#he’s flirting I promise Logan is just very stupid

[warnadudenexttime]

Virgil: Hey uh- did you look at the bill I gave you? Cause’ I, uh, wrote my number on it.

Logan:

Logan: Intentionally marking currency is a federal offense.

[stormxpadme]

Whumptober 2023 No. 15 - I'm Fine

Scogan Bingo challenge Hangover

Logan woke up thanks to some pitiful whining from whomever he'd ended up in one room with after last night's maybe slightly exaggerated drinking excess at Stark Tower, and to utter confusion.

Indeed, he needed a few moments longer than usual after coming around, to sort his memories. How the fuck had that happened? It took a lot of booze to get his healing factor to its knees so badly that he felt even intoxicated for a few minutes. So chances were probably, Natasha had gifted him with a few bottles of the Russian good stuff as a thank you for some of the X-Men helping their favorite competing team out with yet another HYDRA attack on downtown New York yesterday. Most of the other team members had gone home right after that battle, but Stark had insisted, Scott and Logan should stick around in his main residence, for toasting to yet another triumph over evil … Right. Thinking about it, Logan was pretty sure, he'd spent a big part of the ensuing evening, continuing that promising little flirt with his team leader that had been continuously growing more serious and purposeful by the week, ever since Scott's and Jean's overly dramatic breakup following Jean's rebirth and demonic possession a year ago. And something – that damn other demon, the one at the bottom of the last bottle, probably – must have possessed Logan, asking Scott for a dance at the end of that damn bender, when the hall had been almost empty already … Oh. Oh damn. A groan somewhere between amusement, wonder, embarrassment, and a hint of anticipation on his lips, Logan rubbed over his face lazily when his brain finally went into fully orientated mode, his senses kicking in, and he realized, no, he hadn’t been imagining it … That was indeed a very well-known, grounded sense hitting his nose from the other side of that Kingsize, mixed with the distinctive ocean breeze note that was Scott's favorite aftershave and a slightly stale note of alcohol, not to mention Logan's own scent all over the guy. Yep, judging by what Logan could recall in spite of his still dizzy state, there was indeed a quite alluring reason for why he was covered in lots of sweat and … other body fluids. Oh well. That had been a long time in the making. It might not exactly have been the plan for last night, originally, but at least that annoying dance around the fire from the last half a year or so was finally over. "Good morning to you too, Slim."

"Stop screaming," a sleep-heavy voice rasped instead of the kinder, more charming answer Logan had half and half been hoping for. A complaint followed by another pained moan that might have alarmed Logan if he didn’t remember now Scott emptying one glass after another himself at that damn party. With someone who usually didn’t even touch the New Year's Eve champagne, that had been destined to go south from the start.

Just like that, Logan was suddenly wide awake as he realized, maybe giving in to his desire for this stupid bastard so readily hadn’t been the best idea after all. Not when they'd both not been entirely clear in the head.

"Why the fuck are we up?"

"It's two-thirty," Logan answered as diplomatically as possible, fighting to bite back the growing disappointment in his voice. Now that Scott and he had finally stopped being idiots about the attraction and feelings between them, he wasn’t interested in yet another fight about stupidities. Somehow, he had to get his dear team leader awake anyway though, with their duties at Mutant High waiting for them. The last chaos after the clusterfuck that had been the Cure and Dark Phoenix crises was still not entirely sorted out even months after, and neither of them could afford to be gone from the mansion for too long right now. "In the afternoon, in case you wondered."

"I didn’t, so don’t bother me with details." Logan watched as Scott pulled the corner of their shared blanket up over his head, robbing Logan of the delicious sight of his broad bare chest being covered in more than one bruise and bite mark. "Get out, leave me alone. Piss off Stark, hunt some deer or something."

"Would love to," Logan lied, feeling his anger grow by the second. "But my shorts and shirt are somewhere between you and that wall. And you promised Bobby motorcycle driving lessons. So you can either get up on your own or I'll have to carry you to the shower, bub. Anyone ever tell you you're an ass when you've been drinking?"

"You want me to blast you out of that window, you can try." Still grumbling, Scott peeked out from under that blanket again to glare at Logan from behind his glasses, and Logan decided in spite of his irritation, his lover looked absolutely adorable with sleep-tousled hair. "Why exactly are we naked again?"

"I'll explain that to you when you're older." Logan rubbed through his beard again tiredly, more disillusioned by the moment, and finally pushed himself to his feet, not entirely by chance tugging the blanket off Scott's naked shape as he went. He winced in sympathy when his lover instinctively sat up a little and tried to hold on to it but immediately buried his face in his hands with a noise like a dying whale. "Coffee, Advil, or hospital?"

"I'm fine," Scott snapped at him, followed by a hiss as he rubbed his temples with agitated fingertips. At another attempt to finally pry his eyes fully open properly and move his hurting head from one side to the other, he let out a little yelp, revealing even bigger gaps in his memory than Logan had feared. "You wanna tell me what that thing on my arm is?"

"Should wash off in a week, don't worry. Stark had one of these henna artists at the party. You said it kinda reminded you of me." Only even less sure now if Scott had actually wanted what had happened last night and accordingly with a hard lump in his throat and stomach, Logan reached down carefully to brush that stupid stylized wolf head on Scott's biceps with two fingertips but pulled away immediately when Scott's shoulders tightened as if they hadn’t been touching far more intimately just a couple of hours ago. Well, so much for that.

"Right. Next you're gonna tell me whatever I've got in my tongue there was my idea too." Scott's mood was audibly dropping by the second.

Logan decided, hungover Scott Summers was an even bigger pain than regular Scott Summers, which at least helped not feeling like shit that much. No, this was definitely not how he'd imagined the morning after the end of an arduous but allegedly successful hunt. Whatever. Not like he wasn’t used to pain or something. He should probably just find the rest of those bottles Natasha had given him to counteract that sobering up in more than one regard immediately. And in a month or so, it would stop hurting. Always did. "You sure as fuck had no complaints about it when you used that stud to make me come with your mouth two times last night. But you know what? If it bothers you so much that you let your hair down for once, take it out, swallow some of these smarties, and get dressed, and we just never talk about this again." No longer in the mood to act considerate, Logan slapped down a blister of the strong stuff from his uniform's emergency belt kit on the night table and bent down next to his lover's curled-up shape, reaching for said remains of his clothes next to him, ignoring Scott's new moan this time when the annoying water filled mattress shifted his slightly battered body. "Imma wrap things up with the Avengers. Try to look alive when I come get you in half an hour or so, unless you want our photo on the title of some mutant gossip magazine. You know Stark's always got paps outside his garage. Wouldn’t want anyone to know whom you ended up in bed with by accident, right?"

Before Logan could rush off to the bathroom to wash the traces off the night with a very cold shower and push it from his system that he'd ever had gotten his damn hopes up about this catastrophe of a relationship just waiting to happen, Scott reached up to him unexpectedly and pulled him back down on the bed, on top of him. Another agonized oof came from his lips when Logan, taken by surprise, didn’t catch himself in time and the considerable weight of his adamantium-steeled shape pressed against Scott's obviously quite oversensitive stomach for a moment. But in spite of the very unhealthy color on his cheeks, Scott somehow managed to fight down the threatening nausea. And finally, finally, there was that half-sided, very affectionate and, by Scott's standards, almost light-hearted smile on his lips again that Logan had come to love so much last night, this time definitely without any alcohol involved. "You're an idiot. You seriously think it's sleeping with you I regret?" With still very uncoordinated but determined movements, Scott buried his hands in Logan's hips, playful fingertips digging into his bare ass cheeks, and Logan had to try very badly suddenly not immediately getting hard all over. "I'm only pissed that I needed to drink my weight in tequila before I had the guts to take you to my room. You don't think I would have wanted to be fully aware when I finally got to eat you alive? Just tell me …" With another deep sigh, Scott looked down on himself, on the many traces of their passion covering his arms and chest. "… it was worth it."

"I got a better idea." Breathing away the last of this short moment of wrath, of fear, Logan bent down without hesitation to capture Scott's beautiful full lips in a kiss, fighting back a grimace about the fragrance of said tequila still lingering on his lover's body. "You get that sweet tight ass of yours in the shower now, brush your teeth, take your pills like a good boy, and let me do the boss duties with our government-sucking friends for once. And once we're home and the kids are all asleep, I'm gonna remind you in every single detail what we got up to last night. Lucky for you, I'm great at repeat performances. Then you can judge for yourself if it was good enough for the high Scott Summers standards."

"I'll take you up on that." Scott struggled to sit up a little, trying to chase another kiss but then suddenly turned another shade paler in his face, so quickly that Logan could only just reach for the ice cube bucket next to the bed in time to prevent a few less sexy traces of body fluids on his body. "You know I don't mean it when I tell you I fucking hate you right now, right?"

"Something would be missing from my life if I didn’t hear that from you at least once a day, don't worry." Logan patted Scott's head as he got up again and hurried to get to the bathroom to make himself somewhat presentable, not least so that he could fetch some more badly needed drugs from Stark's med bay. There'd probably been more romantic first versions of the famous Sunday morning after in dating history but he found, somehow, he still couldn’t wipe a stupid huge grin on his face when he stepped into the shower.

*******************************************************************************

@whumptober | @whumptober-archive

@scoganbingo

[earnestly-endlessly]

kind of an odd request — do you have fics where erik is grumpy with everyone else but a ray of sunshine with charles?

Hi anon, thank you for the ask. First and foremost, I'm so sorry for how long this took me but I've been searching for all the fics that come to mind that fit your request. Second, this is not an odd request because I love this trope so much. I mean, it's basically canon that he's grumpy with everyone except for his Charles, right? Anyway, I might add to this list later on, but I can't sit on this any longer and hope that you have found some fics that you enjoy!!

Fic Recs Where Erik is grumpy with everyone but a ray of sunshine with Charles

Twice as Blind – Darksknight

Summary: Erik is probably the biggest asshole on the face of the earth, and because of this, he'll probably die alone. Charles is a complete flirt and playboy and, probably, will never commit to anyone ever.

(The lesson here is that when you have two friends who are BOTH secretly seeing someone, well, it's probable that they're seeing each other.)

In the moonlight, on a joy ride – scarlettblush

Summary: Librarian AU. Charles is the young librarian and Erik is the college student who is completely besotted with him.

The Proper Care of Actors – Clear_Liqueur, Clocks, Etherei, afrocurl

Summary: Erik is an A-list action star who is notoriously difficult to work with, until the day he gets cast alongside Charles Xavier, rom-com darling who can charm the pants off movie audiences the world over and apparently even one Erik Lehnsherr. The paparazzi catch them out and about soon enough, and their real-life Hollywood movie romance becomes instant tabloid fodder.

Rumor Mill – ikeracity

Summary: Erik is the grumpiest, most foul tempered worker at Stark industries. His grumpiness is the stuff of legends.

So it's obviously the talk of the office when Erik is being made to go to the company party and he's bringing his husband. There's rumors flying round about how much of a masochist or equally antisocial bastard Erik's husband must be to put up with him. Others think he must be a meek mouse perhaps bullied by Erik.

What they weren't expecting was the confident, charming, adorable and unbelievably nice Charles that turns up on Erik's arm. What they certainly weren't expecting was how much Erik obviously adores his husband and how happy he is to let others see this.

Work/Life Balance – pocky_slash

Summary: Alex is pretty sure his weird, anti-social boss is a robot. Right up until the guy's adorable husband shows up. His adorable husband who happens to be a famous actor. His adorable husband who happens to be the very same famous actor who was the source of many of Alex's teenage fantasies.

Terrifying Domesticity – ishipitsobad

Summary: Erik is the most dangerous and notorious mafia boss around for miles, and yet the strangest things terrify him.

For example: his children, and his very pregnant mate.

Of kittens and teacups and love – Ren

Summary: Modern AU in which Charles and Erik are flatmates. Charles studies psychology and likes tea and chess and keeps bringing home stray kittens, and Erik lets him because he's maybe perhaps a little bit sort of in love with him.

Fools Rush In – LoveSupreme

Summary: Erik owns a cafe on the edge of campus and accidentally starts maybe-stalking a Biology Professor there.

Growing Pains – ikeracity

Summary: Twelve-year-old Erik Lehnsherr is an angry, closed-off foster kid with trust issues and a bad temper. Ten-year-old Charles Xavier is a lonely kid in boarding school who just wants a friend.

Logan pretends he doesn't think they're both fucking adorable.

Series

Home Together (The Finding Our Way Remix) – significantowl

Summary: Erik is not the sort of person other students strike up conversations with. His expression, his posture, every part of his manner say: Don’t talk to me. I don’t want to talk to you. But none of that stops the boy ahead of him in line with the collapsible white cane, and nothing can stop Erik from falling for him, like it or not.

Melted Ice Cream and Macaroni Art – pocky_slash

Summary: Everybody likes Charles. Nobody likes Erik. And that's really the source of Erik's doubts. Also, there's ice cream and a baby. Part of ‘the Daycare’ verse.

Walling in or Walling Out – stlkrchck

Summary: Erik stifles a sigh. Of course this is Mr. C. F. Xavier. Of course.

For the prompt: Charles and Raven are throwing a holiday party. Erik is the grumpy neighbor who is annoyed by how loud they are being. So he goes to complain, and Charles makes it up to him.

(Wise Men Say) Only Fools Rush In – wildelybroken

Summary: After reading a fic where Erik and Charles are super sluts, meet at what is presumably Raven and Emma's engagement party, and end up sleeping together, I made the following comment and just inspired myself.

"They start casually texting each other throughout the day, maybe while they’re bored or frustrated at work, and start out meeting up and sleeping together semi-frequently. And eventually they accidentally start dating without noticing it at first, not until Raven and Emma get them alone and are like “wtf you two super sluts are actually dating??” And at first they deny, but then they’re both like “holy shit, we are!” And they meet back at one of their places and they don’t have to say anything, they just look at each other and come together immediately, kissing passionately and ~making love~. In the middle of it they realise that’s what they’ve been doing for a long time now and they confess their love to each other and they live happily ever after because they deserve all the good in the world."

For Charles – Shigai

Summary: Tired of being told he has to find his 'heart', classical piano graduate Erik Lehnsherr decides to travel to Italy and drink from the famous Italian passion for music. While searching for it, he meets Charles Xavier, a graduate in Fine Arts who is basically travelling around the world perfectioning his technique, and who will turn his world upside down.

Together they will discover that, sometimes, what you thought you didn't need is what you needed the most.

Erik Hates People – Anonymous

Summary: Erik hates people- it's his rule, a way of living.

Sugar – humanitys_cutest

Summary: Erik glances at the clock for what feels like the tenth time in less than half the minutes. It feels like he's been in some meeting or other since the day started almost 10 hours ago, and he's had just about enough of listening to these pompous old men discuss what would be the best design for his building like they know anything about it. He tries as subtly as possible to massage his temples to assuage the building migraine, but he knows it's no use.

He just wants to go home.

Everyone Likes Charles – Rosawyn

Summary: '“Everyone who's met him likes him.” Cain's grin was even stupider than before. “Once you meet him, you'll see.”

It was almost like a challenge then. And damn. Erik hated saying no to a challenge.'

Still Going Strong – JackyJango

Summary: Speaking of forty-eight, Erik hates it. Hates it even more that others are aware of it. While he’s pragmatic enough to know and accept that aging is inexorable, the increase in number gives the people around him the freedom to pounce at him with questions, opinions and advice he'd fought to keep at bay all year.

Besides, Erik believes that youth is a state of mind, not a phase in one’s life.

You have a child’s mind in a man’s body, Charles constantly tells him.

But despite his age, Erik is healthy. He works out daily. His muscles are steel and he can dead-lift four hundred pounds. He can break bones without breaking a sweat. Most importantly, he can still carry Charles to the bedroom and fuck him senseless. And as long as Erik can do that, he’s perfectly happy.

All I know is pouring rain and everything has changed – hllfire

Summary: Charles meets Erik, the man he had heard about many times from his sister and some friends, on a rainy Sunday morning. The stories about Erik paint him as a distant and intimidating man, but Charles finds out that maybe the stories had been wrong.

How to Successfully Ruin Your Life – humanveil

Summary: Seventeen-year-old Charles Xavier accepts a job at his local café, expecting nothing more than a fun, new pastime. What he gets is a mysterious customer and a schoolboy crush.

Stolen – ishipitsobad

Summary: Erik is a miserable, grumpy, cantankerous bastard, and he has every fucking right to be. He drew the short end of the stick when he got the Underworld as his domain, and there isn't very much fun to be had in judging and governing dead souls who would rather be anywhere else but with Erik in the depths of Hell.

So when he meets Charles, brilliant and lovely Charles who is more popularly known amongst the mortals as Persephone, and feels the promise of something wonderful that could make his eternally doomed existence infinitely more bearable... you can bet all your drachmas Erik's not going to let Charles go any fucking time soon.

Erik Lehnsherr's Guide to Saving the Universe By Meeting Your Soul-Mate and Falling in Love in Less than 72 Hours – magneto, pangea

Summary:Army Pilot Erik Lehnsherr is just trying to enjoy his day off when a mostly naked person crashes through the roof of his car. Even more alarming, the strange falling naked person—who goes by Charles Xavier when he's not speaking an ancient dead language—brings tidings of the apparent potential end of the world, and begs Erik to help him put a stop to it.

Well. His mother has been nagging at him to go out and meet new people.

The Theory of Partnership Dynamics – Pangea

Summary: “Detective Lehnsherr, how wonderful to see you out on the job!” The fed in the front greets him as they draw nearer. He’s shorter than the other two by a full head, and he’s beaming at Lehnsherr as if completely undeterred by Lehnsherr’s paint-peeling scowl.

“What do the feds want?” Lehnsherr asks bluntly.

“You know I can’t tell you that,” the fed answers cheerfully. Then his gaze lands on Alex, and, impossibly, his grin gets even brighter. “Did you get a new partner?"

“No,” Lehnsherr says through his teeth while at the same time Alex says, “Yes.”

[fakeloveaskblog]

I think you. should ask Janus to "slither" over to your house! But also give him options! Like, "would you like to join me for dinner at my house? Or do you prefer to just go on a walk? How about we go to a fancy restaurant~ My treat~. Or maybe just enjoy each other's company at a park? You don't have to of course!"

(Words: 2095)

Logan: "Ah yes wonderful tactics stranger! This will surely be useless in my upcoming attempt!"

It was nearing the end of the day. Janus was closing up. Meanwhile Logan was trying to calm his nerves by reminding himself that he was objectivly very cool. He had on one of his best sweaters to look extra good (it had the tardis on it!).

"Alright. Looks like we can go home and have an existential crisis about the passage of time" Janus said motioning towards the exit.

Logan took a deep breathe before grabbing onto the sleeve of his crush' shirt "Please wait just a moment. How long have we known each other?"

"I guess since I started working here...so around 6 months? Please don't tell me you’re quitting! Work would just become soooo much more enjoyable"

"I was actually wondering if you mayhaps would like to accompany me on a so called 'hang out' during our leisure time...Today...Or some other day! If you want to! You don't have t-"

"No! No I would hate to!- Love! I mean I would love to!" Janus couldn't stop himself from grinning.

Logan flapped his hands in happiness "Good! So would you maybe like to go to the park nearby or-"

"No! Yes! Yes!"

"Great!"

Logan walked out of the library and held the door open for Janus. After quickly locking they walked towards the park. It was a simple small one. Just some trees, lots of grass, lots of people smoking grass, a pond, angry ducks, even angrier swans and exactly 1 ice cream shop.

All Logan wanted to do was take his crush' hand. It would be hard to do even if he tried to because Janus was constantly fiddling with his gloves. He was barely even looking at where he was walking.

"....I'm sorry for the weird way I talk sometimes" Janus quietly confessed "With the backwards talk. I kind of lie when I get nervous? I think?"

"Oh I know" Logan replied.

"You kNOw?" Janus' voice went up a tone.

