#he’ll be ok i think.. he’s had a bad reaction to his new meds..

[jasonisaacs]

my dad is back in the hospital again :(

[skellebonez]

Because you are a fantastic writer, and because I simply adore what you write, how about a continuation to the "Wukong is once again being an idiot and lying to everyone" prompt? And this is an open prompt! You can take this and go absolutely bonkers with it!

THE POWER YOU HAVE GIVEN ME SHALL NOT GO UNDERUTILIZED. This is a follow up to these two previous fills and I am just going off about what I think would be an interesting way to continue into season 3 at this point.

Warning: UH... Sun Wukong is not doing too great. Mild descriptions of his hidden injuries, Wukong is still immortal but what he hid would be very bad for people who are not.

"He's burning up," Pigsy said with a hiss as he pulled his hand away from Wukong's forehead. "Why is he burning up? What even happened to him!? He didn't look like this an hours ago, ain't he immortal-"

"Yeah, but not invincible," MK interrupted with a shake in his voice, watching as Sandy checked on his mentor's newly revealed injuries. "Not entirely anymore. He-he'll probably be fine! No, he will be fine, but he's-shit." He took in a shaky breath, trying to stand on legs that had long since fallen asleep in their awkward position holding his mentor's head off the hard floor. "I'll explain later, we need to see how bad he is now!"

He jumped, feeling a soft touch against his shoulder. Mei had knelt beside him at some point and it wasn't until she reached over to brush her thumb against his cheek that he realized he had started crying at some point.

The chef looked at him with an odd expression at MK's revelations, almost looking like he wanted to say something in anger before shaking his head and standing instead.

"You're right," he said as he turned to Sandy. He didn't need to ask the largest of the group anything, watching as he carefully scooped the Monkey King into his arms and headed off into what they had designated as "the med bay" with Tang following close by. "But you're gonna tell us exactly what that you mean by 'not entirely invincible' on the way, no more of this waitin to talk business! And we're going to walk there calmly."

MK couldn't find it in himself to argue.

~

"Well, shit," Pigsy sighed after MK rushed through the conversation he had shared with his mentor, pinching the bridge of his snout with a sigh. "That's... bad. That explains a whole lot about a lot of stuff, like how he managed to get himself caught on New Years, at least... You're sure he's still immortal?"

"Yeah," MK nodded, leaning into the grip Mei had on his shoulder as they walked. "Yeah, he made it a point to insist he still couldn't die."

"That's... good, right?" Mei offered with a chuckle, her usual exuberance seeming shaken up after seeing the state of the immortal monkey. "That means he'll get better!"

They paused at the entrance to the med bay, really more a spare bedroom they had stocked all the medical supplies Sandy apparently hoarded into, and MK gulped. He thought over Wukong's words, trying to find any piece he could to pick it apart. See exactly what, if anything, may have been just more half truths... he didn't want to believe he was still hiding things, not after that display of dropping the glamor. But MK himself had claimed he would explain everything to the others before... and lied still... and he was more like Sun Wukong than he first realized.

"I-I think so," he finally settled on an answer as they walked in, Sandy's back being the first sight they were greeted with. He could see the bottom half of Wukong's legs and feet, and Tang standing on the opposite side of the bed, as they were doing... something. "He said I was half invincible so... maybe he's still half himself? But he said they'd 'probably heal eventually' so..."

"Maybe he just meant they wouldn't scar!" Mei offered with a smile, moving to grip MK's hand. "Come on... we can't stop thinking about the good outcomes now..."

He turned, looking at his best friend. Her smile was off, uncertain, dark circles under her eyes from lack of sleep. None of them had slept well the last two nights. But her eyes, despite the uncertainty they shared with her smile, were as bright and hopeful as ever.

"Yeah..." MK said with a small smile.

"As much as we'd appreciate the help," Tang said suddenly, moving from behind the bed to stand before them. He had removed his scarf and robe, something that looked bizarre and wrong outside of seeing him in his sleep wear, and instead wore a simple tank top and his regular pants. He had gloves on... already spotted in red. "This room is a little cramped with all five of us and a bed."

"I'll go make us food," Pigsy said immediately, laying a hand on MK's back as he addressed Tang. "We don't gotta eat it when it's finished it's just... gonna be ready for when you're done, ok?"

MK couldn't help but smile a bit. Pigsy didn't just make food and let it sit, not normally. The only other time he could ever remember him doing that was after... DBK. After they volunteered to help clean up the city from the damage his possession caused. He'd made pots and pots of noodles and soup and plates of side dishes and buns and just kept them warm for when anyone came by to eat them. He stayed in his shop, waiting and handing out what he could.

He never once complained about the excess from the last batches, offering them for free to the first few customers the next day if they wanted it.

"Thanks, Pigsy," Tang said with a tired smile. "I think everyone is going to appreciate that."

"I'll finish the ship upkeep Sandy and I were doing," Mei offered, smiling at Sandy when he looked over his shoulder. "I've got a pretty good handle on the specifics by now."

"I trust you," Sandy said with a smile, the first thing he had said the entire time he'd joined them in the kitchen, and turned back to what he was doing.

There was an awkward silence as Tang started grabbing supplies from a cabinet to deposit on a nearby table and Pigsy and Mei turned to MK.

"I'm staying," he said firmly, but nothing could hide the shaking in his hands. "Just... I have to know how bad he is."

"OK," Pigsy said, and they made their way out before Mei turned back inside.

"When he wakes up? Give him one of these for me," she said before making a face and leaving in the opposite direction.

There was just enough of a chuckle that escaped him that MK thought he would be able to do that.

"Are you sure you want to see this?" Tang asked, far softer in tone than he had been before. "Sandy and I were already taking stock of his injuries and... MK, they're not good."

"Yeah, I'm sure," he insisted, taking in a calming breath. "I need to know exactly how angry I need to be at him."

His father figure didn't laugh, but there was amusement in his eyes as he returned back to where he was. "Alright, then you're going to need to help by handing me everything I ask for."

They settled into silence after that, and MK watched and Tang and Sandy worked to check on the unconscious immortal in the bed.

They had stripped off his robe, leaving him only in the pants he wore underneath it. He looked... he looked much worse without it on.

In addition to his eye (which seemed to have been the only hidden injury to have already healed as much as it may have) and the tear in his ear (which seemed to have at least been partly treated by himself already) his torso was littered with little cuts and scrapes. Sandy had rolled up the legs on his pants, one remaining upright and MK could see the slight swell of his knee from some kind of internal injury (probably muscular). His tail and arms were also similarly injured, one nasty gash in particular close to the end of the tail that had gotten almost as much treatment as his ear.

But on his side... there was sloppy bandaging slowly growing redder.

"Sandy, help me get this off him," Tang said, holding out his hand. "Scissors, please."

MK jolted, getting what Tang requested from the pile of stuff, watching as he carefully cut away the wrapping.

Tang winced as he finally lifted the dressing from Wukong's side, but did his model best to look as impassive as possible. There was a sizeable gash on it, large enough that Tang's entire hand barely covered it lengthwise, that had poorly treated with the lopsided gauze and bandages (probably stolen from this very room after he allowed them to treat his visible injuries). Blood had seeped through it, all fresh, and it was most likely reopened upon his fall. It looked... wrong. Not the way it should. The fur around it had been either ripped out or had fallen out and the skin was inflamed and angry.

"... no wonder he's burning up, this is becoming infected," he said evenly, detected, leaning over to look at the supplies he took from the medicine cabinet. "Sandy, I'm going to need your help moving him. MK?" He turned to the young man, face softening as he saw how pale his face had gotten at the revelations before him. "MK, I heard what you were telling Mei and Pigsy earlier. Mei's probably right, he'll be ok. OK?"

MK wanted to believe he had been, he'd been so honest after he told him to stop lying, but... but he still couldn't help but worry his mentor was still hiding more. And he felt so guilty thinking that. But he shook his head, dispelling the thoughts in his head.

"OK... what do you need?"

"Let's start with antiseptic. We need to clean this as quickly as possible."

~

It took longer than MK had hoped. And Sun Wukong had only barely stirred the entire time. Whether it was from the infectious fever or from exhaustion from using his remaining powers while sick he didn't know, but the most of a reaction they got him from was a sharp gasp and a twitch while cleaning the worst of his wounds.

Aside from that... nothing. He remained still, even as Sandy moved him without any effort and guided Tang through the medical stuff he wasn't sure how to handle.

MK knew Tang had some first aid training but this was much more than he expected him to pull off... he supposed he was learning a lot.

After a while Tang didn't need Sandy's help to move him anymore and the massive man shot MK an apologetic look before leaving. MK assumed he had left to wash up, and he did, but he eventually returned completely cleaned up with a hot cup of tea. It was the same flavor as the one he never got to finish during his conversation earlier.

He ruffled MK's hair after the young man gratefully took it, making Wukong more comfortable on Tang's instruction and pulling the covers over everything but one arm before saying something about needing to give Mei some tea as well, before leaving the three of them alone again. MK thought that, maybe, the sight of the Monkey King as he was was somehow making him... uncomfortable. No, not uncomfortable.

Sad.

He didn't say anything.

"He looked... almost fine when he saved me..." MK said after a long sip of his tea and a long silence of watching Tang handle everything else on his own, trying to squeeze his cup. Just like when he had tried before, it stayed firm. "He wasn't hurt then, not by LBD, so... he'd been keeping up those illusions since before he came. How long was he hurt?"

"There isn't really a way for us to know," Tang admitted, wrapping the fresh gauze around the king's arm as carefully as he could manage. It wouldn't have mattered if he wasn't careful, Wukong didn’t stir a bit. "It could have been hours... could have been days. With how quickly his eye healed vs his gash it's hard to tell. But my guess would be hours, given when you... when..." He trailed off, a shudder running through him. "He was actively giving you his powers, yeah? Maybe... he was giving you some of his healing abilities. Or maybe something else hurt his eye long before everything else. We just don't know."

"I think that was from Macaque," MK said with a wince, knowing he was going to have to explain more about who Macaque was eventually. "He said LBD has him under her control and he has the same injury on the opposite eye."

Tang froze for a half a second, the shine of the overhead lights on his glasses keeping Mk from seeing just what kind of expression he had. But he simply nodded, finishing up his work.

"We'll just... have to hope he'll be able to give us some better information when he wakes up," Tang said with a shrug as he removed his gloves. "This is all probably a mystery even to him... I'm going to wash up... will you be alright alone?"

"Yeah."

That was a lie, but he felt at least this one was warranted.

Because even if he wouldn't be fine he didn't want to leave.

~

It was nearly 11 hours before Sun Wukong opened his eyes again, though he didn't realize that at the time.

The morning sunlight was just barely shining through the window to the med bay, and he wondered for a moment why one of his eyes seemed to ache at the light and a tear rolled down his cheek from the strain at trying to see.

Then he remembered that he couldn't see out of it anymore. And the conversation with MK. And... passing out. In the kitchen.

This was definitely not the kitchen floor, which was bad. What he was laying on was soft and had something else laying on top of him. Which meant he had been moved to a bed.

Which meant he had been unconscious for more than a minute, which was the exact opposite of what he wanted.

He tried to move his left arm to cover his eye, but found something... holding it down. And with a little effort he moved his head, looking over to the side.

MK was slouched over on a chair, nearly face down on the blanket that covered him and holding his hand. In his other hand there was a comic book of some kind, horribly bent by his own face.

He had dark circles, much darker than he had the night before, under his eyes and there was a dried wetness on his cheeks that made Wukong's chest hurt at the sight.

He'd messed up... again. He shouldn't have held up the illusion, not for that long. He should have let it fall the moment they hit the drone and been honest instead of insisting that he go on his new Journey to the West on his own. Or at least let it fall the next day, when they questioned why he was so tired. So quiet. Why he was so still and wasn't running around the ship like they expected (the pulled muscle in his knee, which he very much noticed was tightly compressed by either a sleeve or a wrap, being the main culprit along side... that injury).

He sighed, doing his best to remove his hand from his student's carefully before gently resting it on his head and ruffling the hair there.

"...'m sorry, MK," He said tiredly. "No more secrets, I promise."

"You better mean that promise you asshole."

Wukong yelped and jumped, yelping again when it sent a jolt of pain down his side. "YOu're AwAKe!?"

MK sat up, almost smiling at the way his mentor sounded but holding it back. "Yeah... I kinda passed out after a while, but I woke up like... an hour ago? I've just been trying to get as much rest as I can, even if I'm not actually sleeping."

"That's... good," Wukong said with a nod, the way MK described the time frame feeling familiar. "So you saw... everything?"

"Everything."

"Well, shit."

"That's exactly what Pigsy said when I told him what happened," Mk said with a chuckle, reading over to grab a packet of some kind and a glass of water. "Tang gave me very specific instructions to make you take all of this. Or else."

"Or else... what?" Wukong chanced, raising an eyebrow.

"I dunno, I always took the medicine he gives me with that threat so I never got to find out," MK shrugged. "Pigsy says it's not worth finding out."

"I'll take his word for it," Wukong said with a sigh. It was probably best to take whatever it was regardless of threats, he could feel his fever still and he did not want to keep having to fight that off. So he took the medicine, a mixture of pills and some kind of powder MK mixed into his drink that made it taste oddly way too sweet and sour at the same time, and sighed as he closed his eyes again for a moment.

They sat in silence for only a minute before he spoke again.

"Your friends... did all this?" He gestured to himself, reaching up to feel the odd dressing on his ear.

"Tang and Sandy did," MK explained, and went on to tell him what happened. How they treated him. How Pigsy had food waiting for him now that he was awake. How MK stayed by his side just in case.

"Oh, and Mei wanted me to give you this," MK said before pausing, glowering at him in a way that looked odd on his student's face but probably would have looked horrifying on Mei.

