#he would learn one or two songs and then move on to something else
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songbird-and-her-fos · 2 days ago
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Dance Lessons
Emmrich/F!Rook
Emmrich likes to indulge in the finer arts, including dance, and wants to share this with Rook. Sadly, Rook has little confidence in her dancing abilities
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A quiet day at the Lighthouse. Lyrei “Rook” Ingellvar didn’t know what drew her to the small hidden room with the big piano, but she found herself there nonetheless. There were so many more enjoyable things she could spend her time with, she told herself, so why come here? Perhaps it was the instrument itself that attracted her to this seldom visited corner of the Lighthouse; Rook loved music, though she had never had the opportunity to learn to play. So her fingers only lightly grazed the ivories, never truly pressing any of them hard enough to produce a sound.
She missed music. Be it the lengthy elegies written for funerals back in Nevarra or lively drinking songs filling the air of taverns; she hadn’t heard any of that in way too long a time.
Hadn’t Bellara discovered an ancient Elven music box not too long ago? Just as Rook resolved to ask about it soon, someone entered the room.
“So this is where you’ve been hiding, dearest. I’ve been looking for you.”
She turned around, her face lighting up with a smile. “Emmrich.”
He held up the artifact in his hands. “I asked Bellara if she would let us borrow her music box; there’s something I want us to try with it.” He placed it on a nearby table. “I had at first considered trying to teach Manfred how to play the piano for us; he was very interested, but I think he needs to focus on his magic training for the time being.”
“Now you’re making me curious”, Rook said cheerfully. “Don’t keep me in suspense like that!”
“My darling, have you ever tried dancing?”
Rook bit her lip. “I haven’t. I’m not sure I would be any good at it, to be honest.”
Emmrich stretched out his arms to pull her against him. “Nonsense. I see how you move in battle; you are a born dancer if I’ve ever seen one.”
Her eyes flitted about the room, for the first time trying to look at anything but him. “I don’t want to embarrass myself; especially not in front of you.”
Emmrich leaned forward and kissed her. “I would never judge you, you know that. Come, we'll start with a simple waltz. Without music, so you can get a feeling for the steps first.”
Rook hesitated for a moment, but found herself unable to say no to him. Not when he was so excited at the prospect of dancing with her. “...Okay, but I take no responsibility for any damage done to your toes.”
“Marvelous! It's easy, really.” He placed one hand on her waist and took hers with the other. “Start by taking a step forward with your left foot, then a sideways step with your right foot…”
This “simple waltz” felt anything but simple at first. She executed the steps just as Emmrich instructed, but kept losing the rhythm and felt her face heat up every time she stumbled. Just when she was about to ask if it was time to stop, Emmrich paused.
“Rook, my dearest, you are way too stiff. Relax. Don’t worry too much about executing every step perfectly. Just focus on me.”
Rook took another deep breath. “Focus on you. Okay. I can do that.” She concentrated on his eyes, gentle and loving as ever. No trace of judgement or annoyance. He moved, and she followed, her mind easing to a pleasant emptiness that left space for the two of them, and nothing else. She barely noticed when his hand slightly moved and the music box began playing. It was an ancient Elven song, a far cry from modern ballroom music, but it still flowed into their movements like a guiding breeze. That was her entire world in this moment; music and movement… and Emmrich, smiling at her as if she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
“I knew you could do it.” Delight lit up his eyes.
“What can I say? I have an excellent teacher.”
Step by step, they twirled through the room, allowing themselves to get lost in the moment. One, two, three…
Emmrich’s hoarse chuckle slightly pulled her from her thoughts. “You are absolutely beautiful. I can’t believe how lucky I am to have you.”
The corners of her mouth twitched upwards. “Says the stunning man in front of me.”
He laughed, and her heart did a little flip.
The song slowly fizzled out, and with a final spin, Emmrich, kissed her and then rested his forehead against hers. “I love you.”
“And I love you. And… thank you for teaching me how to dance. Maybe we can do this more often?”
“Whenever you like, my dearest.”
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birdlover9000 · 1 month ago
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Reigen Week Day 4: Hobbies
That 0.5 second clip of him stomping on a distortion pedal in the s3 intro lives in my head 24/7 ,,,
Prompts by @wings-of-scarlet-light !
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celestiamour · 1 month ago
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‧₊˚✧ ❛[ under your roof ]❜
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ft. logan howlett x f! reader — xmen, marvel
╰₊✧ your baby daughter really likes uncle wade’s roommate, and logan would be lying if he said he didn’t form a quick attachment to the two of you as well┊2.9k words; prt one (here), prt two, prt three coming soon!!
setting: deadpool & wolverine (2024) worst! logan contains: probably occ logan, he’s on his best behavior, mostly fluff with a little side of angst, single mother reader with an unspecified age, this chapter is mainly between logan & your daughter, reader has a bad relationship with the father & he’s an asshole, one joking threat of stabbing
➤ author's note: this was so much fun to write! single mom reader and her daughter are so lovely and i have two more part featuring these two and logan coming up! i hope you guys enjoy
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kids don’t like logan. it’s not a profound discovery nor is it a surprise to anyone who learns this fact. he’s intimidating enough to make some full-grown men piss themselves with so much as a glare, much less little babies who start sobbing uncontrollably when they see a giant scary man walking around believing that he would eat them or something even though he’s literally just standing there. whether the little ones have an instinct that signals him out as a mutant or he simply looks like a bad man from one of their fairy tales, he isn’t sure, but it’s not the best feeling either way when he’s trying to settle back into normal life with the constant weight of knowing that he’ll never fit in.
it doesn’t help that, in general, he isn’t good with kids either. he’s generally patient with their immaturity since they don’t know any better, but he finds the crying and whining extremely headache-inducing to his sensitive senses without a clue how to calm them down.
moving in with wade and acquainting himself with his friends was a start, but the missing part of his life to make him finally feel loved and at home was the family of two who lived downstairs. the first time he met you was also the first time he met your daughter when wade told him to dress a little nicer because the two of them were invited to your place for dinner. he explained that the two of you were practically siblings and that it would probably be something he should get used to, reminding him to “turn that frown upside down” because he was about to meet someone who “puts gordon ramsey to shame.”
the last bit sounded great to him, especially because no one in their household knew how to make anything more complicated than noodles without setting it on fire and the cost of outside food was really starting to tally up. still, he just wore some cargo pants and threw on a leather jacket, running his fingers through his hair once which was already a lot more effort than he’s ever put into meeting anyone else before.
wade didn’t even bother knocking, just being himself and picking the lock as he so typically does, kicking the door open and yelling a loud ass “daddy’s home!” which echoed throughout the apartment as well as the hallway they were standing in. the mouth-watering smell of grilled salmon filled the air, making wade hum in excitement, “do you need help with anything? taste testing, perhaps?”
“no, do me a favor and stay away from the kitchen!” your voice rang out loud and clear, sounding much like a mother scolding a teenager for the thousandth time. “i’ll stab you, do me a favor and just hang out in the living room.”
“okie-dokie!” he responded in an annoying sing-song voice, “come on, peanut, take off your shoes.” the said man could already tell how at home his roommate seemed in this place, just as comfortable as he was back home, walking with steps he’s taken many times before and prompting logan to do the same (except he was mainly keeping to himself and being much more mild-mannered in this unfamiliar area).
the place was as spacious as the small area could be and tastefully decorated, but all sharp corners of furniture were taped over to dull the edges and the carpet had multiple kinds of colorful toys littered about. in the center of it all, was a little toddler about two or three years old, playing with a kitchen set and trying to copy what her mom was doing by running back and forth between the living room and the kitchen. she didn’t even notice the two men at first, not until wade called out her name and she dropped the plastic utensils to clap her hands together before waddling over to him.
“hey, baby! how are you doing? did you miss me?” he cooed in the high-pitched voice reserved only for mary puppins, reaching down to pick up the girl by her underarms and kissing her cheek, spinning around with her in his arms as she giggled uncontrollably. “do you wanna meet the big scary wolverine while i go bother your mommy? who am i kidding, of course you do!” he then dropped her onto the couch, making sure that she didn’t bounce up too high on the cushion and hurt herself. “okay, you keep her company while i go see what’s for dessert— bye!”
before logan could say anything, he was already gone, disappearing around the corner into the sound of sizzling foods and the scent of herbs. pursing his lips together and shuffling his feet around for a second, he grunted and braced himself for the child to start sobbing uncontrollably because she was left alone with him. the first time he meets you, whom he’s heard so many good things about, is going to be when you have to kick him out with his tail in between his legs for disturbing the peace of your home.
but the cries never came, and his eyes met her big curious ones as she just stared up at him in silence. it was honestly a tad bit unnerving like she was sizing him up and carefully thinking about her next move. 
and then she started giggling like earlier, kind of a more gurgling noise of playfulness more than anything, standing at his feet and waving around her short outstretched arms to signal that she wanted uppies from him.
“oh no—“ he’s not sure why he even let out a word or protest to begin with when he knew she wouldn’t listen, but it was pure instinct since, once again, he had no idea how to handle children. although she would probably also start crying if he didn’t listen to her, so he reluctantly bent down to pick her up, holding her close to the side of his chest and nervously awaiting her next move.
she was motionless for a minute with a little hand on her chubby cheek and the other trying to clutch onto the thick leather of his jacket, eyes darting around like she was seeing the world from a new perspective for the first time even though he was a hundred percent certain wade held her like his when they are the same height.
“kitty!”
“what?”
she pointed at the top of his head, his hair tuffs specifically, and reached out to pull on one of them curiously.
“no— not a kitty!” he’s never going to escape that fucking nickname, he wouldn’t be surprised if his roommate taught her to say that before she met him in person, able to perfectly envision wade crouching in front of her with a stupid picture of him on his phone and training her to say “kitty” every time she saw his photo by rewarding her with candy or something since there is no way she associated someone who looks like him to a kitten so quickly unironically.
“no kitty?”
“no— logan, lo-gan.”
she tried to pronounce his name a few times before giving up after getting stuck in the second syllable, blowing a raspberry and going back to what she was doing earlier— finding the most fun in tugging on his cowlicks like she was trying to figure out if he naturally woke up like that with the inability to brush them down or styled them with gel every day.
he sat down on the couch, the cushion sinking under his heavyweight, and sat your daughter down on his lap instead, except she didn’t want to sit down. standing on his lap and pressing her little feet into his thighs, she began to climb onto his shoulder like he was a jungle gym, using his arms as stepping stones to reach her destination while he bent over at the waist to allow her to crawl onto his back without falling behind him.
“you’re like a little lemur,” he muttered, still in slight shock that this kid seemed to like him and wasn’t freaking out like he was the big bad wolf. he wouldn’t admit it, but it was a really nice feeling that gave him a sense of normalcy like he was just some guy rather than the killing machine mutant most knew him as. she wouldn’t stop giggling and holding onto him, which made him feel his ice-cold heart melting like snow by spring’s first touch. 
all the while, he could hear you and wade chatting away in the background: something about him needing to step away from the stove, how you needed to trust him because him starting “that fire” was a one-time thing, what was for dessert, and then taking a sharp turn when the conversation suddenly shifted to the topic of the father.
he felt somewhat guilty about listening in, but he knew that deadpool was going to tell him eventually, so there wasn’t really any harm in a bit of eavesdropping (besides, it would have been difficult to ignore considering that your baby was being very well-behaved and his hearing wouldn’t have been able to pick up on anything else.)
“so… any news about her dad?” the solemn tone of a man who was hardly ever serious a day of his life was more terrifying than anything he’d ever witnessed in his long life.
“... he suddenly wants to be a family man, i guess…”
“what the hell does that even mean?”
the sound of a knife chopping vegetables against a wooden surface slowly came to a stop followed by a sigh. “like he wants to have a family… just not with the one he already started… he’s busy planning his wedding with the girl he cheated on me with and told me not to contact him again for any reason.”
“oh my god, what an asshole! fuck that guy!”
“i can’t believe that was the guy i thought i was going to spend the rest of my life with, could you imagine? i don’t even know what i could have done wrong for him to be like this— i asked him so many times and he just said that he’s ‘fallen out of love,’ has ‘moved on,’ and that i would ‘be cruel’ to ask him to stay even if it was for the sake of our child…”
“well if it’s any comfort, he would have been on the next episode of forensic files the second i got a moment alone with him— i mean, the last time we saw him, he literally pushed his own daughter away when she tried to hug him! what kind of sociopath wouldn’t adore such a cutie patootie, especially his own flesh and blood?! ”
“it’s fine,” you hissed, gritting your teeth at the memory. “it’s not like he’s done anything to deserve getting to be called a father to an angel anyway, i’ll take care of her myself— wait… didn’t i also invite your new roommate? did he not come?”
“no, he’s in the living room, he’s been here this entire time,” he informed, taking a bite out of an apple like an asshole from a film.
“and you didn’t tell me?!!!” you quickly ran into the said area, finding logan and your daughter together on the couch. “hi! oh, i’m so sorry i didn’t come to greet you properly— and left my daughter for you to look after too— god, i’m just a terrible host!” you tilted your head, “what’s your name?”
he then realized he was staring which was rather impolite, mouth slightly agape too like a fish out of water which left a few seconds of awkward silence in between. “i-i’m logan,” he managed to sputter, “nice to meet you..”
wade raised a nonexistent eyebrow at his strange mannerisms before a wide, shit-eating grin split his face. 
“aww, baby, why are you bothering this poor old man— come to mommy, it’s dinnertime,” you clapped your hands and held them out fully expecting her to reach out and grab onto you as she usually does, but instead she looked up at you with big pleading eyes and held onto him even more tightly like a koala clinging to a branch. “oh, did you get attached already? you really are my daughter… logan, could you do me a favor and put her in her high chair while i plate everything?”
“yes, of course.”
you turned back into the kitchen, leaving the two men to follow with one holding your baby in his arms. all it took was one look to understand what he was thinking, logan didn’t need to be a telepath to know. 
“if you don’t shut the fuck up—”
“i didn’t even say anything!”
“good, keep it that way.”
love at first sight, wade has seen it plenty of times and understands it well, something so unpredictable and powerful, that it could bring the wolverine down on his knees. it’s even more potent when he trips over himself seeing you in your natural environment instead of all dressed up for a first date, slightly sweaty from the heat radiating off the stove, unkempt hair sticking to the sides of your face, no makeup or defenses up— just you as yourself to the core.
“alright, bub, let's get you seated…” it took a few tries to get her in because she refused to align her little legs into the holes of the plastic piece, but she eventually got into it just fine and he pulled up his own chair to watch you place a one of the most decadent plates of pasta with chunks of salmon he’s ever seen in front of him with a word of gratitude. 
“sorry it isn’t anything special, i completely forgot that i arranged this in the first place….”
“oh, no, it’s perfect—”
“you’re damn right ‘it’s perfect!’” wade interjected, “lemme tell you, wolvie, this simple plate of pasta is better than sex, i know damn well you’ve never tasted anything like it in all your two-hundred years!”
“well, now that you say it like that, he’s going to have high expectations and it will taste like ass compared to the actual best pasta dish he’s ever had.”
“he likes ass, don’t worry—”
the said man cleared his throat to steer the conversation back around, feeling the foreign sensation of embarrassment burning his face hit him at full force. “it’s delicious, thank you, truly the best i’ve ever tasted.”
“aw, you don’t have to say that.”
“no, he’s right, i think you really outdid yourself this time!”
the dinner was carried by cheerful conversations and fun stories, and despite just meeting you today, logan almost felt like he knew you for years and this was something a commonplace tradition between loved ones which was something he’s been yearning for for as long as he can remember. as he watches you laugh and feed your adorable baby, he can’t help but wonder about the idiotic man who was willing to throw away something so wonderful— something which would complete his life and fill the void in his heart.
“well, you two can hang around while i clean her up and put her to bed. there’s some wine and beer in—” you watched as deadpool had already opened your fridge and was digging around like a raccoon in trash before fishing out two bottles of beers and closing the door with his hips. “alrighty then, i’ll join you two in a bit.”
he watched as you disappeared into the hallway before diving headfirst into the couch next to the wolverine and handing him his beer, kicking his feet and smiling as if he was a middle-schooler at an all girls’ sleepover. “okay, so she has a solid job as an accountant, has her own place and car, is funny and pretty, but most importantly for you, single. she doesn’t like flowers as gifts, but if you gift her groceries or cleaning supplies—”
“she wouldn’t want an asshole like me,” he grunted, taking a sip from the bottle. “not when she just got free from another one.”
“peanut, i met the other guy, you’re infinitely better than him! as much as i would like to keep you to myself, i have already planned out my speech at your wedding as your best man, so just keep in mind that i’m your wingman, okay? don’t lie to me either, i know you have a little crush, and i think she does too—”
“no, she doesn’t.”
“quit cutting me off, you motherfucker!”
it was easier to try and suppress the sprouting seed of infatuation before it bloomed out of control. he didn’t want to hurt you or himself by chasing something that shouldn’t be in the first place. you deserve better, you and your daughter. you both should have someone who was younger and had the energy to be a good father and husband, not some old mutant who was freeloading off of his roommate and terrified of losing more people he cared about. if you knew about the blood on his hands and the claws embedded in them, you would probably be worried that you allowed him to hold your baby and shun him permanently. 
and yet he was already attached, sitting here imagining domestic life where he could see her grow up through the phases of life and help her navigate its complexities while also waking up next to you in his arms and seeing your beautiful smile everyday. 
maybe he won’t let that glimmer of hope die out and just hold onto it for a little while longer, allowing it to leave a little lingering smile on his weary face.
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riveriki · 4 months ago
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Falling for your co-host
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PAIRING… idol!ni-ki x idol!reader | GENRE… fluff, romance | TROPE… idol x idol | WC… 0.7k
You stood nervously backstage at Music Bank, rattling with the script for the show. The bright lights and bustling atmosphere always made your heart race, whenever you and your group had to advertise your new comeback. you'd always find yourself pitying the poor MCs, who have to remember every line by heart, have to learn the dance to every single song, the poor guys have to have the mind of an elephant.
however, today was worse than usual, not because you forgot the lines or a dance move, today was your debut as of the Music Banks MCs, and not only that. You were debuting with the one and only Ni-ki from enhypen.
as you glanced from the side of your eyes, you spotted Ni-ki sitting calmly scrolling through his phone with a monotonous look on his face. curse him for being so nonchalant, while inside you were breaking down.
what if you forget your lines? what if you mess up the group's choreo? what if you talk over their leader? or accidentally say something rude? just as your brain was spiraling into an anxious turmoil, ni-ki gently tapped your shoulder.
"hey, you ready?" he asks as if he noticed your nervousness.
mustering all the confidence you could, you look up at him nodding with a graceful smile. "mhm, just a bit nervous. what about you?"
he chuckled, eyes crinkling at the corners. "I'm okay. don't stress okay? you'll do great, and since we're new they'll have room for forgiveness. so just follow my lead, alright?"
As the show began, you found yourself recalling the lines from memory yet making it sound so natural as if you didn't have a script. as time progressed, you could see yourself falling into a comfortable rhythm with ni-ki. due to his playful energy, harmless banter was tossed every now and then making the members of the group giggle.
between different segments, you found yourself laughing more and more since he would stop spewing out silly jokes, and you couldn't help but feel the warmth growing in your chest.
weeks passed with this chemistry, one that people have never seen on music bank, not chemistry this strong. with every interaction between you two, the edits grew, and fans began to pick out the way he looked at you. whenever he joked around how his eyes would look at yours to see your reaction. how before he would respond he would wait for you to say something first. you couldn't go a day without seeing social be filled with clips of the two of you.
one day, after the show had finished recording, you sat alone in the studio wanting to take a breather before heading back home. Ni-ki was walking around the building looking for you in hopes of potential progression in your relationship.
