#he would be a less interesting character if he had less agency in the whole ordeal. don't take this from him

[wolfkller]

louis is so fun and relatable precisely because he knows armand merked claudia and his penance is being miserable on purpose all the time

[skrrts]

stairs & life, up / down (oneshot)

✧ gn!reader x kim hongjoong ✧ genre: non idol, slice of life, strangers to love interest, comfort, soft emotional ✧ word count: 10,4k ✧ warnings: adult language, smoking (don’t do it!), loneliness, end of friendships, moving on from a relationship, getting over heartbreaks, facing challenges in life, crying

The ripping sound of paper, the clicking of a mechanical keyboard. Loneliness sounds & feels different to everyone but somehow, Hongjoong feels like you understand his. Yet, you confuse him. Why was your first encounter so bold when he hears you crying at night when you think nobody is listening? The fire escape of the old building suddenly becomes a place of comfort he didn’t expect to find in the loneliest city, filled with millions of people but now, there is you.

a/n: when i think of summer, i think of spending long nights outdoors because it's still warm and you just talk for hours without worrying about whatever happens tomorrow. hongjoong & mc both went through some hardships with different types of relationships but they are where they want to move on, all they needed was a hand to grab them and help them going forward. thanks for reading 🤎

The sound of paper being torn apart was often how Hongjoong would describe what his own heartbeak felt like and maybe, if it wasn’t already in pieces, it would be now. Fifty hours of passion, sleepless nights, and love torn apart, a woman with an unpleasant face hissing when she dropped his art like it was a random document.

“There was no reason to destroy it just because you did not like it,” he finally stated and received glares for daring to speak up. “It was garbage, what exactly did you plan to do with it? In fact, every artwork you have shown me in the past few months has been just that. What was the point in hiring you when your social media works were all fake?!”

Hongjoong wanted to wince but somehow managed to keep it together, being called deceitful as an artist who had given up so much for his art was hard.

“My style is exactly the same as the work you saw when you contacted me and I work the exact same way,” he bit his lip when she stood up and seemed more interested in answering her phone which was constantly buzzing in her overpriced pouch. People of her rank often held no passion at all, they only faked it for the smiles and the press.

”You have another month, if you cannot come up with the proper concept, you are out and of course, we cut your payment in half again. After all, since you came here five months ago, you did not deliver anything we could work with. That’s all.”

Hongjoong was about to demonstrate but the director of the publishing agency just left him standing there. 

He never wanted to come to New York, he could not care less about the city everyone wanted to live in but there had been nothing left for him back home. When he found the girl he loved and dated since high school being with another, the one he had given his whole heart to so foolishly, telling him it was a pity that kept them together for so long because just like so many other people around him, she judged him for his passion and his income rather than his values and happiness. Sure, he could survive from what he was doing but in their eyes, it was not worth to be called living. She dreamt of a house with a pool, a nice car, and an expensive beach vacation, rather than a cozy apartment, taking the bus and weekend trips.

On that day, when he was crying and walking through his hometown without direction, his parents said that it was time to finally grow up and work for a mindless ad agency that would gladly take somebody with his talent rather than chase his dreams of being permitted to illustrate an entire children's book, one with a deeper meaning unlike all the projects he was part of so far, where he often designed characters but based on guidelines rather than freely.

The invitation of a publisher seemed to be a wink of fate but now, Hongjoong simply found himself trapped in a city of millions, yet never having been more alone. 

Maybe he always had been, considering how blind love made him, believing to hold the love of a woman who cheated on him for who knows how long, likely even making use of his nights of working and being home late.

He had been such a fool.

The small ringing of a bell announced his arrival as he entered the familiar small grocery store which always was the destination at the end of days like today.

One benefit in all of his misery, Hongjoong was used to managing his life with little money, he could live from the shortened salary with some tricking and ignoring cravings. There also had been savings for emergencies, put aside for better times.

“How do you even manage to survive when this is all you eat?” San frowned, pointing at the selection of instant noodles and a few cans as he scanned each one. The store belonged to his family and the student helped out frequently. 

Hongjoong offered him a playful little grin: “Magic, Sannie. Now…”

He bit his cheek and the man knew, frowning: “Another package? You said you meant to quit smoking for good… you rather should get dinner rather than spend it on this shit.”

Painted nails brushed through dark wavy hair as he shrugged: “I’m an artist, we need to have some kind of weakness, yes? Unless I suddenly find a muse and that one makes me go insane.”

He knew the other meant well as he sighed but added a package into the plastic bag, handing it to him. “Just look out for yourself.”

Hongjoong smiled at the younger: “I always do. See ya.” The guy did not need to know what he was going through, maybe Hongjoong himself was still trying to understand just that.

It was easy to smile for everyone, he had become an expert in that field. Maybe he should join those TikTokers who made seminars out of canvas pages about something that barely was a secret but called it ‘Guide to Happiness’.

At least, he was about to be home, his haven. Hongjoong had been thrilled when he found the under-the-roof apartment because there was no AC and the building was rundown, the rent was cheap but he loved it because he easily managed to access the roof, there was nothing more beautiful than allowing himself to sulk in loneliness while watching the never sleeping city.

It was almost poetic, wasn’t it?

There also used to be the benefit of being the only one who did not put some shutters on the window which was the entrance to the fire stairs. The view was ugly, but it was handy to simply take the stairs and get right up.

Well, it used to be because the new tenant who moved into the apartment right underneath him did not seem to share the sentiment of the others, the window was always wide open and it would be creepy if he would rush past it.

He lurked up but Hongjoong noticed immediately how it was open again and he sighed, muttering to himself as he made the way up to the longer stairs. Too many. He dodged a few abandoned shoes of children in front of one, a growling dog at the third, and survived!

“I am home.” 

When he unlocked the door, silence greeted him. There no longer was anyone who rushed over to smile and welcome him back but now, he was not even sure if that ever happened or merely being an imagination, an altered memory. 

His apartment was small but that was okay, he didn’t need a living room and only having a tiny shower made being short less tragic.

While Hongjoong lived up to the cliche of being a poor artist, at least he did not need too much space.

His gaze went over the sketches still scattered over the kitchen table, picking one up: “Guess, you aren’t it either, sorry.” Unlike that awful woman, he carefully formed a small pile and put it in a paper tray for all his rejected designs, so far it had been every single one he offered to them. 

Maybe it was time to give up…

No, this was not the time to cry and get sad! Urgh, hard enough to admit he had been such a crybaby when moving here, the way how his heart ached and he was lost among strangers. It was when he started smoking again, something he stopped years ago but now.

There was nobody who would complain about the smell.

Hongjoong slipped into the shower, running water always helped to wash away thoughts, he just imagined it as he carefully cleaned every inch before enjoying the feeling of a fresh pair of clothes and ruffling his hair with a towel. 

“Attempt number seven it is,” he sat down, pulling over his tablet when a loud ringing sound interrupted the early hours of the night, enough to make him jump.

“The fuck?!” Hongjoong blinked, looking around but he was sure he didn’t even own an old-fashioned alarm clock. As the sound wouldn’t stop, he rushed to the window, lurking out only to realize it must be coming from your place. Why would you have an alarm clock going off at nine?!

Nobody else seemed to be interrupted by it but Hongjoong and he was working best at night. As nothing happened, he figured you probably just forgot to turn it off before leaving, how reckless to leave your window open in New York!

There was clear hesitation before he climbed out of his window, taking down the stairs: “Screw this…”

Your window was wide open, the curtains softly floating outside, all lights on. Your place was just a little bigger than his but you surely put more effort in! The walls were painted in a comfortable olive green, plants matched perfectly with the white furniture and there was a large gaming setup he did not really expect but then, what did he know about you? The bed was covered with far too many pillows but there it was, the one causing so much trouble.

The alarm clock had the shape of a flower, it was cute and he wondered how somebody who liked such a style would move to this part of the city…

“What do I do?” Hongjoong looked around. He counted to one hundred. There was nobody in sight, the sound drove him insane and he did not want you to get back home just to find your expensive equipment stolen. The world was an asshole to him but he intended to be better.

He swallowed and slipped inside your home, quick steps leading to the damn noisy item to turn it off. At that moment, the bathroom door opened and you walked inside, holding likely a few bottles of soap you just switched out, your gazes met and he could see how your face turned red, just like his own, and the next second, there was a small scream and you started to throw shampoo bottles at him.

Hongjoong tried to dodge them, dropping the alarm clock in the attempt and grabbed one of your pillows to protect himself.

“Hold on! Stop throwing things at me”, he called out but now you seemed angry.

“Why would I do this?! You just broke into my apartment! A thief? Gosh, you are one of those perverts, aren’t you?” You were one burst of energy, he had to give you that. Hongjoong was about to say something when he fell backward over another pillow.

His hands lifted up into the air, praying you’d not murder him with hair conditioner: “Hold on, hold on. I live above you! Your alarm wouldn’t stop and I thought you left so I meant to close the window, lots of robberies in this neighborhood!”

While your face remained distrustful, you held your movement in the middle of the air, frowning, doubting.

“Which neighbor breaks into a place to turn off an alarm bell?” you questioned and that was a good question. Who would have done that? 

“Well, I actually work at night, I need a little bit of silence but how am I supposed to do this with that noise?” he pointed at the alarm once more and this time, you considered his words.

“Fine, let’s say it is the truth. It’s still weird, you could have used the staircase and just knocked on the door like any other angry neighbor would.”

That was… a very good point. 

“I should have done that,” he admitted and slowly stood again. You were looking at him, maybe considering how he barely looked like a threat, considering he was wearing pajama pants and a hoodie with a washed-out brand name.

“Alright, I will forget about it. Now get out!” you pointed towards the window and Hongjoong found himself blushing in embarrassment. he clapped his hands, bowing slightly: “I promise to knock next time.”

As you hurried over, you wondered if he had seen right and there was a small smile on your lips as he carefully slipped out. As he turned around on the fire escape, you closed the window, and your gazes met for a moment, he was giving you a tiny wave before you rolled your eyes and closed your curtains.

Hongjoong stood there, blinking for a moment until he sighed and made his way upstairs, just to be greeted with the wind likely having shut his own, forcing him to go all the way down like that and up to his apartment. Thankfully he didn’t lock the door yet when he came home earlier.

“Tch, such a reckless neighbor,” he smiled.

“Oh? Oh! This is new!” Wooyoung fished the box with flower-shaped chocolate out of the paper bag. Hongjoong made a face, trying to snatch it but the younger grinned, holding it up.

“They are also kind of expensive, do you have a crush?” It took some effort but eventually, he stole his box bag and gave it to San who was scanning them.

“I am not in love, I just kind of pissed off one of my neighbors and now I intend to make it up somehow since they live in the apartment right underneath me,” he put quite a bit of effort in leaving out as many details as possible because Wooyoung would be curious enough to just knock on your window to see himself.

“Right, you said somebody moved into the empty apartment? Took some time, you mentioned that it was already without a tenant when you moved in.”

He appreciated the cashier was offering some distraction to his best friend’s consideration of just going with Hongjoong, he did not need to say it out loud for the older to guess as much.

“Ah yeah, the landlord was surprised when he offered that one but I asked about the rooftop apartment instead. I just like the peace and quiet, nobody above me, all that,” he mumbled, rubbing a hand over his neck.

“The Lone artist above the rooftops of New York City, romantic if you asked me,” Wooyoung winked and grabbed his backpack. “Anyway, time for training, call you later San!” He waved and rushed off, the other just smiled before handing the grocery bag to Hongjoong.

“I am sure the person knows to appreciate it, this is the first time I have seen you try and … well, mention to interact with anyone outside of this store.” 

Hongjoong tried his best not to swallow hard. While San only was having a casual conversation, he called out something that the artist had tried to avoid admitting: he had dodged everyone and everything ever since coming here.

The hurt was still too deep, the way the person closest to him, he smiled at and kissed every day, threw him away like trash and everyone else saying he should understand how it certainly wasn’t an easy life rather than taking his side

or just offer comfort.

He could have used a hug.

Now, it was hard to let anyone in. San and Wooyoung were nice but they just were two guys working at a grocery store that was conveniently close to his apartment, as kind as they seemed. 

“I just really like living here, sure, the neighborhood’s a bit … tense at times but otherwise, the rent is really cheap and the place is great to work at, not much noise considering we are in a city of this size.” 

San was looking at you, it was hard to tell if he took it or simply decided to keep his thoughts to himself but he smiled: “Well, just make sure to also enjoy the city, not only busy yourself with work. I know, artists are said to do that but yeah.”

It was as if he wanted to say more but Hongjoong already waved in tiny, grabbing his bag: “Speaking of that, I have a deadline so I better be going. Thanks again.”

Hongjoong was out the moment after, he could not hear San’s deep sigh when the bell rang once more.

He spent a good amount of time drawing a little doodle that looked like your alarm clock, looking upset and cursing about that weird guy in a little thought bubble. Next to it, Hongjoong wrote, "Sorry for having broken into your place, heard this chocolate is great." He was pleased with the result and carefully stepped outside his window, placing the little delivery right by your window, knocking against the glass, and he rushed upstairs, jumping into his own home as he waited for the noise of you opening.

His heart was beating loudly when he lurked around the corner, hearing you sigh but in a pleasant way. He did not dare to fully look, biting your lip but after a very long minute, he could hear your voice: "Just knock next time you want to say hello."

