#have i gone mad
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~*~ Love Your Own Darkness ~*~
#we are all mad here #alice in wonderland #alice through the looking glass #wonderland #stay mad #my reality
#we are all mad here#weareallmadhere#alice in wonderland#alice through the looking glass#wonderland#stay mad#my reality#madhatter#i found myself in wonderland#light or dark#darkness#darkmadhatter#have i gone mad#take me to wonderland#so what if i'm crazy#ill tell you a secret#love the darkness
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like idk what it is but im kinda serving some ghostly cunt. its giving unfinished business. do you guys see it
i look really cute rn in like ghoul way. i look like a really cute ghoul. im really cure but i also look like i died at least a day and a half ago
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you dream of devouring your friends whole
#the 'it' and 'that' sif is referring to is the act 3 loop hangout but i enjoy being vague in dialogue it feels natural. tee hee.#serious time means everyone gets noses btw. sorry about the slow metamorphasis back into my usual style from my mimicry#in stars and time#isat#isat spoilers#isat loop#isat act 5 spoilers#isat act 6 spoilers#isat siffrin#in stars and time fanart#isat fanart#sifloop#YES IM TAGGING THE SHIP. THUMBS UP. READ INTO THAT HOW YOU WILL BECAUSE IT WAS ON MY MIND WHEN DRAWING IT AT THE LEAST#aaaaaanyway. my personal reading of loop is. how do you say... flowey-esque. to invoke a fellow antagonistic timelooper. since imo#they do seem even fuuurther gone than sasasap sif was when we saw them. and BOY DOES LATEGAME ISAT SIF HAVE SOME INTRUSTIVE THOUGHTS#so uh. who's to say what happened in there. since we know start again isnt quite congruent as loop never beat the king.#i wouldn't blame them for going maybe a little mad. just a lil#it is important to me that loop is. perhaps a bit haunted. AND THAT THEY GET THROUGH IT!!! but they are haunted#lucabyteart#anyway uhhh. probably should put a cw for implied cannibalism??#cannibalism mention
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While appearing the most absurd to modern eyes, Cressida Copwer's hairstyles are based on styles less than a decade ahead in the Bridgerton timeline. The topknot had become a highly fashionable feature in women's hairstyles by the 1810s and continued to get taller during the second half of the decade. Simple designs gave way to complicated braids, ribbons, fabrics, flowers, feathers and bejeweled coiffures. By the first half of the 1830s the topknot was at its ornate pinnacle with large, high-flying flat bows and loops of hair that we see used on Cressida. Grace Gorman one of the wig artists confirmed the historical inspiration on Instagram. (click on images to see source info!)
#bridgerton#bridgertonedit#cressida cowper#perioddramaedit#perioddramasource#perioddramagif#useralison#userhann#userrin#userrishh#usershreyu#dailybridgerton#*#tuserlana#bridgertonblr#tvgifs#tvgif#netflixedit#userstream#tvfilmsource#if i took any longer finding sources i'd have gone mad#finding anything sourced when you want it is a biiiitch#500
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IS THAT ELVIS PRESL- Oh wait, no, it's Wally Darling!
#I have officially gone mad#I wish I was joking#wally darling#wally welcome home#welcome home#welcome home fanart#welcome home puppet show#welcome home arg#my art
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I love your content so far from what I read and I had a crack I did just hit me
After a while the bat family finally decides to get rid of Ra al Ghul like take him down and take his position from him as the leader of the League of assassins to dismantle it
Ra al Ghul never warned anyone if they want to actually become like the main watcher over the Lazarus pits but they have to go to a 2000 door haunted house run by the ghost King who is 15 years old
So I'll be entire bat family is practically being put through spooky's haunted house 1000 doors except it's Phantom haunted house 2000 doors
Danny believes that anyone that wants the Lazarus pits is undirectly like a bad person so he kind of uses it to a trauma dump on people and be mentally tortured these people so they drop out of taking it
He's getting help from Ghost like Ember Techn, Poindexter, Wulf even cujo
Like they put Ra al Ghul through hell and now they're going to put the bat family to that because they have no idea or not if they're good people
So it's just Danny traumatizing them by making with the horrors and some of the deaths of the ghost the last shocker is at the last door they have to relive Danny's death then Danny will come out and hand them a key and then proceed to give them the whole feel about being the new owners of Lazarus pits
I just enjoy the idea of Danny and the ghost being terrifying
I don't think Danny knows enough ghosts to pull off 2000 doors but he does know Ghost Writer. As well as several ghosts who could make them relive each other's worst/most traumatic moments. Ras probably went alone when he did his trial. But if the whole batfam is going in? So much ammo.
