” He runs his hands through his hair, pulling his head back as he looks at the ceiling and paces around the kitchen.
“I never knew your father, but from what you told me, you’re nothing like him.” You stand up too, your legs feeling like jello.
“No, you don’t understand. What if I say something wrong and ruin this kid’s life like my father did to me? What if I can’t find a job after we graduate? Are you going to support all three of us? I can’t let you live like my mom did, it was too hard to watch back then and it’ll be even harder to watch now.” He suddenly stops, not giving you a chance to speak as he looks from you, to the little shoes, and back to you. “I can’t.”
“You… can’t what?” There’s panic rising in your voice as he shakes his head and backs away.
“I can’t be here, not around you or this baby. I won’t be a good father.” He turns and walks out of the kitchen, leaving you standing dumbfounded with tears brimming in your eyes. You move to the front door, watching at Donghyuck’s shaking hands pick up his keys and wallet.
“Are you leaving me? Right now?” He doesn’t look at you and he doesn’t answer, opening the door, “Wait!” You cry out. He stops, his shoulders tense and his hand clenching the doorknob.
“What about that promise you made me? Huh? You said that it’s not just a ‘you’ or a ‘me’ now. It’s an ‘us.’ You said you’ll do everything you can to not hurt us.” You ask, recalling the promise Donghyuck made back when you two were young college students, and a promise he has repeated and vowed to you over and over again every time your relationship got into a rough patch.
“I think… that what I’m doing is what’s best for us. It’ll be better if I wasn’t here. ___...” He looks back at your teary eyed figure with one last look of regret, “I love you. I’m so sorry.” And with that, he closes the door, leaving you all alone in your cold and dark apartment.
You jumped off of the bridge. You jumped off a while ago, actually, but the fall took longer than you expected. You thought Donghyuck would be there to catch you at the bottom, but he’s nowhere to be seen now. The fall was peaceful and enjoyable, a soft limbo between making the hardest decision in your life and the ultimate consequence of that decision. The fall was long and made you feel faux comfort, so when you reached the very end, it ended up hurting a lot worse. You knew jumping off of a bridge would kill you, so why did you jump?
You’re not sure how long you stand by the front door, but it’s long enough that the sun sets outside and the room turns dark. You stare at the door, waiting for Donghyuck to come back. You wait for the door to open and for him to run through, hugging you and whispering that he’ll be here for you. You can only walk up to the door and slide down onto your knees, your forehead pressed against the cool wood as you wait.
Tears run down your cheeks silently, your eyes red and your head hurts. You keep your forehead pressed against the door for the whole night, waiting for him to come back. You wait, and wait, and wait. Donghyuck never comes back.
Your heart rips open from pain, it feels like it’s bleeding onto the floor in front of you. Your mind is numb from any other emotion, your body is cold from sitting on the floor, but you can’t get yourself to stand up. That’s when you realize, this is it. This is how Donghyuck hurts you.
What a sick and twisted way for fate to finally serve up her plan. You almost forgot who Donghyuck is supposed to be; the one who loves you, and the one who hurts you the most.
— read epilogue here
#haechan#haechan fluff#nct dream au#nct smut#nct dream smut#haechan smut#nct fluff#nct dream fluff#haechan au#nct au#haechan x reader#nct dream#nct#haechan scenarios#haechan imagines#haechan blurbs#haechan fic#nct scenario#nct imagine#nct blurbs#nct fics#nct dream imagines#nct dream scenarios#nct dream blurbs#nct dream fic#00 line#dreamies
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Are you Angel?
Harry gets hurt while on the job and Y/N gets a phone call she was not prepared for.
Word count: 7413
A/N: hello friends, it's been a while :) this is a continuation to my story Trouble Follows. You don't have to read but it will give you an insight of how Y/N and Harry met. I am thrilled to share more of firefighter harry with you. I adore him and I hope you do as well.
please do let me know what you thought of the story and please reblog! <333
Warnings: angst, breakups, hospitals
A firefighter will always run into a burning building with not a hint of hesitation. All their focus is on saving the people stuck inside.
Running towards trouble is second nature to them.
She knew that.
She also knew what it meant to date a firefighter.
The unreliable hours, the non-frequent communication, the many failed dinner dates. The twenty-four hours shifts when he would then arrive home to just sleep.
Harry had begun to give her a constant comfort that he would eventually come home and climb into bed behind her. He would then gently nuzzle his face in her neck, taking in her sweet honey scent. In contrast, she took in the woody ashy smell that seems to be permanently stained on him.
So trust her when she said she knew what she was in for when Harry asked her to be his girlfriend.
Four months in, she knew she would be here for a long time, maybe forever, if life would allow it.
She was sure; she knew what to expect.
But she didn't, not until she got the call.
