#he is in a powder keg of stress at all times and because he knows nothing different he sees no escape

[zeebreezin]

Sometimes I forget that B. Beverley’s official reason for being in London is that he’s studying at Summerset College on the admiralty’s dime. Not only is he in his 20s, he’s also like a full time student during all the nonsense he goes through. Dude tried to blackmail his superior and was subsequently murdered, barely escaped being sent into the Zee with cement fluke baited shoes, and then… probably had to write a term paper due that week. No wonder he wants to blow shit up.

[runnning-outof-time]

Congratulations, I adore your story!!

Could you please do 23 with angst and then fluff? Thank you so much I appreciate it!💕

Thanks so much for sending this in, anon! I’m so happy you like my stories! I decided to go with Tommy for the character and chose “I don’t want to go.” for the prompt because it was the 5 word #23. I hope you don’t mind that. Enjoy! :)

I’D LOVE TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK! - YOUR COMMENTS & REBLOGS HELP ME WRITE!

Part of my 3.5k Celebration — find more stories here!

To Keep You Safe

Tommy Shelby x Reader

Warnings: season 4 spoilers (like right from the jump), language

Word Count: 1042

Summary: (Y/N) and Tommy discuss the decision to have her go into hiding while the war with the Changrettas rages on.

Things were heating up in the vendetta between the Shelbys and the Changrettas. What both sides thought would be a quick battle had now turned into a full-on war. And after Luca managed to get to Michael in his hospital bed and try to get him to switch sides, Tommy was convinced that no one was safe.

He called a family meeting. He arranged it in the morning and it was set for that evening. The air in the room was so thick with tension that you could practically cut it with a knife. (Y/N) noted that they were currently in the midst of a thunderstorm, which she had a feeling was foreshadowing for what was to be talked about.

And oh boy was she right. Things were quiet between her and Tommy that night. Neither of the two spoke a word to the other before they both went to sleep.

(Y/N) didn’t really sleep much though. No matter how many times she wished it wouldn’t, tomorrow still came.

Soon enough, there was a man in a car sitting outside their Watery Lane home.

“I don’t want to go,” (Y/N) huffed as she crossed her arms. She was aware of how much she sounded like their three year old daughter, but she quite frankly didn’t care.

“You have to, love,” Tommy insisted, not wanting this to turn into something bigger than it had to be.

“Why?” she asked, her one eyebrow quirking upward.

“Don’t fucking start…” he trailed off with a sigh.

“You owe me a reason, Thomas. I’m not just going to be shipped off into the fucking wilderness for no fucking reason,” she harped on, sharing her feelings about the decision that had been made — essentially without her consent — the night prior.

“You know why,” he told her, insisting it was common sense.

“Enlighten me anyway,” she shrugged.

“(Y/N).”

“Tommy.”

“It’s to keep you safe!” he finally came out with it, his voice raising as his eyes went wide, showing the frustration and stress he was currently under. “It’s to keep you fucking safe.”

(Y/N) was taken back by his outburst, but she really should have expected it. She was poking a bear; a powder keg that was bound to explode sooner or later. “You’re keeping me safe here, though. And besides, it was agreed between the both of you: no civilians. No women or children,” she pointed out in a softer voice, recalling the rules of the vendetta that he’d told her a few weeks prior.

“Yeah, I know that was agreed upon,” Tommy started, nodding as a sigh escaped his lips, “but with how things are going…we need to expect everything. And I can’t have you get taken by him or his men as a way to get me. So I need you to go. Just for a little while.”

Silence fell between them as she took a minute to think things over. The last thing she wanted to do was leave Tommy’s side while all of this was going on.

“I don’t want to leave you, Tommy,” was the next thing she said. She couldn’t get through the sentence without choking up, tears brimming up in her eyelids.

Tommy exhaled a breath before he closed the short distance between them, taking her into his arms just as her body began to shake from her sobs. “It’ll just be a little while, love,” he spoke in a soft voice, his chin rested on the top of her head as he rubbed her back in a comforting manner.

They stood like that for a few minutes. (Y/N) had no shame in crying into her husband’s suit coat. She didn’t want to let him go and leave because she was afraid that this would be the last time she’d see him.

“Hey, the car’s waiting outside,” Tommy was the one to speak first. He loosened his hold on her as he did, moving his hands to her shoulders so that he could bring her out at arms length.

“I know,” (Y/N) nodded, sniffling as she wiped her tears away. “I’ll miss you, Tommy,” she added then, looking at him with watery eyes.

“I’ll miss you too, love,” he responded without a second thought, raising one hand to run it down her cheek.

“Make sure you go visit the kids for me…or at least send Pol or someone if you think it’s too risky,” she added, thinking of her children who were currently residing at her parents’ home.

“I will,” he assured her with a nod.

(Y/N) took a moment to look at her husband then, making sure she could commit every part of him to memory. She didn’t know when she’d see him next. Her bottom lip began to quiver as that thought stuck in her mind.

“It’s just a little while,” Tommy repeated what he’d said to her before.

“I know,” she nodded, holding back the tears. “I love you.”

“I love you,” he repeated the phrase, leaning in and pressing his lips to hers. (Y/N) held him there, making their embrace as long as it could possibly be. But eventually she had to pull away, and as she did, she finally decided it was time. “I should go.”

“I’ll come get you when this is finished,” he promised her, their eyes locked as he spoke.

“Just stay alive,” she said to him, sending one last smile her way before they finally broke their embrace so that she could grab her things.

Tommy ushered her outside and made sure she got into the vehicle. He then gave the driver and his accomplice strict instructions on what to do. After sending one last smile to (Y/N), he let them go and headed back inside.

He took two steps away from the door and placed his hands onto the side table sitting there so that he could brace himself as he leaned back against it. He tipped his head back and closed his eyes for a moment, his family flashing in his mind. Then he released the breath he’d been holding and stared straight ahead. This vendetta would be finished soon, and he’d make damn sure of it.

**tags are in a reblog, so that hopefully the notification gets sent

MASTERLIST

[theworldibuilt4you]

[Addie flinched again at the yelling, releasing a miserable puff of a hiss from the stress.]

I... W-well yes, but...

[They were at a loss, now. All their effort felt like it was for nothing - that they had reached a limit to how much they could reach the broken kid before them. Tears brimmed in their eyes as a familiar helplessness settled in; a final straw in their emotional powder keg.]

God, do you think I wanted to? That I liked growing up in a world that hated me? That told me I was a mistake?? You should know very well what kind of thoughts you have, being treated like that.

[Their blood was running hot and cold at the same time. It was dizzying]

So many times I'd wish people would just finish the job. But they didn't. So many times I wished I would just bleed out on the ground where people left me. But I didn't. Sure, I got to grow up, but I certainly wasn't living.

It wasn't until I came here that I actually began to feel like I was maybe worth something. That I was even capable of being loved.

[They were laughing, now; it was funny, how bad they were at everything. They were bad at being born, at existing, at saving the only friends the universe accidentally allowed them to find.]

And you know, something tells me that even though you claim Kinito is your best friend, he was just a band-aid to cover a gaping wound. A distraction from the pain. You never really let him in because for whatever reason, you don't want to move on from your past.

[They thought about what was at stake - Casey was likely still in danger, along with Jade, too, for harboring them. Owl was definitely in danger, and at this point Sec and themselves were likely at some risk too, despite being outside. Kinito was probably the safest of them all, though if anything happened to Owl it'd no doubt kill him emotionally. And Sonny... They didn't even know if they'd ever see him again.]

You could stop the cycle of suffering, but you won't. You won't and I can't do anything about it and I'll just have to accept the fact that that these past few weeks have been a big cosmic fluke. That I was never meant to be happy.

...That people like us were never meant to be happy.

[Tears were streaming down their face now, their hands knotted in their hair as they sobbed uncontrollably.]

Even when we really, really want us to be...

-Addie

[....SYSTEM REBOOT INITIATED.] [RESTARTING FROZEN ASSETS]

[YOU WANT WHAT LITTLE I HAD?]

[TAKE IT.]

[I DON'T CARE ANYMORE.]

[weebsinstash]

On my platonic yandere Batfam bullshit again thinking about, like, deliberately dramatic scenarios because I crave emotional tension

-imagine if Bruce gets called in to regressed!Reader's school because you got in a fist fight with another kid, and this kid is the son of one of his prominent business partners and Bruce, uh, doesn't immediately believe you when you state for him and the principal why you got into a fight because, hey he knows that boy, he isn't THAT bad! And Bruce scolds you and makes you apologize and even grounds you once you two are in the car alone and you're just noticeably extremely angry and quiet to the point you won't even come out of your room for dinner. And after some time has passed, days even, a couple members of the fam are in a room together with you and someone cracks a joke about you losing your temper over a misunderstanding and you just, stare directly at them as you pull out your phone, press play on a video, and walk away as they watch where you had been trying to take a photo of something like idk a flower or the weather and began accidentally filming after Selina helped dropped you off at school and the footage caught the boy outright calling her a slut for what she was wearing

And of course Bruce is upset because that kid insulted Catwoman and also got some swings back at you (he's probably proud to a certain degree that you defended Selina and shes absolutely delighted when she hears about it) but he asks "well why didn't you tell me you had proof im the first place" and you just spit at him "oh so I need PROOF for you to BELIEVE ME?" And extra bonus points if Reader has their old memories back and hits him with "after everything you've done to me, I finally ask for your help and ACTUALLY needed you this ONE TIME and you couldn't even believe me? Wow, my hero 🙄" so now he knows he's broken your heart AND you're back to the "old you" that he wants to, father all the depression and trauma out of

-since Dick, Barbara, and Reader would all be going to a prestigious school I think of like, what if your class got kidnapped for ransom while on a field trip. And Robin and Batgirl look over to you thinking you're going to panic and freak out but you're suspiciously calm, or, calmer than the anxiety stricken adopted 'sibling' they've had this whole time, and maybe despite being kidnapped by like, idk, Babyface or Black Mask or Two Face, and maybe you even just outright insult them and it becomes horribly obvious to them "oh not only do you have your memories back, they've unintentionally turned you into an explosive powder keg of repressed anger and frustration because they betrayed what little trust you had left"

You just look at Two Face and start fucking with him, this criminal looking down as a teenager starts roasting him way too casually and maybe with facts you shouldn't even know, things you remember from your time as a hero before. "Hey Harvey, what's hanging, it's been a while. Hey can I ask a question? You ever think about just outright asking someone like I dunno Bruce Wayne to fix that fucked up meat gristle face of yours? Like, I'm sure having half your body resemble the same consistency of a breakfast sausage has its uses in intimidation, but, like, I'm sure if you just walked up to Batman and said 'hey if you make me look less like a rotisserie chicken I'll quit crime' and he would probably just like, HAND the money for the sugery to you, like, do you think Batmobile money falls out of the sky, he's clearly fucking loaded"

And of course the follow up/alternative of "the stress triggers Reader's metagene or old memories or both and you just start whooping ass unapologetically and Barb and Dick are sweating because they're trying not to break incognito but like you're significantly hurting these dudes, you're clearly really angry and upset and taking it out on them" and tbh I imagine Batman already has contingencies for this possibility. He shows up in costume and Two Face has already fled but you're standing there in your preppy school uniform now dirty and torn, blood on your knuckles, about to beat a man unconscious while your classmates either cower or cheer or fear you. If Reader has some sort of magic, then he just has to get Nth metal from Hawkgirl or Hawkman, maybe he'll make it a cute bracelet, just a nice gift from Dad. Bodily autonomy to use your own powers and be an adult again, what's that? He's disappointed in you for caving into the darkness and also? you're grounded >:(

-Reader becoming a mugging/gun violence victim and now you're never allowed to leave the manor, period. I can only imagine like the projection of trauma from Bruce if, after losing his parents, he has to watch you weak and recovering from a gunshot, wheezing in bed struggling to breathe properly because a bullet went through one of your lungs. You're put in a total bubble to recover in absolute peace and sterility, but, even far after you've recovered, your "guardian" is still convinced someone will leap out of the bushes to hurt you, so, no leaving the manor unless he's with you. Like. Imagine him being so scared he doesn't even want to trust your safety with the other Batfamily members, and maybe he even cracks down on several of the other younger members because he doesn't want them to get shot too (also like, resulting trauma and overprotectiveness if one or multiple of them saw you get shot and are like, still fucked up over having to apply pressure to your bullet wound as your warm blood leaks all over their fingers and they can't do anything to stop you and-- like do you see how that would send some of them into borderline psychosis when theyve already got So Many Many Issues)

-all of them try to exert control over what you're exposed to and consume in terms of entertainment. You have spyware on your phone and any member of the Batfam who can use the Batcomputer can see your past and current browsing history and I will die on this hill. Bruce and Alfred are rigorous in making sure you don't ruin your mental health. Like you know how I talked about "what if you had a yandere that was in tech and he gave you a phone that he occasionally spies on and remotely disables if he thinks you're spending too much time on it/seeing something you shouldnt"? Bruh that's like half of the Manor, Bruce especially. He has to "make sure nothing bad happens to you". All it can take is 'one bad day', after all...