It could start out simple. Lure them into a sense of ease.
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"Huh. When the scary voice said we would be facing trials to prove our worth. I didn't expect sentient, cuddly blobs." Duke said petting one of the blobs that was chirping happily. Not noticing as his fellow vigilantes and friends also began to cuddle the blobs.
It takes them three hours before they realize that they've lost time and begin to fight the calming effect that the blobs exude and head towards the door on the other side of the room.
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And maybe embarrassing.
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"Once upon a time."
"WHY THE FUCK AM I WEARING TIGHTS!"
"I don't know. I think they look good."
"Shut up dickface."
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Even a bit annoying at times.
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"I AM THE BOX GHOST!"
"WTF! This guy is more annoying than Condiment King!"
"At least he isn't dumping ketchup on us!"
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The first few hundred doors could even be called easy for people like the bats.
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"Quit hitting yourself. Quit hitting yourself." Jason said after he ripped off the robot's arm and started to use it to beat the robot.
"Hay. Don't you think you're going too far Hood?"
"Stop your incelence! For I. Skulker. The greatest hunter ever. Shall be the one to skin you alive and use your pelts as a rug in my den!"
"You were saying Dickolase?"
"Give me the other arm. I want to break this pinata open."
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But that ease does not last long. Soon they are faced with the suffering of others.
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"What was that. What was that!" Steph shouted as she clung to Tim. Trembling from the adrenalin rush.
"I think. I think we just died? In a motorcycle crash? Did we just get hit by a CAR while on a MOTORCYCLE?!"
"That motorcycle crash was quick compared to how I died! So shut the fuck up!" Jason yelled before stomping toward the next door. And if his hand was shaking as he reached for the doorknob? No, they weren't
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And even faced with the consequences of their failures. Failures that nearly tore them apart. Failures that could still tear them apart.
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"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't know."
"Shut up old man! You never asked! You weren't there! You're Never There!"
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And temptations.
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Dick looked around as his family piled into the living room of the manor. Everyone was laughing at something Duke said. Jason laughed the loudest as he slung his arm over Tim's shoulder for support. (Wrong, this is wrong, why is this wrong?)
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And nightmares.
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"Give them back! GIVE THEM BACK!" Bruce screamed to the sky as he clutched his kids as close to him as he could. Falling into despair as their bodies, their corpses, grew colder. The echos of their own cries of pain and anguish ringing in his ears.
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They still manage to fight through the physical and psychological horror. Even when they are pushed to experience torture that not even their most vial villain would do to them.
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"I'm alive! I'm me! Mom! Dad! Please! Please!" "Shut up you freak! Honey, get the muzzle. I don't want to hear its lies anymore." The woman, the monster, in the teal hazmat suit said as she pulled out their intestine and hung it on a rack for further examination.
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They persevered. And when they leave the last door behind? And are faced with a young boy, no older than 14, who looks like an amalgamation of all of the Robins when they were that age?
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Danny watched as the would-be-owner of the Lazarus Pits stumbled through the door. Only for an entire group of Kevlar waring fruitloops to fall out of the door.
"So you are the fools who think to control the blood of King Lazarus. So far you have seen many facets of the horrors that can come from..." Danny started his monologue before he was interrupted by the one wearing a cloak reminiscent of a bat falling to his knees.
"Please. Please say we don't have to fight you. I can't. I can't." He said before breaking down in tears as several others joined him in his cry fest.
"Shit." Danny said as he looked at the people before him. Panicking over what he was supposed to do.