The call that would shatter her heart.
The call that would lead her to be sitting in this uncomfortable, ugly brown hospital chair, holding tightly onto his ashy hand. As she prayed on and on to a God, she no longer held close but wished for Harry they were real and would bring Harry back to her.
Y/N prayed for Harry to finally open his eyes and give her a reassuring smile that he would be okay.
That they would be okay.
Until then, she'll wait.
Harry being Lieutenant allowed him to have a consistent schedule. That did not mean there weren't days where he had to pull a double shift or stay back to finish paperwork; he let it pile up.
The one day that was Y/N's was Sunday.
She got him an entire day to lay in bed together and eat all the baked goods she baked for him to try. It was becoming their day. Everyone at the station knew Harry could not be disturbed on Sundays unless it was the end of the world, and even then, they'd have to pry him away from Y/N.
He feels safe in her arms. Harry had never felt that before. Sure, he was surrounded by his firehouse family, but he had never felt so loved in two arms as if she could take all his problems and stresses away. Still, she did exactly that when she would flash him her gorgeous smile and hold her arms open for him to fall into at the end of every day.
Harry knows he's never felt this way, and he won't ever take it for granted.
This Sunday will be different, and she feels it as soon as she wakes up because, in her queen-sized bed, she's alone. No arms wrapped around her waist; no head tucked into her necks as he places soft open kisses to wake her from her sleep gently.
Already, she knows this is going to be a bad day. She feels it in her bones. Having been around trouble for so long, she knows the difference between good and bad. The feelings she has made her want to find Harry and pull him back into bed where she can keep him safe.
Y/N gets out of bed, throwing the warm sheets off her body going to the bathroom to do her morning skin routine, wanting to feel refreshed for when Harry breaks the news; he's going to leave her alone on their day. She knows him well enough; he's cooking her breakfast to make up for leaving her so early in the morning.
She walks out of her bathroom, going straight to her closet and taking out the first sweater she saw. It's a baby blue color and stitched on the left side on top of her heart is: "love me please?" It's Harry's favorite sweater of hers because it's an oversized sweater that fits him well. The only reason she has it back is that he wanted her to wash it and wear it until it got her smell again. Y/N kissed him silly when he told her that, plus she loves that it smells like him now.
Y/N takes one look at her unmade bed and walks away, knowing she's going to crawl back in after Harry leaves her. She walks out and, from the hallway, can hear Harry humming away. If she's honest, she doesn't recognize the song. As she has come to learn, Harry has an interesting taste in music; he has basically heard every song ever to exist. It's a reason they are so good at Four Clovers Thursday Trivia night. She dominates pop culture and films, and Harry takes on music. She's also better at history than him. Their friends love trivia night because their winning always gets them free drinks. It's something she looks forward to each week.
"Morning, H," Y/N says as she approaches him from behind and wraps her arms around his waist. Harry smiles, instantly feeling warm with her arms around him.
"Morning, firebug. Sleep well?"
She mumbles a no, causing Harry to laugh, and she feels it vibrate through her.
"Awe, upset I wasn't wrapped around you." He teases. "I'm making up to you by making breakfast."
She pulls away, spotting blackberries on the counter. "Sure, Jan."
Harry can hear the change in her tone and knows she's still goofing off with him but knows she's upset.
"Angel, come sit. Coffee is ready."
She shakes her head but makes her way over to the chair he pulled out for her. "No coffee. I'll be going back to bed soon." Y/N waits to see if he'll correct her, but he doesn't.
"I'm sorry." He begins.
"No apologies."
"Please let me. I'm leaving you on our day." He pouts.
"As much as I don't want you to go, I'm sure they need you more than I do."
Harry frowns, "I hope you'll never stop needing me." He whispers against her lips before closing the gap. Y/N hums against his soft lips allowing herself to get lost in the moment; she loves his kisses, soft and gentle just as he is despite what his sharp eyes might have one believe.
Harry pulls away after pressing one final kiss on her pouted lips. "I'm sorry I have to go to work, but I know for certain that I can meet you for a late lunch."
"Lunch?" She repeats, arms wrapped around his waist, hoping he was serious with his offer.
He hums. "Yes, 2:30, that bistro with that avocado dressing you like for your sandwich."
"It's a date." She grins, laying her head on his chest letting him hold her tight. He unwraps his arms, letting her go.
"I've got to get going, firebug, but I'll see you later."
"Stay safe, Styles." She tells him as she does every time he leaves.
"Try my best, angel."
With that, he slips his beat-up white Vans with lilac laces and walks out the door; it shuts it behind him. Just as Y/N steps towards it to lock up, it opens back up, startling her. Harry steps back in, and before she can question him, he places both faces on the side of her face and kisses her breathless. Y/N is quick to react, allowing their lips to move in perfect harmony, not as smooth but perfect, nonetheless.
