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jalapeno-princess · 4 years ago

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According To Him

CEO Mark X Reader

Genre: THE FLUFFIEST OF FLUFF I HAVE EVER WRITTEN (with some mentions of sex) (God how do I write about things I have never and probably will never experience I am so sad)

Word Count: 6.5K

Summary: Being in such a high position at one of the biggest tech companies in the country on top of attending college full time can be a lot to handle. You’ve never thought highly of yourself and there were days that you felt like giving up because the workload was too hard. You also were extremely insecure over every single thing about yourself. However, there is one person who makes you feel like the most beautiful, hard working and deserving person in the entire world--the CEO of the company you work at and the man of your dreams, Mark Tuan.

A/N: (GUESS WHOSE BACK, BACK AGAIN IN LESS THAN A WEEK) IT’S ME WITH ANOTHER STORY but this time it’s adorable, endearing, full of love and laughter and everything I wish was going on in my life but no, I’m seconds away from a mental breakdown every single day. This is based off of Ariana Grande’s new song “POV” and honestly as soon as i heard the song I knew I had to write an imagine based on it it’s sooooo good I wish someone made me feel that way dude why can’t I have a boyfriend like Mark in this story (Or just Mark in general) Please enjoy! (And cry with me)

It's like you got superpowers Turn my minutes into hours You got more than 20/20, babe Made of glass, the way you see through me You know me better than I do Can't seem to keep nothin' from you How you touch my soul from the outside Permeate my ego and my pride

I wanna love me (ooh) The way that you love me (ooh) Ooh, for all of my pretty and all of my ugly too I'd love to see me from your point of view I wanna trust me (trust me) The way that you trust me (trust me) Oh, 'cause nobody ever loved me like you do I'd love to see me from your point of view

“If we want to build stronger relationships with our hundreds of clients in order to get them to prolong their contracts with us, I suggest that we increase the amount of stocks that we invest in to each of their companies and find more sponsors to help get the attention of the public—maybe we could start putting ads on television or on the radio?”

If there was anything you hated about your job, it was public speaking. For someone who graduated with her master’s degree in communications with double minors in criminal justice and journalism, one would think you were great when having to speak to a large group of people—but no. Your entire body along with your voice was shaking profusely and you felt as if you were about to throw up. If it wasn’t for the devastatingly handsome man whose been sneaking cheeky winks and a few grins in your direction here and there in order to calm your racing heart, then you would have blew the entire thing.

“I think that’s a wonderful idea y/n. A lot of people listen to the radio nowadays and television can get the attention of those who don’t drive or use cars as transportation. What does everyone else think?”

If Mark wasn’t there, you were sure your heart would have jumped out of your chest. He actually wasn’t supposed to be there; he had a couple of meetings he had scheduled months beforehand, but when he found out that the members of the board were having a meeting and you were expected to be involved in it while presenting your ideas on how the company you were currently working for could expand throughout the United States and maybe even outside of the country, he cancelled every single meeting with the intention of giving you moral support.

No matter how much you tried to reject his offer, not wanting to get in the way of his other responsibilities—you’d be lying if you said you weren’t extremely happy that he was there. His presence was undoubtedly calming; no matter wherever the two of you were, whether it was a board meeting, a company dinner or more relaxing and romantic places like the beach or on vacation in Europe, Mark could always bring you serenity.

You looked around hesitantly in attempts to prevent Mark from seeing the blush he caused rise upon your cheeks from gazing at you and because you were genuinely curious about what your colleagues had to say about your brainstorm. When you saw a hand raise—particularly by a specific someone you weren’t all too fond of in your workplace, you wanted to let out a disgusted groan, but you refused to stoop to her level nor did you want any of your coworkers thinking you were rude.

“Don’t get me wrong, that is a decent idea—but I know there are other things we can do that would better benefit the company without having to waste money on unnecessary ad sales. With all due respect sir, I don’t think it’s fair for you to show favoritism towards y/n just because she’s your girlfriend.”

If you weren’t surrounded by fifteen other people, you were sure you would have leaped across of the table and socked her in the face. There were at least 1,000 people employed at the company you were working at and although you haven’t met every single person, you genuinely liked all the employees you did get the chance to get introduced to. However, there was only one person in particular that you honestly could do without and she just so happened to feel the need to speak up against you because she loved making you look stupid—especially in front of Mark.

From the day you met her, Megan never seemed to care about you even if you were nothing but nice and friendly to her. You didn’t care though—you were there to work, not to worry about someone who dislikes you. But you didn’t do anything wrong for her to treat you as if you were scum of the earth. Every time you would walk past her desk, she would glare at you and during meetings like these that unfortunately she had to attend, she would always plot against you.

You overheard a conversation between two colleagues in the bathroom one day about how Megan felt as though Mark might have taken a liking to her and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes. Your boyfriend had no clue about the way she treated you so rudely; you didn’t like starting unnecessary drama, but you were sure he caught on to her hostility—she wasn’t very vague about it.

As the days went on though, you only grew more and more irritated with her and it was getting harder for you to bite back your tongue and prevent yourself from saying how you truly felt about her. It didn’t matter that your boyfriend just so happened to be the CEO of the tech company you’ve been working at for almost three years now; if you were to physically attack someone or instigate a fist fight, there was nothing he could do if she were to press charges—well other than bail you out—but that wouldn’t look too good for him as one of the youngest and most successful CEOs in the country.

Your boyfriend Mark just so happened to take over his father’s company right after the elder man decided to retire just a year after you began working there. You were an intern at the company for a couple of months before Mark’s dad offered you a permanent job; stating that you were one of the best interns he’s ever had—that you were extremely responsible, hard working, dedicated to your craft, passionate about your education and just an all around kind of person.

The Tuan family’s company was a very fast paced working environment. Nine hours would pass by faster than you could even comprehend only because you were constantly doing something. You’d be lying if you said your life didn’t get stressful every now and then—managing both college and a full-time job wasn’t the easiest thing to do; especially since you were a double major. But you did your best to stay on top of school and work. You were introduced to Mark one day by his father when he told you that he wanted the two of you to work together in order to build a healthy work relationship seeing as how he wanted you to be his son’s go to person.

Mr.Tuan trusted you the most out of every single person working at his company; so it was only natural for him to want you to show his son the same support that you’ve shown him.

Mark was nothing short of a gentleman when you first met him—he never used his position or the fact that he was the heir to the company to get what he wanted or to intimidate anyone of the employees in anyway. In fact, sometimes you’d forget that his family owned the company and that he was supposed to take over his dad’s position seeing as how he blended in so well with everyone else. He allowed you to show him the ropes; even if his father was the CEO and this company has been in his family for over four generations, he himself has never really been involved in what went on at the company.

His parents wanted him to enjoy his life and do whatever it was that he wanted to do before having him take on such an important and tiresome role. Mark was such an amazing listener and he seemed to be very eager to learn. He complimented you on how dedicated and how hard working you were and he was very grateful that his dad had someone working for him who cared for the success of their company as much as he did.

There was a point where you spent almost every minute that you were at work with Mark and you honestly weren’t complaining. You loved his presence and enjoyed how happy he made you. Although he wasn’t a man of many words, his actions spoke for him. He’d open every single door for you, pulled out your chairs, carried the things you would need for meetings, held your bag as you paid for coffee—hell, he even started to take over every bill that you had whether it was for food, drinks or just your necessities.

At first, you assumed that he was only being nice as a way to no verbally thank you for helping him out—but with the way he would look at you with a certain glint and sparkle in his eyes, and the way he would try and touch you every now and then, whether it was bringing back some of your hair behind your ear, pulling you on the inside as the two of you walked on the sidewalk or playfully poking your cheek if he noticed you falling asleep from how exhausted you were, people didn’t do that to just anybody.

It was obvious he felt comfortable around you and you knew it was a stretch to feel this way, but you were secretly hoping that he saw you as more than just a colleague. You knew you were screwed from the moment he was assigned to work under you—Mark had to be the handsomest man you’ve ever seen in your entire life. He had the most well-defined features; the prettiest brown eyes, a sharp and pointy nose, prominent cheek bones and the softest, heart shaped lips.

You’d find yourself staring at his lips during meetings or when the two of you would get lunch together and you always wondered what it would be like to feel them against yours. Only after a month, your partnership with Mark grew more flirtatious. He would always playfully tease you and make jokes in attempts to make you laugh when he could tell you were stressed; he also complemented you every single day about how beautiful he thought you were and how your laugh had to be the prettiest and most contagious sound in the world. You’d observe the way he would act around the other employees to see if the way he interacted with you was just him being friendly—but he hardly ever talked to anyone else unless he had to for business purposes.

It made you feel special in a sense that maybe—just maybe Mark had developed some kind of romantic feelings for you as you quickly did with him. One night, Mark took you out to dinner as a way to thank you for all you’ve done for him so far and the night went along perfectly. Conversation flowed so easily between the two of you and you found out that you had so much in common with the older boy. Your sense of humors were the exact same and you both were very generous when it came to helping out the less fortunate.

You didn’t think much of him offering to drop you home, you just assumed he wanted to make sure you made it in to your apartment safely. Once the two of you pulled up to your complex, he insisted on walking you to your door. You didn’t really expect anything once you were to reach the front door—you planned on thanking him for such an amazing night and for taking you home.

To your surprise, he tugged on your wrist and pulled you in to his chest before connecting your lips together in a sweet kiss. His lips were so soft and tasted like bubblegum—he lowered his hands to your waist while licking on your bottom lip, ultimately bringing it in between his teeth. The two of you made out for a couple of minutes until Mark abruptly pulled away. Right as you were about to whine at the loss of his lips against yours, he hid his face in the crook of your neck and giggled softly.

“I like you y/n—a lot more than I’d like to admit actually. If I’m being honest, I think it might be more than that. I’ve liked you from the minute my dad had me shadow you and if I’m being honest, I kind of hinted towards wanting to be partnered up with you because I witnessed how amazing your work ethic is and I’ve admired how intelligent and talented you are. I think my dad talks more highly about you than he does me and I can see why—you’re wonderful y/n. These last few weeks with you has been some of the best moments of my entire life. You make me so happy. I would have never thought that I would actually enjoy going to work as much as I do and it’s specifically because I want to see you. Would you—um—maybe want to be my girlfriend? I totally understand if you don’t want to and please don’t feel as if you have to reciprocate my same feelings because I’m going to be your boss or because you feel bad—��

You didn’t allow him to say anything else before you roughly smashed your lips back up against his. Now that you knew how it felt like to kiss him—something you’ve been dreaming about for quite some time now, you would never get enough of having his lips meld perfectly in unison with yours.

“I like you too Mark. You don’t understand how happy I am—I’m sure you’ve caught me stealing glances at you every now and then. I would doze off sometimes and dream about what it would be like to be the lucky girl who gets to love you and be loved by you. I would love to be your girlfriend. If you don’t have to go yet, did you maybe want to uh—come inside for some coffee?”

He beamed at you and nodded in excitement—it didn’t take a genius to know that coffee was not at all going to be involved in the nights festivities and he couldn’t care less. He’d be lying if he said he hasn’t dreamt about being intimate with you and getting to see you naked and bare—writhing underneath him while begging him to do anything to soothe the fire building inside of you. It’s happened on many occasions and he isn’t embarrassed to say a lot of his wet dreams were caused by you. As soon as you both made your way inside, he pressed you up against the door and began leaving sloppy kisses on the expanse of your neck and chest while whispering sweet nothings against your jaw.

That entire night was spent relishing in your newfound relationship in your bed, in the shower, on the counter and up against your fridge. From that night on, the two of you were inseparable—it wasn’t much of a change from your usual time spent together other than him being even more clingy and touchier now that the two of you were a couple. Plus, you got to see him on the weekends which was a bonus—even if you spent almost ten hours a day every single day with him, it was never enough.

Both you and your boyfriend decided to keep your relationship a secret from everyone at the company to prevent people from talking negatively of you or assuming that you were only dating Mark for beneficial reasons which was far from the truth. You didn’t think it was possible for Mark to be an even more amazing boyfriend than he was a business partner, but he proved you wrong entirely. He was so shy and soft whenever it came to you.

Although he practically hovered over your tiny frame, the older boy would follow you around like a lost puppy. He would show up to your apartment every morning and take you with him to work so you didn’t have to worry about transportation. He would also wait until you were finished with work if he just so happened to end earlier that you did in order to take you home. If Mark was anything, it was extremely observant.

It took him less than a week to learn your coffee order, he’d purchase all kinds of things for you while he’d go grocery shopping, he would buy you bags and clothes that he thought would look amazing on you, he would write you cute little post it notes and stick it all around your desk and if you were to catch a cold or if you weren’t feeling all too well, he’d take off from work in order to help nurse you back to health—in more ways than one. You never thought you would ever be able to experience the love Mark was giving to you.

You’ve only ever been in two actual relationships before him. Other than that, you were the type of person who enjoyed to fool around. Whenever you and your friends would go out to clubs and bars, you’d find yourself getting drunk and taking someone home whose name you’d never got around to learning. If you were being honest, you never thought you would ever be in a long term relationship before.

Your parents divorced when you were only two years old and it seemed like most of the adults you were surrounded with just so happened to be divorced also. Love was a foreign word to you—you never believed love could exist. Everything you’ve seen in movies was fake; all these shows and books about men who would give their lives for their significant others, you thought it was complete and utter bullshit. You ended up breaking up with both your boyfriends because you were afraid of getting your heart broken.

It wasn’t like either of them really made you feel loved or genuinely cared for in the first place, so breaking up with them didn’t hurt as much as you expected to. That all changed the minute you found yourself falling in love with Mark. Time and time again, you told yourself you would never allow yourself to make such a stupid mistake—nor did you want to give your heart, mind, spirit and just yourself entirely away to someone who would only break your heart and leave you like it is the easiest thing do to.

For years, you’ve put up this barrier around your heart and kept every single person out of it. However, you didn’t know how he did it—but Mark knock down your walls and made you want to fall in love with him. Even before you really got to know him and how he was as a person, you know you could trust him. You wanted to give yourself a chance at love; it’s what you deserved. You couldn’t keep running away from something so good—or someone who obviously loved you more than life itself just because you didn’t want them to hurt you.