"It is very noticeable but it is also quite charming if I may say so myself" It took a moment before he carefully added "Besides I have read that compulsive lying and also vitiligo can come from great stress or bad...events so even if I did not find it charming I wouldn't hold it against you either"

A small smile played on the edges of Janus' lips "Thanks"

"No need"

He took an impressively deep breathe before he stopped in the middle of the road and dramatically grabbed onto both of Logan's shoulders to stop him. He stood on his toes to make himself taller and stared into his love's eyes.

"I do not think you are also charming at all!!!" Janus very loudly announced.

Logan let up into a chuckle. He forced himself to keep eye contact "Well thank you"

Janus let go of him and kept walking very very quickly to try and distract from his red cheeks and heavy breathing. That was flirting right??? He had flirted??? He had done it??? He'd flirted??? The little voice in his head that he was starting to think was his self confidence trying to break through to him would be so proud!!!

“So would you perhaps like an ice cream in these trying times?” Logan asked. He was walking with his hands clasped behind his back.

“Oh right I would definitely love something high calorie that would just make me even more gross”

“Somehow your thick layer of sarcasm was the part of that sentence with the least falsehood in it. We can share one? Or if you get uncomfortable eating desserts in front of other people we don’t have-”

“SNAKE!” Janus interrupted him. 

He ran out into the grass of the park and hunched down to gently pick up a slippery snake. It was small enough to keep in one hand. He was repeatedly hitting his other arm against his leg and putting his fingers in uncomfortable positions.

Logan happily sat down next to him. Janus ungraciously shoved the snake right up near his face.

“It’s a baby northern watersnake! It’s not venomous I promise. It hunts fishes in the water. Isn’t that cool? It’s also one of the few species that doesn’t lay eggs! It can even put out musk to protect itself!! It’s so-”

He realized how much he was ranting and immediately forced himself to stop. He stopped his arm as well. He was so annoying.

“I apologize. Sometimes I just run my mouth and I do these stupid motions”

Logan boped his nose “The only stupid thing about that is you assuming I wouldn’t want to hear you rant. Or see you....stim...? I literally flapped my hands 5 minutes ago. I do not judge”

Janus shrugged at the stim question “My mother did always say that my father has adhd but that was in an insulting way. When I have done research on adhd I relate to a lot of it but it’s not like I have a diagnosis or anything”

“Bitchass mother” Logan mumbled under his breathe “I do not have diagnosed autism either but I do still now I have it.....Besides....Not to brag but I have both a deegre in both psychology and medicine so I can basically diagnose myself anyway”

Jan was already too overwhlemed to ask how the hell he had had the time for 2 bachelors deegre only to end up at a library.

“Anyhow we don’t have to talk about psychology...now...............maybe one day though” Logan did a little robotic evil laugh “For now maybe you can infodump about that snake, then we can get a shared ice cream and then I can infodump about glorious star trek. How’s that for a plan?”

His crush took a deep breathe before nodding. He stood up and cupped the snake in his hands. “You want to go to the pond don’t you little guy? Want to hunt and murder a few fishes don’t you?”

He turned to Logan and shuly said a few more facts while they went to the pond. He patted the snake on it’s head before carefully setting it down among the plants at the water’s edge.

The friends sat in silence for a few minutes, watching the snake as it looked for prey. (Though Logan spent most of the time adoring Janus’).

When the snake caught a small fish and swallowed it whole Janus broke out in happy flaps. He let out a happy squeal while pointing at it. Logan nodded back at him. He mimicked his flapping. 

He’d never seen Janus’ smile that brightly. Logan took his hand. Intertwining their fingers. They stimmed together until Lo pulled in his hand making his crush stumble into him. 

Jan sat with his head leaned against his chest. He looked up at Logan with blushing red cheeks. He forced himself to move back even if he didn’t want to.

“Sorry”

“No need” The nerd assured.

He stood up and held out his hand to help Janus up. They didn’t let go of each other’s hands as they walked towards the ice cream shop.

“To piss off homophobes” Janus lied up the explanation while motioning for their hand holding.

“Of course”

They ordered a scoop of lemon ice cream and sat down by the tables outside. Janus had taken off his gloves.  Their hands laid on top of each other. 

“Do you also have that experience where” Logan stopped to take a bite of ice cream “You categorize your life into what you were hyperfixated on at the time? For example I remember that when I met Patty I was into Doctor Who and right before then I was enjoying Sherlock Holmes”

Janus shrugged. He didn’t want to say that he had a hard time even remembering most of his life clearly “I can see the Doctor influence” He nodded towards his tardis sweater.

Logan’s eyes lit up “Oh have you seen it??? The ninth and fifth doctors are my favorite! Though as a bi man I can not ignore David Tennants’ everything”

“I have seen exactly 0″ 

“Well that is not a problem that can not be fixed! When I met Patty she hadn’t either- maybe because we were 12- but I show-”

Janus choked on his ice cream “12? Oh wow. For some reason I had assumed you were older”

“Oh no. She moved towns and started in my class. It was almost love at first sight. I stole flowers from my neighbor and invited her to see the movie everyone in town was talking about....Kung fu panda”

He broke out into a laugh.

“Don’t laugh at me Janny! It was an incredibly tactical decision. You see I knew she liked animals and the kung fu panda is a panda”

Janus doubled over the table while continuing to laugh “Me throwing popcorn at myself during my first hangout almost seems cool in conparison”

“Popcorn is usually hot. Not cooled down” Logan corrected. “Though to be honest the start of our relationship was sort of what you can call a ‘mess’ since as you already know both of us were foolish enough to think Patty was a guy. So suddenly I had to come to terms with liking guys. Until she told me she was a girl. So then I was straight. Until I met Thomas but that is a whole different story. It was like some people say a rollercoaster”

“Am I rude for finding that funny?”

“Yes incredibly and frankly you should be dragged to the guillotines right now”

Janus leaned closer to him with a sly smile on his face “Aw ~darling~ I didn’t know you could be sassy”

Logan did his best to hide how the nearly choked on his own spit “Yes I can indeed be if I want to. Just like how I have been able to have adequate facial expressions and voice tones and also eye contact during our whole hangout. Normally I only have a lot of expressions and tones if I am talking about hyperfixations or my wife”

“You don’t have to do that around me”

“Really? It does take a lot of energy to try and appear ‘normal’ but I was afraid of coming across as rude”

“Darling I find you lovely either way” Janus was going to pour up the biggest glass of fucking wine when he got home. He was a flirting machine!

“Oh okay” Logan relaxed his shoulders and started looking at a point right next to his shoulder instead of at his eyes. “Want to hear about Star trek the next generation? It’s the one with Data in it”

Janus squeezed his hand “I definitely have a very good idea about who that person is. Yes please tell me”

Logan went on a very very long infodump which Janus happily listened to (and did his best to reply to even though he didn’t know much). He was sure he would never get tired of hearing him talk. The ice cream nearly melted because they were both too busy with what he had to say.

“-And that is why the poetry actually have significance” Logan concluded after nearly half an hour.

“Well that sure sounds like an interesting series”

“I can show you it? Soon? I have it all on dvd”

“It’s a date- I uh I mean like planned thing not like romantic I mean-” Janus babbled out.

“I am aware of what you meant” He checked his watch “It is probably a good time for me to depart. It’s my turn on laundry today. I will get to categorize socks!”

“Wow. Sounds like a party”

Logan excitedly nodded. He stood up. Janus did as well. They looked down at their still connected hands. Jan was about to let go and simply leave but to his surprise Logan pulled him into a hug.

He leaned down and moved his arms around Janus’ waist. In return Jan quickly stood up on his toes and buried his head into his love’s shoulder. He breathed in his scent. Coffee and strawberry jam. He closed his eyes, taking in the moment.

“Janus, You are so special to me” Logan murmured while holding onto him as hard as he could.

“I- I love- I love being around you” He whispered back. Too afraid to say the truth.

Logan tried to memorise the way it felt to have him this close before letting go and taking a step back “Well I will see you tomorrow then”

“Can’t wait!”

[anxiouslyfred]

Limping on Phantom Pains

Summary: Remus is very much against the world when it comes to injuries being celebrated as a chance to find your soulmate. Why would he want to hurt a stranger for so flimsy a reason. Roman doesn’t care and will drag his limping brother off to congratulate his friend in hospital

CW: broken leg, hospital scene

/\/\

Remus knew how to avoid injury and pain better than anyone he knew. Of course he also knew how to cause it, but that was just a fun hobby. Avoiding it meant that he wasn't causing pain to a stranger he might never meet; causing his soulmate to be in pain and that was vital for Remus.

He knew through his childhood they'd have felt pain from him a lot, had a full collection of 'congratulations hope you find your soulmate while healing' cards. Those were what first made him realise how sadistic and cruel the world was to soulmates,especially before you met.

If he attacked someone they'd as likely get congratulations and suggestions to thank him as told to report the assault and he hated it. There should never be a celebration of causing pain to others. 

Since realising that Remus had ensured the only pain that could reach his soulmate from him was the sore throats he couldn't avoid. He was going to cherish his soulmate and keep them free from pain even before they met if he could. 

In all honesty there was so rarely any pain he felt in return that it seemed his soulmate was trying to do the same thing, at least before this week. This week Remus had been limping around, a phantom pain in his lower leg leaving him limping and struggling to walk as far as he had to for work.

“Remus, Have you been vandalising all of my injury cards again? I need to congratulate Virgil on his broken leg. You're coming with me too, since I've been trying to introduce you pair for literally ever. I know you don't have anything going on this afternoon, since you're pulling a sickie.” Roman yelled through the house, clearly still in his room if the bangs from drawers and cupboards being opened and shut was anything to go by.

“What kind of sick twisted jerk do you have to be to congratulate someone on getting injured? I don't care if he could find his soulmate, we should be hoping Virgil gets better soon, not praising him for however he got hurt!” Remus screeched, deciding to hop down the hall on his good leg and see how high he could hop.

Roman just glared over his shoulder, now kneeling to look under his bed. “It's what we do, what everyone does. Not that you seem to care about finding your soulmate. Do they even know you're still alive with how injury averse you are?”

“I care about not putting my soulmate in pain. Why the hell has this connection become societies excuse to get hurt, hurting soulmates in turn and not the way to protect and look after each other it was probably meant to be?” He'd never agree with his brother about the romance of sharing pain with someone else.

Once Roman had proclaimed that as soon as he found his love they would never feel pain again, and been completely flabbergasted when Remus suggested limiting the amount he hurts them ahead of time instead of waiting for the meeting. He'd had to watch his back and double check any of his art supplies for the next month after that argument, even after Remus took off on a skiing experience in Japan.

Roman's back bristled at the question, just as it always would. “Because your soulmate is your other half, someone who'll help smooth all your broken edges and complete you. Anyone sane would want to increase their chances of finding them.”

“I doubt Virgil would agree, given you said he's strapped up in hospital with a broken leg days after the accident that caused it.” Remus countered, before frowning again. “Why's he still in there anyway? Don't the hospitals usually just put a cast on you and let you leave for broken bones?”

Roman just shook his head, finally pulling out a blank card. “Something about the bone possibly getting shattered. A stack of heavy books falling on top of his legs can do that apparently, but I didn't ask for the details. Maybe I should try drawing Logan's book stack teetering above the congratulations?”

Remus groaned, turning away now. He should have known shredding or redesigning all the injury congratulations cards his brother had wouldn't work if he left the blank ones still around. That's a mistake he wouldn't be making again. When vandalising his brother's participation in societies sickness, get rid of all things possible to make cards out of.

Then again, he was actually curious about this Virgil guy Roman had befriended a few years ago. Perhaps he should actually go along to the hospital, as long as he could hobble along at his own pace. Remus even had a few fun outfits to wear for hobbling around.

/In the Hospital room\

Virgil was going to scream if another nurse, stranger or friend tried coming in to congratulate him on getting his leg broken. Bad enough the pain he was in, that surely, should his soulmate still be alive, was hurting them a lot to, but to act like it was a good thing? He was fuming at the idea.

So far Logan had been the only sane person to visit, apologising and promising to store his books more safely in the future. He hadn't stayed long though, only enough time to explain the provisions he'd made at their work to ensure Virgil kept his job while unable to walk and could return to it once release from hospital.

Roman opening the door carrying a congratulations balloon and a card only made the glare deepen. “Hey Virgil. Are you looking forward to trying to find your soulmate once you're released? I know some wonderful cafes we could sit in and watch for-” The words were cut off with a yelp when Virgil threw the notebook he'd been scribbling in at him.

“Are you seriously telling me I should be celebrating getting injured you empty headed, dust filled dreamer? I have a broken leg, far more pain than I've ever been in, and you think I should focus on finding romance or friendship with someone I've never met?” Virgil snapped, already looking around his bed for something else to throw.

“Of course. It's a fantastic-” Roman was cut off again by a pillow being thrown.

Virgil scowled at him, “Fantastic what? Response to someone I only guess at being alive still because of occasional phantom sore throats? Opportunity to torture someone I've never even met yet with pain I wouldn't wish on anyone else given I'm going through it myself?”

He could hear a lift opening somewhere down the hall since the door was still opened but just carried on yelling. “Or maybe all you think about is the fact that this worldwide obsession with getting hurt does more harm than good. A bruise is a good way to find a soulmate, or a tattoo, where the pain is controlled, and caused safely. Broken bones and ridiculous stunts that will end in injury are cruel! Especially given all the pain gets inflicted on a stranger! And that's what you're trying to congratulate me for! Have a braincell Roman, or would you prefer I ask Logan to throw those books at you? Holy hell, do you actually think I'm excited by the sight of the books that caused this freaking injury?” Virgil had caught a closer glimpse of the card and finally stopped yelling, dumbfounded by the idiocy Roman must have to actually have drawn them onto the card.

“Oh, so Roman does have a friend with some sense about them. I'm Remus and have been trying to stop this stupid congratulations thing for years.” A doppelganger of Roman was suddenly leaning against the door, grinning and panting a little.

Virgil paused for a moment, before nudging the chair beside his bed. “You injured yourself or something? You look like you've run a mile to get here.”

“Soulmate hurt their leg badly. Walking too much is a bit of a strain this week. Hope you get released from here soon though. It can't be fun spending your days in this place.” Remus limped over to the chair, collapsing into it with a sigh.

“Guessing you already know I'm Virgil if you're prince prats brother. Which leg got hurt?” Virgil smirked, realising Roman had fallen quiet now, given in just their few words it was clear Remus shared his views about the nonsense idea of congratulating people for injuries.

Remus glanced at the bed, wriggling his eyebrows, “Same leg as yours if you wanna try me out for a ride.”

“Roman, give me my notebook back. If your brother's going to flirt I need something to thwack him with.” Virgil ground out at the insinuation. He wasn't looking for his soulmate, and didn't care for getting hit on. Either that or he really needed another dose of pain reliever, hurting only ever made him more angry.

“Well that's one way to find out if we're soulmates, but I'm sworn not to get injured if I can avoid it. No pain for my soulmate at all. I can even tell the chances of a landslide on various slopes to decide whether I'll climb them or not.” Remus shifts as though to get out of the chair, grimacing in preparation for the pressure on his leg, despite the pain he'd mentioned being phantom.

Virgil reaches out with both arms then, one to shove Remus back down, and the other to take his notebook back from Roman. “Well then I guess you can keep dreaming of being my soulmate then. Since I try my best not to get injured too. If only save myself from the Roman's of the world.”

He smirked at the cackles that brought from the man beside him, while Roman protested. He was curious though, since it would be nice to be able to keep his soulmate safe in person, despite being well aware they were already experts at avoiding injury.

While Remus was still laughing he moved the hand still on his shoulder to pinch the back of his neck, flinching himself at the sting to his own neck. The gasp cutting off the laughter showed Remus had realised what he'd done too, turning to face him properly somehow in a jump while still sat down.

“So? Soulmates? Weirdly coinciding injury and phantom pain? Team destroy the congratulating cards?” Remus rattled off ideas for how they could be connected, eyes scanning over his face.

Virgil smiled, nodding. “Guess we are soulmates, and I should be apologising about all this.” He frowned again, realising just how much Remus's leg was probably hurting him, even through the phantom pains. “Do pain killers work on the soulmates thing?”

“We've got a while to figure that out! I don't think they'd work if I took them though. Let's call the nurse to give you some.” Remus was already jumping up and hurrying out of the room, or as fast as he could with his leg still in a lot of pain.

Roman watched him leave, before tilting his head at Virgil. “So am I going to get something thrown at me if I try to congratulate on finding your soulmate now?”

“Don't tempt me.” Virgil groaned out, realising he was never likely to lose the romantic now, and that entire scene could have just proven the use of injuries in finding soulmates, whatever arguments he and Remus had against it.

[purplerose244]

Irrational - Chapter 1: The first star in the morning

​Hello everyone!! The @spacecampweek is finally here!! 😍

I cannot wait to see all the content for these two math dorks! Here is my contribution, a collection of oneshots including all the prompts, starting with the first, “Stars”! ✨

Enjoy!! 💙💙

Summary: Seamus was going to smack that idiot of his best friend right in the head for putting him into this situation. A private moment with his little crush, sure, what a marvelous plan of his! There was only one thing he didn’t take into account: this space nerd’s absolutely terrible flirting techniques.

Read it on the AO3

“… have I… have I told you about that time I went for the tryouts of the basketball team?” Seamus huffed with superiority, mostly for the sake of breathing out some air on this overly hot day. “I’m sure you can tell, I’m a pretty athletic person. The only reason I didn’t join was because I needed to keep up my grades or whatever, school is a total pain.” He smirked towards his right. “Maybe I can bring you to the gym sometimes, teach you how to make three-pointers? I’m sure you’d like that.” His overly confident tone fell into oblivion, as silent kept prevailing. He could feel the sweat going down his neck, behind the high collar of his black jacket.

Good lord, he was wearing a leather jacket. A freaking. Leather. Jacket. When he thought this day couldn’t get any more awkward.

“Four.” Seamus jumped over his seat.

“Huh?”

“Four times.” At last, the Cantaloupian had finally raised his eyes from his phone, showing him the most annoyed look he had ever seen on a human being. “You have mentioned this casket sport of yours at least four times tonight. Merely to answer your question.” Without much of a nod or an impressed look, his pretty nose went back to the lightened-up screen. Never mind, this day had all the chances to get plenty of more awkward.

He was losing him. Oh gosh, he was totally blowing it.

This made no sense! Sure he and Tight Jeans Hank had gone out only a few times before he got head over heels for Mary, but he was totally into the three-pointer thing! Sure, making up an excuse after that on why they never actually went to the gym had been a little draining, a little shameful, but at least there was that! He wasn’t completely out of his game.

… was he? Quick, another one! Huh, what did work out with that one guy from math class before he discovered he liked astronomy better?

“Huh, uhm… you know one time we got Mrs. Janeth so mad I was called into the principal’s office, but I got out without a single problem! You didn’t expect me to be this much of a bad boy, didn’t you? Yeah, this math student is good with numbers as a cover, my call is… being… mischievous…” Oh the cringe. It was going to be all worth it if he got at least a change from the guy sitting at the passenger’s seat. “Heh, people still wonder how I did it.” He grinned towards him, wiggling his eyebrows. “I could tell you, but it has to be… our secret.” Wow. He was channeling his interior Steve. The only difference was that that knucklehead at least was actually good at sports and actually good at getting into troubles.

Heck, even Pepperjack was more of a rebel!

Ah. Silence. Not even the Cantaloupian checking his phone was making any noise.

“Uh-huh.” His eyes were still all over the screen. He didn’t even bother to give him a look this time. “Would not be much of a secret in that case, now would it.”

The blonde was starting to think there was some kind of massive secret stored into that device. His eyes fell on it. Nope, this guy was literally tapping onto apps and exiting them without doing anything. Seamus almost laugh at the awfulness of all, wondering if it was too late running out in the woods and hope his allergy was going to kill him sooner or later. Then he stumbled with his memory to Spring Fling, the date he got – that had spent most of the night making out with someone else in the bathroom, but still.