-obsessed with the idea of them getting jealous of you spending time with other alternate universe versions of themselves, in concepts where Reader is a JL member/vigilante and has the power/tech to multiverse travel anyways. Batman hasn't seen you in a couple weeks and, actually maybe he's a little concerned about you, you've kind of just vanished off the face of the earth, and he bumps into you on a Gotham rooftop with. Another Batman, and getting along much better and being more casual and friendly with the stranger than with him. Broody fucking "I am darkness, I am the night, I am vengeance" Bruce catching you like. smoking weed on his couch with the hilariously weird version of him from the Harley Quinn cartoon universe and God forbid if anyone shows signs of having feelings for you

(also could you imagine how ballistic he and or Jason would go if they caught you hanging out with, you know, one of the super violent "murder is ok" Jasons/Batmans and you tell them straight up "actually I agree with what he's doing, I want to help him, in fact maybe I'll work with HIM now instead of you" like, y'all, I think Batman would permanently never let you work as a hero or sidekick ever again because he's genuinely worried you'll fall down the slippery slope and make a mistake that ruins your life. Like depending on the depiction of Batman you're looking at, some of them admit straight up that they don't kill Joker because they know they're legitimately filled with so much anger and hatred that if they kill even one person, that'll break the barrier to killing tons of criminals outright and they won't be able to stop)

-all I'm saying is that if they ever caught you like being cordial or mildly friendly with an alternate universe version of a villain, no matter how good they are, they shut that shit down immediately. "Y/N who is that" "oh this is my bud The Jester from the universe where the Joker is actually really good and a superhero and--" *jester proceeds to be grappled back through a multiverse portal* "wait no don't freak out this poison ivy is actually really chill and she's married to Harley and she sells me really good weed and she only does a liiiiiitle bit of ecoterrorism and--" immediately thrown in Arkham

-I just genuinely think it's funny that they're probably either smoking weed with you bc trauma and stress or are vehemently anti drug. Can you imagine just in general like, regressed reader, batfam member, either way, just being an actual adult just minding your business and smoking weed and Bruce reacting like he just caught you with a loaded gun in your pocket "y/n is that a weed" "yeah its for my chronic pain--" "I'm calling commissioner gordon" like, Bruce practically acting like you need to go to rehab

-I kinda love the drama of Bruce or Dick or Barbara or just any of the Batfam members accidentally basically ruining your social life and social reputation. You were at a house party one night and eventually pics start getting texted around of Nightwing confronting you in the yard and pulling you away and now there are rumors you're a criminal on parole. You get invited to smoke weed at a friend's and suddenly Batman is in the house and suddenly everyone's parents are there to pick up their kids as he lectures about the dangers of drugs and now absolutely NO ONE from school wants anything to do with you "because what if Batman shows up and gets us in trouble"

-I feel like, as one of those vaguely morally gray areas, that Bruce would make you take medication and get treatment for, like, really anything that needs it, but more specifically anxiety and depression and just overall psychological issues. And as a dark twist what if you aren't really naturally anxious and don't even have an anxiety disorder or anything but he puts you on pills to mellow you out because you're freaking out at him for completely valid and understandable reasons like, you know, being confined in his home against your will. "What, you aren't mad about being kidnapped and controlled and lied to, you clearly just have pre existing emotional issues that keep you from reacting properly, but don't worry I'm here to help" 🙄🙄🙄

[redbudweiser]

Swan song & Honeydew

|| Carmen and Lip didn't know each other, but soon they bond through matching wounds. ||

Warnings: Doomed relationship grief, mourning, broken and sad shit in general, go read on my ao3.

•

Chapter 1.

It was a cold day in Chicago. It had been a week since Carmen hadn't even touched on the subject of his breakup.

Obviously.

Syd and Richie were a little worried and mostly tired. It's not like Carmen knew how to deal in the best way with things that weren't under his control. He was more stressed, but somehow he always came back from this dark place in his head and went back to the great feat that is his great restaurant. And with ''somehow he always came back'', a big culprit, like 95% of this blame or even more for sure is from Sydney, who could not share or lose the attention of his boss, again. Not now.

Richie never tired of throwing judgmental looks at the boss, and of being completely fed up when he tried to touch on the subject Claire, Carmen played deaf and mute.

He was doing a thousand things at the same time, and when he was alone, he thought. And he couldn't stop thinking, not even for a second. Thinking a lot is very useful in the kitchen, and Carmen's nature, but over time, after so many things, after the boss was forced to face himself, face everything he had no control over, he not only thought too much, he thought about everything, everyone, every hour the day and night without a break, it was torturous, and inevitable.

Meanwhile in the other part of Chicago,

Philip Gallagher. Sober, dealing with fights with his wife about whether or not it was time to have a child. They were fighting a lot and things were getting too dangerous. Tami wanted to leave that place, leave the south side, continue this part of her life somewhere where she could be freer, where they both had more opportunities. She wanted more. But Lip not. He was discovering things about himself, he had a community in that part of the city, finally after a long time of everyone telling him that he should get out of there, that he did not belong to that part of the city, and after all, he is rethinking again, if he really belongs to this city. Maybe he should really leave for good... But it was the first time after many years that he felt peace, that he was in a crescent where he only improved with himself.

The only thing that arrested him in that place was himself.

[X]

Carmy is smoking outside the restaurant, Richie arrives a few seconds after him.

– You look like a powder keg. You can't keep exploding with everyone because your ex doesn't talk to you, and because you're too much of a pussy to talk to her. - Richie leans against the wall to light his cigarette, while carmy take a drag of his.

– Richie, I swear to God–

– I'm not exaggerating and you know. Poor Sydney has to hold the ends alone in that kitchen while you're whining around. - Carmy couldn't afford to look exhausted, but he could afford to freak out all the time, at least around the chaos he worked the way he should, in his own opinion. So he just transparently being pissed off, while he listened to Richie speak without even looking him in the eye. And Richie, as much as he knew when Carm loved to self-sabotage and worry about him when his self-destructive mode was higher than usual, getting him pissed off on purpose was still fun. And in his head, it was much better to leave Carmy angry than to leave him alone drowning in his own sadness. - But you know, you are already old enough to make all your decisions... Even if they're stupid decisions. Or maybe I'm tripping, right cousin? - Richie gives a strong drag in the cigarette before throwing it on the floor and stepping on it to put it out. He goes back to the kitchen smiling knowing that he probably left Carmy even more stressed.

Carmy grumbles ''fucking asshole'' throwing the cigarette in his direction, even though Richie has already entered the kitchen.

The boss takes a deep breath a few times trying to calm down before entering the kitchen as well.

He swallows all his pride, and desire to freak out for the fourth time on the day on the side, and enters the kitchen.

[X]

- Listen, you're not giving me the opportunity to explain why I don't want to leave. - Lip and Tami are in the room discussing once again. Tami still hopes to convince Lip to leave that place.

– Yes, I gave Lip, I listened to everything you had to say. And I've already given you solutions, and if we're going to have a child, which also I don't if I want,I don't want him to grow up here. I want him to have more than we both had in life.

The evil of the two was short patience, especially Lip's, the two were stubborn and would insist on their personal ideas and would not give them up so easily, even if it was for each other.

They start talking at the same time, arguing, the two talking without listening to each other.

''Look, you don't understand, yes I understood, no no, this place, it's part of who I am, you're part of who I am that's why I want you to come with me, Tami for the love of God listen to me, Lip I've heard''

– Okay okay, Lip stop, stop. That's not working. We're fighting too much, and we're not listening to each other. - And it was true. She wanted it to work, and Lip needed them both to work. - Listen. What if, I go–

She was nervous about this possibility she thought about because she knew that Lip would not accept it very well.

– No. Don't do that, Tami. - He knows where this conversation is going, and he doesn't like it at all. His voice was tired and a little exasperated.

The sunlight coming through the window makes his blue eyes look colder more than they already are, he already feels that he is losing her. His heart was beating hard, and he felt warmth in his hands and nape. It was fear, anxiety and your patience going down the drain.

- Lip listening to me. - She continues, looking at him and knowing how he's already breaking inside. - I'm going to Milwaukee, I'm going to spend 1, maybe 2 months there. Let's not take a break, it's not a breakup. It's a test.

– And do you really believe that? Really? It's the first time in my life that I have a normal life in this fucking house. At my house. This thing about being away for two months won't happen. It really won't.

- So think of something better Lip. - She gets up, taking the keys and her bag.

– What's that? Where are you going?

– If I stay here, we'll fight even more. I'm going to a friend's house, and tomorrow is a new day where we will have more patience to have a conversation.

– C'mon that's not fucking serious.

– I'm sorry but it is. I have a damage control to do.- She approaches Lip, the sunlight is rested on their faces. - I'm not going to give up so easily from both of us. But this, is fucking killing me, Gallagher.

[X]

– She was here... Hm.

- Yeah. - Sugar and Carmy were talking, it was the first time she touched on the subject ''Donna''.

– And... Did you two talked? - Carmy felt his anxiety growing and anchored in his chest every time he said something new about his mother.

– Why?

– I don't know, you're pregnant and she's our mother, and she didn't knew. I-I don't know... Did you talked to her?

– I did. It was horrible.

– What a surprise. What did she say?

– It was... Well, weird. It wasn't what I expected. It doesn't matter, she wasn't here before and she won't come now just because of that.

– You saying that? I thought you still had hope in her.

- Me too. - They share a look of understanding, even though they want to talk more and know they wouldn't.

- Hey Jeff. We need your help. - Tina interrupts them for a second.

- Go. - Nat says looking at his brother. And he goes.

[X]

It was only one 13:00, Tami had left, and Lip was alone in that house that has never been as quiet as it is now.

The hours went by and Lip wondered if it would be that bad to leave Chicago. If he was being too sentimental. He had a thousand thoughts in his mind and needed some break.

Drinking was no longer an option. As much as the will and the impulses to do were still there.

No smoking either, he already smoked at least 4 or 5 cigarettes a day, it was bad enough.

He was looking for another passing obsession in which he hoped to stay longer than the others and help in his harm reduction. So far, the one that lasted the longest was the reading, he had several and several and several books scattered in his house, in the cabin, under the bed, where the shampoo and conditioner was near the bathtub, inside the cup cabinet.

He mirrored all his obsessions with the house, he had a little of his mind everywhere.

He had already read most of the books he owns, and there were some in which he hadn't even touched yet, but he needed more, so he decided to go out to buy more books.

In the Chicago public library, Lincoln Belmont branch, there were not many people, he was in the psychological terror session. An elderly man was staring at him and he noticed, but not the attention.

– From the hospital they keep him strictly isolated, confined and with as little human contact as possible. Those who have already tried to cure the patient, or even approach him ended up indulging in madness... or suicide... Wow. We are the same. - Lip reads the synopsis of the book to himself.

- I'm so sorry, Carm. - A old man says stopping in front of Lip.

– Ahm... Excuse me? - Before answering him, Lip stares at him for a few seconds blinking his eyes deciding if that old man was talking to him or someone else nearby. But there was no one but them in that corridor.

– Look, I know that Michael and I weren't exactly best friends, and I never came back to say... Nothing. But, I... I'm sorry.

Lip had a memory lapse where he saw Frank remembering memories that even he didn't remember properly. Maybe that man was like his father, maybe he's crazy, maybe he's in pain, and what kind of man would Philip Gallagher be if he didn't give a little comfort to this stranger who actually didn't seem to have gone crazy, or who was a drunk, or who had dementia, but only in mourning?

– I appreciate it. Really. - He said with a slightly worried tone, hoping that that stranger would be better than whatever he were suffering for.

The old man, who had a book in his hand, releases it in any shelf and nods his head, looking sad, and turns his back leaving the bookstore.

– But these tools have also transformed how we consume, and how we think about, our food. In Consider the Fork. Unexpected.

Lip leaves the book there and buys the first one he read the synopsis. Leaving there, he lights a cigarette and walks back home.

[neeharlow]

This isn't a thing asking for money, I just need to vent about a few recent events. The first thing, my husband and I are struggling. He had a good paying job, about 6k a month. But this job was soul sucking and stressful for him. Now, if he had the correct amount of support staff it wouldn't be nearly as bad. Because he had worked from being a regular security guard to an account manager he knows the hardship that the guards go through. He knows they are paid like shit. He would often have to ask people to work over time. But that's the thing. He would ask. Not once did he ever try to force someone to work overtime. He himself would fill in the position if no one was willing to work. So he'd often have to go to work on Saturdays or Sundays which happened to be over an hour away and that's not with Los Angeles/Inland Empire traffic. His officers were often times very fucking childish and would argue or complain about the work they had to do. Which he understood, totally not paid enough to dal with that level of shit. But it's still the job. Do the freaking job. Anyway, the company lost the account so he lost the position. (Oh and once everyone found out they were losing their jobs they turned on him and started telling lies about him to HR which he thankfully was able to prove were all false.) Now he's back to being a normal guard. And he's honestly a lot happier with his post. Nights. Walking back and forth in a truck yard. He gets to listen stuff on his phone and even better he doesn't have to deal with people. The only problem is he went from making 6k a month to 2k. Which I know is more than a pot of people make. And he is very thankful he even has the job. But after car payments, rent, groceries, insurance... we're in the negative. I get 1300 a month from disability (aka why after 18 years together we aren't married). My account is for rent. Thank god we live with his parents so we're not at risk of losing the roof over our heads.. mostly. His dad is a powder keg sometimes and has been emotionally abusive to him and his brothers so he avoids him like the plague. We have 22k in debt due to stupid stupid choices on both our parts. (in the past he got addicted to Star Wars Galaxy of Heros and ended up racking up 25k worth of mobile microtransactions. We have since gotten out of that debt. My vice is fast food delivery.)

He is willing to take on another job until we get out of debt. But that will not end well. I refuse to let him work all day, sleep for three hours and then work all night. It's not healthy. He has BPD and ADHD so it's a real emotional struggle to just keep up with this job. He already lost his health insurance so he's also unmedicated. With my health issues (dead kidneys, failing liver, Bipolar, ADHD, and heart issues.) I cannot get a job even if I wanted one. No employer in this day and age would let me have two days a week for dialysis not to mention all the medical appointments I have to go to. Plus I'm on the transplant list for liver and kidney, if I get that call that's automatically at least a year off of said work.

I know there are people worse off than us. I'm not dumb enough to think our problems are world ending. We are safe. We have a roof over our heads. That's more than a lot of people have. And we will come out of this eventually. His parents are also struggling so we can't really rely on them for anything. I'm just worried about him.

I'll make a different post for the other thing. :/

[half-developed-frontal-lobe]

It's not just Tracer either, I do find Kiriko, Reinhardt, and other's interactions...slightly bare? Dry. It's very superficial and one dimension.

