#he got himself involved in the only quest that didn't mention him

[ryukolighter]

Titan's curse was legit SO FUN and like... Their quest group isn't talked about enough??? It was so cool and fun 😭

[struggling-jpg]

HSR 2.6 Quest Thoughts (Spoilers)

(Partially another Dan Heng love post -Resident Dan Heng Enjoyer /hj)

I liked how compact the cast and overall plot is! Definitely easier to follow the events and new characters, which was only a whole 2 of them, which I personally appreciated.

Rappa's backstory adding a tragic context surrounding her behavior and personality hit me harder than I anticipated. I wasn't sure what I was expecting but her being tied so closely to Dr. Primitive didn't even cross my mind prior, but it makes so much sense in hindsight. I was moved by her. I already liked her a lot before but the quest added to that as well. Also Master Shura was interesting to me. He was the "person in a questionable organization that actually questioned the morals of the organization" but the way he was handled intrigued me. Rather than a straightforward immoral -> moral type mindset, he concludes that morality is "a hypocritical and superficial concept" before killing Umbra Headmistress. He's better than the others there but he came across as more tragic in the end, which I find to be an approach that has me thinking about it after. Overall it's cool to see how connected Rappa is to the situation.

Also Mr. Reca is fun! Him being a Memokeeper and showing off the range of abilities/themes for those in the Garden of Recollection make me look forward to any potential Memokeeper characters in the future.

Having a quest go more into depth of Boothill was also nice! Seeing our Galaxy Rangers be expanded on a bit more is something I'm always happy to see. Hearing Nick mentioned by name made me lose it LOL, watch me break down in tears the moment his daughter is too. The sequence of him "falling" into the association's ideals made me more aware of how invested I am in his identity and goals. He made himself a living memorial of everyone he'd lost and the thought of him losing that unsettled me, so that section really got me the more I was made to think about it.

I appreciated how Robin explicitely notes that she still didn't have a "better answer" to the debate about the bird. Rather than having some answer at the end of the Penacony quest, she still has to think about it, and considering the complexities of that topic, I appreciate that it's treated as such by the characters.

Overall, the themes about evolution, ambition, identity, and individuality feel very fitting with Penacony and HSR as a whole. In a universe where there are billions of tragedies across the galaxies, where many factions and beliefs are born, clash, and either carry on or fade away, where dramas play out under the spotlight or in the darkest recesses of space, this is just another small anecdote in history's tapestry, and yet, to those involved, it's important. And in the end, that matters.

With that out of the way, now look at these pictures of Dan Heng (most of them of him saying "bana")

(Look at his small smile!!!)

(You go give the bare minimum, King!!!)

I play in the Japanese dub, so it's amusing to hear Ito Kent's take of a usually monotone Dan Heng being forced to say bana, bana in that serious monotone ToT

[skzhua]

We Going For the Win

MASTERLIST

Pairing: Bang Chan x Female!Reader

Genre: Zombie Apocalypse!AU, fluff, bit of angst. (The Last of Us vibes)

Word Count: 9,982

Warnings: Violence, swearing, mentions of sex/death/killing, drinking. (Not proofread yet!)

Summary: While being in quest of finding your childhood friend you have lost contact with ever since the start of the infection, your ex fling and ex smuggling partner involves you in a difficult situation. New friends and difficulties are waiting for you.

A/N: Might do a part 2 or leave it as it is... I don't know yet.

"Here." the man simply said while dropping the bag on the table in front of you.

He gestured at his men to open the door behind you as a way to inform you this little meeting was over. However, you didn't budge.

Instead, you took the bag to see the content of it, and frowned. "The deal was 10 silvers and a pack of cigarettes."

"No, no. The deal was 10 silvers and a pack of cigarette if you did the job correctly."

"Which I did."

He started to laugh before taking another shot of whiskey. "I asked you to steal the radio and get SKZ's location from them. You only got the radio. Therefore, you only get the cigarettes."

"You're kidding, right?"

He shrugged, fiddling around with his glass. Not answering your question, he poured himself another drink. Before he could bring it to his lips, you took his glass harshly from his grasp and threw it accross the room.

"What the fuck, woman!" he shouted angrily.

"You fucking asked me an impossible task, plus bringing you a most likely broken radio from the restricted area, made me infiltrate a fucking government base to steal infos and you're thanking me with fucking cigarettes." You slamed the bag in front of him, giving him a glare. "The deal included 10 silvers. I want them."

"Sweetheart, you know it doesn't work like this." he chuckled with a smug smile on his face.

You shut your eyes in disgust of the infamous nickname he gave you. "Don't fuck with me, give me the silvers."

He got up from his seat and signaled to his men to shut the door. The already stinky room was filled by the alcohol's odor, making you want to puke. How could this man drink so many shots without being dead already?

He paused a moment, looking at the ground, before he spoke again. "Do you want to find your little friend or not?"

"What does this have to do with this?"

"Y/N, I know you want the silvers to go across the country to find your friend. That is if he isn't infected yet, of course. What I'm saying is, there is a reason I'm not giving you those silvers."

"That's what this is about? About you not losing your best dealer?"

He laughed, again. "At least you know you're the best. Not only that but we have helped each other so much in the last six years. You're like a daughter to me, I'd hate to see something bad happen to you."

You smiled sarcastically. "And yet, you've sent me away to die thousands of times just so I could do the job for you."

"Because you are the best I have." he pointed out again.

You were getting tired of this. Frankly, you just wanted to get the damn silvers and go to bed. However, you knew the man and he wouldn't let you have what you wanted so easily. With that in mind, you seemed to have only but one option to get out of this.

"Alright then. I guess I'm not leaving today." you sighed, standing up from your chair. "I do want one thing if I don't get the money." He stepped closer with a curious look on his face. "I want to know if Changbin ever sends something on this radio."

He smiled. "Done deal." You nodded before heading towards the door. "And Y/N?"

You stopped on your tracks, rolling your eyes. "What?"

"I better see you tomorrow morning, I have another job for you."

Ignoring him, you resumed your way to the exit. Once outside, the sirens couldn't be any louder. In all of places, you had to be at the worst safe haven of the country where only dealers, smugglers, thiefs and many others lived. You were grateful your uncle was renowned enough for the other rebellious groups to leave you alone, but that also meant you had to do all of his work for him. If not, you were dead meat for sure.

When you arrived at your half torn down apartment, you jumped as soon as you walked in, as you were welcomed by an unannounced man sitting on your couch.

"Yeonjun, what the fuck?" you shouted, closing the door behind you. "I told you to not fucking burst into my place randomly like that."

"I know, but I kind of had nowhere else to go."

This was enough said for you to know he got in trouble, again. "Who was it this time? Beomgyu? Taehyun?" you asked while serving yourself a beer, offering one to your former partner.

He took the bottle and drank from it before talking. "Soobin."

You frowned. "I thought he was off to the west zone."

"So we thought, but turns out he had an encounter with SKZ, and he's been taken hostage. We tried to free him, but fucking stupid Beomgyu crashed into a pole and now all of them are taken away."

"And why are you here?"

He rolled his eyes. "To ask you for your help, obviously."

"No, I know that. But why are you not with them?"

"I jumped out of the car before it crashed. Hid until they all left and came here as soon as it was clear."

You shook your head in disbelief. "No matter how much I'm trying to cut you off from my life, you're still going to involve me in your stupid schemes."

"You're quite literally the best fighter, sniper, liar and also the prettiest I know."

You almost choked on your drink from his words. "We're not going to fuck again, Yeonjun. Stop with the flirting."

He held his hands up. "It was just a joke, relax. But for real, I really need your help."

"I don't deal with SKZ."

"They're just another gang, what's the big deal?"

"They're not feared by the whole country for no reason. I support their whole rebellion shit, but they're taking it a bit far."

SKZ were an anonymous group of rebels. When more people were starting to get infected, the government put the country in war mode. They established curfews, safe zones, duties, everything they could have control on anything that you could think of. As the years passed, they started to like this kind of power, meaning they did close to no research on a cure. Groups against the new regime started to form, but the most well-known of them was SKZ. Apparently, they were formed in the south part of the country, the area with the most infected. They ravaged headquarters, gathered information about the virus so their team could study them in order to find a cure. They had great intentions, but anyone on their way would be one of their victims. And that now included your ex-fling and smuggling partner's own gang.

"Y/N, please."

"No, I saved your butt enough times." You walked to your room and he followed you behind, still bombarding you with 'help me', 'this one time', 'please'... "I said no!" you grunted, closing the door on his face.

You dropped on your bed, sore from your morning task. As you were already starting to doze off, a creek from your door did not allow you to go to sleep just yet.

"Yeonjun, go away." you mumbled, eyes still closed.

The man didn't listen and sat next to your laid down body on the bed. "What if I say I can help you find Changbin?"

Your eyes shot open and you stared at Yeonjun. "Don't." you warned.

"Y/N, I swear I'm not kidding. I know where he is."

"How? You barely go outside of the limits."

"Just... Trust me on this one." he spoke softly. "Look, we've had our ups and downs and I understand how unreliable I am to you. There is one thing that I can assure you, and that is I never would mess with you with this. I know how much it means to you."

He took your hand in his and gave you one last pleading look. You were hesitant. You didn't know if you could trust him, but at this point, who could you really trust? Plus, Yeonjun has always been around. Even if he was a pain in the ass, he might be the only recurrent person in your life other than your uncle and his deals.

"If I learn this is a whole fucking joke-"

"I swear it's not!"

"But if it is... you owe me 1000 silvers, a car and your dead body." you smiled.

"So, you're going to help me?" he stared at you in shock.

"Yeah, sure. As if I have anything better to do."

As you were making your way up the ladder, you couldn't ignore the undistinguished noises Yeonjun was making as he was following you closely.

"Can you shut up?" you half-whispered.

"I didn't know you were thinking of leaving during the night. There is a fucking curfew, Y/N. You know what that means? Agents everywhere and going against the law!" he whispered back quite aggressively. "Also, how the fuck do you know the way to the other side from the sewers?"

"Okay, first of all, a curfew means no one's outside. Less chances of getting spotted. Second of all, we've gone against the law so many times, I don't get why you think it's a problem now. And third of all." you stopped climbing and stared down at him. "I've been outside the limits a few times. Now, are we done? Can we just move and get there before it's morning?"

Yeonjun's eyes went wide as he shook his head in yes. "My bad..."

Satisfied, you continued to climb up. When you finally reached the lid of the manhole, you pushed it up carefully, staying alert in case there would be agents on duty close by. Once you made sure it was clear, you pushed the lid so you could get out. You helped out Yeonjun and you both pushed the lid back into its place.

"Alright, so are you sure they went to District 9?" you whispered.

"For the nth time, yes." he said with annoyance.

"How are you so sure?"

"Dude, I heard them loud and clear."

"They might have said this to trick you?"

"Y/N, focus!"

You tried to remember the quickest way to the fences. Agents were everywhere, and what bothered you the most was Yeonjun not being the most careful, as he kept questioning you on why you knew how to get out.

Finally, you reached a part of the fences that surrounded the city. Yeonjun gasped in amazement, much to your discouragement. Sighing, you headed towards the underground tunner that some kids had dug a few days ago.

"Go first."

Nodding, Yeonjun followed your orders. Once he was on the other side, you copied his action and, soon enough, you both had crossed the limits. Once you got to the other side, you could already feel how different it was from the build closed community. The air was much heavier and actual forms of life were rare. There was already an infected who spotted you, who signaled to his other infect friend there was a meal for them.

"Shit." you muttered.

The monster was already running in your direction, and fast. You took a bar of metal that was randomly (and conveniently) lying at your feet, and you ran to it before swinging your weapon to his head, ripping it off its body. The second infected was next to head toward you and you instinctively pierced the bar through it, making it drop on the ground. When you turned back to check on Yeonjun, he could only stare at you with wide eyes and his breath unsteady.

"Now what?" he gulped.

"Follow me." you said, running towards an old building, visibly abandoned.

Only, it was just that. Visibly abandoned. As soon as you turned the corner, you were met with a bunch of men, four of them, masks hiding the bottom half of their faces while pointing guns at you.

"Fuck." Yeonjun said in a low tone while holding his hands up in the air.

"We were waiting for you." one of the men spoke.

