#he probably goes by Frank now

[kay9leo]

Boggart

Because at 14, everything feels so long and permanent. Especially when the future is uncertain.

Honestly this was inspired by this post asking about your MC's boggart. I always figure that my MC's would fall into a more similar vein like Hermione where her boggart represents more of a symbol/idea.

When read up on reddit on Hermione's boggart was Professor McGonagall, someone pointed out saying that it's more of a symbolic thing when you look into it under a deeper light. With Professor McGonagall saying she failed all her classes, Hermione could get expelled from Hogwarts and get her wand snap. Essentially denying her from the wizarding world.

Since Hermione -a muggleborn witch- wants to belong in the wizarding world (when the muggle world rejected her), she is trying to prove that she deserve to belong in the wizarding world through her grades and by being at the top of her class. Hermione failing her classes could risk her getting kicked out and getting her wand snap. The McGonagall boggart failing her is symbolic of her true fear - belonging no where.

While Hermione a girl trying to belong somewhere and doesn't want to be kicked out, Iñaki is a girl who's afraid that she'll never go back home.

What's a more permanent way of saying you aren't returning to your home country by getting a passport (symbolizing that you got naturalized) of your adopted country? More about Iñaki "MC" Martinez Cariaga

[foldingfittedsheets]

When deciding who to work for there is a sliding scale of employers that goes from lil mom and pop shops up to corporate monoliths. I have worked at both ends of the spectrum and I can pretty definitively say that tiny businesses are hands down the most insane employers.

The sweet spot is a place that has like 10-20 stores; that’s the best possible work environment. They’ll be polished enough to have protocols that make work structured, but not so bogged down with bureaucracy that nothing can ever get done.

This story is not from that sweet spot. This story is from my time working at Oil and Vinegar. Now, like many little franchise stores, the idea was solid. There was on tap imported olive oil and vinegar and it was really delicious. Top shelf. Unfortunately, each location was like the Wild West because owners varied wildly.

My owner was the human embodiment of Mr. Krabbs. His eyes were just constant dollar signs. Throughout my training he informed me of the price of every single piece of equipment I touched and how much it cost to replace it.

He had cameras set up to watch us, and an app on his phone to access the live feed. He’d call us to ask what we were doing when he’d just checked a camera to make sure we were being honest.

Now, the trouble was he had two locations. His location further south did amazing. It was way more centrally located and got three times the foot traffic. The one I worked in was in the snottiest mall possible in Arizona and consequently the rent was through the roof.

It was not going well for my store. We didn’t get as much traffic, so there was only so much I could do in a day. I could dust, sweep, and wait for customers. I read a lot and was frank when he called to interrogate me. I always asked for additional tasks but he never had any. What could I do to prop up a failing business?

But this man was convinced there was some Secret Reason that the store I was in was doing worse. He crunched numbers, looked at staff, and eventually hit upon the most insane possible solution.

We used too much toilet paper.

We were probably stealing toilet paper! Bleeding him dry one single ply square at a time! How dare we need to use the bathroom?! His south location used half as much toilet paper as we did, we must be thieving little monsters!!!!

Friends. The south location was populated entirely by men. My location had three people on staff who had to sit to pee. It was so blindly transparently the source of the discrepancy but this man was convinced we were making off with toilet paper to bankrupt him.

So he implemented what he believed to be an entirely reasonable response to this base treachery. We were allowed to have one roll of toilet paper. At any given time, one roll was permitted to us. This was so transparently unhinged that we protested but he insisted. If we were low on toilet paper we needed to call him to drop off a roll that he brought from his home. Smiling jovially, he assured us he lived so close by that it would be no problem!

When we needed to call him often for more he started tearing his hair out. What were we using toilet paper for?! Why wasn’t his genius plan to stop our scandalous waste working??!

Finally, the manager, the only man on staff had to pull the owner aside and be like, “Look, man, their bladders are smaller. They need to wipe every time they pee. They need to pee even more on their period. Is this really the hill you want to die on?”

Yes. It was. The manager was fired unrelated reasons and denounced as a traitor. The toilet paper ration lasted until I quit and probably until the store closed six months later.

[haetrack]

your fate, my karma

jung jaehyun x fem!reader

wc: 11.7k

synopsis: jaehyun realizes he’s in love with you. it’s fucked, especially because he rejected you once before. he doesn’t want to ruin what he has with you. but he can’t help it, it’s like he was made to see and touch you. he doesn’t know how much longer he can hold in his secret.

warnings: angst, little fluff, friends with benefits, pining, one sided love, confession, argument, smut (MDNI), desperate jaehyun, unprotected sex (pulling out), possessiveness and jealousy, dialogue heavy at some parts

heavily inspired by somethin’ stupid - frank sinatra

part three to the how it all goes series!

you're laid back onto his bed, heavy breaths fanned across your face. on top of you is jaehyun, cheeks dusted with pink as his fingers are still move inside of you. “stop already,” you huff out a laugh, “i might die if you make me cum one more time.”

he chuckles at your words and slowly pulls his fingers out of you, sucking obscenely on them just to annoy you. it works, and you cover your eyes to get the image out of your head. you don’t offer to help him out, and he doesn’t ask for any favors.

he’s not really sure how his friendship with you got to this point. if he could put it simply, you told him that you had feelings for him, asking if he felt the same way. he said that he wasn’t ready for a relationship, that he wasn’t ready to be so vulnerable in front of another person. he still wanted to be friends with you. 

he remembers seeing sadness flash through your eyes, but you just smiled at him and accepted the answer that you got. in a way, jaehyun wished he could like you back, he hated the way he hurt you, but he just wasn’t ready. you were wary around him, trying to hide the hurt that he caused you. he couldn’t bear to see it, and hated how much you were hiding from him.

which is how he finds you next to him, curled up in his bed after he’s made you cum. he knows it probably wasn’t the best idea to propose, but he didn’t know how else he could keep you close. when he explains it to himself in his head, it sounds shitty, makes him feel a little fucked up. he tries to justify it, but really, all of this is a temporary fix to keep you close to him.

despite all the grey areas in his friendship with you, he’s certain about one thing: he really does like having you around. he’s chalked it up to his feelings just being from how long he’s known you, but he knows that there’s something else he doesn’t want to admit. because one, it’s fucked. two, he’s rejected you. three, he can’t like you.

he can’t like like you. he doesn’t even want to imagine thinking about the other word, but it plays at the back of his head sometimes. he hears it when you’re both out at a bar together, watching you drunkenly cling to his side. he hears it when you’re at his apartment after work. he hears it when your eyes look up at his when you drop to your knees.

he can hear it even now as you lay next to him, curled up into his side as your breaths even out. it doesn’t feel weird that he can feel your naked body against his, his best friend comfortably laid up next to him. is it so wrong of him to want this? you became more comfortable around him again after he had sex with you. he knows it’s just a temporary solution.

he can feel your breaths across his chest, your face nuzzling closer to him. he could move you away, could create a clearer boundary between the two of you. he feels a little selfish when he lets you stay there, deciding to wrap an arm around your shoulders as he pushes you closer. it’s not fair to either of you, he’s not your boyfriend, he shouldn’t be this close to you. 

it’s quiet in his room, save for the sound of cars driving down the road and the occasional huff you let out in your sleep. he isn’t tired at all, too lost in his thoughts as he stares up at the ceiling, the warmth of your body taking up all his thoughts. if he could, he would go back in time and stop you from confessing. he would’ve done it himself in the future, he just needed a little more time.

he can’t blame you though. it’s his fault for rejecting you, it’s his fault for thinking that he could make something happen out of this. there’s a small part of his heart that believes that you could like him again. you wouldn’t come back to him for sex every night, right? but the more realistic part of him knows that it could mean anything.

which is why he can’t stop you coming to him when you’re needy. it’s not even just those times, but he doesn’t think he could ever willingly cut you off. he likes spending time with you, and above everything else, you’re his friend.

he just can’t help but wish it could be a little more than that.

you always ask jaehyun to come over if he has the time.

as you both have grown older, it feels like you both have lost more and more time. when you were both college students, it was easy to skip a few classes and go to parties each night. but now as adults, it’s hard to find time for each other. which is why you ask him to go do mundane tasks with you, like buying groceries or trying on clothes.

today it’s going over to eat with him.

before he rejected you, it felt special to be invited to do these kinds of things with him. out of all the people he could’ve asked, he chose you. it didn’t take long for you to realize that, no, jaehyun asking you to spend time with him meant nothing but him being friendly. it’s weird looking back at how much you wanted jaehyun to like you more than a friend. 

as you make your way to his apartment, you realize how much time you spent just wishing for something to happen between you two. you wonder if it was something that was ever supposed to happen between you, or maybe if the timing just wasn’t right. you used to find yourself thinking about the what ifs after he had freshly rejected you. but now, you try to focus on what you have.

he’s just your friend, and you’re close to accepting that it’ll probably never be more than that. 

when you make it to his apartment, you don’t see him right away. you call out his name, hearing his voice from his kitchen. when you head over, you’re expecting a nice meal laid out for the two of you to eat. instead, you’re greeted by jaehyun standing by the stove, a stupid smile on his face as he greets you.

“so, you invite me over to come and eat.”

he nods, smile growing wider, “yes.”

“but i’m not seeing any food.”

“that’s because you’re gonna help me.”

you stare at him. he starts moving towards you, one of his arms wrapping around your shoulder, pulling you into his side. he starts dragging you towards where he was standing. you start whining, “you don’t need my help. you’re a whole grown man who can cook whatever he wants.”

he laughs, “but i need you to be my other chef… what are they called?”

you roll your eyes, “a sous chef?”

“exactly,” he points at you, as if you just solidified his argument, “what if i forget something and i need your help?”

you pat his shoulder, “then you call me while i sit over on the couch.”

he’s about to give up, but he swears there’s a certain look in your eyes that ask him to keep going. that’s how it always feels with you, a certain push-and-pull that you both can’t let go of. your fingers twitch against his shoulder, almost giving you away. he moves to hold your hand, “how about you at least watch me on the side. i just wanna talk to you.”

you almost want to point out his pouty tone, want to laugh at how there’s a frown on his face. but you can’t. he looks a little too sincere, and you don’t want to think too hard about the feelings he doesn’t have for you. you sigh, eventually giving into his words. it’s always like this, jaehyun acting like he can’t go on without you. that’s what got you here in the first place.

he smiles when you approach him, so close that his arm is touching yours. it doesn’t matter how long or how many times he’s had sex with you, to have you close to him like this makes his heart soar. 

it’s like this for the whole time you both cook. your hands lightly grazing his, the sweet smile you show him when he does good, the laugh you let out when he messes up. you take over some parts for him without him asking you to. he can’t help let his mind wander, thinking this is how it would be all the time if you two were dating.

he wouldn’t have to beg you to do something with him, you would do it on your own accord. he wouldn’t have to hold back how much he wants to kiss you, he could press as many kisses on your cheeks or lips. he could stand behind you, wrapping his arms around you as you forcibly kick him off of cooking duty.

instead, he’s standing in front of the food he’s making, probably overcooking it as you point and laugh at him. you even take out your phone to take a picture of him, laughing as you fiddle with your phone. he swats at you, grumbling, “if you posted that on instagram, i am definitely blocking you.”

“you know me so well. i tagged you and everything.”

he chooses not to respond, taking out plates from his cabinet for the both of you. he can see you standing next to him, waiting to plate your food. he quickly decides to plate it for you, trying to hide his pink cheeks as he pushes the plate towards you. when he’s plating his own, you speak up, “wow, what a gentleman!” he can hear the teasing tone you use, “you’re really setting the bar for all men, aren’t you, jaehyun?”

he decides to tease you back, “just trying to show you how much nicer i am than you are. you should post this on instagram, too.”

“nope, letting all my followers know how mean and horrible of a cook you are. i’m ruining your chances of getting with someone.”

he shakes his head in amusement, moving to one of the seats on his small dining table. you follow, sitting right across from him. he messes with his phone a bit before you can hear that it’s connected to his speakers. an unfamiliar tune starts playing as you watch jaehyun’s head bob along to the song. 

this is how it always is, eating together, listening to his annoyingly good music taste, and enjoying each other’s presence. the food he cooked is surprisingly good, but you try to denounce it because you did help him along the way. it’s quiet between the two of you, nothing really too important to talk about.

jaehyun notices your fingers tapping along the table to the beat of the song. he smiles, “do you like it? the song?”

you pretend to think about it, “hm... well, it’s good.”

“you’re not gonna secretly shazam it under the table like last time?”

“that was literally a one time thing,” you huff, “i’ll just go and find someone with the exact same music taste as you.”

he smiles to himself, “you know there’s no one else like me.”

you think about his words for a bit. he probably didn’t mean for them to have a double meaning, but you can’t help but find one. you wonder if you’ll ever be able to find someone who could’ve made you as happy as jaehyun does. you wonder if you do ever find someone, if you’d be able to forget jaehyun.

you feel like you’ve become so intertwined in his life that everything might lead back to him.

you eventually nod along to his words, “yeah, there’s no one else like you.”

“you’re kinda an ass for not picking her up yourself.”

jaehyun huffs at johnny’s words. it’s not that he didn’t want to, but you had assured him that you would make it on time. when he brought up your safety, you said that it was taken care of already. jaehyun couldn’t help but wonder who or what could possibly be more safe than him, but he didn’t want to argue. 

but now that you’re a little late, he can’t stop himself from worrying. johnny makes it worse, tearing into him, teasing him with every word. jaehyun hasn’t told him about his surfacing feelings for you, but johnny is notoriously nosy, probably knowing the exact day jaehyun thought that he started liking you. 

johnny takes one more jab at him, “she would’ve liked you more if you’d been the one who brought her.”

jaehyun’s shoulder bumps into johnny’s, “she already does like me a lot, so there’s no need for all of that.”

johnny shrugs, letting out an if you say so as he sips on his drink. as much as jaehyun wants to deny it, he really wishes he could’ve at least given you a ride. he would’ve immediately ditched johnny if you asked, would’ve been right outside your doorstep as soon as you said you were ready. he wants to tell himself that that’s just what friends do, but there’s something he doesn’t want to admit.

his hands move to pull out his phone, scrolling through your messages from the past hours. he knows he’s made a mistake as soon as he feels johnny’s eyes looking at his screen from over his shoulder. jaehyun makes a jokingly shocked face at johnny to try to distract him, but johnny’s face mirrors his own. 

johnny’s about to say something with a teasing smile on his face and jaehyun’s ready to stop him. instead, a ding comes from his phone, calling their attention. it’s a text from you, letting jaehyun know that you’re outside. he sends a text to you, his eyes moving to the entrance as he waits for you to walk in.

and there you are.

your eyes scan the room, looking for both him and johnny. jaehyun can feel his cheeks heat up at the sight of you, your face illuminated by the warm lights of the bar. he thinks you look pretty all the time, but now that he’s seeing you like this, he wants to keep it in his memory forever.

you quickly spot them, your face brightening up with a smile as you make your way towards them. you greet the two of them, johnny easily bringing you into a hug. when you turn to jaehyun, you expect the same, but his eyes stay on you for a moment too long. he notices your teasing smile, quickly clearing his throat before wrapping his arms around you.

johnny starts, “always so fashionably late.”

you laugh, “if i don’t come, who else is gonna be the funniest and sexiest person in our friend group?”

johnny moves to tuck an invisible strand of hair behind his ear, “i was holding that position just fine before you came.”

you slap his shoulder, a fit of laughter taking over you. jaehyun watches the two of you, quietly laughing at the side. he likes the dynamic the three of you have, always mentally thanking johnny for introducing you to him. he’d endure all of johnny’s teasing for years if it meant to have you laughing at his side.

it stays like this for a while. the three of you drinking together, laughing when johnny tries dragging you closer to the middle of the room to dance. jaehyun can feel his cheeks get hotter, pink from the alcohol and the not-so-visible adoration he holds for you. he tries to quiet his feelings, but when you lean into his side, your warm body pressing against his, he figures he can give up the act a little.

it’s at times like these where jaehyun realizes that he can see the you from before the rejection. it’s a bit selfish for him crave this side of you, the one where you don’t care how much you touch him or how you continue talking into his ear all night. he thinks that if you were both dating, he could lean over and press a kiss to your cheek, watching as you nuzzle into his side.

for now, all he can do is wrap his arm around yours as you both sway side to side. johnny went off to get another drink, promising to be back quickly. jaehyun has this little time to have you all to himself, listening to the loud chattering around him and the bass of the music loud in his ears. your eyes are closed, humming along to the song.

jaehyun could easily whisper into your ear about his feelings. you probably wouldn’t remember either way, but he knows it’s not right. it’s not like he’d want to do it this way, wanting to tell you honestly. but there’s a growing part inside his brain that’s begging him to do something about it. he has you so close now, so why can’t just say that he likes you?

the thoughts dissipate when johnny comes back, smile on his face with three more drinks in hand. johnny quickly notices how your arm is intertwined with jaehyun’s, and jaehyun can physically see the moment johnny comes up with a plan. jaehyun doesn’t bother moving from his spot, though, willing to sacrifice his humility just to have you by his side.

as if jaehyun wasn’t having thoughts of kissing or dating you, the conversation turns back to normal. the three of you chatting, exchanging work gossip and taking drinks from your cups. it’s like every night this happens, it’s a regular routine of talking and him having to fight back his more than friendly thoughts of his friend. 

except this time, while johnny’s explaining how he thinks his boss might be having an affair, you cut him off. johnny jokingly scoffs, turning to where you’re looking at. you both squeal, johnny’s hands finding your shoulders, shaking them back and forth. you gasp, “that’s him, right?”

johnny matches your tone, “totally him! i could recognize him from anywhere!”

raising an eyebrow in your direction, jaehyun asks, “and who exactly are we talking about?”

you turn back at him, “that’s jungwoo, someone we knew from college!”

the name sounds familiar to jaehyun. there’s probably been a few times you talked about him during one semester. he’s not sure which one it could be, but there’s a memory of a faint smile on your face while talking about him. it sets a weird feeling in jaehyun’s stomach, and he realizes you look a little too excited at the sight of jungwoo.

jaehyun’s arm is still looped around yours, a small frown on his face, “does everyone and their moms know jungwoo now?”

“he was funny in class and he bought me coffee once,” johnny hums.

you join in, “he is definitely funny and he did good when we worked on a project together.”

jaehyun pointedly glares at johnny when he speaks, but when you speak, he just holds you closer to him. he can see how johnny watches him, being reminded of how he looked like he was planning something earlier. jaehyun sees it now, johnny’s face darkening before he speaks, turning to speak to you, “i think you should go talk to him.”

jaehyun sends a pointed glare at him before looking at you, his eyes widening when he sees the shy smile on your face. you ask, “what if he doesn’t even recognize me?”

“why wouldn’t he? he always looked at you a certain way when you guys talked, he definitely remembers you.”

jaehyun wonders why no one told him more about this “jungwoo” and his apparent more-than-friendly feelings for you? if johnny knows, then does that mean the three of you hung out before without him? how much has jaehyun missed between you and jungwoo? jaehyun silently takes another sip of his drink, his eyes peering over his cup as he watches you get lost in your thoughts.

he thinks you might drop the conversation, but you breath out, “i’ll do it. i’ll go talk to him.”

jaehyun tries his best not to acknowledge the growing jealousy he can feel bubbling up in his throat. he has to bite back a remark that would probably make things worse for himself. he decides to let go of your arm, watching as you easily separate from him. johnny starts hyping you up, giving you encouraging words as jaehyun massages your shoulders.

although jaehyun wishes he could say don’t go over there or i’ll die, he decides to send you a thumbs up before you walk away. his throat burns, and as much as he wants to think it’s from the alcohol, it’s from seeing you walk away from him. you’re walking to someone that isn’t him, sharing your warmth that’s supposed to be jaehyun’s.

he realizes then and there that he shouldn’t be thinking that.

you’re pressed against jaehyun’s bed, his face burying into your neck as he leaves kisses across your skin. you had to tell him to not leave any marks when you feel his teeth nip at your skin, and you could’ve sworn you heard a huff come out of him when you did. he’s practically pinning you down, body barely hovering over yours.

there are days where he gets like this, too desperate to where he doesn’t realize he grips you a little tighter, his voice growing deeper, relieving all of his stress by making you both feel good. you can tell when he gets like this, a quick text of an you up? letting you know what he wants. you’ve grown to learn all his habits.

it does feel a little different today, though. he was quick to greet you, quick to bring you to bed to kiss you. there were no words of how work was hard for him or if he was stressed about something that happened. not that there’s anything wrong with him not saying, but there’s a certain desperation in his movements as his lips trail down your body.

you decide not to ask about it, not wanting to pressure him into talking about something he doesn’t want to talk about. you’re quick to forget about it when he presses a kiss onto your clothed clit. he calls your name, bringing your attention to the heavy gaze he gives you. he murmurs out, “gonna let me see this pretty pussy?”

you nod quickly, lifting your hips up so he can take off your panties. he moves to lay between your thighs, humming when he sees how you’re dripping for him. it’s embarrassing, trying to close your legs. you’re met with his hands keeping them apart, chuckling at the whine you let out.

