#he knows absolutely fucking nothign

[amirmeavid]

One of the funniest things about merlin fanfic is when they write magical fight scenes and its so fucking difficult to do because merlin doesn't fight in a normal way.

Like with other fandoms there's like a technique. Like there are spells to cast, techniques to use, difficulties and simple approaches. But merlin doesn't subscribe to any of that.

Like this is basically a god with the skill of a toddler.

He just tanks shit.

He doesn't even know that many spells. Like his opponents are doing all this magical techniques and hand-wavey stuff and he just... stands there. Like maybe he stumbles back sometimes, but most of the time he just takes it.

Like his opponents will be doing the magical equivalent of tornado kicks, flips, and somersaults and then he gets like a papercut. Then he lopsidedly punches with the worst form ever seen and his opponent gets flung back 200m.

He's the singular most annoying person to ever have to fight, cause you're out here pulling out your best moves, then he flicks you on the forehead and you die.

EDIT: IF YOU HAVE READ THIS FAR YOU OWE ME A BOOP. BY LAW. I EARNED IT.

EDIT2: You may comment the word instead, however it is no longer legally required.

[heartonxions]

plsplspls tell me about your thai shadow gear brain worms some more i wuv dem

UWAA... i will try my bestest .hehe. im so glad you like my thai sg brain worms...

Songkran-isms bc it makes sense

droy uses full buckets of water and it's fucking terrifying because he can absolutely lift all that and knock a bitch (jet) out if he so pleases

also has water backpack he carries around

jet dual wields water guns and likes chasing the tuk-tuks and busses and spray water in them

jet breakdances on the wet road and it really fucking hurts but also its so fun

jet loses his flip flops every year

levy doesn't really care what she uses but one year she did use an empty weed sprayer and still has phantom arm soreness

she pranks the boys by catching them with their guard down and dropping water in their pants

they do love driving around and do a splash drive buy, but they like walking the most

levy also does the most talcum powder applying tbh tbh

they get juvia in it <3 because obv

consider water rave festival au

lily.... stays at home.. jk he has perfect vantage point from above

gajeel thought he could be intimidating but there is no mercy...

Everything Else:

droy can do mean thai yell (you usually hear it during celebrations and the such, i can't explain it because I don't know the actual word for it but in this song the very first cry is what im talking about)

i don't even know if i can do a favorite dish they all like becuase i think they would like all of it lol... spice tolerance from most to least is droy, levy, jet

jet is a SLUT for thai ice cream sandwiches .. they're not like the american ice cream sandwiches btw, it's like ice cream in an actual bun with white bread or something

levy loves loves fish sauce and fruit. that boy loves tart shit ok guys. she gets like the underripe fruits and just eats that with salt, sugar, and pepper like it's nothign (she got gajeel hooked on it)

droy likes agar jellies and coconut rice .. heart..

jet has hella beef with this one thai auntie neighbor but no one can tell if it's genuine or like a secretly agreed on beef

khon masked dancer jet.

nang mai/rukkhadeva (ghost inhabiting a large tree) droy heh.. heh...

ive definitely said this but droy is a great luk thung (thai country) singer,

Songs Because I Can't Help It I LOVE MUSIC

droy and levy vibes tbh (tis also one of the iconic thai new years songs teehee)

jet new years song

jet and levy campy gay hostility

this isn't even major sg to me imi just in awe with how much i hate this song but also keep listneing to (if it sounds like a song talking about twerking, it is. and it's so . .. . /confused)

majorrrrr silly jet vibes (the song is about a scam caller getting pranked or something)

this song is like how i think jet and droy would "flirt" with levy in the way that it is a BIT and they are teasing gajeel, and its just silly (the song is silly and is basically hey girl have you eaten yet!!!!!)

[dykevanny]

haz i know absolutely nothign about zeno rpg but ur zeno au has intrigued me and im curious about it,,, i saw smth abt like. meomory loss and being handcuffed together and ik they eat ppl but thats it 😭 explain the au if u want ig bc im interested and i think thye look so silly. also bc u put vanny n will in my brain and they wont leave im shooing them with a boom and they are not moving

OK LET ME GET THE INFODUMP<3

So ummm Zeno au<3 I’m really normal. Allow me to give a brief explanation of what Zeno is first You see, Zeno is a fictional disease sort of thing that makes people cannibals. Specifically an oneset is caused by traumatic events/extreme cases of unrequited love(specifically mostly familial) and the only cure is eating the flesh of someone else with Zeno.(not widely known.) It’s also transmittable through biting like zombies. there’s one specific facility with scientists dedicated to getting to the bottom of how to cure zeno, also housing ‘patients’ (or, people with zeno being used as lab rats). Now onto character lore.

So william and henry were good friends right. Yeah. Considering that they even have a small diner together. Well one day will got zeno (oh no!) and started slowly picking off kids going to the diner. He even accidentally attacked Charlie, who escaped in one piece luckily. Charlie went to the afton household to see if he was doing okay (because will’s like an uncle to her and all! And also what if everyone else got hurt?) only to find will ate them all oops. And yeah same happened to her, but since he transmitted zeno to Charlie he was cured! How convenient! The people in charge of the labs ended up roping him and henry into being scientists for them through shady shady means and well the two aren’t on good terms and avoid each other like the plague. Henry’s still sore over the ‘you ate my fucking daughter’ thing. Luckily he has his assistant/the archivist (tape girl) to keep him company. So Vanessa right! Crazzy I know. Nessa as we know comes from a broken family. In this specific au I’m mixing her backstory with the character who’s place she’s taking (hi kuro) so basically her parents. Neglect her. In favor of her younger sibling because she was born from her mom’s affair and blablabla… she grows up basically taking care of herself. Eventually she develops zeno and starts you know. Killing and eating random girls as you do. When one night she comes home and is confronted by her parents about this!! And well you can guess. What happens to them lol. She gets captured and taken to the zeno facility where she’s specifically studied/talked to by William! They’re funny bc nessa hasn’t had anyone willingly spend so much time around her and be so nice to her. Will … well she’s a specimen to him lol. Since being cured himself zeno has been a subject of interest to him, he’s thrown himself completely into his work (under the guise of feeling soooo guilty for his actions which henry can see right through) and well. He’s realized the consumption of human flesh has something to do with it, since eating Charlie cured him. So he’s been …. Robbing the morgue/killing people when needed to feed vanessa every time they meet. Which, she’s more docile when she’s not hungry so it kind of works but she’s not like cured you know. It has the side affect of her being hungry when it’s time for someone to chat with her though which was funny the one time henry had to go in will’s stead cause he offered her a granola bar and she was like 😐 ew.?? Anyways will has gotten her total trust because he also plays board games with her yay!! He’s the only one not enforcing the whole straightjacket-dog muzzle combo also so she’s like woah !! He sees me as another human unlike these other guys :DD (needless to say zeno patients are not treated very humanely.lol) there was also one time tape girl had to be a substitute for william but nothing of note happened they just kinda chilled and ness threatened her in a backhanded and mildly gay sort of way.as you do.

Anyway yeah so basically Henry’s been experimenting with treatment through amnesia and totally surely unrelated note at the actual start of the story, Will and Nessa wake up in a strange room with no clue who they are or how they got here, and have to navigate the now bloody and corpse-strewn facility while handcuffed together with nothing to guide them except each other and the only clue to their pasts is tampered resumes which effectively switch their backstories!! Nessa is under the impression that she’s the scientist (the whole cannibalism part was left out) and she thinks William is the serial murderer/cannibal. Which was funny cause she read her own resume like wow… I’m kind of a big deal huh :) and then read Will’s like ERM.OKAY… Will didn’t read either of the resumes. Also tape girl gave everyone code names and said code names were swapped on the resumes also! So ‘bonnie’(nessa) and ‘vanny’(will) are just kind of cluelessly walking around like damn this place is really… corpsey:) until henry starts showing up and trying to kill them (he contracted zeno big surprise) and also tape girl (assumed dead) shows up sometimes just to see how things are going. Lots of shenanigans and also murder ensue.

The game also has multiple endings so. sometimes nessa ends up killing william lol. Intestine jumprope…. … ……… Also side note.will found out it’s specifically zeno infected humans that need to be fed to patients to cure them but kinda. Didn’t cure nessa on purpose<3 because she’s sort of entirely dependent on him in this way and she’s kind of his only friend.the same way he’s her only friend……wacky wild!