"Oh... I made her that mad huh?"

"I think everyone is kinda angry at you to some degree," MK admitted before holding his mentor's hand again. "But... mostly we were worried. You're my mentor, and a part of our little group now. That's what we do. Worry about each other."

Sun Wukong felt another tear slip out of his injured eye, but not from strain.

It had been so long since anyone... worried about him.

He didn't know how much he missed knowing he was cared about like that.

[bluealmondpie]

haikyuu!boyfriends~

and i am back with the pretty setter squad! it took me a long time to decide which character and then after that i had to fumble over how corrupted or innocent i wanted him to be. i ended up choosing innocent bc fluff. maybe i'll write the not so safe for work(?) stuff another time. (^_^;)

bf!tobio-chan

* shy boi. head empty only volleyball so is understandably confused about his reactions to you.

* what are these new feelings? he just has no clue. what even is love? does he even know what romance is??? what is a date?

* wants to spend time with you but doesn't know how to say it... awkward bean he is

* probably asks if u wanna play volleyball with him HAHAHAHA will want to teach you also. u know how mika got pissed at daishou? same feels

* hinata best wingman tbh

* hinata and sugawara best wingmen. first two to notice the feelings and totally helped set you guys up with lots of *wink wink hint hint* (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧ (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

* anyway when he finally realises he likes u he is a red, blubbering mess.

* what is a date? 可以吃的吗? (is it something to eat?) LOLOLOL

* anyway hinata at least got the point through to him that he should bring u to eat during a date and so..... he brought you two to a speciality milk shop smh

* ok the yogurts were good give him some credit

* anyway most of your dates r either food dates or wanna-come-watch-game-tape-with-me type of dates omg this boy. just what even is love only volleyball

* u will b bored. mika/daishou vibes

* travels around a lot for pro vb matches so be prepared for late night video calls and super early good morning texts (who tf wakes up at 430am kags pls. just bc hinata wakes up at 5am, u don't need to one up him for everything)

* he doesn't really care if u come to his matches or not. bc you will both end up watching the game tape at his apartment. it's not a choice he will watch it with or without u

* he will obsess over the details and replay all the bits he wants to see. will nudge u or narrate the good points and the bad points. minimally just nod in response

* not especially cuddly but when you're watching game tape tgt he likes it when you sit between his legs

* like will set his chin on your head and just watch the match and b engrossed it in while drinking milk (STILL? baby you're old enough to do power curry advertisements). he'll be really quiet tho (focused!!)

* basically u are a giant pillow when he is watching tv. occasionally will even hook his legs around u to pull u closer to him to hug.

* you don't actually have to watch the tv with him, he doesn't mind if you just do whatever as long as u stay his warm pillow

* if he is sleepy he will move his head to rest on your shoulder and snuggle his face into the crook of your neck. that's a sign to turn off the tv or pause the tape and move so he will actually go to bed

* he is ticklish. if u feel like u need attention u can tickle him and immediately he will react

* he is ticklish AND competitive, so u have to b prepared for revenge and a tickle battle to the death

* n e way other than that i don't really see much skinship in your relationship like he is not fond of PDA and not fond of anything more than handholding and if he can avoid it he will

* he does like to hold you by the waist. or ruffle your hair. but only in private

* fav place to kiss you? top of your head, or temple

* fav place to be kissed? if he's not expecting it he gets shy no matter where so go for it (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

* has no idea what romance is, do u actually think he knows how to resolve arguments between u two? NO

* will ask hinata for help. bless his soul, hinata is best bro hinata gives him actually good advice!! unfortunately kags cannot replicate the ways of the sunshine child and so he has to look for someone else

* will never ask tsukki. tsukishima will also not answer, anyway.

* yamaguchi, lovely sweet baby, will give him good advice and even help to pick out flowers actually it was yachi who picked over his shoulder ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) what r these two up to

* yams will become his relationship advisor

* pls give yams lots of soggy fries as reward for saving your relationship

* when you're sick he will turn to suga for help bc suga is mom bc suga is domestic god and will make some porridge or soup for him to bring to u. all hail suga the kitchen god

* suga has given kags the recipe once but after the other first years had to rescue him from the resulting fire he never touched a stove again

*******

requests are open! (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

masterlist here (♡-♡)

*******

ah yes. i've been caught up in life recently and so have not had the time to post or write but i do have a long captains crack fic i've been working on LOL. it's very long. save me. i've also been really swamped at work recently so i just can't deal with life and any free time i get i will take a nap. my therapist does not approve but yet here we are with my poor self control and lack of motivation to get better. in other news i went to see the psychiatrist today for my meds and there was a cute med student who was asking the usual questions and i just blanked half the time cos he was cute

[ruthoakenshield]

The Lady in Black Leather (chapter 8)

The Lady in Black Leather (chapter 7)

You get back to the apartment with Aiden and Scarlett and they let you go off to your room. You sit down on the bed and sigh. It would be easier on you if you just moved in with Richard, but you truly felt you just needed a break from living with men and had a place of your own.

You took off your corset, carefully hanging it up to air out. You decided to get a few more so you weren’t wearing the same two all the time, if your finances allowed it this month. You took off your skinny jeans, socks, underwear and shirt and tossed everything into the laundry basket in the closet. Then you went into the bathroom, let down your hair and climbed into the shower.

You stood there under the warm water thinking about Richard, wondering if he was in his shower right now. You giggled at him calling you addicting. As you washed your hair and showered, you thought about your conversations with him since you met him and how he treated you.

You thought about your conversation with Graham in the bookstore and the car as he drove you to Richard’s place. You suddenly realized there was no way he could’ve gotten to the studio from Richard’s place in the short amount of time there was between you texting Scarlett and you arriving at the studio. You realized that Graham was one of the last people to leave the shop yesterday. You wondered if he knew about Richard’s party, maybe even convinced Richard to have one so they could hook you two up, and had planned with Scarlett to pick you up and take you to the party!

You chuckled, thinking back on all that Graham has said to you. He was always encouraging you to give Richard a chance and to let him date you. Was he trying to set you up with Richard? Was Scarlett and Aiden in on it too? You wondered.

You missed your parents, the way Graham talked to you in the car, reminded you of how your dad and grandpa talked to you. They often didn’t like the men you dated. Would they have liked Richard and his friends if heart attacks and strokes hadn’t claimed their lives? You hoped so.

You realized these friends all were different than what you and Scarlett normally would hang out with. Maybe it was a good thing for the two of you to meet them at the Squawking Raven that night, and maybe it was a good thing Scarlett went home with Aiden. It sure has changed both of your lives for seemingly the better.

You were still thinking about all of this when you got out of the shower and dried off. You wrapped the towel around you and walked into your room to find a box sitting on your bed. You looked around puzzled. Walking over to it you noticed a note.

Opening it, you found a message from Graham.

“Hey, sweetheart. I hope ya had fun at Rich’s party last night. Hope ya don’t mind, but I saw this and thought it would look smashing on ya for maybe a first date with Rich or a special event. He adores ya, Sweetheart. We all do. Enjoy the gift, it’s from all of us. We’re rooting for ya!” - Graham.

You open the box and see a gorgeous black velvet strapless gown with a black and silver brocade underbust corset. You are speechless. It looks like something someone would wear on the red carpet! You pull the dress out of the box and hold it up to you. It is floor length with a small train. Under the dress is a set of beautiful black and silver jewelry: A short collar length necklace with earrings and bracelet and a stunning ring.

You wonder what Graham knows that you don’t. You giggle and try the dress on. It is a little big on you, but you could have it taken in easily enough. You try on the corset and it fits you like a glove. You dance around the room giggling.

When you finally calm down, you put the jewlery in your jewelry box, then carefully put the dress back in the box since it will need to be altered slightly. You look for tags indicating where it was bought, but find none. You run your hand along the velvet and know that if you wear it around Richard, he won’t be able to stop petting you all night long. You grin.

You decide to wear the corset today as a teaser, and to thank Graham for it if you see him. You dig through your clothes and find your other pair of leather pants, the ones that fit a little looser, have cut outs on the lower legs, and are thicker leather. Then you pull out a long sleeve off the shoulder black shirt to put under the corset.

After you get dressed, you carefully comb out and oil your hair and then start to put it into one long five strand braid. You call for Scarlett to help you since you can only reach so far. Aiden follows her into your room and stops dead in his tracks when he sees you standing in front of the mirror in the corset and leather pants.

Scarlett comes over and helps you finish the braid and then helps you weave a silver ribbon through the braid, tying it off at the bottom.

You turn and go to the small jewelry box and dig around for your silver dangly earrings and necklace and put them on.

You turn and ask, “So??? Does this look okay?”

He looks at Scarlett, who is smirking, and he nods, completely at a loss for words.

Scarlett looks down at the box. “I take it you opened the gift?” she asks. You nod. “Yeah. It’s a gorgeous dress and I love the corset and jewelry. I’m gonna need to have the dress altered though, it’s a little big on me.” You say sheepishly.

“Did Graham really get these for me?” you ask with a raised eyebrow.

Scarlet beams, “Yup… with a little help.” She smirks. We were out shopping with him yesterday, since the rest of the guys had to work at the studio doing filming. He mentioned seeing us shopping and how he was trying to hook you and Rich up.” She giggled.

“He said Rich had mentioned wanting to take you to a certain place maybe for a first date if Rich could screw up enough courage to ask you out, and asked me if you had anything fancy to wear for it. I told him no, since we just purged your closet and it would take a while to build it back up. Don’t worry, Sweetheart, I told him you’re on an all black clothing kick lately, but that a splash of color here and there should be considered on special occasions.” She tells you giggling.

Aiden just watches the two of you with a knowing smirk. Trying to gauge your reaction to the very expensive gift. You looked down at the dress again and ran your fingers over the soft velvet.

“If I wear this, Rich will be petting me all night long. He already can’t seem to keep his paws off of me!” you giggle.

Scarlett just chuckles, “Is that a bad thing?” she asks, grinning like a Cheshire cat. You grin mischievously, “It depends.” You say with a wink.

“So where does he want to take me for a first date?” you ask with a raised eyebrow.

Both Aiden and Scarlett grin, “We’re not allowed to tell you. It’s supposed to be a surprise.” They tell you.

You roll your eyes. “Well I guess I had better find a place to have this taken in then, so it is ready whenever he decides to ask me on said date.” You tell them.

They both giggle. “Graham said he’ll take you to have it fitted properly closer to the date. For now, though you should hang it up, so it doesn’t crease, Har.” Scarlett tells you as she pulls it out of the box again. She holds it up to you and grins picturing it on you with the corset. Nodding, she walks into your closet and hangs it up on one of the velvet lined hangers.

“So now what are you going to do?” Aiden asks.

“I think I’ll sit down and figure out my finances now. I have a tentative schedule worked out with Todd, so I can figure out approximately how much take home pay I will be getting each month. He is paying me more than what I had expected, so we’ll see how things turn out.” You tell him.

“Ok, well we were gonna go out for a bit. Are you going to be all right here by yourself?” they ask.

You nod. “Yeah, just make sure you lock the door when you leave.” You tell them.

They nod, “Okay, Harley. Call if you need anything or a ride anywhere.” Aiden tells you.

Then they head out.

You dig around in your stuff till you have all your bills and a notebook. Sitting everything down on the kitchen counter, you sit on the bar stool and start writing down all your bills:

·       Electricity

·       Phone

·       Internet

·       Spotify

·       Hulu

·       Netflix

·       Renter’s insurance

·       Health insurance

·       Hospital bills

·       Clinic bills

·       Food, toiletries

You call the electricity company and ask them to disconnect the power to your old apartment tomorrow morning because you are moving out. You pay the bill and thank them.

Next you look up how much food a dog eats per month. You write it down and then look up how much it will cost for that much dog food each month. You add it to the list of bills. Then you look up costs for stuff like flea and tick meds, heartworm meds, and pet grooming. You add that all to the list as well.

Finally, you factor in the rent for the new place.

It will be tight for a few months, but you think you can swing it on your own if your friends who promised to help with the start up costs for the dog follow through with their promise.

You search online for what breeds of dogs make good guard dogs and look at the pictures.

You like the Akitas, Belgian Malinois, Belgian Sheepdogs, Belgian Tervuren, German Shepherds, and Siberian Huskies.

You text Todd that you would like the apartment, and that you’re meeting Alex at the precinct at 1pm. You tell him you could meet him after that. He tells you he will call the O’Malleys and set up a time with them then call you back.

After talking with Todd, you hang up and then text Richard.

“Um, hi, it’s me, Harley. Would I be able to get a ride to the precinct that Alex works at for 1pm so I can give him my keys? Scarlett and Aiden are out for a bit and I don’t want to bother them. If you can’t that’s ok. I will call a taxi. Let me know.”

He calls you back a minute later and tells you he can give you a ride. You tell him you’re at Aiden’s apartment and he can pick you up there. “Would you want to give me a ride to my new apartment so I can sign the lease too?” you ask shyly.

“Sweetheart, for you, I’d move heaven and earth to help you however you need.” He tells you. You giggle. “Thanks, Rich.” You tell him.

“Let me finish what I’m workin’ on here, and I will be over in about 20 minutes.” He tells you. You thank him again and the two of you hang up.

You text Alex and ask for the address of the Precinct and ask if it is ok if you bring your new boyfriend with. He texts you back “Here’s the address. (insert precinct address). And do I need to run a background check on the guy? 😉 J/k.”

Chuckling, you text back, “Well, It’s Richard Armitage, so I think I’ll be safe with him. 😉 but don’t tell anyone. He likes his privacy and he just asked me to be his girl this morning after he finally worked up the nerve. ***giggles***.”

“Congrats!” he texts back. “I love his acting!” he tells you. “See you two at the precinct. You’re secret is safe with me!” he tells you.