Your laugh was so soft and cute.

He grinned when the window was shut a moment later and the chocolate was gone.

Hongjoong had a talent for forgetting about time when he was working and it was less about the deadline and more so about his passion. He always loved to draw, it had been his escape from a young age and he pushed through it, no matter the concerns of everyone around him. He never wanted to be rich, just do what he loved and make enough to be able to live from it.

In a way he did, his old apartment was small but nice with a lovely view and enough space for two. Looking back, he had been a fool how he thought that his ex would enjoy it, that she liked they took their time and both added to a dream of a larger home. The series he illustrated with a few other artists for a children's magazine was doing well then, he knew it was one of the favorites in consideration of being further produced with another spin-off when it happened, Hongjoong quit.

Just like most, he also worked digitally but when he was in the early stages, he often liked to reach out for old-fashioned paper, getting a few sketches done. It was when his pencil rolled from the table that he pulled the chunky headphones from his ears to pick it up when he heard it for the first time.

It was a quiet sob, the kind where you hated yourself and just wanted to stop but your body was boycotting you, ignoring your quiet pleas for it to stop. Hongjoong had done the same for a while after coming to New York but somehow, yours hit him more than he expected. The way you faced him when he came in, the conversation after.

He should know better than assuming you were a confident person just doing your thing.

His slim figure pressed against the wall next to the open window when he listened to how you cried.

It was strange, when the heart ached, even a city like this could fall in utter silence, making one feel even more alone. He bit his lip, it was hard to listen to it and when he finally convinced himself that checking on you was more important than his fear of interrupting, the small clicking sound to pull his window fully open seemed to be enough to chase you inside like a bird fleeing from busy human steps.

All Hongjoong managed to see was the way how your lights turned off and for a moment, he wondered if you maybe prayed that he did not come down to see, that the weird guy above you just opened his window to let him some refreshing air in at the end of Summer.

He was trying to recall all of those nights after you moved in, where he kept his window open and so did you. What did he hear then? There had been that clicking sound, he could hear it any time he ended up sneaking up to the roof to smoke a cigarette. He never put much thought into it but now, you always seemed to be typing on your keyboard and you were home all the time, just like he was.

When he returned from groceries, your lights were on, and when he lurked outside in the morning, the window open.

In a movie, he probably would have thought more about it and told himself to see if it would happen again. Maybe you just had a bad day. Maybe you were just going through a hard breakup.

Just.

Maybe, if anyone had been more gentle with Hongjoong, he'd not have felt the need to move far away in a desperate attempt of moving on.

No, things would have been different if people would have acted and wasted less time guessing.

"Screw this," he cursed and walked over to the mirror. He was trying to fix his hair but it was a mess so he grabbed a hoodie and put on some summer shorts, cigarettes shoved inside of his pockets, two bottles of soda in each hand.

If you thought he was insane after this, he could live with it, really. He preferred it above having to regret wondering what happened tonight.

Hongjoong took two stairs at once until he was in front of your windows, curtains closed and while it was dark, he could see a small gleam of light, likely from your phone. He took a deep breath before knocking again.

"Hi there, it's me. Again... Uh I am Hongjoong! I know I am probably starting to get annoying, and if you decide to not answer, please just do not call the police.... I was just thinking, maybe you want to have a soda with me? I can't slepe either, I tend to work through the night.

He rambled because this was how he found comfort, he did not need to hear specific words, just little affirmation, a gesture of love. It could be something silly.

When you did not answer, he bit his lip and looked around: "Uh, I will sit down here and smoke one cigarette. If you decide not to come when it's done, I promise I go back up. I'll leave you one bottle there."

He called, placed it down carefully, and moved over to the stairs, taking a few up before sitting down, opening his own drink before lightening the cigarette.

He was exhaling only for the first time when the window opened: "You know, smoking is super unhealthy?"

Your voice did not indicate that you were crying but he could see your eyes still being red and puffy. Hongjoong looked at you like you were amazing just like that.

"You are right, I admit, I only picked the habit up recently again."

He blinked surprised when you grabbed the bottle and sat down by his side, just to take the cigarette away and inhale the smoke. He was blushing, not having expected such a bold move after you cried.

"Guess, we can make it a bad habit just for tonight then," you breathed and used the stairs to open the bottle, drinking it more like it was a party drink rather than ordinary soda, offering the cigarette back.

Hongjoong was in awe, he did not assume you would be so outgoing, although he had no doubt you were brave considering the way you two encountered face to face for the first time. The thought let him grin a little: "Sounds good to me."

His gaze wandered back over the not-that-pretty view: "The sight from the roof is pretty amazing, not sure if you maybe want to have a look another night. I can show you how to get up there."

You laughed, relaxing back: "Why am I not surprised you went up there?"

The man looked innocently: "Well, I have a lot of time to think when I am settling for a design."

The word seemed to gain your interest and you leaned in: "You work at night and that doodle was really cute. Is it something artistic you are doing for a living?" The question was fair and straightforward, leading him to shrug just a little. Most people were disappointed about the answer, somehow it did not seem to be a popular idea when it came to art.

"I work as an illustrator for children's books or that is the preferred one, I also do magazines or commercial designs for such. As for books, I do both, the traditional ones for young kids where the images carry most of the story but I also occasionally take scenes from books for older audiences, you know, mainly those right before young adults where you find little images between the chapters? Mh, I dream to make one exactly in the design I want but for now, I am stuck to work with criteria set by the publishers."

Hongjoong learned to explain what he was doing right away because when it came to illustrations, people often thought about the really expensive artworks connected to infamous titles. You did not really seem to bother with the clichés, instead, your face was so bright and excited, that he was feeling shy.

"That's so cool? I only got into reading because of those kinds of books. I mean, I get it, you are supposed to go wild with your imagination when it comes to reading but I always preferred those pages that told me what to expect but that makes sense, I'm a number person. I like facts."

Numbers, huh.

"This is the very infamous part where I offer to you that if you ever want to see something, knock on my window any time or well, I guess. You have all the right to just walk in through my window. I am awful and my phone is my alarm clock tho," he teased with a more confident grin and you returned it gladly.

"I will keep it in mind, Hongjoong." You stretched.

"It's getting late and you wasted your cigarette, I will take that as a sign to withdraw," you smiled and picked up your bottle, standing. The artist was a little disappointed but it was fair, he knew it had been far after midnight when he heard you crying but now, he was happy to see you relaxed.

"Maybe I will come back to your offer," you hummed and walked down to your window. "Oh, by the way, I am __ and don't be too disappointed, I am a software engineer. That is also why I am home all the time, the bliss of being able to dodge offices but I feel, that you know well."

As you slipped inside, you were about to close the window before lurking out again: "The chocolate was tasty, thank you."

As the window shut, Hongjoong stood there, smiling to himself.

He didn't remember ever having felt as tense in the past when handing in drafts. His old publisher had been a guy in his early 60s and even in the early stages of Hongjoong's 'career', supporting them to test their own ideas within the limits of the work. Something about getting a poor payment but at least, being able to do their thing.

There was yet a small voice of hope, one that told him this piece of paper would not be torn apart because the woman was looking at it far longer than she had at any other of his earlier designs. After hanging out with you, Hongjoong had worked nonstop, a new adrenaline rush that helped him get done with it.

Finally, he exhaled when she leaned back, placing it on the desk: "Finally, something we can work at. I approve of the cats, I expect a more detailed version at the end of the week. The dogs are too ... basic. There is just nothing memorable about them, I want two pairs of options for them. That would be all, Mister Kim."

Hongjoong could live with that! The cats were the story's main protagonists about a pair of cat siblings moving with their owners to a new city and dealing with all of the changes. Yeah, maybe it did not seem like a deep story, just another book to offer comfort to kids moving but the name on both, the writer and label were big... opening doors. What else did he have left than his career and maybe, the nagging desire to show everyone how he could do it?

I would rather be happy tho, and loved.

He only gave her a quick nod as she seemed busy again, slipping out of the office. "Why is this such a pain...." he mumbled and checked his phone. Would it be weird or too early to ask you for your number? Hongjoong hadn't given it to anyone, well except San because he got permission to use the convenience store as a secondary address, should packages fail to be delivered to his door.

Hongjoong could not deny that he was tempted to look you up online but he did not log into any of his accounts since coming to New York. If anything... he did not even tell anyone. He just sold everything, quit his job, and moved. The only person who knew was his older brother, who had been supportive unlike the rest of the family but accepted his wish to remain hidden for some time.

"Honjgoong!"

Hearing his name out in the open made him wince and he blushed when he noticed it was you who called out for him. You were smiling, waving confidently, ignoring gazes. Maybe you really just had a tough day last night. It was so hard to imagine you being somebody who cried a lot.

"Seeing you out in the wild, I am scared," he teased with a grin, walking to your side. You pointed at the heavy bags with groceries, making him realize what you wanted.

"I see how it is, somebody asking me to make the stairs my workout," he chuckled as you looked innocently. "How about, we call it quits then, for good? And in return, you can use the fire escape as often as you want, no worries. You did start to avoid doing that because of me, didn't you?"

He was surprised by the question: "Uh... how do you know about that?"

You laughed and it was sweet, he preferred seeing you happy: "Well, when I signed the contract, the owner told me the guy above likes to take them so he advised me to put something in front of the window but then, nobody ever came."

It was your way to tell him you appreciated he tried to think of your comfort, wasn't it?

"If you are sure, I rather like walking them. I got one of those window locks, I found them on a website and they are really handy. I just prefer it because the dog from the lady on the third floor, he hates me," he admitted.

It seemed to amuse you: "Not surprised, you remind me of a cat or maybe more of a fox? Mh, I love them equally, pick the one you prefer." You rushed ahead while he took the bags, rubbing a hand over his face. Ah, it was a talent of yours, wasn't it? Making him blush.

Thankfully, it wasn't too far from the building and Hongjoong got up all the bags in no time.

"Do you want to come in?" your offer showed a hint of hesitation and Hongjoong was overworrying again. Would it be strange to accept it? Was he too keen on showing how he really would like it?

"Sure, I have some time until nightfall. I have to update some of the designs, they finally accepted two of them," he made sure not to stare, not only to be polite but he already had seen your apartment when he broke in last time.

You opened the fridge and offered him a bottle of cool water, one he gladly accepted. "You said, you do like computer things... Don't mind me, I do not know a whole lot about it. I admit, when I was here last time, I thought you might be a gamer."

His Ex used to watch Twitch streams, something about finding them relaxing.

He regretted the question the instant he asked because of how your expressions slipped.

"Ah, you could say I used to enjoy gaming? It was something I did with a ... former friend." The way you reacted hinted likely it must have been a really good friend, or why else would you look so hurt about saying such a thing` Friendships ended so often, yet this one must have meant a lot to you.

Hongjoong tried not to read too much into your expressions, he did not know you well enough to have a right of doing so, likely just misreading it.

"I am sorry to hear. My friends and family weren't always so keen on my obsession with working for book illustrations either. I would not say they meant to tell me to instead work a proper job but they thought, I should just work for some big company that needs them for ads and such but that is just so soulless, you know?"

His confession was too honest but he felt comfortable with you, sharing it. Maybe it really was because you were strangers and you did not know him or his past, you wouldn't judge him based on that.

He prayed you'd not. You seemed to think about it before saying with the kindest smile: "Following your dreams is important, Hongjoong. I get that, families always mean well but sometimes, we have to figure things out on our own."

He was too nervous to offer a good answer.

"Anyway!" the quick smile was forced but he accepted it. "You said, you know how to get up on the roof? I was thinking, we could do it tonight? It sounds silly but there will be a star shower... I do not think we can see it in a city like this but we can pretend to! I shopped for some snacks, we can make it our own little event."

Hongjoong blinked, eyes big when you invited him: "Oh! Sure! I can make some time, just knock on my window!" He did not have the time based on the deadline... but he would get it done for you! Sounded like time to fight the habit of sleeping in and work during sunlight hours for a change.

"Awesome, I'm excited then!"

There was not too much else to be said it seemed, your thoughts clearly elsewhere, and Hongjoong could only guess it was because of your friend.

The illustrator spent an hour trying to pick an outfit. Tanktop, skinny jeans, some jewelry, he even picked a barret he hadn't worn in ages but it seemed the best way to deal with his hair, even his nails were repainted before he climbed up and prepared a small cozy corner, a blanket, two pillows and a few LED candles.

By the time you knocked on his window, he was almost terrified he made it look too much like a date but then, he looked at you and it seemed, you had a similar mindset. You looked stunning, and the backpack hinted you got more than a few snacks.

"You look amazing," Hongjoong complimented, he liked your style. "Sush, you sure you aren't a model and just failed to tell me?" You brought up the cliche line but it made him laugh: "Well, I tried."

As he joined you, he led you up the stairs which ended abruptly. "If you pull here, there is actually a hidden ladder," he explained and showed it to you. "Very handy, and you can simply pull it up from up there so nobody sees it."

You seemed amazed just how simple it was and carefully climbed up first.

"Oh Hongjoong, this is so pretty!" you gasped, looking at his little setup. The sun vanished just a little while ago and the candles created a nice atmosphere.

"Well, how often does one get invited to star gazing at my age? I thought it would be nice," he explained, chewing his lip as he helped you take off the backpack.