"Oh, so them saying they would be in District 9 wasn't a trap?" you sarcastically asked Yeonjun, pettiness overflowing.

"I was convinced they didn't see me." he said in defense.

"We didn't." the man talked again. "But we knew you were there. Now, mind to follow us?"

"Okay, so now y'all are being polite?" Yeonjun scoffed and you kicked his leg. "Fine, let's follow them bluntly, I guess."

The men led you inside the building, holding onto your arms with guns still pointing at you. This was the exact reason you wanted nothing to do with SKZ, they could catch anyone and they were not afraid to use the weapons they had.

After walking endlessly in a hallway, you reached an elevator. You were surprised it was still functional, as most of the things in the infected zones were destroyed. Once the doors shut, one of the men pushed the button to the basement. Of course, it was the basement. You would've thought they'd be more original with where they kept their hostages.

"Are we meeting your big boss?" you asked in a joking tone.

"You're joining your friends." one responded.

When the doors opened, you didn't waste a second to take the gun from the man who was grabbing your arm, twisting it so he would let go. Hitting him on the head, he fell onto the ground. Meanwhile, Yeonjun copied you and also managed to disarm two other men. As for the last one, he held his gun to you.

"Don't waste my time, give me the gun." you said boringly.

He glanced at his friends on the ground, who were massaging their heads from the hits, and they all seemed to be in agreement to just let you be. They knew the others would take care of the both of you, anyway. You took the gun and didn't hesitate to give him a good punch in the face, making him fall next to his friends.

"Let's go." you nodded your head to Yeonjun.

As he was walking by your side, he started rambling again. "That, right there, was fucking awesome! There was a reason why I came to you for help. If it was someone else, I'm sure I'd probably be-"

"Dead? Yeah, well, you'll be if you don't shut up." you whispered loudly.

By the end of the hallway, you could see a large closed door that was seemingly locked. Pretty convinced it was where they detained the others, you made your way to it.

"I guess that's it." you mumbled.

When you reached it, you searched in your bag to see if you had anything that could help you open the door. Noticing you were short in terms of tools, you figured Yeonjun brought something that might be useful.

"Got something?" you asked, but when there was no response, you looked around and Yeonjun was nowhere to be found. "Jun?" you called out.

Just then you were suddenly tackled onto the ground. You met eyes with a young man with freckles.

"You don't look like an SKZ member to me. Who are you?" he asked, restraining you as you tried to push him off.

"Doesn't matter." you managed to breathe out.

"It does to us."

"I guess you'll have to find out another day."

Kicking him in his lower abdomen, you freed yourself and grabbed your knife from you bag. When you were about to throw it to the boy, a hand grabbed your arm, stopping your motion. The stranger twisted your wrist, loosening your grip on the knife. He took it from you and inspected it for a bit.

"Felix, go see if Minho, Jeongin, Hyunjin and Seungmin are fine." he said, his voice low.

The freckled boy, now up onto his feet, nodded and headed to the elevator you were previously coming down from.

"I didn't expect Yeonjun to bring a friend." he said, now talking to you.

He led you to the door you were trying to open not even 2 minutes ago. In contrary of what you thought, it was a simple empty room with a single lamp as its source of light. He threw you to the ground and closed the door behind him. He sighed loudly before walking to you, crouching down to be at your level.

"Now, as my friend asked. Who are you?" You only stared at him, not a sound slipping from your mouth. "Do you know why we took your friends?" No answer. "Why are you here?"

"For no reason, just to enjoy a different environment I guess, just like y'all do."

He didn't expect you to answer this time. "Looks like you don't know much about us, sweetheart."

You cringed at the nickname. Hearing it from someone other than your uncle was odd. Even just hearing it from your uncle was uncomfortable.

"Maybe I don't. Honestly, I don't give a fuck about who you are." You crossed your arms and gave him a bored look.

"Maybe you don't. Still, I think a little introduction can be helpful. I'm Christopher Bang, leader of SKZ." Unfazed, you were still staring at him. "And you are?"

"Tired and annoyed."

He chuckled at your answer. "I like you." He stood up and started to walk back and forth in the room. "I shall contimue then. SKZ is a group of rebels, as people call us, whose purpose is to take down the government's new policy in order to restore some sort of purpose among the population. We're also trying to find a cure for the infection and we, as you might have seen, have many people against us. Your friends were trying to get to our secret base to steal a drug we use during our experiments. They wanted to sell it to make profit off of it."

"Sounds like them." you huffed.

He smiled at your comment. "We've dealt with TXT before, but you're a new one. I've never seen you, I believe."

"Like I said, I literally don't give a fuck about y'all. I just do my thing on my side."

"Then, why are you here?"

"Ask Yeonjun."

Sighing at your lack of engagement in the conversation, he stopped walking around to turn his body to face you. "You took out half of my squad back in the elevator, I want to know who I'm dealing with."

Half? All this time, you thought SZK had hundreds of members around the country. There were eight of them? This new information was surprising, to say the least.

"Sweetheart?" he called out since you were not answering him.

"How-"

You were interrupted when the door opened. When your gaze shifted towards the door to see who had joined, your met eyes with the person you least expected to see. For a moment, you felt as if time had stopped as you exchanged looks.

"Bin?" you breathed out, your heart pounding.

There stood, alive and well, Changbin. "Holy fuck! What are you doing here?" he exclaimed, running to hold you into his arms.

His embrace was warm and felt like home. After so many years, you felt at ease and tears were streaming down your face.

"Where the fuck were you? I searched for you everywhere." you cried out.

"I'm sorry, baby. I'm here now, it's all good."

When you finally let go of him, he turned to Chris, who was clearly confused on what was happening. "Care to explain, Changbin?"

"She's her. She's Y/N."

Holding the ice pack to his head, Minho was mumbling some curses, still sore from your attacks.

"I'm sorry." you said shyly and he nodded his head in acknowledgement.

"So, Y/N." Chris started. "Can we do this interrogation again, please?"

You had moved to a small office, Minho tagging along. With knowing that Changbin was there, you felt more relaxed. However, it didn't stop you from being on your guard. Changbin might be a friend you've been looking for in the past 6 years, but him being part of SKZ changed things a little. You couldn't fully trust those men.

"Sure."

"Good. Who are you?"

"I'm Y/N. Been pretty much alone since everything started. I was a neighbour of Changbin and we grew up together. He was my closest friend. I've been trying to find him ever since the walls have been put up." you said, keeping it honest, but short.

"What I'm getting from this is that you're against the government as well?" he asked and you nodded. "Why were you with TXT?"

"I'm only here because Yeonjun quite literally begged me to help him get his friends. I didn't ask questions, I just wanted the job done."

"There was something in exchange?"

You paused, hesitantly, but nodded. "He said he knew where Changbin was."

From your answer, he got up and walked out of the room, leaving you and Minho alone. You smiled awkwardly at the man, who gave you a glare, still pissed at your previous encounter.

Outside, Chris had joined Changbin and Felix to talk. He didn't know what to do with you, and something was stopping from either releasing you, or finishing you off.

"Changbin." he called out and the man immediately focused his attention on his leader. "You know her. So, what's her deal?"

"I can't know for sure, I haven't seen her in years. She is colder than before, for sure. I doubt she is lying, though, but I can't be certain."

"Okay. What do I do with her? She might be lying and has tried to steal something from us."

"Honestly, Chan, I'd give her the benefit of the doubt." Changbin said.

With that, he went back to the office, encountering a rather uncomfortable silence between you and Minho. He coughed a bit before sitting back in front of you.

"Do you have any reason we should believe you?" Chan asked, continuing the interrogation.

"I'm repeating myself, but I quite don't care about what y'all do, and I am not fond of the authorities either."

"A reason we shouldn't believe you?"

"There are many, but one is that you don't know me."

"Your relationship with Yeonjun?"

"He used to work with me... and sleep with me."

"Have you crossed roads with any infected?"

"Two on our way here. I killed both."

"Did you get bitten?"

"Do you see a mark?

"No..." he trailed off.

This kept going for while, and Chan was strarting to be very precise with his questions, as he was wondering why you were on your own and why were you looking so desperately for Changbin. Until then, you were short with your responses, much to Chan's dislike. After a while, Minho, who had been observing the interraction this whole time, stepped forward to take the seat next to you.

Interrupting the conversation, he grunted in annoyance. "Chan, she seems fine to me. Can you just let her go? We're wasting time here."

"No wait." Chan paused, inspecting your traits. "I have some questions, concerning your skills."

"My skills?" you said, confused. "I think you saw them."

"I just know you knocked out my members, killed two infected, do some stupid deals in the city and fucked Yeonjun." he summed up while giving you a blank stare.

"Fucking is a skill?" you scoffed.

"I'm just repeating what you said, sweetheart. Now, skills?"

"I fight, I kill, I spy, I steal, I negociate and I lie." you listed and your last point seemed to grab Chan's attention. "Also, I don't owe shit to anyone."

"Have you thought of joining a group?"

"I told you, I'm on my own."

"But do you like it this way?"

You thought for a moment. Did you? "Yes."

Chan laughed and shook his head. "You're not so much of a good liar there, sweetheart."

You rolled your eyes. "Let's say I do fine alone but being alone can be rough at times."

Minho whined loudly once more. Not only did he have to listen to this whole pointless conversation, but he had to suffer from the tension happening between you and Chris, and he had to see his leader ask a hundred questions before getting to the point. It was very unlikely him, who would usually not bother talk and kill those who are on his path. With you, however, it seemed more like a game. It might be a fun one when in it, but Minho was done observing.

"He's asking you to join SKZ." Minho spilled out, going straight to the point.

"Thank you, Minho." Chan said, giving his friend a death stare.

Thinking about it, being on SKZ's good sad wasn't too bad of an idea. They are great fighters and took care of their business quickly, from what you've heard. Nonetheless, you still had your friends in mind, who remained detained at the moment. If joining the infamous rebels meant you could get them out, you might be able to help them out, after all.

"What do I have in exchange?" you asked, which took Chan by surprise.

"You would join us?"

You shrugged. "Depends on the offer."

"Of course, you'd ask something in return." Chan shook his head. "What do you want?"

"Release my friends. And give Yeonjun 1k silvers, he needs it. Also, I want to choose my own weapons and I still want to be able to do my uncle's deals. Last thing, I want to talk with Changbin, alone."

Chan looked at you curiously. You didn't ask anything for yourself, except talking with Changbin. For a world nearing its end, you were surprisingly selfless.

"Deal."

Yeonjun came to visit you a few days after. He thanked you a thousand times for what you had done for him but you weren't so happy with how things turned out. While you were close to punching Chan in the face, your friend had been nothing but grateful to the man.

"He really wanted to kill us, you know?"

You rolled your eyes while sharpening the knife you were gifted earlier that day. "I'm literally the one who saved you, but sure. Thank Chan for being such a good person."

Yeonjun frowned, hearing your tone. "You don't sound too fond of him."

"I asked for a moment with Changbin, and he still hasn't allowed me to stay in a room alone with him. It's almost been a week."

"You tend to be impatient-"

"I've waited for six years, Jun." you cut him off, pointing the knife at him. "I am patient, but I have limits."

He lifted his hands up in defense and sighed as you went back to sharpening. The building was so quiet, it was almost sickening. While you thought there would be more action in the group, there was almost nothing to do. Seungmin and Minho were in charge of looking into a cure and the remaining of them were mostly simply guarding the place. As for Chan, he and Changbin were nowhere to be seen.

"Do you know why he joined them?" Yeonjun asked.

"That's exactly what I'm wondering myself."

Just then, Felix walked in the room and took the seat next to Yeonjun, waving at you two. You nodded your head at him and focused back on the blade. Twirling it around, you sighed in boredom.

"Doing some training?" Felix asked.

"No, there's just nothing to do in this shithole." you deadpanned at him. "Weren't you on the lookout?"

"Changbin took over."

You huffed in disbelief. "It's as if Chris is doing everything in his power for me to not meet him."

"He will let you two talk eventually." he assured. "He's still on his guard with you, that's all."

"Sure." you spat out as you got up on your feet.

"What are you doing?" Yeonjun frowned, Felix having the same expression.

"I'm going to talk with Chan." you declared, walking towards the exit.

The boys didn't seem opposed to your idea, so they let you leave, although Felix did look more concerned. You had no idea where Chan could be. The building was so huge, you were barely starting familiarize yourself with the ground level. You soon spotted Hyunjin from afar and didn't waste a moment to run to him.