Alright, confident. An intriguing, intimidating guy, one Krel might wanna know better.

“W-well, the best part of having secrets is sharing it with others! Saying, see this bruise I have?” He pointed at his temple, panicking for a second to remember where it was. His mind went right, and he really hope he wasn’t just pointing at his cheek like an idiot. “I got into this massive fight after class, it was insane! I won’t bore you with details, the usual argument with those bozos from our rival school, but if you think this dent is bad you should see the other guys! Pretty cool huh?”

Silence again.

A sigh. It held together such an annoyed power it left him baffled for a second. Krel was narrowing his eyes so much they looked closed.

“Forgive me, I am still trying to master the art of sarcasm, so I will have to warn you beforehand: I am about to use it.” He cleared his voice. “Wow, that is impressive and totally not an idiotic behavior, thank you very much for telling me.” He made a very forced, very exaggerated smile, before dropping it while still looking at him and then going back at losing time on the phone.

More death wishes filled him. Seamus grimaced, sneezed, and checked if the windows were actually closed while grunting under his breath. He breathed through his nose, hands gripping the wheel simply to have something to do.

It was official. This was the worst first non-date of history, and it was all his fault.

… or Steve’s. Yeah, Steve’s fault sounded better.

The ground of the woods was most likely all over the wheels of dad’s car which was going to drive him mad once again, the occasional sniff of pollen into the air had been making his eyes tear up even since they got here – the windows were actually closed, how, stupid allergy –, and he was stuck there ruining all the chances he never had in the first place. Yes, it made so much more sense blaming that good for nothing jock. The only reason Seamus was there in the first place was because his Vespa was out of service – he had said something something creeper walking on the crosswalk, he had stopped listening at some point –, and he had promised his girlfriend to go back to the kissing tree as soon as the situation was calmer or whatever. Seamus, being the good friend he was – especially since Logan was grounded –, had joined in to give them a lift and wait in the car for the two lovebirds to have their mushy moments, feeling extremely single in the process.

When he had seen Aja and Steve getting out of the Tarron’s residence, Seamus had waved.

When he had seen coming along as well none other than Krel Tarron, he had briefly considered pushing onto the accelerator and leaving everyone and everything into the dust. His body had not complied – the traitor. The happy couple had positioned themselves in the back seats, with Aja saying her little brother had decided not to be a recluse for tonight, while the Cantaloupian genius had comfortably seated himself next to him, giving a smile.

A smile.

How dare he? A smile!?

It was Steve’s fault, it definitely was. There was no way Krel would have come out of his own will, it was notorious he despised social gatherings with intellectually inferior people – mood – and hated nature even more – bigger mood. His sister had never been able to convince him before, he knew that because Steve had made it a habit narrating his escapades with Aja after every single date, and it had always started with “We left the buttsnack home and…”. The first time Seamus offered a ride home to the two of them, and magically the little crush he had only confided to Steve and Logan – and Mary but Mary was gossip queen so that didn’t count – had decided to tag along with them. Suspicious, very suspicious.

So, there they were. They had been stuck into his car for an hour at least now, waiting to check if Aja and Steve planned on staying here for longer or eventually head back. Seamus really hoped for the second. He had no idea how the tension had raised up to this point, nothing was working! Krel was barely acknowledging him, and he was starting to wonder why he decided to join in in the first place. Maybe he lost a bet with Steve or something, that would have explained it.

… it did explain it. He was here against his will, with him, having the worst time of his life. Seamus pressed his lips together, the silence weighting onto his stomach. Maybe he could ask something else? What more anecdotes did he have left? The full score at Alex, getting kicked out of Sam’s…

… why was he feeling worse?

His phone vibrated right there. He had no doubt who was disturbing and judging by the sudden vibration from Krel’s phone the other half of the couple was sending similar messages.

THEPalchuk: Hey man

THEPalchuk: Me and Aja are staying around more

THEPalchuk: Pick us up in one hour?

THEPalchuk: Thanks you’re the best!

Great, like he wasn’t currently questioning his flirting skills as much as his entire persona. What was left in his repertoire? Nothing was helping so far, maybe he needed another approach. What choice did he have though? His stories were usually somehow effective, being like Steve didn’t seem better, Mary just so happened to have guys always in line for her for whatever reason, what else could he…

“Johnson?” He held back another jump, because Krel was finally looking at him and it was progress and- “Would it be too much bother if I asked you to bring me back home?”

Oh. Oh.

In his head played the game over soundtrack from GoGo Sushi. Dang it. He wished he had more time to prepare for this day, but right now it felt like it was inevitable. He definitely did something, said something weird. Was there even a possibility in the first place? With someone like him? He had met Krel Tarron in between classes on a completely random day: the guy had completely destroyed Mrs. Janeth’s theory about triangles without breaking a sweat, had broken into the science lab apparently making a mess of the only functioning computer, and had gotten sent to the principal at the end of the day as a result, without getting into troubles afterwards. This guy had managed to be an absolute nonconformist and a shameless rebel… using math.

Yeah, he was on another level, there was no point. He was so going to scream at Steve on organizing this, it was meant to go bad. Worst of all, it didn’t feel like he could get over it anytime soon. Maybe because it was something that didn’t even start.

He started the car, holding back a sigh.

“No problem, right away.” Krel gave him a mild grateful smile, and Seamus felt the urge to cry.

The trip back was somehow even more awkward than the hour spent waiting. Not necessarily for the deadly silence still permeating the car, mostly for the amount of thoughts that were running wildly into his head. What now? He didn’t even know if the Cantaloupian had noticed his attempts at flirting, did he reject him or was he simply so bored he couldn’t take it anymore? Did it matter? The natural consequence was to stay as far away as possible and ignore his entire existence during high school, then get into the furthest college possible – Australia sounded good – and forget about finding love forever. Sure Krel was in most of his classes, and that guy was most likely going to be an Elite student with him and Claire, which meant they were going to be paired up for some stupid vanity event of the school; also he happened to be his best friend’s girlfriend’s brother, so no way it was the last he was ever going to see him, but he could deal with it.

He could… deal with it…

… he didn’t want to, though. He didn’t want to stop talking to him or stop wishing to talk to him. That guy was in sync with his friends, he was so smart it was unbelievable, he was fun to be around and even right now that the embarrassment was at its peak, Seamus couldn’t help noticing how pretty he was, somehow even in the act of ignoring his existence. In light of all of this, was this really the only way to go? It always was with the other guys…

There was a stop ahead. He respected it, lightly biting his lip. No, with all the others he never made contact after failure because he never cared for it, because they weren’t good people, and because he didn’t want to admit how much he had made up for the sake of one terrible date. He could reach a compromise, right? To be able to talk with him. Nothing in between, only the truth.

His very dorky, uncool truth.

He continued to drive, pondering over everything, only to notice a parking spot next to the crosswalk. He went, noticing the other’s weird look on him. He hurried to speak before he could.

“I’ve never been at the tryouts.” Krel fully turned to him, eyes widened.

“… what?” Seamus winced, rubbing his neck.

“The basketball thing? I never did it. I wanted to, I’m really not bad at it… but I didn’t finish homework for that day and my dad didn’t let me.” Ah, there it came, the absolute shame – gently provided by Mr. Johnson, trademark. “The grades stuff, that’s kinda the excuse I always use whenever someone ask me why I’m not in the team. It’s not exactly a lie, but it’s better than saying I have no freedom at all.” The Cantaloupian looked baffled. The blonde took it as a chance to keep going. “As for the principal call, you wanna actually know the secret? I was never in trouble in the first place, Mrs. Janeth wanted to personally congratulate for making it into the International Mathematical Olympiad. I didn’t want people to think I was lame.” Gosh it burned. It felt kinda nice but it was also awful. He sighed at the end, pointing at his temple. “And about this? The fight? As if, I tripped on my way to the planetarium… because I love space… and there people don’t make fun of me for it.” Oh. He didn’t mean that last one, he didn’t want it to hurt. It still did. Not even Steve or Logan knew why he had been keeping his passion lowkey only for close friends.

It was good… it was good, right? It was as genuine as he could get, because despite everything he still wanted to be able to look at him in the eyes without second guessing himself. He was a lame-o who could barely do anything without his dad’s approval, he was an absolute nerd who was good at math only because he had to, and he was a dork with an absolute passion for space that got him so much mockery in the past, before he started to mock back.

A leaf flew over the windshield of the car. He could feel his sweat turning into ice. Was it too late after all? He lost his chance with Krel even at being a friend? He could feel his eyes on him.

It was silence. Then, a long sigh of relief came from him.

“Oh thank Seklos, I was convinced you were being serious before.”

… huh?

“Huh?” He looked at him. Krel was smiling. He was… smiling? “Before?”

“You were turning into an even bigger oaf than Steve is, which is quite the accomplishment let me tell you.” He looked down, finally putting away his phone. Despite wishing for it the entire time, Seamus felt a wave of anxiety rushing over. “I knew for a fact that I was going to be in your company during the entire time, given that the Staja is a force too chaotic to be around without risking someone’s life.” Despite the tension the blonde snorted. The Cantaloupian seemed to like that. “I was even looking forward to it. I’ve always wondered about the sleeping guy from class.”

Holy. Freaking. Mole.

Seamus was agape, he was pretty sure his jaw was dislocated without repair. He wasn’t sure if this was actually happening, or the last sniff of pollen had put him into a state of hallucination – he didn’t mind trading an anaphylactic shock for this. He managed to breathe again after a while, trying to remember how to speak words.

“Wait- You- I… you were watching me too?” Ah, why the too, why did he have to admit of staring at him while trying to stay awake during class? Why was he such a-

Wow. Wow. Was that embarrassment?

Coming from the prideful Krel Tarron?

“I was… mildly checking.” Okay, this was definitely a coma-induced dream, no way he was that lucky – and could this guy stop looking this adorably shy, he needed his heart to come back to life. “You always raise your hand when Mrs. Janeth asks something, even before the question has been said. You seem to be constantly bored during the lesson, which I can completely understand. You seem to be one of the few people who can at least dream to measure up with me in regard of intellect.” Mm, maybe this was actually real, somehow that came out extremely irritating and incredibly endearing at the same time. “I was interested into knowing that person tonight… I have not seen him for now.” His eyes went down, a little bitterly.

He was going to care about that in a moment. First, his mind needed to compute. What was happening here? Were Steve and Logan into this? Were they following him with a black car from afar ready to scare the crap out of him as soon as he was going to believe that a guy this cool actually wanted to know the real him?

… jeez, he really needed to work onto his self-esteem.

Besides, it was Krel, the frankest person he had ever met. There was no way he was pretending, he was so sure it almost scared him.

Apparently, this was happening, this was a meeting of some sort. One that for now, he had been screwing up big time. He was trying so hard to be liked, trying the best that had worked before, but did it work really? He had never actually been in a relationship, every single guy had evaporated as soon as they had found something better to do than hang out with this weird space nerd. Instead, Krel was waiting. Krel was there to actually know about that part of him.

The real him.

“… are you really in a hurry to come back home?” He got a confused stare. But if he really had something close to a chance, he was fine with making it interesting. “In case not… could I arrange a meeting?” He forced a very nervous smile. “Between you and him?”

Krel looked at him in surprise.

Then he smiled. He smiled.

“Alright, one more chance. Make it count, Johnson.”

His father would have not liked how fast he was driving, even while making sure to respect all signs – he wasn’t that reckless, even if the idea of bothering his old man was tempting. It wasn’t a long trip anyway, he knew the way by heart at this point. Arcadia soon got less lived around them and started to raise up, into a road leading higher and higher while surrounded by those dang trees. His passenger was looking out of the window, clearly curious but without asking a single thing. Seamus didn’t mind it. Maybe he just wanted to appreciate the moment for now, having him intrigued by the situation, before something went wrong again.

No. No. No more screwing everything, not this time. He could make this work.

The planetarium was there almost too soon, as he had only started to notice the eyes of the Cantaloupian occasionally drifting from the glass to him, equally intense. He placed the car into a completely empty parking lot, got out and breathed in. At least here there was way less vegetation, he could almost take a full breath without coughing. He quickly went over Krel’s side, opening the door for him and offering his hand.

He got a weird look in return, a little smile and a tan hand into his. Seamus really didn’t want this to be the first and last time.

“Have you ever been at Arcadia’s planetarium?”

“I am familiar, not a frequent visitor though. I was here for the Science Fair, and once in the first days since I land- got here.” He stumbled a little and focused on looking around, frowning. “I did not find anything particularly interesting though. Only incorrect.”

“Oh, if you’re up for a conversation about mistakes made into the planetary system I’m all ears, but let’s get inside first. I’m bringing you somewhere special.” He walked towards the building, aiming for the back of it, hoping that the occasional cat had decided to do its stuff somewhere else, at least for tonight. Only halfway there it hit him that their hands were still united. He was actually holding his hand. The realization made his body tremble. “Huh, I…” He looked over his shoulder, trying to think how to ask someone if it was okay to hold hands while already doing it in order not to make him go away – why was his brain always this convoluted?

Krel blinked at him, with those pretty brown eyes of his. There was such a control into those irises, smarts and brilliance but not only. It was the kind of look that had seen much, stuff he probably couldn’t even understand. There was simply something that made him want to know more about him.

He clenched his hold. Seamus could feel his heart doing backflips.

“What is it?” This mischievous genius smirked. Absolutely aware. What a day was this day.

“… nothing.” Seamus grinned back, starting to accept that from now on everything was going to be absolutely mind-blowing. “I have been here so many times, and if I know something is that the employees here are… really bad at their job.” He eyed the backdoor. Then the doormat. A freaking doormat, what a cliché. “I swear, one could break in and they would barely notice.” Reluctantly he let go of his hand, slipped it underneath the obvious hiding spot and got the key.

“That is really careless. Although having access to this place could be useful, I did see some interesting components for potential devices last time I was here.”

“Dang, you’re a dangerous one… wait, you’re an inventor?”

“In a way, I’m mostly an engineer.” Total. Heart eyes. “How did you discover this entrance?”

“I used to be a kid who barely had friends, hate with passion staying at my own house and I wished for nothing more than to climb onto a rocket and leave the planet to explore the entire galaxy.” Huh. It used to sound way less edgy when he was younger. “At some point dad discovered that he could leave me here with an adult and he was able to go by his day doing business or whatever without a problem, so I spent a lot of time around here. It gets easier to discover tricks when you’re a kid.” He unlocked the door, bowing at the other. “After you, Mr. Rebel.”

Krel rolled his eyes with a smirk, getting in.

It was as silent and dark as he expected it to be. Also empty, as he expected the nightguard had ditched his job once again – he mentally thanked his careless of tonight. He had been there enough to memorize even the vague noise of the neon, it was echoing into his ears even now that the lights were off. He took out his phone, brightening the way for them to walk. He barely had to think about it, his feet already knew where to step and what poster to pass by, even in complete darkness. His attention was mostly on the guy following him anyway… he was bringing a guy to his special place. He was bringing a guy into his stupidly nerdy corner in this stupidly nerdy place he had adored ever since he was a kid. He was actually doing it.

Wow, Mary would have screamed murder at him for being this uncool. He decided he could deal with her fits later. For now, the projector room.

It pleased him the look of Krel’s face, as it was genuinely the first time he had been there. There were so many seats, the projector was in the middle of the room. It was dark, but the glass dome above them gave a bit of a view over the night sky. Nothing else, absolute simplicity. It was so peaceful here. It made him sigh of relief every single time.

Right now though, it was enough silence to hear his own heartbeats, as the Cantaloupian’s curious eyes went all over the room. He really wanted to be up to his expectations.

“Fascinating.” He looked up to the sky view. “What is the purpose of this place?”

“You’ll see.” Seamus took off that awful jacket of his with a certain satisfaction and put it onto one of the seats. He patted the one next to him. “Give me a moment.” Krel obeyed, taking place, while the blonde went over the controls. He had seen it plenty of times, he had done it as well. Only a few controllers, along with the audio guide. “Get ready for the show!” He hurried to take place where he had left the piece of clothes, deliberately sitting on it – he never wanted to see it again, at least until winder, screw being cool or whatever.

A very familiar excitement took over when the first stars appeared, manifesting the galaxy as a whole. So many points made of light, further than his mind could ever go, yet so reachable in a way his mind couldn’t explain. Soon enough planets came into view as well, Saturn first in all of its beauty, showcasing the rings into the black space.

He took a breath, feeling the familiarity of the place… and something more.

“Space, the ever-present dome of endless wonder,” The audio guide roared through the video, toning it down a little had been a good idea. He remembered when he was a kid, and he had been so conflicted between putting his hands over his ears or risking becoming deaf only for the sake of knowing more about the universe. “And just when you think the universe can’t get any more mysterious…” He knew that explanation by heart at this point.

So he noticed the change nearby. He thought he was imagining it, because it wasn’t the first time the thought had hit him. Then his fingers met others, his heart screamed, and he decided that no dream of his had ever been this vivid.

“I like this place.” Krel was talking softly, close to his ear. It sent a shiver onto his back.

“H-happy to hear.” He let their fingers intertwine, trying to focus less on how everything could end up so horribly and more on how enjoyable everything was. He could live this moment, without thinking of the bad possible outcome. “… you know, the planets got colored like that to appeal the kids I think. The first time I watched it I’ve already studied my kiddie book about planets, and I was so disappointed that they weren’t being accurate.” He snickered, letting his eyes wander on how the celestial corpses were moving in circles. “Thinking that there is so much out there…”

“Yeah… so much.” Krel breathed out. “Galaxies so distant, Earth might never get the chance to reach. Everything is so far from everything here.” His tone had gone down a little, pensive.

The audio guide continued, Seamus was unconsciously moving his mouth along the description that was already stuck into his head. Krel had gone completely silent, even though his warm was still into his. The blonde had no idea what was going on in that impressive brain of his, but whatever it was, he didn’t want to stay away from it.

With his free hand he pointed at the projection, the fragment with all the stars.

“You know, I used to think that space was a little scary. It’s so vast and we humans will probably never live long enough to see it all.” He smiled, remember the stories about the stars his mom used to read for him. “Then I discovered how far stars are, and that from every single planet of the Milky Way the constellations all look the same. It’s like they reach all those places.”

“… what about beyond that?” Krel swallowed, clenching his hold. “What if there are even further planets out there?”

“Well, stars are many lightyears away from here, and one lightyear is 5.8 trillion miles. That’s one heck of a trip.” He got a look that said ‘I knew that’ and laughed, making him smile a little too. “All I’m saying is that, at least for a part of the galaxy, the sky will look the same. And even if we discovered even further away planets where they don’t know about Andromeda or Sagittarius, there will be other stars over there, reaching out for other places, but stars nonetheless.” The projection changed again, coming back to Earth. “As far as one can go, there are still things that feels like home, you know? That’s why, even though it’s terrifying, I kind of can’t wait to know if there’s more out there.” His throat felt lighter. Oh. He had rarely ever been able to say, was this ok-

Oh. Oh. He was wrong, Krel had never smiled before, not this evening, not even a single time. Because this was his real smile, a radiant curve with those lucid eyes, reflecting the light of the projector. He turned to him, and Seamus almost gasped out of the view alone.

Beautiful. Krel Tarron was really beautiful.

“That is a comforting thought.” His voice wasn’t far anymore, it got back some vigor. “So, this is the real you?” Seamus swallowed. Right, it all came down to that.

“I guess so… yeah, pretty much.”

“Good. I like this Seamus much better than the other one.” Okay, calm down. He was simply making a comparison with how jerky he was before. No need to get all riled up by his wording. “Although I am not completely convinced about the situation, perhaps this matter needs to be deepen on another occasion. Perhaps in another place, at another time… with the two of us.” Okay, no calming down, forget all the rationality he was so going to freak out.

It took him a moment. Then, mustering all of his courage at facing the last doubt that he was going to get slapped or laughed at as soon as he turned, he looked at the guy sitting next to him. No laugh. No slap. Not at all.

