#he's careful to go when either nagato/konan/yahiko are working

[padmerrie]

the hazards of going to your local bookstore....

bookends au

[tsukuyomii45]

ObiKonan. Tell me how they would meet and get together if Obito returned to Konoha after Rin died and went back to the clan. You don't have to go into detail on how that would work plot wise...like about Madara, Zetsu, etc. I'm curious about them. He's going to be with someone not from the clan. Will they even last?

I honestly envisioned this AU working out in one type of way: in which Obito would've been the Hokage, or the right-hand of the Hokage, while Konan is the ambassador of Amegakure (Nagato would be in charge, Yahiko would've been long gone, etc.)

They would surely meet by chance - either in a summit with the minor hidden villages, or in a meeting between one another in order for both villages to establish diplomatic ties, a peace treaty, and a trading agreement.

So they would have to meet up more often and maintain contact directly, which means that they would get to know each other further beyond their professional relationship.

Konan would learn that he too, is an orphan despite being from the elite Uchiha clan. She'd learn that he too, lost someone dear to him - one whom he loved so dearly because of the world's cruelty, and has not known any other type of love since.

These similarities allows their bond to grow, and they would build an emotional connection with each other - that connection would in turn build the thrill of being with someone so new and so unique. One thing that honestly tugs them closer is how they both have a vision for a peaceful world and how they're working hard to make that happen, even if it means dealing with a lot of shitty political affairs.

Of course, this newfound, strange friendship Obito built with the one who is known as "Lady Angel" in Amegakure, a powerful S-rank ninja who is also stunningly beautiful would end up developing into a romance between them - a romance that felt so strange, so new, so wrong yet so right - because he was from an elite clan, and she had to grow up fending for herself.

Now the thing with the Uchiha Clan, they're not against it if a man marries someone that is outside of their clan - unfortunately, it is different when an Uchiha female marries someone from outside the clan (see Izumi Uchiha's parents). So there wouldn't be much resistance, but there will certainly be a lot of wariness in terms of bringing an "outsider" into the family.

But Obito was never the type to care about what the clan thinks of him - they never cared when he struggled and they called him the black sheep of the Uchiha Clan when he was merely a young boy with average skills. He can easily resist any objections to their relationship - and that's more than enough for Konan.

Would they last? It depends - is Konan willing to live in Konoha while maintaining her occupation as an ambassador of Amegakure (just like Temari)? I'd think she will. They can last, yes - because they technically cannot get enough of each other; they're two strangers, almost from two different realms, and yet they've come to understand each other in a way where they ended up needing one another by their side; without fearing that they would lose each other to the cruelty of the world.

[sukirainbow]

[+18 Fic] Accidental Frictions

Fandom: NARUTO Rating: Explicit - 18+ Content Pairing: Nagato x Yahiko x Konan Characters: Nagato, Konan, Yahiko Content: Alternate Universe, Canon Divergence, Not Canon Compliant, Explicit Sexual Content, Trans Konan, polyamory, sexual encounters leads to them finally figuring shit out Word count: 6259 - 5 chapters, complete work Summary: Nagato is happy that Konan and Yahiko seem to have started a relationship, although a bit jealous. But whoopsie, a little incident after an akatsuki meeting between Yahiko and Nagato might shake things up and destroy what was built… Or maybe not?

I like the idea of two people who have the hots for each other finding themself on top of each other and just going 'fuck it... might as well get steamy' so I wrote it and just expanded on that. These three deserved all the good sex in the world.

Chapter one under the cut (explicit), read the rest on AO3

Chapter 1: The Fall

Nagato was a bit zoned out during the Akatsuki meeting. Thankfully, nothing much happened this week so he didn't miss any crucial infos.

He was lost in his thoughts, thinking about his friends Konan and Yahiko. He knew they kissed recently, and that they've probably been making out much more when Konan was taking care of Yahiko at home while he went out for a walk. It was a conscious move on his part, as he was happy for his two friends and was ready to help them as much as possible to help their romance bloom. His two good looking, nice and cool friends really belonged together, they got along so well.

Nagato wasn't completely deaf to his own heart's feelings about all this though. It pinched a little. He was also very interested in Konan before they started kissing, but he had never personally dared to express these feelings because he knew he had less charisma than Yahiko. He always knew in a way that they'd end up together. Yahiko was much stronger physically, with much more muscles and way manlier. He was more handsome than him and braver too. In fact he wasn't exactly insensitive to Yahiko's charms either. He knew his heart desired them both but he silenced those feelings. Even more so now.

The meeting finished and the members got back to their occupations, home or on the field. Konan let her housemate know that she had to go pick up something with two other girls from Akatsuki and that she'd go directly home then.

Yahiko and Nagato stayed in the meeting room, putting away the maps and letters. Nagato sat on the edge of the table to rest his recently hurt ankle, still in his thoughts. Yahiko finished putting away what he was carrying and looked at him. He was wondering why his friend looked so absent these days.

“Nagato, are you feeling alright?”

“Hm? Yes, why do you ask?”

“You seem... Thoughtful, and silent.”

“Oh you know, I've always been the silent type compared to you.”

“Right. How's your ankle?”

“Better. Like the medics predicted, no big deal I'll heal quickly.”

Yahiko started walking toward him to keep talking with him. He tripped on the little step that surrounded the table and started falling down. Nagato got up to try and catch him, which he managed but his ankle still being a bit painful made him flinch and he fell back against the table, lying on it. Yahiko was lying on top of him. The position was a bit awkward as Yahiko was laying on him, right between his spread legs. Yahiko stood up a bit but not completely, standing on his hands over Nagato, staring at him.

“I'm sorry I slipped…”

“It's okay, I'm okay.”

“.... Nagato, this position is very awkward…”

“I-I know…”

“We're like, tightly squeezed against each other.”

“Mhm…”

“I think my dick's right on yours."

“I know... I feel it too.”

Nagato was expecting Yahiko to get up and free him anytime now but he stayed there, fixated on his eyes. He was already blushing but the prolongation of this pose made it worse. Being so close to Yahiko, feeling his breathing on him, their crotches pressed against each other, his heart was racing and he knew it was only a matter of time before he got hard. That was the case for Yahiko too.

“Oh we're so tight that we're getting hard…”

“Y-yeah, as I said, I feel it too.”

Yahiko slammed his hands closer to Nagato's face and leaned closer over his face, he felt that he also thrusted his hips toward him. In a warm exhaled breath, the ginger pronounced his name with desire.

“Oh Nagato…”

He started to thrust his dick against Nagato's in a rhythm, breathing loudly. Nagato was unable not to react. The desire he felt for Yahiko rose suddenly, like how his dick got hard, and he accompanied his movements by moaning and moving his own hips. Still he was worried someone would catch them.

“Y-Yahiko... This is- people could see…”

“No... The room's going to be empty for a little while, if we're quick then no one will see.”

“Y-Yahiko... Oh Yahiko!”

They kept grinding on each other with intense desire, both guys being extremely attracted to the other. Nagato was struggling to keep his moans at a reasonable volume to not attract attention, gripping on Yahiko's sleeves.

Sadly for him he didn't have to attract anyone as an unfortunate bystander was stuck spectating the audio part of the show. 

Kyousuke was still in the bathroom next to the meeting room when these two fell. Having just finished washing his hands when they fell on each other, he was then trapped as there was no way he could escape without them seeing him. He had no wish to catch them in an embarrassing moment, nor to stop them. So he stayed hidden and had no choice but to hear them grinding on each other. He knew these two were to kiss at some point but he never imagined he'd be stuck in the bathroom as these two fucked on the strategy meeting table. Kyousuke regretted deeply not choosing to pee at his own place instead of here after the meeting, hoping they wouldn’t last long.

Yahiko slowed down and put his hands down to his crotch. Nagato looked at him mortified of embarrassment, thinking Yahiko was about to undress and have penetrative sex with him. Not that he disliked the idea but he'd rather that didn't happen there, where Akatsuki members could barge in anytime.

“Y-Yahiko what are you?? We don't have time. If someone walks in-”

“I know... I'm just pushing down my pants a bit. I want to feel you more against me.”

Nagato blushed even more, and shyly asked.

“Can you... Do the same for me then?”

Yahiko nodded and pulled down his pants, pushing them down to his knees. Yahiko got back on him, adjusting the position for the best grinding angle and started thrusting again. The sensation was even more intense and Nagato felt like his climax would be coming soon. They grinded some more before Nagato gripped on Yahiko's arms and asked out of breath.

“Y-Yahiko, can you kiss me?”

“Nagato…”

“Please kiss me, please please please!”

Nagato was on the edge of orgasm and thrusting as much as he could on his partner. Yahiko pressed his lips against his as he got very reinvigorated by his friend begging for it, and quickly their mouths connected to each other and their tongues embraced. It wasn't the cleanest first kiss in the world and some saliva spilled.

Nagato hugged tightly on Yahiko and ejaculated against his friend's cock, who soon did the same, as both moaned each other’s name.

They stayed like that a bit, catching their breath and looking lovingly at each other. Yahiko got up, pulled back Nagato's pants and then his own. Both didn't dare to say anything, they really wanted to but didn't know what to say after such a thing happened between them. Yahiko decided to just flee the situation, and waved bye at Nagato.

“Yahiko wait-”

But it was too late, he jumped from the balcony to an unknown destination. Nagato sat back on the table, his legs still shaking a bit. His feelings were all mixed up in his heart, he didn't know what to do. Then he suddenly felt overwhelmed by guilt. He just had sex with Konan's boyfriend. He stayed there lost in his thoughts then decided to go back home.

Read it on AO3

[captnjacksparrow]

Hey. So when do you think Sasuke realised his true feelings for Naruto? I feel like he knew since part one itself, in some way at least. He was aware of something. When Sasuke tells Naruto his body moved on its own, I feel like there were seeds of realisation or at least a trigger point. In Shippuden, he always seems like he is fully aware of his depth of feelings for Naruto, he gets super emotional because of it. The fact that he is driven to ask Naruto again and again about his feelings, and is disappointed except for chapter 698 proves that he knew this feeling was somehow different, and he wanted understanding from Naruto, maybe to validate his own feelings, since he is equally inexperienced if not oblivious like Naruto.

He knows deep down that Naruto is special to him, he adores Naruto privately, he had since before the genin days. At the end of vote 1, I think he realises it fully, his true feelings for Naruto. What do you think?

Wonderful Ask, Anon!!! 😍😍😍. 

[[Lengthy Post ahead]]

WHEN DID SASUKE REALIZED HIS TRUE FEELINGS FOR NARUTO?

I am damn sure, like 100%, the moment he realized his true feelings is when he thought he was going to die and recollected all the memories he shared with Naruto (including the Accidental Kiss and Roasting Sakura for insulting Naruto) for one Last Time in the Land of the Waves Arc.

You might be thinking now, "What makes you so sure?"

Well, Kishimoto just hammered into our faces in many plotlines.

How is this panel has to do anything with Sasuke?, You may ask.

The answer is here.

"You will realize what you are, as death comes to embrace you".

Itachi, no matter how cold he acted before Sasuke in that battle, he simply couldn't keep up his Evil Brother act at the final moment of his death.

He just smiled. That is who Itachi really was and always will be for Sasuke.

Again, you may ask, 'All this happens much later in the series, Kishi might've had a different mindset back when he was drawing part 1'.

You are right. But Kishi's mindset was the same all the time. He even established this 'True face before Death' theme very strongly in Land of the Waves arc itself.

This is who Zabuza really was. He didn't treat Haku like a Tool. Infact, his final words were, "I wanted to go the same place as you".

Kakashi made sure to convey this message to Haku in the War Arc, when he fought with the Edo Tensei'ed Haku and Zabuza.

And there are many characters who died in this series. Almost all of them projects their true feelings before their death. Just rewind the deaths of Nagato, Yahiko, Konan, Obito, Madara. You might've noticed that there won't be any lies. For Example, Obito. When he died for the first time, he was really thinking about Kakashi and Rin. He even said, ‘I wish I could’ve spent more time with them’. That’s who Obito really was. He was convinced with that Tsukuyomi plan because he wanted to live in a dream world where Rin and Kakashi will be with him happily. 

So, a person, at their final moment thinks only about all their memories shared with that 'precious' person signifies only one thing. That person must have unconditionally loved the one they thought about.

Sasuke realized that he loves Naruto at that moment and he had no regrets because he smiled before falling into Naruto's lap.

And I always wondered, 'Why did Sasuke thought only about Naruto? Didn't he have any other good memories other than the ones he shared with Naruto?'.

Well, this goes way back when he was just 8, right after the Massacre. Yes, the chapter 698 confession. But I am not going to attach all the panels here as I will go in-depth about it later in this post.

However, there are three panels that provides the general gist of what Sasuke felt about Naruto, the whole time.

Happiness:

Whenever Sasuke watches Naruto, he reminded him of his family and it made Sasuke 'felt relieved' or 'feel warm and fuzzy'. Simply put, Naruto's presence made him happy.

And did Sasuke ever felt relieved?

Yes, he did!!

This above scene happens sometime after the massacre and yet, somehow Naruto could make him smile even in that distressful situation.

And this is one recurring feeling which Sasuke experience whenever he comes in contact with Naruto. After the Massacre, somehow Naruto became his source of happiness or relief. This panel right after massacre, that smile before his ‘supposed’ death, on seeing the Great Naruto Bridge with a relaxed smile, VoTE2  smile.....  

Sasuke smiled at all these scenes and you know the reason why!!!

Weakness:

This is exactly opposite from how he felt earlier. And this conflicting thoughts are what Sasuke was battling in his mind throughout Part 1 and Part 2 until Chapter 697. He liked Naruto's presence. But, For him, the very thought of bonding with him made him feel weak. 

According to Sasuke, the stronger he bonds with someone the more he has to worry about losing them and the very thought of losing them will put him in a precarious position which is considered as a weakness. And Sasuke doesn’t want to experience this again. 

Meaning, Sasuke doesn’t want to feel the pain of loss over someone, ever again. He wants to be the person who don’t care about anyone.

Did Sasuke ever expose his weakness?

Yes he did!!! 

This is his absolute display of weakness and this is what he always wanted to avoid. The very thought of something is going to happen to Naruto made him do something that put him under immense pain. 

Yes, In his mind, he doesn’t want to care about anyone’s loss. But his body doesn’t seem to listen to him. And that’s why his body moved on it’s own.

God!!! This made me cry!!!!

Pain:

Now, this feeling Sasuke had towards Naruto was very evident in the War Arc. That one time he sensed Naruto’s Chakra in Konoha and asked Orochimaru to hurry up. Also when Naruto was bawling after seeing countless shinobi’s deaths, Sasuke’s reaction changed from ‘I don’t care 😶’ to ‘How dare you😠’, I consider all these moments where Sasuke was bothered about Naruto . But since, I want to focus only on Pre- Land of the Waves moments, I’m not going to add those moments here.

Did Sasuke felt pain in Part 1?

Of course, he did!!!

Well, I always consider this scene as something ‘very personal’ for Sasuke. 

In this post, I’ve written about how chapter 3 is masked by the ‘Accidental Kiss’ as a comical facade but when you analyze it deeply you will find that Naruto and Sasuke’s rivalry thing goes long back, even before the series started.

After hearing Pinky’s insensitive comment, what Sasuke did here was completely extreme. He was just giving her a ‘Murder Stare’ which was way too extreme for Naruto, if he was just a teammate. When in reality, Naruto was not just his teammate. That’s why I think Sasuke was bothered by this insensitive comment and roasted her because he knew Naruto was suffering from this loneliness ever since he saw him when he was 8. And when someone made fun of his loneliness, Sasuke just couldn’t keep quiet. 

Isn’t this some form of feeling pain of the person you care about and standing up for them?

This is another scene which I don’t have to go in detail about. 

