#he does this for a living so
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ren’s body count: 670+
#he does this for a living so#im also including like hand jobs and oral and other encounters that are more than kissing and feeling up#he has a lot of return customers or regulars but he sees a lot of foreigners and a lot of one offs#he’s been doing this for like 7-8 years so#you have to remember there are only 365 days in a year so#also ive done research on some other professionals and their numbers so his is like medium#higher than usual but not the highest#this also deters like a lot of romantic partners#and why sho jokes that ren has slept with all of Tokyo#tbh it’s probably higher but#gotta cap a man
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Katniss is such an unreliable narrator. She says "Then something unexpected happens. At least, I don't expect it because I don't think of District 12 as a place that cares about me" girl you deliver strawberries to the Mayor, you hunt and trade for the district, when you fell at Prim being chosen someone caught you, when you went to Prim people parted for you, when you volunteered EVERYONE stopped. Idk how to tell you but I think you're a pillar of the community.
#katniss everdeen#the hunger games trilogy#the hunger games#primrose everdeen#hunger games#batcavescolony reads the hunger games#suzanne collins#'now it seems i have become someone precious' NOW? GIRL BFFR you're their hunter girl#and this isn't negative just bffr girl#your WHOLE DISTRICT did the three finger salute that you yourself says means admiration thanks and goodbye to someone you love and on top is#old a rarely used. your WHOLE DISTRICT decided in that moment that they needed to bring back this sign of respect for YOU#...................................................................#idk why some people are thinking i mean this as negative i don't she is unreliable but its not intentional. like when Peeta heart stoped in#CF she doesn't know what Finnick is doing at first cus she doesn't know off the top of her head what cpr is. she also thinks Peeta after the#reaping is acting for the cameras. he isnt we dind out later his mom basically told him Katniss was gonna win and he would die. obviously#shes not doing it on purpose shes just for lack of better words uneducated? as in she doesn't know everything shes not omnipotent#so when Plutarch (? second games guy) shows her his mokingjay hiden watch shes like *wtf that's weird?* then the people traveling to#district 13 show her the mockingjay cookie and explains it and she then goes on the difference between his watch and their cookie#and why does eveyone act as if district 12 is as bad as the capital? they CANT help Katniss and Prim in the way you want. they cant give#them food. none of them have any! and im not putting iton Katniss but they hid they needed food so they could stay together. it sounds like#some of you are in this our world mentally of what people do after a loved one dies (brings food constantly checks on them etc) district 12#cant do that. they dont have food and they're all suffering. you cant give someone food when you have none to give. then theirs the fact#that peeta DID help. Peeta buring the bread and tossing some to her then taking a beating from his mom is a HUGE thing in the books.#he used his resources to help her like you all said someone should.#district 12 DID (rip) care about Katniss before the hunger games. why do you think she was allowed to hunt? or how her trades were good#these are the little ways 12 can shows Katniss they love her. but again Katniss doesn't see this and YES its because she had ptsd before the#hunger games as well. i swear some of you make it seem like d12 was all living a life of luxury and glaring down at Katniss.#other things that show Katniss is in hight standing with at least her people of d12 is her dad was known enough through d12 for peeta dad to#comment on his singing along with his commenting on her mom. also her mom is a healer in the community. yeah her parents arnt the top but#of d12 but they are/were definitely high staning in the Seam.
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Michael can survive (almost) anything in FNAF
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf movie#michael afton#helpy#fnaf sister location#fnaf pizzaria simulator#Michael has a very set number of skills#he’s actually almost indestructible#UNLESS it gets hot#This is so funny to me#LIKE I’ll be honest I wouldn’t last in the heat as well especially in small stuff rooms#but specifically funny to Michael#cause he’s gone through so much worse in comparison#dude lost all his organs and bones and he got back up quicker than he does to heat#DUDE lives in Utah and can’t handle a summers day 💀#this is why all his shirts didn’t have sleeves as a kid#dude was dying out there#this is how you can tell he’s British#he longs for a rainy day
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17 year old, CEO Tim Drake canceling a press conference and then putting out a statement like, “Sorry for canceling last min, Alfred said that he was going to run my laptop through the dishwasher if I didn’t clean my room. I think he’d do it :/. Also, wasn’t really in the mood. Cya -Tim.”