"I--" Harry begins before he clears his throat. "I'll miss you, angel."
Y/N feels the heat rush to her cheeks because, for a moment, she thought he'd say another three words. "And I'll miss you, H. Now get out of here; I don't need you showing up late to our lunch date."
Harry smiles, dimples on full display, hugging her before walking out a skip in his step. She peaks her head out, making sure he gets in the car safely before he drives off. He sits there for a moment, and she knows he is letting his Bluetooth connect as he waits for his drive-to-work playlist titled "it's time" to start playing. He takes a look at his mirrors before backing out and driving. That's when Y/N closes and locks the door.
Time to go back to bed for a few more hours; what else is there to do on a Sunday when she's left alone.
Harry genuinely did not want to go to work today, but it's not like he could say no to his Chief. His Chief was never one to call in favor unless it was an emergency. He didn't ask, knowing he'd get the full story Monday, but for now, he gets on his pants, t-shirt, and boots and hopes there are no fires today.
The only thing is that Harry isn't used to working with the B-shift, sure he knows everyone's name and a little of their lives, but they aren't his usual team. He shakes that off because he knows he would do anything to help a team member and knows they would do the same in return.
Harry is lost in thought, wondering what Y/N was going to do today. He knows she planned to take him to a butterfly pavilion today even told him the outfit she had planned out for it. A pair of jeans that had flowers embroidered all over something she added, saying she thought they looked a bit plain, pairing it with a pastel pink top. Harry was surprised with her style after meeting her various times in different outfits. He was surprised at how soft she dressed in pastels. She may have a bold personality, but her fashion was delicate and warm. It was a nice balance.
He nearly runs into Carols as he made his way to his office, too busy thinking of the girl he left at home. "Sorry, bud."
"No problem, Harry. Surprised to see you here," Carols tells him, everyone knowing Sunday was Harry's day off.
"Chief had something come up and asked me to come in. I should be out of here by eight tonight if we're lucky."
Carlos smiles, "with you around, we usually are."
Harry chuckles, telling him he'll be in his office if he needs anything. He looks around his desk and sighs at how much has piled up already.
Might as well get ahead.
It's a few hours when Harry realizes the house is quiet. He peaks around the window and figures they are all in the common room. It's only one, and thankfully there have been no calls, and if it continues, then he will make it to lunch with his angel.
He shoots her a text.
Angel
13:24 PM
I miss you. Counting down the minutes until I get to see you xxx
Harry clicks send and smiles down at his phone. 2:30 couldn't come fast enough.
As he gets up to stretch and go for a snack in the kitchen, he takes a deep breath because as confident as he may seem, he isn't around the second shift. They don't know him so well, and Harry ultimately is shy. He may be able to hide it, but he has small quicks that others pick up on. Something he knows Y/N spotted quickly, like when he toes his foot into the ground or when he begins to chip at his nails, and Y/N's favorite is when he moves his hands behind his back and sways side to side. She finds it endearing, but others might not think it's leadership material.
He walks into the lounge to cross to the kitchen when a few heads turn to him, but before they can say a word, the alarm rings, and Harry is literally saved by the bell.
Not a second to waste, everyone heads over to the rig and quickly suits up. Harry is Lieutenant meaning he's in charge of the scene today, seeing as their captain and Chief aren't here today. Harry respects all the firefighters and knows this will go well if everyone carries out their job.
It's a factory fire, and as soon as they arrive, Harry can see it's burning fast. He's not sure how many people are there, but he calls in for reinforcements knowing they will need all the manpower they can get.
"This is House 102; please send more units available. The factory fire is burning at a faster rate than we can control. My team is going in now. There are five people unaccounted for; the left side of the building is clear." Harry speaks into his two-way radio.
"Carlos," the young firefighter jogs over, eyes on Harry, no longer staring at the roaring fire. "You're going in with Baz. Stay close and don't go up the second floor; you need to be quick in and out."
"Who's going with you, Lieutenant?" Carlos asks, clearly worried.
"Jameson and Rey are coming with me; stay safe, and if anything happens, just radio in."
"You got it!" Harry pats his shoulder and walks off towards the two waiting men.
Harry knows the men well, he trained them when they came into the house, but they preferred B-shift instead of being with him. One spot was available, and he knew they didn't want to be separated. Rey and Jameson have been dating for two years, but that's a secret only very few know. It's not prohibited, but if it gets more serious, one will have to relocate to a new station. They simply aren't ready for that, and indeed Harry would be sad not to have them around the house or hearing their stories. It just adds a more considerable risk because, at the end of the day, the job is first.
Rey walks towards the entrance with Harry following right behind. Jameson, a few feet back, calling out for anyone in there that needs help.
