#having a fun trip down memory lane over here

[allenvooreef]

Couldn't resist drawing a cover for Tales of Mirrors, even though I didn't end up using it in the binding of the book. Revisiting these old original characters after roughly 14 years was really fun, and it reminded me how far I've come. This is the kind of stuff past me was attempting to make but didn't have the skills for yet! Adding some of my old art for this novel below the cut. Also, did you spot the familiar face?

[stevie-petey]

episode seven: the massacre at hawkins lab

Steve coughs, swatting at the particles in the air. “Just inhaled a bunch of that crap.” “I’ve been trying not to think about how much of the Upside Down we’ve ingested since being here.” “It’s stuck in my throat, Y/N.” “Again, I’m trying not to think about that.

Summary: bats are really fucking annoying to fight, you always somehow end up critically injured, nancy carries the group on her back as always, eddie gives steve relationship advice (embarassing, tbh), interdimensional bike riding is lowkey fun, and you take a trip down memory lane.

Rating: general, some swearing, violence

Warnings: fem!reader, use of y/n, cursing, blood and gore, critical injuries, mentions of fainting, mentions of death and violence, description of corpses

Words: 11.9k

Before you swing in: ive never been more excited to write a chapter tbh. this episode touches on so many things ive been building up for seasons now !!!! insane !!! im so so so excited to see how yall react. this chapter has my favorite sequence of scenes yet ;) enjoy !

–

His name rips from your mouth. “Steve!” 

The bats sink their fangs into his stomach. His legs kick out, he gasps for breath, choking on his pain. Your legs threaten to give out as you stumble towards Steve. Quickly your fingers find the knives you always carry with you just as a bat lunges towards you.

Barely having time to dodge its quick attack, you swat at the creature, but your knives slide off its skin easily. Your heart drops; their flesh is too thick to cut through. The bat screeches at you, its teeth bared, and you throw your body weight against it onto the ground. Angling your knife, you pierce the inside of its mouth, killing it. 

“Shit!” Another bat crawls towards you. Your elbow scrapes the ground as you roll out of its path, slicing into the creature’s maw. 

Steve screams again, this time even louder as even more bats surround him. Frantic, you jump to your feet. Without thinking, you grab the tail of one of the bats, its face buried in Steve’s stomach. When you start to pull, Steve shakes his head violently and throws his arm out at you. “Go!”

You don’t bother answering; you’re not leaving him. 

The bat’s tail cuts your palms as you pry it off of Steve’s flesh, but as soon as it’s removed, it latches onto your upper thigh. “Fuck!”

Razor sharp pain shoots through your entire body. The bat loosens its jaw to only tighten it more; you can feel its teeth hit your bone. Screaming, the white-hot pain blinds you. Your knees give out and you fall before you can catch yourself.

“Y/N!” Steve chokes out, desperate. He clenches his jaw, tries to get up. More bats screech overhead, circling you, and Steve knows you only have seconds before you’re dead. But the vines around his neck constrict even more. His airway closes, another bat takes the other one’s place on his stomach. 

“Motherfucker!” You stab at the bat, but then a second one slams against your body and your shoulder explodes with pain. “Fuck-no,” you try to twist around, to use the last of your strength to remove it from your own skin, but it’s no use. The bats tear at your skin, ripping through muscle and ligaments. 

Lightning flashes, its light red mars the endless dark blue sky. Above you, a bat screeches, signaling its descent, before it dives towards you at full speed. Your eyes close, you hope death will be quick. 

“Get fucked!” Someone screams, a sickening thud following. Opening your eyes, you see the creature’s body get thrown into the air. Eddie stands above you, smiling wickedly, but as soon as he sees the two other bats gnawing on you, he brings his oar over his head and swings. 

You look away, scared he’ll miss, and see Nancy and Robin a few feet away. Nancy holds the other oar, working with Robin to kill the swarm of bats that encase Steve’s body. Seeing them makes you want to cry in sweet relief. 

The sound of the bats’ pained cries echo in your ears. It takes several attempts before Eddie manages to get them off of you. The bat’s teeth cut deeply with every attack, causing you to cry out in pain. It’s fucking agonizing. Warm blood follows a sickening tearing sensation in your leg.

When Eddie has killed both bats, he helps you stand up. “Jesus, you alright?”

“Talk later,” you grunt, already rushing to go help Nancy and Robin. “Fight now.”

Eddie doesn’t stop you. He swings his oar again and Robin begs you to help. She has a bat pinned down while Nancy pounds her oar into its face, but it won’t fucking die. Its tail has wrapped itself around Steve’s neck and he’s paler than you’ve ever seen him. 

But before you can gut the piece of shit creature, another bat pounces on Nancy. Its claws tear her skin and she yelps. You scream her name and catch her before she falls. “I got you.”

Nancy’s hands clutch your body as you stab the bat. “Get it off me!”

“I’m trying!” The bat won’t let go, screeching with every pull. Biting down, you ignore the searing pain as your palms get cut up even more. Robin tries to help, but you scream at her. “No! Help Steve!”

She nods quickly and it’s a mess of fighting and screeches and blood. Steve bites down on the bat’s tail, its jaw opens as it squeals, giving him just enough time to escape. As he rolls to the side, Robin throws the bat’s body onto the ground. 

Seeing Steve safe reinvigorates you, and with one final scream, you use everything within you to pull the bat off of Nancy’s back. It releases her skin with a squelching pop. You force your knife down its throat and pin the creature to the ground. It writhes beneath you. “Now, Nancy!”

She doesn’t hesitate. “Go to hell!” Her oar slams down, killing it.

Behind you Eddie kills the remaining few bats that circle overhead. Steve stands next to you, slamming the final bat into the ground. The body lands with a loud smack against the concrete and Steve rips the carcass in half. 

Blood drips from his mouth and he messily spits it away. He’s panting, his stomach is on fire, he’s stuck in some alternate dimension with no way out, but all he can focus on is you. 

Flesh hangs from your shoulder, leaving behind a gaping wound of exposed muscle. Your thigh is torn clean through. There’s blood everywhere. The white of your tanktop is now soaked in red. But you’re here, you’re alive. He hasn’t lost you. Not yet, at least.

“Y/N–” Steve practically falls against you, and you’re no better yourself. You’re crying, snot runs down your face as you grab desperately at him. His hands are all over you as he tries to stop the bleeding, but there’s so much blood. 

“I-I’m here.” Your hands are all over Steve’s body, too. They cup his waist, there are so many bite marks on him, but at least his flesh is warm under your skin. He’s still here, he’s still yours, and now all you want to do is calm him down. Steve is panicking, holding you as if he’s afraid you’ll die in his arms any second, and the fear on his face makes your chest ache. 

“Are you guys okay?” Nancy asks, tentatively touching your shoulder. A wince slips from her lips when she sees the flesh that is no longer there. “Jesus, Y/N.”

Steve wraps his hands around your thigh, it’s bleeding the most and you can barely put any weight on it. “I’m fine, but they took a fucking pound of flesh from her.”

“You’re no better,” you’ve placed your own hands over his stomach, his blood warm against your fingers. “I think you lost your appendix.”

Steve laughs, but almost immediately his laugh turns into a groan. “God, don’t make me laugh. It hurts.”

You apologize, kissing his shoulder. Light catches your attention and you see Robin crouched down next to one of the bat carcasses. She looks up at everyone. “Uh, do you guys think these bats have, like, rabies?”

“Robin, if we have rabies, please promise me you’ll shoot me.” You tell her, dead serious. Rabies has always terrified you. When you were younger, a rabid fox made its way onto your grandparents' farm. It had killed all the chickens, attacked the herding dog they had, and you remember how distraught your father had been when he had to kill both the fox and the hound. 

“I’m sure you and Steve don’t have rabies.” Nancy says, sensing your growing fear. But before she can say anything else a small group of bats descend from the sky.

Steve pushes you behind him. They land near the gate you fell through, screeching at the five of you. They’re a small enough group, Steve voices what you’re all thinking: you can handle them. Flicking your knives out, you prepare for what’s about to come. 

Until a swarm grows larger in the distance. There’s easily hundreds of them, they cast a shadow below where they fly. There’s too many to fight. 

“You were saying?” Robin breathes out, eyes never leaving the sky.

Steve is speechless, he doesn’t know what to do. His hand tightens around you, protective, but thankfully Nancy has a plan. She tells everyone to run towards the woods and none of you hesitate to follow. Steve swings your legs over his arms, picking you up with ease despite the bite wounds that litter his skin. Like hell he’s letting you run right now; you’re too torn up, you can hardly even walk. 

As Steve runs with you in his arms, he’s careful to avoid the vines that creep over the ground. It’s a dizzying rush. All you can do is hold tightly onto him, trusting that Nancy knows where she’s taking you. 

Deep into the woods, Nancy calls over her shoulder, “Over here!”

Lifting your head from Steve’s chest, you realize, as you always do, that Nancy Wheeler is a goddamn genius. She’s taken you all to Skull Rock.

The giant boulders form a small alcove, just big enough to hide under as the bats fly overhead. She instructs everyone to crawl under and Steve sets you down gently, positioning you so that you’re sitting with your back against the rock. As soon as you’re secure, Steve’s hand goes back to your thigh.

The sound of the bats is almost deafening. No one dares to speak. They fly over at such a gruesome speed, their screeches echoing off the trees. You lose count of how many there are. All you can do is wait for the last of them to leave.

More lightning strikes above. It shakes the ground, the sound reverberates in your skull. You can’t believe you’re here. You’re in the Upside Down. The place you’ve only ever spoken about, the entity that haunted your nightmares and took the ones you loved from you.

It’s so much colder than you imagined it to be. Everything is darker, more twisted. The dimension is exactly as Will once described to you: this is Hawkins, it’s your home, but different. Colder, scarier. These woods are the woods you walked through, the woods where you fell in love, and yet the trees loom over you in a threatening way. Their branches form spikes, the dirt recoils against your feet. 

Nothing here feels warm. The darkness is never ending. 

This is where Will was, all by himself, for a week. 

He had only been twelve. 

When the nightmare swarm of bats is finally over, Robin carefully pokes her head out from the alcove. “Okay, that was close.”

Eddie agrees, kicking at a rock. Steve offers you his hand to stand, but the moment your skin touches his, you feel sick. All the adrenaline from earlier leaves you. All the blood you’ve lost catches up, leaving your body weak. Stumbling, your vision tunnels and your eyes roll back. 

“Woah, hey.” Steve breaks your fall, snapping his fingers in your face to bring your attention back to him. He’s weak as well, he has to lean heavily against the rock to steady himself. “Y/N-shit!”

“Steve?” Nancy turns around, finding you and him moments away from collapsing. She curses, rushing over. When she sees all the blood that still pours from your thigh, she gags. “Oh, fuck.”

“Keep… keep talking. Please.” Your breathing is labored, you can hardly form any words. “Keep talking to me. If-if I faint… embarrassing.”

“I think she’s losing it.” Eddie whispers rather loudly to Robin. 

Nancy grazes Steve’s chest, silently asking him to move your body aside. She wants to get a closer look at his wounds as well, she can’t help you if he’s bleeding out himself, but he refuses. “No, no we need to help Y/N.”

“Steve, you’re also losing blood–”

“I don’t care.” Steve pulls you even closer to his chest, he needs to feel your rib cage rising and falling. He needs to feel you breathe. “Help her, Nancy.”

His outburst startles Nancy. She takes a step back, alarmed, but clenches her jaw. There’s no getting through to Steve; she knows she’s lost the fight. “At least sit her down.”

Steve collapses, sliding back against the rock with you tucked to his chest. With shaking hands, he forces you to sit next to him. You wince with every movement, it’s getting harder and harder to stay awake.

“Stay with me, angel.” Steve murmurs to you, motioning to Nancy to look down at your thigh. The wound is bleeding the most, the teeth sunk in the deepest. 

“Don’t wanna faint,” your head sags to the side, exhausted. “So embarrassing.”

Nancy places her hands unsurely to your thigh. The blood squelches, soaking through your jeans. She exhales shakily. “You’re not-you’re not going to faint, okay? Just keep talking, Y/N.”

“Hate bats.” It’s the first thing that comes to mind, but it seems to settle Nancy’s unease and Steve’s worry. “Little fuckers hurt.”

Nancy tears the end of her shirt, her nimble fingers gently lift your injured leg. She ties the piece of fabric tight around your thigh, quelling the bleeding. Steve helps with the knot, though really he just needs something to do. 

“If you want some good news, I’m pretty sure wooziness is not a symptom of rabies.” Robin crouches next to you, smiling despite how terrified she is. “So that’s something, right?”

You yelp when Nancy tightens the tourniquet. Biting your tongue, you force a smile to Robin. “Hooray.”

“There,” Nancy wipes her hands of your blood. The tourniquet isn’t much, but already the bleeding has subsided. “But I think you’re going to need stitches.”

“I’m tired of hospitals,” you whine, but you’re already feeling a bit better. You’re weak, sure, but at least your body isn’t slowly draining itself out. “Thanks, though.”

Nancy nods, smiling softly, before her eyes land on Steve’s stomach. “Can I finally patch you up?”

Steve doesn’t even look at her, instead cups your face. Even though you’re covered in blood and sweat and tears, even though your cheek is scabbed and your lip is split, he doesn’t think he’s ever found you more beautiful. “You alright?”

“Been better,” you admit, squeezing his arm. “But let’s worry about you now.” Turning to Nancy, you extend your arm. “Got any more torn pieces of clothing?”

She bites her lip. The only thing covering your body is your tank top. She’s seen the cuts all over your palms. She doesn’t think you’ll be able to wrap the cloth around Steve, if she’s being honest. But she also knows Steve and how fiercely he loves you. He won’t let anyone near him but you. 

Finally, she sighs. Tearing off more of her shirt, she hands it to you. “Yeah, here.”

You thank Nancy again, and she gives you a curt nod before backing away, giving you and Steve some space. Once she’s gone, you tend to Steve’s injuries. When he moves his hand away and reveals raised, angry flesh, you inhale sharply. “Steve…”

“Just a flesh wound.” He jokes, but you can hear the pain in his voice. 

Though you’re still dizzy and weak, you manage to lift Steve’s body enough to wrap the makeshift bandage around him. Luckily he isn’t bleeding as badly as you are, but the sight of him injured still leaves you nauseous. 

Tying the fabric around his torso, you’re careful not to hurt him any more. The moment is familiar, reminiscent of the years before. Back in the junkyard when a Demodog nearly tore open your rib cage, Steve had been the one to take care of you. He had so carefully wrapped your cardigan around your chest, been so delicate with you, and now it’s your turn to do the same for him. 

“We always end up here, don’t we?” You say softly, it still takes a lot of energy for you to speak. You finish tying a knot to secure the bandage and Steve looks at you oddly. He doesn’t understand, and you shrug. “You and me, patching each other’s wounds up.”

Steve’s eyes soften. It doesn’t matter where he could be, in what situation he could be stuck in, you always somehow remind him of how loved he is. “Kinda wish the bats had eaten my ribs instead. We could’ve had matching scars.”

You laugh, eyes shining with tears. Fresh pain explodes all over your body, but you laugh anyways. You don’t know why you’re laughing or why tears run down your face. The exhaustion and pain from today must finally be catching up to you. “How romantic.”

Steve laughs as well, the pain of it bearable when he hears your laughter mixing with his. “I love you, angel.”

“I love you, too, honey.” It’s so cold in the Upside Down, but the warmth of Steve’s love feels like sunshine kissing your skin. 

Robin clears her throat. “Uh, not to ruin this cute moment, but I just wanted to say that if either of you start feeling aggressive, please let me know. Because, ya know. The threat of rabies still.”

“I kinda wanna punch you.” Steve looks at her pointedly, annoyed. 

You poke his cheek and smile apologetically at Robin. “He didn’t mean that.”

“Sense of humor is still intact, that’s a good sign!” She cheers, then, as an afterthought, she takes off her flannel and hands it to you. “Also, figured you’d want this. Not that you aren’t totally hot right now in only a tiny tank top and blood all over you, it’s just freakishly cold down here and you technically have an exposed wound on your shoulder and who knows what sorts of awful flesh eating diseases there are here.” 

You accept the flannel gratefully and thank her. Then, together, you and Steve stand up. The process is difficult, you only have one functional top and bottom, and you walk in a slow manner together as you lean against the other. 

Up ahead, Eddie is standing on one of the boulders, staring out into the vast dimension. “So, uh. This place is like Hawkins, but with monsters and nasty shit?”

“Basically.” You respond, grunting as you support Steve’s upper body. 

Eddie nods, defeated, and before he can step down, Nancy tells him to be careful of the vines. “It’s all a hive mind.”

When Eddie doesn’t understand, Steve tries to explain it to him. “All the creepy crawlies here, dude. They’re like, one or something.”

“They’re all interconnected. They can feel each other’s pain, feelings, whatever.” You say, remembering how Jonathan had described Will’s agonizing screams when the vines had been burned in the tunnels.

“Step on a vine, you’re stepping on a bat, you’re stepping on Vecna.” Steve finishes grimly. 

Eddie smiles sarcastically, obviously displeased with this information, but he’s careful not to step on any vines on his way down. 

“But everything from our world is still here, right? Except people?” Robin asks.

You nod. “According to Will, yeah.”

This pleases Robin, and she starts explaining her plan. If everything's the same in the Upside Down, then you should be able to use the guns stored away at Hawkins’ police station. With the ammunition stored there, it’d be more than enough to kill the bats that guard the gate back to Hawkins. 

“I highly doubt the Hawkins PD has grenades, Robin.” Steve says skeptically. “But guns? Sure.”

You shake your head. While Robin’s idea is good, there’s still the issue of going all the way downtown from Skull Rock. The five of you barely made it half a mile without getting killed. There’s no way you’d survive three. “But the police station is downtown. That’s too far from here.”

Robin deflates, but Nancy furrows her brows. After thinking for a moment, her eyes light up. “We don’t have to go all the way downtown. I have guns. In my bedroom.”

God you love her.

Eddie scoffs in disbelief. “You, Nancy Wheeler, have guns… plural? In your bedroom?”

“Full of surprises, isn’t she?” Robin says with pride.

“And this is why we always listen to her.” You sing along, high fiving Robin. 

Nancy doesn’t acknowledge you or Robin, but her cheeks flush with slight embarrassment. “A Russian Makarov and a revolver.”

“Yeah, you almost shot me with that one.” Steve reminds her, though his tone is gentle, almost teasing.

You laugh, remembering how terrified he had been when Nancy pointed the gun at him. You all had been so much younger, more naive. All he wanted to do was apologize to Jonathan for their fight earlier. Steve had just wanted to make things right, and that’s why you stepped in front of him that night. “Luckily for you, I was there to save your life.” 

Steve looks down at you fondly. He pulls you close, his eyes are full of so much love. He remembers everything. The night that started it all. “And then I saved yours.”

To think that a sprained ankle and a bat full of nails would lead you to here: Steve’s warm chest against you, so full of love.

Lost in your warm memories, neither you nor Steve see Eddie throwing his vest at Steve’s face until it’s too late. The material smacks against him, cruelly bringing the two of you back to reality. 

“What the fuck, Eddie?” You sneer at him, deeply annoyed. 

He waves at you flirtatiously, a devilish glint in his eyes. “I’m protecting your boyfriend’s modesty for you.”

Before you can retaliate, the ground beneath you starts to shake. The force of it is so sudden, so strong, that it sends you and everyone else falling. Steve catches himself on a rock, holding you tightly to his chest, and you manage to catch Nancy before she falls as well. Eddie grabs onto Robin, stuck on the ground together.

The tremors are violent. There’s a cracking sound, branches fall behind you as the earthquake destroys whatever it can. Steve holds you through it, he whispers reassurances to try and calm you. When it’s over everything is quiet for a moment, before a loud, heart stopping shriek cuts into the night.

It doesn’t sound like any creature you’ve faced before. Far too loud to be a Demodog’s, far too large to be a bat’s. The thought of what it could be almost paralyzes you; it could’ve been the Mind Flayer. 

“Guns seem like a pretty good idea to me.” Eddie finally says, panting. 

Robin quickly agrees, and you swallow down the bile that rises in your throat. “Yeah, okay. I can be okay with guns.”

“So what are we waiting for?” Steve puts Eddie’s vest on, twirling a flashlight in his hand. He nods to himself, tries to convince himself that he’s as confident as he sounds. He extends his other arm towards you, helping you steady your balance. “Let’s go.”

And you follow. 

– 

It’s a long walk from Skull Rock to Nancy’s house; it’s an even longer walk when you’re in the Upside Down, hiding from demonic bats. With every branch that snaps beneath someone’s foot, you all jump. The croak of whatever creature nearby sets everyone on edge. 

“Couldn’t we have tried a road or something just slightly less creepy?” Robin complains, jumping over a vine. 

Leaning against Steve, you groan. “Anything would be less creepy than this.”

“I think we’re getting close,” Nancy tries to sound convincing, but even she’s uneasy. “We’re almost out of here. Don’t worry.”

Robin nods at the reassurance, but you can’t help but wonder what could possibly come next after you find Nancy’s guns. It’d be two guns, two critically injured members of the group, two oars, and one switchblade against an army of bats.

Not the best odds. 

Nancy and Robin wander further ahead, leaving you behind with Steve and Eddie. None of you talk, more so because you’re putting all your energy into not falling on your face and Steve is busy helping you stay upright.

Walking is difficult and painful and you’re so frustrated by it all, especially after you trip over your fourth tree root. If it weren’t for Steve’s quick reflexes, you’d be long dead by now.

Eddie must recognize this, too.

“Here, let me just–” He comes next to you and throws your arm over his shoulders before either you or Steve can protest. Immediately the pressure on your injured leg lessens. You sigh in content, and Eddie smirks. “There ya go, princess.”

“Don’t call her that.” Steve snaps, but even he has to admit that Eddie’s help is needed. With him carrying half your weight, Steve is able to breathe a little easier. You’re better balanced this way. He’s no longer straining his injuries to support you. 

Eddie winces. “I’m sorry, just… trying to lighten the mood, I guess.”

Steve doesn’t say anything, but the silence stretches on and you feel bad for Eddie. He really is trying. Despite the fact that he’s Hawkins’ most wanted, he still tries to make everyone else laugh. He has to know that he’s never getting out of this alive, and you admire the strength it must take to continue laughing anyways. 

So you try to for him as well. “Thank you, by the way. You saved our lives back there.”

Eddie looks at you funny, he hadn’t expected you to acknowledge it. “Shit, Steve saved his own ass, man.”

“That’s true,” you laugh. By the time the fight finished, Steve had somehow managed to fight his way out by himself. “It was impressive.”

“No it wasn’t.” 

Eddie scoffs at Steve’s dismissal. “Please, that was a real Ozzy move you pulled back there.”

“Ozzy?” Steve looks at you, silently asking for some type of explanation, but you shrug. 

“All I know is that he’s in Black Sabbath.” Jonathan occasionally listened to the band whenever he was particularly angry, but not enough for you to understand Eddie’s obscure reference. 

Eddie makes a surprised, but pleased, sound. “Honestly surprised you even know Black Sabbath, but c’mon. Ozzy Osbourne, he bit a bat’s head off onstage. You seriously haven’t heard about that?”

You and Steve stare at him blankly, and he sighs. “Well, it was very metal. That’s what I’m trying to say.”

Steve scoffs again, but deep down you know he’s preening. It’s not everyday someone commends his strength or recognizes how well he can hold his own. Steve has come a long way since his first fight with Jonathan back at the alley. 

“I think I finally get why my brother likes you so much,” you tell Eddie, looking up at him curiously. “You know a lot of weird facts. He goes crazy for them.”

That, and you’re finding that Eddie isn’t so bad when he isn’t surrounded by his goonies. He’s actually… decent when he isn’t putting on a show for everyone. It’s almost reminiscent of how Steve had once been, back when he was the King. 

But if you ever pointed out that similarity to the boys, you know they’d be deeply offended. 

The corners of Eddie’s mouth tilt up. “Yeah, well. The kid adores you and practically worships Steve.”

“He does?” Steve almost sounds bashful at the idea of Dustin worshiping him. It makes your heart constrict. You both miss your brother terribly. 

Eddie nods. “Oh yeah, it’s kinda annoying, to be honest. Especially when all he talks about is Y/N. If he isn’t talking about you, he’s talking about her.”

“I doubt that’s true,” you shake your head. “He doesn’t need me anymore, he’s practically counting down the days until I leave.”

“Nah, man. Dustin tells me all the time how much he’ll miss you when you leave.” Eddie tells you, voice firm. “Kid always talks about how much you look out for him, that he doesn’t know what he’ll do when you’re gone. In a way, it’s annoyingly endearing. He frets over you just as much as you fret over him. I can see the Henderson charm in him that made you Hawkins’ sweetheart.” 

Everything that Eddie tells you leaves your throat sticky with tears. You didn’t know, you couldn’t know all Dustin said about you. For the longest time you thought he’d grown to hate you, to resent you the way kids often do with their family. You would’ve never blamed him; sometimes people just grow up, grow apart, but here Eddie is, telling you that your brother will miss you when you’re gone. 

Unable to say anything in fear that you’ll cry, the only response you give Eddie is a curt, short nod.

Steve rubs your side tenderly, understanding all you’re unable to say. Eddie feels the touch against his own side and he clears his throat. He knows you want him to change the subject. “Admittedly, I got a little jealous. Hearing the little shrimp talk about you as if you hung the goddamn stars yourself.” 

The irony of it all crashes upon you. While you had been jealous of Eddie, he had been jealous of you. The two of you spent months quarreling over Dustin, you’d been uncharacteristically mean to Eddie, and yet the entire time you envied the other. 

Abandonment can make people cruel. 

“I was jealous of you, too.” You finally reveal to Eddie, meeting his eyes for the first time tonight. 

Eddie stares back at you, his expression softens with understanding. He seems to have pieced together what you have: your anger had never been cruel, only defensive. Protective of your brother the way only a sister would in fear of losing him. 

“Guess that makes us both idiots, huh?” Eddie teases gently, accepting the offering of truce that you present to him. 

You laugh, looking away. The moment of truce is nice, pleasant almost, until the beat of silence becomes too unbearable for you. You’ve revealed enough of yourself tonight. Awkwardly clearing your throat, you lift your arm from Eddie’s shoulder and pull away. “Robin is probably missing me right now. She hates the dark, these woods are her worst nightmare.”

Steve catches your arm before you leave. You’re still unsteady on your feet, but he understands what you’re trying to do. He’s come to learn that you shut away when you’re vulnerable. While you wear your heart on your sleeve, Steve knows that it can be exhausting for you. 

“Need me to call her over?” He asks you quietly.

“No, I can manage.” You kiss Steve’s cheek, thanking him without having to say it. Eddie smiles at you as you leave, tight lipped, but kind nonetheless. 

The two teens watch you slowly make your way over to Robin, who happily welcomes your presence. She wraps her arms around you and holds you tightly, giggling slightly, before holding you close and helping you walk. 

“I’ll bring her back in one piece!” Robin calls to Steve, giggling under her breath. Steve waves his hand sarcastically, but doesn’t argue. Turning to you, Robin’s face shines in the blue moonlight. “You here to save me from this totally creepy, absolutely horrid woods?”

“Duh,” your laughter reflects hers. “I’m your knight in shining armor, babe.”

Robin squeezes your hand, resting her head against yours as you walk together. It’s been a long time since you’ve held each other like this. The realization makes you guilty. “How’ve you been holding up?”

Robin shrugs, the motion jostles your head, but you don’t mind. “We’re in the Upside Down, some guy named Vecna wants you and Max dead, and you refuse to admit that you’re scared.”

You bite your lip. Robin is just as worried for you as Steve is, she’s just hidden it better, and you wish that you could spare her the worry. She’s put up such a strong front for you. Between Steve, Dustin, Lucas, and Max, Robin knew you didn’t want yet another person coddling you.

So she stepped back, gave you the space you wanted, but you’re still her best friend. Robin won’t let you forget that.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper to her, holding onto her as tightly as she holds onto you. 

Robin shrugs again. “Nothing to forgive, pretty girl.”

And it’s as simple as that.

Though Steve can’t hear your conversation, he watches you and Robin fondly. The two of you sway together, laughing occasionally. Eddie notices the way Steve looks at you and laughs to himself. 

“You know, I was jealous of you, too.”

Steve raises his eyebrow. “What?”

“I was jealous of you and Henderson, the little one, I mean. Guess I couldn’t accept the fact that Steve Harrington was actually a good dude. I mean, rich parents, popular, chicks love him, not a douche? No way dude. That like, flies in the face of all laws in the universe and my own personal Munson doctrine.”

Then Eddie motions towards you. “And when you started dating Y/N? C’mon, man. Everyone knows Y/N Henderson is like, God’s gift to selflessness. I watched her tutor kids in the library like goddamn Gandhi, and suddenly she’s dating you? There isn’t any law in the universe to explain that. Fucking unfair.”

Though he knows he should be offended, Steve finds himself laughing. If he’s being honest, he’s relieved that someone else is questioning whether Steve deserves you. From the moment he met you, you’ve tried convincing him that he’s always deserved you. But Steve knows better, and he can’t believe it’s Eddie Munson who sees this, too. 

“If it makes you feel any better, I also don’t know why Y/N chose me.” Steve confesses, catching Eddie’s attention. “Honestly, I don’t think I ever would’ve been someone she even liked had we not been dragged into the Upside Down together. I was a douchebag. She hated me for years, but I guess saving her life a few times earned me some brownie points.” 

Eddie snorts. “Surprised you’re not claiming it was your ‘stunningly good looks’ that made Y/N fall for you. Oh how humble you’ve become.”

“Y/N changed me.” Steve’s eyes find your body again. They will always draw towards you no matter where you are.

The sincerity in Steve’s voice surprises Eddie. Licking his lips, he sighs. “Well whatever she did, I never would’ve jumped in that lake to save your ass, not under any normal circumstances.” A branch snaps, Steve and Eddie turn to its source, but there’s nothing there. Sighing again, Eddie continues to walk. “Outside of DnD, I’m no hero. I see danger and I just turn heel and run… at least, that’s what I’ve learned about myself this week.”

Steve doesn’t know where Eddie is going with this. “Hey, give yourself a break, man.”

Eddie points to you, Robin, and Nancy walking up ahead. “No, you see. The only reason I came in here was ‘cause those ladies came in straight after you. I was too ashamed to be the one who stayed behind. But Y/N? She dove in the second your head went under. Nearly tore Robin’s arm off trying to get to you.”

Something heavy settles in Steve’s chest. There’s a shift, there’s something that simmers deep into his rib cage. 

Eddie forces Steve to look at him. “I don’t know how you did it, but she loves you. The way she was screaming your name, it was an unambiguous sign of true love that these cynical eyes have ever seen. And if someone like Y/N Henderson loves you… then I figured you must be worth saving.”

Steve’s breath stutters. He looks up at you again, the warmth that cascades his veins whenever he sees you overwhelms him. Steve loves you more than anything. To be told how deeply you love him by someone else is almost too much. 

You and Steve have been fighting so much recently. He’s said awful things to you, you’ve hurt him in ways he hadn’t known he could hurt. All the unspoken words, all the uncertainty and fear, and yet you dove in to save Steve without hesitating. 

And isn’t that all that love is? To love without expectations, without hesitancy. Love is the inability to separate your breath from the person’s lungs; you took all the air out of Steve’s chest the moment you smiled at him. 

You’re the best goddamn thing that has ever happened to Steve. He’s always known this, he’s always known that what the two of you have is special. It’s something more than just young love. 

So what if the future you envision doesn’t align with Steve’s? How could something so small, so miniscule as compared to forever with you, be what Steve allows to drive you away? You deserve more than just his insecurities. You’ve already decided that Steve deserves your love, what more can he want from you?

He already has you; Steve won’t let you walk away from him. Not this time, not when what you have is rare and real and raw. 

Steve almost wants to laugh at how funny it is. He’d been so worried about losing you, that he almost lost you in the process. What’s even worse: it took a five minute conversation with fucking Eddie Munson to even realize it. 

“Y/N, she’s–” Steve begins, but the ground starts to shake again and he’s falling. Eddie curses, sick of these earthquakes, and Steve braces himself as the rumbling continues. 

Robin struggles to hold onto you as you cower together under the earth’s violent shaking. Instinctively your head turns toward Steve to make sure he’s okay. You find him on the ground next to Eddie. Sensing your eyes on him, Steve looks up and nods reassuringly at you. Relieved, you breathe against Robin. 

“Second on my list of least favorite things,” she says, voice shaking. “Earthquakes. Seriously, I’m unsteady enough as it is.”

“At least you have two working legs.” You quip.

Robin shushes you, but her voice raises when she sees Nancy stand and take off. “Nancy!”

Squinting at the darkness, you see the girl’s figure disappearing into the treeline. She’s running alarmingly fast, way too fast for anyone to catch up in time, and your heart lurches. None of you should be splitting up right now. It isn’t safe. “Fuck! Someone stop her!”

Robin quickly throws you onto your feet and you call after Steve and Eddie to follow. If running was difficult with a bleeding out leg, it’s almost impossible with the ground shaking beneath you. But if Nancy’s in trouble, you need to get to her as soon as you can. Leg be damned.

Breaking through the treeline, you find her standing at the edge of a clearing. There are fallen trees everywhere. Red lightning illuminates the Wheeler house before you. By some miracle, you’ve made it.

“Come on.” Nancy breaks the silence, chin held high. She isn’t giving up now, not when you’re all so close. 

She starts to walk, never looking back, and you look at Steve. He grabs your hand. You take a deep breath. You fucking hope Nancy’s plan works. 

This is your only chance of going home.

– 

The Wheeler house is exactly how you remember it, only vines and debris maims its usually pristine appearance. Nancy walks through the door first while Steve shines a flashlight. Particles float everywhere. You try not to think about the fact that you’re inhaling them.

Your foot catches on a stray vine, its tendrils flail angrily at you. Stomping your foot away, you look wearily at Nancy. “Love the decor.”

She rolls her eyes while Robin echoes you. “Might be time to get a maid, Wheeler.”

Ignoring the two of you, Nancy ushers everyone upstairs. While her voice is level, the unease in her body is apparent. She doesn’t like seeing her home this way. Sympathetic, you start to follow Nancy, but for a split second you think you hear Dustin’s voice.

It’s faint, mostly incoherent, and you think you’ve finally gone crazy. That’s it. Vecna has won, you’ve lost the remaining sanity you had left. 

But then Steve suddenly freezes next to you. His bewilderment tells you that he hears Dustin, too. That’s your brother. You’d know his nasally voice anywhere.

Sharing a look with Steve, you simultaneously begin running around the house, trying to follow the sound of Dustin’s voice. You remember Will telling you how he could hear Joyce’s cries for him while he’d been trapped in the Upside Down. It had been the only way Joyce could communicate with him. What if this is the same?

“Start screaming,” you command Steve, limping over to one of the walls. 

“I’m sorry?”

“It’s what Will did, he-he screamed for his mom and Joyce was able to hear him.” You press our mouth close to the wall and shout, “Dustin!” 

He has to hear you. You don’t know what you’ll do if he doesn’t.

Steve wastes no time following along, screaming Dustin’s name at the top of his lungs as well. You know the two of you must look like complete idiots, but you’re desperate.

“Dustin! Dustin Henderson you have five seconds to answer me!” You yell, throat burning.

“Hello? Answer us!” Steve stands in the center of the kitchen, crouched down as if getting ready to bolt. 

This is how Nancy, Robin, and Eddie find you. The three of them stare at you and Steve in concern, though none of them want to get any closer. Robin ducks her head down, whispers, “Maybe they really do have rabies.”

“What are you guys doing?” Nancy demands, fed up. 

“He’s here,” Steve whips his flashlight around, facing them. “Henderson. That little shit, he’s here. He’s like-he’s in the walls or something. Just listen.”

Dustin, predictably, is quiet the moment Steve tells everyone to listen. 

You pound on the wall. “Oh, now you’re quiet?” Everyone looks at you skeptically and you rub your face tiredly. “Look, I know this all sounds crazy, but I can hear Dustin, alright? It’s him.”

“Dustin!” Steve continues to screech, not helping your whole “we aren’t crazy” argument. 

Only Dustin’s voice returns, and thankfully Nancy and everyone else hears it. Together you all search the house, calling your brother’s name out. Yet now matter how loud you scream, he doesn’t respond.

“Alright, either this kid can’t hear us or he’s being a total douchebag.” Steve drops his flashlight.

You blow hair out of your face. “Normally he’s a douchebag, but not nearly to this extent.”

Nancy stands next to you. “But Will found a way to make Joyce listen.”

“When Joyce couldn’t hear him anymore, she used the Christmas lights.” You look at her. “Do you think…?”

She’s already running to the nearest lamp in the kitchen. Flicking the switch, nothing happens. You suggest trying a different light, though you know it won’t make a difference. When the lights remain unlit, you slam your palm against the table in frustration. 

“Guys?” Steve gets your attention. He’s shining his flashlight at the chandelier that hangs over the Wheeler’s dining table. “You seeing this?”

Where Steve points his flashlight, a warm, evanescent glow emits from the chandelier. You gasp at its beauty, you’ve never seen anything like it. Nancy steps towards the light and slowly puts her hand into the loose waves that flow between the lights. It’s encased in small orbs that float gently into the air. 

Nancy’s fingers dance in the light. A path of gold leaves a trail where her fingers have been. The particles in the light surround her hand, pulled in by her presence. Breathless, you reach out as well. The light kisses your hand, and the sensation is soft, almost ticklish. 

“This is insane,” you murmur in awe, face illuminated. You never thought you’d encounter beauty in such a place as the Upside Down. But at least Will found the beauty, too. “This must be how Will did it.”

Robin, Steve, and Eddie copy you and Nancy, putting their hands into the light as well. The five of you twirl your fingers around, causing the light to flicker with every movement. 

Steve’s pinky reaches for yours. “It… tickles?” 

“It kinda feels good.” Mumbles Robin, making figure 8’s with her finger. 

Nancy then lowers her hand and asks if anyone knows morse code. She mostly looks at you when you ask, and you bitterly tell her no. You’d think after everything you and the party have been through, you’d at least learn morse code by now. 

“Wait, does SOS count?” 

Eddie’s stupid question makes you hit his chest. “Of course it counts!”

“Ow!” He shoves you away from him, straightening his leather jacket. “A ‘yes” would’ve sufficed.”

Nancy shushes the two of you and instructs Eddie to start typing out the code. With a huff, he listens, and soon he begins the pattern for SOS. A soft buzz accompanies every flicker of the light. With each letter combination, you can practically feel Dustin getting closer and closer to you. 

It’s almost an indescribable feeling. Somewhere, in another universe, Dustin is standing right where you are. You aren’t sure how you know, maybe you’ll never be able to find the right words, but your brother’s presence settles over your own. 

This must be how Jonathan felt when Joyce was in the Upside Down. He whispered her name so softly when he followed her with the lights. Their love for one another tethered them; now it’s your love for Dustin that tethers him to you. 

“Dustin,” his name comes out whispered, relieved. He’s okay, you can feel that he’s safe. 

“Y/N?” Dustin’s muffled shouting fills everyone with relief. Steve and Eddie high five, Nancy lets out the breath she’d been holding, and Robin cheers while you hastily wipe your eyes. The SOS worked. “Is that-is that you?”

“Yes!” Steve screams into the chandelier, though you know your brother won’t be able to hear.

Anxious to get to Dustin as fast as you can, you shove your hands into the chandelier’s light and send a long, bright beam of light. More muffled screaming can be heard on the other side, only this time laughter accompanies it.

“Holy shit!” Dustin exclaims in awe. The amazement in his voice makes you miss him even more. There’s a murmur of other voices, you can only assume one of them is Lucas’, before Dustin shouts even louder, “We’re gonna find you a better light source. Don’t move.”

You roll your eyes. “Like we can go anywhere else.”

Dustin leaves again, but he’s back within minutes. Through loud screaming, he tells you to find Holly’s Lite Brite and go to Nancy’s room. Him and Lucas will meet the rest of you there. 

The moment Dustin leaves again, Nancy shoves everyone upstairs. “I’ll find the light pad, the rest of you go. Now.” 

And that’s how you find yourself restlessly staring at a child’s light up toy on Nancy Wheeler’s bed with Steve’s chest pressed against your back. He leans close to the toy, mumbling under his breath, “Come on, little Henderson.”

The Lite Brite suddenly comes to life. You throw your hands up triumphantly, giddy. “Yes!”

“You guys seeing this?” Dustin asks, to which Nancy responds by putting her hand into the light. Dustin squeals in excitement. This must be a scientific dream for him. “Okay, we’re not moving it, but we’re gonna unplug it. Stand by.”

The light fades away and Dustin prompts someone to spell something. Everyone turns to you. He’s your brother, you should be the one to make first contact. 

Carefully, you use your pointer finger to spell out D.U.S.T.

Eddie cocks his head. “‘Dust’?”

“He’ll understand.” 

When your mom first brought Dustin home from the hospital, he’d been so small. Immediately you fell in love with the small baby, but his size had confused you. You’d never seen anything so tiny before. 

“He’s small,” you informed your father, making a face at the yawning baby before you. “Like dust.”

You were only three, but you can still remember the way your dad had laughed. For years afterwards you never referred to Dustin by his actual name. He was only ever “Dust” to you. Your father joined, the nickname stuck, though your mother came to prefer “Dusty.”

It was only after your father left that you stopped calling your brother Dust. 

“Dust!” Dustin laughs excitedly. “I’m Dust! Yes!” He raises his voice louder, he can’t believe you remembered the old childhood nickname. “That worked, guys!”