#I love teen ceo Tim drake so much and he’s not even canon#there are a lot of angsty fics and I love them but I think there’s such a potential for comedy#WE employees gain thousands of followers just live-tweeting the insane shit he does every day#‘CEO probs not putting out statement about new tech bc I just watched his brother pull him kicking and screaming out of the building’#‘found my ceo sleeping in the elevator again’#‘head of R&D just asked me decipher an email at the CEO sent to him. it reads like gen z word salad’#‘Tim Drake is a wonderful boss. he did just ask me if I wanna see him ollie. it was pretty sick’#Tim drake#ceo tim drake#alfred pennyworth
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who is your favorite AA character? 👁️👁️
ziska… I hope capcom brings her back someday
#shes cool as fuck to me bc when I first played jfa I found her really frustrating to deal with#not just as Phoenix but I mean like on a personal level she is challenging because she’s so thorough#and yet I also find it fascinating that she breaks the character she’s built for herself once in a while#i 100% believe that I don’t think she would have caught on to what Phoenix was trying to do while stalling for time with engardes trial#so it’s probably a good thing edgeworth subbed in but she literally busts her ass to bring evidence to court#almost right after having a bullet extracted from her WHICH SHE ALSO PRESENTS AS EVIDENCE. thats metal as fuck ok#especially since she would technically have nothing to do with the case after edgeworth fills in and she still decided to do that anyway#maybe it was blind faith to use that evidence to win since she wasn’t there for most of the trial but still#and even if canon doesn’t give it to me I still firmly believe there’s be at least some chemistry between her and Maya#like especially if you hold it next to wrightworth that works bc there’s already a history there and majority of Phoenix and miles trying#to relearn their relationship is Phoenix coaxing out that side of Miles that he remembers from fourth grade#but with Franmaya it’s something new and they’re basically strangers to each other and one of them almost got the other convicted#and I still think that’s fascinating and it’s a damn shame thay half of the fics I find for them on ao3 is background in wrightworth fic#i did find a good one that touched on Franziska trying to win pearls approval because Pearl does hold a grudge against her#and seeing that trying to live up to perfecting even her personal relationships without getting to know Pearl to even know#why it wasn’t working feels believable when I think abt her as a character yk#myart#my art#doodles#aa#ace attorney#franziska von karma
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Being someone who read Under The Red Hood and came out with the firm belief that, for Jason, it's not about killing Joker, it's about Jason wanting proof Batman would choose him over the Joker (bc shelia chose the joker). Makes seeing any other media where it's all about just wanting the Joker dead is a teeny bit frustrating. to be honest
Jason could've killed the Joker himself, really, really easily. Jason kidnaps the Joker before the confrontation. I can't open my comic for a reference right now, but it felt like he had the Joker for quite a bit before the confrontation. He had him. He beat him up with a crowbar. He had every single opportunity to kill the Joker himself, but he didn't because that wasn't his goal. Make no mistake, he did plan for the Joker to be dead by the end of it, but do you see what im trying to say here
Edit: If I knew this post was gonna get 1000+ notes I would've tried to word it better or something, this was a rant I made on the way to the grocery store 😭
It's not about making Batman kill either. When Batman says he won't kill, Jason adjusts and goes, 'Let ME kill the Joker or kill me to stop me' instead. The test is all about Batman choosing him. The whole final confrontation is Jason's first death again. The parent, The Joker, and the explosives. It even ends with Jason unable to move as a bomb goes off right next to him again because the parent didn't choose Jason. And instead tried finding an option that'd benefit them and (consequencely) letting the Joker walk, again, lol, lmao <-in agony