“Thanks Alex. By the way, I’m heading over to sign the lease with the O’Malleys when I get done at the precinct! 😊” you text him.

“Great! Do you just want us to bring your stuff there?” he asks.

“Can we put it in storage till my day off?” you ask. “I’m still trying to get some stuff worked out here on my end.” You ask.

“Sure thing, Harley. Just let us know when you want it moved and the guys said they’ll come move it in for you on their day off.” He texts back.

“ok. Thanks!” you reply.

You are feeling more optimistic now and decide to go to your room and put some makeup on. You do so and add your ylang ylang perfume oil on your neck by your ears and a drop on your wrists. You grin and look at yourself in the mirror. You really like the corset that Graham bought for you and suspect Scarlett helped him pick it out since she knows your sizes.

You get a text a few minutes later that Richard is on his way.

Wandering into the closet, you try to decide which boots you want to wear. You decide to put the knee-high heels on so you’re a little taller standing next to Richard. You wonder if he will like how you look today.

You pick out the high-low jacket with the purple lining once you check the weather on your phone. You don’t want to be caught in the rain, and the app says it’s supposed to be a sunny and nice day, so you pick the high-low jacket.

Digging around in the closet, you find your black messenger bag and transfer your phone charging cords, speakers, phone, wallet and earbuds into it. You take your pouch that you had tied to your corset the other night and put it into the messenger bag as well.

You put your brush, comb, some hair ties and hairpins and your perfume oil into a little container and put it in your bag as well. You make a mental note to get a travel toothbrush, deodorant, container for your hair oil, and travel comb and brush set to keep with you in case you are kidnapped by your friends again and end up stuck at someone’s house overnight.

You chuckle and walk into the living room with your bag and coat just as you hear the doorbell ring. Walking over to the door, you open it and find Richard standing there with a bouquet of flowers. He sees you and gives you a big smile. “Hey, Love, you look amazing this morning!” he tells you as you take the flowers and give him a kiss.”

He follows you into the kitchen and you dig around for a vase or something to put the flowers in. Richard chuckles and opens up a cabinet on the top side of the fridge that you couldn’t reach and finds a vase for you. “Here, Love.” He tells you as he hands it to you.

Thanking him, you fill it with water and dump the powder packet of plant food in and then cut the flower stems and place them in the vase. “They smell amazing, Richard, thank you!”

You place the flowers on the counter and then notice he has a card for you. He hands it to you, and you read it. You look up at him and try not to cry. “Rich, you’re gonna make me cry and ruin my makeup!” you tell him. He chuckles and says, “Well, it’s a good thing we haven’t left yet then!” he says as he cups your face and gives you a searing kiss.

He pulls you into his arms, holding you close as he kisses you. When you both finally come up for air, he chuckles and tells you he is so happy you agreed to date him and be his girl. He asks you if you got your finances figured out and you nod. You show him your paper and the notes.

He frowns. “It’s gonna be really tight for you, Hun.” He says a little worried. “You sure you want to go this route? My offer still stands.” He says.

“I know, Rich.” You tell him as you snuggle into his arms. “But I’ve lived with someone or another ever since my parents died. I’ve never had a place that is just my own. It is something I need to try once at least. If I need help with bills, I promise I will let someone know.” You tell him.

He hugs you and sighs. “All right, Sweetheart. Now where is this precinct I need to get you to by 1pm?” he asks. You give him the address and he puts it into his phone’s navigation. “Oh! That won’t be too far from here. We have some time yet. Want to go get some lunch?” he asks.

You nod. “Oh, wait, I gotta go get something out of my backpack! I almost forgot about it!” you tell him as you run to your room. You dig in your bag and look for the restraining order. You momentarily panic when you can’t find it, but then check your jacket you wore yesterday and find it in the pocket. You grab the change you forgot to give to Todd as well.

You put the restraining order in your messenger bag’s front pocket and tell Rich it’s there in case anything happens to you. Then you grab a baggie and put Todd’s change from lunch yesterday in it and toss it in the messenger bag as well.

Your phone starts to ring, and you pick it up. You see it’s Todd and he tells you to meet him at the apartment for 2pm. He asks if you need a ride and you tell him, no, you will get a ride there. “I’ll text you the address, so you have it.” He tells you. You thank him and hang up. A moment later you receive the text with the address, and forward it to Richard with a note, “Here is my new address. 😊”

Rich looks down at the text and chuckles. He helps you into your jacket and you sling the messenger bag across your body. “Ready!” you say and give him a hug, pulling him down for a kiss. “Someone’s in a good mood today!” he chuckles. “Mmmmm, you smell divine, Sweetheart! I might have to just kiss you here all day.” He teases.

You chuckle and he nibbles your neck as he backs you to the door casing. You giggle and manage to squeak out, “Rich, we need to go get lunch!”

He looks up from nuzzling your neck and gives you a mischievous look. “I have my lunch right here.” He says and gives you a little squeeze. You squeak and he chuckles.

“Ok, ok. We’ll go get you some food.” He says in a mock offended tone, making you giggle and give him the stink eye.

“Be good or you won’t get your surprise.” You tell him. He raises an eyebrow. You just grin and head for the door. He follows and you both slip out into the hallway. You lock the door and text Scarlet where you’re going, and that Rich is taking you to run some errands.

She replies, “Okay, have fun! 😉”

The two of you walk down to the elevator and wait for it after you push the down button. Rich grabs your hand and intertwines his fingers with yours and kisses the back of your hand.

“Would you like to go look at some potential dogs with me and Graham when we get done with your apartment stuff?” he asks. “I saw you had made a list of some you liked.”

You nod. “Sure, if we have time.” You tell him. He grins and nods. The elevator arrives and whisks you both down to the ground floor and Richard escorts you out to his BMW and the two of you take off.

“Where do you want to go eat at, Love?” he asks. You think for a bit, then grin. “How about we get a pizza, and a bottle of wine and have a picnic by the lake?” you ask.

He looks at you surprised, and you grin. “All right, Love, whatever makes you happy.” He tells you with a chuckle. You look at him for a moment, what would you pick if it was up to you?” you ask, curious.

He grins and says, “That will be a surprise. For now, we’ll get you your pizza and wine.” He smirks.

You raise your eyebrow, but don’t question him further. You look out at the passing scenery and sigh contentedly. He glances over at you then back to the road. He gives your hand a squeeze. “You all right, Love?” he asks after a little bit.

You nod. “I’m just curious. It seems like Graham was having fun playing matchmaker.” You reply as you look over at Richard. He keeps a straight face, despite knowing he asked Graham to do so after hearing him rant about you all afternoon and especially after meeting you at the bar. “Is that so?” he asks. “What makes you say that?” he asks with a raised eyebrow.

“He just encourages me a lot when we talk, and he is always talking about you and how you’d take care of me and would be a great boyfriend for me.” You tell him. “I think he and Scarlett planned to kidnap me after work yesterday so I would have to come to the party. There is no way he could’ve gotten from your place to the studio in the amount of time that lapsed between me texting Scarlett and me arriving.

He was already in the car, and it was parked on the side of the street when I got there with Todd after looking at the apartment. The engine on Graham’s jaguar was cold, so he had been there long enough that the hood was cool to the touch.

Now that I think of it, he had been into my work earlier yesterday afternoon and we had to shoo him out along with a bunch of other guests when we closed.” You tell him as you put your free hand to your chin and rub it, thinking.

Richard glances at you and you see a surprised look on his face.

You grin. “I think he knew about your party and planned to ‘conveniently’ be nearby to pick me up and used Aiden’s tendency to get hammered as an excuse. I suppose Scarlett texted him where to pick me up and he just went there, parked and read his book till I showed up.” You say.

Richard struggled to keep a straight face, annoyed that you figured out their plot to get you to the party so quickly.

“Is that so?” he replies. “Well, Graham likes you, sweetheart. It wouldn’t surprise me if he had fun meddling like that. He kind of thinks of you as his kid, you know.” He tells you.

You look at Richard in disbelief. “What?”

He grins seeing you thrown off track. “Yup. Scarlett told him you didn’t have any family left so I guess he took it upon himself to take you under his wing and be a father figure.” He chuckles. “He even gave me ‘the talk’ and told me that if I screwed up enough courage to ask you out, that I better be good to you or he’d beat my head in.” Richard chuckles.

You put your head in your hand and groan, making Richard laugh. “Don’t worry, Sweetheart, he is thoroughly enjoying it. He doesn’t get to see his girls very often cuz of his acting. So, let him have his fun. I don’t mind.” Rich tells you.

“All right.” You say as Richard pulls into a pizza place and the two of you get out of his car. You both head into the pizza place and order a medium pepperoni pizza. They tell you it will be ready in about 15 minutes.

Richard asks if there’s a liquor store anywhere nearby and they tell you there’s one a block away. He asks if you want to wait here for the pizza or come with him. You opt to join him, and you pay for the pizza and then tell them you’ll be back in 15 minutes.

Rich ushers you to the car and opens the door for you. You get in and the two of you head for the liquor store. You think about getting wine, then realize that you’re meeting with cops afterward. You mention it to Rich and say, “Maybe we better do something that is not alcoholic this time since we will be meeting with cops and a retired officer and detective.” You suggest. He pulls over and parks on the side of the road.

He smirks and nods. “Yeah, that’s a good idea, now that you mention it. What did you have in mind then?” he asks.

“What kind of pop do you like? I don’t have pop often, but I’d be okay with pop this time.” You tell him.

Chuckling, he says, “I’ll drink almost any pop, sweetheart.”

You grin. “Rootbeer it is then!” and he grins and rolls his eyes. He leans over the center console and grabs your face and kisses you. “You’re just so cute.” He tells you with laughing eyes.

You give him a beaming smile and tell him, “You’re cute too! Sweet cheeks.” You smirk.

You see his ears get pink and he grins and kisses you again. The two of you spend your 15 minute wait for the pizza in the car, kissing and talking. Then he drives back to the pizza shop and you run in while he waits and you grab the pizza, plates, napkins, and buy two 20oz bottles of root beer and head back to the car.

You hand the pizza to him and put the bag with the rest of the stuff on the floor by your feet, and then buckle up. He hands you the pizza back and he pulls out of the parking lot and heads for the lake. The two of you find a nice spot with a picnic table and sit down to eat.

It’s a beautiful day and the two of you have a fun time. Some ducks come over and you toss them the inside part of the crust from your pizza and they happily eat it. Richard takes a couple pictures of you feeding the ducks out of your hand and then the two of you pack up and head back to the car.

He leans against it and pulls you in for a kiss. “That was fun, Sweetheart. We should do this again sometime.” He tells you. You nod.

“Ready to head out?” he asks, as he looks at his watch.

“Yup.” You reply.

He stands up and opens the door for you and helps you in, then closes the door and gets in on his side.

The two of you head over to the precinct and arrive a little before 1pm.

@dondarrion16 @criminally-supernatural @hilary456 @fizzyxcustard @thetherianthropydaily @ratv0miit @emrfangirl @midnight-reader-morning-sleeper

[coffee-obsessed-writer]

The Devil in Disguise, Pt. 3

Dean Winchester x Reader

Masterlist

Summary: Dean’s on the run from escaping a prison where a job went south. Sam is in the wind. With nowhere to go and an injured leg, Dean takes refuge in the only place he could find—an old remote cabin. Normally empty for long stretches, Dean happens to stumble in the same day that the cabin’s owner returns. After a rocky first encounter, Dean comes to believe that a distant connection they share could be the thing that saves his life and gets him back to Sam. But will it happen before Y/N’s finance, a prison guard at Green River, finds the secret she’s hiding in the woods?

A/N: The fic was inspired by the song “The Devil’s Backbone” by The Civil Wars. This is part 3 of 5 written for multiple bingo cards that go for both chapters. Set around S2 (Folson Prison Blues). New tag lists are at the end of the fic. I have tag spots open, let me know if you want to jump on or off for SPN (Dean and/or Sam, or RPF for Jensen)

Warnings: (Part Three): Language, Mild angst, Hints of abuse, Drinking, Smut (18+ only)

WC: 5.7K

*Banner created by me. I do not own any of these pictures.

Dean didn’t say much to her for the next couple of hours. After [Y/N] helped set him up in the bathroom so he could take a makeshift shower, he made his way to the kitchen without any assistance, albeit very slow. She tried to help him hobble his way along, but he insisted on doing it himself. Once he was clean and his wound was tended to, she placed down a big bowl of chili and a hunk of cornbread, warmed and oozing with butter. He thanked her and as the fragrant spices filled his nose, his stomach rumbled fiercely. Dean dove in and greedily ate every bite until the bottom of the bowl was so clean it was hard to imagine there was much in it, to begin with.

“I guess it was good?” she asked with a half-amused grin. 

Dean leaned back in the chair and groaned along with the wood. He smiled, satisfied, and patted his stomach. “So good. I feel like I haven’t eaten real food in, well, forever.”

“Can’t imagine your meals at Green River were exactly gourmet. Then, living on soup and protein bars the last couple of days couldn’t have done much for your taste buds…” she trailed off and shrugged, rising from the table and clearing his dish. 

She seemed different, like something in her was changed by the earlier encounter. Despite their close moment after Derek left, Dean felt like she was holding something back; maybe it was the need to cry or just the urge to rage, but even he could feel the shift in her mood without her saying a word about it. 

He sat quietly and watched her move around the kitchen, cleaning dishes, putting away the rest of the food. Silently going about her business, and yet, he could almost see the wheels in her head-turning. His own thoughts kept going to what he overheard while in the closet, but also, to the closet itself. A lock on the outside, sure, why not… but one on the inside could only mean trouble. But, was it trouble for [Y/N] or someone else? Unable to keep his thoughts to himself, Dean leaned forward on the table but didn’t look in her direction at first. “Can I ask you something? And, I don’t mean to pry, but... my curiosity is piqued.”