"Fire department, call out." Echoes out as much as it can as the fire begins to roar louder.
The heat gets worse the further they walk in; they turn right at the edge of a desk labeled "Torres."
"H, there!" Rey shouts, rushing over to a man knocked unconscious and had heavy storage struck over his legs, pinning him down. Harry and Jameson run over, assessing the man before making any sudden moves.
Jameson finds a pulse, weak but there. He gets the extra mask over the man's face hoping it'll wake him up soon.
"On the count of three, we lift," Harry tells the two men standing to a stand as the others do the same.
They nod. "One, two, three." They grunt in unison, pushing the container to a standing position. Harry looks over the man's legs and is thankful there is no blood, but there will be swelling and bruises. "Right, Rey, take him out. We'll keep searching."
Rey nods, lifting the man over his shoulder as he was trained to do, and rushes out of the burning building. Harry and Jameson have just learned a new area when the radio comes on. "Lieutenant Styles, it's Carlos. We found two men; only one remains unaccounted for."
Harry nods. "Got it, no one comes back in. We'll be out soon."
He now leads the way, making his way towards a stairway. There's no fire here, but it's moving faster, and smoke is thick. Whoever is in here might not last much longer without oxygen.
"Fire department, call out," Harry shouts, voice firm.
"Here.." a whisper is heard, both Harry and Jameson freeze. Once more, "here" is yelled but sounds muffled.
Harry looks around, not seeing anything but fire, and fears the structure will collapse soon. Just as he was about to yell again, he sees a can knocked, and a man hidden under a black rag is seen. Jameson rushes over, helping the man sit up. He's older, well into his sixties. He doesn't look too well; he has a few scapes.
"Right, we need to head out," Jameson tells Harry, helping the man stand up who is fighting consciousness.
"This is Lieutenant Styles; on our way out found the last man. Have paramedics on standby."
"Got it, Styles. Get out quick."
Jameson and Harry get the man up and head to exit. Harry can see the light of day and knows he will be late for lunch, but thankful Y/N is understanding and very forgiving. He'll make it up to her by buying dessert.
Just as they almost reach the door, a piece of dry wood comes falling down, separating Harry and Jameson; luckily, it did not hit them, but now Harry has to find a new way out. It's not looking good.
"Harry," Jameson looks panicked, but Harry stays calm.
"Get him out, now," Harry tells him, looking in every direction for what to do.
"No, I won't-" Harry cuts him off.
"Jameson, get this man out. He needs medical attention. That's an order." Voice full of authority with no room to argue.
Jameson nods and heads out. "I'm coming back for you."
Harry chuckles. He sees a small path, but it'd be a more extended way out. He debates what to do. He could wait, but the longer he stays, the quicker this building is beginning to collapse.
It takes him two seconds to decide to go right and find a new route out instead of staying put. He walks and only gets hotter as the fire begins to surround him. He's good at not panicking, always thinks better under pressure, but this is getting intense. Harry climbs over a crate and bends low to go through this tight space. He sees the exit, it's still a bit away, but he knows he is in the clear.
That's when he hears a big explosion knocking him forward. His oxygen masks flys off, landing a few feet away. As Harry reaches his hand out to get it, he's pulled back. He looks behind and sees he's stuck. There are crates stacked on top of him. The air is thick of smoke, and with no oxygen, it seems like the fire will soon enough engulf him.
Shit.
He's really in trouble now.
Harry presses his radio, holding it, hoping it's still working. "This is Harry," He coughs. "I'm trapped under a few crates. I can't reach my ask. I'm west of the building."
"Harry, hold on. We're going in." Harry hears Jameson reply, but he's fading quickly.
He shakes his head. "Can't go to sleep, but this smoke is too thick to actually see anything, let alone for his team to find him.
"Tell…" He coughs again, and this time doesn't stop for what feels like five minutes but is only a few seconds. "Tell angel, I'm sorry."
A voice comes over the speaker, but Harry's eyelids are fluttering shut, the weight of the crates is too much, and the smoke only gets deeper in his lungs if he keeps speaking.
Harry welcomes the darkness as he sees the one person he was supposed to meet for lunch. She's holding an outstretched hand for him to take and who is he to ever say no to her.
Real or not, he goes to her, and soon enough, he falls unconscious, not feeling when his team lifts him out and puts him in the back of an ambulance.
Y/N decided to show up a bit earlier for their lunch date, putting in their order early, wanting to maximize all their time together. She wouldn't see him until late that night, and honestly, she wasn't a fan of being separated on her favorite day of the week.
She sits on a bench right outside, both sandwiches wrapped tucked away in a brown paper bag and a lemonade sitting next to her untouched. It was his favorite, too sweet in her opinion. Still, Harry loved it, especially since he wasn't one to indulge in sweets unless they were hers.