#the final confrontation was basically his first death again#and YES he Does want the Joker dead#and it would've been really really nice if Batman was the one who did it#but when batman made it clear he wouldn't kill the joker. Jason easily switched to saying “LET me kill the joker” to accommodate#because he Wanted batman to pass his test#he gave a test to dick too. and technically tim but it wasnt the family test it was a different one so it doesnt rly count#AFTER utrh and the reveal and the batarang you can go hog wild about it. i care less about it then#granted i do believe they make jason more scared of the joker after it at some point#i guess because hes a bit too willing to kill the joker and ive heard jason wasnt meant to live after utrh#my watsonian explain for that is he was so fixated on his plan he cpuld override his fear. or maybe the pit. either work#i prefer the fixation bc i dont like the explanation that the pit was the /only/ reason he could get all plan together and done#BUT THATS UNRELATED!!!#dc stop putting the joker in jason stories im begging you please please please. lock him in a vault for the next 20 years or something#it Cpuld be good and i understand. but also. after so long of people that dont know or go for jasons need for family and parents#that love him and he can trust#the joker starts to feel like?? hm. words. a cop out? oh haha its that guy that killed him woagh hes here#i bet you dont even know that jaybin got beat until unconsciousness by an angry mob#while asking batman to save him only for batman to have to walk away#anwya. where was i going with this#i think i got off topic#jason todd#dc comics#batman#ADDED AN EDIT. SORRY. this post has been haunting me it keeps me awake. what if people misunderstand#they cant read my tags where i ramble more depth. thisbis the only option#EDIT EDIT: hiii#removed the sentence abt jason having the joker for several days bc i misremembered some things#go read its-your-mind 's addition instead also#ok no more i wont edit this post anymore i promise
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cillian murphy accepting the award with his wife's lipstick all over his face and asking the crowd if he's got lipstick on his nose and continuing even when they said yes. this is making me feel. things
#cillian murphy#that was so. romance of him#like what do you MEAN he accepted a golden globe with his wifes lipstick all over his face#golden globes#WHO DOES THAT. THATS SO OLD SCHOOL LOVERBOY CODED WHAT DO YOU MEANNNN IT HAPPENED ON TELEVISION LIVE#i am ill
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Dc x Dp Prompt #6
“I’m a twin”, Damian said one night. He could feel the narrowed eyes of his family drilling holes on his back in disbelief. Not that he could blame them. Damian had never so much as implied being raised with a companion, much less a sibling.
“I had a brother”. Damian paused to recollect himself. He had not said his brother’s name out loud in over 8 years.
“His name was… Danyal”. Damian hated the way his voice wavered, but he could not help it. Danyal was everything to him, his other half. Their heart beat as one and when one heart stopped beating, the other one died with it. At least until his family put his heart on metaphorical life support without ever realizing.
“Where is he now?” His father asked, voice filled with knowing grief and a hint of betrayal. It had in fact been 6 years since Damian first showed up on his doorstep.
“Up there”. All eyes shifted towards the specific star he was pointing to. “Right before he died, he promised me he’d guide me from the stars. Unfortunately, the stars are not visible in Gotham, so my brother is unable to be of much help unless I leave the city.”
“Your brother is Polaris, the North Star?” Tim questioned warily, most likely in attempts to not offend him. Damian was aware of how stupid it sounded, but Danyal had promised, and his brother never broke his promises.