The way he took care of you—even if you weren’t necessarily aware of it; the way he looked at you with so much adoration and happiness, the way he would talk so highly about you to everyone he surrounded himself with made it all the more clear that you must have meant a lot to Mark and you weren’t going to let anything or anyone for that matter get in the way of experiencing what true love felt like. Not once in your relationship with Mark did you ever have to worry about getting hurt—you knew that man loved you with his entire being. He never failed to show you or tell you every single day and sometimes you had a hard time accepting that someone could love you so much in the way Mark evidently did.

Mark Tuan had to be the best thing that has ever happened to you and you were never going to take him for granted. He was the man you knew you wanted so badly to spend the rest of your life with—there was nobody in this world that you loved or could ever love more than you did with him. He captivated your heart in ways you didn’t believe was possible. Honestly, there were times where you felt as though he deserved better.

You didn’t think all that highly of yourself; sure you had a pretty high position at his company for someone who was only 21-years-old and you were obviously well educated, but you weren’t very sociable nor did you think you were as street smart as you were book smart. You also never considered yourself to be attractive; you’d stare at yourself in the mirror ever now and then and picked out a lot of your features that you didn’t like about yourself.

There were days that you thought everything about you was ugly; your teeth were crooked, your eyebrows were bushy, you had chubby cheeks, you were on the more curvy side—you had thick thighs, decent sized breasts and your butt was on the bigger side, but you also had big hips and your stomach wasn’t as flat as you wish it would be. On many occasions, you found yourself growing jealous of a few of the employees at the company because a lot of them were so pretty and had petite, dainty bodies.

No matter how many times your boyfriend would remind you on a daily basis that he thought your body was so beautiful and that he was completely obsessed with each and every curve, beauty mark and birth mark scattered along your skin, your insecurities never failed to get the best of you and you’d always tell yourself that he probably wanted someone with the body of a model. However, you would observe Mark just as much as he did with you; he never batted an eye at any other girl—even when he talked to one of your colleagues, he seemed so disinterested and it made your heart flutter.

You wanted nothing more than to be content with the fact that your boyfriend only had eyes for you, but it was only natural for you to feel as though you weren’t good enough for him. There was an insult on the tip of your tongue; you wanted to ask her what she had in mind and hoped that it was worse than your idea so she would look like a complete dumbass, but luckily—Mark beat you to it.

“Decent? I think you mean brilliant—and no Megan, I do not allow my personal affairs to conflict with my work ethic. I genuinely like y/n’s idea and I would support her even if we weren’t dating. Do you have any better ideas?”

You didn’t have to confess anything out loud; Mark could read your body language like it was a picture book. He knew you better than he knew himself and even better than you knew yourself. With the way you tightened your fists and clenched your jaw, he knew you were seconds away from reaching across the table and pulling on Megan’s hair and if he was telling the truth—he was all for it. Your boyfriend knew all about your ill-relationship with the older girl—he wasn’t blind. Your mood was always quick to change from excited and bubbly to quiet and visibly annoyed whenever she came around.

He wasn’t the kind of person to press you for information if you didn’t want to flat out tell him yourself. He did wish you would tell him though; he wanted to know everything that was bothering you or things that made you upset—if there was anything Mark loathed, it was seeing you sad. His sole purpose was to make sure you were constantly happy, healthy and living the best life possible.

As a CEO, he couldn’t fire her for the reason that she was tormenting you; there was no evidence. But as your boyfriend, he could use his title against her and he always used that to his advantage—to protect you. You had to bite your lip to prevent yourself from laughing at the sight of her now defeated demeanor.

“No sir.” Mark sent you a cheeky wink before clapping his hands together and getting up from his seat.

“What does everyone else think about the radio station and television commercial ad idea?” Everyone around you nodded their heads in agreement and some even gave your boyfriend a thumbs up—you weren’t one to boast nor did you particularly find contentment in proving others wrong unless they deserved it and Megan definitely deserved the shade your boyfriend gave her.

“Good, then it’s settled. If anyone has any better ideas—then feel free to bring it to the next meeting. But until then, we’ll go along with what y/n pitched and take it from there. I have some phone calls I have to make, so I’ll be taking my leave. Good job everyone.” Mark bowed to the entire table and quickly made his way towards the door but not before walking over to you and gently squeezing your shoulder.

“No rush, but can you come to my office once you wrap things up here? I want to talk more about your idea.”

You nodded in agreement even if you knew that you and your boyfriend would only briefly go over what was brought up in the meeting before doing something you both shouldn’t do in a work environment. The meeting only lasted for a couple of minutes after Mark had left—all the employees in attendance were extremely supportive of what you came up with and you couldn’t have been more thrilled and grateful with their responses.

Right after you adjourned the meeting, you made a beeline for Mark’s office; not wanting anyone—specifically Megan to keep you from your boyfriend any longer. When you noticed her approaching, you quickened your pace and made sure she was no longer tailing you once you reached Mark’s door. You knocked gently and waited patiently for him to invite you in and as soon as he called out for you to enter, you made your way inside and gave him no time to process your movements before flopping on to his lap and wrapping your arms around his neck. A soft giggle fell from his lips as he brought his hands down to your waist and held you tightly against his body.

“You’re amazing and I love you. Thank you baby.” His laughter filled the room—going straight to your chest and making warmth rise upon your cheeks. For someone who was only three years away from turning thirty, he had the most adorable, high pitched laugh that you knew could light up any room he was in.

“You’re the one whose amazing and I meant what I said—your idea is brilliant. Almost as brilliant as you my love. You never cease to amaze me. Did you see the look on Megan’s face when I indirectly called her out? That shit was priceless I wish I got it on camera. By the way—why didn’t you tell me about how she acts towards you earlier? I’m not stupid y/n, I know there must be some kind of animosity between the two of you and I know you’re not the cause of it. You know you can trust me with these things. What else does she do to you? Nobody treats my baby so unfairly and can expect me not to do anything about it.”

You brought your hand up to his cheek and cupped it ever so gently before placing a chaste kiss on the corner of his mouth. He smiled softly against your lips and stole a couple more kisses before leaning back in his chair in order to get a better look at you.

“I didn’t want to bother you with something I can handle on my own. I’m a big girl Mark and I don’t let shit like that bother me. I don’t know why she acts like this, I didn’t do anything to her—and I don’t want everyone here to think that I’m not capable of fighting my own battles and that I have to have my boyfriend use his power to fight them for me. I’m sure a lot of employees gossip to each other about our relationship—“

“Who cares what anyone says? Our relationship is nobody’s business but our own. I just—I’m sorry, hearing her try to make you seem so small—so incapable of great things pissed me the fuck off. You’re the hardest worker we have in this entire company and I’m not just saying that because you’re the love of my life. I’m saying it because I’ve watched you work your ass off for the last four years taking on overtime, flying all around the world to meet with and make business with all these important companies, staying up all night to study for exams only to come in the next morning like you weren’t exhausted at all. You are an ethereal being baby. You’re otherworldly and I just can’t stop looking at you in astonishment. I hope you know Megan and every other girl who acts that way towards you is just jealous of you and I don’t blame them. I mean, just look at you.”

The tears were hot as they built up at the brim of your eyelids. This happened almost every single day. Mark had a habit of going in to detail about the love he had for you and how wonderful he thought you were and you were never prepared to hear his complements and sweet words.

“I don’t know what they would be jealous about Mark. Like you said, look at me—“

“I am looking at you. I can’t seem to stop looking at you. All I ever want to do for the rest of my life is look at you and admire you for the extraordinary human being that you are. You are the most beautiful girl in the world, I’m being completely honest y/n. You are so fucking gorgeous, I can’t even form your beauty in to words. You’re honestly God’s favorite and definitely mine. I hate that you think so negatively about yourself when I think the world of you. I know there’s no such thing as a perfect person but damnit y/n, you come very close. I really don’t know what I did to deserve you—and yes, I know what you’re thinking and you can just get rid of the thought that you’re not good enough for me out of your mind completely. Y/n, you are the best thing to ever happen to me—I mean that wholeheartedly. All my life, I felt as though something was missing but I could never put my finger on it. When I met you, everything changed and it just clicked. You were my missing puzzle piece—you’ve brought so much love and light in to my life and I’m forever thankful for being blessed with you to be my person.”

You allowed the tears to fall from your eyelids and a small sob left your throat leading Mark to laugh against your jaw while bringing you closer to his chest. He began to run his fingers through your hair and left a few gentle kisses all around your face.

“God Mark, I don’t know what I did to deserve you but I would do it again and again—I would lead and fight an entire world war if it meant getting to be the person you love in each and every single lifetime. I can’t even—I know I tell you that I love you every single day but I can’t help to feel as though it’s not enough. I wish there was more I could say or do to show you just how much I truly, deeply and irrevocably love you, how you mean the entire world to me and how I would be completely nothing without you. I wish I could see myself the way you see me—from your point of view. I want to trust and believe in myself the way you do. I wish I could love myself, the way you love me. I’m trying to learn to love myself because I know you worry about me and I don’t want you to anymore. I want to make you proud Mark—“

“You do make me proud y/n—every single day. I know you want to keep us a secret for reasons I have yet to understand—I’m sure now it has to do with people like Megan, but you shouldn’t care about what anyone thinks about you other than yourself and me. I think you’re the most astounding person I have ever met. It’s okay if you never learn to love yourself baby—I love you enough for the both of us and I will spend the rest of my life reminding you just how much of a wonderful, amazing, beautiful both on the inside and out and extremely sexy woman you are.”

He stole a few sloppy kisses from the corner of your mouth and began grazing your cheek feather lightly.

“You don’t have to do anything more to prove your love for me, I feel it in my heart. You’re the reason it beats by the way. You keep my blood rushing and my veins pumping. I would give up anything and everything—this job, my family, my friends, hell I would even give up my PlayStation 5 for you and that says a lot baby. You’re all I could ever want and need in my life. Now, if you want to show me some gratitude for loving you so much and for being your backbone today, maybe you could help me fix the problem in my pants that you caused as soon as I saw you leave the bathroom this morning wearing this outfit. Did I tell you how breathtakingly beautiful and devastatingly sexy you look right now? You know what was so hard for me—well, other than my painfully hardened erection, but it was seeing you in this skirt and blouse—watching you tell everyone of your plans with so much confidence and observing the way all the men in there were looking at you with desire in their eyes and not being able to walk up to you and kiss you with all my energy. I would have fucked you right there on the table if I could. But now that we’re both on lunch break—I’m all for eating you out right now. Lunch with a view sounds amazing and I’m not talking about the cityscape babe.”

You playfully shoved him while attempting to get out of his embrace but he wasn’t having any of it and tightened his grip around your waist if it was even possible. “Mark, we can’t have sex right now, everyone is going to find out what we’re doing. You and I are not exactly the quietest people when we have sex—“

He gave you the most adorable pout before bringing his lips right under your ear and nibbling tenderly—trying to get a rise out of you. “Why not? We’ve made love in here many times y/n. I daydream about the multiple times I fucked in to you auto against this desk and against the window. The imprint of your breast on the glass is still in the back of my mind. Who cares if they hear? All the more better. I saw the way all the men would let their eyes linger on you a little too long. I think it’s time they are reminded that your bed is spoken for. It’ll also teach anyone in this building not to mess with you. Don’t try to talk me out of it, I know you’re a huge exhibitionist baby. There’s this one particular position that I wanted to try out if you’re okay with it. I’m going to need you to get on all fours and this blouse, as amazing as it looks on you, I want to see these pretty titties bounce for me. Get ready to sing my love—I’m going to make sure everyone on this floor knows whose the boss in more ways than one.”

I'm getting used to receiving Still getting good at not leaving I'ma love you even though I'm scared Learnin' to be grateful for myself You love my lips 'cause they say the Things we've always been afraid of I can feel it starting to subside Learnin' to believe in what is mine

I wanna love me (ooh) The way that you love me (ooh) Ooh, for all of my pretty and all of my ugly too I'd love to see me from your point of view I wanna trust me (trust me) The way that you trust me (trust me) Ooh, 'cause nobody ever loved me like you do I'd love to see me from your point of view

I couldn't believe it Or see it for myself Know I be impatient But now I'm out here fallin', fallin' Frozen, slowly thawing, got me right I won't keep you waitin', waitin' All my baggage fadin' safely (baggage fadin') And if my eyes deceive me Won't let them stray too far away

I wanna love me (ooh) The way that you love me (ooh) Ooh, for all of my pretty and all of my ugly too I'd love to see me from your point of view I wanna trust me, ooh (trust me) The way that you trust me, baby (trust me) 'Cause nobody ever loved me like you do I'd love to see me from your point of view, yeah

#got7 imagines #mark tuan #got7 #mark tuan imagines #mark tuan got7

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recurring-polynya · 4 years ago

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What are your feelings on the 11 division (the characters that matter)

Sooooo... I like the Squad 11 folks as side characters and world building. I like people who like Squad 11, and I enjoy seeing fanfic takes on them. I like writing them myself, because I like to write stories about Renji and Ikkaku and Yumichika are excellent foils for him.

I think IkkaYumi is a cute ship and I enjoy fanworks for it. I headcanon them both as 100% gay, and I always get a chuckle out of old fanfics that attempt to cram them into hetero ships. I headcanon Kenpachi as aroace, but I wish nothing but joy and peace to the many Kenpachi-fuckers on this website.

All that being said, I don’t really vibe with them as characters. I am a pacifist. I value kindness and thoughtfulness and cleverness and adaptability. I would be kicked out of Squad 11 immediately. I wrote a Squad 11 fic recently as a request and I struggled with it a lot, because I couldn’t get all the way into the characters’ heads.

I have more Squad 11 thoughts, but they are not very nice. I am not out to ruin anyone’s day here on tumblr dot com, so I’m gonna put these under a cut, and please feel free to move past this if you aren’t in the mood to have your beloved meatheads subjected to Polynya Amateur Literary Criticism Hour: Squad 11 Edition.

Okay, you’re still here. First and foremost, all of this applies only to canon. There are many wonderful Squad 11 fanficcers out there putting in the effort and doing great work. Any of the things I mention below can be overcome by good enough writing and love for the characters.