Tape girl is having a fucking.day. Because henry mentioned he was going to do something but likeee. She didn’t expect to be caught in the crossfires of a HUGE MASS MURDER CANNIBAL EVENT.AS LIKE ONE OF THE 4 PEOPLE STILL ALIVE IN HERE,.. once he chilled out henry explained himself and she agreed to help out (she also decided to distribute some of her recorded notes.just for fun…after the two get separated for the first time ‘vanny’ listens to them and is like woah… i was a patient here⁉️ And bon was my unethical doctor⁉️⁉️ which is funny) but like. She is the only one NOT infected in here and would like to keep it that way so she’s having quite the time. Seeing vanessa walking around unrestrained keeps jumpscaring her LOL. Once ness’s zeno symptoms start returning well ofc will as the only one she’d encountered here who she cares about is the first target but tape girl nearly gets chomped too lol.

Zeno has an interesting affect on the subjects mood which is funny. Basically when an oneset happens and the person with zeno is running around eating people they’re in a crazed manic state which. Is really fun.will and nessa are wandering around handcufffed and he’s like uhh bonnie you okay cause her facial expressions.well they went from the example on the left to the one on the right.

It’s funny bc. The memory erasure actually technically did work… her symptoms only started returning bc she got bit LOL

Pre-the amnesia incident the other three’s interactions with vanessa were pretty.limited. Considering she’s theeee most dangerous patient. Will talks to her for like an hour daily but Henry only really knows her as ‘william’s mutt’ (he was especially not a fan when he found out will had been FEEDING HER HUMAN FLESH.) and tape girl is afraid of her but also. Kind of endeared from their two in person interactions. The second one in which vanessa tried to convince her to let her cannibalize her but hey she was very polite about it..!! Henry and tape girl are both shocked and stunned that she’s actually pretty chill when she’s not insane and eating people.

TL;DR

^these fuckheads are almost all cannibals and beating each other up forever

[heretherebedork]

thank you for putting your frustration with love sea into posts. i agree 100% it feels like i am watching a completely different show than the people loving it in the tag and on my dash the only positive was the pretty scenery in the first couple episodes and the fact that fort and peat work great together. i liked their earlier sex scenes. i thought they could have an interesting dynamic once it develops further. there was something to it that i could latch on. and now i just skip forward through most scenes, and i entirely skip vi and mook (aahahahahah i hate vivi so so so so much, absolutely nothign she does is genuine. she is so childish and entitled and so fucking annoying.) i completely agree with your comments re: mut and how we are told he is a good guy but he barely lives up to that reputation. most of the time he ignores boundaries. like, really important boundaries. and what the hell is going on with meena and how him being meant to protect her apparently means making her face her abusive grandfather... oh boy! if the show had 12 episodes, i'd drop it. but i've endured it so far, so now i want to finish it.

The problem is that he is a MAME seme which is to say that he is perfect in every way and if he's not, well yes he was and you better accept that.

It's why I call Ter a MAME seme.

But yes.

I watch, I write, I suffer and I do it willingly. But I also don't tag it because I am here to offer my opinion and I know I won't change anyone's mind.

We are definitely watching a different show than the people loving it and I've experienced that many times before and I really do wonder what show they're watching sometimes.

The worst part is that they were close with Mut. Like, I was even just rolling my eyes are most of what he did. But today's episode was SO contradictory to everything that's happened in the other episodes and that's been said about him and with his own damn words that I don't know how people... aren't bothered by it.

Now, admittedly, I do not seek out positive meta about this show. I read it if I see it and I am often very confused by it but I do not look for it and most of my mutuals aren't watching.

But it's just... it's wild to me.

I will finish it. I always do. But also because if I am going to criticize MAME, I gotta know what's going on.

[recordsstraight]

EMMA + ALCOHOLISM

So since there’s enough people here that don’t know Emma that much and don’t know of her alcoholism, I’ve decided to do an in depth headcanon about it all. I apologize ahead of time at how long this is going to get, but also I’m not sorry. When I tell this story, please keep in mind that Emma lives in Canada, where the legal age to drink is 18! 

the normalizing: Alcohol was normalized in her life long before she was old enough to drink. Every day that her Father would come home, he would pop open a beer and have two or three to ‘unwind’ for the day, no matter if it was a good day or a bad day. The bad days, Steve tended to switch to a hard liquor rather than having a beer. Even at a young age, it wasn’t uncommon for Emma to be the one to go and ‘fetch’ a beer for him as he sat in his chair, and on special occasions (like holidays and whatnot), Emma was allowed to have a single glass of wine. And while none of these things are precursors or reasons why Emma fell into alcoholism, it did normalize alcoholism because yes, there is such a thing as casual alcoholism and it absolutely played a part in her life and deserves to be mentioned. 

the beginning of it all: As Emma got older and more in her teen years, Steve let her have drinks a bit more frequently than just holidays and special occasions. Granted it wasn’t a lot, but it only furthered the normalization of it all ... and when her middle brother and her father’s relationship began to crumble and fall into flames, Emma began to sneak the alcohol ... a fact that only increased the moment Steve was killed in an accident at work. 

Now you might be thinking ... where was Emma’s mother, Mikayla, during all of this? Well ... she certainly didn’t approve of how Steve gave Emma alcohol like he did, but when it came down to it, when Steve so blatantly ignored his wife to do so anyways, it created a certain sort of rebellion in Emma after the fact that he was gone. In the middle of her own grief, its hard to keep account of the alcohol that’s consumed in the household, especially when one of your children is old enough to drink. The blame has nothign to do with Mikayla, and everything to do with the brothers who bought alcohol to replace what they all were drinking, not thinking for one moment that Emma’s consumption was getting worrisome. A fact that only worsened when the family moved from the home that they lived in up until Steve’s death. 

Kyle: This fuck deserves his own section in this, because Kyle is the biggest and heaviest influence in Emma’s drinking. He was one of the first people that Emma met after they moved. She was fragile ... influenceable, and she was fun. He ‘took her under his wing’, allowed her to feel an emotional high with his attention, and considering he was a partier and he was a couple years older, he was yet another source of provision of alcohol to her. He contributed heavily to her alcoholism, actively encouraging her as she drank herself into full black outs, even going so far at one point to send Emma to the hospital for alcohol poisoning. As his narcissistic personality comes out is when this happens, as Emma uses alcohol as a crutch, as a way of drinking away her problems ... a fact that worsens yet again after the rather spectacular and horrific end to their relationship. 

pregnancy and postpartum: because Emma was drinking as she was, its a fucking miracle that she didn’t lose her pregnancy, let alone have Aubrey born without some serious medical issues. For nearly 3 months Emma didn’t realize she had morning sickness, merely playing it off as her hangovers. It was during one of the few moments where she didnt’ have a drink for a few days and her morning sickness continued that she realized what might be happening ... and was absolutely horrified at the result of her multiple pregnancy tests. She was, after all, still a teenager, and still in school ... and pregnant with a man’s child who she was no longer with. At first, it was difficult to remain sober, but she did so until the end of her pregnancy, and because alcohol was deemed such a large part of her life ... she chose to formula feed over breast feeding for one reason, and one reason along: so she could drink when she wanted to without hurting the baby further. The day she got home, she poured herself a drink, and every night when Aubrey was asleep Emma would do the same. Hell there were many nights when Emma was up with a colicy baby that she’d still have somethign to drink after putting a screaming Aubrey down in her crib, and let her scream because absolutely nothing would help ... a fact that was born from Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. 

guilt: after she found out she was pregnant, after it was discovered that Aubrey was underweight and underdeveloped in the beginning and remained underweight through the pregnancy and birth, Emma is under no illusion that its not her fault... and every day through the pregnancy guilt eats away at her. She knows damn well that the colic Aubrey endures for hours on end is her fault. She knows that Aubrey being born premature and with the fact that newborn clothing was way too big for Aubrey was Emma’s own fault. Guilt eats away at Emma and only fuels the need for alcohol further. A couple nights she gets too drunk to tend to Aubrey over it all, forcing Mikayla to tend to both her child and her grandchild ... for they both live under her roof yet. 

recovery: it isn’t until Emma’s mother meets a man by the name of Joey that Emma starts down a different path. She couldn’t tell you what prompted Joey and her to have the night conversation that they did, she couldn’t tell you what exactly it was that was said ... but she does remember the overwhelming emotion that had her breaking down in his arms. She had accepted him at the very least by then ... and a relationship was beginning to form, but that night was a turning point. its not an easy thing, and its not without her relapses and her issues with AA, a class that she wound up dropping out of and going to a more local group with Joey’s help and presence. And just like with any recovering addict, its not just once that she falls flat on her ass in her attempt to get sober. But there’s one thing that some other’s might not have: a solid support system that’s unwavering and as nonjudgmental as they come. 

staying sober: Emma’s a mother ... and the mommy wine culture runs rampant through motherhood. She has yet to meet a single mother who doesn’t casually make jokes about alcoholism, or try insisting on Emma drinking, or even criticize her for not drinking wine with them. Being a mother in Canada and eventually the States is her own personal hell, and because of it, Emma has next to no friends that are parents. She had found early on that cutting them out and keeping them out tends to fair better on her mental health and her ability to stay sober than trying to educate them or even tell them that she was a recovering addict. The times that she tried? The invites to hang almost instantly stopped coming and excuses rose. 

being Emma’s friend / partner: you have to have a basic understanding of what being with a recovering alcoholic means. No, Emma doesn’t mind if you drink around her ... but should it become excessive or should you start leaving alcohol at her house, she will ask you to stop and if you can’t respect it, she’s not below cold cutting you out of her life. Just because she doesn’t drink, doesn’t mean she will expect you not to ... but she does expect the basic respect of her boundaries that it creates. It took a long time for Emma to find those boundaries through trial and error, but now that she knows it and knows her own limits, she is unwavering and won’t budge on it. 