“Does… does that mean… another date? A-a proper one?” The Cantaloupian’s shrug said maybe, his extremely wide grin said yes. Seamus was too happy to care about the mocking intention. “Huh, uh, uhm.” Answer stupid, answer! “Yes. That is… sure, why not, it sounds good.” He so needed to work on his communication skills, especially since he was about to meet him so much more from now on – holy everything he just got a date out of Krel Tarron didn’t he. “I can pick you up one of these days, we can go to Sam’s or something…” Wow, a diner, such a romantic place for a date. “O-or something else, maybe I should ask Steve about idea- Oh, dang it!”

Krel’s expression fell. Oh, apparently he wasn’t the only one questioning himself.

“What is it? Is it no good?”

“Oh, no way, it’s nothing! I’m happy!” He straightened his back, glad that they were still holding hands despite everything. “It’s just that… urgh, I hate when Steve’s right about something, he gets super unbearable. Now the fact that he arranged the whole thing and it actually worked will be his biggest accomplishment, not looking forward to that.” He could already see the t-shirts ‘I got this buttsnack a date’ with his face on it. With that being said, it seemed almost an overly fair trade, weeks of mockery coming from that guy for a single date with the Cantaloupian.

Who was staring at him with an arched brow, slowly straightening his back with a wince – yeah, his own back wasn’t doing much better, these chairs were pretty uncomfortable.

“What do you mean he arranged this?” How subtle Steve was?… could Steve actually be subtle?

“Well, you know, it’s pretty evident.” Seamus scratched his cheek with his free hand, laughing a little. “He was the one knowing about my… uhm, interest in you.” Nice understatement. Those brown eyes widened. “The day I offer him a lift with my car you come along, there’s not much else to deduce here.” It was weird that someone this observant hadn’t noticed the coincidence.

Krel was smiling, again, and his cheeks were lightly red. It almost stopped his heart. Then he frowned, like another thought had taken over his more pleasant one.

“You think Steve pushed me to come today?” Seamus blinked. That was a weirdly worded question. He simply nodded. “What makes you think that?”

“Please, that guy would do anything to make me in the situation to make an absolute fool of myself! Granted, I didn’t need much of his help at this turn.” Krel was still blinking, looking baffled. “Besides, who else would’ve cared for this? I don’t think your sister knew about me, Logan is out of the picture tonight, and I’d be terrified if Mary actually managed to be involved without… what? What is it?” The guy was staring so intently, it was hard keeping track with that kind of look.

The hold clenched again. Krel was focused on nothing but him.

“I am simply a little taken back. I thought the fact that I came along only when you were there would have given away my intentions.” His inten- Oh. Oh. That syllabus must had shown onto his face because Krel laughed. He laughed and it was beautiful, even though his brain was having a grand hard time at functioning. “Steve simply said you were there to give him a ride, it was a good occasion. A plan of mine at least.” Still not functioning. “Speaking of, perhaps we should let them know we might be a little late at picking them up. I am in no hurry to leave anymore.” Still hardly understanding. “You are perhaps a little less brilliant than you think you are, Seamus Johnson.” Still non computing. Krel stared at him, right into his eyes. “But you are a nicer company than you might believe to be.” He got closer. Not functioning, not computing not-

Cheek, kiss.

Kiss cheek, cheeky kiss, kiss on the cheek with kiss-

Krel was kissing his cheek.

It was warm and soft, and it made his brain absolute short-circuit. Their noses almost brushed when he pulled away, and Krel’s hair moved a little, lightly smelling like metal. He was an inventor, he said. What else? What else was this person was? He really wanted to know, he really wanted to ask. All he could muster right now though was some sort of whimper, that made the Cantaloupian giggle some more, before getting back on his seat while still holding his hand.

The audio guide’s voice was still as powerful as ever, and at the meteor section something into his head woke up. Seamus realized that, once again, he wasn’t hallucinating. He couldn’t reach his warm cheek with his free hand without looking incredibly awkward but it was fine. It was okay, absolutely okay, and he couldn’t stop grinning because of it.

Turned out, it wasn’t Steve’s fault. It was Krel’s fault.

He was more than happy to go along with it.

[craftypeaceturtle]

Bewitching

Summary: Roman and his trusted friend, Logan, embark on a journey to visit their local witch. 

Note: I was inspired by a post that described this like exact concept. This is just a small fic that struck me! I have no idea why I am only capable of writing rare pair fics but hey ho! At least I’m writing. Analogical and Royality. 

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“Do you even understand where we’re supposed to be going?” Logan muttered as he tried to massage away his upcoming headache. Unfortunately his headache bounded into his side with a wide smirk. 

“Of course! It’s only a simple path through Sanders Woods,” Roman announced as he continued marching through the castle with proud wide steps.

“Do I even need to deconstruct how vague those directions truly are?” 

“Pfft! I’m not an idiot Logan. I do have a map. You just follow through the main path through Sanders Woods but then at some specific stump or something stupid, you turn and then boom! Witches!” Roman wiggled the paper in his face but even that movement didn’t hide that it was just some rushed notes on a napkin from his father. It looked like just simple lines and labels. There wasn’t even an compass pointing north! 

“Ah I stand corrected then, your majesty. Truly you must be a true scholar in the geologies,” Logan sighed and Roman checked his shoulder.  

They were being sent on the incredibly (vague, according to Logan) journey to go track down the kingdom’s local witch to re-establish their trade. A journey that sounded very important and essential so when Logan first heard it, of course he immediately offered his service. The warning sign should have been that Roman was conducting the journey. Another warning sign (as there were many), was the fact that to re-establish their trade, they were trading a kitten and were expecting to get cookies in return. It all painted the very obvious picture that the king wanted his son to do his chores and so asked his friend to ensure the task got done. But then again, Logan prided himself as a man of honour and he wouldn’t refuse to conduct on this journey. He was nobler than this pettiness. He was more serious than any one of the royal family members. He would take great pride in this stupid task.

“Logan!” Roman shouted, Logan whipped round to face him, “Do you mind leaving the kitten alone for at least one second and help me pick out an outfit?”

“Pick an outfit?” Logan squealed indignantly, ignoring his own burning blush as he followed Roman into his room, leaving the poor mewing kitten to sprawl around its basket, “What’s wrong with what you’re wearing?”

He was wearing his typical outfit which was his full princely attire. A pristine white tunic with gold embellishments that all highlighted the strong red of the emblem on his sleeves. He would usually wear a bright red sash across his chest but instead he was flinging it about like a child first trying to learn ballet. But now he blushed bright enough to match the emblem. “We’re meeting new people. Of course a prince should always present their best foot forward.”

“Oh all princes?”

“Okay, don’t pretend that’s fair! We all know that Remus is an octopus dressed as a prince. He shouldn’t be considered along with all other princes!” 

“An octopus?” Logan chuckled.

“Dad got at me for constantly calling him a rat so I’m calling him an octopus. Just as ugly but this time dad thinks it’s just some weird nickname,” Roman said way too proudly for someone who was in his twenties and definitely above sibling squabbles. Then again this was indeed Roman. 

“Ah, you are just so charming and intelligent, your majesty,” Logan smirked before he also bumped their shoulders, “But don’t think that will distract me. Please promise me that you will not flirt with the witch.”

“It’s not flirting! It’s called being friendly, not that you would know that Intronerd!” 

“It’s definitely flirting. And it definitely taints any and all official communication. Do I even need to retell the event with Janus?”

“Right! I’m all ready to go, are you?” Roman bellowed, rushing past him with a satchel of bare essentials. Logan simply sighed and carefully cradled the basket with the kitten. 

It was just after midday and they were finally on their way, the guards around the castle grounds waved with barely hidden laughs. Roman frowned at them and clutched Logan to his side. He was well aware of his reputation around the castle. Foolish and way too optimistic. It stung each time but then Roman knew himself better than any guard could. Plus he could always sick Remus on them! But he also knew Logan was quickly getting mixed in with that reputation. A truly genuine travesty to this world. Logan was a bold, determined and so quietly compassionate but he was only regarded as dumb and easily flustered. And Roman could get it! Like yeah, seeing this emotionless guy walk out of the grounds cradling a kitten was funny, but he knew Logan well enough to laugh at how lovey he was really. They just laughed at the ditzy dumb consort who pretended to be cold and collected. Yet Logan always remained oblivious and Roman would risk his life to ensure it would remain that way. 

He wished he could say it was a beautiful summer’s morn with the birds chirping their victory as they headed into the deep mysterious forest. But instead the sky was a striking grey with a wind that was just the wrong side of cold. Reports stated it would rain in the afternoon and he was unfortunately momentarily defeated by the allure of sleeping in so he couldn’t leave early enough. Meh, he was pretty sure Logan appreciated the extra hours to sit around doing nothing! He waved the famous royal wave to a bunch of children who scattered at their approach with amazed giggles while Logan did his usual Logan thing of keeping his eyes forward and walking away before they could talk. Perhaps it was for the best, they had to focus. 

Well... ‘focus’. The journey was important and all but also this tiny little ginger kitten snuggling into Logan’s muscly bulky arms was very distracting. 

The path into the woods was very simple. It was a worn away path in the grass that become wider and wider each time he saw it. It was pretty much a very wonky lane straight through the forest and the map clearly presented an equally wonky line to a blackened tree stump that “they could not miss”. Then turn left and, as he eloquently put it, boom! Witch. In all honesty, the journey was the very last thing on his mind currently. Sanders Woods was big but it was so close to the kingdom that there was never anything too dangerous in there- people travelled through it every day. But, Roman prided himself on his studies into the kingdom’s history and all the fables and stories that it inspired. It didn’t take a genius to know that witches meant trouble. Witches cursed and violently lashed out at any hero that came their way. 

He stared up at Logan out of the corner of his eye. Logan looked the part certainly with his official royal uniform and he was fairly built. But Roman also knew Logan. While he could look intimidating, he was anything but. At the first sign of conflict he would freeze, and even if he didn’t, he was in no way trained for battle. He looked built but his muscle purely came from grabbing heavy books from high shelves. He wouldn’t last a second against a witch in a physical battle.

“How have your studies been going?” Roman innocently asked innocently.

“As expected, why?”

“What do you mean why! I can be interested in your studies! What are you learning about now? It was magic right?” Roman kept his focus on his light marching steps. Logan huffed a chuckle.

“Magic is such a broad term I don’t even know how to go about correcting you. Yes, I have largely been studying magic. It is...” Logan scrunched his face up, “going, to put realistically. I’m struggling to fully grip the module I am currently on. But overall, my study of magic is going better than I first thought. How are your studies? Are you studying anything right now?” Logan raised an eyebrow.

“Not really. I finished the whole economics junk and I have a bit of a break before I launch back into studies. Trying to make the most of it,” Roman answered honestly but he kept his gaze straight ahead, “Anyway, what kind of magic are you doing? Like any... cool spells?” 

“Cool... spells...” Logan said, stopping completely in his path, “Why are you so interested?”

“As I said! I can be interested in what my friend is doing!” 

“You haven’t ever before taken interest in my, how did you put it, ‘nerdy junk’!” 

“Well!” Roman snarked back but he could feel Logan looking right through him, “It’s just important to know what kind of magic you can do. Just in case we ever n-”

“You think this is dangerous don’t you!” Logan gasped, feeling panic slam into his chest. 

“What?” Roman nervously laughed off, “No...”

“You do!” Logan dramatically pointed at him, “Oh we don’t have nearly the right supplies for any kind of conflict! We’re carrying around a cat!” 

“It won’t be dangerous!” Roman tried to soothe while panickily pacing. 

“I asked you! I asked you! I asked and you said that it was a simple trade. That we are practically just acting as postmen!” Logan threw his head back. 

“I’m sorry!” Roman gasped.

“You’ve got your sword. Plus, I really don’t think your dad would send us on some dangerous journey without at least some back up. I think you just got into your head with worry. There’s lots of rumours about witches despite those spreading them having never met a witch, we should be fine,” Logan answered softly. There was no use having them both panicking when they were already significantly through the woods. But then again maybe they could turn back now before they truly prove themselves to be idiots. 

“Yeah!” Roman lit up and snapped up straight with an obnoxious smile, “C’mon, we’ll be fine!”

Logan simply ran through his warning signs he listed earlier about how this task was a stupid chore. His hand found the kitten’s fuzzy little forehead and he gave some scritches before following in Roman’s footsteps. 

It was another hour where each minute felt more and more uncomfortable. They were a decent way through the woods but they had yet to see anything resembling a tree stump. Even Roman was now flicking his gaze behind him, checking to see if they had perhaps passed it without realising. Logan was practically chanting about how King Thomas wouldn’t send his idiot of a son on a difficult journey without a proper map. But then again both of his sons were idiots so maybe he just chose Roman as the lesser of two evils? Maybe the wobbly scrawled line on the map was just longer than expected. This was why people added scales and a compass! Eventually they paused at a blackened tree. They didn’t even talk or notice the other had paused as well. 

“Maybe by stump they more meant a stumpy tree?” Roman cautiously looked around. 

“Did your father not describe it any more than that?” Logan asked, still not convinced.

“I mean he even drew it in black!” Roman yelled out in what was supposed to be confidence. Logan winced as Roman marched slowly forward into the treeline.

“That cannot be where the line is. That map should never be considered as accurate or, or- just slow down Roman. We have no idea if this is the right direction!”

“Yeah well, we literally just go left into the trees. If it turns out to be wrong then we know which direction we went and just go back.”

Logan sighed at the legitimate logic the illogical prince presented, “It’s going to rain soon.”

“Well hurry up then!” Roman had already started running into the woods and Logan grumbled out some swears before reluctantly trudging after him. 

Now underneath the thick canopy of the woods, it was quite dark and moody. Roman tried to lighten the mood by pointing out every single squirrel that skittered away when they passed but even that didn’t fix the tension. The ideas of danger were swirling uncomfortably through them. The kitten was now restless and was mewing very pathetically. Logan winced at each quiet mew and Roman knew that it was a matter of seconds before Logan demand they go back and get the kitten to safety. And he was about to agree until he saw a tiny mushroom on a tree.

It softly glowed, and if that wasn’t a strong enough indicator of magic and witches, it was illuminous purple. It almost seemed transparent as black smoke billowed underneath it’s surface but it still somehow glowed brightly. 

“Logan, I think we’re almost there,” Roman muttered and tugged him forward.

“Roman.” Logan stopped them dead in the path. He was shifting and looking away but his back was straight and his posture screamed listen. Roman, of course, stopped in his tracks. “What if they use the cat... like... what if they kill the cat?”

Roman paused. That... would be very in character for witches. The kitten was frumpily stomping around and of course released an adorable mew as if it very well knew they were talking about it. “We’ve got to establish trade routes... Maybe we could be the ones to persuade them to see the light and understand cuteness and love for all living things!”

“Hmm.” Logan took the lead and stepped forward. 

They had walked for another ten minutes but yet the woods felt unrecognisable. The woods went from very stereotypical brown and green woods that seemed to stretch onwards forever. Now the mushrooms were everywhere and they couldn’t see the trunks of the trees anymore. The forest was filled with an overwhelming nauseating swirls of colours. Now they were seeing flashes of deer and groans from toads under their feet. The sun was completely blocked from the trees and it was almost like walking inside a building. 

It wasn’t long until they stumbled finally into a cottage looking house. A thatched roof and everything. It almost blended in, blackened charred wood with no windows or even sign of anyone living there. Dead leaves were still swamped up again its sides like it was still autumn. Logan cradled the kitten tighter and Roman couldn’t exactly blame him. 

It seemed straight out of a storybook. 

When the main characters stumble into the villain’s lair. 

Roman gulped and latched on arm on to Logan’s shoulder, which Logan happily sank into. They approached the door in timid steps. The wind harshly ripped through the forest, whipping around the wet clumps of leaves around the sunken door. The rain finally arrived and a few drops pattered on the ceiling of leaves. Logan stuttered in his steps but Roman winced and guided him forward. 

As they were a few metres from the door, it slammed open. 

“AAAH!” They both shrieked. 

A witch stood there... kinda proudly. He had a wide stance and the hood hid his face. But also his arms were crossed and he was hunched over to look extra small. He probably reached Roman’s shoulder standing straight... he looked like the wind around his house would knock him over. But also the billowing black cloak and clenched fists also spoke for themselves. “What are you doing here!” A whiny voice broke through their panic. 

Logan was clearly frozen and his mind only screaming about the kitten in his arms. It took a few moments for Roman to realise he wasn’t going to snap out and talk. He stuttered out, “Oh ah... hello there. We are fr- We come from the kingdom of Sanders to present a trading opportunity. I understand you have been in discussion with our king to re-establish our long ancient trading with you, Witch.”

The witch frowned, “Oh I’m not a witch. That’s Patton you’re looking for.”

He pointed over his shoulder to a cottage past his house. Now this looked like the idyllic cottage countryside house. Thatched roof, pristine pastel pink house and a beautiful neat line of wild bluebells. Roman found himself drawing near it without realising. It looked beautiful and the house straight out of his dreams. “Oh sorry sir! C’mon Logan, we’ll sort this out!” Roman tugged his arm but Logan remained statue still. “Uh, Logan?”

Logan was completely trapped under the gaze of the random civilian that stumbled into.  His chest glowed along with his bright red face. The man had very strong features and was clearly much more awkward than anything dangerous. It took a minute before he realised that words were needed if he was just going to stare, “Oh H-hi, I’m Lo...” He winced but tried to battle through, “Y-you’re not a witch?”

“Nah, I’m... I guess you’d call it emo and just hate people,” The guy awkwardly chuckled as he stepped out from his doorway. Logan allowed himself to smile and only just remembered Roman’s advice to puff out his chest and show himself off. Right, time to sweep this handsome man off his feet. 

“Ah I understand that sentiment. People can be so frustrating and exhausting.” The man walked forward before he awkwardly looked away.

“Uh can I?” The man asked with his hand out stretched towards his chest. Logan burst into a childish smile. Maybe Roman was right and he is handsome! All that heavy book lifting did pay off if cute emos then wanted to feel up his chest! Maybe he can sweep someone off their feet. Maybe he should work out more!

“Sure!” He squeaked.

The man smiled in thanks before grabbing the kitten from his arms and pressing loud sappy kissies to his fuzzy little forehead. His croaky foreboding voice snapped to a squealing happy coo. 

Roman laughed at how ridiculous he was and went down to the next house. He’s never seen Logan so useless! He was never going to let me live this down- after all that teasing he’s been putting up with for flirting with Janus. Now he had some fuel to fight back. 

He knocked on the door with a new found confidence as the rain finally started to slip through the leaves and actually start to slowly soak him. Humming to himself, he looked back at Logan still failing to flirt with the random scary guy. He’d never be that useless. The door opened, “Hello there. Are you the witch that lives in these wooooo-”

A young man opened the door with a cheery smile, ginger curls flying about his head with wire frame glasses. Freckles absolutely everywhere. He was a little taller than even him! He was of course wearing a pink frilly apron with a blue soft chunky knit jumper. Everything about him looked soft. “Oh hello there. What’s your name!” 

“Uhhhhhhh... Ro?” Roman awkwardly drawled out while trying to pick his jaw off the floor. He looked back at Logan who was now walking over with the other man. 

“Hey Pat. We need a talk.” He growled out while Patton awkwardly laughed. Instinctually, Roman stepped forward to protect this marshmallow from this emo. 

“Y-yeah Virge?”

“Did you really organise for the king to sneak you a kitten?”

“Maaaybe!” Patton squeaked before launching forward and spinning him in tight excited circles. Logan was now carrying the kitten, he looked very confused and flustered as he kept his gaze firmly on the kitten. 

“Don’t distract me! You’re allergic!”

“Well are you going to make these nice young men walk all the way back with the heavy basket and wiggly little itty bitty kitty!” 

The man, Virgil, frowned with a look. “Okay. I will take the kitten and you can have visiting rights. But! Those visiting rights can be revoked at any time!” 

“Yippee!” Patton laughed with all of himself. His arms flailing into a hug for himself, his belly bursting and moving with the genuine happy laughter. Roman was thoroughly star struck. 

