#head heavy in your hand
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Even to just feel the directional pull of another Moon, Planet, or Sun is to feel the void pulling you closer. It's why finding one to orbit, or to even witness orbit at all for that matter is so dangerous. There's no sustenance to cling to out here in the night sky, except for what you can pack, and you have to pack light.
It sure is dangerous when you're dark, deranged, and strange without cause. But in this sense the void can be the factor of orbit that tethers you to any sanity at all.
Yes it's dark and cold out here tonight, and in space nobody can hear you scream. But he who seems delighted in madness, was going to make the most of a scream for bewilderment, and get caught whimpering between the cries of passion, than to face the existential nightmare and dread and that sadly is and has become: my memories.
Hindsight is 20/20, but often leaves all the red flags to looks back on merely as flags.
When we are sad, we seek celebration
When we are on top of the mountain tops, we see degradation
What does that say about me?
Will we keep floating forward through space without cause forever? In gazing upon the beauty of one planet, have we drifted out of their orbit?
Captain's log
Logging off
#maybe ive never been as happy as to when you were stroking my beard#head heavy in your hand#you giggling and making fun of me#thats the nightmare im trying to break#ig#idek if i hate you anymore#but im sure tryna have a better best at this point#fuck#at least im tryna fix that#tf im spose to figure out medicaid with 2 days off#and yall keep having me stay later#got me all the way fucked up#at least ive been trying to fix what i can#even if i havent cleaned like anything#or made my bed lol#tethered to fuckin somethin boi i tell you hwat
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death note is so funny because at bascially no point does the main character consider killing someone by any means other than the death note
"i can't do anything to L because i don't know what his name is!!!" hey how about you kill and shoot him with bullets from a gun.
#juney.txt#or maybe wack him over the head with something heavy.#i know about japanese gun laws but still light you have options here#just write the cause of death for some criminal as ''executed for the crime of Murdering L''#and then strangle L to death with your bare hands
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Anonymous asked: Hello!! For art requests, perhaps some zolu? (Zoro and Luffy)
b0yskylark asked: Splickedy!! Maybe you can draw your favorite One Piece ship?? Personally I think if Zoro and Sanji kissed a lil they'd calm tf down lol
I do find Zosan pretty delightful--LOVE a rivals-to-rival/lovers pairing--and for that matter, Franky/Robin is GREAT and whips ass and both pairings were on the candidate list. But lbr I'm a huge sucker for that captain/first mate intense loyalty "til death do us part and you're not allowed to die" shit. plus Luffy being all but canonically ace means I can bring my no-holds-barred-all-romance-no-sex moirail agenda to yet another pairing which is GREAT for me emotionally. eue
What I'm saying is yo ho yo ho a pirates little late afternoon nap holding hands like otters so I don't drift away for me yar har
#One Piece#Roronoa Zoro#Monkey D. Luffy#Zolu#Splickedydoodles#I just meant Luffy's hand to be hanging down but it DOES look like he's just napping with a handful of titty. and honestly. good for him.#first mate roronoa ''canonically biggest bust size on the crew'' zoro your chest looks heavy can i hold it for you U_U#Listen the way Oda draws bodies is not attractive especially as his art's evolved. sorry sensei art is subjective and so on. but!#I'm looking disrespectfully at the Zoro translated into my art style in my head lmao. Anyway I couldn't bring myself to put a shirt on him#Sorry or you're welcome. whichever applies here lololol
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I got. thoughts. about valens and voices in imperial roman history. but I also got a lot of thoughts about uhhhhhh choosing your brother for co ruling the Fratricide Foundation Story Empire. many thoughts about themistius' oration too
Brotherly Love, Themistius (trans. Peter Heather & David Moncur)
⭐ places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app / insta
