#he is just a funny guy he should have lived
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MINE - ěľě°ě¤ ËËË â¸â¸
ŕ¨ŕ§: ""mother fucker... " yeonjun snarled under his breath, trying to get a glance of the jackass who had the nerve to approach and even touch his girl. he felt his blood begin to boil, coursing through his body like wildfire. he normally was never like this. "
đź pairing! - fratboy boyfriend!yeonjun x fem!reader
đź warnings! meandom!yeonjun, whinysub!reader, ass smacking, big dick yeonjun, unprotected sex, breeding kink if you squint, slut shaming, groping, yeonjun referred as jjunie by reader, yeonjun calls reader baby, slut, and whore
đź lexi adds! - I dont know how I've been able to finish TWO stories in the span of two days but ye enjoy frat boy yeonjun !! ŕźź;´ŕźŕşś Ű ŕźŕşśŕź˝ (i was too impatient to let the poll end) anyways merry christmas to anyone who celebrates!! hopefully you enjoy this gift
the party was supposed to be like any other, or at least that's what yeonjun thought it would be.
his parties were the most popular; everyone would be showing up, dressed to impress as the house was lit with bright shining colorful lights and loud music. good thing the music wasn't loud enough to wake the neighbours
yeonjun stood near the door, greeting guests one by one as they entered just as a good party host should do. maybe yeonjun's cool and funny yet approachable demeanour was the reason he became the most popular guy in college.
just because he was a fratboy didn't mean he was rude and distant like the rest. yeonjun was quite the opposite. thats the exact reason why you fell for him the same day you met him. it was only your first day in college, yet yeonjun talked to you as if he had known you for years, giving you a warm welcome as your upper classmate.
you definitely fell hard for him, but yeonjun fell even harder. he loved you so damn much, all of the small things you did reminded him why he fell for you. he just couldn't handle himself
whenever he threw these parties, he made sure your body was protected from any creeps who were trying to get a free show out of you. this time, it didnt really go as yeonjun wanted it to.
his eyes were looking around trying to find you amidst the crowd of people who were dancing inbetween the living and dining room. at the same time that he was searching, he was rejecting girls who tried flirting with him, giving them a quick "I have a girlfriend." after each of their attempts.
one girl in particular just wouldn't leave yeonjun alone, continuing to flirt and try to seduce him even after his polite rejects. yeonjun decided to stand up and go search for you but before he could walk toward the crowd, the girl stopped him, her hands running up and down his chest in a seductive manner.
"where are you going, jjun? stay with me, yeah? I promise you a good time~" she spoke, her voice full of lust and her eyes hinting desire.
yeonjun began to grow impatient his anger starting to get the best of him as he attempted to push her away lightly. oh but she wouldn't budge, staying put in her place and not wanting to leave yeonjun.
yeonjun chuckled nervously as the girl smirked with mischief. his eyes darted around the room, finally landing on you, and a guy...?
were his eyes playing with him? uncertain of what he was seeing, he blinked rapidly, trying to reset his vision.
he opened his eyes and looked again, the guy was still there yet this time, his hands were on you.
"mother fucker... " yeonjun snarled under his breath, trying to get a glance of the jackass who had the nerve to approach and even touch his girl. he felt his blood begin to boil, coursing through his body like wildfire. he normally was never like this.
that was when yeonjun lost it.
he pushed the girl aside a bit roughly, causing her to curse at him, but yeonjun didn't care. that's not what was on his mind at the moment. his only goal was to make sure you were safe.
he made his way through the crowd, finally finding himself infront the you and the guy.
"what the fuck do you think you're doing touching my girl as if she were yours?" yeonjun asked sternly before grabbing the guy by the shoulder and turning him to see his face.
the guy had the nerve to smirk at him, not caring to hear yeonjun's question. he kept his hand on your thigh which wasn't unnoticed by yeonjun. he looked at you, your eyes clearly showing discomfort.
that was all yeonjun needed. he grabbed you by your waist, catching you by surprise and you yelp. "jjunie!"
before you could say anything thing else, your lips were against his in a searing kiss, his tongue invading your mouth and dancing with yours. the guy could only watch in jealousy as yeonjun's hands dragged down along your hips and gripped your ass.
"whatever man, fuck you." the guy spoke for the last time before leaving the party completely.
yeonjun broke the kiss as you both pant to catch your breath. "that 'outta show that fucker."
