#hate to change it but also i want to change it so bad
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Alrighty this is gonna be long but I'm bored so HERE WE GOOO
Kyomu Mori questions
1.Are they associated with a certain colour? What colour do they wear the most?
Because if his hair colour, I'd say he's accosiated with light blue. He usually wears more muted-ish colours like grey, dark blue, and white, but he loves wearing yellow
2. What sort of music would they like? Have you thought about what genres or bands do they lean towards? Do they have a favorite song?
He prefers rock music. Basically any music that makes you feel like you can take on the world. He loves vibing to those. And just because I don't have a fav song, neither does he 😅 (my fav songs change within a week)
3. Weapon of choice? Any particular reason they chose their weapon?
Guns. Any kind of gun, though he prefers pistols and other small, handheld ones. He likes guns because he's always been talented with them. That, and that he was raised by Snipe
4. How crafty/resourceful are they?
I'd say about a 7-7.5 out of ten for this one. Not the greatest, but he can conjure up some resourcefulness when he wants to
5. How do they typically dress? Does their wardrobe lean more toward practicality or aesthetics?
Depending on how he's feeling, his clothing choice changes. On a good day, he'll go for a nice-fitting tank top. On a bad day, he night go for a loose-fitting t-shirt. His clothing style is casual, but kinda aesthetic in a sort of steetsy-kinda way(??). Fashion/aesthetics are important for him, but you'll never catch him wearing anything with pockets he can't shove his whole hand into
6. How do they wear their hair? Do they care a lot about how their hair looks?
He almost always wears his hair in a high ponytail. Although he does this to get his hair out of the way, he always makes sure his hair looks presentable. He's the kinda guy to use a bit too much conditioner
7. Favourite animal? Why?
Dogs. Specifically german shepherds. Because he thinks guard dogs are cool af
8. Do they have a nickname? Who gave it to them? If it's not derived from their real name, what's the story behind it?
His nickname is Kyo. Ashido gave him it randomly one day, and Kaminari immediately started using it too
9. Favourite food? Least favourite? Are they a picky eater? Do they have any dietary restrictions?
Fav: Burgers. Specifically bacon burgers. Least fav: Tomatoes. He's not really a picky eater, but he's not even TOUCHING anything woth tomatoes in it. And he doesn't have any dietary restrictions
10. If they wear jewelry, what kind? Do they prefer silver or gold? Do they have a favourite gem?
He wears earrings and has an eyebrow piercing, but he'll toss on a necklace or two if he wants to look presentable when going out
11. What do they have in common with you? How are they different? Would you get along with them?
He doesn't have a lot in common with me. Ig we both question authority?? Also we both live guns. Overall, he's MUCH more confident than me. We are quite different. I'd say I wouldn't get along the greatest with him, mainly cuz he likes physical touch, and that is something I HATE. You touch me randomly and I freeze, as well as shoot you a dirty look XD
12. How long have they been around? Do you know their birthday? Is their birthday the day you made them or another day? What do they think of celebrating birthdays?
He has been around for 16 and a bit years, and his birthday is on April 6th. This is not the day I made him (actually this is the first I'm hearing of making their release date into their actual birthday. I shall do this for another of my ocs :) ). He loves his birthday cuz it gives him attention xD
13. What languages do they speak? How fluently?
He can speak Japanese, English, and Filipino. He speaks Japanese fluently. His English isn't the greatest, but he's learning from school. His Filipino is REALLY rusty, but he can hold a basic conversation. He knows Filipino because his father is from the Philippines, and he learned the language as a kid, but he hasn't really used it since highschool
14. Are they any good with numbers?
Not really sure how to interpret this, but he's not the greatest at math
15. How big or small is their family? Who did they live with growing up? Do they live with anyone now?
His parents died. He lived with Snipe growing up. Currently, he's living in the UA dorms
16. Do they have any pets? What do they call their pets?
He doesn't have any pets, but he wants a dog. He also kinda maybe sorta wants a bird
17. How did they spend their summers/free time as a child?
He spent a lot of his time at the shooting range growing up, and it's always been a place of comfort to him
18. Their opinion on lying, stealing, and killing?
He thinks they're bad, obviously. But,,, he does think they are justified, and even necessary, in many cases
19. Are they quick to anger? What sets them off?
He doesn't really anger quickly. He's more laid back. And although he does get angry when someone hurts/threatens his friends, he also gets angry when many little things go wrong. Like, you know those days where everything seems to go wrong and you're tripping on things and dropping things? Yeah that gets him angy quickly
20. If applicable, can they drive? If they have their own, what colour is their vehicle? Is the inside neat and tidy, or a mess?
The legal driving age in Japan is 18, so he can't drive. But he may or may not fail many a driving test in the future... Also he has sworn that his future car WILL have racing stripes.
21. Their favourite place to be?
The shooting range
22. Do they sleep well at night?
Kyomu sleeps like a little baby, if that baby takes up the whole bed while sleeping and falls off the bed randomly in the night
23. How would you describe their voice? Can they sing?
His voice is on the louder side. I don't have a voice claim yet, but I may find one eventually. Also he can't sing. Granted, it's def not the worst out there, but it couldn't be considered "good"
24. Do they have any creative hobbies? (Art, writing, music, etc.)
He likes doing graffiti, tho he doesn't do it often. Other than that, he likes to listen to music
25. How good/bad is their hearing? What about their eyesight?
His hearing is a little better than what is considered normal, and his eyesight is good. Little fun fact about his eyesight: He sees yellow slightly better than any other colour. Yellow is very slightly more vibrant and bright to him
26. How do they move? Are they clumsy? Light on their feet? Do they use mobility aids?
Because of how his legs are built, he is slightly more light on his feet. His footsteps don't make a lot of noise. He can be a bit clumsy tho. He's not the most careful with his actions
27. If applicable, do they have a favorite sport? Do they play any sports or prefer to watch?
He likes basketball (probably cuz Kyomu has a height advantage over his friends). Watching sports is boring to him, and he prefers to play some friendly basketball with his friends
28. How do they show they care about someone? How do they express that they don't like someone?
Kyomu shows he likes someone by doing things with them and touching them (not like that. Stop it.). He'll ruffle his friends' hair or playfully poke them, and he's always down to give a massage if asked. Sometimes he'll even find his tail involuntarily grazing by the legs of those he loves.
29. Are they accosiated with any particular element (air, earth, fire, water)?
I don't think he's really "accosiated" with an element, but he'd probably be water
30. Do they smell like anything notable?
Nope. The only notable smell-related thing I can think of is that he sometimes uses women's deodorant because it smells better than men's "forest mud deodorant" or whatever it's named xD
31. Do they like receiving gifts? Giving gifts? What is their ideal gift?
He loves receiving gifts, but not giving so much, because he rever really knows what to get people. His ideal gift is any like, small, neat, unique, silly trinket. He loves collecting silly shit his friends give him
32. Do they have any hobbies that aren't particularly self-destructive, just maybe odd?
Not a hobby, but he drinks the pickle juice out of the jar when he finishes all the pickles.
33. If applicable, how would your other characters describe them? I mean specifically the people around them.
I don't have any other Mha ocs as of rn, but I can do this for his friends. Also I'm not gonna go into how each character would describe him, so ima do how the characters see him Kaminari, Ashido, and Sero see him as kinda like a cool older brother, and they live hanging out with him Kirishima and Jirou see him as a wee bit much, but they still love him and love the energy that he brings to class. Bakugou doesn't like him. Especially cuz Kyomu is taller than him and he doesn't like that Others like Iida, Midoriya, and Ochako don't care for his rebellious personality, but they will admit that he brings up the mood of just about whatever situation he finds himself in
(The thing above is being a bitch and is refusing to be coloured blue and now we must all suffer.)
34. How would your character describe themselves? It doesn't have to line up with who they really are.
Kyomu thinks of himself as more or less the "popular kid" that just about everyone likes. He would describe himself as brave, strong, and willing to stick up for what he thinks is right
35. Do they ever return home?
. . . . ?? He never "left" home?? I mean, he is living in the dorms rn, but idk what this question is getting at :/
Tagging @bluespider008 because I found these questions cuz you posted yours, but I didn't want this to take up a ton of space on my blog, so I just reblogged the original post 😅
Idk if you wanna see this, but you're seeing it now!
Also feel free to reblog with your oc :)
i wanted to make an oc ask game 😋 things i like to ask people abt their characters:
are they associated with a certain color? what color do they wear the most?
what sort of music would they like? have you thought about what genres or bands do they lean towards? do they have a favorite song?
weapon of choice? any particular reason they chose their weapon?
how crafty/resourceful are they?
how do they typically dress? does their wardrobe lean more towards practicality or aesthetics?
how do they wear their hair? do they care a lot how their hair looks?
favorite animal? why?
do they have a nickname? who gave it to them? if it's not derived from their real name, what's the story behind it?
favorite food? least favorite? are they a picky eater? do they have any dietary restrictions?
if they wear jewelry, what kind? do they prefer silver or gold? do they have a favorite gem?
what do they have in common with you? how are they different? would you get along with them?
how long have they been around? do you know their birthday? is their birthday the day you made them or another day? what do they think of celebrating birthdays?
what languages do they speak? how fluently?
are they any good with numbers?
how big or small is their family? who did they live with growing up? do they live with anyone now?
do they have any pets? what do they call their pets?
how did they spend their summers/free time as a child?
their opinion on lying, stealing, and killing?
are they quick to anger? what sets them off?
if applicable, can they drive? if they have their own, what color is their vehicle? is the inside neat and tidy, or a mess?
their favorite place to be?
do they sleep well at night?
how would you describe their voice? can they sing?
do they have any creative hobbies? (art, writing, music, etc)
how good/bad is their hearing? what about their eyesight?
how do they move? are they clumsy? light on their feet? do they use mobility aids?
if applicable, do they have a favorite sport? do they play any sports or prefer to watch?
how do they show that they care about someone? how do they express that they don't like someone?
are they associated with any particular element (air, earth, fire, water)?
do they smell like anything notable?
do they like receiving gifts? giving gifts? what is their ideal gift?
do they have any habits that aren't particularly self-destructive, just maybe odd?
if applicable, how would your other characters describe them? i mean specifically the people around them.
how would your character describe themselves? it doesn't have to line up with how they really are.
do they ever return home?
#Holy fuck this took so long#Lol#Kyomu#Oc#My oc#Original character#my original character#oc stuff#Mha#Bnha#Mha oc#Bnha oc#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#mha original character#bnha original character#Reblog#Questions#my oc stuff#My hero oc
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the boy is mine | k.mg
pet play w mingyu
pairing: kim mingyu x reader, reader’s best friend is yuqi! ((g)i-dle) also cheol lol
wc: 5.6k (can you believe i cut it down?)
genre: strangers -> fucking, smut, little cracky at some parts
synopsis: when one of your best friends (who also happens to be a frat bro), seungcheol, invites you to his halloween party, you hesitantly accept. you were never really the party type… but one guy, one of his new friends to be exact, might single handedly change that.
!other kinktober fics!
a/n: ......heyyyyy... no one hate me. i know im almost a whole month late ): prepping for the svt concert took more time than i anticipated, i live in america so... yeah all that happened, work got in the way, i had a lot of yap days with my wife @jenoslutie which has been so nice!! <3 and i JUST (literally today) got back from visiting my bestie @goblynnrockz for their birthday :p BUT in between all that, i managed to finish this bitch. (pun intended) ALL OF THAT BEING SAID, i really hope you guys enjoy this as much as i enjoyed writing it. and if it seems like its eluding to there being a potential relationship between mc and gyu, well... maybe there will be in the future ;p
(P.S. you must picture long, wavy haired mingyu in this :3 more like the pic on the right. i just put the lolla pic bc it fits the vibe you CANNOT argue w that lol okay imma stop yapping now. ENJOY LUVLIES!!!!)
you weren’t the party type, but when one of your best friends, seungcheol, invited you to his frat’s halloween party with a nearly quivering bottom lip, you couldn’t say no.
“you have to let me bring whoever i want as my plus one.” you deadpanned while crossing your arms.
“so you’ll go?!” he nearly squealed.
you sighed before nodding with an annoyed, “yes.”
“fuck yeah!” he yelled before swooping you up in a big hug. you couldn’t help the laughter that erupted from your chest.
you loved when cheol got all giddy. it was such a silly contrast to his wide, strong build, and that’s always been so enduring yet hilarious to you. you didn’t think anyone else like him existed in real life.
until you met him.
“remind me again why you are dragging me to a party?” your best friend, yuqi, chuckled out from the passenger’s seat of your car.
you took the last right before reaching the house. “cheol asked nicely and… i’ve been needing an excuse to wear these boots,” you smiled, looking for a parking spot.
yuqi silently pointed to a spot on the street, and as you parked, she went on. “i just can’t help but wonder why cheol wanted you to go so bad like… he knows you’re not a partier.”
“he wants me to get out of my shell more.” you shrugged, getting out of the car.
“well you’re definitely out of your shell, fucking look at you. a full latex outfit and tits out? girl…” yuqi gawked at you for a moment.
dressing as blackcat was far out of your costume comfort zone. normally you went the horror route. billy the puppet, jennifer check (in the prom dress with the contacts, blood and all), freddy krueger, etc. so, wearing a latex set that left nothing to the imagination except for any ink you may have on your skin was out of character, but you wanted to spice it up this year.
“i think the little mask helps be feel a bit hidden,” you giggled seen as it’s a thin black eye mask, not hiding who is under it at all. yuqi jokingly scoffed and you then took the attention off yourself. “look at you, catwoman. you look devious with that whip,” you cooed, then took her hand in yours and gave her a spin on the sidewalk.
“oh stop it,” she blushed. “let’s get inside before it starts getting too crazy.”
you two walked in practically attached at the hip. you scanned the front room for cheol, yuqi doing the same. “ah! there he is,” she pointed toward the kitchen.
you looked over, immediately making eye contact with him. he waved you guys over to stand with him and some frat bro you didn’t recognize.
“y/n!” he greeted you with a bear hug, unfazed by your tits practically spilling from your top. “and yuqi! hey long time no see!” he said sweetly, giving her a side hug.
“hi! it’s good to see you, cheol,” she giggled.
“are you gonna introduce us?” you motioned to his friend beside him and smiled.
the friend smiled and reached a hand out, “hey, i’m chan! nice to meet you both.” after shaking both of your hands, a warm smile across his face, he turned around to finish concocting a drink for himself.
“you know we have a spare room. if you guys want, you can have some drinks! chan makes a mean lemon drop.” cheol offered you both.
yuqi got a devilish smile on her face, “don’t mind if i do, fred. one lemon drop, please, daphne!” she giggled leaning backwards on the counter next to chan, watching what he was doing over her shoulder. she faced forward after a moment and motioned her head toward you. “what about you miss latex?” she smirked giving you a once over. the girl wasn’t even drinking yet and she was already getting flirty. typical. (<3)
“don’t even let her answer that,” seungcheol quickly intervened. “make blackcat a drink, please. the pretty lady deserves it,” he grinned, wrapping an arm around you.
“well thank you, cheolie… but deserve it? for what?” you asked cutely, looking up at him.
“putting up with my bitchass. thank you for coming tonight. i’m glad you did,” he stated sweetly, giving you a kiss atop your head. you just leaned into him, silently telling him “you’re welcome” and “me too”.
“what’s up?” you look over at chan who’s finishing your drink up, and he’s got his phone between his ear and shoulder. “oh shit okay! we’ll be right out!” he hung up, sliding the phone in his pocket, then turned around handing you your drink. “pretty lady,” he smiled. “cheol lets go. that was vernon, they’re outside.” he said, patting cheol on the shoulder, making his way out of the kitchen hurriedly.
“okay! you two wait right here, i’ll be back.” seungcheol requested, then ran after chan.
“oh god,” you walked forward to the counter and turned so your back was leaning on it with yuqi. you two looked out from the kitchen, into the crowd of people that had seemingly gotten significantly larger since you’d arrived minutes ago. “they’ve all gotta be members of the mystery inc huh…” you trailed off.
“i wonder what poor guy they got to be scooby,” yuqi empathized.
“i bet it’s soonyoung.”
“be so fucking for real, y/n. he’s a fucking tiger every year,” yuqi said pointedly. she was right.
just then, the room got significantly more quiet meaning- oh those boys and their group entrances…
it was never anything elaborate, but they did have to make their presence known. cheol almost always walking in first as the rest of the boys followed.
you and yuqi made your way out of the kitchen to the living room, disregarding cheol’s words from earlier. you two managed to push toward the front of the swarm of people that were gathered near the door. shouts then could be heard from all over, praising the commitment of all the boys. first was cheol as fred, then chan as daphne walking alongside wonwoo as velma, and last but not least vernon as shaggy with… not soonyoung as scooby. “who the fuck is that?” you nearly drooled leaning over into yuqi’s ear.
“wonwoo?” she suggested.
“no, dumbass, obviously i know wonwoo… who’s scooby?” your voice dropping a cool octave or two in curiosity.
“i don’t know but… fuck is he fine,” she said bluntly.
you both had your eyes locked on him until yuqi’s gaze redirected to wonwoo… her main interest right now and always. “if you’ll excuse me,” she hummed, grazing a hand across your shoulder and handing you her whip as she strolled forward toward the tall boy wearing thicker framed glasses than normal.
you made your way back to the kitchen to wait for one of your friends to come back, knowing one of them would find their way to you.
or so you thought.
someone did definitely make their way to you, but it wasn’t cheol, yuqi, or even chan.
“i didn’t know blackcat carried around a whip,” scooby shot you a cheeky smile while reaching beside you on the counter for a drink.
you smiled, leaning your hip on the counter to face him. “she doesn’t, but cat woman does and she needed me to hold it for her.”
“well… i’m glad she needed you to because it gave me an excuse to talk to you.” you both chuckled, your face getting flushed. he turned, mirroring your position against the counter. “i’m mingyu. i just joined the frat,” he explained rather shy in comparison to his confident demeanor that he approached you with. it was charming.
“well hello mingyu,” you chuckled, chugging the rest of your lemon drop. “i’m y/n. i’m friends with cheol.”
“oh no way! you’re like… his best friend,” he laughs trying his drink. you giggled watching his face contort at the potency of the alcohol. “hey don’t laugh! bleh! but it’s nice to finally meet you.”
“it’s nice to meet you too,” you covered your mouth to snicker a bit more as if that makes it any less “mean”.
once he recovered a moment later, he sat his cup down and spoke up again. “you know, y/n, you make a beautiful blackcat,” he complimented, giving you a once over as respectfully as he could. from the minute he laid eyes on you when yuqi had walked way from you, he knew he had to talk to you. your little whip that didn’t go with your costume was his perfect excuse, and… you looked amazing. that could’ve even been enough of an excuse on its own.
your cheeks grew warm at the compliment with his demeanor and tone. it’d shifted to something more sensual than before. his eyes getting darker, but still soft.
“thank you,” you smiled before reaching up to play with one of his ears. “and you make an adorable puppy.”
his body stiffened, but it was so subtle you almost didn’t notice. you chose to ignore it, moving to his collar. “did minghao make this?” you asked, tilting your head admiring the well recreated scooby dog tag. you pulled on it a little, as if to test its durability, but really you wanted to see if this was doing something to the tall man before you. sure enough, you watched as he swallowed rather hard under your touch. you wouldn’t have noticed had you not been staring at his throat already.
“y-yeah he did. he’s really talented,” he said softly, slightly tilting his head back as you took your finger from the collar, and slowly traced it down his chest that was only covered by a thin, tight brown t-shirt.
“what’s the matter, scooby? cat got your tongue?” you asked in a very playful way, not wanting to come off too strong too fast as you were already mere centimeters away from his body now.
when he looked down at you, his eyes were pleading. desperate. like he was silently begging for you to do something more. he couldn’t find the words to answer your silly question. instead he sent his eyes to scan your face, lingering longer over your lips.
“gyu!” you both jumped back from each other. up pranced soonyoung, but he wasn’t a tiger. “and y/n? hey!” he gave you a hug and you squeezed him back.
“hey soonyoung!” you gathered your composure far quicker than mingyu who was still trying to comprehend what the fuck just happened. “a cowboy this year?” you motioned your hands to his costume.
“had to change it up,” he shrugged. “still got my date, though,” he grinned. you knew it was the stupid plastic skeleton he dragged along every year in the spirit of the holiday.
“well, wherever you set her down, i can imagine she goes way better with this outfit than the tiger onesie,” you both laugh.
“girl… a whip? i don’t think blackcat-“
“shutup, i know. it’s yuqi’s. she’s catwoman.” you deadpanned.
he put his hands up as if to surrender, “got it, no need to use it on me.” you two laughed together again.
mingyu wasn’t enjoying this conversation like you and soonyoung were, however.
he gently grabbed your wrist while patting soonyoung on the shoulder. “excuse us,” were the first words to come out of his mouth in the past couple minutes. it came out low and demanding, an extreme contrast from the state you had him in before soonyoung showed up.
you looked at soonyoung then shrugged your shoulders in confusion and blew him a quick kiss, whip in hand as mingyu pulled you away. “have fun!” he yelled after you both.
“mingyu, where the fuck are we going?” you finally ask as he's pulling you up the stairs.
“my room,” he states bluntly.
“your room? why didn’t you just get ready here then?” your genuine curiosity taking over.
mingyu stopped you both in front of his door. “except for cheol and chan, we all got ready at vernon’s,” he answered very matter of fact, then his eyebrows furrowed remembering what he was doing.
he opened his door, pulling you in with him. once he closed the door, he grabbed you and pushed you against it, hands cupping your face, instantly attacking your lips with his own. your hand naturally found its way to his long, wavy hair while your other rested on his chest. you slightly tugged at his hair, a groan escaping his lips. you smiled and chuckled against his mouth, knowing exactly how this was gonna end, despite his attempts at taking control of the situation.
he ignored your cockiness, moving a hand to the zipper of your top, toying with it just to be a dick. after about 10 seconds of that, you decided it was enough.
“why don’t you be a good puppy and unzip me already,” you pull on his hair hard enough to pull him away this time. his eyes desperately searched yours, not understanding, himself, why every time you called him that, it made him feel weak in his knees.
“o-okay,” he stuttered before unzipping your top the rest of the way. his mouth hung open at the way your tits broke free from the tight latex. “god..” he whispered. eyes still locked on your chest, he tried to speak, “c-can i please-”
“yes,” you breathed, not letting him finish his sentence, knowing exactly what he wanted.
mingyu wasted no time, latching his mouth onto one of your nipples, desperately sucking on the skin as if his life depended on it. a low groan escaped your lips as you finally dropped the whip on the floor, and moved that hand to his back, lightly scratching at him through the thin fabric of his shirt. he moaned against your chest, sending a chill down your spine.
“on your knees,” you demanded. he pulled away from your chest with a rather puzzled expression on his face. “don’t make me say it again,” and with that, he practically dropped to the floor, looking up at you with the most beautiful eyes you’d ever seen. “good boy,” you praised, petting his head between his ears. you walked over to his bed, sitting yourself down at the edge of it.
“come,” you said gently. mingyu started to stand up. “nuh uh,” you stopped him. “on all fours.”
“i- but i-,” he tried to protest, stumbling over his words.
“crawl. or i’ll walk out that door right now,” you threatened.
he immediately got back on his knees, then bent forward, using his arms to help him crawl over to you. he didn’t break eye contact as he made his way to where you sat on his bed, your legs slightly opened. you leaned down, reaching in between your legs for his collar. you hooked two fingers underneath it and pulled him forward. he wrapped his arms around your waist, knees still planted on the floor as he looked at you longingly.
“what a good puppy,” you cooed, moving your hand from his collar to his hair along with your other hand. you petted him right next to his ears on either side of his head. he hummed, tilting his head to the side, you moving your hand so he could rest his face on it. you thought this was just gonna be a typical dom/sub dynamic, but you quickly started realizing that it was far more than that.
you leaned down giving him a soft kiss to his lips, making him crave more. he moved his hands up to your face, pulling you back down. you both hungrily attacked each others lips, breathing in every bit of the other. “what the fuck are you doing to me,” he growled between kisses. to be quite honest, you had no idea either. you didn’t even know this man, really.
“get on the bed,” you demanded, out of breath. he mumbled, “okay,” then stood up and sat in the middle of his bed. “lay down, obviously,” you deadpanned. he felt like an idiot as he laid himself down. he watched you with big eyes as you crawled up his body. you sat yourself on top of him and reached to hook your fingers under his collar again. you used it to pull him up to your level.
“take your stupid shirt off.” he fumbled with the hem of his shirt, lifting it up and over his head. you ripped it from his hands and threw it across the room to god knows where. you pushed him back down, diving after his neck with your mouth. his back arched slightly from the bed as a whimper escaped his lips. as your teeth sunk into his skin, beginning to suck, his chest pressed against yours.
he knew it wasn’t physically possible for him to get closer to your body, but he could try. he was desperate. he craved your warmth. he craved you. a complete stranger. “y/n, please,” he whined.
“please what?” you whispered into his ear, then proceeded to kiss down his neck to his chest. all he could do was make pathetic little noises in response. “cmon, use your words like a good boy, huh?” you cooed looking up at him. you traced your fingers over his large pecs sending chills through his whole body.
“f-fuck,” he threw his head back into the pillow. “fuck me, y/n, please!” he panted, grabbing at the sheets beneath him.
“you’d like that, wouldn’t you?” you teased as you slipped a hand under his pants, grabbing him through his boxers. you couldn’t help the sigh that escaped your mouth when you felt how big he was. he looked down at you with flushed cheeks, embarrassed at how easily he was being turned on by your words alone.
“i- i would love that, y/n,” his eyes were so desperate, so needy. “c-can i take my pants off?” god, he was so obedient. it excited you beyond your own comprehension. before you could even think about it, you hooked your fingers under the waistband of his pants and started shimmying them down his thick, muscular thighs.
“fuck,” you mumbled under your breath. the tent in his boxers was intimidating to say the least. you sat on his thighs as you pulled his cock out, admiring the way it grew even more at your direct touch. mingyu was panting like a bitch underneath you and you hadn't even started stroking him yet. “easy there, big boy,” you giggled at his uneasiness. as you started pumping him with one hand, you used the other to stabilize yourself above him.
a deep groan ripped from his throat as he screwed his eyes shut at the sensation. “does that feel good, puppy?” you asked innocently. mingyu whimpered and looked into your eyes again, mere inches away. he used all his extra strength to push his head up to capture your lips with his. this kiss was far deeper than the others. it felt… more intimate than before.
“please y/n i need you,” he whispered against your lips. honestly, you needed him too, so instead of continuing the torture any longer, you got off the bed to remove your top completely, and took your pants off. before getting back on top of him, you pulled his pants the rest of the way down, then stood at the edge of the bed, gawking.
this man’s body was godly. skin the perfect shade of gold, soft muscle curves, the slight glisten on his skin as the moonlight from the window reflects off of his sweat. and his face… fuck, his face. the way his eyes glisten with lust and need, his lips swollen and slightly parted as he’s nearly drooling, waiting for you to do something, and to top it all off, his puppy ears on his head with the collar on his neck making him all the more irresistible.
you climbed back on top of him, his eyes not leaving yours, whether you were looking back at him or not. he only looked away when you started grinding your soaked cunt against his cock. he watched intensely as your slick coated him from top to bottom, his tip leaking precum each time you slid forward. “ready for me to fuck you, gyu?” you nearly whined out, your hands firmly placed on his chest to balance yourself.
“b-been ready, mo-” he stopped himself. “fuuuck please, y/n, please.” he begged.
“what a good fucking boy you are. don’t even have to ask you to beg.” you lifted yourself, and as if there was a form of telepathy happening, he reached down to lift his cock straight up, ready for you to do nothing but line yourself up and sink down in him. however… you both knew that was going to be painful for you. your nails began to dig lightly into his chest as you slowly sunk yourself down on him. a long string of whimpers falling from your lips while he gripped your hips, helping you steady yourself as you now sat all the way down on his cock. you swiveled your hips a couple times before slowly lifting them and slamming back down onto him without warning. a gasp escaping your own lips.
“ah! Fuck!” mingyu cried out, throwing his head back into the pillows again. the grip he had on your hips only tightened.
you moved your hands to his neck, applying only slight pressure as you started moving up and down on his cock. his breathing became sporadic, and you could feel his veins on his neck starting to bulge under your fingers as you started to pick up your pace. “collar getting too tight?” you breathed.
“n-no,” mingyu choked out. “mmmph~ i like it,” his voice was hoarse, but soft. his hands finally moved from your hips to roam your body. he dragged them up your waist until he was cupping your tits. he started kneading the flesh, licking his lips as he watched your face start to contort with pleasure. you let go of his neck and put your hands on top of his, over your chest.
the scene was so beautiful before him, he was growing more and more impatient, needing to chase his high. you threw your head back crying out a “fuck!” as mingyu started meeting each bounce of yours with a sharp thrust.
“a-am i doing a good job?” he whined, “does it feel good?” all he wanted was your validation and praise.
“y-yes~ fuck- such a good boy for me,” you cooed as stable as possible. you brought a hand down and combed your fingers through his hair right below his puppy ears. his thrusts slowed and so did you. you hadn’t realized how much of the “fucking” was being done by him now instead of you. he hummed and closed his eyes while you ran your fingers through his hair again. both of your movements came to a complete stop. nothing but cockwarming and heavy breaths while you petted the pretty boy beneath you.
once he opened his eyes, you gave him a soft smile and he nestled his face into your hand. looking up at you with those puppy eyes, the next words that came out of his mouth were jarring to say the least. “w-will you sit on my face? please?” you could’ve sworn he batted his lashes too.
you giggled before teasing him, “are you seriously asking to pleasure me right now?”
“no im fucking begging, y/n please.” he whined.
“well, when you beg like such a good boy, how could i tell you no, hm?” you hummed before moving your hands to his headboard, climbing up his body, stabilizing yourself over his face.
he wasted no time trying to attack your core with his tongue, but you didn’t want to let him have it that easily. you moved a hand down to tug at his hair, pulling him off of you. “nuh uh. stick out your tongue,” you demanded.
“w-what?” his eyes were big with uncertainty.
“did i stutter? stick out your tongue and stay like a good puppy.” you spit at him, no patience left in your voice.
so, mingyu did just that. slowly but surely he opened his mouth wide, laying his tongue out for you like the good boy he was.
you lowered yourself back down onto his tongue, slowly moving your soaked cunt back and forth. he just looked up at you with such adoration in his eyes, but tongue out like an absolute idiot. it was driving you crazy.
mingyu was going arguably more crazy, though. he wanted to devour you. taste every single inch of you, and lap up every last drop of your arousal like there was no tomorrow.
you let out a whimper that drove him over the edge, and he couldn’t contain himself anymore. he brought his strong arms up, wrapping them around your thighs, locking you in place on his face. you gripped onto his bed frame tighter as he began to suck on your clit with such vigor, you almost came on the spot.
fuck he’s good at this.
he then started fucking his tongue in and out of you, using his own strength alone to bounce you up and down slightly on the muscle.
“mmph~ fuuuck~ mingyu please, don’t stop,” you pleaded, knuckles white from holding onto his headboard for dear life. who was he to deny you? he moved one of his hands from your thigh to the bundle of nerves above where his tongue was fucking in and out of you. as soon as he started rubbing gentle but fast circles on your clit, you knew you weren’t gonna last long. the familiar knot in your tummy forming far faster than you’d like to admit.
“p-puppy i’m c-close. gonna make me cum,” you half panted, half wailed.
he moved his mouth away to talk, fingers still working on your clit.
“cum for me please baby, cum all over my tongue,” his voice had dropped to a dangerously low tone. he went back to tongue fucking you and your grip on his headboard became so tight you thought you might break it.
“gyu! fuck! i’m- fuck!” a wave of pure euphoria flooded your whole body faster than you could comprehend. mingyu lapped up every last bit of cum dripping from your cunt.
“jesus christ,” you panted.
“okay y/n, all fours.”
“what?” you looked down at mingyu’s big brown eyes in complete shock.
“i- i’m sorry please can i fuck you on all fours?”
“mingyu i’m not worried about how you wanna fuck me-”
“then, please? can i? I’ve been a good boy…”
“you definitely have,” you reassured, moving a piece of his hair out of his face. “i just don’t know if i have the energy for that right now.”
“you don’t have to do anything, just- y/n just let me take care of you…” his voice was so soft and genuine. nothing like you were used to from a hookup.
“fine… then can i just lay on my back?” you both chuckled.
“whatever you want.”
once you guys repositioned yourselves, mingyu on top of you for the first time tonight, you couldn’t help but let your mind race. i could get used to this view… y/n stop it’s just a fucking hookup, you’ll only ever see him again in passing. but his voice… the way he’s speaking to me is so… sweet… so? he’s probably just fucking pussy whipped. and pussy whipped he was, but it wasn’t that simple.
“are you ready, baby?” his eyes scanning yours intently as if to catch any trace of uncertainty that may reside in your eyes.
“y-yes. at least i hope,” you giggled. a fangy smile gracing his face. fuck, his smile.
as mingyu started to push himself into you, you winced at the stretch. it was almost like he’d gotten bigger since you were on top of him earlier. “ah~ fuck gyu,” you whined.
“too much? do you want me to stop?”
“no, no please don’t stop,” you just gripped onto his arms and closed your eyes.
a couple seconds later and he finally bottomed out, causing both of you to let out a string of low moans as you both adjusted to the feeling of his rather fucking huge dick inside of you. (how else was i supposed to word that like c’mon now)
within a minute mingyu was drilling into you at an animalistic pace. the grip you had on his biceps probably close to breaking skin with your nails. your back arched at its limit. both of you sounding like you're in one of the most hardcore pornos ever filmed. the bed creaking, slamming into the wall… you get it.
the rest of the world had completely withered away at this point when suddenly…
BANG BANG BANG! “jesus christ, mingyu! that you in there?” seungcheol… fuck.
mingyu stilled all movement, “uhhh yeah… what do you want?” he dropped his head onto the pillow right next to your head. you couldn’t help but giggle.
“Sorry.. just uh… have you seen y/n?!” he yelled from the other side of the door. mingyu’s head shot up, both of you looking at each other with complete panic in your eyes.
“you could… you could say that i’ve seen her… yeah?” mingyu yelled back, wincing as he awaited his response.
when seuncheol didn’t answer right away, you decided to speak up. “hi cheol…” you said softly but loud enough for him to hear you.