#dpxdc#dc x dp#dc x dp crossover#dp x dc crossover#danny phantom#batfamily#phycological horror#The ghosts may have gone a little overboard#Just a little bit#Hay Jazz?#Don't get mad okay?#But I think I broke them
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No, Zuko did not lead Katara down a "Dark Path" in The Southern Raiders
Watching Southern Raiders again, and it's bizarre to me that people read that episode as, "Zuko leading Katara down a dark path." Zuko just wants her forgiveness. He fucked up with her severely and to a level that's different from the others. She feels betrayed by him--she was betrayed by him. She trusted him and he all but spat that back in her face so yeah, she's mad. Is it selfish using her desire for justice, closure, maybe revenge to get her to stop being mad at him? Idk perhaps, if you read it that way.
But the way I read it, I read it as him using his resources to give her what she wants most, and that's her mother's killer. Since he was the face of the enemy, since he lost her trust, let him earn that trust back by taking her to the real face of her enemy.
It's the literal least he can do.
Then he steps back. Zuko let's Katara lead the mission, let's her defend herself against Aang and sadly Sokka too while only playing support. Zuko got a comment in there or two, but for the most part it's Katara doing all the talking.
Also something important people forget is that, neither Katara nor Zuko brought up revenge, that was all Aang accusing them(meant to type her, but saying them fits more) of seeking revenge. Maybe that was her unconscious motivation, but Aang was the one who brought it to the forefront of their minds. Zuko states that this is about Justice and closure, Aang was the one who made this about revenge.
After all that back and forth is said and done, Zuko is largely quiet the rest of the episode save for like 3 lines, none of them involving him telling Katara what to do or what she should do.
Katara leads the mission, Katara makes the choice to bloodbend even when Zuko was already facing the SR general on the boat. He didn't tell her to do that, he wasn't in a pinch so she would've needed to do that, hell she didn't even have to do any of that at all considering there was still water on the ground.
These were all Katara's decisions, all Zuko did was stand by her side.
This isn't me trying to say that Katara's making bad decisions. Far from it actually, I heavily agree with Katara's decisions. This isn't even a "supporting woman's wrongs" scenario either. Katara's completely in the right in my mind.
This is a mission involving finding the man who killed her mother. Not kidnapped like Appa (comparison courtesy of Aang), not whatever the hell the comics are doing with Ursa, murdered. Kya is never coming back and it's because of Yon Ra. Little Katara had to see her mother's dead body after the act was done and has to live with the pain and guilt of it all knowing Kya died to protect her. She's traumatized, she's hurt, so she's very much justified in wanting revenge and it's disquieting how so many people make this about Zuko leading her down some dark path for saying "I want to find the man who killed my mother and took her away from me." Bryke included.
Again, Zuko stands back, adds support in the fight when needed, but ultimately is there as her backup and sources.
And yet, people see all of this as Zuko leading her down a dark path. Because he dared to stand back and not talk Katara down from wanting to merc the man who took her mother away from her. What a villain, she said sarcastically.
Realistically, why would he stop her?
If anything, the fact that Zuko was the only one in her corner for this says a lot because of everyone there, he gets it. Sokka should've gotten it too, but that's a separate point for separate post.
He too lost his mother to the Fire Nation. Whether she's dead or missing, the Fire Nation and, namely his Father to put a face to it, took his mother away from him. He lost her and he believed that she was never coming back. Katara and Zuko are the same in that regard. Something he verbally empathizes with her in the Crossroads of Destiny episode.
He knows she needs this because he's been there, is there, and very much wants to have done that. If facing the Fire Lord wasnt Aang's destiny (and this wasn't a kids show, along with other in meta perspective) it doesn't feel to far to say Zuko probably would've killed Ozai.
Revenge for his mother is a side goal, but it's out of reach as of this moment. He has no information on what happened to her or where she is, so he can't do a thing. He sees Katara, someone who badly wants to regain trust with, with a similar goal and mindset and he actually has the means of helping her. Of course he takes it, but this is her mission, not his. He just provides the information and helps her getting there. That's all, everything after the fact comes down to Katara's choices.
When the moment of revenge happens and Katara decides to not kill him, does Zuko say anything? Does he asks her "what are you doing? He's right there, get revenge!" No. He doesn't say anything. He lets her leave, stares down Yon Ra for a second and follows after her in silence. You cant apply headcannon like "maybe he tried to convince her after the fact," because that can easily be countered with the head canon of him comforting her telling her she did the right thing. Going soley off what we saw in canon, on screen, Zuko watches Katara spare him from skewering the man with ice.