"Well, I guess it is good then I brought an entire picnic!" Indeed, you did but it wasn't just snacks, you prepared the meal obviously yourself and it made him wonder. Did anyone other than his mother ever do this for him?

"This looks delicious!" he clapped his hands together, looking over it.

"Mh, I cannot promise the taste can live up to the looks because it has been a while since I made most of these dishes," you admitted and offered him a pair of chopsticks but he shook his head: "It already smells great, and nothing can betray that."

You seemed to enjoy how expressive Hongjoong was in showing just how much he loved your cooking. His face did not manage to hide it but it was to no surprise, not only because it was tasty but because he had been living off ramyun for the past couple of months due to his cut salary.

"This is so good, I will vote for you as home cook of the year," he mumbled between trying to chew and swallowing.

"Hongjoong, are you sure you ate in the past month or two? You are eating like you were about to starve," you smiled but there was a little concern in your voice as you ate slowly.

The artist carefully placed his chopsticks aside, contemplating if it was okay to be so honest but since he already shared quite a bit with you, it seemed fair.

"To be honest, I came here a little unplanned. I got this really amazing deal or it sounded like that but the publisher CEO lady has rejected all of my designs of the past few months and they cut my salary in half every time. I get around with some savings but food wasn't on top of my priority list."

Now you did seem concerned and sighed: "You know what? She is stupid! I looked up your work and it's so cute? I mean it! I know nothing about that business branch but I like it, they are cute and as a kid, I'd have loved them but also... I used to share a place with somebody and I have a hard time getting rid of the habit of cooking more than I need. How about you come over here and then, and pick up the rest? I hate to throw away so much."

Did you look him up? Oh, that was unexpected. Hongjoong was just looking at you in awe and you seemed a little confused by it.

"You do not have to, of course!" It seemed you both were good at misreading.

He hurried to wave his hands: "Oh no! I'd love that! I just... was a little shy when you looked it up. I appreciate it. If you ever need a doodle or like ... anything drawn, let me know. I like doing it for people."

As he looked at you somehow, it felt like you two were the same. Something happened which brought you here, leaving behind a very different life but now that you sat in front of him like that, Hongjoong was so grateful and he tried to place the meaning of his heart beating just a little too enthusiastically right now.

"You know, when I was in high school, I was befriended with this really amazing guy, Hwa. He moved away with his parents before graduation but after exams, when we both knew we screwed up really badly. He would drag me up to the rooftop of our school and play silly songs from the early 2000s we danced to. I know that sounds insane but how about... we do that?"

Hongjoong didn't think about Seonghwa in a long time. He tried to find him online a few years ago but it seemed the older did not think too much about social media either.

"You want to dance?" you chuckled and checked your phone: "Well, I'd say we have another hour until the promised star shower so let's do it. You will have to provide the music tho, I forgot to close my Spotify on my computer."

Hongjoong grinned: "No worries, I got us."

It was funny but he remembered the song and there was an entire playlist dedicated to the vibe he wanted to go for. Relaxed and soft, a little silly but not embarrassing. He ensured the volume wouldn't cause too much attention but you did not seem to care at all.

When the melody and the lyrics began you just let go. Hongjoong swallowed as he watched you and for the first time in a long time, suddenly he was feeling... excited? It was different from a grand job offer or moving, it was more like that telling himself life would go on actually was real. That good things still would happen if he just kept on going.

"What are you waiting for? Don't tell me you are getting shy now," you moved closer to him, taking his hands without hesitation before starting to dance together. The shuffle was doing a good job because it went from energetic, leading to the two of you just silly jumping and vibing to something a little slower and before he knew it, his arms were curled around your figure and you rested your head against his shoulder as you moved with the music.

"This is nice," you whispered, your gaze seemed to be far off in the distance. "I forgot how nice it can be just like that." You sighed deeply without saying anything else but Hongjoong quietly agreed as his hug tightened a little. "It really is."

It was only when your phone started to ring and you withdrew that he was a little disappointed. "Okay, time for the stars!" you smiled, looking around before glancing back at the blanket. "Let's do it like we are in the countryside!"

Without hesitation, you grabbed a pillow and laid down, looking up to the sky which was just dark, the light of electricity stealing the beauty of the night. Hongjoong laid down next to you, looking up.

"Isn't this the most beautiful night sky you have ever seen?" you gasped, pointing towards nothing: "There they are! Okay, time to make your wish but remember, you can't tell anyone!"

You were so bright and outgoing, Hongjoong envied you but also quietly was thankful how you tickled this out of him again. Even before his breakup, he had been so busy struggling with work and expectations, when did he act so carefree for the last time?

"Working on the wish," he whispered and closed his eyes.

His wish for life never changed: be happy, together with people who truly loved and cherished him and he'd do the same for them.

He winced when he felt your cool hand reaching out, squeezing him and his head turned around, the beret slipped from his hair as your gazes locked. There was another moment of hesitation but you rolled onto your side, your eyes saying what words did not manage but they did not need to as you slowly closed them. Hongjoong's hand was placed on your cheek and you met in the middle into a tender kiss.

It was nothing breathtaking like in the movies, much more a kiss between students who never kissed before but yet, were so lost in the moment that they didn't worry. It only lasted for a little before your lips parted: "Guess, my wish already came true just now."

Hongjoong blushed, he wanted to say more but there was a small quacking sound. The two of you sat up immediately.

"Did you hear that?" you whispered. Hongjoong nodded: "Nobody ever comes up here and I come here almost every day since I moved in." You exchanged a few gazes before carefully standing up, following him closely, hiding behind the chimney.

Suddenly, a large figure dressed all in black jumped up like a ninja in a movie. You gasped but Hongjoong just blinked.

"Wooyoung?!"

"Wooyoung?"

"Wooyoung!"

San's figure showed up right behind his best friend, who was tugging on his jacket, clearly catching his breath. "I told you not to do this!" The younger man was just grinning: "But I had to make sure I left an impression!"

You chuckled as Hongjoong pointed to you that it was okay.

"I take it those are your friends?"

The word made Hongjoong blink. He saw these two idiots almost on a daily base now, he talked to them and while he never shared any personal details, they never treated him like other customers or a stranger.

He really did a great job on distancing, didn't he? Considering he claimed to have nobody but just made friends without realizing it.

"Something like that," Hongjoong said with a quick smile but Wooyoung already pulled him closer, pressing his cheek against his. "Sh, he is just shy! We are the best buddies!"

Hongjoong yelped and now was sparring with Wooyoung while San rubbed a hand over the back of his neck: "Sorry, we didn't mean to interrupt your date. Wooyoung has a hard time keeping his curiosity in check."

You hummed, knowing Hongjoong didn't hear it. Maybe it was for the better.

"That's okay. Actually, that's what I like about him. He's chaotic, just like me."

You clasped your hands together, cheering. "So Wooyoung! We got some food left, are you hungry?"

The younger stopped, grinning: "Always!"

Hongjoong groaned when he was woken up by loud noises coming from the staircase. He rolled onto his side, face lit up by his phone screen. It wasn't even seven but for some reason, it seemed neighbors decided to make a fuss. There was screaming, he was sure about that.

He grabbed a pair of sneakers, not caring too much about all else and decided to have a look because it seemed a little too loud considering you and an elderly woman lived the floor underneath.

The moment he recognized your voice, Hongjoong stopped all logical thinking, he took two stairs at once to face a very upstyled woman around his age. Expensive brands and overdone makeup, there was an envelope open, torn paper on the ground, and you were all in tears.

"What's going on?!" Hongjoong rushed to your side but you barely seemed to recognize him.

"How did you even find out where I live?! I won't sign this just go!" you yelled and it seemed to make the woman just more angry.

"___, stop being so stubborn! Just sign the damn rights! You are not part of the team anymore, you have no use for the brand name! Just sign it and we never have to meet again!"

By now, more neighbors had come and the least Hongjoong wanted for you was to deal with the police.

"Hey, get in. I will take care of it," he whispered to you, both of his hands on your cheeks to force you to look at him through teary eyes. It was when you finally realized you weren't alone, you swallowed hard, nodded but carefully withdrew. When the woman tried to get in, Hongjoong pushed her back.

"If you do not leave now, we will call the police! If you have any needs, use a lawyer!" he remembered how his mother watched those shows when he was little, they always just yelled about lawyers.

"Who are you? Loverboy? God, how can one person fall so low? Living in this shithole and now this?" she hissed, spitting on the ground before leaving. Hongjoong waited to ensure she'd not get back up before he slipped inside, closing your door.

You had curled up on your bed and he was a little overwhelmed but it did not matter. Hongjoong called out your name gently as he sat down on the edge of the bed, wanting to make sure you knew he was there, maybe his way of asking for permission.

When you did not move, he curled his arms around you to pull you tight like back on the rooftop, hand gently patting over your back. He wasn't going to tell you it would be okay or ask you to stop crying because he knew that sometimes, mind or body did not want to, couldn't.

All one needed sometimes, was a hug and somebody there with you.

It was hard to say just how much time passed when you turned around slowly. Hongjoong loosened the hug a little without moving back and you looked at him.

"You do not have to tell me anything," he assured in his soft voice but you shook your head slowly. "I want to... it just... it's embarrassing."

This time, it was he who shook his head: "Nothing that makes you feel sad ever is embarrassing, ___. Your feelings matter, you know?"

He was relieved to see it brought a little smile to your lips.

"You know, that also is true for you. If you are sad... it's okay. I understand it. Please don't feel like you have to hide it."

So you did look right through him after all: "You got me there... It is hard to admit weakness... I guess, for me at least. I was hurt by the people I cared for the most. Now, it is hard, like how to let them in again, how to trust?"

Your fingers gently reached out, brushing over his cheeks and he held still like if he moved, you might vanish into thin air.

"I get that," you admitted. "You see, that woman used to be my best friend since middle school. A few years ago, we started to stream together for fun. I made good money with my job, so I bought the equipment and I really was okay playing more of a background role. We worked on it together but she was the star, I didn't mind she also streamed a lot without me but then, numbers rose and there was a sponsorship she did not tell me about. One day, I got home from my office, and all the equipment was gone, together with my best friend. I was locked out of the accounts, the savings I kept at home for emergencies were stolen, and well. She spread some nasty rumors about how I was jealous and things got ugly... So I moved here. It is hard, your best friend is usually the person you rely on for comfort when something awful happens but now, there was nobody and I am stupid, the type of person that fully believes in a friendship."

It was sad, to think how money always ruined everything, love and friendship. Hongjoong watched you as you spoke, going more into the details and he made sure to listen well, to show you that he didn't only do it because you two kissed or because of you crying. He really cared about you and wanted to understand you better so he did not have to fear again, that imagine of you alone on the fire escape.

"There is nothing awkward or embarrassing about your feelings. You trusted and lost her. You tried your best to start over, leave it behind but she cannot let it be for selfish reasons," Hongjoong concluded and you finally relaxed.

"Thank you for listening.... that really helped," you whispered. "I... if you ever want to..."

Hongjoong wondered for a moment. Did he want to talk about it?

Yes, but...

"Honestly, I am not sure if I am really ready yet to talk about it but one day... I will," he promised and placed a gentle kiss on top of your head.

"How about I make you some tea?" he offered with a smile as you looked at him, you nodded and you two slowly sat up. Hongjoong was very determined to wrap you properly in a blanket burrito, ruffling your hair gently before moving over to your kitchen. He could feel your eyes on him as he moved but he did not mind it.

A few minutes later, he handed you a cup of yasmin tea and you hugged it carefully, sipping on it.

"You make a very cute blanket cat," he teased, hoping to cheer you up. "Maybe one day, you will let me draw you like that." And finally, there it was, your beautiful laugh. "I will think about it."

Hongjoong sat down by your side, he turned on the TV and you relaxed against him as you watched a random show just to get your mind off and sipped your tea. It wasn't until there was a more gentle knock on the door and the familiar voice of the elderly lady.

"I will get it," he offered and rushed over. She seemed a little concerned: "My, so much noise in the early morning. Such an unpleasant woman. I wanted to see if everything is alright but I also noted, that your door is wide open Mister Kim."

His cheeks flushed as he realized, he rushed out earlier without bringing his key or closing it. "OH! Yes, thank you so much," he bowed and it made her chuckle: "You are very welcome. Fear not, Mister Corner on the second floor left his dog outside, I have no doubt nobody will dare to make the way upstairs today."

As she wiggled away, Hongjoong turned around but you smiled. "It is okay, I am feeling better. Thank you for looking out for me. I will see you later?"

He did not want to go but it likely was a good idea to give you some space. "Count on it."

As much as he hated it, he needed to put some time into work if he intended to finish everything within the deadline but now that Hongjoong had a reason to work extra hard, he was doing it no problem and within a few hours, he finished a few sketches. Those would do for angry CEO and he could dedicate his evening toward you.

He was taking his phone from his charger when he noticed a small notification. Hongjoong turned off such with the exception of receiving one when somebody new followed him. To his surprise, the name of his latest follower was 'Hwastar' and there was only one person who would use something like that.

It took him a few minutes to remember his password, he ignored all other messages other than the one of the follow and he followed back. Within a few minutes, a message popped up. It really was Seonghwa and to Hongjoong's surprise, the man was in New York, asking to meet.