“Yes. Danyal is with the stars now, just as he always wanted”
#dc x dp#dp x dc#dpxdc fanfic#dc x dp prompt#dp x dc prompt#dc x dp crossover#dp x dc crossover#ghost king danny#demon twin au#danyal al ghul#batpham#they are not in Gotham at the time of this conversation#I’m thinking they’re visiting the Kent’s on their farm but tbh as long as the stars are visible it can be anywhere#Danny did in fact reincarnate as Polaris#sort of#Polaris is more of a title the Realms gave him the day he was crowned#he is the star meant to guide them through a new era#or something like that#But Damian does look up at the stars for guidance whenever he sees them#and before he knows it he’s accidentally begun praying to Danny#it’s his coping mechanism for being unable to speak about him to anyone#but back to Danny - he regained the memories of his time as Danyal Al Ghul when he died in that portal and became a halfa#well it was more he regained the memories of ALL his previous lives but his most recent one holds a special place in his heart#if only because he knows his brother is still alive on whatever earth he was born on#as bad as it sounds Danny can’t wait until he gets to reunite with Damian#he hopes Damian forgives him for not guiding him though#fun fact! Danny was once known as the god Dan-El in one of his previous lives#he’s ALSO the reincarnation of the Greek Titan Astraeus (and he’s pretty sure Dani is his daughter Astraea)#his previous lives are all so interesting (he still can’t believe he was raised an assassin or that he was a god in multiple lives)#but in all honesty it’s even weirder feeling so old and so young at the same time
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woe be upon ye
#ouch#im thinking spared nari is gonna be devastated that he let his sons i mean disciples lay down their lives for him#though that was their job#but he was the one to give them that job oh regret#man nari hates the lamb so much after that (also himself#but its easier to hate the lamb) like they took his crown they took his sons they took his freedom they took everything#yet they still liberated him from his chains#is this what he waited a millennium for?#good thing we can resurrect them phew major crisis averted#narinder#aym#baal#the lamb#narilamb#lmao this does not deserve the ship tag but im just gonna tag every art piece where they feature together as narilamb#since thats the end goal#cult of the lamb#cw blood#my art
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simon pining for his fwb, getting all jealous when he finds you grinding on someone else in the dance floor, so much so that he pulls you away.
you yell out his name as he tugs you out, calling out for him to stop, but simon is a quiet wall, not really listening. not really caring.
what does make him pause is the vitriol in your words, hushed, and exhausted — “i’m not your anything, simon.”
…right. that’s right.
he’s just got to show you, then, that he is more than what you think he could be. show you, then, what you’re missing out.
(callused fingers grip your waist, holding, using as leverage. his scarred lips are tugged in a snarl, grunting, rumbling.
his desire is so much bigger than himself.
uncontainable. uncontrollable.
and yet, it’s the quiet sob that wrenches itself out of his throat that makes your stomach flutter. that makes you feel the honest curl of pleasure pooling in the base of your spine.
“please,” he whispers, folding before you, bowing until his trembling breath is tickling the rise of your chest. “please.”
your fingers twitch, hesitating, then you’re bringing your hand up to curl them on the base of his hair.
“i know,” you reply, mind a numb press, suspended underneath the tides of your ecstasy. “i’ve got you, si.”)
—
(ful)
#idk what this is but the pining does NOT end. nothing actually gets resolved#you leave the next morning anyway. trudging out quietly so you dont wake him up as he slumbers#and when he does wake up he will have to live with the fact that you do not love him back no matter what he does#suns#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley
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Gladiator II Trailer - SNL (2024)
Bonus:
#gladiator#gladiator ii#paul mescal#snl#saturday night live#snledit#paulmescaledit#byaurore#tuserpris#tuserrachel#userallisyn#nessa007#tuserlarissa#userzo#tusertha#userines#useriselin#userisaiah#userdiana#useradie#userzaynab#userquel#userreh#userbecca#userpayel#userveronika#userrlaura#userkam#why does this genuinely looks good.............. and he sounds so good too
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apollo’s confidence in court: oh my god i’m the worst lawyer ever my client is going to go to JAIL because i can’t even do my JOB
apollo’s confidence outside of court: i’m the only smart one here, i’m the most normal guy in the world and NO ONE is doing it like i am, investigations are EASY, klavier gavin wants me carnally