Everyone cheers, Eddie even throws in his own enthusiastic “hi” to the Lite Brite. Your face aches from how hard you smile. Turning the toy over to Nancy, you nod at her. “All yours, Wheeler.”

Her eyebrows knit together as she thinks for a moment. There’s so much to tell Dustin and the others, but the Lite Brite is small and too many words to keep track of. “What should I write?”

“‘Help’ would be a pretty good place to start.” You suggest to her. 

Instead, Nancy ends up spelling “stuck”. Which is pretty fitting, all things considered. Gets the message across well. 

“You can’t get back through Watergate?”

Steve questions whatever the hell watergate is and Robin has to explain the wordplay. While she does so, pride swells deep within your chest. “Dustin’s a little genius that I love so much.”

“It was pretty clever.” Eddie admits. 

Nancy tells Dustin that the gate you all came through is guarded. However, never missing a beat, Dustin tells you that he thinks they have a theory that can help. “We think Watergate isn’t the only gate, that there’s one at every murder site.”

You jerk your head up, eyes widening. It all makes sense now. “Wait, I think he’s–”

“Does anyone have any idea what he’s talking about?” Nancy asks tiredly. Everyone gives her equally tired no’s, but you nod viciously.

“Yes! We already know there’s multiple gates, we just didn’t know how, but Dustin might’ve figured it out. It’s all connected to the murders.”

Nancy looks skeptical. “I don’t know…” Before you can argue with her, she sends a “?” back to Dustin. 

Who, predictably, doesn’t take it well. “Seriously? How many times do I have to be right on the money before you guys just trust me?”

Steve grimaces. “Jesus Christ. This kid’s gotta get his ego checked out.” 

“It’s his tone, right?” Eddie butts in.

You shove them both. “Shut up. Both of you. Dustin can be annoying and frustrating, but he’s right. He’s always been right. Now if you guys would actually listen, he’ll get us out of here.”

Looking pointedly at everyone, you start to explain. “There was a gate in Lover’s Lake, which we obviously found,” your arms wave behind you. “The same lake where Patrick died. Now, where else has a dead body been found?”

“Eddie’s trailer,” Nancy straightens, understanding where you’re going with this. Looking at Eddie, she asks him how far it is. 

“Seven miles.” 

Your head drops. “Why couldn’t you have lived closer?”

“I’m sorry I’m… poor?” Eddie looks at you incredulously. 

You flick a dismissive hand at him, but Robin cuts in between you two. “Nancy, I know your house here is, like, weirdly, creepily frozen in time and shit–”

“It’s what?” Obviously you missed some important details. 

Robin holds her hand up. “I’ll explain later. Anyways, haven’t you always had bikes?”

You and Nancy share a look, both thinking the same thing: the bikes would be perfect. That, and they’re kinda your only option at the moment. 

– 

Since you’re in no condition to bike (your thigh has only just stopped bleeding) and there’s only four bikes anyways, Steve has you wrap your arms around his chest and stand on his pegs. He claims it’s so that you can avoid putting any weight on your leg, but you honestly think he just wants you to hold him. Pressing your body close to his, you look around at the houses you pass.

In a strange, twisted way, it’s exhilarating biking through an Upside Down Hawkins. Everything, and yet nothing, is the same. The houses you pass are frozen in time, empty, ghostly. Robin, Nancy, and Eddie bike alongside you and Steve. The scene is almost reminiscent of the night you biked Will home, wind in your hair and the night sky before you. 

Everything has changed since then.

Somewhere along the route to Eddie’s, you bike past the Creel house. Your arms tighten instinctively around Steve. A chill runs through you, the house is just as haunting in the Upside Down as it is back in your universe. Your head throbs being so close to it, as if warning you, but Steve is turning into Eddie’s neighborhood before you can think much else of it. 

“That’s gotta be a Guinness World Record.” Robin throws her bike down, breathless. “Most miles traveled interdimensionally.”

Steve coughs, swatting at the particles in the air. “Just inhaled a bunch of that crap.”

“I’ve been trying not to think about how much of the Upside Down we’ve ingested since being here.”

“It’s stuck in my throat, Y/N.”

“Again, I’m trying not to think about that.”

Eddie opens his trailer door and, just as Dustin predicted, there’s a gate. It’s just like the one in Lover’s lake had been: illuminating red light, vines all around its edges. An open wound. 

“This is where Chrissy died.” Eddie stares up at the gate, which resides in the ceiling. He swallows heavily. “Like, right where she died.”

“I’m sorry.” Your hand finds Eddie’s arm. You don’t know much about what their relationship had been, but he seems to have cared about the girl a lot. 

Eddie gives you a tight lipped smile, his eyes shining slightly. As he looks at you, Robin sees something moving in the gate. “I think there’s something in there.”

Something starts to protrude from it, causing the gate to swell rapidly. The vines almost seem to snarl at the intrusion. An ominous, unsteady croak emits from the gate. The sound sets your nerves on edge and Steve shoves you behind him protectively. Hand on your knives, you raise them, bracing. 

The gate explodes, spewing liquid and vines everywhere. You all scream, jumping back, as something rips through the membrane-like material. Unable to tell what’s just happened, you squint up at the ceiling.

Nothing jumps out at you, no bats come to feast on your flesh. Finding Steve’s eye, you silently ask him if you should walk closer. Nodding, he grabs your hand, and together you creep towards the remains of the gate.

When you look up, you find Dustin’s smug, joyous face staring back at you. Only he’s upside down with Max, Lucas, and Erica, all just as in shock as you are.

You’ve never been more relieved to see them in your life. Dropping your hands to your knees, you bend over and finally breathe. “Oh, thank God.”

“No way…” Steve waves at them, and they wave right back. “Hi.”

“Dustin!” If your leg wasn’t hanging by a thread, you’d be jumping up and down right now. Instead, you opt for waving like a madman at your brother. The entire situation is so fucking bizarre, but you don’t even care anymore. “You did it!”

“I did it!” Dustin giggles. “Bada bada boom!”

After some heated discussions and a few arguments, Dustin and the others come up with a way to get the five of you out of the Upside Down. Using Eddie’s bed sheets as a makeshift rope had been the easy part. What caused nearly a fist fight between Max and Dustin had been figuring out a soft landing pad for you guys. 

“I, uh. Have a mattress?” Eddie finally suggested when he noticed Max’s fist clenching. 

She glared at him. “Why didn’t you say anything sooner?”

“Well, I mean. It’s-uh. Minor details?”

But none of them had time to question Eddie’s sudden shyness regarding his mattress. Dustin got straight to work tying the bed sheets together while Max and Lucas worked on dragging the mattress out of Eddie’s room. 

However, the moment it landed on the ground, all eyes went to the giant stains on the bed. Cringing in disgust, you eye Eddie.

Seeing your disapproving look, he swallows. “Those stains are, uh…” He tries to come up with an excuse, but eventually he realizes it’s better to just accept defeat. “I don’t know what those stains are.”

“Would we want to know even if you knew?” You ask him, already knowing the answer.

“... Probably not.”

Dustin tosses the bed sheet rope up, or rather down, through the gate. “Not quite sure how these physics are gonna work, but here goes nothing.”

Miraculously, it lands perfectly in front of you. Dustin tugs at the rope before letting go of it completely. You gasp. The rope stands on its own, stiff but secure, and Dustin lets out a pleased laugh. “Abracadabra.”

“I’ve never understood physics.” You say, pulling at the rope. It doesn’t move. “But even I can admit that this is cool.”

Dustin high fives Erica and Robin steps up first. “Guess I’m the guinea pig.”

“Please be careful.” You tell her, already dreading your own ascent. Your shoulder still aches and you were never the best at climbing the rope for gym. You preferred soccer, track, anything that involved leg coordination. Not upper body. 

Robin slowly climbs up, and when her body hits the disgusting mattress back in your dimension, you let out a breath of relief. “That was kinda fun,” Robin giggles slightly.

Then Eddie stares at you, Steve, and Nancy. He waits for someone to move, obviously not wanting to be next. But when no one does, he shakes his head. “Alright, I guess I’ll go.”

Steve holds the rope steady and Eddie falls onto his mattress safely. He sits up, exhilarated. “That was fun.” He echoes Robin. 

Steve gestures for Nancy to go next. “I’ll help Y/N up after you’re done.”

She gives him an uncertain look, eyeing your injuries, and you try to smile at her reassuringly. “Go, I’ll be fine. Promise.”

Knowing it’s as good of an answer she’ll get from you, Nancy takes a deep breath. “See you on the other side.”

You grab her waist and help hoist her up alongside Steve. She’s swift, her strength impresses you. She’s almost reached the top before you hear the first chime. 

It’s loud, deafening. The chime of a grandfather clock.

Another chime follows, then a third, a fourth. It wracks your skull with its force. 

You turn, gasping, expecting to find the grandfather clock that Max had seen in her vision. Only you’re met with darkness. You can’t see anything, you can’t find a way out. You can’t feel Steve next to you, your hands try to find his in the dark, but all they’re met with is air. 

“What–” Panic chokes you. None of this is right, you don’t know where you are, you don’t know what’s happening and you can’t feel Steve and–

The sensation of sunlight kissing your face stops you. 

Your eyes open. You’re no longer in Eddie’s trailer. 

You’re outside, there’s sunshine all around you. In front of you is a field of dandelions, their sweet yellow reflects the gold of the sun above. The grass beneath your feet is soft, lush and green. A bee flies past your head and someone calls your name.

You’ve been here before. In the distance resides a small house on a hill. The blue door and white frames of your childhood home welcomes you. You’re back in Virginia. Someone calls your name again.

The voice is familiar. 

It’s your father, calling you home. 

The realization knocks all the air out of your lungs. None of this is real. You know it isn’t real, but to hear your father’s voice, so sweet and saccharine again, it makes you weak. But it isn’t real. Your legs begin to move, you’re running before you can think of anything else. 

This is a vision. The scent of oak trees and strawberries isn’t real. The wheat that skims your thighs as you run doesn’t exist. “This is a vision,” you try to talk to yourself, your fingers dig into your pockets for your walkman. 

You know you’re supposed to always have it on you, that’s what Dustin told you, but there’s nothing there. Panic swells within your chest once more. “No, please–”

Distracted as you look for your walkman, you don’t see the body in front of you.

Colliding into your father, he steadies you. “Woah, there.”

His calloused hands are rough and familiar. He’s laughing, his voice is the same gruff voice that used to sing you to sleep. Your father looks down at you and your entire body freezes when your eyes meet his. 

You haven’t seen him ever since you were twelve. He looks the same as the day he left. His smile is the same, the crooked teeth charming. Your father’s nose still points up ever so slightly. The only indication that he’s aged are the wrinkles that line his face, years of sunlight etching them. 

But it’s his eyes that hurt you the most. They’re still kind. 

“What are ya runnin’ from, ladybug?” Your father asks you, his southern drawl liquid honey to your ears. 

Tears build within you hearing the childhood nickname. You were his ladybug for as long as you could remember. When he used to call, he’d whisper the name over the phone as an apology for everything he’d done to you. 

Because you can’t help it, because you’ll never be able to do this again, you hug your father. He lets out a soft chuckle at the impact, his arms hold you as they’ve always done. Your face buries itself into his rough t-shirt.

You’re a little girl who needs her daddy right now. 

“I.. I missed you, daddy.” Voice breaking, you begin to cry. 

Your father’s palm rests against your hand. He hums, soothing the ache in your bones. “You know you can never outrun it.”

The words unsettle you, there’s something about them that causes you to pull away. “Outrun what–?” “The guilt, ladybug. It will always find you.” Your father’s smile twists into a sickening grimace. The muscles in his face conjoin, his eyes darken as his voice becomes gravel. Deeper. Until it isn’t your father’s voice anymore, but someone else's. “I will always find you.”

Too late do you realize that it’s Vecna who now has you. You start to scream, thrashing in your father’s arms to escape, but he only grips you harder. He’s laughing, but it’s no longer your father’s laughter. 

Suddenly you’re thrown into the lake behind you. You fall, screaming, as you descend deep into a pitch black void. Your arms reach out, you try to find anything to grab onto, but there’s nothing. It’s just endless emptiness. 

You land harshly on your back, all the air gone. You gasp, choke on whatever air remains in your body. The impact leaves you coughing, clawing at the ground beneath you to breathe. Soil scrapes under your nails, your palm gets cut on a root.

You’re in the woods. 

Scrambling to sit up, you realize you’re in the same part of the woods that Will went missing in. Fear cuts through your veins. Why would Vecna take you here?

“Will?” You’re on your feet now, cupping your hands over your mouth as you shout his name. Does Vecna have him? Have you lost him again? “Will!”

“He needed you that night.” Vecna’s voice taunts you, the sound like rocks grinding together. “Where were you?”

You’re running now. Branches cut your face as you break through them. You have to find Will. You can’t lose him again. You can’t do that to Jonathan, to Joyce and El and Dustin and Mike and everyone else. You’re the one who lost Will that night.

He had needed you. Isn’t that what Vecna said?

“Nancy!” Sobbing, you call for someone, anyone. But no one answers. Your vision blurs with tears, there’s someone running behind you. Chasing you. Terrified, you scream for the person you need the most. “Steve!”

Saying his name must trigger something, because suddenly the scene changes. You’re no longer in the woods. You’re on the ledge of someone’s roof, overlooking a window sill. A large, bay window that you’ve spent countless slow mornings residing on. 

Steve’s house. 

He’s standing in front of his bed, facing the window, facing you, but he doesn’t look at you. Not how he always does; his gaze lacks warmth. 

“Steve!” You pound on the glass, you try desperately to get him to acknowledge you, but he doesn’t. His eyes are on Nancy, who sits on the bed before him. He leans down, brushes her hair out of her face, before bridging the distance between them.

You watch as Steve kisses Nancy. He cups her chin the way he cups yours. Bile rises in your throat; you can’t turn away. Their kisses become heated, Steve is tugging at Nancy’s hair and her clothes. She tugs at him as well, he helps her remove his shirt.

Nancy’s lips trace the expanse of Steve’s neck and his eyes, once closed in bliss, now open. He looks right at you. 

“Did you really think I’d forget her, Y/N?” His voice digs into your ears. Nancy nips at his neck and he moans. He throws his head back, looks at you again. “I can’t. At least, not as easily as your dad forgot you.”

You stumble back, crying so hard you can barely breathe. Steve laughs seeing your heartbroken reaction. It’s cruel and awful. He’s cold. You’ve never known his voice to hold so much malice. Not towards you. Not towards anyone. 

He’s wrong. Steve doesn’t love Nancy, not anymore. Vecna is the one saying this, you know it isn’t Steve. He would never say any of this to you, he could never be so cruel to you. He loves you. You know he does. 

“N-no! This isn’t-this isn’t real–”

But the hatred in Steve’s eyes causes your foot to catch on the edge of the roof. You don’t have time to catch yourself; your body is weightless again, only this time it’s a much shorter fall. You land on concrete. Ripping your eyes open, there are domed walls around you. 

Nancy stands above you. 

Hyperventilating, you crawl away from her. You’re in Steve’s pool, only it’s empty, infested with vines, and your fingers stain the ground with blood. Everything in your body is screaming at you to run.

“Y/N–” Nancy tries to stop you, but you scream at her, kicking. She only barely avoids your fury. Holding her hands up, she lowers her voice, softens it. She’s crying, her terror the same as yours. “Y/N, it’s me, okay?”

Your body trembles with exhaustion. You close your eyes, tired of fighting. “Please be real.”

“I’m real.” Nancy swears to you, carefully reaching for you. When you allow her touch, she helps you stand up. 

The memory of her having sex with Steve is burned into your mind. You can’t look Nancy in the eye. She breathes heavily next to, looking around for a way out, when she sees something. A strangled cry leaves Nancy’s lips.

Barbara Holland’s corpse sits on the other side of the pool.

You cover your mouth with a gasp, choking slightly at the sight. Nancy cries out in pain, in grief, seeing her best friend’s body dismembered by vines. You stumble towards Nancy and hold her as she sobs. 

“Do you remember what you did, Nancy? Or have you already forgotten?” Vecna’s voice shakes the pool. “Don’t worry, I showed Y/N. When I kill someone… I never forget.”

A sob collapses in your chest. Barb’s death hadn’t been Nancy’s fault. Yet to place her in the same pool Barb was killed in, to show Nancy her corpse, is unrelenting cruelty. 

All around you, blood pours from the vents of the pool. It comes out quick, thick, at a dizzying speed. Nancy tugs at your hand and practically throws you up the ladder to escape. But when you reach the top, you’re met with a red hell.

It’s exactly how Max drew it.

Fragments of stairs, jagged pieces of wood, a grandfather clock, they all drift through the air painted with blood-red. Somewhere there’s screaming, the sound only drowned out by lightning. A clock ticks over and over again. Its metronome is maddening.

Nancy holds your hand and neither one of you lets go. Having nowhere else to go, you’re forced to walk down the stairs you arrived at. The clock chimes again and your heart stops.

“I see you’ve been looking for me, Nancy. And Y/N…” Vecna pauses, preying on you. “I’ve been watching you for quite some time.”

Everything stops.

“All the guilt, all the pain.” 

It comes to you in flashes. 

How Will used to smile at you, before his childhood was taken from him. Max’s blue eyes, shining with youth and happiness, before grief killed her. Billy, how he would be kind to your mother at the pool. Hopper, the way you’d bicker with him just to get him to smile.

It’s all gone because of you; you can’t remember how to breathe. 

Vecna feeds on your fear. “How fragile you’ve become… like a dandelion.” 

The wording, it’s too specific to not mean anything. Dandelions were once one of your favorite flowers. Before a nightmare from last summer changed everything. The dandelions had filled your mouth with razors and choked you. Someone called your name in the distance, they’d been too late to save you.

The dream had felt so real. You’d woken up with tears in your eyes.

And now you know it had been Vecna all along. Even back then. He’s been watching you for far longer than you realized. The realization chokes you, the fear overwhelms you. He’s been here all along.

Nancy yanks at your arm, you can barely hear her over the roaring in your head. “Y/N, listen to my voice.” 

She’s shaking you, trying to bring you back to her, but you’re lost. Hyperventilating, you struggle to catch your breath. You feel too vulnerable. Raw. Exposed. There are corpses strung up by vines in front of you. Fred’s broken jaw. Chrissy’s snapped neck. Patrick’s empty eye sockets. 

The same will happen to you. 

You’ve spent so long trying to be strong, trying to keep everyone safe. You’ve devoted your entire life to protecting others, helping them. But Vecna has been watching you for almost an entire year, maybe even longer, and you hadn’t noticed.

It’s why he’s targeted Max. He watched you take care of everyone you loved. Vecna watched you raise the girl. He knew it’d hurt you the most to lose her. It hadn’t been a coincidence. It’s all your fault. It’s always your fault. Will went missing because of you. Billy died because you hadn’t said anything. Max will die because you hadn’t seen the signs sooner. 

Nancy’s screams fall deaf on your ears. She shakes you, begs you to come back, but why should you?

This is all your fault. 

It’s always your fault. 

It’s always your fault. It’s always your fault. It’s always your fault. It’s always–

You feel your body lift. 

Everything fades to black.

-

⌑ series masterlist

⌑ i am no longer doing a taglist, my apologies ! however, please feel free to like, reblog, and comment instead :)

[matty-bear]

Heyy! I was wondering if I could request a sturniolo triplets x sister reader. She’s like 17/18 and they are doing a podcast episode with her, and they talk about childhood stories and maybe she plays football or something, or is really into art. Just an idea… love you fics btw!

A Trip Down Memory Lane

type: request ! 

pairing: sturniolo x little sister 

warnings: sfw, fluffy, lighthearted sibling banter 

summary: the triplets invite you to join one of their podcast episodes ! cue in the bickering and childhood memories 

notes: hope this is what you were wanting ^^ writing this was sm fun ! had a little trouble figuring out the childhood memories but i think i got the bickering down 🔥 happy reading ! hope you enjoy <3 

WC: 3425 

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“Good morning Campers and welcome back to the Cut The Camera Podcast!” Nick greets, a small smile toying at his lips as he looks at the camera before him. “It’s your favorite host… Not Matt, not Chris…” A few beats of silence pass by as the redhead leans closer to his mic. “Nick Stromboli.” 

Chris can be heard faintly giggling as Matt rolls his eyes. “I’m Matt.” The said male adds, holding up a small peace sign as he looks at his camera. 

“I wonder if someone will see that clip of you saying ‘Nick Stromboli’ and actually think that’s your last name,” Chris says as he leans towards his mic, his eyes shifting over at Nick who’s smiling proudly. 

The redhead’s smile falls as a thinking expression plays on his face. “No, because it’s crazy how I will instinctively say ‘Stromboli’ over and over again. Like the number of times I’ve said that instead of Sturniolo is getting a little worrisome.” 

“I’m Chris by the way!” The said male shouts with a large smile. He leans back in his chair and strums an imaginary air guitar for a moment before he returns in front of his mic. Nick adds to the boy's shenanigans by mimicking a few guitar noises before the brunette continues speaking. “Welcome to episode 35 of Cut The Camera Podcast. Today we have a very special episode for you guys  because we have a guest joining us today.” 

“She is sitting right across from me actually. Please, madmazel, introduce yourself to the viewers.” Nick dramatically brings his hand out in front of him and bows his head down. You roll your eyes at the sight and adjust the headphones on your head before looking straight into the camera across from you. 

“Hey guys! I’m y/n, it is very nice to be on here finally.” You greet, your voice soft as you gently speak into the mic. 

“How anticlimactic and boring was that.” You hear Matt mumble. You quickly whip your head around and narrow your eyes at the male who’s resting his head in his hand. 

“Says the one who said ‘I’m Matt’ and called it a day. You can’t be calling me boring when I said more words than you.” You sas, your statement earning a muffled giggle from Chris. Matt sends you a glare, the two of you locking eyes for a moment before he leans in closer to his mic. 

“Womp womp.” 

“Yeah, womp womp to you, kid. Let’s see if I beat you in talking today.” 

“OKAY!” Nick exclaims, a single hand raising as he cuts the bickering between you and Matt. “We’re not even five minutes in and you two are already fighting.” 

“Well, he started it.” You defend as you point an accusing finger towards Matt. Before the male gets the chance to retaliate, Nick cuts him off. 

“Enough! You will have the chance to argue later.” You roll your eyes and send another glare toward Matt as the older sticks his tongue out at you. “Anyways… Guys, this is our younger sister, y/n if you didn’t know.” 

“You guys don’t see her very often since she’s very camera shy and hates being on social media,” Chris adds as he reaches for the red solo cup in front of him. 

“What can I say, social media is a very toxic place.” You say with a shrug. 

“I completely agree.” You nod your head faintly when Nick points his finger at you. “Adding onto what Chris said about y/n being camera shy, we had to beg her to come on here for a week straight.” You send an innocent smile to your camera at the male’s statement and make a small heart with both your hands. 

“They almost gave up until I mentioned that we’d buy her food for a week,” Matt says, both his thumbs pointing toward Chris and Nick. 

“And Matt said he’d buy me a Fortnite skin!” You add. “I’m waiting for the item shop to refresh so I can make him buy the one I want.” 

“Okay, I knew about the food but not the skin,” Nick says, a single eyebrow raising as he looks over at Matt. 

“She made me add it,” Matt replies with a dramatic sigh. “She’s gonna run my pockets dry I kid you not.” 

“Yeah, yeah, you love me anyway.” 

“Do I?” A fake hurtful expression paints your face as you look over at Matt. 

“How rude.” You mumble with a frown. 

“Guys I'm kidding by the way. Don’t wanna stir up unnecessary drama.” Matt quickly blurts out as he points at his camera. 

“Say you love me back then.” You say, your arms crossing over your chest as you stare down at the older male. Matt takes a glance over at you before his gaze shifts over to Chris who gives him a small shrug. 

“I love you too.” Matt mumbles, earning a victorious smile from you. 

“Are you two done? Can we continue?” Nick asks, a heavy sigh escaping his lips as he leans against the booth. 

“We’re done.” You reply with a smile. 

“Okay perfect.” Nick adjusts his posture and reaches for his phone to pull up his notes app. “So, y/n, would you care to tell the viewers a few things about yourself? You know like how old you are, what you like to do, basic stuff.”

“Of course!” You exclaim, you smile not faltering as you look into your camera. “Well for starters, I am 18 years old and my birthday is a week after the triplets’. Hate being the youngest because these fuckers are always teasing me about everything. Especially when it comes to potential love interests.”

“It’s called tough love and being protective.” Chris corrects as he points a single finger at you. 

“Yeah, yeah.” You take a moment to roll your eyes before you continue. “Anyways, there are some things that I enjoy while being the youngest but I don’t think that’s very important right now. As for hobbies, I enjoy art. Especially painting. I have a shit ton of art supplies and enjoy taking time out of my day to take my canvas, paintbrush, and a few paints outside to paint the world around me. I find it very calming and it helps with my anxiety quite a bit.” 

“Sorry for cutting you off. I have to say this real quick.” Nick says as he holds one of his hands out in front of him. You faintly nod your head at the redhead, letting him know he can continue. “y/n is actually really good when it comes to painting. Like especially her landscape works. If she lets me, I’ll post a photo of one of her works on my story after this podcast episode gets uploaded.” 

“Awh, thanks, Nick.” You say, a shy smile overtaking your lips as you begin to fidget with the few rings littering your fingers. 

“I agree with Nick. For my birthday y/n painted me the most beautiful forest landscape with a cabin. I have yet to put it up yet since I’m scared I’ll fuck it up so it’s just sitting on my desk.” Matt adds, the biggest smile creeping onto his lips as he taps back to the day you gave him the said painting. 

“Kid literally cried when she gave it to him. I don’t blame him though, it really is a sick-ass painting.” Chris hops onto the small compliment train as you find yourself sinking into the seat you're in, suddenly feeling a little shy. 

“I’m working on something for  you two by the way.” You speak up, your statement gaining the attention of all the boys as they quickly look over at you. “Nick’s is done, I'm just doing some finishing touches on yours, Chris.” Excited expressions can be seen on the two boy’s faces as they smile widely. 

“Don’t play with me, I’m so fucking excited.” Chris says as he hugs himself. 

“Can you send pics to me? I wanna see.” Matt asks as he sends you a large smile. 

“Yeah, I’ll send you pictures when I get home.” You reply with a small smile of your own. 

“Are you ready to move into the next topic, y/n?” Nick asks as he takes his phone back in his hand and scrolls through his list of questions. 

“Born ready.” You reply, firmly nodding your head as you sit at the edge of your seat and lean in closer to your microphone. 

“Alright…” Silence fills the studio for a moment before Nick asks the next question. “How is it like having triplet older brothers? Like in school or just in general.” 

“Hmm.. Interesting question.” A faint hum emits from your closed lips as you gently tap your pointer finger against your chin. “As for school, being in the same school as you guys was quite the experience. If I got the same teacher as one of you and the teacher recognized my last name, they would go on a small tangent about what it was like having you in the class. When it came to girls, it was pretty freaky considering how most of them tried to befriend me just so they could get closer to the y’all. So making friends that weren’t interested in using me to know my brother was a little tough. I did find a few friends though so I promise I'm not a lonely little fuck.” 

All three boys laugh in unison the moment the last sentence escapes your mouth. You simply shrug your shoulders and send your camera a tight-lipped smile before one of your brothers speaks up. 

“She’s lying, she has like two close friends right now.” Matt says, earning a loud, dramatic gasp from you. 

“Matt, what the fuck!” You exclaim, a hurtful expression playing on your face as you look over at the older male. “In my defense, I think that it’s better to have two close friends than 10 friends who are fake.” 

“She has a point.” Chris says as he gently nods his head. 

“y/n, continue.” Nick urges as he waves his hand out in front of him. 

“As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted.” You start, your eyes narrowing as you glare at Matt. “I also found it quite weird how girls would openly confess their feelings for one of you guys to my face. Like… Why are y'all telling me this, I'm not them. I also didn’t understand what they saw in you guys.” 

“Okay, rude.” Nick mumbles as he focuses his gaze on his phone. 

“Yall are my brothers so I could never see them how I saw you.” You defend with a shrug. “Anyways, outside of school was a whole different story. People didn’t know I was y’all’s sister unless they knew of my last name or if I was hanging out with you guys. Speaking of hangouts, I found it quite endearing how people would come up to us because they recognized you guys. Like you guys always talked out how being recognized in public was a dream of y'alls and seeing it happen was very heartwarming. Apart from being recognized, it was funny to see people’s reactions to seeing triplets just walking around minding their own business. It was like I was in a fucking zoo when I was with these three. I always had to tell people to mind their business because they just stand there and fucking stare. Like God, some people just have no manners sometimes.” 

“Yeah, some people act like we’re literal aliens. It’s fucking weird. Like hello, we’re regular human beings that just so happen to be triplets.” Chris chimes in as he rolls his eyes. 

“Yeah, it’s fucking insane.” You agree as you nod your head faintly, your gaze shifting to Nick whose eyes are glued to his phone. 

“You texting your boyfriend over there?” You call. Your statement quickly catches the redhead’s attention as he quickly lifts his head, his face flushing as he locks eyes with you. “Did I miss something?” 

“No,” Nick replies flatly. 

“Why are you blushing then?” 

“I’m not?”

You send the older male a look as he avoids your intense gaze by looking back down at his phone. 

You were definitely gonna pry about this later. 

“Anyways, next topic,” Nick says after he clears his throat. “What are some of your favorite childhood memories that we were a part of?” 

“God there’s so many.” You start as you begin to gaze off into the distance, your mind running with countless old memories. “I’ll start with Chris and work my way up.” All three boys nod their heads and wait for you to continue to be lost in your thoughts for a moment longer before you finally continue. “I remember when dad took Chris out to play mini golf one day and I begged Jimmy to take me with him because I wanted to hang out with Chris. I vividly remember placing bets with Chris on who would make the most holes and the loser would have to jump in a bush and give up 20 bucks to the winner. Seeing Chris jump in a bush and humiliate himself in front of a group of girls was the highlight of my week.” 

“How old were you when this happened?” Matt asks with a laugh. 

“About nine.” You reply, faintly nodding as you look over at Chris who has his head buried in his hands. 

“So you’re telling me a nine-year-old beat you in a game of mini golf,” Nick states as he turns in his seat to also look over at Chris. 

“I let her win!”  The brunette defends as he points his pointer finger at you. 

“Did you really?” You ask, your jaw-dropping. 

“Yeah.” 

“We’re going out for another game of mini golf then because that’s fucked up.”

“Fine, we’re going this weekend.” 

“Same rules?”

“Same rules but we’re tripling the prize money.”

“Alright, word. You’re going down, Owen.” 

“Ooohh she said your middle name.” Nick coos as he bites back a laugh. 

Chris rolls his eyes, a smile creeping up onto his lips. “Yeah, yeah. We’ll see this weekend.” 

“Guys, I'm gonna record our game and send it to Nick so you guys can see how badly I’ll destroy him.” You say as you stare into your camera. Chris shakes his head and makes a talking gesture with his hand before you continue. “Anyways, I remember when I was like 7 that for Halloween, Matt and I both wanted to be Spider-Man but we were arguing about it for like two hours because we both couldn’t be Spider-Man. And before you all say anything, I don’t think Spider-Gwen existed back then so I didn’t even think of being the female version of Spider-Man. Anyways, mom ended up painting my suit a different color so me and Matt could both wear our suits and go trick or treating.” 

“Oh my God, I remember that. We were both being annoying little pricks with our web shooters.” Matt says with a smile as he does a web-shooting gesture with his hand. 

“I also remember Dad having to confiscate the said web shooters because you and y/n kept abusing us with them,” Nick adds as he rolls his eyes and leans back against the booth with his arms crossed. 

“Those fuckers hurt like hell. I think I had a bruise for like a week.” Chris says as he rubs the side of his thigh. 

“Yeah, yeah. What matters most is that Matt and I had the night of our fucking lives.” You say as you look over at the said male. You go to send him a smile but the moment you see the older get up from his seat and lean towards you with his hand held out in front of him, you quickly lean in and share a quick high five. 

“Anyways... I didn’t forget about you, Nick.” You start as you send a wide smile to the said male. “When I turned eleven, Mom and Dad took us to go to the arcade for my birthday because I wanted to get all the plushies. Me being fucking dog shit at crane games ended up spending all my game currency in like 10 minutes and didn’t win anything. When Nick found out, he used the remainder of his credits to get me like five Hello Kitty plushies. I still have them to this day and they’re all sitting on my bed. Not to mention how like two of them are fucking massive and so soft.” 

“Wait, you still have them?” Nick asks, his eyes slightly wide as he looks at you. 

“Of course I do! They’re tied to memories, Nick.” You reply as you twirl your finger inside one of the holes at the corner of the desk. 

“How much stuff do you have from your childhood? Like did you keep most stuff in your old bedroom or did you get rid of everything?” Chris asks as he shifts his focus over to you, his left hand reaching to bring the microphone closer to him. 

“It depends on the emotional connection I have with that item. If it was just in my room just to be in my room, it means nothing. If it was something from you guys or Mom and Dad, I most definitely still have it in my room. I will not allow myself to throw something away that holds memories or if I have deep attachments to it.” 

“So if I gave you a rock, you’d keep it?” Matt asks with a small smile. 

You narrow your eyes at the male. “Well, it’s a rock so no. Maybe if I was like five, maybe I’d keep it.”

“Wait, now I wanna see what all you kept,” Nick says as he sits upright.

“You would be very surprised about how much shit I have in my room.” You say as you lean back in your seat, your arms crossing over your chest. 

“Next vlog is gonna be a house raid slash y/n house tour video guys! Look out for it.” Chris states as he points at his camera. 

“I think I'm good actually, thanks.” You mumble, your statement earning soft laughs from the three in front of you. 

“So I'm guessing that's a no to the house raid?” Nick asks, a single eyebrow raising as he slightly tilts his head to the side. 

“Well I'm not saying no to raiding my house or the house tour, I'm saying no to the video. I don’t want people to see my living conditions. Knowing how well your fans find where you guys are at, I wouldn’t doubt that they’d find where I live.” You defend, your voice soft as you point down at the desk in hopes of getting your point across. 

“Okay, that’s very reasonable.” Matt agrees as he leans back against the booth, a single arm coming up to rest at the top of it. 

“So we can raid your house,” Chris says as the smile on his lips grows. 

You let out a soft sigh as you pinch the bridge of your nose. “Yes, you guys can raid my house.” You give in. All the boys cheer loudly at your statement, causing a soft laugh to emit from you. “BUT you need to text me before y'all come over.” 

“Deal!” Nick exclaims, his hands clasping together a few times as he claps excitedly. 

“Gonna start the prank wars back up the second I step foot inside your house by the way,” Matt says, his statement barely being picked up by the microphone as he leans back a little. 

“WHAT?” You ask, your voice coming out louder than intended as you stare wide-eyed at the brunette to your right. 

“What’s the next topic, Nick?” Matt asks, trying to switch the topic as he sends the redhead a small smile. 

“Matt, repeat what you said right now.” You demand as you reach over to grab the flamingo plush in front of you. “Or the flamingo gets it.” 

“Hey!” Nick exclaims, his loud and sudden voice startling you. “Do not touch Fred. Put him down.” 

You raise both your hands up in surrender and slowly put the flamingo back down. As you do so, you can hear Matt giggling softly in your headset and you quickly send a glare to the male as you return to your seat. 

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@freshloveforthefit @nickuniversity @patscorner @frankdelreyy @sturnssan @kileybankzz @robins-scoop

[musicforastylesrestaurant]

His Forever Valentine.

masterlist || ask me anything <3

authors note - happy valentines day you sexy people, mwah !!

word count - 4.3k

in which, you and harry have been each others valentines for what seems like forever, it all started back in 2014, and now, in 2024, your love story is still going strong, so when you look back on memories from over the years, the two of you realise just how far you’ve really come.

February 14th, 2024.

You let out a soft huff.

Last night, you and your husband had taken part in some secret little rendezvous and that had meant that clothes were discarded all over the floor, which you had left until this morning to be cleaned up.

So now, here you were.

As you tidy up the bedroom, picking up clothes strewn across the floor, your foot suddenly collides with something solid.

You glance down and notice a shoebox with "Valentine's Day" scrawled across the lid. Curiosity piqued, you bend down to pick it up, recognizing it as the container for your cherished Polaroid camera and the collection of snapshots you and your husband have taken on Valentine's Days past.

With a gentle tug, you open the lid, revealing a treasure trove of memories captured in instant film. Each photograph tells a story of love, laughter, and shared moments over the years.

You smile as you sift through the images, remembering the joy of each Valentine's Day celebration spent together.

The camera nestled among the Polaroids brings back memories of spontaneous snapshots, impromptu poses, and candid shots captured in the heat of the moment. It's a tangible reminder of the love that has grown and deepened between you and your husband since you first embarked on this journey together.

As you hold the camera in your hands, you're transported back to those special moments frozen in time. From romantic dinners to adventurous outings, each Polaroid is a testament to the bond you share and the memories you've created together.

You can't help but laugh softly as you descend the stairs, the shoebox cradled carefully in your arms. Entering the living room, you find your husband seated, still clad in his workout attire from his early morning gym session.

As you approach him, you place the box gently on his lap, causing him to look up at you with a puzzled expression, a crease forming in his eyebrows as he registers the unexpected gift.

"It was tucked away in the bedroom," you explain, intertwining your fingers with his. "I thought it would be nice to take a trip down memory lane together."

Feeling his warm lips pressing against the top of your head, you lean into his affectionate gesture, savoring the moment of closeness. As he opens up the box and pulls out the first Polaroid, a wave of nostalgia washes over you.

The image captures him back in 2013, a mischievous grin playing on his lips as he holds a rose between his teeth.

You remember that day vividly, as if it were yesterday. It was your first Valentine's Day together, and he had surprised you with a romantic gesture that had left you speechless.

Seeing the Polaroid now, you can't help but smile at the memory of his playful antics and the joy it had brought you.

As he gazes at the photograph, a fond smile tugs at his lips.

"M’remember this," he murmurs, his voice laced with affection. "That was such a fun day."

The memory floods back, enveloping you in a cascade of emotions as you revisit that magical Valentine's Day four months into your relationship with Harry. You can still feel the nervous excitement fluttering in your chest as you try to persuade him to play along with your whimsical idea.

"Come on, H," you urge, your eyes sparkling with mischief as you hold out the single red rose. "It'll be hilarious! You'll look so macho with the rose between your teeth."

Harry's expression is a mixture of amusement and reluctance as he eyes the flower skeptically.

"I don't know, babe," he says, a hint of uncertainty in his voice. "It feels a bit silly."

But you're determined to coax him into indulging your playful whim. Fluttering your eyelashes at him, you pout exaggeratedly, knowing full well the effect it has on him.

"Please, H," you plead, giving him your best puppy-dog eyes. "It'll be our little Valentine's Day joke."

Unable to resist your charms, Harry finally relents with a chuckle, a reluctant smile playing on his lips.

"Alright, fine," he concedes, taking the rose from your hand and tentatively placing it between his teeth. "But if anyone sees us, I'm blaming you."

You can't help but giggle at his mock seriousness, feeling a rush of affection for the man who's willing to go along with your whimsical antics just to see you smile.

/ /

Back in the present moment, Harry reaches for another Polaroid from the box, his fingers delicately tracing the edges of the photograph. As he pulls it out, you feel a surge of anticipation, eager to revisit another cherished memory captured on Valentine's Day.

This time, the image transports you back to 2015, seated in a cozy restaurant with Harry across the table, his hand clasping yours tenderly.

You remember that evening vividly, the soft glow of candlelight casting a warm ambiance as you savored each other's company over a romantic dinner. Harry's gaze, filled with love and adoration, never wavered from yours as you shared laughter, conversation, and stolen glances throughout the night.

As you study the Polaroid, the memory comes flooding back, enveloping you in a cocoon of warmth and affection. It's moments like these, captured in snapshots of time, that remind you of the depth of your connection and the beauty of your love story.

With a soft smile, Harry leans over and presses a gentle kiss to your cheek, his touch a silent affirmation of the love that continues to blossom between you.

As you sit across from Harry in the cozy restaurant, the air thick with anticipation and love, you notice a hint of nervousness flickering in his eyes.

Suddenly, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small box, causing your heart to skip a beat.

Your eyes widen in surprise as Harry's words hang in the air, his hesitant demeanor only adding to the gravity of the moment.

"I have something for you," he says softly, his voice tinged with a mixture of apprehension and excitement.

With trembling hands, he opens the box, revealing a delicate piece of jewelry with what appears to have a key nestled within. Your breath catches in your throat as you realize the significance of his gesture, your heart pounding with anticipation.

But before you can fully process the contents of the box, Harry clears his throat nervously, his gaze locking with yours.

"I... I have something else to ask you," he begins, his voice slightly shaky. "Would you... would you like to move in with me?"

Tears shimmer in your eyes as you reach for Harry's hand across the table, squeezing it tightly in a silent affirmation of your love and devotion.

"Yes," you whisper, your voice barely above a breath. "Yes, Harry, I would love to move in with you."

/ /

Harry's laughter fills the room once more as he reminisces about that special evening. With a fond smile, he looks up at you, his eyes sparkling with affection.

"That was one of the nicest evenings we've shared together," he muses, his voice tinged with nostalgia.

You nod in agreement, feeling a rush of warmth flood your heart as you recall the joy and love that had enveloped you both on that unforgettable Valentine's Day.

It was a moment of pure bliss, a testament to the strength of your bond and the depth of your connection.

As you gaze at Harry, his laughter echoing in the room, you can't help but marvel at the journey you've embarked on together. Through the ups and downs, the laughter and tears, you've remained by each other's side, growing stronger with each passing day.