“you’re fucking kidding,” seungcheol scoffed before walking away yelling, “you two fuckbirds have fun!”
you and mingyu just laid there for a second before bursting out laughing.
“okay that was embarrassing,” you covered your face.
“oh don’t act like you didn’t like it,” he grinned, leaning down to start kissing on your neck. “you think i can’t feel how much wetter you got?” he bucked his hips into you without warning, making you yelp. he just chuckled, lifting his head up to look at you again.
your mouth was hung open like an idiot, unsure of how to respond, actually embarrassed now.
“look who’s the tough guy now, huh?” he taunted, beginning to slowly pump in and out of you again. your eyes rolled back into your head and your hands reached for his hair. sensing that the puppy fun would be ending now, you tried to focus your vision enough to unclip the ears from his hair and throw them elsewhere in his room. “oh, are we done with those now?” he asked in such a bitchy tone, you could’ve slapped him back into his submissive state, but you were over the playing now.
“mingyu, just fuck me,” you panted now able to put your hands in his hair how you please.
“that’s no way to get what you want now, gorgeous.”
“mingyu, please just fuck me already!” you whined, wrapping your legs around his torso.
the groan that escaped his lips at that action was inhuman as he sped back up to his pace from before, however, far harder.
“fuck! Mingyu!” you cried out, unable to do or say anything else.
“what? wanted me to f-fuck you, no?” he teased, stopping to lift one of your legs over his shoulder, then removing your mask in one quick motion before pounding into you again. the new angle pushed you to your limit once again, far too fast for your own sanity. “let go for me again baby, i can feel it. you’re c-close aren’t you?” he cooed softly in contrast to his brutal movements. “touch yourself for me,” he breathed.
you moved a hand down to your clit, rubbing away at the bud while your other arm moved to his back, pulling his body closer to yours as you reached your high. the close proximity bringing his clingy self closer to his own breaking point.
now forehead to forehead, the knot in your stomach about to snap, you moved your other hand up to his back, fingertips lightly pressing into the skin. mingyu brought a hand to your neck, holding it gently, but firm as he railed into you for the last few times.
“-m cumming!” you cried, now digging your nails into his back.
“fuck!” he growled at the lovely sting of the scratches you were leaving. your cunt fluttering around his cock however was the final straw. “ah~ baby~” he groaned before crashing his lips into yours as his orgasm hit.
“so… you always have wipes conveniently available on your nightstand?” you giggled, curled up in his arms under his blankets.
“you know, it was actually pure luck,” he started. “cheol did a grocery run today and when he brought me my bag there were a couple of our toiletries and i was gonna go put them in the bathroom bu-”
“hey, gyu?” you looked up at him.
“yeah?”
“shhhhh…” you smiled, placing a soft kiss to his lips before laying your head back down on his chest.
he kissed the top of your head and whispered with a chuckle, “sorry. i talk too much.”
“uh uh just… sleepy,” you yawned.
how you two managed to tune out the party is beyond anyone’s guess. he didn’t have to run his fingers in your hair for a full minute before you knocked out, but he did anyway until he fell asleep himself.
tag list: @skzooluvr @jenoslutie @iluvhoshi @goblynnrockz @map0fthes0ul7 @unlikelysublimekryptonite @actuallynarii @glttrlix @ninigyuuu @starcandybby (i hope that was everyone! i feel like my list got messed up but hopefully it's right!)
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˗ˏˋ stephanie brown accessible entry point
this is a list of comics to understand the basics of her character! ive seen a lot of people who didnt know where to start to read so ive compiled this list to make it as easy as possible for new readers to get into stephanie brown
who is stephanie brown?
daughter of the criminal and abusive father cluemaster (arthur brown), she became the spoiler to ‘spoil’ her father’s robbery and overall to protect herself and her mother from him. eventually she digs the vigilante life. she becomes robin briefly and is currently one of the batgirls!
as SPOILER:
⟢ secret origins: 80-page giant
this comic /technically/ is set in the future and is steph ‘telling the story of her childhood’ but honestly i find it pretty suitable even with no context and a must read in my eyes to understand her motives and character
⟢ detective comics 647 - 649
her first appearance… with the iconic brick in the face 😭 this comic is not set in a precise timeline, just post-robin 1991 and pre-knightfall so you can read it with no context as well!
⟢ showcase ‘95 #5 (second story)
PLEASE READ THIS i never see it in reading lists and its sooo important to me. it shows steph’s strained relationship with her mother when her dad is not in the picture and briefly some of her school life!
i’d say read robin (1993) afterwards because it consistently features steph, as much as it is ‘tim’s solo run’, but here THE most important stories (they were very hard to pick)
⟢ robin (1993) #3 - 5
her first appearance in the monthly! and lordd the timsteph here makes me sick. tim being saved by steph 🫶 also more on her and her mom as crystal is starting recovery from drug addiction
⟢ robin (1993) issue 15 - 16
not gonna lie, a huge part of me wants me to suggest it because you get to see arthur get his ass kicked by steph (sweet revenge) but theres also steph being saved by tim for a change and more on steph’s relationship with her dad
⟢ robin (1993) #35
this story for me conveys properly the impact that steph’s upbringing had on her sense of justice and morality being fundamentally different from batman and robin’s, something tim and bruce just can’t understand
⟢ robin (1993) #40 - 41
warning / implied SA (ariana ☹️) the story is a two-parter, steph’s side in issue 40 uses diary entries to explain how she feels about the whole vigilante ordeal. issue 41 is more timsteph oriented but it shows tim finally acknowledging his feelings for steph
⟢ huntress/spoiler: blunt trauma
this story happens during cataclysm but its not necessary to read the whole thing + dean’s first appearance 😒 he is the scumbag bastard ‘father of steph’s child’ + helena and steph linkup!!
⟢ robin (1993) #54 and 56-57
BAD CASE OF THE STEPHS MENTIONED + steph and crystal bonding and tim and steph getting together!!! + robin 57 as guilty pleasure :3 their first official date
⟢ robin (1993) #58-65
warning: dixon tackling teen pregnancy. we all know how that goes. remember dean? well steph got pregnant! and that guy bailed on her. dean when i get you. this arc breaks me everytime, steph you deserve the world ☹️
⟢ lewis era robin (1993) aka robin #100 - 120 HEAVY ON ROBIN 111
warning for SA / glimpses on steph’s childhood + dealing with the fact that her father is dead etc etc that will just make you think we should all just kill ourselves yk!!!!
as ROBIN:
⟢ robin (1993) #126 - 128
warning: debatable writing. robin steph! but take everything with like 5 pinches of different salts 😭 its bad y’all but it is essential. dan didio when i get your ass. dan didio when i get youuu
⟢ steph is dead! arc aka batman 634, detective comics 800 and 809, batgirl 62
i fucking hate war games so im not putting y'all through that. here instead: tim being so overcome by grief he can barely react to steph's passing, bruce remembering steph and cass hallucinating her as she is about to die
after that please just imagine that steph came back cause about every issue after her death was the worst ooc writing ever so, again, not putting you guys through that (its tough for stephanie brown fans)
as BATGIRL:
⟢ batgirl (2009)
i wanna say im conflicted about its writing but its about the best thing steph had post-revival. they constantly insult her spoiler legacy so not a fan of that!! but it is essential and i mostly like the rest so whatever :3 steph’s uni arc!
after that honestly nothing happened for her character, so heres on hoping she gets more stuff
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Thanks for the tag!
The most interesting thing about me, I don't know
I mean, I literally threw myself out of my crib at two and landed flat on my head and somehow nothing happened to me
I turned yellow a day after being home from the hospital when I was born and they had to leave me there again for a week.
And my mother wanted to name me after my grandma who was dying of cancer, my grandma basically begged her not to do that because she said that would be bad luck for me and my mother ignored her and ended up naming me like my grandma, and now she doesn't accept I want to change my name.
I had a classmate of mine become my stalker for some years, he would even send other kids to give me encrypted messages, he found my mobile number somehow when I got my first mobile and everything. But nobody would believe the lies he told about me because even the people who had beef with me for some reason knew I hated social interaction and was too unbothered to do anything he said I was doing.
One of my besties in highschool and I were both huge mythology nerds and we thought that was normal so we didn't suspect we both were neuro divergent and since we were both going through puberty we didn't realise we were experiencing gender dysphoria because we thought since the other also experienced it it must be normal😂
A college classmate clocked me as autistic on our first interaction when I wasn't even aware I was and he just blurted out "well, since you're autistic" in a conversation one day, I found that really funny. He was also the same guy who told me "should I act surprised?" When I told him I was agender 😂
I find those things really entertaining, don't know how interesting people find them.
Tags
@leo-dumb-teen-boy
it's so weird to me that everyone on this website is a human person outside of their weird internet niche so rb this with a random bit of your lore
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Alastor Hands You the Aux Cord - Alastor x f!reader
Anon asked for: Hello! Love ur work :) Alastor x f!reader fluff & heavy smut inspired by the song “soaked” by shy smith???
Honey, you got a lot more than you bargained for, and even then I¨m not quite sure that I did it correctly. Alas! I hope you enjoy it either way. So sorry this took so long, it was an undertaking.
Summary: I suck at these so just be patient and kind. Reader was a radio/sound engineer in life and begins to work with Alastor rather closely.
Dividers by @konatasoup
Warnings: Listen, we all know Alastor is a Bad Man(tm). In this story and many, many others, Fucked Up Alastor is going to say Fucked Up Things. Alastor is a sentient red flag. I would like to kindly remind you that you need to carefully decide whether or not that's too much for you before you begin to read. I'd hate it if you read and got triggered by some possessive or otherwise red flag dialogue/prose! If it’s not for you you can simply block me and avoid my other fanfiction. You're responsible for your own reading experience! If smut is not for you, this is not for you. Other warnings include briskets, sandwiches, p in v intercourse, I don't know, standard fare, Alastor is a deeply jealous and possessive man, colleagues to lovers, Alastor’s fluffy, fluffy ears are an erogenous zone I don’t care lalalalala
Words: 9521
Tell me if you want to be added to the tag list! Requests are open and the guidelines are in my pinned post! I
It would be VERY helpful for your reading experience if you listen to the provided music! If the response is good there will be a part two :)
SMUT
Masterlist
It was the sensible thing to do, and took surprisingly little effort to get him to agree. All you said was that radio lived on in your lifespan, nearly one hundred years after his death. You asked if, in life, he would have happily adjusted to innovations in radio technology, and you remember the way he looked down at his claws, all tightened into fists that slowly unfurled. He begrudgingly admitted that he would have.
“That type of microphone you’ve got there wasn’t invented until after you died,” you pointed out.
Radio had been your life’s passion in the living world just as it had been for Alastor. You began in university as a DJ, then changed your major to reflect your newfound love. You started off with communications engineering in undergraduate studies and moved on to wireless communications engineering. Twelve years of your life, you had dedicated to radio.
You were the perfect candidate, and best of all you could make yourself obsolete by teaching him what he needed to know, so it was a win all-around. Kinda. It remains to be seen what he would do with you once you became obsolete.
You did, however, strike up a friendship. Alastor would admit readily that you were a good sound engineer and constantly upgraded his equipment. He would also admit, not quite as readily, that speaking to you was pleasant. You never batted an eye while he ripped apart souls, which he found surprising at first, but when you pulled out a sandwich to eat whilst he did so it elevated to…cute. He typically hates things that are cute.
Okay, fine, you’re cute.
As time passed, you grew more comfortable with each other. Sometimes you even offer him pre-soul breaking sandwiches, and Alastor eats them simply because they were offered by you. He has no idea what a “PB&J” is, only that whoever created it must surely be living amongst you all in hell. He always eats them, though. Every last morsel.
Then something quite remarkable happened. Alastor sat you down after an unusually long broadcast, took the pistachios that you offered him, and gave you the best gift you had ever received.
“Only one,” he said, poking your chest several times. “One song of your choosing at the end of my broadcast. Do you understand?”
You remember nodding so hard it almost hurt.
You had tried not to seem too enthused, so as not to betray your true excitement to your finicky friend, but shouted joyfully into a pillow when you got to your hotel room. You rolled all over your bed, still screaming into the pillow, and spent the rest of the night curating various playlists for the post-show tunes.
The two of you became inseparable. When you weren’t on air, you were still working together on scripts, advertising campaigns, marketing strategies, even merchandising, a pencil stuck through your hair, sandwich wrappers discarded haphazardly.
‘I got my soul ripped apart by the Radio Demon and all I got was this fucking shirt’.
You’re more excited about this than him by far, but it was becoming harder and harder to deny you a thing. He’s always criticised Vox’s use of petty merchandise to belittle him, but this was different. Entirely.
It had been a rather destructive day in the radio tower the first time you played a song. There were three soul rendings today, so everything but you was covered in blood and viscera. Alastor, with a small smile, offered you his staff, and explained all you had to do was play a song on your phone while holding it.
It felt special. It almost made your cheeks warm, but that crisis was thankfully averted and you chose a tribute to radio itself as your first ever post-show track.
‘Radio, someone still loves you.’
Alastor didn’t look particularly happy with what he’d heard, but he did give you an amused little pat on the head before taking his staff and leaving the radio tower, still covered in blood.
You remember all of that fondly and take a bite of your sandwich. Alastor takes one bite of his and goes feral.
“Calm down over there,” you chastise. “It’s just pastrami.”
He swallows. “You know my feelings about brisket, darling.”
“Well, I’ll bring you more pastrami in the future, then. Maybe I’ll even make you a brisket someday.”
“Yes, you should,” he almost snaps. “And I’ll have no more ‘peanut butter’, by the way.”
“Do you like the almond butter better?” you ask, offering him another sandwich from the basket you brought with you
“…I prefer the pistachio and cashew one.”
“Okay, I’ll find more of that,” you say before passing him a napkin. You sigh and grab the clipboard set to the wayside. “No souls today.”
“Yes, I am aware,” he says.
“Isn’t that less fun for you?”
Alastor ponders over his answer for a moment. “It is more fun to murder. However, not having one or more to murder also means that no one has challenged or crossed me. That is better in the long run.”
“I can see that logic.” You nod, then go back to the clipboard. “Oh, I can’t be here on Saturday.”
His expression sours and his eyes narrow. “And why is that, darling?”
You smile at him, arms up. “I’m going to Lu Lu World!”
“What in the world is that, darling? Wait a moment.” His eyes narrow anymore. “It has nothing to do with that circus freak does it?”
You purse your lips and tilt your head, staring at him. “You’ve lost me.”
“The hell I have. I find it absolutely unacceptable that you would leave work behind in order to prance around in an amusement park.”
“I don’t plan on prancing, so we’re good,” you say. You wrinkle your nose and chuckle a little at his steadily souring expression. “Tell you what. I’ll make you that brisket.”
“Two briskets,” he’s quick to demand. “No, three. Three briskets, and I’m not sharing with the others like you made me do on Beignet Day.”
“That was never meant to be just for your enjoyment!”
“Well, it should have been!” he snaps.
You laugh again and fold your hands over the clipboard. “I will miss work on Saturday to be escorted around Lu Lu World by its namesake and you will receive three briskets at a time of your choosing. You’re in for a treat, I make the best brisket. My husband loved it.”
A pregnant silence fills the radio tower.
“I find it equally unacceptable for you to have a husband. No, no more of that,” he says finally.
“I’d like to think I’ll find love again someday!” you say, laughing.
He huffs. “Is it a date?”
“Is what a date?”
Alastor rolls his eyes. “Your petty little outing to the amusement park with the circus freak!”
“He’s the King of Hell, not a circus freak!” you exclaim.
“If he doesn’t want to be called a circus freak he should dress like an adult male,” he says.
At that, you sit up straight, arms folded, and stare at him. “Do you really want to go there? Making fun of how he dresses?”
“My manner of dress is unimpeachable! Everything is just so!” Alastor gestures at his suit, then narrows his eyes again. “You will not marry him.”
“Marriage isn’t on the table, I’m just visiting his park with him. It’s closed for the day, no one but us! Oh, but also you can’t tell me who I can and can’t marry,” you say.
“There will be no marriages at all! We have work to do, important work!” He closes his eyes, touches his forehead, and growls. “Do not sass me.”
You take another bite out of your sandwich. “So I won’t be here Saturday.”
“…Fine. I can go back to the Stone Age for one damn day.”
You groan. “I’m glad no one else knows of your flair for the dramatic.”
“And you’d do well to keep it that way,” he says. He holds up three fingers. “Three briskets. I want them all at once.”
“I don’t have the time to do them today, as you said, we have important-ish work to do,” you say.
He eyes you again. “Three. Briskets.”
You throw your hands up. “Fine! I hope you get a tummy ache!”
“I will not! I will enjoy the briskets and be fine!” Alastor adjusts his butterfly tie and stands up from his chair. “And you will make up for lost time from your Saturday outing.”
“No I won’t,” you say. “I’m under no such obligation to work every single day with no breaks. I just haven’t had anything better to do in a while.”
Alastor’s hand smacks against a panel. “No! You’re to work with me every day, that is the arrangement! Good god, woman, you are so insolent today. All of hell listens to these broadcasts. I do not know how to do what you do. You have made yourself necessary and now you want to cut and run so you can have intercourse with that circus freak in a hall of mirrors.”
You tilt your head back and laugh.
He looks unamused by this. “What? What is it? Why are you laughing?”
“I suppose I’d better fuck him in the hall of mirrors, then, if you think the opportunity presents itself.” You wipe your mouth with a napkin and put everything else in the garbage for Niffty to collect.
Alastor’s ears flatten. “I do not like you today.”
“Nah, you adore me.” You look closer at the agenda for today and begin warming up the necessary equipment. You pull on your headphones “Thirty seconds, Al.”
He nods and repeats it back to you. “Thirty seconds, Al.”
By the end of the show, you’ve already got your topical track selection queued up. Alastor stands up and stretches before giving the staff to you and rifling around for more sandwiches in the basket.
‘They come running just as fast as they can ‘cause every girl crazy bout a sharp-dressed man’
You lip sync along, not realising you’re being watched. Alastor smiles to himself and waits for his staff to be given back to him. When it is, he almost remarks about your Saturday outing. Almost.
In your bedroom, you stretch and yawn. It’s late and you need to be with Alastor relatively early, so you go about your nightly routine. Brushed teeth, silky pyjamas, all lotioned up, feeling amazing. That is, until you walk back to the area with the bed. You scream and jump, but your surprise is quickly replaced by anger. Alastor laughs from his comfy position against your pillows.
He points at you. “You are the chicken in this relationship.”
You get in beside him and try to shove him out of the bed, chuckling as he easily resisted. “What are you doing in here?”
He’s still laughing. “I came to collect you! Emergency broadcast.”
You groan loudly. “Absolutely fucking not!”
“Yes!” He wraps an arm around you and drags you up from the bed. “It won’t take too long.”
“Who the hell pissed you off this much that you have to do this right now, at two in the morning?” you asked.
The answer makes your stomach drop.
“Husker!” he says excitedly.
You flail. “No. No! No, Alastor, you can’t do that!”
“I assure you that I can,” he says, now picking you up and carrying you towards the radio tower. “Husker’s soul is mine to do what I want with it, and he knew that before he started making trouble tonight.”
“Alastor!” you shout. “Put me down!”
He looks confused, but carefully sets you down. There are tears on your face that confound him. “What is the matter, my dear?”
“You can’t kill Husk.” You wipe your eyes and sniffle. “You can’t. I know you can in the literal sense of the word. I know that you can, but you can’t, please, I am begging you not to do this. Please, Alastor.”
“Do not mourn for him,” Alastor says. “No one mourned him in life.”
“I think that’s not true,” you say, but take his hands, squeezing them. “Just, just tell me what he did. I’ll fix it. I swear, I’ll fix it.”
Alastor looks down at your hands, so much smaller than his, trying to calm him down. “You really care, hm?”
“Alastor, please, please,” you whisper, squeezing his hands again. “Alastor, don’t do it. I have never asked you for a thing and I never will again if you just please don’t do this. Please don’t kill him, he’s my friend. He’s a soul in the bank for you, but he’s my friend.”
He’s quiet for a very long time, watching your breakdown. You know how it looks. He hates weakness, he hates vulnerability—
Alastor puts his hand on the side of your face and pushes hair away. “Okay, darling. If you want Husker to keep dusting bottles and consuming their entire contents, then that you shall have.”
You feel embarrassed all of a sudden and wipe your eyes. “How about I make you a brisket instead?”
“No brisket is required,” he says. “If you want it then you will have it. I am a man of my word. I will find other means to discipline Husker.”
“Don’t hurt Angel,” you say immediately. “Please. They’re all afraid of you already, you don’t have to do anything to keep them in line. I don’t know what Husk did, but I don’t believe it warrants his death and it definitely doesn’t mean you can do something bad to the only thing he loves more than booze or gambling.”
“Okay,” Alastor agrees.
You blink. “I know it’s not that simple. What do you want?”
“Have I ever given you a reason not to trust me?” he asks.
“Me? Personally?” You think for a moment before shaking your head. “No. But—“
“I’ve never given you a reason to doubt me,” Alastor says. “I have worked with you closely for months now. I do what I say I will do. If you want that damned cat and his spider to live and be unharmed then I will give you that.”
“What do you want in exchange? Don’t say my soul, I’m not giving it.”
“No, not your soul,” he says. “A simple deal.”
You stand up straighter. “A deal? What?”
“I let Husker and the spider go unharmed and you will in exchange never have intercourse with the circus freak.”
Your arms cross. “Alastor, that’s fucked up.”
“I know!” he says warmly.
After a moment, you reach your hand out towards him. He takes it in his and squeezes it, gentle and warm. You’ve seen his power, the green flashes of light.
But there are no green lights. His tentacles remain hidden. The floor doesn’t shake.
It wasn’t a real deal, but you said nothing about that. This was all very strange, and you didn’t know what to make of it. Taking his hand, you give it a pull.
“Come on,” you say. “Let’s go on air anyway. Come.”
He tuts at you. “Rather bossy tonight, my dear.”
“I’ll make sandwiches,” you offer, and he nods.
“Yes, you will make sandwiches—pastrami.”
‘I am just living to be lying by your side but I'm just about a moonlight mile on down the road’
Once Alastor takes the staff from you, he notices that you’ve fallen asleep in your chair. He rides the dark with you in his arms, depositing you safely into your bed.
The next night, for some reason, Husk makes sure your dirty martinis come with two olives and no complaints.
“You will go away from the hotel.”
You look up from your phone, your feet up on one of the panels you’ve been working on. “Excuse me?”
Alastor is stern, serious. His eyes betray no laughter, not a single joke. “You will leave the hotel.”
“No,” you say immediately.
“The Extermination is exactly one week from now, and you will leave the hotel. You will go someplace safe.”
“No,” you say again. “No, hell no, I’m not leaving you all by yourselves.”
“You would be more of a hindrance than help,” Alastor says, and ooph, that one hurt.
“You don’t even know how to defend yourself,” he continues.
“I’ve been doing my best,” you say.
“And that is not good enough, darling.”
Your chest falls and rises. “So you think I have nothing to offer to protect my friends and this hotel?”
Alastor pauses for a moment. “No. I know for a fact that you do.”
“Then what?” you ask. “Why do you want me to leave?”
Again, a few moments pass in silence before Alastor sits beside you. “You would trade something very precious to save this hotel and all of the fools who reside in it.”
”What? What is it? What am I going to give up that’s so special?”
“Your life,” he says. “If you are here, you will sacrifice your life in a trice just as soon as you see someone else is in danger. And I cannot have that. You will leave, this is not a request.”
Your eyes widen and you shake your head. “No. This is my home. This is where I work. This is my family—“
“You will listen to me now and you will listen good,” he says gravely. “I can protect this hotel and kill Adam or I can protect you. Those are the choices. I trust you will not make the selfish one.”
You close your eyes and let out a deep breath. You feel a cry coming on, but head it off at the pass. “What about you?”
“What about me, darling?” Alastor asks. “There is no way for you to help me. You know that.”
“I’m going to look like a coward,” you say.
“I do not care,” he says. “And you shouldn’t either. My priorities are to kill Adam and to protect you. Therefore, you will leave to someplace safe and you will wait for me to come for you.”
You scoff. “Where’s safe? Where’s safe during an Extermination?”
“They are coming to the hotel first and we will not allow them to go any further. You will be safe where I send you and you will stay there.”
Then he does something he’s never done before. Alastor pulls you into his embrace. “You have no idea what I would do to save you. No idea, you stupid, silly girl. You must go. You must.”
“Okay, okay,” you say finally.
“I could give or take almost anyone else in this boring little hovel of a hotel, but I can’t give you. I won’t. It’s very likely this radio tower will need some manner of repair. Who else would do it but you?” He holds you a little tighter.
You close your eyes and lean against him. “I really don’t want to leave you.”
“Because you are an idiot.”
At that, you start hitting him anywhere you can, but the two of you dissolve into laughter.
Eventually, you sigh. “When am I leaving?”
Alastor hums. “Tonight.”
“What?” you look at him again. “Why tonight?”
“I will have time to prepare. I won’t spend days worrying about getting you to leave. It is better that I have this time to focus,” he says. “I will take care of everything. Think of it as more of a vacation than anything else.”
“I won’t, but thank you,” you say. “What will you tell everyone?”
Alastor tilts his head. “About what?”
“About forcing me to leave the hotel because I’m apparently too weak and stupid to fight for it,” you say.
He tsks and shakes his head. “I do not care. Neither should you. But I suppose I will just tell them approximately one-quarter of the truth.”
“Which is what?” you ask.
“That I put my foot down and wouldn’t allow you to die for any of them.” Alastor rubs his face against yours. A confusing gesture, but not altogether out of place, given the tenor of the rest of the interaction.
“I don’t want to die, but—“
“But nothing,” he says. He gives you his staff. “Play one last song.”
You wince. “Okay, grim. No. I’m not playing a ‘last song’.”
He huffs. “The last song until next week, when all of this is over.”
“When all of this is over…” You lean back in your seat, tapping the staff as you think. “Can you…can we hop on the broadcast? For a while? Make it my last proper show until all of this is over?”
You swallow, your throat feeling tight.
“No, darling,” he says. “Not this time. Pick a good song.”
‘Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me! Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me! Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me! Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me!’
Alastor stares at you strangely throughout the entire song. He never once tries to take the staff away from you, not even during the repeated profanity—something that was forbidden. He says nothing of it when the song is done and he takes his staff back into his possession.
“Come.” He holds his arm out for you and you take it. You let him lead you out of the radio tower and you become unsettled as you descend the steps.
“Alastor, I don’t like this,” you say nervously.
“And neither do I,” he says as he guides you to your hotel room.
“Where are you sending me?”
He suddenly stops you once you’re inside the room, his clawed hand coming down to grip your shoulder. Hard.
“Alastor,” you chastise.
His grip only tightens. “I made a bargain for this and you will not piss it away.”
The night crashes down on you in the quiet of your bedroom.
“But where? You made a deal?”
“No, not a deal. More of a…trade which does not benefit me at all, save for it keeping you safe.”
“Alastor, where?” you ask, softly yet firmly.
“In an underground bunker beneath Rosie’s Emporium,” Alastor says finally. “No one would ever think to look there, not with all of Cannibal Town at the hotel, stupidly giving their own lives. Those lives mean nothing to me, nothing at all, but yours is something precious.”
“I’m just your engineer, you know.”
Alastor huffs. “No, you’re not.”
You lift a brow. “I’m not?”
“No.” He pauses. “You also make sandwiches.”
With a little laugh, you nod. “Pastrami.”
“Indeed. Pastrami. Now, pack up, darling. I’ll escort you to Cannibal Town. No, no one will try to eat you. You’ll be with my dearest friend, Rosie. You will be safe with her. If I had any doubts I would send you elsewhere.”
“Okay,” you say softly. “It’s going to be boring without you.”
“I, on the other hand, will finally know peace after six months.”
“Oh, shut the fuck up.”
“Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me.”
You laugh far too hard for it to be so late at night, but Alastor is smiling genuinely.
For a tenth of a second something changes. The way you look at each other…
“So,” he says, sitting at the foot of your bed, one ankle over his knee. “Have you been abiding by our agreement?”
You pull a suitcase from underneath the bed. “Which one? There are new ‘agreements’ every day.”
“Intercourse with Lucifer,” he says flatly.
“Oh Alastor, come on. What if he and I were in love?”
He just glares at you, darkness in his eyes.
“I haven’t seen the man in weeks!”
“Aha!” He points at you. “You would do it if given the chance, wouldn’t you?”
You tilt your head. “Why do you care so much, Al?”
“Because I want to separate him from all possible joy,” he says. “There’s no chance of doing that with Charlie, but I will deny him you.”
“You’re so fucking weird.”
“Shut up and pack.”
“Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me.”
Alastor picks up one of your pillows and throws it at you.
The extended visit with Rosie would be nice if every moment didn’t bring you anxiety so crippling that it cramped your stomach. She was kind, a gracious hostess, and she didn’t ask any prying questions, so neither did you. You were curious about the ‘trade’ Alastor had made for you—for you…
You leave every day for food, because you just cannot trust the provenance of anything in Cannibal Town, no matter how kind Rosie is. You listen to Alastor’s sporadic broadcasts and feel vindicated in how shitty it is without you. Gives you a smile. It sustains you to know that this man still needs you.
On your third day of going out for burritos, you receive a text message that makes you grin, fills you with joy you haven’t felt since you were yeeted from the hotel.
‘New ducks, want to see?’
The second you text back yes, a glowing portal opens and a hand yanks you inside.
“Lucifer!” you cry out happily, hugging him close.
He returns the embrace readily, arms tight around you. “I’m so glad you agreed! Here, let me show you the duck workshop.”
You smile and let him guide you. You and Lucifer just..mesh. It’s always been easier to talk to him than virtually anyone else. For as much as you listen to him about ducks, he listens to you about radio, as long as you don’t mention Alastor. That’s always been an unspoken understanding.
Lucifer rambles happily all the way to the workshop and you happily listen. Once inside, he gives you a little tour. The place is quite literally filled with rubber ducks of all different kinds—there was even a set of KISS ducks.
“This is my latest work,” Lucifer says, showing you a row of little ducks. He picks up one. “This one has wings just like mine! Well, you can’t currently see my wings, but that’s what they look like. There’s six, they’re red, that’s…pretty much it…”
He sounds strangely nervous.
“And this one’s Charlie…”
Yes, nervous.
“Maggie,” he says.
“Actually, her name is Vaggie,” you correct him.
“Oh, golly!” He covers his eyes with his hands, his face turning red. “I’ve been calling her Maggie every time and Charlie never corrected me.”
You chuckle softly. “It’s fine, I’m sure it’s fine. Don’t worry about that.”
He peeks at you from between his fingers. “You really think it’s okay?”
“Charlie probably just felt too awkward to correct you. You know how she is.”
“I hope so,” Lucifer says. “This one is the porn star. He shoots webs!”
You laugh when he demonstrates. “That’s so cool!”
“And this one,” he picks up one of the ducks gingerly, “this one is you!”
You gasp at the attention to detail and laugh joyfully. “That’s so cute, a little me!”
“She has a little radio and everything. And—“ Lucifer presses a button on the underside of the duck and the radio starts to play from its mouth. He looks at you with a wide grin and elbows you gently a few times. “Ah? Ah?”
You laugh again and clap. “Bravo, you outdid yourself. I never thought you would outdo the back-flipping rubber ducky that spits fire.”
“I surprise myself all the time,” Lucifer says happily, placing your duck back down beside his. “Do you have time for a drink?”
You laugh. “Honey, I’ve got nothing but time.”
“Good!” He takes your hand and guides you out of the workshop and through the halls until you arrive at a lavish lounge. He gestures for you to take a seat. “What’ll you have?”
“Oh, whatever you’re having, please.”
Lucifer pours two whiskeys and sits in the chair across from yours beside a fire that emits a cool breeze.
“Thank you so much,” you say when he hands yours to you.
“It’s nothing,” he says. “Charlie told me…you left the hotel.”
You take a deep breath. “Yes, I did. I’ve been staying in Cannibal Town.”
“Why did you go?” he asks softly.
Now you sigh, hoping to keep all emotion from your voice. “Alastor thinks I’m more of a hindrance than a help and wants me to stay away.”
His diamond pupils constrict. “What an asshole.”
“He needs me to help repair the radio tower, when all is said and done.”
“You’re too good for this, you know.”
“What do you mean?”
Lucifer takes a drink. “I mean you’re too good to work on a show that’s just screams and crappy puns. That guy is a clown. You should host your own show.”
“Oh, I haven’t been on air in like…fourteen years. I don’t even know what I would talk about or play. I like being an engineer. It’s cathartic to me. Alastor might not have the most exciting show around, and he’s absolutely horrible, but it’s…hm, I’ve made it sound really bad, haven’t I?”
“Why do you give that guy your loyalty? Why do you feel so beholden to him?” he asks.
Your focus softens. “I…we have a good time together. I think. He likes the sandwiches that I make him.”
“I can almost guarantee that this loyalty means nothing to him,” Lucifer says. “I’m not saying that to hurt you.”
You sigh. “Yeah, I know Luci.”
“Why do you stay, then? Is he paying you?”
“Actually yeah, in a way he does.”
Lucifer cocks a brow and motions for you to continue.
“Oh, he just gives me things, not money. He doesn’t, uh, properly believe that hell should have a currency system. In his opinion it should all be bartering, like soul deals. Therefore, he barters with me. I give him sandwiches and briskets and engineering services, he gives me…just about anything. Last week he gave me a ruby necklace that must be worth a few thousand dollars.”
“You give him briskets?”
You nod. “Oh yeah, there’s always some brisket action going on. He doesn’t know it yet, but there’s a venison brisket in the works.”
“So you work together, you make him food, he gives you expensive jewellery?”
“Other things too, but yes.” You nod again. “That’s the gist. We have a good back-and-forth, but my favourite is getting to play music at the end of his broadcasts.”
Lucifer smiles softly at you. “Those are the only parts worth tuning in for.”
Your face lights up., a big grin and bright eyes. “You’ve heard?”
He nods. “Yeah. I try to catch it. The last one said fuck a lot.”
You laugh, head back against the chair. “Yeah, it did.”
“I’ll give you a radio station of your own. Be his competition,” he said.
Now you sigh. “I actually do like to work with him a lot. He’s…he’s not all bad. He’s always done right by me.”