"hey," he said sweetly before taking a seat beside you. "you were amazing today."
as if you read his mind, you graced him with a smile and a gentle blush on your cheeks. " thanks, ki. you always make it so easy."
he turned to you with a smile, "i'm glad. you know, i really enjoy working with you, there’s no one else i rather have than you to be my partner."
your eyes widened, taken aback by his claim. "actually? awh ki, i thought you were just being nice."
with his eyes boring into yours, he shakes his head. "no, i mean it. whenever'm with you... i feel brighter. it's like you light up the room."
you look away, unable to meet his gaze.
he reaches out, gently taking your hand into his. "look at me will you?"
and within a second your eyes are back on his.
"would you like to spend more time together? outside of work?" he asks with a slight glimmer in his eyes.
"like a date?" you ask with hope.
"yea, like a date."
"i'd love that ki. in complete honesty, i've fallen for you." you say, with your heart pounding.
he grinned, pulling you into his chest, in a tight embrace.
from that day onwards, your bond only deepened. nowadays, you spend most of your nights in each other's dorms cuddling under the covers as a movie plays in the background. either that or late-night convenience store runs. but it's not like you'd have it any other way.
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osamucide · 2 months ago
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⊹ FOR SURE
RELATIVELY STABLE AND TENTATIVELY ABLE TO SAY FOR CERTAIN WHETHER THIS UNCERTAINTY IS FOR SURE
wc: 2k
cw: sad and probably ooc dazai but he’s my husband so i actually know how he falls apart, pretty straightforward references to anxiety+dissociation, references to self harm+suicidal ideation but nothing graphic, angst+hurt/comfort, dazai cries and then you feed him that's all
reid: a little spur of the moment something i started when i wasn’t feeling so hot a bit ago. ethel cain’s cover of this song has altered the course of my life anyway enjoy me projecting
⊹ ⊹ ⊹
He was quiet when he got home, which is uncharacteristic, unless he’s scheming. But there was no glint in his eyes and no menace behind his grin, only exhaustion. What’s more is there was no downcast expression, no particularly sluggish movement to suggest he was upset; granted, he would regularly go on performing his usual persona even if he was upset. He was always all moving puzzle pieces, all thick mask and mystery.
It’s a good thing you’ve learned to read him so plainly.
You owe it to the little shared space you’re in, wrapped in a blanket on the couch, reading a book of his as he shakes his coat off and tosses it across the small dining table with two chairs side-by-side at it instead of across from one another. Dazai usually hangs his coat up on the rack by the door, slips his shoes off mindlessly and comes to flop his entire body weight on top of you, but tonight he pulls his laces undone and leaves his shoes tucked neatly against the wall, walks by the back of the couch to press a ghostly kiss to the crown of your head, and heads straight to the bathroom, which he locks himself in.
You swallow as you hear the shower start. You had specifically picked out an apartment with a standing shower, no tub, when you moved in with him. You’d emptied it of razors a handful of times and you probably would a handful of times more, and you kept all of both of your medication in your bedside table. Still, you can no longer quite focus on the words in front of you.
So, you flick the television on. A little more noise in your brain helps tune out the shower that’s just that—a shower. He showers, most often, because he’s feeling strange and not because he needs to feel clean. Maybe he needs to feel clean, but not in a way that a shower will allow. He does it anyway. You wait.
When the water turns off and he doesn’t immediately bounce out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist, singsonging which leftovers you should heat up for him, you turn the TV volume down a few notches. When it’s been five minutes or so, you find yourself in the kitchen putting day-old bibimbap in the microwave. When it’s been ten, you’re knocking on the door.
"Osamu?" Your voice is soft as your knock. "I waited for you to eat." Dirty trick, you know. But you also know he won’t otherwise; not on a night like this.
You hear a bit of shuffling before the bathroom door creaks open. His eyes are red, his nose flushed, and he’s rubbing his face with the corner of his towel like he’s just awoken from a nap. He’s got no bandages on. He nearly whispers, "You didn’t have to."
"Wanted to." You work the towel from his hands as he turns the light off. He’ll hide behind the darkness if nothing else, but it’s alright; you’ll let him. You pat water from his shoulders before you sling the towel around him like a cape. You whisper back, "I’ll get you clothes. Please get silverware, yes?"
You don’t give him much of a choice, but he’s in a state where he’s pliant enough to listen to corporeal orders. Getting silverware will be a marginally easier task than dressing for him right now.
After pulling a sweatshirt and pair of pajama pants out of your drawers—they’re his, or maybe yours, doesn’t really matter; what does matter is they cover as much skin as possible—you return to him on the couch, two bowls of cooling bibimbap with chopsticks stuck in them on coffee table. He’s got as much of his bare body under the towel as it will allow.
When you set next to him and peel the towel back he looks nearly catatonic. It spurs tears to your lash line, but you hold back. "Arms, please."
He shoves himself into the hoodie, tousling his wet mop of hair in the process, and takes the pants from you, which he stands robotically to step into. When he sits you wrap five fingers across the top of his flannel-clad thigh and press a short kiss to his cheek.
As if sparked by your touch, he curls himself into you.
You’re quick to receive him; you unlock his hands from where they latch behind your neck, gently, like everything else, and you lean back, back, until your head is hitting the pillow you were lounged up against earlier. His fingers scramble for somewhere to land; you will his weight down onto you, his shoulder and hip to tuck beside yours on the inside of the couch, his free arm and leg to sling across your body and his sweet face in the side of your neck. The water from his hair soaks through your shirt. You don’t care. You feel his breath; your fingertips trace circles along his spine, and your outside hand comes to tangle up with his. Eating will have to wait.
You don’t waste time asking if he wants to talk. If he did, he would’ve started by now.
So you focus on his breathing, and how lucky you are to have it ghosting along your collarbone. He’s gray, then white, then gray, then blue in the light of the TV as his thumb moves across the back of your hand, stiff, like it’s just been freed from paralysis.
You wait for his breath to shake; you know it will.
And he knows you know, because he squeezes your hand in a pulsing rhythm like a heartbeat. He hates this. He hates that you've seen him crumble so many times that you know exactly what he needs.
You say it so softly, again, almost a whisper: "I've got you, my love."
He doesn't want you to say it's okay or let it out or talk to me; this is another thing you know very well. He feels like he's floating away from what little sense of self he has to begin with and it's not okay, and he doesn't want to talk about it, he doesn't want to be told when to cry or not, but he does need reminded that you're here, and you're real, and so is he, and so is this thing that both have; you'll grab his ankles and pull him down out of the air. You always do. You always do.
So he cries anyway.
It's like hearing a foreign language leave his mouth. There's something so assured about Dazai even while he believes he's all smoke and mirrors and seeing—hearing—his voice jump between heaving breaths and cracking sobs has always jarred you in some way. Moreover, now that you're so attuned to the way he breaks, it fills you with a tired anger that you can't place on anything concrete. It's a frustration you're glad to shoulder with him, but a frustration no less. You would set fire to everything you could touch, strangle it all to death with your bare hands, if it guaranteed his peace. But you know he wouldn't want that, not anymore; you quell the rage inside you between strands of his hair, fingerpads combing over his scalp with all that anger channeled into love, pure love. For as terrible and rotten as he's convinced he is, he's truly turned you into something softer than you thought yourself capable of being.
You feel his heart racing double-time against yours; you briefly wish you had no chest, no ribs, no physical form to separate you from him, so that your heart could cradle his, give over to his troubled body the time of the breath yours breathes.
He's all jagged edges right now and you're holding him like he's made of cotton. It makes him worse, momentarily, and he tears his hand away from yours; he knows wrapping around you like this, like a boa constrictor around its prey, will make his arms lose feeling but he does it anyway, like he's worried you'll go up in a cloud of dust if he doesn't hold onto you tight enough. He knows it's probably uncomfortable for you, too, laying back on his knotted fingers while he shoves every piece of himself as close as he can get to you, but you don't say anything, don't even make a sound when he hyperventilates into your shoulder and pushes out pathetic whimpers between his stuttering. He knows his face is twisted into that expression he long ago deemed too ugly to look at in the mirror. He gasps like he's underwater, and you just press your cheek to his temple while you lose track of if the wetness on your shoulder is from his hair or his eyes. It doesn't matter. You love him so fucking much.
He weeps against you with his constraint surrendered, loud but muffled by your shirt, at least until whatever movie was on is over. When he finally lifts his head, your eyes flutter open. You hadn't realized you closed them.
You tilt to look at him; the seam of your shirt collar is imprinted into his cheek. His bangs have dried wildly; you push them away from his eyes which are raw with sorrow, and Dazai's hands unclasp from behind you, settling back to how they first were with one curled up into the couch and the other interlaced with yours. He's devastatingly beautiful. You can't help the ghost of the sad smile you wear; it's because he's so gorgeous, and also you want to let him know you're content to be here—not content with what's upset him, not at all, but content to pick him up and help him haul himself forward. He does not reflect the smile back to you. You don't blame him.
"Let's eat." You leave the please unspoken, but it hangs there anyway.
"It's cold," he complains, still distant, but with a glimmer of a pout you think may be him. He's not getting out of it, though.
You sit him up, keep him close to your side and pick up a bowl; it's indeed cold, but you take a bite anyway, as if to show him it's not so bad. When you hold sliced carrot and broccoli to his lips, he looks at you like you're trying to feed him dirt, but opens his mouth anyway.
And it may as well be medicine going down. Not that he particularly cares for reheated and recooled leftover bibimbap, but your fingers being at the other end of the chopsticks makes it appealing. More than appealing. Delightful, even. He never really understood how things like food, music, or art could be healing until he met you and you doodles silly pictures of him on slow Sunday mornings, sang old love songs to him while you shooed him away from the stove as you cooked dinner, fed him leftovers in your shared home, on your shared couch, surrounded by all the things that were both yours and his, sweatshirts, books, blankets, chopsticks alike.
And he tells you that in his own way.
"Heat it up again for me? Please?"
He speaks the plea this time, and you grin—not sad this time, but wholly, as he relights slowly in front of you. And as already established, you'd do anything for him.
"Mhm."
"I love you," he blurts. Tags it on. You stand, gathering both bowls, still grinning.
"I love you." No question about any of it. You press a kiss to the crown of his head. He unfurls the blanket from where you'd slung it over the back of the couch earlier, picking up the remote to flick through the channels, finally breathing steadily as he waits for you to return from the kitchen. Your kitchen, his kitchen. He hears the microwave hum, in another room, not on another planet. He knows he'll be alright.
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thankskenpenders · 7 months ago
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The Knuckles show
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The announcement of a live action Knuckles streaming miniseries was surprising, to say the least. I mean, what would such a show even be about in a version of the Sonic universe with no Angel Island and barely any characters from the games around? Is he gonna go treasure hunting with the gang from Montana or something? Would a streaming miniseries have the CGI budget to squeeze in any new game characters, even briefly? Rouge? Amy? At least one member of Team Chaotix? Anyone?
Now the show is finally out, and it turns out what they actually made was a comedy show about bumbling deputy sheriff Wade Whipple, the minor comic relief character played by Adam Pally who you might not even remember all that well from the first two movies, with Knuckles as his sidekick. While, yes, Knuckles does get a decent amount of screentime and opportunities to punch bad guys and do cool moves from the games, large stretches of this show focus on Wade's personal life, to the point that a couple times I almost forgot I was watching a Sonic-related show. If you're judging it purely by the metric of how well it adapts and engages with its source material, this surely must be one of the worst adaptations the Sonic franchise has ever seen.
So then, despite some huge complaints... why do I kinda like it?
(This will contain full spoilers for the Knuckles show.)
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A brief summary of what the show is actually about because I know half of you aren't going to watch it
The show picks up not too long after the end of the second movie. Knuckles is now living in Montana with Sonic, Tails, and the Wachowskis out of a sense of debt to them, though he doesn't really see it as his home. He doesn't feel like he belongs on Earth, and his life currently lacks direction. After communing with the ghost of Pachacamac, though, Knuckles is instructed to keep his culture alive by teaching "the ways of the echidna warrior" to a new apprentice: deputy sheriff Wade Whipple, who's currently more concerned about winning a bowling tournament in Reno than anything else.
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Things are complicated by the interference of two rogue GUN agents - Agent Willoughby, played by Ellie Taylor in a bad wig, and Agent Mason, played by Kid Cudi. (Yes, the artist behind the second movie's credits song is one of the bad guys in this.) They want to steal Knuckles' power and sell it to a former associate of Robotnik's played by Rory McCann (The Hound from Game of Thrones), who now works as a black market arms dealer. Yes, they're still doing the thing where Sonic and friends' quills radiate some kind of super-energy that the bad guys all want. No, I don't particularly love this element of the Paramount Sonic continuity. Anyway, they go after Knuckles and Wade, complicating their straightforward road trip to Reno. Antics ensue.
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The Wade show
So here's the thing. While the first episode focuses largely on Knuckles, the entire rest of the show is very much the story of Wade, and by extension the other original human characters invented for this miniseries.
Episode 2 is about Wade having to rescue Knuckles from captivity after the GUN agents get him. Knuckles spends most of the episode in a cage.
Episode 3 is about introducing Wade's Jewish family, including his slightly overbearing mother and weird sister, so that Knuckles can learn about their family traditions and have Shabbat dinner with them (and then save them from bounty hunters that the GUN agents hired).
Episode 4 only features Knuckles at the very beginning and very end of the episode, probably for less than a minute total. Wade is captured by a bounty hunter he personally knows, and Knuckles decides to let that be a trial for Wade to overcome on his own.
The last two episodes feature the climactic showdowns with the GUN agents and their arms-dealing ally, who comes in with a mech for the obligatory final boss fight. You'd think this would be Knuckles' time to shine, but really, these episodes are mostly about the bowling tournament in Reno where Wade encounters his estranged father, wrapping up his own personal arc. While Knuckles does get some fights, a lot of the finale is spent on lengthy bowling scenes where Knuckles isn't in the room or even mentioned. It frequently feels more like a spiritual successor to '00s sports comedy movies like Dodgeball, Talladega Nights, or Blades of Glory than it does a part of the Sonic franchise, and the presence of ESPN 8: The Ocho commentary in the finale only drives those Dodgeball comparisons home. They get so immersed in the bowling stuff that it's genuinely hilarious when the show suddenly pivots and remembers "oh shit we still need to do the final boss fight"
Throughout all this, Wade is the protagonist. He's the character we spend more time with, he's the character who drives most of the major events, he's the character who gets more of an arc. The emotional core is Wade's journey. Knuckles is still present - sometimes, at least - but he's there as Wade's wingman, and also just as the excuse for there to be some fight scenes.
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How much Sonic stuff is actually in this show?
Honestly? Not much.
Sonic and Tails are only in the first episode. Sonic gets some good scenes, but Tails gets a grand total of five lines. I counted. Unsurprisingly, Jim Carrey is absent as Robotnik, though he does get mentioned a fair bit. (For that matter, basically the entire established human cast beyond Wade is absent, even including Tom, though Maddie is there in episode one.)
GUN is involved in the story, which helps it feel slightly more connected to Sonic, but it kind of feels like it's GUN in name only. They don't use any recognizable GUN tech, and they don't call in the military. It's just two agents in suits. They might as well be the Men in Black.
The Master Emerald is mentioned as something Knuckles has to guard, but it's never seen. Angel Island is pictured as a drawing during the show's intro, appearing exactly how it does in Sonic 3, but it's never referenced at all beyond that.
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I guess the climax taking place in and around a Reno casino is a reference to Sonic's many casino-themed levels. That's something. I'll give them that.
Oh, and if you're wondering if this is the point where we finally start to get actual music from the games: no, it's not. The soundtrack consists of a lot of '80s needle drops, many of which are generic Hollywood picks like "Holding Out for a Hero" for the billionth time, thought it at least has some slightly less obvious picks than the Mario movie. The theme song is '80s rock song "The Warrior" by Scandal. You'll hear it many times. You'll hear the Adventure era Knuckles raps zero times in this. You'll briefly hear classic A Tribe Called Quest song "Can I Kick It?" before Knuckles takes the question too literally and breaks the radio in Wade's car.
Beyond a handful of surface level references for nerds (one of which is admittedly wild - we'll get to that), this is probably the least an officially licensed adaptation of Sonic the Hedgehog has ever tried to actually engage with its source material. I struggle to think of another Sonic adaptation that has less to do with Sonic. For as much shit as I and countless others have given Penders for seemingly ignoring the content of the games in favor of building his own convoluted mythos, his Knuckles comics honestly included way more elements from the games than this show does.
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Somehow, the one new(-ish) Sonic character introduced in this is the ghost of Pachacamac of all characters. Not even Tikal! Pachacamac! A very minor character nobody has particularly strong feelings about! You can't even use the excuse that they already had the character model, because they completely redesigned him compared to his cameo in the first movie to better match his Sonic Adventure design. And he's voiced by Christopher Lloyd! Honestly, so many of his lines are strained that it sounds like he's on death's door here, but then he'll surprise you with a more casual line like "just do it, man" and it catches me so off guard that I can't help but laugh.
Pachacamac here has basically nothing to do with the game character he takes his name and appearance from. Where the game character was a cruel warlord who kicked off a 3000 year cycle of violence, Paramount Pachacamac is now just this chill old man who gives Knuckles (and later Wade) advice in two episodes of the show. Hell, he also feels completely disconnected from his established role in the movies, where he's literally the guy who shot Longclaw. The show will not grapple with this contradiction at all. He's just here to be a thing fans like me will recognize from the games. Again, if that's all they wanted, it's kind of baffling that they didn't just use Tikal.
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I don't love Knuckles in this
But what about Knuckles himself? Well, he doesn't feel all that much like Knuckles to me. Ironically, he sometimes feels like one of the weaker elements in his own show.
Back when the second movie came out, I noted that Knuckles' characterization seemed to be pulling heavily from MCU Thor as a gallant warrior from an archaic alien culture who doesn't really understand modern day Earth stuff. That worked for me in that movie. It was just there for spice. Just a little extra flavor for the character in what was otherwise a very faithful adaptation of Knuckles' storyline in Sonic 3 & Knuckles. Without those familiar elements grounding him and with a much higher reliance on comedy, Idris Elba's Knuckles becomes a pretty one-note character in this.
In damn near every scene with Knuckles, he's going to say something about being a proud, honorable echidna warrior, or brag about his glorious feats of strength, or be confused about some Earth thing and call it sorcery, or act like every other character is also a member of some noble warrior clan. He still has his moments for sure, but this schtick kinda gets old fast, and it just doesn't feel like Knuckles to me. His entire character feels derived from the scene in the diner where Thor smashes the cup on the ground and goes "Another!" Sure, I can picture game Knuckles smashing a radio to turn it off and being a little too gung-ho about busting holes through walls. That's Knuckles behavior. But building a barbarian combat pit in the living room so the Wachowski family dog can fight the mailman? Nope. That's some other guy now. It really does just feel like them taking a broad character archetype from something popular that kinda sorta fits Knuckles and just running with that, rather than trying to actually adapt the character.
Oh, but don't worry, he wears the OVA hat for like two minutes! AND he loves grapes! See, Sonic nerds? We read the wiki! That's his favorite food! Grapes! This is gonna come up like five times!
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Knuckles kind of gets an arc here, but not as much as Wade does. I think the stuff about him starting to feel at home on Earth thanks to Wade's mom and the way he connects with their Jewish family traditions is oddly sweet. This arc is kind of let down, though, by the fact that Knuckles' heritage is treated as a complete joke. He's a cartoonish pastiche of various historical warrior cultures stuck together in a blender and used mostly for comedic effect. When Pachacamac's ghost appears, he's reading a newspaper and bemoaning the fact that the Mets lost again. This is not the place for a serious examination of Knuckles' feelings on being the last of his kind.
This is far from the only time the show undercuts itself with its jokes and attempts at self-parody. In the first episode, for instance, Knuckles clashes with GUN Agent Mason and his tech-enhanced punches, leading to an extremely on-the-nose inversion of the "Do I look like I need your power?" scene showcased in the trailer for the second movie. Except this time, Agent Willoughby butts in and points out how stupid that line is in this new context, since they're literally trying to steal Knuckles' power. The fight can't just be cool, they have to get cute with it. A lot of stuff like that happens in this show.