“didn’t know you could be this wet for me. if i didn’t know any better, i’d think that you need me.”

you let out a small whimper when he traces a finger down your slit, “jaehyun, please, need you to- need you to do something!”

“tell me what you need, pretty. if you don’t tell me, how am i supposed to help?”

“need you, jaehyun! want your fingers, want you to touch me!”

“of course, that’s all i needed to hear.”

you can feel one of his fingers slide into you, your head falling back onto his pillow at the feeling. you clench around his digit, already begging for more, needing him to fill you up. he doesn’t tease you for being so desperate, quickly giving into your pleas as another finger slips inside you. you let out a cry when you feel his thumb circle around your clit.

“such a messy baby, dripping all over my fingers. needed me so bad, right?”

moans of his name tumble out of your lips when he curls his fingers inside you, hitting that spot that sends shocks down your spine. your hands are gripping onto the sheets, realizing just how fast you're about to cum. you’re sure he can feel you clench around his digits, especially when you manage to open your eyes and see him looking straight at you.

“gonna cum all over my fingers?”

“fuck, yes! please, wanna cum, need you to let me cum!”

his movements speed up at your words, “go ahead and show me how much you need it.”

you’re quick to fall apart, your orgasm crashing into you. your thighs shut around his hand that’s helping you ride out your orgasm. all you can hear are the sounds you make and the encouragement that jaehyun mumbles out to you. you’re too fucked out to realize that his clean hand intertwines with yours, his thumb rubbing the back of your hand.

before you can comment on it, he’s quick to pull away from you, hands moving to undo his pants. you move to try to do it for him, but he swats your hands away with a laugh. after letting you gawk at him for a bit, he takes his boxers off, a whine leaving you at the sight of his leaking cock. he tilts his head at you, “are you gonna let me fill your pretty pussy up?”

“please,” you moan. your legs move to wrap around his waist, bringing his hips flush to yours. his cock ruts against your cunt, still sensitive from your last orgasm. he shushes you when you let out a small gasp, one of his hands soothing the skin of your thigh. you let out a small cry when his tips rubs against your clit, the last of your patience running out.

you can tell it’s getting to him, too. his cheeks and ears are flushed, his eyebrows furrowed as he switches between watching your face and where he’s pressed against you. he bites back a groan when his tip catches at your entrance, trying hard not to push into you right then and there. he puts all his focus on you, “tell me that you want me to fill you up. tell me that you need me to fuck you.”

you whine, your head digging into the pillow. despite his flushed face, there’s a cocky look on his face as he stares down at you. you’re too desperate to try to fight back, losing the battle as you let out a whimper of his name. there’s almost a surprised look in his eyes as he sees you give up this easily, leaning down to give you a quick kiss to your collarbone.

“i know, baby, need you just as bad. gonna fuck you like you need it, okay?”

you whisper out a thank you as he moves to line himself up at your entrance. he slowly slides in, letting out a deep groan as he watches himself sink into you. he fights off his eyes from closing at the feeling of your tight cunt clenching around his length. you’re no better, writhing around in the sheets, whimpers of his name escaping you.

once he bottoms out, he lets out a grunt, “missed this pussy so much. so fucking warm, so tight, all for me.” you’re quick to agree, hands trying to reach at his shoulders to bring him closer to you. he gives in easily, huffing at how he can feel himself deeper inside you at the new position. he kisses the valley of your breasts, sucking lightly.

he starts off slow, teasing you as he thrusts into you, slow and deep. if you can listen past your own moans and whimpers, you can hear the quiet curses and sounds he lets out, trying to hide how much you’re affecting him. when your nails claw at his back, he breaks, “didn’t even mean to call you this late, i just needed you so bad.”

his words get to you, the fact that he wanted to call you because he was needy makes you clench around him. he can’t help but pick up the pace of his thrusts at the feeling, the sound of skin slapping against skin filling the room. you don’t know what has him so worked up, but if he’s going to make you feel this good, you might have to figure it out.

you need just a little more, your hand trailing down your body to get to your clit. you moan in relief when your fingers circle your clit, clenching tightly around jaehyun’s length. it has his hips stuttering slightly, eyes making their way to your hand. he’s quick to push your hand away to replace it with his own, thumb making tight circles around the nub. 

he move up to whisper into your ear, “only i can make you feel this good, right? i know you better than anyone else, even yourself.”

you shake your head at his words, but your hips roll up into his, trying to fit more of him inside you. he chuckles lowly at the sight, a small smile on his face as he watches you. he’s slamming into you now, any patience he had now gone as he nears the edge. he starts, “no? trust me, pretty. i know just how you like to be touched, how you liked to be fucked. i know you so well that i just know that you’re close to cumming.”

tears prick your eyes, because yes, you are close to cumming. you can’t help it, not when he’s fucking you like this. he’s not usually this talkative, choosing rather to focus on getting away from any stresses. but now, he’s letting you in on his thoughts, letting you know what could possibly be nagging at him. you’ll save it for another time.

you’re surrounded by all of him, chest touching his as his warm breath hits your neck. you used to wish for him to kiss you during moments like these, moments where you’re both so close, adrenaline too high. now, all you can do is whine out his name, begging for him to let you cum.

it’s easy for you to let go of any past emotions you had for him, but for jaehyun, he wishes he could kiss you. he wishes that you could want him again, wishes that he didn’t have to fuck you like this. this is what he wanted, though. he just didn’t think it would be this hard. he tries to ignore it by groaning into your ear, “gonna cum for me? gonna cum all over my cock?”

“y-yes, please! you make me feel so good!”

“yeah? show me then, pretty girl. show me how i’m the only one who can make you feel this good.”

at the sound of his voice, you cum. your chest arches up into his, nails digging into his back as you let go. he’s moaning at the feeling, his hips stuttering as he tries to fuck into your tight pussy. he has to bite down onto your shoulder at the feeling, holding back just how bad he wants to cum inside you.

when you start whining, he’s quick to pull out of your heat, quickly jerking himself off to the sight of how fucked out you look. with a moan of your name, his cum shoots out over your stomach, his cheeks a pretty pink as he does. 

it’s quiet in his room, save for the deep breaths you both let out. he’s just staring down at you, saving the image of you covered in his cum in his mind. you don’t mind, too tired to notice the slight adoration in his eyes as he stares. it is embarrassing though, covering your face with your arm as you tell him to move.

he blinks away his thoughts, chuckling at your embarrassment. he pats your thigh, moving away as he goes to get a towel to clean you up. he’s being careful with you, his movements slow as the towel moves around your body. there’s a soft look in his eyes, a lazy smile on his face as he indirectly touches you. he’s quick to throw the towel into his laundry basket, even quicker to join you in bed. 

in a motion that almost seems too soft for the fact that he just fucked you into his sheets, he pulls your back into his chest. one of his hands makes it to your side, letting it sit there. his breaths are evening out, fanning across your shoulder that he nuzzles into. his touches are hesitant against your skin, almost as if he was debating on whether or not he could touch you like this.

you almost want to push his hand away or try to make some space between the two of you. friends should not be holding each other like this, friends should not be letting each other bask in the warmth of their bodies. friends shouldn’t even be having sex, not like this.

but you figure just this once, you’ll let yourself have this moment. it’s a bit selfish, getting to have jaehyun like this. you wished he’d hold you like this every single time. you think if he did, you wouldn’t be able to stop yourself from falling back in love with him. there’s no way for you to win when it comes to jaehyun.

as he presses a kiss and murmurs a goodnight into your shoulder, you make a promise to yourself: you won’t ever lose yourself over jaehyun again.

jaehyun realizes how little time he’s been spending with you recently.

he’s been hearing more about this jungwoo guy. you’ve told him can’t hang out, i’m with jungwoo right now or i’ll be hanging out with jungwoo later. you’ve been so busy catching up with jungwoo that jaehyun hasn’t had the time to talk to you. no more eating or shopping together, not when jungwoo’s around.

jaehyun doesn’t want to say he’s necessarily jealous of the relationship you two share, but can’t say it doesn’t sit right with him. jaehyun is still your friend after all, and he doesn’t like hearing you talk so much about him. during the small chances jaehyun gets to talk to you, you always slip in one mention about jungwoo.

what about jaehyun? what does jungwoo have that he doesn’t? he could totally treat and touch you better than jungwoo ever could. he practically does already. he can’t help but let these little thoughts enter his mind. if jungwoo’s in the way, how is jaehyun supposed to show you how much he likes you?

it’s one day that you’re both splayed across his couch, your legs resting over his as his thumb smoothes across the skin of your thigh when jungwoo is brought up again. out of the corner of his eye, he can see you smile and lightly laugh at your phone. jaehyun, being the nosy person that he is, can’t help but try to reach over to see what you’re laughing at.

you’re quick to push him away, chuckling at the sight of the small pout on his face. he tries again, and you decide it’s probably better just to sit beside him instead. you begrudgingly show him your phone, and he squints his eyes so he can read your screen better.

it’s quiet for a few moments before he hums at the texts between you and jungwoo. it’s a conversation funny enough to make you laugh. he tries not to roll his eyes at the cutesy way jungwoo texts, him being clearly interested in you. he doesn’t want to say anything about it though, doesn’t want you to know that jungwoo bothers him for reasons that he shouldn’t be thinking. 

“he’s funny,” jaehyun muses, trying to stop the snarky remark he wants to say.

“way funnier than you,” you tease, watching him deflate back to his side of the couch. 

“there’s been times where you’ve laughed at my jokes though, like laughed laughed.”

“i was either super drunk or bored out of my mind, so those don’t count.”

jaehyun rolls his eyes at you, deciding to ignore your words, choosing to believe that you think he’s the funniest man ever. he’s been finding himself having little competitions with jungwoo that only he’s a part of. jungwoo is funny? jaehyun is funnier. jungwoo is cute? jaehyun is cute, too, just give him a minute.

jaehyun tries to boil it down to the fact he’s always been competitive, but he knows it’s more than that. in his head, it doesn’t matter what jungwoo does better than jaehyun because right now, you're in his apartment, on his couch, deciding to spend meaningless time with him. 

“what have you both been doing? i haven’t seen you at all this week.” he hates how his voice sounds, a little too clingy for his liking, but he hopes you don’t hear it.

“nothing, really. we’ve just been going out to eat or hanging out when we have the time.”

jaehyun figures you both somehow have all the time in the world in order to be hanging out this much. he makes his voice whiny before speaking, “i miss you, please don’t leave me forever.”

you laugh at the sound of his voice, pulling your legs away from him. “you’re acting like me spending time with jungwoo is gonna kill you.”

“what’s killing me is the fact i don’t get to see you that much anymore,” he grumbles. 

he notices that you don’t respond right away, and when he goes to look at you, your eyebrows are furrowed and there’s a certain look in your eyes. did he say too much? before he can start panicking, you turn towards him, “don’t do that.”

“do what?”

“pretend like you miss me when we already spend a lot of time together. you literally called me up the other night.”

jaehyun lets out a breath, “sorry, but you’re still my friend. i do miss you, i’m jealous that jungwoo gets to see you that much.” although he says it jokingly, there’s definitely truth behind his words. it might not mean much to you, but the fact that jungwoo gets to see you in a way that only jaehyun feels like he deserves, it hurts him.

“i’m gonna tell jungwoo you’re being mean to him,” you huff.

“tell him then,” jaehyun slings an arm around your waist, “let him know that he needs to learn how to share.”

“first of all,” you slide his arm off of you, “don’t say it like that because you make it sound like i’m an object. two, i think you might need to learn how to share.”

he hums, “you were mine first.”

“i was never yours,” you grouch, “you made that clear when you rejected me.”

he can tell you’re joking, but he can feel his blood run cold at your words. it’s a reminder to him that the rejection is still clear in your mind, reminding him just how much he hurt you. it will always be a reminder of how he messed up what could've been a good relationship with you if he just had more time.

he can’t blame you for his own mistake. he can’t.

in the best way he can, he puts his hands together and grovels, “please, can you find it in your kind soul to forgive me?”

you scoff, rightfully so, before grabbing your phone to take a picture of him. you’re quiet for a few moments more, jaehyun knowing that you’re about to post the picture on your instagram story for everyone to see, including jungwoo. he doesn’t want to stop you, equal parts of wanting to show off how you’re hanging out with him and a little bit of embarrassment. 

you set your phone down, placing your hands on top of his, “you can stop. now i kinda just feel bad for you. you do deserve it, though.”

jaehyun doesn’t move, staring at you with a certain look in his eyes. he can tell you right here, he thinks. he’s thought about what he’d say if he were to confess to you almost too much. he’s practiced his lines before, thinking up the perfect way he’d confess. it almost feels right to do it now, clearing his throat and-

your phone buzzes, pulling your attention away from him. he grimaces when you show him the notification. what seems to be jungwoo’s account liking your story, the story that has jaehyun begging for your apology posted on it. you sigh dreamily, “told you he’s funny.”

“not funny when it’s jungwoo.”

“jaehyun!”

you find yourself drinking at jaehyun’s place again.

it’s a slow night, both of you had stressful days. you choose to stay in jaehyun’s kitchen, laughing at unfunny words and pouring more wine for each other as the night rolls on. you didn’t mean to stay over so late, but jaehyun practically begged you to spend some time with him. you were quick to say yes under the guise that all he wanted to do was be with his friend.

before the night went too deep, you texted jungwoo saying that you probably won’t be able to call him tonight. he responds quick, a have fun! and i hope you sleep well :) flashing on your screen. you smile warmly at the messages, but quickly notice jaehyun also staring at them. you push at his shoulders, whining over how he’s invading your privacy.

his cheeks are rosy from the wine, a sly smile on his face as he asks, “how am i not supposed to look when i see you smiling like that.”

“you’re supposed to be a good friend and support me in my times of need!”

he puts his hands up in defense, that annoying smile still looking back at you, “thank you for being so vulnerable around me. and who’s to say i don’t support you in your times of need?”

you hear the double meaning in his words, swatting him away, “hey! you’re actually so gross.”

he just chuckles at your words, enjoying how easily you get embarrassed at his teasing. it’s been happening more often, and jaehyun can’t help but piece together that it might be because of jungwoo. jaehyun feels that you might be slipping away right in front of him, and he can’t really do anything to stop it.

you aren’t completely unaware of jaehyun trying to get you to hang out with him. he’s been sending more texts recently, nothing really important being said. you’re not sure how obvious you’re being with jungwoo, but you’re sure that jaehyun has at least an inkling on how you feel about him. which leads you to believe that jaehyun might be a little jealous.

it was never your intention to make him jealous. that night when you first saw jungwoo again was all unplanned. you never thought you would end up talking to him, never thought you’d like the way he treated you. he was so sweet to you, always trying to take care of your every need when prompted.

it’s bad to compare, but you realize that jaehyun’s only being so nice to you now is because jungwoo’s being nice to you. 

that’s not to say that jaehyun was never not nice to you, but you could tell that it’s a different kind of nice when it comes to him. the relationship you have with jaehyun now feels more like a bandaid to cover all of the bad things that have happened, no one bothering to address it. you don’t want to either way, no use in bringing up what shouldn’t be talked about.

even now, as you’re here with him in his kitchen, feeling the cold air from the open window drift in, there’s unspoken words between the two of you. you can hear the music playing from his speakers in the other room, the melody sticking in your head. it’s weird to think that you would’ve never gotten to see jaehyun like this if you didn’t stay with him.

it’s quiet for a few moments, apart from jaehyun humming along to the song that’s playing. it’s dark, his warm lights low as they cover the both of you. it’s nice like this, a little drunk and a little quiet; you don’t have to think about anything you don’t want to. you don’t think before you speak, “i do miss you, too, you know.” 

“yeah?”

“you’re still someone i appreciate, even after everything.”

he doesn’t respond, and you think he’s taking in your words. you’re not sure why you didn’t specify ‘friend’ but you know he knows better than to have his hopes up anymore. you see that the tips of his ears are pink, the lazy smile on his face showing that he’s a bit tipsy too. he’s not looking at you, you’re not really sure what he’s thinking-

“i think… i think i love you.”

“what?”

his eyes immediately snap to yours, widening as he realizes what slipped out of his mouth. slightly panicking, he stands up, trying to backtrack, “no, i- look-”

“what did you say?”

“i’m sorry, i didn’t mean it-”

“what does that even mean? you can’t just randomly say you love me and then take it back?”

he chooses not to answer right away, eyes darting all around as he tries to come up with an answer. he can fix this, he can help himself, it’s just… he doesn’t really want to. it’s almost selfish with how he feels a little relief with his confession. “since you’re asking,” he starts, “i… i like you. i’ve liked you for a while now.”

when he looks at you, the anger from before is still there. you’re biting down on your lip, hands balled at your sides as his words hit you. “jaehyun… do you know how wrong that is? since when? after you rejected me?”

“no, i- fine. yes, after i rejected you. i know it’s wrong and i know i shouldn’t but it clicked for me, even if it was a little late.”

“a little late? jaehyun, you’re telling me this after you know i’m talking to someone. you knew that there’d be a high chance that i wouldn’t feel the same. i know you’re not that dumb.”

“but that’s how you felt when you asked me out? even if there was a chance that i would say no to you, you still did it, right? that’s exactly how i feel, how bad would it be if i tried?”

a shocked laugh leaves you, “that isn’t fair! you’re not being fair! you’re not thinking about how i would feel knowing this!”

you think he knows that it’s not the same between you and him. you confessed because you genuinely thought you had a chance with him. jaehyun’s only confessing because you’re talking to jungwoo. 

“i should’ve never let this happen! fuck, i knew if i kept talking to you, something bad would happen.”

he scoffs, wanting to call out your bluff. “i never forced you to come over and talk. you weren’t forced to come over and have sex with me. you could’ve stopped this at any time, but you kept coming back to me.”

you let out an exasperated sound, “we were friends, jaehyun. friends hang out and talk, that’s literally all we were doing.”

he snaps, “friends don’t fuck. friends don’t hold each other after sex. you can’t say that you didn’t feel anything between us. that’s the whole reason i called you for sex the other day, i needed you."

you can hear how loud your heart is pounding in your chest. your head hurts already, the faint song playing in the other room only adding to the pain. there’s nothing more that you want to do than just go home. you wish you could’ve been more clear, you wished you would’ve drawn a clearer line between the two of you. now you’re stuck like this.

you sigh out, mumbling into the quiet air, “if i had known that you were gonna be like this, i would’ve made sure to end whatever we had as soon as possible.”

“if you never met jungwoo, then this probably never would’ve happened. i could’ve asked you out the normal way, but you kind of forced me into drunkenly confessing to you.”

you send a glare straight at him, “do not assume how i would feel in any situation. the fact that you didn’t even want to tell me that you liked me says everything i need to know.”

“how was i supposed to tell the girl i rejected that i like her now?”

“exactly! don’t you see how fucked up that is?”

he shrugs, closing himself off before you can start up again. you know how he gets, pretending that none of this really matters to him. it’s childish, and you know he knows it. you don’t know what else to do. if he can’t sort himself out, there’s no reason for you to be here anymore.

you’re quick to get up and out of the kitchen. he doesn’t look at you at first, but as soon as he hears you pack your stuff into your bag and your car keys in hands, he follows right after you. there’s a startled look on his face, you can tell that he didn’t think you would leave him. you watch as he raises a hand to stop you, but quickly puts it down after some thought.

you let out a breath, “i’m leaving. you can decide if you want to pull yourself together and grow up if you wanna talk. if not, don’t even bother texting me.”

he doesn’t try to argue, watching as you walk out his door. he can’t feel anything, doesn’t really want to do anything other than lay in bed. he walks over to his bedroom, the sound of a familiar slow song getting louder as he walks closer. he makes it inside, pausing the song before laying down onto his back. it’s quiet again.

he just ruined everything.

for the first time in a while, your life feels kinda normal.

there’s not a lot for you to worry about if you ignore a few things. work is fine, your friends are celebrating your freedom, and jungwoo comforts you in every way possible. you realize that jungwoo might’ve been everything you’ve been looking for in a person. he stays close when you need him and gives you space when you ask.

you tell jungwoo that you’re happy to have him right now. you tell him that you’re sorry for acting a little weird recently (he quickly denies your claim). you don’t tell him exactly what happened with jaehyun, but you can assume he at least knows a little. he doesn’t try to pry it out of you, choosing not to remind you of something you don’t want to think of.

and you’re not thinking about it. you haven’t gotten any texts from jaehyun, so why should you care?

as much as you don’t want to admit it, it does feel weird not having jaehyun in your life. you didn’t realize how much you thought about him or how much time was dedicated to being with him. it didn’t seem to matter at first because you thought it was because you both were friends, but you realize he was kind of stringing you along.

there’s a lot of time you have to yourself now. you don’t have to worry about jaehyun calling you randomly throughout the day or one of his spontaneous meetups. you don’t have to think about his you up? texts during the late hours of the night. you don’t have to think about any hurt he’s caused you in the past. none of it will mean anything anymore.

until you get a call from johnny.