"thank you, he was making me really uncomfortable... " you spoke warmly, pressing your head lovingly against his chest.
yeonjun signalled the dj for a microphone before speaking in a blunt tone, "party's over, go home."
the crowd awed in unison before obeying and grabbing their stuff to leave. you sit on the couch with yeonjun as you watch everyone leave. yeonjun's still hugging you with his arms wrapped around your shoulder, his grip tight. when a particular girl leaves she looks at you with a snarl. confused you turn to yeonjun who just kisses you in the same rough manner again.
after the party's officially over, yeonjun leads you to your shared bedroom, the room only really clean room in the whole house.
yeonjun sighs and runs a hand through his hair. "that fucker had me all worked up, what a piece of shit..." he huffs out, voice still hinting of anger. "baby, you would do anything to calm me down, right?"
"of course! why do you ask?" you questioned him innocently as you sat on the soft bed. he answered your question with a lustful glare in his eyes.
â¸â¸
"hmph-! jjunie, too fast! ah-!" you cried out pathetically, gripping onto the duvet sheets under you as yeonjun pounded into you mercilessly.
"shut up, slut." he spat out harshly before smacking your ass, causing you to yelp with tears soaking the bed. "all you do is whine and complain. I bet you liked it when he was touching you, didn't you?" he huffed while quickening his pace.
"you're going too fast oh god-!" just as you whimper and whine, you feel your head get yanked back by the hair, your scalp burning deliciously.
"what did I just say, whore? you don't ever tell me what to do. know your place shit-..." he groans and uses your hair as a way to pound even faster than before. "take it! you know you can, slut. your hole was made for dick." he says this as you pussy clenches and gushes around his cock.
"jjunie! 'gonna cum fuckfuckfuck! please, let me cum!" you plead as you feel the knot in your stomach tighten. his grip on your ass tightens too as he chases his high as well.
"fuck! that's it baby, cum on my cock like the good little whore you are! that fucker wishes this were him." just as you thought he couldn't go any faster, he does.
right as his pace increases you cum on his cock, moaning out his name in a high pitched manner. "jjunie!!"
yeonjun keeps going, you could hear him huff and groan softly behind you as he continues to fuck into your spent cunt.
"you want me to cum inside? want me to claim and mark you with my cum?" you're too fucked dumb on his cock to understand what he's implying and just agree.
"yesyesyes! jjunie please-! i need it!" you mewl and grip the sheets with all your might before you hear yeonjun curse behind you
"fuck-! take it, baby!" he groans out, plunging completely i side of you, shooting out his white sticky cum into your womb, getting the perfect angle. he leans toward you, his lips right at your ear "you wouldn't get mad if you get pregnant, right baby?"
you shake your head, feeling worn out, "not at all..." he kisses your shoulder and grips your chin to make you face him.
"good, that's what I like to hear..."
đź taglist! - empty! (lmk if you want to be added for future works please and thank you!!)
#txt hard thoughts#txt hard hours#yeonjun hard thoughts#yeonjun hard hours#yeonjun smut#yeonjun#yeonjun fic#txt fic#Yeonjun smut#yeonjun x reader#yeonjun x you#lexi's world đ§!!
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Iâm obsessed with the Spencer and mean girl!reader!, i was wondering if you could expand a bit more and show the time she does bite back at the team for being rude or teasing Spencer?
plus size mean girl!reader, wc: 565.
a/n: decided to reopen my asks because the ones that you guys are sending are just too good! this fic was lowkey healing because i HATE when the team cuts spencer off.
Being able to go out all together was an incredible feat.
Most of the time everyoneâs schedules didnât align, but in this instance, you were able to catch a moment of peace.
The bar was bustling, live with people as music boomed from the speakers placed miscellaneously throughout the building.
Youâre cuddled close into Spencerâs side, practically sitting on his lap as your sides touch. Spencer had thrown his coat over your lap because, admittedly, the bar was kind of cold, and your skirt was way too short to handle the chill.
You should be dancing, but youâre rather buzzed, the need inside you quelled by his slack covered leg that provided you with much needed warmth. You nursed the fruity cocktail in your hand, the sweetness a pleasant taste.Â
âUgh,â Voiced JJ. âIf I drink anymore, I think Iâll spontaneously combust.â Her sentence ended with a groan. Emily patted her shoulder sympathetically, though that didnât stop her from taking another sip of her whiskey.
âDid you know that itâs scientifically proven that you canât actually spontaneously combust due to an excessive amount of alcohol intake. Itâs a myth thatâs long been -â
âSpence,â JJ interrupted. âI know. I was just being sarcastic.â
âOh. Sorry.â
Spencerâs face bloomed a normally endearing red, but this time you can tell that being cut off flustered him. Your hand that was clasped loosely in his tightened, and his body grew rigid as he felt your long acrylic nails dig into his skin.