Knowing Harry could be running late, she pulls out a book from her orange tote bag that Harry gifted to her. The book was Beach Read, Frankie recommended it to her then gave her the book saying she needed to read more romance books and not just poetry and nonfiction books. She actually enjoyed it, which surprised her, but even if she didn't, she's too invested to not find out the ending.
She was just starting chapter five when she feels too much time has passed and glances down at her phone.
2:55
25 minutes late isn't bad or unusual even; she decides to put the book away and keep an eye out for him. Usually, when he keeps her waiting, he makes up for it with a long kiss that never fails to take her breath away; she's excited about it now.
Time seems to go slower when she just sits waiting. She debates beginning to eat her sandwich when her stomach starts to growl. It's low, but she would feel bad if she began to eat, and that's when he shows up. She settles for waiting and instead takes a drink of the sweet lemonade.
As Y/N sits waiting for Harry, her phone begins to ring and displays an unknown number but the city's area code. Every bone in her body tells her to prepare for the worst but hopes she's paranoid.
She takes a deep breath before answering and bringing the phone up to her ear.
"Hello, are you angel?" A deep voice man asks.
"It's Y/N. Actually, can I ask who's calling?" She's holding her breath; only one person calls her angel.
"I'm calling on behalf of Lieutenant Harry Styles. Harry has been in an accident and was taken to the hospital. He asked us to call an angel on his way to the hospital. We assumed you were one of his emergency contacts."
Y/N feels her hands begin to shake. "What hospital?"
The man on the phone rattles the information, and she lets it all sink in. He hangs up, and she sits there waiting on the bench for her date that will not be showing up.
Her phone rings again, she answers without looking at the caller.
"Y/N," she recognized the voice; it's Mitch, and if he's calling, then it must be true.
"Mitch," she whispers, not recognizing her own voice. It's shaky, tears beginning to well up.
"Where are you?"
"At the bistro a street down from the station." She replies, hoping he's coming for her.
"I'm close; we'll pick you up and go see him, darling." She nods but remembers he can't see her.
Y/N isn't sure why she's not crying. She feels the tears, but it's like they are stuck; her heart hurts, and she knows that says enough. "We were supposed to meet for lunch. I got worried when he didn't show up, but I didn't think--" he interrupts her.
"Harry is going to be fine, trust me. He's okay, and he needs us there."
Y/N doesn't reply because she sees him pulling in. Mitch is in the passenger seat, Sarah is driving. She doesn't say a word as she swings open the door and settles in the back.
She sets her hands in her lap; she can feel herself trembling. She can feel herself breaking because she won't know if he's okay until she sees him. Mitch can say he's fine, but she needs to see for herself.
Sarah and Mitch share a concerned look; Y/N doesn't notice her eyes looking out the window.
"Y/N?" Mitch begins, voice full of concern. "Do you- are you okay to go see him?"
"Of course." She replies quickly. "He needs me; well, I hope he does."
"Course he needs you. Needs his angel by his side." Sarah tells her calmly, wanting to see her smile, but it doesn't work because only Harry should be calling her that. She shouldn't be on her way to see him in a hospital bed. She should have seen him next to her on that bench as he ate his sandwich and gave her kiss and kiss as she told him stories.
They are silent the rest of the way. Sarah pulls into an empty parking space, and she rushes after Mitch, who seems to know exactly where Harry is as he rushes past the front desk. The only thing that slows them down is waiting for the elevator; she gladly would have taken the stairs if Mitch didn't tell her that he's on the sixth floor. Instead, she waits impatiently for the old elevator that will take her to see her love.
He is going to be okay. He has to be okay. Y/N keeps those thoughts running through her head as Mitch and Sarah guide her to room 613.
Mitch walks in first, holding the door open, Sarah places a comforting hand on her back, and Y/N feels supported and loved, but nothing prepares her for what she is about to walk into.
The constant beep of Harry's heart monitor is the only thing that can be heard in his private room. The beep is steady; it makes her let out a deep breath. The monitor already calming her down, she approaches slowly as if he'd wake if she'd walk any faster.
She sits in the uncomfortable chair next to his bed and pulls it as close as she can.
Y/N just stares at him, taking it all in. He looks like he's resting peacefully like he should originally have been when they started this day together. His curls are disheveled, his face dirty with smoke stains and a few gauzes wrapped around his arms. She can't see much else but knows he's got a road of recovery still ahead of him.
"Hi, Harry," she whispers, her hand slowly reaching under the white sheet to grab hold of his right hand. "I'm right here, okay. Take your time waking up; there's no rush. Just know that I'm not going anywhere."