She stood at the sink, and just when he thought she wouldn’t say anything, [Y/N] turned around and he could already see she knew the questions he wanted to ask. She still didn’t speak, just used her expression to grant permission for him to ask.

“Alright…” he started then turned in the chair and did his best to stand with a bit of weight on his injured leg. He didn’t wobble this time, though held onto the table for support and now that he was secure, his gaze focused on her. “Why is there a lock on the inside of a closet door in your bathroom? What were you trying to hide from?”

[Y/N]’s gaze fell to the old hardwood floor, but that half-amused smile stayed on her lips as she considered her answer. Finally, when she lifted her (y/c) eyes, Dean saw years’ worth of pain and heartache in them. It didn’t make him sad for her, but instead anger at the people who were the cause of it. 

“My father used to hit my mom. She put it in there one day when he wasn’t around so I could have a place to hide if I needed it.” Her reply was so matter-of-fact and calm, that Dean had to take a moment to process what she actually said. 

“He what?” he asked through gritted teeth.

“He hit her, a lot. We lived here for a few years when I was very little. He had been asked to leave his prior parish, so my mom fixed this place up for us to live in until he found a new one. It was her grandfather’s cabin. So, she loved the place and was thrilled to live here for a while.”

“Guessing your dad didn’t care for it,” Dean spat, the words leaving a bad taste in his mouth just as the impression of her father did.

“Nope. Not even a little. He drank, got violent, took all his frustrations out on her. You know how it goes. Eventually, the offer from Green River Baptist came through and here we are. We moved out of here and down into the house adjacent to the church, and she installed one there, too.”

“Did he ever hurt you?” Dean’s question had more of a punch than he intended, which didn’t go unnoticed by her. 

“No. Well, once, but not like he hurt my mother. Once we were moved into the new church, his outrages stopped for the most part. ”

Dean shook his head and inhaled slowly, trying to still the rage he felt towards her father. “Your mom… where is she now?”

“Residing in Green Valley cemetery. Remember I said I had family there?”

“Oh,” Dean replied awkwardly and shifted weight off his bad leg, “yeah…”

“Here, come on,” [Y/N] said, and quickly dried her hands on a dishtowel before moving to help Dean. “Come sit in the living room. There’s a fire going and then I’ll put the kettle on for hot chocolate.”

“Got any booze to throw in there?” Dean asked hopefully.

“I do, but you can’t have any. Not while on those meds. I need you clear-headed as you can be.”

Dean sighed heavily. “Awesome, thanks Nurse Ratchett.”

“Yeah well, you’ll be thanking me should Derek show up again. Cause I guarantee the next time he does, he’ll have a shotgun in hand.”

“Peachy,” he mused and rolled his eyes as he slung an arm around her shoulder as she helped him walk into the living room. 

Once in the living room, she let him go so he could sit on the couch then turned to tend to the fire. That was when he really watched her closely; from the glow of the flames against her face, tracing the lines and curves of her body, right on down her tight jeans to her wool-socked feet. He was so curious about so many things--including how she would look sans the layers of the thermal and flannel she wore--but had no idea whether he should or could even bring himself to ask. She was a stranger to him, but yet, he felt close to her in a way that even surprised him. 

Dean watched every move she made and studied her face as she seemed to be lost in the dancing flames. When she snapped out of it and turned back to him, he didn’t try to look away or pretend he hadn’t been watching her. 

“What?” she asked nervously, “why are you staring at me?”

“Just watching you work the fire,” he replied casually, though they both knew it was much more than that. 

“Ok, weirdo,” she snarked and turned to go into the kitchen. 

“So, can I ask you something else?” Dean called out to her, and when she didn’t respond, he twisted his torso to see her moving about the kitchen. 

She just finished filling the kettle and gently rested it on one of the burners then turned it on. “Ask me whatever you want, Dean. I have no secrets.”

“You got me,” he replied, his wide, toothy grin made her chuckle.

“Other than you… what do you want to know?”

“What the HELL are you doing with that guy?” 

“Derek?”

“Yeah, Derek. Derek is a douchebag.”

“Well aware, thanks.” She continued on making the hot chocolate, and when she retrieved the bottle of rum from the pantry, Dean couldn’t help but smile when he saw her pour a small shot into each mug. 

She was quiet for a while, long enough that the kettle began to whistle and he assumed it was her way of avoiding the question. Dean wouldn’t push her, not when she was doing all she was for him, but he couldn’t take his focus, or his eyes, from her. Nor could he understand how such a beautiful woman, with skills and balls of steel like her, would stay with an overbearing shithead like Derek and that being based on only hearing a few minutes of their lives together. 

[Y/N] came back into the living room a minute later with two steaming mugs that smelled heavenly of chocolate and liquor. 

“If you end up having a reaction to your meds with that shot of rum, it’s your own damn fault,” she said and handed him a mug before sitting on the opposite end of the couch, one leg tucked beneath her. 

Dean smiled smugly and sipped at the piping hot liquid. “I’ll take my chances, thanks.”

She stared into the fire for a beat, and when she finally turned back to him, he realized that she wasn’t just being quiet, she was thinking; most likely trying to phrase her answer to his question.

“I met Derek in high school. My mom had died by then, the incident in the church with Deacon had happened, and I was a wild kid. Summer before sophomore year, I met Derek at church. His family just moved here and my dad set me up on a date with him… a good Christian boy.”

“Oh, I bet that date was gads of fun,” Dean mocked and licked the chocolate from his lips. 

“It was, actually. Derek wasn’t as good of a Christian boy as he pretended to be. We went out drinking at the pits in the woods, and had a great time.”

Dean raised his brow in surprise. “I certainly didn’t expect that answer.”

[Y/N] chuckled but it was flat and sad. “It didn’t last. We dated for two years, and by the time we were about to be seniors, in his head, my father already had us walking down the aisle. The second I graduated, he wanted to marry me off and get rid of me. By then, Derek wasn’t exactly the guy I thought he was and I was so ready for it to be over.”

“So, why are you still with him all these years later?”

She shrugged. “When you are mentally beat down and told you’ll never do better than what you got after so long you start to believe it.”

Dean swallowed hard and felt his teeth grind together in an attempt to bite back words he had no business saying to her. As they sat there in the heavy silence following her words, he was seething in anger that anyone could think of her as anything but wonderful.

“That’s horse shit, you know,” he said softly, raking his teeth over his bottom lip in frustration. 

“Yeah, well… tell that to eighteen year old me who was getting kicked out of her house and forced to live with a guy who I didn’t want to be with, or be homeless.”

“Well okay, but you're clearly not eighteen anymore. You work? Right? Have money… why stay?”

“It’s just not that simple Dean. I wish it were, but it's not. Besides, what do you care? In a few days or two, you’ll be able travel and I will somehow get you back to your brother. Speaking of… I guess we should talk about that. How do you wanna--”

“Don’t do that.”

“What?”

“Change the subject. I’m not letting this go, [Y/N]. That guy is a massive dick. I have known plenty of guys like that in my life. Bullies, all of ‘em. Chances are if he hasn’t raised a hand to you yet, he will.”

She raised her brows subtly and didn’t look him in the eyes. He knew what it meant, but didn’t want to press her. Truth was, he didn’t have any right to get into her business, but yet…

“[Y/N], I’m not trying to--”

“I know,” she interrupted, but it was quiet, almost a whisper. 

Dean moved closer to her, ignoring the burst of discomfort it caused in his leg. He left a bit of breathing room, but reached out and placed a hand on the bend of her knee. He waited a moment to see if she would recoil, or react negatively to his touch. She didn’t. 

“No, you don’t know,” he said. “I won’t tell you what to do, but sweetheart, you do not need that guy. Not for a damn thing.”

Her eyes slowly came up to meet his and he could see the conflict brewing in them. Despite the temperature, she gulped down the hot chocolate and placed her mug on the small table beside her. Without saying anything, she got up, Dean’s hand falling back to the couch, and went into the kitchen only to return a moment later with the bottle of rum. She sat down in the same position, only much closer to Dean; close enough that her knee was gently pressing against the side of his thigh.

[Y/N] took a quick pull of the brown liquor and winced as it trickled down her throat. She passed the bottle to Dean, who looked between it and her with uncertainty.

“My very beautiful nurse said it would screw with my meds,” he shrugged, flashed her his most charming smile. 

“She’s an idiot. Get drunk with me, wouldya? Cause honestly, after these last few days I could use it.”

Dean placed his mug of hot chocolate down on the other table and took the bottle from her. The taste of the rum was like heaven on his tongue, but he knew he had to pace himself. She wasn’t wrong about keeping a level, clear head, yet the allure of getting drunk with her was something he didn’t want to pass up, either. After spending the last few days down with an infection and fever, Dean knew he couldn’t be too carefree with his actions. 

Passing the bottle back to her, she took a shot from it, her (y/c) eyes intently watching him. “I don’t want to talk about Derek. Tell me a story, Dean. Tell me about what you and your brother do. What other creatures or monsters have you killed?”

Dean scoffed and stammered a moment before he could formulate an answer. “I--Well… why? Why would you want to hear those stories?”

“Because,” she shrugged and drank from the bottle again before passing it to him, “at least what you’re doing seems important… meaningful. Me… I am a bored soon-to-be housewife who likes to pretend I write important things when really it’s just a bunch of bullshit.”

“I doubt that,” he replied, keeping his green eyes locked with hers as he raised the bottle to his lips. He was feeling the effects of the alcohol quickly; could feel it coursing through his veins and an overwhelming need to touch her rose with it.

“Just tell me a story,” she laughed, “I don’t want to think… I want you to distract me, please?”

“Alright,” Dean nodded and gave her back the bottle. She took a healthy pull from it, placed the cap back on and reached over to leave the bottle on the floor beside the couch. The fire crackled and popped in the background while Dean tried to think of a case to tell her about; one that wouldn’t be too dark or heavy, but he was struggling because they all were like that. She thought what he and Sam did was important, and maybe it was, but it certainly came with a hefty price.

“This one time Sam and I had to join a traveling circus,” he shrugged and felt his heart warm as she broke into a disbelieving smile.

“Seriously? What was going on there?”

“A killer clown, or so we thought. Thanks to a little help from a friend, we found out it wasn’t so much a clown but a rakshasa--”

“A what?!” she snorted, the alcohol clearly affecting her as well as she tried, and failed, to repeat the word. “A rakssha--rakeis--a what?!”

“A rakshasa… a spirit, shapeshifter of sorts that likes to feed on humans. This one had set up shop in a traveling carnival. Passed itself off as a clown, got kids to let it in the house and then would eat one of their parents.”

“Oh,” [Y/N] said, wrinkling her nose in disgust, “gross.”

“Yeah, very,” Dean chuckled, his tongue darting across his lips while looking at her. It was an involuntary response, but he could see her watching him closely now, too, and he didn’t hate it.

“What else, tell me more,” she requested and leaned forward enough that he could see a spark of life returning to her eyes. 

Dean recounted a few other cases he and Sam had worked over the years, keeping them short and sweet, and mostly ones where there was a happy ending. He left out the demon stories or the time when Sam had to put down a woman after he’d fallen for her because she had been bitten and turned into a werewolf. He went more in-depth about the case they worked for Deacon, too, and other times he’d been in their lives. [Y/N] listened attentively, her eyes never leaving his face and the more he talked, the closer she got. 

What felt like hours later, she moved off the couch and once again tended to the fire. From the corner of the room, the CB radio crackled to life again, making both Dean and [Y/N] freeze, then catch the other’s nervous gaze. They waited silently through the unintelligible voice mixed with static, waiting to see if one would make sense; if Dean’s name was the topic of the call or if--

“[Y/N].... you…*static* ...up. Now! Over.”

Dean saw her face fall the minute the voice was clear enough to understand. Her whole body stiffened, a coating of fear mixed with anger taking hold of her expressions and forcing her to walk towards the CB. He realized as she got closer that she still had the fireplace poker in her hand. Even from across the room Dean could see how tightly she was gripping the iron weapon, her knuckles turning a ghostly shade of white.

[Y/N]’s free hand darted out and snatched the handle from its base and gave a quick look over her shoulder. Dean nodded, his way of agreeing to be quiet. She drew in a deep breath and pressed the button. 

“I’m here. Over.”

It took a minute, but the voice came back clearer this time. “What the hell you thinkin’, girl? You better get your ass back to town... *more static* ...ing. Storm’s …. *static* ...for days! Over.”

There was another moment of hesitation on her part before she pressed the button and spoke again. “I’m not a God-damned child. I’ll tell you what I told Derek. I’m fine. I will be back when I am back. Over and out.”

Without hesitation, she turned off the power to the radio and gently placed the handle back in its cradle. [Y/N] stood motionless, still holding the poker with a fierce grip as if she couldn’t decide whether she wanted to use it or not. She finally moved, turned back around to face him and that’s when she noticed the poker in hand. Paying it an absent glance, she gently laid it back on the rack and shook the haunted thoughts from her mind. 

“I don’t wanna tell you what to do, but maybe turning that off isn’t a great idea,” Dean suggested carefully. “It’s kind of our early warning system, you know?”

“You’re right,” she replied, and went back to the radio to switch it back on, then maneuvered a few of the controls so music began to play through the small speaker on the unit. “There, at least that’s better to listen too. And it’ll flash when something’s trying to get through.”

“Who was that?” Dean asked, unable to quell his curiosity. 

“My father. Derek probably left here and went straight there. They’re always conspiring something,” she muttered.