[patchdotexe]

doip.: session 1 / 7.11.21

LAST TIME ON DOIP we got our asses solidly handed to us by a manticore and alidaar wasn't actually set up to use his class specialization because i've never played a fighter before. also i wasn't paying attention to half the session bc i was probably dissociating so my notes are incredibly useless.

jorb: nameless still doesnt have any personality traits on their sheet but that's okay nyx: don't worry about it.

jorb: do you want a recap? leo: yeah, my notes are garbage jorb: okay! PREVIOUSLY, ON DRAGON BALL Z.... [starts ACTUALLY PLAYING THE "PREVIOUSLY ON DBZ" MUSIC] leo: I AM GOING TO KILL YOU

oh god i have to do math oh my mic cut out during the dbz bit so the last thing anyone heard was me Yelling. and it also means jorb missed out on my applause. f. anyway nothing of importance was lost bc i was mostly whining about math

tobias is casting Speak With Animals! ...on a druid! who he doesn't know is a druid! tobias: don't worry little buddy, we'll get this curse off of you some day. nameless: uhhhhhhhhhhhhh alidaar can't understand nameless in wildshape yet so he's just overhearing tobias talking to him and nameless going [binturong noises]

tobias: [thinking] should i ask him if he knows.. math? how intelligent is this raccoon???

michael: wait is it allie-dar or alee-darr leo: .........i forgot! (it's alee-darr)

nyx: ARE YOU YEETING ME IN THE RIVER? heading to gnomengarde! alidaar fell in the river like a dipshit (he's fine) we are already making jorb's life hard bc he has to figure out auras on roll20

jorb: ..and you see a gnome. alidaar: howdy! jorb: and she says.. "strangers! good! i've been looking for someone to test this [crossbow contraption] on!" alidaar: NOOOOOOOOOOOOPE jorb: ROLL FOR INITIATIVE.

we have managed to de-initiative! alidaar still got shot though. he'll walk it off.

leo: delete my aura. my vibes are so rancid

tobias has been assigned sieron. we've found several gnomes! they are not shooting us. they also like mushrooms? "death corridor" is now the official term for the hallway where alidaar got shot. thanks facktore. im excited to learn all the silly gnome names-- FABLESTABLE? DABBLEDOB? I HAVE GREAT TIMING.

tobias: that explains the mushrooms. i wonder how they taste? alidaar: like mushrooms, i guess.

tobias has discovered the new gnomish invention, Barrel Crabs! "DO WE WANT TO FIT THE FUCKING *BINTURONG* IN THE BARREL CRAB?" "I AM NOW DUAL WIELDING CRABS."

tobias calls the binturong Friend! alidaar calls him Little Guy.

nyx: what's plan c? jorb: plan c is crabs. leo: I AM NOW DUAL WIELDING CRABS.

little guy is biting through the string on the crossbows! jorb gets to figure out how to deal with this mechanically. HOLY SHIT IT WORKED time to roll initiative again! LITTLE GUY HAS 24 INITIATIVE HOLY FUK

jorb: nameless, what do you want to do? nyx: im going to jump on her face and bite it. - nyx: can i crawl up her? leo: crawling all over her like weevils michael: i believe they're called bishops.

little guy is crawling on facktore and biting her face.

"am i proficient in myself?" figured out how to set up ali's breath weapon in roll20! woo! im learning! we are absolutely ruining facktore's day lmao alidaar: i lean out and flip her off jorb: literally?! alidaar: I'M HERE TO CAUSE EMOTIONAL DAMAGE NOW (and then i ran in and managed to do some damage with my morningstar! and also rolled a nat1 on my dual weapon fighting thing. whoops)

[checks twitter] ah. the wyatts are arguing about putting thirteen in a blender and 3d printing. having a normal one.

combat done! we broke the spinny crossbow machine! and facktore is now ignoring us to fix it lmao.

alidaar: what you see is what you get. i'm a dragonborn, and [looks at tobias] you're human, right? you're a normal human man? you're a human bitch man? bastard? bastard man? you're normal?

my face hurts so fucking hard from laughing oh my godddddddd . we had to prove we weren't "shapechangers" (nevermind the druid) and . i accidentally charlie'd too hard. tobias: guess i've got to add that to my flaws, i'm a stinky bastard bitch man!

jorb: [as gnome] ..and my name is pog. leo: YESS!!!!!!!!!!!

alidaar: oh great, they've got windmills. tobias: nothign wrong with windmills. alidaar: theyve got FLOOR windmills, that's so out of date

i . was checking the blaseball library bc something got unredacted and apparenty we threw little guy into the pita cutter room???

tobias: ah, um, excuse me, mr pog?

notes probably gonna trail off bc im losing focus whoops

jorb: you see two gnomes having a very animated conversation. leo, tired: a very anime conversation. michael: with hair like that, what kinda other conversation can she have?

fibblestib and dabbledob...

king korboz has lost his shit and imprisoned king gnerkli! this is a problem

[polyhexian]

God I really love cyberverse hot rod. The quintesson arc was just so powerful. The emotions were running so high. And I just love the boys, hot rod and bumblebee and cheetor, definitely all the three most immature comparatively, the youthful idealists so they just fit right in together... And then like the breakdown as they all get to the end... When drift follows them and hot rod stops to fight him and tells bumblebee and cheetor to go on without him with a brave smile and knows he's going to die and then. He drags drift into the ichor, taking them down together just... And then when we cut back to cheetor and bumblebee and all the jokes and playing it cool is over. bumblebee realizes he can't raise hot rod on comms and what that means and cheetor keeps trying to keep him cool, saying he might be fine, he's probably fine, it's okay, just don't think about it let's keep going, because that's how they all have learned to survive in cyberverse. Just don't think about it. Just keep moving. But bumblebee is overcome and he has nothign left in him to fight it and pretend. He just collapses, stopped in full by grief until he's spurred again into action. And then CHEETOR sacrifices himself too and leaves bumblebee behind, thanking him for his friendship...

But then when hot rod wakes up again he stumbles out onto the surface looking for help or his friends and he finds the world ruined again. And he doesnt know what happened to cheetor. He doesn't know what happened with the allspark. He's alone. He's the cheeky kid and he's alone and he has to grow up right the fuck now. And then the LOOP

Trying again and again and again and again... Desperate...

Hot rod being told they need a leader, not Optimus, and despite hot rod stepping up and DOING it, DOING what's gotta get done no matter how much it seems to shake him to his core to do so he doesn't want to be leader because that means giving up on Optimus and he's not ready for that yet.

The scene where rodimus just buckles down and says he's going to keep trying until he gets to Optimus no matter WHAT and he goes again and again and again until it's muscle memory and then he GETS there, he gets there and it's not enough. He almost remembers but it's not enough and it's never going to be enough. The absolute bereft desolation of it. Hollowed out with a spoon.