- Yumichika is canonically transphobic and that bothers me a ton. It’s not just, like, a brief moment, either, Kubo just really leaned into it, right up through the last arc. I struggle from time to time with being a hardcore fan of a work that spits on people I care about. I have definitely considered quitting the fandom over it, but I do feel like an important role of transformative works is reclaiming the things you love. There are a lot of cool gay and trans folks in the Bleach fandom and I have never seen a single fan who enjoyed or defended the transphobia, so I make an uneasy peace with it. It seems to be fanon consensus to just... ignore it, which is what I do most of the time, but I don’t feel great about it.

- Relatedly, I think Yumichika’s whole love-of-beauty deal could have been done in a very cool and interesting way and Kubo just played it for (unfunny) laughs instead. There are many fanficcers who are doing a far better job at this and we are lucky to have them.

- I think that Ikkaku and Kenpachi are both transcendentally stupid and I love them this way. People try to convince me from time to time that there is more going on in those empty skulls than it seems, and I may smile and nod, but I honestly prefer them as numbskulls.

- Ikkaku and Yumichika each only get 2/3 of a character arc, which is frustrating. They have these dumb fighting philosophies that are clearly harmful to them and do not work well for them, but there’s no closure to it. Yumichika may have done some soul searching during the timeskip, since he’s using high level kidou in the TYBWA, but we didn’t get to see any of it. There are several places where Ikkaku is compared with Iba, who values well-roundedness, and eventually becomes a captain, a position he admits he doesn’t feel like he deserves. This is a bad juxtaposition, because Ikkaku doesn’t want to be a captain anyway. A much better comparison is Renji. Renji is Ikkaku’s student, and is shown as clearly deferring to him, even once he’s a lieutenant. Renji, perhaps better than anyone else, follows Zaraki’s philosophy of “if you lose, consider yourself lucky and live to fight another day.” However, Renji is willing to accept heals, fight with allies, and will do a kidou even though he’s terrible at it, all against the Squad 11 Way. By the time the TYBWA rolls around, Renji is a monster. I’m not sure Ikkaku could defeat any of the captains, and Renji rolls in and shrugs off an enemy who just trashed two captains and a lieutenant without breaking a sweat. If they ever do fight again, Ikkaku is not going to be the one telling Renji his name before he kills him and I think this is important.

- The difference between Zaraki and Ikkaku (and everyone else, really) is that Zaraki is so freakishly strong that he can follow his own stupid rules and still come out on top. He can’t do kidou anyway and he can’t unseal his sword and he can’t work with others because his reiatsu is too strong, so they don’t really make a difference. Everyone else who is following Zaraki’s rules is just hobbling themselves.

- A theme of Bleach is that the greatest power comes in the interface between different kinds of beings and by combining different techniques. This is Aizen’s whole deal, not to mention things like kidou combos and shunko. It would have been cool and more balanced and actually make sense to have characters who focus on one thing be stronger than those who split their efforts, but that is shown time and again to not be the case. Diversification is better, which just makes Squad 11 seem even stupider. They say in the Soul Society Arc that Squad 11 is the strongest, but have we ever seen evidence of this? It just... seems like a lie they made up? (which, I’m fine with, it’s part of the overall dysfunction of Soul Society and I support this world-building). Perhaps it’s just true at low levels, because pretty much all shinigami below lieutenant suck.

- I despise the fact that they killed off Unohana to make Kenpachi stronger. I like to joke that Unohana faked her own death to get the hell out of that arc, but there’s honestly no other way to interpret that than “a man’s potential is more important that a woman’s lived experience” and Kubo can fuck off with that shit.

- It didn’t even make any damn sense! How on earth is a Kenpachi-who-has-realized-his-own-strength better than Regular Kenpachi + Unohana Who Is No Longer Fucking Around? uidghqueghiqergoiewkrgljek

- Up until this point, I have enjoyed the humor in Kenpachi’s character in the sense that he never really tries, and when he does, it’s something insanely dumb like “use two hands” and he makes a huge deal out of it, but then to turn it around and be like “oh, but he’s so strong he’s more important than someone else’s life even though he doesn’t put anything into it,” is just really galling and I hate it.

- I reject the notion that Kenpachi is a “good dad.” He hangs out with a small child. That is not parenting. We never see him providing for Yachiru, advising her through a difficulty, imparting values to her, or even teaching her anything. Mostly, we see her supporting him, when she’s not running around unsupervised. She is, in fact, static, un-growing and unchanging. For all we know, she may de-materialize for large stretches of time. (Once again: I have read very good fanfics about Zaraki being a father, I just don’t think it’s supported by the text). I actually think that’s kind of cool, that he’s just out here vibing with a small child that is really a projection of his own soul, but I do not like it being credited to him as if he's up early baking allergy-free muffins for her or negotiating IEPs.

- The Gremmy - Kenpachi fight was interminable. I did rather like the ending, where Gremmy’s body wasn’t strong enough, but it took so long to get there and it was not worth it.

- I am only interested in Yachiru as a feral zanpakutou spirit. Small children are not particularly interesting to me as characters. I wish that there had been some sort of spiritual connection between her and Unohana, like if she had splintered off of Unohana’s own zanpakutou in order to go make a shinigami strong enough for Unohana to fight. That would have slapped.

- It would have been much cooler if Yachiru had killed Zaraki or absorbed him into herself somehow and gone on to be the new Kenpachi, with Unohana as her mentor.

#squad 11 #i don't like to be negative but also...like...you ASKED #this is what happens when i think too hard about stuff!!#please don't cancel me!#i know i shouldn't have written any of this my squad 11 takes are always getting me in trouble

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an-avid-reader · 4 years ago

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The Hate U Give - Angie Thomas

my rating: 5/5 stars

On the night of a party gone wrong in Garden Heights, or “the hood”, Starr and her childhood best friend, Khalil, drive away only to be stopped by a white police officer. Khalil, unarmed, gets shot right in front of Starr’s eyes. Alas, Starr’s worlds—Garden Heights and Williamson, a predominantly white prep school—collide as word of Khalil’s death spreads and she is the only witness. Will Starr be able to bring justice to Khalil via riot and protests, or will he be remembered as a drug dealer and a thug?

"Funny how it works with white kids though. It's dope to be black until it's hard to be black"

Link to Goodreads || Spoiler-free review

A few things to check out:

Dear White People (Netflix)

When They See Us (Netflix)

Why I’m No Longer Talking to White People About Race (Book)

A list of places to donate to / one YT video if you’re unable to donate

Here’s a post that is much more comprehensive

let me know if any of the links don’t work, I will update them :)

There’s a reason why this book has quite a few awards on the front—this book covers what some may consider a “taboo” topic aka racism, but it’s an issue. I’m writing this review slightly earlier than before I’m posting it, but right now the current news is about George Floyd’s death, which is arguably more brutal than what happened in this book, but the fact that some police officers still think race has something to do with one’s intentions is outrageous and disgusting. Even in Canada, there have been instances of racism across history (spoiler: Canada isn’t a ‘saint nation’, even though the population is very diverse).

For these reasons, I think this book, while it is triggering, I think it should be fit into the curriculum for students to read so that they may be educated on racism, and how it can literally kill others, as well as to try and dismantle the systematic racism that is imposed on us from a young age. I can never sit here and tell you that I can experience what Starr went through (or what any POC—black or otherwise—has ever been through), I can only educate myself and emphasize with what’s been said/done to you—please call me out if I’ve said something that may be offensive and feel free to correct me if I’ve said anything wrong.

Alright now on with the book review! This book is so raw and powerful, Thomas does a great job of describing the scenes and the emotions Starr goes through during each scene. We get to see how she feels about dating a white boy while being black herself, how her neighbourhood is beautiful despite it being described as the hood, we also get to see how Starr’s demeanor completely changes while she’s at school vs when she’s visiting her family. While Thomas’ writing may be simple, she does a great job of capturing those moments and the emotions tied within the scene.

As we get to see Starr becoming a witness and taking legal action, I wasn’t sure where the story was headed. Would Khalil get justice and would the cop go to jail? How would Starr’s mental health be affected? Will her family be okay? (Don’t you just love it when there’s so much more conflict in the story that needs to be resolved and yet there are only 2 chapters left) Etc. etc. The thing about The Hate U Give is that there are multiple story lines, which help to drive the story forwards. Those plotlines didn’t feel out of place or forced—everything seemed to progress at a reasonable pace.

I feel like one of the key parts of this story are the characters and their dynamics to the story. The most obvious being between Starr and her family. Although Starr has her own secrets that she keeps from her dad (*cough cough* Chris *cough cough*), I feel like they still have a strong bond, especially as the story went on and her dad, Maverick, stood behind Starr, even when things went south. (I could also 100% relate to Starr bickering with her brothers—even her half-brother). Then there’s Chris, which I kinda feel weird about him...which I feel like it’s a spoiler so I’ll talk about it under the cut. Overall, I’m glad that while he doesn’t understand what Starr has been through, he doesn’t judge her—he listens to her story and he also stays by Starr’s side at all times. I appreciate that Thomas didn’t put too much focus on the romance, otherwise I think it would’ve detracted from the main message. Finally, there are Starr friends. Even though we only got to know Khalil for a bit at the beginning, I like that Starr’s friendship with him was sprinkled throughout the story, even if it was in subtle ways. You could tell that, while their friendship may have fallen apart, Starr really cared for him and he was at the forefront of her mind. We also get to see Maya and Haliey’s friendship with Starr...and I can’t talk much about that without spoilers :/ let’s just say...it was interesting…

While I can’t exactly relate to Starr on an emotional/traumatic/life experience level, I love that we are both Harry Potter fans and she runs a Tumblr (which idk why but I’m always taken aback when books have Tumblrs?? Yet here we are). I appreciate that she tries to see the best in people, until they prove her wrong (or give her a reason to not like them). I think Starr is a strong role model in the sense that she stands up for herself and is determined to get justice, although she’s not cocky about it. It’s quite the opposite, she doubts herself—I just remember that there were so many parts where she blamed herself for not recalling every single detail of the incident or not putting emphasis on the type of person Khalil was to avoid him getting stereotyped. Starr also questioned her relationship with Chris, albeit she seemed a bit naive at some points. Because of Starr’s strong personality and her core values, the message of The Hate U Give is so much stronger, hence why I feel like everyone should read this novel.

Finally, I learned a lot from this novel. Regardless of the fact that this is a fictional book, it is very much based on the realities of Black people and the hardships they must endure on a daily basis. To be honest, I feel so dumb for not even realizing that the title spells out THUG and runs parallel with Tupac’s meaning of THUG LIFE. Mind you, now when I look at the cover, it’s all I see. I also didn’t realize that Black kids and teens are taught how to act around the police—all to be avoided to get arrested, shot, or killed—which is frankly, messed up. Thomas also takes the time to address the names she used, intentionally to give another layer of the book, which I feel that it is based on reality. I can definitely see why this book has received so many awards—and if this book were implemented in schools, it would allow the discussion on racism to be opened and it would also allow kids to see that not all authors are white, old men (looking at you, Shakespeare, which tbh the only good play I read was Macbeth).

I wanted to thank you for reading my review; if you’ve read this book, I’d love to know your thoughts. Below the cut, I have a spoiler section that I wanted to include (which I might add in future reviews, idk though).

Please stay safe and healthy,

~ Cassandra / an-avid-reader

THE REMAINDER OF THIS REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS

Okay, I’m not going to lie, but I thought that no one knew about Chris; didn’t Starr mention within the first few chapters that she can’t introduce him to her family because she’s afraid of what they’ll say/judge her for dating a white boy? But then, it turns out it’s just her dad that doesn’t know about him??? Idk if my memory is really that bad or if it’s such a slim detail (maybe it actually is an inconsistency o.O). But anyways, I love how Maverick was just playing with him (and making it clear that Chris would be in big trouble if he hurt Starr). I’m also not sure if he has a fetish for Black women (which Starr also pointed that out)—which I don’t know how to feel about that. I know some people have a thing for people of colour (Asians are commonly a fetish too, for example) but then some guys also have a thing for super short girls? Um yeah. I’ll probably leave it at that.

I’m not sure if it was just me, but I deadass thought Seven was going to be a gangbanger. He was sooooo suspicious anytime King was mentioned (which I get King is with Seven’s biological mom, but still I can’t be the only one who was suspicious, right?). I have to give him props though for putting his sisters’ needs before his own and for also listening to Iesha’s point of view. This man doesn’t give on people easily, and that’s a nice change.

The last thing I wanted to include in this spoiler section is Haliey. I just— wtf man. She perfectly embodies the issue and idk she gave me such Karen vibes. It’s so frustrating that she just accepted the newspaper’s article story at face value—I don’t even think she even took the time to listen to the other point of view. I’m so glad that Starr punched her in the face, even though that resulted in her getting in trouble. And it’s not even towards just Starr that she was racist! When Maya opened up about Haliey’s comments, I was pretty infuriated. I think Haliey’s comments came from a place of ignorance or a lack of education, but it just bothered me that she just brushed it off. Smh “it was just a joke” or “get over it” *rolls eyes* Just apologize, Haliey, and educate yourself, please. Actually, maybe she could take lessons from Mr. Warren, their english teacher because he was lowkey a G. I was pleased to see he was a teacher (who are often seen as role models) that actually gave a crap about Starr and what she was going through. I guess we just need to be more attentive to what people have to say and be more empathetic when they’re hurt.

#just one more ~ queue #book review #the hate u give #angie thomas #blm #black awareness #booklr #reading #read #favourite

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kinetic-elaboration · 4 years ago

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December 29: The Wrath of Khan

Today’s movie watching was Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.

My overall impression versus TMP is that this is clearly a smoother and more consistently entertaining film. It has a definite story with very little filler, good pacing, a lot of great little dialogue and character moments, and a strong conflict at its center.

But its sci fi bona fides are much weaker. Like by a lot.

