#haven’t quite figured that out yet
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Unfortunately other human beings can perceive me
#excedrinpm#I’m at a limit rn idk why#maybe something triggered me or some shit but idk what#hmmmmmm#well I’m going to take a shower and go to bed so hopefully things will be normal again soon#about every 2-3 years I have a really big meltdown and like it’s really bad and messy#and I haven’t had one in abt 3 years sooooooooooo#time is ticking!!!!#im kind of kidding but also it’s true#but /: I also don’t want to do that#damn this whole being mentally ill thing is a lot weirder now that I have a boyfriend#like I care about him a lot and I don’t want to upset or hurt him#or make him sad#so like#I feel like im not allowed to do crazy shit#which is a good thing objectively#but sometimes it feels like im a feral dog trapped in a cage#and sometimes talking about it or journaling and being like “I want to do XYZ bad thing’ actually like…#makes it worse?#I don’t know if it makes me more likely to do it or if I just journal about stuff like that because I will do it anyway#not sure which is the chicken and which is the egg on that one#haven’t quite figured that out yet#mmmmmmmmmmmmm#/:
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Honestly what is so fun with watching this cast play as gods is that they are both playing them as how they are described in the lore, but they are also adding their own twists to them and making them more then just gods.
They are making them Characters.
They are making them People.
Taliesin’s Wildmother being jagged and angry, always hungry, representing that force of uncontrolled nature while we normally imagine her as this caring motherly figure (as the name suggests)
Nick’s Dawnfather being this caring figure, giving hope and resources to those struggling, while also having a level of arrogance that we not only saw portrayed by Matt, but also in how the Dawnfather sees the Exandrian’s as children he lead towards ‘A better path.’
Laura’s Matron not only understands life and death and is what you would expect, but she was once mortal. She knows of the threat Aeor poses to them and is not afraid to tell the others that there is no saving it.
Ashley’s Everlight is this goddess of light and deeply cares for the people of Exandria. When she created her avatar she went all in and started a family. She is now so much closer to the Exandrian’s then any of the others, and if any of the gods there are going to keep fighting to keep the people of Aeor alive, it is going to be her.
All of these characters are going to be so interesting to watch, and I am so excited to see what happens!
#I didn’t count the Emissary since they aren’t actually the Lawbearer#Also I haven’t quite figured out who Abubakar’s character is yet (Someone tell me please! I need to know!)#Either way I am so excited for these characters and I am so excited to see how much more grey this story gets!#critical role#critical role spoilers#exu downfall#cr downfall
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Buffy The Vampire Slayer | 2.21
#willow rosenberg#daniel osbourne#buffy the vampire slayer#willow x oz#daniel oz osbourne#woz#btvs#btvsedit#dailybtvs#slayerdaily#*mine#i haven’t quite figured out how to color this show yet#it’s just so BEIGE
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Obsessed with the both of them
I usually have a bi hc for Poison. But I also have multiple versions of every character ever in my brain. It’s great
#bear with me while I get a handle of them#I haven’t quite figured any of them out yet#artie.draws#party poison#jetpoison#jet star#killjoys#danger days#ddttlotfk#the fabulous killjoys#mcr#ttlotfk#starparty
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Thought of the day: Turbo Granny providing free bottom surgery for all the local trans girls!
#turbo granny#dandadan#I haven’t quite figured out her vibes yet but I think she’d do it on purpose#at the very least I choose to believe she says trans rights#if for no other reason than becuase I like trans rights
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drew my favorite silly moment from secret life session 3 ❤️
#secret life spoilers#<<< barely#secret life#ethoslab#smallishbeans#boat boys#THEYRE SOOOOOO SILLY.#also sorry for the boring joe design i haven’t figured him out quite yet#my art
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there’s not enough mp100 horror art.,, i must change this *looks solemnly into the distance like batman*
#i find it incredibly funny how this does not match my last doodle post.#ANYWAY. i am literally always open to horror suggestions#like please tell me to put them in terrible situations#cowardly speaks#i’ve always wanted to make reigen into a pile of flesh but i haven’t yet quite figured out how to execute that
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And re: more socializing: I’ve been… able to verbalize my whole queerness… Multiple times already this semester. I don’t think I ever could have predicted that for myself.