“hey, johnny. what’s up?”

he skips right past your greeting, “why doesn’t jaehyun want to hang out with you?”

you’re shocked for multiple reasons. one, of course, johnny already knows your business. two, how dare jaehyun say he doesn’t want to hang out with you. you scoff, “what exactly did he say?”

“he said he was busy, but, like i know he’s not gonna be busy. and that obviously means that something is going on between you two.”

you want to scream into your phone’s microphone. jaehyun doesn’t deserve to set the boundary between you two. he was the one who messed it up in the first place, so why is he the one trying to put distance between you two? “johnny,” you start, “do you promise not to tell anyone about what i’m about to tell you? you can’t even tell jaehyun.”

he lets out a little shocked sound and you can imagine him sitting up straight. he whispers into the call, “what is it?”

“the other night, jaehyun told me he likes me. actually, in his own words, he said he thinks he loves me.”

he gasps loudly into the phone, “what? are you sure? like jaehyun said that? jaehyun?”

“exactly! it doesn’t even seem like something he’d do! he said it was because we were both drinking.”

“that doesn’t even matter,” johnny sighs, “you don’t go around saying that to your friend, especially not the friend you rejected before.”

“you get it! that’s literally what i told him! i need to sit down with you so we can discuss this.”

it’s quiet on the other side of the call, and by his silence, you can tell he’s planning something. it’s never good when he does, so you try to call out his name before he can think any more, but you’re too late.

“i think you should sit down with him to talk about what happened.”

you sarcastically laugh, “he hasn’t even texted me, there’s no way i’m talking to him first.”

“i didn’t say you should text him first, i’m just saying that you both should talk. you can’t just leave this off on bad terms.”

“and if i want to?”

“i know you don’t. plus, it feels like i’m a child whose parents are going through divorce, so you need to fix this.”

you whine into the phone, which causes johnny to laugh on the other end. he’s right, you don’t want this to end badly with jaehyun. even if you both decide to never talk again, you don’t want to have a strained relationship with him. after a few moments, you answer him, “fine, but don’t have your hopes up because even i don’t know what’s gonna happen.”

“okay, perfect, because i already kinda convinced jaehyun to meet up with you.”

“johnny!”

he defends himself, “like i said, i’m basically seeing you guys go through a divorce. please bring my family back together.”

“whatever, do what you want to do.” johnny cheers from the other end of the call, quickly letting out an you won’t be disappointed! before he hangs up, not even letting you say goodbye. as much as you try to hide it, a part of you is happy at the thought of jaehyun wanting to work things out with you.

even if you don’t know what you want just yet, you’ll get yourself ready.

you realize you’re no longer happy when a few days later, jaehyun shows up to your front doorstep, a frown painted on his face.

you almost want to slam the door on him when he speaks. his voice is quiet, “why did you tell johnny you didn’t want to hang out with me?”

as soon as he stops talking, it all clicks in your head. johnny tricked you both. you’ll have to get mad at him later, but for right now, you have to deal with jaehyun who’s pretending he didn’t just ignore you for almost two weeks. you reluctantly let him in, watching as he walks in almost too normally.

no one bothers talking, no one trying to make the first move. you’re staring him down and he tries to ignore the hard stare you’re giving him. while you’re glaring at him, you can see how he looks more tired than usual. the faint lines under his eyes give it away, and when he does finally make eye contact with you, it’s soft, no anger behind his eyes.

you step back, breathing in before speaking, “let’s go talk in my room.”

he sends you a soft smile, not needing you to guide him to your room. he knows the whole layout by now, feeling more like he’s leading you to your own room. he opens the door for you, choosing to let you walk in first. it’s awkward when you have to motion for him to step in, watching him not really knowing what to do.

you move to sit on your bed, and he moves to sit at your desk. it’s not as awkward as it is tense. you don’t know what to say, you didn’t plan on him coming over. his eyes are darting across your room, his eyebrows furrowed as he presumably tries to start the conversation.

“how are you doing?”

you roll your eyes at the simple question, “i’ve been doing fine. i feel like my life’s been a lot calmer since that day.”

he leans forward in his seat, “really? i feel like i’ve lost ten years of my life.”

deserved, you think. you gather all your thoughts before speaking, “i think the days that i spent without thinking about you really changed how i feel. i realized just how much i was entangled in your life. it wasn’t good for me.”

he looks off to the side, taking in your words. you see the hurt that settles in his face, you see how it’s going to be burned into his memory. he smacks his lips, “i think for me it’s the opposite. i realized during this time without you really solidified my feelings. i can’t lie and say that my feelings have changed, because they haven’t.”

you feel anger bubbling up inside you, but you can’t do that today. you take a few breaths, calming yourself down as you focus on what you’re most curious about, “why did you start liking me?”

“i don’t even know. i know it’s shitty of me to realize how much you mean to me after i said no to your confession. i understand why you said no to me.”

“i’m sorry for getting mad so quickly. it was just so out of the blue, i never would’ve expected you to say that.”

you pat the spot on your bed next to you, calling his name softly. he slowly moves to your side, his eyes focused on his hands splayed across his knees. after all this time without you, he wishes he could hold your hand in his, even if he tried to play it off as a joke. it’s been too long without your touch. you took away the only thing that kept him close to you. 

“can i ask something?”

he nods, putting all of his focus on you. it feels intense when he does, you haven’t had him this close in a long time. you clear your throat, “this wasn’t all because of jungwoo, right?”

he sighs, his jaw clenching as he thinks of the right words to say. he’s deep in thought, and you almost want to tell him to drop it all together. he decides to speak up, “honestly? seeing you both together kind of made me realize my feelings. i was losing you to him, and i really couldn’t handle it. i’m not trying to ruin whatever you have going on with him, i promise.”

you don’t know what else to say. so much of this could've been prevented if you kept an eye out for yourself. you also wouldn’t want to go back and change what you’ve done. you don’t regret ever being jaehyun’s friend, you don’t regret all the memories you’ve made with him. 

“so, this… this is really over then?”

you shrug, “i would think so.”

it’s quiet for a few moments, the both of you letting the thought seep in. “this” has never been defined between the two of you, but you can assume it’s almost everything you do together. what you’re feeling now is close to how you felt when he first rejected you. what’s different now is that you can’t help but feel just a little relieved, ending something that probably should’ve never happened.

in another world, you think you would’ve reciprocated jaehyun’s feelings. it would’ve been easy, pieces easily falling into place as you both fall for each other. it’s almost as if it were supposed to be something that was natural. but jaehyun had given the time for you to move on, and you did. it was too late for him to realize his own feelings.

“we can still be friends if you can handle that.”

he laughs incredulously, “if i can handle that? i’m a grown man, thank you very much.”

“yeah? well i think if i were you, i wouldn’t be able to hold back my feelings,” you tease.

he grumbles, “too soon, you’re too mean.”

jaehyun watches a pretty smile adorn your face, and if it weren’t for the current circumstances, he would tell you how pretty you look. he keeps the thought to himself though, opting to ask, “how about one last drink together as friends who are a little more than friends?”

you hum, pretending to think about it. you watch worry wash over his face, and you do feel bad a little bit. “one more time, just for your sake. you look like you might start crying.”

he groans as you walk away to get some wine for the both of you. you’re by yourself for a few moments as you pour the drinks. you feel awkward in here by yourself, left with thoughts and memories of all the things you’ve done together. all the times you’ve had sex, all the times where he’s felt like your boyfriend, but none of it holds to him being your friend.

you don’t know if you can continue being friends with him. 

it would be unfair to jungwoo. you haven’t told him the exact dynamics of how your friendship with jaehyun worked, but you can assume he knows most of it. 

you return to the sight of jaehyun looking around your room. he’s been in here too many times to count, and yet seeing him here now, it’s weird. he feels out of place, he feels almost like a stranger in your own apartment. despite the history you have with him, it seemed to fall apart so easily as soon as conflict hit.

he thanks you quietly when you hand him the glass. you take a small sip of your drink, watching jaehyun do the same from the corner of your eye. after the drink, he chooses to speak, “so how are you and jungwoo?’

“that’s how you want to start our small talk?” you splutter out.

“i mean, can i not be interested in my friends' love life?”

well it’s hard when you were directly involved in it. you shrug, taking another small sip before speaking, “i’m… really happy that i’m talking to him. he takes care of me, he’s always asking how i’m doing. it’s nice being with him.”

you can tell jaehyun is trying not to let your words affect him, “are you both… officially dating yet?”

his words make you shy, your facing feeling hot at the idea of dating jungwoo. brushing off his words, you laugh, “no! not yet, at least. i think i’d say yes if he asked me out.”

he nods, his head hanging heavy, hand twirling the wine in his glass. you know what he’s thinking, you don’t need to ask him. you can’t be his, you won’t ever be his. you think that this was never supposed to work out, no matter how hard you tried or how much you think he could’ve loved you. he wasn’t meant for you.

“okay, one more thing.”

he nods, turning his attention back on you.

“did you really mean it back then, like, when you said that you weren’t ready for a relationship?”

“yes, i was scared. i think back then, even though i didn’t realize it, i also had feelings for you. but it was… it just wasn’t the right time for me. even though i liked spending so much time with you, there were things i wanted to figure out first.”

you cock your head to the side, “like?”

he hums in thought for a bit, trying to remember times from so long ago. thinking back, you remember how you felt old, you felt like you were already an adult. but he’s right, there were still things you didn’t know about yourself, and you wonder if dating jaehyun would’ve stopped you from figuring them out.

“i guess… mostly wanting to decide what i wanted to do with my life. now that i’ve somewhat settled, i feel more confident in what i want. even though it came at the worst time, i was so sure that i could see you in my future.”

the confession doesn’t hurt as much as you thought it would. you can relate to how he feels. for the longest time, you felt that you needed jaehyun in your life. it wasn’t until after he confessed to you that you saw that there’s more to your life than him. you’re thankful for all the time you’ve had with him, but there’s still so much more for you to do.

it’s like this for a few more hours, the sunset bleeding into the night time. you both have a few more drinks, jaehyun eventually turns on music playing on his phone. you feel a lot better now. you only want the best for jaehyun, and you think that this is the best for the both of you.

jaehyun has to leave at some point, one of the last buses back to his place coming soon. you don’t want him to go, you don’t want him to leave the comfort of your bedroom. there’s a small part of you that’s scared that you’ll never see him here again. you try to remind him that this is what you both need, clear, distinct boundaries.

you walk him to your door, “you’ll text me once you're at your apartment, right?”

he shuffles over, “yeah, i will. johnny will make sure i get there safe.”

you nod, opening the door for him. he walks out, watching you with an unsure look on his face. a part of you wants to let him in, wants to let him give you one last kiss. it’s wrong, your grip on your door getting tighter at the thought. he still has a strong pull on you, your hand wanting to reach for his.

it’s not meant to be.

“goodnight, jaehyun. i’ll see you soon, okay?”

“alright, goodnight. i… i’ll be here if you ever need me. i’ll wait.”

you smile, “i know. thank you, get back safe.”

he nods, waving you off before he walks away. you close the door, locking it behind you. it’s quiet now, no soft conversations, no laughing, just the sound of your feet pattering on the floor. 

you don’t really feel like crying. you don’t feel like there’s something missing inside you. jaehyun used to be a big part of you, but as time went on, he took up less and less space.

there’s more important things to worry about than someone who couldn’t make time for you. you have time to figure things out now, you have time to figure out what you really want, whether that’s jungwoo or someone else. 

you’ve never felt better. 

as jaehyun scrolls through instagram, he sees a post from you. it’s been a while since he’s seen you in person, so he’ll take anything he can get. the first few photos are of you, and the next few are pictures of things he assumes you found pretty. the last photo is what makes him pause, a photo of what he can only assume is jungwoo holding your hand.

he checks the comments, some of your friends replying with different emojis, all to tease you with. they all seem to know about your budding relationship with jungwoo. jaehyun’s glad that it’s going well for the both of you. it’s what you deserve after what he put you through.

he hung out with you and johnny the other day. as much as everyone tried to be normal, he couldn’t shake off the feeling that he changed the dynamics of your friendship. you and johnny were the same, easily laughing and joking around with each other. it’s not exactly awkward when you and jaehyun talk, but the air around you is certainly different.

it’s what should’ve happened, at the start of it all you both should’ve set rules. jaehyun realizes that he would’ve never gotten to see you in the ways he did. warm lights from his kitchen painting over your skin, or when the light from the moon would shine over your body while he holds you close. he wouldn’t trade those memories for anything.

you were all he had, and losing you is something he will always regret. he knows that you’re doing good now, not just with jungwoo. he doesn’t want to come in and ruin what you’ve built up. it doesn’t matter how much he wants to hold you in his arms or kiss you, you’re better off without him.

he just wishes he had more time.

a/n: hey people... what did we think of this ending... jaehyun is my friend i do not hate him i like him... anyways i hoped u like this... it took longer than i thought it would but im glad its out HOORAYYY

taglist: @froggyforyoongi @the-universe-in-you-jjh @ppeachyttae @omlhyck @hazyhae @haechology @jaehyunful @girlwholoveslpreppyattire @diorcities @hrts4doie @ohmytyong @ecvm5236 @faeryus @riri4andy @rjtulips @missesgirl @shiorebirth @sugaringgcaramel @camomillie @ninicornposts @il02isa @sincerelyneo @perfumejamal @justhgiwo @lovingyoulovinme2 @babyriannie @eunseoksimp @jeonreal @mawnehkah @shoetaroshoe (thank u all omg 🫂❤️)

[reareaotaku]

No Fun Babysitting

Summary: Greg's mother gets him and Manny a babysitter, because Rodrick is 'too busy' with Band practice, and she wants a reliable sitter while her and Frank go out. Though, Rodrick's plans change when he finds out who the babysitter is. Pairings: Rodrick x Fem! Reader [Since my Rodrick posts always tend to do well, here's another you Rodrick lovers!] God this probably so dumb lol. So sorry if it's bad lol

"A babysitter?" Greg looked at his mother like she was crazy. He was 13, he didn't need a babysitter! Maybe Manny, but certainly not him. "Why do I need a babysitter?"

His mother, Susan, finishes drying off a plate, before turning towards him, "Well, Rodrick," She gestures to Rodrick who was sitting at the dining room table eating a bowl of cereal, "has a gig and I need someone reliable to watch you and Manny while me and your father are out."

"Doesn't Gramma usually watch Manny?" Rodrick asked, since they had never offered to pay HIM to watch the kids.

"She's busy."

"Why can't I watch Manny?"

Susan laughs, causing Greg to frown and roll his eyes.

"Oh, Greg. You have not shown me you are responsible enough to care for a goldfish, much less your little brother. Besides, she's supposed to be really good, her name is Y/n."

Rodrick almost spit out his food when he heard the name of Y/n and he was very quick to clarify, "Y/n? Like Y/n L/n, Y/n?"

Susan hums, before rubbing her chin and nodding, "Yes I believe so."

"She's going to be here?"

"Why do you care?" Greg quick asked, suspicious.

"I don't," Rodrick quickly justifies, trying to cover up his previous excitement. He quickly gets up and heads to his room, completely forgetting about the food.

Susan and Greg watched as he left, while the latter grew suspicious.

---

"Thank you so much for coming at such late notice," Susan hands you Manny, who wiggled in her grasp.

"It's really no problem, Mrs. Heffley. I hope you and your husband have a good night out."

"Me, too," She jokes, before shaking her head, "Our numbers are on the fridge and if we don't answer, there's the number of the restaurant...."

You nod your head, listening as she goes on and on about safety and such. When she finally left, you waved her off before carrying Manny into the living room. "So, what do you like to do, Manny?"

Before he could answer, Rodrick quickly rushes in, his guitar hanging off his back. He was covered in sweat and his hair was dismayed/a mess. He pushes his hand through his hair, before looking at you in feigned confusion.

"Oh, Y/n right? I didn't know you were going to be here."

"What are you talking about? Mom sai-"

Rodrick quickly got his shoe and threw it at Greg, hitting him smack in the face. He [Rodrick] pushes inbetween you and Manny, leaning on his hand, "Hey."

"Hi?" You looked past him, towards Manny, who was pushing on Rodrick's back.

"What.. uh, brings you around?"

"Um... What do you mean?"

He turns to face forward , leaning back on his hands, "Uh, you know, ummm...." He clicks his tongue, before looking back at you, "You like music, right?"

"Everyone likes music."

"Right!" He stands up pointing to you, Manny finally looking relieved that Rodrick had moved from his spot.

Manny gets down from the seat and pulls out a puzzle from under the table. You watch him closely as Rodrick still continues to talk.

"I'm in a band, you should come listen."

"Uhuh... Band?" You now looked at him when registering his words.

"Oh, yeah. We're called the Loaded Diaper [Löded Diper]."

"Loaded Diaper?"

"Yeah."

"When you hear them, you'll understand the name," Greg jokes, before hiding under the table when seeing Rodrick's glare.

You look at Greg, before humming and nodding, "I see. Ummm... What kind of music do you guys play?"

"Rock."

"Oh, yeah, that makes sense... Um... Maybe I can come some time."

"Yeah, you should. Just let me know when you're free."

"Yeah, will do."

He walks away from the living room and out the front door, but not before fist bumping, thrilled to have a 'date' kind of.

[spicyspiders]

something that never existed

Francis Mosses x male reader smut

1.4k words

This is really dark. Francis gives the reader a bottle of milk that makes him feel funny, follows him home, and then takes care of him.

It hits you during the middle of your shift. You aren’t sure of what, but the feeling of it has grown more intense each hour since it began. Pushing through the double doors is harder than when you did it this morning, your arms feeling heavy. 

The cool evening air against your skin nearly has you moaning. Your skin burns, and the refreshing air makes you want to tear off your clothes. Each step against the pavement feels heavy as you slug your way to your home. If you were a passerby, you would probably be annoyed hearing the loud sound of your shoes against the sidewalk, but even though the noise filled your ears again and again, you could also hear the quieter steps of someone behind you. 

Someone fucking drugged you. Or maybe something made it through the slot in your workstation. Or maybe–

You didn’t fucking know. All you knew was that because of it, you were half-hard by the time you made it to your front door. 

“Are you following me?” You asked loudly as you leaned your sweaty forehead against your door. You panted against the door as you waited for a response. You laughed to yourself as you stuck your hand into your pocket to get your keys. Great, alongside the lust, you were also going crazy. 

“You looked like you needed help. So yes, I followed you,” a voice said from behind you. 

Your eyebrows drew together, trying to recognize the voice. It only took a few moments to pinpoint where you knew it from. You heard nearly a hundred voices a day at your job, but there was something about the man’s voice that was different and made it memorable. 

You just couldn’t remember his name though. Frank? Fraser? Frederick? You didn’t really care to try and remember his name. You had more pressing matters, like picking up the keys you had finally pulled from your pocket and then dropped on the fucking ground. 

“Let me,” Frank, Fraser, or Frederick says, his voice much closer behind you. “Here,” he says, now beside you. 

You hold your hand out to accept the cold metal into your palm. You hope the man will just leave as you close your fingers around the keys and the sharp metal digs into your palm, but the man stays. 

“I’m fine,” you say to the man, sticking the key into the knob with your shaky hands. 

“Let me at least help you get inside,” the man responds, one of his hands moves to your shoulder, while the other goes to your waist to hold you upright.  

“Fuck,” you whisper. Where he touches you somehow feels warmer than the rest of your body feels, even over your clothes. His voice brings you back to earlier in the day when he showed up to the window to be let in. You thought it was pretty weird for a milkman to deliver to his own apartment building, but it definitely wasn’t the weirdest thing you saw during your shift. 

“Let me in?” He had asked you earlier that day. Through the window, you could see his carrier full of milk bottles, but you could also see an extra bottle in his other hand. 