When Hongjoong knocked on your door and you did not answer, he guessed you were asleep and he decided to go for it. Seonghwa had picked a cute coffee shop, something that suited him. While he looked the same, he was yet a whole new man. Tall, well-built and stylish, the long hair suited him well but the smile was as gentle as when they saw each other for the last time. "Joong! It's been too long!"

There was a quick hug before they sat down, he was sipping on a drink. "You look good, Joongie!" Hongjoong glanced down, he barely could say he wore anything unique but then, he just really had gotten used to his style. "Not like you who seems to go to fashion week."

Seonghwa blushed a little before waving his hand: "Nah, I work for a small publisher." Hongjoong wasn't surprised to hear it. Seonghwa always loved to read and was great with all kinds of people "That's great! I am glad it worked out for you."

His old friend smiled before to the younger's surprise, he pulled out one of the children's books Hongjoong worked on as part of a team.

"I only recently moved to New York because we moved our office here. When I walked through some bookstores, I came across this one. I am glad to see you still do art... When I went home last time, my mom said you left and nobody really knew where you went."

So he did hear about it, huh?

"Breakups can be ugly, I guess I wanted to start over." Hongjoong finally said what he had not to anyone until now. It was hard to say it out loud because that way, there was no chance to deny it, to hide the truth about the why, and how it had come to this. Maybe because there was this old trust he had for Hwa that made him say it out loud now but it was impossible to hide the bitterness in his voice.

Seonghwa had an understanding, sad smile on his lips: "I know you loved her. You two already dated back then... but Hongjoong... I am also proud you are moving on, and didn't stop."

It really was difficult to let negative emotions take over when Seonghwa looked at him like that. He pulled out his business card: "I know you are currently working with a bigger name but we actually finally expanded to books that require some illustrations and my boss would love to meet you. Why don't you think about it? The offer is there, no expiration, whenever you want."

Hongjoong accepted it with surprise, looking at the cursive font he was sure was inspired by his friend's handwriting.

How did things finally fall in line? Was it because he was ready to let them?

Hongjoong looked up and smiled: "I will definitely call."

When he came back, it had gotten dark. As Hongjoong took the fire escape up, your window was wide open and you sat on the stairs, the wind playing with your hair and you seemed lost in thoughts but the moment you saw him, the way you smiled, he knew.

His heart finally exhaled, it held its breath for so long, scared of what would happen if it let go of all that was and no longer would be.

Now it knew it was okay. Breathing would hurt for a little while but eventually, the beat would fall back in line as it should. Painful memories remained but it would keep beating.

The wisdom wasn't wrong, life went on.

Hongjoong smiled back as you made space for him and he got comfortable, his gaze wandering over the cityscape of New York or the bit you managed to get from here.

"it really is ugly, isn't it? I mean, all we get to see are the lower side of those giant ass buildings;" you joked and he laughed, shaking his head: "No, we do not but we have the rooftop. Not that I mind this."

He closed his eyes: "It really is a great escape, I would say, we need those stairs everywhere in the world."

You hummed: "I agree. Just that we need little stickers on the windows, one that tells us that if the alarm won't go off and the windows open, just throw a shoe or something."

Hongjoong smiled innocently at you: "But how do I get my shoe back then?"

You grinned: "Well, by knocking, of course. Then, I have an excuse to invite you in."

You did not need an excuse, he gladly would come and visit you. As you looked at each other, a certain silence spread, and Hongjoong played with one of his bracelets.

"I got my heart broken very badly," he admitted. "I guess, I was blind? Maybe I just was so in a habit of having it that way, that I did not think it could change? It hurt a lot and I ran like a coward but now, maybe this is just how I am. Sometimes, I do stupid things that turn out to be good but I am also blind like needing forever to realize how I made friends just by being myself or that I can feel again."

As he looked at you, turning around, you suddenly hugged him tightly. "It is okay, you do not have to tell me everything, ever or just take your time. I will be here, whenever you are ready," you whispered and Hongjoong was surprised.

Argh, he hated how tears started to dwell up at the corners of his eyes. This was all he wanted for so long but now, here you were and you were so much more than comfort, the promise of a future where his heart was beating not only to live but love. Again.

"I really like you," he admitted, voice soft and husky. "I like you too," you repeated and for a moment, you just held each other.

Hongjoong looked at you before he swallowed: "I'd like to see where it goes... but I might... need a bit of time before I am ready to go all ..."

You placed an index finger on his lips and smiled: "It's okay. We have all the time in the world. Summer is not over yet, many nights on the rooftops. Then, when autumn comes, we go chase leaves in Central Park, and in Winter, we can wear big fluffy coats and share a scarf. Then Spring, we plant flowers on the rooftop, and when Summer comes again. We will be here, together. Close or as friends, I will be here, count on it."

You really were so dreamy, it made sense now why your room looked the way it did.

And he loved how you were bold and silly and this.

"I cannot promise not to be spontaneous, and I might would like us to be more than friends," he admitted and you smirked: "I love random and wild."

You squeezed his hand and Hongjoong was looking forward to all seasons. In this lonely city full of people but now he had friends, old and new but most of all, you.

As you leaned in to kiss him, your alarm was going off. Hongjoong groaned but you tugged on his jacket.

"Sh, you can throw shampoo at it later," you promised and Hongjoong laughed.

"This alarm, it drives me insane," he whispered, your lips so close.

"So do you."

In the best way possible.

[inbarfink]

Okay, I’ve been considering it for quite a bit and I think that if Tumblr existed in Japanifornia… most of us would probably not be aware of the series’ main characters.

Like, lawyers just don’t tend to be high-profile publicly-known figures. Even within True Crime communities or the coverage of high-public-interest cases, people don’t tend to focus on the lawyers as much more than a representative of the defendant and the legal system as a whole. And yeah, you can say this is just because real-life lawyers are Boring and if they did the kind of Bonkers Shit AA Lawyers do we would pay attention to them… but we do actually have textual evidence that Japanifornia treats lawyers not-too-differently than real life.

Mia’s murder, and probably the uncovering of all of Bluecorp’s dirty dealing, was highly talked about, but Phoenix’s actions in court went kinda ignored. And note that this is the case where Phoenix literally defended himself and broke the Demon Prosecutor’s five years winning streak, and that wasn’t enough to draw eyes to his part in this whole case. 

And that’s also generally consistent with how characters treat Phoenix throughout the rest of the games. By the AJ Trilogy era, it’s clear that Phoenix has made quite a name for himself… in the legal world. If you are yourself a lawyer or another sort of legal professional or just unusually interested in court proceeding, you know the name ‘Phoenix Wright’ 

But if you’re just a regular person who cares about the law the Regular Amount, you probably have no idea who this is.

So I’d guess most of Japanifornian Tumblr would probably be aware of a lot of the cases in the games, especially considering how many of them concern, like, corporate corruption and organized crime and legal corruption and international politics and the entertainment industry and other such stuff that makes it likely to get national/international news coverage. And also so many of them are so bizarre and wacky and are thus prime meme fodder…

But most people wouldn’t necessarily know the name of the lawyer the Nickel Samurai blackmailed to defend him after he ordered an assassin to kill the Jammin’ Ninja, or even how involved that lawyer actually was in Matt Engarde’s downfall.

But there would probably be a small mini-fandom of Tumblrina Lawyers and other legal nerds who are ABSOLUTELY obsessed with the WAA, and trying to collect any piece of info they can find about their adventures. 

(That’s also another aspect to consider, the general public in Japanifornia does not have full knowledge of everything we get to see in the game. News coverage of the smaller cases would be extremely minimal and very regional - and even the bigger cases probably won’t give you a full line-by-line record of everything that happened in Court. Apollo Justice was, like, the Biggest Phoenix Wright Stan in the Universe and he had very choppy and partial knowledge of the Gramarye Trial. We have to consider that even folks who are trying to keep track of the AA Lawyers in-universe would not get the full picture from the media. And that’s before we get into fake news and rumors.)

And meanwhile, the rest of Tumblr would probably treat that Fandom the same sort of bemused delight we give to, like, the extremely dedicated gimmick blogs. Like, you’d probably see less posts about Phoenix and Co. as you’d see posts memeing about the fact there’s a Tumblr Fandom for ‘some random law agency in Japanifornia’, they’d be like five thousands people in the notes going “There’s a Tumblr Fandom for WHAT? WHY IS THIS THE FIRST TIME I’M HEARING ABOUT THIS??” and then one person from the WAA fandom going “NO YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THIS IS THE GUY WHO UNCOVERED THE PHANTOM HE’S JUMPED OFF A BURNING BRIDGE ONCE YOU LITERALLY TALKED ABOUT A TRIAL HE DID YESTERDAY YOU JUST DON’T KNOW HE WAS INVOLVED”. 

Now, that’s all for the Defense Attorneys. The Prosecutors have a bit more publicity. I mean, Phoenix literally heard about Prosecutor Edgeworth on the news.

But also… I do think this publicity is highly regional. Like, Phoenix ended up stumbling on newspaper coverage of Miles because he lives in the same city as him. I’m guessing that most of the series’ Prosecutors are at least casually known not just to Legal Folks, but also generally to people within Los Angetokyo and people involved in Japanifornian Politics… but also not much outside of that sphere either. Again, the series does establish that they are not that well-known amongst laypeople even when they are famous amongst other lawyers

And are generally recognized by fellow legal professionals and journalists and people involved in criminal activity. So the situation with them won’t be that different than with the WAA, they might be a tad more high-profile, depending on how many Tumblr users are specifically from Japaniforina and wanna make memes about the local politics… but those who will get really invested in their misadventures won’t be that different from the kind of people who’d get really into Phoenix Wright. 

Klavier is the obvious exception. Like most Famous Lawyers, he’s actually primarily famous for something other than law. It’s just that in his case, instead of politics, it’s being a world-famous rock star. There’s plenty of textual evidence that the Gavinners are an actual household name and they’d probably have a pretty sizable Tumblr Fandom, but… well… while I assume any casual Gavinner fan knows that Klavier is also a Prosecutor, I’d guess only the insanely dedicated fans and the Haters looking for something problematic would actually start digging into the records of the cases he worked on. But then again, Tumblr does have a lot of insanely dedicated fans and Haters, so maybe Legal Misadventures Involving Klavier would be kinda mainstream on Japanifornia Tumblr.

[bonebabbles]

Ivypool's Heart: Finished

Just completed reading the new super edition! I'm pleasantly surprised by this one. Overall, this was a very good book, MUCH better than the past 3 which were some of the most boring and unnecessary entries to the entire franchise.

If you were on the fence about this one, I'd recommend it. Just take this warning; it does the Warrior Cats thing where it harps pretty strong on parenthood and nuclear families being a borderline essential part of life, including a ton of bashing on how uniquely horrible this makes the Sisters.

If you can get past that, it's a pretty solid story about grief that makes some really fun additions to the WC lore, including the wildcats, StormClan, and a broad expansion to the afterlife system.

Meandering thoughts below the cut;

One of IPH's biggest flaws is pacing, but it's not nearly as bad as the past 3 SEs.

Not to mention, this is a pretty small SE. If you're ever bored, it won't last long.

Before the book introduces the Wildcats, it REALLY meanders. It'll pick up, but you will have to wade through relatively uninteresting scenes of the cats traveling and talking about their feelings unprompted.

A lot of "quicktime events" happen out of nowhere to fill pages with cats running away from random bullshit.

There's a horse carriage, an apple picker, dogs, weasels, foxes, a storm, traffic, humans, boats, sandwhiches. It's endless. My eyes glazed over during most of these scenes.

I know a lot of people were dreading Ivypool being nasty and unreasonable during this book, but honestly? I was hoping for it and didn't really receive it.

I find her most compelling when she's holding a grudge, acting on her anger, and generally working through messy issues. But aside from her just thinking about being annoyed or angry, she's really not snappy at all.

I feel like there could have been a lot more interesting and organic conflict between Icewing, Dovewing, and Ivypool's personalities instead of boring Quicktime Events. In fact, I felt like Icewing and Dovewing were kind of underutilized.

The conversations often feel quite stiff, especially in the first half. Everyone is very understanding of each other, respect boundaries and knows not to push too far, resolve their personal issues very easily, etc. It's kinda... unnatural.

Personally, I found that disappointing because I WANTED to see the cats actually process their grief over the course of the book. Watch them act out, maybe get in an fight or two and resolve it for the sake of the mission, have them come to a greater understanding of each other, etc.

Because Icewing and Dovewing are both so motherly and gentle and we're in Ivypool's POV, we don't really get to see them process their grief because of that.

They're not TOTALLY neglected though! I just... wanted more from this group.

However. I wanted LESS Rootspring.

I understand he's there to process the loss of Bristlefrost with Ivypool but god, every time he was on screen I wanted to push him aside and talk to Icewing lmao.

Stop trying to sell me "cool, mellowed from grief" Rootspring. He's a silly little hyperactive man and you will never be able to convince me otherwise.

As a silly little hyperactive semi-manthing myself, it would have been a lot more cathartic to see a clown like me going through grief. Not to mention just generally make for better chemistry with the group.

Between Ice and Dove who are already quite chill as characters, Whistle could have used someone more goofy to bounce off of.

I REALLY didn't like the whole implication that Rootspring is going to move on from Bristlefrost and "find a mother" for the kittens he wants so badly, though.