Lucifer scoffs. “That won’t last. You can’t seriously rely on that to stay stable. Just as soon as he decides he doesn’t need you, he’ll get rid of you. Somehow or another. He’s just…one of the worst sorts of sinners, and he’s proud to be the way that he is. And you? You’re hardly like a sinner at all. I always seem to forget it.”
It’s hard to hear those things about Alastor, even harder because you know they’re probably in some way true.
You’re lost in thought until you hear him repeating your name. “Oh! So sorry, million miles away.”
“Let me get you another drink. Do you want something other than whiskey, maybe?” he asks, sounding somewhat insecure, a little tremor in his voice. “W-what do you normally take?”
You play with a rubber duck on the table and hope it doesn’t spit fire at you. “Dirty martini, two olives. Sounds weird, giving the king of hell a drink order.”
“Nonsense!” Lucifer comes over with a little drink tray, all cheerful. Sweet. He looks so happy that it warms you.
“I should see you more,” you say. “You’re fun to be around and I love ducks.”
He gives a nervous laugh and sits down, passes your drink to you. “You should definitely see me more! Gosh, that would be terrific. I can make you so many ducks!”
“What are you going to work on next?” you ask.
He winks. “I’ll keep you apprised.”
You wink back, smiling. “I’ll be waiting.”
God, there was nothing you wouldn’t give to be on air with Alastor right now. It hits you, causes a slight tremor in your body.
Lucifer gasps. “Are you okay? Is it the drink? I don’t actually know what a dirty martini is so I…May have poisoned you?”
“No! No!” You laugh and shake your head. “No, the drink is fine. To make a martini dirty you just put a bit of olive brine in.”
“Let me try again,” he says, but you stand and stop him.
“Luci, no, really, it’s okay,” you say. “Promise. See?” You drain the contents of the wine glass he had served the ‘martini’ in. Your lower eyelid gives you away, though.
“Oh God,” Lucifer says, hand covering his eyes.
You pull it away gently. “It’s okay, Luci.”
You stay that way, eyes on each other, for a moment that stretches indefinitely.
By the end of it, Lucifer kisses you. Hesitant, gentle. His hand reaches the back of your neck and by now you’re kissing back. Things are happening quickly. Somehow you wind up on one of the couches together, your back to the cushion, him on top of you…
Oh, no.
You break the kiss and sit up. “Sorry. Sorry, Luci. Sorry.”
“Did I do something wrong?” he asks in rushed voice, a slight shake to it.
“No.” You rub your eyes and smack your forehead.
All you could think of was Alastor. The little promise you made in exchange for Husk’s life. You doubted that he would actually kill Husk if he found out…but you couldn’t handle how…he would react.
“Lucifer, I…” But you couldn’t tell him that Alastor was the one keeping him from getting laid.
“I don’t understand,” Lucifer says. “I’m really sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry,” you say softly, squeezing his hand. “I can’t help but notice you’re still wearing your ring.”
“Oh, is that why…? Oh, no, sweetheart, no, I just…Lilith isn’t going to come back to me. I can take it off, it’s just hard to when it’s been…such a long time, being married. I can take it off, sweetheart, don’t worry.”
You squeeze his hand again, gently. “It’s time for me to leave.”
“Oh…Okay,” he says softly. “Yes, of course. You don’t have to stay, just…I don’t want this to be the last time I see you.”
You smile at him, trying your best to instill confidence. “You’ll see me again. Show me to the door?”
“No, absolutely not,” he says. “It’s dangerous! I’ll take you back to Cannibal Town. That’s also…pretty dangerous, you know.”
“Not for me.” That you can say with confidence of your own.
“Come on.” Lucifer reaches for your hand. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to do it again. Just take my hand and I’ll bring you back. You don’t even know where you are right now.”
Well, he’s got you beat there. You squeeze his hand one more time. “Okay. Let’s go.”
You close your eyes for this part.
When you hear a whispered goodbye, you open your eyes and you’re standing before the Cannibal Town gates, alone.
“Do you think that you walk freely all throughout hell, not a care in the world, for no reason?”
Your whole body tightens at the sound of his voice. “Have you just been standing there waiting for me to show up?”
“Not quite,” Alastor says. “Answer my question.”
You sigh, eyes rolling hard. “I’m sure it’s because of you.”
“Correct! So you’re at least that smart.”
You trudge out a path set to finally get you the illusive burrito. “Alastor, I’m not in the mood. I’m hungry, I’m tired, and my absence is definitely noticed at the hotel.”
He appears in front of you. “And how do you know that? Who told you, hm?”
You sigh. “You know who I was with?”
Alastor’s claws grab your arm and then you’re in the radio tower. It nearly knocks the breath out of you and you collide with one of the panels.
“God!” You wince as your knee crashes against a sharp corner. “Hey asshole, I thought I wasn’t allowed to be here! I am so sick of being yanked around today! All I wanted—“
“I ask so little of you,” he interrupts.
Your jaw drops. “Are you serious? You? Ask me? For little?”
“The only commitment I have ever asked of you is not to have sex with that fucking man!”
“And I didn’t!” you shout before pulling out your phone. “Here, see? He just wanted to show me new rubber ducks that he made. And you know what? Mine was adorable, and she played radio when you pressed her button.”
“Am I supposed to understand this innuendo?” he asks, his voice rising.
“I didn’t sleep with him, Alastor! I don’t know what else you want me to say! I almost did, I would have, and it’s all your fucking fault that I didn’t. Someone expressed interest in me and I couldn’t act on it because I made some fake pact with you over it. I should have, God knows I need it.”
“Oh do you?” Alastor steps closer, but you don’t back down.
“Yes!” you yell. “Yes I do, but the only fucking thing I ever do is go on the goddamn radio with you!”
“Such a horrible fate!”
You cover your face with curling fingers. “Take me back to Rosie’s. Take me back to Rosie’s, Alastor. You don’t want me here, remember?”
“Of course I want you here, you fucking imbecile!”
Your anger ebbs slightly. “You do?”
“Yes! I want all of the things you do and I want them all the time! I tried to make my own sandwiches and everything! I was self-sufficient before you, you know. I never needed anyone for anything, then you walked into this hotel and insisted your way into my life, wrecking it up as you went!” Alastor takes a deep breath, trying to ground himself, trying to calm himself. “So now that I need you and go to great pains to keep you safe, you tell me that you want to sleep with that little blond gremlin?”
“How were the sandwiches?”
“Dry and uninteresting!” Alastor grabs you by your arms. “God damn you!”
“What? What?” you yell. “What do you want, Alastor? As far as I can tell, you got me out of the hotel, out of your way, right where you wanted me to be. I was going out for a fucking burrito because I can’t trust the food in Cannibal Town!”
“I advised Rosie very carefully about your dietary preferences,” he says.
“Well, hell, thanks,” you say in a much quieter tone. After a moment, you go sit in your usual spot. “Why did you bring me here, Alastor? My name must be mud around here.”
“No, it isn’t.” Alastor sits across from you. “They just blame me, and that is fine.”
“I really think you two should put all this behind you,” you say.
“The two of us? We won’t be putting anything behind us, darling.”
“Actually!” You point at him. “I was talking about you and him. The guy you call a circus freak, a blond gremlin.”
“Ha! No. Try again, dearest.”
You just roll your eyes and rub your temples. “I’m seriously so hungry and so tired. What do you want to hear?”
“I—.” Alastor cuts himself off. “You. And I…it’s your fault, all of this is your fault!”
“Okay! Fine! It’s my fault. Now what do you want to do?” you ask.
Alastor jerks you up from your seat and kisses you, hard. You feel his fingertips fan over the tops of your shoulders, drumming once before holding tight.
It’s so absolutely stunning that it takes a moment to respond at all, but that doesn’t seem to slow him down. Your heart beats so hard in your chest that you can almost hear it, and, oh, damn, this is what had been missing, fulfilling a craving that you had never known. This was what blood was for, what hands were for, why breath existed.
His hands move lower down your body as the quick seconds pass like butterflies all down your skin and to your bones.
You pull away just to catch a breath and his whole body tenses.
“What?” you ask, panting.
“Did I hurt you?” he asks.
You shake your head. “No, Al, not even a little bit. Just couldn’t breathe, blood’s all rushing.”
Alastor’s fingertips trail deliciously above your belly. “Do you know what I want?”
You swallow, lips pressing together. “Tell me.”
His thumb traces down your throat now. “I want to possess you so completely that you forget all but my name.”
His lips follow the path of his hands, surprisingly soft and warm against your neck. “Everything about you was made for me. Everything. I am never letting you go, do you understand me?” His tone was gravely serious, but with an undercurrent of…love. Yes, it was love, yearning and…maybe a bit of uncertainty. He could not hide that, not from you.
“Let’s go to my room,” you say quietly when he pulls away, and in an instant you’re there. Everything looks the same, thankfully. You go to the bed and sit at the foot of it, leaning back on your elbows.
Alastor comes and stands before you, just looking down, watching. When he finally moves, it’s to put both hands underneath your shirt and push it up, every bit of skin revealed covered in goosebumps. He slowly pushes the shirt up and up until your arms lift and it comes over your head.
“Why are you choosing to do this now?” you ask as he works on your bra.
“Because you said that you needed it and I take your needs very seriously,” he responds.
“Whoa.” You grab at my hands. “No, it’s not just me, you have to be into it too.”
Alastor laughs suddenly. “How about I show you how ‘into it’ I am? Kind of you to make certain, darling.”
“I don’t ever want to make you feel like you have to, because you’re…”
He plays with one of your exposed breasts thoughtfully. “You are kind for that, too. Perfect, really. Darling, I do whatever feels good, in all things that I do. This is good, I have simply never felt that way before you and your goddamn radio expertise and your fucking sandwiches and, oh, the briskets.”
Alastor sighs and moves on to the other one. “I have never wanted this before, and that is meaningful to me. It isn’t all I want, but I want you in all other ways so much that it makes me crave you. My hands on your body, your hands on mine. I’ve waited long enough to know that I am certain. Are you?”
“You are a discovery,” you say. “You unlocked things I didn’t realise were there. I want you badly.”
“It’s not just what the spider calls ‘general horniness’?”
You pull him down and kiss him several times before responding. “No, it isn’t. If it wasn’t specific to you, I could just as well bedded Luci. I had every opportunity earlier tonight. But I was always going to turn him down. I did so because I thought of how disappointed and angry you would have been.”
“You’re goddamn right I would have been,” he says as he climbs over you. “So perfect, just for me…”
You like the weight of him on top of you. He’s careful not to squish you, but it feels so warm and solid. There’s a shiver up your spine as he touches you, as this coat and shirt brush against your breasts. You go to card your fingers through his hair and accidentally brush against the base of one of his ears and you can see the physical reaction, the little tremors of pleasure, the moan of an ecstasy promised.
“Okay?” you ask gently, doing it again.
Alastor nods quickly. “Yes, don’t stop. Don’t ever stop.”
You played with his ear while his tongue, lips, and teeth made their way across your throat and neck. The higher you went, the more aggressive he got, leaving little nips and bites everywhere.
You push him when you decide more clothes have to come off—his in particular. He looks confused for a half-second before you’re carefully removing his coat. You place it carefully on a chair near the bed, but almost rip the shirt off of him.
He gives a little huff of laughter. “Eager, are we darling?”
“Oh, you have no idea,” you say, hauling him in to kiss him again.
You love the feeling of your bare chests pressed together. Alastor’s breathing starts to come more quickly than before.
It’s you going after his neck, this time. You can hear something strangled in his throat, the vibrations of it against your lips. “You don’t have to hide anything from me.”
“Forgive me, darling. I am new to this.”
“Is it the very first time?”
He hums. “Technically no. Once, when I was a teenager, a very long time ago. I barely remember it at all, but I know it was nothing like this.”
You smile against his neck and nuzzle softly. “Doesn’t matter, you’ll know what to do.”
“I have every confidence in us both. We know each other on a professional and emotional level of intimacy, I doubt physical intimacy will be the thing that does us in.”
“It may be a bit early days, but I hope nothing ever does,” you say.
He cradles the back of your head to keep your lips close to his neck. He huffs. “Early days, my ass. If I was not sure about you I would not have started anything. If any part of you is unsure, I will make it sure. I promise that I won’t be a regret.”
You kiss your way down the side of his neck. “Lucifer would have been a regret. You will not be.”
He huffs. “As gratifying as that is to hear, please do not mention the circus freak during physical intimacy ever again. Or ever again in general, if possible.”
You laugh softly and hold him close. “I’ll never mention him in this context ever again, I promise.”
“I am much obliged, my love.” Alastor tugs at the jeans you’re wearing, but, having no experience with such garments, he doesn’t seem to realise they have to be unzipped first.
You reach between your bodies to help him out.
“Such complicated garments,” he says beneath his breath.
“No more complicated than yours! Your trousers unzip too, don’t they?” you ask.
“It is called a double standard, darling, and as per usual, unfortunately for you, it works out in my favour.” Alastor gets you down to your underwear and plays with the elastic waistband. “I would like to make something abundantly clear to you, darling. I will give you this one last chance.”
“For what?” you ask, kissing down his neck, the tip of his ear between your fingers. You feel it twitch.
“No, no, stop that for a moment, darling,” he says, so you do. When you’ve stopped and he’s got you looking at him again, he continues. “For just a moment, while you listen to this. I am telling you right now that you are reaching the point of no return. Once I have taken you, you will belong to me for eternity. That is not a hyperbole, it is reality. I will never allow you to leave me. Along with that promise, I promise to keep you safe, always, just as I am now, even if it means temporarily being away from me. I promise to love you. I promise you will want for nothing; everything that is in my power to give you, which is exhaustive and far-reaching, any little want or need you have, I will give it to you.”
You smile at him. “I don’t have as much to offer, but I’ll be the best damn radio engineer, the best damn brisket-maker, the best damn friend, and the best damn…”
“Mate,” he supplies.
“The best damn mate, I’ll be that,” you promise.
“You accept?” Alastor asks, and when you nod, he kisses you hard. “You are perfect. So good. And you understand? Completely? You have no doubts? Because there will be no other appropriate time to feel them. This is a permanent arrangement that you should not take lightly.”
“Trying to talk me out of it?”
“Trying not to be a regret,” he says, and it makes your expression warm.
“You aren’t and you won’t be,” you promise. “You were the answer to all the questions I didn’t know I was asking of myself from the moment I met you. I didn’t know, but it was always there, and now, like…I don’t know how to describe it. There’s not a lot of blood flowing to my brain, you know.”
He chuckles once and nods. “Then I will not ask you again. It is settled now, is it?”
“It is.”
“Good.” Alastor hooks his thumb into the elastic of your underwear indelicately and pulls them down and off your body.
You don’t even know how many naked people Alastor has seen. It’s possible he hasn’t seen another person naked since the first time with someone, so many years ago. He seems to know exactly what he’s doing, though.
“Well, now that the matter is settled.” Alastor lifts you up and places your head on a pillow. “There is something I have wanted to do since I met you. It was a strange craving, something that should have warned me of what was to come.”
“What’s the strange craving?” you ask, but rather than answer verbally he rolls his tongue between your leg, right against your clit, and you moan rather loudly with surprise.
Alastor laughs quietly to himself. “Enjoying yourself, darling?”
“Ohhhh God,” was all you could manage.
He licks your clit again before his tongue dips inside you, and when it does, Alastor elongates it—this shocks you, causes a gasp and a full-body shiver. You never thought such a thing was possible, and it’s certainly…a new experience. He rubs at your clit with his thumb while his tongue works inside you. He keeps your legs apart with his broad shoulders, tongue massaging against your walls until he reaches a spot that makes you scream. He laughs softly against your flesh and you’re panting now.
“Alastor…” Your legs tense up around him, muscles straining. He’s moaning against you as he works your body like he owns it, and maybe he does now. Your thighs tense around him and you…you’re getting louder.
“Is there something you can do about the noise?” you ask, even though you hate stopping him.
He keeps rubbing your clit while he speaks. “I can. But I will not. Louder.”
Alastor goes right back to it, his tongue working you hard, and he forces you to get louder just from the way his tongue moves against your walls.
“Oh, fuck…Oh, Al, don’t stop, please don’t stop…yeah…yeah, like that, like that…” Your breath comes in harder and harder, faster and faster, until you’re screaming, until your thighs are aching, until your pussy is so overstimulated that he pulls back with an enormous grin on his face.
He sucks one of your nipples into his mouth, but mercifully only briefly. “Tell me when I can take you.”
“Just a moment,” you pant. “Not a long wait, just a few minutes.”
“Very good,” Alastor says. “I’ll take other pleasure from other parts of your body in the meantime then, darling.”
“Yeah,” you whisper. “You do that, Al. Fucking hell.”
His tongue swirls along your nipple. “Yes darling?”
“You really took that one from the soul,” you say with a soft, shaky laugh. You nudge his shoulder. “Okay. I’m ready.”
“You’re sure?”
You nod a few times. “Yeah, yeah. Ready to go.”
You press your back down against the blankets, your head flat against the pillow. Alastor kneels between your knees and shoves them far apart, making plenty of room for himself. You’re silently grateful that he still seems to know exactly what to do—you’d gladly teach him if you had to, but it was so much better this way. He takes himself in hand and rubs the head of his cock from your clit and down, watches your muscles involuntarily jump slightly, a wide smirk on his face. Out of the corner of your eye, you see his shadow cast upon the wall, the elongated horns, that starving grin.
“I see you’ve noticed him,” Alastor says, entering you all at once. “Keep your eyes on me, dear. Pay him no mind.”
“You consider him separate from you?” you ask, your body adjusting to the size of him easily.
Alastor, however, does not seem to be having such an easy go of things. There is a look of concentration on his face, his lip between his teeth. It takes a moment for him to reply. “I consider him an echo of me. I’ll warn you now, I do not know how conversational I will be from this point on.”
“All the same,” you wink at him. “It’s not your conversation I’m after at the moment.”
It takes almost no time at all to get loud for him again, but this time it wasn’t just you being pleasured. This was a new world for Alastor and he was lost in it, captive to it. His hands grip at your hips as he fucks you harder and harder, the mattress shaking beneath you. Soon the headboard smacks against the wall and you thank God there’s no one on the other side.
“Al!” You hook one knee around his waist. “Al, please, deeper.”
He grabs your other knee and pulls it around him so he can get a better angle. He moves to whisper in your ear. “You feel so soft inside, like velvet. So warm, so hot…like that little pop of heat when you stand with your back to a fireplace…”
You moan loudly, feeling yourself get wetter and wetter around him, the sound slick and obscene. You can hear him curse, how his hips snap faster and faster until he finally spills his seed in you, fucking you through it.
Alastor’s damp forehead connects with your shoulder and you can feel his breath coming harsh against it. His hands soften their hard grip on your thighs and fall away, moving up to your waist, your ribs, one thumb against your nipple.
You play with his hair, with one of his ears, but it doesn’t seem to rile him up again, which was good, because you didn’t want to be told to stop. You turn your head against his and kiss his hair.
“Okay?” you ask after a while.
Upon hearing your voice, he lifts his head and then himself off of you. He crashes on his back beside you, his arm coming up around you, pulling you to him.
“I am so…so grateful that it was you,” he says. “I am grateful to have you. Forever. You and I will create a home next week, here at the hotel. It is well within my power to do. It can be any way you like. You should jot down ideas while you’re at Rosie’s.”
You groan. “I have to go back to Rosie’s, don’t I?”
“Yes, my lovely,” he says. “You will still reside at Rosie’s for the duration of this week until the Extermination is through and we are free to do as we please. We do not have to go straight back into radio. Maybe…we take some time to ourselves. It will be well-earned.”
“You’re going to need a break in general,” you say, pushing sweat-slicked hair out of his eyes. “You’re doing so much for all of us. I can’t believe you’re going to kill Adam.”
“Believe it, my love,” he says softly. “Believe me. This is our future.”
“I do believe you. I trust you,” you say. “And I’m sorry for being so bratty about being sent away. I am effectively useless in any type of fight scenario. I would hold everyone back.”
“You would sacrifice yourself too easily. I never said those things to hurt you, I said them because I feared what would happen to you.”
“I know,” you whisper. “I know.”
#alastor x reader#alastor x you#alastor imagines#hazbin alastor#alastor#hazbin hotel#alastor smut#hazbin hotel smut#hazbin alastor x you#hazbin alastor x reader#hazbin hotel fanfiction#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin alastor smut#hazbin hotel fanfic#hazbin hotel imagines
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thinking about the kamikou festival event again and how it conveys the tone and atmosphere of the school while showing the constant transmisogyny microaggressions mizuki lives with every day so well, and this phone call with an drives me insane bc even though an is genuinely well-meaning and is trying to ensure that mizuki knows that today is a safe day for her to come to school due to the circumstances of the festival, the way she words this is very discomforting bc she's basically saying "nobody is going to notice that you're dressed as a girl today bc everyone is wearing wacky outfits!" which carries the unfortunate implication that the way mizuki presents herself is equally wacky in a way that reinforces everything ppl say about her, but this isn't easy for her to push back against bc she doesn't have a good enough 'excuse' to do so when this is one of the few ppl who go out of their way to accommodate her even if they don't fully get it? it's thoughtful of an to want to reassure her but also it's another little thing that others fail to understand. she's trying to be kind but even then mizuki feels somewhat pushed into a corner. she's very bad at actively saying No. and an has removed her ability to misdirect here bc an is speaking with ambiguity.
mizuki also being too anxious about the idea of changing her clothes in school bc she's terrified of the possibility of being caught and thus having her body perceived by others... that's also another reason she'd hate being at school. gym and changing for it … i'd wager mizuki skips almost every gym class bc she can't stand the idea of being forced to change amidst boys, but she's also not allowed into the girls' locker room… literally only has the option to go to the roof if she wants to change. she's so hyper cognizant of her body and being seen … and the worst part is, she likes to be seen under her own circumstances and control (which is one of the many reasons she's very passionate abt fashion, and a lot of trans ppl in fiction tend to have an attachment to fashion and styling which makes a lot of sense bc of the element of control over one's appearance and making a self one can love). she really does. it just … happens that she knows she has so little control.
i've read the vbs main story (and a bit of their events but i need to continue whoops) and this makes me appreciate mizuki's brief interaction with kohane and an here more, bc it's obvious in this moment that kohane is just being her usual self—anxious around other ppl she's not familiar with and this is something she wants to improve upon (which as far as i can tell is the conceit of her character arc as an underdog of sorts compared to the others in her group). but mizuki assumes that she has to be uncomfortable with her specifically (presumably due to her transness) bc of her experiences, so she immediately feels bad about 'taking up space' and decides to make up an excuse to get away from the situation to give kohane the chance to comfortably hang out with her friend. and the fact that mizuki goes out of her way to say that she's going to find a place to hide alone is interesting bc the way it's framed it doesn't sound like it means much, but it feels deliberate on her part, like she wants an to know... mizuki's internal world and where we see she has internal bias and how she blames herself or assumes she herself is the problem if she can't make others comfortable, and she takes so much upon herself all the time bc she's used to constant microaggressions and either can't say how she truly feels or has to divest what she feels from its context to make it palatable. but of course kohane is not transphobic, she is someone who has trouble socializing with strangers bc of her own anxiety that has nothing to do with mizuki herself, but mizuki doesn't have access to this perspective like the reader so it's easy for her to assume that she's the problem. it's paranoia but it's understandable considering how she's treated by almost everyone...
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✩‧₊˚ Redacted HC’s ✩‧
I’ve been pretty shit at writing and posting this past year, which is crappy because I enjoy it so I wanted to do something that was less pressure than writing fics but could still make people happy. I’ve put every main redacted couple - plus a few extras - on a spin wheel and will be writing a long list of HC’s each day depending on who I get :)
Anyways, Part 1: Lasko and Dear
Dear loves thrifting but they didn’t want to take Lasko with them at first in case he found something they wanted, before they did. Now they borrow each others clothes so it wouldn’t matter anyway.
When they eventually took him he spent the entire time trying to find things they liked.
Dear has two toned hair
Lasko has never stopped thinking that dear is the coolest person to ever walk the earth, ever.
Sometimes dear wears colour contacts for fun
Both of them have a pocket watch on a chain
For their first anniversary Dear bought Lasko a locket, with a picture of the entire Damn Squad in it.
He added a photo of them to the other side
Dear has pet rats, they take such good care of them and their cage is huge
Lasko was slightly weary at first but he warmed up to them pretty well
Dear is very good at fixing things.
One of the first times they went to his apartment, his Ac broke. Dear just calmly listened to his apologetic rant about it before asking where the toolbox was.
Dear has tattoos behind their ears
Lasko is very good at saving but he’s not tight and always tries to pay for the whole table.
Very rarely has he succeeded
Dear has a collection of paper boy hats.
Lasko wears earmuffs when it’s cold because he always gets earaches
Dear has curled their hair with coke cans before
They love old black and white movies
Lasko likes really crappy b-movies
Can’t be let down if you know it’s going to be bad before it starts
Dear can keep up very well with Damien’s academic discussions and sometimes debates him just for the sake of it. Damien enjoys the challenge.
Dear is not the biggest Christmas enjoyer but this year they’re looking forward to it.
Lasko has booked a couple of Christmas markets for them
Dear HATES the idea of a cruise. Not because of the ocean but because they can’t get off the boat once it sets off.
Lasko always takes those little pots of jam and the little shampoo/conditioner bottles whenever he goes to a hotel
Neither of them can ice skate well whatsoever
Lasko has and will continue to use those little penguins meant for children. Dear finds it fucking hilarious all while they’re clinging to the side of the rink themselves
They share grandpa jumpers
When they first started dating, dear would pretend to forget their lanyard so that lasko would have to go down and let them in.
They both wear lots of rings and love playing with each others hands
Lasko used to wear those fake glasses from Claire’s
Dear is so casually flirty with Lasko that he thought it was just their personality at first
That’s why they eventually just had to go into his office and straight up ask him out
Dear kisses Lasko’s nose often, especially when they’re saying goodbye to each other or he’s severely overthinking
Dear really enjoys those mugs that change colour when you put hot water in them
Lasko has an entire cupboard dedicated to board games
Dear was delighted
Dear reads random niche comics and webtoons
And they have a lot of figurines
Lasko is an unsweetened oat milk enjoyer!!
Dear inhales food like it’s nobody’s business
It doesn’t last five minutes on their plate
They also never get indigestion
Their go-to cocktail is an old fashioned
Lasko hates it
Dear will simply repeat what Lasko says in a teasing tone to fluster him
Or they’ll just randomly start acting like the weirdest story is sexy.
‘And then he, he told me they’d have to charge me more for these stupid tires that I didn’t even ask for!’
‘ and what did you say? 😏
‘Well I- I told him,
‘ did you stick up for yourself? 😏😏
‘ well I told him I wasn’t going to pay for it’
*dear looking him up and down’
‘Good job, I don’t like it when other play dirty with you’
And they’re making out, Lasko doesn’t know how they do it they just have a way. It literally doesn’t even make sense.
Lasko’s hair grows incredibly quick. He shaves ALOT.
His skins is also so beautiful, it’s so soft and clear and glowy.
Dear has acne scars and they do little skincare nights together but Lasko thinks they’re HOT AS FUCK
Okay that’s all, also my proof that I got these guys first
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wow, this was one hell of a ride
— plot; my god, this was so good and wrapped up things beautifully. i love how they both fell in love with each other in different ways. like so different and maybe the timings were off but oh my god, they both love each other the same. the scene with drunk oc, oh my fucking god. i can't believe how beautifully you portrayed such intense emotions and events. your talent?? omfg. and oh pls, your smut is literally the best. and i also love that you had the courage to not only write this but share this. i respect that so much and esp that this fic was a healing piece for you. i hope you know that this has been as healing for me too. and ik u said these characters are not meant to be likeable but they're so realistic and raw that i just can't help but like them. and unless and until you've been there or witness someone close to you act like this, you won't understand just how painful and uncontrollable it is. i love this so much, and i will forever remember this story <3
— oc; fuck wonwoo, i want HER. oh god, she's so adorable and sweet? i literally love your descriptions of her, they were simply the best. and god, she's so naive as well, easily believing those around her, wearing her heart on her sleeve and not being afraid to feel things? that is braveness to me. such a beautiful portrayal of raw human emotions and flaws. that one para describing her made me melt. im afraid i wont find characters as realistic as this anywhere else. her being hopelessly in love with wonwoo from the very first fucking hits home too. the doubts, her still wanting to believe in him, being down bad for him. and i can see glimpses of you in her lol, i just love her characterization so much.
— wonwoo; the most deserved redemption. i was very doubtful on how he was gonna achieve her forgiveness, but he fucking proved himself. where do i find this man irl. and the para describing him realising his feelings? oh fuck. it was so beautiful. and im glad that he was the one for her. his character is beautifully portrayed too. when he confessed his feelings?? and the way he was trying to make it up even though he was still cocky lmao. and him and his nerdy glasses and zero social skills in the new school, lol. the fact he put down his walls for her and allowed her to see him for his true self 😣 god, his possessiveness too? that makes him so fucking real. it's so hot in fiction, but irl, i'd rather die lmao. but oh yes, wonwoo fucking won me over in this one and really got his green card.
— seokmin; oh my god. ok so, controversial opinion maybe, but i feel sorry for him. well yes, he did try to manipulate her. which is very very bad, but🧍♀️i understand where his feelings root from. i dont support the way he let his emotions control him but i dont find fault with the feelings themselves. and i wish nothing but the best for him. him saying that he was in love with her the same way she was with wonwoo fucking hurt. and the fact they've been friends for longer, i wanna cry. sometimes, ppl just do stupid, bad things but that doesn't mean they're bad. and i cannot and will not hate him.
— the friends; i rly rly love that we explored more friendship dynamics in this part!! i absolutely loved all of them and their scenes lol. whether it was leigh andd jeonghan flirting or them all agreeing wonwoo is an asshole. and they're realistic as well!! them not believing her when she said he has changed and giving her a side-eye, i got irl flashbacks lmao. they're so lovely.
— annotations;
This past week was filled with more joy than you’ve had in a long time.
ngl, that must feel so relieving
“Oh please, Kalia. You act like I didn’t see you and Mingyu practically eating each other's faces off in the library yesterday, ” June huffs, shooting daggers at the both of them while peeling away the pistachio shells for her drunken boyfriend.
I love the friend group
It seemed so simple for your friends to find someone who truly loved them, and wasn’t afraid to show it.
ouch
Reminders of all your missed opportunities left a bitter taste in your mouth, the alcohol on your tongue sweet in comparison.
tsk tsk, that must fucking hurt
“I thought you were dating Wownoo?” Lynne asks, and you couldn’t help but laugh at your pitiful situation.
uh…… no. fuck all of them think that
There was guilt gnawing at your insides. You didn’t want this to be one of those talks where you delve into the intricacies of your peculiar friendship with Wonwoo.
aww, poor girl. i feel so bad for her
There's a moment of silence amongst the rest of your friends at the table, before they all burst out laughing before repeating Leigh’s words. “Wonwoo’s an asshole!” They all say wholeheartedly in unison.
Lmfao asdrfsgzkfts
The reassurance that your friends had given you should’ve been worth the pain of cutting Wonwoo off.
Friends like this >>>
No matter how distracted you attempt to make yourself, he still floods your every waking thought.
sigh, i dont blame her
“Well, there’s only one thing we can do,” he shakes his head, reaching for the remote on the coffee table. We’re going to binge-watch this thing until you're caught up.”
he’s adorable but i have no fucking clue what his intentions are
“You left your phone on the counter, by the way,” He mentions before placing it on the coffee table.
…. nvm
Not used to the proximity between you and him, you're thankful the increased volume drowned out the pitter-patter of your heartbeat.
deja vu is hitting hard
“Yeah, I know, but there’s a bunch of attractive villains, like Killmonger from Black Panther,” you shrug, but Seokmin looks at you like you had just insulted his entire bloodline with your statement.
… i see a resemblance irl, honey.
Heat radiated off your face, and your timid expression would’ve been visible if Seokmin’s back wasn’t facing you. You hadn’t realized how well Seokmin knew you.
i am very uncomfy rn
Had you known that ignoring him would lead to an outburst of unrelenting anger, you wouldn’t have done so in the first place. Even when this cologne hangs in the still air of your apartment, you yearn for his presence. Even when you unleashed your fury at him, kicking him out with no remorse, you still yearn for his touch.
im .. this is so .. wow .. no words ..
Horrified by the sight of your phone screen, you don’t remember blocking him in the first place. Wracking your brain, you’re trying to think of all the instances where you had been drunk or high enough to even do so, but nothing comes to mind. If you didn’t block him, then who did?
gurl, asdfghjkl SEOKMIN DID
Wonwoo’s text brings a swell of comfort within you. As much as you hate what he did, you could never bring yourself to hate him.
true, so true
There’s deliberate fervour behind your actions, causing Seokmin to groan in surprise. Rough palms gripping your waist, he matches your energy.
this was lowkey so hot
Practically jumping out of his lap, you unlock your phone as if you weren’t just making out with Seokmin, to discover yet another text from Wonwoo.
smh, girl at least be subtle abt it
Only a fool would be swooning over his visible cry out for attention, and a fool you were. Wonwoo’s claws have sunk so deep into you, that you can’t even kiss someone without him interrupting. It's like he knew what you were doing without even seeing you.
asdfghjkl, she’s down bad
The burn at the back of your throat intensified as awareness sunk into your whole being. Seokmin was under the guise of a doting friend while you were in your feelings for Wonwoo. Pretending to be your knight in shining armour while you were in a vulnerable state. How could you be so naive?
ouch, that fucking hurts though i saw it coming miles away
“I hope so, considering you had gone on my phone behind my back and blocked his contact.”
FUCKING POP OFFFFF, OOHHH she’s fiesty omgggg
“I may be in love with you just as much as you are with Wonwoo, but at least I’m not dumb enough to go back to someone who obviously doesn’t give a shit about me. Your life will get easier when you stop being an idiot and start seeing how bad he is for you.”
oh fuck, nvm. I feel bad for him wtf omg. I cannot with this rollercoaster of emotions. Honestly, good for seokmin.