Given all these complaints, the first two episodes left me thinking I'd be fairly negative on this show overall. This seemed like the version of the show from the fandom's collective nightmares, one that undoes all of the progress the movie series seemed to have been making towards faithfulness to the games. Like, just look at these cast posters. Is this what you want out of Sonic? Do these excite you?
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But then, something strange happened. Over time, I just kind of let the jokes and shenanigans wash over me and basked in how fucking weird this show is.
And I started to actually enjoy it.
Look. The Wade & Knuckles Show was never going to be peak Sonic. But that sure as hell doesn't mean it can't be entertaining.
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This show is so fucking goofy
Here's the thing.
The show is funny.
Unlike a lot of other people, I didn't hate all the wedding stuff in Hawaii in Sonic 2, because I thought a lot of it was funny, both in its actual jokes and in the ways in which they tied everything back to Sonic. Tom looking wistfully at some bodybuilders doing Top Gun shit and spraying each other with beer and being like "I wish Sonic had that" is weirdly funny. The twist that those muscle bros are all agents of the newly formed GUN, who orchestrated the wedding as an elaborate scheme to catch Sonic, is funny. Mr. Olive Garden becoming the fucking GUN Commander is VERY funny. Are any of these elements of my dream Sonic movie? No, of course not. But my dream Sonic movie was never gonna happen in live action.
The Knuckles show follows up on the comedy of the previous films by being probably the funniest live action Sonic release yet. Did every joke land for me? God no. There are some stinkers in there that made me roll my eyes. But enough of them landed that it worked out for me overall. A big part of this is the fact that they've got a good cast of actors and/or comedians here.
Adam Pally is funny as Wade, and I found myself liking him more and more as a character as the show went on. He becomes an oddly endearing loser, with some sweet moments in his personal arc that made me feel for the guy. I like Wade more than Tom now, thanks to this show. I will now be happier to see Wade in Sonic 3 than I would have been previously.
The supporting cast is frequently great, too, many of whom are playing completely cartoonish, over-the-top characters. They took a cue from how exaggerated Carrey's performance was as Robotnik and decided to just abandon all pretense that this is the real world. Stockard Channing as Wade's mom is funny, and carries some of the more sincere parts of the show. Cary Elwes as Wade's very British dad who abandoned him as a child to run off and be the world's most egotistical professional bowler is funny. Edi Patterson as Wade's sister Wanda is... well, she's kinda trying too hard, but she has her moments. The Mighty Boosh co-creator Julian Barratt(!!) as a scenery-chewing bounty hunter, who was also somehow Wade's former best friend and bowling partner, is VERY funny. I love this guy.
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(Honestly, they should let more people who were on Garth Marenghi's Darkplace be in Sonic stuff. Where's Matt Berry)
This is kind of a stacked cast for a bunch of stupid side characters in a live action Knuckles show! And honestly, that just makes it funnier to me. Even when they're not funny, the fact that this exists makes it funny. They somehow convinced Paramount to give them a bunch of money to make a spiritual successor to Dodgeball about a schlubby guy who wants to beat his dad at a bowling tournament... except also Knuckles the fucking Echidna is there as his personal life coach. My life is richer for the fact that I can say that sentence. I think about all the little kids who are probably watching this show this weekend, going in expecting a show about Knuckles the Echidna and having to sit through extensive bowling scenes and lore about Wade's family, and sorry kids, but I just have to laugh. Wade isn't even on the poster! The poster is just a picture of Knuckles!! They punked those kids!!!
In a franchise where every single aspect is so carefully micromanaged these days, it feels truly special to get an adaptation this bonkers. It frequently appeals to the same part of me that enjoys the fact that there's an officially licensed Knuckles comic in which Charmy Bee's best friend (also a bee) dies of an accidental LSD overdose from a drug-laced chili dog. Or like, everything about the original 1993 Super Mario Bros. movie. Or the fact that they made seven direct-to-DVD sequels to Alpha and Omega, one of which is half a retread of the adventure from the first movie (with more annoying supporting characters in tow this time) and half a literal clip show of the first movie. The sheer absurdity of the fact that these things exist is charming to me. Except, with the Knuckles show, it has the added benefit of frequently being funny on purpose! This is why I'm not sure I'd call it "so bad it's good." Like, it's not amazing, but there were a lot of parts that I enjoyed in the exact way I was supposed to enjoy them.
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Look. Here's a list of real lines of dialogue from the Sega-approved Knuckles the Echidna streaming show that they're billing as a pillar of the Paramount+ lineup, to drive this point home. Let these marinate for a minute:
"I only eat grapes, and Cool Ranch Doritos™."
"Annihilate this little girl, Wade. Crush her spirit. Humiliate her so badly her parents won't even look at her again." "Doesn't that seem like we're going a bit far?" "Not far enough."
"So is he Jewish?" "Half, I think."
"I had a friend who when he listened to Alien Ant Farm he could lift a Toyota Corolla over his head."
"I'm in dire financial straits. Due to my lawsuit against an unnamed rainforest-themed restaurant franchise, I don't have two pennies to my name."
"We're here in sunny Reno, Nevada, which is so close to Hell you can smell the sparks."
"You can't threaten me with your Jewish karate chops because I am a federal agent."
"I will say, regardless of how you feel about child abandonment - and I'm against it! - the deals at TJ Maxx can't be beat."
This is a Sonic show in which they got Paul Scheer and Rob Huebel to appear as ESPN 8: The Ocho commentators.
This is a show where Wade's mom insists upon pronouncing "Knuckles" with the throaty Hebrew "ch" sound, and declares that Knuckles is basically Jewish. Later, they watch Pretty Woman together while enjoying a nice slice of key lime pie. Knuckles comments: "I don't understand. This young streetwalker with a heart made of gold, why do the others treat her with such disdain? Is it so wrong to walk the streets?"
This is a show where the fourth episode is directed by one of the guys from The Lonely Island and features a hallucinatory low budget rock opera stage musical put on by the ghost of Pachacamac. It recounts Knuckles' life story, with Wade playing Knuckles and the "evil" Longclaw played by the bounty hunter guy who's played by the Mighty Boosh guy.
Look at this.
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And also, Knuckles' singing voice is provided by Michael Bolton, which they proudly announce in the middle of the musical.
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And also...
Also...???
IBLIS IS IN IT????????????
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Yes, Iblis!
From Sonic '06!!
Knuckles is said to have looked for a mythical power called the "Flames of Disaster" to avenge his clan, which ended up being the power that was within him all along that lets him do fire punches yadda yadda yadda. As part of this, he apparently fought Iblis off-screen at some point, as conveyed with the giant singing papier-mâché Iblis in the musical.
...Then Iblis sings about hitting up Facebook Marketplace
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How? How does any of this exist? Why reference '06 of all games? How did Iblis get into the live action Sonic movie universe before Amy and Metal Sonic? Why are they using Iblis and the term "Flames of Disaster" in such a goofy way that completely disregards their original context?
I don't know. I don't know how any of this happened. But I love it. We got a Knuckles miniseries in which Michael Bolton sings the phrase "the Flames of Disaster." The world is a beautiful place sometimes.
Some people will tell you to skip episode four. "Knuckles is barely even in it," they say. "It's dumb and pointless," they say. "They clearly just ran out of special effects budget," they say. These are people whose opinions you should disregard. The episode with the least Knuckles in it is somehow the most entertaining episode of the show. I would, in fact, go as far as to say that if you only decide to watch one episode of the Knuckles show to see what goofy bullshit they get up to, it should be this one.
I cannot be mad at this show. It's so dumb, but it completely owns the fact that it's a dumb and unnecessary spinoff. Inferiority is baked into its very DNA. It's very self-consciously redoing the premise of the first movie, but stupider. It's about The Other Cop from the movies, instead of the competent one. Instead of being into a "cooler" sport, his life revolves around professional bowling. Instead of going to Vegas, he goes to Reno. Even his tragic backstory that shaped his entire life sucks. He was abandoned by his pro bowler dad in a TJ Maxx. Not even a nicer department store. A fucking TJ Maxx. This whole show is a Dril tweet.
They put a ton of effort into making it dumb in an occasionally spectacular way. So much effort was put into that joke rock opera that fans will just write off as stupid filler. They put their whole pussies into it. This is not a poorly made show. This has better production values than half the shit made for Disney+. This was made with love. Maybe not as much love for the Sonic the Hedgehog series of video games as we'd like, but it's love nonetheless.
Maybe this show broke me and these are the ramblings of a madwoman. Maybe I'm just really nostalgic for the '90s and '00s comedy movies all the Wade stuff is modeled after. Maybe the Alan Wake fan in me just really loves it when a story pivots to a silly rock opera for no real reason. I won't discount any of these possibilities. This isn't high art. This isn't something I would recommend to anyone with zero interest in Sonic, and it also isn't going to sway Sonic fans who hate the Paramount universe. I really can't blame them for being bewildered by this show. But for a specific type of person, this is the absurd three-star Sonic-adjacent comedy miniseries of your dreams. It's a mid masterpiece.
Again, I just have to step back, realize the fact that this shouldn't exist, and smile. Sega's too afraid to do stupid bullshit with the franchise like this these days. And I can't blame them, after years of Sonic being a treated as a laughingstock. But part of me misses some of the goofy shit. No matter how much I tore some of the Archie comics apart as I was reading them for this blog, I just look back on stuff like Cal and Al or the Many Hands issues and laugh. And that same part of me looks at this show about Knuckles being the sidekick to this fucking guy, and just goes...
"We're so back."
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In conclusion, I genuinely think this was a more enjoyable TV show than Sonic Prime.
I wouldn't go back and rewatch Sonic Prime anytime soon, aside from maybe, like, a couple of the Shadow-heavy episodes. Huge stretches of that show bored me to tears. The writers squandered all of that show's potential. But I would rewatch the Knuckles show, which takes a terrible premise and has a lot of fun with it, in a heartbeat. Even the bowling parts. The bowling scenes in the Knuckles show are more engaging than 70% of the fights in Sonic Prime. I am not trolling. I mean that sincerely, with all my heart. Don't @ me.
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Stray observations
There is effectively zero meaningful setup for the third movie in this, unless Wade's family or the two GUN agents come back or something. Project Shadow is not mentioned in this. There is no secret post-credits scene with Gerald
The CGI in this is pretty good. Not quite on par with the movies, but pretty good. Sonic's weird forehead wrinkles are distracting in his scenes though. Please fix that
I wouldn't say I liked this as much as the second movie, which obviously gets a ton of points for, you know. The Cool Sonic Shit. But I had more fun with it than the first movie, which I still feel is a painfully generic family movie that was only saved by Tyson's redesign
"Grapes are an interesting choice for someone who doesn't use his individual fingers."
Agent Willoughby was apparently the one at GUN who had to buy the Olive Garden gift cards and set up the fake wedding. Her origin story is that she hated doing shit like that and wanted to go fight aliens
This miniseries contains another Keanu namedrop because Wade's childhood bedroom has a Speed poster on the wall. I swear, if Sonic doesn't say Shadow sounds just like Keanu...
Knuckles is familiar with Paul Blart Mall Cop
Near the end the ESPN 8: The Ocho commentators say that the 1974 Reno bowling championship was also interrupted by an extraterrestrial, and given that was exactly 50 years ago I can't write off the possibility that that was Shadow. Please for the love of god give us a sequel series after the third movie where Wade takes Shadow the Hedgehog bowling. I need this more than I need air
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writteninlunarlight-years · 29 days ago
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How they show affection to you throughout the relationship TW: AFAB Reader, Sexual implications, Cringey men, MY SHITTY ASS WRITERS BLOCK
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Lucifer
In the beginning, your story together was anything but perfect. He held unyeilding views about sinners, and in his eyes, you were nothing more than a psychopathic killer, a hopeless drug addict, or even, heaven forbid, a demonic radio host.
Yet somehow, you brought joy into his life. Your corny puns and lighthearted jokes became the new normal for his troubled soul. You consistently put him first, even when you didn’t have to, your calm, gentle smile illuminating the darkest corners of his small world.
It truly began with the small gestures—special nicknames that he lovingly crafted just for you. One fateful day, he became visibly upset when Charlie dared to use the same nickname. He sulked for days, unable to shake off the irritation that someone else had used his personal nickname he made just for you.
As your connection deepened, he began expressing his feelings through lingering touches. Afraid to voice the vastness of his emotions, he sought to convey his affection subtly. He would hold your hand a fraction too long during exchanges, his fingers brushing against yours with a hesitant familiarity. When he tucked a stray hair behind your ear, his fingers lingered against your skin just a moment longer. He would pull you close, his hand resting possessively around your waist, silently claiming you as his own.
Eventually, the weight of his unspoken feelings became too much to bear. He opted for indirect confessions, praising your beauty and grace instead of uttering the words "I love you," which once led to heartache. He swept you off your feet, whether in a playful dance or as you strolled through the infernal streets of Hell, reveling in the joy of simply being together.
The moment of true confession came unexpectedly while Kattie Killjoy was out on the road with her camera crew. She stopped you both, curious about the new sinner who had captured King Lucifer's attention. Without a moment’s hesitation, he pulled you into a passionate kiss, declaring to the Hell's rings that you were his.
That kiss sparked a meaningful conversation about the future of your relationship and the love that had been quietly brewing between you for so long. From that moment, Lucifer began guiding you, helping you find your footing as Hell's next queen, all the while cherishing the fact that you chose to stand by his side.
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Alastor
He didn’t hate you; instead, he regarded you as a mere plaything—a soul eager to make a deal, much like countless others before you. To him, people were simply pawns in a grand game, assets he could exploit over time. Yet, he never anticipated the profound impact you would have on his life.
Your calm presence was soothing, like the perfect Jazz song on a long night. You found joy in learning about his past, willingly immersing yourself in the world of Jazz, and becoming an enthusiastic participant. It warmed his heart to know he had at least one dedicated listener who wasn’t bound to him by ownership.
He couldn’t help but notice the way your hands lingered near him, a delicate dance of respect and curiosity. Your decision to take up dancing lessons at Mimzy’s work didn’t go unnoticed either. He appreciated your efforts far more than he would ever admit, silently cherishing the way you sought to connect with him.
It quickly became apparent to everyone in Hell—save for the two of you—that something special was blossoming between you. Your every move was shadowed by a newfound intimacy, and Alastor always seemed prepared with an extra outfit for dancing, making it almost too easy for others to see the affection that was growing between you.
Alastor, recognizing your hesitation to risk hurting him, decided to take the plunge and make the first move. He whisked you away to Mimzy’s dance hall, where you spent the night twirling and swaying together. While dancing was not unusual for you two, it was during the slow songs that he drew you impossibly close, enveloping you in a warmth that felt both exhilarating and terrifying.
The truth of your shared feelings came to light when Rosie danced by and playfully remarked on how cute and deadly the two of you appeared together. With a broad smile illuminating his face, Alastor looked down at you, and before you could process the moment, he captured your lips in a searing kiss.
This kiss ignited a whirlwind of chaos around you—a symphony of Mimzy’s complaints, Rosie’s laughter, and the distant hum of TV static as carnage erupted in the streets, instigated by an irate man who had glimpsed a glitchy, blurry photo of your exchange. Although the man who snapped the picture met a swift end, the image ultimately found its way into Vox’s hands, setting off a chain reaction of consequences.
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Adam
He was the first man, the quintessential figure, the one and only Adam of the Garden of Eden. With an aura of irresistible charm, he dismissed the notion of singular love or romance, believing he needed a multitude of women to satisfy his desires. Sweet, innocent feelings had no place in his world—at least, that’s what he thought.
Little did he know, you were slowly weaving your way into the fabric of his heart. You were the epitome of a perfect angel, obedient and charmingly polite. Initially, he found your demeanor a tad annoying, but as night fell, his imagination transformed you into the devoted wife he never knew he craved.
Over time, his nicknames for you evolved from crude jests to tender pet names, each one reserved solely for you. If anyone dared to inquire about this softer side, he would scoff, brushing it off as if it never happened. The same went for the fleeting touches—his instinct to stand closely behind you, resting his head on yours or your shoulder—he would never confess to being utterly smitten.
His feelings became undeniable when even the mere mention of Eve or Lilith in your presence ignited a fierce jealousy within him. He yearned to shout from the rooftops that you were the one—the "it girl" who had captured his heart. You were his forever, the beginning and the end.
To solidify these feelings and coax you into his embrace, he made it his mission to cling to you, undeterred by gossip or judgment. He wanted you to know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that his devotion to you matched yours to him.
The pivotal moment that brought your lips together was orchestrated by Lute, who quite literally pushed you into Adam. Just as he was grappling with cold feet, he found himself frozen in place, your wide, sparkling eyes locked on his. In a whirlwind of surprise, Lute nudged you forward, and as he instinctively caught you, one hand on your lower back and the other tangling in your hair, he realized your hands were resting on his chest. In that electric moment, your lips met, sealing a connection neither of you anticipated.
From that day forward, Lute took immense pride in her matchmaking skills. Whenever Adam wasn’t around, she reveled in bragging about how she had transformed the notorious “massive asshole” into a devoted boyfriend, silencing his incessant boasts about his past conquests. This victory was a personal triumph for her and a welcome relief for the other exorcists, who were finally spared from his relentless chatter about your perfect form.
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Husk
He had never been on the lookout for love—not even before his untimely demise. To him, it felt like a distant fantasy, something lost in the chaos of his life. As a gambling man with a penchant for risk, he often found that women were put off by his reckless ways and his struggle with alcohol.
But then you entered his life, and it took far too long for him to realize that his drinking had lessened, replaced by an increasing fascination with you. You became his unexpected remedy, igniting an obsession with your radiant smile and infectious laughter. Your genuine spirit shone brightly, even when the world felt heavy and overwhelming.
He transformed your drinks into special concoctions, always incorporating your favorites—whether they were alcoholic or not. Each glass was adorned with playful fruits and whimsical garnishes aimed at coaxing your smile.
One day, he casually suggested that you help him clean the bar, seizing the opportunity to brush his fingers against your lower back or hold your hands, delighting in the warmth of your presence.
He longed to take a step toward something more official, but with Charlie’s exuberance and Alastor’s unpredictable nature, commitment felt daunting. Yet, it was clear to everyone in the hotel how deeply he cherished you. Encouraged by their nudges, he finally gathered the courage to ask you out, only to stumble over his words and blurt out a clumsy, unrelated question that only made you smile wider.
Determined to make his intentions clear, he devised a plan to ask you out on his own terms. He orchestrated a lovely meal and implored everyone in the hotel to vacate for the afternoon. Once the scene was set, everything fell into place. Your laughter at his classy magic tricks and the sweet rhythm of your conversation made him realize—this was love blooming in its purest form.
When he finally confessed, he was beaming—a remarkable feat for someone who rarely wore a smile. Your genuine warmth and unwavering affection were all that mattered to him, melting away his grumpy exterior.
From that moment on, Husk transformed into a new man. He found purpose in his days, a reason to look forward to the end of his shifts. Yes, the looming presence of the radio demon still weighed on his mind, but you were there, ready to fill the void in his heart with everything he had always longed for.
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Vox
You were nothing more than an assistant in his eyes—just a cog in the machine while he juggled the chaotic dynamics of his half-hearted relationship with Val and Vel. Love felt like a distraction; all he craved was power and the sweet satisfaction of seeing Alastor kneeling before him.
Yet, you were an infuriating thorn in his side, clad in alluring short skirts and stockings, flashing a smile that could light up the darkest corners of Hell. Each comment from Val or Vel about you ignited a possessive spark within him. He wanted you all to himself, and he was determined to keep it that way.
The nature of your interactions began to change, starting innocently with the passing of papers or showcasing new products on the tablet. But it quickly escalated to lingering touches—his hands resting possessively on your waist, gentle massages on your shoulders, and teasing breaths against your neck as he leaned in to whisper.
