#head heavy in your hand
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Even to just feel the directional pull of another Moon, Planet, or Sun is to feel the void pulling you closer. It's why finding one to orbit, or to even witness orbit at all for that matter is so dangerous. There's no sustenance to cling to out here in the night sky, except for what you can pack, and you have to pack light.
It sure is dangerous when you're dark, deranged, and strange without cause. But in this sense the void can be the factor of orbit that tethers you to any sanity at all.
Yes it's dark and cold out here tonight, and in space nobody can hear you scream. But he who seems delighted in madness, was going to make the most of a scream for bewilderment, and get caught whimpering between the cries of passion, than to face the existential nightmare and dread and that sadly is and has become: my memories.
Hindsight is 20/20, but often leaves all the red flags to looks back on merely as flags.
When we are sad, we seek celebration
When we are on top of the mountain tops, we see degradation
What does that say about me?
Will we keep floating forward through space without cause forever? In gazing upon the beauty of one planet, have we drifted out of their orbit?
Captain's log
Logging off
#maybe ive never been as happy as to when you were stroking my beard#head heavy in your hand#you giggling and making fun of me#thats the nightmare im trying to break#ig#idek if i hate you anymore#but im sure tryna have a better best at this point#fuck#at least im tryna fix that#tf im spose to figure out medicaid with 2 days off#and yall keep having me stay later#got me all the way fucked up#at least ive been trying to fix what i can#even if i havent cleaned like anything#or made my bed lol#tethered to fuckin somethin boi i tell you hwat
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death note is so funny because at bascially no point does the main character consider killing someone by any means other than the death note
"i can't do anything to L because i don't know what his name is!!!" hey how about you kill and shoot him with bullets from a gun.
#juney.txt#or maybe wack him over the head with something heavy.#i know about japanese gun laws but still light you have options here#just write the cause of death for some criminal as ''executed for the crime of Murdering L''#and then strangle L to death with your bare hands
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Anonymous asked: Hello!! For art requests, perhaps some zolu? (Zoro and Luffy)
b0yskylark asked: Splickedy!! Maybe you can draw your favorite One Piece ship?? Personally I think if Zoro and Sanji kissed a lil they'd calm tf down lol
I do find Zosan pretty delightful--LOVE a rivals-to-rival/lovers pairing--and for that matter, Franky/Robin is GREAT and whips ass and both pairings were on the candidate list. But lbr I'm a huge sucker for that captain/first mate intense loyalty "til death do us part and you're not allowed to die" shit. plus Luffy being all but canonically ace means I can bring my no-holds-barred-all-romance-no-sex moirail agenda to yet another pairing which is GREAT for me emotionally. eue
What I'm saying is yo ho yo ho a pirates little late afternoon nap holding hands like otters so I don't drift away for me yar har
#One Piece#Roronoa Zoro#Monkey D. Luffy#Zolu#Splickedydoodles#I just meant Luffy's hand to be hanging down but it DOES look like he's just napping with a handful of titty. and honestly. good for him.#first mate roronoa ''canonically biggest bust size on the crew'' zoro your chest looks heavy can i hold it for you U_U#Listen the way Oda draws bodies is not attractive especially as his art's evolved. sorry sensei art is subjective and so on. but!#I'm looking disrespectfully at the Zoro translated into my art style in my head lmao. Anyway I couldn't bring myself to put a shirt on him#Sorry or you're welcome. whichever applies here lololol
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I got. thoughts. about valens and voices in imperial roman history. but I also got a lot of thoughts about uhhhhhh choosing your brother for co ruling the Fratricide Foundation Story Empire. many thoughts about themistius' oration too
Brotherly Love, Themistius (trans. Peter Heather & David Moncur)
â places Iâm at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app / insta