“Making an extra delivery for today?” You asked as you looked over the papers he gave you. 

The man didn’t answer. He must not have heard you, you thought. He nodded in appreciation when you gave his papers back and pressed the button to unlock the door. You thought that was going to be that, but the man got your attention again after you had started going through other papers on your desk. 

“This is for you, actually,” he said as he held the bottle up. One corner of his mouth twitched up, making it look like for once, he wasn’t miserable. 

“Oh,” you said in surprise. You weren’t sure if you were allowed to accept gifts, but took the bottle anyway through the slot under the window. 

“You must get thirsty back there.”

“Yeah,” you chuckled lightly, “my mouth can get dry with all of the talking I do.”

He left after that, but you swore his eyes had flicked down to your lips before he walked through the door. 

“Did you put something in that milk?” You asked, pulling the key from the knob. 

Francis. You remembered as his hand went over yours on the knob. You could see the document in your head, as you tried to remember if the man with you now was the same from earlier in the day. 

“Did you like it?” He asked, “I made it just for you,” he said into your ear, his warm breath puffing across your ear. 

With strength you didn’t know you still had, you sent your elbow backward into the man’s chest. You thought that would be enough, but found yourself on the other side of the door with Francis on your back. 

“What’d you do to me?” You moaned against the door. His weight on your back was heavy as he held you against the door. This close, you could feel the length of his cock digging into your lower back. 

You let out another moan, but this time, Francis lets out one that matches yours when he grinds his hard cock into your back. His hands go to your hips to maneuver you around so he can grind his cock into the meat of your ass. 

“You don’t know how long I’ve wanted this,” Francis says, laying his body along the length of your back so he can say the words directly into your ear. 

Enough to drug you, you guessed. Whatever he gave you was enough to turn your brain to mush, and the only control you had was dedicated to pushing your ass back into his cock. 

“Please,” you whined, “it hurts.” Francis lets you fall slowly to the floor and makes his way to hold himself tightly against your back. What hurts is your hard cock, but of course, Francis knows that the relief you need comes in the form of his hands between your legs. 

“I’ve got you, sweetheart,” Francis whispers. His fingers skillfully get your pants open, and then his fingers– the same ones you saw earlier today hand you his papers, wrap around your cock. 

You immediately fuck your hips into his fist, much closer than you expected. You hoped that with your release, Francis would be leaving along with it. Maybe you had fallen asleep at your station and this was some fucked up dream you were having. Letting your head fall forward to thunk into your door didn’t wake you up, so it’s likely that this was real. 

“You’re so wet here,” Francis says in amazement as his fingers collect the precum from the head of your cock and what had already leaked down the shaft. He hooks his chin on your shoulder before he pulls his hand from your cock, and up to his mouth. 

He groans into your neck when he gets the taste on your tongue, “Francis,” you whisper, hoping that saying his name would be enough. You didn’t want to beg, after all, your hard cock should be evidence enough of what you needed. 

“I’m sorry,” Francis says, kissing his apology into the soft skin of your neck. Though it wasn’t on your lips, the press felt electric. “I just needed a taste.”

His words go straight to your cock and you feel another bead of precum drip from the head, just in time for Francis’ fingers as they wrap around the base. 

You cum to Francis’ long fingers around your cock and to the feel of his cock digging into your back. With his chest pressed to your back, the groan he lets out as you come undone under his hands travels through your body. It almost feels as if he’s so close that he’s a part of you and the noise comes from your mouth. It makes you feel crazy. What makes you feel even crazier though is how much you moan for the man as your orgasm courses through your body.    

Francis holds your body up with an arm wrapped around your stomach as you pant against the door and come down from the orgasm that just shot through your body. “Let’s go to bed, sweetheart,” Francis says, his voice full of promise, “it’s been a long day.”

It must be the drugs, you thought as you let him pull you up from the floor. Your soft cock gives a twitch from where it hangs between your legs. You weren’t even sure if it was worth buttoning your pants back up. 

Francis was right, it had been a long day, but you had a feeling that you also had a long night ahead of you. 

[fuckyeahisawthat]

There are so many places in the Villeneuve Dune adaptations where he just...takes all the narrative pieces that Frank Herbert laid out and subtly rearranges them into something that tells the story better--that creates dramatic tension where you need it, communicates the themes and message of the book more clearly, or corrects something in the text that contradicts or undermines what Herbert said he was trying to say.

The fedaykin are probably my favorite example of this. I just re-read a little part of the book and got smacked in the face with how different they are.

(under the cut for book spoilers and length)

The fedaykin in the book are Paul's personal followers, sort of his personal guard. They show up after his legend has already started growing (the word doesn't appear in the book until chapter 40) and they are people who have specifically dedicated themselves to fighting for him, and right from the moment they're introduced there is a kind of implied fanaticism to their militancy that's a bit uncomfortable to read. They're the most ardent believers in Paul's messianic status and willing to die for him. (They are also, as far as you can tell from the text, all men.)

In the book, as far as I can remember (I could be forgetting some small detail but I don't think so) there is no mention of armed resistance to colonialism on Arrakis before Paul shows up. As far as we know, he created it. ETA: Okay I actually went back and checked on this and while we hear about the Fremen being "a thorn in the side" of the Harkonnens and we know that they are good fighters, we don't see anything other than possibly one bit of industrial sabotage. The book is very clear that the organized military force we see in the second half was armed and trained by Paul. This is exacerbated by the two-year time jump in the book, which means we never see how Paul goes from being a newly deposed ex-colonial overlord running for his life to someone who has his own private militia of people ready to give their lives for him.

The movie completely flips all these dynamics on their head in ways that add up to a radical change in meaning.

The fedaykin in the movie are an already-existing guerrilla resistance movement on Arrakis that formed long before Paul showed up. Literally the first thing we learn about the Fremen, less that two minutes into the first movie, is that they are fighting back against the colonization and exploitation of their home and have been for decades.

The movie fedaykin also start out being the most skeptical of the prophecy about Paul, which is a great choice from both a political and a character standpoint. Of course they're skeptical. If you're part of a small guerrilla force repeatedly going up against a much bigger and stronger imperial army...you have to believe in your own agency. You have to believe that it is possible to win, and that this tiny little chip in the armor of a giant terrifying military machine that you are making right now will make a difference in the end. These are the people who are directly on the front lines of resisting oppression. They are doing it with their own sweat, blood and ingenuity, and they are not about to wait around for some messiah who may never come.

From a character standpoint, this is really the best possible environment you could put Paul Atreides in if you want to keep him humble. He doesn't get any automatic respect handed to him due to title or birthright or religious belief. He has to prove himself--not as any kind of savior but as a good fighter and a reliable member of a collective political project. And he does. This is an environment that really draws out his best qualities. He's a skilled fighter; he's brave (sometimes recklessly so); he's intensely loyal to and protective of people he cares about. He is not too proud to learn from others and work hard in an egalitarian environment where he gets no special treatment or extra glory. The longer he spends with the fedaykin the more his allegiance shifts from Atreides to Fremen, and the more skeptical he himself becomes about the prophecy. This sets up the conflict with Jessica, which comes to a head before she leaves for the south. And his political sincerity--that he genuinely comes to believe that these people deserve liberation from all colonial forces and his only role should be to help where he can--is what makes the tragedy work. Because in the end we know he will betray all these values and become the exact thing he said he didn't want to be.

There's another layer of meaning to all this that I don't know if the filmmakers were even aware of. ETA: rescinding my doubt cause based on some of Villeneuve's other projects I'm pretty sure he could work it out. Given the time period (1960s) and Herbert's propensity for using Arabic or Arabic-inspired words for aspects of Fremen culture, it seems very likely that the made-up word fedaykin was taken from fedayeen, a real Arabic word that was frequently used untranslated in American news media at the time, usually to refer to Palestinian armed resistance groups.

Fedayeen is usually translated into English as fighter, guerrilla, militant or something similar. The translation of fedaykin that Herbert provides in Dune is "death commando"...which is a whole bucket of yikes in my opinion, but it's not entirely absurd if we're assuming that this fake word and the real word fedayeen function in the same way. A more literal translation of fedayeen is "self-sacrificer," as in willing, intentional self-sacrifice for a political cause, up to and including sacrificing your life.

If you apply this logic to Dune, it means that Villeneuve has actually shifted the meaning of this word in-universe, from fighters who are willing to sacrifice themselves for Paul to fighters who are willing to sacrifice themselves for their people. And the fedaykin are no longer a group created for Paul but a group that Paul counts himself as part of, one member among equals. Which is just WILDLY different from what's in the book. And so much better in my opinion.

[rewinded-time]

tags from @fanshipper1412

I need more Home Alone and Batman crossover content. Specifically in the form of Kevin Mccalister becoming Robin. He is just so Robin shaped. He’s got the sass, a very Robin skill set, and the abandonment issues prerequisite. Give that kid a cape and 8 hours of prep and he’s taking down the rouges gallery single handedly. There is no world in which Bruce Wayne meets this gremlin of a child and doesn’t adopt him on the spot.

[clownsuu]

Just a lil doodles smhhhh

cw: mentions of violence and distress. Also weapons-

This is probably a good time to mention everyone’s jobs since I keep forgetting to mention it JDHDGDH

Wally: Da Boss (yeah no shid) he isn’t that merciful of a boss- can be very brutal with how relentless he can be and is a bit of a (non sus) sadistic a s s sometimes. Usually is playfully humorous initially, but can quickly go sour if he feels ever so slightly ticked. Preferred weapon: his eyes and his arms.

Barnaby: Body guard, boss’s left hand man, usually the one who talks for the boss. Sometimes he’s even seen as the “unofficial” boss of the whole group (which he likes to humor sometimes) but in the end he is possibly the most loyal out of everyone to Wally (man’s best friend after all). Preferred weapon is “da biggest gun we got!!!”

Howdy: Butler, bartender, boss’s right hand man. Will do basically everything anyone says (who’s part of the family) without question, however he will always take the Boss’s requests as main priority over the others. This will often keep him awake and exhausted, and a few new stitches to add to his collection. He has the lowest ability to think freely. Preferred weapon: Ice pick

Julie: Hitman A, interrogator, mad scientist really. Killing isn’t really too much of her thing, she prefers methodical planning and slow suffering with the use of chemicals and even random substances she can get her lil paws on. She’s not afraid to use anyone as a test subject, even if it’s her own members. preferred weapon: tranquilizers

Sally: Hitman B, intimidator, c h a o s. Almost the complete opposite to Julie. Absolutely chaotic and adores violent bloodshed to a point it’s theatrical. Usually is called if they don’t really need a clean kill. Can often be seen dancing and listening to music while on the job, often says it helps her focus (nobody really argues with it). Preferred weapon: anything blunt and/or violently loud (tasers, rocket launchers, fireworks) (sally is banned from using rocket launchers)

Poppy: Medic, crime scene cleanup, voice of reason, sometimes chef. She does ok when it comes to clean ups and stuff, however she has panic attacks and gets terrified when ever she hears screams of pain/torture, and freezes. Typically Howdy is there to help her snap out of it and help her complete her work, if not do her work for her. Everyone, even including the boss, is there to support her when she’s distressed (everyone would hug her except Wally. He does not like being touched unless it’s Howdy or Barnaby). Preferred weapon: n/a

Eddie: Messenger, delivery pick up/drop off, handler of the goods. He usually goes by himself, however after an incident where he lost his arm from a deal gone wrong, he is now required to leave with at least one of the hitmen (typically Sally). Very often does he get hurt in these trips and is usually always saved by Sally. Absolutely adores Frank for always trying to find the safest routes for him and wishes they had time together alone. Preferred weapon: a simple revolver

Frank: In charge of ordering goods, making contacts, being a voice of reason, basically just a manager. The most stressed member of the group. Rarely is he seen outside of the headquarters unless it’s to talk to well known individuals. He doesn’t usually talk to anyone besides Howdy (ranting at the bar about people), Eddie (telling him what he needs to get next), and Julie (normal convos and her asking him to order new chemicals for her next project). Every time Frank thinks he has an intimate moment together alone with Eddie, out of the blue Eddie would just randomly talk about how much he loves the family and how Wally is so amazing. The next day Frank asks him about it, it seems Eddie doesn’t remember what happened yesterday. Frank has the highest ability to think freely. Preferred weapon: a simple glock.

Home: Voice of reason. Preferred weapon: Wally

[hotshotsxyz]

7x10 coda. beware the spoilers

Three months pass, and Eddie still isn’t used to it. It’s too quiet at home, and too awful at work, and he still grabs two bowls every morning even though he’s the only one eating.

He thinks about quitting, again. Leaving behind Captain Asshole and following Christopher to Texas. He knows he can’t. He’d promised. Eddie clenches his fists and forces himself to finish buttoning his uniform.

He sends Christopher a text, the same one he sends every morning, then shuts his phone in his locker.

“Line up in five,” Gerrard bellows from the loft. “If you’re late, you’ll be scrubbing the rig with a toothbrush, no exceptions.”

Eddie stands mechanically and walks over to the bay.

Another day, another goddamn reason to bury himself in blankets and hide until the world ends.

Buck invites him over for dinner most nights, or offers to go home with him. Eddie says no more than he says yes, but Buck… Buck’s always known Eddie better than he knows himself. He doesn’t stop asking.

“C’mon Eddie, it’ll be fun—you, me and Tommy, we can come up with ways to drive Gerrard insane.”

Buck looks at him, soft and imploring, an expression Eddie rarely knows how to refuse. But despite everything that’s happened, Buck’s managed to carve out a small sliver of happiness, and Eddie doesn’t want to drag him down.

“You go ahead,” he says. “I’m picking up half a shift at  the 136 tomorrow. Need to get some sleep.”

It’s true and it’s not. He is picking up the shift, but he doubts he’ll sleep.

He goes back to therapy, but he never knows what to say. It was all—everything was in his head, last time. It’s not, now. It’s all real, and it all hurts, and no amount of talking about it makes it hurt any less. He says as much to Frank.

“Then why are you here?” Frank asks.

Eddie looks away. “I don’t know,” he says.

That’s not quite true either.

Kim calls him, and Marisol doesn’t. She leaves voicemail after voicemail, apologizing for that night. Eddie can never bring himself to answer the phone. Eventually, he blocks her number.

He texts his own apology to Marisol, but it never goes through. It’s probably for the best—he doubts the message would’ve made either of them feel better.

Eddie needs—he doesn’t know. Before, he would’ve said time. Now though, he’s got all the time in the world, and he’s desperate to get rid of it.

Buck calls. Eddie can’t answer him, either. He lets it ring out, then listens to the voicemail.

“Hey Eds, it’s me. I uh—just wanted to check in. It’s been a couple days. Call me when you can.”

Eddie tells himself he will, but he has no idea when that’ll be.

Christopher doesn’t text him, but he does text Buck.

Eddie never asks what he says, and Buck usually doesn’t offer to tell him.

“Just—he’s okay, right?”

Buck smiles, a little bit sad, and leans into Eddie’s space. “He’s okay,” he says. “He misses you, even if he’s not ready to tell you that.”

Tears streak down Eddie’s face before he even realizes he’s crying. Buck wipes one away and pulls him against his chest.

“What if he never comes home,” Eddie whispers into the soft material of Buck’s sweater.

“He will,” Buck replies. “He will.”

Good morning, Eddie texts on the one hundred and second day since Christopher left. I love you, and I hope you have a good day.

He drops his phone on the table and tries not to hope for a response. A second later, though, it dings. Eddie’s heart leaps into his throat as he scrambles to open the message.

Morning, Dad.

[jonnywaistcoat]

Hi Jonny, if you don't mind I have a question about the TMA TTRPG! So I noticed that on the player's guide there's this guy, who my friends and I assumed is probably Jon. If it is him, is this a canon design, or more like some of the non-canon stuff that's in the merch?

So, I hope you don't mind if i use this ask to go a bit off on one. I'm not specifically dragging you (I'm actualy glad you asked, as I've thinking about posting on the topic), but all the discussion around the RPG art and how "official" or "canon" it might be is, to my mind, slightly silly.

First up, is it "official" art? I mean, yeah, its art for the officially licenced Magnus Archives RPG. This means Monte Cook Games have commissioned someone to do a beatiful illustration broadly based on some aspect, episode or character from the podcast and it goes in the book. But that's kinda all it means. "Official" is a legal distinction, not an artistic one. The fact that it's in an official product doesn't make it any less one artist's cool interpretation of a character that has only been vaguely described in audio.

Second, is it Jonathan Sims the Archivist? I mean, it's probably based on the idea of him, but it's certainly not set in stone. When we were first discussing art with MCG, we advised that character pictures be more vibes-based and not explicitly tied to specific people (ie. a portrait inspired by Tim wouldn't be captioned "This is Tim" and wouldn't be placed opposite a profile for Tim Stoker, archival assistant.) This was mainly because we wanted the artists to have plenty of freedom to interpret and not feel too tied down by the need to know everything about the podcast. But, to be frank, it was also because we know that there are a few fans out there that are kinda Not Chill about what they've personally decided these characters look like and can get a bit defensive over depictions that differ.

It strikes me as particularly strange to be having this discussion about art that's for a roleplying game book. Something that's explicitly and solely designed to give you the ability to play in your version of the Magnus universe. The idea that this is the thing where we'd for some reason try to immutably establish unchangable appearances for these characters would be pretty funny if some folks weren't taking it so seriously. Similarly ridiculous is the idea we could reasonably have said to MCG "We'd love for you to make a huge beautiful RPG book of our setting... Just make sure you don't depict any of the iconic characters or events from it!"

But... is it "canon"? Now, to my mind, this highlights a real weakness in a lot of fandom thinking around "canon", which is that it generally has no idea what to do with adaptations. All adaptation is interpretation, and relies on taking a work and letting new creatives (and sometimes the same ones) have a different take on it. Are the appearances of the Fellowship of the Ring in the LOTR movies "canon"? How much, if at all, does that matter? Neil Gaiman's book Neverwhere was originaly a 90s BBC series made with a budget of 50 pence; is anyone who makes fanart of Mr Croup that doesn't look like the actor Hywel Bennet breaking canon? What about the novel that describes the character differently? Or the officially licenced Neverwhere comic where he looks like neither of them? Which is his "canon appearance"?

Canon is an inherently messy concept, and while it is useful for a creative team trying to keep continuity and consistency within a creative work, for thinking about anything beyond that it tends to be more hinderance than help.

Anyway, all this is to say that the above picture and all the others in the RPG are exactly as canon as every other picture you've ever seen of the Archivist.

[thecuriousbeauty]

Traitor-The Present

Chapter Five

Warnings: Gun, violence, physical assault. Smut. Degradation, fingering, slight anal play, spanking, cum play, oral (male receiving), choking.

Summary: Just when y/n starts to think that Harry isn't the old mafia gang's leader, she discovers some secrets about him that makes her wonder whom she really fell in love with.

Word Count: 8.3k

Catch up on the story here: Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three*, Chapter Four* ______________________________________

There couldn’t be a better place to be, y/n thought, as she sat beside Harry on the beach side, gritty sand in between her toes and the cool breeze making her feel refreshed. Harry’s arm around her shoulders kept her close to him, close enough that his fresh, masculine scent blanketed her. 

“I want to stay here forever. It’s so beautiful.”, y/n tells him. “The sea looks so calm.”

“It may be calm now, but I feel like it’s getting ready for war. Quiet, and calculating.”, Harry spoke softly, and y/n looked at him, raising her eyebrows. Harry chuckles, pressing a kiss to her temple. “It is beautiful though."

“Well, when you put it like that..”, y/n mumbles. She wonders what goes inside Harry’s mind half the time. 

“I’m hungry.”, Harry says, nudging his nose against her cheek. “Me too, let’s go grab some food. What do you think is good here?”

y/n and Harry talk as they walk to a shack It was located on the beachside, with a live band and people dancing.

"Do you think where we live is unsafe? It's not the first time you've mentioned about me moving someplace else and settling down.", Harry asks y/n, referring to their previous conversation, just before they told each other how they feel.

"Um, I-I'm just worried, the crime reports from our place increases every day.", she quickly comes up with something, and Harry cocks his head to the side, not believing her. "Uh huh. And it’s not because you want me to go away?”

y/n laughs, and nudges his ribs. “Now why would I want that?”

They walk into the shack, and she leads him to a table at the back. She notices two men eyeing her as she walks in. They were swinging beer from their bottles. One of them winks at her, and she turns away, ignoring them.

y/n and Harry look at the menu and decide on what they want to get.

"You don't have to worry about my safety, y/n. I can take care of myself.", Harry tells her. "And I'll take care of you."