Everything would be so simple if it were Seokmin instead, and you acknowledge that. But your heart didn’t seek out his touch the way it did with Wonwoo.
sigh, this is so complicated but so realistic. a punch in the gut
Seokmin let his feelings get in the way of what could’ve been the start of something good. If only he hadn’t done what he did, maybe if he had just given you more time to heal, things between the two of you would be different. Although the friendship with Seokmin had turned sour, he still deserves someone who would love him unconditionally, it just wasn’t you.
so so true. god damn, these characters are so humane and realistic, i gotta give it to you. and truly wish the best for seokmin
You also cannot deny how much you still miss him.
i miss him too (a man i have never met in my life 😔)
[darling <3: you were right about seokmin]
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HE SAVED HER DARLING ON HIS PHONE RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
[darling <3: 👍]
Lmfaoooo, im sorry but this is so funny to me
Leigh giggles at how Jeonghan takes every opportunity to flirt with him but agrees to his wager anyway. “What does a kiss have to do with any of this?” “Nothing, I just wanted to give you one,” Jeonghan shrugs.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH—ok i’ll stop now, they’re so cute
“Maybe if you hadn’t been such a manipulative bitch, she wouldn’t have come back running to me,” Wonwoo smirks, the realization in Seokmin’s eyes is nothing but confirmation that he struck a nerve.
you idiot, omfg i did not like his sentence phrashing
No one deserves to have you as much as he did.
oh rly? well you have A LOT to prove abt that
The feathery breath you let out almost causes Wonwoo to forget what he’s meant to be doing. Enamoured by your soft pink lips and how the heat on your cheeks intensifies with each passing moment. He simply can’t take his eyes off you.
im just a man 🧍♀️
With his experience, it doesn’t take much for you to be perched right back into his palm. You’re a woman after all.
istfg, wonwoo, his self confidence is through the roof. I wish i had 1/10th of it lol
He chuckles at your meek countenance, you’ve always been the type to procrastinate.
i am, at the moment, procrastinating :))
Allowing himself to take a glance at you before interlocking his fingers with yours, rubbing soothing circles along your delicate skin.
GRRRR RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH sigh, i love them
Shoulders stiffening at the sight, Wonwoo really can’t stay. He might even combust into a million pieces before he can get to his car.
you horn dog 🫵
As you turn around, Wonwoo almost lets out a strained groan. He had been lucky enough to cover it up with a cough.
lmfaooo
A rough palm is placed delicately against the exposed skin of your waist. You’re so warm. Wonwoo’s brain short circuits and he almost forgets what he’s actually meant to do.
im actually going feral atp
Sensitive to the sad things in life yet ardent towards the things you are passionate about. You have always been a softer soul, a soul that feels everything without a care in the world. At the same time, you are a whirlwind of emotions, and different colours of sensibilities, it’s your greatest strength but also your weakness. Wonwoo admires that about you. Never afraid to feel, never afraid to wear your heart on your sleeve. Everything he isn't.
ok brb im gonna cry–she’s so sweet and so naive omggg. i love her so much
Falling in love with you was gradual.
im gonna start bawling, omfgggggg ahhhhh
In the same way, the tides along the shore would slowly pull the sand back into the ocean. In the same way, the seasons changed from summer to winter. Wonwoo’s love for you is like autumn leaves. Shades of green morph into the familiar, comforting, yellow, red, and brown. Their descent from their branches slowed, dwindling with the breeze before they ultimately hit the ground. Before he knew it, autumn had begun. Before he knew it, he was in love.
this is so beautiful, the differences between how they fell for each other ahhh 🤌
Wonwoo ached to see you again. To be close to you, with your scent filling his nostrils, your warmth engulfing him, he couldn’t stop thinking about you.
wow, someone’s in love
“Like? I don’t just like her. I’m in love with her.”
there it is
“Okay, you’ve convinced me, but you better not fuck it up. I won’t punch you but I know Kalia would,” Mingyu shrugs, and he’s right. Kalia would beat him up.
i love the friend grp
“Seems like everyone does. Seokmin cares a little too much,” Wonwoo huffs, thinking back to what you had told him the last time he saw you.
lmao, i think he’s in love with seokmin than her lmao. he keeps mentioning him even in his thoughts loll
“I’m so screwed. I can’t seem to properly memorize the theories, especially the one about Piaget’s stages. It keeps getting mixed up in my head,” you mutter in between bites.
damn she’s a psych major
Despite the reconciliation between you and Wonwoo, you still find yourself doubting his actions. Did he want to change for the sake of your friendship? Or was he only putting effort knowing you had almost slipped through his fingertips?
i was thinking the same
Pulling out your phone from her purse, and bringing the screen to your face. You widen your eyes, moving your head closer to the camera. A lopsided smile sneaks its way onto your lips as it unlocks.
move over, wonwoo, my turn. WHY IS SHE SO FRICKING ADORBALE IME ATIGN MY FISTI5JRG
“Excuse me! I’m waiting for my Wonwoo to come and pick me up,” you squeak, slapping the chest of whoever is trying to take you away from your friends.
fuck wonwoo, i want HER
“Your Wonwoo?” A familiar voice has you stopping in your tracks.
RAHHHHHHHHHHH 🦅
“My Wonwoo.”
fuck, this is way too cute ahhhhhh
How weird is it that a Wonwoo look-alike exists?
dies this is way too cute for me
Slapping his hand away, you’re offended at how endeared he is with you. The only thing on your mind was the softness of your comforter and the warm mint tea that you knew you were going to have later.
where do i find this girl irl, i dont even want wonwoo
“You know, I get really scared driving at night. I think I need you to hold my hand.”
move over, wonwoo. this is my turn!!
Fake Wonwoo has nice hands.
asdfghjkl
Would this be what it would be like if Wonwoo were finally yours?
🥺 im crying
“Real or fake, whatever you are or whatever this moment is. I’m still in love with you. I hate that I can’t tell you this without feeling scared or ashamed. I’ve loved you since the moment you came into class with your big nerdy glasses. I’ve loved you since you came back for a senior year when you had everyone’s attention on you. And I’ve loved you even when you were in love with someone else.” “I’ve loved you during everything we’ve been through together. Even when I chose to ignore you, I woke up every morning with you still on my mind. It was hard, and I don’t know why I couldn’t let go of my feelings for you but a part of me was always hoping that one day you would feel the same way.”
im fucking bawling
“What I’m trying to say is that I’m in love with you. I’m sorry it took so long for me to realize that it was you all along. I don’t know why I never admitted it to myself, but you’ve been in front of me this whole time.”
my eyes r swollen. he fucking said it, HE SAID IT
“Just promise me you’ll love me tomorrow too,” he chokes out.
“I’ll love you even if there is no tomorrow.”
Oh my fucking god 🥺🥺🥺🥺
His black hair was long and covered his forehead, glasses were thick and large-framed. Wonwoo was a breath of fresh air from the other boys at your school. Unlike the rest of them, he was more reserved and didn’t talk much. His silence intrigued you.
fetus wonwoo 🥺
[wons: ok]
His reaction to the nickname lmfaoo
But you felt daring in that moment, allowing yourself to rest your head against his shoulder. Wonwoo stiffened slightly at your proximity but didn’t budge.
🧍i need a nerd bf rn
“Yeah. At least then we have more to talk about,” he specified.
ahhhhhhhhhhh
Instead, Wonwoo wrapped his arm around your shoulder pulling you closer to him.
im so done, I NEED A NERD BF RN
Wonwoo took over every crevice of your mind, his scent, his touch, even if it was a mere hand on your shoulders, you didn’t want to go a day without him.
and that’s how you know she’s beyond being saved.
You almost scoff at how cheesy you sounded in your dream. What kind of fool speaks this articulate after countless shots of tequila?
mam, that did happen and yes, YOU spoke like that after downing tequila
Except for the dildo that June gifted you for your birthday last year.
lmfao??? i got reminded of that scene in everything everywhere all at once
Opening up your drawer you carefully take out the pink sparkly dildo that was still left in its packaging, gripping it tightly as you burst through the door.
ASSESVRTJNOE4UGJSWLE3MN IM DDYING LMAOO
Only for your sight to befall an extremely muscular and shirtless Wonwoo.
stopping my manic laughter to appreciate his muscles. aight back to the shenanigans
“Ow! What the fuck?” Wonwoo grunts, turning around to see your smaller frame gripping a bright pink dildo.
GRRRRRR LMAOOOOOOOOO
“I love you too,” the words spill out of your mouth effortlessly, like you were meant to tell him all along.
your honor, my client is down bad
Grinning down at you, Wonwoo places a gentle kiss on your lips. His large hands cupping your face as he does so.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THEY KISSED, GENTLE KISS OH MY GOD
All while you’re sitting there eating strips of bacon and a couple of eggs.
ASDFGHJKL, IM SOBBING I LOVE DOMESTICITY SO MUCH. *inserts that gif of ebichu crying*
“I just want to be yours, Wonwoo.” you sigh, placing your plate on the coffee table.
AHHHHH, holy shit, she’s 6 feet underground
Lazy Sunday Morning. Your favourite.
All i can think of is my mans joshua, im sorry anna
“Be my girlfriend. Be mine, please,” Wonwoo speaks in hushed tones, his lips searing against the shell of your ear.
YES YES YES, this is so hot
While his hand massages into the fat, you kiss up his neck while rubbing yourself against his clothed cock. His voice becomes strained, attempting to cover up the sounds of pleasure he’s emitting with a cough.
ANNA, HOW DARE U SAY U CANT WRITE SMUT IDFDSHDDDJHCNB
The only thing he was looking forward to was the look on Seokmin’s face once he saw that you were finally his.
just admit that ur in love with him
The absence of your touch irked him, but he let you go, not wanting to startle the rest of the group with his growing possessiveness.
i shudn’t like this …. why do i like this … but possessiveness in real life 😬
A hand is placed on his shoulder and he flinches away, he doesn’t want anyone but you touching him. It almost makes him want to throw up.
i love reserved men so much
“That’s never stopped me,” her voice lowers an octave in an attempt to sound seductive but Wonwoo feels nothing but repulsed by her very being.
i hate ppl like this
he knew he was in control either way.
😌
His. His darling.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCK I LOVE THIS
down your neck with the goal of leaving marks against your delicate skin.
i was so sleepy when reading this, i read it global warming against your delicate skin 😭 im so sorry lmao
Excitement courses through his veins, imagining all the fun he’s about to have with you.
fucking hell, he’s so hot
He doesn’t stop until he’s at the apex of your sex, glasses fogged while the bridge of his nose is rubbing against your skin.
fuck, his glasses???
🧍omfg, wonwoo domming made me feel …. 🥴
“Gonna breed this little cunt till you're stuffed full,” he groans, finally inserting his dick inside your heat.
At that moment, Wonwoo concludes that he doesn’t want anyone but you. For as long as he can, he wants to be the only one to fuck you, to give you orgasm after orgasm. Until you're spent and in and out of consciousness, he wants to be the only one who can make you feel this way.
“Answer it,” he speaks firmly.
“Bet you liked that huh? You like it when I show everyone that you’re mine?” Wonwoo emphasizes while he continues to push past your entrance.
Wonwoo’s muscular bicep wraps around your neck, placing you into a headlock.
“This pussy is fucking mine,” he growls, emphasizing his words with each thrust.
“Says the one who has a massive dildo in their drawer,”
lmao i love him
Not even the fresh air that breezed through his fingers or the scent of the salty water misting its way onto the shore while he visited his hometown could outweigh the feeling of tranquillity that he got when he was with you.
🥺🥺🥺 this is so–im biting my fist.
Everything had fallen into place, and for the first time since he was seventeen, he realized that the one person he was searching for was in front of him this whole time.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
🥺🥺 this is the most perfect way to end it fuck. omg
[wonwoo has changed your nickname to “darling <3”]
i feel so warm and fuzzy, im tearing up, omfg
In Front of Me (2)
cause i was blind to see that you were right in front of me ₊˚
⊹ pairing: jeon wonwoo x f.reader ⊹ genre: bestfriends to (?), angst, smut (R: 18+ mdni) ⊹ wordcount: 40.6k (part 1: here) (part 2)
⊹ summary: jeon wonwoo has spent most of his adolesence and early adult hood unable to understand why he can't seem to stay in a relationship for more than a few months. as his best friend, you allowed him to vent about his worries without judgment. so what if you're in love with him? your friendship with wonwoo meant more to you than having your feelings reciprocated. that is until you hit your breaking point, while wonwoo finally realizes what has been in front of him this whole time.
⊹ tags: non-idol!au, uni!au, unrequited love (for the most part), pining, toxic!wonwoo, toxic!reader, both in wonwoo and readers pov, questionable protagonists, mentions of other svt members, happy ending (?), emotionally constipated characters (wonwoo), flashbacks, slight seokmin x reader, a lot of emotions thrown everywhere. (smut and content warnings under the cut)
⊹ note: here is pt.2 i hope you like how this ended :) thank you for reading ♡ please leave a reblog, comment, or ask with your thoughts, i appreciate u !
⊹ masterlist, fic playlist.
⊹ smut tags: dry humping, kissing, fingering, penetrative sex, corruption kink, degradation, dom!wonwoo, brat!reader, virgin!reader,oral (f. receiving), creampie, exhibitionsm (?), slightly perv!wonwoo undertones, petnames (reader: darling, baby) (wonwoo: baby), big dick wonwoo, riding, headlock (this is a warning actly). ⊹ warnings: alcohol, reader is downbad for wonwoo, stalking, slut-shaming, evasions of privacy, if i missed anything lmk! cuz ik i did i just can't think of what hehe :p
act two, self control.
chapter one, before the fight.
The booth you sat in was far too cramped for your liking, yet there was a sense of relief that washed over you. Raval had been a go-to hang-out spot after all the tireless hours spent studying during the weekdays. The atmosphere was lively, your friends’ laughter drowning out most of your thoughts.
Tonight also marked the first time in your life that you could fully enjoy a night out with your friends. Without Wonwoo’s presence clouding your worries.
Despite his obvious plea for attention, you felt like you could finally breathe. The adjustment and decision to flat-out ignore him was difficult, but thanks to Seokmin it had become a little easier to bear over time. This past week was filled with more joy than you’ve had in a long time. And Seokmin had been extremely doting towards you throughout it all.
“Babe, can you pass the pistachios please?” Jun pouts, his cheeks red from his third glass of beer.
“Did you need me to peel them for you, baby?” June coos, lips curling into a cutesy tone.
With a quizzical expression, Mingyu turns to Kalia, trying not to laugh at the other couple's foolishness. The two share a look before Kalia fake gags, causing Mingyu to burst out laughing. It had almost gone unnoticed until Mingyu broke out into a fit of giggles, June glaring at him with an unamused expression.
Watching the whole scene unfold had you smiling to yourself, wondering if there would ever be a time when you got to have these cheesy moments with someone the way your friends did.
“Oh please, Kalia. You act like I didn’t see you and Mingyu practically eating each other's faces off in the library yesterday, ” June huffs, shooting daggers at the both of them while peeling away the pistachio shells for her drunken boyfriend.
“Hey! You said that no one would catch us.” Kalia slaps the back of Mingyu’s head, causing him to wince.
“First of all ouch, second of all, I didn’t know that anyone would go that far back into the library!” Mingyu defends himself.
“Actually, the two of us were trying to do the same thing, but we saw you and dipped,” Jun confesses in his drunken state, while he munches on the pistachios June had been feeding him.
“Ha! Take that June, you're just as bad as us, if not worse,” Kalia gibes, sticking her tongue out at June.
“Actually, all of you are equally as corny, end of discussion,” Leigh chirps, his eyes rolling as Lynne, his twin sister, cackles beside him. Both evidently fed up with the ‘who’s the cheesier couple’ argument.
Amidst all the bickering, you take a sip of your drink, eyes glimmering with admiration. It seemed so simple for your friends to find someone who truly loved them, and wasn’t afraid to show it.
Wonwoo had been at the forefront of your mind for so long that you had denied yourself anyone else. You had been so set on making Wonwoo your end goal when you could’ve found someone who would’ve treated you better. Reminders of all your missed opportunities left a bitter taste in your mouth, the alcohol on your tongue sweet in comparison.
“Something on your mind?” Lynne breaks you out of your thoughts.
With your glass pushed down onto the sticky bar table, you give her a crooked smile that feels less disingenuous than the previous smiles you have been producing these past few months.
“Kinda wondering when I’ll have something like those goofballs over there,” you chuckle bitterly, head motioning to the two girls fake arguing while their boyfriends sat there cluelessly.
“I thought you were dating Wownoo?” Lynne asks, and you couldn’t help but laugh at your pitiful situation.
His face flashes briefly within your mind, and you’d almost forgotten that you had chosen not to speak to him, for how long? You weren’t sure. It could be days or months, or until you’ve finally healed from your one-sided heartbreak.
“No… no. He and I were just close friends,” your tone is melancholic. Lynne’s worry is transparent as she squeezes your shoulder.
Desolation filled your senses regardless of the bar patrons' exuberant chatter. Your group of friends were all in their own worlds while you were troubled and inattentive. There was guilt gnawing at your insides. You didn’t want this to be one of those talks where you delve into the intricacies of your peculiar friendship with Wonwoo.
“And that's okay, too. I'm not sure what happened, but he’s an idiot if he can’t see what's right in front of him,” she affirmed as you sat there, relieved that she didn’t press the situation further.
“Tell me about it, it feels like everyone's been saying the same thing,” you mutter.
Overhearing your conversation, Lynne’s twin brother couldn’t help but jump in, “Wonwoo’s a dumbass.”
Lynne gives him a pointed look, but can’t help but laugh at her brother's antics. Feathery giggles leave your throat too, finding Leigh’s unexpected declaration amusing.
“Sorry, I had to put my two cents in, he kinda sucks! As a friend he’s okay I guess, but as a boyfriend, girl, you’re better off without him,” Leigh puts his hands up in defence, but there was truth behind his statement.
“True, I’ve seen what he’s done to some of the girls on campus, total—,” Lynne begins, only for her sentence to be cut off.
“Red flag,” Leigh finishes Lynne’s proclamation.
Twin telepathy, you assumed.
“Hey, I’ll cheers to that,” you shook your head with a chuckle, taking three shot glasses before topping them up with a bottle of tequila Mingyu had bought for the table.
“What! You guys are taking shots without us?” Jun whined before filling his glass with liquor.
The whole table's attention is on the three of you now, joining in on the rounds of shots going around. The clangour of glassware chimes throughout the carved-out space of the bar you and your friends had claimed for the night.
“Wonwoo’s an asshole!” Leigh blurted out loud before throwing back the alcohol in his cup.
There's a moment of silence amongst the rest of your friends at the table, before they all burst out laughing before repeating Leigh’s words.
“Wonwoo’s an asshole!” They all say wholeheartedly in unison.
The gleam in everyone’s eyes caused warmth to swell all over your body. Nothing could compare to moments like these, and you desperately hoped that the night wouldn’t end. The reassurance that your friends had given you should’ve been worth the pain of cutting Wonwoo off. Praying that their effort to cheer you up wouldn’t be wasted on foolish decisions you desperately wanted to make; the yearning for Wonwoo has only skyrocketed and it frightens you to the core.
No matter how distracted you attempt to make yourself, he still floods your every waking thought.
two.
Since your decision to ignore Wonwoo, Seokmin has been coming over to your place a lot more often. You can’t recollect when it started to happen, but you're not opposed to his company. It’s quite the opposite actually; if anything he’s made your days a lot brighter, keeping you distracted from your urge to text Wonwoo.
The time you spent with Seokmin mostly consisted of him trying to get you to finish the whole Harry Potter series with him. When you told him you’ve never seen the movies before, he had a comical look of shock painted over his face. Hands slapped against his cheeks, eyes wide they almost popped out of the sockets, type of comical.
“Not even the first movie?! Not even on Halloween during elementary school?” Seokmin gasps, hands on your shoulders, trying to gauge what you did and didn’t know about the infamous films.
“Yes! Not even when I was a kid, is it bad that I haven’t watched it?”
“It's not just bad, this is almost criminal,” Seokmin sighs, feigning distraught.
You chortle at his remark, baffled by how seriously passionate he is about Harry Potter, which ended almost ten years ago, you might add.
“Well, there’s only one thing we can do,” he shakes his head, reaching for the remote on the coffee table. We’re going to binge-watch this thing until you're caught up.”
“What? Isn’t that a bit much? There are like a bajillion movies,” you exasperate.
Not wanting to hear another complaint from you, Seokmin shushes you dramatically. His pointer finger was in front of your lips before you could get another word in.
“I'll get the snacks. You sit here and get comfy because you’re in for a ride,” Seokmin asserts before standing to grab food and drinks from your kitchen.
An audible sigh leaves your lips, arms crossed as you pull the blanket over yourself to “get comfy” just as Seokmin wanted.
A few minutes passed before Seokmin returned to the living room, a bowl of microwave popcorn perched on his side and two cans of soda cradled in his other arm.
“You left your phone on the counter, by the way,” He mentions before placing it on the coffee table.
“Oh! Thanks, I didn’t even realize,” you smile, shifting to make room for him on the couch.
“You ready for the greatest movie experience ever?” Seokmin beamed, plopping back into his seat beside you.
“Sure, but we can only watch the first two,” you bargained with him, knowing that if he had it his way, you two would be up till sunrise.
Seokmin rolled his eyes jokingly, pretending to be annoyed with your lack of enthusiasm. Despite his antics, he agrees with your compromise. The movie begins to play and you let yourself relax in his presence. A bowl of popcorn is shared between you two while he wraps his hand over your shoulder. Not used to the proximity between you and him, you're thankful the increased volume drowned out the pitter-patter of your heartbeat.
…
“Well that was a lot better than I expected,” you admit.
Although you were uncertain about watching the movies at first, you had acknowledged the hype around the Harry Potter franchise. Seokmin had caught all your facial expressions while watching, peering over to catch your reactions during all the major plot points. You had been so obviously absorbed in it that you didn’t realize he had been staring.
“I told you! It just gets better from here. The Goblet of Fire is my favourite, you’ll love it,” Seokmin marvels, wanting to indulge in his interests with you.
“Tom Riddle is kinda cute, I won’t lie.”
“But he’s evil…and you know he gets ugly anyways. He’s literally Voldemort!” Seokmin disputed with a stare of mild disgust.
“Yeah, I know, but there’s a bunch of attractive villains, like Killmonger from Black Panther,” you shrug, but Seokmin looks at you like you had just insulted his entire bloodline with your statement.
Giggling, you didn’t expect him to take your opinions so seriously.
“Fine. I won't say anything else. You go take your shower, and I’ll clean up,” he ushers you toward your room while holding the empty bowl in his hands.
“How did you know that I was gonna take a shower?” you ask with curiosity.
“I’ve known you for so long, you always take a shower before bed,” Seokmin explained nonchalantly.
Heat radiated off your face, and your timid expression would’ve been visible if Seokmin’s back wasn’t facing you. You hadn’t realized how well Seokmin knew you.
“Thanks for cleaning up, I won’t be long,” you give him a smile of gratitude before heading over to your bathroom.
The more time you spend with Seokmin, the more you regret falling for Wonwoo. Seokmin is kind and doting, and he never causes you to feel any worry. He is the prime example of home, reminiscent of a warm fire while snuggled up on the couch with a pile of blankets.
Seokmin feels safe. The safe choice, the smart choice.
Unfortunately, you were too foolish to have known sooner. Your irrevocable love for Wonwoo overshadowed all the possibilities of being with Seokmin.
A knock on your front door brings you out of your spiralling thoughts. But before you head over to open the door, Seokmin beats you to it.
“Minnie? Is someone at the door?” you call out from your bathroom, not bothering to leave.
“Yeah! Your neighbour just needed to borrow something,” Seokmin half yelled from where he stood.
There was a moment of doubt in your mind, why would your neighbour want to borrow something so late into the night? Instead of investigating further, you leave it to Seokmin to help them, too tired to talk to anyone else for the rest of the evening.
“Okay!” is all you say.
You turn on the shower, allowing the steam to congregate and relax your senses. As you step in, you grant the warm water the ability to wash away your conflicting thoughts about both Seokmin and Wonwoo.
after the fight.
“It’s time for you to go. I’m tired, Wonwoo.”
The bile in your throat stings, the corner of your eyes wet with tears. You didn’t expect Wonwoo to burst in here accusing you of things you wouldn’t dare do. There’s a familiar hollow feeling in your chest as you recollect how much of your heart you laid bare for him to witness.
Had you known that ignoring him would lead to an outburst of unrelenting anger, you wouldn’t have done so in the first place. Even when this cologne hangs in the still air of your apartment, you yearn for his presence. Even when you unleashed your fury at him, kicking him out with no remorse, you still yearn for his touch.
There hadn’t been many fights between the two of you, only enough to count on one hand. It would be petty arguments over stupid things. Arguments that would lead to one of you apologizing before the day was over. This fight seems different. It can’t be resolved with a quick ‘I’m sorry’.
Defeated and tired, you move to your bed. Your phone sits atop the dresser. Curious and wishing for Wonwoo to just return and apologize, you click his contact. You almost feel like you are in some fever dream, the words ‘you’ve blocked this number’ staring back at you in flashing red.
Horrified by the sight of your phone screen, you don’t remember blocking him in the first place. Wracking your brain, you’re trying to think of all the instances where you had been drunk or high enough to even do so, but nothing comes to mind. If you didn’t block him, then who did?
You unblock his contact as quickly as possible, not wanting to create even more distance between you, although it might be too late to rectify the situation. A few messages were sent shortly after the fight had gone down.
[2:55 a.m.] [wons <3: idk if you’ll receive this but i’m sorry darling. i mean it.] [wons <3: i didn’t mean what i said earlier. i was just so angry. when ure ready to talk, lmk.]
Wonwoo’s text brings a swell of comfort within you. As much as you hate what he did, you could never bring yourself to hate him.
three.
“You know, I’m kinda glad you’re here,” you professed.
The harrowed walls of your home became a lot more bearable now that you had someone other than yourself inside them. The entire place felt far too big for you, especially because you tend to sit alone with your thoughts too often.
Seokmin coming over to hang out was not part of your initial plan. But his unannounced visit wasn’t unwelcomed either. He was extremely talented in distracting you with his sporadic outbursts of energy and laughter. Seokmin made you feel quaint, almost as if he could be the ‘someone’ after everything you had been through with Wonwoo.
With crescent-shaped eyes that appeared when his smile broadened, Seokmin wrapped his arm tautly against your shoulder.
“I honestly just came over to check on how you were doing, after everything that happened, but I don’t mind staying for a while, I’d do anything if you asked.”
“Are you flirting with me, Lee Seokmin?”
Seokmin threw his head back with a hearty contagious laugh. Before you knew it, you were laughing along with him.
The voice in the back of your head hissed symphonies of how easier your life would’ve been if you had just fallen in love with Seokmin instead. No matter how many times you tried to unearth a flaw of his, nothing comes to mind. There were so many signs leading you toward him, and how perfect he would be for you. But your heart still belongs elsewhere, even after what has been said and done.
Seokmin’s eyes dimmed, “Would it be so bad if I was?”
Taken aback by his words, your mouth opens and closes, trying to figure out whether he’s joking or genuine about his statement.
“I-I guess not,” you mumble, watching the way his gaze shifts from your eyes down to your lips.
Holding your breath, you can’t deny the tension that the two of you had created. Bodies practically meshed together on the couch, you weren’t sure how you ended up in this position but if Seokmin was the answer to distracting you from the fight with Wonwoo, who were you to deny him?
“I really want to kiss you,” Seokmin confesses.
“I wouldn’t stop you if you did.”
Seokmin didn’t need much convincing after what you had professed. Swinging your legs over his lap, he grapples you into a position that has you straddling his thighs. The swiftness of his movements almost caused a yelp to leap out of your throat, but he steadied you before you could let out another noise.
With the faintest of touch, Seokmin places his lips over yours. Ever so cautious, ever so careful, he clearly wants to savour the moment. Despite his heedfulness, you were the exact opposite. You want it to be fast, you want him to be rough.
There’s deliberate fervour behind your actions, causing Seokmin to groan in surprise. Rough palms gripping your waist, he matches your energy. The world sinks into a deep void along with the cruel songstress who refused to let you neglect your feelings for Wonwoo.
Even though you have the desire to prolong your make-out with Seokmin, your phone buzzes against the plush cushions of your couch. Practically jumping out of his lap, you unlock your phone as if you weren’t just making out with Seokmin, to discover yet another text from Wonwoo.
Every time his contact appears on your screen, your heart can’t help but skip a beat. It angers you how easily enraptured you are by something so minuscule. Even after you had kicked him out of your house that night, you can’t deny his diligence and how desperate he is for forgiveness.
You almost wanted to curse him out for his audacity, but the other half wanted to give in and let him explain. Eyes glued to his messages, you find yourself reading them over and over again, your heart swollen with an aching desire to talk to him again.
[11:09 p.m.] [wons <3: hi. ik ur still mad but let me make it up to you. please?] [wons <3: i don’t know what i have to do to make u forgive me but just know i don’t want us to end on this note.] [wons <3: please darling, u mean so much to me, i don’t wanna lose u.] [wons <3: i can’t stand this. please, just give me a chance to make things right]
Only a fool would be swooning over his visible cry out for attention, and a fool you were. Wonwoo’s claws have sunk so deep into you, that you can’t even kiss someone without him interrupting. It's like he knew what you were doing without even seeing you.
“I thought you blocked him?” the inflection of disappointment apparent in Seokmin’s voice.
Plopping your phone back down on the sofa, your brain finally registers the words that Seokmin had just uttered. You know for a fact that it wasn’t you who blocked his contact, but how the hell did Seokmin know?
Unless he was the one to do so…
A moment of realization struck you like a bolt of lightning, and the confusion finally cleared by the slip of Seokmin’s tongue. Why would he block Wonwoo’s contact on your phone?
Attempting to recall when and where this could’ve happened, you remember the day you left your phone on the kitchen counter during the Harry Potter movie marathon. The burn at the back of your throat intensified as awareness sunk into your whole being. Seokmin was under the guise of a doting friend while you were in your feelings for Wonwoo. Pretending to be your knight in shining armour while you were in a vulnerable state. How could you be so naive?
Wonwoo had been trying to tell you the truth, but you foolishly snubbed all his warnings out of anger.
Nauseous and betrayed, you didn’t know that Seokmin would turn out to be the one to manipulate you, to sway your opinions to gain your time and affection. You’re so shaken up from your revelation that you almost forget who exactly is sitting right in front of you.
“I’m really sorry Seokmin, but that kiss. I wasn’t thinking straight,” you attempt to act calm, not wanting to escalate the situation.
“It’s okay, I understand. It's only been a week,” he shrugs with a rueful demeanour, “You’re still in love with him and there's not a lot I can do to change your mind.”
“You’re right, there isn’t,” you reply with certainty. “I've been in love with him for years, and that’s not going to change for a while.”
“I just want you to know I’ll be here when you’re ready.”
“I can’t do that to you knowing I still love him,” you disclose and hurt flashes across Seokmin’s eyes.
“I understand.”
“I hope so, considering you had gone on my phone behind my back and blocked his contact.”
Shock is the best way to describe Seokmin’s reaction. He probably hadn’t realized that you figured out where his true intentions lie. But now that it’s out in the open, you can’t help but stand your ground.
Seokmin doesn’t deserve to be in your presence right now, especially after he took advantage of your vulnerability.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Seokmin tries to respond nonchalantly, but his eyes frantically avoid your gaze.
“You know damn well what I’m talking about,” you grit, your knuckles were straining from how hard you gripped onto your phone. Displacing your anger before it was shot full throttle and onto Seokmin’s face.
“Fine. You caught me. But there wasn’t any other way for you to forget him if you kept in contact with him. Even if you weren’t explicitly answering his texts.”
Standing up and stalking over to your door, you open it to usher Seokmin out of the home.
“That’s for me to decide. Not you. Now please leave.”
Without much defiance, Seokmin leaves, evidently hurt by your anger towards him. The frown on his face deepened while he grabbed all his things, and walked out your door.
As he leaves, he utters his last words, clearly miffed by your decision to kick him out.
“I may be in love with you just as much as you are with Wonwoo, but at least I’m not dumb enough to go back to someone who obviously doesn’t give a shit about me. Your life will get easier when you stop being an idiot and start seeing how bad he is for you.”
…
The unsavoury memories of earlier had you deep in thought, especially after the statement Seokmin had made. He was supposed to be your safe space, but he ruined it with his need to cut Wonwoo out of your life for you. Yet there was clear wisdom to what he had said. Wonwoo only complicated your life and feelings further.
Everything would be so simple if it were Seokmin instead, and you acknowledge that. But your heart didn’t seek out his touch the way it did with Wonwoo.
Seokmin let his feelings get in the way of what could’ve been the start of something good. If only he hadn’t done what he did, maybe if he had just given you more time to heal, things between the two of you would be different. Although the friendship with Seokmin had turned sour, he still deserves someone who would love him unconditionally, it just wasn’t you.
Wonwoo was the person you truly wanted, and although the break and argument between you two were enlightening, you cannot deny how right he is about Seokmin.
You also cannot deny how much you still miss him.
Can’t Get You.
chapter one.
“I gave up so much for you, Wonwoo. I lost so much of myself trying to please you. But I give up. I was drowning in my love for you.”
You are an enigma inside Wonwoo’s mind, and it was the first time in a while that he had experienced deep regret and grief. Forcing himself into your home to accuse you all because of his resentment towards Seokmin, he couldn’t have been less irrational. And now he had to face the consequences of his actions.
Sleepless night after sleepless night, he had no way to make up for what he had done to you. Years of cluelessly assuming that you only ever saw him as a friend, of using you as a crutch for his anguish. He had been so unfair, and there's a sense of exasperation he cannot disenthrall.
Wonwoo is supposed to be your friend as much as you were his, but he dared to treat you as his therapist, his support system. If he hadn’t been so blind to your feelings, none of this would’ve happened. Maybe he would’ve been able to reciprocate your feelings earlier if he had known that you were in love with him this whole time.
The buzz of a notification illuminates his dim bedroom, the light of his screen creating shadows that harboured his contrition. He had half the mind to answer, but after what he had said to you that day, he knew it wasn’t going to be you.
Wonwoo decided to take a look anyway.
[12:09 a.m.]
[darling <3: you were right about seokmin]
[darling <3: that doesn’t mean i forgive u. i just thot id let u know]
With his heartbeat hammering inside his chest, Wonwoo couldn’t contain his elation. It’s been so long since he’d seen your name on his phone screen, and despite the context not being ideal, he decided to look at the brighter side.