Harry reaches for another Polaroid from the box, his fingers brushing against the edges of the photograph with a tender reverence. As he pulls it out, you feel a rush of excitement, knowing that this snapshot holds yet another cherished memory from your shared Valentine's Day celebrations.

This time, the image transports you back to 2017, a year filled with love, laughter, and a furry addition to your family.

You remember the joyous moment vividly, the surprise etched on Harry's face as he laid eyes on the adorable puppy you had carefully chosen for him. It was a breed he had always admired, and seeing his eyes light up with delight was a gift in itself.

In the Polaroid, Harry's face is aglow with happiness as he lets the puppy kiss his cheek, his smile radiant and infectious. The bond between them is palpable, a testament to the love and companionship that would come to define their relationship over the years.

As Harry sat on the couch, oblivious to the surprise in store, you couldn't help but feel a flutter of nerves in your stomach. Taking a deep breath to steady your nerves, you walked into the room, a mischievous grin playing on your lips as you held the squirming puppy in your arms.

"Hey, babe," you greeted Harry with a smile, trying to mask your excitement. "I have something for you."

Harry looked up from his book, curiosity flickering in his eyes as he watched you approach.

"What's that?" he asked, his brow furrowing slightly in confusion.

With a dramatic flourish, you revealed the wriggling bundle of fur in your arms, watching as Harry's eyes widened in surprise.

"Happy Valentine's Day!" you exclaimed, unable to contain your excitement any longer.

Harry's expression shifted from confusion to sheer delight as he took in the sight of the puppy, its tail wagging furiously as it sniffed the air in excitement.

"No way!" he exclaimed, his face breaking into a wide grin. "S’this for me?"

You nodded eagerly, your heart swelling with happiness at his reaction.

"Yes, it's for you," you confirmed, gently placing the puppy in his arms. "I know how much you've always wanted a dog, so I thought it was time we added a furry friend to our family."

Tears welled up in Harry's eyes as he held the puppy close, his heart overflowing with gratitude and love.

"I can't believe you did this," he whispered, his voice choked with emotion. "This is the best Valentine's Day gift ever."

As you watched the scene unfold before you, the room filled with laughter and the sound of happy barks, you knew that this moment would be etched in your memory forever. It was a testament to the power of love and the joy of sharing life's precious moments with the ones you hold dear.

/ /

Harry's fingers gently stroke the fur of the large, but still beloved, dog nestled next to him. Pancake, now fully grown but forever a puppy at heart, looks up at Harry with adoring eyes, a silent reminder of the bond they share.

With a nostalgic smile, Harry recalls the early days when Pancake was just a tiny ball of fur, bounding around the house with endless energy and mischief.

"Remember when he was small enough to fit in the palm of my hand?" Harry muses, his voice tinged with fondness.

You nod, your own heart swelling with affection as you watch the pair interact.

"Those were some unforgettable times," you agree, your voice soft with reminiscence. "He's grown so much since then, but he'll always be our little Pancake."

With a sense of anticipation, Harry reaches for another Polaroid from the box, his movements deliberate as he carefully selects the next snapshot to relive. As he pulls it out, your breath catches in your throat, anticipation building as you recognize the significance of the photograph.

This time, the image transports you back to a breathtaking sunset in Italy, a moment forever etched in your memory as the day Harry asked you to be his forever.

In the Polaroid, the radiant glow of the Italian sunset provides the perfect backdrop to the centerpiece of the image: your sparkling engagement ring, glimmering in the fading light. Memories flood back as you recall the magic of that evening, the air thick with anticipation as Harry led you to the terrace of your shared villa.

The setting sun cast a golden hue over the landscape, painting the sky in shades of orange and pink as you stood hand in hand with Harry, the world seemingly frozen in time. With trembling hands and a heart full of love, Harry dropped to one knee, his eyes shining with emotion as he poured his heart out to you in a heartfelt proposal.

The air is alive with the scent of Mediterranean flowers and the soft murmur of the evening breeze. Harry's hand clasps yours tightly, his gaze fixed on yours with unwavering intensity as he leads you to the edge of the terrace, where the sun dips below the horizon in a fiery display of color.

"Close your eyes," Harry whispers, his voice tinged with excitement as he guides you to a spot overlooking the rolling hills and the sparkling sea below. You comply, a smile playing on your lips as you anticipate the surprise Harry has in store.

A moment later, you feel his warm breath against your ear as he murmurs softly, "Okay, now open them."

As you open your eyes, the breathtaking sight before you takes your breath away. The sky is ablaze with hues of orange and pink, casting a warm glow over the landscape as the sun sets in a magnificent display of natural beauty. Candlelit lanterns twinkle along the terrace, creating a romantic ambiance that sets your heart aflutter.

"It's beautiful," you breathe, turning to Harry with a look of wonder on your face.

Harry smiles, his eyes twinkling with mischief as he takes your hand in his leading you further onto the terrace until you're bathed in the soft, golden light of the setting sun.

And then, with a suddenness that catches you off guard, Harry drops to one knee, his hand reaching into his pocket as he pulls out a small velvet box. Your heart leaps into your throat as you realize what's happening, your breath catching as Harry's eyes meet yours, filled with love and determination.

"From the moment I met you, I knew you were the one," Harry begins, his voice steady but filled with emotion. "You've brought so much joy and love into my life, and I can't imagine spending another day without you by my side."

As he speaks, Harry opens the box to reveal the dazzling engagement ring nestled within, its sparkle reflecting the light of the setting sun.

"Will you marry me?" he asks, his voice soft but resolute, his eyes never leaving yours as he waits for your answer.

/ /

Harry's voice breaks through your reverie, his words a tender reminder of the significance of that day.

"I still can't believe you said yes," he murmurs, his eyes reflecting the love and wonder he felt in that moment.

You reach for Harry's hand, squeezing it gently as you relive the joy and excitement of your engagement.

"It was the easiest 'yes' I've ever said," you reply, your voice filled with warmth and affection.

Harry reaches for another Polaroid from the box, his fingers tracing the edges of the photograph with a gentle reverence. As he pulls it out, his breath catches in his throat, a small gasp escaping his lips as he realizes the significance of the snapshot.

In the Polaroid, you and Harry stand side by side, radiant in your wedding attire, surrounded by the lush greenery of the church garden. The joy and love that radiate from the photograph are palpable, a testament to the happiness you both felt in that momentous occasion.

Harry's eyes linger on the image, a soft smile playing on his lips as he recalls the whirlwind of emotions that swept over him on your wedding day. It was a day filled with love, laughter, and promises of forever, a day you had both chosen to celebrate your love on Valentine's Day, the most romantic day of the year.

Little did you know at the time that Harry's best friend, Niall, had snapped the photograph, capturing the tender moment without either of you realizing it.

"M’can't believe it," Harry murmured, his voice filled with wonder as he gazed into your eyes, his own sparkling with love and adoration. "We're finally husband and wife."

You couldn't help but smile, feeling a rush of happiness wash over you as you took in the sight of your new husband, his face illuminated by the soft glow of the setting sun.

"I know," you replied, your voice tinged with excitement. "It still feels like a dream."

As you walked hand in hand through the garden, the world seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of you in a cocoon of love and happiness. Each step felt like a dance, a celebration of your newfound union and the beginning of your shared journey as husband and wife.

"I love you," Harry whispered, his words a tender declaration of his devotion as he pulled you closer into his embrace. "I've never been happier than I am in this moment, with you by my side."

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes as you leaned into Harry's chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart against yours.

"I love you too," you whispered back, your voice filled with emotion. "More than words can say."

/ /

With a tender smile, Harry reaches for another Polaroid from the box, his fingers tracing the edges of the photograph with a sense of reverence. As he pulls it out, he holds it close to his chest, his eyes shining with emotion as he gazes at the image. This, he declares, is one of his favorites so far.

In the Polaroid, Harry is fast asleep, his features softened in slumber as he lies peacefully in bed, unaware of the momentous news about to unfold. In the foreground, a pregnancy test rests on the bedside table, its result displayed prominently for the camera to capture.

You remember the moment vividly, the mix of nerves and excitement coursing through your veins as you prepared to share the life-changing news with Harry. With a trembling hand, you had set up the camera, carefully framing the shot to include both Harry and the pregnancy test, capturing the raw emotion of the moment for posterity.

You and Harry sat side by side under a blanket of stars, the soft glow of moonlight casting a romantic ambiance over the scene. With the night sky twinkling above you, you knew it was the perfect moment to share the life-changing news you had been keeping a secret.

Taking a deep breath to steady your nerves, you turned to Harry, your heart pounding in your chest as you mustered the courage to speak.

"Harry, there's something I need to tell you," you began, your voice barely above a whisper.

Harry turned to you, his eyes shining with curiosity and affection.

"What is it, love?" he asked, his hand reaching out to gently caress yours.

With a nervous flutter in your stomach, you took a deep breath before blurting out the words you had been rehearsing in your mind.

"I'm pregnant," you confessed, your voice trembling with emotion.

At first, Harry's expression registered disbelief, his eyes widening in shock as he processed your words.

"Really?" he exclaimed, his voice filled with a mixture of surprise and disbelief.

You nodded, a small smile playing on your lips as you reached into your pocket to retrieve the pregnancy test. Holding it out to Harry, you watched as his eyes flickered from the test to your face and back again, the realization slowly sinking in.

Tears welled up in Harry's eyes as he took the test from you, his hands trembling slightly as he examined the result. And then, as the truth of the moment washed over him, he broke into tears, his emotions overflowing as he pulled you into a tight embrace.

"M’going to be a daddy," he whispered, his voice choked with emotion as he pressed a kiss to your forehead. "I can't believe it."

/ /

As Harry studies the photograph, a myriad of emotions flicker across his face, from surprise to joy to overwhelming love.

"I remember this," he murmurs, his voice soft with emotion. "I had no idea what was coming."

You reach out to grasp his hand, squeezing it gently as you relive the anticipation and excitement of that unforgettable moment.

"It was one of the happiest moments of my life," you confess, your heart swelling with love for the man beside you.

With a tender smile, Harry leans in to press a kiss to your forehead, his arms wrapping around you in a comforting embrace.

"And it was the beginning of the greatest adventure of our lives," he whispers, his voice filled with love and gratitude.

And just like that your almost two year old made his presence known.

As Sebastian toddles into the room, his chubby cheeks flushed with excitement from his playtime adventures in the toy room, a delighted squeal escapes his lips at the sight of his father. With a burst of energy, he throws himself onto Harry's lap, his tiny arms wrapping around his father's neck as he snuggles in close.

Harry chuckles warmly at Sebastian's exuberance, his heart swelling with love as he wraps his arms around his son in a tight embrace.

"Hey there, little buddy," he greets, his voice filled with affection as he ruffles Sebastian's curly hair, the same curls that match his own.

Sebastian giggles gleefully, his eyes sparkling with joy as he gazes up at his father. His attention is quickly drawn to the cross necklace dangling around Harry's neck, the delicate chain catching the light as it sways gently with his movements.

"Dada," Sebastian babbles, reaching out to touch the necklace with chubby fingers, his curiosity piqued by the shiny object.

Harry smiles down at his son, his heart swelling with pride at the sight of Sebastian's innocent fascination.

Sebastian's eyes widen with wonder as he continues to examine the necklace, his tiny fingers tracing the outline of the cross with gentle fascination.

"Pretty," he murmurs, his voice filled with awe.

Harry nods, a fond smile playing on his lips as he gazes down at his son.

"Yes, it is," he agrees, his heart overflowing with love for the precious little boy nestled in his arms.

As Sebastian sits in Harry's lap, giggling and playing with his father's necklace, you feel a pang of bittersweet nostalgia wash over you. Your little boy is growing up before your eyes, each day bringing new discoveries and adventures. You can't help but marvel at how quickly time seems to be slipping through your fingers.

Determined to capture this precious moment, you reach for the Polaroid camera resting on the nearby table. With a sense of urgency, you snap a photo of Harry and Sebastian, their smiles bright and their bond palpable. The sound of the camera's shutter clicking fills the room, freezing the moment in time for eternity.

As the photo develops before your eyes, you can't help but feel a swell of gratitude wash over you. This, you realize, is what life is all about—cherishing the fleeting moments of joy and love that make it all worthwhile.

With a gentle smile playing on your lips, you reach for the pen that lays on the coffee table, its sleek design catching the light as you pick it up. Gripping it firmly in your hand, you carefully write a special little message on the underneath of the Polaroid, a message of love and gratitude that you know will warm Harry's heart when he discovers it.

Once the message is complete, you place the Polaroid neatly back in the box, its presence a tangible reminder of the love and memories you've shared together on Valentine's Day. With a sense of satisfaction, you close the lid, knowing that this small gesture will hold a special place in Harry's heart for years to come.

Turning to Harry, who sits beside you with Sebastian in his lap, you snuggle into his warm embrace, reveling in the comfort and love that surrounds you.

"I love you," you whisper, your voice filled with emotion as you press a kiss to his cheek.

Harry's arms tighten around you, pulling you close as he murmurs softly,

"I love you both so much." His words are a tender declaration of his love, a reminder of the bond that binds you together as a family.

With another Polaroid security added to the box, your reloaded just how much you can’t wait to add even more photos as the years progress.

[dropthedemiurge]

Love for Love's Sake: Bоnus Stаge (spoilers!!)

Love For Love's Sake (Love Supremacy Zone): bonus stagе is a short spin-off story from the author of the original novel, released in June 2024 (after the drama series). It's about 19yo Tae Myungha (from Game World) being transferred into the future and him slowly realizing how 29yo Myungha has been living happy 10 years with Cha Yeowoon and friends.

I promised to keep talking about it and thank you, guys, for enabling me xD Before translating bits from chapters, here's the full summary of everything that happened in this story – for those of you who are not that patient and don't fear spoilers :] I'll put them under more anyway so those who don't want to read the summary won't read them accidentally!

Warnings: suicidal intentions

Let me know your thoughts about this spinoff *д*

Love for Love's Sake: Bonus Stage (summary)

"If your life was a book, what would you want it be about?" "How would the first chapter begin and what sentence would be the last one?" "I wish it was about love."

19yo Myungha (so before canon timeline) is playing games in PC cafe. He doesn't really have money but wants to spend time so he wouldn't have to live it

On the crossroad, he sees a child running before the signal changes, and he jumps to save them but instead of getting hit, he feels like falling. He sees sunbae who pushes him. Message [World has been changed] appears.

Myungha finds himself in the arms of a handsome man who knows him - but he doesn't know this man. Myungha runs away but the man is faster.

[Mission: Make Tae Myungha happy.] [Reward: Memory] [Clear until (0%) ♥♥♥♥♥] [Penalty: Can't return to the original timeline]

Myungha is diagnosed with amnesia. He should be 29yo now, so he just goes along. Yeowoon decides to start over again and introduces himself.

Yeowoon and Myungha have been living together for 6 years and dating for 10 years. 19-Myungha is shocked to know this.

Ahn Sia, Kyunghoon and Sangwon immediately run to check whether Myungha is okay, 19-Myungha is shocked that people worry about him and they've been friends for 10 years.

Yeowoon asked if Myungha would hypothetically date him - just to make sure - but he still wouldn't let Sangwon in before others come (he's sooo jealous)

Sangwon finds younger Myungha a lot of fun, Yeowoon wants to fight with him. Others come, so they try to figure out what's happening.

29yo Myungha is a teacher respected by kids. The girl in his class wanted to kill herself so she went to the rooftop, Myungha ran after her but ended up falling down, and Yeowoon caught him (19-Myungha)

Sia is a shopping mall CEO and a popular influencer now, Kyunghoon does photography/filming professionally, Sangwon introduces himself as 'the one who Myungha rejected when he was 18yo'.

Everyone wants to have chicken and beer but 19-Myungha is a minor so they have chicken and cola and a group sleepover at Myungha/Yeowoon's house :]

Yeowoon tried to sleep with Myungha in one bed but eventually ran away to the living room, flustered.

They all decide to do a trip down the memory lane, since Myungha is "having amnesia".

Yeowoon is a gold medalist now, and many kids go to Shinyeop school now because he made it prestigious.

They visit old Yeowoon's house, and Yeowoon quietly tells him they had kissed here for the first time (on the stairs) 19-Myungha is flustered because he feels feelings that he doesn't know the source of. But he never had his first kiss, never thought about ideal type or love so he's can't stop thinking about it. He tried to take Yeowoon's hand but ran out of time.

After this trip, in the car Myungha clears 20% of his mission and sees flashbacks from the 10 passed years: how they were grilling meat at the rooftop, how they played at the sea.

Yeowoon went to the store to get ice cream, while Myungha and Sangwon were left alone waiting. Sangwon told 19-Myungha about precious memories with him (dogs!), how he was his first love and he kept regretting what if he made a different first impression on Myungha – and now he can.

So he asks for one more chance to start over but gets rejected because Yeowoon was faster once again. Sangwon accepts that his first love is finally over and walks away.

Yeowoon says he likes Myungha more anyway, but 19-Myungha doesn't know it so Yeowoon says he'll teach him. They go to amusement park (closed again) by the sea.

Myungha insists on going to the popular cafe, Yeowoon is hesitant but doesn't reveal the truth until Myungha meets his mom there. Yeowoon takes him away in a hurry as 19-Myungha wants to talk to her in anger. Myungha cries. He thinks if he didn't have Yeowoon next to him now, his mom's reaction would be his last straw.

Mission is cleared to 40%. 19-Myungha sees 18yo Yeowoon crying and being comforted by "him".

19-Myungha thinks the person Yeowoon fell in love with is nothing like him, so he runs away. Yeowoon catches up with him.

Suddenly, they meet his fans. 19-Myungha is confused to learn he's quite popular and has 100k followers on his YT channel where he's been posting vlogs for 10 years (Yeowoon made him do it). He's used to being widely hated as a Crazy Dog, and not widely loved.

19-Myungha doesn't want to restore memories because he doesn't want to return to his original timeline. But he also feels acutely that 29-Myungha is a very different person from him. So he openly tells Yeowoon about the game mission, and Yeowoon believes him.

They return home, and 19-Myungha notices that Yeowoon still cherishes him like they were new lovers and not 10yo couple that usually feels like a family. Yeowoon was testing his reaction to skinship. Myungha calls him to sleep and teases him for having dirty thoughts.

19-Myungha is scared to sleep because he fears to wake up from a good dream. Yeowoon comforts him, while Myungha teases again and asks whether he's going to kiss. Yeowoon responds he'll wait until Myungha does it himself, like the first time (I guess, it's a bit different from drama?)

In the morning, Myungha learns that his grandma is still alive in this timeline and is in the hospital with injured leg. He rushes there and cries a little seeing her alive. He pleads her to come live with them but the grandma is like 'wtf this kid gone insane'.

His memories are cleared until 60% and he remembers time spent with his grandma.

19-Myungha watches videos on "his" Youtube channel and he sees what kind of life 29-Myungha lived and what kind of person he was. He finds they weren't actually that different and he could become him. He sees how liked he was and what kind of person younger Yeowoon was too.

They go to get groceries, and suddenly 19-Myungha is surrounded by kids that claim he's their homeroom teacher. Yeowoon saves him from awkwardness, it seems like they don't know Yeowoon and Myungha are dating. The kids say that their entire class will always love their teacher Myungha, and 19-Myungha understands why he chose this job.

Mission is cleared until 80%. He sees flashbacks from teaching kids, he still keeps in touch with the ones that left. 19-Myungha starts to smile.

But he still doesn't want to go home, he's also scared that original Myungha comes back and he will disappear. He doesn't want to leave.

Yeowoon tells him he'll be waiting for him even if he goes back to his time. He tells him to return and find 18yo Yeowoon, because he exists there and he will definitely like and choose Myungha.

Myungha is overwhelmed with feelings and goes to kiss Yeowoon. This time he's the inexperienced one.

The timeline written down by Myungha: "First meeting at 19, first fight at 20, living together at 23, passing teacher's exam, Yeowoon breaking the world record, Myungha becoming homeroom teacher, having 5 anniversary trip".

Last 20% are still missing. He's waiting for Yeowoon to come home, he returns with the cake and flowers. It's their 10th anniversary today, so Yeowoon insists he still has to celebrate, despite the situation. Myungha feels bad that he always forgets about anniversaries.

Yeowoon proposes to Myungha. He gives him his wedding plan and prepared funds.

Myungha laughs (while Yeowoon is annoyed :D) and gets positive buff, as he falls in love. [Mission is cleared until 99.9%]. He witnesses more happy flashbacks.

Because it's legally difficult, Yeowoon still wants to get married. Myungha tells him if he proposes again in 10 years, he'll accept. And teases him for being in such a rush to speedrun the relationship.

He remembers all memories from 10 years of their life and love together, he tells Yeowoon 'of course' and finally decides to return home and meet Yeowoon in his own timeline.

But Myungha is scared because there's still 0.1% to fail. He remembers the sunbae who pushed him before the world has changed. He wonders who that was.

He sees himself talking with sunbae, who asks him what is happy life to Myungha and if his life was a book, what would it be about.

"If your life was a book, what would you want it be about?" Someone is asking next to me. "...love. I wish it was about love." I wished that this thing, which was so common that I could hear about it everywhere but have never really felt it, could exist in my life too. The sunbae smiled quietly. "I just decided on a title".

Sunbae tells Myungha that humans are made of stars and apologizes that he was so late. He asks him to live the way he wants to.

He pushes him again. Message [The world has been changed] appears.

29yo Myungha wakes up next to Yeowoon and immediately goes to hug him. He finally feels like his soul and body are perfectly aligned, and he remembers how lonely he was when he was 19.

He tells Yeowoon they'll go see stars on their honeymoon trip. But first, they want to take a trip to Taiwan and the grandma is bitter they're not taking her with them because she's convinced they're gonna secretly get married there. But Myungha and Yeowoon want to get married in Korea.

[Mission: Make Tae Myungha happy is completed with 100%]

29-Myungha goes to meet the girl in his class who he saved on the rooftop. They both talk about how they don't want to die anymore and they should never give up. The girl also says Yeowoon suits him well, and Myungha promises to invite her to their wedding.

[END OF THE GAME.]

[LOADING]

19yo Myungha gets back to his conscience on the street, as someone asks him if he's okay. He is surprised to see Yeowoon, while Yeowoon is displeased that Myungha knows his name since they never met before.

Yeowoon walks away, but Myungha starts running after him.

[ENTERING THE LOVE SUPREMACY ZONE]

That's it 🥺 Of course, there are many amazing and touching moments in the story itself but I wrote down the main points. Aren't they precious?!

Tag list: @pickletrip @bunni-bun @illuminutiae @kaleidoskuls @delesaria-blog @maybe-boys-do-love

[fortheloveofwonderland]

In This Diary | S.R

Summary - The summer of ‘02 was supposed to be just like any summer that had come before. Spencer Reid was mostly hoping to relax before his started his new job at the Behavioural Analysis Unit in the fall. But best laid plans often go awry.

Now all these years later he’s come into possession of the diary he kept during that time and he’s forced on a trip down memory lane to a perfect Las Vegas summer in which he fell in love for the very first time. But if he’s not careful, he might allow himself to get so lost in his nostalgia he may not be able to drag himself back to the present.

A/N - this goes back and forth a lot in time, I hope it makes sense. Where there’s a page break it goes back to the present day. Based on the song In This Diary by The Ataris. Written for @imagining-in-the-margins Summer Sunshine Challenge. Thank you again @pinkiceee-prose and @andiebeaword for reading over this 🖤

Pairing - Spencer Reid / Fem! Reader

Category - angst with happy ending | strangers to friends to lovers | smut minors DNI

Warnings - post prison, pot smoking, virgin Spencer, slight sub! Spencer, use of “good boy”, mild praise kink (Spencer), handjob, swearing, fingering, masturbation (m), brief mention of medication but no specifics, talk of PTSS, angst, allusions to sex, brief mention of protected sex, oral (m receiving), brief mention of past addiction and Emily’s “death”.

WC - 10.3k honestly I can’t write anything short

Here in this diary I write you visions of my summer, it was the best I ever had…

The dogeared, weathered pages told their age beneath his fingertips, speaking their tales through skin. Smudged ink seeped through the yellowing paper, penned words of a different time etched to hold their memory. 

His fingers danced across them as though reading braille, trying to feel the words the way he had when he'd written them. So much time had passed, so much had changed, this book felt like it was from a different lifetime.

If he closed his eyes he could feel himself there. He could feel the way the hot Vegas sun beat down on him, causing little beads of sweat to roll down his face, feeling it tightening his skin. He could sense the pen in his hand as he scrawled down his thoughts, committing them to these pages. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Just writing.” 

“Writing what?” 

“Memories. I want to remember this summer.” 

“You have an eidetic memory, dork.” 

He could feel the gravel beneath him, hear the occasional passing vehicle on the freeway whilst hanging out at truck stops just to pass the time. 

He could see fireworks illuminating the sky in desolate parking lots, hear their crackle and bang as they exploded and then disappeared. 

He could hear the thrum of the eighties songs through tinny speakers, even if he never really enjoyed them. He could feel the droplets of water on his frazzled skin from the splash back of a body diving into the hotel pool which was not strictly open to the public. 

It was another life, one he’d long ago left behind but still carried pieces of it with him. 

I guess when it comes down to it, being grown up isn't half as fun as growing up…

“Whatcha got there?” 

A voice snapped him out of his nostalgia and he quickly closed the old book and looked up from his desk. He blinked a few times to try and bring himself back to the present, back from memory lane which he’d started to get lost down. 

Spencer Reid was not known to be a sentimental man, in all honesty he had few good memories from his past to be wistful over. And now was not the time to start. 

Luke had an amused smirk on his lips as he looked down at the younger man and the old, tattered journal on his desk. 

“Oh, uh, it’s nothing.” Spencer swallowed with a shake of his head. 

“Looked like a diary.” Luke’s smile grew, his intense dark eyes full of mirth. “I saw a date in the corner? August twenty ninth two thousand and two. You'd have been…”

“Twenty two. I was twenty two. The summer before I joined the BAU.” He sighed as he spoke, not thrilled to be sharing this part of his life with Luke. 

It was unfounded, given that it was probably the happiest time of his life. He wasn’t quite sure why he didn’t want his friends to know about it. 

There was something about keeping the memory pure, not having it sullied by outsiders. That secret summer belonged only to the two people who had lived it. 

“I didn't peg you for a journaler.” Luke shrugged. 

“I’m not usually. I don’t really know why I kept a diary that summer.” 

That wasn’t entirely true. He’d kept a record of those days in case, for whatever reason, his memory failed him. If something happened to cause his brain to forget, that was one time in his life he wanted to ensure he’d never lose. 

And since his mothers diagnosis, it was an entirely real possibility that one day he may forget. There were many moments in his life he’d like to be able to neglect, his drug addiction, Gideon’s death, prison; but the summer of ‘02 was not one of them. 

In truth he’d forgotten all about the journal. It wasn’t until his mothers move to DC when he’d been going through old boxes of her stuff that he’d found it. 

“Can I read it?” Luke’s smile turned cheeky, he already knew what the answer would be but he was just trying his luck. 

As expected, Spencer scowled, grabbing the diary and holding it close to his chest as if he believed Luke might try to snatch it from his desk.

“Absolutely not.” He wrapped it tightly against his body. 

“Ooh there’s some juicy stuff in there.” Luke chuckled.

“Don’t be crude.” Spencer scoffed but his cheeks started to redden, conveying the truth. 

“Oh man, I’m right aren’t I?” Luke’s laughter grew. 

It increased in volume enough to grant the attention from the others who had been silently working away at their desks. 

“What’s going on?” JJ perked up, her blonde head of hair appearing behind her computer monitor. 

“Reid’s got a sex diary.” Luke spoke over his shoulder to the whole bullpen.

“I most certainly do not.” His cheeks burned with his embarrassment and he shrunk a little in his chair. 

“Reid? Spencer Reid?” Tara stood from her desk, eyebrow cocked in her blatant confusion. “No way, I don’t believe that.”

“Good, because it's not true.” He held the journal closer to his chest. 

“He’s hiding something in there, there’s a reason he won’t let me read it.” Luke scoffed. 

“Did it occur to you that some people don’t enjoy sharing their entire life story?” Spencer grumbled.

By now JJ and Matt were on their feet too, and the three other agents closed in on his desk. He was thankful at least Emily, Rossi and Garcia were in their respective offices. He shrunk lower in his chair, wishing he were able to simply vanish into thin air. 

“Oh he’s definitely hiding something.” Tara folded her arms across her chest, eyebrow still raised in a combination of suspicion and delight.

“So what if I am? I’m entitled to my secrets.” Spencer complained. 

“The last time you kept a secret from us you ended up in prison.” JJ’s shoulders slumped, wincing a little at her own words. 

“This isn’t…it’s not like that.” He shook his head. “It’s just memories okay? Memories of a great summer I had before I joined the bureau and I’d like to keep them to myself.” 

“Oh it’s totally a sex diary.” Matt chuckled heartily. 

“For the love of…” Spencer trailed off, pushing himself to his feet and tucking the journal under his arm. “I really don’t want to talk about this. Can you please just respect my privacy for once? I know how hard that is for you guys.” 

“Ouch,” JJ pouted. “Sorry for caring.” 

“Jennifer, we both know this has nothing to do with you caring about me.” He clucked, pushing past the gaggle of his friends and marching out of the bullpen. 

He felt them watching him, muttering under their breaths as he walked away. He hurried down the corridor out of view until he pushed his way into the men’s bathroom. 

He slumped into a stall and sat down on the closed lid of the toilet. Placing the old leather bound diary in his lap he ran his fingers over the cover. 

He didn’t know why he’d let himself get so worked up over a stupid journal. Except it wasn’t stupid, far from it. It was his collection of memories from a life he wished he could go back and relive. 

The twenty two year old who’d put pen to these pages was naive and innocent, his whole life ahead of him. The boy he’d been back then didn’t know of the horrors he was yet to face. It was a much simpler time and he wanted to be able to cling to that without his friends being involved. 

For fourteen years his team had been privy to every moment of his life, good and bad. Was it so wrong that Spencer wanted to just keep this one thing to himself? 

He huffed out a staggered breath, wishing not for the first time that just cared a little less. It made sense when he was younger, he’d been green when he joined the FBI and the team had treated him with kid gloves, probably rightfully so. But he was a grown man now, older and more worldly, he didn’t need them treating him like a child.

He cracked the spine of the journal, opening it up to the first page and continued caressing the worn page with his fingers. The diary began at the end, retrospectively writing of his adventures during the last week of that summer when he realised he didn’t want those memories to escape him. 

August 29th 2002

Here in this diary I write you visions of my summer, it was the best I ever had…that unspoken feeling of knowing that right now is all that matters.

Here in this diary he had meticulously journalled everything that transpired during his last few months in his hometown and how those moments had changed his life forever. He cautiously turned the page, careful not to tear the aged paper. 

He felt the heat rising, the sun high in the sky. He became aware of the somewhat blistering concrete beneath him, the occasional sound of passing cars. He could make out the scent of sunblock in the air, chlorine from nearby backyard swimming pools. 

Brushing his digits across the page he was transported away from Virginia, away from the bathroom on the sixth floor Quantico office. As he closed his eyes, the Las Vegas summer stretched out before him.

June 2nd 2002

The temperature edged over a hundred two days ago and the AC hasn’t worked in three years. Really need to sell the house, I must look into that when I get to DC. Mom hasn’t lived here since I sent her off to Bennington and this was the last summer I’d be needing it. 

It was cooler to sit outside, despite the humidity, it was preferable to the stuffy house with no AC. I planned to go to the library, basking in its glorious air conditioning unit but after stepping outside and immediately feeling the sweat gathering all over my skin, I decided against walking for five miles in this heat. 

And boy would I be glad for that decision. 

I’m not sure what it was that tore my attention away from the Great Gatsby that morning. I had this feeling, this inexplicable feeling running through my veins and forcing the hairs on the back of my neck to stand to attention. 

And when I looked up, there she was. It was as though she was floating, drifting so effortlessly across the street I was sure her feet didn’t touch the ground. She regarded me curiously, most people did. She was unblinking, a slow and cautious smile building on her lips. 

I simply stared back in awe at this angelic creature heading my way, never letting her gaze falter from me. I was stunned into silence as she approached up the front path, head tilting to the side as she analysed me. 

She invited herself closer, up the three concrete stairs before dropping to the top step right next to me, opening her mouth and inquisitively speaking…

“What are you reading?” You smiled at him in what you hoped to be an amicable manner, but nonetheless his back straightened as if you posed a threat to him. 

“Uh…” he swallowed thickly, his Adams apple bobbing. “Me?” 

“Yes you.” You laughed. “Who else would I be talking to?” 

The peculiar man looked around like he expected someone else to be sitting on his stoop with the two of you. He scratched at the back of his neck nervously. 

“I don’t…I don’t know.” He rolled his chapped lip between his teeth. 

“I’m Y/N.” You shook your head, still laughing a little at his obvious awkwardness. 

“Sp-Spencer.” He stuttered. 

“Nice to meet you, Spencer.” You nodded curtly. “I’m house sitting for my aunt for the summer, what’s good to do around here?” 

Her smile could have lit up the whole night sky, her laugh the sweetest sound I’d ever been lucky enough to hear. She was summer, she would still be summer in the dead of winter. She was magnetic, effervescent. 

She was the first drop of rain after a long drought, she was those first few seconds in the morning when you wake up where you momentarily forget all of life's problems. She was…

“Reid, you in here? We got a case.” Luke’s voice broke him out of his revere, eyes flickering off of the page up to the closed stall door. 

“I’ll be right there.” He croaked, closing the diary again. 

He closed his eyes and inhaled until his lungs were full. He counted to five in his head and listened for the door to close before he slowly exhaled. He repeated the action three more times before he trusted himself to stand. 

He swore he could still smell your perfume as he forced his way out of the bathroom and back to reality. 

***

June 14th 2002

All the nights we stayed up talking, listening to 80's songs. It still brings a smile to my face. 

Her aunt's house, which I came to learn was just up the street and had a new, state of the art AC unit fitted. The next two weeks we spent nearly everyday there listening to her favourite songs on the old stereo, most of which I’d never heard before. 

The likes of Van Halen, The Cure, AC/DC and The Pixies played on repeat while she quizzed me on my life and I on hers. She was from San Francisco and her aunt was on vacation so she’d offered to house sit for the summer. She was a year younger than me at twenty one and fresh out of college with no idea where she was heading next.

I kind of envied her, she was a free spirit, she could go anywhere she wanted, do anything she wanted. And for whatever reason, she chose to spend her summer with me.

You hummed along to the music, Where is My Mind by the Pixies encompassing the room. You laid on your back on the couch, your feet in Spencer’s lap and the AC sending its cool waves towards you.

You cradled the blunt between your fingertips, every now and again raising it to your lips and sucking on it. The room was filling with smoke, the smell of it alone enough to make Spencer a little light headed. 

“You sure you don’t want any of this?” You spoke with a lungful smoke. 

“I’m good, really.” Spencer smiled his tight-lipped smile you’d grown accustomed to the last few weeks. 

“It would be out of your system before you start your big government job.” You giggled. 

“It’s not just that.” He shook his head. “Smoking marijuana at our age while our brains are still technically developing can affect IQ. A study showed that those who started smoking pot before twenty five lost six to eight IQ points by middle age.” 

You sat up on your elbows, your eyebrows deeply furrowed at him.

“You think it’s really going to affect your life so much if you lose a couple of IQ points, Doc?” Your lip quipped up into a smile. 

“I don’t want to risk it.” Spencer noted your slightly bloodshot eyes. 

You took another long drag, the sound of the paper crackling as it burnt filled his ears. You breathed it in before slowly exhaling the smoke out into the room. 

“Hmm,” you hummed in content, dropping the half smoked blunt into a little glass dish on the coffee table. “Now I feel light as a feather.” 

“You could get that feeling in many other ways. The main psychoactive ingredient, THC, is simply stimulating the part of the brain that responds to pleasure. It’s releasing dopamine which is what’s giving you that euphoric feeling.” He told you almost sternly.

You cocked an eyebrow at him, sitting up further so you could get a good look at him. 

“Pleasure, huh?” You clicked your tongue. 

“Yeah,” he swallowed. “It’s the same way you would respond to food or…”

“Or?” Your lip twitched.

“Other pleasurable activities.” He swallowed again, his cheeks turning slightly pink. 

You swung your legs off of his lap and shuffled closer to him on the couch. You saw him swallow yet again, noticed his chest heave with a deep breath. 

The closer you got to him the more you could feel the nerves rolling off of him in waves and you dared move so you were straddling his lap. 

Your knees pressing either side of his thighs, you wrapped your arms around his neck and a hagged breath left between his pouty lips. His cheeks were a deep crimson colour now and from this position in his lap you knew exactly why. 

“Spence?” You whispered as he looked at you in embarrassment. 

It would be painfully obvious from where you were sitting that he was aroused and he felt so incredibly vulnerable in that moment. 

“Yes, Y/N?” He croaked. 

“What other pleasurable activities are you talking about?” 

“I think…I think you know.” 

“Hmm let’s pretend I don’t.” You smiled coyly. “After all, I’ve probably knocked off a few IQ points right? What other pleasurable activities?” 

You rolled your hips a little in his lap and Spencer mewled at the sensation. This was the closest he’d ever come to having someone other than himself touch him and he felt dizzy. He felt so dizzy that when he spoke, he wasn’t sure he’d even meant to let the word slip off his tongue. 

“S-sex.” He breathed, the smile on your face growing in approval. 

“Well now, that does sound more appealing than smoking.” You edged your face closer to him, rolling your hips into his lap once more. 

He smelt your perfume and the pot on your breath. He felt like his skin was on fire and he couldn’t form a coherent thought. 

A moment before you lips touched his, the sound of a phone ring cut through the room and you sprung apart suddenly. 

Spencer remained sitting on the couch while you ambled over to the landline. He watched you go, half wondering if he’d imagined the whole thing. 

But the erection still visible through his slacks begged to differ. 

***

He returned the journal to his satchel as the jet came into land near Dallas. He knew word of his mysterious diary had reached Emily and Rossi and the whole team had been watching him read on the flight. 

He tried to cast his memories to the back of his mind and focus on the case, people were being murdered and that had to take precedence over his nostalgic thoughts. 

Emily sent him and Rossi to the morgue and Spencer tried to pretend he was focused on a case file while Rossi drove them. He could see the older man looking at him in his peripheral vision. 

Thankfully Rossi did not ask him about the journal even though Spencer knew he wanted to. 

It was in the back of his mind all day and after he retired to his hotel room and showered, he found himself thumbing through to the next page. 

July 1st 2002

Breaking into hotel swimming pools, and wreaking havoc on our world. Does it make me completely dumb that I would follow her to the ends of the earth? 

I knew it was a bad idea, but I just can’t say no to her. She said she had something fun planned and so like an idiot I came along. 

I didn’t say anything when we jumped the fence. It was around eleven pm and all the lights around the pool were out, the stars and the moon reflecting on the still water. 

I still didn’t say anything when she started stripping down to her underwear, mostly because it rendered me speechless. The sight of her in nothing but that skimpy black lace lingerie caused me to forget my own name and I’m sure I just stared at her slack jaw. 

It’s been a few weeks since I think she tried to kiss me and she hasn’t said anything about it. I’m starting to think I misread the situation entirely. 

At least I was, until she stripped off her clothes by the side of the pool and curled her finger at me, beckoning me closer.

“You fancy a dip, Spencer?” Your voice was breathy and he followed your motion to come closer. 

“Uh, won’t we get in trouble?” He padded forward all the same. 

“Only if we get caught.” You giggled, reaching for him as soon as he was close enough. 

You gripped him by the lapels of his shirt to tug him forward before your fingers glided towards the top button. He stared at you without a word while you effortlessly popped the buttons one by one. 

Once you’d gotten the last button undone your hands moved to his shoulders and you helped push the fabric down his arms until it dropped to the floor. 

He was painfully skinny but it didn’t stop him from subconsciously sucking in his small stomach. Your eyes grazed up and down his torso, taking in every inch of skin.

He felt hot beneath your gaze despite the fact the temperature plummeted at night. He felt self conscious, not worthy of your eyes on him. But when you met his gaze again you were smiling. 

When your hands landed on the button of his slacks his breath hitched and his legs wobbled slightly. You giggled again, a sound that had become Spencer’s favourite melody over the past month. 

You made quick work of the button and zipper before hooking your fingers in the side of his pants and shimming them down his legs. 

Spencer stayed still and silent while you undressed him until his pants pooled at his feet and he kicked off his converse so he could remove them completely. 

His hands darted in front of him, trying to hide the exceedingly noticeable tenting in his tight boxers. He could tell you knew what he was trying to hide by the playful smile now on your lips. 

It was an all too regular occurrence around you. You only had to glance at him a certain way and he would be standing at full attention. It wasn’t his fault, you were unfairly beautiful. 

Suddenly you turned your back on him, floating as you so often did towards the pool. Before Spencer’s brain could catch up you were diving into the still water, causing ripples to roll out across the pool. 

A few droplets splashed up onto his face and chest. While you were submerged he moved closer to the edge and slipped into the cool water before you could have a chance to scrutinise his body again. 

When you emerged you wiped your hair off your face and found Spencer in the pool, leaning back against the wall. The water wasn’t too deep but he crouched down so it was covering him up to his chest. 

You waded towards him, eyes sparkling from the moonlight. He pushed himself back against the side of the pool, his nerves written all over his face. 

“Everything okay, Doc?” You asked as you neared him. 

“Fine, just fine.” He nodded stiffly. 

“You sure about that?” You cocked an eyebrow at him, moving dangerously closer. 

“Hmm mmm.” He tried to insist but you weren’t buying it. 