#it's also the Incest-Cannibalism Empire but that's a discussion for a different blog#all of the heavy hitters were Incest Empires btw. that's a feature of Empire across all of time. not always Cannibalism tho. TRAGIC.#but rome specifically being the Fratricide&Stuprum Empire is funny AND makes parts of this speech feel. uh. UHHHHH.#feels like you're trying to overwrite history and while you succeeded ONCE the uncle-nephew antagonism with a body count#somehow feels worse????? feels worse. i dont like anything that happened to valentinian 2#anyway. as a result: i personally will be including the bigamy accusations against valentinian into my belief system#stuprum babyyyyy! a requirement for every emperor! valens is lacking here so valentinian has to pick up the slack#valens will be giving me an opening to fire shots at figures in christianity i dislike which is honestly better than scandalous sex#later roman empire tag#komiks tag#brother emperors tag#IF. you missed my brother emperors posting. the head in hands thing here is meant to be a little bit offputting on account of#valentinian being valens' imperial maker. that's a life in your hands. overtures of fratricide. etc. you get the point#whatever other subtext you want to apply to it from the subtext spice cabinet. im not picky. this was a quick comic i did#to shake off the depression cobwebs lmao. eventually i'll style guide this era and do comics with more intentional thought later
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omg where'd you get your top it looks like it would fall apart after one cycle in the wash
#i need you to imagine my very specific vision for yakumo piggybacking on eiden ok:#eiden is such a playful lil scamp so idk one day he wants to test his strength by carrying yakumo#yakumo's always carrying passed-out-eiden after marathon sex sessions so. how heavy can a vertical noodle possibly be#but yakumo's scared he's too heavy or that he'll be too awkwardly shaped (whatever that means) for eiden to carry#so while eiden is crouched down in front of yakumo beckoning him to climb aboard#yakumo stiffly positions himself . but . his feet barely leave the ground#and their bodies aren't touching much.. as in#yaku's knees are gripping at eiden's midsection instead of scooching up close#because he doesn't want his crotch right up against eiden's back LOL#and he's very lightly touching eiden's shoulders with his hands#but since yakumo's body is so distant/unevenly perched.. it actually makes it tougher for eiden to carry him#so eiden has to coax yakumo into getting MUCH CLOSER against his body#'come on . right up against my back. it'll make it easier!!'#'no need to be shy đđ'#'that's right! now put your arms around my neck. there we go!!'#after yakumo loosens up and loses rock posture... he indeed becomes easy to carry#so eiden gets to strut around proudly with a yakumo on his back for a bit#this whole thing was inspired by me wanting to see oli bridal carry yakumo LOL#it would be sooooooo easy . oli is sooo strong and yakumo sooo flimsy. just scoop him up. kiss his forehead#tbh he could lift yakumo one handed but the bridal carry is more comfortable and oli is Considerate#then when i had oli AND eiden carrying yaku in my head.. i started imagining the others#something about.... yakumo being tossed around by bottoms#fills me with unprecedented amounts of delight#GARU!! SPIKE HIM ONTO THE GROUND LIKE THE ALMONDBALL#yakuoli#yakuei#yakumond#yakugaru#yakukaru
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WHY ARE YOU SO EVIL!!! /POS. ATTACKING YOU.
Xemnas and Xigbar for 37 if that number hasn't been done? If it has, how about 74?
no puedo pedirle lo eterno a un simple mortal // ay, todo lo que he hecho por ti.
[ID: a mostly black and white drawing with a purple overlay of xigbar and xemnas shown from the hip up on the left side of the image. the background is black and has some diagonal lines with a bit of transparency on the right side. the shadows are harsh, with only a bit of light falling on their faces.
they stand before each other turned to the audience. xigbar, holds the handle and the middle of No Name before him, head tilted down as he looks to the audience. xemnas stands a full head taller behind xigbar, his left hand held some distance below the bladed tip of No Name, his left eye is covered by his fringe.
xemnas visible eye is painted ochre with a white pupil, while xigbar's eye is white and gold. The eyes on no name's handle and the gazing eye on the blade are a vibrant cyan. the caption reads the spanish lyrics "i can't ask a simple mortal for a forever" and "oh, everything i've done for you." /End ID.]
close-up under keep reading.