Dean nodded and tried to think of something he could say that would change the sudden change in her demeanor. Seeing how her father’s voice alone affected her, made him just as disgusted as he had been when he saw how Derek’s presence changed her. [Y/N] was a special kind of woman, how she was so mistreated by the men in her life left him baffled and angry.

Before he could think of something to say, she spoke up first as she knelt down by Dean’s injured leg.  “I should check your wound…” 

“You’re just surrounded by douchebags, huh?”

“You don’t know the half of it,” she replied and began to pull up the bottom of the sweatpants when he leaned forward and put his hand on her shoulder. 

“My leg is fine,” he said. “I mean, if you’re just looking for a way to get me to take my pants off, I can think of better ways, sweetheart.” He knew he was being blunt, and while he certainly wouldn’t turn down the mysterious beauty, he was only trying to get her back in that light-hearted, easy-going way she was before the CB had gone off. 

[Y/N] laughed but then caught his gaze, and in it, he saw that maybe his comment wasn’t as laughable to her. 

“Is that so?” she asked and stopped pulling up his pant leg, but didn’t remove her hand from his ankle. He could feel her feather-light touch on his skin and desperately wanted her to touch him everywhere. “And just what way would that be?”

Dean chuckled and needed to decide how far he could, or should try to take this. He was injured, after all, and she was a stranger with two very aggressive men in her life. Getting involved with her in any way was only going to mean trouble. But then she looked at him, challenging his comment with nothing but the tick of her brow and the pout of her lip; subtle, but sexy. He knew there was only one way it could go.

“Well, you could come back up on the couch and let me show you…”

Dean’s heart was pounding, unsure of how she would react. When [Y/N] slowly rose from the floor and stood before him, he sat up straighter on the couch silently praying she would take him up on his offer. Everything in the room seemed to shift at once; the fire popped and hissed as it caught a new log ablaze, the song on the radio ended, the first few notes of Unchained Melody started on some distant AM station, and [Y/N] was slowly removing the flannel she wore over her thermal shirt, and tossing it to where she had been sitting on the couch. 

“You shouldn’t say things like that if you don’t mean it,” she whispered, her expression unreadable, but intense. 

Dean reached out for her hands, pressed his palms into hers, then laced their fingers together before gingerly pulling her forward and gauging her resistance. When she didn’t fight him at all, he continued guiding her closer which forced her to straddle his lap, or she’d fall on top of him. She did so without any hesitation, but hovered over his lap and kept her eyes locked with his. He wished he could read her, get a feel for what exactly she was thinking. Though he had been with plenty of women over the years, she made him nervous; more surprising than that was that he liked it.

“Who says I don’t mean it?” he breathed, more taken with her with every inch closer she came. “If you’re uncomfortable, or you want to--”

“Shut up,” she huffed and leaned into him, her lips pressing to his while his hands released hers and immediately went to her ribs, sliding down to her hips and holding onto her tightly. 

Her lips were soft and sweet and heavily laced with the taste of rum. She kissed him with a tempered need; he could feel her wanting more, just as he did. Yet there was still a hesitancy to how she pressed her mouth to his. Wanting her to feel comfortable, he let her set the pace and happily followed with every step further she took it. [Y/N] sank down lower on his lap, her hands sliding up his chest, towards his neck; her fingers locking together behind it as her thumbs gently rubbed against the sensitive spot behind his ears. 

Dean moaned softly into her kiss and wrapped his arms around her back, slowly lifting the back of her shirt and lacing his fingers together against her skin. She parted his lips with her tongue, her need beginning to overcome the shyness of their first encounter. [Y/N] didn’t stop Dean when his hands moved up her back and unclasped her bra; she didn’t protest when he began to lift the thermal shirt up just enough for him to feel the bottom curves of her breasts. Through all this, she only kissed him deeper. For as much as he wanted her, and as much as he would hate himself should this derail their momentum, Dean pulled back from her suddenly. 

[Y/N] was surprised, her breath coming in short spurts, her hands still clinging to his neck. 

“What? What’s wrong?” she asked, desperately searching his face for a reason. “Is it your leg? Are you in pain? Is it me?”

“No! No, absolutely not… you… you are…” Dean exhaled heavily and licked his bottom lip as his fingers kneaded into her skin and his dark, lustful eyes drank her in, “... you’re perfect. It’s just that, you don’t know me, not really. This… this can stop if you want, I don’t want you to blow up your whole life because of one night.”

“Dean, if I am going to implode my life, I can’t imagine anyone else I would want to do it with. Besides, how is this any different from if we’d met in a bar and had a one night stand? Hm?”

Dean considered her answer and shrugged. “I guess it’s not.”

“It’s not. And right now, I don’t care about anything outside those doors. I just want to feel good. Can you make me feel good?” she whined softly.

“I think I can help you out there,” he smirked, his tongue again running along his bottom lip as he sized her up and imagined the things they could really do if not for his bum leg. “But, huh, I’m not playing at full capacity here, so…” he trailed off with another shrug, but she didn’t miss a beat. 

“Well then I guess it’s up to me then, isn’t it?” she breathed and leaned in to kiss him again. 

Within a minute, Dean pulled off her thermal and her bra with it, her chest bare and glowing in the light of the fire. He trailed his mouth in soft, lingering kisses across her neck and down to her chest, while his hands traced the lines of her skin delicately. He could feel himself getting harder as she moved in the slightest bit against his lap. By the time his mouth had found her nipples and her hands were pressing his face into her chest, he was fully erect and desperate to feel more of her.

[Y/N] must have felt the same because her hands unlocked from his neck and roughly ran down the length of his torso, coming together between her legs, and palming his erection through the thin layer of cotton sweatpants. The moment he felt the pressure of her hand against his dick he inhaled sharply and growled low, relishing in her touch. They continued that way for a minute, kissing and touching and rubbing and grinding deeper, until [Y/N] couldn’t take it anymore. 

She suddenly rose from his lap, quickly unbuttoned her jeans and took them off, tossing them aside with the rest of her clothes. She stood in front of him, slotted perfectly between his knees in only her pink cotton panties. [Y/N] slowly knelt in front of him and ran a finger along the waistband of his pants, carefully peeling them back over his engorged member. She took him in one hand, the flesh on flesh contact causing him to exhale slowly. It was when she brought her mouth to his dick, and lightly kissed the tip did he close his eyes and roll his head back against the couch. Letting her tongue linger on along the shaft, she licked down to his balls before lifting her head and gently removing his pants all the way; taking special care around his wound.

[Y/N] again stood in front of him, but Dean couldn’t wait for her to resume her place on his lap. He gripped his dick and began to massage himself as she watched, and the way she watched made him want her even more. Just as she removed the last piece of clothes, he sat up and with his other hand reached out for her. Neither of them spoke, as he once again guided her on his lap and as she hovered over him, he dragged the tip of his cock through her warm, wet folds and felt himself go weak at the sensation. 

Her breathing became shaky as he continued to pushing and pull himself through her sex, brushing her clit delicately at first. But after a few times, even he couldn’t take the teasing anymore. 

[Y/N] bent her head down into his neck, her teeth nipping at the lobe of his ear as she begged him in a needy whisper, “Please, Dean… don’t make me wait another second.”

He complied, gladly. Dean let go of himself, and grabbed her hips, rocking her in a way that he could slip into her and filled her with the first thrust upwards. She cried out, but not in pain. It was as if the instant euphoric feeling of him inside her needed to be released so she could concentrate on the rush that followed. 

Dean rocked her slowly on his lap, while his mouth toyed with each of her nipples, taking turns lavishing each with attention. His moans were muffled by her chest and he found himself completely lost in how good it felt to be inside her. Her hands were wrapped around him, her nails digging into his back, then his shoulders, pressing him as close to her as she could. Her hips moved in rhythm with his, as her mouth fell open and her eyes closed. 

The sounds of heavy breathing filled the room, muffling the Righteous Brothers pouring from the radio, and even drowning out the sound of the fire. 

“Fuck,” Dean grunted, his lips snarling into a smiling as she moved her body faster when he cursed. He used the pad of his thumb to rub her clit, the instant he touched her there, she whimpered, her whole body melting at his touch. 

“Oh… GOD… fuck, Dean! Feel so good…” she panted, her head rolling back then around so her chin fell to her chest. She was riding him with speed and purpose, the need to climax so great and so close she let go of him to grip the couch for better leverage.

“Damn, baby,” Dean mewed, unsure of how much longer he could go before he would cum. She felt so good on him, and even though that final push towards orgasm was downright euphoric, he didn’t want it to end yet. 

He finally released her clit and grabbed her hips tighter, pushing and pulling her into him as roughly as he could. One last time and he felt her walls flutter and spasming around his cock as her body began to tremble and his name didn’t just fall from her lips, but rang out like church bells, followed by a string of expletives that would easily get her sent to Hell. 

It was all he needed to cum, and though he tried to move her off him before he did, she finally resisted him, intent on taking his release inside her and crashing her lips to his as he did. 

Dean held onto her for dear life, his mouth falling away from hers as he buried his head between her breasts. She held him there and slowed her movements against him, finally coming to a stop and letting her body relax, but still not moving from his lap. He lifted his face to see her, she was sweaty and beautiful, her hair falling around his face, causing some of her features to linger in the shadows of it. He reached up and tucked a hair behind her ear. 

“Well? Feel better?”

[Y/N] absently licked her lips, then revealed and small, impish little grin. “Dunno… I think maybe we should go back to the bedroom and try again. Just so I know for sure…”

“Well I am absolutely good with that, but--”

“But, what?” she asked, an ounce of doubt moving into her eyes. 

“But, as much as I wanna be the romantic guy and carry you in there, I’m gonna need you to help me hobble that way. I do believe you just drained any strength I had left in my leg.”

“Oh,” she said and moved off him, clearly panicked. 

“No… sweetheart… I meant that in a really, really good way. Whatcha say you help me up and we take this back there,” he smirked and nodded towards the bedroom off the kitchen.

“Happily,” she grinned and moved off his lap. 

Standing in front of him, she held out her hand and helped him rise from the couch. The pain in his leg was noticeable, but not nearly as much as it had been before. She left her clothes behind and slung an arm around his waist as he slung his over her shoulder.

“Just one request,” she said as they made their way to the bedroom.

“Anything.”

“This needs to go,” she demanded, tugging at his shirt. “I want to feel all of you this time.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he complied and quickly discarded the shirt he’d been wearing, tossing it behind him, not caring where it landed. “For you sweetheart, anything.”

Everything Tags: @sorenmarie87 // @yallgotkik

SPN Tags: @kazosa // @wings-of-a-raven // @closetspngirl // @idreamofplaid// @screechingartisancashbailiff // @linki-locks11 // @winchesterxfamilybusiness// @spnhollis // @sandlee44 // @stoneyggirl // @clarinette07 // @negans-wife // @deans-baby-momma // @hobby27 // @breereadsthings // @katehuntington // @81mysteriouslyme // @mrswhozeewhatsis // @deathofmissjackson// @lauravic // @aomi-nabi // @akshi8278 // @whereismyangel-damnitdeanshare// @coffeebooksandfandom // @rebelminxy // @22sarah08 // @fictionalabyss// @adoptdontshoppets // @blackcherrywhiskey // @babypieandwhiskey // @maddiepants // @lefthologramdeer // @his-paradox // @unlikelygalaxygiver

[rosalind-of-arden]

Sword and Pen Reread, chapter 16

Time for things to get stabby! Long post. Some discussion of a canon torture incident (y’all know which one).

We left off last chapter with Dario making his dramatic entrance. We pick up here with Wolfe lecturing Jess, Morgan talking to Dario, and Glain sending Codex messages. Who is Glain messaging? Her squad? Santi? Khalila?

Jess admits he’s dying, and Wolfe shows a flash of emotion - Jess can’t tell if it’s anguish or anger. I think Wolfe is seeing himself in Jess here. Jess’s “Getting killed for something worthwhile is better than dying alone” echoes Wolfe’s death letter from Ash and Quill: “I hope I died for something, as I lived for it.” Wolfe in Smoke and Iron, too; he’s not afraid to go into the Colosseum and probably die fighting, but the thought of dying slowly and helplessly in prison terrifies him. He understands exactly what Jess is thinking, and that hurts.

Why did I go back and reread that whole letter? There’s something in my eye now.

Second page of the chapter, here’s Jess thinking that his friends have made him a better person, while his family’s influence makes him worse. His impulse to kill the Archivist comes from his family, and he expects his friends would disapprove. Interesting parallel with Dario later in the chapter.

Wolfe’s discomfort with violence again? He neither agrees nor disagrees with Jess’s argument about killing the Archivist. He just shakes his head and gets on with the scheming.

But this isn’t just a moral “is it ok to kill the Archivist” thing, necessarily. For Wolfe, especially, there might be a lot of vindication in seeing the Archivist formally and publicly accused and tried for his crimes. Obviously, he’s not going to admit that outright, but it could very well influence his stance on what to do with the Archivist (and co-conspirators).

And why isn’t Wolfe getting into this argument with Jess? He knows how much vengeance means to Jess. With Jess dying, Wolfe doesn’t want to have an argument that would hurt Jess unless it’s absolutely necessary. Wolfe might also know just how much of the “we need to kill the bastard” talk is emotion talking, too. After all, in the end, Jess is surprisingly compassionate toward the dying Archivist. And Jess wasn’t completely on board with assassination when Anit first brought it up earlier in the book, either. If anyone can recognize angry bluster, it would be Wolfe. Echoes there of Wolfe in Ash and Quill telling Jess how well he knows him.

Wolfe goes to talk to Glain and Dario (there’s the planning team), leaving Morgan with Jess. He’s giving those two a private moment - does he know they broke up? Probably not? But also, keeping his distance from Morgan after the energy draining incident?

Morgan and Jess, bonding over their mutual decisions to sacrifice themselves for the people and cause they care about.