Although he’s not sure what had gone down between you and Seokmin, Wonwoo couldn’t find it in himself to care. All he knows is that he was right to warn you, and he has a chance to have you all for himself once again. Without the worry of Seokmin interrupting his plans.
[12:10 a.m.]
[wons <3: i’ve missed you, darling]
[wons <3: i know i’ve been a bad friend in the past, but i want to show u that i can change. please]
[wons <3: i promise, i'm going to be better]
Desperation was never Wonwoo’s thing, but if it meant having you in his arms once again, then nothing else matters. If he’s perceived as pathetic for trying to gain your trust again, then so be it.
Eyes glued to his phone screen, he observes how your grey chat bubble appears and disappears again. The anticipation of what you’re going to say next has Wonwoo on the edge of his bed, wishing he could just peer into your mind, to catch a mere glimpse into what you’re thinking.
[12:14 a.m.] [darling <3: 👍]
There’s an immediate drop in Wonwoo’s smile, he’s never experienced you acting indifferent towards him. The feeling is so foreign he has no choice but to find some way to get rid of it. You had given a sliver of hope just by texting him, and that was all he needed. Wonwoo is your best friend, he knows you better than anyone, he knows you better than Seokmin.
Apathetic towards the lengths he may have to go to to bring you back into his life, Wonwoo is determined to make you forgive him. Even if it meant abandoning his pride or his ego, he didn’t care anymore. Everything else is meaningless if you’re not his.
two.
The next time Wonwoo is forced to be in a room with Seokmin is the day Jeonghan decides to have an impromptu study session in the library. Unbeknownst to him, the person he has grown to hate would be there too. The tension was increasingly palpable to the point that both Jeonghan and Leigh found it difficult to focus on their work.
“Why are you here?” Wonwoo queried with a scrutinizing gaze.
The sound of uncomfortable shuffling is pronounced within the long pause of Seokmin and Wonwoo’s staredown. And Jeonghan gives Leigh a look of curiosity with a hint of confusion. They were obviously under the impression that the two of them were good friends, especially because no one had a clue about what happened between them.
“Jeonghan invited me to study, why? Is it illegal for me to be here?” Seokmin quipped, evidently unamused by Wonwoo’s presence.
Wonwoo scoffs, chair legs scraping against the hardwood as he takes his seat.
“It should be.”
Seokmin huffs before crossing his arms over his chest, taking a guarded stance. Various textbooks cluttered around the table, long forgotten in favour of watching Seokmin and Wonwoo bicker.
“What’s up with those two?” Jeonghan whispers in Leigh’s ear, which the latter only shrugs in response.
Wonwoo and Seokmin were lost in their world of conflict, and neither paid attention to their two observers. They were both ready to pull out bowls of popcorn amid their studying, which seemed more entertaining than whatever they were reading earlier.
“Not sure. I bet you ten dollars it has something to do with you know who…,” Leigh whispers back, obviously amused by his friends' clear disdain for each other.
“I’ll bet you ten dollars and a kiss Wonwoo did something to piss off Seokmin,” Jeonghan challenges his deal.
Leigh giggles at how Jeonghan takes every opportunity to flirt with him but agrees to his wager anyway.
“What does a kiss have to do with any of this?”
“Nothing, I just wanted to give you one,” Jeonghan shrugs.
Their conversation is cut off by Seokmin’s need to curse out Wonwoo, standing up from the table only to poke his finger into the elder's chest.
“I hope you know that if you pursue her, you’ll only end up hurting her,” Seokmin accused, causing Wonwoo to flare with outrage.
Wonwoo isn’t pleased by Seokmin’s intrepid need to provoke him. From what you texted him the other day, it’s unmistakably clear that he has the upper hand. This means that Seokmin’s vexation is only a projection of the fact that his plan has gone awry.
“Maybe if you hadn’t been such a manipulative bitch, she wouldn’t have come back running to me,” Wonwoo smirks, the realization in Seokmin’s eyes is nothing but confirmation that he struck a nerve.
Seokmin is left baffled by Wonwoo’s statement, “You seriously cannot be talking right now.”
“Oh, but I am. I may have done wrong before, but at least I know how to get her back,” Wonwoo retorted.
Thankfully, the library wasn’t traditional in the sense that students had to be quiet while using the space. Most passersby' barely batted an eyelash as the two men were raised from their seats while in a heated argument.
The bitter taste in Wonwoo’s mouth only intensified the more time he wasted quarrelling with Seokmin. There are better things he can do with his time, like finding a way for you to forgive him. But he can’t help that every time he lays eyes on Seokmin, the only thing he can think of doing is socking his so-called friend in the face.
“We’ll see who she ends up with in the end, and I’ll make sure it isn’t you,” Wonwoo finalizes.
Deciding that he is done exchanging words with Seokmin, he leaves before he wastes any more of his time. The bag hooked on his shoulder was still unopened since their fight started before he could even retrieve his things. Harsh footsteps echo throughout the bustling library, and Wonwoo makes it his mission to find you. To have you in his hold before Seokmin could even think of getting near you.
…
Three o’clock. On Wednesdays, your anthropology lecture always ends at three o’clock. Wonwoo knew you wouldn’t be pleased to see him inside the arts building, waiting right outside the lecture hall. But he had to take his chance, or else Seokmin might find a way to weasel into your life once again. Just the thought of it made Wonwoo’s ears flare red. No one deserves to have you as much as he did.
The rush of students begins to trickle into the hallway, and he spots the top of your head before you stray too far away. With a shout of your name, he watches as you try to find the voice that has been calling out for you.
Suddenly, the world around Wonwoo lacks colour as his gaze sets upon you. Standing there, you shine brightly, and Wonwoo couldn’t care less how stupid he looked while trying to gain your attention. The people around him are nothing but blockages that stop him from being able to grab onto you. Your expression is filled with curiosity as he waves his hand, beckoning you closer to him. Despite the obvious conflicting thoughts that are running through your head, Wonwoo knows you won’t be able to resist him.
As you near, Wonwoo almost sighs with content, hearing your voice for the first time since that night.
“What are you doing here?”
The two of you wedged into one of the corners, waiting for the crowd to thin out. Grabbing your wrist, Wonwoo pulls you against him. Your back is flush with the wall; the rest of the students push past the both of you to get to their next class or to go home.
“Wanted to be the one to give you a ride home,” Wonwoo mutters truthfully, but he knows that’s not why you’re asking.
He watches the way you gulp, trying not to get caught up in the heat of his body. You’re so close to him that if he makes one slight movement he could end up kissing you. The feathery breath you let out almost causes Wonwoo to forget what he’s meant to be doing. Enamoured by your soft pink lips and how the heat on your cheeks intensifies with each passing moment. He simply can’t take his eyes off you.
It seems as though you're making Wonwoo fall for you without even realizing it.
The delightful scrunch in your brow only leaves him tingling, satisfied with the fact that you two are in such proximity after everything that happened. Although Wonwoo knows he has a long way to go to gain your forgiveness, he allows himself to enjoy the smaller moments with you while he can.
“I can walk,” you retort, recoiling out of his grasp before walking over to the exit.
“Walking is fine too,” Wonwoo attested, catching up with your fast pace.
“Alone,” you reiterate.
Wonwoo is amused by your direct attempt to get him to leave you alone. He almost laughs, you should know him well enough by now. What Wonwoo wants, he gets, it doesn’t matter if you’re mad at him. He’s confident enough in himself to know that he’s capable of making you fall for him all over again.
If there’s one thing Wonwoo is unmistakably good at, it’s the chase.
With his experience, it doesn’t take much for you to be perched right back into his palm. You’re a woman after all. The only difference between you and everyone else is that Wonwoo can envision a future with you in it, which has always been hard for him to do. But with you, Wonwoo can only wish that he could live till he’s a thousand if it meant that he could spend the rest of that time with you.
“Please darling, let me take you home,” Wonwoo begs, his slender fingers grasped against your wrist. “You’re probably tired from walking around campus all day.”
He could practically see the way the gears were turning in your head like you couldn’t decipher his underlying motives, and he couldn’t help but grin at your obvious overthinking.
“Fine, but you’re giving me a ride. That’s it.”
The smile on Wonwoo’s face widens as you try to act uninterested, but he knows deep down your resolve is beginning to weaken.
three.
Wonwoo can only surmise that his plan has been taking effect. Not only have you been less reluctant to agree to him giving you a ride to and from school, but you’ve also been replying to his texts more frequently. Albeit they haven’t been the same long and sporadic messages you used to send, Wonwoo can’t seem to complain.
[5:05 p.m.] [wons <3: u got home alright darling?] [darling <3: u drove me home.] [wons <3: ik. but i still wanna ask] [darling <3: i should be asking u that] [darling <3: not that i care tho] [wons <3: sure u dont] [darling <3: i don't! now bye i have to study for my quiz tmrw] [wons <3: okayy wtv helps u sleep at night 😆] [wons <3: dont study too hard. ill pick u up tmrw at the same time ok?] [darling <3: 👍]
Smiling like a kid on Christmas, Wonwoo can’t help but feel the rush of butterflies flutter in his stomach. He can tell you’re trying to put on a detached facade, but your caring nature seems to be slipping through the cracks.
His plan to slowly reinstate himself into your life seems to be working. Even though he understands it won’t happen overnight, Wonwoo doesn’t mind waiting for you to forgive him. At least he knows that he’s one step closer than Seokmin ever will be.
…
“Good morning,” Wonwoo greets you, moving to the side to open the door.
As you slip into the passenger seat, he realizes how much he misses you sitting beside him. You were always in your world while he drove, staring at the window reading all the signs along the way, or humming softly to the lyrics of the current song playing.
“Morning,” you mumble back, settling into your spot.
It’s that time of the year when all the leaves start to fall off the branches. The pavement was littered with hues of brown, red, and yellow. Wonwoo loved autumn the most out of all the seasons. It reminded him of the smell of cinnamon and warm cups of tea. Most importantly, it was autumn when he first met you.
“You ready for your quiz?” Wonwoo decides to fill the silence.
As you turn your body, you give him a soft smile, and he knows with that expression, that you probably didn’t get much studying done the night before. He chuckles at your meek countenance, you’ve always been the type to procrastinate.
“I know that look. Don’t worry, you’re the smartest person I know,” Wonwoo reassures you.
The right hand he had gripping the steering wheel strays from its place, seeking your hold. Allowing himself to take a glance at you before interlocking his fingers with yours, rubbing soothing circles along your delicate skin. Sensing you freeze upon his touch, Wonwoo’s hands almost break out in a sweat, hoping you won’t pull away. And surprisingly, you don't.
Both of you returned to a relaxed state, and he’s overjoyed that you’ve decided to allow him to touch you again. Even if it’s something as innocent as hand-holding on the way to school. Wonwoo squeezes your hand tighter, reminding himself that you’re still beside him. That you chose to be with him.
It wasn’t long before the campus university was in Wonwoo’s view. Pulling into his parking spot, he does so without letting go of your hand once. Even when turning the gear shift into park, his hold on you has yet to be relinquished.
There’s a pause of silence that Wonwoo decides to break.
“I know it’s not going to be easy to forgive me, I’ve done so many things that, if I was in your position, wouldn’t have let slide. But I’m asking for a chance, just one chance to show you that I can be better,” Wonwoo confesses.
He observes that way you take time to think, his thumb continuing to rub mindless circles into your skin. Wonwoo didn’t think he’d be so nervous to hear what you had to say, or if you would say anything at all.
“Just be patient with me, okay?” is the only thing you end up saying.
To Wonwoo, that’s a win. You didn’t deny his request for forgiveness, and that can only mean one thing. His plan is working just as he’d hoped.
“Take all the time you need, darling. I just want to be close to you again,” Wonwoo reassures you, his voice stable and comforting. He searches your eyes for even an ounce of unease.
Nodding your head, you finally loosen your hand from Wonwoo’s. As you step out of the car you leave with one final remark.
“I'll see you after class okay?”
That was all the assurance that Wonwoo needed. He’s convinced that he’s a step in the right direction. You’ve fallen for him once again, perhaps not fully, but soon enough you’ll be back to where the two of you had left off.
…
When Wonwoo gets to see you again, it’s to drop off your cognitive psych textbook. By the time he realized it was on the floor bed of his car, it was already too late to give it back to you.
As he returns to the same long hallway, he nears your apartment with a sense of unease. Flashbacks of what happened the last time he even stepped foot into the building flood his memories. Wonwoo had no reason to be nervous, especially because you’ve become more lenient about him seeing you again. But this is different, he can’t help but wonder if you’re over that night, or you’re just allowing him to enter your life again because it was easier.
The sound of him knocking on the door reverberates through the empty hallway, and a chill shoots down his spine. Why is he so nervous? He’s been here more times than he could count, and above all that he’s only here to return your textbook.
From the other side of the door, he can faintly hear your footsteps as you make your way over. A hand clasped around the thick spine of your book, he grips it harder as he awaits your arrival.
“Hi?” you greet him with a puzzled expression.
The breath in Wonwoo's throat evaporates into thin air, his eyes glued to the curve of your body. It’s the same sleep set you wore the night he saw Seokmin leave your apartment. Trapped in his mind, he can’t help but let his thoughts wander. Plush thighs hugged tightly by your shorts, no bra in sight, allowing your nipples to outline the satin. With a tense gulp, he knows he can’t stay for long.
“H-hey, uh, you forgot your textbook in my car,” Wonwoo stutters, eyes raking over your figure.
What the hell? Wonwoo’s seen you in everything under the sun, including a bathing suit. But why does this damn sleep set have him tripping over his words?
Before he can say anything more, you move forward to grab the book from his hands. Your hair flows over your shoulder while the strap of your tank top slips down.
Shoulders stiffening at the sight, Wonwoo really can’t stay. He might even combust into a million pieces before he can get to his car.
“Thanks.”
“It’s really no problem, sorry I’m here so late. You’re—” his words are cut off by your unexpected proposition.
“You wanna come in? I’m making some tea.”
Wonwoo is completely fucked, though he doesn’t stop himself from entering your home.
As you turn around, Wonwoo almost lets out a strained groan. He had been lucky enough to cover it up with a cough. You shoot him a confused look over your shoulder, and he mumbles a curt “It’s nothing” before you can question him further.
The scent of peppermint tea engulfs his senses, your favourite. It was your routine to drink a cup of tea before bed, but peppermint has always been your go-to. He only knew this because his mom always made sure to send you boxes of a loose-leaf version from your hometown. You didn’t drink any other kind.
There’s a sway in your hips as you move over to the kitchen counter and Wonwoo’s lost in a hypnotic state. Taking a seat at the island, he watches as you grab two of the coffee mugs from your cupboard. As you move to reach for the glassware, he observes the way your shorts ride up, giving him a direct view of the curve of your ass. He felt like a pervert for staring but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t take his eyes off you.
“Here, let me get them for you,” Wonwoo offers, moving behind you to retrieve the two mugs. His body is perfectly aligned with yours, he can feel you stiffen against him.
A rough palm is placed delicately against the exposed skin of your waist. You’re so warm. Wonwoo’s brain short circuits and he almost forgets what he’s actually meant to do. He holds you tighter against him while the handles of the cups are hooked against his fingers. With as much delicateness as possible, he situates the mugs against the granite.
The soft “thank you” that left your lips was almost too faint for either of you to hear, but due to the stillness in the atmosphere, Wonwoo heard you loud and clear.
With reluctance, Wonwoo leaves his spot behind you to return to his seat. He continues to watch you as you prepare the tea, and he’s never been more mesmerized in his life. It was almost criminal how closely he examined your actions, but you had become so captivating. It would be rude to deny the pleasure of being able to see you again.
“This one’s for you,” you mutter, setting the mug in front of his person.
“Thanks.”
A comfortable silence blankets the two of you. Your hand around your cup, savouring the tea while you scroll aimlessly on your phone. Wonwoo allows his thoughts to wander. It almost felt sinful to be inside your apartment once again, compelling him to apologize once more.
“I know I've already said it before but, I hope you know I’m not going to let this second chance be taken for granted. What I did was wrong, and I was so angry and confused that I didn’t even think about what I was saying.”
Looking up from your phone, a frown is apparent on your angelic face. But you don’t say anything, allowing him to continue with his admission of guilt.
“There are so many things I could’ve done differently, but I let my anger get the best of me. You’re the most important person in my life and I don’t want to let you go. I know I’m terrible at showing how much I care but I want you to know that deep down inside of me my love for you is there. You’re my greatest friend and I was a dumbass for not treating you that way earlier on.”
There’s a pregnant pause in the air before you respond. Wonwoo’s nerves are spiking, but he waits diligently for your reply.
“I understand that you’re sorry. And I wish that things had gone differently. I’m sure that night was a lot for both of us. Seokmin wasn’t the person I thought he was, and it sucks that you were right but I wanna move forward. It just felt so wrong for you to assume that I was with him in that way. It hurt and it was insulting for you to talk to me that way.”
The words that had been brewing in his mind were lost as he continued to listen to you.
“What’s even funnier is that me and Seokmin kissed a couple of days after our fight. I’m not even sure why I did that, but I regret it. I probably just wanted to get my mind off you and all the other stuff. Honestly, I was so naive, I didn’t think Seokmin would go to such cruel lengths to manipulate me.”
“I want to forgive you. You’re my best friend, and I don’t want to lose you either. Seokmin had put it in my head to just cut you off, and it almost felt wrong but I listened anyway. I should’ve known why he had convinced me to do all those things. I was so stupid to believe him. But I do want to fix us, I just need time.”
To hear you talk about what Seokmin did to you, and to also find out that you two had kissed made Wonwoo’s insides churn. He felt sick at the thought of the two of you, but why? You’re his friend, he shouldn’t care about the fact that you and Seokmin shared an intimate moment. Wonwoo should only care about the fact that both he and Seokmin hurt you.
“Darling, I’m so sorry. I wish there were more ways I could show you how apologetic I am. I promise I'm going to do better.”
There’s a glazed look over your eyes, and Wonwoo’s chest almost collapses into itself. The subtle pout on your lips causes a sigh to leave his lips.
Standing up, he walks over to you, cooing as he deluges you into his hold. Strong arms pull you into his chest, the faint weeping coming from you almost kills him. He hates to see you sad, and what he hates even more is that he’s the one behind most of your pain.
“I’m not going anywhere from now on. So please darling, don’t push me away anymore. I’m gonna do everything I can to show you how important you are to me,” He whispers in your ear as he runs a hand down your hair.
Wonwoo knows how much you love it when he does that. It always calmed you down on the days you couldn’t regulate your emotions.
Sensitive to the sad things in life yet ardent towards the things you are passionate about. You have always been a softer soul, a soul that feels everything without a care in the world. At the same time, you are a whirlwind of emotions, and different colours of sensibilities, it’s your greatest strength but also your weakness. Wonwoo admires that about you. Never afraid to feel, never afraid to wear your heart on your sleeve. Everything he isn't.
That night, Wonwoo vowed to be a better person for you. He also promised he’d never let someone like Seokmin take advantage of your kindness again.
four.
Despite Wonwoo’s desire to submerge his feelings into a deep void, he can’t seem to dismiss the fact that he’s slowly falling for you. It didn’t start when you had begun to ignore him, nor did it start when you decided to search for comfort in another.
Seeking a piece of you in everyone he’s been with. It's always been in a subconscious manner, but the more he looks back on all his relationships, he’s started to realize that the one thing that was missing was you.
Falling in love with you was gradual.
In the same way, the tides along the shore would slowly pull the sand back into the ocean. In the same way, the seasons changed from summer to winter. Wonwoo’s love for you is like autumn leaves. Shades of green morph into the familiar, comforting, yellow, red, and brown. Their descent from their branches slowed, dwindling with the breeze before they ultimately hit the ground. Before he knew it, autumn had begun.
Before he knew it, he was in love.
Everything over the past month had just been a wake-up call. Slowly rising from an insomnious state, he began to find clarity in his past actions, in his reasons for wondering why none of the relationships worked out in his favour. No one understood him the way you did, and no one understood you the way he did. And he had been foolish enough to not act upon those realizations sooner.
…
Wonwoo ached to see you again. To be close to you, with your scent filling his nostrils, your warmth engulfing him, he couldn’t stop thinking about you. Yet he sat in the library trying to make sense of his pending assignment. Mingyu sits across from him, looking close to slamming his forehead with his textbook.
Wonwoo couldn’t care less about regression to the mean or whatever it is his statistics professor is trying to teach him. Every second that passed his mind would end up wandering to thoughts of you. That night in your apartment, the whiff of peppermint tea, your arms around him as he held you close. Desperation is a dangerous emotion, for it only made him want to close his laptop and rush to your side.
Why didn’t he just fess up about his feelings for you right then and there? He could’ve done it, but his intuition stopped him. From the start of you finally letting him back into your life, neither of you brought up your confession of being in love with him. The prospect of him even acknowledging the subject has Wonwoo believing it wouldn’t end the way he hopes.
Attempting to suppress his curious thoughts, he’s afraid of you denying everything you disclosed to him that night. He didn’t want you to renounce your declaration of love under the guise of anger or the heat of the moment. The only thing he wanted from you now was the truth.
“Well, you look a lot better than you did last time we were here,” Mingyu speaks up.
Taken out of his trance, Wonwoo lifts his head from the screen of his laptop. An involuntary chuckle erupts from his chest. Despite his muddled thoughts, Mingyu is right. He looks and feels a lot better than he did before.
“A lot of shit happened, but yeah, I guess you can say that.”
“Hmm, let me guess. You two made up?” Mingyu doesn’t beat around the bush.
Wonwoo is aware that Mingyu’s probably only asking to remedy his curiosity, or so he could update Kalia about the situation, but he doesn’t care. If anything, he wants everyone to know that he won you over instead of Seokmin.
“Yeah, kinda? I don’t know. I’m trying my best to be better for her though,” Wonwoo lets out a half-hearted sigh.
Mingyu looked at him with curiosity, and Wonwoo knew that expression a little too well. It was the ‘since when were you the type of person to change for a girl’ look. His friend didn’t have to say much for him to understand what Mingyu was attempting to convey.
“You’re serious?” Mingyu presses, a lilt of doubt in his tone of voice.
“Yeah, I'm serious. Never been more serious in my life,” Wonwoo scoffs, he already knows where this conversation is heading.
Mingyu didn’t seem to buy it though, eyes rolling as he leaned back in his chair. Wonwoo crosses his arms defensively, it is typical for Mingyu to wonder where his true intentions lie. His track record wasn’t the best when it came to girls, unlike Mr. Perfect across from him.
Mingyu knew how to deal with relationships, he’s practically married to Kalia at this point.
Wonwoo, on the other hand, tended to obsess for a few months before inevitably breaking things off. It’s practically second nature for him to do so, but this is different. It's you. And Wonwoo knew that meant more to him despite his old habits.
“Be for real man, I know you. Are you sure this isn’t the same as the last hundred times you’ve liked someone?”
“Like? I don’t just like her. I’m in love with her.”
Mingyu’s eyes go wide, Wonwoo has never dropped the L–word on his friend before. Not about Haein, or any of the other girls he’s dated.
“Woah. That's different,” Mingyu lets out a low-whistle.
“That's what I mean. We’re not talking about just some other girl who I find interesting. This is my best friend,” Wonwoo continues to defend himself.
It felt weird to say those words out loud for someone else to hear, but Mingyu was the only person Wonwoo didn’t feel insecure talking to despite the fact he practically criticized him during the last study session. Wonwoo needs to let his feelings out into the world, and Mingyu is willing to listen.
“Okay, you’ve convinced me, but you better not fuck it up. I won’t punch you but I know Kalia would,” Mingyu shrugs, and he’s right. Kalia would beat him up.
Wonwoo snorts at Mingyu’s remark, “Your girlfriend is scary.”
“She is. Just don’t be a dumbass and she won’t kill you. You know how much Kalia cares about her.”
“Seems like everyone does. Seokmin cares a little too much,” Wonwoo huffs, thinking back to what you had told him the last time he saw you.
“Ah. I heard about that,” Mingyu smirks.
Wonwoo could feel the hairs on the back of his neck starting to stick up. He didn’t particularly like the idea of you and Seokmin together. In all honesty, he doesn’t even want to see him within a hundred feet of your person. Wonwoo had half the mind to beat him to a pulp for how he hurt you, and he’s sure that Seokmin feels the same way about him. The only difference was that you had a clear choice, and Wonwoo came out on top.
“I can’t believe him actually. He’s dead to me,” Wonwoo scowls, hating the bitter taste Seokmin’s name leaves on his tongue.
“Dude… Seokmin is still our friend,” Mingyu attempts to mediate, like the soft-hearted man he is, but Wonwoo doesn’t care.
“No. He’s your friend. What he did is fucked up, even for me. His dumbass is not stepping a foot near her, not if I have any say in the matter.”
Hot on his heels, Wonwoo packs his belongings and exits the library with flames blazing his trail. Mingyu still sits there dumbfounded, recovering from the shock of his friend's crass declaration.
five.
[12:11 p.m.] [wons <3: meet me at our spot? i have a surprise :)]
Pacing back and forth, Wonwoo waits for you at the aforementioned spot. It’s a hidden corner on campus you two found in your first year. There were multiple wooden picnic tables scattered around the lawn of green grass, but no one seemed to come to this side of the university. It had been an alcove of secludedness for the two of you since that day. Wonwoo had spent most of his lunch breaks eating here with you when the crowds of students got too overwhelming.
Deciding it wasn’t doing him any good walking back and forth like a madman, he takes a seat at the table you both claimed for yourselves. Even with the abundance of available picnic tables, neither of you ever sat anywhere else. The table’s location had always been perfect. Right under a large oak tree that had just the right amount of shade yet a prime amount of sunlight. The leaves had already shed, and there was no protection from the rays, but Wonwoo settled in his unassigned seat anyway.
Inspecting the food he bought you, he made sure that it was still warm enough for you to eat. Two grilled pork banh mi’s with extra pickled vegetables wrapped securely within the plastic bag, your favourite.
Wonwoo had no reason to buy it for you, other than the fact that as he was leaving the library in a sour mood, he was able to snag the last two from the dining hall. Thinking about the look you would have on your face once you got here made him smile to himself. So without a second thought, he paid for the sandwiches before sending you a text.
“So what's the surprise?”
Ears perking, Wonwoo whips his head over in the direction of your sweet voice. Skin glowing in the sunlight, he admires you with a lopsided smile. You look so good today, almost too good. The black skirt you wore flounced with each step you took, while your cardigan hung low on your shoulders.
He wishes he could have you only for himself, finding it unfair that everyone else in the whole damn world got to admire how gorgeous you are, including himself. Wonwoo doesn’t get tired of looking at you, it’s like a breath of fresh air each time.
“Hi, darling. There were only two left,” he nudged his head, motioning to the plastic bag that you are very familiar with.
With glowing eyes, you let out a squeal of delight. Wonwoo knew he did something right for once.
“Oh my god. How did you know I was craving these today? I was thinking about it all morning,” you gush, rushing over to open the bag that held your most prized possession.
“I didn’t, but I know you’d never say no to your favourite,” he chuckles.
You didn’t even get to take a proper seat before diving into the banh mi.
“I forgot to pack a lunch today,” you bubbled, mouth still half full with food.
Wonwoo continues to grin, pleased with himself that something small like this brings you so much happiness. Tutting, he jokingly scolds you, wiping the cilantro that stuck to your cheek.
“You shouldn’t talk when your mouth is full darling, you’ll choke.”
Rolling your eyes at him, you swallow your food and take a sip of water before continuing with the conversation.
“I woke up late today and forgot to make something for lunch, so thank you for this, I was starving,” you beam up at him, sitting cross-legged on the bench.
“It’s a good thing I’m here then, right?” He chuckles, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, not wanting it to get in the way of your eating.
“Yeah I guess you’re right,” you mumble before taking another bite. “Fuck this is so good right now, you don’t even know.”
Wonwoo hums, amused with your reaction before unwrapping his sandwich. Admiring his view of you, he continues to listen to you talk about how you’re absolutely in the trenches for your next cognitive psychology midterm.
“I’m so screwed. I can’t seem to properly memorize the theories, especially the one about Piaget’s stages. It keeps getting mixed up in my head,” you mutter in between bites.
“I wish I could help, but you're the psych major,” Wonwoo shrugs, bemused at how your cheeks resemble those of a hamster.
“True. Enough about school, my head hurts just thinking about it,” you sigh.
“Alright. No school. Do you have plans for the weekend, at least?” Wonwoo asks.
Your eyes lit up at his question, and you were ready to divulge what you had going on for the end of the week. Midterms were only a few days away, and everyone was so high-strung about them. Wonwoo knew you just wanted it to be over. You’ve always been the type to hate preparing for exams.
“Well, June, Lynne, Leigh, and I are hitting up Raval on Friday. We wanted to celebrate the start of the mid-term break,” you explain. “You can join us if you want.”
Before either you or Wonwoo could get another word in, his phone rings obnoxiously on the table. His mom’s caller ID flashes across his screen before he accepts the call, propping it up so the both of you are within the camera lens.
“Hi mama!” you wave excitedly, Wonwoo’s mom smiling back at you.
There wasn’t much he was grateful for in life, but the fact that you and his mom were so close was one of those things.
“Hey ma, what’s up?” Wonwoo greets her, the grin on his face widening.
“Hi, my babies. I just wanted to say hi!” His mom waves her hand at the camera, trying to stay in the frame.
“Dear, did you get your box of peppermint tea?” she asks you, Wonwoo’s gaze returning to your beautiful smile. No words could explain the happiness he felt seeing you talk to his mom.
“Yes mama, I did, thank you so much! I’ve been drinking it every night,” you assure her, sending her flying kisses through the phone.
“Wonwoo, treat her well while you guys are away, got it? I just wanted to check on you both real quick,” his mom chattered through the speaker.
“Yes, ma, I know. We’re eating lunch, but I’ll call you when I get home. Love you,” Wonwoo feigns annoyance but still tells her he loves her.
“Bye, mama! Love you,” you bid her farewell, the call beeping indicating that Wonwoo had hung up.
For the rest of Wonwoo’s lunch break, the two of you ate your banh mi in comfortable silence. There was a silent agreement of eating and just enjoying the view of the secret spot that Wonwoo shares with you. With everyone else gone, it was perfect.
If Wonwoo could have any superpower in the world, it would be able to stop time. He yearns for this moment to last forever. Enjoying your company in a secluded part of campus, where there’s no one to bother you, no one to question your friendship.
He longs for more days with you like this, away from the noise, away from distractions that cause his attention to stray away from who he cares about. He only needs one thing in his life to truly feel fulfilled, and it's you.
act three, Hold Me by the Heart.
chapter one.
Despite the reconciliation between you and Wonwoo, you still find yourself doubting his actions. Did he want to change for the sake of your friendship? Or was he only putting effort knowing you had almost slipped through his fingertips?
Warmth enveloped you every time he was around, every time he gave you small words of affirmation. Even with all these signs of growth from him, you still had that vexing churn in your gut.
That swirl of intuition felt like you were just waiting for the other shoe to drop. As much as you hate not being able to trust your best friend completely, apprehension continues to gnaw at your insides.
“Hey? You still in there?” June interrupts your train of thought, waving her hand in front of your gaze.
“I thought you and Wonwoo made up?” She continued to press for answers, which was typical of her.
“We did,” you sigh, taking a sip of your Long Island iced tea.
“Then why the long face?”
“I don’t know. Maybe I’m just thinking too hard,” you chuckle, although there’s no humour behind it.
June mirrors your expression, frowning alongside you as she pats your back, trying to get you out of your forlorn state.
“That calls for another drink!” She attempts to lighten the mood, her pointer fingers poking at your smile lines, forcing a grin to grace your lips.
Rolling your eyes at her, you agree to her proposition. Not wanting to waste your weekend on immutable thoughts of Wonwoo. He’s the only person who could make you sit around a room full of people and still feel like something, or rather, someone, was missing.
In the back of your mind, you wonder if he remembers the confession you accidentally spilled during your fight. In the midst of all the anger, the pent-up frustration, you deliberate whether he still remembers the fleeting “I love you” that left your trembling lips that night.
Before you could blink, June was already back in her seat. A tray of shot glasses filled with brown liquor. There was enough for everyone to take at least two. Although you know it’s not a good idea to get drunk with the negative thoughts floating within your mind, you choose to ignore your rationality for one night.
“Wonwoo still may be an asshole, but if he makes you happy, who am I to judge?” Leigh speaks up from his seat, knocking back the shot glass till it’s empty.
A small giggle leaves your lips, duplicating his actions and swallowing the alcohol in one go.
“So what is the deal with you and Wonwoo now? I feel like every time I see you, he’s right behind you like some kind of brooding bodyguard,” Lynne queries, ready for you to fess up.
The breath you take in is sharp, not knowing where to even start. The past month has gone by in a blur, too many events happening in such a short amount of time. You couldn’t even process it properly yourself, let alone recite all that has gone down to your friends.
“Well, I may have texted him after that incident with Seokmin. And after that, it just snowballed. He started driving me to school again, eating lunch with me, apologizing every chance he got. I-I don’t even know anymore,” you inhale, not realizing that you have barely taken a chance to breathe.
“Interesting…” Lynne mumbles, tapping on her chin as if she is deep in thought.
“He’s just become more considerate. I don’t know why he’s decided to change, but I can’t complain because I can see the change,” you continue, defending him. After all, you knew your friends didn’t see him in a particularly positive light.
There was a pause in the air, everyone sitting at the table still processing your defence. Even if they still hate him, you don’t really care. Yes, you care for their opinions, and you cherish their affection for you, but Wonwoo deserves a second chance in your eyes.
“I mean… Isn’t the reason he’s even acting like this because he hated seeing you with Seokmin?” Leigh disputes, and you frown.
There’s truth behind his statement. Wonwoo only noticed your absence because you had started hanging out with Seokmin more. But it worked in your favour, so can you even be mad?
“Maybe. Honestly, I don’t think I care about his reasons. He's trying and that’s all that should matter, right?” you mutter, taking another shot from the tray.
The looks on your friends’ faces say more about what they want to say to you than their words ever could. You’re disregarding Wonwoo’s toxic behaviour in hopes that this new chapter with him is more than just some facade.
“Oh, that’s not…” Leigh whispers under his breath but doesn’t say more.
They know they can’t change your mind.
[11:17 p.m.] [wons <3: still out with your friends?]
Your screen's brightness illuminates the bar's dim lighting, bringing everyone's attention to the bubble with Wonwoo’s name clearly on display.