She pauses, hoping for a reply even though she knows she won't get one. "We can also discuss how I'm sort of one of your emergency contacts."
Y/N presses her lips to his hand. "Need you to wake up, want to see those Rapunzal eyes." She sits back, not removing her hand from his. Sarah has not taken her eyes off of her, Sarah might feel like she might blow up soon, but being at his side, she has begun to feel better.
"Harry, we're here for you. The whole team is outside in the lobby, probably why they sent us to the floor with the biggest waiting area. Even young Carlos is out there, saying you gave them a scare but really hopes you never pick up another B-shift again." Mitch sniffles before stepping out of the room. Sarah walks over to where he was standing.
"Hey Harold, it's trivia night in a few days, and kind of counting on you to get us those free drinks." Sarah chuckles. "It's been a while since we've been in the hospital. I think it was when I made you all donate blood for that ambulance competition. Fun times, now you rest and get better. The good thing is you have the best nurse looking out for you." Sarah glances at Y/N, sending her a small smile.
Y/N sits back in her chair as Sarah sits in one by the window. She knows she's in for a long afternoon and an even longer night.
Harry's head is throbbing.
He's not sure why. The last he remembers is leaving Y/N's house to go for his shift at the station.
They were meeting for lunch; he's sure she wouldn't let him drink any alcohol on the job.
Harry slowly opens his eyes and is blinded by the bright light. He sees a photo of the sunset right in front of him, and a tv hung up; if he's not mistaken, he's in a hospital room, primarily due to being in an uncomfortable bed. The oxygen mask over his face is also a dead giveaway he was in an accident.
He looks around, and he sees he is not alone. His angel is sleeping, a tight grip on his right hand; she looks exhausted. Mitch walks in just as Harry was about to wake her. Y/N mumbles and sits up, pulling her hand away from his to rub the sleep away. Harry wants to tell her to stop knowing how much it actually irritates her eyes, especially when she tubs a little harsher than usual.
"Were you able to find tea, Mitch?" Y/N asks, looking over at him.
"Sarah's bringing it over." Mitch's gaze never turns to her staying on Harry; this confuses Y/N and turns back around in her seat to look at a resting Harry but instead finds his eyes on her.
"Harry!" Y/N scoots forward, grasps his hand in hers. "You're awake. Mitch, the nurse, please."
Harry raises his free hand to take off the mask. He wants to speak, but this won't allow him. "No, love. Got to keep it on."
Harry's eyes close, then flutter open. He stares at Y/N, his eyes kind but defiant. He takes the mask off, coughing a bit; it makes Y/N feel nauseous, knowing he's not doing so well.
"I think you need to keep it on, Harry." She says, "the nurse needs to see it when she comes in soon."
"Hey, angel," he says in a raspy voice. It sounds like he's in pain when he talks.
"Yes?" She asks.
"I'm sorry for scaring you."
Y/N shrugs, "no big deal. I wasn't even scared."
Harry smiles, showering her his dimples since she last saw him this morning. He begins to laugh but stops when it causes him to cough. Y/N lets him settle down before bending down to gently kiss him.
"Now, let that hold you over, and put the mask pack on."
Harry nods. "Anything for you, my angel."
It's a half-hour before the doctor comes in, and by that time, Harry had fallen back asleep, only just waking up a few minutes before the man walked through the door. Mitch alerted everyone outside he was awake and doing good.
Dr. Vazquez walked white coat open, displaying a purple button-up and a bright yellow tie. It puts a smile on Y/N's face.
"Hello, Mr. Styles. Glad you're awake."
"Me too, Doc. Nice tie."
Dr. Vaquez smiles, looking down at himself, "Thank you, my wife picks out my tie every morning before she heads off to work."
"Lucky man," Harry tells him.
"That I am." Dr. Vazquez replies. "You've got a mild concussion, nothing serious, but you are allowed to sleep while you're here. We've got a good team looking out for you. You've got a few burns, but those will heal nicely if properly cared for. A few deep bruises on your leg and one on your rib cage, no blood clots. It will hurt to walk for a few days."
"Nothing too bad, then," Harry sighs, relaxing in bed.
"I've looked at your charts, and it looks like you will be making a full recovery and should be back on the job in three or four weeks. In the meantime, you will need to stay overnight and keep taking in oxygen. I see the nurse changed your mask. Please don't remove this one." Harry nods. "Any questions?"
Harry shakes his head no, "Not at the moment."
"Alright, I'll be off then. I'll come to see you tomorrow midday, and we'll talk about going home. I hear you have a waiting room full of people dying to see; just be aware that visiting hours end at nine, but if you're kind to Nurse Lucy, she'll be lenient to ten."
"Thank you, Dr. Vazquez." Mitch and Y/N say in unison as the man exits the room.