He was intent on making you want him, but pride held him back from crawling to you; that would be too undignified. Instead, he resolved to ensure you needed him just as much. One promise rang clear in his mind: he would never, ever use his hypnosis against you.
His feelings became undeniable the day Val cornered you, a tense moment exacerbated by his foul mood, thanks to Angel Dust’s antics and the fact that you had captured Vox's attention. What began as a heated conversation erupted into a full-blown brawl between the two men, both vying for your affection in one way or another.
When Vox emerged victorious, albeit with a few scrapes, he was seething. But the moment you approached him, your worried eyes searching his, everything shifted. In that instant, he realized you were the one—the only one he would ever need. Forget Alastor on his knees; it was you he craved at his side.
With one passionate kiss, he made his feelings clear, giving Val a defiant middle finger as you and Vox ignited headlines across Hell with your new love story. He would do anything for you—truly anything—and he meant every word.
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whiskersz · 9 months ago
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Hello all, I wanted to dedicate some time to writing some self indulgent stuff, so here's some Adam dating HCs! Do tell me if you'd like more ^o^ Also I'm trying to play around with the format of my posts.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Adam x Reader - Dating Headcanons
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✦ Adam undoubtedly has a soft spot for you; from refraining to call you distasteful nicknames to trusting you to preen his wings, many are the ways in which he demonstrates that you’re special to him, not just another Angel. You’re one of the few souls who willingly shows him kindness after all, so how could he ignore that? Despite acting like a jerk most of the time, he really can’t bring himself to be that way around you.
✦ To get someone like him to fully respect you takes a lot of time and patience; just ignoring his unpleasant comments and jokes alone won’t do, you’ll sometimes have to retort with a joke of your own, or even laugh at them. If you do it’ll boost his confidence stratospherically, it’ll make him full on puff up his chest and give one strong flap of his wings to hear you laugh at something he just said.
✦ Something that I also mentioned in another one of my headcanons posts is that he loves naps; he’s a pretty lazy guy in general, so between meetings and training he’ll surely want to relax, even better if he gets to do that with you. He likes lying on his couch with you wrapped up in his arms and wings - bonus point if you’re peacefully sleeping – with his TV playing in the background. If you’re in bed though, expect him to move around a lot as he does so unconsciously in his sleep, unless he’s holding you...in which case his arms will practically trap you and you won’t be able to leave without waking him up.
✦ Another thing he quite enjoys doing with you is playing videogames, just to chill a bit together, and if drinking was allowed in Heaven I feel like he would be the type to play drinking games. He surprisingly doesn't need much to have fun, even in the house.
✦ Adam loves eating ribs, but he can’t cook for shit. He’ll always order those or takeout on a daily basis, so you decide that it’s a good idea to teach him at least the basics. He’s very clumsy in the kitchen, doesn’t really understand how most things work but hey, at least he can tell when the water’s boiling! So teaching him how to cook his own ribs is a bit of a process, but eventually he learns and takes pride in knowing how to make his favorite dish on his own. Give it some time and he’ll be parading around and telling anyone who asks about how his ribs are way better than the ones you can get at a restaurant.
✦ Speaking of food, he’ll almost always take you somewhere to eat if you’re on a date. Even if you’re just getting fries from some stall on the side of the street, he’ll make sure you’ve gotten a treat at the end of the day.
✦ He’s a big show off too, so he’ll 100% propose you to try playing guitar only to exhibit his own skills. If you compliment him enough and you appear to be genuinely interested in learning though, he will gladly be your teacher. He will show you how to play the songs he likes them most – his own – and reward you with a ‘You rock, babe!’ or something along those lines and a kiss whenever you get something right. He’s really, really proud of you and of being able to teach you something.
✦ Adam loves casually calling you pet names. He won’t use extremely cheesy ones, but things like babe/baby, sexy and hon. He’ll use them in sentences where they don’t even really belong, even, just because he’s willing  to show you this sweet side of him that nobody else gets to witness. The one thing he will never call you is shortened versions of your name; he finds those extremely corny.
✦ He’s also not really afraid of showing his love in public, PDA is very much his thing when you two are together. Hand holding, a wing draped across your back, an arm around your shoulder...careful not to do too much though, he’s not really a fan of kissing in public or anything on the more intimate side like that. If this happens he won’t deny you a kiss or a hug but you’ll have to deal with his attitude for a while.
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lomlhwa · 14 days ago
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intern (ot8) [volume three]
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pairing: free use intern!reader x office workers!ateez
preview: getting this type of job feels so wrong. but you need money and hey, they're all hot.
tags/warnings: fem!reader, free use, perv!ateez, monster cocks for all of ateez i fear, it's pretty much all dom!ateez but woosan do like to beg to cum so do with that what you will, ties as restraints, hair pulling, spit kink, spanking (with hands and belts), degrading, praise, pet names (slut, whore, cumdump, doll, baby, princess), throat/stomach bulge, sometimes it's one at a time and sometimes it's five, voyeurism, hand jobs, oral (f+m receiving), vibrator torture, crying, anal, two cocks in one hole who cheered, so many creampies [these are general tags for all parts, not all of these will be in every part]
trigger warnings: if i forgot tags, don't kill me
wc: 3.0k
song recs for this fic: moonstruck by enhypen
a/n: woosan girlies be gentle when knocking my door down
previous - next
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san carries you out of the lunch room, strutting straight over to your desk. he acts like your weight is nothing more than that of a cat who has decided to sit on his shoulder. he plops you down onto your comfy office chair (the one you had yet to sit in) and you land with a small “hmf.” you look up at san as he admires you, running his tongue over his teeth. wooyoung appears suddenly behind you, basically breathing down your neck. “don’t get too comfy, princess. i think san has something fun planned for you,” he looks up at san with a mischievous look, lust dripping from his smile. 
you have gone through so many different positions in one day that honestly, nothing would surprise you anymore. well, except the fact that you’re learning right now that your chair reclines all the way back like a bed. san drops to his knees and places your legs on his shoulders. he shoves your skirt up so it rests on your waist all bunched up. wooyoung grabs your chin and forces you to look at him towering over you. “sannie is gonna eat your pretty pussy until you can’t remember what day it is. i’m gonna fill your tight throat to the brim until you forget your name. how does that sound?” you don’t even know how to respond to such dirty words leaving such a pretty mouth.
“your speechlessness is full of excitement, so i’m gonna just assume you’re dripping right now. is that about right, san?” wooyoung asks, leaning over to try and catch a glimpse of your sopping core. san groans, drinking in the way that your body twitches. “i’ll take that as a yes. do you wanna know what else we’re gonna do to you?” wooyoung says as san connects his tongue to the skin of your inner thigh. you shudder and nod, wooyoung’s grin growing wider. 
“we’re gonna get you on the floor and get you spread wide open,” san says as he trails his tongue higher. “san’s gonna fill you up with his fat cock that has been begging for your hole all day,” wooyoung adds in a whiny tone as san kisses your other thigh, and you whimper. “and i’m gonna reward you with extra stimulation by treating your puffy clit like a lollipop.” wooyoung concludes as san finally connects his tongue to your core and your whole body jerks. your hands race to grab something, or rather someone, since you ended up gripping wooyoung’s thighs like a vice. 
wooyoung looks down at you with fake pity before wrestling with his belt and dress pants. he drops them to the floor and smirks at you. “open wide, make me feel good like a well behaved whore,” he demands. you obey immediately, your throat welcoming him as he slides past your lips. your head upside down makes for a smooth entrance for wooyoung’s long cock. he lets out a small whine as he watches the bulge of his dick appear in your throat. he gets harder, if possible, watching the bulge move in and out. “o-oh fuck, it’s like your throat was m-made for my cock,” wooyoung’s whole body shakes slightly in reaction. “wooyo, you’re so talkative today,” you hear from a deep voice across the room. mingi. this is the first time you’ve ever heard him speak. 
wooyoung chuckles at his comment. “judging by the way her hips jerk every time i open my mouth, i think she prefers a talkative man. don’t you, my little cumdump?” you attempt at garbling a small ‘yes’ in response but wooyoung is completely blocking your airway. “fair enough. what the whore wants, the whore gets,” mingi replies before going back to typing away at his desk. wooyoung leans down a little to wrap both hands around your throat to feel the way the bulge moves. san and wooyoung act in sync; wooyoung pushes into your throat and san licks a stripe up your core. the whole ordeal is positively mind-numbing. 
san dips his middle and ring fingers into your wet heat, scissoring them to spread you out. you roll your eyes back and cough around wooyoung, your legs beginning to shake. wooyoung whines and whimpers as he uses your throat, catching his lip between his teeth and looking at you with teary eyes. “ah fuck, san, i’m gonna cum,” wooyoung announces and san pulls away from your core to glare at him. “if she can hold it when instructed, so can you. you’re not done until i say you are. the pretty baby gets to cum before you do,” san says in a firm tone. you hear a high pitched whimper leave wooyoung’s throat as his cock twitches in your throat. you can feel just how close to his peak he is and you really can’t tell if he’s gonna be able to hold it. 
san reconnects his mouth to your core and devours you like you’re the last meal he’s ever going to have. your legs shake and spasm around his head, encouraging him to bring you closer to the edge. your back arches as san adds a third finger into your core, digging at the gummy spot inside you. you move your hands from wooyoung’s thighs to san’s hair. your fingers wrap around his black locks, pulling his head further between your legs. you hear a low chuckle from san as your movements become more desperate, rutting your hips against his face to get more friction. 
“san, fuck, i seriously c-can’t hold it much longer,” wooyoung says again. he had stopped abusing your throat and had begun slowly rocking his hips back and forth to try and savour his close orgasm building. you give san’s hair a harsh tug to tell him you’re about to cum and he gives you a nod. “i can’t deny the pretty girl anymore. i want both of you to cum,” san says in a demanding tone. you whole body fills with lighting as you reach your orgasm, pleasure making your vision go white. wooyoung fills your throat at almost the exact same moment, causing you to cough up a mix of semen and saliva. 
wooyoung pulls out of your mouth and san pulls your head by your neck to kiss you. the saliva swapped between you is full of a mix of your release and wooyoung’s. san lifts you up off your chair and places you on all fours, your knees still sore from being like this for yeosang and jongho. you feel wooyoung run his fingers over your slit, collecting remnants of your release, before bringing his fingers to his mouth and sucking them clean. “god, you taste like heaven. i could eat you forever,” he comments as your whole body shudders. you hear the sound of san’s pants and belt hitting the floor, signaling to you that you’re not going to be empty for much longer. 
wooyoung grabs your chin and tilts your head to make you look at him. his hair falls over his eyes and sticks to his face so beautifully that even just his gaze has you clenching. “you remember what i said we’d do?” he asks, and you nod expectantly. “good girl. i’m gonna leave you alone with san for a bit so he can really enjoy you. i promise i’ll come back soon,” he says before kissing your forehead and wandering away. where the hell was he going? you had no time to consider options before san used one hand to spread you open and align the tip of his cock with your entrance.
you gasp at the sudden contact, turning slightly to stare at him. he had completely unbuttoned his white dress shirt, leaving his defined muscle completely exposed. parts of his shirt were becoming see-through from the sweat dripping down his body. his arms flexed as one hand gripped your waist and the other guided his cock into you. his eyelashes fluttered and his face contorted into the most blissful look as he bottomed out. his appearance alone was making you clench around him like a vice.
you lower yourself down from your hands onto your elbows, arching your back even more. san ghosts his fingers down your spine, goosebumps appearing in his wake. he enjoys the feeling of you clenching and unclenching around him for a while before pulling out to the tip and slamming back in. his actions send your whole body jolting forward, your eyes rolling back into your head. your fingers scratch at the floor, trying to find something to grip onto, and finding nothing. 
san starts slowly grinding into you, his strokes slow and deep. the feeling is mind-numbing. you can feel every inch of him rubbing against the sweetest part of you. you hear some shuffling behind you and you turn your head to find that san has completely taken his shirt off, his honey golden skin covered in a sheen of sweat. he has discarded his shirt a few feet away, his focus returning to you. he places both hands on your waist, pulling your hips to his in tandem with his thrusts. 
“you're too quiet, make some pretty noises, my angel,” san demands, landing a harsh smack to your ass. you squeal, your body shuddering. “there you go. so fucking beautiful.” he begins to thrust more intensely, more sounds leaving your throat. he was so far in you that you were convinced he was kissing your cervix. 
you reach one arm behind you to grip his forearm, your nails digging into the harshly flexed muscle. “looks like someone's enjoying herself,” you hear wooyoung finally speak. he had finally returned from god knows where. wooyoung sits cross-legged on the floor in front of you, lifting your head to look at him. he leans down to kiss you, passion and aggression filling his movements. you bite and suck on his bottom lip as his tongue darts out to catch yours.
he tangles his hand in your hair, pulling your head to follow his movements. he whines against your mouth, his cock throbbing in his pants. wooyoung pulls away from your mouth, his eyes darting up to look at san. “san, do you think she's earned what i promised?” you look back at san in a frenzy, your eyes begging him to say yes. you'd been well behaved and done everything he wanted. san smiles at you, his perfect eyes disappearing into crescents.
“i think she deserves it. she's been such a good fucking girl, haven't you sweetheart?” san taunts you, leaning over you to stroke your hair. you nod excitedly, raising yourself back onto your palms so wooyoung could slide under you. wooyoung’s pupils are blown as he watches you get ready for him. “oh, so eager. what a dirty girl,” he drops to the floor and lays on his back before sliding underneath you. he comes face to face with your already filled core, a soft moan leaving his mouth at the sight. 
san begins his slow movements in and out of you once again, your arms already shaking from holding yourself up. wooyoung runs his hands up your thighs, and you shudder at the feeling. he ghosts his fingers over your clit, his fingers brushing san’s cock as it moves inside of you. “i’ve never seen anything more beautiful than you being pleasured, slut,” wooyoung comments as he sinks his teeth into the flesh of your thigh. you squeal, the surge of pain that shoots through your body shocking you a little. “the bulge of san’s cock in your stomach could make me cum just looking at it,” he runs his hand over the part of your stomach that is protruding, san lets out a shaky breath behind you. “fuck, don’t talk about it, i’ll cum.”
wooyoung slowly moves his mouth from the skin of your inner thigh towards your core. he gives your clit kitten licks, your jaw falling open in a silent moan. san speeds up his thrusts, drawing your hips back against his to match his pace. wooyoung wraps his pretty, puffy lips around your clit, sucking on it. wooyoung moves his hands to your waist, holding your body up for you. “come on baby, you know you want my cock back in your mouth,” wooyoung pulls away from your core and waits for you to do what he wants. 
your hands fiddle with the button on his pants, pulling at them urgently once you get it open. he lifts his hips off the floor so you can help him tug his clothes off. you get them off just enough to get access to his leaking cock, wrapping your hands around it immediately. your hands move quickly, wooyoung whining under you. “s-slow down, it’s s-still sensitive,” he whines, you ignore his comment. his hips buck up into your hands, seeking more pleasure despite his pleas for you to slow down. he matches your energy by wrapping his lips around your clit again, sucking and licking at it with intense vigor.
wooyoung wraps hair arms around your hips, holding onto you for dear life. “wooyo, i need to fuck her harder,” san says, sounding out of breath. “she’s a slut, so we have to treat her as such.” san’s face contorts into a sinister grin before drawing his hips back and slamming into you. his thrusts are sloppy and desperate for pleasure. wooyoung teases your already full hole with his fingers. “can you take some more, baby? your desperate little hole is desperate to be stretched,” he teases you. you tug on his cock harder in response, a small squeal leaving his throat. “i’ll take that as a yes,” he retorts before shoving a finger in to follow san’s movements.
you squeeze the base of wooyoung’s cock as he thrusts his finger inside you. “fuck, wooyo, be gentle,” you beg, the stretch burning between your legs. “aww poor baby. you didn’t listen when wooyoung told you to be nice, so why should he listen to you?” san smacks your ass a few times in a row, your skin turning red. “add another finger, wooyoung. it’s what she deserves.” wooyoung wiggles another finger into your hole, your whole body trembling. “it’s good that you’re stretching her out now, she’s gonna need it for us,” mingi raises his hand for a hi-five from yunho and finds him glaring at him. “don’t be so vulgar,” yunho comments before going back to his work. “says you?” mingi responds before huffing and crossing his arms. 
you hear san chuckle behind you, finding the interaction to be amusing. san regains his composure and begins thrusting into you like a wild animal. wooyoung scissors his fingers inside you, stretching you out even more than you already were. you do your best to tug on his cock while he adds to your pleasure, but your mind is so foggy that you can barely even remember to breathe. you take small gasps of air every few seconds when your brain decides to work. 
suddenly, your whole body ignites when wooyoung wraps his pretty lips around your clit again, sucking harder than before, and desperately licking at you to taste you more. “remember how you came for yeosang and jongho? do it again. i know wooyoung wants to drown in you,” san squeezes your hips to give his statement that extra umph. wooyoung responds with a high pitched ‘mhm’ his tongue darting out over your folds in a frenzy. your hands move up and down on wooyoung’s dick faster, wanting to get a release out of him too. “okay, keep going, i-i’m so close,” you say, despite being out of breath.
as if they had spoken to each other telepathically, san and wooyoung focus all of their energy on getting you off. you slap the floor beside wooyoung’s thigh repeatedly, the pleasure making your body move uncontrollably. wooyoung digs his nails into your thigh, moaning and whimpering louder under you. “wooyo, honey, please cum with me,” you say breathlessly and his hips jerk in response. finally, you let the chord in your abdomen snap, san pulling out of you to let your release splash out of you. his jaw falls slack, watching you writhe in pleasure, while wooyoung drinks up your release. he finishes in your hand swiftly after, coating your hand in his cum. 
without warning, san shoves back into you, his thrusts fast and sharp. “let me fill you up, baby. i wanna see my cum dripping out of your perfect cunt,” wooyoung slides out from under you to observe the end of your pleasurable ordeal. san leans over you to whisper sweet praises in your ear. “you’re so pretty. so, so good to me,” he kisses the shell of your ear gently. “nothing will ever feel better than you. fuck, your cunt was made for my cock,” you nod along to his words as you feel another, less intense orgasm building. “i can feel you clenching. do i make you feel so good that you wanna cum again? my cock slut, cum whenever you want. i’m almost there,” his cock twitches inside of you, leaking pre-cum all over your walls. 
“please, cum with me, pretty baby,” he pleads and you can’t help but obey. he fills you up so perfectly, and you cling to him for dear life. you hear some shuffling around behind you as san pulls out and goes to collect his shirt. you collapse onto the floor, completely worn out. you press your cheek to the cold floor, your whole body feeling sore and spent. you hear someone clear their throat behind you.
“don’t get comfy. we’ve been waiting.”
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© lomlhwa 2024
taglist:
@nopension @cursedeastern @certifiedmoa @tunafishyfishylike @4ngel-f4ngzz @mingisdimple @anxiousskylar @sanhwalvr @querencieaz @vtyb23 @dawn-iscozy
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tomriddleslove · 9 months ago
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Blood on Love’s altar.
✩Tom Riddle x Reader
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Summary: Tom Riddle did not know he could grieve. But now? He’d give up everything to not feel it.
Warnings: Mentions of Death, Suicide, Self Mutilation (brief)
A/N: 🙂
Song: Dove - Antihoney
Antent - hope to see you again
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“You ought to put that away before Professor Dumbledore sees.”
The very first words you spoke to Tom.
First year, 2 weeks into school. It was a Thursday afternoon, to be precise. It was during a transfiguration lesson. Tom had managed to nab a copy of Markov’s ‘A Guide to the Dark Arts’. It was a forbidden book, but one that had greatly intrigued him. He held it under the table, reading.
You nudged him and when he sent you a scowl you did not look away, rather speaking those very words.
“You ought to put that away before Professor Dumbledore sees.”
He just about manages to snap the book shut and shove it into his bag when Dumbledore walks past, the eclectic man giving the pair of you a once over before moving to the next desk.