God I really love cyberverse hot rod. Hot rod is a character I think is really often used wrong. The character really needs to be like... You need to sell that growth from youthful idealist kid to legitimate leader of the autobots and they DO. They give it the time to SIMMER and so it's TASTY

[the-slut-verses]

tct final thoughts

oh boy this is gonna be a long one,,, i’m gonna begin with the things that i liked so that 1) it doesn’t feel like i just wasted my time when i could’ve been listening to literally to any of the hundreds of other podcasts im subscribed to and 2) this show did so many things right, i wouldn’t be as emotionally invested and fired up about it as i am if it was just  a purely garbage show

everyone in the cast gave just stellar performances especially adam and caleb’s actors,,, gosh that final confrontation in ep 19 where they had that big long talk about their feelings and it was so raw and real and genuine,,, how having mental baggage really just can fuck with a good healthy relationship no matter how much the people love each other and mean well

going into this show, i wasn’t looking forward to hearing about adam and caleb having been broken up cuz that just seemed, so out of character from where we last saw them in the original series,,, but i was pleasantly surprised with just how enjoyable their new dynamic as awkward exes that are still just completely in love with each other,,, i love this drama,, i love seeing these disasters inadvertently hurt each other (honestly it kinda worked too well cuz,,, more on that in the negative section)

CAITLIN! I love caitlin so much!!! and i just love her dynamic with adam,, i mean like, fried rice nights, shared google calendars, stressing out over essays that aren’t due for months,, i love these two!! also it’s so fresh cuz like,, usually it’s just the one nerdy loner character,, but here we get two and they’re just lovely for each other,,, lol i can totally see these dudes just moving in together and just getting married if they’re still both single by age 40 for the tax benefits

she was only in a couple of episodes,,, but i love love hearing joan again, especially that bit where caleb just infodumps at her all the shit he’s going through and she’s just 0_o that was such a fun throwback

minor thing, but the confirmation that the bryants are asian (when mark got oliver to take off his shoes when entering his house)

the soundscape and music was phenomenal! one of the most well done soundscapes i’ve ever had the pleasure of listening to,,, and the theme was stuck in my head all week

now,, all the things that i hated:

super mixed feelings about the bu crew,,,, im a fan of ride or die friendships, like what they were trying to go for here,, but like,,, the characters here aren’t very likable,,,

frankie’s flirting at caitlin came across as creepy rather than charming and it frustrates me so much that they got paired off by the end

i don’t get what ben’s deal is,,, i didn’t get much of their character outside of them being kidnapped and being a powerful atypical as plot device

and sadie’s just,,, she’s such a dick to adam and caitlin, constantly belittling and invalidating their feelings,,that line about her getting to be angry at adam and caleb but adam not being allowed to,,, just made my blood boil

also the characters act like she has just Very Good Takes:tm: on life and the human condition when they’re very much Not

honestly overall i don’t get what their deal is,, like what they’ve been through as friends, why they care for each other, how they got that way,,, and i don’t really have much reason to care for them

the adam caleb drama was so fun and like,,, honestly i was rooting for them to stay fucking apart by the end of the series,,, the weird pacing this show was going for made their ending feel super fucking rushed,, and they have way more fucking shit to deal with and talk about,,, and we’ll never get to see that cuz the show thought a tacked on ancient atypical cult conspiracy was more interesting,, which is a real fucking shame cuz what appealed so much about the original show is all the talking about feelings,,,

everything about the time fucking book and the atypical cult was not very compelling and felt forced and rushed and tacked on and there are so many plotholes,,, like,,, what are a bunch of fucking college kids gonna do about a conspiracy that’s been going on for generations,, and apparently even people like the am or the order can’t deal with them,, cuz they’re super hidden or whatever,,, but ppl just randomly hanging out in the library can fucking overhear all their bullshit

i was never given any believable explanation about why they can’t just ask the am to deal with this nonsense,,, when two very powerful people in the am care very deeply about the characters in the midst of this dangerous plot,,, and they already knew about it but did fucking nothing,,, and they keep fucking lampshading it but not actually address it. this whole nonsense felt like a ploy to get adam and caleb to talk to each other again when they seriously didn’t need it

blackwell was such a bad villain,, he was so melodramatic but not even in a fun way,,, and uggh,,, i can’t help but compare the new villains, this blackwell and hellen(?i can’t even remember her name) with the ones in the original series, wadsworth, agent green, damien,,, and the new ones feel like cartoon caricactures compared to how much nuance and depth and humanity the old antagonists were written with

also like,, the more information about the wider atypical world that’s laid out, the less fun and the less sense it makes,,, atypical secret societies are a thing??? and it’s also possible to find atypical communities online??? that just cheapens all of damien’s angst about being alone and not even knowing the word atypical until he met joan,, as well as how the order and the am value keeping knowledge of atypicals top secret, it doesn’t add up

it bothered me how they mentioned it should be impossible to turn a normal person into an atypical when like,, hello??? frank’s right there???

fuck oliver,,, there’s nothing fucking likable about this asshole,,he’s selfish, manipulative, a coward, smug,,, and not even in any charming or sympathetic ways,, he feels super tacked on,,, like he’s only there cuz the bullshit ancienty conspiracy plot demands it and i do not for one second believe any of the characters care about him

mark was just,,, so fucking under utilized,,, the characters always talk up caleb and mark’s brotherly bond, about how much they care for each other and how much he’s helped him out,, that’s really interesting i would actually like to fucking see it please,,, overall mark feels like his main point in this series is to just be an accessory to oliver

what the fuck do you mean that mark considers him his bestfriend?!?!? ano po?? tangina,, sam’s right fucking there,, and oliver has never shown in any genuine that he cares about mark and i don’t fucking see what mark sees in this guy

you know,,, all that fucking forced ship tease between these is literally the final nail in the coffin of my enjoyment of this universe,,, like you’re telling me that these two are actually gonna get together?? fuck that noise good fucking bye i want nothign to do with this series anymore

conclusion: i am just,, completely fucking done with this universe,,, honestly,, normally im not one to hate listen,, if i don’t like something,, i’ll just drop it and say it’s not my thing and move on..and im not one to just angrily yell about it into the void. but i can’t with this show,,, the original show really just meant the world to me,,, it was with me at some of the darkest points in my life and was one of the things that got me through em (cuz hey i can’t afford therapy and this show made a p good substitute at times asdkfljsad)..

i felt so betrayed,,, i really opened up myself to this one for all that. i should’ve learned my lesson after the disaster that was tama,,, the needless killing agent green was an indication of things to come,,, but i was cautiously optimistic for this show,, cuz it seemed they were going back to their roots by doing a story that’s more on just characters learning how to person and talk about their feelings,,, but oh god how badly was i mistaken,, they shoehorned another bs thriller action plotline when the characters by themselves were enough,,, and it seems that this is the direction this universe is taking,,, i want absolutely nothing more to do with,, im gonna unsub to the original feed and just block out all the tags and pretend i never interacted with this franchise in the first place

[angstandhappiness]

DUDE very nice

@user1286 #BRRROOOOO OMGGGG#TH THISSS#TH I S S#T H IS. S S#I Hope they all live wonderful happy lives as a normal functional family#they hurt me (╥_╥)

@valcorybs #NO BECAUSE THE WAY ZEUS RIPPED EVERYTHING FROM THESE PEOPLE#the more i think about it the more i wanna chew through glass#idc kratos was justified in killing zeus idc idc#that bitch had his dumbass son kidnap his other son and traumatized his OTHER son for the rest of his life#forced callisto to not tell either of her kids who their father was#then proceeded to curse her the moment she DID tell Kratos#WHICH FORCED THAT POOR FUCKING MAN TO KILL HIS OWN MOTHER#AFTER HE HAD ALREADY KILLED HIS WIFE AND CHILD#like bro#zeus did everything in his power to be the most killable person in Kratos' life and had the mfing AUDACITY to taunt him multiple times#and look i know Kratos did a lot of terrible things. but.#zeus had it coming

@rhubarbspring #ooough i love them. they all deserved better#they deserved a vacation to crete and laugh and play and eat delicious food ;-;#deimos is just a little baby 🥺 looks so much like atreus#kratos is a strong & protective child and tries to shoulder lots of responsibility - he does so for his family. but he's still a kid 😢#callisto is 🎶A SINGLE MOM WHO WORKS TWO JOBS WHO LOVES HER KIDS AND NEVER STOPS#WITH GENTLE HANDS AND A HEART OF A FIGHTEEER 🎶

@kraptos #FAMILY.

@lokis-wager #haha nothign bad is gonna happen to them :) :) :)#these 2 bois are gonna be best friends forever#they are going to make it throug life safe and happy#*screams and cries and sobs and throws up and shakes*

@dr-carbomb #and then nothing bad happened ever

@supercityboys #then they lived totally normal happy lives#nothing happened to Deimos Castillo Kratos Atreus Lysandra or Calliope#everything horrible and bad did happen to Zeus tho

@conkeybong #what a nice happy family i’m sure absolutely nothing bad will happen to any of them :)

@metallica-requiem #family…

@fahrennheit #little guys!!!!

@dreadfuldevotee #and everyone is happy :)))

@ace-memelord #on my knees begging. scratching under your door for more callisto content

@glados-apologist #aww what a lovely family portrait#surely nothing awful will befall them

@agaygoutguy

Someone get little kratos some shoes!

deimos, callisto, and kratos

[sei-bon]

@rosesinhiseyes do you want to know why i keep tagging you, why i keep sending messages to a fucking wall?

because you refuse to leave my life. I told you i wanted you gone, i told you i wanted to forget all about you. i don’t want to be your friend. who you’ve become is a person i would never befriend.