Tracer, without a doubt, has incredible guilt about Mondatta's death. I feel like when they transitioned to the new game, they deep scrubbed everything and anything negative at some point, when they should have drilled it in a little bit more.

Now, with Null Sector attacking, I feel like there would be some sort of shadowed relapse. The sunshine character is losing her spark. If Mondatta didn't die, maybe this wouldn't have happened. Null Sector would not be attacking the world right now. If she had done something different maybe, stopped pulling her punches, pushed her limits with her time, and end up physically draining herself more, maybe the Omnics wouldn't be getting subjugated.

You'd see it effect her relationships with those she surrounds herself with, and though she wants to look on the brighter side of things, it could be her in denial about how much stress she has on her mind. Not only that? But the omnics lining Toronto's train station? Catatonic states and motionless? Could you imagine the terror of thinking that her one act of survival just caused millions of deaths if no one told her they were in a sleep state?

Effects on Lena?

- She'd be trying to take more punches. Nasty ones at that. Putting herself in danger more often, because if she can't take the hit, then someone she cares for will.

- Aggression towards people joining. I feel like she should be a little bit more wary with Baptiste. He's from Talon, and sometimes it feels like nobody is on edge with that. I understand the heartfelt moment with Fareeha and Cassidy, but some things are far too simple for all of them to just get along with it.

We the audience know he's a good guy, but that doesn't mean that the ingame characters should.

If Blizzard hits you with a, 'well it's been a few days since the PVE and heroes ascendant, some heroes are cool with-'

Don't give me that crap. How are people supposed to know how time is passing through this universe when there's no milestones to mark it within game?

- Aggression against Ram and Talon. Is much needed. Widowmaker and her lines seem too light.

'I have to work with you?'

'Babysitting is not part of my services.'

'Thats a relief, who'd trust you with a baby?'

When I heard Torb's voice lines in OW classic, it had me deep thinking:

Just seems too...cutesy? This is the same person who killed Mondatta and possibly lit the powder keg of the Null Sector invasion.

If you want good voice lines, you actually need your players to stop in the spawn room to think about what they just heard.

But it seems like a lot of these voice lines are missing that type of punch, and shielding the audience away from the deeper sides of these characters. There is so much more to the optimistic characters like Tracer, and they completely remove part of her complexity by sugarcoating her interactions.

'Oh shit, that's right. He used to be extremely hateful towards omnics and robots because of the Omnic Crisis.'

We are able to make that connection that this character does not want to be anywhere near an Omnic or the Monastery, and is very much outspoken about how uncomfortable they are when being around certain areas and people.

With the Widow/Tracer voice line, sure, you can assume their relationship with each other isn't good, but it lacks aggressiveness. There should be a sharper line between the two. One where it conveys to the audience Lena's trauma and her loathing towards Widow. Where it shows Widow's remorseless attitude towards her own actions.

This would give such a large insight on Lena's character altogether, and Amelié's if written well.

I've been less motivated to post here lately because I only seem to have negative things to say about the modern state of Overwatch. I know damn well how annoying that is. In the words of Chris Griffin: "Why are you so fucking negative all the time?"

Alas, Lena "Tracer" Oxton is my original character, and I will forever be upset about how the newer developers don't seem to understand them.

First, Black Cat Tracer still drives me up the wall because they would not wear that, but even in the matching spray and name card, they don't have any of their personality. Lena has always been more puppy-coded than kitty-coded, anyway. I get it, though. Let's appease the homophobic straight men who play this game-- and Tracer, in particular-- for a living because that's where the money's at.

Then, I played Overwatch Classic, and as much as it made me appreciate how far the game has come in the few matches where I played any other hero, it is undeniably a Tracer main's playground. Thus, I played fifteen matches of Tracer and Tracer only for the "Play 15 matches as an Offense hero in Overwatch Classic" challenge, but even in my first match, hearing the old Overwatch 1 voice lines was a breath of fresh air.

They used to sound so cool, calm, and collected. Still excited and enthusiastic, no doubt, but more gentle. The way I described it while ranting to my friends who don't play Overwatch is that Tracer's new lines mostly sound like hyperactive Marvel quips written by someone who only had an "incorrect quotes taken from Vines" grasp on their personality and completely Flanderized them in the process.

This is Overwatch 2 Tracer's writing to me:

Sure, they are a silly and clumsy character at heart, but way to overdo it! Also, I still think the person who wrote the "Caught you staring!" line should be flayed alive in front of their family.

Speaking of Overwatch 1 interactions, I also realized how similar many of Overwatch 2's are. I already ranted in a previous post about how Lena used to be angrier towards Talon members-- take going from "It wouldn't be a problem if you just disappeared forever" to "Whoopsie-daisy, I got locked out of my phone," for example. In the same post, I also ranted about how Lena's new interaction with Illari feels like a duplicate of the one with Ashe.

Now, imagine the disappointment I felt when I heard the interaction they used to have with Genji about their survivor's guilt over Mondatta while playing Overwatch Classic and went through Overwatch 2's interactions to confirm my suspicions that they never take a similar tone in the glorified update latter game. They talk about the Slipstream Incident with D.Va and Mercy in Overwatch 2's spawn room interactions, but both times, they only say "Teehee! I can't believe I got lost in time! My bad!"

I know these newer interactions tend to be written by interns in their early twenties, as said interns would always celebrate on Twitter whenever their work got added to the game. Still, as a fellow early-twenty-something-year-old, the drop in quality to hiring actual, experienced writers shows. The only time we get an idea of how Lena copes with their baffling amount of trauma is when Emily tells us, the audience, in the Story Missions that they often fixate on something for hours straight to distract themself.

Whatever, man. Every time Blizzard makes a joke out of Lena "Tracer" Oxton, I give them a new mental illness in my canon rewrite. There are always new ways to torture my homunculus.

[hockeyboysimagines]

Bitter

Chapter 5

Warnings: Sex, implied sex, sexual references, teeny bit of angst, mentions of bars, alcohol, vomiting and Kaitlin being a sneaky bitch.

I am sure there are spelling and grammatical errors in here. No one is perfect and I’ve been staring at this for hours now. I’ll come back in and make corrections tomorrow, just a PSA before some rude person makes a comment.

Hi all! Here is a chapter for you. I’ve had the worst writers block ever the past few weeks but I honestly watched a bunch of hockey fights and I feel much better. I’d also like to let everyone know Zack MacEwen has officially been added to my Who I write for, which you can find on my Masterlist, which I’ll link here, because he is so hot and dirty and I’m in love with him.

I hope you all enjoy this chapter! Let me know what you think🤍

“What’s your deal?” Mat asked bumping Beau’s shoulder.

“Huh?”

“I mean what’s up with you. You seem weird.”

“Oh nothing. Just tired from the trip this weekend.” Mat frowned and he quick added in “Dealing with Ginny for any amount of time is exhausting. Let alone hours.” Historically, Beau had never been a good liar, and this was a big lie he needed to sell. He’d been thinking about it a lot over the last few days.

If Ginny hadn’t been so dead set against Mat and Leighton finding out, he really wouldn’t have cared. He knew deep down it had less to do with the fact that she hated him, and more to do with the idea of admitting she might like him even a little bit.

“Right. We appreciate it a lot though you know, me more than anyone considering this is my fault.” Mat seemed less stressed this morning. He’d expressed to Beau more than once that he felt an immense amount of crushing guilt over the whole thing.

“Barz , you gotta stop blaming yourself man. What’s happening now, is happening cuz Kaitlin is fucking crazy. You could never have known she was going to react this way.”

“I know, but still. I should have just admitted to myself that I wasn’t over her in the beginning and maybe we wouldn’t be dealing with this bullshit.”

“Maybe not, but maybe she’d have reacted the same way. No one can say. Either way.” He gave him a slap on the shoulder “We got your back. I can’t punch a girl, but Ginny can and she will and I should have let her do it.”

Mat laughed and ran a hand through his hair “Well like I said before, thank you. And maybe you should have, but I don’t think it would have helped anything. But you guys came in clutch with taking the trip for us. We owe you guys, and appreciate it a lot.”

“You better. The director made us walk arm in arm down the aisle.” Beau smiled a little at the memory, and chuckled.

“Bet Ginny loved that one.”

“She did but she’d never admit it.”

Mat laughed and shook his head as they sat down for tape review.

“Seriously though. That was exactly what Leighton needed. She seems better already.”

“Yeah. As much as Ginny and I disagree we both love Leighton so we were happy to do it.”

He paid very little attention during game tape review, thoughts of Leighton and Ginny, and Kaitlin swirling around in his head. There was a lot of feelings invested in this wedding and outside of this wedding. It had been a powder keg from the start, but his involvement with Ginny had rattled everything.

He really did feel bad. He’d promised Mat, Leighton, and God that he wasn’t going to do this and he did.

And he wanted to do it again.

*************

Ginny avoided Beau at all costs the next few days, and buried herself in her work. She didn’t really need an excuse to want to be away from him, but now more than ever she wanted to be. She was still mildly repulsed with herself that she’d had sex with him in the first place, and she did everything in her power to oust the whole evening out of her head.

It did not work.

It was especially hard when he was texting her.

B:Are you okay?

G: I haven’t seen you in days so why wouldn’t I be?

B: Haha, so you wanna do it again? And don’t bother with your ice queen act anymore. I see right through that.

She deleted his messages just as Leighton poked her head around the door and smiled at her.

“Hey best friend!”

Ginny looked up startled and smiled back “Hi! How was the rest of the weekend?” She out on her best fake smile and leaned forward. Leighton looked much better, happier, like the Leighton she knew and loved.

And it broke Ginny’s heart because she had no idea what was happening behind her back.

“It was great. I feel better.” She sat down in her chair and crossed her legs before fixing Ginny with a look.

“So everything was good with the venue? I got the email saying it has been approved.”

“Yes. The venue is beautiful. They ran us through how the day would go, how the reception is set up, and they have all the decor on lockdown so the wicked with of the west doesn’t try any sabotage.”

Leighton nodded and pursed her lips “You don’t think she’d come do you? I mean that would be crazy.”

“Well she is obviously and even if she does, she won’t make it inside. Beau and I talked about it and we’re gonna be keeping an eye out.”

“You guys talked? That’s impressive.”

Ginny coughed and chose her words carefully “Uh yeah….a little. We’re both worried about it, and as much as we hate each other we hate her more. So I guess we can forge some kind of bond over that. But I still don’t like him.” she added for good measure. She felt like she was giving herself away by saying anything nice about him “He was a real pain is the ass on the trip, but for you, I’d do anything.” She felt a sinking feeling that could only be described as guilt settle in her heart. She hated lying to Leighton, something she swore she would never do. And here she was doing it. She would never ever forgive herself for this, and she would carry it around forever and all because she broke the promise she made to herself.

“I know, and I’m so thankful for that. We both are. And who knows maybe by the time the wedding is over you guys will become friends?”

Ginny chuckled and shuffled the papers on her desk “Not likely.”

***********

Ethan was a nice guy, who worked three offices down from Ginny. After several months of small talk, he’d finally asked Leighton if Ginny was single.

Which is how he plucked up the courage to ask Ginny out himself. He was sweet, all American boy, the kind you take home to mom and dad. Ginny, who was so desperate to repress any feelings of Beau that lingered said yes, and made plans for Friday.

She was seated at Leighton’s kitchen island when she heard the door open and two sets of footsteps enter. She closed her eyes and let out a long breath. She hadn’t seen him since that weekend and she didn’t wanna see him ever again. She fought internally to fight the redness that was creeping up her neck, and stared pointedly at the wall until she absolutely had to look at him.

He was watching her, face expressionless and they held eye contact for a few moments before he looked away.

“So are you feeling better?” He asked Leighton, eyes peeking at Ginny as she answered.

“Much better. You two are amazing for helping out this weekend. I hope it wasn’t too much of an inconvenience.” Leighton said as she left the room to follow Mat to their bedroom to get the laundry.

“For you? Never. Right Gin?” Ginny nodded and gave Leighton a tight lipped smile.

“And besides. Me and Ginny needed some quality time together. I feel like I really got to know her this weekend.” He glanced at Ginny again and stretched, shirt riding up to reveal several inches of abs and she pointedly looked away.

Damn him.

“Ew.” She mumbled giving him a disgusted look. He smiled a little, enjoying that he was beginning to get a rise out of her.

“It’s okay Gin. Looking is for free, but touching is going to cost you.”

“No amount of money would be enough to touch you.”

Leighton rolled her eyes and turned to grab the laundry basket. Once she was out of earshot he spoke again.

“Never say never.” He stood and walked up behind her, chest brushing against her back “Sometimes all it takes is one night” he whispered, scruff ticking her neck. She glared at him, and then looked up at the ceiling in an attempt to collect herself.

She made an excuse to leave a little while later, practically bolting out the door and down the hall as quickly as she could so he wouldn’t follow her. She fell asleep uneasy, and pushed him out of her mind in preparation for her date the next evening.

***********

Ethan was in fact a very nice guy. He’d picked her up, held the door, and pulled out her chair for her and now he was dutifully listening to her talk about Leighton��s wedding.

“Sounds like quite the saga. You seem like your a good friend to her.”

“I try to be. This wedding has been especially stressful.”

“How so?” He leaned forward, genuinely interested in what she was saying, and it hurt her.

Because she didn’t like him at all.

She would let him down as easy as she could, and be as nice about it as possible but she really didn’t have a single romantic feeling in her body that could make her like him even a little bit. But she smiled and put on a good show as she told him about Kaitlin.

“That’s insane! Leighton is marrying Mat Barzal right? Big Islanders fan.” Ginny laughed a little and nodded.

“Yes she is.”

“We’ll I hope it all works out for her. Your the made of honor right? Do you have to walk with-“

“Yeah.” Ginny cut him off “And I hate him.”