The second time he spoke to you was in the library a few days later.
“Still sticking your nose in the restricted section?” You pry, sliding up behind him as he startles. He turns to face you, a look of annoyance on his face as he speaks.
"And what business is it of yours?" he retorted, his eyes narrowing.
“You’ve already quite the reputation. Lurking in the restricted section should taint that, no?” You hum.
Infuriating. Nosy. Intransigent.
-•-
“Morning Riddle.” You quip as you walk into potions, taking a seat next to him.
Second year, 3rd day back.
He looks at you but says no more, internally cursing you.
You work on a strengthening solution and accidentally drop a jar of bat spleens onto Tom’s bag.
He debates getting back at you for it, but he doesn’t.
Clumsy. Persistent. Agitating.
-•-
Third year, same scene, same setting.
"Still poking your nose where it doesn't belong?" you tease, sidling up to him with a mischievous grin.
Tom's annoyance flares, but there's a flicker of something else in his eyes, a begrudging amusement perhaps. "You never learn, do you?" he mutters, though there's less bite in his tone this time.
You laugh, the sound echoing through the potions classroom. "Where's the fun in following the rules?" you reply, settling into the seat beside him.
Tom's lips twitch into an almost imperceptible smile before he turns his attention back to the brewing cauldron. Your laugh isn’t awful, he supposes.
-•-
Fourth Year, Charms. The sun was particularly nice that day. It casts a lovely glow on your face.
Professor Trinfort announced a partner project, pairing students for a collaborative spellcasting assignment. As fate would have it, you found yourself paired with Tom Riddle.
You exchange a glance, nudging him lightly. "Looks like it's you and me," you say with a faint smile.
Tom nods, his expression less guarded than before. "Seems that way," he replies, his tone less curt than usual.
As the two of you work together, you notice a subtle shift in Tom's demeanour. He's more open to your suggestions and more willing to listen to your ideas. There’s a newfound ease between you, and you don’t say anything for fear of disturbing it. Tom has left one of his books on his desk again. Professor Trinfort was walking past and you quickly grabbed the book, hiding it underneath your bag. Tom notices and looks at you with an unreadable expression for a second.
Nosy. Irritating. Perhaps not too bad, though.
-•-
5th year. You’re not there. Your absence is noticeable in the first week. It’s suffocating in the second.
Tom finds himself searching for you in the corridors, and he cannot help but feel as though something is missing. He values the quiet he now has during lessons, but it’s not as rewarding as he thought it would be. There’s a nagging feeling in him that he can’t quite shake.
He learns very quickly that you’d been attacked on the first day of term and had been in the hospital wing for quite a while. He visits you whilst you’re sleeping. He stares at your weakened form, not moving. It’s odd, seeing you in such a state.
You wake the next morning to news of the perpetrators being withdrawn from school after they all woke up missing fingers. You somehow know who it is.
Tom does not visit you till you are asleep. When he does, he places your book by your bedside. He doesn’t let himself stay for too long, berating his foolishness as he leaves.
-•-
6th Year. Tensions are running high after the death of Myrtle Warren. You’re all to face your boggarts, and Tom notices how apprehensive you are. You chew at your bottom lip, leg bouncing up and down relentlessly.
He places his hand over your thigh, focusing ahead as you turn to look at him.
“It’s agitating.” He mutters, and he can tell how ridiculous it sounds. You suppress a smile and turn back to the front.
He can tell you’re a bit shaken up from the lesson, so he offers to study with you in the library during the evening. He meets you after dinner, spotting you in the far corner.
You’re wearing a black corduroy skirt—a white vest with lace trimmings and a baggy green cardigan. You’ve pinned your hair back with your wand, the end of your quill pressed to your lips as you work. You’re rather beautiful, he notices. He takes a seat next to you, ignoring the smile you beam as you work together.
Hours have passed and he hasn’t noticed, enjoying your company. He feels a weight on his shoulder and turns, realising you’ve fallen asleep. He huffs in annoyance but he does not move, a hand coming up to remove your glasses from your face as he carefully sets them down on the table. You wake up in your bed, your books neatly placed on your desk. You must have come back at some point, you think to yourself.
-•-
“Hey,” You hum, plopping down next to Tom on the frosty glass near the black lake.
“Morning.” He responds, not looking up from his book as he acknowledges you. You reach into your satchel, producing a small thermos flask. You transfigure a pebble into a cup and pour a glass of steaming cinnamon tea for Tom.
As you hand him the cup of cinnamon tea, Tom finally looks up from his book, a faint hint of surprise crossing his features at the unexpected gesture. He accepts the tea with a nod of thanks, taking a sip before setting it down beside him.
"Thank you," he says quietly, his voice softer than usual, a hint of warmth in his tone that catches you off guard.
You smile in response, a gentle warmth spreading through you at the sight of his rare display of gratitude. "You're welcome," you reply, “Cinnamon tea is my favourite comfort drink.” You add, and Tom finds himself storing that piece of information in the ever-growing folder in his brain labelled ‘you.’
-•-
7th Year. Tom is elected Head Boy. You’re a bit upset you didn’t get Head Girl, but you suppose you weren’t that extraordinary. Tom feels otherwise.
You still got awarded prefect and found yourself paired on patrols with Tom.
“Seems like the universe is set on keeping us together. You finally warming up to me Tom?” You tease, grinning lopsidedly as you both roam down the dark, empty hallways. He meets your gaze with a small smile of his own, a rare display of warmth that sends a flutter of excitement through you. "Perhaps," he replies cryptically, though the glint in his eyes betrays a hint of fondness that you can't help but return.
You continue to walk in silence for a bit more till you (stupidly) have an idea. Upon digging around in your pocket you find a Gorpin’s exploding powered parcels, a tiny thing about the size of an acorn that exploded colourful powder when thrown. With a small grin, you call Tom’s name, tossing the parcel at him. He turns around and meets your gaze for a second before he’s enveloped in a cloud of pastel blue.
You laugh at the sight, clutching your stomach as a string of giggles escape your lips. As the cloud slowly clears, a flicker of uncertainty crosses your mind, a sudden fear that perhaps you've overstepped some invisible boundary. Your smile fades, replaced by a furrow of worry as you open your mouth to apologize.
But before you can utter a word, something unexpected happens. Tom's lips quirk up into a small smile, and he’s chasing after you.
“Tom!” You laugh, the sweet sound echoing through the halls as you begin running away from him.
His laughter joins yours, his footsteps getting closer and closer as you turn a corner. Your lungs burn, laughter bubbling from within you when you’re suddenly swept upwards, two strong arms wrapping around your midsection.
“Got you. Gonna make you pay for this.” Tom says, an uncharacteristic smirk on his face as he practically hauls you over his shoulder.
“Wait, Tom!” You protest, a yelp escaping your lips as he begins running with you in his arms.
Your protests are ignored as you enter the prefect's bathroom, and the second his intentions are clear you laugh, whilst pleading. He shifts his hold on you so you're being carried almost bridal style, and he raises a brow as he looks down at you.
“Wait, Tom. It doesn’t have to be like this.” You plead, trying to free yourself from his gasp. A smile tugs at his lips as he hums, seeming to retreat for a second. But he then holds you tighter, and in two swift steps jumps straight into the baths (which was more like a pool), sending you both into the water. A small shriek escapes your lips, and as you resurface from the water, laughing and sputtering, you shoot Tom a mock-complaining look. "Tom, you're incorrigible," you exclaim, your laughter bubbling up between your words.
Tom chuckles, the sound resonating in the spacious bathroom as he treads water beside you. For a moment, his gaze lingers on you, admiring you.
"You're quite something, you know that?" he says softly, the words carrying a warmth that sends a shiver down your spine.
Before you can respond, he closes the distance between you, his lips meeting yours in a kiss. You all but melt into the kiss, a hand coming up to cup his face, resting in his drenched black curls as you sigh into his mouth.
“Tom…” You murmur.
He’s never heard a more beautiful sound.
It’s nearing a month till your final exams and you haven’t seen Tom for a few days. You venture up to his dorm, knocking on his door.
“Tom?” You call out softly, leaning against the door. “It’s me.”
There’s silence for a second, and then the door unlocks.
As the door creaks open, you find Tom sitting on his bed, looking pale and dishevelled. He coughs weakly, his gaze meeting yours with a hint of surprise before he quickly looks away.
"Hey," you say softly, stepping into the room and closing the door behind you. "I heard you've been under the weather. Thought I'd come to check on you."
Tom nods, his expression unreadable as he shifts uncomfortably on the bed. "Yeah, just a bit under the weather," he mutters, his voice hoarse.
You frown, concern creasing your brow as you move closer to him. "You should be resting," you say gently, reaching out to feel his forehead for signs of fever.
Tom flinches slightly at your touch, but he doesn't pull away. Instead, he meets your gaze with a hint of vulnerability in his eyes. "I know," he admits quietly, "but I hate feeling like this. It's... frustrating."
You nod in understanding, your heart aching at the sight of him looking so uncharacteristically vulnerable. "I brought you some cinnamon tea," you say, pulling a thermos flask and a few biscuits from your bag. "Thought it might help."
Tom's lips quirk up into a small smile at your thoughtful gesture, a hint of gratitude shining through his usual stoicism. "Thank you," he murmurs, his voice softer than usual.
You smile back, and Tom shuffles over to give you some space. You take a seat next to him, crossing your legs as you pour him a cup of tea. You blow on the tea to cool it slightly, taking an experimental sip to ensure it’s not too hot. When you're satisfied with the temperature, you hand the cup over to Tom. He twists it around to make sure his lips touch the same part of the cup yours did. It faintly tastes of cherry lip balm.
You don’t notice the gesture.
You lean back against the headboard, legs outstretched in front of you as you stare up at his ceiling.
“You should go. You’ll get sick.” Tom murmurs, his voice laced with an uncharacteristic apprehension that has you smiling.
“It’s fine.” You smile. You shuffle down slightly and very carefully place your head on Tom’s chest.
He tenses for a second but relaxes soon after. His hand hesitates for a moment before tentatively coming to rest on your shoulder, his touch light and cautious as if unsure of whether he's allowed to show such vulnerability.
"You don't have to stay," he murmurs softly, his voice barely above a whisper, but you can hear the underlying plea in his words.
You shake your head, a small smile playing on your lips as you nestle closer to him. "I want to," you reply simply, the warmth of his body seeping into yours, banishing the chill of the room.
“You shouldn’t.” He repeats, and his words are undoubtedly laced with an underlying meaning that should warn you.
But if you realise that, he certainly can’t tell. You simply close your eyes and speak.
“I’ve never been the best at listening, have I?”
-•-
Exams are over, and graduation day arrives. Tom feels a conflicting mix of emotions swirling within him, and he hates the fact he’s grappling with things he shouldn’t be worried about. On one hand, there's a sense of relief that he won't have to worry about dragging you into the complexities of his life any longer. The thought of you being free from the burdens and dangers that often accompany his endeavours brings him a measure of solace.
Yet, at the same time, there's a pang of sadness that ebbs away at him when realizes that this may be the last time he'll see you. The prospect of saying goodbye, of parting ways, suddenly becomes unthinkable, and he feels a little sick.
As he scans the crowd of graduates, his gaze eventually lands on you, a soft smile gracing your lips as you chat animatedly with your friends. For a fleeting moment, he considers approaching you and saying goodbye properly, but the fear of attachment holds him back.
Instead, he watches from a distance, silently wishing you well. As the ceremony draws to a close and the graduates begin to disperse, he turns to leave, only praying you’ll never have to see him again.
But just as he's about to turn away, you catch his eye, a knowing smile playing on your lips as you make your way over to him. "Hey, Tom," you say softly, your voice filled with warmth and affection.
Tom's heart skips a beat at the sight of you, his resolve wavering in the face of your unwavering presence. "Hey," he replies, his voice barely above a whisper.
You smile up at him, a glimmer of mischief dancing in your eyes. "Trying to run away? You know, you won't get rid of me that easily," you tease lightly, reaching out to gently squeeze his hand.
Tom's lips twitch into a small smile, a flicker of hope betraying his rationale at your words. "I certainly hope not," he murmurs, his voice barely audible over the din of the crowd.
You lean up on your tip toes, pressing a light kiss to his cheek. You pull back and a small laugh escapes your lips, rubbing the faint lipstick mark it left.
Nosy. Irritating. Beautiful.
Tom doesn’t see you for a year after that.
A hesitant knock at the door of your dingy little flat nearing 1:00 am has you alert, and slightly on edge. You reach for your wand, carefully treading towards the door so as to not alert a potential intruder of your presence. You peer through the peephole, and you feel as though your world stops when you see Tom outside.
Hastily undoing the wards and spells that enchant your flat, you unlock the door and Tom all but collapses into your arms.
He reeks of dark magic, and you know. You’ve always known, really. What other mind could be so sadistically brilliant, who else would be able to crumble the Romanian Ministry of magic in a mere week?
You pull Tom into your flat, closing the door behind him as you guide him to the nearest chair. He looks drained, his usually sharp features drawn and weary. Blood stains his clothes, tension evident on his face.
You set to work immediately, inspecting the various wounds all over his body as you frantically recite healing spells, rummaging through a small leather trunk filled with an assortment of vials.
Tom observes you through half lidded eyes that threaten to permanently shut.
He always knew you’d become a healer. He had known since that day you came into his dorm and took care of him when he was ill. He had known since that day you had found an injured crow lying by the side of the greenhouse and nursed it back to full health in a mere hour.
You preserved lives, he took them.
“Up.” You murmur, pulling the hem of his shirt. He obliges, pulling his lead-like arms up as you unbutton his shirt and pull it off. You frown at the scars that mar Tom's chest and he wants to laugh.
Don’t stress over me, sweetheart. It’d be better off for you if I were dead.
He no longer flinches at your touch as you trail your hands down his chest, murmuring spells that alleviate the ache. You're exhausted by the time you're done, slinging Tom’s arm over your shoulder as you help him walk over to your bed.
He settles onto the bed with a heavy sigh, his body sinking into the mattress as if it's the first time he's allowed himself to truly relax in ages. You gently place your blanket atop of him, your brow furrowed as you take a seat at the edge of your bed.
You brush a strand of hair away from his forehead, his eyes drifting shut as exhaustion finally overtakes him. You watch over him for a while longer, lingering by his bedside as he slips into a fitful sleep.
You can't help but wonder how things came to this. How the boy you once knew, the one who had captured your heart with his sharp wit and brilliant mind, had become so lost.
You slide into your bed beside him and turn over, your back facing his. You let your eyes shut and find yourself falling asleep.
You wake up in the morning, and you know before you even turn around. Your bed was empty, barely a trace of warmth left. You had to be sure you didn’t dream last night's events, padding into the kitchen as you yawn.
A singular cup of warm cinnamon tea is there. You smile softly as you take the cup.
You didn’t see him for another two years after that. The news got worse and worse. Attacks were often and many. People were scared to leave the house.
Just when you've almost given up hope of ever seeing him again, there's a knock at your door in the dead of night. You're startled awake, heart pounding as you stumble out of bed and rush to answer it.
As you swing the door open, you're met with the sight of Tom standing there, looking worse for wear. His clothes are torn, his face bruised and bloodied, and it feels like a scene all too familiar.
Without a word, you reach out and slap him across the face, the sound echoing in the silence of the night.
Tom's startled reaction is almost comical, his hand flying up to his cheek as he recoils from the force of the blow. He stares at you in shock, his eyes wide with disbelief as he tries to process what just happened.
You glare at him, your fists clenched at your sides as you let out a string of curses, venting all the frustration and anger that has been building up inside you for years.
"You can't just waltz in and out of my life whenever you please," you spit out, your voice trembling with emotion. "You can't just show up here, covered in blood and bruises, and expect me to drop everything and help you."
Tom opens his mouth to speak, but you cut him off with a sharp gesture, your eyes blazing with determination.
"But you know what the worst part is?" you continue, your voice dropping to a whisper. "The worst part is that no matter how angry I am, no matter how much I want to hate you, I can't. Because despite everything, I still fucking care about you! I sit there, and I read the news, and every day I pray it’s not your death I’m seeing. Do you know how fucked up that is?"
For a moment, there's silence between you, the weight of your words hanging heavy in the air.
"I know," he murmurs, his voice barely audible over the pounding of your heart.
Before you can say anything else, he pulls you into a kiss, his lips pressing against yours with a desperation that takes your breath away.
You melt into the kiss, your anger melting away as you wrap your arms around him, pulling him closer. Despite everything, you know that you can't stay away.
For better or for worse, you're his weakness, and he's yours.
He pulls back and you have to resist the urge to dissolve into tears, bottom lip wavering as he pulls you into his chest.
“Don’t you dare leave. Don’t you dare fucking leave.” You tremble into his chest, and his heart pangs at your plea as he speaks.
“I won’t.”
He stuck to his word. He hated you for it. But he hated himself more. Because every second he stayed, was only binding you more and more to your demise. He was killing you, he knew it would happen, and yet he couldn’t bring himself to leave.
You erode his being, taking away everything that he was sure he was certain of. There were many times he would contemplate simply killing you, ridding himself of this foolish weakness that was causing him so much turmoil. A single look at you and Tom knew that there would be little to no meaning for immortality if you weren’t to be there beside him.
Tom would disappear for days on end, and you’d hear about an attack shortly after. He’d always come back. You turned a blind eye to his actions, ignoring the furious accusations of corpses that lay there in your name.
Truthfully, you could stop him. You knew that you could turn him in, and he wouldn’t dare lay a hand on you. But you didn’t, and so by association every person he killed had their blood on your hands too.
You had been called by Tom at the crack of dawn one morning. His voice echoed through your head, waking you from your slumber.
Clifford close. House 17.
You apparate without second thought, your eyes widening as you take in the scene.
Tom is standing there, covered in blood that you’re sure is not his. You turn around and spot another person, a frail old man who can barely look up.
The frail old man's plea is cut short as a burst of green light erupts from Tom's wand, ending his life in an instant. You watch in horror as the life drains from the man's eyes, a sickening realization settling in the pit of your stomach.
Tom turns to you, his eyes gleaming with a dark intensity that sends a shiver down your spine. Without a word, he turns his wand to you, muttering something that knocks you straight out.
He knows that making you a Horcrux is a drastic and irreversible decision, one that will bind your soul to his for eternity. But at the same time, he can't bear the thought of losing you.
The idea of immortality without you by his side is unbearable, and he knows that making you a Horcrux is the only way to ensure that you'll always be together. It's a selfish decision, born out of desperation and fear of losing the one person who has come to mean everything to him.
A sense of self-loathing creeps in. He knows that making you a Horcrux will condemn you to a life of despair, but he can't shake the feeling that he has no other choice.
When you awaken, you find yourself back in your apartment, the events of the previous moments feeling like a distant nightmare. Tom is sitting beside you, his expression unreadable as he watches you stir.
"Are you alright?" he asks, his voice filled with concern.
You blink in confusion, trying to make sense of what just happened. You recall the sight of the old man dying before you and slap a hand over your mouth, stumbling out of bed as you rush towards the bathroom. You collapse over the toilet bowl, retching. Your eyes sting, and you don’t hear Tom coming in until you feel a comforting hand on your back, one holding your hair up.
“Get the fuck off me.” You snap, pushing him away with a weak shove as you cough.
Tom steps back, his brows furrowing in concern. "What happened?" he asks, his voice tinged with worry.
You whirl around to face him, your anger boiling over as you shout, "You killed a man in front of me!"
He takes a step towards you, his voice cool and collected. "You must have been imagining things," he asserts, his tone firm and unwavering. "We were home all night yesterday."
Your hands tremble with anger and disbelief as you glare at him, tears blurring your vision. "You're lying!" you sob, your voice cracking with emotion. "You're making me seem crazy!"
Tom's gaze narrows slightly, a flicker of irritation crossing his features. "I assure you, I am not," he retorts, his voice tinged with impatience. "If you don't believe me, use Legilimency on me. Check for yourself."