#capisnotonfire#PUTS MY HAND TO MY STERNUM AND FALLS TO THE FLOOR ON MY KNEES /affectionate#warning to whoever might open the link; there's a slightly suggestive several 'ay's at the beginning porque shakira it's also bass heavy#OBJECTIVELY THE FUNNIEST SONG THAT COULD'VE COME UP. it's the gift that keeps on giving!!#this specific remix's been on my top list... several years; top five for a couple. i've loved it forever. top radio edits ever.#it's basically about a guy that makes up excuses to hide he's cheating and a gal that's fed up with his bullshit and is like. okay. bye.#i briefly considered going with............ right now i know my heart is yours <- in regards to i'm already half-xehanort#as per usual not ship art but it would be HILARIOUS if it was. it would've been able to go so many incredibly funny tragic ways#nano does reqs#my doods#xigbar kh#xemnas kh#IT TOOK SO LONG. putting this out there because i WILL lose my marbles if i do anything more. it's not as polished as it could.#fret not if you've asked for a req i am still doing 'em this one just. kicked my ass (been busy). i tried a couple of things and failed#THEN the file corrupted like 9 hours in and i wanted to die a little (thank the heavens my drawing app has a#thing to get back corrupted files through their screen recording) but i GIVE UP (affectionate)#Does this make sense thematically? Fuck if i know. i forgot all lore (half serious). it looked cooler in my head (jesting)#anyways. mwah tysm for the ask<3#i love posting at mystifying times (i finish at terrible hours and get excited)#described#74
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-â-
#i laughed today and laughed laughed laughed#to the point people were asking me if i was okay#and it was like believe it or not this is more of the me i have always been#just the smallest things setting me of laughing anf crying from it#it felt good and idk what it was or what happened to make it come out today#but its missed bc things most of the time anymore always feel so heavy you know like we're all going through it#but i was thinking a bit ago why i have this energy thats like playful aggression and i recognize it as that like come on come on of#dragging friends on adventures or being so stupidly silly anything to get your friends to laugh#like that optimistic happiness ?#and surely its fleeting and i just want to hold it on my hands for as long as i can bc i really have missed that joy#anyway bring on that parking lot iv fighting i always talk about bc bet its going to be a fake throw of a punch and into a hug#i want to squeeze the number men so hard until little stars are dancing around their heads#anyway i love them and all of you#thanks for being here with me
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ÂŻ\_(ă)_/ÂŻ
#ladies what do you call it after you break up with your gf on friday and then get the flu and covid shots on saturday#brain fog sunday?? mind mashed potato casserole??? physical emotional bach fugue?????#i can't lift either of my arms over my head and my stress-induced TMJ dysfunction haunts me with a fresh vigor you could not even imagine#things feel better but things feel weird and things feel empty but things feel quieter#head feels heavy. feel like i could just sit here staring at my own hands while listening to music for three hours#anyway this isn't a pity post it's just one of the rare occasions where i use this blog as an actual blog#i'm gonna bury this post with some drafts and go take a nap#text#nova shh#personal
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can any susanna clarkeheads help me outđ I was just favourably saying how i think JS&MN does a very acceptable job of not obfuscating how deeply colonialism & racism was woven into the mentality and daily life of regency era england by using a narrator who is very casually orientalist and racist while the actual events of the story challenge those things buttttt then this scene where a fairy takes a black british character to an unspecified north african country and they just stand there judging arab muslims for a while in a way that feels if anything a lot more like modern sanctimonious atheist islamophobia than regency era colonial islamophobia đ and i thought maybe it was going for like "these are just normal people going about their daily life in a normal way but the racist narrator is being orientalist" but i found it pretty hard to support their reading especially when both characters in the scene including a fairy who isn't even aware of the existence of human racism appear to be percieving it the same way................ flopped i daresay
#the ursula k le guin effectđđđ#white fantasy author who is generally progressive about race nooooo#nooo white fantasy author not the obvious distaste for arabs/muslims (for they are interchangeable for you) specifically nooooo#anyway even if it was an attempt to portray that it was a bad one#and in this case i think the difference is that as a white british authorit just would be better to be slightly heavy handed about it#than leave someone w the impression you meant it#bc again im not saying you have to spell EVERYTHING out#the whole dance of 'racist narrator yet not racist book' i assume has probably gone over some ppls heads#but this likeee i was scratching my head...#especially because a significant chunk of your readers would not be looking for a critical take in the first place#theyd just be like yep those ArabMuslims. theyre like that!