“Oh. Sorry I didn’t-he seems like such a nice guy.“

“It’s okay. He’s just-we don’t get along. But enough about him.”

Ethan changed the subject and started talking about something she didn’t really care about. Midway thought the conversation she felt a pair of eyes on her. She had a lot of eyes on her most of the time, but this time it felt different. She glanced around, and all at once, she glanced up to find Beau had materialized on a barstool less than ten feet away.

“Goddamnit.” She whispered under her breath as he half turned and met her eye, smiling at her. He looked good, even better than the last time she’d seen him, strong arms braced on the bar, one giant hand wrapped around a glass, large smile stretched across his face.

“What did you say?” Etha asked leaning forward.

“Oh hum nothing-nothing.”

“Uh huh. Uhm I’m gonna use the bathroom, I’ll be back.” He gave her an sweet smile and excused himself. She watched him sadly knowing she would break the poor boys heart, and then remembered her arch nemesis was only a few feet away. Ginny stood, walked forward and slapped her hand on the bar to get his attention. He turned, smile getting wider and he raised his glass.

“Gin! Funny seeing you here-“

“What do you want?” She snapped wanting nothing more than to slap that stupid smile and other off his face. She couldn’t believe he was here, and that he was so boldly trying to ruin a date she didn’t even want to be on.

“How’s your date?” He was grinning slyly at her over his glass. Ethan may have been fooled by Ginny’s poker face, but he wasn’t. From where he was sitting there wasn’t even a tiny bit of interest from Ginny’s end, because Ethan wasn’t the kind of guy she would ever show any interest in. He was too nice, like a puppy staring at her when she talked. She was too much for him to handle. But she was just enough for Beau. She was glaring at him, cheeks turning the color of her hair. He let his eyes drift down her appreciatively. She had on a pair of ridiculously tight jeans that hugged every inch of long legs, and a dark grey sweater. Her hair, which was his favorite thing about her, was hanging loose falling across her back and shoulders.

Damn she was hot.

“Fine thank you very much. Not that it’s any of your business.”

“Really? Cuz it doesn’t look like your having much fun. Not as much fun as we had anyways.”

She could feel herself getting redder by the minute and rolled her eyes, blowing a breath angrily out of her nose.

“That was a one time thing-“

“I think it was a multiple in one night time thing.”

She stared at him for a few moments. He’d been the only guy she’d ever come across who could get her so worked up, before he even really did anything to her. Something about him just pissed her off. He was so smug, so full of himself, and so fucking hot. He pulled himself off the barstool and crowded her, pushing her right up against the ledge of the bar, hand resting on her hip. Her breath hitched as he leaned forward to whisper in her ear.

“We both know that your going to leave here with me so let’s cut through the red tape and get out of here now, and get the evening rolling. I’m not playing any games tonight.”

“I’m on a date-“

“Find a way to be not on a date. Tell the boyscout you had a family emergency or something. I don’t care, but let’s go.”

Ginny bit her lip and looked over his shoulder. Ethan was still in the bathroom and as much as she knew it was wrong, the feeling of his chest pushed up against her made her weak in the knees, and wet between the legs. He extended his hand, pulling her along behind him. When they exited the bar he stopped, and turned to face her, hands coming to either side of her waist. Unable to stop himself he leaned forward and kissed her forcefully, pulling all the air from her lungs.

She gasped pulling away from him after a few moments when a pair of headlights coming to a stop in front of them caught her attention.

“How did you get an Uber so fast?”

“I ordered it the minute I saw you across the bar.”

“You asshole.”

“Whatever. Lets go.”

Ginny felt terrible, and conjured up a lie, a good one and sent Ethan a text.

G: sorry had an emergency, we should do this again sometime though. I had a nice night.

Beau had a smug smile on his face, and she wanted to slap him, but she was also practically shaking in anticipation for what the rest of the evening would hold.

**************

“No Ginny tonight?” Mat asked as he came up behind Leighton while she was cooking. Ginny made it a point to come to dinner at the apartment every Friday, mostly just to spend time with them but also to try and keep Leighton’s mind off Kaitlin.

“No she’s actually on a date.”

“A date?” Mat frowned “Without Beau?”

Leighton made a face but smiled “If he knew she was on one he’d find a way to go mess it up I’m sure.”

“True. Are you doing okay? You seem…someplace else.”

“I’m okay. I just-I have the strangest feeling.”

“What do you mean?” He seated himself at the kitchen island and leaned forward. She turned, brows knitting together and placed a hand on her hip.

“I’m not sure really. I just have a feeling that something is going on, but I can’t put my finger on what it could be.”

“Like with the wedding?”

“Yeah I guess….I don’t know it weird. Probably just stress and anxiety from the whole Kaitlin thing.” She turned back to the stove and shrugged.

“Hey.” He stood and turned her to face him, hands coming to rest on either side of her hips “No one is gonna ruin this day for you. I promise. Okay?”

She smiled and nodded “Okay.” But then her face changed. She coughed and covered her mouth with her hand, body shuddering a little.

“Are you gonna throw up?” He took a step back and turned her to face the sink.

“No I’m okay. I just don’t feel well today, and I haven’t eaten.”

“Leighton we talked about this.” He side stepped her to get to the fridge and pulled out a water bottle “You have to take care of yourself. This running yourself ragged with wedding stuff has to stop.”

“I know. I promise I won’t do it again.” She drank some water and resumed what she was doing, still not feeling well.

A while later she found herself kneeling on the floor of the bathroom Mat concerned behind her “Maybe we should go see a doctor?” Mat questioned from behind her, hands entangled in her hair while she leaned over the toilet.

She was a horrible shade of grey, and sweat had seeped through her T-shirt, and ran down her face. He leaned around to look at her but she swatted him away.

“Don’t look at me.”

“Stop. What do they say during weddings? For rich or for poor-?”

“In sickness and in health? Shouldn’t you know that?”

“I never got that far before.”

Even while hovering over a toilet Leighton chuckled a little, and leaned her forehead on her forearm “Your an idiot.”

“But I made you laugh didn’t I?” He rubbed her back soothingly as another bout of vomit gurgled up her throat.

*************

The headboard of Beau’s bed rocked against the wall, surely waking all his neighbors but he didn’t care. Her eyes were closed and he just couldn’t get over how fucking beautiful she looked under him, hair messy, face flushed her body arched against his. She was so sensitive to his touch and he almost felt bad for the poor schmuck she had left at the bar who was missing out on this tonight.

Now that he’d her once, he knew he had to have her again. He had turned down his regular Saturday night hookup with no real guarantee that she would even come home with him, but when he saw her eyeing him from a cross the club he was determined to get her back in his bed.

Mission accomplished.

“Fuck.” She swore, nails scraping along his neck.

He was panting in her ear and starting to sweat as he moved in and out of her going deeper and deeper.

“Harder.” His hand closed around her throat and she closed her eyes.

“I said harder.”

He bit down hard on the skin of her neck and she cried out with a gasp “You fucker-“

“Your so goddamn tight. Fuck.” He cursed face buried in her hair. He pulled one leg up over his shoulder and pushed in even deeper. Her skin was balmy under his hands and the shimmer of sweat that had appeared over her chest and abdomen was catching the light from outside.

“Ohmygod.” She moaned out. His pushes became erratic and the moaning became louder. She let out a strangled cry as he rammed into her brutally a few times before collapsing on top of her, kissing her sloppily tounge leaving a wet trail around her mouth. She let her hands run across his jaw tugging lightly on the stubble there as she eagerly kissed back.

He pulled away from her, forehead resting in her neck as he attempted to even his breathing. He felt her stiffen suddenly beneath him.

“Get off me.” She said, eyes burning up at him. She was frowning and looked disgusted with him.

He chuckled a little and eased himself out and on to the bed next to her “There’s the Ginny I know.”

“First of all, you don’t know me. And second of all-“

“Can you just shut up for like 2 seconds and enjoy the moment?”

Ginny huffed and wiggled away from him, arms crossed to prevent him from touching her. Even though he’d literally just fucked her brains out two minutes ago, she was laying in his bed acting like she didn’t even want him to breathe the same air as her.

“What is this anyways?” She asked finally. He could only see her profile, the light from the outside only throwing enough to make her out faintly, but he could her the uncertainty in her question.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean this. What is this.” She gestured between them and sat up, pulling the sheet up to cover herself. Her hair was a mess, and she had a hickey on the side of her neck, which she would have to figure out a way to explain, but she wasn’t worried about that right now.

“It whatever you want it to be Ginny.”

“That’s not an answer.”

“I don’t have answer.”

She frowned and turned her head away from him. The silence in the room was suffocating till she spoke again.

“You know. I’m not some plaything.”

He felt a little guilty for a moment. The way she said it sounded sad and painful, and he wondered if having sex with him was actually making her life worse. He didn’t think of her as a plaything. He knew her, he’d shared time with her, she wasn’t some random girl he met in a bar. She’d become a facet in his everyday life, and she would continue to be one long after the wedding. They had been pushed together by fate, and they would stay that way for as long as Mat and Leighton stayed married.

“I-I know that.”

“Do you?” She still faced away from him, but her voice was small.

“Yes I do. Look.” He sat up and turned her to face him “I don’t know what this is, besides unexpected but I don’t wanna stop. I know that.”

She bit her lip “Me neither. But what will we tell them?”

“We won’t. We’re consenting adults and what happens between us is no one else’s business. Right?”

“Right…So we’re just hooking up?” She finger quoted, and waited for him to answer her. She looked skeptical, and was leaning away from him. Her wall, which had been down just a few moments ago, was now slowly rising up. He could see it plain as day on her face that she didn’t trust him, and that she was bracing herself for what he would say next.

“Do you wanna? Keep hooking up I mean? I don’t wanna stop but if your not cool with it then we can forget this ever happened.”

Ginny laughed softly and shook her head, the smallest flicker of something behind her eyes before she spoke again “I couldn’t forget this if I tried.”

************

Kaitlin was parked outside of Beau’s apartment scheming.

She’d been there for a while now. She had realized, that she would need to dismantle the wedding from the inside out and the easiest way to get to Mat was through Beau.

He had never liked her. He had never even tried to like her, and she didn’t like him either. He was just another person in Mat’s life who didn’t want to see them together, because they all wanted him with the dumb bitch who broke his heart four years ago.

And what did they know?

They weren’t the ones who listened to him ramble on and on about how much he still loved her. They hadn’t helped him pick up each piece of his heart and carefully, and painfully put it back together. They didn’t have to ouch their feelings down, and listen to him drone on about a girl when she was practically screaming in front of him that she could be better than her. They didn’t know anything.

Kaitlin wiped at a tear. She knew she sounded crazy but she was so broken and consumed by the fact that she’d done everything right. She’d followed all the rules. And they all still loved Leighton more.

His friends. His family.

And even Mat himself.

She was jarred from her thoughts however when she saw Beau open the door to the complex, and turn to speak to someone behind him. She could see it was a girl, and at first she thought it was just someone he was hooking up with, but when she came into the light she realized it was Ginny.

Kaitlin watched in awe as an Uber pulled up to the sidewalk and Ginny turned to him. They spoke for a few moments before he pulled Ginny forward into a kiss so searing, she had to look away. There was no way Mat and Leighton knew about this, or they wouldn’t be sneaking around after dark together. It would surely cause some drama, and definite rift. If they were lying to them about their involvement, the truth coming out could be catastrophic.

She watched as Ginny smiled, got into the car and it drove away, disappearing from sight as he made his way back into his complex. He stopped suddenly at the door and turned to look over his shoulder, eyes moving up and down the street. Kaitlin ducked, and once she was sure he hadn’t seen her she peeked over the dash. He had gone back in his complex, and Kaitlin started her car, smiling a little.

This was the in she needed.

************

Ginny dropped her purse on the floor by her front door and kicked off her shoes. She was exhausted, too tired to even shower as she shed her clothing on the way to her room, leaving it laying on the floor.

She slipped on an oversized T-shirt and crawled into bed, wrapping her knees up to her chest. She felt like she couldn’t breathe, eyes closing.

A single tear slipped out of her eye, and dripped across her nose on to her bed. It was followed by another one, and another as they formed a large wet spot on her sheets. Every emotion she’d been holding, for what felt like her whole life, was pouring out of her eyes, drowning her. Pain wracked her with a loud sob, as she gripped the fabric of her pillow as tightly as she could.

She squeezed her eyes shut, in an attempt to stop the tears but they continued to fall freely. Sleep came easy, tears still on her face and Beau still on her mind.

**************

“Knock knock.” Leighton glanced up from her desk, and was surprised to see Ethan standing in her doorway. She’d only had a few interactions with him but he seemed like a nice guy, which is why she set him up with Ginny in the first place.

“Ethan, hi. What’s up?”

He looked around awkwardly, hands in his pockets “Have you-have you talked to Ginny?”

“Not today, I don’t think she’s here yet. Why?”

“Well Things were going great last night, and then I went to the bathroom and she was gone, and she said she had some kind of emergency or something. I’m just hoping she’s okay?”

Leighton frowned “An emergency? I mean she didn’t say anything to me, but I haven’t talked to her since yesterday. Did something happen?”

He shrugged “I don’t think so. We were talking about your wedding and then she just disappeared.” He looked a little sad standing in her doorway.

“Im sure she had some kind of emergency or something. I’ll talk to her and find out.” Leighton felt another wave of sickness rise in her throat and she covered her mouth. Ethan looked at her concerned.

“Are you alright? Do you need me to call-“

“No I’m fine, I’m just stressed is all. I forgot to eat today. But don’t worry I’ll talk to her.”

“Thanks Leighton. I really like her, and I definitely wanna go out with her again sometime.”

“No problem.”

He gave her a smile and left her office. Ginny was a no show the rest of the day, the receptionist told Leighton she had called in sick.

She pulled out her phone and sent her a message.

Hey, Carol said you were sick today? Do you need anything? How was your date last night?