âThat was rude.â You said bluntly. That broke JJ and Emily out of their conversation.
The drunken smile on her face slowly fell at the sight of your serious demeanor. âIâm sorry?â She asked, giggling awkwardly.
âHe was talking and you cut him off. It was rude.â You said simply. Spencer softly called your name from your side, âItâs fine.â He had said.Â
âNo, itâs not fine. Even if you already knew, you shouldnât have been an ass and cut him off.â Her mouth fell open, stunted. âIâŚâ Emily, bless her heart, was as shocked as her.
âItâs fine.â Spencer made sure to put the emphasis on âfine.âÂ
You threw a look to him from the side before pouting your pink gloss covered lips, crossing your arms. âIâm just saying.â You said dismissively, as if you hadnât just caused a scene.
âUh -â
âMore drinks, yeah?â Emily interrupted with fake cheerfulness. âJJ?â
âYeah, yeahâŚâ She got up and left with her with an uneasy grin on her face, leaving both you and your boyfriend at the table alone.
âWhy would you do that?â Spencer asks with a deep, exasperated sigh. âBecause theyâve been working with you for years, and yet they still find it okay to cut you off.â
âYeah, but⌠If I was bothered by her cutting me off, I would have said something.â
âThatâs the funny thing about it, Spence. You still find it hard to stick up for yourself, especially to people you respect. You shouldnât just have to sit there and take it. Youâre not a dog.â
Youâre fully looking at him now, and heâs just⌠gazing at you. âWhat? Is there gloss on my teeth?â You run your tongue over them. âNo,â He chuckles breathily with a shake of his head. âI just⌠thank you.âÂ
Itâs your turn to fluster at the sheer admiration in his voice.Â
âI - you already know itâs nothing.â
#â â signed meau !#spencer x reader#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x plus size reader#plus size reader#x plus size reader#x chubby reader#plus size!reader#chubby reader#fluff#fanfiction#spencer fanfiction#spencer reid fanfiction#criminal minds fanfiction
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It will never not be funny how Alhaitham said he's needed in the house of Daena and Hoyo had the time to animate Tighnari being like "...Huh?" Like, what was that for?? Was Tighnari just as confused as we are that this guy is coincidentally hanging around in Port Ormos, so that Kaveh can coincidentally run into him?? They didn't even address it in the end, which makes it even funnier.
HELPPP!! Anon Iâm going crazy, alhaitham really said he was there for work, but he made time to head to a secluded area for a private talk with kaveh, and after their conversation was crashed, he helped with the plot, and suddenly had to leave?
What did his office based job require him to do in port ormos? How long does it take in game to get from port ormos, and back to the house of daena? the genshin map is notoriously nonsensical, but port ormos and sumeru city are almost on opposite sides of the map, why did he make it sound like it was a brisk stroll away?
Someone commented that alhaitham saying âsee you laterâ was in reference to kaveh, since kaveh was the only person in frame, and alhaithamâs signature âsee youâ is directed to the traveller, when itâs uncertain when theyâll next meet. this just makes me ill â alhaitham and kaveh LIVE together, and still they ensured that they would be able to have a private conversation when unexpectedly (serendipitously) meeting
And !!! so real about tighnariâs reaction. When reading the leaks and then seeing the actual cutscene I perceived it to be both about his curiosity about why everyone was gathered (to discuss the wedjat eye), but also about alhaithamâs sudden departure AND presence, considering that alhaitham had nothing to do with the celebrations.
The blocking here is so ?? itâs not clear whether tighnari is reacting to his confusion with what kaveh means by âmysteriesâ, since this exchange could have happened before alhaitham left, but the fact it happens after creates this ambiguity, so tighnari potentially questioning why alhaitham is in port ormos when thereâs no clear reason why he should be is so funny to me
weâre told that everyone is gathered in port ormos in order for the birthday celebrations to remain a secret, but alhaitham needed to be there to progress plot, but also to be with kaveh â it was apparently essential the devs engineer a way to drop in that kaveh programmed mehrak to recognise alhaithamâs voice...? Itâs hilarious and sick! <///3
#haikaveh#kavetham#alhaitham#kaveh#genshin impact#they come as a pair DO NOT separate#tighnari saying 'you're ALL here' meanwhile alhaitham has no idea what's happening in the parade. the reason why everyone else is there#tighnari saying 'those two are too much' in an odd textual mystery implies that he should be used to them stuck at the hip by now helppppp#thank you for this fun ask anon i also had the same reaction!! i'd like to thank hoyo for their fun ambiguity#the same could be said about kaveh talking about his and mehrak's relationship which parallels with his and alhaitham's relationship#at the start of this very scene just a very nice ambiguity <3#also i will be hopping on and off during this month and the next so i will definitely get around to everyone's lovely asks!!!