On my first watch, I always wondered, ‘Why Sasuke was making exceptions for Naruto? They just know for a very few days and yet why was he giving his lunch and standing up for him, which he doesn’t have to in the first place? It’s just 2 episodes in and Sasuke has already made 4 exceptions, why was he doing this?’

But after watching Episode 478, I came to the realization that Sasuke did all these because he knew about Naruto before the series even started. 

It’s funny that before this scene, Sasuke was giving his long-ass serious speech to Pinky about how he is an avenger, he was crying at that time, he wants to get stronger than someone and wants to kill him, he can’t waste his time here..... And yet when he saw Naruto suffering from Hunger, he just gave his lunch without minding the consequences. (Ninja Career says Hello!!!!)

Now, Let’s get back to my previous question I posed here, 

Why did Sasuke thought only about Naruto in his final moments? Didn't he have any other good memories other than the ones he shared with Naruto?

The answer is, ‘Sasuke always felt any one of the three extreme emotions such as Happiness, Weakness, Pain in the presence of Naruto. And all these 3 extremities are not something you feel for everyone unless that person shares your blood or the person you love unconditionally. Sasuke, at this point has no one that shares his blood plus the only blood relation left was the one he wants to kill. And since Sasuke thinks he is going to die, he doesn’t mind thinking about his happiest moments with the person he considers as ‘precious’ , because somehow Sasuke considers Naruto as ‘His Person’ or you can say ‘a part of himself’’

And that’s why I think Sasuke realized his true feelings just when he was about to die. 

At the end of vote 1, I think he realizes it fully, his true feelings for Naruto.

I had this same thought before, anon!!! But after multiple re-watches, I realized something else. You cannot realize your true feelings and say a painful ��Good Bye’ at the same time.

Realizing true feelings works only in two ways,

You either say a ‘Good Bye’ to someone. After leaving that person you may realize you miss that person and eventually you may come to term with your feelings.

Or

You already have a strong feeling established in your heart and say a painful ‘Good Bye’. And VoTE 1 belongs to this category.

Simply put, Break ups and Love realization cannot happen simultaneously.

And that’s why Sasuke casually said, “To me, you’ve become my closest friend” without any hesitation. Because he already knew it otherwise obtaining Mangekyou Sharingan (MS) will not be possible if you don’t have such a strong feelings established already.

That whole battle started off as a way to obtain MS but then it changed into his desperate attempt to cut off his bond with Naruto to become stronger and only killing him can sever it because it’s such a strong one. It’s not a bond that will be severed by saying a simple, ‘Thank you’.

At this moment, Sasuke must be realizing he simply cannot cut off this bond and he is again making an exception by letting this one weakness to exist and embracing it by being closer to him for one final time.

And this is one of the hauntingly brilliant way of conveying A Connection indirectly. And the best part is... this scene is not accidental. We know Sasuke felt stinging pain in his arms and knelt down & coughed up blood. How did he end up straight above Naruto’s face?

It’s because Sasuke simply wanted to convey his unbroken bond with Naruto by deliberately leaning towards his face. Rain falls on Sasuke and all those droplets passes through Sasuke’s face and falls upon Naruto’s face or it is very possible that Sasuke might by crying and his tears might be touching his face, but either way, it creates a Connection which he couldn’t able to cut off. In the fillers, Sasuke’s sweat drop falls on Naruto. It’s almost similar to how at the end of chapter 698, both of their blood connects together to form a connection. Which means only death can separate their connection.

That’s why I feel that this is the moment where he is painfully saying his Good Bye for one last time, it pains him immensely because he already knows that leaving his ‘precious’ person who became a part of himself is not very easy added to that he hurt him so much during the battle. And for this reason, Sasuke felt ‘leaving Naruto is like ripping off half of his body’.

He knows deep down that Naruto is special to him, he adores Naruto privately, he had since before the genin days. What do you think?

Sasuke always fights this inner battle within himself. Mind Vs Heart & Body. 

His mind says, ‘No more Bonds. Just stay alone. That will save you a lot of pain’.

His body says, ‘Create Bonds. Feel Relieved’. 

When Sasuke met Naruto near the lake pier, His body wins the battle and that’s why he smiled back at him despite the trauma he went through few days earlier. This is when Naruto became special to him.

When Sasuke attempted to make friendship with Naruto. His body wins the battle and that’s why he offered food, trained along with him.

When Sasuke died for Naruto by casting away his dreams, his body moved on its own.

At the beginning of VoTE1 battle, his mind said, ‘Leave Naruto. Pursue your dreams by treading in a darker path by filling your heart with hatred’. His body said, ‘Be with Naruto. Achieve your goals by filling your heart with Love’.

By the end of VoTE1, Sasuke came to the conclusion that he really couldn’t sever his bond with Naruto, no matter how hard he tried. That’s why his body moved on its own and ended up straight above Naruto’s face for one last time. Carrying all the heart break of a painful breakup, Sasuke treads towards the darker path. For the very first time, Sasuke’s mind won the inner battle. And he was extremely saddened by it.

Throughout Shippuden, Sasuke mostly listened to his mind and whenever he does, he was seen pushing Naruto away like leaving with Orochimaru, ramming chidori through Naruto’s Shadow Clone when pursuing Itachi, promising to kill Naruto before Attacking Konoha, wanting to fight with Naruto in VoTE2.

But whenever he followed his heart, you can see scenes like Sasuke occupying Naruto’s personal space in Orochimaru hideout, Sasuke smiling at Great Naruto Bridge, asking Obito about Kyuubi (Naruto) when he joined Akatsuki, stopping his rampage on seeing Naruto’s eyes under The Bridge, asking Obito to wait and listened to Naruto under the Bridge, sensing Naruto’s chakra in Konoha and getting concerned about it, prioritize saving Naruto over everyone in the War Arc, switching off Sharingan at the last moment. These are all the moment where Sasuke’s heart was winning over his mind.

And finally at the end of VoTE2, Sasuke happily claimed, ‘I lost’, meaning, his mind which always asked him to cut the bond with Naruto lost to his Heart and Body which always wanted him to be with Naruto. And when Sasuke felt that he was unconditionally loved by Naruto who was willing to share his pain, Sasuke cried happily and finally sealed his Bond with Naruto.

But anyways, I still get this question, why do Sasuke had to battle his feelings for Naruto like a lover? And why Naruto had to act all Tsundere towards Sasuke for most of the Part 1 if only they are friends!!! Like Shikamaru was never shown to be acting tsundere towards Chouji or Naruto. Or Obito was never shown to battle his feelings towards Kakashi!!! Itachi was never shown to be obsessed about Sasuke all the time. Or Hashirama was never obsessed about Tobirama either. Like we were shown many fraternal bonds, friendly bonds throughout the series. And yet why none of those bonds fits for Naruto and Sasuke? 

Well, this post is not the right place to cover these questions and I am simply going to leave it at that. 

Sasuke realized it very early and that’s why he decided to push Naruto away by the end of Part 1. Whereas Naruto truly realized his feelings at the end of Part 1 and decided to put himself close with Sasuke in Part 2 and finally confessed in VoTE2 that, ‘Remember, you once gave me your food during the Bell Test? It’s because you simply can’t tolerate to watch me suffer before your eyes.... I also feel the same way about you.. I simply cannot see you suffer alone when you were willing to give your body to Orochimaru... It just hurt me a lot inside’.

They finally realize the feelings they had for each other is a love in a broader sense which cannot be labelled under a certain term (it may include a father, a mother, a friend, a lover too) and we can call them as Pure Soulmates, where one cannot live without the other, where one cannot bear to see the other one suffer and they always wanted to be standing next to each other sharing their happiness and pain in their hearts. 

[animeyanderelover]

It's some Akatsuki time, so what would happen if Obito, Pein, Konan, Sasori, Itachi and Deidara encountered their childhood friend/crush after going missing-nin?

Finally I get to write something about them!

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, delusional thinking, paranoia, threatening, blackmailing, kidnapping

Meeting childhood friend after going missing-nin

Obito Uchiha

🔥Obito’s childhood friend must have been someone similar to Rin, meaning that they supported him and encouraged him even though he acted sometimes like a fool. But at that time he had his huge crush on Rin and only saw the s/o as a precious friend to him. Rin and them were probably even good friends themselves.

🔥Obito has some trust issues after seeing how Kakashi killed Rin so when seeing you after so many years again he didn’t know how to feel exactly. But as mentioned in the basic Hc’s for him he’s also pretty paranoid. You most likely didn’t recognize him because of his mask and change of attitude, but he recognized you. How could he forget the only person, besides Rin who had supported him?

🔥Surprisingly he didn’t kidnap you then and there because as mentioned he has trust issues and was unsure about how to feel. But he couldn’t kill you either so he just let you live, deciding to watch you at first. He needed to know if you had changed.

🔥But you hadn’t. You were still the supporting and caring person you had always been. This world hadn’t ruined you yet. And that’s when his paranoia kicked in. What if someone would hurt you? What if you would end just like him? What if the people you thought you could trust would kill you? All this crushing thoughts led him to kidnap you as soon as realizing that you still meant a lot to him.

🔥Obito doesn’t even has to be romantically obsessed with you when kidnapping you. He was at first just scared that something would happen to you and you would be taken from him just like Rin. I think he would get over time romantically obsessed with you because you are similar to Rin. He would probably even think that Rin herself sent you to him so someone would watch over him.

Pain

🌧I think his darling was friends with Yahiko and Konan and met him during the war when Konan brought him home to them, meaning that they also trained with him and the others with Jiraiya and there’s a good chance that they also were some of the very original Akatsuki members. So I think it’s possible that Nagato thought they were dead after the whole incident with Danzo because Tobi killed the members who wanted to help the three and the darling was under them and somehow survived.

🌧There is no day that passes by where Nagato doesn’t grieve over Yahiko’s death and the same counts for you. But he has at least Yahiko’s body left, but he and Konan never found your corpse. So when you suddenly appeared alive in his village he lost it. You on the other hand didn’t even notice that he was there at first. When you did it was too late.

🌧Pain kidnapped you then and there. What do you expect him to do when seeing the person he thought he had lost forever standing healthy in front of him? He’s on the paranoid side and knowing that you were still here drove him over the edge.

🌧He and Konan were both so relieved to see you again, to have their childhood friend again with them. You on the other hand were very confused to why they were acting like this and to what had happened. And they told you everything that had happened. Both of them wanted you by their side, but both of them also agreed that they couldn’t risk losing you. So you weren’t allowed to work for them. Or leave the tower you were kept in.

🌧Pain doesn’t have to be in love with you. Just the knowledge of having someone again with him who he thought was dead and who he grieved over for years is enough to make him a Yandere. But he might have had a small crush on you back then and the more he spends time with you, the more his feelings turn into something deeper. In such a scenario I can totally see Konan being a Yandere too, probably not romantically interested, but still.

Konan

🤍It would be the same like with Pein. Her darling, Yahiko and her were fighting during the war for their life together, later on joined by Nagato. The storyline would be pretty much the same. She saw you at that time as her best friend since she probably had a crush on Yahiko at that time.

🤍She probably saw you before you did. Konan was probably currently checking on the village when she saw you again. And at first she thought that she was seeing things. She was suspicious if you were really you and watched you for a while, wanting to make sure that it was really you. Konan also told Nagato about this, telling him that there was someone who looked just like you.

🤍And as soon as Konan realized that you were indeed her supposed-to-be-dead friend she instantly kidnapped you. Poor woman had already lost Yahiko and had thought for years that she had lost her best friend as well.

🤍Many things changed, she knows that. Nagato was just as happy as she was when hearing that you were indeed alive and back with them. It was like some part that they had lost years ago had suddenly returned with the knowledge that you were still under the living. And none of them is willing to take the risk to lose you ever again.

🤍Just like with Pein she doesn’t have to love you before to be a Yandere for you after finding out you’re still alive. But that can change, especially since so much years have passed by. There were some signs that she had feelings for Yahiko so I feel like if her darling was before especially close to him and also shared some similar character traits she would project the feelings she had for him on them. But she of course also loves you for you.

Sasori

🦂I feel like he would have to hold his childhood friend in a really high position in order to not kill them later on. His darling must be someone who he respects highly and who shares something with. So they probably also have a huge interest and fascination with puppets or are at least interested in some other sort of art. It’s also important that they were already really close to him before he lost his parents because he closed after this his heart. I think he would have to have some sort of small crush on them beforehand and already viewed them at that time as beautiful.

🦂Sasori is most of the time in his puppet and hates wasting time so he probably met you when he was on a mission and was fighting some shinobi. I feel like he has to see his darling in action and has to see some talent in them in order to acknowledge them enough to not kill them. He had seen you already seen you in his childhood days as someone pretty, but now that you were grownup he felt like you were the most beautiful thing he had ever layed his eyes on.

🦂Sasori was confused with why you suddenly plagued his thoughts so much as well as the fact why he felt something. He had let you live out of respect, didn’t he? So why was he watching you? Why was he following you whenever he had time? Sasori needed to sort his feelings out at first and watched you.

🦂But after admitting to himself that he was in love he kidnapped his darling, planning carefully and drugging them since he has a lot of medic knowledge. This was new for him since he thought he had perfected himself to not feel anything. But here you were, stirring long forgotten emotions up in him he thought he had burried away.

🦂Sasori needs to hold some sort of admiration and feelings for you beforehand or else he would just kill you and make a puppet out of you. For now he still has to learn how to handle this new discovered feelings he has for you. And there’s also a lot to catch up between the two of you and he is by any means curious about what has happened in your life during the time he was busy with other things. Now that he has officially gone mad for you he won’t even hide that he worships your body and uses it as a preference when making new puppets.

Itachi Uchiha

🍡Due to his father being a bit obsessed with power and the clan his darling has either to be an Uchiha themself or someone who is really talented, smart and strong. Itachi has a really busy life so I feel like someone who would just try to do normal things with him that every child/teenager in their age does would help him since he trains most of the time. In order to form later on an obsession with them he needs to have romantic feelings for them beforehand.

🍡Itachi is known as a traitor in the Leaf Village for killing his whole clan and discovered you probably on accident. It doesn’t have to be in a fight. Itachi knows that you’re strong. You might just sit somewhere in the forest or in a small crowed shop. That is all it would take to give him flashbacks and make him feel very lonely since both of you used to be very close. He would hide himself so you don’t see him. He knows you most likely hate him.

🍡Itachi wanted to look if you were doing alright at first. He wanted to ensure you were doing fine. But he didn’t leave even after knowing you were doing good. He stayed, watching from the distance. Seeing you brought warm memories back he had once shared with you. Watching you still acting with the “Enjoy your life, it’s yours!” attitude brought him back into how everything used to be.

🍡It takes some time for Itachi to become obsessed with someone so months might pass before he finally makes his move. He felt ashamed when he kidnapped you, using a genjutsu on you to minimize your resistance.

🍡Itachi knows that you have every reason to hate him. He kidnapped you and left you without any trace. Since you’re close to him you’re naturally also close to Sasuke and when he already left the village at that time you have even more reasons to blame him. But Itachi is a patient one. He gives you time to adjust before telling you the truth about what really happened.

Deidara

💥I can totally see that Deidara already had a huge crush on his s/o before he went missing. Similar to Sasori his darling has to be interested in some sort of art as well so he has something to talk about with them. The best would be if his darling was interested in the same sort of art he is. I feel like when they were young he was a huge show-off and already saw himself as his darling’s protector.

💥I feel like the ideal situation for him would be if he sees his darling when they’re in a tricky situation, a fight for example, and he helps them. He is a delusional Yandere and this would strengthen his belief that he is indeed your knight in shining armor.

💥You just poured fuel to his delusional mindset with letting him save you. He doesn’t even think of it as kidnapping. He just does it to protect you. Surely you’ll understand that, right?

💥Deidara is very open with his obsession with you and expresses very openly his feelings for you. He views you as a masterpiece and just like when he was young he would continue trying to impress you by showing you what he can do.