I want you gone

stop leaving the door open

stop counting on me to reach out again in a moment of weakness.

do you know what that’s doing to me right now? of course i’m still nostalgic and i miss who you used to be. it’s an absolute mindfuck to see two completely opposite people in the same person, to be hurt and abused by someone i loved so much and used to love me in return. I hate thinking about it

i loved you. i do not love you now. i hate you. you ruined my life, you hurt not just me. you hurt my friends, you hurt my son.

you took his mother from him. i will never be able to give him the kind of guidance he needs, the affection he needs .i can’t bear to be hugged by my own child because of what you put me through. i wake him with my crying and screaming in my sleep, and in turn he has a hard time in school, he’s tired and moody. he’s nine years old and he says he wants to die. he picked that up from me and i want to die because of you

first you called me your soulmate

then you said even if we weren’t together life just didn’t feel right without me

when we stopped talking you said you thought about me, you missed me, so on and so forth. you reached out to me when i had already started trying to move on with new friends

you gave me a taste of what things used to be like and of course i was happy that things seemed to be the way they used to be, and we could be friends again

you crossed the line again and  said you wanted to try dating again. i turned you down. i didn’t clearly say why at the time, just that i couldn’t.i wasn’t ready for anything like that, i didn’t have the emotional stability for a relationship, i wanted to be a stronger person before taking on something like that

you started becoming distant, we started fighting again, you started favoring precious @fishtailsushi, whether becuase you knew it hit a nerve with me or because you were actually trying to put her in my place as your best friend because you couldn’t have me. i don’t know why you did it

and i hated her for that. still do. always will. she may not be the catalyst for who you’ve become but she and her company sure did encourage it

anyway, you started acting distant towards me, you were harder on me than your other friends and doing all these little things that i told you were upsetting for me before. I’m sure you conveniently forgot i ever sad a thing. you forget everything so easily... except for your idea of me for some reason. You treated me like shit, you didn’t stand up for me when she’d talk shit but becuase i told her to go for a drive when she was blind drunk... well that just gave you the go-ahead to go harder on your mistreatment.

you didn’t even kick me out immediately. we had an argument that night then didn’t talk for a few days. they you just decided nah don’t want me there. EVEN THOUGH i was close with people in the group becuase you and that precious bitch had a grudge I couldn’t be allowed near anything you cast your light upon

even then, you couldn’t let go of me

i tried to strengthen the bonds with my new friends, talk to them and find my own way

but i guess you missed me because you opened the door again and after having a bad nightmare i reached out to you again and we tried to make a friendship work again

and you said you loved me

a week later you said you felt nothing for me. i was nothing special. i was a casual relationship for you.

and here’s where one of those “little” upsetting things come into play. back when you bragged in call to @justcrossedoverthings about having slept with a lot of people and not needing to be in love with them to do so... well, a bunch of pieces fell into place the wall i’d put up to forget about what happened between us

the more you mistreated me, the bigger the cracks grew, but it was still contained. I kept telling myself you loved me, you wouldn’t hurt me (even though at that point in time you already caused an immeasurable amount of pain)

but in the end, you said you didn’t love me and i was just a misguided fling, and i should have known that

funny though, i didn’t think the word soulmate and fling were interchangeable

but yeah... you didn’t need love to fuck someone.

you didn’t need their consent either

I tried so hard to paint my rape into some grand gesture of affection. surely jeremi must love me if he’s doing this. i wouldn’t want to break his heart. i don’t want this, but i do want his love. i don’t want to lose jeremi. this is something i would have had to do sooner or later. i should be grateful. jeremi loves me.

“jeremi loves me” that’s the mantra that kept me going

when i did what pleased you i heard it a lot, that you loved me.

but when i needed you to tell me how much you loved me, you wouldn’t, you’d push me away. i felt so alone and the one person i loved most couldn’t even tell me “val, i love you. don’t worry, you can get through this. *we* can get through this.” no, you left me to die.

you threw me away and tried to fill the void with new people

i still told myself that you loved me... but i started to think that maybe you didn’t, maybe you never did, maybe i was just a fling. i tried to ignore the latter. even when we weren’t talking. jeremi loves me. we are no longer friends but jeremi still loves me

but we did become friends again. jeremi loved me. jeremi loved me a lot

i think you were just craving affection and knew you could get it out of me, but the feelign wasn’t mutual.

but yeah, when you said you didn’t love me, i had to  face what had happened. I was just part of your tally, you weren’t in love with me, but i was real easy to  trick, you’d already planted the seeds to get me eating out of your hand. i trusted you, even though you already crossed the lines i drew

you crossed more and more. and when we fought about those lines you made me feel liek absolute shit for having them drawn in the first place. because if we’re so close i shouldn’t need to have any boundaries. that’s what you tried to make me believe. and it felt wrong

i told you i didn’t have an interest in sex. I told you that quite a few times before your visit. i cried over the phone becuase i was afraid you wouldn’t want to be with me becuase i couldn’t have sex. but none of that ended up mattering, something so important to me was of no concern to you. what you want, you get and nothing i could say or do was going to stop you. it didn’t in teh past and it wasn’t going to in that moment. it was do things your way or lose you.

i didn’t want to have sex, jeremi. I didn’t want you to touch me that way. I didn’t want to shower with you. i didn’t want to send you nudes, i didn’t want to sext you

but i did want to make you happy, so you would still love me and already i learned that it made no difference if i said no

but you said you loved me, so i did my best to excuse it and be a good girlfriend

i’ve had nightmares about your visit for a long time. whenever i told you i had a dream about you, it was a nightmare i was trying to look at in a positive light. you did what you did becuase you loved me so much you couldn’t control yourself, i should be happy

but you said you didn’t love me and the comforting lie i told myself to endure everything ended up being... a lie

i begged you to love me and you just looked down on me. desperation is so unbecoming and repulsive. no one like me is deserving of your attention

so you cast me out again. if it wasn’t for the supposrt of the new friends i made, i would have killed myself after that.

but it was hard to come to terms with everything that i’d kept repressed. i couldn’t stop thinking about what you did to me, what other’s have done to me throughout my life. I had everything tucked away and was able to ignore it for a good long time but you, you were the straw that broke the camel’s back

i have to confront a lifetime of sexual abuse because of you.

i have to somehow accept that i can never do anything about the abusers in my past

i have to somehow accept that they are still out and about, probably hurting more people and there’s nothign i can do about it

i have to accept that in the grand scheme of things they probably don’t feel a lick of remorse for the pain they inflicted on me. they probably don’t remember me at all

but i can never forget them, i wish i could. i wish i could forget you

you’ve always left communication open hoping i’d see things your way and come back. not because you really want me but because you can’t stand someone walking away, and it makes you look like the good guy to leave the door open, or maybe you knew my lingering feelings would break my resolve to go on without you and i’d come running back begging for another chance

I sure did make a fool of myself doing that so often and i know i’m a creature of habit so i may very well do it again

i’m afraid of that breakdown, another fight, wounds being salted.

i wanted this to be the very end, no more contact between us, i wanted the door to stay closed. you can’t be trusted.

yeah, i asked you to put me on your static and back in the discord, to be a part of your group, to never be alone with you because that’s when things get bad. that’s what i wanted from you.

but you wanted to keep me a secret

yet you wanted to be a part of a group that told you to your face that they hated you. you wanted me to let you in anyway and i almost agreed to it. but i wanted the same from you, to be a part of what i used to belong to and you wouldn’t, you insisted that i couldn’t be involved with anybody you knew, and they couldn’t know that you were even speaking to me

i had to be a secret

i’m not keeping any more secrets

I’m not hiding anything, certainly not for your sake

I’d thought to, for a time. i thought about how taking legal action would affect you, your family, your our friends. could i really go through with this? maybe there’s still a chance to mend things, maybe he didn’t mean what he said, maybe he still loved me

and i reached out to you again, i told you what i was planning to do

i told you how much i was hurting, how i dreaded going forward with my case. i wanted my best friend back, but i couldn’t just accept the pain you caused while you offer to treat me as a second class acquaintance at best. I didn’t want to stick around just becuase you don’t liek to lose.

i’ve already lost so much becuase of you and you wanted me to just lie down and accept that you raped me and there was nothing i could do about it, shit happens and you can’t help it because that behavior was “normalized” for you. i at least wanted you to grant me something so i didn’t feel so cheap

to let me back into the discord and onto your static. a pittance.

but you can’t give me that. nothing i ask for

i asked you to help me pay for my medication and counseling to treat the wounds you gave me as an alternative

but according to you that was extortion

your hands were tied

you offered me... what was it? you offered to buy me monster hunter world?

you offered to buy me a game. a game was supposed to make up for all this grief you’ve caused. a game was supposed to be enough to make everything better. you absolutely obliterated my dignity and a game i didn’t even want was a fair trade in your book.