She smiles, leaning into his side as she feels cold. Harry was warm. They have their food, and y/n gets up to use the restroom. On her way back, she feels a squeeze on her ass, and shivers climb up her spine. That was not Harry.

She looks back to see the man who winked at her earlier.

"Hi beautiful, want to take it somewhere private?", he grins, showing her his teeth as he runs one of his hands through his messy black curls. A cigarette stuck out between his lips.

"No. Touch me again and I'll report you.", she warns, and the man laughs, looking over at his friend. "Feisty one, this."

"Told you she'd be a good one. You can tell from the rack.", the other guy walks towards them, eyes on her breasts.

"Shut the fuck up and stop staring at me. I'm going to-" One of them grabs her wrists. "Don't tell us what to do, little girl. We will-"

"-Finish that sentence, and you won't have a tongue to say anything again."

y/n struggles to get her wrists free as she sees Harry glaring at them both. "Let her go, now."

"Ah hah, this is getting interesting. Got your boyfriend out to play huh? Show us what you got, man."

Harry didn’t hesitate. He smirked, before he punched his fist straight into the man's nose. He groans and holds his nose.

"Your turn now. Let. Her. Go."

Before Harry could reach him, the guy pushes y/n away with force, and her hip hits the drinks counter making her yelp, her head smashing on a glass.

“You fucking bastard!”, Harry charged at him.

"Oh my god. I told you to keep those douchebags out, Frank!" A lady helps y/n onto a chair, probably the owner of the shack. "Are you okay darling? Oh god, I'm so sorry. They're such creeps, always getting into trouble."

y/n was too shocked to reply. Shocked because of what she was watching. Harry had the man who grabbed her on the ground. He was kicking him, growling. "I warned you. Nobody fucking touches my girl!"

Everyone in the shack watches as Harry beats the crap out of him.

"Harry!", y/n shouts as the other man prepares to swing a bottle against Harry's head from behind. Harry's arm shot up to grab his arm, without even turning back, and with one grunt, he flipped him over, making him fall at his feet with a big groan of pain.

"Harry that's enough-", y/n tried to say, but Harry wasn't listening to her. He was burning with rage. y/n noticed that every kick and every punch he threw was while he stood in perfect form. His biceps flexed while he reached behind him and the veins in his neck popped. What he did to the guys was rough, but his movements were sharp and defined. 

“Who do you think you are Mr. Show Off?” Suddenly, a few other men joined the fight, and they were armed. One of them held a pocket knife, and the other held a baseball bat. Two others screamed as they ran to Harry.

y/n brought her hand to her mouth in shock as she realized something. All these four men who joined now were the ones that were following them, back at home. They were the ones who kept watching them.

y/n wanted to pull Harry into safety, but she didn't have to. Two arms projected out and grabbed one of their necks, while he punched the other one's head, throwing them both onto the wall. He kicked the knife out of the third's hand, and y/n thought he looked like he was flying in the air after the kick made the man slam onto the floor with a big thud.

The last man standing raised his baseball bat, and Harry slams on to him, leaving them both on the ground.

Harry was unscathed. Six men were down, and he continued to beat them up, making sure no one could get up again. A normal man couldn't fight like this.

This was the job of an experienced fighter. He had been in fights way worse than this before. Even if Harry couldn't remember how he could do it, his body was moving out of muscle memory.

This was what y/n was searching for. Some glimpse of him from the past life. The man that everyone was afraid of. y/n now saw why.

Harry groans, looking down at the injured men. "Don’t you dare lay a fucking finger on my girl again.”

All his anger vanishes when he looks at y/n. Her small frame was shaking. He rushes to her, and grabs her wrists. "Are you okay, y/n?"

She nods, looking at the blood on his knuckles. "H-Harry.."

"It's not mine.", he assures. He put his arm around her. "Come on, let's go."

She feels everyone's eyes behind their backs as Harry walks them out of the shack. y/n's head hurt. She wasn't sure if it was because of the injury, or because of everything she saw. What was she thinking? They had warned her that Harry could get dangerous. She was scared.

Harry held her hand tight in his as he led them to their room, and then to the bathroom.

"Harry..", y/n opens her mouth, taking a breath as he looks through his bag for something. "Y-You-"

"There are glass shards on your head baby, let me take care of it for you.", Harry cuts her off, coming back with a bag, it probably had some first aid stuff. It was bigger than a normal first aid kit, but he was a doctor by profession, so it made sense. He washes his hands, and she searches his eyes for the look she saw a few minutes ago. How his eyes were darker, and there was no hint of kindness on his face.

Harry grabs her waist, and places her on the slab next to the sink, before going through his first aid supplies. 

"Any dizziness? Headache?", Harry asks softly, gently taking her face. One of his hands held her chin, tilting it up while his other hand examined the wound carefully.

"H-Head hurts a bit..", she mumbles, and Harry nods. He picks up a pen flashlight and turns it on. "Just gonna check your eyes, yeah?"

She holds in her breath as Harry flashes the light in her eyes, the thumb over his other hand on her eyebrow. She stared into his beautiful eyes, but they remained focus. He kept the pen flashlight away, and put up numbers on his fingers, asking her to follow his finger.

"You're okay, no signs of concussion.", he sighs in relief. "And your wound doesn't need stitches, I can fix it up in two minutes."

"Harry we should talk about-"

"-You're hurt.", Harry tells her firmly. "We'll talk after I make sure you're gonna be okay."

She didn't protest. She flinched when he dabbed the cotton dipped in antiseptic on her broken skin, making it sting. "I know, I'm sorry..", Harry murmurs, gently holding her face. These were the same hands that roughed up the men, but now they were so gentle. He picked out little glass shards with tweezers, and she pulled her face away when it hurt.

"Shh..almost done, baby. Stay still for me.."

y/n sat there, caged between his legs, and watched his face as he treated her wound. She couldn't believe it. He was a completely different man when he fought them.

"That's it, you're all done. Nothing to worry about, that'll heal very soon." Harry gives her a small smile as he finishes applying an ointment and then bandages it.

"Thank you.", she nods.

"Of course. If they had hurt you any worse I would've-"

"-You would've what, Harry?", y/n finds her voice finally. "Y-You beat them to a pulp, they'll need to be hospitalized. T-There was blood."

Harry looks at her while he dries his hands after washing them. "What did you want me to do, y/n? They were hurting you!"

"S-Some of them..I-I knew some of them. I've seen them follow us around. W-Who are they?"

"I don't know.", Harry grumbles, while placing her back on the ground, and she grabs his hands, moving them away from her waist.

"Where did you learn to fight like that? H-How did you disarm them like that? Tell me Harry, please, who are they and why were they targeting you?"

"I said I don't know!", he snaps loudly, and y/n takes a step back, afraid of him. Harry curses, looking down at her feet. "Fuck, I'm sorry y/n, I-"

She steps further away when he tries to hold her hand. "Please tell me what you know, Harry.", she begs, tears running down her cheeks.

"I-I've seen them too.", Harry finally says. "I know they follow me around. There are more of them. But I don't know why. I honestly don't know, baby. I don't know why they don't let me go on with my life! I don't know why they tell me to remember stuff that I don't! I don't know how I can fight like that and I don't know why they're after me."

Harry looks into her eyes, desperate. "But I do know that I'll never hurt you. I felt so angry when I saw them touching you. I couldn't control myself. You mean a lot to me, and I'll never hurt you or stand back and watch as you get hurt, y/n. I would never put you in danger. I-I..I love you."

y/n crashes into his chest and he wraps his arms around her tight, pulling her as humanly close as possible. His warm big hands rub down her back, comforting her "I-I'm sorry for scaring you. E-Everything just burst out of me at that moment."

"T-They deserved it.", y/n admits, and Harry lets out a nervous chuckle, kissing the top of her head. "I will always protect you, sunshine."

y/n trusted him. His words were filled with emotion and she had seen how much he cares about her.

"We'll figure it out together, okay? All the missing pieces, we'll figure it out.", y/n tells him, holding his face and he nods. "I love you too, Harry." She kisses him before going back to hugging him. They would figure it all out.

____________________________________________________

"Just because I let you sleep yesterday doesn't mean you can sleep today!", y/n pokes Harry's ribs making him groan from his curled position in the passenger's seat.

"Talk to me unless you want me to crash us both into a tree.", y/n says, and he opens his eyes, squinting at her. "Aw, is my passenger princess angry?", she teases.

"Shut up.", Harry pouts at her, and she giggles. "I'll give you something to do. I need some rest too."

y/n pulls over, and Harry gives her a look. "Why are we stopping in the middle of nowhere?"

"For a switch. Your turn to drive.", she says, turning the engine off.

"No!"Harry's eyes widened. "I can't drive y/n! I won't sleep, but don't make me drive!"

"You do know how to drive! You have a license. Come on Harry, you can't be that bad. The road's empty, it's all yours.", y/n says, already getting out, and pulling Harry out of the other side. She opens the door for him and pushes him in despite his protests.

When y/n was settled, Harry looked over at everything, adjusting his seat. "Okay. You brought this upon yourself, sunshine. Seat belt on."

She pulls it over herself, and grins. "Let's go."

Harry changes the gear, and starts the car. "Okay, good start-"

y/n's voice cuts off as he changes the gear again, and stamps on the accelerator, speeding down the empty road.

"Oh my god. Harry!", her heart skips a beat as the air slaps against her face.

"I warned you.", Harry smiles, and then laughs. "I missed this!" "I wouldn't mind if you slowed down a bit-"

He only goes faster, and she squeaks, gripping onto the sides. "Don't worry, I got this.", Harry assures her, and she looks at him with wide eyes. "What else do you have hiding? Were you an F1 driver in the past?"

"That would be cool but I don't think so!", he laughs.

Hearing him laugh, and seeing his happiness, she broke into a laugh too. "You're a different breed altogether!"

"This car is amazing! Do we have to give it to that guy?!"

y/n laughs as she reaches to keep a hand on his knee. "I love you."

They sang at the top of their voices, enjoying the drive. "Do you know these routes?", y/n asks him, as he takes a left turn without cross checking with the map.

"Um, no, I just thought this is the better road.", he says.

"Huh. These roads were used for gold smuggling, illegal drug transport and things like that, apparently. They were used regularly a few years back, did you know?"

"Why would I know that random fact?"Harry raises an eyebrow.

"Just asking.", y/n shrugs, and changes the topic. They were planning on staying in Las Vegas for the night. They had found a hotel in the heart of the city, and they planned to spend some time there exploring before hitting the road a little later tomorrow.

Harry goes to take a shower once they get to their room, and y/n calls Uncle Luke. She was happy to know that he was doing perfectly fine. 

The room they got was beautiful, they had a big bed, and a beautiful view overlooking the city. Las Vegas was a party capital. They had to check out some of it.

y/n couldn't find her hair brush, and she thinks she might have kept it in Harry's bag, so she quickly goes through it. Sure enough, she had.

Just as she was about to pull out her hand, it landed on something cold, and heavy. y/n frowns and moves her fingers over it, and it was shaped like a..no way.

She pulls it out, and gasps in horror. Harry comes out of the bathroom at the same time. He looks at her as she stares in disbelief at the weapon she was holding.

"y/n, put that down.", Harry says calmly. "It's loaded."

A loaded gun.

"W-Why do y-you have a gun?", she asks shakily, dropping it. Harry quickly picks it up and puts it back in his bag. "Why were you looking through my bag?", he grumbles.

"Harry! That's not an answer.", y/n held his arms and looked into his eyes. "Tell me why you have a gun. Is that even yours?"

"Let it go baby-"

y/n pushes at his chest. "T-Tell me the truth please, Harry. Stop playing your games with me. Who are you?"

"I-I don't know.", Harry whispers, grabbing her hands and squeezing them when she tries to pull them out of his grip. "The gun is for safety. I told you that those men have been following me, and it's been going on for a long time. Before I even met you. I live alone y/n, what if all of them sneak up on me when I'm not expecting them to? That's why I have a gun. Yes, I shouldn't have brought it along and I should have told you. I'm sorry."

y/n wanted to believe him. "I-Is that the truth?"

"Yes, I promise.", Harry kisses her hand. "I'm not playing any game with you, y/n. It drives me crazy that I can't remember things. I wish I knew why all of this happens to me. You're the only normal thing in my life and you're the only person I have. I would never lie to you. You know who I am, you've seen who I am. I trust you sunshine, I've let you into my life because I trust you, and I love you. I wouldn't keep anything from you."

He pulls her into a hug, and she closes her eyes, holding on to him. She knew he was telling the truth. She was the one lying to him. She was breaking his trust. She was a monster.

"I-I need some air.", she whispers, pulling away from him.

"y/n please-"

"I have some things to think about Harry, please." She looks into his hurt eyes, before grabbing her phone and stepping out to the balcony. Harry didn’t want to let her go, but he understood that she needed some time alone.

y/n called Romania.

"Hello y/n, I was waiting for your call. How is-"

"-Romania, I'm done. I'm done with your memory game and I don't want your money. I can't do this for you."

"y/n what happened?"

"He's dangerous!", y/n whisper shouts. "He took down six big thugs all by himself yesterday and now, I found a gun in his bag."

"What?", Romania laughs. "He fought?"

"What the hell is so funny about that?", y/n snaps, so mad at her.

"Harry has not fought anyone since that incident, y/n! That means he's still in there. He was one of our best. He can take down anyone. Tell me what caused the fight."

y/n explained last night's event to her. "That is fantastic news y/n, that means he cares about you so much that he risked his mask coming off. Everyone who saw him there now knows that he's still someone to be feared. He must care deeply about you."

"A-And I care about him.", y/n whispers. "I know I'm in too deep now, but I can't keep hurting him by keeping this from him. I have to tell him."

"No! y/n you have two more days. I need you to get him to the location and then you're free to go, or tell him, or whatever you want to do. We will pay you double the amount. Please y/n, no one's got this close to him, you can get him to remember. Please. Reagen would want him to remember the memories they had together. He has to remember what happened that night."

y/n sighs, running her hand through her hair and she felt like pulling it out. She thought like Reagen. What would she do? She heard that she was extremely brave. However scared she must have felt deep down, Reagen wouldn't have given up. She probably died to save Harry. y/n couldn't let that sacrifice of love go to waste.

Harry had to remember.

"F-Fine..two more days.", y/n whispers.

"Harry won't hurt you y/n, trust me.", Romania said. "But if you feel unsafe, I can send my men to make sure you're safe."

"No it's okay, h-he, he won't hurt me.", y/n nods. "I'll call you later."

"Yeah. You got this, y/n, I'm-"

She hung up before hearing any more of her crap. How had she got herself into this fucking mess? y/n wasn't ready to face Harry yet, so she went down to the hotel's bar. She had to drink. She needed the alcohol to burn her emotions. She sat there by herself and tipped drink by drink down her throat.

Two days. Romania told her she'd be free to leave after that, but she was sure she couldn't just walk away without a scar. She had a feeling her life was going to turn upside down in those two days.

__________________________________________________________

Harry was jittery. He was sitting on the bed, knee bouncing with stress as he thought about everything. The last thing he wanted was to make y/n feel unsafe. He didn't know what to do. He wanted her to trust him. 

It had been too long since she walked away. Three hours. Harry worried about someone getting to her, someone hurting her. He was scared. He knew the world was full of bad people.

Harry takes his phone out and tries calling her. She doesn't answer.

"Fuck it.", he gets up, and he's tempted to stuff the gun into his pocket in case someone's got her, but he decided against it. That was only for emergencies.

Harry looked in the most obvious places first. He searched the restaurant, the rooftop DJ Party going on, and the bar.

He breathed a sigh of relief as he saw her sitting on a bar stool, sipping her drink and blabbering to the bartender.

"y/n.", Harry says as he approaches them.

"Oh hey Berty, meet my boyfriend! Harry, say hi to Berty!", y/n gives him a big grin, turning around on her stool to pat Harry's arm.

Harry looks at Berty, who gives him a small smile and a nod. "I was just going to ask her if there's someone to take her to her room, or back home if she's not staying here tonight."

"We're staying, and I'll take her. Thanks." Harry looks at y/n. Her eyes were dazed with the amount of alcohol she must have drowned, but she still looked gorgeous to Harry.

"Wait, Harry, have a drink with me, I haven't had one with you since that first week. Berty, get him a whiskey! The fiery kind!", y/n giggles, and pats the chair next to her. "Come sit, Harry."

Berty looks at Harry who shakes his head, and Berty nods, going away. "I don't want to have a drink now, love. Come on, it's late, you're sleepy."

"You don’t wanna have a drink with me?", y/n pouts at him, and his heart melts, so he sits down, but he doesn't ask for a drink. He knows that she is not a big drinker and he caused this now. He felt horrible about himself.

"I would love to have a drink with you sweetheart, but not now, okay? You've had a lot too, let me take you back to our room, okay?"

She nods, looking into his eyes. "Harry?"

Harry strokes her hair back, away from her face, nodding. "Tell me, babe."

"D-Do you..do you really love me?"

A small tear rolls down her cheek, and Harry's heart breaks. He cups her cheek, thumbing that tear away. Harry knew he had done horrible things, but if there was anything in his life that was steady, it was y/n. y/n showed him love, again. She was healing him.

"I do, I love you with all my heart, sunshine. I always have and I always will.", Harry whispers, pressing a soft kiss to her lips. "I'm so sorry for everything, I wish-", he stops talking, and words himself again. "I would never hurt you on purpose."

"I know, that's what I keep saying.", she says, nodding to herself.

"Saying to who?", he asks, confused.

"Romania. You smell good.", she says, smiling at him like he was the best thing that ever happened to her.

"We should go, y/n.", Harry motions to Berty. "Add her tabs to our room please, 401."

"Yes sir, have a good night y/n.", Berty waves at y/n and she laughs, waving back as Harry helps her off the chair and puts his arm around her waist.

"Good night Berty, live your life while you can. Don't be greedy for money, just be happy."

Harry wondered where that came from, while he walked with her out of the bar. He holds her hand tight in his, and keeps his eyes out for anyone following them or spying on them. She leans on him in the elevator, and he holds her close as she mumbles incoherently.

"What happened that night, Harry?", y/n asks, looking up at him.

"Which night, love?"

"On the night you were smuggling the gold? The night you had your accident and lost your memory? Do you remember?"

Harry freezes, and his nostrils flare angrily. He hates anyone asking him that. He was sick and tired of all the accusations he had heard about him.

"I-I don't remember.", he answers coldly. The elevator door opens, and he ushers her out and to their room.

"That's too bad.", y/n says. "I know you don't, but those thick heads don't understand! Woops!" y/n goes off her balance, and Harry grabs her before she can fall. "Careful. There’s another step, there you go." He leads her inside their room, and decides to just pick her up. He easily picks her up bridal style, and she grins, putting her arms around his neck.

"You are so strong, babe.", y/n pats his shoulder.

"You're not at all heavy.", Harry kisses her nose, taking them to the bedroom. He lays her down on the bed, and she pulls him down with her, yanking him by the shirt. "Let's have some fun.", she wiggles her eyebrows, like she was telling him a secret, and he couldn't help but laugh.

"Not now, darling. Tomorrow, okay?"

"You don't think I'm sexy?", she asks, and he kisses her sweetly. "I think you're very sexy, sunshine. You're drunk now, so we can mess around later. Let's just sleep now, we drove four hours."

Harry gets her some water and makes her drink it. "Do you know Oliver?", y/n asks him, as he takes the glass back.

"Oliver? No.", Harry says, while taking her shoes off.

"Oliver Khan.", y/n says. "Or so he says. I heard mafia people have different names, so I don't know."

"Mafia? What are you talking about y/n? One of your mystery movies?", Harry asks, taking her shirt off for her. She giggles. "I wish! It is kind of like that."

"Gonna slip your jeans off, yeah?"

"Uh huh.."

Harry's fingers brush her skin as he unbuttons her jeans, and pulls it down her smooth legs. "He was your best friend. Don't remember, do you?"

"No."

"What about Hans? Strike a bell?"

"No."

Harry unbuckles her bra, knowing she wouldn't want to sleep with it on. He slips one of his shirts over her body while listening to her.

"You were a mafia leader, Harry, you were good at everything. You were smuggling gold that day you had the accident. And your name isn't Harry Turner like you call yourself, it's Harry Styles."

Styles. A mafia leader. Harry wonders how she knows that. She does seem to be sure about that.

"What are you talking about y/n?", he leans closer, cupping her cheek. She smiles sleepily, rolling over on the bed. "I don't know either. I'm drunk as hell!"

"y/n. What mafia? What do you know?" Harry pats her cheek, but her eyes are already closed, and she is out like a light.