"Hey, Y/N." he smiled, his eyes almost closing.

"Do you know where Chan is?"

Startled by your lack of courtesy, he nodded his head nonetheless as he pointed to a door nearby.

"Thanks." you said as you left him there.

"He's with Seungmin, just saying." he yelled out but you ignored him.

You stormed into the room and the two men at your sudden entrance. While Seungmin got up with his gun pointing at you, Chan reached his hand out to him as a way to tell him to lower his weapon. You stared at him, unimpressed. He motioned for Seungmin to leave the two of you alone. As the door closed, he invited you to sit with him.

"What is it?"

You looked at him, baffled. "That's it? What is it? I know you know."

He nodded. "Changbin, isn't it?"

"Obviously..."

He shrugged. "What about him?"

"Stop messing with me, Chris." you warned, getting up to lean on the desk to get closer to him.

Sighing heavily, his shoulders dropped in defeat. Without adding another word, he stood up and gestured for you to follow him. You were skeptical of how easy it had been to convince him but didn't say anything about it. If you were just about to get what you wanted, there was no way you'd complain.

Chan made you follow for a good ten minutes. Turning left and right, going up and down the stairs... you were almost scared of getting lost. It was all worth it in the end, though. As soon as he opened the door to the rooftop, you spotted Changbin who wasn't doing much other than playing around with his gun.

"Bin." you called out and the man in question turned around, seemingly taken aback from your presence.

You mouthed a small "thank you" to Chris who answered with a quick nod before leaving, closing the door behind him. You let out a sigh of relief and went to go hug your old friend. As Changbin was still on duty, he returned the embrace coldly as he was watching around the building.

"What are you doing here? I thought Yeonjun was visiting you today." he asked.

"Fuck Yeonjun, I've seen enough of his face. What about you? I've nearly said a word to you since I arrived."

He chuckled, visibly still fond of you. "You haven't changed."

You shrugged, fully knowing you weren't the same person he once knew. "I guess I kept some of my old mannerisms."

He nodded slowly before looking to the view of the city you had. A moment of silence felt both good and torturous. He was right there, just next to you, and you weren't talking still.

"So? How did you get here?" you said, breaking the ice.

"Wow, going straight to the point." he laughed. "I don't know. After the evacuation, I was pretty much on my own. I still have no idea where my family is, if I'm being honest. About five years ago, I had a quibble with Han. It was over some food or whatever, I don't remember. Anyway, I beat him but it was cold that night so he offered to go back to his hideout. And that's when I met Chris. The guy saved our lives, I've never met someone quite like him."

You hummed as he finished. You were as much worried as he was about finding family and such. And that's what he was to you, family. The exact reason why you've been wanting to find him for so long. He was your comfort place, your home. Someone who had been there for you far more than your actual family.

"No." he spoke again. "He actually reminds me of you at times."

Seeing the knowing smile on his face, you cleared your throat as you grew uncomfortable. "So you thought of me..."

"Obviously. You were my closest friend."

Nostalgia hitting you right in the face, you smiled sadly to yourself. "These were the good days."

"They were. How did you even survive on your own, anyway? Six years alone, it must have been rough."

You could hear the worry in his voice which you almost took as an insult. You are small and lanky for sure, but you have always managed to do everything by yourself and with success.

"I was with my uncle for the first year before I ran away. I believe I was alone for about two years, which wasn't that hard. I made contacts everywhere and it became pretty handy. Then my uncle found me and we've been having this thing going on ever since. I do his deals and he pays me." you explained.

Changbin scoffed. "He's still around?"

You nodded. "After my dad got infected, he was pretty much all I had left. Except for you, who I have tried to contact for the past couple of years." you said, sending him a glare.

He held his hands up in defense. "It's not my fault SKZ is a secret organization. I would've put the whole team in danger if I answered your radio signals."

You crossed your arms on your chest. "A little sign of life would've been nice, though."

"Please, Y/N. I'm sorry, okay?"

A loud explosion nearby cut the conversation short. Looking to where it came from, you saw Felix and Jeongin hiding behind a wall while a crowd of infected people ran towards them. They had seemingly threw a bomb at them but it was clearly uneffective. Instinctively, you took Changbin's gun and went ahead with shooting the monsters who were the closest to the boys. Jeongin took a moment to spot you before nodding his head as a sign of thank you. While you continued to shoot, he grabbed Felix and rushed him to a building further away.

"Changbin, Y/N!" Yeonjun's voice said as it came from the door Chris had previously gone through. "The building's not safe anymore, come with me."

You rushed to follow him and walked down the stairs to get to a level where you could jump to the building beside. Changbin took his gun back and made sure to beat any infected with whom you'd come upon.

"Are Seungmin and Minho alright with the cure? And Chris-"

"They're all fine, now's not the time." Yeonjun shut you up.

A couple of levels later, you left the staircase to go find a window wide enough to go through. As it seemed to be a quieter place, you allowed yourself to calm down and take a look around. It resembled an old office room where workers would type all day about whatever.

"I never came here." Changbin informed.

"We didn't necessarily need this space anyway." Chris said as he walked in the room, limping slightly. "I've gotten everyone out, it's just us now."

"Where are the others?" you asked.

Chris let out a grunt from the pain his leg was causing but still took the time to answer you. "I don't know but we have a meeting point. We'll find each other again eventually. It is a shame, though, this place has been the longest settlement we've had so far."

"Oh, fuck." Yeonjun cursed before running to the doors, shutting them closed. "We don't have much time and the way to the next building isn't that simple."

"What do you mean?"

Changbin pointed to the hole in the wall. "It leads to a balcony. The plank of wood there can be our bridge."

You went ahead and helped him get the piece of wood, trying your best to get it out as soon as possible. Meanwhile, Yeonjun was trying his best to keep the door closed but as more infected came, it became harder. Chris wanted to help but his leg wasn't letting him. Helplessly, he watched Yeonjun struggle and you and Changbin doing everything to get out fast.

In his mind, he was already dead. He thought about Minho for a moment, hoping he had taught the younger man everything to take over his place as leader. He truly hoped he did. Because he wasn't going to make it. He would only slow everyone down.

"Man, come here." Changbin yelled at him.

"You'll have to go without me." he declared, feeling defeated.

This caught your attention and you went back to Chris. Seeing him so vulnerable, your heart sank. If he was like Changbin had described him, it would be a waste for him to die. With a determined walk, you went to his side and put his arm around your neck to be his support.

"What are you doing?"

"Saving your ass." you rolled your eyes before looking at Yeonjun. "Jun, we can go now."

Your friend's face was fully red, a result of his entire strength used to keep away the monsters. Even if he wanted to, he wasn't going to have the energy to join you and leave. And one glance at each other was everything it took for you to understand that.

"You've been great, Jun." you smiled sadly, not even feeling the single tear that left your eye.

He gave you a small smirk, the best he could give you given the circumstances.

With a heavy heart, you grabbed tightly onto Chris and dragged him all the way to the hole in the wall, and then to the improvised bridge you and Changbin made. The latter was already on the other side but he crossed back to give you a hand with Chan. You sat the man down so he could slide instead of walk. Once safely arrived, you hurried to join them and throw the plank down, preventing the zombie-like creatures to follow you.

Out of breath, the three of you dropped on the floor. You couldn't believe it, you had just lost Yeonjun. Sure, he wasn't your favourite person on Earth but he had never left your side for years. In a way, he was your safe space. An annoying one for sure but it hurt nonetheless. And without saying a thing, you let one more tear drop from your eye while being totally unaware of Chan's gaze on you.

Normally, you would have left the neighborhood entirely. But because Christopher was having an issue with his right leg, this was not an option. Staying at the highest floor of the building next to the old SKZ headquarters, you were pleasantly surprised by the arrangement of the space. Someone had stayed there for a bit but left their bedding as well as their canned food and magazines. Maybe this person died but it didn't matter to you at that moment. You were just grateful to have access to such a luxury.

You all had a long day and deserved a rest, and Chan needed it the most. You had bickered beforehand about who was going to stay awake in case of anything but you inevitably won the argument.

With the light provided by the lamp in the middle of the small room, you read out loud the words written on the pages. Boring was one way to describe the texts but it was better than nothing.

"-the release of the movie had been much awaited by fans from all around the world. At its first screening in theaters-"

"What movie?" Chris cut you off.

"Avatar 2."

He chuckled. "It was a big thing, wasn't it?"

"Movie theaters..." Changbin said dreamily. "Will we ever be able to have this kind if experience again?"

You could only roll your eyes. "This is mothing compared to our movie nights."

"Gosh, I forgot about those!"

Chan frowned. "You two were pretty close, yeah?"

Changbin grinned. "My whole childhood was with her."

"At its first screening in theaters, many complained about-"

"Let's do something else." Chan cut you off, snatching the magazine out of your hands.

"What else do you suggest?" you sighed, knowing there wasn't much to do.

"We can chat a bit, learn about each other."

Changbin shook his head. "We already know each other."

"I don't know her, and you might not be aware of some things about her too."

"Fine. Y/N, how's your uncle doing?" he asked, not expecting much of it.

"Head of the bounty group in the city. He's enjoying power and abusing people but at least he gives me some money from time to time." you answered.

"Let me guess, when you do the job for him."

You nodded and that pretty much shut the whole conversation. Well, for the two of you. Chris' mind was going through a whirlwind of questions to ask. He was fascinated by your ability to remain calm and unfazed but it surely meant you had gone through something that made you this way. He wanted to know what happened. He wanted to dig into your mind to find the troubled girl. He wanted to help her.

"Your parents died, no? How did you deal with that?"

Your jaw clenched and you noticed Changbin was ready to throw some fists. Surprisingly, you weren't mad that he dared to mention your parents. In some way, you had beeb waiting for an opportunity to think of them. Ever since they died, you didn't let yourself take a moment for them.

"I coped the best way I could. I mainly tried to forget about it but I miss them still, you know? And my uncle has always been an ass so it didn't help much that he was still alive, let's say. He's family but I would've rather not if I'm being honest."

Chan chuckled. "He seems like one hell of a persona."

"Believe me, he is."

"It reminds me of my own parents."

You frowned, intrigued. "Are they..?"

"Dead, yes. My sister too. I don't know where my brother is but he most likely didn't make it. I miss them too but I made my own little family now. And I won't lose them."

Your gaze softened at his words. Scary is definitely a good word to describe Chris but deep down, he was a simple guy wanting to do good to protect his friends.

"You're part of it now, you know?"

You cleared your throat, uncertain on how to react. "Right... Uhm, it's getting late. You two can sleep, I'll be on the lookout."

Changbin took the gun from you before you could stand up, sending you a look that said plenty to you. He was going to watch first. You let him do and looked at his back while he went to sit next to the closed door.

"I get why you took Bin with you." you said in a low tone to Chris while settling down on the small blanket next to him.

He laid on the mattress himself as he replied. "Why?"

"He's built like a bodyguard, mentally and physically."

"He is, but he was so vulnerable when I met him. I was in a similar headspace and with Han being the anxious guy he is, we were a unique trio."

You didn't expect him to open up like this about the past, especially not the beginnings of SKZ. The organization might be small, as you know now, but the power they hold is something. Knowing the slightest information about them could ruin their doings. But since you were a member, you guessed it didn't matter now.

"We had a different name back then, 3Racha. We thought we were clever but when the other guys joined, it wasn't a good fit anymore."

You laughed. "Good call on changing the name. Why SKZ, though?"

"Stray Kids, a good representation of us I think. We're wandering around with a purpose but, in the end, we're all children still."

You liked that way of thinking. You were about to ask more in terms of the formation of the group but Chris' grunt took you off guard. Wincing more as he wiggles around more, you sat up and leaned towards his body to check where the pain was coming from. From the way he was holding onto his leg, you could tell this was the issue.

"Can I take a look?"

While panting heavily, he nodded in a hurry as if he was begging you to make the pain go away. Carefully, you pulled the blanket off him and went ahead with rolling his pants up to above his knee. That part of his body had clearly gone through a slight fracture.

"Gosh, what the hell did you do?" you mumbled more to yourself than to him.

"I was pushed down the stairs by an infected, no bites though."