Mom and I are talking a bit about Genesis and the more we talk, the weaker it appears to me. First, it’s not really as believable, imo, as a lot of Star Trek. Maybe it’s because it’s not alien based, but I just have a harder time suspending disbelief to think this is possible. Second, it’s not clear why anyone thought this was a good idea. I mean, as McCoy immediately pointed out, it just seems so CLEARLY dangerous: an object meant to foster creation that could so easily be the worst weapon the universe has ever known--nothing could go awry there! Third, the reason for creating such a device isn’t obvious at all. Carol mentions the “growing population” and “food scarcity” but nothing we’ve ever seen of the Federation implies they’re running out of space. Or, frankly (Tarsus IV aside), food. And fourth, there really isn’t any point to Genesis in all its particulars in this film. Like, obviously, its actual purpose is a plot device to resurrect Spock. Within just this film, it doesn’t do anything. Khan wants it, for some reason I’ve already forgotten even though I just saw the film, and he gets it, but I didn’t even notice that happening, because it was so unimportant. His REAL mission is his single minded revenge fantasy on Kirk. Genesis is just a McGuffin/space filler/plot device for the next film.

And honestly that’s not such a big deal, except that when you compare it to TMP, ,and its central idea of a human made probe that gained so much knowledge, doing what we taught it to do, that it became sentient and then started searching for the meaning of life, and how this relates to the search for meaning experienced by the main alien lead, and how his search, in that film and throughout the series, is a mirror for humans and OUR need for purpose... well it just seems really weak. “We made this really dangerous and unrealistic thing for no reason whoops!”

Mom is now criticizing Kirk for being too slow on the uptake when he first encounters the Reliant, which is fair. That’s pretty OOC of him. The idea that he’s too old for space is both one that I must personally disregard, and one that the film would have you discard, since we’ve already heard from TWO characters, the people who know him best, that his best destiny is as a starship captain, and command is his proper role. And that he might be a little rusty is also not a great explanation imo, because the rust was supposed to have come off in TMP. So, plot hole probably.

We were trying to do some math--TMP is at least 2 years post 5YM and TWOK is at least 10 years post TMP, so at least 8 years post TMP. I can understand more rust growing but like... he was already an Admiral in TMP and the idea that he was out of practice with actual command was a big part of his arc there. So it doesn’t seem warranted to do that again.

Also, the way he was commanding poorly in TMP was very IC: he was pushing too hard, trying too much, caring too much about the mission and not enough about...the laws of physics. That’s very Kirk. Being slow on the uptake, caught with his britches down--that’s not Kirk. Plus, with no one to call him out on it, like Decker did in TMP, his poor command doesn’t seem like a big character obstacle to overcome but just like...sloppiness all around.

I thought Khan was over all... just not that interesting. I guess I’m just not into the obsession/revenge plot. Also...idk man he didn’t seem that super to me. He outsmarted Kirk, like, once, and Kirk outsmarted him like 4 times. He tortured some people--but regular humans can do that. He used those sandworm thingies, which is also something humans could do. Overall, he didn’t seem to have any particularly special skills. The only time he really seemed like a worthy adversary for Kirk was when Kirk wasn’t really being IC himself.

I’m also not into the fridging of his wife. Think how much cooler it would have been if she’d still been alive! The only non-super human in the bunch and she’s still there! Ex-Starfleet and bitter!

The K/S in this film is very soothing. Imo they are clearly together here, and the whole film is better if you assume they’re boyfriends and everyone knows. That Vulcan convo that Spock and Saavik have? Waaaaay funnier if you think she’s talking about his boyfriend (”not what I expected....very human” “Well no one’s perfect”). Every time they call each other ‘friend’ like ““friend”“? All the Looks? The birthday gift?

Also the “I have been and always shall be your [friend]” scene is a wedding I will not be taking criticism on this opinion. Could it have been written more like a vow? I think not. It’s not quite This Simple Feeling but it’s the best this film has in that regard.

I liked Saavik and I do think she’s one of the better later-movie additions (though I only like her, as far as I can remember, when played by Kirstie Alley). She didn’t necessarily strike me as super alien, though, at least not at first... But I appreciated how persistent she was about the stupid test, and her regulation quoting. I enjoyed her. I also liked how she was obviously Spock’s protege, which makes her Kirk’s step-protege, and they had just a little bit of that awkward dynamic going on. (”Did you change your hair?”)

The Bones and Kirk relationship was great in this film. You can really feel their friendship and their history with each other. Bones knows him so well and can be honest with him, just when Kirk needs it most.

I also love how Kirk has the SAME conversation with both Bones and Spock (re: being a captain again) but with Spock it’s sooooo much flirtier. In case you weren’t sure what the difference in these two relationships is.

Bonus: this bit of dialogue: Spock: “Be careful, Jim.” / Bones: “WE will.” Lol Spock people who aren’t your boyfriend do exist.

Obviously, I cried during THAT scene. Honestly AOS should have taken note about how to do emotional scenes like that: they come after the main action is over and the villain is defeated. Then they hit at the right time and to the right degree. Kirk just slumping down after Spock dies....like he’s boneless...like he doesn’t know what to do... I CANNOT.

I feel so bad for him that I’ll even forgive him that awful eulogy. Spock died for Genesis? Uh, no, he died for the Enterprise, and for YOU. Spock is the “most human”? You shut your whoreson mouth

I remember hating both Carol and David but I actually hated them less this time, Carol especially. My mom is being really harsh about her, though, which makes me feel less confident in my assessment. I mean first off, she’s the inventor of Genesis, which is a pretty big strike against her. Second...pretty lame to keep Kirk from David. Although I did some vague math and Kirk would only have been about 21, still in the Academy, when David was born, so you can see how that would work out. Also, she distinctly says “Were we together?” which means they were not--this was a fuck buddy arrangement for sure. More complicated. But it still feels weird to retcon that, like, he’s known THIS WHOLE TIME that he’s a dad and we’re only learning about it now, as an audience.

Anyway I’m getting off track. Carol. What to make of her? Is she unstable? Is she still mad at Kirk? My mom points out that she just decided on her own that David would want to join Starfleet if he knew Kirk was his father--whereas what seems to have happened instead is he didn’t just become a civilian scientist like his mom but became her specific protege--working on a project where everyone was probably handpicked by her? I would assume? Also..he hates Starfleet. Not to put everything on the mom, but how did that happen?

Also...going down the rabbit hole of this and feeling awkward about it... but David KNEW Kirk. As “that guy you hung around with.” That means Kirk was in his life for quite a while, long enough for him to have memories, and long enough for those memories to still be with him even into his 20s. But he was never allowed to know who Kirk was. That means Carol’s rule must have been “You can see your son but you can’t tell him who you are” which in some way seems meaner to me than just “please don’t contact us again.” If he was already on his way into space, that could even make sense--”I know you’re not going to be able to be a family with us, so let’s not pretend, let’s make a clean break now.” But that wasn’t what happened!

Anyway whatever not to be HAICG!Kirk about this or anything lol

David is mostly annoying because he’s so anti-Kirk lol. I found him least annoying when he came around to Kirk at the end. Another big strike against him: he wore his sweater tied over his shoulders in such a Preppy manner. I honestly don’t see what about him is supposed to be reminiscent of Kirk.

David/Saavik was definitely happening lol. I wish I could have heard that conversation. It sounds like she told him a lot!!! Not sure why she attached herself to this particular annoying human so fast but I guess she did.

....I think that might be all. The uniforms and general styling were much better than TMP (though less funny/entertaining), and it was certainly an enjoyable overall yarn. A lot to pick apart and critique but in a fun way. Will probably watch The Search for Spock soon.

#the year 2020 #2020: star trek #2020: fandom thoughts #star trek tos

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alphabees-writes · 5 years ago

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Glee - S1 E4 (Preggers)

And from this moment onwards, Kurt Hummel proceeded to steal every single damn scene he was in. I’m actually unironically excited for this one. I didn’t think that could still happen! Here goes!

I will always love this Single Ladies scene. I will always love season 1′s Tina/Kurt friendship. Also, Brittany’s here, inexplicably. Did he pay her for this? In Pixie sticks, perhaps? Or Monopoly money?

“Kurt’s Superstar Playlist” is the most adorable name his playlist could possibly have. All we get to see on it are 4 Beyonce songs, and 1 Gwen Stefani - but it’s a cute little insight.

God sometimes I forget how cute Jenna Ushkowitz is and then this scene really slaps me round the face with it huh!!!

WHY are you filming this, Kurt? What are you using this for? I’d love to know. I’d say it’s just to check out his own dancing technique but it’s in black and white… Where are you posting this!!!

I want that swingy-suspended chair thing he has in his room sooooo bad

Ok now the fact that this is being filmed is giving me fic ideas…

BURT HUMMEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BURT F U C K I N G HUMMEL BABIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God the look of fear on all three of their faces when they see Burt??? Don’t you worry kids he’ll come around real soon…

Burt’s approving nod when he yanks on Kurt’s unitard… God I love this man.

The LOOK on Kurt’s FACE when Brittany says he’s on the football team… I can hear his inner monologue like “bitch we may be in the basement but I will make a window to throw you out of”

Kurt just wants to relate to his old man so bad :( Baby boy he’s already so damn proud of you!!! Also that LAUGH.

He really just slapped Tina’s ass! And she completely rolls with it, the absolute champion. Also, the subtitles Netflix provided me with were (smacks bottom) and I just love that.

Oh god it immediately cuts to the WORST scene. Terri learning to give birth. William Schuester trying to help. Just let me perish, RIB?

Shout out to Kendra’s actress for somehow managing to make her character even more despicable than Terri!

Actually the shit she says to Will here is almost valid… All three of them are fucking awful huh!

Seriously why are Kendra and Terri the best actresses on this whole show? It’s the only reason I care about this fake pregnancy arc anymore…

The teacher’s lounge is always either an arid, desolate wasteland, or the only watering hole within 100 miles where all the thirsty ass teachers congregate. Take your pick.

Why does Will pretend to hesitate before going to sit with Ken and Emma? They’re the only people we ever see you talk to dude!!!

Ken with the psychoanalysis, wow. Just hit her right there buddy!

THAT’S HOW SUE C’s IT!!!

Rachel really just EXPECTS every solo… I almost forgot how bad she was when she started. “Maria is MY part!” Not anymore!! Kudos to Lea Michele for managing to make Rachel really sound like she thinks she’s the victim when she really isn’t.

Tina’s face… She was seriously happy. Season 1 Rachel SUCKS for even trying to take this from her. She IS talented. She IS ready!

Everybody else knows it’s a fat load of BS… Kurt lowers his sunglasses to look at her like she’s a bug beneath his shoe. Also, Kurt, why sunglasses? You don’t start getting hangovers ‘til next episode, sweetie!!

“You’re trying to punish me” I think being a total martyr might be one of Rachel’s worst traits early on in the series. I get that performing is her deal, but she can’t even take a second to at least fake being happy for Tina? Unreal.

Everybody else just moving straight on with it is hilarious. They’re all so happy for Tina and don’t give a shit about Rachel’s melodrama, which I’m living for!

I wanna be all “Finn’s an arrogant bastard for assuming Kurt wanted to ask him to prom, grr!!” But then I remember Kurt’s canonically in love with him at this point, so I’ll let him off this time

Kurt’s devious little smile when he asks Finn for a favour… I love one (1) boy!

AHHH THE TRYOUT SCENE. INCREDIBLE. This might honestly be my favourite scene from season 1. It’s definitely up there, anyway.

Cute brotherly Furt moments. Finn putting that helmet on for him. “Red’s your colour!” And they DON’T make Kurt get all giggly about Finn just being nice to him? Kurt just telling him he’s really cool? Pure.

“Rehearsing–” “PRACTICING!”

Finn tells Kurt he’ll be murdered if he uses his music and Kurt comes straight back with that rum chocolate souffle line. This show would be NOTHING without Kurt.

And THIS is what I mean when I say Kurt was a Gryffindor from the get-go. Even now he’s refusing to be anything less than himself for anybody, even the jackasses that harass him every day when he’s on their pitch.

Shut the fuuuuuuuck up, Puck!

“Hi, I’m Kurt Hummel and I’ll be auditioning for the role of kicker.” What did we do to deserve him?

His starting pose… His hips… The footwork… “That was good, right?” His whole ATTITUDE. THE ROYAL WAVE.

As if the TV network would cancel Sue’s news segment for having a few Cheerios in the glee club?

Oh god. Quinn telling Finn she’s pregnant. The fucking cinematography here… The camera work, the audio mixing…

“Think of the mail… Think of the MAIL…”

Did Quinn seriously just say “Ask Jeeves” told her the hot tub could knock her up? I mean, I know she’s lying, but ASK JEEVES? That should’ve tipped Finn off more than anything else…

Damn. Season 1 really had the power to get me shook, laughing, and then crying in the span of 30 seconds? Or maybe it’s just because I can’t stand seeing Diana cry…

Sandy lets his kettle whistle for far too long, it stresses me out

Sue just… Offers this fired man a job? I know she’s got Figgins by the balls over the stockings commercial, but come on, surely the council would get involved or whatever???

Rachel sucks right now but god damn it Taking Chances gives me chills every time I hear her sing it… And she’s so cute when they tell her she got the lead!!!

If musical stuff is so frowned upon socially here, how are they expecting to get a full cast for Cabaret? Especially if NONE of the other glee kids are interested?

And there’s no funding for the arts but they have a whole ballet studio on school property…?

Sign #12 That Mr Schuester Is An Asshole: He just straight up tells Rachel that he’s the only person that likes her, which is wrong for so many reasons

He does have a point about Rachel needing to take a step back sometimes though. I hate that she’s so awful sometimes that I have to agree with Schuester.

He’s not HURTING you Rachel, he’s giving a chance to grow to somebody else!

Jenna did a beautiful job with this solo… Tina’s so cute too! I love her singing this sweet song with her goth aesthetic

This scene between Mr Schue and Tina was almost sweet BUT:

Sign #13 That Mr Schuester Is An Asshole: He did NOT need to touch Tina’s shoulders, or get that close, or whisper to comfort her.

Don’t take one for the team, Tina! Take one for YOURSELF!