Dario’s first response to being asked to lure the Archivist into a trap: “I’ve had enough of intrigue.” He’s still deeply hurt by the betrayal. He doesn’t want to do anything like that again. But here’s Glain trying to talk him into it. What message is Dario getting here? That his friends need him to be a bad person. Ouch. Guess what this pushes Dario toward?

Lose Wolfe’s trust, never get it back. He immediately and aggressively rejects the idea of working with Callum because he expects Callum to betray them. Very similar to his reaction to trusting Zara again in Ash and Quill.

Dad Wolfe holds Jess up when Jess just about collapses coughing. Wolfe’s hands are shaking while he holds Jess, which is interesting, since that’s always been a PTSD thing for Wolfe up until now.

Wolfe very much wants to be there to catch the Archivist.

Dad Wolfe, quietly checking in with Jess: “He glanced at Jess, just briefly, but Jess understood that to mean something.” This is a nice moment of understanding between these two. There’s the nonverbal communication, which itself shows how well they understand each other. But then there’s Wolfe, knowing very well that Jess might not want his vulnerability openly acknowledged, keeping this little check-in quiet. Jess does choose to explain, but Wolfe’s not demanding that. I suspect he would have accepted just a nod.

Jess says he got a new mask and stronger meds “on the way out”. Intercepted by a Medica? (Medica: ugh, you’re all impossible. Fine, have meds if you’re going to insist on sneaking out.) Or lying?

Magic ring restrictions: no harming anyone unless they’re harming the wearer first, no taking away choices from people.

“My clever father,” Wolfe muttered. “Trust Eskander to find yet another way to make this more difficult.” At this point, Wolfe’s talked to Eskander what, once? On page, at least. And hasn’t exactly had a lot of opportunities for off-page conversations. So where is this coming from? Keria, I’m guessing. Wolfe doesn’t know his father, but I’ll bet he heard plenty about Eskander from his mother, whose view would be... biased, to say the least. Rumors from the Archivist and Artifex, too, maybe - he might have been close enough to either of them in the past to hear them griping about Eskander making trouble in the Iron Tower.

Dario-Wolfe parallels: Wolfe doesn’t want to die in a graveyard because that’s embarrassing, Dario doesn’t want to die like a commoner.

“We’ll make sure everyone knows how royally you bled to death.” Glain gets all the best lines.

Also, though. Here’s Dario saying he doesn’t want to kill the Archivist. He says it’s because he doesn’t want to be killed in revenge for that, but is that it? Or is this another hint at conflicted morality? Or devotion to Khalila, knowing she definitely wants a fair trial?

“Their old dormitory must have contained postulants for the upcoming year.” So, by my guess, this is happening in November. I really, really cannot think of a way this could be happening at the beginning of the school year. It would be hard, even, to push the date into December and say Jess means the new year not school year. So... Alexandria isn’t using the same calendar as us? (Where would that be on the ancient Egyptian/Greek calendar?) Or the Library starts school years irregularly? Or Jess is just out of it and not thinking that this group of postulants would already be pretty far into the program. Eh, let’s go with that. Jess is unreliable.

More Dad Wolfe moments: playful slaps on the head for Jess and Dario. @thegreatlibraryfangirl this is it. The closest thing to a sweet dad moment Dario gets. 

I’m kind of sad we don’t get any more Morgan POV. I’d like to know how she’s feeling about Jess when she hugs him here. Questioning her feelings again? Wanting to part on good terms? Just needing a bit of physical comfort and knowing he’ll give it?

So did Callum really set the trap like Jess asked? Or did Callum actually tip the Archivist off, leading the Archivist to send the Elites? I can see him playing both sides. 

Also, is this happening before or after Zara shoots the Archivist? Who knows.

““Any last words, Scholar? I’ll be happy to record them and add them to your journal... Oh, sorry, the Archivist has ordered your journals burned.” That’s just vicious. The Archivist didn’t just send his captain to kill Wolfe, he sent him to taunt Wolfe with an extremely sensitive subject first.

Ok, ok, another tiny little Wolfe-Dario moment: “I don’t have followers [...] Do I?” “No, sir [...] I’m afraid not. You’re too unlikable.” So we have some very small signs of affection between Wolfe and Dario, but they’re wrapped up in mock hostility. Fitting for both of them, since neither likes to show emotion or vulnerability, but still. Poor Dario.

“Make it between adults, if you can manage that.” Wolfe, snarking at gunpoint again. And trying to draw the enemy off the kids. (Unconventional patronus/animagus/daemon for Wolfe: a fucking killdeer.)

Interesting parallel here between Wolfe and Morgan tricking the Elites with Morgan’s illusion and Wolfe and Khalila in the Welsh general’s tent. Wolfe and kid tag teaming an enemy. But also parallels with the Philadelphia planning - once again, Wolfe and Morgan plan to save everyone at the cost of overusing Morgan’s power.

Wolfe tries to spare the Elites’ lives, but when he fails at that, he doesn’t hesitate to shoot the captain. But that’s while the captain is still grappling with Jess and Dario. Once the captain surrenders, Wolfe won’t shoot. How much of Wolfe’s thinking on when it’s ok to kill someone is influenced by all his work with Santi in war zones? This seems like a very military code of conduct. Give the enemy a chance to surrender, fight if he doesn’t, stop when he does.

So, the stabbing. It’s easy to see how Dario gets here. He’s spent the whole series characterizing himself as ruthless and willing to make hard choices, and in this book he’s just been told by the people he cares about that he can only help them by doing the dirty work. Over and over, he feels bad about what he has to do (or thinks he has to do), and over and over, he’s told it’s the only way. Add in whatever fucked up family backstory, and this is where he ends up.

This actually reminds me a bit of what @eli-wray said about Jess and Dario’s plan in Ash and Quill. This is an act of self sacrifice for Dario, much like that plan. He’s doing something he feels is wrong but necessary so that other characters don’t have to. In Dario’s view, the only way to get the information is to torture the captain, and his friends are good people so they shouldn’t have to do it. He’ll be the bad one for them. 

“I want this to be done, for all our sakes.” Here’s Dario’s main motivation. Dario is tired of this fight. He was tired of it after betraying Spain. He was tired of it at the start of this chapter. Dario just wants to get all of this over with. 

Dario’s grinning and threats have Jess freaked out, but we already know Dario is a good actor. I don’t think he’s having as much fun as he pretends he is. Will he feel as bad about this as the betrayal? No. But this is definitely adding to the list of reasons Dario does not think of himself as a good person or worthy of Khalila.

And where does Dario’s act fall apart? It cracks a bit when Wolfe asks him to stop, and he sounds more exhausted and frustrated than gleefully murderous. It shatters when he learns Khalila’s in danger. Genuinely murderous Dario isn’t grinning or taunting anyone. He’s just putting the knife right in the captain’s heart.

Anyway, enough Dario. I’m supposed to be rambling about Wolfe here. So, for obvious reasons, this isn’t going to be comfortable for Wolfe to watch. Jess is oblivious as usual, but we get a couple hints. First, Wolfe’s dialogue. We get “Dario, stop”, then nothing until he checks on Jess as they leave. Short sentences, basic word choices. Twice, Jess notes that “not even Wolfe” said anything. Wolfe gets quiet when he’s triggered. And then there’s the “bleak look in the Scholar’s eyes” at the end of the chapter. There’s more than enough to cause that - Khalila is in danger, Jess and Morgan are dying - but trauma is another cause. Pretty sure his expression has been described as “bleak” before when he’s triggered and/or remembering Rome. This is far from the worst trauma response Wolfe has had, but he’s definitely uncomfortable.

Wolfe might have more pragmatic reasons to object, too. He’s been tortured himself. He probably has a pretty good idea of how likely the captain is to give them true and useful information. This may not even be his first time in this kind of situation - there were those 10 war zones, after all. And sure enough, while the captain does point everyone in sort of the right direction, what he says is as much a taunt as an answer, and it’s leaving out quite a bit - possibly, the captain didn’t even know about the final plan to destroy the Archives. Wolfe would probably expect those problems. Dario doesn’t.

[murlendez101]

Ambulance Ride Pt. 2

Melendez felt his blood run cold. 'Shaun has been shot, his condition is getting worse' He looks up to see Claire give him a terrified look. His breathing became rapid. 'Not Shaun' "Dr. Melendez you need to breathe." He looks at Claire who had stepped closer from seeing him freaking out. "He's going to be ok."

'Will he though? What if he doesn't?' Melendez shakes those thoughts from his head. 'Since when did you get so attached to Shaun.' He doesn't have time to be thinking about this. "Prepare the OR, he's going to need surgery." Claire nods and goes to one of the nurses to pass on the information. Melendez then turns to Dr. Park and Morgan. "There's another fatal. It's Shaun. He's been shot in the stomach and his condition is rapidly going down. Prepare yourselves for a surgery." They both look concerned but nod their heads determined.

It wasn't five minutes later when the ambulance finally arrived.Neil saw Kalu and a paramedic step out of the ambulance with a stretcher. On the stretcher was Shaun. They wheeled him in. "Kalu status." Neil ordered.

"His O2 levels are down, but the bullet missed any vital organs. The bullet in still there, and if not taken out soon his conditions may worsen and can lead to death by bleeding out." Kalu finishes. Melendez nods. "Head to the OR. We're getting the bullet out now." They wheel Shaun down the hall and his team follows. An arm reaches out and stops Neil.

"You know you cannot operate on someone you're close to Neil, it's against the rules." Dr. Andrews says to him. "Listen I don't have time to argue with you about rules ok. The more time I spend here talking to you, the more chances he'll die. So you can take this rule and shove it where the sun don't shine and if the board has a problem with it they can find me later." Andrews looks shocked but Neil didn't have time to fully indulge on it as he went walking to the OR. He suites up with the rest of his team and heads into the operating room.

They made an incision where the bullet was, and sewed off anything that was destroyed in the process. Suddenly the monitor went off. Neil looked up. "I don't understand we got the whole place fixed." He was freaking out. 'I can't let him die, not lie this.' Claire walks over, assessing the area.

"We should've closed off anything." She said still looking for anything abnormal. Kalu leaned over. "All signs are showing internal bleeding."

"But we closed off everything." Morgan adds. "There has to be bleeding somewhere. Maybe we missed it." He replies back. He moves the gown over to the right side to see if there's anything over there. "There shouldn't be anything over there. The bullet only hit the left side." Claire says pointing to the left side. "But, a piece of the bullet could've gone to the other side and damaged something." Kalu says still looking for an obvious sign of internal bleeding. "See, there." He points to the bruising of skin.

"That's an obvious sign of internal bleeding." Park says. Neil takes a breath in. 'Shaun's gonna be ok, we found the problem.' "Good work Dr. Kalu." Neil says to him. Kalu nods. "Alright let's get to work." They make an incision right where the bruise is. Blood comes pouring out. "When this clears, we need to find the shrapnel that is lodged someone in here." They found the shrapnel and Shaun's vitals go back to normal. "Ok, let's stitch him back up and we'll be done."

'Thank god he's going to live.' Neil cleans himself off and brushes off any bad thoughts about the operation. Then he stops suddenly. 'Do I like Shaun?' His reactions were a bit over the top. 'You would react the same if any other of your residents were in an accident.'

'But would I?' Shaun is different to him. When Neil is mad or having a rough day, seeing Shaun makes him smile and feel safe. Even thinking of him now brings a smile to his face. He sighs. Shaun won't like a guy like Neil. Neil is stubborn and snaps at people a lot. Neil sometimes hates himself for not trying to open up to people and never getting to know them personally. I guess that's why he doesn't have a lot of close people in his life.

He walks out of the locker room and is greeted by Dr. Glassman. "Don't even try to tell me that my actions were wrong. I know what I did." Neil starts. Instead of getting bashed he got hugged. It took Neil a second to register it, then he finally hugged back. He slouched against the hug, realizing how tired and emotionally exhausted he was. It was a four hour long surgery, mostly because he ran through everything that could go wrong and tried to deflect it while he still could. Dr. Glassman patted his back then let him go.

"No I'm not here to bash you or tell you that you were wrong. I'm here to tell you thank you for saving Shaun's life. I don't know what I would've done if you didn't go against Andrews. Speaking of, don't worry about the board i'll handle that for you."

"Thank you Aaron." Neil says smiling slightly. "Where is Shaun at now?" "He;s in room 122." Neil and Aaron both head down to the room to check on Shaun. When they stepped into the room, Neil had to look away. It brought physical pain to him when he saw Shaun hooked up to all the wires.

'It's your fault you made him go on the ambulance.' Neil felt a hand on his shoulder. He looks up and sees Aaron giving him an encouraging nod. Neil breathes deeply to compose himself and walks over to the side of the bed. He checks Shaun's vitals, once. Twice. Again and again until he finally says he's ok. He's stable. He's alive.

"Neil." Aaron calls. Neil turns and looks at him, expecting him to give bad news but it didn't happen. "He's going to be fine. He's stable. You did good now sit down and relax."

'I can't relax. I did this to him. It's my fault he's lying in the bed covered in wires.' Neil sat down in the chair right beside Shaun's bed. He moved to grab Shaun's hand but decided against. Aaron had ended up pulling up a seat beside Neil's.

"You care for him a lot, I can see it in the way your hyperactive about his care. I mean four hours for a bullet removing surgery, that takes you only two hours on a good day. You went through every possibility of what could go wrong and fixed it." Aaron finished keeping his eyes trained on Neil's face. Neil looks back at him, searching his face for any emotion, but all he can see is sincerity. He looks back down to the bed where Shaun's hand lays open towards the ceiling. "I don't know why Aaron." Neil says turning to Aaron. "Oh but I think you do Neil." Neil looked confused but it dawned on him. 'He wouldn't do this to any other of his residents because Neil loves Shaun. He loves Shaun so much that he would fight the board and get fired if it meant he would live.'