💥This boy was already in earliest childhood days in love with you and that didn’t change very much. But his delusions have gotten stronger since then and he sees himself as your protector. From all the people on his list he’s the most obvious one to express his love for you. Through praising you daily, having always some sort of physical contact with you or blowing every person up he thinks of as a threat.

[ladykissingfish]

A Date with an Angel // Part Three // Sasori and Itachi

Sasori

“Do you like this place? It’s really colorful, isn’t it?” “It’s alright.” “These nachos are delicious. Do you want some?” “No thanks, the cheese would upset my stomach. I’m mildly lactose intolerant.” Konan just sighs to herself and picks her drink back up, slowly sipping as she tries to think of a good topic for conversation. Earlier, when the redheaded house member Sasori had invited her to spend an evening with him, her surprise had been greater than with any of the others so far. When she’d first been introduced to the household back when she moved in, she’d taken one look at Sasori and had been shocked; later on she sat in Nagato’s room and demanded to know why he was employing children to do the type of work that they did. “Children?”, he’d responded, shaking his head. “Sasori is no child; he’s 35 years old. He’s older than me and you, even.” 35?? With his short stature, smooth, unlined face and vibrantly colored hair ... it was simply unbelievable. The more she got to know him, however, the more she realized that he was indeed very mature; maybe too mature. He never smiled, never laughed, and made even less conversation than Kakuzu did. Whenever Konan made meals, he never joined any of the others at the table. “Don’t worry; it don’t have anything to do with you or your cooking,” Deidara had told her one night when she questioned it. “The guy just never eats. Hardly sleeps, either. It’s like he’s not human or something.” Considering his quiet, serious personality, his choice of venue to take Konan to tonight was entirely odd. “A comedy club?”, she’d asked, as he guided her through the doors. “Mm. They’re amateurs but really quite good. I’m sure you’ll laugh a lot.” And laugh Konan did — but not Sasori. His facial expression didn’t change once all evening, and he didn’t so much as crack a smile through even the most hilarious of acts. Now it was the interlude between sets, and Konan was trying to find something, anything to make conversation about. Before she can, the next guy comes on. It’s a man with a small dummy that he sits on his knee, that “tells” the jokes for him. Konan happens to glance at Sasori and is startled; for once, he seems interested. His eyes stay fixated on the little wooden toy throughout the man’s set, and when he’s done, it’s the first time that Sasodi cracks any kind of a smile. “Are you a fan of ventriloquism?” Sasori turns towards her, and unleashes more words than she’s heard him say in the entire time of living at the house. Sasori is gesturing, he’s vivid and animated as he explains the process of creating dummies and puppets, and the finer points of ventriloquism. “I didn’t know this was a hobby of yours.” He raises an eyebrow, and tells her it goes far beyond a hobby. The show is over so he takes her back home, and brings her straight to his room (which she’s never seen the inside of before). She gives a little gasp upon entering; Sasori’s shelves are filled to the rafters with various wooden constructs, some unfinished, some painted, some clothes, some with hair and jewelry and —

Konan goes to pick up a smaller one laying on a bench, gently turning it this way and that. “This is so realistic,” she says, softly. “I wish I had the patience for creating art like this.” “What do you mean? Your art is amazing as well.” She blinks when he says that; surely he’s not referring to — “I’ve been in awe of your origami for quite some time. The things you create are very beautiful. I’d love it if you could teach me your technique sometime.” Konan blushes; nobody except Yahiko had ever complimented her origami hobby before. She sees a piece of paper laying on his desk, and begins slowly folding and teaching him how to make a basic flower. After observing and asking questions, he’s able to replicate the simple lotus. She then asks him if he could walk her through the process for creating one of his pieces, which he does, from sanding to sculpting to painting. “Things like this are better than humans,” he tells her, quietly, at one point. “These you can create, and you can control. But you never really know what a person is thinking, or feeling, or what they’re going to do next.” At the end of it, Konan glances up at the clock on his wall and gasps: 1am?! Where had the time gone?? She gets up and thanks Sasori for (what turned out to be) a lovely evening. He hesitates, then takes her hand and gives it a light kiss. “You are welcome to come back any time you wish,” he says, as he walks her to his door. “I’m a night owl so if I’m not out on a job, I’ll be awake and working.” She nods, smiles, then returns to her own room. Before she falls asleep she thinks of another flower to teach him: the campanula. These bright blossoms offer beauty, and intricacy ... and are a symbol of new friendships.

Itachi

“Oh my Goddd.” “What’s wrong, Konan?” “Nothing; it’s just, I haven’t felt this relaxed in a while. Itachi smiled and took a sip of his lemonade, before answering, in his quiet way, “Me, too.” When Konan had been approached by the dark-haired Itachi earlier in the day and asked if she wished to spend some time with him that afternoon, she’d been excited. Itachi was somebody that mostly kept to himself within the house; always quiet, very soft-spoken but when he DID speak he always said the most profound things Konan had ever heard. He was one of the most calm and mature members of Nagato’s team, an Konan’s shock upon discovering that he was only 21 years old was immense. One night she went into the kitchen to cook everyone a meal, and was pleasantly surprised to find Itachi there ahead of her, doing prep-work for the dish she had said she was going to make. From then on, the two developed a slow, lovely friendship, punctuated mostly by them cooking together and occasionally watching a movie in the living room. Today however was the very first time she went anywhere with him in public, and she was nearly flabbergasted when they pulled up to a well-known luxury spa. “This — Itachi this kinda stuff is expensive. I can’t let you —“ but he just waved her off, took her inside, and told the lady behind the desk that they both wanted “the works”. A slow, soothing full-body massage, manicures and pedicures, eye and hair treatment, mud masks, as many desserts as they wanted (Itachi especially seemed to have a thing for the sweet dumplings), and now, a hot tub. “I wouldn’t have thought a guy would be into stuff like this,” Konan commented, reaching for her sweet tea. “Man or woman, everyone needs the chance to relax, don’t they?” Konan nods, and then says “Well I’m sure that all of you that work for Nagato do. But me? What am I doing that I deserve something like this? MY job isn’t nearly as stressful, and —“ “You take care of all of us. You’re there for us. That may sound simplistic, but that’s no small feat, my dear.” The two are quiet for a while, listening to the relaxing nature-esque background music of the spa, before Itachi says, quietly, “If — if you ever feel like talking about HIM, you can talk to me. I don’t know if you’re ready but I want you to know I’ve experienced loss, too.” Konan closes her eyes; while she appreciates Itachi’s kindness, she’s NOT ready to talk about Yahiko. So she asks instead, “You lost someone close to you?” He nods, faces her, and tells her the story about losing his parents in a car accident when he was 12. His voice wavers when he tells her that they were coming home from a parent-teacher conference for HIM, and how, for the longest time, he blamed himself for their deaths. “Me and my younger brother Sasuke were taken in by my older cousin Shisui,” he explained, now smiling. “Nice guy but definitely not father material. I guess it’s just the Uchiha curse; you lose someone and have to go to someone else. It happened to me, to Obito —“ Konan stops him, and is REALLY surprised to learn that Itachi and Obito are distant cousins. “But anyway, I just want you to know I get it. If the day ever comes when you want to talk, I can be there for you.” She scoots over in the water and hugs him; she blushes when she realizes her towel has slipped, and for a brief few moments their bare chests are touching. “S-sorry about that,” she says, backing away and covering up. “Don’t worry about it,” he replies; but he’s blushing quite hard as well. The drive home is quiet, each feeling comfortably invigorated and relaxed. When they get to the front door, Konan leans up and kisses Itachi’s cheek, thanking him for a lovely day. He tells her that she made the day even lovelier. They go inside and all of the boys make it a point to go up to Konan and tell her how great she looks after her day of pampering, which she appreciates. She goes into the kitchen to start dinner, and once again finds Itachi there ahead of her. She smiles and ties on her apron, and the two create another delicious meal together.

[naruto-littlespace]

Akatsuki Littlespace Headcanons

I could and probably will write more, but I don’t feel like it right now, so here’s this.

Disclaimer 1: Littlespace, in the AU and in real life, is a coping mechanism for everything from everyday stressors to psychological disorders like PTSD. If you sexualize littlespace do not interact with this AU or me, I will block you.

Disclaimer 2: Littlespace in this post is slightly different from in real life, magic-ed up in a similar way to how ninjas are magic-ed up in the Naruto universe. Chakra-using littles actually revert to the size they were when they were their little ages, although they retain any bodily changes since then (little Kakuzu still has stitches, little Deidara would have hand mouths.) The exception of course is Sasori, whose body is manmade and doesn’t change. People also do not necessarily remember their big lives when they slip into littlespace, sometimes becoming confused about where they are and who they’re with. They will sometimes be confused about what time period they’re in as well, believing things to have happened that hadn’t happened yet in their little age but were far in the past in their adult age.

This isn’t how I’m going to treat littlespace w/ Naruto characters all the time on this account btw, it’s just an idea I’ve been playing around with, like the psychological defense of reverting to a childlike state inadvertently triggers a transformation jutsu to match.

Nagato:

Little age pre Yahiko’s death was 6-7, post is 2-4

Started regressing shortly after the formation of the original Akatsuki. She and Yahiko had to do research to figure out why their teenage friend had suddenly turned into a child, but after they learned they took care of him: treated him like a child, bought him kids books from the local thrift shop, tucked him into bed. He called them uncle and auntie.

He would stay in littlespace for a surprisingly long amount of time, for 4-6 hours on days between missions.

After Yahiko’s death he spent many days in a row regressed to age two. Konan scrambled to take care of him and handle her own grieving. After that was over he promised her she wouldn’t have to take care of him again.

Nowadays of course she still takes care of him when he regresses, but he tries to force himself out of it if he begins to.

He still has board books and stuffies, so if he does fully regress he’ll have one of his pein bodies bring them to him.

Being ~3 he doesn’t have the mental capacity to control all the Peins, so they just kind of idle for awhile.

Konan:

Little age is 3-5

Pre modern Akatsuki she didn’t like regressing at all and only did it involuntarily. She would handle it by either walking it off or reading Nagato’s board books by herself.

This continued pretty much until she started becoming friends with Kakuzu, who openly admitted he was a little (he thought she should know, in case it ended up delaying his missions--it was mostly so she would stick up for him to Pein. No, he wasn’t hunting bounties, there’s a perfectly logical explanation--)

So she had a bad day while she and Kakuzu were at the same base and went ‘can you please deal with me for a couple of minutes’ and he was like ‘ofc’ so she sat down in front of him and shrank down to a little girl and started crying. He picked her up and bounced her on his knee until she calmed down. She ended up staying little for a couple of hours because Kakuzu took her out of the office and telling her stories about his childhood while they prepared dinner.

Kisame becomes her caretaker too when the three of them start dating.

Sometimes she starts crying inconsolably about something she won’t talk about other than someone leaving her and something being unfair. Pein showed up during this one time and said he knew what she was talking about and it was none of her cgs’ concern which ofc made them concerned but they haven’t gotten the chance to talk to her about it.

Itachi:

Little age is 2-4 but since her chakra is often very low so she doesn’t always physically become that tiny.

She didn’t regress until after she joined the Akatsuki, but when she did Kisame wasn’t surprised. He reintroduced himself as her babysitter, slipped her a lollipop and took her to a library to pick out some kids books.

Loves to be pampered. Oh god it’s the only time she can relax at all

Wears reading glasses because they can’t get her in to an eye doctor appointment

She’s trans in this au because I say so

Likes playing with weasel and crow toys, esp when her caretaker (usually Kisame, Konan and Kakuzu as well when they’re around) plays the weasel and she’s the crow. She’ll tell stories where they go out to the woods to train or just hang out.

She loves to sit in laps <3

She eats a lot more in littlespace than out so whoever’s feeding her makes lots of food. For her to grow big and strong u know

Kisame:

Little age 0. He is just baby

Being reminded of the bloody mist triggers his littlespace, though he has to be in a bad headspace in the first place. It really does not happen often.

Post Akatsuki the first time he slipped was after he, Kakuzu and Konan started dating. Kakuzu woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of crying and woke Konan up immediately afterwards because holy sh*t there’s a baby in our bed!!

It was Kisame. Kakuzu picked him up and rocked him back to sleep. Konan asked how he was so good with kids and he was like ‘oh I had a baby once.’ She does not ask him to elaborate. Kisame wakes up as an adult the next morning.

They keep a container of powder formula for him if he regresses but won’t get him a pacifier because they’re afraid he’d bite off and choke on the teat. They have bottles but Kakuzu makes the nipples for them out of one of his threads on the spot bc he’d bite through literally everything else with his tiny demon teeth.

Sasori:

Little age is unclear (unlike some of the others, he’s never said it.)

Signs he’s in littlespace: stops talking, stops walking if he can afford it, walks unsteadily and a little bowlegged if he can’t. Stops using ninjutsu and if he’s near a kitchen he might try to eat despite not having a digestive system anymore. Has been known to ask where Granny Chiyo is. The answer is ‘back home.’

Deidara got him a pacifier and a coloring book. He does use them but not when anyone else is watching, not even Deidara.

He is a bit upset when he’s reminded that his body is wooden. He would like to feel things please. But he learns to just enjoy the sensation of squishing a stuffie and his jaw chewing on a paci.

Deidara:

Not actually a little. He just hasn’t gone through sh*t like the rest of the Akatsuki have, and has coping mechanisms for when he is having a bad time.

He caretakes for Konan when her boys aren’t around and for Sasori if he’ll let him.

Hidan told him about littles after Kakuzu regressed in front of him and thought Deidara might need to know because of how much baggage Sasori has (he doesn’t know what it is but he can smell drama)

So he looked out for Sasori becoming a kid and learned instead to look for him not acting like an adult. He walked out of Hiruko and tried to eat in front of him and Deidara had to tell him he couldn’t have a strawberry because it was bad for his health and not because it would probably make his insides mold. It’s weird but Deidara is also weird and he makes it work.

Kakuzu:

Little age is 9-10

Post Akatsuki the first time he regressed was in front of Hidan in the middle of the woods. He didn’t recognize him and immediately tried to run and then beat him up when he chased him. Hidan had to think fast and tell him he was his new neighbor and pretend to be taking him home. The next time he was babysitting.

Sometimes asks where his husband is. The first time Hidan heard this his response was ‘what the f*ck’ and Kakuzu told him that was a bad word.

Enjoyed activities include reading, sparring, and to the surprise of some, hunting. He’s not bad w/ a bow and arrow.

The best way to keep him in/make him feel comfy in littlespace is to make him a meal. U can let him help to the extent that he sets the table or pours the drinks or smth (because he will ask) but take care of the food for him, because he hasn’t had someone else handle that for him in a long time.

Regressing isn’t necessarily a common thing for him to do but he’s one of the only ones whose regression can be triggered by physical pain as well as emotional. He can usually harden his skin to block attacks but if he doesn’t in time he may turn into a ten year old. It actually can surprise an opponent enough for Hidan to be able to take them out.

Hidan:

Not a little either.

Knew about littles bc there was an old man in his village who had ptsd from some long forgotten war and sometimes turned into a six year old.

Caretakes for Kakuzu pretty exclusively, unless Kakuzu is big and taking care of someone else, in which case he’ll help out if he’s feeling nice at the time. Itachi is actually his favorite to take care of because Itachi is a very manageable child.

Obito:

Little age varies wildly from about 1-11. He blocks his physical regression because he regresses Often and doesn’t want to blow his Madara cover.

He has been regressing since p much immediately after he got crushed. Madara was really having none of it and went from patiently waiting for him to become ‘big’ again to pretending it wasn’t happening, forcing Obito back into a uh. ‘’Normal’’’’ headspace

The Tobi act is actually covering his littlespace though when he’s an adult he has no idea how to realistically act like a kid so when he’s actually a kid it’s kind of jarring for all involved

When he’s a baby he just screams. Not really crying in distress but screaming because he can

He’s so eager for attention. Please talk to him! Play toys with him!!! Read a book, eat dango, run around outside, catch bugs, train!!!