You started to massage his knee a bit but the wince he let out was enough to make you stop. Instead, you ripped a piece of your shirt, one long enough so you could wrap it around his leg.

"I don't know if this will help for sure but it will keep it stable for a bit. The more you move, the more it'll hurt and worsen." you explain was tying it all up.

Chris watched you in admiration. There was something about you that he hadn't seen before, softness. There was worry and care in your touch.

"Thank you."

You gave him a small smile. "We don't want our leader to suffer now, do we?"

"Suffering is part of the equation, Y/N. The sacrifices I make are for the others."

"For tonight, it might be good for you to feel at peace. We don't know what will happen tomorrow."

You said this as if this had not been the case for the last six years. Every day was an adventure with risks. However, now that the team no longer had a safe space, it was much more dangerous to be out in the forbidden zones.

"Sleep well, Y/N." Chan finally spoke up, laying down again.

"You too."

It took two weeks for Chris to be able to walk in some way. In that time, your trio grew to have a routine. You and Changbin would switch places every night for the lookout but he was most often out to get the food and such. That left you and Chan alone together for the majority of the time. You didn't mind, Chris was fun when he wanted to be.

You grew closer which made you both glad. You didn't feel like you were walking on eggshells every time you were around him anymore. Instead, you felt safe. He had the trick with words so he could tell you anything in the wisest way possible. That, or he was flirting.

Maybe it was due to his lack of action in the love department, but he would make flirty comments nonstop.

One time, Changbin left to see if he could get a hold of some medicine for Chan's leg. The moment he left, Chris was at it again.

"Now that he's gone, that leaves us alone again." he had said with an eyebrow raised.

This had to stop, now that you were on the move again. The sole focus had to be finding the other boys, and only Chris knew where to find them.

On the run again, you left your little temporary hideout that morning with only a couple of belongings with yourselves such as food and weapons. You were far away from the city now, leaving you wondering where the hell Chris had planned to go.

"Are we there yet?" you asked with a whine on purpose.

"No, I've told you." he answered calmly.

His patience was impressive but you were testing his limits. "How long do we have still?"

"More than expected if you continue complaining like this."

Changbin held back a laugh. For him, seeing the new dynamic his friends had was entertaining. The growth from being distant to joking around all the time was the last thing he would've expected from the two of you.

A couple of miles later, you settled down in an abandoned convenience store to take a small break. To your luck, some snacks were still intact as well as some beverages. This brought back memories from when you would demand sodas from your father and he would repeatedly tell you how bad it was for your health. Let's say it didn't matter anymore. Food was food.

"Look! They got ramen." Chris said, bringing a box full of them.

"Jackpot." you cheered, taking one pack for yourself.

"If only we have boiling water." Changbin pointed out but Chris coming from the back of the store with a boiler shut him off real quick. "Nevermind."

"It almost feels like we're robbing someone's safe place, this store has everything."

Chris shrugged. "We're not staying for long, just to refill our stomachs. We'll continue after."

Your eyes widened. "You mean we won't sleep?"

"Not tonight, we slept plenty last week. What, did you want to cuddle with me?" he winked at you.

"As if." you scoffed.

Changbin, feeling slightly uncomfortable by the tension, started to get the food ready. In the meantime, you and Chan kept an eye outside just in case. In no time, the three of you were on the ground, slurping on your noodles loudly. This might had been the first good meal you had in a long time. You really took instant noodles for granted back when you had easy access to it.

"Are you done?" Chris asked as he finished his bowl.

You and Changbin hurried to finish and you were back to walking again, not forgetting to pack a couple of items from the store.

It felt like you had been advancing for eternity without getting much closer. You were mostly silent, that didn't help. You were growing more and more bored by the minute and, visibly, both boys felt the same.

"Truth or dare?" you suddenly spoke, startling the guys.

"Uh, Y/N?" Changbin said, confused.

"Might as well make the most of this trip." you shrugged. "Truth or dare?"

Chan was the first to answer. "Truth."

"Do you really think we'll find a cure?"

He gave you a look, as if to tell you that you were being weird. "I think so, but it won't be a thing done by the snap of my fingers. Bin?"

"Dare."

"Hum the hapoy birthday song."

"Boring. Y/N?"

"Truth."

Changbin smirked at you, a sign he was uo to no good with his question. "Who's the most handsome in SKZ?"

You cleared your throat, keeping your eyes in front of you. From the side, you noticed Chan looking at you as he expected your answer more excitedly than he should.

"Uh, do I have to say?"

"Yes." both men answered.

You breathed out loudly and stopped on your tracks to look at them both. "You're all good-looking in your own ways but... uh... Chan is pretty nice to look at." you mumbled quickly before walking again.

Chan's smirk crept on his face before he jogged to catch up with your speed. Meanwhile, Changbin proudly tapped his own shoulder to congratulate himself.

"What did you say? I couldn't hear properly." Chris questioned, though you knew he had heard it perfectly.

"Don't make me repeat it."

"I'm pretty nice to look at? This might be the best compliment I have ever received." he snorted in a sarcastic way, earning a glare from you. "If it can help your case, you're pretty cute too, you know?"

If you could control it, you wouldn't blush. Never would you accept a compliment from Chris, even less after you were forced to give him one.

"Let's go back to walking in silence, shall we?" you suggested, ignoring the man completely. "Changbin, can I walk with you?"

He shrugged. "Nah, I'm good in my bubble."

You wanted to rip his head off at this instant but refrained yourself from doing so. Evidently, you had no choice but to continue to trip with Chan next to you.

"Ignoring people is rude."

"I'm not ignoring you." you defended, although it couldn't be any more false.

"It's not such a good look on you, baby."

Your eyes went wide immediately. In the spur of the moment, you shoved him to the side and fastened your speed of walk. You weren't even mad at the nickname. In fact, you kind of liked how bold Chris was. Anywho, you had no time to flirt, even less with the SKZ leader. Trying to recollect yourself, you focused on your breathing to being it back to a normal pace.

Only for Chan to show up again.

"It was a joke, I'm sorry."

"Uhm." you hummed, still not acknowledging him.

"Y/N..."

"It's fine, don't worry."

Feeling defeated, he didn't push it further. So you continued to walk, only hearing the wind and the sounds from your footsteps.

The warehouse was most likely a place they had previously chosen as a base. The equipment was still functional and tons of weapons had been hidden in a safe place under the floor of the basement. Heavy barbed wire all around on top of high fences, you wondered why they even left this place to begin with.

"Not discreet enough." Minho answered your question, which you had seemingly said outloud. "With all the heavy security mesures here, we are easily spotted by enemies. Sure, it's safer but we prefer places where we can work hidden from anyone."

You were glad the whole group made it to the safe meeting point. Jisung immediately went about taking care of Chan's injury while everyone gathered to figure out what to do next.

"We can always travel to the east part of the country?" Hyunjin suggested.

Seungmin, however, disapproved. "With an injured leader and a newbie on the team, we might want to stay close to the city."

"There's always TXT's hiding place." Jeongin shrugged.

It pinched inside to hear that group. You missed Yeonjun, more than you would have imagined.

"It's too small for you all." you argued.

"Yeah, I need the equipment for the research." Minho added.

"We'll stay here." Chan announced as he came back with Jisung. "We are almost done with the formula, we need a couple more weeks and it should be ready to test. I doubt we'll have issues until then."

"I added traps all around the base while we were waiting for the threesome people, we should be safe." Jisung precised before slumping down on a couch.

"Threesome people?" Chris repeated in a mumble.

"Yeah, like how Changbin was surely going to sleep with Y/N and Y/N and Chris keep eye-fucking each other nonstop."

"We got the point, thanks Jisung." Jeongin stopped him, which you were grateful for.

"She's like a sister to me, that'd be so wrong." Changbin continued.

You sent him a glare but he ignored it. "No one's slept or will sleep with anyone."

"Hmm, you'd be surprised." Hyunjin argued.

"I don't want the details."

Chan clapped his hands together, shutting the conversation. "Can we get back to work?"

Everybody went to their position: Felix and Jeongin on the lookout on the roof, Changbin at the entrance, Jisung and Hyunjin in training, Minho and Seungmin on the cure...

You were left alone with Chris in his new office. With a radio at hand, you were trying to catch any signals of new research found about the virus of potential visits from enemies that you could prepare for. It wasn't that exciting other than hearing people talk.

"Y/N L/N... works for... reward of..." you heard while tuning in the radio.

You had completely forgotten about your uncle, even more the load of work you still had to execute for him. In a moment of panic, you stood uo and paced around the room, looking for your stuff.

"Woah, Y/N." Chris said, standing up as well.

"I have to go back." you announced, breath unsteady.

"What?"

"My uncle, he's gonna kill me if I don't finish his deals."

He frowned. He had tried to understand why you were so insistent on continuing to work for that guy. From his point of view, nothing beneficial for you. You would receive much less than what you deserve, get treated like shit and live in a shitty torn down apartment.

"You don't have to-"

"You don't understand." you interrupted him. "That man is the reason why I'm still alive. I did all of his work and he allowed me to get by in exchange. I let him down, he can ruin my name. He has contacts, I know he will kot hesitate to-"

"You don't have to." Chan repeated. "You're not there anymore, you're not trapped. Look, I don't know what happened with the two of you but I think he might have manipulated you. Telling you that you owe him for what he did for you? You don't owe him anything, he's the one who owes you. You do all of his dirty work for a few silvers and do it all again the next day. And what if he ruins your name? You can't be found with us. Well, your chances are low let's say. You're safe."

You hadn't noticed he had taken your hands in reassurance until you felt his thumbs rubbing against your skin. This might had been the first time someone had touched you like this, so intimately. As much as it was a foreign sensation, you felt as if there was nothing else but you and him. As if a bubnle had created around you. As tears dropped from your eyes, you took in what he just said. For years, you believed you had no choice but to give back to your uncle for lpoking after you, when in reality, he had never done anything but use you. Chan was right.

You let out a chuckle. "In a way, you saved me. By recruiting me."

"In a way."

You stepped forward, getting closer to him. So close that you could smell him. He smelled fresh and new, nothing like someone who spent years being a rebel. Looking up to stare back at him, his gaze had moved down to your lips. So you looked at his lips too and, slowly, you moved closer to each other until you kissed.

It was nothing like you had experienced before. There wasn't just lust and want in the kiss, there was anger, sadness, relief.... It wasn't a clear mix but it felt good.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to seem to take advantage of the situation or-"

You shushed him with a small peck. "You're not, I swear. Look, I don't do great at relationship stuff but-"

It was his turn to cut you off as he let out a laugh. "There is no pressure."

For a moment, you could only smile and stare at one another. This was simple, easy. You loved it, actually.

"... vaccine in development..." the radip glitched, grabbing both your attention. "... no cure found... coming from yeast... mores tests..."

Chan took a deep breath. "I think the guys are going to like that information."

"What do you mean?"

His smile grew bigger. "We know the source of it now. If the guys can combine the source with the developped molecule, we might find a way to prevent it from evolving."

"So..?" you asked again, still not fully understanding.

"We're near the end of it all, Y/N."

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[minzart]

His trusted collector

Pantalone x reader

childhood friends, gender neutral reader, debt collector reader, no warnings worth mentioning yet, found in my drafts and got the energy to finish this part 2! Still have the notes for part 3 so maybe it would one day see the light

Also on Ao3

(1) (2) His best investment

He thinks of you, and how you became friends

He watches you go, your back straight, head held high, such a contrast to the child he met years ago. A swell of pride finds itself in his chest, you were one of his precious investments, and what an investment you are, he will admit that he didn't expect you to still be with him for so long, but you surprised him as you always did.

Pantalone thinks back to your talk, you were exhausted, that much was a given, dark circles clear as day in your eyes, yet you were so energetic still, he envies that part of you a little, not that he would let you know of course, pride is a funny thing after all, nor that he missed your voice, such a small detail but it's true, it was your strongest asset, you molded it to what needed to be accomplished, fear, excitement, happiness, pity… that and your strength, it's been a while since he saw you work, but he knows, you are alive after all, and your quests are delivered almost flawlessly.

"Shit" he muttered to himself, small legs trembling from the cold, even with the Sun at its peak it didn't bring any warmth to the street, and to the boy with shabby garments it meant more suffering, not that it was anything new. What was unusual was his irritation, you were proving to be a pain in his ass to trick.