"I can't Aaron." Neil says panicking. Shaun wouldn't like him. Not after how he treated him when they first met. "He would never like me." Aaron chuckles. "You are so oblivious." Neil takes offence at that comment. "I meant as in he likes you too." Neil makes on 'Oh' face then he turns panicked again. 'Why would he like me? I'm.......me.' Aaron noticing his reaction places a hand on his shoulder. "You are a good person Neil. Shaun can see that in you, that's why he always listens to you. That's why he's always encouraging you to do better. Because he believes in you. Don't doubt yourself Neil. Besides I don't wanna be the one that has to beat you up if you do something wrong." Neil laughs a little at that. He looks at Shaun, his face softening in affection.

"Take care of him Neil. He needs you." Aaron says, patting Neil's shoulder once and standing up. "Please call me if his conditions change. I'm going to grab lunch and be right back." Neil nods. When Aaron leaves Neil goes back to thinking.

'What if we do get together?' Neil smiles at the thought. He would get to see Shaun everyday, kiss his beautiful face, touch his hair and so many other things. Of course he'd make sure it was ok for Shaun considering he doesn't like being touched. Neil looks down at the bed where Shaun's hand lays. Neil raised his hand and rested it with Shaun's. He stayed there for a while, absentmindedly rubbing Shaun's knuckles with his thumb. He was so lost in thought that he almost didn't register the hand squeezing his hand back. Neil looked up to see Shaun's blue eyes piercing into him. He made a move to remove his hand, knowing Shaun doesn't like touch when the hand wouldn't let him go. Neil expected him to be disgusted or at the least uncomfortable but Shaun didn't show any of that. Instead he held on tighter.

"How are you feeling Shaun?" Neil asks quietly.

"I am in pain." His other hand reaches up to his chest, rubbing it slightly. "Would you like more pain medicine? It's probably worn off a little by now." Shaun nods his head, and Neil stands up to reach for the IV bag but stops short when the hand he was holding, holds him back. “Shaun you gotta let go if you want more pain meds.” He grumbles slightly but lets go of his hand. Neil rolls his eyes, smiles and gets to work. He puts in more pain meds, checks Shaun’s vitals for the millionth time and settles back in the chair. He looks at Shaun, relishing the fact he’s alive and with him.

“It didn’t feel wrong.” Shaun says suddenly. Neil looks at him confused. It takes Shaun a couple seconds to answer again. “You held my hand. It didn’t feel wrong.” Neil stops. “It didn’t feel wrong.” He repeats back to Shaun. He nods. “I just said that.” “I know I was making sure I heard correctly.” Shaun turns to look at him. “I didn’t know you couldn’t hear.” Neil chuckles. “No Shaun, I can hear perfectly fine. I meant it as I couldn’t believe it.” Shaun nods and turns back to the ceiling. Neil took out his phone surfing through emails and also to tet Aaron that Shaun is awake and fine.

“I like you.” Neil looks up from his phone and smiles at Shaun. “I like you too.” Shaun turns to him. “I mean as I romantically like you.” Neil smiles even more. “As I said before I like you too. As in I like you romantically.” Shaun turns to him and smiles slightly. “Can I hold your hand?” Shaun asks. “Yes.” Neil brings his hand up and Shaun grabs onto it. He tenses slightly but relaxes, not having this be normal for him. “Get some rest Shaun. I’ll be here when you wake up, okay?” “Okay.”  With that Shaun closes his eyes but still holds onto Neils hand. Once Shaun was fully asleep Neil let go of his hand. He stood up and headed for the door considering he was still at work and had to tend to other patients. He’d much rather stay with Shaun but his job wouldn’t allow that. He took one last look at Shaun and headed out into the hall, smiling as he went.

to be continued

[just-a-kj-blog]

I Can’t Stay Any Longer - Part 4

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Hello! I decided to repost my stories on my new blog. If you have any questions, feel free to send me an ask or a pm. This was written about a year ago, so be nice heheheh

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Relationships: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Summary: Reader and Bucky are living together after the events of Ultron and, in the midst of a nightmare, Bucky does something he truly regrets.This follows Tony and Steve’s confrontation with the reader. Now she must deal with Natasha and Clint… (Y/N - your name)

Warnings: angst, anxiety, injured reader, swearing, hospital scenario

Word Count: 2292

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Part 1   Part 2   Part 3   Part 4   Part 5   Part 6   Part 7   Part 8   Part 9   Epilogue

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I Can’t Stay Any Longer - Part 4 by just-a-kj-blog, previously nenyakj

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Previously:

I plop my head back onto the multiple pillows, feeling drained. Xiomara had given me a shot of Oxycodone just now and I can feel it starting to take effect. Warmth spreads throughout my body, erasing the pain and making my eyelids feel heavy. I can hear fabric rustle near me as the lights turn off overhead.

“Sleep, Y/n. We’ll be here when you wake up.” Steve brushes my hair back as Tony presses the button to unfold the bed back to 180 degrees, tucking the blankets around me as I slip into a deep sleep.

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Low murmuring wakes me up out of a weird sleep. I had a strange dream but as soon as I wake up, it’s gone. Hate it when that happens.

Moaning, I open my eyes, feeling groggy and floaty. Geez, the pain meds here are good shit. I giggle a little to myself.

“Feeling good there, kid?” I hear Tony chuckle.

“Mmmhmmmm,” I respond, closing my eyes, stretching and arching my back.

“Y/n, careful!” Steve insists, putting a large hand on my rib cage, completely encompassing it. “You don’t want to pop your ribs out of place, honey.”

“Mmmm then just pop them back into place,” I growl at him, a silly smile on my face, eyes still closed.

“Hey, Snoop Dogg, hate to kill your buzz, but Tasha and Barton are on their way up,” Tony replies softly, patting my hand.

My eyes fly open, sobering up pretty quickly. I try to sit up, but Steve keeps his hands on my ribs. Tony pushes the button on the bed rail to raise up the head of the bed.

Groaning and still feeling a bit lightheaded, I clear my throat and reach for the big jug of water. My eyes follow Tony and Steve as they head over to the floor-length windows, talking among themselves.

Setting the cup down, I look down at my chest, dark finger bruises on display, and quickly cover myself up with the blankets.

Oh Lord, let this go ok.

A soft knock sounds at the door. Steve glances at me as he goes to answer it.

My two favorite bad asses carefully step into the room, dressed in their black combat suits, armed to the teeth, their sharp eyes quickly taking in every detail. I shrink a bit back into the bed as their gazes finally rest on me.

I’m sure I look an absolute fright. My messy curls poofed out in a rat’s nest, falling down my shoulders. My cheek bruised down my face to the side of my mouth, butterfly bandages above and below my lips in a line.

Clint tightens his jaw and his eyebrows lower, his posture straightens as he widens his stance. I can see him clench his fist around the folded bow attached at his hip. He stands stock still, his eyes fixed on my chest, no doubt picturing the last time he saw me, covered in blood.

Natasha’s reaction surprises me, to be honest. I was expecting silent rage akin to Clint’s, and threats to Bucky’s manhood. But no, she acts the complete opposite.

Her eyebrows raise in genuine concern, fear fleeting across her face as she takes me in. She hurries to my side, her gaze roaming my body, hands fluttering about like she doesn’t know where she can touch me. Breathing out a tiny sob, she settles on touching my shoulders and leaps up onto the bed, wrapping her arms around me. She buries her face in my neck, careful to keep her weight off of me.

Tears prick my eyes as I hug her small waist. She really is my sister, even though we aren’t actually related. The break in her stoic exterior is proof of the anxiety and worry she must have been feeling the past 20 hours or so. My heart warms a bit, lifting up the corners of my mouth in a tiny smile.

Looking up at the guys, I sniff a little, resting my chin on her shoulder.  

Clint is focused on the ceiling, possibly holding back tears. Angry tears. Tony is hiding behind his phone, tapping away, jaw clenching. Steve has his arms crossed, turned back to watching the city, shoulders tense.

Taking a breath, I brace myself to ask a question I’m not sure I want the answer to.

“Did you find him?” I whisper into the silence.

Steve and Tony both look towards Clint, who lowers his gaze back to me.

“He’s in Vermont. Still on the move. We were on his trail when Cap gave us the order to return,” Clint replies, voice without emotion, face stern.

“Vermont?” I ask myself, looking down at the bed, confused as to where he might be going.

Nat sniffles and leans back, releasing me and wiping her eyes discreetly. Taking a deep breath, she adjusts herself to sit on the bed, laying down next to me, squished into the space between myself and the railing.

“He’s trying to go off the grid,” she says in her soft, raspy voice, curling a strand of my hair behind my ear, her green eyes looking me over.

“Not gonna work, FRIDAY has access to every camera and recording device on the planet,” Tony replies, sitting on the couch, resting his elbows on his knees. “The facial recognition software I designed can find him and track his every move.”

“What if he goes where there are no cameras?” I quietly ask.

Before Tony could respond, Clint steps forward to the end of the bed. He glances down at my blanket-covered chest, flicking his eyes back to mine.

“What happened, bug?” he asks quietly.

I can’t help but smile at his nickname for me.

It takes a moment for me to prepare myself for telling the story again, but I trust these people with my life, and I’ve never felt safer than when I am with them.

I used to feel that way about Bucky…

Shaking my head to clear it, I delve into the story, eyes focusing on the blankets I’ve twisted around my fingers.

Nat stiffens when I reach the part where Bucky said I would have left him anyways, like I did with Josh. She is the only person who knew what a cruel bastard he was to me. Her hand finds mine as I continue on, twitching when I retell the part of Bucky pushing me back over the bed.

I can feel everyone tense up when I explain how I started to cough up blood and stumbled to call Tony. Then, after taking a somewhat deep breath, I explain what the doctor reported on my injuries.

Silence reigns over the room as I finish, much like when I told Steve and Tony what happened.

“Son of a bitch,” Clint growls after a moment. He looks up at the ceiling, anger and determination darkening his face. “I’m gonna kill him.”

“Get in line, Barton,” Tony snaps, standing up, his anger renewed, and turning away from me to speak into his phone. “FRIDAY, initiate facial recognition on Barnes, start in Vermont-” He pauses and glances back at Nat.

“Montpelier,” she softly responds.

“Tony, wait-” I start, sitting up.

“Montpelier, put out a BOLO to the local PD, make sure they do not attempt to engage, stay back and contact us when found.”

“As you wish, Boss,” FRIDAY responds.

Steve turns from the window, dropping his arms from his chest, looking grim and determined.

“Barton, did you bring the quinjet?” he asks, going into full Cap mode.

“It’s on the roof, ready to go,” Clint answers, making for the door.

Nat nimbly leaps off the bed and steps after Clint. “We have the net prepped.”

“Including the electric shock upgrade to kill the arm?” Steve asks, shrugging into his brown leather jacket.

“Got you covered, Cap, it’s all locked and loaded,” Clint responds from the hallway.

My world is reeling, I feel like I’m losing control. Panic courses through me, feeling like everything is slipping through my fingers.

“WAIT!” I shout, grasping at my chest at the flare of pain zinging through my broken ribs.

Everyone freezes and turns to me, Clint peeking in from outside the door.

“Stop. Stop right now,” I command, my blood beginning to boil in my veins. How dare they just try and take off like I’m not even here.

“Y/n-” Tony begins.

“No! Listen to me, going after Bucky like you plan on meeting him in battle is not going to happen!!” I exclaim. “And what the fuck?!?! Steve, electric shock?? Do you even remember the reports on what Hydra did to him?? That is fucking cruel and it’ll only exacerbate the situation!!” I yell at them.

Ignoring the pain, I scramble up onto my knees so I’m level with them, pulling the blankets around my hips to cover my modesty.

“Y/n,” Natasha holds out her hands in a placating manner, slowly approaching the bed.

“No!! Fucking listen to what I’m saying!! Bucky made a mistake! Yes, it was a bad mistake and I almost died-” they all wince at that “-but it was a mistake nonetheless. It was a stressful situation, he was panicking. That’s not an excuse, I know, and he needs to face what he’s done, but you are NOT hunting him down like a fucking ANIMAL!!”

“Y/n, he needs to be found,” Steve insists, his stoic exterior breaking slightly.

“Yes, he does. But not like this,” I gesture at them all. “Bucky is one of you. He is broken. How do you think he’ll react if you all show up like this, guns blazing??”

“I don’t give a shit how he reacts, Y/n, I give a shit about kicking his ass for what he’s done to you!!” Clint growls, coming back inside. He inhales sharply at the dark finger-shaped bruises peeking out from the wrapping around my chest, revealed when the blankets pooled to my lap. “Jesus…” he whispers, a pained look on his face.

Natasha comes to stand next to him, her expression grim as she takes in my bruise. Her green eyes raise up to meet mine, her jaw clenching, then lowering again. There’s the anger I was looking for.

“We’re wasting time,” she says through clenched teeth to no one in particular.

Steve paces up to the side of the bed.

“Y/n, what would you have us do?” he asks gently, brushing my hair back from my cheek, his earlier stern expression turned soft and worried.

“Let me come with you,” I insist. I hold up both hands, palms out, as they all start protesting at once, silencing them. “When I can leave. The doctor says I have to stay for at least 72 hours. Give me that time to heal, then take me with you to see him. He’ll just run or fight you otherwise.”

“You expect to be in ship shape condition in 72 hours?” Clint replies, an eyebrow raised, clearly not believing me.

“At least out of danger,” I respond, sitting back down on my butt, stretching my legs out in front of me again.

“No, Y/n you’ll still have fresh open wounds inside your lungs! Your ribs will still be broken, still in danger of puncturing you again! Why-” Tony rants but is stopped by Nat’s hand on his shoulder. He glances back at her.