He does have a shocked expression in the background but that can either be read as "wow she didn't do it," or "holy shit she probably could've killed me 10 times over." Again, nothing verbal from him, only expressions, so it's hard to say firmly what he's thinking.
I got away from my main point for a second, but I'm coming back to it to say, none of this is Zuko's doing. Zuko didn't lead Katara down any path, he didn't encourage her to enact a bloody revenge, what Katara does was all her own actions, all he did was point in the right direction. Kinda shit how by making it seem like Zuko's manipulating her, it takes away from Katara's agency in the situation. She made her decisions and no man influenced her.
The only who actively tried to was her brother and Aang into forgiving their mother's murderer for some insane reason that I still can't fathom. Maybe from doing something she'd regret, possibly, but the in canon reason we get is, "don't do it. It's a dark path, you should forgive him for your own sake. Insert the Appa comparison" I bring that up again, because Appa was kidnapped, and then found again and they were all reunited. Yet Aang compared that to Kya being murdered and left for her daughter and husband to find. There's a stark difference.
Aang's pain in that regard is understandable and dare I say more supported by the fandom and show, while Katara is pratically being told by everyone save for Zuko to sit down and forgive for some inane reason that rings hollow, feels insensitive at the absolute best and takes away her agency by turning it all on Zuko as him making her choices for her.
It's shit, and an absolute misread of what the episode showed us, something Bryke somehow missed too.
I'm gonna conclude this with a quick summary of the end of the episode. Katara doesn't forgive Yon Ra, yet spares his life because he's just pathetic. Aang's weirdly giddy telling her that he's glad she forgave Yon Ra, and Katara having to shut that shit down and tell him that no, she didn't forgive her mother's killer, she never will, and she's conflicted on letting him live. Then Katara gets a soft look and smile for the first time in a good long while in the episode as she tells Zuko that she does forgive him. We get a Zutara hug (iconic) and the episode ends on a happy-ish, bittersweet note for her. Zuko does tell Aang that he's right and violence isn't what she needed (an admittedly weird line considering seconds before she just said she doesn't know if she was too weak to kill him or too strong too, implying she probably would've gone through with killing him, but whatever) but that's when Katara is out of earshot.
Zuko didn't lead her down any dark path, he left himself be lead by her and was willing to let it happen. It being whatever Katara's decision was going to be. Good, bad, middle, whatever would have happened would have all been Katara's decision and her agency shouldn't be ignored because of a bad-take misread of a pretty clear cut episode with very little ambiguity.
#pro Katara#Katara#Zutara#atla#adjacent Zutara adjacent.#first and formost this is about Katara's agency and how people like to just absolve that#whether she should've killed him or not is a character writing choice tbh and I'm not mad she didn't#me personally I would've done it but hey that's my perspective#many others have made better points about how Aang was awful#awful to her anyways#the Appa comparison was wild#he mentions his people too but he fully went avatar state when he saw Monk Gyatso's body but hey glass houses#ya think he's atleast sympathize with her but no he went fully condescending with her#(also he killed a bug and snapped at people when Appa as gone he should get it. and yet)#sheepses
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Luffy Week Day 6- Sun!
#didn't mean this to be so rainbow but Luffy says gay rights hell yeah#luffy#monkey d. luffy#luffy week#luffy week 2024#my art#one piece#one piece fanart#I learned how to use masking fluid and have gone mad with power ahahahaha
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#I was gone for 4 months and all I got for yall is this#homestuck#dave strider#dirk strider#hs#dave hs#dirk hs#homestuck art#my art#my comics#frogsinajar#it was also everyones birthday#but couldnt get a piece done in time#university kicked my ass dawg#but at least im done with the semester#also give me a ring if u want a tag added to this#I have no idea how people will react to the phrase mad monks pickled wang#but im living my truth#also also I think at least three museums claim to have this item#but none of them has proof of having the real one
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good morning i put an additional shot of delulu in my coffee today
#narureno#narumi gen#ichikawa reno#kn8#my art#vice captain reno my beloved#he's not making narumi dino nuggies for dinner if he doesn't do his paperwork#i have developed such a soft spot for reno dyeing his hair two tone to fit in with the rest of the division#this thought has only been placed in my head a few days ago and i've gone absolutely mad over it#DOESN'T HE LOOK SO CUTE#i need to go do style study today i dont know what i'm doing with art anymore ksjdhfs#but like ... vice captain reno ...#hope his friends always call him vice captain ichikawa to tease him until he makes them stop skdjfhs#because it's weird! he's just reno!#AUGH
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“KARA!” Lena screamed. I killed her, Lena grieved.