thank you, jeremi. i didn’t think i could feel any cheaper but god you just know all the right ways to fuck me up don’t you?

you did this to me before too, one of our earlier breakups you said you went ahead and bought me stormblood and sent me the code. i think i told you to leave me alone for a while so i could work through my feelings a few days prior to that. i was reluctant to accept it but i thought it couldn’t hurt, maybe i can work through this and keep a good friendship with you

nope.

you fucking pulled at my heartstrings and i got back with you again

the same thing happened when we started playing black desert together after yet another split

it happened again after i got into mabinogi with you, but that time i had the audacity to turn you down

but given this pattern why the fuck would i accept another game from you just to be hurt again when i’m even more vulnerable and far more unstable than i was when i first turned you down.

i can’t trust you

even during our conversation last week. i started off with “why haven’t you blocked me,” “ i hate you” and such. i hurled every insult i could at you and i meant it. but you almost had me, you still managed to melt my heart and almost win me over but i started asking questions because this was too good to be true, and it was.

you worded things in a way that almost made me believe you were giving me what i wanted. but no, it was giving you what you wanted and i was going to end up hurt

you’re so manipulative. for better or worse, i’ve gotten burned enough times that i started questioning the “peace offer” instead of blindly accepting it.

that’s about when you started losing it and striking back at me because oh poor baby isn’t getting his way and the mask is starting to slip.

so now you’‘re doing this whole grand fuck you gesture of not talkign to me but refusing to block me

and keeping logs of the whole thing

well, good for you jeremi. have fun with it. like i said , i have nothing to hide. I’m going to fight back and there’s nothing you can do about it. you can’t silence me, you can’t cover up what’s happened

it doesn’t feel good to be powerless, does it?

it feels really really shitty huh?

I’d ask you to think about how I felt but it’s beyond your capability to think of anyone but yourself but rest assured that what you’re feeling doesn’t even come close to what I have barely lived through

if you could have gotten over yourself and at least indulged my final request to block me on all fronts, so i could actually move on I would have continued my fight quietly at least.

but you never actually gave a fuck whether i moved on or not, you just need to have your way. which for some fucked up reason includes having me in your life. And I’m not allowed to die becuase it’s not what you want.

like

listen, my dude. the bullshit you’re pulling right now makes me want to kill myself even more

i wish you would just fucking block me so i will never be tempted to look back

i don’t want to live knowing you’re still trying to hang on in some fucked up way, it fucks with me, i can’t even live for myself because you’re the one tellign me to live. why the fuck should i be here to please you while you hurt me?

you’re goign to spite me to the very end so i may as well do the same

fuck you jeremi, my blood is on your hands and i’m going to make sure everyone knows what you’ve done

to my friends, I’m sorry. I hope you can forgive me. I didn’t mean to waste your time and love. I appreciate the kindness you’ve all shown me. I tried my best to make it through this. i’m sorry. I love you guys, and I hope life is kind to you, you deserve the best.

to my friends that still associate with jeremi. you deserve so much better. don’t let him drag you down like he did to me. Don’t let him put someone else through this

-Sei/Seiko/Valerie

[hopefor-days-backup]

11 Questions

Wow, I got tagged by @slightlyflammable to do this eleven questions thing! Thank you for the tag!  

The rules are: 

✰ post the rules 

✰ answer the questions given to you by the tagger 

✰ write eleven questions of your own 

✰ tag eleven people  

Now here are the questions….

If you were a mermaid/man, what color would your tail be? I think my tail would probably be blue. like a nice pastel blue or something

What were you obsessed with as a child? Honestly, history? I loved the Titanic as a kid (not even the movie, I just loved learning about the irl Titanic). Also the Civil War was fascinating to me. When I was 4, my mom, Grandma and I took a trip to Pennsylvania and we went to Gettysburg. Then we went to Hershey Park (i.e. Hershey chocolate) after because I was a toddler and I told my mom that I wanted to go back to Gettysburg, you if that doesn’t tell you I should pursue my history major, I don’t know what does

What book/novel/comic will you always recommend to others? I’m always partial to the Harry Potter series just because that’s what got me so into reading to begin with. I also like to recommend Carry On by Rainbow Rowell becase it’s almost like gay Harry Potter but it’s also its also its own thing? Also, the webcomic Check,Please! 

If you could transform into an animal which one would it be? Probs a cat. it would be so chill to just lay around all the time and have people adore me

What time do you try and go to bed at normally? And what time do you end up going to bed at? I try to go to bed at around 11, but honestly it always ends up closer to 1am 

Whats a subject you wish you were good at? English. I mean, I write a lot (or I try to anyway) and I’ve been told I’m good. But it’s more the technical stuff that I struggle with? I never do well with technical rea\search papers, or assignments where absolutely perfect grammar is key. I hate it. I don’t want to write absolutely perfectly because there’s no voice to it. It sounds too robotic. I can’t do it. I just wish I’d at least be able to pretend I can write like that so those assignments won’t drag my grades down.

What is a piece of advice you got that will always stick with you? One of the biggest things is never do something because you think it will make someone else happy. Do it for yourself. That mentality has honestly saved me. I don’t dress for anyone else, I don’t wear make-up to impress someone else. I wear what I want and do my make-up because I enjoy it and it makes me feel nice. Full stop. Just don’t give a fuck about what anyone else thinks. 

Book/movie/tv show you were scared of as a child but have read/watched now? Nothign really comes to mind, but I guess Nightmare on Elm Street? I love horror movies, but the first time I watched tht one I couldn’t fall alseep because I could have sworn I heard someone walking down the hall towards my bedroom while dragging their nails along the wall. I thought Freddy was going to kill me. Still love the movie though

How many siblings do you have if any? (Pets can count) My parents are divorced so I have one step-sister (with my mom), two step-brothers and two half-sisters (all with my father) (also we have five cats, two dogs, and 2 fish at my mom’s)

Fairy lights or no? HELL FUCKIN’ YEAH!!!! (seriously I have so many fairly lights in my room)

Did you say “I love you” first to someone or someone said it to you? (not including family members) I said “I love you” first to the boyfriend I had my sophomore year of high school. He panicked and didn’t say it back, then broke up with me a week later. Then started dating one of my best friends about a month after that (conclusion? men ain’t shit)

And now for my questions…

If you could meet anyone on this earth (dead or alive), who would it be?

Do you beleive in ghosts? What about aliens? (Or any cryptid, I guess?)

What’s a song that has always made you happy when you hear it? 

What would you want to be written on your tombstone? 

Do you have any strange phobias? 

How do you vent your anger? 

Do you have a collection of anything? (Or did you have a collection of something when you were a kid?) 

What would you want your life to be like? As in, what’s your pipe dream? What is the one thing in life you would love to achieve even if you think it’ll never happen, but you love to daydream about it anyway? (Winning the Olympics, writing the next big novel, starring in a movie, singing on Broadway, etc) 

What’s the worst place you’ve ever been to? 

What is your absolute favorite thing to do in your free time? 

Have you ever seen a movie so bad but secretly you love it for some reason? What was it?

Gosh, now I don’t know who to tag... I don’t really talk to a lot of people on here so I don’t know who would want to do this. I guess if you see this and want to do it, feel free. Especially if we’re mutuals. And if anyone decides to do it, please tag me? I’d love to see what answers y’all have to my questions. Thanks! 

[minhyukie]

kihyuk time? :o kihyun and minhyuk are truly best friends and love each other so much... they tease each other so much but you can tell it really comes from love

HELLO.. KIHYUK TIME :D I LOVE THEIR FRIENDSHIP SO MUCH i think it’s more obvious recently than ever that the way minhyuk really shows his love is through his teasing and u know who he Absolutely loves to tease the most.. u know it one mister Yoo Kihyun but it goes both ways FKLDSFDS I LOVE IT they can really just Roast the fuck out of each other and neither of them is even phased bc they really just.. have such a fundamentally strong understanding of each other and their emotions u can just tell... one thing that will always stick with me are the interviews where they actually talk intimately abt one another like where mx was asked to give strengths and weaknesses of each member and kihyun gave the most thoughtful and elegant responses for both for minhyuk? about how he thinks so much for fans but that he overthinks things and that he hopes minhyuk wont think too hard and worry too much about everything.. andt he fucking second anniversary video.. where minhyuk has that sad shy little smile as he talks about everything kihyun does for mx... :-( THEY JUST understand each other on such a deep level that the teasing rly means nothign godjkfdsf im so far off topic anyway back to the message yes FKJLDSFJDSFDSFDSFDS THE BATHROOM VIDEO.. STFUSUFDS THAT WAS OS FUNNY WHAT MAKES IT EVEN FUNNIER IS ?? KIHYUN NOT EVEN KNOWING MINHYUK POSTED IT.. WHEN THEY MENTIONED IT AT A FANSIGN AND HE WAS LIKE ?? HOW DID U GUYS KNOW ABOUT THIS :o ?? im cryingdgfd and PLEASE any picture of them being soft.. i kno the exact one ur talking about it’s so Rare but those moments really make my heart pound out of my chest i love these two boys so much they rly have the most Interesting dynamic to me if u can’t tell from this fuckin mini essay i wrote they’re so funnie and im happy they’re best friends:(

love night!! send love about mx!!