#ace attorney#apollo justice#klavier gavin#klapollo#ace attorney incorrect quotes#the last one isn’t even his confidence tbh it’s just a fact#he says it like he doesn’t ALSO want klavier gavin carnally though which he does#alternatively:#apollo at klavier in court: *sweats* he’s so hot and competent#apollo at klavier outside of court: um…hello….you are kind of really nice🥺👉👈#disgusting#im obsessed with them#preordered the new trilogy of three games i already own today😌#$60 of my very hard earned money right into that#and i cant even regret it im SO excited#all the extrassssss#PLEASE go look at the aa twitter account to see the art extras btw#they’re SO fun#apollo justice trilogy really being about 75% of my will to live rn
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Not beating the allegations.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#jiang cheng#su she#lan qiren#(I oscillated between writing a funny or a serious final comic for season 2 so hard I did both. Enjoy the funny bonus!)#Woah hey! Two characters we have not seen in a long time!#Su She hasn't been seen in 100 comics! Unfortunately LWJ has a taste for his blood. He has only moments left to live.#I honestly thought LQR died (adaption memory blur) and I did *not* expect him to show up here.#That said it does act as a way more personal blow to LWJ's reputation for LQR to be there.#By staying on WWX's side he's not only throwing his reputation to the wind but also facing familial judgment.#It hits so much harder when the choice isn't an easy one to make.#Choosing to stand at someone's side when they *have* actually messed up - when they do have faults and flaws - that's love.#Love is hard work! Love is not low maintenance and good days every day.#Love is being able to say 'I am choosing to bear your weight when things are heavy.' Love is doing that reciprocally.#Which is 100% a real life lesson I am passing on#And also a plea for why it is so important we give credit to WWX's atrocities.#He *did* do some of that shit. He isn't fully innocent and it gives LWJ's choice so much more weight.
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Bingqiu AU where Luo Binghe's the chosen village sacrifice to the evil deity who lives up the mountain.
Normally the village sends maidens, but they've more or less run out of expendable girls of the right age and, ahem, "virtues". So of course Luo Binghe's early life bad luck kicks in. In the wake of his mother's death there's no one to really care about what happens to him, he's fairly pretty, and the village leaders decide that if they dress him up like a girl the teenaged homeless kid should pass well enough. And hey, y'know, he's probably got a hard life ahead for him anyway -- dying in a brothel of some venereal disease or on the streets of exposure or starvation. At least as a sacrifice, everyone else gets to benefit from his loss! And the kid will get added to a shrine and be remembered as a hero! If anything, he should be happy about this!
Binghe is not happy about this.
But he's also a skinny underfed nobody who is easily overpowered, dressed up like a bride, and tied to a post. So. Not much he can do but wait for the evil deity to come and do whatever horrible thing he's gonna do to him.
Meanwhile, Shen Yuan is pretty sure he's been isekai'd into the over-powered hero of some kind of supernatural adventure story? He's not totally sure because he doesn't recognize the setting, but the signs are there. He's got a shrine-like base of operations (though it seems to have become corrupted/ruined, probably he has to restore it somehow), he has a very resilient and handsome new body with spiritual energy of some kind flowing through him, and a very clearly magical sword. Plus lots of neat starter powers! Though it feels like he has other abilities that have been blocked somehow? Probably he has to level up in order to access them.
When he treks out of his "base" and finds what seems to be a distressed maiden, he takes it for his beginner hero mission. The girl claims that she's been doomed to be sacrificed to an evil god. That sounds a little above Shen Yuan's pay grade for dealing with, so he unties her and decides that they had better just get out of the whole region altogether. He already packed up anything useful from his base, anticipating he might get caught up in an adventure once he left, so they follow the river away from the settlement until they reach another one.
While they travel, Luo Binghe tells Shen Yuan about the cursed deity, Shen Qingqiu, who was cast out of the heavens for slaughtering one of his brethren and has apparently being do-who-knows what to maidens from the local village in exchange for his "protection" ever since. Sounds like a real asshole! And also mid-level boss type bad guy at least. Shen Yuan hopes he doesn't have to fight him, but he probably will.
Thank goodness he found Binghe, though! Clearly the helpful little sister type! He's definitely going to require her assistance if he's going to figure out how to navigate this world and level up his skills enough to take on a god.