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Its extremely funny and mildly irritating seeing so many people get disgruntled about emmrich's approximate age vs. his appearance, because nobody can seem to agree if he looks younger than he should, if he looks his age, or if he looks older than he should
It mainly highlights something I was discussing with my sister the other night, which is that a lot of people don't have an especially good idea of what people tend to look like at different stages of life or ages. Part of this is definitely because of modern beauty standards, as well as social factors, expectations, and trends that differ from place to place
That being said, genuinely I think a lot of people just seem to forget that there is a LOT of variation when it comes to how fast or how well someone ages, and it can be influenced by your genetics, environment, stress, and countless other factors. You can't always tell how old someone is just based on their appearance, attitude, or how they act. Sometime it's possible to get a good idea or guess, but there's always going to be people who age very well and look much younger than they are, and also people who age poorly and look much older than they are
Whether or not you believe the bioware devs and ms. Sylvia with regards to emmrich's age, I think you have to keep in mind the fact that he works and essentially lives in an underground city-sized crypt and probably doesn't get a lot of sunlight. He's fastidious and extremely particular about his appearance, and probably his health, too, given his thanatophobia. And he's a busy guy! He's a researcher, a scholar, a teacher, and has his own fair share of responsibilities around the necropolis. I think these are all extremely relevant factors that some people don't seem to be taking into consideration when it comes to discussing if he "looks his age" or not
And about him being overdramatic about his age and acting like he's on death's door... I think some people are genuinely overstating the case based on a few interactions in game. But I also do think that him being a diva about his age is entirely in character, because his entire thing is that he has a severe fear of dying. It doesn't matter if he gripes about his age constantly (which he doesn't) or if he only brings it up on occasion (which he does), because the entire point is that he's terrified of dying, and people notoriously DIE when they get older
Does emmrich look his age? Do the people at bioware not know what people in his supposed age bracket look like? Do the people claiming he doesn't look his age know what people in his supposed age bracket look like? Does it really matter if he "looks too young" or if he "looks too old"?
Can you really not imagine a scenario where someone like him could theoretically look and act the way he does at his age?
#text post tag#dragon age#da:v#emmrich volkarin#this started out as a simple post but it got away from me a bit#i just?????#is the idea that he could be in his 50's or 60's and look or act the way he does#really so fucking foreign to some poeple?#regardless of if they think any part of it is too low or too high?
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hiiiđ I kinda have a few questions about curlyâs mom Ngl and maybe his dad. I think my first question for his mom though isâŚ.is she racist or just a toxic boy mom or both. I also kinda wonder like what makes her like jimmy so much. Then about his dad. Ik we donât really know much about him but I just wanted to know like does he likes us at all or more than the mom. I also kinda want to understand curly and his momâs dynamic. Like when it comes to the toxic boy mom is she trying to see the husband she wants in curly. Because it kinda just came to point where is like these weird boy moms are kinda grooming or being weird with their son. Or is it more of just sheâs jealous like jimmy but they arenât jealous in the same way. I guys my class question is just why did curlyâs mom and dad and how did curly take it. Also sorry if this is a lotđ happy holidays đ
authorâs note hi! thank you for your ask. this is a long post and i donât want to clog up the feed. so click âkeep readingâ to keep reading lol.
content good luck captain
ok so, hereâs the long answer to your first question đ as youâve probably noticed i am a black writer and make it my purpose to write for readers who look like me. the mouthwashing fandom is still so new and i havenât really seen any black reader stories for curly (or really anyone) except for @grimmsbride who iâve seen writing for curly and daisuke (check them out!).
because i still want an audience to cater to (and i donât know what demographic iâm actually pulling from my fics), i would say yes and yes to your question about curlyâs mom in good luck, captain. i could definitely see her being prejudice to reader if theyâre poc and is most definitely a toxic boy mom. whatever the case is for you, sheâll never really see you as the best fit for her son.
as for jimmy, iâve mentioned he grew up with curly in happy birthday, jolene. she just sees him as another son just based on shared history and proximity. heâs family.