Never mentions Kakashi or Rin but sometimes will mention his grandma or Lord Fourth as if he is the current Hokage

[catboysuigetsu]

some akatsuki farm things (part 1)

The living arrangement goes like this: Hidan slept on the first floor on the couch until it got cold in the winter n he started sleeping in Deidara’s room, Dei, Itachi and Kakuzu are on the second floor, and Kisame sleeps in the attic

Nagato owns the farm and he, Konan and Yahiko live in a spooky Southern mansion down the road

Sasori takes the stuff (cow milk, goat milk, chicken eggs, the occasional animal) to market. Their house is a bit of a drive away but it has this big old shed for their puppets and sometimes Dei will go over and do art w/ them

Dei cannot drive. The other ppl (Kakuzu, Kisame, Sasori) inconsistently try to teach him how to drive the truck and the tractor but Hidan’s not allowed to

Hidan has 5 goats he inexplicably found in the woods. Their names are Kabob (small and white), Dinner (medium sized, brown and black), Linner (waist-tall, mostly white w/ brown on either sides of his face, looks oddly wise) and Roast (small, black and white) (names via @thatshipcat <3) and the last one was Stew (waist-tall, brown and black, full curled horns) until she head butted a hole through the front door and got renamed Little Jashin.

They have cows and a few chickens in a coop close 2 the house. Itachi almost solely takes care of the chickens bc he doesn’t trust anyone else w/ them. He has trained the local crows to protect the chickens from anything that wants to eat them or their eggs.

Deidara has been a horse rider for a long time. He showed until he started high school and then decided his horse were more impt than school. He stole it from the farm and ran away up the coast 2 find another farm that would hire him. The name of his horse is either C4, Katsu, or something else?? Vote Now on Your Phone

Dei and Hidan very quickly became besties. They goof off more than Kakuzu would like but Kisame is happy 2 pick up the slack because he’s happy to have their good energy around him

Kisame has a chow chow named Samehada who helps herd

Kisame has been working there the longest. He’s old friends w/ Itachi, who only worked summers until he quit college and started living on the farm full-time. that’s when they got the chickies

Kakuzu and Hidan have some mysterious past together that led them 2 both work on the farm. Hidan is v good at the manual labor stuff and Kakuzu is too but mostly Konan likes him bc she was falling behind in paperwork as Nagato’s health declined. He showed up and helped get the farm back on its feet basically

Zetsu works in various places in a town nearby including the grocery store, town hall, the morgue, and a strip club. Few ppl in the main cast (or anywhere else) know that they hold all of these jobs.

Obito doesn’t show up until later but he’s here too.. lurking...

[dokuhebi]

❛ you know me. nothing i like more than breaking rules. ❜

The Witcher 3 Sentence Starters // @peepingtoad​ Wooden walls struggle to keep the winds at bay, struggle to stay silent as each gust slams against the boards like a fist, causing them to groan and creek in protest. Between the cracks of the windows, the gaps between the floorboards and walls, trickles of that frosty wind can surely be felt. Continuously blowing out the little candle the serpent had set, for the lights had short circuited hours ago. Still, for every little flame that died, the serpent would patiently light another. Leaning over and blowing a small and precise little fire back on to the top. Gathered with them on the couch was Konan, mimicking their sitting position without their notice. Her young eyes having trained on their more elegant posture that mixed so well with a lazy edge, yet never lost regality. They have welcomed her inquisitive presence, letting the child lean against them to examine what it is they hold. An old tome, one they had read many times. But not yet read in this time line, hopping the boarders of realities in search of their deceased friend. It made finding new things to read quite tricky, when they had already indulged over seventy years of life, and mused over books both presently here and ones that were yet to even be written. So it serves to have her curiosity beside them, where they can explain concepts, facts, sentences. Where they can educate her on the things most would gloss over while reading. Yet all the same, they are ensuring a careful balance. Teaching what could serve her, but would not prove a hazard if she ever did end up turning traitor on Jiraiya. The serpent isn’t quite arrogant enough to think they can lead anyone out of the darkness, if this girl finds herself back down that road, they are the very last person capable of changing her mind. For now however, they sit rather peacefully with the child, a slender digit running along the sentences they feel she ought to pay closer attention to. Leaving her to work out why they had underlined such information, and pleased when she so quickly deduces the answer. Her eyes light up at the reward of light praise, her hands kept busy with the folding of an origami swan, something she does without thought. Until Jiraiya entering the room has stolen all her attention, and she has placed that little swan as if in a token of appreciation for their lesson, in to their hand, and scrambled from the couch to him. Sharing words the serpent doesn’t quite catch when their attention moves instead to catching the paper bird. Neatly gathering it in their palm for brief inspection, before placing it on the far side of their candle to avoid any flame from ruining it. Although the man had seemed to keep his usual and convincing grin for while talking to Konan, the moment the girl has run off to greet Yahiko, they can see the faltering of his expression. Enough for them to close their book, and place it under the swan. Their full focus upon him when they sense the disturbance. Only to be told of news that they have the greatest feeling was due to their meddling with time. That Konoha shinobi were patrolling for enemies in the north, in a small town known for its rare jewels. One that the serpent knew would be swept right off the maps rather soon. It had been a passing comment they made around the three children. When the conversation of rare items had been brought up at dinner the previous night. Where the serpent had mentioned this town, when they had joked it likely wouldn’t be around by the next winter. Konan had expressed some dismay of never seeing the items the viper had mentioned there, and as it would turn out, Nagato would take it upon himself the following morning to go and collect her one. To locate this prize possession before the serpents lighthearted prophecy came true. But it was no guesswork on the dark haired Sannin’s part. Konoha had seized that town overnight, and Nagato would be locked within the town along with all the citizens. An orphaned boy, an obvious shinobi with eyes more valuable than any gold in that town. “To infiltrate a Konoha siege and assist a prisoner out of its barricade won’t be looked at kindly,” the serpent says, knowing swiftly that if Jiraiya was aware of where the boy was, and what a grim fate awaited him, he would be rather swift in departing on a rescue mission. But the serpent doesn’t merely know that town falls, and violently so, but they know precisely which shinobi are deployed. They know the sensors there, they know the Hyuga, they know that if Jiraiya enters those walls, he will be seen, and if he is seen, his lawbreaking would be reported to the council. ❛ you know me. nothing i like more than breaking rules. ❜ His words cause their eyes to narrow for a moment, a piercing glow that may put to shame the little candle dying out in the drafty abode, “it is not breaking a minor rule Jiraiya. It’s treason.�� But what good would come off telling him the dangers? What dangers would he ever not place his body between in the name of saving those he loved? Had he not taken blade after blade for them? Had he not fled Konoha the moment the serpent had in their past? Chasing them in the hopes of bringing them back home, or bringing them back from the evil they had walked in to, they had birthed. So it is all they can do to tell him to at least discuss a plan, asking him to wait for them to assess the situation and find the best and safest way to get the boy out. A lie. For while he waits for them for what must be an agonizing sixty minutes, they had already departed to the sight. They can’t stop him from coming here eventually, they can not explain why they know what they know, they can not explain the necessity of anything they know not by heart, but by insidious insight. But there is one thing they can do. They make the quick decision that they refuse to see their friend, their beloved, branded a traitor because of their own error. No. He could stay kind, for so long as he stayed behind them. For so long as they bore any evil, any unspeakable acts, and let him continue to be their light, and the light for so many others, in interminable darkness. By the time Jiraiya would realize the viper wasn’t coming back with a plan, he would be too late to prevent their decision. He would arrive to see a burning city, but a very much in tact city. He would arrive to find a cloaked figure standing beside a much smaller figure. A boy with brilliantly red hair. He would find a small armies worth of bodies littering the battlefield, all sporting slashed up Konoha headbands. The citizens of that town would praise a faceless hero, unaware it was one of the legendary Sannin. They had known Jiraiya would be unlikely to agree to slaughtering women and men who had fought alongside him in the war, shinobi simply doing their duties. But Orochimaru had known that if he hadn’t, if one of these sensors caught the signal of chakra so familiarly his, he would be the one placed on potential deaths row. His life over a thousand, over a countries, over the worlds, it is a price they were willing to pay. They don’t expect him to see it that way however, they don’t expect him to consider this something endearingly sentimental. Only outrageously violent, impulsively wrathful. He can’t possibly know what they know, he can’t possibly feel the weight of it. They send Nagato ahead, as they move like a wraith over the bodies, each one carved in to by jutsu very much attributed to Kirigakure shinobi. With that being a large enemy of the Leaf at the moment, it seemed an easy veil to drape over this mess. To let the ambush be seen as warfare from a nation already waging that battle across various other lands.

“That child will be the death of you.” Their comment is muttered quietly, solemnly, but he can’t hope to know the weight of those words either. Nor will he the next sentence that falls from their lips between the bite of a snarl, “I didn’t come all this way to watch you executed Jiraiya,” they say, unable to express just how far they had really come, unable to explain how losing him had already left a laceration across their heart the refused to have reopened, that this price was small, when every one of these shinobi was bound to die not even a month later anyway. Blood is channeled through mud as the rain creates small tunnels and indents in the soil. Washing it around Jiraiya’s feet, allowing it to run darker and deeper in to the serpents clothes. They are without a scratch, not a kunai landed. No doubt the sensors had sensed the viper approach, no doubt each and every shinobi had greeted them with a sense of feeling safe in their presence. One of the legendary Sannin, which warrior wearing their matching headband would have felt anything different? “I won’t lose everything again,” the hiss to their voice does not burn out, as if accusing him of carelessness, when they are the one carrying needless seeming red, “I won’t lose you.”

[inrainprose]

I wish you would write a fic where... Orphan Naruto gets to meet Nagato and Karin and finds out they’re from the same clan so because they have no more family they build a familial bond with each other. Basically an AU where Yahiko was never killed and the Akatsuki remained a peaceful organization lol

Inspiration struck, thank you for that! Hope you’ll like it, and you can all send me more.

cross-posted on ao3

“That wasn’t part of the plan at all!” Yugito exclaimed, and despite her cool and collected exterior, her eyes were ablaze with fury. In these moments Yahiko didn’t feel much of a leader at all.

But he still was.

“I know, okay? Things got a bit… out of hand.”

“Out of hand? Out of hand?”

“Yugito!”

Startled, they turned to Nagato sitting in a corner of the room. Yahiko could count on one hand the number of time he had heard his friend raise her voice like this, especially against Yugito.

“You’re scaring him,” he said simply, voice soft, face betraying nothing. He had been focusing on his young charge still bundled up in his arms, but he was also paying close attention to the conversation.

Konan rested a light hand on Yugito’s shoulder, and the woman’s anger melted away as she breathed deeply, making an effort to school her feature, if only for appearance’s sake. Yahiko couldn’t begrudge her anger – she was just worried, and rightly so. The situation had gone out of hand indeed.

“It’s done now,” he said, placating. “We just have to run with it.”

Quite literally – they had run their fair share in the last few days, covering the distance from Konoha to their main headquarter in record time. Especially counting their newest – and smallest yet – addition to the group.

There was no going back anyway. Just the way Nagato was clutching at the tiny boy, it was clear that turning back was not an option. Nagato was quiet, and he seldom voiced his opinion, but that didn’t mean he didn’t have one. And on that matter Yahiko suspected that it was quite a strong one too.

“What is it?” Nagato murmured, oblivious to any others when the kid stirred in his arms. A mop of bright blonde hair peeked from the blanket he was bundled in.

“I don’t wanna cause trouble,” came the tiny, tiny voice. Yahiko’s heart broke a little.

“You’re not,” Nagato assured, and it wasn’t true, it was causing them troubles big time, but it also didn’t matter.

“I shouldn’t have yelled,” Yugito admitted. “I’m sorry. You’re not at fault, Naruto.”

Hearing his name made the boy come out of his hiding spot for good to cast curious looks at the people gathered around him with his big, shining blue eyes. What a strange bunch they had to be in a child’s eyes, with their matching coats and weird eyes and all kind of facial features and hair. Naruto had never left Konoha, and hadn’t seen even much of that, so it had to be quite the novelty.

He wasn’t scared though. He wasn’t worried, not even a little, and that was maybe the best and the worst about it. He hadn’t questioned it, when Nagato had told him they could take him away, if he wanted.

“Are you my long-lost brother? Have you come to rescue me?” he had asked.

It appeared that little Naruto dreamt of various family members or unrelated heroes appearing out of nowhere to sweep him away, give him a home and a life. In the end he had been right to hope.

“No. But I’m… I’m an Uzumaki, like you. We’re from the same clan.”

The awe with which Naruto had whispered “clanmate”, something he had to have witnessed all around him in Konoha but could never experience for himself – Yahiko would remember it for the rest of his life.

“We’re cousins,” Nagato had said, decisive like he rarely was, natural shyness and clumsiness falling away in front of the boy’s desperation and loneliness. “We belong together.”

To think, they had gone to Konoha to be liked.

Running away with their jinchuuriki had probably put quite the damper on that plan.

“So I can… Can I stay?” the boy asked, cautiously hopeful. And really, even hardass Yugito wouldn’t be able to say no to this voice and face. That boy was freaking adorable.

“You can. If you want to,” Nagato said, never one to impose anything.

“I want to!” Naruto exclaimed, springing up to his feet to perch on Nagato’s lap, grabbing a fistful of his cloud-patterned cloak to keep his balance as he stared, undisturbed, into Nagato’s swirling eyes. As if he needed to convince him somehow.

As if he was scared they would withdraw the offer.

Were Yahiko’s eyes getting a little damp or what.

They were interrupted by someone knocking on the open door. “Here she is,” Kyusuke said, ushering another kid inside, another rescue they just couldn’t bear to leave behind. She straightened her glasses, an unconscious reflex she had when she was nervous, and she always was a little around them, even if she had been living here for months.

“Come in, come in, Karin! We’d like you to meet someone,” Yahiko cheered, anxious to move this whole debacle to a happier note.

Nagato got up, setting Naruto down gently, even if the boy was reluctant to let him go. In the end Nagato had to kneel by his side and Naruto kept a hand tangled in the fabric of his cloak as the girl approached them.

“Who’s that?” she asked. She was brash in her hesitance, never one to show weakness. She was nervous too though.

“’m Uzumaki Naruto,” the boy answered, not so shy either, in the end. “And who’s you?”

Karin’s eyes widened at the name and she couldn’t keep the frown in place when she looked at Nagato for confirmation, who nodded slowly, encouraging. Karin blushed, a tiny, pleased smile softening her stern demeanor, making her look more like the kid she actually was still.

“My name is Karin. Uzumaki Karin.”

And oh, wasn’t it a sight to behold, the look of recognition on Naruto’s face, and the smile that bloomed, full force, on his young face, bending the whiskers on his cheeks, blinding in its intensity.

“Like Nagato!” he exclaimed, as if maybe the girl wasn’t aware of that. She huffed.

“Duh, of course he is. We’re a clan after all.”

“We’re a clan,” Naruto whispered back in awe. “Me too?”

“Well, yeah,” Karin said, showing disaffection like it was no big deal, even if she was fighting a smile of her own.

It was hard not to answer to Naruto’s open delight.

He reached out to touch her hair, of all things. They were a fiery red, much brighter than Nagato’s, and the boy stared at the strands in his hand, fascinated. She let him, she who was so wary of physical contact. Most Uzumaki’s shared the hair color, and even if Naruto didn’t, maybe it stirred something inside of him.

Did he have any memory, however fleeting, of his mother? It was sadly doubtful giving the circumstances of his birth and her death, but still…

“Karin, do you think you could take Naruto to have a look around the place? You can show him his room – it will be the one just next to yours”, Yugito urged, gentle but firm. Karin got the message – for a girl so young, she was smart and quick to the uptake, and she could get a dismissal when she heard one.