Erins PLEASE remember that adoption exists. He does not need a wife to be a dad. I'm beaming myself directly into your brains and telepathy-ing directions to the nearest cat adoption agency

aaaaaand on that note.... yeah. I did not like the way that this book leaned so hard on the whole "nuclear family" dynamic. Ivypool has had like two major interactions with her husband and one JUST happened in this book.

It especially bugged me that they leaned into Ivypool having been a very active mother, when we saw very little of that in the ACTUAL book. It wasn't even mentioned that Fernsong was allegedly the primary parent of the kittens when they were young.

But... I was able to look past it and just accept the book in a vacuum. There's a lot of good here.

Like the wildcats.

While I'm still wary of these being Scottish Wildcats and reserve my misgivings about the misuse of species that are very unlike domestic cats... I LOOOOVEEE the culture they've set up for them

I LOVEE the way that individual spirits reach out to the kits, guiding them through life

I LOVE the connection to StormClan

I LOVE their idea of the elements and general spirituality

And I LOVED the fact that a big part of Ivypool coming to terms with her grief was the expansion of her worldview. The way that she realized the religion she was raised with is quite small, and that there is an immense beauty in coming to understand other cultures, accept their advice, and see the world as they do.

I just wish the book had been able to tie that to a flaw that Ivypool has expressed since her very introduction back in OotS-- that she's smallminded.

It would have been a FANTASTIC way to really tackle and address that flaw, and pay off literal decades of set up. I really wish she had been messier in this book because of that!

But, digressing.

I'm over the moon that the team's actually playing with the series' spirituality! After such a long time of them outright avoiding some of the weirder elements in the series, like Rock and Midnight, it's exciting that they're finding some freedom in making new magic lore for themselves.

Hopefully, in the next few super editions, we'll be able to get some more insight to StormClan and the Wildcats.

The book really hits its stride in the second half because of this, and the ending chapters are actually fantastic. Some of the best stuff that's come out of the series (on purpose) in a loooong time.

[lotus-pear]

Writing a complex character such as Dazai is actually really hard even for people who understand him because he is, as you said, extremely unpredictable. I don't know exactly what to tell you, but I'll try to help a little bit!

The whole thing about Dazai is that he doesn't understand humanity. He understands the basics and why people do what they do because he is analytical and has been studying people's behavior and human connections forever. But he doesn't feel connected with humanity and empathy the same way other people do. He perceives others from like, the other side of a barrier. He studies them carefully. Manages to care about them deeply sometimes. Even deeper when they're able to see him and get to him (Odasaku, Atsushi, Chuuya, the whole agency in fact means something to him). But there's always this layer of disconnection and apathy and emptiness he doesn't know how to get rid of. It's like he cares, but he actually doesn't because he rationalizes everything and turns it into a game of chess, more or less? And I think that frustrates him. He isn't used to caring about people because he doesn't understand them, but he takes an interest in the people he finds amusing to study and once he cares deeply, they're taken away from him (that's why he mourns and regrets Oda's death so much. He feels like the world takes everything away from him the second he manages to feel human). Hence the whole thing about not feeling human (amongst other things). He cares and yet he is realistic. He has regrets and suffers and feels pain and he can care about others (ignore all the people who keep portraying him as an emotionless monster, please) but he doesn't drown in self-pity when it comes to all the people he has killed and his past because he can rationalize that. It was another era. He has moved on. And if it's for the greater good of the mission or his journey to find something to live for, he doesn't care how many random people he has to kill (when he was younger he valued other people's lives way less, of course. Now that has changed because his apathy is something he doesn't turn into cruelty and instead uses to rationalize plans and help the world and the agency. Basically, when he was part of the mafia it was kind of "I don't give a fuck about random people" because he genuinely didn't feel anything for them, but now, even if he doesn't genuinely care for them, he protects even random people because that's what the image of kindness Oda had planned for him). Oda tells him that, if the good side and the bad one are the same and he hasn't found anything to live for yet, why not help the world while he's at it? And it's such a beautiful thought because Dazai has this issue with understanding humanity and making bonds. But he understands, now more than ever after Oda's death, what living and killing means. He might not actually care that much for society and its well-being, but maybe he can find something to live for in the light more than he would in the darkness. He keeps wanting to kill himself, right? He keeps trying. But he doesn't actually want to. It's common sense. If he truly wanted to, he already would've done it. "I don't like pain" is the most common thing to say when you don't actually want to do it. I think that, unlike Nikolai, who actually craves to die as a representation of freedom, Dazai only wants to keep trying and trying to find a reason for living. Chuuya was that thing when he was in the Mafia. Chuuya and Oda, because Chuuya is quite literally his soulmate (in the sense of bringing amusement to his life and also making him feel human, as his ability is the only thing that can help Chuuya. And also Chuuya not being human but being the most empathetic and emotional of all the people Dazai has met in the mafia) and Oda was the first one to actually understand him and see him for who he is, something I don't think he'll ever find again and that's why Oda's death fucked him up so bad. He found a place to belong and somebody to live for, and then he dies and leaves him alone? It's not fair, but he'll try to fight for good and live in the light if that's what Oda wanted for him. As if Oda knew him better than he knows himself because I also think he has a hard time with his own perception and personality.

In simpler words: Dazai has a hard time understanding humanity because he feels disconnected from it by a layer of apathy and the fact that he doesn't understand basic human needs/actions because he doesn't share them. One of the things that makes us human is desires, right? Wanting. Loving. Longing. Dazai rejects all of that because he doesn't know what he wants and nothing he tries ends up making him feel whole. In "No Longer Human", actually, you can read things like "It is almost impossible for me to converse with other people" and "I have never known what it means to be hungry / Eat or die, the saying goes, but to my ears, it sounded like just one more unpleasant threat". So he isn't a monster, his brain just functions in a different way. He sees everything. Analyzes every little thing. He's smarter than everybody else and he's aware of that, but he feels lonely there and only wants somebody to understand or something to fight for. Oda gave him both things, and the agency gave him a reason to keep going because he genuinely cares about doing good and keeping them safe. I don't think Dazai's journey has ended, because he still fights against.... So many things with himself. His past. His future. His desires. But at least now he has a thing to enjoy and bring him happiness. His constant act of being "silly" isn't that much of a facade. I mean, I think it is because if he acts like a clown, nobody will ever see the true self he hides. But I think he ends up having fun with the agency and annoying Chuuya because he sees them respond to his behavior and he finds it amusing. I think being extremely smart and lonely and tormented can coexist with being fun sometimes.

As per writing in his POV.... It depends on what you want to write, really. I think his brain functions differently depending on his mood. I guess the most important thing is to keep in mind his surroundings because he's always hyperaware of every little thing. But it frustrates him not knowing how he's feeling or not understanding what he actually truly needs, often focusing on others instead of looking into himself, because every time he does, he only finds himself empty and craving for something he doesn't know what it is. In his worst moments, I think it's quite obvious he tries to fix things with distractions and impulsive actions like substance abuse. In his more analytical moments, it's when he becomes more apathetic and sees the world as his game of chess and people as only pawns. He knows he's human, he just doesn't feel like it. Fyodor has a sense of superiority Dazai doesn't share. He's smarter because his brain functions differently, but he is no God. He is no entity. He analyzes from the POV of somebody external to humanity but knowing quite well he isn't God. And when he's having genuine fun and feeling some type of care/love? I think he's grateful. The emptiness is always there, though. Always haunting him. In the back of his brain. But he sees hope in Atsushi and a place to keep his promise in the agency and maybe fulfill his heart. He might always have a fucked up perception of himself, but at least he's aware that doing the right thing fills the hole in his chest more than tormenting others. As I said, he likes it there (and Chuuya) because it makes him experience humanity even if he keeps telling himself he isn't human (No Longer Human quote: "You miss her, don't you?" / "Yes." / "That's human nature, I guess").

I don't know if I helped you?? I think it's a bit of a mess, sorry 😭 It's like 3am and I don't know if what I said makes any sense, but I really hope I was able to help you!

holy FUCK it took me fifteen minutes to read all of this and i'm glad i did because this is the most succinct and articulate analysis i have ever seen of dazai's underlying nature and his ambitions in relevance to the plot OP I THINK IF ASIGIRI CANT WRITE ANYMORE YOU SHOULD TAKE OVER BSD MANGA BC I THINK U UNDERSTAND DAZAI BETTER THAN HE DOES SOMETIMES TBH💀💀 aaaa jkjk i digress you were so real for bringing up the yozo/dazai parallels bc there's genuinely so many and if i still had my fucking BOOK :side eye: i could go through the intricate and profound commentary i left in the margins but alas my dear friend insists on keeping it longer. there's nothing more i can say on this topic bc i agree w you on everything wholeheartedly i think you deserve a scholarship to harvard or smth bc god DAMN you would slay as a lit or lang major

[miquellah]

i personally hate “mohg was actually always completely innocent, and the blood cult stuff was only ever because of miquella’s charm” because. well. it defangs mohg entirely. and again, i always thought he was sympathetic even before we knew he was charmed at all

BUT ALSO. i think it also really kind of breaks the real interesting parts of his character, usually more or less for the sake of painting miquella as someone evil through and through. like, the impetus of mohg’s whole involvement IS “was it justified for miquella to use him to achieve his own goals, even if this guy had done fucked up and evil stuff himself?”

and the answer is of course. no. or at least thats what’s posited by the game’s narrative. but without mohg having done fucked-up shit of his own volition, where’s the bite? at all? there’s like, no moral dilemma here, miquella would just be an asshole through and through. and THAT would be a retcon from base game

also i think its fine to enjoy a character like mohg even if he was a blood cultist and doing so willingly. like we all agree thats dope as hell. idk case in point its not only a disservice to miquella but mohg himself in my mind…. give the guy agency SOMEWHERE

(also in a game that emphasizes the moral dichotomies of almost every single major demigod character— to insist that mohg was only ever Fully Good falls short here too)

[dokidokidraft]

Hanta Sero SFW alphabet!!!

Requested by @kimyoudraft! Sorry it took so long to make them pookie!(I know you wanted normal hcs but I’ve been meaning to try out the fluff alphabet! Let me know if you have anymore characters you want me to do!)

not my template! But user who came up with the idea gave free use, all hcs are mine tho ^_^

A=Activities

What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Sero really likes swimming. He had so much fun at the pool episode, but I think he’s more of a beach guy. Totally likes suntanning, but also loves to splash around with you. He loves reading manga with you, and you guys swap books, seeing who can finish the series first. Massive gossiper as well, you guys could talk about other people for hours.

B=Beauty

What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

He really loves your hands. He’s always holding them, or sometimes gives little hand kisses that make your heart flutter. He also finds your hair super soft and pretty!

C=Comfort

How do they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack, etc.?

He’ll just grab a beanie/hoodie, etc. from his closet and wrap you up in it. He kinda smells like tacos ngl, but it’s comforting nonetheless. He’ll give you hugs from behind while putting his beanie on your head, whispering soft words of encouragement as he holds you tight. Big fan of you stealing his clothes too, so you probably already have one of his shirts on.

D=Dreams

How do they picture their future with their s/o?

He honestly probably doesn’t think about the future. He’s a very ‘go with the flow’ kinda guy and couldn’t care less, but if he had to think about it, his favourite dream would be you guys in a small apartment, near his hero agency. I think he’d like 2 or 3 kids, just to spoil. Pretty basic guy tbh.

E=Equal

Are they the dominant one in the relationship or rather passive?

Like I said, he’s a chill guy. He couldn’t care less. But Sero probably leans more onto the dominant side, considering his personality.

F=Fight

Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

I honestly don’t think he gets into arguments a bunch, and if he does they’re playful. But for the sake of this scenario, he probably doesn’t yell a bunch. Definitely will give you the silent treatment, but is pretty easy to forgive. If you’re in the wrong though, you better assume he isn’t backing down. He’s usually always right unfortunately so if you guys do (somehow) argue he’s serious.

G=Gratitude

How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

Sometimes he forgets just how much you do for him, so he often takes you for granted, but the time when he does recognize your kindness/love he is all over you (but in a chill way). “Awww mi amor, is this all for me?” ( >_<)

H=Honesty

Do they have any secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

He’s a very open person, but he also doesn’t talk about things that he doesn’t find important. If it isn’t of interest to him, he’s not opening up unless asked to. Other than that, no secrets kept from the 2 of you!

I=Inspiration

Did their s/o change them somehow or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

He’s pretty happy with the way he is, but if you don’t like it he’ll try (a tiny bit) to change. With you he has become a lot more observant, learning to read emotions. He also got you into skateboarding. Sero loves to take you on skating dates, happy it’s a hobby you now both share, and one of the many ways he shows he cares.

J=Jealousy

Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Like I have said, he’s very chill. Doesn’t really get jealous easily, but he’s pretty protective. He’ll always be giving little kisses to you so everyone else knows you’re taken. If someone is still doing things to make him jealous though, he’ll stay by your side the whole time, holding your hand and being as lovey-dovey with you as possible around the guy, in hopes he’ll back off.

K=Kiss

Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss with their s/o like?

He is an A M A Z I N G kisser. He likes things slow and intimate, and doesn’t usually rush things. Lots of subtle touches, like foreplay into making out (?). Likes making out with you laying on top of him, lying in his hammock. Gives you little pecks on the top of your head leading up to full-on kisses.

L=Love confession

How do they confess to their s/o?

Definitely something cheesy, but didn’t want to make it too public. Probably a corny note if you guys were already friends before. But he’s def the kind of guy to just find a random girl (his current s/o) pretty, and ask them out immediately.