i havenât thought much about curlyâs dad and just now realized i probably should have included him and his reaction to the tuplar crash in best wishes, curly. i feel that curly really favors his father and i hinted in dream of fish that his mom doesnât really like that. as itâs been previously mentioned, he lives in australia and had most of the custody over curly. i imagine him as a really chill dude whoâs really really funny and charming and likes to explore. heâd probably get remarried to someone who shares his humor and sense of adventure. when reader and curly are dating, sheâs only spoken to mr. curly a few times over facetime or skype. but he likes you and accepts you as his son loves you tons. he let curly propose to you in his home.
i would say that during the events of best wishes, curly, he didnât come visit you in person as it was hard for him to handle the loss of his son but he did call from time to time. even when curly came back, it was still tough for him to see his son but he still maintains a relationship with him.
curly respects his mom but there is a limit to their relationship. he did go to school in australia and came to stay with her on breaks - he didnât get to see her all the time and as he grew, he tries to maintain a healthy and balanced relationship with her. he got closer to her when he decided to go to college in the united states and she really takes advantage of their proximity. i wouldnât say sheâs grooming him. she left a marriage that she felt wasnât perfect and would lonve to be involved in curlyâs decisions when it comes to who heâs in love with. sometimes sheâll suggest the daughters of her friends from work or church bc she thinks theyâll fit in her idea of what curlyâs family and future should look like.
over time, i feel that she would be jealous of reader bc she got the family that mrs. former curly wanted.
mr. curly and mrs. former curly just fell out of their rhythm. they were high school sweethearts and had the perfect white picket fence life and it just didnât work out one day. after countless arguments, curlyâs dad decided to file for divorce and mrs. former curly signed them in a heartbeat. obvs curly was confused and heart broken as his parents did a good job hiding their issues and he couldnât fathom why they would separate. having to go back and forth between continents was stressful at first but it became a routine for him.
and no worries about the length of your ask. i appreciate your interest in good luck, captain! happy holidays to you too!
#captain curly#curly mouthwashing#captain curly x reader#curly x reader#mouthwashing x reader#curly x reader mouthwashing#black yn#black reader
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blehhh sillae
#elden ring#thiollier#elden ring thiollier#the entire dlc I was waiting for this man to die because I wanted his armor#and when he did finally die I didn't like it#he is just a funny guy he should have lived#anyways this 'im weary of life' interaction lives rent-free in my head#and my stinky ass tarnished I guess#he must have a whole ecosystem in his hair the way I keep making him roll#that and ive never seen this man bathe
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happy halloween! đđââŹđťđ
#i just wanted to draw emu as a jiangshi .#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#emu otori#proseka#tsukasa tenma#nene kusanagi#rui kamishiro#wxs#wonderlands x showtime#polysho#enjoy halloween everynyan unfortunately i have to go work a shift. i thought abt dressing up for fun when i get back#but 1 im lazy 2 i dont live alone and its my luck that somebody ends up knocking when im in the middle of being dressed like a clown#so i would rather not risk it. idk how people get into cosplay just for photoshoots/videos i dont have that conviction .#but halloween con was lots of fun and i got to see friends and trade candy so i enjoyed my celebration already. ^_^#also STOP BEATING THE SHITNOUT OF ME IDEK IF I CAN BOOO BACK FROM A SIDE BLOG. YOURE KILLUNG ME#once again some random guy will be hittimg you back. boo#to end my tags i am going to be pissed off because i cannot draw well rn and its KILLING MEEEEEE#im art blocked as hell and mad about it. my zines....#its so annoying like with my personal art its whatever but people spend Money on zines i need to get good.#its been like over a week so i thought inwould be free. sigh#i often draw emu fiending off of tsukasa. the way things should be. amen#also inthink rui would love to go all out for costumes but he got busy modding a tshirt launcher to shoot candy and forgot abt his costume#so hes a tuxedo cat. he thinks hes so funny
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more ready player one cherik au ideas
erik is pretty much a complete loser irl and online and barely has any friends until he meets charles at the first trial and joins his online friendgroup (aka fc xmen) when he gets the first key
everyones avatars are more based on their comic looks so they all look a bit silly but its the oasis so its okay
thats pretty much it so far my brain is slowly building some kind of a story but it hasnât gone into details yet
i dont even know if im gonna write this i just gotta dump my ideas here otherwise theyâll be sent to the void
#people who write fanfics are crazy (in a good way)#dont know how you guys manage to do this#thisll probably be more based of the movie than the book as i have no patience to reread it all just to get ideas#honestly if the oasis was real i would gladly just experience any movie this halliday guy has seen#thatd be cool#if it wasnât all just based in 80s-90s stuff i would gladly live through xmen films#be charles xavier or something#altough iâd having magneto just hovering over my shoulder the whole time so i might leave those gays be#imma just be one of those oc inserts or something#iâve definitely noticed my spelling and grammar is terrible#anyway erik falling in love with bald charles and then falling in love with charles with hair#raven should put charles avatar as bald as a prank but then he keeps it cause he finds it funny#trying to think if they should have mutations irl or not#cause idk how well superpowers would work in an online multiplayer game#especially telepathy#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#x men#magneto#professor x#ready player one au#cherik au
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so let me get this straight, watcher:
An unknown party is planting VHS tapes on your own set weekly, containing ad reads by:
a self-proclaimed professor
who mentions unfortunate encounters with horses
who has an 'estranged wife'
whose jacket is tan and tie and red
who is a 'gamer'
whose image flickered in like a hologram in an earlier ad read,
and you want us to just like, not think Something Smells Fishy. OK...