Plan 3 had failed, and 1 to 2 proved to be a waste of his time, since you didn't even recognize him, annoying, incredibly annoying, an annoying bug he's trying to catch in an intricate web that you were proving to be not worth the trouble for, the rumors he heard about you were being put to test every single time he laid eyes on you, good fighter, pff, you weren't even a good runner to begin with.

But, the little boy took a sharp breath, he needed allies, now more than ever, since one of his schemes is proving to be coming back to bite his ass, he needed a "friend", a strong friend, to be able to live another day if those brutes caught him desprepared. He knew that if he got caught once then all respect he had built to himself in the small amounts of talks and promises he made to other weak minded fools would be blown to the winds and become more trouble than he was capable of dealing alone.

That's why he needed a brute, strength, a temporary allie even, just for one day, but he hopes to gain your favor for more time however drastic times need drastic methods, he was not above begging… for now at least, one day he won't ever beg again and that will be the day he can finally get back to every single stupid bastard that even dared to treat him like garbage.

“Please just this time!” he throws himself in his knees, blocking your path “it's not a trick I need your help! Please!”

You huf, equilibrating the boxes you were carrying again “can't you see I’m busy?! Move!”

The hagged boy grabs your leg “Only if you promise to come with me and help!”

“stop that you're gonna make me break those and I don't have money to repay that old man!”

“I'm not letting go”

“yes you are” you shake your leg, the boy doesn't budge “it's your problem that you got involved with a prick”

“I gave you an apple!”

“I knew you were gonna bring this back- see that's why I didn't accept your generous offer to begin with-”

“you are my only friend please!”

“we are what?!” you stop, huge eyes locking with his and for a moment, the little boy cheeks burn pink, then he smiles bright, sweating bullets.

“exactly! We are friends! Aren't we? And Friends… help each other!” he cringes at the word, he want an ally, not a friend stupt kid brain slip of though, gluping he weakly hoped you would still agree with his bold assumptions without much fuss.

“since when?” you tilt your head to the side, puzzled expression matching his, internally he screams in despair.

“since… the… apple?”

“since the apple”

“yup”

“... how…?” you put your boxes down, crossing your arms.

“... friends… always hang out? I have been hanging out with you what do you mean?”

“bugging me isn't hang out”

“isn't it tho?” he let's go of you leg now that your attention was all on him, getting up bit never letting you out of sight he starts to bluff “don't your friends annoy you too? Everybody knows it's a love language-”

“I don't have friends” the archons smiled at him today, it seems, blessed be the insufferable fate.

“yes you do” he points at himself “welcome to the friendship distribution sistem we are like cats”

“that's bullshit-”

“no eyes!” a harsh new voice joins the echoing alley, he recognizes this brat, and you do too.

“shit” he turns around but two new boys block the path, he is stuck.

“you picked a fight” you grab him by his collar “with the richest prick in this town?!”

“It was an accident”

“was it?” he sees a hand appear in your shoulder, a cold smile gracing the lips of the most irritating older boy he has ever had the displeasure of interacting “ one hands hardly are that deep in someone pocket when it's about good intentions”

The boy tugs a lock of you hair behind your ear “is this your friend?”

You lock eyes with him, there's fear there, he knew, you just got a new gig, carring boxes full of spoiled fruits to the local orphanage that the merchants pay you two coins worth of labor, cheap and drastically underpaid and yest it was your first job, if you picked a fight with this boy, in his behalf, you would never see the color of money again, maybe not even the day.

It was a gamble, his life alone or dragging someone with him, a sliver of chance to getting out alive if he was good at faking a beg for your life, but then… then if you ever survived whatever happened to you today, you would never forgive him, he knew, he felt time stop, a decision must be made and things would change.

In the streets sticking together was as worse as being alone, but a companion even if for a brief moment could save one's life. He took a breath, lungs full of new fresh air for what he assumed would be the last time, and invested in you.

“no”

The older boy shoved you aside “good, less messy this way” and started to corner him.

The two other took position, grabbing his hands and shoving him in the ground “now be quiet”

He didn't even heard your steps getting further away as a boot meet his head, over and over and over.

It felt like days, kicks and punches and spit, blood didn't even had a taste anymore in his mouth, maybe he didn't even had tooth anymore. But finally it stoped, he was thrown in the ground, he could hear shouts, there was someone besides him, vision turvy, head sleepy, he almost didn't recognize the rich boy in the ground, passed out, a loud clang of metal hitting the ground made him try to look forward, the only thing he remembers before the black, was yours overused shoes.

When he awakes, he feels awful, head troubling, and the bumps aren't helping… bumps? Oh, yeah he can't feel the ground… he can't feel the ground? But he sure sees it passing by fast, then he feels an abrupt curve, someone is panting hard, it isn't him, he's sure, his lugs hurt. Then he finally looks to his side, and realizes, you are there.

Carrying him and running as fast as you could, to were he doesn't know nor care, but you are warm, very comfortable, so comfortable he could sleep.

The second time his eyes open, he could hear the rain, drops getting in the broken window of the house he doesn't recognize, there's a blanket in him, bandages clumsily put around his bruises, bloody water in a bow next to his feet, someone had cleaned him, and then you, curled around a tinny beaten down pillow by his other side.

That day, he thinks he finally understood what friendship was, and by the end of the week, rumors of a murder surrounded the city, the victim? A poor rich boy that was lost in a alley, playing with his friends. Pantalone couldn't be more happy that you were as smart as you were strong.

Back to the present, the baker chuckles to himself, what a desperate little boy he was, someday he still doesn't understand why you came back for him that day, sure what you have now is all consequence of that one act but still, you couldn't know that in the future that weak little boy would become such a powerful man. You must have pitied him, or his speech of friendship had worked, either way you did save his life, and builded the base for his empire, he couldn't have been more lucky.

Countless crimes committed, countless nights spent in each other's company, and yet he still feels you at only his arms length. Strictly professional even after years, your best and worse trait, after years of partnership, he still has little to no idea how your mind works. And it frustrates him, because he can easily command you and you will obey, no questions asked, kill, rob, treated, but then he asks for a match of mahjong and you… how long has it been since you both had anything to talk about that wasn't work anyway?

Has he become only a boss to you now? A small realization breaks him, work wasn't news to you both, in truth you both endorsed each other workaholic tendencies, it wasn't the first time he has noticed it, you reported he gave you another, you came from a job he sent you in another, he goes to interrogate, you guard the door, it's an old tale now, a song and dance you both knew to heart.

“I missed you”, you had said, he hadn't expected it, not by a mile, it was a slip of his tongue that greeting, and yet you answered in a way so raw it floored him at the moment. These memories he though were long buried still felt like yesterday, you little hands firming him in your back, the pain he felt that day a mere ghost to your firm hand in his, you name rolling out of your mouth, eyes locked in his as the world presented his first contract “that's my name, and I accept your friendship”

Friendship… at the time a good title, but now… he took the pen you were playing with mere moments ago, your hand treating it like a blade, passing from finger to finger, graciously, like nothing was a challenge, he writes with it instead from now on, not before drinking the rest of the tea left behind in the cup you poured for yourself during your long report, droplets still slowly falling down from were you lips touched it, and now his too.

[ohnomyhooves]

Thoughts on the headcannons that doffy is colorblind and that’s part of why his fashion sense is Like That and that corazon is so unbalanced bcos he suffered a traumatic brain injury in the same event where doffy got an arrow in his eye and cora was only normal kid levels of klutzy before that and got much worse after

Firstly I'm so sorry if it took me ages to reply, I didn't get notified of this in my inbox at all!🥹

Also, I do like both of those theories– in my opinion there is definitely something about his eyes that Doffy is deliberately hiding, whether a natural 'flaw' or an injury.

On Doffy's eyes;

I think the arrow to the eye was quite clear, it's hard to imagine he could get away from something like that completely unscathed. The only question though if this is the case is why he was wearing glasses before any of that happened. My guess is either:

- he had some kind of eye defect from birth, something that he possibly saw as this huge flaw for a high and mighty Celestial Dragon. Perhaps colour blindness from birth, or heterochromia, or partial blindness etc.

- this is self-indulgent and unnecessarily cute (sue me!) but I also like to think that maybe he was just attached to the glasses themselves as an item, the way small kids get overly attached to things and just don't let them go for a long phase I.e a favourite piece of clothing they insist on wearing everywhere or an impractical accessory.

In either case, I can see that after his injury he started wearing glasses all the time for a totally different reason; to hide an injury that was now a bigger flaw than anything else because it was definite proof of weakness. Whatever he's hiding behind those glasses I refuse to believe he's not touchy and secretive about it. I think the HC that Doflamingo actually has perfectly normal eyes under there and is just an Extra Bitch is hilarious!! BUT considering that he got to keep them even at Impel Down, and I believe the wiki says that Tsuru got him a new pair before he was tossed in jail, they must be pretty important to him/ the Marines who arrested him for that little while his eyes were bare probably saw something that they knew Doflamingo would get Touchy and Dangerous about so they wanted to cover it right back up and pretend they hadn't seen anything.

BUT I'M GOING ON A TANGENT! To answer your actual question, I've never considered that his sense of fashion is so atrocious because he could be colourblind. Like, I just thought it was atrocious because his personality involves being the centre of attention all the time– sitting on the fcking table at warlord meetings, crowning himself King of Dressrosa and throwing massive celebrations in his honour, his behaviour at Marineford– but now that you mention it I like that possibility! I would have to look up how people with colourblindness perceive colours, I think, to get deeper into it; for example, if he doesn't perceive his horrid feather coat as being pink the way other people see it, what colour does it look like to him, what aesthetic exactly is he going for? Doflamingo would 100% not care if other people's visual senses were assaulted in his quest to look good to himself so that's fascinating.

On Cora's clumsiness;

I totally REFUSE to believe he was exaggerating this or playing it up for the sake of his cover. His accidents are too inconveniently timed for that to be the case, like when it got him in trouble when he was stealing the Op Op Fruit...(ouch😭)

He says he's always been clumsy since birth but his klutzness is simply next level, so it really makes sense that it's the result of some traumatic injury. If it was simply a childhood trait I think it would get better with time, not significantly worse; AND, I know we didn't see much of him as a child, but there wasn't any time child Rosi was depicted as being that clumsy. I believe the only time he ever showed clumsiness was when he tripped and fell into a treasure chest one time(?) in one of the very first scenes of their family before they moved out of Marie Jois, but that's like. On a totally believable level for a child. His clumsiness is such an integral element of his character as an adult that I think they would've highlighted it in his younger self.

So! Yes, I agree with that headcanon ;-; poor Rosi...

Thank you for submitting such a fun ask! I do enjoy yapping about them XD

[raphaelesbian]

Hi! About your Favorite Villain post- I love thinking about the possibilities within the vague history we’re presented about the clans and how the hate of their forefathers became Shredders and Splinter’s. And not only that, but how Tang Shen figures into this version of the story.

We don’t know how long the whole love triangle has been going on (though we’re led to assume it’s been years), but we know Tang Shen was with Oroku Saki at some point before leaving him (and when Saki tried to convince her to “take him back”, he tells her he’s changed, so read into that what you will) and that she didn’t fit in as much with all the clan stuff.

I think, depending on how long it had been between the time of her breakup with Saki and getting together with Yoshi/becoming pregnant with Miwa, there could have been a point where Saki might wonder if Miwa could potentially be his daughter instead of Yoshi’s, but I also think his complete willingness to take in Tang Shen and Miwa despite her being Yoshi’s daughter isn’t really OOC considering Shredder’s penchant for taking in strays (Tigerclaw, Xever, Hattori Tatsu, etc) and his own mirrored history of being “adopted”

There’s also the long game thing you mentioned which is so fun to think about. Because that makes him offering to go with Tang Shen to NY a lie. A false offer to get her to leave Yoshi before trapping her in Japan anyway to fulfill his quest to avenge and rebuild the Foot

Though she’s still a fairly passive voice in the story, she actually has wants and opinions that she tells to Yoshi and Saki. Again, she doesn’t have much backstory beyond them, but her character lives in my brainnnnn

Yesss you totally get it!! There's literally so many options, so many ways it could've played out... I can't ever even pick a real "headcanon" bc multiple possibilities are equally intriguing to me 😂

There ARE some interesting implications around the "I'm a different man than the one you once knew" line, aren't there? I of course completely agree that Shen dated Saki prior to Yoshi—THAT at least I do believe is canon, though I see people interpret otherwise—but why did they split up? It's possible it just didn't work out, or she fell for Yoshi and ended it, and Saki is just choosing to believe that it was something he could fix. But... hmmmm.