She didn’t have time to linger as Eve attacked her again, Lena throwing one last punch before she found herself scrambling out of her jet. The explosion killed her, Lena’s mind shouted, thrashing in agony, a litany of damnation that she should never have brought Kara to Kaznia in the first place. It’s all my fault.
But to her astonishment, in the dark, a figure shifted ahead - blonde and burning and bright, and Lena thought for half a second to run back for the fire extinguisher, that Kara might be saved.
But as the figure turned, somehow unaffected by the flames that adorned her like a god, Lena halted. Kara looked concerned, confused. But she didn’t look injured.
Lena’s eyes drifted lower, to the bright S now etched on Kara’s chest, solid blue emerging amidst her burnt clothing. “Kara…”
“Lena,” Kara breathed, reluctance written on her face.
Lena hesitated a moment longer, before taking step after careful step, approaching the reporter as the embers continued to burn across her body. Lena’s hand drifted to the top of the suit’s crest, just below Kara’s neck, where yellow met red. Oh.
It was too much - the whiplash of the explosion, thinking that Lena had carelessly killed her best friend, to realizing that the reporter had once thrown that’s not a great question for a Luthor to ask someone in my family back in her face.
Kara Danvers was her best friend. Did she ever really exist?
“Lena…” Kara whispered again.
Lena dropped her hand, her eyes raised to Kara’s, looking her over again. “Don’t,” she said. Without another word, Lena turned on her heel, and went back to her jet.
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The flight back from Kaznia was longer alone.
Plenty of time for Lena to fume and grieve, for her to rage internally at weathering yet another deceit. Kara Danvers - or whatever the hell she was really called - had used her, betrayed her, spied on her.
Somewhere in the back of Lena’s mind, there was a different acknowledgment - that her glide ratio in her custom-designed jet was good, but not good enough to reach the Kaznian runway when the engines had failed. That her assumption at the time that mountain updrafts had saved her ran contrary to the now-more-obvious explanation - that the kryptonian had saved her from aviation incidents three times now.
Lena looked out the side of the window, where dawn was slowly rising. She desperately needed sleep, but was too wired from watching her best friend be blown up - and then revealed to be a traitor - and sleep was just… not going to happen.
Lena could swear that she was seeing glints of red and blue, just behind her plane, a kryptonian possibly trying to stay out of sight while still being protective. It was infuriating.
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It’s not Kara, Lena’s mind begged, trying to convince herself that the dead kryptonian was the clone she had learned about in Kaznia. It can’t be Kara.
It was with overwhelming horror that Lena watched the footage of Kaznia’s failed invasion, her brother parading around a dead kryptonian in his lexosuit arms, the supposed traitor Supergirl.
He was a hero. For killing her. It can't be Kara. It can’t it can’t it can’t-
Trying to still her trembling fingers, Lena picked up her phone, trying to figure out what to text, what to say, anything to get a response from the kryptonian that she had shut out. Operating out of instinct more than logic, she pressed Kara’s name to start a call instead, holding it up to her ear, her stomach twisting with nausea.
But luckily, it only took one ring before Lena heard a familiar voice on the other end. “Lena,” Kara said softly
Lena pulled the phone away, and hung up.
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There was no other choice in her mind. Not when Lex had regained legitimacy in the eyes of the country by “saving” it from Supergirl’s attack. Not when Lex sought to commit a secret genocide to solve the energy crisis and be named a hero. Not when Lena was the only person who would know where Lex would go.
Not when all Lena could see was Lex cradling Red Daughter in his arms.