#mod post#mystery files#puppet history#watcher entertainment#shane madej#my actual theories? it's very possible these are being made and planted by the substitute and that's what i'd put my money on. however#at times it seems like he's sort of uncertain what to say next or like he's coming up with things on the spot? so i think it would be funny#if these were being made and sent by the puppets in purgatory; we know they make their own ads for their own shows and they were able#to send A Hologram to the Realm Of The Living so maybe a VHS isn't out of the question. this then makes me think that someone in there has#accidentally made up a character who's Just The Professor Himself Kinda. sorry guys not everyone is cut out for the writer's room !!#honestly though that seems like a happy end for them. i think they should be allowed to make watcher ad reads and their silly TV shows#instead of necessarily Having to go to the afterlife!#my third theory is this is just watcher having fun and doing it purposely. it fits that the corkboard show would have us doing the same
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It's missing my father hours rn so imma just dump a bunch of pictures here and cry
( sorry i don't know the source of anything I just had them on my phone)
(also dont read the tags i just need to let it out lol)
#I just realized I can call him dad easier than my real dad and now I understand why am I so damn attached to him#I always knew he was a parental figure for me#but now I connected the dots#How when u have an absent dad and a d34d mom a guy shows up in ur life#that tells u life advice that both of ur parents failed to do so#and makes u feel safe the first time in ur life#ofc ud become attached#i know for sure its unhealthy how much i love and miss him#he occupies most of my thoughts honestly#But how could i not cling to him so much when he was the only one who gave me hope in life#i try to keep going and even tho he is not here i keep telling myself whatever he taught me. i keep reminding myself he wants us to live an#bloom and be free#and that's what ill try to do#but you know somedays i wish i could just disappear and be wrapped in eternal happiness#its so fucking hard to pull yourself out of the slump man im so fucking tired im so so tired#somedays i wish id have the courage to off myself but i know that deep down i want to live and ive always wanted to live but i have no idea#how to live. i feel like i finally found a purpose and someone i love. but at the same time im always doubting myself and im scared of losi#g this little hope again and i know i should cherish and use it instead but each day i have this anxiety because rn i have nothing else if#lose this i seriously will lose everything atp. but ill still try bc rn its this or death so i should try im just damn tired yes anyways#sorry for being depressing some days just dont work out but thats okay#yes at the same time i want to get out of my head and try to find some friends but i cant deny that im highkey fucked up and i just cant le#go of my past and i still feel like that helpless unloved kid and idk how to form relationships this way. i dont trust myself at all so idk#how to trust others. and i feel like in order to find ppl that would love me i have to overshare abt my whole lifestory bc it still dictate#my life heavily. and since i met this band its better cuz im learning to deal w it and i want to heal from everything but yes at the same t#me who would wqnt to be friends w. someone that has like a year of life experience and 18 years of depression lol#so yes its complicated. bc i have friends but im like the funny friend. the one that is as shallow as puddle and has no problems but honest#y im genuinely sufferint qnd have been sufferinz all my life so i want to come out of my funny friend role. but that wojld mean i have to t#ll the shit i went through to all my friends but tbh it would be so random so ye. i do have a plan though. how it could work. But yes im ti#ed have been tired for 7 years now. But this time around i hope i can successfully get out of this torture cycle lol.#ok sorry this is what happens after puberty guys i could beva research case for a damn mental institute atp xdd
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Demyx (my beloved)
#kingdom hearts#demyx#honestly is there an organization member i dont like? not really tbh#ok i lied maybe one but even then i find him fascinating so even he gets a pass#demyx being such a good boy who doesnt actually care for fighting then having the whole kh3 thing#where he has the yellow eyes but still just helps the good team vaguely then dips out of the entire game#where did he go and why .... what secrets do you hold young man#i should replay kh3 cause there are things i think i remember but idk for sure#like wasnt there actually a scene where hes just... been benched for being bad at being bad or smth#i really remember a scene where either he says or someone else is like oh yeah he got benched lol#like why does he have to be so funny yet get so little screen time im dying squirtle#though for the record him just handing a mannequin to even and saying peace out for the rest of the game WAS hilarious#this is me living the best time line where not only does demyx just dip and never get mentioned from anyone#but also in an otome i played theres a route where my fave guy just also dips early on#and then in the very end some other LI asks another LI what happened to him btw like where did he go#and the another LI was like oh my god i forgot about him idk man#my favorites just making an appearance and leaving is really funny to me#these tags got super long bc im very stressed and now devoting brain power to vgs in order to not cry
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My dad rewatching the FNaF movie with me: So that guy's the killer right?