You close your eyes, muttering legilimens under your breath. You probe into his mind, and he doesn’t keep his guard up.
In Tom's mind, you see a vividly detailed memory of him being home all night. He sits with you by the fireplace, a glass of whiskey in hand, engrossed in a book. You drink with him, a drunken giggle escaping your lips as you kiss him.
As you pull away from his mind, a sense of dread washes over you. The memory he showed you is so convincing, so detailed, that you find yourself doubting your own recollection of events.
You come back to this reality, blinking as you suck in deep breaths.
Tom's expression softens slightly, a hint of sympathy in his eyes as he reaches out to gently touch your shoulder. "It's alright," he murmurs reassuringly. "You had quite a bit to drink last night. You're probably just tired."
You nod, though you can’t rid yourself of the nagging feeling within you. Slowly sitting up, you follow Tom back to your bedroom. You lay back down in bed with him, convincing yourself it was a nightmare.
The second you close your eyes, the man calls out to you.
It’s very real.
In the following months, the cycle of Tom's disappearances and reappearances continues, each time leaving you more drained than before. You watch helplessly as he delves deeper into darkness, his actions becoming increasingly erratic and unpredictable.
You're alone in your apartment when it happens, a sudden surge of overwhelming emotions washing over you. You double over in pain, clutching your head as a vision flashes before your eyes.
In the vision, you see Tom, his face contorted in rage as he inflicts unspeakable torture upon an innocent victim. The scene is so vivid, so horrifying, that you can barely believe what you're seeing.
Gasping for breath, you stumble back, your heart racing as you try to make sense of the vision. You feel sick, your mind reeling as you stumble back into one of the chairs.
Tom returns in the evening, and you cannot bear looking at him.
You wash the blood off his hands. He could have used a cleaning spell, but he prefers for you to do it instead. To face the reality of what you’ve chosen. To wash the blood off his hands knowing it could have been yours.
You do not ask him about the vision, because you want to delude yourself into the comfortable reality that it was merely a nightmare of sorts.
‘Those only occur during sleep’ a voice points out in your head. You choose to ignore it.
Egged on by confusion and fear, you begin reading. Researching. A mirror image of Tom, hiding dark books from his sight as you read.
You bring it up one day.
You stand in the kitchen, brewing some tea as you speak.
“Is it possible to make a Horcrux out of a human?”
Tom's eyes widen in alarm, a flicker of apprehension crossing his features before he quickly masks it with a calm facade. "Why would you ask such a thing?" he replies, his voice steady despite the unease that lingers in the air.
You don't miss the subtle shift in his demeanour, the way his gaze flits away from yours for just a moment before returning.
You shrug nonchalantly, feigning innocence as you pour the tea into a pair of mugs. "Just curious," you say casually, though your heart pounds in your chest.
Tom watches you closely, his expression unreadable as he takes a sip of his tea. "It's not something that should concern you," he says finally, his tone firm.
"But is it possible?" you press, your voice tinged with determination.
Tom's jaw clenches, his gaze hardening as he meets your eyes. "Yes," he admits reluctantly, his voice barely above a whisper. "But it's a dark and dangerous magic, not something to be trifled with."
You nod slowly, your mind whirling with possibilities. "I see," you murmur, though you're already formulating a plan in your head.
You reach for one of the barely touched knives nestled in the drawer you had open and without second thought stab it straight through your hand.
Tom immediately drops the cup he holds, rushing over to you.
“What the fuck are you doing?!” He exclaims, eyes wide with disbelief as he stares down at the gruesome sight.
You grit your teeth, a pained sob escaping your lips as you yank the knife back out, and Tom’s heart is pounding at the sight of your blood dripping onto his hands.
“[Name], please. Stop-“ He pleads, stammering as he tries to staunch the bleeding.
You watch in disbelief as your skin begins to heal itself together, an almost grotesque sight. It seals together, and in no less than a minute it’s completely healed, not a scar in sight.
Your stomach fills with dread, eyes widened in betrayal as you look up at Tom. His gaze meets yours, guilt riddled in his eyes as you snatch your hand away.
"Fuck," you shout, your voice filled with a mix of pain and fury. Tears stream down your face as you struggle to process the revelation. "You... you made me a fucking Horcrux?!"
Tom's face pales, his own emotions mirroring the turmoil within you. He takes a step forward,
"I... I didn't mean for this to happen," he stammers, his voice laced with desperation. "I never wanted to hurt you."
But your rage consumes you, and you lash out at him, your voice filled with venom. "You ruined me, you fucking monster!" you scream, your words echoing through the room. "How could you do this to me? How could you use me like this?"
Tears mix with your words as you continue to berate him, your emotions spiralling out of control. You feel a searing pain deep within your chest, reaching out to shove him.
“I’m sorry. I thought it would work out! You’ll be immortal! Can’t you see it’s-“ He starts, and you snap.
"Sorry won't fix this!" you cry out, your voice breaking. "You've destroyed me, Tom. I can never be whole again."
He doesn’t know what to say, remaining silent as he tries to reach out to you.
“Get out!” You scream, reaching for your glass as you throw it in Tom’s direction. It smashes against the wall behind him, but he can’t look away from you.
He ruined you. He really did.
"Get the fuck out!" you scream, your voice filled with venom. You grab whatever is within reach and hurl it in his direction. Books, vases, anything that can cause damage. Each object crashes against the walls, shattering into countless pieces.
Tom has never felt like crying before, but this might be the first time he does. He turns and leaves, for he can’t bear to face what he’s done to you.
He was weak, after all.
You sink to the ground, your body racking with sobs as you hide your face in your hands.
What a cruel thing it was. Even if you wanted to, you could never permanently rid yourself of Tom.
You claw at your chest, as though you can just pull the fragment of Tom’s soul that was bound with yours.
You feel trapped, imprisoned within your own body. Your heart aches with a profound sadness, knowing that you were both beyond redemption. If only you hadn’t warned him that day if only you weren’t selected as a prefect, if only you didn’t try to save him.
Tom hasn’t heard from you for weeks. He doesn’t dare intrude either, no. He had already done enough damage.
The date is permanently engraved in his mind.
August the 17th. 7:03 pm.
He feels a searing pain in his chest. His hand comes up to clutch his heart as a pained groan escapes his lips. He can’t see for a second, his vision blurred.
Every breath is a struggle as he clutches his chest, his heart pounding against his ribcage.
The realization hits him like a tidal wave.
A Horcrux must have been destroyed. He only had two to date.
One was the ring engraved with his family sybil, which he wore on his hand.
The other?
Fear grips him, a fear he has never known before.
No. No. No. No. No. No.
He all but stumbles upwards, his mind focusing on one image as he apparates without a second thought. He appears at the door of your flat and doesn’t entertain the idea of knocking, bursting through the door with such force it splinters.
“[Name]?” He calls out, his voice a desperate plea as he searches through the eerily quiet apartment.
His heart pounds in his chest, his breaths shallow and rapid as he calls out your name, his voice laced with desperation and urgency.
"[Name]?" he repeats, the sound of his voice echoing through the silent space. There is a sense of foreboding, a heaviness in the air as he navigates the chaos, his eyes scanning every corner, every shadow.
His footsteps are quick and purposeful as he moves from room to room, his senses heightened, attuned to any flicker of your presence.
Finally, his gaze lands on a small table, and there, amidst the disarray, he sees a letter addressed to him. His heart skips a beat as he snatches it up, but within the depths of his mind, he knows what the contents of the letter will read.
Tom.
You by no doubt will know by now. I must preface by saying that I hate you. I will never ever forgive you for what you’ve done to me.
I remember with frightening clarity the day we had both first met. You were quite rude, but you backed down slightly when I had covered for you. It was then that I knew you must have not had very good people around you in your upbringing, for you were very reserved.
Despite all that, despite the fact that it was a very clear warning not to get entangled with you, I still did.
Year after year, I persisted. I could tell when you got annoyed, yet I did not give up. I was determined to know who Tom Riddle was.
I knew I loved you the day you had stayed with me after that boggart lesson. It’s rather silly, it was quite possibly the bare minimum someone could have done. But coming from you? Merlin, it was essentially the same as being gifted the moon.
I was not oblivious to what you were doing. Even from a young age, I knew of your plans, of your intentions. I suppose in a sense you’re not to blame, for I chose to love you willingly.
I only wish you had trusted me. You may have loved me, but you never trusted me. If you did, you’d have known my soul was already yours. I was bound to you indefinitely, there was no chance I wouldn’t have loved you.
I wanted love, you wanted devotion. They aren’t the same, my love. Devotion would have been me following you to the ends of the earth if you asked without question. Love would have been me not wanting to, but knowing I’d travel further to save you should you need it.
I would have given the world for you, Tom. I just wish you had let me do it on my own accord.
I love you. I always will. I always have. If there is a heaven though, I hope we never meet again.
Do not be afraid to be human. You, out of despair, and fear, and greed, drove everyone away from you. You cannot mourn a loss that you perpetuated. We are all human, flawed and imperfect. You are too. You may try to avoid it, you can split your soul and continue killing, but you’re only deflecting the truth.
I hope in my death you will meet your own. Mortality is a beautiful thing, Tom.
Do not postpone it. Existence has no better gift.
- [Name.]
-•-
It’s rather cruel how he can recall the entirety of your life in mere minutes. It doesn’t feel right, for the only time Tom truly lived was when he was with you. A lifetime, an eternity.
A mere recollection as he stands at your grave.
The rain is harsh, unforgiving. It seeps into his skin though he’s grateful, for some feeling was better than none.
He thought he would be immune to grief. It wasn’t that bad of a thing.
He can’t recall a day he hasn’t thought about you.
He threw himself further into the dark arts. He became more prominent, more ruthless. Many thought he was simply becoming more powerful.
Tom only hoped that in his efforts someone would find a way to end him. He threw himself into the most haphazard situations with the hope that a spell would misfire, that he would make an enemy of someone who would be able to kill him.
His eyes flicker up to the tree that grows above your grave. It was perhaps the first and only time he had cultivated a living thing.
Cinnamomum verum.
His fingers trace the inscription on the stone. Your laughs are buried deep within the recesses of his mind. They echo everytime he steps foot into your apartment.
It had been 6 years since you were found dead. He hasn’t touched a single thing. He sees life in your unmade bed, in the plants that he has an elf tend to. He keeps your necklace on him at all time, rolling the small pendant between his fingers when he finds himself thinking of you.
He forgoes tending to his own wounds. If it killed him then so be it.
There is not a day that goes by when he doesn’t read your letter.
Losing you was beyond losing a piece of his soul.
It was losing everything.
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outofconcheol · 2 months ago
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Tune In For Love (KSM x GN!Reader)
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pairing: college radio host!Seungmin x co-host!reader
genres/au/rating: sfw, mostly fluff, the mildest of angst, idiots to lovers, pg
summary: When you and Seungmin come up with a crazy new idea for your radio show, a week of chaos and unspoken feelings unfolds. As you learn more about relationships, will the two of you tune in for love? Or decide to shut it down completely?
warnings: swearing, fake exes trope, a playlist of seungmin coded songs mentioned, stupid amounts of pining, mentions of relationship drama, they almost kiss, then they actually kiss, one mild (joking ) threat of violence, Jeongin being the best wingman ever, RAIN, Ningning, Joshua, Cheol, and Day6 all make cameos
word count: 2.8k
a/n: happy Seungmin day!! honestly this could have been a whole fic on its own but i'm happy with this cute little drabble! this draws some inspiration from the ex talk by rachel lynn solomon. our boy deserves all the love, i hope you enjoy!
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“Okay everyone, this has been another week at The Sound FM, the university’s #1 radio station! ____ and Seungmin signing off!”
Your voice fades out to the tune of the hit that Seungmin had selected for the week, ears perking up at the rumble of the bass and the tick tick tick of the hi-hat. Another Day6 song. Congratulations this time. 
“When will you admit that you’re Day6’s number one fan?”
“When you admit that you’re their number two,” Seungmin adjusts his glasses, a devious smirk lighting up his face. 
(You were, but you would never give Seungmin the satisfaction.)
“That segment on how to deal with the stress of midterms turned out great! What should we do next?”
You fidget with your pen, tapping it against your notepad, twirling it around in your fingers, before moving to put it behind your ear–
Seungmin’s hands shoot out, fingers clasping around yours for a brief moment, and a shiver runs through you, despite the fact that it was sunny outside with not a cloud in sight.
“I had an idea, actually, well it’s not my idea, Jeongin brought it up..”
For however composed the two of you were on air, you turned into awkward rambling messes when the mics were off. It had always been like that though. You’d been hosting the show with Seungmin for the better part of a year and you still didn’t know why you felt shy around him, or why you’d barely progressed beyond simple acquaintances.
“There’s this girl that uh, he, yeah he wants to impress, so he was asking if our next segment could maybe have something to do with dating advice.” 
“That is sooo much better than the segment on recycling tips I was planning,” you nudge him, oblivious to the way his ears turn red.
“Oooh but what if we make it spicy you know? Like approach relationships from a different angle?”
“What angle?” Seungmin rubs at the back of his neck. “As far as I know, neither of us are in a relationship. I mean, right?”
“Right but no one else has to know that! What if we pretend that we’re exes, who broke up? Hindsight is always 20/20, people will eat that up!”
“I thought I was supposed to be the menace here,” Seungmin’s tone is deadpan but his eyes sparkle with mischief.
“What can I say, you’re rubbing off on me Min,” you giggle. “So, what do you say we put your charm to good use?”
“You think I’m charming ___?” 
You miss the excitement in his tone, writing it off as enthusiasm for the whole absurdity of this plan.
“Who knows, Min! Maybe we’ll even find people! This is so exciting!”
Seungmin pauses briefly, a choked sound escaping his mouth, but you think you imagine it, watching him straighten and nod.
Laughter fills the studio as you bicker back and forth about what to include and how the next week would go. It was a risk, but you hoped it would pay off — both on the airwaves and maybe even for your stagnant love life. The possibilities were endless.
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“Hello, and welcome to Tune in For Love! We are your hosts, ___ and Seungmin, and for the next week we’ll be tackling all your relationship questions and concerns!”
Your voice booms into the mic, echoing throughout the tiny studio, and you take a moment to mute yourself, heart pounding in your ears. Butterflies had begun to bubble up in your chest – you were really doing this.
“You ready for this?” Seungmin’s voice knocks you out of your daze, and you look over to see his lips twist into a lazy smile, running his fingers through his hair.
Fuck. Why did that make your stomach flip-flop?
You give him a shaky nod. It was probably just the rush of trying something new, so different from what you were used to. The simultaneous thrill and terror of dipping your toes into uncharted waters. 
Seungmin unmutes the mic, his softer, more melodious voice reverberating into the windscreen. He’d make a great singer, you think. Maybe for your next segment you could convince him to croon on air.
“We’re your resident experts on dating, whether it's still in the early stages of puppy love, the cool cruising of the honeymoon phase, or the bitter sting of love gone wrong. We have all your answers, right here, right now on The Sound FM!”
“Trust me, we’ve had experience with all of those,” you chuckle.
The story just falls off your tongue – a tumultuous end to a relationship that had never existed, one full of angst and heartbreak that even the finest writer couldn’t think of. Seungmin interrupts you spontaneously to respond to your dramatic anecdotes with dry quips of his, and you can’t believe it — you actually sound like a couple. A real couple.
“How was I supposed to know you were allergic to garlic? You let me take you to an Italian restaurant on the first date!”
“As my boyfriend, you should have asked my best friend about my allergies! That’s like standard dating protocol,” you shoot back, making sure to smile so that Seungmin knows you’re not serious.
“Noted, I’ll keep that in mind for the next relationship,” Seungmin grunts, the air becoming thick with a tension you can’t pinpoint.
Clearing your throat, your fingers hover over the buttons of the soundboard.
“How about we take some listener calls instead?”
The line crackles to life, a caller named Ningning groaning about how her girlfriend forget their anniversary and didn’t even apologize.
“It’s an honest mistake,” Seungmin mutters. 
“I don’t think so,” you counter, chewing your lip. “It’s important to be considerate of special moments like anniversaries, birthdays. It means you care. I mean Seungmin probably doesn’t even remember mine–”
“October 17th,” he interrupts you, and you go rigid. How did he even know?
I asked Jeongin, he mouths, and it only leaves you more confused. Why would he need to know that? It leaves you more embarrassed that you don’t know his exact day, only that it was sometime in September.  
Ningning rambles on, thanking you both for the added perspective and resolving to make things right with her girlfriend. You feel your heart warm at her determination, amazed at the effect that you and Seungmin had already managed to have on your listeners. 
Seungmin closes out the show, the easygoing and carefree chords of Polaroid Love ringing into the mic, and you think to yourself, maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all. 
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As the sun sets, campus comes alive, buzzing with excitement. You glance out the window, watching students filter out of the library, walking towards the commons for a cup of coffee, or hugging outside their dorms. A deep pang of longing hits your gut, not sure whether its from watching them outside or the fact that you’re cramped here in the tiny studio, band posters all over the walls, and Seungmin is playing Love You For A Long Time, Maggie Rogers’ ethereal voice filling the space between you. 
“Had to ease you into our next listener call,” Seungmin grins into the mic. “This one is – ouch. It might hit home for some of us, I mean you all.”
“Hi, ___ and Seungmin? I’m Joshua, a senior. I’m calling because I have a dilemma – my best friend Seungcheol just started dating my ex, and I’m not sure how to feel. On one hand I wanna be happy for them, but on the other hand, I’m a mess. What would you do if you found out one of you was dating someone else?”
“Oh.” Seungmin breathes out, and he remains there, lips parted like he’s frozen. An awkward silence falls over the studio, and you’re sure Joshua is blinking on the other end of the line, wondering what the hell just happened.
“I’m not sure,” you shudder, thinking of the hypothetical situation. But it wasn’t so hypothetical. You and Seungmin were free to date people. There was nothing stopping you. But it still felt wrong somehow.
“I would give yourself some space, Joshua. Take time to confront your own feelings about this, and when you’re ready you can decide what to do. Let yourself heal first.”
“That’s a good answer,” Seungmin whispers, and you panic, muttering out a rushed goodbye before cutting the broadcast.
“Wow,” you sigh. “That was, I–, I guess I didn’t think of that when I suggested this.”
“Think of what?” Seungmin’s eyes glimmer with interest, and he leans in closer.
“How shit would get so deep? Like how would I actually react if that happened to me? I don’t even want to think about it.”
“Sometimes this feels almost like we’re not pretending,” Seungmin murmurs, a strained laugh escaping his throat, a mask for the change in his tone. 
You’re not sure what you want to say, but it feels like you should say something. The moment hangs heavy in between you two, and you don’t remember how Seungmin got so close, brushing his thumb against your cheek.
“Seungmin, I–” 
“You had a piece of hair in your face,” he responds, straightening up to stretch his arms. “It’s late, want me to grab you an americano?”
Shaking your head, you manage to muster up a weak response, telling him to go ahead without you. He nods slightly, before throwing his jacket on and slipping out the door, leaving you alone.
An unsettling dilemma dawns on you – this was supposed to be an act, but why did it feel so real?
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“You know,” Jeongin’s loud chewing echoes in the dining hall, Seungmin bristling as he watches his friend stuff five french fries into his mouth at once. “I should revoke your roommate privileges for this stunt you pulled. I thought you were grumpy before, but breaking up with ____ has taken it to a whole new level.”
Seungmin scowls, cursing under his breath at Jeongin. Yanking his headphones out of his ears, the lamenting tune of These Days by Wallows cuts off abruptly. 
Outside the rain patters, echoing his stormy emotions. Over the course of the past week, his mood had felt like he was on the world’s most nausea-inducing roller coaster ride. The highs were the times he got to spend with you in the studio, cracking jokes and watching your eyes shine as the two of you came up with the next devious plot for the show. The lows were the knot in his stomach every time someone would call in with a question that hit a little too hard.