“Yes ma'am.”

“You don’t have to call me…”

“Come now, Naruto! I’ll show you everything.”

She took Naruto’s hand – he let go of Nagato at last, and followed her, a little bewildered, out of the room.

Yugito waited for the door to close behind them to let out a long, heavy sigh.

“That wasn’t part of the plan,” she said again, leveled this time.

“You didn’t see how it was back there. How they treated him. We couldn’t just do nothing!” Yahiko exclaimed, defensive. He didn’t want to argue this with her.

“That’s not what I’m saying,” she shot back sternly. “It wasn’t part of the plan, but now it obviously is. We have to act accordingly.”

“It’s now two jinchuuriki in our ranks,” Konan said. “One who deserted on her own volition, and whose existence was kept on the down-low, is not the same as two, the second having been abducted from his village.”

“Come on, we didn’t abduct him! He agreed!”

Konan stared Yahiko down with a steady glare, until he relented.

“Okay fine, I guess from an outside perspective we did abduct him a little.”

“So what now?” Yugito asked, and he knew it was her way of punishing him for that momentary lap of judgment. For not saying anything, not stopping Nagato when he understood who the boy was, what life he had lead up until then, when he simply elected to snatch Konoha’s jinchuuriki from right under their nose, although they were supposed to be on a diplomatic visit to the village’s commandment. Konoha wasn’t the most openly hostile toward the Akatsuki, but that didn’t make them friendly either.

All of them shared that blind spot, though when it came to family and children. Naruto was barely five, and he lived on his own, and he didn’t have a single person in his life who cared about him. Just like Karin they had found was slaving away in a Kumo outpost near the border of Ame, a child forgotten by the world.

But not by them. Never.

When Nagato had taken the child’s hand, it wasn’t as the Kyuubi’s host. It was as a lost member of his own clan.

Who happened to be the Kyuubi’s host though. Because they were lucky like that.

“Jinchuuriki are instruments of war,” Nagato piped up, joining back the group. They all tensed up – they were, and it was something they had always wanted to address at one point or another.

“Kumo could spare you, Yugito, but Konoha is without their own now. It leaves them vulnerable. Since it’s our doing, it’s up to us to fix it, and we’re not… We’re not sending Naruto back.”

He paused, just to be sure that was in agreement. They all nodded – on that matter at least, they were on the same page.

“The system works if every village has their weapon…”

“Or if none of them do,” Yahiko concluded, following Nagato’s reasoning down to its quite obvious conclusion.

Of course. Of course. That was it.

“Are you serious about this?” Yugito asked, and it wasn’t with her usual accusing or scandalized tone, the one that said “are you freaking kidding me right now?”. At the end of the day, she was here because she shared their ideals and goals, because she believed it. And she also shared the plague of her fellow jinchuuriki, she too had hoped for this before, but she had probably resigned herself to how powerless they were in this situation.

Except they weren’t.

“We no longer fear annihilation as we once did,” Yahiko said. They had grown powerful in the last few years. No matter how displeased the hidden villages were with them, they could no longer afford to move against the Akatsuki on their own, and their grievances were too antithetic for them to form an alliance over the matter. “And if we do this indeed…”

“We never will have to,” Konan said, considering. It was a risky bet, deciding to hoard all that power. Except they didn’t plan on ever using it. The rest of the world couldn’t know that, but they did. And they would hold on to this.

“What do you think, Yugito?” Konan asked. More and more she deferred to the other woman, with whom she shared a kinship that almost made Yahiko jealous. Except how could he be mad at Konan finally managing to form a bound outside of their little trio? Even Nagato wasn’t quite as bad as she was on this. But Konan cared deeply about the other woman, and Yugito did too in turn. Yahiko got a little emotional over it sometimes.

Besides, if Naruto was of Nagato and Karin’s people, in some other way he was of Yugito’s too. They shared the same fate, suffered the same injustice. Them, and the seven others. She had to be on board for them to act on it. If she refused…

“I think…” she said with a sigh, like she was regretting her words already, “that Suna’s jinchuuriki is about Naruto’s age, and treated about as well by his village too.”

She looked long-suffering, but she smiled at Konan’s pleased expression. Konan liked it best when everyone agreed.

“It’s settled then!” Yahiko said cheerfully. “Operation Jinchuuriki Snatching is officially in motion.”

Yugito smacked him around the head, but still, he laughed.

[evartandadam]

HEY, so I have a big question! But firstly, wanted to say I am glad I found your blog! I have been wondering lately: Obviously all the Akatsuki members have suffered some type of mental trauma from their pasts, so would you consider any of them as actual sociopaths-- not necessarily psychopaths? I ask because I have heard psychopaths are genetically determined but sociopaths are shaped by circumstance over time and are still slightly capable of having true moral and feelings. What do you think?

Okkkkk so you’re talking about the clinical definitions for ‘sociopath’ and ‘psychopath’ here. The problem is that no one can actually agree on these definitions. I have read soooo many articles on sociopaths vs psychopaths, and there are so many different opinions. Now, obviously there are two separate terms, so there must be differences. 

I will answer this question according to the definition you listed, and I will then answer it with my own definition. 

The only one who could have possibly been born with it would be Hidan. (Adding Orochimaru cause I forgot him- he was also likely born with an anti personality disorder.) The rest of them were raised to be the way they are. And most of them can still feel a connection with another person. The two who really cannot feel empathy at all are Sasori and Orochimaru. 

Now, like I said, I read a lot of definitions for these two terms, and what I gathered from them in bulk is that sociopathy is a spectrum, and a psychopath would essentially be the ultimate sociopath. Sociopaths by some definitions are still capable of connecting with individuals, but never groups. Psychopaths are deemed to be colder, and incapable of making ties of any kind. I think the born vs created argument makes the definitions unnecessarily complicated? Like, what about someone who is born with it but still feels connections? According to these basic definitions, this person doesn’t fit into either term! And this is because these terms are trying to squish too many attributes into one category or the other. 

So I’m going to ignore the born vs created aspect of this, because I answered it above and it doesn’t really influence any other attributes.

Here’s a list of Akatsuki from least to most sociopathic/psychopathic:

Itachi

Deidara

Kisame

Konan

Kakuzu

Hidan

Nagato

Sasori

Obito/Madara

Orochimaru

Ok so, the Akatsuki are kind of divided into three groups here: Those who had to give up their compassion to do their job but otherwise still can make connections/Those who gave up on connections a long time ago and are probably difficult to get to/Those who are too far gone- pretty much impossible to make a connection with. 

Note that I am rating these not only on their past selves but their current selves. Obviously all of them are kind of sociopathic:

Itachi, Konan, Kisame and Deidara are definitely not psychopaths:

Itachi has issues, but he cares very much for others. He sacrificed his own sanity and name to do what he thought was right for other people. He probably watches the rest of the Akatsuki and hates their actions. But another part of him is dead inside, so nothing gets to him as much anymore. A defense mechanism- indifference/apathy. A symptom of sociopathy. 

Deidara is interesting, because of how he kills people. Deidara was deemed a coward by Onoki, his master, for enjoying long-distance fighting. Deidara is obviously no coward, so why doesn’t he enjoy close combat? He seems to enjoy a good fight. It’s probably because he wants to get the job done without having to actually think about the aftermath. Deidara is very extroverted and seems to enjoy people. He is another character who, under different circumstances, would enjoy living a peaceful life as a creator. Iwagakure created what he is. I always sensed he wanted to be more than just a killing machine. I was actually going to put him higher on this list, but disperfection pointed out how Deidara even apologizes to Tobi (someone he can’t stand) before he kills himself, and warns Hidan and Kakuzu about Naruto even though he didn’t have to. He seems kind of… courteous. 

Kisame is one of the Akatsuki who really believes in their goal. He wants peace. He dislikes the shinobi lifestyle that he lived in the Mist. He obviously cares for Itachi. I put him above Deidara on this list, because there isn’t much concrete evidence that he is better than Deidara. But I still feel like if Kisame really had the option, he would want to live a peaceful life. Sociopaths also don’t feel loyalty for groups, and Kisame is all about that. Kisame and Konan are pretty much equal on this list. 

Konan as far as I can tell just does what Nagato wants. She loves Nagato, and she loved Yahiko. And she genuinely seems to want peace for others. People in Ame called her their angel, and it was likely because she was compassionate towards them. Konan is still a cold-blooded killer, and can distance her emotions to get the job done. But she feels a lot for people collectively. Konan is very similar to Kisame in a lot of ways. While Kisame enjoys bloodshed more, Konan couldn’t care less about killing those who are in the way of her mission. 

Nagato, Kakuzu and Hidan are in the middle, all for different reasons:

Kakuzu is just old and jaded. Kakuzu was a very loyal shinobi back in the day, and was stabbed in the back by the people he put his faith in. I feel that young Kakuzu was probably a pretty decent dude. But half a century of bounty hunting for a living will harden a person. Currently, Kakuzu would be very hard to make a connection with, which is why he’s so high on the list.

Hidan is very tricky to place because he could be a hardcore psychopath, but he seems to be capable of some compassion. Out of all the Akatsuki, Hidan is the most likely to have always had violent tendencies. But Hidan still has a moral code and follows a religion. This completely goes against what a sociopath is. Sociopaths believe they are their own gods, essentially. They also have no loyalty. Hidan is the trickiest one to place because he is all over the place. Hidan hase BPD, which explains why it’s so hard to place him on a sociopathic spectrum. Hidan is still filled with emotions, and he has a moral compass, even if it is screwed up. 

Nagato is actually a narcissist! I say he’s a narcissist because it perfectly fits into how he is used by Madara/Obito. Narcissists are lower than sociopaths on the food chain, and are usually manipulated by sociopaths. Now, he could be a narcissistic sociopath. But either way, Nagato has no problem killing people to get what he wants. He used to be very compassionate, but definitely lost his way. To willingly call yourself a god and deem yourself worthy of appointing suffering on others in such a ceremonial fashion requires a lot of distance from compassion. Hidan may kill you for his god and think it’s right, but Nagato thinks he IS god, therefore he is right. Nagato’s way of thinking is much more dangerous, due to the combination with his intellect and power. He has a chance to make the world better with his eyes, and instead he uses them to harm the masses. Not good. Still, like I said, Nagato is more of a narcissist than a sociopath, so I will not put him into the following category. Oh yeah, and let’s not forget he thought using his best friend’s corpse was like, a cool idea. *whispers* what the fuuuuuuu-

Sasori Obito/Madara and Orochimaru are classic psychopaths: 

Sasori is actually lower on this list than Obito! This is because Sasori doesn’t have a god complex, and mainly keeps to himself. But hey, if you think he belongs higher on the list, that definitely works for me! Sasori is the classic psychopath in a lot of ways. I mean, he’s cold, collecting and could be mistaken for the devil himself! But even Sasori was shown to be a normal, sweet kid until Suna trained him to become what he is. Sasori also kills people and does horrible things with their corpses, but he isn’t big on continuous torture. This could be why he hates Orochimaru so much. Doesn’t like his “style”. But Sasori is a very big sociopath! Wouldn’t want to run into this guy! I have done so many analysis posts on him… here and here! 

Obito is a total sociopath, sorry. I don’t think his character really makes sense, but judging by the things he has done and how much he enjoyed them, he is a sociopath! Now, Obito by himself would be way lower on the spectrum. But with Madara’s influence (a total socioapth), Obito rises the ranks! (Obito shouldn’t be capable of doing the things he did if Kishi was actually consistent with his character). Obito kills so many innocent people. He kills Minato, a man who loved him very much. He helps Itachi slaughter the rest of his own clan. He manipulates the Mizukage and apparently gives him a rep of being a tyrant. He even pretends to care about Deidara when he does not. Oh yeah, and he’s cool with killing anyone who gets in his way, including children. This guy has issues! Now, if I were to diagnose him with a mental illness, anti personality disorder is not at the top of the list! But I will still put him this high because he sucks. And he causes sooo much destruction. Master manipulator with a god complex. 

Orochimaru is shown to sort of care about one person- Tsunade. This isn’t definite- rather, it’s a headcanon of mine based on little signs here and there- but at times, he is soft when it comes to her. He seemed to have developed his need for immortality from watching her brother and fiance die. He watches her suffer and comes to the conclusion that death= suffering. And it is something he wants to avoid. Meaning he felt her suffering. None of the Akatsuki are complete psychopaths, but Orochimaru is very close to it. He tortures children on a regular basis. Don’t think it gets much worse than that. This guy is the most disturbing out of all of them, and he has competition! 

This list can be switched around many ways, so don’t think of any of these placements as concrete! 

[nenastrology]

orochimaru and the akatsuki really would have worked so well as explorations of the crimes of konoha and like its impact in their being villains with like orochimaru first seeming like a bit more of a lone power hungry nut job but slowly like drawing parallels with him and danzo and that the village really did look the other way with shit he did and that hes really just a more extreme version of some awful things that kids like sai were raised into in root and like the investigating and fighting orochimaru leading to uncovering that stuff and more dealing with how horrifyingly fucked up a lot of the shit they put kids through is and idk orochimaru really woulda worked well for that and also how he picks up all these kids who have slipped through the cracks of the hidden village system and manipulates and experiments on them and that this was kinda allowed to happen by how little these systems care for children you know and then on the other side akatsuki if they didnt have all the dumb shit later on and maybe just had the more simple clear goal of they want to control the tailed beasts because theyre incredibly strong and use them as weapons and checks on the rest of the shinobi world and like they are the more big picture critique of konoha and the warmongering and cruelty of the hidden villages and of course nagato yahiko and konans vision of a peaceful future like genuinely changing narutos outlook and maybe culminating in a far greater shift in his frame of mind and to actually wildly change things idk they are just both interesting villains and its sorta weird what the conclusions for them were im still losing my mind orochimaru didnt stay dead when that was such a good important moment for sasuke and like how each villain group has a strong impact and thematic ties to either naruto or sasuke its just interesting man its interesting wish the writing didnt go down the toilet

[sukirainbow]

[18+ Fic ]Survivor Guilt Recovery

Fandom: NARUTO Rating: Explicit - 18+ Content Pairing: Nagato x Konan | Obito x Nagato Characters: Nagato, Konan, Obito, the whole Akatsuki Content: Canon divergence, sad talks then comfort and smut, trans Konan, polyamory, the sad men are taking their meds and going to therapy, plans on hold we need to be gay right now (again), weird plot shit I pulled out of my ass to make things happen, referenced self harm, self worth issues, depressed character, crying, recovery, healing, voyeurism, disabled Nagato, everyone took chill pills in this they're so polite to each other Word count: 23178 - 21 chapters, complete work Summary: Nagato doesn't need to be on his control device anymore, Konan helps him recover physically and their blurry relationship takes off in a new direction. Obito witnesses this and starts questioning himself about happiness… And Love? The Akatsuki's future becomes uncertain.

I started this fic as just exploring Konan and Nagato's blurry relationship shifting into more intimacy, with sad discussions and comfort (and lot of sex), and Obito getting envious of this. Then I kept writing and it got lighter and funny in the later chapters. It's a long read but I hope you'll enjoy it.

Chapter one under the cut (explicit), read the rest on AO3

Chapter 1: New level of intimacy

Ever since the day of Yahiko's death, Nagato's legs were badly damaged and standing or walking had become painful. When he was on the controlling device it didn't matter, as he didn't need to use his legs, but for every other moment he used crutches and a little help from his fellow survivor Konan. She lost her lover when Yahiko died, leaving her inconsolable, or at least that's what Nagato assumed. But slowly they developed a relationship, though unlabeled, undiscussed between the two of them. 