Me: Yes! I'm kind of disappointed he's no longer British
My dad: He's no longer What
#I just thought matthew lillard doing a British accent would be funny#Loved the practical effects and everything#soundtrack was s tier#there's a slow middle section of the movie#but it was good!#I justified that phone guy was absent because the logical thing to do when you hear#'the bite of 87'#and 'its amazing the human body can live without the frontal lobe'#is to put in your 3 weeks notice and get out of there#despite what some people say I thought the dream sequences were a pretty neat way to extend the amount of time mike spends at the pizzeria!#because again when you find out the animatronics move by themselves its time to gtfo#i do think when vanessa threatened him with the rooty tooty mcshooty he should have probably quit#but you know can't have everything#these tags are getting long lets wrap this up#fnaf spoilers#fnaf tag#fnaf movie#five nights at freddy's#fnaf#ramblings of a stranger#special interest tag
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the boy-but-not-that-way-ism of riz gukgak send tweet
#not art#have been chipping away at a more... proper? so to say. piece of the kids for keepsake. and since its of them at the beach Im rotating#gender stuff in brain again. riz and gorgug ping a lot of the like funny gender stuff in my brain#very specifically adjacent to cultural understanding of it all... like I did say I do think riz has a gender and it can be#translated to ''man'' in solesian understanding but also that boy has close to no self awareness nor does he want to#he grew up as ''goblin'' before ''boy'' and it's kinda how he perceives himself. got a gender but doesn't wanna do much with it#kinda imagining him seeing his grandparents again and realizing that there's a gap there between himself and his grandpa too#and sitting with that for a bit. not for long that kid doesnt do that but for just a little bit#man I truly really do love that riz is aroace. my boy of the unquantifiable unimportant margins....#gorgug though is 100% trans lmao. there's a kinda distance to his own body in how he acts#that's kinda common in ''mad scientist'' characters? (or maybe my perspective's just skewed due to willow jenkins lmao)#kid spent the first two seasons fitting himself in places he Should be able to fit. and s3 is pretty much all about him Making New Spaces#thing is despite looking ardently for like. the reason Why he can't fit in in the first season I think gorgug really does#love his gnome parents and love being their child. and its confusing and tough to have to learn why something you love still hurts you#he wants it to not. he wants to make sense. and then it does and it changes nothing really#until he actively makes choices based on what he's learned. like. damn idk how to word it but#just like the ability to say ''actually this Is my life what are u gonna do? stop me from living it?'' is a powerful force#its rly fun to look at these two guys in these contexts thats like#they will never win the gender game just by virtue of being who they are. it's not designed for folks like them to win#but riz would simply not play and gorgug would design his Own game he's the champion of. and I think that rules
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LAAt Pilot Howler and former Construct Detritus, who would really prefer if he would stop getting them shot out of the skies
"As if it is my fault we have to fly directly into artillery fire!" Howler would reply Wooo I love this peace and these two who managed to find their way to eachother in a universe that has predestined them to die in the name of others since the dawn of their creation. They refuse to be the shadows of others they were always meant to be, and will instead forge their own path forwards as individuals, as people, with their own hopes and dreams and ambitions. And they're going to do it together.