#it's also the Incest-Cannibalism Empire but that's a discussion for a different blog#all of the heavy hitters were Incest Empires btw. that's a feature of Empire across all of time. not always Cannibalism tho. TRAGIC.#but rome specifically being the Fratricide&Stuprum Empire is funny AND makes parts of this speech feel. uh. UHHHHH.#feels like you're trying to overwrite history and while you succeeded ONCE the uncle-nephew antagonism with a body count#somehow feels worse????? feels worse. i dont like anything that happened to valentinian 2#anyway. as a result: i personally will be including the bigamy accusations against valentinian into my belief system#stuprum babyyyyy! a requirement for every emperor! valens is lacking here so valentinian has to pick up the slack#valens will be giving me an opening to fire shots at figures in christianity i dislike which is honestly better than scandalous sex#later roman empire tag#komiks tag#brother emperors tag#IF. you missed my brother emperors posting. the head in hands thing here is meant to be a little bit offputting on account of#valentinian being valens' imperial maker. that's a life in your hands. overtures of fratricide. etc. you get the point#whatever other subtext you want to apply to it from the subtext spice cabinet. im not picky. this was a quick comic i did#to shake off the depression cobwebs lmao. eventually i'll style guide this era and do comics with more intentional thought later
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omg where'd you get your top it looks like it would fall apart after one cycle in the wash
#i need you to imagine my very specific vision for yakumo piggybacking on eiden ok:#eiden is such a playful lil scamp so idk one day he wants to test his strength by carrying yakumo#yakumo's always carrying passed-out-eiden after marathon sex sessions so. how heavy can a vertical noodle possibly be#but yakumo's scared he's too heavy or that he'll be too awkwardly shaped (whatever that means) for eiden to carry#so while eiden is crouched down in front of yakumo beckoning him to climb aboard#yakumo stiffly positions himself . but . his feet barely leave the ground#and their bodies aren't touching much.. as in#yaku's knees are gripping at eiden's midsection instead of scooching up close#because he doesn't want his crotch right up against eiden's back LOL#and he's very lightly touching eiden's shoulders with his hands#but since yakumo's body is so distant/unevenly perched.. it actually makes it tougher for eiden to carry him#so eiden has to coax yakumo into getting MUCH CLOSER against his body#'come on . right up against my back. it'll make it easier!!'#'no need to be shy 😏😙'#'that's right! now put your arms around my neck. there we go!!'#after yakumo loosens up and loses rock posture... he indeed becomes easy to carry#so eiden gets to strut around proudly with a yakumo on his back for a bit#this whole thing was inspired by me wanting to see oli bridal carry yakumo LOL#it would be sooooooo easy . oli is sooo strong and yakumo sooo flimsy. just scoop him up. kiss his forehead#tbh he could lift yakumo one handed but the bridal carry is more comfortable and oli is Considerate#then when i had oli AND eiden carrying yaku in my head.. i started imagining the others#something about.... yakumo being tossed around by bottoms#fills me with unprecedented amounts of delight#GARU!! SPIKE HIM ONTO THE GROUND LIKE THE ALMONDBALL#yakuoli#yakuei#yakumond#yakugaru#yakukaru
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Still always looking for ways to use this cardigan in things because I really like all the silly little pictures on it, but it doesn't match with much since it's such a bright pinky kind of color. but is similar to these very fluffy shoes lol
#mori kei#ish... i guess lol#jfashion#ootd#The ancient sparkle tights making a reappearance. I think Ive had them for like 12 years lol#Many of the stones have fallen off and been glued back on#self#oh if only I weren't the most hot natured person on the planet.. so I could actually wear such heavy coat things outside#I mean in daily life I am indeed layered head to toe even in the summer but like.. light layers.#I could NEVER wear a thick sweater or knit cardigan or etc. in daily activities. even in the middle of winter#It can be like 25F outside I will still start sweating if I have too heavy of a coat on.#I don't like being touched without clear notification and permission (no spontanous hugs or etc) since#I just dont like the sudden sensory jarringness of unexpectdly having someone in my personal space and etc#so I really don't make contact with others often at all even people I live with or etc#But occasionally with a close friend or family member our hands might touch for some reason (handing them something. comparing#hand size or color. etc.) and people are ALWAYS like 'wow oh my god why are you so hot?' or like 'oh your hand is so freakishly warm'#lol.. It is I.. the wizard with blood of fire... sadly cursed to never wear cool little cardigans and knit things..#also this is the primary root of my hatred for summer. Putting me in any environmnet over like 65F degrees is like... impossible for me#to stay cool.. .. wintertime my beloved... global warming my BELOATHED
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WHY ARE YOU SO EVIL!!! /POS. ATTACKING YOU.