No acts of affection happened, nothing sexual either. Konan started calling him beloved, first through Tendo, Pain's path that uses Yahiko's body, then when addressing him through another body or his own. Nagato cared a great deal about Konan too, owing her his life as she rescued him from dying of hunger as a child. She was also a very skilled and powerful Shinobi and he had a lot of respect for her as his partner in the Akatsuki. Their bond tightened around the mutual grief of Yahiko. Nagato still thought he would never allow himself to try and replace his dear friend in the young woman's heart. But he was certainly not indifferent to her charms. Something blooming was there but none of them acknowledged it much.

He was gazing at her as she used her origami techniques to deliver messages. So much grace radiated from her paper wings, from her silhouette surrounded by the black and red Akatsuki robe. Her eyes, of a bright orange tone and her long blue hair circling her face, she was so beautiful.

Recently, a friend of hers, who came from far away and who possesses intriguing techniques, had offered them to try and raise Yahiko from the dead. Sadly it didn't go as planned, Yahiko did not come back, but Nagato's body and soul went through a bizarre transformation : all his Pain vessels came to be alive, with his soul implanted in them all. He was now free from the controlling device, which meant he could finally take more care of his original body. This also marked the moment where their shyly blooming relationship took off drastically, having more time to interact and Nagato being in better shape than before.

One day, after he took a bath to wash his hair, Konan gestured to him to come near her for her to brush his hair.

“Oh, don't worry about it Konan, I can do it myself.”

“But I want to.”

He hesitated but caved in and sat on her lap and she delicately took care of his vibrant red hair.

“That feels... Nice…”

“See? Okay I'm all done. You can rest on my lap a bit if you want to.”

Nagato was surprised by the offer, but he quietly installed himself as to have his head resting on her thighs and laid his legs on the other side of the sofa, then closed his eyes, feeling very peaceful. He thought he could stay there for a while. Konan tried to drop the comb she used on the coffee table but it fell on the floor instead. She reached down to pick it up and put it on the table as her friend on her lap shivered and protested.

“Hm? What is it?”

“You just... Laid your entire chest on my face....”

“Oh. My bad, sorry. It's no big deal really…”

“B-but it is, it's not just any part of your body…”

“Nagato, dear. Don't sweat it.”

“It's your chest I mean. I-I'm.. You're a- a very pretty woman and-... and I'm just a guy- y-you know you can't just put your chest on my face like that without thinking!”

“Sighhh, what? Like that?”

And she did so again, smothering her breast on his quickly-turning-red face.

“K-Konan!!!”

“Nagato... We've been together for a while and you can't handle my breasts?”

“... So we're... Being intimate now?!”

“Yeah? Why not?”

Nagato went quiet and accepted his face-smothered-by-tits fate with a little whimper.

Konan adjusted her position a little bit, holding Nagato's upper body in her arms, breast still on his face.

“Actually Nagato... Do you... Want to suck on it...?”

His eyes widened and red flushed on his face again.

“... Do you want me to?... If yes then... Yeah.”

She slipped down her tank top and bra under her breast and held her tit to his mouth. He shyly started sucking on it as Konan guided him through with her voice while caressing his hair.

“Yes, just like that. Nibble on it... Tickle it with your tongue. Now suck as if you were trying to drink from it. Oh that's nice, you're doing good beloved.... Hmmm suck harder... Harder... Ohh Nagato…”

Nagato's hesitant nibbling slowly became more confident with her encouraging voice, he unconsciously stopped holding back. Behind his reluctant appearance, the redhead had wished real bad to do something like that to her one day without ever caressing the hope that it would one day be true. He closed his eyes and let himself get lost into the lust.

“God Nagato this feels so good, I wish you knew how good you're making me feel.”

The young woman had craved physical intimacy from their relationship too. The soft lips of her dear friend on her new, untouched breast felt heavenly. No one had touched her ever since her new puberty gave her these two soft bumps on her chest.

The interaction ended and left both of them out of breath and horny but it wasn't continued further. Not even discussed.

-

Read it on AO3

[imagine-allthethings]

NSFW Headcanons for the Akatsuki: Pein and Konan

YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS MOD SIN, YOU ARE WELL AWARE OF YOUR SINS - Mod Trash

Pein/Nagato

While inhabiting Yahiko’s body and the rest of the Paths of Pain, Nagato is more comfortable in his “own” skin. His current body is just so thin and unsubstantial. He’s much more likely to be intimate with his Paths of Pain rather than his own body.

Keep in mind that the Paths of Pain are all corpses, but for corpses they are incredibly well-maintained and warm. They function as normal bodies too, so without having being told this by someone, mainly by Nagato or Konan, it would have been nearly impossible to tell that they are corpses without a specific ability to see chakra.

There are six of his Paths of Pain; Yahiko’s body being his favorite. If his partner wished and Nagato had all of his paths as being currently nonessential, he would use them all simultaneously once in awhile. It’s definitely a thought he’s had more than once; experiencing sexual acts, all different, simultaneously through six bodies would be incredibly pleasurable for both him and his S/O.

If it ever got to the point when Nagato met his S/O face to face and they still decided to love him, he would be very happy, but would still be hesitant to be physical with his own body as opposed to one of his paths. He will constantly offer them one of his paths instead.

He will eventually trust them enough to have sex with them with his body, it will just take awhile. When it does come to pass, he’ll be visibly very nervous, so he’s going to bottom in his real body; at least for a little while. He won’t say anything, but reassuring kisses on his chest and upper body will make him feel better, as those are the places he feels look the most grotesque.

Once he decides to get close enough to someone to be calling them his S/O, he’s an incredibly sweet and sensitive lover when they are alone. He loves to give more than receive.

Nagato has a weakness for prolonged foreplay. He feels like it makes the act longer and inherently more loving. It is also a very convenient reason to overstimulate his partner, giving them chance to have multiple orgasms.

Konan

Konan is the most versatile lover of the group. She’s the switch of the whole Akatsuki. While she can adapt to either being a dom or a sub she’d rather be both interchangeably, though she can lean towards being a dom depending on her mood.

When in a dominant mood, she’ll physically hold her partner down or tie them and then proceed to edge them, constantly. She’s nearly relentless in her teasing.

Her partner may have felt more neglected during that session if she wasn’t so keen on after care during these times. She would definitely kiss their head affectionately and insist they bathe together afterwards where they will probably continue earlier festivities.

Konan really loves baths and being with her partner in the bath. The heat of the bath makes her feel heated and works as a form of temperature play. 

When she’s in a more submissive mood she likes to be held nearly flush against her partner. She’ll often claw at their back, tug at their hair, and is going to be incredibly demanding. She’ll demand that things get done and that they occur, and if they don’t, she’ll get pouty about it. 

Even as a switch, she’s definitely going to be a bratty or power bottom.

Her nipples are also incredibly sensitive, especially since they are pierced. If her partner wanted to take control for a bit an easy way to do this is to play with them. Tug them, bite them, trace them gently, it turns her on so, so much. She got them pierced in the first place for this reason. Please, please give this girl’s breasts more attention.

[ladykissingfish]

Bedtime with the Akatsuki (Part 2/2)

Kisame A lot of Kisame’s nightime activity is centered around taking care of his legendary sword Samehada. The blade is, after all, a sentient creature, and therefore needs to be treated with the proper respect. He re-wraps it, speaks to it, tells it his plans for the upcoming day. He also brings it with him to the dinner table (which makes the others horribly uneasy) because Samehada enjoys being around all the different types of Chakra, much the way Kisame enjoys being around the different personalities. One time Hidan made Kisame angry, and Samehada reacted by darting from Kisame’s side and leaping in front of Hidan, sucking his chakra right out of him. He drained so much that Hidan’s vitals all shut down, and the others actually believed he’d died ((Kakuzu actually cried tears of joy)); but the idiot just ended up internally regenerating a few hours later, much to everyone’s chagrin, Kisame isn’t really a nighttime sleeper in the way that the others are; he’ll take short naps throughout the entire day, but that’s really it. When not sleeping he’ll go for long walks, or, if the water is clear, a dip in the stream. He might also spend some time talking with his young sleepless partner Itachi, or having tea with him after the others have gone to bed. Zetsu Zetsu will rarely join the others for dinner, because the sort of food being served really isn’t to his tastes. Very very rarely he can convince Konan to give him a hunk of raw meat ((although this runs up against interference from Kakuzu, as the old guy doesn’t like “throwing money down the drain for the tree to eat bloody chicken”)). Doesn’t stay home at night; evenings are an ideal time for him to go scouting. He travels through the earth at enviable speed, sometimes spying on nearby village operations, sometimes doing a pre-run for an Akatsuki team’s upcoming mission. Zetsu doesn’t sleep too often, but when he does, he prefers to do so outdoors. His color and foliage help him blend seamlessly into all the other plants, so he’s never detected unless he opens his eyes. Also likes to take infrequent evening “baths” by immersing himself in a pond or stream (although he as to be careful not to overdo it; too much water can really mess up his insides). Tobi/Obito Eating around the others had always been a difficulty for Tobi, because doing so requires that he move the mask. For the longest time he’d simply tell the others that he wasn’t hungry, and then go and sneak leftovers to take to his room later ... but, very surprisingly, Deidara was the one who stopped this. On his own, he had a meeting with the others about what he guessed was Tobi’s dilemma, and then sat him down and explained, in his own gruff way, that “We all don’t give a damn what you look like under there, hm. Nobody is going to be staring at you, so just sit with us and eat, dumbass.” And true to Deidara’s word, nobody tries to look at him while at the table. Tobi has found a way to move his mask about a quarter of the way off his face, so only his mouth is exposed, but still; everybody remains respectful of his desire not to be looked at, even Hidan. After eating, though, the maturity of the situation is dropped and Tobi becomes Tobi again, pestering the others, running around the halls; either Deidara or Sasori remind him to take a bath for the night, which he outwardly balks at ... but inner-Obito loves. The water couldn’t ever be hot enough, and Obito likes to “borrow” bubble bath from Konan whenever he can, letting the luxuriant smells take his mind away from his troubles for a bit. Bedtime always starts off okay; Obito is tired from putting on Tobi all day ... but actual sleeping is difficult. Obito is plagued with gruesome nightmares about death and loss, and largely left alone to deal with them. He’s tried to go to Deidara’s room ((for some reason the blonde’s constant angriness is something Obito finds soothing)) but Deidara locks his door. Sometimes Obito will force himself back to sleep but often he’ll wander outside, away from the base, to walk along the forest and stare at the moon. He’ll

always return before dawn, just as bright and energetic as everyone expects him to be.

Konan Konan spends a good deal of the early evening cooking. At first she didn’t really agree with Pein’s One Meal Mandate, but after a few times she starts to see the value in it. Cooking for her is a way to relax, and shrug off some of the tensions from the day. And everybody is really appreciative of her culinary efforts; there’s never a single pan or plate that comes back with food on it. She doesn’t really talk much herself at the table; she prefers to listen to the others. It’s interesting, the personalities that emerge when the topic isn’t war or death or fighting. After dinner, after dishes and cleaning (which the sweetheart Itachi always helps her with, whether she asks him to or not), Konan goes into her room for Konan-time. Her favorite thing to do is write in her journal; when she was a young girl and the man known as Jiraiya came into her and Nagato and Yahiko’s lives, he was always working on a manuscript for a book that he said he’d call Make-Out Paradise. When he left, he left behind the drafts of this work in progress, and ever since then, Konan has been scribbling out alternate endings and continued scenes to the (admittedly scandalous and definitely perverted) collection of tales. An embarrassing hobby, maybe; but one she enjoys. After writing, she’ll carefully apply an overnight face mask and go to bed, closing her eyes and laying flat on her back. She’s a fairly heavy sleeper, and her internal clock faithfully wakes her up every morning at the crack of dawn. Well, either that or an early-morning shouting match between some of the more rambunctious Akatsuki members. Hidan Anyone looking at this guy would think he has a normal nighttime routine. He’ll come back from a mission, he’ll wash up, he’ll eat a pleasant meal with “the family” — and then the scariness comes out. Hidan will pack up his scythe and his jashin bible and head out from the house, in search of converts (or sacrifices) to his wonderful religion. Most of the people he finds are rogue ninja, or travelers making camp for the night in the woods. Man, woman, young, old — nobody escapes the wrath that Lord Jashin reserves for blasphemous disbelievers. A good night will yield Hidan 2 or 3 sacrifices; a GREAT night, a dozen or more. It used to be that he’d drag his victims back home for the rituals, but the other members complained to Pein that the noise and the screaming made it difficult to sleep, so Hidan is forced to carry on his activities away from the base. When he returns, the immortal is satisfied but utterly exhausted. Without bothering to clean himself up, he’ll drag himself to his room and throw himself down on his bed, often falling asleep face-first in his covers. The others will complain about the mess he leaves in his wake ... but that’s what Zetsu is for. Hidan has a deal with the plant-man that he’ll leave him some good “juicy” parts of his victims intact, as well as tell Zetsu where to find them, and Zetsu cleans up the bloody wreckage from the hall and (in the morning) the bathroom. Actually more of a win-win for Zetsu alone, but it works for Hidan. Kakuzu For this guy, bed time is budget time. He’ll sit at the dining table as Konan brings out dish after dish, and stay there long after the last plate has been cleared away. So focused on crunching his numbers that he’ll have to be reminded to actually eat. Kakuzu is the Akatsuki’s treasurer, which means it’s up to him to ensure that every member on the team is financially prepared to face their upcoming missions. Pein will give him a list of who’s going where the next day, and what possible expense they may run into ((the Akatsuki isn’t exactly a paying job, but Pein ensures that the members always have a reasonable amount of money on hand, to sustain them/keep them fed during their journeys)). Kakuzu takes what money is in the treasury and doles it out accordingly. When he’s done with that, he goes to his own room and counts out his OWN money. Kakuzu takes on capturing many bounties

in his spare-time, and the majority of his gains are kept solely to himself. He feels he has to do a count every night because he doesn’t necessarily trust those around him ((especially Hidan)) to not “borrow” from him when he’s not around. Evenings are also when “Dr. Kakuzu” receives patients; sometimes Deidara will come to him and ask him to tighten the stitching on his arms(which he carelessly loosened with his damn excessive bombing), sometimes Hidan will need bits and pieces sewn back on after one of his sacrifices goes south. One time Itachi came to him and requested stitching from a gash he’d received down his rib cage ... by far one of the worst injuries Kakuzu had been asked to treat, but the kid didn’t even so much as flinch. When the money and the medical appointments are finally finished, Kakuzu will get into bed with a magazine (the guy has a hidden love for architect and interior design) and usually end up falling asleep before he’s gotten past the first few pages.

[jouissezduprintemps]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Naruto Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Jiraiya/Tsunade (Naruto) Characters: Jiraiya (Naruto), Tsunade (Naruto), Orochimaru (Naruto) Additional Tags: Implied/Referenced Character Death, young sannin, Alcohol, A date that's not a date, Writer's Block Summary:

Jiraiya has recently returned from Ame, and he's scheduled a book deal with his publisher for his newly-titled Icha Icha series. A bout of writer's block has him stuck before a deadline, and he hopes that spending a night on the town will bring his creativity back. Tsunade does her best to help him write a better story, giving him a little more inspiration than she had planned.

Follow Link or Read Under the Cut

With a precise, deliberate move of his fingers, Orochimaru released a drop from the pipette onto a glass slide, which he slid underneath the microscope. He fiddled with the lenses to bring the sample into focus. “I’m busy,” he stated, looking away from the specimen long enough to scribble some notes in the book to his right. “I don’t have time.”

“Come on,” Jiraiya prompted. He held a jar in his hands, examining the human eye suspended in liquid. With a grimace, he set it back on the shelf, unsettled when he swore it looked at him. “You’ve been in here for days. Have you even eaten? You’ll die if you don’t eat.”

“That’s why I have Anko,” Orochimaru reminded his teammate. “Lab assistants do more than sanitize the workspace.” She hadn’t been working for him very long, but she showed significant promise. Regrettably, he had sent her home for the night without thinking to have her bring him dinner from a nearby restaurant. At least he had some food pills tucked away, somewhere.