"That's the quietest I've ever seen you, firebug." Harry teases.
"You hush." She lightly pats his arm.
Mitch laughs, "going to go tell them you're allowed, visitors."
Y/N and Harry sit in silence. He can tell she has something on her mind, a slight frown on her face. He wonders if it's about him if she won't be able to handle dating someone who can be hurt by the job. Harry honestly does not want to lose her.
"I'm going to step out," Y/N tells him, looking down at their joined hands, not wanting to meet his eyes.
"Y/N," Harry sighs.
"You've got lots of people waiting to see you and roughly have an hour to see them all. I'll be close by." She leans down, presses a kiss to his cheek, and walks out before he can reach out to stop her.
She steps out while a few members of his team come in to see him offering her a smile as she passes them. As much as she didn't want to leave him, she needed a moment away, and he needed a moment with his family.
God, Y/N has never felt so scared, and now a minute alone, everything is beginning to set in. She has no idea where the restroom is, and the next thing she knows, she's running into someone, but it seems they recognize her because they say her name, and the next thing she knows, she's crying, sinking to the floor. She feels arms wrap around her.
Shushes in her ear, brushing the ends of her hair. It's calming, but she needs to let all the tears she's been holding in.
"Y/N," she can now recognize the voice as Sarah's, "I'm going to help you stand and sit you in the chair.
Y/N feels herself nod.
She begins taking deep breaths, never letting Sarah pull her hand away. It is the only thing keeping her grounded.
"I got her some water." Y/N hears Frankie whisper handing it to Sarah before taking the seat to the left of her.
"I'm okay," she repeats. "I'm okay."
"Y/N," Sarah begins.
"I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize, sweetie." Frankie brushes her hair back.
"I'm supposed to be strong; I have to be strong to do this to stand by his side," Y/N tells them, beginning to let her emotions out.
"No one is expecting you not to cry."
"Bu-" Sarah interrupts her.
"No. stop. Accidents happen, and so do injuries. It's okay to be scared and hurt."
"I want to be strong for him." She whispers.
"You are. You never left his side; you talked to him. You're crying now because you care."
She wipes her eyes with her sweater sleeves. "I love him, and I was so scared that when I got the call, I'd never get to tell Harry."
"Then you tell him as soon as you walk back into his room."
"Thank you."
"Nothing to thank, I care about you, and I know Harry would be grateful to know you're not alone. You've always got us. Now let's grab something to eat, and we'll come back in an hour once all of them go home."
She chuckles. "Alright."
"Text me where you're sitting. I'll pop in to see Harry, then meet you."
"You don't have to," Y/N tells Frankie because she knows she is just as concerned about her friend.
"Are you kidding me? You're my friend first, always."
Sarah and Y/N walk down to the cafeteria. She knows she isn't okay but is feeling better, finally letting emotion out. It was only a matter of time before she let the dam break; she's just happy it was not in front of Harry.
The girls sit in the cafeteria munching on snacks for well over an hour. Mitch sends them a message letting them know all the crew has left and it's time to say goodbye for the night. Frankie wishes her goodnight downstairs with promises to come to see her tomorrow and bring her a change of clothes.
"Let's walk you back," Sarah tells her, linking their arms together.
"Do you think he'll know?" Sarah takes a good look at her and grimaces. "I'll just say I tripped, and it made me cry." Y/N jokes.
"I don't think he'll believe that."
"Yeah, me either." The girls walk out of the elevator as their laughter dies down.
They settle in silence as they make their way to his room, Sarah holding her hand leading the way. Mitch is in the chair she was in for so many hours before waiting for him to wake up. Mitch hears their footsteps and turns his head, but Harry is frowning, looking out the window at the dark sky.
Y/N doesn't know what to say, but one look at him has her heart filling up with relief; he's okay.
He's fine, and he gets to go home soon, and she gets to love him all she wants.
Harry turns his head as she steps forward. "Angel," he breathes out.
It makes her eyes well up with tears again. "I love you," she just lets it out, as if she's told Harry this every day as if she never went a moment not saying it.
"Oh my angel," Harry begins to cry, feeling overwhelmed and incredibly happy. His angel loves him, and although this isn't a perfect day, the moment is.
Mitch and Sarah sneak out quietly, shutting the door behind them to give them their privacy.
"I love you so much. Please come here." Harry replies, voice shaky.
In the next second, she's moving forward, pulling the chair as close as she can as he grabs her hands, squeezing them tightly. She leans down and presses her lips to his chapped pink lips. They move gently, pouring all their love and fears into the kiss. Telling each other that the worst is over and they are together, and they are fine. Y/N pulls back, knowing she can't kiss him as long as she'd like due to his sensitive lungs.
"Harry, I love you, and I was so scared I'd never get to say it."