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yeah prev kinda fucked me up ngl. read it and was uncharacteristically like damn that sucks anyways back to scrolling. but then i dropped my phone on the table and stared into space for ten minutes there. i dont know man. i guess my secret dream of being the first tboy in the atp kinda took that one personally. not that this is about Me when this is about andrey being lowkey a horrible person. hes sucked for a while but now its just like. yeah okay fuck off manâŠ
#âi was taught to protect womenâ which is crazy; because youre best friends with a known abuser#like transphobia aside. girl if u actually caredâŠ..#ugh. ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.#yeah head in hands he just keeps getting worse. i mean dubai and then the whole zverev thing#and then the constant refusal to accept support to the detriment of literally everything in his life#i have been side eyeing him for ages i mean we all have but yeag.#SORRY FOR GETTING PARASOCIAL WITH IT. MY BAD I SHOULDNTVE DONE THAT#heavy sigh and a firm and final booting of him from the favs list#he was already on his way out but now im actively picking him up and throwing him#i was in too deep with the parasocialness this one kinda hitsâŠ
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like a renaissance painting this is.
#fucking admins va with just back straight. hand on thigh. head turned. eyes wide. watching. observing. seeing.#the mystery woman in almost contrapposto. hand on leg. giving that bit of dynamicism to the whole thing but just at the right amount#the spy is also there#(his hat is reminding me of the the son of man painting)#actually his stance and position right behind the admin is really nice and pleasing to look at cant explain why#i mean its a classic pose very common in paintings and photos and shit#the break in monotony but also the way it offers a nice simply guideline for your eye to move#going from face to face you know#anyway#all of them directing their attention and consequently yours to heavy#showing such emotion with his exasperated yelling#frozen in time so you can really dig into the intricacies of his expression#the fallen angel painting is academic not renaissance but just look at this frame and think of that painting idk#oldtxt#mercs#this whole post was originally gonna be about ellen mc/lain because shes chefs kiss in this shot#heavy and medic are fighting yeah yeah but have you seen (italicized) her?#would it be disrespectful to say shes serving cu-
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i don't think we talk about gant's bigass office organ enough. like what the fuck is up with that. i have several organist friends and from them i've learned that an organ's favorite thing to do is go out of tune recreationally so does he just have a guy to come in and tune it every so often. does he practice in there. can you just hear the overture to phantom of the opera or widor's toccatta through the wall. who PAID for it
#organs are fucking HUGE and heavy and expensive#@ my organist friends thank you for your excellent playing and all the organ knowledge you've shared im using it to attorneypost#turnabout originals#head in hands. why am i thinking about this.
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normally i never make resolutions because im of the opinion that you can change your life whenever you want and technically speaking any day of the year can be the start of a new year. that being said. my past year was kind of garbage.
so! i have decided to be more keen on new years resolutions, especially making ones that will hopefully make me feel better if something i can't control affects me negatively. i actually made a huge list of resolutions, more than i put here, that all kind of boil down to trying out ways to make my life more comfortable and fulfilling for myself and the people around me.
happy new year everybody i hope this year treats us all kindly :)
#new year's resolutions#new year's resolutions 2023#my art#peach stuff#also i know it's a scientific fact that if you write your goals down you're more likely to achieve them#have i ever written my goals down if i wasn't forced to before? no. and maybe that's why ive been so shit at reaching my goals<3#also about the goal that's about finding a hobby that uses my hands: ive realized recently that both of my main hobbies#(reading and writing) are both very brain-heavy things to do. like those are both two things that require a lot Being Inside My Head#and you know! maybe ive realized that it's Not Good to be in my head so much!#so i want to find a more tactile hobby that won't require so much brain time and can connect me more with the physical world#also i drew this all in ms paint with my new laptop and laptop pen and maybe i just don't understand ms paint enough#but this was kind of a bitch to draw. where is the layer function. why was my laptop screen still registering my skin when i was using pen#but still i like how it looks. especially the peach and my hair. the peach just because it looks cute and peach-like#and i think this is the first time ive drawn/colored my hair since i died it this past summer so it was fun to experiment with#how to make it accurate but still cohesive with the colors i already had down#my hair is actually variations on an auburn sort of shade since its faded from a really shitty (self-done) red dye job#but the pink here is fun :)#anyway. that's all