#🌸 minminrambles#In efforts to keep myself from going horrendously sad over lost social connections I will be GOING SILLLY and possibly GOING TO SLEEP#Like I am visibly queer. I’m visibly butch. And yet I haven’t quite verbalized this before in school.#I think I’m going to be more… me.#From telling a professor ‘oh will we be talking about non traditional gender roles in this class? B/c. *gestures at myself.* I’m not exactl#A traditional woman. So I’m interested in that.”#And having an ice breaker activity that asks for a favorite history figure and me saying ‘oh yea Leslie Feinberg’ ‘who?’ ‘O. Ah. Um.’#And The Femme with her ‘butches please interact’ sticker. GAH. I did a silly little point at it.#Being out of the closet is more than just… having pins and badges and such.#It’s standing tall and being able to proclaim myself huh. Like yeah. I’m not a typical woman.#Yeah a big favorite novel of mine is Stone Butch Blues.#Yeah I’m wearing a tie to class and im going to intentionally lower my voice’s pitch and yeah#Scratches head.#Looks at the time. Oh holy moly I should sleep huh.#But Yeagh I’m just here in awe that I am being more out there with my queerness. Who knew this shy butch had it in him!#<- I always SAY she/any pronouns but never go for the ANY part of it. So I will refer to myself by all matters of pronouns.#I can be a he or a she or an it or a they or a xe or whatever else. I am whatever. Truly.#<- I am ‘whatever’ on MY terms. <3#Anyway goodnight tumblr and goodnight whoever reads this
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Wine stains on porcelain
(Alternatively: @katkastrofa and I have created 5 OCs in 3 days and I suffer from chronic “I wanna draw the little guysssssss” disease)
#my art#artists on tumblr#the legend of korra#original characters#I have not figured out a tag system yet so for now this is all they’re getting#their names are liba and abyan and I’m very much obsessed :)#they’re the children of two of our other newest OCs. Himman and Summiya#the latter of whom just happens to be Zaheer’s older sister#but he ran away from home years before these two were born so he most likely isn’t even aware of their existence#I mean. I’m sure he suspects his sisters had children. but that’s the extent of what he knows#anyway#quite a few headcanons came to mind as I was drawing so I’m gonna type them out while I can still function#(haven’t slept for two nights in a row. I’m starting to doubt whether I’m actually alive or not)#Liba is older by about a year but once they grow up a little it’s barely noticeable and people assume they’re twins#over time they stop bothering to correct them because really. they’re so close they might as well be#they were both burn with port wine stain birthmarks on their faces. much to their mother’s dismay#she has a whole perfectionism complex and needed her children to reflect that to maintain the family image#thus they were taught how to hide the marks early on. but the powder makes them constantly sneeze#liba is very self conscious about it bc of what her mother put in her head. Abyan less so bc while he’s expected to be perfect#his future doesn’t depend on his looks. he always tries to comfort his sister whenever she spirals too deep. no matter that she’s older#when no one is around to hear he calls her Lili <3 it annoyed her at first so she dubbed him Yanyan in retaliation#but over time they both grew to love the nicknames and now use them unironically#they’re the ultimate partners in crime. their goal? gaining as much freedom from their mother as possible#and sooner or later they will manage to do so permanently. which will make Summiya fall apart. but that is currently Kat’s domain#speaking of. hi Kat. I know you’ve already seen this in pencil but look! I coloured them!!#the birthmarks were both kinda annoying and rather fun to do. maybe I’ll change them later. I was too tired to look at refs so I improvised#and there’s no detail in clothing since again. 0 energy whatsoever. but once I refine their full body designs I shall go all out#that reminds me I need to go collect my new sketchbook. might do it on the way home from the store#okay I’m getting distracted. is this my very unsubtle way of trying to influence Kat to write that Summiya fic?#maybe. maybe not. you can’t prove anything 😁
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Jackie and Kim!
#yeah Jackie has like the male markings for a rhea she’s transgender it’s fine#and I still haven’t quite figured out witches in this au yet so#soul eater#kim diehl#Jacqueline olantern dupre#soul eater au
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here’s a little purgatory dean love 🩸
#dean winchester#supernatural#my art <3#supernatural dean#supernatural fan art#digital art#purgatory#purgatory dean#still haven’t figured out hands quite yet sorry#dean#my drawing#line drawing#D.W.#fanart#spn fanart#season 7#spnfamily
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Me: *Trying to go about my day like a normal person *
My brain: “What if we made a TADC OC that’s basically a slime monster girl, but she’s based on the kind of toy slime that has a bunch of cutesy objects in it?? And when she was a human she was a highly skilled and respected Intensivist working at an ICU?? And as a doctor, she was known for being gentle and compassionate to all her patients, and she treasured the staff members working under he?? And she saw all her staff as members of her family, and was fiercely protective of them?? But also while she always appeared extremely confident and well put together, deep inside she struggled daily with a massive inferiority complex and imposter syndrome?? Because she never believed she deserved any of the praise she received despite her work, and constantly felt the need to prove herself by going above and beyond in her work?? And all the plays into why she’s a slime girl now, because even though she always appeared as strong and confident in the surface, inside she’s soft and anxious??
And while she doesn’t remember her life prior to entering the Digital World, during times of crisis or when someone’s injured or at high risk of abstracting, suddenly doctor mode activates?? She quite literally pulls herself together and becomes completely solid like plastic, and gives off a strong aura of confidence and authority?? Thoughts, terminology, and emotions that are foreign yet seem SO familiar surge through her, and without really thinking about it she talking and acting just like she did as an ICU doctor; leading her to quickly take control of the situation with firm confidence before gently tending to the injured/abstracting individual. She doesn’t understand how she knows any of what she’s saying as she gently tends to, and or talks the individual back down from the edge, but it feels so natural to her! It’s like she was MADE to do this, and had actually done it many times before despite having no recollection of doing anything like this previously?? And as she slowly helps the individual ground themselves in reality once more, she’s still maintaining a perfect composure during the whole ordeal, not once showing just how afraid she really was and instead just remaining laser focused on helping the “patient” in front of her??