After this week, he was glad the show would end, and maybe you guys could go back to the way things were before. That easy, comfortable dynamic that always existed between you two.
“Bullshit,” Jeongin sees the way his eyes zone out, like he can read Seungmin’s mind. “I know you, and I know what you’re thinking and it’s absolute bullshit. You’re in too deep, hyung.”
“I’ll fucking punch you,” Seungmin hisses. “What the hell am I supposed to do, huh? Just spill to ___ that this isn’t some game for me? That my feelings are real? Is that what you wanted to hear?”
“Hyung–”
A gasp echoes from behind him, and Seungmin turns to see you behind him. Your lip trembles, and you lock eyes with him, a tear escaping the corner before you’re turning on your heels, running out of the dining hall. 
Seungmin stands there, frozen with the weight of what he’d just confessed, heart sinking to his shoes. All of a sudden, he feels a sharp jab to his arm, Jeongin’s fist colliding with it.
“What are you waiting for? Run!”
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The rain pelts the back of Seungmin’s neck as he runs, indifferent to the fact that he’s probably soaked to the bone, slipping and sliding along the cobblestone. He can make out your figure storming ahead furiously, like you can’t get away fast enough, and he speeds up, panic in his voice.
“___, wait! Please stop.”
His voice turns hoarse from all the yelling, and he’s about to give up, turn back in defeat (and go sock Jeongin cry into his friend’s shoulder), when you stop under a streetlight, your figure slumping. 
Seungmin is by your side in moments, not caring that he takes your hands in his, blowing on them to give you warmth.
“Y-you d-don’t even h-have an umbrella, w-what were y-you thinking?” he chatters, and he watches your lips turn up in a smile. But your eyes remain downcast.
“What about you?” you whisper, and Seungmin cocks his head, looking at you in confusion.
“I left my jacket in the dining hall with Jeongin—”
“No Seungmin, I mean what about you?” your voice croaks desperately. 
Seungmin takes a deep breath. There was no use in pretending anymore.
“I think I’m in love with you and I don’t know what to do,” he chokes out.
You take his hands in yours and Seungmin feels dizzy. The cold rain no longer bothers him, warmth filling his veins from the inside out.
“You think?” you sniffle.
“I know. I know I’ve been in love with you, since the day you walked into the studio and pitched your ideas for five-star dorm meals.”
“I really like your hands,” you blurt out, and Seungmin’s eyes widen in shock. That was not the response you’d been expecting.
“They’re warm when mine are always cold, I like the way they look when they’re holding a pencil, or when you bring me a cup of coffee. I like your voice too – the way you sing along to Day6 when you think no one is listening, or your annoying little laugh–”
“It is not annoying–”
You press a finger to his lips, and Seungmin thinks he might just evaporate. 
“Not now, Min. I’m trying to say something here. What I’m trying to say is that if there’s anything this whole week has taught me, it’s how much I like you. How much I want to have those crappy problems that everyone complains about with you, how much I want to celebrate birthdays with you, and anniversaries with you, and how I think I might collapse inside if I ever saw you with someone else—”
It’s Seungmin’s turn to interrupt you now,  cold lips colliding with yours, the initial shock replaced with heat. Your hands burrow into his hair and he draws you closer, hands weaving around your waist. The startled, frantic sounds of your breathing did nothing to help the pounding of his heart, and he wonders if you can hear it too. 
In this moment, Seungmin never wants to let go, holding you steady against him even when you part, your breath fanning in the cold air. 
“I just, I, needed to be honest. No more pretending.”
“No more pretending,” he smiles against your lips, nudging his nose against yours.
The wet slap of shoes against the pavement interrupts you both, turning to see the Jeongin behind you, Seungmin’s jacket in his arms. He takes in the sight of you two wrapped around each other, a smug grin lighting up his entire face.
“Hell yeah! It worked!”
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“___ and Seungmin signing off, this is Tune in For Love on The Sound FM, and we’ve loved having you this week!”
The air in the studio buzzes with a different kind of excitement – the dreamy notes of Hypnotized by The Weston Estate filling up the room.
“Before we go, we have something to share with you–” your voice wobbles, and Seungmin reaches out immediately, squeezing your hand.
“Please send your email petitions in so our show doesn’t get canceled, but we’ve been faking it this whole time. We’re not actually exes.”
You can almost hear the collective gasp across campus, the soundboard going crazy as it lights up with calls.
“We are, as of yesterday, the happiest, and newest–, couple on campus,” Seungmin beams, his pride echoing through the mic and your heart lurches at how right it feels to be his.
You hit the answer button, the lines flooding with congratulations and well-wishes to the news.
“Congrats!” Ningning’s voice echoes. “I always thought you were the cutest together.”
“You make me want to find someone of my own now,” Joshua says in the background, and the studio fills with you and Seungmin’s laughter.
When the last call goes through, Jeongin gives you both a thumbs up, shutting off the soundboard. 
You turn to Seungmin, heart racing. 
“I can’t believe we actually did this,” he says,  half-laughing.
“Me neither,” you reply, a soft smile on his lips. “But I’m really glad we did. It feels… right, you know?”
“Thanks for being part of this with us,” he echoes through the airwaves, his voice sincere. “We’re excited to see what’s next—together. And while the show may be over, we hope you’ll still tune in for love every single week — no matter the topic.”
“Next – how to cook a five star meal worthy of any restaurant using just your dorm microwave…”
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a/n pt. 2: As always, any feedback or comments are much appreciated, but I appreciate you all anyway. Lots of love, Isi 💜
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limeade-l3sbian · 9 months ago
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Who was Kagney Linn Necessary?
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(the gofundme for her memorial/funeral will be at the end.)
Kagney Linn Necessary was born in Harris County, Texas in 1987, and raised in St. Joseph, Missouri and in Ridgway, Pennsylvania. [x]
In her early years, she moved to California with ambitions of becoming an actress and a singer but entered work as an exotic dancer before signing with LA Direct Models, a pornographic agency. Karter entered the adult film industry in September 2008.[x]
But that wasn't the entirety of who Kagney was. At face value, the only information I could find with a quick search was the basic information above from Wikipedia. All anyone seemed to know about her was who she was when she was in the "industry." I wanted to see what I could find about her, the person. Not Kagney Linn Karter, but Kagney Linn Necessary.
I raked through interviews she had, her personal social media accounts, and any other articles that I could find just to find any little facts about her that I could.
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I thought about omitting her time within the porn industry to focus solely on everything else except that. But I feel it would be tasteless to keep it out. I think it needs to be mentioned. I think it is important to show that women pulled into the porn industry are not these separate beings from any other woman with dreams. This was a 36 year old woman who was just like any other woman who was preyed upon.
Necessary released an EP, The Crossover, in 2018. In 2022, Karter released her debut album, titled The Take Over. [x] She would post clips of her singing covers of songs as well as songs from her upcoming EP on her Instagram.
In 2022, she began learning how to play the piano, even posting a video of her progress.
Necessary was also a recovering addict. In 2021, she posted about the things that helped her stay clean and how she was pleased at having a second chance at life. In an interview, she was intentionally vague about the substances she used, only referring to them as "candy" and "a little bit of everything." But with no insurance or money for rehab, she opted to detox herself at her parents home, working at their tanning salon for free in exchange for "produce."
She moved from Los Angeles to Ohio in 2019 and got involved with pole dancing fitness studios before being involved the opening of one in Akron, called Alchemy Pole Fitness. She posted many videos of herself having fun and practicing new/old moves.
In November 2023, she was posting pictures of her new house and how well it was coming together,
[their website leads to a website called Alchemy Space Studios and says that it was founded and run by a separate woman. But upon looking up the LLC for the business, Kagney is named as the registrant and she is named as the owner of the space in two separate articles.]
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In 2015, Carter claimed musician Chris Brown paid her $2,500 to be his escort. She reportedly tweeted things like 'I WILL NEVER F*** A WOMAN BEATER EW DISGUSTING' and 'HE IS PURE EVIL' about Brown.
I just felt like adding that because what a queen.
From her students from the studio and friends, she was known to love animals, including her dog, Murphy, and had a deep devotion to the community she was cultivating in Ohio. She was known to be fearless and empathetic, creating her studio as a place for people to feel safe and accepted.
These were the things I could find of her from her personal accounts and the people who loved her. She wasn't an object that will be missed for what "uses" it had. She was a woman who had dreams, who had a community who love her, who had a husband who loves her, dogs she cared for and loved who loved her, and a mother who loves her. I didn't want her story to be another reblog of a lost life.
I know this post is sporadic and clunky, but I wanted to just grab any information I could without crossing boundaries (ex. contacting the family or something tasteless like that). I just wanted to share what she had already shared with the world.
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Her friend, Megan Lee, has posted a gofundme that has already surpassed their goal. But I would still suggest donating if you are able. Rest in peace, Kagney Linn Necessary. 💜
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theostrophywife · 4 months ago
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PROLOGUE
home | chapters | playlist
🤍 pairing: theodore nott x reader.
🤍 song inspiration: cruel summer by taylor swift.
🤍 author’s note: this series has been a year in the making and i'm so glad to finally share it with you. as always, replies, reblogs, and comments are appreciated. I love hearing what you guys think.
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Seventh Year, Great Hall
Pansy Parkinson leaned against the stone wall and surveyed the occupants of the Great Hall over the top of her champagne flute. Seven years she had sat in this very room, during the span of her formative years, holding court at the head of the Slytherin table with her friends. The Sacred Seven, they called themselves. Pansy, Draco, Blaise, Mattheo, Enzo, Theo and Y/N. 
Since the moment Pansy walked off the Hogwarts Express, she knew that she and her friends would run this school. From their infamous common room parties to their shopping sprees in Hogsmeade and late night skinny dipping at the Black Lake, there had never been a dull moment amongst her group of friends. Now they were all graduating. 
It was truly the end of an era. 
In a rare display of emotion, Pansy found herself smiling as she spotted her friends from across the room. Blaise chatting — or flirting, you could never really tell with Zabini — with Parvati Patil. Mattheo and Enzo chucking grapes into each other’s mouths. Idiots, she thought fondly. Lastly, her gaze fell to Theo and Y/N sitting at the far end corner of the Great Hall, talking like they were the only people in the world. 
Some things never changed. 
For as long as Pansy had known them, those two gravitated towards each other like magnets. Theo and Y/N were a package deal. You could never have one without the other. Best friends since birth, they had known each other longer than anyone else in the group. During their time at Hogwarts, Pansy watched her closest friends pathetically teeter between will they or won’t they territory. She thought that tonight might finally be the night that they crossed that proverbial line, but it wasn’t looking promising thus far.
In the past thirty minutes alone, she counted at least six opportunities for either one of them to make a move.
Yet nothing happened. 
Theo had that stupid lovestruck expression on his face as he listened to Y/N talk, chuckling softly as she picked at a nonexistent piece of lint on his lapel. For Salazar’s sake, anyone with an ounce of common sense could see that they were meant to be together. 
Pansy exhaled a long suffering sigh. Those two smitten idiots would never get together unless she did something about it. She truly had to do everything around here, didn’t she?
“Don’t,” warned a familiar voice. Draco slipped in beside her, cradling his own drink as he pinned her with a serious gaze. 
Pansy bristled slightly, causing the sharp edge of her sleek bob to graze her jaw. “I don’t know what you mean by that, Malfoy.”
Draco sighed. “I’ve known you long enough to recognize that look in your eyes. Whatever you’re planning, I want absolutely nothing to do with it. This has the makings of another Pansy Parkinson scheme.”
She raised a perfectly arched brow. “Need I remind you that you’re only with Granger thanks to one of my infamous schemes?” 
As if summoned by their conversation, Hermione sidled up next to her boyfriend. “What’s this about Granger?” 
Pansy grinned, looping her arm around the Gryffindor. “Granger is going to tell her meddlesome boyfriend to mind his own business, while I actively plot against my closest and dearest friends.” 
Hermione only shook her head. Though she hadn’t known Pansy as long as the others, the girl had welcomed her into their friend group with open arms, often roping her into chaotic situations. She had learned the hard way that there was no stopping the force of nature that was Pansy Parkinson.
“You Slytherins and your schemes,” Hermione teased. “Why not just let this one play out, Pans? They might surprise you.” 
Pansy scoffed. “Please. I’ve watched those two bumbling idiots pine over each other for seven years. They had their chance.” She took a long swig of champagne. “Now it’s my turn.”
If there was one thing that people should know about Pansy, it was that she always got what she wanted. Pansy Parkinson never failed and neither would this plan of hers. 
Seven days. Seven friends. Seven steps. Throw in a stunning villa in the Italian countryside and it was the perfect recipe for a whirlwind romance. 
Someone was going to fall in love this summer. 
A Cheshire grin curved its way across Pansy’s lips. “Let the games begin.”
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i-am-baechu · 5 months ago
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♬ Summary: After Y/N tells him something that makes him have bad dreams, Jungkook will do anything to show her that this is the right universe for her. Even though she already knows that 
♬ Pairing: Established relationship; Jungkook x reader 
♬ Rating:  Explicit (18+) 
♬Genre: Established relationship, comedy, fluff, and smut
♬ Warnings: Smut 
♬ Part of, ‘ His Fan Girl
♬ Author’s note: Special guest lol and Part two to Seven 
♬ Playlist: POV - Ariana Grande
Y/N sat in the back and smiled to herself. This was the first time she actually met Mingyu in person. She actually talked to him through facetime on accident and him being an extrovert was happy to make a new friend. Especially if that friend is his best friend's fiancé.  
Jungkook just released his single Seven and Y/N couldn’t be happier for him. She felt bubbly at the song but she does everything in her power to ignore the explicit version. Even though Jungkook sings it to her everyday. She knew the song would do good and the music video shows how clingy he is when he’s in love. Army loved the song and the accomplishments that he did with the song amazed her. She knew Army powers but it always surprises her. 
She let out a laugh when Mingyu messed up the choreography and her laugh only got louder when she saw Jungkook glare at him, “Mingyu, I told you to learn the choreography!”
“I was learning it!”
She shook her head and stood up from the ground. She walked towards them and placed her hand on Jungkook, “Be nice to him. He has a lot of choreographers in his mind.”
Jungkook pouted at this and turned towards her, “Don’t defend him.” 
“No, Y/N, defend me.” 
She leaned forward placing a kiss on Jungkook’s cheek, “Just re-do it. No harm in re-doing it.” 
He rolled his eyes and nodded his head, “Fine but you need to film one with me.” 
“Whatever you want, love.” 
She sat back down and watched them do it again. She took out a bag of cookies from her pocket and nibbled as the two argued about the lighting. She picked up a water bottle and looked at Mingyu, “Mingyu, you should have some water.”
Mingyu smiled at her and glared at Jungkook, “At least someone is nice to me.”
“She’s an extension of me which means I’m being nice to you.” 
After an hour, they finally got the clip and Jungkook shared it on Tik Tok. The drive home was quiet and a thought came to her mind. She let out a small laugh and tiredly turned towards Jungkook, “You know...I wasn’t supposed to go to the BTS concert all those years ago.” 
Jungkook raised his eyebrow and glanced at her through the mirror, “What do you mean?”
“My cousin had tickets for Seventeen. Her mom upgraded her tickets to meet and greet tickets at the last minute.”
“Yo-You were going to meet Seventeen?” 
“I was but I declined because I had a test the next day. I didn’t really think about it until I saw Mingyu today.”
Jungkook nodded his head in a nervous manner and then looked back at her, “Who’s your bias?” 
She let out a small laugh and leaned back in the seat with her eyes slightly closed, “Why?”
“Just curious...” 
“Honestly, I like all of them. I don’t have a bias. I’m going to take a nap okay...I’m tired from work.”
Jungkook nodded his head and rubbed thigh gently as he stared at the road, “Get some sleep babe. I’ll wake you up when we get there.” 
It’s been a week since this conversation and Jungkook has been having dreams about it. What if Y/N went to that concert? He would’ve never met her and he would probably still be single. The possibilities of her being with someone else never crossed his mind because it was always them together. Nothing more and nothing less. It was another night and Jungkook was sound asleep well, trying to be. The mind is a dangerous place. 
“Jungkook, I have someone I want you to meet.”
Jungkook put down his papers and turned to see Mingyu smiling at him, “Oh? Who?”
He moved to the side and there was Y/N. She was dressed in a pink floral dress with her hair in a low pony-tail. He felt his heartbeat go faster at the sight of her, “This is my girlfriend, Y/N L/N.”
He glanced at Mingyu and then back at Y/N, “Girlfriend?” 
“Yeah, I met her at a meet and greet. I saw how shy she was and I couldn’t stop myself.”
She shyly smiled and gently smacked his arm, “Gyu...stop it.” 
Mingyu wrapped his arm around her waist and smiled at Jungkook, “Y/N, this my close friend, Jeon Jungkook.” 
Jungkook couldn’t stop staring at her and he felt guilty. This was his best friend's girlfriend and here he was looking at her like she was his. He shook his head and smiled, “He-Hey.” 
She bowed her head at him and offered him a smile, “Hello.”
Mingyu leaned down and kissed the top of her head, “I’m happy you can meet her.” 
Jungkook shot up in his bed and ran his fingers through his hair roughly, “Fuck.” He glanced to the side to see Y/N sleeping with the plushie that he won her at a festival. He smiled to himself and pushed some hair off of her forehead. His touch wasn’t light enough and she moved in her sleep. She opened her eyes and frowned at him, “Are you okay, babe?” 
He sighed and looked down at the blanket, “It’s stupid.”
She slowly got up and she wrapped her arms around his arm with a worried look, “It’s not stupid if it’s bothering you baby. Take your time.” 
He sighed and glanced down at her, “It’s something about last week that happened...I’ve been thinking about it.” 
She frowned and thought to herself, “Is it because I ate your noodles? I’m sorry-”
“What? You ate my noodles?”
She let go of his arm and frowned, “Yeah....is that not what you're talking about right now? 
“No...you owe me noodles though.” 
She let out a small laugh and pushed some hair off of his forehead, “What’s bothering you then?”
“You were supposed to go to a Seventeen concert...instead of mine.”
She nodded her head and her face shifted in confusion, “Yes? I declined it, remember?” 
“I know...but my mind is making up situations. In another universe you would’ve been with one of them instead of me.” 
She frowned at this and hugged his arm, “Well, it didn’t happen baby. It was fate for me to decline and it was fate that we met.” 
He glanced down at her, “Yeah?” 
“Yeah, you're my everything. Jungkook. Is that why you’ve been sending me flowers everyday?” 
“Well, you deserve all the flowers in the world and also yes.” 
She let out a laugh and kissed the side of his head, “I appreciate the flowers but baby, I always want you. In every universe.” 
The next moments were blurred but the only thing she knew was that Jungkook was cock deep inside of her. His body pushing hers into the mattress. His hair stuck to his forehead with sweat and she couldn’t help but admire his dark brown eyes in the lighting. She pushed some hair away and he stopped mid thrust to look at her. She smiled and leaned up the best she could, placing her lips gently on his, “How could I want someone else?” 
He brought his hand and gently touched her face like she was made out of glass, “I hate that I thought of that. Will you ever forgive me?” 
She clenched at this question causing him to moan, “I will...you have a whole lifetime with me to do so.” 
He chuckled at this and gently thrusted into her making her eyes close, “I will do two lifetimes to get you to forgive me.” 
“Jung-Jungkook, this isn’t a competition.” 
“Y/N, you are the woman that I dreamed about when I was younger. The manifestation of every thought of what I want in a partner. I love you, I love you. You are not only my garden but the sun to my garden. My wife.”
She felt her heartbeat faster at his confession and leaned up to bring him in a passionate kiss. He returned the passion (maybe even gave more) and let out a dreamy sigh against his lips, “You’ve been watching too much Netflix.” 
He let out a laugh and kissed her again, “It’s the truth. I love Jeon Y/N.”
She let out a laugh and pressed her forehead against his, “I love you more.” 
“Impossible.” 