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anyways. finished the fontaine archon quests. and unfortunately the brainrot has hit bc my thoughts throughout it was that should the winds be kinder nameless bard would absolutely adore miss furina (well in chronological order, it would be venti, as bard is already long gone by that point but. auâs are little figures to play with <3)
though venti would love her even more here ,,,
#hi uh. should the winds be kinder is my au#a forced human turned god and human acting as one#oh. oh they would act as her shield so much#the thoughts.#the heavens have bestowed upon you a heavy duty and you are doing amazing. please. at any point you may rest your head upon me#let us not let them dictate our woes even further#i refuse to let them see#AOUGH WAIT I JUST REALIZED LMAOOO#NOT ONLY IS THERE EI AND MAKOTO PARALLELS IN HOW CECIL HANDS OVER THE POSITION TO VEN BUT NOW THERES FOCOLARS AND FURINA PARALLELS#SHAKES THEM ALLLLL#okay well. well. see now i was on the fence abt having cecil be friends w focalors but this opens up so much#sorry this is incoherent đ im still !!!!!!!!#lantern says stuff#should the winds be kinder au#arenât you a human too? wellâŠ. not quite⊠UGH
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bros planking
#bro his head is SO HEAVY you dont understand#cant even stand up most of the time#its incredible#you can just balance them on your hand
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tagged by darling @gremlin-soup for my top five songs Right Now !!
âż Here with Me by d4vd
â Sea of Love by Cat Power
âż Hardlight by Spacey Jane
â Blood cover by Gang of Youths
âż Running Up That Hill cover by The Wombats
taggin @not-nervous-jester @chupacactus @blackbeardskneebrace @blakbonnet @nofeelingisfinall @eye-scream-girls @couriander @skysofrey @smoothedsmoothie @enbiosaur @turtles-on-turts (wonât let me tag u I hope u see this đ„ș) and @creepycute-puppy-gf if yâall wanna play because I am Full Of Love and interaction is!!! scary but fun!!!!
#bonus mention to groceries by mallrat Itâs Fun Itâs Cute Itâs The Vibe itâs been stuck in my head on and off for hours#okay Iâm gonna ramble abt my choices here bc I love oversharing#theyâre in no particular order of Priority#here with me. god. GODDDDDD. ugh. the sounds are gorgeous the best and the tones and the vibes are immaculate I canât help but move and flow#itâs seeping and saturated with love itâs dozey itâs dazey itâs thick with heady sunlight and it tastes sweet and citrusy and it feels like#sharing a melting ice lolly with someone you love and holding hands and watching the sunset and leaning against each other and wandering#hands and lazy kisses and ughhghghhhhh#like when your skins a lil pink and prickly from being out in the sun too long and your lips are a lil dry and tender but kissing still just#feels so soft and thick and heavy and sweet and safe#and feeling the textures of skin and clothes and warm sun and cooler breeze and the smell of each other after being out in the day together#just. together together together here with me#the suns setting and weâre heading home a little achey but itâll be okay#I donât care how long it takes. âas long as Iâm with you Iâve got a smile on my face#sea of love. ugh. itâs sweet. itâs cute. itâs a lil rough round the edges like holding hands with soft but slightly calloused skin. its Love#it feels. real. how it is. like snuggling up together and just dozing in the comfort of having each other#I love her voice I love how itâs a bit rough and imperfect itâs like singing something just for each other#and the tinny twangs and the different layers of sound and underlying sultry indulgence#it feels like being smug and in love and knowing how good youâve got it even if itâs not your usual superficial visually Perfect#it feels like having you and Living and the quiet confident comfort#hardlight. need I say more#itâs upbeat but itâs fuckin heartbreaking#can you see the weight Iâm wearing on my shoulders? each ones worse and stays a little longer#fucked it up againâ Iâm looking alive and Iâm feeling fine#and I love Iâm gonna start a fightâ give me a reason; give me something to bite#blood? the building crescendo and the layers and the twinkling and the hhhhhh#and there is nothing you can do about it now. and the RAWNESS the EMOTION the STUBBORNNESS#do not let your fucking spirit wane. fuck.#Iâve run out of tags HELP I have so much to say!! wombats cover best cover Iâll ramble sometime if anyone asks OKAY BYE#tag game#mercury moments
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