And it’s only when her “patient” has finally stabilized somewhat that she finally notices everyone staring at her in awe, and then she starts barking orders to everyone to get the “patient” back to their room so they can be admitted into the hospital for surveillance, and that she wants a full blood panel and PHQ-9 assessment completed while she fills out an incident report for the hospital’s records. And everyone is so taken aback/still in shock that they just kinda go along with it because she sounds so sure of herself no one knows how to argue otherwise.
It’s only when someone breaks out of their stupor enough to ask her how she did all that/what the heck happened that she snaps out of it, and she softens into her goopy self again as she tries to clumsily explain she has no clue what happened but was just overwhelmed by these sudden thoughts and emotions, and despite not knowing where any of it was coming from it felt like she just instinctively knew what to do and how to do it.
Someone points out to her that she looked and sounded just like a doctor back there, and that maybe that’s who she was prior to entering the Digital Circus. She doesn’t believe it, insisting that there’s no way someone like her could be a doctor, but everyone insists that she absolutely could be and that what she did was incredible?? And now she’s kinda the unofficial doctor of the circus despite still not believing she was, or could ever be, a doctor??”
Me: *Sitting on the couch letting my brain hyperfixate* 👁️👄👁️
#this…this ended up being WAY longer than i intended#but my brain has literally been CONSUMED by this idea#that trope of ‘amnesiac somehow instinctively knows how to do the the thing because they did it previously’ is a fav of mine#she might not remember her old life but the caregiver instincts and knowledge is still very much ingrained into her#and it comes out full force when someone is in need of medical attention#she orders caine to go prepare a hospital bed and he’s like ‘yes ma’am!’ before taking off to do that#he makes it 2/3s down the hall before realizing what just happened and poofing back#in his defense she was so confident and authoritative his coding went ‘ah a doctor. you should always listen to medical professional.’#shitpost#tadc#long post#the amazing digital circus#tadc oc#haven’t quite figured out a name for her yet#but i’m tryna name her in a way that would allow the nickname ‘squish’ to be acceptable#because squish as a nickname for a slime lady makes me laugh
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WHO SAID THAT
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Hi, I'm a fan of the incredible au and I have a question. Since Malon can talk to animals, does she have a special bond with her kids who can turn into animals? Like sometimes she just brushes Twilight's fur when he's in wolf form and he tells her all about his day. And one day he stops because that's for babies, but he comes back to it once more when Midna breaks his heart? Sorry just spitballing ideas here.
For sure! With Twilight especially since he can’t talk as a wolf (Legend for some reason can talk as a bunny, none of them are sure how that happened), Malon is really the only one who can understand him (...and Legend when he’s a bunny XD).
I love the idea of Malon brushing out his fur and listening to his day when he’s smaller, and then Twilight deciding its sort of babyish so he stops... but when he’s upset he comes back to it. If he’s having a particularly bad day, or he’s got a headache from his enhanced hearing... or had his heart broken, he goes to Malon and they just sit together a while, sometimes talking, sometimes just sitting.
#haven’t decided quite how Midna ‘leaves’ yet#it’s on my list of things to figure out XD#incredibles au#answers from the floor#jackel gull
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2024 reads / storygraph
Welcome, Caller
a cute small town m/m romance
a 20-something trans man whose routine and comfortable life with his friends starts getting disrupted when a guy he had a vague rivalry with in uni keeps running into him
he finds some stability by regularly calling in to a late-night radio show, which becomes a strangely comforting relationship, despite the anonymity
explores mental health (adhd, autism) & friendship
#welcome caller#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#I thought this was okay! a sweet romance and exploration of mental health and friendship#It does feel quite young for a book about characters in their 20s; the plot and writing feels very similar to a lot of YA contemporaries.#But also I get that being queer/trans/adhd and having a unsupportive parent can mean people experience#teen narrative kind of things when they’re in their 20s. etc#it’s pretty cheesy; the plot is very transparent (and at times a little frustrating that They Haven’t Realised Yet)#and i feel like the not telling him at the end was a bit too drawn out (i get bad mental health exacerbates that but like…..)#but if you’re looking for a mostly-cute low stakes neuroatypical romance maybe check it out idk#also: ace lesbian side character; nice surprise for me! (just mentioned once but she’s his best friend)#ohhh the experience of being a picky eater and figuring out what a normal amount of things to remove from your burger order is#and which ones you just pick out yourself after. yeah i relate to that one#as a side note the MC looks asian to me on the cover.....? he's white
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my shelves are looking so so nice lately 🥰
#please ignore that my fjord statue is missing the star razor it broke off when I was unpacking him and I haven’t fixed it yet 😭#also just cut off the bits of these very tall shelves that I’m not happy with rn lmao#most of my books are on other shelves so the ones here are mostly cause they look nice/complete a display LOL#still have quite a few collectibles to figure out a place for unfortunately#personal
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