“Speaking of the devil,” Lynne shakes her head as she nurses the drink in her hand.
[11:18 p.m.] [darling <3: yeahh, we’ll probably head home after a few rounds, why?] [wons <3: jw. have fun darling] [darling <3: thx! ]
“I don’t know about you guys, but I’d rather we drink till I forget everything from midterms instead of talking about Wonwoo,” June pipes up, disrupting the silence that had enveloped your group.
As she calls for someone to bring more shots to your table, you quietly smile to yourself. Wonwoo usually was not one to text first, but it’s different now. Even if everyone else can’t stand him, you can’t help but feel the exact opposite.
There’s a hum of agreement, and everything becomes a blur after that. The constant flow of alcohol forces you to focus on what’s in front of you. Wandering thoughts of Wonwoo are brought to a halt as you feel yourself slipping into a drunken state.
…
“Jun! My boyfriend is here!” June exclaims, practically walking sideways outside of Raval. It’s deep into the night at this point and your friend decided that the best person to call was her boyfriend.
As she sways on the sidewalk, your two other friends hold you up in an attempt to keep you from falling face-first into the cement. Despite how late it was, there were still cars bustling past on the street. Jun’s car idling as he tries his best to help his girlfriend into the passenger side.
The university town is still alive with students entering and exiting outside of the bars and restaurants as everyone celebrates the end of the week. You can only wish for Wonwoo to be here with you, but you knew he wasn’t the type to go to bars this late, opting to stay up playing League on his computer instead.
“Hey babe, if you want, you can call Wonwoo to come pick you up,” Lynne speaks to you soothingly, obviously not as intoxicated as you are. “You’ve been mumbling his name for like ten minutes now.”
“Wonwoo? Is he here?”
“No. But I’m going to call him so he can get you,” she gives you a tight smile.
Pulling out your phone from her purse, and bringing the screen to your face. You widen your eyes, moving your head closer to the camera. A lopsided smile sneaks its way onto your lips as it unlocks.
“Are you sure this is a good idea? She’s fucking gone,” Leigh chastises his sister.
Lynne gives him an exasperated look, shrugging her shoulders. Her brother rolls his eyes in return, both defeated. They know they can’t stop you from wanting Wonwoo, plus he’s the only one who knows the code to your apartment. You’re too drunk to even unlock your phone, let alone press buttons on the keypad of your door lock.
Hell, you can’t even stand without falling aimlessly to the ground.
“Wonwoo? It’s Lynne. Can you come to Raval?” you barely register your friend's voice, looking off into the distance. Hoping that Wonwoo would magically appear any second from now.
The call is dropped and they manoeuvre you onto the bench outside the entrance of the bar. Head flopping onto Leigh’s shoulder, you close your eyes. Maybe the next time you open them, Wonwoo will be standing right in front of you.
What felt like seconds were actually ten minutes to your slightly more sober friends. Jun and June waiting diligently beside their car waiting for Wonwoo to finally arrive as the other two are constantly trying to keep you upright.
When they agreed to have a few more shots, they didn’t expect you to take another five along with two more long islands. Regretful for their lack of heed, they had forgotten how much of a lightweight you are.
“Oh! Fucking finally, I swear he drives like a Grandpa,” Leigh scoffs, seeing Wonwoo’s car pull up behind Jun’s.
“Where is she?” Wonwoo's voice bellows, and it’s as if he’s near.
With your eyes still sealed shut, you mumble incoherently to Leigh, “It’s like he’s right here. Am I that drunk that I’m imagining things?”
“Oh my god… take her home please,” Leigh doesn’t answer your question and you’re slightly offended.
“Hey!” you pout, finally opening your eyes as you feel someone tug you away from your source of heat.
Strong arms wrap themselves around your waist, a broad chest is the only thing within your line of sight.
“Excuse me! I’m waiting for my Wonwoo to come and pick me up,” you squeak, slapping the chest of whoever is trying to take you away from your friends.
There’s a collective groan behind you.
“She’s wasted.” Lynne sighs to her brother while he nods in agreement.
“Your Wonwoo?” A familiar voice has you stopping in your tracks.
Looking up at the once faceless person who was dragging you away, you find yourself face to face with the man you had been yearning for all night.
“Woah. You look just like him,” bemused with the stranger in front of you.
Squinting your eyes, your palm traces along his structured jaw. The tips of your finger poking at his cheek affirm your suspicions. He felt very real under your touch. Every line and freckle is scarily alike to your Wonwoo.
“Like who?”
“My Wonwoo.”
The man’s chuckle vibrates deeply against your side. The same side where he has you pinned to his chest. A smug expression is plastered on his face as he watches you with intrigue.
“I believe there’s only one Wonwoo,” he argues.
“I disagree,” you huff as he pats your head, ushering you to his car.
Unsure of why you’re even following some random is beyond you at that moment. All you could think about is texting Wonwoo once you’re safely tucked into bed.
“Thanks for giving me a call, she hasn’t been answering her phone,” Wonwoo bids farewell to your friends as they start to pile into Jun’s car.
“At least you can see why she hasn’t been texting you back. We might’ve given her too much to drink,” Lynne shakes her head as she chuckles at your drunken state.
“If my opinion matters, I think I had the perfect amount,” you butt in, wanting your friends to know that you can still kind of register what they’re saying.
“Right…” Leigh speaks up. “Anyway, we’re going to leave now that you’re here. Make sure she gets home safe!”
“Will do,” Wonwoo promises, waving them off as Jun drives away.
Glowering, you take a second look at him. How weird is it that a Wonwoo look-alike exists?
The street lights that line the sidewalk cause your vision to go in and out periodically. If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought that the man in front of you was the real deal. But you did know better, and you would’ve recognized your Wonwoo from a mile away.
“I think it’s time that we get you home,” Wonwoo smirks down at you, reaffirming the grip he has on your waist.
“How do you know where I live?” You interrogate him, finding it weird that this man would have your address in the first place.
“That’s a secret that will be revealed later, darling,” He teases, opening the door to his car so you can take a seat.
Once he’s on the driver's side, Wonwoo adjusts your seatbelt so it’s not uncomfortable during the ride. The warmth of his arm brings you to snuggle against it, looking up at him with a coy smile.
“You know, for a fake Wonwoo, you’re pretty cute.”
“Fake Wonwoo?”
“Yeah, real Wonwoo wouldn’t come all this way just to pick me up,” you sigh, pulling away from his warmth to stare out the window dramatically.
“I think he would.”
Laughing at his statement you roll your eyes. The person in front of you didn’t know your best friend like you did.
“How would you know?” You bite back. If anyone could win the ‘I know Wonwoo more than you’ contest, it's you.
“That’s also a secret.”
Slouching back into your seat you huff out a breath of air once again, “Why do you have to have so many secrets?”
“Because.”
“It’s a secret?” you counter. You had a feeling that would be his answer anyway.
“See? You’re finally getting it,” he gives you a cheesy smile, pinching your cheek.
Slapping his hand away, you’re offended at how endeared he is with you. The only thing on your mind was the softness of your comforter and the warm mint tea that you knew you were going to have later.
“Just take me home,” you sneer, shifting your whole body away from the driver’s side. Thighs pressed against the door, your brattiness starting to peek through your insobriety.
“Hey, hey, don’t be like that,” Wonwoo pouts, lip jutting out as his eyes sparkle under the city lights.
You don’t budge, body firmly pressed against the plastic of the car door. Arms crossed as you feign annoyance at him.
“You know, I get really scared driving at night. I think I need you to hold my hand.”
With a sense of reluctance, you offer your hand to him. Unsure of what has you agreeing to his request, you can’t say no to someone so handsome. Wonwoo interlaces his fingers with yours, and it surprises you how well your palm fits into his, allowing him to rest your intertwined hands on your lap.
The ride back to your apartment is peaceful for the most part. The wistful city lights calm the drumming beat of your heart. Everything moves past in a blur; you can’t help but admire the cars driving past, time slowing down with the music lulling through the radio speakers.
Serenity is the best way to describe the time you spend sitting next to Wonwoo on the drive towards your place.
“I wonder if the real Wonwoo is thinking about me right now,” you mumble, still staring out the window.
Wonwoo’s hand still entwined with yours, he hums along with the music, the other one on the steering wheel. Initially, you thought he didn’t hear what you had said, but he ended up replying to you.
“I know he is.”
Turning in your seat, you look at him, analyzing his side profile as he stares ahead. There’s yet another frown that settles into the fine line of your face, how could he possibly know whether or not Wonwoo is thinking about you?
“You don’t know that,” you speak with a sour tone.
“I do though,” he counters with a glance towards you.
“How?”
Disgruntled at his amusement, you know he’s just going to say it’s another one of his secrets, which you’re starting to get sick and tired of. Why can’t he just tell you? It’s not like you’ll see him after today.
“Nevermind. You’re just going to say it’s a secret,” you grumble but still hold onto his hand.
For whatever reason, you become engrossed in the view of your hands linked together. His slender fingers and clean nails had you intrigued. You had a feeling that you looked silly just staring at his hand in yours, but there was no helping it.
Fake Wonwoo has nice hands.
“You have pretty hands,” you tell him, no filter left within you due to your lack of sobriety.
“Thank you,” he grins, tightening his grasp on you.
The drive felt longer than you’re used to, but you decided to blame everything on the alcohol.
“Are we almost there yet?”
“Yes darling, just a few more minutes,” he answers you, rubbing small circles on the side of your thumb.
Another five minutes felt more like a year, but you couldn’t complain. Your seat was comfortable, the heater was at the right temperature and Wonwoo’s hold brought you solace.
“We’re here. I’m gonna help you out okay? So just sit pretty and I’ll get you,” Wonwoo explains, and your cheeks burn from his indirect compliment.
“Okay.”
A few seconds pass and the door opens, his tall figure slouching down to grab you by your waist. He circles behind your back before leaning over to undo the seatbelt. It was almost too affectionate for a stranger, but something inside you had you leaning your head against his shoulder.
“Don’t worry about walking. I’ll carry you.”
You don’t respond to him, instead, you wrap your arms around his broad shoulders and hold onto him even tighter. Breathing in his cologne, you smell the familiar scent of Wonwoo’s cologne. Your olfactory senses take in the aroma of rose and pear.
Lazy Sunday Morning. It was your favourite out of all the perfumes he owns.
Closing your eyes, you allow Wonwoo to carry you inside your apartment. The sound of buttons beeping at the front of the entrance, and the warmth of his body, almost entranced you into a slumber. But you didn’t want the fantasy to end, you didn’t want this version of Wonwoo to slip out of your grasp.
Nose nuzzling into the dip between his neck and shoulder, you make yourself comfortable as he stands inside the elevator, you in his arms, waiting to ascend to your floor.
The beeping sound returns as Wonwoo opens the front door that leads to your home. There’s a sense of wonder: Would this be what it would be like if Wonwoo were finally yours?
Would he carry you to bed when you were too tired to stand? Hold your hand in his during every car ride? The thought of those things happening seemed like it would only be possible in some made-up faraway land.
“Darling, we’re home,” Wonwoo’s baritone voice brings you out of your half-awake dream.
We’re home. How bittersweet it sounds coming from the lips of someone who isn’t yours.
“Thank you.”
“Anything for you.”
The mattress sinks a tad as you feel yourself being placed into the warmth of your comforter. Your arms don’t let go of your hold on Wonwoo’s shoulders. As you stare into his eyes, the dim lighting of your bedside lamp aids in resurfacing a sense of clarity within you.
“Will you finally tell me your secrets?” You whisper, even though there is no reason to.
“Only if you tell me yours.”
There's a pause. No one dares to speak as you two continue to look at each other in silence. All that is left unspoken can be seen through his eyes, you wanted to ask. Every particle inside you just wanted to know whether there was a chance he felt the same way you did.
“Come and lay beside me?” You request, tone laced with reticence.
“Anything for you,” he repeats once again.
Lowering his body onto yours, arms still circling his shoulders, he shifts a little so that your hands are still on him. The two of you face each other while the atmosphere is left unwavering.
What you thought would be better left unsaid takes permanent residence at the forefront of your mind. Why do you want to tell this version of Wonwoo your deepest most kept secrets all of a sudden?
Perhaps you thought that if you admitted anything now, it’ll be forgotten in the morning. It was safe with this fantasy Wonwoo who had no real attachment to the one who lives in your reality. But the effects of all those shots have started to wear off, and you’re left with a very real version of the person you’re irrevocably in love with.
“You have to go first,” you speak in a hushed tone.
Wonwoo’s arms grip your waist tighter, pulling you into his chest. The arms that are linked behind his neck do the same, holding him taut against you. You don’t want him to leave. You don’t want this form of Wonwoo to disappear before your eyes.
“Well, I didn’t think it would take you this long to realize but, I am the real Wonwoo,” his chuckle is deep, the glint of amusement sparkling in his eyes.
“I think I did. I just didn’t want this dream to end,” you smile bitterly.
“But it’s not a dream? I’m here with you, and I’m very real.”
Burying your face into his sweater, you sigh harshly. This is where it ends.
“I’m sorry. It was probably such a nuisance having to pick me up just for me to spew out nonsense in return,” You’re embarrassed, hiding your face even further into his chest.
“Will you please look at me?” Wonwoo asks, his voice low, “You’ll never be a nuisance to me.”
His hand comes up to your head, fingers carding down your hair. Staring deeply into your eyes, you can feel his sincerity. The breath in your throat is caught and you’re unable to conjure up a reply.
“I know that old version of me is stuck in your mind, but I don’t want to be like that anymore. I’m willing to pick you up, no matter the distance. I wish you knew that sooner,” he vows, eyebrows scrunching as he tries to convey his feelings to you.
“I’ll tell you my secret since you told me yours. I don’t think I would be able to say this while I’m sober,” you begin to lay your heart out bare for him.
Taking a moment to think about how you want to word your confession, you grasp the hand that’s cradling your head. Intertwining your fingers with his once again, you stare at Wonwoo like he’s the answer to all your problems.
The siren-like voice that sings within your heart is finally able to release itself from the prison your brain had placed it in. All you’ve wanted from Wonwoo was for him to love you, and on the off chance he feels the same way, then you’re willing to take the plunge into the deep waters of the unknown.
“I don’t know if you remember me telling you, that time during our fight. I was–I am in love with you. I know you don’t feel the same way, I understand, but I don’t think I can be friends with you after this.”
“Real or fake, whatever you are or whatever this moment is. I’m still in love with you. I hate that I can’t tell you this without feeling scared or ashamed. I’ve loved you since the moment you came into class with your big nerdy glasses. I’ve loved you since you came back for a senior year when you had everyone’s attention on you. And I’ve loved you even when you were in love with someone else.”
Taking a breath, you stop your tangent for a moment before beginning again.
“I’ve loved you during everything we’ve been through together. Even when I chose to ignore you, I woke up every morning with you still on my mind. It was hard, and I don’t know why I couldn’t let go of my feelings for you but a part of me was always hoping that one day you would feel the same way.”
It’s done. There was nothing you could do to backtrack on your words. No time machine to take away your confession and erase it from his memory. Your heart felt free for the first time in years, and the weight on your shoulders lightened exponentially.
Wonwoo doesn’t dare speak, and your pulse quickens from his prolonged silence. The mere seconds that passed felt like an eternity, and that was enough to bring you out of your drunken state.
“Will you still love me tomorrow? When it's morning, and you’re sober. Will I still be the one you love?” Wonwoo's voice is timbre, barely loud enough to hear over your beating heart.
“Yes. Even when you weren’t around. Even when you weren’t available, I still loved you,” you admit to him.
The fingers that were laced with yours move to your jaw, Wonwoo’s palm tracing every outline of your face. The rough skin from his thumb contrasts the softness of your cheek. Memorizing every line and wrinkle, he continues to caress you, as if he was communicating with his touch.
“If you didn’t want me tomorrow, you’d still be the person I wake up thinking about. I hated not knowing whether you meant what you said,” he pauses, clarifying his jumble of words, “the night we fought, I mean. Because I heard you, even when I was blinded with jealousy and anger. I had hoped you meant what you confessed to me that night.”
The sinking feeling in your stomach doesn’t subside. There hadn’t been a day in all the years you’ve known your best friend where you thought you would hear him reciprocate the feelings you were holding deep down inside you.
“What I’m trying to say is that I’m in love with you. I’m sorry it took so long for me to realize that it was you all along. I don’t know why I never admitted it to myself, but you’ve been in front of me this whole time.”
The pad of Wonwoo’s thumb shadows over your bottom lip, your breath hitching under his touch. With soft eyes and an even softer touch, Wonwoo couldn’t take his hands off you. There was no lewd denotation behind his actions, just wanting to feel his skin against yours.
“I feel so much regret because you were always the one person I truly wanted and I never acted on those instincts,” Wonwoo confided, the weight of his words seeping into you with a profound sense of awareness.
“I’m yours, Wonwoo. That will never change,” you speak frankly.
“Just promise me you’ll love me tomorrow too,” he chokes out.
“I’ll love you even if there is no tomorrow.”
chapter two, the first day of junior year.
Before the age of sixteen, everything was a blur. Your routine was mundane, with average grades, average parents, and an even more average love life. Before the age of sixteen, there were no particular moments in all your years worth noting. It wasn’t until you met Wonwoo on the first day of eleventh grade.
Once you laid your eyes on him, you saw the potential of a new friendship. However, your teenage self didn’t realize how deep-rooted Wonwoo would become in your life from that day forward.
“Hi! It’s nice to meet you. Wonwoo right?” You greeted, your figure looming over Wonwoo who was sitting at the picnic table in the school's courtyard.
The September sun shone bright, blinding Wonwoo as he placed a hand over his eyes to get a better look at the stranger in front of him.
You explicitly remembered him eating lunch alone while playing Super Smash Bros on his Nintendo Switch. His black hair was long and covered his forehead, glasses were thick and large-framed. Wonwoo was a breath of fresh air from the other boys at your school. Unlike the rest of them, he was more reserved and didn’t talk much. His silence intrigued you.
“Hi?” he replied as a confused frown graced his lips before he returned to his game.
Deciding to ignore his introverted personality, you introduce yourself. You take out your lunch box, unveiling the spam musubi you prepared the night before.
“Do you mind if I join you?” you ask him even though you’ve already begun unpacking the food from your bag.
“Well, I guess it’s okay,” he shrugged, interested in everything but the person sitting beside him.
Peering closer at his screen, you watched with intent. The two characters fighting on a floating stage, Wonwoo spamming buttons with expertise. You’ve played Super Smash Bros before, but you weren’t as good as him.
“Are you playing Smash Bros? You’re really good,” you mumbled, taking a bite of your food.
“Thanks.”
Miffed by his lack of speech, you continued to watch him play, his triangle kimbap left ignored as he focused on winning.
“You can do multiplayer with this right? Can I play too?” you asked him, observing his gameplay over his shoulder.
He shoots you a quirked eyebrow before returning his attention to his screen. Three to zero. You found Wonwoo to be an expert compared to your novice skills.
“You know how to play?” Wonwoo stared at you in disbelief.
“Duh! Sometimes Seokmin brings his switch for spare period. I only play Cloud or Bayonetta though,” you explained.
Wonwoo looked impressed with your knowledge of the characters. He shrugged his shoulders before setting up his switch into a two-player mode. Handing you the red switch controller, you shook your head in refusal.
“Nope. I can only play with the blue controller.”
“Huh? How does that even make sense?” He scoffed but gave you the blue one anyway.
Taking the controller from his hands, you gave him a grateful smile.
“Blue is my favourite colour,” you told him, bumping your shoulder with his.
Wonwoo is confused by your outward personality, unsure of how to react to you being so comfortable with someone you had just met, but he didn’t complain. It was his first day at a new school and it wouldn’t be so bad making a new friend as soon as possible.
The player screen lit up and you quickly decided on Cloud, while Wonwoo opted to play Kirby. Smart, you thought. If played correctly, Kirby can easily absorb the abilities of his opponents.
With a randomly chosen stage, the game commenced. It didn’t take long for Wonwoo to win. He was more experienced than you were, but you had fun nonetheless.
“You’re terrible at this,” He chuckles, looking at you with a cat-like smile.
The smitten grin on your face was difficult to hide as you stared back into his eyes. Something shifted in you that day, and it marked the first time you saw Wonwoo in a romantic light. Call it cliche for falling for him so quickly, but you couldn’t help it, you were only human after all.
“I never said I was good,” you shrugged, feigning innocence.
“I guess you’re right.”
“Can we play again tomorrow?”
“Sure,” Wonwoo nodded his head, placing down his switch to get back to his food.
Enraptured by him from that moment on, you found yourself hopelessly wishing to become closer to Wonwoo. If there was one sure thing about you, it was persistence. From that day forward, you didn’t leave Wonwoo’s side, spending your lunch under the autumn sun and playing games on his switch.
…
october of junior year.
[10:00 p.m] [you: did you finish ur hw? :D] [wonwoo: yes. did u?] [you: nope :( it was hurting my brain so im watching nana] [wonwoo: nana?] [wonwoo: never heard of it] [you: omg…] [you: it’s the best anime ever!!] [wonwoo: i didn’t know u liked anime] [you: uve got a lot to learn abt me wons] [wonwoo: wons?] [you: my nickname for u obvs hehe] [*you changed wonwoo’s nickname to wons*] [wons: ok] [you: u should watch it. It WILL change your life] [wons: ok, maybe later. gotta go to bed. see u tmrw] [you: ok grandpa :p see u tmrw!!] [you: bring ur switch!] [wons: sure. bye.]
…
“Wonwoo! Wait up for me,” you hollered, waving your hand in the air even though his back was facing towards you.
Turning around, Wonwoo stared blankly as you ran up to him. Halting his steps, he waited for you to catch up. The backpack you were wearing flops up and down as you picked up your speed.
The weather was colder now, and the leaves morphed into deeper shades of yellow and red. Wind whistling as you finally reached where he stood, you gave him a bright smile, so bright that it offset the gloomy sky.
“Morning,” he greeted you.
Air knocked out of your chest, and you folded over with your hands on your knees, trying to calm your racing heartbeat. Wonwoo grasped your elbow to help, but this didn’t help your already out-of-breath state. His touch caused sparks to erupt under your skin. Luckily, the commotion caused by your run concealed your nerves.
“Why didn’t you tell me we lived on the same street?” you heaved while Wonwoo used his grip to help you stand straight.
“How was I supposed to know?” he rebutted.
Rolling your eyes at him, you knew he was right. But if you had known sooner, you could’ve spent your previous mornings walking with him to school.
“Can we walk to school together from now on then?” you batted your eyelashes at him, shooting him a sweet smile.
“I don’t mind,” he shrugged his shoulders again.
You’ve found Wonwoo to be quite nonchalant, his reactions never more than a distant stare, a chuckle, or a shoulder shrug, no in between. Wonwoo’s lack of care for anything and everything is what endeared you the most. Despite his standoffish personality, you knew there was more to him deep down. He didn’t talk much, but his actions spoke louder than his words did.
…
november of junior year.
Thanks to your English teacher, Mr. Park, you and Wonwoo have been paired up for your biology project. Not only did that mean you would get to spend more time with Wonwoo but it also meant you secured a good grade for the assignment.
Science in general has never been your strong suit, but whenever you asked Wonwoo to explain the concepts to you, everything somehow made sense.
The walk to his house was nerve-wracking. It was the first time going over to a boy’s place, and the fact that it was Wonwoo made you even more anxious. He didn’t talk much about his family unless you asked. The only thing you knew was that he had an older brother named Seongho.
“Ma! I’m home,” Wonwoo greeted his mother, and you're taken aback by how loud his voice got.
Due to his introverted personality, Wonwoo didn’t talk at school unless spoken to, and it was exciting to finally see him in a setting where he was comfortable.
His mom poked her head out from the kitchen and gave you both a warm smile. Patting her hands off the apron, she immediately pulled you into a hug. She smelt like lavender and vanilla, giving off a homey aroma.
“Wonwoo! You didn’t tell me you got a girlfriend,” she exclaimed, pinching her son’s cheek.
Wonwoos's face flared red, and he retracted from his mother's touch. “She’s not my girlfriend. We have a project to work on.”
“Oops! Sorry. You two had better get to work then. I’ll call you when the food is ready. You’ll stay for dinner, right dear?” She beamed down at you.
“If you and Wonwoo don’t mind, then I can,” you grinned at her while Wonwoo was urging you upstairs.
“Of course, I don’t mind. It’s nice to see my little Wonwoo making friends at his new school,” she cooed at her son, which had him rolling his eyes.
“Mom, I’m sixteen,” Wonwoo groaned, discreetly stepping towards the direction of his room.
“Thanks, Mrs. Jeon!” you responded as Wonwoo dragged you by the wrist, hauling you along with him.
His fingers are wrapped around your forearm, trying to get you away from his Mom as fast as he could.
The moment you stepped into his room, you found it cleaner than an average teenage boy’s would be. Your eyes panned over his space, spotting the gaming pc in the corner. Marvelling at the RGB lighting, you gasped at the clicky-ness of the keyboard.
“Woah… this is so cool!” you gushed, tapping random keys to feel the switches underneath.
“I guess,” Wonwoo muttered, shutting the door behind him.
The closed door muffled any sound from outside his room, and you were left alone with Wonwoo and the silence he brought along with him.
“Your mom is really nice,” you chirped.
Wonwoo responded with a shrug of his shoulders. Classic. Instead of saying anything more, he took the poster board out of his bag and placed it on his bed.
“We should get started,” Wonwoo said firmly.
You could only sigh at how serious he was about school. Of course, you knew the importance of diligence when it comes to projects and assignments, but you felt that this was the perfect time to learn more about your new friend.
Sitting beside him on his bed, you crossed your legs and took the large biology textbook out of the bag alongside your laptop.
“Inherited genes and Sickle-cell anemia, sounds boring,” you huffed.
Wonwoo ignored your statement and grabbed the textbook from you to look up information that would help with your project.
“Don’t you think we’re working on this too early? We have like…two weeks,” you whined.
“The sooner we get this over with the better,” he nipped, flipping the pages without a single glance over at you.
The brightness of your laptop illuminated Wonwoo’s dim room. Aside from the computer and his bedside lamp, the rest of his lights were off. Opening up the doc, you couldn’t help but sneak glances over at him.
Wonwoo fixed his glasses, pushing the frames up his tall nose. You couldn’t stop yourself from staring. There was something about him that made him undeniably handsome, your teenage brain couldn’t comprehend it.
“Y’know Mr. Park is pretty chill. We don’t have to do this all in one night.”
“I know,” Wonwoo muttered, still reading the textbook, looking for information to cite for your project.
Wonwoo could feel your eyes focused on him, but he ignored them, pretending to read the words on the page instead. Wonwoo didn’t mind that you had a habit of staring at him, but he didn’t know how to spark conversation. You were quite talkative, so he decided that it was better for you to take the lead.
Putting up with his adamance, the two of you worked on your project for a good hour before you decided that the words "sickle cell" and "genes" were hurting your eyes.
“Can we take a break, it feels like my brain is going to pop out of my skull,” you sighed, flopping against his mattress.
Wonwoo shot you a scolding expression but gave in to your wishes. And like a lightbulb had gone off in your head, you quickly got back up. Furiously typing on your laptop, you go onto the illegal site where you had NANA bookmarked.
“How about we watch an episode? You haven’t started it yet right?” you enquired, looking at him with the biggest grin on your face.
“I haven’t, no,” he answered you.
With a squeal, you clicked on the first episode while making yourself comfortable. Wonwoo moved next to you, and excitement coursed through your veins. His warmth radiated off him, and the feeling of him sitting so close made butterflies erupt within you.
Despite Wonwoo’s reluctance to take a break from schoolwork, you found him genuinely interested in the show. Nothing could compare to the feeling of sitting in silence with him, just enjoying his presence as NANA played on your laptop.
For the rest of your self-declared break, you and Wonwoo got through the first two episodes.
There was a part of you that wondered if he could hear how fast your heart was racing, being that close to him. But you felt daring in that moment, allowing yourself to rest your head against his shoulder. Wonwoo stiffened slightly at your proximity but didn’t budge. If anything, he relaxed further. So you stayed in that position, if he could hear your thumping pulse, you didn’t care.
“Well, what do you think?” you looked up at him, curious about his first impression.
“It’s good. Nana seems very naive though,” he disclosed, pushing his glasses up once again.
“Hmm, interesting. The plot gets better the more you watch, so I hope you’ll give it a chance,” you gave him a shy smile which he returned.
Any other person probably would’ve refused to watch this show with you. Knowing Wonwoo, he was more into shounen than shoujo or slice of life. Yet, he spent an hour watching an anime that was out of his usual genre. It made you feel safe. Safe enough to talk about your interests without worrying whether or not he’d find you bothersome.
“Sure. I think I liked it enough to watch on my own,” he admitted.
“Wait. Really?” you gasped, shocked that he enjoyed it.
“Yeah. At least then we have more to talk about,” he specified.
The smile on your face broadened, and you leaned into him even more as you both stared ahead, starting the third episode. Once again, he didn’t stop you. Instead, Wonwoo wrapped his arm around your shoulder pulling you closer to him.
“You’re a good friend Wons,” you confirmed.
“And you’re my only friend,” he confessed, patting your shoulder.
“Don't worry. I’ll always be your friend,” you mumbled before staring deeply into his eyes.
Wonwoo chuckled at your words, nodding his head in agreement.
“I feel like I should be the one saying that,” he mused, his thumb rubbing circles into your skin.
“It’s okay. I’m glad I decided to sit next to you on the first day of school,” you laughed, reminiscing about that warm September day.
“I’m glad too.”
After that day, Wonwoo had become more comfortable with talking to you about the things he didn’t share with others. He made you feel special. Although you had close friends like Seokmin and Mingyu during your first two years in high school, there were parts about yourself that you knew you couldn’t unveil to them.
It wasn’t that they were judgmental or bad friends; Wonwoo just brought out something different in you. Although it took a while to break him out of his shell, he continued to reveal more about himself the more time you spent with him.
The closeness that you two shared that night in his bedroom, watching NANA on your laptop sparked a flame inside you. Wonwoo took over every crevice of your mind, his scent, his touch, even if it was a mere hand on your shoulders, you didn’t want to go a day without him. Life was meaningless before you met Wonwoo, a blur of memories you couldn’t pinpoint. Now that he was with you, you didn’t want to ever go back to a time when he was not by your side.
chapter three, present time.
Sunlight pours through your curtains, hitting your eyes with a blinding sheen. The ache of last night's decisions trickles down your head and into the tense muscles of your shoulders. You can only curse your past self for drinking way more than your limit allows.
Whatever had happened last night felt straight out of a movie, especially because it had caused you to dream about Wonwoo finally being yours. As you recollect the memories of yesterday, the pang in your heart intensifies.
The oddly vivid visions of you and Wonwoo cuddling under blankets leave a bitter taste in your mouth. It felt so real you could almost smell the faint lingering scent of his cologne on your sheets. But alas, it was just another drunken fantasy you wish you could live in.
“I’ll love you even if there is no tomorrow.”
You almost scoff at how cheesy you sounded in your dream. What kind of fool speaks this articulate after countless shots of tequila?
The sounds of pots clanging brings you out of your thoughts, and you practically jump off your mattress and run to the entrance of your room. Placing an ear against the thick wood, you listen carefully for signs of an intruder. There’s a grunt that resounds through your apartment and has sirens blaring in your mind. You must’ve been very drunk last night, and stupid enough to leave your door unlocked.
There was nothing in your bedroom that could be of use to you in a situation like this. Except for the dildo that June gifted you for your birthday last year. With a defeated sigh, you decided that it was needed during this life-or-death situation. Opening up your drawer you carefully take out the pink sparkly dildo that was still left in its packaging, gripping it tightly as you burst through the door.
Screaming, you lunge towards the intruder’s large frame with your eyes shut tight, smacking him repeatedly with the phallic piece of plastic.
“Get out! You freak! Get out!” You shriek, hitting his back with a large thump.
The intruder groans in pain, the sound of his discomfort all too familiar. Halting your assault on his naked back, you open your eyes. Only for your sight to befall an extremely muscular and shirtless Wonwoo.
“Ow! What the fuck?” Wonwoo grunts, turning around to see your smaller frame gripping a bright pink dildo.
His eyes widen with recognition, adjusting his glasses, he chuckles at you and your dishevelled state. The sex toy in your hand falls to the ground as you stare at him with an expression filled with not only pure shock but horror.
Never in your life did you think that Wonwoo would be the one standing shirtless in your kitchen. The idea of someone breaking into your house seems more plausible than whatever is happening before your eyes right now.
“I’m tryna make you breakfast, and this is how you repay me?” Wonwoo laughs, grabbing the toy from your kitchen floor and placing it down on the counter.
“I-Uhm. It’s a gift! Yeah,” you stutter, “June gave me it last year as a gift. It’s unused, I promise.”
Wonwoo quirks an eyebrow at you, stepping forward, crowding you with his large chest. The counter hits your back and you find yourself caged between the granite and Wonwoo’s naked upper half.
“So you used it to hit me instead?” Wonwoo deducts, his palms gripping the counter so you have nowhere left to run.
Despite the awkward situation you put yourself in, your mind is elsewhere now that Wonwoo has you in his hold. The words that you want to come out of your mouth are clogged with Wonwoo’s bare chest, the only thing you’re able to focus on.
“W-well, I thought you were breaking in so,” you start but Wonwoo cuts you off.
“Do you not remember what happened last night, darling?” He asks you, and the breath in your throat is caught.
“Last night? I-I thought that was a dream,” you mutter, still staring deeply into his eyes.
Sighing, Wonwoo pushes the loose strand of hair behind your ear before cupping your cheek. His thumb moves languidly against your skin while you lean into his touch even more.
“No. It wasn’t a dream. I told you I loved you last night and I meant it,” he clarifies, earnest with his confession.
“I love you too,” the words spill out of your mouth effortlessly, like you were meant to tell him all along.
Grinning down at you, Wonwoo places a gentle kiss on your lips. His large hands cupping your face as he does so.
Pulling back he smiles at you once again, satisfied with the one little peck that he had given you. But you can’t help but pout. You wanted more from him, but there was a lot to address than just the feelings you two shared last night.
Like the dildo suctioned to your counter, for example.
“Why are you shirtless?” you ask, starting with the first thing in front of you.
“Because darling, you’re wearing my shirt,” answering nonchalantly as he turns back to hand you a plate of eggs and bacon.