The typing bubble appeared and then disappeared several times before she answered.

Hey, no I’m good just a cold but thanks❤️ The date went great, I had a good time. He didn’t bring me home till late so I didn’t wanna text you and wake you. I’ll fill you in Monday. Lets do lunch?

Sure. Hope you feel better. Get lots of rest and let us know if you need us.

Something was up.

She had the strangest feeling as she made her way home, and entered the apartment. Mat was sitting on the sofa, and tipped his head back and smiled at her.

“Hey babe. How was work? Im surprised your home this-“ he stopped when he looked at her. She was pale and sweaty, dark circles under her eyes.

“I only went in for a few hours. It was fine-What?”

“Did you eat today?”

Leighton set her purse down and turned to him slowly, chewing on her lip “I forgot. I’m sorry.” Mat sighed and shook his head but she continued talking “Ethan came by my office today.”

“Ethan? The guy Gin went out with?”

“Yeah. He said she left suddenly because of an emergency.”

“What kind of an emergency?”

“I don’t know. But she told me she had a good time and that he brought her home late, and now she said she’s sick.” Leighton wiped the sweat from her forehead and leaned on the arm of the sofa.

Mat frowned “That’s very…odd.”

“Did she seem weird to you? The past couple days she just seems off.”

“I guess. Ginny is moody though so I haven’t really thought anything of it. Maybe it’s just stress. She’s been pretty upset about all this wedding stuff. And it seems like she isn’t the only one.” He reached up to touch her forehead “Do you need to see a doctor?”

“I know, but there’s something else. I can’t put my finger on it but something is going on. She’s hiding something from me. And no I’m fine. Just stress, and I think I have a stomach bug.”

“What would she be hiding? You guys know everything about each other. I didn’t think you kept secrets. I’m sure that’s all it is, but if it continues then you should see a doctor. Okay?”

“We don’t…usually.”

Mat pursed his lips, eyebrows coming together “Do you want me to try and talk to her? She might not tell you if it’s wedding stuff because she wants to keep you stress free.”

“Okay. That would be great. Thank you.” She leaned forward to kiss him and then smiled “I’m going to go change.” He stared at her pointedly until she added “And eat something.”

************

Knock knock

Ginny opened her apartment door at 7:30 that evening to find Beau leaning on the other side.

“Hey.”

“Hi.” She said leaning her head on the door. She was wide eyed, staring at him with an unreadable expression “What are you doing here?”

“I don’t know. I just thought maybe I wanted to see you is all.” He reached forward and let his finger slide across her shoulder to untangle a lock of hair from her tank top strap. A trail of goosebumps bloomed across her skin as his finger slid down, and gripped her wrist “Unless you want me to leave.”

She shook her head and opened the door wider, hand slipping into his as she pulled him inside the door, closing it just as he pressed his lips to hers.

[ttuesday]

Hi-hi! How would the fellers react to their crush verbally defending them in front of the others?

Arthur

While picking up some supplies in town, Arthur got into a small ‘altercation’ with some of the locals. Returning to camp, Arthur has bruised knuckles and a small cut on his cheek. It doesn’t take long for Dutch to reprimand him, reminding Arthur that it's imperative they all keep a low profile.

Afterwards the rest of camp decide to give Arthur a hard time, pissed off that Dutch has restricted people leaving camp because of the fight. Instead of confronting Dutch with their frustrations, they turn to Arthur and make snide comments towards him. You quickly confront the gang, angry at how fast they all turn to blame Arthur.

You basically tell everyone to suck it up and if they have a problem then they should talk to Dutch about it. No one wants to argue with you so they all drop it pretty quickly. Arthur is in awe of you, muttering a thank you under his breath as he passes by. 

He doesn't want to make a big deal about this, scared of making things weird by lingering on this for too long. No one's really done that for him before so it's something he thinks about for a very long time, getting a warm feeling in his chest whenever he thinks about you defending him. 

Charles

No one has any real reason to be mad at Charles and they know it isn't his fault but the camp's food supply is getting low and hunting has been tough lately so he's had no luck bringing any food back to camp either.

You first notice Micah throw him a snide remark about not being able to bring back any food, but considering it's Micah, you and Charles both brush off the comment and not waste any time on the other man. But then you notice another few people direct their frustrations Charles' way.

You snap the next time you hear someone blame Charles, telling them to go out and try hunting if they think it's so easy. They're taken aback by how suddenly you snap at them and don't mention it again. 

Charles is surprised too, not expecting anyone to stand up for him but makes sure to tell you how grateful he is to know you have his back. Charles knew he had a crush on you before this but now? Yeah, he's definitely in love.

Dutch

People were getting more and more pissed off with Dutch and his absurd plans. The stress of knowing people were getting frustrated made it harder from him to think of a proper plan, turning Dutch into a powder keg about to explode.

You could tell how the mounting pressure of everyone's annoyance was getting to him, how his answers became more short each time someone else would question his actions and doubt him. In a way, you thought it would be better if you snapped at everyone rather than Dutch doing it.

Everyone’s eyes go wide when you finally speak up, telling them that if they don’t like how Dutch runs things then they don’t have to stick around. Putting his hand on your shoulder, Dutch quietly thanks you, feeling a strange flustered feeling. 

With how stressed he is, Dutch isn’t too sure what he feels for you exactly but one thing he knows for sure is that his feelings for you have just gotten a whole lot stronger. A few days later, he mentions you defending him again, wanting you to know exactly how much it meant to him.

Micah

This is Micah. He's gonna piss off half the camp in about one hour. Everyone's reason is different but they're all annoyed at Micah and sick of the shit he says. But you’re so over the constant bickering by everyone and how they also insult him every chance they get.

One evening by the campfire, you decide you’ve had enough. You weren’t exactly planning on snapping and from the looks on everyone’s faces, they weren’t expecting it either. 

Micah is completely baffled, his face unreadable for a few seconds. This is so unnatural to him, to hear someone actually coming to his defence and not complaining about him truly leaves him lost for words. He’s stunned but soon a smug expression spreads across his face. 

Micah is all over you afterwards, constantly around you and basically taunting the others to try and insult him again. If anyone pisses him off then he makes sure to tell you just in case you feel like defending him one more time. 

John

John was doing what he does best, evading responsibility. At first it didn't really annoy anyone besides Miss Grimshaw and it kinda got under Hosea's skin but eventually it started grating on everyone, small problems occurring more and more often because of John's lack of competence.

It doesn’t take long for everyone to be picking problems with John, overwhelming him with complaints. You can see how much it’s all getting to him and so you step in. 

Everyone looks to you, quickly averting their eyes to the ground as you scold them. You’re not too harsh, just reminding them that there are bigger, Pinkerton sized problems that are more important than unchopped logs for the fire.

John is in awe. No one’s ever stood up for him as fast as you did. This is something he’s never going to forget and although he tries to play if off, mumbling that you didn’t have to go out of your way to defend him, it genuinely means a lot to him.

Javier

Although Javier rarely messes up on robberies, some of the gang still get pissed off whenever he occasionally fucks up. Honestly, Javier's beating himself up anyways because of his mess up so everyone else mentioning it just adds insult to injury and makes him feel terrible.

He’s having a bad day so although he would usually stand up for himself, Javier decides to simply sit there and listen to them complain. You on the other hand, refuse to let this happen and come to Javier’s defense.

Javier really didn’t expect anyone to defend him but the fact that it was you defending him made it much more special to him, his heart warming with every word you say in his defense. He watches you with adoration, loving how you scrunch up your nose in annoyance as you tell off the others. 

Afterwards he thanks you and asks if you’d like to go for a walk, he feels like he needs to talk to someone right now and he knows you’re always understanding when it comes to things like this.

Sean

Sean didn't necessarily do anything wrong, he was just in a very talkative and playful mood which made meant teasing the gang more than often than usual which pissed off a few people.

He tries to defend him but soon there are so many people interrupting him that he doesn’t bother and sits there pouting, listening to everyone’s complaints. When you first approach, he thinks that you’re going to get mad at him too but you turn to the others and scold them instead. 

As soon as you start at the others, Sean jumps up with new motivation and joins in, telling them to mind their own business. The more you scold the gang, the more excited Sean gets. 

When the last gang member gives up and storms off, Sean wraps his arms around you, lifting you up off the ground and practically swings you around. He acts as though you’ve both won a war and brags about how good of a team you two make.

Hosea

It takes a lot for people to get pissed off with Hosea but he had been promising the gang a good share of a con he had planned but it unfortunately went awry and left the gang disappointed.

The gang aren’t really mad at Hosea but because the con went south, they take their frustrations out on him. The second you realise what’s going on and that people are being snarky with Hosea, you confront them and defend him.

When you mention how shitty they’re being to him, everyone immediately apologises, feeling flustered that they were called out. Hosea accepts their apologies, knowing they were just feeling frustrated and prefers to move past this.

When the gang begin to carry on with their day, Hosea pulls you aside and thanks you for defending him. It means a lot to him and honestly when you stood up for him, he could feel a wave of relief wash over him. To properly thank you, Hosea invites you out on a con he’s positive will go to plan.

[roo-bastmoon]

When i'm having some free time I love watching jikook through the years. they really have such amazing "story" and you can see how vital they are to each other when it comes to support and happiness and trust. I cringe when I see some of their old stuff mainly because they were so young and filled with stress and doubts and hormons but 99% of their videos make me so so endeared. But one video caught my eye. I think it's probably the only time when I felt that Jimin was truly sad and bothered over jungkook as a person and not just over wanting his affection or friendship, and it was in this link 22:00 https://youtu.be/vSYNMGovHDs and I'm saying it only because Hobi seemed angry and Jimin stated that he wants jungkook to leave even when jungkook apologizing and maybe not realizing what's so wrong, which didn't happen often. I feel bad for them having so much of their young lives and past versions of themselves caught on tape ..but something about it makes their now bond even more beautiful. I'm curious about what they would now say about their past behaviours, what changed and what not, how they feel about it looking back now. If the fight in the rain is any indication I feel like JK has been doing a lot of maturing and soul searching and grew up so well probably with advice from people around him. I imagine Jimin gained more self love and realizations that not all people are sharing the same pace and sometimes it's hard being open and vulnerable and authentic right from the start. They are so different yet somehow very similar and just..click and only getting better. I'm really proud of how they and all the guys protected themselves and grew together. I could talk about jikook for hours ❤

Dear Jikook Watcher,

You and me both. I love watching them together. Even the cringey stuff in their youth has a certain sweet vulnerability to it. I die of second-hand embarrassment and yet it also makes me endeared.

And just from a philosophical perspective, regardless of the subject we're watching... it's fascinating to see human beings change from what society molds them to be, to watch them make different choices as they grow up and mature, and then the absolute joy we feel when we witness them evolve into their true actualized selves.

The video you linked to... I'm not familiar with the context. It looks like Jimin had a long shoot where the concept required him to look angry and he was tired and JK was up in his face with his Vlog making jokes and he didn't want that, but JK apologized and kept filming, and Jimin couldn't stay mad. I mean, that's what I'm gleaning just from the few seconds of this clip. If I'm missing backstory, please fill me in!

But more to your larger point, I think Jimin and Jungkook's teenage environment was absolutely RIFE with stress, competition, insecurity, hormones, self-doubt, school work, work work, sexual awakenings (see Stormblessed95's amazing post about compulsory heterosexuality here), and scrutiny. Even if they signed up for it, how could a 13- and 15-year-old boy truly know the impact of having every waking moment monitored, pressured to be the perfect boyfriend material, the perfect beauty standard, the perfect performer--an "idol" to be worshipped?

To be so raw and real with us at any point was an act of courage.

No doubt there was a lot of push and pull and some hurt feelings along the way. The whole situation is a powder keg for emotional meltdowns. Fights over dumplings and bananas are actually about respect and autonomy--something teenagers have in short supply, never mind celebrities. And yet, thankfully, everyone in BTS has an inherently kind nature and they've all found their ways to relate and support and love each other. I truly believe BTS would have fallen apart by now if those boys didn't all love each other.

I'm NOT a K-pop fan (I'm not a popular music fan in general--I like random shit like Enya and Broadway musicals and 40s big bands and anime soundtracks; I am a weirdo). But as I see a bit of the K-pop fandoms on Twitter I am astounded by how cruel, shallow, and fickle that world is. The fact that BTS has consistently found ways to rise above it, spread messages of self-love and kindness and hard work, and to be such upstanding people in their own right... they deserve sincere praise. They are truly unique, and talented. I hate when people reduce them to just being popular. They are visionary.

And as I'm sure you see when you watch fetus Jikook, there's both the sense that some things were the result of tremendous effort and good character, and other things were the result of destiny.

A bit like the Jikook relationship itself.

Yours,

Roo

[aspho-bell]

Thank you so much for your reply ! This is very developped, like, I didn't ask for so much, it fills me with joy. My answer is a bit chaotic, i'm sorry, but here, my thoughts about your reply !!

So, first, I never thought Djura and Maria would even know each other, but now that you say it, i really see the dynamic. And Djura could totally have know her beforehand, i mean, the reiterpallasch we found in Cainhurst looks like it was made by the Oto or the Powder Kegs workshop ! And I just looked up, but its description in fact confirm it !

The Rifle Spear is probably inspired by the Reiterpallasch ! So maybe Djura came to Cainhurst before, and he saw the reiterpallasch, and it gave him some ideas. For what reason he already came to Cainhurst though ? Maybe he worked for them long ago ? Or maybe he studied there, under some Cainhurst engineer's mentorship ? I think it's only up to headcanon to this part.

And the relationship you give about Maria and Gratia seems very soft. Both of them helping each other during training, Maria giving a tissue so Gratia could wipe off blood over her face after a night of hunting, Gratia giving a cooking lesson because Maria can't cook anything without burning the whole kitchen... Like, it's all about girls support girls, even more when girls are gigantic descendants of somewhat vampires, even more when you're the only women in a workshop filled with crusty men.