The image was burned into her mind, and all Lena knew was that Kara was next - Lex would not rest until every kryptonian was gone. And Kara would be too kind and noble to seek anything but legal justice. But that wasn’t Lena - it wasn’t Lena when she decided to kill Morgan Edge, it wasn’t Lena when she decided to kidnap her mother from prison and poison her, it wasn’t Lena when she tucked her gun in her belt that morning.
A single bullet to the head, and Lex was gone.
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Kara’s door opened just a few seconds before Lena reached it. Lena supposed Kara could hear her down the hall.
Lena ignored the shock and concern on Kara’s face as she stepped inside, making her way to Kara’s window as Kara closed the door. Truth was, she still couldn’t face Kara at all.
“I’m sorry, Lena,” Kara started. “I tried to save-”
“Don’t,” Lena said.
Kara grew quiet, flanking Lena’s side, joining her as Lena stared out onto the streets below. Lena shifted. “I thought she was you,” Lena said. “When Lex killed her, I thought she was you.”
She could feel Kara shrink, uncertain of what to say, of how to move forward. And maybe Lena didn’t know either. But she could try. If… “Is Kara real?” Lena asked, her voice cracking. “Or just a mask?”
“I’m real,” Kara whispered, prompting Lena to finally turn. And Lena couldn’t help herself, seeking the warmth of Kara’s arms, the kryptonian all too happy to wrap Lena in a tight hug as Lena stepped into it. “I… sometimes I feel more real with you than anyone else.”
Lena swallowed harshly, burying her face into Kara’s shoulder, holding back a tremble. “I want to believe you.”
“I’ll spend a lifetime trying to prove it,” Kara whispered. “If you’ll let me.”
Lena took a slow, trembling breath. “Okay.”
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Idea taken from a tweet I saw floating around. If you're interested in a longer season 4 reveal, I also wrote No One and Nothing.
#supercorp#supercorp ficlet#mel writes ficlets#fazedlight#ever since I learned to make gifs I have gone mad with power
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Prompt 86
Let it be said that someone breaking into Arkham Asylum was not something anyone was expecting. And let it be said that if one was to ever try it, they all- guards, residents, and doctors alike- would think they would be breaking in to break someone out.
They are not in fact, expecting a child to be running through the halls giggling with everyone failing in catching him. Someone catch the child before he gets hurt or somehow makes it to the isolation ward! The joker is in there!
Danny is honestly having fun. Ms. Arkham- Gotham’s own Gatekeeper and daughter- is really fun! Sure he’d rather she not view the people within her walls as dolls and playthings, but he supposes she’s not exactly harming anyone. And honestly she could hold on tighter to a few of them to prevent them from escaping in his opinion.
But he’s here to spend time with his new ghostly Aunt, not judge her, so he’s going to get the whole tour! Secret tunnels you say? Oh, a graveyard, inside your walls? That’s amazing! Isolation ward? Ah, where the naughty dolls go, makes sense!
Well of course he wants to see it, lead the way!
#dcxdp#dpxdc#prompts#arkham asylum#danny fenton#is he a teen or smol#who knows#Danny is Amity's Gatekeeper#Arkham has had at least 3 portals open in its walls#So she's Gotham's#Gone a little mad but that's fine#Danny is happy to have a teacher on how to be a gatekeeper#Amity is holding onto that portal until he's no longer baby#Then he IS the portal#or at least part of it#Danny: Wow ms you have a lot of liminals here#Arkham: Yeah they're safe here because no one is getting past me :) Except for J#He's fun to play with but I don't like him otherwise#Meanwhile the Arkham staff are freaking out#“Do we call batman?! Do we even have batman's number?!”
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Hi. I'm cyberbullying a long dead poet because of his shitty fanfic. Enjoy. I'd love it if you joined me.
(Before you get mad at me, yes, I know Eugammon of Cyrene is an important figure and all that. I'm sick with some sort of flu. Let me cyberbully an ancient dead fanfic writer in peace.)