He would ask her when she's sober. She knew things about his past life. And he wanted to know what she knew, and why she was hiding them from him. She said they'd figure it out together, didn't she? Now, she was the one keeping secrets.

__________________________________________________

y/n wakes up with a massive hangover headache, and groans, turning over and burying her face into the pillow. What had happened? y/n tries to remember what got her into this hangover misery and then she wishes all of it never happened. How was she in bed now? Did Harry come and get her?

She looks beside her and sees an empty bed. The sheets were rumpled, so Harry had slept here, but he wasn't here now. Or was it even their room? Where was she? She sits up and looks around. Yes, she saw her bag, it was their room.

"Harry?", she calls, hoping he would answer. She had made peace with the fact that he had a gun. And like Romania said, it was good. He is showing parts of his old self and it's only a matter of time before he remembers everything.

Harry appears, holding a cup. She thought it's her coffee, and smiled but it quickly disappeared. "Water?", she looks up at him when he hands it to her.

"You're dehydrated.", he murmurs, without looking at her. "Ibuprofen's there if you have a headache."

She found the pill beside her on the bedside table, and took it, washing it down with the water. "Thank you. Did you um get me to bed?"

"Don’t remember?", he asks, and she scoffs, it's usually her asking him that question.

"No, I don't. Last thing I remember is talking to Berty about his date...um, I thought about it Harry. I understand why you have a gun, I just needed some time."

Harry nods, sitting down on the bed, looking away from her. "What’s the matter? Are you okay?", she asks, frowning, noticing how he didn't spare her a glance yet.

"I'm hungry, breakfast closes in an hour.", he grumbles.

"Oh. Give me just one second to look a little presentable and we'll go." y/n gets off the bed, and kisses Harry's cheek before going into the bathroom.

They go to breakfast, and eat in silence. y/n was used to Harry being quiet, but he would hold her hand or keep his hand on her thigh, brush his shoulder with hers, he would do something. He did none of those today, and he seemed to be in deep thought as he ate. y/n worried whether she had said something to him last night. She doesn't remember one bit of her drunk rambling. Or was he mad that she ruined the one night they had in Vegas?

Probably everything. She kept quiet too. She deserved it.

Back in their room, Harry got some work calls and y/n laid in bed, watching him. She couldn't let him give her the silent treatment for any longer, she had a task to do and it won't work if both of them remain quiet. y/n loves talking and hates silence.

"Harry, talk to me. I'm sorry for running away like that.", y/n pipes up when he was done with the call.

"It was not  safe.", he murmured.

"I was around people, it was safe. I didn't go out of the hotel either. Why do you think it wasn't safe? Did you see those guys again?"

Harry walks over to plug his phone for charging. "No. I don't know, they could've been there."

y/n slowly nods. "I didn't think about that. We still have some time before hitting the road, wanna go check out the streets?"

Harry sighs, finally looking at her. "I don't wanna travel anymore. I want to go back."

"Why?", y/n asks, reaching for his hand. "Harry-"

"-Harry Styles.", he says, making her freeze. Did he remember his real last name?

"You said I'm Harry Styles, yesterday.", he completes. "Something about the mafia, and Oliver Khan. How do you know those things about me?"

His green eyes bore into hers, and she was speechless. Shit. Had she drunk blabbered all that? Had she told him everything? About the money and the deal with Romania?

"Tell me, y/n. Are those true?"

She couldn't tell him the full truth just yet, but she could tell him some of it. She nods.

He groans, running a hand through his hair. "How do you know? And tell me everything you know, right now."

"I um one of my friends recognized you, and they told me all this information about you."

"What friend?"

"Um, T-Tony?"

"What does Tony do?"

"He um...he's in the media.", she stumbles out another lie. There was no Tony.

"I need his number, I want to ask him myself.", Harry tells her, making her sweat.

"I'm not sure if I have his number-"

"Isn't he your friend?" Harry looked angry now, and that's the last thing y/n wanted.

"Was, not anymore. I'll find out his number, okay? I'll uh tell you what I know in the meantime."

Harry nods, not even blinking as he listens to her. y/n told him everything she knew. "R-Reagen died that day..but you lived. T-That's the story.", she completes.

She studies Harry's face which appeared expressionless, then he buries his face in his hands. "I don't remember any of that, y/n."

"I-It might not be true, Harry, that's the story I know.", y/n rubs his back gently. "I-I'm a doctor, I don't do all that stuff..", he whispers. y/n scoots closer to him and hugs him tight. She knew that. She knew Harry in front of her wouldn't do all that.

"That's why those men were following you and they're all scared of you Harry. Even if you get back a small piece of who you were, they don't stand a chance against you.", she speaks softly. He looks up at her, eyes watery. "A-Are you scared of me too? Is that why you kept all this from me?"

"No, I just didn't want to upset you.", y/n cups his face. "I'm not scared of you Harry, I never was and I never will be. You saved me. I know you'll never hurt me. I feel safe in your arms, I feel loved. I know who you are. You're a brave and kind man. No matter what I hear, that's what I'll believe, okay?"

Harry buries his head into her neck, and she wraps her arms around him, cupping the back of his head. "I love you and my feelings are real. That will never change."

"I-I love you too.", Harry whispers. She held him while he processed everything. She made sure to tell him that it might just be a stupid story with zero truth in it. y/n still hadn't told him everything, but she would, in time.

"You trust me?", Harry asks her, and she nods, kissing him. "I trust you."

Harry pulls her onto his lap as they kiss, y/n's hands moving to his hair. His lips attacked hers roughly and desperately. She feels him getting hard, and starts moving, straddling his lap, making him groan. 

"Let me make you feel good, Harry.", she whispers as she tugs his shirt off. She had to distract him from thinking more into Tony or anything else, she didn't want him to get worked up. Harry's hand grabs the back of her neck, pulling her lips away from his. "Get on your knees."

y/n bites her lip, getting off of his lap. She loves when he gets dominant in bed. Maybe it's because she's so busy and in charge of her life, she likes to be manhandled and thrown around a bit in bed. It's like a stress buster. And sex with Harry always feels so good.

y/n gets on her knees on the floor as Harry takes off his pants and sits back down on the bed. y/n palms him through his boxers, and he sucks in a breath. "Go on, take me out."

y/n obeys, her fingers slipping inside the waist band of his boxers, and slowly pulling them down his legs. "You're so big.", she murmurs, admiring his thick, long, dick. She wonders how that fits inside her.

Harry smirks, looking at her as she takes his dick in her hand, stroking it from it's base to the top, dangerously slow. Her other hand played with his balls, squeezing them ever so gently. 

"You're such a tease.", he says, looking down at her. "Wait. Take off everything except your panties."

"Whatever you say.", she pulls away to take her top off, leaving her upper half bare. She hadn't worn a bra. She slipped of her shorts as well, leaving just her panties as he asked. Her nipples were hard, and Harry groaned at the sight of her on his knees for him, ready to pleasure him. He leans down to cup one of her breasts and squeezes. "Are you gonna be a good girl and take this big cock down your throat?"

Harry's eyes were dark with lust, and y/n moans, "Y-Yes, Harry."

"Get to work.", he says, sitting back up. She keeps her eyes on him as she spits on his dick, and rubs it all over. He groans, hands going to hold her hair up for her.

y/n teases him at first, slowly running her tongue along his length, while her hands palm his balls. She leaves little kisses on his dick. Harry was getting painfully hard and frustrated.

"Okay that's enough, put me inside your mouth or I'm going to do it myself.", Harry mutters, not able to handle the teasing anymore. She takes him in her mouth and he lets her adjust, trying hard not to just push it down her throat.

"That's a good girl.", he coos, and curses as she bobs her head up and down his length. "Fuck."

She was driving him crazy. Her pretty lips wrapped around his cock, her gorgeous eyes looking up at him like she only wanted to please him, that was enough to drive Harry over the edge. She moves her head further down, gagging around him, her eyes watering but she loves it. 

"Oh bloody hell, that feels so good. Are you gagging around me, baby?", Harry moans. She knew how badly he wanted to just have his way with her. She pulls out. "Fuck my mouth.", she tells him. 

"Beg for it.", he says, continuing to stroke his dick as she stops. He pinches one of her nipples, and she clenches her thighs together. She was getting so wet. "P-Please Harry, fuck my mouth."

"That's not good enough, try harder baby.", Harry rolls her nipple between his thumb and forefinger. 

"Please make me gag. Make me choke on your big dick, Harry. Use my mouth as you please."

Harry moves both of his hands back to her hair. "You're so fucking hot. Tap my thigh if it gets too much, alright?"

"Yes.", y/n smiles, opening her mouth wide for him, making her jaw go slack. "Your throat's gonna to be sore by the time I'm done with you, darling. You asked for it.", he says before thrusting his dick into his mouth.

y/n chokes as his dick touches the back of her throat, and she feels the sting on her scalp as he moves her head up and down by her hair. He pulls her away to give her a second to breathe, before pushing it back in her mouth, keeping her head still as he moves his hips. Saliva drips down her chin. 

"So f-fucking good for me.", he moans, legs starting to shake as he feels him getting close. He pushed her head down, and tears run down her cheeks as she gags around him, her nose buried into his hound. 

"Just like that, baby, your mouth feels s-so good. I-I'm going to cum."

He pulls her head up. "F-Fuck..."

"G-Give it to me Harry, cum for me.", she whispers, her voice coming out hoarse. Harry strokes his dick, and she opens her mouth to catch his cum as it shoots out. She hums, tasting him on her tongue. 

"Keep your mouth open.", he groans and moves his dick to paint some of his cum over  her chest. y/n sits like a perfect girl, tears running down her cheeks, mouth open holding his cum, and her beautiful breasts covered in his cum as well.

"You look so pretty like this.", Harry strokes her hair. "Swallow."

She does, and shows him her empty mouth. He grabs her jaw to see. "Good girl."

She smiles, pleased with his praise. Her fingers scoop up the rest of his cum on her body and brings it back to her lips, cleaning it off, all while looking at him. "Tastes so good.", she tells him.

"Yeah? Stand up, baby." 

She raises on her legs, and he pulls her in between his knees. He taps her thigh and she separates them. Harry's fingers touch her wet core through her thin panties. "Did you get so wet from gagging on my cock, y/n?"

"Uh huh..", she's tempted to close her legs. "All for you."

Harry hums, tugging on her wrist. "Bend over my lap, let me take a good look at that beautiful pussy."

She listens, bending over his thighs and Harry adjusts her so her ass is propped up and her feet are dangling. 

Harry's hands go to her panties, and he rips them apart. "Oh god.", y/n moans. Everything he did was so hot. "I liked that.", she pouts, her poor panties.

"Sorry baby, I'll buy a new one.", Harry grins, throwing the cloth pieces away after ripping it in half. He spreads her cheeks apart, looking at her glistening pussy. "You're dripping, sweetheart. Oh, look at all that sweetness."

"Please Harry.", she whines as his fingers stroke over her folds, feeling the moisture. 

"You want my fingers? My mouth?", he asks, enjoying her being a mess for him. 

"A-Anything, please." She starts to use his thigh, moving down on it to cause some friction and yelps as his hand comes down on her bottom. "Did I tell you to move?"

"No, sorry.", she moans. "More, please."

"More? You like it when I slap your ass, baby?", he asks, giving her another slap. He groans, watching her ass jiggle from the hit. 

"Fuck, yes.." She gasps as he spanks her again. She loved the pain, and as the sting faded away, she was only left with pleasure. Harry's hand smoothed over the sting, before he thrust his fingers inside her pussy without warning, making her let out a scream and hold on to his legs for support. "P-please, please..", she begs, as he spreads her legs with his knee.

He pulled his fingers away to give her ass another swat, making her whimper. She was getting dizzy from all the pleasure. "Feels good, doesn't it? You gonna cum, baby?"

"Y-Yes, yes..oh.." His fingers curl around her g-spot and she's a mess on his lap as she tries to lay still. It felt so good. "Come on, cum for me.."

y/n's sure she's seen stars, as Harry helps her through her orgasm. All the blood was rushing to her face as she was dangling on his lap. Harry notices and places a pillow beside him, before bringing her up so her head's laying on the pillow. He also lifts her legs and lays them on the bed. 

Harry brings his fingers to his lips, tasting her. "So sweet, baby."

He takes some of it dripping out of her, bringing it to her lips. "Here, clean my fingers, darling."

y/n's lips wrap around his fingers as she sucks on them. He pulls his fingers out of her mouth and brings it back to her pussy, making her whimper.

"What? Is your little pussy sensitive already?", Harry chuckles. "Okay, I'll give you a few minutes. How bout I play with your other hole?"

She gasps as he spreads her cheeks with one hand, and circles his finger over her asshole. She grips onto the sheets, letting out a small whine. "I will fuck you in this little hole one day. I bet it'll be tight like your pussy."

He pushes his finger into her asshole, and she moans at the new feeling. "Harry.."

"So tight, and pretty." He spits on her hole, and pushes his finger back in. "Would you like that baby? I'll fill all your holes up, and you'll take it, won't you?"

"Yes, yes I will. Please." She whines when he pulls his finger out, and he laughs. "Not today, you're very tight and we don't have lube. I don't want it to hurt. Some other time, huh, baby?"

He sits her up on his lap. "I want you to ride me. Your tits look so pretty and perky today, I want them bouncing on my face."

She looks at his dick which was hard again, standing up straight. "That's what you do to me.", he says, and she grins, placing her hands on his shoulders as she gets comfortable. Harry holds her hips, and guides them over him as she sinks down on him slowly. 

y/n moans, feeling him deep inside of her. Harry moves one hand from her hip to her clit, his thumb rubbing slow circles over her sensitive bud of nerves, as she starts moving. 

"F-Fuck, Harry..", y/n's body over flows with pleasure. "Let me hear how much you like it, baby.", Harry says, watching her breasts bounce up and down as she rides him.

"G-God it feels so g-good, so good."

Her thighs were burning, and her body was tingling. His dick felt so good inside her, and if he kept up with her clit rubs, she was going to cum again within minutes. Harry takes one of y/n's nipples into his mouth, sucking on it. 

"H-Harry I'm gonna-"

"-Already? I think you can hold it for a bit.", he tells her, teeth grazing against her nipple as he looked up at her. y/n moans, trying to keep her pace, but she slowed down. Her thighs were burning and shaking with too much pleasure. 

"Be a good girl for me.", Harry murmurs. "You're my dirty little slut, aren't you?"

She yelps as his hand slaps her ass before squeezing the stinging flesh. "Y-Yes.." She tried to move, but she couldn't. "Harry.."

"What's wrong baby? My cock too much for you?", he teases.

"P-Please fuck me, please.", she begs. 

"Since you asked so nicely.", he grins, grabbing her hips again.

Her fingers curled around his shoulders and she screamed as he thrust his hips, hard and fast. She was almost falling off his lap. 

"You can cum, baby.", he tells her, and her eyes roll back in her head as she lets go. Harry fucks her through her orgasm and it hurts from over sensitivity before it feels good again, Harry doesn't stop. "W-Who's making you feel so good?"

y/n couldn't answer. Harry brings one hand to wrap around her throat. "I asked you a question."

"Y-You. You, Harry..", she moans, and her vision goes blurry as his fingers press against the sides of her throat. He was driving her crazy. "T-That's right."

y/n looked so divine, covered in sweat, cum, and tears as she bounced on his cock. Harry released inside her soon, and she cums again. She slumps on him, exhausted and he wraps his arms around her before falling back on the bed, letting her lay on top of him.

They breathe heavily, taking a moment to recover, before y/n looks up at him. Harry smiles at her, stroking her hair back gently, before taking her chin and bringing her close for a kiss. "T-That was crazy.", she whispers. "I can't feel my legs."

Harry laughs, running his hand down her back. "I'm sure it'll be fine after a nice warm shower and a small nap."

"I do need a shower, but you might have to carry me inside."

"With pleasure.", he nods, and kisses her nose. "I love you, sunshine."

"I love you too, H.", she squeezes her arms around his waist. "You're perfect."

After a few minutes of laying down and catching their breath, Harry carries y/n to the shower,  holding her under the warm water. He mumbles praises against her skin as he washes her, and she tangles her hands into his hair as she massages the shampoo into his locks. It was very relaxing. 

So relaxing, that Harry let his mind wander. y/n kisses his chin, looking at him fondly as she continues to wash his hair.

"What's on your mind?", she asks, after a few minutes.

Harry turns the water back on, running his hands through his hair as he washed the shampoo out. "I was thinking about everything you told me. She's not dead, y/n."

"W-Who's not dead?", y/n asks, although she feared the answer.

"Reagen. She didn't die."

y/n felt like throwing up.

"They were in love. Love like you've never seen before. Harry would do anything and everything for her.", Romania's words ring in her ear. Reagen wasn't afraid of anything. She didn't have anyone. Harry was her world."

Maybe Harry was starting to remember things, and his mind didn't want to believe that his love was dead.

"H-Harry, I'm sorry but, Reagen is dead.", y/n says slowly, rubbing his arm. "Only you survived after that night-"

"-No.", Harry cuts her off, staring right into her eyes. "Reagen's alive, y/n. I don't know where she is, but I know that she's not dead. Things..they're coming back to me."

[zegrasdrysdale]

Could you write a smut with Ethan Edwards like after a bad game or something? Thankssss!!

[ make me forget ] e. edwards

paring : Ethan Edwards x fem!reader

summary : Ethan confides in his girlfriend after a rough loss in the Frozen Four

warning(s) : smut ! very much more love making than fucking, unprotected sex (don’t be silly, wrap your willy), p in v sex, blowjob, use of nicknames during sex (pretty girl, baby, etc.), little bit of dirty talk

author’s note : waited until the umich season ended before i tackled this request because if they had lost in the frozen four (which they did), i thought it would be the perfect plot for this request. the way they lost was really rough so be prepared for sad ethan for a lil bit

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Her heart breaks when the final buzzer goes off. Boston College is quick to celebrate their four-to-nothing win over Michigan. Her eyes are on Ethan as he stands with Dylan and Tyler while the Duke boys shed some tears.

The tears that begin to fall down Ethan's cheeks while he stands with his teammates are her last straw. The tears that threatened to spill over onto her cheeks begin to roll. She quickly wipes them away so Ethan doesn't look over and see them.

All of the Michigan boys huddle near the bench as they watch another team move onto the finals for the third year in a row.

It breaks her heart that they have fought so hard for the past three years and no national title to show for it. They deserve it more than they know or realize at the moment.

Michigan shakes hands with Boston College at center ice before BC goes back to the locker room to celebrate the win. The Michigan boys raise their sticks for the last time this season, and for the last time for some of the boys. She shows her support by clapping and banging on the glass in front of her as they head down the tunnel.

Ethan looks at her as he waits to go down the tunnel. She shoots him a small smile that's mixed with fondness and sadness. If he smiles back at her, she can't see it because of the way his helmet sits on his head. His face is shiny and she can’t tell if it’s because he’s sweating or if it’s because he’s been crying.

Hopefully it’s because he’s been sweating because she doesn’t know if she can handle more tears from Ethan.

She makes her way to the hotel that she and the other girlfriends are staying at, which is also the hotel that the boys are staying at. None of them are really in the mood to hang around the arena to wait for their boyfriends.

Ethan knows her room number. It just might be a little bit because he comes knocking. He’s going to shower then spend some time with his teammates because this is the last time that Team 102 will be Team 102.

Some of his teammates are going to sign with their NHL team. She knows Frank is going to the NHL immediately like Luke did last year. He’ll sign within a day or two after they get back to Michigan. Dylan and Gavin have both said they’re probably going to sign with their teams too. A handful of other guys haven’t made an official decision yet but she’s sure that more will be leaving.

Then it’ll just be Ethan and Mark left from their class that came in almost four years ago.

Once she’s back in her hotel room that’s a few blocks from the arena, she finally relaxes. She pulls off the hat she was wearing as well as Ethan’s Michigan jacket. With a sigh, she flops onto her back on the bed.

If she’s feeling like this, she can’t even begin to imagine how the boys are feeling. It sucks that they’re not moving onto the finals after getting shutout. It especially sucks that it’s now three years in a row that they’ve made it to the Frozen Four and haven’t been to the finals.

Like she said, she can’t even begin to imagine how the boys are feeling after that game.

It’s nearly two hours after the game ends when there’s a very soft knock on her door. If she was sleeping or had in her AirPods then she wouldn’t have heard it. The TV is playing at a low volume so she was able to hear the knock.

When she swings the door open, she sees a very upset Ethan Edwards on the other side.