Oh, right. You look down at the white shirt that’s draped over your frame. Dumbfounded, you mumble a quick thanks before nibbling on the food he gave you.
Wonwoo grips your hand, pulling you to sit down on the couch with him. You weren’t sure what else to say, opting to focus on the food in front of you instead. If there was something Wonwoo wanted to mention, you gave him the time to do so.
“You probably don’t remember me helping you get ready for bed. You were kinda out of it once we got home,” he explains.
With your legs crossed on the sofa, you nod, processing the information before waiting for him to continue.
Wiping the corner of your mouth, Wonwoo’s lips are upturned into a fond smile. Your cheeks grow hot as he continues to stare.
“Whatever happened last night wasn’t a dream. I do love you, I mean it. I want to be yours if you’ll give me a chance,” he professes.
All while you’re sitting there eating strips of bacon and a couple of eggs. You had been mistaken to think that last night was some fever dream because this moment is more fitting.
For anyone else, eating while Wonwoo is admitting his love for you would be odd, and out of the ordinary. But this felt natural somehow like a different version of you in some other universe has already experienced it.
“I just want to be yours, Wonwoo.” you sigh, placing your plate on the coffee table.
Inching closer to him, you place yourself on his lap, your hands circling his broad shoulders. Your head makes itself at home in the dip between his shoulder and neck as you breathe in his cologne.
Lazy Sunday Morning. Your favourite.
“I’ve always just wanted to be yours,” your voice is meek, muffled from hiding your face against his skin.
Wonwoo’s hand rubs up and down the expanse of your back, and you relax under his touch. Completely disarmed under the daze of your subsiding headache and the steady inhale and exhale of his breath.
Nothing else in the world matters to you when you’re in his hold. Outside disruptions are muted, the only thing that can be heard is your heart pounding within the confines of your chest.
Pulling back from where your head was resting, you drink in Wonwoo’s every feature. The ones that you’ve memorized and the ones you’ve missed from never being this close to him. You want to know all of him, want to feel and see all of him.
With the most delicate of motions, you place your lips over his. There’s a ruggedness to his skin, yet he feels so gentle against you all at the same time. The softness of love that you’ve never experienced before. There haven’t been many instances where you’ve got to kiss someone so deeply, yet it’s the least of your worries. All that matters to you now is Wonwoo.
He tightens his grip on your waist, pulling you closer to him, which almost seemed impossible. But he makes it happen anyway, clutching onto you like his life depended on it.
“Wonwoo.” Pulling away, you whimper breathlessly, wanting more and more of him.
The sweet sounds that erupt from you cause a groan to leave his throat, crashing his lips against yours once again. The tenderness that was evident before is overtaken by the heat of lust. Like tides to an ocean, Wonwoo kisses you with full force, and you don’t care if you can barely breathe or if your heart is suddenly going into overdrive. You’d rather suffocate in his grasp than go another minute without him all over you.
“You’re fucking perfect, darling,” Wonwoo whispers in your ear, his lips trailing down your cheek and down to your neck.
Your head lolls with pleasure, feeling him press hot kisses against your scorching skin. Tiny licks here and there that force your eyes to roll back, you find purchase in his black locks, tugging at them in an attempt to ground yourself.
“Be my girlfriend. Be mine, please,” Wonwoo speaks in hushed tones, his lips searing against the shell of your ear.
You moan out, nodding your head as his hand moves down to squeeze the meat of your ass. He pulls you right onto his hardening length, your sleep shorts leaving nothing up to the imagination. The hands he has placed on your bottom forces you to drag your hips back and forth against his clothed dick.
“Yes, I want it so bad. I wanna be yours, forever,” you sigh, mustering up enough brainpower to answer him.
Before you two could get any further the shrill of a ringtone brings you out of your lustful state. Wonwoo refuses to let you go, instead, he keeps you firmly on his lap while he answers the phone.
You can’t help but giggle at how frustrated he looks. Eyebrows furrowed with a disappointed frown on his swollen lips. He’s still hard against you, and the thought of teasing him while he’s speaking to someone over the phone seems like a brilliant idea.
“What do you want, Jeonghan?” Wonwoo grumbles, his hand moving under your shorts to squeeze you properly.
While his hand massages into the fat, you kiss up his neck while rubbing yourself against his clothed cock. His voice becomes strained, attempting to cover up the sounds of pleasure he’s emitting with a cough.
“What? You had to call me just for that?” Wonwoo seethes, yet he continues to play with your ass as he takes his call. As if you’re some type of stress ball to relieve his vexation.
“No. She’s right beside me,” he mumbles and you perk up now that his attention is back on you.
Grabbing the phone that he’s holding, you greet Jeonghan through the speaker.
“Hi Hannie!”
“Hi, beautiful. Are you down to go to my place tonight? Everyone’s coming over,” Jeonghan explains, his voice like honey.
Wonwoo rolls his eyes at the pet names, clearly unamused by his friend's flirty personality. Without a second to waste, he dives into the skin at the base of your neck, trickling down to your exposed shoulder where the collar of his shirt fails to cover.
“O-of course! We’ll see you later, okay?” you stutter, unable to focus with Wonwoo all over you.
“Got it! Don’t be late, love you!” He says his goodbyes before hanging up.
“Love you too!”
Wonwoo stops in his tracks, his eyes piercing into yours, deadly and swirling with desire. The phone in your hand is discarded somewhere on the floor before he grabs your face, pinching you with his thumb and index finger.
“You’ve got a lot of nerve baby, teasing me like that. Telling Jeonghan you love him,” Wonwoo spits, but there's amusement behind his serious tone.
“M’sorry, I’ll make it up to you later, okay? I want to get ready for Jeonghan’s thing,” you smile at him cheekily as you release yourself from his hold.
“Oh I’m sure you will,” he huffs, but lets you go anyway.
Acting unaffected, you get up from his lap, running to the bathroom to start a shower while you leave Wonwoo hot and bothered on the couch. You can’t help but giggle to yourself, excited for whatever awaits you later on.
The pain and undeniable suffering you had gone through seemed like a memory of the past. The years of yearning for your best friend are nothing but another fever dream. At least you wish it was all a dream, but now that you have Wonwoo in this reality, you don’t want to let him go.
It's almost laughable how quickly things can change overnight, it felt like yesterday you were crying yourself to sleep over Wonwoo not reciprocating your feelings, and now you have him shirtless on the couch after a very hot make-out session.
This must be what your heart was telling you all along. This must be what was beyond the dark water of the unknown. You’re thankful you took the plunge because the risk of unveiling your true feelings has given you something undeniably saccharine in return.
Kiss it Better.
chapter one.
When Wonwoo met you for the first time, he couldn’t help but find you annoying. You had a habit of sticking to his side when he chose to spend time alone, but in hindsight, it brought him more joy than annoyance.
He had always been a shy kid and preferred to sit alone at lunch playing games or reading. But when you came into his life, he realized that some company isn’t so bad after all.
Now that he’s older, and the two of you have grown together, he wouldn’t replace your presence for anyone else. There was something about your personality that made him feel comfortable. It wasn’t long before Wonwoo found a home within you, from your bright smile to your incessant need to play Super Smash Bros each lunch period. He’s thankful he had decided to let the walls he built up come down for the sake of your friendship.
…
It wasn’t long before the two of you arrived at Jeonghan’s apartment. The door was left unlocked for others to come and go as they pleased. Music was blasting from his surround-sound speakers. Wonwoo wasn’t sure how his friend was able to get away from noise complaints, but he decided that it wasn’t any of his business.
The only thing he was looking forward to was the look on Seokmin’s face once he saw that you were finally his.
Wonwoo didn’t care that it was selfish of him to arrive with you draped on his arm; he wanted everyone to know that you were off limits. He simply couldn’t wait to see the reactions that would erupt from his friends once he disclosed that he’d claimed his mark on you.
“Wonwoo!” Jeonghan calls out for him, standing by the island pouring drinks for him and Seungcheol.
His attention diverges, stalking over to his friends with your hand clasped in his. The small action doesn’t go unnoticed as he watches Jeonghan briefly glance over to your intertwined hands.
The pride brewing in his chest swells, you look irresistible and he knows what awaits him later on when you two get home. But he can indulge in his fantasy later, for now, he’ll settle for admiring your beauty in a more discreet way. Which wasn’t all that methodical in retrospect, because he can’t take his eyes off you.
Your skirt is short and the frilly lace top you’re wearing shows off your cleavage tastefully. If Wonwoo had it his way, he wouldn’t have let you out of your apartment till the sun was up the next morning.
“Hello, beautiful. You look amazing,” Jeonghan greets you, forcing you to take your hand out of his grasp to hug your extremely flirtatious friend.
The absence of your touch irked him, but he let you go, not wanting to startle the rest of the group with his growing possessiveness.
“Thank you, Hannie,” your voice muffles from being engulfed in Jeonghan’s arms.
“Alright, that’s enough,” Wonwoo gripes, clearly bothered with the way his friend is holding you.
“You’re no fun,” Jeonghan rolls his eyes, before whispering something incoherent in your ear, causing a giggle to erupt from your sweet lips.
Jeonghan lets go of you anyway, giving into Wonwoo’s sour attitude.
“You guys just got here! Don’t tell me you’re going to be grumpy the whole time,” Jeonghan teases.
“I’m not grumpy, you just have grabby hands and I don’t need you all over my girlfriend for the rest of the night,” Wonwoo grumbles bitterly, taking ahold of your wrist to pull you closer to him.
He sees the way you roll your eyes, but deep down he knows you enjoy how commanding he can become, especially with you.
“Girlfriend huh? That’s a big word for you,” Jeonghan laughs while raising his eyebrows.
“Jeonghan!” you gasp, amusement sparkling in your eyes.
Wonwoo gives the two of you an irritated look before pulling you away to greet the rest of your friends. You don’t protest the way he handles you and he takes note of that. Who knew you could be so pliant, even in social situations?
“You don’t have to worry about Jeonghan baby, you know how he is,” you murmur to him, shooting him a reassuring smile.
“I’m not worried about him, darling,” he huffs. Jeonghan is the least of his worries.
After what happened between you two this morning, Wonwoo can’t help but want you all for himself. God forbid you let Seokmin touch you the way he did. The mere thought of it made him feel sick.
He understands that he shouldn’t have thoughts about you with other people, especially because he knows you haven’t dated anyone officially before. But now that you’re his, he has to make sure it stays that way.
“Okay, but still. Just relax, I'm not going anywhere,” you reassure him.
Your gentle words and the soft squeeze you give him allow him to chill out a little more. He couldn’t help but be on high alert after what Seokmin put you through, after what he put you through.
Wonwoo has the constant reminder that you’re both here for a good time, and even though he might not be able to hold himself back once his eyes are set on Seokmin, he continues to obey your wishes.
Disappointment proceeds him as he feels you leave his side. Wonwoo lets go of you, allowing you to grab drinks from Jeonghan’s bar. Instead of wandering around like a loner, he sits on the couch, patiently waiting for your return.
“Hey, Wonwoo? Do you remember me?” a girl’s voice brings him out of his thoughts.
Turning to the person who forces themselves into the seat next to him, he frowns at her. She didn’t illuminate the room the way you did, and her voice was unpleasant to his ears.
“No. Sorry,” he kept his response curt, not wanting to entertain the faceless stranger who was attempting to flirt with him.
“It’s me? Josh’s friend. We met at Seokmin’s place last time,” she continued to press, and Wonwoo could feel his ears growing hot with annoyance.
“Oh, right.”
A hand is placed on his shoulder and he flinches away, he doesn’t want anyone but you touching him. It almost makes him want to throw up.
“I have a girlfriend,” he quips, not wanting to prolong the interaction any longer.
The girl beside him cackles, and Wonwoo really can’t stand the sound of her voice.
“That’s never stopped me,” her voice lowers an octave in an attempt to sound seductive but Wonwoo feels nothing but repulsed by her very being.
He moves further away from her, evidently angry with the way she’s coming onto him. Cursing at himself inside his mind, he should’ve never flirted with her to begin with. The puzzle pieces start to slowly align as he remembers that night at Seokmin’s place. It was that night that you went home without him, and the realization hit him like a truck.
A part of him always wondered what moment had been your breaking point, and there she was, sitting right beside him.
“I really don’t care,” Wonwoo doesn’t spare another glance, escaping her suffocating presence to search for you.
Stopping in his tracks, he watches as Seokmin comes up to you, clearly apprehensive as you search Jeonghan’s fridge for a spare Diet Coke. The music is blaring, and the sheer volume of the speakers drowns out Seokmin’s voice.
He watches as you start to notice that someone is talking to you, trying to get your attention. Wonwoo can see the pained expression in your eyes, and he can’t even blame you. Seokmin was your friend before he even met you, and he can’t even fathom the pain you’re feeling from losing someone so close to you.
Sure, he understands the depth of your relationship with Seokmin, but that doesn’t stop the fury that is forcing its way through his veins. Smoke practically comes out of his nose and ears as he watches everything unfold before his very eyes.
Seokmin is visibly trying to reason with you, his lips moving at lightning speed as you stand there holding your drink close to your chest. Every bone in Wonwoo’s body wants to go up to you and snatch you away as fast as possible. But he can’t help but relish in the sight of Seokmin so desperate for your attention. It’s satisfying to see your reactions morph from sorrow to anger the longer you’re frozen in your place.
The second he sees tears beginning to well up in your eyes is the moment Wonwoo finally decides to take action.
Marching up to you, he pulls you by the waist until you are glued to him. With a firm hand, he squeezes you tightly, staking his claim in front of Seokmin.
“I’m sorr—,” the words Seokmin so desperately wants to say are cut off by Wonwoo’s presence.
Wonwoo’s lips press into a thin line, gazing down at him with nothing but a look of disgust, and also triumph. Seokmin seems to realize he’s lost because he steps back slowly, shaking his head as his shoulders slouch with defeat.
Wonwoo has won, and Seokmin can’t do anything to get in his way anymore.
“I don’t know why you think you’re allowed to talk to her, but you should leave her alone from now on,” Wonwoo seethes, gaze unwavering.
“Whatever man,” is all Seokmin can say before retreating into the crowd.
Wonwoo turns you slightly, hand placed delicately on your cheek, scanning your features to make sure that you’re alright.
“You okay darling?” he asks, before pecking your lips.
“I’m okay. I don’t wanna be here anymore, can we go home?” you squeak, your voice faltering.
Wonwoo hates to see you affected by someone so unimportant like Seokmin.
He doesn’t think for another second before agreeing with your request. Bidding Jeonghan farewell while holding tightly onto your hand. Before either of you knew it, you were out the door and on the way back home.
The unsavoury moments that happened while at Jeonghan’s place are gone with the wind as Wonwoo speeds down the road and back to your apartment.
“Thank you for earlier, I was so in shock I couldn’t even move or speak,” you mutter, grabbing his palm and placing it on your cheek.
Wonwoo feels your warmth and glances at you pouting as you stare out at the empty road.
“It’s alright darling, you’re here now, that asshole is not going anywhere near you anymore,” Wonwoo reassures you as he takes your hand in his, giving you a comforting squeeze in an attempt to soothe the thoughts he knows are running through your head.
The moment Wonwoo reaches your building, he quickly parks the car before running to the passenger side to open your door. His hand is out in front of him for you to hold while you take a step, doing everything he can to distract you from what happened.
Once the front door of your apartment closes behind him, you turn around with a cheeky smile. It almost gives him whiplash at how quickly your mood changes.
“I didn’t peg you as the possessive type,” you remark, eyes glinting against the dim lighting of your living room lamp.
“I'm not. But it’s different with you, darling,” he admits.
Wonwoo rarely felt jealousy in his previous relationships, he knew he was in control either way. Although he knows how much you love him, he still finds himself peeved when someone other than him is close to you. There's a fire within him that he couldn’t extinguish, one that only you could put out.
“You gonna give me what you promised earlier,” Wonwoo’s voice lowers an octave, crowding your smaller frame.
He towers over you while watching the way your eyes shine over with intrigue. The image of you moaning for him is a vision he can’t erase from his mind, a vision he wishes he could replay over and over.
“Depends. Were you jealous about Seokmin coming up to me?” you press, slender fingers tracing circles into his chest.
Your touch felt like a crackling fire under his skin, Wonwoo’s thoughts were depleted of anything that could distract his awakening need to ravish you.
“I think you know the answer to that already.”
Stepping closer to you, he places both his hands on your waist, pulling you in until you’re flush against him. His breath trails against your skin as he breathes you in, wanting to memorize the sweet notes of your perfume. The smell of lemon blossom and amber engulfs his senses.
Amyris Femme. His favourite.
You have always known how much he loves the smell of it on you. It’s simply addictive and intoxicating. Everything about you is always so sweet, from your honeyed eyes to your heavenly voice, the moans you exude dripping in sugar. From head to toe, you are everything Wonwoo’s ever wanted to indulge in, wanting to experience the high of you with all seven senses.
He’s convinced that some higher power has sculpted you into everything he’s ever asked for. The universe had known all his preferences, and all his interests and bottled them up into one person. You.
You. You. You.
His.
His darling.
Cradling your cheek, he presses his lips against yours, truly savouring every brush of skin against yours. Drinking in your sweet scent through his taste and sense of smell. The longer the two of you stand there and make out, the more passionate it becomes.
Wonwoo pushes himself against you even further, until he’s sure you can feel his already hardening length grow between you.
You own him in so many ways, in ways you probably wouldn’t be able to comprehend. From his heart to his very soul, he’s yours. And he wants to show you how much of an effect you have on him. Wonwoo wants to show you how crazy you make him.
Taking the lead, Wonwoo doesn’t relinquish his hold on you as you two slowly move to your bedroom. Opening the door while he leaves wet kisses up and down your neck with the goal of leaving marks against your delicate skin.
“Wonwoo,” you sigh, your smaller hands gripping his biceps as he lays you down on the bed.
Wonwoo doesn’t rush, taking his time to strip you of your clothes. His hands breeze against the bare skin of your stomach, pulling up your top along the way. Eyes zeroing in on the black lace that’s clad against your breasts, he can feel the drool starting to pool in his mouth.
Your skirt is next, and with a hawk eye, he watches the way you lift your hips as he brings down the one thing that's obstructing him from completely devouring you.
“Please, I wanna go faster,” you whine, squirming under his touch.
Wonwoo refuses, he needs this moment to seep into his brain until it’s all he can see when his eyes are closed. The desperation emitting from you is almost tangible, but he can’t bring himself to waste a precious second.
One leg after the other, and finally you’re bare, partially exposed under his body.
Ready. Waiting.
“I wanna savour you, darling,” Wonwoo’s baritone voice reverberates against the four walls that enclose the both of you.
You sigh with annoyance and it only intrigues Wonwoo further. He never thought your brattiness would translate to the bedroom. How naive of him to think otherwise. Excitement courses through his veins, imagining all the fun he’s about to have with you.
“Just fuck me please, I wanna feel you inside me,” you whisper in his ear, bringing him closer to you.
“Holy shit, you can’t talk like that or I’ll have to give you what you want.” He groans, hooked on how sexy you sound.
The cheeky smile you give him returns, and he’s bewitched by your beautiful features. Fully naked before him except for your bra and panties.
Pinning you against the bed, Wonwoo regains control over his thoughts, the same thoughts that are screaming at him to take you in one go. He rebukes those sentiments, he knows what he wants.
He knows what you need.
“But I wanna know what it’s like. I know you wanna fuck me, so just do it.”
Wonwoo almost loses his vision with the mere utterance of your words. How much of a nymph do you become once you’re horny? Something about the way you speak is so saccharine, putting him in a trance. You could force him into murdering someone with that tone, and he would do it with a smile on his face.
“You’re gonna have to try harder than that, baby,” his voice strains, the control he once had starting to lose itself within your lustful gaze.
Thinking of ways to stop you from saying anything more, he rips your panties off in one go. Nimble fingers graze against your plush thighs, squeezing and pinching where he can.
The whimper you let out is nothing but music to his ears. Seeing you desperate for his touch causes him to focus on his end goal. He wants you to unravel before him, deflowering you till you’re fucked out and panting his name.
As he spreads your legs, he can’t help but allow his nose to trail against your inner thighs, inhaling the scent of your body emitted under the heat of his touch. He doesn’t stop until he’s at the apex of your sex, glasses fogged while the bridge of his nose is rubbing against your skin.
Wonwoo finally allows himself to dive in. Ripping the frames off his face, teasing your folds with wet, hot kisses. He repeats his actions till you're moaning deliriously under him.
“W-Wonwoo, please, fuck,” you cry out while he watches your hole clenching around nothing.
One of the hands that was holding your thighs down moves to your entrance, teasing you before he slowly inserts a finger inside you. Your head hits the pillows while your eyes are screwed shut, and Wonwoo relishes in your pleasure.
“God you’re so fucking tight, so wet,” Wonwoo mutters before licking at your clit.
Nothing is more euphoric than hearing you struggle to contain yourself. His boner getting harder to ignore as the juices from your pussy squelch with every thrust of his finger.
“Is that what you do when you touch yourself? Using your fingers to fuck this tiny hole?” He asks even though he knows you won’t be able to answer.
You’re too busy twitching from his hands on you, gripping onto the sheets to the point the threads look like they’re about to tear.
Wonwoo takes your silence as an answer before fully engulfing your cunt in his mouth. Practically making out with your pussy lips, he licks and rubs your sensitive heat till you writhe against him.
“You taste so good darling,” he mutters before taking a deep inhale of your musk, “no one’s ever touched you like this huh?”
“N-no. Just you,” you squeak.
“Good girl.”
Hooking your legs over his shoulders, his free hand moves up your body till he’s able to grope at your breasts. The feeling of the lace covering your pert nipples motivates him to make you cum faster.
Your body vibrates within his hold while he resumes eating you out. Dipping his tongue into your entrance as his thumb goes to rub your clit in sharp circles. He can feel your abdomen retract from his actions. You're close.
It’s only a matter of time before your juices begin to pour out of your pussy, flooding his mouth with sweet nectar. Wonwoo fully believes he could get drunk from the taste of your cum, the liquid gold dripping down his chin as he slurps and nips at your puffy bundle of nerves.
“This pussy is mine,” he concludes, slapping your dripping core.
Eyes drunk with lust, he smiles up at you. A smirk filled with pride as you’re left twitching against the mattress. Hair displaced against the pillowcases, skin glistening under the nebulous light of your lamp.
Your room is filled with the aroma of sex and sweat, your chest heaving up and down as you come down from your high. Wonwoo’s length straining against his pants, he can’t neglect his need to fuck you for any second longer.
Laying there, winded from your orgasm, he lets you watch him as he removes the clothes covering his body until there’s nothing left. Wonwoo’s abs and muscular arms flex as he releases himself from his tight pants. He clasps his palm around his cock, rubbing himself while staring down at your fucked out state. Grunts erupt from his throat while he rubs the bead of pre cum dripping down his tip.
You stare at him, eyes lidded, before sitting up to take off your last piece of clothing. Your breasts bounce as you release them from the confines of your bra. The tip of your fingers graze your nipples, playing with them while Wonwoo stands over you, stroking himself.
He’s so in deep, it’s the first time in a long time that he’s felt like he’s about to combust in seconds. He hasn’t even been inside of you yet, but he knows he could cum untouched at just the sight of you playing with yourself in front of him.
“Will you fuck me now? Wanna feel you cum inside me,” you plead with doe eyes, your other hand coming down to your heat.
He watches you insert a finger in yourself, pumping in and out, matching the rhythm of his movements.
Before you can let out another sound of delight, Wonwoo halts whatever he’s doing to flip you around. With you on your stomach, he focuses all his attention on your plump ass. Groping you with rough palms, and your hips fly off the bed to give him better access.
Retracting his hand, he comes down to you even harder. The slap on your skin echoes throughout your room. You squeak but he can see the juices starting to gush out of your pussy.
Fuck, Wownoo is obsessed. Obsessed with your neediness, obsessed with the way your ass jiggles with every strike he lands on you. He simply can’t wait to be inside you, engulfed in the heat of your tight walls.
“Hngh, Wonwoo!” you almost scream, your voice becoming nasally every time he hits you.
The hand marks on your soft skin drive him crazy, and he knows that if he doesn’t fuck you soon, he’ll cum prematurely.
“What a needy little thing. You want it that bad huh?” he taunts, spreading your ass cheeks, watching the wetness drip down to your thighs.
“Please, take me please,” you continue to beg, your voice level as you stare at him over your shoulder.
Your hips cant back and forth, waving your tight pussy in front of him. Enticing him to fuck you.
“You’re a fucking brat, you know that?” Wonwoo grunts, slapping your sopping hole.
Jerking forward, you let out a salacious moan, eyebrows furrowing as you slump back down onto the bed.
“I’m being so patient, baby. Just stick your cock in me please,” you fuss, lifting your hips again.
Wonwoo sighs, turning you over once again so you’re on your back.
“You’re lucky I love you,” he grunts, grabbing your legs and pulling you towards him.
Sitting on his haunches, he spreads you out, getting the perfect view of your glistening entrance. Taking his dick in his hand, he rubs the tip against your folds. You match his thrusts, moving up as he envelopes the underside of his length between your soaking lips. The sounds emitting from your bodies connecting is sinful and Wonwoo’s jaw goes slack, finally feeling your heat against his manhood.
“God, this pussy.”
“Wonwoo, fuck me,” you whimper, grabbing his biceps to pull him against you.
Engulfing you into a heated kiss, he continues to slide his cock along your slit. The sheer wetness of your pussy lubricates him enough to move with a rushed pace. He’s not even inside you yet and he’s already starting to feel that knot form in his lower stomach.
“You gonna be a good girl? Show me how bad you want this cock inside you?” he whispers, lips brushing along your own.
“Yes. fuck yes,” you pant breathlessly.
Slotting his arm between the two of you, he finally aligns his length with your entrance. He can feel you trying to get him inside you, thrusting up slightly to try and catch the tip so it pushes into your awaiting heat.
But before you can get away with your tricks, he slaps your thighs. Wonwoo’s large hand presses you down firmly before you can get any further.
“Liar. You said you were gonna be a good girl,” he spits, “don’t get impatient or I'm gonna leave you lying here without cumming again.”
You pout at his words. Your cheeks are hot, and your eyes are teary. The things you make him feel, it’s unmatched.
“Gonna breed this little cunt till you're stuffed full,” he groans, finally inserting his dick inside your heat.
The gasp you let out is high-pitched. And Wonwoo’s head falls against the space within the dip of your shoulder. His hands are firm against your waist, thrusting into you until he’s fully sheathed in your pussy. Being inside you was like dipping into molten lava, the heat of your cunt enveloping him with such a tight grip he almost faints upon entering you.
“How are you so tight?” Wonwoo curses. “You feel so good, baby.”
He didn’t expect you to be gripping his cock like this. It’s like nothing he’s ever felt before. Your pussy is made for him with how snugly he fits inside you.
“It’s so big, fuck!” you moan, breathing heavily.
Wonwoo doesn’t give you enough time to adjust to his length, even though he should. Blinded by searing hot pleasure, he begins to pound in and out of you. Skin slapping as his thrusts become erratic. With eyes rolling to the back of your head, you pull at his strands of hair and he groans at the pain that mixes with the high your cunt gives him.
At that moment, Wonwoo concludes that he doesn’t want anyone but you. For as long as he can, he wants to be the only one to fuck you, to give you orgasm after orgasm. Until you're spent and in and out of consciousness, he wants to be the only one who can make you feel this way.
As if a curse is placed on him, your phone buzzes against your nightstand. Seokmin’s contact is on clear display for both of you to see. Wonwoo ceases his movements, sitting up and grabbing your phone from the nightstand.
“Answer it,” he speaks firmly.
“What?”
“You heard me. Answer it and show him I’m the only one who can make you feel this good.”
There’s a flash of panic in your eyes, but Wonwoo knows you’ll obey his wishes anyway. He knows how deeply you’ve fallen for him. You can’t refuse him despite the compromising circumstances, and he’ll continue to use it to his advantage.
Length still buried to the hilt inside you, you swipe at your phone to answer. Wonwoo presses the speaker button before resuming his rushed pace. Bullying your hole while you attempt to at least seem coherent enough to answer Seokmin.
“Seokmin?” You whisper, trying your best to conceal the moans that are threatening to slip past your lips.
“Hey. I just wanted to call and say sorry about earlier. That was stupid of me—,” Seokmin attempts to get his apology in but he’s cut off by your moans.
Wonwoo slaps your clit while thrusting inside you, his length enveloped in your velvety walls.
“You okay?” Seokmin asks you, and Wonwoo’s satisfied by the scene in front of him.
You’re flustered and trying your best not to reveal that you’re being fucked hard by your boyfriend, while your ex-friend is trying to reconnect with you. Key word, trying.
“Tell him you don’t want to ever see him again,” Wonwoo grunts out as he continues to fill you up deliciously, thrusting inside you hard enough that Seokmin could probably hear it over the phone.
“Fuck! Wonwoo! ‘M sorry Seokmin, but I don’t want you to talk to me anymore. Please, don’t contact me again.” Whimpers escape your lips and Seokmin stutters over the speaker.
Wonwoo knows that Seokmin is aware of what’s happening on your side of the phone call. The line goes dead the moment you utter your last words to him.
“Bet you liked that huh? You like it when I show everyone that you’re mine?” Wonwoo emphasizes while he continues to push past your entrance.
“Yes. Shit,” you mewl out, clenching your walls against his thick cock.
The ridges of your pussy massage Wonwoo in the most perfect way. Throwing his head back the slightest bit, he watches how his dick moves in and out of you. The creamy ring of your mixed juices pooling at the end of his hardness only arouses him further.
“You gonna let me cum inside you?” Wonwoo questions, not to ask, but to make sure you’re prepared to feel his seed seeping into you.
“Mhm. I wanna feel you fill me up,” you let out a breathy moan.
Tossing you onto your stomach, Wonwoo pulls out and grapples you into the position he wants you in. Clutching onto your hips, he sits on his heels while forcing you onto his thighs. Your back against his chest, head lazing back onto his shoulder while Wonwoo’s muscular bicep wraps around your neck, placing you into a headlock.
Entering your abused cunt once again, he assaults your pussy with enough force and strength to send you into another dimension. Wonwoo bounces you on his cock and you’re screaming his name at this point. His balls slap against your ass cheeks, while the juices from your hole drip down and onto his thighs.
“I-I’m gonna cum,” you wail, your walls spasming.
Wonwoo's balls retract while your pussy pulsates, your cum coating his dick. He pumps into you one more time until his sticky release fills your walls. The flood of semen overflowing while his red tip kisses your cervix, holding you firmly in place as he continues to cum inside you.
“Hmph, it’s so good. Your cock feels so good,” your words are slurred as Wonwoo releases you from the headlock.
Body slumping over, you push your ass in the air, giving Wonwoo the most delectable view of his cum overflowing past the lips of your bruised cunt. The thick white substance comes out in globs as you lay down with your legs spread.
Wonwoo can feel the twitch in his cock, almost coming back to life as he watches your little pussy push out his cum.
“You were so good darling, so good for me,” he mutters, kissing your temple as you lay there spent and exhausted.
“Fucking love you and your big cock,” you mutter, turning around to kiss him passionately.
Pride blooms within his chest, knowing he was your first. The elation Wonwoo feels is comparable to when you confessed your love for him.
He’s finally won. You’re his, and he can’t wait to show you how much he loves you every chance he gets. Not only by fucking your brains out but also with dates and random acts of affection. He can’t wait to show you off, to let the world know that you’re his best friend and girlfriend.
“Gonna clean you up okay? Then we can take a shower,” he imparts, wrapping you up in your blankets so you don’t get cold.
“Wonwoo?”
“Yes, baby?”
“I love you,” you call out, smiling at him lazily, your eyes tired but full of fondness.
“I love you, too.”
…
Wonwoo woke up that morning feeling refreshed. The sunlight beaming down on him through your curtains. Your nude body is pressing into him. He loves how he can observe you so closely, taking note of every line and freckle on your skin. The rays of the sun hit you, causing your skin to glow beautifully. Your breath steady as you sleep peacefully, curled against his side.
Wonwoo doesn’t know how long he was lying there admiring you and how gorgeous you are, but his excitement spiked when you began to stir.
“Good morning darling,” he whispers wistfully in your ear.
The smile that tugs along your lips makes his heart flutter, and he swears he’s never felt this whole in so long. He can’t remember the last time he felt happiness in its true form. The closest thing that made him experience this type of joy was that night in his bedroom watching NANA with you when you two were still in high school.
“Morning,” your voice is sickly sweet, enough to have him grinning at such early hours in the day.
Shifting from your spot, you prop yourself up using your forearms, hair moves swiftly with your movements.
“Sleep well?”
There’s a shy smile on your face, eyes twinkling with the sunlight, and Wonwoo can only presume that it was you recollecting the memories of last night.
“The best,” you mumble, leaning in to peck his lips.
What was meant to be an innocent peck turns into something more heated. Wonwoo grabs you so you’re sitting on his lap, a squeak erupting from your throat as he manhandles you.
“Wonwoo!” you yelp, slapping his bare chest.
He doesn’t respond to your dumbstruck reaction, instead, he continues to kiss you, harder than before. That morning he woke up a victim to morning wood, and the only way he could even fathom relieving himself was to fuck you senseless.
The angle he has you in is sinful, your bare cunt rubbing against his length, his hands firm on your hips, rubbing your folds against the underside of his cock.
Your head is thrown back, submitting to the pleasure that Wonwoo continues to give you. Removing his hands, he lets you move on your own accord while he focuses on your breasts. His large hands squeeze the flesh, pinching your nipples till your eyebrows are strewn tight.
“Oh fuck…,” your voice trails, your head coming down, entranced by how Wonwoo’s hardness slides between your pussy lips.
Wonwoo groans, trying his best not to cum from how wet you’ve become from a little bit of foreplay. It almost feels like he’s still dreaming, watching your hips sway against him. The fuzzy feeling in his brain doesn’t cease, the same fuzziness he felt last night while you were under him, screaming his name.
“You like that, huh?” He mutters against your skin, trailing kisses all over your chest.
The same hands that were fondling your round breasts come down to your ass, lifting you. There is a whine that leaves you, and Wonwoo can feel your disappointment from the loss of contact.
The whine you let out dies quickly as Wonwoo forces you down on his erect cock, pushing your hips till you’ve fit the whole thing inside you. The breath is knocked out of his throat as your warm walls welcome him back into your heat. Being inside you is life-changing, his hand dull in comparison to the feeling your tight hole gives him.