“Why do you want to come with us?” she asks calmly, watching my reaction intently.

I lean back onto into the pillows, swallowing loudly.

“I don’t want you to hurt him. I don’t want any of you to get hurt,” I whisper, looking down at my hands. “If I’m there, I’ll be able to stop the fight. He’ll see that I'm… hurt and….” My voice trails off.

“And what, beg for forgiveness?? Then you’ll ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after?” Clint seethes. “He almost killed you!!” He steps closer to the bed. “Y/n, I got to you first!” he shouts, a hand pointing to his chest. “I found you gasping for breath, a crumpled broken doll on the floor!” His voice breaks as he quickly circles the bed and takes my shoulders, lifting my chin with his hand.

“You almost died,” his voice breaks, begging me to understand. “I almost lost my little bug. He deserves every fucking punch we land on him for ever laying a finger on you!!”

My face scrunches up as sobs tear out of my throat, my heart aching for this man who loves me like his own children. I reach for him and he pulls me to his chest, hiding his face in my messy hair. I can feel him shaking as he tries to control his cries.

I hear Nat sniff and come up beside us, putting both arms around us and tucking her face into Clint’s shoulder. The bed dents low as Steve sits behind me, hugging us with his huge arms. Tony reluctantly steps closer to us, squeaking when Steve pulls him down into our embrace.

“Ok, that was adorable,” I mumble at Tony.

“Shut it, House, or I’m taking away your Oxy,” Tony voice mumbles from somewhere around Steve’s armpit.

“He liked Vicodin,” I snark back, smiling at the muffled chuckles coming from the others.

“Boss, your facial recognition software has come back with a 99% match on Sergeant Barnes. He’s attempting to cross the Canadian Border just north of Richford, on Route 139,” FRIDAY’s voice sounds from Tony’s pocket.

Another silence permeates the room, broken by Sam rushing in through the open doorway, sweaty and breathing hard.

“She awake?!”

To be continued…

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Part 1   Part 2   Part 3   Part 4   Part 5  Part 6  Part 7   Part 8   Part 9   Epilogue

Tagging: @melissa-anne-rose @simplyme8308 @lucian-tate @lovekrystina @bolontiku @your-dark-magic-man-mysterio @thestrangedoctorisin @theweatherwitch @magellan-88 @torilovelytop @mymourningtea @mcuimxgine @magicalhufflehuggles @ramxna-marxtta @spinsterlocity @blackroseyaz @secondsandstars @the-squid-one @justreadingfics @justareader @suz-123 @plumfondler

[fortheloveofpearlet]

Anatomy of a Lie [Chapter 5]

A/N - mild mentions of homophobia but not really? Shorter chapter because I’m getting lazy.Jason-centric.

Chapter 5

Atlanta, Georgia

Paul Dardo had once been a large man, in every sense of the word. Most people he encountered would be instantly intimidated by his stature, and it didn’t help matters that he had a naturally gruff face; he always looked as though he’d just caught a whiff of something unpleasant. That was just the way his face fell. But they say you should never judge a book by its cover. Paul Dardo was the poster child for that saying. 

He was soft spoken, once upon a time he’d had a very sunny demeanour, but nowadays it was slightly more melancholy than it used to be. But despite that he was sweet and kind and friendly. Growing up Jason had always referred to him as his very own Big Friendly Giant. It wasn’t his fault he was mildly homophobic, Jason blamed that on the age he grew up in. He knew that wasn’t true, he knew there were plenty of people his dads age that were much more accepting of such things and maybe Jason shouldn’t make excuses for him but he couldn’t help but love his dad regardless of his flaws. Admittedly Jason had never seen that side of him and he only had his mother’s word back then that he wouldn’t have understood the kiss Jason had shared with his high school friend. He’d never have risked finding out his reaction for a stupid kiss that meant nothing.

Jason remembered his father being so large, the kind of person that could protect you from all the bad in the world. But now as he watched his father carry over their coffees on a tray and groan a little as he did so, he thought his father looked half the man he used to be. He’s dying, Jason thought, he’ll never admit it but I can tell.

‘You know boy I can’t even remember the last time I saw you.’ Paul Dardo’s hands were shaking as he set the tray down on the coffee table. He sat down in the chair opposite Jason and with a little struggle he pulled a cigarette and a lighter from his pocket. He placed the cigarette between his lips and fumbled with the lighter. Jason heard it spark a few times in failed attempts to light.

'Everything ok?’

'Arthritis.’ His dad spoke around the cigarette. Jason eyed up his hands. He could barely grip the lighter, let alone anything bigger. Jason ran his fingers through his hair. He already knew there was no way his dad could have sent those messages, not that he’d really suspected him. He was here more to make peace with his dad, maybe have one weight lifted from his shoulders.

'Here let me help.’ Jason sat forward and took the cigarette and lighter. He put the cigarette limply between his lips and in one swift move lit it. He coughed a little as some of the smoke entered his lungs. Jason used to smoke, back in his med school days. Every now and again he would have one when he drank but he couldn’t remember the last time he’d had one. He handed it back to his dad and took a sip of the coffee hoping it would help.

'How long has it been?’ His father sat back in his chair holding the cigarette between arthritic fingers.

'I don’t even know.’ Jason lied. Always with the lies. The last time Jason had seen his father was five years ago. If you gave Jason a minute to work it out he could probably tell you the exact days since he’d last seen him. It felt like it was yesterday and a million years ago all at once.

He squeezed Courtney’s hand as they made their way down the street to his childhood home. The new engagement ring glistened in the sunlight on her finger. He couldn’t wait for his parents to meet his new fiancée, he was a little sceptical about having her meet them though. As they got close to the house he suddenly wished he’d told them he was coming rather than having an impromptu visit. Hindsight’s a bitch. The yelling could be heard several houses down and as the house came into view his whole world turned upside down. His mother was on the front lawn and his father was hanging out of the upstairs window while he threw things down in his mom’s direction.

'Paul for Christ sake would you calm down and open the door!’ His mom yelled.

'Open the door?’ His dad scoffed. 'You are never stepping foot in this house again you whore!' 

Jason stopped at the front gate, letting go of Courtney’s hand. He’d never heard his dad so angry before. 

'You’re overreacting.’ His mom folded her arms and rolled her eyes.

'Overreacting?’ His father bellowed. 'You were cheating on me!’

Jason’s blood ran cold. He wanted to walk away before he was spotted but he couldn’t get his legs to work. He had completely forgotten Courtney was there until she came close to him and stroked his arm.

'Jason, maybe we should-’

'Be quiet.’ He scalded her. His dad’s eyes flicked up and landed on Jason. Jason felt like a small child in that moment.

'Jason boy! Tell me I am not overreacting here. Your mother has been having an affair and I think I’m acting in a reasonable fashion.’

His mother turned to look at him now too and she had that same dangerous glint in her eye she had the day she’d threatened Jason into keeping her secret.

'Uhm she’s what?’ Jason croaked looking between the two of them. His mother smirked and shook her head a little before looking back up at his dad.

'Oh please Jason don’t pretend you didn’t know.’

Jason could hear his heart beating in his ears. Don’t do it you bitch, don’t fucking do it. But she did.

'Jason’s been keeping my secret for years.’

Jason wanted to punch her. He wanted to try and insist she was lying. His dad looked at him, a whole new wave of hurt washed across his face.

'Is that true?’ His voice was much lower now and his eyes looked broken. Jason swallowed. He’d always been good at lying, too good. But in that moment he couldn’t even comprehend a lie.

'I uhm…well…’

Jason’s dad bit his lip and if Jason wasn’t mistaken he swore he saw tears in the older man’s eyes. And then he slammed the window shut and disappeared inside. His mother turned to look at him with that malicious smirk on her face and took great pleasure in saying, 'I told you Jason, if he’s going to hate me, he’s going to hate you too.’

'It’s been quite some time.’ Paul Dardo sucked on his cigarette.

'Yeah.' Five fucking years. They hadn’t spoken in a really long time after that, his dad hadn’t even come to his wedding. Recently they’d started talking again but this was the first time in five years he’d come face to face with his dad.

'What brings you down here then boy?’

'Well uhm…I never got a chance to explain you know? Why I lied for mom.’ He thought he may as well jump straight to the point, he didn’t like the idea of being in Atlanta any longer than he had to be. His father’s facial expression didn’t change, he just continued to drag on the cigarette. Jason hated how the smoke sat thick in the air of the room, it reminded him of his childhood.

'We don’t need to talk about that.’

'Yes we do.’ Jason sat forward and leant on his knees. 'You know I wanted to tell you right dad? She basically threatened me into keeping her secret. I was just a kid, I didn’t want to lie to you.’

'Jason, I don’t want to talk about that woman.’ He dropped the cigarette into the ashtray on the coffee table but didn’t put it out, probably because he couldn’t. He used both hands to cup the coffee mug as he picked up and brought it to his lips.

'I had a secret too. She threatened to tell you.’ Jason blurted out. He hadn’t come all this way for his dad not to listen to him. Mr Dardo looked at his son over his mug, his expression unreadable.

'What kind of a secret?' 

'Now you wanna talk about her?’ Jason raised an eyebrow at his dad. His dad took another sip of the coffee before putting the mug back down again, his hands shaking.

'I don’t ever want to talk about her.’ He told Jason. 'But it might make it a little easier to know how my only child could lie to me like that.’

Jason sighed. If he told his dad the truth would this whole thing be over? Would he stop being tormented? God he hoped so.

'Do you remember my high school friend Brian?' 

'Vaguely. Why?’

'We…we kissed once. Mom said she was going to tell you if I told you about her affair. I wasn’t gay, I told her that but she said you wouldn’t see it that way and that you wouldn’t understand. I was scared dad, I didn’t know what to do.’ A small tear escaped Jason’s eye and he held his breath while he awaited his dad’s reaction. His dad picked the mug back up holding it as firmly as he could in his hands and brought it to his lips. He nodded at the cigarette packet on the table.

'Light me another please boy.’

Jason swallowed and did as he was told. He had no idea what to expect. He lit his dad a cigarette managing to not inhale any of the smoke this time and handed it to the older man. His dad held it between his uncooperative fingers.

'You said you wasn’t gay. What does that mean?’ He took a drag on the cigarette. Jason frowned, did he say that? And if he had, why was that what his dad was picking up on?

'I don’t know.’ Jason shook his head. 'I mean I’m not. I’m not gay.’

Mr Dardo briefly looked out the window before looking back at Jason.

'It hurts me more than you will ever know to hear that you didn’t think I’d understand.’ His words kind of hung in the room like the smoke from the cigarette. Jason wasn’t sure what to make of it.

'You wouldn’t have cared?’ He sat back up and eyed his dad up. The older man’s facial expression didn’t change.

'Jason,’ he paused to drag on the cigarette. 'You are my son. I’ve always loved you and I always will love you. No matter what.’

Jason’s heart felt as though it had skipped several beats. His dad didn’t care? He’d spent all those years terrified of his mom telling him about that kiss but his dad didn’t care? His mom had somehow convinced him his dad wouldn’t take too kindly to finding out Jason had kissed another man, Jason had spent all this time thinking of his dad as some kind of homophobic man. But he wasn’t. He hadn’t even batted an eyelid at Jason’s revelation.

'You don’t care.’ Jason whispered as though he didn’t believe it.

'I’ve only ever wanted you to be happy boy.’ Paul Dardo shrugged, taking another pull on the cigarette. 'Now, why did you say you wasn’t gay?' 

Jason sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. He needed to be more careful about what he said.

'It’s complicated.’

'How so? I see you’re still married?’ He nodded to Jason’s ring.

'Yeah.’

'Is there someone else? Someone of the same gender perhaps?’

God his dad could see right through him. Jason twirled the ring around on his finger.

'Maybe.' 

'Do you love him?’

Love? Jason had never allowed himself to think of such things. When it came to his feelings for Matt he put them in a little box in the back of his head and marked them ’to deal with later’. He didn’t want to get feelings involved. It was just a fling. A fling that was costing him a lot. 

'I don’t know.’ Jason told him honestly. 'I know the last thing you want to hear is me having an affair after what mom did to you. Maybe it runs in the family, maybe I was destined to this because of her. I’m no better than she is.’ Jason put his head in his hands suddenly feeling sorry for himself. He had no right to, he’d brought this all on himself. He sat there for a moment before he felt the weight shift on the couch and when he looked up his dad was sat next to him. His dad put his hand on Jason’s shoulder.

'Don’t say that. Affairs happen Jason, sadly it’s just a part of life. But there’s one big thing that sets you and your mother apart.’

'What’s that?’ Jason’s sniffed. His dad dropped the cigarette in the ashtray.

'A conscious.’ He shrugged. 'Your mother never once felt bad about what she did but clearly this is eating you up inside. You’re a good kid Jason, you always have been. But sometimes even the best of people get dragged into bad situations.' 

Jason felt tears in his eyes again as he looked at his dad. He should have known his dad wouldn’t have cared. He should have told his dad about his mom’s affair when he found out and saved the older man years more heartache. Of course his dad didn’t care, he couldn’t believe he’d ever thought he would. Jason couldn’t help but throw his arms around his dad and embrace the older man. He felt smaller than he used to, he felt frail. You’re dying, I just know it. But he also knew if he was his dad wouldn’t tell him. Jason learnt how to keep secrets from the best of them.

'Thanks dad, it means a lot to hear you say that.’

Mr Dardo wrapped his arms around his son and held him as tightly as he could with his weak muscles. Jason rested his head on his dad’s shoulder. He supposed if one good thing was going to come of this anon tormenting him, he’d finally managed to repair his relationship with his dad. He hoped it was over now. He had a feeling it wasn’t though.