I’ll let him hugging Finn slide because, wow, Finn’s breaking my heart right now…

However I will not let it slide that he’s seemingly taken him off campus for lunch…???? Dude, take him to your office. This is creepy as all hell even if he has good intentions…

“I got this at the school library. Did you know that you can just… Borrow books from there?” Protect him. Protect him at ALL costs. He was so genuinely inspired by watching Kurt make those goals that he went to a library for the first time in his LIFE oh my goodness

Oh god. The camera panning from a random father and his young son, over to Mr Schue looking at Finn? HE’S NOT YOUR SON MY GUY, HE IS YOUR PUPIL. PROFESSIONAL BOUNDARIES!!!

Terri and Will are both brushing their teeth with no toothpaste… Freaks…

Have I mentioned how much I adore those little background choir soundbites between scenes? They did so much for this show…

SHUT! UP! PUCK! Drink your fucking character development juice already!!!

Kurt just casually dropping in Sun Tzu’s Art of War… He just knows that. He’s prepared to just drop that in conversation. Son, why are you so ready for combat,

Also the way Kurt commands their attention? They can rag on him all they want but they all know he’s legit…

Look at all these doofuses in their football gear busting a move. Look at Kurt sat at the front just watching, judging, as he was born to do

MIKE! KILLING! IT! I love that they let us see a sneak peek of his moves… Serious HC that Kurt making the football team dance is the first time that Mike really got to show off his skills

Kurt shooing Mr Schue away like that gives me life!!! Sit down old man

“All right boys…” And they all look so concerned behind him lmao… “Oh– SNEAK ATTACK back to the ring…” Mike’s trying so hard to keep in time. I love him. OH and there’s Matt! Most valid glee club member simply because he never says anything.

“Comb through the hair… SLAP THE BUTT!” And they’re all trying so hard… 10/10

“I’m your best friend,” says Puck, to the boy he has been consistently fucking over for four (4) episodes, and presumably many years prior…

I really do hate Puck for the first part of this season but god damn does he have some lines. “’Sup, MILF?” “Well, CALL the Vatican! We got ourselves another ImMaCuLaTe CoNcEpTiOn!”

I remember the first time I heard the term “Lima Loser” but I didn’t know the show was set in a place called Lima (I would’ve been, like, 9) and I thought it was lime-a-loser. Like he was going to have limes thrown at him. And it was this big, serious threat…

How the FUCK did Terri get into Quinn’s car? Why is that never addressed? Like, ever? Quinn doesn’t even ASK?

Do this many people turn up to American high school sports events irl??? And do they really play the national anthem? That must get old

Why are all these football players 30… I’m so thirsty for realistic casting…

BURT’S HERE TO SEE HIS SON!!! We love a proud dad.

“I TOLD YOU! I TOLD YOU!!!” And now he’s doing high kicks. Kurt’s doing the absolute MOST.

I will never understand the rules of American football… And I mean NEVER.

“Ring on it on three” I love that it has a code name. And they were all too busy being dudebros to call it Single Ladies…

The one dude on the opposite team who starts boogying along is the real MVP

NEVERMIND. BURT BOPPING IN THE STANDS IS THE MVP!!!

“Can I pee first?” Legendary

Burt just going “he’s so little…” In the middle of the silent crowd…

MY BOY NEEDS HIS MUSIC!

BURT’S SO FUCKING PROUD I’M ACTUALLY CRYING??? YOU CAN HEAR HIM SHOUTING “THAT IS MY BOY!!! THAT IS MY SON!!!” THROUGH THE WHOLE CROWD!!!!

I feel like Puck seeing Finn and Quinn kiss and then the crowd going silent as he walks away is meant to make me feel… Bad for him…? But we’ve only ever seen him be mean to Quinn, really. You’ve got to earn those moments!

Ah… The skincare routine. He’s thriving.

Burt! Hummel! Is! Proud! Of! His! Son!

Burt… I’m pretty sure he assumed you wished his mother was alive. As opposed to her corpse being at the big game.

Oh boy here it comes…… Chris looks SO young here. So scared. So vulnerable. The way he slightly stutters… He nailed this scene. So much.

He’s gay!

He knows.

Do they make sensible heels in sizes for three year olds…? Asking for a dad

The raw EMOTION on Kurt’s face. It’s killing me.

This is the starting point… “I’m not in love with the idea, but I love you.” And it only gets better from there…

And he THANKS his SON. He’s sure. He’s so sure, Burt, and you are going to be so proud of him forever.

Finn gives Quinn that blanket his dad gave him when he was a baby… Did she give it back? I fucking hope so…

You tell him, Finn! Puck IS an asshole!

MIKE’S IN GLEE!!! SO IS MATT!!! And Puck’s here I guess, yay… He’s got a season or so of sucking to go before I can get excited about that.

“Regionals” here we come? My guy, let’s get through sectionals first…

Rachel’s big, cruel smile when she thinks she’s going to be handed Tina’s solo. Why would she presume that it’d just get handed to her??? I mean, I know why, but like, why… And she has the audacity to look like she’s been betrayed. Not even slightly, hon! You deserve nothing if not getting one solo is all it takes for you to quit!

This Sue’s corner genuinely gets me through some shit. “There’s not much of a difference between a stadium full of cheering fans and an angry crowd screaming abuse at you - they’re both just making a lot of noise. How you take it is up to you. Convince yourself they’re cheering for you. You do that, and someday, they will.” Hits me hard!

This one was longer. Primarily because of Burt, I will admit, but it can’t be helped. Perhaps it’s the best episode of season 1 because of Burt! Now that’s a break through…

#Glee #Glee Season 1 #Rosie watches things and then says things about the thing

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mercemerry · 5 years ago

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( maya hawke, trans female, she/her, fire emblem: three houses ) * &. i know it must be scary for you, leonie pinelli, after surviving the takeover. to turn into someone like leighanne “leigh” phillips, a twenty-five year-old pool lifeguard at the delmare & student at castle town university, right here in castle town. just remember that you are as honest as you are competitive, and to be wary, be safe, be true to who you are : neutral through and through. ( hywia )

hey howdy hey what’s UP my DEERS ( please don’t murk me ) i’m back with . . . hopefully my last character for a while ?? i don’t really have any plans for anyone else as of Yet - leonie is a character i,,, absolutely adore but never thought i’d pick up in the beginning but holy HELL i love her and i’m so excited to write her and i’m here to defend her from all slander. click for more abt her under the cut !!

BEFORE THE SNAP / L E O N I E P I N E L L I .

soooOOOOO. okay. in FE3H , Leonie is a student of the Golden Deer house/class and like a few of the other students , she’s a commoner instead of a noble. and right off the bat you find out one thing - that she’s an apprentice of Byleth’s father , Jeralt , and he’s her hero and she idolizes him.

this !! was from an instance where Jeralt stopped by her little hunting village and rescued the people of her village from poachers ; he basically taught Leonie a few things she knows , and she referred to herself as his apprentice since.

it was because of him that Leonie knew what she wanted to do - she wanted to be mercenary , especially one that could succeed the man she idolized.

so flash forward to years later at Garreg Mach’s Officers Academy - Leonie got in through her entire village basically paying for her to go , and for that she baaaasically accumulated a lot of debt from it. she’s really frugal with her money because of this. but turns out !! jeralt’s there , and he brings his kid , byleth , with him , and leonie sort of forms a one-sided rivalry with them since they’re pretty much the next-gen and Leonie wants to prove she’s on-par with them , if not better , because they’re pretty much Jeralt 2.0 in terms of fighting premise and that was Leonie’s goal.

eventually , though , this rivalry turns into Leonie being attached to Byleth through mutual grieving once ( spoiler alert ) Jeralt bites the dust , as well as Leonie making a promise to Jeralt that she’d watch over Byleth if anything happened to him - essentially , filling Jeralt’s role , but not in the exact way she expected.

a few cool things !! leonie is really skilled in hunting & fighting - she makes a very good cavalry unit with skills in lance & archery - i’m setting her up to be my bow knight on my current playthrough - and holy hell she has a LOT she can boast about. she’s just a really good unit and could probably level a battlefield by herself with minimal grinding in-game.

her personality is very honest & truthful , but blunt in a sense that more often than not , even if the situation doesn’t call for it , she WILL speak her mind and give brutal honesty if she believes in it. sometimes , she’ll immediately say what she’s thinking , even if it’s here jumping to conclusions or snapping impulsively. i... honestly really adore that about her , since it’s not very similar to me , but i kinda wish i had her bravery in that sense.

but hOLY HELL is she determined & hardworking and she’s actually a pretty cool person - she’s what i call a chaotic lawful because she’s,,,, a subtle kind of chaotic that still has her own code. she’s also REALLY GOOD at managing her time & money and kind of sees every single opportunity she has to train and work hard and yeah leonie is no fucking slouch and we gotta stan that.

she’s one of the gd members who regularly says ‘fuck’ but also ‘watch your fucking language’ if, like, lysithea or sb swears. the one who probably contributes to as many chaotic fuckshit shenanigans as she tries to fix.

anyways i’m gay and i am sOOOOO excited to write her !! i’m not exactly dECIDED yet in what path i want to pull her from out of either verdant wind or crimson flower , since i love leonie staying with the deer and can’t really see her wanting to ally with the people who killed her mentor ( twsitd , who worked with the empire briefly ) but also a timeline where she follows byleth and fulfills her promise to jeralt - who was also extremely suspicious of the church. it’s INTERESTING and i haven’t figured it out yet.

also she’s a chaotic bi bc i’m a chaotic bi that loves to project.

also okay i just also wanna say pls no. ‘leonie wanted to [REDACTED] ur dad’ jokes they kinda,,, sorta,,, make me rly uncomfortable esp since leonie sees jeralt as pm her mentor and Nothing More so if u could just refrain from tht i would b !! grateful.

AFTER THE SNAP / L E I G H P H I L L I P S .

okay soooOOOOOOO. trigger warnings here for parental death & murder.

so she survived the takeover , and remembers all of the events of her past life , but . . . leigh phillips did not have a good time here in castle town.

she grew up firstly with a family who wasn’t doing so well - they were happy , certainly , but they lived in a bad part of delaware & it wasn’t the best scenario because there were a lot of times leigh went without basic needs. but they made it , it was okay.

thought things really changed when leigh was a teenager , just shy of sixteen years old when her parents were murdered during a home invasion & she was the only survivor.

still a minor - scared & alone - she was taken in by a family friend and her husband who were perhaps waaaay more well-off than she was. this essentially was a tragic rags-to-riches story , where a girl who had nothing lost everything she had , but was taken in by a loving home that gave her everything she ever wanted.

and in castle town , that sorta-kinda was her reputation. she was coddled & cared for by her foster parents and didn’t really have to do anything to support herself - she got a job at the local rich people hotel as a lifeguard , but she didn’t need it. she had a full ride in college paid for by her foster family & anything she asked for.

THEN SHE WAKES UP.

wakes up as in , she wakes up with this new past & life in castle town and the thing is . . . leonie ?? isn’t a fan of living the rich kid life. isn’t a fan of not having to work. isn’t a fan of allowing herself to be coddled & protected & sheltered and basically have everything served to her on a silver platter.

she finds out how this happened and while she doesn’t condemn the people who took her in - because they are good people - she starts defying it in any other way. she starts working odd jobs at other places and saving any penny she gets. and this is weird , because everyone else in castle town knows her as this spoiled rich girl who would get all of the best things she wanted and now ?? she wants to live on her own ?? support herself ?? she’s shopping at walmart and the thrift store ??

hell yeah.

leigh’s whole mission is to pretty much break away from that reputation that was created for her in this fake life ; and that , in turn , basically has her trying to morph back into one more like home. she currently is living by herself , but is still employed at the delmare since , yeah , it’s a job , and any job will do. but she doesn’t really want to rely on her foster parents anymore for support , since they did a lot for her but she doesn’t like the idea of overstaying her welcome.

so it’s sorta-kinda a case of leigh is acting . . . VERY DIFFERENT from how she would prior to her realizing she’s actually leonie pinelli from fodlan and not someone else. so it’s gonna be a reALLY interesting dynamic to play and i’m so so SO excited for it.

anyways !! i’m gonna be heading to bed , but tomorrow i’ll be back for plotting & stuff and will do some replies/starters and maybe even some wcs to get the ball rolling for my girl !! love y’all xoxo

#castletown.intro #abt tag tbd #death tw #parental death tw #murder tw #if i missed anything lmk !!

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annashipper · 6 years ago

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JT Anon

Ok so this is going to be a wildly unpopular opinion that you will wholeheartedly disagree w Anna, but here goes

I kinda hope they phase BC out of the MCU. Im not one of these fans that wants him to fail or to vanish forever or will never see another project until he leaves sophie (i don’t think thats ever going to happen). I just don’t think he fits w the MCU anymore and he is kinda, to me, a bummer stain on an otherwise fun experience.

The actors in the MCU are literally the only actors I’ve ever taken a mild interest in outside of their movie roles. Meaning i won’t immediately change the channel if they are on late night, or I might flip through a mag if they are in there, or im actually interested in their thoughts on their char.

The actors in the MCU, for the most part, are super engaging. They engage the fan base in a really great way. Now granted, I get it, lots of that is coaching etc, I get that. However, the actors all engage w the material and the fanbase in a really great way. they have lovable personalities, they all seem humble and grateful and excited to be there. Even RDJ who plays on this kinda ego centric char he has is totally endearing and everyone gets it. They make the fan base feel like they are all a part of something, everyone is in it together, they genuinely want everyone to have a great time, they get how much these stories can mean to a lot of people.

Now im sure someone can pull up an anecdote here or there where MCU actors have not been their best selves, but for the most part, MCU actors make the fanbase feel loved and valued. MCU fans are not talked down to by them. Each actor has a unique and lovable personality that is engaging

BC sticks out like a sore thumb. He isn’t delivering DRS and MCU toys to hospitals, he doesn’t have social media, so he isn’t engaging w elements of the fanbase that does charity work. He doesn’t talk excitedly about DRS and MCU projects, he doesn’t comment on fan art and projects in a respectful way (ignoring the freakier ones). Now i know the dusted actors were not doing the rounds media wise, but still

Ben just comes off as someone who thinks he is above all that. All i see and think about when i think about BC and MCU fans is a guy who is just so sick of fans. Fans are all obsessed w him and won’t they go away. anyone who doesn’t worship him and dares to chat in a neg way about what he is putting out is a stalker, florals, they are all so tiring! poor, poor women who lost themselves when he married, your uteruses still have use w out him! he just seems like he doesn’t want to be there and is delusional about how much people care about him beyond gossip and riling each other up for fun

To me BC is in a totally different category from the other main MCU actors. BC is running around to the MET gala acting a fool, Ben is running around too busy trying to sell every single stitch of clothing on his body. ben is too busy branding and selling his family. ben is trying to wring every last red cent out of every move he makes.