#star wars#star wars clone wars#swtcw#sw ocs#star wars oc#star wars ocs#clone pilot oc#clone trooper oc#just some guy oc#howler tag#detritus tag#no detritus is not nihlus#either would literally murder you for saying that#but Nihlus *is* responsible for Detritus' creation#Detritus is his failed placeholder to nihlus and to Detritus Nihlus is his horrible creator who made him to do nothing but suffer#which... is actually true. Nihlus created him to suffer in Nihlus place as his construct#what a construct *is* is actually a bit more complicated#no he's not a clone of Nihlus he just used to live in the same head and existed to take his place during torture#as if it's Nihlus' fault he became too self-aware and actually developed a will to live where none should have existed#and howlers just a funny guy
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spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner
#vulnerable tag rambles ahead please be kind abt them i didnt intent to ramble this much but i dont wanna delete it eitehr#me to every single man i have ever dated after 6mo-1y: yeah hey this really isnt working out i dont really know why but i really hate mysel#and i dont want to blame you because i dont think you did anything inherently wrong here; i think this is something about me but i need#space to figure out why im feeling this way [every single one reacted by telling me No i wasnt allowed to leave btw]#i hold very complex feelings about these relationships esp bc of them ending in very violent/chaotic ways most of the time#but its interesting to look back at it all and realize ive left every man for the same reason (which is that ive hated myself Every Single#Time ive dated a man) and its funny bc i recognized the self hate pretty early on w/ cishet men but when it came to queer men it was#much more confusing (esp w/ nto knowing Any lesbians at that point in my life). im so happy im a lesbian tbh#i have a lot of issues w/ the racism fatphobia and transmisogyny present in lesbian groups#and also coming out as a lesbian really truly saved my life. before i met my wife i was quite literally in a 3yr abusive relationship that#definitely would have died in if i hadnt realzied i was a lesbian and ran from him#its also weird seeing liek the hard evidence of the things that happened to me btween 2016-2020 tbh#cause that was such a bad time of my life. i truly dont know how i survived it but im so glad i did#like the three major relationships in my life b4 meeting my wife was: guy who was in college when i was in HS who stalked me when i left;#guy who was a year younger than me who cheated on me the entire time while telling me he was being victimized (he wasnt; this was very mess#guy who saw the very messy toxic ldr i was in and helped me dump my ex then decided that meant we were in a relationship [insert 3 yrs here#and admittedly all 3 years with him werent the same level of abusive but it was definitely unhealthy from the start considering I Didnt Kno#we were together until he wanted to celebrate vday and got mad i didnt know our anniversary - and like this isnt including the other stuff#that happened between those Relatonships[tm] (cause ive never been monogamous; these were just the Major Relationships)#like i genuinely think if i hadnt come out i'd be dead rn given just how dangerous my relationships were/continued getting#i am also so tired now that ive seen all this cause like. fuck i can barely believe it and i not only lived it but have PTSD about it#i should write about my life sometime. i feel like it'd be cathartic to try and make a tangible timeline and stories from the years ang stu#anyway yeah. be nice about the tag rambles. dont message me with pity or curiosity or anything about this. i dont usually talk abt this stu#publicly bc i hate the ways ppl start tryign to baby me when they realize my life has been extremely fucked up until only a few years ago#n im still working on accepting kindness from others bc of [insert life traumas here] but its a long process so pls respect my need for jus#being heard rn w/o too much pressure< 3 (but ig if u do read this can u like it cause i feel a little crazy seeing all the evidence of the#stuff i experienced now also cause fuck ik logically it was but also i cant believe it was all real still yk)
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Sketch I accidentally put too close between other doodles
#i gotta get better at figuring out where battle scars would go... esp bc i'm so detailed about moe all the time LMFAO#one thing about the moefonse dynamic. is i think each envies the other to a degree.#in my notes i once described alfonse's feelings about moe as seeing an angel.#a beacon of the beauty life has to offer and hope. the magic and awe of seeing someone who is overtly and unapologetically queer#the beauty of seeing someone just fagging it up. with attitude. outspoken and crude.#writing that note was extremely funny though like. moe? we're talking about the same guy?#my shitass fuckhead homunculus who has every disease? guy who failed in every facet of life EXCEPT for the Bad things?#bc that's all it is and all it ever will be? a bad fucking thing. that guy????#well. it's a matter of perspective... perhaps.....#another focal part is how each have made all-or-nothing sacrifices to live the way they live.#alfonse will never be his own person so long as he's a prince and eventually king. he will always be whatever he Needs to be.#but he's also someone who's wired in such a way that. this makes sense for him. this IS what he wants and embraces it#esp for the good of all. 'those w power should use it to protect those who don't' (ashnard interaction)#that's his mentality. that's what he believes in. that's what he's going to embody no matter the cost.#meanwhile... moe. well. you know about moe. it's a tale as old as time for queer people unfortunately.#endlessly complicated on moe's end as well. the way it both resents and envies what alfonse is able to do.#idk i can talk about it forever. but i gotta organize my tags here i CAN'T HIT LIMIT đđđ#moe tag#fe alfonse#moe lore#summoner oc#my art
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