"I'm sorry, angel; I never wanted you to get a call like this, at least not before talking about it."
"Me either," She sniffles, no longer able to control her tears, "but it happened, and I'm just happy you're okay."
"I'm okay," he repeats. She smiles, taking one of her hands out of his hold to wipe his tears away; Harry can't help but lean his head into her gentle touch. "I'm okay because my angel is always looking after me.
"Harry."
"It's true. I've never been luckier and safer since you came into my life." She smiles. "But there's something we have to talk about." He continues, and by the tone of his voice, it's going to be serious.
"Are you okay?"
"What? I'm fine. You're the one in a hospital bed." Her tone is defensive.
"There's something wrong. I can see it."
Y/n sighs, taking a deep breath. She takes her hand out of his hold.
Harry is quick to mask his hurt.
"I don't like that you're hurt. I hate that we aren't at home in the kitchen dancing around to your Sunday playlist as I bake you a new treat." She says in a rush.
"Hey, love, relax," he says and gestures for her to move in closer. She does so, allowing him to take hold of her hands with a firm grip this time.
"You're upset because I got hurt?" She nods in reply to his question. It's stupid because, of course, he's going to get hurt; it'd be naive to think he wouldn't in his job.
"It's part of the job." He says simply. It's something he wants her to accept and remember. She thinks back to a month into dating when he told her about his ex-girlfriend and how she couldn't handle the unknown of the job each day he left her. Y/N thought she'd be fine, but she loves him, and losing him would be something she could never recover from.
"I know. It's just not easy to see." Her voice was quiet and defeated.
"What do we do?" Harry asks, and Y/N freezes; she can feel her heart beating in her ears.
What do we do?
"What do you mean?" She can feel her hands begin to shake.
"This can happen again." He gestures to him in the hospital bed.
"I know." She says softly.
"Is this something you can handle or not?" He asks very direct. She knows this might not be the first time he's had the conversation, but she just told him she loved him, and he's questioning her. She's allowed to feel this way, but it doesn't mean she can't handle it.
"Y/N," he begins, "I'm incredibly happy with you. I see you and me together for a long time. You're it for me, but this job is my life."
"I know," she repeats. "I would never ask you to give up your job."
Harry stares at her; heartbreak passes through his eyes. "Are you asking me to give you up?
She shakes her and begs for the tears not to fall, but it's no use. She feels them falling and can't wipe them as Harry has a hold of her hands.
"Harry, I love you." He frowns as if fearing the worst. "I love you, and I'd rather love you every moment I have you than let you go now and never know what could have been."
"Oh, thank god." Harry lets out a deep breath. She giggles. "I'm sorry we couldn't have this conversation earlier; honestly, I feared if I brought it up, you could possibly break up with me, and I selfishly wanted to have you longer."
"Well, I'm not going anywhere, not if it's up to me. Seeing you laid up is hard but knowing I get to be there for you makes up for it. Also helps that I'm a nurse."
"That it does."
Y/n grins at Harry, leaning in to kiss him, short and sweet for now. Each kiss never fails to make her heart race, and due to Harry's heart monitor, she knows it does the same to him. They sit in silence, staring at each other as Harry traces small shapes against Y/N's cheeks, loving the feeling of her in his hand. Especially when she lets out a soft giggle when he hits a sensitive spot.
"Move in with me," Y/N blurts out after a while of silence.
It shocks Harry. "What?"
"Until you're better. That way, I can be your in-home nurse."
"Only until I'm better?" She nods. "So, you'll give me the boot after." Harry teases.
Y/N can feel her cheeks warming up but pushes through, "Only if you're a bad patient."
Harry smiles, dimples on full display for her, always for her. "Okay, I can be good and naughty only when you ask."
"Harry!" She gasps.
He throws his head back, laughing.
"God, I'm so lucky to love you." His words warm her heart, and she promises to tell him every day from now on.
"Now get up here and cuddle me. I got Mitch to cue up Netflix."
"Are you sure?" She stands slipping her shoes off, knowing he won't be taking no for an answer.
"Going to deprive an injured man of what he wants most?"
"Guess not."
"Good."
Y/N crawls on and lays on his side, carefully resting her head on his chest. Harry presses kiss after kiss for his comfort, knowing he will be okay and has his favorite person by his side. She chooses Legally Blonde knowing it's Harry's comfort movie as much as he tries to deny it.
For an unusual start to their Sunday, it ends right; together in bed, a hospital bed but nonetheless a bed, together arms wrapped tight around each other.
Y/N might not have liked that Harry got hurt, but he's okay, and he will recover.
That's all she could ever ask for.
thank you so much for reading!
please send me a message of what you thought or if you'd like to see more firefighter harry
I adore you. take care xx
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