I think I could not stress enough how much I love the barthender-who-knows-everyone's secrets trope :') and the mysterious Blood Minister being a bartender before ? I love it !! Your Matias seems fun : "he eventually felt guilty for being so shady though." Like, wonderful man, it was about time. Can't wait to learn more about him one day.

And about Laurence... Well, does Laurence have any single healthy relationship ? Does he know how to treat a person with respect and not as a mean for his goals ? I mean, he's so fucked up, that's why we all love him hfjedkzkz. I think you actually picture well how i imagine him, in the "the ends justify the means" kind of way, even if your headcanons are so grim, in true Bloodborne fashion jajenzjzj. I don't even have the right words to say how horrible he behaves with Maria, i mean, subtly pushing her to her suicide ? Because he thinks that, at least, she deserves that ? Laurence darling, you're fucking insane.

And I'm all for Maria having a crush on Vassylissa ( i love her name so much <3 ) because, we need more lesbian ships with Maria other than Mariadeline ( even though i love it ). Imagine all the unsaid things between them ! Maria thinking herself as not deserving of love after everything she did in the Fishing Hamlet, and thus staying away from Vassylissa...

Ludwig and Maria were once besties, the contrary is impossible otherwise. I mean, as you said, they're both so chivalrous ? So idealistic ? So focused on honor in battle and in almost everything ? They probably both stood out in the early times of the hunt, when most of the hunters were probably not from the upper class. Ludwig must have been so heartbroken when he learnt about her suicide, even more when he tried to help her retrieving some faith in what she was doing. ( also, ludwig x his sword is like, so much canon, thank you to bring it in )

And damn, I really love the headcanons you have for now about her relationship with Cainhurst ! Imagining a small ( not so small ) Maria fighting Crow because he bothered her friends is soo heart-warming. I can't wait for your Cainhurst family headcanons !! And Eidinghardt is quite an unusual name ? Why did you pick it ? Does it have any particuliar meaning or something ?

Hello there ! Do you have any headcanon about Lady Maria ? Like maybe her relationship with other characters than Gherman and Adeline ?

Thank you for an ask! I've posted some headcanons about her past ( x )and her habits and alike ( x ) but it was a considerable time ago! Also I have a delayed ask from my friend @heraldofcrow regarding Maria's family because the sheer amount of people I needed to cover and contexts I needed to explain crashed me shdfhsd (I will post it when I am ready Crow </3 )

I will cover more or less solid ideas here though because some headcanons I am still just bouncing around!

Maria and other Old Hunters

Like it says here, she and Henryk were the ones helping Byrgenwerth, descending from the families with close ties to ancient cultures and having a lot of knowledge under their belts (as well as personal interest)! Both of them are not very talkative outside of "important" stuff. However, every time they do speak with each other it is very agreeable, fulfilling and positive experience! They share a lot in common and understand each other's struggles and fears effortlessly!

Djura was a person she respected a lot, especially for being the fellow denier of magic using, unlike the rest of Old Hunters that enjoyed arcane weapons, Moon-granted powers, bells, etc etc. That's why Powder Kegs were "heretical"! They both only relied on their skills, only he also was a great engineer! She considered straight up joining Oto Workshop (remains of which later became Powder Kegs) but did not like what their fixation on fire was unfortunately bringing in her. She has the secret pyromancy power, you know x)

^ The fact that concept art features a Charred Hunter similar to Djura with a rapier and one of Powder Kegs weapons imitates a Cainhurst weapon makes me consider the idea that Maria and Djura knew each other even before the Hunters stuff! I will examine this idea later, but them being old friends is an appealing idea! In either case, for her Djura was like that one "cool mutual" who instantly gives you self-esteem boost if they like your post! xD Djura was yet to undergo his character arc at the point Maria's resolve as a hunter cracked after Fishing Hamlet though, so his (former) feverish hatred to the beasts made her trust him less. She already got burnt when Gehrman somewhat harshly didn't understand her faltering and didn't want to risk getting judgement from Djura, the second person she admired, too.

Gratia is a cousin that Maria never learned of, as Gratia was discarded since birth (born same kind of Pthumerian-Human hubrid as Snatchers)! It was rather lucky to still meet within Old Hunters as adults. Maria felt quite comfortable with her, coincidentally getting sense of 'older sister' figure from her that she missed after parting with Annalise! Even though Gratia and Annalise are nothing alike of course x) But a much more stronger, more bold and confident, and more tall woman is something that allowed Maria to connect with her softer side, especially when Gratia would straight up pick her up in a (too tight) embrace when she congratulated her with something, or expressed vocal wish to "protect" her!

Matias (Blood Minister from intro cutscene) used to double as a bar man at the times when alcohol was still relevant in Yharnam, so she interacted with him outside of the hunt enough! She needed a glass sometimes, okay? xD He is a curious person though and prefers to get under facades and see what people are really made of, so he abused being sober while she was drunk to ask her about her feelings on various topics and people, or pry on her secrets. She was so stoic and reclusive, he just wanted to know who was the person under the Hunter role! Very crooked of him, but at least he didn't use drunk secrets of others for evil, he is Just Like This lol. He eventually felt guilty for being so shady though. As one of the first Old Hunters who started to experience the potential drawbacks of the hunt and blood (losing legs capacity, blindness, having to amputate fingers etc), he also was one the first to get in a wheelchair. Maria was so nice and helpful to him despite him becoming "useless", he should have been nice too, this old nosy bastard.

Maria and the Healing Church

Laurence... Alright, heeeere we fucking go again with my beloved image that is a pillar for many of my headcanons:

Maria and Laurence are not blood-related (at least as far as great-grand parents go, I didn't develop centuries of family tree!), but saw each other since younger age! They were not close though, as Laurence travelled and studied abroad in his kid and teen years! Whenever he visited, it was also not more than simple exchange of news at the dinner in a group of people. Maria and her squad (Annalise, Crow and King) knew him as arrogant asshole with inflated ego, but he returned in Maria's life in Byrgenwerth era, as admittedly more charismatic and pleasant person than before.

They managed to patch up years of awkwardness and distance and became friends, especially since he got along with Gehrman quite well! ...but then he decided that HE was special, and HE could tame the holy blood when Loran and Pthumeru Ihyll failed 🙄 Maria was more by the side of Caryll, Rom and Willem on the big bad academical infighting! She argued with Laurence a lot. When he convinced Adeline that letting him surgically alter her body to produce holy blood was a good idea, Maria straight up could not handle it maturely. It is a long one to go into but Laurence already tugged some unexplainable sense of fear and hesitation in Maria. She felt like his influence somehow was everywhere (not she alone, actually) and she never could stand up against him properly, but "losing" Adeline was the very peak of the sense of helplessness. She wished she reacted more maturely and her weakness only proven Adeline that Laurence was more reasonable trustworthy (owch.....), but in either case, since then a HELL of passive aggression and coldness followed between Laurence and Maria.

....and then, they somewhat broke the ice in Research Hall arc, after Maria abandoned the hunt and could at least entrust in evolution through Eyes and Stars. They both figured they took bad turns in life and there was no point in lamenting the past, they still needed to save what could be saved. They finally had pleasant, albeit very bitter-sweet interactions after years of mutual vitriol. However, I am considering a very dark idea of Laurence seeing that Maria was bordering suic1dal moods and not only letting it happen, but even "encouraging" it in secret, as he wanted her out of the way before commanding Cainhurst massacre. No, he knew that he had her will broken and she would just let him do it, he was not scared. But he... didn't want it. He figured it was a better way to go for her as someone who still believed she could atone for her sins, rather than living to reach complete state of helplessness. He "allowed" her one last "choice" in her life.

Fucked up concept, fucked up concept, I know.

With Brador relationship was a bit strained, but they were more of friends than Maria and Laurence. At least, she was not feeling so inexplicably cornered by him with all her might as a warrior, nor Brador was trying to scare her into being hush. He believed she was smart enough to not get herself or her friends into more trouble, albeit always felt bad for her kind, honorable nature. He knew he was an opposite of her, completely drenched and even reveling in disgraceful crimes he was doing to help "smarter people" advance. But, Maria pleaded with Brador to get a word out from her to Laurence, to pay attention at the weird actions of Doctor Micolash at the Research Hall and why patients kept suffering and diving into 'Sea', and Brador listened to her. It is quite a confession from Brador to go against Laurence for someone, and Maria knows this. They'd have very deep friendship under better circumstances, I think.

Vasylissa (White Church Hunter) is another character Maria saw often! Technically, Maria replaced her as an overseer and caretaker of Research Hall in the end. Even before that, Maria appreciated this person and was always relieved to find her in Grand Cathedral praying instead of Laurence. Vasylissa at least remembered to "fear the blood" much better than everyone else in the Healing Church. Very arcane-leaning, very should-have-stayed-in-Byrgenwerth person that helped Maria to feel less alone. They exchanged everything they knew as well as had many heart-to-hearts, and Vasylissa considered themselves to be good friends.. She was one of the people who cried and blamed herself when Maria was gone. I also like to play with an idea that Maria would like to approach her romantically, but noticed someone else had eyes on her - that Black Church female Hunter who guards her! So she decided to step back.

Ludwig was also a person with whom Laurence and Healing Church stuff didn't sour the things with! Heck, the guy loved what Laurence represented more than himself, and mostly was just fixated on the hunt (and his 'Guidance', but that was a secret!)! They are both knightly and full of honour, naive and kind but ruthless in battle! I even wrote a post of headcanons of them as a pairing once ( x ), but everything said in that post still applies minus the dating bit :') They were good friends that vented and could comfort each other, they disagreed on the same Healing Church's antics, they had friendly sparrings, they kept each other in mind upon separation and stocked up things to share with each other when they'd meet next..

I think when Maria went from 'magic bad humanity good' to 'maybe there IS some hope for humanity in pursuit for Stars and Moon 🤔', Ludwig showed Holy Moonlight to her. He was a little reluctant and jealous considering it, but could not see Maria so doubtful and lost. If sharing something so intimate could've helped her to finally make sense of her conflicts, then so be it. Only.. it made things worse, because Maria saw that the violence and murder was in the plans of even the Great One that was advertised by Laurence and the others as the way to help humanity!

Maria and Cainhurst

This is the part where I unfortunately have to restrain myself, because there is so much to unpack that, like I said, I still have a separate ask to work on this!

But, Maria had sort of a friend group since childhood with Annalise (half-sister from her cheating father), Eidinghardt (Bloody Crow of Cainhurst) and Elias (King)! Her relationship with Crow were the closest of the group, as the two were like siblings! They were fighting a lot but not in a toxic way, more like the typical siblings banters! Maria additionally pinched Crow's cheek or invited him for a nice fist fight when they were kids and Crow constantly made Elias cry, or was rude towards Annalise! He was an asshole, and she was an anti-bully ranger x) Yet, whenever it subdued, they were playing together a lot and getting into trouble together. Crow was very jealous when Maria decided to leave Cainhurst, like... I would not surprised of the 'straight up clinged to her leg and dragged after her across the floor' situation fdshhfd For people that fought a lot he felt only she truly understood him, and he never quite recovered from realisation that Maria might not really felt the same, even if she did love him too.

Elias was very gentle person when he was growing up, and could only really turn to Maria to hide from judgement for "shaming" his noble family. She was there for him during both of his most hardcore conflicts with Annalise (who was and is extremely hard to earn forgiveness from), and believed in him when he decided to become a warrior too. Annalise, like I said, Maria found a comfort in, lacking a mother figure and instead seeking a woman to turn to in older sisters figures. But also, Annalise gave her chills sometimes! She never dared to lie to her or break a promise to her- and she did see what happens on example of Elias. At the same time, Annalise was so reliable, someone Maria could share her problem with and just know that Annalise will help...

____________________________

This is all for now! Obviously this is not all characters to cover; there are still Logarius, Izzy, Caryll (one more cousin, but known one), Micolash and Rom, and relatives in Cainhurst! I just wanted to answer the ask now but I am still cooking some headcanons because I figured I can't rush it and right ideas find me at their own pace :pensive: Still, thank you for letting me talk about it in detail!!

[we-are-inevitable]

for the fic title!! bc i love a long parenthetical, how about i don’t belong (and, my beloved, neither do you) from “the lakes” by taylor swift?? 🥰

okay so !! perhaps unoriginal, but: royalty au.

jack is a 'commoner,' or so everyone calls him. he's from a village about three day's time away; he came to the heart of the kingdom for fun and adventure, and thus far, he hasn't found what he's looking for- but he takes up an apprenticeship underneath a renowned artist in the city. said artist does it because he sees himself in jack. a young, scrappy boy with a bleeding heart. someone who's yearning for a life with more meaning. and jack doesn't particularly like the city, he doesn't particularly like being stagnant and stuck in one place, but he makes do.

david is a prince. he's a prince, and princes have rules. rules are not meant to be broken. he's first in line for the throne, anyway; he may be a twin, but he was born just mere minutes before sarah, and thus he's always assumed the "eldest child" responsibility. be professional. be kind. be understanding. if something goes wrong, why? shouldn't you know better? why did you not stop it? you have a kingdom to run and you haven't even been crowned yet and you're already fucking it up--

david is a powder keg about to explode. jack is the spark that sets the fire.

all because of a mural in the great hall of the palace.

it's a collaboration of sorts. the artist jack apprentices under needs help if he's going to finish it by the deadline- june fifteenth, the day of david's coronation. they start work on this massive wall on may first.

for jack, this is just a job for some really nice perks, albeit boring. and for david?

for david, this is his adventure.

he knows he's not supposed to, but after his studies, he can usually be found watching the artists work- watching this mural come to life in real time. some days, it's just jack working, though. on those days, david will stand next to him and converse, and try to chip away at the professional decorum jack has put on, because for once david is the one having fun and acting his age while someone else has the responsibility.

and the longer jack knows him, the longer he wants to help him; he's desperate for independence, jack can see, and jack understands why david would feel so stuck here.

this cultivates a... friendship, of sorts. they talk about everything under the stars, for hours and hours- or for however long david can swing to stay, as he's been getting busier and busier with the upcoming celebration, and as the days go on, he starts to crack under the pressure.

one night, jack is in his room- a guest room in the palace provided by the king and queen, seeing as jack and his mentor are providing a great service to the royal family- and one night, david knocks on his door.

they talk until sunrise. about life outside the kingdom. life in the city. rules and regulations that princes must follow. all of jack's memories from being a poor child. all of david's memories of being a lonely child. all of david's stresses and worries about becoming king in less than a month.

they talk about how david has decided he doesn't want to be king. they talk about how jack has decided he doesn't want to settle down.

and they talk about how they're going to leave this place soon, just the two of them.

the prince, just a week later, is missing, leaving nothing but a note saying that he's certain Sarah will be a lovely queen and that he'll be back, but he doesn't know when.

the prince, just a week later, is missing, but Davey Jacobs is finally learning to live life to the fullest, basking in the sunset on a cliff high above the ocean, with none other than Jack Kelly lying on his chest as their horses graze behind them.