“Can’t believe you’re the witch of us...” Virgil groaned with his own fond smile, to which Logan was also star struck. 

They both paused as a fat raindrop slapped against Patton’s forehead. The rain must have been truly heavy if it was still dripping through the thick canopy. They turned and faced the two men and only now noticed that they were fairly wet with their hair plastered against their foreheads. They did look pretty pathetic.

Patton smiled, “Hey, Ro was it? Would you like to come in? Just to wait for the rain. Sorry, uhh,”

“Logan,” Logan introduced.

“Logan, the house is fairly small but I’m sure Virgil would love to show you around his little place!” Patton smirked innocently. 

All three of them gulped with bright blushes... but of course they all nodded along to that plan.

[snowdice]

Little Kestrel (Part 14)[Birds of Different Feathers Series]

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Logan & Patton & Virgil (future Virgil/Patton but not in this story)

Characters:

Main: Logan, Patton, Virgil

Appear: Thomas

Mentioned: Janus

Summary:

It was supposed to be a quick job either way. Either Virgil would assassinate King Thomas of Prijaznia or he’d be caught and get executed. Yet, when Virgil gets the wrong bedroom and gets caught by Prince Logan and his future royal advisor, Patton, the job ends up getting way more complicated for the 14-year-old. He also ends up sleeping in a (actually pretty comfortable) closet for a few weeks…

Notes: Implied/referenced child abuse, assassination attempt, knives, torture mentioned, captivity, teenagers being really dumb

This is a prequel to Kill Dear. I wrote it 100 words at a time on my blog, but this is the edited version. If you want to see how it was crafted, look at the tag proofread stories.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13

“So then,” Patton was saying. “We ran to the stables.”

“We went to gazebo first,” Logan cut in.

“Right, we tried to go to the gazebo first,” Patton corrected, “but Mr. Deknis was over there tending to the tomatoes, and we knew he’d tell Mama the second he saw us. So, then we turned around and went to the stables.”

Virgil tilted his head, listening to the story Patton was telling. Patton was not the best storyteller. He tended to get lost in the middle and embellish, though Logan always corrected him. It was still very entertaining to watch though because he got incredibly animated. He’d even toppled himself over in excitement a couple of times.

Virgil squeezed the small pillow he had in his lap. He… wasn’t 100% sure what was going on. Logan and Patton had settled him on the blanket covered ground near Logan’s bed and proceeded to feed him snacks and talk about a lot of different things. It had started with them talking about what they’d done that day, and when Patton had made reference to something Virgil hadn’t understood, the two of them ended up talking about things from their childhood.

Virgil found himself entranced by their stories about playing in and running around the castle. It was all so different from what Virgil had experienced.

“…but, right as we were about to get to the ladder to climb up into the hay loft, Logan tripped!” Patton said, arms whipping around him. “He fell into a container of grain for the horses and it spilled all over the place. He tried to get up but grabbed the edge of the water trough and apparently it wasn’t very secure because it fell over and soaked him. So, then he was wet and covered in grain. He looked hilarious.”

“I did not!” Logan protested, but it did not sound like all of the other times he’d corrected Patton’s stories that night.

Patton looked over at him. “You did! You woke up the cute stable hand and he laughed himself silly at you, and by the time we got you even partially cleaned up, your dad had already found us. That’s how we got caught.”

“I have no recollection of these events,” Logan clearly lied, his cheeks a bit flushed.

“Liar,” Patton claimed. “You complained about picking grain out of your sheets for weeks.”

“No,” Logan growled.

“Yes! It’s okay. It was a good laugh.”

Logan’s eyes narrowed on him, and he looked pissed, but a second later, his expression lightened up. “You know what else was a ‘good laugh’?” he asked.

There was a second of silence before…

“Don’t you dare Logan.”

Logan looked Patton directly in the eye. “Patton was thirteen,” Logan started, but was interrupted the next moment when Patton lobbed a pillow at his head. Logan grabbed the pillow and leaned forward to smack Patton back with it. “He was thirteen and had just ‘discovered boys’ as his mother and my father called it when they attempted to explain his behavior to me. The focus of said ‘discovering’ at the time was the son of an ambassador from Lamir” who was staying for the summer, a seventeen-year-old boy by the name Bernardo.”

Virgil flinched back as Patton suddenly threw himself across the semicircle they’d made with their bodies to tackle Logan to the ground. He watched as they ineffectually wrestled on the ground for a few seconds before Logan, voice strained, continued to speak, while battling Patton’s hands away from his mouth.

“Patton’s only knowledge about flirting… ow… at that point was laughing at everything someone said and touching their arms and shoulders.” Logan managed to flip himself onto his stomach which was a horrible move as far as Virgil was concerned. It put him at a disadvantage to get out of the pin. However, Patton just kept reaching for his mouth and didn’t bare down on his neck to try to cut off his oxygen like Virgil expected. So, perhaps it was a rational move. “Our parents were speaking leaving Patton, Bernardo, and I in the garden,” Logan mumbled into the ground. “Bernardo said something ‘funny’ and Patton went to slap his shoulder while laughing but shoved too hard… Patton did you just lick my face?!”

“And I’ll do it again if you don’t shut up!” Patton threatened. That was a… weird fighting strategy.

Logan paused to consider his options. “He shoved Bernardo into the fountain and when Bernardo asked him why he did that, he ran away and wouldn’t talk to him the rest of the summer!” Logan rushed out.

Patton reached over and grabbed the nearest pillow, proceeding to whack him viciously in the back of the head. Logan was lucky the nearest object was a pillow and not something any sturdier. “It’s not funny!” Patton yelled, smacking him even more, which was when Virgil realized Logan was laughing despite the pinning and pillow pummeling. “It’s not!” Patton said. “I really liked him!!”

“He was seventeen!” Logan said. “It was never going to happen!”

Patton groaned and rolled off of Logan to lay on his back and stare at the ceiling. “But he had so many muscles,” Patton said. “He probably could have thrown me 10 yards.”

“And that is… a benefit?” Logan asked, rolling over onto his side to face him.

“You don’t. Get me.” Patton tilted his head to look at Virgil. “Anyway,” he said. “That is the story of how I died at 13.”

Virgil stared at him, and Patton’s forehead crinkled looking at him.

“Is something wrong, honey?” he asked.

 “What was that?” Virgil asked.

“What was what?”

Virgil just blinked at him. Patton seemed to think for a moment.

“Oh, did you think we were fighting?” Patton asked. “Like, really fighting?”

“You weren’t fighting?” Virgil asked.

“No, sweetie,” Patton said. “We were just playing.” He popped up into a sitting position. “Well, play fighting, but emphasis on play!”

Virgil looked over at Logan for confirmation. “No one is harmed nor was there any intention to harm each other,” he assured.

Patton grabbed the pillow he’d been smacking Logan with. “Like this!” he said. “Bap.” Unlike how he’d smacked Logan ruthlessly, he basically just touched Virgil’s shoulder with it.

Virgil squinted at him.

“Bap!” Patton said again, smacking him once more, this time with a little bit more force and on the cheek. Virgil’s nose scrunched up. “Pillow fight!”

“Pillow fight?”

“You try,” he said, pointing to the pillow in Virgil’s lap.

Virgil glanced down at the bands around his wrist. “Um…” he said. “I don’t think I can?”

“Oh, right,” Patton said with a frown. He bit his lip and glanced over at Logan. “Maybe…”

“Ill-advised,” Logan said.

“But…” Patton said. “Pillow fight.”

“We would have to be very cautious and make sure there were no weapons in the area.”

“No weapons but pillows!”

“Fine,” Logan relented to whatever was going on. “Let’s clear the area.” Virgil watched them with mounting confusion as they removed everything within a few meters radius of him except for pillows and blankets.

“There!” Patton said after a minute. “All done!”

“What are you doing?” Virgil said.

“We’re going to have a pillow fight,” Patton said.

“But I…”

“We’ll temporarily allow your restraints to be in the third setting like when you’re in the closet.”

Were they serious? Were they stupid? Virgil could have killed them dozens of times with the second setting and now they were giving him even more range of motion?

“You have to promise not to try to hurt anyone though,” Patton said. Virgil stared at him dumbly, as Patton held out his pinky finger. “Pinky promise.”

“Pinky promise?”

Patton nodded solemnly. “We lock pinky fingers and make a promise. It’s the most binding promise in the universe.”

Virgil looked at his finger, confused. He’d never heard of that type of deal. “What kind of magic is it?”

“No magic,” Patton said. “Just friendship.” Virgil tilted his head but brought his hand up so Patton could twine their fingers together. “Now, promise you won’t hurt anyone.”

“I promise I won’t hurt anyone,” he said.

“It’s a deal!” said Patton, squeezing Virgil’s finger with his own briefly before drawing away. “I trust you.” Virgil felt a rush of something that was no type of magic he’d ever come into contact before but was definitely far more powerful.

Logan came over to them and waved his hand over the restraints on Virgil. They buzzed slightly and Virgil looked between them. “So, I just hit you with pillows?”

“Try not to hit too hard near the face, and Lo and I should probably take off our glasses before we start, but yeah,” Patton said, taking his glasses off as he said it. It was yet another foolish move on his part. “It’s fun, and it doesn’t hurt.”

“Okay…” Virgil said.

“I will demonstrate,” Logan said as he took a pillow and smacked Patton in the stomach.

“Hey! No fair!” Patton giggled. “We haven’t started yet!” This did not deter Logan however, as he continued to smack Patton with a pillow.

“On the contrary,” he said. “It has started, and we’re getting you first.”

“No,” Patton whined, but the way he crumpled to the ground under the onslaught seemed far too staged to make Virgil worry. He didn’t even try to curl up into a ball or protect his head, just taking the hits and giggling.

Logan looked up at Virgil and motioned with his head. Virgil inched over and looked down at Patton. Logan slowed for a few moments. “Go on,” he urged.

Virgil bit his lip and reached forward to smack Patton lightly with his pillow which seemed to do nothing to him but renew his peels of giggles. From there, it was easy to continue. Logan picked up the pace of his strikes and he and Virgil proceeded to ‘fight’ Patton until he couldn’t breathe through his laughter and pushed the pillows away, curling up on his side to recover. Virgil took the cue from Logan to cease their attack.

“Now what?” Virgil asked when Patton sat up.

“Now I get vengeance!” Patton said, popping to his feet and smacking Logan in the face. “Help me Virgil!” So, Virgil turned on Logan and he and Patton gave the prince the same treatment. Then, because it was only fair, it was Virgil’s turn, though they were a lot more careful with him then they’d been with each other, and really Patton spent more of the time checking in on Virgil then actually hitting him with the pillow. It was nice. Fun. And when Virgil pushed them away, they pulled back.

Then, it was Patton’s turn again and they went around teaming up on each other and sometimes just smacking at each other at random.

Eventually, they slowed, and all ended up laying near each other on the floor.

“Well, that made me hungry,” Patton said, sitting up and stretching. “I asked Mama to make us a bunch of mini sandwiches. I’ll go get them.”

He hopped to his feet to walk over to where they’d stored the food earlier in those little glowing magical balls Logan had for food preservation.

Logan and Virgil sat up too, and Virgil offered him his wrists.

“Right,” Logan said with a blink. He made a motion and Virgil could feel the magic weighing down his hands once again. He’d almost forgotten, Virgil thought with an internal sigh. They’d given an assassin free range of motion, had a pillow fight with him, and almost forgotten to restrain him again. What was Virgil going to do with these idiots?

Want to read more? Click below!

AO3 Part 15

[fairymadnessyeah]

Remus’ Dream

Sequel to Roman’s Nightmare

Find it in AO3 too

"Really, Logan? You are a saviour, A hero. Call me if you need anything," Roman says, and is out of the door a second later.

It doesn't really surprise Remus. His twin brother would rather do anything than spend time with him. Which he could understand, he would rather die than spend more time with his twin. They already spent all their childhood together, and that had been more than enough.

Remus didn't need his plastic basic bitch of a brother to have a good time. However, he didn't want to spend it with nerdy wolverine over here. The guy, Logan was it, looked like a strict square and teacher. And no matter how hot he found that, it usually meant he was no fun at all.

"Here, one of our other roommates made these as welcome present," he says and shoves a plate of cookies on his hands.

He follows the nerd to the living room, and the two sit down on the couch in front of the Tv. He munches on the cookies like he always does, gulping them down by the handful while the other stares. Logan waits until he is done with the snack to talk again. "I believe that to be a good host; I should entertain you. What do you find entertaining?" he asks.

"I like to open up bodies with a sharp object and take out the insides," he smiles.

"I see," he hums. "Do you do a downward, horizontal cut from the pectoral area, or is it more efficient to do so below the external oblique at the side of the body?"

"I know, it's disgust- WAIT, did you ask something about it!?" he exclaims surprised. Nobody wanted to hear anything about what he said. Just because he didn't hide about the real world like his brother, Roman. He always preached about unicorns and dragons and happily ever afters. But not him. Remus knew the reality. People were made of meat tissues and squishy organs filled with blood, and they would die eventually.

But people were stupid, and they all prefered the curtain that his brother presented. Well, almost all of them.

"Yes, I wish to know more about you and your interest. I promised Roman I would keep you company. So, do you use a scalpel or some other type of sharp object to open up corpses? Of which I believe you are doing legally," Logan says.

"I-I do... I'm a forensic scientist," he answers, still shocked by Logan's reaction. "And the cutting depends on how the person died. The last time I had to open somebody top to bottom, it turned out the man had been suffocated to death by being made to swallow arcade machine coins," he explains.

"Fascinating! How do you know he was forced to ingest them, and he didn't do it by his own volition?" he asks, interested.

"There were signs of force on his skin," Remus tells him, dazed and with stars in his eyes. He is starting to love the fact that his brother left him with Logan.

The two keep on talking. They went from Remus' job, and somehow ended in a discussion over what chemical would be better for blood removal. As the time went on, Remus started shifting closer and closer to the tie-wearing man. He would get lost in the movement of his lips, and those framed blue eyes. And when he moved close enough that he could touch the other man, his hands gained a mind of their own, and wandered around the nerd, like spiders wander around the rotting corpse of a fly trapped in their web.

He had been flirting and filling the conversation with sexual innuendoes. But it seemed as they had no effect on Logan. The man was either completely clueless over Remuses advances, or uninterested and trying to be polite. Remus was now draped over the other. He had his legs over Logan's lap, his head leaned over his shoulder, and his hand playing with his tie. His voice was low and sensual, and being so close to his neck was so tempting. He just wanted to lean in closer and take a bite.

"Excuse my forwardness, but are you romantically interested in me?" Logan asks, looking down at him with an eyebrow raised.

"Maybe~," he coos, and giggles in a flirty way. "What are you going to do about it?~," he challenges, and sees something flash in his eyes.

"I'll say that I feel flattered, and that your advances are well received. I too find myself very attracted to you," Logan tells him, fixing his tie. "However, I believe we must put a temporarily stop at the moment, before things progress further," Remus opens his mouth to complain, but he is interrupted by Logan before he can get a word out. "Your brother is my roommate, and while he can be infuriating, I don't think it would do any good if he was to find us in this situation. Our house-hold harmony could be broken, and that could lead to problems. I believe our best course of action will be to wait for him and tell him that our relationship will proceed romantically one, rather than platonically," he explains.

"You don't need Roman's permission to date me!" Remus complains. "I am the only one who has the final say on who I fuck! And I think it's time we move further into the bedroom, and you further inside me~," he proposes, and changes his position to be sitting on Logan's lap. He grinds down to drive his point across.

Logan clears his throat before speaking again. "As delectable as that sounds, I must decline your proposition. The house-hold harmony must be maintained," he is about to take Remus off his lap, when the man with facial hair stops him.

"But, what if this is his plan?" he points out, making Logan stop in his tracks.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, my brother is hopeless stupid romantic, and a wardrobe malfunction is not going to take him all day. He ditched us here for a reason," Logan hums, taking in what he is saying. "Maybe, he wanted to play match-maker. I'm new in town, and you are single, right?" Logan nods. "It's the perfect plan, don't you think?" he doesn't, for a second, think that Roman would do anything like that for him. But if he can convince Logan, that he might, then they might get down to  business .

"That quite the unusual plan Roman would come up with, but I can see how you might have arrived to such conclusion," he says, rubbing his chin thinking. "How do you suppose we should test this hypothesis you have created?" Remus grins get bigger.

"Well...~" he leans in closer, wrapping his arms around Logan's shoulders. "I might have an idea~," he whispers right above the other's lips, before closing the distance.

Logan both relaxes and tenses when their lips connect. His shoulders goes lax, but he holds onto Remus tighter. They don't synchronize well at first. But once they get a rhythm going, they just fit together. It's like finding the missing puzzle piece you been searching for years. Remus, who has been with his fair share of different partners, had never felt so much from just a kiss. He feels like pins and needles are stabbing him softly on his stomach. Logan's lips are hard but smooth, and he can feel how breathless he is due to the soft kiss.

When they separate to breathe, he can see pink dusting his nerd's cheeks and the dazed stare with which he looks at him. It is in that moment that Remus decides he is going to marry this man. No matter what his brother says, he is going to marry this nerd. Unluckily, his unrested body decided to cockblock him, and he let out a tired yawn.

"Are you tired?" Logan asks.

"Just a little, I been travelling since yesterday," Remus explains. "But it's nothing. We should keep going," he leans back in, but Logan stops him.

"We can continue this when you are better rested," he tells him with a soft smile, that makes Remus feel gushy inside. "Come, I will lend you my room for you to sleep," Logan takes him to the left side of the apartment, and to a blue door that had the name 'LOGAN' written neatly on the front.

"Have a good rest, Remus. I will wake you for dinner if needed," he tells him as he opens the door for him.

"Thanks, but before you go..." he wraps his arms around him, and gives him another kiss. The two get lost in each other's lips, and before he can stop him, he takes a bite out of Logan's neck, and then sucks on the skin. His nerdy wolverine is the most exquisite blood-red colour. He grins at his reaction before going inside the room.

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When he wakes up, is to the sweet sounds of his twin brother in pain. He steps away from Logan's room, that smells like ink and crofters, and goes to the living room. All the roommates are there. The guy with the bakery is cooking, and the painter is looking down at his brother on the floor. Logan is putting his book back in the library and the hickey he gave him still red and proudly presented on his neck.

"So, now that he knows, can we have that D appointment?" he asks as he wraps his arms around Logan's waist. His brother lets out a pathetic wheeze, and the emo pats his head in comforts.

He's got to admit, moving here was one of the best ideas he ever had.

[notveryglittery]

misc royality #2

summary: it’s basically the sleepover drive thru video lol wc: 900 / ship: royality! duh!! author’s note: i reblogged this post in october of 2018 and wrote like 200 words back then and never got back to it but i’m on a writing kick so here’s this? hope you enjoy!! 

— — —

This was ridiculous in about every sense of the word but Roman really couldn’t bring himself to care all that much. Logan called him ridiculous all the time so he might as well live up to it, right? Mostly, Roman just hoped he didn’t look stupid and raise any eyebrows for going into the same fast food drive through twice in one day. It had, at the very least, been quite a few hours now since he was here last. He just couldn’t get the employee out of his head. Roman tapped his fingers along to the beat of the song playing from the speakers, admiring how the glitter in his red polish caught the sunlight. He laughed under his breath and rolled his eyes. One compliment and he was smitten… Truly ridiculous.

The car in front of him pulled forward and Roman did the same, glad that no one had arrived behind him just yet. He turned the music off and leaned slightly out of the window, to make sure the conversation could go as smoothly as possible.

“Hi, welcome to Taco Bell! What would you like today?”

Roman was quite sure he recognized the voice.

“Uh, were you working earlier by chance?”

“Yes…” A pause. “I was?” It sounded hesitant and Roman hurried to continue, not wanting to come across as a complete weirdo.

“You were— Okay, I came by and I ordered a beefy five layer burrito with no sour cream and I think you complimented my nail polish and I just wanted to know if you wanted to have a sleepover tonight?” Had he said it too fast? Would the employee even remember him?