And before anyone jumps down my throat w a long list of products MCU actors sell, I KNOW. its about the feel of it.

Ben these days comes off as a stuck up, toffy snob who doesn’t want to be there. Ben comes off as someone who has disdain for his fans, and while he def wants them to keep him and his wife in expensive vegan clothing and millionaire status, they need to just shut the fuck up and hand over the cash. Ben comes off as someone who is entitled to fame and attention, but on his terms. Ben comes off as someone desperate to merch and brand himself. Ben comes off as someone waaaay more concerned at the moment w selling every single article of clothing he and his wife has, every single life event he can get a sponsor for.

His image is a bummer ink stain on the MCU. He is like the stuck up boring cousin at the fun family reunion who spends his whole time pouting on his phone. the only time he engages is when he is the absolute centre of attention, and he has to be making cash money off of it or he isn’t interested. he is like that one person at school who won’t shut up about how many haters they have and how jealous everyone is of them, and how he just wants to do him, meanwhile no one is actually thinking about him like that.

Think of any MCU actor and you can think of cute, funny, humble, joyful, REAL feeling fan engagement.

W BC you just get a grown ass man whining, pouting, doesn’t want to be there, would rather be selling shoes and shirts and hats

as a fan i have absolutely no interest in him as an MCU actor. I don’t want to sit there and have my eyes roll out of my head while he either sells me some product or makes some delusional comment about how obsessed, OBSESSED EVERYONE is w him and his family and WHY WON’T THEY JUST LEEEAAAVE HIM AND HIS WIIIFE ALONE (ps please buy these shoes, please buy sophies dress, please check out this vendor that sponsored our wedding, please look at the menu of the person making vegan food for us, please buy the pictures of our kids please please please)

he has moved on from depressing to why don’t you just leave then? honestly?you would rather be throwing yourself all over a red carpet and selling clothing and jewellery and cars and vegan shoes and talking about how hard it is to be you because youre so famous, then go do that. go do period piece after period piece in between selling washing machines. i might even see one.

BC is like getting together w your fav cousins and your mom say you have to take the annoying one along too, and he just ruins your day by complaining about being tired all the time and talking about all the expensive shit his dad in another state buys him

just let us check out fan theory and make memes and talk shit and watch interviews in peace. STFU about the stuff you have for sale. STFU about how obsessed everyone is. go to the met gala, go arrange paps for attention. just GO live the fame life you clearly think you have. let people enjoy MCU shit w out you popping in every few months to remind us that youre here too and SO SO FAMOUS

its getting to kinda ruin MCU shit to me. If i know BC will be involved, im not interested.

I just don’t want to hear him whine, and i don’t want to have another fucking thing sold to me, and thats all he’s got

J got sooooo many haters T anon

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Well, you’re right in one regard JT. I wholeheartedly disagree with all of the above. Not because I’m contrary and a SkeptoNanny (which of course I am), but because you’re wrong :P

Ben didn’t do ANY promo for Endgame, so if we’re going to talk about him being a killjoy during promo for MCU projects, we have to revisit what he’s done during Doctor Strange and Infinity War promo.

And while, yes, he did make a faux pas (a pretty major one) with that incredibly stupid quote on his Vanity Fair cover interview where he thought it wise to casually mention his wife and child are not a PR stunt, other than that, his promo tour for Doctor Strange was pretty much the same as any other promo for a standalone superhero movie within the MCU.

And then there was Infinity War promo, which was more about promoting the MCU than it was about promoting himself. I would argue that he actually did a stellar job with that. He even brought quite a bit of DorkyBatch out to play:

I mean...

So yeah. If we’re going to have a serious conversation, we have to be very precise about the timing of what Ben says and does; especially when it comes to MCU promo.

Meanwhile, since you brought up charity projects linked to the MCU, let me remind you that Ben has been involved with those multiple times, through Omaze, and he even did it for Endgame (which he supposedly would have no part in and didn’t really have to do, because his character had already been dusted out of existence).

By the way, the shoes he’s selling are not always vegan. Not the ones he wore to the MET Gala (LINK) anyway :P

#JT anon

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b00bconnoisseur · 6 years ago

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60 questions for @not-my-brain

1. selfie.......Ugghhhh ok. Imma take one rn

Ok here u go (yes thats a bmth shirt)

2. what would you name your future kids?.....Ooo hmmm well when i was a kid i really liked the names disney, and mesiah. I didn't know at the time that mesiah was another name for god i think lol. I liked it cause of handlers mesiah. I still do. Ooo and maybe Tj too

3. do you miss anyone?......Yeah. My friends on Pinterest from a year ago. My friend lucas. Stan lee. Bob ross. My cousin who died from cancer some years ago. Snape. Sirius. Lupin. Tonks. Dobby. *continues to name every unfortunate death in hp*

4. what are you looking forward to?.......SE-YA next month!! Its the south eastern young adult festival at this college. You can have meet n greets with authors and alot of stuff its the besstttt

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?......DEFINATELY. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @sammchenry my friend lucas and @septembersbloom. ^^

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?..... What like...romantically? Or like a death? If romantically uhhh idk it took over a couple weeks but im ok now. Ive never had another relationship so idk. If death oof yeah idk maybe. Ig it depends on how much i knew them idk. Like when my nanny (great grandma) died i was sad for days (is that alot?)

7. what was your life like last year?.....Sucky af. Still is. But the highlights of my life last year was getting and making friends on tumblr, going to the tøp concert and going to warped tour, volunteering at the library, going to seya and meeting some of my favorite authors, reading, changing and improving my art, listening to all the bands i listen to now, getting into more fandoms, going to a friends house for the first time

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?.......Yes lol. Some years ago when i couldn't find smtn id be so annoyed and pissed id start crying. I dont now but still lol

9. who did you last see in person?.......Hm ig family doesn't count....? Wait do u mean a friend? If so uhh my friends rebekah, anika, and Judah at a TAB meeting at the library sometime last month.

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?......I think so? Like i mean I can hide whenever i get my....time of the month from my mom (talking abt stuff like that with her makes me uncomfortable) and i hid a breakup. And other p big stuff too. So imma say yeah

11. are you listening to music right now?........*pops on earbuds after reading this* yee im listening to bitch lasagna by pewdiepie xD (do i have the best spotify playlist or what?)

12. what is something you want right now?.......To hug @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye but SOMEONE has to live so far away

13. how do you feel right now?........Happy that my earbud still works cause they got washed in the wash yesterday....oops. Its not my fault. I told my dad to remind me to take it out of my jacket pocket before they threw it in but noooooo he forgot

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?.......Uhhhhh fuck idk it was probably from my lil 4 yr old bro sometime last week. Other than him (hes my favorite sibling) i dont let them hug me too much

15. personality description.......Nerdy. Fangirl. "Emo". Tomboy. Hotsause obsessed. Book lover. Music lover. Black. Blue. Harry potter. Introvert. Fall. Sports. Values friendship. Loyal. Uhhhh i cant think of much lol

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?.......*sigh* yes. Yes yes yes. Theres some things abt me, or my life really, that i havent told anyone on here or my irl friends that i sooooo want to so bad but i haven't cause i feel like they'd feel bad and pity me and i don't want that

17. opinion on insecurities........I dont really understand this one. Everyones insecure abt something. Is this askin like if i think its ok or not? I say its ok. Im insecure about literally everything about me. My face. My personality. My socialness. My art. What i do. What i say. Basically my whole body. The things i feel good abt are my books, music taste, and my friends (ily fuckers)

18. do you miss how things were a year ago?.........Hmm this time around a year ago....idk its sorta the same but all the stuff i mentioned abt my year from last year didn't happen yet so nah tho my life sucks rn its better than this time last year

19. have you ever been to New York?........Nooo but i want too soo baddd i wanna visit @septembersbloom !! Im coming for ya soon gramps *does the eye watching thing* my dads been to nyc before tho cause he does construction and he had a concrete job to do there. It was a 23 hr drive for him

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?........Uhhh idk!!! So hard! Maybe.....the whole thats the spirit album by bmth ;)

21. age and birthday?.....15 yrs of age and September 27th 2003 (whats yours brainy? I'll put it on my calendar)

22. description of crush......Its weird idk im not sure if its a genuine crush or not but uh....They like hp :).Thats all u get

23. fear(s).......Losing my best friend @dirtysocke and my other friends. Death. Failure. Momo chasing after me then killing me slowly keeping my eyes open to look her dead in the eyes while i die

24. height......5'6 call me short and I'll fuck u up with THIS *pulls out trusty potato peeler named now steve* dont test me boi

25. role model......Hhhhhhhh so many! But uh gosh one of them is @superraedizzle (youtuberrrr) and vexx and bob ross and da vinci and aaaaaaa so many

26. idol(s)......First person that immediately comes to mind is @sammchenry cause he's super cool and he's really nice and his art's reallyyy good (if u havent seen it w-w-what are u even doin with your life?) And he has a great sense of humor and *continues to ramble about why samms the best*

27. things i hate.......Dabs. Transphobes. Homophobic ppl. Basically any hate on the lgbtq+ community. Bullies. The ship starker. Umbridge. Snape haters

28. i’ll love you if….....U you'll eat pizza, draw, and rp harry potter with mee

29. favourite film(s)......Fantastic beasts. Every hp film. Twilight. The maze runner 1-2. The hunger games. Spiderman homecoming. Kingsman: secret service. Into the spideyverse tho i havent seen it yet

30. favourite tv show(s)......Inkmasterrrrr. B99. The mick. The middle. Uhhh idk mostly ink master xD

31. 3 random facts........Ive never had shrimp. I had a beta fish for over a year once. Im eating pizza crust rn

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?.......G i r l s. I have all girl friends irl and one boy. And on tumblr it seems like i just meet girls? Likei agree with @cristal-kyd1280 its like alot more gals then dudes here. But i do have some guy friends on here too. But mostly girls

33. something you want to learn.......TO DRAW ANATOMY DAMMIT

34. most embarrassing moment........Every moment of my lifes an embarrassing moment. Idk of i can pick a "most" embarrassing one. But one time i i sent my crush (now ex bf) a hey fuckface and like some hearts or whatever for an ask game that meant like "i have a crush on u" "youre adorable" etc and said Hewo but i did it all anonymously. But he confronted me askin if i sent it cause im the only person he knows that actually says hewo lol. Then later on i finally admitted i really liked him and well y'all know the story after i think. Unless you're new

35. favourite subject.......A R TTTT OFC

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?........meet my friends on tumblr. Get into mtsu (college i wanna go to) and study art. And go skydiving

37. favourite actor/actress........favorite actor uhhhhhh probably thomas brodie sangster or tom felton and my favorite actress? Hmmm idk maybe evanna lynch (luna lovegood)

38. favourite comedian(s).......probably kevin hart lol he's p funny

39. favourite sport(s)........basketballllllll and football

40. favourite memory........uhhhhh idk?? One oh my favorite memories was when we went to see tøp in concert

41. relationship status.....single as a pringle

42. favourite book(s)......harry potter and the order of the pheonix. Harry potter and the half blood prince. Simon vs the homo sapiens agenda. Divergent. Maze runner. Twilight. Fangirl. Fallen. Red queen

43. favourite song ever.......TOO HARD DONT MAKE ME CHOOSEEEEEE

44. age you get mistaken for.........16 and 17 sometimes lol

45. how you found out about your idol........i was watching someone on yt and superraedizzle always poped up in my feed and my mom turned on one of her vids cause she always saw her vids too now ive seen most of em i love her. Id heard of vexx but never watched him and i was watching a collab from anthony miller art and shrimpy and i checked out shrimpys channel and was lookin at comments and alot of ppl said his art is like vexxs so i checked out vexx. At first i was like eh ok. Now i cant click fast enough when he posts a vid. And i actually fpund out about bob ross from my grandpa on jan 20 2017 when trump was getting sworn in or whatever. We turned on pbs and my grampa told me to look and bob ross was on and i was IN. I loved it. I even started watching full episodes on YouTube of the joy of painting after that. Wonderful man. My first painting i ever did i think was when i followed one of his tutorials xD (i didnt know it was popular at the time)

46. what my last text message says......."ok your turn"

47. turn ons.....uhh nerds ig idk um book lovers, music lovers, art lovers, potterheads, idk and nice ppl

48. turn offs......jerks. Homophobia. Idk ig whatever i said in things i hate

49. where i want to be right now......uhhhh idk wait didn't i already answer this? Ok this ones different ig so uhh with my friend lucas

50. favourite picture of your idol.....oh shit...favorite? Idk xD i have a fave of vexx but not of rae or bob. But heres pics of them any way

51. starsign......a libraaaaa boiii

52. something i’m talented at......drawing and speed reading. Thats about it lol. Oh and procrastina

53. 5 things that make me happy.......ooooo art, my friends here on tumblr, books, harry potter, and music ^^

54. something thats worrying me at the moment.....if my friend thinks im being annoying

55. tumblr friends......hhhhh so manyyyyyy. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @chinesewaffles2 @kingantlion @queen-baelin @sammchenry @septembersbloom and more

56. favourite food(s)......green beans, pepperoni pizza, and vanilla madelines

57. favourite animal(s).......basically any reptile. Puppies. Cats. Any animal really but my #1 are snakes

58. description of my best friend.....well she's a tiny bean (5 feet) and she has dark hair, she wears glasses, she doesnt take shit, she's in love with Josh dun, she's awesome, funny, nice (YES youre nice jackie) and shes the best friend ive ever had. Oh. And she has a weird obsession with spaghetti

59. why i joined tumblr.......well i heard abt it on Pinterest over a year ago but didnt want it. Then @mrfastbass-deactivated20181231 on DeviantArt said he got tumblr so i made one then followed him and figured id just post art and that's it cause i thought tumblr was boring as hell when i first got it. Now im p much obsessed with it

60. ask me anything you want.......go ahead brainy shoot. Give me smtn good

#my face #mutual peeps #not-my-brain #asks #60 questions

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over-canon-watchh · 7 years ago

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Hi! I really love your writing ❤❤ who do you think the kids from south park would play as/who's their main?(main group, craig and those guys and it'd be awesome if you could also include some of the girls!)