[yespolkadotkitty]

Take What You Need

A special treat for the lovely @keeper0fthestars - a flimsy excuse to get railed into next week by Francisco Morales.

Warnings: SMUT. Porn with a flimsy nod to plot. Word count: 2300

Thanking @alwaysbethewest and @songsformonkeys​ for the beta!!

“All right! You heard the man, wheels up in thirty!” Redfly shouted across the small airfield. “Catch some sleep, eat, do whatever, but I want us all in that helo, in thirty.”

“Copy that,” Pope shouted back, heading off towards the thick bushes surrounding the hangar and aircraft. Ironhead followed, probably to try and talk some sense into him. Ironhead had always been the most sensible of you all.

In fact, it was William who had spoken up for you when Pope suggested you come along.

“She’s good with a rifle,” Ironhead said calmly. “And her Spanish is decent. Way better’n mine and Benny’s, anyways.”

Redfly - the infuriatingly traditional conservative middle-class American man - had ummed and aahed, and you knew it was because you had a vagina. 

But here you were, and you’d taken out two of Lorea’s guys from the roof with your rifle, so Redfly could suck your metaphorical dick.

The man in question loped back to the other side of the airfield, towards Pope’s informant, and started to talk to her about something.

“This is a clusterfuck of epic proportions.”

You turned at that voice. A little raspy, a little husky-edged, it sent a shiver up your spine. Always had, and probably always would.

Francisco Morales shook his head when you turned to look at him. His ballcap - dirty, soft - was pulled down low over his head. Hair the colour of milk chocolate curled out from underneath it. He met your gaze, and his own hazelnut eyes were so, so tired.

“It could’ve gone better,” you agreed, letting your eyes trail down his long, lean frame - a little soft in the middle, but you’d always liked his tummy.

Francisco - Catfish to you all, because during special ops training, he’d caught one almost the size of himself - was an enigma of a man. Soft, sometimes. Hard, sometimes.

You’d known him five years now, and during that time you’d seen him pull the trigger a foot from a man’s head without wincing, and you’d seen him comfort a three year old girl left homeless in a war zone, his voice soft, his touch gentle. The yin and yang of him fit, somehow.

Catfish scoffed. “Not sure how it could’ve gone any fucking worse.” He ripped off his cap, and your eyes were drawn to a deep cut on his cheek.

“What’s this?” You automatically reached up to touch his face. His tanned skin was rough under your fingers as you traced the edges of the healing wound. “It might scar.”

Francisco grunted. “Like that’s a concern right now.”

You grinned, dropped your hand. “It’ll be sexy. The scar, I mean.”

“You think?” He laughed without humour, wrung his cap in his hand, and you saw how drawn his starkly handsome face was, the patchy scruff around his jawline grey in places. God, had you thought about kissing that almost-beard, stroking your fingers over his bristly chin. “I wish being sexy was what worried me most. I’m fuckin’ losing my shit here. The scales are off the charts, the helo will never make it to the ocean-” he swore a stream in Spanish, and stuffed his hat back on. The frustration steamed off him in waves.

“Fish.” You braced your hands on his shoulders, looked up into his face, twisted with anger and fear. “We’ll be okay. We’ve had worse than this.”

“Yeah, but we’ve never had worse with you,” he bit off, shrugging off your touch and pacing away, shoving his cap back on, his hair curling at the edges. “Jesus fucking Christ, if anything happens to you, I’ll-”

“Fish!” You shout to be heard over the noise of the aircraft prep, the wind, the sound of Redfly and Pope’s informant arguing. “Nothing will happen to me. You saw me take out Lorea’s guys. And I saved your ass on that mission in Istanbul.”

Francisco shifted, adopting that hands-on-hips stance he always did when he was thinking. “I know.”

“Then what? I’m not a porcelain doll, Francisco.”

And you saw it. His eyes went hot when you used his full name. Hot and sort of.. Dark. Like he wanted to drag you into that hangar and bend you against the corrugated metal wall and rail you into next week.

And boy, you’d let him.

“What?” you challenged. He needed this release. Whether it was shouting at you or whether you wrestled until the fight had gone out of him, he could not fly that helo with your lives and that money at stake in such a state.

He muttered something in Spanish. Your command of the language was very good but his voice was pitched too low for you to make out the syllables.

“Oh, you wanna go?” You lifted your fists in a mock fighting stance. “You ever hit a girl, Morales?”

“There’s always a first time,” he gritted out humourlessly.

You danced around, goading him. “Maybe you’re afraid I’d kick your ass.”

Fish scoffed, and you could see the tension in his shoulders, in the line of his back. He was a loaded powder keg, seconds from a bloody explosion from the heat, the stress, the shooting. “Stop it.”

“Make me.”

You saw the moment his eyes changed - went dark again, and you turned, running for the hangar.

You heard him bark out a laugh as he pursued you, his long legs eating up the terrain. You ran flat out, reaching the hangar in under a minute, Fish hot on your heels. The minute he barrelled through the door you slammed it behind him.

“What the fuck?” he asked, confusion parading over his face - somehow even more alluring when he was dirty, tired, stressed.

You yanked him close and kissed him. It was the first time, and all the times you’d thought about kissing him, an inaurgural kiss, it was never like this. It was in your shitty home town, under some trees, or under the bleachers of the old high school, or by moonlight at the drive-in.

It took a second, and then Francisco was kissing you back, his lips fierce, hard, the kiss almost painful in its intensity. He tasted of terrible coffee and the beef jerky you’d all forced down, and you licked into his mouth, tangling your tongue with his, and the flavour of his little groan was divine.

“We don’t have long,” he whispered harshly. “What - what do you want?”

Your breath was coming in pants. He smelled of clean sweat, the outdoors, and the spring rain, and you were wetter than you’d ever been. This close to Catfish, you couldn’t cope with the well of desire, too long ignored. “You can’t fly us like this, Fish. In this state.”

His hands clenched on your hips. “What?”

“Relieve the pressure.” You slid a hand down his body, cupped him, felt his erection like steel in velvet. Your blood fired. “For us both.”

“Shit.” Francisco leaned down, rested his forehead against yours. “I’ve fucking dreamed of this. But not… not like this, like you’re a cheap fuck. You’re not. You’re… everything.”

The words shook you, and you pressed your lips to his, drinking him in, loving him, like you’d loved him nearly five years, and always been afraid to rock the boat.

Well, now the boat had run aground and it was time.

“You can show me that when we’re safely back on American soil, soldier. For now…” you yanked him close again, pressed your palm to his cock. “Take what you need. Give me what I need.”

“Fuck,” he bit off, and then he was kissing you like a starving man falling upon a banquet, all tongues and teeth and Frankie, and you pressed as close to him as you could.

“How long do we have?” you panted out.

He shot his cuffs, checked his watch. “Quarter hour.”

“Then make every minute count, Morales.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he breathed. And he got on his knees in front of you, pulling at your jeans.

Your heart leapt into your chest at the first brush of his breath on your bare legs. Frankie rolled the denim down, ghosted a kiss over your underwear.

“You would not believe, baby, how often I’ve jacked off to the thought of having you,” he whispered.

“Fish, if you don’t do something, I swear to God…”

He took off his cap, passed it to you. “Wear this for me.” After you slapped it on your head, he pulled your hand back down, thrust it into his hair. You tugged him close as he yanked your underwear down and proceeded to fucking feast on you.

You’d never experienced Frankie like this. Near feral, his tongue licking at you like you were his last meal, his favourite food, a longed-for treat. He used his hands - hands you’ve wished were on you, inside you - to spread you so he could spear his tongue inside you, nip at your clit, write his name with his tongue, whatever the fuck he was doing, it felt like Heaven. 

“Stop. Stop,” you whined, pushing at his hair. “Want to come with you inside me.”

He looked up, those cocoa eyes dark and hot and irresistible, and then he was on his feet in a hot second, and he spun you around to face the wall.

“Hold on to something, baby,” he muttered against your neck before he sank his teeth into the sensitive skin at your pulse point, the tiny hurt only making you wetter.

The sound of his belt buckle being undone and the shove of the denim down his thighs was loud to your ears.

“Please,” you gritted out, arching your back.

Frankie slid a palm down your naked butt, and you heard the growl in his voice when he said, “Sweet girl. When we get back on US soil….” And then he positioned himself and slid home in one smooth, hard thrust, and you gripped the hangar wall hard and cried out at the pleasure and the stretch. He kept going until he bottomed out, curses in English and Spanish falling from his lips in that husky baritone made for pure sin, and then as you groaned in satisfaction, he curled a hand around to your front and rubbed you in maddening circles.

“We don’t have long,” you warned, muscles already fluttering.

“Fuck. Won’t take long. You feel too good. You’re so fucking tight. How - how do you-”

“Fast and hard,” you instructed, and you felt him twitch inside you at your words, heard his moan. “I wanna feel you tomorrow, Francisco.”

“Oh fuck,” he grated out, and then he pulled almost all the way out before slamming back in. The force was just what you needed, and you cried out at the wonderful pressure, the push of him inside you, the texture and shape of him. Better, harder, larger than you had imagined.

You spread your legs as much as you could given the  denim around your calves, and Frankie fucks you hard, keeping one hand on your hip and the other at the apex of your body, strumming you expertly.

“Wish we had more fucking time,” he rasped into your hair, pressing a frantic kiss there. “Sweet girl. You feel like heaven. Always.. Knew.. you would.”

“The things I’m gonna to do you when we get home,” you shot back, and pressed your hips into him. “Oh God, more, please.”

He upped the tempo, and the sound of your bodies slapping together was obscene. His fingers circled your clit once, twice more, and you flew off that sweet cliff edge, crying out his name and burying your face in your elbow to muffle the sound.

Frankie’s hips faltered as he gave you all he had, thrusting into you at a punishing pace before his hips stuttered.

“Two minute warning!” Ironhead yelled from outside.

“I want to feel you come inside me, Fish,” you whispered over your shoulder.

“Fuck.” And he tumbled over the precipice too, hips shaking. You felt him jerk inside you, felt the hot surge of his climax, and he pressed down hard on your clit, triggering another little orgasm for you, too.

“Jesus. Fuck.” Frankie leant his forehead on your back, panting. “Christ.”

“You gotta get some more swear words, Morales,” you said, but your breath hitched too, and you wiggled your hips, making him shiver.

He pulled out, zipped up, and then took care putting your clothes in order. When he tugged you close for a kiss, you tasted yourself.

“First fucking chance I get,” Frankie rasped, his lips in your hair, “I’m gonna take my sweet time doing everything I want to you. With you.”

“Then get us over those mountains, Francisco, and I’m yours.” You nip at his bottom lip, then sprang apart when Redfly yanked open the hangar door.

“Fuck’s sake, Fish, we thought you’d gone AWOL. It’s go time.”

“Copy that,” Frankie shot back. You let him leave first, glanced down to admire his ass in those jeans. 

And you thought, with single-minded determination: We just need to get over these mountains. Then Francisco Morales would be all yours.

Redfly looked at his departing back and then turned to you, eyes narrowed. “Why are you wearing Fish’s hat?”

****

Tagging the Pedro pals: @emmy-dandiliom918​ @thirstworldproblemss @cinewhore @poenariuniverse​ @keeper0fthestars​ @scarlettvonsass​ @casually-introverted​ @knittingqueen13​ @phoenixhalliwell​ @10-96dispatcher @buckstaposition​ @agirllovespasta​ @songsformonkeys​  @gamingaquarius​ @mstgsmy​  @synystersilenceinblacknwhite​ @dornish-queen​ @maxphillipswasright @winters-buck​ @mourningbirds1​ @pascalitomorales​ @mrsparknuts​ @alldatalost​ @abuttoncalledsmalls​ @mrschiltoncat​ @auty-ren​ @heatherbel​

it’s 10.45pm my brain has failed if I left you off I apologize!!

[vvienne]

TODOBAKUDEKU FIC RECS

Curse of Baytown by surveycorpsjean

With the last of his hope, Shouto stumbles into a strange town. Be it destiny, or be it fate; his life will change forever.

two whole dicks for a half and half bitch by Ascend

Todoroki stumbles his way into a threesome, Midoriya cries into his pants, and Bakugou gets cockblocked no less than twice, but eventually, they all get laid.

Of Respite and Odyssey, Balm and Halcyon, Rapture and Godot, Lear and Pierrot by JayJEx

Aizawa and All Might’s Forever Squad of Problem Children

(8:47 AM) Midorito: @/everyone this is an official callout post for @/Discount IcyHot Patch, who is returning to musutafu tomorrow and DIDN’T EVEN TELL ANY OF US!!!!! ლ(ಠ益ಠ)ლ

Shouto groans in despair. Predictably, the group chat immediately explodes.