Her eyes fluttered closed when she felt another thrust. She couldn’t stop herself from clenching and he groaned at the feeling. The pure feeling of overstimulation and pleasure was taking over, “Jung-”
“I know.” 
She let out a moan at affirmation and he placed a kiss in the crock of her neck. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he rocks against her. His hips sutter and she felt his fingers digging deep into her skin as he climaxed inside of her. 
He pushed hair away from her forehead and kissed it as she was dazed out, “This is the right universe. Always with me, always. I love you.” 
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rottingworship · 5 months ago
Text
Beg and Bargain
The Proxies x Fem!Reader | Chapter Three
Chapter One | Chapter Two
Summary: Things seem to go sideways fast, but thankfully you are able to eat beforehand.
Warnings: Mean Toby, name calling, reader is referred to with she/her pronouns, pet names (love, my love)
A/N: this was fun, so fun to write! I can't say I did it all by myself, I did have some help from @babehlockdemdoors with some ideas for Toby!
Word Count: 3.2k
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“What did she say?” Brian looks at Tim with curiosity.
“She made John kill himself.”
“O-O-Obviously.” Toby rolls his eyes.
“She also has a fucking roommate–” Brian goes to interupt him, Tim puts up his hand. “She controlled her. Convinced her everything was fine.”
“Her own roommate?” Brian cocks a brow.
“I also learned that John was not a great man.”
“M-most pigs aren't.”
“He was going to kill her. And he somehow knew about her abilities. And so does her roommate. But she says her roommate wouldn't tell anyone.” Tim is giving them everything he learned. “She had never used her ability for bad, so she says. I don't know what that really means though.”
There's quite a huge gray area. They aren't sure how gray you are. Nothing is black and white. Something is off with you.
“If I c-could control people-” Toby starts.
“We don't wanna know what you would do, Toby.” Brian warns. “Got anything else?”
“She's very obedient.” Tim remarks. “It’s… odd. She doesn't really question much. She was upset about the blindfold, but I kinda see why.” He pauses and looks at Toby. “Can you get in her phone?”
“Already tr-tried.” Toby shrugs. “I don't kn-know the code. She has a couple n-notifications from a ‘Val’.”
As he says that, your phone goes off. Toby pulls it from his pocket and looks at it. Another message from Val is visible on the lock screen.
Hey what the fuck was that about earlier?
Another one comes through.
Who was with u?
Toby leaves it alone. He doesn't think anything about it. None of them do. The front door opens and you step onto the porch wearing a baggy shirt down to your thighs and your feet are bare.
“What are you three still doing out here?”
_-_-_-_-_-_
Your bare feet hurt against the old wooden porch. You ignore it. You watch the three of them, your arms wrapping around yourself.
“A-are you not co-cold?” Toby cocks his head at you.
You nod at him. “Freezing. Please come in. I have a question.” You turn around and walk back inside where it's slightly warmer. Goosebumps cover your skin and your arms drop to your sides. You sigh.
Brian walks in first. “What's going on?”
“I'm famished.” As you finish your sentence Brian goes to open his mouth. “And don't say eat something around here. I already tried that.”
Tim and Toby walk in and you hear a muffled, disgustingly inappropriate song. Toby, not thinking, takes a phone from his pocket and you realize it's Val’s ringtone. It's your phone. Your eyes narrow.
“Wha-what is this ringtone?” Toby scrunches his nose.
“It's none of your business! You still have my phone on you!?” You are sure these men are going to make you pull your hair out. The phone stops ringing and you place yourself in front of Toby. It goes off again. A text this time. Toby looks at it. You try to peek at the phone but Toby is quick to move. You follow him. “Toby! What does it say?”
“It’s locked, I ca-can’t read all of it.”
You look at him with half lidded eyes, full of fucking rage. “What can you read?”
Your sudden anger seems to catch them all off guard. Toby reads what he can see from your lock screen. “It’s fr-from Val. She says ‘Saw J-John on the news. He’s dead, th-they say-’ It cuts off.”
Another ding. Another message from Val.
“She is ca-calling the police.”
You have had enough. You snatch the phone before Toby can stop you and take off. Three against one, your odds don’t look too good. You call her back without even unlocking the phone and run from Brian, Toby, and Tim.
“Get back here!”
You end up in the kitchen, behind the table, surrounded by them by time Val answers.
“Hey!” Everyone freezes as you speak. “How’s it going?” You try to sound enthused. Your eyes hit Tim and he mouths for you to put it on speaker. You comply.
“You’re out of breath.” She states it, her concern is palpable. “Where are you?”
“I’m on vacation. Just having fun-”
“With the man from earlier?” She sounds less stressed. But still concerned for your well being. When you take a second to respond, she speaks again. “Love,” She starts, “are you okay?”
“Yes.” You swallow hard. “I’m fine. I’m- I’m trying to enjoy myself.”
“You aren’t reading my messages,” Val is devastated, “and you- you used your mind powers on me. You promised you wouldn’t do that-” You pout, thankful she cannot see your face. You did promise that. “Please, I need to know that I don’t need to call the police.”
“You don’t.” You try to sound as calm as possible. “I’m o-”
“What about John?” Val’s tone… She sounds worried about him. Your face contorts. She continues, “He’s dead. They found him in the woods, a self-inflicted gunshot wound.”
“What does that have to do with me?” You are gripping your phone. Your eyes move up from the screen and towards the men surrounding you. They are all frozen, tense, waiting for you to slip up. There is silence.
“Well, he moved a while ago… Why did he come back?” There is a pause. “Did he hurt you?”
“Val,” Your voice is low and level, but definitely able to break at any second. “I do not want to think about John on my vacation. I’m trying to relax.” Really, you are, it’s incredibly hard though.
“Okay… If you’re okay, I’m just going to forget about what happened earlier. Please, be safe this week. If something happened to John… Just be safe. Oh! Before you go!” She sounds happier now, thinking you’re safe. “Are you really out of breath because of that man from earlier?” You feel your face burning as she asks. You can practically see her brows wiggling as she asks that. “I do think it was time for you to move on! I hope this helps your-”
“I have to go! Bye, love you!” You hang up. Your eyes are wide and your face is hot. You let out a nervous laugh and hope they did not even notice Val’s question.
They did.
“Helps y-your what?”
“None of your business!” You shout. You hold the phone in your hand, waiting for them to ask for it back. You are not giving it up unless they ask. “Sorry, she’s overbearing.” You roll your eyes, “She’s nosy, always has been.” Your stomach growls. “Can I please get some food? I’ll buy it, you can blindfold me, I don’t care. I haven’t eaten since before-” Since before John died. Or was murdered… By you.
“You’re gonna buy it?” Brian asks.
“Yeah! Hold on!” You walk off, phone still in hand, causing the three to follow you. You walk towards the couch, where you laid your bag (and dirty clothes), and rummage through your stuff. You pull out a wallet. “You’re lucky I have this. I’m sure if my ID were found somewhere we’d be fucked.”
‘We’. Not just them. ‘We’.
“I have money, I’ll buy my food. I can even go shopping if you want?” You cock your head. “Not now of course.” You motion to yourself. “But eventually.”
“We don’t usually stay in one place for too long, it may be useless grocery shopping.” Tim informs you.
Your mouth forms an ‘o’.
“I’ll take you to get food.” Brian states it, it isn't an offer. You feel awkward suddenly. You aren’t very comfortable around any of them, but at least Tim you know most (which still isn’t a lot). Toby picked twigs out of your hair. Brian has not done much for you, or with you. “I’ll be outside waiting.”
You nod, swallowing hard. You remember your dirty clothes and ask Toby about them, before heading out. He points towards the laundry room and you take them back quickly. You promise you’ll wash them when you get back. You slide some sweatpants and a jacket on and then your crocs. Your feet don’t feel as bad anymore, but you are still sore. You can mostly only think about your hunger though.
You walk outside and immediately cold air hits you. Brian is waiting beside the car, blindfold in hand. You make your way towards him and take in a shaky breath. As soon as you reach him, you turn around and let him put the blindfold on you. He helps you inside the car, and then he gets in. You struggle briefly to buckle. His hand touches yours and you tense. He helps you with the seatbelt.
“Thanks,” You mumble and look ahead (you hope you are looking ahead). “Would hate to get pulled over while being unbuckled.”
“I think that is the least of our worries.” You can feel Brian’s eyes on you. He starts the car, and you shift. “What did you want?”
“Oh,” You place your hands on your thighs, “I'm not that picky. Just some chicken nuggets and some fries would be fine.”
Brian nods, but you don’t see it. You hope he takes you to get food. And isn’t taking you somewhere to kill you. But then again, maybe that wouldn’t be too bad considering your situation.
_-_-_-_-_-_
Brian is sitting across from you. You are at McDonald’s, eating your chicken nuggets. You can feel your mood shifting as you eat. Your hunger is disappearing. You don’t feel so irritated. Brian watches you eat. He isn’t saying much of anything, and all you can feel is his eyes staring directly at you. It’s getting hard to ignore.
“Is everything okay?” You ask him, looking up. You wipe your mouth, “Is something on my face?”
He sucks in air and shifts in his seat. He shakes his head, “No, no, nothing on your face.” As he says that, you cock your head as if asking ‘then what?’ and he hesitates. He is thinking. “You don’t question much of anything… Do you?”
You let out a short laugh and take a sip of your coke. “Brian, I’ve never not been in control. I don’t know if you gathered that… But- I just-” You bite the inside of your bottom lip. “This doesn’t feel real…”
“I assure you,” He stares at you, suddenly seeming… gone, “it is real.”
You nod. You do not verbally respond. Quickly, you finish eating. Once you stand up to throw your food away, Brian stands too. He follows close behind you. As you throw your food away you hear footsteps approaching fast. Your name is the next thing you hear. Brian places a hand on your hip immediately. You turn around and spot Val. You want to bring your palm to your forehead. You cringe.
“Val!” You shoot Brian a look, trying to get him to release you, before looking back at Val. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m getting food…” Her voice trails off. Her bright green eyes look up at Brian and she starts to open her mouth. She pauses. “Who is this…?” She obviously knows it is not the man you had at your apartment.
“My friend.” You smile at her.
“How many ‘friends’ do you have?”
“Three.” You blurt it out, without thinking. Brian’s grip only tightens. You try to hold back an awkward laugh.
“My love,” Val’s lips purse, “what the fuck?” She whispers. “This is not like you… at all. Are you sure you’re okay?”
You nod, smiling at her. “Yes, positive!” Brian’s hand gives you a gentle squeeze, telling you ‘good job’. Your knees grow weak. “But, I do have to go soon-”
“Wait!” She puts a hand up, “Promise me, if something goes sideways, you’ll get help?”
Your face contorts. “Sideways?” You are reeling. “What are you on about? Look,” You grab her hand, “Val, I am okay. Everything is okay. I’ll talk to you again soon. But, I’m-”
“Getting over some past stuff with John?” As soon as she says it, your face twists again. “Y’know? He was so… Odd. I mean, I would go throw myself on some men too, if he was who I had been stuck with for God knows how long!”
Brian’s hand, still resting on your hip, threatens to move. You quickly place your hand over his, keeping him there. “See! Now you’re getting it!” You try to reassure her. “I’ll try to stay in touch, but just know… I love you.”
Val lets you know she loves you too and heads back to her table. You and Brian head back out to the car and you sit down in the passenger seat. You look ahead. Lying is really taking it out of you.
“Thanks for doing that for me… taking me to get food.” You rub up and down your thighs. Brian nods and starts the car. You just want to sleep. You feel like that isn’t happening anytime soon.
_-_-_-_-_-_
You are right.
It’s you and Toby alone at the cabin. You really wanted to nap, but now Toby won’t leave you alone. You are facing the ceiling, lying on the couch. Your breathing is slow and your eyes are shut. All you can hear is Toby talking, it’s almost lulling you to sleep. Almost.
“Fucking bitch!”
His voice rings through the cabin. You have never sat up so fast in your life. Your legs swing over the couch and you narrow your eyes at Toby. He continues talking.
“Whoa, whoa-” You put a hand up. “What did you call me?”
Toby stops. “Oh, that was- I-I have tourettes.” He says it like you should already know. “Any-Anyway, like I w-was saying, we need to- to make sure you are capable of pro-protecting yourself.”
Your fists ball up, and immediately unclench. “Toby, did you forget I could, I don't know, mind control people?” You cock a brow at him. “I don’t need to be able to get away. But, I think I could still get away. Without my ability. I got away from you, Brian, and Tim earlier.” Toby stands up from the end of the couch. He walks off. “Okay, whatever…” You lean back and close your eyes again.
Something clicks. You furrow your brows and when footsteps reach the door, and you hear it lock, you sit up and your eyes pop open. Toby stands a few feet from you, a hatchet in each hand. You are sure your eyes are going to pop out of your head. You scoot over on the couch and your jaw drops.
“Toby… What are you-”
“Run, fuh-fight, or hide.” It’s all he gives you.
You leap up from the couch and take off towards somewhere. You have no clue where anything is. You know the kitchen and living room. That is it. You make your way into the kitchen and slam into the back door. It’s locked. You have absolutely no time to unlock it. A hatchet slams beside your head and a scream rips from your throat. You beg for him to stop.
He does not.
You rip away from him, and sprint down the short hallway. You slam into one of the rooms and head for the window. It will not budge. Tears fill your eyes. You are begging and screaming for him to stop.
“Fucking co-coward!”
“Toby!” You scream as you fall back. His eyes lock with yours. He does not look away. You inhale sharply. You cannot fuck this up. “Stop.”
Toby freezes.
“Drop your hatchets.”
He listens again. Your head begins to hurt.
“Do not fucking move.”
You feel it before it happens. Your nose is about to bleed. You tear out of the room faster than you had ever moved before. You head to the front door. You unlock it and swing it open. You step onto the front porch, your feet hit the cold wood and you hiss. Something is coming from the woods. Your heart is pounding into your ribcage.
You make out Tim’s jacket before anything. You rush towards him. When you notice his mask, you pretend that it’s normal. That’s how you first met them, it’s not hard to connect the dots. He was out ‘working’. He is slightly bloody, but definitely looks more welcoming than Toby.
“Tim!” You scream, nose gushing blood at this point. “Tim, it’s Toby!” You reach him and grab his arms. “Help me!” Your voice is breaking. “Please-”
Tim reaches for you, his hands grab your waist. He cocks his head at you and your eyes meet his. There is something different about him. That’s not Tim. You really think you are going to faint. His grip on you tightens and you feel his fingertips digging into your skin through your shirt. You struggle to get out of his grasp.
“Toby!” You are yelling for him again. You release him from your mental grasp and rush towards the house. ‘Not Tim’ is hot on your trail. The front door almost swings off of its hinges and Toby stomps onto the front porch. “Please, you have to stop! Something has happened to Tim!” You point behind you.
Toby easily jumps off the porch and begins to stalk towards you. You can’t breathe. Tears start coming. You are sure Toby is going to kill you. You stumble back and rush away from both of the men. You are sobbing. Something slams into your back and you hit the ground. You land beside a stump. A knee is in your back, your cheek against the cold, hard dirt. Your nails are digging into the dead grass.
“L-look at you.” Toby clicks his tongue. “So- So pathetic.” You look at him the best you can, but you can’t see him. Not fully. “Can’t do-do much without your po-power, huh?” Tears cover your face, falling from your cheeks onto the dirt.
You see, out of the corner of your eye, his hatchet raising. You scream. You have never screamed so much in your life. He brings it down. Another loud plea rips from your chest. The hatchet hits the stump.
You want to sigh. You let out a strangled sob and you can’t breathe. You are sucking in dirt as you try to catch your breath. The knee suddenly moves off your back and you are grabbed. You are flipped over and your back hits the ground this time. Toby is leaning over you. He is inches from your face.
“Please!” You scream, “I’m-” You can’t think. “I’m sorry!”
Toby tenses. “We-weak.” He mumbles. You try to cover your face. Your hands are stopped by Toby’s knees. He is restraining you. “Fucking weak.”
“Toby!” You hear Tim. “Get off of her!” He is running towards you. You are uncontrollably sobbing. Toby doesn’t protest. He grabs his hatchets and leaves you. He walks off into the woods and you look at Tim. “Are you-” You shake your head. When he reaches for you, you scoot away. Tim freezes, his eyes widening. “What did I-”
You get up. You run straight back into the cabin. Tim does not chase you. You hide in the bathroom. You close and lock the door. You sit on the floor, back to the door and you cry. You look at your phone and cry. You know you can’t really explain what happened to anyone, so you just sit and cry.
Once you finally catch your breath and can think somewhat straight, you figure it’s best to sleep in the bathroom tonight. If your mind lets you sleep at all…
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tmbgareok · 17 days ago
Note
Evening Mr. Flansburgh!
I am an aspiring musician! I really want to create my own songs, but since I'm an absolute beginner starting from the ground up, I am soul-crushingly daunted by which skill I should focus on learning first, especially with the amount of resources available to me online (Singing? Lyric writing? Learning a particular instrument? Mixing? Music Theory? etc).
Do you remember what skill(s) you focused on doing first when you were just getting into music, or have any recommendations about the order to do then in?
Much appreciated!
JF: reflecting on it, my experience was extremely organic, slow-evolving and combined so many of my interests and obsessions I am not sure it is necessarily that universal. (For instance I was kinda obsessed with recorded sound before I started writing and recording songs on a tape recorder, which I did for a couple of YEARS before I ever played in front of another human being). So I came to writing songs with some extra skills that actually facilitated my earliest efforts.
An art history professor of mine said "Art is foisting your obsessions on the world" and I think he was right. Another art professor of mine said if you embark on a dozen creative projects, the odds of creating an inspired one greatly increases over simply working on one. I think this is very good advice, and is echoed by a lot of folks writing about the nature of creativity.
If you can't play chords, or move your hands around a keyboard or a fretboard fast enough to play a chord progression, saddle up to a screen with a movie and practice scales so your fingers get stronger. Do it everyday for some time. Then practice toggling back and forth between two chords as quickly as possible. Get a metronome. You know why!
Yes, a song is exactly the confected thing your mentioned in your request--it's a lyric, a melody, a progression, a beat, an evolving musical notion. But those parts are often created at separate times and simply smushed together. It doesn't have to be done in one go, and if the whole enterprise seems odd, or your skill set is underdeveloped in one way or another, assembling a song from the various moving elements might be an easier way to approach it.
(also a couple of days ago someone was asking about singing and I pointed at a few ideas there--essentially taking advantage of these free online vocal warm up videos)
I think you should gather a small clutch of tools--a tape recorder or a DAW that is simple enough to master quickly--there are multitrack recording apps that you can install on your phone that are intuitive. A couple of instruments-a guitar or keyboard, maybe an auto harp.
Find a place to work where you can make noise and not be heard.
I think you should start writing in a physical notebook where you can write down your ideas and revisit them. I wouldn't do it on a computer. It's slow writing, and the screen just creates distractions.
Write a bunch of lyrics without trying to write music: Make one about you but write it like it's about someone else, one about someone else's experience but sing it first person, write one about a group of people. Be positive. Be negative. Be regretful. Be optimistic. Express anger. Be as extreme as you can stand. Experiment in writing in every mode you can think of. Here somebody would write "express your own ideas", but ALL of your ideas will be your own! You are making choices based on musical notions that inspired you, but what comes out of you will almost certainly be different enough, and if it's too close to something else, shimmy it around so it isn't distracting! Write a few chord progressions. (A two chord progression that just sounds interesting going back and forth. A four chord progression. Make a beat, or find a beat online, and write a bass line or just a sequence of single notes on a keyboard or guitar to make a pleasant, evolving line. And see if you can write a "song" or two with a two or four chord verse, and a chorus that is a different chord progression.) Write it down and revisit it! Record it slow. You might want to speed it up later when it's "under your fingers."
Pretty soon you will have all the component of what you need to put lyrics to music. You can also try just singing lyrics over a beat, and then figure out the chords underneath AFTER you have a notion of a melody.
That's enough free advice. Go write some songs!
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