[misterbitches]

mate i love this post cos same. while im not opposed to anything with YZT i am opposed to having him being in love and moving on without somehow owning it. because he didnt apologize... and that really dampens their rship (in a good way but again the breakup should have been interspersed and they should have taken it seriously if they added it) i would absolutely never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever EVER EVER forgive him and on top of that being like "oh yea itll work bc he's like still obsessed with me" girl is he bc he was sobbing when u came back? thats the thing they should have made it clear that what he did WAS FUCKED UP like even if a person doesn't have a mental illness or w/e that whole scenario would still fuck you up. for 7 fucking years, not contacting, and then being like "yes, i need to come back bc he's traumatized and EYE will fix it" and it is gross it is so infuriating bc it's so fucked up to do that esp knowing how at home yu zhen was and then u have him come back like he's doing something????? nOTHING HES DOING NOTHIGN AT ALL!!!! all this showed me is that he's narcisstic and i want to beat his ass like no maam and ur right did he even like him? like lmao u didnt love him ya weirdo the fuck!??!?! it's red flags i hope his next mans checks him or something bECAUSE also how the fuck r u gonna talk abt yr own love u know what....UGH

spoilers for ep. 12 of Be Loved In House: I Do below, and a rant against the whole character of Yi Zi Tong

okay so yi tong might’ve helped shi lei/yu zhen get together but i still hate that smarmy arsehole. Like what was the point of him even?? gang could’ve just locked them in a closet together and not let them out until they communicated. did the show really have to go this route? i just—the more i think about the plot, the more my head hurts. (like he might have been confident in predicting how yu zhen would think & act but…what if yu zhen decided to step aside?? did he think it through if he failed??? or was he just so confident in himself that the idea of failure never crossed his mind??)

also unpopular opinion but… i def do not want a second season focused on zi tong (or his boyfriend Golden). like why is his character good or deserving to be the main focus in this hypothetical second season???

like he never apologized to yu zhen for just, apparently, packing up and leaving. and i know the coma thing wasn’t his fault and maybe he showed some concern when he heard about it, but his character reeks so much of self-centeredness that i can’t help but want to throw the whole character in the trash. like start over with a likeable character who doesn’t make me go ‘ughhh this guy again’. like how are u just going to leave that pure ray of sunshine and dorkiness and THEN HAVE THE AUDACITY TO SHOW UP SEVEN YEARS LATER as if nothing happened and with a new boyfriend in tow??? methinks zi tong didn’t take the relationship all that seriously which is the true reason i hate him. u don’t deserve that man and thankfully he has someone new to appreciate him, so u can just leave again, sir, preferably somewhere very far away, like maybe the Arctic.

are we supposed to like him??? why??? just bc he didn’t, in actuality, end up a homewrecker??? i’m sorry i’m gonna need more than the bare minimum. he isn’t all that fleshed out either which is the fault of the episodes themselves, so he can’t be fully blamed for that, unfortunately.

i just wish the show had the courage to make him a true villain. like someone who kicked puppies for fun and stole candy from little kids…just go all in on the evilness. don’t hold back, make him a true Bond villain, at least then it’d be entertaining, not whatever this was.

(look idek what it is about the character but he makes me irrationally angry…i can’t apologize for my feelings; they are what they are. if some ppl like the character, then they like him. i’m just baffled as to why.)

[shybright]

blues may be a giant fucking asshole when it comes to certain things and he can be rlly rlly selfish but he wants nothign more than to make his loved ones happy, and would do absolutely anything to let them know that and to keep them happy

[qqueenofhades]

okay SO. i just finished catching up on season 2 of lucifer and hilARY. HILARY I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS OKAY?? AND SINCE UR THE RESIDENT LUCIFER TRASH ON MY DASH, I AM COMING TO YOU. alright. dude. so. initially in season 1, i actually didn't really like deckerstar because it felt like so rushed to me? its like they knew each other instantly and i like watching a friendship develop from something to nothign yknow. bUT. BUT THEN SEASON 2 HAPPENED OKAY. LET ME TELL YOU. its like at a point (1/?)

where iduno everything kinda pieced together for me narratively. and like their relationship finally seemed believable to me. and WOOP DE DOO THERE THEY ARE. TOTALLY IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER. BUT THINGS GET IN THE WAY. AND NOW LUCIFER IS GONE AND I KNOW WHY THE WRITERS ARE DOING THIS BUT ALSO I HATE IT BECAUSE FUCK MAN. CHLOE IS SO READY FOR IT AND NOW HE'S HELLA SCARED AND NEEDS TIME TO PROCESS ALL THIS SHIT BUT HE CAN'T TELL CHLOE THAT HE'S IMMORTAL NO LESS THE DEVIL BC THAT WILL FUCK UP (2/?)             

ALL THE SHIT. ALL OF IT. and AND MAMA CHARLOTTE. i actually kinda really loved her?? like yea she was manipulative as hell but she was doing it out of both love for her son and desperation?? like lucifer hit the nail on the head with his last convo with her and like fuck man. i kinda want her to stay?? and like actually TRY to be a mom to him and Amenediel yknow? which like AMENEDIEL. ON THAT NOTE. IS LIKE. SO GOOD. FALLEN ANGEL PART 2. HE'S SO SELFISH IN SOME WAYS (LIKE SOMEONE ELSE (3/?)             

WE KNOW??) BUT LIKE DAMN IF HE WASN'T THERE FOR HIS BROTHER WHEN PUSH CAME TO SHOVE. and to be fair to him, Lucifer could've totally been there for him when he first found out he had fallen yknow? but he wasn't and so Amenediel was basically forced to do it on his own and then mama bear comes along so like OFC HE'S STICKING WITH HER. i JUST WANT THE TWO BROTHERS TO LIKE. BE THERE FOR EACH OTHER. LIKE MAZE IS FOR LUCIFER. and speaking of her - i am SO SO glad she's made friends?? and that  (4/?)             

the writers are treating her like a multidimensional character. especially considering she's a POC. like as a POC myself that makes me soo hopeful?? because its not all about how she's this "sexy demon". but she's been written as human too! she has a sense of self and a life outside Lucifer finally and thAT SEEN WITH TRIXIE. LIKE FUCK YES. however. HOW. EVER. i think at the moment my all time fav right now. like my beautiful cinnamon roll is linda. WONDERFUL THERAPIST LINDA. WHO IS NOW IN (5?)            

THE MIDDLE OF COSMIC DRAMA AND IS LIKE TOTALLY BAFFLED AND IN A GIGGLEFEST AT THE SAME TIME. I FREAKING LOVE IT MAN. like that scene where they're all talking about Lucifer going to hell to get the poison formula and then he just looks over and is like WHAT U THINK MY HUMAN FRIEND? *pans to Linda* ugh. GOLD. GOLDDDDD. like i know that she's supposed to be us, the audience. but fuck. like. A+++ writers. and her and Maze's friendship?? i AM LIVING O KAY. LIVVVINGGGGG (6/7)     

alright i think im done. im sry if that was alot. i have the honour of being your obedient servant, tifidotpants *sings in a hamilton-y way* // crawls back into my hole (7/7)             

okay I have been pretty much totally offline for the last few days, so I am just getting home and catching up now aND YES

Honestly, one of the things I loved the best about Deckerstar in season 1 is that they seemed to have always known each other, despite snark and sass and Chloe trying to get rid of him. They just clicked, they fit into each other’s lives perfectly because (soulmates destined by god holla) and made each other better, even if they didn’t understand how and neither of them were ready for things to turn romantic. But I absolutely feel you on season 2 being the season where things just started to fall into place and click on a deeper and richer and more satisfying level. That was where the surface appearances/apparent cliches of s1 got deconstructed and explored and broadened, and you just sit there like oOOOOHHHHH I GET IT NOW. BRAVO. BRAVO SIRS AND MA’AMS MAY I HAVE SOME MORE.