M=Marriage

Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

He definitely wants to get married eventually, but he’s not the type of guy to be planning it out within the first year of your relationship, he likes to take things slow. Unlike his confession, he’ll want to have the proposal be public (if you’re comfortable with it ofc). Probably one of those stereotypical proposals, with you two on a date at a fancy restaurant. As for after the marriage, he is a pro hero so he doesn’t have a ton of free time, but still tries. He loves coming home to you (or you coming home to him, depending on work schedules), he just likes that first moment when your eyes light up. Your shared apartment is an absolute mess though.

N=Nicknames

What do they call their s/o?

Spanish nicknames <3: Mi amor (My love) , Mi reina (My queen), Princesa (princess). (and a bunch of others that I can’t think of right now ;-;)

O=On cloud nine

What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

It’s pretty obvious, he always has you around and is so affectionate in public. Lots of kisses and hugs. Denki often teases him about it, to which he gets even more displays of affection from you two, just to make Denki uncomfortable. But please, Sero is the type of guy to be absolutely smitten, and it shows.

P=PDA

Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag about their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss, etc. while others are watching?

Like I said, he loves to show you off. Often will make you wear his clothes when you go out, just so he can brag to people. Not a big bragger, but will do it just to piss off the others. Not shy at all either, will literally have a full on make out session with you in the middle of a public place. Overall, tons of PDA

Q=Quirk

Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship

He’s a hopeless romantic. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Sero is absolutely smitten. That means sometimes he’ll follow you around like a lost puppy, and sometimes he’ll make you chase him around, a total tease is what he is. So, rip to your self control because he’s making you do most of the work. If you want a kiss he’ll kiss your cheek, denying you what you really want, just to hear you whine and complain about it later. Biggest tease in the world.

R=Romance

How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

He’s super stereotypical. The big dinner dates, the late night walks in the park, he just gets all his ideas from movies. He’ll never wear a suit though unless it’s necessary, he’ll be in his button up and khakis with his favourite beanie (if you don’t have it on already). As for making you happy, he’ll just always be around you. He’s such a lovesick little bean, and is always fighting for your attention, making you feel loved.

S=Support

Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe them?

He’s honestly just along for the ride. He totally believes in you and supports you, but don’t expect him to be a big cheerleader either. If you want him to be more forward with his support, he will, but he believes that just him being there for you shows a lot (which it does) so overall, not the biggest publicly open supporter, but he loves to help you with your goals and beliefs.

T=Thrill

Do they need to try new things to spice up your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

Sero likes to just do whatever you want, if that means going on a random road trip all the to Tokyo, so be it. Just need to make sure he has enough time. Or that could also mean just lazing around in bed all day, he doesn’t mind. The sense of thrill is nice to him, so he’ll probably suggest something every once in awhile, but other than that it’s completely up to you ^_^)

U=Understanding

How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

He doesn’t really make a point to know everything about you, he lets you choose the pace, or if you even tell him anything at all. He wasn’t very empathetic when you first met, but he’s grown to try to read the room a bit better. Sero isn’t really good at dealing with any mood swings, but he will try to understand where you’re coming from.

V=Value

How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth compared to other things in their life?

Having his priorities straight is not something he would have. He doesn’t like comparing things, and value isn’t an important factor in the relationship in his opinion. But if he had to choose, you probably came before anything else. Second only to maybe his mother (depend how while their mother-son relationship is, idk his backstory).

W=Wildcard

A random fluff headcanon.

Likes tying you to the bed with his tape (not in that way get your mind outta the gutter) and tickling you to death, until your squirming and giggling and begging him to ‘cut it out!’ Eventually he’ll let you go and join you in the fit of giggles, before pulling you closer, trapping you. You won’t be able to leave now. Oh well (ǑwǑ)

X=XOXO

Are they affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddles?

Like I have said many times, he’s a hopeless romantic. Prefers kisses more than hugs though, your lips are the best in his opinion. SUPER affectionate. Like, he always needs to be touching you. Cuddles are 100% his favourite pastime btw, so expect a lot of them

Y=Yearning

How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

He is a clingy boi, but he’s honestly fine without you for the most part. He’ll just do his normal routine, with a slight nagging in the back of his head. He hates when you go away for long missions for work (this is assuming you’re also a pro hero, if that’s not ur plan for it then ignore this part). His hero missions are usually short, he hates being away from home, but yours take forever, he thinks you should relax more. He’s just concerned for you in general, and he obviously misses you whenever you’re away, but he doesn’t necessarily ‘yearn’ for you.

Z=Zeal

Are they willing to go great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

He would do (almost) anything for you, but he’s not as showy about it. Not one of those “you’re my everything” kind of guys, but more of a “you’re okay ig” but he really thinks you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to him. He probably wouldn’t quit his job though, considering how hard he worked for it. Other than that, Sero doesn’t care about other things that much.

and that’s that! I really hope you enjoyed. And I’m sorry this request took me so long to do T-T

[utilitycaster]

@thmtrnfrvns replied to your post “ok so I was wrong about The Emissary and the...”:

didn't matt say that if you popped the bubbles those people turned to dust? Like the bubbles are the only thing preserving them? I might be totally wrong but I keep seeing this question being asked so I'm confused

​He hasn't, and I actually want to cover this. The lore has thus far been noncommittal, both from an out of world perspective (ie, the EGTW, for which this serves as a potential plot hook should people wish to explore it) and in-world (ie, in the canon of Exandria from the main campaigns and other canonical works such as The Nine Eyes of Lucien). We don't know if it's possible; we also very much don't know that it's impossible.

Which is what I want to talk about, because it's weird to me that this idea spread so much within the fandom - that the bubbles are an outright lost cause. I mentioned it before, but the argument the gods should be destroyed (even from behind the Divine Gate) in some sort of retribution for Aeor barely holds up as is; it certainly won't bring back Aeor, and the Divine Gate serves to hold back the gods already so destroying it only in order to kill them is purely an act of vengeance. But it really falls apart if there could be survivors of Aeor.

It's very easy to hold yourself up as the champion for people who cannot speak. They can't contradict you; you can say their motivations and desires are whatever you want. This is something explored in modern political thought, both in the many critiques of the anti-abortion movement (fetuses are fundamentally agency-less things) and in, for example, Dara Horn's People Love Dead Jews. Obviously this is true for any fictional character - none of them can respond to their advocates directly - but especially one who can't even in canon speak on their own behalf. If you say that Ashton would be on Ludinus's side, Ashton might, within the narrative, prove you wrong; but if you say the Aeorians would be, well, who knows. They're dead. Unless they're not. Bringing back anyone from the stasis bubbles fucks over that argument twice: now there are survivors, and those survivors can speak. (Worth noting that the two Aeormatons we've seen in C3 directly have not been in Ludinus's favor, and that his generals at least had no vested interest in sparing the Aeormaton they knew about; this isn't about the people of Aeor or what was lost, it's about pointing at corpses and saying they'd have your back if only they weren't dead.)

This a pattern for the people making arguments in Ludinus's favor. They invoke the titans (dead long before the narrative, and the person who killed the last two of them was Laerryn Coramar-Seelie, whom they don't seem to condemn for it, and they never really talk about what life for the titans must have been. It's not about the titans). They invoke FCG (dead, and they didn't really like them much when they were alive because of, you know, the whole faith in a deity thing, but now that he's dead they can pretend he's a mouthpiece for them. It's not about FCG, or Aeormatons, or Aeor.) They tried invoking the characters who were vaguely critical of the gods in the past but didn't have the lore to back it up and those characters (Keyleth, Essek, Percy) have all sided very clearly with the Accord, so now they stick only to people who can't weigh in and disprove the point. They make up hypotheticals about Bor'Dor and Petrov, the former of which is, again, dead, and the latter of which is a minor NPC with but a slim chance of appearing again whether he lives or dies and both of whom are equally representative of how the Vanguard preys on disaffected young people and chews them up and destroys them while telling them it's for the best, and ignore the many, many living who have been irrevocably harmed by the Vanguard.

It might end up being true that the stasis bubbles are a dead end, and I think it's pretty likely they won't get explored in-game, but if someone says they're absolutely a dead end - especially when Ludinus is going to invoke the fall of Aeor - it's worth exploring why they're saying that. Are they just misinformed (in which case you should still examine their argument, for, you know, not knowing the source material sufficiently well to craft accurate premises from which to argue)? Or would even acknowledging the possibility that they're not a lost cause destroy their argument?

[ae-neon]

I find it incredible how a crack ship like rhysta has more traits in common than the two canon ships f/eysand and n/essian

I think I can understand why fans of those ships like them but I also think sjm's writing is so weak I can't get over how shallow the canon ships end up being.

The potential is there but she always fails to fully develop the individual halves so the whole just ends up looking like 60% [aesthetics + 5 quotes/scenes] and 40% [fanon or lost potential]

I won't talk about Nessian because I cannot stand the fundamental Taming of the Shrew dynamic behind the ship. It was never gonna gonna get me.

So let's talk F.eysand (in a surprisingly more positive light than I thought)

Like I said in another post, Rhysand being the younger sibling would have made F.eysand make so much more sense to me and given me something to root my understanding in.

One of my favourite moments of character clarity is Rhysand telling Feyre it was her defiance reminding him of Cassian that made him fall in love.

That speaks volumes. It tells us about him and his admiration for this downtrodden bastard boy who stole his clothes. It tells us a part of Rhysand feels helpless despite his power so he really appreciates powerless people who overcome that to be brave anyways.

But then it's retconned to him feeling Feyre was his mate even before she set foot in Prythian and I just... Like oh, nvm then, it's just an immaterial magical bond that doesn't care about who each person is that ties them together

And let's say you're a reader who really cares about mates and the bond, then the "like calls to like" nature of Prythians magic also makes rhysta and feyssian logical pairs with their own unique dynamics that would have been interesting to read

Also idk sjm just can't do enemies to lovers in my opinion. One party (the young woman) always feels like a victim whose healing is centred on becoming a suitable partner for the mmc instead of genuinely working through their trauma

I mean Feyre goes from nightmares of UtM to being in that same outfit in the CoN (also under a mountain) and is simultaneously dissociating and but also okay and even empowered?? These things happen at best 3 months apart like ☹️ she's just a kid, it's actually gross

The argument for rhysta here is that Nesta has no UtM trauma, would not have been manipulated into playing sex pet even if she agreed to go to the CoN, would have some leverage because the IC needed her cooperation to reach the queens. It's not a complete dismantling of the set up but it feels less idk icky??

Like had Feyre been given more agency I could accept more, that's why I really think Frost and Starlight should have been a novella about Nesta going to the Continent and the next book in the series should have been Feyre with the Valkyrie plot so she can reestablish herself outside of being Riceball's plus one

I could go into smaller details but I think this is the general view of my issues. Also I don't really like Hades and Persephone, Good Girl Bad Boy vibes so there's that

[guardianspirits13]

Ok now for a list of things that I'm kind of iffy about or wish they had kept from the books. It's worth noting that I can't think of a single show exclusive scene they added that I did not like, and most of the changes were integrated flawlessly.

Starting out, the pacing. I'm hoping this gets better with time, especially given that the second episode has much more time to breathe. The whole first episode felt a little cramped, and some of the exposition felt a bit... exposition-y. I don' t think there is much they could have done to get around this though so I'm not gonna dwell on it.

As a fan of the series, I love how they introduced the structure and function of the PJO world with the intro, but I think the jump from "Percy sees things" to "everything is all real" felt a bit abrupt. I am curious what first time fans think about this, and again the first episode covers a lot more ground page-wise than ep 2.

Manchild Gabe... I am not sure how I feel about this. In the books he seemed downright threatening and even with Percy's 12yo bravado, he was still an intimidating figure. His bickering with Sally seemed more like your typical dysfunctional relationship than a power imbalance... both can be harmful in their own way, but I'm still undecided on how much giving Sally a bit more agency in her relationship with him effects the larger story. The whole "not all monsters look like monsters" thing works well in the books with Gabe, but I guess they were redirecting it to foreshadow Luke's betrayal? I'm not sure.

...which brings me to Sally. I was unsure about the casting, but she has earned her stay to me. I always imagined her as a bit more subdued, especially with the more intense iterations of Gabe. She's kind and gentle and has a rebellious streak, but as worried as she might be for Percy she hides it inside of herself. I think her being a bit more expressive as a character works in this setting though, especially since we aren't seeing her through Percy's kid colored lenses. She feels a bit less like the perfect, kind, and understanding mother Percy sees, and a bit more like a real-life single mother trying to keep some of that childhood wonder alive despite everything. She does seem younger than I would have expected, but that's a nitpick on my end. I think she is one character that I will always have a separate book/show counterpart for in my mind.

Ok. Now for Clarisse. Out of all the characters I was skeptic about, I think she's the only one who didn't win me over. This is a writing issue, nothing at all to do with the actress. She was characterized more as a 'queen bee' type mean girl than a bully who picks fights just to feel worthy of her father's approval. She would be better fit for a vindictive daughter of Aphrodite than a daughter of Ares. My mind might be changed in the future but we got most of her scenes in these first two episodes so I'm doubtful. The one moment that had potential was when Percy broke her spear, but the Clarisse I know would not back off just because there is an audience.