Your eyes were dark by the time you were right in front of him, almost black. The smile on your face was sinful and it made Spencer’s knees weak. 

No one had ever looked at him the way you were looking at him at that moment. He may be naive but he knew exactly what that look meant. And as if to prove that point, your right hand disappeared under the water and seconds later it was palming him through his underwear.

A pathetic whimper left his lips at the contact even though there was a layer of wet fabric between him and your hand. 

Your smile grew at his reaction, your other hand now moving to grip his shoulder. Spencer’s arms remained at his sides, his breathing already heightened. 

“Spencer?” You whispered. “Has anyone ever touched you like this before?”

He rolled his lip between his teeth and shook his head dispondantly.

“No,” he confessed. “I, uh, I’ve never even…kissed anyone before.” 

He felt the heat spreading to his cheeks and he was painfully aware of your hand still palming him. Your smile turned a little sad, pitying almost. 

“You want to change that?” Your voice was quiet, barely a whisper. 

“Y-yes.” He nodded. “Yes p-please.” 

“So polite,” you stepped even closer. “Such a good boy.” 

When your lips finally touched his, he whined against them, feeling an explosion of emotions in one simple action. Your tongue easily made its way into his mouth and your hand moved from his shoulder to the back of his head. 

You kissed him fiercely, exploring his mouth with hunger. Spencer didn’t do much of anything, simply stood limply while you kissed the air from his lungs. 

He continued to whine against your lips when your hand started moving around his shaft. His hips started to rock against you of their own accord and he so desperately wished there wasn’t a piece of fabric in his way. 

As though you could read his mind your hand shifted and your fingers trailed across his stomach just about the waistband of his boxers. He moaned deeply and you pulled back from the kiss, a questioning expression on your features.

“Can I?” You panted as you spoke, nodding your head downwards. 

All Spencer could do was nod dumbly in response. 

You smiled before leaning in to kiss him again, somehow more ferociously than before. When your hand slid inside the sodden material of his boxers and wrapped around his length an animalistic moan erupted from his lips, swallowed down in your own mouth. 

Your small hand couldn’t quite reach all the way around his thick shaft as you started moving up and down on it. His hips started bucking harder than before, telling you he enjoyed it. 

His brain was mush, he couldn’t form a single coherent thought except how phenomenal your hand felt. His lack of awareness allowed him a little more confidence and he finally moved his arms, his hands finding your face and holding you while he kissed you. 

You smiled against his lips, the water started to lap around your bodies with your movements. You kept up a steady pace as you stroked him while removing one of his hands from your face. 

He let you guide his hand over the planes of your body until it was situated between your legs. He inhaled sharply, having to tear his lips away from yours. 

You were both panting as you looked at each other, his breathing staggered due to the way you were touching him. His hand was still between your legs, ghosting outside of your panties.

“You…you’re sure?” He breathed erratically. 

“Very.” You nodded, increasing your speed and eliciting another feral moan from Spencer. 

“I…I’ve never done this before.” 

“You strike me as a quick learner.” You smirked. 

“F-fuck…” he mumbled. “I…I am.” 

“Make me feel good, Spence. Be a good boy for me.” 

Your words of praise made him hiss, bucking hard into your hand. It was enough encouragement for him to inch your panties aside before his fingers slid beneath the fabric. 

You were surprised to say the least when one of his digits quickly found your clit and started rubbing it deftly, as though he’d done this hundreds of times before. 

Your eyes widened and your mouth fell open, your grip on him faltering for a second at the sensation. 

“Fuck…” you whined, trying to focus on your strokes. “You…you sure you’ve never done that before?” 

“P-positive.” He nodded, his knees buckling as he felt precome leaking from his head. “S’good?” 

“So good, baby. So good.” You crashed your lips together again as he increased his speed, rubbing your sensitive bud like he’d been doing it his whole life. 

You squeezed the base of his shaft before matching his speed with your strokes. You were moaning into each other's waiting mouths, water frantically lapping around your bodies. 

You whined when his finger disappeared from your clit but soon two of his digits were swiping through your folds. When you felt them pressed against your entrance, begging for access, you nibbled on his bottom lip and squeezed his cock again telling him to continue. 

You moaned in unison as his two long, slender fingers entered you. Spencer felt as though he might pass out at the sensation as his fingers pushed all the way inside of you. 

He felt your shift and move around him, your walls fluttering against his digits. That combined with the way you were frenziedly pumping him caused his stomach to tighten with the telltale signs of his impending orgasm. 

“Oh my gosh you feel so incredible.” He whined, plunging his fingers deeper inside you. 

You felt him twitching in your hand, still lazily rocking into your touch. 

“Are you close, baby?” Your thighs squeezed around his hand. 

“Y-yes.” He admitted, fingers coniniting to move in and out of you, desperate to give you as much pleasure as you were bestowing upon him. 

“Come for me, Spence. Come for me.” 

He whimpered again, the pressure building in the pit of his stomach and he couldn’t hold back any longer even if he wanted to. 

With a staggered moan his hips jut forward as he came in the pool, while you stroked him through his first orgasm not at his own hand. 

***

In a hotel room just outside of Dallas, Spencer narrowly managed to move the journal out of the way just in time for him to spill his load over his own hand. 

He fell back against the lumpy pillows, breathing heavily and his hand still slowly moving up and down his spent shaft. 

He glanced at the diary through hazy eyes and shook his head, removing his hand from his cock and wiping his seed on the bed sheet.

He swore he could feel your hand there even after all these years, feel the water splashing around his naked torso. 

He could feel you around his fingers, the way you clenched tighter as you came not so long after he did. 

He could still feel the weight of your body as you fell against him in the pool, head nuzzling into the crook of his neck as you panted heavily into his wet skin. 

Things had been so much simpler then, he sometimes yearned for those days. A part of him wished he hadn’t found the journal in the first place then maybe he wouldn’t have found himself sucked down this particular rabbit hole. 

Despite the memories swarming his brain he fell asleep without even cleaning himself off, one hand on his rapidly beating heart and the other clutching the battered diary. 

***

July 4th 2002

Lighting fireworks in parking lots, illuminates the blackest nights. Cherry cokes under this moonlit summer sky. 

I suggested going to an organised event for the Fourth of July celebrations but she insisted that we have our own. 

She brought a ton of fireworks, it was a wonder she didn’t blow a hand off that night, fumbling to light them whilst dragging on a blunt.

But I simply watched her from the back of her aunt’s old VW Camper, sipping on my coke in absolute awe of her every move. 

Since our pool escapades the other day, every time I look at her I get chills. Every time I catch sight of her I think of the way she felt as she touched me, as I touched her…

She hasn’t even so much as kissed me since and I’m partially wondering if it was all a vivid dream. At least I was until tonight. 

You sauntered back over towards the open back doors of your camper where Spencer sat cross legged on a blanket. 

Seconds later an array of fireworks erupted in the sky over the abandoned parking lot, the sounds and the colours a feast for the senses. 

But you weren’t watching them. You were watching him. 

You crawled into the back of the van, right into his lap, straddling him as you took a long pull on the joint. You inhaled the smoke and tossed the butt over your shoulder before placing your hands on his shoulders. 

When you kissed him the smoke filtered out of your mouth and into his but he didn’t care. His arms wrapped around your waist while your tongues explored each other's mouths. 

You guided him backwards so he was laying down, his cock already fully erect and pressing against you. You laid on top of him and continued to kiss him fiercely. 

His hands found purchase on your back, gently holding you close. You were grinding against him causing him to moan into your mouth and squirm beneath you. 

He knew where this would inevitably lead if he let it. He wanted to, he didn’t exactly relish the idea of being a virgin forever and you were the first woman to ever show him this kind of attention.

But he didn’t want to just be another guy to you. He didn’t want to just be a quick lay you’d forget all about. And inevitably that’s what would happen.

It wasn’t something the two of you talked about often but at the end of summer you were going back to San Francisco and he was going to DC. If he slept with you that’s all it would ever be. And he didn’t want that. 

You continued to kiss him and grind against him but his intrusive thoughts got the better of him and all the blood that had previously been flowing south rerouted itself. He didn’t even realise until you sat back and looked at him curiously.

“Is everything okay?” You breathed heavily, lips slightly swollen from the kiss.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t it be?” He frowned up at you. 

“Uh…” Your eyes flicked down towards his crotch at the same time he realised he was completely flaccid. 

His cheeks burnt and he cursed his overactive brain. 

“I’m sorry.” He shook his head, trying to sit back up. 

You slid off of his lap and sat next to him while he drew his legs close to his body. 

“It’s okay if you don’t want to do this. I’m sorry if I come on a little strong.” You shrugged meekly. 

“It’s not that I don’t want to. I just…I don’t want to lose my virginity to someone I’m never going to see again once summer is over.” He cringed at his own words, at how needy and sad he sounded. 

Your expression turned pitying and it made him feel even more stupid. 

“I get it.” You smiled softly. “Don’t be embarrassed.”

“It’s kinda hard not to be.” He buried his head into his knees and hugged his arms around his shins. “I’m sure most guys, normal guys, would jump at the chance to be with a woman as beautiful as you. No one’s ever looked at me the way you do, I was always so much younger than my peers so it made sense. I wasn’t waiting or anything, not deliberately. But now the opportunity has presented itself, I don’t think I’m the casual sex kind of guy. God that sounds so lame.” 

You were smiling to yourself at how adorable he was. With his face against his knees his words were muffled but you caught the gist of them. 

You shuffled closer to him and placed your hands on his cheeks, guiding his face back up so he would look at you. 

“I think that’s kinda noble.” You whispered.

“I think the word you’re looking for is sad.” He huffed. 

“No, it’s not.” You let go of his face. “I understand, Spencer. I wish I’d waited, I wish I’d waited for someone like you.” 

He let you wrap your arms around him and he leant against your chest while you held him. Off in the distance fireworks continued to illuminate the sky, the far off sound of their explosions a strange comfort. 

***

Spencer rubbed his eyes with his palms somewhat aggressively after almost an hour of staring at the map of their unsubs hunting ground. 

Despite falling asleep quickly last night his peace had been short lived and he’d woken less than two hours later and couldn’t get back to sleep. 

He didn’t know why he was letting the diary affect him in such a way, shouldn’t it have the opposite result? Those entries were from the best days of his life, but maybe it served as a reminder that he could never go back to that time.

He wasn’t that naive kid anymore, he’d suffered one too many traumas in his life to ever be that kid again. Back then his most difficult decision was whether or not to have sex with a beautiful woman. He longed to have such trivial problems. 

He’d felt so stupid after the night of the fourth of July he had avoided you for two weeks after. He’d wasted what precious time the two of you had together feeling idiotic over his decision to turn you down and hidden out in the public library just to circumvent any further interaction with you. 

He turned to face the room, realising he was alone in the small meeting room. Last he checked JJ and Luke were at the table going over files, when had they left? 

He frowned to himself, reaching for his satchel and pulling the journal out, flipping to the next page. 

July 19th 2002

Being grown up isn't half as fun as growing up, these are the best days of our lives. The only thing that matters is just following your heart, and eventually you'll finally get it right.

He closed his eyes with a shake of his head. Wasn’t that the painful truth? He’d written that particular entry with a smile on his face like the cat that got the cream. That date had been the best of his whole whirlwind summer. 

After stewing in his stupidity for two weeks he had shown up at your aunt's house unexpected and uninvited. You’d barely let him inside before he’d kissed you. And it wasn’t long at all before he was leading you back to the couch. 

“Spence, what’s going on?” You panted, looking up at him from where you laid on the couch. 

“Do you really need me to spell it out for you?” He was fumbling a little with the buttons of his shirt, hands noticeably shaking. 

“But I thought…you said you didn’t want this? And then you don’t talk to me for weeks and now you-”

“I was overthinking, I do that a lot. But I don’t want to overthink this.” He finished unbuttoning the shirt and dropped it to the floor before climbing on top of you and kissing you again.

“You’re sure?” You mumbled against his lips.

“Extremely.” He replied.

He snapped the journal closed before he could get carried away. He didn’t exactly go into graphic detail of what transpired on your aunt’s couch that day but it was certainly not safe for work material. 

He didn’t need to read the words anyway, he’d memorised everything about that day. He learnt by heart the way your skin felt against his, the way the two of you melted together as though your bodies somehow became one. He’d retained every little detail of how you felt, every tiny movement of your body as he’d made love to you. 

He couldn’t forget even if he wanted to. 

Just as he was slotting the diary back into his satchel, trying not to get caught up in the blissful memory, the door opened and JJ strolled in carrying two take out coffee cups. She smiled at him, handing him one of the drinks. He smiled at her in thanks.

Her eyes flitted to his open bag and the diary nestled inside. When she looked back at him she had an amused expression on her face.

“So, sex diary, huh?” She chuckled lightly.

“It is nothing of the sort.” He rolled his eyes.

“Alvez is convinced otherwise.” 

“Well Alvez doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

“Summer of oh-two right?” She narrowed her eyes on him, the way she did when she was trying to profile him.

“Yeah.” He took a sip of coffee. 

“Wasn’t that-”

“Yes.” He cut her off. 

The summer I met the love of my life. 

He’d told JJ snippets from that summer, she was the only one who he’d ever told. She knew as much as he’d met a wonderful woman who he’d lost his virginity to and over the course of a summer had fallen in love with her. As far as he knew she’d never told anyone. 

“So why has it gotten you so tetchy? I would have thought you’d like to relive those days?” She slid into one of the chairs sipping her own coffee but her scrutinising gaze stayed on him.

He let out a haggard sigh, taking a seat next to her and using his free hand to swipe his hair back off of his face.

“Do you ever feel like the best days of your life have passed you by?” He found himself asking. 

JJ’s expression softened, a melancholy smile adorned on her lips. She sat forward slightly in the chair.

“Is that really what you think?” She placed a gentle hand on his knee and she felt him tense up at her touch.

“Maybe, I don’t know.” He wiggled his nose, a gesture he did when he was uncomfortable. “I guess I just miss being that carefree.”

“Spencer Reid, carefree? Can’t picture it.” JJ laughed around her cup.

“Fine, maybe not carefree.” He chuckled too. “But not…this. I’m worried I’m never going to bounce back from prison. I went to therapy, I took the medication, I should be over it by now.”

“Spence, you have PTSS, that doesn’t just go away. You know as well as I do, probably better, that the symptoms can be managed, that it can remain dormant for months, even years. But the trauma you suffered is what evoked your PTSS and that doesn’t leave you. You’ll probably always be dealing with it in one way or another.” JJ squeezed his knee before Spencer moved out of her touch. 

He knew what she was saying was right and that’s what made it harder to hear. PTSS was something he would always live with, something that could always be triggered in the future. He’d created coping mechanisms, dealt with his trauma but it didn’t make it go away, it would never just vanish into thin air. He could never undo the damage that had already been done. 

“I thought reading that journal would help me feel like my old self but it’s having the opposite effect. Because I’m never going to be that kid again.” He shook his head sadly. 

“And why would you want to be?” JJ scoffed.

“Excuse me?” He frowned at her.

“Spence, I knew you at twenty two. You were painfully shy and awkward. It took you years to be able to look me in the eye. You’ve changed so much in the years I’ve known you and that’s not a bad thing. You’re better at your job, you’re a better man now than you were at twenty two, you have to see that?” She hoped her words were getting through, hoped he would listen to her before he fell into a self pity spiral he may never get out of. 

He exhaled shakily, taking another sip of coffee while he tried to come up with a response. But he didn’t have to, as soon the door was opening again and Luke entered the room. And Spencer quickly jumped up and returned to his map, effectively shutting down any further conversation on the subject. 

***

August 6th 2002

Hanging out at truck stops, just to pass the time. Watching the slew of cars fly by on the freeway, eating bags of chips while she tossed stones out into the rolling desert beyond us. 

“Remind me again why we’re here?” He asked you as you flung another stone off into the distance. 

You turned to face him, both sitting in the gravel, leaning up against the side of the truck stop building. 

“Why not?” You quipped. 

“There are countless other more interesting things in Las Vegas than sitting at a truck stop. You’re only here a few more weeks and I thought you wanted to see the city?” 

“I have seen the city.” 

“You’ve seen abandoned parking lots, old motel swimming pools and the inside of your aunt’s house.” He shook his head. 

“Hmm,” you mused. “I have been very acquainted with her ceiling these past few weeks.” You winked at him and his cheeks immediately burned at the insinuation. 

It wasn’t a lie. The last couple of weeks the two of you had barely left your aunt’s house in lieu of making the most of each other's company whilst wearing as few clothes as possible. 

Spencer wasn’t strictly complaining about that, sex with you was one of the wonders of the world and he’d happily do it for the rest of his life. But he was painfully aware of what little time you had left together. 

“It’s a pretty good ceiling.” He swallowed thickly, having had his own share of experiences in which he was staring at that ceiling too. 

You giggled and it was literally music to his ears. You tossed another stone before suddenly getting to your feet. 

Spencer followed suit, brushing the dirt off the back of his slacks. You had a mischievous glint in your eyes as you took hold of his hand and started leading him around the side of the building. 

“Where are we going?” He asked, not that it really mattered. He’d long ago realised he would follow you anywhere. 

“You’ll see.” You giggled again, giving his hand a squeeze. 

He followed you inside a grimy and slightly dilapidated bathroom, eyebrows furrowed deeply in confusion. 

When you let go of his hand and locked the door, his stomach coiled into knots and his cock immediately started to come to life. 

“Y/N?” He breathed. “What are we…why are we…?” 

You laughed and took him by the hand again, leading him into a stall. The door was coming off of its hinges and the tiled floor was dirty and cracked. You didn’t seem to notice. 

You pushed him up against one of the walls in the stall and started kissing him with ferocity. He kissed you back, trying to ignore the stench of a bathroom that was long overdue for a good clean. 

He didn’t really have much time to dwell on such trivial things however as soon as you were dropping to your knees on the filthy floor and looking up at him through your lashes. 

The simple action had him standing at full attention, his stomach tightly coiled. He’d dreamed of what it would be like to have you go down on him but never imagined it would happen. 

He was too polite to ask and too innocent to assume. But it hadn’t stopped him from imagining it countless times. 

You smiled at him, toying with the button of his slacks and chewing seductively on your lip. 

“Is this what you want, Doc?” You breathed. 

“You have no idea.” He nodded somewhat frantically. 

“Be a good boy and say it for me. I can’t read your mind.” You teased. 

The idea of dirty talking in any way would have normally freaked him out but it had become clear to both of you early on that when you called him a good boy he’d do just about anything. 

“P-please,” he whined, bucking his hips. “Please s-suck my cock.” 

You hissed at his words, teeth sinking deeply into your own lip. 

“Oh you’re so good, Spencer. Such a good boy for me.” You popped the button as a reward. 

“Your good boy.” He agreed with a whimper. 

“My best boy.” You smirked, tugging his pants and boxers down to his knees in one swift move. 

He gasped as the stale air hit his erect cock and pushed himself back against the stall wall. You ran your tongue along your bottom lip as your index finger ghosted up and down the throbbing vein that ran the length of his shaft. 

His knees were already quaking, desperate to feel your lips wrapped around him. Thankfully he didn’t have to wait much longer as soon you bowed your head, parted your lips and took his head into your mouth. 

His eyes rolled back in his head in an instant and the sounds coming from his lips could only be described as feral as you slowly took him all the way in your mouth. 

He yelped when he hit the back of your throat, partly through pleasure and partly through fear he might hurt you. He knew he wasn’t exactly small, not quite so naive as to be blind to the fact he was sporting an above average sized package. 

But to your credit you didn’t even so much as gag and when you looked up at him through your lashes again, nose buried in his pubic hair, he swore you were smiling. 

***

At the back of the jet Spencer tried to rearrange his satchel in his lap to disguise his growing erection from anyone who might pass him by. The mere thought of that day you’d given him his very first blow job was enough to make him strain at the front of his slacks. 

The case in Dallas was wrapped up in just two days despite Spencer’s lack of concentration and he was so pleased to be heading home. 

He closed his eyes, resting his head back against the headrest and trying not to think about that day but failed miserably. 

Getting to come while he had sex with you was incredible, of course, but being inhibited by condoms always left him feeling a little incomplete. But the feeling of coming down your throat, having every last drop of his arousal swallowed down while you smiled at him was out of this world. 

He whimpered a little under his breath, his cock throbbing in the confines of his pants. He grit his teeth together hard and opened his eyes in an attempt to focus on something else. 

August 29th 2002

Here in this diary I write you visions of my summer, it was the best I ever had…that unspoken feeling of knowing that right now is all that matters…

“What are you doing?” You sing-songed, dropping yourself next to him on the couch. 

“Just writing.” He hurried to close the journal before you caught sight of anything.

“Writing what?” Your eyes were sparkling playfully at him. 

“Memories. I want to remember this summer.” He shrugged, hugging the book to his chest. 

“You have an eidetic memory, dork.” 

Three days later, on September first, you’d been leaving Vegas, waving to him from the rear window of the bus taking you to the airport. 

***

September 1st 2002

I don’t know why but some reason I genuinely thought this summer might never end. Time is just a construct right? Maybe this summer could last forever. 

More logically, or maybe less depending on how you look at it, I think I actually thought she’d stay, come with me to DC. I asked her to, although I don’t think she realised I was being serious. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Just writing.” 

“Writing what?” 

“Memories. I want to remember this summer.” 

“You have an eidetic memory, dork.” 

“I know, I’m just scared for this to end. I…Y/N I have fallen in love with you. Don’t go back to California, come to DC with me instead.”

She’d simply laughed as though I’d told the world's funniest joke, patted me on the shoulder and said, “oh wouldn’t that just be the dream, Doc?” 

That was three days ago and she hasn’t brought it up since and neither have I. And today I helped her with her bags to the bus station so she could leave me forever. 

Get on the bus, it's time to go. 

“I am gonna miss you, you know, Doc?” You toyed with his lapel, the sweetest of smiles on your face. “I had a way better summer than I planned for.”

“M-me too.” He croaked, stupidly feeling hot tears brewing behind his eyes. 

“Don’t be sad, you’re leaving for Quantico next week. Your dream job, remember? You're going to be saving lives and kicking ass. You’ll forget all about me.” You smiled. 

“Doubtful.” He huffed. 

The engine of the bus roared to life behind the two of you and your smile turned a little sad. You breathed out before leaning in close and pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. 

“You have to forget me, Doc. Summers over.” You whispered against his lips and before he could reply you were turning away and sauntering to the doors of the bus. 

His heart constricted in his chest, tears encompassing his vision. Nothing about this was fair even though he’d know all along you’d be leaving. It didn’t make it an easier pill to swallow. 

He rubbed his eyes heavily before your face appeared at the back window. You were still smiling but if he didn’t know any better he swore your own eyes were filled with tears. 

The sound of the doors closing caused his chest to tighten further. This was it. It was over. You were leaving. 

As the bus rumbled into gear and started forward, you waved to him and his tears broke free. He raised his hand and waved back while they rolled down his cheeks. 

He stood on the sidewalk waving as the bus started its journey, watching as the only woman he would ever love was cruelly taken away from him. 

***

He rolled his neck as he ascended the stairs to his apartment after a long metro ride home from Quantico. He freed his keys from his satchel, fingertips brushing over the worn leather cover of the journal as he did so. 

He’d never be that innocent twenty two year old again. But was that really such a bad thing? Maybe JJ was right, he was better at his job, he was a better man now than he had been back then. Getting caught up in this wave of nostalgia was foolish.

Ultimately Spencer knew he wouldn’t go back to that age for all the money in the world. That summer might have been the best of his life, but it wasn’t as though his life had been terrible after that. Things sometimes had a way of working themselves out, the universe had its own plan for everyone. 

And despite the trauma thrown his way, the universe hadn’t been entirely merciless towards him. 

He found himself smiling for the first time in days as he slotted the key in his apartment door. He’d been thrown a lot of curveballs in his life, dealt a hand that no one person should have to tackle alone. 

But then he never really had been alone, had he? 

He turned the key and pushed open the door, the light from the lamp next to the couch illuminating the room in the homely glow he loved so much. 

The smell of freshly brewed coffee met his nose, wrapping him in its warmth. He smiled brighter, kicking off his shoes and hanging up his satchel. He pulled out the journal and cradled it under his arm. Then he turned towards the couch and the body sat upon it, his smile grew tenfold. 

“Welcome home, Doc.” 

Get on the bus, it's time to go. 

He continued to wave dumbly as the bus got further away, tears streaking down his cheeks and he feared they may never end. 

He even kept waving when the bus came to an abrupt stop, even carrying on when the doors swung open and you appeared on the sidewalk. 

He finally lowered his hand when you started running towards him, tears rolling from your eyes and a frantic expression on your features. 

“You meant it didn’t you? When you asked me to come to DC with you, you meant it. You meant it and I knew you did but I laughed because I was scared.” You spat out, speaking so fast all your words rolled into one. 

“I did mean it.” He croaked, scared to reach for you in case you vanished in a puff of smoke. “And I also meant it when I told you I love you.” 

“I, uh…” your voice cracked and you scuffed your toe on the concrete. “Would it be utterly crazy if I did come with you to DC?”

“Probably.” He nodded. “Realistically we barely know each other. We might come to find when we learn more about one another that we don’t actually like what we find. Take me, I’m neurotic, I’m a neat freak, a germaphobe. I own too many books, my hair’s too long, my tie is perpetually crooked, I’m-”

“Spencer?” You chuckled through your tears, cutting him off of his rant.

“I ramble when I’m nervous.” He sighed. “But I do know that I love you. And I’m almost positive that I will love every little thing about you, most likely for the rest of my life. So it is probably crazy of you to come to DC with me, but I hope you do it anyway.”

“Spence?” You smiled, wiping at your tears. “I love you too, and I’m positive I will love every little thing about you too. For the rest of my life.” 

Spencer let out a shaky breath of relief and wiped his own tears moments before you fell into his arms and kissed him more fiercely than you ever had before. And you both knew no matter how crazy it was, it also made absolutely perfect sense. 

“Good to be home, angel.” He kissed you, wrapping his free arm around your waist to hold you close. 

He always did that, despite how many years it had been. Regardless of the fact you’d now been together since you were twenty one years old and he was twenty two, in spite of the fact you’d married him, he always felt the need to keep you as close as humanly possible as though afraid he may lose you like he almost had all those years ago.

“Missed you.” You mumbled against his lips. 

“Missed you more.” He replied.

When he broke away from you, your eyes landed on the diary and you laughed, tugging it free of his grip. 

“JJ called me this morning and said you’d been pining over this thing.” You ran your fingers over the worn cover. 

“Best summer of my life.” He smiled as the two of you sank to the couch. 

Spencer wrapped his arm around your shoulder and you nuzzled against him, still toying with the old diary. 

“Mine too. But we can’t live in the past forever. And I don’t know about you but I’m pretty happy right here in the present. And I’m certain our future is going to look pretty damn good.” You took his hand in your free one and brought it to your lips so you could place delicate kisses on his knuckles. 

He’d been so sure as he watched that bus pull away that he would never see you again, that he had lost a piece of his heart forever. The summer of ‘02 he had met the love of his life and he had counted his lucky stars every day that he was also the love of yours. 

You’d stayed by his side through every hurdle. You’d helped him get clean after his addiction which could have torn the two of you apart, held his hand through every single NA meeting and soothed him through withdrawals.

You’d gone to every doctor's appointment with him while he was suffering from debilitating headaches, dried his tears when he thought Emily had died and held his hand at the funeral. You’d felt his anger towards JJ and Hotch when Emily came back from the dead. 

You’d done the same when Gideon died, when Morgan left the team and then Hotch. You’d visited him every day in prison and told him on every visit that no matter how long it took you would be waiting for him when he got out. 

“Until death do us part, Doc. I didn’t take our vows lightly.” 

He held you closer, trying to communicate to you just how much your love and support had meant to him over the years. 

“Have I ever thanked you for getting off that bus?” He sighed in content. 

“Only every single day since.” You giggled, still after all these years his absolute favourite sound in the world. 

He laughed with you, holding you impossibly closer and breathing in the scent of your perfume he still loved so much. 

One summer had turned his whole life upside down. One glorious summer changed everything. That summer and the memories the two of you had created would forever live on, even without that old journal. But you were right, he couldn’t live in the past forever, nor would he want to. His present was as close to perfect as it could possibly be. 

And even in the coldest depths of winter, you would always be the summer of Spencer Reid’s heart. 

Here in this diary I write you visions of my summer, it was the best I ever had.

[idkwhatimdoinghere1655]

Birthday Buddies - Max Verstappen

<word count - 3009>

"OK Maxie, here you go," you said, handing him the envelope with his name scrawled on the front. "Thank you, my love," he smiled, running his fingers under the flap to open it. He eyed you suspiciously as he didn't see a card in the envelope, instead seeing a folded piece of paper. 

Unfolding it, he saw the words written on the page. 'Max, as you know, today is your birthday! You're 26, and have already achieved so much, and I am so proud of you! To find your gift, you have to use your brain a bit... So, your first clue is the place we went on our first date,'

"Making me use my brain... Honestly, my love?" he sighed.

"Yes, now, take me to where we had our first date," you smugly smirked. Max figured he may as well play along. You had planned it all out, and he already knew you had put a lot of effort into it. Plus, it was your birthday too, so he had to listen to you just as much as you listened to him. 

"OK, OK, follow me," Max smiled, taking your hand and leading you out of your apartment. He took you through the winding streets of Monaco, the sun slowly setting over the city. You arrived outside of a small cafe that he took you to, because it was out of the way of the world and you could get to know each other, without the prying eyes of the world on you. 

"Good job Max, you have unlocked the next clue!" You smiled, handing him another, identical envelope as he opened it. "So you could just let me skip straight to the end, but you're choosing not to?" 

"Where's the fun in that? I thought it would be fun to take a trip down memory lane," you said, the both of you remembering the magic that was your first night out. Max thought it was a nice idea, since you had done a lot together since you had started going out, and these were definitely some of his favourites. 

He thought he had blown it after your first date, since he was a stuttering, babbling mess due to how much he liked you. He could barely hold a conversation without being gobsmacked that you were there with him. 

He just couldn't get over how much he liked you, but he thought he had ruined any chances with you. Little did he know, you found it endearing how nervous he was. "Yeah, I guess it is fun," he nodded, unfolding the next piece of paper. 

'Well done, but you're not quite near the finish line yet. Next spot: Where did we have our first kiss?' he read outloud. "You really have to make this a bit harder, these are too easy," he shook his head, taking your hand again. 

It wasn't too far away from the cafe, and it was out on the marina. Some of the boats had their lights on, and the buildings behind you were also lighting up. "You're not in the right spot, hang on," he said, placing his hands on the sides of your arms and shifting you so you were stood by the exact palm tree on the marina yacht club walk. 

"There, we are in the perfect spot," he said, standing in front of you. He remembered gazing at you as you looked out on all of the boats, your eyes glittering under the marina lights. You were entranced by the way the sea sparkled, and how the boats gently bobbed on the surface of the water. 

There was no resisting the urge to kiss you when you noticed him staring, and it was the best decision he had ever made. He drowned in the feeling of holding you close, getting to have his lips against yours. It was like sparks flew whenever he touched you. 

"Yes we are, meaning you get the next clue," you smiled, the memories making you feel drunk with happiness. "OK, this is kind of a two in one," you told him, fishing the next envelope out of your bag. 

'You can't have possibly forgotten this one, because I know I can't, and I don't think you'll ever let me! Take me to the first place that you told me you love me...' he read, a smirk dancing on his lips. "Oh I will never forget this one," he smiled, grabbing your arm.

You were almost reluctant to put this as a clue, since it was a bittersweet memory. Max had taken you to the most beautiful restaurant you had ever seen, and it was still one you frequented now. 

Then, he had taken you on a short walk around the streets of Monaco, before stopping you at a bench by the sea. He was so nervous, since he was about to tell you his feelings. You, on the other hand, were nervous because you were sure you were going to throw up. 

You had felt off all day, but you weren't going to cancel on Max, so you just grinned and bore it. But now, your actions were proving to have consequences. As Max stopped you by the bench, you remembered every little detail of the events that unfolded.

He sat you down, just like he did two years ago, and took your hands. As the both of you thought back to that night, it was as if it were yesterday. Max looked beyond nervous as he looked at you, terrified you weren't going to feel the same way.

Current Max started to stutter, reenacting the moment. "So, Y/N, I... Uhm-" he fumbled, jittering around just like he did. "I love you," he blurted out, and you could have sworn you were back there. "I-" you started, before turning around and pretending to wretch into the bin behind you. 

In the memory, Max didn't care that he could have just ruined everything and simultaneously embarrassed himself, he just cared that you were OK. He rushed to your side, before sitting you back down. 

Now, he said the exact same line he had said, "Me saying I love you wasn't that bad, was it?" he said, and it caused a smile to form on your face both times. "I do love you Max, I just feel awful," you said, leaning into him like you always did.

"That was a weird night," he smiled.

"It was. I was surprised you still loved me after that one, it was the worst timing possible," you laughed, looking at his dazzling smile. "I couldn't fall out of love with you for something so small, I was just relieved you felt the same, my love," he said, waiting for the next clue.

"Next up, the penultimate clue," you said, handing him the final of the normal envelopes for the night. 'Since it's your birthday, it wouldn't be a birthday treasure hunt without sending you to the place where we found out we have the same birthday!' 

"This has been the easiest treasure hunt I have ever been on," he smirked, walking off and expecting you to follow him. You had picked all the spots quite close together, so that you wouldn't have to walk too far. 

"OK, here we are," he said, just stopping in the middle of the street. It had simply come up in conversation when you were walking and talking, and the two of you were both shocked, but also excited. 

Ever since, you both went all out to have the best day the both of you could ask for. "Any reason you sent us here or?" he asked, rocking back and forth on the spot. 

"No, I just thought it was relevant," you shrugged, producing the final envelope of the excursion. "This one might be harder for you, but I don't know," you told him, handing him the golden object. 'Finally, take me to the place where I first fell in love with you,' it said.

Max looked confused, and you could see the cogs turning in his mind. "I would have remembered if you had told me where this was," he said, not moving from the spot as he thought. 

"Would you like a lifeline? You can phone a friend, take the bonus clue, or have me point you in the right direction," you told him. 

"I'll take the bonus clue," he decided, waiting for whatever it was going to be. 

"You have selected: 'Y/N's Bonus Clue!'" you enthusiastically said, revealing a blue envelope with a big, orange question mark adorning the front.  "Thank you, my love," he smiled, opening the envelope and looking more confused. 

'We've already been here today...' he read to you, taking a moment to think. It could have been any of them, really, but he went for the one he thought would be most likely. "OK, follow me," he skeptically said, taking you back to the marina yacht club walk, next to the palm tree where you had shared your first kiss. 

"Unfortunately, that is the first one you have gotten wrong today. You can still use one of your life lines, those being phone a friend or have me point you in the right direction," you told him, glad you hadn't made it too easy on him. "I'll phone a friend," he said.

"Alright then, phone a friend it is," you said, pulling your phone out of your bag and dialing a mystery number. Well, it was a known number, but you had changed the contact name to mystery number. "I thought it was phone a friend?" he said, taking the phone from you. 

"It is," you nodded as if it were obvious, the mystery person picking up on the other end of the line. "Hi, this is Max, I'm doing Y/N's treasure hunt, and I'm stuck on the last clue. I've been told you might be able to help me?" he asked, feeling positively ridiculous. 

"Hi, yes I can," the person tried not to burst out laughing, "You need to take her to the place where you first figured out she was the person you wanted to spend your life with," he laughed, remembering when Max had told him that. He had found it unbelievably cheesy, yet sweet at the same time. 

"OK, thank you Lan- I mean mystery person, I appreciate it," Max giggled, now knowing where to take you. "Right, off we go," he said, leading you to the final destination. He was hoping the mystery person wasn't wrong, because that would be embarrassing. 

"Here we are," he hummed, stopping you back outside the cafe that was your first place. "I think the mystery caller sent me to the wrong place," he sheepishly said, rubbing the back of his neck. Surely you hadn't loved him since your first date, right?

"No, you're at the right spot," you reassured, letting him figure it all out in his head. "What was the clue, Max?" you prompted. 

"The place you first fell in love with me," he recited, the pieces still not fitting together in his mind. "And where are we?"

"The place we had our first date?" he said, and it sounded more like a question due to his unsurity. "Exactly, because I've always loved you. Even if I couldn't put a name to how I felt back then, now I know it was just because I had never loved anyone as much as I love you," you smiled.

"Thank you, my love, that was beautiful," he smiled, trying to contain tears at how much your words had touched him. "As for your gift, it's back at home," you said, and nothing happened. "I said, as for your gift, it's back at home!" you shouted, craning your neck so your voice would carry further around the corner. 

A man appeared from around the corner, a hood pulled up over his eyes. He dropped something by your feet, and you picked it up. "Sorry, excuse me, you dropped this," you said, but the man kept on walking. "Well isn't that strange," you said, handing him the black, leather book that the man had dropped. 

"It is, isn't it?" Max joined in, catching onto the act. He ran opened the cover, immediately realising what this was. It was a photo album, with all the pictures you had taken at those spots you had sent him to today, as well as others from other good times.

He ran his fingers over your features, noting how you hadn't changed at all in the two years you had been together. "There's not much you can do for a man who has it all," you smiled, hoping he liked it. "You're right, I do have it all, I have you," he said, cringing at himself internally.

However, you couldn't hide the goofy smile and blush that tinted your cheeks. "But this is the best gift you could have gotten me besides yourself," he said, flicking through the pages upon pages of memories, forever recorded through colour. 

"I'm glad you like it," you grinned. 

"Now come on, birthday girl, let's get you home," he smiled, tucking the album underneath his arm, looping the other around your waist as he lead you home. When you got to the door of your apartment, you noticed it was open. 

"I swore I locked this when we left..." You said, worried. You didn't want your birthdays to be ruined by someone breaking into your home. "Yeah, you did," he reassured, but he was awful at hiding the smirk on his face. 

Pushing the door open, you saw that the room was lit up in nothing but candles, and relaxing spa music was playing. "I didn't take you to a single spa while we've been globe trotting, so I thought the least you deserved was the at home Spa de Max," he explained, pushing you through the door. 

"Well I already think Spa de Max is better than any spa you could take me anywhere else," you told him, walking into the apartment. "I hope to live up to your expectations, so, go put this on, and your masseuse will be with you when you are ready," he said, handing you a fluffy white robe - just like in a spa. 

"OK," you zealously nodded, excited for what Max had in store. You did just as he had said, changing out of your clothes and into the robe. When you got back out to the living room, you saw the dining room table in the middle of the room, with what looked to be a mattress topper on top.

"Trust me on this, it is actually very comfy," Max said, standing beside the table. "On you get," he told you, and you clambered onto the table. "May I?" he said, slipping his hands into the robe by your shoulders. "Yeah, course," you agreed, letting him slip the soft fabric off your shoulders, and leaving the rest handing on you hips. 

"Lie on your front for me, my love," he said, as you maneuvered onto your front, resting your head on your arms. "Now just close your eyes, and relax," he instructed. Max dabbed some essential oils on his hands, before running them over the span of your back.

As he worked his hands into your muscles, you were trying not to fall asleep. "How did you know we'd be going out?" you asked, wondering how he had managed to sneak someone in to set the house up.

"Because your little helper is also my little helper. He told me we'd be leaving, so I sent him to set all of this up. But, don't worry, he didn't tell me a single detail about what we'd be doing," he reassured you, knowing you wouldn't want the surprise to be ruined.

"Our helper has been a busy boy," you slurred, trying to keep yourself awake by talking. 

"Aww my love, are you tired?" he teased, moving his hands up your neck and across your shoulders. "This is just so nice," you mumbled against your arms.

"Don't fall asleep just yet, you still have a few more experiences in Spa de Max," he said, his hands ceasing their movements. "That'll be hard to beat," you said, sitting up on the table. "Fine, I'll take that as a challenge," he smiled, 

When you stood off the table, Max pulled your robe back up and over your shoulders, tying the belt back up to keep you warm. "Tonight is finally the night I will allow you to put a face mask on me," he said, pushing you onto the couch and sitting next to you. 

"Really?!" You asked, gobsmacked. For some reason, Max had plainly refused to put on a face mask whenever you did, but now was your opportunity. "Yes, anything for the birthday girl," he smiled, even if it was his birthday too. The best gift for him was seeing you happy, after all. 

You tugged your headband out of your hair, slotting it onto his head as his blonde strands were pushed back out of his face. On the coffee table, Max had differents pots of face masks with pre-sliced cucumbers to choose from. "Which one?" he asked.

"I'll go for blue," you nodded as he picked up the blue pot, unscrewing the lid. Max just dipped his fingers in, practically slapping the thick substance onto your face. He slathered it around until he thought he had covered enough of the area. 

"Max, you have put it on so thickly, it'll never dry," you whined, seeing half the container was gone, meaning half was on your face. "Just means you'll be extra refreshed," he smiled, picking up the green pot and handing it to you.

You did the exact same to him, slathering more than two thirds of it onto his face, before trying to put the cucumber slices on his eyes. Before you could, he pulled you in for an affectionate kiss. "Happy birthday, my love," he smiled, tucking some of your hair behind your ear.

"Happy birthday to you too, Max, I love you," 

A/N - Happy birthday to Maxie! And to me so I guess that's fun... Have a great day!

|masterlist|

[bg-brainrot]

"When He’s all but Forgotten How to Love Again" - Astarion x GN!Reader - Series Masterlist

Pairing: Astarion x GN!Reader (Elf!Tav for plot reasons)

Genre: Reincarnation, Angst, Mystery, Slow burn

Rating: Explicit, 18+

Tags: Gender-Neutral Pronouns, POV Second Person, Canon-Typical Violence, cw: blood, cw: Astarion's entire backstory, cw: sex, Eventual Smut, Eventual Romance, Eventual Fluff, Grief, Mourning, Developing Relationship

Series WC: 113k words and ongoing, 21/?? chapters

Summary: An Elf-Tav reincarnation story where Reincarnated!Tav dreams about Astarion in their nightly reveries and eventually seeks him out once they reach maturity. Things definitely totally go well.