#svsss#bingqiu#scum villain's self saving system#scum villain#luo binghe: I don't know why the evil deity toys with me this much but as long as he is amused then he's not killing me#luo binghe: each day he lets me live is another blessing especially since I have no hope of escape#luo binghe: is it for some sick amusement that he drags me to and from the dens of monsters and feigns ignorance?#luo binghe: if I reveal that I know the truth will the ruse end? does he do this with all his sacrifices?#luo binghe: or is he toying with me because he knows that I'm not really a maiden at all? standing on this knife's edge is unbearable#luo binghe: and yet somehow this is the most stable my life has been ever since the death of my poor mother#luo binghe: the world is cruel -- perhaps if I become whatever it is this god desires I might be shielded from more of it for another day#luo binghe: wait I have heavenly demon blood? then... perhaps my dark master considers me a suitable companion thanks to this?#luo binghe: are we two companions in this wretched world? outsiders sharing scorn and thus only able to find solace in each other?#luo binghe: is this what it feels like to care and be cared for? it's been so long I had almost completely forgotten it#shen yuan: gosh these upgrades are getting convoluted I wish I had a skill menu or something#shen yuan: oooh neat a slime! easy exp!
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As much as I love fics of the Batfam dramatically reacting to the loss of Tim's spleen, here is what I want more of:
Bruce: So you don't have a spleen?
Tim: No, sir.
Bruce: Is Doctor Leslie aware?
Tim: She is.
Bruce: Do we have to be worried about whoever injured you coming to Gotham?
Tim: No, sir.
Bruce: Are you taking all required medication?
Tim: Yes, I am.
Bruce, releasing a sigh that is soul-deep: Okay.
Other Batkids: WHAT???
Bruce: Tim and Jason share the mantle of my Middle Child by age. They act like it. This isn't even the strangest thing I've learned about Tim.
Damian, Duke, Dick, & Cass: *all a mixture of sputtering and eyeing Jason & Tim suspiciously*
Jason: I'm offended but you're not wrong.
Tim: *shrugging in agreement and going back to whatever he was doing*
#if we throw Helena Wayne from the Tomorrowverse in the mix then Tim is the direct middle child#Jason never lived in the manor with his younger siblings but he has Middle Child Energy#So does Tim#has anyone compared Tim's Robin run to Dick or Jason#it's complete chaos#batman#tim drake#batfamily#batkids#bruce wayne#tired dad bruce#dc robin#dc red robin#dcu#tim drake's missing spleen
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horrible truth bomb dropped on my head 20 min ago
#I DIDNT KNOW I DIDNT KNOWWWWW#when i say damn thats crazy its bc i DO think its crazy i think a lot of things are crazy. like how birds have cloacas#or the way ppl draw a five pointed star in different ways and everyone assumes their way of doing it is how everyone does it#my brother is not letting me live this down btw he literally shouted at me like HOW DID YOU LIVE THIS LONG AND NOT PICK UP ON THAT#IDK!!! IDK I THOUGHT SOMETIMES IT COULD BE USED TO EXPRESS GENUINE SHOCK??????#he says its my delivery that makes it sound insincere bc i say it in a monotonous voice which when i think abt it YEAH....#THAT DOES MAKE IT LOOK KINDA BAD IN HINDSIGHT.....#and then i told him i keep a list of phrases that tickle my brain so i can remember to use them in conversation and apparently#most ppl dont do that bc he was like ???? stop doing that??? just let the conversation flow naturally it sounds fake>????#idk man i feel like if i did that and blurted out 'i forgot people find stuff like underwear arousing for some reason' instead of#smth like 'i wonder what kind of ppl find this kind of stuff the bees knees' like i normally do. it would. not go so well.#ALSO THE FLOW CHARTS ARENT NORMAL? i make flow charts before i call the bank or smth so i know what to say#its not just to blend in its also so i dont waste ppls time going uhhhhh as i think of how i put smth into words#its called stalling for time and i dont care if i have to say smth like thats just how the cookie crumbles if it gives me#5 more seconds to process whatever the fuck someone said without letting them think im not paying attention#doodles#diary#sona#puppysona#comics
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