There was no hellhound... I was kinda looking forward to it, and it does emphasize that even camp isn't really safe for Percy and is a catalyst for both his quest and the idea that there is a traitor. I can kind of see why the cut it for thematic purposes so Percy feels safe for once in his life, but that's only if I squint.

The scene cuts. I know, I know they're supposed to mimic book chapters. I get it. But it just doesn't work for me, it feels like there's a lack of establishing shots and the black screen is long enough you think the tv is buffering. It's an interesting idea in concept, but the execution falls flat.

OH also as far as things that were missing- the 3 fates. I know this is in the show since it was in the trailers, but I'm curious as to where they're gonna put it now.

Anyways minor nitpicks aside these two episodes were an emotional roller coaster and absolute masterpieces of television cinema.

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

This person genuinely thinks that Aang would be a better character if he kidnapped a baby?? Or would be more interesting?? Honey, why would he do that. That's not him being boring, that's just him not committing an actual, terrible, crime. Alos it's his show, it's literally called 'Avatar the Last Airbender' of course he's going to get more episodes focusing on him, it's his show???

"Aang being a main character limits him to being a role model'' by brother in Christ, this a Nickelodeon show. Even Zuko is a bit of role model, in the sense of him being a way to teach kids "Just 'cause you're hurting doesn't mean it's okay to be a dick to others. Please apologize if you ever hurt someone."

Also Aang DOES make morally questionable, and downright incorrect, choices that the narrative address. Fleeing when the other airbenders want to send him away, hiding the map to Hakoda from Sokka and Katara, trying to learn firebending before he's ready and then vowing to NEVER use that bending again, trying to trigger the Avatar state, wanting revenge on the sandbenders, shutting off emotionally to not deal with his pain over losing Appa, refusing AND accepting to ignore his love for Katara to fully master the Avatar state, his innitial refusal to continue pretending he is dead to hide from his enemies, the Ember Island kiss, and even his refusal to kill Ozai (before the actual Deus Ex Machina happens).

Aang is challenged all the time. He grows all the time. He is allowed to be wrong all the time. Yall are just mad he was the protagonist instead of your favorite.

And while I agree Sokka didn't have much of an arc, I disagree about Toph never growing even if there were some issues with her storyline. She went from someone who was terrified of accepting help from others as that had always meant "lose all agency" her whole life, to someone that consistently relies on her friends. She went from uncooperative because "she carries her own weight" to being a team player that even offers her friends emotional support. She even makes the first step to reconciliate with her parents.

LOTS of characters had arcs (Iroh, Jet, Mai, Azula, and even King Kuei- that's how stories work. The reason some of these were handled better/given more or less screentime is because Bryke insisted on having only three seasons, even though the show clearly needed a fourth. It had nothing to do with "the problem of having a protagonist" - that's not a problem if you're a competent writer with enough time.

Also, if you see Katara in the FIRST DAMN EPISODE talking about how much she wants to learn waterbending AND how grateful she was to be allowed to be a kid again, yet you're suprised to see her become such a badass whose happy ending is helping end the war and thus be allowed to be a kid again because "she's just Aang's love interest", that says a lot more about YOU than about the show.

Avatar's writting has problems, yes, because no work of fiction is perfect because no writer is perfect. But the overwhelming majority of complaints from some fans come not from acknowledging those flaws, but from a complete inability to understand some REALLY basic storytelling stuff that the show handled with excellence.

That's what happens when you're too focused on what you want to see to actually look at the story playing out in front of you: you miss incredibly obvious things that the writers made as easy to follow as possible since the show is aimed at 7-year-olds.

[misrepresentedmorallygrey]

PROPAGANDA

Dimitri Alexendre Blaiddyd

PLEASE NOTE: THE MOD OF THIS TOURNAMENT HATES THIS PROPAGANDA! THEY BELIEVE THAT IT'S ACTIVELY LYING ABOUT THE CHARACTER AND COMING FROM A PLACE OF HATE FOR SAID CHARACTER INSTEAD OF THE FANDOM CULTURE SURROUNDING HIM. You have been warned

Why is this man so woobified. The literal whole point of him is that he's meant to be a bait and switch for the typical perfect fire emblem lord hero. He's a sadistic killer without a hint of mercy for a huge part of the story, he works with the dictator church without considering whether or not there's something wrong with it, and his route ends in him being just as much of an imperialist as the others (taking over the whole continent and being crowned its ruler), just by a different name. He's SO interesting and SO conflicted and yet it feels like 99% of the fandom can't look past "uwu emo sad boy :((( so damaged :((((" and completely disregards that he's just as brutal as the other main characters from any other route's perspective, that's the whole point of the game!

Yuno Kashiki

Yuno Kashiki is an 18 year old rental girlfriend and sexworker in Japan. She was incarcerated in Milgram for murder at the start of the series in 2020. Since then she has been repeatedly dehumanized by the fandom. Having her agency and statements on her own life overwhelmingly ignored in order to give her a sob story she has consistently rebuked at every turn. Stating from the beginning even if she had to beg for forgiveness like her life depended on it she would. However, it's simply been handed to her as the audience continually goes she was too young and stupid to actually be held accountable for her actions. The same audience that later tries to vote a 12 year old child abuse victim guilty because she has to learn her lesson and she knew what she was doing. Yes the fandom interprets the eighteen year old who chose to work in the profession they did simply because they wanted to something they have no qualms admitting as having less agency than the twelve year old. They treat her like a stupid baby who's only error was not knowing how a condom worked as a sexworker. They say her only crime is an abortion despite her overtly getting upset at other individuals alluded to be clients throughout her songs. Having the literal lyrics of her second song go, ""Poor naive little girl"? So off the mark, what's it to you? It's absurd. Like really who do you think you are? Don't weigh me meassure me against your morality. Just shut it, will you? You know it all." And "Carrssing me with your "good girl". Who needs your self-righteous pardon?" They're so committed to the abortion equating to the murder she's in here for idea that fans got mad at the writer for even writing it that way when at least several other very not fetuses are alluded to throughout her songs and at points literally shown. Her first song even highlighting her clients belongings throughout it with inverted coloring. But instead of thinking she may have just killed a client who was bothering her they've convinced themselves that she's just a silly little outlier who's not meant to be here because abortion isn't murder her body her choice which fair if it wasn't for the fact the only people putting it on the table to compare to murder is the audience themselves. Despite everyone else in here very literally killing actual people with lives, professions, etc as they frame her case as a feminism issue and say if you vote her guilty you just hate women or are anti-abortion. In response to the framing of her situation as she can hear the audiences thoughts on her she's only gotten more depressed and closed off as tge series has progressed blatantly stating to hurry all this up so she can go home. Because it doesn't matter what she says about her situation the audience and the guard by proxy will just end up creating whatever story they want about her so it doesn't matter she's over it. Which in all honesty fucking fair- Wouldn't anyone be after getting treated like that for going on four years.

She's far more morally grey than folks want to admit. She's not evil, not by a long shot, but she's not exactly innocent either. She's innocent of her (perceived) crime in her media, but in terms of her attitude and outlook on life, I feel people downplay her incredibly grey actions. She uses / used compensated dating as a way to feel "warm" without forming emotional attachments. She hasn't killed anyone, nor has she manipulated anyone into killing for her, but that's why she's a good representative of a more everyday morally grey person. Her actions aren't outlandish or extreme, and if anything she can fade into the background with relative ease, yet I still firmly believe she's morally grey. tldr; Yuno has far more depth than the (general) fandom sees her as having. She gets misrepresented and her voice as a character is often unheard.

[shootingstarpilot]

2, 5, 20 for the ask game🥰🥰🥰

Eyyyy thank you anon!!

2. What character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

Honestly? Jango Fett, and the Mandalorians as a whole.

I didn't have much of an opinion of Jango when I started, except admiring how neatly Mace decapitated him. I don't have much exposure to Legends, either, so I was relying almost entirely on Lucas's canon. Now, though- with Jango Fett being portrayed as a wonderful father and this warring culture being held up as the one that takes in all the poor :( orphaned :( children (hey who made those orphans I wonder), this one that puts such a good and pure emphasis on family- and always being held up as superior to the Jedi- I simply cannot stand them.

I tend to steer clear of fics that have Jango and/or put a lot of emphasis on how amazing Mandalorian culture is. No thank you. I'm a cripple. I have no patience for fetishizing a culture where your worth is entirely determined by how well you can fight.

5. Worst blorboficiation?

Anakin fucking Skywalker.

He's a fascinating character! Absolutely he is! But, notably, he also slaughtered thousands of innocent sentients, was entirely responsible for one massacre and played a key role in another genocide- (I think Palps would've unleashed Order 66 with or without Anakin by his side, but that doesn't change the fact that Anakin willingly helped him.) Reducing him to a wee babe who was stripped of all agency and was merely buffeted by the winds of fate - simply tripping into committing genocide - makes him so much less interesting. Let him have agency! Let him be a horrible murderous bastard! That makes the bits where he's not hit all the harder!

20. Could anyone have fixed Anakin?

No.

Other people have put it much better than I have- @gffa, @antianakin, and @david-talks-sw all come to mind- but... yeah. Not even Ahsoka, regardless of how much Certain People might like to think she could have. But only Anakin could've fixed Anakin- other people could've helped along the way, but he would have needed to choose that path for himself, and he... didn't.

It was there for him. But he chose not to. And that makes his story all the more tragic- that he had every opportunity to choose differently, and instead fucked himself over, again and again and again.

The Choose Violence ask game

[positivelyamazonian]

I saw a post earlier saying how Kurtis was and is still cringe. Saying he was hated a lot back then. I only got into the game in 2007 so I'm not sure about his reception when the game first came out. I think it's unfair because there is so much cut-content from the game that we could have had regarding his backstory and he's actually very interesting imo.

Probably most of those who thought and said that in the past were the typical gamer and incel dudebros who felt threatened for a male character that showed agency and moved around as Lara's equal, but much more to the fact that Lara was obviously interested in him. He kinda ruined his wanking fantasies, and as you can see I don't even care to speak with these terms at this point. If people is repeating still this discourse, is because these kind of crowds and discourses regenerate and spawn like a plague again.

I had no Internet back then and I only entered into contact with TR fandom shortly after I finished TRAOD. Even if at the beginning I felt a bit of rejection towards him, by the end of the game I was already invested in him and shipping him with Lara because of Lara's reactions towards him. Then it was when I saw a lot of people expressing this alleged hate against Kurtis both in fan forums but also in videogame press... and ironically they used to coincide in this mindset - they felt furious at a male character having the chance to get Lara. We didn't use the word incel or dudebro back then but they existed already.

So even if Kurtis had the chance of coming out as a well-fleshed, fully content backed and whole backstory they would have hated him anyway. It's a matter of feeling threatened or bothered by the hot guy that has very solid chances to get the girl you kinda consider yours, just because you selected the game to enjoy a good pair of tits in the first place.

And I honestly couldn't care less about these people. I have fought them in the past, but it's to no avail and I'm too old for that shit. They don't have qualms to diminish shippers and content creating female fans for their preferences and actions and they don't mind in the slightest to brush them off as if they were bitches in heat - I've seen it in the past and I still see it -; ironically, the ones being in heat in the first place were none other than them, only towards Lara instead.

This is the place where I solidly believe most of Kurtis' hate comes from. Later it was people who preferred to ship Lara with other characters - male and female - and used the narrative of Kurtis being an abuser - per that famous Louvre scene - to disqualify him as character and accuse the shippers of supporting rape discourse. I've suffered that too. And when not, it's other fans thinking they are holier than shippers because they don't ship, and avoid discussing Kurtis and his potential relationship with Lara like one avoids the plague. This still happens.

In the end I strongly believe Kurtis never got that much hate, it's more what has been said than what actually was. If people had solid complaints about him, at most could've been for his difficult controls and the insufferable boss fight he had to endure against Boaz. Now these are reasons I can respect. You mentioned, very appropriately, his underdevelopment as character. But this is only another layer of TRAOD's doomed release as an incomplete product.

As you well said, he had such great potential and when you make your research and start putting his scattered pieces together, he is more complex and compelling that simply being Lara's love interest. And I wanted so much to see that, but alas, we'll never get it. It's late for that, but not for a bit of respect among fandom, even if as improbable.

[vimara00]

How a relationship with Shoto Todoroki would develop by Vi ✨

Hi everyone, It's Vi! ✨ Today I was thinking about how would a relationship with Shoto be like so I wrote this. Hope u enjoy! ☺️ (Again, I'm sorry if there are any grammatical mistakes, english is not my first language 🙏🏻)

Warnings: none, just fluff

All character reservations to Horikoshi

Strangers to friends

• When you both entered the U.A, Shoto wasn't interested in making friends as his mission was to supperpass Endeavour. He didn't have time for things as trivial as establishing relationships and he made it known to everyone around him. However, everything changed when he scored a low grade at the spanish exam. He actually thought he could manage that class easily without help but it didn't seem like it and that really damage his self-esteem. Aizawa already knew Shoto would've a negative reaction so he suggested to asked his classmates for help and let's just say, the idea didn't thrilled him. Everybody was asking Yaoyoruzu, Bakugou or Deku for help but he was too proud to asked them. He would figured out something by himself.