-or-

Todoroki returns to Musutafu after six years away and his tragic inability to keep up with all of the people in his life catches up to him in the worst, most irritating ways possible.

(Though he might at least get a boyfriend or two out of the matter. That’s a plus.)

if it was only a distraction (how come I can't stay away) by Voulezvous_79

He scrolls down and his heart stops - shit, shit, shit, no. Bad Izuku. You are over this. Completely, totally, definitely over any high school crushes that were going nowhere - because it’s the photo.

The one he surreptitiously had as his phone background for his entire first year in America. The one he cried over when he got on the plane. The one he jerked himself off to - once, okay!? It was one time, and he panic-deleted it after he came, and then cried about that, so he’s not proud, okay?

---

Or: Izuku's back in Japan, and he's definitely, totally, 100% coping with his friends' new relationship.

Biology for Assholes by fruiticle

Bakugou, an omega with Pseudo Alpha Syndrome, was content to live with his heatless, smoke-scented, absolutely-not-soft condition.

Really. He wouldn’t change a thing.

JUMP!!! by cxlmberry

Izuku grew up watching Superhero Legend, the iconic, generation-defining anime series featuring the invincible crimefighter All Might. Now, he is ready to become a professional manga author himself, to inspire thousands of people with his own series for decades to come – if only things were that simple.

Weekly Shounen Jump picked up Shouto’s series when he was only sixteen, and since then, he has become one of the most accomplished authors in the magazine. He’s a teenage prodigy. A genius. Jump’s main attraction. Sometimes the stress of it is too much.

Katsuki is talented – extremely, rudely so, and he knows it. An incredible artist and master storyteller, he’s out to become the one and only, undisputed King of Shounen Jump. Now, he only needs to get published.

A story of passions and careers, talent and hard work, second, third and fourth chances, as well as recovery and growth.

---

Alternatively, a budding manga artists AU.

Fire in the Mountains by EllaBesmirched (El_Bell)

“I’ll do it.”

Enji froze, fingers curling into a fist at his side, and didn’t turn around.

Shouto froze too, feeling his own eyes widen in shock at the words that had come out of his mouth, at the fact that he had actually stood up, followed his father out of the room, and dashed after him all just to say… he’d do it? He would do it? Him. Shouto Todoroki. He would--

Enji finally turned around and fixed Shouto with an expression so scathing, Shouto had to fight to keep his chin raised. “You’ll marry the Barbarian King.”

Shouto blinked. “Yes.”

How (Not) to Bribe a Human Sacrifice by maxisnotokay

"You want to kill me?" Katsuki asked, brows raised. He suddenly looked a little less like a king and more like a man, peering at Izuku through the moonlight. "You help me make this cure, and you kill me."

"Those are my conditions," Izuku said. He didn't break his gaze. "A deal's a deal, Kacchan, and I'm trying to be a hero."

+++

[fantasy au. midoriya literally falls from the sky and strikes up a deal with an unlikely candidate. things do not go as planned.]

Guildy Pleasures by Mysecretfanmoments

As the only son of a powerful politician, Todoroki Shouto's life is just one big boring cutscene—except when he logs on to Land of Heroes, where he plays as ShoutO, slaying foes and keeping his fellow guildmates alive. It's enough fun that it almost distracts him from the fact that he's falling for two of those guildmates. Almost. But he's got to stay in stealth mode, because Bakugou and Midoriya are mega-popular streamer duo ZeroDeku… and they're already dating each other.

Shouto has managed to keep his real identity a secret from them all this time, but when he's caught on live television watching one of their streams he ends up not only pulling aggro from the whole country, but catching the attention of ZeroDeku themselves. To his shock, they actually want to meet Shouto, the politician's son—and this time there's no avatar to hide behind.

the universe must have my back, you fell from the sky into my lap by lelex

The picture looks like it was taken in a cafe, Todoroki in a light blue sweater that even from a distance looks wildly soft, seated at a baby grand piano with his short hair effortlessly tousled. It’s one of those photos where it’s obvious Todoroki wasn’t expecting it to be taken—he’s in the middle of looking up at whoever is behind the camera, a smile small on his face but delight evident in the curve of his mouth.

He’s stupidly beautiful. Looking at him for too long makes Izuku kind of sweaty.

They both sit there staring at this one picture for almost three full minutes. In complete silence. Eventually, Kacchan sighs a little bit and tips his head backwards to rest on the couch. Staring up at the ceiling, he murmurs, “Well, shit.”

Izuku can’t stop the lightly hysterical laugh that explodes from his mouth in response.

“We’re fucked.”

*

Izuku, Katsuki, and Shouto fuck up a meet-cute, twice. But everyone wins in the end.

Cinderoki, the Sweaty Prince, and the Furious Fairy by Esselle

"I wish I could go to the royal ball for Prince Izuku," Shouto finally told the fairy.

Katsuki screwed up his face. "That's it?" Shouto nodded. "Why?"

"It seems fun."

"It's not going to be fun." Katsuki scowled. "It's going to be terrible. You have to have a better wish."

"I want that one," Shouto said.

--

Todoroki Shouto is cursed. Since he was five years old, he's been locked away from the rest of the world to keep his out of control magic a secret. He thought he could be content with his storybooks—until an invitation comes from the royal palace, inviting his family to attend a ball for Crown Prince Izuku.

Shouto wants to go; he wants to be normal; he wants to leave his cage. Most of all, he wants to know what it's like to live in a fairy tale, even if it's only for one night. Fortunately, he's about to meet one pissed off fairy named Katsuki, who's been watching Shouto his whole life and waiting to make his wish come true.

Powder Keg by Ajaxthegreat

Bakugou really, really, really didn’t want to be trapped in an elevator with Todoroki and a fireproof dildo.

Sensory Input by Esselle

"Captain," Shouto says, clearing his throat. "You put in a request?"

Midoriya stands in front of the window now, staring out at the endless expanse of stars. He turns when Shouto enters. Like Bakugou, he's dressed casually, in a simple grey shirt that stretches over his chest. His green eyes blink wide as though in surprise, before he smiles. It's sheepish and shy. In front of the window, the vastness of space flung out behind him, he's as stunning as a supernova.

"I did, right," he says. "The, um, the thermostat… seems to be, maybe—"

Bakugou cuts him off with a loud sigh. "Quit wastin' his time and tell him why he's really here."

--

Shouto is a remote crew member of a spaceship—his real body is stationed on a world far away, but his consciousness is housed in a maintenance bot on board the ship. When he manages to attract the attention of the ship's gorgeous captain and fiery first officer, it doesn't take long to discover that the bot's adjustable sensitivity levels have more enjoyable applications than repair work.

[avatarskywalker78]

Fanfic Masterpost

Now under a read more due to the growing number of fics.

even if we can’t find heaven (i’ll walk through hell with you) - Part 1 of The Shieldmaiden Saga, focusing on Steph Taylor - Eddie’s childhood best friend - as she gains powers from the particle accelerator, and soon finds out she’s not the only one, gaining new friends...and discovering that the accelerator was flawed.

to save the world (with a friend by my side) - Longfic for SyFy’s Krypton, where Adam Strange and his friend Ashley Tanner travel back in time to save Krypton. Problem is, the villain they’re after’s already arrived, Kandor’s a powder keg, there’s an extremist group making things even worse, and Adam and Ashley are about to find their different approaches are going to clash. 8/11 chapters

flufftober 2021 - A series of mostly shortfics I wrote for flufftober 2021, mainly dctv but a few Marvel and Ace Attorney ones as well.

emerald legacy - An AU spanning from Arrow’s S1 finale, where Oliver was the one who died saving Laurel, not Tommy. In the midst of dealing with Oliver’s death, plus the revelation that Thea’s his sister, Tommy knows that sooner or later the city is going to need a protector again, and decides to take up Oliver’s mantle.

of legacies and lies - Alex Thompson, Jack Thompson’s granddaughter, goes on the run after the SHIELDRA reveal, and has to deal with the fact that her entire career in SHIELD has been a lie. Meanwhile Jack and Sarah - his wife - are making sure she’s going to get a fair trial when she reaches the US.

a god’s reflection - a rewrite of an old FFN story, written from Loki’s POV after his initial imprisonment post-Avengers as he thinks about his actions, and regrets that he’ll never really have a chance to make amends because he’ll likely be imprisoned for the rest of his life.

when one door closes (another opens) - In the 22nd Century on Earth-4, Brianna Thawne takes Sara Lance up on her offer to join the Legends, and this is only the start.

now we have (the freedom to choose) - an AU of Legends’ S1 finale. Kendra isn’t the only one dealing with destiny, but Carter too - and since he’s the one who always remembers first, it’s unlikely he’s ever had much chance to be with other people like Kendra has. Featuring a more self-aware Carter and a heart to heart with Sara Lance.

you’ve always been (a part of me) - A Seg/Adam fic set 40 years after Krypton’s S2 finale, where they’ve been together almost as long - and Seg is hit with the realization that he’ll eventually outlive Adam.

speak (and i’ll listen) - a short MonWinn fic set in an AU of Supergirl S2 (the AU being that they’re together, and not Mon and Kara). Winn stresses over not being able to stop Music Meister. Mon does his best to comfort him.

to new beginnings - A Westhallen short fic written for Polyam Shpping Day #14, set in an alternate season 2 and featuring the three of them discussing New Year’s resolutions.

Cobalt Blue and The Flash - an AU series where Malcolm Thawne and Barry Allen are best friends and both get struck by lightning, becoming speedsters. Malcolm wakes up first - and this changes everything.

doubt (and the bonds of love) -  Another short MonWinn fic, set in an alternate S3 where Mon-El never left Earth. Mon-El has become distant all of a sudden and Winn is determined to find out why.

to live and rise (and hope again) - longfic about Eliana Kent, Clark and Lana’s daughter from an alternate universe, as she experiences a massive power boost, becomes a hero, and joins the DEO, while still dealing with her family’s loss and having to work with two of their counterparts.

the future (is ours) - a short Thallen fic, set in a AU where Iris is the Flash, Eobard got defeated without any casulties, and Barry and Eddie are dating - Eddie second guessing his relationship with Barry after Eobard’s manipulations.

right here (is where i’m meant to be) - A lazy morning Segdam fic set post-canon.

Cobra Kai Mini Rewrites - a series of unnconnected oneshots that will rewrite various scenes of the show that I felt didn’t work or were flat out bullshit. Currently has 18 stories.

bad boy (no more) - my collection of Mike Barnes redemption fics. Currently has 3 stories.

[bythebonefire]

knowing your partner well can potentially make writing together a lot easier. repost, do not reblog!

name: Spacy

pronouns: she/her

preference of communication: Discord once we get into a flow of plotting, but IMs are fine too

name of muse(s): lol a bunch of ‘em now. W. D. Gaster (both Undertale verse and Mafiafell verse), Grillby, Ferno (Underfell Grillby), Flambeau (Underswap Grillby), Luciano (Mobtale Grillby), Orion (Outertale Grillby), and Papyrus specifically from Mafiafell.

rp experience / how long (months / years?): I first started RPing Sailor Moon OCs based on my gal pals when I was in 5th grade so uhhh coming up on 25 years?

platforms you’ve used: AIM, Livejournal, Discord, and eventually Tumblr

best experience: Meeting two of my best friends, @abracaxfuckxyou​ and @puzzlebones​, after joining the UT fandom, and doing a two-week road trip with them along Route 66 last summer. We got lost on spooky backroads! And stayed at kitschy motels! We visited the World’s Largest Ketchup Bottle! It was a highlight of my life frankly lmao

rp pet peeves / dealbreakers:  People not having any indication of their age anywhere on their blog. I don’t need to know your exact age, but at least whether you’re 18+. Other than that, let’s see... this doesn’t happen too often, but does happen occasionally writing a character like Ferno--I’ve written with some folks in the past who even before we directly interact, seem to go into it with the expectation of a ship because he is very flirtatious. I do love ships! I love Ferno ships! But just because a character is very charismatic and charming doesn’t mean a ship between my muse and someone else’s is going to work out. 

fluff, angst or smut: I enjoy a healthy, balanced diet of all three. 😌

plots or memes: I enjoy both! I’d love to do more extended plotlines, but I think memes are a great way to build dynamics that can be fleshed out in plots. Sort of like how good filler episodes in a series develop the relationships between the characters that enriches the story around it. 

long or short replies: Both are good! I tend towards medium to longer. 

best time to write: It really varies lol, my day-to-day schedule is a joke for a lot of reasons. But I would say usually right after waking up in the morning--during my recording days I’ll usually try and bang out a post or two while I’m hydrating and warming my voice up--and late at night. 

are you like your muse(s): In some ways. I’m not as neat and tidy as Grillby for sure, though I relate a lot to the anxious tendencies he’s developed over my time writing him. I also tend to bottle things up until I am a powder keg of stress, and it is definitely not good for either of us, lol.  What’s kind of interesting to me is the feedback loop that’s come out of writing my muses? Grillby’s love of music that gradually became a part of his character wasn’t like necessarily autobiographical--music is still really important to me, but I play it up with Grillbz past the point I’d take it partly because sometimes it’s really funny to see someone so put together be just really weird and excited about something? But also because I think it emphasizes one thing I love about my version of Grillby, which is that he gives the impression of a stoic, silent gentleman, but deep down inside is an overly passionate nerd who can get so swept up in something he adores that he struggles to keep that composed image. It shows his hand as a bit of a closet romantic and a dreamer, and it’s something that endears him to me. But also (to get to the original point of this tangent), I think writing that out through Grillby has given me a greater appreciation for music, and enhanced my own love of it as a medium of art and communication.  So I guess I do see a lot of myself in my muses sometimes, but I feel like writing my muses in some ways has altered the way I see the world and appreciate things too, and that’s just kinda neat. 

tagged by: Stole from @megalobonia​ 

tagging: Take it, nerd