Okay this is hands down my favourite request so far!! I mean South Park X Overwatch?! It’s a dream come true ❤️ (I beg, anyone who’s good at art, PLEASE draw this AU!)

Cartman: He’s a Roadhog main - this one is fairly obvious. All of that destruction and power? Plus, with Roadhog’s ability to heal himself, that’s definitely something Cartman would claim to do himself when playing RPGs with the other boys. He aspires to one day be just like Roadhog, blowing up things for money, however he also has Junkrats brains when it comes to thinking up schemes. He’s that guy who is beyond toxic - taking out every defeat on his team.

Stan: He’s a Reaper main because he’s an EdGy BoY. He once claimed that he “identified with Reyes on a spiritual level” and the boys haven’t let him live it down since. Aside from that, he’s probably has the highest ranking out of all the boys because he grinds all day. He once achieved a sextuple death blossom and wouldn’t shut up about it for three weeks.

Kyle: He’s a Hanzo main. I’m sorry, he just is. As much as I love him, there’s no one else that I can imagine him playing. He gets very angry very quickly when the team isn’t formed properly but he’ll also refuse to switch. Kills are extremely rare for him so when he once took out half the team with his ultimate, he proceeded to celebrate. He was immediately killed after that.

Kenny: He’s a Mercy main. 100%. It’s funny and ironic that he’s the healer but he totally plays her for her for the abilities… definitely not for the kill cams or anything ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). He’s one of those Mercy mains that screams about her nerfs for at least two weeks after Jeff Kaplan releases an update. Despite Cartman’s ability to heal himself, Kenny is always being shouted at by him to heal him. He saves up all his money just to buy loot boxes

Butters: He’s a Bastion main. They matches his personality and backstory quite well. For example, both have two sides of good and evil (Bastion’s tank mode and Butter’s Professor Chaos persona). Whenever he gets POTG, Cartman tends to let rip on him saying that he clearly didn’t deserve it when Cartman was no better than the latter. He picked an easy hero due to his inability to play as frequently as the other boys because of his parents.

Craig: He’s a Soldier: 76 main. It works out well with him and Stan being “rivals” and he just really likes the colour blue. The grumpy old dad persona is something that make Craig laugh, plus he’s a natural born leader. “If I had the ability to shoot triple helix rockets out of my gun, I would be sooooo happy.” He normally saves his healing ability for Tweek when he can zip over to him quickly.

Tweek: He’s a Tracer main. Her blinking ability is somewhat perfectly matched to his constant twitching. Plus: gay levels are off the charts. He likes her character design - both of them share the wild and spiky hair - and her backstory. When he’s in a good mood, he’ll poke fun at the other boys and gloat about his main’s skins and highlight intros and ask where theirs are In every single event.

Clyde: He’s a McCree main, without a doubt. Sure, the boy can’t aim for toffee, but you’d be foolish to deny that both of them have a charming and flirty aspect to them. Clyde tends to panic and he CONSTANTLY fans the hammer which really annoys his teammates. He’s nearly always on the payload so that’s one thing he’s frequently commended for. He lies about spending all his time on the game, you’ll normally find him practising against AI bots,

Token: He’s an Ana main. It fits perfectly with his role of Mom™ of the group, plus he’s a hell of a sniper. He’s constantly healing people on his team (even if they barely need it) and he tends to direct people on tactics. He has every golden weapon, even for the heroes he’s never even played before. There’s not much that annoys him about other players, however nothing makes him angrier than spawn campers.

Jimmy: He’s a Junkrat main. He’s constantly cracking jokes in a terrible Australian accent, but he can imitate Junkrat’s laugh pretty well. He definitely tea-bags every corpse he kills despite being 17. He’s probably using hacks 95% of the time. He’s that guy who will Solo-Ult you if you’ve done him dirty in a previous round. He’s never where he’s supposed to be - whether that be defending the point or escorting the payload.

Wendy: She’s a Zarya main. Pink hair? Amazing. Beauty standards? Unneeded. They’re a perfect match. She’s always campaigning for Zarya to gET SOME DECENT SKINS. She’s able to time her ultimates perfectly every single time, ending in a perfect kill streak. She’s EXTREMELY invested in the lore and the conspiracy theories. Wendy probably runs some sort of fan art blog for all of her personal Overwatch ships.

Bebe: She’s a D.Va main. She’s a damn good one too. She’d never admit it to anyone else though so she would pay under an anonymous gamer tag. She has every skin, spray, highlight intro, voice line and emote for D.Va because she cares so much about her heroes presentation. One time, she tried to speak to her other teammates but gained too much harassment when they found out she was a girl.

Heidi: She’s a Moira main. She’s probably the newest gamer out of everyone so it was fitting for her to choose the newest character. Her abilities to switch between healing and destruction is almost like Heidi and Heidi 2.0, but she would never admit that to herself. She will always heal Cartman even if he doesn’t need it. Her and Kyle’s friendship builds as they’re both not the greatest at the game so they share secrets and tactics.

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isroselalondebisexual · 7 years ago

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*hesitantly slides my trollswapped kids for you to analyze* Rose Peixes (I thought Rose with a horrorterror for a mom figure would be a neat concept), Dave Ampora, John Vantas, Jade Megido

Rose Peixes! Queen of Alternia, with a shot for the throne, a giant huge large big thousand-tentacled lusus for a mom. Gl'bgolyb is a lusus that makes demands of her charge, but we know from Feferi that she also does engage with her child frequently. Feferi spoke with her lusus, and learned about the encroaching destruction of the universe from her, and then was also able to speak with other horror terrors, which were more vast and horrifying than their emissary, and make friends with them AND gain a boon, so what I can glean from that is that Gl’bgolyb, despite having relatively high demand, was also pretty warm and loving as far as lususes go. Maybe not an authoritative parenting style all across, because she did make high demands and there WAS threat of real and devastating consequences, but not all parents are perfect. Anyway, Rose, raised with all the power in the world, and a lusus that loved her but required some pretty tasking stuff from her with threat of killing her friends if she didn’t cooperate, would result in Rose being a very, very driven person, I think. The throne is hers to seize, if she can fight for it, Alternia is hers to govern, and Rose is not someone to half-ass things. She would be privileged, as anyone from that station would be, and maybe not fully understand the social order on account of being very young still, plus she would be socialized with Alternia’s definition of “fairness,” but I think she would be more concerned with personal achievement than doing stuff like Trizza tbh. She’s relentless, driven, always clawing for bigger, better, harder, faster, someone with a ravenous pursuit of excellence, someone who is dissatisfied with herself unless her idea of perfection is achieved. Rose Peixes and Azula from Avatar would probably be pretty similar tbeh. She’s here to WIN. As Seer of Life, Rose would be the one to foresee the “onward march of positive progress.” That’s pulled straight from the extended zodiac page, btw. Hussie tells us that Life players are “concerned with the betterment of themselves and those around them,” so Rose is all about seeing the way things can be improved, interested in using her sight to propel things forward, make them better, refine them, take the future by the horns and drive it in the direction of progress. Yes, she’s spoiled and privileged, and yes, she needs to learn that her own definition of progress might not always match with other’s, but Rose likes to learn and is quick to adapt to new information, so I have full confidence that Rose Peixes, Seer of Life, would be a harbinger of that which is good.

Dave Ampora, hmmmm. Well, his attention seeking ways are going nowhere. Dave gets raised at the top of the spectrum, full royalty, with only one person in all the world who outranks him by blood, and he just so happens to be childhood best friends/moirails with her. Definitely still a hipster, definitely still takes photographs of weird deep-sea shit and scenic ocean views, absolutely looks up to and adores his ancestor a lot, creating an ideal image of him in his brain that he tries to pursue. Living in the wrecked ship of his ancestor instead of an actual hive is also a very hipster thing to do sooooo. Probably doesn’t like it when people tell him that ancestors aren’t real, or that his was lame. Rose is probably the one telling him how lame his ancestor was tbeh. Dave VERY likely wouldn’t want to help Rose with feeding Gl’bgolyb, that doesn’t strike me as something Dave would want to do, or that Rose would need help with, so he’s more focused on the emotional and caretaking elements of their moirallegiance. Primarily: Rose go the fuck to sleep it’s 3 in the afternoon the sun’s been up for hours I don’t care if you haven’t gotten it “just right” yet you’re never gonna get it “just right” because you’re a fucking perfectionist now get inside your goddamned ‘coon you absolute madwoman or so help me god I’ll swim down there and dunk you in that pile of slime myshellf! Needs constant validation for himself, which on one hand, that’s fine, on the other, he doesn’t ever want to confront when he’s been the one to make a mistake, or that he’s the one who’s overstepped, and that’s something he has to work on and work through, as someone born into immense wealth and power. As Knight of Hope, his task is as the group cheerleader, sort of. He’s the one protecting and sustaining everyone’s ability to look up, look forward, he’s the one that helps and allows Rose to pursue that better future, he’s the one giving John the emotional support and assurance that yes, John is valued and loved and definitely one of the group and not an outsider, Dave is the one to offer Jade support when she thinks the world is resting squarely on her own shoulders and help her keep her cheery disposition, even when life looks hard. He is an odd mix of deeply empathetic and loving, but also selfish at times, and too certain of his own rightness.

John Vantas has a screechy dad and mutant blood, which means he’s really, really good at laughing off conflict. If someone is mad at him, it doesn’t really touch him, which, on one hand, is good for conflict deescalation because it means he’s never sending off the signals that would lead to a back and forth of conflict getting worse and worse and worse. On the other, it can make having serious conversations with him an ABSOLUTE nightmare, because John isn’t taking them SERIOUSLY and he needs to LISTEN! Probably also has a very fatalistic sense of humor, as a way of coping with the fact that he could die at pretty much literally any second. “Whoops, almost got hit by a bus, ahaha, should’ve moved into that street a little faster ;B” *minor inconvenience happens* “Guess I’ll die.” It doesn’t help that Alternia is really violent and unsafe just, like, in general. Every goddamned troll has PTSD and I will stand by that. But humor is John’s coping mechanism, as well as just, he’s a dude who likes a laugh. He’s here for a good time, not a long time. Since he’s a mutant, he defines himself in society primarily based on who he’s friends with! With the Heiress and a fishprince as his good friends, plus his dear sweet darling burgundy moirail, that makes him… relatively well off, actually? He’s not sure how this is happening, but he does know that he loves Rose Dave and Jade so so so so much and ngl I think flush DaveJohn and pitch, playfully-competitive “i’m a bigger little shit than you are” JohnRose would be… excellent… I ship everything y’all I don’t know what you’re expecting of me. He puts a LOT of stock in his relationships with his friends, which unfortunately means that he gets very depressed if he’s left alone for too long. He’s an extrovert with a blood mutation that makes it so he can’t actually GO OUT and engage in activities for fear of revealing his blood color. How does he deal with it? More fatalistic humor. Hahaha… he’s so lonely… haha… At least Jade knows, that’s probably an immense comfort, and when Dave and Rose find out Dave’s immediate assurances that they still love him and this doesn’t change anything would do wonders for John’s outlook on life, as is Dave’s role. As Heir of Blood, I mentioned this already but John places a LOT of his identity in his bonds with others. In many ways, his quest is learning how to balance that with constructing a personal identity. He’s a lowblood, offspectrum mutant on Alternia, that doesn’t allow for a lot of individual value to be placed on himself, so that’s something he’s got to learn and grow away from, but at the same time, his friends are his anchors, what keeps him sane and happy and healthy, so it’s important too for him to grow alongside them, entwined with them, part of their group, part of the whole, part of the community that is no longer stacked unfairly against him. It’s a balance, but he’ll find it.

Jade Megido, raised by a kangaram, low socioeconomic status but magic powers that can break mountains. Nothing can possibly go wrong with this. She’s pretty relentlessly positive, angry at the society that labels her as “lesser” but with a sort of learned helplessness about her that makes her think there’s nothing truly to be done to fight back against it. So fuck the system altogether then! She’s here for a good time, not a long time, her lifespan is short and that’s provided she can even make it that long! So she’s gonna go PET BARKBEASTS and DO SCIENCE and EXPLORE THOSE COOL RUINS NEAR HER HIVE and visit her moirail who she loves dearly. She doesn’t have any of the funding necessary to get the parts and chemicals that she needs on her own, but luckily for her Dave is a people pleaser and vastly wealthy and also flush with her moirail so she can pester him for favors. She fears neither god nor death, pass her some fucking robot parts. A real “Fuckit” mentality, I think, but here to have a good time! Still deeply compassionate as a person, and still lying about how sucky her situation truly is, to her friends and also to herself. She likes to think of herself as just making the most of a bad situation but really she’s just avoiding confronting the fact that Alternia really, really SUCKS for warmbloods and there’s nothing she, one single person, can do in the face of the vastness of it all. As Witch of Time, she is confronted with her own corpse again and again and again, forcing her to look at the fact that life isn’t fair and doesn’t care about her, that she’s mortal, that death comes for them all. But as Witch, she is given the opportunity to CHANGE things. She’s handed the ability to make a difference, to grab the Game and make it do as she tells it to. And so she must first confront her own mortality, and then step forward and change it, she must learn confidence and drive. She cannot just ignore or lie about her problems, she must fix them, and that is where her growth lies. This has some immediate backlash of making Jade think, once she realizes that change lies in her hands, that she is responsible for everything, and that the tables have been flipped entirely and she stands alone as the sole savior of their group. But Rose is there with her sight, and Dave is there with encouragement and compassion, and John is always there to help her, listen to her, talk with her, and Jade is not alone in this. As always, their success lies in all of their strengths working together, and they are triumphant as a team.

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epersonae · 7 years ago

Link

This has been informally known as the “Mavis and Angus Fix Everything” fic in the WDA discord. It might also be called “epersonae yells at @magcretia about Another Beach Year” because that’s basically how it got started. It ended as the the longest thing I’ve written so far, even though it just covers a couple of days, and mostly a single evening.