“A… a what?”

“A sleepover!” Roman repeated, enthusiasm coloring his tone and overriding his nerves.

“A sleepover?” They sounded confused but excited.

Roman tried to reign his hopes in before they could get too high. “Yeah!”

“Really?!”

“Yeah!” Roman said again.

“When?”

“Tonight,” Roman suggested, finally giving in and letting his hands happy flap against the steering wheel. This was going so much better than he thought it would!

“Can you come up to the window?” The employee asked with laughter in their voice.

“Yeah!” Roman said once more, higher pitched suddenly in his joy.

With still no car behind him in the drive-thru, Roman pulled up to the second window with confidence thrumming through his veins. He felt sort of bad for not actually ordering any food this time but he could always get a Baja Blast or something if necessary. He shifted gears into park, just in case the conversation took longer than his foot cared to be pressed on the gas pedal. He leant out his window again, chin propped up on his hand, and put on an effortlessly charming smile while he waited.

Soon enough, the drive thru window slid open, and there the employee was. Roman could see now the name tag read Patton and specified he/they underneath in smaller print. Roman hoped it was okay to assume the blue bracelet Patton was wearing, though, was a clue that today was a he/him day.

“Hi,” Patton said, giggling a little.

“Hi,” Roman echoed, wishing science had made it possible to bottle sounds so that he could hear that laugh for the rest of his life. “I’m Roman. Sorry if this is weird?”

Patton shook his head. “I’ve had weirder, trust me.”

Roman could only guess what that meant and for a moment, righteous anger on Patton’s behalf flooded through him. However, Patton smiled and anything bad in the world melted away.

“Were you serious about the sleepover?” He asked, seeming shy about it.

“Absolutely!” Roman exclaimed. He flashed his hand, letting his nails catch the light. “You’re never too old for makeovers and romcoms and gossip!”

“Wine and baked goods too, right?” Patton offered, from shy to sly in a moment.

Roman swooned.

“I clock out in two hours. Would it be okay to meet at the Starbucks across the street?”

Roman nodded fervently. “Of course! We can stay there awhile too, if you want. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“I’m not sure that you could,” Patton reassured sweetly.

Roman had flirted and been flirted with a lot in his time but this? This was going to kill him.

“Will you get in trouble if I don’t buy something?”

Patton waved a dismissive hand. “Don’t worry about it! At least you aren’t asking for a refund.”

“Okay…” Roman hesitated, loath to end the interaction. “I’ll… see you in two hours, then?”

“I’m looking forward to it!” Patton promised before glancing behind Roman’s car. A customer had arrived during their chat. “Oh. Back to it then. Have a nice day, Roman!”

Patton waved him goodbye and Roman really had do his best to focus on actually driving safely back out onto the road. The Starbucks date will go swimmingly, bonding over sugary drinks and cake pops; they’ll swing by the grocery store next to buy wine and pastries, Roman laughing over every one of Patton’s food-related puns; the sleepover itself is more fun than either has had in a good while. It’s a lovely start to their friendship and a solid road to possibly more. Until then, Roman will sing along loudly and happily to his music on his way home, looking forward to the future.

[emy-loves-you]

Wrong Numbers and Useless Gays Chapter 21

Picnics and Confessions

Chapter 20 | Masterlist

There’s a brief mention of sex, but other than that there shouldn’t be anything else. I hope you enjoy this final chapter of the original series, and I’ll be back soon with the sequel!

“She smiled and she said

on days like this

it seems like it never rains” Remus sang, getting out of the car. He skipped around to the passenger seat, opening the door and holding his arm out.

“But without the rain, we’d starve.” Janus duetted, grabbing Remus’ arm as he got out. They walked up the driveway, softly singing one of Remus’ favorite songs. Before Janus could even knock, the front door swung open to reveal Virgil. He was a wreck; there were dark circles under his eyes, and his hair looked like a rat’s nest. His eyes were wide and panicked as he led them inside.

“You’re late!” Virgil hissed out, slamming the door shut behind them. The house was a mess. The kitchen sink was overflowing with dirty pots and pans that they knew weren’t there yesterday. The coffee maker was on (a rare sight these days) and there were several towels lying about, presumably cleaning coffee spills if the dark brown liquid was any indication. There was a large picnic basket in the living room, along with a large pile of makeup products.

“Your date doesn’t start until 3, right?” Remus asked, raising an eyebrow at the messes. It was very un-Virgil-like to be messy. While Remus was used to cleaning up from a young age (*cough* shitty parenting *cough*), it was Virgil who actually wanted a clean house (sure, Janus did too, but he had no cooking or cleaning experience before he met Virgil). Virgil must be really stressed out if he didn’t subconsciously clean up after himself.

“Yeah, but I’ve got an errand to run beforehand.” Virgil replied, leading them to his room. There were clothes strewn about everywhere, but his bed was neatly made. His clock read 10:22 AM. Janus scowled at the clock. How long had Virgil been up?

“You seem to be taking this quite seriously.” Janus commented, moving some of the clothes so he could sit on the edge of the bed. “Almost as if this was-”

Remus gasped, bouncing on the tips of his toes. “A DATE! Is this a date?”

Virgil sighed, grabbing a fistful of his own hair. “I don’t know! Maybe?” He started pacing around the room. “What if they don’t see this as a date and I show up in something too formal? What if they DO see this as a date and I show up in something too casual? God, what if this is a date and I blow it? What if they see me and get angry that I lied to them and they hate me and-”

“Virgil, breathe.” Janus said, gesturing over to Remus. Remus walked over to Virgil and grabbed him by the shoulders, which forced him to stop pacing. Virgil stood there for a second, his eyes wide and unfocused. “Breathe in for four, hold for seven, out for eight. You’re doing so well, Virgil.” Janus instructed, praising Virgil when he started following the breathing exercise. It took several minutes for Virgil to calm down.

“Thanks, guys.” Virgil finally said, flopping down on the bed next to Janus. “I’m gonna screw this up.”

“No, you won’t.” Janus said, carding his fingers through Virgil’s hair. He immediately leaned into the touch. Remus bounced his way over to the closet.

“And even if you do, they won’t judge you for it.” Remus said cheerfully, sorting through Virgil’s clothes. “Roro’s dating Craft and Morales, right?”

“Logan Croft and Patton Morale.” Virgil corrected him, still relaxed in Janus’ hold.

“Whatever,” Remus replied, still sifting through Virgil’s clothes. “I may have left before the three of them got together, but I remember them being friends. Other than Ro and Lo’s ‘spats’ I’ve never seen the three of them be mean on purpose.”

“What about your fight with Ro outside the bathroom? And his argument with me when I met him?” Virgil asked, closing his eyes.

“I started that argument with Ro. And he thought that you groped him, so he’s not really at fault.” Remus sighed. “Look, I’m not gonna promise you that nothin’ll go wrong. But, I know those three, from both my high school years and your interactions with them. Worst case scenario, they ask you to stop flirting with ‘em and you remain friends. Best case scenario,” Remus turned around, holding the perfect outfit for Virgil. “You get yourself three hunkin’ pieces of man meat.”

Virgil blushed, getting up and grabbing the outfit. It was a black v-neck t-shirt and black skinny jeans, both skin-tight. Virgil grabbed those along with his jacket that Patton made him for Christmas, and went to the bathroom to change.

Remus turned to look at Janus. “Bet you he ends up sleeping with them tonight.”

Janus tilted his head. “How much?”

Remus grinned, holding out his hand. “If you win, I’ll never complain about that stupid rug again. If I win, the rug goes.”

Janus thought for a moment before smiling, taking Remus’ hand. “Deal.” He pulled Remus in so that he was straddling Janus, their lips meeting in a heated kiss.

“Ew, gross. You’re in my room guys.” The two gays turned to see Virgil standing in the doorway. Remus whistled. Virgil sighed, gesturing to the living room. “C’mon, I need help with my hair and makeup.”

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Virgil stepped into the confectionery, smiling at the pleasant chime that the door made. It was weird; even though Virgil had bought almost every item here at least once, he’s never actually entered the store until now. He heard someone up at the counter and walked over. He was pleasantly surprised to recognize the person’s voice.

“Hello, welcome to the Chocolate Plaza, how may I- HOLY SHMOKES YOU’RE ANXIETY!” Joan yelled, obviously recognizing Virgil’s persona. Virgil smirked. Maybe telling Joan can help Virgil prepare himself for telling his crushes.

“Hey Joan, I’ve got three boxes under the name ‘Storm.’” Virgil said, leaning onto the counter. His smirk widened when Joan recognized his voice.

“Virgil? You’re Anxiety?” At Virgil’s nod, their face lit up. “I was wondering why you never wanted to pick up your chocolate! So, what’s the occasion, Mr. Rockstar?”

Virgil laughed, pulling out his wallet. “I’m finally telling my crushes that I’m Anxiety. Y’know, the people I’ve been shipping these chocolates to.”

Joan went to grab the boxes of chocolate, yelling out behind them. “So you’ve spent hundreds of dollars worth of chocolate on them and they’ve never seen your face before?”

“Not as Virgil.” He yelled back, a blush of embarrassment forming on his face.

Joan laughed. “You’ve fallen for them hard, haven’t you?” They laughed when Virgil blushed harder. “Well, I hope you don’t need these apology chocolates, but here they are anyways.” Virgil’s blush didn’t fade as he paid for the chocolates and left.

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Virgil sighed as he made his way to Waverly Park. It was 2:30 now, and the park was about 15 minutes away. He’d still be early, but not as early as he wanted to be. Just as he adjusted the basket in his hands he felt something his nose. He stopped to wipe his nose when something else hit his cheek. It took Virgil a moment to figure out what it was: water.

It was raining.

Virgil groaned, but he kept walking. Hopefully, it would only sprinkle and go away soon. The weather forecast didn’t say anything about rain. Why did it have to rain now?

Unfortunately, the rain did not cease. Within minutes, the rain started to pour, and soon Virgil was soaked to the bone. He shivered as he weighed his options. It would be at least 10 minutes before Remus or Janus could pick him up, and even if he got to the park, there would be nowhere to shelter them from the rain. Virgil felt tears start to form in his eyes. He’d planned everything down to the letter, but like always it somehow managed to go horribly wrong. He looked up at the street name, ready to text it to Janus, when he recognized it. He turned around, squinting through the rain before he saw what he was looking for.

Patton, Logan, and Roman’s house. Without really thinking of the consequences, Virgil ran.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Patton sighed, hanging up his coat. He and his boyfriends had just gotten ready for their date (was it a date? He hoped it was) with Virgil when it started to rain. He grabbed his phone, ready to cancel his plans. Maybe they could go out tomorrow? Patton wasn’t sure if he could wait that long.

Knock Knock Knock

“Coming!” Patton called out, hurrying to the door. Who in their right mind would be walking around in this storm? When he opened the door he was surprised by what he saw.

“Hey, Pat.” Virgil whimpered out, tremors shaking his entire frame. His oversized jacket (the one Patton made for him!) hung off of him, dripping slightly. His hair was pressed against his forehead, and his makeup had smeared down his face. He looked like he was about to fall over- and he was still carrying that basket, the poor thing!

“Aw, sweety,” Patton murmured, taking his basket and jacket. He led Virgil to the sofa, wrapping him up in the nearest blanket (Logan’s space-themed comforter that he’d left there last night). “I’m gonna head upstairs real quickly, okay kiddo?” At Virgil’s nod, he made his way upstairs. He passed by Roman and Logan, who were changing into more comfortable clothes. “Lo, please go turn up the thermostat. And Ro, can you go grab some of your comfy clothes? Virgil’s closest to your size.” When they just paused and looked at him, he explained himself. “Virgil’s downstairs. He was probably on his way to the park. The poor fella, he’s soaked to the bone. He might have hypothermia.”

“Well, that won’t do at all!” Roman said, turning to grab some clothes. “We mustn’t let our future love freeze to death!”

“Future love IF he says yes,” Logan remarked, heading downstairs to change the thermometer. Patton smiled, heading to their room to grab spare blankets.

Logan saw Virgil downstairs and smiled. “It’s nice to see you again, though I wish it could be under…better circumstances.” Virgil nodded, and Logan noticed that he was still crying. As soon as he turned the temperature up, Logan moved to sit next to Virgil. He wrapped his arm around Virgil, happy to see that he wasn’t shivering as much.

Roman and Patton headed down soon after, carrying spare clothes and blankets. “We have arrived!” Roman called out, making Patton giggle. “And we’ve brought gifts!” Virgil started crying harder. Roman noticed and moved to kneel in front of him. Patton sat on Virgil’s other side. “What’s wrong?” Roman asked, catching himself before he called Virgil ‘storm cloud.’

Virgil struggled to talk through his tears. “T-today w-was supposed t-to be p-perfect.” He stammered out. “I w-wanted to have a p-picnic, and I’d t-tell you that I was A-Anxiety, and I’d g-give you chocolates- and-” He gasped, nearly choking on his own tears.

Roman grabbed Virgil’s hands, gently messaging them. “Breathe, Storm Cloud, it’s okay. Today is perfect. You’re here, we’ve still got the picnic and chocolates, and just seeing you makes me so happy-” Before Roman could continue, someone kissed him quiet. Roman was used to this; it was something they all tended to do when one of them rambled for too long. Something was different, however. It took a moment for Roman to figure out what it was.

Virgil was kissing him.

Before Roman could process that, Virgil suddenly pulled away. “I’m sorry.” Virgil said quickly, looking down. He moved to pull away some more. Well, that wouldn’t do at all.

Roman surged upwards, lips meeting Virgil’s. He tried to convey all of his emotions into this kiss. All of his love, insecurity, adoration, and desperation. It felt like an inferno was igniting within him. He sighed as they separated a second time, this time for air. Roman looked Virgil in the eye. “Don’t you dare feel sorry.” Roman panted out. “You mean the world to me.”

Virgil sat there, completely still. Whether it was because of the kiss or because of what Roman said, Virgil couldn’t tell. “But I lied to you for almost a year! I didn’t tell you that I was Anxiety! I don’t deserve you guys!” He felt a hand grab his jaw and he let it turn his head. He was now looking Patton dead in the eye.

Patton glared at him. “Virgil Storm, don’t you dare start talking bad about yourself!” He said sternly. His gaze softened slightly. “Besides,” He pressed a kiss to Virgil’s nose, forehead, cheeks, and finally his lips. “We already realized that you were Anxiety, Virgil.”

Virgil’s eyes widened with every kiss, and he started gaping once Patton finished talking. “Really?” He felt another hand on his cheek, and he let it guide him. He was now facing Logan, who had a very tender expression on his face.

“While Patton has known since Valentine’s Day, Roman and I discovered it the day of the concert. However, this does not change our opinion of you.” He reached to cup Virgil’s cheekbone. “Virgil, you are funny, clever, talented, and an all-around amazing individual. We are all in love with you, and would like to in a relationship with you. Will you do us the honor of joining our relationship?” Logan asked, stars in his eyes.

Virgil nodded, pressing his lips to Logans. “Yes, yes, yes” He said between kisses. He smiled, tears forming in his eyes as he kissed Logan. He could barely get his head around that. He just kissed Roman and Patton, and now he’s kissing Logan! It was a dream come true and he couldn’t stop crying.

Logan suddenly pulled back, wiping away Virgil’s tears. “Let’s get you out of those wet clothes. Then we can eat and watch a movie. Does that sound satisfactory?”

Virgil nodded, his smile never fading. “I love you guys, so much.”

Logan smiled back. “And we love you.”

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Taglist: @bisexualdisaster106 @self-taught-mess @itawalrus @arodynamic-enby @sanderssides-angst

[sanders-sides-fic]

Up there, too far away to hold me

I got inspired to write this by this post by @creepichan. I know it isn’t the intended purpose of that room, but, well… I hope this is still alright.

Careful, though. This is angsty. Like, really, really, really, really angsty. Now that we’ve established that, on we go:

His steps were purposeful, he wished to believe. But they were definitely hesitant, as much as he’d like to deny that one. But the matter of the fact was that he felt awkward to be here. He didn’t really feel as though this was a place he was welcome at, and he knew the reason for that far too well. So one might say his steps were cautious, but he would much rather call them meticulous.

It was early. Too early for anyone else being here. And, while that calmed him a little bit as he knew no one would see him here, that just worsened the feeling of intruding inside his gut.

He didn’t want to feel like that. He didn’t deserve to feel like that. They had done this to him, they were the ones to blame. He hadn’t deserved what they’d done to him! He should be angry, he had every right to come here and trash the place and vandalize and scream at them and demand to righten this injustice - but he actually only felt like crying. Maybe he would do the screaming bit.

He would admit, there had been a time when he’d felt angry. Furious, even. He’d used what little power their treacherous act had left him with to spite them in every way he could think of, made a point of letting them know just how much he despised them. But that had worn off quickly. Way too quickly. Not even an entire century later he’d been left with nothing but the grief.

His steps came to a halt at the end of the room, where the ridiculously long aisle opened up into a half circle on either side. In front of him was the altar, but he made a point of avoiding looking there. Too much was this like that room back home, where everything had crashed that day. The only reminder of where he was was that there was, in fact, an altar there. If only there would have been Roman’s throne. Heavens, how he longed to see Roman’s throne again.

So his eyes skipped the altar, focusing on the way the light filtered through the stained glass. The windows were just above his shoulders, forcing him to look up if he wished to see the faces of the people who had damned him like this, cast him out and chased him from his home. And why would he want to see them again? He hated them for what they’d done, just as much as they hated him.

Neither of the four figures had faces in their glass-walled mosaic portraits, he noticed. None of them. But Roman still had his crown. A golden, pointy thing amidst all the fiery red the god of passion, creativity, dreams, romance and arts was represented by. It was almost as much as he really did surround himself with, that thick-headed Roman, that rambling man with sparkling eyes. So obviously on the edge of braking into tiny pieces of self-doubt, so happy about every little compliment, so over the top in his vows of protection he’d never actually need to provide, or want to, apparently. The god may have been easy to flirt with and an endless source of friendly banter and long rants about future glory and happiness… But he was still so taken with his color. Like, seriously? Was that the only thing the god identified himself with, even over that typically fanciful symbol? Oh, he’d always scorned the overly dramatic display with that overly aggressive color.

On the left side, light up by the raising sun as well, the god of family, love, morals, and empathy was represented in his soft blue and beige hues. Ha! As if love or “family” had meant a lot to Patton that day. As if any empathy had been shown that moment when the god had stabbed him in the back. As if it was morally justifiable what he’d suggested that day. Gone where the war hugs and the easy, stupid jokes he’d cracked out of the blue. Forgotten all the warm evenings in the coldest winters. No more overly sweet chocolate chip cookies or hot chocolate or even just empty promises of forever. Not that he’d want any of that anymore, and it wasn’t as though he’d ever believed those promises were real anyways. Out of all of them, he may very well resented Patton the most.

He turned on his heels, almost thinking about leaving. But really he just wanted to see the other two windows. The two he could still see in the morning, but that weren’t light up form the outside yet, patterns made visible rather by the candles surrounding him in this room. Opposite of Patton was the god of logic, wisdom, knowledge, debate, intelligence, calmness. He didn’t officially represent all of that, but looking at the dark blue and black glass shreds that made him, as the picture held a book in such an unmistakable manor, that was what came to mind. Endless debates, the only clam voice in an outrage of different emotions, the smartest person he knew, the capability to logic his way out of any and all things thrown his way, facts delivered with such certainty no one would dare to question them. And those memories had no right to be so vivid in his head right now. Much rather he would focus on the icy look on the god’s face when he’d almost begged them to reconsider.