Xemnas and Xigbar for 37 if that number hasn't been done? If it has, how about 74?
no puedo pedirle lo eterno a un simple mortal // ay, todo lo que he hecho por ti.
[ID: a mostly black and white drawing with a purple overlay of xigbar and xemnas shown from the hip up on the left side of the image. the background is black and has some diagonal lines with a bit of transparency on the right side. the shadows are harsh, with only a bit of light falling on their faces.
they stand before each other turned to the audience. xigbar, holds the handle and the middle of No Name before him, head tilted down as he looks to the audience. xemnas stands a full head taller behind xigbar, his left hand held some distance below the bladed tip of No Name, his left eye is covered by his fringe.
xemnas visible eye is painted ochre with a white pupil, while xigbar's eye is white and gold. The eyes on no name's handle and the gazing eye on the blade are a vibrant cyan. the caption reads the spanish lyrics "i can't ask a simple mortal for a forever" and "oh, everything i've done for you." /End ID.]
close-up under keep reading.
#capisnotonfire#PUTS MY HAND TO MY STERNUM AND FALLS TO THE FLOOR ON MY KNEES /affectionate#warning to whoever might open the link; there's a slightly suggestive several 'ay's at the beginning porque shakira it's also bass heavy#OBJECTIVELY THE FUNNIEST SONG THAT COULD'VE COME UP. it's the gift that keeps on giving!!#this specific remix's been on my top list... several years; top five for a couple. i've loved it forever. top radio edits ever.#it's basically about a guy that makes up excuses to hide he's cheating and a gal that's fed up with his bullshit and is like. okay. bye.#i briefly considered going with............ right now i know my heart is yours <- in regards to i'm already half-xehanort#as per usual not ship art but it would be HILARIOUS if it was. it would've been able to go so many incredibly funny tragic ways#nano does reqs#my doods#xigbar kh#xemnas kh#IT TOOK SO LONG. putting this out there because i WILL lose my marbles if i do anything more. it's not as polished as it could.#fret not if you've asked for a req i am still doing 'em this one just. kicked my ass (been busy). i tried a couple of things and failed#THEN the file corrupted like 9 hours in and i wanted to die a little (thank the heavens my drawing app has a#thing to get back corrupted files through their screen recording) but i GIVE UP (affectionate)#Does this make sense thematically? Fuck if i know. i forgot all lore (half serious). it looked cooler in my head (jesting)#anyways. mwah tysm for the ask<3#i love posting at mystifying times (i finish at terrible hours and get excited)#described#74
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🧡 thank you for all of the love. glad you like the warren so far!
thank YOU for the absolute bangers, just chapters of increasing unsettling vibes I LOVE IT!!
the warren
#i am late to things as always#i hope u dont mind me going thru your blog alkjhflskgdfhk#idk how to say it...but you word perfectly the type of vibes Price have#its like....he has the way of giving you commands that felt less like orders and more like inevitabilities - like its unyielding and#u just gotto nod your head and listen to it even if you know sum is very fucked and very wrong#he's sweet when he wants to- its comforting that makes you feel at ease but its sticky...its dark and heavy- its not 100% soothing#the kind of gentleness that makes you question if you're actually safe or you're being lulled into compliance#THATS the Price i like seeing in some fics AND YOU ABSOLUTELY NAILED THAT VISION#making reader feel valued yet vulnerable all at once...one hand keep you close and the other ready to pull strings into you when its time#i genuinely cant wait to see how the fic turns out and reading other people's reblogs and theories was so cool#LOVE YOUR STUFF!! hope you're having a good day/night :3#i'll stop yappingdskgjhsdflkjfghlfaks#ask response#thanks for the ask <3
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-☆-