“I need my wingman! It’s a Saturday night, I’m back, and we should celebrate.”

“I can’t stop in the middle of an experiment.” He knew he had told him this a hundred times before. “I can’t leave and come back to it later. The process will continue with or without me, and if I’m not here to record my findings, I’ll have to start from scratch.” He turned away from the microscope, sorting through various dyes he had organized on a nearby table. “Can’t you ask Tsunade?”

“What?” Jiraiya laughed. “You think she’d come out with me as my wingwoman? She’d scare any girls off! None of them would come near me if I was with her. Besides, she’d never agree to that.”

Orochimaru shook the bottle of blue dye between his fingers before carrying it back to his station. “You know as well as I do that she’d do just about anything if you pick up her bar tab.” He paused while he wrote something down. “I won’t be done here for at least another three hours. You’re welcome to stay, if you like, but you’ll have to be quiet, so I can focus.”

Jiraiya huffed exaggeratedly. Three hours wasn’t terrible. That would put them at midnight. They would still have a few hours to hit the town. Well, he might as well entertain himself. He walked to the far side of the room, where a large, cylindrical tank bubbled as oxygen enriched the water supply. It appeared empty, but he couldn’t be sure. He gave three sharp raps on the glass with the knuckle of his index finger.

“If you can’t keep yourself from touching the equipment, you need to leave,” Orochimaru hissed, eyes still focused through the lenses of the microscope.

“Alright, alright. I’ll keep my hands to myself.”

“You’re a terrible liar, and you’re a distraction. You need to go.”

“But-”

“Out.”

“You suck,” Jiraiya grumbled, crossing his arms as he walked to the door. “You know, you have to hang out with us sometime. You’re pale enough as-is. Get some sunlight, have a drink.”

“I will, when you manage not to interrupt my process.”

“Fuck your process,” Jiraiya grumbled.

“Out.” Orochimaru pointed at the door, lowering his hand only when he heard the door to his lab click shut.

Jiraiya exited the building and looked up, trying to guess the time. It was only about nine. He hadn’t heard from Tsunade, so she was either out gambling or at her apartment. It was a death sentence for his wallet if he found her in the gambling den, so he played it safe by deciding to check her residence first. With any luck, she’d be there, and willing to entertain him for a few hours. He’d had writer’s block for almost a week now, and he had to do something to get him writing again. He had three more chapters to write before his next deadline.

He didn’t have to think about where to go; his feet carried him through the familiar streets. God, it was good to be home. As much as he cared for those kids, it had been a long couple of years out there, alone. Well, not alone, but without anyone older than half his age. He’d missed the smell of Konoha, the people, and, most of all, the sun. He’d have killed for just one day of sunlight in Ame. He did his best to push Konan, Yahiko, and Nagato from his mind; the night he had planned for himself in no way involved children.

It involved alcohol, a good time, and, if he was lucky, some company.

He stopped in front of a familiar door and knocked three times in a rhythm. He waited for a minute before he knocked again, this time calling, “Princess! I know you’re there!” He didn’t, but it was worth a try all the same.

With no response, he began to knock on the door rapidly. She couldn’t stand when he did that. If she was home, he’d earn her ire, but she would inevitably open the door. As expected, Tsunade jerked the front door back, taking away his instrument. She was dressed in sweat pants and a tank top, and her hair was down. He looked up at her face, and she was angry. Oh, fuck, she was pissed.

“What do you want?” she snapped, crossing her arms below her chest.

He had to play his cards carefully. If he could make the right moves, maybe he could get out unharmed and convince her to join him. Starting the verbal dance, he began, “Can I come in? You’re not going to make me stand on your porch, are you?”

Her lips drew into a thin line as she looked up at him, studying his face. Apparently, he passed her test. She stepped back into her apartment, turning her back on him as she walked into the kitchen. Jiraiya let himself in and shut the door. So far, so good. He followed her, surprised to see her digging through her almost-empty cabinets.

“Everything I buy goes bad before I get to eat it,” she complained aloud. “I’m just going to stop buying food.” She tossed an unopened box into the trash for emphasis.

“You sound like Orochimaru.”

“You take that back.” She looked at him over her shoulder. “Why are you here?”

“I was hoping you’d want to get a drink with me. It’s a Saturday night, and it’s been years since we went out.”

“Whose fault is that?” Tsunade grumbled, flipping over a pack of noodles to check the expiration date. It joined the box in the trash. “I planned on finding dinner, watching a movie, and going to bed early before my shift at the hospital. Why should I go out with you?”

Jiraiya continued to watch her, smirking when he realized her predicament. How did he not figure it out sooner? “You lost all your money again,” he stated his conclusion.

She wheeled around and narrowed her eyes. “Don’t make fun of me,” she snapped, gesturing at him with an unopened granola bar.

He ran a hand over his face, doing his best not to laugh. “What am I going to do with you?” He shook his head and started to walk down the hallway.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” she demanded, stalking after him. “Hey!” She threw the granola bar at his head, and he dodged the attack. “I’m talking to you.”

Jiraiya opened the door to her bedroom and began rifling through her dresser drawers. He tossed various articles of clothing at her, stating, “What I mean is that I’m taking you to dinner, Princess. You need to eat, and I need the company. Now get dressed.”

Tsunade looked down at the clothes in her arms, weighing her options. She had to set her pride against her stomach, and her stomach won. “Fine,” she relented. “Get out.”

“Do I have to?” As soon as the playful words left his mouth, he knew he’d gone a step too far. He slipped out the door before she could reprimand him, escaping her wrath. He walked back into the kitchen and took up the task of sorting through the cabinets, getting rid of almost everything. The woman was worse than he was. It was remarkable that neither of his teammates had died of starvation while he was gone.

“Let’s go,” Tsunade suggested as she reappeared, tying a ribbon around her hair to keep it in place. “Where are we going, exactly?” she added, realizing that she had no idea what she was getting herself into. The bribe of food took precedence over the rest at first.

“Where do you want to go?”

“Don’t do that to me.”

“Do what?”

“Offer to buy me dinner and then ask me to choose where we go.”

“Most women would be happy about that, you know.”

“What’s the catch?”

“No catch. Have a little faith in me, Princess.”

“You know this isn’t a date.”

“I know.”

She eyed him warily. He seemed genuine enough. “Sushi?”

“Yeah, I can do sushi.” He grinned down at her. It wasn’t their usual haunt, but the change of pace might be nice. He wouldn’t have much of a chance of meeting women at a sushi bar, but there was plenty of time for that as the night went on. “Shall we?” He offered her his arm dramatically. Used to his behavior, she swatted him lightly on the bicep before taking it, aware that he wouldn’t relent until she did.

The pair went in search of their late dinner, weaving through the crowded, main streets as they entered the middle of the village. Tsunade stopped in front of a restaurant, but Jiraiya’s hold on her arm took her with him, despite her protests.

“What’s wrong with you? We agreed on sushi!”

“If we’re going to have sushi, we’re going to have good sushi. You’re no fun when you’re sick, and I’m not taking that risk.”

“Jiraiya!”

“Indulge me.”

She bristled, but she did as she was told. They walked down several more streets before Jiraiya found what he was looking for. They entered the small restaurant and seated themselves at the bar, needing no time to decide what they wanted.

“I’ll take the tuna,” Jiraiya ordered.

“The squid, and a bottle of sake.” Tsunade smiled at their chef.

Holding up two fingers, Jiraiya corrected, “Two.”

Tsunade filled her saucer and took a sip before speaking. “I know you didn’t come to my apartment to buy me a pity dinner. What’s really going on?”

“I wanted to see if you had plans, and if you wanted to go to the bar. The whole food thing was secondary, but I’m glad I stopped by. I had to throw almost everything out.” He frowned, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. “How’d you lose it this time?”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she mumbled.

“Princess…”

She sighed. “I was winning. Really! But, you know, I got cocky…”

Jiraiya bit back a chuckle by finishing his saucer, enjoying the burn down his throat as he filled it again. “And the fact that you were winning didn’t tip you off?”

“Hey, I can win every now and again.”

“Really?” He snorted in amusement.

She broke apart her chopsticks and snapped them near his nose.

The chef placed their plates in front of them before turning back to his work, preparing the next orders for the other guests. Tsunade picked up a piece and put it in her mouth. “Mmm.” It had been so long since she’d last had a satisfying meal like this.

“Good, right?” Jiraiya asked with a grin. “And you wanted to go to that chain restaurant.”

“Alright, I was wrong. I admit it.” She waved her hand dismissively before drinking more of her sake. “Now, be honest with me. You’re spoiling me, and I want to know why. I already told you that this isn’t a date.”

He shrugged, more than willing to admit the truth. “I missed you. I missed this. Is that so bad?”

She was flattered, although she refused to show it. All she allowed herself to say was, “It’s good to have you back.”

He grinned. “You missed me.”

She scoffed. “Right. Whatever you need to tell yourself.”

He lifted his saucer to his lips and took a drink. “Yeah, you definitely missed me.”

They both knew he wasn’t wrong. Trying to change the subject, Tsunade asked, “So, those kids. How did that go?”

Jiraiya thought back on the last few years of his life, summarizing, “It was interesting, to say the least. Not what I thought I was signing up for. They’re good kids, though. I’m sure they’ll do fine on their own, now.”

“Orochimaru and I thought you were out of your mind.”

He clicked his tongue. “Yeah, well, there were a couple of times you wouldn’t’ve been wrong.” He shook his head. “But I don’t want to talk about Ame. Tell me what’s been going on here.”

“Not much, to be honest. Oro’s spending all his time in the lab. He’s taken on an apprentice, you know. Weird little girl…” Tsunade shrugged. “It’s just been more of the same. Shifts at the hospital, missions, that sort of thing. Sensei’s kid just made chunnin.”

“Good for him.” Jiraiya upended the last of his sake into his saucer. “And what about you?”

“What about me?”

“Anything I need to be updated on?”

“I’m not half as interesting as you think I am,” she complained. “Trust me, there’s nothing exciting happening in my life other than my shifts in intensive care.”

“I found a publisher,” Jiraiya informed her. “My book, the one I wrote in Ame, is going to come out sometime next year. They’ve already slotted me for a second one.”

“A sequel?”

“Not exactly. I pitched a new series, and they bought it right away. But, now, I have to work on a schedule. I’m really bad at that; I need three more chapters by next week, and I’ve been stuck for days.”

“Can I help?”

Surprised by her offer, Jiraiya had to gather his thoughts before telling her, “Not really. I just need to get creative again. I sit down to write, and, just… nothing.”

“Come on, what inspires you? What makes you want to write? What helped you write in Ame?”

“The first book was completely different. I had all the material I needed, and the kids kept me so busy that when I sat down to write, it just worked. But the new series…” He drew random shapes in the air with his chopsticks as he tried to think. “It’s not the same. I can’t rely as much on personal experience. It needs a little more… finesse.”

“That’s how I’m going to pay you back for dinner,” Tsunade decided. “Let’s pay and get out of here. I’m going to make you write those chapters if it kills us.”

Jiraiya didn’t argue; having someone make him sit down and write, to keep him focused, was probably what he needed. He threw some bills on the counter to cover their tab, leaving the change for the chef. As they stepped out into the night, he asked, “Just go easy on me, okay? It’s not as easy as it looks.”

“Trust me, I know. I can’t write to save my life, and that’s just counting memos and letters. You and your books… not even close to my wheelhouse.” Tsunade smiled at him, and he soaked in her compliment. He didn’t get very many. “I can provide sake, some company, and maybe a little motivation.”

“That’s more than I could ask.” He hadn’t had someone sit in on his writing process before. The material of his book was, say, sensitive, but if there was anyone he could trust to give him honest feedback, it was Tsunade. She might crack a few jokes, but she wouldn’t change her opinion of him just because he was trying to write a romance novel.

He flicked on the lights to her apartment, and she opened the cabinet above the refrigerator, bringing down a bottle of sake. He snorted, quipping “At least alcohol takes a while to go out of date.”

“I could just not give you any.” She narrowed her brown eyes, like she was staring through his soul.

“I’m sorry.”

“Mm-hm.” She grabbed two glasses and walked into the living room, throwing herself down on the couch. She uncapped the bottle and handed Jiraiya his glass when he sat down on the opposite end. “So, let’s hear it. What do you have at this point? Where are you stuck?”

He pulled a notebook out of his pocket, hesitating before he opened it. “You have to swear that you won’t tell anyone. Not Oro, not sensei.”

Tsunade put her hand over her heart. “I swear. Now tell me!”

“Don’t laugh, okay? I pitched it as a romance series. You know, guy-gets-the-girl. But it’s from the guy’s point of view, you know? Something different that isn’t really done in the genre.”

“I like that,” Tsunade told him, her voice genuine. His ability to think of these things was what made her believe he had a career in writing. Those little nuances could make or break a book. She would have never thought of something so simple, but revolutionary. “That makes it different.”

“Exactly. But I can’t let that alienate the audience. Guys aren’t my only demographic, here. At least, I don’t want them to be. So, that’s where things have gotten a little tricky. Let me think of how to put this… I need the guy to go after this hard-to-get girl without looking like a total asshole.”

“So, don’t make him an asshole.”

“See, you say that like it’s easy. But us guys, if we like a girl, and she isn’t interested, we look creepy if we keep trying. There’s no sweep-you-of-your-feet moment for us; we have to do the sweeping. So, it can be really hit or miss.”

“Well, does she like him?”

“He doesn’t know yet.”

“Okay, but you should. You’re the author. You need to know what you’re working with here. Is she interested? Is she annoyed by him? And do you want him to grow on her? You have to get inside her head.”

Jiraiya tapped his pen against the notebook. How had he not thought of that? “She gets annoyed sometimes, and that’s genuine, because he can be a little forward. But, other times, she thinks it’s endearing. I think that’s what keeps him guessing? He can’t figure out the pattern. What do you think?”

Tsunade tucked her feet underneath her and turned to sit sideways on the couch, facing him. “Well, that’s not much to go on, but if I had to guess, I’d say she likes him. I don’t know that she loves him, at least not yet, because it’s early in the book. But if a woman does that, it’s usually a sign that she’s into someone. Maybe he’s someone she doesn’t want to like, or thinks is relationship material?”

“So, you’re saying that she might be into the main character, but either doesn’t know it or doesn’t want to admit it?”

“Yeah.”

“Hmm.” He wrote down several lines in the notebook as he took this in. “I think I’ll go with doesn’t know it, and then move on to doesn’t want to admit it.”

“Sounds about right. So, here’s the big question: does he get her?”

“I don’t know.” He faltered. “I hadn’t decided.”

“No wonder you’re stuck!” She threw a decorative pillow at him, which he caught before it hit his face. “Idiot. You can’t write a book if you don’t know how it’ll end or what your characters are thinking!”

“Okay, okay!” Jiraiya drained his glass and held it out for her to refill. “I get it. I jumped in too quickly.”

“You can work with this, though. You could have your character trying to figure out what you’re asking me. Does she like him? Why does she get annoyed? You know, that type of thing.”

“That could add to the conflict. I was thinking about having her be in love with another man.”

She reached out and smacked him on the chest. “Don’t you dare pull that cliché shit. A woman can be uninterested if she’s single. If you have him win her away from another man, I will personally take your book and put it where the sun doesn’t shine.” There was a bit of fear in his eyes. Good. Fear was healthy. “We’re not all fragile creatures. Sure, she could have had her heart broken, or pine after someone else, but there are plenty of reasons a woman might not want to be with a man.”

“Like?” he asked, genuinely trying to get answers.

“She’s trying to figure herself out. She doesn’t want to be tied down. She’s not looking for a relationship. She lost someone. She doesn’t trust people.” Tsunade ticked off each point on her fingers, listing just a few. “But,” she raised her index finger, “that doesn’t mean that she isn’t interested in something simple. She could be looking for friendship, or even just sex. It doesn’t have to be complicated. Women aren’t as hard to figure out as you think, if you know what to look for.”