Author’s Notes: I'm bringing over some of my multi-chapter fics from AO3, so if you've already read this, ty!! I love you and appreciate you so much! I will continue to add chapters as I format them, but the full fic is available on AO3 here if you're feeling like a binge.

Heads up-- while there will be explicit moments, this is first and foremost focused on romantic tension and yearning, asking the question: 'Would you still love me if I was someone completely different?’ Explicit scenes will be few and far between and very much focused on their feelings. It’s essentially an established relationship slow burn?

This has unascended Astarion, “good” choices are made in the original timeline, Tav needs to be an elf for this to work, but otherwise no specifics on past Tav. Present day Tav is a magic-user.

Chapters:

Chapter 1: Knifes and Nightmares

At 12 years old, you first dream of the Pale Elf. The encounter scares you and sets you on your path forward.

Chapter 2: The Second Encounter with the Pale Elf

Nearly 19, you think you have a handle of your past lives. However, not all of your past lives are created equal.

Chapter 3: What it Means to Love

Now 29, you're still trying to piece together parts of your past. In particular, what exactly was your relationship with Astarion?

Chapter 4: In this Lifetime

Now 99-years-old, you've managed to ignore your worst impulses to run off to Baldur's Gate. One night's reverie finally breaks you.

Chapter 5: Guidance from a Druid

After finally setting off to find Astarion, you receive a confounding memory from your past life. Ignoring what it might mean, you focus on your task and visiting Halsin, one of your past-self's friends.

Chapter 6: The Man of your Dreams

You make your way toward Astarion, trying your best to prepare for the encounter to come.

Chapter 7: Just One Night

You plead your case to the vampire.

Chapter 8: Who You Have Become

You try to learn more of who Astarion's become, while also trying to convince him of who you were.

Chapter 9: Ghosts of You

After he storms off, you try to track Astarion down only to find yourself on a trip down memory lane. Once you do catch his trail, you’re surprised to see where he’s gone.

Chapter 10: Overheard in the Underdark

You traverse a new landscape, looking for Astarion. What you find might be more than you bargain for, and what you hear might be too much to handle.

Chapter 11: An Interrogation

You spend the night in vampire prison and have a difficult conversation.

Chapter 12: The Source of his Pain

As you aim to leave and never look back, Astarion realizes that perhaps *he's* the one that made the mistake.

Chapter 13: And They Were Roommates

You and Astarion try to find a common ground between you. Things are awkward and tentative, and progress is anything but linear.

Chapter 14: A Blossoming Friendship

Now in your second week of living together, you and Astarion have to get past some of the hurdles your first week introduced, all while getting a bit closer along the way.

Chapter 15: More than Friends Pt. 1

Push finally comes to shove. As fun as living in the present is, Astarion forgets that present dangers are still very, very real. Afterward, emotions run high, and you find yourself in a familiar predicament.

Chapter 16: More than Friends Pt. 2

After talking through the previous night's tryst, emotions are confused, pasts are divulged, and everything comes to a head when your heart and soul want different things.

Chapter 17: What We are Now

When you’re left to your own devices, you find yourself knee-deep in mystery. Despite all of this, Astarion never leaves your mind. And perhaps you never leave his.

Chapter 18: Traveling with a Friend

You and Astarion travel together to Waterdeep. Emotions run high as you reconnect and reestablish your boundaries.

Chapter 19: The Wizard’s Tower

After traveling through Waterdeep, you and Astarion finally arrive at Gale's tower. Introductions are made, tours are had, and the relationship between yourself and Astarion continues to remain complicated.

Chapter 20: Sweets and Shopping

After receiving some advice from Gale, you and Astarion spend the day shopping and talking through your friendship.

Chapter 21: Dansarra’s Delights

Your wizard friend gives you a nigh impossible task, and you spend the day trying to find your opening to complete it.

Chapter 22 - TBA

...

[masterjedilenawrites]

Here's To Many More

Clone x Reader Life Day Exchange 2024

Echo x reader | 1.9k words

Content: themes of angst - such as having a difficult year and feeling alone, references to past anxiety attacks, hand scars and tremors, comments about life & death, an almost-kiss, themes of hope and joy at the end

Prompts Used: 

"Breathe. Hi, we found you, just breathe for me, okay?"

"Hey there, take it easy. Your body went through a lot."

generally healing after physical & emotional trauma

Note: Hiya @writersnook11, nice to meet you! Holiday angst - what a fun challenge. I ran with a vibe from a Christmas song that's been hitting me in the feels this season - sort of has a melancholy-turned-hopeful tone to it. I linked it at the end but it's not a requirement to listen, just thought I'd pay credit to my inspiration.

Leaves fluttered and rustled against the pavement as your speeder, contributing to the symphony with its own soft hum, drove over them. The suns setting earlier meant an otherwise bustling neighborhood now lay quiet and peaceful in the dark, adorned in their twinkling holiday lights and warmed by their fireplaces and gathered loved ones.

You drove through the rustling and the twinkling, noticing every detail with an odd, sort of detached calmness. You'd been down these lanes countless times in your life, but it was like it was the first time you were truly seeing everything. All the colors and textures and temperatures. So many homes, full of so many people, living so many lives. There was a whole world out here, outside of your head.

Eventually your own home came into sight. You pulled up next to the first bit of empty curb, just one house away, and killed the engine. The hum of the speeder died down, leaving you in still, quiet air. Cold air. You flexed your gloved fingers, grateful you'd been able to scrounge up a pair for the trip, though your poor, frozen nose hadn't been so lucky. You cupped your hands around your face and took a few open-mouthed breaths to generate some heat. It didn't quite do the trick, so you dropped your hands back down into your lap with a sigh. Of course, you could just run inside and get warmed up soon enough. But that would require energy, urgency, things you'd been in short supply of most of the year. So instead, you lingered. Took your time. Paid attention to the sensations of the world around you and not on exhausting thoughts like running.

Something was tickling your face. You ran a finger across your cheek and pulled it back to inspect the tiny flecks of snow now caught on your glove. You wanted to feel them fully so you gingerly took off both of your gloves, finger by finger, until the skin of your hands was exposed. Hands that looked nothing like your own. You knew they were yours, they moved like yours, they felt like yours, but they didn't look like yours. They were scarred and calloused, palms barely able to flatten out as you held them up in hopes of catching more snow. As predicted, your right one immediately started shaking, unable to hold the position without triggering its tremors. You quickly closed your fist and held it to your chest with your other hand. 

It's okay, it's okay. You squinted your eyes shut, trying to keep your breathing steady and not to let your mind wander in all the usual dark places. It's okay. Just breathe.

Just breathe...

Your own inner voice started to shift into the voice of another. A firm, steady voice you had been reaching out to in your memory more often these days.

Breathe. Hi, we found you, just breathe for me, okay?

You cracked your eyes open, half expecting to see his face just as you had in that closet. Panicking. Overwhelmed. Unable to catch your breath until he'd grasped your shoulders and coaxed you into calming down. When you'd opened your eyes and met his, so full of care and understanding, it hadn't mattered that half the party was crowded behind him, staring and whispering nervously. All you had been concerned with was following his gentle instructions, trusting that he'd lead you to safety.

Opening your eyes this time, you of course were met with the darkness of the night, broken up only by the tiny flakes of snow drifting in it. You were still clutching your hand to your chest, but that little well of anxiety that had threatened to rise up had been quelled. You were breathing just fine.

You were fine.

Alone, but fine.

A soft crunching of leaves grabbed your attention. You peered down the sidewalk and saw someone approaching. It could have been worrisome, a mysterious dark figure headed your way you at night. Except you could clearly see one of the limbs ended not in a hand, but a scomp link. There were very few people it could be, and only one given the context.

"Ah, I was hoping it was you! Saw some head-beams, thought I'd come out and see if anyone needed help."

"Hey, Echo." You hadn't known his name when he'd found you hiding in your friend's closet all those months ago, and now you knew him as a friend, too. Perhaps not as close as the ones you'd known since childhood, but he was a good one all the same.

You briefly considered jumping out of your seat and meeting him on the sidewalk, slipping an arm through his and guiding him back inside where it was likely so much warmer and merrier. That's what old you would have done. Before... well, before you became the present you. The one that struggled to think quickly enough to make decisions and just wanted to get through one day without feeling like dead weight.

Thankfully Echo didn't skip a beat. He walked right up to your speeder, opened the passenger door, and slid into the seat next to you.

"You alright?" he asked with a half-smile. But he didn't wait for an answer, knowing you hated the question. "It's been a while since I've seen you. You're looking a lot better."

You couldn't help but return a small smile of your own. You knew he wouldn't lie to you. It felt good to hear you didn't look like such a mess anymore.

"I'm feeling better," you responded.

"Oh?"

"Not great," you quickly caveated. "But better. Fine. I feel fine."

Echo nodded. "I'm really glad to hear that. And I'm really glad you're here. We weren't sure you'd make it."

You were pretty sure you knew what he meant but decided to take the opportunity to indulge in some dark humor.

"What? That I wouldn't come tonight? Or that I wouldn't be alive for another Life Day?"

Rather than smack you upside the head for such a comment, like all of your other friends surely would, Echo merely leveled a look back at you that made you smirk in amusement.

"You know very well I was referring to your annoying habit of canceling plans at the last minute. How many times now have you said you'd be home soon?"

You merely rolled your eyes, refraining from comment. You knew that he knew that you had your reasons for being away for so long. He was only teasing.

Echo reached over and set one of his hands on top of yours. "That said, you did worry me a few times. So yes, I'm really glad you're here. In both senses of the word."

His smile made you feel warm, and the way he was looking at you lit a small but happy fire within your chest. Perhaps that's why you didn't notice how cold your fingers had gotten in the night air without gloves. Though with his hand over your own, Echo could certainly tell.

"And on that note, let's get you inside. Everyone else will be excited to see you, too."

Echo scrambled out as you slowly got your own door open. You shoved your gloves into your coat before they could fall off of your lap as you stood.

"Here, let me," you could hear Echo calling as he hurried around to your side of the speeder. Ever the gentleman. Unfortunately, in his haste, his foot caught on something, maybe a branch or a crack in the pavement, and he went stumbling forward. You were already on both your feet and quickly reached out to help steady him, bracing your arms underneath his.

"Hey there, take it easy. Your body went through a lot this year, too," you smirked a bit as you both caught your breaths from the unexpected activity.

Echo chuckled. He was embarrassed, you could tell by the bright pink flush to his cheeks, but your comment seemed to lighten the mood. That, and the fact you were now standing very close together, still holding each other up. Echo blinked down at you, awkward and confused at first, and then relaxing as his gaze stayed in yours. That quiet stillness of the night you'd been thinking about earlier made its way back. Only now you weren't so alone in it.

Just when a sudden, pleasant thought entered your mind, that maybe he would kiss you, Echo cleared his throat and shifted back. He withdrew his scomp quickly while his good hand softly dragged along your arm as it fell away. A line of goosebumps surged in its wake, causing you to shiver, and unfortunately reminding Echo why he had rushed over here in the first place.

"Time to go inside," he nodded matter-of-factly. And you found you couldn't argue. It was getting pretty cold. So you fell into step beside him as you finally walked the final steps back home.

A wave of warmth and light and laughter hit you as the front door opened. Somewhere between the group hugs and the smell of baked goods, you'd forgotten why you'd been so anxious to come back here all those times. All of your loved ones were here, every single one. Seeing their faces, hearing their voices, was now filling a part of you you hadn't realized had been so empty for so long. The thought would have delighted you had you had the energy for such a strong emotion. So instead you settled for serenity. A calmer, quieter version of happiness. And though you weren't matching everyone else's liveliness, you still found yourself able to keep up with their conversations. You helped where you could, being mindful of your limits but never dwelling on them. And you even joined in on singing an impromptu carol.

Echo stayed close by you throughout the evening. You weren't sure what had happened, or almost happened, between you earlier, and you suspected he was still thinking about it too as you caught him gazing the same way at you several times. You'd be here for a few more nights, as would he, so you were sure there'd be other opportunities to figure things out. Tonight was for catching up and keeping warm and finally putting some of your deepest troubles to bed.

Oh it had been such a long, long year. You'd been tested in ways you never knew possible, each seemingly worse than the last. Your heart often sat heavy within you and several times you'd wondered if you could keep going.

And then... you did.

You pushed through one trial and into the next tribulation, again and again, and eventually you made your way here. To this very spot where you suddenly, finally, felt good. Your body had been through it, but you weren't broken beyond repair. You'd experienced far more than your fair share of grief, but you hadn't lost everything. You weren't thriving, but you also weren't hanging by a thread. You had hope. For the first time in a long time, you were allowing yourself to look ahead.

And toward the end of the night, when you'd all gathered around the fireplace and were holding mugs aloft in a toast to the season, you had your chance to declare your intentions for the future.

"Happy Life Day!" everyone cheered together.

"Happy Life Day," Echo whispered next to you.

You smiled up at him and clinked your mug against his.

"And here's to many more."

Song Inspo: Merry Christmas, Here's to Many More - Relient K

Please go check out the @cloneficgiftexchange blog for all the other contributions to this great event! Fics are being posted all throughout today (12/14/24). Spread the love for fandom writers/creators by reblogging!

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[lotusconstellation]

Well, I had an idea for you to do...

The reader is a streamer who enters the Welcome website and, together with the live people, gets to know this Welcome and Yandere! Wally.

Well, how would Wally react to that? And as time goes by wally falls in love with the reader, how would he see the reader's fans and his job of doing live, playing games, watching videos?

-🐰

{Sorry this took so long! But I ended up getting to caught up in the request and ended up having to make a pt. 2, I do apologize though, I hope you don’t mind. As always, I hope you enjoy! And thank you for the request!}

(Art, Wally and Welcome Home all rightfully belongs to @partycoffin)

“Nostalgia” Pt. 1

Pairing: Yandere Wally Darling x Streamer! GN!Reader

Tw: Yandere behavior, cussing

Summary: You decide to take a trip down memory lane with your Viewers. Unaware of the consequences.

Y/N was a daily streamer under the name of {Streamer name}.

Y/N wasn't very big or popular, maybe with a few frequent watchers here and there that would greet them in real life and ask for a quick picture, but that’s all Y/N could ask for really.

They didn’t need to have a big platform or have a lot of money. They just wanted to stream for fun, just something they could do in their free time when they had nothing else to do.

Y/N didn’t really have a main style of content to put out. Sometimes it’ll be them reacting/watching something a viewer recommends, playing a video game, or even just making a relaxing space for anyone who needs it— playing soft music in the background while answering to any comments.

One day, Y/N was hit with an unexpected wave of nostalgia. They had started remembering fond memories from childhood. From the happy ones to the embarrassing ones— down to the old shows they used to watch as a kid. The sudden wave gave them an idea. Once they would get home from work, Y/N would take their viewers down memory lane and react to old shows and/or movies from the early 2000’s.

“That theme song had no reason being that good, I’m telling you,” Y/N said, taking a sip of their drink while reading the chat.

=======

NeonLeon: No fr

Anxpsyche: The Little Einsteins theme song from season 2 is the best, I know they just added clapping but it made it sm better

WhimsicalWanderbitch: I remember I used to watch Little Einsteins and The Backyardigans all the time when I was kid with my brother

Passionfruit69: Pls play the wonder pets theme song

WhimsicalWanderbitch: me and him always sang along to the songs

Theanklebreaker: I loved wonder pets, omg

JumpInTheMacaque: Does anyone remember Sharkboy and Lavagirl?!

Kirbolissous: OH MY GOD I REMEMBER I USED TO LOVE THE SHIT OUT OF YO GABA GABA THAT SHOW WAS MY SHIT

Escapeben: Do you remember Oswald?

Scouts_Kubs: all I remember watching is little bill and how the teletubbies scared tf out of me

Springday23:SAME!

lychee_jelly_tea:I REMEMBER SHARKBOY AND LAVAGIRL

=======

As Y/N was talking with the chat, they had let out a gasp. “Aweee, oh my god, I just remembered this really old show I used to watch,” The Streamer cooed, flashbacks flooding their mind of them watching said show for hours on end. Recalling all the soft yet bright and vibrant colors of the show, and all the lovable characters.

Y/N waited a moment for the chat to respond. Seeing most of them asking for the name of the show, while a few others carried on with their own conversations. “It wasn’t an early 2000’s show, it was like…” The streamer’s words trailed off, trying to remember when the show was made. “Ah fuck, when was the show made? It was made in the…70’s..? I wanna say, oh my god, Wait, what was it called? God damn it,” Y/N leaned back on their chair, with their hands over their face, as they tried to remember the name of the show. Meanwhile the chat was listing off shows from the 70’s to try and jog their memory.

========

lychee_jelly_tea: Lupin the third pt. 2?

JumpInTheMacaque: The Addams Family?

Theanklebreaker: Uh…New Fantastic four?

Kirbolissous: Was it The New Adventures of Batman?

NeonLeon: Scooby doo?

======

“Oh my god it was called Welcome Home!,” Y/N shouted, jumping up from their previous position.

“That one show that looks like it was inspired by Sesame Street? Oh my god wait-“ Y/N went to Google and searched up, “Welcome Home Characters” the results popped up right immediately. “These bitches!” The streamer circled their cursor around a big JPG image of all the ‘Welcome Home’ characters.

“I remember that whenever I would have to be babysat by my grandparents, all they had was this old Combo television unit and a bunch of old VHS tapes. So all I had to watch was whatever VHS tapes they had and Welcome Home was one of them,” Y/N explained, unintentionally looking further down the rabbit hole of the show, reminiscing in all its glory. By now, Y/N was grinning from ear to ear.

“Oh my god, this is gonna be embarrassing but I remember Wally, the main character- er the one with the blue hair, low-key used to creep me out,” Y/N laughed, feeling embarrassed how a puppet with a blue pompadour used to creep them out.

“Like, I wasn’t scared of him but the way he laughed and the way he would just stare at people for an uncomfortable amount of time in the show is what creeped me out,” Y/N had elaborated after noticing the chat was clowning them for being scared of a puppet.

====

Anxpsyche: Bro, you were scared of him? He looks gay as shit

lychee_jelly_tea: I ACTUALLY REMEMBER WATCHING THAT SHOW AND HAVING A HUGE CRUSH ON WALLY!

JumpInTheMacaque: @Lychee_jelly_tea had me watch that show when we were younger and I low-key loved it

NeonLeon: You were really scared of a puppet? This puppet out of all of them?

JumpInTheMacaque: They actually have a website for that show now

Theanklebreaker: I would be scared of the chicken that looks like Big bird

Passionfruit69: I’d be scared of the gray one that’s looking at the butterfly

=========

“Okay- Later on I wasn’t scared of him. He grew on me, I’m just saying when I first watched him I thought he was a little off!” Y/N defended, it took awhile for them to notice a specific comment. “Wait, JumpInTheMacaque, you said they have a website?” Y/N leaned forward, scrolling back up to where JumpInTheMacaque made that comment before scrolling back down.

======

JumpInTheMacaque: Yea, but you can’t really do much with it rn, you can only see the neighborhood from a Birds Eye view and see the Info about the characters

====

“I still wanna see it, give me a sec,” The streamer went to The search bar before pausing. “Is it just called ‘Welcome Home website’ Or…”

“Oh! I found it!” Y/N exclaimed, clicking on the website without hesitating The website opened up and a picture faded in with the title in big pastel letters on the left center of the picture and Wally sitting on a painted rock with colorful flowers, trees, and home all right behind him. Wally stared at you with his round eyes and had an opened mouth smile. Y/N oooh’ed in awe, fascinated by the way the site opened up. “Oh my gosh, this is so cool,” Y/N tried to contain their excitement, but the shake in their voice and the huge smile on their face was a dead give away. They apologized when they realized their failed attempt. “Sorry guys, I’m just so excited right now.”

"With a hop, skip, and a jump, you are ushered into the colorful, serendipitous world of Welcome Home! It only takes one stroll down the neighborhood to know this is just the nicest little place you’ve ever seen! Watch Wally and his colorful array of friendly neighbors learn about the vibrant world around them and take part in nonsensical fun!"

“Oh Jesus Christ, alright, let’s get started- There’s a guestbook?!…YOU CAN WRITE IN IT?! Wait- I wanna look at everything else first before I do the guestbook.“

The rest of the stream was filled with Y/N clicking around in the neighborhood and reading the info about the characters, expressing memories and giving info about some moments they remember from certain episodes. Y/N was about to click out of the neighborhood and take a look at the guest book. However, they caught a glimpse of something that seemed…out of place. “What the hell is that?” Y/N questioned, pointing to the small black spot under Home with their cursor. “What the hell is that?” The streamer leaned closer to their screen, squinting their eyes to try to get a better look. Right away, they tried to see if they could move Home out of the way, but it didn’t work. Whenever they clicked on Home it either opened up to Wally’s info or it didn’t move. “What…what do I do? That’s not just me right, you guys can see that?” Y/N was at a loss, what do they do?

====

Kirbolissous: What the hell?

lychee_jelly_tea: I’ve never noticed that before! What is that?!

Anxpsyche: what in the actual hell is that?

NeonLeon: Why is there just a black hole under Wally’s house?

JumpInTheMacaque: Try inspecting it, find Home’s code, delete it, then get out of inspect

=====

“Okay, hold on,” Y/N followed the instructions the best they could, they wouldn’t really skilled in this type of stuff, so they struggled a bit, though they figured it out pretty quickly. “Okay…” They mumbled, now seeing a huge black hole in the place Home was. Y/N was confused and clicked on the hole. The computer suddenly opened up a new browser and it seemed to be taking awhile to load. However, Y/N said nothing, sitting in silence as the air slowly started to grow thick, and their palms started to sweat.

Y/N’s eyes grew wide once the image finally loaded. The whole screen was black other than a red outline of Wally on his knees, reaching up to a window and Home’s eyes staring back at him. Y/N stared at the image for what seemed like hours. They just sat there, inspecting the image in horror, but mainly in bewilderment.

What was this?

Why was Wally on the ground?

What was going on?

Why was this on the website? Was it supposed to be?

Slowly, Y/N clicked off the browser. The computer immediately took them back to the Welcome Home website. Y/N scratched their nose and clicked out of the neighborhood, going to the guestbook. “Okay, I don’t know what that was but let’s-…” The Streamer put in the name they go by online. “Let’s just do the Guestbook then I’m calling it a day,” Y/N tried not to let people see how spooked they were, but again, their now quiet and soft tone, gave it all away.

Y/N wrote in the guestbook.

“Looked around the neighborhood with all my viewers, everything was so bright and colorful! Really loved it!”

With that, Y/N bid their signature goodbye to everyone before stopping the stream and turning everything off, but Y/N didn’t move just yet. Their mind was still stuck on the image of Wally.

Was that supposed to be on the website? Why would it be? Are they just trying to add a twist to the franchise now? But why would they, it was fine the way it was. Yes, it got canceled, but that’s only because it became outdated. Was this a sign for something big?

Gah, Y/N shouldn’t be worrying about this. People are allowed to add things to a franchise as long as it stays true to the characters (to a certain extent) and stays respectful to the creators boundaries, and Wally was a bit of an odd one. Maybe they’re just now going more in depth with his character since now it’s a new time with new interest, and they have to get people’s attention somehow, right?

Whatever the reason, it was getting late, and Y/N had to get up for work tomorrow. With that, they finally got up from their uncomfortable chair they use for every stream and stretched. Satisfied when they heard some joints pop and crack. Y/N let out a yawn, realizing how tired they were before walking off to their bathroom to brush their teeth..

𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪 𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪 𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪

…Through the static of the TV, you can hear Wally’s muffled voice boom through the tiny speakers.

"That concludes our time together for today, my dear neighbors. But rest assured, tomorrow is another day, and I'll be watching over you just as diligently. Goodbye, neighbor. Ha ha ha.”

*Click*

The End! I hope you enjoyed and keep on the lookout for pt.2!

That is all for today, I hope you are having a good Day/Night/Afternoon and I will see you all in my next writing, au revoir!! 💜💜💛💛

[kkyaka]

Chapter 1: In Limbo

Limbo: Any in-between place, state or condition of neglect or oblivion which results in an unresolved status, delay, or deadlock

Summary: Meeting Aomine after seven years in the store and finding out he has a kid was definitely not what you were expecting when you were out shopping. But the last thing you expected was becoming a babysitter turned nanny looking after his kid. Word Count: 11, 483 Warnings: awkward encounters, lots of angst in this chapter, reader thinks aomine cheated on her aomine doesn't have a great relationship with his son, aomine is still way into you, reader plays beach volleyball, reader is a part time babysitter, painful trips down memory lane, reader chews aomine the fuck out, if there's anything else I missed please lmk lol A/N: Hope you enjoy this! I had a bunch of fun writing it, and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

MASTERLIST

You check off the last snack that you have on your grocery list, seeing that the next thing on the list is a couple of aisles down. You're about to move but you jump when you feel something tap at your back. You look over your shoulder, having to look down to see a kid standing behind you. He doesn't look happy, and it looks like he's on the verge of tears.

"Are you okay?" you ask, fully turning around and crouching down.

"I can't find my dad," he says quietly, and you carefully put your hand on his shoulder.

"Okay, okay. Don't worry. I'll help you," you reassure, and he takes a deep breath. "I'm pretty sure he's looking for you, so why don't we wait here to see if he comes down this aisle?" He nods and you look back and forth at either end of the aisle to see if you see a man that looks like he's looking for someone. "What's your name?" you ask, looking back at the kid.

"Taj."

"Nice to meet you, Taj," you say, introducing yourself after you respond. Since it's so early in the morning, there aren't a lot of people in the store, so you're hoping that'll make resolving this situation a lot easier. "How old are you?"

"Seven," he says, looking over the stuff that you have in your cart.

"Do you remember where you last saw your dad?" He shakes his head after he shrugs causing you to sigh a little. "Do you remember if it smelled like anything?" you try, hoping that he knows something that might help. He shakes his head again, and you don't try to ask him another question because you don't want to overwhelm him.

"It was cold," he says after the both of you are silent for a bit.

"Okay! That's good!" you respond. "What was he doing before you lost him?"

"He was on the phone, and I wanted some juice, but he wasn't listening to me. So, I wanted to try and find it myself." His lips wobble a little, and you're quick to console him.

"Hey, hey, it's okay. Let's see if he's still over there, alright?" He sniffs, nodding shortly after. "You wanna push the basket?" you try, and you smile when one pulls at the corner of his mouth. You move letting him put his hands on the handle before you put yours on the outside of his. You walk carefully to make sure that you don't step on his feet.

You guide him towards the frozen aisles even though you're pretty sure you're doing most of the pushing. You have him look down the aisles to see if he sees his father, but to your dismay, he doesn't see him. "How about we go get that juice you wanted?" you ask, rubbing over his head to get his attention. "Then we can go to the front and get some more help."

He's silent again as he nods, and you hope that it keeps him from freaking out just a little bit longer until you can find his dad. You go down the juice aisle, letting him pick out which one he wants. He instantly knows which one to get, and you let him hold onto it as you head toward the register.

You go through the self-checkout, buying him the juice before you walk over to where all the carts are kept at the front of the store. You're glad that you barely started shopping, so there isn't a lot in your cart; just the snacks you picked up right before Taj approached you.

"Hey, bud, it's gonna be okay," you tell him, crouching down again when it looks like he might cry. "I promise we'll find your dad." You look up, looking for a worker to alert about the situation.

"Taj, oh thank God!" you hear, and his face lights up in recognition as he runs out of your reach. You quickly stand, turning around to see Taj being held by his dad as he hugs him tightly.

"Thank--" You freeze when you finally see who Taj's father is, and he does the same, his words getting caught in his throat at the sight of you. He says your name in what sounds like disbelief, and you give him an awkward smile.

"Aomine," you respond, not knowing what to say. He's still holding Taj, and it's like he doesn't know what to say either, the air starting to feel stifling as it takes an uncomfortable turn.

"Um, thanks for staying with him," he eventually says, and you shake your head as you wave him off.

"It was no problem. I'm just glad you're reunited." You try to swiftly end the conversation so that you can get back to shopping and get out of here. You're about to leave when Aomine suddenly looks down at his son's hands.

"Where'd you get this from?" he asks, softly taking the juice from him, too wound up in the fact that he found him to see what he was holding.

"She bought it for me!" Taj answers cheerfully, and Aomine looks at you right as you start to move away.

You huff a little. "He said he wanted some juice, so I just got a little bottle," you try, wondering if he'll be mad at you for doing so.

"Let me pay you back," he says, which surprises you, and your eyes widen when he sticks his hand in his pocket.

"No, no! It's okay, it's just juice," you chuckle, trying to ease the tension out of your shoulders, and you put your hands on the basket, hopefully signaling the end of this conversation. "I'm just glad to he's with you," you repeat and before you can take a step, Taj is wiggling out of Aomine's arms and making his way toward you.

"Thank you for the juice! And for staying with me!" he beams, and you smile down at him as you rub over his head, hugging him back when he hugs you.

"Of course, Taj. Just tell your dad where you're going next time, okay?" He nods quickly, and you laugh softly before you try to make your escape again, but it seems like fate doesn't want that just yet.

"So, how have you been?" Or rather, it's him that doesn't want that just yet. You turn around to see that Aomine's standing closer to you than before, Taj standing next to him.

"Pretty good I would say," you say, almost sounding like you're forcing it out until you compose yourself. "Just taking it day by day. How about you? I bet you're having the time of your life," you continue, talking about the fact that he's very popular in the professional basketball setting.

"You could say that," he says with a half-laugh, and it now dawns on you that he has a kid. And he's seven. The last time you saw Aomine was a little over seven years ago, and that was when you finally called it quits. You don't want to jump to conclusions, but you can't help but think if he was seeing someone else while you were together.

The thought leaves a sour taste in your mouth, and you decide to get out of this conversation. "I really have to go, I've got to meet with some friends," you say, not even fumbling over your words as you lie. "It was good to see you," you slowly finish because it actually wasn't, but you're pretty sure that's what you're supposed to say. Right?

Taj tells you goodbye, giving you a wave that you return with a smile before you walk off with your cart, not daring to look back. You could just walk out and forget shopping altogether, but there's nothing in your house, so you needed this shopping trip. You move as fast as you can, hoping that you don't have to run into him anymore.

You ended up getting a lot more groceries than you thought, but you're in and out of the store without running into Aomine again. You make it to your car and start moving the bags into your car. You have big reusable bags that you put multiple groceries in, but that means that they're more on the heavier side.

You hear your name being called, and you turn around to see Taj running toward you with Aomine right behind him. Your heart sinks a bit at the sight of Aomine, sighing internally but putting on a smile when Taj gets to you. He holds his hand up, and you see that he has a flower in his hand. You gasp softly, taking it as you have a hard time fighting your smile.

"What's this for?" you laugh, lowering yourself to his level, and he steps closer to give you a hug.

"I wanted to thank you for staying with me and helping me find my dad," he tells you when he pulls away.

"Thank you, Taj. You didn't have to do that," you say before holding the flower up to your nose to smell it. "But this happens to be my favorite." You rub his head again, standing up fully, and Aomine's moving toward you.

"Let me help you with your bags," he offers, and you don't get a chance to deny it because he's moving before you can speak. He moves them quickly without any trouble, but then Taj wants to help also, which slows Aomine down a bit. You just stand there, wondering how your morning got sidetracked so quickly.

When they're done filling your car, Taj wants to run the cart back to the cart corral, and Aomine lets him since it's in his eyesight. He warns him to watch out for cars, and you both smile as you watch him carefully push it over there. You keep your attention on Taj in hopes that his dad won't start another awkward conversation.

"I don't know how I can thank you." You sigh again, pointedly turning your head.

"Don't worry about it. But maybe just keep an eye on him next time?" you try with a soft chuckle.

"I was on the phone, and I just got caught up."

"You don't have to explain anything to me. I mean, it's not like we really know each other," you add, kicking at imaginary rocks on the ground when you look down at your feet, so you miss the way Aomine's body sags at your words.

Taj comes running back, and Aomine hides his face with a smile as he gives his son a high-five. "Well, I really should get going. Thanks for helping me out," you say, looking down at Taj. Aomine seems to get the hint this time because he nods before beginning to step away from your car when you walk to the door.

"It was really good seeing you," he admits, but all you can respond with is a nod and a tight smile. You give one last wave to Taj before getting in the car, and you can see the two of them turn around and walk to their car in your rearview mirror. Aomine straps Taj in the backseat, and you can see him look at your car one last time before he gets in his. You grab the steering wheel before letting your head fall on top of it, releasing a loud groan that you couldn't before.

You start the car and make a point to not think about the last hour of your life as you drive home. You rationalize the whole thing by coming to the conclusion that you'll never see him again. At least in person, and speaking of that, how did you not know he had a kid? You hadn't been following Aomine's NBA journey because you didn't want to look at anything that reminded you of him after you graduated high school.

You feel like you might've heard about a kid if you think about it, but for some reason, you just never put it together that he belonged to Aomine. But now that you've seen him, there's no mistaking that he's Aomine's kid. He's basically a photocopy of him, even down to the same color hair. You're sitting at a red light when you realize that you're now thinking about someone that you said you weren't going to think about.

But you know you won't be able to get over it until you analyze every new piece of information you found out today. Taj is seven? The question just makes you go back to those bad thoughts. He's definitely not your kid, and you don't know his birthday so you can't match it up to when you and Aomine broke up.

A car honking snaps you out of your thoughts, and you drive through the light, already thinking of ways to get your mind off of this. The rest of your drive home goes by in a blur once you fully immerse in the music you have playing in your car. You get to your apartment, sighing as you mentally prepare yourself to carry all of your groceries to your door.

Even though you're on the verge of sweating and desperately want to sit down, you put your frozen and refrigerated groceries up before you sit down on the couch. You sit in silence for a while as you wait for your heartbeat to settle down, letting your head fall back so that you can look at the ceiling.

You let your hand fall over your eyes, laughing a little as you think about everything that happened this morning. And then you shake your head when you realize that you don't look your best today, but then you cut yourself some slack because it's early in the morning on a weekday. There was no reason for you to go all out for a grocery trip.

But seeing Aomine of all people? Do you really want to take that trip down memory lane? Something that you've been trying to get over ever since it happened? You quickly decide that you don't want to; it's too early in the morning for you to get your mood ruined.

You get up once you're not close to sweating and your heart has calmed down. You start to put away the rest of your groceries, and you're grabbing the last of the stuff when a receipt floats to the floor. You frown because you swore the cashier gave it to you, and you put it in your back pocket. You put your chips away, closing the cabinet before picking up the receipt.

You see that there's only one item that's been bought, and you look further down to see a phone number. You scoff when you recognize the number, rolling your eyes when they read the message of wondering if you'd like to catch up. You ball up the paper before throwing it away. You're not going through that again, and there is no reason for you to be in contact with Aomine anymore.

It's been about a month since that run-in with Aomine, and you hate how you're constantly on edge whenever you go to the store. Whenever you get to the car when you're done, your shoulders hurt when you relax from how tense you've been. For the first two weeks, it was like you were waiting to just run into him again. Then after that, you sort of snapped yourself out of it. The chances of you seeing Aomine again were very slim, so after a while, you finally started to relax. You had absolutely no reason to be anxious.

The weather is starting to cool down a bit thank goodness, so you're allowed to do a bit more with the kids you're babysitting. You've been babysitting for a few years now, trying to find something to make ends meet when you're not working. You weren't always working seasonally, but it paid a little more and you got more freedom, so you took the opportunity.

You've grown your clientele over the years due to babysitting for friends, and then they would tell their friends, and so on. The kids you're babysitting now you've been watching since they were babies. Their mom is one of your best friends, and you always help her out when she and her husband's jobs have them staying somewhere out of the city.  

You're at the park with them today since it's a lot cooler than it has been since September is right around the corner. You're sitting on one of the benches, reading a book that you've been meaning to finish while you keep an eye and ear on the kids. You look up when you finish the chapter to make sure you can still see them before you look down to start the next one.

"Hi, y/n!" You frown as you raise your head because the voice doesn't sound like your kids but it does sound familiar.

"Taj?" you question with an eyebrow raised. "What are you doing here?"

"My dad brought me," he answers, and you look up in time to see Aomine walking up to you. So much for your chances of seeing him again being slim to none.

"Funny seeing you here," he jests, and you give him a tight-lipped smile.

"Yeah," you mumble.

"Are your kids playing here, too?" Taj asks, and your smile is genuine as you shake your head.

"No, they're my friend's kids. I'm babysitting," you explain. "You wanna meet them? They're around your age." Taj doesn't really give you an answer, looking a little on the hesitant side, but you don't get a chance to continue because the kids come up to you.

"Do you have any snacks, Auntie?" Kayla asks, and you know her brother is going to ask the same thing.

"Yeah, but I want you to guys to meet someone first," you start. "This is Taj, and he's around you guys' age."

"I'm Tyson," your nephew says. "How old are you?"

"Seven," he answers quietly.

"So am I! I'm Kayla!" she shouts. "And I like your hair!" she compliments, and you laugh a bit. "You can play with us if you want."

"Okay," Taj whispers, nodding his head. You hand them some snacks after getting them some hand sanitizer. You offer some to Taj as well, and they snack a little before they go back to the playground. Aomine's still standing when they leave, and the air suddenly turns awkward like it did at the store.

"You mind?" he asks, gesturing toward the bench. You shake your head as you scooch over a bit, and Aomine sighs as he takes a seat next to you. "So, you're babysitting now?"

"Yeah, kinda," you say, nodding your head a little. "I work a seasonal job remotely, so I babysit for a little extra money."

"How long you been doing that for?"

"A while," you chuckle. "I started right before senior year of college, but the amount of kids that I babysit now has really grown since then." He nods after you're done, and you don't know what to ask him because you already know what he's been up to. But then that one thing that's been bugging you in the back of your mind comes up.

"You know," you begin, "Taj is seven."

"Right," Aomine responds slowly.

"And we...broke up a little over seven years ago." You look away at the kids playing, and you hear Aomine sigh.

"Yeah?" he voices, and you know he's probably wondering where you're going with this.

You take a deep breath before you get the courage to look at him, and you jump internally when you see that he's staring right at you. "Did you--" You don't even know if you can get it out. "Did you cheat on me?"

If someone saw the look on his face, they probably would've thought you insulted him to the highest degree. "Of course not. I would never." He sounds offended, a little hurt, and you hate to say that you're relieved he sounds that way. "I swear I didn't cheat on you, but it's complicated with Taj's mom."

You nod in lieu of speaking, still getting over how eased you feel knowing that he didn't cheat on you. It's been bothering you since you found out about Taj, and it would've just put more salt in the wound if he said yes.

"Are you seeing anyone?" he asks after the both of you are silent for a while.

"Nah," you huff, shaking your head. "Been kinda on the busy side lately." You're not looking at him as you answer, but you hear him hum, and you can see him stuff his hands in his jacket pockets. "Are you seeing anyone?" You don't really care, but you feel like you have to or you should ask.

"No." He answers the same way you do with a huff and a shake of his head. "Haven't seen anyone in years." You nod quietly, hiding your surprise as best as you can. That's honestly a shock to you, but he could just be referring to dating and not how many people he's slept with.

Silence falls between you again, and you relax against the back of the bench, feeling your shoulders hurting from how tense you are. How are you supposed to sit here and act like everything is fine when he broke your heart seven years ago? You want to say that you're over it, but fuck, did it hurt. You don't know if you can sit here and act like what happened between the two of you didn't happen.

"You, uh," he starts, picking at some loose lint on his pants, "you never texted."

"I don't have your number," you lie, kicking at the ground a little.

"You didn't see it on the receipt?"

"I don't think I did," you claim, slowly shaking your head. When you look at him, he has this look on his face, but you don't keep eye contact for too long for fear that he'll see right through you.

"Well, we should probably exchange numbers," he continues, "you know, for the kids."

You look at said kids. Is he seriously using them to get your number?

"Sure," you sigh, figuring that if you do give him your number, it doesn't mean that he'll be texting you all of the time. You take your phone out of your pocket, unlocking it before handing it to him. "You didn't text yourself?" you ask when he gives you back your phone.

He shakes his head. "No, I still have your number saved."

"After all this time?" you joke, but you're mostly laughing to hide your disbelief.

"Of course." You look forward instead of looking at him, turning your attention to the kids playing. You hate how a part of you finds it endearing that he still has your number saved. The other part of you however is confused as to why he still would. Towards the end of your relationship, he didn't make it known that he cared about you that much. You briefly wonder if he even had your name still saved by the time you called it off.

You internally shake your head. It doesn't matter anymore, that was all in the past. You can maintain a civil relationship with him even though you don't really want to. What you want to do is scream at him and ask him why he spent so much time chasing you back then just to break your heart in two. It took your friends to convince you that everything that went down back then wasn't your fault.

You felt like it was though because you didn't want to mess with him in the first place, but you did it anyway. You met in your last year of high school when he transferred, and you knew the basketball coach, so he asked you to show him around to make sure he doesn't get lost. He already had everybody's attention because he was the new kid, but you didn't want to give him any more attention. There was no reason to.

But the fact that you didn't really care about him seemed to only make him more interested in you. You had a couple of classes together, so he used that to mess with you every chance he had. Along with that, you were the manager for the girls' basketball team, which meant you were seeing him even more. Whenever there was an away game, you were stuck on the bus with both teams, and Aomine always found a seat near you.