#I think my favorite is the astronaut one lol#because I wanna see Homer fed up and just start taking people out.#Also Penelope not putting up with some little shit.#You know what? I'm gonna be a bitch to people who bring up Telegonus to me and be like “Oh? You mean Polites' son?👁👁”#just to fuck with people >:)#Can you imagine how confused and mad people would get at me??? I love it.#Eris threw the Golden Apple into Thetis' and Peleus' wedding and I threw this shit into tumblr#guys I'm on weird flu medicine aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#I have not slept much because of it🙃#Mad rambles#am I funny yet?#shot by odysseus#anti circe#anti madeline miller#tele-GONE-y#odysseus#penelope#odyssey#the odyssey#tagamemnon#greek mythology#odypen#greek myth memes#Mad memes#penelope of ithaca
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PALADIN SKY YES YES OH MY FARORE YES THIS IS EVERYTHING IVE EVER WANTED GLORIOUS DAY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
Glad you like him
#i started this a month ago and haven't touched it since yesterday#played around with layer modes on procreate and might have gone too far#looks kinda whack on mobile#O well!#facing some major art block at but i know the reason behind it so im not that mad about it#working working working#wilimia art#the legend of zelda#skyward sword#dnd links#tloz#loz
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i keep trying to think of funny/poetic ways to talk about all the things i'm feeling right now but i honestly can't so. i'm really sad about what happened with my partner. i know he was an inconsiderate prick about it and that i didn't do anything wrong and i couldn't have prevented it but i'm just really fucking sad.
#ramble#i think knowing that he was awful and that it wasn't my fault should make all the sad go away actually#i'm in such a weird fragile state right now that last night i looked at my flip flops that are still covered in mud#and i just started crying bc last weekend he carried me over the mud so they wouldn't get ruined. KNOWING he was going to do this to me#sorry i try really hard not to overshare but i don't want to keep bothering anyone in my actual life about this and idk what to do#when it happened it didn't hurt this badly and i just assumed i would be fine#idk i think it's just sunk in how much of my future i don't have anymore and that's like#a bit scary#because i was Just calming down and thinking maybe i would be ok in the long term and now it's all gone#i'm in that weird place between desperately wanting him back and plotting where to bury the body parts#i'm also mad bc i wish he'd left me before the festival. there were SO many gorgeous metalhead trans girls that i could've kissed
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I know the decision to have Julian's parents have him augmented was made on the fly but imo its pretty obvious from early on that Julian has Family Issues because he avoids talking about his family like the plague and I think they should've incorporated this into the Julian and Sisko dynamic right from early on because I think it would've made for some really compelling stories and moments and could've set up a REALLY interesting Julian and Jake dynamic which they kinda started to do but never fully went for
#star trek: ds9#julian bashir#benjamin sisko#jake sisko#s1 Julian being so young and eager to prove himself and latching onto Sisko as this mentor figure to look up to#seeing Sisko with Jake and low-key seeking that fatherly figure connection which he won't even let himself think about#Sisko seeing this young brilliant doctor who's got all the makings to be something great and he's just GOTTA help him along#I think he would also catch on pretty quick that Julian's got Parental Issues#he tries to ask one day all casual like 'tell me about yourself :)' and Julian talks about nothing but Starfleet and med school#any attempts to ask about his family are met with awkward brief answers and redirections#and then theres the way Julian's eyes light up the first time Sisko invites him to watch a baseball game#like he Knows. he's a dad he Knows somethings up#but he doesnt pry#I also think it makes their dynamic more tragic towards the end of the series#where we have Sisko asking Julian to compromise his morals again and again#Julian's trust and respect for him gradually deteriorating#and then at the end of course Sisko is gone and they have no idea when he'll be back#which I think Julian would have a lot of complicated feelings about#but of course theres also Jake#I imagine they'd get closer#very brotherly dynamic#you know that scene in TNG where Wesley goes to Riker for girl advice and Riker and Guinan start flirting?#absolutely happens but with Jake asking Julian for girl advice and Julian wooing a girl at Quark's and Jake absolutely loses the plot#makes the events of ...Nor the Battle to the Strong more intense as well I think#also I like to think there'd be an episode where the B plot is Jake gets mad at Sisko and impulsively decides to move out#ends up at Julian's because he did not think this through#Julian is now very much caught in the middle of this family drama and he Fucking Hates It#also him and Jake are NOT compatible roommates but he's trying so so hard to be nice#eventually they have a talk and Julian cryptically hints at his own home life and tells Jake he's lucky he has a dad who cares so much#them being closer would work into what Alone Together sets up for them
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