• Shoto spent the whole week reading Spanish books but he just couldn't grasped the concept. Also, his irritation grew more as his classmates were progressing faster that him (thanks to the tutoring lessons they were given)

One afternoon in particular, Shoto was in the library working on some exercises when one girl from his class appeared. She grabbed a book and sat down near him. As much as he would like to say he couldn't care less about her, he definitely knew who she was. Her name was y/n, she had an air manipulation quirk and a very distracting face. And by "distracting", he meant "the prettiest face he's ever seen" and what bother him so much it's that, more often than not, he would give quick glaces her way during class and completely forget what he was doing.

Shoto has never been able to make friends as his father always put training above more mundane things so he had cero social skills. So this "attraction" he felt towards her was also something he had never experienced before and even he wanted to get closer to her, he just didn't know how so instead, he did his best to ignore her. However, it was kind of difficult as she definitely was the nicest person he's ever meet.

• y/n saw he was struggling with some spanish exercises and offered to help as it was her first language so it was easy for her and eventhough he declined her offer many times, she helped him anyway. It was actually the best decision she could ever make as not only he got on of the highest scores in class but also, Shoto finally let her get closer to him even if he still had this "unapproachable actitud". And that's how their friendship started and honestly, everybody was shocked that the 1A's rain of sunshine was friends with Todoroki.

• At first it was only saying hi to each other, sitting together at lunch and training together. However, over time, Shoto warmed up to her (and also to others) so they hung out at y/n's bedroom where they watched movies and also had this tradition where they would go to different restaurants or cafe every month.

• After the Sports festival, Endeavour offered y/n to do a internship at his agency along with his son but, for Shoto's relief, she said no as she went to pro hero Hawks agency. Eventhough he would've liked to spent more time with her, he wanted to keep his father away from y/n and her quirk. He felt the need to protected her but little did he know that wasn't just him being connected with but something else; something more deeper and he was about to find out...

Friends to lovers

• Fuyumi invited Shoto's friends, Izuku and Bakugou, to have dinner at their house but Endeavour and her were not expecting someone else to appeared after they all were at the table. Shoto had sent a last minute message to invite y/n but didn't want to tell his sister beforehand as she would've pushed the topic and, honestly, he wasn't ready to rationalized those feelings. Because lately, he's been feeling this kind of excitement every time he caught a glimpse of her, smiling a lot more when she was around and his breath was taken away when she would put her head on his shoulder or held his hand. He could be dense sometimes but he wasn't an idiot, deep down he knew this meant something else but was too coward to act on it. Everybody was shocked to see the young lady as Shoto was someone who kept his private life for himself. Izuku, Bakugou, y/n and him survived the tense situation and where about to head home but not before Fuyumi did an interrogation to Shoto about this new friend of his. Her sixth sense told her little brother was in fact, in love with the e/c girl. It was just too obvious! his sister noticed how his normally "irritated face" (because of Endeavour) light up when y/n arrived or how he was always attentive and paying attention to what she did or what she was saying. Also, when she asked y/n if she was Shoto's girlfriend he did not denied but blushed instead. So she really hoped his brother could be happy with her and treat her right

(Of course Fuyumi gave y/n her number for exchanging recipes and update her about his little brother)

•One particularly day, during training, Izuku and y/n were sparing together, something very unusual as she always trained with Todoroki. At first, he thought that maybe she just wanted to try fighting with other quirks (eventhough theirs work perfectly together) so he kept going with his day as usual. However, when she sat next to Midoriya at lunch and were having a very animated conversation, he started to feel a bit irritated but didn't say anything. That night, he had been so busy that he ended up showering really late. As he was walking to his room, he saw y/n coming out of Midoriya's bedroom and when she realised he just caught her, her eyes widened and she nervously said goodbye to him and left in a hurry. Oh, Shoto saw red! If it wasn't for the fact that Deku had closed his door quickly, he would definitely be freezed by now. He didn't like this feeling of pure range but he couldn't help it. Since when they got along so well? What was so fascinating about Midoriya that everybody fell to his feets? Gosh he prayed she didn't like his friend like that cause he didn't know what he would do. All this interaction lighted up an alarmed that remainded him that she won't wait forever, that he needed to confess before he lost her to someone else

• Shoto couldn't sleep that night, planning his confession and imagining possible scenarios and reactions to it. He didn't know if she felt something more than a friendship and honestly, he was scared shirtless cause he didn't want to lose their great friendship, he wouldn't known what to do with himself if y/n rejected him. He couldn't go back to how his life was before her appeared in it and made it worth living beyond a revenge. And, eventhough he was terrified of her response, it was better than to keep those feelings bottled. So the next morning he left a letter on her desk saying he needed to talked to her and that they should met at the school's terrace.

• Once she stood in front of him, he didn't let her ask any questions and just went straight to the point (as he always did) "Look y/n, the reason I called you here today was because something's been bothering me for a while. You and my feelings for you. Since we first spoke, I thought you were too good to be actually true and when you became my friend, I felt blessed to have someone I can trust and who doesn't judge me. Someone who taught me that it's ok to cry sometimes and that my feelings are valuable. I even started to opened up more to others. And all thanks to you! I'm not gonna lie, when I saw you with Midoriya yesterday, my heart hurt cause the thought of being so close to you yet losing you, was just too much. I know I'm being selfish. You deserve someone who has no trouble expressing their emotions or someone who isn't carrying childhood scars that haven't healed yet (emotionally speaking) Maybe you should be with someone as nice as Midoriya" he paused and continued "but what I'm trying to say is that, if you ever feel anything for me that makes you appreciate the good things above all the bad things I have, I swear to love you with my heart and soul. Take it both of them, it's full of you. Take all of me y/n, I'm already yours anyway... It's ok if you don't reciprocate, I mean you don't -" And Shoto was definitely not expecting for her to kiss him but he won't complain. The kiss was a bit clownsly as they were inexperienced but it was beautiful because they loved each other and they would've time to learn. From that day, Shoto kept his promise to loved her and protect her and he felt in love with her every day all over again.

[elina-sakura]

Top Ten Favorite MDA Characters

Note: I am referring to both canon and fanon elements, and the ranking is not because of negative emotions but my feelings and preferences.

Major Spoilers for the entire game by the way

1. Yuma Kokohead

Of course, I love the little amnesiac ‘trainee’ full of anxiety. I just love anxious characters who have to struggle being the hero of the story in such dangerous situations. He just makes the perfect candidate for hurt/comfort stories. I love the relationships he has with the Nocturnal Detective Agency, I love how he wants to help everyone (even if he doesn’t have the best tact), and I love his angsty moments in his head (I love me some good angst). And when we learn of his true identity in the end, it really shines a light on his character more both outside and in-game. All of his flaws and the impacts to the story he made and the struggles he had. But most importantly the connections he made with others, the core part of the entire game and his character, is what makes me love him so much.

2. Yakou Furio

I don’t know why I’m so hyperfixated on this character. Maybe it’s because he’s the mentor character of the protagonist, and ended up giving me father-figure vibes to me with Yuma. Despite his flaws, he is such a good character who has been through so much, yet cares deeply for the people he loves and the city itself. And protect the detectives he took in, even with how much trouble they cause. But Chapter 4 and post-game is where I really start to appreciate him with his backstory revealed and how far he’s willing to go for the ones he love. Here’s to hoping he returns in post-game contents or hopefully sequels.

(NOTE: This is purely my preferences. I do not want to cause discourse or make people feel bad who ship Yuma and Yakou romantically; you guys do you with Yumakou and I’ll be happy with Yakou Fathero).

3. Makoto Kagutsuchi

Okay, this is where we really get to spoilers here since it happened post-game, but he became my favorite character right to the top three just because of who he is. An enigma who holds the secret of Kanai Ward, who created the mysteries in his hands, yet his motivations and heart was only filled with good intentions (despite having to make human meat buns). A young man who had to hold the secret for so long all on his own, try to fix many problems that weren’t actually his fault, finding purpose and his own identity outside of his original, and his relationship with Yuma as a whole. Complex, morally grey characters always catches my interests, especially when they are the antagonists.

4. Desuhiko Thunderbolt

I know, shocking. My favorite out of the four Master Detectives in the NDA is the perverted Superstar Detective, but when you look past the trope (and Chapter 2 and that one DLC scene as a whole) you would see there is a lot of depth to his character. He’s kind of the only one (confirmed so far) who had a pretty normal childhood and actually has relatable struggles a lot of people can probably relate to (being a shy and possibly bullied kid who wants to be a better version of themselves), who desires to be a Superstar and a detective at the same time and doesn’t want to be just one or the other, and is an all-around cool guy and loyal friend who could get along with people when he isn’t being a creep or overly obnoxious. It’s just too bad the writers seem to think the pervert trope would be a good way to add comedy when his obnoxious and goofball nature would probably be enough to get some comedy out of him. I want to hope maybe the writers would make Desuhiko less of a pervert in the future, but I’m not gonna get my hopes up. I just hope people can possibly see through the trope to see the real Superstar under the gross exterior (metaphorically-wise).

5. Kurumi Wendy

I’m honestly surprise she’s high on the list, but with how much I try to expand her character and how much fics I want to do with her, I’d say she definitely made it to the top five of the list. Kurumi is someone where I see a lot of potential in her character, but the writers ended up underutilizing her. She’s a high school informant who lost her grandfather to the overarching mystery, and her best friend a few months ago, and finds a special connection with Yuma and become one of his supporting partners alongside Shinigami. There’s a lot of potentials with her character, like seeing how the losses of important people in her life affected her, how she lives as a high school informant, and see her feelings on detectives and her relationship with Yuma, the new friend she feels a connection with and someone who gives her hope. But unfortunately, the writers end up making a bigger focus on making her the love interest of Yuma, and outside of that, make her an exposition dump. Heck, even in Chapter 5, I’m pretty sure Makoto only brought her with Yuma so she could tell him the informations needed to solve Kanai Ward’s Ultimate Secret, and discover that she and everyone else are Homunculi. It’s honestly sad because there’s so much to her character that could have made her stand out on her own, and I wish was utilized more.

6. Fubuki Clockford

Fubuki is such an adorable character and kind of relatable to me in being an airhead (though not to the extremes as she is). She’s kind and friendly to her peers, and is very imaginative as well when it comes to what she hears, like believing the sky is the ocean (if you look at it from an art perspective, it would be pretty cool). And especially her inner struggles on how she recognizes how slow-witted she is and how her time power leads her distraught when she’s not able to prevent the terrible outcomes she witnesses. Chapter 3 really shined a spotlight on her character, and one of the few spots that makes Chapter 3 worthwhile.

7. Halara Nightmare

Now this is a character I feel I have a lot in common with, specifically in real life. I tend to be rude and asocial (though only if I’m tired and overworked). I don’t like to be physically touched at all unless I give permission and told a head of times. I prefer to work alone when it comes to my work (in this case, my schoolwork). And I am definitely, sadly allergic to cats, especially since I feel connected with cats in personality at times. So I can relate to Halara in some aspects even though I sometimes am off-put by how harsh they are with Yuma in Chapter 1. I understand it’s because they want Yuma to figure things out for himself since he needs to quickly relearn things as a Detective and get to work on solving Kanai Ward’s Ultimate Secret (if anything, I commend them for putting in the effort to give some teaching to Yuma in some ways), and in hindsight they were working as an assistant to Yuma so they must have felt they shouldn’t have to do the job for Yuma (which I can’t blame). But sometimes they get a little too harsh and I just feel bad for Yuma.

8. Vivia Twilight

He is definitely an enigma of his own that interests me (though probably not as much as everyone else). A character who’s of his own agency and his own agendas and interests, and I love that kind of morally grey characters. Especially in Chapter 4 and the DLC where we got to know him more. And I enjoyed how he was a rival to Yuma for Chapter 4 who challenged the beliefs in discovering the truth, and that he was the only one who truly knew about Yuma and Shinigami. I honestly wish there were more interactions between the two after that. It really would have feel like their relationship would have been so unique and deep and interesting. And his relationship with Yakou really felt special after the DLC revealed their backstory together.

9. Shinigami

It’s usually kind of rare for me to like and be interested in mascot characters. And Shinigami surprisingly wins me over. At first, she definitely annoyed me with how she doesn’t exactly empathize with Yuma’s predicament sometimes and her callous nature with murderers sometimes (specifically in Chapter 2), but I can also understand that that’s her major flaw: lack of empathy. She’s a Death God whose natural job is to reap souls and uphold the concept of death. So of course, she’s not gonna understand whenever someone is stressed or feels empathy even with criminals. But that’s what make her character arc that leads to Chapter 4 all the more special. The previous murderers she reaped were those she barely got to know of, Yuma included, so it’s understandable to have a detachment with them, but the chapter 4 culprit was someone both she and Yuma knew, someone that really does make her understand his breakdown.

10. Pucci Lavmin

Pucci was one of my favorite Master Detectives I was looking forward to getting know. She’s a young woman (who may be close to Yuma’s age) who loves cute stuff like teddy bears, has sensitive hearing and gets snappy when too many people talk, and has a resting b!tch face. Seriously, I connect with her so much in these elements, and even thought she was going to be the female deuteragonist that we’ve seen/gotten from Danganronpa. So I was crushed when I learned she died and it was real and not a tutorial trick or something. It’s why she’s on the bottom of the list. She didn’t have as much screen time and development with her. Yes, including Kurumi, the real deuteragonist, who even though was underutilized at least had the groundwork for what kind of developments she could have had.