She pouts and pulls him into a hug, which pulls him into the room. The door swings shut behind Ethan. “I’m so sorry, Eddie,” she softly says into his ear. “I wish I could do something.”

“I know,” he replies. His voice is hoarse like all he’s been doing is crying. It breaks her heart a little more. “Needed to see you. I tried slipping away but coach made us stay for a little bit after we were all showered.”

She pulls back from the hug, leaving her arms draped around his neck. Ethan’s avoiding eye contact with her. It’s what he does when he’s upset.

When she pushes his hair out of his face, he leans down and puts his forehead on her shoulder. Her fingers find a home in his damp locks and holds him. His arms wrap around her waist.

“I’m so tired of feeling like this,” Ethan confesses after a few moments of silence. “It’s been three fucking years. First it was Denver, then it was Quinnipiac, and now it’s Boston College. Three years, three different teams. I’m tired.”

“I know, E,” she coos as she presses a kiss to his temple. “I can’t even begin to imagine how you feel. I know how rough it’s been for you and the guys.”

Ethan lifts his head up and finally looks at her. All she sees behind his eyes is sadness. She has to bite her lip from crying because his eyes are usually so bright. They are so dark right now.

“I have one more year,” he says. “One. I don’t think I can handle it if I’m in this position again next year. I probably won’t sign with the Devils this season so I can do this for one more year but I don’t think I can do this again. Feel like this again.”

She watches tears spill over his eyelids onto his cheeks. She dries his cheeks with her thumbs and gives him the smallest of smiles. “You’re going to lead your team to a national title next year as a senior, E,” she assures him. “It’s your year.”

Ethan nods without saying a word, but the way her eyes flicker to her lips tells her everything she needs to know. He grabs her hands off his face and loosely laces their fingers together.

“Can you do me a favor?” Ethan asks. She raises her eyebrows in confusion. “Can you just … help me forget for a little bit? I need to get my mind off of the last few hours.”

She blinks, not even surprised at his request. “Ethan, you are upset right now and you’re allowed to be,” she begins to say to him. “I just don’t want to take advantage of you since you’re not in the right mindset.”

He drops his forehead to hers. His eyes close. “Please, baby,” he whispers. “Make me forget. I need you to make me forget.”

It’s not like she was going to say no. She just needed to make sure it’s what he really wanted before she started something.

Ethan picks his head up and meets her eyes. She glances between them to make sure he’s okay before she pulls him down into a kiss.

The kiss starts out soft and slow but quickly turns rough and needy. Ethan’s hands rest on her sides and he lightly grips her waist so she can’t move away. Not that she was planning on going anywhere.

If Ethan wants her to help him forget the last few hours then she will.

She presses herself flush against Ethan’s chest and can feel the growing bulge against her thigh. Her fingers curl in his locks to keep him from breaking the kiss. She does walk forward a bit so Ethan’s back is pressed against the wall next to the door.

Her hands snake down from his hair and down his chest until they rest on the waistband of his dress pants. Ethan sucks her bottom lip between his teeth and pulls back, letting her lip snap back into place. She looks up at him and bites the same lip.

“You’re hot when you’re needy,” she tells Ethan as she begins to undo the button on his pants. “Just so you’re aware.”

“You’re hot all the time,” Ethan retorts as she finally gets the button undone. “Especially when you wear my clothes.” His comment confirms he saw her in his jacket during the game.

She just smiles at him and untucks his shirt from his pants before pulling him into another kiss.

Ethan pulls off the suit jacket he’s wearing and lets it fall to the floor. His hands come up to cup her jaw as he returns her kisses, each one getting needier and deeper.

After a few more kisses, she reluctantly pulls back. She notices how swollen and red his lips already are and she can’t help but smile at the sight of how disheveled he already looks.

Once she takes him all in, she sinks down to her knees in front of him. Ethan leans his head back and mumbles a “fuck” as she pulls his dress pants down so they pool around his ankles. His boxers are next and his semi pops out. Ethan ends up kicking the clothes away as well as his shoes.

She takes him in her hand and pumps him a few times. “Shit, baby,” Ethan breathes out. “You look so pretty on your knees for me.”

She sends him a smile before she wraps her lips around the reddening tip. Slowly, she takes his dick in her mouth and looks up at him. Ethan runs his fingers through her hair and pushes a loose piece behind her ear so her face is clear.

For once, she loves being able to do this for Ethan. He’s always focused on her pleasure and making sure that she is taken care of. She gets to return the favor. It’s not very often she gets to do this for him.

One of her hands rests on his thigh and the other slides up under his button-up. Her hand rests on his stomach for a moment before sliding as close to his chest as she can get. His hand rests on hers over his shirt.

She moves her head and sucks gently, being cautious of her teeth. She still gets flashbacks to the first time she blew him sometimes when her teeth accidentally got involved and there was almost a hospital trip that night.

Honestly, it’s probably why he rarely lets her blow him at this point in their relationship. It was a year before he let her try again.

Ethan’s hips roll slowly and he hits the back of her throat. She relaxes her jaw and throat as he begins to fuck her face. Soft pants pass Ethan’s lips as she hollows out her cheeks and lightly sucks. Her tongue swirls around his tip every so often.

“Baby, you keep doing that and I’m going to come before either of us are ready,” Ethan tells her.

She pulls off his dick with a pop and licks her lips. “Then we better move to the bed,” she replies as she stands up. “So you can fuck me instead of coming from a blowjob against a wall.”

Ethan’s eyes widen and he crashes their lips together. He hums softly and begins to walk toward the bed. She loses her t-shirt and her leggings are around her knees when she falls onto her back. The kiss breaks and she stares up at him.

He unbuttons his shirt and she pulls off her leggings. She is left in her bra and panties, but she’ll let Ethan take them off because it’s one of his favorite things to do when they have sex.

She moves back on the bed until her head hits the pillows. A completely naked Ethan crawls onto the mattress until he’s settled between her bent knees. One of his hands cups her jaw and he instigates a soft kiss. She wraps her hand around his wrist.

“I love you,” she mumbles. “I’ve loved you from year one and I’ll love you after next year. No matter what.”

Ethan smiles against her lips and she can’t help but smile against his. He pulls back and meets her eyes. “I love you,” he tells her. “I love that you’re here. It can’t be easy for you either.”

She shakes her head and traces Ethan’s cheekbones and jaw with thee fingers. “It sucks seeing you guys come so close and not getting the championship,” she admits. “I hate seeing you so upset, Eddie. It breaks my heart.”

“Gonna win one next year,” Ethan tells her as he leans in and presses kisses to her jaw. “For you. I’m gonna raise that trophy for you, baby.”

She smiles and wraps her arms around his neck. “Good,” she giggles. “You’d look hot with that trophy above your head.”

Ethan laughs and pulls back to look at her. His hair falls into his face as he looks down at her. “Then I’m definitely winning it,” he replies as she pushes his hair out of his face. “Right now though, I need to get you naked and get inside of you.”

He pulls her up so she is sitting up with her legs wrapped around his waist. She laughs when he reaches around her and unhooks her bra. He throws it to the floor before he kisses her. She falls back so her head hits the pillows again.

Ethan hovers over her and slithers a hand between them until it slides into her panties. He cups her core and she gasps against his mouth. “Eddie,” she breathes out.

“I’ve got you, baby,” he tells her. “Such a good girl for me being so wet. You want me that bad?”

She nods and whines when Ethan plays with her clit. “I wanna ride you,” she tells him. “Help you forget the game tonight like you want me to.”

He pulls back from the kiss and meets her eyes. “Yeah?” he asks. “Wanna ride me, pretty girl?”

With an eager nod, she manages to flip them over so she is straddling Ethan’s thighs. Ethan stares up at her with a shocked look on his face as she runs her hands from his stomach to his chest. “Let me take care of you, E,” she tells him. “Make you feel good.”

Ethan nods with his wide eyes.

She pulls her panties off, the lace ruined from how wet she was before she pulled them off. She straddles Ethan’s waist once she’s completely naked. His hands run up and down her sides for a second while she leans down and kisses his jaw.

After a second of this, she gets on her knees and grabs his dick. She lines him up with her entrance and Ethan’s hand rests on her waist. She slowly sinks down on his dick with a sigh.

No mather how many times they do this, she is still shocked with how big he is as he fills her up. She’ll never get over how he manages to fit inside of her every time.

She drops her head back as she slowly fills herself with Ethan’s dick. “That’s it, baby,” Ethan says. “You take my cock so well. Look so pretty sitting on my cock.”

She sucks her bottom lip into her mouth as Ethan bottoms out inside of her. His words shoot straight to her core. Ethan traces her sides for a second before he helps her begin to roll her hips. She sighs as he moves in and out of her.

“Fuck,” she gasps as she moves her hip. “Eddie.”

One of Ethan’s hands snakes between them and rubs her clit. She lets out a soft moan as Ethan works her close to an orgasm.

The bed creaks below them as she picks up speed. Her hands rest on his chest to keep her balance. Ethan’s lips are parted and his eyes are closed as she rides his dick.

It’s not a minute later when Ethan wraps his arms around her waist and rolls until he’s hovering over her. She looks up at him and smiles. Ethan mirrors the smile and slowly begins to roll his hips into her.

His dick moves in and out of her slowly, and deeply with the new angle. He hooks one of her legs over his shoulders so he can move as deep into her as he can.

Her fingers find a home in Ethan’s locks and pulls him down into a kiss. His movements remain slow and deep as he fucks her.

This doesn’t feel like fucking though. To her, it feels like more than that.

Ethan presses soft kisses to her wrists as he moves. She stares up at him and notices the soft look on his face. He looks almost relaxed.

“I love you,” Ethan softly pants. “So much, baby. I’m so lucky.”

“I’m so- ah- lucky,” she replies. “I’m so in love with you, E. Fuck.”

His speed picks up slightly and his thrusts get sloppy. He is close and she knows it.

She pushes the hair out of his face and pulls him down for a kiss. They both pant and groan as they get closer to their orgasms.

Her legs begin to shake and she feels the familiar knot in the pit of her stomach. Ethan’s fingers finding their way back to her clit almost undoes the knot. She cries out against Ethan’s lips.

“Come on my cock, baby,” Ethan mumbles against her lips. “Right behind you.”

“Come inside of me, Eddie,” she pants. “It’s okay. You know I’m on the pill.”

Ethan’s thrusts have slowed but he slams into her. She cries out a second later and clenches around Ethan’s dick. Her head is thrown back against the pillows and she cries his name. Her fingers dig into the skin on his back.

He shoots into her after a couple more thrusts. “Fuck,” he groans.

Her entire body melts into the mattress beneath her. Her breathing is labored as Ethan collapses on top of her. He lifts her head up and they share lazy kisses until he pulls out of her to clean her up.

She can’t move. Her body feels like jelly but the warm cloth feels good on her core and thighs. She whimpers as the cloth brushes over her sensitive core.

Ethan crawls back onto the bed and pulls the blankets on top of them. She manages to move so she can curl up against his side. She traces lazy shapes into his chest.

Silence fills the room, and it’s okay because she loves just being with Ethan.

Then a question rises in her head and she can’t resist asking. Especially when she knows that some of his teammates are leaving.

“Are you going to sign with the Devils?” she asks as she lifts her head. “It’s okay if you are. You know I’ll come to all the games that are closer to Mich-”

“I’m coming back for my senior year, baby,” he interrupts. “The Devils can wait. Shea is waiting too so it’s okay. We’re going to go together. You can’t get rid of me yet.”

She smiles and presses a soft kiss to his lips before she settles in for the night and falls asleep minutes later.

༺═──────────────═༻

MASTERLIST

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[schlattslambo]

for goodness sake | schlatt 18+

a/n: inspired and dedicated to @blaineandergel . thank you my friend

is this edited? no. was this written while im at work? yes. please enjoy. i tried to make this as gender neutral as possible. if theres anything i can do to improve on that front, please let me know! ❤️

————-

you weren’t sure when the whimsy of christmas came back, but as you stepped back from putting the final ornament on the tree, it was swirling around in the air alongside cinnamon and apple.

the tree was fluffy and looked soft from a distance. with the twinkling lights and generic ornaments, it looked even better. soft christmas music played on a record player on the mantle, where your boyfriend was fastening stockings.

christmas wasn’t much of a celebration once you grew up and moved out. it was more of an excuse to eat ham and stromboli and sneak cookie dough as your mother baked cookies whenever you visited their house. this year was different.

this year, you were spending your first christmas together with your boyfriend, a youtuber named schlatt. you’d met him through a mutual friend and hit it off instantly. at first, your relationship was secret. fans had noticed a brightness in schlatt’s eyes that wasn’t there before and began questioning it.

eventually, fans assumed that he was seeing someone. with that assumption, a bit of hate was spewed whenever someone brought up the fact. you let the hate fall off your shoulders, mainly because nobody would see this side of schlatt. the side that was wearing matching christmas pajamas and humming along to frank sinatra.

a soft, loving smile tugs at the corner of your lips as jambo waltzes in, red and green collar jingling. schlatt stands back and admires his handiwork of the mantle as you snake your arms around his waist. he smiles down at you, heart warm.

“hey there baby.” he says, turning around and placing a kiss on your forehead.

“you did a really good job with the fireplace.” you say softly, nuzzling your face against his chest.

“thank you,” schlatt replies with a smile. “i’m gonna light a fire, what do you think?”

you smile. “baby, it’s not cold enough for that.”

“and?” schlatt asks. “it’s romantic.”

you roll your eyes but allow schlatt to putz outside and grab some wood from the pile on the porch. this man absolutely loves that fireplace and would have a fire lit all the time if he could.

you pour yourself a glass of wine and watch as schlatt lights the fire. it crackles to life and he smiles proudly. he’ll never say it, but this kind of thing is what keeps him going. the domestic side of your relationship. him working hard and you just sitting there looking cute. in this case, you curled up on the couch with your wine and him cracking open a beer.

as schlatt sits down next to you, you snuggle into him instantly. his arm goes around you just as it always does and the two of you admire the decorations. the twinkling of the lights on the tree, the four stockings hung on the mantle (two for the cats, of course), and the fire all bring a warm feeling in your chest.

you both sit quietly, watching as jambo lays down in front of the fire place, squirming onto his back so he warms his belly. the scene is out of a christmas card and you couldn’t be happier.

————-

a little while later, the wine has made your cheeks flush and schlatt has switched to sipping on some whiskey. you’ve gotten through half of the bottle of white wine and you’re feeling frisky. it doesn’t matter that frank is still playing on the record player; you want schlatt and you want him now.

your hand goes to schlatt’s thigh as he scrolls on his phone, probably responding to an email. he barely notices until you start moving your hand up closer to his crotch.

“what’re you doin’?” he asks, smiling at you.

“baby,” you draw out.

schlatt peeks over at you and notices your flushed cheeks. he smiles, taking a swig of his drink before placing the glass down.

“what’s up?” schlatt asks, turning to face you. “what do you need?”

you jut your bottom lip out and peek up at him. “you.” you whisper.

your hand goes to his crotch and you begin to feel him through his pants. his cock grows hard and he allows you to touch him for a bit before gripping your wrist. if he doesn’t stop you, he’ll end up cumming in his pants like a teenager. he’s not gonna let that happen again.

“behave.” he grits.

“why?” you pout. “i need you.”

schlatt looks at you, pupils blown and cheeks flushed. he looks into your eyes, knowing that if he doesn’t stand his ground, you’re going to be a brat again. ignoring the fact that you were told to behave, you sit in schlatt’s lap.

“baby,” he sighs, breath catching in his throat as you bite at his neck, his weak spot. “we just finished decorating.”

you don’t respond verbally, only grinding your hips down. you feel schlatt’s cock harden even further under you, and you’re sure it’s pressing against his zipper. he grips your hair, making you arch your back. he bites down on your now exposed neck, eliciting a mewl from you.

“didn’t i tell you to behave?” he growls. “do you really wanna be a brat after we just decorated?”

you smile and nod. schlatt can’t help but smile himself. that’s one of the things he loves most about you (trust me, the list is long, but this is towards the top). he loves that you push his buttons and bite back.

“oh, baby,” he muses, licking along your pulse point. “you better be good.”

“make me.”

the two words leave your lips easily before you yelp as your hauled across schlatt’s lap, ass in the air.

“for goodness sake, doll.” he says as he grips your ass harshly. “i’m gonna have to do something about that.”

you lurch forward as his hand comes down onto your ass harshly, a soft moan leaving your lips. you lay there with a smile before schlatt slowly pulls your pants down, exposing your plush ass.

“can’t have any barriers.” he mumbles before beginning his punishment.

each ass cheek is slapped at least 10 times. he wants you squirming and near tears. his cock is pressed up against your stomach as you take the spankings. he doesnt stop until your ass is red and stinging. you whine and look back at him.

“n-no more.” you sob.

“are you gonna be good?” schlatt asks, yanking your hair and pulling you further back. “you gonna be good?”

you nod the best you can. “yes daddy.” you whimper.

“good,” schlatt says, gripping your stinging ass firmly. “because next time i’m going to fuck you in front of the fire place but you won’t be cumming.”

you whine at the threat, knowing full well that you’re going to be pushing his buttons again later that night and getting fucked into the floor for his pleasure only. you giggle as ‘santa claus is coming to town’ plays on the record player. the lyrics make you smile as you snuggle in schlatt’s lap.

you’re gonna be bad, for goodness sake.

[bomber-grl]

Taking care of you when you’re sick 🤧

Pairing(s): Characters x Gn!sick!Reader (except for Reyna’s)

Character(s): Percy, Annabeth, Grover,Nico, Leo, Frank, Hazel, Jason, Piper, Reyna (platonic)

Me rn:

Percy Jackson

Honestly great at it and it’s honestly not expected but also sort of expected

Hard to explain

But it’s likely that he just brings you back to the apartment he lives in with sally, Paul, and ofc Estelle because even though he sort of doesn’t want to admit it, he needs help

So (imagining you’re super sick) even if you’re a stubborn one, it’s too embarrassing to act up in front of Sally

Someone who is so caring that she makes soup just for you, checks in on you, gives you extra blankets in case, honestly anything really

This transformed more into a Sally taking care of you than Percy but I’m getting there

One day Sally has to go out for an errand and takes Estelle with her, Paul went off to work or something

Leaving you two alone and you basically a burden/j

Also… free to complain all you want

Now if you’re stubborn and make it difficult for him he will fr mock you

Literally why are you being this way when Estelle behaves way better

And she’s a baby

Eventually though, cmon now

Just be willing and maybe he’ll kiss you

As if he isn’t doing so while you doze off on your meds

I’d give him a solid 6/10, not because he’s not my fav character or anything

Of course not

Annabeth Chase

Ideal in theory not in practice

She knows everything there is to know- hell, if she didn’t after years of being a demigod and suffering from injuries then strike me down

Well- no actually I take that back

Annabeth doesn’t actually know a lot aside from when she gets sick

Which happens rarely and goes away as quick as it comes

So now she’s here with you all bundled up-

Also, if you try to be stubborn and act like a big baby, she’s having none of it

You will rest and you will eat to consume your meds

End of story

I don’t make the rules 😭

She will, however, be pleased if you’re happy to comply and get you back to good asap

Although she does bumble a bit at the start- she eventually learns quickly

Which is to be expected

When she first started to struggle with what do to she’s too prideful to ask for help so she settles on asking you how to do well by you

Then she realizes how stupid (or unwise) it was to act that way and decides to just ask any of the Apollo kids she knows won’t tease her

Which is more than half

Only because she knew you’d get worse

I’d give her a solid 7/10

It’s not any longer because she gets to business and gets you healed pretty quick so 🤷

Grover Underwood

I’d say he’s pretty decent at taking care of you too

I mean he probably knows a lot about herbs and stuff that could help you alongside modern medicine that you’re likely taking

Plus when you can’t sleep for whatever reason (*cough*cough* congestion*cough*) he’ll obviously put that humidifier on but also play you a song

Either to help with sleep or just make you feel better

Really depends

Also we all know he’s a saytr

So he’s likely taking care of you despite needing to be elsewhere

And if that duty calls quickly? He feels SO bad 😭 I’m not even exaggerating

He’ll apologize ten times over and try to make up for it

Instead of getting your sleep and rest it just results in you spending that time reassuring Grover

Which, in your opinion, is a time well spent

But not to Grover

Anyways if you’re reluctant to let him take care of you then he’s constantly hassling you to stay resting

Literally got to the point where campers would just see you running by, and see Grover not too behind

Or it’d be you sitting somewhere and Grover trying to convince you why going back would be a good idea

Now, if you’re more than happy to rest and take your medicine?