Like, okay, assuming my interpretation of the timeline is correct, she was ALREADY with Yoshi when he learned of his heritage. And obv we don't know, but I feel like Saki was not hot-tempered prior to that situation. We know that Yoshi WAS, and though I certainly think Saki had a competitive/jealous streak, I imagine him as relatively even-headed. Perhaps he had to be, to balance out Yoshi. He just seems, in Tale of the Yokai and when he's not having a Joker Moment as Shredder, like a quieter guy.

All that to say, I wouldn't think he was aggressive with Shen or anything. But perhaps he was overly jealous/protective, in a way that made Shen feel stifled? Or maybe he was TOO traditional/entrenched in the clan, even moreso than Yoshi, and she couldn't take it? He was pushier than Yoshi in trying to get her involved in clan stuff? I have no idea, but 👀

Oooo, I honestly never even thought about the potential of Saki actually believing Miwa was his! You're so right though, like we have no idea how long it was between her dating Saki and her dating Yoshi, nor how long she was with Yoshi when she got pregnant. Perhaps, even if he didn't actually think Miwa was biologically his, he convinced himself of it anyways. He is kind of known for gaslighting himself with his own lies... XD I do completely agree that, either way, I don't think it's OOC for him to genuinely consider Miwa his own, even if they aren't related at all. Despite his.... complicated feeling around his adoption lmao.

Which, honestly, I hadn't really thought about his penchant for taking in strays, but like, when you put it like that... Idk, it's interesting, isn't it? His bio family all killed, and then HE kills his entire adoptive family... It's not unreasonable that he would try and grasp for others, like trying to fill the empty role that his family would've taken, if that makes sense. Not that he necessarily sees them AS family, but that he has this longing for community.

His offer to Shen being a lie is ALSO a great point that I didn't consider!!! Depending on how open he planned to be with her about what he had done, maybe he thought convincing her to leave Yoshi would make her less likely to mourn Yoshi's death with the rest of the clan. Or maybe he would've been willing to go to NY with her and abandon the new Foot clan once the Hamato were exterminated, because he cared more about getting rid of the Hamato than he actually did the Foot, but it didn't work out. Idk... His intentions are, as always, an enigma (and I love it).

I LOVE all of these thoughts fsdhghkdsghl ❤️❤️❤️❤️ you're right, we don't see much of Shen (tragically) but she DID have real character motivations, and I love that for her. And mourn the fact she didn't get to do much with it. Like, how fucking sad is her story, really? Did she go to college? Have career aspirations? She wanted to go to New York; had she always dreamed of seeing the Met, or seeing a Broadway musical? Did she want to travel? She never even got to see Miwa grow up! She tells him "You must decide. This is no life for Miwa" about the clan, and says "I can take care of myself. I always have." I feel like she was on the verge of leaving Yoshi, maybe not breaking up but setting out to do what SHE wanted to do. And she never got the chance. Her life had barely even started, it's so tragic. God I wish we got more of her.

[bonefall]

did you have anything planned for snowtuft? or any of the other mentioned dark forest cats w/o a backstory that were kinda placed there (ie rushtooth, houndleap etc)

Until they get backstories of their own in main content and novellas and such, I am planning on peppering them into various points in time with different degrees of severity for their crimes.

Snowtuft I'm planning something pretty dark for; he killed kittens during the Crusade era. While on a raid in Chelford, he slaughtered a family and the only surviving kitten was stolen and brought back to ShadowClan.

He hadn't technically broken the code, as the Crusades were based on the very idea that outsiders don't get equal protection, but it was so horrible and so unforgivable that Snowtuft lived the rest of his life as a pariah. His Clanmates didn't want to look at him.

His cruelty made them really sit with what the Crusades meant, and what they were even trying to accomplish.

Snow lived and died in intense shame, and didn't even stick around for his trial. He marched himself through the Meadow of Young Stars and into the Place of No Stars. He's actually a generally petty, kind of meek gossip girl kind of dude.

Silly man with a past so intense it causes an awkward silence whenever it comes up

For Houndleap, I'm thinking he was early Skyfall Era. Not even part of SkyClan or its decline, he was just super involved in a halfclan romance. Several of them. Actually he was Appledusk x 3. He had six mates.

He got caught of course but honestly that was impressive. 16 kittens btw.

Rushtooth embarassed a leader after Ripplestar's Rot and generally disrespected a ton of the lesser commandments, enough to add up. He's just kind of a jerk and StarClan felt he wasn't worthy of Silverpelt.

Batear murdered the cat who killed his best friend. Hunted the guy down and shredded him in cold blood. That friend was Fenneldust, who wasn't going to just let Batsy go to hell without her.

Shredtail lost a mate and kits to a hog, and in his quest for revenge, used a clanmate as live bait. If he hadn't gone Captain Ahab on the boar that took his family, he would have been fondly remembered a pioneering a ton of hog-hunting techniques ThunderClan still uses.

[skaruresonic]

Inb4 someone asks me if I'm going to go full-on George Lucas Syndrome in editing in a SXSG reference in Broken Wings when Shadow & FW have their one-on-one:

"Well that would involve SXSG actually adding something to Shadow that we didn't already know to be worth mentioning." :P

Seriously tho, it's sad to see how me the stupid fic writer on Tumblr and A03 was willing to do different ideas with Shadow that DIDN'T involve reiterating his past like it's going out of style...

I hate saying it because it sounds ungrateful - "how DARE ST give us MORE game!" - but they could have just rereleased Gens for Switch and none of us would have been any wiser. Nobody would have known if they didn't drop a Shadow campaign. They really didn't need to go to the trouble, because SxS Gens

A.) doesn't do a whole lot to catch newcomers up to speed on subject matter that took three or four entire games to cover; Shadow's past is complex and multifaceted. It can't be as easily summarized as "Sonic vs. Eggman" (note I'm not denying the nuance of that example, just using it for for comparison's sake)

and B.) doesn't say anything new regarding Shadow's character. He's still described as a "warrior" throughout, as if it was ever in question to begin with. He has no need to embark on a quest to empower himself if he embraces his powers from the outset.

The references and allusions depend too much on the player knowing previous events to allow for a newcomer to fully grasp the emotional resonance behind them.

The only "new" things the game says on the state of character relationships/lore/worldbuilding are either acanonical (hi, Omega), nonsensical (hi, Black Doom), or bits of fluff (hi, Maria).

There's no real character development to be found in repeating "haha Shadow I'mma possess u" / "no u won't, fuck u" several times in a row.

And like, I know somebody's gonna be in my inbox or screenshotting my post like "omg u idiot, how could you forget the scene where Shadow's anger almost got the better of him and Maria talked him down?"

Yeah. No. Still not character development. Amy knocking some sense into Shadow through the power of kind words was not necessarily character development, either; Shadow taking the steps to correct the evil he'd participated in once he realized was.

Likewise, Maria reminding Shadow of his better nature does not inherently character development make if protecting people was what he was doing anyway.

[iustitians]

[RECALIBRATE] How frequently does your muse evaluate their own ways of thinking? Have they little self-insight/feel set in their minds for better or worse, or are they constantly questioning their own outlook? To the point of self-doubt, even?

Thought, learning and intellect headcanon asks for muses | no longer accepting

---

Oh god. I started casually answering this and then as I got further I had to open a Google Doc to keep notes, because the more I think about it the more I realize that Neuvillette is such a mixture of someone who is so open to new knowledge and yet at the same time so stuck on his own ways that it's actually kind of ridiculous. Okay let me try to be coherent for at least a moment.

So on the one hand...

How often does he re-evaluate his knowledge? Short answer is, all the time. Neuvillette came to Fontaine to learn about himself and who he is, due to losing many memories but also largely due to being born in human form. That means by extension learning about humanity, and that's what he's been doing all those centuries. He is also fully aware that there is much he doesn't know, he doesn't understand, and perhaps he doesn't truly have the potential to understand due to being a dragon. It's something he openly acknowledges. In that sense, he is certainly open to new discoveries and new knowledge, and re-adjusting and changing what he knew or what he thought he knew about humans and the world around him that now belongs to them.

And there certainly is a high degree of self-doubt involved, too - as I mentioned, he questions not only what he understands, but what he's capable of understanding in the first place. We see that at the beginning of his story quest - in spite of having lived in Fontaine for about 500 years, Neuvillette not only didn't consider himself a part of it, but also in fact didn't seem to even consider that a possibility to begin with. It took the experiences of that whole investigation, everyone pitching in willingly to help him, and then Wriothesley and the Traveler spelling things out for him, for him to begin to realize that both Fontaine and he have changed without him noticing. However, this kind of realization doesn't lead to immediate change. I'd say he's still processing all that to this day, to be honest.

But that doubt also seems to be at least part of what causes him to stand in place, or at least move forward very slowly. He appears to be his own greatest limitation, and that's where I say,

On the other hand...

How often he actually applies this new knowledge he has gained and adjusts to it is a whole different matter, and here my brain just returns a bunch of static noises as the answer. Because for all his openness to learning new things about the world, humans and himself, and for all his readiness to accept and acknowledge everything he had been wrong about, Neuvillette is a horribly inflexible person for whom many meaningful kinds of change take entire centuries to contemplate and then implement. Or try to, anyway. To a varying degree and with varying results. Like as an example, I'm pretty sure Furina has been trying to get him to loosen up and interact more with the human world for centuries, and finally after five hundred years, during the last Lantern Rite, he decided to give it a shot. Finally he was going to implement what he had learned about humanity in all that time by initiating some sort of activity on his own!

So he went to one place in Liyue, tried one new thing, and went back to work after half a day. Good job, buddy.

But hey, baby steps.

And perhaps part of the problem, in addition to the self-doubt issue I mentioned earlier, is something that he himself mentions at the end of Lantern Rite, and something I've been thinking a lot with regards to him recently: he is hardly bereft of time. He is under no pressure to learn and change quickly and rapidly. Of course, this does not apply to matters related to his work, and this kind of knowledge will be put in practice much more effectively. For example, the serial disappearances case taught him that people will sacrifice themselves for spiritual needs as well as each other, so now he will know to consider that as a possible realistic motive in future cases. But matters related to his work are human matters, and human matters are under more time pressure - and time itself is also a human matter.

When it comes to changing himself, he is in no rush because he does not need to rush. He has all the time in the world. If he doesn't understand something now, he can take a couple decades or centuries to think about it. He has too much time.

And sometimes one has to wonder whether that's a good or a bad thing.

tl;dr he's a mess that needs to be studied in a lab

[prettybluelites]

Thoughts: Fun and Games

Started this last night, accidentally deleted it, got annoyed and went to bed.

Take two.

Yes Stede, the head butt was absolutely on purpose, but not because it was you, rather because a fearsome pirate woke up from a traumatic-on-every-level experience with someone hovering over him, six inches from his face. Ed would have head butted anyone on sheer instinct.

Fascinated by Buttons choosing to check in with Ed about his gravy basket experience, and you can tell Buttons sorta understands that Ed did have a vision, even if Ed doesn't say as much. Also, Buttons has been there a few times himself? Can you get there only through massive physical injury or can you like take a vision quest?

All well and good that the unicorn can't hear without a head, but probably a bigger selling point for Izzy is that it can't talk back

The crew's at a deadlock? Really? They sounded pretty firmly in favor of banishment. Did Stede just want to make sure Izzy got to have a say?

How many takes did they have to do with the sandwich, and was "sammie" scripted or improvised? I need to know.