And Virgil. Right opposite to Roman was Virgil. God of fear, of fight, of protection, and storms. They’d always had a funny relationship, the two of them. Protection and self-preservation went hand-in-hand, after all. Lies and fear, however, not so much. Still, long nights and exasperation about the other’s cluelessness had bound them together. Sweet lies calming the god had brought them together. Days of fighting what couldn’t be denied anymore had brought them together. Centuries after centuries of being outcasts because of their jobs had bound them together. There hadn’t been trust that could have been broken that day. There had, though, been a fragile kind of love. The kind of love that was like a bridge made of ice, too thin to walk on confidently. The kind of love you would do anything to preserve because you knew you’d loose it for good if you didn’t. The kind of love that, in that moment it shattered, had turned into a thousand sharp edges pricing through his heart and tearing apart his soul, never melting completely in the cold their absence had left in him and therefor never letting the wounds heal. And he was proud to say that every bit of mistrusting hatred the god had shown him in just one sneer was absolutely mutual.

It was a warm day today. Disgustingly warm for his taste. He didn’t like the cold much, but such a warm day in February was just uncalled for, especially since it was only the third. And with the cold feelings bubbling inside his chest, he really, really didn’t want the day to be warm. It just felt so wrong. Why could Virgil just give him that at least?

He took a deep, shaky breath. “Hi.”, he said, ignoring the way his voice echoed through the empty chapel. He glanced over to where Roman’s and Virgil’s mosaics were, no Remus between them. So the god of chaos, destruction, creativity and… was it nightmares or death? He could never really remember which one was the job and which the hobby. Well, Remus had been canceled out of this little gathering as well, huh? He hated how relieved he felt at that. “I see you still don’t like you brother, Roman. What, still so insecure about that little black-and-white world of yours?”

He scoffed, rolling his eyes, before turning to the pictures of Virgil and Logan. That was his place. Right in between them. Right there. Or, it had been, all that time ago. He should have gotten used to it by now. He really, really should have. It still felt like a slap to the face to see the empty space, though. “Well, I suppose it does make this more symmetrical, doesn’t it?” A dark chuckle escaped him, and it might just have been a suppressed sob in reality. He wasn’t even sure anymore. “You don’t seem to regret the decision, seeing as you never even bothered to call out to me.”

Silence. There was just silence again. He had learned to hate silence in the years apart from their obnoxiously loud banter.

And, oh. Oh! Just when had he started to cry? Such an unseemly display on his part. He quickly whipped away the evidence, but it was no use. His tears came too quickly, and his sobs were too violent to hold back any longer. And, really, what was he trying to protect anymore? They’d striped him of his dignity when they’d decided to throw them out of the heavens and down to earth, and he’d let go of the rest when he begged them in vain not to. So what if he broke down after years and years and endless years of the only family he’d ever known abandoning him and pretending he didn’t exist at all? So what if he fell to the ground screaming, surrounded by colorful glass illuminated by an early sun, when he’d held himself together once he’d realized the humans among him had just eliminated him from their books, like a stain in midst all those other oh-so perfect gods?

Maybe, he thought, just maybe seeing him like this gave them satisfaction. They had, after all, not cared about what he had to say when they’d thrown him out of the gates and taken away the source of his power. So why would they now? And, well, that would mean at least someone would be happy today, right?

Or perhaps this made them feel guilty for what they’d done to him, for what they’d let become of him. If that was the case, well, good. They should be. He didn’t want to cary that burden alone anymore.

“Why?”, he asked after a while, when his tears weren’t dried but at least the pathetic sobs and wails of agony had stoped. He didn’t move from where he’d crumbled, not even an inch. His voice betrayed the fragile state he was in, though, and he hated the way it cracked and sounded so horse. “Do you even remember why you did this to me? Because I don’t. What did I… It’s been so long. Have you just suddenly become incapable of forgiveness or was what I did really so horrible? What did I do? Why did you do this to me? Why can’t I remember? Why? Just… Just tell me why. Please!”

But he was only meet with silence. And for some reason that made him angry. Almost as angry as he’d been right after it had happened. Blinded by rage for just a moment he stood up, took the nearest candle and threw it across the room. The impact put it out, but the yellow wax still spilled onto the stone floor that resembled home too much to take.

“I know you can hear me, damn it! You did this! At least have the decency to answer me!”, he yelled. But he knew that if they hadn’t responded to his broken plea, they surely wouldn’t respond to his angry outburst. Virgil was to anxious to confront someone in rage, Roman was too proud to admit he’d been listening in, Logan didn’t engage with “tantrum-throwers”, as he called it, Patton would disagree with the outburst too much and Remus, well, Remus wasn’t even worshiped in this chapel, so he doubted that the green god would hear him at all.

Still, he didn’t stop there.

“You know what? Fine! Be like that. See if I care. I hate you too, you know? I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!” With every time he said it it sounded less broken and more angry to his ears, so he repeated the sentence a few more times for good measure. Because maybe that would mean he’d believe in it at last. Because maybe the sorrow would be less present if only he was able to hate them for it. Maybe missing them wouldn’t be as bad if he could believe that he didn’t love them more than anything else after all. Maybe. But he would never actually believe those words, not really.

His eyes fixed on the spilled wax. Yellow. His color. And a sudden urge welled up inside him, a stupid urge, a Remus-ish urge to cover the entire chapel in yellow wax. He just wanted to see his color amongst theirs again. He just wanted to feel like he belonged again. He just wanted to… He wanted…

What did he even want anymore? To go back in time? To right whatever wrong had been done? To fall asleep dreaming of the old days and never wake up? Ridiculous. He’d never get any of those, it was sheer impossible. And what would he even say if they’d show up? What would he even do? Beg them to take him back? Ask for another chance they had clearly denied him multiple times before? And even if they would finally give in, what would he do then? As if they could ever move past this. As if he’d ever be able to talk to them normally if they took him back, not paranoid and scared about every move, hoping against hope to not lose them again.

No. No, it was hopeless. He didn’t want it to be, heavens, he really didn’t want it to be. But it was, wasn’t it? It was time to accept that it was over. This wasn’t just a phase. This was what they wanted. This was a forever thing.

It was that moment when two humans came in. He quickly straightened up, drying the last tears with his sleeve. Falling apart in front of the family he didn’t have anymore was one thing, but falling apart in front of humans? Never. They wouldn’t take that away from him, too.

The humans didn’t even spare him a second glance, though. Of cause not. Gods like him were hard to perceive to humans when they didn’t want you to. Of cause they didn’t notice him as he stood there, not wanting to be seen in such a state. Of cause not. Silly him.

And then something in their prayer made his heart clench painfully and his breath hitch. “The five immortal deities” Five, not six. Right. Right, there was no god of deception anymore. No god of lies, no god of self-preservation, no god of denial. He didn’t even exist anymore. That was what his family had essentially done to him, wasn’t it? Maybe not with that particular goal in mind, but surely Logan had known about the chance, Virgil thought of it as a possible outcome.

They had scratched his face and name out of their books, denying he even existed. And in doing so, they had scratched his very existence from the human’s minds and history books as well. They had taken his staff, the source of his godly powers, weakening him and leaving him with no way back on his own. They had killed him off, as good as you could kill a god, by extinguishing every memory of his existence, and they had captured him in a place where he was damned to witness his own death for all of eternity.

As tears welled up in his eyes again, he quickly turned around, hood of his black cloak pulled into his face with one of two gloved hands - because the other four had disappeared together with most of his powers as he’d been seperated from his staff - and hurried out of that damned chapel that looked too much like the damned throne room those damn gods has made that damned decision in. He suddenly only had one wish, and that was to be as far away from there as he could. He didn’t even turn around to look at the closest view he’d get to home ever again.

It was a pity he didn’t, really. If he had, perhaps he would have noticed four mirages of gods standing where he’d been yelling at them just before. Perhaps he would have even heard the hushed conversation the winds carried far away, unbeknownst to any humans:

“I hate to see him like that. I’m so sorry…”

“I know, padre. I miss him too.”

“Yes. We did, however, do everything we could. The humans do not remember him, therefor we have no means of bringing him back.”

“Emo? What…”

“I’m sorry. I guess we were just too late. See you next year, Janus.”

“I don’t believe he heard you.”

“I know.”

Taglist: @gattonero17 

I also wrote a second part to this. It’s basically everything that happened before this scene from the perspective of the others. You can find it here

[shinymooncolor]

Sweater weather chat #9

A little Friday tribute to @lumosinlove ‘s sweater weather. 

@siriuslyqueer and @wxlfstxrx thanks for helping me through a groundbreaking epiphany. <3 

Sweater weather chat #9

Celeste has plans. Logan mopes. And drives a minivan. Kuny hides in a library. Nado is a star. And the wives call him Jackie. We get some lady love. Cause hockey wives are awesome. The team dads get in trouble. What did happen in Prague? Does mild vodka exist? 

--- 

Thursday 3.42 pm 

Celeste: hi ladies! So, as you know the long dreaded school talent show is looming on the horizon. I don’t know with you -  but that’s a Saturday we will not get back…. Any ideas?? 

Anya: we send our husbands to the show. 😜 zhenya is helping my kids anyways. Not sure how that happened. But him and Jackie came to leech a free dinner and somehow ended up joining the talent show. 

Linnea: that sounds like something that needs to be recorded! I’m up for a spa weekend. God knows I need it. We’re headed for Sweden next month and I need to prepare mentally for my in-laws. 🙊

Celeste: so we agree to send the boys to the show? And get on with a lovely spa weekend ourselves 😍

Allison: I’m in. I love my boys but I’ve seen them dance and heard them sing. Brady has been successfully avoiding the past three events!!! But I’m intrigued about what the hell Kuny and Jackie can help with? 😂 

Anya: I don’t know and I don’t care. It’s sergei problem now. I’ve warned them to keep it kid friendly. Jackie is still a little scared of me, I think. 👻

Celeste: they are good boys but those two. I swear they’re worse than our lot. And that’s saying something. You remember Prague? 😠

Linnea: the one with the flags at worlds? What were they thinking.... 

Allison: oh sounds like there’s a story there! What did they get up to? 🙊

Linnea: let’s get back to that after three bottles of Chardonnay... 

——

Thursday 4.08 pm 

Celeste: you are going to the talent show. And take Logan with you. He’s been moping for a week. He’s such a teenager. 😂 and DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT DRINKING AGAIN. I will tell Logan about Prague. 😠

Dumo: but I have to train. And don’t tell anyone it’ll undermine our authority. 

Celeste: no you don’t have to, it’s optional. Don’t even start Pascal. You’re taking your ragtag team Dads and you’re all going to sit through 3 hours of recorders and botched Disney music. And you’re going to applaud your babies. And please film whatever the terrible two get up to. I’ve seen the outfits. 😂😍😂😍

Dumo: I love you but you’re mean. Enjoy your spa day. What do I get for being good?

Celeste: a wife who won’t make you sleep in the guest room. And if you’re really good we can talk about the white one again. 

Dumo: I’ll be good!!! 😇😇😇😇😇 

Celeste: 😉

——

Thursday 5.00 pm 

Dumo created a group chat. 

Dumo added Sunny, Sergei, Brady, Kuny, Nado and LoganT 

Dumo named the group chat talent show 

Dumo: gentlemen I believe you’ve all had your fates sealed. We’re now sentenced to suffer through the horror of our kids’ school talent show.

LoganT: what am I doing here? I don’t have kids leave me out 

Dumo: you left your disgusting workout clothes in MY basement. Without cleaning it up. You’re coming. Also Leo and Finn are both with their families. And Celeste made me take you cause apparently you’re sad and mopey. 🤓

LoganT: I’m not sad and mopey. I’m brooding and there’s a big difference. 😠

Sunny: you’re 22 and your boyfriends are out of town. Chin up buddy and enjoy a Saturday of off key singing and recorder hell. And you are moping 😆 brooding is for grown-ups… 

Nado: we’d offer to take you to some strip clubs and get you laid but. Well. We don’t really frequent gay bars so. 

Sergei: really? I once had to rescue u 2 from drag club 😂

Nado: it was one time and we didn’t realize until we were inside. Felt like a fucking Kingggg man they know how to party. Wanna go to a drag club baby Logan? Is fun times! 

Kuny: was fun. But we promise to do show with baby Russians he he 👻👻👻👻

Nado: well i didn’t understand what i said yes to. Thought she asked if I wanted to play Pokémon. 😳

Sergei: that’s why she asked. She’s too sneaky. Not like it. What you do for show? 

Nado: no idea. Your wife is making us an outfit and told us to just stand in the background 🙈

Dumo: oh I’m recording this. Anyways there’s never any parking. You’d think with the obscene fees we pay for that school they could at least organize proper parking. Let’s carpool. 😎

LoganT: why are you carpooling? You’ve got like a combined car catalogue of 25 cars....... 

Brady: this is clearly Logan’s first rodeo. Okay. Sergei always brings some Russian elixir of life. So. We need you to drive. 😘

LoganT: IM NOT DRIVING A MINI VAN! IVE GOT A REP 

Nado: there’s alcohol involved? I’m in!! 🥳🥳🥳🥳

Sunny: only way to get through this....😔

Dumo: you don’t have a rep. You have two boyfriends, an accent and a sweaty hat. You’re driving and I’m not going to argue. 😠 

—- 

Saturday 12.33 pm 

Dumodad: if anyone is wondering what the terrible two are up to this fine Saturday. They’re currently in the middle of a moving rendition of Into the Unknown. Yes they’re wearing blue sequins. 🤩

*kuny and nado dressed in blue glitter sequins onesies with a bunch of kids singing into the unknown* 

Prongstar: HHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA WHAT IS GOING ONNNN???? 

Blizzard: well. There’s a future in show biz for those two. 😂 kuznetsov and nadeau the movie. 

Bradygunz: this is giving me some fresh prince vibes little rays of sunshine!!!😂😂😂😂 @talkiewalkie 

Talkiewalkie: yesss!!! Hahahah 😎😎😎

 ——- 

Saturday 1.22 pm 

Sunny: I love my kids but. There’s a reason it’s not a good idea to always just tell kids they’re good at stuff.

Dumo: hahahah the one with the juggling was fun. 

LoganT: why are we still here? I won’t ever get my hearing back after that bag pipe thing. 😭

Sergei: that’s why we drink. I like the politic ones like a kid could ever know so many isms 

Sunny: quit hogging the flask. Gimme. 

Brady: I didn’t know so many isms existed. Pretty sure some of them were just random words. 😂

——

Saturday 2.01 pm

Logantremblayzzz: guess who’s pissed at a kids talent show. Guess who’s hit on every teacher and has suspiciously disappeared and guess who’s somehow ended up in a production of you’re welcome from Moana? 

Sirius: this is fun.... 1) the dads are pissed. I went to a school play with them once. Sergei brought his flask? 2) I wanna say Nado 3) Kuny? 

Blizzard: ohhh I’ve got 2/3 swapped - Kuny can’t sing in English... and nado’s got the tattoos 😂

Eliascookie: I wanna know more about the sequins? 🥳

Prongstar: tell us!!!  

Logantremblayzzz: 1) yes the dads. Sergei swears it’s only mild vodka. But they’re definitely not sober. 2) Kuny was missing but I found him. He is hiding in the library. 3) yes Nado has somehow ended up on stage again. He’s doing that pec thing it’s weird. I swear the moms here are swooning. He signed someone’s bra. ITS A SCHOOL. 

KrisVolley: you’re just cranky that you had to drive the mini van. Haha! 😂

CarbO’Hara: Logan! You drove a minivan? 🤪🤪🤪🤪 cuteeee 

Logantremblayzzz: it’s stupid and ugly. 🥴 

Dumodad: suits you then 🤪

Logantremblayzzz: I’m telling your wives. 

Sergei_81: no Logan. Don’t be mean. U can have my car 

Bradygunz: we don’t tell Celeste when you leo and Finn cause problems!!!! 

Dumodad: he’s bluffing! Remember who let you live FOR FREE in his basement! I do your laundry and feed you. 

Logantremblayzzz: celeste feeds me and does laundry. You’re just as much a leech. 

Dumodad: I pay for things. 😠

RussianGod: I don’t know where are. Books everywhere help I hide from moms so many everywhere 😳😳😳😳

Ollibear: someone please rescue Kuny before the soccer moms kidnap him 😂

Timmyforrealz: wow Kuny go get some cougar love 🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯 hehehehe 

RussianGod: I scared. Help. @dumodad @logantremblayzzz @sergei_81!!!!!! Help help 

Sunnysideup: DONT flirt with them then. You asked for it. I’ll come get you. Stay in the library. You’re missing nado singing. 

——

Saturday 2.12 pm 

Logan: hey Celeste. Show is ok. How’s the spa??? ❤️❤️❤️

Celeste: charmer... it’s fine thank you - how are the boys?

Logan: uh. Well. 

Celeste: one sec love. 

—-

Celeste added Logan to the group chat 

Celeste: hi Logan! Please tell us about the show. How did the terrible two do with their performance 

Logan: well Katya got scared and refused to go on stage so Kuny had to hold her hand. It was really cute. Loved the outfits. They’re definitely never forgetting that 😂 other than that your husbands are sneaking drinks from sergei’s flask and Nado has been in stage for the past three performances 

Anya: he did what? I will kill him. Thank you for telling us Logan. Tell zhenya to be careful. Soccer moms are hungry.

Logan: will do. Want me to kick your husbands? 

Anya: no love. We have our own ways to punish our idiots 😈

Linnea: thanks Logan! 

Celeste removed Logan from the group chat. 

Celeste: well. I knew we couldn’t leave them alone. But the plan worked well - they’ve now signed themselves up for the events for the rest of the school year! 😎

Allison: 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 

—-

Celeste: Logan texted me. Do you have any idea how much trouble you all are in? Also someone go rescue Kuny. He’s not ready for a soccer mom. 😈

Dumo: I’m gonna kill that kid. Also sorry. But. There was a BAGPIPE. You’re very pretty and beautiful and I love you. Sunny has gone to rescue Kuny. 

Celeste: hmm. How are you going to fix it? 

Dumo: I’ll show you 😜 on my knees 👅

Celeste: 😈

[sithsecrets]

Turn Off the Shyness

The new waitress at Duck Tape has been in love with her boss for months... though it seems he’s too oblivious to notice.

---

1.4k words

Mentions: pining, maybe a little bit of self-deprecation

---

The parking lot is empty and still all around you as you head outside, Duck Tape’s patrons long gone now. It would seem that the tomorrow’s responsibilities beckoned them home early on this sleepy weeknight, early enough to make Clyde decide to shut the bar down a couple hours short of closing. You’re not upset that your shift’s been cut short— quite the opposite, actually.

That’s one more chore off the list, you think, standing on your tiptoes as you haul the bag of trash in your hand up and over the lip of the dumpster. It’s a warm night, warm enough to stick your hair to the back of your neck, and you find yourself craving air conditioning as you turn to go back in the bar. But just as you’re almost there, just as you’re getting ready to go up the steps, you catch a glimpse of something through the window that makes you stop short.

Clyde stands behind the counter, a rag in one hand and a clean glass in the other. He doesn’t notice you staring from outside, too absorbed in his work, but you still feel bad nonetheless. It’s unfair, in your opinion, how he can make even the most mundane action look so damn good. It’s unfair that Clyde is so nice, too, that he’s such a good boss.

It’s unfair that Clyde has your heart, though he doesn’t care to do anything with it.

You hate yourself then, both for staring and for having a crush on your boss. You’re too old for all this, too grown up. You should just recognize that Clyde doesn’t see you that way, accept it, and move on…

But that is so much easier said than done.

Clyde Logan had your heart from the minute you met him, if you’re honest with yourself. How could you not have been struck by him, what with those soft brown eyes and that smile of his? It’s a miracle you made it through your little job interview, in hindsight. You don’t even remember what you said, really, just that Clyde was happy to hire you after that ten-minute conversation. And so, you’ve been waiting tables at the Duck Tape ever since, pining over Clyde in secret as you dole out beers and shots and the occasional mixed drink. He likes you well enough, you think, but he’s never once shown interest in you. You tried back in the day when you first got hired, dropped a couple of hints and made a point of coming to work looking real pretty, all just for him. It made you feel a bit ashamed of yourself, making advances towards your boss, but only because you never thought you’d be the type of person to do such a thing. Breaking the “rules” isn’t something you do often, and the fact that you even wanted to for Clyde was slightly scary.