#i laughed today and laughed laughed laughed#to the point people were asking me if i was okay#and it was like believe it or not this is more of the me i have always been#just the smallest things setting me of laughing anf crying from it#it felt good and idk what it was or what happened to make it come out today#but its missed bc things most of the time anymore always feel so heavy you know like we're all going through it#but i was thinking a bit ago why i have this energy thats like playful aggression and i recognize it as that like come on come on of#dragging friends on adventures or being so stupidly silly anything to get your friends to laugh#like that optimistic happiness ?#and surely its fleeting and i just want to hold it on my hands for as long as i can bc i really have missed that joy#anyway bring on that parking lot iv fighting i always talk about bc bet its going to be a fake throw of a punch and into a hug#i want to squeeze the number men so hard until little stars are dancing around their heads#anyway i love them and all of you#thanks for being here with me
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#i hold you high and your heavy words break over my head.. a dotted ''i'' is crammed down my throat ☹️#i hold you high and i'm a target for your bombs it's not your fault all i know to do is lift with these hands it's not your fault..#music#karl blau
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yeah prev kinda fucked me up ngl. read it and was uncharacteristically like damn that sucks anyways back to scrolling. but then i dropped my phone on the table and stared into space for ten minutes there. i dont know man. i guess my secret dream of being the first tboy in the atp kinda took that one personally. not that this is about Me when this is about andrey being lowkey a horrible person. hes sucked for a while but now its just like. yeah okay fuck off man…
#‘i was taught to protect women’ which is crazy; because youre best friends with a known abuser#like transphobia aside. girl if u actually cared…..#ugh. ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.#yeah head in hands he just keeps getting worse. i mean dubai and then the whole zverev thing#and then the constant refusal to accept support to the detriment of literally everything in his life#i have been side eyeing him for ages i mean we all have but yeag.#SORRY FOR GETTING PARASOCIAL WITH IT. MY BAD I SHOULDNTVE DONE THAT#heavy sigh and a firm and final booting of him from the favs list#he was already on his way out but now im actively picking him up and throwing him#i was in too deep with the parasocialness this one kinda hits…
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like a renaissance painting this is.
#fucking admins va with just back straight. hand on thigh. head turned. eyes wide. watching. observing. seeing.#the mystery woman in almost contrapposto. hand on leg. giving that bit of dynamicism to the whole thing but just at the right amount#the spy is also there#(his hat is reminding me of the the son of man painting)#actually his stance and position right behind the admin is really nice and pleasing to look at cant explain why#i mean its a classic pose very common in paintings and photos and shit#the break in monotony but also the way it offers a nice simply guideline for your eye to move#going from face to face you know#anyway#all of them directing their attention and consequently yours to heavy#showing such emotion with his exasperated yelling#frozen in time so you can really dig into the intricacies of his expression#the fallen angel painting is academic not renaissance but just look at this frame and think of that painting idk#oldtxt#mercs#this whole post was originally gonna be about ellen mc/lain because shes chefs kiss in this shot#heavy and medic are fighting yeah yeah but have you seen (italicized) her?#would it be disrespectful to say shes serving cu-
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i don't think we talk about gant's bigass office organ enough. like what the fuck is up with that. i have several organist friends and from them i've learned that an organ's favorite thing to do is go out of tune recreationally so does he just have a guy to come in and tune it every so often. does he practice in there. can you just hear the overture to phantom of the opera or widor's toccatta through the wall. who PAID for it
#organs are fucking HUGE and heavy and expensive#@ my organist friends thank you for your excellent playing and all the organ knowledge you've shared im using it to attorneypost#turnabout originals#head in hands. why am i thinking about this.