On a serious note, how Stede's heart must have hurt to see Ed look at him like that

How fucked up and re-traumatizing for Ed to have his lil bunny friend snatched out from under his nose mere seconds after telling it that it would always be safe with him

Did I mention how the costumes keep getting better and better? Minnie Driver looks absolutely spectacular

In Stede's place I would have been scared to death to accept Anne and Mary's dinner invitation, solely on the basis of their predatory grins, but I guess love is stronger than all that

Also stronger than Ed pelting him with backhanded comments all evening

Love the incongruity of Roach talking about reminding the other crew of their value and safety while brandishing a cleaver

Whatever either Stede or Ed was expecting from the evening, it sure wasn't this

"Actually, I was planning on killing him myself" - subtext: still might if sufficiently provoked

Stede's expression when Ed says he regretted shaving his beard - so like his expression when Ed finds him on the beach in Ep9

Taika is so good in this whole scene. The tiny, tiny change in his expression when Stede says he likes his new beard, it's like he's processing that this is happening and willing himself to remain objective. And then Stede asks about the gravy basket and it snaps him back to reality and causes him to turn abrupt/short when he says he's fine. Good stuff.

Not gonna lie, I kinda hate the scene with the pinata and the cake. I get the point, but it feels clunky to me. I do appreciate everyone struggling with the concept of a safe space, lol, and I would love to know what exactly the "fucked up sleeping arrangements" are.

Another costuming note: Lucius is wearing the hell out of those high-waisted trousers.

I personally would not have described Stede as an "artsy outsider," but from Mary's POV I kinda get it, "artsy" sounds a bit derisive, like artsy-fartsy, and outsider sounds like...well, not a pirate. If that's Ed's type, I'd love to know about past outsiders he's been involved with. Likewise, I'm fascinated by Ed calling Stede "fragile" - he's clearly not meaning it as weak, but as fine/delicate. He says it so fondly. :)

Offering relationship advice by saying that everything will be rosy for a while and then eventually, inevitably, it's all going to go to hell and you're going to be left attempting murder to "keep things fresh" is, ah, kind of upsetting. Anne's tactic is upsetting too but at least "let's make them jealous" isn't explicitly violent.

It's really important to me that Roach (along with Fang) is one of the first to try to help Izzy up, same as he was the first to approach Buttons when Karl got killed. He really is tender as hell. :)

In my previous post, I mentioned how Ed still doesn't know that Mary wasn't the whole reason Stede didn't come to the dock - and I want to know, what's going to set off Stede's PTSD? We've seen the crew grappling with theirs and Ed is a walking ball of it. Stede's kinda been skating over everyone else's damage and he hasn't really even touched his own. He says he panicked, and admits he went back to his wife, but the part where he was abducted at gunpoint and nearly murdered is a pretty key part of the narrative. Taking a wild guess that's going to come up when we meet Prince Ricky again. And it's going to lead us into the Season Finale which SHIT I do not want to think about yet.

Others have probably already connected these dots but I'm obsessed with the fact that the blanket that Ed is hiding under so strikingly resembles the Battle Jacket. It should be renamed the Ed Teach is Lovable Jacket.

I just love me some everything about this scene. I love Stede's confidence in making himself heard and I love how throughout their talk Ed comes out from under the blanket, then sits up, then turns toward Stede by degrees, and finally gives that tiny, tiny, sad smile. And the dialogue is beautiful and heartfelt and Rhys and Taika just take it to a wonderful place.

My blood runs cold on Ed and Stede's behalf when Anne and Mary bust in on them, honest to god.

Oh, Izzy. *sniffle*

Ed and Stede both so adorkable negotiating where Ed's going to spend the night

I was honestly not crazy about the whole avian transmogrification thing at first, but the more I've thought about it, the more I like it. Buttons is completely confident in his ability to pull it off and in his reason for doing it - which is, of course, love. His pointing out to Ed that love requires change/growth is just a sweet touch. Was Buttons a "good" first mate? Who knows? Was he a decent human and apparently a legit vessel of magic? I think yes.

Also, if you're going to write a character out of your story, changing them into a bird is a bang-up way to do it. No klutzy off-screen death for Buttons.

Also also, I think it's worth remembering that Zheng uses carrier birds. I predict avian espionage in the future. And no, gulls were not used as carrier birds, but we all know Djenks has been hand-wavy about bigger things.

Izzy...is himself again. Also, loving the casual acknowledgement that there's been at least one other person on the Revenge this whole time who could read :P

My week is going to be insane so I might do Episode 5 tonight and get it out of the way. Thanks for reading!

[pollsonmorenichetopics]

Disproportionate Retribution Poll Round 1 Side B:

Jason Todd's (Batman/DC comics) Disproportionate Retribution:

"Crime 1: (metatextually it was being a child/boring/annoying/not Dick Grayson/whatever) being suspected of murder, running away, naivety/disobedience (in an attempt to save his surprise mother)

Punishment: (metatextually: vote to kill) fired, sold out by his mother, tortured by the Joker, blown up, and eventual death via smoke inhalation

Out of proportion: it is sooooo likely that he didn't even kill that guy in the first place. He was also like. A 15 year old boy at the time. Also just out of proportion on account of being child death and torture. He comes back later, which later leads to.

Crime 2: non-fatally shooting a crime boss, but being suspected of murder about it AGAIN

Punishment: getting the brakes beat off of him by his dad

Out of proportion: A: he was following the rules. B: Batman should have verified what was going on BEFORE doing anything. C: That's his DAD

Crime 3: at least he actually killed people

Punishment: (basically a) lobotomy via fear toxin

Out of proportion: it's non-consensual body/function modification. Any spike in adrenaline lead to a panic attack (you know what also causes adrenaline spikes? Fear/panic.). Comic book science was the only thing saving him from a heart attack. Even outside of that, being unable to properly fight or flee nearly got him killed again anyway. Not to mention it was Bruce back at it (in an altered state, but still)

Yes he committed actual crimes/did bad shit but literally some of the worst stuff happens when he does the LEAST. Worse people also get less for more."

Dhar's (Indivisible) Disproportionate Retribution:

"You have to bear with me on this because it's the context that makes it. He kills people as part of an evil army and dies unceremoniously without being mourned. Ok now context: Indivisible involves a lot of redemption and reincarnation. Dhar was kidnapped as a child and brainwashed and raised as a child soldier. He's 20 during the game but genuinely believes that he's doing the right thing. After he accepts that he wasn't, he tries to make up for it. Everyone hates him. He killed Ajna(mc)'s father and she never forgives him. This is understandable. When Ajna goes on a rampage, dealing death and destruction herself, Dhar sacrifices himself to bring her back to her senses. She kills him. She feels just a little bad about it. She's not sorry that he's dead. She gets to make amends and be forgiven by everyone for her actions, which is good! However it makes Dhar's death and him being forgotten afterward stand out that much more. Him not being liked or forgiven is very understandable, but he doesn't receive empathy even after cutting his own quest for redemption and life short for the sake of Ajna. The game ends with Ajna being reborn (she's a piece of the goddess of destruction and rebirth and they come back together and are reincarnated). So basically Dhar's death just feels disproportionate comparatively: if destroying the world or just many parts of it is something you can make amends for, and you can still be loved after, and you can be reborn to do better.. Surely Dhar could have done the same? If not, at least been acknowledged as having that potential."

[rhowena]

Assorted thoughts:

One fanfic idea I have is Vax finding himself on the other end of a "take me instead" while angel-of-deathing and going "...Okay, guess I've got a(nother) warlock now" because, really, what the hell are you supposed to say to that?

Even if Vax was offered the chance to return to life after being de-orbed, I'm not sure he'd be willing to take it any more than, say, Vex would be comfortable just abandoning her duties to the Council of Tal'Dorei and the Chamber of Whitestone. There's a quote from Honor Among Thieves that sums up my thoughts here -- "I’d only ask that you consider that this plane we call ‘life’ is but one of many. To drag your lady-love back to her old life is to deprive her of her new one." -- and Edgin's entire character arc is highly applicable.

Takes like this portray Vax as the rope in a tug-of-war between Vox Machina and the Raven Queen and I've read fics that seem to come from a place of wanting him to choose them over her, but from Vax's perspective, it isn't and never has been an either/or situation: he offered himself to the Raven Queen to bring Vex back, he pledged to put aside his reservations and serve her fully as part of a resurrection ritual for Grog, he agreed to come back as a revenant because he still wanted to help his friends, and the influence he has on the Material Plane even after his death is a privilege of his station. (The power of love alone doesn't let Zuala or Will bamf in from the hereafter to save their respective spouses.) Furthermore, far from being the jealous monster of fanon portrayals, the Raven Queen canonically praises Vax for his devotion to those he cares for ("Your resolve is admirable. Your love of your chosen family is vibrant.") and in the scenario where Vax knew there was a trap waiting for him at the Malleus Key but went anyway a la Fjord giving up the Cloven Crystal to save Jester (which I lean towards because a. the possibility of Vax angel-of-deathing for one or more of the murdered members of the Grim Verity and making some follow-up inquiries of his own has lodged itself in my brain and refused to go away and b. it would explain why he showed up specifically to save Keyleth rather than getting involved because of the whole 'people trying to kill his goddess' situation), I can see the Raven Queen not trying to stop him despite the consequences of letting him go because doing so would have amounted to trying to strip him of everything that led him to become her champion in the first place.

Regarding the Vaxleth disconnect specifically, it's heartbreaking to imagine Vax watching Keyleth's futile quest for a way to bring him back, and I suspect that she didn't visit Evontra'vir to try to talk to him (as Evontra'vir mentions other people doing) at least partially because she knew exactly what he'd say to her -- that she should go home and focus on living the life she has instead of obsessing over the one they might have had if things had worked out differently -- and wasn't in the mood to hear it.

Regarding the disconnect with Vox Machina as a whole ("I think you'll find life is full of unsatisfactory ends", etc.), what's interesting about the orb situation is that it gives them and the Raven Queen a common enemy in the form of someone who threatens to take Vax away from both parties and pushes them to work together to save him. The question of what happens after he's freed would then draw the conflict out for discussion and potentially some kind of resolution that could help them move past the lingering bitterness: on the one hand, I'm pretty sure Vax is going to be severely injured/weakened after spending a month-plus trapped in horrific unceasing agony and will, therefore, need to head back to Letherna posthaste not because the Raven Queen needs him to return to his duties but because he needs to go home and take a nap; on the other hand, if Vox Machina are doing the Raven Queen a big favor by putting all this work into rescuing her champion, immediately yanking Vax away from them would just feel wrong, so I'm hoping she offers a compromise of letting them Gate/Plane Shift over to keep him company while he heals, with the possibility of negotiating some vacation time for him once all the moon nonsense is dealt with. (I'm also hoping this all happens early enough that Vax can join them for some of the later battles because he should get to stab some assholes after the aforementioned month-plus of horrific unceasing agony.)

Continues to be baffling to me how much of the CR fandom refuses to understand that, by the end of C1 (and frankly way earlier in that campaign than many people realize) Vax’s vow to the Raven Queen was totally voluntary, important and meaningful to him, and not something he wanted a trick or lawyer to “get him out of.”

I guess it surprises me to still see this because an intense disagreement about this was perhaps the biggest point of contention (and indeed one of the most interesting parts) of Vax and Keyleth’s relationship. I loved the disconnect they had about it as characters and that they stayed together in spite of it. (It’s part of what made me such a fan of Vaxleth as a romantic story.) But the Vax side of that disconnect they had about faith and fate and the gods seems to have been totally lost in the fandom memory of the campaign.

Vax does not see his service to his goddess as something he would need “rescuing” from and he would resent the assumption. De-orbed Vax would probably first go back to his duty and service, because that was meaningful to him. Breaking the rules a few times to try to save Keyleth doesn’t negate that, it’s just on-brand for a character who wore his heart on his sleeve and often made brash decisions to protect people he loved without thinking it through.

[youngpoetthomasthorne]

D&D is finally back on! I'm thrilled to be back.

I had an artwork commissioned of my character Thomoras, I got to show it off today. The artist was lovely, very collaborative. They shall post it on tumblr soon, I will reblog it once it's up.

Today I was seated with a player from my first session here, finally. Thomoras had promised his character a bottle of wine in trade for protection. It's been at the back of my mind since, I thought I got to sit with him one or two sessions later, but he was actually substitute DMing for someone, so I didn't get to make up for it.

We traveled by cart up to a mountain filled with dwarfs, some social, some not so much. (I would just like to mention I despise that this is the most common way dwarfism is represented. Little people deserve better.)

The more social ones got a bit handsy at first. Either way, we got to a bar, where I bought this chap a bottle of wine. The bartender saw me hand it to him, and poured some wine for the whole party (and himself) because of it. The wine... Sounded quite unappetizing. I won't recount the details, but trust me when I say I was glad to not have actually tasted it in real life.