The coaches were strict about boys and girls not sharing seats, but he didn't let that stop him. He was always looking for you whenever he was playing, and he'd always do it whenever he scored, knowing that you'd be looking. You always told him how much he annoyed you, but it never seemed like he cared. If you were on the bus after an away game, you would always sit in the back, trying to get some of your homework done.

Aomine would be sitting in the seat across from you, watching you until you finally said something. He would use these bus rides back to be a little bit bolder in his advances. A lot of people would go home with their parents after the games, but you and Aomine, most of the time, weren't in that category.

After one game, you finally gave in, letting him kiss you on the way home. You knew how attractive he was, and you'd be crazy not to be into him, but you held out for so long.

But you still wouldn't let your guard down. It took him weeks after that, and multiple sneaky kisses to convince you that he was really into you. Even after the season was over, he was promising to take you out, showing you how serious he was. You didn't tell anyone when you finally made your relationship official, but people basically already knew. Since it was your last year in high school, you both, of course, had the college talk.

Neither of you wanted the other to sacrifice their future for the other, so you ended up going to different schools, but they were close to each other. At first, it was great; you and Aomine were talking all of the time and seeing each other during your breaks. But then he started to get more distant. You knew that he was busy with practice since he was being scouted for the NBA, but he would go days without contacting you.

When you finally got around to seeing him in person, he wasn't the same Aomine that you knew. He was paying more attention to his friends, practically leaving you out of everything. You couldn't handle it anymore, and when you finally blew up, he looked at you with the most bored look on his face. It was then you realized that you wasted almost a year of your life with him.

When you walked out, he tried to call for you, but you ignored him. You went home, not even bothering with crying because you had done that on the way home. He tried to call you and text, but you ignored every single one until they stopped. You never saw him again and you didn't want to. You briefly heard his name filtering through sports news, but that was it. You finally healed and moved on from him, having a couple of partners since then, but it never really led toward anything.

The one thing you didn't like was that it felt like something was missing with them, but you could never figure it out. The last thing you expected to happen was to run into him and reunite him with his kid. Life sure has a way of throwing the most random things at you when you least expect it.

"So, you come here often?" Aomine's voice snaps you out of your daydream, and you look at him with an amused yet confused smile.

"To the park?" you question.

"Uh, yeah," he starts, taking one of his hands out of his pockets. "Like, with the kids I mean. How often are you here?" he finishes, waving his hand before he rubs at the back of his neck.

"It depends on where their parents are," you answer. "If their parents are out of town and the weather's nice, then they usually like to spend their time here." You watch him nod at your answer. "But they'll be home for a while, so I probably won't be here as much," you add. It's definitely not a lie, but you hope that by you telling him this, he'll tone it down a bit. You have no desire to try and build a whatever with him again. That ship has sailed.

You know what he's doing, and it's like it's high school all over again. He's got another thing coming if he thinks that you'll just let him back in again. It's gonna take a lot more than coincidental meet-ups.

"I saw you on TV one time," he starts after the silence becomes some awkward, you nearly can't stand it. "You're amazing at volleyball."

"Thanks," you say softly, curling your lips into your mouth to try and hide your smile. "My friend needed a sand partner in college, and I've been playing ever since."

"So, you have any tournaments coming up?" he asks, and you can't help but look at him, wondering what in the hell is going through his head.

"Not for a while. Once it gets warmer, they'll start back up, so that means I gotta start training now," you laugh softly, mentally preparing yourself for the tough workout you're going to have to start soon. "I usually workout anyway, but I'm gonna have to do a little more if I wanna be in good shape."

He nods, and you take his silence as the end of the conversation. You look back the kids playing, checking the time on your phone. They just got here, so there's no way you're going to be out of this situation any time soon. "You taking anymore clients?" The question makes you freeze for a split second as your heart drops a bit. He can't be asking you what you think he's asking.

"You need a babysitter?" you tease even though no part of you finds this funny.

"Well, Taj seems to really like you, and the season's about to start, so I won't have much time to watch him," he says.

Your mind is racing with thoughts as you think about whether or not to consider. The money would be nice, but seeing Aomine for who knows how long isn't something that you want to do. But Taj seems like a really sweet kid, so you hope in the end, it'll all be worth it, and Aomine will be out of your hair before you even realize it.

"When do you want me to start?"

His eyes cut towards you. "Seriously?" You just give him a look, and he clears his throat. "As soon as possible for you? I've got about a month left before everything is gonna get hectic, so--" He trails off and you nod.

"I can send you all the details and let you know when I'm available."

"Cool," he replies quietly. "Thanks."

"Sure." You internally release a heavy sigh. It feels like time has slowed down immensely. Thankfully, he doesn't try to make anymore conversation, and since you have nothing else to do, you start to get everything ready. You've had to start getting pretty thorough with the paperwork, so you go ahead and try to get a jump on it.

The kids play until they get tired, and you're more than ready to get out of here. The kids had fun playing, and you tell Taj that he can always hang out with them again, and you let Aomine know that you'll be sending him the information within the next week. You follow your niece and nephew to the car, silent as you think about how you ended in this situation. Past you would be screaming right now.

You decide to push it away, focusing all your energy on your plans for the rest of the day. You'll save the sulking for later.

~

"Are you fucking with me right now?"

"You think I would joke about something like this?" you sigh, putting your elbows on your knees before putting your face in your hands. When you dropped off the kids, your friend could tell something was wrong, and it didn't take her long for her to get it out of you.

You're currently on the couch, telling her the events that happened today. You didn't tell her about running into him at the store, figuring that seeing Aomine was just a one-time thing, but his presence at the park today told you that wasn't going to be the case.

"And now you're gonna be babysitting his kid?" she asks, and you rub your fingers over your eyes, a smiling forming on your face against your will. You feel like you have to laugh hearing it out loud. "He didn't cheat on you, did he?"

She was one of the people that was your support system after you broke up with Aomine. It broke you to the point where you almost didn't go to class. She was the reason why you were able to pick to be yourself back up again. To say you fully recovered wouldn't really be the truth, but it was enough to where you could go long periods of time without thinking about him.

You're quick to shake your head. "No, he said he didn't. He actually looked distraught that I even asked him that."

She sighs as she lays back against the couch, and you copy her, letting your body fully relax as your hands make their way over your eyes. "Well, this is not what was on my bingo card for you this year."

"You're telling me!" you exclaim softly. "God, what did I even do for this to happen?" you ask out loud to yourself. "His kid is cute though. Looks just like him," you continue. "And hopefully, when all of this starts, I'll be seeing Aomine for as little as possible."

"So, you're actually going through with it?" she questions.

"Why not?" you shrug. "I kinda don't have anything to lose, and I'm making money."

"Well, if you need to me to beat him, I'll be there in an instant." You both laugh, and she pulls you into a hug.

"Thank you," you whisper into her hair. You didn't realize how much you needed to talk to her. Ever since Aomine came back into your life, you've been so tense, only realizing it when you hugged her.

"Of course."

You're currently driving to Aomine's house, blasting the music from the speakers to try and drown out the unpleasant thoughts. You can't believe a month has already passed so fast, and babysitting is the last thing you're worried about. You can't help but admire the mansions you pass as you start to get closer to his house, and you already knew that he was obviously loaded, but it doesn't really hit you until you're pulling into the driveway.

Aomine's already opening the door when you walk up the driveway as you lock your car, and you give him a friendly, closed-lipped smile as he steps to the side to let you in. You look around as you hear him close the door, and you take a deep breath. You turn around to face him, and you hate how your heart still skips a beat when you look at him. You will the younger part of yourself to stay at bay and remain professional.

"So, welcome to my home," he says awkwardly, putting his hands in his pockets, and you can't help but chuckle, hoping that it'll diffuse the stifling tension. "Lemme show you around," he says quickly after, and you follow him as he takes you through the house. "Obviously, this is the living room and the kitchen," he points out with a soft wave of his hand. "Feel free to help yourself whenever you're here by the way," he adds before continuing the tour.

He takes you down a hallway, and he shows you the laundry room before opening another door. "I know you said you work remotely, so if you're here while you're working, you can use this space for an office," he offers.

"Thanks," you say quietly, taking a look around the room. He takes you down another hallway, and you don't fight the excitement you feel when you see how big the gym he has is.

"You can use whatever, I'm not gonna be using this as much once everything starts," he tells you. "I know you said you needed to start training, so have at it." You're relieved to say the least. You never really like going to the gym, and the one at your apartment pales in comparison with his.

He shows you the backyard, which looks exactly like you thought it would with a big patio, pool, and everything. He takes you upstairs next, gesturing to one of the closed doors, telling you it's his room. There are a couple more bedrooms and guest bathrooms, and he shows you an open space next which you assume he uses for entertaining along with a playroom for Taj, seeing some toys scattered about.

Once that's done, you stop when he stops at a door, knocking on it before softly pushing it open. "Guess who's here," he says, and Taj looks up from his drawings, and you smile when his face lights up. He's quick to get up and run over to you, and you hug him tightly when he gets to you.

"What are you doing here?" he asks, barely pulling away from you.

"I'm gonna be your babysitter since basketball season is about to start," you tell him.

"Really?" You laugh as you nod.

"I'm gonna talk to your dad some more, and then we can do whatever you want." He nods before he goes back to drawing, and you smile as you watch him before you and Aomine make your way out of the room.

"Thanks again for doing this," he says as you walk down the hallway and back into the open space. "I owe you a ton."

"Don't worry about it. It is my job after all." He doesn't say anything immediately after you speak, and you try to think of anything to quickly fill the silence. "Well, thanks for showing me around. I'm gonna go back with Taj," you say, hoping that your words don't sound forced.

"Alright," he responds lightly. "I'm gonna be in the house, so if you need anything just let me know." You give him a nod before you turn around, and you try your best not to walk away too fast, making your way back to Taj's room.

He looks up when you walk in, and you sit down next to him on the floor. "Whatcha drawing?" you ask softly.

"A dragon," he answers quietly.

"Are they your favorite?" He nods, and you don't bother to ask him any more questions, deciding just to sit there and watch. He's pretty good, being able to tell what he's drawing without even asking him; you only did so to try and make conversation. You look around his room, seeing that there isn't anything on the walls, and the only things in the room are the furniture and some toys here and there.

"Can you draw?" he asks you suddenly, and you look at him to see that he's done drawing.

"Not really," you answer honestly. "But I can try." You grab a piece of paper and some crayons. "You want me to draw anything?"

"Can you draw a castle?"

"That seems easy enough." He moves closer to you once you start to draw, his attention solely focused on your paper, and a smile appears on your face at his actions. Your castle looks pretty decent, and you add bricks for a little more detail. Taj wants you to add in some more landscape, so you do, and he finishes it off by drawing another dragon.

"This looks amazing!" you praise. "You wanna hang it up?" you ask, and he nods quickly in response. You both stand, leaving the room to try and find some tape. He follows you down the stairs, and you make your way to the office to see if there's any tape in there. You cheer softly when you find some, and you tear the pieces off.

"You wanna hang this up in your room?" He nods and both of you make your way back upstairs, and you put the tape on the drawing before you hand it to him. He stands in the middle of the room, spinning around slowly trying to figure out where he wants to put it.

You watch him move over to his bed, and he stands on top of it so he can put it on the wall over his bed. You pick up a crayon off the floor, and walk over to him as he smooths down the paper. "Let's write our names, hm?" You hand it to him so he can write his first, and you take it from him, writing yours along with today's date. "Looks good, doesn't it?"

"Yeah," he says happily before he turns around to give you a hug.

"You wanna do something else or do you wanna keep drawing?" you ask.

"Drawing," he answers, getting off the bed, and you found yourself back on the floor next to him. You opt to watch him, only drawing something when he asks you, and soon enough, his once plain walls are covered in his drawings.

"You wanna ask anything about me?" you try once it seems like he's done enough drawing.

"Can I?"

"Sure! Ask me anything you want."

You smile when you see the wheels turning in his head as he thinks of what to ask, and you wait patiently for this question. "How old are you?"

You laugh softly, knowing that was coming. "I'm twenty-five."

"Is babysitting your job?"

"One of them, yes," you answer with a nod. "I work another job remotely but not for the whole year. I also play volleyball."

"Really? Is it fun?" he asks, clearly engaged in the conversation.

"Yeah, I have lots of fun! I love volleyball. You wanna see me play?" He nods quickly, you pull your phone out of your pocket before scrolling through your gallery to find a video from one of your tournaments. You find, turning your phone to the side and moving it towards him. He moves closer to you, and you point at the screen once the video starts. "That's me on the right."

He watches the whole thing, completely engaged. "Woah! You're so cool!"

"Why, thank you," you laugh, easily accepting the compliment. "You wanna try it out?" He nods quickly, and you both stand up again, this time on the way to your car. Aomine's in the living room watching TV, and he's looking at his phone when he hears you both coming down the stairs.

"How long have you been playing?" Taj asks you as you walk through the house.

"Since middle school." Aomine smiles as he watches you interact, completely ignoring him, but he doesn't mind it at all. He wonders in his head where you're going, and he watches the both of you disappear out the front door. Only a couple of minutes pass by before the both of you are coming back through the door, but this time Taj has a volleyball in his hands.

Aomine figures you both are going to play in the backyard, and he can't help but thin about how Taj interacts with you completely different than he interacts with him. He didn't even know he could talk that much, and this seems like the happiest he's ever seen him. It makes a sour taste form in Aomine's mouth, so he tries his best to brush it off and focus on the TV. Sadly, he isn't able to do it for long.

You've been babysitting Taj for about a month now, and you're glad that you haven't been seeing Aomine as much. The only time you do is when he comes back from practice or from games. You stay in the house until he comes home, and then you take your leave. You do it rather quickly so that he doesn't try to start up any conversations with you. Most of the nights you're lucky since he seems too tired to talk, but other nights, you have to try and dodge the small talk.

You don't really have anything you want to talk about with Aomine, and you know that it's just going to end up being awkward, so you'd rather just avoid it. Right now, you're sitting on the couch in the living room with the TV on, but you're mostly paying attention to your phone. Since it's Friday night, you let Taj stay up for a little bit longer since he doesn't have to get up early tomorrow.

Your body tenses for a split second when you hear the keys in the front door, but you quickly compose yourself before Aomine opens the door. He smiles tiredly when he sees you, and you give him a tight-lipped smile as you stand. You start to pack your stuff up, making sure you have everything when Aomine walks up to you.

"Hey, I just wanted to thank you for watching for Taj. I don't know how I can ever repay you." You chuckle a bit as you shake your head, shoving your hands in the back pockets of your jeans.

"Whaddya want, Aomine?" you sigh.

"What?"

"You always start with something like that when you're gonna ask me for something." He huffs a bit, rubbing his hand over the back of his neck.

"Okay, okay," he sighs. "I've got a tournament coming up, but it's out of the state. I'll be gone for about a week."

"So, you want to be go from babysitter to nanny?" you say, and you smile a bit when he starts to panic.

"You don't have to. I can try and find someone to watch him--"

"Aomine, chill. I'm just fucking with you," you laugh, and he relaxes as he smiles.

"Are you sure?"

You nod quickly. "Yes. I love watching Taj, and I can do my work remotely, so it all works out."

He sighs in relief. "Thank you so much. I owe you big time."

"Don't worry about it. I hope you guys do well."

"Thanks," he responds, and you can tell it's about to get awkward. "Is Taj already asleep?"

"I'm not sure. I let him stay up a little longer tonight since he doesn't have school tomorrow," you answer, and at that, you head towards his room with Aomine in tow. You softly knock on the door, stepping inside to see Taj asleep on the floor. You pout softly as you carefully walk over to him, and you try to pick him up without waking him.

He stirs as soon as you get him into your arms, and you stop moving, smiling when he looks at you. "Let's get you changed, okay?" you tell him quietly, and he nods sleepily, rubbing his eyes. He puts on his pajamas quickly before crawling into bed, and you tuck him before sitting next to him.

"Thanks for letting me stay up," he whispers.

"Of course, Taj."

"Are you leaving?"

"Yeah, I am," you say with a nod. "Sleep tight, okay? I'll see you soon." He nods, sitting up to give you a hug. You pull the blanket back up when he lays down, giving him a kiss on the forehead before you stand up and walk towards the door.

"Goodnight, Taj," Aomine says from the doorway, but he's already fallen back asleep. You turn the light off, slowly closing the door before you walk back downstairs. You grab your stuff, heading out of the door, and as per usual, Aomine walks you to your car.

"I'll, uh, see you later?"

"Yeah," you mumble. "Goodnight, Aomine," you say as you get into your car.

"Goodnight," he responds softly, standing in the driveway until you drive away and he can't see you anymore.

~

Aomine's tournament is in a couple of days, but he actually has to leave during the weekend since the games start on that Monday. Aomine gave you a key to his house once you started watching Taj, so you let yourself in, seeing Taj sitting on the couch. He smiles in surprise, jumping and running over to give you a hug before you can barely close the door.

"What are you doing here?" he asks excitedly.

"Your dad's got a tournament out of the state, so I'm gonna stay here with you. That sound good?"

"Yeah!" he exclaims as he quickly nods his head. "That means we can play volleyball!"

You laugh. "Yes, it does!" Aomine comes down the stairs with a duffel bag on his shoulder and a suitcase which he rolls it up by the door.

"Thank you again for doing this. I really appreciate it."

"You're welcome, Aomine."

Aomine takes his phone out of his pocket to check the time. "Okay, I gotta catch my flight. I'll see you later. See ya, Taj," he finishes, giving him a fist bump before he heads out of the door, locking it behind him.

"So, what do you wanna do first?" you say, turning to Taj. "Have you already eaten?"

"Yeah, I had cereal not too long ago," he answers. He says he wants to watch TV for now since cartoons are still playing, and you sit with him on the couch while you start to do some work. It's not much, but you want to get out of the way so that it's not over your head for the rest of the week.

Taj asks you about what you're doing soon after you start, and you spend most of your time explaining what you're doing as you do your work. The cartoons are soon forgotten as he keeps his focus on what you're doing. He helps you out on some of the work when he asks, and you're relieved when you're finally done, seeing that it didn't even take nearly as long as you thought it would.

You shut down your laptop, putting all of your work back in your bag, and you ask Taj if there's anything that he wants to do. He wants to play volleyball, so you go grab it out of the car before you walk with him out into the backyard. You always expect to be outside for a long time with kids, but it seems like Taj never wants to stop.

You were passing with him for a while until you got a bit tired, so you decided to sit down. He wanted to learn even more, so you spend the rest of the time teaching him the basics and the techniques of everything. You stay sitting down, tossing him the ball as you encourage him whenever he messes up.

You check your phone to see that it's already lunch time, and that's enough to convince Taj to quit for a while so you both can eat. You look in the fridge to see that there isn't a lot of food for you to cook, so you ask Taj if there's anything specific that he wants.

"Can we have pasta?" he asks as you close the fridge.

"Do you want any sauce?"

"The red kind, what's it called?"

"Marinara," you laugh as you answer. "We'll have to go to store for that if you're up for it?" He nods, running to his room to get his shoes. Aomine left his car seat, so you grab it, hooking it up in the car. Taj is quiet on the way to the store, and you periodically look at him in your rearview mirror, seeing that he's looking out the window.

He holds your hand when you get out of the car, and you let him push the basket around, keeping your hand on it so that he doesn't hit anything. Since you're going to be at the house for the week, you buy enough food to last the both of you. You let Taj pick out any snacks that he wants and any food that he wants to eat this week. When you head to the check out, he's happy to pack everything in the reusable bags that you brought, and you help him pack them while the person scans the items.

After you pay, you have to help Taj push the basket since it's heavier with all of the stuff you bought. You hand him the lighter things as you transfer all of the groceries to the car, and you let him put the cart back into the corral. You make the drive back to the house, and Taj helps you bring the groceries in before helping you put them all away.

He wants to help you make lunch, so you grab his step stool from the bathroom, setting in the kitchen. You let him put the pasta in the water once it boils, watching carefully to make sure he doesn't burn himself. There isn't much too do with pasta, but he seems excited nonetheless to be making it. You drain the pasta once it's done, and he makes his own plate, taking it to the table.

You pour him some juice before you take that and the sauce over to him. You make sure he doesn't pour too much sauce over his pasta before he hands it to you, and he talks your ear off as you both eat. You smile as you listen to him, only prompting him with questions whenever it seems like he's done talking about something.

When you're done eating, you decide to wash the dishes now so that they don't stack up, and Taj helps you with that as well. You try to tell him that he could go play or do something else, but he says that he wants to stay and help you. You find your way back to the couch after you're done with the dishes, and you can tell that he's getting a bit tired. He moves onto your lap as you turn on some volleyball, and he's asking you questions about it until you don't hear him say anything.

You look down to see that he's sleep, and you smile softly as you turn your attention back to the TV, making sure that he's comfortable. You feel your eyelids getting heavy, and you relax further against the couch, watching the TV until you finally fall asleep.

~

You've never had a week go by so fast. Aomine is supposed to be back in a couple of days, and you start to realize that you'll miss spending your days with Taj. Usually, you just pick him up from school and watch him for the night while Aomine is at practice. Or if he's training in the mornings, you take him to school, and watch him until Aomine gets back. You honestly don't know how Taj'll react when Aomine gets back, but you don't worry about that right now.

A bed is calling your name, and after putting Taj in bed, staying with him until he finally went to sleep, you went to the bathroom to hop in the shower, doing your night routine before getting in the bed. Once you get comfortable, it doesn't take you long to fall asleep, rolling over one last time before you finally do.

You suddenly hear something, and you think you're dreaming until you feel something shaking you. You gasp softly as your eyes open, seeing Taj standing in front of you. You sigh heavily as you sit up, blinking the sleep out of your eyes as you look at the clock, seeing that you've been sleep for a few hours.

"Taj? What's wrong?" you whisper, scooting closer to the edge of the bed, and you can see that it looks like he's been crying, the only light in the room the moonlight coming in from the window. "What happened?"

"I had a bad dream," he mumbles. "Can I stay with you?" You nod silently, moving over and pulling the blankets back so that he can slide into the bed next to you. You lay back down, and he immediately attaches himself to you and you rub over his head. You don't ask about it since it doesn't seem like he wants to talk about it, and you can hear him sniffle every now and then.

Aomine periodically checked in on you, making sure everything was going okay and once again thanking you for watching Taj on such short notice. Since they didn't do so well at the tournament, they were able to come back a little earlier than expected, but they had to take a late flight because of that, and he never got around to telling you that he was on his way back home.

When he walks into the house, as he expected, it's quiet. He sighs heavily as he takes his shoes off, slowly making his way up the stairs as he sets his bags in his room. He walks down the hallway to check on Taj, and he frowns when he sees that his door is open. He opens it a little more to see that it's empty, and he looks around, wondering where he could be. He's walking down the hallway again when he hears voices, and he stops in front of one of the guest rooms, seeing you and Taj laying down.

He's about to step inside to announce that he's home, but when his ears tune into the conversation, he doesn't move.

"You and my dad used to date?" Taj asks and you nod. "Why aren't you together now?" he follows.

"Because I liked your dad more than he liked me," you tell him honestly, but you leave it at that.

Aomine chews at his lip as your answer wafts through his ears. He knows you didn't say what you wanted to say.

Taj looks down at his hands as he messes with his fingers. "Sometimes I feel like my dad thinks about basketball more than me." And it takes everything in Aomine for him not to reveal himself right then and there.

"Taj," you start, "what makes you say that?"

He shrugs. "Well, I didn't spend much time with him growing up, and then suddenly I was. But it didn't feel like he really liked me being here."

"Taj, I can tell you right now that that is not true," you quickly reassure. "Your dad loves you," you state. "He just has a really weird way of showing it."

He shifts his eyes to you. "How do you know?"

"Well, I know that he hasn't been staying at practice late as much as he usually does," you answer. "I think he's doing that so he can spend more time with you." It doesn't look like it convinces Taj, and Aomine didn't think he could ever feel so shitty. "Taj, I think you should talk to your dad about how you feel," you offer when he doesn't respond. "You might not think he'll listen, but I'm confident that he will."

"Do you think it'll change anything?"

"You won't know if you don't try, but I think it will," you insist. "Is there anything you really want to ask him?"

Taj thinks about it for a bit. "If he's gonna at least be home for my birthday," he says. "I know that he can't help it if he has to play, but sometimes he doesn't even come home."

God, you wish there was something you could say to make Taj even the least bit happy. You pull him into a hug, and after a while, he wraps his arms around you. "I can be there with you to talk to him if that'll help. I'll even make sure he's there and doesn't bail out."

"Okay," he whispers into your shirt.

Aomine never says anything, slowly and quietly stepping away from the door as he makes his way to the bar in the open space down the hall.

Taj has fallen asleep again, and you slowly peel away from him, careful not to wake him, before you tiptoe out of the room with the intention of using the bathroom. You walk out into the hallway, the conversation you just had playing through your head. You see a light on down the hall when you walk out, and you frown as you carefully walk towards it. You peek around the corner to see Aomine sitting at the bar. His back is towards you, but it doesn't look like he's drinking anything, but his head is in his hands.

You sigh in relief since it's not a stranger, and you walk over to him. "When did you get back?" you ask, but he doesn't respond. "Aomine?" you whisper, stepping closer to him.

"Are you okay?" you try when he stays silent.

He turns to you suddenly which makes you jump back a bit, and the look in his eyes is something you've never seen. Not in Aomine's eyes. "You're not gonna tell me anything, are you?" he whispers, his voice cracking a little, and you can finally notice that his eyes are red. You could only tell when you got closer because the only light is coming from the lights under the bar.

"What are you talking about?" you ask, worry starting to bury itself in your chest.

"I heard your conversation with Taj earlier." Your chest rises with a silent gasp before you audibly let the breath out, your eyes falling shut in a long blink.

"Aomine--"

"I'm a piece of shit, aren't I?" You don't say anything and he scoffs bitterly, a weak laugh coming from him after. "I shouldn't be a fucking father. I shouldn't have the responsibility of a child." You're silent, truly at a loss for words. "Hell, the only reason why you're here now is because I fucking lost him in the damn store!" he laughs, looking back down at the bar, and you play with your fingers as your nerves start to react to your uneasiness. "And you can't even deny it."

"Aomine, it's not like everyone knows how to be a parent right out of the gate--"

"Don't make excuses for me," he interjects, his voice rising. "I had more than enough time to get my shit together, but even though Taj has been here for years, I just didn't wanna believe it. He doesn't deserve that." He looks at you again. "What have I done to him?" he asks you, the question quiet in the air.

"What do you mean?"

"He has to have habits or something because of my shitty parenting," he answers. "If you could even call it that." You don't want to respond because you know your answer will just make him spiral even more. But Aomine can tell by the look on your face that you have answers ready on your tongue. "Tell me," he quietly demands.

"Listen--"

"Don't try to go soft on me. Tell me." You sigh, running your hand down your face before you take a couple of steps closer to him.

"Look, I'm not a professional, but from what I've seen from other experiences in the past," you start, "he, uh, seems very independent for his age. He seems to be way more willing to do things like helping wash the dishes, getting the groceries, stuff like that...instead of going to play or something," you say. "I'm not saying that's unusual, but it seems like he'd rather do anything with me than anything by himself."

"What else?" he presses quickly, his eyes back on the wood, tapping his finger against it.

"When it comes to physical touch, he seems okay with hugging. But if it goes on longer than that, then he shies away from it." You look down at the floor, taking another heavy sigh before you continue. "Which could be because he's always been rejected by someone whom he wanted to be held by." You glance at Aomine without lifting your head, and he pulls his lips down as he nods.

"Keep going."

"This--"

"I need to hear it."

You can feel your heart start to sink, but you continue anyway. "Ever since I've been coming here, he's broken out of his shell." You start on a positive note, but Aomine knows it's about to take a horrible turn. "But if I stopped coming or if he has no promise that I'm coming back, it will definitely affect him...a ton."

Daiki laughs softly, rubbing his eyes as he continues. "I'm surprised he hasn't run away yet." You make the mistake of showing a reaction to his words, and he prying you to elaborate.

"The day at the store, he could've been trying to," you admit. "It's just a hunch, but that was the only time since I've met Taj that I've seen him on the verge of tears. I'm guessing he was standing in an aisle for who knows how long to see if you would notice." You don't know why you're still talking. "And when you didn't, he found me."

He huffs. "But he knows that he's a kid and that he probably won't get very far. He's also very aware of the dangers if he does run away."

"Poor kid," he muses. "He's got two parents that don't give a fuck about him."

"Aomine, that's not true--"

"He'd probably be better off with a different family," he counters suddenly, and you can feel your uneasiness morphing into irritating anger the more he cuts you off.

"Putting him in the system would only be worse for him," you state.

"Would it?" he questions with a heavy shrug, holding your gaze.

"Yes, he--"

"It would probably be better if I was somewhere far away from him--"

You're fuming. You step into his space before grabbing his face in your hand, turning his head to yours hard. "Shut. The. Fuck. Up." His eyebrows raise just a bit. "What do you want me to say, Aomine?! Yeah, you are a piece of shit father, you already know that!" you yell, making sure to keep your voice down since Taj is sleeping. "You're making fucking excuses! You need to grow the fuck up! Taj needs you now more than anything, and you're trying to send him off! Instead of being sorry, you need to be a damn father!"

Your voice still echoes in the quiet room even though it's just above a whisper. "You can fucking change, Aomine, but you're refusing to!" you scream. "You're right! Taj does deserve better than this! And stop putting yourself down so fucking much! That thinking is only going to transfer over in your parenting." Your fingers are starting to hurt from how hard your grip is on his face, but you're pissed. "You give a fuck about him, Aomine. My being here is proof of that. But you need to give a fuck about making the changes to being a better parent."

You let go of his face, but he doesn't move. "You need to get it together," you breathe. "Because this?" you say, pointing at him and moving your finger up and down. "Is pathetic." You turn around, not even giving him a second glance as you start toward the exit of the room. "When you find the Aomine I know, come find me."

You storm out of the room, and Aomine listens to your footsteps get quieter and quieter until he hears a door open and close. Your words are ringing loudly in his ears, and he softly runs his fingers over his face where yours were. His mind isn't even running, the only thing on replay are those words. He loses track of how much time he spent sitting on that bar stool, and he doesn't even get a full night's sleep.

The conversation keeps him up almost all night.

[accirax]

Revisiting My Original DRDT Death Predictions

If you haven't been following what's going on over at @av-multifangan, Venus and I have been posting one of our fangans, Danganronpa: One Shot. Hooray! But, more relevantly to this post, we also posted the rules to a game that we've been playing for a long time-- a game through which you can score your performance at guessing how a fangan's kill order will go after viewing only its prologue.

Said old game was also invoked when we began watching DRDT, so I thought it would be a fun trip down memory lane to see what my genuine initial predictions for the entire killing game were after viewing just a little over an hour of Despair Time content.

While all of us non-cast-and-crew members obviously don't know the entire kill order at this point, I can rest assured that these predictions, well... ain't it. But, that's part of the point! To prove that even the creators of this predictions game can be terrible at it, and that there's no shame in making a guess and then changing your mind!

... Oh boy.

SPOILERS for DRDT through the end of Chapter 2, and IMPLIED SPOILERS for SDR2 and v3!

Well, no use in dilly-dallying. Here's my predictions sheet:

(god damn why is the quality so bad--)

If you haven't read the rules of our game, I'll quickly summarize them here. You have to predict the killing game using the most standard formula: one Chapter 1 victim and killer, one Chapter 2 victim and killer, double kill in Chapter 3 with one killer, one Chapter 4 victim and killer, one Chapter 5 victim and killer, and four survivors with a "surviving" (until Chapter 6) mastermind. These roles are listed out in rainbow order (Chapter 1 death = red, Chapter 6 = purple), and victims are marked with an X while killers are circled. The survivors are circled in purple, with a cyan star on the suspected mastermind.

At the end of the game, you gain points based on how far off you were, such that a low score is good. It's +2 points for getting the role wrong (victim vs killer/mastermind vs survivor), with an additional +1 point per chapter for how far you are off from the characters' last.

Although the quality is low, hopefully you can figure out what I predicted using those instructions-- or the image ID, if it's still too tricky. And, of course, I'm going to go through all of my choices below, starting with

XANDER in the role of CHAPTER 1 VICTIM

"Accirax," you may ask. "Why are you acting so doomed about your predictions when you literally got 1/4 of the confirmed deaths correct?" Unfortunately, my friend, I was already spoiled about Xander's death before I started watching DRDT. I'm very grateful that I had no idea about the circumstances of Xander's death (AKA, him stabbing Teruko) going in. But, I think I'd seen some thumbnail somewhere of Xander's BDA and knew he was a goner.

Hence, this was a free 0 pointer for me. I'm not that cool.

ARTURO in the role of CHAPTER 1 KILLER

Now, why I thought Arturo of all people would be the one to kill Xander is beyond me. I think my rationale was that, at the time, Arturo was giving me early death vibes, and this was the only spot I could put him in?*

This is one of the predictions that I know is wrong, because the Chapter 1 killer spot has already elapsed. The best I could do now points-wise is if Arturo is the Chapter 3 killer (I'd get +2 points for being two chapters off), which is definitely still feasible! Still, I wonder now if Arturo's vibe is too obvious for being a killer, and if he would ever be willing to put ~Julia Rosales'~ life in jeopardy by attempting to escape. J certainly isn't doing herself any favors with that Felicity reveal, at least.

ROSE in the role of CHAPTER 2 VICTIM

*This is where things get... a little complicated. As I already said, I had been spoiled to the fact that Xander was the Chapter 1 victim. However... I also thought I had been spoiled to the "fact" that Rose was the Chapter 2 victim?

I really don't know how this happened. I have a distinct memory of seeing a Tumblr post containing something that sort of looked like what I imagine an Ultimate Art Forger Lab could look like(?) talking about how the characters needed to investigate to figure out who killed the Ultimate it belonged to. I thought I remembered seeing Rose's face, but this was before I had ever watched any DRDT content. So, it's possible I had the wrong fangan, or accidentally stumbled into someone's AU.

It was pretty funny looking back on my Chapter 2 viewing experience, though. When Teruko got Rose's secret, I was like, "oh, it totally makes sense that DRDTdev would give Teruko Rose's secret as a natural way to hear about Rose's backstory before she dies. Clever." And then we got to the day of the motive reveal, and Rose is there, and David says that Arei of all people is missing, and my jaw dropped. "Spoilers," indeed.

It sucked for me at the time of making this sheet, though, because Rose was, like, the only woman I got survivor vibes from (other than Teruko). But, I thought I couldn't mark her as such! Of course, Rose could be a Chapter 3 victim for all I know, meaning that being "forced" to put her in this spot could actually be good for my predictions. However, scoring 0 points on Rose is fully off the table now, which is a bummer.

DAVID in the role of CHAPTER 2 KILLER

"Why couldn't you have put Arturo as Chapter 2 killer--" I also thought I had been spoiled that David was the Chapter 2 killer. If I didn't make Arturo the first killer, the earliest I could have put him would be Chapter 3 victim, which is hardly early at all. And yes, I thought I'd been spoiled on three out of "four" of the canonical deaths when I originally watched the series. That's just my life (/lh).

At least this one is obvious to figure out why I thought it was the case. I started watching DRDT in May of 2023, about a month and a half after 2-11 dropped. Hence, I knew DRDT was on hiatus, but I was under the impression that it was a hiatus after Chapter 2 had finished. I'd also seen 2-11's thumbnail, recognized it as David, and (along with having spoilers about David's "true personality") concluded that David must be the Chapter 2 killer.

Live footage of me watching 2-11 for the first time:

"Ah, there he goes... Man, we're gonna have to wrap this murder up quick, huh? I guess that's why he's admitting to it... Haha, 'Teruko, we fucked up'... WAIT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S A HIATUS ON AN UNSOLVED MURDER?!"

I decided quickly afterwards that I no longer believed that David would be the Chapter 2 killer.

Finally, we're done with roles that already happened/that I had "spoilers" for! You'd think that would automatically make them better (because most of them, at least, have not been disproven), but there are still plenty of things that contradict what I believe will happen now, at least.

LEVI and HU in the role of CHAPTER 3 VICTIMS

Relatively, though, this one isn't that bad. Don't get me wrong, these two aren't my leading candidates for Chapter 3 victims, but I'm not actively opposed to this happening.

The idea of Levi nearly evading dying at the end of Chapter 2 only to actually become a victim in Chapter 3 is a little puzzling, but still narratively on the table, imo. So much happens in a DRDT Chapter's worth of daily life that Levi could definitely still serve enough of a narrative purpose to justify his continued survival/eventual victimhood in that Chapter. Especially if that purpose had something to do with the fact that he was injured-- for instance, if it's important for an Arturo arc of learning that he actually enjoys taking care of others, or if the killer has to exploit Levi's injuries in order to have the strength necessary to take him out.

Meanwhile, I've long held the opinion that Hu will be a big character in the Chapter 3 Daily Life by virtue of not having done a whole lot in the Chapter 1 or 2 Daily Lives-- she definitely has content, but the majority of the important stuff occurs in the Chapter 2 Trial. Currently, I'm of the opinion that that spike of content wouldn't result in a same-Chapter death, but following in the footsteps of Xander and Arei, it definitely could. Same with Levi if he's a Chapter 3 focus, honestly.

J in the role of CHAPTER 3 KILLER

I really still want to believe that J will be a killer. Why? It's because, in my opinion, Ultimate Effects Artist is a talent that is totally optimized for being a blackened, whether it actually happens or not. You know why the idea of J and Arei swapping places was so popular? Because Ultimate Effects Artist is the kind of talent you give someone if you want to pull a trick like that off!

However, all of that "murder is despicable" talk is really cramping my style. Why would J ever become a blackened after opposing the idea of murder so openly?

(It'd be pretty funny if it was all an act so that people would use that as an argument to her credit down the road.)

It's possible she could have a crisis of faith/breaking point that would change her mind, but I doubt that would occur as quickly as Chapter 3. Or result in her killing two people. Sigh.

AREI in the role of CHAPTER 4 VICTIM and EDEN in the role of CHAPTER 4 KILLER

OKAY HEAR ME OUT BEFORE YOU ACCUSE ME OF CALLING EDEN EVIL--

Chapter 4 is, oftentimes, the sacrifice chapter, right? It's a killer that makes everybody cry, because they'd never normally do something like this, but ultimately decided to kill in order to spare their friends and take the bullet themselves. I'm, like, 99% sure that's what I was imagining for Eden. Whatever the motive may be, Eden would be the small and scrawny sacrifice killer in sort of a reversal of the buff curse...

... taking out the mean bully girl that everybody hated as the victim, if she had to choose someone.

I'M SORRY I'M SORRY STOP HITTING ME WITH ROCKS-- (/j)

But yeah, I definitely remember predicting that part of the surprise of the case was that the small nerdy girl was able to take out the Ultimate athlete mean girl. I don't know how I managed to deduce that Eden and Arei would have an important relationship with one another after the prologue (in which they don't really talk at all, to my memory), yet managed to get it so horribly wrong. Predicting that Eden would kill Arei was just in my DNA, I guess, even if I originally envisioned it for a different chapter.

In the light of Ace being declared the Chapter 2 killer, this one is just embarrassingly wrong. Evidently, Eden would never stoop as low as to kill Arei. The good news for me, I suppose, is that Arei will only net me +2 points, as the role was correct (V=V) while the chapter was 2 off (4->2).

As for Eden being the Chapter 4 killer, that's not one of my top spots for her. If I had to pick, I'd probably guess either Chapter 3 victim (especially if paired with Charles Ch3 Victim, this could really knock the wind out of Teruko's sails if needed), Chapter 5 victim (allows her a long period in the story that isn't a survivor nor a killer), or just a survivor (and/or mastermind). If she were to be a killer, then maybe I'd predict Chapter 4 along the sacrifice angle? Not with Arei, though.

MIN in the role of CHAPTER 5 VICTIM

+6 points (5->1) (V->K) on Min is... not the greatest score. In fact, it's only one fewer than the general max possible character score of 7, reserved for Chapter 1 deaths mistaken as Survivors and vice versa.

I think my original prediction for Min was that she would not necessarily be Teruko's support character emotionally, but that she would be a useful aide when it came to solving the mysteries of the Class Trial. Then in Chapter 5, to force Teruko/the other innocent students to solve the high-stakes Trial on their own, she would have to disappear.

Looking back on it, I really enjoy how Teruko is far and away the best at solving the Class Trials in DRDT-- she would have already earned the title through her connections to, like, literally every character and theme in the story, but making her the principal mystery solver really hammers the idea that she should be the protagonist home. Having Min be on Team Spotless for even one Trial might have diminished that effect, so it makes sense that she became the first blackened. Girl was too powerful to live, smh.

WHIT in the role of CHAPTER 5 KILLER

Personally, I've always gotten the vibe that Whit is one of DRDTdev's Special Little Guys. Perhaps it was the way that he showed up in three character introductions-- Charles', Hu's, and his own-- that made me think he had Favorite Character Privileges. As such, even when (get ready for a truth bomb) I didn't really like Whit after watching the Prologue for the first time, I always thought he had late game energy.

(I don't know how much it really comes across from my blog, but I'm actually fairly critical of new series when I pick them up for the first time, unless I've heard many positive recommendations from friends/online personalities I admire. Other than the spoilers, I hadn't heard too much about DRDT before I started watching it, so, unaware of DRDTdev's writing skills, I was worried that Whit would essentially be a poor man's Kokichi. As someone who really likes Kokichi, that biased me against Whit. Then, of course, I actually watched the series and Whit won me over very quickly. And the rest is history :) )

I’m not really sure why I went killer over victim, other than the possible “I’m making Min the victim and therefore Whit has to be the killer.” Maybe it was that Kokichi-ness that made me think that he'd be the man behind the slaughter? ... Even if Kokichi wasn't actually the blackened in that case? It might've also been an effect of wanting him to be just that much closer to surviving, to fully break the hearts of everyone who was rooting for this Special Little Guy to survive.