Absolute angel in Grover’s eyes

Literally makes his life 10000x easier

Him being him, he just ends up helping you heal and recover faster than you normally would’ve otherwise

So honestly? You can try to be stubborn all you want but it’s only going to make you suffer 😭

Not much for him but that’s because besides his nervous energy, he’s probably the best here in terms of actually helping you become unsick

Nico Di Angelo

He’ll try his best to help you out 😭

Which he does a pretty decent job at, all he does is rely on books and what he’s heard from others

So it’s time for Nico to rawdog helping you out because frankly, he’s always been the opposite of a normal person

So, why would he ever get sick?

(Bluds body temperature is probably colder than the Antarctic)

He does the basics like making you drink medicine for your symptoms (e.g. cough, sore throat) and making you soup to the best of his capabilities

If you’re the type of person to be whiny and like to be cared after then he’d sort of tease you for it in his strange little way

Now, if you’re super stubborn and insist on him not helping you-

He takes it personally

Like I’m not even joking

He’ll just side eye you

You’re acting like you weren’t just dying of suffocation before he put the humidifier on a few seconds ago

And he lets that known

So, he asks why you’re being so stubborn and let him spoon feed you‼️

(Only because you ended up being bundled in a blanket burrito and Nico didn’t want to go through putting you in one again afterwards)

Too much hassle

Also applies if you’re being stubborn and he has to forcibly feed you)

He’s honestly getting annoyed at this point so you give him a proposition

You’ll let him take care of you if he gives you cuddles

Now, normally Nico would be so done but he couldn’t resist

So now here you both are underneath the covers

But then Nico ruins it

“Yknow I was gonna cuddle you regardless” (of it you complied or not)

6/10 just for that last comment

(Doing an actual story, will link HERE)

Leo Valdez

Someone please help him

Nah just kidding

Leo is definitely way better with machines than with humans

That’s a fact

But he knew his mom long enough to know the basics of everything

I don’t make the rules, that woman definitely taught him everything there is to know

So here you are on the bed of your room as you hear Leo’s racket going on in the kitchen

Emmie and Jo went out and took a few residents with them, including one of your favorite residents:

Georgina

The ones that stayed behind were either asleep or bundled away under the covers of their beds

(Ignoring those doing chores)

Especially since it was now winter, despite the waystations warmth, a chill seemed to have made it way inside.

Eventually Leo makes his way back up and set down a tray

It had a soup you learned to become familiar with

It was Caldo de Res

So obviously you gobbled that shit up like all the other Mexican foods Leo had made before

Eventually Leo makes you take your medicine because even though he’s all about playing around and stuff, he still likes to care for you

Now, because it’s likely snowing, Leo had to resist and refuse to let you out

You’re already sick, it could get so much worse

But you didn’t listen

Hence you running around like a maniac outside the station yelling as Leo chases you

Afterwards he scolds you but when you point out that fact that he was laughing when he was chasing after you- he shuts up real quick

Leo does realize how boring it probably is for you though so after going back inside he tries to be a source of entertainment for you

He tries to find board games and he luckily does

Which ends with you two moving to the living room (?) or common area

By the time emmie and the other residents return, the tower you built while playing Jenga was sky high and skinny asf

Then Leo crashed it and you both obviously yelled at it

Then Leo got told off for distracting you from resting (although it was done kindly)

Later after dinner, Leo snuck into your room at night and once again began to try to rid you of your boredom

you two began giggling and gossiping in the middle of the night

Then went to bed when someone knocked as kindly asked for you two to quiet down

Leo was embarrassed 💀

Frank Zhang

Surprisingly good at taking care of you

Only saying it’s surprising because I’ve never considered it before

He obviously takes care of your basic needs like meds and just covers you needing anything else like rest or water

If you’re stubborn to actually try to get better- then he’s definitely worried but also confused

Why are you acting this way and also, please just let him help you

Which is honestly sad because even if he’d like to stay by your side for more than a few hours- he really isn’t able to due to praetor duties

I mean it’s a surprise you got a pass on your chores/ duties depending on what your role is

Will definitely feel terrible for having to leave to go do his job but eventually finds someone trusted to look after you

Likely someone indebted to him

(He’d feel a bit sorry for whoever it is if you’re particularly resistful)

Let’s say you actually get sick and there’s no outside forces that can interfere

Frank is a pretty top notch- although a bit anxious - doctor

Likely learned a lot about the healing aspect of Apollo back when being his kid was what Frank wanted most

So he knows a lot from that and is really attentive

After giving you some medicine you had seemingly been knocked out cold so it was natural for Frank to turn down the lights

Before he left the room he decided to give you a kiss on the cheek

You were actually still awake and despite your boyfriends more than accommodating care-

You will be teasing him tomorrow using this instance

Overall I’d give Frank a 9/10

‘He is the worlds most perfect man’

Hazel Levesque

Have you seen her lead the other Roman’s as praetor and even before then ? Yea she’s getting you bundled up and fed

No ifs or buts

This is how she is overall but if you try being stubborn she genuinely doesn’t see why you would be

Like why wouldn’t you want to get better??

Also please don’t sneak out to the weaponry or something because she literally CANT give you special treatment 😭

Despite her seemingly tough demeanor, she really is a fool for you

Not actually- but miss girl is smitten with you

So she sort of takes it easy, occasionally finding her voice and scolding you as lightly as she can

She tries her best to treat you but eventually gets advice and help from others in camp who know more than she does

She ofc knows the basics: consume vitamin c, rest, drink medicine, etc

But she can’t be too sure

I also honestly think she’s way better than Nico, because I didn’t include it but he definitely got some wayward damned spirit to help him out

But not her

Not that that’s bad, but she’s definitely more capable

I do think she bumbled a bit

She had ordered some other campers who specialized in healing to help her out

Before then, she had been taking care of you herself

So when they get there and see her sort of make shift stuff- she’s a bit embarrassed

Yknow, if the blush on her cheeks are anything to go by

Because we’ve already established that she’s better than Nico, I’ll give her a 8/10

Because she’s really good at taking care of you, really caring overall

But 🤷

Jason Grace

Best way to say how he is at taking care of you is mediocre

He isn’t constantly attentive but just the right amount that you feel like it’s enough

Esprit he’s busy with the school he’s attending- then he’ll have to sneak out just to see you and take care of you

If school isn’t in session then he’s more than happy to go over and take care of things for you

Like doing chores, cooking food and actually taking care of you

Doesn’t mind all that much if you try to resist being treated because it’s likely that he’s encountered people who are WAY worse

Ik this is him supposed to be taking care of you but I think it’d be so funny that you’re just constantly in and out of consciousness that you only remember small snippets

In which Jason has to fill in for you and all you remember is Jason in the distance

Pretty out of place but the idea of it is so funny to me 😭

Imagine being so kind and your s/o not remembering any of it

You’d still believe him though, why should you?

Also I said it’s mid but like mid leaning good so I’ll give him a 6/10

Not that he was terrible or anything but just because I feel like it suits him

Idk 😭

Piper Mcclean

THE BEST IM NOT EXAGGERATING

The medicine- eating- cooking part is alright

It isn’t much different from the others averages and not much to take note of in all honesty

But what is really the cherry on top is when after having a mind splitting headache- you’ve finally managed to fall asleep

Being a demigod and all- you immediately hear when Piper enters the room

Each creak the floor board gives continued until Piper has reached the end of the bed

Not that it’s disturbing you in anyway

So there you are snuggled in bed and you feel a weight added next to you where the bed is pushing down

You feel hands massaging your scalp and Piper -knowing how you’ve suffered with head pain- starts to sing for you

It isn’t unknown or unheard of to sing for someone to heal (demigod or non demigod wise)

So when you immediately start to feel better you can feel your would ascending into the heavens

Not actually- because that’d be the opposite affect of the singing but you get what I’m going for

Anyway aside from that she’s really attentive and sweet but I just had that idea come to me strongly idk why

Overall id rate her a 7/10

That’s because her singing is divine but her caring aspect is mediocre

Reyna Ramírez-Arellano x F!Reader (for the first half)

(Ex: realized hunters of Artemis don’t get sick after finishing toa)

Literally legendary at taking care of you

Although she is a bit of a dictator when it comes to you being slippery and running off- it’s still pretty great

She was praetor for how long now? Yea a while so she was bound to have learned some things and after joing the hunters it’s only more reason to

Which if you’re a hunter and sick (only confusing but let’s go with it) you need to get your health back up to be in optimal fighting condition so theres literally no room for being stubborn

You need to get well soon and that’s an order basically

So Reyna will bundle you up, (though seeing as you’re more than happy to be cooperative) its only done to make you warm

(Gn! Reader but still platonic)

Now if this is while Reyna is praetor then she’s still enforced this strict persona

And seeing as she’s here taking care of you-

That’s only more reason to

Unfortunately she won’t really have time (seeing that being praetor is really unsustainable long term with the loss of sleep and sleep schedule changes)

But when she does her presence is soothing and likely the only reason you were able to actually get well pretty fast

I don’t have much besides she knows what she’s doing (likely has gotten stupid colds form stress) and is really serious about it

Would give her a 9.5/10 but I’ll change it to a 10/10 because of how fast you recover

-

A/n: req was originally only asking for Nico but I said why not do the other 9

[bunniandhoney]

can you please write an nsfw alphabet for jacob?

why yes, yes i can dear!

Jacob Scipio NSFW Alphabet

mdni. 18+

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Jacob is a pleasure dom, so aftercare is one of his favorite parts of sex. he knows you hate going to bed dirty, so he always makes sure you shower, but if he really wears you out nothing is better than a relaxing bath. Jacob also tries his best to get any tangles from your hair, he’ll separate strand by strand if needed.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

if someone asks him that in public he would say your smile, how infectious it is. but if you asked him on a deeper level he’d say your mouth. He loves when you suck him off, how you immediately push yourself, trying to make sure the tip of your nose meets the hairs at the base of his dick. and then how wet and warm your mouth gets when you do it.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He has a breeding kink. he actually gets upset if he comes anywhere that isn’t your pussy, regardless if you are on birth control or not he has to pump his seed inside you. He also might keep a small plug in his nightstand to ensure you stay full throughout the night.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He’s a panty sniffer; he actually can’t help himself! As soon as he gets them off of you he puts them up to his nose taking a deep breath. He's also been known to slip a couple used pairs in his suitcase when he has to leave, Jacob has to take a piece of you with him.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

bff!jacob: not a virgin, but he’s only ever had sex with one person. Everything else has been a random blowie with a hook up.

alpha detective!jacob: is a virgin! he literally can’t stand anyone else besides his mate, and since he hasn’t claimed anyone yet. The only person allowed to touch him is hisself.

olderbf!jacob: has been around the block a time or two, so to be frank he’s a damn slut. which works in your favor because he treats your body so freaking good. but sometimes, when he’s really rocked your world you just look over at him “where the hell did you learn that?” you say scowling at him.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

well…if we are going to say Jacob has a breeding kink, I believe that a mating press is the only reasonable answer.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

oh he’s dead serious during sex. he’s a pleasure dom and finds nothing funny at all in making you cum. now after…he’s a full blown menace. He definitely seems like the type to mock your moans after the fact.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He’s probably pretty well groomed, not bare because he does like the hair, but trimmed. He has been known to let it grow to a full jungle on occasion.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Sometimes, you need it soft and Jacob is there to grant every last one of your wishes. He loves to press soft kisses all over your body when you all decide to take it slow; literally from your feet to the crown of your head.

when he puts it in he knows he has to go slow, “it’s okay baby, i know this dick is big, but you always take it so thrust* fucking thrust* good thrust* ”

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

while Jacob is rough with you, he’s so damn gentle with himself. For example, he gives himself slow pumps teasing his other hands down his abs, feeling them contract as he makes his way down to his balls. when he holds then Jacob has to tighten the grip on his dick to keep from coming too fast. and boy is it sticky, he just leaks so much precum it’s ridiculous and messy.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

mkay well we said breeding, so how about overstimulation, for both of you. Jacob refuses to do anything half assed so when he fucks he has so make sure that both of you actually reach your limits and that means fucking you until neither of you can take it anymore.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

kitchen, your counters are the perfect height for him to bend you over and do whatever he wants. He has also pulled a wooden spoon out of the drawer to spank you a time or two.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

of course your very existence gets him going buuuuut; if we’re being specific he loves to see you doing something you're passionate about.

imagine you’re on your knees in front of the coffee table with giant noise canceling headphones trying to focus and you’re just going in on your newest 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle. your tongue poking out just a little on the side as you look for the next matching piece. and unbeknownst to you jacob is so hard he could cut diamonds.

the next thing you know you’re riding his face, “mmm keep working baby, you’re almost there. “ he says muffled by your cunt. and honestly you have no clue if he’s talking about you cumming or you finishing the puzzle, but neither of you really cares.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Jacob is Caribbean, he’s not pissing on anyone or vice versa. Now he’s usually open to trying or at least having a discussion, especially if you’re married. because forever is a long time to not try anything new.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He's a munch, simple as that. Jacob is ready to put his tongue on any part of your body.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

rough and slow actually. He's definitely a manhandler, but he doesn’t want you to miss anything. Jacob needs you to feel everything that he’s doing to you, actually he needs to pound it into you.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Jacob prefers to make you come more than once, so he’s not fond of the quickie. but at the same time he needs to have his hands on you and will take whatever you give him, even if it’s a quick handy before you all leave for a date night.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

he’s very private and very possessive, he’s most likely not trying anything too risky. Jacob is also a gentleman, so he wouldn’t dare put you in a situation where you might be uncomfortable.

Though I could see him sharing you with a close friend (boy or girl) if you were looking to experiment. He's not stupid though, NDA’s are certainly being passed around.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

If it were up to him, he’s fuck you till he’s sore and then go two more rounds. You see, because Jacob is the kind of man who nuts and stays hard.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Jacob most def has a cock ring, it started off as a gag gift for his birthday, but one night after you all took one too many edibles you two gave it a try. and once he figures out that he could fuck you even longer than usual, he loves the damn thing. he can’t use it too often though because he gets sore.

you don’t use vibrators too often either because you’re so damn sensitive, and Jacob can make you come at the drop off the hat, but not when you’ve been naughty…Jacob will have you tied to the bed, with you laying on your stomach and a vibrating wand snug against your clit while he watches you cum over and over.

He did also get a dildo made in the shape of his dick for you, but he’s so damn possessive that he doesn’t even want to see the silicone inside of you, regardless if it’s modeled after his own dick or not.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Oh he’s Mr. Teaser himself, Acting CEO of Teasing Inc.

He loves to see you squirm, especially because you are stubborn as hell. He knows the only way for you to let go is to bring you to the very edge. but bringing you there just once is never enough, Jacob needs you practically crying before he lets you come.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Jacob has a tendency to be on the quieter side, but mainly because he wants to get you loud, screaming for him. He also likes to whisper dirty shit in your ear because he’s just that diabolical, so mainly expect gruffs and huffs from him.

Now sub!jacob can’t shut the hell up! There have been plenty of times where you had to put your hand over his mouth in the backseat of the car, just so the driver won’t hear him whine for you.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

cowboy fugitive jacob x bounty hunter reader 👀

but could you freaking imagine!!!

————

“This here poster says you’re wanted dead or alive Scipio, and you’re more trouble to me breathing.” YN says holding the pistol to his back. YN had first seen him at the bar in Aunt Fanny’s Saloon, and with a 5,000 dollar reward for his head she couldn’t pass it up, so she set up outside waiting for her moment.

It just so happens that “her moment” is when sharpshooter scipio is ass-naked at the watering hole in the back.

“Look darlin’, I don’t know who you are, but I’m sure we can work something out.” he turns around with his cock pointed right at you

—

I mean talk about a loaded gun!

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

6 1/2 inches, and my word he is thick! no matter how many times you all have sex, you’ll feel a slight burn from the stretching and you love it. he’s more of a shower but he might stretch to a good 7-7 1/2 inches when he’s hard. and obviously it’s brown, with a nice mauve tip (uncut 👀)

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

HIGH! when he’s with someone he really likes , he’s gonna fuck till he’s sore. he’s a physical touch demon, and needs to be on you at all times

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

as soon as you’re both cleaned up, he’s knocked out. oftentimes you all hop back into the bed once the sheets are changed and you cuddle up right next to him. with your nails lightly scratching at his beard and his arm wrapped around you Jacob can’t help but to fall asleep even if you’re still awake.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

jeez, this is just dirty (complimentary)

thank you for the request!

i’m still working through all of them, also trying to incorporate them into my other tropes for y’all.

also yall love a lil smut, so how do we feel about like a smut concept night sort of thing 👀

get all of your naughty thoughts out in one evening (or several)

lmk your thoughts and keep the requests coming pls!

xoxo

Bunni

[doawks]

༊*·˚ what it’s like being with joshua hong.

♫. that’s my girl, frank sativa.

contains sfw & nsfw.

Joshua likes to call you an angel because that's what you are. In fact, if he's feeling extra sentimental (which he normally is) ━ He'll tell you that it was obviously fate that brought you two together. He remembers his late nights when he was usually deep in thought, and how he would pray and pray for God to send an angel his way and bring sunshine to his world so his heart could heal and grow ━ It's memorable to note that since he's met you, you've done just that. Brought light to his world and now his heart's big and fully grown.

Joshua likes to spoil you from the hairs on the top of your head down to the tip of your prettily manicured toe because you deserve the best and nothing less. Seriously, whatever you want. 'Cause nothing is ever too much for his girl - ever.

Joshua likes to show you off━ not to flaunt you like you're some kind of animate object and ignite jealousy in other males, no. But to show the entire world how breathtakingly beautiful you are.

Joshua always, always has you in mind. It doesn't matter what he's doing or where he's at. He needs to have you in his mind, especially when he's on tour and he's so busy to the point where he can't even pick up the phone to text you. The mere thoughts of you and your pretty face is what's keeping him sane.

Joshua likes to listen to anything and everything you say. Every little thing, even when you think he isn't listening━ he is. He likes that you always get so excited when you speak about your day or something as simple as the weather, it's so adorable and he's very fond of it.

(nsfw) Joshua likes to kiss you━ Wherever. But if he's going to be appropriate, Joshua likes kissing your pretty lips because they're perfectly molded and feel so soft against his. He likes to kiss your nose, your cheeks, your forehead. But if he's going to be inappropriate, Joshua likes to kiss your neck, your collarbone or down your pretty body so he can ease his way down to your cunt - spending his morning in between your thighs. Obviously kissing on your clit and puffy lips, because he loves kissing you ━ every damn inch of you.

Joshua likes making everything about you. If he hears one of the members talking about something they like and you just so happen to like it as well, best believe this man will be like, "Oh! YN likes that as well!" with a big ass, boyish grin on his face. Or if he's out at the store shopping for clothes or anything and he see's something that reminds him of you, he'll be thinking, "YN would probably like this." and end up buying whatever it is . . . this correlates with him always having you in mind.

Joshua likes when you send pictures of yourself because he's always quick to make it his wallpaper instantly. He's also saving every picture you send and adding it to his "My pretty girl" collection. He's so whipped for you, it's honestly crazy. And when he's on tour or far away from you, he goes through that collection with a small, content smile on his face ━ silently soaking up all your beauty from the screen awaiting the days 'til he'll get to see your pretty face again in person.

(nsfw) Joshua likes to be sweet and delicate with you. He likes to whisper huskily in your ear, telling you how pretty look while taking his cock like a good girl. He likes━loves to tell you how one day he's going to fuck you full of his come and make you mommy - belly round and breast full of milk as they drip from your swollen nipples. But Joshua can also get rough and mean, telling you how much of a nasty little slut you are for taking him from behind in this dirty public bathroom at the club because you just couldn't wait 'til you two got home so he could properly take care of you. No, you just couldn't wait. Now you're whining and moaning like a bitch in heat while Joshua's splitting your pussy apart on his cock, mascara running down your face, his hand in your hair - pulling the back of your head to his chest.

Joshua's love language: Act of Service. You honestly don't even know why you try to lift a finger when Joshua Hong is around. He makes breakfast every morning and on top of that, he feeds it to you! Giving you a look and a disgruntled grunt when you attempt to lift up your own fork. When he's home before you are, he running you a bath as soon as you walk through the door ━ when he comes from the bathroom, he's making his way over to you, pulling you over to the couch, placing you onto his lap and rubbing your back soothingly; letting you tell him all about your day, not saying anything until you were fully finished. In the bath, he's seated in the back of you and he's washing every part of your body, kissing the skin behind your ear lovingly while doing so.

At the end of the day, Joshua just likes loving you and he will continue loving you until his last breath on this Earth. Even then, he'll still be loving you in the afterlife.