Jiraiya’s pen scratched across the paper, writing down everything she said. She was incredibly helpful, and he thought that she might have pulled him out of the rut he was in. “Give me a second,” he told her, flipping the page and continuing to write. She moved to the middle of the couch so that she could look to see what he was writing down.

“I can’t read your handwriting,” she complained, her brow furrowing.

“You don’t need to. This isn’t even a rough draft at this point.”

“So? Read it to me.”

“Keep it in your pants,” he grumbled, continuing to write so that he didn’t lose the words. He’d filled another two pages before he stopped, a smile on his face. Maybe his block was finally gone. “Okay, tell me how this sounds:

He placed a hand on her hip and cradled the back of her head with the other. With a strong pull, she fell against him, and he captured her lips in a passionate kiss. Despite her protests, he held her there until she melted into the sensation.”

“That sounds like a terrific way to get your ass kicked.”

“What?”

“That has to be the first time he kisses her, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Any woman in her right mind would slap him and walk off. It doesn’t matter if they’ve been flirting, or if there’s tension. Unless she’s drunk off her ass, which it doesn’t sound like she is, there’s no way she’d let him get away with that.”

“Okay, Miss Expert. What would you have him do?”

“He’s got to come in slowly. Just… here, let me show you. So, he should take his hand like this,” she took Jiraiya’s hand, movements mimicking her words, “and put it against her cheek. He could brush her hair back or stroke her cheek, something to get some contact going. Now, if she likes it, she’s going to smile or lean into it. Make her seem relaxed. If she’s fighting, she doesn’t want it, and that’s not somewhere you want to go.” She waited for him to nod in understanding. “Good. Now, what he does here can vary, but you can keep his hand on her hip if you want. I’d say he should move it to her lower back. See? Flat palm, enough to guide, but without physically grabbing her. You don’t want to make her feel trapped.”

His mouth felt dry as he looked straight at her, his brain doing its best to function in the current situation. His hands were on her. It wasn’t like he’d never touched her before; they’d sparred, and they’d leaned on one another after many a night with too much to drink. But this was different. Even if it was a demonstration, she’d put his hands on her. She was letting him. He didn’t realize she was speaking to him until she shouted.

“Jiraiya!”

“Huh?”

“I’m trying to help you, here. The least you could do is listen.”

“Right. Yeah. Okay.”

“Like I was saying, if he wants to pull her to him, have him apply a bit of pressure to her lower back. Draw her in, don’t pull her. Go on.”

He followed her prompting, subconsciously holding his breath when she was pressed against him. Sitting on the couch, their height difference wasn’t as pronounced. He was only a few inches above her.

“See the difference? There’s nothing wrong with getting a little rough, but that’s a big no for the first kiss. If he wants to get another chance at it, he needs to come in with a peck, linger for just a second, and then kiss her again. No tongue unless she starts it.” She grabbed his notebook and pen off the arm of the couch, moving her face from his hand so that she could write. “Let me put this down for you so that you don’t forget. I’ll be pissed if I read it and you use that shitty line in the final copy.”

“You want to read my book?” He didn’t conceal his surprise.

“Yeah? Why wouldn’t I?” She snapped the notebook shut. “You’re talented, and you know it.”

“I’m just surprised that you’d be interested in a romance novel written by me, of all people.”

“If you keep coming up with crap like this, I’ll make you add me on as a co-author. You’re going to need my help to write this book. Of course, I want to read it when it’s done.”

He crinkled his nose. “I guess I’m not as smooth as I thought.”

Tsunade did her best to fight back her laughter, but she failed. He was insulted, yet she couldn’t stop. She waved her hand, excusing herself before wiping the tears forming in the corners of her eyes. She downed the rest of her glass to compose herself. “No, no, you’re not.”

“Don’t make fun of me,” he protested. “I’ll have you know, I have no trouble getting women.”

“You ‘get’ women because you’re hot and you buy them alcohol until they stop listening to you.” She snorted as she raised her glass to her lips. “Trust me, you don’t exactly have a silver tongue.”

“You think I’m hot.”

“Hm?”

“You just told me I’m hot.” He grinned widely at her, and she rolled her eyes.

“Please. It’s an objective observation. Don’t let it go to your head. I could have said the same thing about Oro.”

“Nah. See, Oro’s pretty; remember, we agreed on that word for him before I left. But you just said I’m hot. There’s a big difference.”

“Just take the compliment, Jiraiya.”

“Oh, I am. See, I know I’m hot. It’s just a fact. But you said it.” He poked her playfully in the shoulder, laughing at the annoyance on her face.

“You know what? This is your problem. You push. You just can’t leave well enough alone, can you?”

He leaned back and picked up his glass. “Some people would call that settling.”

She shook the empty bottle from side to side, frowning to herself. She peeled herself off the couch and sauntered back into the kitchen, where she threw the bottle into the trash. On her toes, she reached into the cabinet above the refrigerator, groping where she couldn’t see. “Little help here?” she asked over her shoulder.

Jiraiya remained seated, watching her with a quirked eyebrow. “Only if you admit it.”

“Fuck you,” she grumbled, turning back to the task at hand. She improvised by climbing up onto her countertop, clinging to the top of the cupboard for balance. The way she had to contort her arm was far from comfortable, but she succeeded in reaching the bottle at the back of the cabinet. In victory, she withdrew it, moving a little too quickly for her inebriated state to pace. She slipped, but she fell for less than a second before she was steadied.

“Easy there, Princess.” Jiraiya lifted her off the counter and set her back on the ground with infuriating ease. “I think you’ve had enough.” He took the bottle from her hand and sat it on top of the fridge.

“I’m not drunk.” She crossed her arms.

“I know. Believe me. But that doesn’t mean I should enable you.” He placed a hand on her shoulder and maneuvered her back into the living room. “I can’t have my writing partner wasted. We still have two more chapters to get through. You promised, remember?”

“Why did I do that?” she asked herself ruefully.

“Doesn’t matter; you’re locked in, now.” He sat back down on the couch and patted the cushion beside him.

“Fine, but I’m laying down.” She stretched across the sofa, her knees hanging over the arm and her head against Jiraiya’s thigh. By the way he looked down at her, she knew he was amused, but she couldn’t care less. “So, you have the guy kiss the girl. Then what?”

He settled back against the cushion, draping his arms over the back of the couch as he thought. Absentmindedly, his fingers traced lazy circles and swirls on her thigh, just above her knee; it surprised her that she didn’t swat him away. His chin was tilted up as he looked at the ceiling. “I guess he’ll figure out that he needs to be patient to win her over. She’ll probably keep rejecting him, but he’ll keep trying.”

“That isn’t romantic. Are you sure you’re writing for the right genre?”

He grinned down at her. “You see, that’s where you’re wrong. I’m writing realistic romance. That dime-store crap old ladies read has nothing on my work. That’s all fantasy. I want mine to be life. The ups and the downs, with everything in between. It’s never that easy. People fight, they get jealous, they get rejected. But, they keep trying. That’s what I’m going for.”

She nodded thoughtfully. It may have been the alcohol talking, but she agreed, “I see what you mean. Well, if you want to talk about a fucked-up love life, you don’t have to look further than our team.” Her laugh was bitter.

“What’s Orochimaru been up to that I don’t know about?” he asked, more than a little concerned by the thought. “Oh, my god, Tsunade. Please tell me that you and Oro didn’t…”

“No!” She reached up and put a hand on his forehead, forcing his head back up. “Pervert.”

“I had to ask.”

“No, you really didn’t. God. He’s like my brother.” She shuddered at the thought. Orochimaru was dear to her, and she loved him, but she certainly wasn’t in love with him. He was a friend, a reassuring presence, and a shoulder to lean on. “And if you want to know what he’s been up to, ask him, not me. You know how private he is. I have to respect that.”

“Now I’m really curious.”

“Too bad.”

“What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Anything I missed while I was away?” he asked. “No new beaus I have to fight off?”

With a glint in her eye, Tsunade sat up and turned to face him. “You heard that the feudal lord died, right?  Well, his son thinks he wants to marry me.”

“His son?”

“Yeah. Something about my Senju blood, and all that crap. But, you have to see this. Hold on a sec.” She jumped up and rushed down the hall, returning a moment later with a cardboard box, a square foot large. “He,” she said as she sat back down, crossing one leg beneath her, “has been sending me useless little trinkets for ages, now. I kept sending them back, but he’d return them. I pawn most of it.” She laughed, taking delight in how her admirer was unknowingly funding her gambling habit. “But, but, he sends these little haikus with them. I was saving them so you could look at them when you got back.” With glee, she handed Jiraiya a folded piece of paper.

He smoothed the paper out and read aloud:

“Tsunade Senju Won’t you please accept my love And this sake set?”

Jiraiya cackled, but Tsunade waved her hand to silence him as she read off another piece of paper.

“I have seen your face Only in a photograph You have nice cheekbones.”

“You’re fucking with me.” He took the piece of paper from her and read it himself. “He’s gotta be on something. I mean, he has to know how bad this is, right? No one’s that self-absorbed.”

“Oh, but he is. I have a year and a half’s worth of these things. And you want to know the best part? I’ve never replied. Not once. But these things just keep coming in the mail!”

He gave a low whistle. “Damn. He has it bad.”

“Thank you! God, no one else thinks it’s funny. Sensei wants me to write him and tell him one way or the other. Oro just doesn’t care. A year and a half of these things, and I finally get to laugh with you about it!”

“So, I take it you’re not interested.”

She snorted. “I’d rather die than be a politician’s wife. Hell, I don’t think I want to be anyone’s wife. Not for a long while, anyway. Sure as hell not to someone I don’t even know. It’s a stupid construct, anyway.”

Jiraiya bit his tongue before he reminded her that she didn’t always feel that way. Bringing up Dan was probably the worst thing he could do. Instead, he added his own opinion. “I think it might be nice in, what, twenty years? You know, when I’m retired, and all this bullshit is behind me. No war, no missions, just me and my books. When I’m not just living day by day. By then, I should have enough from my royalties to get myself a nice place, maybe with a view. Enjoy myself. Maybe then, I’ll settle down. But, for right now, we don’t get to be that lucky. We’re ninja.”

“Exactly,” Tsunade agreed.

“You know what? What do you say if, in twenty years, we’re both alive and very much alone, we tie the knot and get the hell out of here. Just say ‘fuck it’ and find somewhere away from this village and all this ninja bullshit.”

“Only if you’re rich enough to support my drinking and gambling.”

“Princess, no one could ever have that much money.” He deserved the punch he received on the arm. “Come on, yes or no?”

“I don’t know. What if you get old and ugly? Or if there’s no spark? I don’t want to promise you something I don’t want to keep.”

“Okay, first of all, I will never be ugly, and the fact that you would even think so is insulting. As for our compatibility, I think we’ve got that covered.”

“Making out in a cave eight years ago doesn’t count. We were in a war; nothing counts when you’re fighting a war.”

“Fair enough,” he had to admit. She was right, and he knew it. Even when he was eighteen, he knew that they’d pretend it never happened. It was one of the biggest disappointments of his life. “Damned shame, too.”

“What do you mean?”

“It not counting. I was using all my best moves, too. I mean, looking back, they weren’t great, but it was what I had.” He grinned at the thought. “You punched me in the jaw because I grabbed your ass. It was worth it.”

“I forgot about that…”

“Well, I sure as hell didn’t!” He laughed.

It was completely on impulse that she caught him by the collar and pulled him down, silencing him when she pressed her lips against his. She tried to keep him there, but he pulled back, looking down at her in confusion. “Whoa, there,” he stammered, eyes wide. His hands loosened hers from his collar and moved them away. “Tsunade, look at me. How many fingers am I holding up?”

“Two, jackass,” she snapped. “I’m not drunk. I’m lucid. If you want to be a prick about it-” The rest of her sentence died when he leaned back in, closing what little distance remained. She fought not to laugh when he placed his hand on her lower back; at least he learned quickly. When she deepened the kiss, she realized that this was the first time she’d allowed anyone to get close to her in this way since Dan. The thought didn’t bring heartache with it this time, which was a pleasant twist, but one that still stung.

But this was Jiraiya, for god’s sake. It wasn’t like she was replacing Dan. She hadn’t moved on, so she refused to feel guilty for her actions. This wasn’t about Dan, or filling the void he left. There was already a place for Jiraiya in her heart when Dan worked his way in; she didn’t have to reduce his space to make room. They had no secrets from one another. He knew that Jiraiya loved her, about the incident in the cave, about everything. But he was never jealous; he wasn’t that type of man.

When she knotted her fingers in Jiraiya’s hair, when he fell with her, on top of her, to lie on the couch, it was entirely different. What she had with Dan was light, almost spiritual. He was her one. Sometimes, she wondered if he even belonged on earth. He was the high she didn’t want to lose.

With Jiraiya, it felt more like she was sinking, being pulled down to a rock bottom she didn’t want to climb out of. He knew her deeply, intimately, so much so that she couldn’t wear her mask. He knew every scar and every mark because he’d witnessed them form.

She realized she hadn’t been breathing when she broke away, gasping for air. His lips grazed down the side of her neck, and she shifted beneath him. Immediately, he lifted himself up by placing his hands on either side of her head. He searched her face for any negative expression as he asked, “Too far?”

“No.”

“If you’re uncomfortable, all you have to do is tell me. I get it.”

“Stop being a good guy and get back down here.”

“Because if this has something to do with Dan, I don’t want you to do anything you might regret. I don’t want to be that guy.”

She groaned and ran a hand over her face. He’d taken the moment out back and killed it, so she might as well clarify. “No, this has nothing to do with Dan. I’m not repressing or escaping. I would have broken down by now if I was. Now, stop looking at me like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like I’m going to break. I’m not. You can either accept that this is a completely lucid, consensual situation, or don’t, but you need to decide.”

“I need you to swear it to me. That this isn’t going to hurt you, or us.”

She wished she could take away the look in his eyes. He was being cautious, and she couldn’t blame him. When he’d left, she’d been far from okay. She placed her hands on his cheeks and pulled his head down, resting his forehead against her own. “I swear.”

Satisfied with her answer, he kissed her with fervor, holding himself up with one forearm, leaving the other free to roam down her side. She threw her arms around his neck to keep him close. Calloused fingertips brushed beneath her shirt, against her abdomen, and her hips bucked involuntarily in response. She could feel his self-satisfied smirk and bit his lower lip in retaliation. Her fingers worked against the knot in his belt, trying to loosen the fabric. Of course, he couldn’t just tie a simple knot. She should have known better.

“Why are you such a pain in the ass?” she murmured against his lips, trying to focus. She grinned at her victory when she finally released the strings of fabric. Her hands pushed his jacket off his shoulders, and he moved his hand away to reach over his back, grabbing the hem and pulling the article up and off his body, shifting his weight to free his other arm.

“There’s no way we can stay on this couch,” he complained as he tossed his jacket to the floor. “It might work for you, but I’m going to fall off.”

“Then get up,” she prompted, pushing against his shoulders. He stood up, and she followed suit, walking off down the hallway. For a moment, he stood in place, dumbfounded and confused. “Are you coming?” she called, tossing something down the hallway. He bent over and picked it up, realizing with a start that it was her shirt.

It took his body a moment to catch up with his mind. It was only when she said his name that he jumped into action.

“Jiraiya?”

Nearly tripping over his own feet, he stumbled down the hall, clumsily pulling his own shirt over his head as he went. He bumped against the wall hard enough that he’d probably end up with a bruise, but at least he knew he wasn’t dreaming. It had taken six years to get her to kiss him, and another six to get this far. He’d rather die than miss this chance, and, hopefully, he wouldn’t have to wait six more years before he could have her to himself again. In fact, he would make sure that it wouldn’t be that long.