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anyways. finished the fontaine archon quests. and unfortunately the brainrot has hit bc my thoughts throughout it was that should the winds be kinder nameless bard would absolutely adore miss furina (well in chronological order, it would be venti, as bard is already long gone by that point but. au’s are little figures to play with <3)
though venti would love her even more here ,,,
#hi uh. should the winds be kinder is my au#a forced human turned god and human acting as one#oh. oh they would act as her shield so much#the thoughts.#the heavens have bestowed upon you a heavy duty and you are doing amazing. please. at any point you may rest your head upon me#let us not let them dictate our woes even further#i refuse to let them see#AOUGH WAIT I JUST REALIZED LMAOOO#NOT ONLY IS THERE EI AND MAKOTO PARALLELS IN HOW CECIL HANDS OVER THE POSITION TO VEN BUT NOW THERES FOCOLARS AND FURINA PARALLELS#SHAKES THEM ALLLLL#okay well. well. see now i was on the fence abt having cecil be friends w focalors but this opens up so much#sorry this is incoherent 😭 im still !!!!!!!!#lantern says stuff#should the winds be kinder au#aren’t you a human too? well…. not quite… UGH
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listen ‘ere boy there is a voice in ur head telling u ur fine and you don’t need to go to therapy tomorrow and that voice is a f u c k i n g liar don’t listen to it boy don’t fuckin’ listen to that rat ass bastard it does NOT have ur best interests at heart
#vent in tags etc etc#aim losing my mind over here#it’s fine#see the thing is I’m so deeply lacking in like. the emotions edition of object permanence. I can have a massively heartbreaking reaction to#smth and then once I’m out of that moment and even slightly distracted it’s like nothing ever happened ??#so like yk I was nearly [radio static noises] over talking to my therapist abt the young csa thing and I’m meant to be starting emdr tomorr#tomorrow* except like for the past two weeks I’ve overall been fine regarding that?? instead it’s the ed and other traumas flaring up so ??#idk how Specific emdr is I honestly don’t know much about it yet but like yk now I’m wondering if I should delay starting that in favour of#talking about the other badtimes tm rearing their heads atm. todays in particular was unexpected it happened this morning and it’s only just#like. hit me and started biting and it’s ?? also dumb cuz like on one hand I’m pretty okay but on the other hand the other half of my brain#is spiralling hysterically to the point where I’m very glad I’m already in bed and like I know [redacted] won’t help but it’s like my brain#is just so lost about how to hold these things and what to do at all so it’s just pulling out the bad coping mechanism and insistently#thrusting it in my lap and waving its arms like it wasn’t even That Bad tm of a situation today but it Was some very specific factors which#are holding hands with Other specific factors and then The Location Of The Events is just#yea okay maybe I will talk to her abt this / these things instead if I can#ah the joys of heavy personal responsibility at a very young age and the severe guilt that gets bred from that and the fantastic experience#of things being so far out of your control and almost destined to fail and the absolute wonder of The Actual Person(s) To Blame Having No#Consequences For Their Actions and ending up feeling like you failed and you’re a complete fraud cuz no good you do will make up for that#one situation and yeah okay I’m gonna go sleep#ugh
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good morning! i just put a.khos on the f/o list!
#had to happen eventually hehe! I've fallen head over heels for my biggest enemy and i love him sooooo much!!#ash rambles 💚#i had a pretty eventful weekend#went out of town and on a shopping spree! twas very fun and i ate lots of yummy food and the such#i'm home now but so.. tired... cant bring myself to get out of bed just yet BAHAHAHA#i keep thinking about a.khos' arms around me keeping me close to him#i had a kinda creepy interaction with a man in public the other day and although i'm ok and safe#it was the first time that had happened to me and i'm still sorta shaken up#im ok!!! but i keep thinking about f/o comfort and the such just to help some more. i'm completely safe and doing so much better than I was#you see... theres this character... i don't love him. i think he's a horrible man. but he's so hot i start questioning things about myself#and my s/i for that source is a known flirt- so i wouldnt put it past them to have gotten it on a few times#but i've been thinking... what if theyre actually bitter exes? maybe that's why my d.mc s/i hates serious relationships so much..#but that aside. this character wears this heavy coat and i keep thinking abt using it as a weighted blanket!! it looks really really cozy#sir you're an asshole but... give me your coat!!!!! (grabby hands)#oh also! me being home means i got to see a.qua plushie!!! i missed her!#but yeah. that's what's up. so much goddamn a.khos brainrot.#he's stolen my heart#and don't tell anyone i said this but...#i love it. i love it so much. no better feeling than me being his and he being mine#also i've been thinking about my xb1 fankid a lot as of late.. but if i start rambling about Nalia we'll be here all day LMAO#but yeah! hope everyone is doing well! i'm doing okay too#ALSO AJDHWJEHW SO MUCH S.KYRIM ROT!! I LOVE R.UNE BY THE WAY AJDJAJS I#I HAVE BEEN DOING SO SO MUCH S/I WRITING FOR THEM#ALL OF THE THIEVES GUILD ARE MY BEST FRIENDS BTW#also did i mention i got to visit one of the largest bookstores in the world? goodness i love books soooo much!!!!!!!!#but also... reading next to a.khos.. enjoying that comfortable silence..#(swoons) what a man
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