We got to a crowded hall where we were meant to meet up with someone. However, there was a fight about to start, and Thomoras happened to take notice that there were four groups of people, all singing different songs. Two players went off to watch the fight, one of them placed a bet (and lost). The other two players went off to the person we were supposed to meet. I, however, recognized two of the songs people were singing. One of which was more cheerful than the other. I shouted out that everyone pull themselves together and sing the same song, as the clashing sounds were getting quite bothersome. Thomoras then proceeded to do an amazing job playing background music for the cheerful song. (I rolled a nat 20, with my modifier it was a 27.) People started joining in, Thomoras got a look from a racist high elf (Thomoras is a half-elf), but the high elf's friend, who was also a high elf, seemed fine with Thomoras.

Eventually, everyone gathered to hear our mission. We were to complete a trial for the dwarfs in the mountain. Unfortunately I didn't quite catch why, I was quite unfocused today.

After some discussion, we decided to go with the trial of the hunter, which involved tracking down something (or someone) dangerous and defeating it (/them) and bringing back something to show of it.

When we asked for some guidance, we were told we could defeat a wyvern, since there were loads nearby, and we were advised of a monastery of fighters, in which we would be rewarded an orange gold coin of sorts to show we have defeated someone.

However, we were gently informed that wyverns were quite dangerous, and we also didn't get an exact location for the monastery. We decided to sleep on it, and perhaps gain some more intel.

During this time, Thomoras decided to go around asking to read a poem to anyone willing to listen. He finally found someone willing to listen, and started to read out a medium length poem, of only 30 minutes. He gained quite a crowd, but unfortunately they felt it got repetitive and was written badly. Remember the high elfs from earlier? The one that was NOT racist had changed his mind. He said that was about what you'd expect from a half elf. As he and his friend left, they even called Thomoras a *quarter* elf. I have never in my life felt greater pain.

While Thomoras was doing this, the other players were asking around, and apparently some people had seen a bloated elk corpse with two large wounds. We concluded it must have been from some kind of snake.

We returned to the person responsible for the trial of the hunter, announcing our decision to track down this beast and kill it.

Our quest got approved, and off we went. It didn't take us long to find the dead elk. It had decomposed quite rapidly, only having been dead for a few days. We concluded it was due to some kind of poison.

After a while, we found that the ground had an odd rainbow sheen to it. Two of the players rolled quite well on history/religion checks, so we learned that the tracks most likely belonged to a kind of rainbow snake. Either, a kind winged ond that would leave us alone, or a dangerous fallen one.

Moments later, we encounter this dangerous beast.

I would recount to you the battle in great detail, but it was already over right as we got into the 3rd round. I wanted to use my staff of the python, but the beast did consistently over 60 damage, which is Slitherz the fourth's HP. If he reaches 0, my staff breaks and he's dead for good. There's rumors of a player who lost their snake, cried, and never returned... And I would like to stay out of that rumor.

I'm quite thankful that I didn't release Slitherz, because one of the players died. He seemed quite casual about it, and the DM held sort of a funeral for his character. It was short, but it was respectful.

Right, I almost forgot! When we defeated the beast, it turned out that we had been followed by the trial of the hunter man, and he informed us that what we had defeated was... I believe a Naga? Which is a beast that regenerates. We hurried back with the head, which then got ushered away and presumably locked in some sort of cage.

At the end of it all, I (along with the rest of my team) got a sort of silver coin, engraved with dwarvish writing and anvils, as a sign of allegience.

During the game my bag of snacks (which was meant to be able to stand!) fell over and I lost around a third of it on the floor. :/

[haeresys-realm]

World, please no... There was awful story as a result of which we got really canonic Tighnari's voice replaced by such that mainers now switching to another language to play character without distasteful feeling. And I was really scared we could one day lose Mick Wingert, because it is the most great disaster in such sphere that can happen with this game. In contradistinction from Tighnari's case there's are NO really matching and canonical voice of the Doctor.in this game comparatively with Mick. If you didn't hear his Dottore, you didn't hear Dottore at all. The character will be dead without him. After not only hearing how he's acting as Dottore but seeing how canonic he see him, for example signing the cards like «Join.me in my quest for knowledge?», it's absolutely not an option to find another actor for the Doctor, and even Mick himself don't want to stop acting as him. So... Fuckin' Hoyoverse please stop disappointeing not only us but even your own co-wokers. It's really scaring situation. We should involve somehow to tell them this is inappropriate. We can't lose such great actors because this shitgivers are getting reckless because of their overindulgence.

P.S. I was talking not about adequate sanctions, good replacement or/and good trainings for Tighnari's voice actor, not about the fact you shouldn't do anything with situations such as one with Elliot Gindi. So, please, don't start all this shit about victimblaming just because I hate how non-corresponding new VA is sounding, we are not even talking about Tighnari, it was mentioned just in context with situations where they replace something good you used to play to something bad you want to switch. Dottore's case is even worse because the actor didn't do anything bad and because there's no other language dubbing that can correspond his level of canon. Unfortunately. This is why this situation is so TECHNICALLY scaring...

[fearofgodandtolkien]

The short answer? Yes. The long answer? Buckle in kids.

Odysseus is famous for two things: being the be all and end all of tricksters and getting involved in things that he really didn't need to be involved in, sometimes by accident and sometimes on purpose. The Kira case is the sort of thing he'd get involved in on purpose, because catching a magical mass murderer who thinks he's a god is exactly the sort of fascinating and complicated logic puzzle that would appeal to him and also because there are so many shenanigan possibilities encompassed in that side quest. He would be delighted to join the task force and ready to lend all his capacious mental abilities to the mission.

Now for his qualifications. Odysseus is the king of lying and misdirection and also very smart (not to mention being backed up by the goddess of wisdom, who we'll get to in a moment). Whether Light knows his name or not would really depend on how much Light knows of Greek history/mythology and whether he would be able to identify this grizzled but jovial stranger as the King of Ithaca, but considering Odysseus' track record of lying his ass off about his identity and getting away with it, I doubt he would be spotted. He'd probably call himself the Japanese equivalent of Nobody for shits and giggles. No one's pointing fingers on this squad, considering Mr. Gothic Uppercase Letter over there, who, apropos of nothing, would absolutely adore this guy. They would spend hours bonding over fake names and trickery. Odysseus would immediately gain L's liking with his flair for morally dubious ploys and tricking his enemy, and he would definitely be able to keep his balance playing Light's mind games. With his charisma and personality, he would gain the trust of the team quickly and would probably be able to worm his way into the trust of some suspicious figures (cough cough Misa cough cough). He's also got a goddess on his side giving him hints when he really needs them and divine intervention when he does something too incredibly stupid, though he likely wouldn't need her aid on this one because honestly? I feel like his intelligence, sneakiness, and general savvy are above and beyond a lot of the main crew. He can manage this by himself.

Odysseus' fatal flaw is his hubris, and that's the only thing that could really bring him down here. He would be prone to carry the game too far for comfort and possibly give Light the opportunity to find his name and kill him, but that's still unlikely. All in all, Odysseus would catch Kira in good time, survive with flying colors, get a new best friend and partner in crime, and probably become an honorary Wammy orphan.

(Of course, in respect to the traditional structure of the story, he'd have to have some sort of defeat as a result of his hubris. Personally I'm a fan of L dying because of him somehow.)

[icharchivist]

honestly this just shows again that wmtsb is SO GOOD, because i feel bad for everyone involved. sandy and belial and you even made a case for lucilius. theyre all such poor meow-meows. not to mention lucifer. and beelzebub is also here, ig, being gay and homophobic about it, hope he manages to sort that out for himself

dFMKJDF NO BUT RIGHT COMPLETELY!!!

wmtsb is truly peak event, i do really feel bad for everyone. And well i can understand the "anyway my life catastrophically suck and i'm going to put the world through an apocalypse to cope" that most of them have going on (Lucifer is the only one basically just begging them 'please just all go to therapy" in the meantime).

they're people who were created by the whims of fate, abandoned to their own device, and tried to cope with what it meant to have a purpose (or lack of), to exist for a reason.

I do also feel bad for Bubs but in his case i do think wmtsb didn't really do a good job fleshing him out until later in his raid quest. Because in a sense he's in a similar situation than Lucilius, he's also a clone, I think it's also implied he has Shalem's memories but he probably doesn't remember them as clearly as Lucilius does. So it explains why Bubs was the only astral to support Lucilius's actions, because while he didn't grasp it as much as Lucilius did, he felt the same groundwork as Lucilius did.

It's interesting in that sense that therefore Lucilius and Beelzebub has two drastically different God Complex. Lucilius wants to take down the God that made his life a joke and destroy the world He had created, and to redo it all mostly out of spite toward God. Beelzebub meanwhile genuinely believes he is owned to rule over all of the skies. Destruction is a means to an end. for Lucilius, Destruction is The End.

And i think it's even more interesting considering on one hand one is the clone of Sahar, the one who's desperately trying to follow what God wanted and who is set to destroy the Otherworld for his God after all, while the other is the clone of Shalem, who rebelled and questioned God's intentions so much so she got locked away.

(and also probably, is the reason why Lucilius has stronger memories than Bubs. Sahar lived longer than Shalem because Shalem got locked away, meaning Lucilius had more of the scope of Sahar's despair to take from compared to Bubs).

And it's ironical because Lucilius and Beelzebub both are rebelling to prove their Free Will, but in a sense they still copy their originals without even realizing it. Lucilius's destruction to get the eye of the Omnipotent on him, Beelzebub's rebellion as to challenge the God for his own gain, reflects Sahar and Shalem's storyarcs as well.

So the thing is that i feel like Bubs doesn't have a place anywhere. He's not as lost as Lucilius, his original isn't even here anymore (and wouldn't return until after Bubs had been locked away by Cags), he doesn't belong with the Astrals but he doesn't belong with Lucilius either. He relates to Lucilius, but their differences is creating a major divide between them.

And it's even further illustrated by Beelzebub becoming half Primal, and the time he had spent in the Otherworld.

First, the Primal thing, wheree Beelzebub was completely torn to shred by Otherworldly beings after a mission Lucilius sent him on, only to come back to see Lucilius make experiment on him out of pure scientific curiosity, to "save him", making him half primal, which as we know, ended up being Bubs's downfall as Cags could therefore lock him away. Beelzebub didn't ask for any of this, Lucilius didn't save him out of compassion, and the process was described as a torture, and there is this foreign body on Bubs that he has to cope to deal with.

He can't help but love Lucilius as well, he's the only person who understands him, but he has to curse Lucilius for even being in that state. and i think it's why even more Bubs is dedicated in becoming the King of the skies, to not be belittled by Lucilius having made him "lesser".

Meanwhile the Otherworld thing also is pretty horrifying like. Those beings torn him to shred, those beings are the only thing that could kill a primal which he half became, and he was locked in the Otherworld for thousands of years having to fight them to survive. This, also, is pretty horrible to imagine.

and once again an interesting way to compare them to Sahar and Shalem. Because while otherwise they copy their originals, after the failed Civil War, Lucilius ended up in limbo, the same way Shalem has been unconscious for thousands of years, while Bubs was doomed into fighting the Otherworld, like Sahar was doing for thousands of years. I think it's such a neat detail.

In a sense, everyone in wmtsb is doomed by the narrative, doomed by fate, and it extends to Beelzebub still. The problem with Beelzebub is that instead of exploring it into wmtsb itself they locked his story in HL raid quests super late in the story that most people have a hard time unlocking and that's awful.

I feel like Bubs might have less of an emotional plotline in general, but it still ties him back to the thematic of the wmtsb gang in a way that's bonechilling. They're all fucked, they're all tragic, and all of this wouldn't have been happening if Lucilius and Beelzebub hadn't been suffering from being clones to start with.

But yeah adding to that layer too, Bubs is also part of the "doomed by his crush on the Luci-gang" thematic that affects literally everyone in this saga. Luci brainrot disease make you act unwise (apocalypse)

I still feel bad for Bubs because of that though.. though disclaimer i didn't read his quest fully, i only saw bits of some scenes on Twitter so maybe there's even more to help out on his reading there. But, he's still fucked, and wmtsb is still a masterpieces.

(but that said i still agree with the gay and homophobic, rip Bubs you did your best)