Like, uh... me. Um. Well, I do genuinely currently think Whit will survive right now, so... I'm willing to take a +3 if that's true!

TERUKO in the role of MASTERMIND

Yeah, I predicted that Teruko would be the mastermind because I'm a basic bitch (/aff). Uh, I'm not being affectionate towards myself, to be clear. I'm only being affectionate to those who still hold the (fairly, I think) popular opinion that Teruko will be the mastermind of DRDT. She's a popular choice because there's a lot going for her! I still ranked her as third most likely back in my mastermind analysis!

Everyone who plays Venus' and my game is forced into the same default formula (to make comparative scoring easier), and that formula locks in the protagonist as a Chapter 6-er, because of how frequently that is the case. Even so, I feel fairly confident now that Teruko will survive until Chapter 6 anyways. The more times she says "I'm the Ultimate Lucky Student and I can't die" and then doesn't die, the weirder it would be if she suddenly did drop dead in, like, Chapter 4.

As for whether she actually is the mastermind... dude, I have no idea. Back at the time I wrote that post, I named J and Rose as my most likely candidates, but now J has gone on a whole anti-murder bend and I'm growing increasingly worried that Rose is going to be the Chapter 3 killer (probably unfounded, but still). That would leave Teruko as the most likely option, but Teruko's behavior at the end of Chapter 2 felt anti-mastermind coded to me, too, even if she forgot about it...!

We are not reviewing my mastermind theories here and now. Next!

CHARLES in the role of SURVIVOR

If you're a giant fucking nerd (/j), you might have noticed that I said I made my DRDT predictions after viewing "just a little bit over an hour of Despair Time content." However, the Prologue is under an hour. What gives?

Well, I... broke the rules of our game, actually. You're supposed to make your predictions sheet after viewing the Prologue only, but I went straight from watching the Prologue into Chapter 1 on the same day, and I forgot to make my sheet until watching Chapter 1 Episode 1. Sue me.

At any rate, I'm sure you can figure out how watching 1-1 would make me think that Charles would survive. Obviously, I knew that other characters beyond Charles would get focus in later episodes, but that still doesn't change the fact that DRDTdev chose to highlight Charles and Teruko's relationship as the first thing we saw in the first chapter of their story. Even without that extra content, though, he's also very reminiscent of Danganronpa's "Jerk" archetype, which survived in every canon DR game.

All that said... obviously, I don't think he's going to survive anymore.

I've been saying that Charles is a Chapter 3 victim-- at least since that analysis I just linked, even-- and I will probably continue to say it until proven false by the story itself. He is simply arcing too fast, and Whit needs to be confronted with that grief he prefers to ignore, no matter what his eventual placement is. We got one real Trial with Charles to prove what a smarty-pants he is, but now that he's pulled that "out of your element" card, he's off to break down into two or more simpler substances. AKA, decompose.

If he's not a Chapter 3 victim, though, Survivor is at least back on the table.

ACE in the role of SURVIVOR

Here we have it! Proof positive that I (falsely) believed that Ace would be a survivor all on my own, without taking into account anyone else's opinions! My incorrectness is mine and mine alone!!! (/j)

So, yeah. Funny coward man go brrrr and character arc into survival, except then he didn't. I have to imagine that's the basic premise behind why so many people believed that Ace would survive. I don't really have much to say about this choice beyond that.

I don't like that I'm already tanking another +6 points (S->K) (6->2) from Ace, though. Save me Xander-zero-point spoilers, you're my only hope.

VERONIKA in the role of SURVIVOR

Whaaaaaaaat was I cooking here?

I guess I kind of remember. I think I was imagining Veronika along the lines of a poor man's Sonia (like I said, critical) due to her more apologetic attitude towards rambling and presenting others with horror concepts in the Prologue. With my prediction that Whit would die in Chapter 5, I guess I might've also been thinking that Veronika could then fill in that "comic relief" void in his absence? I also had Ace there, though. Moot point; every DRDT character has the capacity to be hilarious.

There are a lot of places I could see Veronika landing in this killing game, but survivor really isn't one of them. I could see Veronika as a Chapter 3 victim or killer for The Vibes, Chapter 5 victim or killer if she takes on more of a main antagonist role, or Mastermind also for The Vibes. But survivor is just... odd. At least from this point in the story, what business does the "fangirling over acevi dying" girl have taking up one of those coveted survivor slots? Surely either someone would think to kill her or she would decide to kill before four more chapters elapse!

That being said, locking in Veronika as a late game character isn't terrible in my eyes. Being "barred" from making Rose a survivor, I remember that Veronika was the girl who I initially got the second most late game energy from. Those Chapter 5 or Mastermind scenarios won't score terribly here if they come to pass.

NICO in the role of SURVIVOR

I want to mention here that, despite my other spoilers, I did not know that Nico was nonbinary going into Despair Time. Therefore, I didn't make Nico a survivor under the premise of "I'll have two girls, two boys, and one enby survive!" I don't really remember why I did make Nico a survivor, though.

My best guess is that I put them there for cast composition purposes. From the Prologue, all of Charles, Ace, and Veronika are pretty over-the-top in their own ways: Charles is overly condescending, Ace is really loud, and Veronika is an exaggerated fangirl. Adding in a quieter character like Nico would have been a nice way balance to the others... or at least, so I thought with only the Prologue to go off of. Now I know that Ace and Nico surviving together was incredibly unlikely to be the case.

Speaking of Ace, now that he's dead (and therefore can't be a survivor), my opinions of whether Nico could survive have definitely gone up. However, I still don't think that Nico surviving is particularly likely.

There's definitely potential for redemptive survivors in DRDT with the "fighting your fate" theme they seem to be setting up. But, I think that's more likely to play out with someone who might have committed murder before the killing game (like Levi) or someone who did terrible things, but never went so far as to physically attempt another student's murder (like David), than someone who actually attacked someone else and nearly succeeded. For media in general, I think it's much easier for audiences to forgive something that happened off-screen and/or to characters that barely exist than something that we saw visible evidence of on a character who many people adore. Nico's attempted murder just seems like a big hurdle to overcome on their path to survival, dude.

That being said, I've written before that for both in-universe and meta reasons, I don't think we'll ever see Nico as a blackened, which already eliminates, like, half of my options moving forward. Logically, that would conclude that if I don't think that Nico will become a victim, then they're likely to survive. I do (currently) think that Nico will probably be a victim sometime in the future, even if I'm not certain in which chapter. For the sake of my score on Nico specifically, I guess I'm rooting for Chapter 5. I already know that they wouldn't be robbing Min of a perfect zero, at least.

And that's my tally so far, a total of 14 points out of a possible... well, I actually don't know what the highest possible score is, both because math is hard and because I don't know what bonus rules, if any, will come into play in DRDT's future. It's 14 points across 4 characters, which comes out to an average of 3.5 points per character.

Comparatively, most of our game sheets have come out somewhere in the high-30 to mid-40 points range (predicting is hard). Across 16 characters, means that it's usually an average of, like, 3 points per character. So, I'm doing worse than usual, but not by a whole lot...!

But, how well I do isn't what matters. The important thing is that I had fun while making it, and got to think about what patterns and possibilities can arise when you look at the basic facts of a character's simplified personality and talent in time with their role in the story!

So if you want to have fun making a predictions sheet like this of your own, you should totally go read Danganronpa: One Shot's Prologue (before Chapter 1 starts airing on Friday) over at @av-multifangan and fill out that game's prediction sheet. That would mean that this shameful shameless attempt at cross-promotion would have succeeded at one of its desired effects! Or, if that's not your cup of tea, you could also fill out a predictions sheet for DRDT moving forward, and just acknowledge that Xander, Min, Arei, and Ace were placed after the fact. Who knows, maybe I'll make a sheet like that too, so we can compare.

Thanks for walking down memory lane with me, and I hope to be back with more DRDT content soon!

[stevie-petey]

but don't you remember? (august, honey, you were mine)

﹂ season four of "come home"

it's senior year and everything has changed. though steve harrington is now your boyfriend, not all of the change has been good. jonathan is gone, dustin is pulling away, the party is divided, and max's sunken eyes remind you of her brother's. all the change threatens to suffocate you. then one phone call, multiple dead bodies, and a song from your past changes everything you thought you once knew. time has never been your friend, especially when it reopens old wounds. (which only complicates things between you and steve). (and the upside down makes everything worse). (as usual).

episode one - the hellfire club: el writes to you as if youre her husband away at war, you debate the intricate nature of liking boobies with robin and steve, lucas is your beloved while eddie munson is your sworn enemy, steve accidentally exposes your (horribly hidden) daddy issues, dustin is an angsty teen, and jonathan really loves to drop emotional bombshells on you. can you believe this all happens in one day ? lol cheers to senior year !

episode two - vecnas curse: you and billy play marco polo, max interrupts a saturday morning breakfast at the henderson household, robin crushes steves dream of becoming a 1950s housewife, reefer rick has an odd taste in movies, boathouses are creepy in the dark, and eddie munson likes it when you pull his hair.

episode three - the monster and the superhero: you and steve can never have a normal conversation, dustin threatens nasa, eddie sadly eats his cereal because youre mean to him, youre once again nancys biggest fan, dustin and steve have an awkward heart to heart, and you and max become felons together and trauma bond (again) !

episode four - dear billy: steve almost hits lucas with a lamp, you try to trick your boyfriend into a gloomy arrangement, steve and nancy have a Talk, robin suddenly becomes an academic weapon, and max threatens legal action, gets really into hallmark cards, and levitating. all in that order.

episode five - the nina project: you and dustin steal pancakes to spite ted wheeler, steve just wants one morning of peace, nancy takes you to a haunted house, cobwebs are surprisingly intimate to remove from someone, and vecna decides to play flashlight tag with everyone. hes so sweet :)

episode six - the dive: dustin rejects the pity pringles you offer, eddie is straight up not having a good time, nancy does some investigative journalism about you and steve (gossips with robin), and steve suddenly decides he wants to take up scuba diving. for some reason. but hey ! title drop time !

episode seven - the massacre at hawkins lab: bats are really fucking annoying to fight, you always somehow end up critically injured, nancy carries the group on her back as always, eddie gives steve relationship advice (embarassing, tbh), interdimensional bike riding is lowkey fun, and you take a trip down memory lane.

episode eight - papa: steve is on the brink of a constant nervous breakdown, eddie questions your taste in music, you and max go halfsies on your lives, angry hicks are scary, and the end of the world is near so of course now is the time for every emotional conversation ever. duh !

episode nine - the piggyback: operation save hawkins is a go. youre eagle one, steve is currently doing that, eddie is youd be lying if you said you havent thought about it, nancy is it happened once in a dream, robin is if you had to pick a girl, and dustin is eagle two. what could possibly go wrong ? spoiler alert: everything. literally everything goes wrong. might as well break a few promises while youre at it. for the plot. but at least its over, right? .... right?

⌑ status: COMPLETE (for now)

⌑ season four title based on this song x

⌑ blurbs set within "come home" can be found here x

⌑ “come home” season masterlist

*note: this is a part of my stranger things rewrite, “come home”, and other seasons can be found linked above :)

[matty-bear]

I was the one who requested A Trip Down Memory Lane. I absolutely love it. If you were to make another sister reader story, you should do a part 2 of the triplets raiding her house. I think that would be an awesome fic

Ps. Thank you so much for writing my request. Love the fics

The “House Raid”

type: request ! read part one here ! 

pairing: sturniolo x little sister 

warnings: sfw, fluffy, lighthearted sibling banter 

summary: the triplets finally crash over at your place ! who knew the chaotic yet fun hangout would turn into a sleepover ? (the boys knew, you didn’t) 

notes: omg azul finally posting?? so glad to be getting back on my writing grind :3 apologies in advance for how long this is i might’ve gone a lil overboard 😭 anywho, happy reading and enjoy! <3 

WC: 4.9K 

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“Loki!” You stumble to a quick halt when your Bombay cat slips underneath the sofa, the clattering of his claws slowly coming to a stop. An exasperated sigh escapes you as you get down on your knees and lower your head so you can peek underneath the furniture. “Loki~” You call out softly, “Come here, baby.” 

As you begin to tap your pointer finger on the floorboards, the sound of claws clattering on the floor sounds from behind you. You quickly shift your focus from Loki camping under the sofa to your snowshoe cat who’s calmly making his way over to you. “Hey, Clyde.” You greet with a smile. The cat meows softly at your greeting and takes a seat where your head is lying on the floor. “Your brother is under the sofa.” 

Clyde meows again, this time a little longer, before he stretches his front legs, his tail sticking straight up as he does so. You eye him for a moment before turning your head to look back under the sofa. “Loki, come on. Matt’s gonna be here in a few minutes and he’s gonna want to meet all of you.” 

Nick texted you yesterday that they would be coming over to quote on quote, “raid your house” today. Ever since you received the message, you took it upon yourself to tidy up your place and make it look as nice as possible. The boy said they should be over by five o’clock if Chris wouldn’t demand a pit stop, which seemed unreasonable for Nick considering that they didn’t live that far from you. In fact, the drive from your place to theirs was only  30-minutes, maybe a little longer depending on traffic and such. 

Now, you didn’t have a very large place since it was just you and your cats living there so you didn’t have much to clean. However, since you have a cat that constantly wants to play and have you running around the house, the cleaning took a lot longer than expected. You were grateful that your other two other cats were relatively on the calmer side so you didn’t have to worry about constantly keeping an eye out for them. However, when it came to Loki, it seemed like you were handling a toddler at times. 

When a soft meow sounds from the darkness of the underside of the sofa, you groan and roll into your back. Your eyes flicker up to Clyde who’s intently looking down at you, his tail slowly waving behind him. “Where's Bonnie? In the playroom?” You ask.

The snowshoe cat meows and looks over at the room across the one you guys are currently in. Your eyes follow the cat’s gaze and you squint your eyes to take a peek in the room through the small space made between the door and the doorframe. 

When your eyes manage to catch a quick glimpse of a white tail snake around the bottom of the cat tower, you sigh softly and rest your head back down on the cold wooden floorboards. You mindlessly stuff your hand in the pocket of your sweatpants to grab your phone. Once the device is pulled out of your pants and you bring it up to your face, you turn it on. The time 4:55 PM immediately greets you in thin red letters. 

Your brothers should be here in five minutes. 

“Loki, I'm not gonna move or reach under the sofa to get you.” You say, turning your head to take a quick glance under the sofa. When a mew runs through your ears, you sigh and put your phone back in your pocket before boosting yourself up into a standing position. “Come out when you want to, I suppose.” 

As you make your way to the kitchen, Clyde follows close behind you in a small, joyous trot. When you stop in front of the fridge and pull one of the doors open, the cat leaps up onto the marble countertop next to the appliance. “You think this will be enough sodas, Clyde?” You turn your head to look over at the snowshoe cat who’s licking his arm. 

The cat quickly halts his actions and looks over at you, his eyes shifting over to your shoulder. When you give the cat a small nod, he leaps onto your shoulder and gets himself situated before bending down slightly to peer into the fridge which is half full of Pepsi, Dr. Pepper, and Root Beers. Clyde meows softly and paws the side of your face gently. 

You nod your head again and shut the door of the fridge with a soft thud before turning around on your heels and scanning the house from the spot you're standing. “Is your litter box clean?” You ask, turning your head slightly to look over at Clyde who’s now comfortably lying on your shoulder. The cat meows softly with a nod of the head. “Alright, I'm trusting you.”

Just as you go to return back to the living room, the muffled sound of car doors shutting runs through your ears, followed by faint chatter. In the blink of an eye, Clyde jumps off your shoulder and sprints to the door. Bonnie, your ragdoll kitten, also makes her first appearance of the day as she runs out of the playroom to go to the door.

She takes a seat next to Clyde and intently looks up at the door, her tail slowly waving behind her in anticipation. You can’t help but chuckle at the sight and make your way over to the front door as well to unlock it. The moment you twist the last lock, muffled knocking comes from the other side of the door. 

“FBI open up!” You hear someone exclaim. this kid. 

You open the door with a small shake of the head, your eyes immediately landing on your brothers who are standing on your porch with wide smiles. 

“You’re not fooling anyone, Chris.” You say with a soft chuckle. 

“You could tell that was me?” Chris asks, a single finger pointing at his chest.

“Yeah.” You giggle softly when a small pout appears on Chris’ lips. You tear your focus away from the brunette to look over at Nick and Matt who are looking behind you with slightly widened eyes. “What?”

You quickly look behind you to try to find what the two are staring at, however, when your eyes land on Bonnie and Clyde who are now standing and gazing up at the two brunettes in front of them, you smile softly. “Here, you guys come inside and I'll introduce them to you.” 

With a small hand wave, the three boys make their way inside your house. As Chris and Nick take a quick glance around the place, Matt slowly approaches Bonnie and Clyde who are still standing behind you. When the two cats stop backing up, he crouches down in front of them and sticks his hand out to allow the two to smell him. 

“Oh my God, I love how simplistic your place is, it’s so cute.” Nick gushes, a small smile overtaking his lips. 

“Thank you!” You exclaim with a wide smile. “I’d give you guys the house tour right now but I think someone would rather play with my cats.” 

You and the two boys in front of you look down at Matt who is playful with Bonnie and Clyde. A wide smile is plastered on his lips and he giggles when Clyde nuzzles his head into his side. When Chris clears his throat, the male quickly picks his head up and meets eyes with the three of you. “I think they like me,” Matt says softly, shooting you guys a smile before diverting his focus back to the two cats who are now attempting to climb him. 

~~~

“This is my room.” You say as you swing open the door to your bedroom. 

“Oh my God,” Chris mumbles, his jaw dropping in awe as he steps inside your cozy lit room. 

“You do have the plushies I got you!” Nick exclaims as he quickly makes his way to the small stack of plushies you have atop your bed. A wide smile overtakes the brunette’s features as his eyes shift over to the two larger Hello Kitty plushies that sit next to your nightstand. He places a gentle hand on top of one of the plushie's heads, his thumb gently caressing over its fur which is still soft as though it was bought yesterday. 

“I told you I still have them.” You smile as you make your way over to the male. 

“You’re a music geek aren’t you?” Chris asks. You quickly turn around to face the older boy  to see him admiring your wall and shelves full of vinyls and CDs, his free hand mindlessly fidgeting with the dials on your record player. 

“I literally can’t live without it.” You say with a small chuckle. “You can look through what I have by the way. Just be careful if you want to play one.” 

Chris rubs his hands together and jumps on his heels a few times out of pure excitement. You can’t help but laugh softly as he begins to drag a single finger across your wide selection of vinyls. After a moment, you shift your attention over to Matt who’s admiring your small art studio set up in the corner of the room.

A small baby blue paintbrush is being twirled between his fingers as he gazes at your easel which has a few blotches of dried paint on it. You quietly make your way over to the male and when you’re close enough, he notices your presence and turns his head to look at you. 

“This is so cool,” Matt mumbles with a small smile. 

“Thank you.” You smile. 

“Is this a new project you’re working on?” At the sight of the brunette pointing at the canvas resting on the easel, you gently nod your head. 

“I’m just in the sketching stage right now.” 

“Really? It looks blank.” 

“I don’t like sketching too hard. Sometimes I'm not able to get all the pencil markings off.” Matt gently nods his head, the hand twirling the paintbrush between his fingers not coming to a stop. “You wanna paint something? I have some extra canvases.” 

“Really?” You chuckle softly at the sight of Matt’s eyes lighting up, his mouth shaping into a small oval. 

“Yeah! It can be a little activity for the four of us.” 

“I’d love that. Should we ask Nick and Chris if they'd be down to do it?” 

After you nod your head, you turn around to the two mentioned males who are still in their previous positions. “Nick, Chris.” You call. The two quickly stop what they’re doing and look over at you. “You guys wanna paint something?” 

“Fuck yeah, are you kidding?” Chris replies as he gently returns a vinyl back to its spot on the shelf. 

“I’m so down,” Nick adds, with a wide smile. 

“Alright, where do you guys wanna do it?” You ask as you make your way over to your drawers full of paint. 

“Can we do it outside?” Matt asks, a single hand extending out in front of him. You take a quick glance over to the boy and nod your head before setting a few bottles of paint in his open palm. At the sight of the brunette assisting you with gathering the supplies. Nick and Chris quickly walk over and start helping you as well.

~~~

It didn’t take very long for the four of you to find yourselves outside, paint brushes, bottles, and canvases spread out on the bright green grass in your backyard. 

“Do you guys know what you want to paint?” You ask as you kneel down on the grass, your right hand firmly grasping four paint pallets. 

“I wanna paint a deer!” Chris exclaims.

“I wanna try to do a cabin or a forest,” Matt says as he begins to fiddle with a bottle of green paint. 

“Nick?” You ask, leaning forward to get a better look at the older boy who’s a little ways from you. 

“If I'm being honest I have no idea what I wanna paint. I think I'm just gonna wing it.” Nick admits as he brings a hand up to nervously rub his nape. 

“That’s fine! Don’t let yourself feel restricted to do anything.” You say with a small reassuring smile. “Before we start, I think you guys might want one of these.” 

You grab a single paint pallet from the stack you’re holding for yourself before handing the rest of them to Matt. After the male grabs one, he hands the last two to Chris. Once Nick gets his pallet, you begin to instruct the boys on what to do with the paint. After they give you rapid head nods to show that they understand everything you said, the four of you begin to gather the needed paint for y’all’s pieces. 

“You guys don’t mind if I play some music right?” You ask as you reach for your phone which is discarded on the grass next to you. 

“We don’t mind,” Chris replies as he flicks open a bottle of light brown paint, flinching harshly when some specks of paint splatter on his face.  

You nod to yourself and take a moment to scroll through your playlists, your eyes racking through the long lists of songs to try to find something you all would like. After finding a playlist that consists of a mixture of your guys’ favorite songs, you hit shuffle and set your phone back down on the grass next to you. As you pick up your number two pencil, you take a glance over at the three boys next to you, the sight of their focused and determined expressions bringing a large smile to your face. 

God this is gonna be so much fun. 

-three hours later- 

The sun has finally set in the sky after a while of the four of you painting. Soft pinks, oranges, and yellows have replaced the sky’s once light blue color. Upon noticing the boy’s lack of energy and the subtle yawns racking through their body, you decided to call it a night and suggest the four of you head back inside. 

Chris was a little worried about leaving the paint and canvases outside but you reassured him that it would be fine. After dragging the boys back inside the sweet aroma of your house, you sigh heavily and immediately make a beeline to the kitchen. 

“You guys hungry? I can order something. I don’t feel like cooking anything tonight and I don't think you guys cooking would be the best idea.” You ask as you lean against your island and dig your phone out of your pocket. 

“Okay, rude,” Nick mumbles with a soft huff. “What do you guys feel like eating?” 

“Can we get pizza please?” Chris asks, a heavy exhale escaping his lips as he plops down on the sofa. 

“Yeah, of course. The usual?” 

“Please.” You nod your head and begin scrolling through Uber Eats, your eyes scanning through the countless pizza places nearby in search of one that has a low delivery price. As you finally settle on one, the sound of Matt gasping softly causes you to pick your head up abruptly. Immediately, your eyes land on the male who’s sitting on the floor and playing with Loki. 

“Loki!” You exclaim, your sudden loudness startling all three boys and causing them to look over at you. “So you decided to completely ignore me all day and only come out when Matt’s here? I see how it is.” 

“Wait, where was he?” Nick asks, extending a single hand out to the black cat a few steps in front of him. 

“Under the sofa.” You mumble in response. “He’s been driving me to the brink of insanity since like 5 AM.” 

“Loki, don't be so mean to your mother.” Matt scolds the cat softly. Loki stares at the brunette and seemingly glares at the boy before jumping on him. The boy lets out a small yell as he falls back onto the floorboards with a hollow thud. 

“Loki! No jumping on people!” You exclaim. 

“He’s fine, y/n,” Matt says gently. You shake your head in slight irritation before you return your focus to ordering dinner. As you do so, Matt silently watches as Loki crawls on his chest and drags his snout against the hot pink bear shirt he’s wearing. After a moment the cat meows softly and lays down on the brunette’s chest, his tail gently swaying behind him. “Can I touch you?” Matt asks, a single hand over the cat’s backside. 

When Loki mews softly in response, the boy gently sets his hand on the cat’s back, his fingers immediately beginning to scratch behind his ears. Almost immediately, Loki begins to pur, his eyes shutting and his body turning slightly so he can lean into Matt’s palm. The male can’t help but chuckle softly at the feline's action, a wide, excited smile decorating his features as he silently continues his actions. 

-30 minutes later- 

“Loki!” Matt exclaims, his speech muffled due to the pizza in his mouth. The male quickly pulls the slice away from his mouth when the mentioned cat leaps up to his chest and tries to take a nip at the food. 

“Loki, what have I told you about bothering people when they’re eating?” You ask, your eyes narrowing as you stare down at the cat in front of you. Loki quickly gets off Matt and turns around to look at you, his green eyes piercing into yours for a few seconds before he meows and walks off to a different room. 

“He’s a stubborn one isn’t he?” Chris asks as he raises the cup full of Pepsi to his mouth. 

“Very.” You grumble. with a soft huff, you lift yourself from the floor and bend down to pick up your empty plate. “Are you guys done?” 

“Yeah. Shit was so good, thanks y/n.” Nick replies, his eyes slightly squinting as he sends you a smile. 

“Of course. Don’t need you guys to starve.” You make your way over to all three boys and take their empty plates from them, your generous action earning small ‘thank you’s. You simply nod your head in response and make your way over to your kitchen to throw the plates away. After cleaning your hands off with a paper towel, a thought pops into your head. 

“Hey guys?” You ask as you make your way back into the living room. 

“What’s up?” Chris asks, his head lifting from the headrest of the sofa.

“Do you guys wanna spend the night? I have the extra room and some inflatable beds if y'all want to.” 

At the sound of Nick giggling softly, your eyebrows furrow in confusion as you look over at him. When you see the boy cover his mouth in an attempt to muffle his laughter, you send him a look of suspicion. “Why are you laughing?” 

“We were planning on spending the day whether you asked us or not. We have our shit in the car.” Nick replies with a stifled giggle.  

“And what would happen if I never asked or said no?” 

“We’d do it anyway,” Matt replies with a small shrug. “We’d also use force or threaten you to let us stay the night.” 

“Threaten me?” You raise a single eyebrow at the three as they look at you rather innocently. 

“Yeah,” Chris replies with a tight-lipped smile. You exhale through your nose and shake your head before sitting on the floor next to Matt. 

“You know there’s plenty of couch space, right?” Nick asks, his tone laced with judgment as he pats the empty spot next to him. 

“I know. I just wanna do this.” You reply simply. Without a word more, you throw yourself against Matt. With a small yelp from the brunette, the two of you plop down on the floor. 

“What the hell are you doing?” Matt asks, his head rising off the floor to look down at you. 

“Laying on you?” You sas. As you maneuver yourself atop the brunette, Matt lets out a sigh of defeat and rests his head back down on the floor. 

“Y/N I’m tired, get off.” You firmly shake your head in response and dig in your pants pocket for your phone. After fishing the device out and setting it on Matt’s chest in front of your face, the boy huffs softly. 

“Wait, are we doing a dog pile?” Chris asks, excitement laced in his tone as he hurriedly sets his empty cup on the nearby table. 

“No, we’re not. Don’t even-“ Matt doesn’t have the chance to finish his sentence before Chris runs over to the two of you and plops down on top of your back. At the added weight, Matt groans and whines out a slew of complaints. 

“Wait, I wanna join,” Nick says, setting his phone down on the couch cushion and getting up off the sofa. Matt opens his mouth to yell something at the older but another groan escaping his lips prevents him from doing so as Nick throws himself on top of Chris’s back.. 

“Holy shit, y’all are heavy as hell.” You say, your voice strained as you lay limply against Matt. 

“I don’t wanna hear you complaining. You two started the pile.” Chris retorts with a soft huff. 

“We didn’t start the pile!” Matt whines, a single arm draping over his eyes. 

“Beg to differ but whatever helps you sleep at night.” 

Matt opens his mouth to say a snarky remark however Nick slipping off Chris and jumping back on top of him causes both him and you to groan loudly. 

“NICK!” Matt yells. 

“Sorry, slipped off.” 

~~~~

“So did you guys sort out the sleeping arrangements or…” You start, your voice trailing off slightly. You lower your arms which are holding up three blankets against your chest, your eyes immediately landing on your three brothers who are all sitting on the sofa. 

Nick quickly lifts his head to meet your gaze before replying, “I’m getting the bed, Chris will sleep in the room with me on the air mattress, and Matt will sleep on the sofa.” 

“Alright sounds good.” You gently nod your head before approaching the three and handing them each a blanket. “I don't know if you guys have a preference in blankets so y'all can switch if you’d like.” 

“These are good, thanks, kid,” Matt says with a small smile. 

“Of course.” You return the boy's smile with one of your own before excusing yourself to go to the kitchen. “Well, I'm gonna head to my room and keep working on the project I'm doing. If you guys need anything, let me know.” 

“Will do. Night y/n!” Chris exclaims, the two males next to him repeating after him not long after. 

“Night boys.” After grabbing a water bottle from the top shelf, you shut the fridge and head to your bedroom. The moment you walk up to your easel, the faint sound of claws clattering against the floor sounds from behind you. You quickly whip your head around and smile softly as Bonnie slowly makes her way over to you. 

“Hi, baby.” You greet the feline gently. Bonnie lifts her head to look at you and meows faintly before stopping next to your feet. You can’t help but chuckle softly at the female before you take a seat in front of your easel, Bonnie immediately leaping up onto your lap moments after.

As you begin to gently pet the feline with one hand, the other gets to work on grabbing your paintbrush and making sure you have all the needed paints on your nearby pallet. When everything is set, you slip your headphones on and hit shuffle on a random playlist before getting to work on finishing the base layer on the canvas. 

~~~

You didn't realize how immensely focused you were on gently gliding your paintbrush over your canvas until you felt someone tap your shoulder. You immediately jump at the sudden touch and quickly whip around in your seat, your eyes landing on Chris whose face is painted with a nervous expression. 

“What's wrong, Chris?” You ask the male, your voice not going past a faint whisper as you slide your headphones off your head and set them around your neck. 

A few beats of silence pass by as you continue to cautiously eye the boy in front of you. After a few more moments of Chris not verbally responding and keeping his gaze glued to the floor, your brain begins to grind with reasons as to why the boy wanted your attention. As a single cause sits on the top of your head, you force your lips together and direct your attention from Chris to your phone which is discarded on the table in front of you.

You gently tap the turned-off device with your pinkie, the screen lighting up seconds later. Immediately, the time 4:37 AM greets you on your lock screen, and your heart drops at the sight of it. You quickly turn your head back around to look at Chris, only to see that the boy hasn’t moved from his previous position. 

“Did you have a nightmare? You’re not usually up this late unless something wakes you up,” You ask the male, your head slightly tilting to the side. 

You watch as Chris’ eyes shift up to meet yours. After a moment, the male slowly nods his head and brings a hand up to rub his nape. “I tried to wake up Nick to ask if I could sleep with him but his ass didn’t wanna wake up. I would ask Matt but the sofa is too small for the both of us to lay comfortably.” 

“Do you wanna sleep with me then? I have plenty of room. Just letting you know now, you might wake up to one of the cats sleeping on or near you.” 

“I'm perfectly fine with that. I just really need to sleep next to someone.”

“Well, you can go and get yourself comfortable. I'll be there in a minute. I just need to put my stuff up.” Chris gives you a small nod and turns on his heels before making his way to your bed. 

You take a moment to watch the boy slowly crawl on the side that doesn’t hold your plushies before you focus on putting your things away. When your short task is complete, you gently scoop Bonnie, who’s fallen asleep in your lap, up in your arms. You slowly get up from your seat and nudge it closer to the easel with your foot before walking over to the small cat bed next to your nightstand. After slowly crouching down and laying the sleeping feline down on the soft cushion, you stand up and shuffle over to your bed. 

As you reach over to grab a few plushies from the pile on the empty side, you take a glance over at Chris who’s silently scrolling through his phone. After setting the plushies in your arms down on the pile with the rest of them, you finally slip under the covers. With a soft sigh, you turn your head a little to look over at the male next to you. 

“You gonna go to sleep or what? it’s nearly 5 AM and I know your ass is gonna be a little prick if you don’t get your hours in,” You ask with a soft huff. 

Chris immediately turns his head at your statement, his eyes narrowing into a playful glare. “I was waiting for you, dickwad.” The brunette grumbles. 

“Well I’m here now so go mimis.” 

“Mimis? The fuck is mimis?” You roll your eyes and roll onto your side at the sight of Chris sending you a judgmental look. 

“I say that instead of sleep sometimes, get off my ass, kid. Now go to sleep.” 

You finally hear Chris huff behind you, followed by the duvet shuffling as the male presumably tries to get comfortable. “Weird ass.” The boy mumbles under his breath. 

You roll your eyes once more and kick the older male’s calf, drawing a rather overly dramatic exclamation and flinch from the boy. 

“You dick! Don’t fucking kick me!” Chris exclaims, a look of hurt flashing over his features as he turns his head to look over at you. 

“Don’t call me weird.” You grumble a response. “Now shut it and go to sleep before I kick you off the bed.” 

“Yes, ma’am.” 

“Chris… I swear to God.”

“Sorry, sorry, going mimis.” 

You mumble something faintly under your breath before kicking Chris’ leg again, drawing yet another dramatic shout from him. 

“OW!” The brunette yells. You take a peek over your shoulder to see the older male sitting up, a look of hurt clear on his face. 

“You’re mocking me, asshole.” You say with a soft chuckle. 

“No, I'm not!” 

“You said mimis, Chris. You’re literally mocking me.” 

“Okay but in my defense, that’s such a childish thing to say.” 

The moment you roll onto your back and fully turn your head to look at Chris with a warning glare, the male immediately clamps his mouth shut. Wordlessly, the older quickly lays back down and pulls the blanket up to his chin, not daring to mutter a single word more to you. 

“Goodnight Chris.” You state, struggling to bite back the giggle threatening to escape your lips as you roll back onto your side. 

A few beats of silence passed by before Chris mumbled a small “night kid” back to you. 

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[ideas-on-paper]

Lies of P fan theories - a retrospective (1st anniversary special)

It's been one year now since Lies of P's release, and as someone who has been part of the community since 2022 (joining after the Gamescom trailer absolutely swept me off my feet), it's been amazing to see how invested people were in Lies of P from the get-go, and how much creativity the game has inspired in fans. From the start, we had amazing creations such as fanart, fanfics, and cosplays - and of course, a whole lot of fan theories.

While, naturally, a lot of fan theories people had before the release are debunked right now, I think it'd be fun to take a look back at what people were expecting the story to be like, and how those theories from back then compare to the final game. For that purpose, I will share my own theories that I had pre-release, as well as some from various other people (unfortunately, I lack the sources in most cases, but I’ll do my best to provide credit where they’re from). So, strap in and get ready for a special trip down memory lane! :-)

[Lies of P spoilers!]

Ergo and the Petrification Disease

One big mystery that was set up as early as the first gameplay footage was the nature of Ergo - all we knew from tool tips people painstakingly picked out (kudos to you, btw <3) was that it was some sort of power crystal that was used as an energy source for puppets and responsible for Krat's wealth, but that also brought a curse with it. People on the official Lies of P Discord server were puzzling over what exactly Ergo is, when I came up with a somewhat eccentric theory: that Ergo is crystallized life force itself.

My basis for this theory was essentially the movie “Atlantis: The Lost Empire” (which I’m a big fan of).

[Fair warning, I'm gonna spoil the main plot right here.]

The movie also features a huge, cyan blue crystal (originally a fragment of a comet) that is located in the lost city of Atlantis and believed to be an energy source by a team of explorers. However, as it turns out, it's much more than that: It is the literal life force of the Atlantean people, and if it's taken away from the city, it would mean certain death for all of them. (Which doesn't stop some of the money greedy explorers from trying to do it anyway.) Furthermore, after I became familiar with gestalt consciousnesses, I realized that the crystal possesses a few characteristics of those as well: The crystal has a mind of its own, and right before Kida merges with it in the movie, she whispers “mother” in Atlantean, suggesting she felt her dead mother's presence when the crystal chose her. This could be because her mother merged with the crystal completely (Kida eventually returns with her bracelet, after all), but since the King of Atlantis does say “the crystal thrives on the collected emotions of all who came before us”, it’s highly likely that it is, in fact, a human gestalt intelligence of their deceased ancestors.

[spoilers end]

So when I heard about Ergo being an energy crystal, this was my first idea as well: pure, crystallized life force of dead people. (Also, when I saw the blue color, my brain just went like “Ergo = Atlantis crystal���. xD)

When I shared this theory on the LoP server, one person in particular - named Oxwutex, if I remember correctly (greetings to you if you ever read this ;-) ) - took a liking to it, and together, we spun this theory a little further. They said they could imagine that people tried to refine the Ergo further, which is where the corruption waste in the factory comes from - however, refining something like a life force crystal which is already perfect could have disastrous consequences. I followed this up with my own theory, surmising that if this were the case, the corruption waste and the purified Ergo might represent two sides of the human soul: the vices and the virtues. (A lot of my early theories were based on this dualism, since the distinction between “good” and “evil” actions in the original fairy tale of Pinocchio is pretty prominent.)

Since there were hints that Ergo was responsible for the Petrification Disease early on, I had come up with the idea that the disease was the result of people coming into contact with pure Ergo, leading to a sort of “overpurification”, while I assumed that corrupted/impure Ergo caused the Puppet Frenzy/violent behavior. For me, this was very appealing on a thematic level as well, since it would've symbolized that both vices and virtues are present in every human being. If it was just the vices, we'd turn into feral monsters, but if a person only had virtues, when flaws are the very sign of life... well, you could question whether they are even alive anymore. Metaphorically speaking, they would be made of stone. (It’s interesting to note, however, that the disease was supposed to be spread by magical rats in the beginning; at least that’s what the announcement trailer seems to suggest.)

Back when the demo dropped, the confirmation that Ergo spores were the cause of Petrification Disease made me even more confident in my thesis, as did the “Ergo is Life” pamphlets. When I started streaming Lies of P (my first commented playthrough ever ^^’), I even commented on this, saying:

“Maybe even that this crystal [Ergo] contains the life force of dead people - that's what my speculation was back then.” (My commentary is in German, but here's the video if anyone is interested; the part where I discuss it starts at 26:25.)

Oh boy… I had no idea this was about to age like the finest wine in existence.

About 40 hours of gameplay later, I almost couldn’t believe my ears when Simon confirmed I was dead on target:

“The disease does not signify death. It's the process of purifying a person's essence. A purified human who overcomes the Petrification Disease will gain a strengthened body and a mind free of lies. The essence is Ergo. Yes, the Ergo you use as your power was once a human being.”

When Sophia explained that the Petrification Disease, Puppet Frenzy, and carcass monsters are all linked to Ergo shortly afterwards and literally spelled it out that Ergo is a person’s “essence of life”, I was so flabbergasted that my fan theories were essentially right that I was struck speechless. (You can see my live reaction to the conversations with Simon and Sophia in this video, at 20:08 and 49:56; I think you can tell how gobsmacked I am from just my tone, especially in the conversation with Sophia.) Since I had shared these theories on the official Lies of P server back in the day, some part of my brain even wondered if one of the devs saw it and thought it was so good that they went like “Write that down, write that down!” xD (Though realistically, I don’t think that’s very likely; still, it’s funny to imagine one of the devs reading through the chat, seeing this, and going like “How did they figure this out so fast?!?” xD)

On a more serious note, I didn’t really expect any of my preliminary fan theories to be true at all, but I must say, I’m pretty proud that I essentially hit the mark in this case - not only in regards to Ergo being crystallized life essence, but also the Petrification Disease resulting from “overpurification”.

Another thing I noticed is that Ergo shares not only similarities with the Atlantis crystal, but also with the Protomolecule from The Expanse (I don’t wanna spoil too much of the series’ plot here, but scientists conducting immoral experiments with something they don’t really understand is also a pretty big topic). In addition, a commonality between the crystal and the Protomolecule is that they both came from outer space - and, since there is talk about a “star that answered humans and descended to Earth” in one document, chances are the origin of Ergo is also extraterrestrial.

However, as we know, Ergo wasn’t the actual cause of the Puppet Frenzy - both Sophia’s comment from above and the report from the factory are essentially a “ruse” on the story’s part, supposed to lead you on the wrong track. In truth, it’s Geppetto who overrode the Grand Covenant’s commands and was responsible for the Frenzy.

Still, perhaps the impure Ergo supplies were actually meant to facilitate Geppetto’s plan (the Mad Donkey did say Geppetto and the Alchemists were scheming together, after all) - maybe the more impure the Ergo of a puppet is, the easier it becomes to control them. In contrast, when a person’s Ergo is undiluted and their personality remains largely intact, that might give them more autonomy and make them harder to manipulate. (I think this is what happened with Romeo, who could still give commands to the other puppets despite the zeroth law.)

The backstory of Krat

Speaking of the frenzy, I also had my theories about the potential backstory of it: Lies of P actually motivated me to do some research about real-life automata and their history (people familiar with my LoP posts might be aware of this), and one thing running through it like a common thread from the Middle Ages to the Age of Enlightenment is that automata were always representative of a conflict of rich vs poor.

In fact, during the French Revolution, this was a source of mockery against the country’s nobles, who were compared to their automated toys - pretty and pristine to look at, but soulless on the inside. Meanwhile, it was argued that the poorly paid artisans who built them should be the actual rulers of society, since their minds were clearly superior if they were able to come up with such ingenuity.