Now, though, the whole thing is mostly just painful. Clyde never took the bait, you stopped casting your hooks, and nothing’s changed in all the months you’ve worked at the bar. It gets harder and harder all the time as your feelings for Clyde get stronger and stronger. Sometimes you think you should quit before you do something stupid, but you just can’t bring yourself to do that. You really do like your job, and not just because Clyde’s there. Besides, what would you even tell him? “Sorry, Mr. Logan, I can’t work at the bar anymore because I love you too much. When should I pick up my last check?” You can’t just say something like that to a person and expect things to end well…

You realize that you’ve been outside for far too long now, but it seems like Clyde never noticed, greeting you casually when you come through the door. You aren’t sure if that stings more than it makes you feel relieved, but you force yourself not to dwell on it.

“I could have gotten the trash,” Clyde says to you, wiping down one of the last few glasses now. You join him behind the counter, grabbing a rag so you can help him finish up.

“It’s alright,” you say with a shrug, forcing a smile. “I’m a big girl.”

“Still,” Clyde insists, reaching for the last wet glass now, “you really should let me take the trash out when we’re closin’ up. I don’t like you walkin’ around outside by yourself like that at night.”

The sincerity in Clyde’s voice makes your chest ache, makes you feel like bursting into tears right then and there. In that moment, you want to throw your arms around Clyde, want to kiss him and tell him just how you feel. But you shouldn’t, and you can’t, and God, you don’t think you can take much more of this.

Everything you’re feeling must show plainly on your face, because Clyde’s expression shifts to one of concern. “Are you okay?”

You take one look at Clyde’s face, at the way he’s looking at you, and decide that enough is enough. You don’t care if this all blows up in your face, if he fires you— you can’t keep going on like this.

“Clyde,” you say softly. “What do you think of me?”

“Whatddaya’ mean?”

“I mean… How do you feel about me?”

“I think you’re great,” Clyde answers, not even hesitating. “You’ve been a real big help around the bar, and all the customers certainly like ya’ a lot.”

“Is that it, though?” you press. You’re getting worked up now, there’s a lump in your throat. “Is that all you think of me? That I’m a good waitress?”

Clyde looks really concerned now, face all pinched up. He must be able to tell that you’re about to cry, that you’re getting upset. “Where is all this coming from? What’s the matter?”

You shake your head then, embarrassed that you even let yourself have this little outburst. “I… Nothing. Never mind, forget I said anything. I’ll see you tomorrow night, Clyde.”

You make a beeline for the back room, juts wanting to get your purse and go at this point. Clyde’s not having it though, he won’t let you go so easily.

“Now wait just a minute,” he declares, catching your wrist. “I’m not lettin’ you leave my bar upset. Please, just tell me what’s wrong.”

Still, even after all Clyde’s insisting, you hesitate to tell the truth. Finally, though, something in your snaps.

“I love you, Clyde, but I know that you don’t love me,” you confess. “That’s what’s wrong.”

Clyde looks like he’s been slapped, wide-eyed and slack jawed as looks at you. His hand falls away from your arm, hanging limply at his side as he stumbles and stammers.

“You— You love me?” he asks dumbly, speaking as if he just can’t believe it. You huff and puff at that, completely exasperated now.

“Yes, Clyde,” you affirm. “I’ve loved you since you hired me. How did you not notice?”

Clyde is all flustered now, hands fidgeting. “Were you— Did you flirt with me?”

Your exasperation festers, though you can’t bring yourself to be truly annoyed. “When I first started workin’ here, yes. I would spend hours pickin’ out my clothes before I came to work just prayin’ you’d notice and think I was pretty. I tried to hint around that I wanted you to take me to the fair when it was in town, but you never caught on. I just figured you didn’t—”

You don’t get to finish that thought, though, your mouth occupied with far more important matters as Clyde sweeps you up in his arms for a kiss. It feels surreal, like you’re dreaming, but you realize after several seconds that all of this is, to your delight, very much real.

“I did like you,” Clyde breathes, pulling away from your lips just enough so he can speak. “I just— I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, bein’ your boss and all. I did notice you dressin’ up, I promise. And I’m so sorry I was too stupid to notice that you wanted me to take you out to the fair. Let me make it up to you. I’ll take you out, we can go somewhere nice. I’ll—”

And then it’s your turn to cut Clyde off with a kiss, hauling him down the collar of his shirt so you can lick into his mouth. Clyde kisses you back just as fiercely, just as hungrily, and then you’re pulling away so you can make your intentions clear.

“I don’t want you to make it up to me,” you pant, flustered. “I want you to love me the way I love you, always.”

“I can do that,” Clyde affirms, and then he’s coming right back down for more.

[foreverfangirlalways]

What’s Your Name? (Chapter 2)

Chapter Title: Coffee, Cafes, and Conversations

Summery: Logan talks with Remy, and Virgil tells Patton about his encounter. Remy and Virgil also have a very interesting phone call.

Ships: Analogical, RemyxCriticxEmile, Moceit

Warning: teasing, threats, foreshadowing, pastshadowing(?), obvious gays being oblivious

-let me know if I need to add more warnings-

(please give some love to my wonderful cowriter @star-crossed-shipper, as well as @kuroyurishion, who has given me quite a few ideas for future chapters!)

/I totally projected my best friend and I’s dynamic onto Remy and Virgil’s dynamic, incase anyone is wondering why they act like they do!\

<A super mega thank you to @winterknight1087! They give me ideas on Remy’s partners and certain plot points for this chapter, including the bit about why Logan got a job working for Remy!>

*if you want, message me or comment with theories of what happens next! I’ll credit you of course, I just want readers input on how the story should go!*

—-

Logan had just finished restocking the sugar racks when Remy came busting through the door.

“What’s up bitches? Your favorite insomniatic slut is here and just got two cuties to love and cherish!”

Remy sat on the counter and Logan handed Remy his specialty coffee, totally not trying to butter him up or anything.

“Ah, my favorite employer. You have returned. So, how did your romantic endeavors go? Was my guess of woe correct?” Logan asked, watching Remy take a big gulp of his drink the sigh.

“Nope! It was what onderful! He was so sweet, likes cartoons, and even helps people! He’s an angel. I’ve been friends with him since middle school, and we were just catching up. His boyfriend is just like him, and we were actually partners in a few classes when I was still in college. We all met at the park and then went for brunch. I commented on how they look like such a happy couple and I wish I could have that, and then they invited me to join in their relationship! They both confessed to liking me and long story short, I am now in a polygamous relationship with my childhood friend Critic and my psychology partner Emile!”

“Wow.” Logan said, looking faintly surprised. “I’m impressed. You got two boyfriends and I didn’t even manage to get his name.”

Remy whipped around and hopped off the counter. He set down his drink and leaned over the counter with his chin atop his hands.

“So Logie,” Remy smirked, “whose the guy? You told me that you pride yourself on being able to make people trust you enough to get names from them without using your fae magic. That’s the whole reason you wanted this job. Well, aside from having the privilege of working for me, of course.”

Logan nodded. “I know. People typically throw their names at me way too trustingly, but I don’t think he trusts very easily. It’s a shame, he is extremely aesthetically appeasing. I even tried to non-magically charm him and it still didn’t work. He definitely has walls.”

Remy nods like he understands, but the smirk has yet to leave his face.

“Ooo, so Logan, who’s the hottie that evaded you and your flirting? Was he a regular?”

Logan shook his head. “I’ve never seen him before but he said he knows you.”

Remy raises his eyebrow and takes a sip of his drink.

“The name he gave me was Anxiety.”

“SPPPTTHTT!” Remy spewed out coffee. Logan looked alarmed, but Remy more so.

“No shit?! He visited? And I missed it? You think he’s hot? Oh, oh Logan. I’ve known Anx my whole life, he’s like a little brother. All I can say is good luck. And be patient.”

Logan wipes up the mess and responds. “I shall take your words into consideration. I’ll admit, I got frustrated because he has been the first to give me a false name, and I really wanted his name, but if it takes time for me to break down his walls it shall be time well spent.”

Remy nods and a very serious look passed over his face. He grabs Logan by the tie, pulling, and Logan is so startled he drops his rag.

“It will be time well spent because if you even so much as accidentally put too much foam into his ‘Damnit Karen’, I will fire you in more ways then one. Am I understood?”

“Perfectly.” Logan said while straitening his tie. He then got an idea.

“Say Remy, what did you say his name was again?”

Remy tilts his head.

“Anxiety?”

“No, you called him by another name.”

Remy thought for a moment the made an ‘o’ with his mouth.

“Anx? Yeah, that’s just a childhood nickname I gave-“

Remy looks at Logan slightly disappointingly and crosses his arms.

“...him. And if you want his true name, you can make him trust you enough to get it without using your magic. And if you try with any of your tricks, keep in mind that I know just what type of paralyzing  nightmares to send your way.”

Logan blinked and picked up his rag. Despite his particular stand as a fae, he does not like people to know of it, and he does not like to use his magic on people.

However, Remy knows of Logan’s standing and magical capabilities, and is the only person that can truly intimidate Logan.

“I can tell that Anxiety is very close to you. And you are extremely protective of him. I never had any intentions of using magic on him, and if anything, that decision has just been solidified.”

Remy looked satisfied with that response. He started to walk away, and in a burst of nervous energy, recklessness, and perhaps a slight death wish, Logan called out.

“Remy, wait.”

Remy turned around and raised his eyebrow.

“Yes?”

Logan swallowed and adjusted his glasses.

“I promise I will never use magic on him unless I have your permission and his consent, but I was wondering if you would mind if I... try to get his name using different tactics?”

Remy crosses his arms and steps forward. “What tactics?”

“... uhh, well, charming him? If that is approvable.”

Remy swiped his hand over his face and huffed out a laugh. Then the laugh got stronger and he flopped into the nearest chair.

“So let me get the stra- let me get this gay, you want my permission to flirt with my little brother?”

“Yes...?”

Remy rolled his eyes. “For such a smart person, you are a complete dumbass. Do you remember when I told you about one of my friends that I basically adopted and we were roommates before I opened up shop?”

“Yes, you told me that we would be a cute couple and your ‘otp’ ?”

“Uhuh, the friend is Anxiety.”

Logan’s mouth dropped open in shock. Remy shook his head, still chuckling.

“Yes, I give you permission to flirt.”

“Thank you Remy. Would you like me to keep you updated? I could ‘spill the tea’ as you say.”

“Oh, absolutely! Now, excuses me, I have a brother to call and get his side of the story. And we are going to talk afterwards too, so don’t go to far! I’m sure you want to know if he finds you hot too.”

Logan finished up an order and smirked. “Oh, he does.”

Remy walked to his office and laughed. “I can’t wait to hear this.”

-_-_-_-

Virgil left Bitchin’ Brews, he headed straight to Sunshine Daycare.

‘Alright, so, Patton gets off at 12, five minutes. He can give me advice...’

Virgil stood beside the entrance, and waited. Patton exited, saw Virgil, and ran to him.

“Virgil! Hi! What are you doing here?” Patton asked while hugging him.

“Hey Pat. I was wondering if you wanna have lunch together? I kinda want to talk to you about a few things...”

Patton nodded and looped his arm through Virgil’s. “Sounds perfect. Let’s go to The Mindpalace Cafe and chat!”

Once they were seated and ordered their drinks, Virgil cleared his throat.

“Ok, so, I wanted to talk to you and get advice about this thing that happened this morning. I went to go see Remy, but he was not there. There was the really attractive barista, and he told me Remy was out, getting a boyfriend or something.”

Patton nodded along, but was slightly confused.

“Ok I get that, but I don’t understand what’s wrong?”

“Well... he’s fae. He asked for my name, got upset when I said Anxiety, and completely blanched when I called him out on being fae.”

Patton instantly became concerned. He grabbed Virgil’s arm, started checking his pulse.

“Did he enchant you? Your pulse is normal, but did he? Is that what this is about? I’m so sorry Virgil, I can’t believe this happened aga-“

Virgil leaned over and pressed his hand to Patton’s mouth.

“No, nothing like that. He didn’t enchant me or anything, he just got a bit frustrated with me for not giving my name.”

Removing his hand and seeing that Patton’s still confused, he continued.

“I need you thoughts and advice because... he flirted with me to get my name. No enchant, regular flirting. I didn’t give it to him, of course, but how do I go back? That’s my favorite coffee shop, Remy is there, you are laughing. Why are you laughing?”

Patton composed himself and shook his head. “Virgil, sweetie, as one of your best friends I say this to you with the upmost respect... you’re kind of stupid.”

Virgil looked as insulted as he felt.

“Please don’t be offended Verge, I just don’t understand your problem. A person you find attractive, flirted with you, didn’t enchant or take advantage of you in anyway, and only got slightly offended. I see nothing wrong.”

Virgil couldn’t believe his ears. He rubbed his forehead, trying not to groan aloud.

“Seriously Pat? I’m anxious about everything! I don’t trust the fae, and I don’t know if I can trust the barista. How can I go to Remy’s if I can’t trust the person who works there?”

Patton pondered that. After a few moments, he held up a hand.

“Oh! I know!”

“Yes Patton?”

“Talk to Remy. If he has done nothing wrong, simply ask Remy if you think it would be wise to stay in contact with the cute barista. He will understand your concerns.”

Virgil was amazed. He fiddled with the edge of his sleeve and looked up.

“That’s great advice! Uhhh, I should have thought of it.”

Giggling, Patton patted Virgil on the head. “It’s ok, here’s a Patton pat. At least we get lunch!”

After lunch, Patton and Virgil parted. Virgil heads to his dorm, and his phone rings as soon as he shuts the door.

“Remy? Hey! What’s up?”

“Bitch, how the hell am I supposed to know? You never talk to me anymore!”

“Hey, don’t blame me, I came by today, and you weren’t there.”

Remy sighed. “Yeah, sorry about that. I was at a brunch. Speaking of, do you remember Critic?”

Virgil removed his boots and jumped onto his bed.

“The Critic you wanted to ask to prom but chickened out? Both years?”

“Yes you asshole. That Critic. I thought I said we were never to mention that again?”

“No, you said you wouldn’t. I just got more ice cream for you.”

“ALRIGHT! Enough about that, anyways, the reason I asked was because I am now dating Critic and his boyfriend Emile.”

“The sa-“

“Yes! That Emile.”

Virgil laughed. “Alright, congrats dude! I’ll give them the brother talk next time I see them.”

“No, please don’t. Changing subject, what happened when you came to the shop?”

Taking a deep breath, Virgil prepared himself. “Well, I met your barista. He’s fae. And he asked for my name.”

“What happened? He didn’t do anything wrong, did he?” Remy asked, knowing full well what happened but still getting ready to commit murder if Virgil said yes.

“No no, nothing like that. He was a bit frustrated that I gave a fake name, but other than that everything seemed fine. I just don’t know what to do. He’s really attractive, but he’s also fae, and he works for you...”

Remy huffed out a laugh. “So, you think he’s attractive?”

“Really? That’s what you got? That I think he’s hot?”

“Yep!” Remy responded, popping the p.

Rolling his eyes, Virgil decided to take Patton advice. “Yes, but I’m not sure I can trust him. I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but I don’t think I could continue to go to Bitchin’ Brews if I can’t trust the barista.”

“Verge, I’ve talked to him. I already knew about the meeting. He was a bit irked having not gotten your name, but that’s just because you were the first person to not freely give it to him. He has already swore to never enchant anyone at my shop, and he told me that he will never use any magic on you unless you ask first. It is up to you, but I think he’s a good guy.”

Virgil sighed, relieved and grateful for the good report.

“Oh, and one other thing,” Remy said, smirk evident in his voice. “He finds you hot as well.”

Virgil groaned and Remy laughed. They continued talking until around six, when Virgil was promptly told to, “go get some damn food in you, ya twig!”

Virgil eventually went to bed, and had decided that he would give the cute barista a chance, but definitely make him work for the name.

----

Gen Taglist-

@dragonwithproblems

@five-falseh00ds-ph0nated

@thefingergunsgirl

@kawaiikat54

@sanders-sides-with-quinn

@007ardra

@yikesdodson

@nerdycupcake559

@softestvirgil

@teacupfulofstarshine

@impatentpending

@star-crossed-shipper

@ravenivy2079

@rainbowemonightmare

@ladyartemisia28

@moose-boi

@resident-trash-goblin

@parx-boiiz

@ninathepancake

@kuroyurishion

@funkyfreshfatherfigure

@pattoncake-and-eyeshadow 

@drewwwbydoobydoo

@sure-i-exist

@sophiexteresa

WYN? Tagist-

@tranquil-space-ninja

@antiredhuman

@enby-phoenix

@tired-yeetling

@gothfoxx

@grouptalekindnesssoul

@pricklyfish777

[gaylotusthatexists]

au au au au

alright recently i’ve really been wanting to write some momceit and also i’ve been watching gravity falls so uh. my brain somehow combined that and got janus adopts virgil and logan, they move into this small town, weird shit goes on, janus is gay for patton, the twins roman and remus try to solve mysteries and drag virgil and logan into it.

anyway uhhh here some info about the au bc goddamn i’m excited about this. (all character drawings were made using this picrew)

Virgil Sanders

fourteen years old

he/him or they/them pronouns

only really trusts logan

not at all happy to be living with janus

desperately wants to be goth but doesn’t have the confidence, results in him going through his emo phase

should probably be seeing a therapist

people think he’s a compulsive liar when really he’s just sarcastic and doesn’t want to open up to anyone

open to committing crimes

Logan Sanders

sixteen years old

he/him pronouns

virgil annoys him every single day

still, he’s a Protective Older Brother

has so many thoughts but only comfortable talking about them with virgil

maybe he annoys virgil a little too

everything he does is for Science

doesn’t really trust janus but is willing to stick around simply because of the weird stuff going on which he wants to study

you’d think he’s a grade-a student, but really he sucks at school, as a result of moving around so much and also being much more interested in his own research than school stuff

Janus Sanders(?)

thirty-two years old

any pronouns will do, but tends to stick with he/him for simplicity

apparently virgil and logan’s uncle, despite the fact they have never met this man in their life

town cryptid - no one quite knows where he came from or how he makes his money, and he always seems to get up to weird shit

possibly a scientist? has been caught many times wandering into the nearby forest with a bunch of weird equipment

enjoys committing petty crimes, has never been caught

only ever seems to talk to his neighbour patton. townsfolk suspect there is something else going on with that

Patton Prince

thirty-four years old

he/him pronouns

people often mistake him for a child, even though he has two teenage sons

owns a pet shop in the town

made many mistakes when younger and still figuring out his sexuality and ended up with two sons, who he promised to take care of after their mother wanted nothing to do with patton

still loves his sons more than anything

in love with janus

thinks he’s doing a good job of hiding his crush, but everybody knows

too kind for his own good

Roman Prince

fifteen years old

he/him pronouns

a force of chaos (along with his brother)

self proclaimed ‘monster hunter’

flirts with everyone he sees, but not too fused about actually being in a relationship

came out as transgender at fourteen

lowkey wants to know what happened to his mother, but knows better than to ask patton

Remus Prince

fifteen years old

he/him pronouns

somehow even more chaotic than his brother

often sneaks out with janus to commit crimes (patton knows nothing of this but would not be impressed if he found out)

started the whole ‘monster hunting’ business but refuses to refer to himself as a monster hunter

he is both clumsy and stupid, so is basically injuried twenty-four/seven

surprisingly, a straight-a student, which roman absolutely hates him for

five inches taller than roman. roman also hates this.

so yeah those are the bois, this does have a sort of plot (although very loose probably) and i have already written part of the first chapter, honestly i’m just. very excited about this asdjfkdhs. i’m not gonna go into the plot rn (may make another post? idk) but it will especially focus around the four teens finding weird shit in the town + two very exasperated parents, as well as unravelling a greater mystery along the way.

so yeah uh that’s that. if anyone wants to be tagged when i get the first chapter of this up (or any other posts about it) let me know :) thank u