Some almost equally long liner notes below the cut....

So this started with two things:

The very first line just sort of popped into my head when @magcretia was helping me work through some writer’s block about something else entirely. Originally, I thought I might use it for an Extreme Teen Adventures fic, so I just dropped it into my doc of random little ideas.

But then not very long after, she was in the discord talking about Another Beach Year and how she thought of something that could make it worse, and everyone (@blue-mood-blue, @emi--rose, and @weatheredlaw for sure) started piling on with more and more angst and I just kinda snapped? And was like: ANGUS AND MAVIS FIX EVERYTHING. [and now I’m trying to remember if I’d already written that first silly little scene where Merle is about to get lost in the woods? Anyway.] Because jeez, these grownups just keep getting deeper and deeper into their own drama, and what about the children?

Which, to start with: how old are Angus and Mavis? In one of several things that I just lifted entirely from Another Beach Year (which, btw, is excellent and you should be reading it), this is set approximately three years after story and song, which makes Angus about 13 or 14, and Mavis 14 or 15. So less children, and more early teens. For sure old enough to be picking up on all the drama going on with the adults around them, and to think maybe they can do something about it.

Speaking of grabbing ideas from other people:

First, this whole damn thing is basically a dialogue with Kath’s post-canon work. It’s perennially interesting to me how we’re working in more or less the same space, and because we focus on different aspects and have different narrative styles, we end up in slightly different places. This one has a lot of little details that I’ve more or less yoinked intact from Sizzled Out and For Old Time’s Sake; I might not even know what all of them are?!

Additionally, there was a long discussion in the WDA some months back about a Parent Trap AU with Angus and Fischer in the roles of the kids and Magnus and Lucretia in the roles of the parents. I think there’s a bit of that in here, tbqh, although I didn’t realize it until I was well underway.

Initially, I was thinking of this story as a stand-alone fic separate from my post-canon continuity, but as I went along it made sense to integrate bits of that, and at some point I realized it was set at a very specific point, which is to say right after Back in the Zone.

And in that continuity, I’m pretty certain that Lucretia and Taako don’t really reconcile until Magnus dies. So it couldn’t be “Angus and Mavis fix everything”, so what do they fix? Well: Polyblaster 4Lyfe plus all the Kraagnus I’ve been writing lately means clearing up things between Magnus and Taako, and baby!Magcretia means that it’s all directly related to Angus and his parentage. Which led to: Mavis persuades Angus to try to get his dads to be cool with each other again.

And oh yeah: writing about how much or how little these two young teenagers understand of the goddamn complicated web of relationships? Honestly was one of the most fun things I’ve gotten to write. (“Uncle Magnus likes Kravitz okay?” I die.) Angus saying “I don’t know why they have to be so complicated.” HOOBOY KID, us too. Plus for the hell of it I gave Mavis basically the WDA reaction to Magcretia: she thinks it’s adorable.

I also put a lot of thought into what the characters call each other, especially what the kids call the adults. Per canon, Mavis calls everyone Aunt and Uncle except for Davenport (WINK); I also have her interchangeably refer to Merle by his name, as “Dad”, and as “Pop”, just as they felt right. (This may or may not be true to canon; don’t @ me.) In a previous fic, I asked the crew what Angus would call Taako if Magnus were his father, and the consensus was “Mister Taako,” so I stuck to that here. Similarly, Merle is “Mister Merle” and Lup is “Miss Lup”, with still a lot of “sir” and “ma’am”. By this point, he generally consistently refers to Magnus as Dad and Lucretia as Mom, although there’s often extra ums and uhs around that, because he’s still feeling his way through it himself. Kravitz is just his name, nothing else.

At first I thought this fic was going to be spread out over a much longer stretch of time: I even had a bit of an idea for something way off in the future expanding on something that gets a couple of sentences in Remember. But it ended up coalescing into this single evening: Angus and Kravitz and Taako and Magnus going to Fantasy Olive Garden in an undetermined location while Mavis and Lucretia and Lup go to Chesney’s for karaoke night.

Sooooo, my favorite “Taako finally uses that FOG pass” fic is actually a 10000% nsfw Kraagnus, so that adds to the weird emotional whiplash in my own brain at least.

On top of that, when I first had the idea, I thought “jeez I’ve done this already, should I?”, with Angus trying to get Taako and Lucretia to talk: then I realized that could actually be part of the fic itself. Angus has a Way of Dealing with Conflict, and it involves making people talk over food. And man, this dialogue just kinda happened? (Thanks Kath for encouraging me to give Kravitz’s mic drop a little room around it. And bless Griffin for having Angus say “horseshit” in canon.)

I’m very proud of the chunk of dialogue that got this reaction, by the way:

As for the karaoke: this summer I discovered two things: Sweet Dreams by the Eurythmics is absolutely a Relic-hunting song, and it’s also absolutely my go-to karaoke song. So that was obviously Lucretia’s song. Then, as usual, I asked the gang for opinions. The consensus was that Mavis was going to be amazing at karaoke, and when Kath mentioned 4 Non Blondes What’s Up as being her song, I went to have a listen. (Dang that song was everywhere when I was 18.) And it just fit. When blue mentioned singing “a song about killing a man”, I had to ask, and when that turned out to be Goodbye Earl, we all started joking about Goodbye Merle, and yup, absolutely a duet of Mavis and Lup to give Merle a heart attack. Kath also suggested Alone by Heart, and since I know I want to write a Lupcretia follow-up, that fit nicely as well. Bonus song: I love the Bond movie Goldeneye, and Minnie Driver mangling the hell out of Stand By Your Man seemed like a nice touch for some bad karaoke.

Have a playlist.

It was nice, really, to just let the gals have fun while the guys worked out their issues. Which turns out to be “Taako on the art of apologizing without apologizing” after Kravitz cuts through all the equivocating and bullshit.

I took a couple of stabs at an ending before it really solidified, and AGAIN, suggestion from Kath for both Angus and Mavis to have some separate resolution with an adult, who I realized had to be Merle for both. He’s very Dad in this, and in my fic he’s also tried to do what they want to do and has a lot of sympathy.

I actually wrote the scene with the kids on the roof before either of the two scenes right before it, but even with the additional conversations it didn’t feel like a good resolution, whereas ending with Merle somehow did. (Catch me adding a tiny glimpse of Davenchurch!) I know it’s not “all better”, but I feel like I’m moving towards that “happy ending they all deserve” with this one, which is something I really want to do.

#taz balance #taz fic #my fic #jfc this is all so long

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illnessandinjury · 8 years ago

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Multiples of 2 for the ask meme thing~

How can I win your heart?Are you happy with where you live?Thank you for the ask, sweetie!

2.)Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone?

I get good morning texts from both my boyfriend and my girlfriend!

4.)Do you find it easy to trust others?

For some reason - yes. I kinda hate it tbh, but I will overshare my whole life story with literally anyone. There are some very few things, though, that only the closest people to me know.

6.)You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?

So when I drink, I only drink with a special select few people. So either my three very close friends whom I drink with, my mother, or either or my partners.

8.) Are you close with your dad?

Sadly not! I did used to be very close with him until he got remarried to a literal Satan incarnate. Now, when I text my dad, I can almost guarantee she’s the one replying and then deleting the messages before my dad can see them - sooooo

10.) What are you listening to?

Right now - I’m just listening to the storm going on outside

12.)Do you like hickeys?

Not really? I’m asexual, so it’s more-so like, “Why are you sucking on my skin, stop it.”

14.)Is there someone who continuously lets you down?

My brothers :’^)

16.)Do you always answer your texts?

I do! I always feel bad if I don’t respond hahaha.

18.)When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?

I just had a conversation with my best friend from highschool about my possible engagement!

20.) What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

Honestly, I don’t know. I usually try and imagine illness/injury fanfiction in my bed before heading off to sleep?? So probably that??

22.)Do you believe what goes around comes around?

I do, actually! Karma plays a big role in the Wiccan faith!

24.) Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?

Nope! I’m a burden barer and I don’t let go hahaha

26.)What colour is the shirt you are wearing?

Pastel Pink and White!

28.)Is anyone ignoring you right now?

Nope!

30.)Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?

The last person I kissed was my boyfriend - so if it was my girlfriend kissing him, I wouldn’t care no! Some random girl on the street though? I might me a little miffed haha.

32.) Are you mad at anyone?

Mmm, not really, no!

34.)How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?

It was my boyfriend, as mentioned above, and he will be 22!

36.) Do you have any summer plans yet?

OKAY SO YES I DO. In August (counts as Summer, shut up, let me have this moment) I am going to be quitting my shitty factory job, then my girlfriend is flying over from NORTHERN IRELAND to shitty ol’ OHIO. All three of us are going to go on my family vacation to Florida for a week, and THEN after she goes back home - I’ll be going to college!

38.) Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?

I mean - there are things that I probably won’t tell them ever tbh. I DID however tell them my kink when I was very drunk once and they were like “Oh, that’s interesting.”

40.)Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

My ex :’^) I regret that whole relationship tbh.

42.)Are you available?

Like what kind of available? To get pasta? CERTAINLY. To date? No - I’m very happy taken by the two loves of my life

44.) If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?

Okay, so I’ve had A LOT of piercings, but the only one I’ve kept was my septum. I miss my Medusa piercing a lot - so I’d say if I had the chance I would get that done again!

46.) Do you regret anything?

ONLY EVERYTHING LEADING UP TO BEING 18 YEARS OLD, MY FRIEND

48.) Did you ever lose a best friend?

So I had a best friend in highschool, and she left when we were going into our Sophomore year and then when I heard back from her only about three years later - she was married, had two kids, and lived in Germany.

50.) Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?

The only person I’m not pursuing that I like are fictional characters.

52.) Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?

Everyday! He’s actually going to be coming home in a couple hours!

54.) Did you get any compliments today?

I actually got a lot at work today, because I dyed my hair and cut my bangs. My TL thought I was a new associate so there’s that hahah. Also, my girlfriend showers me with compliments on the HOUR soooo - yes! I did! And if you, reading this, didn’t??? WELL GUESS WHAT YOU LOOK GREAT AND I LOVE YOU.

56.) Do you own anything from other countries?

I mean, I’ve orders some anime figures from Japan - does that count? Hahhaha. I would also say a keychain my girlfriend sent me of her own art - and the little card she sent with it!

58.)Where have you lived most of your life?

I have lived out the entirety of my life in Ohio.

60.) Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?

Nope!

62.) Who do you text the most?

Probably my girlfriend - I would say she ties with my boyfriend, but not really considering he and I live together, and she lives across the ocean hahaha.

64.) What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?

Well, my for my boyfriend? I am his first and only girlfriend - so um.. nothing. And my girlfriend - I guess I’m just too amazing -flexes arm muscles-

66.)Is the last person you kissed younger than you?

Nope! Older by 2 years!

68.)Are you happy with where you live?

NOPE. I am moving into a new house in a couple weeks, which will be super nice because it’s gorgeous! BUT I still hate Ohio, and honestly would just like to move out of the United States.

70.)Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships?

Lololololo. If my previous answers didn’t answer this already, I don’t know what will hahah. I am in a polyamorous relationship - so DOWN WITH THE MONOGAMY. Just kidding - monogamy isn’t bad!

72.)What do you most like about making out?

I don’t like it, hahah. Too much saliva and messy-ness. I like continuous kisses though! Just no more than like.. five.

74.) When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other?

Hmmm, I’d say it’s about 50/50 tbh!

76.) Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?

Technically, my girlfriend over text! But then my boyfriend came to check on me, woke me up, and told me goodnight?? SO LIKE?? BOTH???

78.) Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?

Buddy... I am a virgin hahaha.

80.) Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?

Ehhhh?? Probably not?? I don’t like kids hahaha.

82.)Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush?

IF I HAVE A CRUSH ON SOMEONE - LITERALLY EVERYONE AROUND ME IS GOING TO KNOW. I will stand up like a preacher at church and be like “you see this cute motherfucker? i have a crush on them.”

84.) Last time you slow danced with someone?

Uhhh - I think I slow danced with my boyfriend one morning while making breakfast like a month or so ago?? But like at a DANCE? Probably my senior prom hahaha.

86.) How can I win your heart?

Be a cat.

88.) What were you doing last night at 12 AM?

SLEEPING because I wake up each morning at 5:30am.

90.)Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication?

This is a fucking weirdly specific question??? But no, I haven’t.

92.) Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly?

So I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 4 years, and then my girlfriend came along and I’m like “CAN I DATE HER PLEASE” and my boyfriend was like “sure go for it” and I was like “YEEEEE” but I wouldn’t date more than two people at a time tbh.

94.) Name four things that you wish you had!

A lot of fucking money, a job I loved, a house right on the beach, and endless cookie dough.

96.)Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day?

NOPE BUT I’M ABOUT TO IN AUGUST WHEN MY GIRLFRIEND VISITS. KISSES FOR BOTH MY PARTNERS ALL THE TIME. ALL DAY - EVERY DAY.

98.)Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr?

I met my girlfriend on tumblr, hahaha. THIS tumblr, actually. BROUGHT TOGETHER BY KINK

100.)Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?

My girlfriend, hahaha. I could see myself going out on a friendly pizza date with a ton of you other kinksters though.

102.) Are you too shy to ask someone out?

At the moment? No. In general - yes!

104.)Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?

YES. I LIVE FOR PET NAMES TBH.

106.)Do you flirt a lot?

To the people I’m already dating - yes. I am a flirt master with them hahaha - or at least I think I am. I’m probably really bad at it hahahah.

108.)Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2012?

Nope!

110.) If you could kiss anyone who would it be?

Time to get gay - I can’t wait to kiss my girlfriend tbh??? Like, she lives so far away and I JUST WANNA SMOOCH HER.

112.) Does someone like you currently?

I mean, geez - I hope both my partners like me hahaha. Also, there is this forklift driver at work who is SUPER into me.

114.)Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

I GET IN RELATIONSHIPS FOR THE LONG RUN - LIKE PUT A RING ON ME

116.)Are you happier single or in a relationship?

I am most definitely happier in a relationship tbh. I am a super dependent person due to my history - and I really, REALLY hate being alone!

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