Because as you point out, the character development all around is phenomenal. Maze gets an entire arc/motives/feelings/life/friends of her own. Linda goes from essentially comic relief to the wisest and in some ways, bravest character on the show (and everyone’s mom friend). Dan and Lucifer of all people have a brotp. Mama Charlotte is cray cray and a wrecking ball, but we still kinda want her to figure things out and be a real mother to her scared idiot (but so so pretty) sons. We want to bang Chloe and Lucifer’s heads together (especially Lucifer’s) and get them to figure out the depths of their feelings for each other and to YOUR FATHER DAMMIT LUCIFER, MAKE GOOD CHOICES. COME ON JUST TRYYYYY. I LOVE YOU BUT WHYYYYYY.

(I am also weeeeeeeakkkkkk for the fallen angel brothers and my need to see them having each other’s backs and Amenadiel being there for Lucifer and maybe Lucifer could try being there for him, this entire relationship hurts my soul a lot. A LOT.)

CAN THE REST OF THE SEASON JUST GET HERE ALREADY I WOULD LIKE THAT A LOT.

YEP.

[nickatnightwalker-blog]

@bythepowerof4  in depth discussion of daisys every weakness and the responsibilities of power

bythepowerof4 hey question that ive been too nervous to ask in public: do people eat people here cause thats uh pretty mega fucked up?

nickatnightwalker honestly ive been running on the assumption that they do since theres like vampires and shit?

bythepowerof4 not to bring the mood down lol ill keep it light when we're hanging ;) oh

bythepowerof4 yeah shit

nickatnightwalker yeah shit

bythepowerof4 i havent been out here at night much so i havent seen em whoops

nickatnightwalker im familiar with a few but ive been trying to get my room to swiss bank status so we can chill there if youre worried

bythepowerof4 that sounds very excellent do you not have a roomie?? i got saddled with another newbie like straight away

nickatnightwalker nah, no roomie there's still a lot of empty dorms in my hall too

bythepowerof4 youre in the humany dorm right?? thats not very comforting lol

nickatnightwalker yyyyyyyyyyyyeah i know right where are you?

bythepowerof4 uhhhh proteus!!

nickatnightwalker which one is that

bythepowerof4 with the shapeshifty people i think?? total bull

nickatnightwalker doyou shapeshift?

bythepowerof4 uh not really? only once but i guess it looks like i am to everyone else? im not sure on the specifics

nickatnightwalker thats baffling you said stuff but to me it still means nothing

bythepowerof4 when we meet up you can judge for yourself, tell me if my form looks permeable and mutable to you or whatever lmao i was told we werent supposed to ask about this stuff :p

nickatnightwalker fromwho? i always wanna know

nickatnightwalker ort you woah sorry i hate tumblr

bythepowerof4 ???

nickatnightwalker yeah i didnt mean to send that lmao

bythepowerof4 lol uh i think it was, headsarolling, whoever that is, and the guy with the little cartoon smoker for an icon?? who got all defensive abt their supermatural shit

nickatnightwalker oh the headless kid is kind of a dick

bythepowerof4 hey also this might sound weird wait what

nickatnightwalker yeah?

bythepowerof4 headless????

nickatnightwalker headsarolling has no head

bythepowerof4 is that a thing oh my god

nickatnightwalker yeah yep thats what i said

bythepowerof4 ok for my own sanity im not gonna dwell on that ok ANYWAY

nickatnightwalker yeah bring it

bythepowerof4 could you. bring me my shoes back

nickatnightwalker sorry what

bythepowerof4 my shoes. daisy took my shoes

nickatnightwalker i am not surprised

bythepowerof4 which was ok at the time because she mustve had a pretty shit night with the uh, fire, and being propositioned by count freakmeout, but its been a while and i still dont have my shoes

nickatnightwalker ok yeah i can do that

bythepowerof4 ok cool thanks im sure she was kidding about her room being some mysterious death chamber but i dont wanna risk it

nickatnightwalker nah it kinda is but i can get through

bythepowerof4 lol spousal privilege does wonders ;)

nickatnightwalker actually we decided to not get married and live in sin for a while

bythepowerof4 best way to live obviously

nickatnightwalker i mean, you're only young once right

bythepowerof4 right!! enjoy it while you're both young soon enough youll be sitting in a dive bar complaining bout the ol ball and chain. time flies its a drag

bythepowerof4 hey we can real talk for a second right??

nickatnightwalker yeah im

nickatnightwalker kind of baked but hit me with it

bythepowerof4 ok obviously youre not actually dating daisy or if you are its like?? some weirdo casual shit so like my concerns are twofold 1. what is she like, into 2. is she actually as fucking terrifying as she was at that fight or was that like, for show

nickatnightwalker 1.  idk who she's into atm she's mysterious like that 2.  yes shes always like that you just kind of learn to roll with it sometimes she chills

bythepowerof4 ok. um

bythepowerof4 you know what i actually dont know what to do with this information but thanks

nickatnightwalker youre welcome she likes unicorns

bythepowerof4 not sure how to figure that into my approach but thats weirdly cute?

nickatnightwalker shes cute her eyes are far apart

nickatnightwalker she spins when shes happy

bythepowerof4 yeah wow

nickatnightwalker sometimes shes happy for bad reasons she was sitting on ins

bythepowerof4 thats not ominous at all

nickatnightwalker you just have ot tell her no very serioiusly it's hard

bythepowerof4 yeah i can see how that would be difficult youre like her little jiminy cricket tho thats so sweet

nickatnightwalker it's a heavy burden to bear

bythepowerof4 we gotta do what we gotta do does this burden come automatically with asking her out though id kinda wanna be more casual

nickatnightwalker no one can do it but im im the chosen one

bythepowerof4 on behalf of the student body id like to thank you for your sacrifice

nickatnightwalker youe welcome it's hard to be bufy the vampireslayer

bythepowerof4 oh, all those beautiful vampire boys lusting after you and your tight leather pants, must be such a nightmare!!

nickatnightwalker it is truely truely a nightmare andas far as i  know  leatherpants are not a part of this equation

bythepowerof4 youre such a poser dude did you even make it to season six?? early 00s fashion disasters abound, leather clad legs akimbo

nickatnightwalker rihgt no thats right season 6

nickatnightwalker i watched that????

bythepowerof4 lmao, if you need a refresher im ready and willing

nickatnightwalker i marathoned it l ast week it suddenly got so relevant\

bythepowerof4 lol ur telling me

nickatnightwalker listen listen i tried to kss one

bythepowerof4 wait a fucking second im slow ok but are you?? referring to mr byron?? FUCK

nickatnightwalker whom

bythepowerof4 dude!!!

nickatnightwalker o h what everyone makesmistakes everyonehas those days

bythepowerof4 you dont wanna be dinner right youre doing a piss poor job of staying away from vampires aka the most likely people to kill you everybody knows what what im talkin bout everybody gets that way

nickatnightwalker thank you you get it i didnt know how can thi sbe bmy fault

bythepowerof4 didnt he brag on night one how good he is at like, rending flesh from bone or something like i figured he was full of shit but its still a red flag mate

nickatnightwalker didnt know who he was trust me i wouldnt have com neAR that face

bythepowerof4 lmao youve got some shit luck huh

nickatnightwalker unnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnbelievably daisyll kill hiim if hekills me though

nickatnightwalker vengeance from beyond the grave

bythepowerof4 hey bro pact if im ever about to get all up on someone who wants to taste my still beating heart or whatever please stop me aww cute!! avenging each others death is some really good bonding shit very um

nickatnightwalker i will absolutely stop you

bythepowerof4 hamlet i think

nickatnightwalker that was his dad

bythepowerof4 oh thanks (: oh ok gotcha

nickatnightwalker mnot related to daisy

nickatnightwalker not my dad or my uncle

bythepowerof4 bro pact if i ever misquote shakespeare in front of ur not dad or uncle please stop me i get the feeling its a deal breaker

nickatnightwalker oh my god is it ever if you dont know what shes saying sometimes its quotes she quotes a lot when she doesnt know what to say also cute

bythepowerof4 lmao very

nickatnightwalker very

nickatnightwalker you know what she

nickatnightwalker also makes this face like when you fuck up a quote?? her nose

bythepowerof4 im guessing you do it constantly and unapologetically then lol

nickatnightwalker no i dont misquote

bythepowerof4 woow sorry mr walker!! how dare i suggest otherwise

nickatnightwalker its ok i undersatnd

bythepowerof4 youre so forgiving!! damian is a very lucky undead creature of the night (:

nickatnightwalker why

bythepowerof4 i was kinda saying like "hes lucky to have you" but that might be a bit mean sorry :/

nickatnightwalker he has nothign

bythepowerof4 lol glad to hear it

nickatnightwalker youre welcome ame same

bythepowerof4 wait a fucking second am i the only person both awake and sober how did you let this happen

nickatnightwalker things progressed byond my control

bythepowerof4 suck it up chosen one!! power is control or something like that