“So big,” is all you can say.
“Wanna see you ride me, baby,” he breathes out, trying to centre himself so he doesn’t spurt his cum inside you before you even get to move.
Your fingers dig into the skin on his shoulders, and slowly, you lift yourself off him before slamming back down. Wonwoo grunts at your speed, not expecting you to use so much force.
“Shit. Slow down darling,” he sputters, trying to control the way you're bouncing furiously on him.
“I don’t wanna, it feels too good,” you pout, staring down at him with the most lewd expression.
Your jaw goes slack, panting for him like a dog in heat. He can feel your walls clench with each stride you take and the words he had on the tip of his tongue evaporate into thin air. He knows if he allows you to continue he won’t be able to savour you on top of him.
Instead of flipping you on your back, Wonwoo’s arms wrap around you, bringing you close to his chest. His feet are planted firmly against the mattress, he holds you tightly before fucking up into your delicious cunt.
“This pussy is fucking mine,” he growls, emphasizing his words with each thrust.
“Baby, I-I can’t, I wanna cum,” you sob, tears of pleasure running down your cheeks.
“Cum for me darling, give it to me,” and as if on command, you do exactly that.
Wonwoo’s palms drift to your ass, spreading your cheeks, squeezing them tight as he forces you to match his pace. Almost blinded by the sheer pleasure, he pumps into you a few more times before his semen floods your insides, thick and warm, it mixes with the nectar dripping from your heat. As he releases, he keeps his hands firmly on your waist, plugging you to ensure none of his cum spills out.
The two of you lay like that for a while, catching your breath after Wonwoo had fucked your brains out. Again. In all honesty, he’s convinced that he’ll never get tired of fucking you.
“I don’t think I’ll be able to walk tomorrow,” you sigh, voice muffled as you rest along the slope of his shoulder.
“So we can’t go again?” Wonwoo asks, feigning innocence, “Hey! Ow!”
The playful slap you give him on his bicep stings as he chuckles at your wordless response.
“No more,” you refuse his request.
“Oh, Wonwoo! You’re so big!” he imitates your voice from earlier, teasing you until you beg him to stop.
Propping yourself up, his flaccid cock slips out of you, the cum spilling onto his abdomen.
“You fucker!” you hit his chest again and Wonwoo erupts into a fit of laughter.
“Oh baby, this pussy is mine.” Your voice lowered in multiple octaves, copying the words he spoke out of lust, “Not so funny now, is it?”
Wonwoo continues to crack up at your embarrassed state, eyes turning to slits as he tries to calm himself down.
“Actually, it’s pretty funny,” he attests, grabbing your chin to kiss your cheek.
“Fine. I won’t say anything while we’re doing it anymore.” You complain, but he knows you secretly love it.
Wonwoo quirks an eyebrow up at you, in love with your playful side. Still sitting on his lap naked while you’re bickering with him is just as hot as you riding him with your boobs in his face.
“That wouldn’t stop me,” he shrugs, pretending to act nonchalant.
The best part of fucking you is how vocal you are, and it drives him insane.
“Whatever you horny loser,” you roll your eyes.
Grabbing your arms he pulls you down against him again, kissing your neck, and he can feel you relax under his touch.
“Says the one who has a massive dildo in their drawer,” he whispers in your ear before falling back onto the mattress, chuckling at your dumbfounded state.
“I’ve already told you! It was a gift from June and it's unused,” you huff, emphasizing the word unused.
“Sure it is,” he drawls, not convinced.
“I'm serious! I literally took it out of the box before beating you with it.”
“Whatever you say, darling,” he snickers before enveloping you in his arms, “let’s use it next time, yeah?”
For the rest of the day, you both lay there, talking about the most random things after a long but steamy shower. With fresh sheets on the bed, the atmosphere is filled with nothing but warmth and utter joy.
This past month or two has been a whirlwind of realizations. Realizations that have shifted the world around him into something beautiful. If someone had told him at the beginning of the school year that he would find a new meaning of love in you, he would’ve laughed with disbelief. But now that you’re here, sitting beside him with the most angelic smile on your face, he recognizes just how much comfort a single person can bring. Not even the fresh air that breezed through his fingers or the scent of the salty water misting its way onto the shore while he visited his hometown could outweigh the feeling of tranquillity that he got when he was with you.
Even though he regrets not confronting his feelings for you sooner, he can’t find a reason to complain. Everything had fallen into place, and for the first time since he was seventeen, he realized that the one person he was searching for was in front of him this whole time.
epilogue.
freshman year of university.
[8:56 p.m.] [you: raval tonite w junepi and the others?] [wons <3: yeah but can we leave early? i wanna play league after :)] [you: is this u tryna get out of drinking by being my dd?] [wons <3: maybe] [you: fineee but we leave at 12] [wons <3: anything for u darling] [you: darling?] [wons <3: u like it?] [you: yes!! its cute hehe] [wonwoo has changed your nickname to “darling <3”]
the end.
⊹ a/n: thank you for reading this story! this thing is my baby and i would love to hear your thoughts :) i appreciate everyone who took their time reading it because i poured my whole heart into it :") thank you again and see you in the next fic ♡ please rmbr to reblog and share your thoughts :3 it motivates me to continue writing stories like these for u ♡
#lola's recs <3#i couldn't finish yesterday bcuz i was bawling my eyes out lol#literally had to calm myself down before i read it again#anna#i love you so much#and thank you for writing and sharing this#<33
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👀 Tips and Tricks 👀
Here is a collection of useful tips and tricks to spotting and dealing with scams and those who try to share them. :)
Tip #1 - Stay calm.
This is the first and most important thing you should do in any situation involving strangers on the internet. Yes, it's okay to be unsure about something at first glance. They say that you should always trust your gut. But what you shouldn't do is let that fear and uncertainty make you hateful or spiteful towards those who might genuinely be seeking help.
Tip #2 - Wait! Let's investigate!
That ask/DM someone sent you isn't going anywhere. They send dozens of them out every day to people, so it won't hurt if you take 5-10 minutes to do a little research before you decide to take action.
Easy ways you can investigate:
1) Search the username of the person who sent the ask/DM. - You can do this by typing their name in tumblr's search function or: https://www.tumblr.com/search/username https://www.tumblr.com/tagged/username
2) Check the blogs archive to see how old it is. blogname.tumblr.com/archive.
3) Check the past reblogs of the pinned post they want you to share. - Does the persons 'real name' change every few weeks? (more on this trick here!)
4) Search part of the ask via google and the word 'tumblr'. - Do you find results of that same ask being sent by other blogs?
5) If they sent you a DM, ask questions. Ask a lot of questions. - Do they get mad or frustrated with you? - Do they try to change the subject? - Are they persistent about trying to get you to do something?
Tip #3 - Stay kind.
I know it can be overwhelming when you receive asks looking for help when you might not be able to offer anything in return. It's also 100% okay to not know if you're dealing with a real person in need or a scammer. But please, don't go around reporting every single ask you get with a gofundme saying it's a scam or making posts telling others to do the same. This might wind up hurting real people genuinely looking for help from others.
Tip #4 - It is okay to block and delete.
In many cases when you receive an ask looking for help, it's usually sent with a sad story of loss, tragedy, heartache, or an implied since of urgency. This is not to say situations from real, genuine people looking for help aren't emergencies.
Just remember:
You do not have to share any asks that are sent to you.
And it does not make you a bad person if you block someone.
Especially in the cases of scammers.
Tip #5 - Help protect one another other.
If you see that someone has shared a scam, let that person who shared it know what's going on. Let them know how and why that person they shared a post from is a scammer, tell them the various tips and tricks on how to spot scammers, and maybe they too will do the same for their friends, and so on and so forth.
If anything you might even help a lot of other people not fall for a scam if you do share their pinned post and tag it as being a scam with information as to how/why in your post.
Scammers love to change their usernames, their 'real names' on their posts and editing their stories around a little bit, and if people work together, we can help keep each other safe by making sure that others are scam aware.
----------
Thank you all for reading, I hope you all have a fantastic day and if you ever have questions about something you think might be a scam, don't be afraid to send me an ask. :)
Take care. <3
----------
Helpful links and guides: Scam Index (@scam-alerts) Useful guides to spotting scams (by @kyra45) A guide about scammers pretending to be Palestinian. A guide on how to spot Insulin Scams. Part 1 and part 2 of our current list of scammers.
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Nishimura Riki | NDA
☁︎︎ Idol!riki x fan!reader | fem!reader
↯ fluff, crack maybe suggestive a little more into the fic, use of social media (instagram, twt), reader is just a regular girl going to school and stuff
⚠︎︎ will contain mentions of alcohol consume later
-Love at first sight?-
“I swear to god Alija“
”Imagine you just want to work in peace and suddenly out of nowhere Jake and Ni-ki from fucking enhypen walk in and order a coffee from you” you say before taking another bite from the pizza Alija made for the both of you.
Alija giggles, “I would’ve freaked out honestly” she says.
“I DID freak out and you know it, but I had to keep it together somehow, you know”
“nah that’s true” she says between chewing her last bite.
“Like, I knew they’d be here in this area because of the concert” you start.
“but I would’ve never imagined that they come to our fucking workplace for coffee” you finish dramatically and slap your hands on your face.
“and the worst thing is” you exclaim and stand up abruptly “rikis hand touched mine”
“WHILE HE SMILED AT ME ALIJA”
Alija bursts out into laughter.
“I swear I fell in love even more” you sigh.
“I bet he’ll recognize you at the concert” she says as the supportive-equally-delusional best friend she is.
“He absolutely won’t” you answer
“Hyung do you remember the girl from the cafe this morning?” Ni-ki asks Jake, as they sit in Jakes hotel room and scroll through their phones.
Jake looks up from his phone and smirks.
“Yes of course”
Riki also looks up from his phone and sighs.
“I can't get her out of my head” he says and runs his free hand through his hair.
“I really wanna see her again, do you think she'll be at the concert?” he asks.
“I don't know, could be possible, she seemed a little nervous when we ordered” Jake chuckles.
“Can we go back tomorrow before the rehearsals?” Riki asks and looks at Jake, hoping he'll go back with him.
“yea I think that should fit” Jake answers him, still smirking.
“Why do you look at me like that?” Riki asks jokingly offended and throws his hands in the air.
Then suddenly he hears his phone go off.

After looking at his phone, Riki looks up to Jake who’s now holding in a laugh.
“I am really not” he whines “I- I just think she’s pretty you know”
Jake shakes his head and starts typing again.
After sending his last message, he walks over to Jake and jokingly threatens to kick him “I genuinely hate you” he says and lets himself fall onto the hotel bed.
“oh come on, there’s nothing bad about this”
Jake declares “Just give her your number tomorrow if you're so down bad already” he continues and shrugs his shoulders.
“No I cannot do that, what if it gets leaked or some shit like that” Riki groans while staring at the ceiling.
“True” Jake starts to speak while sitting down beside him, “but honestly, I guess it's a take it or it's probably gone forever kind of situation” he finishes his sentence.
“But isn't that problematic? What if she's a fan for real? Isn't that even-” Riki replies but get's cut off by Jake “fuck this problematic whatever stuff” he calls out “Nda's exist you know” he adds.
Riki hums.
“Just try and see where it goes, huh” he begins again. “Not everything has to ‘end’ negatively”
Riki nods and sits up. “I guess, yea” he answers while standing up.
“Then tomorrow 11 AM down in the lobby?” he asks before turning to leave the room.
“Sure, see you” he answers “and think about it” Jake exclaims before Riki leaves the hotel room, to go into his own.
His thoughts now running wild.
Should I do it and take the risk?
Would she even be interested?
What if it works out?
What if I'm in love for real?
Wait, does love at first sight exist?
He shakes his head, and rummages through his suitcase searching for the pajamas he packed, before changing and getting ready for bed.
But, he couldn't really sleep.
He turns from the left side, to the right side.
From his back to his stomach.
And again, from left to right.
From back to stomach.
But he couldn't get her out of his head.
masterlist | previous | next
tags: @chaevibes @yangjungwonnie @minskzy @d-dilemma @microwvdstrawb3rri3s @ssiiwave @deadpool15
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under read more bcs no one needs to see me complaining abt viktor's rework anymore but i need to whine my head is going insane so feel free to ignore this if u dont care abt it!
this is a downgrade. like, im sorry it looks worse, his face looks terrible and I hate his new shape sooo bad, he is hwei again (which is another mage). The stance is so.... meh.... hes just ||
its... uuughhh idk maaaaan,,, I liked full machine viktor... looks cute, just need getting used to the new shape (that i hate) so its not like its just that is new that is making me sad
Like yeah the OG looks a little clunky and couldve been improved a bit for more of that slick modern feel of league I guess, but the new look is jsut so.... flat? boring?? long???????
Thematically changing a character this much is..... it feels a bit insulting.... like these are not the same character, new vik just has some callbacks to the OG but thats it. He literally isnt even a machine herald anymore thats NUTS that they did that.
Fuck me for being this unlucky and getting extremely attatched to the guy that gets this treatment IG
Also I still stand by that making skins of masked characters where they show their face looks lame as hell
This shouldve been a new character, it wouldve made so much more sense and I wouldnt really throw a fuss abt it bcs itd be just a new target audience isntead of losing my beloved concept to magic twink number 5
bcs in the end arcane viktor is fiiiiine, hes ok, nothing against him, its just they murdered my favorite character for him to exist
dont care if i bought deathsworn viktor like 5 years ago i want a refund
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Overview of the things I've decided are canon for my son of zeus au so far (hopefully I don't forget any):
The gods are dicks. They arent *always* dicks, but I don't want to sugarcoat them from their original myths, they do bad shit and often
Denki is favored by Apollo, Dionysus, and Hermes the most, Persephone also likes him pretty well
Zeus is Zeus, meaning who knows when he'll decide he loves his son or hates his son or just genuinely doesn't care, he's such a little hypocrite bitch ain't he
Quirks are the exact same as they are in canon, the presence of the Greek gods didn't affect that at all, the gods have nothing to do with quirks and while they still are probably banging like rabbits they aren't really that active in Japan so no, no one else at UA is a demigod
Zeus slept with Kaminari's mom because he was intrigued by a mortal with a power in his domain (electricity) that didn't come from him
Since Kaminari's powers come from both his quirk and his dad, there's some complexities to them
Kamimari was born with lightning powers but they worked differently before his quirk actually manifested (I'm toying with the idea that his quirk manifested while being smiled by Zeus with lightning? I haven't decided if I like that or not yet)
Kaminari doesn't want other people knowing he's a demigod for classic hero story reasons but also because 1. Greek gods being real is a secret and he ain't about to be the one that spilled it 2. It'd be really complicated and annoying to explain and let's be real, at least one person would come out of that thinking he went crazy
Athena doesn't like him because, well, dunceface, duh. She does appreciate his strategic abilities though
Ares also doesn't like him because he doesn't like killing people, Ares and Athena hate that they dislike the same kid so much that they'd consider changing their tune about him on just that alone
In junior high he went on a big quest, I haven't decided on any details of it, but it involved a lot of fighting way to strong people while way too young as most quests do, this is also how he got into Apollo, Hermes, Dio, and Persephone's (and by extention Hades since he loves Persephone enough to deal with anyone she likes) good graces, the quest was likely given by Zeus and likely involved Hera trying to kill him
He's not really surrounded by people in the ancient greek community, it's not like he has a camp half blood and even if he did he'd skip it to go to UA training anyway, but he is pretty well known in those circles post big quest
I'm toying with the idea that he failed his first quest and thus had to go on a redemption quest
Kaminari doesn't like being serious, but despite what his classmates and teachers think, he CAN do serious, how else would he be such a big shot in the Greek community?
Imma be real, there was probably some kind of war that Kaminari had to lead an army in or something. I'm sorry, child soldier stories just have so many layers to dissect it's not my fault that they're compelling in a way
My point is, serious Kaminari is like war general levels serious, but not even LOA attacks are bad enough to bring out serious kaminari, are you kidding, did you gloss over the part about god war? He's having a little trouble taking literally any threat at UA seriously and he'll have trouble taking almost every threat as a pro hero seriously, it's not his fault junior high set the bar way too high on what situations are serious!
One of Kaminari's demigod powers, as the son of Zeus, is that he can't take fall damage. No matter how high up he falls from, he will never ever get worse than a few scrapes
Pissing him off really badly makes the sky get stormy, I'm talking immediate clear skies to nothing but gray clouds moving in and you can't even SEE the sky anymore, also possibly rain, he doesn't do it often but he can and he'd probably be able to control it if he were to practice his demigod powers along with his quirk but we all know he ain't gonna do that any time soon
He can sword fight, he hopes this never comes up
He has to keep reminding Dionysus about the legal drinking age, Dionysus thinks it's stupid and therefore never listens, they have argued about it multiple times
Apollo and Kaminari play chess together on occasion
Hermes at one point gave Kami a special knife when he decided he liked him enough to give him a gift, it's a magic thief's blade which is just a dagger that cannot be found on his person no matter what you do. Pat him down? You won't feel it. Scan him? It didn't show. Metal detector? It didn't beep at all. But he can pull it out whenever. He won't but he does *have* it just in case. I'm also deciding if making it not be able to leave him would be too much. I don't want it to feel like a riptide ripoff, I'm thinking maybe it sprouts wings and flies to him?
Yes, I've just decided, the Thief's Knife will fly to him if left behind and can squeeze into any crack no matter how small to get to him
I'm shinkami trash so you KNOW shinkami is about to be canon in this au
In either 2A or 3A, Kaminari tells Shinsou his secret about the gods being real and him being Zeus' son, he spends a great amount of time explaining all the details to Shin and answering his questions, it's a lot
What can I say? Shinsou is gus confidant, he was gonna have to tell him at some point 🤷🏻♀️💅
He doesnt tell anyone else, but obv they've got to eventually find out somehow, what you think I'd just let it be lame?? Even after they find out, he won't tell them anything he doesn't have to, waits until it comes up to explain things, it's just too complicated he doesn't want to go through all that AGAIN and with twenty people this time
Oh and before you ask, I'm gonna say no on the flying thing. I know it could be a power of a Zeus kid, I know it could be cool, but no. No he cannot fly.
I can't think of anything else right now but I can't wait to wake up in a cold sweat tonight and realise what i forgot
Also, I'm gonna go ahead and tag @iys-cloud since I know iys really likes this au :]
#son of zeus au#denki kaminari#zeus#dionysus#hermes#apollo#athena#ares#persephone#hades#greek mythology#shinkami#hitoshi shinsou#class 1a#demigods#demigod au#mha#bnha#greek gods#greek myths#au overview#i think thats all i got
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The Arrangement - Part 12
Summary: Jake's done a lot of things to keep his sister, and then his niece, safe from his parent's influence and manipulation. If he wants to keep them safe, he has to marry you.
Warnings: Anxiety, Bad parents and siblings, Talking about abuse. Let me know if I missed any!
Part 11 - Part 13
Series Masterlist
It had been just over a week since your wedding. You and Jake have improved your communication. He's also managed to really set himself up in the home theater where he'd spent that first night. Apparently one thing your parents got right was the massive pair of recliners specifically for that room. Jake swears they're more comfortable than most of the beds he's slept on over the years. It makes you feel better about taking the master bedroom for yourself. Clay had visited again bringing a few duffel bags of Jake's things, including his computer. The massive screen for the theater worked really well for his setup.
While you were cooking, Clay had made sure to update Jake on the status of his family. Things were working pretty well, but there were going to be a lot of paper trails to hide so that they couldn't be followed. Or at least, not followed easily. Aisha and Cougar had both caught a couple of people following his family around that were confirmed to be employed by his parents. Hopefully now that Jake had his computer he could get some better intel on the parents' finances and connections.
But you weren't privy to that update. Jake and Clay agreed it was safer to keep you in the dark about the details. Though Jake didn't doubt your sincerity, there were still too many unknowns about you.
You really didn't mind that they got quiet whenever you were near. Your mind was already at maximum anxiety with Travis, your brother, still being in the Intensive Care Unit. Your parents had been acting unusually as the week progressed and Travis didn't get better. According to the police report he'd been seen drinking heavily with friends before trying to drive home. Usually one of his friends would be the designated driver and keep everyone's keys but, somehow, Travis had gotten his keys.
And now your parents seemed to be readjusting their life plans, and yours as well. The one time you were allowed to visit the hospital you'd overheard your parents murmuring about "he can't be seen like this," "he'll be seen as weak," and other similar thoughts. It made you worried you and Jake would be even more under their scrutiny, set to even higher standards. Your breath hitched as you realized they may demand a grandchild to help change the public perception of the family to one of hope or something like that.
You and Jake were getting ready for your first public event as a couple. You're helping Jake pick out the right suit while doing your best to answer his questions about what to expect, what is appropriate conversation, how much both of you needed to talk to others before you could leave. You know you're missing things. Jake does, too. But neither of you can think of the questions to ask so you establish a silent signal for help. Jake squeezes your hand three times and you either step in or whisper some advice in his ear. It's not a great system, but it's all you can do for now.
Jake hates how he looks in all of this but he knows it's not about him or his comfort. At least he doesn't have to wear the torture device you call a dress. The thing looks impossibly tight on you. He's worried about your ability to breathe. And the stiletto heels have you warning him you'll be on his arm all night to help you keep your balance. Jake actually takes comfort in that because he really doesn't want to be left alone at this event. Probably any event, but this first one especially.
As the car pulls up Jake takes a deep breath and you attempt the same.
"We can do this, right?" He says quietly.
"I believe we can," you nod. You gently squeeze his hand in reassurance like you did that first morning with the parents.
He nods, "let's do this."
As soon as he's able Jake is out of the car and opening your door for you. The last time he did so you were scared of each other. Now you make sure to give him a small smile of thanks as he takes your hand. The elevator ride to the party is as quiet as the one you took together your wedding night, but less oppressively so. It isn't until the elevator doors open that you both put on your fake smiles. Both of you taking small comfort in the fact that neither of you is suffering alone.
After the first couple hours Jake is ready to punch someone, anyone, just so he can be forced to leave since he's not allowed out yet. He's incredibly grateful you insisted on eating a little something beforehand. The food here is barely edible and dissolves faster than cotton candy. He hates the wine? Champagne? Whatever the hell it is, he hates the taste of it but, in following your lead, he knows he has to at least sip often enough to warrant a replacement glass every 30 minutes or so. Jake was grateful to have your weight on his arm to help keep him grounded.
Especially when Charles Blackwood, a "friend" of his from high school, showed up. Charles had been nothing but a leech throughout all of high school but Jake was desperate for some kind of friendship.
"Jacob! Where have you been?" Charles holds out his hand and Jake grips it firmly.
"I've been okay, Charles. You?"
"Holy crap, you're married now? Is that why you finally came out of hiding?"
"Sort of," he admits.
He goes to introduce you but Charles stops him. "I know this lovely lady quite well," he admits. You avert your eyes. "We were engaged for some time."
"You were?"
"Didn't she tell you?" Charles smirks. "Would've been married for two years now if her parents hadn't stepped in."
"For once I'm glad they did," you interject. "You're a conman who shouldn't be here."
Charles gives a small laugh, "well look who finally grew up. Too bad you didn't pick up on what was going on before I got you into bed." Your cheeks burn with embarrassment. "How are those dolphin projects going?"
"Sharks," Jake snipes. "Her focus was on sharks."
"Ooo, nerd standing up for nerd. How cute."
"You need to leave us alone," Jake fumes. "She is my wife and I won't let you insult her."
Charles scoffs, "since when can you fight?"
"Since boot camp."
That gives Charles pause. He searches Jake's face for tells that he's lying but finds none.
"Yeah, alright," Charles concedes. "Just don't ruin this party for me. Lots of other potential targets."
As soon as he was out of hearing range you let out a breath. "I'm so sorry," your voice quavers. "I should have...I should have told you."
"Told me what? That your ex-fiance is an asshole? That's not something you need to divulge."
"No...that...that I'm not..."
Jake leans in so that you're the only one who hears him. "You're more than just your virginity status. I'm sorry your first time was with him, he doesn't seem the type to make your pleasure a priority, but I'm not upset that you've had sex before."
You take as deep a breath as you can to steady yourself. "Thank you for that."
"So, can we leave the party yet?"
You check Jake's watch, trying not to be obvious about it. "We've got at least another half hour."
"When we do get out of here, would you be up for going out for some real food?"
You chuckle, "maybe delivery? Or take out? I'm not going to be able to eat much in this dress."
"Fair. And thank you for helping me get through all of this."
"Thank you for listening to my advice," you counter.
"Always," Jake affirms.
Part 11 - Part 13
Series Masterlist
Tagging: @alicedopey; @ashdoctor; @delicatebarness; @ellethespaceunicorn; @embarrasingmf;
@irishhappiness; @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @lokislady82;
@ronearoundblindly; @thiquefunlover63
#jake jensen#jake jensen x reader#jake jensen x female reader#arranged marriage au#jake jensen x you
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I've always found it so interesting how Vil describes himself and his actions as ugly, not his appearance. I'm tired af rn so I can't really put it into words, but it's very striking that Vil, at least to me, doesn't seem to believe in outward ugliness. In fact, he simply calls people potatoes. Not ugly. Potatoes. As some analysis' pointed out, it seems to be because he seems them as spudlings who haven't yet reached their potential. Like Quartz said, he doesn't want to change everything about you. He wants you to be the best you can be.
He is, as also Quartz said, a very selfless character and he seems to strive to be more than what he's been typecast as. That's part of why he had such an extreme breakdown from his actions and called himself "ugly." He was a villain. He was behaving just like others assumed he would. And if he's no more than the roles he's been trapped in, how could he possibly defeat Neige?
But in book 6, he had his "hero" moment. What he did was a huge sacrifice to make, especially when you consider what Vil risked. He risked literally his entire future and his reputation.
There are some fans who poke fun at him for being "shallow" crying about his appearance, but... wouldn't you?
Firstly, there's Vil's career. Remember, Vil is an actor and a model. He works in two industries that are centred around beauty. You can't have wrinkles, you can't be fat, you can't be unappealing for even a second. You must conform to beauty standards at all times. That includes not just your appearance, but what you eat and what activities you partake in, since certain eating habits and hobbies are associated with certain appearances (e.g ugly gamer).
Now that he's like this... who's going to want him as a model? Who's going to want to cast him in any role outside of an evil old hag, if they want him at all? How will his fans, the faceless masses who fixate on his appearance, react? Is there any guarantee they'll stick around?
Vil's entire future has potentially gone up in flames. He's been acting and modelling since he was a small child. What else could he possibly do?
Secondly, there's the fact that Riddle just got white hair, while Vil got all of his youth sucked out of him. He was not old just in appearance, his body was old. That's his entire future suddenly severed. He's human, and humans don't live for very long compared to fae.
From Vil's perspective, the decades of life ahead of him are gone. Now, in this frail body, who knows how much time he has left? Who knows what health problems might start ailing him and taking him early?
Well gee, no wonder he's crying! He might lose everything and he might also die much sooner than expected. I hardly find that shallow.
I find the comparison of Vil to a stereotypical mean girl overall very weird. Mean girls purposefully bully and tear down others to lift themselves up. When they insult people's fashion or appearance, it's not because they think they can improve. It's because they view those people as below them. Sometimes the outfit itself isn't even bad. It's just "poor people clothing."" Mean girls are also very manipulative and will tear others down to climb up the ladder and come out on top, even if they have to cheat and lie to do so.
Vil isn't like that at all. He doesn't insult, he criticises. And like I said, he sees people's potential and wants them to live up to it. His goal is not to tear them down and make himself feel better. As far as fashion goes, Vil knows different styles work on different people, and with how his character is, he's most certainly not going to hate or bully someone for using a "poor brand" or whatever.
Vil literally refuses to cheat!!! He does not want to win against Neige through cheating, because he knows that's not truly a win. He wants to earn that win. When he tried to poison Neige, that was a complete mental breakdown and he immediately regretted it.
So yeah. Vil is a harsh, but nurturing and actually very kind and selfless guy. Leave him.
(If I got anything wrong pls forgive me I haven't read book 5 in a while. @v-anrouge you're the Vil expert pls lmk if there's anything to add or correct)
Vil yap session
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I use Windows Night Light to help my sleep schedule, and it sucks so much. Half the time it doesn't even turn on. When that happens, I have to manually go click "Turn Off" (even though it was clearly not on), then click "Turn On" again, at which point it works.
So I went to go see whether there was a fix for this, and I saw all kinds of inconsistent suggestions, and I tried some of them, and it didn't actually fix anything. There are complications that come with having certain graphics cards, or drivers, and ...
Alright, look, I was a software engineer for many years, I know that sometimes things are more complicated than they seem. However, I cannot fathom why "adjust monitor colors at X hour" is so difficult that there are pages upon pages of complaints about it not working. It should work in the vast majority of cases, and what shouldn't fix it is just clicking a button to stop it and then clicking a button to start it again.
What I'm saying is that I'm in the market for a program that will do this very simple job, since apparently the bad behavior of this one is something that's just not getting fixed.
flux is not it. While I'm exasperated by the continual issues with Night Light, I am actively angry with flux. I live fairly far north by American standards. Sunset for me, right now, is 4:30PM. I like to have normal colors on my computer when I am, e.g. watching a show, playing a game, looking at pictures, etc. I only really need the warm colors in the three or four hours before I go to sleep. Flux is free software, so I try to keep my cool, but "please let me set my time manually rather than by location" is their single most requested feature, and every time they say "oh actually flux is for having your screen be in harmony with the natural environment, you don't need that". Maybe this is just steadfast refusal to engage in scope creep, but I've read a bunch of forum messages asking for the same feature that I want, and the answers are always "I don't understand why you would want that" or something equally infuriating in spite of how many times someone says "I'm a Finnish graphic designer with weird working hours" or equivalent.
The standard workaround seems to be telling flux that you're located in a different part of the world than you actually are, but this is terrible UI, and you would also need to change it in accordance with the time of year unless you spent some time figuring out the correct spot that you don't live which works year-round for you.
(I saw another hilarious workaround on the flux forums where a guy set up a scheduled Windows task to kill and restart flux at specific times.)
So I hate flux, in spite of my commitment to not hate free software that did not cost me anything and has never asked for anything from me.
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Good news, I felt in the mood to explore Vampire social dynamics and vocalizations in writing so I had written this out this morning.
Fair warning, it's entirely unedited.
The first new sound Haruka had learned from her son was a low warble.
They were two preteen twins, and human or not they were almost impossible to control. No matter how many times she scolded them, they always seem to find a way to get into trouble.
‘What have I said about rough housing inside?’ she would huff, gesturing over a broken vase. ‘Take it outside!’
'Sorry…' Lan muttered.
‘wrooble wrooble wrooble.’ Hub warbled.
Yes, Mom, is what she’d come to learn it meant.
When Hub finally came home after missing for months, he was different. He was alert, movements sudden and yet his stance perfectly still. His now red eyes watched the world, wide and silent, as if seeing someplace entirely new for the first time.
For Haruka, it was almost like seeing someone new for the first time.
That is not my son, she first thought, yet over time she began to see traces of who he used to be beneath the inhuman exterior. Despite no longer being able to eat his favorite food, he still pestered his brother first thing in the morning. His footsteps were impossibly silent down the hall, but he still poked his head into her bedroom after a bad dream. He could no longer touch the sunlight, but he still watched the old birdhouse in the backyard like he always did.
The second noise she learned was a strange rattling sound. It found its way before laughter, or whenever Lan playfully shoved his brother. He made it when she pat his head, or when he was curling up in bed for the night.
It was also a precursor to bursts of energy and broken vases. She learned to always keep watch if she heard it down the hall.
The third noise was the easiest to understand, or so she thought. The first time Hub had hissed was when there was a knock at the door from the mailman. His fingers had dug into the fabric of the chair as he exposed his fangs at the door, and it nearly scared her half to death. He apologized profusely, he always did, but the hissing never stopped.
He hissed at Lan, he hissed at her, he hissed at his own father when he found the time to be home. Whether she accidentally startled him in the hall, or a light was turned on too quickly, it was always the same.
‘Hisss—! Sorry.’ He’d mumble, covering his mouth.
Of all the changes, this new aggression gave her the most heartache. Did he not feel safe around them? Or had he changed too much, no longer her son, and she was simply housing a monster wearing his skin? Did he hate them for what happened?
She could never forget the way his pupils narrowed. For a split second he seemed like something completely different.
A predator.
She held these fears as she walked home from the convenience store late one night. She had forgotten to buy butter and took Hub with her so he could stretch his legs without worrying about the sun. He walked silently by her side, almost like a shadow glued to her leg as she appreciated the quiet, calm neighborhood they lived in.
An older gentleman walked towards them, on the way to the store with an empty reusable bag in hand. Haruka didn’t give him a second thought. She didn’t even look his way till Hub suddenly gripped her leg with terrifying force.
‘Hiiissss!’
There came no apology.
The older man stepped back, red eyes catching the street light as he bared his own fangs. He let out a terrifying snarl that shot through her like ice in her veins. It was the sound of something built to kill her, that wanted to kill her. Something that some part of her always knew to fear underneath the bed or in the closet.
Hub’s hisses seemed like a kitten in comparison.
‘Hiiisssssssss!’ Hub hissed again, more forcefully.
Haruka couldn’t move. It was as if her blood at turned to ice. She was paralyzed. A small voice deep inside told her it was too late. She couldn’t escape. She would die here.
Hub let out a low, threatening rumble like she had never heard before. The older gentleman bared his fangs before letting out a snort.
“You really think you can take me? Besides, she’s too much for you. How about this, we split her.”
Hub hissed again. It was then that she learned the true meaning behind it all.
Mine.
It was defensive. It was protection. It wasn’t aggression at all. For an agonizing moment, all three stood like ice sculptures lit up in the dark by the overhead street light, a moment carved into time.
Then Hub huffed and spoke in a low growl. “You smell lonely.”
The man bared his fangs once again, but took a step back, then another. Without another word, he turned away, and walked into the shadows, seemingly swallowed by the night till she could no longer see him.
Haruka fell to her knees and sobbed.
Hub carefully wrapped his arms around her, in that slow, cautious way he had ever since he returned from Scilabs.
“Sorry…” He whispered.
She threw her arms back around him and held him close till she could hear him let out a familiar rattle.
“I’m sorry too.” She cried.
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