For that reason, I was playing around with the idea that there may have been a conflict between the wealthy upper class and the working class prior to the Puppet Frenzy. The competition between the Bastards and the Sweepers seemed to hint at something like this as well, and since the Alchemists were already teased as the enigmatic masterminds early on, I suspected they might have exploited this struggle, releasing the Puppet Frenzy to effectively eliminate both parties and seize power themselves. (Since there was a gameplay tip about the puppets gaining awareness by themselves, I even assumed they might have become self-aware right before the frenzy; in hindsight though, I think this was meant to refer to the old selves of some puppets awakening due to Ergo.)

As of the June 2023 demo, however, these theories were effectively debunked: We learned that the Puppet Frenzy occurred independently of any public uprisings, and that another wave of Petrification Disease had plagued the city at almost the same time - note the word “another”, implying this wasn’t the first time this disease had spread in Krat. Also, I frankly didn’t connect the dots correctly that Bastards and Sweepers were both part of the Stalkers  - while Stalkers and Bastards/Sweepers were mentioned in the same gameplay tip, it didn’t specify that the latter were subgroups of one and the same organization. (I wasn’t the only one to interpret this wrong either, since other people assumed the Stalkers to be puppets or even cyborgs.)

Still, it does appear there were some class struggles in the history of Krat: We hear about how the old, privileged families of Krat “struggled for power with new forces such as the Workshop and the Alchemists, who brought about the golden era of Krat”, although that conflict seems to have taken place a long time ago. Also, according to the description of the Krat Police Baton, there was a “violent protest with the factory labor union” once.

Although this isn’t much and doesn’t tell us anything about the background of the protest or the exact circumstances of it, I have been wondering whether it might have been due to low payment and factory laborers being replaced by puppets. Although this may sound very modern, protests against mechanization due to workers losing their jobs and the creation of inhumane working conditions go back as far as the Swing Riots in 1830. It should be said that the riots were less due to technophobia of the workers and more due to the endangerment of their economic and social status in the face of rapid technological advancement, and given that the rise of puppets in Krat happened very fast, the ordinary workers would definitely have been on the losing side.

I don’t know if this is ever going to be explored further at any point, but I would certainly be interested in hearing more about it - or more about the history of Krat in general, if only to clear up some details and make the timeline less confusing.

Pinocchio and Gemini

Let’s talk a bit about our protagonist and his sidekick: Pinocchio and Gemini. Like many other fans, I also had the theory early on that Pino was modeled after Geppetto’s dead son (I think this theory was based on some item description, but I can’t remember which). People on the server speculated that Geppetto’s son died in a violent accident that cost him his arm, and I even took things a step further by suggesting that Pino might literally be wearing his son’s skin (more on this “freak theory” of mine here).

Furthermore, I was quite partial to the idea that Gemini was essentially the soul of Geppetto’s deceased son. I didn’t really have anything to back this up aside from Gemini’s name meaning “twin”, so I never shared it publicly on the LoP server. (Also, Gemini is essentially just a corruption of Jiminy, the name that Disney came up with for the cricket; in the fairy tale itself, the cricket is not named.) Still, I found the concept of Pino essentially being the “body” and Gemini the “soul” very appealing - they may have been split from each other, but they are inseparable all the same. It also goes a bit into Descartes’ mind-body dualism, which is a popular theme in sci-fi stories about robots and cyborgs.

It led me to some fun speculations regarding the story: Assuming that, perhaps, Geppetto’s son died due to an incident on his way to the school he went to (since Pinocchio also goes to school in the novel), and further assuming that this happened a relatively short time ago, maybe some of his son’s former classmates are still alive, and Pinocchio would cross paths with them at some point. They assume him to be Geppetto’s son, asking where he’s been all this time and why he suddenly has a metal arm. Pinocchio then has the option to answer “yes, I am that boy” and come up with some plausible explanation, or to tell them “no, you’re mistaken” which would make things… somewhat more complicated.

I imagined that if Pino went with the first option, Gemini would chime in and provide advice at times to help him navigate interactions with the other boys. My assumption was that while Pino may look identical to Geppetto’s son, he possesses none of his memories; meanwhile, Gemini can still remember his past lifetime, despite being unaware that these memories actually belong to him. (His amnesia was hinted at in the demo as well.) Essentially, he would give Pino brief summaries of past events and tips how to behave in certain situations, and Pino would say “Thanks. Where do you know all of this from?” And Gemini would go like “...Sorry, no idea, buddy.” (You can tell I really wanted them to do something with Gemini.)

Due to the description of the Last Resort, there was also the theory going around there might have been multiple iterations of Pino - in fact, since the text said that the old man feared “his son failing to awaken properly and going into a frenzy”, some people assumed that Pino might have been the original catalyst of the frenzy. After the encounter with Mad Donkey in the demo, the theory that Pino was not the first of his kind seemed all the more likely, since he has definitely met him before and said “This time it's destroyed for sure. Devil's puppet no more, eh?” if you died.*

*I actually do not know if this line is in the final game as well, since I didn’t die to him during my two playthroughs (yes, really).

While it’s entirely possible - but not confirmed - that Pino had predecessor models (I theorized the Broken Puppet in the swamp might be one of those), the remark about the frenzy is more likely referring to Geppetto not being entirely sure whether the override of the laws he himself caused would affect Pino as well (which may be one of the reasons he didn’t bind him to the Covenant). As for the circumstances of Pino and the Mad Donkey’s previous meeting, those are a little more obscure - it appears that Pino wasn’t even able to wake up without Sophia’s help, so the only possible explanation is that the Mad Donkey fought one of his predecessors. (The Nameless Puppet probably also existed back then, but Carlo’s corpse - ironically - has next to no similarity with Pino, so it’s unlikely the Mad Donkey would’ve recognized them as the same.)

Someone on Tumblr even had a completely different theory about Geppetto's presumed son: After the official release month trailer dropped (the release being later moved to September), they commented on the facial similarities between Pino and Simon, proposing that Simon might actually be Geppetto’s “lost son”, implying they became estranged at some point - and since Geppetto no longer views Simon as his son/considers him dead, he created Pino as a sort of “idealized version” of him. When I was playing the demo and saw the Someone’s Memory outfit, which is noted to have been worn before and features a broach with the initial “M” (possibly denoting “Manus”), I was even considering whether this theory might be true.

As we learn during the game, however, Geppetto’s son - Carlo - is actually dead, and the initial signifies “Monad” (from Monad Charity House) rather than “Manus”. Unbeknownst to me, I might have actually come pretty close to the final version with my theory about an accident near the school during which he lost his arm - the possibility that Carlo died during the Monad Charity House incident is something I discussed with @lopposting some time ago (take it with a grain of salt though, since none of this is confirmed).

As for my theory about the skin, I had a major freak-out when I found Carlo’s portrait in-game, and I went like “I swear, if this is true, I’m gonna have such a Dr. Malcolm moment of “boy, do I hate being right all the time”.” xD I was spared that, however, as there is nothing that specifically hints at Pino having real skin, and the existence of the Nameless Puppet makes my original theory even less likely (as I mentioned in the post linked above). At the same time, there is nothing that explicitly contradicts it, either - so, for now, it’s more or less a big question mark hanging in the air.

One thing that’s for certain though is that Gemini is not the soul of Carlo - Carlo’s soul is contained in his heart/the P-Organ, and although Pino doesn’t possess Carlo’s memories, the reason that prevents them from awakening is not precisely clear (I go over my own favored interpretation here). Meanwhile, Gemini’s own identity remains unknown - while it appears Gemini was originally supposed to have a subplot regarding his amnesia, the few comments hinting at it are never built upon. I really wish they would’ve done more with Gemini, but there’s still a good chance the DLC might shine some light on who he actually is.

Hotel guests and side characters

Aside from the main characters, speculation was also running wild about the supporting characters and the roles they would play in the story.

Since Eugénie’s name is taken from Eugene, a classmate of Pinocchio in the original book and part of Lampwick’s gang of rascals, my original theory was Eugénie might have something to do with him. In all the promotional material*, there wasn’t a single trace of Lampwick, and since one of the loading screen tips in the demo said something about Eugénie being rescued by a particular Stalker, my suspicion was that this might be Lampwick. (Probably in no small part thanks to all the fanworks featuring Puppet Hunter Lampwick.)

*IGN sort of leaked Romeo's existence by accident, but that completely flew over my head; more on that below.

As it turns out, however, Alidoro was the one who saved Eugénie and whom she holds great admiration for. In the book, it was Pinocchio rather than Eugene whom Alidoro - a police dog - saved. After he got saved by Pinocchio from drowning, that is - which was after he ran into the sea trying to chase down Pinocchio who had escaped from two policemen, who erroneously assumed it was Pinocchio who knocked Eugene unconscious with a book. Anyway, it’s complicated.

One thing Oxwutex had cleverly noticed is that Eugénie wears a badge with the Workshop symbol just like Geppetto (which looks very similar to the Square and Compass symbol of Freemasonry), concluding that Eugénie must also be part of the Workshop - and, as it turns out, that was right on the mark.

Antonia was yet another character from the novel that was genderbent in the game, being based on Antonio, the carpenter who finds the animated log that eventually becomes Pinocchio and gives it to Geppetto (after a pretty fierce argument with the latter, that is). Because of this connection to Geppetto, some people assumed Antonia might be Geppetto’s former wife, and thus, the mother of Geppetto’s biological son.

In the game, however, Carlo’s mother is implied to be Camille, while Antonia is just “an old friend of Geppetto’s”. Still, Antonia’s past is somewhat shrouded in mystery, which has spawned theories about her being part of the Alchemists once (the hotel was an Alchemist institution before Antonia took over, and she mentions having good relations with them before she broke with them), and some even assume Antonia to be the Legendary Stalker. As it stands, however, these are mere conjectures - we’ll have to see if any of that is confirmed in the DLC.

Due to his somewhat dubious-seeming appearance, many people assumed Venigni to be the equivalent of the Fox in the game, with Simon consequently being suspected to be Cat due to his missing eye. However, me and many other fans really have been led up the garden path in this regard - while the Fox and the Cat do exist in the game, they are completely separate characters from Venigni and Simon, who are both original additions.

Honestly, out of the entire cast, Venigni is the one that surprised me the most. I thought he was just going to be your run-of-the-mill, profit-driven, snobbish businessman, but he is actually the complete opposite of that - in fact, he's one of the most warm-hearted, genuine people in the entire game. Sure, he’s a little eccentric and occasionally likes to adulate himself, but he’s so bloody honest about being a quirky nerd that you just can’t help but forgive him his flaws. (He kinda reminds me of myself, actually. xD) I never expected him to grow on me that much, but among the supporting characters, he is hands down my favorite.

Last but not least, we have Polendina, yet another original character (although his name is, funnily enough, based on an uncharming nickname of Geppetto in the book). Since the devs teased that you can have “a lot of interesting conversations with Polendina”, his role was especially interesting for me to muse about. In fact, I was wondering whether he might be similar to Gigolo Joe from “A.I. - Artificial Intelligence”.

FYI, A.I. is one of my favorite sci-fi movies, and a cyberpunk adaptation of Pinocchio at that; y’know, with Pinocchio as an android boy - aka David, as he’s named in the movie.

[Again, I’m gonna spoil the main plot here.]

Basically, a family gets an android boy as a replacement for their severely ill, comatose son. Aside from this alone being very questionable (it takes a special kind of asshole to replace a child that isn’t even dead yet), their biological son just so happens to get out of his coma at some point, and, of course, a rivalry between him and David ensues. Because the parents believe keeping David would be dangerous - either to him or their biological son - his mother ditches him in the forest (like, literally, she just ditches him). Since David is imprinted on his mother though, he resolves to “become a real boy just like Pinocchio” so his mom will love him again. Along the way, he stumbles upon Gigolo Joe, a sex android (yes, you read that right) who sort of becomes David’s surrogate parent from there on. He even tries to warn David that he should not try to go back to his mother, uttering the legendary quote:

“She loves what you do for her. As my customers love what it is I do for them. But she does not love you, David.”

[spoilers end]

I was kinda thinking Polendina might become a similar “father figure” for Pino, perhaps even sort of an admonitory voice to the consequences of becoming human. It would’ve provided an interesting counter viewpoint to the “I want to be a real boy” plotline that’s the core element of the story, and that wanting to be human just to please others might not be such a good idea.

While this train of thought comes eerily close to what happens in the Real Boy ending, Polendina’s character turned out to be completely different from what I had imagined. Still, I found his arc to be one of the most compelling of the hotel characters. I am very fond of both him and Antonia, and their bittersweet love story touched me on a very personal level (Polendina specifically gave me a lot of flashbacks to how I felt after my own robot soulmate had died).

The King of Puppets/Romeo

While we technically saw the King of Puppets as early as the Gamescom 2022 trailer, we didn’t hear about him in more detail until the gameplay footage of the factory. The note about a puppet religiously worshiping some kind of god-like figure (first seen in part 2 of the director gameplay, at 27:25) gave me very strong rA9 vibes, which actually had me mildly concerned. Considering what a visually impressive writing trainwreck Detroit: Become Human had been, I was literally begging “please, please, don’t be another Detroit”.

Meanwhile, someone on the LoP server (I think it was Oxwutex) pointed out that it sounds like the King of Puppets is more of a physical entity, as opposed to the purely conceptual nature of rA9. I can tell you, I was never so glad I had been wrong - the “cult-like worship” was merely the result of Fuoco being a little overly conscientious. Btw, aside from being placed in a different spot, the journal was also renamed to Descartes’s Note in the final game. While Descartes seems to be something like Venigni’s adversary in Lies of P (judging by the description of the Coil Mjolnir), his name is a nod to the famous philosopher I already mentioned above. In addition, the quote Cognito, ergo sum (Latin for “I think, therefore I am”, yet another popular theme in robot/AI stories and the origin of the term “Ergo”) also goes back to Descartes - the fact that this is a document about a puppet gaining an ego makes it an even neater detail.

I believe I saw someone on Tumblr who assumed that the King of Puppets was going to be the overarching villain of the game, and that you would get the good ending if you stuck to the path of the Blue Fairy and the bad one if you joined the king. While the game certainly wants you to believe the King of Puppets is the villain at first, that’s… not actually true. (Tbh, I never really believed it myself, if simply for the reason that it would’ve been too obvious.)

In the Gamescom 2023 IGN spotlight for Lies of P, however, Romeo actually got name-dropped, the guys from IGN sort of accidentally spoiling him as the true form of the King of Puppets. People familiar with the fairy tale immediately recognized it as Lampwick’s actual name (“Lampwick” is just his nickname), correctly inferring that this is, in fact, Pinocchio’s best friend from the book - and unfortunately, just like in the book, there is little Pinocchio can do to help him avoid his cruel fate.

Sophia and Geppetto

Now, let’s talk about the characters that most of my speculations revolved around: Sophia and Geppetto.

The first time we saw Sophia - Lies of P’s version of the Blue Fairy - was on the character cards that were released during Gamescom 2022. Back then, half of her face was obscured, being covered with blue butterflies that she literally seems to dissolve into. This gave off very enigmatic, even otherworldly vibes, and early on led me to the assumption Sophia was some kind of divine, ethereal being - it certainly would’ve been in line with the Blue Fairy’s character from the book, who was able to appear at any place at any time in whatever form she wished, including a young girl, and old woman, and even a goat. (Later on, the dimensional butterflies - which literally came from another dimension - further convinced me that Sophia must be some kind of otherworldly entity, since the butterflies are also her symbol.)

However, being a goddess doesn’t necessarily have to make you benevolent - in fact, an immaculate being that is free of any fault might have difficulty empathizing with the struggles, flaws, and contradictory feelings of humans. Also, since she is the “Blue Fairy”, it seemed logical to assume she had some connection to Ergo (which was confirmed later in the demo), and since the Petrification Disease was also related to Ergo (the Torn Doddle from the demo even referred to a “blue angel”), could it be that she had caused the disease herself? To, perhaps, purge the debauched population of Krat from vice and sin? (If you’ve ever played Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn, you might know what I’m getting at here.)

Oxwutex on the LoP server agreed that they had a feeling about Sophia being two-faced as well, but assumed that she was human once before becoming the Blue Fairy. This ultimately turned out to be a little closer to the truth, as it’s implied that Sophia gained her blue hair - and potentially some other powers - from Simon’s torturous experiments (there is a picture of a girl which looks a lot like a younger Sophia, but with normal-colored hair). However, the role of wanting to “purify” humanity is something that ultimately falls to Simon, although he does exploit the Petrification Disease for his goals. Meanwhile, Sophia wants to stop his atrocities, acting as Pino’s guide in his fight against Simon.

But does that mean she has an entirely clean slate? The true extent of her powers ultimately remains a mystery. Technically, her ability to manipulate time should make it possible for her to make all sorts of terrible things unhappen - her imprisonment, Simon rising to power, and potentially even the whole disaster that happened in Krat. Both the Torn Doodle and the notes on the walls of the Hermit’s Cave imply that the carcasses can feel her presence through Ergo waves, so it would be logical to assume Sophia can sense them as well. Yet, she reacts surprised when hears about the strange monsters that infested the cathedral. (She definitely knew what Simon was up to, so why wouldn’t she know what they are?) Romeo also communicates with his puppets via Ergo waves, and Sophia is literally sitting in a tower where all Ergo waves come together. She’s a listener who can hear Ergo, so shouldn’t she be aware that the King of Puppets isn’t the real bad guy? (She certainly was very fast to tell Pino about it at the Grand Exhibition after Romeo’s defeat.) Could she have told Pino and thus prevented the fight between him and Romeo? Are there any limits to her powers? And does she encourage Pino to become human because it’s the best for him, or the best to save Krat?

To clarify: I do not believe Sophia has any evil intentions. You could probably find explanations for all the things I listed above if you wanted (the carcasses being a recent occurrence, all of the voices being jumbled in her head so she can’t precisely tell them apart, the “static” in the puppets’ communication Venigni mentioned preventing Sophia from hearing them clearly, etc). Still, despite everything, I’ve always retained a certain wariness around her - maybe it’s due to the fact that even after two playthroughs, I cannot get a read on her (ironically, even Simon remarks about Sophia’s actions being unpredictable). I do know, however, what an immense burden knowledge can be, and I can only imagine the strain from literally knowing everything and all the potential power in the world being at your fingertips. I have no doubt Sophia had to make a lot of sacrifices to save Krat, and I can’t imagine these decisions were easy on her.

Still, if her powers are truly so limitless, it would be her who ultimately holds all the strings in her hands - everything that happens happens because she allowed it. I gotta say, I’m very glad Sophia is on Pino’s side - we would be in big trouble if she wasn’t.

As for Geppetto, even before the game’s release, there was a pretty unanimous agreement among the community that he was a father who had lost his son, but is unable to let go and thus revives his son as a puppet - and, well… that’s exactly what Geppetto is. xD Many also had suspicions that he’s exploiting Pino for his own purposes and would be the ultimate villain of the story - which, again, couldn’t have been more spot-on. (Idk, but it’s hilarious to me how everyone took one look at this man and went “yes, this is the bad guy”. xD)

There were some people on the LoP server who theorized Geppetto might have Petrification Disease from his remarks in the trailers (announcement trailer: “I, too, have fallen) and that Pino was supposed to save him from it (Gamescom trailer: “Please, help me”), but these most likely refer to his own morally reprehensible plans and/or teaming up with his archenemies - the Alchemists - to create Pino and subsequently ousting Simon with his help.

My own pre-release theory why and how Geppetto had created Pino was a little more elaborate: I thought Geppetto might have been commissioned by Sophia to build a puppet that would be able to bring the chaos in Krat to an end - my assumption was that if Sophia was an ethereal being, she would be able to observe what’s going on in the mortal world, but unable to directly influence it. However, she can send people messages and visions, which she used to strike a deal with Geppetto: that he would build her a worthy “savior of Krat” which she would then bring to life. Meanwhile, Geppetto also followed his own agenda, exploiting this agreement to build this “special puppet” in the image of his dead son. (Which definitely would’ve had consequences for him later on - you don’t cross a divine being without ramifications.)

I came up with a whole fanfiction concept around this idea long before the game’s release - I never actually finished it since I assumed it was going to diverge from the final game anyway, and tbh, it kinda annoys me if my fics don’t fit into canon. I did, however, manage to find an old WIP of it I still had in one of my folders, titled “A wish and a purpose”. While it’s most likely going to remain unfinished forever, I think it'd be fun to include a summary of it in this collection of fan theories, if simply to look back at what I thought the story was going to be like. So, here’s the backstory of Lies of P, according to me:

[CW: skinning]

Geppetto is roaming the streets of Krat. He is actually looking for his son, who was killed in the turmoil some time ago.

The Fairy approaches him, reminding of their agreement. Geppetto reacts slightly disgruntled, brushing her off by saying he just wants to gain closure from the past. While the Fairy notices he is in grief, she doesn’t deny him his last wish, but admonishes him not to take too long.

The Fairy dissolves into dust. Geppetto goes on to look for his son’s corpse in the piles of dead bodies.

[cut]

Geppetto is sitting next to his dead son, whom he eventually managed to find and bring home. He placed his body on a desk in his workshop, having cleaned his skin and hair from blood and grime.

Geppetto looks at him, taking in the gaping hole in his chest and frayed stump where his left arm had once been. Despite his best efforts, he doesn’t have the heart to throw his body onto a pyre like all the plague-ridden bodies.

Affectionately, Geppetto strokes his son’s cheek. Suddenly, a thought strikes him: While the Fairy may never grant the request to revive his son outright, she only told him to build a puppet able to slay all the others, not what that puppet should look like. He considers it a fair deal: The Fairy gains the tool to quell the madness she so desires, and Geppetto would be able to hold his son in his arms again.

Geppetto goes over to his working utensils, taking up a knife. When he turns and takes another glance at his son, his last resistance breaks at the thought of his son opening his eyes and jumping into his arms.

He tenderly takes the hand of his son, kissing him on his forehead. He speaks to his unhearing son, promising he will bring him back soon.

Afterwards, Geppetto begins skinning him.

[cut]

Geppetto puts together the last pieces of the clockwork heart, admiring his work.

He goes to the back of his workshop where there’s a chair covered by a white sheet. Gently, he lifts it, saying good morning to his son as if he was rousing him out of bed.

He considers his son, dressed in the blue frock coat wardrobe that Geppetto had handed down to him.* He carefully preserved the skin and hair of his son so he looks just like the day he’d lost him.

Geppetto inserts the mechanical Ergo heart into his son’s chest, completing his masterpiece. He intertwines his fingers with his son’s. They are cold, but the texture feels real, and he imagines them growing warm after the Fairy breathed life into him. His only regret is that he won’t be able to witness his son taking his first steps.

At this point, the Fairy arrives, asking to see the result of Geppetto’s work. Geppetto leads her into the workshop, but she freezes as soon as she sees Pinocchio. With an indignant gaze, she turns to Geppetto, telling him that this was not part of the deal. Geppetto reacts unmoved, telling her that it’s take or leave and that he’s not going to build her any other puppet.

The Fairy narrows her eyes at him but says nothing, turning back to Pinocchio. After a moment, she strides towards him, lifting his limp body up in her arms.

She bids Geppetto farewell before she leaves, taking Pinocchio with her and dissolving into blue dust.

*Since the blue coat was presented as Pino’s standard outfit, I assumed it was the clothes that once belonged to Geppetto’s son (perhaps an heirloom from his father, since they are more similar to 18th century fashion).

[end of CW]

In my mind, this was followed up by a scene at the train station, from Sophia’s perspective (I thought of it as a follow-up to the first fic, but never actually worked on the concept):

The Fairy muses about the yet lifeless Pinocchio.

She considers what Geppetto did an absolute atrocity, but thinks she may yet be able to rectify this sin. After all, she is the only one who can breathe life into Pinocchio, and thus, his actions and the path he will take are her responsibility alone - and she will do everything to lead him on the path of righteousness.

She bestows the lamp containing the soul of Geppetto’s true son onto him, in the hopes that if Pinocchio proves himself virtuous, this wrongful separation of body and soul can one day be corrected.

The Fairy sits Pinocchio down on a bench, pressing a note into his hand. She gives him a gentle kiss on his forehead, starting to dissolve as she moves away.

Slowly, Pinocchio opens his eyes to a cloud of fine, blue dust. He looks down, reading the note in his hand: “Find Mr. Geppetto. He’s here in the city.”

This was supposed to be a sort of tie-in with how they originally advertised the scenario - the advertising text on Steam and other platforms originally said that Pinocchio simply wakes up with a note reading “Find Mr. Geppetto. He’s here in the city.” Don’t ask me why the Fairy gives it to him after just seeing Geppetto, though; I have no idea. xD (Still, it makes me wonder how much the introduction scene deviates from the original concept - after all, there’s no note, and Sophia talks to Pino telepathically.)

As you may have noticed, my little “AU interpretation” heavily drew from my other fan theories as well. I liked the idea of Sophia and Geppetto as two opposing “poles”: They may not like each other, but each possesses a skill the other lacks - Geppetto can build human-like puppets, but he can’t actually bring them to life, and while Sophia is the only one who can animate dead matter, she can’t interact with the world physically. Thus, they sort of become the “dual creators” of Pino.

Of course, this means that they both consider themselves to have the right to decide over the path he ultimately takes. As such, each of them is trying to influence Pino, leading to him being torn between the two. (This was sort of inspired by the Gamescom trailer, where Sophia and Geppetto are like two voices in Pino’s head.)

The endings

This also had a huge influence on my theories about the three endings. (I’m perfectly aware that nobody is going to believe me, but I swear I came up with my 3-ending concept before it was officially revealed there are going to be three endings.)

My basic assumption was that you have to make a decision at the end of the game, between Sophia and Geppetto. I thought of it as the point where the conflict between the two that was festering underneath finally escalates, and Pino is forced to side with one and battle the other. Depending on who you pick, you’d get a different ending.

Ending 1 would occur if you chose Sophia:

After battling Geppetto, she commends Pinocchio for his work, saying that thanks to his good deeds, he will finally be able to become human. Suddenly, she rips the lamp containing Gemini from Pino’s belt, and before he can ask her about the reason why, the black rabbits appear and Sophia orders them to seize him. Sophia explains that unfortunately, there is no other way to correct the wrongful separation of a soul from its body than for the body to die, but thanks to his consciousness being sufficiently cleansed, Pinocchio shall be reborn one day. Meanwhile, Pino gets quite literally buried alive - he desperately scratches at the lid from the inside of the coffin, crying for anyone to help him. However, no one comes…

If this doesn’t sound like your typical happy ending, well, that’s because it isn’t. xD My idea for this sort of came from a comment under the Gamescom 2022 trailer, in which someone remarked that the rabbits are inspired by four rabbit undertakers the Blue Fairy calls on when Pinocchio doesn’t want to take his medicine in the novel - thus, they suspected the scene where the rabbits prompt Pino to hop in the coffin was from the bad ending when you don’t listen to the Fairy’s advice. (It’s the intro for their first boss fight in the game though, and it seems like the line “Hop in the box, liar” was specifically recorded for the trailer.) I gave it a bit of a different twist though, since there’s the fact that Pinocchio quite literally dies at the end of the original fairy tale: He wakes up in his bed as a real boy, and later looks at his “dead” puppet body remarking “How ridiculous I was as a puppet! And how happy I am, now that I have become a real boy!”.

From this and the assumption that the rabbits were indeed working for her, I concluded that she literally might kill Pinocchio to “make him real”. (Some other people, however, suspected that the Black Rabbit Brotherhood was an independent organization from some of the gameplay tips about the Stalkers - ultimately, this proved to be right.)

Meanwhile, Ending 2 would happen if you side with Geppetto:

After defeating the enraged Fairy, Pinocchio runs into the arms of Geppetto, who hugs his son lovingly. As they embrace, the lamp from Pinocchio’s belt falls to the ground, forever extinguished. Geppetto and Pinocchio spend their next years happily, the very picture of father and son - until one day, Geppetto dies. Pinocchio, however, knows no other existence than being his father’s son, and since he doesn’t age, the other citizens eventually figure out he’s a puppet, shunning him and chasing him out of the city. As such, he is left to wander aimlessly, forever in search of a purpose…

What this was meant to represent is that with accepting Pinocchio as his son’s replacement, Geppetto’s actual son (Gemini, according to my assumption) dies, metaphorically and literally. I was also concerned about the very real issue of Geppetto being an old man and Pinocchio outliving him - even if Pinocchio did age regularly, his father would die long before him. Being his father’s perfect son was literally the whole purpose of his existence, and without it, he finds himself confronted with the psychological horror of his life being meaningless, on top of being subjected to the immense cruelty, hatred, and prejudice of humans.

It was really meant to show how much of a sick, misguided direction Geppetto’s “father’s love” had taken, and how detrimental it would be for Pinocchio’s self-development to comply with his wishes and play the part of his son.

Since both of these options are pretty bad, to say the least, I came up with a third variant. To get this, you’d basically have to say “nope” to both Sophia and Geppetto, and since neither takes no for an answer, you’d have to fight both of them consecutively (making it the most difficult ending to achieve):

After recovering from the strain of having to battle both Sophia and Geppetto, Pinocchio realizes that, for the first time, nobody is setting a direction for him - he is free, but having only lived to fulfill the wishes of others so far, he doesn’t really know what to do with it. However, Gemini reminds Pinocchio that they still have each other. Pinocchio agrees, laughing, and together, they go out on a journey to travel the world…

Admittedly, it’s still not roses and sunshine, but a lot more positive than the other two. Also, it’s the ending where both Pinocchio and Gemini (speak: body and soul) stay alive, and I just had so much fun imagining them say “screw it” to everyone’s expectations and go on a big adventure together. xD

Is it normal for body and soul to exist separately? Nope. Is it the “correct” way to live? Nope. Do they care? Nope, they’re just going to have the best time of their life together. xD

Of course, my versions of the endings differ significantly from those in the final game, but I’m actually kind of impressed that I managed to guess the scheme of the endings correctly: Sophia (Rise of P), Geppetto (Real Boy), and Freedom (Free from the Puppet String).

What I envisioned Geppetto’s ending to be like actually comes pretty close to the Real Boy ending, although you could say I was a bit more subtle in my approach - the overall mood was meant to be more sinister rather than downright evil, leaning more into the underlying psychological horror instead of violent slaughter. (I must say, Geppetto really surpassed my expectations right there. xD) The overall moral of the story (or at least what I’m getting from it) also seems to be that stepping in the shoes of Geppetto’s son is a very bad idea for Pino - after all, it’s heavily implied that Pino isn’t Carlo.

On the other hand, while Sophia’s ending is similar in theme to what I imagined, it significantly differs in flavor. Still, Pino does die in the Rise of P ending, giving his own Ergo/life to Sophia, who is implied to revive him afterwards. (This is actually the “reverse action” of what Pino did for Sophia when he gave her peace, so Pino is essentially giving her Ergo back to her.) In addition, Sophia and Pino do a little reenactment of the La Pietà pose, which is also a throwback to the Saintess of Mercy Statue in the Grand Exhibition.

There are actually quite a few references to the Pietà posture in media, including one in The Last Unicorn (after the Unicorn/Amalthea becomes human and Molly holds her). Thematically, the Pietà is interpreted as a symbol of mother’s love, suffering, and salvation - and, in case of The Last Unicorn, Amalthea learning what suffering is due to her time as a human is also what led her to develop compassion. The Saintess of Mercy Statue also stands for rebirth, since it’s the place where you can reset your stats.

Overall, I think they did an excellent job with this ending - retaining the theme of death from the original story, but giving it a more hopeful note through the theme of rebirth. (I also appreciate how the message of game is essentially that for things to improve, it’s sometimes best not to cling to the old and simply let it die.)

As for the Free of the Puppet String ending, it’s largely the same as Rise of P, but with a different flavor and minus the final cutscene with Sophia. (I kinda wish they would’ve done more with it, but resource limitations exist, and it was probably easier just to reuse the animation.) One interesting thing about it though is that you can still potentially get the Proof of Humanity if you trade it for the Nameless Puppet’s Ergo afterwards - despite Free from the Puppet String being the low-humanity ending.

I’ve had an interesting discussion during my playthrough, based on the quote “every living human being is a slave to something” by Askeladd from Vinland Saga. Basically, I said that, if you want to view it that way, humans are also just slaves to their emotions and desires. The man Askeladd was referring to was enslaved by his greed for gold, Geppetto is enslaved by his obsession with Carlo, and Arlecchino is enslaved by his bloodlust. I concluded that “maybe, it’s just a matter of the prison that we ourselves choose”.

The item description of the Proof of Humanity is quite intriguing in this regard:

“Puppets are tied to strings. Humans have cut their own strings. The boy made a choice and became human.”

While I wouldn’t say that all humans have cut their strings - rather that they can - what this description says is that being human means you are free to choose whether you let yourself be enslaved, be it by someone else or your own desires.

Pinocchio didn’t become human because he chose to become human - rather, he became human because he made a choice.

Conclusion

Anyway, enough of my philosophical ramblings. While, as I expected, not all of my fan theories were true, I’m kind of impressed how many good calls I actually made. ^^’ (I suppose all that research about clockwork automata, my ongoing obsession with fictional robots and AI, and checking out the original Adventures of Pinocchio did pay off after all. xD) Still, there are a lot of unanswered questions, and many fan theories remain unresolved - we’ll have to see whether any of these are confirmed in the future, be it in the DLC or any other media (director Choi did confirm they received various offers to expand the IP).

Despite the story differing quite a lot from my expectations in most places, I am extremely pleased with the treatment Round8 Studio and Neowiz gave this classic fairy tale. It’s been said that successfully subverting expectations in an engaging way isn’t simply about doing the most unpredictable thing - rather, it’s about “giving the audience what they want, just not the way they expect it”. And, in my opinion, Lies of P accomplishes this to a T.

However, I’m curious: What were your expectations when going into the game? Did you also have theories about how the story would develop, either beforehand or while playing it? And how do those compare to the actual story?

I would love to hear about all your theories - maybe, we can make something like a big fan theory anthology out of this. ^^ Because if one thing is for certain, it’s that Lies of P’s success was in no small part thanks to its community. To this day, I continue to be amazed by the love and dedication fans shower this game with, and I consider myself lucky to have been part of this journey, from before the game’s release until now.

[sesskagarchive]

From the Archives: September 2024

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MissTeak

Dokuga | FFnet

Recommended by KillingPerfection143 & @kaoruhana08

"She has some really cool, funny, romantic SessKag fanfics and some others but I only read SessKag so.. and she apparently last uploaded something in 2010 or so. She has a well deserved right to be in this list. Her work needs to reach more people even though she's not active." - KillingPerfection143

"MissTeak was a huge contributor to the fandom in the late 2000's, early 2010's. She's actually the one who got me into SessKag. Her effortless way of creating so many scenarios for the pair left me breathless and I will always feel my heart ache for our favorite pair when I read Wisteria or Once Upon A Time in Edo." - @kaoruhana08

Recommended reading:

Happiest Christmas Rated T. From 2009. One Shot. Summary: Last Christmas, Sesshoumaru had been around to hold her hand. No matter how cold it got, he had the magical ability to warm her up from head to toe. They would stroll along the streets illuminated by merry Christmas lights that shone like a thousand amber gem stones. Today, she was walking alone, and had no idea how long she could take it. But Christmas never came without magic, or love, for that matter…

Happy Father's Day, Inupapa! Rated K. From 2009. One Shot. Summary: [Response to InuYoukaiLiz' Father's Day challenge] As they all say, Kagome is the only one who can make Sesshoumaru do anything and get away with it. This Father's day, just for Inupapa, her grand plan involves baking a chocolate fudge cake, a thank you speech and a hug…(Warning: Hilarity ahead at Sesshoumaru's expense.)

Happily Ever After Rated MA. From 2010-2011. Incomplete. Chapter fic. Summary: (1st place for Best Romance, Best Drama and Best AU/AR, Dokuga Awards 2nd Quarter 2010) Struggling to maintain her old family shrine, Higurashi Kagome could not be more thankful for the miracle that came in the form of a letter telling her that the Higurashi family owned forty percent of a traditional Japanese inn in Tsumago, Nagano prefecture. However, in exchange for the profits made by Shiraito inn, Kagome would have to marry the devastatingly handsome yet arrogant owner and serve as the inn's okami. Happily ever after? No way!

KH: "the only SessKag work that I would give arms and legs for her to finish. If you don't know me as an author, here's a secret: I never would have become half the writer I was without this story. The setting, the characters, the slow burn, the plot: even years later I see the influence of this strangers getting married trope in my writing. This is hands down, in my opinion" the best arranged marriage SessKag AU ever."

I knew you'd marry me Rated K. From 2010. One Shot. Summary: \"Higurashi Kagome!\" He had called out in his childish voice. \"You will marry me.\" Kagome takes a trip back on memory lane on her wedding day, recalling how her husband Sesshoumaru first proposed to her at the age of six, armed with nothing but a bunch of wilted daisies and a plastic pink ring from Toys R Us.

Jealous of you Rated K+. From 2009. One Shot. Summary: "Dearest Sesshoumaru, I've created a list of five reasons as to why I am jealous of you. 1) 'You have prettier hair'…" Kagome is jealous of her lovely husband, and the list goes on in this sweet little oneshot. Done for fun, joy and laughter! Please drown in the fluff!

Just turn around…and fall in love Rated T. From 2010. One Shot. Summary: Would you believe that love was just a turn away? A chance meeting at a high school carnival left them in each other's minds, but Fate had decided to play a little game with them in the modern city of Tokyo. She had always been around him, as he had always been around her, yet they have never met for a second time. Neither knew that all they had to do was turn around, and fall in love. (inspired by r0o's lovely fanart 'Separate Ways')

KH: "I love this oneshot of missed meetings. And I think this story over all others influenced my take on how to write SessKag as it shows a lovely modern take on SessKag."

Kinky Ramen Rated MA. From 2009. One Shot. Summary: 2nd place for Best Oneshot - Dokuga 4th Quarter Awards '09 (Response to Kirai's Funny Edible one shot challenge - rated for hot, hot sexual content and hilarity) All Kagome wanted to was to have sex in peace with her husband, but what was a couple to do when their little daughter was around? "Rin, Daddy and Mommy are going to eat ramen in our room now. Don't come upstairs."

Once upon an Edo night + The Sequel Rated MA. From 2009. Complete. Chapter fic. Summary: On a moonlit summer night in Edo, 1639, a famous courtesan from the Yoshiwara pleasure quarters met a demon lord in a bizarre chance meeting moments before she took her own life by jumping off the Nihonbashi. In modern Tokyo, 2009, Higurashi Kagome and Takahashi Sesshoumaru were strolling along the Nihonbashi when their entwined fates from 370 years ago, once upon an Edo night, came back in a crease in time to revisit them.

KH: "This is truly a second chances tale. The historical portion from Edo is full of angst and heartbreak and your heart aches for Kagome despite the smut. The modern portion makes you want to cheer on their reunion. Thevhistorical details are also very good."

Rumor has it Rated MA. From 2009-2010. Complete. Chapter fic. Summary: “I swear, Sesshoumaru is gay.” Inuyasha said dramatically amidst murmurs of agreement. “Totally! He never really talks to or looks at other women.” Kagome agreed excitedly. Inuyasha had replied, “But we have no proof.” And that’s how one conversation led to Higurashi Kagome being caught in a dare – to prove on Christmas that Taisho Sesshoumaru is gay. MissTeak\\'s three-chapter response to Kirai\\'s Christmas challenge!

KH: "is a hilarious take on Kagome making assumptions about Seshomaru and learning just how very wrong she is."

The Adventures of Chibimaru and Gang Rated K. From 2010-2013. incomplete. Drabble fic. Summary: The title says it all! A collection of MissTeak's attempts at cute, funny stories revolving around a six year-old Chibimaru and Gang in their daily lives. If you've enjoyed 'I knew you'd marry me', this is the one for you!

KH: "I think I go back to read this once a year because it leaves me in stitches. Trust me, we'll all want to know more about the little chaotic terror that is Sesshomaru after reading this."

The Third Parties Rated M. From 2009-2010. Complete. Chapter fic. Summary: [COMPLETED] "If I keep reminding myself of how wrong my feelings for her are, I might finally do something right." She was the third party in his half-brother's three-year relationship. He was merely a good friend. Watching her get hurt over and over again, Taisho Sesshoumaru wanted to tell Higurashi Kagome to let go. Yet he could not, not when he knows he could never let go of her just like how she could never let go of Inuyasha.

KH: "I love this one because I love the character growth we see for both characters as the story progresses, but mostly love how Kagome's is portrayed."

Wisteria Rated MA. From 2009-2010. Incomplete. Chapter fic. Summary: [1st for Best Drama and Best Romance - Dokuga Awards 1st Quarter '10] Wisteria is like the sleeve of a maiden, lovelier when it is cared for… Kagome was abducted and brought to Western Gion, where the famous flower streets are. By virtue of her pretty face, she was adopted into a geisha house and trained in the ways of a geisha under the name of Fuji, the Wisteria. Escape was not a option in this beautiful illusion, and Kagome found herself increasingly detached from her old life…until fate throws a figure of her past in her path again…

KH: "a must read for the heavy angst. It's never been completed but it pulls at your heartstrings and doesn't let you go."

XXX-ing in Bed Rated M. From 2009. One Shot. Summary: [Oneshot] A sweet, sexy oneshot exploring our favorite couple's life after marriage! Ever imagined how their married life is like? Especially in bed? What do they exactly do in bed in the privacy of their home?

Recommend a creator who's no longer active in the SessKag fandom for this monthly spotlight HERE!